#respect for whom? surely not the average woman who lives there

[latenightsinpemberley]

not one of my female co-workers glamorising sharia law countries bc she's dating an arab man. that just so happens to come from a filthy rich family 🙄

[kamisatomay018]

My devotion and my love is all for you, Rex Lapis

A Zhongli version of the legend of the Red String of fate cuz why not! Very fluff with lots of love!

Zhongli x female reader

Please note that for this fanfic, your powers will be like Ningguang so there won’t be any confusion as you read ahead, and the artwork is not mine. Enjoy!

The chirping of birds, the sweet scent of your favourite Qingxin flowers, distant chatter of the people of liyue along with the sounds of carts moving through the lanes was what you could observe as you sat atop the mountain near the Lisha region. You were seated besides the Statue of the Seven, which was of your beloved Archon, Rex Lapis. While liyue kept moving ahead, you were forever stuck in time, perhaps right beside the statue of your Archon. For reasons that you yourself could not explain, you always felt a connection to Rex Lapis, an undeniable sense of devotion, admiration and love was filled in your heart for the God of Contracts. Perhaps it was because you were a citizen of Liyue, or perhaps because you were half adepti, or maybe because you held a vision of his element, a very minute part of his own powers that he had felt you were worthy of.

Due to the presence of adepti blood in your being, your life was way longer than an average human’s. You were almost a hundred years old now, yet you looked as young as a woman in her mid 20s, beautiful and graceful, with golden eyes and brown hair just like your Archon. You were a very famous painter, your paintings were demanded all across teyvat, though you made sure your identity was kept hidden. You liked to live in seclusion, away from mortals, especially the people of Liyue whom you had started to now despise deep down. Why? Because in your eyes, they were nothing but ungrateful. Months had passed since the news of Rex Lapis’ death was announced, and yet you saw not a single sign of remorse on the faces of these people. When Rex Lapis had died, people did not mourn truly, for merchants were worried about their businesses, the predictions of trade, the formation of mora. All they cared about was their own selfish desires, and not the fact that the great Archon who had built this city, protected it for over 6000 years had passed away. Only a single Right of Parting and everyone forgot him?

But you certainly did not. The day you heard that Rex Lapis was gone, you had felt your heart shatter into a million pieces, and you had cried bitterly for days, leaving the city and hiding away in the mountains. It took a week for Madam Ping to find you, and she was full of pity at your state. You seemed inconsolable, refusing to believe that the strongest Archon had passed away, that too assassinated. That was the day you decided to stop living in Liyue Harbour, and madam ping respected your wishes, gifting you a teapot made out of adeptal magic. You were so grateful for her, after all she was the one who had raised you after your father abandoned you when you were just a small child. Since then, you had refused to go to liyue harbour except for the days you visited madam ping and Yanfei, who was like a little sister to you. You spent most of your time in your teapot, painting endlessly for hours, and when you would come out, you would sit right here, besides the statue of the seven.

People barely hiked up this mountain, which gave you the peace and tranquility of spending time with the Archon. And no, although it may seem like it, you weren’t obsessed with Rex Lapis, you just felt an overwhelming sense of love and devotion towards him. Deep down in your heart, something in you told you that he was still alive, and you prayed that wherever he was today, he was at peace. He deserved it after all. And just like every other day, you now sat with your back against the statue, using your elemental powers to summon some glittering rocks, which floated above your palms. You loved your vision dearly, it was the best gift you had ever received. You were a strong fighter, not even needing any weapon for you could conjure rocks according to your wish.

You felt truly at peace when you sat near the statue of the seven, and you would occasionally rant about all your worries and feelings, as if Rex Lapis was there, listening to you. Maybe, maybe not, but what mattered to you was that you felt calm after doing so, getting some sort of reassurance that everything would one day be alright. You had never seen Rex Lapis, and despite how devoted you were, you never attended the Rite of Descention, because you absolutely hated being among greedy merchants and rich businessmen who did not care for their Archon but only for his divine predictions. Sitting alone in the peaceful silence, you unknowingly fell asleep, completely unaware of how much your life was going to change when you would wake up.

“Rise!”

You frowned, waking up to hear the sound of someone fighting. you opened your eyes, spotting a tall man with long hair fighting against two Stonehide lawachurls. You gasped, immediately standing up wishing to help him out, but were stopped by a geo barrier all around you. Even more perplexing was the fact that he immediately defeated the monsters, seeming unfazed and simply dusting off his elegant suit. Who was this man? Sensing that you were awake, he turned around to face you, and that’s when your entire world stopped. As both your eyes interlocked, gold meeting gold, a beautiful Red String of Fate revealed itself, tied around your pinky finger and his. He was your soulmate, your partner for life. The geo barrier around you faded away, as the unknown man walked towards you, seeming rather calm and unfazed by this revelation, as if he already knew.

“Are you alright?” The words seemed to slip past your lips without your consent, making the man in front of you chuckle softly. Oh gosh, his smile was so pretty. “Indeed I am, you needn’t worry about me. I am glad I reached here on time, otherwise the situation would’ve been worse.” His words were so gentle, his voice as deep as an ocean that you could listen to him talk endlessly for hours. “Who are you..?” He smiles once more, his golden eyes scanning your surroundings as he walks towards the statue, placing his hand on it. You gasped, your eyes widening as you saw his clothes transform into something similar to what the statue wore, his white and black clothing seeming so majestic, his arms now being the shade of the geo element itself. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Rex Lapis himself was standing in front of you, in all his glory and might. You bowed onto the ground in respect “Rex Lapis..” you then felt a gentle hand holding yours, making you stand up and look into his eyes. “You needn’t bow in front of me, you needn’t bow in front of anyone. You are my mate, you are my equal.”

You had so many questions, so many thoughts and so many emotions that you could not process anything. Tears fell from your eyes, as you looked at your soulmate, your Archon standing in front of you. How lucky you were, to be fated as the soulmate of Rex Lapis himself. As he moved away from the statue, his mighty form dissipated, making him turn back to his more human form, with the same suit he wore when you first saw him. He gently wiped your tears away, letting you take your time. He knew all of this was way too overwhelming for you, but he could not keep his identity from you a secret. “I…how…My Lord..please, I cannot understand what’s going on..” Zhongli now chuckled, embracing you protectively, and in an instant you calmed down, just the way you would when you sat beside his statue. You closed your eyes, cherishing his warmth, listening to his heart beating.

“Forgive me for taking so many months- no, years..to find you, many things stood in my path of finding you, a lot of which would’ve caused harm to you. I had to be away to protect you..as for my death, as you can see, it was all a lie. I have always been able to sense your presence, your voice, your thoughts and emotions. But I did not know who you were, and where you could be..It is thanks to my old friend Madam Ping that I was able to finally find you today.”

You listened to him carefully, nodding against his chest, making him chuckle softly at how endearing you seemed right now. He had been searching for you for so long, but he would be stuck at work at the Wangsheng funeral parlour, and then he wouldn’t feel your presence near the statue, nor could he find anyone with your voice in liyue harbour. Whenever you were near his statue, Zhongli would be able to hear your thoughts, your sweet honeyed voice filling the empty void in his heart. For so long, he had been alone and suffering. But now he had found you, his better half, his companion forever. “I know that all of this is very overwhelming for you, and I would be completely fine with giving you all the time and space you may need.” You immediately shook your head, acting on impulse as you hugged him tight. His warmth was too soothing, the eternal bond of the red string between you both making you crave his presence even more. “Please don’t go..”

He smiles at those words, hugging you ever so protectively, one hand on your head while the other wrapped around your waist. “I will never leave you, my beloved.” You smiled so much, still being in such disbelief that Rex Lapis himself was embracing you and calling you his beloved. “In my heart, I always knew you weren’t gone..but..if I may ask..why did you choose to do this?” A very expected question, and a justified one. Zhongli knew he couldn’t reveal the entire reason as to why he gave up his gnosis for he was bound by a contract, but he told you what he could. “One day, I was walking among the streets of Liyue, and I heard a conversation between two men. The first man told the second, “you have done your job, now you can rest” this made me wonder, have I finished my duties as the Rex Lapis? I realised that the people of Liyue no longer needed an archon, and that it was about time that I too, chose to rest.”

You understood the depth of his words, and knew that he deserved this. He had protected liyue for countless millennia, and now he was tired, now he wished for some normalcy in his life. “I understand…and even if the people have forgotten, I will never forget how much you have given to this land, to this city, to its people..I’m so thankful for everything that you’ve done Rex Lapis..” Oh, what a rare gem you are. No one had ever said these words to him, no one had ever been as devoted towards him as you were, no one had loved him as much as you had. He placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. “You are a rare gem indeed my beloved..but you need not address me as Rex Lapis, you can call me Zhongli, which is the name I’ve taken since I adopted the life of a mortal. Or if you wish to call me by any names of endearment, I would not be opposed to those either.”

You giggled at that, hugging him so close. You had found your happiness, the answer to all your prayers, the fruit of your endless devotion and the one who owns your heart and your love. Now you had a new reason to look forward to each day, but this time, there would be no need of going to the Statue of the Seven.

[strawberrysatellite]

just too soft for all of it

inspired by sweet nothing by taylor swift

word count: 3.7k

Y/N had never been a soft person.

At least, that’s what she led others to believe.

She had always portrayed herself to others as a slightly harsh, determined young woman with a solid head on her shoulders and no time for disrespect.

Don’t get her wrong, she had fun. Always. She had a solid group of friends who all loved her and knew her personally, going out for drinks or having game nights with them always filled with laughter.

But to anyone outside her immediate friends and family, she often came off as abrasive and more of a cactus than a cuddly bear. Nothing in particular had caused her to be this way, but she knew that to get anywhere in life in the field she wanted to, she would need to be more ruthless than most if she had any shot of being respected. It’s a well known fact that women are often treated like lesser humans than men in business industries. Unfortunately, it was just how the world worked. So Y/N forced herself to be two people; friendly and warm around her loved ones, stone-faced and immovable around everyone else.

Until Harry.

At first, she had been a bit stand-offish (“a bit” perhaps exceeding the average amount she would normally appear to men- but you can’t blame her. She had built her whole foundations in the business world and now some boy band pop star held the power to make her a laughing stock through every board room in the city.) but that never deterred Harry.

In fact, it only made him even more determined to win her over.

He admired how passionate she was about her career. Just as he loved his own job.

It took several months of flower deliveries, date nights over pesto ravioli (Y/N’s favourite dish from the italian restaurant a couple roads down from her flat) and pining from Harry before Y/N caved into him. One can only reject a long-haired, 6 foot rock star so many times before it becomes self-sabotage.

They both remember that day with the fondest memories, edges fuzzy in their minds like the sepia effects of an old film reel replaying on a loop until the tape unravels, their love for each other being so blindingly obvious.

As usual, Harry had messaged Y/N the day of their date (her number only given to him after the fourth time of him asking and due to Y/N’s both sympathy and thinning patience) wanting to confirm the plans.

Harry: Hi darling. Tonight at 7 still okay with you? H Xx

Y/N: Hi Harry. Yes, 7 is still okay with me. It was yesterday and the day before and still will be today.

Harry: Just making sure. See you soon sweetheart. xx

There were times Y/N felt badly for how she treated Harry, but then she remembers the mocking remarks made by a male colleague at work. (Jeremy, whom she had always despised. His cologne was far too strong for such an enclosed work environment and he manspread in every seat. Gag. As well as having a particular penchant for flirting with every new woman in the office, being offended upon inevitable rejection, and proceeding to more or less make their working lives a living hell. Y/N had first-hand experience of this.) He had somehow found out about Harry trying to woo Y/N, and would make snide remarks mocking her for dating a boy band member.

She wasn’t even officially dating the man, for fucks sake.

Luckily, Y/N had grown quite the thick skin after being around businessmen for the majority of her adult life. She was used to being treated like this, and she decided that some silly remark from a rather unremarkable man was not going to stand in front of her finding happiness. Whether that was with Harry or not.

That night, a knock sounded through Y/N flat as she was lighting a candle in her living room. After a long day under harsh fluorescent office lighting, the last thing she needed was to go home and have to suffer the dreaded big light.

Harry’s bundled-up frame appeared in her doorway, having let himself in with the key he knew she kept under the little cat shaped plant pot by her doormat that simply read “What?”. In one hand he held a bouquet consisting of pink and orange tulips along with wildflowers- Y/N’s favourite- and in the other a plastic bag with the name of his favourite chinese takeaway spot plastered on the side.

“Fancy seein’ you here.” His cheesy grin was framed by two rosy cheeks, nipped with the cold that the Packers beanie covering his curls couldn’t defend him from. “Where’s m’favourite girl?”.

Contrary to Harry’s near obsession with Y/N, he wasn’t talking about her for once. He was talking about Clementine, Y/N’s tiny kitten that she had adopted around the same time as Harry had bumbled his way into her life.

A tornado of charcoal coloured fluff suddenly zips through the living room, bypassing her favourite napping spot on Y/N’s pink velvet couch and beelining straight for Harry’s scuffed Vans (swapped from his normal chelsea boots as he had declared this a chill night in with his girls). “Oh there you are, precious. You’re gettin’ so big! What’s mummy feedin’ you, hm?”

Y/N can’t bring herself to diminish her smile, hers matching the megawatt grin from the smiley boy still in her entryway.

“Am I getting a hello tonight or did you just come over to steal my cat from me?” Her voice is thickly laden with sarcasm, somehow turning the corners of Harry’s mouth up even more until both of his dimples press into his cheeks.

“Oh m’sorry, sunshine. I seem to get more conversation out of Clem sometimes, s’all.” His teasing has an offended pout puckering on Y/N’s lips, “Don’t pout, honey. There’s enough of me to go round. Isn��t that right, Clem? You and your mummy can share my love. Mhm.” He turns his eyes back to the little furball at his feet, ditching the food to the side table by the door in favour of picking her up to cradle to his chest.

“Honest to God. You are so lucky you’re cute, Styles.” She mumbles to herself as she manoeuvres to the food he had abandoned in favour of her kitten, grumbling the whole way to the kitchen and all throughout dishing their plates up.

Harry gasps dramatically, “You hear that, Clemmy? Your mummy thinks I’m cute.” He smirks at Y/N’s grumbling figure, resting the kitten back on the floor to take off his coat and shoes. “Y’need any help, lovie?” he calls over his shoulder, trying to balance while taking his shoes off.

“M’good. You mind getting forks and shit out of the dishwasher? Didn’t have time to take ‘em out before.” She nods to the appliance without taking her eyes off the plates she’s dishing up.

“‘Course, petal. I’ll put these flowers in a vase as well.” As he passes her, he grips her shoulders and plants a kiss on the top of her head, the feel of his touch lingering for far longer than he was actually touching her.

As the two work around each other in Y/N’s slightly cramped, mismatched blue and pink kitchen, she can’t help the feeling that comes over her. It's one of complete comfort. She knows she’s safe with Harry. Knows he would never judge her or hurt her. Knows he truly cares for her. It’s so domestic it almost causes her eyes to well up. She’s never had something like this before; for years, she’s been this stand-offish, fierce businesswoman for fear of appearing weak. But with Harry. With Harry, she can just be Y/N. There’s no need for her to pretend to be someone she’s not. He’s the first person (in a romantic sense) who’s ever been able to handle her personality and not asked her to change.

Y/N appreciates him so much more than he will ever know.

“Saw this new true crime thingy advertisin’ the other day. Know you’re into all that creepy stuff- thought we could watch that, yeah?” Harry’s voice carries over her open living room/kitchen from his place on her pink velvet couch, with his beanie still tucked over his curls and a plate of food in the other, a smile still ever-present on his lovely face.

The sight is so domestic she just smiles and nods. She imagines this for the rest of her life; coming home to him, his guitar on his lap, sheets of half-finished lyrics strewn about the coffee table, his toiletries in her bathroom, his favourite mug next to her own in the cupboard above the sink, his books next to hers on her shelves, sitting down to crappy reality TV and dinner, a sleepy kitten between their warm bodies at night in her blush coloured sheets. She sees it all and it makes her happy. She lets herself be happy.

Now, that date wasn’t monumental. It wasn’t some overpriced dinner in an exclusive London restaurant. But it was special to them. It was the first night Y/N let herself be happy in a long time. They’ve been together- officially- since that night.

If you ask Harry, he’ll probably tell you they’ve been together for longer than that.

Semantics.

Something Harry has discovered throughout their relationship is how much of a secret romantic Y/N truly is.

Their first ever couples holiday together, they decided (rather unconventionally) to visit a tiny town in Ireland. Since the band had gone on their official hiatus, Harry has had an abundance of free time and nothing to do with it, so asked his still good friend Niall if he knew of anywhere quiet and peaceful to fill up some of his time. Him and Y/N whisked themselves away from the city into a small country village where Harry wasn’t recognised but any of the locals- who all happened to be above a certain age lucky for him- and somewhere where Y/N’s office job was the very last thing on her mind.

It was Y/N’s idea to do a ‘screen detox’ as she had called it, so they both popped their phones away, only able to ring in case of emergencies, and spent nearly three weeks bundled up in each other.

Not forgetting Clementine, of course, whom they had brought with them as Harry couldn’t bear the thought of leaving her back home.

“What if she forgets me? I’m her dad, Y/N. I can’t leave my child alone”

His dramatics made her chuckle before she phones the lady whose cottage they were renting for their stay and inquires about the possibility of bringing along a tiny kitten.

The two did nothing but watch TV, eat their body weights in the local cheese selection, read classic novels to each other, and walk along the many country paths surrounding their tiny temporary home.

It was perfect.

As a little souvenir, Y/N picked up a little pebble from her favourite walk that she made Harry take every other day. It was the only path that brought them through a huge glade filled with overgrown grasses and sprouting wildflowers. It was beautiful. And also reminded Y/N slightly of the magical glade from the Twilight films (her not so secret guilty pleasure films that Harry loved to tease her about but would still become far too invested every time she put them on and end up forcing her to watch all of them in one sitting no matter what time of day it was).

The pebble was a smooth charcoal colour (coincidentally the same colour as Clementine’s fur) and had flecks of chestnut brown scattered across its surface- the same shade as the curls Harry still hid under his beanie to keep his ears warm on their country walks.

The minute the couple arrived home from their holiday, Y/N searched through their cupboards vigorously until she found a tiny glass jar. One of those jam jars with the snappy lids and metal closures.

The jar sat pride of place on their fireplace, housing the tiny pebble as a little reminder of a place now special to the couple.

One night, a Friday after a particularly gruelling work week, Y/N had gotten slightly wine drunk and ended up staring at the pebble, her legs slung over Harry's whilst he massaged her calves tenderly and Y/N’s hands nursed an almost empty glass.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Harry’s voice was gentle so as not to disturb her too much.

“Just thinkin’. D’you think it misses home or owt? Kinda just stole him didn’t I. I mean, I miss it there and that was its home, so.” Her words are slightly slurred but affect Harry’s heart all the same.

How could anyone think she was anything other than a great big softie. Here she was wondering if a pebble was feeling homesick.

Instead of teasing her, Harry plays along, “Hmm, I miss it too. Maybe we’ll just have to go back- bring him back a friend.”

She hums at this idea, the wine taking over her brain slightly and sending her off into a pleasant nap on their pink velvet couch, mind fuzzy with love and memories of a tiny cottage in the middle of nowhere.

Y/N’s softness also extended past tipsy comments and pebbles in jars; she had a secret talent for poetry.

She had once admitted to Harry that as a little girl her dream was to be a writer, but she grew up and deemed it too risky, settling into business and stability happily even if it wasn’t necessarily her dream career.

It’s very rare that Y/N lets Harry look at her writing. Only ever if she’s particularly proud of it or if she’s in a supremely chirpy, lovesick mood.

Which would explain why a poem was slipped into his annotated copy of his favourite book that Y/N bought him for christmas and annotated herself, leaving little doodles and notes and highlights everywhere, underlining quotes that reminded her of him and of their relationship. He’s read it countless times, so Y/N knew he would find the poem eventually. It’s on a torn scrap of paper, thick and smooth to the touch so he knows it’s out of her favourite journal that she doesn’t go anywhere without. She must’ve been holding onto this poem for a while.

Industry disruptors and soul deconstructors

And smooth-talking hucksters out glad-handing each other

And the voices that implore,

“You should be doing more”

To you, I can admit that I’m just too soft for all of it

Harry must have read those five lines hundreds of times before he grabs his wallet and puts the piece of paper next to the polaroid he’s kept in there for months. It’s a snapshot from New Years Eve; Harry’s wearing those silly glasses that have the year on them (how they manage to make the year work into glasses every single time he will never understand), Y/N has a pink party hat on and is wearing the biggest smile he’s ever seen whilst holding up a less than amused Clementine, their sparkling tree slightly visible behind Y/N’s head. Their first christmas. The first of many.

The couple fall into a comfortable rhythm with each other, Y/N going to work most days and not getting back until late where she finds Harry humming to himself in the kitchen, perfecting his culinary skills due to his newfound free time.

They work in sync, as soulmates. Twin flames, as Harry’s mum once described them. Always there for each other. Always grateful for each other.

It’s days like this that Y/N is grateful for Harry.

It had been one of those days. One of those weeks. One of those months if she’s completely honest with herself. She had been under so much stress from work that she could barely think of anything other than profit margins, balance sheets, assets, and income statements. Over the past year or so since her and Harry had become official, she had slowly climbed the ranks within the corporation. Something she was indefinitely proud of herself for, but something that also came with a shedload more work to do and seemingly even less time to do it in. When she set out into the business sector, she knew this would be one of the consequences- the seemingly endless amount of paperwork and meetings- but she was exhausted.

It was tiring having to put on this stony, headstrong persona every day.

Her only reprieve was that Harry never expected that of her. Didn’t particularly want her to have to be either. He wanted her in her most natural state; relaxed, overwhelmingly sarcastic, and lying propped up next to him watching Criminal Minds reruns. He would never hold her to the expectations everyone else did. He loved her too much.

Harry knew as soon as Y/N walked -more like stumbled- through the door what kind of day she had had. It was visible in the tenseness of her shoulders, the furrow of her brow, the way she didn’t even acknowledge him as she entered. His poor sweet girl.

He didn’t move from his position on the couch, guitar on his lap and pages of song lyric ideas spread around him like confetti, knowing that she would need a moment to herself before her personal space was invaded anymore than it already had been throughout the day. A huff of frustration exited her pouted lips as she struggled to unbuckle her mary janes, the tiniest problem tipping the iceberg and causing an onslaught of overwhelmed tears gushing from her eyes.

This was what had him springing up from the couch, nearly tripping over himself to get to her on time. “Oh, sweet girl, come here. Had a shit day?”, his tone was gentle and held no teasing- that was the last thing she needed at that moment. Her sniffling and teary eyes seemed to only increase with his words, giving her the metaphorical space she needed to break down in front of him. She knew Harry would never judge her for crying. She could be vulnerable in front of him- not weak, crying did not make her weak. He never expected anything from her. They could just exist in their little bubble of sweet nothings.

“Come on, deep breaths. In and out, there we go. What’s up, honey? What happened? Talk to me.” He knew sometimes she would have off days; days where she didn’t feel like herself, days where she just needed a good cry. But he always made her talk to him about it. He didn’t have any power to control her work problems. If there was nothing he could do apart from listen to her, at least he could do that. His mum had also told him many moons ago that talking about things always helped, and it’s something that’s always stuck with him.

“I just- I’m so-” she manages a few jumbled words between sniffles, huffing frustratedly once again before breathing deeply and getting her words out somewhat fluently, “There’s just so much more shit work that comes with this new promotion. And it’s not that I’m not happy in my job or don’t want it because I love my job! You know I do. I think I just underestimated how much more would be loaded onto me to do in the same time frame as before.” She rubs irritatedly at her eyes, not caring about the mascara she’s probably smushing all over her face. Harry’s seen her in far worse states, so she’s not too fussed.

He nods along with her words sympathetically, rubbing her back delicately and using his other thumb the stroke her knee in soothing patterns, grounding her before she goes on.

“And, and they just want so much from me. We have all these new investors coming in and I am the only woman in my team, so I end up with all the shit work while those guys get off scot free. We do the same fucking job and it just. I don’t want to be whiny but it’s just not fair. I’m normally fine with it- expect it even- but it’s just too much. They're expecting too much from me and I can’t do it.”

At her admission of not being able to do something, Y/N breaks down in another set of tears. She hates not being able to do things. She pushes and pushes herself to be the best she can be, and it’s something Harry has always admired about her. It also means, however, that she holds herself to unreasonable standards that she’s never happy with. Nevermind others setting expectations for her. He hates that she beats herself up over not being good enough. To him, she’s everything.

“Sweet girl, it’s okay. It’s not fucking okay that you get landed with all those dickhead’s paperwork. Not okay at all. But it is okay to admit that you’re struggling. You don’t need to be perfect. You are more than enough. I think you’re everything, sunshine. And if those fuckers can’t see it then bollocks to them. But, Y/N, sweetheart, you don’t need to keep running yourself in circles over not being good enough. God, you’re just the most wonderful person. Everything I’ve ever wanted and more.”

Harry feels his heart break a little bit more when Y/N looks up at him with red-rimmed eyes, tears staining her cheeks, and smudges of mascara across her cheekbones. His thumb comes up to wipe them away whilst she continues to sniffle to herself, “I don’t deserve you, Harry.”

“Stop that bullshit right now. We deserve each other. We love each other. And that’s enough. Couldn’t care less what any big shot executive has to say about you. If nothing else, we have each other. S’all we need, my love” He presses a kiss to each of her slightly damp cheeks, one to her forehead and another to her plush lips, freshly swollen from the amount of crying she’s gone through.

“I love you, H. I know I come across like some stone cold bitch, but I’m just- I’m soft too, you know? Thank you for letting me be that with you.” His heart breaks even more at this, he can’t even bring himself to respond so he just tugs her into his chest and burrows his face into her hair, pressing kisses to the crown of her head and wishing he could just keep her there to protect her from everything big and scary in the world.

He is her home, as she is his.

best song on midnights. i make the rules.

i love these two and i loooove reverse grumpy sunshine

[measuringbliss]

Here's a queer reading of Resident Evil Village chock-full of spoilers. TL;DR: They're all queer.

POV: Two gays (+ Mother Miranda but who cares about her) looking at you, another gay.

So horror is inherently queer right, like horror is about fearing the Other, and you're meant to identify with the vanilla, average Winters family (1 dude, 1 woman, 1 baby aka the perfect developing family) with Ethan in particular acting as the courageous papa bear who'll do anything to protect his kid, and Mia being the nice stay-at-home woman who cooks dinner and reads stories to Rose.

And then the gay agenda Mother Miranda kidnaps Rose.

So let's take a look at her family, shall we?

Lady Dimitrescu is a huge, terrifying monster with claws who hates men and has a bit of a temper. Or, she's a beautiful and incredibly charming lady with lesbian tendencies who's annoyed that a non-queer person invades her safe space and you'd be glad if she stomped on you. Repeatedly.

Heisenberg meanwhile is a sly, shady man awkwardly dressed as a cowboy. Or, he's a leather daddy who finds Ethan's body ~interesting~ and tries to strike an alliance with him and GOD you wish you could accept his offer so that he'd break your bones when he inevitably betrays you. As an aside and I'm sure this doesn't amount to anything (😏) but do you know who became cowboys? Queer people, among others. Getting away from society? Not a very cishet thing to do, nuh-huh. Also, his love of theatrics? His fruity demeanor? Werewolves???? Nah, the dude is queer, no question.

Donna is a creepy woman who loves terrifying dolls. Or, she's a talented dollmaker with niche interests. I'm sorry, tbh I don't care much about her character but I'm sure there's meta out there or something.

Moreau's a big fish man whose behavior is generally grotesque. Or, he's a just pathetic dude who seeks his mother's affection and really, don't we all ?

Anyway so in RE7, the Baker estate is quite respectable in size but not in aspect, and the Baker family mostly behaves like caricatures of rednecks (the voice acting, the father being the authority, the overall crassness of everything, complete with the troublemaker son). Contrasting to this, both the Winters and Miranda's family show nobility.

Ethan, Mia and Rose live in a very nice house and they exude softness in their beginning scene.

Dimitrescu's nobility is more extravagant and imposing, just like herself. She's got that beautiful castle from the Middle Age, her cruelty retains self-control as opposed to her daughters (until the very end where she becomes a very angry dragon, understandably so) whom she very much loves. She's noble, but she's still *queer*. She's still the enemy, the Other.

Heisenberg's nobility doesn't come from a fancy castle, but from a more traditionally masculine aspect: power. He commands the werewolves, his factory is the biggest level of the game–especially if you count the stronghold before that–, like clearly Heisenberg's constantly trying to show he has the biggest, and Dimitrescu is more than happy to challenge his manhood by questioning his authority.

And then, oops... Turns out that Ethan has been queer for a while. He's actually been a fungus for most of the duology. He's been The Other, unconsciously masquerading as The Normal. Eveline (= his subconscious) knew, of course, and she calls him out. Then Ethan returns to "life", makes sure his daughter is safe and grows up to become a BSAA agent, goddamnit Chris!!! and lets the Mold (queerness) take him.

Of course Capcom didn't expect for people to latch onto Dimitrescu (and to a lesser extent, Heisenberg), it's been pretty clear that they didn't expect people to feel anything other than your usual anxiety and maybe fear around her.

The thing is, Dimitrescu's having fun. While Ethan, symbol of normalcy and cishetism, has a hard time getting through the game, she's been absolutely thriving for centuries and doesn't see Ethan as much of a threat for a while. She loves this aura she gives off, she loves her little family (her daughters), she loves scaring "normal people" and generally revels in luxury. Good for her!

Heisenberg is also clearly having fun. He's not a queer man with a tragic backstory who hates himself, nah, he orchestrates his own fun (game night with his werewolf mates with a special guest: Ethan!), he puts on a show and clearly enjoys his theatrics... Look, he's gay. He's a thriving gay, even more than Dimitrescu actually because there's still a certain unease in her, with her strained relationship with Mother Miranda, and the way she has to duck to go through doors in her own castle... Meanwhile Heisenberg is just happy to stir shit up. Gosh, what an icon.

So yeah Resident Evil Village is essentially about how non-queer people feel threatened by queer people, and how the latter have a lot of fun. I don't find the Four Lords creepy at all. They go from pitiful (Moreau) to mysterious (Donna) to absolute bliss to see on screen (Dimitrescu and Heisenberg).

You could also probably make some parallels between Heisenberg's Gay Pack of Gay Werewolves and Chris's Gay Pack of Gay Soldiers that's literally called "Hound Wolf".

The Queers are thriving, folks.

[animereaderinsertwriter]

Cupbearer (Eren/Reader)

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV (in progress)

Warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT (im watching you, if you see this, begone!), vampire!eren, hunter!reader, fem!reader, smut, some amount of predator/prey dynamics but only kinda?? there is also a significant age difference but only cos eren is immortal and all that jazz. we're all adults here. there will eventually be smut.... and do i really need to say that there's gonna be blood in a vampire fic?

Description: A story of falling in love in 4 parts.

Eren is a bad man (well, a bad Creature) who has done bad things. When he meets the great-great-great granddaughter of one of his former friends in his favorite blood bar, however, he thinks it might not matter so much what happened in the past, so long as he can make the future something worth living to see.

Ao3 link here

Part I

A lamb in a den of lions, he thought, watching the newcomer as she settled in, ordering whiskey neat. A fool, for sure.

A fool she may be, perhaps, but even fools could be dangerous. Eren had known that the young woman was a Hunter from the moment she entered the bar (everyone else had, too) but something told Eren that she was hardly cut from the same cloth as the average Bane of Creatures. There was something in her movements— a predatory grace in her stride, perhaps, or a stiff, straight posture, with muscles tensed and ready for action— that betrayed her power to him; but for all that, she really was lovely, and the image of a rabbit caught in a patch of bramble came to mind whenever he looked at her.

Sitting in a corner, drinking his B-neg, he watched the woman as she sipped her drink, checking over her shoulder now and then. She was wary— as anyone with good sense would be— but she didn't appear frightened, and Eren's curiosity was piqued. It wasn't every day that someone so bold happened across his path, and it became harder and harder for him to resist the urge to approach her.

Eventually, Eren gave in to his curiosity— he never had been very good at or even particularly fond of restraining himself— and when he came silently up behind her, the newcomer didn't even notice his presence until he murmured a greeting close to her ear.

"Hello, little love," he said, and she startled in her seat. "Are you lost?"

She turned around then, her eyes big and bright in the dim lighting of the bar, but by the time she managed to look at the spot where Eren would have been, he was already seated on the barstool beside her. Eventually, though, her eyes found his, and when their gazes met, Eren was amused to find no fear in her visage.

"Far from it," she told him, turning her body towards him. "I am precisely where I mean to be."

Eren blinked, nonplussed.

"Curious," he said, leaning forward so that she could see the sharpness of his teeth as he spoke. "Do you fancy yourself a wolf among sheep, little Hunter? Did you really not think we would know you for what you are the moment you crossed the threshold of this place?"

Any normal, human ear would have missed the way her heart leapt in her chest, but Eren missed nothing. The fear he had hoped to inspire in her was present after all, but her face never moved from its impenetrable mask— an affectation that was somehow both soft and steely at once.

"That's not what I'm here for," she told him, widening the distance between her knees as she readjusted on the stool. "I'm here to discover the truth."

The truth— what an odd notion!— and yet Eren sensed no lie in her.

"You're a strange one," he told her, but forced himself to relax his posture to appear lazy, almost drunk. "Most Hunters— even ones so pretty as yourself— shoot first and worry about the truth later. What's your name?"

Her nose crinkled. "It's polite to give your own first."

Sharp, he thought, watching her closely. Names have power.

"Eren Jaeger."

"Eren Jaeger," she echoed, then extended her hand. "My name is (Y/N)."

That name sounded familiar to Eren— and though most names did after living a few centuries, this one seemed to hit closer to home. He knew that name, and knew it well…

"What's your surname?"

(Y/N)'s eyes flashed with an emotion that Eren didn't catch.

"Kirschtein," she replied, averting her eyes. "I'm Jean Kirschtein's great-great-great granddaughter."

And damn if Eren didn't want to laugh. Perhaps his nosiness into the posterity of his old acquaintances really was as bad of an idea as Armin always seemed to imply.

"I see," he said, and he truly, truly did. "Then you know who I am— what I am— and what I've done."

More than that, if she truly did know who he was, it was unlikely that she had come without a specific purpose in mind.

(Y/N) nodded, confirming his suspicions. "I was digging around in my family history and— well— I read what my grandfather wrote, and I just— I wanted the truth."

So wide-eyed, so innocent— so alive. Eren could see now her resemblance to Jean; if they were not similar in looks, she had his sharpness, his humanness… and, as he always had Jean, Eren envied her for it.

"If that's the case, then I'm sure you know that you don't get something for nothing," he told her, sipping his drink just to watch the expression on her face as he let the warm blood slide down his throat. "And that dealings with me can be dangerous."

"Jean Kirschtein loved you, Eren Jaeger," she told him fiercely and with such conviction that Eren nearly choked on his drink. "To take such a tone with me, to threaten me, the last living remnant of him, is the most disrespectful thing I've ever heard."

Eren was about to say that he didn't owe her, Jean Kirschtein, or anyone else any sort of respect, but she plowed on, unwilling to let him say his piece.

"You broke his heart a million ways by doing what you did, but— but he was your friend through all of it, no matter what side each of you were on," (Y/N) continued, passion aflame in her eyes. "I can't even imagine what inspired such a love, such a loyalty from him that he would forgive you for the horrors you caused. That's what I'm here to find out— what you have that a man such as him would find you redeemable."

The reproof in her words stung, but Eren was too old to argue. She could never understand what it was like back then.

"I understand more than you think," she snapped, and Eren actually flinched. "I understand that you hurt the woman my grandfather loved immeasurably, and that he forgave you for that even though he never even particularly liked you. I understand that you were ready to sacrifice the world for that selfsame woman, for Jean, and for all the others. I understand that you're a monster who loved and was loved back, but I want to know why."

How? Eren thought, shaken.

How had she known his thoughts? It was as though she had seen straight through to his innermost being.

Without speaking, she answered his question. (Y/N) took a hand and rolled up her left sleeve, presenting to him a scarred marking in the shape of a pentagram.

"My grandfather didn't settle down with just anyone," she told him, holding his gaze. "I come from a line of powerful witches, all of whom possessed strong claircognizance. Paired with my nature as an empath, you can assume I know what you're going to say before you say it."

Eren hummed, trying to appear less perturbed than he was.

"And yet you hunt Creatures for a living; strange, since you're practically one of us yourself."

(Y/N) glowered. "I hunt monsters that prey on my people, not Creatures. No innocent has died by my hand."

The unlike you went unsaid, but that didn't mean that Eren didn't hear it anyway.

"Don't get high-and-mighty with me, girl," he told her roughly. "Knowing is one thing, but experiencing what we experienced is another."

"I'm not here to judge you," she replied. "I told you, I'm here for truth, nothing more."

"And I told you that the truth doesn't come for free," he told her darkly. "You must give me something in return."

(Y/N) set her jaw.

"What would you have of me?"

It was a mean, base request. Eren was wicked for even thinking it, and vile for wanting it— but looking at the great-to-however-many-degrees granddaughter of a good man that he had once known, seeing the vitality that brought a flush to her cheeks and thumping to her heart, he knew he couldn't pass up this golden opportunity.

It had been so long since he'd had a Companion.

"Become my cupbearer for six moons," he told her, crossing his arms. "Starting with tonight, the moon becomes new; let me drink from you until six of these have passed, and along the way, you will learn what you want to know."

(Y/N) eyed him warily.

"Can you assure my physical safety?"

Eren grunted, almost amused. It was a bit late to be worrying about that.

"I think you know that I can."

"And will you let me continue in my duties as a Hunter?" she asked, her eyes searching his own as if she would find the answer to her question there inside the same eyes he'd had since he was nineteen. "Completely uninhibited?"

"That depends. Will you kill Creatures in the discharge of your duties?"

(Y/N) made a face. Eren had forgotten how expressive mortals could be, but he found that being reminded was not altogether unpleasant.

"You know I will," she replied, "But you have my word that any killing won't be unprovoked."

Eren supposed it was as close to a compromise as he could expect.

"As you wish it, so shall it be."

He turned away, signaling to the bartender for another drink, but a lightning-fast hand shot out to grab his wrist.

"Swear it," she demanded. "I need us to be Bound by it."

The meanness in Eren finally won over. He reached forward, grabbing (Y/N) by the neck, and the silver rings on her fingers burned him as she pulled at his hand to try and restore her breath. Eyes from all around the room were on the two of them— had been, since the very beginning— but it was only once the Hunter before him began to look appropriately humbled that he withdrew.

"Do not touch me without my permission," he said, "And I will return the favor."

(Y/N) looked at him then, but there was still no fear in her eyes. Anger, yes, but no fear.

She must be mad, or foolish one, he thought, considering her for a moment. I always have been partial to mad fools in general, but…

Something about her seemed different, and Eren didn't know what to do other than accept what she had to offer. Heavens knew he was getting the better end of the deal anyway.

"Swear it," she repeated, this time more quietly. "Give your word, and I will be your cupbearer."

Eren brought his hand up and unbuttoned the top three buttons of his shirt. At his will, the nail tip of his forefinger sharpened, hardening into a point; he used it to draw an 'X' onto the skin just over where his heart rested inside his chest, cold and dead. Blood welled into the cut— precious little, compared to that of a human, but still enough to run down his chest in smudges— and it was by that blood that he swore. He spoke the terms of their agreement, then took the blood from his wound with the pad of his finger and marked the same spot over (Y/N)'s own heart.

"Satisfied?" he asked, their faces almost touching, and (Y/N) shivered.

"Yes."

Her warm, living breath fanned over his face with her reply, and Eren took the moment to close his eyes and appreciate the scent and sensation of it.

"You may think you're satisfied," he told her, pulling away, "But you don't know the meaning of the word."

She eyed him warily, but before she could speak, he added, "In six months' time, I'll ask you the same question, and it is then that you will truly know what it is to feel satisfied— satiated in every way."

"As you say."

It was a throwaway comment, nothing more than a dismissal, really; but Eren felt like it was the start of something truly remarkable.

[adhd-hippie]

FUCK ABELISM

Things I experienced today as a Special Education Paraeducator

1. I told one of the people that I work with that I'm really grateful that the teaching certification program I'm going to is only 1 year because I couldn't have done another 2 years of college, I barely made it through my BA which took me 6, and that I had to do another 2 I'd have dropped out. She insisted that I'd have been fine.

So, I reminded her that I have ADHD and that doing my BA was extra hard because of my ADHD. I explained that I was changing majors all the time as well as schools. She told me "all young people do that," I told her I attended college between the ages of 20 and 26 much older than your average student. She repeated that it wasn't my ADHD it was just because I was young.

She's wrong, it absolutely was due to my ADHD, you don't repeat classes because you don't understand the course work just because "you were young" you also don't impulsively change schools because you're tired of the one you're at because "you were young." You also don't almost flunk classes because you couldn't do your final paper because it was too much work in one chunk and you waited too long to get started because "you were young"

Like fuck off Karen (that's her actual name) and shut the hell up your opinion has no bearing on my lived experiences.

2. Same bitch insisted that the kid with CP whom I've been working with for 4 months couldn't have deliberately refused to eat solid foods until I informed him that his mom told me he could eat solids and I would no longer be blending his food because "his brain doesn't work like that, he's not capable of premeditation".

Like really Karen, REALLY. Because first of all Cerebral Palsy is a PHYSICAL disability and while some people with CP do have cognitive disorders there is nothing in this student's file to indicate that he does. Not to mention that while he's not capable of speech he is completely capable of following directions and answering grade-level reading questions.

So you're telling me that a 3rd-grade boy didn't think he would get away with not chewing (something that's physically challenging but important for him to do) as long as he could because he had a new teacher who didn't know better just because he has a PHYSICAL disability? That's what you're telling me?

3. Overheard her comparing her Autistic nephew to Rainman and talking about him as if he was 10 when I asked how old he was she informed me he's 47.

This bitch is getting a teaching degree with a special education endorsement, she wants to teach Special Education...like WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK!

She seems to think that because she works in sped and likes kids with special needs she'll make a good special education teacher but no bitch FUCK NO!

You can't just like special needs kids, you have to ADVOCATE for them, you have to treat them as EQUALS, you have to respect their autonomy, and you have to see them as INDIVIDUALS capable of complex thought and motivations.

Just fuck you, Karen, no wonder kids hate school, and no wonder adults leave special education with horror stories if this is the kind of mother fucking cunt getting teaching positions.

Sidebar: This absolute fuck nugget always acts like I'm some kind of whiny ass child for talking about my ADHD because I relate ADHD to everything because you know, ADHD kinda affects every fucking part of my fucking life, like ya know fucking A DISABILITY.

Also, she constantly reminds me she's been working with special needs kids for 15 years. Yet fails to acknowledge or respect that I've been working with special needs kids longer. You see I've been working with autistic kids SINCE I WAS 11.

I started as a recess companion for an Autistic kid in another class in my elementary school (the school I now work at). I would walk with him at recess and make sure he stayed on school grounds so he could pace and stim as needed.

In Jr. High and High School, I was a TA in the Sped classrooms. In Jr. High I also started babysitting for a family with two Autistic boys, soon I was babysitting for 4 different families with Autistic children. This went on for TWENTY YEARS until the kids were self-sufficient enough to no longer require babysitters or even caregivers.

I then went to work as a representitive payee, working with cognitively disabled adults helping them to manage their SSI, making sure they were budgeting getting their food, paying rent etc. That was 2 years of my life. The last two years have been spent going to school to get my teaching certification in special education while working as a para in special education.

All told I have roughly 25 years of experience working with people with disabilities of all ages, yet for some reason, this woman can't respect me.

Like is it because I only have 2 years as a para? Is it because I took the faster cheaper route to do the same thing you're doing slower and paying more for? Like what is it bitch, what the fuck is wrong with me that you don't respect me as a disabled adult who knows some shit about working with people with disabilities?

I HAVE LITERALLY LIVED MY LIFE IN THIS WORLD why doesn't that count for anything?

[mm2305]

Meet my MC : More about the past

{Meet my MC here}

A/N : For the @openheartfanfics MCs past entries

-> Hometown, origin, family relationships.

Olivia was born and raised by a middle class family, in Long Beach, California.

Her parents, Anne and Nick, are American and Greek-British respectively. Both of them made sure that she and her sister, Lily, had knowledge about their cultural identities and grew up in a home that held traditions from all the countries they came from. One of them being a Greek one (although not strictly followed these days) by naming their firstborn after a grandparent. In this case, her paternal grandmother, Alexandra.

Olivia has always gotten more along with her dad. Seeing as he is a high school teacher, he knows how to work with kids but also helped Olivia through a phase in her teenage years that she did not really know what she wanted to do. She had always been on a steady course of action and for a long time she had thought she was going to go UCLA and major in English Literature or Music. After an accident that Lily had and seeing the whole new world of medicine, she was conflicted. It was her dad who helped her sort through her thoughts and feelings and urge her to do anything that would truly make her happy. He also made sure to assure her that nothing was set in stone, since she had time to change and rethink everything. It was then that Olivia decided that for once she would go out of her comfort zone and go to a university far away from home. Johns Hopkins.

Her mom and her were on mostly good terms. The main point of argument was that Anne was quite overprotective over her children, resulting to many fights, especially in her teenage years. They grew closer when Liv moved out to go to college and learned to trust her more.

Lily and Olivia were and remain very close. With the average 4 year difference between them and the characteristic stubbornness they both had, fights during their childhood were common. However, they always made up and were there for each other. They are the best of friends and closest of confidants.

She had a special connection to her grandmother Alexandra. A great part of the woman Olivia grew up to be is because of her and for that she remains forever grateful. More information on their relationship here.

-> Academics / Studies

Liv's academic performance had always been stellar. She has an innate curiosity to learn new things and a sharp mind, even as a child. At the age of 6 she started having piano lessons and from the age of 13 till 17 she even played for some concerts and competitions. Combined with the good singing voice she had, many thought she would study Music in the future. With her moving out and university, she didn't have the time and energy to go back to playing, so it was put in the back for a few years. She had a great academic performance throughout school and university. In her opinion, it's all because of her meticulous planning, yet her professors would say that it's difficult to meet a student that perceptive these days.

-> Romantic Relationships

Romance and love have never been on the forefront of Liv's mind as she was always focused on studying and working, so before her husband Ethan, she had been in two serious relationships.

The first one was with her high school classmate Rob. They stayed together for the senior year in high school and another 1,5 years after that in a long distance relationship. Eventually they both decided that it could not work for them anymore this way and remain, to this day, in friendly terms.

Her other relationship was with Adrian, whom she met in medical school. They bonded over their love for medicine and stayed together for 1,5 years. What made them break up in the middle of the last year in med school, was the fact that neither of them could compromise about the issue of their residencies. Olivia wasn't willing to be in another long distance relationship and neither of them would agree to applying to a different hospital, so they could be together. Neither of them regrets their decision.

-> Her personality while growing up

Olivia as a child (and as an adult) was curious and cheerful. Kind, friendly and with a great love for animals. Quite talkative and lively, but only with those she trusted. Up until a certain age, she wasn't spontaneous at all. She enjoyed planning and feeling like having control over her surroundings, but as she grew up, she realized that some things are beyond her control. Still, she remains meticulous and loves organization even now.

She has grown to be more assertive and confident and setting boundaries for people and choosing who she will trust and let in, as a result of some past school experiences. Seeing as she was a good student and kind - even to those that didn't deserve it - many of her classmates took advantage of her and by the time she realized it she was deeply miserable by her false friendships. With the help of her family, she understood that the first person she should take care of, respect and be kind to, is herself. So she started doing that and cut out the toxic people from her life, while learning to do better by herself. This happened when she was 17 and was a life changing experience for her.

[wildfire317s-oc-box]

Name: Nijiko Karasu

Species: Demon

Hair Color: Originally black with color shifting ends that go through the rainbow in the right light but after becoming a demon it turned white and shifted color all throughout

Hair Style: Very Long and is usually worn down even her bangs which tend to hang over her face

Eye Color: originally a dark purplish-blue but after becoming a demon they became very bright royal purple

Skin Color: undead pale

Age: 15

How long shes been a demon: 10 years by the end of season one

Nickname: Little Song Bird, Little Crow, Pale Phoenix (only called this by abusers or demon slayers), Niji (for short)

Fashion Sense: Her outfit is generally pretty basic with various shades of purple but she does have a brown belt and hip bag which she may or may not have snagged from one of the guys.

Height: 4'8

Sexuality: Bi leaning towards girls

Strength: as a human she was very weak, timid and suicidal, but after becoming a demon she grew bolder and braver and while still being somewhat self-sacrificial was less likely to let herself get killed on purpose. (When she was human her blood bordered on rare and average) physically shes a little weaker than kyogai was.

Her Story: Her life was very sad, Her mother died giving birth to her and she was born into a family of an abusive father and seven older sisters, all of whom hated her and forced her to do the most work and take the worst punishments. While her father forced all of her sisters to work and punished them as well he was harder on her for two reasons, one being she was supposed to be a boy and the other being that he believed she was solely responsible for her mothers death (pushing his blame onto her). Her sisters hated her because she was the kindest and prettiest out of all of them despite what she went through. Her father was one of the few people who bred and sold kasugai crows, even though she did most of the work and eventually all of the work after a while. Years passed and her father married off all of her sisters in exchange for money to feed his assorted addictions, and he re-married to a woman who was just as bad if not worse then he was meanwhile he found a young man (about 20) from a rich family to marry her off to however he was even lazier and more aggressive than her father but before she would be married off the young man wanted to make sure she would cater to his every beck and call.

She lived her 15 years of life constantly being taken advantage of, bullied, having the voice she prided herself on insulted and dealing with all kinds of ungrateful behavior. That is until one night after being beaten for not "finishing tilling and weeding the garden" even though she had, and then got her gardening shovel tossed into the woods and locked out of the house. Despite living with this behavior her whole life she knew it was not normal and as she walked into the woods to find her shovel bleeding slightly, she grumbled about her bad luck loud enough to draw the attention of a demon who lived in a small mansion not to far into the forest who upon finding her picked her up and carried her off back to the mansion. Eventually after being carried around the mansion she was set down as the one who had taken her argued her fate with two others who were living with him, instead of running however she patiently waited on the floor, only cutting in to asked them if there was anywhere she could wash herself off so she wouldn't be all gross covered in sweat and dirt and if they could hurry up their argument before anyone noticed she was gone. This request understandably shocked the three demons enough to pause their argument going completely silent mid-way through their respective sentences and turn to give her the "what the fuck" look in unison. When the one who's name she heard to be Kyogai asked her if she was going to try to escape her response was "hmm let me think, go back to my already horrible life and delay the inevitable or die like i have been wanting to for the last ten years? Yeah i think I'm going to stay" thus prompting the question "what the hell??" from all three, her response was "Well the way I see it if I do leave right now my life is going to go either one of three ways, one get beaten to death by either my ungrateful father or even less grateful future husband at some point in time like three of my sisters, get worked to death by either my father or my future husband like my mother and two of my sisters, or be married off for money in three years to someone who cant be bothered to even learn my name, survive maybe another fifty years of abuse and constant stress only to die of something stupid in my sixties and probably be left to rot in the garden like a rat after being defiled one last time either way, at-least if i die here i will die to people who are gentlemen in comparison and are at-least grateful to have me as a meal", causing all three of them to just stare at her before Kyogai informs her that the wash room is just down the hall and asking to speak with the other two alone.

As soon as she entered the wash room, the three went back to deciding her fate but now instead of figuring out who would eat her they were instead trying to figure out a way to keep her around without sending her home as they all agreed they would feel bad hurting her but even worse sending her back, at first thinking to keep her as a sort of pet but eventually coming up with the idea to get her turned into a demon. Upon going to knock on the wash room door to let her know what they decided; the largest one heard her siren like voice starting to sing "Itsumo nando demo/ Always with me" as she washed herself and went to get the others to come listen saying "you two have to hear this" and they quickly found themselves listening to her through the door until song was over. Once she was out, she first received the first genuine complements about her voice and in general she had received in her life and then was told that she was not going to die but she was not going to be sent home either and that instead they were going to keep her and see if she could become like them. After reading Kyogai's mind for about a week and deciding to see what the big deal was, Muzan payed them a visit and after watching her for a while he turned her into a demon after she had fallen asleep. The next time she woke up she found her hair had turned white, her eyes had turned bright purple, her teeth and nails had become sharp and pointed, she had sprouted a pair of white wings on her back and small patches of small white downy feathers over her body. This both surprised and relieved her three housemates when they found her as she attempted to flutter around the room she had been sleeping in.

As a demon she stalked the night hunting down anyone in the nearby towns who dared to abuse their spouses/future spouses or children in any way. Years into the future she was the only in the mansion left alive because she had been sleeping quietly in the only room that was left unchecked. She found her roommates remains and put on their clothing as a way to keep them with her. When Tsuki came looking visit with them not long after they died while on her way to visit the spider family, Nijiko was the only one tsuki found and had to be the one to explain what happened, not long afterwards she was picked up by Usagi-sama and taken to live in the mountain. She developed the ability to mimic peoples voices and various other noises as well as self harmonize at a young age since she spent so much time with the crows. She tends to avoid the kamaboko squad with the exception of nezuko, the few times they do visit the mountain, but if they do cross her path the most they will get out of her is a glare and an annoyed huff, which confused them until they noticed just who's clothes she was wearing, so if they ever want to say anything to her or she wants to say anything to them (she usually doesn't start a conversation) either Tsuki or one of the crows will have to act as the messenger between them.

When she was younger she would occasionally hear songs and shows from other countries from people who had been traveling to different places around the world, and even after she became a demon she would occasionally go into the towns and hear new ones that she would come home singing. The Kasugai Crows that she raised all have a habit of referring to her as their mother and she could tell the differences between all of them, funnily enough the parents of both Tanjiro and Inosuke's crows are part of this group as some of her last hatchlings. Most of the current Hashira's crows are the children of her little hatchlings with the exception of Giyuu's who was one of her mothers when she was alive and she is very proud of all of them. If she ever feels like it she can and will give herself a beak, but she usually doesn't. She is rather fond of kids, so had she gotten woken up that day when her roommates got killed; she would have been very nice to the younger siblings of the kid who got taken, helped them go look for him and she would have been very cross with the guys especially kyogai as he was the one who did the kidnapping and scolded them while shoo-ing the kids (tanjiro, zenitsu and inosuke included) out of the house with a broom and then upon figuring out why what happened happened she would've comforted kyogai and reminded him that he doesn't need to prove himself to anyone and told them that dinner was on her once the sun set. Like she walks in on tanjiro and kyogai's fight just before the beheading dragging her other two roommates by the ear with one hand and dragging inosuke and zenitsu by the ear with the other with the kids following behind giggling and pulls a "if you two don't stop fighting right now I SWEAR" stopping the fight in its tracks because none of her roommates have ever heard her that mad before and the last time any of them heard that specific tone of voice was when their respective mothers were scolding someone and know that it is a tone to be feared, being like "Kyogai I need to have a word with you and these two privately" "But Niji -" "Don't you ""But Niji"" me" as she is just herding the humans out of the house. She and Kyogai are essentially the adults/parents of the house but she is most definitely the mom of the entire group. She occasionally perches on the shoulders of her more sturdy roommates like an actual crow. She definitely has crow brain and will bring home any random shiny or interesting objects she finds while she is out running around and occasionally "gift" whatever it is to her roommates. Since becoming a demon she has also learned to mimic voices she has heard atleast twice and has learned to throw her voice in unison with the siren song ability. She LOVES pranking people especially the kamaboko squad. She hates to admit it but she has grown rather fond of zenitsu specifically.

Abilities:

Blood demon art: siren song and siren song self harmonize: this allows her to use her voice as a sort of hypnosis but with self harmonize it sounds like there are multiple voices in a perfect harmony and makes the hypnosis stronger. (This would probably really freak zenitsu out) (since the deaths of her roommates the extra voices during self-harmonize sound like their voices so she feels like they are still there)

Blood demon art: dazzling dance: this speeds her up and distracts her opponent, its basically dance fighting but with the way her hair and feathers work, the light reflecting different colors off of them would distract her opponent.

Blood demon art: flying feathers: this allows her to summon her lost feathers as projectile weapons that will scratch her opponent enough to bleed

Blood demon art: fire flight: with this she flys up into the air sets herself on fire and aerial dives at her opponent as a sort of kamikaze attack.

Blood demon art: crow form: after a while of hanging out with asaki, kiki and tsubaki she learns this blood demon art which allows her to turn into a white crow with the same color refracting effect that her normal forms hair and feathers do

Could/Does get along with:

Canon: Haunted Mansion Trio, Spider fam, Kamanue, Mukago, Rokuro, Enmu, Gyutaro, Daki, Akaza, Nakime, Nezuko, Tamayo, Mitsuri, Rengoku, Zenitsu

O.C's: Tsuki, Asaki, Kimi, Kiki, Usagi, Maka, Mine, Kuroko, Tsubaki, Rin, Takara

[griffelkinn]

All the Transwomen I Met

I've felt the need to write this and share it, for a few years.

About 5 years ago, I moved to San Francisco. I didn't know anyone in the entire state, so I spent a lot of time and effort meeting new people, and going to social events, and accepting invitations from most everybody who invited me to anything. I met a ton of people.

When I moved out there, I didn't really know anything at all about transgender people. I was told about that idea pretty quick once I got there. I thought it was really great that people were comfortable being themselves. The idea that men who enjoyed wearing stereotypically "women's" clothes, were becoming more comfortable doing that. And the idea that men were rejecting stereotypes of men that were forced onto them from childhood, so they could be themselves without shame. And the reverse... women rejecting uncomfortable stereotypes of women so they could be happy. It was an exciting idea that if more and more people started doing this, it would become more and more obvious that none of the stereotypes about what women are like and men are like are actually real. Sexism would be almost completely done away with!

I wish that was what happened. I was really excited to see it happen.

But that isn't what happened. Something bad happened.

In San Francisco, there were a LOT of transwomen. And so while I was meeting all of those people, and doing all that socializing, I ended up meeting and becoming acquaintances with a lot of transwomen. I have written a brief description of literally every single transwoman who I became friends with or got to know at all. I left none out. There are nine. I have felt like this was very important for me to share.

The first transwoman (man who likes to be called a woman) I knew, rubbed his penis on me when he thought I was sleeping. This was shortly after I told him I didn't return his romantic feelings for me, which I had told him many times already.

That same man had previously told me that he'd spent most of his young adult life pressuring girls to have sex with him.

The second transwoman I knew, became enraged when I casually commented on sexism in commercials. I thought what I said would be met with obvious agreement. I hadn't known many transwomen yet, and I thought that they would understand sexism and feminism a little more than men on average do. I learned that I was very wrong. I'd commented on how a string of commercials we watched featured men speaking with intelligence, confidence, and authority, and they featured women speaking in forced baby voices, sounding insecure, dumb, giggly, and weak.

This man advanced on me physically to where I was sitting, with another angry transwoman, very loud and mad, and was very upset with my comment. He said women like talking like that, and also their vocal cords physically are only able to talk like that. Then he said my comment could be compared to women who really want to wear high heels to work, but people don't let them. Which is obviously ridiculous, because that is exactly the opposite of reality... women are being forced by their workplaces to wear high heels, which most women hate and which injure feet. That is still a sexist reality in many places that women are fighting to end. He was somehow saying I was like the fantasy people who don't let these fantasy women wear high heels to work, because of my comment.

This same man told me that he was really respected in China, which is where he was born, because he's a woman and in China women are dominant and considered superior to men. That is true, isn't it. Yes, very accurate. Not at all incorrect or literally opposite of reality.

The third transwoman I knew got upset with me at Halloween season, when I commented that women should be offered normal costumes just like men are, rather than only "sexy" versions of costumes in most places. There should be the same options for girls and boys, and women and men. He immediately disagreed and would only repeat that "Women like wearing sexy costumes!" I repeated that girls and boys should both be offered normal costumes, and obviously if anyone, man or woman, wanted to wear a "sexy" version of a costume they should wear whatever they want. He still disagreed. He said that "women have very little opportunity to dress femininely and sexy, and Halloween is a chance they can do it." I explained that was the opposite of reality. Women have tons of times when they are allowed, encouraged, and pushed to dress femininely and "sexy". That includes work, after work, weekends, and... all other times I would say. I'm pretty sure he was thinking of men, for whom his comment would have been accurate.

That same man got very angry when I said women were made to feel they have to wear makeup, and that is bad. He became very angry. Not just a little. Very angry. He kept saying (angrily) "Women like wearing makeup!"

That same man told me he was a pedophile, and had to keep himself away from children.

That same man told me that "sexism is good for some women".

That same man supported Gamergate. That same man told me that the separation of women's and men's sports are not at all related to people's biological sex, and that men who want to be called women should compete in women's sports.

That same man told me that sexism doesn't exist at all in America, and people are treated exactly the same their whole lives whether they're female or male. (I know, it contradicts his other statement that "sexism is good for some women"). I said that I had a lifetime of many many instances where I experienced sexism. From when I was very little until the present. He mockingly told me to name just one. I was so horrified that he honestly thought I would be unable to think of a single experience of sexism, and that he was mocking me about it, that I told him that it would demean me to answer to his demand of one example. It would obviously be lowering myself too far.

That same man told me that sexism in countries outside America don't have any effect on me.

The fourth transwoman I knew, I saw a movie with. It was good, but I noticed some very obvious sexism in the portrayal of female characters and male characters, which I later learned most everybody noticed. And while most everybody including me agreed it was a great movie, the extreme sexism was obvious. After the movie I said so, how I loved it - but it was very sexist in these examples. And this man started insulting me and being very annoyed. He said venomously that the portrayals of female and male characters was "realistic", and then just as venomously asked me "What are you, a FEMinist?" Clearly he felt the only acceptable view of feminists is to hate them. Somehow he expected me to want to insist to him that I wasn't a feminist. Obviously I loudly said "Yeah. I am a feminist. Aren't you a feminist?"

I never saw him again. We had been casual friends for a few months, but apparently that interaction made us both lose the desire to try and meet up again.

That same man, weeks previously at a fast food joint, told me ever since he started taking estrogen that he's become extremely physically weak. He was grinning while describing to me how wonderfully weak he was, and clearly that was an idea that made him very happy. A personal fantasy. He said how now his arms are so weak, he can barely throw a frisbee! I asked him to arm wrestle and he beat me with no effort in one second. I'd assumed that would happen.

The fifth transwoman I knew, was a very nice person. He was kind, and fun, and not a misogynist, and didn't get angry if anyone criticized anything sexist. He also didn't mind going into men's public bathrooms. I really liked him. We were friends.

The sixth transwoman I knew was over six feet tall, and had a fantasy that men would rape him. He would only ever dress in cartoonishly sexual stripper-style outfits. He described multiple times to me how he was worried that men would rape him when he walked around in public. In a voice and level of description that made it obvious this was his personal sexual fantasy. He suggested that he and I are both equally in danger from sexual assault. I'm 5'1 and just trying to live my life. He was over 6 feet and that was his sexual fantasy. We were very different in our experiences of the threat of sexual assault.

The seventh transwoman I knew, I went to the movies with and he put his hand in my crotch area. I said "WHOA I am not comfortable with that." And I physically took his arm and returned it to his own seat. He immediately put his arm around my neck and shoulders and said in an annoyed whiny voice "Well can I at least do this?" And I had to say no again. We barely knew each other, and were not at all romantic. I had zero romantic thought of him. He clearly didn't care or consider if I did or not. It didn't affect his feelings that he should be allowed to do things like that for his pleasure.

The eighth transwoman I knew was over six feet tall and white. He came up to me suddenly and told me that he is twice as oppressed as me, because he has sexism, as a woman, like I do, and he also has "transmisogyny". I was so shocked that he would say he experiences sexism like women that I was speechless. Obviously he was a man and so he did not. He was also gigantic. I don't really know why he wanted to come up to me and tell me that he had "twice as much oppression as me". After he said it he just kind of looked at me waiting to see what I would say. That was the first instance I learned about the "oppression olympics". I had never used the word "oppression" before and very rarely heard it used in person. But I was disgusted by his competitive declaration of victimhood. Since then, of course the word "oppression" has become extremely popularly used in conversation, and that's usually a good thing, but there is definitely this unsavory world of people like him who build their identities around having the "most" oppression, like an impressive commodity, who have no basis in reality.

That same man, after my lack of response, then told me that he also doesn't have white privilege because he grew up poor.

That same man told me that he'd spent much of his life pressuring women to have sex with him.

The ninth transwoman I knew, told me he would only ever date women who shave their bodies. I know that men have no idea the level of pain and insecurity that teenage girls go through because of the forced shaving culture, so I gave him a break and replied with a kind of friendly comment that even though shaving their bodies for women is an extremely torturous social norm, everyone has preferences about their romantic partners and that's fine. Though I felt like that particular preference is specifically a preference for women suffering an unhealthy lifelong ritual born completely out of insecurity. I figured I'd just write this guy off, and there was no point in saying so. But I couldn't help poking the misogynist bear a little. He was trying to get me to hang out with him. So I asked if he just won't have a relationship with a woman who doesn't shave her body, or if he can't even stand to see them at all in any setting. Because it was summer and I love going to the beach in shorts, and I needed to know if I shouldn't invite him to to beach. I actually thought I was being funny and that he would know that, but he answered seriously that he "would feel grossed out if he looked at me." Imagine one person feeling comfortable telling someone that they would feel grossed out to look at you. That man sure felt comfortable saying it to me.

I have also known some transmen. They are usually very kind, thoughtful people. I have known some very closely for years before they decided to be transmen. Most of them, years after that decision, still fight internally against the feeling that they have to wear makeup every day or else be ugly and worthless. Most of them still mentally fight to nurture any sense of self-confidence to speak their opinions, or take up space in a group as a full person, who deserves as much free immediate respect as any other.

Those are things that women experience.

Almost all transwomen are now saying that they are not men breaking social expectations. They are women. And women are sexist stereotypes.

Men breaking social expectations would deserve respect and props for being themselves despite social pressure. That would be a cool move. But they are instead insulting women, supporting sexist stereotypes religiously, closing down women's shelters, women's rape trauma centers, and women's festivals. They are taking women's government positions, women's scholarships, and women's awards.

**CONTENT WARNING for below **

Transwomen have made it so now any and all men are allowed to go into women's bathrooms, women's changing rooms, and women's shelters. And MANY of them have been raping and murdering children and women. They've been kidnapping, videotaping, and sexually harassing women and children.

There are many myths that transgender activists send around social networking sites. There's one that is very popularly shared that says transwomen in America are in danger of being murdered. That is a lie. White transwomen in America are less likely to be murdered than white men who don't identify as a transwomen.

Even if they were in danger, that would be a separate issue from women completely, and they would deserve their own safe places to be and escape violence. They should not take away all resources to help women, and allow all men into women's changing rooms and bathrooms and prisons.

I'm pretty sure most people know that women are not allowed to talk about this. We are not allowed to speak our discomfort. If a woman says she is uncomfortable with any of that, transwomen (men) bombard her with rape threats, very descriptive rape threats involving their own penises. They also do this to any lesbian who says lesbians don't want to have sex with penises. Any woman who is a feminist. Any woman who wouldn't even call herself a feminist because that word takes a lot of courage to use, but who still speaks of helping women and ending sexist beliefs, or describes reality without pandering to make these men feel good.

I used to think the transgender social movement would bring us all leaps and bounds into a brighter future, but I really think it has dragged us all back far in time and rolled back women's rights and safety and respect many decades into the past. I used to think all those violent women-hating transwomen were just the rare bad apple, and most are good people who don't want to hurt women. But that list of transwomen that I described is every single one I've known in person. 8 out of 9 were extreme examples of the most misogynist of men. My experiences have made me wary now, and I can barely even picture in my imagination a transwoman saying the words "It's impossible to feel like a woman", or "Women deserve to be allowed to get together and talk about women's issues".

The misogynist slur TERF means: Dyke. Feminazi. Cunt. They all know this.

It pains me to see women being caught up in this social movement, clearly just trying to be polite and "politically correct", or seeking male approval. Most of them are insecure. I understand. But I wish they would speak up and be honest about the truth, and not just do whatever these men tell them they must do and say to avoid being called a TERF.

[chicagocityofclans]

Ella Greene → Jodie Comer  → Hyena

→ Basic Information

Age: 28

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Bisexual

Born or Made: Made

Birthday: October 30th

Zodiac Sign: Scorpio

Religion: Agnostic

→ Her Personality

Ella is, and always has been, ruthlessly ambitious when it comes to the things she wants. She is the kind of person you regret getting in the way of. She’s almost always successful in whatever she does. This is partly thanks to her drive, partly thanks to her organisational and planning skills and partly because there isn’t much she’s not willing to do. She is hardworking and pushes herself past her limits on a regular basis. Thanks to this she is also intelligent and skilled in her field of work.

Outside of herself she can be incredibly supportive of people and loving in her own way. Who she chooses to support and why can sometimes be a mystery to anyone else but her. Those that don’t get her support fall into one of three categories - those that she simply doesn’t bother with, those she can use for something and those that have gotten on her bad side. Those that fall into the third group are people who she will go out of her way to tear down. She is vindictive and holds a grudge like a world champion.

→ Her Personal Facts

Occupation: Mechanical Engineer

Scars: the bite mark on her side where she was turned

Tattoos: None

Two Likes: Chinese food and Working out

Two Dislikes: Slobs and Being bored

Two Fears: Being take advantage of and Heights

Two Hobbies: Inventing and Rowing

Three Positive Traits: Driven, Organised, Supportive

Three Negative Traits: Selfish, Vindictive, Possessive

→ Her Connections

Parent Names:

Rupert Greene (Father): Rupert died when Ella was quite young. She remembers him as a funny and loving man.

Gabriella Reed (Mother): There was no love loss between Ella and her mother. She was a strict and controlling woman who Ella was convinced was physiologically abusing her brother. She didn’t mourn her after her death.

Charles Reed (Step-father): Charles seemed like an ok person but Ella never really bothered with him, even as a child.

Sibling Names:

James Reed (Brother): Ella sees a lot of herself in her younger brother apart from the fact he has a lot more control over his bad qualities than she does. She loves him in her own way and often goes to visit him. She also sends him money to help with the raising of their youngest brother.

Edward Reed (Brother): She’s quite fond of her youngest brother, seeing him as better than she is. She often sends him gifts and visits when she can.

Children Names:

None.

Romantic Connections:

Russel Jordan (Attraction): Ella hasn’t had much one on one time with Russel. He seemed intimidating at first but the more Ella saw of him the more comfortable she became around him. She finds him attractive and intelligent but is unsure if it'll go further than a small crush.

Platonic Connections:

Gretchen Sims (Friend): Gretchen was the one Ella allied herself with shortly after she was turned. She can see that she is the one to lead the clan at this time. Gretchen’s similar story and relaxed personality sealed the deal, as did her hatred for Joan.

Silas Moebius (New Friend): Silas and Ella were both changed against their will recently and have bonded over that experience. Though Silas doesn’t know who changed him, they share anger over their lives being fully disrupted and pulled out of their control.

Nada Rajui (Friendly): With his position in the clan Ella made a point of introducing herself as soon as she could.  She respects him and since he’s supportive of Gretchen, she’s supportive of him. He and his fiancee have invited her to their house for a barbecue, but she hasn’t attended one yet.

Raja Lankala (Friendly): Ella liked Raja the second she met her. She appreciates that she’s a strong, independent woman at the top of her field. Raja has reached out to her and invited her to the weekly barbecues that Nada and Raja host at their home. She hasn’t taken them up on the offer, but might soon.

Ben Nile (Friendly): Ben allowed her to stay at his and Gretchen’s place when she was first turned and having difficulty getting adjusted with her shifting. They haven’t talked much since then, but he was always kind to her.

Juliette Willott (Acquaintances): Juliette and Ella have only met a couple of times. Their jobs don’t really cross over much, and Juliette always seems to be running after a child. That being said the few times they’ve interacted, mostly when Raja connected the two, she liked what she met.

Jin Asato (Acquaintance): Interestingly, Jin was the first person whom Ella met from the clan. They both attend the same gym and regularly visit during the same times, even before she became a hyena. They still see each other at the gym after her change, and he’s explained how they can burn off the frenzy by exercising as well as partaking in the substances the rest of their clan enjoys so much.

D.W. Colt (Acquaintance): D.W. recently reached out to Ella about her change. She is a Victim’s advocate and was hoping to get Ella’s story in order to try and end the non-consensual changes that plague Clan Hyena. She didn’t write the woman off, but she isn’t sure if she wants to step up and take on that responsibility.

Monty Wilders (Acquaintance): Monty was the cop who responded to her attack. Ella found it pretty enraging that there was nothing they could do to Joan and hasn’t run into the cop since then.

Hostile Connections:

Joan Hislop (the one who turned her): Joan was a work friend who decided she was going to turn Ella to gain support for her clan leader bid. Ella hates her for it and has vowed to ruin her life.

Luke Bowick (Unsure): Luke’s general demeanor often reminds her of Joan. There is something shifty about him that she doesn’t trust. She would have fully written him off if he hadn’t been such a good friend of Gretchen’s. Ella has made the decision, however, to avoid being alone with him whenever possible.

Pets:

None

→ History

Ella was born in a small town a few hours drive from Chicago to a seemingly normal middle class family. They were human, as she was back then too. Her memories of her early years are faint but happy. She remembers her father laughing at her jokes, playing with her and her younger brother, James, and always smiling. Her mother doesn’t feature in many of these memories.

When Ella was still young, and James was too young to remember, their father passed away. Ella doesn’t remember what happened, she just remembers their mother sitting them down to tell them. It wasn’t long after that that Gabriella remarried. To Ella he was a slightly boring, very average man and she didn’t bother to try and spend time with him. Her mother seemed happy, they all did, and life passed quietly by for a long time. Eventually another brother came along. Even in her happiness though Ella’s mother pushed her children to always succeed at everything - grades, sports, arts. Ella was a natural but her brothers were never quite as driven as she was. The older she got the more she became aware of how their mother treated them, especially James. Slowly her feelings towards her mother started to grow more and more sour. She tried in her own way to convince her to love them as they were but it didn’t seem to work.

One Thanksgiving when she was home from college Ella took her brothers out to get milkshakes like they had done as kids. While they were out there was a fire. Neither their mother or step-father survived it. Her mothers best friend was convinced Ella had done it but they could find no signs of arson and it was ruled an accident. Her brothers went to live with their grandparents whilst she went back to college. Her friends there would say she seemed shaken for about a week before she was her old self again.  

She finished top of her class and went on to get a masters in mechanical engineering from MIT before moving to Chicago for work. Not happy with an entry level position she quickly set about working her way up from there, becoming more successful every year. Her life felt like it was going exactly to plan until she was invited round to a work friends house for dinner one night. After a bottle of wine her friend, Joan, started talking about all sorts of crazy things. Ella just laughed in her face, thinking her to be a total lightweight. Even as she started to strip off her clothing Ella still laughed but she stopped when the girl started to transform into an animal. She tried to get away but wasn’t quick enough. The next morning Joan explained further. She said she wanted to lead her clan and that Ella was going to help her secure the role.

Ella’s rage boiled over and she attacked Joan. She got in a few good hits before Joan overpowered her, trying to talk her down. It was too little too late, Ella’s mind had already hardened against her former friend. She openly vowed to her that she would destroy her before storming out. With the information Joan had told her it didn’t take her long to track down the acting head Nada. She played the victim and begged for his help in figuring out this new life.

Not long after that she’d gotten the lay of the land within the clan and allied herself with Gretchen, offering her support in her becoming the next leader of the clan.

→ The Present

Ella has now settled into life as a shifter, taking the needed steps to make sure her life wasn’t too disrupted by it. She’s still at work, continuing on with her ambitions there as if nothing had happened. Outside of it she is still learning all she can about the supernatural world of Chicago and how it operates. She’ll talk with anyone who can give her more information.

She’s happy to see that Joan failed in her bid to gain control of the clan but it’s not enough. Ella is now working to get her fired from her job.

[borisbubbles]

18. GREECE

Stefania - “SUPERG!RL”

The choice I’m being faced with is: Do something productive with my life, or finish a ranking of an imaginary contest I started months prior. It is with a certain reluctance I once again take up my ranking pen. 🙄

ENTRY ANALYSIS

And as I do, I am instantly reminded why this particular song stumped my ranking more than anything else. Enjoyment isn’t the issue at hand here. “Supergirl” (I am *not* doing the !-for-I bullshit, I’m not a ten year old) is fun and trash. I’M YO SUPERGIRL NANANA IN THIS CRAZY WORLD NANANA. It doesn’t light my world on fire, but sure it’s pleasant enough. Naturally, my positive feelings may also stem from this bopperino:  

~jeweethetnietnietprecieswatjedoenmoet~ ~jeweethetnietnietpreciesmaar’tvoeltgoed~ BOOM BOOM BANGERANG, BITCHES (SHOULD HAVE WON!!! wtf!!! don’t kids like fun anymore???)

So, why am I not feeling inspired by this particular entry? Well, two things. 

Firstly, "Supergirl” isn’t that good when you start comparing it to everyone else in the contest. It compares very favourably to the other Greek entries of recent memory (it’s literally their best entry since... Koza Mostra?) but then again *everything* looks good when compared the Greek entries of recent memory. Lithuania is a better country in the past five years than Greece. Serhat scored better than any Greek entry in the past five years. yadda yadda. It gets worse when you compare it to the other 2020 songs who, let’s face it, outbop it -  “Still breathing” does “obnoxious flute-through-a-bullhorn” riff better. “Cleoatra” does “ridiculous nonsensical pop culture rape” better. Hell, even Senhit, whom I remind you I already ranked arguably delivered more on the trashfront.

Secondly, um Greece sucks at ESC??? the ERT selection procedure is so formulaic you can recite it step by step without batting a lash. 

First, ERT will glom onto a reasonably talented artist who on paper should to stand out just based on who they are but in reality is sort of a desperate nobody. (in this case a Greek-DUTCH Jesc alum because the contest were to take place in Rotterdam - I hope nobody reading this post is anywhere near ‘surprised’ upon learning that ERT are total scrubs) Second, they’d sicc a silly uptempo trashbop onto her she is bound to dislike instantaneously, (lo and behold, persistent rumours that Stefania LOATHED “Supergirl” and felt superembarrassed by it <3 out of the mouth of babes). Naturally, the song will have been composed by Dimitris Kontopoulos, the dodie to Kirkorov’s ginger. I rag on Philipp Kirkorov a lot, given that the man has the looks and casual panache of a vaudeville villain, so allow me to praise him for the sake of underlining why he > Kontopoulos every fucking day. Not only is Kirkorov a RAAAGING regency homosexual in the best possible way (look at the coterie of artists he’s written for and convince me this *isn’t* a group of people your average basic ass gay wouldn’t build sacrificial pyramids for, you can’t) he also underscores his GoodGayness by writing BANGERS. The man understands Eurovision and he works hard make it better every year. 

Meanwhile, Kontopoulos’s most successful esc song without Kirkorov’s guiding hand is “This is Our Night”, which is the antimatter equivalent of a banger.  Then after the selection process, Greece would create a lot of fake hype, enough to convince a few impressionable influencers that the entry isn’t a complete crock of shit prior to rehearsals, bloating betting odds. Only to hit said rehearsals and have everything fall apart, like a deep sea fish brought to the surface, because SURPRISE the act and song and premise turned out bad and irredeemable and stupid respectively, who knew! 

Now, I am aware this sounds immensely cynical and mean, especially when projected onto a never-was ESC entry. However, this is the state of Greece we live in and that state is a Sophoclean fucking tragedy. If life gives Greece lemons, I’ll gladly down the avgolemono. All that’s left is the perverse bemusement of their inevitable self-inflicted downfall because the alternative is teeth-gnawing frustration. 

Again, reminder that I ENJOY the obnoxious, thundering goat horns that make up 106% of Supergirl’s ‘musical’ appeal and the CHEESIER-than-GOUDA vidclip and especially i LooOOoOOOve the backstory of them having to ADD IN THE EXCLAMATION POINT IN THE TITLE DUE TO A WONDER WOMAN COPYRIGHT CLAIM (<33333333333), but since each of these are done better *by other entries* in the same fucking year, the song takes a MASSIVE backseat to the inevitable spaking it would have deservingly received in Rotterdam. On the scale between genuine like and ironic like, "Supergirl” lands *entirely* on the latter for me. 

Eurovision 2020 vs Eurovision 2021

ERT already confirmed Stefania for 2021, officially because it was only fair, but probably in large because it’s cheaper to stick with her (after all, Stefania doesn’t even have to fly over to Rotterdam or check into a local hotel since she already lives in the fucking Netherlands, less than an hour’s drive away from Rotterdam). 

Whatever, I support it regardless. For all the shittalking I’ve done, I genuinely like Stefania (identifying her song as rubbish shows good instincts, if nothing else) and I absolutely hope she can deliver something genuinely good next year. 

Something tells me we’ll see the *exact* same journey “Supergirl” would have had though: A safe qualifier preshow that would have *barely* Demy’d through, to the ire of many. Then, to the shock of Greece and nobody else, it would’ve finished in 21st place with 24 points from Cyprus, 16-20 points from San Marino and about 4-5 from everyone else - so yeah, exactly the same trajectory we’ve seen in the past few contests. Oh well. Show must go on. 

FREAKY! FRIDAY! FACTOR!!

I’m of two minds here, because on one hand, “Supergirl” absolutely DOES NOT break the mold for Greece in the slightest. 

Then again, every year it’s the same doom count until Greece inevitably combust into failure and by god, when Greece melt down they fucking MELT DOWN. Every time something (anything) (everything) doesn’t go according to plan, it’s always accompanied with a spitfire of personal attacks lobbed at anyone who dares prove Greece’s sucktitude (rival entrants, the press, people with functional hearing) and a full batallion of newscasters imprinting disappointment onto the retinae of the Greek public because the singer of choice ~had let the entire nation down~ for like... missing two notes due to a persistent cold. It’s always a wild and wildly entertaining ride... as long as one sticks to observing from the sidelines. 

Score: 3 Senhits out of 5. 

[the-hidden-writer]

An Odd Family Tree

A series of snippets from the lives of the FitzSimmons family, set post 7x13. Also, the series of events that leads up to the birth of their grandson.

Available to read on AO3 and FF.net.

Comments make my day!

Chapter 5: Permission

Leo Fitz loved football. It was his thing. He used to play in the local field with a bunch of other boys when he was little- that’s before he started to spend every free hour of every day engineering. So about eleven years old then. And since they’d retired he’d taken a huge step back from engineering and fallen back with his first love. Seriously, if anyone asked him a simple question about football he would probably ramble about it for at least two hours.

“Knock knock!”

Oh, and another thing about football: he did not like getting interrupted.

He adjusted his position to sit up on the sofa. “If that’s anyone that’s not called Owen then come in!”

Of course, it was Owen who entered.

“Hi Mr Fitz-Simmons.” He greeted, somewhat meekly.

Fitz didn’t respond.

“Oh hey, you’re watching soccer. Can I join you?”

“Not if you call it soccer.” Fitz grumbled. Owen just laughed and sat next to him anyway.

If there was one thing that Fitz had learnt about Owen over the year of him dating Alya, it was that he could not shut up. And that was not an exaggeration. Fitz was pretty convinced that if the man went five minutes without saying something then he would quite possibly explode.

So it was unnerving to say the least when all he did was fidget next to him. He appeared to be concentrating on the screen, but when Fitz looked closely he could see that his eyes weren’t entirely focused.

He must’ve been deep in thought. Fitz didn’t even want to consider what the hell he was thinking about.

“So… you a big s- football guy then?” Owen asked eventually, making Fitz actually sigh in relief.

“Yes.” Was his short reply.

“Cool.”

Uncomfortable silence. Fitz felt like the other man was plotting something. He did not like it.

Owen took a deep breath. “Hey-”

“You do know I don’t like you, right?”

Letting out a choked sort of laugh, Owen hung his head and said quietly: “Really? I hadn’t noticed.”

“You’ve got no common sense,” Fitz continued, “and half the time I genuinely can’t tell if you’re faking your stupidity or not.

And I can never forgive you for taking my daughter away from me, Fitz doesn’t add.

“Look, I know you hate me.” Owen said, his voice still strangely quieter than usual.

It suddenly occurred to Fitz that Owen might be unwell. And even he, a cold-hearted miser according to Alya once, would feel guilty for insulting someone when they’re ill.

“Hate’s a strong word.” He told him. “I don’t hate you lad, but I think it would be crueler to lie and pretend to like you like Jemma does.”

Owen seemed to react at this, and Fitz wondered if he was really so dumb as to not realise that Jemma didn’t like him either.

“She doesn’t?” He asked, confirming Fitz’s theory.

And there was that guilty feeling again. “Well she definitely likes you more than I do. We love Alya with everything we have, and we only want the best for her. And whatever she says, I for one couldn’t care less if my daughter doesn’t end up with you. Now don’t you have somewhere better to be?”

Fitz realised a little too late that he’d phrased that wrong, and for once he actually hoped that Owen wouldn’t pick up on the subtext.

“I love her too, y’know.” Owen said dejectedly. “And I came here to ask you something. But I’m a little put off now if I’m honest…”

On-screen, it was half-time. Fitz tried to relay the fact that Owen was ill over and over in his head to stop himself from punching him.

“If answering your question will make you go away, then sure. Ask away.” He said, taking a sip of his tea.

Owen took a deep breath and looked Fitz in the eyes. Fitz noticed for the first time just how bright, green, and honest they were.

“Will you give me your blessing to marry your daughter?”

He did not do a spit take. That never happened. But it was funny, for a second Fitz could have sworn Owen just said…

“What?”

“You heard me.” Owen said, and suddenly Fitz realised why Owen had sounded off.

He’d been nervous- no, terrified of him. This entire time he’d been trying to muster as much confidence as he could. And the fact that he’d been scared meant that he respected him.

And Fitz didn’t know how to feel. He felt like he’d just been shot in the heart but the pain hadn’t registered yet.

He coughed. “W-Well, you’ve got nerve, I’ll tell you that.” He did not wipe the liquid off his chin, because he did not do a spit take. “After I just told you how much I don’t like you.”

Owen laughed, a bit more menacing this time. “I hope you know that I’ll propose to her whatever you say. It’s just that you three are so close that I thought I’d ask for your blessing.”

The implications started to sink in. “Wait, you’re being serious?”

This man, this hooligan, was asking to marry his little monkey. His princess. His universe. His Alya. The girl whose nappies he changed. The girl to whom he showed the stars. The girl who he tried to teach engineering to, but ended up taking after her mother and studying biology and becoming one of the leading experts in marine biology and was running an entire initiative to save the oceans.

The woman that had just turned thirty.

Ever since Owen, Alya had fought with him a lot more frequently. She would always defend him, telling her father that it was his fault that he didn’t just give him a chance to get to know him. Fitz didn’t change his stance. And maybe, Fitz thought, if he’d taken that chance, then he would be able to see Alya’s appeal in Owen. Her love for him hadn’t wavered, and any fights she’d had with Owen had all been resolved very quickly. Was it really only Fitz that felt so negatively towards him?

“Hey, um, before you answer let me say something.” Owen said.

“I know I’m reckless and stupid. I get that from my parents. But when I’m standing next to literally the smartest family on the planet, how can I not be? I think you think I’m ‘the worst’ (yes, I heard that) because of that, when in reality I’m just average. I was shocked when Alya loved me back, because she is the definition of a genius, and I’m just… me. I’m Owen. The guy nobody likes.”

Fitz listened on in silence, every word striking him as familiar.

...Deke.

“And I tried so hard to impress you,” Owen continued, “even though you guys already know everything. It’s impossible to impress you. The one thing that impresses me is the fact that Alya still likes me after so long. So yeah, I understand if you say no, but I love your daughter and I’m actually pretty good at fighting so I’m willing to die for her. I’ve been told that I can be pretty selfish, and I agree, but not when it comes to Alya. She’s my everything.”

Wordlessly, Fitz switched off the TV. Football could come later. He didn’t know when his eyes had started to well up, but he knew that his vision was now blurry. He had to swallow the lump in his throat.

“You have my blessing.”

Owen nearly jumped out of his seat. “Wait, really?!”

Fitz’s breathing was shaky, and he held his head in his hands. “Yes.” He said, his voice muffled. “Now go before I change my mind.”

It was comical how quickly Owen raced out of the room.

Jemma walked in moments later.

“Darling what’s wrong? What did you say to Owen this time?”

“I told him to bugger off.” Fitz said, looking up to face his confused wife.

“Really? Is that-”

“Jemma.” He interrupted, his voice breaking. “He asked for my blessing.”

Jemma’s face went through a whirlwind of emotions in a tiny amount of time like a silent movie.

“O-Oh.” She said finally. “Did you..?”

“Yeah.” Said Fitz. “But Jemma, he sounded just like Deke.”

Both of them flinched at the name.

He sighed. “Is it bad that the main thing I remember was that I couldn’t stand him?”

“Yes, it is.” Jemma said, moving to sit next to her husband and rub his back soothingly. She was beginning to get choked up herself. “I remember that he was lovely. His memory is what lets me tolerate Owen.”

She wiped away the tears that threatened to fall from his eyes.

“I think you need to start at least tolerating him now, too.”

Fitz did the same for his wife.

“Yeah, I guess I’m gonna have to now.”

[skrltwtch]

The Cat

Prompt: The most wanted woman in town has announced that she’ll only marry the one who can open her front door with the key around her cat’s neck. Many men try to hunt the cat down, chase and trap it, but to no avail. The cat is simply too quick, smart and clever, and always finds a way to evade and avoid them. You are the first one to figure out the obvious: Do not chase the cat. The cat is befriendable. Get the cat to trust you, to genuinely enjoy your company, and you can hang out with the cat. You may eventually be allowed to touch the cat. The cat will freely let you take the key.

Secondary plot twist: The woman is a shapeshifter. She is the cat. (Source of prompt in link at bottom of post.)

Word count: 1,840 words

Author's note: This is more of a little tale starring George as the lead and you as the mysterious woman, as opposed to a story about George MacKay the Actor. I kind of had Jack Marrowbone's look — and nothing else about him in that movie — in mind while writing this.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

‘Let’s play a game! I will grant my hand in marriage to the person who succeeds in taking this key off my cat’s neck and unlocking my front door with it. Oh, won’t that be such fun?’

Only she can pull off such a stunt. She has put the village under some kind of spell, and I am one of its victims. One of the more prudent ones, at least, in the sense that I know well enough that I’ll never be able to win her heart. She has an entire village of men to choose from, most more remarkable than I in looks and/or calibre. I am but a simple baker of average frame with blonde locks that wishes for no kinship with a comb and blue eyes that gleam with neither transcendental allure nor immense potential; unless she were an ardent consumer of bread and pastries, I have nothing to offer her. I simply admire her from afar, pine for a connection that is real only in my wildest dreams.

No one quite knows what it is about her that sees a constant line of suitors supplanting her shadow whenever she comes into the village. That is to say, she isn’t not beautiful, neither is she not gracious. She keeps to herself mostly in her quaint cottage on the edge of the village. Her isolation and magnetism have made her the subject of many a fevered whisper: she is a witch, an enchantress, a nymph. Despite what one may think, the women of the village don’t resent her for the effect she has on their eligible male compatriots. The wedded men remain capable of remembering their vows in her presence. In that vein, her paramours are on equal standing: single, virile men who want to have the unhaveable.

Her game has sent the men into a frenzy. It’s amusing to see adult males chase after a cat, one just as unassuming as its owner. They hunt it, as if it were game. They harass it, as if it were a nuisance, an obstacle to their perceived prize. They seek to capture it with elaborate traps. They line the fishmonger’s pockets with gold for her finest catch of the day. It’s all for naught. The cat is, they’ll never admit to themselves, smarter than them. The days pass. She continues to wander around the village without a ring on her finger. The cat continues to taunt the men with its presence, parading the key around its chest like a gibe at their failures. It’s curious that they are never seen together.

Me? I don’t try. I’m not presuming myself to be above this endeavour. I do slip into reveries about emerging victorious every now and then. But see, the other men had never grown up with cats. The thing with cats is, you don’t try. You don’t try to get it to do what you want. You don’t hound a cat. And, as with all living things, you certainly don’t antagonise it. So, I bide my time.

That day soon arrives. As a customer leaves, the cat makes a mad dash into the bakery, maintaining the balance of two beings inside. It glides over the counter, its tail a hair’s breadth away from toppling the display of sourdough bread, and seeks refuge behind some boxes. Shortly after, Edward, its tormentor for today, it seems, enters and calls for the cat. Edward is a cheesemaker, with whom I interact solely out of business necessity. Our families go back a long way, our trades intertwined with one another’s. I do so long for someone else to assume the mantle from Edward.

‘Where is it? I saw it come in here,’ he says.

‘It’s behind here with me,’ I say, ‘but I’ll be damned if you dare make a scene on my premises.’

‘I can respect that.’ His response takes me aback. It seems I am not a contender, much less a threat, in this game of cat and mouse. Edward’s never been one to mince his words. ‘That cat will have to leave eventually, and when it does, it’ll be mine.’

‘Good luck, Edward. Goodbye.’

‘Goodbye, George. Thank you for having the good sense not to participate in what would be a futile endeavour for you.’

There it is.

I wave at him. He doesn’t reciprocate. It doesn’t matter: watching his outline fade into the distance and out of my sight for another day will never not be the highlight of our interactions.

I feel a warm presence weaving in and out between my legs. I kneel down to meet the cat’s gaze, two yellow diamonds set onto a doll-like face coated in pure onyx. I have wondered on occasion if some of the men’s malice toward it arises from the mere virtue of its colour. How preposterous, I imagine them thinking, that something as divine as she should possess such a vile creature. I offer it my finger. It gives it a tentative sniff. Two. Then it turns its head so that my finger is on its cheek, and it starts rubbing it. Its eyes are closed in contentment; its throat rumbles with soft purrs.

‘Did Edward hurt you?’

‘Meow.’ A once-over confirms it.

‘Are you hungry?’

‘Meow.’

I take that as a yes. No one has ever answered otherwise to this question while surrounded by MacKay creations. I grab a pumpernickel bagel from the counter, tear off a chunk, and lay it at its feet. As it eats, a metallic glint almost blinds me. The key. It calls to me. What’ll happen if I reach for it? What’ll I prove to Edward, who is patrolling the street outside, waiting for the chance to resume his reign of terror? No. I won’t. I don’t.

I speak to turn my attention from the small sheet of metal that’s turned the village upside down: ‘Are you having fun being the centre of attention? She must be relishing the peace, not having men fawn over her for the first time in a while. Is that why she hasn’t been visiting lately? I don’t fault her. It must be exhausting,’ I say, as I continue to ply it with bits of bagel.

It looks up at me, and it sizes me up and down. Its head cocks at what it’s registered in its mind’s eye. Of course. How rude of me. ‘I’m George,’ I say.

It rubs its head against my outstretched hand.

‘Nice kitty.’ I give it the rest of the bagel and lead it to the back door, through which it can avoid that scoundrel Edward and find safe passage home. ‘You can bring it back for her. Your mistress. Then maybe you can let me know if she liked it.’ I smile wistfully. ‘We’ve never actually met.’

‘Meow,’ it promises, then runs off.

Over time, more and more people quit the quest — Edward included. The unhaveable isn’t as appealing when it becomes haveable at the expense of hard work at best and deep gashes at worst. Her increased bouts of absence, too, seem to have made people’s hearts become less fonder, as if her glamour is wearing off. In contrast, the cat and I grow closer. We bond in my bakery. Then it stops coming to visit. I worry over whether it’s because someone else has succeeded. I work up the courage to go to her house. Seeing the cat play in her garden, the key still around its neck, fills me with relief, and I pick up from where I left off here in the grace of her garden. Oddly, she is never around when the cat’s there.

I make it special baked goods no one else has or will have access to and tell it to keep some for its mistress. I never find out whether she likes what I bake, but the cat definitely does. I tell the cat about myself in the hopes it’ll tell its mistress about me. I play with it using toys I buy from Christopher the merchant; he is happily married and has never shown interest in her. The men who gave up have spurned me for not taking the key when I’ve had ‘so many’ chances. They talk among themselves. I know what they say about me.

The truth is, I don’t know what’ll happen if I do take it. The cat and I have befriended each other. Will it think lesser of me for taking the key? Will I think I was befriending it under false pretences? It’s silly, I know, to care this much about what a cat thinks. But I suppose the cat is an extension of her. I feel so close to meeting the woman I’ve adored for the longest time, the woman who I knew in my gut from the moment I laid eyes on her is my soulmate. Sometimes I sneak glances into the house to see if she’s there, watching this. The cat redirects my attention to it when it catches me doing this, and I’m all the happier for it.

‘You’re lucky,’ I say to the cat. ‘You get to be with her while she doesn’t know I exist. I’ve loved her since I first saw her in the village. It’s foolish to feel like this about someone you don’t know, doesn’t it? But I know she’s kind and patient and has a good soul, and I know my heart flutters every time I see her.’

The cat jumps onto my lap. Its yellow gaze burns into me. It’s right. I don’t know what I was thinking, pouring my heart out to a cat. ‘You just want rubs,’ I say, and I’m happy to oblige.

It turns itself over, exposing its belly to me. I feel … honoured. In all our time spent together, this is the first time it’s done so. I slowly reach for its belly. When there is no sign I’ll lose my livelihood from what I’m about to do, I stroke it generously, fervently.

Then it uses its paws to nudge my hand toward the key.

I stop. ‘Are you … sure?’

‘Meow.’

I repeat my question. My hand has found itself an inch away from the key.

‘Meow.’

If it says so.

I undo the chain the key is on.

Suddenly, I am blinded by a white light, and — the air starts to smell of roses. It is a familiar aroma. I don’t need to use my sight to know why that is. But I don’t understand.

‘Hello, George.’

Before I can answer, I find myself in the kind of embrace reserved for lovers. My lips press up against hers, and I feel my world fall away in bliss. The warmth of her skin is unlike anything I ever felt. It’s magic. Pure magic. And now I understand.

‘We will have the rest of our lives to know each other better, love,’ she says, smiling, her eyes shining yellow under the sunlight. ‘Now, would you like to come in?’

[pixelsbichoice]

Ranking Choices series by how Gay they are

A review no one asked for but an important one nonetheless

EDIT: Updated for latest books 6/29/19

The Freshman - While Zack, Kaitlyn, Becca, and Zig make this a sweet Gay Squad, the book has prominent bi-erasure if you date a man and forces you to deal with toxic Het Drama for multiple books that leaves you begging for the sweet release of diamond death to never come - 4/10 Gay but at what cost

The Crown and the Flame - Kenna is a bisexual Queen, but the fact that they don't give Dom a male li until awkwardly at the very end is tragic - 5/10 Could be gayer

Most Wanted - Look Sam is a Lesbian Icon(tm) but the narrative pushes for Sam and Dave - 3/10 Pretty Het

Rules of Engagement - Forces the MC to be with a man, doesn't give Party Twin a female li until the third book, and older brother's het drama is insufferable - 2/10 Some gay but too much straight to try

Endless Summer - MC can be a guy or a girl. Pretty gay, but the female lis are not treated as well as the male ones, also there are a lot of straight couples and the fact that Pirate Queen Yvonne ends up with a man? Tragic(tm) - 5/10 gay but could be gayer

LoveHacks - Points for the bi black man and the lesbians, but the first book paywalls its only female li to shit, only has the MC date men, and has Brooke end up with a man instead of Seerena - 3/10 Gay but too Het to handle

The Haunting of Braidwood Manor - Nothing but love a respect for my lesbian ghost girlfriend, but you have to pay to stay together (but it is only 17 diamonds and that is a bargain these days) - 8/10 Lots of lesbian love but at a cost

The Royal Romance - Largely forced to spend time with a man, has only one female li even though Olivia is literally right there, and has Penelope get with Kiara's brother even though Kiara is literally right there - 3/10 Very Het

Hero - MC can be a guy or a girl. Kenji is a BIcon but it takes a while to meet the only female li, also the Poppy and Dax het drama is too much - 6/10 Decently gay and has potential

High School Story - MC can be a guy or a girl. Besides the fact that we have to deal with the Het Tragedy that are Brian, Max, Kara, the dumb Autumn love triangle, and what the ever loving fuck is that set up your Dad with Emma's Mom nonsense, these books give a lot of LGBT+ rep - 7/10 Gen Z is the Gayest Gen

It Lives in the Woods - MC can be a guy or a girl. Gay Icon right here, we stan our Trans King(tm) King Kang, Ava and Stacy are female li legends, Lily is our beautiful Lesbian Queen, nothing like the raw gay energy of swinging a barbed wire bat at the undead - 15/10 GAY ICON

Home for the Holidays - One female LI, but at what cost? Can't play as a guy and forced to have dated one (1) man. Don't even get me started on Nick Peralta - 1/10 Literally ever Het Hallmark Christmas movie ever so RUN

Red Carpet Diaries - It feels like it should be pretty gay between the BIcon that is Seth, the Lesbian Legend that is Teja, and the absolute QUEEN that is Victoria, but man does it throw that all away to be SUPER FREAKING STRAIGHT between Matt and Hunt and paywalling the fuck out of Victoria - 3/10 RIP Gay potential

Perfect Match - MC can be a guy or a girl. Can choose to have your perfect match be a guy or a girl. A beautiful array of lis to choose from and they can all be yours because PB said Polyamory Rights! Even though there is some Het stuff with Nadia and Steve, it is actually tolerable. The President can also be a black lesbian and that's the America I want to live in - 10/10 Living my best gay thot life

Bloodbound - Even love interests whom? Sure you get two wonderful female love interests, Lily and the ultimate BI QUEEN Kamilah, but forget ever hanging out with them. This is the JAX AND ADRIAN SHOW ONLY BABEEE - 4/10 Not even a cheap Priya scene can help, PB said fuck wlw

Veil of Secrets - MC can be a guy or a girl. Ms. Harlenay is a Lesbian icon. Kate is a true BI disaster and the fact that we can only get with her romantically at the end of the book is the Biggest Tragedy of Choices - 6/10 It's fun and gay until you die alone bc you don't have enough diamonds

America's Most Eligible - MC can be a guy or a girl. You can thot it up and kiss so many people, Mackenzie is the only female li you can hang out with most of the time and there was one weird scene where Adam and Derek were super "no homo"??? - 6/10 Gay potential but oof the Het

Desire & Decorum - Only one female li, but she is Amazing. Mr. Chambers gay ass is the real MVP. God bless our non-homophobic gay ally of a dad (rip). But still this book got a lot of Het nonsense bc of the time period - 4/10 Press F to pay respect to our gay ancestors

Across The Void - MC can be a guy or a girl. Even number of lis with even screen time and your siblings can be gay too if they weren't so annoying and stealing your screen time - 7/10 Gay but it's hard to read

Big Sky Country - MC can be a guy or a girl. If you are a wlw, there is a lot of Het nonsense and it is hard to be with the female lis. If you are a mlm, ooh boy is this book Really Gay. Like literally every guy wants your city dick. Still there is some Het stuff - 6/10 Average; Life is what you Gay it

High School Story: Class Act - MC can be a guy or a girl. You can choose the gender of the li you are forced to have a crush on so that is nice. If you play as a guy your twin can be a Lesbian Icon and Erin can like girls but if you play as a girl it's like super het. Don't even get me started on Natalie and Clint - 6/10 Gay but oof

It Lives Beneath - MC can be a guy or a girl. Great even bunch of lis and our gay little brother is the most wholesome thing - 8/10 Good gay content minus you know all the Gore and Death

The Elementalists - MC can be a guy or a girl. Let’s hear it for Ace rep! Except the imbalance of li scenes and how Beckett is constantly forced onto you continues to put this book on thin ice, especially with the lack of flirting options for wlw - 5/10 Gay but lesbian struggles

A Courtesan of Rome -  Forced to kiss men. Female characters treated like shit. Sabina stans deserved better. But Gay brother can get his happy gay romance. Caesar/Cleopatra/MC threesome said bi rights. Parents are the biggest gay allies. The biggest disappointment is the untapped potential - 3.5/10 RIP to anyone who hoped to romance Cleopatra

The Heist: Monaco - MC can be a guy or a girl. Allows you to choose gender of one your lis. Has the potential to have 3 female lis who are all iconic. But makes you pay for not 1 but 2 women crew members so having an all women crew is a struggle - 8/10 Let's go Lesbians!

Update:

Ride or Die: A Bad Boy Romance - Everyone thinks you and Logan are dating even if you haven’t romanced him in the slightest. Gay rep in minor characters but at what cost. - 3/10 We been knew of the het nonsense since we saw the tagline

Open Heart - MC can be a guy or a girl. If you are guy this book is great. Seriously Dr. ER always down for the BJ (sorry homophobes he BI!✨). If you are woman, HAHAHAHa. Only one female li who is forced to hate you for a few chapters. Seriously Sienna and Aurora and Kyra are right freaking there just give the wlw something!!! - 4/10 Gay but could do so much better

Passport to Romance - MC can be a guy or a girl. Even number of love interests except for the fact that one of the female li has a boyfriend for 75 percent of the book. Still this book is dreadfully boring or annoying which is sad because Sumire and Ahmed are wonderful. - 7/10 Gay but forgettable

Wishful Thinking - Story has MC spend most time with the two male lis, but MC, Anna, and Ellen working together to take down corrupt politicians ala Charlie’s Angels is awesome! The fact that you can sleep with Ellen coming out of nowhere like a dark horse? Amazing! - 5/10 Gay potential

Nightbound - MC can be a guy or a girl. Even number of love interests, but recent changes make it obvious the book wants you to lean towards Nik. Barely any scenes with Vera or Katherine. There is a gay fae and rock troll love story but you have to pay for it -  4/10 A fun supernatural story PB is forcing to be the next great het romance

Platinum - Can choose for your two main love interests Avery and Raleigh to be male or female which means you are not forced to romance men unless you want to! The women are so pretty it hurts. Get to kiss beautiful women for freeeee. Shoutout to non-binary audience. Every song is bop that fills me with gay pride. Only major downfall is you can’t choose to play as a guy. - 9/10 Move over Hayley Kiyoko there is a new Lesbian pop star in town

And Sunkissed is still up in the air while The Royal Heir is on the thinnest of fucking ices.

[devintrinidad]

Oh I’m doing great! Working hard and stuff. Hope you’re doing awesome too! Thanks for asking! =)

Oh wow so that’s the broader definition. Uhm, when you put it like that… 1146 can scarily fit it if he really wanted to. The guy does have a great need to be loved deep down and when he gets deep for someone. It’s deep.

Basophil: His want is as the nature of cytokines. Powerful and  needed. But as a cytokines storm emerges from the heavens to reign down hell upon those who used to look to them for sanctuary. He too has become a weapon against the heart. Deadly and chaotic in it’s absolute assurance.

3803: I don’t know what you mean at all! D= But I think you’re talking about White Blood Cell and trying to validate my feelings so thanks… (I think).  

I think 3803 would totally forgive 1146 for anything so long as it was related to his work. After all 3803 is just as dedicated to the job as 1146 is. It might get overlooked but she is sooo dedicated to being a good red blood cell and helping the body even 1146 is incredibly impressed and is inspired by her. If 1146 ever had to abandon her or kill her for the sake of the body she would not only accept it but welcome it. She doesn’t want to die. But even more then that she doesn’t want to be a burden to the body. She loves her job so much it’d kill her if she was ever in the position to get in the way of the body’s wellbeing or even in the way pf other more competent cells. Even if 1146 kept his suspicion that the Normal Cell she was hanging out with possibly being Cancer a secret. She would most likely still blame herself for not distancing herself better from Cancer because she had her own suspicions and did nothing about them until it was too late. She would figure 1146 had to keep it a secret or something for his work. 

But if he did something hurtful that had nothing to do with his duty - Yeah that would definitely hurt her. 

It’s something like,

3803: I understand you have a duty and I will never get angry at you for doing anything you can to save the body. I have nothing but immense respect and gratitude to you and the immune system for putting your lives on the line for us all the time. 

1146: Thank you Red Blood Cell. I can’t tell you how much I really appre-

3803: But what does invading my privacy and breaking your promise to me have to do with your job?

1146: I needed to know in order to help you both better and-

3803: Do you really expect me to believe that!

1146: !

3803: How does knowing anything that Cancer did to me ‘help’ either of us? If that was the case Macrophage would have asked for the full story a long time ago… or Commander T or Dendritic Cell or anyone who’s job is about knowing things and stuff. It’s not important for your job to know about my privacy. If it was why did you promise not to learn about it only to ask NC right after? 

1146:….

3803: You lied to me. I bet you knew you wouldn’t keep your promise. But instead of being respectful or honest. You went behind my back. You practically manipulated me. What else have you done that I don’t know? I told you I needed time. It was hard to talk about it. Maybe I needed to talk to someone else. I did promise I would be ready someday but not right now. I only asked for time. You said you understood and respected that. But You only pretended to care about how I felt! 

1146: I do care! That’s why I needed to know. It’s my job to care and protect you and you wouldn’t… no I didn’t want to bother you. I thought if you didn’t know. It would help things better.

3803: What you think for the best for me, someone who experienced lies, deception and a violation of my space, Is to lie, deceive and ignore my space? 

1146: That’s not fair or the same Red Blood Cell… 

3803: …I just… I just never thought you’d care so little for my feelings…(gets teary eyed). I almost can’t believe it. White Blood Cell. Did I ever really know you? Am I really as stupid as I sometimes thought I was growing up?

1146: No! I-

3803: Because I even when I saw something wrong with Normal Cell before I knew he was Cancer. I didn’t do anything. I was so stupid I can’t believe I was manipulated so bad even when I saw all the signs something was wrong. I almost died. Everything was a lie or maybe it wasn’t I don’t know anymore. Now you. I thought I knew you. I thought you would never do that… I thought you valued me as a friend. But you don’t. Friends don’t deceive. They don’t lie. They’re not always right and we all make mistakes. But you knew exactly what you were doing. You lied to my face when you told me I could trust you. W-What else don’t I know about you. I feel so vulnerable. I feel so useless. I feel so stupid. Is NC better then I think he is now because of what I’ve seen and what others have said? Are you better or… White Blood Cell what are we to each other. =(

1146: = 0

3803: Because right now I don’t think we’re exactly friends. I- none of this makes sense to me. You don’t make sense to me. My personal life is not your duty… and I’m really sorry but I don’t think right now I can have you in it. *angry then devastated sobs*

Ouch. I think 1146 has never had consequences in his friendships before. He’s always been able to not suffer anything beyond a punch (he’s just so darn charming) and win the day anyway. 3803 values trust thanks to how much she’s had to rely on her trust in others and has always tried to repay said trust. In Abnormalities she’s suffered a lot thanks to deception and lies and her own inaction. I think she’d be very sensitive and need to know her friends can be honest and respect her personal boundaries more then ever. Especially since manipulative clingy NC is back and she’s not sure how much she can trust his growth/sincerity even if she’s gotten better at accepting he’s around now. To have 1146, whom she thinks is one of the most trustworthy cells she could ever meet, go out of his way to lie to her and act like he hasn’t (only to be cornered into admitting, maybe NC told her). That wouldn’t be good on her burns. 

It’d be nice if the other immune cells like 4989 and Eosinophil let her know she’s in the right to feel upset. I think Eosinophil would especially be a good bridge between 1146 and 3803. She knows 1146 and knows his pov as well as his great traits and faults. I think she’d relate to 3803 because they’re both a little similar and I think she’s better at dealing/understanding the emotional situation from 3803 better (Eosinophil does seems like the type of immune cell the average non immune cell would get along with well so she might have more practice and understanding of feelings in general). Which would be helpful to 3803 because there’d be a part of her that would feel like she did the wrong thing and be surprised her other immune cell friends are still her friends. She’d think they’d abandon her for rejecting 1146. But they’d assure her she’s still a friend they care about and know she has a right to get angry. 

I don’t think any of 1146’s friends would give him the cold shoulder. But I don’t think any of them would validate what he did either. Like Yeah buddy you could have handled this a little better and it wasn’t really that necessary to do this or that as a white blood cell. You better fix this soon because you don’t meet a nice red blood cell like that every circulation. Also do you really want to be the cell that lost your woman to NC of all cells. Now that’d be sick. Hmm maybe 4989 should try to date her instead. Hey don’t give me that look. They’d be a better pair then her and NC. =/

  Then you get moments where 3803 still worries about 1146 going into battle. But she steels herself to not follow after him. She doesn’t offer him a handkerchief. She doesn’t wave back to him when she sees him. If he pops up to save her she quietly thanks him and even suggests he get his wounds looked after before carrying on her way. If they get stuck together for a few minutes - it’s a very awkward silence. 3803 deep down wants so badly to be his friend again. But she’s sticking to her guns. She can’t have friends who lie and deceive her for personal gain even if their intentions are good. Even NC is trying to be very honest with her (which is weird because he doesn’t hide his… weird and horrible thoughts. But she guesses that’s better then his dishonesty). Until 1146 earns her trust and asks for forgiveness: he won’t get it. 1146 meanwhile is both stubbornly thinking he did the right thing yet feeling like he’s the worst lifeform in the body for hurting her. He still follows her around to make sure she’s okay and he’s racking his brain to figure out how to fix things between them and how does he see her.

Oh gosh your descriptions make me think he’d pop up in her room at night just to make sure her house is okay. Maybe sit on her bed and pat her head if she’s having a nightmare (imagine the cases where he’d sleep next to her like a cat and leave before she got up. Uhm yeah 1146 could do a lot without 3803 ever finding out. I guess she attracts a type X/). 

You know I think even NC would get annoyed by how strained their relationship is and oddly enough have good pointers for the both of them in his own sharp and blunt way. Lol. XD But this could also be him oddly enough telling 1146 they both really are similar and more monstrous then appearances would suggest. But it also means if NC can make the effort to make it up to 3803 then 1146 certainly can as well. 

~~~

So I read all of your entire analysis (as always, great job and I love your feedback so much!) and I am ashamed to say that something so trivial stood out to me:

That I should ship 4989 with 3803 in Abnormalities. Hahaha! NC/3803 and 1146/3803 are always continuously hinted at within Abnormalities and now you want 4989 to throw his hat into the ring? Are you insane, given how unstable, yandere like 1146 and NC are, they would definitely try to get rid of 4989.

However, I do believe that in the Abnormalities verse, if I were to write him like I always do 4989 would definitely be a better partner here. But who knows? Perhaps after all that 3803 has gone through and will go through (heheh), she won’t need a partner. Perhaps that’s the end goal here of Abnormalities... to cut out the cancerous and toxic relationships, let new friendships and loves grow, and then... let go...

BUT THAT’S JUST A THEORY. A FILM THEORY!

But, in all seriousness, after reading your comments, I would be feeling guilty if I were to ship either of those two (or both) within the Abnormalities verse. I mean, it would be an interesting development and would help showcase how far gone all parties have fallen, but still... If this was real life and if I’m writing NIA how we’ve been picturing it, I would definitely take 3803 into protective custody, even if 1146′s actions are motivated by good intentions and he isn’t as “bad” as NC. 

Ah, well.

Thanks for the submission and I hope that you have a wonderful day! I especially love your snippets and conversation here. Real nice dialogue, kudos for Basophil, hahah.  

[rhodochrosite-love]

Watched LOTR and The Hobbit within the span of two weeks here comes my oc genealogy (tw long post and rape mention)

So it all starts with Oropher, King of Mirkwood and father to 3 sons-- Thranduil, Galador, and Eldaerenth (last two are self made, not canon) and The youngest is at the Battle of Dagorlad, where his father was slain.  He was gravely injured, and had been patched by his elder brother Galador.... In time Thranduil had not only inherited the kingdom but had a son as well.  When his beloved was lost, however, Thranduil became hostile and did not wish to be consoled.  He even struck Eldaerenth, leaving him quite the trauma.

The youngest of Oropher abandoned the elven kingdom and sought the company of danger, quick to slay goblins and orcs with the blade that he himself had forged within his family’s walls.  As time passed he found himself fighting werewolves on the eastern borders of Hobbiton, and he had fallen injured on the doorstep of Galswinth Diggle, sister to Dina Diggle.  

Galswinth took great care of him and made him feel more at home than he had ever felt in Mirkwood.  Years passed and they found themselves married and in deep love... They would have two children, a boy and a girl, and their names would be Blithe Diggle and Shaidalar Diggle, respectively.

Why are their names not Treeleaf, you ask?  Well, Eldaerenth had changed his name to Diggle when he married Galswinth, as to separate himself further from his family.

Blithe would grow up to be quite the curious half hobbit-half elf.  He would invest himself in other hobbits lives and make merry with many!  A time had come when he had wished to venture, though.... quite unheard of!  However his father had given him his blessing and told him all he needed to know to survive, and warned him of the dangers that lie ahead....

It was on his adventures he met a gaggle of dwarves from Nogrod, one of which was Thomli Tunnelfoe; A Dwarven woman who had wanted to hurt Blithe more than anyone else.  

She just didn’t understand him, how could an elf even mate with a hobbit? they’re smaller than dwarves! it’s freakish-- Blithe didn’t seem to mind, in fact he was falling in love with her fighting spirit!  He often copied her to learn to fight better, and in time she did teach him the proper way to hold an axe.

Years upon years later did they tie the knot-- Their children would grow up to be peacemakers that fought in the War of the Ring.  

Thrirlum Diggle, the eldest daughter with dwarvish stature and hobbiton features with an appetite for a thousand chickens

Drerlum Diggle,  the second eldest daughter with hobbiton stature and slightly elvish features who did not fear the brunt of the goblin blade

and Childebrand Diggle, the youngest son with a elven stature (aka, taller than all 4 of the others) with dwarvish and hobbiton features, with a soul strong enough to outlast more than you’d think!

On Shaidalar’s side, things did not pan out particularly well for her.  She had always hoped to have many children and live a sweet life in The Shire... but fate had different plans for her.  

When she had ventured out to hunt a special meat in the Weather Hills, she was attacked and assaulted by Ergoth the Snarling, and impregnated her.  For months she was at a loss as to what to do to this child other than to kill it.  Months and months had passed and she was in agony, with her family and friends to help her through the pregnancy.  When the child was born, she had cast it out and did not care what would become of it.

Eldaerenth had stepped in here.  With his beloved Galswinth slowly dying he had begun to realize his growing lonliness.  What better way to occupy himself than to take care of an outcasted creature?  And his grandson no less...

Adelbert Diggle grew up to be the most peaceful of Diggles, to everyones surprise.  

Years after Adelbert, Shaidalar had met a man who requested aid from her father, and had offered her own services.  She knew the dangers of the outside world fairly well now, but had learned how to use a sword and shield and wanted to fight for herself.  The man, Caldwell Lonevale, accepted her help and her wisdom.

After a roaring battle with a different kingdom of man, he had married Shaidalar, and they had two sons together.

Brim Lonevale, a shorter than average man who had a great knack for blacksmithing

and Ankilm Lonevale, a man with stubby hobbiton features who took to breadmaking.

Unbeknowest to Shaidalar, however, Calswell was kanoodling with a human woman.  From the enemy side no less!  They had been kanoodling for a while now, and it was Blithe who told his dear sister.  

Years after their divorce, it was an elven man who had happened upon her in the kingdom of man, finding her so intriguingly out of place.  He was the steward of Elrond, and had dropped by every time they had come to council the human king.  Shaidalar and Falael Arrowmark had grown very fond of each other, and grew as people together.

This time, Shaidalar had a daughter, Tialla Arrowmark.

...Tiallas childhood was not as happy as you may think.  She faced racism every day and began to hate her own races-- hobbiton, elvish, dwarvish, orcish, human, all weren’t enough and too much at the same time.

To cope she fought creatures of the shadows and gained skills in which no mortal could posess.  It was only on the borders of the Shire did she finally collapse from exhaustion and defeat....

....which is how she met her beloved, similar to her grandparents.

Arlad Cottonbottom was one of the Shires finest bachelors, and while he wanted children he struggled with the concept of marriage.  Everyone wanted to please him, never showing their true selves... so when a cute woman with mystic abilities lands on his doorstep, he cannot lie and say that he isn’t attracted.

Tialla is hostile and speaks in a harsh elvish, which Arlad finds soothing despite her tone.  She is fussy the entire time she is resting, but she softens when she sees what he does for a living!  Arlad is a toymaker-- a plush stuffer specifically.  He brings so much joy to the young halflings.  He opns his heart to her and she cant help but fins him endearing...

Years later they find themselves wed, and go on to have a sweet baby girl.

Eirlys Cottonbottom, who is my main girl.  My epic, tattooed sweetheart whom i love so much.

She gets a tattoo every time she visits a new town (or she draws a symbol on a cloth and has it tattooed by her dwarf cousins later).  She gets to meet the company of Thorin Oakenshield!  Gandalf knows her well enough to know that she is trusted.  Bilbo is surprised to find that she is of hobbiton, but no surprise she comes from Eldaerenth.  He is well known within the Shire as a thieving, conniving dark elf by the grumpy.

Throin and the rest of the dwarves are put off by her family origins (or as much as she had been willing to share) but were all automatically in love with her when she downed an ale in no time flat.  Legolas finds her refreshing, as he had never even known he had a family member such as she.

She would give her all and give some more for the company, and she is at the dwarves’ side in the very end and feasts with them in the great halls of Erebor.

I’m sure she’ll either fall into a slumber when she is old, or she dies on the battlefield... perhaps she accompanies the fellowship?

if you got this far i freakin salute you chief, go ahead and give this a reblog pwease