#s3 executive meddling nonsense aside. the emotional realism! is good!

[bestworstcase]

i think what’s so interesting wrt the cassandra-rapunzel communication problem—& part of what’s frustrating about the wider fandom acting like it’s in any way cassandra’s fault that rapunzel deliberately ignores the things she says and the very clear boundaries she consistently tries to lay down—is that like

it’s not rapunzel’s fault

but i do think it’s something she does deliberately, not out of malice but because that behavior is something gothel trained her to do, by playing nasty little mind games and gaslighting the fuck out of rapunzel for eighteen years and cultivating the relationship we see in tangled wherein rapunzel is made responsible for managing gothel’s feelings and divining the true meaning behind everything she said and being punished with sly verbal abuse whenever she failed. and like, that’s the only communication model rapunzel has.

(even the situation with eugene kind of reinforced that, i think; not because eugene is in any way like gothel but because the person he initially presented himself as, flynn rider, turned out to be a façade rapunzel needed to see through in order to get to know the real eugene, which…is not that different from the interpersonal model rapunzel learned from gothel, really. people have a mask that they show you and it’s your job to ignore it and look past it and see the real face underneath, or else…bad things)

(also rapunzel gets tossed into serious princessing within WEEKS of leaving the tower so i am sure like the majority of people she interacted with at this point being POLITICIANS didn’t help, lmao)

and then she meets cassandra and. beginnings establishes that the first thing rapunzel is drawn to about cass is that cass doesn’t have a façade; cass is blunt and honest and real—(which is a perception that, tangentially, i think also contributes to rapunzel’s ongoing blindness to the social and class disparities between herself and cass, bc despite cass saying so Out Loud, Many Times, until the very end of the show raps never does quite grasp that cass has a job to do and does in fact maintain and desire a level of professionalism and separation btwn her job and her personal life in spite of her straightforward demeanor)—anyway, the point being, i think rapunzel DOES have a genuine social knack buried under all the layers of trauma and awful conditioning she got from gothel, because she’s able to identify instinctively right from the start that cassandra Isn’t Like the two-faced people rapunzel is surrounded by. which like, i’m not using two-faced as a value judgment here, just—rapunzel is surrounded by politicians and diplomats and servants and courtiers and one freshly-reformed charismatic thief and all of these people very fluently speak a social language that rapunzel doesn’t, one which requires them to play certain roles that might be wildly disconnected from their true selves, and rapunzel herself isn’t equipped to parse the distinction between that and what gothel was. so: she sees cass, who plays the game just enough to stay out of trouble but also openly chafes against it, and immediately is drawn to her because cass barely plays and openly resents the game.

so like, rapunzel knows that cass is Different From Other People and yet—even knowing that she doesn’t and honestly probably can’t just take things cass says at face value, because taking anything anyone says at face value goes against everything she’s ever been taught about how people work, and she likely legitimately cannot fathom that when cass Very Clearly says things like “we are not friends” she just… means them. & then ofc beginnings involves cass pursuing a career opportunity that would take her out of corona and rapunzel finding out and feeling personally betrayed and doubting her own instinct, which…again i think probably just reinforced this conditioning

and the end result is rapunzel through no fault of her own ends up in this WEIRD zone where she recognizes that cass is a basically honest person who doesn’t hold back much on her opinions but also rapunzel doesn’t trust that and maybe doesn’t trust her own perceptions enough to fully accept that when cass says no to something it’s okay to take her at her word—all exacerbated by the fact that cassandra at the end of the day can’t enforce boundaries with rapunzel except by expressing frustration when they’re violated, bc she’s rapunzel’s servant. so like, genuine consequences of transgressing cass’s stated boundaries aren’t even possible—it’s not like cass can remove herself from the situation! so how is raps supposed to learn better? she can’t.

but there is that deliberateness to it, because a) rapunzel has this instinctive perception of cassandra’s straightforward nature and b) cassandra herself nine times out of ten says in plain terms exactly what she wants and often why, and while it isn’t rapunzels fault that she has this fuckton of baggage ignoring what cass says in favor of trying to divine her ‘true’ feelings IS a choice that she makes, out of anxiety and self-doubt and just flat out not having ever learned any other way to treat people

& i mean i talk to death the subject of cassunzel fanon stripping cass of agency and making the uwu poor friendless repressed sad useless idiot lesbian rapunzel needs to rEsCuE and bRiNg OuT oF hEr ShELL but it’s like. not quite as but almost as frustrating how framing rapunzel as like, basically cassandras emotional support animal and also someone totally blameless and totally ignorant in her treatment of cass takes away rapunzels agency and intelligence too. (this girl grew up isolated in a tower with no one to talk to but her abuser and a chameleon and she fucking taught herself physics and astronomy and how to cook and bake and make music and paint, and you expect me to believe that in two years she never once even thought “hmm cass told me not to do this, but…”? like first all that’s not the defense of rapunzel you think it is because that level of ignorance legitimately makes people dangerous, and second of all it’s just literally not true like, in BEA/WTH rapunzel understands perfectly well that cass doesn’t want her to share cassandra’s secret with eugene and after multiple conversations on the subject decides to do it anyway! in UR she literally says out loud on two separate occasions that she knows cass doesn’t want her to pry and proceeds to do it anyway! These Are Choices She Is Making)—& i just

like the girl is anywhere from six months to three years out of a horrible isolated abusive lifelong situation depending on what part of the show you’re looking at and yeah of course her choices are shaped by her trauma but—god, they’re still HER CHOICES. and i guess i just don’t understand the appeal in watering down the agency rapunzel has in making those choices and the complexity of why, because rapunzel isn’t an idiot and she does know that cass really doesn’t want her to do things sometimes and there are times when she very openly displays discomfort or hesitation about transgressing those boundaries but does it anyway because doing what she feels like doing—to soothe her own anxiety or guilt or curiosity or whatever!—just… feels better in the moment than trying to be respectful of cassandra’s personal space. like, it’s not her fault she’s like this but if she wanted to change she absolutely could? cassandra in a lot of ways is the ideal person to learn about boundaries from because she’s the kind of person who says exactly what she means 95% of the time and if raps were to like, make a genuine effort to tackle things im positive cass would’ve been more than willing to help raps figure out some strategies for managing that anxiety—even as it is cass despite her frustration with constantly being trampled over showed rapunzel a lot of patience and understanding!! this could so easily have been something they collaborated on together and became even closer through, but… it would have been uncomfortable and rapunzel isn’t good at discomfort! she deals with it by shoving it down and pretending everything is fine even when she knows it isn’t!

& like

that’s good that’s a good thing characters having agency in their fuckups and making choices that they know aren’t right bc it happens to feel better is good—all of this is why rapunzel is such a neat character and a huge part of why tts was so great, bc it took the very rosy fantasy of rapunzel as this sweet ball of sunshine virtually untouched by the horrors of her upbringing besides her endearing naïveté and threw that out the fucking window to treat her like an actual goddamn person instead, one who does try her best but still makes mistakes and also sometimes just flat out makes shitty selfish decisions, bc trauma is messy and recovering from abuse is hard and people can be complicated and contradictory and more than just one thing, and—just, god, why would you want to take that away from her by treating every bad choice she makes as something fundamentally outside of her control?