#said this before i mean on my blog that was deactivated and i remember getting vv happy anytime someone rbed it bc i always like

[fionaapplesmackdown]

said this before but being bad at things will always be soooo endearing and beautiful and whimsical To Me like gosh you're so bad at this thing you're learning for the first time what a wonder!! what a curious individual with a lust for life you are what a lust for life!!!!! and if this isn't your first time and yet you're still bad at it how lovely too! your enjoyment doesn't come from being the best or even being good but just the participation of such a thing!!!!?!??? what a fucking lust for fucking life!

[funnyburneracct]

Hi, I'm Xiao/burningrqs. this post is going to be long. Posting this from a burner so that it doesn't go down the drain when we deactivate.

But essentially, this is an apology to the radqueer community for multiple different things. I'm going to do my best to type this out as well as possible, and I apologize if I miss anything or word things poorly. I am going to explain myself to the best of my abilities, but please keep in mind that my explanations do not excuse my actions by any means.

Post under the cut.

for those who don't want to read it though, TL;DR: I was a complete asshole and I'm genuinely very sorry about it.

So, I want to start off by apologizing in general for the "burning radqueers" thing. Not only was it just not funny, but it was also really weird. I know damn well that if I saw someone pop up with a "burningmogais" blog or something, I would be pissed. So I don't know what made me think that running burningradqueers was a good idea in any sense.

My rude and dehumanizing comments did not help. Regardless of how I view people, what disorders I have, or how symptoms present themselves, it was disgusting of me to act as though I can't be held accountable for my cruelty towards others.

The targeted posts were even worse, and allowing people to just pick a random blog to "burn" was teetering on harassment. It put the user in front of so many people who clearly did not have good intentions towards them, and inherently put the user being "burnt" in danger. I wish I noticed that fact sooner. Even if I disagreed with people or didn't like them for whatever reason, I still should not have felt as though I had the right to post stuff like that.

Adding onto that, I should have never used my ASPD as an excuse for anything. I tend to get defensive when I feel insulted, which is what happened, and I decided to bite back despite being in the wrong. I acted impulsively and out of pure anger, and then tried to defend it, which I shouldn't have. When saying the kinds of things I did, I am open to criticism whether I like that fact or not, and trying to act as though I am immune to that criticism because of a disorder was disgusting on my part.

Another thing, somewhat on a similar note, is that an apology is owed for my hostility in general. Every time it was even lightly suggested I was wrong, I seemed to lash out and get angry. This really just comes down to me needing to learn to admit my wrongs. I should not have made my inability to understand my wrongdoings anyone else's problem.

Then there's also the things I said when I lashed out before deciding to drop burningradqueers entirely. I don't fully remember all of what I said as the event happened during an episode (this does not excuse my words at all by the way. regardless of my state at the time, what I said wasn't okay and should not be excused) and the posts have since been deleted. But, I do remember at one point making harassment out to be a competition of sorts when someone was simply trying to calmly explain to my why the namedropping was not a good move. I can't for the life of me remember why I did that, but I am very sorry about it. A lot of people in the radqueer community have been harassed (and likely do still get harassed constantly), and for me to act like I am the only victim of harassment was wrong on multiple levels.

I'm sure there was a lot of bad stuff I said during that episode, but as I said, I do not remember most of it. I'm sorry that I can't apologize for the specific things I said, but I am apologizing for the situation as a whole.

The entire thing started over me not being able to handle much deserved criticism, and I stood "my ground" despite having absolutely no ground to stand on.

I started burningradqueers over baseless hatred. I didn't know why I was supposed to hate radqueers, or what I was even really hating. I joined the anti community thinking that it is much easier to just move with the pack and hate what everyone else seems to hate, but hatred really isn't that easy. It's exhausting. And realizing how much the anti community really wouldn't want me if I was honest about things made me realize that. Realizing that there are so many antis who would rather see us suffer forever due to dysphoria than see us live happily after getting amputations was rough, and honestly kinda gave me a taste of what radqueers have to deal with every single day, and it felt horrible.

Without realizing it, I managed to do so much damage to a community full of people who deal with exactly the same things I do, a community that is mostly traumatized and mentally ill people who are just trying to get by. Not even just that, but genuinely just people trying to exist and be honest about themselves.

It is not my place to dictate what is and isn't valid in terms of someone's personal identity, and even more, it's not okay for me to treat a whole community like garbage just because I didn't understand it.

Again, I do not want my actions to be excused. I treated people horribly and was a total dick, but I hope that me apologizing can at least make some of you feel better about how I behaved.

[ilyuu-archive]

update!

get ready folks this is a rollercoaster of emotions but uh, just to put this out here, it isn’t exactly good news

alright, so i think i’m gonna go ahead and quit writing for this blog. yeah, not exactly the best start to this - you think as a writer i’d know what words to use.

before anything - nope, i am not going to deactivate my blog, next best thing is to archive it since there’s so many memories that i like to at least keep, of my moots and of just a lot of things in general that i like to memorialize and a lot of writings and posts.

i want to keep them here because i want someone, whoever comes across it, to read whichever one and feel some semblance of comfort; that’s the main reason why i made this blog in the first place and that’s how i intend to leave it.

oh uh, yeah, for the reasons why i’m quitting, i can technically list a few :

genshin burnout : i don’t feel as strongly as i do for the game anymore, not as excited, even as fontaine was released, and stopped playing it a few months back. so, y’know, as genshin-centric this blog is, it’s technically a bit hard to try and get into something that you long lost interest for.

school : it’s catching me off-guard every time and even though i found a rhythm with my classes and schedule, it’s only asking for more of my time and, quite literally demanding. i’ll be honest and say that i can’t juggle a blog with a post every day and stay consistent with my schoolwork and what’s expected of me. i need to start thinking about my future.

spiraling thoughts : yup, you read that right; i’m back at it again with me thinking that my writing isn’t good enough and am doubting my skills as a writer as a whole, especially with my way of writing that as his poetic touch to it that’s making me wonder if it’s even worth anything at all.

with that, i think i just need to start writing for myself again because i haven’t felt that feeling for literally a while now.

have i thought about this for a while now? i have actually, somewhere in the middle of august but i was really, really hesitant for a lot of reasons.

said reasons being mainly my moots. i don’t like the ideas of leaving any of them behind at all, especially with them being the main reason why i love opening this app every day, seeing them flood my dash with everything that happened the night before, saying good morning, and seeing them in my notifs and inbox with their chaos and genuineness. i have so many memories here that i consider so dear to me because of each and every one of them, making my day and night, and… i don’t know, it’d suck to lose all of them.

@mikacynth : you were my first moot and i know i’ve mentioned and said this so many times to the point that you’d probably get sick of it but it did and does mean a lot to me knowing that you opened a door for me to meet so many others that made writing and just being on here amazing. you’re just so damn cool, creative, and nice and i’m so, so happy that i met you.

@floraldresvi : i don’t remember how i met you, and i’m so sorry for that vi, but you’re the kindest, absolutely gentle and attentive person i know and i just wonder how i ever got the chance to talk to you and be moots. i wish you nothing but the best because that’s all you deserve and more and you better keep that in mind vi.

@st0pthatsgay : this was a strangers to friends to lovers arc fr!! sorry i couldn’t help that, do you know how long i wanted to make that joke? but seriously, oli, you and your unbridled chaos and energy never fails to make my dash and quite literally everyone else who follows you like a rom-com movie or something; i’m so glad that i can call you a moot and one that i cherish so, so much.

@papiliotao : rei, you made my day whenever you drop in one of your small blurbs into my inbox and i get the space to just write whatever comes to mind; it was a little thing we had and, i don’t know, i loved it. i love it still a lot. it was like a duo we had and always made me smile with whatever we talked about, maybe just about writing in general or the cats that you always see. i’m just sorry that we won’t be able to have our wedding soon. really.

@supernova25 : bestie, i still remember those times about the ai bots!! i still think about them a lot!! it was fun!! in general, you’re always a lot of fun to talk to, and it could be about anything and it’d fly off the roof. also your asks about the most random of things has definitely made me feel better on my worst of days just to put that out there.

@soleillunne : i’d make a joke about you running up for the title of creator of angst and all that but you’ve always been so sweet so let me just push that aside, considerate as well; don’t think i didn’t see you send me links of anything scaramouche related because i do and i appreciate that so much

@hollythius-rising : YOU AND YOUR THEME CHANGES DON’T THINK I DON’T NOTICE THEM you’re also very very sweet and chaotic when it comes to your taste in tall purple men in lab coats but we don’t talk about that aosjksjs just that it’s always been a pleasure to talk to you whenever we have the chance to

@mondaymelon : YOU. we vibe with each other a lot like radio waves and it got me all giddy, and i’d just drop a lot of memes into your inbox just so i could see how you’d react only for you to give me a taste of my own medicine when you do the same thing 100 times more effectiveaisjsjs

@venusflwers : those late nights of playing roblox with you makes me feel so, so happy, you have no idea. it’s filled with crack with whatever you say and you somehow make a horror game feel like some comedy instead i swear; you’re literally the most unhinged and funniest person i met and i love that about you so much

@kazumist : it’s like a parent watching their kid grow up and then completely surpass them in terms of height. yeah, that’s you akiaki!! always frothing over your writing, your drabbles, because it had that soft and domestic feeling to them that i absolutely love to the moon and back

@m1shapanda, @snobwaffles, @vennnnn-diagram : you three are, excuse me for my language, so fucking amazing. i always wanted to talk to you so many times and even when i did, always hoped that we could’ve talked a bit more. misha, you’re so cool and i always wanted to just ramble with you; that and your art is so pretty and soft and just so DAMN COOL did i mention that? snob, you detective, you and your curse arts that make me laugh as much as pour bleach on my eyes (/j), you’re just so supportive and i really like that about you. ven, i wished we could’ve talked a lot more too with how just vibe with everyone so quickly and easily - you’re just as amazing, really.

and to all of my other moots, the same goes to you, even with the ones i didn’t talk to as much - just being moots with you, knowing that someone liked me like i liked them made me feel more belong on here and more a part of something. i’ve never been a part of something like this, and know so many people and to know that i mean something to them? yeah, that really, really means a lot to me.

i’d probably just be a lurker on here than anything… haven’t really thought that far, only that i know that i can’t stay on here any longer without feeling guilty, burdened, stressed, or all of the above. or maybe just start off as a smaller blog again without any sense of obligation because ever since i’ve hit 500, which was a while ago, that’s what this blog started to feel like with each bit of time that passed.

i’ve enjoyed it, of course i did, don’t get me wrong! i’ve just been enjoying it less than i did when i started off, that feeling of accomplishment and joy and pride at myself numbing a bit more with each milestone i passed. that’s just all me though, i’m sure.

anyways, not right now though, maybe just around the weekends when i actually have time to spare. so, until then, i’ll stick around here as much as i can. other than that, i don’t have much else to say other than thank you.

that i hope that you’ll keep doing what you love, whatever that is, despite the highs and lows. just know that the community you’re in is filled with people who love you through and through and that i do too - that you’ll do what you love because you want to, not because you should.

[little-devils-advocate]

My Personal Experience With Neil Gaiman Here on Tumblr

So, I'm sure anyone who comes across my Blog will see from my Pinned Post that it was previously Deactivated here on Tumblr. I essentially used the Blog to discuss controversial issues: abortion, gun control, BLM, etc. & had done a lot of work there. I had been running it for years & talked about some pretty heavy stuff, catching a lot of criticism for my views, but I had never been Deactivated or even had anything taken down.

As you can see from what I have Posted here since restarting, I am a huge advocate for the homeless. I had been Following @neil-gaiman for a while as a minor fan, mainly due to my enjoyment of his stories Stardust & American Gods. I've read none of his books, because the writing style didn't appeal to me, but I have some of them & watched the Stardust movie & the American Gods show.

Anyway, I'd previously seen him Posting here on Tumblr complaining about his residuals & how little money he was making, which rubbed me the wrong way for obvious reasons, but I let it go, because it wasn't that big of a deal to me at the time. Everyone has scruples.

OP:

Months later I saw him Posting about the recent writer's strike & going on a tangent again. Everyone was patting him on the back & agreeing with him & it irked me. Badly. So, I Reblogged it with a picture of a tent city & a link to Sia's album Some People Have Real Problems. Obviously, it irked me that someone of his means was complaining about his residuals & how little writers make when people all over the country are struggling to make ends meet, many of them falling victim to homelessness. Like I said: some people have real problems. Writers also make much more than your average worker, but I digress.

He. Was. PISSED. He then proceeded to attack me on his Blog. I can't remember exactly what he said, but it was something along the lines of 'I'm famous, how dare you question me!' I was then attacked relentlessly by his mob of fans to whom I vehemently defended myself & my position. I even recall one fan telling me that 'One day [I was] gonna wake up & regret insulting Neil Gaiman.' I think it's safe to say that day never came. 🙄

I wish I had screenshots for you all, but, like I said, my Blog was almost immediately taken down after the incident, which I find crazy as nothing I Posted in regards to this was out of line in any way. I did have some questionable shit on my Blog due to my endless defense against trolls, but like I said before, none of it had ever gotten pulled until then, so I'm really not sure what happened. I checked his Blog, but I can no longer find the Post there.

My guess is that Neil has some very serious issues with women &, quite frankly, I'm not suprised. I feel terrible for cracking up at him being dragged through the mud when I first got online this morning. I just saw part of the Post on FB via Threads & couldn't read it all, so I wondered what he did this time. I could never have imagined that it had to do with a SA or I would never have cracked a joke. I will try to be fully informed before I Post from now on, I just really felt a sense of vindication & closure when I saw that, & now even more so. And to that asshole, I will never wake up & regret insulting Neil Gaiman; Maybe if he wasn't being an entitled piece of shit with a broken moral compass I never would have done it. It just goes to show you that we need to stop idolizing celebrities. "You don't know these people."

I hope any of his victims continue to come forward so he can get his just desserts. On a personal level, I am so, so sorry that this happened to you & I empathize with you.

-LDA

Context:

[fishing-lesbian-catgirl]

genuine question: how can we use this website to be less annoying to others?

Glad to give my thoughts. Like I said, I’m very petty and most of this stuff probably isn’t as big a deal to most people. Anyway I’m bad at being brief so I added a readmore. Here are my personal rules:

1: Don’t add anything to the body of a post unless you have something that you really feel will add some degree of value, meaning, humor, context, or at least something to people further down the reblog chain.

This is the most important rule. Adding something to a post makes it longer, it makes it so everyone who reblogs it in the chain after you has to see it. If you have nothing to add but “wow” or “holy shit” you are lengthening the post for no reason. Those reactions can easily go in the tags.

This is also the reason I think gimmick blogs are so annoying. It’s one thing for a “heritage post” blog to reblog things related to its respective gimmick. Simply reblogging them puts that thing on their blog, so anyone looking at it or following them because they want to see “heritage posts” will see it. But they go a step further and add “X heritage post” for no real reason other than to brand the post as theirs.

When I see a post that I like that has useless additions that take up space while adding nothing I get mildly annoyed and go to the reblog of the person who reblogged it before they did just to trim the useless comments off. But if that person deactivated then I can’t trim the comment. Tumblr lets you trim to the original post without any of the additions regardless of if op is deactivated or not with the little X on the reblog menu, but only to the original post. It’s better than nothing though

This whole point is, to me, a bit of tumblr etiquette that makes it so you don’t have to see unrelated comments from someone you don’t follow just because they thought to add a pointless comment way up the chain. This definitely is petty, but if you remember how the old tumblr formatting worked, this was extremely important because each addition took up even more screen space with the line to the next persons url and squished the original post into smaller and smaller spaces. So that’s probably why I feel so strongly about it even though it doesn’t matter as much anymore.

2: The tags are mostly your free space to say what you want, BUT try and respect that OP will likely see them.

A LOT of communication done on this website is done through talking in the tags. That’s not what they were originally meant for but that doesn’t matter anymore. People will likely be looking in their notes to see tags by their mutuals.

The original poster can and will see every tag on a post, unless they delete the post or mute notifications. Mute notifications seems like it doesn’t work, but that’s because it only mutes future notifications on the post, the tags in your notes before muting will still be there regardless

This is to say that in most situations, if the op is someone like me who uses their notes to communicate with their mutuals and others in their communities, your irrelevant tags might also be there and annoy them. So use courtesy when tagging. Thankfully tumblr cuts off tags after a certain point on the notes page but still keep it in mind. I go overboard writing mini essays in the tags all the time, and while I do think that is a little annoying I do it anyway so I can’t blame people.

3: Keep blorbo tagging to a minimum if you can help it.

This is probably my most controversial stance, but blorbo tagging can be really annoying in certain circumstances.

The biggest offender to me are tagging make characters on posts about women. I don’t care that you think he’s your babygirl or whatever, I find this extremely annoying. I get it, sometimes a post fits your character really closely but the gender is wrong, but usually it doesn’t and they’re just doing this on any post even slightly related to a single aspect of a male character they care about. Often because most tumblr fandom people couldn’t be bothered to care about female characters if that was the only way to escape a saw trap alive.

There are other blorbo tag type things that annoy me, and again I’m a petty bitch, so take it with a grain of salt. But to me this one is a little personal (for lack of a better word). One of my first big posts on this blog was about wizard girls leaning in to kiss and having the brims of their hats get in the way. I didn’t mind the blorbo tagging about men that much, but they got less and less related to the post that it was annoying. The last straw before I deleted the post (back when I didn’t realize mute notifications actually worked. It might not have at the time) was a tag about their male blorbos leaning in to kiss and their belt buckles got in the way???

Idk I just find blorbo tagging in general mildly annoying and only do it when the post is an extremely perfect fit for on the characters I care about. I often block people for blorbo tagging about characters from things I dislike, I’m petty and the block button is fun for me to press, so I do that often. :)

4: NOT EVERY POST IS ABOUT YOU!!!

If you see a post that isn’t about you or your demographics or gender or whatever, you really don’t need to make it about you. That will very likely annoy op, especially because no one would have anything against you if you went and wrote your own post inspired by whatever the post in question said.

Not every post about lesbians needs to be made about gay men. Not every post about trans women needs to be made about trans men. Not every post about women needs to be made about men. And probably most important:

Not every post needs to be made about white people!

I know you might be thinking how writing something in the tags about your experience as a white person relating to what op is talking about, but I promise you they don’t want to hear it from us. They almost certainly are seeing tags from other white people because for some reason we can’t seem to see someone posting about issues of racism without having either the “I’m sorry for being white” or “white devils advocate” voices appear in our heads, just ignore it. Bite your tongue and reblog or move on for the love of god stop pestering the op.

Obviously the lesbian, trans women, and women ones are the ones I see in my notes that are annoying. But I can’t pretend I haven’t seen other white people say some really unnecessary shit in the tags / haven’t seen posts by nonwhite people who are clearly annoyed about how we always make everything about us.

Remember, you can always write your own post!

5: OP didn’t “turn off replies”

This feels like something that wouldn’t happen that often, but multiple times when I’ve made even mildly controversial takes about like video games or whatever, people will either add in a reblog or send me an ask complaining that I “turned off replies because I was afraid of hearing them disagree” usually followed by them calling me a coward. It’s very simple, I have reply settings so that people I follow and people who have followed me for at least like a week can reply, that’s it. I don’t have replies from everyone on because most people outside of those categories I don’t care about their opinions and they are annoying. If you can’t reply, that’s probably why. And if they actually did turn off replies, that’s because they don’t want replies, especially from people like the ones I just described.

6: I actually don’t have a problem with spam reblogging

This might seem backwards given my other stances on things taking up unnecessary space like useless comments, but I really don’t mind spam reblogs. I frequently do it when I see art I really like or when there’s a post that really resonates with me. Yes, it is annoying! No, I probably won’t stop. I do it so I can’t judge other people who do too. I am trying to keep it to like 5 times at most though, any more is just overkill.

7: OP is a stranger, not your friend

This one applies basically everywhere on the internet, but unless the person who made the post is someone who is like a mutual or someone that’s you’ve interacted with a lot before, they’re probably a stranger. Don’t try to be “playfully rude” or overly familiar. It’s annoying and weird and you will get blocked.

8: If you’re sending an anonymous ask, remember that OP is not going to take you in good faith most of the time

A lot of anon asks aren’t meant to be malicious, but a lot of others are. Bait, hate mail, insults, you name it, there’s a very good reason people like me assume every anon is sent in bad faith for some purpose. If you are going to send an anon ask, try to make it clear that you genuinely just want to ask a question and that you aren’t trying to trick op into saying something you can use to write a callout post against her or whatever.

You did that in this very ask thing and that’s why I’m writing out this long post instead of deleting it or letting it rot in the inbox.

9: Prev Tags etiquette / “Peer Reviewed” Tags

The usage of “prev tags” is controversial, a lot of people have different opinions on it. But with all the changes they made last year that made it harder to see the tags of the person before the person who’s reblog you are viewing, I think prev tags etiquette has changed.

My personal rules for prev tags are to copy the tags into my own tags, and then follow them up with a tag that says “<- prev tags”. Unfortunately tumblr tags convert dashes into spaces for some reason so it ends up looking like “< prev tags”. I’m stubborn and don’t want to like use an emoji arrow though. Anyway, tumblr mobile conveniently allows you to copy the tags of the person you are reblogging from surprisingly easily which I appreciate.

Unlike previous tags, which stay in the tags and don’t turn into an addition to the post, “peer reviewed” tags as they are sometimes called do get added to the post permanently for the remaining blog chain.

The unfortunate truth about this website is that some people have bad opinions on what qualifies as being meaningful enough to be cemented as an addition to the post via “peer review”. As such, the phrase “how could you leave this in the tags 🤣” has essentially become another “you sir have won the internet 🤣”

The shitty part about that is sometimes there are good and meaningful additions in the tags that are worth being added to the post as a whole. But you can add someone’s tags to a post without saying “how could you leave this in the tags”. Anyway this one is more subjective and hard to define so I hope I got my point across at least somewhat.

Anyway, there are probably a few other rules I personally follow that I’m not thinking about right now, but just follow general internet etiquette and try to keep in mind that op is a person who will likely read whatever you type, that covers most things tbh! Thanks for reading if you somehow read this far. Hope this helped! If it didn’t, oh well, I did try and warn you I’m petty and have strong opinions about things that usually don’t matter afterall

[bookishtheaterlover7]

Hi booky!

Marketing anon here.

So I don’t think whether or not CE is really married is really important at this point (RE: he’s in HW where the majority of relationships…I suspect have strings being pulled in the back).

The fact is that’s the narrative they are going to with and want to sell, so he is just pushing that narrative along. He/they want you to know and think he’s married. I personally believe that’s the important part about all this. But he and others around him are intentionally keeping it vague and I think it’s working to their favor because it plays into the whole privacy thing they were going for.

Saying “my wife is from PT” basically implies he married a woman from PT. That’s not giving anything exact but it’s also implying he married AB, the woman he’s been linked to most recently and she’s from PT. But at the same time, there millions of woman in PT/from PT. Who’s to say he’s not married to one of them, especially if they haven’t come out and said it was with each other? 🤣

So he confirms without actually having to confirm and if I had to make an educated guess, I would say that’s as good as you’re going to get it. Don’t quote me on this though.

I know some team real blogs were saying it’s normal for someone to not say their partner’s name, and that’s true for the most part. Think about how when you meet someone random - and you mention your partner. Do you necessarily say your partner’s name? Probably not, especially if you don’t know the person like that.

The thing is, with CE/AB the plausible deniability and vagueness is a pattern.

It’s not just him once saying my wife in passing, it’s also him not mentioning her for two years, then suddenly mentioning a nameless GF, then eventual nameless wife.

Same goes for her.

“My husband” “my dog” “pictures of the dog but no tags of the husband even tho everyone knows whose dog that is”. Even her trolling best friends do the most and only troll by posting suggestive backgrounds and no direct tags. If you’ve paid attention this entire time it’s very easy to tell there’s a reason they’ve done this for this long. TBH, I had my suspicions at first they were just trying to protect privacy because they hadn’t gone public yet and people were already harassing them. But after they went fully public the same charades continued all the way past the wedding and into the new year? That’s when my suspicions were more or less confirmed - that this was intentional orchestration and some form of strategy. Weird, yes, but not unheard of. In fact, my suspicions are that other celebs have done something similar to this too (re: Leo DiCaprio and Gigi hadid, bill hader and Anna Kendrick). I think in Hollywood there are so many strings being pulled all the time. Nothing is coincidence. Nothing is coincidence in marketing in general. Things are planned out well in advance and I mean this wholeheartedly.

He posted two stories with her and he never says her name out loud (does everyone remember that?), he doesn’t tag her (well she was deactivated, but he doesn’t mention her name in the videos in captions either).

She never refers to him by name and the one time PT reporters tried to talk to her she refused to talk to them. She lets in tags of herself but never anything confirming or alluding to anything directly to him. Notice how before they went public she was letting herself get tagged in basically everything related to their dating rumors and she was keeping all their dating comments in but deleting and untagging others? Now she’s doing the opposite and I feel that may be intentional too. Maybe.

The one time they attend the same premiere - did you notice he didn’t take pics with her? She got her solo pics and then disappeared? She then posts a pic of herself at this premier but doesn’t tag him, the movie, or the cast? Is it ungratefulness or is it strategy? Think about it.

His friends/her friends all post separately from the same place and it’s only this most recent PT sighting he’s in a photo with Joana (weird right?)

You get suggestive follows and likes but no real interactions that can be legitimate.

I believe that’s why TMZ has been acting so shady throughout all of this. I think they know something’s up.

I think everyone knows the big thing at play here is plausible deniability. It always has been.

Wearing wedding rings - ok but anyone can wear a ring TBH? It doesn’t really say too much.

Lastly - in my line of work marketing and PR work the same in some ways but also different. My company puts out press releases (which I help write) when we announce things like winning industry awards, acquisitions, partnerships, rebranding. But we don’t do a ton of really innovative stuff and PR is pretty low maintenance here. So while the methods and processes are the same, I imagine PR in HW is much different, more complex, and more creative (lol). I don’t have any answers for why they do what they do, but I can tell you the vague wording they’ve repeatedly use definitely means something. I don’t think it’s just coincidental.

What I’m trying to get here is that marketing and PR in any industry is going to involve a bit of “fudging the truth and stretching the line to make things seem a certain way to fit a certain narrative. It’s absolutely manipulative when you put it that way but it’s also business. It’s not personal. It’s why I don’t let it get to me and I just let it be. Don’t lose sleep over it. All things will unfold as they should.

Have a great night!

Hey, Marketing An🫶n!

Good to see you again! ☺️ And as I expected, you're insightful. And gave well-articulated thoughts. So, thank you 😌

Have a good night! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[pancakejikook]

So, I used to pretty active here, some of you might remember me. I'm not an army anymore but I still have a soft spot for jikook so I occasionally check on what they've been up to, but I don't delve deep at all and miss a lot of stuff. In the past few days however I was overcome by a sudden jikook-missing wave and started going through some of my tags from when my blog was active which made me miss them even more (and also made me realize that the overwhelming majority of the blogs I used to reblog from have since deactivated or just stopped posting/turned their blogs into something else, which was a bit sad). So I went to the jikook tag and started browsing a bit to see what was going on in the shipdom. I was a bit surprised to see how little activity there is in the tag compared to a few years ago, and there seems to be quite a mess going on: extremely polarized views compared to before, dubious amounts of delulu theories, and especially a lot of jikookers dropping the ship for one reason or another, although most or the reasons given make little sense to me (yes, I did see THAT post and all I'm gonna say is.. yikes). And like, you do you. We don't have to agree on everything. You know more than I do anyway lol, since I don't follow jikook closely. But there was one specific thing that kinda baffled me. The JM tattoo discourse. I'm late to the party, I know. I'm sure a lot was said at the time, but I wasn't around back then checking the tag. I was vaguely aware that jk talked about his tattoos in a live, and claimed the ARMY tattoo on his hand referred to armys (duh) and the J referred to Jungkook (makes sense). I literally didn't think anything of it at all at the time, I just thought it was nice of him to explain the meaning of his tats. But while scrolling through the jikook tag these past few days I realized that quite a lot of people considered that to be some sort of "debunking" that the JM stands for Jimin, sometimes to the point of dropping the ship because of it, or considering it the ultimate proof that jikookers have lost it if they still believe it stands for jimin and are now moving like teakookers or whatever. And I'm just, confused. I was like where is the debunking. Now. I'm not one for delulu theories. I think they can be fun sometimes, and I used to reblog some of them from time to time but for the most part I just thought they were cringe and always preferred to focus on jikook's actual actions and words (I never really actually cared if they were "real" or not, I just love their relationship and have enough reasons to believe they have feelings for each other and are attracted to each other, but how they deal with these feelings and attraction isn't really any of my business). However, the JM thing. I wasn't even aware it was considered a theory. For me it's just.. there. His ring finger literally spells out JM. Not a theory, it's a fact. Jk knows that JM is frequently used to refer to jimin, we literally have abundant proof of it. Jimin knows it. Armys know it. So unless you think Jungkook is a complete idiot who has somewhat never realized how that's gonna be perceived (which is possible I guess, but very unlikely), it was obviously deliberate. However, I never, ever, ever for a second thought that Jungkook would ever "confirm" it verbally one day. I see it as a statement on its own, that doesn't require an explanation and will never get one because it doesn't need one. It's just there, it speaks for itself, you can just choose whether you wanna see it or ignore it. So I was just puzzled to see people think there was any "debunking" going on. He didn't lie. Of course the M is part of ARMY. Of course the J is for Jungkook. But the JM is still for Jimin. He's not gonna say it because there is no need for him to. In a way, it's comparable to gcft. It's all there for everyone to see, and he knows it, but he's never gonna spell it out. He's never gonna say this is my love declaration for Jimin in video format. He doesn't need to, you'll see it on your own if you're open to it.

I really mean no offense but I feel that sometimes some people go so hard with the whole "I am SKEPTICAL because I'm smart and not a delulu shipper like you and I don't wanna be associated with you clowns" that it ends up circling back to being delusional except in the opposite direction. Apparently some of you genuinely think he just happened to put the J above the M, on his ring finger, and it just HAPPENS to read JM vertically. He also concidentally happens to never cover up the J with rings, and regularly gets the JM touched up but not the other letters (and I DID think jikookers were being delusional about this at first, but it kept happening and became undeniable so what was the point of denying it, I thought). All a coincidence. It doesn't mean anything, because Jungkook pointed out the obviousness of ARMY meaning his fandom and J meaning Jungkook. Did I miss something huge here?

[anti-endo-safe-space]

I'm terribly sorry to send this here,I just don't know where else to go about it.

There was a blog before for trauma dumping but I believe they've deactivated? I cannot click on their account really and I just— I need to know this.

Tw // potential SA (???) , cheating , lies , threats mentioned , manipulation

Please take care of yourself,, it's fine if you can't read this

So I've recently come to terms with the fact my ex may have been manipulating me. Though I'm unsure if she did it on purpose, almost every time we broke up she'd always say sorry, give me something, then tell me she likes me again when we're friends and I'd always go back to her. Despite her constantly ignoring me, lying, cheating on me and stuff.

But there's been something on my mind. Like really on my mind. I don't know what exactly to say about it, but she touched me. A few times. Like sexually. Nothing without clothes and nothing penetrating, not really, but she still touched me down there. ((For context I am female but Identify as a man / I'm FTM pre-transition)). She never asked, she did it in public a few times and wouldn't stop. I told her to, I know I said no, I know I ripped her hand away, but she never stopped. And I guess I don't know if it counts?? Because at the start of our relationship ((or in one of our previous relationships, it's hard to remember)) I told her I was fine with anything and that I was actually into that. But I don't really think I am. I told her she didn't need to ask I guess?? But that was a long time ago.. but I guess I can't blame her for still not asking for consent this time. But like,, I don't know why she didn't stop. I guess maybe I didn't say it seriously enough or something?? Or maybe she thought I didn't mean it? I know I say stop and don't mean it sometimes,, but idk,, she could've asked if I wanted her to stop genuinely?? And she did once,, but only once.

She's also pinned me down and forcibly kissed me,, I tried to turn my head away but she just pulled me back. And it's not like I hated it, it was fine, I just get anxious about kisses... And also after our break up (because I caught her cheating on me again) she kissed me without asking ((and during our breakup wouldn't stop talking about how she wanted to kiss me)). And I don't know

I don't know if this counts as SA. It's not like I hated it. I was flustered but it was .. enjoyable I guess??? I don't know. I feel like I might just be sour over the fact we broke up maybe??

I guess I'm asking you if you think this counts... Sorry..

Hey, we don't allow sorries, especially not for this. Heavy tw's for sa ahead

Sa isn't just penetration. Sa is any sort of unwanted sexual contact. If you say no and then she ignored it, that counts. From what you've said (which we believe 100% hands down /srs), she COMPLETELY went against you saying no. That is sa.

Enjoyable or not. It was sa. No means no, full stop. She ignored it. If she pushed you to say yes, and you didn't really want to, or she coarse you, that wasn't consent.

Even if you enjoy that kind of thing (like you mentioned in your post), it's still expected for the partner to do serious check ins. Not just take everything as consent.

We are so so sorry you went through that /gen

[minhosimthings]

i hope riddhi fucks off tumblr please. and yes, i strongly believe that's her and not some random adult

like, think about it, if she wasn't riddhi, there would be no need to do all that she did and an adult would simply say, "oh, no, i'm not riddhi, my english is just like that because (whatever fucking reason because it's ok to not have good english)"

instead she goes and acts like a child, which she very obviously is, and says unwarranted shit. there was no fucking reason to try and shame mona for talking about her nightmares because this is her fucking blog, and riddhi doing it is even more fucked up because as her once moot, she shouldn't have crossed that line. but then again, what do we expect from a fucking 12 year old who's not even fully 12 yet

also anyone with two fucking eyes would know mona's writing is legendary and if you don't think so, it's ok but you can at least agree that she's better than a 12 year old who's still learning english. if she said "riddhi's writing is better than yours" then i'm believing that it's riddhi herself

like i said in the post i reblogged, as someone who had no problems lying about her age and run a whole ass nsfw blog, i didn't think her deactivating deluluriddhi was the last we were gonna see of her

at first i wanted to be considerate of her age despite all that she did and hoped she wouldn't get any hate, but now i don't know anymore

NO CAUSE THAT'S WHY I WAS SAYING LIKE if you really were an adult why would you ever say "I hate being misunderstood"? No one is trying to misunderstand you seriously, we just made a collective decision because you eerily reminded us of someone we once knew where the fuck did misunderstanding come from?

Omg writing lengendary stop Selene I will smooch you and never let you go I have no problem with her saying anything against my writing, but to shame my nightmares? Something she did before the entire revealing her actual age fiasco came over? *Sighs* it's like she's trying to expose herself.

The one thing that pisses me off, is the fact that we were ok with welcoming Riddhi back if she agreed to only interact with sfw. But lo and behold remember what she said? "That won't work for me" I mean Kid seriously you brought the downfall upon yourself

[feelingdeath]

The last one (for a while)

I have zero drafts now, fewish followers, and this is going to be my 385th post.

I am logging off of tumblr, for a good bit. I did think about deleting my account, but i have people on here that i care about and who care about me (also i remember when @doritosaftersex deactivated his account and i felt bad). So instead ill come back in maybe a few months or years, or maybe never depends on well lol if i actually kms. Although don't worry i really doubt i have the time or energy for that. Before i go though i lowkey realised that i haven't ever spoken about like the well other side of me. The parts that i don't tumblr about. So here's this post- an Introduction and a Good-Bye.

My name's Piki, and that's me in the pfp { One of the good days}.

i like cats. (I think most people would start off like that).

M a living cliche and also a hypocrite cos i hate cliches and i literally wanna do something different, but oops =).

I have been in two relationships, second one going on right now, been over six months (and i think this is the last one because i might marry him [ totally will] and i couldn't ask for anyone more better).

I think I am an extrovert ? I don't really know. Making tumble mutuals was so hard for me i literally have only one ( @mqstermindswift ).

i like cyanide, the color and the song and the vibe. (My favourite artists are The Chainsmokers, Linkin Park, MGK, OH AND JAKEHILL [i love jake hill])

I like Italian food and will. eat. anything. that has cheese. I am kinda vegetarian though, i don't like the idea of eating an animal who probably had a family but i absolutely HATE animals as a whole (ref to point 3 about me being a hypocrite)

I hate everyone and everything, the first thing that i said to morphi and it also got me my nickname piki - which means m picky about everything.

i also love doing everything (fk m confusing). i dance, and love to cook, and i draw really well, and i can play the guitar, i learnt the violin nd the piano too a bit, i like debating a lot, and volunteering for things.

On the surface my life seems great, but then comes the well the stuff- i mean clearly it would take you a few scrolls across my blog to see how er bad it really gets but well-

I might have bpd? i am not sure.

i feel terribly lonely sometimes and also inferior to everyone around me.

my parents are not the greatest people out there. they both have done stuff that well i wont type it out here of course, but its bad.

the above thing dig this really deep pit of trust issues and well now i believe in tragedies more than hope ( morphi hates that but he'll get it once he knows)

i have tried to km, when i was younger. And if i had a penny for everytime i thought about killing myself elon musk and i would be homies.

i am really gorey, and i like horror movies and the gore and CNC and stuff.

i cant open up. too many expectations.

i get really low sometimes and i end up saying stuff or doing stuff and i don't particularly remember why or what i did, and so i poof (another thing morphi hates).

i hurt myself a lot which probably comes from point 6.

Sounds like two different people now. There is SO MUCH i haven't told about me, but if you have even like read this at all. M lowkey impressed. I am not going to go in and fix my spelling mistakes and capitalisation so go figure.

OKAY GOODBYE.

[pizzahutchan124]

I gotta work on finding my voice

All too often I fear posting anything original on here out of fear of being mediocre. But being mediocre is the only way to learn how to be extraordinary. Its a catch 22. You fling shit at a wall until one of it sticks. Really, the worst thing to happen on this site is that its out in the happy little gapping hell of an abyss that is tumblr, with little to no traction made in terms of engagement.

Is engagement on here truly the worse thing possible? Maybe. It probably depends on what circle you're in or what sort of brand you want to show to the world. I remember the last time I got into a discourse with a user on here. We fought over how valid Jaspers character (from Steven Universe) was and then he blocked me after spouting ad hominems. YEA, that lil exchange was over 7/8 years ago, yet I faintly remember the bitter bile I felt afterward. It could've been worse. Im not sure how, nor do I really feel like extrapolating those possible scenarios. There are also blogs who blow up over night, then deactivate due to being overwhelmed with the nature of being popular. The only proof that they exist remains in the posts that circulate around this site.

I don't go looking for fights whenever I log on here. My time here is meant to explore spaces and interests that I otherwise wouldn't have the means or resources to. And its interesting see the different takes people have on here. But I need to be aware of not crossing certain territories online. As nice as it can be broadening your horizons, the online world will always emulate the real world, and the real world often harbors terrifying, odious entities who thinks very little of the humanity inside you. Some are passive, others are upfront in their rancidity. Most of all of them are selfish to their core.

With that being said, I want to leave the world better then it was when I came in. Preferably that would be through transformative works or creating some sort of content, but that requires actual forethought and planning. Its hard to mesh creative pursuits with the all too real necessities of eating and paying bills, but its one that I'm trying to navigate. So far I think I'm doing a better job then most. My support system is still strong and I'm lucky enough to be in a position where I can be anything that I choose. Freelancing's been tough, but the work I've been getting has been top notch. The world is a scary place right now, but I'm confident that I'm smart enough to rise up to the challenge and blaze through it with flying colors.

Whenever I want to make a post here, I want it to be an original take and not something I parroted from another user, while keeping a tone that says "I'm in control and I'm knowledgeable about this thing right here." Yet, I end up sitting on my laurels only for the moment to pass. I don't sit with myself like I use to. I mean, I do, but not like before. Its different. Its for me, instead of the world. I don't event know what I want to show to the world in terms of Original Content. If I wanted to reflect back to the world what it truly was, I'd be a terrifying, wonderful creature with many beautiful eyes and gnarled teeth. Sadly I am only human. I'm going to have to make do with petting my Blorbos and my precious furbaby until my next paycheck comes in.

[did42069]

It's my 10 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

Holy Shit! I kept this mostly as a blog for my thoughts. Found my kink and then poof you took away the fun... So Twitter happened. Mr.Musk bought the bird and I found myself remembering that I have this blog thing that I used to frequent. News and politics have always been my deal, doesn't mean I didn't follow the sex blogs but that started out as a social thing. Since coming back I recently found out that I somehow had a filter that filtered the adult content, also found out how to deactivate that quickly. Seems the adult stuff became mostly scammers, which is sad... Ten years ago the sex blogs were the edgy stuff! And the community self governed. Early on there was a blog post about pedos, that content was up for not even a day! Devs have always been trash but with a little guidance we made a safe place for people of all shades to explore without judgement, for the most part. Also the engagement with everywhere! Now over the years I felt this was like a dying friend... Then whenever I missed a wrestling match or something similarly cool this became a quick look through. I've been through a lot, from being hospitalized half the time to getting better to trying to rebuild my life to finding out that my immune system is shit now due to chemo to my family imploding and most of the people I've helped throughout the years prior not being there for me... This blog became my escape from life the last few years but even though I'm grateful for the platform I'm still pissed at how the change has diminished this place. When I said that we self governed here's an example: many years ago there was a sex blog from a teen-age girl and she wanted attention, the sex blogs were the attention, it started out looking bad and then I and many others talked to her. Within the 2-3 years she was on here she flourished as a human being! Yes it was kinky of all flavours but she was able to talk to women on here that talked her through her firsts. We found out that she was pregnant later from force, that last year before the change, there was this domme blog but the lady was a sex psychologist in the real world... It was amazing to watch as this girl who was damaged flourished again. Her blog became a baby and me blog but she said she'd quit this place once the change actually happened. This place is a good starter for teens but it's not cool enough to be teen approved. Hopefully with the implosion of the 🐦 there's more people coming back to re-engage. But there's other apps out now some... Are just as great as Twitter was but the lag! Anyhow this blog of mine will stay up. Hopefully this place... Is interesting again

[dathen]

I cannot emphasize enough how much exclusionism harms LGBT ace and aro people.  There is no such thing as “well those aces are allowed, I’m just worried about straight infiltration” because they’re not actually doing shit to include even the aces that they give their free pass to!

I am asexual, aromantic, and agender.  While a lot of people would say that being nonbinary/agender doesn’t count as trans, but for the sake of theory let’s say it does.  By supposed exclusionist theory, one of these identities allows me to be included in queer spaces--my gender identity.  By their logic this should mean I have nothing to worry about, right?

Except I can’t check my asexual and aromantic identities at the door.  I may have three separate words to define myself, but in reality they’re so intertwined I can barely tell where one ends and where another begins.  I was best able to explore being agender when around other aromantic and asexual people, who had similar experiences as me.  I can’t put into words how beneficial this was in a very dark time in my life.

LGBT aces are not accepted by exclusionists in any real sense of the word.  We constantly see your mockery and your ace cringe compilation posts, we constantly see the “I hope ace people have a bad day--gays and lesbians only!” shitposts.  We’re told that half of our identity is embarrassing and childish and humiliating, don’t talk about it, pretend it away, only hype the attraction we do have (if any).  If you’re a trans aroace person like myself, you’re completely out of luck--it’s difficult enough for the community to remember that trans people exist and don’t also need to justify their place in the community with LGB attraction.  Hell, I remember seeing some using the term “queer trans people” to separate them out from straight and aroace trans people, to make sure the rest of us know we’re not welcome.

It erases the extremely important space to talk about the intersection of being ace and LGBT.  People shouldn’t have to talk about their sexuality while bottling up how being ace or aro affects it.  People shouldn’t be made to think that being ace or aro makes them a diluted form of queerness.  I shouldn’t have to untangle the jumble that is my identity, peel away and discard the threads of asexuality and aromanticism and how those have affected my life, and somehow try to talk about and relate to my gender as a stand-alone thing.  

This is NOT “acceptance.”  This is NOT “oh we’re just trying to keep straight people out.”  

When I first started considering I may not be straight, the first resources I found were LGBT blogs that said that asexuality was just people with so much internalized homophobia that they couldn’t accept their own attraction.  I tried forcing myself to have attraction, training myself to warm up to the idea of having sex, and just traumatized myself further.  I still don’t think I’ve recovered from this almost ten years later, and I think the extent of my sex repulsion came from these self-corrective behaviors.  While I’ve seen people who formerly identified as asexual later decide a different identity fits them better, stating this is fact for everyone who doesn’t experience attraction is unspeakably harmful.

I’ve been in this game for a long time, well before the backlash that caused aspec resources to vanish, back before “discourse” was even a commonly used word.  I used to try to play along with what everyone told me to do to be a Good Little Ace.  Avoided calling myself “queer” because only people with attraction can call themselves that, right?  So if I made a post about the struggles I had with self-worth and suicide ideation as an asexual person, in hopes to reaching other asexual people with similar struggles as me, I was still staying within the lines!  No mention of being part of any community or calling myself “queer” or “LGBT” or anything!  It didn’t prevent me from getting so much harassment I had to deactivate my blog, half of involved accusations of “you’re just pretending to be oppressed so you can infiltrate the LGBT community!” even though I hadn’t said a word about it in my posts!

I am so discouraged by young people who are already so deep in exclusionist rhetoric, and who would rather swallow up and parrot unquestioned hatred rather than think about the harm they’re doing.  If your attitude is “I’m not an aphobe, I’m just an exclusionist,” please stop and think of the actual effects of your beliefs.  Listen to the people this affects, listen to how this has affected our entire lives.  This isn’t an announcement that we’re more oppressed than you, this is a call to recognize we’re with you and that giving us space and companionship and support can be literally life-saving.  I am begging for people to listen to each other’s experiences, see and hear us as people, rather than just a jumble of letters to unfeelingly sort.  

[mooshua]

hi uh it’s mooshua (aurora, moosh, whatever you want to call me). I’m so sorry about my sudden leave and everything and worrying some of you. that was really uncool of me to do and I really am so regretful for that. honestly I’m kinda embarrassed right now. explaining myself is rather difficult because, I won’t lie, I’ve been having feelings of inadequacy towards both myself and the works I put out. lol so I’m kind of having a hard time articulating my emotions because my mind is all over the place and I’m literally sweating as I type this out.

long story short: I got burnt out, started hating my writing with all my being, accumulated some Not So Nice messages, and then just did not want to be perceived anymore.

the long story: like I said above, I’ve been having Conflicting Feelings with regards to what I have been writing. anytime I read what I wrote I would just feel my gut twist and turn like I was going to throw up because I WAS SO EMBARRASSED. nothing about it was... up to my standard? nothing flowed right, I could point out a billion mistakes, and I wasn’t laughing like I used to. and it wasn’t just feeling embarrassed, it was like whenever I wrote something I would Not Be Having Fun With It because I kept thinking “deadline deadline deadline you need to finish this by the end of this week it’s only 5k words are you saying you can’t come up with a measly chapter in a week you used to be able to write 15 chapters in a month you dog” and I would just force myself to sit in front of my computer for hours and when I finally finished I wasn’t really happy with the final product I would just think “god I need a smoke break” even though I’ve never smoked in my life. and then I’d also get “please update!” messages/comments in the dry periods and, don’t get me wrong I really appreciate that people are reading my stuff, but I’d feel more and more stressed because then I’d automatically think “Oh My God People Are Waiting And I’m Letting Them Down.”

so with all these bad feelings welling up inside me I thought “I need a break.” and that’s what I did. I took like a 3 week break in september/october (I honestly don’t remember because the days have been bleeding together) in hopes that I just needed to rest to get my brain started again! after those 3 weeks I then did the usual routine of writing and updating, but again Things Just Didn’t Feel Right because it felt like I was diving back into that stress inducing spiral of the dreaded Weekly Updates.

I mean, I would get so hung over this stuff because in the back of my mind during my free time I’d be thinking “I could be writing and finishing up both series right now” and you know what? I’d do that. well, I tried at least. I’d force myself to sit and type whenever I had ANY free time because I already had everything planned, I just needed to put words to a page. well, doing that for nights on end was just mentally exhausting me to New Levels. everything I was doing was not sustainable at all.

AND THEN THINGS SLOWLY GOT WORSE because I would have zero confidence in my writing and every week or so I’d get a message in my inbox saying something along the lines of (or rather word for word) “your writing isn’t that good/special/anything new I don’t understand why people are reading it/why you get so many notes/you’re not as funny as you think you are” and at first I would kind of laugh at it and go “oh trust me buddy, I’m wondering the same thing too” and then delete it because I do Not Wish to entertain the thought on my blog, but then I was hitting a new all time low in my mentality and I got another message on the day I deactivated which was a Really Bad Day and it read “your writing isn’t good” and I went back to the chapter I was editing for the day, felt my gut do that twist and I thought “you know what? you’re right. it’s not. goodbye.” pressed the forbidden red button and honestly felt a weight lift off my shoulders because that meant I no longer had to deal with that stupid cycle of constantly updating in order to Feel Something.

I kept thinking “why is this not as fun as it used to be, why am I so stressed out all the time opening that stupid doc and going on my blog?” like I would literally sit down and think about this as if it was a math problem or something. my inadequacies kept rising within me but I would just bottle it up, go to writing and trying to answer messages like nothing was wrong because I really didn’t want to worry anyone or think I was a charity case who needed help, but now that I think about it I really should have talked this out instead keeping my mouth shut. I just thought this was something everyone goes through so I was like whatever it’ll pass. I kept thinking “this shouldn’t be as deep as I’m making it” and brush it aside, but then I kept thinking negatively about my ability to write and literally DREADED sitting down in front of my laptop that I would have to hype myself up in order to get a sentence in. I think the last time I actually felt really proud of something I had written was during the summer...... and then after that it was just downhill.

and listen. I know this is just a Fun endeavor and I really shouldn’t care about what other people think as long as it makes me happy, but along the way I stopped being happy because I started caring Way Too much and putting unrealistic expectations on myself. it’s weird. I know at my Big Age I should have a better mentality, but it’s been eating at me for a while and I just wanted to pull the plug.

okay now the part that a lot of people are wondering: are you going to finish your series? I plan to. I really want to. I think it’d be a waste not to. I’m still feeling pretty conflicted right now with my writing, but I already mapped everything out, and I don’t like to break promises since I already said I was going to do this thing. thanks to anyone who read my works and I’m sorry to have worried you. I just needed to take a step back and think about what’s good for myself.

yeah. so that’s my explanation. this whole thing is so long and for that I’m sorry. if you went through this then pat on the back for you. I don’t know when I’ll come back or how long it will take. I just want time for myself and to not think about anything with regards to writing. like at all. also I only have 1 request: for anyone who downloaded the series from ao3, please do not repost or reupload or redistribute them. please I’m literally begging. I deleted them for a reason and I really don’t like the idea of these stories floating around without my consent. when I do get back into it I’d like to make edits to what I have written. idk if any of my mutuals still want to talk to me after this but feel free to lmk lmfao sorry I know that I sound like I’m off the deep end but I really just need to cool it before I start diving back into a Healthy Relationship With My Writing Hobby lol. why am I so dramatic... SORRY. anyway. I hope you guys are staying happy and healthy during this time. don’t forget that.

[shyampyari]

hi so um im just gonna say this

people started a skull emoji thing where they would go i don't like t user so and so

you didn't do it so sorry but i want to say this

i don't like vee, tee, alima, kansha/cunsha whichever it is, jugn00's new blog who something

now people are saying that my reason (they don't answer asks same as anon sent to ravememcoi [not exact url]) isn't valid cause they don't owe me anything and they don't have to reply to asks

but 1. its annoying to send people asks and not have them answered when you know they are receiving them and it's just compliments and also 2. they go around writing all this love poetry and aren't willing to drop a topic that came up ages ago (can't remember url but vee something url started this again for no reason)

now you'll say BUT THEY DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TO PLEASE YOU WHY DON'T YOU GET IT

but understand that i am not obligated to like or not dislike them either and since you didn't mention it i am not obliged to you to not mention that i dislike your mutuals

also people are saying you need to deactivate your acct cause your personality is bad and just 1. she doesn't need to do anything to please you same as vee, tee, mirrorvid etc 2. press block and stfu

also i don't care much for the people that started this again

they started it knowing that this would happen and if they had just chosen to not answer the anons starting this again it wouldn't have happened and again, their chioce to post abt whatever they want but my choice to not love you

i remember trying to send one of them anons for a while because i wanted to be friends and when she finally replied to my ask she just basically insulted me and started correcting my grammar

it was not a mean or hate anon these people just want excuses to prove they are better than everyone else and if someone get's their hands on this they will for sure start correcting this ask like an english answer script

i am actually glad they started their mutuals only blogs

at least the rest of the world now knows that they shouldn't interact with them or they will be treated badly

DAMN ANON PREACH.

But I actually have more to say lmao fjfnnxn

This has to be the shittiest ask game that has happened in a while and tbh i didn't want to interact with this game for the same reason.

I wouldn't want to post about blogs that i have never interacted with because idk what they are really like to hate on them and if my moots were being attacked, id take that very personally. Because I wouldn't disregard an anon with a valid point even if its against my own moot. There are people we dislike and people we can't stand and what should we do? Walk awayeyaeya and avoid drama instead of causing it :/

im literally just trying to vibe here 🧍🏻‍♀️

people need to stop being obsessed with me fr fr

Yk whats the worst part about these asks tho? This was a chance to actually consider your own mutuals and their internet and social presence and validate or question their actions. But what happened? 'Not my mutuals 😭😭😭😭' ig it's time you consider your mutuals are toxic sis

Ik some mutuals (mine) that have been around interacting with posts and blogs that are very vocal about hating and getting me off the internet lmao but here's my take from this: this is a social platform and what I do with it is my fucking business. It was, at a point, ok for people to make hate comments about someone because they thought only their circle of clowns was seeing it so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

nonynom beloved would you believe me if i said ive been there? I actually wanted to be moots with someone and we followed each other a day before the discourse happened and BOOM no words exchanged they blocked me and then a mutual of mine sent me an ss of something they said about me, so bestie just consider it a bullet dodged, at least now you know you don't want to interact with someone.

Bro if they really did that, thats pretty sticky smh 2/10 would not recommend such an interaction

again, im not a part of this 'skull anon' bs, im answering this ask as an ask because id respect anyone that would take out time to talk to me tbh

[saetoru]

rating my usernames in all my time on tumblr !!

don’t even bother commenting on how many blogs and urls i went through. i know. i was having a rough time being content okay. let’s not get into it

my first sfw blog

everesteen - i made this url in middle school with a friend. i genuinely don’t know where it came from or what it means. i am almost certain it was an inside joke on something, but i really can’t remember. i posted my first writing on my tumblr i had since middle school with that exact url, and i ran with it for a while before i decided i needed an anime url. i give it a solid 8/10 for nostalgias sake

teesumu - this url was insanely perfect. it was my whole life at one point. atsumu was my whole life at one point. there were times where i genuinely thought he might take sakusa’s place as my top, but i have stayed loyal to kiyoomi. the kiyoomi url i wanted was taken so this was my second choice and i ran with it and it was so iconic. 15/10

itachiyama - i literally jumped through hoops to contact the person who had itachiyama and asked them if i could have it and they were so sweet about it. i honestly felt like god when i got that url. i was on the fence about changing from teesumu to itachiyama but it was such a power move to have a canon url that i couldn’t not use it. only downside is that since it was a canon url, i got drowned in the tumblr search when you searched me by all the itachiyama related posts so i give it a solid 9.5/10

my first nsfw blog

kiyownme - this url is still so close to my heart. someone took it after i changed it and i forgot to save it on a blank blog so i have them blocked now out of pure spite bc i’m salty. this was a wonderful play on his name and it’s very representative of our relationship since kiyoomi does in fact own me. absolute 11/10

saintmanjiro - this was also a url i used briefly on my old nsfw and then after i deactivated i used it on this one for a bit too. it was good. it was basic and stuff, but saintmanjiro sounds rly good and rolls off the tongue nicely. it has a good ring to it. i give it an 8/10

my personal/writing side blogs (very brief blogs)

minejiro - a great play on manjiros name. i love it. this was basically a personal blog that i had my tokrev and mha side blogs attached to when i deactivated and moved from teesumu / itachiyama. i didn’t post a lot on this blog, but popping into peoples inboxes with minejiro as my url was pretty neat. i give it an 8/10 too.

drakensbby - this was my first tokrev side blog url. this was a flashback to when draken was my first love from tokrev. i heavily replaced him so rip king. but i kinda hated this url ngl. it was so basic and everyone said it was cute and all but i was like no. i need a better one. i was gonna get a better draken url once i thought of one, but before that could happen, i went to loving hanma. 5/10

shujisbaby - this url was a step up from the last one, but also not very unique. it was pretty bland. but i am shuji’s baby so this is not exactly a lie, but it could’ve been better. this can have a 6.5/10

shujiphoria - this url was so cute. she was such an icon. she carried my url history on her back with her slay queening girl bossing self. she was such a great play on his name. i loved her. but then she was also still kind of basic bc there were a lot of phoria urls going around so i was like ugh nooo but i still loved her. 9.5/10

hanmine - this was good. it was great. i liked it. it really established my dominance as hanma’s one and only. he’s mine you know. but then ppl kept saying it looked like hanime and i was like :/ so 7/10

katsuphilia - this was my mha side. she never had a url change bc i never rly used her oops. she was cute. she was adorable. you couldn’t go wrong with her. she had a cute theme too. i liked her. 8.5/10

this blog

hoeruchiyo - besides briefly being saintmanjiro as stated above, this was my next url. it was good. i like it a lot. i was having a bigggg sanzu phase at the time so i rly rly liked it. the downside of this one is that since it has hoe at the front, and tumblr ig censors that word a bit, when you searched me, i didn’t show up at first unless you typed like half the url instead of just the first few letters and that kind of bothered me. i give it a 7/10 bc i love sanzu, but not enough to commit to a url for him bc i love hanma and shinichiro more

sakusins - i actually planned on using this as my first nsfw url wayyyy back and then i backed out and then when i decided again that i’d have a nsfw and actually committed to it, i used kiyownme instead. i never actually had a sakusa url under any blogs i went by tee on (i used an alias on my old nsfw), so i thought it was long overdue. i rly love this url and i’m very content with it and i don’t think i’ll be changing any time soon at all. it’s short and cute, it shows up on the search properly, it’s a fun play on his name, and it has relation to my blog content. very great url choice i rly slay queened with this one. 10/10.