#sacha baron cohen headcanons

[bound-up-feelings]

hi! i love your work sm :) can you do one with sacha being really jealous of how close his s/o is with their male co-star and they end up having a nasty fight and he makes up for it later. like really angsty and smutty!! ;))

Well of course he's jealous

Your co-star is just getting really close and a little too friendly and, in his eyes, you're not doing much to stop them from doing anything

Of course, without him noticing you're telling them that you are not interested and that you are taken anyway

Now he does end up lashing out and making a complete ass of himself and ends up pissing you off as well

You even went as far as going to a friend to just cool off, they understood why and let you stay as long as you needed

The next day he goes to your friends house and asks to talk to you

When you eventually come out, he is immediately apologizing 

He even starts to get pissed again, but at himself this time

Eventually you end up forgiving hIM and you both go home

When you get there, the house is spotless, and he even cooked dinner in hopes his apology would bring you home

Of course, this is better than anything you could've expected 

He is attending to your needs all night long 

He is such a gentleman that he even goes as far as carrying you to bed and getting a bath ready for you

After the bath though things start to get heated

He's kissing you and caressing your body in all the right ways

Not even missing a spot on your body

His eyes piercing yours as he kisses down your body and begins to worship you in all the best ways

Let's just say that the night was dedicated to you and he made a promise to make you feel loved and cared for and he fulfilled that promise ten hold

(Hello! I am so sorry. This request has been in my inbox for a hot minute and I am just now get it out, please forgive me lol. i hope you enjoyed it!)

[lemurblog]

Jeff Bennett's Julien impression sounds uncannily like Sacha Baron Cohen's Julien so now I have a crack headcanon that movie!Julien is actually Magic Steve

That would explain the subtle differences between movie!Julien and show!Julien. of course it doesn't explain the differences between movie!Julien and Magic Steve.......

[ironmansuuucks]

this is utter garbage btw and the first thing I’ve ever written for sacha baron cohen lmao and I feel I need to adapt my writing style to suit him better but for a first try it’s okay I suppose hahah

hmu with some ideas about this man plz I need the inspo

sbc headcanon:

- he is 100% that boyf that makes u coffee/tea every morning

- and if he has time, sits on the end of the bed with you while you drink it before he heads to work

- or if he leaves before u get up, he has ur cup sitting out waiting, ready for you just to pour the water in

- slow mornings on the couch on sundays, you lying on his stomach listening to him chat about how he’d fix the world

- “enough of that.. fancy a cuppa?” As he would bring his face down to kiss u on the nose. “You read my mind”, “yeah well u keep out of mine.. u don’t wanna know what goes on up there” he’d tease, a quick wink

- that damn hair. It would be the death of you one day

- from the soft, dark curls when he had styled it, to the morning messy bed head

- constantly fighting the urge to run your hands through it

- being on the red carpet and just gushing every time you looked up at how handsome he was, just wanting to run ur fingers through those curls

- and oh, did he know how u felt about them

- “I’ll allow u to run ur hands through my hair if you let me tug at yours later tonight” he’d whisper in your ear, sending shivers down your back, trying hard not to blush

[eldunea]

human lotor would trick a guy like this

[mithrilbeard]

im bored so recast list based on my headcanons

tadanobu asano as thorin

salman khan as frodo

kareena kapoor as rosie cotton

asrani as bilbo (both young and old)

ayushmann khurrana as merry

imran khan as pippin

suraj sharma as sam

john cho as legolas

sandra oh as galadriel

jamie chung as arwen

tim kang as thranduil

daniel dae kim as elrond

will yun lee as haldir

sacha baron cohen as boromir

adrien brody as aragorn

zach braff as faramir

jason isaacs as bard

natalie portman as éowyn

chris pine as éomer

shun oguri as gimli

[bound-up-feelings]

Sacha Baron Cohen

Sacha Baron Cohen: Absolutely Infatuated

Sacha Baron Cohen: Lazy Day

Sacha Baron Cohen: In charecter

Sacha Baron Cohen: Locked Doors

Sacha Baron Cohen: To Make You Laugh

Sacha Baron Cohen: Dancing on the edge

Sacha Baron Cohen: Surprise!

Sacha Baron Cohen: He Gets Hurt

Sacha Baron Cohen: NSFW Headcanons

Sacha Baron Cohen: Taking care of him when he’s drunk

Sacha Baron Cohen: Him being complete opposites of his s/o

Sacha Baron Cohen: Stargazing

Sacha Baron Cohen: Him being jealous of your co-star NSFW Hc’s

[bound-up-feelings]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a Sacha x Fem!Reader that is very well known for her classical music and poetry -she's apart of the more scholarly side of the entertainment industry - whilst her boyfriend is known for the exact opposite. :) Their differences strangely makes the relationship way more interesting, to be with someone so unlike you. Btw I'm aware that Sacha is extremely academic off stage but most of the general public aren't aware :) Love your writing, Z

You both somehow compliment each other very well

Despite the fact that his movies and such are more comedic and humorous and your job is not like that

He enjoys your music a lot, he talks about it to everyone and suggests it to every person he sees

He can always count on you coming to him when you are working on another piece, whether it be music or poetry

No matter how you think about it, he always says it's beautiful and couldn't be more perfect

Anytime you have some type of interview or review, you always mention how much you love Sacha and how much he always had your back through the whole thing

And it never seems to end when someone gets shocked at the fact that you and Sacha, the same guy who played Borat, are together

Two different people, yet you compliment each other like no other

Somehow, it always makes you both laugh at how people can't believe that you, too, are together

But all of the awards shows and things he attends he always has you there by his side

And it is usually the same for you, except some people have the audacity to say that he shouldn't come because of his movie status and the things he's known for

And his fans and stuff are kind of the same except theirs is more directed towards the fact that you don't seem like you are going the same speed as sacha

Sacha is this crazy and hilarious guy, and you are a slow paced, musician, and poet, doesn't necessarily fit, but you both fit each other perfectly

[bound-up-feelings]

stargazing w sacha i love ur work SMMM thank uuuu <333

It was actually something you guys had been talking about doing for a while

He's been camping before, but stargazing wasn't the purpose of that trip

Yet here he is with you on the road to a spot that you both had heard of

Both are super excited and happy to be together

When you get to the spot, it is beautiful

It's by a lake, and so you both decide to make camp by the water

Long into your stay, night comes fast, and you both find yourselves on one of the sleeping bags staring up through the trees

Of course, this is a moment you both would never forget, so many nights before had you looked up at the sky only to see the city lights and building blinding you instead

This time, though, it's a pleasant moment between you both

You're holding each other's hands, and on occasion, you can feel sacha rub your knuckles with his thump

At one point, you find yourself looking at him rather than the stars above, and he notices

So you both decide to look at each other

And in this moment, nothing could possibly ruin this

The calm peace that is surrounding you both makes this moment all the more wonderful at you, staring into each other's eyes

Sacha brings his palm to the side of your face and strokes your cheek

Not a word is spoken as this happens, but you both know that your actions speak louder than any words ever could

This was your happy place and a place you'd never forget

[bound-up-feelings]

hey, lovely! been browsing your page for sometime now and just wanted to say i live for the fics! i would like to request headcanons for Time (Alice Throught the Looking Glass) x Reader where Reader is like Mother Nature (get it? mother nature and father time) and just general stuff (dating, pining, pass times, etc.) and other things like Time helping them through spring equinox and maybe even shenanigans on daylight savings time - please and thank you!

He had been wanting to go on a date with for some time but never could make the time (no pun intented)

He honestly had none. He was always so busy and trying to make sure everything happened when it needed to

But his luck would have it that you weren't as occupied as he seemed to be, and you actually approached him

You didn't ask him on a date, but you did schedule another "coincidence" with him

That's how he saw it. Somehow, when he wanted to see you most, you would just show up out of the blue

He loved it and loved how in tune you were with everything around you

Every being, creature, and nature itself knew you

It all greeted you with a passion and a love that he just adored

When you actually was able to get him out of that dark and sad looking castle, you brought him along with you to see some of your moments in the day

He had no idea that your "job" was such a beauty in itself, and the moment he saw you bring a new life into the world, he's realized how much he really had fallen for you

He loves everything about you, and that actually led him to confessing his infatuation with you

You found it amazing and extremely excited that your feeling and his were mutual

Now dating happens as often as you make it

He takes you places, has given you tours of the entire castle, which took almost a whole week just showing you all the rooms and the purpose of each one

And he isn't too familiar with the outside world, so any outings you both go on, it's mainly to places you know

But he will do everything in his power to make you laugh, smile, giggle, and laugh

He loves watching you laugh and loves how your eyes crinkle at the sides when you smile and loves your laugh

The sound makes his cheeks blush and the cogs in his neck turn extra quickly

And you love that about him, how anytime you say something or do something that expresses how much you love him those cogs will start turning so fast that you're sure he might explode

You also love how blue and vibrant his eyes are

Often, he has actually had to snap you out of your gaze because you've actually gotten lost in his eyes

When you're not getting lost in his eyes and he's not blushing like a maniac, you both love spending time with each other

Most of the time, it's just sitting together talking

He loves talking to you and could listen to you talk about your day all day and would never get tired of hearing your voice

He also has found that you love the helpers (Seconds)

You love those little guys a ton and could spend your whole day just talking to them and laughing at their little shenanigans

And they love you, which is a really good thing

Especially since after everything with Alice, he has a whole new respect for his Seconds and values their opinion on everything

So, them liking you means that you are officially part of his little family

And he hopes that you can say the same about him and his

(Hello. I know it hasn't been a long time by no means but it's too long to not do a request so here I am. I hope you like this. I did like the idea of mother nature and father time. it made a lot of sense, and I loved it.)

[bound-up-feelings]

Hello dear,I’m in love with time,yeah the movie came out in 2016 (attlg) so what lol I LOVE how funny he is,but like there’s barely anything with him,even with Sacha,so if u could maybe write something about him,like reader got invited by alice but when reader went inside alice house they saw a mirror in maybe the bedroom and Alice nowhere in sight so they got in because they are curious and got teleported in under land,and as they walked they saw time castle and idk they got friends or even better enemies to lovers,anyway this is very long sorry,have a good day :D (reader can be a she or a they !)

Well first off, he thinks your exactly like Alice to all trust or any form of it is out of the window so say goodbye to that

Don't expect him to even be remotely nice to you from the moment he meets you

Ever since Alice came along all she has done is waste him and he despises her for that

It's the same with you

Even though you tried to reason with her that she's hurting the one thing that keeps this world turning she doesn't even listen to you

You agree with her all the way, but she's harming others to do so

Anytime you saw each other he'd get so pissed and frustrated at you

Yelling and trying to catch up before you and Alice could make yet another escape

Of course, he was always just so close but never exactly fast enough

And of course, in the end she realizes the truth, and everyone is happy when she finally returns what's been taken

After she's apologized you actually apologized as well

When time heard Alices apology he accepted it with a curt nod and a few wise words to warn her of future attempts to not listen to wiser beings

When hears you apologize, he is also apologizing for some odd reason

He cannot maintain eye contact with you for more than two seconds

The gears in the back of his neck are turning to hard he fears they may burst

He tries to calm himself by telling himself that what he feels is useless because you will be leaving for forever

Of course, you make a promise to come back the moment you have the chance

He nods his head in hope but also, he has a feeling that that promise may never be fulfilled

About a week later you actually came back

When you entered the castle, the seconds were super ecstatic to see you

They led you to Time and sure enough he was bent over working on something when he heard the seconds making commotion

"Will you be silent. I am trying to fix what you have broken and i cannot do so with all the chatter."

He says standing tall and turning to look in your direction

When he makes eye contact with you, he wastes none of himself to immediately cross the room and envelop you in a bone crushing hug

He sighs out as buries his head in your shoulder

"My dear, I was beginning you had forgotten your promise." 

Of course, he takes your hand in his and begins to lead you around just talking about anything and everything

At one point you stop and begin talk about random things

"You know I thought you didn't want to ever see me again. Since I was with Alice and all." 

He scoffs

"My dear. I have loved you since the moment I laid my eyes on you. Though it did frustrate me that you helped your friend conspire against me. I couldn't help but fall even deeper in love with you."

Those words shocked you, but you couldn't help but immediately hug him

"I couldn't agree more with you. I too fell for you too." 

And like that you found yourself going to him more and more often till you finally just said screw it and almost ended up staying there

Every now and then, instead of just visiting time like usual you were visiting your friends and family instead and found yourself staying with Time

So, you could definitely say that life was beginning to become a dream come true

(So sorry for such the long wait. Thing have been crazy. I have a better explanation on my pinned post, so please go check that out so your and everyone else is up to date.)

[bound-up-feelings]

Time

Time: First Meeting

Time: Confessing his love

Time: Good News

Time: Turning him on

Time: S/o who is like mother nature

Time: Enemies to Lovers Hc’s

[bound-up-feelings]

watching a horror movie with jean / ali g / bruno HAHHAAHA idk which character would make for a funnier or better fic hehehehe so u can decideeee ^^

Jean:

He actually is not that scared of horror films

He does get grossed out by all the gory stuff but paranormal and demon based movies, loves it

But lord, don't let him watch Hellraiser or The Thing. He will literally leave the building, no, not the room that's still to close for comfort

Does like the moves The conjuring, Insidious, Sinister, mainly movies that have some type of demon shit going on

Will go the whole nine yards and get popcorn, chocolate, soda, and anything and everything for a horror movie marathon

Go big or go home baby, he's all in

Ali-g:

He's not much into horror films but watches them anyway cause he loves you

But the best part is he doesn't do jumpscares

He cannot do them, he jokes through the whole movie and makes jokes but the second he's not paying attention somehow the movie knows and will fuck him up

Also, he doesn't like the movie Saw

Can't do the whole torture and broken bones stuff

Mainly, the broken bone stuff he hates that

Makes him nauseous as hell and would most likely leave the room to go straight to the bathroom

His favorite movie is scream

Simple easy and he's not one for the big jumpscares and knows that it doesn't have very many, and he can handle it

He does finger guns at the screen and will say how Sydney should have had a gun on her and will shake his head like he's disappointed that a high-school 17-18 year old doesn't have a hand gun

Don't let him around your nieces or nephews he's a great guy but a horrible influence

Bruno:

Nope

He doesn't do them at all

Will hide his face on your shoulder and cover his face with his hands/blanket

He'll let you put the movie in but will get three seconds into a scary part, and he will be covered up and doing something else entirely

But I swear if you have him watch a movie where there is a bittersweet happy ending like in Come Play, he will cry

He doesn't like to cry but will cry

That's his favorite movie out of all of them. Despite the scary parts and stuff that had him hiding through almost the whole movie, his favorite is the ending

The whole way through, he will hold your hand and lean his head onto you, and its sweet

Until you put in a really scary movie and he is back to square one

You love it, though

You really shouldn't torture him like this, but he knows you think it's funny, and so he'll keep doing it, but he'll never tell you that

[bound-up-feelings]

Bruno

Bruno: With a Transmasculine s/o

Bruno: Watching a horror movie

[bound-up-feelings]

maybe alota sacha smut headcanons plz ? 👀

Warnings: Hell, Sacha is a warning on his own, Mentions of sex, 

Well first off Sacha is a great lover

He’s very attentive when he should be and when he needs to be

He’s actually a really generous lover and loves to just lay all his love on you

His favorite thing to do with you and as normal as it sounds, he just loves to fuck you

To him it’s not about a good fuck or anything it’s about finding out new things about your body

He has committed everything about you to memory

Especially what makes you tick; he loves to tease you in public, but it’s nothing obvious which makes it both better and worse

Because what he will do will be very subtle and no one will see him doing it

So, when he knows you see him doing whatever that may be and sees how flushed or embarrassed you get, he will make his way over to you and will hang by for the rest of the night whispering the dirtiest things he can think of

And when you think he’s going to take mercy on you he only amps it up

When you’re both sat down at a table or anything he will run his hand on the inside of your thighs and very gently brush against your crotch

Of course, he knows your reaction and will already have a sly comment to make or excuse as to why you reacted in such a way

The way home it was worse

All he does in there is grope you and say dirty shit

And of course, he knows the mess he reduces you to after the fact

He’s a sly bastard and will make you beg for him but to your defense, you do try to keep it down

When you’re inside your home he already has you against the wall, he’s bruising up your neck with all the hickies and shit

Your underwear was already off by the time you got home, they’re in the car still

When you get to the bedroom, he’s got you out of all your clothes and he’s out of his

I would like to believe he’s more of a fast and rough kind of guy, but he likes to extend the wait to cum for far too long

He loves reducing you to a puddle

And if it means he’ll hear your pretty whimpers and moans and his name rolling off your tongue, he’d just about do anything to hear it

Hell, he’d drop everything he’s doing and get in your position if it meant hearing your like that

I also want to add that I feel like he’s mainly a dominant person, but let me tell you if it pleases you greatly to be dominant then he’ll trade places and let you do as you please

[bound-up-feelings]

hi! i'm new to fanfics and i read sumn like this in another person's fic. do you think you could write about sacha getting really really badly severely hurt by someone while making his movies and you rush to the hospital for him? taking care of him too. no pressure!! and thank you btw!! i love your work sm

To be completely honest, you were almost certain that this was another joke or prank by Sacha.

But when you realized it wasn't it was like a car crash hit you.

You were shocked.

You had never got a call like this before.

You were quick, you grabbed your wallet and keys and ran to the car.

You practically sped to the hospital.

When you arrived, you ran in, but it was like a tidal wave of emotion crashed on you.

This could be a horrible moment where a nurse is gonna tell you that the one person you've supported and loved has died.

All the worse possibilities kept swirling in your mind over and over again.

When you reached the check in desk the woman looked at you, smiling and her face fell when she saw how distraught you were. "Can I help you?"

"Y-yes. I'm here to see my husband. His name is Sacha Baron Cohen." You say through slight sniffles.

"I see. He is currently in room 310. Its right down that hall right there."

She says pointing to a hall right across from her.

Walking down that hall was the worse walk you've ever had.

The whole time was like it was slow motion.

You felt your heart beating in your throat.

The thought of seeing him with IVs and tubes all in him scared you half to death.

When you got to his door you just looked at it.

No idea of what to do and the first thing you thought was maybe this was a dream.

Some crazy dream you conjured up but no, this was real, and you were really looking at room 310.

Pushing open that door felt like a scene in a horror movie, you expected someone to jump out and scare you. But instead, you saw white walls, white floor, crisp white bed sheets and finally you saw Sacha.

He was awake.

He was looking at you and was smiling.

At seeing his smiling face, you broke down.

You cried at seeing him and you almost ran to him. So happy that he was ok.

But when you went to hug him, he hissed out in pain, and you immediately retracted. He waved his hand "Your fine love." "I'm fine? What about you! You're in the hospital and your worried about me? How did this even happen Sacha?"

You were sobbing at this point.

Unable to really comprehend what happened to him.

He then explained to you that a fight scene he was in that included him moving out of the way of a table being pushed at him.

He had prepared for this scene many times, but he was unlucky when the table was kicked at him, and he wasn't paying attention.

Ending with the table hitting him right in the ribs and resulting in broken, and bruised ribs.

You wanted so bad to tell Sacha he was an idiot for not paying attention but then again you really wanted to find the guy who kicked the table.

You wanted to ruin his whole damn day.

You wanted to fuck him up.

But that whole idea was completely ruined when Sacha practically read your mind.

"Don't even think about it. I would let you do anything, even though I'm in pain. Plus, I need you here to help keep me company, you'll do that for me right?" You shook your head and reluctantly sat down in the chair next to his bed. He smiled from ear to ear and held your hand.

And you stayed there all day and night.

You didn't want to leave his side not even for a moment but of course the need to pee became overbearing and had to be done.

It was only a day in the hospital before he was able to be checked out.

He needed to be completely in the clear before he could get back to the set.

Of course, he kept trying to tell you he was fine when every now and then when he'd breath in deep he would wince in pain.

So of course, treating him like a toddler was appropriate.

He loves it though he loves the attention and loves how you handle him with extreme care.

[bound-up-feelings]

HI may i request a fluffy sbc fic where sacha celebrates and parties w friends and for some reason u couldn't be there but during the party he gets batshit DRUNK and trashed so u have to get him and take him home

jus some super cute silly goofy clingy adorable sasher WHJSHAJSHAJAHHAHAH

When it came to Sacha's friends, he was always there for them. Especially when one of them was getting married. Except, how exactly was he supposed to celebrate and have this memory, if he couldn't even remember the event of the night? Well, that's where you come in. You knew this was a celebration, in which would be fused with loads of alcohol. It didn't bother you one bit; in fact, it made your happy that he was having fun. So, when you got the call from one of the guys, letting you know that Sacha needed a babysitter and was getting very wobbly and incoherent. He also added that he was asking for you. Which didn't surprise you, he always talked about you to everyone.

So, you get up and dressed and out the door you were. The drive wasn't far at all. When you arrived, he was outside with the friend that had called you. Stepping out of the car you walked towards them. "Hey y/n. I'm sorry to call you so late, he was just getting too into it, and he was asking for you like every other second." You wave him off and shake your head. "Don't worry about it. I'm glad you called me. Come on Sacha, time to go home." You say wrapping your arm around his waist. He lied his head on your shoulder and thankfully started walking with you. You opened the car door and helped him inside. He just looks at you for a moment before smiling wide like an idiot and leaning back into the seat. You looked back at his friend and said a thank you before walking to the driver's seat.

The drive itself was relatively quiet. He barley even moved or made a sound the whole time. That was until you got home and inside. He had already made his way over to the Bluetooth speakers and somehow connected his phone. Music starting to play, quietly but loud even to make out the sound. It was Staying Alive. He looks back over to you and starts to do the classic dance moves which look absolutely awful with all the alcohol in his system making him wobble. Seeing him wobble, a bit too much you walk over and grab ahold of him, originally just wanting to help him stay upright. Instead, he grabs ahold of your waist and starts to move you along with him. This was like all the times you saw the drunk people at the bar or club dancing like crazy people. Now you and Sacha were the drunk and crazy people. He starts to laugh to himself and soon it starts to get very uncontrollable. He tries to tell you something but instead he gives up and continues to just laugh and hold on to you.

This went on for a good 10 minutes until he just stops. At first it scared you but then he just looked at you. Leaned forward, initially going for your lips he ends up kissing the space between your top lip and nose. He breathes out and pulls your closer and just holds you. No more laughing, no talking, just the music being shuffled in the background. It was a moment that realized that this relationship was going to last for a very long time.

Sadly though, it was starting to get to the point in which he was dozing off while standing up. So as slowly and carefully as you could you began to lead him to the bedroom. Before he could even fall into bed, literally, you were able to get him into something comfortable that wouldn't make him regret what he wore. Before going to bed yourself, you kissed his cheek and lied down.  

(I know I’m a lazy shit. Don’t hate me. But I hope you liked this non the less! Have a wonderful day/night!!)