#ruusan skirata

[mamuzzy]

— BLACK & WHITE MENTALITY —

Me, as someone with a Borderline Personality Disorder (and probably other I'm still figuring out), am I truly convinced that I’m a very logical person. The logic doesn’t have to make sense to other people, it is enough for me that I know, that there is a logic and deep thought behind everything I say or think. The problem starts when people opposing my logic, and no matter how I try to make my point visible, I will look like this in the end:

It is also a problem in general with Cluster B type personality disorders, because by our logic, we can explain EVERYTHING, why don’t we have to take responsibility for certain things we do or have done. Or worse, we want to take responsibility AND explain, and people will accuse us of wanting to find excuses and we will never meet with understanding.

Ordo can pretty much explain why he usually choose violence to solve imminent problems and not exactly taking responsibility for hurting people. Like punching Maze in the face TWICE it's not overreacting from his part, it's the stupid Alpha's fault that he is stubborn, obviously and nothing else works. /sarcasm

(more under the cut)

Finding patterns is an ability that is actually very great when I write metas or stories. I see patterns everywhere. In real life? Not so great. Because while people are showing mostly predictable behaviour patterns and we learn to understand the logical steps between how something comes from where (yes, even emotions can be explained logically), we can’t always keep one thing in mind: VARIABLES.

Like… what do you mean that my usual very kind and patient friend said something hurtful and they didn’t have patience for me like usual??? What do you mean that they have shitty day so they entire behaviour pattern changes according to their mood??? What do you mean that they won’t show the same shitty-day patterns on the next shitty day??? How am I supposed to prepare for my friend’s shitty days???? Kind is kind, shitty is shitty, friend cannot be both! Right? RIGHT…? … … Right…?

Imagine that person with personality disorder is like working with CONDITIONALS in the programming language. IF you do [something] then it’s either [this] OR [that]. There is no third options and you have choose.

THIS or THAT. ALWAYS or NEVER. ALL or NOTHING.

Always the extremes. Black and white mentality is a cognitive distortion, it means that we are having trouble seeing the world as it is: constantly changing, constantly evolving, devolving, always in the move. It has to be static, IT HAS TO BE SAFE AND PREDICTABLE.

Finding the middle ground is especially hard for us, and when I met a certain quote in the books, I kind of felt understood here.

There are lot of instances where the narrative says, you are either friends of the Nulls they would die for or an enemy they didn’t kill yet. It sounds dramatic but it actually FEELS this dramatic too.

Let’s break this in the language of PD.

You are…

A friend I would die for

An enemy I didn’t have to kill yet

If you feel like that there should be more nuanced options between the two, then you feel it right. Because in real life, your relationship with people are also nuanced. You have acquaintances. You have close friends. You have not so close-friends. You have co-workers you share a lunch but not personal informations. You have neighbors occasionally borrow sugar from, and you have neighbors you only say hello at the stairs, and you have neighbors you gossip with. You have close family members and family members we only love from distance and then you have family members you avoid like a plague. You have co-workers you hate. You hate that cashier because of their vibes, but you like the other one, but overall, you don’t speak a word to each other.

Now the real world equivalent of the Null’s mindset would be

A person I would die for

People I literally don’t give a single shit about

And then Ruusan comes into the picture. Ordo and the Nulls suddenly can’t place her everywhere between the two option. They don’t like this person, but this person actually never hurt them personally. They have to force themselves to break the computer code based of rigid conditionals to create new options to label her. Nulls, and especially Ordo can’t stand her, because he is jealous, he feels threatened by her presence, and Ordo is terribly afraid that she makes him less valuable in Kal’s eyes because she is Kal’s biological daughter. Also because with this black & white mentality usually comes pragmatism too, he is not convinced that Ruu is not here for golddigging. Her presence simply makes them angry and irritated and they can’t deal with these feelings.

Brain: BASH HER SKULL WITH A ROCK!!! Ordo: No. Brain: BUT SHE THREATENS YOUR LIFE! Ordo: I’m not in danger. I’m just angry. I have to remind myself that is not the same. I want to bash her skull with a rock, but I know that I may be overreacting. Brain: IT WILL MAKE YOU SAFE! Ordo: You are not helping here, brain, shut up.

Ruusan is not an enemy, therefore Ordo can’t dispose of her (and now that would actually be a threat to his relationship with Kal). But Ruusan is not a friend either because he doesn’t like her at all. Ordo doesn’t like Ruusan but he has to tolerate her presence. Ordo has to learn how to live with people under one roof he doesn’t like.

“KAL SKIRATA IS TRAUMATIZING HIS BABYBABU CHILDREN BY SURROUNDING THEM WITH PEOPLE THAT CAUSED HARM INCLUDING RUUSAN AND OTHER MANDO TRAINERS AND-“

In real life, you have to share workspace with co-workers you don’t like. If you are living in an apartment complex, you have to tolerate your annoying neighbours without bashing their skull with a rock. Sometimes even with family members if you don’t have the means to move out from home. Technically, you can kill people you don’t like, you have two hands to do it. But morally and socially is not acceptable to solve conflicts like this. When you are part of a 10+ people team, it is inevitable that there are people you won’t get along. Most people can just shake of this with ease and don’t take it personal that someone doesn’t like them.

But a person with personality disorders feels intense feelings. There is no such thing as feeling slightly irritated by the presence of the not-liked co-worker. That person will cause us so much stress and hateful thoughts and extreme emotions, that after pro-longed exposure for these, we’ll get exhausted, overstressed, and we eventually leave the job, because we can’t handle it anymore, and with this, we risk our financial safety too with it, our health and social relationships too.

I will write about this Black & White mentality more later in the topic of Favorite Person. ^^

Black and White mentality can be the easiest way to solve our problems, dilemmas, finding the easiest answers to questions, but always keep that in mind and remember:

[mamuzzy]

Thank you. I wasn't this civilized when I expressed this.

“No good female characters in Republic Commando” AS IF.

[kats-chaotic-wonderland]

Clone Adoption Agency (Chapter 3)

Back at it again, slowly getting things rolling. If it's not clear this storyline is mostly about Kaviir and her brothers. So she's going to be heavy focused for the next few chapters as we get through Kamino up to Geonosis.

Enjoy the fluff while we have it.

//THIS IS YOUR WARNING, I HAVE MOSTLY DISREGARDED CANNON. THIS IS FOR FUN. NO I AM NOT SORRY. NO I AM NOT CHANGING IT.//

When morning rolled around Vette was awoken by the sound of someone in the kitchen. Groggy, sitting up with a stretch before she walked into the kitchen to find Kaviir.

Her daughter was doing her best to cook...well something...it seemed like even she wasn't sure what she was doing. Flour was scattered around on everything, and several egg were cracked haphazardly into a small bowl. As she did her best to flour coat a pan, her tongue sticking out in concentration, a bag of sugar was slowly tipping over towards the edge of the counter.

Vette caught the sugar then walked over and picked her daughter up, “What are you doing, goofball?”

She was dusted in a small amount of what was probably chocolate powder,"Well....I couldn't sleep. And you were asleep. And I wanted to make breakfast.....but cooking is hard, and I am too short to see over the counter." She huffed cutely.

Vette laughed openly at that remark, “You’re too good for me.” Vette smiled and wiped the girls face off with a wet towel, “Go get cleaned up, and we can make something together, okay?”

"Okay!" She grinned and wiggled down to go clean up.

Vette let her down and stared at the mess across the counter, “What was she even planning?” She chuckled to herself and saved what all she could, while cleaning up and disposing of the rest. There was a roller and some cutters on the counter. Cookies was a safe bet, but it was more of a flour water mess. Another bowl had something mixed with chocolate, she figured that was probably what the cake pan was for.

“Alright then.” Vette smiled and grabbed the rest of the ingredients they would need. She thought for a moment then grabbed some other things as well. “Let’s try this instead.”

Kaviir came back out a moment later cleaned up and poked her head over the counter.

Vette smiled and wiped her hands, “You know… if you want to see what I’m doing…” she reached under the counter and opened a cabinet as a small stool dropped out, “You can always use this."

This just made Kaviir toss her hands up in exasperation,"What! I didn't even know we had that!"

“Of course. How else would I get you to wash dishes.” She teased.

She gave her a small glare,"Touche...." Then climbed up, leaning her little hands on the counter she looked eagerly at what her mother was doing.

Vette chuckled and kissed Kaviir on the cheek, “Mommy’s little helper.” She teased.

With a giggle Kaviir wrapped her in a hug,"Yup!"

Vette stopped for a moment and held on to Kaviir. She gave her a little squeeze and smiled, “I love you, Kaviir.”

"I love you too momma." She smiled

Vette gave her one last kiss before standing back up, “So… I saw that you were trying to make cookies. But how about some sweet biscuits.”

"Okay!" She grinned and bounced excited,"Let's do it!"

Vette chuckled and went to work. After another fifteen minutes of prepping cooking, Vette pulled out a tray of pastries that smelled of chocolate, “Alright, let’s dig in.”

Kaviir waited eagerly as they cooled, once she could she snagged one and took a bite. Tippy tapping her little feet happily at the flavor.

Vette grabbed her a glass of blue milk as well, “Here, you need this too. You’re still growing.”

She wrinkled her nose,"That stuff is weird."

“It helps you grow strong bones and muscles though.” Vette chuckled, “Don’t want those boys to leave you in the dust, do you?”

"No, but that stuff tastes weird." She pouted, crossing her arms stubbornly.

“You’re not supposed to sip it, hun. You throw it back.” Vette laughed.

She wrinkled her nose again,"Ew....why."

“Because it doesn’t taste great.” Vette sighed and poured herself a glass, “It’s like a natural medicine.”

"Couldn't you just take actual medicine?" She asked

“You want to go talk to the medicinal development side of this planet of genetically obsessed weirdos?” Vette asked in a bit of a sarcastic tone.

Kaviir shook her head,"nope."

“Then drink, hun.” Vette smiled and finished her own breakfast, “and hurry, we have to get to the training room soon.”

She huffed but choked down her milk before gagging and shoving a biscuit in her mouth.

“Alright, geez. I should have you try out for holo movies after that stirring performance.” She chuckled, “Get ready to go, goober.”

She nodded and ran off to the fresher with a thumbs up.

The next few months went rather well as they went about a regular routine. Vette focused on training her boys, making sure they had a proper foundation for the next phase of their training. All the while Kaviir and Echo squad were growing closer every day.

----------

Time had passed since Vette and Kaviir had first arrived on Kamino, Kaviir had already turned eight and things were going rather well. They’re time with the clones had given them a lot to work with, and now they were meeting with two more Mandalorian instructors. Vette walked with Kaviir as they entered a small training pit waiting for them were the other two instructors. One was in sandy gold armor with a black accents. The other was in black armor with silver and purple accents. The shorter one with the golden armor removed his helmet, revealing his aged face. He smiled and walked over towards them, “Vette! Haha! It’s good to see you after all of these years.” He wrapped her into a hug and hoisted her up with surprising ease.

Vette returned the embrace and buried her head into the nape of his neck, “Kal’buir.” She smiled, “It’s great to see you too.”

The older man set her down and looked over to Kaviir, “and who’s this little one?”

Kaviir tilted her head looking up at him curiously, earning a smile from the two of them.

“Kaviir. My daughter.” Vette bumped her on the back and smiled, “Kav’ika. This is Kal Skirata. One of my mentors. You’ll not find a more loyal friend.”

"Hi!" Kaviir waved with a smile.

He let out another laugh, “A daughter? Vette! Shame on you for not telling me.” He picked the girl up and poked her nose.

“Someone was out of contact for ten years.” Vette smiled shaking her head as she settled her hands on her hips. Kaviir giggled and hugged Kal tightly

Skirata patted the girl on the head, “Yes, well, I was dealing with my own issues.”

“That’s fine. You two can have a lot of make up time.” Vette took Kaviir back and set her down, “Now then, let’s get to work.”

She looked up at all of them,"what are we doing?"

“We’re doing some special training today.” Vette spoke as three of her squads walked in. Six more squads, none of which Kaviir recognized, entered the room and stood around both Skirata and Vau.

Very stood at the head of them all and cleared her throat, she spoke loud and clear as she addressed them,“Today's training will be different for you all. You’ve each trained alongside and against your brothers. While you’ve shown improvement over the past few weeks, we need to go further. So, today, each squad will face off against another in melee combat. You will fight until you can’t pick yourselves up, and the last squad standing will move on to the next round until only a single squad is left. Is that clear?”

The boys all stood at attention and called out, “Yes, commander!” And split off into their groups.

Kaviir looked over all of the new squads curiously. Then she looked up at Vau and Kal before she looked to Vette,"I'm sitting this one out huh?"

“Yes.” Vette nodded, “This exercise is tailored specifically for the clones.”

"Boys." Kaviir corrected her.

“Yes, but not just ours, all of them.” Vette nodded. “We’re sort of testing this exercise to see if it produces viable results.”

"I get that." She nodded

“Do you?” Vette smiled at Kaviir.

"Yeah." She nodded looking up at her mother,"All three of you teach differently, so putting different styles against each other gives them a chance to better apply their training."

“Well then, let’s see what all you observe.” Vette nodded and the first groups went in.

Kaviir nodded and looked out at the arena. The first bout was between Skirata’s boys, and a squad from Vette’s group. The fighting went on for nearly five minutes before a winner was decided. Vette smiled as she watched her cadets rise victorious.

“Oya! Well done. Next, Vau… pick one of your squads, they can go up next.” Vette smiled proudly.

The man nodded slowly before barking orders to one of his squads, which made them visibly flinch. Catching their reaction Kaviir frowned as her brow furrowed. She shot Vau a small glare. He seemed to not even notice the girl as the squads entered the arena. Though they flinched at Vau, it was clear that against other cadets, they were a force to be reckoned with. Only one of his troopers seemed to be knocked out during that fight, and it was only after he was double teamed by two of Vette’s.

Vette sneered slightly, “Damn, they’re good. Very good.”

“You know how Walon teaches, are you surprised?” Kal shook his head

“Suppose I shouldn’t be.” She sighed and watched her second squad get removed.

“Okay, Kal. You’re turn to take on the monster.”

Kaviir frowned and stepped around to check on the boy who got knocked down without getting close to the ring. She could hear Vau critique their performances. “Amateur at best. Keep fighting like that and your first deployment will end with you serving as kill counts on someone’s helmet.” He shook his head, “Atin… you could at least attempt to not let them team up on you.”

“Yes, sir…” the boy nodded. When Vau turned his attention to someone else, Atin glanced and caught Kaviir's gaze. She waved, but he turned away quickly. This made Kaviir huff silently and slowly moved back to Vette.

Vette set her hand on the girls shoulder, “Thoughts so far?”

"Not nice." She mumbled looking grumpy

“Oh? Care to elaborate?” Vette knelt down next to her.

"Later." She shook her head looking at the ground, her little hands balled into fists at her sides.

Vette felt a little concerned by her daughter's sudden mood shift, but left her to her thoughts. They watched the next fight and were surprised again to see Vau’s clones lead with such an overwhelming victory. None of them had gone down that time.

“Fier’fek…” Vette cursed, “What does he do to them?”

Kaviir muttered something under her breath but none of them could catch it. She was swapping between watching the kids and tossing glares at Vau.

Vette caught on eventually and hoisted her up, “Hey, you keep making those faces, it will eventually stick like that.”

She huffed cutely and crossed her arms,"No it won't."

“It might, you never know. Then we’d have to have one of these mean scientists reconstruct it.” Vette teased and kissed the girls cheek.

She looked at her with panic,"no. I like my face." Her hands snapped up to cover her cheeks.

Vette laughed again, “You’re too cute, little one.” She pulled Kaviir close, “and don’t worry. I won’t let the space giraffes touch you.”

“The what?” Skirata nearly spat out his drink.

"Sea giraffes." Kaviir corrected matter of factly.

“Pardon me, sea giraffes.” Vette chuckled.

“Are you referring to the Kaminoans?” Kal raised an eyebrow.

“Yes… Kaviir has not taken well to their appearance.”

"They look stupid." She said bluntly

“You are definitely your mothers child.” Kal sighed. “But I don’t blame you for being disturbed by them, I’ve already had to have several chats with them regarding my special boys.”

“Special?” Vette raised an eyebrow.

“Nulls. That’s what they’ve been dubbed as. Too rash and disobedient to go through training. They tried to terminate one of the boys as they showed them to me.”

Kaviir frowned again looking incredibly upset,"They did what?"

“Now you’ve done it.” Vette sighed, “Go on. Explain.”

Kal shook his head and reached out, “Come here, little one.”

She settled into his arms and looked up at him. Concern written in her little face.

“The Kaminoans… they created these boys, but they don’t treat them the same way you or I would. They see them more as… property or… a possession."

"I've noticed." She nodded,"I don't like it. They're kids, not droids."

“You’re right.” Vette nodded, “they are, but that’s why we have to train them as hard as we do. If they stay above that threshold, we can keep them safe WITHOUT blowing up the facility and taking them with us.”

"I feel the second option would be easier." She shrugged

“It really wouldn’t be.” Vette shook her head, “Listen, Kav’ika. All that matters is that you’re doing everything you can to help these boys have a normal childhood. And you’re helping ME train them. Just keep doing that, and everything will be okay.”

"Fiiine." She sighed,"but I still think a jail break would be more efficient."

“That’s probably not a good idea either.” Skirata shook his head, “listen to your mother, little one, and keep doing your best.”

"What I think can be different from what I do." She shrugged,"I'm eight, it's not like I could do anything effective on my own."

“Don’t worry too much about it.” Kal ruffled her hair, “We’ll definitely find ways to mess with them later.”

"Agreed," then she shook her head,"....you haven't finished yet. What did they do to the boys?"

“Nothing once they were with me.” Kal stood up and watched the fight, though it was clear that Vau’s boys would win again. “The nulls, Ordo and his brother Mereel, by the time the Kaminoans had moved to grab them, they had jacked my spare blaster from my boot and had it trained on the bastard, dead center of the chest, ready to shoot. No hesitation in the boys eyes. All he cared about was defending his brothers.”

"Good." She nodded,"They're good boys."

“Indeed they are.” Kal sighed as he watched the fight close out. “Well. This pretty much gives me my answer.” Kal shook his head, “They’ve got a lot of work ahead of them.”

Kaviir nodded watching the boys, she was more focused on Vau's squads. The looks they kept giving Vau worried her. Soon, there was only one more squad left from both Vette and Vau’s side. Jurir and his brothers, against Vau’s earliest squad. They all seemed ready, save for one who looked a little uncertain.

“Five-five-seven! Get your head in the game!” Vau called out, a little more irritated than usual.

Kaviir shot him another glare, this one was blatant and they could definitely see it. Vau, again, didn’t make any mention of Kaviir.

Vette put her hand on Kaviir’s shoulder, “Udesii, ad’ika.”

The fight began and it became immediately apparent that this five five seven wasn’t as in sync with his brothers as he needed to be. Most surprising, however, was Kad, from Vette’s squad. Rather than focus on a single target, he seemed to weave between Vau’s boys and lure them all to him, leaving themselves open to strikes from Jurir, Torch and Tech. After a few moments had passed, they were all on the ground, out.

The first three of Vau’s boys sat up and sighed, knowing what they were in for whenever they got back. The last one, five-five-seven… looked like he was content to lay there and die.

This made Kaviir frown and wiggle out of Kal's arms quickly.

Vette called out, “Kaviir? Where are you going?”

Kaviir didn't say anything as she ran down to the arena and checked on all of the boys. Starting with Vau's. She looked each of them over for injuries and asked if they were alright. The boys were alright enough, a few bruises here and there, but she noticed something, there were scars that looked like they had already healed, and bruise marks that appeared to be a week or two old already. Jurir nodded to Torch as they set out to help them all up.

“Ruusan.” Vau finally removed his helmet to reveal his face. He was an older man, not much older than Skirata by any means. “Didn’t know they assigned you your own personal medic. Your numbers get beaten up that badly?”

“Can it, Vau.” She sneered, “My BOYS just made two of your squads look like aiwha bait.”

Vau glared at the beaten up cadets under his command, “At this rate, that’s about all they’re good for.” He looked back to the squad behind him, “Oya! Scorch, Sev! Help the losers up.”

Kaviir growled under her breath as she looked over the scars and bruises. Jurir and the others saw her demeanor shift to something they hadn't seen in her yet. Anger. She whipped around and glared at Vau, mumbling something in Mandoa that she had probably heard from her mother a few times, before she shook her head and looked at the boy still on the ground with a softer look. She offered him a hand,"You okay?"

“I don’t think any of us are.” He sat up without taking her hand, “You should get back to your commander, it will be easier on all of us.” The cadet known as Scorch hopped down to help five-five-seven up.

"She's my mom. Not commander." She grabbed his hand gently and looked at all of them,"Is he hurting you? Outside of your training? Please tell me. If he is, it's not okay."

They looked at each other, but Scorch was first to speak up, “Pain is what pushes us further. It shows us our breaking points, and let’s us push past them. That’s why we’re the best. Take care of your own squads, and leave the rest to us.” He helped his injured brothers up and back to Vau.

Vau, was now staring at Kaviir with a blank expression.

She turned to glare back at him, it was safe to say she wasn't going to accept whatever he was feeding his boys.

“There’s a line between tending wounds and coddling them, little one.” He spoke up, “Keep going down this path, and your empathy is going to get them killed.”

Her hands balled up into tiny fists,"And there's a difference between training and hurting!" She yelled loudly,"You're just as bad as those stupid giraffes." Her cheeks were red as she turned and ran out of the arena. She wasn't really sure where she was going, but she wasn't going to stay around and be talked down to. She ran for a while until she eventually bumped into a familiar face.

Jango turned around and seemed surprised, “Oh. Kaviir.” He noticed her posture and face and knelt down, “Hey.” He shifted into immediate father mode, “Why the tears?” wiping her cheeks gently as he picked her up.

She rubbed her cheeks, she hadn't even noticed them,"Vau...." Was all she said.

“Yeah…” Jango nodded, “He usually gets that reaction. He’s kind of an ass.”

"Definitely." She nodded

“Want to talk about it?” Jango smiled.

"Maybe...." She sniffled, rubbing her nose.

He chuckled, “Come on. I’ll message Vette that we’re going to talk.” He walked with her back to his quarters where Boba was napping. He sat Kaviir at the nook in the kitchen and grabbed something from their cryofreezer. Grabbing two bowls and two spoons he set it in front of Kaviir. “So… what all happened?”

She explained about the training and the scars and how Vau's boys were acting. Everything she thought was wrong about the entire situation. By the time she was finished she was in tears again, not sobbing, they just fell as she spoke.

Jango sighed and pulled her back into his lap, “It’s okay, this is hard, on all of us.”

"He shouldn't be such an ass." She mumbled, not even bothering to stop herself from swearing.

“No. He shouldn’t be. But some people you can’t change.” Jango sighed, “and I suppose I owe you an apology for that.”

"Why?" She asked, looking up at him confused.

“Vette told you already, didn’t she?” Jango raised an eyebrow, “I handpicked the cuy’val dar myself… including Vau.”

Her brow furrowed as she pouted,"Why him?"

“He saved my life, all of our lives… more times than I can count.” Jango shook his head, “He’s not a good father figure, by any standard, but Kaviir…” his voice sounded pained, he wanted to tell her everything would be alright. But that wasn't true,“These aren’t. The cadets… they’re…” he sighed, not sure of what else to say, “Vau will train those boys to be survivors. I get where Skirata and Vette are coming from, I do… but…”

"None of this is right." Kaviir said softly, her gaze falling down to her hands. They were clenching the hem of her shorts, Jango could feel her shaking,"They shouldn't have to do this....none of them should have to die."

“No one should HAVE to die, but war is like that.” He sighed and pat the girl on the head, “and I know it doesn’t make it better, but they also wouldn’t be alive if weren’t for this situation.”

"Still...." She pouted.

“I’m not saying everything is fine, but you do have an opportunity here, little one.” Jango smiled, “Give them what you can. Let them have some fun while they’re still kids.”

"I'm trying." She frowned,"But Vau's boys should get to be kids too. They're so scared...."

“They are… for now.” Jango nodded, “But it will pass, fear always does.”

"And what's left behind when that's all you have?" She asked looking up at him, her little eyes still brimming with tears.

“A soldier, Kaviir. You have a soldier.” He sighed tiredly. Vette had done well with this kid, she was smart. But he wondered if that was a good thing. Not knowing would probably have been better at her age. But he couldn't fix it now. Instead he popped the can open and revealed what appeared to be a run of ice cream.

She shook her head,"It's not worth it."

“Maybe not, but it’s the only option we have.”

"I'm gonna dye everything that man owns pink." She said blankly

“That would be funny, but maybe avoid the armor.” Jango smiled.

"not the metal, just the under suit." She shrugged,"Powder pigment needs heat to cling to metal."

“Maybe.” Jango chuckled and handed her a spoon.

She frowned and shook her head,"No.... should go back. I feel bad getting sweets while they're getting training."

“I think their training is done.” There was a sudden knocking on the door and Vette stepped through without waiting for Jango to answer. She looked a little roughed up, but was still on her feet.

She walked over to Kaviir and pulled her up into a tight hug,“My baby… are you okay?”

Kaviir frowned looking at the state of her,"Mom? What happened?"

“I taught Vau about why we don’t mess with Mandalorian women, that’s what.” She sighed and looked her daughter over, “Trust me, you should see the other guy.”

She looked at her mom as tears formed again,"I'm sorry...." She whimpered,"I didn't mean for you to get into a fight...."

“Baby, no.” She held Kaviir close and began to lightly bounce her up and down, “You didn’t do anything wrong. You stood up for what you thought was right, and I’m so proud of you.”

"But you got hurt..." She said softly, her little hands clinging to her mother tightly.

“Sometimes people get hurt, sweetheart. Sometimes it’s the people we care about, and you’ll always wonder if you could have done anything to help, but the truth is that there’s not a lot we can do to stop life from moving on.” Vette kissed her daughter on the cheek, “but so long as we keep pushing to do our best, that’s all that matters.”

She nodded, still looking upset,"He's gonna hurt them again isn't he?"

“Probably.” Vette sighed.

"when I get bigger, I'm going to kick his ass for everything he's doing." She huffed.

“You’ll get your chance, sweetheart, but…” she sighed, not bothering to comment on the swearing,“Come on, let’s go check on the boys.”

Kaviir nodded,"They're not upset with me are they?"

“About what?” Vette asked, “Helping them? Vau won’t punish them for something they didn’t do.”

"I don't believe that." She frowned

“Well, believe me then. Because he doesn’t.” Vette smiled.

She nodded quietly.

Vette thanked Jango for finding her. Then carried her all the way back to the barracks and set her down. Jurir and Torch came running up to her, “Hey, you okay?”

She did her best to smile and hide the fact she'd been crying,"Yeah I'm fine."

They seemed concerned at her reaction, “Is it because you didn’t get a turn?” Scorch asked sincerely.

“No, di’kutt.” Jurir slapped him on the back of the head, “It’s because of Vau, I told you he was mean.”

“Hey! I didn’t know and wanted to be sure.” Scorch pouted and rubbed his head.

Vette smiled and gathered them all around her. “Listen up, all of you.” She pulled Kaviir into her lap. Kaviir smiled at them and settled into Vette's lap. Once they all gathered around, Vette began to speak, “You all did well out there. You worked as a team and watched each other’s backs.”

“But we lost.” Tech raised his hand.

“You did, and in doing so, have learned one of the most important lessons in any endeavor. You experienced failure.” Vette began to braid Kaviir’s hair as she spoke, “There will be moments on the field when you have to ask yourself if the mission can be completed by you as you currently are. If the answer is ‘no’ then it would be better for you to fall back and regroup. I don’t want to hear about any heroic sacrifices or useless charges from any of you. It’s okay to experience failure, so long as you learn from it and better yourself to face it next time.”

All of them watched her intently as they she spoke.

“Now, with that being said. I know MANY of you have an issue with Commander Walon Vau. However, you are not to openly antagonize him or his cadets in any way. Understood? If you have an issue with him, or if he approaches you. Disengage from the situation and come find me, alright?”

This made kaviir look a bit bothered. She knew Vette wasn't just talking to the boys. Vette was, in fact, actively looking at Kaviir during that last bit. “Understood?” She reiterated.

The clones all spoke in unison, “Yes, commander.”

Kaviir nodded but didn't say anything.

“Good.” Vette finished her braid and set it over the girls shoulder, “Now. You all have worked hard, so take the rest of the evening to unwind, alright?”

The boys all smiled and went to their bunks. Vette looked back to Kaviir, “If you want to get cleaned up, I can swing you spending the night here with them.”

"Really?" She asked looking up at her,"Can I bring stuff for a pillow fort?"

“I don’t think that’s going to work too well with these types of bunks.” Vette looked up and around, “but I won’t stop you from trying, just make sure to get it all cleaned up when you’re done.”

"Yes ma'am." She nodded and hopped up to go get cleaned up. Vette smiled and went to grab some things for her while she was cleaning up.

After a few minutes kaviir was in her pajamas with a bag of games and a pile of blankets and pillows headed down the hallway to the boys barracks. Her tiny form was basically buried under the bedding as her little feet padded down the hallway, one blanket sort of trailing along the floor behind her. Several Kaminoans stopped and asked if she needed help with anything, as did some of the older clones. But each time she gave them a muffled no as she went along. Eventually she bumped into someone who swore as they fell backwards. It was the boy from earlier, five-five-seven, the one who had been scolded by Vau.

She lost her footing and tumbled on top of him in a pile of fluff as one of the blankets fluttered over the top of them,"Oops!"

The boy caught her with a decent reaction time, “Hey! You okay?”

She blinked looking at him,"Hi, yeah." She straightened herself and gave him a sheepish grin as she pulled the blanket off of them,"You okay? After earlier I mean, I didn't mean to get you in trouble."

He seemed a bit uncomfortable, “Uh, yeah… I’m fine…” he kept glancing to the sides, “and you didn’t get me in trouble.”

Her grin fell as she looked at him softly,"Hey, wanna help me with this? I'll handle any adults if they say anything."

“Umm. I don’t think that’s a good idea.” He shook his head.

"Why?" She asked and glanced around for anyone that may be making him nervous. But she couldn't see anyone in the hallway.

“If my commander sees me disobeying orders, I’ll have to start over.” He sighed.

"Start over what?" She asked furrowing her brow confused.

“My laps.” He motioned to the large circular building they were in, “I have to run the perimeter ten times.”

"Why?" She frowned.

“Just part of training.” He shrugged, “My whole squad has to do it.”

"That's really dumb." She shook her head,"what's your name?"

“RC 01-0557.” He stated rather quickly.

"Name, not number." She shook her head

“Oh. I don’t have one.” He replied with a shrug.

"Oh. Do you want one?" She offered genuinely.

He was a bit taken back and confused by her forwardness. “Ummm… I was actually waiting for my squad to give me one. Or my commnader.”

"Fair enough." She nodded, now feeling very awkward,"Sorry. Didn't mean to be pushy."

“It’s okay. Thanks for the offer though. What’s your name?”

"Kaviir." She smiled softly.

“Nice to meet you, Kaviir.” He stood back up and looked around, “I really need to get back to my training.”

She nodded and started gathering her stuff,"Yeah, sorry. If you need anything let me know okay."

“O-okay.” He nodded and started his jog back up.

After she gathered her stuff and made her way to her squad's barracks. When she arrived Jurir and Tech seemed to be talking about something when she walked in. They both looked at her and smiled. Torch ran up to her and looked over the blankets, “Whoa! Where did you get all of these from?”

"My room." She said muffled through the blankets,"We're gonna have a fun night."

“Did Commander Ruusan get these for you?” Torch continued to pester her.

“What can we do to set up?” Jurir smiled.

"Well they're blankets, you get them when you stay somewhere...." She handed him a blanket and some pillows,"We're gonna make a big soft pile in the middle of the room okay? It makes a good spot to spend time together."

“Okay.” They nodded and began to set blankets and pillows where they thought it would be comfortable. Once everyone was settled Kaviir plopped herself down and pulled up her bag,"I brought games."

The boys all looked to each other and then to Kaviir with smiles on their faces. She passed out the devices and let everyone pair up to play. The next few hours were spent with the boys silently laughing and playing together. Jurir looked over to Kaviir and smiled, “Hey, what’s that thing that the commander keeps calling you?”

She looked at him confused,"What thing?"

“A-ad’ika?” Jurir searched his head, “I think that’s how it goes.”

"Oh," she perked up as she realized what he meant,"Kav'ika is what she calls me, Ad'ika is like.... it's something Mandolorians call their kids." She realized she really didn't know how to explain it,"She's always called me that."

“Mandalorian?” They seemed kind of confused.

She paused and looked at them all,"Yeah, that's what Mama is....and Jango...Kal...Vau even though he's shitty at it. They're all Mandolorians."

“What’s that?” Torch tilted his head to the side. Kaviir did her best to explain everything her mom had taught her about Mandolorians. Everything she knew about the culture, the planet, all of it.

“So we’re going to be incredible warriors too once we’re done training?” Kad smiled.

"That's the plan."she nodded with a smile.

“Wait… so what do we call ourselves?” Jurir looked around at his brothers.

"Well..." She paused thinking for a moment,"probably Ner'vod. It means brother."

“Ner’vod.” The boys practiced saying it over and over again. Kaviir smiled softly watching them.

“Hey…” Jurir thought for a moment, “Does this make you ner’vod as well?”

She blinked for a moment,"Well, if you guys want me to be I guess. I'd adopt you all."

“Wouldn’t we be adopting you?” Tech asked, “There’s more of us.”

"Yeah but I'm older." She shrugged

“So?” They all asked in unison.

"That means I get to adopt all of you." She said sticking her tongue out at them.

“But all of our ages together make us older than you.” Torch added with a grin.

"That's not how that works." She shook her head

“Who put you in charge?” Kad huffed.

"Mom." She shrugged,"I'm the big sister."

“Awwww.” They all sighed in unison.

"What?" She giggled

“We wanted to be the ones to adopt you and Commander Ruusan.”

"Fiiine." She relented,"You can adopt us."

“Nono. Rules are rules.” Jurir sighed.

"I mean, this just means you're all part of our clan." She shrugged.

“Clan? What’s that? Like battalion?” Kad scooted closer.

"It's a family." She explained the concept as best she could, how Kal adopted her mom, and her mom adopted her.

“Oh! Like pods brothers!” Torch exclaimed.

"Kinda, yeah." She nodded

They all nodded towards each other and looked back to Kaviir. “So we’re all family now. So what do we do?” tech asked.

"Well, Mom usually hugs and tickles me." She shrugged,"But that may be too silly for you boys."

“Yeah…” Jurir smiled, “Hey! Let’s play hide and seek!”

"Sure." She grinned excitedly.

“Right then. Who wants to go first?” Jurir looked around.

"I'll seek." Kaviir shrugged,"I'm pretty good."

“Maybe you can actually find Kad.” Jurir joked, “None of us have ever been able to find him.”

"Challenge accepted." She grinned

“You’re on.” Kad grinned and threw a blanket over Kaviir.

She threw the blanket off,"Hey!" She giggled

They had all vanished without a sound. With a smile she started looking around, starting with the bunks and any storage areas. Checking the entire room, no one was there to be seen. She narrowed her eyes and started checking vents and any other nooks she could find, but still nothing. As she searched she realized they hadn't set any boundaries. That was probably a mistake. Soon she realized wherever they were, they weren’t in the bunk anymore. Next she pulled on her boots and poked her head out into the hallway. It was empty, but a stray pillow lining the corridor that Torch had been holding gave her a clue she was on the right track.

She narrowed her eyes and looked in the other direction for a moment. Nothing was there, at least not anymore. Taking a chance she went in the opposite direction from the pillow and began searching. There were a few signs that the boys had been there. Further trails led towards the training area and the mess hall. Veering off towards the training room she ducked around a few corners, careful to not be spotted.

The training room was mostly empty, but as she listened closely, heard a sound coming from somewhere. The sound was coming from above her in the rafters. Looking up she found Tech was doing his best to remain silent.

"Tech!" She whispered,"I found you!"

“Yeah yeah…” he sighed and hopped down from the rafters.

She ruffled his hair,"Next time."

He smiled and returned to the bunk room. Back tracking she headed for the mess hall. The mess hall was seemingly empty, but with its size, it needed further investigation. She spent a while looking around and under every table and trash bin. Eventually she found a young Torch hiding underneath a table.

"Found you." She whispered with a grin,"Nice try with the pillow."

“Thanks.” He smiled rather proud of himself.

Kaviir backtracked to the hallway. The hallway had been seemingly cleared of all traces. She pursed her lips and went back to the barracks. The barracks were empty save Torch and Tech who were now passed out on the pile of blankets. She smiled at them and then turned to start wandering the halls looking for any of Jurir and Kad. The only two paths that led down the other end of the hallway were out towards the outer perimeter where it was currently pouring rain, or to the class area. Taking a chance she headed for the classroom first.

The class area was filled with row after row of solid desks. She started looking around each desk, eventually she found Jurir underneath one of the desks, “Darn, I thought I had it this time.” he smirked

"Next time bud." She giggled and fluffed his hair

“Yeah yeah… who do you have left?” He fixed his hair

"Kad." She shrugged

“Oh, have fun with that.” He smiled and made his way back towards the barracks.

She shook her head and headed out towards the perimeter. The perimeter seemed to be empty, unsurprising considering how heavy it was raining. That was until she noticed a familiar boy was wandering the area, not really noticing Kaviir. She furrowed her brow and went over to him. He still didn’t notice her as she came up beside him. She gently tapped his shoulder.

The boy spun around to face her, it wasn’t Kad, but five-five-seven, from before. He sighed as his demeanor changed, “Oh, it’s you.”

She frowned and pulled him out of the rain,"What are you doing out here?"

“Oh, I heard something, and wanted to make sure we weren’t under attack.” He was obviously lying.

She narrowed her eyes at him,"You're a bad liar."

“I’m not lying.” He looked around, probably for an exit.

"If you run I'll just chase you." She said, crossing her arms,"And I'm faster than you."

“I uh… really don’t think you are.” He darted around and took off down the platform.

She rolled her eyes and darted after him. In a moment she was running beside him,"Come on really?"

“Just leave me alone!” He called out through the storm.

"Look, I'm sorry for getting you in trouble." She called following him,"But you shouldn't be out in the rain."

“I’m fine.” He slipped to the right and down a staircase.

She followed him and as they reached the bottom she slipped and toppled forward knocking into him. They rolled, once they stopped she ended up on top of him. Sitting up she sat cross legged on his stomach and rubbed her head,"Ow...." she looked down and blinked as she realized what she was sitting on,"Sorry...."

Kaviir suddenly found a fist hitting her hard in the jaw. The boy's eyes dilated as he shoved her off of him. He took a readied stance. The lightning flashed and she could see all of the scars on his arms and neck. He was in a fight or flight mode at this point.

Rubbing her jaw she looked up at him,"Ow, I'm not Vau di'kutt! I'm not going to hit you. Jeez. I slipped." She hopped up and fixed her pajamas,"Also you punch like a girl."

He shook his head and sighed, “Just go away! I don’t want to be your friend!”

"Why." She asked, crossing her arms and giving him a look. Hearing that from him hurt, he reminded her of her brothers. But he was his own person. And she was determined to help him, even if he hated her for it.

“That’s none of your business.” He mumbled. He walked past her and hid his face, “Just… leave me alone, please.”

"I don't care if it's not my business," She growled and grabbed his arm firmly, but not painfully as he passed. She turned him to face her and looked at him closer. Her grasp on him was firm enough he couldn't just pull away.

“Why do you care?” He refused to look at her.

She turned his face to look at her,"Because, you didn't get a choice in this. And you shouldn't be hurt worse just for taking time to learn." Her eyes were set as she looked him over,"What did he do to you?"

“Nothing… it’s not Commander Vau.” He shrugged her off and started to walk away.

She held onto his arm holding him in place,"Who was it then?"

“It’s the Kaminoans.” Vau’s voice called from the top of the stairs. His helmet was off and he was staring at her with tired eyes, “I’m sure you’re mother tried to keep it from you, but you’ve got to find out anyway. The Kaminoans only provide the best in terms of ‘product’. Anything below their standards gets cut.”

The cadet pushed Kaviir’s arm off and went to stand next to Vau. The older man continued to talk, “We’re not here to give these kids a childhood, it’s too late for that, it’s in their genetic coding. I’m here to keep them alive, and the best way to do that is to keep them as far above that line as possible. So keep shooting your glares at me, little one, all you’re doing is confirming that I’m doing my job.”

She did indeed shoot him another glare,"They age faster than anyone else. In a year they won't get the chance for a childhood!" She yelled angrily,"Giving them a few days now isn't going to drop them."

“In the real world, you might be right.” Vau donned his helmet, “but Kamino is a whole other world.” He looked to the cadet, “Get back to your bunk five-five-seven. We’ll continue in the morning, without interruptions.”

"Continue what?" Kaviir asked crossing her arms

“His training. What else?” Vau spun to leave, “I suggest you get back to your ‘pillow fort’ little one. Your ner’vod are waiting for you.”

"You're an ass." Kaviir spat at him as she walked away. She huffed and went back to the barracks, red in the face and soaked to the bone. Jurir and the boys, including Kad, were waiting for her. They all ran up to her and immediately seeing the state she was in.

“Hey? Are you okay?” Jurir frowned

She squeezed the water out of her hair,"I'm going to become the biggest thorn in that asshole's boot." She grumbled and plopped on the floor to pour some water out of her shoe.

“What happened?” Jurir asked while handing her multiple towels.

She grabbed one and aggressively dried her hair,"Vau.... being....an....ass...." She said between shakes. Her hair was a mess when she pulled off the towel. "I really hate him." She growled and started drying her clothes. She sniffled and rubbed her nose,"Asshole."

“Asshole?” Torch tilted his head, “What’s that mean?”

She paused and looked at them,"Uh... it's a bad word for people who are mean.... maybe don't say it around mom."

“But how is it a bad word if you only use it on mean people?” He scratched his head.

"That..." She paused for a moment looking just as confused,"...is an excellent question. Mom never explained that."

“Point is…” Jurir moved next to Kaviir to try to help her out, “Don’t use it, okay?”

The others looked at each other and nodded.

"Seriously though," she sniffled again,"Vau sucks."

“True.” Kad nodded, “but you can’t argue, his cadets do best us most of the time.”

"Doesn't matter when he treats them like droids." She huffed,"What's the point in survival when there's nothing left of you to live. They can't have fun, I've never seen them smile. It's irritating."

Kad thought for a moment, “I don’t know.” He shrugged, “Just making a point.”

"Sorry." She sighed,"He gets under my skin." Then she sniffled again followed by a sneeze, she wiped her nose,"Ugh...."

“What’s wrong?” Jurir looked up to her.

"caught a cold from the rain." She groaned,"Vau is a jerk. He had that poor kid out in the rain doing who knows what."

Jurir pat her on the shoulder, “Come on, we need to get you dried off and under the covers.”

"Mom has all my clean clothes." She sighed

“Well then let’s go see the commander.” Jurir smiled.

She nodded and hopped up, wobbling a little.

Jurir and the squad helped her back to Vette’s quarters. She was in the middle of brewing something warm and smelling of cinnamon. But when the door opened to show her sopping wet daughter and four confused cadets, she immediately rushed over to Kaviir and pressed her hand to the girls forehead, “What happened? Why are you soaking wet?”

"Weeelll......" She started and explained everything about the game and finding the cadet outside. "I really don't like Vau.'

Vette sat Kaviir on her lap and was rubbing her temple with an expression that read, ‘This is going to be the next ten years of my life, isn’t it?’

“Kav’ika… please… I know you don’t like Vau, I get it.”

"He's a jerk." She crossed her arms and sniffled again.

Vette was ready to give Kaviir a lecture, but couldn’t stand to be upset with her daughter sniffling and shivering in her arms. She sighed wrapped her daughter up, “Come on, let’s get you into a warm bath.”

"Sorry." She whispered as they went into the bathroom,"I just couldn't do nothing while he was out in the cold...."

“Mi ad’ika.” Vette kissed her forehead as she drew the girl a bath, “Don’t ever apologize for wanting to help people, but you need to learn that there’s a time and place.” She smiled.

"And a small child in the rain isn't?" She asked

“It usually is, but you had no idea Vau was there, what if he had jumped you? You could have gotten hurt?” Vette sounded rather concerned about all of this.

"I wouldn't put it past him to." She huffed then sneezed,"He looked so scared."

“Kaviir… there’s something you need to know, I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want you to worry about them, but, it’s time you know the truth.”

She frowned,"...I already worry. How much worse could it get."

“Kaviir… if the boys don’t maintain a good enough standing. They’ll be taken and… terminated.” Vette sighed, “I read up on that one from Vau’s squad. He’s got a stunted growth. The Kaminoans already want to terminate him, but Vau is at least giving the kid a chance.” She began to wash the girls hair, “I know that doesn’t make up for anything, and your right, Vau is NOT a kind man, but please… let him get that boy past the line before you start doing anything.”

She didn't say anything, but Vette heard small drops hitting the water.

“Shhh.” Vette washed her hands off before turning the girl around and wiping her tears, “It’s okay. Nothing will happen to them.”

"That's why he's mad at me...." She sobbed,"....I didn't know...."

“No no.” Vette pulled the girl in, soaking wet and all and kissed her forehead, “He’s not mad at you, he just needs to focus.”

"No...mom he's mad at me." She sobbed

“Why do you say that?” She sounded concerned.

"He doesn't want to be around me." She whimpered

“It’s okay, baby.” She finished cleaning her off and toweled her down, “Sometimes people say things they don’t really mean when they’re stressed out. You can’t always focus on what you mean when you're in weird situations.”

She nodded silently and wiped her eyes,"Can I still stay with the boys tonight?"

“How about… we let the boys stay here, eh?” She ruffled the girls hair and cheeks and began to pepper her with kisses, “But only if we can get a big smile, okay?”

She giggled and smiled as she wiped her cheeks,"Okay okay!"

“I don’t know, that doesn’t seem good enough. You could just be faking it.” Vette laughed again and began to poke Kaviir.

She wiggled and whined,"Mooom!"

“Alright.” She smiled, “Well, thanks to my magical mom powers. I already knew you’re request, and had the boys go grab all the blankets while you were getting cleaned up. So they’re already waiting. Now get your pajamas on, okay?“

"Kay!" She nodded and went to get dressed

Vette leaned against the doorway and waited for her. Once she was decent and dried off. She opened the fresher room and watched the boys all tackle Kaviir into a dogpile.

She giggled and hugged them all,"Well hi."

“We were told this might help.” Jurir mumbled from underneath his brothers.

"It does." She smiled and squeezed them all tight

“Alright, you all.” Vette smiled, “Time for bed.” She clapped her hands

"Not," she sneezed,"...yet..." Then she pouted,"...okay maybe..."

“This isn’t a vote, Kav’ika.” She smiled, “Go to bed.”

The boys all nestled into their blankets and began calling out to each other, “Good night, ner’vod.”

This made Vette pause for a moment as she listened. She began to lightly tremble as she turned around for a brief moment, her eyes were watery as she smiled towards all of them. “Jante nuhoy, mhi ak’ikas.” She smiled before returning to her room.

Kaviir sat up once she was gone and motioned them all to scoot closer. By the time Vette came in in the morning, they were all curled up cuddling in one big pile of blankets.

Chapter 2

Chapter 4

Star Wars Master Post

Clone Adoption Agency Navigation

[hawthornsword]

help i want to hear about like... all your wips. but if i have to choose a couple to ask about, tell me a little about loyalty as a love language, the last daughters of house mereel, boba/ahsoka variations, cody reconditioned during rako hardeen, and/or stewjoni knitting au??

Hoo boy, I am happy to share about all of these, so this is gonna be long.

The Last Daughters of House Mereel.

This is an alternate universe where Kal Skirata, Walon Vau, and Mij Gilamar were with Jango's Haat Mando'ade before Galidraan. (Please note I have not finished reading the Republic Commando books and these fellas will likely not be written even remotely in character.) Galidraan happened the same, but these three didn't die because they weren't there. Where were they?

Well, Kal's daughter Ruusan ran away from her mom's home because she wants to be a Mando warrior like dad, so he had to take her and go talk to her mom about custody stuff.

Walon meanwhile was in love with that princess on his home planet who had beem imprisoned in some fanatical religious cult's monastery. I decided they had a kid too, and when Walon discovered this, he goes home to try again to rescue his princess and their kid. Sadly he does not rescue his love, but he does get his little girl Mitzli.

And finally we have Mij. Mij married a Mandalorian woman named Tani and then she was murdered at some point. He vowed vengeance. And he absolutely hates Priest and Reau and Death Watch. So I'm saying they had two daughters, Peyton and Jonah, before Tani was murdered by Death Watch. I've decided she was a Viszla, but a True Mandalorian that hated Death Watch. And Peyton is born Force Sensitive. Tani thought this was a sign that they could return to the glory days of Tarre Viszla, the Mandalorian Jedi, healing the rift between their peoples, and wanted to send Peyton to the Jedi temple to be trained. The Death Watch Viszlas hated Tani since she left them for the Haat Mando'ade. Mij promised Tani as she died that he'd send Peyton to the Jedi, however, he didn't actually want to so when he takes her, he explains that it was her mother's wish not his, and he wants yearly visits to check on her and to call her. He also doesn't mention the fact they're Mandalorian. So Peyton does get raised as both Mando and Jedi, but she and her dad and sister are the only ones who know it. When Galidraan happens, Mij is gone on one of his yearly visits.

So when Jango gets around to recruiting the the three men to Kamino, they bring their daughters. They're contractually obligated to keep their work secret, and the girls live in a different area so theoretically they shouldn't ever find out what's going on. Even when Kal adopts the nulls, according to the Kaminoans they're supposed to stay with the other clones and simply be trained by Kal.

So when the girls get to Kamino their ages range from 17 to 11. Boba is 2, and they babysit.

Now Peyton was supposed to be with the Jedi, right? Well, Mij asked her what she wanted to do and the Force guided her to go to Kamino too, so she hasn't quit but she's essentially told the Jedi she needed extended leave of absence. (Remember Jango and the others still don't know she's a Jedi padawan.)

It doesn't take the girls long to sneak around Kamino and discover what shady business uncle Jango has been up to, and they do not like it. So they decide they're going to try to fix it all.

Ruusaan grows up to be a scary badass warrior, Mitzli is an electrical engineer, Jonah is a doctor, and Peyton does digital forensics (she's a hacker but she gotta have a day job.) These will all be conveniently plot relevant jobs.

There's going to be a very comedic reveal at some point when Jango realizes Peyton is a Jedi, when the Jedi realize Peyton is a Mandalorian, and when all the dads realize they had terrible opsec for that decade on Kamino because their kids have been undermining the war since they were teenagers.

And finally, where this story all initially started, and where it will probably eventually end, was the Corrie Guard Commanders trying to convince Fox to take a night off and get him laid. Which leads to him meeting this charming and mysterious girl Peyton at 79s.

---

Boba/Ahsoka variations Essentially I keep having a ton of different ideas of Boba and Ahsoka time traveling back from during the imperial/rebellion era to when they were kids/teens to try to fix things. Sometimes it's on accident, sometimes it's on purpose. Usually they go back to during the development of the clones, but once it's all the way back to Galidraan. Sometimes they're friends, sometimes they were still enemies, in the middle of a fight, Boba trying to collect the bounty on Ahsoka. Sometimes, they say that's why they're fighting but it's actually more complicated than that - in that officially speaking that's still the case, but at some point they hooked up and Boba is still pissed because he thought it was more but turns out she's still hung up on Rex.

Sometimes the whole thing takes place from Jango's perspective and he's awkwardly watching his ten year old have a lover's quarrel with this 14 year old togruta who just appeared from nowhere, which makes it more believable but no kess awful when your kid tells you he's a time traveler.

I haven't decided which version I like best yet.

---

Cody reconditioned during the Rako Hardeen arc

This one was actually @eclipsesilverwolf's idea but she said it was too sad for her to write so I promised to do it for her.

Essentially Cody and Obi-Wan were already deeply in love when the Rako Hardeen arc happened, and Cody is absolutely fucked up with grief. Like he's non-functional. (Which, probably would never happen honestly, because it's Cody, who does his duty just like Obi-Wan, but just go with it for the sake of the drama.) Whatever natborn or Jedi is in charge of the 212th while Obi-Wan is gone (dare I change the timeline and say Krell?) finds this unacceptable and sends Cody to be reconditioned.

So when Obi-Wan comes home, it's to a Cody who doesn't remember him at all. Obi-Wan is furious, of course. Poor Cody is just confused as to why the new guy is so friendly and sad and sometimes reaches out to touch him like they're close. Hebhas to go on his brothers telling him about hiw things used to be, but even theu didn't know the extent of the relationship, and now they've beek under Krell's leadership, so Cody is so unsure of this Kenobi guy. So they're having to learn each other all over again and navigate this newly unbalanced relationship. Obi-Wan offers to use the Force to help Cody remember, but he doesn't trust Obi-Wan anymore, so he says no.

There are several more severely angsty plot things I may have happen before it all resolves, but it will have an eventual happy; I'm incapable of doing otherwise.

---

Stewjoni Knitting au

This was inspired by a discord conversation about Waxer/Boil Month prompts, but this ended up being more Codywan than Waxer/Boil. We'll see if I can get enough of it done in time to give W/B their own separate part.

The Separatists shoot down the 212th and the venator crashes on Stewjon. Stewjon is independent, not Republic, and isolationist. They refuse to contact the Republic, but as soon as they realize Obi-Wan is one of them they're super friendly otherwise. They say they'll repair the venator if the 212th helps them throw the Separatists off their planet first.

Obi-Wan's family is actually contacted and immediately comes to meet him. (They proudly gave him to the Jedi knowing he'd be happy and well cared for with them, and also gave the Jedi their contact info. If Obi-Wan ever needed it or wanted to come home he was welcome.

Now, Obi-Wan knew something of his birth culture but it was mostly secondhand knowledge through reading in the temple archives. It isn't a complete cultural education. One thing he's picked up though is knitting. It's meditative and provides something to always do with his hands, much like Anakin's tinkering. He pretty much always has his knitting with him. And he knows his clan colors and patterns. Actually that's why the 212th is that color - its Obi-Wan's color. Obi-Wan gifts pretty much everything he makes to people. There are near-strangers and acquaintances and dearest friends throughout the galaxy with Obi-Wan's knitting. He lets the Force guide him on what yarns and patterns to use and what to gift to who when, but he almost always uses yarn he imports directly from Stewjon. It's rare and highly prized for it's beautiful metallic sheen, and only a small amount is exported. Stewjoni citizens away from home get first dibs on the exports.

This yarn not only looks metallic but actually is. The sheep on stewjon developed armored wool to protect against a certain predator. Once spun up and knit or felted, it works as a pretty decent armored garment too. Cody keeps trying to get Obi-Wan into armor. Obi-Wan insists he doesn't need it, but never bothers to explain why. He and Cody get into a situation where Cody's armor gets badly damaged and Obi-Wan gives him a piece of his clothing and finally explains its armored nature. He never takes it back, and Cody continues to wear it under his armor. Obi-Wan likes knowing he's helping keep Cody safe, even when he's not beside him.

Many members of the 212th have been gifted knit items by the time they crash on Stewjon.

When Obi-Wan's family meets the 212th, they are delighted by all the new members of their family. Obi-Wan is confused. The family asks why he's confused. He asks what they mean by family. They explain that the 212th wearing Kenobi colors/patterns means they're family by Stewjoni standards, and they thought Obi-Wan had been marrying/adopting all these troopers. Obi-Wan explains he didn't know that's what the cultural significance was, and they say that's fine, they're still happy to have them anyway. They say it still counts as legal on Stewjon whether Obi-Wan knew it or not.

Now, since they've accepted the clones into the Kenobi clan, and they find out their whole situation, they immediately are against the Republic for illegally enslaving citizens of Stewjon.

Meanwhile, Cody and Obi-Wan are a little bit freaking out about the fact that giving Stewjoni knitting is basically equivalent of Mandalorian armor exchanges of betrothal. They found out separately from one another, so Obi-Wan determines that this is fine, Cody has his heart it's true, but Obi-Wan will never say anything because he's committed to the Jedi. It's just a private love he'll carry in his heart. It's fine. Cody however, assuming that Obi-Wan knew exactly what he was doing when he gave him the armorweave, decides he must give Obi-Wan something in return which leads to a whole subplot about getting beskar armor.

Meanwhile, Boil is learning to knit in the background so he can give something to Waxer, and Waxer is communing with the beasts and has probably decided he wants to he a sheep farmer.

[izzyovercoffee]

And after all this, the story STILL rewards Kal by sending Ruusaan back to him to seamlessly fall into Mando culture. I grew up in a situation a little bit similar to this, and no matter her ups and downs with her mother, or her life experiences, I seriously doubt Ruu would be able to become a Mando so quickly, or would even WANT to be one, especially since she was raised Corellian, so much different than Mandalorian ways of life.

HONESTLY

It’s just … frustrating, I guess, to read the republic commando novels and not have the narrative really be honest with the damaging behavior that Kal tends to engage in and inflict on anyone around him. and, tbh, the narrative coherency, and the thematic arcs that should span all the novels, suffer dramatically as a result.

The Corellian thing I can overlook bc the other Coruscanti characters are also there, alongside mando-mandos who are shown a willingness to befriend and support to help them adjust (vs Ilippi who was entirely alone) so Ruusan, at least, would be (and is) in good hands (unlike Ilippi … that poor woman).

but also wrt the way the novels present her obviously going back to Kal. It’s just kind of … not great.

I mean, Ruusan as a character has a lot of really interesting nuanced moments. She clearly is seeking for a connection with her estranged father — though I can’t imagine why that is. But part of the reason I can’t imagine why is because we don’t really receive an answer to that question. It’s presented as a “Of COURSE she does” but … for anyone who looks deeper under the surface than what the novels present to us, there’s still that question of why.

I can understand it on the level of “distant father was presented as some kind of heroic warrior” and that Ilippi, despite leaving him, did not want to paint him as a villain to them. After all, he was still their father, and he still supported them financially, if not in any other way. I can kind of understand the motivation in wanting to reconnect, especially after losing her mother …

But like, it becomes abundantly clear that had Ruusan not been “in trouble,” had she not been missing, Kal would never have even thought about her.

Kal had everything in plan, in place, to disappear — again. Without telling the one child that didn’t divorce him.

And something about that … just feels wrong to me. He notes that she’s the one out of the three who didn’t declare dar’buir, yet he never tries to reach out to her? He was entirely willing to disappear with his new family, without trying to even have a single conversation with her?

Like … it’s easy to handwave it as a narrative inconsistency or an oversight, but this isn’t a solo detail with Kal. He does this kind of thing repeatedly with other characters, too. He dismisses other characters outright, he withholds affection, he controls the flow of information — to the point that others suffer, and even die, because nothing happens that doesn’t get his okay first.

And somehow … she’s lucky that she landed in some deep shit, because she wouldn’t have had the opportunity to reconnect with him otherwise. And it’s never really addressed that he never really planned on having her in his life. Luck put her in his path and he scooped her up along the way, and we’re supposed to see this as an act of benevolence — but why did her life have to be on the line before he cared about her?

[oldtestleper]

thesummerstorms replied to your post: izzyovercoffee: @variative: #also imo it really helps explain why...

here's to Ruu realizing what's going on before things go too far south and getting the fuck out of there to live in a happy poly relationship with Corr and Jilka somewhere they all feel happy, respected, and engaged

g o d yes!!! thank you honestly!!!

[cienie-isengardu]

My RepCom Musing: Arla Fett and Death Watch

or: what the IC:501st could (should) give us but didn’t.

One of my biggest problems with the Republic Commando book series is the lack of presenting different point of views in regard to groups the main heroes (or more precisely, main Mandalorian ex-training sergeants) disliked or outright hated. Obviously, the Jedi Order was an usual target for critique with little counter-arguments, especially from Jedi characters themselves. And yes, Etain and Jusik Bardan had right to feel negative about it too, although I will not lie, there is something concerning how Jusik couldn’t stay in Order due to disagreement of its politics and use of clones but threw away any regard for law or morality that was so important to him in the first place (the reason for quitting) to be one of Skirata’s boys. 

Like the Jedi, Death Watch did not get a fair chance to present its values or actual similarity to generally presented mandalorian society. The Hard Contact had Ghez Hokan, the alleged member of said organization, said to be so brutal he was kicked out from Death Watch itself but who was both competent soldier and interestingly our first source of informations about Mandalorians before Kal Skirata and Walon Vau entered the series for good. Especially in regard to admiration for Jango Fett (who presumably should be his enemy). But of course, then came Order 66 and for whatever reason Hokan’s allegiance was retconned. Instead the Death Watch was represented by Dred Priest, who was described as a man that ran a fighting club on Kamino because of which clone trainees got seriously injured and some died(?). Vau was also presented as a sergeant who brutalized his commandos (and was the boogeyman to some characters in second book), but I guess it is more forgiven since Vau did it to “raise survivors” and through the storyline we could see him soften somehow toward his - and Kal’s - boys, while Dred was allowing the fighting for… his own amusement? Or at least, Mij drew such a picture, since Dred showed up and spoke for what? A one chapter overall just to be killed?

Then we have his girlfriend, Isabet Reau, who is known for speaking about Mandalorians returning to times of their glory. Like her boyfriend, Dred, most things we know about her comes from Mij who hated both with passion but they did not get any special focus as real characters. Ironically, Kal Skirata talked or thought about how Mandalorians should reunite and become one strong nation. So spoke also his biological daughter, Ruusan (“Don’t you think it’s time we started fighting for our own interests?” Ruu took the mug out of her father’s hand and peered into it as if checking up on him. “I’m not saying this guy’s right, but being at every aruetii’s beck and call and doing the dying for them doesn’t sound smart to me. Look at this world. It’s dirt-poor. That’s not much to show for the lives we’ve spent on shoring up other governments.”) and apparently this sentiment run deep enough in the family that Venku “Kad” Skirata at some point became the leader of a political faction who wanted to see a resurgence of the Mandalorian people (and even demands it from Mandalore Boba Fett). And by this also means making Mandalore strong in political and economic sense. So maybe not really a return to the Mandalorian Empire but for sure closer to it than farther since both visions demand from Mandalorians to have a solid economy like own production of weapons and food and standing army.

We have also Arla Fett, who was taken by Death Watch warriors who killed her family at Concord Dawn and at some point, presumably due to Mandalorian Stockholm Syndrome, became one of them, only to end in hospital for the mentally ill, from where she was abducted by clan Skirata and if IC would sequel, her memory would be wiped out on her wish and Arla would married her captor (Jusik).

And here is a thing: by using Death Watch as only boogeyman to main characters, we don’t only lost a chance to actually explore the complex nature of mandalorian society from different perspective but also, by examining the similarity between the “good” and “bad” Mandalorians we actually could have a solid critique of them all as a contrast to the overwhelming glorification of Skirata growing with each book. Even more! This could create a possibility for Kal to see his own - or in general, mandalorian culture’s - faults mirrored in action by Death Watch (taking in Arla) and maybe finally get some understanding of his own traumas, especially related to how he was trained by Muunin Skirata.

(There is something ironic that Jango and Arla Fett, though separated and taken by opposite sides of conflict, were allowed to keep their names and connection to their biological family. Jango didn’t need to take Jaster Mereel’s surname to be treated as son and apparently Death Watch did not keep Arla in the dark about the fact her younger brother survived. Meanwhile Kal Skirata’s “adoption” started with Muunin - intentionally or not -  erasing his identity by taking away his name and giving new, despite the boy's protest. 

"You can do all kinds of things when you're wearing armor that ordinary folks can't do, Kal."

Munin called him Kal. In the man's own language, it had something to do with knives and stabbing. Munin had nicknamed him Kal because Falin had tried to stab him with the three-sided knife when they first met; the Mandalorian seemed to think it was funny, and hadn't been angry at all. But Munin fed him, and didn't hurt him, and in the weeks since Falin had been part of the mercenary camp, he'd felt better even if he wasn't happy.

Sometimes Munin called him Kal'ika. The mercenaries told him it meant "little blade," and showed that Munin was fond of him.

"I'm Falin," he said at last. "My name's Falin." But he was already forgetting who Falin was. His home in Kuat City seemed like a dream mostly forgotten when he woke up, more a feeling than a memory. His family had moved to Surcaris while his father did engineering stuff on the new KDY warships there. "I don't want another name."

Munin ate with him. When he wasn't shouting, he was actually a kind man, but he could never take Papa's place. "Starting over can be a good thing, Kal'ika. You can't change the past or other folks, but you can always change yourself, and that changes your future." [Order 66]

And what kid wouldn’t finally gave up after a year or so of such treatment? And yes, Munin comforted him and was kind, unless he was pushing 7 years old past the boy’s limits and insults to the point other Mandalorian asked if he was trying to kill the kid. And somehow, somehow Vau brutality always set Kal in the wrong way and not for the first time I wonder how much it was just Skirata’s empathy toward clones and how much his own trauma?)

And here comes the main point of my thesis. Arla Fett’s subplot had one of the greatest potential to explore but sadly, the opportunity, as with most subplots in regard to female characters, was brutally dumped. Because we could see the parallels between her and Jango by learning more about her life under (presumably) Tor Vizsla’s leadership or we could have an actual storyline dealing with survivor of traumatic events coming with terms with what happened (instead of the easy solution of “wipe out memory with Force” and marry her to another male character, when so many heroes of the story assumed she was repeadly raped and/or brutalized). Or actually make Arla Fett the die-hard Death Watch member who wanted to return to the only family she knew and had at this point in life. But above everything else, we could explore the parallels between Arla’s introduction to Death Watch AND Kal Skirata’s introduction into mandalorian life and maybe, just maybe finally got more objective view of Mandalorian culture, when people attempt murder or kill ‘cause they hate each other’s guts and there is no one out there to control it since everything revolve around “the law of stronger (clan)”, or how they take orphaned kids into their clans and don’t ask if said kids even want to be Mandalorians themselves (or, as Kal did to his biological sons, decided to make them soldiers at age of 8), they just put them for long-termed “assimilation” and even brutal training to the point Mandalorian Stockholm Syndrome kicks on good. How they don’t mind killing people for money or for their own (political?) goals. 

Because Death Watch and True Mandalorian may have different goals and approach to what they are and should be, but ultimately, they all came from the same culture and were shaped by the same traditions, faith, mindset. Going on how Death Watch are the worst scum but not presenting much to support this claim (as in, letting us see their POV instead of forcing us to rely solely what main heroes think) while praising Kal and his clan for doing similar stuff, just for “good reason” makes the overtone of the Mandalorian culture, the glorification so… hypocritical.

To be clear, Death Watch is a brutal and dangerous group with a specific mindset but all Mandalorians are brutal and dangerous to outsiders if it fits their goals. And I would like the books actually to examine the similarities and differences, to give us as much as possible objective view on Mandalorians and to actually use Arla Fett in meaningful way by expanding our knowledge about her and Jango’s past or generally about Tor and Jaster’s conflict or at least let her to heal and find peace without making a survivor of trauma another “wife” to make one of favorite boys a happy man.

[mistflyer1102]

bugs

A/N: ImpComm era, AU in which Etain survives Order 66.

Summary: A short conversation between Etain and Kad about bugs while heading inside for the day.

-----------------------

As soon as she could see the clouds, Etain knew it was almost time to go back inside.

“Kad? Kad, we need to go back inside before it starts snowing,” she called, scanning the clumps of frost-coated grasses. She could barely make out the ground in the early evening light, and given that it was off the beaten path, she knew the grass was also tall. She could hear her son’s soft giggles nearby, and could sense him a few feet ahead of her. However, she could also tell that by hiding, he had no intentions of going back inside anytime soon. Snowfall or not, he planned to stay outside as long as he could. She had only meant to let him loose for a couple hours - the sun had actually come out that morning - to burn off some energy, but they ended up staying outside all day. She never planned to wander far from the family home on Mandalore, though, and could still see it if she turned around and looked back.

Etain took a step back when the patch of grass in front of her abruptly shook as Kad pushed them aside. “But Mama, you haven’t seen my hiding spot yet. It’s around here somewhere,” he said, pulling himself to his feet. Etain knelt slightly to brush off the dirt from his head, arms, shoulders, and torso. “Mird helped me find it,” he said while looking up at her with a grin, before he wrinkled his nose and grudgingly turned around at her encouragement.

“Really? What else did Mird show you?” she asked as she brushed the rest of the dirt off of his back. She took his hand in hers as he twisted around to face her again, and winced at how cold his fingers felt against hers. “Where are your gloves?” she asked as she leaned over his head to check his other hand.

He stuffed his hand into his coat pocket before she could see. “I don’t know. Mird was helping me look for bugs when we found a hole that we could crawl into. We could only go in one at a time, but it had roots and a lot of bugs,” he said, hunching his shoulders as he and Etain began to walk back to their house. Etain could see that more lights were on than earlier when she had last looked back. Even after four years on Mandalore, Etain still easily lost track of time. She and Darman had moved out of the main Skirata household about a year after she’d recovered from Order 66, but remained close by.

Etain couldn’t help wrinkling her nose at the mention of bugs. Well, that explains the beetles in the nightstand drawer last week. “Well, maybe we don’t bring the bugs to bed with you next time?” she suggested as she guided Kad back to the house. She gently squeezed Kad’s shoulder as a thought occurred to her. “Maybe if you ask Buir nicely, he can help you build something to put the bugs in next time you go collecting with Mird,” she suggested as they walked.

Kad glanced up at her. “Can I keep it in my room?”

Etain said, “If it’s secure enough that the bugs don’t get out, then yes, you may keep it in your room.”

“Can Mird help?”

Etain hummed. “Ask Uncle Walon when he comes to visit, okay?” she said, wrapping a gentle arm around Kad’s shoulders.

Kad was quiet. “And no bugs in the baby’s room, right?”

Ah. Ruusan had warned Etain that this might happen, when Etain and Darman had started planning for a second child last year. Having grown up in the Temple crèche there had been no competition for attention that she could recall, not as a child herself or when she visited the crèche as a Padawan to assist the crèche masters. Darman had grown up with his original squadmates. He’d once told her that while he hadn’t experienced much competition with his squadmates, there had definitely been competition among the squads. Ruusan Skirata, despite being the youngest of three, had heard from her siblings about what it was like having a new sibling in the house. Especially when Ruusan’s older brother, Tor, had had several kids of his own. Illippi may have been alone raising the three of them, but Ruusan said Illippi did her best to keep things fair among the three siblings.

Etain technically wasn’t showing yet, she and Darman planned to keep it a secret for now. But they’d told Kad, and Etain hoped to slowly get him used to the idea of a sibling before the baby was born. But she didn’t push, she wanted Kad to adjust to the idea at his pace. She’d reassured him that despite the changes, she and Darman would still love him as much as they do now.

She finally said, “Well, no, maybe not right away. We don’t know yet what kind of bugs your brother or sister will like, or if they like bugs at all. We should probably wait to see what happens, okay?”

Kad looked up at her, and she gave him an encouraging smile as they came to a stop a few meters from the entrance. “Buir is still gonna help me make that thing to keep the bugs in, right?”

Etain nodded. “I’m sure he will if you ask nicely.”

Kad chirped, “Okay!” before making a dash across the yard to the door. Etain winced as some mud splashed up in his wake. She sighed, and smiled faintly to herself as she wrapped her cloak tighter around herself before following Kad into the house.

She still checked Kad's bedroom that night, while Kad was in his bath, for any loose bugs.

[wardensantoineandevka]

I’m going to be stuck thinking about Zey like on his lunch break typing into the government database like “Rusan Skirata -> Ruusan Skirata -> Skirata  -> Ruusaan Skirata” or whatever

[kats-chaotic-wonderland]

Clone Adoption Agency (Chapter 6)

This one took a while to get to but hey here we are! Enjoy!

Kaviir woke up early to find her mother poking her, “Wake up, hun. If you want to go train with Skirata? You need to be up now.”

With a stretch she hopped out of bed. Moving as quickly as a sleepy kid could she dressed, freshened up, and headed out to the kitchen.

Vette had packed her a cold lunch and smiled, “Alright, have fun, and behave, okay?”

"Yes ma'am!" Kaviir waved as she headed out. She found Skirata standing in the training area with another clone cadet who could assume was Darman. She was practically bouncing as she made her way over to them.

Skirata looked at her and chuckled, “Well well, you actually showed up.”

"Of course I did." She grinned wide and excited.

“Well I’m glad you did.” He motioned her over to them, “Kaviir, meet Darman; Darman, Kaviir.”

“Hi!” The boy waved to her, “I heard I was going to be getting a new partner for my training, but I didn’t expect a different clone like you! Who are you modeled after?”

She giggled and shook her head,"I'm actually not a clone. I'm Commander Ruusan's daughter."

“Who?” He tilted his head to the side. “I don’t know that I’ve met that commander yet.”

"She's really nice." She giggled,"She looks like me but bigger."

“Ah.” Darman nodded, still looking a little confused.

Skirata stepped over and ruffled his hair, “Alright you two, enough chit chat, let’s get to work.”

"Yes sir!" They said in sync as they straightened to attention.

Skirata spent the next several hours teaching them about the art of explosives. They had dummy modules they could build and run, and Darman would often lean over and point out some tips to Kaviir, who found that he was rather kind, and she much enjoyed his company. Kaviir was listening intently and took in as much information as possible. She was surprisingly good at retaining the information and putting it into practice, and Darman found that he quite enjoyed her company as well. The two of them got on cheerfully as they worked on the practice dets that Kal had given them.

After a few hours and several successful exercises, Skirata smiled and set down another piece of hardware in front of them, “Alright, exam time.” He chuckled, “Use the information you learned during todays course to construct this device, when you’re finished, test it on the target.” He motioned to a droid squad that was standing still and looking around the room.

"Yes sir." Kaviir and Darman nodded as they looked the devices over. Skirata left them alone for the next half hour. Darman eventually looked over to her and cleared his throat, “So… what all do you do for fun?”

"Usually train with the boys, or mess with Vau. But I've been told to leave him alone for a while." She shrugged and smiled at him,"what about you?"

“Pretty much the same thing, except for the part with Commander Vau, we’re not brave enough to mess with him.” He shook his head, “I like to learn more about engineering things like this in my down time though, it’s a lot of fun for me.”

"Tell me about it?" She smiled

Darman spent the next several minutes explaining the ins and outs of bomb making. As he talked Kaviir listened and gave him her full attention as they worked. Once he had finished his device, he looked over to Kaviir and peaked into her own capsule, “How’s yours going?”

She had hers mostly finished,"Almost done. I think yours is better."

“Maybe?” He shrugged, “Depends on what they do.”

"How so?" She asked, looking at the device curiously. It didn't have explosives like the others they had been training with. Instead it looked like it had a dye pack. That had thrown her off a little with the wiring.

“I don’t know, that’s just it. I’ve never constructed one of these before. Totally new model.” He shrugged and looked to their respective targets, “I guess there’s only one way to find out.”

She nodded and finished hers. Then she grinned,"Wanna do it together or take turns?"

“Hmmm… on one hand, taking turns would probably provide better evidence as to what we’re doing.” Darman paused and gave her a smirk, “On the other hand, we follow rule number eleven.”

"Rule eleven?" She asked

“P for plenty.” Darman gave her a playful wink, “If you’re not sure that one is enough, use more. Better safe than sorry.”

"Ah, together then?" She grinned

“Together.” He nodded.

They both tossed their small devices at the same time. They impacted and detonated in a cloud of bright red dust. The cloud seemed to settle quickly, and the droids were now covered in the substance.

As they watched the dust settle, Kal clapped and walked up behind them, “Good work, you two. Now, watch this.” He pulled out a small ion pistol and shot it at a single droid. As the bolt made contact, it seemed to shatter across the first droid and spread out across the others, igniting the blots of red dust. With a single blaster shot, the droid squad had been completely wiped out.

Darman was smiling widely and jumping up and down, “Kal’buir! That was amazing!”

"It explodes!?" Kaviir grinned excitedly joining Darman as she quickly fumbled to her feet.

“What part of bomb making did you miss?” Kal chuckled and ruffled Kaviir’s hair, “Yes, when I heard of your little stunt in Vau’s quarters, I knew I had the perfect way to help take your mind off of things. This powder, when mixed into those devices, becomes electromagnetically charged, clinging to any metallic surface it touches and becoming static-locked. Having enough powder on surface also keeps it charged for a few seconds, allowing a well placed ion shot to disrupt any electronics that the metallic surface contains.”

"I love you." She said dramatically and hugged him,"That is the coolest thing I've ever seen."

“I love you too, kiddo.” He smiled.

Darman was staring at Kaviir wide eyed for several moments.

She grinned and pulled away then she turned to see Darman staring,"You okay?"

“What did you do to Vau?!?!” He cried out, more impressed than anything else.

Skirata laughed and set Kaviir down next to the boy, “Here we go…”

"Oh, well..." She gave him the full story of the dye pack and nearly falling into the ocean, then shrugged as she finished like she hadn't just confessed to what was probably some kind of domestic terrorism,"He totally deserved it."

“Fier’fek…” Darman’s mind was racing with one thousand different thoughts. “That’s something else.” He smiled and grabbed Kaviir, wrapping her into a hug, “Definitely glad you decided to come along.”

She giggled and hugged him,"Me too. This is fun."

“Alright, you two.” Kal chuckled and picked both of them up in his arms, “Let’s go. Kaviir, are you ready to head back to your moms?”

"Awe.... I'm having fun." She pouted

“I know, but it’s starting to get late, and the lessons over.” Kal grinned, “Come on, I’ll walk with you, Darman, good job today, son. Get back to your brothers.”

“Yes sir.” He saluted before looking to Kaviir and giving her one final wave and a smile, “Bye!”

"Bye!" She waved and sighed as Kal set him down and he left. Once he was gone she turned back to Kal,"I'm worried about Mom."

“Why’s that, little one?” Kal frowned and shifted her in his arms, “Something she said or did?”

"She's been stressed a lot." She frowned,"And...I think I made it worse."

“How so?” Kal tilted his head and began to instinctively bounce her.

"Because I keep causing problems, and I volunteered to be a soldier without even thinking about how mom would feel." She shook her head,"I feel bad."

“Well, you’re sort of right.” Kal sighed, “Kaviir, parents are always going to worry about their kids, part of the job.”

"Yeah, I know." She nodded feeling the uncomfortable grip of guilt start worming around her stomach.

“The hardest part of being a parent is realizing that we won’t always be able to keep you kids safe. It’s especially hard for adopted kids, because we want to see you all succeed so much, that we actively choose to bring you into our lives. Vette has always been… attached.” He ran a hand through his hair, “As for the boys… she’s going to have to…part… with a lot of them, and she’s trying so hard to keep it all together. She’s not mad at you, sweetheart, she loves you with all she is, but… she’s tired, I think we all are.”

"Yeah." Kaviir nodded, her smile had dropped and she looked tired herself,"I know we're going to lose so many of them....I just want to be helpful when they have to fight. And I want to help mom. I know I'm not going to fix it, but I want to do something."

“That’s all you can do, little one.” Kal nodded, “Just be there for them, all of them, and remember, you’re one of the boys, but you’re still her little girl too. Don’t let her feel like you’re not.”

"Yeah." She nodded,"What can I do to give her a break?"

“I’m not sure.” Kal shook his head, “Try just spending some time with her.”

"Yeah....I try not to get in her way with training so I guess I've been a little distant." She frowned,"I'll take some more time with her."

“That’s all any parent wants.” Kal smiled and poked her nose. “She loves you, ad’ika.”

"I love her too." She smiled

Kal went to say something, but his attention was caught by a group of Kaminoans. There were a group of children surrounding two others. Kal set Kaviir down and told her, “Stay here, don’t move.”

She nodded, but watched curiously.

Kal walked over and paused for a moment before screaming at the rest of them to get away. Kaviir couldn’t see much detail, but it looked like a mother was holding her child in her arms on the floor, she was beaten badly.

She stepped a little closer looking concerned.

Kal looked back and saw Kaviir. He pointed his finger back, “No.” he said sternly.

She stopped and stepped back a step.

Kal cleared out the rest of them, some tried to protest, but Kal ejected a three sided knife from his gauntlet and held it against the throat of the leader of the Kaminoan group. Kaviir was never sure if these thing could feel fear, but now she definitely had her answer. After everything had cleared up, Kal looked over to Kaviir, “Go home, ad’ika. And don’t turn back, for anything.”

She frowned,"Kal, what is happening?'

“Nothing that you need to worry about right now. Go home, Kaviir, that’s an order.”

She sighed,"Yes sir." And went to leave.

---------------------------------

Kaviir made her way through the halls of kamino alone. The sound of Skirata and the others fading as she headed back to their room. The silence slowly crept in making her feel more uneasy with every quick little step. She really hated being alone in this place.

The childlike fears of those monsters taking her away crept into her mind. The thought driving her to move ever faster.

As she passed a vent, she stopped.

There was a shuffle coming from inside the vent.

Slowly, she turned. Her eyes, wide and terrified, meeting with eyes like hers. Wide and terrified.

Something was starring at her.

Hesitation gripped her, but she knelt down and spoke softly,"....h-hello..."

The eyes blinked, something about the shape was familiar, it bothered her. She couldn't make out what they were part of though.

She tried again,"Are....are you stuck? Do you need help?"

She could see it shake it's head. The green catching the glint of the lights.

"Are....are you friendly?" She asked hopefully

It tilted it head, looking confused. She reached out towards the vent, but the sound of kaminoans approaching spooked it. It's eyes grew fearful as it shuffled away.

Frowning Kaviir stood up and watched as they passed. Once they were gone she took off running for her mother.

--------------------------------

She made her way home without any issue. Going inside she looked for her mom and found her sitting in one of the chairs reviewing a datapad. Kaviir went over to her and gently took the data pad. Then after setting it aside she turned and hugged her mom tightly.

“Hey.” Vette sounded a little surprised, “What’s wrong?” She wrapped her daughter into a hug and held her close.

"I just don't spend enough time with you." She shrugged,"We should do more together."

“Oh, sweetheart… it’s okay.” Vette smiled and picked her up and walked her around, “We’ve both been busy lately.”

"Yeah, but I don't want you to feel like you're going through this alone."

“Baby girl. I’ve never felt alone with you around. But, I know what you mean.” She kissed Kaviir on the cheek, “I love you so much, Kav’ika.”

"I love you too momma." She smiled and kissed her cheek

“Okay.” Vette pulled her back and saw the look in Kaviir’s eyes, “What’s wrong? Something else is bothering you, did something happen at training today?”

"Well..." She filled her in on the events of the day, including the moment with Kal, however she found herself leaving out the thing in the vents.

Vette sighed and sat Kaviir down. “Stay here, I’ll be back in a minute.”

"Okay?" She nodded confused

Vette walked off and left her alone. Once she left, Kaviir decided to get herself a snack and do something to occupy herself. After a few minutes she found herself on the living room floor, sat at the coffee table with some of her art supplies. The next few minutes were filled with her doodling while she ate, and tried to settle the unease in her stomach.

After a while though, she felt eyes on her.

Once she realized what she was feeling, she slowly looked around the room. Doors, kitchen, freshers, all empty. She thought she might be imagining things until something shuffled in the vent behind her. Slowly, she turned. Her eyes meeting green eyes again.

"oh...hi again..." She said surprised

A voice spoke back in a scared, childlike whisper,"....hello...."

Kaviir paused, looked at him surprised, then shifted a little closer,"You talk?"

He nodded.

"Are you nice?"

He nodded again.

She looked around and picked up a multi tool her mother had for working on their gear,"If I let you out are you going to hurt me?"

He let out a small whine,"No...no hurt."

She nodded,"Okay. I'm trusting you." Then she went to work opening the vent. It took some trying, but soon she had it open and the Kaminoan was able to slip out.

Dropping the grate back in place she found herself sitting beside a young boy. She looked at him surprised, "Woah... Why were you in the vent?"

He looked a little saddened,"Scared."

"Why?" She frowned, but the look he gave her made her heart hurt,"Oh..." She figured it out quickly enough, it had something to do with why Kal was angry. She didn't think about it, she just pulled him into a hug,"I'm sorry."

He was surprised, not returning the affection, not really even sure what to do in this moment. He stared in confused surprise as she held him close. Slowly she pulled away to look him in the eyes,"What's your name?"

He thought for a moment, as though weighing the potential issues of telling her. But just as she thought maybe he wouldn't say anything, he spoke softly. "Leruc Sul."

She smiled softly,"Hi, I'm Kaviir Ruusan." Kaviir held his hands,"Leruc, are you in danger here?"

He nodded, looking down shamefully.

"Okay, I'll find a way to get you to safety." She nodded determined,"You can stay here with me, no one will look for you here."

He looked at her a little surprised,"Helping....why?"

"you're a kid, kids deserve to feel safe." She smiled,"I'll ask mo-" she stopped herself, thinking about everything her mom already had to deal with. She shook her head instead,"I'll ask Jango. He can pretty much do what he wants."

He looked nervous at the suggestion.

"I promise it'll be okay." She gave him another hug,"We'll keep you out of sight while I talk to him."

He nodded and looked at her still a little confused by the gesture.

They took a while to find him some hiding places, and for Kaviir to get him something to eat.

Vette was gone for nearly an hour. When she returned, she seemed visibly angry. Kaviir had just finished helping Leruc hide in her closet, barely getting sat on the couch, and was a little confused as her mother came in grumbling.

Kaviir hopped up from her seat and looked at her concerned,"Mom? You okay?"

“No.” She shook her head, “These damn Kaminoans… just because the kid had green eyes.”

"What?" She asked confused, but she already had a good idea of what happened.

“That mom and her kid from the hallway. They were killed.” Vette felt tears streaming down her cheeks, “Just because the kid had green eyes.”

Kaviir didn't know what to say, she just stood there. She couldn't say anything to her mom, she was already so stressed. Vette looked over to Kaviir and wiped herself clean. She gave an obviously fake smile to hide her pain, “Green eyes… so pretty.” She wrapped her up into a hug and sighed.

"Mom," Kaviir said softly holding Vette tight, "You don't have to be the tough one all the time."

“Hey.” She gave a soft laugh while poking Kaviir on the nose, “Moms are tough.”

"Yeah, but so are kids." She smiled hugging her tightly.

“Well, what do you say we take some time for just us away from all of these assholes.”

"Yes please." She grinned, nodding quickly.

“Well, you’ve always wanted to ride an aiwha.”

Her face lit up,"Please tell me we're finding an aiwha!"

“Indeed we are my little Nexu.” Vette ruffled her hair, “Get ready, we’re going to be deep sea diving.”

"Yes!" She bounced and went to get ready

Vette smiled and shook her head, “Well, she did say she wanted us to do something together.” She grabbed her own helmet and readied her gear.

Kaviir padded into her room, shutting the door and quickly peeking in to check on Leruc,"Leruc?" She whispered softly.

He looked up at her from where he was all cuddled in some of her blankets.

"We're going out for a little bit, please stay in the apartment, you can get snacks in the kitchen if you need them. Just be careful if you hear someone coming okay?"

He nodded and looked a little worried.

"it'll be okay," she smiled,"I'll come check on you as soon as I'm back. I promise."

Another nod. Kaviir smiled tucked him in and gave him some quiet toys and games to keep him entertained. Then she closed the closet and headed out.

Vette nodded as she came back into the living room, “Come on, let’s go.” She walked them both to the platform that her ship was on. “Well, before we do this, I suppose I should teach you how to fly, shouldn’t I?”

"Fly?" Kaviir blinked looking confused.

“The ship.” Vette smiled, “Figure I could show you a thing or two.”

"Yes please!" She grinned bouncing excitedly.

Vette nodded and led her up to the cockpit, “Okay, take the controls.” She sat in the seat next to Kaviir.

She nodded and did so, looking a little nervous. She'd never been allowed to touch the ship controls by herself before. Their ship lifted to the air and hovered over the platform.

“Good. Now… slowly pull out over the water.” Vette set her hand on Kaviir’s shoulder, “Don’t worry, if you get scared, I can take over.”

She shook her head,"I can do it.'

“Okay.” Vette let her take control, “Now, hit the thrusters and move us in this direction.”

She nodded and did so, trying to keep everything steady. They traveled for several more minute before Vette smiled, “You’re a natural, hun.”

"Thanks." She grinned, but the knots in her stomach said that flying was never going to be her favorite thing.

“Are you having fun?” Vette asked.

"Yes." She giggled, somewhat lying.

“Good.” Vette looked down to a spot in the waters, “Okay, bring us to a standstill.”

"Yes ma'am."

Once they were still, Vette picked Kaviir up and smiled, “Right, you ready for this?”

"Absolutely!" She grinned

Vette nodded as they waited overhead. Soon a massive aiwha emerged from the water and circled around them.

Kaviir ginned watching it

“Wanna give it a go?” Vette smiled.

"Give what?"

“Riding it?” Vette motioned to the aiwha down below.

"Really!" She looked excited, trying really hard not to bounce and rock the hovering ship they were standing on.

“Yeah, come on, we’ll give it a shot.” Vette smiled and poked her daughters stomach. “Hang on to me, okay?”

"Yes ma'am!" She grinned grabbing her mother tightly.

Vette grabbed Kaviir and held her close as she ignited her jet pack and landed on the beast. It let out a small yelp, but quickly settled with the two of them on top of it. It took off towards the horizon with the two of them on its back. Giggling kaviir kept a tight hold on her mom. But she reached a hand down and pet the creatures back. It seemed to look back and stare at her. It made an echoing sound as it flapped its wings to gain a bit of height. She giggled and waved to it.

Vette leaned in and chuckled, “I think she likes you.”

"I definitely like her." She grinned, she seemed to be having the time of her life.

Vette smiled and looked around the waters, “Good. Now stay here.” She let herself fall off the beast and dive head first into the black waters below.

Kaviir looked panicked for a moment but stayed put. Watching the water for where her mother might be.

After a few more minutes had passed, something large shot out of the water with Vette on its back. It was a male aiwha, and it was MASSIVE.

Kaviir went wide eyed as she watched

Vette flew alongside next to Kaviir and nodded, “Your mom still had some moves, doesn’t she?” She called out to her.

"Hell yeah!" She said excitedly as she threw her hands up excitedly.

Vette stared at her silently for a moment, “So… you WERE the one who taught the boys how to swear.” She laughed, “You’re definitely a sister.”

"I already admitted to that!" She pouted

“I meant recenlty.” She smiled beneath her helmet, “They’re getting good at it.”

"Blame Jango. He taught me!"

“I don’t believe that for an instant.” Vette shook her head, “Come on, let’s get back to the ship.”

"Awe, already?"

“Do you want to fly around for a bit longer?” Vette smiled.

"Yes!"

Vette relented and nodded her head, “Okay. A good half hour, deal?” She smiled.

"Woo!" She grinned and basically flopped into the Aiwha. The creature let out a playful squeak as it dipped down towards the water. Vette followed behind Kaviir. Kaviir was giggling as she clung to its back. It swooped back up and was gliding over the waves. It seemed very relaxed around her. Smiling, she gave it a gentle scritch on its head. It seemed to be enjoying her company. After a little while, Vette laughed and called out, “Alright, little Nexu, let’s get back to the ship!”

"Fiiine." She groaned and hugged the Aiwha again.

Once they had arrived, Vette smiled and helped her back on the ship, “Okay, take the ship back, I’ll be there soon enough.”

"Wait.... you're not coming?" She frowned

“I’m going to take care of these guys, shouldn’t take me too long.” Vette looked back, “I’ll message Jango and let him know to keep an eye out for you if you need help, okay? We still have to help the boys in training today, remember?”

"Osik!" She smacked her forehead,"Sorry, got caught up in bonding and riding giant flap flaps."

“First of all, seriously… language, at least wait til you’re sixteen before you go overboard.” She shook her head, “Well, you can play with the ‘flap flaps’ whenever you finish training. For now, get back to the platform and go find Jango.”

"Yes ma'am!" She nodded

Once she was confident she was off, Vette looked down to the male aiwha and sighed, “Sorry, friend. You’re not going to like what comes next… but I’ll need your help in dealing with this Kaminoan elitism, at the very least in making sure it’s safe for my little girl.”

Chapter 5

Chapter 7

Star Wars Master Post

Clone Adoption Agency Navigation

(Vette belongs to @the-churroguy )

[izzyovercoffee]

@variative:

#also imo it really helps explain why Ruusaan acts the way she does #I mean I can just see it going through her mind #'if I get this right then maybe my dad won't leave again' 'if I get this right I won't end up abandoned and dead like mom' 

g od, I didn’t even ... consider that. 

the tragedy of this whole thing is that Ruusan still wants a relationship with the man who didn’t even bother to try to keep it until he thought she might be dead. what kind of man is that, really? but Ruusan still sees him as someone idyllic, someone she wants, needs, that connection with that she never had a chance nor a choice to have as a child.

[izzyovercoffee]

Let’s talk about Ilippi Skirata Jiro

Ilippi, the ex-wife of Kal Skirata, and often a woman who holds a contentious position in fandom by virtue of being Kal Skirata’s dead ex-wife who left him.

She somehow manages to exist in all of the wonderful spaces that ex-wives tend to inhabit:

just didn’t try hard enough to understand him, ie a bad wife

drained him of his money

left him for just no discernible reason 

blamed as the cause of his biological sons divorcing him

Here’s the thing ... fandom often flagrantly overlooks what he, himself, admits to have done and caused Ilippi grief. And I’m here to put these things together in a way you can understand and see as the red flags that they are.

So. Let’s get started.

First, I want to talk about what Kal literally says in the novels.

Kal fell in love with Ilippi, and Ilippi fell in love with Kal. That’s indisputable. 

But love isn’t enough to maintain a marriage. Here’s a list of what Kal admits to doing, and being:

she never really embraced the culture, but he still

moved her to a mandalorian town as soon as they were married 

he left for long periods at a time to fight in someone else’s war

he wasn’t there for Ilippi when she needed him, including being away for long periods to leave her to raise 3 young children alone

he couldn’t understand nor empathize with her

she never argued nor fought with him until he expressed intent to bring his son to fight with him on the front lines 

They look like innocent misunderstandings in a list to people who aren’t aware of what these bullet points really ... indicate together (except that last one ... like, don’t defend that last one, seriously). For those who are aware, though ... these are all red flags of an unequal marriage doomed to fail AT BEST. (at worst ... well.) 

I understand wanting to paint the picture of the marriage of a soldier in active duty. I do. And I understand wanting to sympathize with that image. I do. But, ... spouses of people in active duty have access to resources and support. They have support systems and support groups, and a community.

That’s just not the situation that was Kal and Ilippi’s failed marriage.

Ilippi did not have any support, at all.

“What are you talking about, Izzy?” Let me show you. (This goes under a cut due to how long it’s gotten, complete with quotes from the text.)

The sweet medicinal scent of the resin reminded [Kal] of the first months of his marriage, when he was crazy about a Corellian nightclub waitress called Ilippi Jiro and he tried to teach her some essential skills of a proper Mandalorian wife—how to build a basic field shelter, a vheh’ yaim, and cook over an open fire. She never did get the hang of splitting logs. He didn’t care. He loved her, they had a small town house in Shuror where she never had to cook over open flames, and he never believed the fire would die in their relationship.

--- Imperial Commando: 501st, pp 125

The emphasized indicates that as soon as they married, they moved away.

Shuror is a small rural mandalorian town located in Mandalorian space, in the middle of what could be described as forest country.

Ilippi is Corellian. She grew up on a city planet, and her entire family (that we know of) lived on Corellia.

Corellia is located in The Core. Shuror is in the Outer Rim.

There is no easy way for Ilippi’s family to see her, or her them, in this situation. There’s no way for them to be involved with their grandchildren. There’s no way for her to seek support from them if she needs it.

In addition to not being in easy reach of support from her family, she also never took to being a mandalorian. 

[Kal’s] wife wasn’t Mandalorian. He’d hoped she would embrace the culture, but she didn’t ....

--- Republic Commando: Triple Zero, pp 12

Even after all the years of marriage, which at that point was at least eight years of living in Shuror, she was still explicitly stated to not be mandalorian.

Mandalorians, as much as I love them as a people, are not kind to outsiders. For someone to live among them for as long as she did and not become mandalorian by assimilation points to her being  isolated, at best. The community did not, or could not, do more than the bare minimum to support her because of her status as a perpetual outsider, if they supported her at all. 

And, most likely? They didn’t.

So. To reiterate: Kal moved a city girl from Corellian space, in the core, to the Outer Rim --- to an isolated town in the middle of nowhere, immediately after they married.

For those of you who don’t know ... this is a huge red flag. Regardless of how you feel about Kal personally, none of the above puts Ilippi in a good position. 

It makes life very difficult for her when it doesn’t need to be, and when it never needed to be. 

The next point makes the above worse, because not only was Ilippi fresh out of the city and dropped into the country, completely out of her depth and in need of support in adjusting to the new environment ... but Kal then left her, for long periods at a time, to fight in wars.

Kal, her only support when she was in Shuror, left her alone.

Ilippi thought the beskar’gam was dashing when she married Skirata, but his long absences on deployment started to wear on her with three small kids to care for ....

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 105

I don’t know if you know, but raising even one small child takes loads of energy. It is difficult, beyond difficult, and help? Is sorely needed. And that’s just for one small child.

Ilippi had three children, and they were all close in age. Tor at age 7 coming on 8, Ijaat age 6, Ruusan age 5. All of them roughly one to two, maybe three, years apart. Children, at these ages, are very active. Very energetic. And get into all kinds of trouble.

And Ilippi was, essentially, a single mother raising three children with Kal occasionally present, by his own admission. And Kal knew it was difficult. He knew that she struggled with it. 

But not only did she struggle with it, so did he.

Skirata knew that Darman might never arrive home, throw his kit bag on the hall floor, and sob on his wife’s shoulder, relieved and grateful and swearing it would be his last tour of duty.

--- Republic Commando: Triple Zero, pp 271

This is in Kal’s POV chapter, and the way this is framed, is what Kal believes is normal --- and we can assume that it is normal for him. This is how he views married life, this is what “wife” means, to him.

The tragedy of this is that, for Kal, war is all he ever knew ... but even if that’s the case, even if he could never change his ways, he did not have to isolate Ilippi the way he did.  

The simple solution would have been to stay on or move back to Corellia, to let her parents help her raise their children. They could have moved into a mandalorian neighborhood on Corellia if a mandalorian connection was absolutely needed, or moved to a port city on Mandalore that would have been more comfortable and open to outsiders.

Kal, himself, never mentioned having any family in Shuror. There are no reasons, no explanations, no ties for them to move to a mandalorian town. 

She was unhappy. An aruetti in a mandalorian town? There was no way Ilippi could ever have felt welcome, no matter how long she lived there. But, byKal’s own words, she never fought with him ... until he threatened their children.

Now, understand, from Kal’s point of view that’s not what he’s doing. But from a rational person’s point of view? He absolutely is threatening the life and welfare of her children --- that, again, by his own admission, he was often absent from helping in raising them. 

The fights began when [Kal] wanted to take their two sons into battle with him. They were eight years old, old enough to start learning their trade; but she refused, and soon Ilippi and the boys and his daughter were no longer waiting when he returned from the latest war.

--- Republic Commando: Triple Zero, pp 13

and

[Ilippi] hit the big cultural wall—Tor was coming up on eight years old, and Skirata wanted to do as all Mando fathers did, to take his son to train and fight alongside him for five years.

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 105

“Isn’t she overreacting, Izzy?” You might ask. I would argue ... maybe if it was anyone else and not Kal, maybe. But Kal never shied away, in any of the above passages nor the one I’m about to quote, exactly where he tended to fight, where he intended to take them.

“Where are you?” [Tor] asked. “Who’s—oh, wow, that’s the Republic army.”

“They’re clone troops,” Skirata said. My boys, too. “I’m on the front line.”

“You always were.”

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 105

He fully intended to take small children with him into active warzones, to fight with him on the front lines.

Not to be culturally insensitive but war is no place for children. It doesn’t matter how capable you think they are, it doesn’t matter what culture is in the forefront here ... the fact is, an active warzone is not a place to raise a child.

Significant emotional, physical, and mental development occurs in the ages before ten years old --- and then upon hitting ten, even more important development occurs. War, and the trauma of war and constant fighting, significantly impedes that development and causes long-lasting issues.

And that very knowledge is specifically stated to be things that the clones are unfairly dealing with. Yet, it’s framed as unfair for Ilippi to react like she did when Kal made it clear he intended to take Tor with him to the front lines.

Verd’goten is a coming of age test. But nothing about the verd’goten lists war as a requirement. 

To be clear: Ilippi never fought with Kal until Kal directly threatened the life of one of her children. And yes, it is a threat on his life. Realize that Ilippi is still a civilian with values from The Core, where children don’t have to be soldiers until they’re old enough to make that choice for themselves. Not to have that choice made for them by the person who is supposed to be their parent.

Trust me, I understand where Kal is coming from. But just because I understand where he’s coming from doesn’t make Kal any less wrong. Not all mandalorians commit their children to war. To assume that that’s the only way to come of age is ... a tragedy. For the child, and the parent who thinks it.

I also want to revisit how Kal remembers that moment, because it is important how it’s remembered, too.

Skirata could picture Ilippi now, five-year-old Ruusaan and six-year-old Ijaat clinging to her legs, crying, while she yelled that no baby boy of hers was going to war. From that argument—and she shouldn’t have yelled like that, not in front of the kids—their marriage went rapidly downhill. The next time he came home on leave, the kids were with her parents on Corellia, and she told him she wanted a divorce.

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 105

From the bolded, you can tell that Kal just ... doesn’t understand why she reacted as strongly as she did. To frame it as if she was being irrationally emotional, as if her reaction was too extreme for his request, shows that Kal fundamentally doesn’t understand Ilippi as a person. 

On a fundamental level, Kal doesn’t know Ilippi. 

And, on a fundamental level, Kal doesn’t know himself. 

But Ilippi clearly knows Kal. Kal, for all his apparent sensibility, is someone to be described often as stubborn. Once his mind is set, it is difficult to get him to change it. That’s in his nature, in his character, and who he is.

And Ilippi knows this. She knows how he is, and knows that he’s stubborn.

If Kal brings it up once, that he intends to bring Tor to the front lines with him, then not only does he intend to do that to Tor, but also Ijaat, and then Ruusan. And Ilippi, in a mandalorian town, surrounded by a culture that is in support of Kal, has no power to stop him. 

And when her children are threatened, and only when they were threatened, did she suddenly fight him --- and fight him with such an extreme reaction that he wasn’t expecting it and couldn’t empathize.

But, again, to reiterate:

Ilippi was isolated in a town she couldn’t fit in with

surrounded by people that would always view her as an outsider

raised three young children close in age mostly without Kal’s help

with no support system and no one else to rely on

for eight years

To say that this wasn’t an expected or rational response of Ilippi would be to be blind to neglect and isolation, and have no empathy with a single parent trying to raise three children without help.

Kal is a big part of this communication problem. Often he left, came back, made empty promises to never leave, only to go back on his word and do so. On top of that, he could not empathize with her.

In the past, he had been the one who went to war and left a family behind. Now he was the one waiting for news, and suddenly he had a much better idea of what Ilippi had gone through while they were married. Waiting was hard. Even with the latest comlinks and transponders to stay in touch—a luxury his ex-wife never had—the minutes were still long and empty, begging to be filled with the wrong kind of speculation.

So this is what it’s like to be the rear party. Sorry, Ilippi. I never really understood.

--- Imperial Commando: 501st, pp 125

By Kal’s own admission, Ilippi never had a way to contact him if she needed him --- or him to contact her to let her know he was okay. It was, literally, a luxury she never had. 

Long absences, with no way to know if he would ever come home. Eight years of this. Three children to explain that no, she didn’t know when they would see their buir again, and no, she couldn’t comm him to check up.

But also, that’s eight long years to go with Kal being married to a woman he fundamentally did not understand and could not empathize with. He didn’t even realize that waiting was hard. And Ilippi still stuck with him, for manda knows what reason, up until she couldn’t for the safety of their children. 

And even then, even after, Kal still couldn’t see that that was the reason that broke them apart. To Kal, Ilippi was acting irrationally. He did not even try to consider why she reacted the way she did. 

I would have raised you smarter, son .... Please don’t let [Ruusan] be a mercenary. I wasn’t there to teach her how to stay alive.

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 106

He genuinely believes he would have raised them better, smarter, wiser, capable. And for all we know, he may be right. But even now, thirty years later, he’s still incapable of understanding how and why Ilippi didn’t see it that way.

“But Izzy! She drained him dry, took every last credit he had!”

Well ... yes and no.

Here’s the thing: Kal NEVER, not once, anywhere, ever mentioned that she asked for his credits. To rephrase, Ilippi never asked for his credits. She asked for a divorce, but that doesn’t mean credits. The way mandalorian marriages work is different than what we do. And with Kal being the way he is, remembering slights as he does, for him to never mention that she asked ...

Isn’t that a little weird of a detail to leave out if she literally drained him dry? Isn’t that a thing he should have said, at least once?

But anyway, moving on from that point ... child support is a real thing. She had three children to raise as a single parent on Corellia. That was, quite literally, the least that Kal could do. 

And it was, literally, the least he did.

“That’s not fair, Izzy, she already divorced him.” And?

Listen. Ilippi gave him eight years to sort out his bull shit. She gave him eight years of her life trying to make things work on his terms. And it’s very clear from Kal’s point of view that that didn’t work out --- but it’s also very clear that Kal never, not once, tried to make things work on her terms. It was always his way, or no way.

A marriage, a successful marriage, requires compromise. It requires communication. It requires empathy, and sacrifice. Ilippi sacrificed everything. Kal ... didn’t. 

Kal didn’t sacrifice anything. Yes, he put his life on the line again and again. He repeatedly went to war as his method of living. But the thing is that that’s not sacrifice. It’s not.

Sacrifice is moving back to Corellia, so that Ilippi would still have contact with her parents and her friends who could help with the kids when he wasn’t there.

Sacrifice is facing the fact that being away for long periods of time to leave Ilippi to raise three children without help is detrimental to Ilippi’s well-being, Kal’s well-being, and the children’s well-being. 

Sacrifice is accepting that Ilippi suffered alone and that he needed to find a way to stay with her and help her when she needed him, and help the kids because they needed him. Children need their parents at that age.

Even if it meant giving up fighting on the front lines and finding a different way.

That’s what sacrifice would have been, on Kal’s end.

Furthermore ... Kal continued to send credits, but he never talks of even trying to be in their lives as they were growing up. For him, it’s a simple situation: wife divorced him, therefore don’t try to stay in touch with his children.

But like ... life is not like that. Joint custody is a thing. And just because he couldn’t take them with him to war on the front lines doesn’t mean he couldn’t try to be in their lives, or even that he didn’t deserve to be in their lives.

But at no point, anywhere, in any of the novels, does Kal even mention it.

We get a lot of commentary on how Ilippi took his money, but never that Kal tried to stay in their lives and was rebuffed by Ilippi. In fact ... it’s the opposite.

Kal didn’t try to be a father to his own children after Ilippi left. That was something that should have been a responsibility to him, something that should have been important to him ... and he just ... didn’t.

The next time he came home on leave, the kids were with her parents on Corellia, and she told him she wanted a divorce.

It took thirty seconds, Mando-style—a short oath to wed, and a shorter one to part. Skirata handed her all his earnings and left for another war.

Every credit. Every credit I didn’t absolutely need to survive, until the day I left for Kamino. Then I was dead and gone.

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 105

Kal is a martyr for giving up his credits, but Kal never gave up his time or effort for actually being involved in the rearing part of child rearing. And the sympathy we’re meant to feel for him is ... it isn’t deserved. It just isn’t.

“Don’t your sons talk to you any longer?”

“Not often.” So I failed as a father. Don’t rub it in. “Obviously they don’t share the Mando outlook on life any more than their mother does.”

--- Republic Commando: Triple Zero, pp 12

They don’t talk to him. Never how he tried to talk to them and was rebuffed, or rejected. He never, not once, even brings up that kind of thought --- but him giving Ilippi all of his credits comes up in at least three separate occasions, and in one of them it’s framed as if she bled him dry.

Note again that, not once, anywhere, did he ever mention that she asked for credits. With Kal being the way he is, remembering slights as he does ... he never, not once, says that she asked him for credits. Only that he gave them to her. Only that he gave her every last credits.

Like ... Kal, to his biological children, is the absent father. He’s the guy who wants to be a father in theory, but just wasn’t mature enough to be one in actuality, and used his profession as an excuse to why he couldn’t be there --- not once trying to change, but expecting Ilippi to pick up the slack, because that’s what a “good mandalorian wife” should be doing.

And when he couldn’t use his profession as an excuse, Ilippi provided one for him with the divorce.

“But what about his sons! They divorced him! That’s obviously Ilippi’s fault, right?” No, actually ... no.

His children did not divorce him until years later, when they were already adults and Ilippi was dying, and Kal was already on Kamino.

That’s many, many years later.

Passage first:

“But that’s the good thing about being Mando. If you don���t get the family you want, you can go and choose one yourself.” [Kal] looked suddenly older and very sad, small, crushed by time. “You going to tell her? Okay, Etain, my sons disowned me. In Mandalorian law, children can legally disown a parent who’s shamed them, but it’s rare. My sons left with their mother when we split up, and when I disappeared to Kamino and they couldn’t locate me, they declared me dar’buir. No longer a father.”

“Oh my. Oh, I’m sorry.” Etain knew how serious that would be for a Mando’ad. “You found that out when you left Kamino?”

“No. Jango brought the news back that they were looking for me about ... oh, four years in? Three maybe? I forget. Two sons and a daughter. Tor, Ijaat, and Ruusaan.”

“Why were they looking for you?”

“My ex-wife died. They wanted me to know.”

“Oh ...”

“Yeah.”

“But you could have told them where you were at the time. Jango could have talked to them.”

“And?”

“You could have made your peace with them.”

“And?”

“Kal, you could have explained to them somehow and stopped it.”

“And reveal we had an army in training? And compromise my lads’ safety? Never. And not a word to any of the boys, you hear? It’s the only thing I ever kept from them.” 

--- Republic Commando: Triple Zero, pp 217-218

I want you to understand something about this passage: it’s framed specifically to make Kal the martyr, and it’s truly a tragedy. 

But here’s the thing: Ilippi died. And the way Tor speaks about it...

“I just want you to know we’re sorry. It was about Mama, that’s all. We just wanted you to be there when she was dying.”

--- Republic Commando: Order 66, pp 106

She was dying, and there was time for him to go to see her before she passed, had he been in a position to do so. The tragedy isn’t that he wasn’t --- the tragedy was he hadn’t even tried to explain why he couldn’t. 

Tor, Ijaat, and Ruusan’s mother --- the sole parent to raise them, because by Kal’s own admission he was rarely there when they were growing up --- died. And Kal had disappeared. 

To rephrase: Kal was not there when they needed him most. 

I know. Kal had a hard decision to make, and he knew his children could survive on their own. But his sons choosing to disown him? Is not because of Ilippi or her “influence,” or in any way her fault. What she did was die. And what Kal did was abandon his children.

It was a hard decision, but he still abandoned them. Explanations, or not. And they don’t know that --- and they never learned that, because he never chose to tell them, even after the start of the war. 

Whether or not he felt it was his place to explain to them his absence, it doesn’t matter. He made his choice, and that choice has repercussions. Don’t make excuses for Kal. He’s an adult.

And don’t blame Ilippi for something she couldn’t control because all she did was have the audacity to protect her children and then die.

Even if the text would have us believe otherwise, the fact is ... Kal is to blame for his failed marriage. Kal is to blame for his sons declaring dar’buir. Kal is to blame for Ilippi leaving him, and then divorcing him.

Kal is to blame for the major relationships in his life failing. And he never learns from them! He makes the same exact mistakes --- withholds information when he shouldn’t, fails to empathize with others, fails to see from others’ point of view, fails to understand or even try to understand where anyone else is coming from or feeling. 

Everyone around him grows as a person, but Kal remains stagnant from Triple Zero through Imperial Commando, and that’s the real tragedy of his character. He cries, he grieves, he admits to fucking up --- and then he goes on and repeats the exact same mistakes, the exact same grievances, fucks up in exactly the same ways. 

And poor Ilippi had the audacity to know she, and her kids, deserved better.