#sadly this fandom is a little empty here on Tumblr

[akumicchi]

Inside the cat's skin

Thundercats Headcanons pt 1: Grooming.

pt1: Grooming (you're here)

pt2: Vocalizations

I don't know who might read this but I do need to get it out of my system.

Grooming is a fundamental part of Thunderans' life. Just like Apes, fixing each other's appearance is a way of bonding, wether it is via brushing their hair or fur, dusting off clothes, or just cleaning up a messy eater.

Scratching someone's scalp or just playing with their hair counts as grooming too.

It's common among members of the same household, specially in mother-child relationships, spouses and close friends.

Grooming is usually started by a light scratching to the other's arm, followed by a consent question.

This activity can last from a few seconds to half an hour. Since personal space is such an important thing for Thunderans, getting used to someone else's presence and touch is a crucial step in becoming well acquainted, though the amount of familiarity required between the subjects to start grooming depends on both their boundaries.

It is also a way of providing comfort. Caressing someone's fur stimulates their nerve endings in a soothing way, being the most sensitive spots, the scalp, ears, chin, face, nape, shoulder blades and upper arms. Usually accompanied by purring.

It is also considered as a form of intimacy and some Thunderans prefer doing it while naked because of the sense of emotional proximity it provides.

It's a normal thing to do when cuddling and as aftercare.

[elysiunms]

Welcome!

Realized I never created an intro and kind of just jumped into the whole posting thing :D Welcome! My name is Elysian/Elysium but I usually go by Sian. I am a Transguy using He/it pronouns and most of my time spent on this blog will be yelling into the emptiness. I am autistic/ADHD and Dyslexic, so I'm so so sorry if I come across as mean over text, I promise I'm not :(

My blog will include these FICTIONAL trigger warnings! Violence, Drug and Drink abuse, Physical Abuse, Murder, and Attempted Murder, Child abuse, Indirect self-harm (ex. not eating), Ghosts, Near-drowning, Dead family Members, Verbal Abuse, Panic Attacks, and Blood.

I kind of started posting so I could have records of fandoms I've been in, headcanons and just interact in communities a little more- it's not really to gain traction or anything (though I'm not opposed to that <3)

Feel free to interact with me though! I don't bite and love questions! Most of what I talk about here is developed with my partner, Saintless, who doesn't have a tumblr sadly :(

Current fandoms are (Will stay updated):

Nerdy Prudes Must Die

Hannibal

Warrior Cats

Guardians of Ga'hoole

Wings of Fire

Furry

I am NOT into Starkid and the only reason I am into NPMD is because of Max lmao, I think the directors gave us a good base for a character and I want to expand on him more! (He's my oc now sorry /hj)

Current Projects (Will stay updated):

FF!NPMD (Fanfic/rewrite kind of thing) - Semi-public, will share fics and headcanons but probably nothing else.

Annwyl - Personal Worldbuilding Project, may hear from time to time but we will see

Endless Isles - Personal Warrior Cats project, you won't hear from it sorry

Ever-nest - Public Warrior cats project, also won't hear from this

FAQ:

What does FF! mean in front of character names? ff! means fanfic! It is for my NPMD rewrite/fanfics which focus on Max's childhood up until he's out of college. I decided to give it its own tag for easy scrolling on my profile if needed and to differentiate CANON Max from my HEADCANON Max, as they are different in my head. Other Characters will also have ff! in front of their name for the same reason- they're completely separate from canon and built off of the little tidbits we barely get for them in NPMD.

Who are James and Richard? These are characters in the ff! world- and Max's family. In the musical, we only get a bit about Max's home life and only get 1 family member, his dad, and how much of a dick he is to Max. Since the fic focuses on Max's life from childhood to around 25, we needed family members for him. His mother hasn't been given a name, and we're not sure if she will have one since shes- uninvolved… in his life. Richard is Max's dad and James is Max's older brother.

You ship Max with multiple people? Why is that? You don't just date one person in your life. In my rewrite, Max and Kyle date for a short time (under six months) before Max dates Richie (Current). This is to explain why Max may be aggressive to Kyle (He was very hurt and holds a grudge like a bitch) It just adds more depth to the characters, rather than having Kyle just be Max's best friend and nothing else.

Do you excuse Max's actions in the musical? Nope! He is horrible and deserves the consequences he got. But I also strongly believe in nurture over nature. You are not born horrible, Max is SEVERELY fucked up and ff! is meant to explore that, not excuse it.

Why is Max and Kyle gay in your writing? He's Bisexual- which most of the fandom leans towards for him from what I have seen. His ship with Grace is cute- but that's obsession, not love. "But he's clearly straight!" Are we looking at the same man? This man kicks his feet when he lays down and asks to cuddle! He does silly dance moves? Mans did an airplane with his arms in Literal Monster, please look again, I know what he is! /lh Kyle does come off as straight, but I'm silly, and he's silly, and I wanted him to be gay,, smiles.

[thebeyondasks]

Asks open!

You happen upon some charts set up on an empty stall. There's a small slot, some paper and a pen. Surely nothing could go wrong if you wrote something...?

-----

Characters (left to right):

Eden - he/him OR she/her, god of fate, partner of Melody Melody - Any pronouns (they/them preferred), god of chaos, partner of Eden Reave - She/her, god of torture/earth, partner of Mirror Mirror - She/her, god of death/ice, partner of Reave Grey Melody - She/her, cult leader, partner of Yuko Glintsoul Solstice - Any pronouns, god of gender Daemon - He/him, just an enderman

Luka - She/her, angel of death, partner of Miku Little Shit - She/her, demon of being loud af, partner of Luka Artemis - She/her, weretiger, partner of Nyx Nyx - She/her, intergalactic council, partner of Artemis Whisper - She/her, goddess of healing Ruplsam - They/them, ex-ruler

Not pictured: Reaper/Hunter - He/they, werewolf experiment Doggy - He/him, PlateUp! mop/buffer Jupiter - She/her, Snapdragon (admin snap) - Other characters from my ToyHouse may be asked through here (mainly for friends/mutuals)

Please read the rules before posting! Questions with adult content are allowed for some characters (they will not be answered on Tumblr but rather on Twitter/Itaku), but will be ignored for: -Whisper -Eden -Melody -Mirror

-----

I am new to ask blogs and posting on Tumblr in general, so be warned! This is an OC-focused account, but you can ask for thoughts on fandom OCs if I know them! 

Anonymous asks are turned on! Please do not be afraid to ask questions, I don’t bite~

A few of my characters are shipped/paired with other characters not owned by me, namely Eden + Melody, Reave + Mirror, Little Shit + Luka and Artemis + Nyx. I will not ship these guys with other OCs or fandom characters, but I will draw interactions as realistic to the character as I can.

18+/suggestive questions are allowed, but they will not be posted here sadly :)

Please try not to be disrespectful! I am an adult so I can handle jokes but I’m not going to respond to nasty questions.

I am slow with responses sometimes, so if I take a while to respond I apologise in advance!

I will not draw a bunch of OC interactions unless we're already mutuals. Sorry!

P.S. this blog may have character interactions with ships you don’t like, like height gap and pet play, feel free to leave if you dislike them! :D

Thanks for stopping by!

[mrskodzuken]

"The accumulation of those little despairs is what makes a person an adult."

✿ Age in bio (or anywhere accessible/visible in your blog) to interact. Ageless blogs, blank and empty blogs and porn bots are automatically blocked on sight.

✿ Ageless blogs and blank blogs, please refrain from reblogging my nsfw pieces and/or reblogs.

✿ For followers uncomfortable with sm*t/nsfw stuff, kindly block the tag #🐱saku.smut along with the usual fandom nsfw tags (such as #haikyuu smut, #jujutsu kaisen smut, etc).

✿ Minors 14 years old and below are refrained from following me but are still allowed to interact (strictly sfw only). Minors 15 years old and above, on the other hand, are now allowed to follow me though you have to abide by my blog dni/byf (particularly blocking the sm*t/nsfw tags). If—IF!!!—I see you liking, commenting, and even reblogging with my content (also reblogs) that have the tag ‘🐱saku.smut’, I will (unfortunately and sadly) block you 😊 /gen

✿ I don’t accept requests (writings) unless it’s for an art ask game/event. All my writings are purely self-indulgent and written with a female reader in mind (but I’m trying to write fics for gender-neutral readers, too). Thirsts and brainrot (fluff and sm*t) are okay though (applicable for Haikyuu/Jujutsu Kaisen/Obey Me! characters only).

✿ All the characters depicted in my writings (sfw or nsfw) are either aged-up or canonically post timeskip. I do not write underaged characters in an nsfw setting/scenario—that’s a big no-no here.

✿ Please don’t hesitate to use tone indicators when replying/sending asks/DMs and reblogs/answering the taglist form(!!!!!), else I wouldn’t know if you’re joking or not (in case I don’t see any emoji enclosed). /g

✿ This blog interacts with and supports DC blogs/writers/content creators and may share some dark content, so reader discretion is strongly advised. Proper tw/cw’s will be tagged accordingly.

✿ DNI if: racist, ableist, sexist, have a hatred towards the LGBTQIA+ community, have a hatred towards DC writers and blogs, participated in character hate night, blogs who spam-like posts jfc (depends on the blog), bully other Tumblr blogs jfc (doxxing other people and sending anon hate), plagiarizing other people’s work, reposting my and other artists’ art!!! (without permission AND credit), Islamophobic, pedophile/creep, blogs sending real sugar daddy/baby asks/comments/DMs. Also don’t be rude! :)

※ If you have other queries, please don’t hesitate to shoot me an ask or DM and I will gladly help you! *headpats*

[mywitchcultblr]

PSA for all new users

Alright so i saw some new users who came from Twitter, Instagram and TikTok and they post as if Tumblr is the same with those platform. No, buddy hey hey my brother in Akatosh, this platform is quite different than Twitter, Instagram and TikTok.

New account? You can't just post an edited picture of your number #234 lunch and expected to get a lot of likes like in Instagram. Unless you already a part of a niche/fandom and has following, trust me... Nobody will care ( or very little )

GET INTO A NICHE/FANDOM, Tumblr is a very fandom dominated platform and it's less general like Twitter or Instagram, get yourself into a group or two, maybe you can make your blog about LGBT issues? Dragon Age? TES? Fallout?

Once you get following on those niches and establish yourself, you can expand to other niches and groups ( this is just advice if you want to get optimum following and exposure, you can reblog or post anything )

Likes is very nice, but reblog have a greater impact on a post. From my observation, per 1 reblog there will be 4 more notes from that reblog

IF YOU ARE A NEW ACCOUNT please please put some effort on your blog aesthetic and don't use the default profile picture or people will think you are a bot

I SWEAR TO GOD, please don't type like this: S3X or D34TH or K1LL ( unless you are in Homestuck fandom ) typing like that on unironic post will make it harder for people to read and understand what you meant to say, especially if they already have difficulty reading context or they have dyslexia. I'm not sure how other autistic people feels, but I'm autistic and the 'S3X D34TH' kind of post gives me a headache.

THIS IS NOT TWITTER OR TIKTOK nobody will ban you or temporary ban you for saying 'MOTHER FUCKING CUNT FUCKING DIE' or 'FUCKING DIPSHIT' so you don't have to censor yourself, instead of typing D34ATH, if you are really uncomfortable with the subject, it'll be better for you to censor it like this: D*ath

Don't get discouraged if your post get 10 notes or something like that, Tumblr has a much smaller user base than other platforms ( and it's kinda dying ) also everyone have their own niche/fandom

Tumblr is more like a personal public diary to post your unhinged thoughts or hanging out with fandoms, not a place to be an influencer or whatever. You wouldn't get a brand deal for being famous on Tumblr *laugh* also, people wouldn't care if you make an advertisement post promoting huge brands like Hello fresh or whatever ( in fact, it's more likely that you'll lose followers)

Post about brand or business that most Tumblr users like? Post promoting cute stuff like plushies, keychain and sticker ( Tumblr also more friendly to small or indie business, Tumblr really don't like huge shitty companies, if coca cola try to promote something here they'll get clowned) Tumblr users also likes LGBT/POC/minorities owned business

Be careful with blogs asking for donations, sadly, a lot of them are scammers ( not all of them, but you know *shrug* ). Please check the blog throughly and DM the OP if you want to donate.

New blog? Don't left your blog empty or with barely any post. Reblog a lot of stuff so people wouldn't think you are a bot

Don't use the same posting style like on Instagram and Twitter, don't use a lot of dots for a long post, use read more.

Don't put tags on your post, put them on the appropriate place! This is not Instagram, writing the list of tags wouldn't do anything

Lastly, if you are a conservative blog, you are more likely to get your blog pixelated LMAO

[therewasatale]

Deal?

On Ao3.

Summary:  ReverseAU How Vetinari decided to become a watchman, and how Vimes started to plan out to become the Patrician.

Note: @lurfck art from tumblr really inspired me, go and see their art. its pretty cool. I always wondered that when will I get back to the fandom and Here. I. Am. With an AU that noone asked for, but it keeps me up for nights and makes me write.

Commander Vetinari pulled back the hood made from dark fabric. Water droplets cascaded of the material joining into those on his cape. Reaching up, he took off his helmet and with it under his arm, walked down the corridors of the Patrician Palace. He let his footsteps echo and glanced at one of the paintings. He looked into its eyes for a few seconds, and then walked up a staircase. Arriving at the office, he waited and then knocked slowly and deliberately.

"Come in, Commander."

Inside, Lord Vimes gazed out the window looking over Ankh-Morpork. Drops of rain knocked on the glass, the commander knew it was reinforced multiple times, but their sounds still managed to be heard in the room. As the door closed, the man turned, with a small smile on his face.

"Good evening, Vetinari."

"Sir." Said Vetinari. "You have sent for me."

To Patrician's waved towards his table, upon which a kettle steamed, accompanied by two cups. They took a seat about the same time, and the Commander placed his helmet on a stack of unregarded paper nearby. Vetinari glanced at the uppermost one just under his helmet, then turned his attention towards the Patrician.

"So, are we celebrating with tea?"

"You don't drink anymore, and neither do I. And besides, Sybil always brings a box of tea as a gift when she visits."

The edge of Vetinari's mouth twitched, and turned slightly upward. A rare thing indeed. "How many boxes do you have?"

"More than enough, I already had to dedicate a separate room for them." Vimes glanced at him and added. "But there are always taste testers of course."

The Commander nodded and reached for the kettle. "How many years has it been?"

"As if you don’t know exactly. " Lord Vimes snorted, but he couldn't suppress his smile. They both knew the answer very well.

"We have exciting years behind us, starting with that dragon."

"Both of us almost died."

"You had more close calls than I am, if I am not mistaken," said Vimes after thinking a bit.

"Really? I thought they tried to kill you more."

"Well, they tried, but mostly you got in the way."

"Thanks to you," smiled Vetinari into his cup. "Since, if I recall it correctly, this all was your idea to begin with."

Lord Vimes snorted, but he couldn't really argue with it. It happened years before, when both of them were just kids, and didn't know what kind of future was waiting for them.

Samuel Vimes entered his room and stopped after a few steps. Something was off, he really couldn't put a finger on it, but it made the hairs on his neck stand up. He glanced around, then blinked into the darkness. He opened his mouth to say something but decided against it. Well, maybe it will make him look like a fool a bit.

"You shouldn't be here," said Vimes, and waited.

The shadows moved in one corner and a figure stepped out. He wore clothes colored in various shades of black, only broken by two ice blue eyes.

"It's nice to see you too, Vimes." Havelock Vetinari pulled the black mask and hood down from his head. "Don't light the candle."

"I can't see in the dark." Said Vimes with a small snort.

"Take four steps forward then you can sit down to your table."

"Why are you here?" Vimes walked with outstretched hands and felt the corner of his desk around the fourth step. Finding the chair, he took a seat. He could not see or hear it, but he still managed to feel the movement of his guest. When he spoke, the voice came right next to him.

"Just wanted to have a quiet night." He pulled out a small bottle from the depths of his dress, which landed on the desk with a soft clink.

"What? Are you trying to poison me?"

"If I wanted to kill you, Vimes, I could have done it the moment you stepped in."

There was a silence and then Vimes gave out a nervous sigh.

"You always knew how to put people at ease. What did you say, why are you here?"

"I'm just here to talk."

"Oh."

"Vimes."

"All right, all right. But I don't have a glass."

"It's fine." Out of the corner of his eyes Vetinari watched as the young nobleman glanced in his direction and then towards the bottle. "Wine from Überwald. I recently got it." The cork got out the bottle without a single pop.

"Oh." The silence waited patiently for him to continue. "And how are your studies in the Assassins Guild?"

There was another pause.

"It's...fine. I'm learning a lot." Vetinari sipped his wine and let the pleasant heat of the alcohol spread through him and show on his face. "My father is satisfied, too, if I am not mistaken."

"That's good."

Vimes tasted the alcohol carefully. After a few sips he could feel the slight redness spreading across his face as he shuddered pleasantly. His eyes began to get used to the darkness, and he could just make out the slightly hunched figure sitting next to him.

"When was the last time we met?"

"At your mother's funeral," said Vetinari. "The next day I was sent to the assassin's guild to start my studies."

"Hm."

There was yet another period of silence.

"And how is your dad-"

"Do you have to appear on balls yet? Considering you reached marriable-age."

"What are you talking about?!" Sam scoffed turning red and becoming even more flattered as he heard Vetinari's chuckle. "Very funny. But yes, sadly, I have to. Believe me, I don't enjoy it very much. Especially since Sybil is the only sane person there who I can talk to. The Rust family is the worst."

"How so?"

"I think they're trying to be friendly."

"Don't trust them"

Vimes snorted and rolled his eyes. "Like I would ever."

Vetinari nodded silently. He was trying to swallow his slight nervousness and suppress it just like he did with his other feelings. Ever since he started to study to be an assassin, he hadn't been able to move around in the city as much as he wanted. Without that he hasn’t been able to keep his eye on everything. This was to his father's delight no doubt, he was always focused on keeping up the legacy.

They sipped slowly from the wine, letting time wash over them. Vetinari sometimes glanced towards the window or checked the shadows for anyone hiding in them. He knew he haven't been followed, but he could never be absolutely sure.

"Things could be better."

Vetinari turned his gaze towards Vimes and waited. He knew there was more to it.

"With a different Patrician, I mean. Maybe, if someone would really care about all those crimes, and find a better way. Even this city has rules."

There was a small chuckle.

"What? It could work, I know I'm an idealist, but it could really work. With a different system."

"What I would call you indeed starts with an "id-", Vimes."

The younger man barely held back a scoff, but his face turned became slightly pinker, and not just from the wine.

"The city is changing," said Vetinari.

"But not in a good way."

There was a silence, they could hear the city's dull noises.

"Well, if Lord Winder manages to piss someone off properly, then, when the time is right I'll be able to do something. However, if you ask me, the past will just repeat itself."

His words had a kind of edge that even Vimes noticed.

"I really don't know what to say about that."

"Then don't," said Vetinari.

"But maybe it could be done differently."

"You, really are an idealistic idiot."

Vimes now actually scoffed and drank another glass of wine. Finally, he sighed, and he too stared out the window. "Do you want to be an assassin?"

He didn't get an answer.

"Sorry. I just...you don't seem too happy."

"Then how do I seem to you?"

Vimes shrugged. Again, he really didn't know what to say. He didn't see that as Vetinari looked at him, an idea began to form in the assassin's mind.

"The city could be better." Vetinari surprised even himself when he began talking. Well, no turning back from now.

"What?"

"You just said it. Maybe it needs an idealistic idiot, like you."

"You just had to call me an idiot, don't you? And what do you mean someone like me? I'm not good at with politics and aristocrats."

"But you can learn it." Vetinari's voice had a smiling tone in it. He noted to himself that he hasn’t received an immediate 'no'. The younger man, next to him, seemed to be immersed in his thoughts.

"Well," he said after a while.

"Yes?"

"It wouldn't be easy," Vimes said. "I would have to learn a lot and kiss a lot of butts." Grimacing, he emptied his glass once more. When he spoke again, his voice became more determined. "And I could only be a Patrician if I knew someone was watching my back."

"Oh, well in that case, I can assure you-"

"Within the law. Someone would watch me, within the law."

Vetinari raised an eyebrow, now he was looking straight into Vimes' eyes.

"What are you trying to say?"

"You could be a watchman."

"I beg your pardon?" Scoffed the assassin.

"With your knowledge and skills. You would be an ideal watchman." Repeated Vimes.

"Ideal for who?"

"For me, of course." He realized what he just said. "I-I mean, to be next to me. I would trust you; we grew up together. I know your father, and you knew my mum and dad. So, I could trust you. And this-" he made a vague gesture indicating the whole of the city. "It could be more...good. Better. Maybe it would work, really work. It would be fairer."

Vetinari didn't move, but the look in his eyes and the sound of his voice softened a little. "You idealistic idiot."

"So? It's a deal then? If you become a watchman, I'll be the Patrician." He added after thinking for a second. "Somehow."

They locked gazes for a minute.

"All right, it's a deal." Said Vetinari, and for the first time in a long time, he let himself truly smile.

 Vetinari refilled the cups.

"It's a shame I didn't see your face when you got my letter. And when you found out I kept myself to our agreement."

"Oh, you didn't see my face?" Said Vimes with a barely hidden smile. Despite looking into the commander's eyes, he was unable to read anything from them.

"Of course not, my lord. Since our deal was to watch over you once when you've become the Patrician."

The patrician shook his head, still amused by the memories. "Well, it was surprising. And as you see, I did keep my word." He gestured around the office. "It did take some time, but it worked. But what I'm sorry about is that I didn't see the face of guild teachers when they found out you were joining Night Watch."

"Well, I am pretty sure I almost gave them a heart attack. On the other hand, I did offer them something to keep them busy." Vetinari glanced at him one last time, before he turned his eyes towards to his cup and finished his tea.

"You mean, they immediately put big price on your head but were unable to get rid of you no matter how hard they tried?"

"They've often said I was being a rather ungrateful student." Lord Vimes allowed himself a small chuckle, and so did Vetinari a smile. They really had a history behind both of them. But even that night, he was already aware. He let his blue eyes rest on the face of the ruler, and seen him turning serious.

"I'm sorry." Said Vimes finally, pushing aside his emerging guilt so he could speak.

"Sir?"

"Your father, I didn't think he would..."

"Kick me from the family because I don't follow the tradition of becoming a professional assassin?" He waved it off. "It's not your fault, and you were right back there. I didn't want to be an assassin anyway."

Vimes' cup stopped on his way towards his lips.

"Sir?"

The lord of the city took a small sip. "Nothing. I'm glad that you chose something different. And better."

"So am I, sir." He glanced at the man. "Did I ever tell you that after my father disowned me, Sybil immediately tried to convince her dad that they should adopt me?"

Vimes had to cough when accidentally breathed in tea instead of air. "She did what?!"

 Of course while they talked, the letter was with them, hidden in one of the Patrician's desk. It was stored with outmost care, but it did develop a few creases from handling.

It had the following two words written in it:

'Your turn.

H.V. '

[samisadeangirl]

Have you noticed how all the blogs in that so called nazi block-list are anti misha and consistently post anti misha content? Notice how that rollthebeautifuldean person is on a crusade to target these blogs but has barely any posts condemning hellers who legitimately post death wishes. Makes me suspect their intentions.

I'm not American. I have different political opinions/leanings. I come from a different culture. I'm not white if that matters. It feels like people like me are unwelcome in this fandom because I tend to have "wrong" opinions and don't subscribe to groupthink. I agree racism is bad (so are Nazis) but the thing is, I differ with the definition of what constitutes racism. A lot of "you're nazi" examples sound similar to "you're homophobic for not shipping destiel" accusations.

I'm also baffled by people who blindly believed and started blocking people without reaching out first. Perhaps it's a reflection of current cancel culture but it made me sad. I've felt unwelcome in this fandom for a while but now I'm genuinely thinking of leaving because I don't want to be labelled "nazi/white supremacist/whatever" by people I consider my friends simply for having a different perspective.

Hi there Anon,

Oh yes, it's hardly a coincidence that all the blogs that asshole called out were anti-Misha, anti-Destiheller, and Jared-leaning or bibro blogs, or that their wife tried to do a blanket call-out against anti-Heller Jared fans a couple of days before. Both obviously have an agenda or at least a bias, and there are a number of folks who suspect that they're actually Hellers themselves since their behavior is eerily similar. I have my doubts simply because it's hard to believe such clearly immature and idiotic people would be capable of playing the long game by setting up these blogs for several months, but who knows? It's certainly rather suspect that the blog making those accusations is suddenly empty of content . . .

I can understand how you could be feeling alienated and disheartened by what's been going on, but please try to keep in mind that these assholes are a very small minority of the fandom who unfortunately happen to be very loud. We have ample evidence over the years from the various polls, surveys, and petitions they've touted to try to "prove" how numerous they are that Destihellers in fact number in only the few thousand, which means they make up <1% of the overall SPN audience of >2M viewers. Even on Tumblr, they make up <15% of the SPN blogs here from what I've heard. Hellers are generally the only ones who attack other fans as racist, homophobic, or whatever for having different opinions than they do, while most of the rest of the fandom is far more open-minded about people with different backgrounds and opinions. There are plenty of people I follow and interact with who are from other countries, who are POC, queer, disabled, etc., who have different beliefs, political leanings, etc.--but we're all united in our love of SPN and its characters. :)

I do agree that it was wrong that some people accepted those accusations without questions, and they should feel ashamed of themselves for blindly jumping to conclusions. Unfortunately it seems like whenever some drama starts, there are always gullible sheeple who make assumptions and take sides with little to no proof. Sadly that's human nature in general, and the current cancel culture does make it worse.

Still, like I said I think there are more decent people in the SPN fandom than bad ones, though of course you need to do what you feel is best for yourself, even if that means taking a break or leaving the fandom all together. If it would help, please feel free to send me more asks or reach out through DMs to talk.

[lemonsandstrawberries]

Just You and Me

fandom: Stony (Steve x Tony)

summary: After an argument, some emotions have to cool down. And when they cool down, only longing is left. In simpler words - Tony and Steve had an argument that got out of hand and Steve is feeling remorseful.

length: 1 235 words

a/n: just you know, some hurt and comfort and a happy ending to help us get through the rest of the week! based on this prompt. hope you like it! based on a prompt requested on my tumblr. hope you enjoy the fic, likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated and needed!

————

Just You and Me

If Steve had to point out which piece of furniture he hated the most, it would be a couch.

It was good neither for sitting, not having proper support for arms, neither for laying down comfortably on the narrow, often too short space. And don't get him even started on the pillows, which were solely for decorative purposes and not fit to use.

Couches were the worst. The couch in his and Tony's living room was the worst. Steve felt like setting it on fire.

It wasn't their couch's fault that he and Tony got in a massive argument over something stupid and Steve was banned to sleep in the living room. Steve just needed to take out his anger on something, and well, he had only the couch to do that.

The couch he and Tony liked to sit on and watch TV, Tony somehow always ending with his butt in Steve's lap, despite plenty of room left. Their couch wasn't that narrow but sometimes seemed so, whenever Steve walked on Tony napping and Steve just had to slot himself between Tony and the backrest, just to be close to his boyfriend. Their couch was also perfect for the times when Steve liked to read books and could sit comfortably, Tony's head resting in his lap, while his boyfriend kept working on a tablet or on his phone. To be honest, Steve loved their comfortable couch as it brought him and Tony many moments of closeness.

Just he would love more to be in bed with Tony, than alone on the couch. The anger in him was slowly fading away, a feeling of emptiness and longing taking its place. The thing they argued about didn't seem important anymore, and the only thing that mattered was that he really, really missed Tony, even if he knew that his boyfriend was just a room away, probably already sleeping, curled under the covers. He squeezed one of the decorative pillows closer, one that was carefully selected by Tony to match the couch and the living room, wishing that he was holding his boyfriend in his arms instead. Steve felt like a piece of him was missing. It was an unpleasant, cold feeling, twisting his stomach and not letting him rest.

Steve took his phone from the coffee table and looked at the hour. It was well after midnight so he kept tossing on the couch for almost two hours. He stood up and patted the couch tenderly, apologizing quietly for the previous offense, and walked in the darkness in the direction of his and Tony's bedroom. Slowly, Steve opened the door, some soft light illuminating the room and in the middle of the bed, still awake, was Tony. After noticing Steve in the doorway, he sat up, the covers falling a little bit, showing his naked torso.

"Hey," Tony said, smiling tiredly and sadly, no trace of previous anger in his voice or posture.

"Hey," Steve said back, walking to the bed. He kneeled next to his boyfriend and put both hands on his cheeks. "Babe, I am sorry," Steve apologized, hating to see how much he wounded his lover.

"I know," Tony accepted the apology, a sad smile not leaving his face. "I am sorry too."

"So, can I come back to bed?" Steve asked, making his voice lighter to try and brighten the atmosphere.

Tony laughed, his voice sounding a little wet and eyes still having this moist look. "I never said you can't."

Steve looked at Tony, not understanding at first. Oh, right. Tony didn't kick him out. It was Steve who decided that it all was too much and had stormed out, anger dictating his moves and he needed to get away before things could escalate.

"I am sorry for leaving you," Steve apologized again, kissing Tony's forehead and getting in bed, Tony making room for him, just to come closer when Steve lay down. Their legs tangled together and Tony put his head in the crook of Steve's neck, arms wrapped around each other, locking them in place.

"You kinda did what I asked for," Tony admitted in a small voice. "Just in wrong circumstances."

Slowly it came back to him. Tony yelling about Steve following him during Avengers missions and not giving him any space to work. Steve shouting back that he only wanted to keep him safe. More screaming that Iron Man didn't need a bodyguard and Steve yelling that Tony's fighting style was too reckless and he was just a regular guy in an expensive suit of armor and Tony snapped, pointing out that not everyone was an obedient, perfect soldier. They both said things that hurt but never meant to push the other away.

"Well," Steve brushed his cheek on Tony's fluffy hair, "you know how to be a pain in my ass," he said in humor and felt a warm puff of air on his neck and the way Tony's shoulders rose and fell with a short laugh. "Just for the record, I am never again giving you any space," Steve growled, his words colored with some playful tones.

"Oh, never again, huh?" Tony asked, looking at Steve, his eyes sparkling in humor, accepting the invitation to play. They both needed that moment of silly closeness. "And how do you plan to do that?"

"I am just gonna keep you here. With me," Steve explained, tightening his hold a little bit around Tony, making him wheeze on purpose. "Just you and me on this bed, forever."

"And what if you need to use the bathroom?" Tony asked with a laugh, seeing some major flaws in the plan.

"We will use adult diapers," Steve grinned.

"Ewww," Tony laughed, his nose scrunching in disgust. That was one mental image he didn't need to picture. "What if you get hungry?"

"Oh, I have everything I need to keep me sustained right here," Steve said in a dark voice, shamelessly groping Tony's round butt with one hand.

Tony hissed in slight pain but grinned in the end. Steve used to freely express his love for Tony's bubble butt and that always made Tony feel good.

"What if you get bored?" Tony continued asking, just testing how more creative Steve could get.

"With you? Never," Steve leaned down, placing a slow, almost biting kiss on his lover's lips, Tony was happy to receive and take part in. "This will keep me entertained."

At first, Tony thought that Steve meant kissing. He would be very happy if Steve meant kissing. Instead, five fingers were running up and down his side in quick movements, digging in his soft skin.

"H-hey!" Tony protested, trying to wriggle away, laughter taking over him too quickly. "Nonono hahahaha STEVE!"

"Just you and me, Tony," Steve smiled, keeping Tony trapped in his arms and using both hands to tickle whichever ticklish spot he could reach on his boyfriend and there was a lot of them. "You and me," Steve repeated, and as quickly as tickling started, soon it ended, Steve ending his play with a deep kiss, that lasted and lasted until Tony became limp in his arms, pressing back to Steve and never wanting to lose that feeling.

Of course, they didn't stay in the bed forever but did have a lot more shared sweet moments both in bed and on the couch and wherever they found suitable.

[lovelivingmydreams]

Paper Flowers: Assumptions

People make snap judgements all the time. About fictional characters as well as the people in their lives. It gets dangerous however when you assume your perception is the truth.

“Hello all you Fanders out there!” the voice over of DarkStarlight sounds through your speaker as the screen shows the title card of their series Fanders illustrated. The concept is simple enough. They talk about things from Thomas’ content or the fan community they liked while showing speeddraws based on it. It’s really fun to see.

“So a while ago I made this drawing based on the names we picked for the Prince’s nemesis.”

The image changes to a drawing of two versions of the character standing back to back. The dark, mischievious Marcus against a dark red background, and the awkward blushy Kevin against a lighter blue, the collors mixing to purple in the center.

“And the comments have been wild!” A blank canvas is shown as they start sketching.

“There were several theories about how these two boys could be one and the same.

The theory I want to draw today is a cute one. So CatPrincess suggested Marcus is an act Kevin puts up to help the prince. Kevin, according to her, is a staff member of the palace. And when the Prince got old enough to start looking for a princess, he needed an excuse, since he’s gay or just not really interested in romance. He never really was invested in any princesses in the vines after all. He’s had the most chemistry with males. Prince is gay confirmed.”

You chuckle. And shake your head. This fandom is wild. You just hope the characters can make a transition to youtube. It seems like Vine’s time is really coming to an end.

“Anyway, so whether the prince knows it or not CatPrincesss didn’t say, but Kevin ends up disguising himself as a villain so Prince can say he’s busy defending the realm and that he can’t pursue any Princesses until the villain is defeated. I really like the idea of Prince and Kevin having little inside jokes and grinning at each other secretly while Kevin tends to the family during dinner as they hear the king and queen complain about the villain. So. What do you think?”

And just like that the drawing is done. It’s Prince and a formally dressed Kevin glancing at each other with subtle smirks while behind them their silhouettes are crossing swords.

You like and share the video before checking in on tumblr, you still have some time to kill before dinner.

 “I don’t see why we even bother still making vines every day. We’re finished, it’s over,” Virgil muttered as he paced the floor of the common area. He really hated being the barer of bad news, but no one was coming to terms with this simple fact.

“We have sworn to entertain the fanders, and it is not over until the fat lady sings,” Roman explained calmly from his spot, draped over the couch, pretending to be more interested in his notes for the ultimate storytime tour.

The announcement had taken the internet by storm and even Virgil was excited, though he never showed that to the others. He couldn’t leave his room for five days because he couldn’t stop ‘sparkling’ as Roman had come to call his excited look. Just in his head though, he was fairly sure Virgil wouldn’t appreciate it.

“What are we going to do after!?” Virgil insisted.

“We could look for a real job?” Logan suggested though he wasn’t very hopeful.

Virgil was nodding to himself, that was an option he supposed.

“We could make more scripted youtube video’s? People have been commenting they wished they could see more of our characters than six second skits?” Patton suggested.

“Brilliant idea Padre!” Roman exclaimed as he sat up and started skribling.

“We could make a series about the dad and teacher! Liam, Fiona and Gavin might like participating… Oh, and we could make marvelous stories about the prince… Idea!!!!”

He jumped up and made a gesture towards all of them. “We could make a series about us!” he declared proudly. “The fanders want to know more about Thomas, what better way to talk about that than by showing them who we are!?”

Patton was clapping excitedly while Logan and Virgil seemed apprehensive.

“Oh, that sounds so fun!!!” the fatherly side cheered.

“I don’t know,” Virgil objected. “It feels too exposed.”

“Indeed, we are a very personal part of Thomas. We should not be shown to the world so carelessly,” Logan agreed, mostly opposed to being displayed as a source of entertainment for others.

“We don’t have to go all in right away. Thomas can start with acting like our vine counterparts and see how the fanders react and if they like the idea we slowly but surely let our real selves shine through. Little steps,” Roman suggested.

Logan cocked his head. “That was, a very well thought out solution…” he admitted. It was odd. When had this started? Roman usually just spat out ideas and took any criticism as a personal offence. When did he start taking feedback into consideration?

Roman gasped and brought a hand to his heart in offence. “Don’t sound so surprised!” he huffed.

“I don’t know…” Virgil said slowly. The fanders liked his character… But that guy wasn’t literal anxiety.

Roman sighed dramatically. “Tell you what. I draft up some ideas. And after the tour we can revisit the subject. Vine won’t disappear overnight,” he reasoned.

Logan and Patton nodded in agreement. “Fine,” Virgil relented before pulling his hoodie over his head and stalking off.

Patton frowned. “He’s never happy is he?” he muttered sadly. Roman bit back his reaction. Patton was both wrong and right. This part of Virgil couldn’t be happy. But Roman knew of other parts that could be the happiest out of all of them. Happier than even Patton could ever hope being.

“Well who’s fault is that?” A voice drawled from the door opening. Roman automatically drew his sword while Patton and Logan reflexively moved to stand a little more behind him.

“Such a warm reception, I’m so touched,” Deceit said, hand on his heart, a sarcastic sting to his voice and a roll of his eyes.

"Well," Roman huffed as he put away his sword. "Maybe if you didn't apparate in dark corners for no good reason we wouldn't assume an attack was imminent. You are lucky you just missed anxiety, he might not have been able yo hold himself back." Realy what was that snake thinking?

"Thanks for the concern Roman, but other than you three, I know how to handle him."

Roman once more bit his tongue. Keeping his promise not to reveal their bond has never been so hard. This particular side was much more likely to catch him evading and omitting.

He rolled his eyes dramatically and crossed his arms in front of him. "Is there anything you needed Deceit?" Patton asked as he stepped forward laying a soothing hand on Roman's arm.

"Just checking in. And I must say I am not impressed. Morality I had hoped you'd put in a little more effort to make Anxiety comfortable up here. At this rate I might have to take him back with me." Roman could feel Patton cringe at that. That's it. Virgil's friend or not, Roman would not let him upset his family.

“Oh drop it scaleface. Empty threats will only go so far,” he said with a hand on his hip and a roll of his eye.

“Who says they’re empty?” Deceit drawled, studying his nails. “The whole reason Anxiety came up here was to reduce his stress, but if you all just keep making him unhappy, what is the point?” Deceit wondered calmly, though Roman could see there was a vague annoyed pull at his eyes. He clearly did not like being questioned.

“If he really was as unhappy as you imply, then why hasn’t he gone back to you and Remus who supposedly know how to ‘handle him’ so much better?” There was a mild flinch in Deceit’s posture, making Roman wondered if he accidently hit a nerve somehow.

“Just say what you came here for, Deceit. We all have other things to do.” Because deceit was rarely straightforward. Virgil hadn’t told him much about living down there, but that much he’d learned.

Janus just huffed and left.

“Charming as always!” Roman huffed as he combed his fingers through his hair.. He let out a sigh and dropped his hand before looking down at Patton.

“Are you alright Padre?” he wondered.

“I… Yes actually. Thank you Roman…” Roman wanted to bid the two bespectacled sides a good day and start writing on the new series and finish of his ideas for the tour, but the he noticed Patton was biting his lip nervously and so he waited.

“Do you really think… he’s not going to take Anxiety back is he?”

Roman smiled warmly down at Patton before turning to Logan. “Logan, could Thomas ‘forget about anxiety’ at this point?” he asked.

Logan cocked his head confused. “No, denying Anxiety is a part of Thomas, the way Thomas refused to acknowledge his presence in the past, is not possible. Deceit does not have the power to force such a change. Only if the three of us were to agree to it, could something like that be accomplished. And I do not intent to participate in such endeavor,” Logan stated. Patton relaxed at that.

“And I suppose I have gotten used to our war of wits. I shan’t permit him to leave until I reign victorious! Speaking of victory! I’m off writing a script so brilliant the fanders will demand more!”

And with that he finally did make his exit.

He returned to his room and immediately started on his projects. He was not sure what Deceit was trying to accomplish, but it would not deter him from his mission.

In the commons Logan has left as well and Patton his tidying up. Trying not to let Deceit’s words get to him… Who’s fault was it? His? Roman’s? Was there another thing he was missing?

At the border of the conscious mind Janus was beyond annoyed. It didn’t really matter. The idea of failure was planted, and if he knew the lights at all it’s that they would try harder to make Virgil feel comfortable, if only to prove him wrong. Virgil would not like that Janus had gotten involved, but he was worried. How couldn’t he be? Over the past few month’s Virgil had been acting off. Sure he was being more sociable, but after every interaction he was so rained he more or less disappeared. That was the only explanation Janus had for the times he’d visited to make sure he was alright and find the room empty. He hadn’t brought it up with Virgil, since doing so would most likely end up being more about him entering Virgil’s room without permission rather than an actual explanation.

And it didn’t really matter. Janus knew one thing with unwavering certainty.

If the lights didn’t get their act together, they might lose him.

Next: momceit

[misterewrites]

Intro to Jaime 101 and a Half

Hey everyone! E here hoping you are all good. It's time for a new chapter of Mirror's Edge! Haha been a while huh? I was actually writing a mini arc for welcome to an Underground cuz it felt right you know? Better to get all that put together and squared away. And now that that's done, here we are.

Umm the next thing I write will either be another's Mirror's Edge chapter, the last intro chapter before I get into actual story arcs or maybe some fandom stuff I haven't decided. 

Anyway, I hope you are all safe, sound, keeping your loved ones safe too, wear a mask, wash your hands, vaccinate yourself if you can, push to release the vaccines world wide and be careful. Have an amazing week and see you soon with a new chapter and or story! feel free to leave likes, reblog, comments and recommend this to your friends! I appreciate it, enjoy!!

Here’s the chapter over at a03 if you wanted have an easier time reading cuz tumblr hates me!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30599756/chapters/80953405

Here’s the story from the beginning if you’re curious what’s it all about

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30599756/chapters/75486005

And here’s a link to all my stories 

https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrE42/pseuds/MrE42

Summary:  Jaime, adoptive sister of Finnrick and fiancée of Casey, is late to work. The Grimoire, magical library and hub of all knowledges is her workplace and she has thrown herself into it completely for whatever reason. Still with Casey lingering on her mind, she can't help but feel torn between her love of books and the love of her life.

-----

As Jaime hurried away from Willow’s Rook and Casey, she couldn’t help but feel disappointed in herself. She told herself under no circumstances she would see her fiancée but one glance towards his office and Jaime was knocking on his door without a second thought. A ten minute conversation later and now she was late to work.

She sighed, glancing downward towards the engagement ring snugly wrapped around her finger.

Jaime’s heart raced beyond her control as her fingers tingled with the warmth Casey’s cheek. She could still feel the pulsing of their hearts beating in time with one another, love and longing palpable in that moment.

“Jaime, why do you do this to yourself?” she murmured sadly “You said don’t see him. You said don’t visit him. You said you could handle this whole break and now we’re late.”

Jaime picked up her pace, power walking in hopes somehow that could shave off the seconds she desperately needed to avoid being reprimanded: The Grimoire may have been a library but it had a strict late policy both on books and personal.

-----

The Grimoire was as elegant as it was ancient: The library was one of the oldest buildings in Newton Haven, constructed when the city was little more than a mile of stacked bricks among swampland. Faded red stone archways and columns did nothing to belittle the power and importance of the Grimoire. Even the mundane folk could feel the magical force that radiated from within, a fantastic world beyond the threshold.

Of course there was a fantastic world hidden inside: The library was one of the major hubs for the magical community and it wasn’t uncommon to see various races searching the many bookshelves for whatever subject tickled their fancy.

The interior was elegant and timeless: The walls and floors were soothing shades of brown with furniture pulled from all eras of human history. Three stories of endless knowledge about countless subjects. Translucent spirits hurried back and forth, humming happily in death as they did in life while they performed their duties to the Grimoire. In the center, amid the hustle and bustle, stood a spiraling staircase that disappeared beyond the ceiling to the Librarian’s office.

There, just past the entrance and to the side, was a security desk with a figure lazily sitting upon it: He was humanoid, muscular and impossibly large, easily seven feet tall. His skin was gray as storm clouds and his eyes shone with an electric blue shade. His hair and beard were frosted white like he dove face first into snow. His uniform consisted of a dark blue buttoned up collared shirt that was one flex from tearing in two and old rugged jeans. His black combat boots were immaculately cleaned as he placed them on the surface of the desk.

He clicked his tongue as he slowly turned the page on the latest romance novel he had been enthralled by.

“Sinclair, you’re late.” He spoke softly but even a whisper couldn’t stop his voice from reverberating throughout the hall.

Passerby’s shot confused glances at one another but no one stopped at Dusty’s declaration

The storm giant sighed, rubbing his eyes tiredly “Sinclair, you’re not fooling anyone.”

Silence and more quizzical glances.

Dusty shook his head, disappointed as he snapped his finger.

The air smelled of fresh rain while a source-less thunder boomed overhead. Nearby, a person, previously invisible, flickered into existence. Their previously camouflaged self changed into a rainbow of colorful hues before bursting into a flurry of sea green sparks and revealing a sheepish Jaime, her hands raised in defeat.

“Sinclair.” Dusty’s voice was dry yet amused.

Jaime clasped her hands together as she made her way over to the storm giant’s desk “Dusty! I...”

“Am late.” he finished for her, a gentle chuckle escaping his throat “Remington again?”

“Whaaaaaa?” Jaime’s face scrunched into a false sense of surprise “No, no. Come on. Me and Casey are….well you see…..it’s frankly none of your business.”

Dusty nodded wisely “True. It is none of my business. Go on before I sic the ghosts on you.”

Jaime gave a quick curtsy before running as quickly as she could. Dusty rolled his eyes before returning to his romance novel he was previously captivated with.

-----

Everyone who worked in the Grimoire had their own personal office tucked away somewhere to ensure privacy for personal studies. Jaime’s office was in the back of the library, hidden behind the alchemy section. It was one of the wider offices, more akin to a school class room. True to her wizard background, it was messy: Piles of folders, books left open and hastily scribbled papers were sprawled about. A fairly sized cauldron sat ontop of her desk, currently not in use. Sticky notes littered randomly across the walls. And like any true wizard, a magical circle was engraved directly into the center of the room for varying purposes.

Despite the appearance of her lair, she was actually one of the more organized of wizards. Even her prodigal brother Finn’s lair wasn’t as well maintained and cataloged as her. Though, to be fair, she did have help most wizards didn’t.

Jaime placed her bag by the door, eyes searching about for her helper.

“Bartholomew! Bartholomew Ringtail, you here?”

A moment past before the sound of rustling papers and scuttling paws could be heard. Jaime reached into her pack and pulled out a bag of popcorn just in time for Bartholomew reach out for the treat.

Bartholomew Ringtail, like his name suggested, was raccoon. Light gray fur, little black mask over his snout and tiny adorable paws. However, unlike most of his kind, wore a small cap upon his head and that made him cuter than the average raccoon.

Well that and the fact he was magical.

While her brother was a master practitioner of powerful protective wizardry, Jaime’s skills lay elsewhere as a conjurer. Her strength came in summoning powerful familiars to further her goals.

Normally a wizard would have to spend time preparing the ritual, collecting the materials related to whatever being they were trying to bring onto this plane. Demons, angels, fey, constructs of strange and alien machinery from beyond human understanding. Anything could be summoned if you had the proper knowledge and power.

Normally such rituals would take hours if not days to perform: Time to gather magical energies, to search the planes of reality for your being of choice and of course drag it kicking and screaming to you. Also summons were temporary as beings not native to the plane could only be sustained by whatever magic brought them. Much like a timer, the magic would slowly fade and once empty any being summoned are forcibly returned from whence they came.

Jaime was much faster and more persuasive in her summoning spell casting. She could do it in a matter of minutes as opposed to days though it still required a massive amount of magical energy, Unlike other wizards, conjurer summons did not decay over time. Whatever they brought into this world stayed in this world unlike magic could no longer maintain their form, usually from being attacked over and over.

Bartholomew was one such creature. In fact Bartholomew was Jaime’s first summon back when she was a fledgling wizard being trained by her brother. She wasn’t hundred percent where exactly he came from but she was grateful for her longtime companion and friend.

Bartholomew popped open the popcorn bag and hurriedly began to stuff handful of the tasty snack into his waiting maw.

Jaime smiled brightly before glancing about room, quietly complementing which project to continue.

A wizard’s magic was as much studying as it was practice.

Finnrick once described the difference between wizards and other casters as using a phonebook. The others were given a phonebook by some higher power. The numbers were already written down and set. However, they could only use those numbers and each different caster had different numbers for different purposes.

Wizards, on the other hand, no such phonebook. They have work hard, study and call each number to understand what the number did. Aside from being tutored by other wizards or spellbooks or other sources of knowledge, the wizard must discovered and write down the numbers on their own, creating their own phone book. Of course that meant wizards weren’t as limited as the other casters and were free to discover a possible infinite amount of spells.

Jaime took a step forward when a voice called out to her.

“Hey sis!”

Jaime whirled around to find the smiling face of her brother Finnrick, fedora in one hand and a friendly wave in the other.

“FINNY!” Jaime cheered, racing forward and wrapping her brother in a tight hug.

Finnrick laughed before returning the gesture “Hey Jai, how you doing?”

“Good” Jaime broke away “Great even! I was just about to practice my spells. I’m still having trouble.”

“Sis.” Finnrick’s voice became firm “It’s visual as much as it is feeling.”

“I know, I know” Jaime shifted uneasily under his gaze “It’s just I usually just bring in heavy hitters, not be one.”

“Any wizard can stick to their strengths. Great wizards are well versed in all forms magic. Spar?”

Jaime gave a crooked smile “Loser buys lunch.”

“And dinner” he cockily added.

Jaime motioned to the circle but Finnrick was already on it. Clasping his hands, Finnrick murmured something too softly for her to hear then pushed his arms outward. A blue dome formed over the two, encasing them in a makeshift arena.

Jaime took her place opposite of her brother “Ready?”

“Sisters first.”

Jaime closed her eyes. She imagined a flame in the palm of her hand. She imagined the heat from the flame. She imagined how it shifted back and forth with a gentle breeze. She saw it clearly in her mind’s eye and then she willed it into reality

“Inferus!” Jaime shouted, her hands glowing with a sea green glow. The flame burst into existence, just as she created. She pulled her arm back and lobbed it with as much force as towards her brother.

Finnrick didn’t budge an inch while flame sailed his way. He rose his hand calmly and with a mighty swing, backhanded and sent the flame skittering across the floor.

Finnrick didn’t waste any time in his counter attack. His finger tips gleamed with blue magical energy and with a flick forward, unleashing a barrage of icicles.

Jaime outstretched her hand forward, sea green glyph forming in the air. A thin matching barrier appeared in front of her in time to catch the first of the icy attack but as the rest collided, cracks began to widen and spread with each successive blow.

“Don’t fight like me Jaime!” Finnrick scolded, sending another wave of icy daggers.

The barrier hadn’t lasted under the second barrage: The moment an icicle collided with her shield, it broke, scattering and fading out of existence.

Jaime, however, was prepared. She ducked and weaved under the attack, pivoting her heels like a graceful dancer while moving her way out of the line of fire.

Jaime twirled about, gathering the magic in her hands before sending outward. Long streams of flames began to swirl about like tendrils reaching for prey as she spun about.

Finnrick gestured at her with a finger gun and clicked his tongue, bringing down his thumb like a hammer of a gun. Jaime’s eyes widened with surprise as she felt some foreign entity began to shift and make her spell uneven. She tried to maintain it but Finnrick’s surge of magic was too much for her. The magic she held exploded, the flames vanishing as the force of the spell breaking sent her sprawling to the floor.

Finnrick was already on the move, arching his arm backwards before throwing forward a bolt of lightning.

Jaime sprung to her feet, leaning as far back as she could to narrowly avoid attack. The lightning bolt struck the dome but before she could react, it bounced and struck her directly from behind.

Luckily it was a training session and only gave a her a light shove forward. Jaime flapped about wildly before she manged to get her balance steady.

“Game, set and match!” Finnrick beamed with a grin.

Jaime rolled her eyes “Big surprise my genius brother won. The dome’s so small I barely had room to move!”

“Exactly!”

Jaime shot her brother suspicious glare.

Finnrick rose his hands “Hey, never let your opponent dictate the field of battle if you can manage it.”

“Yeah, I should’ve seen that coming” Jaime sighed.

Finnrick made his way over and wrapped his sister in a loving one armed hug “Remember sis, real life has no rules.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Jaime nudged Finnrick’s ribs playfully “Whatever you say cheater.”

Finnrick ruffled his sister’s hair playfully “Life lessons are important to share to your siblings. Need help with anything?”

“Oh you better be spending time with me. After that thrashing you gave me, you owe me big.”

Finnrick stood up straight, hand raised in a lax salute.

Jaime responded by poking his stomach.

“Oww, I give I give!” Finnrick chuckled “Why must you resort to violence?”

“Family upbringing I guess.”

The two siblings fell into a peaceful quiet as they began shifting and searching through Jaime’s notes.

“Jaime?”

“Hmm?”

“Question.”

“Answer.”

“Any word on the big move?”

Jaime stopped, her hands hovering over a book.

“No” Jaime murmured weakly “No word yet. They’re still debating I guess.”

“Mhm” Finnrick replied without much else.

Jaime turned to her brother “Finn, I…”

Finnrick rose a hand to stop her “It’s your life. Your choice. If this is what you want, then I will be happy for you.”

“But?” Jaime added in.

Finnrick pursed his lips, running his finger down the spine of a nearby book “I want you to be content as well. I know you…..I mean….you’re still wearing the ring.”

Jaime glance down to her engagement ring. She could still feel Casey’s warmth underneath her fingertips, his heart beating rapidly in time with hers.

“Think about it” Finnrick said with a hint of finality “Life’s too random to live with regrets.”

“So” Jaime cleared her throat, desperate to change the subject “Any news on your angel?”

Silence.

“Finn?”

She found him fidgeting with his fingers, his cheeks blazing a bright red as he averted his gaze.

“Finn! You found her?! And you didn't tell me?!”

Finnrick gave a shy nod, biting his lips nervous.

Jaime lunged at him, wrapping her arms tightly around him in a loving embrace “That’s great bro! When am I meeting her?”

Finnrick turned to her, unsure what she meant “What?”

“When am I meeting her” she repeated.

“Umm….why?”

“To interrogate her of course!”

“Jaime!”

“What? Just cause you like her doesn’t mean I do.”

“Jaime, don’t you dare!”

“Try and stop me!”

Finnrick dove for her but Jaime saw it coming a mile away. She pivoted on her toes, twirling out of the way of Finnrick’s attack. As her brother began to chase her around the office, Jaime quietly enjoyed this moment between siblings.

She was going to miss this when she left Newton Haven behind.

[strwberrytae]

So Long, Farewell, and Goodbye For Now -

“I don’t know how you are so familiar to me—or why it feels less like I am getting to know you and more as though I am remembering who you are. How every smile, every whisper brings me closer to the impossible conclusion that I have known you before, I have loved you before—in another time, a different place, some other existence.”     - Lang Leav

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello, You ♡ Yes, You. You ethereal, beautiful being. I am writing to you with bittersweet yet wonderful news - depending on the perspective. I am writing this post to inform all of you that I will no longer be writing for this blog for the foreseeable future. What I mean by that is that I am not giving up writing forever, no. But my life has changed so much over the last two years, I do not see myself writing again for quite some time. But don’t worry! I will be back!

Below the Read More section, I have poured my heart and soul into the real reasons why I’ve made this decision. I warn you, it’s lengthy but it’s everything that has led up to this over the years. So, if you fancy, have a read. If not, I bid you farewell and wish you all the happiness in the world. Thank you for supporting me so far. I truly appreciate it and love you all very dearly. Now, if you wish to read it at a later time, I will have a link available on my page at all times for anyone who is curious. It’s a hell of a story if you ask me ~

Edit: Made by Me - also, a surprise photo at the end Warnings/Triggers: Talks of emotional abuse, depression, and suicide but also happiness and love -

When I first started this blog, it was 2016. I had been on Tumblr for over a decade now but BTS led me to writing passionately for 2 years. I was incredibly active and utterly consumed by this website. Not just for the writing, but I was so obsessed because of my friends and mutuals that I made along the way. Can I just say that I’ve met some incredible people on this platform - including my best friend and soulmate? Truthfully, the absolute best friend I have ever had. But more importantly, Tumblr was my greatest escape. I mean this website truly has been my saving grace through very dark times.

In that part of my life, I was in an extremely toxic relationship; by then, it was 6 years I was with him. He was emotionally abusive, had such a short-fuse temper, hated everyone I knew which led me never really seeing any of my friends after college, knew I was anorexic and did nothing to stop me, knew I had depression since we started dating and always argued it as if it wasn’t real, crushed my dreams and ambitions, mocked potential suicide attempts, expected me to just abandon all hope to ever leave home to explore someplace new or get a job that I actually love. He was...just the worst. Never hit me though, so I’m grateful for that. But sometimes I wish he would so it would have given me the voice I needed to get out of that relationship much sooner than I did. But regardless, because of him plus having a soul-sucking job that wore me down to the core, Tumblr was my escape. BTS was my escape.

I fell hard and I fell deep. I created a fantasy world within this world. All of my dreams, fantasies, desires, and hopes were poured into my writing. My imagination was running wild. My activity was through the roof because I was always on here day in and out, just pretending like the outside world didn’t exist. It consumed me...but I needed it. Looking back, it was pretty excessive. At the time, I seemed perfectly normal because everyone else was just as active and saying the same things and doing the same things. I felt a belonging, like I fit in.

But I hated the person I became. It took me getting yelled at, mocked, ridiculed, and belittled by my ex to snap me out of that illusion I built and back into reality. That was the roughest night that we had filled with lots of screaming on his end and crying on my part. He thought my obsession was sick. He thought it was disgusting. It all started because he found fake texts I had made with Jimin and Tae. Don’t recall the story it was a part of but he thought they were texts with the actual members… In my eyes, I should get credit for making them look so legit but he didn’t see it that way. He thought fangirling over men was essentially cheating. No matter how hard I tried to explain, he didn’t understand. But a part of his view was right. I learned that I was a bit too much into it and I really needed to take a step back from Tumblr for a while. So I did. I deactivated my account and disappeared for months. Also because he made me and threatened our relationship if I didn’t. Should have taken the out but ah well.

Just two months prior to this incident, I attempted suicide. Well, contemplated. Everything was planned out. Bought a hotel room for Thanksgiving night as I was working a super late shift until about 1-2am. My commute home was an hour long and I still had to come back to work at 7am. So I got a room. Brought a large amount of pills with me and I was going to call it. No notes written to friends, family, or loved ones. Nothing. I was done. Didn’t think anyone would miss me. I just figured the world would keep turning without me. I had thought about doing this several times before but this was my first time making plans for it. It was my lowest of the low. But then I met someone that night that changed my life entirely just in a 10 minute interaction of talking - nothing special. We’ll get to that later. But this person just gave me hope and to this day, I still can’t explain it. It was euphoric. I felt clarity. It was in that night that I thought I might hold out just a little bit longer.

And thus @strwberrytae was born - but it was far from the same. At first, I restarted the blog in secret. Why would I do this? Why would a 25 year old open a blog in secret? Well, two months after the awful fight, my ex proposed to me and I said yes. I know. Believe me, I know. I was scared. My depression was getting worse again. I no longer had an escape except for books. All I did was read so I had some sort of reality to be in besides my own. But returning to a brand new blog did not give the same satisfaction as returning to an old blog.

I worked so hard on my first blog and this redo, I tried to consider it as a gift. Perhaps this was a chance to start anew and rebrand myself. This optimism kept up for quite some time. Slowly, I added my favorite past works then added some new chapters. If you’ve been here with me since 2017, you would know that my appearance on Tumblr was still not the same. Then I got married in October.

An empty, loveless marriage that I regret to this day. Needless to say, my writing and activity on Tumblr was still practically non-existent as I was still too scared of getting caught. Even though he finally gave me permission to use it again because he could tell how miserable it was making me. Yes, gave me permission. Thankfully, it all ended after a year. I finally went to a therapist even though I hated them so much and all past therapists I had. She was pretty great. Within five sessions, I summoned the courage to break up with this guy. I was finally set free. Nearly 9 years together and I finally felt like I could breathe.

Unfortunately, although I was free, I had to live with the guy for about 5 months after the breakup. Which was beyond rough, believe me. Imagine someone writhing in pain and bawling their eyes out and venting non-stop about all of their faults and wrongdoings every single day. At the end of the day, as shitty as he was to me, he was my best friend too. We went through a lot of shit together and he did have some good sides to him too. So witnessing this was horrendous. Needless to say, I wasn’t getting much privacy either. Writing was not my top priority. Now it’s 2019 and things changed drastically for the better - and worst.

Remember the person I met in 2016 on Thanksgiving night? Well, that person is someone I crushed on every since that night. For 2 years. People, I’m telling you. He did absolutely nothing special that night. He didn’t flirt with me. He didn’t check me out. He didn’t do anything remotely to make a girl swoon but I was so drawn to him. The only word that could describe it was “cosmic” - beautifully cosmic. 

Well in January 2019, 2 months following my break up, he came into my store one day. And my god did he look incredible. He was dressed head to toe in black - a fitted black suit at that. He even wore this long, designer jacket to match. Hair shaved on the sides with beautiful, thick dark hair on top. So tall - 182cm. A smile that could kill; quite literally. The canines are on point. He looked like a five course meal. That day, he definitely flirted with me. By the end of the week, we had our first date. Sadly, I also lost my job in the same week and was unemployed for a year because no one would hire me. I was laid off and one of my seniors took my job. Of course, they needed to keep me around for the holidays and then give me the boot. I was devastated. I hated that job so much as it only aided in fueling my depression but losing it was definitely an amazing thing. And! I survived on my savings and definitely didn’t spend my time writing. I had life to sort out last year - like from the ground up. No worries though. I got a job in February 2020 and I love it, so it’s all good, baby. Now I’m in the health field and feel like I’m actually helping people, which I love.

Now, here we are 2 years later and I’m engaged to the man.  Someone who makes me smile everyday, believes in me, encourages me, let’s me be 100% myself, travels with me, taught me how to love myself, taught me to accept my body, gets me on a level that only my best friend could, and someone who goes above and beyond every single day to show me how much he loves me. Bonus, he welcomes my love for BTS with open arms, reads my writing, AND has even been sucked in himself to the fandom. Jungkook and Jimin, look out. You got another fanboy. I thought true love was impossible for me but I was very, very wrong.

He has shown me that I can be happy and I have finally experienced true happiness. When people ask how I’m doing, I don’t cringe and lie through my teeth. I smile and say that I am doing well because by George, I am. Everyone around me has seen me over the last two years and made the comment, “you look so much happier”. They meet him and swoon just as much as I do. Is he perfect? No, he’s not. He has flaws just like everyone else but he actually grows and learns from his mistakes to better himself. That’s what amazes me the most. Even if we argue, which is seldom, he refuses to let it go without resolution so we can always fix whatever the issue is. As we like to call it, we’re in-sync. In everything, we’re always so in-sync. I’m wildly in love, my dudes.

So, why am I not writing anymore? To put it simply, I’m happy and don’t really feel the desire to write anymore - at least not fanfiction. Even when I was super young, like elementary school, I used writing as an outlet for my dark escape. I wrote poetry primarily and by middle school, it turned to fanfiction for Supernatural, Simple Plan, and Panic! At The Disco. Along with a very long list of other bands and shows but anyways. I’ve been severely depressed since I was 15 and fanfiction put me in this hole that I couldn’t get out of. I relied on this method to help me get through all the bad shit I was dealing with. It was my coping mechanism.

Now? While depression never truly goes away as the lovely disease that it is, I am genuinely happy. Because of this, when I opened all of my past works and works in progress, I felt nothing but guilt. Guilt for not keeping up with my chapters or keeping my account active. I felt dread to have to escape in this world that I had created. I felt no joy or excitement. It was the strangest feeling that happened all in a matter of seconds. Thus leading to my final decision to take a step away from writing. Do I still love it? Absolutely. But now I think I’m going to re-route and focus my writing on what I love - reality. I’m going to get back into journaling and write essays about love and beauty as I’ve always loved to do. But for escaping into a fantasy world? I don’t know when I’ll be back.

Now I know what you’re thinking. “But you can write and be happy!” Nah fam. Writing has been my aid through dark times and now I mostly associate it with those dark times. And for once in my life, I feel this desire to enjoy reality and remain in it - with the exception of journaling here and there. Even daydreaming is difficult. It’s strange. I love my reality. This sounds like gloating now but it’s truly a remarkable feeling. When you’ve been battling depression for 15 years, it feels really freaking nice to say that I’m happy.

So that’s why I’m taking a break - in a very long, drawn out way. But my hope was that after this long story, you might understand truly why I am doing this. It would have been easier to just say that writing doesn’t bring me joy anymore but I feel that I owe more than that; especially because I really don’t know if I’ll write for this blog ever again. The last time I took a break, I disappeared without being able to explain myself and I wanted to do so now that I have the chance.

Ultimately, thank you to everyone who has stuck by me over the years. It’s truly been one hell of a rollercoaster. The friends I’ve made on here have seen me at my lowest of the lows. But hey! I’ll still be around. I just won’t be publishing or continuing any of my works anywhere in the near future. Seriously though. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. This website has helped me tremendously and I’ll never forget it. Besides, there’s lots of other exciting things happening in my life now so you’ll certainly see me pop in here and there to talk about it ♡

If you wish, you can message me for questions or anything you want to know. I’m an open book - at least about most things hehe. And don’t worry. I still very much love Taehyung and still wildly obsessing over how marvelous he is. Umf.

(here’s some recent photos of me as i rarely take selfies anymore haha. and a derp photo of me and the man i love >_< why is the cutest photo of him with the worst photo of me? still cute though hehe)

[evienyx]

"I’m quite sure that I’m not bringing Jet back, and if I do he’ll barely even be there, but who knows, I might. Just don’t count on it if you really like Jet." - Evie, Queen of the Plot twists. On that note, I can't wait for Jet to get there, and suddenly Kya's yelling in his face, and he's just sitting there like, "Katara?" Jet looks at Hakoda and is like, "What happened to you guys?" Also *glances around nervously* I honestly like Fractures better than MuffinLance's work, which is still great.

One of the beauties of Avatar being (technically) a children’s show is that all of the deaths are rather ambiguous, making it very easy for me to swoop in and be like ‘naw they lived.’ 

The mental image of Jet arriving at the Fire Nation to Kya and Hakoda and thinking they’re Katara and Sokka is amazing, by the way.

Kya, hitting Jet with a stick: Stop! Trying! To! Kill! The! Fire! Lord!

Hakoda, standing to the side, watching: Try an uppercut, honey.

Jet, sobbing in confusion: When did you guys get so old? How long was I on that boat???

And that final statement, too. I have some things to say on that, and none of this is gonna be coherent but here you go, anyway.

I’ve found myself being compared to @muffinlance a lot, lately. 

It makes sense, of course. We’re both modern ATLA fic writers with constant updates, active tumblrs, and a focus on Zuko (primarily in angst and hurt/comfort, with some found family on the side and a dab of very odd scenarios). And while Muffin has a relatively larger following than me and more fics out (for now hehehhehe), I can completely see the similarities.

And, adding onto that, we both have fics with quite a bit of popularity. Muffin’s Salvage is currently the second most-Kudos’d fic in the fandom on Ao3. Out of over 11000. Fractures, too, just reached number 10 in terms of Kudos as of, like, last night.

(which, by the way, is insane, like, omg, we hit 5000 kudos and got #10 all at once i cant breathe)

I admire Muffin as a writer. I think we all do. She’s an incredible writer, and dedicated, and creative, and so many other things.

And that’s probably why I feel so weird every time I get someone who says that they like my work as much as hers, or that they like mine more. I have multiple people say stuff like that in the comments every time I update, I’ve had people message me and say that, I’ve had people put it in asks, and it always messes with my head. 

For a long time, I’ve used writing as a way to let go, to escape from the utter emptiness that life sadly often seems to give. I fix things in stories and I change them around to see what could have happened. And yet, for a long time, I never wrote any fics other than like, little ones that I didn’t care for, or an x Reader (i know ugh) that I was honestly annoyed with before the story could even really start.

I read fics for the same reason, to escape. Muffin’s fics were some of the first I read in the fandom that I actually latched onto, and found myself interested in. Muffin’s overall attitude on Tumblr was so enjoyable. Her stories were original and funny and they helped bring the community back to life. Muffin was the one who inspired me to start writing again, in the way that I wanted. Muffin gave me the inspiration to stop writing for other people and to start writing for myself. All of her stories felt so raw and spoke to me in a way that a fic never really had before. 

I can even remember the specific day when things suddenly became oddly... clear. It was the first of August. It was blisteringly hot and I was camping. I had my old laptop out on top of a towel on the picnic table, hooked up to a hotspot from my phone to get internet, and I was reading Little Zuko v the World. I was at the end of one of the chapters when I felt something just shift.

Google Drive was open in another window, because I had been working on an assignment earlier. I went to it, dived into my fanfic folder, and read through the outline for a story I had sketched out a while back, maybe a month before, as well as the first chapter. I looked back at Ao3, open in the other window, with Muffin’s fic just... shining back at me, and I broke.

Half an hour later, the first chapter of Fractures was published on Ao3.

I started this whole thing as a writer in this fandom (a serious writer in this fandom) with Muffin. If I’m being honest with myself, I never would have published Fractures if I hadn’t read her work. 

So, every time someone compares me to her, it’s weird, because I know that comparison would have never even happened if she hadn’t published her work first, and I can’t help but wonder, every time I read one of those comments, how anyone could ever possibly think I was as good as she is.

That was probably nonsensical, but I think I also needed to get it out of me.

[threadsketchier]

Hey Sketch! Not to be a pest, but any progress on Libero? It’s my absolute favorite fic for Star Wars or maybe just in general, and I know I’m not the only one on pins and needles!

I KNOW, I AM TOO  (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

On paper, so to speak, I shouldn’t really have an excuse - @alderaan-babe helped me out a ton with figuring out space battle logistics and all that less fun crud.  This is becoming more like...

...ok, time for Dirty Laundry Posting™, Debbie Downer ahoy

I’m slowly mentally edging toward a Blue Screen of Death because of two primary things:

I’m kind of a full-time caregiver to my mom, who’s dying a slow, gruesome death at home and

I need to find a job.

**I’m not going to get into the personal details of how I do have money to live off of right now, but suffice to say it’s not a bottomless Scrooge McDuck pit, eventually it’ll run out.

Very very ironically, after leaving my toxic job in Sept. 2019, I planned on taking a little hiatus and then looking for work again in March.  Ha.  Yeah, laugh with me.  We all know what happened then.  So I put that off, especially when it was a struggle bus to obtain food and supplies for like 2 months straight with all the shortages everywhere.  The amazing thing is, despite confining myself to my apartment for the past 7 months, the year’s gone by too fucking fast.  It’s already enough to deal with helping Mom, doing household chores, ordering and then meticulously cleaning all grocery items, in addition to wanting to stay in fandom by hanging out in 2 separate chat servers and being on Tumblr and seeing my favorite YouTube channels...

It’s been too easy to put the looming Work specter aside from all that.  But I can’t avoid it forever, or else we’ll wind up homeless.  I also don’t want to rejoin humanity.  COVID will definitely kill Mom if I brought the germ home, and I don’t want to get it either because I do not have a good track record with illnesses.  I don’t want to play that game of Russian roulette and be one of those outlier statistics of young healthy people who somehow still managed to die from this shit, or wind up in extreme medical debt if I survived (because of course right now I’m uninsured).  I’d really really prefer to find a remote job, especially because I’m already accustomed to it; I had to do plenty of remote work for my last job.

I don’t know what’s going to happen in the next few months.  Every day is going by so quickly.  I’m terrified that I’m not going to find anything and we’re going to be out on the streets.  And if I DO secure a job, I may not have time for fandom anymore, or so little time that I can’t write anymore.  Now, you’d think that would motivate me to hurry up and finish barfing out the story so that it could be done ahead of me needing to stop having a life, wouldn’t it?  But that’s all I can think about when I try to open the draft and keep typing.  I even have another WIP I foolishly started but I’ve stalled on both of them.  It makes me feel the nihilistic sentiment of, “why does this stuff even matter?  It’s pointless, ephemeral fan blather on the interwebz.”  Fic and fandom aren’t going to rescue me when my bank account is empty and I’m hungry and shelterless.

(Sadly, this is the very point my mother tried to make to me all while I grew up, but I was the arrogant, reckless dreamer who just wanted Experiences™ and fun, fuck the consequences.  Well, they’re catching up to me again now.)

Alas, I wish I was a Twitch streamer or a slime-maker on YouTube, raking in the dough, or somebody with a million Patreon supporters, but I’m not “special” enough for that.  I gotta get in line with the rest of the world, as much as I don’t want to.  I just want to write fic and draw again and try podficcing and yell across the internet at a bunch of nerds I’ve gotten to know all day, but I can’t.  I have to face reality and stick my resume on a prettier template and spend the next several weeks desperately combing through job listings, hoping somebody out there is willing to exploit and whip me as a corporate slave again so I can keep paying the bills.

This post feels extremely relevant right now, even though I know all my readers are lovely and patient and aren’t pressuring me.  The thing is, even though we’re technically not obligated to anything because this content is free...we still kind of are.  Because I chose to start posting in the first place.  I started stringing people along by making the story public.  I do kind of owe it to everyone to either finish the story or explain the rest of the plot, at least, because it’s doing readers a disservice to leave the narrative hanging when I first made that unspoken promise by posting it.  I’m never going to learn my lesson that I’m better off not posting content unless it’s complete to avoid causing this kind of disappointment, both to y’all and myself.  Yeah, Darth Real Life happens, but I still feel I’m in the wrong here.

[merakiaes]

A FAIR EXCHANGE: LEAVE A COMMENT & GET NEW CONTENT

IF YOU’RE A FOLLOWER OF MINE WHO FREQUENTLY READS MY CONTENT, OR IF YOU’RE NEW AND PLANNING TO SEND IN A REQUEST, PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO READ THIS ALL THE WAY TO THE END IF YOU WANT TO HELP KEEP THIS BLOG GOING AND IF YOU WANT YOUR REQUEST TO BE WRITTEN. THANK YOU!

(Wordcount: 1417)

From now on things are gonna be a bit different around here; I won’t be writing nor posting any more requests if I don’t get comments on the one-shots I post.

I realize that it might be a bit obsessive and that I must seem desperate for attention but honestly, in my eyes leaving comments on things you read and like should be as obvious as it is to pay someone who, for example, paints you a portrait that you’ve ordered. Especially so if you’re the one who request the fic. 

I’m doing this for free, I’m taking a lot of time out of my life and I’m taking your requests and I’m writing thousand word long one-shots just for you, to make you happy. 

Although I am doing it for myself for the most part as I love to write, it’s incredibly discouraging to barely get any positive feedback; more often than not, not even from the person who requested it, which is probably one of the most disrespectful and ungrateful things there is. 

If you send in a request anonymously, you’ll still remain anonymous if you leave a comment. No one will know that you’re the one who sent the request, so please leave a comment. Some of you may already do this and in that case, I’m extremely grateful, but I know lots of you don’t because some of my requested fics don’t get any comments at all. Absolutely zero. Zilch. Nada. 

That being said, if you want your own request being written from now on, or simply if you want to see new content, do your part and leave a comment on my previous fic belonging to the fandom you want a new fic for. 

You don’t have to pay any more attention than you already have to the fics I’ve already posted up until today, October 5th, but from the moment I post my next fic for a certain fandom, I won’t be posting any more for said fandom until that piece has gotten some interaction. 

To make it a bit clearer, the next request I post for Criminal Minds, will have to get some gratitude and validation in the comment section before I post another request for that fandom. 

The next request I post for Peaky Blinders, will have to get some gratitude and validation in the comment section before I post another request for tha fandom. 

And the same goes for every other fandom I write for, starting with the next fic I post for each of them. Makes sense? If not, then all you need to understand is that I, from now on, won’t write any requests if I don’t get any interaction, and I’ll be putting that little disclaimer at the start of every fic from now on so that it’s clear. 

I know that my blog is to some extent shadowbanned; my fics turn up in the most recent posts in the tags, but they don’t show up in my followers’ news feeds or on their home pages, so I know that this plays a big part in why my blog has become so incredibly dead lately, in comparison to how lively it was at the beginning of this year and also before that. 

But my blog has a total of 4864 followers in this moment, I’ve gained 301 of said followers just this past month, and the gaps between the likes and the comments/reblogs are huge on every single one of my fics, so I know that there are a lot of people who read my content who could take a minute to leave a comment if only they cared enough to do so.

I’m not gonna ask you to reblog, even though it would be greatly appreciated as it would help my content get out there on a larger scale, because I get that some of you want to post other stuff on your blogs that aren’t fanfiction. But please, if you like a fic of mine, leave a comment. It takes no more than a few seconds and a little can go such a long way. 

I feel really dumb and extreme for being this dependent on the validation and I kinda understand if you’re a one-time reader who only likes one of my fics in passing and therefore don’t leave a comment, but I have a LOT of “regulars” who read and like most of the content I put out, including the people on my tag lists, among others. 

So please, if you’re a frequent reader of my fics, if you’re on the tag lists and especially if you’re the one reqeusting it, anon or not, leave a comment the next time I post something you like because I sadly won’t want to keep writing requests if they keep getting this little interaction.  

The comments are, in a way, the payment for me - compensation for my time and hard work, like “regular” workers get paid in money. 

They pay me back the motivation, energy and inspiration that it took from me to write the fic, and it’s just not fun nor worth it for me if I don’t get shown any gratitude for the fics I write, which is why I haven’t posted in a while again. 

An artist can’t keep painting, no matter how much they love it, if they don’t get paid for the work they do for others. Because with what money are they going to purchase new material and resources, if they don’t get any?

Just like that, I can’t keep writing requests, no matter how much I love writing, if I don’t get validated and hyped up. Because what is the point of creating stuff for other people if they don’t even show that they appreciate or like it? 

Hopefully you get my point, and if you follow me for other reasons than for reading my one-shots, or if you only followed me for a fandom that I no longer write for, don’t mind this post. This is meant for the people who still frequently read and like my content, who are on my tag lists, and who send in requests of their own. 

To those of you who make it a habit to reblog and/or comment without having to be asked to do so: there aren’t enough words in the world to describe how much I love and appreciate you, a single comment saying “I really liked this” can make my entire day and give me the biggest rush of motivation and inspiration to write more. 

I know a lot of writers here on Tumblr feel like I do, so please, as a reader, make it a habit to leave comments because even if a writing account is quiet about it, not getting any interaction is discouraging and it kills the spark. 

So to wrap it all up, to me, this seems like a more than fair exchange: 

Comments on my fics - I’ll be motivated, inspired and hyped up, the spark will remain and I will keep writing and posting requests and ENJOY doing so, and you will keep getting fresh content and getting your personal requests written. A win-win situation for all of us. 

No comments on my fics - My motivation and inspiration will be pretty much non-existent, this blog will die out, you won’t get any more fics, and as I have decided with a 110% certainty not to post if I don’t get interaction on my fics, I won’t have to keep forcing myself to write when it becomes more of a burden than a fun thing to do anymore.

Hopefully you will help me keep this blog alive, as it is one of the things I hold dearest in life and one of my biggest accomplishments. I love to write and there’s nothing I’d rather spend my days doing, but not getting any comments and/or reblogs leaves me running on an empty tank and it takes a lot out of me to force myself to write when that happens, which I hope you will understand and help me avoid. 

Thank you for reading all the way down, and thank you even further if you’re going to start leaving comments. Hopefully, we can all build this blog back up together because if it comes to life again, I’m planning to re-open requests for a lot of abandoned and closed, and also entirely new, fandoms and characters, so from a former reader’s perspective, you can really only win on this situation. 

[garyrennell]

I’M TAKING A BREAK.

hello, guys. some of you might’ve noticed that i’ve not been active in this site as much as i was before, with this being caused by the pandemic since almost my entire time and energy has been directed to my healthcare career and working in hospitals. ever since then, i’ve been torn between having so so many projects and not having time to finish them. i’ve put lots of effort into trying to post at least once a week and to try to participate in the community, but time has always been an issue, so don’t think i was ignoring you guys or anything like that🥺 still, this isn’t the exact reason why i’m posting this, this intro is just to give you guys some context, with it being basically me just not being here, as i always say.

so, days ago i got a message from my home country, in which i won’t get into details but it informed me about the passing away of a friend of mine. needless to say, it has affected me massively in all aspects, and my blogs are no exception. the main thing is that i started this tumblr journey with her back in 2012; we created our main blogs together, we learned how to edit together and all that tumblr stuff. i’ve always associated this site with her ofc and since she’s been gone, i haven’t even been able to log in without thinking about her, less edit or put on a new post. it may sound weird, but even whenever i see my dashboard i get a sense of emptiness. i’m afraid that maybe i’ll never be able to be here without getting sad and just being reminded that she’s no longer with me. so, this summed to my time issue has made me take the decision to turn my semi-hiatus into a permanent hiatus, for as long as it takes me to heal from this. i’ll keep all of my blogs intact nonetheless, for when i come back. besides, i will still be updating both of my fics because they’re a major part of my happiness right now and take my mind out of bad things.

so yeah, i don’t want to wrap this up with me being all sad and wanting you to pity me, because that’s not what i want at all. this is basically me just letting you guys know why i’ll be gone because i don’t want you to think that i don’t want to hang out anymore, that i’m not seeing posts on purpose or that i’m not supporting you anymore, no way.

i’m finishing this up on a lighter note, by ofc thanking all of my pals in here, all of the beautiful people i’ve met and to all of the people who have supported this blog💕 i’m so so sad to be leaving just when the fandom is coming to life and we’re getting more content, new creators and characters, and everything is just amazing. there’s so many projects i wanted to finish, with my most recent one wanting to make edits of all of you guys’ MCs just like i did at the beginning of this year, but sadly i won’t be able to, or at least not in a while. anyway, i think that my mission has been almost accomplished, with it being to help a bit on having some of you thirsting those gorgeous pixel men and women for months haha💕

i’ll also leave a few links here of leukemia charities, so maybe you can consider to donate, because your money could be so helpful in keeping people like my friend Dani a little longer in this world. so yeah, goodbye for now and i wish you all the best of luck in this fandom✨✨

Leukemia Net: [here]

Donate to LLS: [here]

Donate to Leukemia UK: [here]

[fogsrollingin]

Title: under the table and dreaming, ch 2/2 Author: fogsrollingin Fandom: Supernatural Story details: Sam & Dean, rated PG-13, 3.3k words total. Story status: complete.  Summary:  Ghouls think Sam Winchester's a tasty cinnamon roll too. Next entry for @whumptober2020! Prompts filled is a bit of two #20 prompts, "Lost" and "Field Medicine." Tumblr link to Chapter 1 || AO3 ||

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ under the table and dreaming ch 2｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Sadly, Sam wasn’t asleep for long. He cracked his eyes open at the road, Dean beside him. It was just a normal town at night, streets wet and reflecting the traffic lights’ glare. Everything was fine except for how Sam’s heart was pounding inside his chest. At first it was surreal, Sam just experiencing this sensation, his heart wildly glitching inside him. Then his breathing got shallow, his whole body broke into a sweat, and Sam flailed, slapped Dean’s arm to get his attention.

“Holy shit, Sam? Sammy? What the-”

Sam clutched his chest and gasped, eyes wide and terrified as Dean pulled into a random strip mall parking lot.

“Sam!” Dean shouted as he turned, hands all over Sam trying to get a gauge on what was happening.

“S’my… heart,” Sam gasped.

“What the hell,” Dean murmured almost to himself as he ducked down, pulled Sam’s hands away and pressed an ear to his brother’s chest. The beat was erratic, weak. “Okay, down, lie down Sammy,” Dean ordered, helping Sam recline along the bench seat. “You gotta relax. It’s gonna be okay. Did they dose you with anything?”

Sam’s eyes were tearing again and he shook his head. “Don’t… know,” he panted.

“Okay, that’s okay,” Dean rubbed Sam’s chest over his heart like he could get an easy rhythm going. Sam was twitching and trembling, all color that’d returned to him earlier disappearing again. Dean swore under his breath, panicked, and looked out past the windshield at the small stores he’d parked in front of. “Sammy,” he leaned over and tapped a palm against Sam’s cheek to get him to look into his eyes. “I’ll be right back.”

Without getting Sam’s approval, he pulled back and launched out of the car from the driver’s seat and sprinted into a small tobacconist shop. The brass bell clanged on the glass door overhead and the cashier, an older portly gentleman, jumped out of his skin. “Have you got a defibrillator in here?” Dean demanded, hoping they did because they’d considered how their clientele were high risk.

Still shocked the gentleman just nodded and pointed. Dean followed the direction to a small defibrillator mounted on the wall next to an employees only door. He ripped it off and nearly broke the glass of the door on its stupid brass bell as he left the store with it in his arms.

He ran back up to the driver’s door of the Impala that he’d left open. Sam was still wheezing. He’d turned on his side and pulled his knees up, his hands covering his chest. A bright sheen of sweat on his face highlighted agonized features. Dean was trying to figure out how to do this with the space they had though and coming up empty. He needed Sam lying down but he couldn’t get in there and apply the AED pads without sitting him up.

“Sammy, I’m so sorry but we gotta move,” he decided as he said it. He rushed to the passenger side of the car and opened the door. He swore as he realized the parking lot ground was wet; he’d have to get Sam up to the sidewalk that connected the strip mall entrances where their overhangs had protected the cement from rainwater.

Sam gagged as Dean hauled him up and made him stumble to sidewalk. Once there, he let his brother collapse to his knees, then guided him down to the ground.

The tobacconist rushed out. “You want me to call 9-1-1?”

Dean opened the AED. There were a couple beeps and a woman’s even automated voice said, “Call for help now.”

“Yeah, go ahead,” Dean replied, resigned. Sam grabbed his hand and Dean leaned forward. “It’s okay, Sam,” he lied. He pushed Sam’s hair back.

“Remove all clothing from patient’s chest,” the AED instructed. Sam fumbled with the buttons of his shirt.

“Pull red handle to open bag.” Dean ripped it open and found small clothing scissors.

“I got it, I got it, Sammy,” Dean muttered, drawing Sam’s hands away so he could unbutton the last ones and then cut through Sam’s white undershirt. Sam pulled fisted hands up against his shoulders and shivered as Dean pulled the shirt away. “I know it’s cold. It’s okay, we got this,” he coached as he glanced at the pictures on the pads before peeling one off its blue plastic and applying it ‘exactly as shown in the picture’ just as the AED directed. He got the other one on too.

“Sammy?”

“Here,” Sam gasped.

“Good boy,” Dean praised, carding a hand through Sam’s hair. Sam pressed his lips together, eyes tight with strain but relying on Dean. The AED announced, “Evaluating heart rhythm.” Dean lifted away but hovered his hands over Sam, knowing he couldn’t touch during this part. Sam’s hitching, shallow breaths were loud as they waited, eyes still fixed on Dean.

“It’s okay. I’m right here.” Sam’s eyes fell to half-mast, mouth fell open to gulp air.

“Standby. Preparing to shock.”

Sam’s eyes closed then, all conscious tension sifting out of him. His arms fell limp to his sides.

“Sam!”

“Everyone clear. Do not touch patient.” Dean gritted his teeth, helpless. “Delivering shock.” The AED beeped loudly several times in warning before a muted thunk sound and Sam’s chest quivered under the pads. “Shock delivered. Provide chest compressions and rescue breaths.”

Dean ignored the last order and instead pressed his ear against Sam’s chest. It still wasn’t strong but the rhythm was good. “Sam? Sammy?” Dean prompted, gently slapping his brother’s face. “C’mon, wake up.”

Finally, Sam’s eyelids fluttered.

“Yes! Yeah Sam, come on, not gonna lose you.” Dean brushed Sam’s hair, thumbed tears off Sam’s cheeks. “Come on.”

“Hey,” Sam rasped. His eyes rolled back and Dean jerked him calling his name. Sam gasped and opened his eyes back up wide this time. “Okay. Here,” he huffed.

“Evaluating heart rhythm,” the AED suddenly announced. “No shock advised. Stop CPR.”

“What the fuck was that,” Dean muttered angrily, now that he could afford anger. He peeled the pads off Sam’s chest. Sam hunched over into Dean, reached around Dean’s back to hold himself up. Dean got his arm around Sam’s waist and together they got him up and stumbling back into the car.

Sirens wailed, lights flashed, an ambulance pulling into the parking lot and Dean hit the gas, speeding their way out, the defibrillator’s detritus left on the sidewalk in front of the tobacconist’s place.

“That’s not when you should really be using an AED, y’know,” Sam said coarsely, worn out beyond belief now.

“Well it was either that or a shot of adrenaline.”

“That would’ve killed me,” Sam pitched and Dean suppressed a laugh.

“Well I guess they had a defibrillator instead then.” Dean shrugged. His eyes glinted and Sam realized he was pulling his leg. “Whatever they did, we’ll keep an eye on it. If you have any issues with your heart again Sammy, we’re going to the hospital, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Sam agreed readily. Dean bit his lip, not liking how willing they both were about this as they both despised hospitals but… that had really freaked them both out just now.

They stopped off at a bodega to get orange juice and nuts and some Halloween-themed Oreos to make Sam laugh.

They checked into a slightly more up-scale motel than their usual, again because they were both a little unsettled and Dean wanted to bed down first chance they got.

The first aid on Sam’s arms was daunting with Dean justifiably nauseous at the sight of Sam’s skinned flesh. Most of it would scar ripples and maybe keloids. Sam didn’t care though. Dean insisted that chicks dug scars and got Sam to smile.

Once that was done, Dean left to get dinner. Sam, on orders to relax but not move or strain his heart, decided on a slow easy walk into the bathroom for a warm bath. The tub was clean porcelain, big and deep and felicitously proportionate to Sam’s body. They didn’t get these in the low-priced motels where they normally lodged. Sam was going to take full advantage and appreciate it.

He was careful to keep his newly bandaged arms away from the water. He leaned his back against the tub and heaved a deep breath of relief, inhaling the soft steam wafting from the surface, letting the heat penetrate his muscles. The soak was bliss.

Half an hour later Dean came in carrying Panera and, concerned when Sam didn’t respond to him when he announced he was home, found Sam fast asleep in the tub.

Tempted, Dean’s better judgment prevailed. He backed out of the bathroom and rapped his knuckles lightly against the door until he heard startled splashing. He chuckled. “Sammy?”

“Uh, yeah, hey.”

“I got a broccoli cheddar soup and a Mediterranean veggie sandwich waiting for you out here.”

“Oh wow okay. Thank you, I’ll be right out.” Sam’s voice was bleary but delighted. Dean grinned as he turned back to the bed. He'd never stop getting a little thrill out of making Sam sound so happy like that, especially so soon after what he’d been through.

Sam was groggy but pulled himself out of the bath easily, dried himself off, and found himself actually excited for the considerate meal Dean had gotten him, as he doubted he’d be able to stomach anything with meat. He came out in a towel and smiled at Dean who’d already started chowing down on his own sandwich. Sam threw on a soft, thick cotton long-sleeved shirt and the appetizing smells got to him. He stopped looking for sweatpants, instead opting to just wear his towel for awhile longer and moved over to sit next to Dean on his bed where he’d spread the food out. Dean pointed at the cartons for him and Sam snatched them up, reiterating a sincere thank you. 

Dean nodded, accepting Sam's gratitude. “No problems while I was gone?” Dean garbled, mouth full. He was trying for casual but his eyes were intent, the shadow of worry not far behind.

“Everything’s been good. No heart palpitations, no symptoms of infection,” Sam lifted his arms to show the untouched bandages.

Dean swallowed. “That’s awesome,” he replied, low-key and so genuine that Sam grinned, eyes shining.

Dean turned and grabbed the TV remote off the nightstand, angled so his legs could spread out towards the foot of the bed. Sam settled next to his brother similarly, prepared to watch whatever Dean chose unless something really caught his eye. He wasn’t sure when this had become pure contentment for him, but here he was.

Fin

A/N: I must disclaim that I'm so down to the wire on completing Whumptober that I barely did any medical research here. All I can say is that I was trained as an emergency responder in Kenya like ten years ago where everybody was like "if you have a defibrillator, that thing's gold. Always break that bad boy out if you got it and just follow its instructions." I watched an AED's youtube video to get the prompt language right, checked to make sure an AED could sometimes shock a conscious person, and then I just took off from there, lol. 

Maybe one day I'll stealth edit this to give a researched explanation as to how/why Sam would randomly fall into either ventricular fibrillation and ventricular tachycardia (the only shockable heart rhythms for AEDs) after being concussed, anemic, possibly drugged, and having his arm flesh stripped and eaten... or maybe all those things are so compromising they can jumpstart some these arrhythmias? Maybe Sam had a pre-existing condition I didn't mention. I have no idea. Let's say yes to anything/everything that makes this a lil more plausible. 😅😅😅

Okay now back to your normally confident author: Thank you so much for reading! Please like, comment, reblog whatever you’re inclined to do if you liked it and you've got the time. 💛🤗 ~ Alex