#rest of the week is cancelled atp

[veryinnovative]

came home from the salon with a botched hairdo and decided to buy a treat to cheer myself up but that tasted awful too

[qkopi]

LINK UP (2)

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pairings: prowler! miles x fem! reader

cw: cheating, profanity, TOXIC milo, VERY suggestive (atp it’s light smut🤷🏻‍♀️)

summary: three weeks. you have been meeting up with milo behind miles’ back for three weeks. miles was bound to find out one way, right?

a/n: u guys r gonna hate me @ the end but i’m sorry i had to do it😭🙏🏽 dw i’m like halfway finished i stg and for the ppl who wants to be in my tag list, i’m sorry i js can’t ts takes way too long i can’t🙅🏻‍♀️

pt 1 <- pt 2 -> pt 3

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“miles but-“

“sorry mi vida, just give me a few minutes okay? i’ll be back before you know it!” miles cut you off as he rushed out of the apartment, leaving you disappointed that your date with him was canceled once again.

you wanted to spend the whole day with miles but it looks like you were now going to spend it with milo.

“well..” milo grinned as he walked over to you.

“looks like we’ve got the place to ourselves, huh?” he had a triumphant look in his eyes, and he couldn’t help but show a condescending smile as he spoke.

“milo, stop. im not in the mood.” you sighed, turning away to not face him as you rubbed your temples.

he raised an eyebrow, coming to a stop a few inches behind you, his right knee bumping one of your left’s. he set a hand on your shoulder, grinning at you.

“something goin on, ma?” milo asked in his signature drawl, a small smirk breaking through his facade of apathy.

the last few days, you had been thinking about ending the affair between you and milo. you felt bad for meeting up with him behind miles’ back, but you couldn’t help it, being with milo felt so good that you seemed to forget everything.

but then, the guilt started to eat you up, feeling horrible to miles as he didn’t know anything that has been happening. you were planning to confront milo tonight after spending the day with miles but looks like time had other plans for you.

“you know damn well what’s going on.” you spat out, still not sparing him a glance.

it went on for 3 weeks, almost a month, this affair with milo had to stop before it could lead to more trouble.

milo let his hand fall to his lap, his smile growing as he moved up to you side, his arms wrapping around your waist loosely and his chin resting on your shoulder.

“how did you come to this conclusion?” he teased, chuckling under his breath before kissing your cheek.

“stop.. stop..” you tried to push him off, knowing his affection were your weaknesses, but it only made his grip around you tighter.

he smirked, a few gentle nibbles to your ear earning a grunt out of you.

“nah, im comfortable.” he chuckled, gently nipping at a portion of your earlobe.

“but do tell me more about what’s up.” milo teased, his smirk broadening as your protests were cut off by his playful affection.

“y-you..” you tried to focus on what you were going to say to him but his kisses distracting you.

“me, and?” he whispered into your ear, a small chuckle escaping him as he kissed your cheek again. milo could feel your body shiver at the sensation, his free hand running up your spine.

“and…? speak up, mami.” you couldn’t speak, even if you wanted to, you melted onto his touch as your mind became hazy from his affection.

a chuckle left him as he could hear your breathing grow heavy. it made his smirk grow wider.

“still nothing? aw….” milo teased in your ear, his voice a low whisper as he landed a soft kiss on your cheek once more

he pulled back enough to look down on her, letting her take in a deep breath before speaking again.

“how about now…?”

“w-what? why did you stop?” you asked with confusion contorting up in your face.

“i never stop for long.” he said.

“now are you gonna talk to me, mami, or should I shut you up and keep going?” milo teased, his smirk growing wider.

“keep going..” you mumbled, lowering your head in embarrassment. damn it, this boy knew how to get to me and now, i couldn’t confront him anymore!

milo chuckled, his hands squeezing more at your waist, keeping you tight against him as he laid another kiss on your ear, cheek and, neck, letting you soak in the feeling of his kisses.

“now, tell me about why you’re upset.” he whispered into your ear, the smell of his cologne bringing a faint sense of security to you, his warm breathe heating the side of your head.

“because..” you couldn’t continue talking as you felt his lips on your neck, kissing the one spot that he knows that makes you go feral.

milo chuckled into your ear, his lips finding the soft flesh of your throat and nibbling at it gently as he ran a hand through your hair.

“you’re so cute when you’re flustered.” he teased, pulling back and giving you a gentle smile as his hand returned to your waist.

“go on..”

“you..” you tried to hold onto something as you felt his euphoric touching all over your body.

“me, what?” milo chuckled, nibbling at your earlobe again.

“you can’t keep me guessing forever, mami.” he said, his hands wrapping around your waist again as his mouth stayed near your ear. his hand cupped your chin and slowly pivoted you to face his gaze.

“come on, say it.” milo teased, pulling away with a smirk. his hand ran from your chin to the side of your face, tilting your head so you can see his smirk.

“what’s bugging you?” he gave you a chance to talk.

“we can’t keep doing this, milo.” you finally managed to let him know.

“i can’t keep doing this.” you said sternly, trying to seem serious.

milo froze for a moment, his eyes widening just a little before he broke into a smile.

“you’re still on about that?” he teased, his eyes twinkling playfully as he looked over your face.

“c’mon, mami. doesn’t my affection make it feel worth it?” he teased, his hand running over her cheek.

“yes but..” you began to melt in his touch again.

“no, no! stop.” you softly smacked his hand away, not wanting to fall for his tricks again. you look away from him, sensing that he may distract you to confront him again.

milo didn’t flinch when you smacked his hand away, a smirk gracing his face. a small chuckle left him as one of his hands wrapped around your waist and pulled you closer.

“that never works, mami.” he said, his breath leaving his mouth warm on your skin as he placed a soft kiss on your shoulder.

“you’ll talk eventually…”

“it’s been almost a month, milo.. i can’t keep doing this to miles..” you said, feeling his chest press against your back as he hugged you from behind.

a small chuckle left him as he kissed your neck again, the feeling of his lips against your skin, making you gasp. his free hand squeezed at your waist gently, caressing you while his other held your hip.

“come on, y/n.. what miles doesn’t know won’t hurt him..” he teased, leaning in near your ear and placing another soft kiss in the center of your ear before stepping back.

“milo.. he’s your brother, for gods sake..” milo only smirked, leaning further in.

“yeah, he’s my brother but..” *he chuckled, his hand on your hip squeezing a bit. he looked into your eyes playfully as he kissed your cheek.

“i liked you first.” he teased as he kissed at the other cheek.

“but i’m his girlfriend..” you mumbled under your breath, feeling disappointed at milo and you.

“dont worry, mami.” milo kissed her once more, pulling back.

“besides, if you didn’t like what we have, you would’ve stopped meeting up with me.” his smirk broadened.

“but you didn’t. you know why?” he teased, his voice dropping low, a teasing grin on his face.

“cause you like it..”

“i… i don’t.” you glared at him, trying to appear as if you hated this.

“you sure bout that, ma?” milo smirked as he moved closer towards you. he pressed up against you a little bit more with his hands trailing down your body, caressing you sensually.

“cause if you really didn’t like this shit, then you would’ve stopped from the very beginning.”

your breath hitched, knowing that milo was fully right about what he said, but before you could deny and protest, he had kissed you to shut you up.

milo’s lips were soft and passionate, his body pressing against yours tightly. he didn’t give you a chance to escape as he kissed you deeply and passionately. his hands were slowly trailing down your body as the feeling of his touch made you weak in the knees. you couldn’t resist him, and he knew it. with his touch, he would make you forget about everything else…

milo smirked in the kiss when he felt your arms snaked up to his neck, pulling him even closer. he continued to kiss you passionately, clearly taking advantage of your weakness, but you didn’t care, you were lost in the moment of the kiss. his lips were soft and tender against yours, and you couldn’t help but savor every bite of it. he took it to another level, deepening the kiss and making it more intense.

he was making sure that you forgot about everything else, and focused only on him…

milo then took your legs, wrapping them around his waist as he carried you to his bedroom as the both of you continued making out. he placed you on the bed, and he was already on top of you, kissing you passionately. his lips were gentle yet firm, as they pressed up against yours. he wasn’t going to stop until he had you completely under his control.

the two of you slowly pulled away to catch your breaths as both you and milo looked into each other’s eyes.

milo looked at you intently, as he brushed his fingers through your hair. his eyes had a knowing look in them, as if he could see right through you. he began to nibble on your neck. his hands were already on your blouse, unbuttoning it slowly.

before milo could even get to the 2nd button, milo’s door had suddenly opened, making both you and milo stop.

“milo, have you seen y/n-“ miles immediately stopped as he saw the scene unfold in front of him.

“what the hell..” miles was in disbelief.

™︎ qkopi | tumblr

[wa-royal-tea]

Previous | Beginning | Next

(Transcript & Translations under the cut & here - Click Pics for HQ Version!)

@thebrixtons​​​

Symphony Manor, Holan (8:30am)

*alarm rings*

Alfie: Good morning, cutie.

Catalina: Mhm, morning.

Alfie: Go back to sleep, it’s still early.

Catalina: Nuh-uh. I’ve been sleeping a lot lately.

*light switch clicks*

Alfie: You should be resting a lot, Lina. You’re still recovering from your injuries.

Catalina: I’m fine. You’re overreacting.

Alfie: Am I though?

Catalina: Yes, you are. It’s been two weeks. I feel better now. I can walk too.

Catalina: And I can do more than walk. If you know what I mean.

Alfie: Tempting, but, I don’t want to take the risk of hurting you. So, I’ll keep my hands to myself until I’m sure you’re fine.

Catalina: Urgh, you suck.

Alfie: *chuckles* Stay in bed. I’ll bring breakfast to you.

Catalina: You’re treating me like a child again.

Alfie: This time, for a good reason. I don’t want you to tire yourself out. And the doctors said that it’s going to take a while before you can make a full recovery.

Alfie: Please listen to me, okay? I don’t want you to get hurt again.

Catalina: *groans* Fine.

Alfie: Good girl.

*door opens and closes*

Tweet 1: an INTRUDER AT THE PALACE ?? fr ?? they got into a whole fight with alfie and #trashlina

Reply to tweet 1: they prob tried to put her in her place💀the bitch deserves it

Reply to tweet 1′s reply: stfu stop being a hater

Tweet 2: I feel sorry for the guests that already arrived. Ppl are dying around the world and they wasted their money on a wedding only for it to be postponed.

Tweet 3: LMAOOO THEY CANCELED THEIR WEDDING !!!! move over #trashlina, its marie’s time to shine ✨

Tweet 4: wait? they postponed their wedding? why?

Reply to tweet 4: the palace hasnt said anything … pelik (weird)

Tweet 5: atp i’m anti-monarchy, because what the hell is even going on?

Tweet 6: idc what everyone else says, i’m standing by alfie and lina 😔 nobody deserves what they’re going through

Tweet 7: how much do u guys wanna bet that they’re lying about the intruder? 👁👁

Reply to tweet 7: i saw a tweet from a former staff and they said nothing even happened … let’s put our tin foil hats on 😬

Reply to tweet 7′s reply: korg ckp ni boleh pakai otak tak? (ppl, can we pls think with our heads for 2 seconds?) stop jumping to conclusions you guys annoy the hell out of me.

Tweet 8: The hate she’s getting rn is unfair. Why’d you guys assume the worse of her?

Reply to tweet 8: Are you fcking fr? Did you forget what she did the other day?

Tweet 8′s OP replies: The apology thingy? You’re mad at her for that? I didn’t realize the marie stans are brain dead when it comes to Lina. She was doing the right thing by apologizing for something she didn’t even do. I bet if it was your fav who did this, you’d be praising her to the skies. Be serious.

*door opens and closes*

Alfie: What are you doing?

Catalina: N-nothing.

Alfie: Are you reading tweets on twister again? Stop reading those. It’s full of shit.

Catalina: I can’t help it. Last week was supposed to be our wedding day but it got postponed because of me.

Alfie: You didn’t ask for this to happen. And those people don’t know what actually happened. They’re just talking out of their asses right now.

Catalina: *sighs* Whatever. It already happened. Did your mum said anything about the wedding date?

Alfie: She said the wedding has been postponed to next month. The latest it would be is in two.

Catalina: But what are we gonna do until then? Don’t tell me you expect me to be in bed everyday?

Alfie: Mum said she’ll give us a new schedule to make up for the tour. She wants us to do joint engagements to build your reputation again. Right now the people are divided in half when it comes to you.

Catalina: Not surprised.

Alfie: Don’t think too much about it. You have me and the others to support you. And this time, if you did mess up, I will tell you. No sugarcoating. But, I won’t be an asshole about it.

Catalina: I’m a bit scared to hear what you’re going to say but thanks for listening to me.

Alfie: It’s no big deal.

Catalina: Oh, I forgot to ask. Did your mum said anything about my assistant? Since, y’know, Rowena’s not really in the picture anymore?

Alfie: She’s considering Anna to be your permanent assistant. The accusations against her has been dropped because Rowena confessed that she lied.

Catalina: Thank god. I liked Anna. I knew she won’t do it.

Alfie: Yeah. I’m just glad Anna still want to work with us. I heard mum said that she was a student Auntie Athy sponsored back in Cordelia. So she’s trusted.

Catalina: Is she a spellcaster like Lucy too?

Alfie: Nope. She’s a normal human. Like us.

Catalina: Oh, that’s cool. But what happens to Rowena now?

Alfie: She’s still under investigation. Your mama thinks it’s impossible for her to work alone. There must be someone helping her out and they’re trying to pry the answers out from her.

Catalina: Hmm...

*phone rings*

Alfie (to the phone): Hello, mum? Yeah, I’m at home.

Alfie: What? Are you serious?

Alfie: I...I see. Okay, I’ll tell her later. Keep me updated. Bye. Take care too.

Catalina: What was it? Did something happen?

Alfie: It’s Rowena.

Catalina: What’s wrong with her?

Alfie: She’s...she’s dead.

[karinasbaby]

okay. phew. this is gonna be a RIDE.

i just wanna start off by saying that the build up and introduction and back story of everything and all the explanation parts are all chefs kiss babe

so starting off with this scene in the airplane

For the next hour, Heeseung looks like he wants to say something to you. The headphones you've brought do well to cancel out the noise, for the most part. You can see from the corner of your eye that he glances at you from time to time, but you ignore it and choose to get comfortable for the long haul.

i can literally imagine his pretty bambi eyes just looking at you and he’s so 🥺 like pls pay attention to him 💔💔 this is literally like that one scene in iland where he’s asking jay & sunoo about whether he looked as cool as hoon or not and they didn’t hear him so he just :( 🥺🥺 stop im making myself emo atp

"You guys looked pretty cozy," Sunoo comments. "It was nice seeing you two like that again." "It felt nice," he mutters. "I really missed her."

sunoo my baby my gorgeous cupid i love you so much and you’re so right i bet they did look so cozy and adorable and cuddly :( also the “i really missed her” stop.

The months spent apart without phone calls or texts were agony. He loathed hearing what you were up to from your mutual friends or when he accidentally watched your Instagram stories. Seeing you happy without him made his heart lurch, not out of possessiveness, but because he wished you were comfortable enough to share those moments with him.

now this whole section genuinely had me so :((??? bcs like just the image of sad pouty hee looking at yn’s instagram stories and being all like :( man. i can picture the heartbreak in his face and i really wish i couldn’t because what the heck :( they both deserve sm better HEE WHY DID U FUMBLE A BAD BITCH⁉️

Heeseung makes a few comments in the conversation as he watches you catch up with Leo's brother and as you facilitate conversation between the rest of the guys. There's a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach when he realizes there's a lot he doesn't know about you.

now this whole thing hit too close to home because that whole sinking feeling of realising that the person u love so much is someone u really don’t know anything about and it’s just 💔💔💔 why must u put me through all of this u genuinely had me staring at my phone like :( for a good two hours during the angsty parts

Heeseung assumed you needed time to heal from the awkward encounter and hadn't reached out to you for a week. He didn't think much of it at the time and hadn't made plans with you until he realized you'd be leaving for Europe the week following. By then, it had been too late, because he stopped by your house the morning after you left.

THIS IS SO?!?¥[%\+]%]+! WHY WOULD U DO THIISSSSS please this really is gut wrenching because like i had to take such a long break after this. the image of both yn & hee looking so heartbroken and defeated and just so lost and sad and dejected and all of these emotions worsening for hee when he shows up at her house and she’s not there oh my god where are there tears on my face

When the room gets too hot, you make your way outside where you're fenced in by a metal barricade. It's cold outside, but the alcohol running through your veins keeps you warm enough that you decide not to go back to ask for a jacket. Heeseung wants to follow you but stays still in his seat when he sees Sunghoon exit the door after you leave.

heeseung when r u gonna stop fumbling my guy. the opportunity was RIGHT THERE. (after further reading i’m very thankful that sunghoon got up first but man was i frustrated when i first read this like >:( ??? you’re STILL fumbling.

“Heeseung was pissed. I saw him looking at me like I'd killed his family, or something. I swore I could see steam coming out of his ears. He wouldn't talk to me for a week because I'd been your first kiss."

jealous hee my favourite type of hee my baby i love angry hee i love for jealous hee i love for hee glaring and literally staring daggers at someone possessive hee <3 jealous hee <3 angry hee <3 mhm. (also sulky hee not talking to hoon for a week my baby :( pls i can’t. he’s so adorable ♡)

this whole part was so heartwarming really had me staring at my phone and bathing in the love that was radiating off my screen like :(( so happy they have their own family and that they feel so close to one another & so comfortable and just— the comfort the love the warmth please this was like a free therapy session (“Heeseung wishes he could hide you in his arms instead.” okay but what about my sanity?)

He hates that he can't read you like he used to. He hates that the other friends know you better than he does, and he hates that he's in the City of Love and he can't call you his girlfriend.

my god i genuinely want to kiss ur mind bcs u making them both forgive eachother and get together and be official in the city of love ur mind. ur mind. it needs to be studied bcs oh my god

"I want to." Heeseung says it out loud for the first time. He wants to work it out with you and get his best friend back in whatever way you'll allow. "I miss her, Jake. I miss being her friend and I fucked up when I rejected her" Heeseung doesn't notice Jake's eyes widen at the sudden admission. Jake had his fair share of theories and considered Heeseung to be his best friend, but even he knew there was a limit about what he was willing to share and what he kept to himself.

just casually tells jake smth he & yn have both been hiding from the group for like 4 years or smth like it’s nothing. you’re so down bad hee so ridiculously down bad it’s actually insane but im so glad he told this to jake and jaeyunie knocked some sense to him where would we be without jake man 🤲

You can't believe you leave Europe in two days as you sip your wine. Jay's father was gracious enough to reach out to his friend at the hotel's restaurant to negotiate having this meal compensated. It's a gesture you hold onto and make a mental note to write a thoughtful note when you settle back in Korea. Jay sits next to you and partakes in the wine activities with you, namely picking out two different bottles to share with the table. Talking to Jay like this makes you feel otherworldly, like you've gotten more experience out of life since you chose to study abroad. You feel lucky, in a sense, that your life has given you more than you expected it too.

jay’s father the man that you are 🙏🏼 thank you for everything you have done for the community and for the whole world 🙏🏼 ngl im very much aware this was a whole hee fic but i can’t help but be so gravitated towards jay bcs the way u wrote him is so so perfect and so manly and attractive like some stuff jay did in this fic had me blushing so much even tho i was supposed to be paying attention to hee but im just a girl :(

That brings a laugh out of you and Heeseung can't help but smile. He doesn't care if it's the alcohol allowing your walls to come down. He's grateful for the chance.

oh heeseung you’re so in love :( please their whole convo had me looking at my phone with straight up heart eyes they’re both so cute stop it right now i wasn’t made to handle this. and the whole “writing down places thingy” is so sweet and thoughtful :( “i wish i could’ve visited you while you were here” YOU SHOULD HAVE.

Heeseung's soul breaks with every crack in your voice and with the way your lips quiver. He sees your mascara beginning to smudge and resists the urge to wipe it away so that your eyes may look fresh and dry. "I'm sorry," he repeats. "I have no excuse."

but you did this… f-for what…? what was the reason??? “heeseung’s soul breaks with every crack in your voice and with the way your lips quiver” okay pack it up shakespeare before i actually bawl my eyes out and i will NOT stop anytime soon.

“Then why did you leave me?" His heart shatters. You've turned away from him in an attempt to walk back to your hotel room. However, Heeseung has learned his lesson. He doesn't let you stray too far and gently tugs your wrist to pull you into his chest and is surprised when you don't fight him off of you. He doesn't care that your tears have stained his shirt or that you're hiccupping into his clothes. All Heeseung wants to do is let you know he's here for you now, despite his past mistakes and clouded judgment. Heeseung loves you for your bravery and vulnerability. He can only hope you understand that.

oh now you’re really dragging me through hell and back with this one :( but CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT 🗣️ HEE HUGGED HER & DIDNT LET HER GET AWAY THIS TIME WE CHEEREEDDD !! that’s all i’m gonna say for this part cuz if i continue i’d cry

“I love who you are and what you believe in. You make the world a better place for everyone around you. How you treated me was a small fraction of why I love you. I love your passions and that you aren't afraid to chase after them. I love that you stick with the same boba order even though you tell yourself you'll try something new. I love that you hate the beach but go with us every time we ask. I love when you get a little drunk because you don't fight me when I want to take care of you." Heeseung swallows. "But mostly, I just really love you."

this whole part— the whole cleaning yn’s make up off and confessing his undying love for her felt so so intimate and raw like oh my goodness the way u write everything when’s ur novel dropping atp because the way you conveyed every emotions and detail this whole scene is so !!! this one is for sure going down in the history book of best hee works. easily a masterpiece. “but mostly, i just really love you.” enough.

“Please don't get over me," Heeseung croaks. His own eyes begin to swell and he forces a choked sob down his throat, aggressively wiping his eyes to rid himself of tears. He presses his forehead against yours. "I don't want you to get over me."

really feeding into my obsession with desperate needy men who aren’t afraid to voice out their emotions instead of having a hard exterior and displaying this harsh outer shell like “his own eyes begin to swell and he forces a choked sob down his throat” but what if i was crying with them as well. u really just- i have no words this is pure art that makes me want to sob “i don’t want you to get over me” that’s never ever gonna happen please :(

Heeseung throws caution out of the window and envelopes you in a hug. He feels your body melt against his and can't help but look at the way you've folded into his chest in the bathroom mirror, with your head in his neck and his cheek on the crown of your head. Heeseung missed holding you like this-with your bodies intertwined as if you were two soulmates who were forced apart upon creation.

again everything. every detail every word ever emotion is written so beautifully like i want to kiss ur fingers atp this is too good to. “with your bodies intertwined as if you were two soulmates who were forced apart upon creation” are u serious. r u joking. is this fr. i had to take a break and stare at my wall for 10 mins because that’s the prettiest and most beautiful way i’ve ever heard someone describe two lovers enough bye

He leans down to kiss your forehead and both of your cheeks repeatedly until your eyes flutter open. Heeseung thinks he could listen to your laugh every morning with the way you wince at the sunlight and how his lips touch your skin. Still, your gaze finds its way to Heeseung's and you can't help but smile.

this whole waking up scene literally made me physically melt in my bed i was so :(( like the way u wrote them and made them so so so in love with one another had me feeling so fuzzy & warm what the heck i love you i love hee i love tides of regret so much help me

“Slept like a baby. I feel like one too." "That's because you are a baby," Heeseung teases, kissing your cheeks and then the tip of your nose. "My baby."

soft hee my beloved. my heart. my angel my soul my dearest love had to take another break because the way u wrote soft hee just made my heart go !!! and i couldn’t handle it. he’s so perfect :(

“I think you two should spend the rest of the day by yourselves," Jay suggests. "We can either meet up for dinner or whenever we have to check out."

i love jay so much. not a lot of stuff i wanted to say for this section but i just wanted to clarify my love for this man. i love jay <3 he’s so sweet and perfect i love him ok i’ll shut up now (but thank u sm for suggesting that they spend the day together)

“God, you and your Superman cape from fourth grade," you snort. "You wore that thing to school everyday. Your dad had to wash it every night otherwise you'd refuse to go to sleep." Heeseung shuts his eyes at the memory.

see now i already have such a huge soft spot for heeseung in general but now you’re killing me and actually ending me with baby / younger hee what made u think i could handle all this pls i have a weak small heart i can’t handle all of this :( the image of baby hee with a superman cape that he refused to take off oh im seeing the pearly gates already

He doesn't say anything. He doesn't need to. Instead, Heeseung grabs your hands and locks his fingers with yours, squeezing three times to tell you he loves you.

🚨 this part right here officer. this exact one right here. attempted murder i’m telling you.

Your heels match well with the dress you've chosen, so much so that Heeseung's jaw drops when his eyes rake over your body. "Wow," he mutters. " Just…wow." "I'm not used to you being speechless," you say mildly, closing the door behind you.

in love heeseung who’s all :0 when he sees his gf’s outfit for their first date and his eyes form hearts i’m about to throw up he’s so cute please “wow” i will kiss you right now.

“I'm so happy you're back in my life." "I'm happy to be in it." Heeseung squeezes your waist. "Deep down, it's always been you that I've loved. There's not a single person who makes me feel the way you do."

you’re out for blood. like genuinely. bcs wdym “it’s always been you that i’ve loved” the tissue box is EMPTY PLEASE.

Heeseung wastes no time and pulls you into him, one arm around your waist and the other behind your neck. His mouth finds yours when he decides he loves the taste of red wine on your lips. It feels poetic to be kissing you for the first time as you're both dressed to the nines in the middle of Paris. To him, kissing you feels like a breath of fresh air and the start of something new. For you, kissing him feels like coming home.

again shakespeare please pack it up and go i can’t do this. this scene is straight out of a movie because the amount of love and affection that’s slapping me across the face from my screen is actually ridiculous you deserve an oscar for this im not even kidding where are your awards??

"Come here," he beckons with his fingers. He attaches his mouth to yours and pushes his tongue inside of your mouth, exploring the warm, wet walls you have to offer. Heeseung decides that he loves the feeling of your tongue against his and lets you suck on the muscle. You take your dress off to reveal sheer panties with nothing else on. Heeseung's jaw drops at your beauty, but he also cannot believe how sexy his best friend's body is. To him, you were sculpted from the hands of Aphrodite herself with great love and care. And it's all for him

:0 ?? no words. genuinely no words. no like seriously i was gasping for breath during this scene and i still am.

"That's it," he encourages. "Does my baby feel good?" You can only nod and he doesn't blame you. "That's a good baby. Fuck, you're so wet, it's driving me crazy."

soft in love hee praising. soft in love hee praising. soft in love hee praising. soft in love hee praising. soft in love hee praising. soft in love hee praising. soft in love hee praising.

Heeseung kisses your wet panties over and over again, his soft lips providing jolts of pleasure. His hands roam around the soft flesh of your thighs and squeezes them as if he remembers you're all his to touch. The feeling is one you want to commit to memory, but it seems like Heeseung knows your mind is working overtime because he reaches his hand to find yours and gives it a reassuring squeeze.

there’s just smth about men kissing eating & licking pussy that just does it for me honestly (heavy on kissing bcs wow you’re in love) and really i had to take a break during this as well because my soul was gone like rereading this now and im dizzy again

"Such a pretty pussy," he says before placing a soft kiss to your clit. He repeats the motion, kissing your folds like they're delicate antiquities that need to be handled with the utmost care. His lips become covered with your essence; he feels you squirm underneath him and uses the expanse of his palms to gently pry your legs open for him, soothing the soft skin of your inner thighs.

??!?!?€#*[>{+]!|¥!|¥$]=\€&£29:

going through it SO BAD.

this whole part. this whole part right here. i was SCREAMING into my pillow. holding and squeezing my plushies for DEAR LIFEEEE

live footage of my reaction to this scene

The man above you lifts your right leg so that he can grip you tighter. You relinquish any control left in your body as Heeseung curses and kisses the side of your ankle. He dips the head of his cock inside and thrusts shallowly as if to tease, but you know he's exploring all the way his cock looks like against your own body.

so by this point i passed away around (approximately) 9 times i think?? and again, im speechless. no words. none at ALL.

“My good girl," he murmurs, eyes locked in at his handy work. “I've never let anyone come inside of me," you say with a fond expression. Your arm comes to brush Heeseung's hair from his face before cradling his cheek when he looks at you in surprise. "Really?" You nod, biting your cheek. "Well, I always knew you were it for me. I didn't want anyone else tainting what's yours." "Mine?" he asks, catching his breath. "You mean it? You're mine." “I'm yours, Hee." "All mine," he mutters to himself in disbelief.

possessive in love soft hee who’s so so so in love and i just— *dreamy sigh* im so dizzy

"But mostly, I just want you to sit on my face. Mad at me? Sit on my face. Sad? Sit on my face. Happy to see me? Sit on my face."

no way you’re also giving us munch hee. possessive in love soft munch hee?? what the hell??????

“Now what do you say, baby? If you ride me until you come, you can blow me in the bathroom before I fuck you in front of the entirety of Paris. Can you do that for me?"

down bad HORRENDOUS. (making fun of him so i can have more time to actually process what the fuck is going on atp) (no because out of all the stories of hee that i’ve ever read— i genuinely felt like this was the most perfect one when it comes to his personality and how he makes love like THIS this right here is EXACTLY how he fucks and no one can tell me otherwise you wrote him PERFECTLY.)

"Okay, we should call the cabs right now so we can get to the airport early," Jay says from behind you."Jay is such a dad," Jungwon whispers.He pays no mind to Jungwon's words, instead focusing on the way Heeseung pulls you into his chest.It warms his heart in ways he can't explain."Congratulations, you two. Let's go home."

i love jay i love jay so much jongseong my beloved i adore you with my whole heart and i love jungwon so so much i love the way you wrote everyone and everything in this story it’s so perfect so well written you never failed to surprise me more with your creativity the further i read there were so so many moments where i was straight up :00??? or just :(( or just :0 (dizzy) i had to take so so many breaks because i couldn’t handle some parts the way you made everything feel so emotional and so intense was so insane i genuinely felt like i was in the story myself. this was straight out of a movie this deserves its own movie adaptation the organisation of all the scenes and the build up and the slow burn literally everything was so so perfect and so perfectly & delicately written i’m so in love. for sure one of my favourite pieces of writing that i’ve ever read in my entire life this was so perfect genuinely can’t process the fact that i read this for FREE josephine oh josephine the writer that you ARE.

u really had me like this throughout the entire story bro

would also like to introduce my greatest discovery — Post Reading Depression where u feel like a whole part of your soul was snatched after reading an absolute godsent masterpiece and now you’re just 🧍‍♀️ because that’s exactly how i feel like right now. i feel EMPTY.

i’m so in love.

hana neither of us are / were prepared istg. i’m gonna need around 12 thousand light years to recover babe.

tides of regret | heeseung

summary: in the year since heeseung first rejected your love confession, you've tried everything to get over him. a trip to europe makes you realize you miss your former best friend more than anything, and it makes heesenug realize he's got it all wrong.

notes: aaand she's here! this is 24.4K words worth of my heart and soul. consider this a token of my appreciation for welcoming me on enhablr. i sincerely hope you enjoy it. <3

warnings: angst/internal self doubt, playful banter, dirty talking, praise, slight degradation, oral (m and f receiving), dry humping, fingering, mentions of exhibitionism and face sitting, nipple sucking, spit, brief moment of anal (tongue only), condom removal, unprotected sex, creampie.

For @enha-stars – may this story rip you apart and stitch you back together.

masterlist

Incheon feels lonely at three in the morning. 

The overhead lights being turned off because of the lack of travelers at this hour makes the airport feel bigger than it actually is. It’s too quiet without the familiar sounds of luggage wheels on the linoleum or overhead speakers announcing flight changes every ten minutes. You don’t think you’ve ever been to an airport so early in your life. 

It’s quiet enough to leave you alone with your bothersome thoughts. In the years you’ve been away from home as you studied abroad, you can’t help but feel a gravitational pull towards life in Seoul and the people in it. The familiarity of your home outweighs the adventure you once yearned for in your youth, and now you’re left with the exciting notion that, this time, you’ll know when you’ll be coming back.

The terminal has an abundance of seating. Your backpack rests on the seat beside you as Jay double checks the gate number while the rest of your friends find a spot on the seats next to you, attempting to find an ounce of comfort in the dimly lit area.

“I know leaving early saved us hundreds of dollars, but I need sleep,” Sunghoon says from beside you. His usually well kept hair falls in all sorts of places like he woke up without a second thought and hailed a taxi the minute he opened his eyes. 

“You’ll thank me later,” Jay says. “We can sleep on the plane.”

“Our flight doesn’t leave for another two hours,” Jake whines from beside him as he yawns. “How am I supposed to sleep on these god forsakes chairs?” 

“Quit whining and try,” Jay retorts. He looks behind him to see the rest of your friend group approach before glancing over to you. “Doing okay?” 

“How come Y/N gets preferential treatment?” Jake beckons. 

“Because she isn’t a nuisance like you,” Jay immediately fires back before diverting his attention towards you again. 

“I’m alright,” you say, stifling a yawn behind your hand. “Just cold and sleepy.” 

“Hopefully they turn off the damn AC,” Sunghoon says as he pulls his sweatshirt over his head. “I feel like my veins are being injected with ice.”

“It’ll warm up when more people come,” Jay reasons. “I wish there was a coffee stand that was open. I need a cup.” 

“I could go for one,” you agree. “I’m trying to stay awake for the next couple of hours so I can sleep on the plane.” 

The rest of your friend group appear behind Jay and you look down to check your phone for any notifications when Heeseung catches your eye. It takes you by surprise and you abruptly look back at your screen and busy yourself by aimlessly scrolling through social media as he attempts to occupy the empty seat beside you, but Jake beats him to it.

“I’m gonna freeze to death and then all of you are gonna have to deal with my frozen body.” Jake dramatically slouches down onto the seat until his head finds your shoulder, nuzzling his cheek as if trying to find comfort in you. “Jesus, Y/N, you’re so warm.”

You laugh. “I wore layers.” 

“You’re gonna regret that when we get on the plane,” Jake mumbles. 

Heeseung, from the corner of your eyes, opts to move to the seats in front of you. You try not to pay him any mind.

You snort. “Yeah, well I can take these layers off while you freeze until you become an icicle.” Jake hums when you let your head fall onto his. 

“You know I’m not built for the cold. Australia’s my home.”

“And yet you moved to Korea,” Sunghoon provokes. 

Jungwon and Riki are rummaging through the bag of snacks you’d brought for an early breakfast until the restaurants and coffee stands around you open up. Jake’s right, it’s far too cold to stop shivering, but you suppose you’re grateful that the discomfort distracts you from sleeping too early. 

“I can’t believe we’re finally going on this trip,” Sunoo says from above you. With your head still on Jake’s, you turn to look at the boy speaking. “I’m really excited for you to show us where you’ve been for the past four years.”

A tiny smile graces your lips. “I’m excited to show you around London and Paris. The latter is a two hour train ride. My friends and I would go every few weekends or so to explore the city. Pictures and videos don’t do them justice.” You sigh as you reminisce. “I really did think that I’d end up living there when I graduated.” 

“Why didn’t you?” 

“Missed home too much, I guess.” You shrug. “Though, I can’t believe Riki went through a growth spurt in the last two years that I was gone.”

“You went back to Okayama before Y/N came back for holiday break, right?” Jungwon asks, looking between the both of you.

“That’s right,” Riki says. “I was sad that I couldn’t see you before you went back to school.”

“Now he’s twice my height.” You gesture at the younger boy. He’s too shy with the sudden affection and chooses to bury his head in Jungwon’s shoulder. “You were so little.”

“Shut up,” he mumbles. 

“I can’t believe you’re fluent in English now.” Jungwon pushes Riki off of his arm. “You, Jake, and Jay are kind of scary when you speak English.”

“It was a little hard at first. I used to watch a lot of American cinema so I could understand it better than I could speak it. But I can’t lie, it’s fun being able to talk to them in English.”

“You were so cute trying to string phrases together during your first summer back,” Jay coos. “Texting her in English was funny because she couldn’t understand the difference between spelling.”

“Poor Jake.” You pull your head from his and look down at him. “You probably had aneurysms looking at my grammar.” 

You lift your head to see that the aforementioned has fallen asleep amongst the conversation with his mouth slightly ajar and soft snores echoing past your ear. You don’t move when Jay asks if you want Jake off of your shoulder, but you shake your head.

Conversation falls flat when the group unanimously decides that sleepiness is overtaking the need to socialize. Jay keeps checking his watch to look out for the time while your eyes try to look anywhere but at Heeseung. 

It’s odd, the way two people can lose a friendship overnight. The heartbreak that came with romantic rejection wasn’t nearly as bad as realizing texts and phone calls were far fewer in between the moment you had arrived back in Europe to finish your studies. It hurt to know that neither one of you felt comfortable enough to see each other when you were back in your hometown unless the two of you were invited to hang out with mutual friends. 

Still, seeing Heeseung after he had rejected your confession felt like a punch to the gut. 

Long gone were the days of being able to send him unimportant updates about your life abroad or what you were doing at any given summer day back home. You couldn’t ask him to go to the restaurants you used to frequent near his house or yours. You certainly couldn’t call him at random hours because you were bored and missed his voice. 

It wasn’t for the lack of trying. It felt like things might've gone back to normal after a short period of not talking, but your texts going unanswered and your calls going to voicemail was all you needed to know. 

Perhaps it’s why you’re comfortable spearheading this vacation with Jay, who had made it a point to visit you in London when you’d chosen to stay behind instead of going home for the holiday break. The two of you had never spent time alone prior to then, but it touched you that he’d go out of his way to dedicate an entire day to visit you when he was there for a family vacation. 

Coming back to Korea the summer after graduating felt like you were making the right choice, even if your head was telling you to find a home in Europe. Still fresh from your unresolved rejection, stepping off of the plane and knowing you wouldn’t be returning back to your university’s town made the uncomfortable reality of coming face-to-face with Heeseung sink in. You’d have to live with the consequences. 

But it’s been eight months since you returned, six months since Jay’s dad was gracious enough to offer you a position on his marketing team, and five months since he encouraged your entire friend group to take a trip to your old stomping grounds. 

The proposition felt too sudden, especially with how little experience you had working with his team, but you’d spend an evening with the Park family for him to consider you an honorary member. Though, you’re sure Jay might’ve told him something happened between you and Heeseung, especially after telling everyone you wouldn’t be coming home for the holidays. 

To this day, you haven’t uttered a single word to your friends about what happened the night Heeseung rejected your love confession. If you know him as well as you think you do, you don’t think he's told anyone either. 

“Cafes are opening up,” Jay notes. Sunghoon’s ears perk up. “Three of us should go get food and drinks while the rest save our seats.” 

The airport overhead lights must’ve turned on while you were deep in thought. Jay’s right, the coffee stands have opened and it’s likely due to the new influx of travelers who’ve arrived at the airport. Foot traffic is still light and you know Jay wants to get ahead of the crowd. 

Jake has woken up because of the growing murmur around him and lifts himself off of your head to wipe the sleep out of his eyes. He yawns once more but tries his best not to fall asleep again.

“How long was I out?”

“Twenty minutes, give or take,” Sunghoon answers.

“Sorry for sleeping on you,” Jake apologizes. 

“It’s okay. You needed it.” He scrunches his face, not used to the new lighting. “Jay, I’ll come with you to get coffee. I need to stretch my legs.” 

“I’ll help as well.” Heeseung speaks for the first time in a while and his voice nearly catches you off guard. 

“Sure.” Jay gathers everybody’s orders before the two of you follow him around the terminal. 

The line isn’t unbearably long, but with Heeseung towering behind you, it feels like you’ve been standing for hours. You shift from one foot to the other in order to find a happy medium to no avail. Jay orders for the group and you pay attention to him more than you care to when you realize Heeseung is now standing beside you to make room for more people to wait in line. He’s considerate like that and you hate it. 

When the baristas are finished with your order, you reach for the bag of sandwiches in your haste to escape Heeseung. But your fingers touch the steam and you drop the bag into the counter with a hiss.

“Careful,” Heeseung says. “Don’t get hurt, please.” 

Your clumsy nature was always something he teased you for. Heeseung sounds so sincere about his worry that you think you’d rather him pour all of the hot coffee on you instead. 

“Thanks.” You grab the bag with so much as a single moment of eye contact before realizing Jay has started walking back. 

Breakfast is eaten in silence. Everyone is too tired to speak, save for Jake whose twenty minute nap has rendered him a little more awake than the rest of you. You and Sunghoon share your egg sandwich and chocolate croissant respectively without a word spoken between the two of you. 

Meanwhile, Heeseung is staring at the way your thighs are close to Sunghoon’s. He had shifted his body closer to yours in order to form a makeshift table so that sharing pastries wouldn’t result in crumbs on the floor. You can feel Heeseung's gaze on your kneecap and it makes your face flush. 

Sunoo and Jake offer to throw everybody’s trash away when you’re all done eating. The airport is in full swing by now and everyone has said their graces and apologized to Jay for giving him a hard time with how early they arrived. 

It seems that sleep has threatened to overtake you. You’re waiting in line to scan your plane ticket and board the aircraft, but the sudden warmth of the airport has caused you to yawn a few too many times. Riki’s standing in front of you and his height makes for a perfect makeshift wall to lean on. Or, that’s what your tired brain is telling you, because you slouch forward and let your cheek rest against his back as you close your eyes. 

“Sleepy girl,” you hear him chuckle. You merely nod in acknowledgement. 

Your comfort is short lived when he softly nudges you because the line has moved. Soon, you scan your ticket and give the airline agent a smile as thanks before waiting to set foot on the aircraft. 

Sunghoon notices your dropped shoulders and wordlessly takes your backpack off of you. 

“You don’t need to do that,” you say with a frown when you see Sunghoon carrying your belongings with him. 

“Let me hold it,” says Sunghoon. “You look like you’re about to fall over with the extra weight.” 

“If you insist.”

“Let us take care of you, yeah?” Jay interrupts, bumps his shoulder with yours. “You’ve been running all over Europe these past four years and we’ve only seen you a handful of times. You deserve to relax on this trip.” 

“I can’t believe you guys are being so sweet on me. I know that’s ending the second we get back to Korea.” 

The two boys laugh. “Well, it’s only fair, I guess. You’re like, the mom friend.”

“Jay is the mom friend.” The aforementioned doesn’t argue. 

The squeeze of the aircraft is tight and you’re desperately trying to look for your seat. It seems that Sunghoon is sitting in your row, which excites you, but you’ve come to realize that you’ve obtained the ungodly middle seat. You make peace with it for a brief moment before Heeseung clears his throat awkwardly.

“Let’s switch seats,” he says from behind you. His ticket shows the window seat right next to yours. “I know you hate middle seats.” 

“No, I couldn’t ask that of you.” 

“You’re not asking.” He says it with a smile and it makes you cower into yourself. “You should move to your new seat so we don’t hold up the line.” 

Heeseung suggests it in a way that is reminiscent of the days where he’d give up his sweet treats because you wanted a taste. It tugs at your heartstrings but you don’t have time to think about that when you notice how the plane is starting to fill up. 

Reluctantly, you slide into the window seat while Heeseung and Sunghoon follow suit. Your seat belts are buckled and in no time, the aircraft takes flight. 

For the next hour, Heeseung looks like he wants to say something to you. The headphones you've brought do well to cancel out the noise, for the most part. You can see from the corner of your eye that he glances at you from time to time, but you ignore it and choose to get comfortable for the long haul. 

When you notice the flight attendants come with the beverage cart, you take it as a cue to get comfortable and try to get some sleep for the next few hours. Likely due to the lack of sleep from the night prior, you fall asleep as soon as your head rests against the plane.

You don’t hear Heeseung requesting an extra bottle of water for you.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

When you come to, you’re barely able to register that it’s time to eat the first meal on the flight. You take your headphones off and put it in your backpack as you blink the sleep out of your eyes. 

“Chicken or beef?” 

Heeseung looks at you, expecting an answer.

“Hm?”

He laughs softly. “Chicken or beef?” 

Your eyes dart between him and the flight attendants when you realize they’re about to approach.

“I heard them asking people which meal they want,” Heeseung explains. “So, chicken or beef?”

“Beef.” You clear your throat. 

“Beef it is.”

Sunghoon requests chicken when the flight attendant arrives. Heeseung orders beef for the both of you before you get the chance. If he notices you looking at him strangely, he doesn’t comment on it. 

The food comes quicker than expected and the meal tastes decent, though you’re trying your best not to elbow Heeseung as you cut away at your portion. He seems engrossed in the movie in front of him while you peek at what he’s watching—Iron Man, to no one’s shock. 

You soften a bit at the nostalgia that comes with Heeseung and Marvel, namely the rainy days in your youth spent marathoning the superhero movies. There had been one year in high school when he’d dressed up as Tony Stark and you as Pepper Potts despite a few girls your age whispering behind your back at the matching costumes out of jealousy. You don’t think you can think of the franchise without thinking of Heeseung. 

The memories almost bring a smile to your face. Heeseung seems to notice you glancing at his screen in between bites. You avoid eye contact when you realize he caught you staring and focus on cutting your meal, praying that Heeseung will stop looking at you and watch the movie instead. 

But he takes one earbud out and holds it to you. 

“Do you want to watch it with me?” He’s halfway through. You tell him such but he doesn’t care. 

“I don’t want to jump in halfway through.” 

“Come on, it’s not like you haven’t done that before.” 

Heeseung says it with such nonchalance that it makes your stomach drop. He sees the way your eyes falter for a moment and the way you glance between his hand and the screen. You try to come up with excuses to refuse his offer, but you’ve got eight more hours until you land.

“Sure,” you settle. Heeseung gives you one headphone and resumes watching.

Between the meals being picked up and tray tables being put away, you manage to fall asleep in your seat. Sunoo sits in front of you and upon coming back from a quick bathroom trip, sees your head resting on Heeseung’s shoulder with his cheek propped on your head. The two of you are fast asleep despite the credits rolling and he can’t help but snap a quick photo. 

You wake up some hours later when Sunghoon says your name. The cabin lights turning on temporarily blinds your vision as you wake up when you realize you’d managed to push yourself back enough to rest yourself against Heeseung’s arm. 

“Oh God,” you say in shock, pulling yourself and the seat upright. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.”

“It’s okay,” he replies, like he means it. “Sleeping on planes is uncomfortable. But I know you know that.” 

You nod. “Yeah. It's too hard to get comfortable.”

“I can’t believe we’re spending two weeks in Europe. I’ve never been outside of Korea and Japan before. You’ll have to help me with my English.”

“Jay or Jake can also help with that.” You say it with a yawn and Heeseung’s eyes cast to the floor for a brief moment. You barely notice, gathering your own belongings as the flight descends. 

“Yeah, I guess they can.” 

When you land, the familiar disorientation of the time difference truly wakes you up. It’s eleven in the morning when the plane door finally opens and Jay’s moving a step ahead of you as he occupies space in the aisle way to grab his belongings. You follow suit and wait for your turn to exit amongst your friends and other travel goers.

Stepping out of the plane and into the familiar terrain of the Heathrow Airport reignites your attentiveness and you smile at the fond memories of being greeted by your university friends upon arriving. The familiar atmosphere of English travelers milling around the gate warms your chest with nostalgia. 

You wait for the boys to emerge before signaling Jay, who follows beside you as you walk towards the baggage claim area. You lead him with little trouble down the escalator as the rest of your friends follow suit, yawning in an attempt to wake themselves up. 

“It’s weird seeing you in your element,” Jay comments as he stands beside you, periodically checking the turnstile for his luggage. “A good kind of weird.” 

“This airport might as well be my second home,” you tell him. “It feels routine to wait for my luggage at this point.”

“I’m tempted to sleep when we get to the hotel but I don’t want to mess up my sleep schedule more than it already is.” Jay pulls his luggage. 

“Yeah, that’s smart. I think we should take an hour to freshen up and find a place to eat before we go exploring.”

“I can already hear Jake whining about it.” 

The two of you share a laugh. “He’ll just have to get used to it. We can have an early night and rest up before we explore tomorrow.” 

“He slept on the plane, for the most part,” Jay informs. “Surprisingly, he didn’t snore as loudly as he usually does.” He spots your luggage and takes it off of the belt for you. 

On the other side of the carousel, Heeseung and Sunoo are standing together to find their own luggages. 

“You guys looked pretty cozy,” Sunoo comments. “It was nice seeing you two like that again.”

“It felt nice,” he mutters. “I really missed her.” 

Heeseung doesn’t have to tell Sunoo what happened between the two of you for him to know that you two aren’t as close as you used to be. The older boy feels nearly ashamed that his own friends have caught up on his awkward demeanor.

“Well, she’s back for good and we’re here on vacation. Try not to dwell on whatever it is that’s making you think too hard.”

Heeeung laughs. “I’ll try, Sunoo. It’s just hard when we’re not as close. How can I compete when we’re in her college town and how will I talk to her in Paris?”

“Well, you never know,” Sunoo says as he picks up his luggage. “Anything can happen in the City of Love.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The hotel itself is modest in size. Quaint, old cobblestone surrounding the entryway like you remember it. The people are busy walking in and out of the meeting rooms in the lobby as you walk to the concierge to sort out the rooming situation. Jay stands beside to help distribute the keys and the employee behind the desk bids you a good stay. 

The view from the fifth floor is spectacular already. You catch glimpses of the streets of London below you, street lights decorating the sidewalk and flowers surrounding the city. This feels like the London you remember and it adds a slight pep in your step. 

“Alright, it’s decided that three of you are gonna share,” you say as you reach the first room. “The other four will be split into two rooms and I’ll get a room for myself.”

“That’s not fair,” Jake huffs. 

“I refuse to share a room with any of you.” You pocket the key to the single bedroom. “Plus, Jay’s mom helped me make the arrangements when we planned the trip.”

“Favoritism,” Jake coughs. You nudge his side.

“To make it fair, everyone will pick up a key card without knowing the room number and flip it. That’ll determine who you room with.”

“Alright,” Jungwon says. “Fair enough.”

One by one, your friends pick their key cards and discover their roommates. Jake, Sunoo, and Riki are the unlucky three who will be rooming together for the duration of the week. Jay and Sunghoon are in the room directly across from theirs while Heeseung and Jungwon share a room. 

“Let’s meet at the lobby in an hour,” Jay suggests. “We can get some lunch and do some exploring before deciding on dinner.”

“We can take it easy and sleep early tonight,” you add in. “I know that flying internationally is always a bitch and I try to time my sleep when I need to.”

The eight of you part ways. Your suite has a beautiful view of the sky and the room itself makes you feel like the main character of a romance film. The bed is just to your liking with pillows stacked to the nines. It feels nice to have a moment to yourself. With your friend Yunjin backing out of the trip at the last minute due to family conflicts, you hadn’t had time to think about anything other than arriving at the hotel safely. 

You busy yourself with a shower and freshen up, pulling out options for you to wear for the rest of the night. You settle with something stylish yet comfortable and put enough makeup on your face until you’re satisfied with the person staring back at you in the bathroom mirror. 

True to your word, you enter the lobby when you said you would. Jay and Sunghoon are already downstairs by the seats. Sunghoon stands to offer you the loveseat but you decline politely and sift through your phone until the rest of the guys arrive. 

When they do, it’s like all eight of you collectively agree that hunger has overtaken you. You know of a nearby cafe that serves sandwiches from your days in university. You lead them to the quaint restaurant that has your friends staring at the art on the walls as you greet the cashier and order. 

It’s a slow moment for the eight of you as you all eat in relative silence, the sound of quiet slurping audible from the coffees everyone has chosen to drink. 

“Did you spend a lot of time here?” Jungwon asks. 

“Around the area, yeah,” you say, looking around. The outdoor seating area is just towards the edge of the street with the weather being a cool, cloudy day. “I loved coming to cafe’s like these with my friends after class. We’d study until they kicked us out and then go for a drink or two.” 

“We should go to a pub while we’re here,” Jake suggests. “I’ve always wanted to see an English pub. We have a few back in Australia.” 

“I know just the place! My friend’s brother owns it and they know I’ll be in town for the next week. It would be nice to catch up with them.” 

“Hopefully your friends here kept you out of trouble,” Sunghoon teases. You flick him with your fingers. 

“I’m the most responsible one out of you seven and don’t you forget that.” 

“Do you miss being here now that you’re back?” Riki asks in between sandwich bites. “God, I love London already.” 

“You’re going to choke if you don’t slow down.” He apologies and takes a single bite. “Well, I think I miss my friends a lot. I don’t necessarily miss being in university, but I miss the freedoms that come with it.”

“I still can’t believe you spent four years of your life here,” Sunghoon says. “That’s insane when you think about how you cried when your aunt took you to Tokyo for a week when you were in middle school.”

The boys laugh and you frown. “I was twelve, okay? You wound me. But yeah, I think I grew out of my shell in high school and had this urge to travel but didn’t know how to do it. I was surprised when my parents encouraged me to apply to King’s College, even more so when I got accepted.”

“You’ve always been too good to stay in one place for too long,” Jake says. “We got close until halfway through our first year of high school, I think. I always got the sense that you wanted more than what our hometown could offer.” 

“I always wanted to move to the heart of Seoul eventually. But I think I needed to come here in order to figure that out.”

“Would you really have stayed in London if you had the chance?” 

You avoid looking at Heeseung, whose attention averted from his phone to you. 

“I don’t know,” you say honestly. “But what I do know is that I’m happy to be back in Korea and I’m happy to be traveling to Europe.” 

“You always did have that sense of adventure,” Heeseung says. “I remember you were the one who always got us in trouble when we explored a little too far.” 

“Your mom was pissed that time I walked a little too far down the shoreline when we went to Jeju.” The memory feels warm despite your discomfort at having Heeseung’s eyes on you. “I didn’t know who she wanted to kill more, me or you.”

“Definitely me. You could do no wrong in her eyes.”

“What happened?” Sunoo asks. 

“My family and Heeseung’s took a trip to Jeju Island when we were around seven, if I remember correctly. I’d taken swimming lessons and thought I could show off my new skills at the beach we were at, but there was a wave that was a bit too much for me to handle.”

“She was nearly swallowed by the ocean.” Heeseung hits his knee with his palm as he recalls the memory. “I mean, I was seven and it seemed like the wave was gigantic but to my mom, it must’ve been just tall enough that she could see over it.”

“She yelled at him for the rest of the night because she had to pull me out from under the water,” you add. “I was fine. My parents laughed it off but his mom was so pissed at him for not telling me to come back to the shore.”

Echoes of laughter fill the space. It feels nice to be able to laugh like this with Heeseung, temporarily forgetting why you were so awkward around him in the first place. 

When the check is paid, you lead the group around the area. Sunghoon takes out his camera and captures everything that inspires him while Sunoo and Riki are off to explore the shops around. It brings warmth to your chest to see your friends enthusiastically exploring the space you once called home. It had been a dream of yours since Jay came to visit and let you drag him around town for the day. Having them with you feels like you’re healing a part of yourself. 

You duck into the quiet bookstore you used to frequent while you were a student. Filled with novels and trinkets from floor to ceiling, it feels familiar to you. 

You get lost in thought when you glance at the books in front of you and you don’t notice Heeseung approaching. 

“Still love books?” 

“Jesus,” you gasp, clutching your chest. “You scared me.”

“Sorry,” he laughs. “Seems like you still scare easily.” You hate that he knows you so well. Clearing your throat, you put the book back. 

“Yes, to both. I used to come to this bookstore a lot when I had free time.” 

He looks around. “It looks like a nice place.”

“They have a reading nook in the back. The owner is this sweet older woman who was the first person to help me with my English when I first moved. I think she let me read books for free because I used to bring her sweets.”

“That sounds like something you’d do.” You cast your eyes to the floor. “It’s crazy that there’s parts of you that I don’t know.” 

“Yeah,” you mumble solemnly. Heeseung’s eyes bore into the side of your face as you pretend to look at the titles of the books. 

“Do you talk to your college friends often?” 

“All the time. My closest friends live all over the place. Two of them are from the area, one went to live in the States, and a few live in Busan.”

“I’ll bet it was nice to have some Korean friends when you moved. I remember you used call me to tell me about your first semester here.” 

You can’t help but think about the first few months after you moved when you would call Heeseung for a bit of comfort when things felt too overwhelming. With Korea being nine hours ahead, you always felt a little too bothersome phoning when it was the middle of the night for him, not used to the time difference. But he always answered you or called back when he had the chance. 

You’d spend hours on the phone, talking to him about how difficult it was to learn English and how making friends was not as easy as you thought it would be. Navigating the city felt lonely and isolating because you’d barely made friends in your classes in the first few weeks. Heeseung was there through all of it, reminding you that being eighteen years old in a new country made you brave despite feeling like you were a failure for not grasping a hold on life like you thought you would. 

Falling asleep on the phone with him became a routine, too. Whether it was you who fell asleep after a long day or Heeseung, who had stayed up listening to your worries, the sound of his breathing made it feel like you were back home in Korea instead of exploring a grand new world. 

Soon enough, you could talk your way around and piece together conversations with your classmates until you’d found friends who shared similar interests. Heeseung was the first person you told and the first person to tell you how proud he was that you extended your roots to learn about yourself away from home. You always thrived off of his praise as if making him proud was something you never sought out to do, but appreciated when it happened.

But that was four years ago. Whatever friendship you had with him then is not the one you have with him now. 

“It was nice,” you settle. “I miss my college friends. You might get to meet some later in the week.” 

“Nice,” he mutters to himself when you walk past him. “That’s really nice.” 

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The rest of the week is spent in your old stomping grounds, from touring your campus, to shopping, to sightseeing. The eight of you split up more often than not to explore different areas based on mutual interest. You find that Heeseung tends to gravitate towards you and you aren’t sure if it’s because he feels guilty for rejecting you or because he genuinely wants to explore what you want to do. 

Still though, at least one other person joins you. It feels nice to have a buffer to avoid any awkward conversation or moments, especially when Heeseung trips over his words trying to talk to you. 

The week goes by too quickly for your liking. Spending time in London has felt like coming back home, in a way. You’ll always have your memories here and this city will remain the same when you return in the future. Now, it no longer feels like the place you escape too because things got too hard back home. 

Even with Heeseung next to you more often than not, you’ve found a happy medium The awkwardness dissipates when you set aside your indifference to show everybody your favorite places, watching them explore the city for themselves. 

As expected, Riki and Jake have spent a little too much on clothing with the hopes that they can fit it into their luggage on the way back. It fits miraculously. 

Your friend Leo, the one whose brother owns the pub you used to frequent, tells you he’s excited to see you after all these months. It’s a Friday night when you arrive, seeing it well populated. But it’s rather early in the evening before the rush hour, so you enjoy the relative quietness before people rush in. 

Heeseung, on the other hand, has been in a stupor for the latter half of the week. It began when he managed to talk to you in the bookstore, but blossomed when he watched you navigate your way around the city. You barely looked at your phone for directions and had no problem switching to English when you greeted shop owners. Hearing you speak fluently in a language you once struggled with in your childhood made him feel somewhat removed from your life. The two of you used to joke that he was always better with English. Now, the tables have turned. 

The fear that you’d told your school friends about what transpired between the two of you plants itself in the back of Heeseung’s mind. He worries that your friends won’t like him and that you’ve scorned his name, but he chides himself just as much as he worries because he knows you and how deeply you care about people. 

Heeseung wishes he could go back in time to change what happened. He wishes that he’d admit his mistake and confess to you before you left. It had taken him a long time to confront his own feelings, but seeing you back in Korea made him realize he didn’t care if the relationship was long distance or not. He didn’t care as long as you were in his life. 

The months spent apart without phone calls or texts were agony. He loathed hearing what you were up to from your mutual friends or when he accidentally watched your Instagram stories. Seeing you happy without him made his heart lurch, not out of possessiveness, but because he wished you were comfortable enough to share those moments with him. 

To boil it down, Heeseung hopes this trip can undo a year’s worth of his ignorance. 

But before he can think about that, your exclamation pulls him towards a strange man before you. 

“Leo!” 

The sheer volume of your voice doesn’t go unnoticed by Heeseung, who eyes the bloke the second you make a dash for him. His heart winces when your arms wrap around the stranger’s neck and as he spins you around, squeezing you for good measure. He isn’t pleased when Leo settles to let his arm rest around your waist instead of letting you go. He’s even less so when you don’t attempt to separate yourself from him. 

“Hey, pretty girl,” Leo says with a boyish grin, accent making Heeseung nearly roll his eyes. 

“This is Leo.” You let your head rest on his shoulder for a brief moment. “He’s one of my friends from university. I think we met in, what, second year?” 

“Second year, auditing class with Professor Donahue on Mondays and Wednesdays,” he says. “God, that class was so boring.” 

“He’s the friend whose brother owns the bar,” you explain to them. You introduce Leo to each friend respectively. “Jay and Jake are my friends who are fluent in English.” 

“You can speak it and understand it as well, right?” Leo asks as he shakes Heeseung’s hand.

He nods while giving him a tight smile. “Just a little. I’m practicing.” 

“Nah, you sound perfect already.”

Heeseung feels indifferent to see you in your element with people from your past. The bartender, who is Leo’s brother, tells you the first two rounds are on the house after he checks IDs. Riki and Jungwon are excited to have their first pub experience after you make them promise to take it slow and drink lots of water in between. 

“It’s a bit weird seeing her be like that,” Leo says to Jay with a laugh. “When we first got to know each other, it was me who had to tell her to watch how much she drank.”

“Y/N, drinking?” Jake asks. “No way. Back in Korea, she got drunk maybe twice a year.” 

“She and a mutual friend, Elizabeth, were as thick as thieves. They were like a package deal before we all graduated and until she moved to the States. They’d always go a little too hard after exam season was over or if people invited them out on a Saturday night.”

“Y/N’s always been the responsible one out of the bunch,” Jay adds. “In high school, there was one time she got so drunk that she nearly scaled the roof of my friend’s house. Heeseung nearly fell off trying to get her down. After that, she swore off alcohol.” 

Heeseung makes a few comments in the conversation as he watches you catch up with Leo’s brother and as you facilitate conversation between the rest of the guys. There’s a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach when he realizes there’s a lot he doesn’t know about you. 

The two of you talked less as you became more comfortable in your environment. At first, Heeseung took it to heart and made the assumption that you’d chosen your friends in England over him, but a stern conversation with his mother made him realize he was being juvenile. He could only comfort you so much when he was oceans away. It was probably a good thing that you were talking to him less because that must’ve meant you were as overwhelmed or scared like you were when you first moved to England. 

You’d still call him a few times a week before bed–when Heeseung was getting ready for the day–to update him on everything that happened in the past week. You two texted more frequently than you conversed, sending him pictures of new places you’d discovered or him sending photos of your mutual friends with sad faces at the notion of you not being able to be there with them. 

Heeseung had always felt a bit jealous of your time abroad. He loved Korea, but he yearned for the same sense of adventure you once had. Only, he hadn’t figured it out until halfway through university when it was too late to transfer or apply for a semester abroad. When Jay had proposed this trip and that his father would expense half of it, he jumped at the opportunity to go. 

Although, he didn’t know it would hurt him this much.

Hearing you talk about your life here made him feel like it was his fault that he barely knew your life in England. It was so easy when the two of you lived a few blocks from each other; he’d run into you with your other friends on the street or know exactly where you were likely to be at any given moment. He knew you felt the same way about him too, as you always knew where to find him if you really needed him. 

But it feels like this is the first time he’s seeing you for who you are as an adult, not the child that he grew up with. 

Surely, Heeseung always knew you had a good head on your shoulders. You were always the more outspoken one who stood up for what you believed in, no matter how big or small. You never backed down if someone was giving you a hard time and it was one of the reasons why Heeseung had struck up a conversation with you as you two played in the sandbox after a few kids had stolen the toys he was playing with. That sense of responsibility and gratuity followed you into your adolescent and teenage years, too. Not once had Heeseung heard anyone say a bad word about your character. He’d like to think he had something to do with it, but deep down, Heeseung knows it was all you. 

When you confessed nearly a year ago, Heeseung felt like his heart might’ve ceased to function properly. Truth be told, he’s never taken his daydreams about being your boyfriend too seriously. He always wondered if it was normal to develop small crushes on your girl-friends at a young age and wondered if those butterflies in his stomach was because of how often his other friends at school would playfully tease him until they stopped. Jake and Sunghoon had been people who teased him for having a girl as his best friend until they befriended you too, and Heeseung was satisfied when they stopped with their comments. They, too, could understand why Heeseung was so keen on keeping you around. 

But the butterflies never quite left him. Your smile was too bright. Your voice was too angelic. Everything about you and how you fit into his life felt a little too perfect; Heeseung hated cliches in his youth and this felt like one big cliche joke. He knew his mother didn’t approve of the girls she’d see him with, even in college when he got into his first serious relationship. She wasn’t as enthusiastic about her as she was with you. At the time, the frustration seemed too biased until it ended in a way that made Heeseung realize his mother truly knew what was best for him.

Heeseung never considered the possibility of dating you until you confessed your feelings for him. 

As much as he plays off being the spontaneous, go-with-the-flow type of person, Heeseung gets scared when things go unplanned. He backs away from courage and from moments that make or break his character. He likes to play it safe unless he can make a calculated risk in his favor, choosing to let others fall flat on their face and learn from their mistakes. Heeseung had never considered the possibility of you having feelings for him either. That fateful summer night is one he will always remember, especially in the way the light in your eyes dimmed when he told you he didn’t feel the same. 

He remembers your quick apologies and the way you backed away too quickly for his liking. He had tried to reach for your hand to tell you it was okay and that he didn’t feel awkward about it, but you’d shook your head and merely told him you’d see him later. Heeseung had never seen you leave so abruptly. But he figured you’d get over it, as you typically do when things don’t go your way. You’re resilient like that.

Heeseung assumed you needed time to heal from the awkward encounter and hadn’t reached out to you for a week. He didn’t think much of it at the time and hadn’t made plans with you until he realized you’d be leaving for Europe the week following. By then, it had been too late, because he stopped by your house the morning after you left. 

Getting together with Seulgi after you left felt too easy. He knew she’d always had a thing for him but brushed her off for reasons he couldn’t fathom until he bumped into her a few weeks after you’d left without so much as a text or a voicemail. Feeling a bit irritated at your wordless departure, Heeseung took Seulgi out on a few days to take his mind off of you.

Except, it didn’t work. Heeseung found himself fantasizing about what it would be like to go out to dinner with you when she was sitting in front of him. When she’d texted him to thank him for his time, Heeseung imagined the kind of things you would say after your first date. When he kissed her for the first time underneath the twinkling lights of a local fair, Heeseung pictured you as he closed his eyes. The fantasy was ruined when Seulgi’s perfume touched his olfactory senses, pulling him back into reality. The guilt of kissing somebody who wasn’t you ate at his chest the moment he saw Seulgi smile at him from where he stood. 

He tried his best with her but broke it off when the unrest overtook his mental wellbeing. It was amicable, for the most part. All Heeseung knows is that his parents (along with all of his friends) were happy that he hadn’t continued with that relationship.

“Y/N used to talk a lot about you, Heeseung,” Leo says, bringing the aforementioned out of his thoughts. “We’d be out at dinner or something and she’d always run outside to answer your calls.”

“Really?” Heeseung says out of surprise. He didn’t know you did that. 

“You bet,” Leo replies. “She talked a lot about Korea when we’d hang out with our friends but she seemed to talk about you the most.” 

Heeseung wonders if you told him about what happened between the two of you the summer before you left. 

“I’m flattered.” Heeseung honestly doesn’t know what else to say. He chooses to tell the truth. “I missed her a lot. I grew up with her living a few blocks away. It felt weird not to be with her when I went to college.” 

“Y/N said the same thing. Every time she’d be homesick, she’d tell us she needed to call you.” Leo’s words bring a warm flush to Heeseung’s face but he chooses to blame it on the alcohol. 

“I heard my name,” you say as you walk to where they’re sitting. “Not talking shit about me, my dear Leo?”

“Never,” he teases. “Although, I’m sure I still have some pretty photos of you and Elizabeth at this very pub.”

“Oh God, please don’t.” You push his shoulder when he moves to reach his phone. “Those do not need to see the light of day and you definitely need to delete them.”

“How else am I going to blackmail you?” 

“You’re the worst.” You look cute when your nose is a bit red from drinking. You always did suffer from redness to the face when you drank. “I can’t believe Elizabeth and I let you into our friend group.”

“Hey! I was the one who introduced you to her in the first place.”

“I’ll bet if I texted her right now, I’d have it in writing that she’d choose me over you.”

“Okay, you don’t need to do that because she definitely would.” 

The group laughs and conversations flow nicely as a few other friends from your university days join you later in the evening. It feels like a reunion, of sorts. It feels especially wonderful to have most of your favorite people under one roof despite the slight language barrier. But everyone seems to get along well enough, especially Riki, who has taken a liking to your Japanese friend you met on your first day of orientation. 

When the room gets too hot, you make your way outside where you’re fenced in by a metal barricade. It’s cold outside, but the alcohol running through your veins keeps you warm enough that you decide not to go back to ask for a jacket. Heeseung wants to follow you but stays still in his seat when he sees Sunghoon exit the door after you leave. 

The wine in your hands is still halfway full. You’ve decided that you’ve taken the lead far too many times this week and that Jay can handle getting everyone home. It’s your fourth drink of the night, just enough to keep you buzzed for the duration of your time at the pub. 

You register the door sliding open and make room for Sunghoon when you spot him over your shoulder. 

“Your friends are really nice,” he comments, leaning on the railing next to you. 

“They’re the best,” you say with a fond smile. “I owe them a lot. I only started enjoying my time here when we became friends.” 

“You know, I was a little worried that you wouldn’t be happy when you moved to London for the first time.”

“What makes you say that?” 

“I think a lot of people would describe you as brave and as someone who will dive in head first to things that scare you, which is true for the most part. But I think people rarely pay attention to the vulnerable side of people like you because it looks like you have it all together.”

“I was a total wreck when I first moved,” you said. “I don’t know if you remember the few times I called you when Heeseung wasn’t able to pick up.”

“Oh, I remember. That was the first time you cried to me and now you have no issue getting your snot on my sweaters.” You swat his arm at the joke but he dodges you just in time. “I remember Yeji getting worried about you too. She was so young and always said she wanted to be brave like you.”

“Sweet girl,” you say. 

“The two of you are similar. I watch out for her a lot, you know? Our relatives always think she puts on a brave face and don’t think twice when she talks about her fears. They always tell her she’ll be fine, but it’s hard to actualize that when you don’t believe it.”

“I thought about coming home a few times when things got really hard,” you confess. “I was out of my depth because I couldn’t speak English very well. I could only speak fragments and getting my way around campus was so hard.” 

“I don’t know how you did it, if I’m being honest. But I’m glad that you stuck around long enough to see what your life would be like.”

“Me too. I’d really love to think I’ve become a better person now that I’ve gotten the chance to know myself beyond the comfort of my home, you know? I love you guys and I love my family, but sometimes being back in Korea felt like I was listening to what was expected of me instead of what I wanted.”

Sunghoon laughs. “Yeji said the same thing a few weeks before we left for London. Part of me thinks she’s considering studying abroad. I found a few college brochures in her room.”

“Don’t you know better than to snoop inside your sister’s bedroom?”

“Yah,” he says. “Yeji steals too many of my sweaters and she said I could get them back.”

“You’re just too easy to make fun of, Hoonie.” 

A comfortable silence passes over the both of you. The audible sound of people talking amongst themselves and the beautiful lights of the city illuminate what makes London so beautiful. It isn’t until Sunghoon speaks that you pull yourself out of your daydreams.

“I heard you that night,” Sunghoon confesses. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“The night of the bonfire.I know you told Heeseung you liked him.”

You turn your head to him. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I figured you’d tell me whenever you felt ready,” he says with a shrug. “You went back to London a couple of weeks later and I wanted to spend time with my friend. There never seemed to be a right time.” He shoves his hands in his pockets and balances from one leg to another. “You looked really sad, Y/N. I’ve never seen you look that way before.” 

There’s a beat of silence. 

Sunghoon listens as you sigh and you push yourself from the railing. Your back touches the cold metal as you look beside yourself to see him. 

“I deluded myself into thinking Heeseung might’ve felt something for me too,” you admit. “It’s not that girls and boys can’t be friends, but towards the end of our friendship, it was like something shifted.”

“What do you mean?”

“He’d…touch me longer. Hugs, pulling me by my waist at parties, lingering near me at Riki’s bonfires, that kind of thing. He started playing with my fingers a lot more. Heeseung never used to touch me like that. He’d interrupt conversation with guys to pull me away. I always knew what he was doing but I liked him so much that I didn’t care if he interrupted a good thing between me and someone else.” 

Sunghoon purses his lips and watches as you look ahead at the glass doors to see your friends laughing. “I noticed that too.”

“When we were alone, it felt like he was one sentence away from telling me he loved me more than a friend. Not that platonic crap that the eight of us tell each other, but the deep shit where that kind of love comes from kindred souls.” 

“Heeseung’s too stupid to see what’s good for him anyway.” Sunghoon pulls a laugh out of you and he’s glad to hear it. 

“But then I confessed to him the night of that bonfire.” You bite your lip at the memory, willing yourself not to tear up. “I mean, you heard him. He told me he didn’t feel the same way and didn’t want to ruin our friendship because it was perfect as it was.”

“And then you heard he’d gotten together with Seulgi.”

“Yeah.” You nod once and look down at your drink. 

“They weren’t together long,” Sunghoon says. “She wanted more but he didn’t want to give that to her. The boys were confused because he seemed to be really happy with her until he broke it off so sudden. I always thought it was because he felt too guilty after rejecting you.”

“What did the guys think?”

“Riki hated her. I have a feeling it was because she wasn’t you, though. I think Sunoo, Jungwon, and Jake were surprised when he’d gotten together with Seulgi after you left and were trying to be nice about it. Jay was indifferent, but then again, you two weren’t as close as you were with the rest of them until he visited you while you were away.”

“Did his opinion change?” 

“Definitely. Heeseung had a period of time in the new year where he went on a couple of dates with her, telling us he might’ve made a mistake by breaking things off too soon.” Sunghoon shakes his head as he tells the story. “Jay was unbelievably pissed.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know how he gets when he’s angry. He’s quiet and doesn’t talk until he’s calm. But it was like a volcano erupted, or something. Jay came back mid January to find out Heeseung had been seeing Seulgi for a couple of weeks and completely lost it on him. He said things about not knowing a good thing if it spat in his face and how he ruined every chance of happiness because of his own doing.” 

“Wow…I didn’t know Jay said that.”

“It was scary. Heeseung tried to fight back and say it was his life and that Jay didn’t have a right to say what he could and couldn’t do, but the poor guy never stood a chance. Jay asked him if he would be happy if you came back to see him dating Seulgi and that shut him up real quick.”

“What do I have to do with it?” you ask. “He rejected me before I left.” 

“I don’t know,” Sunghoon says truthfully. “I always thought that Heeseung was trying to redeem himself through Seulgi. But I guess we’ll never truly know.” 

“It’s been almost a year,” you reminisce. “You’d think I would’ve gotten over him by now after spending time in Europe with, well, other boys.”

“He’s not just any guy who rejected you,” Sunghoon says. He looks out at the street, finding the words to say. “You two had been best friends since before me or the guys got to know either of you. There’s a special kind of bond between people who grew up together, you know?

“I think a large part of you misses being friends with him. Sure, rejection always stings, but it’s knowing that you don’t have your best friend that hurts you more.”

“Jeez,” you chide. “You always know how I feel.”

Sunghoon laughs. “I’m just observant. I know that it’s hard to be on this trip because Heeseung’s trying to be that friend you once knew. He probably feels guilty for giving you the cold shoulder during your first few weeks back in Seoul.”

You roll your eyes. “Yeah, well he’s not doing a great job showing it. Life would be easier if he left me alone.”

“But do you want that?” 

You cast your eyes to the floor. “No, I don’t.” 

Satisfied with your answer, Sunghoon nods. 

“You know, I knew Heeseung had feelings for you the night we played spin the bottle just before we graduated high school.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Hoon. He never liked me.” 

Sunghoon shakes his head. “Do you remember what happened that night?” 

“Vaguely. I remember that being my first time trying alcohol and Jake having to cut me off when I couldn’t walk straight.”

He nods. “When you were sober enough to string a few sentences together, some girl suggested playing spin the bottle. When it was your turn to spin, it landed on me.” 

You make a face. “Ah. I do remember kissing you.” 

“Well you don’t have to look grossed out,” Sunghoon teases. “Everyone knew it was awkward because we’d been friends for like, five years at that point. We were both so flustered that the kiss lasted for maybe two seconds before everyone cheered.

“Heeseung was pissed. I saw him looking at me like I’d killed his family, or something. I swore I could see steam coming out of his ears. He wouldn’t talk to me for a week because I’d been your first kiss.”

“Seriously?” 

“Dead serious.” Sunghoon laughs at the memory. “He wouldn’t answer my texts. In the group chat we were in, he’d acknowledge everyone but me. It wasn’t until a week later when we were all hanging out that I told him there was nothing between us and it was awkward to kiss you in front of our friends.” 

You stand there, dumbfounded. “Huh.”

“I’ve never told anyone that,” he confesses. “I doubt anyone remembers us kissing except for him. I assumed this would be a story I’d tell you and the guys when you both eventually got together.” 

He murmurs an apology. “It’s okay, Hoon. I’m glad you told me. I guess I’m just…confused. Why did he reject me if he allegedly liked me?” 

“I wish I knew. He was miserable when you left and refused to talk about you moving back to Europe for your final year abroad. Heeseung was really sad when he found out you weren’t coming home for Christmas break.” 

“I couldn’t bear to see him. I was so heartbroken and the friends here tonight were consoling me in the way they knew how. I knew I’d be a depressed wreck if I came back home.”

“That makes sense,” Sunghoon affirms for you. “I’m glad you met up with Jay while he was here, though. You got some kind of Christmas gift from home.” 

“Me too. I feel like Jay and I got closer because of it. I knew he could tell something was off but he didn’t say anything about it. Something tells me he knows more than he cares to say.” 

“You know Jay.” You both nod. “More observant and caring than the rest of us. Part of me thinks Heeseung’s jealous of your new friendship with him since the two of you basically planned this whole trip on your own.” 

“Well, Jay has more international travel experience and his dad knows the right people,” you say with a shrug. “I spent four years of my life here. It makes sense.”

“To us, yes. To Heeseung? I think his feelings cloud his judgment.” 

“He never used to confuse me,” you admit. “We used to talk about how much we hated when people made us guess how they felt or what they were thinking. We always said it was unfair if you make people you love, make you guess their intentions. But he’s doing that to me and it’s been driving me insane.

“Sometimes I wonder if I should’ve kept my mouth shut. I watched him date girls in high school. I watched him with what I thought would be his first serious girlfriend during our first year of college before he went through that short hookup phase. God, that hurt me so bad and I couldn’t say anything because it wasn’t my life.” 

“For what it’s worth, I think it was brave of you to confess to him,” Sunghoon tells you. “I don’t say that as a cheap cop out to make you feel better either. You know me, I’m really sentimental about things even if I don’t come off that way. To confess your feelings to someone who you love…one can only hope to hear that someday.” 

You nudge your shoulder with his. “You say that like you didn’t have girls begging for a date.” 

Sunghoon laughs and you know what he means. 

“You’ve always been the bravest of all of us,” he continues. “I think the reason why I wanted to be friends with you when we were kids is because you didn’t take bullshit from people. I was too shy to stand up for myself between my career as a figure skater while trying to be a normal kid. You and Heeseung offered that kind of normalcy. I could see you two in the bleachers at my competitions and then we’d go out for ice cream like it was any other day.” 

“Well, now you’re going to make me cry.” 

“I mean it, Y/N. You’re a great friend and a great person. I hope Heeseung hasn’t fucked things up too bad that you leave his life for good.” 

You shiver. “Me too.” 

“Talk to him,” Sunghoon advises. “Do it before we leave. You’re removed from your life back home.” You open your mouth to refute but he beats you to the chase. “If it doesn’t work out, then you’ll know your answer when you go home and you can resume your life without Heeseung in it.” 

Sunghoon leaves you alone with your thoughts but makes you promise that you’ll join the group soon.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

When you walk back into the pub, Jake clouds your personal space before you can even think about ordering another drink.

“Jesus, Hoon. Couldn’t you have offered Y/N your jacket if you guys were gonna be out that long? Poor girl looks like she’s about to freeze to death.

Jake’s affinity for the dramatic never ceases. Your friends look at your goosebumps and the way you’re acclimating to the warmer temperature inside while Sunghoon merely rolls his eyes.

“I’m fine,” you say. “We only came in because I started to get cold.”

“Let me get my jacket for you,” Heeseung says as he rises from his seat. 

“No.” You’re sure you say it too abruptly, but you can’t bear the thought of wearing his clothes after the conversation you just had. “I’m fine, honestly.” 

“Stop being stubborn and wear a damn jacket,” Leo chides, wrapping his coat around your shoulders. “You have this habit of never bringing one when you need it and it drives me crazy.” 

“But that’s what I have you for, don’t I?” 

As you tug the material closer to your body, Sunghoon watches as Heeseung stares at Leo with a hard expression. 

“Not when you’re back in Seoul, you goof.” Leo takes your empty glass. “I’m glad you have these guys back at home. They seem really good for you.” 

“I love them a lot.” You say it so tenderly with your head tilted as you look at the boys you’d call family, only for them to coo at your clearly vulnerable, inebriated state.

“My mother, my older sister, and best friend,” Riki says with a hiccup as he engulfs you in a hug. “Seriously, I would be dead in a ditch without you.” 

“I don’t know a better person,” Sunoo chimes in from where he’s seated. 

“There was one time where Y/N had this lemon phase where she couldn’t stop drinking lemonade or eating lemon candy,” Jake tells the group. “Now I think of her every time I see something yellow.” 

“That’s kind of fitting though, isn’t it?” Leo asks. “Yellow for sunshine.” 

Everybody agrees and it makes your cheeks and neck warm up. You hide yourself in Leo’s jacket, but God, Heeseung wishes he could hide you in his arms instead. 

Still, he can’t help but agree with Leo. If there’s any truth to his words, it’s that you are made of pure, unfiltered sunshine.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The next morning, all eight of you board the train for a two-hour ride to Paris. For the next five days, you’ll be acting as a tourist rather than tour guide, for the most part. Jay volunteers to take the lead since you did most of the heavy lifting in London. You do, however, chime in to give him a few recommendations from your prior visits to the city. 

Sunghoon’s advice plagues your thoughts, so much so that Jungwon has had to guide you out of the hotel and into the cab before arriving at the train station. Both he and Sunoo look a bit worried about you, but you wave them off and tell them you had one too many to drink. You know they don’t believe you but you’re grateful they don’t press on. 

Paris is much more beautiful than you remember it, and it’s likely due to the fact that you’re here on vacation, not because you wanted a weekend getaway to escape the stress of midterms and exams. The people are just as indifferent as ever. You’re able to practice some of your basic French to order coffee and pastries for everyone. It’s a feat that leaves Heeseung impressed and you try not to acknowledge him when you see his jaw drop. 

The hotel itself is more beautiful than the last. You have the room with the balcony and double doors leading to a breathtaking view of the buildings and streets below. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever seen, even if the streets are littered with trash and the people are a bit too loud. It still feels charming. 

The rooming situation is the same as London, with you in the single room and the rest of the boys to fend for themselves. This time, Jungwon, Jay, and Sunghoon are sharing the three bedroom with Heeseung and Jake sharing another, and Sunoo and Riki in the other double. The hotel must’ve miscalculated the rooming situation and put your single room at the end of the hallway away from the others, but you aren’t complaining. 

The first few days are filled with happiness and dread, namely when you see Heeseung as you begin your day. He has a knack for making you laugh until you come to the notion that you really shouldn’t be finding his jokes very funny because he doesn’t deserve that kind of reaction from you. 

In fact, he doesn’t deserve your attention after ignoring you for as long as he has. Seeing Leo again brought up memories of crying in his flat with Elizabeth and drinking too much wine to forget the pain temporarily. Your friends invited you to a night spent in the pub after Leo begged his brother to close it for the night so that you could have a free space to drink and talk about Heeseung until your voice gave out. 

Your irritation carries over and Heeseung can tell when you move away from him when he tries to stand next to you. He’s hurt but he tries to understand that you have a right to be, even if he knows in his heart the reasons why he acted the way he did. He just needs to find time to talk to you, even if the conversation doesn’t end the way he hopes it will. 

With two days left on the trip, you’ve eaten your way through the streets of Paris and have done your fair share of shopping. Each of the boys had bought you a small token of their appreciation (Heeseung paid for your latte, Jay purchased a small wallet from Prada, Jake gifted you new sunglasses, Sunghoon a charm for your bracelet, Sunoo a bowl of pasta for lunch, Jungwon a pair of earrings, and Riki a new jacket that looks similar to his from back home). It warms your heart to know you have people who care about you enough to show and tell you. 

The Eiffel Tower calls your name one late afternoon and by the time you all manage to walk up, the sun is setting below the horizon. There are couples around Heeseung who are taking photos left and right, one of which asks him to take a few pictures for them. He can’t help but wish he was in their place, asking a stranger to take a photo of the two of you as he kisses the apple of your cheek. Heeseung snaps a few good ones before the couple thanks him. 

It doesn’t help that you look like a walking goddess. Truth be told, Heeseung wanted to buy you more than just coffee when the boys agreed to each give you something as a token of their gratitude. Heeseung had come up with a list of ideas he wanted advice for, but it was Sunghoon who’d told him to keep it simple for your sake. He was right, as always, because you thanked him with a pleasant smile instead of ignoring him like you had in the days prior. Heeseung gets the feeling that you wouldn’t appreciate a grand gesture from him right now.

He hates that he can’t read you like he used to. He hates that the other friends know you better than he does, and he hates that he’s in the City of Love and he can’t call you his girlfriend. 

Riki and Jungwon are more perceptive than they let on. Heeseung sees the way their eyes dart between the two of you and how they’ve been trying their best to navigate the new dynamic. Riki, especially, hadn’t been receptive of Seulgi the first time Heeseung invited her to a bonfire. Heeseung had overheard the younger boy telling Jungwon it wasn’t the same without you there and that he’d rather go home than spend another minute getting to know someone who wasn’t you. 

At the time, Heeseung was beyond irritated and refused to speak to Riki for the rest of the night. Now, however, he understands why Riki acted the way he did. 

You look so beautiful underneath a Parisian sunset. Heeseung knows he’s staring. He’s grateful that you’re too preoccupied with Sunghoon taking photos of you. But God, he wishes you’d laugh at him like that. 

“You should talk to her,” Jake says from beside him. Heeseung jumps at his sudden appearance. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” 

“I want to.” Heeseung says it out loud for the first time. He wants to work it out with you and get his best friend back in whatever way you’ll allow. “I miss her, Jake. I miss being her friend and I fucked up when I rejected her.” 

Heeseung doesn’t notice Jake’s eyes widen at the sudden admission. Jake had his fair share of theories and considered Heeseung to be his best friend, but even he knew there was a limit about what he was willing to share and what he kept to himself. Heeseung’s friendship with you was something he stopped trying to learn a few years after he got to know you; Heeseung had a soft spot for you and had no problem letting people know that. It wasn’t until you mentioned to Jake that you hadn’t spoken to Heeseung in months that he knew something was up. 

“She clearly cares about you,” Jake says. “She wouldn’t be on this trip if she didn’t.”

“But she’s been ignoring me the past three days. And before you say it, yes, I know that she has a valid reason to, but I’m hurt and I want to make things better.”

“You have to let her take the reins and let her talk to you when she wants to,” Jake advises. “You know how she is. Y/N’s headstrong and she might not know how she feels right now, but she always knows what’s best for her. You’re good for her, Heeseung. Let her come to that conclusion on her own.”

Heeseung relinquishes his breath. “You’re right. I just…miss her. A lot. Things will never go back to the way they used to but I don’t think I want them to. I used to pray every night that I could somehow make everything like it was before that night but now I want more than that. She deserves better and I want to be better for her, not that coward who was too scared to try something new with the person he loves.” 

His friend’s words bring a smile to Jake’s lips. “Well I, for one, believe in you. I think the rest of the guys do too.” 

“I know,” Heeseung says softly with his eyes on you.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

You can’t believe you leave Europe in two days as you sip your wine. Jay’s father was gracious enough to reach out to his friend at the hotel’s restaurant to negotiate having this meal compensated. It’s a gesture you hold onto and make a mental note to write a thoughtful note when you settle back in Korea. Jay sits next to you and partakes in the wine activities with you, namely picking out two different bottles to share with the table. Talking to Jay like this makes you feel otherworldly, like you’ve gotten more experience out of life since you chose to study abroad. You feel lucky, in a sense, that your life has given you more than you expected it too. 

The younger boys head upstairs after dessert and bid you all a goodnight in case they don’t see you before falling asleep. For the next thirty minutes or so, it’s the five of you laughing away at the hotel bar like old times, reminiscing about embarrassing moments from high school or how difficult it was to hear Jake’s Korean when he first moved. 

The Australian leaves as soon as he yawns. Sunghoon, a little too tipsy upon standing from the bar table, presses a gentle kiss to your head when he says goodnight to the rest of you. Jay gives your arm a reassuring squeeze and you understand for the first time that he always knew you better than he let on. He says goodnight and tells the bartender to charge his room whenever you two close the tab. 

Now, you and Heeseung are sitting together, mere inches apart as the Parisian sky twinkles with stars above the two of you. 

Neither of you know what to say. You fidget with the glass and contemplate on whether you should head up as well. Heeseung can sense your awkwardness and wish he hadn’t messed things up so badly that you can’t stand to be alone with him without thinking of an escape plan. He misses when the two of you could sit in complete silence and still feel comfortable around one another. 

“Thank you for showing us around,” he speaks up before you can make the decision to leave. “I remember you talking about all of the places you showed us when you first moved here. I’ve always wanted to visit.” 

“Really?” 

Heeseung nods. “I used to be so jealous that you got the opportunity to travel abroad every time you talked about it. But I think I like it better this way, with you as the tour guide.” 

That brings a laugh out of you and Heeseung can’t help but smile. He doesn’t care if it’s the alcohol allowing your walls to come down. He’s grateful for the chance. 

“I used to write down places I wanted to show you,” you confess. “There were so many places that reminded me of where we’d used to hang out as kids. It always felt like there was a part of you with me.” 

His heart melts. “I wish I could’ve visited you while you were here. Your friends seem pretty cool.” 

“They are.” Heeseung watches you smile. “They’ve been with me through a lot and helped me get over this fear of failing in a different country. My friend Suki, who now lives in Tokyo, was the first person to really get me out of my shell and convinced me to go out. Awkward Y/N? Going to clubs?” 

“You know how to dance, though. I bet you killed it.” 

“A little too much, perhaps. I didn’t date or hook up much, but there were a few times that I did.” Heeseung’s heart begins to sink as does his hope. This is not where he wanted to lead the conversation but his ears perk up at your next point. “But I wasn’t happy doing that so I stopped making out with random guys on the dance floor.”

“If only thirteen-year-old you could see you then,” he teases. You bump his shoulders with yours and he feels electricity running down his arm. 

“I think I did a good job adjusting and learning. There were times where I felt like I didn’t know what I was doing with my life because I couldn’t decide if I wanted to stay in London or go back to Seoul. That burden felt too much.” 

“For what it’s worth, I’m glad you came back home.” 

Your head whips to look at Heeseung, who can only sit and watch as your eyes begin to water. 

“Why didn’t you say anything when I texted and called you?” you ask meekly, your voice barely above a whisper. “Why didn’t you see me when I came back?” 

“I know.” He gulps. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m so, so sorry.” 

You sniffle and Heeseung wants to cry too. “Everyone came to pick me up at the airport. I kept looking for you but you weren’t there. Jake had to pull me away from baggage claim because he said you weren’t coming but I didn’t listen. I told him he was wrong. You always come.” 

Heeseung’s soul breaks with every crack in your voice and with the way your lips quiver. He sees your mascara beginning to smudge and resists the urge to wipe it away so that your eyes may look fresh and dry. 

“I’m sorry,” he repeats. “I have no excuse.” 

“I wanted my best friend but you never showed up for me. You didn’t call or text me when you knew I was home and I had to wait until Riki’s bonfire to see you.”

“I was an idiot and stupid,” is the only answer Heeseung can come up with. “I used to be so scared of change. You left the country and I had to start thinking about what I wanted to do with my life but it was so hard without you in it.”

“Then why did you leave me?” 

His heart shatters. 

You’ve turned away from him in an attempt to walk back to your hotel room. However, Heeseung has learned his lesson. He doesn’t let you stray too far and gently tugs your wrist to pull you into his chest and is surprised when you don’t fight him off of you.

He doesn't care that your tears have stained his shirt or that you’re hiccupping into his clothes. All Heeseung wants to do is let you know he’s here for you now, despite his past mistakes and clouded judgment. Heeseung loves you for your bravery and vulnerability. He can only hope you understand that. 

“Let’s go to your room, yeah? I can help you take your makeup off.”

Whether from the alcohol or your need to be near Heeseung, you let him guide you to the elevator. He digs in your purse for your room key and coaxes you to sit in the bathroom while he locks the door. This routine feels a bit familiar; in his youth, he learned how you like to take your makeup off and get ready for bed after a particularly rough night drinking. He could never understand why he hadn’t minded taking the extra step and to keep himself sober when you were in the vicinity, but he understands it now. 

Heeseung meets you in the bathroom and washes his hands before putting your hair in a ponytail. He bites his lips when he sees your fresh tears and mutters another apology, forcing himself not to wipe away the tears with his fingers. Instead, he lets you blot them with a tissue before gathering makeup remover in his hands and gently smears it all over your skin. 

“I didn’t like change,” he says after a quiet beat. “I was too cowardly to take what I wanted, even if the person I wanted said they wanted me too. I don’t know why I didn’t chase after you that night or why I thought you needed space before you left. I don’t have an explanation for any of it except to say that I was a coward who never wanted anything to change between us.” 

Heeseung warms a wet cloth and wipes the balm away until he’s satisfied and moves on with your favorite cleanser, rubbing it between his hands until it foams. 

“I think, deep down, I’ve always loved you more than I led on. I can’t think of any moment in my life where you weren’t there or times that I didn’t want you around. Even when we were in elementary school and everyone kept saying we would get cooties from each other, I wanted you with me.” 

He lets you wash your face and applies the rest of your products on as you once taught him. 

“I’ve always had this sense of pride when it came to being your friend. Everyone always talked about how cool you were because you always knew what to say and when to say it. I love that about you, you know. You have a way of making people feel like they’re really special. I don’t know why I was so afraid of that.

“I love who you are and what you believe in. You make the world a better place for everyone around you. How you treated me was a small fraction of why I love you. I love your passions and that you aren’t afraid to chase after them. I love that you stick with the same boba order even though you tell yourself you’ll try something new. I love that you hate the beach but go with us every time we ask. I love when you get a little drunk because you don’t fight me when I want to take care of you.”

Heeseung swallows. “But mostly, I just really love you.”

You open your eyes for the first time. Heeseung can only stare. 

“You really hurt me.” 

He glances down. “I know. I’m sorry.” 

“What hurt the most was knowing you weren’t going to be there as my best friend, Heeseung. I could handle your rejection. I could find a way to get over you. But I could never get over losing our friendship. I never wanted you out of my life because it’s better with you in it.” 

“Please don’t get over me,” Heeseung croaks. His own eyes begin to swell and he forces a choked sob down his throat, aggressively wiping his eyes to rid himself of tears. He presses his forehead against yours. “I don’t want you to get over me.” 

You don’t say anything for a few moments. Heeseung swears he feels the blood rushing to his ears as he anticipates your response and he’s sure that even if what you say isn’t what he wants to hear, he’s happy to wear his feelings on his sleeve for once in his life.

“I don’t think I could even if I tried.” 

Heeseung’s heart stops beating. He doesn’t kiss you even though he wants to. He doesn’t take your hand and pull you into him like his heart tells him to. Instead, he whispers a quiet thanks and is surprised when he hears you laugh. 

“I can’t apologize enough. I don’t want to make you feel like you have to do or say anything.” 

“I know,” you whisper. Heeseung's hands are dangling awkwardly by his side. He feels like pushing his forehead against yours was too much. But your hands reach for him and you give him a squeeze.  

Heeseung throws caution out of the window and envelopes you in a hug. He feels your body melt against his and can’t help but look at the way you’ve folded into his chest in the bathroom mirror, with your head in his neck and his cheek on the crown of your head. Heeseung missed holding you like this–with your bodies intertwined as if you were two soulmates who were forced apart upon creation. 

He stroked your back with his hand and kept the other secured around your waist. Your soft breaths touch his skin and it feels like he’s got electricity running through his veins. 

“I’m sorry,” Heeseung whispers again. “I will keep apologizing until you know the depth of my regret.” 

The boy feels like he’s floating when you press a soft kiss to his exposed chest, mentally thanking Jake for forcing him to let loose and unbutton a few. 

“You could start by staying with me until I fall asleep,” you say. “Like old times.” 

He tries not to punch the air. “I can do that.” 

Heeseung waits in the bathroom until you’ve changed into comfortable clothing. He isn’t surprised when he sees you in shorts and an oversized shirt. It’s reminiscent of what you used to wear when you’d sleep in the guest bedroom in his house or vice versa, but now that he’s acknowledged his feelings for you, he can’t help but coo at how cute and sleepy you look. 

You tuck yourself in bed with the blankets to your chin and he completely melts to the floor. You pat the spot next to him and he sits on top of the blankets. 

“Under the covers, silly.” 

“I don’t want to rush it,” Heeseung says in a panic. 

“We aren’t rushing. We’re two best friends who got each other back.” 

Heeseung has never been more relieved. Though, he knows you’re a stickler for outside clothes in bed, so he makes the decision to take your key card and change.

“I’m not leaving you,” he says when he notices you rise from your spot on the bed. He holds two key cards to prove it and leans over to press a soft kiss to your cheek. “I’m going to change and then I’ll be right back. I promise.” 

He comes back ten minutes later. It warms your heart at the sight of him and you feel the comfort in your body when he slides underneath the covers. 

You surprise yourself when you move to lay your head on his chest with your arm around his body. Heeseung doesn’t seem to mind, though, and he pulls you closer to him like you’ve done it a million times before. The two of you have wanted this for too long to make it feel awkward. 

“What did Jake say when you came into the room?” you ask.

“He was half asleep until I turned the light on but he asked me if we resolved things. I told him yes and then he asked if I was staying the night with you when he saw me leaving.”

“Am I right to assume he was more excited about having the room to himself?”

Heeseung laughs. “That you are.”

“Deep down, I think Jake knew we’d find our way. I think they all did.” 

“I’m sorry,” Heeseung whispers once more. You quiet him with a kiss to his cheek. 

“I know, Hee. We can talk more tomorrow. For now, let’s sleep.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The next morning, Heeseung wakes up before you do and frowns when your body’s all the way on the other side of the bed. He leans over your sleeping frame and brushes strands of hair from your face, admiring how serene you look in your sleep. For a moment, Heeseung ponders if it’s too soon to wake you up the way he’d like to, but if last night was any indication about how you felt, he’d be willing to take the chance. 

He leans down to kiss your forehead and both of your cheeks repeatedly until your eyes flutter open. Heeseung thinks he could listen to your laugh every morning with the way you wince at the sunlight and how his lips touch your skin. Still, your gaze finds its way to Heeseung’s and you can’t help but smile. 

There was a brief moment before you fell asleep that you’d wondered if you’d been too quick to forgive him. But for as hurtful as the past year was, you can’t help but acknowledge the steps he took during the trip in an attempt to undo all of the contempt you had built for him. You owe it to yourself to be happy with Heeseung. 

“Good morning, pretty girl,” Heeseung says with his morning voice that sounds a little too good for seven in the A.M. “Did you sleep well?”

“Slept like a baby. I feel like one too.”

“That’s because you are a baby,” Heeseung teases, kissing your cheeks and then the tip of your nose. “My baby.” 

“I really want breakfast but I’m too lazy to get up from the bed.”

“We could always order in. I’ll pay.”

You shake your head. “I’ll be too tempted to stay in bed and it’s our last full day in Paris. Let’s just get ready and have breakfast at the hotel restaurant?” 

The both of you are halfway done eating breakfast when the rest of your friends trickle in, joining your table and the ones next to you. It takes them a while to wake up, but it’s Sunghoon who speaks up first. 

“I’m assuming you two talked?” 

“And made up,” you say with a tilt of your head. 

“That’s my girl,” Sunghoon says proudly, sipping on his coffee. 

“I’ll let that slide since we’re all friends,” Heeseung jokes. You laugh and, for the first time in a while, you don’t feel guilty about it. 

“I had the whole room to myself, too. I woke up and didn’t have to fight anyone for the bathroom,” says Jake. 

Riki nearly spits his juice out. “You guys slept together?” 

“Not like that!” you’re quick to exclaim. “He just slept over. Slept. As in, we closed our eyes and actually slept.” 

“Both of us knew we needed our beauty sleep before dealing with the six of you asking us questions,” Heeseung adds. “But for your information, we made up. We still have things to figure out, but we’re back to being friends.” 

“Hopefully more than that,” Jungwon coughs behind his coffee. He merely smiles when Heeseung looks in his direction.

“I think you two should spend the rest of the day by yourselves,” Jay suggests. “We can either meet up for dinner or whenever we have to check out.” 

“I second that,” Sunoo agrees. “You two clearly need to talk.” 

“I wanted to go shopping with Y/N again,” Riki says with a frown. Jake presumably knocks his shin with Riki’s, who clears his throat. “But you two should totally hang out without us.” 

“I think we might,” Heeseung says, holding his hand out for you to take. He stands from his seat and encourages you to stand as well, leading you away from the table. “Thanks for the breakfast, Jay!” 

“I’m choosing to be the bigger person because Y/N’s been through enough,” Jay mutters when Heeseung is out of hearshot, making the table laugh.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

“You know, I think the reason why I had such a hard time reaching out was because we’d never gotten into something that serious before,” Heeseung admits. The gelato in your hand isn’t as good as you remember it, but it does the job to cool you down on a particularly warm afternoon. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Do you remember when we were kids and how hard it was for me to talk to you about anything that was action movies or superheroes?” 

“God, you and your Superman cape from fourth grade,” you snort. “You wore that thing to school everyday. Your dad had to wash it every night otherwise you’d refuse to go to sleep.” Heeseung shuts his eyes at the memory. 

“You were the only person I felt comfortable pouring my heart out to, you know. You were always the first person I called when I needed someone to talk to, but then I was the reason why you got hurt…I think part of me didn’t know if I was allowed to reach out to you.

“It’s a stupid excuse, I know. But when I heard you were coming back to Seoul a few weeks before you did, I couldn’t help but think about how many times I could’ve texted you.”

“Yeah, you could’ve.” Heeseung merely nods at your agreement. “We’ve been through a lot over the years, but I guess there’s a first time for everything.” 

“I just wish I had come to this conclusion when it happened. I was so caught up in graduating and focusing on how I felt that I didn’t consider how you must’ve been dealing with all of it. I don’t think I’ve ever been so selfish in my life.” 

“I think the time you refused to let me be friends with Jake because you said you needed friends aside from me was your second most selfish moment.” 

Heeseung rolls his eyes. “Quit it. I was thirteen, okay?” 

Neither of you particularly care to do any sightseeing today. It feels nice to walk side-by-side without the company of your other friends. The juxtaposition of how you felt towards the beginning of this trip compared to how relaxed you feel surprises you a tenfold, but you suppose that comes with genuine apologies and forgiveness. 

You’re willing to admit Heeseung looks criminally good in black jeans and a striped button down. He wears his clothes so effortlessly yet still looks like he could’ve taken his wardrobe from a magazine. You’ve always found it a bit unfair that Heeseung always manages to look so cool without trying too hard. 

“You’re staring,” he mutters, looking at you from the corner of his eye as the two of you walk down a cobblestone street. 

“I’m not,” you lie. You turn your head to avoid his gaze, but Heeseung thinks he likes seeing you this shy. It’s new territory for him, one that he wants to explore. 

“Can I ask you a question?” 

“Go for it.” 

“Why did you forgive me so quickly?” Heeseung asks. “I appreciate it, I really do, but a big part of me feels like I don’t deserve that just yet.” 

It takes you a while to answer. Why did you forgive him as fast as you did? For a week and a half, being in close quarters with Heeseung made you feel nothing but anxious and on edge, so why were you able to allow yourself to be vulnerable in front of him?

“I’ve always held onto the idea that you’re a good person,” you begin. “I’ve always admired that you intend to care for the people you love and make them feel like they have a place in your life. You’ve always made me feel safe, like I could run to you when things got too hard. 

“What you did was in poor taste, sure, but making bad decisions doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. I know you, Hee. I know how you get when you’re faced with a difficult choice and how long it takes for you to come around. I was justifiably hurt but I think a part of me always knew you’d fix it somehow.” 

“I wish I could feel deserving of that kind of forgiveness.” 

“You know me. You know I wouldn’t tell you that if I didn’t feel like what I’m saying is true. I’ll admit that I shocked myself with how quickly I let my guard down with you…but you’re Heeseung. You've been my best friend since the first grade and you’re the boy I happen to have a really big crush on.” 

Heeseung bites his lips at your confession, willing himself not to be too forward as to kiss you in the middle of the street. He sees your bravery and the way you’ve put your heart directly in the palm of his hand, acting out of vulnerability even though the both of you knew he hurt you once before. 

He doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t need to. Instead, Heeseung grabs your hands and locks his fingers with yours, squeezing three times to tell you he loves you.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The afternoon comes and goes with little to no plan. Heeseung’s a bit worried that he hasn’t heard anything from the boys and he’s rendered shocked that you’ve taken it upon yourself to let the day take you where it may instead of finding the next spot to visit. 

As if on cue, Jay texts him with plans for the evening. 

jjongcaprio: 20:00, Pétrelle. It’s a five minute walk from the hotel

jjongcaprio: I made reservations for you and Y/N tonight. Don’t worry about me and the boys, just take her out on a romantic date 

jjongcaprio: The bill’s covered. The reservation’s under your name btw

heeseung: bro i cannot ask you to do this 

jjongcaprio: You don’t have to. You and I both know Y/N deserves to be wined and dined 

jjongcaprio: Plus I saw you looking at a few restaurants when we were on the train. I managed to pull some strings for you and got a last minute reservation for tonight

heeseung: thank you jay…i really don’t know what i’d do without you

jjongcaprio: It’s really not a problem, bro. Promise me that you’ll try to be happy with her. The guys and I are rooting for you two

“So,” Heeseung clears his throat as he looks up from his phone, “I think you and I should go out for dinner.” 

“Where are you thinking of going? I can text the others and see if they’re done sightseeing, or whatever it is they’re doing.”

“I mean just us two.” He stands awkwardly when you’ve turned your attention to him, his feet planted on the sidewalk beneath him as if that’ll help steady his beating heart. 

“Like a date?” 

“Yes,” he says immediately. “Like I date. I, Heeseung, am asking you out on a date. Tonight. At eight.” 

“I, Y/N, would love to go on a date with you. At eight.” 

The twinkle in your eye and your coy nature makes him feel like a teenager again. He leads you into the hotel and walks you to your door before stepping back as you step inside. 

“We’ve got an hour and a half before we need to leave. I’ll come by and then we can walk together. The restaurant is only a five minute walk, so you can wear those new heels I know you feel guilty buying.” 

“They’re really pretty though,” you rationalize. 

Heeseung nods. “Gorgeous, actually. Maybe you’ll be as tall as me if you wear them.” 

“We’ll just have to see, won’t we?” 

Heeseung bites his bottom lip as you disappear behind the door, locking eyes with you until you’re completely out of sight. Flirting with you like this is a completely new phenomenon for him. He’s only daydreamed about what you might say if he said something a little too suggestive or how you might act if he dedicated a wink in your direction. Heeseung had never considered that he’d be the one flustered, cheeks reddening to the point where he starts to feel shy. 

His nerves are endless as he picks out an outfit for tonight. Heeseung sends a quick text to his parents, who had pressured him into bringing nice clothes for a fancy dinner, and spends a few minutes updating them on the events of the past few days. His mother is pleased, to put it lightly, and sends a handful of emoticons to display her happiness. His father tells him words of encouragement before making Heeseung promise to bring you for dinner as his girlfriend, not just his best friend. 

With the last touch of his cologne, Heeseung looks at himself in the mirror and tries not to think too hard about how he looks. You’re Y/N, his best friend since he can remember, and you’ve seen him with snot dripping from his nose. 

“I look fine,” he says to himself in the mirror. “Y/N will like the look because your mom picked it out and we know those two agree on everything. Absolutely nothing to worry about.” 

Heeseung’s only regret is he doesn’t have a bouquet of flowers to present you with as he makes his way to your hotel room. He wipes his palms on his trousers and takes a deep breath before knocking on your door. 

When it opens, he’s met with the sight of you in a short black dress that hugs your hips to accentuate your body. The dress itself is an elegant, spaghetti strap number with a flattering neckline paired with jewelry that makes your skin appear to be glowing. Your heels match well with the dress you’ve chosen, so much so that Heeseung’s jaw drops when his eyes rake over your body. 

“Wow,” he mutters. “Just…wow.” 

“I’m not used to you being speechless,” you say mildly, closing the door behind you. 

“You look gorgeous,” he sputters. “I shouldn’t be seen with you tonight.” 

“You’re dramatic, Hee.” You give him a once over and Heeseung thinks he wouldn’t mind you checking him out as you please. “You look handsome as ever.”

He beams at the compliment and holds his arm out for you. 

“Shall we?”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Heeseung knows the type of person you are and what you value, yet he still renders himself shocked when you allow him to take control of the evening. He knows you don’t need to have the expensive consequences that come with a first date or to be sipping the most luxurious wine to be happy, but Heeseung can’t help but feel like you deserve to feel as elegant as you look every once in a while. 

The host leads the two of you to a table with the most gorgeous view of the Parisian scenery. The twinkling stars paired with the dimly lit restaurant adds a romantic touch to the evening. Heeseung mentally thanks Jay for preparing wine recommendations so neither of you have to think too much about it. 

For a moment, he’s worried that he’s reached too far out of his depth. The fanciest thing Heeseung has ever done with you is eat ramen after prom in your best outfits because you both came to the conclusion that prom should be spent with someone you actually like. It’s funny in hindsight when he thinks about it now. 

You look so beautiful like this, allowing yourself to be taken care of by him. Talking to you over the table feels like you’re back in Korea before all that transpired. The food is impeccable and Heeseung thanks his lucky stars that he and Jay got it right. You sing praises left and right. 

Dinner ends much quicker than he’d like as the two of you finish dessert. The waiter tells him the bill has been taken care of and Heeseung sits in his seat awkwardly as you look out the window to see the view from outside. But he hears the live band in the background and sees a few older couples slow dancing from where he sits and makes up his mind. 

“Do you want to dance?” 

You pull your attention to him. For a moment, he thinks he’s asked the most absurd question known to man when he recalls all the times you refused to make a home on the dance floor until you’ve gotten at least four drinks in your system. 

You surprise him. 

“I’d love to, Hee.” 

The room disappears when he leads you to the dance floor. He mimics the other dancers and takes the lead, swaying your bodies back and forth to the melody of the music. You smell of vanilla and cinnamon, a scent so distinctly you that it makes him grin like a man in love. 

“Thank you for tonight,” you say against his neck. “I won’t lie when I say I feel like a princess.”

“That’s because you are a princess,” Heeseung says, kissing the top of your head. “You deserve to be treated like one.”

“I can’t believe you pulled this off so quickly. Don’t restaurants like these require reservations?”

He chuckles nervously. “About that…Jay helped me with the details. I was looking up restaurants to take you to if I got the chance before our trip ended. I guess he saw the list and chose the most romantic one out of the bunch.”

“I owe Jay a thank you.”

“We both do.” 

“I feel lucky to have people in my life who care about me this much,” you say. “I’m so happy you’re back in my life.” 

“I’m happy to be in it.” Heeseung squeezes your waist. “Deep down, it’s always been you that I’ve loved. There’s not a single person who makes me feel the way you do.”

“Yeah?” 

You feel him nod. “I’ll say it until you believe me. I’ll even yell it in this restaurant right now.” 

“Please don’t,” you laugh. “I believe you.” 

The sound of the melody overtakes the conversation. You feel Heeseung’s steady heartbeat as he expertly moves your bodies together on the dance floor. When you close your eyes, you think of this moment and how badly you want to commit it to memory, no longer in anguish over the tribulations of the past year. It feels nice to let go of your worries, even better that you have Heeseung back. 

“I really want to kiss you,” he murmurs under his breath. You pull your head back.

“Then you should kiss me.” 

Heeseung wastes no time and pulls you into him, one arm around your waist and the other behind your neck. His mouth finds yours when he decides he loves the taste of red wine on your lips. It feels poetic to be kissing you for the first time as you’re both dressed to the nines in the middle of Paris. To him, kissing you feels like a breath of fresh air and the start of something new. For you, kissing him feels like coming home. 

When he pulls back, you search for his eyes. 

“Take me back to the hotel,” you whisper. 

Heeseung feels his heart drop. 

“I’m sorry. We can go back now.”

You grip the collar of his slightly unbuttoned dress shirt when he moves. It’s only then that Heeseung sees the want in your eyes and the pure lust that clouds your pupils. 

“Take me back to the hotel.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

By the time your elevator reaches your floor, Heeseung’s dress shirt is completely unbuttoned with his toned chest exposed. You’re barely able to detach yourself from his mouth when he pushes you out of the contraption. Your hand reaches for his as you pull him towards your room, digging through your purse when you feel Heeseung’s lips on the back of your neck. 

“You look sexy in my jacket,” he mumbles, pressing wet kisses to your skin. 

“L-Let me find the key.” 

“So sexy.” His hands slide up the side of your body until he grips your waist. 

When the door opens, you pull Heeseung inside with you and lock it shut before pushing his dress shirt off of his body, exposing his muscular build and broad shoulders. You aren’t shy about hiding your lust, gazing all over his chest and abdomen as you feel your core drip with arousal. 

“I like it when you look at me like that,” Heeseung says. He reaches for your hand and places it on his chest. You take the liberty to glide your nails down his abdomen, feeling the way he tenses underneath your touch. 

“I’m really wet,” you say as you eye the tent that has grown in Heeseung’s pants. 

“Are you?” he asks. “You won’t mind if I check?” 

You shake your head and Heeseung takes that as a green light, his hands finding the soft fabric of your dress before pushing his hand underneath it. He whimpers when his fingers come in contact with your wet lips. It’s adorable, the way you push yourself against him to chase his lips while he fingers smear your wetness across the fabric of your panties. 

“Bed,” you mumble against his lips. 

He follows where you pull him, loving the way you take control when you push him onto the mattress. Heeseung distracts himself to catch his breath from the overwhelming sense of pleasure to realize that you’ve started to undo his belt buckle and take his hard cock out of his pants. 

“You don’t have to—”

“I want your cock in my mouth,” you plead, looking him in the eye. “Please let me.” 

You sit politely on your knees as you unbuckle Heeseung’s pants. His chest rises and falls in anticipation and he looks down at you to see that your mouth is watering at the sight of him. 

He’s already fully hard; he has been since you started unbuttoning his shirt in the elevator. You spit directly onto the tip of his cock and he bites his lip at the sudden contact before watching as you swipe your hand up and down himself. 

Heeseung doesn’t want to think about how you learned to do what you’re doing to him. He doesn’t want to think about the boys you’ve kissed or the people who got to see you like this before. What he does know, however, is he’s the only person from here on out who will see you on your knees if he can help it. 

Your mouth envelopes the head and Heeseung emits a short grunt. The tension between you two begins to slowly dissipate as you fit more of his cock inside of your mouth. Your tongue expertly traces every ridge and vein as you push your throat down onto him, causing Heeseung to put his palms on the mattress and throw his head back. 

You hum around him when he moans. He’s itching to put his hand behind your head but refuses the idea, letting you set your own pace. Heeseung watches as you switch your angle, sitting up to rest on your knees to push your head further down on him. He witnessed as you spread your legs, a choked moan coming from his throat in conjunction with a particular gag from your mouth. 

There’s spit everywhere. It’s trailing down your lips and connecting to his cock when you pull yourself from his body. It’s seeping to his pants and he’s about to speak up when your motion attaches itself to his sensitive balls, licking at its warmth while your hand strokes him from atop. 

“That’s it. Fuuuuck.”

He bucks his hips once and curses. Heeseung feels your mouth envelop one of his balls, the pressure of your mouth around it making him feel a kind of euphoria he didn’t know was possible. Your mouth moves to the other to give it the same treatment before retreating back to his cock. This time, your hand massages him from below as you suck on him. 

When you look up at him and wink, he decides enough is enough. 

“Baby,” Heeseung pants, attempting to push your head off of him. He thinks it’s so sexy that you’re turned on while giving him a blowjob. “Baby, please stop. I don’t wanna come yet.” 

You oblige and take your mouth off of him with a popping sound. You sit back and Heeseung stares at you through drooping eyelids in pure shock and amazement at how you’ve managed to pull him to a near orgasm as quickly as you did.

“Come here,” he beckons with his fingers.

He attaches his mouth to yours and pushes his tongue inside of your mouth, exploring the warm, wet walls you have to offer. Heeseung decides that he loves the feeling of your tongue against his and lets you suck on the muscle. 

You take your dress off to reveal sheer panties with nothing else on. Heeseung’s jaw drops at your beauty, but he also cannot believe how sexy his best friend’s body is. To him, you were sculpted from the hands of Aphrodite herself with great love and care. And it’s all for him.

“You are so fucking sexy,” he murmurs, hovering over your body to press kisses to the valley of your chest. You let his hands roam and spread your legs to make room for him. 

Heeseung’s head travels back to your chest and you watch as he envelops your right nipple in his mouth. “Your tits are just perfect.” 

He makes a show out of it, hands cupping your breasts to massage them as his mouth works on you. He pushes your tits together and shoves his face between them, inhaling your scent while his tongue gathers whatever taste your body gives him. Heeseung moves to your left nipple and uses his tongue to flick the hardened bud over and over again until you’re arching your chest into his mouth. 

He grinds himself into your core with his pants still loose around his legs. It brings a moan out of your throat and he swallows it whole with his lips pressed firmly against yours. The friction feels delicious with the fabric of your panties against the hardness of Heeseung’s cock. He grinds against you with the help of your hips rolling into his, your natural wetness coating his cock in your essence. 

Heeseung moves his head to kiss your jawline, moving his mouth all over the expanse of your neck until he kisses right below your earlobe. You let out a particularly loud moan when he does, and Heeseung curses.

“Shit. Yeah baby, make those sounds for me. Let me hear your pretty moans.” 

His mouth attacks the area again and you aren’t shy about it. Your hands tangle in his hair as he kisses your neck and grinds his cock against the wet panties, which have by now molded to the shape of your pussy. 

Heeseung groans at the feeling of a particularly wet gush and lifts his hips enough to elicit a whimper out of your mouth. He experimentally lifts his hips again to align himself with you as he did before. The pressure must feel so good because your mouth hangs open with your eyes boring into his. 

“That’s it,” he encourages. “Does my baby feel good?” You can only nod and he doesn’t blame you. “That’s a good baby. Fuck, you’re so wet, it’s driving me crazy.” 

Heeseung feels your legs wrap around him and the way your heel pushes his lower back into your core. He takes the hint and quickens his pace, wanting nothing more than to see you come for him.

“You gotta come for me now, pretty girl,” he coaxed. “You deserve to come. Won’t you do that for me?” 

Heeseung is sure that he’s never seen or heard anything more erotic compared to the vision of watching you come. Your mouth opens with breathy moans as you focus on your pleasure and your eyes squeeze shut as if you’re trying to savor the moment in your mind.

“Atta girl,” Heeseung praises when your hips grind into his. He keeps himself still and lets your body take over. 

You eventually come down and realize Heeseung has yet to come, but that’s the last thing on his mind. He sinks his body down to come face-to-face with your crotch and licks the come off of the soiled fabric of your panties. The sheerness gives him a sneak peek at your pussy, and he groans when he licks a slow, fat strip up your slit.

“You taste so fucking delicious, baby.” He licks at you again, faster this time. “Tastes like milk and honey.” 

Heeseung kisses your wet panties over and over again, his soft lips providing jolts of pleasure. His hands roam around the soft flesh of your thighs and squeezes them as if he remembers you’re all his to touch. The feeling is one you want to commit to memory, but it seems like Heeseung knows your mind is working overtime because he reaches his hand to find yours and gives it a reassuring squeeze. 

You let his hand go when he pulls it from you to slide the useless barrier down your legs and to undo the straps of your heels. He takes great care to kiss your skin tenderly, starting by your ankle and making his way down just shy of where you need him the most. Heeseung repeats the process on the other leg until he comes face to face with your glistening core, licking his lips as if he doesn’t know where to start. 

“Such a pretty pussy,” he says before placing a soft kiss to your clit.

He repeats the motion, kissing your folds like they’re delicate antiquities that need to be handled with the utmost care. His lips become covered with your essence; he feels you squirm underneath him and uses the expanse of his palms to gently pry your legs open for him, soothing the soft skin of your inner thighs. 

Heeseung tentatively licks your slit and decides he loves the sound of your moans when he has his mouth on you. He does it again, dragging his tongue to feel every ridge and crevice that he’s yet to explore. His mouth feels like a warm comfort with the slow pace he sets, licking you as if he’s trying to tell you how much he loves you without saying it. 

“You taste divine.” 

You look down below to see his hair covering his eyes and brush it away with your hands. Heeseung looks right into your soul and you feel your heart clench, causing you to roll your hips into his face. He merely buries his nose close to you until he bumps your clit with the tip, pushing his wet muscle into you deeper. 

When your moans get lighter and your breathy sounds are the only audible thing in the room aside from his own moans. You open your eyes to see Heeseung humping the mattress below you. The sight is so erotic that you can’t help but let out a loud whine at the thought of Heeseung pleasuring himself while pleasuring you. 

He brings his fingers to your pussy and sways his fingers back and forth until he foregoes his slow pace, favoring a faster one. He abuses your swollen clit while you can only lay there and watch him play with you. Heeseung expertly inserts his middle finger into your seeping hole and bites his lip to concentrate on getting you to come again. 

“I need it,” he confesses, bringing his mouth to lick you as he adds another finger. “I need you to come for me again, baby. Can you do that for me?’

“Yes, Hee,” you pant. “I wanna come so badly.”

“You can do it, baby. You’ve been such a good girl tonight, giving me the best head and letting me make you come. I think you deserve to feel good.” 

“I do,” you nod rapidly. “Fuck, I think I’m coming.”

“That’s right,” he coos, hammering his digits into you while his tongue laps up the juices leaking from your pussy. “So good. You taste so fucking good. Give it to me.” 

He doesn't relent until he’s satisfied. Heeseung cleans the come from your lips as best he can while sneaking his hand to his cock, pumping himself as he tastes your orgasm on his tongue. 

“You’ve crazy,” you mutter as you settle from your high, loving the feeling of Heeseung’s mouth tenderly licking you clean. 

“For you.” He pulls his face away and wipes the back of his hand before pressing a kiss to your clit. 

When he rises to take his pants and boxers off, he sees you with your arm covering your face. 

“Are you doing okay?” 

“Perfect, actually,” you sigh. You remove your arm to see him with his cock in his hands and motion him to come towards the edge of the bed as you crawl on your knees before sitting upright to pull him into a searing kiss. 

“That might be the hottest thing I’ve ever seen you do,” Heeseung says against your mouth. “It’s better than porn, if I’m being honest.” 

You grab his cock and stroke him. “I’ll consider letting you take a video of me when we get back home if you fuck me right now.” 

“Turn around,” he says after an open-mouthed kiss.

You follow his instructions and he groans to himself as you present your perfect pussy to him again. Heeseung sinks to his knees and smacks your ass before shoving his tongue into your hole. He spreads your asscheeks apart and digs his nose against you, licking up the wetness and remnants of your orgasm like it’s his last meal. His tongue licks up your body until he finds your wrinkled muscle and presses a soft kiss to your tightest hole. 

The surprise comes to him when you moan softly. Your body doesn’t jerk away. Rather, you spread your legs further for him and Heeseung moans against your pussy before bringing his tongue to lick over the muscle again. 

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” he asks, dipping his tongue back in.

“Better than I imagined.” 

“You imagined my tongue in your ass, baby?” 

You nod. “I’ve always wanted to know what that feels like.” 

Heeseung doesn’t give you a verbal answer. Instead, he spits into your hole and watches it dribble down to your pussy, licking his way from your incredibly wet folds to your hole once again. He licks over the expanse with the surface of his tongue one, twice, three times before you’re whining for his cock. He wastes no time tearing open the condom and hurriedly places it on himself. 

The first stretch of his cock in your pussy makes him see Heaven. The sharp gasp that comes from your mouth is music to his ears and he’s careful to sink himself into you slowly, inch by inch until you’re telling him he can go further. 

His cock impales you at such a perfect angle that it has you falling to your elbows, your back arched so perfectly that he’s sure you’d be the most popular pornstar if you really wanted to be. He keeps half of his cock in you to allow you to adjust, but he underestimates just how cock hungry you are because you back yourself until he’s filling you to the brim.

“Baby’s such a slut, isn’t she?” Heeseung wonders out loud. He grins when you nod. “I love you like that. So dirty for me.” 

“Only for you,” you say, cheek pressed to the mattress when Heeseung thrusts in you. 

The sound of skin slapping echoes throughout the room. It doesn’t take long for your wet juices to glisten over the back of your thighs and onto Heeseung’s. His hands find purchase on your hips as he pulls your body close to him, loving the way your choked moans become muffled by the mattress below. 

“So. Fucking. Tight,” he moans with detailed thrusts. “So. Fucking. Wet.” 

He climbs on the bed and plants his feet on the blankets, holding your body in place as he pounds into you from above. The angle has you seeing stars and rips moan after moan from you. 

Heeseung grins wickedly. “Such a fuckable body. So perfect.” 

His degradation paired with praise ignites a fire inside of you. You can only moan louder to let Heeseung know exactly how he’s making you feel and you can’t help but think you deserved to be fucked exactly the way Heeseung is fucking you.

The pleasure feels like an explosion of a thousand suns. Your body is warm from the hours you’ve spent in the hotel room and your neighbors getting a good night’s sleep is the least of your concerns. Heeseung’s cock drills into you from above like he’s a sex god and it nearly brings you to tears. 

He turns you over carefully until you’re laying flat on your back with your head propped against the pillows. He steals one from you and puts it underneath the small of your back to create leverage before lining up his cock with your entrance and pushing himself in again.

Heeseung thrusts like he’s got to prove just how in love with you he is. Your wanton moans fill the room with his low grunts as his cock continually hits the one spot that makes you see stars, over and over again.

But you know he could do more to make you feel better. He must notice you in deep thought because he slows his hips. 

“What is it, baby?” Heeseung asks when he notices your eyebrows knit together. “Is this okay? Do you need me to stop so we can take a break?”

“Take it off,” you whisper. His hips have faltered and his pace stutters at your words.

“Take what off?”

“The condom.” Heeseung nearly chokes. “Take the condom off.” 

“Baby—”

“I just wanna feel you.” 

Heeseung curses and his hips automatically drill into yours at the request out of pure shock. He can’t lie to himself. He’s thought about it multiple times since you left for Europe and as he’s come to term with his feelings for you. The cute fantasies about taking you on dates to dinner or drive in theaters transform into daydreams about dirty affairs in his bedroom with his seed leaking out of your perfect hole. 

Still, he doesn’t believe it.

“Please, Hee,” you plead, arching your chest towards him. “Let me feel you. Don’t you want to come inside me?”

“Fuck,” he falters, his forehead on yours. “You can’t just say that…I can’t be risky with you.” 

“Yes you can.” He watches you bite your lip and feels your hands push him off of you. Heeseung doesn’t put up a fight when he slips out of your warm hole and feels your hands grip his cock, desperately trying to tug the condom off of him. 

Heeseung sees the pathetic rubber in your hands when you bring it up for him to see. It’s glistening and his mouth drools at the sight, lips parting enough as if he stares at it in disbelief. He groans lowly in your ear as he peppers a few wet kisses to your neck. 

You spread your legs wider in the air and grip his cock in your head, pumping him a few times before letting his bare tip rest against your hole. His sharp intake is enough to make you bite your lip. 

“Pussy’s so wet,” he says against your neck, pushing an inch inside of you. “God, I could come like this.”

“You can.” 

“No, baby. Gonna fuck you the way you deserve before I come.”

With that sentiment, Heeseung pushes himself inside of you until he’s fully sheathed within your walls. He relishes the way you gasp at the sudden movement and he uses this angle to his advantage, positioning his ear next to your mouth to hear your delicious sounds. 

He moves his hips at such a pace that it makes you feel like your body’s bouncing on top of the soft mattress below you. Heeseung presses his chest against yours to kiss you like his life depends on it, tongue invading the privacy of your mouth but you couldn’t care less where his mouth goes. He can feel your nipples on his skin and groans into your mouth when you clench at a particularly hard thrust. 

“S-So good,” you stutter against his mouth with a breathy moan. Heeseung feels your arm around his shoulders, scratching at his back. “Fuck, fuck!”

“Mhm,” he coaxed. “Such a good baby. You look so pretty underneath me.” 

With a new sense of purpose, Heeseung lifts himself to push himself into you at a deeper angle. He forces his hips into you harder, your hands coming to your chest to cup your tits to give you something to hold in the meantime.

“That’s right, beautiful. Squeeze your tits for me.” 

You do, pinching and twisting your nipples until you hear Heeseung moan above you. It sounds nearly animalistic, the way his throat emits a groan that sounds so primal. He sees the dirty smile you paint your mouth with and leans his head down to press a kiss to your forehead before his hand comes to your cheeks, squeezing them between my fingers.

“You like it when I fuck you like this?” Heeseung asks, hips rolling against your own pelvis. When you nod, he gives you a nasty smile of his own and gives you a few harsh thrusts for good measure before pulling himself off of your chest with his cock still inside of you. 

Heeseung sits on his knees and pulls out just far enough where his hot tip remains buried inside of you, relishing in the panty breaths you emit as he watches your chest rise and fall. You look so beautiful to him with your hair messed up against the pillow beneath you and with a few faint hickeys on your chest and neck. Heeseung thinks that all of his wildest dreams could never compare to how gorgeous you look when you’re positioned directly where he wants you. 

You don’t complain when he pulls out to rest his cock on your wet, bare pussy. You wince at the loss and let him slide himself up and down, biting your lip when he grazes your swollen clit over and over again. 

The man above you lifts your right leg so that he can grip you tighter. You relinquish any control left in your body as Heeseung curses and kisses the side of your ankle. He dips the head of his cock inside and thrusts shallowly as if to tease, but you know he’s exploring all the way his cock looks like against your own body. 

It feels euphoric. The whole affair is dirty, but it’s the kind of dirty that makes you want to do it again. It’s the kind of dirty that makes this night an event you’ll want to remember for the rest of your night because Heeseung had poured his entire heart and soul for you to take. 

For Heeseung, this pleasure is less about knowing you have him permission to put himself inside you. You’ve always been so sure of yourself and your body; it’s something Heeseung has always admired about you as a person. Growing up with your insecurities of relationships and dating might’ve made you feel like a late bloomer; to Heeseung, your tendency to keep your head straight has always been a testament to how knowledgeable you are about yourself and about others. You save yourself for people who are worthy of you, and god, does he want to be worthy of you.

“I love you,” Heeseung whispers from above you. His eyes are closed and he pays no mind to the feeling your pussy gives him. Flashes of your memories stitch together like a film reel with your laughter as the soundtrack. He doesn’t think he wants to hear anything else for the rest of his life. 

Just for good measure, he whispers it again. “I love you so much.” 

“And I love you.”

Heeseung opens his eyes to see your tender ones, cheeks flushed from the sudden compliment. He always liked that he knew how to get you to blush when no one else couldn’t. This time, a sense of pride blooms in his chest. 

“I’ll never let you down,” he confesses. “And if I do, I’ll make it up to you. I promise.” 

“I know, baby.” Heeseung’s hand cups your cheek and caresses it. “I trust you.” 

That’s enough for him to release your leg from his grip and pound himself into you like his life depends on bringing you to peak happiness. 

Heeseung’s palms are planted firmly on either side of your body as his hips roll gracefully against yours, the hot, wet mess between the two of you splashing on both of your thighs. He watches your eyes close shut and as your back arches to relieve some of the pressure, feeling somewhat proud of himself when he watches as your hands grab at the sheets for stability. 

There’s nothing that compares to watching you orgasm. Your eyebrows knit as if you’re concentrating while your mouth stands slightly ajar at the euphoric feeling of that single knot that’s threatening to come undone until it does. All of the girls he’s deluded into thinking he liked could never compare to the looks and sounds you’re making. 

“That’s it,” he coaxes softly. “Cream my cock, baby. That’s a good girl.” 

Heeseung feels you push and clench around him, gushing until there’s nowhere left for your come to go. He peeks down at where the two of you meet and groans when he sees his cock becoming painted in a sheer layer of white. It edges him on and the moment he locks his eyes with yours, his hips begin to stutter and he spills all he has to offer inside of you. 

He comes with short breaths as if he can’t believe you’ve allowed him to do so. Your hips move up and down as if to milk him for all he’s worth while Heeseung’s trying his best to balance his body on top of yours, grateful that some of his gym workouts prevent him from completely collapsing on top of you to.

His come seeps from your bodies and he pulls out, a few droplets splattering on your pussy lips. He nudges the tip against it, smearing his paint across your canvas and marveling at the sight. 

“My good girl,” he murmurs, eyes locked in at his handy work.

“I’ve never let anyone come inside of me,” you say with a fond expression. Your arm comes to brush Heeseung’s hair from his face before cradling his cheek when he looks at you in surprise. 

“Really?” 

You nod, biting your cheek. “Well, I always knew you were it for me. I didn’t want anyone else tainting what’s yours.” 

“Mine?” he asks, catching his breath. “You mean it? You’re mine.”

“I’m yours, Hee.” 

“All mine,” he mutters to himself in disbelief. 

You still feel his cock working itself against you. He’s still hard, a wonder after your hours locked away in your hotel room. It makes you laugh.

“No one has ever compared to you either,” Heeseung says. He doesn’t take his eyes off of you as he continues toying with your pussy. “Even when I fooled myself into thinking I didn’t like you.”

You laugh. “Well that’s good to hear. I realized all the guys I went after while I was abroad either looked like you or reminded me of you.” 

“I can confidently and stupidly say the same.” 

Your laughs echo through the room. Heeseung pulls your body upright, not caring that your mixed come is leaking on his cock and his bare lap. He kisses you with tender care, lips moving at a slow pace while his hands roam over the expanse of your back while your hands are on his broad shoulders. Heeseung could live like this everyday if you’d let him. 

You smile midway through when you feel his fully hardened cock against you. Heeseung apologizes quietly against your lips but feels you shake your head, pulling back to push him against the headboard until he’s comfortably seated. 

He looks at your pussy when you hover above him, the white cream still sticking to you as you grip his cock. Heeseung can’t believe his eyes when he understands what you’re about to do. Before he can even think, you align yourself with his cock and sink until you’re stuffed with him.

“Shit,” he curses through his teeth. 

“What good is coming inside of me if you don’t do it again and again, Hee?” 

“That might be the hottest thing you’ve ever said to me.” 

“Oh, yeah?”

You don’t move just yet, opting to press small kisses to Heeseung’s face. You kiss his forehead, both temples, his nose, both eyelids, and the apples of his cheeks before placing a kiss to his lips. 

“Before we leave, I want you to fuck me against that window,” you say, turning your head to the window that glimpses the city below. 

“But people can see,” is Heeseung’s first comment.

“So?” 

He chokes and when you feel his cock twitch inside of you, you can’t help but laugh at him.

“I’ve heard talk about your escapades, Lee. Why so shy with me?” 

He smacks your asscheek. “Naughty girl. Didn’t know you were nasty like that.” Heeseung gives you that kind of teasing smile that has you folding for him all over again. “Alright then, humor me. What else do you want to do before we leave?” 

“I’d love to give you a blowjob while we shower, too.” 

“That can certainly be arranged. Anything else?” 

You look around the room. “I kind of want to see you eat me out while I sit on the desk chair. Makes me think you’re some kind of secretary who’s desperate for my pussy.”

“I am desperate for your pussy,” Heeseung reminds you. “What if I’m the stone cold CEO and you’re the cute secretary whose ass I dream about?” 

You seat his chest. “This is my fantasy. You can have yours when we get home.” 

Heeseung raises his eyebrow. “Mm, you sure?”

“Positively,” you nod. Heeseung’s hands travel from your ass to your hips and guides you up and down his cock, letting you set the pace after the brutal first round from a few minutes prior. 

“Gonna fuck you in and on my car, since you like being watched so much,” Heeseung teases. His words seem to make your pussy clench and hips move faster. He forgoes any shyness when speaking about his fantasies and spills his every thought.

“I always thought you looked so cute in your old school uniform. I’ve always wanted to take you in that skirt they gave you.”

“I’ll buy one of those sexy schoolgirl costumes and surprise you for your birthday,” you say, locking your eyes with him. “Oh, professor! Is there anything I can do to raise my grade?”

Heeseung laughs at your antics, but the images of you in the costume aforementioned makes his grip on your body tighter. 

“I selfishly want to watch you suck me off while I play with the guys.” He says it in a way that makes him avert his gaze and you can see a faint blush on his face. “I-I saw this video on Twitter. It looks hot.”

“I can do that for you.” You kiss both of his burning cheeks.

“But mostly, I just want you to sit on my face. Mad at me? Sit on my face. Sad? Sit on my face. Happy to see me? Sit on my face.” 

“Simp,” you grunt, thighs burning from pushing yourself on and off of Heeseung’s cock. 

“And proud.” He smacks both ass cheeks again. “Now what do you say, baby? If you ride me until you come, you can blow me in the bathroom before I fuck you in front of the entirety of Paris. Can you do that for me?”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

The next morning, you meet Heeseung and the rest of the guys in the lobby while Jay checks out on behalf of all of you. Jake’s the first to see you coming. 

“You’re glowing and I don’t know if I like that.” He raises his eyebrow at Heeseung, who has pulled you into him by your waist. 

“At least some of us are getting laid,” you retort. “I don’t recall seeing anyone do the walk of shame even though you had the room to yourself.” 

Riki and Sunoo don’t try to contain their laughter as Jake’s cheeks turn a shade of pink. He rolls his eyes when you look at him, but shakes his head and punches your arm with your first. 

“Nah, I’m really glad you two got that out of your system and worked it out.”

“You guys had major sexual tension,” Sunoo comments. 

“Thank God Y/N’s room was at the end of the hall,” says Sunghoon. “I don’t know how their neighbors felt but I can sleep peacefully knowing I didn’t have to hear all of that.” 

“Okay, enough,” Heeseung laughs. “We get it, we had a lot of sexual tension and now we’re fine.”

“So you guys are boyfriend-girlfriend?” Jungwon asks. 

“Y/N is my girlfriend and I am her boyfriend.” 

“I will key his car if he hurts you again,” Riki tells you, looking at Heeseung after he’s finished speaking. You detach yourself from his waist and bring your arms around Riki to give him a squeeze.

“Thanks, Riki.”

“Okay, we should call the cabs right now so we can get to the airport early,” Jay says from behind you. 

“Jay is such a dad,” Jungwon whispers. 

He pays no mind to Jungwon’s words, instead focusing on the way Heeseung pulls you into his chest. It warms his heart in ways he can’t explain.

“Congratulations, you two. Let’s go home.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

add yourself to my masterlist !!

taglist: @baevsxii @lillotus17 @syzavxy @mrmld @nikilvrfvr.

[viewwrangler]

And coronavirus claims its first major US sporting event in ... tennis? tennis.

2020 BNP Paribas Open tennis tournament canceled because of outbreak of coronavirus (cbssports.com)

In the latest development, an ATP and WTA Tour tennis tournament has been shut down, making it the first major sports event in the U.S. to be canceled because of the outbreak. Late on Sunday night, the 2020 BNP Paribas Open issued a press release saying this year's event will not take place because the Coachella Valley in California is now under a public health emergency:

The Riverside County Public Health Department has declared a public health emergency for the Coachella Valley after a confirmed case of coronavirus (COVID-19) locally. As a result, the 2020 BNP Paribas Open will not take place at this time due to concerns surrounding the coronavirus and the safety of the participants and attendees at the event. This is following the guidance of medical professionals, the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), and State of California.

Tournament director Tommy Haas indicated that they will try to hold the tournament at a later date.

To be sure, it is only sensible, given the situation. At a guess, one of the deciding factors is the international nature of the event, with people coming in from places known to have comparatively widespread infection. It wouldn’t be just an issue of people bringing the virus in; they’d also be circulating with each other and then taking it back out again. (Mostly to Miami, which was originally the next stop on the tour. Florida has reported 13 cases and 2 deaths, which isn’t yet enough for a declaration of emergency. For now. That said, Miami and environs have experienced a wave of cancellations of smaller events due to coronavirus. [miamiherald.com])

All eyes now turn to the NCAA men’s basketball tournament, which has subregionals in Sacramento and Spokane (Washington state and California combined have over half of the currently known cases) and regionals in Los Angeles and New York (which has a hefty percentage of the known cases on its own). Getting a huge crowd of people together in areas where comparatively widespread community transmission is known seems ... unwise at this time. Especially since that would be replicating the Indian Wells tournament situation on a smaller, mostly domestic scale: people coming in from other states to support their team, maybe bringing the virus with them, circulating circulating circulating, going back home and taking someone else’s virus with them, and nobody realizing for two weeks that it’s even happened.

It’s more difficult to see what will happen with the NCAA women’s basketball tournament because of how it’s set up. The top 16 seeds would normally host a “pod” of four teams on their campus. Until all of the entrants are known, nobody can be sure where those pods will be. Oddly enough, that looks to make it a bit safer than the men’s tournament. As of today, for example, the only hosts that look even slightly problematic are Maryland (both nearby DC and Baltimore experiencing outbreaks) and Gonzaga (Spokane, Washington state), The rest of the top 16 seems to be in areas experiencing little or no coronavirus. That said, you still have the whole “people coming in from elsewhere and going back there” issue.

Given that the Coachella valley itself is now under a public health emergency declaration, one wonders what will happen with the Coachella/Stagecoach festival. For now, it’s still on (patch.com) -- I guess organizers are hoping that a month from now, things will have stabilized. Of course, if they haven’t -- and normal epidemiological models suggest that things are only getting started -- the longer they wait, the more difficult cancellation gets.

We shall see, I suppose.

Of course, the big sporting event with a virus-laden target on its back right now is the 2020 Tokyo Olympics. Not only is it in a country with a current active outbreak (nhk.or.jp), but it would be almost guaranteed to be a nexus of further spread, just because of the nature of the games. Assuming, of course, that the disease isn’t controlled by then. People have been hoping that warm weather will limit its spread as spring and summer come to the northern hemisphere, as happens with colds, some of which are caused by less intense coronaviruses. The spread of COVID-19 coronavirus in tropical Singapore and Hong Kong, and hot and dry Australia in its summer both argue against that possibility. Currently, the IOC and Tokyo Olympic Organizing Committee are in full “the games shall go on as scheduled” mode ... in public.

But again, we shall see.

[princess-pill-enjoyer]

#19

Took 150 cause my mind would not stop thinking about it. I figure that's enough to feel something off it but not where I'm out of commission.

AFTERMATH

Took another 150 and I did that weird don't feel like I'm high thing. My throat has been burning from all the pills I swallow. My stomach is really not appreciating it. I didn't really eat yesterday either. It lowkey slipped my mind. Ig not eating plus constantly belching has cured my bloating for a bit. Very weird buut hey you know. es what it es. Aside from that no real symptoms. Just my stomach being fussy

NOTES/EMOTIONS

Yeah uh. Most definitely spiraling now. I'm taking them so often compared to the beginning when I thought I'd still be getting off them soon. I kinda see why? Money problems.. again

The place I interviewed for didn't call back afterall. I thought I had it in the bag but noope. I'm officially starting this work from home call shit soon. I need the money atp. My student loan shit is finally charging me as it's been 6 months since I've been in school. So that's 77 right there. Then my university finally got their shit together and changed the amount I owed to like 2k which is a lot better.. only thing is the most the most they'll allow you to stretch it out to is 12 months so I have to pay them 200 every month. Plus I was kinda counting on the rest of my birthday money to pay off this shit I borrowed on cashapp.

I like to borrow the junk on there when I know I'll be getting the money/have the money to pay it off soon after as they increase my borrow limit when I do that. I've gone from my max being like $20 to now I have a limit of... I believe 125? Not that I ever really need it but it's nice to know in a pinch I have 125 of "free" money that I have about a month to pay back. It's helped me out so many times. I was buying this mirror and I didn't realize my spotify subscription already renewed for the month so I didn't have enough on me to buy the mirror technically. BUTT I borrowed like $30 for it and the other bs I was getting, paid it off like 4 days later then boom more money available. It's been going good aside from two incidents.

I'm sure I wrote about it in my intro but basically I started balling out the week I thought I was gonna kill myself cause I figured it didn't really matter and I'm sure if they explained it to them they'd cancel the shit. And even if not, I mean it was like what... $100? It wouldn't be that big of a deal either way. But then I ended up staying so that was a thingg. I never thought I'd be there to that point so I fr didn't have the money to pay it like.. at all. I got lucky the like final final day it was due was 2 days after my birthday so with the birthday money I got I could pay it off. This time was kinda the same?

I bought this figurine I've been looking at for months now out of like.. I'm gonna get it anyway. I've been wanting it and talking about it since prolly like. December now. And I didn't have enough on my card but I thought that was fine cause I had like $150 in cash so I was just gon go to the bank and boom. Only to be a dumbass and buy shit the times I had to sit at the mall for my sister. Then I went to pride and spent the little bit I had left on food. I kinda thought my aunt would pay for me too as she invited me and like.. not THAT damn grown but nope. I ended up spending $70 on food alone and then the rest of it went to getting into this one club and these stickers I bought to support this group working to get better conditions in animal shelters and stop dogs from getting put down over small shit that's mostly on the owner. The stickers were $6 already which stung a ilttle but what really killed me is the damn club

Sigh. I won't get into specifics cause I've already been babbling and I still have a lot to say. Basically, my aunt let me smoke her weed with her but it was so so strong and 3 hours later I was still kinda gone. I wanted to go to sleep but the motel we (me, my aunt, and her bsf) were staying at for the night was hella shady and they didn't want to leave me there on my own. So they sent me in the gas station to buy an energy drink and I was just to.. keep it pushing so they could go to the club. But since I'm a "minor" I got charged $10 extra. I'm 19 so I'm assuming they just call anyone that can't drink a minor? But that was already bad enough. I paid $30 in this short amount of time but I'm just like alr. Never been to a club before maybe it'll be worth it? No.

They literally went to the bathroom and I wasn't allowed to be alone so I had to shuffle around with them the whole time when I didn't even have to pee. But after standing in line and getting situated for like 20 mins we grouped up and shimmied our way through the crowd only for them to decide it was wack then we went to the outside part and just sat there pretty much alone. It was so fucking annoying. I'm not a huge partier my damn self but they were entirely too focused on fitting in. I'll admit that yeah, we did stick out alot. There were mostly hispanic ppl there and the music they were playing was in spanish and shit but at the same point? Why not make our own fun it woulda been 10x better than just sitting in the back and striking up 5 min convos with randoms. I wanted to go back in but atp.. I knew they'd say no to me going in on my own and I didn't wanna force them to be in an uncomfortable situation for my sake.

But yeah overall. $100 in food and stupid shit. I wasn't expecting to spend like absolutely nothing but I wasn't planning for that all to be gone either. Losing that money kinda screwed me. I really don't have any money like... at all. I have about $11 on my card and $14 in loose cash.. and I have to come up with $300 by next weekish. I have to pay back the money I borrowed for the figurine and I have to pay my 200 for my university debt. I really don't want to talk to my parents about it. I know they're gonna be mad and tbh I can't blame them. I should've saved some of it and I shouldn't be planning my money that hard that one event can royally screw me like that. That $200 they're supposed to give me is one thing. I wasn't expecting to not have that and I wasn't expecting my uni to want $200 a month at minimum. But the $125 I owe? Entirely on me and I just... I don't want them to rub it in rn

Uh money shit and my best friend lately. I dunno. I feel like she's a whole different person nowadays. And the more I think on our talk before the more I'm losing my feelings. Or that's what I think it is.

I've always had a problem with feeling abandoned and ever since my childhood. Dad and step mom used to be in their room 24/7. We'd do big stuff together and everything and that was nice and all but when it came to just spending time with us?? Almost never. We used to beg them to play with us all the time and they'd say yeah and just forget. Everytime. They rarely just played with us just cause. We had to beg and bother them so much for it. They always had to have some big ass event and all this special shit to care to spend time with us and it's just.. we just wanted to spend time with yall.

My mom mom wasn't much better tbh. She didn't really talk to me unless she was telling me what chores or basic, basic shit. Back when I was doing the two years on two years off thing, she actually never called either. I kinda forgot she was my mom at times. I used to be alone a lot too. When I lived with her, she had to work during the day but when she got back she would just go off and do her on thing. Even on her days off tbr. I'd be alone all the time. I used to try to ask her to play with me too but oftentimes I was on my own anyway

All that shit just made me hypersensitive to abandonment. I grew to hate that they could just withhold their love and affection until they felt like it. And when they did half the time it was some big giant thing. It made me feel like they were doing it more for the act of doing it than being with us you know?

I never want to have that again. I never want to be in a position to beg someone to give me attention. To love me. I'm just tired of doing it.

R is kind of putting me in that position nowadays. We don't talk as much, we don't "hang out" (I mean we're in completely diff states so not exactly exactly hanging out), we just occasionally joke around and parrot out the same old same old. I've talked to her about how much it bothers me on multiple occasions and she hasn't changed things at all. It just makes me feel so stupid. All this time I thought possibly we had the same feelings for each other but it must've meant literally nothing to her. She said that she would treat her girlfriend "like she treated me" which has been eating me up. She knows what she's doing atp and she's too busy kekeing with her girl to care.

I'm just completely done. I've spoken my piece and things haven't changed. I refuse to let anyone dangle their love over my head whenever they feel like it. Including her. I'm tired of always having this happen and I'm done trying to improve our relationship. You can't just cast me to the side as you please and expect to come back to the same closeness. You're just blatantly telling me you don't care. I don't ask for much. I just want to spend some time with her time to time whether it's playing a game together, having actual conversations instead of the constantly on 10 hehe haha bs, or the occasional call just to catch up. But nah. I see how it is atp

I'm just ready her to snap out her trance cause atp it's ridiculous and I don't get how she doesn't see it. Her girlfriend gets so possessive and insecure to the point where she really can't maintain any friendships period. I swear she wants R to give her attention 25/7 and whenever she doesn't get it she's worried that she likes them better.

God I'm just. I can't talk about this anymore. One one hand her girlfriend is so fucking manipulative and R shouldn't feel this much pressure to keep a tunnel vision on her. Or give up on everything she likes to do to appease her. Or feel such a fucking rush to get through all the relationship milestones all in one go. But on the other hand, R isn't blameless either. She knows how much this affects me and she promised that she would never let her girlfriend get in between us but now look at us. You've ignored everything I said to appease your partner. I don't need your attention all the damn time but I wish you would stop treating me as the aftrthought. I shouldn't have to beg to hang out with my friend. That's all I'm asking. I want you to actually want to fucking talk to me instead of doing it cause you're used to it. Cause you said you would. You don't care about how distant we've gotten cause for you you can just get it from your girl right? You don't care about how it makes me feel. You're all about your partner and I just have to accept whatever breadcrumbs of shallow conversation you decide to throw me. And I'm supposed to stay the same towards you or it hurts your feelings..?

lol. when you don't tend to your friendships we grow apart. Don't get mad about that. Why do you always get jealous aand worried about me replacing you when thats literally what you did to me? Am I meant to be eagerly waiting for you when I have friends that genuinely care to keep in touch? And even the ones that only occasionally talk to me, we at least don't pretend that we're close. We catch up, chill for a little while, and gon about our day.

I'm just. imm done talking about this. its never fully satisfying. i astill have so much to say but. at the end of the day. just. done. im crying atp and i just want more pills

[rougedraconteur]

Does anyone think this could now be part of a larger announcement? I am wondering if this actual concert (Elsie 2022), the location, even the performers, could somehow be tied to and now become part of filming a Glee reboot. (Don’t ask me if I want it, that’s not what this post is about. For the record, I don’t. But I am allowed to consider it might happen anyway, and hopeful that it might not be a disaster, if D participates.)

As in, Blaine’s future career, in the decade since Glee, or some part of it. A performance on stage filmed as it happens. This whole reboot could be partially filmed like a documentary, on the cheap, using excerpts from some actual events, to reduce the cost of what was always wildly expensive episodes to film. If so, (and there was some content we got saying D was working with LM on a reboot and acquiring rights to songs), then this could be part of the Disney Day announcements the end of this week, starting tomorrow actually, and going through this month for shareholders and fans. It could be part of either Disney+ special content or mini-series, or for Hulu, and possibly tied to a holiday release, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s? since limited episodes (I think four were mentioned?) were supposed to be available. Maybe they would be two hour movies. Not saying it is happening that way, but it feels like this is where something like that would be announced. And Disney absolutely would pull rank over everything else and shut down any reveals if it suited their purposes.

RM was at LM’s Funny Girl premiere this week, along with Jon Groff, with photos, and there were folks commenting that RM was living a real-life version of Rachel’s story on Glee. But Glee is NOT a documentary, right? Unless it is, sort of.

So would he film around that show? It would pick up exactly where they left off in that last episode, the “10 years later” one. He used to own the rights to Funny Girl, and has worked with those producers and the director. He could arrange for a dress rehearsal shoot. If the reboot happens, no way they don’t feed off some of her publicity from this show anyway.

So, why not do the same for D’s annual concert? Perhaps RM would provide some funding of the location and the participants, helping offset D’s costs, and it would explain why C has made two public singing appearances this past year, after such a long silence. I have not attended Elsie, but even I would want to see these two sing together again if that was even a remote possibility. Plus, a ready excuse for C toperform live there, without destroying the current narrative. Kevin hasn’t performed there, nor has Amber. Harry and Heather haven’t danced there. Even if it was “problematic” for numerous obvious reasons for fans of each, D and C, especially long-time fans, it would be really hard to resist, especially if we got new songs to add to the canon of solos and duets and group numbers. I would think newbies would eat it up, as they totally live in a separate reality from the rest of Glee fandom.

Again, not saying it WILL happen, but RM and DC have made inroads at Disney, as of last year, and they should have C’s contract for TLOS from the Fox purchase in either some stage of development or in danger of cancellation. Or on hold. Perhaps if he participates in a reboot, which seems unlikely atp, but not impossible, his TLOS project can move forward, or be released from limbo to develop elsewhere, like Netflix.

Expecting to be chewed out by someone for even raising the thought, but right or wrong (and I am fine with being wrong, it happens to everyone, and we will know soon enough) but this situation is unusual, this is just one possibility, and it is odd we have gotten nothing else from either the reboot or Elsie, after some fits and starts. But Disney takes their D23 very seriously, and I can see them locking down anything to give them more buzz. If D has taken on any other projects with them, then it could interrupt his schedule to the point that he has no work-around, but can’t announce yet per contracts.

Also, we should get something on Nat Geo, another Disney product now, from Derek Hough, for a world travel series focused on dancing around the world. I think a similar series focused on music would be perfect for D. He should be in the Tower of Terror movie, imo, and I so want him to star in a Muppet feature or one of the Enchanted movies. A dream for him would be a Star Wars series, even a small but notable part, and as we know he did meet Taika earlier, alongside his old pal Ash/ley Ben/son; TW is developing some Star Wars offshoot series based on worlds not directly in alignment with the stories we saw with Luke Skywalker et. al. So new stories with totally new characters.

Perhaps we get a new season of Hollywood on Fx, or a new season of American Love Stories: JFK, Jr. and Carolyn. D would be so perfect to play John-John. My choice would be Dian/na Ag/ron to play CB, but Juli/anne Hou/gh could also pull it off. RM is also supposed to have A Chorus Line in his pocket somewhere, when we talk dance. If RM gets out of his Netflix contract, this could then become a Disney product, otherwise his Fox and Fx products belong to Disney.

Maybe we get one of these, or some of this, maybe we strike it rich as fans, maybe we get nothing. But we will know soon enough if any of this happens re:The Mouse House. I am betting on Da/na Wal/den to put his contract in play.

The elsie situation is embarrassing

But most of all it’s just sad.

[ladystylestores]

Coronavirus: What sporting events are affected by the pandemic? | News

The outbreak of the novel coronavirus, which as of May 21 has killed more than 329,000 people  globally, has affected sporting events across the world.

As the number of confirmed coronavirus cases worldwide has surged past five million, major sporting events have been cancelled or postponed.

The most significant one that was due to take place in Japan this summer was the Tokyo 2020 Olympics.

More:

However, the International Olympic Committee and Japan’s Prime Minister Shinzo Abe have postponed the��event to next year, where it will now take place from July 23 to August 8, 2021.

Football

In South Korea, the football league season restarted on May 8 after several weeks of postponement, with reigning champions Jeonbuk Motors hosting Suwon Bluewings in an empty World Cup Stadium in Jeonju.

The Major League Soccer (MLS) top-tier football league in the US has extended its postponement of matches in the country until at least June 8 due to the coronavirus pandemic.

On April 12, the Confederation of African Football (CAF) announced the postponement of the two-legged semi-finals of the African Champions League that were supposed to take place in May.

“In light of growing concerns and evolving nature on COVID-19 (that has led to a) lockdown in most countries, the CAF Emergency Committee has decided to postpone the matches until further notice,” a statement said.

The CONCACAF (Confederation of North, Central American and Caribbean Association Football) Nations League Finals, which were scheduled for June 4 to June 7, have been suspended. The finals, due to be contested by Costa Rica, Honduras, Mexico and the United States and held in the Houston and Dallas areas of Texas, will be rescheduled for a later date in venues to be determined.

Football in Russia has been suspended until April 10. The Russian league was the best-attended sports competition still operating in Europe last weekend, with more than 33,000 fans at one of its games, but the Russian Football Union agreed to immediately suspend all competitions at a meeting on March 17.

In Germany, the top-flight Bundesliga resumed its season on May 16 behind closed doors after a two-month hiatus. 

The African Nations Championship 2020  tournament scheduled for April in Cameroon has been postponed indefinitely, the African Football Federation said in a statement on March 17.

This year’s Copa America has been postponed until 2021, the South American Football Confederation (CONMEBOL) said on March 17. The 12-team tournament had originally been scheduled to take place from June 12 to July 12 in Colombia and Argentina.

The Euro 2020 tournament has been postponed until 2021, European football’s governing body UEFA said in a statement on March 17. UEFA said that the 24-team tournament, which was due to be staged in 12 nations across the continent from June 12 to July 12 this year, would now take place from June 11 to July 11, 2021. 

On April 23, UEFA also postponed the Euro 2021 Women’s championship, and it will now be played in England from July 6 to July 31, in the same venues that were originally proposed to host the event.  

Meanwhile in England, all elite football has been suspended until at least April 30.

Europa League match between Inter Milan and Ludogorets was played in an empty stadium in Milan, Italy [Emilio Andreoli/Reuters]

UEFA on April 1 suspended all Champions League and Europa League matches “until further notice”.

All national team games scheduled for June have also been postponed.

FIFA and the Asian Football Confederation have agreed to postpone the Asian World Cup qualifying matches in March and June.

New seasons in the Chinese, Japanese and South Korean professional leagues have been postponed.

Asian Champions League matches involving Chinese clubs Guangzhou Evergrande, Shanghai Shenhua and Shanghai SIPG have been postponed. The start of the knockout rounds has been moved back to September.

The Confederation of African Football has postponed two rounds of the 2021 Africa Cup of Nations qualifiers scheduled for March 25-31.

An exhibition match between Mexico and Colombia on May 30 at Denver has been cancelled.

The three divisions of England’s National League have also been suspended indefinitely.

The rest of the Dutch football league has been cancelled and leading team Ajax will not be declared the champion.

Marathons

The London Marathon, which was scheduled to take place on April 26, has been postponed until October 4.

The Boston Marathon, originally scheduled for April 4, is now expected to take place on September 14.

Amsterdam, Paris and Barcelona marathons have also been postponed. 

In Japan on March 1, the Tokyo Marathon, which usually attracts 300,000 participants, was restricted to only 200 elite runners.

Combination photos show how runners fill the street at the start of the Tokyo Marathon 2019 in Tokyo, Japan in this March 3, 2019, right, and runners start at the Tokyo Marathon 2020 in Tokyo, Japan on March 1, 2020 [Kyodo/via Reuters]

Olympic Games

The International Olympic Committee and Japan’s Prime Minister Shinzo Abe have concluded the Tokyo 2020 Olympics must be postponed.    

The decision was made after holding out for weeks as local organisers and the IOC came under increasing pressure from athletes, national Olympic bodies and sports federations.

The event will now take place from July 23 to August 8, 2021. 

Athletics

The traditional Berlin athletics meeting, ISTAF, will not take place without spectators later this year if coronavirus restrictions remain in place, organisers have said. The 79th edition of the event is scheduled for September 13, but meeting director Martin Seeber said he is planning a potential cancellation and wants a decision by mid-June.

The World Athletics Championships scheduled to take place in Oregon in August 2021 have been pushed back to July 2022 to avoid clashing with the rescheduled Olympic Games, the sport’s governing body said on April 8. 

The Diamond League postponed its first five meetings of the 2020 season due to be held in April and May in Qatar, China, Stockholm, Naples and Rabat.

World Athletics said in a statement that it “approved the new dates this week after extensive discussions with the sport’s stakeholders.”

The World Athletics Indoor Championships, scheduled for Nanjing from March 13-15, have been postponed until next year.

Formula 1

The Hungarian Formula One Grand Prix, which was scheduled originally for August 2, can only take place without spectators, organisers said

Formula One plans to start its season behind closed doors in Austria from July 3-5, followed by the British Grand Prix at Silverstone under similar conditions, but has yet to publish a revised calendar.

The Azerbaijan Grand Prix became the latest postponement in the calendar, meaning there will be no Formula One races until the middle of June at the earliest.

The race at the Baku City Circuit was scheduled for June 7.

Formula 1 cancelled the season-opening Australian GP after a McLaren team member contracted the coronavirus. The race was scheduled to take place on March 15. 

The Bahrain Grand Prix and the Vietnam Grand Prix have been postponed. Those events were first scheduled to take place on March 20-22 and April 3-5 respectively.

The Bahrain Grand Prix in Manama was due to be held without fans before organisers decided to postpone the race [File: Thaier Al-Sudani/Reuters]

The Chinese Grand Prix in Shanghai, which was scheduled to take place on April 19, was also called off. 

Races in the Netherlands, Spain and Monaco in May have all been postponed, the governing motorsport body FIA said on March 19. 

Formula 1 Canadian Grand Prix organisers announced on April 7 that the race in Montreal that was supposed to kick off the 2020 World Championship calendar will be postponed until further notice. 

The French Formula 1 Grand Prix scheduled for June 28 at Le Castellet has been cancelled due to the COVID-19 pandemic, organisers said on April 27.

Racing

The Indianapolis 500 scheduled for May 24 has been postponed until August 23 and will not run on Memorial Day weekend for the first time since 1946.

The French MotoGP initially scheduled for May 15-17 in Le Mans, was postponed because of the “ongoing coronavirus outbreak”, organisers announced on April 2.

Tennis

The International Tennis Federation (ITF) said 900 tournaments across all its circuits had been postponed and that it was furloughing half its staff.

The ITF’s revamped Fed Cup Finals was one of the high-profile events postponed. It was supposed to have taken place this month in Budapest.

The 2020 Wimbledon tennis championships have been cancelled because of the coronavirus pandemic, the All England Club announced on April 1.

It is the first time the championships, due to take place between June 28 and July 11, have been called off since World War II.

The professional tennis tour – men’s and women’s – has been suspended until June 7, with all clay-court tournaments in Europe cancelled. ATP and WTA rankings have been frozen until further notice. 

Joint WTA/ @atptour Announcement:

All ATP and WTA tournaments in the Spring clay court swing will not be held as scheduled.

The professional tennis season is now suspended through June 7, 2020 –> https://t.co/IYR6A2pI05 pic.twitter.com/qHOlmohWbq

— WTA (@WTA) March 18, 2020

The US Women’s Open in Houston has been postponed from the end of spring to the middle of December.

The USGA said that the rapid development of COVID-19 has led the Women’s Open at Champions Golf Club to be postponed. Instead of being held June 4-7, the new date is December 10-13.

The French Open has been postponed until September 20 – October 4, organisers said on March 17. The clay-court major was originally scheduled to be played from May 24-June 7.

There was also disappointment for tennis fans in California as the BNP Paribas Open in Indian Wells was cancelled.

Also cancelled were the Xi’an Open, scheduled for April 13 to 19, and Kunming Open, pencilled for April 27 to May 3. Both events were to take place in China.

In the United Kingdom, the Main Board of the All England Club (AELTC) and the Committee of Management of The Championships on April 1 decided to cancel the Wimbledon grasscourt Grand Slam, formally known as The Championships 2020. The 134th Championships will instead be staged from 28 June to 11 July 2021.

Boxing

The world boxing heavyweight title fight between Briton Anthony Joshua and the IBF’s mandatory challenger Kubrat Pulev of Bulgaria originally scheduled for June 20 has been postponed, promoters said.

The Tokyo Olympic boxing qualifiers for Asia and Oceania were moved to Jordan from China.

However, the European, American and final world qualifying boxing tournaments for the Olympic Games have been suspended, the International Olympic Committee said.

Briton Anthony Joshua’s world heavyweight title defence against Bulgarian Kubrat Pulev would probably take place at the end of the year instead of June 20 at Tottenham Hotspur’s stadium in London as scheduled.

Basketball

On May 19, the German basketball league (BBL) has been given permission by the regional Bavarian government to conclude its season   with a 10-team tournament in Munich’s Audi Dome in the first weekend of June.

The National Basketball Association (NBA) said on March 11 that it was suspending the season until further notice after a Utah Jazz player tested positive for the virus.

The WNBA draft will be a virtual event this year. The women’s league announced that its draft will still be held on April 17 as originally scheduled, but without players, fans or media in attendance due to the coronavirus pandemic.

WNBA postpones start of 2020 regular season

The Women’s National Basketball Association (WNBA) postponed the 2020 regular season as coronavirus continues spreading rapidly across the US and the world.

“As developments continue to emerge around the COVID-19 pandemic, including the extension of the social distancing guidelines in the United States through April 30, the WNBA will postpone the start of its training camps and the tip of the regular season originally scheduled for May 15,” the WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert said in a statement late Friday.

“While the league continues to use this time to conduct scenario-planning regarding new start dates and innovative formats, our guiding principle will continue to be the health and safety of the players, fans and employees,” she added.

Rugby

World Rugby’s governing body announced on May 15 it has postponed all test matches scheduled for July due to travel curbs and health protocols implemented to halt the spread of the novel coronavirus.

It was too early to determine whether matches in the November window would be affected at this stage, it added, with a decision contingent on advice from governments and health organisations.

In France, the country’s rugby federation said on March 13 that it was suspending all of its competitions due to the outbreak.

At least three Six Nations matches have been postponed.

The women’s Six Nations game between Scotland and France was postponed after a Scottish player tested positive for coronavirus.

The Singapore and Hong Kong legs of the World Rugby Sevens Series have been postponed from April to October.

MotoGP

The opening two rounds of the season in Qatar, which were scheduled for March 6-8, did not go ahead. The Thailand race, due to be held on March 22, has been postponed.

April rounds in Texas and Argentina have been pushed back to November. 

The Spanish Grand Prix scheduled for May 3 has also been postponed. It is the fifth MotoGP race to be cancelled or postponed due to the coronavirus. 

Table tennis

The world championships in Busan, South Korea, have been pushed back provisionally from March to June. 

The April 21 to 26 World Tour Japan Open in Kitakyushu has been postponed.

Golf

On May 14, the PGA Tour said testing for the novel coronavirus and daily temperature checks will be a mandatory feature of the return of professional golf in the US on June 11 with the Charles Schwab Challenge in Fort Worth, Texas. 

The Saudi Ladies International, the first women’s professional golf event to be staged in Saudi Arabia, has been rescheduled for October 8-11 after it was postponed due to the coronavirus pandemic, organisers have confirmed.

The 2020 Masters Tournament has been provisionally rescheduled for November 12-15, Augusta National Golf Club has said.

The 149th Open Championship due to be played at Royal St George’s from July 16-19 has been cancelled. “The R&A has decided to cancel The Open in 2020 due to the current Covid-19 pandemic,” the governing body said in a statement, adding that “the Championship will next be played at Royal St George’s in 2021”.

The KLPGA Championship at the Lakewood Country Club in Yangju, South Korea was held without spectators [Lee Jin-man/AP]

 The Trophee Hassan II in Morocco from June 4-7 was postponed and the Scandinavian Mixed tournament in Stockholm was cancelled and will now be played in 2021.

The Honda LPGA Thailand event and the HSBC Women’s World Championship in Singapore have been cancelled.

The Maybank Championship in Kuala Lumpur and the China Open have been postponed.

The Indian and China opens have both been postponed.

The Evian Masters women’s golf tournament has been moved to August.

The Dubai Duty Free Irish Open announced on March 30 that it would be postponed due to the ongoing coronavirus pandemic. The European Tour confirmed that the event, scheduled for 28-31 May at Mount Juliet, has been postponed following “consultation with all stakeholders”.

Cycling

The road cycling European championships scheduled for September in the Italian province of Trentino have been postponed by a year, the Union Europeenne de Cyclisme (UEC) said on May 3.

The three-week Tour de France, scheduled for June 27, will now start on August 29 and will finish on September 20.

The Tour could not start as scheduled in the Riviera city of Nice because French President Emmanuel Macron cancelled all public events with large crowds through mid-July in response to the coronavirus pandemic.

Top one-day cycling races Paris-Roubaix and Liege-Bastogne-Liege have been postponed, organisers said on March 17. Paris-Roubaix and Liege-Bastogne-Liege, which were due to be held on April 12 and 26 respectively, are two of the five “Monument” races of the cycling calendar with the Tour of Flanders, Milan-Sanremo and the Tour of Lombardy.

The Tour of Flanders and Milan-Sanremo have already been postponed. A new date has yet to be set for the races.

The final two stages of the UAE Tour were cancelled after two Italian participants tested positive for the coronavirus.

Four teams have pulled out of several cycling races in Italy.

The Giro d’Italia start on May 9 in Budapest has been postponed. A new start date will not be determined until at least April 3.

Meanwhile, British Cycling will furlough around a third of its staff in April and May due to the financial impact of the pandemic. 

On April 13, the Turkish Cycling Federation announced all cycling competitions to be held in Turkey until June have been postponed.

All scheduled activities until June 6 are postponed to a later date because of the coronavirus pandemic. New racing calendar will be announced later, the federation said in a statement.

Baseball

The final qualification tournament for the Olympics in Taiwan has been postponed from April to June.

Japan and South Korea professional league has postponed the start of the new season.

Major League Baseball (MLB), the US’s professional baseball league, suspended its “spring training”, a period in the off-season that features practices and exhibition games that allow trainers to test new players on different teams.

The MLB also delayed its opening day, which was scheduled for March 26, for at least two weeks. 

MLB games scheduled to be played in Mexico City and San Juan, Puerto Rico, are cancelled. 

  NCAA

The National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) cancelled scheduled games for both men and women on Thursday afternoon.

The NCAA organises all sports for athletes in university, an important league that showcases young talent to recruiters for professional sports in the US. 

The cancellation extends to all championships scheduled in the spring, including hockey, baseball and lacrosse.

Cricket

England’s two-match test series in Sri Lanka, which has been postponed and rescheduled for January next year, Sri Lanka Cricket (SLC) CEO Ashley de Silva said. England were scheduled to play tests in Galle and Colombo in March before the coronavirus outbreak.

The men’s Cricket World Cup Challenge League A, scheduled to begin on March 16 in Malaysia, has been postponed.

The start of the Indian Premier League T20 tournament (March 29) was postponed until April 15.

The Pakistan Cricket Board announced that Pakistan Super League matches in Karachi will be played with no spectators in the stadium.

England’s two-match test series in Sri Lanka scheduled to start on March 19 was postponed.

Australia’s proposed test tour of Bangladesh in June has been postponed and both boards will work together to find new dates to reschedule the series.

Judo

The International Judo Federation cancelled all Olympic qualification events through to the end of April.

Weightlifting

The Asian Championships, scheduled to take place in Uzbekistan from April 16 to 25, have been cancelled.

Winter sports

The International Ski Federation cancelled the final races of the men’s Alpine skiing World Cup.

The World Cup finals in Cortina were cancelled along with the last three women’s races in Are.

The women’s world ice hockey championships in Canada were cancelled.

The Ice Hockey World Championship scheduled for Switzerland in May was cancelled.

The speed skating world championships in Seoul were postponed until at least October.

The March 16-22 world figure skating championships in Montreal were cancelled.

The Kontinental Hockey League (KHL) has cancelled the remainder of its season after temporarily suspending its playoffs.

Australian Rules

The AFL game between St Kilda Saints and Port Adelaide Power scheduled for May 31 in China has been moved to Melbourne.

NHL 

The National Hockey League, primarily based in the US but with teams from Canada, suspended its season indefinitely on March 12. 

Wrestling

The Asian Olympic qualifying event from March 27-29 was moved from Xi’an, China to Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan.

On February 29, Kyrgyzstan withdrew as host.

Horse racing 

The Dubai World Cup, one of the world’s richest horse races and a premier annual sporting event in the United Arab Emirates, scheduled for March 28, has been postponed to next year, Dubai’s government media office tweeted on March 22.

The 146th running of the Kentucky Derby has been moved to September 5. It will be the first time the world-renowned horse race will not run on the first Saturday in May since 1945, when it was moved because of World World II.

Estimated revenue losses of various sports [Alia Chughtai/Al Jazeera]

Badminton

The final qualification tournament in Taiwan for the Olympics was put back from April to June 17-21, while the March 22-26 qualification event in Arizona was postponed.

Japan’s professional league postponed the start of the season.

Badminton’s Thomas and Uber Cup Finals being staged in Aarhus, Denmark, have been postponed from May 16-24 to August 15-23.

The biennial event features national teams.

The 2021 badminton World Championships will move from its August slot and begin in late November to avoid a clash with the rescheduled Tokyo Olympics next year, the game’s governing body said on May 1.

The tournament will be held from November 29 to December 5 in the Spanish city of Huelva, the Badminton World Federation (BWF) said in a statement.

Sumo

The Summer Grand Sumo Tournament has been postponed by two weeks from its scheduled May 10 start due to concerns over the coronavirus, according to the Japan Sumo Association.

The annual 15-day tournament at Tokyo’s Ryogoku Kokugikan is one of the six major sumo contests held in Japan every year. The Tokyo tournament is now scheduled to start on May 24, with the next competition to be held in Aichi Prefecture also delayed for two weeks.

Paralympics

The postponed Paralympic Games will run from August 24-September 5, 2021.

Canoeing

All events originally scheduled for May, including the Paracanoe World Championships, canoe sprint Olympic qualifiers, and the ICF canoe sprint World Cup have been cancelled.

Pre-Olympic canoe slalom training camps in Tokyo in May, June and July have all been cancelled.

The opening two ICF canoe slalom World Cups, set for June in Italy and France, have been postponed.

Swimming

The short course world championships, scheduled for December in Abu Dhabi, will now be staged from December 13-18, 2021, in the United Arab Emirates. 

The 2021 aquatics world championships in Fukuoka, Japan, will now be held from May 13-29, 2022, swimming’s governing body FINA said in a statement on May 4.

Canada’s Tokyo Olympic and Paralympic swimming trials have been rescheduled for next April, Swimming Canada said.

The trials, originally set for March 30 to April 5 in Toronto, were postponed on March 13 as part of efforts to control the spread of the novel coronavirus. They were rescheduled after the International Olympic Committee and Japan organisers postponed the 2020 Summer Games for one year.

The meet will be held at the same venue, the Toronto Pan Am Sports centre, but will be condensed into a five-day program from the seven days originally planned.

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NOS Primavera Sound 2019

Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

It’s starting to be too common: no matter how warm and sunny it is in the week leading up to the festival, NOS Primavera Sound (NPS) is doomed to be ruined by at least one day of rain. The first day did not look promising after the announcement of the passage of depression Miguel (no, not the rnb star who performed there a couple of years ago) through the north of Portugal. Flights were cancelled, Ama Lou and Peggy Gou could not reach Porto in time to perform, strong winds and rain showers threatened to turn Parque da Cidade into a muddy mess, the gates were opened almost an hour later than it was scheduled. 

JARV IS.... Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

But then there was music. Under a temporarily clear sky, and in front of probably the smallest crowd ever in the 8pm slot at the main NOS stage, Built to Spill performed what was one of the longest shows in NPS history. In over an hour and a half, they have not only revisited Keep It Like a Secret in full, but have also played selections from their 25+ years long career, from the marvellous “I Would Hurt A Fly” off their 1997 masterpiece Perfect from Now On to Untethered Moon’s “Living Zoo”. At times, the stage looked too big for a quartet of introverts playing for other introverts, but their set was engaging enough for us to have to miss a few songs off Jarvis Cocker’s first solo show in the country in nine years. JARV IS… a six-piece band complete with guitars, a harp, sax, keys, and, of course, a rolling-all-over Jarvis, agile and charming as ever. A couple of new songs were the highlights among songs off Further Complications (“Homewrecker!”, “Further Complications.”). There was also time for a single incursion into Pulp material (“His ‘n’ Hers”) that left everyone nostalgic for one of the best Portuguese festival shows in recent history: Pulp’s takeover of the Paredes de Coura festival back in 2011. 

Allen Halloween. Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

At the green, lush Pull & Bear stage that once was sponsored and programmed by ATP, and after another surprise rain shower, local hip hop hero Allen Halloween was on. Although he has struggled to gather a big crowd as headliner Danny Brown prepared to take over the NOS stage, and his Portuguese lyrics clash into a language barrier that drove most foreign visitors somewhere else, his devotees seemed to be delighted after his short set (we know we were). In “greatest hits” mode, he and his two fellow Kriminal crew MCs dropped hit after hit, starting with the catchy “Drunfos”, a song off A Árvore Kriminal about prescription painkillers that miraculously solve back pain. The most recent album Híbrido got plenty of love throughout the show, too, as Allen strolled through “Bandido Velho”, “Youth”, and “Mr. Bullying”, the best revenge song of the 2010s. But the highlight of the show had to be set closer “Fly Nigga”, off 2006’s Projecto Mary Witch.

Stereolab. Rita Carmo / BLITZ

Back at the SEAT stage, a blast from the past as Stereolab performed for the first time in ten years. The long, jammy, jaw dropping “Metronomic Underground” was the highlight in the first half of the show that had to be cut short so we could witness the full extent of Tommy Cash’s odd world. The Estonian rapper/producer combines the funniest visuals of the whole festival with nonsensical lyrics in a seemingly faux-Eastern European heavy accent, but it’s when the Russian hardbass-influenced tracks drop that the Super Bock stage crowd properly erupts. But the greatest moment of the night was still to come, as Solange took the NOS stage by storm. Not in a bombastic way, as we know her sister would do, but through a meticulously prepared, aesthetically spotless show. The finesse of the performance, focused on her latest record When I Get Home, was only interrupted in the semi-ecstatic, early-career banger “Losing You”, before an epic, copious rain shower sent half of the audience home halfway through the encore. We wanted to see Yaeji later on, but perhaps she shouldn’t have ordered all that rain.

Courtney Barnett. Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

Friday started with yet another major headache for the organisers: a radar problem in the airport has led to major delays and flight cancellations, and Mura Masa’s show was also cancelled, but the rest of the festival ended up going on as planned. Major headache for us, then: a somewhat tedious Aldous Harding show didn’t let us see what was one of the highlights of the festival for everyone who saw them (Jambinai); on the other hand, the triumphant return of the Basque rock powerhouse Lisabö (two drummers, plenty of guitars, beautiful, beautiful noise) made up for our choice of dropping our favorite Nilüfer Yanya, who we have seen earlier in May. We haven’t seen Courtney Barnett ever since she released her latest record Tell Me How You Really Feel, and we feel like we made the right call on this one, even though that means snubbing another marvellous Sons of Kemet show. Unlike Built to Spill the day before in the same exact time slot and stage, the Australian singer-songwriter’s trio knew exactly how to fill up a big stage. And how can something go wrong if you start off with the addictive “Avant Gardener”, the song that made us quit the Slowdive reunion show ten minutes into the concert so we could see her perform for an half-empty Pitchfork tent back in 2014? With a setlist that drew equally from both her LPs, plus a couple of oldies (good to know “History Eraser” is still part of the show) and non-album tracks (“Small Talk” and the very recent RSD single “Everybody Here Hates You”), Courtney Barnett’s band is a well-oiled machine destined to make new fans in every single festival show this season.

J Balvin. Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

Speaking of well-oiled machines, do we really need to review Shellac’s show yet another year and tell you it was the best hour we spent in the festival? This time around we got a few funny lads in the pit, including one dressed like Mickey Mouse (the true MVPs), and Steve Albini dropping some Ed Sheeran diss lines during “The End of Radio”. Wash your bedsheets you pig. And then the little, sad, grey world of “underground” indie purists that can only dance to “Blue Monday” fell apart as reggaeton giant J Balvin took the stage; the word “Reggaeton” filling up the screen as he performs the song with the same name. It looked like a foreign power taking by force a territory that will be their colony for the next hour and a half, sticking a pole and hoisting their flag as high as they can. But, this time around, it’s not a bossy bunch of Europeans landing in a tropical island; it’s the “tropical island” folks biting back, as the sound of Latin barrios becomes, at least temporarily, the lingua franca at the NOS stage. The show itself could have used more tracks off the excellent Vibras, released last year, and both “Machika” and “Ambiente”, two standout tracks off that record, could have gotten the full treatment instead of being only partially played; some songs in which Balvin features are perfectly discardable. But the apotheotic finale with his biggest hit to date “Mi Gente”, featuring a colorful bunch of cartoons, both on stage and on screen, has to be the highlight of the day and possibly of the whole festival. Dios bendiga el reggaeton. 

JPEGMAFIA. Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

Elsewhere, Interpol has recovered from what was possibly the worst trainwreck we have witnessed in NOS Primavera Sound history (not sure if the 20 minutes long Neil Michael Hagerty show a couple years back was as terrible or the best thing we’ve ever seen, so there’s that) by performing a pretty solid show, anchored in what they know are the most vital records they’ve released: Turn On the Bright Lights and Antics, going fifteen and seventeen years back in time to bring us some of the most iconic guitar-driven of that decade (“C’mere”, “Take You On A Cruise”, “Leif Erikson”, “Obstacle 1″, “Roland”...). If you know when to avoid any recent tracks - although we have to say new single “Fine Mess” did not sound as bad as anything else they have released in the past decade - it’s a fine moment to see Interpol for old times sake, as Paul Banks apparently learned how to sing. With his sunglasses on at midnight, of course. Our night ended at the Pull & Bear stage with JPEGMAFIA wishing Morrissey was dead, rapping, jumping and crawling around the stage as a one-man-show should, and with a late night SOPHIE live act. If the more atmospheric, less interesting first half of the show threatened to send us all home with the feeling we could have went home earlier instead of freezing to death, the “Whole New World”/“Ponyboy”/“Faceshopping” combo was enough to bring us back to life. 

Shellac of North America. Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

Saturday was the most guitar-driven day of the bunch, and our decision to have lunch in a nearby restaurant paid off when we learned Shellac was playing an extra 4pm show at the entrance of the festival for a handful of lucky people, including Low’s Alan Sparhawk, who sat at the floor as happy as any of us. Hop Along had the tough task to open the big stage as a dozen of Rosalía fans were already lining up for her much later show on the same stage. The Saddle Creek-signed indie rock quartet spearheaded by songwriter Frances Quinlan is always great live, as we have recently seen as they opened for the Decemberists on a recent European tour, but we soon had to hop to the SEAT stage to check out post-punkers Viagra Boys. You wouldn’t tell from their looks (frontman Sebastian Murphy is up on stage half-naked, showing a full-tattooed torso) that this funny group of Swedes loves taking the piss of macho men (and, apparently, everything else), but that’s just what they do. 

Viagra Boys. Hugo Lima / NOS Primavera Sound

Coming up next was Big Thief, our favorite new band of the past couple of years. This meant we had to miss both Lucy Dacus and Tomberlin, who we would be obviously excited about, if only we had three sets of eyes and ears (and another couple of brains to process it all). We seem to get plenty of Masterpiece songs every time they perform in Portugal, and we’re not complaining. From “Paul” to “Real Love”, with the sad but hopeful “Parallels” thrown in the middle, there was plenty of songs off their debut to enjoy until the whole crew joins the band for one last performance of the title track to finish off the European leg of their tour. There was even time for guitar player Buck Meek - finally back with the band - to shine and play one of his solo songs, and for a couple of unreleased songs. Please release a studio version of “Not” ASAP, guys. Thanks. Still on the SEAT stage, Guided by Voices tried their best to stuff 36 songs in one and a half hours - and although we did not count them, someone else did. I cannot seem to memorize half of my passwords, and yet Robert Pollard can go through lyrics of three dozens of songs from eleven different albums (with a focus on the most recent albums - both released this year - Zeppelin Over China and Warp and Woof), including semi-hits “Game of Pricks”, the highly celebrated “Tractor Rape Chain”, and set closer “Glad Girls”. A lesson of what we now call “indie rock” for newcomers to learn from.

Kate Tempest. Luís Sousa / Música em DX

The 10pm slot of the festival was one of the busiest. We’re sad to know Tirzah was playing for less than a hundred of people at the Pull & Bear stage and decided to check out Rosalía, way closer in the NOS stage. It was the busiest we saw the main stage during this edition of the festival, and the Spanish singer seemed to have full control of the big stage as she, accompanied by half a dozen of dancers dressed in white, performed her duet with James Blake, “Barefoot in the Park”, a new flamenco-inspired song (“De Madrugá”), and “Catalina”, a highlight from her debut album Los Ángeles. Too bad we cannot be near Kate Tempest and not go see her, even though we were at one of her ‘trial’ shows for the upcoming new album tour less than a month ago, and we had to go back to the SEAT stage, where Tempest was already performing “Europe Is Lost”, one of the standout tracks off 2016′s Let Them Eat Chaos. She’s on stage with only her keyboard player and a very simple setting: some sort of circular canvas where her figure is sometimes projected as she delivers the heaviest, the most hopeless, but also the most hopeful lines you’d hear all festival. Especially on the second half of the show, as she focuses on her yet unreleased new album, The Book of Traps and Lessons, from which she draws tracks like the "singles” (if we can call it that) “Firesmoke” and “Holy Elixir”, plus “Hold Your Own”, one of the most beautiful moments of the whole weekend. We do not deserve Kate Tempest, one of the best artists of our generation.

Low.

Along with the fantastic Shellac/J Balvin sequence, the last three shows of the festival ended up being the best we’ve seen. There were legitimate concerns that Low’s music was too quiet and solemn to be played simultaneously with the likes of Modeselektor and Neneh Cherry in nearby stages, but although some of the sound from other stages made its way into the surroundings of the Super Bock stage as the Duluth band played their set, we wonder if people in the other stages were not equally affected by the whirlwind of sound Low has managed to produce during a breathtaking and extra loud “Do You Know How To Waltz?”, the majestic, noisy long track off 1996′s The Curtain Hits the Cast, complete with a maelstrom of strobes and visuals that were absent from the arguably quieter European 2018 fall tour. Although the setlist was more focused on their recent Double Negative, an album with a radically distinct production but that sounds exactly like classic Low when translated to a stage, there were a couple of trips to older records (“Lazy”, from debut I Could Live in Hope) and some of the most interesting tracks off their albums from the 2010s (Ones and Sixes’ “No Comprende” and C’mon’s “Especially Me”). If we knew the show would be as good as it was, we would have hugged Alan Sparhawk as much as he was hugging Bob Weston halfway through during that extra Shellac show.

Yves Tumor. Hugo Sousa Photography

But the real surprise of the night (and of the whole festival) came on our final show: as Erykah Badu was already more than half an hour late at the main stage, Yves Tumor took the opportunity to steal the show with one of the most energetic concerts of the festival. The androgynous performer, some kind of 22nd century glam-rock inspired Prince, completely dominated the stage from the moment he sets foot on stage and starts giving out signed tour posters (“nobody buys them anyway, just have them for free”). And off-stage too, as he was carried in the arms of an army of fans trying to avoiding being hit by his large heels. He performed only four (very celebrated) songs off his latest record, Safe in the Hands of Love, including the sing-along masterpiece “Lifetime”. Instead of being safe in the hands of his familiar old tracks, Tumor chose to focus on unreleased songs instead, completely suiting his band (guitar, bass, drums, and electronics) that sounds like has been playing together for ages. No video can truly capture what it was to be there, but here you go (Thanks Campainha Eléctrica for doing the Lord’s work).

NOS Primavera Sound

All in all, we left Parque da Cidade with the feeling we have witnessed what was, against all odds (weather included), the best NOS Primavera Sound edition of all time. It was the only time since we first visited the Barcelona festival, back in 2009, that we could not find half an hour to sit down, relax and have a long chat with our peers because there was nothing interesting going on (and, in that regard, we have to thank the recent decision to open all stages during the first day of the festival). Sure, some overlaps of artists that appeal to the same groups of fans (Allen Halloween vs Danny Brown, Big Thief vs Lucy Dacus vs Tomberlin, Hop Along vs Viagra Boys, Amyl and the Sniffers vs Guided by Voices, Tirzah vs Rosalía vs Kate Tempest) look like they could have been avoided. This could have attracted more people to the festival, especially those who feel the organisation have somehow “betrayed” them by focusing less on indie rock and guitar music on the festival’s prime time slots. That being said - all the bands we could not see could have easily filled another full day of the festival. And, at the same time, we feel the smaller amount of festival attendees has ultimately benefited and rewarded whoever still decided to go to the festival, as less people also means less queues, better views of the stages, a friendlier environment, less people chatting over the artists - we have never experience such a quiet festival in Portugal, with no one to argue with. Except those four girls who couldn’t turn the volume down during Kate Tempest’s quiet songs - you know who you are, and, well, your loss! Maybe we have hit the ideal spot, and entrances could and should be capped to 2019′s levels. See you at Porto’s Parque da Cidade in June 11-13 2020, where Pavement is scheduled to perform one of the only two shows of the second coming of their long awaited reunion. Tickets are available next June 17 for a short period of time, only for 2019 ticket holders, and from July 4 (for a period of 48 hours) for everyone else.

[hsrsports]

No set rules to call off US Open in case of COVID-19 outbreak - Click on link to subscribe my channel https://ift.tt/34vXvMA Facebook - https://ift.tt/2Vjiyz6 Twitter - https://twitter.com/HsrSports Pinterest - https://ift.tt/2ywdZIH Tumblr - https://ift.tt/2z5qwmL Blog - https://ift.tt/2VlBDRu #Sports #Sports_News #Tournament WASHINGTON: A player testing positive for COVID-19 will be dropped from the US Open, but the US Tennis Association has not established how many infected participants would force the Grand Slam tournament to be called off. According to a 10½-page 'Player QA Update' sent out this week by the USTA, “There are no guidelines available to determine what number (of positive tests) will compel” the cancellation of the US Open or the tournament that will precede it at Flushing Meadows this month amid the coronavirus pandemic. The Western Southern Open, usually held in Cincinnati, is slated for the hard courts at the Billie Jean King National Tennis Center from August 20-28, followed by the US Open from August 31 to September 13. No spectators will be allowed at either tournament. As the USTA is moved forward, players are announcing withdrawals because of the pandemic. No. 5 Elina Svitolina of Ukraine, a 2019 US Open semifinalist, and No. 7 Kiki Bertens of Netherlands wrote on social media on Friday that they won't be in New York. They join a growing list of absentees that already included the No. 1-ranked woman, Ash Barty; the defending men's champion, Rafael Nadal; and others such as Stanislas Wawrinka and Nick Kyrgios. Bertens cited concerns about needing to quarantine when returning to Europe for clay-court tournaments in Rome and Paris that are scheduled for after the US Open. Players have asked the USTA to provide a transit letter that would allow them to bypass a quarantine period when going from New York to Europe. USTA spokesman Chris Widmaier said Friday his group and its representatives are in touch with the WTA, ATP, the French tennis federation and government officials in Italy and France about the issue. “We are confident that working with this extended group, we will be able to get the assurances the players would like,” Widmaier wrote in an email. Among the coronavirus-related protocols explained in this week's USTA update for players: Players and guests — up to three per entrant in singles — must pass two coronavirus nasal swab tests 48 hours apart after arriving, although they're allowed to go to the tournament site if the first test comes back negative. “We anticipate results will be returned in 24 hours or less,” the USTA document says. Antibody tests are encouraged, but not required. Those who test positive for antibodies will take follow-up COVID-19 tests every seven days; those with negative results for antibodies — or who aren't checked — must take COVID-19 tests every four days for the rest of their time in the “bubble.” Players need written permission from tournament director Stacy Allaster or the chief medical officer to leave the “bubble” established for both events at Flushing Meadows -- otherwise, they'll be fined and kicked out of the competition. If coaches or guests exit the “bubble,” they'll lose their 2020 credential and not be allowed to get one next year. Aside from two official hotels for players and their guests, there will be private housing available for rent. Anyone staying there will undergo the same initial testing procedures and then will need further nasal swabs every four days, the USTA said, “unless the medical team determines otherwise.” Players staying at rental homes need to have — and pay for — 24-hour security, and the USTA “must be provided with access to the external security egress and ingress information for the duration of the time in the private housing.” AP Credit : Times of India Source: https://ift.tt/3iet4jM

[shah2323-madtitan]

Which sports have restarted and when will the rest follow?

Sport has taken one other step ahead from the coronavirus pandemic with the British and Irish Lions’ tour to South Africa subsequent summer time going forward as scheduled.

Right here, the PA information company takes a sport-by-sport have a look at how the calendar is shaping up.

Golf

This yr’s Ryder Cup, scheduled for Whistling Straits, Wisconsin, has been postponed till 2021 as a result of the extent of the coronavirus disaster in the United States.

The Open has been cancelled for the first time since 1945, however the US Open and the Masters are nonetheless scheduled to happen in September and November respectively.

The PGA Tour resumed in the US however a lot of gamers withdrew from its occasions citing well being issues, and preliminary plans to permit some spectators eventually week’s Memorial Match in Ohio had been scrapped.

The European Tour resumed final week with the Austrian Open, previous to a six-tournament ‘UK Swing’ behind closed doorways, beginning subsequent Wednesday with the British Masters and persevering with via to the UK Championship at the finish of August.

Soccer

Liverpool have already benefited from the Premier League restart on June 17 – now the race is on to finish the remaining matches and make clear the European and relegation locations, with Norwich’s return to the Sky Guess Championship already confirmed.

The second tier additionally returned on June 20 however Leagues One and Two ended their season early, like Scottish soccer. Wycombe beat Oxford at Wembley to assert a spot in the Championship, whereas Northampton defeated Exeter to make the step as much as League One.

The Champions League will be performed out as an eight-team match in Lisbon. The eight groups remaining in the competitors will participate in a straight knockout match between August 12 and 23, with the 4 remaining last-16 second leg matches – together with these involving Manchester Metropolis and Chelsea – happening on August 7 and eight.

This season’s Europa League from the final eight onward will happen throughout 4 venues in Germany between August 10 and 21. Manchester United, Wolves and Rangers will hope to be part of it, concluding their round-of-16 ties the earlier week.

Cricket

The Ageas Bowl is poised to host England in July (PA)

England’s delayed three-Take a look at sequence in opposition to the West Indies obtained underneath manner at Hampshire’s Ageas Bowl final week, amid strictly regulated and ‘bio-secure’ environments. Eire will play three ODIs in England between July 30 and August four, whereas Pakistan are already in the UK the place they’re isolating as a bunch forward of Assessments in August and September.

County cricket was given the go-ahead to begin on August 1 by the England and Wales Cricket Board and the 18 first-class counties are to debate the construction of the home season at a gathering early subsequent month.

Rugby union

The Gallagher Premiership is because of return in August. (Steven Paston/PA)

The Gallagher Premiership restarts the 2019-20 season on August 14. There have been no matches performed since March however golf equipment have resumed coaching.

When Premiership motion does return, the competitors will undertake the rule adjustments beneficial by World Rugby to decrease the danger of viral transmission.

The paused Six Nations is because of resume in October and conclude on the 31st, with the autumn internationals nonetheless slated for November.

Longer-term, it was introduced on Wednesday that the British and Irish Lions’ tour to South Africa subsequent summer time is to go forward as scheduled.

Rugby league

The Betfred Tremendous League will resume on August 2 (Zac Goodwin/PA)

Tremendous League will resume on August 2 with a triple-header of matches that includes Hull KR versus Toronto, St Helens going through Catalans Dragons and Huddersfield in opposition to Leeds.

It’s envisaged that, at the least initially, video games will be performed at a small variety of impartial grounds. Golf equipment have agreed to a diminished 22-round competitors with a Grand Ultimate in November.

Tennis

Home tennis has restarted forward of a scheduled international resumption (John Walton/PA)

Jamie Murray helped organise a six-day match referred to as ‘Schroders Battle of the Brits’ to fill the hole left by the suspension of each the ATP and WTA excursions.

The Garden Tennis Affiliation is at present working a ‘British Tour’ of 4 occasions till July 26, whereas the ATP and the WTA have revised their respective calendars and intend to renew subsequent month.

The US Open will go forward behind closed doorways at Flushing Meadows between August 31 and September 13 whereas the French Open has been pushed again per week and is now scheduled to happen from September 27 to October 11.

Nonetheless, a lot of prime gamers together with Rafael Nadal have indicated their reluctance to journey to the US, whereas the picture of the sport was hit by the Adria Tour exhibition tournaments in Serbia and Croatia final month, which resulted in a lot of gamers, together with world primary Novak Djokovic, testing optimistic for coronavirus.

System One

The System One season belatedly started with two Grands Prix in Spielberg. The motion strikes to Hungary this week, earlier than Silverstone hosts two races subsequent month. Races in Spain and Belgium comply with, earlier than the groups head to Italy for 2 races, then Sochi in September.

All races are anticipated to be staged behind closed doorways with a minimal variety of crew personnel at the circuit as a part of plans to create as secure an surroundings as doable for all these participating.

Biking

A revised schedule for the UCI World Tour takes place from August 1, with 25 occasions deliberate. The Tour de France will happen with an altered route beginning on August 29 and concluding on September 20, whereas the Giro d’Italia and Vuelta a Espana will overlap in October.

Snooker

The snooker season resumed with behind-closed-doors tournaments in Milton Keynes. The rearranged World Championships will begin – in all probability behind closed doorways – at the Crucible on July 31.

Which sports have restarted and when will the rest follow? Articles, follow, rest, restarted, Sports via exercisesfatburnig.blogspot.com https://ift.tt/3eA97BM

[cryptodictation]

The Laver Cup was suspended and will be played in 2021 | AND…

The Laver Cup, the exhibition tournament in which the best tennis players in Europe face off against the great exponents of the rest of the world, will not be played this year and will only return in 2021, as announced by the organization of the event that was scheduled for next September in Boston, United States.

“The Laver Cup Boston 2020 will take place from September 24 to 26, 2021,” the organization of the event reported on its official account on the social network Twitter.

The decision to cancel the 2020 edition was due to the fact that the worldwide recess due to the coronavirus pandemic logically reached tennis, and the cancellation of Wimbledon was added to the postponement of Roland Garros, which went from the last week of May to the last week of September, so that it would overlap with the Laver Cup, which he preferred to run.

“It is a shame to have to cancel the Laver Cup 2020, but it is the best decision we can make in such a situation,” said Swiss Roger Federer. after becoming official that the fourth edition of an event will not be played in which he is a great entertainer with the Spanish Rafael Nadal and the Serbian Novak Djokovic.

The Laver Cup is a tournament organized by the so-called “Team 8” promoted by Federer, and although it was included in the official ATP calendar in 2019, it does not distribute points for the circuit.

The tournament is named after notable former Australian tennis player Rod Laver, who excelled in the 1960s, and he is the only man to win all four Grand Slam titles in the same year twice: 1962 and 1969.

The first edition of the Laver Cup was played between September 22 and 24, 2017 at the O2 Arena in Prague; the second between September 21 and 23, 2018 at the United Center in Chicago; the third between September 20 and 22, 2019 at the Palexpo sports complex in Geneva, and this year it was to be played at the TG Garden in Boston, which will maintain its headquarters in 2021.

The post The Laver Cup was suspended and will be played in 2021 | AND… appeared first on Cryptodictation.

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[gabriellakirtonblog]

Five Basic Exercise Principles Every Good Personal Trainer Must Know

I’ve seen a lot of trainers come and go. Some looked like Marvel superheroes. Others had the charisma of a self-help guru. But almost all of them lacked legitimate scientific knowledge.

Many of them were objectively very good at training themselves. But someone who’s training another person should be able to answer basic questions about how the human body uses energy. Or why and how the body changes in response to exercise. Or how the stress a client encounters outside the gym can affect their performance in your training sessions.

It’s not just for you and your clients. A trainer without a basic understanding of anatomy, physiology, biomechanics, and the psychological underpinnings of his clients’ behavior diminishes the entire fitness industry.

If you didn’t learn these things in school, or when you got your personal training certifications, don’t feel bad about yourself. Lots of very good personal trainers don’t have degrees in exercise science, and some don’t have college degrees at all.

But just because you have a reason for not knowing these things doesn’t mean you have an excuse for not learning them.

Here are five key concepts every trainer needs to understand, and too many don’t.

READ ALSO: The Best Personal Training Certifications in the United States

1. Energy systems: What they are, and how to train them

2. Force vectors: Why they matter

3. SAID principle: The crucial link between actions and adaptations

4. Stress: How it affects your clients in and out of the gym

5. Psychology: What your clients don’t say can make or break your program

Final thoughts

1. Energy systems: What they are, and how to train them

Fitness pros talk a lot about energy systems. Unfortunately, most of it is either overstated or altogether wrong.

Every human has access to three distinct energy pathways. Which means every client, from the 80-year-old grandmother to the 16-year-old soccer player, is using all three systems during your workouts.

They work as a sliding spectrum, based on the immediate need to produce force and overcome a challenge. In one way, it’s like your body is shifting gears—lower gears and higher RPMs when it needs to quickly reach top speed, higher gears and lower RPMs to hit a sustainable pace.

But it’s not a perfect comparison. A car can only be in one gear at a time, while your body sometimes needs to use multiple energy systems simultaneously.

Aerobic system

Aerobic means “with oxygen,” which is why it’s also referred to as the oxidative energy system.

Because it’s your body’s default system, you use it all day, every day, whether you think about it or not. If you’re breathing, and not doing anything more strenuous than sleeping, sitting, or walking around, you’re using oxygen to tap into fat, your body’s near-boundless energy supply, along with carbohydrate.

How much of each you burn at any given moment depends on what you’re doing; what you ate and when you ate it; your overall health; your fitness level; and a bunch of other factors.

To train it, you generally need at least 20 minutes of exercise at a steady pace, although short bursts of higher-intensity exercise can also increase your VO2 max, the standard measure of aerobic fitness.

Phosphagen system (ATP-CP)

This is the first of your two anaerobic energy systems. It uses creatine phosphate (CP) to release adenosine triphosphate (ATP) for quick bursts of power or speed. Because your muscles store very little ATP and CP, these all-out efforts are limited to perhaps 10 seconds. After that, you have to slow down to allow your muscles to replenish their phosphagens.

You train this system the way you use it: with relatively short bouts of near-maximal effort. Remember that “maximal” is relative to your client’s strength and conditioning level. One client’s max is another’s warm-up.

Anaerobic glycolysis

Glycolysis is a fantastically complex process with a relatively simple outcome: use glucose for energy. It gets the glucose from your blood along with the glycogen stored in your muscles and liver.

We use anaerobic glycolysis for much of what we do in the gym—anything that takes more than 10 seconds and creates an oxygen deficit by the end. You also use it at the beginning of lower-intensity activities, before your breathing stabilizes and you can use your aerobic energy system, and at the end when you’re going into a finishing kick.

Theoretically, a trained athlete can use this system for as long as two minutes, but for your clients, it might be as little as 30 seconds before they’ll be gasping for breath and need to stop. As soon as their breathing returns to normal, they’ll return to using the aerobic system.

With a combination of strength and interval training, your clients’ improved conditioning will allow them to perform longer and more challenging sets and intervals, and to recover faster in between.

READ ALSO: Metabolic Conditioning: Don’t Say It Unless You Know What It Is

2. Force vectors: Why they matter

Movement always takes place against some form of resistance. You start with gravity, inertia, and the weight of your body, and then add whatever external load you want to move or manipulate. Whether that load is a pencil or a barbell, your muscles need to generate some amount of force to complete the task.

The strategy your body uses depends on the load and the force vector. For example, if you lift your arm out to your side, you don’t give it much thought. Your arm doesn’t weigh much, and it takes little effort to move it around. You can do it all day.

But if do the same thing with a weight in your hand, the strategy changes. From your feet to your neck, different muscles engage to stabilize your body while you lift the weight.

Make the weight heavier, and what does your body do? You don’t just contract the same muscles harder. You change the force vector by bending your elbow to shorten the axis of movement and shifting your torso to keep your body stabilized.

If the weight’s even heavier, you may not be able to lift it out to the side at all. But if you lie down on a bench, with your back fully supported, you could easily lift the same weight over your chest. You have the leverage provided by the bench and the mechanical advantage of lifting the weight directly over your center of gravity.

The type of resistance matters too. You can use cables, bands, and suspension trainers to not only change the force vector, but also to manipulate how the body interprets the movement. You can even add vectors by using two forms of resistance simultaneously—squatting with a band around the knees, for example.

READ ALSO: How to Change a Workout on the Fly in a Crowded Gym

3. SAID principle: The crucial link between actions and adaptations

Your body doesn’t change because you think it would be a lot cooler if it did. It changes when you consistently challenge it to get better at whatever you’re training it to do.

In other words, it makes specific adaptations to imposed demands, or SAID.

SAID can be negative and positive. If you spend long hours slumped on the couch in front of the TV, your body will adapt to sitting on your couch. Your posture will worsen, key muscles will shorten or lengthen, you’ll lose strength and mobility, contractile tissues will atrophy, and you’ll almost certainly decrease your cardiovascular output.

On the other hand, if you run several days a week, gradually and progressively increasing the speed and distance of your runs, your body will adapt to running. Your VO2 max and stroke volume will improve, you’ll increase capillary density, and your resting heart rate will decline. Your lower-body muscle fibers will remodel themselves to become more endurance-oriented, and your bones will thicken to make them more resilient to repetitive impact. You’ll also get better at running, with more efficient form that requires less effort on each stride.

A good personal trainer understands that every part of a client’s program should impose demands that lead to adaptations specific to the client’s goals. There should be a reason to do everything in the program, and a reason not to do something else.

READ ALSO: The Myth of Fat-Burning Workouts

4. Stress: How it affects your clients in and out of the gym

“Every stress leaves an indelible scar, and the organism pays for its survival after a stressful situation by becoming a little older.” — Hans Selye

Hans Selye was a mid-20th-century endocrinologist who coined the word “stress” as a way to describe the body’s reaction to the illnesses, injuries, and other things that grind it down. He called it the general adaptation syndrome (GAS) in a paper published in 1936.

Interestingly, he later regretted using the word “stress” instead of something more descriptive, like “strain.” This is how he tried to clear up the confusion he’d created: “Stress, in addition to being itself, was also the cause of itself, and the result of itself.”

Got that?

As Selye observed, stress comes in all forms, and can have a positive or negative impact. The modern world is filled with big and small stressors—your commute to work, the client who canceled, that argument you had with your spouse. All of them matter, creating a cumulative challenge to your health and well-being.

Exercise is also a type of stress. Most of the time it’s a positive experience, known as eustress, but with too much intensity or volume and too little recovery, it can become distress. The negative effects of exercise are compounded by problems at work or home, poor sleep, suboptimal nutrition (too much or too little or the wrong kinds of food), or excess alcohol or caffeine.

That’s why a client who has her lifestyle dialed in can push herself hard and still see improvements, while for another, even a modest training program can leave him exhausted and frustrated. The stressors in his life ensured that any workouts could leave him effectively overtrained.

The best coaches know to vary the intensities of each client’s workload to account for the stress the client carries into the gym. They can scale it down on days when a client is tired, tense, or unfocused. They can also scale up on days when the stars align, and it’s possible to chase progress.

You need to have enough empathy for your clients to identify when working out harder won’t help them achieve their goals. It’s possible that the biggest benefits will come from improving their sleep, eating more fruits and vegetables and less junk food, cutting back on stimulants and alcohol, or simply taking a short vacation to relax and recalibrate.

READ ALSO: The Big Rocks of Personal Training

5. Psychology: What your clients don’t say can make or break your program

If you want to master the “personal” part of personal training, you have to understand your clients. What motivates them? Can you read their emotional state well enough to see when they’re uncharacteristically driven or drained?

Let’s say you add something new to the program, and the client doesn’t like it. Some will tell you, but many won’t. (And those who speak up are often the ones who complain about everything.) Too many trainers will miss the client’s nonverbal signals and assume they just need a little more motivation. (“The fat won’t burn itself!”) Or, worse, they’ll read the negative body language as a character defect. (“Dig deep and suck it up!”)

Most clients will do what you tell them, however begrudgingly, but will also resent you for it.

Conversely, if you notice the client’s resistance, and ask what’s going on, you may discover the client has a good reason for not wanting to do it. An older client might feel intimidated by meatheads lifting (and then dropping) heavy weights nearby. A heavier client might not want to do a hip hinge that exposes her backside to scrutiny. A middle-aged guy might balk at doing an exercise that would expose his lack of strength or coordination.

Good trainers don’t just provide answers. They ask questions. They pay attention to what the client doesn’t say. And over time, they earn their clients’ trust. With trust comes respect, with respect comes loyalty, and with loyalty come good results for the client and financial security for the trainer.

It all starts with understanding how a client’s psychology can affect their workout, and how their workout can contribute to or take away from their overall happiness.

READ ALSO: How to Make Sure You Aren’t One of the Bad Trainers Ruining Our Profession

Final thoughts

The job of a personal trainer is straightforward: Help your clients achieve outstanding results without risking their health or safety.

But the process is infinitely complex. You owe it to yourself and your clients to understand the science that supports your program and the nutrition and lifestyle advice you offer. You need to understand the reasons for your client’s progress or lack thereof.

No trainer can ever know it all, but every trainer should at least know the basics. Without that knowledge, and a lifelong desire to build on it, you can never truly succeed as a fitness professional.

        Ready to Take Your Personal Training Career to the Next Level?

Starting your career isn’t complicated. All you need is for someone to pay you to train them.

But how do you get that first client? What do you need to know? Where do you want to work, and how do you get hired?

If your answer to any of those questions is “I don’t know,” you need The Wealthy Fit Pro’s Guide to Starting Your Career, the ultimate launching pad for ambitious personal trainers.

Jonathan Goodman will show you how to …

Land the perfect job for you (pg. 17)

Attract more clients (pg. 95)

Keep more clients (pg. 55)

Get even more clients through a foolproof referral system (pg. 115)

Learn the no-fail secret to motivating clients (pg. 61)

Set yourself apart with programs your clients will brag about (pg. 71)

Master marketing skills that open up new income opportunities (pg. 152)

Become the best trainer you can be (pg. 46)

If you’re just beginning your journey in the fitness industry (or know someone who is), you won’t find a more authoritative or comprehensive resource.

Order this book in paperback today and get the audiobook and ebook 100% free (a $40 value).

It all starts by clicking here: The Wealthy Fit Pro’s Guide to Starting Your Career

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[cryptodictation]

What if there is no more tennis this year? | Opinion

Recent events in the wake of the global coronavirus outbreak yield one single certainty: nothing is assured in the world of tennis. The cancellation of Wimbledon and the consequent suspension of the circuit until at least July 13 encourage the possibility, distant but latent, that there will be no more activity for the rest of the season.

You cannot abolish the entire year when April is just beginning. Power disputes and the difficulty of locating all tournaments in the second half of the season, however, could be two major factors. There is no way to rearm the calendar without either party being harmed.

The bomb that detonated Roland Garros days ago opened an amalgam of scenarios that do not solve the underlying problem. The French Federation exhibited its power, decided to postpone the tournament unilaterally and forced the rest of the governing entities to suspend the circuit until after the European dust season. With the new date, from September 20 to October 4, the French giant would be played a week after the US Open and would overlap with the Laver Cup, the creature powered by Roger Federer and his historic representative Tony Godsick. The weekend tournament-show even attracts several top performers for two key attributes: impact and money.

Like the United States Open, the exhibition communicated the intention of holding the same date – from September 25 to 27 in Boston -, so it is expected that the Swiss will not perform at Roland Garros. In the midst of a power struggle, the organization of the Rome Masters expressed the desire for a reprogramming. And the legendary Italian Adriano Panatta, champion in Paris in 1976, fired in favor: “Tennis institutions have a duty to protect the most traditional tournaments, even if it bothers Federer.”

Wimbledon's case is different. Once the chance to play behind closed doors was ruled out, the directors of the most prestigious tournament took a few weeks to announce the cancellation and communicated it in parallel with the extension of the suspension of the circuit by the ITF, ATP and WTA. And there was no controversy about it, although this time a wink came from Federer himself. “I am devastated, I cannot wait to return next year; now we value our sport more ”, highlighted the Swiss, who will play Wimbledon 2021 with almost 40 years.

Beyond the cancellation of the entire grass tour, the Mallorca tournament hopes to develop its first edition this season. “In the coming days we are going to analyze possible scenarios, including the option of postponing the event to another date in 2020,” said Edwin Weindorfer, promoter of the tournament whose director is none other than Toni Nadal.

The accumulation of interests that emerged from this pandemic does not offer simple resolutions. If the circuit continued as planned right now, the remaining two Grand Slams would be played in tight weeks, not to mention all the tournaments that will seek to be rescheduled and not suspended, such as the cases of Rome and Mallorca. So there doesn't seem to be a rational way to dispute what remains of the tour in just half a year, no matter how many weeks are added to the epilogue. If there is no solution, another version emerges, the same one that even some Argentine players in quarantine are considering: What if there is no more tennis this year?

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How the Argentine tennis players live the crown effect …

The commotion took over the world: the coronavirus advances exponentially and affects all items in every corner of the planet. Tennis, of course, is no exception. With no activity for the next few weeks, the uncertainty on the part of the players continues to grow. Suspended the circuit at all levels, both men and women, the protagonists go through moments of alert while working at home, some with mandatory quarantine and others voluntarily detained to protect themselves and strangers.

While the news flies in the midst of a pandemic, the players learn of the resolutions from the authorities and plan how they can day by day in their environment. The postponement of Roland Garros, For instance, it surprised everyone: scheduled for May, the second Grand Slam of the year will finally take place from September 20 to October 4, a week after the US Open final and in overlap with other events. By case, Juan Martín del Potro announced that he is in quarantine after arriving on Tuesday from Miami, where he spent two months recovering from the knee operation he underwent.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B92G1FlFsBe/

“It seems to me barbaric that Roland Garros has been postponed, especially to protect people. Although two months are missing, it is good that they have made that decision; you have to see what happens with the rest of the tournaments. But the main thing is health, then the rest comes ”, Horacio Zeballos, number four in the world in doubles, slipped in dialogue with Página / 12. Like most players, the player from Mar del Plata trains at his home in Buenos Aires and says he takes the necessary measures to take care of his family from the virus.

Federico Coria, who should appear 100 ° in the next update of the ranking, said that he works with home routines because quarantine does not allow him to attend the gym in the area where he lives. After returning from Indian Wells last week, the contest canceled on the hour, he remains uncertain about the measure that ATP will implement to resolve the ranking and the points: “I have no idea how they are going to solve everything, hopefully they can communicate it soon, but I am clear that it is impossible for all of us to leave happy ”.

“What happened with Roland Garros I suppose will happen with the other tournaments; The sooner it comes out the better we will be able to plan. Now it will be different, it will be very close to the US Open ”, analyzes Nadia Podoroska, leader of the Argentine squad in the WTA ranking (175th). The Pan American champion had returned from Bajío, Mexico, and had to go through the new coronavirus controls in Ezeiza: “Once I got off the plane, before going through migrations, there were some radars that took our temperature: we passed a meter away between each person and they measured us to know if we had a fever ”.

Already housed at her home in Rosario, and without the need to make a mandatory quarantine because she did not come from a risk area, the Peque chooses to protect herself: “I am only doing physical, I have a pair of dumbbells in my house to do strength and my physical trainer sends me the plans. My aunt also has a treadmill, so I can do the aerobic part. You have to have creativity. I take every precaution, not only for myself but also for the rest of the people. ”

Paula Ormaechea lives in Italy, the country in Europe that suffered the most from the expansion of the coronavirus. Based in Perugia, capital of the Umbria region, she is far from the most difficult area but her life has already changed, like that of all tennis players: “I am training as much as I can at home. I'm going to run to the park in front, which can still be done. I have two isoinercial teams in my house, I do exercises with bandages, I take the ladder to the park, I try to move and stay active. What they ask is that there be no groups of people, although nobody goes out too much anymore ”.

Married to Luciano De Cecco, owner of Sir Safety Perugia and the Argentine volleyball team, the number two in the country (260th) considers that the stop will go long and she found some hobbies: “With Luciano we spend the day, we watch TV, we read, we put together puzzles, we cook a little. On that side I enjoy it because we never spend a lot of time at home. I bought a keyboard to learn how to play the piano, something I had wanted to do for years and had never been able to. Today I have time and for now I am learning online, until this improves and I can take classes ”.

A native of Berazategui, Juan Pablo Paz is a tennis worker who lives in Italy and is also “locked up” by the coronavirus outbreak. “I had come to Milan to visit my girlfriend and suddenly many cases began to appear. We ran away and went back to San Remo, where I live and train. From there I went to Croatia but everything got worse: He was going to play a tournament that was suspended on a Thursday and two days later the country was closed. I didn't know where to shoot ”, counted the former 284th in the ranking.

For the moment he will be inactive for two weeks in Milan: “All I can do is train at home, a little physical in the garden. Playing tennis is impossible, all clubs are closed. Then I will have to see how to get back to San Remo, if you can train. But I am with the twine to the limit: I cannot travel to Argentina, if I spend everything in one passage I am baked. ”

The Cordovan Pedro Cachin (396 °, ex 166 °) is in a similar situation. Installed in Barcelona for several years, today it lives within four walls: “You can only leave here for basic needs. All tennis players are doing physical at home, because tennis cannot be played. We have to wait. The issue is complicated: the sooner we are strict, the faster we will overcome it. Hopefully in Argentina they do it as soon as possible because it can get out of hand. Here, for example, if they catch you on the street they can put you a minimum fine of 800 euros ”.

https://twitter.com/pecachin1/status/1239319782245183490

For Facundo Bagnis, a member of the Argentine Davis Cup team and former 55th in the world, the most important thing is health: “I don't even think about how it affected me. It was very important to stop, you have to be careful. The measure that ATP took is fine. It would also be logical if they need even more time to suspend the circuit ”.

The world is paralyzed; the yellow ball, too. The countries are closing before the international outbreak and it seems that the tennis planet will be slow for a long time. Even from the United States it is said that the circuit would remain braked for three months, no less. The players, meanwhile, work at home and look to an uncertain future.

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