#s!Ryan

[flower-sunflower-blog]

What I think will actually happen in the Shelter lore

Ok, so…I’m kinda nervous about this xD

I’ve been wanting for a while to share my thoughts and analysis about the lore, and what I think will actually happen. This is always the part I enjoy the most, connecting the dots, interpreting a driving direction and thus giving the whole sense to the events occurring in the story. So...

Beings above

From what we know for now, Shelter is under the control/supervision (?) of some entities, I straight up call them gods xD It's mainly because s!Artea’s straight up used this term and referred to this idea. In general, there is a recurring theme of religion within this universe. 

I also think that the gods are common knowledge for everyone, and we, the audience, are the only ones left out about indepth details about them and their nature. They seem to have great power over everything. For me, they’re in this kind of neutral-bad area, as the control they have over this world is not something we could call…legit. 

They don’t seem to be the kind of superior beings granted with perfect moral standing and act upon a greater good. They’re straight up doing what they want, based on their own rules, and get away with this only because THEY are the superior beings. And how much they’re a big deal to you depends on how much you oppose their rules. 

That's why a lot of characters can actually have a chill life under them, as they either don’t have any reason to oppose them, don’t care, are fine living here as it is implied some came from worst places, and so and so. The “before Shelter” of the characters is something interesting to figure out for me, in order to understand everyone’s position and personnal struggles. 

For now i’d say :

s!Shade and s!Elk are chilling and the gods aren’t a big deal to them, at least not yet.

s!Hoot, s!Sweev, s!Ram, and maybe s!Heiwa, were in such a bad spot before coming in the Shelter, they just love being here despite everything.

s!Hayden and s!Luh have their own personal struggles to deal with for now. Maybe sAmora and s!Veni as well ? There are small moments where they seem to have things going on in their life, but we didn't see much yet.

s!Forest and s!Void, when they talked about it, seemed rather skeptical about the god situation, but just made the best of it without making trouble. 

In between, some of them seem to have a personal struggle related to the gods. The obvious one is s!Artea, I also kinda think there is something up with s!Miel and s!Void and their relationships with god entities that are still unknown. s!Lea seemed to have kind of an involvement with the magic gods altho it’s still mysterious. And finally, s!Mine didn’t get involved with gods yet, but some hints could make us think she’s a goddess. 

Safe or fair ?

The only one for now who seemed to straight up oppose to the gods is s!Cherry, thus showing us that this opposition have consequences. And the said consequences seems to also have collateral damage sometimes. That’s why gods’ opposition seems to be a collective deal : if you get in trouble, there is a chance you’re not the only one who will suffer from it.

Actually, there is also a chance that s!Ana is the one containing them, preventing them to go even harder on people. As if the “gold sacrifice” was a ritual that allowed the good to be less likely to lash out on people. 

In general, everyone is having a rather nice life, this world is still described as “safe” and a place you can enjoy living in. BUT it may not have always been that way, because some conversation give this sort of impression that work have been done in order to make it the way it is now. Again, I think it’s greatly linked to s!Ana.

If this world is peaceful, this world doesn’t seem fair. It can become an issue when, in parallel with this overall god situation, the members have their own backstories and motives. At the end, some people are in a fairer situation than others. Clearly s!Cherry is not happy with her current situation. And some people seem in a tougher spots than others. Altho we need more details, I think it could be the case for : s!Miel, s!Lea, s!Hayden, s!Luh, recently s!Void etc. 

It’s where stand the dilemma of choosing between doing things in order maintain  peace, or doing things in order to make things right. And I IMMEDIATELY thought about s!Pomme involvement in the story. s!Pomme has the goal to keep everyone safe, and surely will make actions in order to keep everyone peaceful, I think she’ll likely side with s!Ana. But s!Pomme has also this side of her who can’t stand unfairness, who doesn't accept abiding to the will of selfish beings and their arbitrary rules, who wants to burn everything. But would she risk to put danger upon her and her friends for this ? 

Losing battle

And we finally get to s!Ana’s case. I really see s!Ana as the driving force of the story. Her goal is to keep everyone safe and peaceful, in order to do so she both have to deal with satisfying the gods and preventing them to come after them, and with the member’s personal struggle when the said struggles can be a threat to the peace. 

s!Ana is a good soul and she cares for the well being of her found family. But I also feel like she worked so hard to keep things the way they are for her efforts to be wasted. She’s currently submitting 100% to the gods, she’s doing actions for everyone's common well being. It’s such a huge burden she have to carry when she’s only one person who doesn’t always know best.While I still have not listened to the playlist, I saw that a lot of the songs allude to her not feeling adequate or strong enough. But she’s also driven by love for her family.

This being said, I think I already see how flawed her character is even if her goal is really fair, and why it seems like it’ll be the main source of challenges in the story : s!Ana is in a situation where she’s imposing this “ideal” of peace to everyone, and wants to keep the status quo. But she's not taking into consideration that the “status quo” is not ideal for everyone. And sometimes her ideal can directly conflict other’s, again s!Cherry who will really find happiness through freedom and not submission. 

She also wants to get rid of conflicts and make sure everyone reach a mutual agreement. But on hand, she’s fighting a losing battle, as she could never end up satisfying everyone, and will always end up feeling like a failure. On the other hand, I also feel like thinking too much about “solving” a conflict is ending up neglecting the reason why there was conflict in the first place, and preventing people from expressing and working out deeper issues and feelings who are the cause of the occuring tensions.  

It seems like there are a lot of communication issues in general, and people don’t get to share their struggles with others, outside of some really close relationships case, like s!Ryan and s!Miel seem to be. Again, I think this is one of the main element that will push the story forward.

I'll quickly mention s!Shade, what I find interesting is that as much as not involved they are for now with the god situation, it seem they're the most strong and loyal ally to s!Ana, along with s!Lumi. He's one of the less likely to be a threat to the peace as they're not really opposing anyone nor going through big struggles that s!Ana would have to deal with, he's mostly doing his things and minding his own business. And he seems to be in agreement with s!Ana's goals and acting to serve her best interests.

Villains

I think we're in the story where there isn't really "antagonistic" character, but rather character that have antagonistic “potential” for some arcs. We have the morally gray characters who only plays by their own rules, I’m thinking about s!Pancks and s!Bipeo, both really interesting to me.

More about s!Bipeo :

More about s!Pancks :

On a quick note, s!Pomme is already upset with s!Pancks actions when he killed the children, I think it may come up later.

Going into antagonistic potential, we have s!Jean and his hot tempered actions, but I don’t see him as a “long term” villain. Just putting here my previous analysis about s!Jean for more details :

There is s!Ryan who is in my opinion the main antagonist of this arc, she’s a slow paced villain as she’s carefully planning everything. I really love her character because her actions are driven in my opinion by inner scars. She feels really deeply human, embracing the “villainess” role in order to not be hurt anymore.

More about s!Jean and s!Ryan as villains here :

I suspect s!Miel, while not having hostile attention, being a potential chaos element bringing mayhem all around. And finally, I think s!Ana has the great potential of being both the hero/main character, both the villain in someone else’s story. 

.

.

So yeah, that’s basically my assumptions, what I think will be the main conflicts between everyone, how the story will be driven, which main themes, etc !

[huevo-lily]

okok this isnt qsmp but i think it might be the best thing ive ever drawn.. i couldve gone harder but its 3am lol

s!ryan you deserve the world (claude)

(shelter mc fanart)

[bilosan]

how buck sees eddie in 7.04 vs how eddie sees himself ↳ requested by @besosquecreanadiccion

[yawnzshit]

this part has me feral guys you don't understand RAHHHHH

[watmalik]

I sometimes wish Logan knew about Hugh Jackman like Wade knows of Ryan Reynolds, sighs. I just know he'd lose his shit when he sees what this man (that kinda looks like him) does for the other dude that looks like his boyfriend lmao

[jay-wasreblogging]

The eye fucking sex scene plus the Honda Odyssey Fucks Hard™ scene is what gave this movie it's R rating btw

[ken-dom]

Ken’s First Orgasm

Ken x reader

1.1k words

Summary: Since Ken entered the real world, he’s been experiencing some… feelings (AKA a good orgasm might calm him down)

Author’s Notes: It’s smutty, it’s tongue-in-cheek, it’s a little bit silly… just take it for what it is, enjoy the Kenergy and have fun 🩷

This was my first Ken fic, originally posted to my main blog under the title 'Ken's First Time.' Due to a tagging issue on my main, I'm reposting my works here to have everything in one place.

Warnings/content: NSFW, 18+, first kiss, first orgasm, making out, dry humping, hand job, gn!reader, Ken’s self doubt and nerves (and crying)

‘I’ve been getting these… urges, like, there’s something stirring deep inside me that I can’t seem to tame,’ Ken uttered huskily, fingers toying with the hair by your ear. ‘I think it might be because I’m craving… this.’

Biting his lip, he stared deep into your eyes, the heat of his gaze dropping down to your lips before slowly leaning in.

When you followed his lead, breath quickening as you tilted your head, he faltered, pulling back with a quiet growl and balling his fists in frustration.

He had hung on your every word all day, never taking his eyes off you for a single moment. And you’d noticed the way he lit up every time you looked at him… but now, you began to wonder if you’d done something to put him off.

‘Ken?’ you breathed carefully.

‘I- I’ve never…’ he hesitated.

Oh. That’s all it was. You dipped your head to meet his sparkling eyes again.

‘You’ve never kissed anyone?’ you asked gently, lifting your palm to rest softly against his handsome cheek.

Ken cleared his throat and forced a smile. ‘I’ve tried. Lots of times.’ He lifted his chin with mock confidence, as though trying to kiss was some sort of proud accomplishment. ‘You know how it can be.’

‘It’s alright,’ you soothed, rubbing your thumb soothingly over his cheekbone. Your mind raced with what else he probably hadn’t done either, the thought causing heat to pool at your core. ‘We’ll take it at your pace.’

The silky tone of your voice and the comfort of your words made him feel… dizzy? He blinked his gaze away, blushing. Feeling it again. That pull of something deep in his gut that made him want to submit himself to… whatever it was his body was craving so much. Damn it, he really needed to just get over it and kiss you.

You smiled warmly, leaning in again with pause enough to allow him time to decide. To your delight, he pressed forward, lips crashing soft and wet against yours, and as you parted your lips to encourage his tongue, he moaned loudly into your mouth while his fingertips drove hard into the flesh at your waist.

Lost in the intensity of the moment, it was suddenly hard to remember to breathe, his needy whines and desperate grabbing clouding your thoughts, causing your legs to tremble, but eventually you pulled away, panting.

‘Wow, Ken… that was-’

‘Terrible! I mean, you… you were great. I had no idea what I was doing. I'm not made for kissing, I’m only good at Beach.’ He shook his head, frustrated. ‘I shouldn’t have- mmh!… mmm…’

You shut him up instantly, diving back for more and inadvertently pushing him to lay back on the bed. You straddled him naturally, conscious thought still lost in the haze of excitement.

‘You- you liked it?’ he breathed huskily as you pulled up to get a look at how pretty he was, breathless with anticipation beneath you.

You nodded, humming in approval. ‘And it feels like you did too,’ you smirked, grinding down against his already aching erection.

The noise he made was unearthly, a growl and a whimper and a groan and a desperate exhale all at once. The pressure he had been feeling there released ever so slightly with a small pearl of precum, affording him a moment of bliss between the aching neediness.

You stilled, worried you’d hurt him somehow, but his eyes widened revealing pupils dilated to the size of dinner plates, and you realised it had been a sound of pleasure, not pain.

‘What… was… THAT?’ he cried out breathlessly. ‘That felt incredible! Sublime! That’s it! That’s what I’ve been craving?! Do it again? Please-’

The last word tapered into a whine as you rolled your hips to grind against him again, and he flopped down onto the pillow, eyes rolling back with overwhelming sensations he couldn’t find the words for.

‘Ken?’ you asked softly, leaning down, ‘you’ve never had an orgasm before have you?’

He shook his head.

‘Do you want to?’

He couldn’t catch his breath and his reply came out as a husky whisper. ‘Will it feel like that again?’

‘Better,’ you grinned wickedly.

‘Oh fuck, yes,’ he mumbled, not even realising he’d sworn. ‘Please.’

You leaned in to kiss him again, igniting the flames inside him that had been roaring since the first time you held his hand. Ken moaned in anticipation, closing his eyes tightly, composing and preparing himself.

You rocked your hips only once more and he exploded, fists bunching the sheets while you continued to writhe against him, his back arching off the bed and tears prickling at his eyes as his orgasm tore through every fibre of his being.

It was like nothing else. How had he never so much as wondered what this would be like until he had entered the real world and discovered human feelings and thoughts… and needs.

His chest heaved as he came down from his high, lazily lifting an arm to rest over his forehead in complete surrender while he tried to claw his way back to the present, with you.

When he opened his eyes, he was met with you smiling down at him, nothing short of smug.

‘Was that- did I-?’ he stuttered.

‘You sure did,’ you panted, heart pounding and heat rushing down to keeping your own arousal simmering. God, he was a picture, mussed hair and pink cheeks and heavy eye lids.

‘Oh… oh, that was, it was-’

You chuckled, climbing off him to settle at his side, where he turned to face you.

‘Should I have… you know? Was there something I didn’t do? You didn’t…’

The concern in his eyes was endearing, but you laughed again and he relaxed. Another tear slid down his cheek as you caressed his arm tenderly.

‘Don’t worry, Ken, we have time for that. I get the feeling you’ll be great at… doing stuff. Besides, that wasn’t quite the whole thing. I’m glad it felt good, but there’s a lot more I can show you. If you want me to…’

Ken snorted a disbelieving laugh. ‘Well, good, because these urges I’ve been getting? I think they might have actually been for-’

‘Orgasms,’ you interrupted with a smirk. ‘Yeah, humans tend to get that a lot.’

‘I’m not surprised! How do you get through the day without doing that at regular intervals?’

You laughed, gently wiping the tears from his cheeks. ‘It will calm down when you’re a little more used to it. In the meantime… let’s make the most of your libido, yes?’

‘Absolutely,’ he agreed eagerly, as though the word libido meant anything at all to him. Nevertheless, he was as eager as anything for another round.

‘I’m going to start undressing you this time… if that’s alright?’ you muttered seductively, kissing at his collar bone while your fingers toyed with the buttons of his shirt.

‘Of course. You don’t have a body like mine for nothing. Well, I suppose it’s main purpose is for Beach, but-’

‘Ken?’

‘Yeah?’

You didn’t use any more words, and he suddenly lost all concept of his own thoughts when your hand slid inside his beach shorts.

‘How does this feel?’ you whispered as your fingers wrapped loosely around his thick length and pumped slowly, lightly. You didn’t want to overwhelm him too soon.

‘R-real- f-fucking- oh!- good, hnnng…’

[poppingmary]

Robert Ryan and Nita Talbot in “On Dangerous Ground” - 1951

[randommmthoughts]

This looks great out of context

[flower-sunflower-blog]

s!Ryan theory part 1/3 : Sun, keeper of the flame, breaker of the day

So, I’m finally getting on s!Ryan, what I’ve been figuring out so far, my theories and the different possibilities I could think of !

s!Ryan is a complex character that is giving me a hard time since a while, don’t get me wrong I really enjoy it - but still it’s hard xD Her story is conveyed through a multiformat storytelling and various hints spread around like pieces of puzzle. And everything is tying to a general story you need to figure out in order to connect everything.

That’s why it was so hard to share my thoughts about her, even small, compared to other characters. Because most of the time to understand my points you had to know about this one hint, connected to this other hint that made me think that, and could’ve explained this etc. My mind was a mess xD

BUT I tried to put everything into order, and through a 3 part theory, I'll try to go through everything as much as possible ! In order to give a better picture about her lore, the real mysteries about her, as well as a general context/timeline of event.

And yeah 3 parts, because s!Ryan is THAT much of a headache /lh

I hope we could be on a same page this way, so pay attention and follow me through this ! (if you're interested of course ;D)

This is the first part who will be discussing s!Ryan’s nature and powers, as well as her link with the sun.

The second part will be about her past, mostly based on her playlist "the origin story". And the last part will be about her connections with other people.

s!Ryan references and appearance

Let’s start with the “easiest” part. s!Ryan is looking like this : 

On her pinterest board, we can see references for her fairy-looking outfit. 

s!Ryan seems to like flowers/have a connection with it, she has a texture pack based on it. It looks like she’s a fairy, her connection with flowers and nature in general would make sense. 

Another interesting detail about her : she’s ginger. There are multiple references of ginger hair. 

I know this is shocking news for everyone xD BUT for realsies, keep in mind that s!Ryan has ginger hair on her pinterest board. More specifically, fully ginger-hair. It’s important for later.

Then something I noticed was various elements about fortune telling : crystal ball, tarot cards, palm reading. 

There is also this, that I found out to be "perfume". (Well at least that's what google told me)

It could be in line with fortune telling, it may even refer to something else unknown to us. But in general it just give up a certain vibe/aesthetic from her. 

s!Ryan and the sun

Omg guys, now we're getting onto the real deal, make sure to follow through everything xD

s!Ryan is heavily, heavily tied to the “sun”. There are so many hints about the sun, the light, the sunrays in general.

First when you look at her pinterest board you can notice them easily :

I also tend to think the sun has a divine essence in this world, i'll go more on that in a bit.

s!Ryan has a deep connection with the sun within herself. On twitter, she dropped 2 hints that highlighted it.

First there is this one :

Then there's this one : 

The description is a line coming from the song "The Moon will sing", and the next line is “I loved you like the sun”.

(note : it’s not the only time I’ll talk about these 2 hints, it will come up on later posts)

Finally, half of her hair became blonde at some point. Ryan said it was related to her lore, she didn't described it as something new, but as a part of her already existing but that she started to “show” little by little. And recently, her second eye started to glow.

Looking at it for a bit, I definitely think about the sun. We had hints and references, but it's almost like this eye and her blonde hair color is sort of physical mark of her connection with the sun.

The divine sun

So now it’s clear that s!Ryan is connected to the sun. But what kind of connection ? That’s where things get complicated for real. 

First of all, in order to have the slightest idea, we need to understand the nature of the sun to begin with. I said earlier that I think the sun has a divine essence, however I purposefully didn’t say that the sun was a god. Because nothing can be certain yet and that's even the whole question.

On a general note, I think the Shelter has a specific “theology” let's say, which was agreed upon everyone. Thus meaning that even if there is individual lore about member’s involvement with some gods, I think it’s still tied to this theology common to everyone, related to the specifics about the gods’ nature and everything, that is still unknown to us. 

Going back to the sun, what makes the question complicated and why.

We had confirmation that there are “gods” in plural. At one point s!Artea and s!Forest were discussing gods while the sun was up, and when they criticized them a lightning stroke on them. 

That means there were gods above them when the sun was up, and after all since we had the confirmation that there was a “moon entity”, why not a “sun entity” ?

However though, we have no certainty that was coming from the sun itself, it could always have been another god while the sun was up.

Then at another point, s!Cherry said that the sun was too bright and hurted her eyes, which s!Ryan found suspicious.

It really looked similar to when s!Artea was saying that the “moon” is “watching them”, not to mention that s!Cherry is particularly hostile to the gods. 

But the sun could also be a concept more abstract, holding a great power over everything and be an incarnation of a divine essence, while not being a “sentient” being. 

And even if the sun is a god, or at least related to a specific god, we know there is multiple gods.

Some of them are qualified as “dramatic” and “petty” by s!Cherry. However, there is no confirmation that all the gods and deities of this place are acting the same, and that the sun god is “among” the gods s!Cherry called petty.

On a general note, that's the main challenge about having multiple gods : we have no certainty all deities works the same, share a common nature, are on a similar scale etc

Not to mention that if you listen to s!Ryan playlist, there is a recurring theme about monotheistic religion : “hell”, “heaven”, “god", “devil” etc. Another reason to think the sun could possibly work on different rules. The sun may refer mainly to the "holiness" (you'll see I'll have the occasion to get on that later ^^).

But it’s also possible that the “sun entity” is indeed a sentient being with not-so-great morals too. That's also an interesting point to explore, but not on this post yet !

In conclusion, there is a whole lot of possibilities, and while we have some hints, there isn't much yet to tend to one more than another.

That's what you have to understand, and the reason why it makes it so challenging to theorise on.

But

I think there is definitely a form of cult around the sun, whether the sun is indeed a deity or an abstract/symbolic divine concept.

There is this picture that comes from s!Void’s board 

It makes me think that the cult with the sun tie to the general theology of Shelter.

 

s!Ryan’s powers and divinity

So you know now why the sun's nature is a complicated question. But so is s!Ryan’s, oh so is s!Ryan's.

For starters, Ryan confirmed her character isn't human neither an elf. I tend to think s!Ryan is a fairy, however it doesn’t end here.

Beyond the "specie's name", there is a question of "technicality". If s!Ryan is indeed a fairy, what does being a “fairy” in this world means exactly? After all, s!Cherry was also hinted to be a fairy, would it make them related in one way or another ? 

And since s!Cherry was hinted to be directly from the Shelter, would it also be the case for s!Ryan ? Are all the fairies related to the Shelter and magic tree in general ? That's also something that needs to be uncovered.

Going back to s!Ryan, her being a “fairy like” creature would be in line with the magic elements. She said her magic powers were lightning, light and fire-like elements.

But there's likely even more to it. At one point s!Ryan said “did they forget who I am, do they know the power that I have ?” hinting that her “true nature” is really powerful and that she didn't reach her full capacity yet :

Not to mention she said she “knows people with great power” while looking at the tree.

The tree, magic gods, you know xD

At one point, when s!Artea was shocked s!Ryan could fly, and asked how it was possible, she just answered she was “god’s favorite”. What could it mean ?

And now tying everything with s!Ryan's connection with the sun : s!Ryan is often directly compared to the sun. When we look at it, her powers (light, fire, lightning) seems related to the sun.

She's hinting having a great power, that she's starting to show her "true nature" through her current appearance. That when she started having half blonde hair, and recently had a glowing eye, who made me think of a physical mark of her connection with the sun.

Finally we have this coming from her board :

"Sun, keeper of flame, Breaker of day, I gave you my sword, my heart and my faith"

I think s!Ryan is holding her current powers from the sun, a kind of power that probably reaches a divine level.

But how comes ? What kind of link does s!Ryan have with divinity ?

That’s where there are multiple options possible, and we’ll go from the highest degree to lower degree : 

She could be the sun entity herself, thus a goddess. Maybe her having her “powers” coming from the sun means that she draws power from this divine essence, she “incarnate” its power. 

She could be related to the gods, either fully or partially. Maybe directly related to the sun deity, or to another deity while she would still worship the sun, no matter its nature. 

She could have made a “contact” with the deities which allowed her to “reach” this state and power, thus meaning her divine side recent. It could be either the sun deity, who would be an entity of its own in this case, either another kind of deity able to grant her powers from the sun.

She could not be divine, and her power would only come from what “gods” granted her. The subtle difference the previous case is that, while having divine powers, its not fully "hers" and the gods could take it back from her any time.

And among all those options, there may be even more I didn't think of yet. Again, there is so much possibilities.

There is various possibilities about the sun's real nature, as well as various possibilities about s!Ryan's. So figuring out s!Ryan's nature in parallel with her connection with the sun leaves us with soooo many option.

(When it comes to theorising, I think something important is avoiding to jump on the "obvious" conclusions, and instead try to think of all the possible interpretations possible :D)

There is one last thing I need to cover up :

The Ryans

It all started in the beginning of the Shelter. Ryan was turning people into clones on herself, chasing people around to submit them and "convert" them to the "Ryans cult"

And IF you don't believe me yet when I say that in this story, genuinely EVERYTHING can be lore, that should definitely proves you otherwise xD

Because at first, I didn't think it could be lore either, I thought it was just silly goofy fun. But then I discovered this :

Not only that, during one of s!Ryan lore stream, she referred to the Ryans again.

"The Ryans will attack, the Ryans will get them".

There is clearly something to uncover about the "Ryans" and what they truly are, and how it could possibly connects to s!Ryan's nature.

Changing who I was...

So ! We kinda covered everything about s!Ryan's powers, the hints and specifics, the mysteries and all the possible theories about her true nature. Well, "all the possible theories" not exactly yet :D

I talked about how s!Ryan could be a non divine fairy, or be divine through various degrees. But between a mere non divine and a divine being, there is one last option I didn't cover yet, an option in between. An option that I purposefully left at the end because it has interesting implications.

But before everything, there is some context to place. From now one, we'll try slowly but surely to introduce a timeline of event. The chronology from past s!Ryan, to s!Ryan coming from the tree until current s!Ryan.

There is something I wanted to bring your attention on. We know that s!Ryan has this sort of connection with the sun and hold her power from it. But since when ?

The first hint was posted before the stream where s!Ryan revealed her power, that she could fly. And if she had her half-blonde her since the trial, it's also where she revealed it was part of her lore.

And again, she did not described it as something "new" that appeared, but something already existing in her that she was "showing".

There is something to know about the description of her tweets : these are lyrics from the song "If I killed someone for you". Moreover, it's a song she has in her playlist ! And here, let me put you the full verse of the song :

You have to understand that The one I killed is me Changing what I was For what you wanted me to be I followed your direction Did everything you asked I hope that makes you happy 'Cause there's just no turning back

My interpretation is that, the power she has now, she didn't have it before, it's "recent". She had to do something in order to, there is something she had to "change".

But what was it ? And who is this "you" she may be referring to ? Again, there is a lot of possibilities. My main goal is to showcase everything and let you guys have your own prefered interpretation afterward :D

I said earlier that I think that her blonde hair, as well as her eye since recently, is a physical mark of her connection with the sun/power she holds from the "sun".

About her hair ! Do you remember how I said at the beginning that s!Ryan has ginger hair on her pinterest board ? And that it was something important ?

Here we are now : there is only ginger hair on her board, there isn’t ginger-blonde hair.

And just in case, I looked it up, and there are reference pictures for ginger-blonde hair on pinterest. Ryan could have put a reference for this, but she didn't. Why ?

Maybe she didn't think about it, or just didn't want to for no particular reason. But I have a possible interpretation that it was a purpose, and that there is actually a reason why.

I think the board focuses either on non temporal/general elements (reference outfits, fortune telling elements, powers etc), either element specifically from the past.

My theory :

Past s!Ryan= ginger --> Current s!Ryan= ginger-blonde

And having that in mind, it may show us that in the past, s!Ryan didn't have these hair, thus possibly meaning she didn't have powers from the sun at that time as she does right now.

But since when she had these power from the sun ? Again, s!Ryan said she was showing something "existing" in her through her hair, not something new.

But "existing" since when ?

Nothing is sure. Because right now, I'm only talking about the powers she has "now", that she hinted to go through a "change" to reach.

Maybe she didn't have powers at all before this "change" ? Maybe she had powers before but became more powerful ? Maybe she always had access to these power but decide now to use it ? (After all, at one point s!Ryan mention "my potential, what I possibly could be")

But that's not all I have to say. Because there is actually something I ended up being certain of.

There is at least one key event when we can be sure she "at the very least" hold these powers since then.

It's the "change" she's talking about.

And what is it ?

Her death

This hint mention a "slumber" that she woke up from. I saw it as a glince of the moment when she was brought in the Shelter by the tree. But the important part is that she "woke up" in general and what it actually mean :

s!Ryan died and was ressurected.

Let me put you again the lyrics from the song "If I killed someone for you"

You have to understand that The one I killed is me Changing what I was For what you wanted me to be

So, there is 2 thing to add to this :

I was certain that s!Ryan "death" was in the metaphorical sense"of "killing her old self", "changing" who she was before. And then I evoked the possibility that it was also in the litteral sense. But now I'm *convinced* it is ALSO in the litteral sense. And I'll have the occasion to tell you more about it later.

Past s!Ryan (ginger hair)

⬇️

s!Ryan's death ("change")

⬇️

Current s!Ryan (ginger-blonde hair)

Even tho I think s!Ryan's "death" is litteral, I think that the most impactful aspect is still the fact that her death was "metaphorical". In fact, this is for me the all core of s!Ryan's character, and something that allow us to understand more her current personnality.

The Saint

So ! I think s!Ryan holding the current power she has is something recent that we can date at least since her death. But what about her connection with the sun in general ?

I think s!Ryan always had this connection with the sun. And if it's not in a magical way, it is at a very least in the metaphorical way.

And I finally get into the possibility I was talking earlier, the possibility about s!Ryan being something "in between" a divine and a non divine being :

This are hints about the sun, again. But these one are really particular in the "aesthetic", it’s giving up a symbolic about “saint” and “holiness”.

You know how I said that there is a cult around the sun’s deity ? Maybe s!Ryan would have been part of it, and even more ?

This is the last option, something that I think is similar to s!Ana : the fact that s!Ryan would be a priestess of the sun, a “saint” in it's cult, even an angel ?

She wouldn’t be a god, but would be above the mere “non divine” beings.

-> That’s where getting it to tie to a “general theology” would make a change, because it would allow us to figure out the different role anybody could occupy in this.

The gold element is something common to s!Ana's board. And it would explain this quote !

Her being a “saint” would have allowed her to reach a deeper connection with the sun, and would explain why her nature is so tied to it.

One last minute element I could think of : You know how s!Ryan call s!Pomme "sister Pomme" ? Well, it also happen that s!Pomme is hinting to be an angel/saint, and related to "monotheistic" element like "heaven" just like s!Ryan. It may be something relevent ?

It wouldn't mean there are sisters in the "litteral" since, but it would be a hint to the fact that they share a similar nature ?

And on a /meta note, I know there is a context to the "sister Pomme" nickname. But Lumi and Ryan could've talk about it behind the scenes and be like "oh yeah let's make it fit with the lore". It would fit both of their way of storytelling xD

But if she was indeed a prietress/saint/angel/you get me, was it from her own will ? Of from birth ? Does she still consider herself this way ?

I also said earlier that s!Ryan has a connection with the sun within herself. But maybe this connection is to take metaphorically, as an allegory ?

There could be a symbolic about her being similar to the sun, "like the sun". This idea of being "holy", being a sunshine angel.

And we're finally getting to it. The reason why I wanted to develop this point at the end of the post, the one implication I ended up being certain about past s!Ryan :

s!Ryan was a saint before.

And whether or not she was a saint in the literal sense, I mean that I'm pretty certain she was metaphorically a saint, an incarnation of a perfect girl who was acting like a beacon of light for people around her.

But then she died, she "killed" her old self and she changed, going from a saint to a devil.

And this will be for part 2 !

Thanks for your attention :D

[huevo-lily]

S!Ryan warmup sketch :)

(wasnt going to post but it turned out way nicer than i thought lmao)

[cloth-fabric]

ryan lo - ss19

[1mm4d13]

Fantastic f#cking movie.

[watmalik]

Hugh Jackman must be stopped.

[crypticthumbs]

ghouls and ghosts, and pigeons that go "woo" in the night

[ken-dom]

Stay Quiet, Stay Near, Stay Close

Colt Seavers x gn!reader

2.2k words

∘₊✧ Summary: You help Colt unwind with a hot bath and a massage.

Can be read as a part two to my previous Colt fic or can be standalone.

∘₊✧ Author’s notes: I don’t know what it is about Colt Seavers (particularly with long hair) that makes me desperately want to soothe him via handjob but here you have the second version of exactly that — unlikely to be the last! @heresthestorymorningglory was my partner in crime as usual and gave me the perfect Colt song for the title, from Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional.

∘₊✧ Warnings/content: nsfw, hot bath, hair washing, massage, handjob, praise, crying, before during and aftercare!! Long hair Colt!

∘₊✧─────────────────────✧₊∘

Even beneath the shimmering softness of warm, soapy bath water, Colt’s body lays heavily against yours as he sinks further into your safe, massaging hands.

With your legs either side of his waist and his back to your chest, you can feel every breath he takes, slow and steady. It’s kind of like a physical meditation that soothes you from the outside in, and you wonder how heavy you’ve become, too, while you’ve been soothing his aches away.

His head rests, lolling in the crook of your neck with long damp strands of blonde sticking to your flesh among the rising steam, slightly darker where the tips have met the water.

Kneading the flesh at his broad shoulders in a soothing rhythm, you bite your lip to resist the urge to let your fingers wander. You want to slide them further down his muscular arms and caress those firm contours, but that would be purely for your own pleasure and this is about Colt.

You can’t quite see his face from here, just a glimpse of his handsome profile out of the corner of your eye, but you can hear the infrequent little catches of breath and feel the way he tenses up for a moment every time he bites back a moan.

You can see the rest of his body clearly enough though, golden in the warmth of the candlelight. His slowly rising and falling chest, his knees protruding from beneath the bubbles where his legs are spread, feet planted firmly beside yours. And you can see the way his body is reacting to your touch; as your eyes drag over his form again, you notice his fingers tighten their grip around the rim of the bathtub.

‘Huhng-’ he grunts, knuckles turning white.

‘Sorry,’ you breathe, withdrawing your fingers and gradually resuming the more measured pace you’d set before letting yourself get carried away with his big strong arms carrying you and the way his muscles might flex as he touches you, and accidentally pressed your thumbs just a little too sharply into his shoulders.

‘S’alright,’ he slurs, dropped against you again, far too relaxed to bother much about separating words unnecessarily. ‘Felt good.’

Oh.

Despite sharing a hot bathtub, your naked bodies pressed together under hot, steamy water, you’re very aware that you’re here because you’re trying to help him relax, to ease his pain and hopefully to get a good night’s sleep. But the way your body reacted to those two innocent words that dripped off his tongue like warm honey — Felt good —  isn’t exactly conducive to focussing solely on Colt’s shoulder tension.

You close your eyes and recompose yourself.

‘You… want me to do that again?’ you offer, hands hovering, and Colt nods his approval with a quiet hum.

Watching his hands closely, you dig the pads of your thumbs firmly above his shoulder blades, loosening the knots you can feel there with a little more force than before. You feel him jolt as you work them out, and see his knuckles turn white again as his fingers grip the edge of the tub.

And you hear him moan.

Oh no.

You know Colt’s moans exceptionally well. They’re always so loud and unrestrained, and you’re surprised he’s lasted this long through a massage without one or two escaping until now. No mistake, you want to hear them – of course you do! But you’re not sure how good of a job you’ll make of soothing him for a restful night when all you can think about is the way he sounds when you pleasure him.

Please him, you correct yourself.

Then again. Perhaps that would help…

You slow the rhythmic circles to a stop. It’s reluctant, but necessary if you’re going to at least attempt to concentrate. You can always return to rubbing steady patterns into his supple flesh as he lays in bed beside you later. With that in mind, you grab the shampoo bottle to move things along.

‘Scalp next, handsome,’ you say softly, mindful that he’s already somewhat of a puddle and the last thing he needs is a bolt of your over-enthusiasm at getting your fingers tangled in his luscious hair.

‘Mmmh,’ he hums, not even bothering to nod this time. He can feel himself melting against you, feel how heavy he must be becoming while he actually feels like he’s floating.

You wonder if washing his hair will finally send him off to sleep and you’ll have to drag him out of the bath after somehow managing to slide yourself out from underneath his burly frame… but whatever. He needs it, it’s working, let him have it. Worry about the rest later, post-hair wash and scalp massage.

You squeeze out a dollop of shampoo, warming it between your palms, sliding your fingers from the nape of his neck and up, deliberate and so sensual that Colt begins to hum again. It’s a little more high pitched this time. Whiny.

He shivers against you, skin prickling with tingles, and with some effort, he lifts his head to allow you the space to continue exactly what you’re doing. Don’t stop, he thinks, but he isn’t sure how to say it out loud. Maybe he is saying it? He can’t quite tell. It doesn’t matter. You’re not stopping. He knows you won’t stop as long as he needs it. 

A low groan drags from his throat, though, head as heavy in your hands now as his torso feels against yours, and his hair tangles around your fingers as they drag, slow and mesmerising, over his scalp. Another little moan.

You allow your eyes to drag over what you can see of his body again. As a treat. The way the light dances on the contours of his chest, those husky arms, the tip of his thick cock appearing from beneath the bathwater…

Oh.

‘B-blended… ice…’

You’re brought back to your senses by Colt’s incoherent muttering, realising that your fingernails are scraping quite harshly against his scalp, but he mustn’t mind it too much because there’s still a low groan lacing his stuttered words.

‘Spicy…’

Margaritas. He’s putty in your hands, achingly hard, and muttering about margaritas. 

This is the man you adore. And he needs you.

You rinse the shampoo away as best you can at this angle, and reach for the conditioner, squeezing a helping onto your palm.

‘Wanna make margaritas later?’ he drawls. It's the most coherent he’s sounded since insisting that you use the neroli and amber bath bubbles he likes, but that was before climbing into the tub and immediately melting, mind and body, against you.

Even Colt isn’t sure where his question came from because all he can think about now is how he wants your hands, soft, clever, precise hands, between his thighs now instead. Another question he isn’t sure how to translate from hazy thought to speech. But margaritas, sure. That appears out of nowhere.

Maybe he isn’t sleepy at all but just… zen? Random thoughts he matches up with feeling close to you spilling out while he feels safe enough to let them?

‘I think we can stretch to margaritas if you’re not too relaxed to sit up,’ you appease him.

‘Mmh. I’ll manage.’

‘You sure about that?’

You finally allow a hand to glide down over his chest, soft from the steam, and rest it at his belly where the water gently laps against your movements.

Your breath catches in your throat at how firm he feels under your palm, the way he trembles just slightly as your hand travels lower. The way he whines.

His breath catches at the exact same moment; your touch sending tingles coursing down to his core. The hazy air thickens in the split second that you both freeze, and he grits his teeth, seeming to regain some coherence now you’re doing exactly what he wanted. Kind of embarrassing though, right? To get a hardon from a scalp massage and the way your fingers pulled at the long strands in the process…

‘Was kinda hoping you wouldn’t notice.’

‘Pretty hard not to,’ you reply under your breath, but he hears you and you can practically feel his smirk. ‘You know, I’ve heard that hair conditioner has some excellent… other uses.’

‘Oh?’

You slide your other arm around his waist, revealing your palmful of the silky product.

‘Trust me?’

‘Yeah-hhhnnng-’

Your fingers close around his length, conditioner-covered palm coating the half of him visible above the water. He shifts to reveal more and you begin to stroke, long and slow, kneading lightly, just as you had with his aching muscles.

But it’s easier to massage with the addition of this impromptu aid, the thick, glossy liquid allowing your hand to glide over his skin with ease.

‘Feel good?’ You press your mouth to his neck, keeping the pace of your slicked up hand steady as your tongue slips from between your lips and drags over the sensitive flesh, lips closing now and again to nip at his skin and feel him shudder.

His cock twitches inside your grip, strong enough that you can feel it begging you to jerk him faster before his blissed out brain catches up and he moans, ‘Please- please-’

He’s bucking his hips enough that the gentle lapping of the water escalates to loud sloshing against the sides of the tub and hot, scented water splashes over onto the floor, steaming puddles quickly cooling against the tiles.

Every laboured breath Colt takes in is exhaled laced with a grunt or a low whimper, echoing around the room and surrounding you both with the sounds of his pleasure. It’s turning desperate though, and you don’t want him desperate. You want him to enjoy the journey, ride it out with nothing but bliss.

‘Shhh,’ you soothe him, working the heel of your other palm over his shoulder again as you stroke his cock in the same rhythm. ‘It’s ok. Tell me what you need.’

The combination of the soothing touch at his shoulder and the electric touch lower down – the one setting something ablaze in his gut – is driving Colt wild.

You can feel it radiating from his pores and don’t require a verbal response to decipher what he needs. He needs exactly this, until he doesn’t anymore. And then he’ll need you.

‘You need to cum, don’t you, baby? Is that it?’

Colt’s head drops back against your shoulder, heavy again as the tension that’s been coiling, hot in his gut, subsides with the increased speed of your hand and the languid swipes of your thumb over his steadily leaking tip.

He manages a low hum, and you don’t push it. You could carry on, slow your hand back down and force him to use words, to beg, before you’ll allow his release. But that’s not the point of this, and it’s not what you want. You want him sated and comforted and safe. 

‘It’s alright, let go for me,’ you coo, and without a beat, he does, a thick creamy rope splattering up over his chest and dripping down, mingling into the bath water.

A growl tears from his throat as his peak hits, tapering off into a weak little whimper, and he slumps, his weight almost crushing you if it wasn’t for the small volume of water still in the tub with you. Colt wonders if you’ll notice the tears dropping into it.

You do, but you say nothing. In another position, you’d have wiped his cheeks, so instead you file it away.

You manage to release the bath plug with your foot, letting the water drain as you hoist him forward and upward, clumsily reaching around for a jug of fresh, warm water to rinse the both of you off. Untangling your bodies, already sweaty from shared heat, you climb out and wrap yourself and then him in a fluffy towel and help him climb out of the tub.

Colt’s legs feel wobbly, and his head is spinning a little as his blood finds its way back from his core to his extremities. The heat of the water he’s been soaking in for probably too long isn’t doing much to help matters. He feels woozy, but still safe.

Before he knows it, you’ve dried him off, guided him onto his bed, plumped his pillows to support his back, and slipped his favorite joggers on for him. He can’t remember if he saw you bothering with underwear, and he doesn’t care. He can feel aftershocks in his soft cock, and it’s reassuring, somehow.

You realise as you sit on the edge of the bed that you didn’t actually condition his hair. You’re careful not to cause any knots where it’s still wet as you brush through it for him. It doesn’t matter. Next time, you will, if the feel or smell of it doesn’t get him too excited and distract you both again.

Colts whole body feels incredibly silky against the fabrics, and he can’t remember ever feeling quite this good as he wriggles against the sheets, settling in. 

‘Still want that margarita?’ you tease, and with his eyelids too heavy to keep open now, he just huffs a gentle laugh and lets sleep wash over him.