#saiki kusuo you are so fucking silly

[oceanwithouthermoon]

(vol8 vs vol18)

did he buy a fucking cellphone when he got more friends ???? ☠️☠️☠️

[kusuokisser]

nice one, saiki! that sure is true!

[tojiphile]

when your teacher assigned him to be your tutor, you’re sure he didn’t expect it to end up like this. it’s 5:46pm on a school night and instead of studying, your panties are bunched around your ankles, your cropped skirt flipped up and your blouse unbuttoned obscenely. your sports bra barely keeps your tits in place as your alleged ‘tutor’ bends you over your desk, fucking you silly.

“well, what’s the answer?” he asks, one hand on your waist and the other rubbing small circles around your swollen clit. “i- ‘s too much!” you cry, trying to squirm out of his grip. he traps you in place firmly, slipping his cock in and out of your cunt slowly, causing you to tremble with desire.

“please…” you beg, hot tears spilling down your face, “i- i can’t do this anymore!” you’ve been in this position for an hour; your clit overstimulated and your pussy desperate for more. he’s brought you so close so many times but never once did he let you cum. “why should i?” he scoffs, “stupid girls don’t deserve nice things.”

“if you answer correctly, i’ll fuck you properly. how’s that sound?” he baits you, hook, line and sinker. he asks the question again and you strain your brain to find the correct answer, trying your best to resist his delicate touch.

inevitably, you never get the answer right. that’s okay though, because at the end of every class, your tutor always says, if you can’t be smart, you could always be his little trophy wife. still, stupid girls don’t deserve to cum, so he focuses himself on relieving his own stress, pounding into you like a dog in heat, bullying your cunt and stuffing it full with his cock.

you still feel good though, because at least you’re useful for something! <3

TSUKISHIMA KEI, GETO SUGURU, nanami kento, tendou satoori, sugawara koishi, TETSURO KUROO, takahiro hanamaki, ryomen sukuna, ooc!saiki kusuo, kamisato ayato, KAEYA ALBERICH

[dogbunni]

@crawling-crawly speak, and u will be fed.

[a thousand dandelion fluffs gather and then disperse to reveal several hand crafted nensai headcanons] [they're gourmet and delicious]

-saiki and nendo are that one couple that never tells anyone they're together. they just expect (for very different reasons) everyone else to figure it out. it takes a very long time for anyone else to figure it out.

-saiki is not a fan of pda. nendo is the biggest fan of pda, but saiki has fought him down to just the ever present arm slung over his shoulder. nendo thinks this is peak romance anyway, so

-love wins

-youd think nendo would be the weird one in the relationship, what with saiki and his Normal Guy kin. you'd be wrong. sometimes nendo shows up at saiki's house and finds him speed reading an entire library of books about the history of oboes, just for fun, and he's like, what the fuck, kusuo

-seriously if nendo is able to pick up on your weirdness you are beyond help

-saikis favourite pastime is grabbing nendo's chin in one hand and squishing it to make the butt shape more pronounced. he thinks it's so fucking funny. but he keeps a straight face so he's just like :| while squishing nendo's chin together and nendo's like :| when will it end

-they nap together a lot

-their shared love of food is the focus of pretty much all of their dates

-nendo knows saiki dislikes "speaking", and actively encourages him to communicate in ways he finds comfortable. saiki rarely speaks in nendo's company

-nendo learns sign language to support his bf. he does this in secret and then once he can sign enough to hold a basic conversation he "surprises" saiki with his new skill. I say "surprises" bc it turns out that sign language is not something that saiki's brain automatically translates so he has no idea what is going on.

-its very easy for saiki to learn though, and he mentally slaps himself for not thinking of it sooner

-what I'm saying is, nendo and saiki communicate primarily in JSL

-nendo buys cute little plushies for saiki and then makes saiki hold it up while he takes pictures of him. his lockscreen changes weekly and it's a picture of saiki holding a different plushie every time.

-saiki and mrs nendo get along very well. she's almost a normal parent and saiki loves that

-nendo gets along well with kurumi. they cook together. 'nough said

-nendo does not believe in kuniharu rights

-sometimes saiki gets nendo to just lay directly on top of him. human weighted blanket

-nendo has seen saiki have multiple breakdowns about not being normal and wanting his powers to go away. nendo says the most profound and heartfelt things every time and sits next to his partner until saiki is ready for a hug <3

-this all being said nendo gets on saiki's last mf nerve. when he mooned the entire airport. saiki wanted to kill him.

-nendo thinks saiki should be silly more. he lives for saiki's silly moments. like one time they spent ages stacking empty coffee jelly pots on nendo's head, and saiki laughed, causing all 27 jelly pots to fall catastrophically. it's one of nendo's core memories

-saiki looks at nendo and thinks hnfnnfnhhn big

-nendo looks at saiki and thinks ngnhngnmgnghhh cute

-nendo always got a hand in saiki's hair. its so soft

-theyve never said I love you aloud but they DO sign it

-they absolutely talk shit about their friends in JSL

-saiki will (whilst heaving a sigh) drop everything to help nendo with his homework

-when people find out that they're together, most will ask saiki what he sees in nendo. but saiki thinks the question should be the other way around. nendo is so attentive and loving, so free with his affection, kind, caring, confident, funny, and always willing to go the extra mile just to make saiki's life a little better. on the other hand, saiki is a miserable tsundere who is so easily irritated and hates showing affection, and saiki wholeheartedly believes that he does not deserve him.

-nendo thinks he's just the luckiest guy in the world. saiki could have anybody and he chose him??? every day is a blessing.

-theyre very wrapped up in each other. it takes a while for the others to realise, but once they do they can't un-notice how they're always together, stuck to each others sides like glue

[billiuspendragon]

Okay so... I made the Saiki K characters on the Sims 3. And there be drama (granted, I've made most of the drama up, but shhhhh)

WARNINGS for murder plots and snubbing.

First, Kusuo decided to snub Teruhashi, which is honestly canon - but then he WOULDN'T STOP

The snub action was glitched in place, and there was nothing I could do to remove it.

Now, this may be canon accurate, but I don't want these silly little guys to hate each other forever, so you know what I gotta do.

That's right, I need to murder Saiki and then bring him back to life. Can't be too hard, can it?

First of all, Saiki's gonna need someone close to bring him back from the dead, so I think it's time to repair his relationship with his dear older brother.

Unfortunately, Kusuke only knows how to communicate through competition, so they didn't get very far.

Luckily, we have others who can get close to Kusuo. Cue in Akechi Touma.

The problem with Saiki, is that it's near impossible to kill him. He's immune to the heat and the cold, he can't burn, can't drown, can't starve. I wouldn't want to do the latter two anyway - I don't want to give him a horrible drawn-out death like that, I just couldn't do it!

So Kusuke has helpfully decided to look into chemistry - maybe he can find a poison that can kill him.

But I forgot that Kusuke's a failure and he couldn't discover shit /lh

I realised this was because he was running purely on coffee, so I let him have a good night's rest (for once in his goddam life).

(he and Kusuo have twin beds)

ANYWAY, while this is happening, Kaido's doing... Whatever the fuck this is

(he's rubbing a werewolf's belly, but it looks weird as hell)

And Touma has succeeded in becoming Kusuo's good friend!

Next

[hillbilly---man]

What is your most and least favorite part of writing?

Do you want to be published some day?

What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

What is your most and least favorite part of writing?

Already answered, so I'll share the second place ones:

Next favorite part: I love how writing makes me more interested in the characters! If I'm writing a fic featuring a character that I feel like I need to understand more, I'll usually watch a few of their episodes and analyze them a bit. I hardly ever write a fic because I like a certain character, but because they're the one who fits the concept. However, I usually come out of writing it a little more of a fan of theirs for a while. Hotel Valentine made me a little bit of a Toritsuka girlie for a while lmfao 😔

Next least favorite: describing shit. People don't just stand still and expressionless in an empty room when they talk, but GODDDDD I wish they did. Unfortunately I do enjoy the color that adds to my stories, so I gotta do it anyway

Do you want to be published some day?

NOOOOO

As much as I love attention and praise, I think publication would bring so much more pressure than I would ever enjoy. Besides, I'm not serious at all about writing so improving that much isn't really a goal of mine

(that said, I think it would be neat to be put in an anthology or something without my permission though. It's fucked up but I'd be so honored that someone would want to steal my work lmfao)

What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

I think the concepts I come up with are pretty cool (to me, at least. But that's what matters)

Kumi suddenly gets visited by Kusuo way more often than usual and she's confused about why, Teruhashi finds out that Saiki has powers but she thinks they're new and tries to support him, Toritsuka is a ghost slowly losing his grip on himself, post-canon Saiki has to do odd jobs to buy a car, etc

Some are more gimmicky than others, but i love them. Even the silly ones I'm never gonna finish lol

[joshhere911]

Ibjust reread the chapter where kusuo skips school and nendo n kaido come over to check on him and make food for him and OH MYGOD IM EXPLODING ST THE SEAMS💥💥💥

Im literally like i love them so so much and its so incredibly funny that saiki will judt . Skip school to be average hes so funny dude

It also implies that saiki woke up, decided to skip, and immediately fall back asleep(/had a premonition) until school was over and his friends had time to walk over while he was slemping

Fuck is this guy sleeping so long for

Anyways just a reminder that saiki either just didnt have Any friends (or atleast not close ones) that came to visit him when he wasnt in school and hes just so . Unfamiliar with them going to His house of all places bc hes Been to saikos house to give him schoolwork but no ones ever done it for Him and hes just so hes so silly and i love him so much i want to squeeze him 💥💥💥

When they cook for him i hust i 💥💥 i hope this makes any sense you guys get jt right

[sillysnack]

hii cloud info dump to me abt kusuo if you want :)

hello ali i have been really excited to answer this question since last night and because i have decided to give up studying for an upcoming quiz on chemistry, i am going to talk about saiki kusuo :3333

for starters he is canon transmasc :-) i forgot what chapter it is, but he mentions that when he was born he came out as a girl but he changed it to boy!!!! using his powers!!!

speaking of powers he has a fuck ton of them. 🙏🏼🙏🏼 telepathy, telekinesis, pyrokinesis, psychometry (this one is when he touches an object and he like sees its history :P s2ep11 is my favorite instance of him using it ^_^), shapeshifting (he uses it a lot in the show (probably not a lot but. there are times he shapeshifts as a cat)! he can even change genders ♡ he goes by 'kuriko' in his girl form! ), cloning, mind control, ability that lets him reverse time for a certain object (just by a day when hes wearing his limiters)

kusuo (in canon) is currently a 3rd yr in high school (like. gr12 ?) but most of the series takes place in his 2nd year (which happens a Lot because he reverses earth by a year sometimes... he was just in a silly mood (JK theres lore))

there is so many to say about kusuo actually... he’s a very kind person towards others but not so much to himself ☹️ his family treats him. differently his whole life because of his powers like... his older brother's constantly competing with him and their parents dont even. do shit??😭 it gets so bad his brother even manipulates one of ku's friends 😭 a tamer instance of his older brother bringing in ku's friends to their competitions is when he flies his two friends to london and he (older brother) just has to chase the three of them

oh also he loves all sweets but his ultimate favorite is coffee jelly yeaaaahhh

[jkgnggj]

Never saw this addition but now that I have I wanna add onto it lmaoo

The psychickers always thought the other group were just... Y'know, joking around. Like just being silly when they said nice things Abt saiki and how kind and quiet he is. They always just played it off for laughs. Until they witness shit and they're like shocked to the core (Akechi pisses himself bc of how shocked he is) like Tori even pulls shun aside like alright chihuahua what did you do to make saiki like you? Did you bribe him? How many coffee jellies?! And shuns like wtf man I didn't do anything saikis just nice like that. But Tori is skeptical. Or saiki will be nice to nendou and Miko will be like uh do I got glitter in my eye or did I see that right? Who are you and what did you do to my kusuo?! And the psychickers are all worried and fretting over saiki like are you ok?! Do you have a fever?! Are you feeling well?!

One time they overhear the others gushing about how kusuo is a good listener and gave them a present they had their eye on for a while etc. and then Toritsuka passes by and is like "damn no fair. For my birthday saiki gave me a black eye and three broken ribs ;-;" and everyone's just dead silent and then they turn around and keep talking completely ignoring the germ. Best thing is nobody believes Tori yk.

Ok but on a serious note although he has a different relationship with both of his friend groups saiki still loves and cherished them in his own way. Like he is worried over his friends safety bc they got the shittiest timing and bad luck and bc they're also dumb and naive as hell so he's gotta babysit them like the mom of the group bc he feels responsible for them bc he's got powers that will help keep them safe yk? And sure he also looks out for the psychickers but not actively. Like he'll keep Miko safe bc of her job and help kechi if he bumps into bullies and uh... Heal Tori when hes on the brink of death (though that's usually because saiki made him see God). But he knows the psychickers are more or less capable of not needing his help bc they are actually competent (despite him calling them incompetent and useless all the time). Well except Tori, he's actually useless and incompetent but he's a danger to society so the world is better of without him teehee. Ok no but srsly saiki can be more upfront and honest with the psychickers bc they know his secret and with this secret comes other parts of his personality that were hidden. He puts up a bit of a front and some distance between him and his friend group bc they don't know Abt his secret and so he feels like they'd stop liking him if he did so ofc he's not gonna mess that up and he mean to them. But with the psychickers they know how dangerous he is (or at least how dangerous he perceived himself to be) and still willingly stick by his side like glue or more accurately like the fucking gun that u accidentally step on and gets stuck to the bottom of your fucking shoe and now u can't even scrape it off goddamn what a nuisance (affectionately). So yeah he lets up a little and maybe tries even harder to push them away by being mean and violent but that only pulls them closer to his heart <3

The main Saiki friendgroup and pk psychics are mostly seperate group right? And Saiki acts deferently with both of them so what happened is someone from the main friendgroup (like Kaidou or sth) witnesses some "weird" Saiki behavior? Like Saiki being more sarcastic and mean or even violent thowards Toritsuka, while hanging out with him. Or he hears Saiki calmly saying "kill yourself" and he's shocked that Saiki, who is so nice and calm could say something like that, even to the germ. Or Teruhashi overhears a conversation between Aiura and Toritsuka that goes like: "Yo wheres Saiki" "oh he's stalking that guy again" "again? Damn he needs to leave that poor guy alone" and she's like "what? Stalking? I never thought Saiki was like that". Or the groups combine and they’re playing "who is the most likely to..." and there’s a question like "whos most likely to tell you to kill yourself/beat someone up" and the psychickers are automaticaly like "Saiki" "Saiki-san" "Kusuo" and everyone else questions if they even know him.

[realcube]

ARCADE

summary ★ she needs to get the action figure that's in the claw machine for her sister’s birthday, so saiki does her the favour of using his a telekinesis to win it...along with a few other favours.

trigger warning ★ gambling, god, swearing, fem!reader & reader has a younger sister

construction on the new arcade near pk academy had finally come to an end. the grand opening was today after school so of course, nendou suggested that they attend as a squad. usually, saiki tried to avoid getting roped into outings like this but for a change, he actually agreed without the need for any further prying. that's because the arcade was attached to a small cinema where they'd be premiering the latest action movie — based on the TV show adaptation of the game — 'Olfana's Story X-2'. as it turns out, a few months after saiki gave the game a shot, it became a craze and a massive hit among speed-runners. so from it's new-found popularity, they developed a TV show series which inevitably flopped so now they have created a movie. only the most elite people among the gaming community were allow to see it before the official release date and they all said it was incredible; but there was not a doubt in saiki's mind that they were being paid to sing it's praise. a crappy game turned into a crappy show, now adapted into a movie was sure to be crappy. so you may be wondering why he even wanted to view the movie if he was set on it being awful. Well, there are two simple answers; curiosity and the mystery. since it was so exclusive, he had yet to overhear spoilers through his telekinesis and he now had a germanium ring in his possession so he could watch the movie in peace. also, having played the game but not seen the show, he was curious to see how bad the movie is going to be and perhaps he'd be able to get a good laugh out of it. but he made the mistake of mentioning his plan to see the movie which screened a few hours after the opening of the arcade, as now kuboyasu, nendou and kaidou were all going to see the movie along with him. In theory, it shouldn't be a problem since he'll have his germanium ring on but in practise, the world seems to be against saiki so one of his friends will probably end up stealing his popcorn or chatting throughout the entire movie. he'll just have to wait and see. kaidou and nendou did not even stop to take breaths as they raced on about how excited they were while they were all walking to the arcade. "i'm sure the movie is going to be sick!" kaidou exclaimed, followed by rapid head nods from nendou as he replied, "yup! And i can't wait to see what sort of games they have!" saiki was a bit excited himself but he didn't care to show it like the others did. but when he saw the vaporwave building covered with bright neon lights come into view, his lips curled into a small smile. though it was short-lived as he noticed the massive queue to get in; it appeared as though they weren't the only ones who had the idea to visit the arcade after school as he noticed many familiar faces standing in line, amongst crowds of others. all of their cheery auras dissipated for a few moments until kuboyasu perked up, approaching the doors to the arcade with a smug smirk, cutting in front of everyone in the line and gesturing for the boys to follow him, "don't worry about the queue, guys. follow me." nendou followed without any further questions but saiki and kaidou were a bit apprehensive. all three of them watched as kuboyasu stood shoulder-to-shoulder with the guard by one of the doors, muttering something in the man's ear, causing him to sweatdrop and hesitantly open the door with a shaky smile; allowing all four of them inside. "woah, that was awesome, aren!" kaidou yelled, not only out of awe but so he could be heard over all the cheering, laughing and game noises from inside the arcade. "yeah, that was so cool! but what did you say to that guy? he looked freaked out!" nendou inquired, surprising saiki with his actually intelligent observation. kuboyasu's hand found it's way behind his neck, rubbing it awkwardly as he chuckled, "oh, nothing! it's not important-- hey! how about you guys start playing your games and i'll go get the tickets we reserved, yeah?" "yeah!" kaidou and nendou cheered in unison, high-fiving the purple-haired boy before the all ran off in different directions, leaving saiki standing alone at the entrance. he fidgeted with his germanium ring, contemplating taking it off as he stared at kuboyasu; he really wanted to know what the teen boy could've said that'd incite such fear into a grown man, but he decided against it — merrily making his way towards the claw machines, leaving kuboyasu's secrets alone. ★★★★★★★★★★ "shit." he cursed under his breath as he watched the cyborg cider man plushie that he's been trying to win — for yuuta — for half an hour straight slip out of his grasp once again. 'these things are rigged. and what's the point in having psychic superpowers if i can't use them.' he thought to himself but had to quickly shake off the idea, as there was no way he could risk using his powers in such a crowded place, especially for a plush that wasn't even for himself but rather for an annoying kid. he sighed, slipping another coin into the slot and about to find the right state of mind until he heard a loud "fuck!"  from in front of him. his head jerked up, scanning the area for the source of the noise until his eyes landed on you. the claw machines were lined up, back-to-back, and playing on the machine diagonal from him was a girl with enchanting (e/c) eyes which contrasted greatly with her disheartened expression as she stared at the box. the only emotion she wore was sadness as she stared at the machine, so out of curiosity, saiki slipped off his ring in order to read her thoughts; feeling no guilt in listening to the affairs of a complete stranger. 'c'mon, stupid claw machine, i need this!' your silky yet whiny voice rung through his mind, 'what's she gonna think about me tomorrow when i tell her that i couldn't get her the gift she's wanted? she's gonna hate me- even more than she already does. and now i've spent all my money on this silly game so i can't even try get her a crappy gift with the little money i had. Wow, (y/n), you're the worst big sister in existence.' saiki cocked his head to the side, peering through the glass of the machines to see the contents of the claw machine you were standing in front of and when he saw the limited edition, silver cyborg cider man action figure sitting on a pedestal — almost as if it was taunting the poor girl — he finally connected the dots. your hand dug through your pockets until you found the smooth metal surface of your final coin, 'just once more try. if i win her this action figure, maybe she'll finally respect me as her big sister! and this toy will surely make her more happy than any gift mom could've possibly thought of. i'll make her sixth birthday one to remember!' the dejected look on your face slow lifted into a determined one, but it wasn't very convincing as saiki — and anyone else — could see the worry and shame in your eyes as you dropped your last coin into the slot of the machine, giving you one more chance to redeem yourself and claim the title of 'best big sister in the world'. saiki watched you maneuver the claw of the machine with bated breath, admiring how your pretty nose crinkled and your tongue poked out from the corners of your perfectly glossed lips in concentration — 'ew, stop being a simp, kusuo.' he mentally rebuked himself before engaging with your scene one again. your fist slammed down against the big red button, followed by the claw opening and lowering over the box of the cyborg cider man action figure, slowly closing it's jaws around the box and grasping it perfectly, resulting in a slight gasp to escape your throat as your lips pulled into a grin. the claw kept it's grip in the toy as it lifted up, slowly making it's way over the hole where it would drop the action figure, straight into your possession.  that is, if the grip didn't falter hence allowing the toy to fall down, off it's pedestal and onto the bottom of the compartment to join the rest of the more average action figures. "fuck!" you screamed in an almost identical way to which you did earlier, expect this one held more pain. 'this can't be happening; is this the third year in a row that i'm going to show up to my little sister's birthday party empty-handed?' you thought, your bottom lips quivering so you quickly bit down on it, staring at the damned toy before turning on your heels, shuffling away from the game with your head hung low, the thoughts which cried in your head about how much you budgeted and how hard you worked made saiki's heart sink. 'maybe i could take out a mortga--' your thoughts were abruptly cut off when you heard the noise of something falling behind you. whipping your head around to see what happened, you exhaled a sigh of relief upon seeing nothing out of the ordinary. however, you caught a glimpse of inside the machine which you had been cursing at and realised that the toy wasn't with the packaging peanuts where you left it, as if it magically disappeared in the few seconds you had averted your gaze. creeping up to it, your gaze darted around in search of anyone who might've won it in less than 5 seconds but that was unlikely. now that you were closer, you peered through the glass once more to confirm that the toy was in fact missing and you were right. recalling the noise of falling you heard just before you turned around, you dropped to your knees and lifted the flap to the compartment which held the good that people would win from the machine. you almost screamed with delight and shock when you laid eyes on the limited edition, cyborg cider man action figure that was tucked snugly inside. yanking it out, you pressed it to your chest and the tears you were choking back finally came running down your cheeks, but now they were from joy. "thank you, god." you whispered to yourself, making saiki chuckle from his spot at the claw machine which he hadn't moved from. he wasn't god — nor was he friends with god — but he didn't mind not being able to take the credit for his kind actions of using his psychokinesis to drop the box into the hole for you. honestly, he found that seeing you happy, sitting on the floor with brightest beam gracing your features along with your now cheerful thoughts in his head, was enough of a reward for him anyway. also, he appreciated how you didn't question how the box ended up in the hole and instead you just deemed it a miracle as you were too overjoyed to use logic; that sort of thinking saved saiki a lot of trouble. 'i should probably go home and wrap this.' your internal monologue had now calmed down slightly as you were now able to produce a thought that wasn't just a squeal of delight, 'hm, maybe once i am done i could come back and see the new movie that's premiering-- but i've not got much money left so i guess i shouldn't get ahead of myself.' you hummed, picking up the box along with yourself, dusting yourself off before heading towards the exit. saiki must've been staring for a tad too long though as you caught his gaze while brushing off your clothes. he cringed, instinctively darting his eyes away so you didn't think he was an ogling creep but the fact he appeared defensive probably didn't help. so he fully expected you to frown or cast him a dirty look, judging him for his actions but to his surprise, you simply chuckled. waving at the pink-haired boy before strolling off with the box under your arm. 'he seems cool. where i can get clips like those?' why were you thoughts making him blush like an idiot? time to put the germanium ring back on. ★★★★★★★★★★ as it turns out, nendou is surprisingly good at poker. he figured this out after he stumbled across the casino section of the arcade, and since he looks way older than seventeen, nobody questions it when he took a seat at one of the slot machines, under the impression that it was a fancy, old-timey arcade game. he was then offered a round of poker with some old dude with way too many gold teeth and nendou ended up taking the poor, stubborn guy's entire fortune. god-knows how many games with how-many people later, nendou was sitting on stacks of cash at a round table with a tired dealer, and two grown men — one crying into the shoulder of his arm-candy and the other weeping into the sleeve of his suit — while the three boys who had came to give him his ticket stood by, all wearing matching confused expressions. "uh, nendou." kuboyasu tapped his friend on the shoulder, waving the ticket in front of his face, "the movie is gonna start soon, we should start heading over there right now so we can buy snacks and get good seats." nendou raised an eyebrow, puzzled until he recalled that he was supposed to watch a movie today, "oh, that sounds cool and all but i'm having a lot of fun right here." he smiled, motioning to the large casino area. kuboyasu chuckled awkwardly, backing away from nendou slightly as he turned on his heels, ushering the two other boys away, "alright, well, have fun, nendou! don't stay out too late!" nendou sung an okay in response, sliding a kaidou some cash for the extortionate theatre snacks before he was rushed away by kuboyasu, the purple-haried boy not wanting to spend anymore time in the casino than needed. "if nendou isn't joining us for the movie then we have a spare ticket. here, saiki, you should have it!" "why me?" "uh, because you said you saw reita earlier. so if you see him again maybe you could offer him the spare ticket." 'absolutely not.' was vocalised as "sure." by saiki as he took the ticket from kuboyasu's outstretched hand, fiddling with it before stuffing it into his pocket along with his own ticket. "what i said to nendou was kinda an exaggeration" aren mused, glancing at his watch before looking up at his two pals, "we still have some time left before the movie starts. i'm gonna go handle some business — you two have fun, and try find reita!" kuboyasu said before pivoting on his heels in the direction of the staff only closet. the only thing saiki could think to do during this free-time was escape kaidou's pestering to play dance dance revolution — since saiki didn't want to dance, dance or revolute, he darted outside as soon as kuboyasu left, leaving kaidou alone and confused in the middle of the arcade. 'finally, fresh air.' saiki inhaled, filling his lungs with the cool air rather than the stuffy, arcade oxygen. scanning the surrounding area, his eyes caught a glimpse of a figure standing by the ATM, which he immediately recognised to be that of the girl he had helped earlier. so naturally, he flicked of his ring to figure out the reasoning behind the awkward look on her face. 'do i really want to withdraw money to see some stupid movie? i mean, i could leave that money to accumulate and buy something nicer later.' without thinking, saiki hummed in agreement with your thoughts as he had been in your position many times before. 'but then again, i should treat myself! when was the last time i saw a movie that wasn't pirated? hmm..' your indecisive thoughts matched perfectly with your conflicted expression as you stared through furrowed brows at the screen of the ATM. a soft breeze passed, followed by something light smacking against you face. you winced slightly, your hand snapping your cheek and grabbing at whatever it was; just by the texture, you could tell it was paper. holding it in front of you, upon further inspection you realised that the mysterious sheet that had flew into your possession was in fact a ticket to tonight's showing of 'Olfana's Story X-2'  row G, seat 9. you double, triple checked it out of fear that this may be a cruel prank but no, this was completely real! you cheered, bouncing up and down and away from the ATM since you no longer needed it's services as god had blew the desired item straight into your hands — or your face, rather. either way though, you were over the moon, clutching the ticket to your chest and basking in your second miracle of the day. unbeknownst to you, saiki's smile was almost as wide as your own. you thanked god for your relief and saiki had no problem with that; seeing your little happy dance and squeals with your free ticket was enough for him. but actually, perhaps he might benefit himself after all, since the ticket he had given you previous belonged to nendou. meaning that saiki was seated at row G, seat 10; right beside you. ★★★★★★★★★★ saiki forgot to send a few notes flying your way in the wind, so you walked into the theatre and took your seat, completely snackless since you couldn't afford the exorbitant prices that they sold food for at the cinema. but perhaps that wasn't all bad as it revealed the possibility for saiki to offer you some of his popcorn as a conversation-starter, as he's usually not too good at socialising with new people — forget starting a conversation. however, he didn't need to work up any sort of courage to talk to you as the first thing you did when you plopped down in your seat beside him was turn to him and chirp, "oh, you're the guy i saw at the claw machines earlier! i love your clip thingies." your buoyant-adrenaline allowing your to be more bold than usual. the movie had yet to start, low murmurs of chatter coming from across the theatre as the trailers played in the background, "yes. and thanks." 'good grief, curse myself for not being more talkative. she probably thinks i'm dull now. perhaps i should channel my inner nendou..if i have one.' instead of ending the conversation right there like he assumed you would, you continued talking and saiki was..glad? why did he want to interact with you so much? he spends most of his days trying to avoid interacting with people; why were you any different? "no problem- also, did you get what you were playing for?" you inquired, tapping your lip in genuine curiosity. his ring remained on his finger, despite the fact he wanted to know what you thought about him, he didn't want to invade your privacy any more than he already has. "no. did you?" "yeah, i did, actually!" you chirped, not noticing the smirk creeping onto saiki's lips as you were too engulfed in your memories, "i thought those games were rigged but maybe they're not 'cause i managed to win this super special action figure that my sister has been on the top of my sister's wishlist for like- forever! and her birthday is tomorrow so i'll be a--" you cut yourself off, crinkling your nose in embarrassment, "sorry, i'm over-sharing, aren't i?" your enthusiasm made his heart flutter in a way he wasn't used to, if you didn't know any better, he would have thought he was having a medical emergency. his eyes widened slightly as you halted in your speech, "no, you're fine." he said, the uncharacteristic softness in his voice catching the attention of his two pals sitting on the other side of him. you shook off his comment, "i mean, i'm telling you my life story and i don't even know your name." you said, laughing sheepishly at the reality of the reality of the situation. 

“saiki kusuo.” he blurted out without a second thought.

you blinked a few times, shocked that he’d give his details away so easily as you somewhat expected him to be more of a reserved type of guy but evidently, you were wrong. “uh, i’m (l/n) (y/n).” you choked, biting down on your bottom lip slightly before continuing you story as he seemed to wait expectantly, “as i was saying, today’s just been the best day ever! everything has been going so well, i’m a bit scared as to what is going to happen when it hits midnight.” 

saiki nodded along, popping a piece of popcorn into his mouth before remembering his plan, “oh- would you like some?” he asked, offering you some popcorn from his bucket. unfortunately, the plan was a last-minute thing so he had only bought a small, but he still wasn’t opposed to sharing. 

you shook your head, trying to grin foolishly wide at his kind offer, “no thank you.” 

saiki nodded, about to open his mouth to reply until the blaring music from the beginning of the movie started, putting a swift end to your conversation — despite the fact saiki would much rather talk to you than watch the crappy movie — out of theatre etiquette. 

★★★★★★★★★★

it was worse than you or saiki could’ve ever imagined.

it was painfully trying not to burst out laughing right in middle of it or lean over and giggle in each other’s ear at the silly dialog but out of respect for the other people in the cinema, you both stayed silent and just cast each other occasional knowing glances whenever something cringey happened on screen. 

you both let out audible sighs of relief with the credits began to roll, accompanied by a slow indie song. “that was..something.” you mumbled, grabbing your purse and jumping to your feet, wanting to exit the building as soon as possible and hopefully leave your memories of the movie behind you. 

“definitely.” he snickered, absently flicking the side of his empty popcorn bucket, “i stopped paying attention once i finished my popcorn.” it felt weird to vocalise — or rather, telepathically communicate — the comments he’d usually keep to himself; why did he feel so comfortable speaking to someone he only just met?

he began gathering his things, stuffing all of his rubbish in the bucket so he could dispose of it all at once. his mind was fixated on crappiness of the movie and how a five-year-old could’ve shot a much better film, until you grabbed his attention by calling out his name, followed by a question which made him blood run cold.

“before i go, it gotta ask’ how’d you do it? or more importantly, why’d you do it?”

he blinked several times before putting on his best bewildered expression, with the idea that maybe if he played dumb, he could gaslight you into thinking that it never happened or that he had nothing to do with it. “what?”

“oh, don’t give me that!” you scoffed, narrowing your eyes at the boy, “i’m not stupid. every time something good happened to me, you were nearby. i’ve connected the dots so fess up. why did you do all those nice things for me? was it out of pity or are you that nice to everyone?”

“i’m that nice to everyone.”

“i don’t believe you.” you snapped, fixing your tone when you remembered that even though he was lying to you, he still helped you get the present for you sister and gave you his spare ticket. “i don’t care if you’re not gonna give me a straight answer, but at least let me make it up to you.”

he huffed, an unimpressed look covering his features before you even proposed your idea. there was really nothing he could possibly need from you. what were you going to give him that he wasn’t capable of obtaining on his own? so he frowned, ready to decline your offer. 

“i saw that you bought one of those jelly pots from the snack stand and i actually work at a little café in the town, so i might be able to get you few things for free or discounted?”

“yes.” wait, that wasn’t refusal. 

“great!” you chirped, glad that you wouldn’t have to pry further, “does later this week sounds good? we could meet up here then i can walk you to the café- or i could give you my number and we can arrange a date later?” 

“sure.” saiki said without thinking once again.

but it wasn’t as though he regretted it when you slipped the piece of paper you had scribbled your number onto, into the front pocket of his shirt, tapping it with a smile. “alright! i’ll see you later then- unless you want to walk home with me?” you fidgeted with your fingers slightly, instantly regretting what you just came out with. not because you didn’t want to walk with him, but due to the fact you highly doubted he was going so say accept so you mentally prepared for the impact of his harsh rejection.

“sure.”

★★★★★★★★★★

BONUS 

saiki ended up walking home with some girl he met at the theatre so that left kuboyasu and kaidou to fetch nendou once the film finished. they both searched the casino area for almost half an hour but neither of them had any luck finding nendou. that was, until kuboyasu had to take a step outside to escape the casino as he noticed an old friend of his playing on the slot machines, and he found nendou crouched by the garbage cans, on his phone. 

“nendou! we’ve been looking all over for you- why are you out here by the trash? and what happened to all your money?!”

nendou chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck with his spare hand, “fun story actually. i was doing so well and i was on my way to becoming a millionaire until these schoolgirls came marching in and absolutely slaughtered me! it was so embarrassing and the only way i could escape them was by running away so i hid back here.”

kuboyasu’s aura just screamed ‘disappointed but not surprised’, “so you’re telling me that you lost millions to highschool girls?”

“they might’ve been middle-schoolers, i’m not too sure. i didn’t get a very good look at ‘em but they were all wearing creepy red uniforms.”

all kuboyasu could do was massage his temples to ease his headache at the stupidity of his friends, “so you lost all your money to school girls in creepy red uniforms?” he repeated aloud, just to make sure he was hearing things correctly.

“yes. but not all my money.” he said, pulling out his wallet and grandly opening it to reveal a few notes and a button, “i’ve still got enough to spend on ramen with my bros!”

[saikikreacts]

Saiki K characters react to you breaking into their house to give them zumba lessons

inspired by this post

Saiki: Zumba? Good grief... *teleports you into the middle of the Atlantic Ocean*

Kaidou: Why have you broken into my house? Could it be... you’re a member of the Jet Black Wings? Zumba, you say...? Gah, cease this such irrelevant talk, and prepare for battle with me! I will prepare in private... *runs to his sister’s room and calls the police*

Nendo: Oh hell yeah buddy let’s do it! *starts dancing* 

Teruhashi: ah well.. Zumba isn’t something I do that often... but I’ll give it a try!

*Your inner thoughts* She really is the perfect woman... 

Chiyo: Sorry, I don’t do well with personal trainers... Unless it’s Kaidou-kun...

Aren: What the hell? Get the fuck out of my house

Akechi: Hmm, how did you get into my house? Did you break through the window, perhaps? No, I didn’t hear the sound of glass breaking and I can’t see any trace of it on your shoes. Judging by the situation and the fact that you’re now asking me to participate in a Zumba lesson with you, I’ll have to assume that you’re here by some paradoxical situation, most likely played for laughs. Well? Is this funny? I talk a lot, don’t I, is that what passes for comedy for most people? I see, while we’re on the subject, I might as well mention it. I would assume you’re not even qualified to teach Zumba. Did you know that Zumba was originally a program created by Colombian dancer and choreographer Alberto “Beto” Pérez during the 1990s, and that it’s trademarked by Zumba fitness LLC? I don’t think you do, judging by the fact you’re currently avoiding my gaze; well, based off of that information alone, technically you shouldn’t be trying to hold a Zumba class at all, I can tell by your muscle tone that you’re inexperienced and I doubt you’re skilled enough to be em

Aiura: Nice try, i go to Zumba classes every weekend and you don’t look like my instructor

Hairo: Are you sure Zumba is the right choice for your body type? You look like running would benefit you more! For example, the ideal exercise for my body type is an aerobic workout circuit! *drops to the floor and starts doing pushups*

Mera: What’s Zumba? If it’s not something I can eat, I’m not interested

Toritsuka: I was born for this! *channels the spirit of Beto Pérez*

Bonus: Kusuke

Ahaha.. You must have been sent by Kusuo, to get past my defences so easily. Well, if he thinks I’m going to lose to him over something as silly as this, he’s wrong. *puts on power suit and starts dancing aggressively*

[oceanwithouthermoon]

hi you will understand my view

saiki has a lot of boxes full of shopkins and miniature things in general

one day in the middle of a hang out w the gang they're bored in his room and he pulls out one of this bad bitches

ignore the low quality 😭

FUCKKKK YESSS. I DO. I DO UNDERSTAND.

there needs to be like a masterlist of kusuos fixations/special interests LOL but mini things is definitely one of them.. i like to imagine him with a little dollhouse full of shopkins and other mini things so he can shrink down to their size and hangout inside.. sorry that's so silly but i love it LMAO imagine his parents walking into his room and hes in a little mini hammock in a barbie dreamhouse..

omg kusuo writes in a diary but nobody can read it because its mini and he writes in it when hes tiny..

sorry im gonna keep adding my own stupid things to this but. some of his other fixations include zelda, my little pony, mario kart, hot wheels, stuffed animals, the frozen movies (specific ik), vocaloid (pjsk)..

remember how he made his dads figurine move like a real robo-suit when he was in it ? that but with hot WHEELS and those little mario kart figures oh my GOD. sorry.

i still believe that all of the objects and collections he's accumulated because of his fixations are all in hidden places around his room because he's embarrassed of them since like. collecting cute plushies and shopkins isnt a thing the average teenage boy would do. like his closet and the space underneath his bed or even boxes underneath his desk are like portals to another fucking world bro.

[metalandmagi]

January Media Madness

It’s a new year, and yes I’m still keeping track of the stuff I watch and/or read. I really just like being able to keep track of everything that came out during the year, and I like to shout my thoughts into the void. And maybe someone will find something they like.

Movies!

The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals: Okay, not a movie, but it’s the latest musical from Starkid so I had to include it somewhere. And this time it’s a horror alien/zombie take over that causes everyone to act like they’re in a musical, and humanity’s only hope is an average guy who happens to not like musicals. That may not sound bad, BUT THINK OF THE IMPLICATIONS! The plot could sort of meander at times, but it’s hilarious and also pretty dark for Starkid. If nothing else, watch it because Lauren Lopez is a goddess. 9/10

Monty Python and the Holy Grail: Everyone’s favorite silly King Arthur searching for the holy grail story. I hadn’t watched this movie since I was a kid, and there was so much stuff I forgot about! And yeah it’s still pretty great. I do feel like it drags in the middle a little, but I still always enjoy the tomfoolery! 9/10

Three Identical Strangers: A documentary about a set of identical triplets who were separated at birth and the sinister intentions of the adoption agency who separated them. On top of being an interesting story, it is super thought provoking bringing up questions of scientific morality, nature vs nurture, and mental health...which does make it a little depressing. I love the way it sets up the mystery of the story, but it also makes you feel terrible for trying to plot out and guess the story of these actual human beings’ lives. So I’d recommend it to anyone who is interested in crazy stories and scientific corruption! 9/10

Venom: A classic tale of a boy and his symbiote. In which the weirdest investigative reporter in the world is possessed by an alien parasite while trying to stop a corrupt corporation from constantly murdering people. Guys, I originally never planned to see this movie. I never cared about Venom. I was never big into the Spiderman universe, but then this movie came out and everyone was saying how weird it was...and how Eddie and Venom are like a thing...so curiosity got the better of me. And I’m kind of underwhelmed. I think I would have liked it more if I never had any expectations going into it, because it really wasn’t as weird as I thought it would be. The first 30 minutes were a slog, the dialogue was clunky, the plot was very predictable and basic, and I feel like Eddie and Venom didn’t have enough interaction. But it had its moments, I get why some people love it, and I did like what I saw of the symbiote relationship, so all in all it was just..okay. Oh well. 6.5/10

Mama Mia Here We Go Again: The just as ridiculous sequel to Mama Mia, featuring more dumb plots that don’t fit together, more dumb writing, and more over the top performances. Just like the first one, it’s a silly excuse to put some ABBA songs in a movie and make you have fun, and it accomplishes that in spades. Because if you’re watching a Mama Mia movie for the “plot” or anything other than the musical numbers and silliness, you’re making a huge mistake. It is a little clunkier trying to weave two timelines together, but who cares because they’re singing Dancing Queen! As an actual movie, we all know it’s barely passable as a 6/10 but just for getting drunk with your friends and having fun it’s a 9/10

Books!

The Horse and His Boy by C.S. Lewis: The fifth/third book in the Chronicles of Narnia in which a boy and a talking horse run away from the land of Calormen to get to Narnia...and find out about a plot to take over Narnia along the way. I know some people think this is the most interesting book in the series plot wise, and technically there is more plot...but it’s boring as hell. I really think Lewis’s normal interjections would have made it more entertaining, but he doesn’t use his author’s voice at all! Not only is it written in an incredibly circular and drawn out way (some people literally tell stories like they’re writing the bible), but it’s also SUPER RACIST and kind of sexist too. I was so excited because when the book first started I thought we were getting a canonical protagonist of color...and then he turns out to be a kidnapped white boy surrounded by “savages.” Yes we have Aravis...but I really don’t know how to feel about her. Also Bree the horse is really just an asshole, so it’s hard to like any of the characters. I did appreciate having adult Edmund and Susan around though, so it’s not a total waste. The truth is, this is the book that I could barely get through as a kid and would constantly fall asleep reading so I barely remembered anything besides the fact that I didn’t like it. 3/10

Skyward by Brandon Sanderson: In a distant future, humans are trapped on a wasteland planet where their only hope for survival are teenagers flying spaceships while fighting a mysterious alien race. Aka: local girl is constantly dumped on by society and makes friends with a talking spaceship. Okay this book definitely has its problems, but I mostly don’t care because 1. The world building is great. 2. Spensa is a fun main character. 3. All the side characters have distinguishable personalities and interactions *cough* m-bot *cough*. And 4. The plot could be predictable at times but I really liked following the mystery of it all...even if there’s some weird chosen one type of bullshit going on towards the end. It has a major season one Attack on Titan vibe with all the questions about humanity’s history and mankind uniting to fight a mysterious enemy. This is a super fun read that kept me theorizing and was also incredibly motivational. Did I like all of Sanderson’s decisions when it came to which characters died? Hell no. Do I think the government would have a lot more backlash considering its dumbass way of fighting wars? Yes. But I’d still recommend it, and I’m still looking forward to the next book! 8/10

TV Shows!

Aggretsuko: The most adorable musical comedy anime of 2018, where Retsuko, a 25 year old office worker is getting fed up with her job and copes with life by singing aggressive death metal songs...and by the way everyone’s a cute animal. I’m a little late to this party, but this show is so precious and also disturbingly accurate to real life. Retsuko is so relatable, Haida’s crush on her is well executed and not forced, there’s great working women solidarity (Gori and Washimi are the fucking queens of anime side characters) and the metal is so well integrated! Please watch this charming show and the Christmas special if you haven’t already! I NEED ANOTHER SEASON NOW! 10/10

A Series of Unfortunate Events (season 3): The final season of the Baudelaires’ tale of misery and woe. And man did they stick the landing. “But it doesn’t leave things vague enough, they didn’t leave the sugar bowl a mystery.” GOOD! I’ve had to deal with Snicket’s badly written ending to the books since 2006. I love that they explained as much as they did. The ending was bittersweet and more concrete while still delivering the message of how the world is morally gray. Also Quigley was amazing, Sunny was amazing, FERNALD WAS AMAZING! KIT WAS AMAZING! EVERYONE WAS AMAZING! And I almost cried seeing the kids in their outfits from the book covers. I wish Jacqueline was in it, but I think her character would have felt redundant with Kit in the mix. This was an amazing adaption all around, and this season did a great job at putting some of the more...difficult books on screen without it feeling out of place. Even if you haven’t read the books, I encourage anyone who likes mysteries and different forms of storytelling to suffer with the rest of us! 10/10

The Disastrous Life of Saiki K (season 1): Local overpowered psychic anime boy just wants to be ignored and blend in with society, but the universe constantly surrounds him with silly situations that cause him to use his powers. I finally got around to watching this show, and it’s hilarious. Kusuo is a great deadpan main character who is definitely ace as hell, and the English dub is actually pretty good! I don’t really want to watch the show in Japanese now because I feel like the dub does a better job at timing the comedic lines and distinguishing everyone’s thoughts. So now I’m upset that the second season hasn’t been dubbed (thanks Netflix). But yeah it’s a great silly show to binge watch. 10/10

Community: The misadventures of a wacky study group going to the world’s worst community college. You know, the one with all the memes? Okay, I know I’m the last one to watch this and  technically I still have a season and a half left at this point, but I thought I’d include it anyway. This show is such a wild ride that I don’t even know what to think about it anymore. The first two seasons were pretty average with a few absolutely brilliant episodes thrown in. And then...the paintball episodes happened, and the show just became amazing. I do have a lot of questions though....like if the main character is a lawyer (sort of), why does he never sue the dean for sexual harassment? Why does Pierce, the resident old, sexist, racist, problematic baby boomer have an “arc” centered around a logical fallacy. No one wants to hang out with him because he’s terrible, but he’s upset because he feels left out and constantly does terrible things to get back at them? I literally almost dropped the show because I couldn’t take him anymore, and then the writers just magically dial him back in his last seasons...which I’m thankful for. And I don’t even know where to being with Chang. BUT this show is a testament to creative writing and innovative meta ways to tell stories. The rest of the study group is made up of hilarious well balanced characters that all have their distinct broken but quirky personalities. And I love them all...except Pierce. So, even though I haven’t finished it, I’d give it an 8.5/10 so far.

Superstore: A sitcom about the daily struggles of workers in a W*lmart-esque superstore. I finally caught up to it, and it’s still fine. It’s not great, but not terrible either. It is incredibly accurate though, coming from someone who works retail. The best parts of the show are the scene transitions because they show all the things customers are doing in the store. And most of the time I just nod and go “yeah I’ve seen that.” This is one of those shows to have on for the sake of just having something on. It has its moments. 7/10

Honorable Mentions

Because these are the reasons why I didn’t really read much this month...or watch many movies.

YOUNG JUSTICE is officially back with the long awaited season 3. And it’s still pretty great, but man I wish I had rewatched the original series.

Netflix released the Taylor Swift Reputation stadium performance. So now you all know how much of a slut for Taylor Swift I am. I can’t help it if her latest album is basically Captive Prince the musical!

The Masked Singer (US version) is dragging me into a spiral of conspiracy theories. Please watch this ridiculous reality show where celebrities wear elaborate costumes and a super annoying judging panel tries to guess who they are. I’m in hell, because this show is set up terribly, but I also don’t want to leave.

Life is Strange 2: episode 2 was finally released. And I’m actually loving it. These games have a special place in my heart for some reason.

New Super Mario Bros U Deluxe came out and I hate myself for buying these stupid games because they consume all my time, and I don’t even really like them.