#respectable promiscuity

[trash-can-sam]

What happens when your coworker kills your other coworker but both of you are in a relationship (kind of) with the same ethereal woman who had an admiration for said dead coworker.

+bonus Evandrey because it’s funny to me (I’m sorry Eva.)

[powerin]

when i said noir is the “woman understanderer” i was only half-joking

i love that he doesn’t act entitled to felicia’s sexual history or demand information about her private life. he doesn’t shame her for having multiple partners. instead noir gets her character to develop in a respectful, subtle way

“okay mb foxy mama. didn’t mean to pry. anyway here’s a photo of the dude osborn killed, he still loved you”

[roboraindrop]

Being an asexual with two Hypersexual f/os who are on opposite sides of the morality spectrum is hard djdhdks

I just called eye bags sexy and the word sexy alone was enough to summon Dan to come in Hot and Flirty, then Fonzie had to come drag him away so I could get some work done 😅

[nezuscribe]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭

pairing: gojo x fem!reader

summary: gojo satoru was the most notorious man across the land. he was the strongest soldier the north had ever produced, the most brilliant of minds, and somebody who slept his way through the noble ranks. his parents set him up in a marriage agreement with you, hoping that a tie with a ring would help save his image. you know gojo never wanted this, and you try to act as if that was normal. but soon, without you or even him realizing it, he comes to the conclusion that while he never wanted this marriage - he's beginning to want you.

warnings: 18+ mdni: arranged marriage, angst, slight no comfort, gojo is emotionally constipated for a bit, heavy making out, eating out (fem! receiving), fingering, (naoya)

word count: 19.7k (sorry)

note: inspired by this drabble. i'm so happy this behemoth of a fic is done!! art credit: _3aem

jjk masterlist + series masterlist

Gojo Satoru was the most powerful man alive. 

Not only physically, though some people chalked him up to being half god, but his name held even more control. The Gojo family of the North was as old as the gods themselves, and they’ve been making sure it’s been kept that way. They owned so much land that you would walk to the ends of the earth and circle back around and it would probably still be theirs. They had armies of unfathomable sizes under their command, so much riches that they could probably buy an entire nation and still have plenty to spend. 

His presence was just as large as his name created him to be. Any ball he went to, all eyes would fall on him. On the battlefield, men feared to see the flash of white hair, knowing that his strength was unbridled. 

And his physical beauty? Most people assumed he was blessed by the gods himself. Gojo had a certain look that just made your knees weak, your heart palpitate, and your cheeks heated up. The handful of times you’ve seen him from afar you’ve been able to understand why all the girls (and some of the guys) yearned for his attention. His eyes were a piercing blue as if somebody had held a mirror to the sky when creating them. His hair had grown whiter with the years, as white as the snow that sunk deep into the grounds of the north. Gojo had the build of a soldier, and he towered over most people. His bulky build was intimidating, but you heard some girls whisper behind their hands about how he must look underneath all those ceremonial garments. 

The lord of the North was power itself. 

Which would make you, by martial association, the North's most powerful lady.

And for somebody who grew up with the same respect as a stable boy, it was all too much too soon. 

And yes, while on paper you still had your father's last name and legacy tied to it, you weren’t really a daughter to your parents. Your mother, though you had to call her by her name whenever you weren’t in public, seeing how she wasn’t really your mother, made sure it was kept that way. Your other three half-sisters should have been in your spot, either one of them more true to the family name than you. But seeing how they’re already married, you were the final resort. 

Gojo Satoru, though you’ve seen him countless times (something common because of how close in ranks your families were), had only acknowledged you a couple of times. You didn’t care much, never did, because that's what you were used to. After all, it was a common fact that you were what they nicknamed “the bastard daughter” of the West.

But it didn’t seem to matter much to his parents, as they offered their son up to you in a marriage arrangement. 

And who were you to turn that down? 

They, his parents, assured you that their son was looking forward to this union. He was the one to offer it, they said, which you were skeptical of but weren’t stupid enough to question. You knew how much Gojo Satoru was tarnishing their reputation with his promiscuous ways, but as long as he was okay with this arrangement you couldn’t find any part of you that would disagree with it. 

After all, you knew that this marriage wasn’t out of love, fascination, or even a mutual understanding, but because of the strength your own family (more so your father) held, and how you were the only feasible option for a bride. 

So, after weeks of rocking back and forth on agreements, paperwork, dress rehearsals, and grueling dancing lessons (and still no sight of the man himself), you found yourself standing at the end of the aisle, your arm linked around your fathers as a large smile plasters itself on your face. 

Ever since you were young you had convinced yourself that the only man who would want to taint his name enough to marry you would have to be either a troll or an ogre, so that fact that your future spouse was human was better than anything you could have asked for. 

And you’re not daft. As your heart hammered loudly against the limited space of your chest, waiting for your cue to start walking, you reminded yourself that this was just a mutual agreement. It’s hard for people at your level to marry for love, but even then, you can’t help but hope that you can make a decent friendship out of this. 

You glanced at your father next to you, catching his eyes as he nodded once, staring ahead of him into the small crowd of just your two families, and patted your arm. 

You still remember the music playing, the instruments harmonizing together as you took a tentative step forward, feeling warm under the eyes of people you didn’t know, but you kept reminding yourself that this was the best thing that could’ve happened to you. Either you died as an old maid in the little room you had near the kitchens at your old home or got married to some warlord who wanted an entire village as family. 

The orchids that surrounded the venue still infiltrate your nose as you think about it, the way the silk of your dress felt against your skin that had been scrubbed raw earlier that morning. 

And there you saw him, standing at the end of the aisle. At that moment you realized how much of a mistake this was,

Because the man that stood there, the man who you were about to marry, seemed like he’d rather be dead than be your husband. 

—

You blink out of your trance, sitting up straighter in your seat as you mindlessly stop tearing up pieces of your bread, rubbing your fingers together to get rid of the remnants of flour. 

The dining hall was huge, far bigger than the one back home. Though you rarely ate there, you could still remember it, and it definitely wasn’t as big as this. Yet, despite its size, you felt like you were a little grain of rice in its vastness. 

The Gojo estate itself was humongous. His parents resided in a smaller house near the ocean now that you’ve moved in, but you would bet that the word humble they used to describe it was anything but humbling. You’ve been here for weeks and yet you feel like you’ve only discovered half of what this place has to offer.

There were guards at every corner, but at this point, you’re convinced they're just for decoration. If your husband is as decorated a warrior as they say he is, he could protect this entire estate with no help necessary. 

You stare at your plate, at the array of food prepared just for you, different sorts of cured meats, loaves of bread, cheeses, fruits, and juices from all over, and still, you feel no hunger. 

Months ago you’d be ecstatic to see how much your life has changed. You get new clothes that fit you, food whenever you desire, people at your beck and call. Your room is no longer that cramped space you’d been given to hide you away from the rest of your family, but twice the size of your father's old bedroom. You wake up earlier and sleep later, do whatever you want, but none of it feels deserved.

The only thing you can bring yourself to think about is how the last time you saw your husband was the night of the wedding. The look on his face when you made your empty vows to one another, his faint lingering kiss on your cheek. You can blink your eyes and still see the way he left, his jaw clenched as he ignored the calls from his parents. How, even here, rumors seemed to follow you. 

Safe to say, you spent your meals alone. 

Not only that, but your rooms were entirely separate as well. You were told that you had to consummate the night of your marriage, but from what you’ve heard, your husband sleeps in an entirely different wing of the estate, with walls and corridors between the two of you. 

You tried taking your mind off of things, pretending as if this was normal. 

Most days you’d walk around, trying to familiarize yourself with the layout of the grounds. You’d walk the gardens a couple times each week, try to memorize the way back to different places, and stay in the library the other half of the time. 

A part of you was happy to at least be away from that miserable home, but it felt like swapping one prison for a slightly better one. Your maids were kind, of course, but you didn’t know anybody here. They treat you like a lady of noble ranking, as expected from being the wife of the Lord in the North, but you’d rather be given an apron and start working around instead of this mind-numbing boredom of just sitting around. 

You stare at your plate, chewing on a grape slowly. 

Looking up you see the sun filtering in through the large windows, illuminating the long table that sits like an empty grave. Clicking your tongue you pick up another grape, slumping in your seat as you look up. 

This is just the way things will be.

—

“Alina?”

You call out from your vanity, staring at your maid as she’s picking out different earrings for you to pick from for dinner. 

It’s a couple of days later, and still no word from Gojo. But that doesn’t mean that you haven’t stopped for a single second to not think about your supposed husband. 

You try not to care, pretend that you’re lucky that he’s not bothering you or going out of his way to remind you of this unfortunate situation, but above anything you just feel alone. 

The maid looks up, a curl falling from her tight bun as she smiles at you in the mirror. 

“Yes, my lady?” She stands up straighter, flattening out the wrinkles from her apron tied around her waist as she begins walking towards you with the jewelry. 

“Is this…is this normal?” You crane your neck around to look at the different pairs she’s holding up, nudging your head to the red ones that shine bright, and watch as she sets them down on your desk, resting her hand on your hip as she stares at you quizzically. 

“What do you mean?” She asks as you begin taking your earrings off, putting the new ones on yourself. In the beginning, she protested, saying that a woman of your caliber shouldn’t have to do such measly tasks. But the more you protested, she eventually gave up. 

“Do husbands and wives usually sleep separately?” you say, feeling your chest contract in embarrassment at the stupidness of your question. 

You watch as she swallows thickly, avoiding eye contact as she sets on fixing some parts of your hair. 

Staring patiently through the vanity mirror as you watch her work, Alina wets her lips, her eyes downcast as if not wanting to answer. 

“Was there somebody else he preferred to marry?” You decide to ask, twisting that knife that you knew was lodged in her side, one that was stopping her from talking, and watch as her eyes widen slightly in shock. 

“If you don’t answer I’m just going to keep asking more uncomfortable questions,” you warn and Alina snorts softly, shoving your shoulder a little bit as you crack a smile. 

She moves around, picking up a necklace, and begins clasping it behind your neck. 

“I…I don’t know. He’s always been pretty secretive and,” she looks at you briefly, “Selective. I don’t mean to speak ill of my lord but it would be stupid not to acknowledge his old ways. But we never heard of a specific girl.”

Alina places a gentle hand on your shoulder, a sad smile on her face. 

“You’re lucky my lady,” she says, her voice hushed, “Most wives don’t have the freedom to say their husbands don’t care what they do. Had you married that Zenin, you’d be pregnant by now.”

You shudder out a breath, nodding once more. 

“I’ll see you after dinner, my lady,” she says, moving out of the way as you stare quietly at the floor before leaving silently. 

—-

Tonight for dinner the cooks made you a wide array of different dishes, all from the Northern shore. There are different types of fish, each cooked in various ways. It looks delectable, a feast fit for a king. 

You feel awful, though, seeing that you can’t eat any of it. 

The last time you had fish your face swelled up and couldn’t breathe properly, so that family physician told you to steer away from it. But you’re here now, and it somehow slipped your mind to ever mention this little fact to them, so you’re awkwardly poking around some of the vegetables under the fish, looking for something to eat. 

You pile some potatoes and carrots on your plate, scraping off any bits of fish on them as you hold this wasn’t your last meal. 

The only sound that fills the room is your fork and knife sometimes hitting the porcelain plate, and you look up every now and then as you chew, looking at the paintings on the wall. 

You’re so focused on a portrait of an old man that you don’t even notice the figure standing at the entrance of the dining hall, not until you hear a muted curse. 

You look up instantly, your fork and knife dropping to the plate as you stare at the man in front of you, eyes wide at the sight of your husband. 

He stands there, blinking slowly as you stare back. 

You could swear time has never moved so slowly before. 

You can hear him mutter a quiet shit under his breath, not knowing if he should make this worse by turning around and leaving or if he should join you. 

He’s wearing a simple tunic, his face a little flushed, hairline beaded with sweat. Did he just come out of training? He must often do that, you decide, seeing how he must’ve felt comfortable enough walking in here without any clothing of import. 

His eyes seem to track your little movements; the way your chest rises and falls in a slow movement, the way your fingers have frozen in mid-air, lips slightly parting. Your eyes dart around the room, everybody seeming to have tensed up.

You open your mouth to say something, anything, but you’ve never been so moved to silence. It seemed as if years of learned vocabulary slipped your mind within an instant, and no matter how hard you tried, nothing was coming back.

Gojo looks behind his shoulder, at the large double doors he entered through, deep in thought. This would be the first time the two of you had seen each other in weeks, and his tirade of avoiding you has come to an end. It looks like an entire battle is being fought in his mind, and you don’t know what to do.

Suddenly, you watch as he shakes his head, deciding to give in and join you for dinner. 

The seconds go by like hours as he walks up to the seat at the other end of the table, staring at his seat for a brief second before he pushes it out and sits there. 

You don’t know what to do. 

Servants and maids quickly swarm the room, setting up his plate, cutlery, food, and drinks. It was all so hectic and rushed, but you were glad that it offered some sort of noise in the drowning silence.

A part of you wants to say something about the fish but you know this isn’t the right time. 

In the flurry of movements you allow yourself to discretely look at him a little better, seeing how the last time you saw him was so brief and hurried. 

The man radiates a different sort of aura you’ve never experienced before. While your father was one of the most powerful men in the West, Gojo was the strongest throughout the majority of the North and East. His frame took up the entire chair, his muscular shoulders and arms visible even through the loose fabric that was draped over him. You feel a little disappointed, knowing that if you were a different girl you’d probably be able to enjoy all of this. 

You try to make yourself seem indifferent, moving some of the vegetables in your plate around, but secretly just trying to shovel them down as fast as humanly possible to get out of this thick atmosphere. 

One of the men who was setting up some of the plates in front of Gojo takes notice of this, a smile overtaking his face as you briefly look up from your plate, startled to see the man walking closer to you.

“My lady, I’m so happy to see you enjoying our Northern delicacy!” He claps his hands together as you stare at him with wide eyes, your mouth still full of potatoes as you try chewing faster to get it all down before he gets closer to you. 

His eyes wrinkle around the edges, his graying mustache trimmed ever so carefully, and you can tell he’s trying to loosen up the tension, but you stare in abject horror as he stands at your foot of the table. 

“Would you like some more?” He motions to the fish that lay untouched in front of you, and you glance over to Gojo, hoping that maybe he is focused on his meal, only for your heart to sink at the fact that he is staring at you. 

“...y-yes,” you croak out, wiping some of the carrot remnants from the corners of your lips as you give him a wobbly smile, “It’s alright, I can serve myself,” you exclaim, trying to thwart him off as he quickly waves this aside, shaking his head as he grabs the tray, beginning to portion some hefty pieces of fish onto your plate.

You don’t have the heart to tell this jolly man that this amount of fish would kill you within an instant, or even that he was wasting this all on you, so you just sit there, giving him a tight-lipped smile as you try not to breathe it in too much. 

“Is that enough, my lady?” He asks, setting the tray down as you look at your plate now full of different sorts of sea creatures you swallow slowly, looking back up at him as you give a wobbly smile. 

“This is great,” you muster up and watch as an even larger smile takes over his face, and you feel awful for it, “Thank you so much,” you tell him, watching as he bows lowly, excusing himself as he, and the other servants, leave the room,

Leaving you and Gojo alone. 

You’re grateful that he’s already dug into his meal, not looking at a struggling you that’s moving the fish around with your fork as you try to find the last bits of vegetables you had saved up for yourself. 

The smell itself is enough to make your stomach turn, and you wince, reaching for your cup of wine to wash some of the nausea down.

“You have very good wine,” you say suddenly, against your will, and have an out-of-body experience as you realize what you just did. 

Gojo looks up from his plate, a little startled as he looks at you and the goblet in your hand, his white brows furrowed. 

He nods once, not saying anything, and you feel the strange need to continue, somehow enjoying the feeling of stabbing yourself in the foot.

“Our wine back home tasted like cow piss,” your eyes widened at your slip of crass language, “Er - not piss, um, urine…?” You wince even more, feeling as if a ghost with awful intentions had taken control over your body, “Not that I’ve had cow piss - urine!” You correct yourself, “But I imagine that if I had…that, um, it would taste like o-our wine back home...”

He’s staring at you, unblinking, and you smile awkwardly, raising the cup to him as a sort of cheers gesture. 

You count twenty seconds of silence in your head as you set the cup down, playing with your fork as you glance back up at him. Gojo looks as if he is regretting his decision to stay, his fingers tapping on his knife in a hurried sort of way. 

“I don’t really like wine,” you continue, feeling like the only thing that could stop you now was if somebody were to bludgeon you to death, “I like juice more. Oh, well, but I guess…wine is juice…?” you mutter to yourself, contradicting your own words mid-sentence, “Back home we had this mulberry juice and it tasted nice. Kind of like your wine,” he’s not even looking at you and so your words die, quieting down as you sink back into your seat, hoping it could eat you entirely. 

“Do you like wine?” You ask, tilting your head to the side, smiling faintly, awkwardly, “Or juice? Or… mulberries…?” 

He shakes his head, still not staring at you. 

“Did you have a good-”

“I prefer eating in silence.” Gojo finally said, raising his head slightly as he stared directly at you, watching as your mouth clamped shut. 

Your smile grows small, eyes falling to the table to hide the embarrassment in them. You give him a brief nod, mumbling a quiet apology under your breath as you begin moving some pieces of carrot around on your plate. 

You can hear the clinking of his utensils against his plate, wishing you could somehow fit an entire fish down your esophagus to escape this moment. 

You give it a couple of seconds, counting the groves in the wood of the table, and rise, stomach empty, heart churning as you finally excuse yourself. 

It only takes you minutes to find your room, quicker than last night, and allow yourself to sink against your bed, rubbing your skin raw of the rouge Alina had applied an hour earlier. 

—-

You don’t tell anybody of the awful encounter with the man that’s legally your husband, but you’re sure that those there to observe have already begun talking about it. You try to pretend nothing happened, but Alina could pick up on your closed-off demeanor that night, her hands gentler than usual when helping you take off your garments, her eyes filled with concern. 

“How was dinner, my lady?” She asked, staring at you as you waved off her worries, mustering up a lame excuse of a smile as you took off your silk shrug, avoiding any sort of eye contact as you slipped into your nightly garments. 

“It was good,” your words are void of emotion, “I had fish.” 

The following days are empty of any sight of your husband, but you’ve grown to find that normal. It doesn’t help that you can’t stop thinking about how idiotic you acted, your big mouth never knowing when to stop, tossing and turning in your bed at your excuse of an interaction. 

You continue with your old routine of walking around the estate, sometimes trying to track down Alina and your other maids, seeing if maybe they had some free time to spend with you. You know there’s a town nearby, the girls often talk about how they go there sometimes at night, but you’re too afraid of going out alone, not used to that sort of thing. 

Sometimes you sit out near the fields with a book, twisting the ring that’s searing into your finger, mindlessly taking in the words on the page. Other days you walk around the gardens, picking out some flowers for the vase in your room. On the days when you’re feeling really adventurous, you’d go near the east wing, where you’ve heard Gojo’s room is, and look at what sort of things lie there. But most times you chicken out, going back near your side just as quickly as you went.

You never see him at dinner again, knowing he wasn’t about to put himself through that torture again, so you go back to eating in silence, sometimes pretending that the chairs were full of people and that you were in one of those balls you longed to go to as a kid.

They seem to keep bringing fish out for you, and it’s in so many days deep that you’re in this sort of limbo where you can’t tell them you’re deathly allergic to it without feeling awful for all the work they’ve put in just to realize it’s gone to waste, so those nights, tonight, for example, you try finding as many vegetables as you can. 

The roasted asparagus and beets are lovely, but there was only so much of it. And you find yourself getting a little bit sick of it too, your stomach-churning as you try to chug as much water as you can to get rid of the dirt after-taste that the beets have.

You thank the cooks and the servants as you leave for the night, your stomach still relatively empty as you get to your room, telling Alina to leave early for the night as you get ready for bed by yourself, wanting to be with yourself just for a little bit. 

You lay on your bed, staring emptily at the ceiling, one hand on your stomach as if gurgling, still hungry for more. You try to sleep, trying to pretend like you were at your old home, those nights when this would be normal, but it’s no use. You’ve been too spoiled at the Gojo estate, and no matter how much you try to ignore the pang of hunger, it continues to bite you back. 

So you find yourself twisting off of the warm comfort of your bed, sitting in silence as you contemplate what you’re about to do, but give in, lighting a candle as you slide into some slippers, leaving your room as you try to find your way down to the kitchens. 

Thankfully, it’s well into the night when everybody is asleep, so this embarrassing walk of shame is only seen by the guards on duty. You walk down the testing staircase, careful to look around the corners for anybody there, but you’re alone. 

You make your way to the kitchens, not hard to find seeing that they’re near the dining hall, and you peep your head inside, a sigh of relief escaping your lips to find that it’s completely deserted. 

At your old home, your room was behind the kitchens. You grew up in a small room, nearly the size of a broom cupboard, but you made do with what you had. One benefit of this situation was that you were raised by the smell of different sorts of food, by people who specialized in the art of cooking. You knew how to make meals that nobody else in your family could even imagine, which you’re grateful for right now as you fumble around the kitchen, trying to find where they put different ingredients. 

You rummage through the cupboards, finding some eggs, bread, cheeses, and seasonings. You’re able to find the pots and pans a few feet away and start assembling everything for a little omelet.  

In your hurry of trying to be quiet and careful, you somehow manage to miss the large shadow figure that’s standing near the doorway, observing you. 

You crack the eggs into a bowl, beating them together with a fork you found, too tired to look for an actual whisk, turning around to throw the eggshells away when a cry of surprise escapes your lips. 

“Oh!” Your heart nearly falls right out of your ribcage, your hands flying to your chest as you find yourself staring at him, cheeks heating the way they seem to do whenever you’re looking at your husband. 

His blue eyes are tracking you, watching what you do, brows furrowed slightly as the two of you can’t do anything but stare at each other. 

“I…” You can’t find anything to say, looking at him and then behind your shoulder, to the things you have found, and swallow thickly, wetting your lips as you straighten your back up, suddenly aware of just how flimsy and bedroom-worthy your outfit is.

You can only stare at the ways his arms are crossed over his chest, biceps bulging, and lips pressed into a thin line. It seems like he wasn’t planning on seeing you here, yet another moment in which he’s probably going to regret somehow finding you in such a large estate.

“I’m making an omelet,” you finally say, your words falling like a whisper from your lips as you point to the eggshells now discarded in the trash, “I tried to be quiet…” you shake your head, eyes dropping from his heavy gaze for a second as you glance back up at him, lips upturned in an apologetic smile, “...sorry.” 

Gojo doesn’t say much, you’ve noticed that, but now you’re wondering if he has some sort of impediment that stops him from speaking to specific people. 

His chest rises briefly as he inhales, his white hair a little tussled as if he were sleeping. It doesn’t make sense why he’d be awoken, though. The kitchens are a far walk from the east wing…?

“I wasn’t asleep,” he finally says as if reading your mind, his voice deep as you feel it rattle your bones.

You nod once, not knowing what to do with the information. 

“Well…um,” you fidget with your fingers, “good, that’s good.” You nod once, as if that was all you were going to say, and look at the slight wrinkles in his clothes, crossing your arms over your chest, feeling naked with the way you’re not wearing any undergarments under your little nightly dress. 

“I’ll call for a cook,” Gojo murmurs, looking you up and down one final time as he turns to leave, seemingly done with this conversation. 

You sputter, shaking your head as you watch him turn to look at you through a confused stare. 

“No! Sorry…no, no need,” you say quickly, taking one step forward as if to stop him, “Please, it’s alright. I can cook myself,” you motion once more to your eggs and little station, noting the way he’s looking at you strangely, and so you feel the need to continue talking, perhaps one of your worst flaws.

Gojo looks at you finally, his fingers tapping on his arm. 

You notice that he’s not wearing his wedding ring, your chest filling with a strange feeling as you try to hide your ring-clad finger. “Do you not like their cooking?” He asks, and it takes a second for you to blink out of your stupor, a weird sensation in your throat as you shake your head slowly, trying to pull your eyes away from his hand. 

“I do,” you assure him, the words falling thickly from your lips, a lump in your chest, “I just feel bad waking them up right now,” you shrug as if you weren’t feeling any of these strange emotions, “And as I said, I can cook…so…” 

He nods, seemingly not believing you, not picking up on the storm that happening inside your head at the fact that he’s not wearing his wedding ring. You have to remind yourself that this isn’t an actual marriage, the ring was only for show. 

“Did you not eat dinner?” He continues, pressing, and your eyes widen slightly. 

You’ve always been terrible at lying, never able to do so. Even when your father's wife continued to drill you on who ate the candies from a party when you were younger, showing her your chocolate-stained fingers that you had hidden behind your back, not even a minute into the interrogation. 

“I did,” you say slowly, rubbing up and down your arms to warm them up from the chill breeze that seems to have picked up from the open windows, “The beets and asparagus were very nice,” you agree, not knowing what else to say without blowing this weird secret you’ve been holding onto. 

His brow raised slightly, lips pursing slightly. 

“And the fish?” 

You swallow once again, fidgeting with the fabric of your slip, your hands, your ring, and you don’t notice the way his eyes fall to the gold on your finger, darting back to your face when he notices you staring at him. 

“I…” you feel your face heating up beyond human measures, laughing awkwardly as you tug at your necklace chain, wishing that you hadn’t made that stupid decision to leave your comfortable bed, should’ve listened to your gut instead of your stomach, cursing your past self for being so rash, “I, um, I can’t…eat…fish.” 

Gojo’s stoic face, so sure and confident, seems to falter for a brief second.

His arms tighten over his chest. 

“...what?” He eventually asks after a couple of seconds of mind-bending silence, his head tipping in utter confusion as you sway from side to side on your feet, chewing your lips raw as you wish the ground could open up and never spit you back out. 

“The fish always looks great, don’t get me wrong,” you say quickly as if that’s going to do anything, “But I can’t eat fish. Otherwise I’ll swell right up and um, die…probably,” you wince at how bad you are at talking to people, your husband especially.

He lets out a little puff of air that sounds like a shocked scoff, eyes falling to the floor as he shakes his head, not understanding what you are saying. 

“But they’ve been cooking fish almost…four times a week?” 

You nod, smiling awkwardly, looking at the painting of a fish on the wall as you look back at him. 

“They have,” you affirm, leaning against a counter as he stays frozen in his spot at the door. 

“And you…you can’t have fish?” Gojo questions incredulously. 

“I’ll swell right up,” you repeat with a little smile that he doesn’t mirror, clearly not a man of humor, and you drop your hands to your side, “...kind of like a pufferfish.” You add quietly, looking at the ground as you say it. 

He coughs, his hand covering his mouth as you glance up at him, only to see him trying to hide the shocked laugh that had escaped him.

“Why didn’t you tell them?” He finally continues, and you hate the way all your hard work of just saying quiet isn’t working and is in fact, coming back to bite you in the ass. 

You shrug once more, shoving a grain of rice that was on the floor with the tip of your shoe.

“The first time it happened I figured I’d just tell them next time, but then that man kept on giving me more fish so I felt bad and I just never said anything.” 

Gojo stares at you, his eyes squinting together as if he were figuring out an enigma, a war strategy that even his best generals couldn’t get a grasp of. 

You look away, feeling like a fire was being lit under your skin. 

“Alright,” you say, clapping your hands together as your stomach grumbles once again, reminding you that it is still in desperate need of food, “I’ll be done soon. And I’ll clean up,” you promise, but you doubt he even cares as you begin to inch away from him. 

You watch as a strand of hair falls into his face, watch as he goes to move, never breaking his eye contact with you, until he looks behind you at the eggs and bread, and then to the window behind you, the moon as bright as ever.

He nods a final time, looking over you a final time before he exits. 

You make sure he’s far gone, letting out a heavy breath as you hold yourself up by the table, eyes wide at the fact that you had spoken more than two words to the man who seemed to despise your entire existence. 

You go back to your eggs, whisking them in silence as your mind reels. 

—

Gojo is there, for dinner, the following night. 

You enter the dining room to see him at the end of the table, already eating, and glances up briefly when he sees you walk in. 

Trying to hide the shock on your face you quickly look away, finding the way to your side of the table as you look around to see what they’ve given you tonight. A sigh of fleeting relief escapes your lips at the lack of fish, glad you’ll be going to sleep full of food tonight. 

You serve yourself, piling roasted meats and potatoes onto your plate as you fill your cup with water, not trusting wine after the last time you had it in his presence, and pretend that everything is normal as you pick up your knife and fork. 

His words rang in your mind from the last time, the fact that he ate in silence, so you forced yourself to clam up, knowing that it was probably from the best and save you from any more mortification. 

Your eyes fleet up now and then, grateful that he’s never looking up when you do, and give yourself some time to really take him in. Maybe in another universe where everything was normal, this could’ve just been another regular thing, and you try pretending that it is.

He’s probably only here because of a timing issue, you tell yourself, maybe this was the only time in the middle of training, state affairs, or other things that he was able to have dinner tonight. Yes, yes, that has to be it. 

You look back down at your plate, chewing as quietly as possible, missing the way he lifted his head to look up at you. 

—

Dinner with Gojo becomes a strange weekly occurrence.

The two of you eat in silence a couple of times a week, and every time it happens you’re so sure it’s going to be the last. 

On one of the nights you find yourself accompanied by the man you decide that the silence is more choking than whatever it is you find yourself saying. 

“Have you been notified about this…gathering in a couple of weeks?” 

This gathering was something you were told about that morning by Alina. One of the smaller families allied to the North, the Tokoshi’s, had invited you and your husband to join. 

“Yes,” Gojo says, and you’re a little surprised that he didn’t just give you a faint nod, “It shouldn’t be too big.” 

He cuts off a piece of his lamb, dipping it in some of the gravy as he glances up at you. 

You try to hide your excitement, not only from the fact that he’s spoken to you but also from the fact that this was an actual ball you would be able to go to. You knew that marrying him meant attending more of these sorts of events, but seeing how this was your first one, it was hard to not act a little giddy. 

“You have a lovely library,” you speak after carefully chewing through some of your food, your pointer finger resting on your fork as your legs crossed. 

Gojo glances up at you, those mesmerizing blue eyes finding yours from across the long table. 

“At my old home,” you pause briefly, wondering how he feels when you refer to his estate as your other home, “I wasn’t allowed to go into our library unless my tutors asked to have some of our sessions there. So I just wanted to say thank you for letting me - um, go there,” your words quiet down at the end, looking at the roasted pig in front of you momentarily as you wonder what you were even trying to get. 

He takes a sip of his wine. 

“The grounds are as much mine as they are yours,” he says, but his words sound rehearsed as if he were told to say this. 

“Even the east wing?” 

You regretted it the moment you asked it. 

Shit. 

Gojo opens his mouth and then shuts it. You chew on the inside of your cheek, waiting for him to speak, to say something, anything, but it reverts to that same silence that floods your senses and makes you aware of every other sound in the room.

Your burst of what you attempted at comedy seemed to keep coming back instantly in your face, a form of punishment for somebody who never knew how to make uncomfortable situations better.

Suddenly, all of your appetite is lost. Stupid, stupid, stupid, you can only chide yourself, the food in front of you, no matter how good it looked, felt like it would taste like ash on your tongue. You kept feeding this burning fire that was your marriage, expecting your hay-like words to act like water.

There’s a thick tension in the room, and you look around, blinking slowly as you fidget with your fingers. 

You try to go back to eating. 

You were wrong,

That initial silence was better. 

��-

That night you found yourself back in the kitchens. 

You’re wiping at your cheeks, hoping that the therapeutic motions of baking can help alleviate some of your many turmoils. 

When you were younger, you were used to silence. People normally avoided you, and those who didn’t weren’t ever your age. The cooks at your old estate were kind, but they were usually too busy to entertain a little girl. You would usually help the maids out with their washing and folding, rather doing something than nothing. You would listen in on their gossip and stories, always happy to be included. 

You assumed that it would be the same here. 

But the maids assured you that a lady of such high rank shouldn’t be meddling in such lowly tasks, and the cooks here were cooking for such a larger number of people that you knew you couldn’t bother them the way you used to. 

So you find yourself with a lot to say but nobody to say it to. The jokes and ideas that pop into your head fall flat because the old ladies who helped clean the bedsheets and used to laugh hearing them are no longer here. In those moments you’re with Alina or your other maids are sparse, and so you sometimes imagine that if you speak more when Gojo is around, he might warm up to you. 

You also had to remind yourself that your track record with men wasn’t the best either. Those fleeting crushes on some of the other boys who you’d see at balls always ended with them scurrying away from you as if you were the plague. The only other marriage offer you’d gotten was from a man who had struggled with finding a woman who could keep up with his awful ways. So the fact that Gojo Satoru, the most well-known man in the realm, didn’t want much to do with you wasn’t shocking. 

And Alina was right. A lot of wives aren’t as lucky to say their husbands don’t care, but you wondered how it would’ve been if he did. You exclaimed to her a couple of nights ago that you should’ve just married Naoya, but deep inside you knew that’s not what you wanted. A part of you knew ever since you agreed to this arrangement that you wouldn’t be getting an actual husband out of it. 

You sniffle, your eyes blurry. You don’t like crying in front of people, and so you allow yourself to do so in the pale moonlight of the kitchen, the only sound other than your ragged breathing being the repeated sound of flour falling softly in your mixing bowl. 

Baking was something that nobody ever could judge you about. You were good at it, and you knew you could do it with no error. Your cakes and pastries always turned out well, save for the minor problems you ran into as a kid, but you sometimes act like you’re baking for a group of people, about to take it out to see a sea of smiling faces who are happy to see you and your deserts.

“I thought you only cooked when they served fish for dinner.” 

A voice, one that’s seared into your memory, says from behind you. 

It takes everything in you not to jump from surprise, and it takes even more willpower not to turn around. 

You quickly wipe at your cheeks, breathing in to make sure your voice won’t come out in bits and pieces. You keep your back to your husband, continuing to sift your flour in the bowl, a continual motion like waves hitting against the dock.

“I’m baking,” you specify, cringing at the way you sound like you’re fighting a nasty cold. 

Gojo doesn’t say anything for a beat and does nothing to move. You’re glad he doesn’t, too scared that if he saw your puffy eyes or your tear-stained cheeks he’d begin to think that you have no backbone at all. It felt almost pathetic to have the world's strongest warrior see you recover from crying alone. 

He hums in the back of his throat at your words, and you wonder what he looks like right now. 

“I doubt these walls have seen a lady of such high rank before,” he comments, and you look up briefly from the mountain of white building up in the bowl, “They must whisper to themselves once you leave.” 

You let out a little puff of air, something resembling a soulless laugh. 

“Everyone whispers to themselves after I leave,” you say, reaching for a whisk, “I’ve heard more whispers than my own name.” 

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, and you hope he doesn’t notice the way you quickly try to wipe at the corners of your eyes.

“You come down here a lot,” it’s posed as a question, but Gojo says it like a statement. He must have eyes everywhere, reporting to him what you’re doing. You wouldn’t be shocked, but you just nod, chewing on the inside of your cheek as you begin to whisk your dry ingredients together. 

“I hope it’s okay,” you throw in a pinch of salt as you mix, “I like the kitchen.” 

He let out a little breath as if he was about to chuckle, but then he got confused. You decide to spare him the endless questions that must be going on in his head, wondering why somebody in your position would prefer the kitchens rather than anywhere else. 

“My bedroom used to be behind a kitchen. I’d have to go through the pantry just to reach it,” you turn briefly to grab your bowl with the wet ingredients, pouring it slowly into your flour and sugar mixture, mixing it in slowly and carefully. 

“My father’s wife wanted me out of sight. That estate had never used one of its actual bedrooms to sleep the daughter of a whore,” you can hear him inhale sharply, “I woke up to the sounds of people shouting for different ingredients, to pots and pans clanging against each other. I learned how to cook and bake when I was young, and I usually helped them cook the food my family would eat for dinner.” 

When your batter is all mixed through you go to find the pan you have buttered and dusted with sugar, pouring it in as you wipe off the side of the bowl that had some remnants of batter dripping from it.

“They never asked me to, but I liked it. I liked feeling useful,” you peek over to your side, seeing him leaning against the wall adjacent to you, silent as a mouse. 

You walk over to the other side of the kitchen with your pan, careful with the lid to the brick oven, heated with the fire you had lit an hour ago, and slide your cake pan into it, closing it shut as you stand up straight. 

Finally, you look over at him. 

His eyes rake over your face, lingering on the circles underneath your eyes, the redness that stained the whites of them. He’s clad in the simple tunic and breeches he had worn to dinner hours ago, his large shoulders leaning on the wall as his arms lay crossed over his chest. 

“I won’t go to the east wing,” you say in a whisper, your voice quiet but heavy as it falls from your lips as a promise, trying to muster up a smile but it comes out wobbly, “I was just trying to make you laugh.” 

His lips looked pinker than usual as if he had been chewing on them, something you often did when you were deep in thought. His white hair had been messily pushed back as if his fingers had been combing through them continuously. 

“These grounds are yours,” Gojo says, his words thick from his throat. His exhale and inhale mirror the way you breathe, your two chests rising as though living with the same lungs.

You shrug, a melancholy look on your face as you shake your head. 

“Maybe if I was your wife,” your words are said without any malice, “But I’m just another person who sleeps here.” 

Gojo tilts his head slightly as if your statement had somehow wrenched itself into his mind, weighing it down. Even in the limited light, you could see the way he looked at you, an unreadable expression on his face.

“I’m sorry about all of this. I know I took away your chance to marry somebody you actually wanted, but my father told me you were okay with the arrangement. I wouldn’t have agreed to it otherwise,” you twist your wedding ring around your finger mindlessly, a little habit you’ve grown over the weeks here, “I never wanted to be selfish, and I truthfully never wanted a husband. I just wanted a friend.”

—

Ever since that night, you eat your meals in your room. 

Alina protested, saying it’s not right to eat alone, but you told her not to think about it, saying how you liked the silence. 

You mustered up the courage to ask some of the coachmen to take you to the nearby town, starting by looking around at the little shops, keeping a hood over your head in case somebody saw a new stranger.

Sometimes you’d go inside the shops, finding little trinkets that you thought your maids might like, or ornaments that might help fill up the empty spots around your room. You’ve never been able to decorate before with how small your old room was, so you decided to take advantage of its space.

When you’re walking around you sometimes see Gojo, either in the training yard or walking around with one of his advisors. There have been moments when the two of you catch each other's stares from across the room, but you’re always the first to look away, making sure you’re going in a different direction than him. 

You knew that you’d have to talk to him eventually, especially with the gathering that was coming up at the Tokoshi manor, but each night you pretended it was another day away, instead of one day closer. 

Your maids came bustling in and out of your room more often than usual with preparations for the night that was closing in, shoving you into different dresses, not satisfied until they found the right one.

Alina noticed your shift in demeanor, never picking and prodding at it, but silently observing. You could tell she knew something was wrong, but you didn’t know how to put exactly what you were feeling in words. 

It didn’t help that the closer you got to the night of the event Gojo seemed to be everywhere you were. The gardens, the library, the field, the stables. He probably just had business to attend to, but it didn’t help that whenever he saw you it looked like he wanted to say something. It also didn’t help that you’d scurry away when you saw him open his mouth. 

The weeks turned into days, the days into a day, and that day into hours and you found yourself perched uncomfortably on a chair as three different women attended to your face, hair, and accessories. 

You watch them work silently, taking in all the jewelry and makeup that you’ve been looking forward to wearing. It’s nothing too drastic, but that 

girl who longed to wear pretty things inside of you is gleaming right now. 

“…Lord Gojo requested for her to wear another pair of earrings,” one of your maids says, looking at the earrings Alina had picked out for you. 

Your ears perk up at the mention of his name, watching Alina as she perks an eyebrow up. 

“When did he request that?” 

The older lady looks at you in the mirror and then at Alina. 

“A couple of nights ago,” she shows Alina another pair, a sapphire one that seems to gleam brightly, “he dropped them off when she was…away…” the maid trails off, noticing the fact that you were eavesdropping.

Your eyes dart away as if that would help, but she quickly changes the topic, and you huff in annoyance as Alina sends you a knowing look.  

“Your husband is a strange man,” Alina mutters in your ear as you giggle quietly, rolling your eyes as she playfully shoves your shoulder. 

You don’t say anything in retaliation, and sit back as you put in your new earrings, grateful that they still complimented the color of your dress, and try to pretend you are going down for dinner rather than a gathering with people you didn’t know. 

You’ve been learning this entire week how to properly hold a spoon and fork, and how to cut your food appropriately. You’ve been taking dancing lessons, discovered how to properly greet people, and even learned how to gracefully enter and exit a horse-drawn carriage. All things you should’ve probably learned earlier, but were never able to. 

Alina helps you out of the chair when they are all done, giving you a second to look into the mirror. The dress they had wrangled you into was beautiful, your hair done in the way you liked. You thanked them all, expressing your endless gratitude for their hard work. 

You take a deep breath as you exit the room and go out into the hall, leading yourself down the stairs and through multiple corridors, trying to calm down your palpitating heart. 

It takes a few minutes but you find yourself at the front of the manor, standing alone and looking around, trying to see if you were at the wrong place. But in the distance, you can see the coachmen and the carriage, the door shut, still waiting for you. 

You take a tentative step forward, nearing the entranceway that leads outside, but feel a soft touch hovering above your elbow. 

It’s strange how he usually finds you before you find him, but as somebody who’s trained to know and find things before others do, you suppose it makes sense. You glance to your side, already expecting to see those cerulean eyes as you look up. 

Gojo looks good, somehow better than usual. 

He’s clad in dark blue garments, intricate with Northern design, and your eyes look up and down his entire body. His usual muscular build seems to be outlined by the stretch of his overcoat, the way the fabric is sitting snugly over his chest. 

He seems to be doing the same, though. You can feel his gaze drop to your dress, to the way your lips are a little redder than usual, your hair done in a way that suits your face. His eyes linger on your ears, and there’s a small, barely noticeable tug to the corners of his lips. 

“Ready?” Gojo asks, the first time he’s spoken in a couple of weeks, and you hum. 

He takes his hand away from your elbow as he rests it on the small of your back, and you feel heat travel from his fingertips through the fabric, through your corset, your undergarments, and straight to your skin. 

They bring the carriage out a little closer, a coachman opening the door for you. You brace yourself, heaving your dress upwards as you go to grasp the rail on the side.

But Gojo moves swiftly, offering you his glove-clad hand as you look over at him in surprise, taking it after a moment of hesitation, and haul yourself inside. 

It’s far bigger than the one you usually take to town, and you settle for a corner on the left-hand side near the window. The walls of the carriage are lined with this sort of fabric that feels like it’s lighter than a cloud, colored the traditional blue of the Gojo family. You’d guess it could fit at least an entire family comfortably, so you’re not too worried about the underskirt of your dress taking up too much space.

You watch Gojo follow you in. He looks around, having to duck his head (and a lot of his back) as he sits in front of you, pushing the strands of hair that had fallen into his face.

The two of you sit in awkward silence, your gaze settled on the door that they shut after Gojo entered, and your eyes quickly fall to your hands resting in your lap, neatly folded.

The carriage starts a little bit later, the wheels humming to life as the coachmen yip at the horses to start. The sudden rocking movement that you’ve become familiar with sways you side to side, and suddenly you're totally aware of the fact that you’re alone in a limited space with the man you’ve been avoiding for the better half of two weeks. 

You can feel his stare boring into the side of your head, can hear the way his breathing is coming out strangely as if he wanted to talk, but kept stopping himself off before he could say a word. 

“Did you like the earrings?” Gojo finally asks, and you glance up, eyes narrowing for a second in confusion as realization suddenly comes rushing in. 

“Hm? O-oh, yes!” You quickly stutter out, your hands flying to your ears as if you forgot they were there, “Yes, thank you. They were beautiful. They kind of looked like the inside of a belly button,” you say.

Your husband blinks, brows furrowed slightly as you think about what you had just said, eyes wide in shock.  

“Er…well, gods, no, not bellybuttons,” your head falls to your hands as you shake your head profusely, “Sorry, they don’t look like belly buttons-” 

But you stop when you hear a small laugh from him, quiet as he looks away for a second, a tiny slightly visible grin on his face as he looks back at you. 

“Did you know that sometimes,” his eyes are a little upturned as if he fighting back an actual smile, “I make a bet with myself about what you’re going to say?” 

You smile slightly, your head cocking to the side. 

“Have you ever won?” 

Gojo chuckles, and your eyes suddenly fall to his hand, at the way he’s fidgeting with his ring, his wedding ring, the same way you seem to do whenever you’re thinking about everything and anything all at once. 

“Not once.” 

You grin, and though you still feel this heavy weight of unspoken things resting in the middle of you two, you decide not to acknowledge it at the moment. Things unsaid, unheard, weaved through the air, tying you and him together like a tapestry. 

You fidget with your skirt, looking out the window at the moving scenery. 

Gojo breathes deeply through his nose, his pointed finger tapping on his thigh. 

“I’ve been meaning to talk to you,” he finally says, and your eyes dart away from the trees and the sky to look over at him. 

His bottom lip is caught underneath his teeth, his blue eyes shining with a different hue. He takes up a lot of room with just his size alone, but it looks like he’s trying to make himself seem less intimidating, less of a warrior, and more of a…person.

You don’t say anything, opting to stay quiet to see what it is that he is trying to formulate into words. 

“That night,” Gojo twists his ring back and forth with his thumb, “I…” It’s weird to see somebody so sure of themself struggle to speak, and your brows crease in the middle, not knowing what it was he was trying to get at. 

“I wanted to tell you that you too had a right to a good husband. Somebody who didn't rush you into a marriage because of his own mistakes…somebody you wanted.”

Where is he going with this?

You suddenly feel your throat dry up, swallowing thickly as Gojo looks out the window momentarily before looking back at you. 

“My parents never told me who I’d be marrying,” Gojo explains, his voice hoarse, “I figured out the day of the wedding,” he twisted his wedding ring, looking at the way it shined, “And I wanted to hate you,” 

His words punch you square in the gut, but you can only bring yourself to keep on looking at him.

“I wanted to hate you so much because it would be easier to act like this wasn’t my fault if I could…but,” he sighs, his chest rising and falling, “I don’t think it’s possible to hate you.” 

Your lip trembles slgihtly, a sheen over your eyes. What is he doing?

“I’ve been raised in a way most people our age aren’t. My parents wanted me to be the strongest so was put into training since I was four, and I think this entire time I’ve been trying to approach you like a…military strategy. You were this map in my head that no matter how I approached it nothing made sense. But that night, in the kitchen, everything finally did.” 

Your eyes flitter downwards so that he couldn’t see the waver in them

“You didn’t deserve how you were treated in your old life, nor this new one,” his hand covers his chest, and you feel lightheaded, “And I promise to you I’ll do everything in my power to make this one better. If you don’t want me as a husband, than as a friend.

“I’d like to be your friend, if you’d allow me,” he whispers thickly, his voice heavy. He fidgets with his fingers, moving them together and back out again, and you notice how he does this a lot whenever you’re near.

Your heart is beating so quickly that you feel like it's going to stop, and your mind is working so hectically that you don’t know what to think. This is the same man who looked at you as if you had torn down the moon and stars when he saw you the first time, the man who never seemed to be that interested in what it is you had to say. The very same person who would’ve rather married a broomstick than you. 

…right? 

And yet he’s here, asking to be your friend. Something that nobody has ever asked before, something that people wouldn’t ever dare to murmur out loud to you. He had no beneficial gain from doing this, no ally that he would please if he offered to be your friend.

Your heart twists because why does he look like he cares about what you say? His eyes are creased slightly around the edges, his lips pressed together as if he were preparing for whatever outcome it was to what you said.

Nobody has ever told you those things, the things that made years of pain and hurt strummed into one beat that your heart never wanted to drum to. This man, your husband, Gojo, was supposed to be another cog in that old machine, one that hummed and spurred like it was about to eat you alive. 

But the more you look at him, the more you let your unspoken words speak in silence for you, you realise that he isn’t lying.

You open your mouth to speak but are cut off when the carriage comes to a sudden halt. 

The two of you look at each other and then to the door, watching as it opens up, greeted to the sight of a large manor with multiple people walking in hand in hand. You swallow your bile, not knowing what to say, deciding to flee instead of face him like you should’ve. 

—

The gathering itself was far more boring than you imagined it to be. 

You and Gojo had the mutual understanding to act more…well, like a couple, than you actually were. You didn’t comment on the way his arm circled around your waist a couple of minutes into making your rounds talking with people or the endearing way he referred to you as my wife. 

You’re glad that he doesn’t do anything to talk about what he had told you in the carriage whenever the two of you were alone, acting like nothing was wrong and everything was normal as he inquired about your day. 

You told him brief things, still trying to shove his words out of your mind, but it was no use. I’d like to be your friend, your mind kept repeating, and you were too scared of brining it up in case he had changed his mind in between those minutes of quiet.

People you had never seen before congratulated you on your new marriage, their brows raised in that excited way as they motioned to your stomach, hinting at a special little someone who might be joining your lives soon. 

“Soon!” You said with a curt laugh, glancing momentarily at Gojo only to see him already looking at you, a light blush dusting his cheeks.

He made sure not to stay with people who were strangers to you for too long, not wanting to bore you to death, and allowed you to take in more of the well-lit and vastly decorated manor. 

Though its size was incomparable to the Gojo estate, it was still massive. The Tokoshi family had been a family with the Gojo one for centuries, so there was no question that the riches they had amassed over the years by being trading partners with them had culminated in this. 

Gojo told you earlier in the carriage, before everything else, how the young Tokoshi couple were good people. They liked to throw parties a couple of times a year, inviting only a select few. He liked them far more than a lot of the other people he had been forced to grow up with over the years. 

You look at the dining hall, at the corridors with openings that allow you to look outside without the glare of glass. His arm never left your body, holding you close to him as he let you walk around, your mouth hanging open slightly as you craned your neck to look at everything. Candles were lit everywhere, the bouquets of different assortments of flowers decorating the stone flower holders carved into the walls. 

You mentioned to him in the privacy of the carriage, that you hadn’t ever been able to experience a party of this sort of caliber before. You could see how he wanted to ask more questions, but you could see the answers already formulating his head as to why.

“We probably look like one of those couples where the wife’s dying and the husband takes her out to see the stars one last time,” you whisper to him, still looking around in a stunned sort of way at the beauty of it all. 

Gojo’s head ducks down a bit, trying to hide the chuckle that had broken out and made its way onto his face. He coughs into his fist as if that was the issue, but you look over at him to see the humor in his eyes. 

“Did you lose your bet again?” You ask, glancing at him from the corner of your eyes as he looks like he’s fighting the grin that’s threatening to take over. 

“I’m always losing that bet,” he tells you.

Though he doesn’t do anything to bring up his conversation, you can see it in the way he looks at you, as if he’s still teetering on an edge, wanting to know what you were thinking in that frazzled mind of yours. 

You decide to push past it.

“Can I get in on it?” You ask, turning slightly so that you face him, very aware of the fact that his hand hasn’t moved from its spot on your waist.

You try not to think about it, reminding yourself that it’s just for show, but you can’t stop the feeling of heat that travels wherever it is he seems to touch you. His hand is larger than an average one, his fingers moving mindlessly up and down on your corseted stomach. 

“Do you need the extra coin?” His voice is carrying a strange tone…is he teasing you? 

But again, you try not to think about it, it’s all for show, (you also try not to think too much of the fact that you’re pretty separated from everybody else).

“No, I just need coin,” you explain, fixing one of the medallions on his chest that had been slightly slanted, “I have nearly nothing left.” 

Gojo moves barely away from you, his eyes searching yours as if to find the joke. 

“Have you run through my family gold already?” His voice is still toying, but now it’s filled with a little confusion. 

“No, of course not,” you snort, rolling your eyes as you tilt your chin up to look at him better, “I haven’t touched any of your gold. I just ran through mine.” 

His brows quirks upward, mouth parting slightly. 

“You’ve emptied the gold your family sent up?” 

It’s your turn to be confused. 

“What gold?” You ask, moving away from him, his hand falling to his side, and you suddenly miss his warmth. 

You remember your father talking about how the Gojo family had rejected your initial dowry, saying something along the lines of outlandish practices, but aside from that, you weren’t told about any other sort of money that was supposed to be sent with you. 

He pinches the bridges of his nose, sighing deeply. 

“The gold that they sent with you? It wasn’t supposed to be a lot but it was supposed to suffice for the journey here.” 

You blink owlishly at him. 

“What gold have you run through?” He specifies, plastering on a fake smile when he catches the eyes of somebody behind you, but then focuses his stare back to you. 

“Well…” you shrug, “My gold.” 

Gojo looks like he’s about to make a new bet, one that’s with every time you’ve almost given him an aneurysm trying to figure out your strange riddles and rhymes that are supposed to be actual words. 

“I used to make some gold at my old home,” you explain, keeping your voice low in case somebody was somewhere that you hadn’t seen, but realizing that Gojo was lost, you continued, “The stable boy gave me some of his salary if I took care of the horses and cleaned the stables. Sometimes he’d give me extra if I could haul in the large bags of hay.” 

He scoffs, shaking his head slightly. 

“Why?” That seems to be a question he’s been asking lately. 

You shrug again, feeling his hand circle back around your waist as some people come near you, 

“I needed new clothes and my shoes had holes in them. My father’s wife didn’t let him give me much, so I tried to fill in the gaps.”

You smile at one of the couples that are coming near you, going back into your other persona as you begin chatting with them. Gojo pulls you in tighter to his side, staying silent. You don’t notice the way he hasn’t stopped staring at you, nor the way his heart seems to have churned so painfully in his chest. 

—

The night progresses and you find yourself inside the dining hall, being shown to your seats by one of the maids, finding your name next to Gojo’s on a name card. 

The two of you sit down, watching the people the file in, the sound of laughter filling the room, the clinking of china against each other filling in the rest of the silence. You take it all in with a smile, looking every and at everyone.

“I hope I’m not embarrassing you,” you whisper as you lean closer to Gojo, an apologetic smile on your face as you sit further into your seat, “This is all just so new to me.” 

You don’t see the ways his eyes soften, his hand inching closer to yours as he shakes his head. 

“You’re not embarrassing me,” he murmurs back, leaning his head closer to yours, wanting his words only to be heard by you, “I’m glad you’re enjoying this.” The smile that makes its way onto your face could power the universe, and Gojo feels like the wind had been knocked from his lungs, far worse than in training when somebody's foot slams into his chest. 

“I am!” Your enthusiastic and hurried words are hushed, but he can still hear the way you’re trying to hide your joy. The small talk is horrific,” he laughs a little bit, “but still I love it.” 

He opens his mouth to speak but is cut off by the sound of a knife hitting glass. 

“Everyone! Give me your time, just for a moment!” Miyo Tokoshi, whom you spoke to briefly, stands up, his chair behind him.

All eyes in the room fall on him, people still smiling, their teeth glimmering in the light. 

“I cannot express my joy to be in a room with you all tonight,” he says, looking around the room, making sure he saw everyone for a split second. “And my wife and I couldn’t be more ecstatic to host the first gathering of the season!”

You look at the woman sitting next to him, Lana, who you had also met momentarily, is gleaming at him, her face full of genuine adoration. She, along with everybody else, claps, laughing joyfully. 

You wonder if this is what a real husband and wife should look like, and you look briefly over to Gojo, your mind reeling with the charade the two of you have been playing this entire night. 

“And we couldn’t be happier to welcome the first couple of the year,” he exclaims, pointing his glass over to you and Gojo, saying your name and then your husbands as he claps his hand softly against his wrist, “May every moment you spend together be better than the last. We wish the two of nothing but a lifetime of happiness and prosperity. 

Gojo raised his glass to him, his hand grasping yours as he lifted it to his lips, planting a kiss on the back of it. 

You feel like you’ve stopped breathing with the linger of his lips on your skin, the last time that happened on the night of your wedding, and watching him grasp it even tighter when he sets it back down, weaving his fingers through yours. 

Stop, you chide, raising your glass as well, a shaky smile on your face, it’s just an act.

He winks at the two of you, nodding once more as he focuses his stare somewhere down the table, obstructed by where you are sitting.

“And to the future couple! Naoya and Freya!” 

Gojo turned his head immediately to look at you, watching the color drain from your face, and before you knew it, the man, Naoya, was standing up, a hand over his chest in faux gratitude as he thanked the host. 

You could never mistake that hair, the feline look in his eyes as he scanned across the room, a slimy smile on his face. You watch as it grows even wider when he finally catches his prey when he finally sees you, and you feel nauseous, like you’re about to throw up all those little crackers they had given you earlier that evening. 

The hand holding yours squeezes, knowing he can’t say anything right now, and you swallow thickly, eyes darting over to his as you feel your head about to sway. 

Naoya’s here. The man you turned down for Gojo. 

The rest of Tokoshi’s speech is muted to you. It feels like your head is being held underwater, and you feel sweat dotting your forehead, your chest, and your palms. You can feel Gojo’s eyes on the side of your head and can tell he’s trying to tell you something silently. 

The clinking of glass brings you out of your haze, looking up mindlessly as you haphazardly clink yours against Gojo’s, rubbing a hand down your face as if that would help. 

You're grateful for the flurry of movements and noises, everybody talking to somebody, the people beginning to serve themselves the wide array of food places in front of them. 

Gojo squeezes your hand one more time, and you finally look over at him, trying to muster up a smile but with how queasy you feel and the way your head spinning, it probably looks like you’re about to be sick all over him. 

“I’ll be okay,” you say through clenched teeth. 

Gojo nods, his thumb rubbing up and down your hand in a soothing way. It’s just for show. 

“I’m sorry my palms are sweating,” you laugh mirthlessly, and he squeezes it again, you’re sure he’s only doing this because of the extra attention of the two of you ever since they realized you and Naoya were in the same room, “you don’t have to keep holding it.” 

“Do you want me to let go?” He asks, and you stop poking around at the turnips on your plate. 

No. 

“N-no,” you croak out, desperate for his touch that’s grounding you, “No, please.” 

Gojo nods, his thumb not stopping its comforting motion of moving up and down. 

“Don’t worry,” he mutters, leaning closer to you as you duck your head so that your ears are near his lips, “My hands get sweaty too.” 

You laugh quietly and it sounds like wind chimes. You look at Gojo and watch as his lips tug upwards into a soft smile, one you had never seen before, and one you thought you never would. 

—

You tried to hide away the rest of the party, but Gojo didn’t seem to mind. 

When it was time to leave you accepted the gracious hug of the hosting couple, promising them that you’d come back for a more private dinner, and let Gojo lead you out into the courtyard where all the carriages were held. 

You slept the entire ride home, not wanting to mess anything up by taking, and you’re happy that Gojo didn’t bother you. You felt groggy when you returned to the estate, grateful for Gojo’s steady hand as he helped you out of the carriage. The two of you looked like you wanted to say something, but couldn’t, so you bid each other good night and went your separate ways.

Separate except for one brief moment. 

You were walking away and up the stairs when you suddenly stopped, remembering what it was that you wanted to tell him. You call out his name, watching as he turns, white brows slightly furrowed. 

“I…” you start but realize you didn’t exactly have a plan for what you wanted to say. He gives you his patience, not looking annoyed or frustrated when you try to think of the right words to string together. 

“I…I would like to be your friend too,” you finally say, and watch as a smile forms on his face, his pink lips tugging upwards in a way that made his eyes shine, the way your earrings did in the candlelight. 

He rakes his hand through his snow-white locks, pushing them away from his face. 

“I’ll see you at breakfast then,” Gojo says, and you dip your head down in a small smile. 

You give him a small wave, disappearing as you round the corner.

And since then, you found him joining you not only for breakfast or the sparse dinners but for any meal he possibly could. 

Gojo talked more, about anything and everything, and you did the same. 

You realized that he was actually an open person the closer you got to him, seeing that he too was capable of laughing and making jokes, his teasing eyes growing more frequent the closer your chairs got to the dinner table until you eventually just sat side-by-side, growing tired of shouting at each other across its length. 

On the days he wasn’t busy with strategizing or talking to other lords, he’d walk around the estate with you, telling you stories from his childhood, the times he’d run amock around the halls. Other times the two of you would go into town, looking at the different stores together. 

You could tell he was trying, could see it in the way he glanced at you from time to time to make sure that you were doing well. 

He’d accompany you to the library if you asked him to, and you’d go down sometimes to the training yard just to see him. Gojo would never tell you how much he tried to show off when you were there and knew he never had to. You could see the way he tried to appear even stronger when fighting with one of the other men, the poor soldier coming out with bruises and cuts all over his body.

Over many weeks, you find yourself looking forward to spending time with him, and a part of your cracked self begins mending itself again. 

It felt like after years of searching for somebody, somebody found you. 

On one of the nights when his sparring had gone on for far longer than it usually does, you decided to head down to the training yard after your night bath, tugging on a large robe over yourself as you walked the familiar stone steps down to where you knew he was. 

You could hear them before you saw them, a cacophony of fists hitting skin, groans, shouts from one another. There was a little perch from where you could watch what was happening below, and you usually hid yourself in a corner so that they wouldn’t see you. 

You’d rest on a pillar, arms crossed over your shoulder as you looked at the men below. Gojo was always easy to find, the flurry of white hair a tall-tale sign of where he was. You had watched him before, but you never got tired of it. You found it almost inhuman the way his movements seemed to flow like water, the way his hits were precise and direct. 

Gojo truly was the best warrior the North had ever seen, and sometimes you forget that you’re married to a man who brought down entire armies with just his bare fists. 

You watch as he jests with one of his friends, his chest rising a little bit at an irregular pace, slightly out of breath, but happy to be there. He turns to one of the guys behind him to say something, but his eyes immediately track upwards to the figure trying to stay hidden, you and a wide smile break out on his face. 

He waves at you, and it gets the attention of the other men there. They all turn to see where you are, their boyish grins and calls making you roll your eyes at their antics, your face heating up slightly as you wave back at them. 

Gojo says something to the person next to him, and you hear the man shout at the other ones to wrap it up for the night. Some of them wave goodbye to you as they begin exiting, going back to their common rooms. 

You make a move to lean slightly over the railing, your arms crossed over the wood as you peer down at the ground where Gojo remained alone, finding him to already be looking up at you. 

“Care to come down?” He juts his chin at the staircase to your left, the one that leads down to the courtyard, and you nod, disappearing behind the stone pillars as you take the steps leading downwards. 

You’ve been here a couple of times, as per your own request. You wanted to see what they did during training, what the training yard actually looked like from the ground. You lift the ends of your dress up slightly as you near the bottom, rounding the corner to see Gojo standing in the middle. 

He’s waiting for you, his eyes tracking your movements as you come near to him. 

His nose twitches slightly, his eyes squinting as he lifts his head in the air, suddenly picking up the scent of something unusual. 

“What’s that smell?” Gojo asks as you come to him, his eyes looking over your body as if it were emitting from you. 

You scoff, appalled, and then suddenly remember that Alina had applied some lavender oil to you after your bath. 

“If it’s a good smell then me,” you cross your arms over your chest, nose wrinkling in disgust as you take in his smell of sweat and grime, “If bad then you.”

Gojo snorts, coming closer to you as he continues sniffing, exaggerating the sound. You step away from him slightly, the smell of sweat overpowering, and he takes notice of this. 

“What?” He inquires, annoyed that you are moving away from him, and he takes a step closer. 

“What do you mean what?” You tease, moving again as he tries to smell the air, “You smell like an army of unshowered men. I just took a bath.” 

Gojo seems offended at this, trying to move back closer to you but you side-step him, apparently serious about this. 

“You really won’t let me come near you?” He sounds like you’ve kicked him down, his cheeks stained pink from earlier, and you laugh slightly, shaking your head. 

“I really won’t,” you affirm, shoving the back of your wrist to him to show him that what he was smelling was in fact you, “See? Lavender oil.” 

Gojo just seems to be getting more annoyed the more you try to evade him, his blue eyes swirling with an idea as you look at him in worry. 

“No, the smell is coming from somewhere else.” He argues, changing his footing so that he stands right in front of you and you let out a shocked laugh, not expecting this as you take a step back. 

You don’t know where else he can smell the lavender oil. Alina dotted it to your wrists and your neck, but surely can’t differentiate the difference in location…right? 

“Come here,” he almost whines, “I’m not going to rub off my smell onto you.” 

You laugh again out loud, picking up the skirt of your dress as you try to outrun him slightly. 

“You will!” You insist, motioning to the sheen of sweat on his body, “You reek of sweat. I swear it’s just lavender oil!” 

He groans, his eyes rolling to the back of his head at this inconvenience. 

“You’re killing me right now,” Gojo dramatically grabs his chest, “You won’t let me smell this strange aroma and it’s killing me,” his face breaking into a little pout as you laugh even louder, shocked at how petulant he was being. Your laughing seemed to spur him on even more, running towards you as you ran backward, hoping you didn’t trip on the fabric of your dress. 

“You have a plethora of bottles of lavender oil in your own room,” you argue, “this isn’t something innovative that you’ve never smelled before.” 

Gojo shakes his head, and your heart flutters at the way his smile is so playful and teasing, the way some of his hair falls into his face in that messy way when he’s usually training and not caring about his appearance. 

“It’ll only take a second,” he reasons and you shake your head no, your eyes both shining with playful laughter. 

The courtyards lead out into the large fields of the Gojo estate, and you look behind yourself at the opening. It’s night, there’s nobody around. Nobody would judge you for running away from your sweaty husband. 

You look back at him, see the gleam in his eyes, and know that he’s not going to back down. 

He can see the thoughts forming in your head, can assume them before they’re even created, and so he’s straight on your heels as you sprint away from him, a large smile on your face as you squeal out loud. 

“Please!” You shout over your shoulder, running down the little hill as the moon lights the way for you, “I just took a bath! Leave me alone!” 

You can hear the grass rustling beneath your feet, your screams of laughter contagious as you try to outrun the fastest person ever, and try not to slow yourself down by looking over your shoulder to see where he is. 

But after a couple of seconds of running you realize that the only footsteps you hear are your own, and you pause momentarily to look behind you and are surprised to see that he’s not there. 

Did he not come after you? 

You look around the field, the large blades of grass looking like waves that move with the wind, and whip your head around every time you hear a twig snap. 

You're a little bit further away from the manor itself, and the only thing you can see besides its large stone walls are the torches lit outside. You can make out the guards who are standing outside, but no sign of Gojo. 

You try to catch your breath, confused as to where he could’ve gone when a force stronger than a horse running at full speed slams into your side. 

The scream you let out echoes around the field, and you brace yourself for the harsh impact of hitting the ground. With your eyes squeezed shut you wait for the flash of pain, but peek them open to see Gojo framing your head with one of his hands, his body shielding you from the impact as he lays on top of you. 

“How…?” You scream, your chest moving up and down with your fit of giggles, trying to push him off of you, “You’re a beast!” You cry out, moving your head to the side as he laughs along with you, his chest rumbling with the movement. 

You shove his face away with the palm of your hands, shoving your wrist into his nose as if that would satiate him. 

“I took a bath you behemoth!” You whine, thinking about the dirt and mud that must be staining your skin and dress right now, “Are you so void of any good fragrance in your life that you must hunt me down for it?” 

Gojo tsks, shaking his head as he swats your wrist aside. 

He’s also slightly out of breath, most likely because he ran across and entire field from another entranceway that you weren’t aware of to catch you off guard, and you’re suddenly very aware of just how close to two of you are together. 

His hand is still cradling your head, the other one holding your hips. Truthfully he doesn’t even smell bad, which is frustrating that it’s just another one of his many talents. 

He judges your jaw up with his nose, and you helplessly comply, your heart hammering wildly as he leans in closer to the skin of your neck, taking in a whiff as he looks back up to you, his eyes gleaming. 

Gojo’s hand on your hip moves up slightly to hold your waist, not hard, but to stop you from squirming around. 

“It smells different here,” he nudges your neck with his nose again, and your breathing hitches, “Smells sweeter.” 

You swallow thickly, blinking slowly as you crane your neck slightly upwards to give him more room. It’s like your body is moving on its own, and you’re not to sure how you know what to do, but you just do. 

“That’s not possible,” you try to argue, trying your best to keep your voice from wavering, “You just lack the nose for good oils.” 

Gojo laughs lowly, shaking his head at your antics as he braces his knees on either side of your thighs, caging you in. 

“I have a very keen sense of smell,” he boasts and you snort, looking away as he pinches your hip to which you yelp.

His hand moves away from your head and to your shoulder, to where your nightgown had slightly slipped off and runs a thumb down a patch of your skin where it was slightly raised, a faint scar on your collarbone. 

“Where’d you get this?” His voice is slightly hushed, and you look down from your chin to where he is talking about. 

 “Hm?” You look around, see that he’s pointing to the tiniest little scar, and chuckle slightly, “Oh, that?” Your eyes squint as you try to remember, “I tried to climb up a tree once when I was little and fell.” Gojo huffs out a little laugh, his eyes still focused on your skin as you chew on the inside of your cheek.

“It probably looks far worse compared to anything you have,” you say sarcastically, “The family physician kept saying I wasn’t going to make it through the night.” 

He scoffs, rolling his eyes at your antics as he raises himself, moving away from you as he sits back down on the grass. You miss his warmth, the way his heat radiated onto you like a furnace. 

“I don’t know how you keep surviving between your inability to consume fish and your near-death occurrences,” Gojo’s voice holds a teasing tone and you smile, moving up so that you’re facing him. 

You rest your weight back on your hands, kicking your legs out in front of you as your skirt flows around the grass. A while ago you would’ve felt improper sitting like this in front of anyone, but you don’t seem to care all that much when it’s Gojo. 

“I showed you my battle would,” you say, putting one leg on top of the other, “What’s your worst one?” You ask, tilting your head to the side in questioning. 

Gojo purses his lip, thinking. 

You imagine that he’d tell you or probably motion to where it was, but a second later you watch, shocked, as he tugs his tunic upwards, your face heating as he rises it slightly so that you can see a part of his stomach. 

You hate how utterly built he is. 

His skin is pulled taught over the smooth stomach of his abs, his chest huge with pure muscle, his arms, bulging through the sleeves. It’s something you thought you’d get used to, something you told yourself to stop ogling at, but never could.

But you shift your focus to a large scar that runs across his chest, from the bottom of his hip under his arm. It still looks relatively new, and the scar itself still pink. You could see the way it was jagged, not one smooth line, and gods, fuck, why do you want to touch it?

“Well,” you try to think of something witty to say, seeing the way he’s looking at you as if waiting for it, “Clearly not as bad as mine, but it comes in as a close second.” 

He throws his head back as he laughs, his muscles contracting as he does so. You feel flushed, not able to look away from the scar, knowing that you were merely compensating for not knowing what to say. 

“I know,” he says eventually with a shrug, looking down as he surveys the scar, “It’s not as bad as it could’ve been.” 

You pout slightly, thinking. 

“Does it hurt?” 

He looks up at you, at the way you can’t take your eyes away from it, and shakes his head. 

“Not anymore,” he sits up a little straighter, closer to you as you watch him move, “Sometimes I can feel it sting, but it’s barely noticeable.” 

You beg to differ. 

The two of you don’t say anything and a part of you has decided that silence is bad for you. Because before you can really think about what you’re doing, you push yourself upwards, leaning in closer to him as you try to get a better look at it. 

He doesn’t say anything, but if only you could see the way he could barely use his lungs to breath right now you’d make some sly remark about how the best warrior of the North was growing shy from just a look. 

But suddenly you’re not looking anymore as you shuffle in a little closer, your fingers reaching upwards to touch the skin. 

You can hear the wind move around you, the grass rustiling as your fingers run across the scar. His abs flex at the coldness of your hand, but he doesn’t tell you to stop. You’re studying it intently, wondering what sort of weapon could’ve caused this. 

Gojo’s size dwarfs over yours, but you don’t seem to mind. Your lips as slightly pursed as you take it in. 

“Did you fight a bear?” You finally ask, peeking up to look at him. 

You’re startled by the way the flush on his cheeks has grown even more red, or the way you can’t see the blues in his eyes anymore. Has he always looked like that?

Gojo shakes his head, taking in a shaky breath, looking at the top of your head as you go back to looking at the scar. 

“Nearly,” he tries to joke, but his voice is weak, laced with need, “But I doubt a bear would even want to be compared to the man who gave me the scar.” 

You look up, your brow quirked in curiosity. 

“Who?” You ask, shocked at how quiet your voice came out. 

Gojo smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. His tongue clicks against his teeth, his hand rising up to grab yours, pulling it away from his chest. He can’t bear to have you touching him like that anymore, not trusting himself to restrain the pure desire that bubbling inside his veins. 

“Naoya,” he says hushed, watching as your lips part and eyes widen. 

There’s a beat of silence, a moment when you think you can hear your heart beating in the same rhythm his is. 

Your hand curls into itself, shock taking over your features as your eyes drop to his scar and then back up to him. You find yourself wanting to say everything and anything, but can’t somehow find the words that you’re looking for. Gojo beats you to it, thankfully. 

“I’ve been having this recurring dream ever since I fought him of that same moment over and over again when he cut me open. But it’s changed, recently,” He sits up straighter, so close to you that your chests are almost touching, “And I keep seeing him marrying you, what would’ve happened if you had said yes.”

“And gods, fuck,” he ducks his head down, raking an agitated hand through his hair, making it even more messy, “I…” He chokes on his breath, looking back at you, and suddenly you see the glossiness in his eyes, the way that tears brim his waterline. 

And suddenly you see the Gojo Satoru, the Lord in the North, the most powerful man alive, cry. 

“I keep reprimanding Naoya in my head about how awful he is, about how I’d kill nearly every person alive if he ever touched you, b-but I was just as awful. I think about the first time I saw you, about the first weeks you were here. I think about how you must’ve felt, how alone you were. Every day…” he wipes messily at his cheeks, his lips wobbling, “Every day I wake up and think of you. I think about your face, your smile, your eyes, your lips, the way your nose scrunches, that line between your brows when you're confused, and every night I go to sleep hoping that this was all an awful dream and I haven’t ruined your life, but then I wake up, and it starts all over again.” 

“I know I’m a selfish man,” Gojo says with a wet chuckle, his cheeks wet with tears, “I know I shouldn’t, but I want you to myself, I want you forever. I want to be your friend, I want to be the person you sleep next to, the person you go to when you want to talk about your little stories. I want to hear your jokes and I want to see you laugh. I want to hold your hand, I want to put that ring on your finger every morning, and I want to propose to you each night.”

He shakes his head, swallowing his cries down, the moon lighting the tear tracks that start from his eyes and end at his chin. 

“But I know you don’t want that. You told me that you wanted a friend, but…” he shrugged, his smile sad, aching, longing, “I think along the way of being your friend I realized I wanted to be your husband too.” 

“I understand if you want to leave. I’ll tell my parents the truth, they’ll understand. I have a house ready for you near the sea, one away from your family, where you can start over.” 

The wind rustles the hills, and you look at the field, watch the way it moves in tandem with the life around it. 

You can feel the tears forming in your eyes, and know that even if you blink them away it’ll do nothing to actually hide them. There’s a burning feeling in your chest, one that you’ve never felt before, one that rings with Gojo’s words. 

You run your fingers through the grass, looking up at him with a certain fire in your eyes.

“What if I don’t want that?”

He blinks slowly. 

“I,” Gojo sniffs, nodding profusely, hoping you don’t see the way he crumbles, “I understand, I promise I do. The house is a couple days-” 

“No,” you cut him off firmly, wiping your palms furisuly across your cheeks, to rid them of the pesky tears, shaking your head, “What if I don’t want that?” You move up to him, reaching your hand down his tunic, your fingers moving against is chest as you dig out the gold chain that’s wrapped around his neck. 

The one that holds his ring, the one he told you about one night that keeps it safe whenever he’s training. 

“What if I want this?” Your voice is cracking, and you tug the chain tighter.

“What if I want all those things? What if I want you to love me?” The ring shines in the moonlight, mirroring her pair thats wrapped around your finger, “I want to be your friend,” you stress, your brows strewn together as tears overflow from your waterline, “And I want to know what things you like. I want to walk with you all around the earth and walk back home again. I want to sleep next to you. I want to make you laugh, and I want you to make me smile. I want you to be my husband so that I can be your wife,” you cry out, your chest heaving up and down as he wraps his arms around your back, pulling you into his lap as he tries to quickly wipe your tears away. 

“I want you too, Satoru,” you whisper, broken with your wet sniffles, a wet laugh escaping your lips when you see him crack at the way you said his name with so much care, your thumbs gliding across his cheeks. 

You slide closer into him, your legs splitting across his huge thighs as he hugs you tenderly to him, his head resting on your chest so that he can hear your heartbeat, make sure that this wasn’t just another dream.

“I don’t deserve you,” he murmurs against your bosom, looking up at you with glistening eyes. 

“Then fight for me,” you whisper, your hands on either side of his face, “Give me all those things. Give me more,” you smile when his arms wrap around your waist a little tighter, his hands holding you up, “And I’ll do the same.” 

He nods, holding your hand that was still holding onto his ring to his chest, one hand moving to your back, and in the mess of tears and broken laughs the two of you seem to move together, meeting each other in the middle as your lips find each other in the dark shadows of night. 

You gasp when his lips capture yours, and he moves towards the sound, wanting to hold it, keep it forever. 

Gojo moves slowly, knowing that this is your first time, and cups your jaw, helping you move along with him as you lips slot and lock against each other. It’s messy and with no order, your chin staining with sweat as you moan against him, feeling delirious without the touch of him. 

You know this isn’t the easiest position for him, but he doesn’t seem to mind. He groans against you, his eyes squeezing shut, trying to memorize your taste in case the world ended tomorrow and this was his last meal. 

“Is this-” You cut him off when you swoop in again, his laughter cut short by your needienss, the way you paw at his chest, your hands winding up to his hair as you tug harshly on the soft strands. 

He moans at this, at the way you grind mindlessly on his thigh, your need for each other bleeding out into the open. 

“I love you,” he murmurs against you, kissing down your chin and then back up to you, his tongue swiping against your lips, savroing your whine, “I love you so much,” he says to everybody, hoping even those on mountains oceans away could hear, “I love you, my wife,” and you giggle, eyes bright when you hear those words. 

“Say it again,” you ask, your nails drawing little shapes on his nape, and you see him break into a smile. 

“My wife,” he repeats with a peck to your cheek, “My beautiful wife,” he kisses the tip of your nose, smiling at the way it scrunhed up slightly, just the way he adored, “My wife,” he kisses your jaw, “My wife,” your giggling nonstop and he hopes to bottle up the sound and hear it on his deathbed.

His hands travel back down to your hips, adusjsting you slightly so that you wouldn’t feelt he embarrassing hardening of his dick just from kissing you, and moves his lips down to your neck, hearing the way there’s a hitch in your laughter. 

“Why’d you stop?” he nudges his nose at that spot pf your neck that still smells like lavender, his favroite scent in the world, “Hm?” Gojo hums against that spot, licking a wet stripe up it, sucking at the skin, feeling the way you arch into his chest. 

“Y-your reeking s-scent infiltrated my nose,” you murmur, biting on your lip as he pinches your waist. 

“Yeah?” Gojo continued to tease you, sliding the sleeve of your dress down, giving you more access to the skin of your collarbone, “Want me to stop?” 

“No!” You cry, totally against your better judgement, moaning when he sucks another mark into the skin, biting it, and then presses a soft kiss to it as an apology, “Please, please, don’t stop.” 

He chuckles darkly, shifting you around so that you are lying back down on the ground, his body framing yours as he continues tugging down your dress, going slow in case you ever wanted him to stop. 

His fingers are quick at untying the string that holds you bodice together, unravelingit all until it falls off and he’s greeted to the sight of your heaving chest, the way your naked breasts rise and fall. 

Gojo blinks for a moment, forgetting how to move. 

“W-what?” You ask, a little self-conscience as he continues to stare at your chest, “Do they look wonky?” You move your hands to cover up but a deep gutteral growl escapes his lips, pinning your hands back. 

“Beautiful,” he bites out, moving his head down, pressing a wet kiss in between the valley of your breasts, “You look like a fuckin’ statue,” he says, “You’re s-so beautiful.” Gojo repeats, and you can’t protest with the way he praises you, nor the way his lips hover over a nipple, finally leaning in fully as he sucks on it. 

“F-fuck!” You cry out at the sensation, your fingers lost in his hair as you keep him there, back arching off the ground, “That, that feels…good,” you can’t speak, not with the way his tongue slides across your nipple, pressing little kisses around you areola. 

His other hand goes to your other one, making sure she’s not feeling lonely, his thumb flicking over your sensitive nipples as you whine even louder. 

Gojo switches and you feel your breath shudder in an embarrassing whimper, your eeys squeezing shut when he bites at you, wanting to mark you up for those wretched gods to see and feel humanly jealous over. 

“So soft,” he murmurs against your skin, almost in awe, “feels like silk.” 

You would’ve had a witty joke about this, you know you did, but you can’t fathom to think about anything other than the way his lips feel on your tits, the way he seems like he’d die had he not been here sooner. 

But he then raises his head, and you whine in protest. Gojo almost break at the way you’re looking up at him, the way yor lips tremble from sheer desire. 

“Want more?” He presses, his hands, warmer than the fire that’s burning in your belly, trailing down, down to where your dress was slightly parting, “Here?” 

“Y-yes, fuck,” you moan, parting your legs to make room for him, not knowing what this feeling was but knowing that he was the only one who could soothe it, “Need it so bad Sa-satoru,” 

His eyes roll back, swallowing his primal groan at the way you plead for him, and nods, pressing a kiss against your stomach before his hitches the fabric upwards, sliding down your body so that his face is closer to that heat. 

You know you should feel more shame, but you feel like you’re going to die if your husband doesn’t do something soon. 

Gojo’s hand travels up your calf, trailing up your thigh, and suddenly stops. 

You go to beg, plead, for him, but cut yourself off when his lips find your inner thighs, pressign wet and messy kisses to them, getting dangerously close to where you felt like you were leaking. 

“You’re divine,” he whispers against your skin, hands wrapping around your thighs as he pulls them apart, “Fuckin’ divine.” 

His lips suddenly find there, you glistening cunt, and you mewl out for him. 

“Satoru,” your chest is heaving like you can’t find any air, “T-there, please, there,” and fuck the way you’re begging him is so sweet that he can’t find it in himself to tease you. 

His fingers seperate your wet lips, groaning when he sees just how much you’re dripping, and licks a tentative stripe upwards, your surprised gasp at how good it felt going straight to his cock.

Gojo carefully slides a finger through your tight walls, feeling the way you tighten around that, and lets his lips travel to your clit, pressing small kisses to it before he begins to suck. You clench around him, and your toes curl at the way he begins to pump it in and out, your essence soaking his skin. 

“So wet sweetheart,” he groans swapping his finger for his thumb at your clit, his tongue diving into your walls as he nearly cums from your saccharine taste alone, “S-shit, fuck, you taste like fucking heaven.” 

Your thighs tighten arund his head, but he craves the feeling, his tongue eating you out at such a fast pace that you begin to wonder if you need this more or him. 

“O-oh gods,” your grips his head tightly, can’t find the sympathy in yourself to feel bad, “‘Toru, oh, oh my, don’t stop! 

That coil in your stomach grows more taunt with each second. 

He alternates, adding in another thick finger, feeling the way you try to stretch for him. He glides in and out of you with ease, but he wonders what you’d look like on his thick cock, how you’d preen as he split you open with his girth. 

“Sweet,” he moans against you, his voice vibrating against your pulsing walls, “You’re so fuckin’ sweet.” 

You nod at something, whatever he just said, not fulling understanding anything around you as he continue to stimulate your clit, sucking on it, his teeth gliding across it with a little bite, and you moan out even louder. 

“I…” you can’t think, can’t breathe, “F-fcuk, ‘Toru, something, something’s happening,” you don’t know what this feeling is, this electric, all-consuming feeling that’s zapping through your body, making it numb yet aware of everything at the same time. 

“I know, I know,” Gojo praised you, one of his hands holding your stomach down, the added pressure making you whine, “You’re doing so good for me, you’re there, come on come for me,” his hand travels up your body, finding yours as he weaves your fingers together. 

“Shit, shit,” you mewl, “I’m coming, fuck, c-coming!” You cry out, your back arching off of the ground as your legs grow slack around his shoulders, your walls pulsing around him as that string tightens for the final time and then finally breaks. 

You can see white as your eyes rolls back into your head, squeezing his hand as tightly as you can, your yes dotting with tears. Your climax was all consuming, making you gush around his fingers and tongue, seeming to be never-ending, your body shaking in his hold. 

Gojo presses one final kiss to your cunt, licking off your release from his fingers, groaning at the taste, and lets you catch your breath. 

When you’re finally able to crack your eyes open, you peek them over to Gojo, seeing the way he tilts his head back, your cum still glistening on his chin and cheek, and whine out in embarrassment. 

“What?” He asks, eyes teasing when you go to hide your face in your hands. 

“I can’t,” your words are muffled, “I can’t believe I just…” 

Gojo kisses your forehead, wiping some of the tears from your eyes away as he kisses your brow bone. 

“How do you feel?” He asks, his eyes scanning over your body, glistening with sweat, and you take in a gulp of air. 

“Good,” you say finally with a soft smile, “Really good.” 

You look from his little grin, one that you peck at, your thumb rubbing up and down his jaw, and then look down, to the obvious bulge that’s hiding behind his training trousers. 

You’ve never seen a cock before but fuck he’s massive.

“What…” you trail off, sitting up slightly, and he helps balance you, “What about you?” you paw at his stomach, right before it leads down, and he lets out a shuddered whine. 

“As much as I-” he bites his tongue, feeling like he’s going to cum if you continue to look at him like that, “As much as I want to…not here,” he looks around at the field, shaking his head as a definite no, “Not here.” 

You go to protest, but he stops you, biting your fingers gently as you yelp, shoving his head away with little force as he chuckles. 

You let him wrap your dress around you again, tying some of the knots so that it doesn’t open up when you’re standing, and let the silence wash over the two of you calm your beating down heart down.

He plays with the ring around your finger, and you watch as the ring around his neck moves with his little breaths. 

“I want to sleep in your bed,” you say, and his blue eyes find yours. 

“You’re crazy if you don’t think I’m letting you sleep anywhere else,” he says in a shocked sort of way and you laugh, looking over to the side for a brief moment, and then look back at him. 

“Do you really love me?” 

Your words as whispered, but it feels like the wind picked them up and scattered them all around the field, around the river, the ancient stones, and right into Gojo’s heart. 

“I really love you,” he whispers back, kissing your eyelids, in between your brows, your forehead, the back of your hand, and murmurs the words, “my wife,” to nobody and to everybody at the same time. 

You smile, pulling him down by that necklace of his so that you can plant a soft kiss against his lips.  

[thecoiledserpent]

↻ DARAKARAKA PLANET AND THE NATURE OF THE SPOUSE

basics of vedic astrology. ask box. pinned.

the planet having the lowest degree among the seven planets—sun, moon, mercury, venus, mars, jupiter and saturn is your darakaraka (abbrev.—dk). it is the planet that represents the nature of your 'opposite', or your future spouse.

note that this also represents the traits that you yourself do not embody. the partner is a form of the cumulations of traits that we most often desire in ourselves, what we seek subconsciously.

you can also think of your darakaraka planet as what you desire to be. for example, someone with a mars dk may desire to be more outspoken, energetic and courageous. darakaraka is the last significator among the seven planets because your future spouse is your other half; or, alternatively, it is representative of the things that you lack.

i would like to highlight that simply the planet is not enough an indicator of your spouse. the nakshatra placement of said placement matters a lot, too.

say, a female native has purva ashada jupiter in 7h with magha venus dk in 3h. both jupiter and darakaraka are massive fs indicators. we notice that jupiter is in a venus ruled nak and the dk is venus as well, so the fs will for sure be venus dominant. additionally, dk planet in magha indicates the fs may have ketuvian influence to their personality / appearance. maybe a gaunt body, or magnetic eyes. their ancestors (pitris) would be respected and / or worshipped in their family tradition. they might have a kingly personality. jupiter in 7h further increases their venusian quality. so we study the fs using many combinations like these. now say this person's venus was in 3rd house aries in navamsa. the relationship will be sexually passionate, and the spouse could be of fiery demeanour. impatient, and demanding. they could be oblivious to the native's efforts a times, and this would hurt them. if say venus was also combust from sun, then there would be quarrels with the spouse. if venus was conjunct mars closely, then the native could be promiscuous leading to fights with the spouse. if venus was conjunct mercury, the fs could have a sibling.

so on, and so forth. i've tried my best to be as inclusive and detailed as possible; but know that these are general observations. your fs won't be a king just because it sounds like that. i speak by taking both, the worst and best case scenarios.

SUN DARAKARAKA

if you hope to expand your business, form connections or just overall want to improve your professional life, then sun darakaraka is a good indication that your spouse will help you in said endeavour. they will very likely be the dominant partner in the relationship, or at least be responsible for the more practical side of the relationship.

the spouse is a resemblance of the native's outward nature. it is not the best thing to have sun or moon as dk since there are ego issues involved in these placements. the spouse is a reflection of who the native is internally or externally, and their negative traits could trigger the native. while transformation is a good thing, in a married couple it can lead to resentment. i personally believe that with a sun or moon dk it is advisable to cultivate patience. understanding yourself is key to understanding the spouse.

they are nurturing but may turn controlling. it would be good to take some time away from them and spend it on yourself to ensure you don't completely give in to everything they say and lose your personality. also, to be fair, they don't appreciate dependent or weak people. so if you lose your sense of personality around them, then you might end up loosing your romantic appeal in their eyes. make them realise that they're not the only thing in your life and their respect for you will always remain high.

the relationship here can easily turn egoistical, so it is advisable to ensure that the spouse does not turn too distant. they can take impulsive decisions at times, so keep an eye on them discreetly (because they will not appreciate it if they catch you, either). just look out for them, i mean. with a sun dk, the spouse may have a broad face and traditionally masculine appearance. wide shoulders, or long legs. strong arms and thigh region. there could be stress around their eyes or neck region, and they could often overwork themselves.

the spouse would appreciate being looked after. simple gestures aren't enough to win their heart, but they never go unnoticed. it affirms them and encourages them to look after their spouse, so they will return the favour in the form of actions and taking more responsibility off your shoulders. ( i was kind of hesitating in saying this but here we go; sun dk may indicate a spouse who likes a tease😉 yk, the usual; decorating the bedroom with flowers / candles / whatever aesthetic they appreciate and wearing smth sexy gets them going 😏 they are genuinely hard working though, so they find themselves both physically and emotionally fulfilled when presented with such gestures. ) they may not act romantic all the time, because their way of expressing love is by taking as much burden off their spouse's shoulders as possible.

MOON DARAKARAKA

a moon dk makes the native less emotional by nature and their spouse is more emotional than them. the spouse is usually beautiful, or at least has rounder features. for those who seek women partners, moon dk bestows fertility, beauty and fine speech. for those seek male partners, moon dk bestows wit, round features, medium to short stature, and the ability to lie and manipulate.

lunar energy is better handled by women; and in men, lunar energy is only nurtured properly if the moon is in good dignity or the native also has leo placements. moon in detriment for lunar male native will make him apathetic to the plight of women and he may also be corrupt by nature. regardless, a mood dk will not be very beneficial if moon is overall weak or a malefic in the chart. the spouse would be emotionally unstable or have mental disorders in the worst case.

with a moon dk, your spouse would light up your domestic life. because the native would not be much interested in the home and hearth themselves (especially if they don't have cancer or taurus placements), the spouse will look after most of the organization of the house. yes, this can bestow a selfish character to the native. but not mandatorily, of course. the native would like seeing the home clean but may not contribute much to it. that, or the spouse would rather look over the house of their own accord.

the spouse would be intensely passionate about their career. whatever they do to make an earning, it will be almost religious to them. work is like duty to them. they worship it, and they respect money and labour. they may overwork themselves to stay true to their selves to the point of developing eating disorders or losing physical charm. (lose physical charm in the sense that they may suddenly lose a lot of weight and our body fat, rolls and curves are a part of our auspiciousness and beauty.)

the domestic life would be pleasurable and the in-laws are usually quite happy when the native having moon dk has a female partner. she will be of gentle nature, and also be sexually, uh, hungry? lenient? demanding? somehow, a mix of all three. she will desire sex, and she will be lustful and she may even chase after others after wedlock if the dk moon is aspected by mars or venus. hence why moon can give mixed results. in the best case scenario she would be chaste, highly ambitious about her career, caring, impressive and melancholic.

the spouse is a resemblance of the native's internal nature. it is not the best thing to have sun or moon as dk since there are ego issues involved in these placements. the spouse is a reflection of who the native is internally or externally, and their negative traits could trigger the native. while transformation is a good thing, in a married couple it can lead to resentment. i personally believe that with a sun or moon dk it is advisable to cultivate patience. understanding yourself is key to understanding the spouse.

be patient with a female spouse. she will be emotionally vulnerable and gentle hearted. her mood swings will be irrational and intolerable at times, and it is advisable to simply let her be by herself to calm down for a while. be cautious with a male spouse. he may be disloyal and seek other partners even after wedlock. he may especially have such tendencies if his own venus is conjunct mars. he would be even more prone to showing such behaviour when upset, so don't just let him storm off. a nice meal or a forceful hug almost always has these people listening. also, don't break their trust; they completely lose respect for your words and promises after that.

MERCURY DARAKARAKA

an ideal darakaraka if you're looking for a spouse who will also be your partner-in-crime, as well as closest confidant. the spouse will be as much a friend as a partner, and themes of light-heartedness will be apparent. they may appear air-headed, but their appearance is not one to go by; especially those who are seeking to have a female partner.

the spouse would be clever, with a lot of connections and a good social life. if they want to, they can pull strings to get their work done. they enjoy the leisure of life and may have hedonistic tendencies. regardless, they are clever and diplomatic. they know what to say, and what not to. even their silence has meaning. anger manifests as abandonment with them, so if you're not observant enough, you may end up chasing them away further when they are upset. they are less emotional and adopt rationality in most situations.

they would be charming, with attractive facial features. they may be medium to tall in height or skinny. their face could be symmetric in a unique way. as in, moles on exact opposite sides of the face, or a completely symmetric hairline. regardless, they will be very finicky about their appearance and would require reassurance from their spouse (you). they could be a lover of flowery scents or wooden undertones. if natal mercury is in water sign then they could adore the smell of wet earth. if natal mercury is in ketu nakshatras, then they could be childish and innocently oblivious in matters of the heart.

they may seek company just as a child does, and can be childish. they may test others' patience sometimes. they may accidentally upset their mother-in-law, which may lead to fights with the spouse. they may love being chased in the relationship. they would be forever young, and be appreciated for their liveliness even in old age. they are a trickster, and would have tendencies to manipulate others if dk mercury is also in mercury nakshatras or natal mercury is in 7th/8th house.

if mercury becomes dk while forming mahapurusha yoga, the spouse would be endowed with fine speech, a quick mind, ability to make money and manage it well. they would be bright of mind and likeable. they would almost have a childish charm that attracts people to them, allowing them many opportunities in life. they would have a pleasant disposition and be fond of laughter. they could also like sweet meats or chocolate.

VENUS DARAKARAKA

a genuinely good darakaraka placement to have. if darakaraka venus is in leo, the native will respect women a lot. if dk leo venus is in the 2nd or 3rd house, native may be oral about their activism for women empowerment.

for venus dk, the married life will be pleasurable. the spouse will be attractive, charming, have pleasing aesthetics and pay attention to cleanliness. they often pay good attention to their spouse (the native themselves, that is) and are romantic. they may appreciate gestures that express love, however big or small they may be. although they could be vain, or even prideful in the worst of cases. if venus is weak in the chart, then there will be struggles in the married life. there could be arguments, and problems in conceiving.

the spouse will be what the native desires in a partner. they will have ideal characteristics a wife may desire of her husband, although he / she may not make a good parent. it is important not to ignore the children in favour of the spouse. the native having venus dk will be the more prominent parent in the child's life. the home and hearth will be comforting places for the couple, and the home will be beautifully decorated. they will go on vacations often, too.

the spouse will resemble the ideal beauty of their gender / race / nationality etc. they may even have an auspicious appearance; as in, soft pink feet, heart shaped face, curly hair, lotus shaped birth mark, moles on the face for women etc.

venus in the dharma trikona: the spouse will be knowledgeable and fair. they will value justice as a part of society and may dislike selfishness or displays of lack of dignity or grace. they will be well guided in life and guide their spouse towards greater heights as well. the native will respect their spouse a lot. the married life will be divinely protected and the couple will share many successes, gain prosperity and receive luxuries. if the venus is weak while in the dharma trikona, the spouse may be morally corrupt. the spouse would be more self centered and may even ignore their children in favour of the native. venus in the artha trikona: a favourable placement to have if the native is involved in business or is career focused and wishes to climb the stairs of material success. the spouse will support this pursuit both in terms of connections and their own, personal effort towards encouraging the native and helping them with technicalities. there will be no lack of material wealth. dk venus in 6th house will make the couple devoted to each other and they would not engage in promiscuity. even more favourable if the native is a libra rising. the couple will donate a lot, and will gain name and fame for their generosity. if venus is unfavourable in the chart, the spouse will be greedy for money, fame and power. they would have no problem manipulating the native and the couple will share mistrust. the native may end up resenting the spouse. money will be abundant, but it will be spent for one reason or the other as soon as it comes into the house. venus in the kama trikona: luxury, a large, beautiful and envy-inspiring home, gifts from the spouse and the like themes are associated here. a personal blessing from the gods if venus also receives aspects from saturn or jupiter. even jupiter's gaze falling on venus is highly auspicious. money will be spent easily and in abundance, but it will also come in the house quickly. if saturn aspects venus, the spouse will appreciate budgeting. just an overall great placement to have, the spouse is intensely romantic for this placement. if venus is unfavourable in the chart, the spouse could be finicky and stingy; but only towards the native. the native will not enjoy their position as the spouse. the native will feel unloved because of the lack of action and initiative in their romantic ventures from their spouse. the spouse may try to make up for it with sweet words, but it will not satisfy the native. venus in the moksha trikona: a highly favourable placement if you wish to pursue spirituality, or work towards occult sciences after marriage. the spouse will be spiritually inclined and the relation between the couple will be emotionally rich. truly magical, it reminds me of that one hindi movie wherein a kashmiri couple are displaced from their home due to terrorist activities and have to live as refugees in the outskirts of delhi and punjab. they struggle a lot, but the love between them only deepens the further life tests their bond. suffice to say that there will be struggles when the princely venus is thrown into the mud of struggles of common life, but it is only under these circumstances that a lotus blooms. concluding, i wish to say that this placement is not as dreamy as the others, but the spouse is very supporting, kind and encourages the native to attain moksha. the spouse will believe in spirituality and gods grace will be upon this couple if jupiter, saturn or sun aspect venus. with aspects from sun, ensure venus is not combust, otherwise quarrels will be there in the relationship. an unfavourable venus in these houses will reap the opposite results. the spouse can be materialistic. they could show hedonistic tendencies and be unemotional. lack of understanding within the relationship, and worst case scenario, the spouse may cheat on the native. it is advisable to chant sri suktam as often as possible in a divine, quaint and clean setting. keep the bedroom clean, and avoid letting too many people into your sleeping chambers.

venus while being dk if forms a mahapurusha yoga gives a highly knowledgeable spouse who would be interested in occult sciences and have great desire to master the vedas. they would be of beautiful physique and very likely rich. they would form a lot of connections and the women in their life would be highly supportive of them. they would be sensual and romantic. as a parent they would teach their child to respect women foremost, and would set an amazing example of an ideal man / woman by treating their spouse with love and respect. their child would love them a lot. they could be of kingly / royal background.

i won't be able to make a generalization for other dks other than venus since i was unable to generalize in the others. venus mostly gave the same results, though.

MARS DARAKARAKA

the soul desires a passionate, long lasting love. with a mars darakaraka, other than having a fun, spontaneous and adventurous spouse, the native may also desire wanting to be liberated from societal expectations. go wild, so to say. maybe they limit themselves too much, but mars dk people actually suffer from their rich desires in life that are sometimes even impossible. but other times maybe they just desire dancing in the rain, hanging off a moving car, go scuba diving, etc.

mars dk bestows in the native an intense desire to love, and be loved. these are passionate people and once they decide that they love you, they will look out for you in whatever way they can or you let them. it's not easy for their love to die. mars dk natives lust for intensity, and they prove it. it's really ride or die with these people, they are genuinely obsessive to the point of their own ruin. remember that it's important to remain self loving too, no matter how much you love someone. at the end of the day you're the only one who will love you.

now, the spouse of the mars dk native is often sexually attractive or strong looking. and i mean both in terms of personality and looks, or either even. maybe they look like they could punch you, or just very argumentative, they come off as being strong either way. they have a reddish undertone to their skin and may even have acne. they could have scars on their face or body, and appear experienced with struggles in life. although they aren't, not as much as saturn dk native's spouses anyway.

the spouse would be active, sporty and bright. they could be im jobs that have them running around all day, even a lot of travelling is possible. government jobs that often have them transferring from this place to that. they may even be an engineer if natal mars dk forms contact with saturn. it is preferable that saturn make indirect contact such as via sign exchange, house exchange, or drishti instead of direct conjunction since that will bring struggles into the native's life.

mars dk gives a spouse who is hot tempered and easily loses their patience. they would be tyrannical if mars is combust, and the relationship would suffer a lot due to this. if mars is conjunct venus, then the spouse would be loyal, beautiful and sexually passionate but the native themselves may be of loose morals or character. it is advisable not to keep a toe out of line when in a relationship with a mars dominant person since much like solar people, the relationship runs on two things; namely love and respect. if the respect is lost, the relationship turns bitter and there will be many fights.

the spouse would be appreciative of the native's efforts in life and the native would feel seen with their spouse. they would live a happy life together if jupiter comes into contact with mars. the couple would be blessed with virtuous progeny and all sorts of luxuries in such a case.

mars forming a mahapurusha yoga while being dk would bring a spouse who is virtuous, passionate, fierce, fights for their rights, unafraid of challenges, of reddish skin, having strength in the arms and have sturdy feet and body. this would give excellent results, as well. they would make a good parent, but they may unintentionally transfer their own prejudices / ideas to their children without giving them the space to grow. they would need to work on this. but they would make an amazing spouse who would always stand by your side, even in the most adverse of conditions.

JUPITER DARAKARAKA

the spouse is, by extension, one's teacher when jupiter becomes the darakaraka. the partner will be religious / spiritual, benevolent, wealthy, optimistic, fair and of curvaceous physique. emotionally, they will be private but have a rich inner world. they spend a lot of time cultivating their knowledge and inner world and hence are selective about the crowd they mingle with. but they are still polite and find suitable worth even in the smallest of events or people. they would also love the arts.

the spouse will be money minded. they could prioritize themselves a lot, and could put off an egoistic or sensitive native. it needs to be noted that while they are kind and benevolent, they give worth to their hard work and don't let it go to waste. they utilise connections and place importance in human connections. still, a jupiter dk can give a somewhat distant spouse, emotionally. they will recognize and execute their duties in the house accordingly, and not do anything less or more. they will teach their child good values and would make for good role models.

by extension, i must mention that while this is extremely rare (unfortunately, because most men are entitled pricks who not only learn to disrespect women from their fathers but are also often protected unfairly by their mothers who should, as women themselves, correct them but don't), jupiter darakaraka can bestow the 'ideal' husband who worships his wife. or, the 'ideal' wife who remains devoted and loving to her husband. and not in a leech-like obsessive way, but rather in the way common imagination narrates it.

guidance towards the best ideals, romantic ventures, completely loyalty to the wife / husband, caring and kind, however you envision it. especially true for natives who seek a female partner, since jupiter dominance in female natives usually bestows a virtuous and pleasant personality. of course, a lot of aspects matter here. like a retrograde jupiter will destroy this; or a weak or debilitated jupiter. even jupiter in eighth reduces the auspiciousness of this planet.

darakaraka jupiter mostly bestows good results. it is especially beneficial for the native to inculcate habits of the ministerial jupiter who is of sattwa guna (of auspicious nature), wise, patient and the teacher of all. jupiter is also directly linked with shri hari vishnu, so for hindus, it is advisable to hold fasts on thursday or ekadashi (the 11th day of every month in the hindu calendar) to be under his grace. the grace of shri vishnu is said to save man from the worst depths of hell, and rise from common greed and sin.

wearing gold and yellow hued clothes increases the auspiciousness of one's jupiter.

jupiter forming mahapurusha yoga while being the dk is highly favourable for the native's spiritual life; bestowing a spiritually inclined spouse who would be prosperous and wealthy. they would have a lot of in depth knowledge about various topics of interest and they would love teaching to others. they would be kind to those who wish to learn from them and make for an excellent parent and role model. their child would both fear them and respect them. the child would be closer to the native than the spouse, emotionally. they would also make an excellent and pleasant spouse.

SATURN DARAKARAKA

the spouse is diligent of nature and polite by virtue. they might be the epitome of raising one's own empire; not quite literally, of course. but they will be self made. they are protected by saturn; treating them unfairly will have consequences. if someone manages to achieve something with 2 hours of work, it might take them 6 hours. there remains a theme of struggle with the spouse's life, but they will know how to emerge from tough situations. they would value tradition, culture and religion a lot. they could make their father figure in their life their role model, and end up becoming an even better person than them.

spouse may have dark hair and sunken, tired looking eyes. hooded eyes. tall and lean appearance, regardless of height. they may appear tired all the time, or obvious indicators on their face that they work a lot. mature looking, looks older than their age. usually have long, bony fingers. they might have a strong bone structure in their face. they could be very beautiful if saturn is aspected by jupiter or venus. if not, then they would have a structured face regardless.

the spouse may have uncordial relations with their father, and would be more unconventional by thought. they won't bind themselves with useless restrictions. it might be difficult to understand them, especially emotionally as they might be very reserved in terms of expressions. they will be less romantic and will be more focused on career and the more practical aspects of the relationship over other themes. (this does not mean they will not be romantic, they are just more grounded than the others. they are not lovers of romance like the venus dks or complete workaholics like solar dks. they simply value longevity, is all. lack of structure will put them off and they would rather sort it out first.)

is saturn is conjunct venus, or jupiter, then the spouse's love would stand the test of time. if natal saturn is in 7th house they would like being taken care of in terms of service; as in preparing them a bath, taking care of their study room, washing their hair, managing money or other practical affairs in their stead. they would love you regardless, but they would respect you a lot if you do so.

if natal saturn is in 1st house then they would love giving the same treatment to the native, or at least it would be beneficial for them to. if, however, saturn is also in cap / aqua while in the 1st house, then dk saturn will give adverse results and the good qualities of the spouse would be destroyed. they may even be lazy and dull. however aries saturn in 1st house will give good results, but there will be fights and periods of isolation between the couple.

saturn forming a mahapurusha yoga while being dk would give a spouse who might as well be a millionaire, or have the potential of becoming one. they would be hard-working, respectful and of amazing morality and character. while not everybody would adore them, everyone would certainly respect them. they would be slow, but dedicated and deliberate. they would be very attractive of physique, and if natal mars is conjunct jupiter in the spouse's chart, then they may.. er, be sexually strong. an amazing placement to have! they would teach their child the importance of hard work and diligence and their child would respect them, even though they may not end up being emotionally attached to them.

since we were on the topic of spouses, i wanted to address one major thing which often bothers a lot of people. when we talk about these planets, signs, houses, aspects, etc then we mention a lot of good and bad. we discuss what would be good about the relationship and what would be bad. for venus and jupiter dk i particularly highlighted money, fame and riches. but do all natives having these dk have loving spouses? this is why at the end of the day, it all circles back to karma. which responsibility you ran from in your previous lives, what sins you committed, which people you betrayed, how you betrayed them, etc. if there's one thing that will never leave you then that is the result of your own actions. i know, and i never say that trauma, fear, abuse are things that you deserved because of your bad karma; that was someone else who absolutely ruined their own soul and mind by trying to hurt yours. what karma is, however, the people who could save you but who you never had. trustworthy parents. caring spouse. loving siblings. reliable friends. other souls who care about your soul; and when you don't have them in your life, is when you realize that you have committed wrongs against others. maybe you were the aggressor in some other life. maybe you were a german who secretly revealed a jewish neighbour to the nazis. maybe you were the man who abandoned his wife for his career. maybe you were the child who left their old parents on the streets. maybe you were the child who suicided and left their parents to mourn. maybe you were the sibling in whose favour your parents forcefully married off their more than capable daughter. maybe you were the 14 year old boy who raped a girl; a girl who could have been the next genius but suicided because of you and you never knew. you could be the mother who abandoned her child to marry a richer man. you cold be the father who never loved his girl child so the child never knew what true love was and kept getting manipulated by other men. you could be the co worker due to whom a talented young lady lost her ambition. maybe, maybe, maybe. you will receive punishment for your wrong doings, but even the universe is a form of parent to us. it will not break you to the point of no return, and in every darkness you will find a beacon of light. a pet, maybe. good food, nice friends, random strangers who are kind to you, a sparrows song, a flower's scent; these are all blessings, and it is with exposing ourselves to the truth that we learn and develop as people. the reason i say this is because people have high expectations of their partners, but they could be the worst sort of person in your eyes. and that's okay. at the end of the day you can only carry out your own duty. even wanting to see or understand the fruit of your dutiful nature is a worthless pursuit. please don't be disheartened, we all have our own struggles in life. and in some way, we can all, together help each other to deal with our problems with a kind smile :)

ॐ नमो भगवते वासुदेवाय नमः

[genderqueerdykes]

my heart goes out to every bisexual who gets told they're "just straight" or "just gay". my heart goes out to every bisexual who gets told bisexuality isn't real. my heart goes out to every bisexual who has to pick between being viewed as all gay or all straight. my heart goes out to every bisexual who has to present as gay in order to be seen as queer. my heart goes out to every bisexual gay and every bisexual lesbian who gets told their identity isn't real. my heart goes out to every trans bisexual who has their orientation invalidated because they are trans. my heart goes out to every bisexual who is demonized for being sexually active for one reason or another.

my heart goes out to every closeted bisexual. my heart goes out to every bisexual who can't come out. my heart goes out to every aro and ace bisexual who get harassed by those around them for being sexually promiscuous because of their bisexuality when they don't have sex or partners. my heart goes out to every bisexual who ever has their bisexuality called into question. my heart goes out to every bisexual who gets told to not show up to pride or queer support groups because they're "in a heterosexual relationship." my heart goes out to every bisexual who views all of their modes of attraction as queer and those around them do not respect that.

my heart goes out to every bisexual. it is a challenge to be seen correctly as bi, and to not be harassed, mocked, or belittled for it. i see you for who you are- you are allowed to define your bisexuality. someone refusing to see you as bi doesn't mean you're not. you shouldn't have to prove your bisexuality or perform it for anyone. it's not up for debate. i hope things get a bit easier for you soon. you are bisexual no matter what anyone else says

[icanseethefuture333]

Asteroid Kitty (9563): your kitten like charm 🐈‍⬛

Asteroid kitty represents the duality of a person, it’s how people are seen as sexy and cute. Asteroid kitty can also show how mischievous or promiscuous a person can be towards their prey, especially when it comes to women using their feminine charm to get what they want.

“I’m the type of girl you wanna chew all of my bubblegum

I’m the type of girl you wanna take to ya mama house”

Kitty in the signs/houses:

Aries Kitty / in the 1st house

Aries Kitty / in the 1st house people are the embodiment of “cat pretty”, their eyes are often shaped like a feline’s, and they are I nown for being a leader. They don’t like to follow the rules and could be seen as rebellious by people. Kitty 1st housers may also hate having people in their personal space but could lack a sense of respect for others. When in a relationship, they see what belongs to their partner’s as theirs, and wouldn’t understand why they don’t want to share. They could also be drawn to cats and animals prints in general. These kittens like to play hard to get and enjoy playful pushing/smacking on the arm as a form of flirtation. If they were a cat, they would believe they are the master and their owner was their servant, similar to those wirehair cats. They are only affectionate with the people they care about and can look at you as if you’re crazy if you act like you know them. These kittens have an infectious laughter as well and their voice sounds like purring to the ears. They are also athletic and look damn good in their workout clothes. They can pick up dudes at the gym and they often find people trying to help them whenever they are lifting weights.

Taurus Kitty/in the 2nd house

Taurus Kitty / in the 2nd house people prioritize financial security and success over the approval of others. These kittens value comfort and stability, they could often take naps and be seen as “lazy”. They might also carry weight more than others or have a “fat cat” 👀. Taurus Kitty 2nd housers charm is their ability to make their home and their style fancy on a budget. If they were a cat, they’d be the fluffy white Persian ones with the diamond collar. These kittens love luxury and being pampered. These are the type of people who grew up spoiled by their family. In a relationship, they are the type to be given money for spa days and so they can get their claws sharpened. They are also stubborn when it comes to arguments but for others their temper can be seen as sexually enticing. Romantic suitors feel compelled to give them their money and assets. Touch is also a big turn on for them and being touched by them always feels so sensual. They are high maintenance and lack patience when it comes to other people’s ignorance.

Gemini Kitty / in the 3rd house

Ohhh what chatterboxes! These kittens are very vocal and outspoken, but their way of communicating is very endearing! The way Gemini Kitty / in the 3rd house people talk is so adorable, when they have a crush on someone they can be very cheeky, and like to play a game of “cat and mouse” with their romantic interest. If they were a cat, they’d be a Siamese cat 🗣️! They are also very observant and attentive to details, if you do something that they don’t like, then they get the ick immediately. They are also very hot and cold, they hate when people are constantly in their face and need to have their alone time. Gemini Kitty 3rd housers need mental stimulation and have to be intellectually engaged. They are bold when it comes to saying dirty things and can be very vocal in the bedroom.

Cancer Kitty / in the 4th house

Cancer Kitty / in the 4th house people are attuned to people’s emotions and are sensitive to their surroundings. They could be described as empathetic and homebodies. People see them as cute and loving, they could often be babied by people, even as they get older in age. These kittens are classy in the streets and a freak in the sheets, they could play a more submissive role in the bedroom. Cancer Kitty 4th housers are known for their glowing skin, sweet scent, and docile nature. They like to be nurturing towards their loved ones and may cry with them when upset. If they were a cat, they’d be a exotic shorthair 🧸. They are viewed as the girl/boy next door and some people dream of marrying them. People hate seeing them sad and would do anything to make them happy again, they could manipulate others’ emotions if they wanted and whenever they’re in trouble, they get away with it because of their innocent demeanor.

Leo Kitty in the 5th house

The definition of mischief! Leo Kitty 5th house people are playful and vivacious, they love to have fun! You can find them at a party dancing or playing video games on a Saturday night. These are the kittens that enjoy laser tag, they like anything bright and shiny. If they were a cat, they would be an orange cat 🐈 ! People could find their energetic personality uplifting and are appreciative of their positive attitude. They are optimistic when it comes to their goals and they believe in having a team spirit. Leo Kitty 5th housers could be loved by children and animals, they see them as a big kid as well. They might be the youngest of their family or was that child who was a “busy body”, always wanting to go outside. When in a relationship, they love physical touch and quality time, they just won’t get off their partners lol. They could also have a high sex drive and are always excited to try something new, they might even want to try something silly like spanking their partner’s butt when they are caught off guard.

Kitty in Virgo/6th house

Virgo / Kitty in the 6th house people require more care than others. They could often be prone to sickness and when they are feeling under the weather, people wish to tend to their every need. Self care is an important part of their daily routine, so you can catch them doing their yoga routine or doing skincare. They could also be allergic to pets as well even though they might want one to keep them company. Virgo / Kitty 6th housers can be quite critical to cheap materials and are picky to certain foods, they have a refined palette. If they were a cat, they’d be a Russian blue. Hygiene is important to them and they are often praised for their well kept appearance (“pussy tight pussy clean pussy fresh”). When in a relationship, they are more shy and prefer to show their love through acts of services. In order to feel comfortable sexually, they could need lots of foreplay and require a partner that has patience, it takes a while for these people to get in the mood. Lying on the green grass underneath the warm sun could be healing for these kittens. Being in nature allows them to unwind and release stress.

Libra Kitty / in the 7th house

Popular and pretty! Libra Kitty / In the 7th house people are admired by their peers and often attract attention without even trying. They have many romantic suitors and they like getting what they want. People could often be jealous of them because of how well liked they are. They could have a reputation of being a “home wrecker” but they don’t see it that way. They feel if the home was never secure in the first place, then it wasn’t their fault someone chased after them lol. Libra Kitty 7th housers can be superficial and most of their attraction is based on physical appearance. These kittens also value balance and have a steady workload. If they were a cat, they’d be a ragdoll. In the bedroom, they are likely to be a switch and enjoy giving and receiving. These people like to see their partner’s face so missionary or cowgirl would be their favorite position, as well as 69 for fairness.

Scorpio Kitty / in the 8th house

What mysterious little creatures. Scorpio Kitty / In the 8th house could prefer to be alone and dislike being forced to socialize. These kittens are often misunderstood by others and might have been outcasted in their youth. They go wherever they please and look good doing it. Scorpio Kitty 8th housers may be drawn to the dark and prefer taking walks out at night, they also wear a lot of black. If they were a cat, they’d be a Bombay cat 🐈‍⬛. When they are attracted to someone, they ooze sensuality and are very alluring without even trying, their mannerisms as well are attractive to people. These people could have supernatural experiences and might be highly intuitive as well. In their family dynamics, they could be protective of others and can sense danger before it happens. In the bedroom, they are flexible and able to place themselves in all types of positions. They enjoy the darker aspects of foreplay such as roughhousing, shibari, whips, and bdsm. Their goal during sex is to claim their partner as theirs, expect love bites and scratch marks from these felines.

Sagittarius Kitty / In the 9th house

These are the alley cats who have seen and experienced a lot of things. Sagittarius Kitty / in the 9th house people are wise and knowledge of various topics. To other people they could consider them a “know it all” and mature beyond their years, they might feel inferior to them when engaging in a conversation. These people enjoy adventure and freedom, they would be a stray cat that is known and loved by all in their neighborhood. These kittens would most likely have multiple homes and don’t like being tied down to one place. They enjoy a good sense of humor and are attracted to someone who is intelligent, when a person matches their energy that turns them on even more. In the bedroom, they like to are open to new experiences and wish to try different things, so they are likely to mess around with sex toys. Sagittarius Kitty 9th housers could value their education as well and may be a “teacher’s pet”. If they were a cat, they’d be a Bengal cat. Within their family, these people would be the carefree older sibling who has crazy stories of parties and drinking, they are mostly likely to remain single and would not want to get married. They spend their time traveling and enjoying different cuisines.

Capricorn Kitty / In the 10th house

Capricorn Kitty / in the 10th house are focused , responsible, and determined. They have a sharp wit and don’t tolerate nonsense. These kittens are often annoyed with people’s incompetence and it puts them in a bad mood when things are not handled properly. They admire individuals with a good work ethic and have a good head on their shoulder. It’s a major turn on for them when a partner is able to take the role of a provider and make them feel secure in a relationship. These kittens are the type to receive push presents and don’t accept anything less than they are worth. They prefer stability and assets over romantic infatuation. Capricorn Kitty / 10th housers are likely to be “trophy wives” and “wags” (wives and girlfriends of athletes). In the bedroom, they assert their dominance only as a form of punishment or a way to relieve stress. In general, they can be a brat and desire a partner that can tame them. They are very opinionated and will let you know if the sex was bad or not. Their style consists of expensive jewelry and casual business attire. If they were a cat, they’d be an Egyptian Mau.

Aquarius Kitty / In the 11th house

Aquarius Kitty / In the 11th house people catch on quickly to things and have a keen intellect. They are smart when it comes to technology and could have a solid social media following. Their pets would also be popular on social media or they could make money from them (E.G: placing them in pageants or competitions). They do well in modeling campaigns and could have been seen in commercials and catalogs. Their sense of fashion is unique and they could be referred to as a “trendsetter”. Aquarius Kitty / 11th housers are able to find sexual and romantic partners quite easily thanks to dating apps or having good luck when it comes to sliding in people’s DMs. They also enjoy cybersex, either on FaceTime or sending sexy texts to their crush. Their online presence is considered tempting and alluring. They could post pictures of themselves in risqué positions or thirst traps are often their go to on their story. I wouldn’t be surprised if they make money from having an OnlyFans as well. When it comes to relationships, they are most likely to prefer being single and value their freedom. The downside is people try to trap these kittens and try to turn them into a housewife (or spouse) when they know they are very independent and rebellious.

Pisces Kitty / In the 12th house

What gentle beings. Pisces Kitty / In The 12th house people have a healing presence and are in tuned with their senses. They could have a spiritual connection to cats and often receive signs from them. They are highly intuitive and have cat like reflexes, they can predict things before it even comes true. If they were a cat, they’d be a blue abyssian. They enjoy reading books, meditation, and anything that allows them a peace of mind. Pisces Kitty / 12th housers are likely to smoke weed or use some type of psychedelics. These are girls at Coachella that dress whimsical and colorful and just there to vibe and have a good time. These kittens believe in manifestation and are the type to leave crystals in their crush’s car/home. They believe they can seduce people with their mind and aura (which is honestly true). In the bedroom, they prefer to use as sex as an act of healing and creating a spiritual bond. They could also be in non traditional relationships and may be open to polyamorous relationships. They might have even had sex with more than one person at a time.

[esthercore]

Thinking of older Fatui men with a young, promiscuous and insatiable lover (Genshin Edition) 18+

Featuring: Dottore, Pantalone, Capitano, Pierro

Cw: Dumbification. free use, exhibitionism, cock warming, tiny body worshipping, pet play, throat training, dacraphyllia

★ ⋮ Dottore ⸝⸝

Is somebody gonna match my freak? No, cause he's ten times worse then whatever the fuck you are.

On the counter, on his table, in his lab, in front whatever abominations he's working on, in the Sumerian Forest to relive his younger years and traumatizing all the aranara, yes sir, you two being fucking 24/7, you wanna be a needy little bitch, my my, he would love to indulge.

Now, he can't exactly just stop his work but that doesn't mean you gotta stop, just lap his balls like a good lil pup, and warm it while he work. And don't you dare try to retreat when somebody walks in his lab, nuh uh, you gotta do your job like a good baby, and focus on him and his cock.

Big on dumbification too, you wanna be little whore and give him those fuck me eyes 24/7? You wanna be a shameless slut humping on his leg when he's working cause you just need it so bad?

Silly thing, you are just asking for trouble aren't ya, getting the big scary doctor addicted to your insatiablilty, unable to focus on his work without his baby pleasing.

God how much he hate when you are doing something else than focus solely on him, and he equally hate when his darling is sad, but he is at the end of the day Dottore, so of course he won't deal with his worries normally.

So, hitting to birds with one stone, he will make sure one way or other to make you his personal fleshlight, constantly pleasuring him and since no thoughts except cock, no sad darling.

Though the jerk sometimes will deny you pleasure or outright attention if he wants in the mood to spice things up. Will lick stains you tears after you fall asleep after crying.

Oh, and despite all the agents in his faction being uncomfortable with the blatant shamelessness of their Boss, and the struggle they go through to not catch a glance of naked you in between his legs, cause that would just lead to their beheading, at least they are grateful that you being there makes him at least a bit rational.

★ ⋮ Pantalone ⸝⸝

Oh he digs it, definitely the type keep you as his sugar baby, his pretty eye candy he likes to stay on his lap during his meetings. Dressing you up in the prettiest jewels and the softest fabrics, his sweet sweet status symbol.

Loves just being with you 24/7, you make up as a fine entertainment, having you hanging around his arm, groping you in front of whoever's talking to him, shamelessly if they are someone below in rank or discreetly if he respect the other person in front of him. But never showing much of your skin, although he loves to show off his darling, their precious body is only for him to savor.

And also the type to not mind if you have a promiscuous reputation, finds it cute even, you are a trained and experienced one, so that just means better quality, might even tease you about, if he can get a good reaction.

But, that doesn't mean he likes when someone else, especially your ex hook ups point it out, especially if you don't like that. The business smile on his face will remain the same except he will have that anime villain black aura around him, that make the latter super uncomfortable. Don't sweat your pretty head if you later found that person wailing in the northern bank, just focus on your lover.

Big on cock warming too, except instead of oral like Dottore he likes to use your warm holes. Not a big fan on keeping you on the floor, kneeling in front of him, you are his treasure, you deserve to be in equal standing. Sometimes during his break he like to lift you to his table, and pleasure you orally, savoring your taste for a good while, as a thank you for keeping him company.

★ ⋮ Capitano ⸝⸝

For the captain it's just another one of your cute traits, his needy little lover he likes to take everywhere. Now especially a much younger lover will make Capitano extra protective of them, hence being the only one who will find your insatiably a bit worrisome, especially concerned with how much he could indulge due to being extremely well endowed down below.

Now unlike the other three, his work is out in the battle fields, and heavy expeditions, and normally he would prefer to keep you tucked in Snezhnaya, but insatiable darling is a special case, where he can't just leave them alone with no one to pleasure which means, he just have you travel with him, wherever he goes next, having at least 10 fatui members as your body guard 24/7, and him carrying you princess style, on his back, whatever fits wherever the carriages during the travels can't go, cause fucking him is a goodbye to your legs.

Now back to Capitano's big dick problem, this man loves to use your mouth, but his dick is so hard to fit in! So before travelling with you, back in Snezhnaya he had you warm his cock for prolonged amount of time, slowly increasing the length everyday, so your throat can accommodate his monster of a cock, till you can deepthroat like a pro!

Also likes to pleasure you with his mouth and fingers, stretching you out before every session, despite how much experienced you are, because his cock will hurt, and he can't have his little darling in pain, that just ruin his own pleasure.

But, that's Capitano on a normal day, cause behind the gentle boyfriend persona, there's a devious monster, which comes out when the adrenaline kicks in, especially after a battle, the second he sees you, he's ripping your clothes up, plowing you like a rice farmer, with his tongue shoved down your throat. This isn't jut sex anymore, it's your lover's need to be deeper inside you, as a person, as if he wanna fuck your soul, desperate to have you in his eternity.

Kinda likes exhibitionism too, gets super flustered if you point out the soldiers outside your tent could probably hear you getting railed and then start fucking you even harder, blessing them with your pretty moans.

No one brings up your past or your inability to walk for few days after they heard you moaning loud enough to wake a village like a chicken, out of respect for the captain.

★ ⋮ Pierro ⸝⸝

He's too old and grumpy to keep up with your bullshit. Try to flirt with him in front of someone and he smack your head. No he's not blushing! Don't point it out, he has he reputation to keep up.

Out of everyone on this list, Pierro will be the one most embaressed to have a lover like this. He has never been the type to around, always been a straight forward man, focused on his work, ethics and goals, even during his days before Khanneria fell. So now having to deal with you it trully is overwhelming for the old man.

Now that doesn't mean he hates it, this man is a simp in heart for real-for real, he just don't know how to show it and has a big enough ego to not try, so yeah, he's tsundere granpa.

Not a big fan of people talking about your reputation, that just pisses him off, you might have a past, but now you are entirely his, and if someone dares mention it, they will disappear from the face of Tevyat.

Also cause grandpa, he fucks the least in the list, but when he doesss. The man fucks nasty, like a rabid animal, making up for all the denial, 10/10 eyes rolling, multiple orgasms, thighs weakening, throat drying by how much he make you scream.

Likes to degrade you for being a desperate whore, calling you mean names till you cry, only to fuck you harder when he start seeing your tears, god this man loves those tears.

Big on pet play too, like calling you his dumb bunny, telling you how you are as simple minded as an animal, as you mouth his dick, earning you a smack as your teeth graze his cock. Once he starts coming out of his shell, he like to keep you in a collar, sometimes even adding a collar to your neck, and just look at you or drag you around.

| Tell me suggestions for other men who fit in this trope (current list: (Genshin) Zhongli, Neuvillette; (HSR) Welt, Blade, Jing Yuan)

[nanaminokanojo]

ACCIDENTALLY IN LOVE | Sukuna X You | CHAPTER INDEX I /PROLOGUE (Part 1-68)

-meet cute? a cheesy musical number? forget it! love makes itself known to you through a minor car accident, a broken arm, and a treacherously charming temporary chauffeur

CHARACTERS: sukuna x you/reader | jjk characters (uraume, gojo, geto, shoko, nanami, choso, maki, nobara, mei-mei, etc.)

GENRE: full-length smau + prose | bad boy x good girl | college au | a lot of firsts | aged-up characters | strangers to lovers | smut | fluff | angst | ooc depictions - soft sukuna ftw

TW/CW: strong/mature language | adult content so mdni on some parts | mentions of alcohol and/or smoking | mentions of injury, promiscuity and bullying | pet names because they're cute with 2D men | toxic behavior | will add more if something arises

AKI’S NOTES: Reblogs and likes are very much appreciated, and I actively respond to comments as well as Asks. Also, if you’re interested, I will include you in the tag list. Just message me through whatever avenue you’re most comfortable with. Happy reading!

MASTERLIST

A/N: Yup. Intrigue and a video right off the bat.

CHAPTERS: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15

16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30

31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45

46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60

61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | CHAPTER INDEX II

ADDITIONAL NOTES: i will be using pics and other media which would fit situations and make the smau-ness of this piece a little more realistic and entertaining when i believe it’s appropriate/fitting to the plot (as i've done with my other smau). having said that, with regard to inclusivity, i just want to put it out there that they will not necessarily be aimed as the exact descriptions to fit a supposedly generic reader nor will they be representative of a specific race or color. it’s all for the simple fact of media availability, for funsies and the fact that i don’t exclusively write in consideration of those aspects when using reader-insert characters unless i specify it. thank you for understanding.

TAG LIST: CLOSED

PLEASE READ: If you wanna be included in the tag list, please make sure that your “Exclude __(tumblr username)__ from Tumblr search and recommendations” setting is OFF so I can actually tag you guys and you'll get notifs when I update. Thank you very much.

Here's a reference for the instructions from domainofmarie. Thank you very much, my friend. This is very helpful.

A/N: I have another version of this story somewhere on the internet with different characters, and I thought, why not make it a Sukuna smau. So excited for this! This'll probably come out this weekend lol or the next if push comes to shove.

© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI’S “JUJUTSU KAISEN”. [20240514]

PHOTOS/IMAGES/GIF/FANART/ANY MEDIA CREDITS GO TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.

[vindelllas]

a brief exploration of the amatyakarakas 🍸

🍸note: any information regarding amatyakaraka placements should be treated lightly, as a good portion of these celebrities do not have verified birth information. i calculated all of the following celebrities with unverified birth times assuming they were born at noon their time!

🍸the amatyakaraka does not share the immense physical focus of the atmakaraka, but serves as the knight (amatyakaraka) to the king (atmakaraka), as it controls much of the labor/work of the chess of life. it is a karaka designed to aid you in picking a field or hobby that can allow you to fully express the passions of your graha. It is the helpful hand that guides you to who you truly are, in this post i focus on the overarching lessons of this placement.

brihaspati amatyakaraka

🌾 aesthetic: the liberation of the femme fatale

🌾 key components: shares similar characteristics to the femme fatale archetype of brihaspati atmakarakas, but inwardly is garnished with the liberated qualities of brihaspati. this is a placement of timing, expansion, and immense growth in the lens of one's work ethic. this is ultimately why these natives are known for their adventurous (and sometime controversial yet successful) business ventures, e.g. kendall jenner's "818" brand and lana del rey's controversies throughout her musical journey, which are centered around intrinsic learning via the external public eye.

shani amatyakaraka

🪐 aesthetic: the theater of love

🪐 key components: it shares the sensual hollywood starlet aesthetic of shani atmakarakas but this karaka's lesson lies in what they pour themselves into. they excel at possessing the drive and willpower to succeed in their respective fields, but are not without controversy in their private lives. this is emphasized by megan thee stallion's wrongful sh*oting, selena gomez's ex, nicki minaj's infamous husband, julia fox's former partner kanye west, etc.. their incessant focus on their future and work, often leaves much instability in their personal lives outside of their everyday routines.

surya amatyakaraka

🌞 aesthetic: the intersection of promiscuity and materialism

🌞 key components: this placement is similar to the materialism noted in surya atmakaraka natives, but is further heightened by this karaka's penchant for promiscuity. this placement's immensely influential nature and general desire to lead/test others can manifest as a form of sex*al temptation of those around them. from professions of acting to involvement in adult industries to modeling, there is a great need to shine their rays onto those around them. the dichotomy agni (the sun) being of purification and knowledge and soma (the moon) being water and nourishment come into play here. the sun wishes to purify and empower those around them through lessons of spiritual teachings. the general focus of the mouth in the photos of surya amatyakarakas is reflective of the mouth being the vessel of soma/the consumer of water. to achieve the purification of agni, you must first be watered spiritually.

kuja amatyakaraka

☄️ aesthetic: the mysticism confidence

☄️ key components: drawing upon the lessons of kuja atmakarakas, a certain confidence is emphasized within this placement. this confidence lies in taking immense risks and undergoing challenging situations for the betterment of your career, talents, and desires. this is evidenced by amber heard's career-challenging court case and jennifer lawrence's recounts and statements about w*instein. this placement is not without its controversy, but it is a placement of willingness to endure immense controversy for personal gain often without the lesson-emphasis of brihaspati amatyakarakas which results in much healing being needed later on.

buddha amatyakaraka

🌑 aesthetic: the ubiquity of feminism

🌑 key components: learning from the misunderstood lalita, this placement emphasizes a certain call to seeking maturation of the self through a higher power and intellectualism. this placement is symbolic of the overt dichotomy of girlhood-womanhood, these natives personify this experience through their accounts of the male gaze, longings for more expansion within themselves, and consuming all the external rays of others for the purpose of bettering and finding themselves (as buddha does to surya).

shukra amatyakaraka

🍓 aesthetic: the languish of luxury

🍓 key components: this placement indicates a certain affinity yet boredom of the luxurious properties of shukra. it causes many celebrities who grow into financial success to possess a coupled, sometimes delayed, distaste of the spotlight/fame. think of selena quintanilla who grew popular with ease compared to her latina musician counterparts but continued to maintain a relatability to the public (similar to cardi b who is still considered "surprisingly relatable" despite being immensely wealthy compared to the general public).

chandra amatyakaraka

🌙 aesthetic: the insatiable pitfalls of revolution

🌙 key components: these women often serve as role models to individuals through their presence in the media, but often serve as a lesson to the pitfalls that come with being "revolutionary". recall alexis ren who revolutionized mid-2010's social media and fashion yet struggled privately with her eating d*sorder. additionally, kaley cuoco was popularized for her role in "the big bang theory" yet too struggled with her eating habits. this is why some vedic astrologers theorize chandra to be associated with eating d*sorders, as yes soma seeks to nourish, but this nourishment (coupled with the drive/talent/profession denoted in the amatyakaraka) results in a potential for restricting soma (nourishment) to feel in control of one's surroundings--that is one's profession or environment.

🍸all of these placements were found using astrotheme/.com and/or astro-charts/.com. it is important to note that some chandra (moon) placements may be off by up to 6 degrees and lagnas (ascendants/rising signs) as well, due to the fact that many websites do not have 100% accurate birth times for the given celebrities.

🍸i am additionally offering readings again for a limited amount of time! if you are interested in a reading, please privately message me. thank you all for all of your patience! please expect the color analysis post soon since it won the poll <3

xoxo,

angel 💋

[jiskblr]

Tumblr Rules for Redditors

Hello, fellow redditors! Many people are trying to tell you rules about how to Tumblr properly. Many of them are wrong, or assholes, or both. I am also an asshole but I’m going to not be one for a minute to give you some advice:

“Reblog this or you’re a bad person” and any variation on that is a violation of intergalactic law. Don’t do it. Also, refuse to comply if someone else does it.

Generally, people can see what you reblog, but cannot see what you ‘like’. A like may seem like an upvote, but it is much less significant than one, since it doesn’t affect visibility in the slightest. A like will be visible both to the OP of the thread, and to the person whose reblog you put the like on. Like promiscuously! It feels good to get likes and there’s no downside. (Unless you are a space alien AKA influencer.) There’s a setting for like visibility, but it’s still somewhat hard to find even if it’s turned on.

Tumblr nominally has the ability to browse global tags (e.g. seeing the entire site’s posts and reblogs tagged #superwholock or #reddit exodus) and to search the site for things. No one uses them and they don’t really work.

You are probably less surprised by this than denizens of literally any other website on the internet, but there’s mostly no algorithm here. Chronological order only. This now defaults to being on, but you can and should turn it off. (If you’re using the search or global tags, they might have an algorithm, but if they do, it doesn’t work. We don’t know because we don’t use them, because they mostly don’t work either.)

Anyone can have absolutely any conversation in the notes of your post that they like. This is how the website works. You are allowed to complain about it, but don’t expect anyone to humor you. I think it’s possible to make posts unrebloggable and disable replies, but this is essentially refusing to use Tumblr. If you want to do that... go ahead, I guess?

Many people have ‘DNI’ lists in their blog descriptions. This means ‘do not interact’ and indicates that they don’t want you to message them, reblog from them, reblog any posts they are OP of, or even, sometimes, ‘like’ their posts. It is good manners to respect these, if you know they exist, but in normal use you probably won’t look at blog descriptions very often so it is entirely okay to violate them by accident. (When the lists get very long, it becomes impractical to check whether you violate them. Generally, just skip it. You probably don’t want to interact with those people anyway.)

Notes on posts you start will go to you no matter how many intervening hops there are on the reblog chain. If you get a post with an enormous amount of notes, this can get overwhelming. Whatever the current incarnation of Xkit (basically RES for Tumblr except we’ve switched names and maintainers seven times) is, will have a setting to deal with this. If that’s insufficient, the suggested course of action is to reblog your OP to your own blog so that you have a copy for posterity’s sake, and then delete the OP. This silences the notes.

If you and another user both follow each other, you are ‘mutuals’. This makes it much easier to have conversations with each other, which is ordinarily sort of hard since everything is purely chronological. Frequently your mutuals are your friends; if not yet true, they may become your friends.

When you reblog things, you can write words both in the word part and in the tags, Modern tumblr norms are to write long rambling tags in full sentences rather than put words in the main body. Unlike some other norms, violating this one and putting your response in the body of the reblog is not particularly rude. The worst it does is make a reblog chain long. Probably don’t reblog things and just say “This.”, though.

Tags can be subjected to peer review, by which we mean someone copy-pastes your tags and/or screenshots them and adds them to the main body of their reblog. Generally this is a compliment. The alternative is to say “#prev tags”, and this makes everyone hate you because it’s hard to find which tags were ‘prev’. Please just peer review properly if they’re good.

If you want to search your blog, consider Siikr. Don’t overuse it, it’s one guy’s project.

Be verbose! This ain’t Twitter, no character limit. (Not even the really large character limit of a reddit comment.) Write a 3000-word story in a single reblog if you want, that sounds awesome. Use ‘read more’ if you do, though. Posts can be very long, one of our oldest memes is about this.

Infinite scroll is the default, but you can turn it off. Actually, check all the settings, many of them will improve your experience.

On queues: Go nuts. Some people put everything in the queue, some people almost nothing. Some queue specific aestheticposting (personally I do #too smol) and post other things normally. Most people who queue a lot add a queue-specific tag like #the mighty queue or #this queue shall pass, or at least I notice them more than poasters with untagged queues.

You know how Reddit lets you buy Gold and people go 'thanks for the gold kind stranger'? On tumblr we spend money on Tumblr Blaze, and it is considered the PvP section of Tumblr. Though sometimes people actually use it to spread posts they like, such as people attempting to evangelize Christianity (no, really, that happened a lot) or the, I hope, actually-kind stranger who blazed this OP. You can turn off PvP with one of the many settings.

Everybody be excellent to each other!

[nataliescatorccioapologist]

Let’s talk about one of the most underrated dynamics in Yellowjackets: Nat and Tai

Nat and Tai have such a troubled little sister/protective big sister dynamic that is not talked about enough.

Before the crash, there is clearly a lot of tension in Nat and Tai’s relationship. Their personalities clash a bit, as Tai is driven and ambitious while Nat is more reckless and directionless. Tai doesn’t understand Nat’s drug use and promiscuity and openly criticizes her for it. Tai is focused on the success of the team and she sees Nat and her behavior as an obstacle to this success.

However, I think there is some care behind her harsh statements. We can see her tough love approach towards Nat starting to develop. She wants Nat to get better, she just has a gruff way of showing it.

We see Tai begin to develop more of a softness for Nat after the crash. I think, as Tai begins to experience what it feels what it’s like to be in survival mode (and starts to lose control of herself) as Nat has been for most of her life, she begins to understand Nat and her coping mechanisms more.

Another important part of their dynamic is that they were the last two skeptics remaining in the Wilderness. When Natalie would challenge Lottie, Tai was often the first (and only) person to back her up. They are both grounded in pragmatism and logic.

Nat and Tai also have the shared experience of watching their partners “go the the dark side” (AKA join Lottie’s cult). Van and Travis are arguably some of Lottie’s most devoted followers towards the end of Season 2, and both Tai and Nat struggle to grapple with this and the rift it creates in their respective romantic relationships.

After they are rescued, Taissa manages to pick herself back up while Nat falls apart, and their little sister/big sister dynamic grows even more as a result. Tai pays for Nat’s rehab, tries to keep her away from Travis because she knows he’s bad for her, keeps pulling her back up and trying to keep her on her feet. I think it says a lot that Tai is the first person Nat thinks to call when she’s arrested.

And then, of course, there’s the scene where Tai defends her decision to pay for Nat’s rehab and continue to try to keep her clean. This scene breaks my heart and shows the caretaker role Taissa has taken on for Nat after the crash. She understands why Nat copes the way she does, and she knows that, unlike Shauna and herself, Nat doesn’t have a support system to rely on.

Even when Nat is being crowned as the new AQ I feel like you can see the concern on Tai’s face. Tai pledges her support of Nat’s new leadership, but you can tell she is also wary of the burden being placed on Nat, and how that might affect her.

Tai’s face is somber like she’s worried about her, but she gives Nat’s hand a small little squeeze of reassurance.

Anyways, I just love how Nat and Tai’s relationship transforms and grows over time. Tai has an empathy and care for Nat that the other survivors just don’t seem to have. I can’t wait to see more of their dynamic post-rescue as Tai struggles to keep Nat afloat and pick up the pieces after her toxic stints with Travis.

This has been way longer than I intended it to be, I’ll just leave y’all with this last clip of Nat giving petulant little sister vibes with Tai that I absolutely love…

[lolaandthens0me]

What does it mean to be a diaper slut?

Hello there Anon and thank you for this question. Reclaiming the word and label of slut is a passion of mine, so I’m excited to talk more about this!

For me, the term slut means an empowered person who uses their sexuality and eagerness to play in promiscuity with ethical boundaries and impassioned joy to share love and create more joy around them. I choose to share my body with those who care for it and who view it with respect and lust for exactly who I am…a slut. I ask you to look at my body, to see my diaper, and invite you to get aroused. I think sharing my body in this way helps others to find joy and self love within, which in turn does the same for me.

I believe that my vocation on this Earth is to share my love and to share my body. In doing so I help others to heal, I help others to feel loved, I help others to accept themselves and their kinks, I help others to cum and feel good in their bodies, I help others to love themselves. This is a beautiful gift. When I say that I am a slut, this is the term I use and identify with in order to live and share myself in this way.

I freely give people permission to call me a slut. That does not mean I give permission to disrespect me or otherwise interact with me in a manner beyond our current relationship. And this also does not give people permission to call anyone else a slut, unless they communicate that desire and give permission to do so.

I prefer the term diaper slut when talking within an abdl context. I don’t really identify as adult baby nor as a diaper lover. Rather, I’m a diaper slut. I like to wear and use my diapers as an act of submission and for the enjoyment of peeing myself and feeling wet. I feel sexy and turned on in diapers, and so they mostly hold a sexual space for me. Although I wear 24/7, that doesn’t mean I’m aroused all of the time, but there is a low-level current of sexual energy underlying my days. Because I’m 24/7 as part of my 24/7 submission, I have a button to press which excites me and may arouse me at anytime. I’m always reminded of my place while wearing diapers, which allows me to connect to my body and to my Daddy/Dom all day long.

I am a slut. I am a diaper slut. And I am proud and happy to be so. Slut: this empowering term has helped to guide my path to living a most authentic life.✨

[beta-therapy]

Female Sexual Freedom = More Sexless Men?

By all metrics, female sexual freedom is at an all-time high in Western society. In this discussion, female sexual freedom / liberation / empowerment is a general term used to describe women’s

-openness to casual sex,

-average number of sexual partners, and

-ability to be sexually promiscuous without social repercussions.

We see today’s women, in large numbers, going out in revealing outfits that draw attention to their sexual features. We know that the typical modern woman does not have the same hesitation toward casual sex that women had 30 years ago. Rather than hide her sexuality and treat it as sacred, she wears it like a crown, unapologetically. She flaunts it on social media.

This is just one effect of a broad scale cultural change in the developed world. As we become more scientifically and technologically savvy, there is a large movement to depart from the ancient wisdom encoded in religious principles, and instead, to derive our values from rationality.

And this is the result. A population of free, empowered women who live with a focus on fun and pleasure. They reject religious dogma (it’s just a bunch of arbitrary rules!). Since there aren’t any objective values and everyone can pick their own, this leads to the feminine tendency to be inclusive and tolerant of everyone (except when it comes to sexual selection, of course. There’s no inclusivity there, but it’s just biology so you should respect women’s decisions).

Now here is the paradox. Sexuality has become a lot more public. Women are much more open to engaging in casual sex. Hookup culture is widespread. We’ve never lived in a more sexual society. So it should follow that your everyday, average Joe is getting a lot more sex, because the barrier to sex is so low, right?

Actually, the opposite is true. The average guy experiences a barrier to sex that has never been higher. It is fair to say the average man today is invisible to women. Check out the standards females set for men today. Check out the statistics on male sexlessness. The number of sexless men has been rapidly increasing every year in this digital age.

The culture is becoming extremely sexual, but here’s the catch: the only men who get to participate are those in the top tier (the men who women actually want to have sex with).

Therefore, instead of saying we live in a hypersexual society, it’s more accurate to say that women are no longer beholden to traditional values, so they can freely express their deepest desires, and instead of getting shamed, they are accepted. We are letting their true colors shine through!

And what did those true colors turn out to be?

Women love sex! But not with an average guy.

In plain, honest terms, what women want is to chase the man with value. The man who could get any girl. She wants to seduce him. Make him fall in love with her. That’s the female sexual fantasy that we’re watching play out. It has nothing to do with giving out sex to an average guy.

This paradox is an example of the tug-of-war between freedom and equity.

Society has removed much of the stigma on sexual promiscuity, substantially increasing our ability to freely make sexual decisions without getting judged. We’re taking down the barriers on sex and sexual behavior, so it’ll be more accessible to everyone!

But the effect is the complete opposite of “more sex for everyone.” Women’s freedom to act out their deepest desires without apology has resulted in the strongest social caste system of men, because those deep desires only pertain to alphas. Some men fuck hundreds of girls. For other men, the only way to have sex is to pay for it.

The same consideration applies to every item of public policy. The laissez faire capitalist system is attractive because everyone is free to make their own decisions. But since consumers are naturally going to select the best products available, the system is prone to monopolistic takeover. The result is that everyone buys from the same few companies, and your average Joe cannot enter the playing field because he has no ability to compete.

We know one thing for certain. Freedom is key! We should all be free to pursue our highest potential. That’s equality of opportunity. You can’t control the outcome without infringing freedom. Some of us will achieve at a high level and reap all the rewards, but most of us will never come close no matter how hard we try. At the end of the day, we accept the rewards if we’ve won, and if not, we don’t complain when we see the spoils awarded to others.

[coldxperience]

Lan Sect's known rules !

▷MDZS Home Page

We are all aware of the famous wall of rules at the Gusu Lan Sect, which Wei Wuxian has a hard time following.

Well, according to the MDZS novel, there were 3,000 rules when they were students, and 4,000 rules 13 years later after Wei Wuxian was resurrected.

I managed to compile 180 rules and divided them into categories.

Sources:

The official printed novel The drama (Youtube) The anime/donghua (Youtube)

Interpretation:

There might be translation mishaps from Chinese to English. One thing could be interpreted in various ways depending on context. (note: neither Chinese nor English are not my native languages.)

THE RULES:

▷ Rules on appropriate behavior: (39 rules)

Lan clan disciples must follow the principles of the Lan

Do not work after 9 pm

Do not rise after 5 am / Do not wake up at 8 am

Do not go out at night

Those who come at night should not be allowed in until 7 AM

Do not be late

Do not enter Cloud Recesses without permission

No one is permitted to attend the lectures without an invitation

Do not enter the back hills without permission

Do not fight without permission (alternate: fighting without permission is prohibited)

Do not create damages

Do not take life within Cloud Recesses (alternate: do not kill within the premises)

Do not stand incorrectly (have a proper posture)

Do not sit improperly (sitting improperly is prohibited)

Do not make noise (causing noise is prohibited)

Do not hurry rashly (do not act impulsively; running is prohibited)

Do not move arbitrarily

Do not smile for no reason (do not smile foolishly, do not laugh for no reason)

Sneering for no reason is prohibited

Do not drink alcohol (alcohol is prohibited)

Do not consume meat

Killing livestock within the area is prohibited

Do not be difficult with food (do not be picky about food)

Do not eat more than three bowls

Do not talk during mealtimes

Pets are not permitted

Change clothes after a shower

Wear a headband to discipline yourself

Do not touch others’ headbands without permission

A headband is not to be used for any other purpose

Only a spouse or child may touch the headband

Do not bribe a law enforcer

Do not use a concealed weapon

Do not hide an edged tool

Do not wear any jangling objects like beads

Do not wear more than three accessories around your waist

Do not alter clothes secretly

Never hurt insects or plants

Do not borrow money

▷ Rules related to personal virtues: (63 rules)

Love and respect yourself

Behave yourself

Be respectful (be courteous)

Be modest Arrogance is prohibited

Hide your wisdom

Do not show off your skills

Be humble

Do not be supercilious

Be amicable and united

Be strict with yourself

Have a strong will and anything can be achieved

Diligence is the root

Morality is the priority

Harmony is the value

Be ethical

Uphold the value of justice

Be just

Shoulder the weight of morality

Perform acts of chivalry

Have courage and knowledge

Have courtesy and integrity

Do not be ill-mannered

Have affection and gratefulness

Be compassionate

Be generous

Frugality is a moral

Give more, take less

Do not expect rewards after giving

Do not be miserly

Do not regret offering

Accumulate virtue and merits

Make sure to act virtuously

Be grateful

Be grateful when praised

Stop bad habits

Destroy the five poisons (desire, anger, ignorance, pride, & jealousy)

Do not indulge in pleasure

Do not be promiscuous

Do not indulge in debauchery

Do not wallow in luxury and pleasure (do not live extravagantly/in luxury)

Be peaceful when insulted

Do not succumb to rage

Speak meagrely, for too many words only bring harm

Do not be haughty and complacent

Do not be of two minds

Do not exult in excess (do not be excessively/too happy)

Do not grieve in excess (do not be excessively/too sad)

Do not covet the property of others

Do not steal

Do not be greedy

Be careful with your words

Do not use coarse language

Do not tell lies

Do not take your own words lightly

Do not sow discord

Do not use flowery writing (do not write about love and sex; do not use frivolous language; or do not spread empty lines)

Do not say one thing and mean another (do not break promises; do not go back on your word)

Do not boast about your own strengths

Believe sincerely

Do not be suspicious

Do not be wasteful

Do not break faith and abandon the right

Do not be unreasonable

▷ Rules for training, studying, and learning: (8 rules)

Learning comes first

Train your body and your mind

Maintain your own discipline

Organise work properly

Do not neglect your studies

Do not give up on learning

Do not lose your life goal

Nurture aspirations

▷ Rules for interacting with others: (48 rules)

Love all beings

Embrace the entirety of the world

Honor good people

Appreciate the good people

Good people will be esteemed, blessed by nature, and followed by good fortune

Respect the filial ones

Be fair, and they will follow you

Be trustworthy, and they will believe you

Be mighty, and they will die for you

Be loyal

Earn trust

Win friendships with kindness

See friends as neighbors

Steer away from bad men

Correct others by correcting yourself

Do not fear the strong

Do not ignore others and be undisciplined 

Help the lonely

Take pity on the desolate

Do not despise poverty

Do not bully the weak (bullying is prohibited)

Do not mix public and private interests

Help the underprivileged

Care for the weak

Lend a hand to those in need

Rescue those in danger

Do not take advantage of your position or connections to oppress others

Do not build wealth by using others, for this wealth won’t last

Do not curry favor (flatter)

Do not go tuft-hunting

Do not be a social climber

Do not form a clique and exclude others

Do not insult people

Do not use bad words to hurt others

Do not tease others

Do not praise yourself and slander others

Do not jump to an unfounded conclusion (do not make assumptions about others; do not judge others quickly)

Do not judge people behind their backs (do not speak ill of others; speaking behind other people’s backs is prohibited)

Speak not about other people’s weaknesses

Be easy on others

Be sad for other people’s sufferings

Rejoice in other people’s blessings

Regard other people’s gains and losses as your own

Do not hold grudges

Have wins and losses

If others win over you, do not envy

If others lose to you, do not look down

Do not take apprentices excessively, nor pass ordinary people

▷ Rules for respecting those in authority: (11 rules)

Respect the elderly

Do not disrespect the elder

Do not disregard the younger

Do not forget the grace of the forefathers

Be loyal, filial, friendly, and dutiful

Be a filial child

Do not argue with your family, for it doesn’t matter who wins

Honor the teachers and respect the elders

If your senior is standing, you may not sit until they have done so

Teachers have extensive knowledge and are examples of moral integrity

Disturbing female cultivators is prohibited

▷ Rules on cultivation, good and evil: (11 rules)

Concentrate on cultivating

To suppress and eliminate ghosts and monsters, liberate them

Stay on the righteous path

Take the straight path (follow the righteous way)

Reject the crooked road (do not take the crooked ways)

Eliminate evil and establish a just law

Do not associate with evil

Do not befriend the evil

Do not fall to evil

Resist evil

Promote good

▷ Bonus rule:

Wei Wuxian isn't allowed. (Do not get near Wei Ying)

▷MDZS Home Page

[completed ; 10/07/2024]

★ ⁺. ໒꒰ྀི｡- ˕ -｡꒱ྀི১ ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა ˖⁺‧₊˚

[starshipsofstarlord]

Petrova

summary - games were always katherine’s intentions, and as the prized possession and girlfriend of her nemesis and doppelgänger elena gilbert, she just had to have you (2.7k)

warnings - 18+ smut minors dni, fingering, cheating, swearing, slight degradation, mentions of katherine’s past

katherine pierce works other tvd works masterlist

There was one that hated your girlfriend with a deadly intent; her name was Katherine Pierce, she was a destructive vampire, who had taken much a toll on people's lives. It was her life goal to make people sufficiently miserable, for she felt the same, she had been chased for her bloodline for hundreds of years by one of the most powerful families. Her ignited hatred was directed towards Elena Gilbert, the woman that you were dating. Elena was a spark of joy in the darkness that often gloomed over Mystic Falls, she was a symbol of eternal mortality that often had your body intertwined in comfort, however there was something in regard to Katerina Petrova that made your heart rapidly beat, and your palms grow sweaty. They shared the same appearance so perhaps that could have been why you were so drawn to her, but you knew that wasn't it all alone; the aura that she carried was addictive like a drug, it was understandable how both Salvatore brothers had fallen for the promiscuous vampire, claiming to love her at times. And whilst your feelings were not that strong towards the strong immortal, lust encased you each and every time that you thought of her, even if you were in the company of your own girlfriend, of whom you were currently with.

Her locks were straight as she combed her hands through the brunette strands, she was seated by the window in her bedroom, a familiar book beholden in between her fingers as she scrawled on the pages with ink that dispersed from the black pen that she was using. Her journal. It was filled with many secrets and first hand experiences of the dangerous encounters that she faced, and most people would be driven by the darkness inside of their souls to look inside, but you were not, you assumed it was because when it boiled down to it you had your own secrets that you had no intentions to share with Elena, and that you understood that on a personal note that there were some things that people preferred to keep private. And thus, you respected the space that she needed to release her thoughts as you lay on her bed, removing your gaze so that it was aimed up at the ceiling, and allowed your mind to drift away to your own secrets. It went back to Katherine, as though she were a sickness that you just couldn't shake, and that was a rather accurate way to describe it. Admittedly you felt quite an arise of guilt as you were splayed upon your partner's bed thinking of another woman, it wasn't right nor fair.

A part of you wished that you could tell Elena the truth about how you felt, you loved her and you had no goals to hurt her in the way that expressing your dark attraction towards her doppelganger would do. She continuously compared herself to her vampire counterpart, and you didn't need to make her feel any more insecure about their relation and indifferent outer appearances than she already did, and so you sat up, dragging your eyes over to Elena again. The way that she was so invested and lost in recounting her experience was beautiful, it was as though everything, but her body had abandoned this timeline, and that she was becoming a part of the past all over again. It caused a content smile to appear on your face; she was all that you needed, and thus you stood from the bed and began to walk towards her, catching her attention. Her opal brown eyes focused on you, lifting up from the paper she had scribbled upon as she put it on the side beside her. "It's getting rather late, I think I should head out." You told her to which she stood, enclosing the space between the pair of you, unaware of why you were really leaving. The guilt was still eating away at you, and until you awoke in the morning, it would remain there, tomorrow was going to be a fresh start, you planned not to think about Katherine whatsoever.

A small crush never hurt anybody, but this was deeper than that, and would be to Elena also. The best thing to do would be shake all remnants of emotion out of the truth, and prioritise the relationship that you were currently in. Elena wound her arms around your neck, pressing your bodies closer together, and if it were in her fashion you were sure she would have pouted, but that was definitely more of a Katherine thing. "Okay." She spoke with a smile, not suspicious in the slightest which was a major relief. "I'll miss you, and I'll see you tomorrow morning at cheer practice." To put an all-consuming finale to her words, she conjoined your lips, and that was how Katerina Petrova left your mind and was diverted elsewhere in your brain. Your hand weaved into the back of her perfectly styled hair, inherently pulling her closer to rouse more passion into the kiss, ensuring that she knew that you loved her although the pair of you hadn't said those words yet. It wasn't that you didn't feel anything for her, but you forbade yourself from saying such a meaningful sentiment until she was the only one that made your stomach churn and your heart coil from impact of ravenous beats.

Finally, the pair of you split apart, your lips dragging along one another's one last time until that was it. "Bye babe." Your fingers caressed her arm as you retraced your steps out from her room, descending down the stairs and out of the house, to where you saw Jeremy talking to Alaric by his truck. You sent them a wave on your way off the drive as you walked through the streets of Mystic Falls all by your lonesome; it'd have been a stupid thing for just anyone to do, however you knew of the dangers that lurked when the sun set, and to be accurate whilst it was still in the sky. Vampires had the tactical advantage of daylight rings which therefore allowed them to perform their stalking of prey whenever they wished, and they would not disintegrate to ash for it. There was a feeling tugging at your gut when you got closer to your home that you were being followed, you whipped your head around but to no avail saw anything. Either it was all in your head or whatever had an idea to pick you up for dinner knew what they were doing, you had a suspicion of the latter and thus picked up your pace, wanting to get inside to avoid a run in with a bloodsucker.

However you should have known that it would have realised that you had caught onto its almost invisible advances, and one you were about to head down the last turning to reach your home, a hand grabbed you, tugging you into the area between two houses. A tired sigh fell from your lips; you'd recognise that intoxicating perfume any day, you'd spent hours trying to get this particular vampire out of your head and when you had finally managed to do so, she chooses to track you down. "What do you want Katherine?" The brunette cocked her head at you, snickering lightly at your question, as though she were amused by interlocking two brothers to be in love with her, which she had done before. And now you were her target, she would strip you down to your very core until you were a withering servant to her heart, and make you forget all about her doppelganger. She was far more interesting anyways, and exciting and could show you far more than the small town girl that you had committed yourself to.

But you loved Elena, she was the one that you knew logically you could have a future with, rather than being on the run with for the rest of your sorry life. "I thought it was obvious," she carried a sprawled and prideful smile upon her features, as her chocolate eyes probed at you for a selfish purpose, and you felt adequately drawn into her sultry trap. And the worst thing was, you couldn't find it in yourself to be swallowing guilt, she had captured you and intermingled your essence into her deviousness, even after all of the horrid games that she had played. You should of resented everything of her entire being, considering her satire feud against your partner and friends, however her very personality beneath her traumatic past made you evoke pity for the woman.

Sighing heavily, you kept your eyes fixed, forcing them not to roll at the suspension that she purposely left you with. "You aren't getting anything from me Katherine, so knock off the act. Leave me and Elena alone, maybe occupy yourself with Damon and Stefan as you once had; you've already ruined their lives, so allow the rest of us to get on with our own." But despite your words, that wasn't what you'd ever admit that you wanted, you loved the adrenaline that you experienced when you were in her resented company, it was dangerous and exciting, and you hated that you felt addicted to it - to her. She cocked a fragrant smile once again, her irises illuminating with deviancy, which was nothing estranged from Katherine's usual self.

"I don't care about little, precious Elena," she blankly and openly stated, daring to inch closer to your personal space which you had previously accounted to be forbidden. "However I am quite enamoured with you, perhaps you'd enjoy 'spending time' with somebody who is more exhilarating than Elena." Katherine Pierce was a confident woman, and she enjoyed putting Elena in where she thought to be her place, however you couldn't cave without a dire purpose, you did love Elena... but the sweet pungency of her perfume hit your nostrils, making your brain delirious and no doubt your actions swayed by her vixen like seduction. "Come on y/n/n, live a little. I'd be pleased to be her upgraded replacement, after all, I always get what I want."

"And you want me?" You pretended to sound astounded, an aghast facade of shock exhibiting across your face as your brows drew wearingly together. But you weren't nervous about Katherine's actions, you wanted to have control over your own, to be stubborn against her effective persuasion. Too many had fallen victim to her cunning sexual appeal, and whilst you couldn't fault them to the magnetising tug that she pulled them in with as you were conditioned with the same plague, you couldn't do that out of not only the respect that you held towards those you cared for, but yourself as well. But your body fought aggressively against your rationalising mind, desiring to be dangerously closer to the immortal woman before you.

"I haven't been vacant about that fact," she once again moved closer, her face directly before yours, "and I can't blame myself. I've always loved the chase after a beautiful woman, but the time is up and the game is finally over, because Elena or no Elena, I will take what I want, just like she did with the Salvatores." She was using the mention of Damon and Stefan to bait you, you remembered watching them pine after your girlfriend and it awoke a fuse within your human soul. Jealousy, you shared the feeling of which the vampire in your eye line held for your relationship with her soft natured doppelgänger, and it brewed a heavy weight in your chest. She had you exactly where she had intended, and she took it as her vast opportunity to whisk her face significantly closer, brushing her poisonous lips against your own.

"Then prove it Katherine." The sin washed over you, and before you knew it your body was against the uncomfortable brick wall behind you, her mouth practically devouring your own. And you hated to pursue such a cheat, but Katherine always had a point, no matter how cruel and satire it was to be. Your heart patted in your vulnerable body like a blood induced marathon, and the monster in disguise could hear every beat, and it only aroused her slyness farther. It would be sensible and a control of your morals to stop kissing her, but the way her hands massaged your hips had you squirming in conjunction to pressing your thighs together that were trapped from a sexual relief.

It was her intention to prove everything to you, and your muse of a body, she could sense through all of her versatile abilities that she was driving you stirringly insane. "I told you I get exactly what I want." She hissed from the barricade of your clashing teeth, her hands creeping inwards and creeping up to the button of your jeans, expertly zipping down its metallic fly. You were already wet, and although she knew already knew due to her stern direction of scent, it held no comparison to feeling your wetness drizzle wantonly down her fingers that had discovered the inside of your underwear.

She twirled her experienced digits around your folds, before drifting upwards to your sensitive clit, that yearned for attention every time that the enemy that shared an appearance with your girlfriend was near. "Fuck." You whimpered, throwing your head back and resting it on the neighbourhood architecture, pouting when she decided to neglect your rosey bud of pleasure, however she had no discern to uphold the desperate contact that she shared with you. Instead she travelled further between your spasming thighs, drifting the length of her finger through your wet entrance, and it easily glided inside.

"I doubt Elena has ever had you like this, holding pretty tears in your eyes." She taunted you, smirking wickedly when she added another within your walls, picking up the pace in which she fucked you with them. You wanted to bite back, yell or scream a phrase of argument, but your current predicament proved otherwise. You grew closer to the overwhelming edge, your head growing delirious, and you realised that you had never been pushed towards an orgasm so fast in such little time. "Cum for me y/n, you know you want to." It was impossible to do anything but obey the dominant brunette, and thus you followed suit of her words, your cunt clenching tightly around her two fingers as you reached your blissful landing upon your orgasm.

A few minutes passed before she retracted her fingers from within you, your mind continuing to be hazy for a long and silent moment, and you missed witnessing Katherine feeding herself from your juices that had spilled over her fingers. As you opened your eyes despite the dreary wash of endorphins that stunned your mind, reality came crashing down, and you ushered a distance from Katerina Petrova, your hands grasping at the realisation that appeared to be in your hair follicles. "Shit! Elena..." You were a cheater, as bad as Katherine back when she toyed with the brothers that had been poised as her puppets, and you had fallen as her prey.

"It's okay, it can be our little secret. And so can next time." She agonisingly attempted to comfort you, reaching her hand up to grab at your face, however this time you didn't hesitate to slap it away, overcome with guilt that should have stopped you from swaying along with her ploy of getting in your pants, and intently your heart. "No." You ushered back at her, imposing a state of redress upon yourself as you recoiled with disgust at yourself. "It shouldn't have happened, and it won't ever happen again." But the traitorous villain before you had the feeling that you were telling a lie, as she had told many in the span of over 500 long and disturbed years whilst she ran away from those that wished to hunt her. They were bigger predators, Originals, but you were merely a human, and the target of a spiteful vampire that would take everything she wanted.