#remove the the “r” and they're gay too

[frozen-seagrass]

Thinking about Mav being unsure of what Ice's eye color is

Of course he's not going to do the normal thing and ask the man, so he settles for finding ways to get up close and personal to try and see for himself without being obvious (-> he fails)

But every time he gets a close enough look they're different. One day they look blue but the next they look hazel. One moment they look brown but then he turns his head and a different light catches on them and they look almost green

It turns into one big game of "How close will he let me get? How much will he let me see?" And it's not until he's gotten to the point of being a breath away from Ice's face- close enough to brush lips- and standing under the bright white LEDs that he realizes that they're gray

[dykeomania]

PLS write smut for Hazel from bottoms..I need her so bad I fear..maybe like subtop!hazel..is her having a strap too far..I need her..

this is not. a full fledged fic. but this is the first time in a sec that ive let myself be inspired by an ask. this is weirdly switcher and just pure gay-sexier than it is subby!hazel. lmk if you want things to get subbier, bc i can probably do that. but for rn i have.. this image.. and i want you to walk with me on this but also hold my hand because i'm #supershy,

(minors [including 17 year olds 🙏🏽] dni fr, under the cut: not that proofread. strap lol (r!r), foul language, breeding... language... (my bad) (hazel has a strap tho), subtop!hazel except i could've made this shit so much worse so i guess switch!hazel but like, switch!reader, idk everyone's just a whore. there's an "i love you" (or.. multiple, i guess). there's a mirror. there's a vibrator. purely stream of consciousness, i don't even think the position they're fucking in makes physical sense fr. i was bored and i was thinking, so i wrote a lot. this whole thing is not realistic btw. i have very little confidence that hazel's blowing anyone's back out, but. it's my first day out in a min so i'm rusty. all respect to the community. next time when i pull up, i'll offer something a little more tame and saccharine as opposed to [exaggerated p*rnstar moans!!!]. reblogs and whatnot appreciated.)

so, i have this .. picture.

of you putting a bullet vibe in the pocket of hazel's strap before she fucks you from behind for the first time.

she eventually finds the confidence to blow your back out, and tbh, you think it's gonna end with you seeing stars because you can already hear the fucking lottery machines going off in your head. she's fucking you so well, and hazel's problem is that you're letting her know.

at first she thinks she's going crazy. but those fucking mewls into the pillow over how deep she is, how she's making you feel so good, how you've missed her so much, are sending shocks through her clit that the vibe keeps amplifying, everytime her pelvis hits your ass.

if she thrusts hard enough, which god knows she does, it almost makes her buckle over.

you're left clenching the sheets, and gasping against the linen while she fucks you, taking you in a way that's so uncharacteristically perverse that you don't even have the brain capacity to ask yourself why you didn't ask her to take you like this, sooner. her thrusts are quick and shallow, her words breathy and a little sharp. with every jolt of your body forwards as she experimentally blows your back out, it's like you feel yourself becoming more and more removed from this fucking planet. you can't help but cry -- sob, even -- as she makes you into a mess of limbs, leaving you tugging at your tits in one split second, and gripping at the sheets the next.

something happens, though.

where her hips rut into yours in deep, hard thrusts, spaced out by what feels like eternities, you can hear her. she's moaning now, breath quickening and chest rippling everytime her crotch hits yours at a particular angle. she's mewling, and unless you're hallucinating from how fucked up you are, you can hear her --

"fuck... f--uuh--ck, fuck, fuckfuck..."

-- silently beginning to whimper.

the girl goes from bullying your cunt to burying her strap deep enough in it to make the apex of its curve nudge against your g-spot, in a way that leaves your mouth hanging wide open with nothing spilling out of it maybe other than drool, but...

it's the slick warmth of hazel's back pressed nearly flush against yours and the heat of her breath against your shoulder that makes your eyes flutter open, facing your reflection in the floor-length mirror stationed across from hazel's bed.

hazel's in it so deep, you can't even see the strap anymore. and by no exaggeration, it's like an earthquake pulses through her body everytime she nudges her hips into your ass, making your vision blurry. she's rutting into you. greedily grinding her strap into your cunt in the effort of chasing her own high.

it wasn't a secret that hazel was sensitive. more often than not, the poor girl writhed against your mouth whenever she let you put it on her ("let you" is a loose sentence -- she begs for it, sometimes). you don't even know why you're surprised that your girlfriend is getting this close over having a bullet vibe pressed against her clit, hardly protected by fabric. "b--babe--"

what sounds like a plea, amongst the feeling of hazel's thighs trembling against the back of yours, inspires something sinister inside you.

you wind your hips against her, pressing back against the strap and the toy. the sight of your ass rolling against hazel's pelvis, combined with how good it feels is gonna actually, like, make hazel fucking--

"don't cum."

she loses her breath, entirely, and her rhythm, apparently. she slows, as if that was her body's instinct to obey your orders, despite the string of breaths that tumbles out of her mouth. "n-- wha-- fuck, no, nonono--"

you wind your hips deeper into hers, extracting a moan from your own throat -- fuck, maybe your gut, since that's how deep you could feel her. you press your ass into her until you feel the buzz of the vibe against folds, the frequency of it changing and humming as you press it further into her clit. "y--es," you grit. "don't fucking cum yet, hazel."

the dull, rolling vibrations through the fabric of the strap draw hazel's eyes into the back of her head, and then closed. she's grunting now -- or all of the above -- and she tries her best to unchap her lips, fruitlessly dragging over them. the little breaths she takes through them only brings them back to being puffy, pink, and a gateway of noise that gives evidence to struggle.

"gonna let me count you down?" you puff out your sentence in one breath, and hazel can fucking hear the grin in your still-fucked-out tone and it makes her whine louder.

"yeah? gonna fuckin' let me count you down so you can cum in me, haze?"

cum.. in you. three words that you'd never even fucking uttered to her before this, and that she never fucking thought she would ever hear and.. it looks like she can't complain, because her eyes roll into the back of her head and hazel swears that she -- at least, briefly -- meets jesus christ, "oh my god--," hazel slurs, hips rolling impossibly deeper into yours, it's a miracle she hasn't swabbed your cervix yet -- "ohmygod, oh my god--"

"three..."

ohfuck. ohfuck,ohfuck,ohfuck,ohfuck. it's the soft chorus that she whispers to herself as she starts to fuck herself into you, again, opting for thrusts as a means of trying to regain control with no consideration for your demise. the vision of her blurs in the mirror, and you feel your fists grasping at her sheets again.

"fuck--" you croak. "t--two.."

she pulls you further into her, and at this point, hazel's okay with being written off as a lost cause, 'cause fuck, it's not like she has a choice. the strap brief is soaked and it's entirely your fault, and god, she throws her head back. a mess of words, a mess of sensations, hazel just blurts, "oh my g--od--i love you--"

you burst out laughing at the random proclamation, admist everything.

she forces her head down to watch you, jaw hung open. and at this point, she's just speaking. rambling and slurring and gasping, tears-in-eyes-in-awe-and-all, as she watches you throw your ass back against her.

"iloveyou so much, you're so f--ucking hot, whatthefuck?--"

there's something weirdly sweet about it. something that makes your cunt clench around the strap in a way that hollows you out shortly thereafter, and lets hazel hit that fucking spot just right. before you know it, you're wherever hazel is, cunt fully creaming around the silicon.

"i love you--" you dumbly spit out a giggle, a gasp causing a steam of spit to cascade off your bottom lip and onto hazel's navy sheets. "babe," you warn. "ohfuck, ohmyfuckinggod, you're gonna make me cu---"

"fuckingsayone," hazel, unbelievably pleads while she unbelievably spears her strap into your cunt. "oh my fucking god, say one, please, please, pleaseplease--"

she starts begging. unprompted. "it's s-so good, it's so, so good, feels so fucking good, wanna c--um in you--" and she probably repeats it. probably repeats that she wants to cum in you until she's blue in the face and,

"o-one--"

until you let her.

the noise that's ripped from hazel's throat is .. embarrassing. virginal, almost. fully reverberates off the walls, and she trembles. her clit convulses against the vibe, twitching with every short stream of her release and she folds. poor girl was holding your hips for something -- for reassurance, to get a grip, dear life, perhaps? as her hips languidly fuck and press into the surface of your ass., rocking your near limp-frame after you've pretty much creamed all over her strap.

hazel hangs over you for god knows how long, dark hair shaggy and some strands stuck to her forehead in wavy wisps. cheeks flushed, and lower lip bitten to hell. the bullet vibe fucking dies, thank god almighty, because god knows she was not in any shape to reach down and turn it off.

she stays like that for a while, until she you feel her again. this time, only gentler, and much more like herself. soft hands caressing the skin of your back, her breath warm and shaky as she peppers a splay of kisses across your skin.

as you come from the surface of your own high, you feel yourself hum. still full of her, and dizzy with it. despite it, you manage -- slurring, slightly.

"haze?"

there's a hum, somewhere.

"did that really feel that good?"

hazel distantly nods, brown locks brushing against your back.

"uh.." hazel frowns, letting out a weak laugh. "y-yeah, honestly."

the mental note gets filed away somewhere deep in the haze of your brain and you grin, when you press your ass one against her just for shits and giggles and hear her gasp, from the sensitivity of it alone.

"that's my girl."

[34saveme34]

I don't exactly- have answers as we speak

but they way 4 had been acting is really interesting to me

I might rewatch stuff but I really feel like there's so much brewing in SMG4

ALSO??? NEW ATTRACTION??????? WHAT NEW ATTRACTION?????? W H E R E IS THE 2ND FLOOR??? THE SECRET ROOM????

also it's probably not just me but 4 has been making that like, type of face with a very specific vibe

each time he does I feel so uncomfortable- like there's something wrong with him

as I'm looking at it right now, it could do with so much

it could do with his lobotomy which would honestly make for a good miniarc! Almost like yknow, reinserting his meme lobe wrong made his brain do some funky shit or something and inducing him to Create Perfection or something

then again we didn't see Puzzles in a bit

not to say I'm like, impatient, I'm not one of those fans, I just wonder if PV episodes have a schedule or not

also if they're the reason we don't get wednesday episodes

which. ngl would make me really sad

I'd rather get wednesday eps than PV eps I'll be real

besides he came back early, should've made us believe he actually died for longer but they had no self control about it

anyways another possibility, which might be taking tiny lines but

considering Puzzles saying he could make SMG4 the show his own, the removal of "SMG4:" from titles could. easily coincide

I'm saying it's not 100% but it WOULD make sense and if they like, wait more before dropping shit on us about it too fast, it could make for a really good 2nd phase of the Puzzle saga and maybe he could actually prove to us face to face this time that he isn't just the bumbling idiot we've seen him as lately

like now THAT would be interesting!

although the whole tease of "it's gotta be perfect" look, guys,... fellow bloggers.... I hate to say it but they could be playing w us

like right now I don't see how a Perfect thing could be fitted into what we have right now

you're like "what? but he has been obsessing with his videos!!" yeah but there's a specific way about it

especially in this he was less "it's gotta be perfect" and more "It's gotta be all mine" like he was crazed, catching memes

this is like, entirely new of him and I don't think it's a Perfect thing, genuinely

for one, if it is, redditors would come out with the "we keep having repeats of the same character development"

but also like- Idk- if you wanna disagree with me, sure, it's not like I fully dismiss the idea wholly anyways

but it IS pretty stupid to have the SAME character development twice

especially from such a great movie as Perfect

however, gay crack ass idea of 4 going crazy over stuff to try and help 3 get enough traction that his café can take off again

I mean we saw that again, the episode was basically just Leggy, 4 being fucking off the shits and 3 stuff

the whole acting thing and also the café still doing damn awful

and I do think the idea of 4 going crazy over helping 3 would be so so comical and would be really hard to give a heterosexual explanation for! Which makes it pretty Perfect :3

[gomacave]

I have some questions for you about advent children which are

1-What do you think of Loz, Yazoo and Kadaj?

and

2- How gay is it, what do you think about sfkr in that film?

YESSS OKKKK this is gonna get sooo fucking long buckle up

I FUCKING LOVEEEEE THEMMMMMMMM THEYRE SOOO 🫶🫶🫶im like omg the sillies...! one second and then the next second im like.

LITERALLY. KADAJ MAKES ME SO FUCKING. SAD. doomed from the beginning. pulls all my hair out and vomits. seph was propped up as a false messiah and kadaj was propped up as seph its like. both of them are denied legacies and identities because of how trapped they are by the circumstances of their birth. like their births determine the trajectory of their lives AND ITS ESP TRAGIC CUZ THE TRIO R LITERALLY LIKE THREE DAYS OLDDDD.... seph was a grown ass adult and could have chosen to resist at any time but kadaj is a three year old teenager. kills msyelf. what do you fucking do hes the smudged charcoal on the other side of a drawing thats already an imitation of something from life. NOT TO FUCKING MENTION BRO NOT TO MENTION. THE WAY HE DIED. CLOUD HOLDING HIM UP PIETA STYLE WHAT IF I KILLED MYSELFFF GRRAHHH. offered mercy by ur executioner after being used as a vessel for a battle much larger than you that swallowed you up. the biblical allegory goes crazy bc the same way jesus was born to die i believe kadaj was born to die. the narrative requires him to die for cloud to have his rematch and to become a vessel for cloud's metaphorical demons (sephiroth)

i also rly like the idea that kadaj is more human/childlike than seph and post ac au when seph returns she returns with memories of having been kadaj. with all the insecurity and teenagedness and rawness of being removed from a godly existence. (in a similar way to where some ppl believe jesus/god in christian belief incarnated as a human to know what it was like) And also with the memory of being held by cloud in that way 🤠👍

Also @dykesferatu has a big brain beautiful interpretation where kadaj contains elements of cloud (the insecurity, desire for (motherly) validation, desire to prove himself etc) and is proof that seph contains elements of cloud the same way cloud contains elements of seph (s cells and stuff) I LOVE IT A LOT... THEYRE MIXED UP..... They're forever leaving scars and parts of themselves inside each other... Guh....

Loz and yazoo r so cute and cunty also.... I wish we had more of them :oT id ego and superego if they slayed....

2) ok time to go crazymode. ITS GAY!!!! ITS GAY!!!! ITS GAY!!!!!! ITS GAY AS FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My godddd. The geostigma thing is so fuckinh gay acting like its a hickeyyy 😭😭😭😭😭 "you got rid of it 😈?" GIRL. ITS A DISEASE NOT A HICKEYYYY THEYRE SO WEIRDDDDD sephs obsession w leaving her mark on cloud is insane (she is the mark) also casually confessing that she wanted to sail the universe with a barren earth w cloud specifically is so 🤮🤮🤮 GAY SEX WOULD BE LESS GAY. God. The way she sounds turned on by cloud getting stronger 😨😨😨 like howd u get so strong <333 and clouds like stfu none of ur biz LIKE HELLO??????

God also ac idea that seph can only come back through cloud is so. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 Guhhhhhhh... GUGHGGGHHH... LIKE WHEN SHE STARTED GOING OFF AB THE GEOSTIGMA I WAS LIKE BITCH STFUUUU WE ALL KNOW WHY UR GAY ASS IS BACK. Thematically ac works well for me too. Not in a way where i think it directly is connected to the og game but its a good addition. I believe that seph will always come back (in some form) because shes a metaphorical wound on cloud. And wounds may heal but they still generally scar and ache and never really go away fully. So cloud has to learn to live with her. So im a sephiroth always comes back truther. Until they reach a truce or equilibrium of some sort. (Preferably this equilibrium involves them kissing) I love divorced vibes they give off too where this godlike angel of death comes back bringing destruction and this guy's like "🙄🙄🙄 ughhh fucking you again. GO AWAY" DIVORCEDDDDDD!!!!!

[deltaruinedcoco37]

SplatoonMG4 CHAPTER 1: The Gays Meet for the First Time

(Third person)

It was currently…daytime.

Probably?

Well, that's all SMG3 could make of it. Wearing a watch just never really seemed too practical, considering that he would never need to know the time here. He just needed to go through his schedule. Was it a schedule, actually? No, more of…an instruction manual.

STRIKE MAP GUARDIAN 3 (Suction-Cup Lookout - Octoling Strike)

Always be on the lookout for members of the New Squidbeak Splatoon, especially their latest recruit, Agent Four.

If an NSS Agent is seen, immediately alert all Octoling soldiers around the map to guard the Mini Zapfish. Your map is Octoling Strike, a replica of the Inkling battle map "The Reef", and you should remain hidden in one of the many buildings around the map. Avoid engaging in battle at all costs.

If the map's soldiers are defeated, you must rush them to the nearest Respawn platforms as quickly as you can. Release at least ten Squee-Gs and evacuate until the map is cleared of all ink before sending the Octolings back in.

If confronted with no escape, we have supplied you with one weapon from our limited supply. Treat it with care, and do not break it.

DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, REMOVE YOUR HYPNOSHADES.

To be honest, sometimes SMG3 wasn't sure if the last instruction on the page was real. Maybe he was just imagining it. He did a double take, and-

-

-

-

What was he doing again?

Right, he was going to…check the Mini Zapfish capsules.

That was it.

Although, sometimes this job seemed a bit pointless. Why keep going? Why not just let them rest for a moment, why not just leave now? He had been so busy with this shit that he'd missed Octavio's concert. Oh wait, wasn't it 'Dj ZeR0' or something like that? Kinda cringy honestly.

So many people had left, yeah. Why not him? Why stay here? What was keeping him from-

-

-

-

What was he just thinking about…?

Suddenly, he heard a sound that was all too familiar to him…the sound of a certain Respawn platform linking to the soul of an Inkling.

Well.

Looks like it's time to start blasting some sweet Turquoise October in here.

~~~

"Octolings!"

Yeah, Four knew. Mario really didn't need to tell him that, but whatever. Not like he could just tell his boss to get off the line.

Agent Four, the newest NSS Agent, sighed. "I can't believe they're still trying to steal our power! Who are they even working for anyway?…I thought Zer0 was captured. Safely this time."

Luigi, the brother who originally recruited him, thought for a second. "W-well, we don't really know…since, m-most of them left, or we freed… It could be the ones that aren't free yet?"

That was kind of solid, Four thought, Maybe he's onto something. Hey, wait- is he right?… The blue-haired Inkling squinted at the Octolings. Are they still wearing Hypnoshades?

"Is it okay if I try something a little different?" he asked the brothers. They hesitated for a moment before Mario said yes, because they knew that even if he was splatted, he had a few lives left on this janky Respawn platform. Also, Mario liked dangerous stunts and chaos.

Four grinned. "Okay. Now let's see who's behind this all!"

First, he grabbed Belle's (Sheldon's) drone and turned off the Superjump target. Which was probably the most dangerous thing an Inkling can do, but that didn't matter, he had extra lives! Now it was time to launch himself at high speeds to a random spot in this place where he could end up anywhere from exactly where he needed to be to an Octarian dumpster in the city below.

C R A S H

Goddammit, that fucking hurt. Not really, since Inklings are strong, but yeah…who would've expected this? Who could've possibly expected that with infinite possibilities, one of them could be crashing through the side of a fucking building-

"AGENT 4! A-ARE YOU OKAY?!" Luigi was terrified, and for good reason. This was uncharted territory for the NSS…an Octarian city…

Wait, no. It was just one of those fake buildings the Octarians made to mimic The Reef. No wonder it was so empty.

What's that over there?

Was that…

A…

ZAPFISH?!

Whoa. Four didn't think he would find one of these little guys so unguarded…why was its capsule just sitting here?

"[Inkling.]"

He felt the uncomfortable sensation of ink that wasn't his own color touching him.

An Octobrush, and an Octarian…holding it to the side of his face. More specifically, an Octoling with violet tentacles, wielding a rather powerful-looking brush stained with magenta ink… definitely not a soldier, but what?

Carp. How would he even get out of this?

"[What's one of YOUR KIND doing here?]" the Octoling screeched. "[You've taken EVERYTHING. Our electricity, our king, our time, our LIVES. And you have the NERVE-]" he harshly glared at the Inkling- "[-to just BARGE INTO my workspace?! You…you absolute fucking dipshit!]"

Uh oh, that Octoling sounded…mad… Four thought.

Which was why it was horrible…that the Agent didn't understand a single word of the Runic that was being spoken.

"U-uuh, you're completely mistaken!" he exclaimed. "I-I'm one of you! Definitely! See, I…I knew the way here!" Four's eyes darted around the room for a second before he pointed at the hole in the wall. "Oh, wait…"

Yeah, he was not making it out of here alive. He just…uh…had to listen to this guy monologue for another minute before the sweet release of death- well, not really, since the whole Respawn platform thing. Wow…this guy will just not shut up. He must never get to monologue to anyone, that sounds…sad. :(

"[…And finally, after SO MANY defeats…we- no, I will strike you down, Agent Four!]" the Octoling yelled. "[Since I'm Strike Map Guardian 3, or SMG3, I've always felt like it has been my duty to…]"

Okay, this was actually kind of sad now. When will he stop…

Wait, 'SMG3'? That didn't sound like a word in Runic, Square, or Round…sure, maybe it was in Halfmoon, Bold, or Sign, but probably not since those were Inkling languages. Was that…his name?

He did hear about some Octarians from Beaker's Depot not having proper names.

"Uh- th-that's…cool! I'm sorry, but I have to get going…yeah…I'm totally one of you guys, so I have evil crap to do! My name is SMG4!" He weakly smiled. "Can I…"

SMG3 was not impressed. No one would be, though, the only thing really impressive about this was Agent Four's sheer stupidity. Lying to an Octoling. As an Inkling. About being an Octoling. While speaking in an Inkling language. Fucking idiot.

It wasn't a surprise when the Map Guardian finally smacked Agent Four to the ground with his Octobrush, leaving the Inkling with barely any HP… but he was still alive, and mildly annoyed now. "Hey! What was that for?! I listened to your villain monologue…"

At this point, Mario was done with just listening in silence. "Agent Four! You've gone coo-coo crazy if you think you can still get out of this! USE VIOLENCE!"

Unfortunately, it was loud enough for SMG3 to hear. Suddenly, his Hypnoshades flashed a bright red and he raised his Octobrush. "NO!" Mario screamed. "THOSE RESPAWN POINTS COST A FORTUNE IN POWER EGGS TO USE! YOU CAN'T DIE!"

Agent Four quickly shifted into his Squid form and began charging up an attack, deciding to try out that new Splatlandian technique. There was a flash of recognition on SMG3's face where he knew he'd seen that before, from other Octolings with experiences outside Octo Canyon. The people who were born on the surface, sometimes (mistakenly) captured and brought underground, had showed him…

Squid Surge. No no no- Four was going to- Three had to get out of the way!-

-

-

-

SEEK AND DESTROY

He swung his brush just a millisecond too late. He didn't want to. He had to. But why he did wasn't what mattered, the only thing that mattered now was that he would never be ordered around like this anymore. Blue ink stained his face, and he heard the Zapfish's capsule being shattered. The lights shut off in the building, leaving only the light coming in through the window from the screens that lined the Octoling Strike map's dome.

SMG3 heard the rush of ink that told him that Agent Four had launched himself out of the building, and probably the Octoling Strike map too. Everything was so much…clearer now, for some reason, the sights and sounds in reality.

A pair of Hypnoshades lay on the ground in front of him, cracked, flickering, broken.

~~~

AAAND there we have the first chapter of SplatoonMG4! If you're new to this, check out the pinned post on my blog for SplatoonMG4!

See y'all soon!

- Coco

~~~

Next (Ch. 2)

[thrilling-oneway]

I'd give you 5$ if you post that draft

you didn't even need to bribe. it's not actually in the drafts of this blog so i'll write a better version

i've said it a billion times before: tsukasa is the comedic relief weirdguy, the devs basically will do anything with him so long as it's funny.

so starting with that valentine's day vlive in 2021. during the MC part of that he gets jealous that rui has been getting chocolates and tries to brag that he got lots of chocolates too but then immediately reveals that he got friendzoned by multiple girls. his voiceline that year is something about how he catches everyone's attention on vday and year round bc he's a star or something like that but anyway that whole interaction there seems to suggest he's straight lol.

however.

he's REALLY oblivious. played for comedy ofc but i see a lot of people interpret this as him being somewhere on the aro spectrum (probably not what the writers intended but fair instance of accidentally coding a character as smth). examples include: not understanding why Akito doesn't want to be seen at PXL alone with Toya in an Akito's initial 3* (second story), literally says "thank you" when Asahi basically confesses to him and completely misses the point (he actually did seem to nearly get this one for a second), and he doesn't understand why Rui's friends are impressed that he's friends the incredibly attractive Shizuku (Tsukasa is the only not-gay-coded male character who isn't attracted to Shizuku, probably because they're childhood friends. or if you want to view him as being aspec, then that works too). also when he mentions that he's friends with guys in his class who are cool and popular and good with women, Hibiki says that he was in a class with one of those guys in 1st year and is amazed that tsukasa is in that crowd now, emphasis on the "tsukasa's friends are good with women part". tsukasa's just confused about that because of course they talk to girls a lot they're in the same class.

also he usually rewrites a lot of romance plays to remove the romance. he rewrote R&J to just make it focused on the action (which is probably because he likes playing action heroes more than anything else), and he got rid of the romance plot in little mermaid because he didn't felt it was needed (this one is justified in-universe as they do fun shows for small children and don't really need the tragic romance, and also from production standpoint like you don't do that because fandom). so yeah that could again be read as him being aspec if you want but i don't think the writers intended it to be read that way, especially the R&J one that was purely for comedy.

all that said, this is an idol game, which generally run on the rule of thumb that every character is some flavour of queer, even if it's just for fanservice (i don't play enstars but from what i do know of it it falls a bit on that last point). anyway you can probably tell where this is going but he gets ship tease with rui sometimes. vast majority of this is from Rui's side but there are things like Oki ni Mesu mama

Tsukasa: Waiting for the "1, 2…" signal, holding hands with you is an act of courage for me

or that one part in pandemonium where he drops his persona for a brief second when he's impressed by rui's plan that was very much put there on purpose, or that Tsukasa and Airi's cheerful carnival team name from that event is "swayed by their partners (相方, aikata)" and when you consider that Shizuku and Airi are heavily implied to like each other, and have canonically been on a "date", that was also a Choice.

idk whether to count KING because justified by them being actors and the fang motif in the song... vampires kinda homoerotic it makes sense that the dance routine was that. also i'm not sure if the connect lives are even canon, especially the wxs one since tokishun broke character and the 4th wall.

yeah i dunno. the writers kinda just do whatever they want with him. interpret any of this how you will i'm just recounting shit from the game.

oh hey it's longer than 300 words now

[italian-wall-lizard]

WATCHING AND DREAMING SPOILERS!!!!!!!

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ok but can we PLEASE talk about the future seen in watching & dreaming????

first of all: dana terrace is doing gods work out there. queer, latina, black, and trans kids will be able to see themselves in her characters and i think that is really beautiful. fuck disney for cancelling the show x100000

secondly: STOP IT BECAUSE ITS LITERALLY THE CUTEST THING EVER. i will admit at first i was VERY against huntlow but now i straight up love them, they're so perfect for each otherrrr!! also my boy hunter finally got some sleep, his eyebags are gone (hunter x sleep best ship)

also THE MATCHING FLAPJACK TATTOOS??? too cute i might (read: definitely will) cry

i LOVE how everyone was so supportive of luz!!! they all gathered together and threw a quinceañera (or should i say KING-ceañera) for her bc she missed it helping them rebuild the boiling isles... they r so cute!!

also everyone's futures are SO PERFECT. the designs are GOLD and they all got to do what the wanted to do (willow with flyer derby, gus with human studies, hunter studying wild magic and carving palismen, luz doing literally everything)

here is a comprehensive list of what the hexsquad + parental figures are doing in the future:

- hunter is carving palismen with edas parents and the bat queen. he also has a new blue-jay palisman and her name is waffles and i love her very very much

- willow is a pro flyer derby player

- flapjack..... i think we all know what happened to flapjack

- lillith is an architect and is helping to rebuild hexside (she also still has a personal vendetta against flora desplora) + she can go harpy mode!!!

- hooty is still and forever will always be just hooty and i love that.

- amity is making abomination tech with her dad and has an AMAZING new look

- mattholomule finally grew a moustache

- principal bump is now a gardener. good for him he deserves a break

- alador is a good person now and has figured out a way to get rid of coven sigils. he's also gay for darius i think (FUCK odalia bro!!!)

- darius is... idk what darius is. basically he's now hunters full ass father and is also gay for alador

- raine is helping to conduct research on the new sigil removing process but more importantly is OFFICIALLY BACK TOGETHER WITH EDA

- gus is now directing a human exchange program at a school for wild magic (!!!) and has a SICK new look

- quite possibly the best of all, eda is the headmaster of the school!!! she also has a captain hook-style hook for an arm and i think that is wonderful. she also FINALLY learned how to do the staff spin from season 1

- vee is still amazing and has a new look, also i'm seriously hoping she's with the human who worked at the gravesfield museum and did tarot because they would be SO CUTE

- luz reigns supreme as the queen of doing literally everything and has about 10 different majors at her college. she also has eyeliner skills that i am seriously jealous of

and HOW COULD I FORGET. king now has glyph magic???? he's getting powerful as fuck apparently so now luz gets to learn a whole new glyph system while she's at college

anyways final thoughts are: this episode was a masterpiece esp considering what dana was working with only having three episodes to fill. and of course, say it with me now:

FUCK WALT DISNEY!!!!

[poisonouswritings]

Wait r u a starkid fan??? (If not then pls ignore this uwu)

I'm gay and on Tumblr what do you think

No but on a legitimate note I've seen just about every Starkid show (not including the Tin Can Bros stuff because I can't fucking find it on YouTube) except for Ani, and I tried watching that but I'm not into Star Wars so it just fell very flat for me. I got into Starkid because of TGWDLM. I love the Hatchetfield series, Twisted, Trail to Oregon, and Holy Musical Batman. I liked Starship (absolutely loved Dylan's song in that) well enough but the ending was kinda bleh, and I just,, was not a massive fan of Firebringer or MAMD. They're fine enough but I probably wouldn't rewatch them. The Very Potter series was pretty good too but with everything that happened with JK Rowling I kinda distanced myself from it.

I ended up leaving the fandom for a bit because of the whole Robert Manion thing that I'm actually still not sure what exactly happened??? My mental health just could not deal with it at the time. But idk it sounds like stuff got resolved so ?? Idk. I know he got removed from NT2 to 'rebuild trust with the team/cast member in question' but apparently people are saying he's gonna come back for NPMD? If he does come back then I hope it's because everyone - including and especially the person he harassed - has agreed that they feel safe with him. I try to be optimistic in general and he did seem genuinely remorseful about what happened so,,, idk I'm not up to date enough to really have an opinion on all of that. It was a dark time for everyone for sure but I hope things are better.

Also I've been thinking about writing some Hatchetfield stuff and maybe messing with a Last Legacy/Hatchetfield crossover. You can throw some ideas at me if you want.

Anyways when NPMD comes out I will become a fucking monster and I apologize ahead of time.

Rant/Spoilers for Black Friday below because I have a lot of feelings about it:

Okay first and foremost I love Dylan Saunders and I love Kim Whalen but the Tom/Becky relationship was so whatever to me that I just,, didn't care about them tbh. The basic idea of it was sweet but idk!! I think the difference between them and Paul/Emma in TGWDLM (who I love) is that Paul and Emma kinda fell in love throughout the story whereas Tom and Becky kept bringing the plot to a complete grinding halt to do their shit. Take Me Back was just lackluster imo.

I loved Jeff Blim (as I always do lol) He is In A Hurry and him?? As fuckin uh??? Mister John McNamara????? ouGH I LOVE HIM 07. He makes me wanna take a solemn vow to become my best self now. I openly simp for him. He's just a fuckin spectral agent in the Black and White now and I hope he's fucking Wiley's shit up.

Also the way that Joey Richter's voice got all gruff when he said 'a gob of fucking lust'??? orz.

As a neurodivergent younger sibling with a well-meaning-but-sometimes-not-the-best-but-still-trying older sister and an abusive mother, Lex and Hannah hit me right in the chest. Especially because when we were younger my sister always talked about leaving home together. Absolutely loved Ethan but why can Robert Manion never survive the fucking show. Reversed!Ethan killed me and my heart broke for Hannah so bad.

My biggest gripe is that tOM SPENT THE ENTIRE FUCKING SHOW BEING LIKE 'OH I HAVE TO GET THIS DOLL FOR MY SON' AND THEN PAUL AND EMMA SHOW UP AT THE END LIKE 'HEY SHIT IS GOING CRAZY AND WE WERE GONNA RUN TO THE BUNKER BUT TIM REFUSED TO LEAVE YOU' AND INSTEAD OF GOING TO HIS SON (since Tim couldn't be in the group because yeah obviously Hannah needed to be there) (yes Tom would have missed the final number but it would have made way more narrative sense to the fucking character arc he'd been going through) HE STAYS AND GETS NUKED AND TIM DIES IN THAT FUCKING CAR ALL ALONE HAVING NEVER SEEN HIS DAD AGAIN AND I AM FROTHING AT THE FUCKING MOUTH. 'IF I FAIL YOU' GUESS WHAT TOM YOU FUCKING DID

[bichristian]

How do you deal eith backlash from other Christians about being gay? That is something I'm struggling with.

TW: homophobia (if you want to skip, you can just go past the bolded section)

Found out this is quesion was asked a very long time ago, but I hope that whoever you are will forgive my late response.

I tend to be pretty careful with where I share it. In most situations (even non Christian ones), I spend a long time gauging people before I ever bring it up. It helps that I have a personality and appearance of an unsalted potato, so I'm assumed straight until otherwise stated usually.

I think this comes from when I grew up (I'm not sure when and where you were young, but if you're younger than me or grew up in a more liberal area, your experiences likely will be different). When I was a kid, gay was The Insult. You didn't like something? Gay. You didn't like someone? Oh they're so gay. Gay and the r-slur (the one against neurodivergent people) were the insults du jour of my childhood. I was accused of being gay back when I didn't even know that was a thing (fifth grade me was very sheltered, though looking back yeah it was kind of obvious) and it caused one of the only friends I had to tell me in a letter that she could no longer be friends with me, because they also accused her of being gay because of how we acted together. Like it was a whole ordeal, teachers and the school guidance counselor had to get involved.

You know what I did to get that sort of rejection? When the two of us would go inside from outside roundup, I asked for us to basically play follow the leader, where one person would close their eyes and the other would guide them inside, because I was a traumatized, socially inept child who had severe trust issues. So we would be arm in arm. Yeah, looking back it is one of those situations where you go "what was I thinking", but what ten year old escapes that?

But, that got her bullied and accused of being gay. Being friends with me was a like spending too much time around social nuclear waste: you might escape unscathed, or you might also become a social pariah by sheer association (I wish I was being dramatic, but I am dead serious). I was already on the literal shit tier of the school's social heirarchy and weird for many a reason, so they hardly needed more of an excuse to punch me even further down. This was my first exposure to the concept of being gay.

I'm sure you can imagine the trauma, where before puberty I already had some serious exposure to severe judgement and social ostricization from a sexuality I didn't even know I was yet. It didn't help that my entire family is very homophobic, in the "love the sinner hate the sin" type of way, so I had a lot of internalized homophobia to deal with. (Side note: I almost never mention them in queer circles specifically because I have a very complicated realtionship with them, which I can elaborate in a different post, but I do ask that no one makes disparaging comments about my family because it only causes me, the person they're immediately affecting, intense pain.)

If you wish to ignore the long winded backstory, or skip the homophobia, here's your exit point:

I guess this is a roundabout way of saying: I honestly don't deal with that much backlash. Because as I grew up I learned to be very careful who I talked to and how I share parts of myself. I also grew up during a time where people were murdered for being gay, and that mindset still lingers. Is it a lot better? Yes. But I am hyperaware of what people can and still do to queer people, especially homophobic Christians. So in most situations, I don't engage, shut down much of the time to avoid emotional pain, and I file it in the back of my mind to keep contact with those people (when possible) to a minimum.

On the internet, it's easier because I can completely control when or if I respond at all, or just block the person. I also do my best to keep my identity personal, so it removes a lot of the sting.

I'm not saying you have to be as meek as I am. If you want to be more out and proud (or have no choice but to be), you're doing amazing. But you don't have to be defending yourself, even if they end up confronting you. You are allowed to extracate yourself from dangerous or upsetting situations without engaging in debate or argument. You are not obligated to defend your existence or change peoples bigotry. Find a good support group, and remember that there are people that are out there that will love you, without your sexuality being an exception or sticking point.

I actually find there are very learned people on tik tok and youtube who are making content defending queer people and explaining the Bible isn't homophobic, as many Christians think (people who actually can read it in the original languages, for anyone whos going to yell at me like last time), which I think can help you feel more secure when the conservative churches are tearing you down. Security in yourself and your beliefs is honestly the best defense I know. Because while you may not be able to change their minds, they don't have to change yours either.

I really hoped this helped. You are loved, and your sexuality is valid. May you have a peaceful and blessed Christmas season, with those that make you happy and safe.

[midasinc]

Jehan & Bahorel friendship headcanons? (If you want to make me *very* happy, make it cis!gnc!Jehan and non-binary!Bahorel) Also, platonic Feuilly and Bahorel headcanons?

omg id love to! i'll do platonic feuils n baz on another post so this one isn't too garbled! im gonna go for modern era because the potential is unlimited.... i actually need to read up on history so i can make historically accurate canon era hcs oh god my whole career on here is a sham

-anyway they meet through a kickboxing tournament. jehan has a bunch of random niches of interest and one of them is boxing and kickboxing alike. he's working as a ref and bahorel is one of the competitors and they have CUTE shorts and jehan makes a mental note to ask where they got it after the match, but bahorel is a fucking BEAST in the ring and jehan is aboslutely enamoured

-after the match he goes up and chats their ear off but bahorel doesn't mind and winds up chatting jehan's ear off

-they wind up exchanging numbers and they both hit it off from there

-both of them r very fond of skirts. bahorel likes short skirts and jehan loves long flowy skirts. the two go shopping a lot together because they feel safer in a pair and less judged. plus, it's nice to have someone to tell you when something is unflattering to the highest degree

-bahorel has a very masc fashion sense and wears a lot of muscle tees bc they feel like it compliments their torso, but they also can be fuckin GLAM as hell when they want to. more often than not, though, they just wear a bunch of hoodies and sweats because fashun is hard. jehan likes to take bahorel's hoodies and embroider stuff onto the cuffs of the sleeves because he says that bahorel needs at least a LITTLE colour

-they've dyed their body hair together. twice. and they are probably going to do it again.

-they also police each other's tinders. jehan will be swiping through his matches and bahorel is over his shoulder, scrunching up their nose and going "nope. nope. nope. absolutely not." jehan does the same thing. he's the one that put bahorel's profile together in the first place and as bahorel is typing a pick up line he'll snatch up their phone and go "no! do not say that!"

-they're also each other's date-follower for safety. jehan is annoying about it- he literally goes out in a wig and a fake mustache and hat and trench coat and bahorel's date is nudging them like "am i crazy or is that weird guy following us"

-both of them are super into drag. period. they go to a show at their local gay bar once a week and they're friends with all the performances

-bahorel has a locket with jehan's face in it bc one time they went on a job opportunity to berlin for six months and jehan was like "i want to be with you every step of the way...." bahorel gave him a look but they wore it every day regardless (and on the first day their boss was like "...is that a locket?")

-jehan also likes to do bahorel's makeup when they're over. it's a lot of "baz. sit still." and bahorel frowning and going "i can't sit still if you jab that in my eye every two seconds". jehan goes through a lot of makeup remover and q-tips, but practicing on bahorel gives him enough skills to practice on anyone. it's like trying to get a dog on adderall to sit still

[damnuwearperfumes]

Alrighty then.. Whatever you want.. 🚶‍♀️But y'know what? I'm confident to say that you have no rights to control how I consume media (unless *that* particular media is confirmed bigoted by a huge percentage of people—who has actually a number of valid evidences... WHO ALSO knows what they're saying)... But don't even f*cking ignore how Joshua treated other Black people who just educated them what “fujoshi” is, and why Joshua should just ignore the female audience... BUT NO, Joshua David King had to say something out-of-line to reveal what they actually are. It's back-handed, really. And sad too. Plus, this is unprofessional behaviour too, with their occupation as a voice-actor. It's also an irony they said this in Black History Month.

TW: racism.

You see, I've seen at least male Japanese BL author/s who doesn't throw a misfit whenever a percantage of female fans read their works... They don't care, because they like their audiences (Nagabe, for example, I haven't seen him getting angry for finding out there are women who read his books on his Twitter). Growing a number of audiences is what they're just focusing at, they're not staying up late to detect female fans just so they could ban them from their works—and if you think about this type of situation, it's gross is it? Why on Earth would some author ban women as their audience? They could ban YOU too, y'know? “Hurr-durr, only males can dominate the BL genre despite the fact in this world, half of the men hate gays, hurr-durr 👹”. Queer people did not fight for their rights to remove censorship, just so gay people can be expressed and seen through television and various media, and this how you're acting today? The word “yaoi” and “fujoshi” shouldn't trigger you much, man. And if you find these words uncomfortable, it's valid. Very valid, since we all have our “yes” and “ew”. But we are in a world where “block” and “mute” exists as an option inside the Internet. You don't want to read this phrase ever, but grow the f*ck up.

Also, if y'all revive this discourse multiple times, this could just result into something much worse: racism on both sides (which unfortunately happened now, and back then).

TW: usage of F-Slur and R-slur.

And, is this how far you'll treat women just so they could be prevented to read BL? This isn't you, but half of y'all act like this, and it's insane. Stripping away your morality just to insult BL fans with their non-existent “fetishism”.

Also, a question. If you ever claim majority of gay men didn't want to be “fetishized”, then why does Gr*ndr exist?

But ahh, oh well...

Edit: also, for additional stuff, y'all sound like this too..

if you think joshua david king is a misogynist for saying that hes uncomfortable with fujoshis unfollow me right now lol

[electriccenturies]

...why... why has the mcr fandom suddenly decided it's okay to call ppl slurs???

the misgendering is old news by now but the constant f*g f*ggot f*g f*g is new and AWFUL. it is NOT progressive or okay??? you get to reclaim it for YOURSELF, it is still a slur if you say it about others!!!! especially about ppl who have specifically asked you to not speculate or talk about their sexuality... and ppl who have almost certainly had that word used to hurt them.

like i cant speak about fr*nk or r*y but the w*y bros have both talked about people thinking they were gay in high school and being bullied for it. the 90s were NOT like now, it was not SAFE. that is also why ppl call m*key GNC btw since ive seen ppl complain about that. yeah what he wore is p normal NOW, but it was not back then??? you can't just remove context from things??? so yeah, m*key wearing super tight girls jeans and eyeliner and doing whatever the fuck he did to his hair back then (and even just being openly touchy feely with dudes??? like those heychris pics) WAS gnc in 2005. so, so wild to me how people have latched on to g*rard being the "true f*g of the band" or whatever when m*key was also pretty openly doing gay shit too. it says a lot about what people actually care about: making g*rard a paper doll to project onto — he was talking about YOU!!!! — rather than actually being excited to have successful, gnc, probably lgbt icons like that.

i just dont get how people can convince themselves they're being Good People and treating LGBT people well while they act like this. like trans is not a slur, she is not a slur, but it is 100% misgendering to call someone trans or she/her if they have never asked you to??? why is okay to misgender g*rard as a 'joke' but not misgender YOU?

it's because you treat transness as a joke, sorry!

[datastate]

Not sure if my ask went through the first time or not (thanks tumblr), so I'll send it again to be sure. How do you think Lurien got his spot on the spire and as a dreamer? Do you also have some fun/not so serious headcanons you wanna share?

it didn't go through the first time! thank you for sending it again tho!! :D

i will put the spire / dreamer talk in another post, but here r some misc hcs:

-> leading from the above, but! once lurien discovered aster works with engraving (through a gift, small leather 'belt' sort of thing to keep up a few of his cloaks) he allowed them to make a simple pattern upon his prostheses as well.

- i think lurien n dryya should be friends. something abt their personalities works well i feel

- lurien's telescope was crafted by monomon! she also crafted the draft of his current arm prostheses based on his input and what she gathered from his old ones (with some updates to make movement easier). while he rarely uses his old ones these days, they hold a Lot of sentimental value, and are one of the few items he doesn't allow aster to touch more than need be.

- honestly i feel like lurien's similar to me in that he realized he was gay and then was like ok! cool! [proceeds to do nothing with this for the next few years bc he has other stuff to worry abt]

- lurien has a surprising balance between practicing scenery and people, tho he still prefers scenery... it changes often, even in small ways, and he enjoys being able to capture the life of the moment. besides, on a technical level there are often more details in there anyway to mess with even when they're small, whereas w masks it does begin to feel a bit repetitive every once in a while unless he draws details within their shell as well. but. regardless, there aren't many who'd feel comfortable with removing their masks for him to try to paint, and he's not the sort to paint himself. the three statues are enough to sate his ego thank you.

-> when he was younger he'd take commissions to earn smth extra lmao

- lurien's not great with hallownest's typical nails, but enjoys wielding long, lightweight weapons. while he's no competition for dryya, hegemol still occasionally spars with him to pass the time away when she's busy.

- okay. okay. bear with me. lurien's laugh right... usually one of those soft, reserved ones where you'd cover the lower half of your face and it doesn't last long, but the amusement stays, but when he's comfortable w you it becomes really. bright? he will still tend to cover his face or tilt his head downward depending on the situation, but it's a lot clearer and while it's not loud there is a lot more emotional weight to it that he allows himself to express and i ;-;

- wow i'm gay. it's okay he is too. while there was a period of time when aster didn't live in the capital (for various reasons), sometimes, esp around the 'new year' once they were used to each other, they would spend some extra time outside of work hours. the first few times were by aster's nervous request because the stagways had closed and they wouldn't want to bother them, and a few after were lurien's hesitant offer. bro they are close friends they just want to spend time w each other when aster really has no obligation to work.

-> i've said this before but i think it'd be funny if aster occasionally debated their pay / mentioned offhand that dang lurien's going to fire them oh no oh woes whatever shall they do with lurien and while he's mortified bc I Would Not Do That To You, they're just. bestie (... mestie? mastie? watchie??? girl help) it's fine i'm well-off with the money i've already got i'm doing this work bc i like it (and i like you, but you didn't hear th--

[variabels]

what? do you even go on r/bluelock? because this is absolutely untre. I've been regularly going on it since late 2022 and it's been my main place of interaction with the BL fandom (it's honestly a really nice subreddit, especially with how big it is)

most of the subreddit is fine with ships as long as you don't shove them down their throat when they're uninterested

there was a poll once where people voted that they thought BL wouldn't be BL without all the fruitiness, some of the most upvoted posts/comments have been about ships or really zesty, Isagi harem jokes are common af, no one on thinks reo or ness are straight, people have the horniest flairs, blue lock is exclusively shortened to BL (jokes about that are common too), it's a running joke that r/bluelock and every blue lock character except adam blake is gay, it's honestly one of the few shounen subreddits to actually be fine with the concept of people being gay (shout out to r/kagurabachi for being the other one)

hell, Shidou is more popular among r/bluelock users than he is in shipping circles and most of the subreddit accepts him as gay (you'll get downvoted for suggesting he isn't), posts about people complaining about shipping also get downvoted and quickly removed the few times they appear on the subreddit, homophobia gets downvoted

like genuinely, what are you even trying to achieve with this post???

I find it fascinating how blue lock reddit fanbase act like ships are some vile shocking thing when they are in the fanbase of the manga where a guy implied he was gonna come in the middle of a match and also asked out another guy in the span of like 10minutes

[mellometal]

Hey, everyone.

If you saw the post from earlier, I had to delete it. There were things I forgot to discuss and things that didn't get saved into my drafts. Sorry if you have to see this again.

I've been WAITING to talk about Glee. Not in the good way either. There's so much wrong with the show, and it's sickening. Yes, I've watched the show last year. Against my will, but that's because of other people refusing to put on anything else besides Glee. I can say that I hate Glee with my entire being. (My initial reason for hating it was because they covered "SING" by My Chemical Romance and turned it into a slow, patriotic song when it's a song about rebellion. NOTHING about "SING" is patriotic. I hated the show since I first heard about it...for that very reason. I was like thirteen or so at the time when I first heard about Glee? Despite it being out since 2009.

Though it's been over for several years now, it's a show that many people have mixed feelings about. From what I've seen, you either love Glee or you absolutely hate it. There's no in-between that I've seen. (If you can't already tell, I hate the show.)

The show is a literal dumpster fire, the characters are all fucking awful people and all of them are poorly written, the script pisses me off, it literally makes me feel disgusting, and don't even get me started on the covers. Most of the covers aren't that good. A lot of them sound like nails on a chalkboard to me. The pacing of the show makes NO sense in certain areas (like when Blaine was initially made to be a grade above Kurt, but was then changed to be like the same grade as him so he'd stay). It just feels like everyone in the show is either a Mary Sue, a Gary Stu, their whole personality is just that they're from a minority group or they're EDGY AND HARDCORE DELINQUENTS BLEEEEHHHHH, creepy as fuck, bigoted as all hell, or they're just background characters who occasionally have the spotlight.

TW: The following post and any other posts that I'll make about this show contains subject matter that may be triggering for some audiences. It will go into subjects like racism, homophobia, ableism, outing of a person in the LGBT community, bigotry in general, statutory r@pe (between teachers and students), teachers being creepy towards students, mentioned past child m0l3stati0n and invalidation of the victim's trauma, making fun of su1c1d3, making fun of overdose, making fun of drug addiction....a lot of fucked up things.

If anything mentioned above is triggering for you, please feel free to scroll and consume safe media instead. I'd rather have you be safe than to be triggered by anything I'm gonna talk about.

Let's start off easy. The characters. It's easy to tear them apart. At least the most problematic ones.

Rachel, the Main Character™️, is textbook definition of a Mary Sue. Instead of calling her Rachel, I'm gonna call her Mary Sue for the whole post. She's almost completely perfect (like too perfect), her flaws are minor if anything, she gets all the special treatment....you get the picture. When Mary Sue does anything fucked up or she says anything fucked up, it either goes unnoticed, people make up excuses for her being a shitty person, or it gets twisted so it looks like Mary Sue is the hero! (I hate her. So much. I cannot stand her.)

Aaawwww, Mary Sue didn't want some OTHER GIRL (Sunshine) to steal HER spotlight, so she SENT THIS GIRL TO A CRACK HOUSE. A FUCKING CRACK HOUSE, OF ALL PLACES. A PLACE WHERE THIS GIRL COULD HAVE BEEN PUT IN SERIOUS DANGER. THIS GIRL COULD HAVE BEEN SERIOUSLY INJURED AT BEST AND KILLED AT WORST. Yes, I'm aware not all drug houses are the same, but still. It doesn't matter what this girl did. What Sunshine did is irrelevant. It's not okay to send people to strange places where they don't know anyone, and are put in danger, even to the point of either getting injured or killed. But it's okay, because at least it's not an "active" crack house you sent Sunshine to, RIGHT, Mary Sue? You still sent some poor girl to a place where she could have been put in serious danger, even to possibly get injured or killed, all because you didn't want her to steal YOUR spotlight. You fucking disgusting, entitled, bratty cunt. You don't need the spotlight all the time anyway. THAT'S HOW THEATRE WORKS. YOU DON'T ALWAYS GET THE LEAD ROLE. YOU DON'T ALWAYS GET THE ROLE YOU WANT. AND THAT'S OKAY. YOU WORK WITH WHAT YOU GOT. Sincerely, a theatre kid.

There are other fucked up things Mary Sue has done, but this is the one thing I could find anyone talking about. If I remember correctly, she hurt her Gay Best Friend™️ Kurt in some way. All I remember is that Kurt was mad at Mary Sue about something. Mary Sue is annoying as fuck. What else can I say about her?

Next, we have Finn, who's textbook definition of a Gary Stu. I'll call him Gary Stu throughout this post. I hate this fucker too. He's the Main Character's Boyfriend™️, the Hot Quarterback™️, and The Good Guy™️. Yet....he's not a good person. He's treated like he's a good person, but he's really not. His flaws are fairly minor and excused (and any major flaws aren't even talked about much), he's almost completely perfect, and every fucked up thing he does is ignored or is justified in some way. Like how he outed Santana as lesbian in the hallway WITHIN EARSHOT OF EVERYONE. HE DIDN'T EVEN APOLOGIZE FOR THIS.

As a woman who has struggled with her sexuality growing up, this really brought back shit I went through. I "dated" boys when I was younger to cover up the fact that I'm only attracted to other women. I wasn't happy with these guys at all. I acted like I did so nobody would suspect anything. I felt nothing for them, except for in a platonic way. I've been outed twice. Once when I thought I was bisexual with a strong preference for other women (by my dad's girlfriend at the time), and when I came out as lesbian (by my brother). It sucks to be outed. The people who outed me in real life could have put me in danger. They could have made it so I had no place to go back to. They could have had me get hurt. It's a scary feeling. Like, it doesn't matter if you're supportive or if you're in the LGBT community. You don't fucking out people without their explicit permission. You especially don't out people to their abusers or to people they don't trust, let alone out them publicly. That's what happened to me. I don't wish this on anyone.

***By the way, for anyone who's closeted, you're valid, I love you, and I know how it feels to be stuck in the closet. You don't have to come out right now. Come out whenever you're ready to. Whenever it's safe for you to do so.***

Or how about the fact that Gary Stu made fun of Kurt's voice because he's gay? Gary Stu apparently has ✨anger issues✨ and that's pretty much the excuse they use to justify him doing fucked up shit to people.

They treat the characters who are from minority groups (i.e., BIPOC, AAPI, LGBT community, disabled people) like absolute garbage, put them through all this horrific shit, or they put them on a pedestal simply for being in a minority group. The teachers and other school staff are either written to be total bigots (Sue), or they're total pr3dators (Mr. Schue, the school nurse, and another teacher who I can't remember her name off the top of my head).

Sue pretty much only exists to be a poorly written villain who's a bigoted bitch just to be a bigoted bitch. Yes, there were some things she WAS right about (like how "Blurred Lines" wasn't an appropriate song choice for the Glee Club™️, but Mr. Schue The Pr3dator™️ downplayed it). Other than that...that's all I can think of. Because everything else that came out of her mouth was bigoted bullshit. Like these right here, for example:

Or how she drugged the principal, date r@ped him, and blackmailed him?

How about them making a tasteless joke about Sue committing su1c1d3 and having her "overdose" on multivitamin gummies?

DO I NEED TO EXPLAIN HOW FUCKED UP ALL OF THIS IS? I do? Well, first of all, she called people racist, homophobic, ableist, and otherwise disgusting names. She boiled them down to their race, sexual orientation, their disability, and their appearance in general. Second, SHE DRUGGED, BLACKMAILED, AND DATE R@PED SOMEBODY. I don't think I need to explain how that's bad. The evidence is right there. Third, she said she was committing "sue-icide" by overdosing on multivitamin gummies. (Yes, you actually can OD on vitamins in supplement form, and it can cause serious symptoms and even death. Specifically with vitamins A, D, E, and K, and Iron. Vitamins A, D, E, and K are fat-soluble. They're a lot harder to remove from the body. The B vitamins and vitamin C aren't as severe if you do OD on them because they're water-soluble, but still be careful. You can't OD on vitamins and minerals you find in food. If you take supplements, vitamins, etc., only take what's on the bottle.) As someone who has su1c1d@l thoughts on and off, this is extremely insulting. Yes, I do use humor and I joke about my own experiences to cope, but this? Nah. Nothing about this is funny or cute in the slightest. Enough said.

Do I need to explain how fucking terrible it is to make light of a serious topic like this? It was never funny to see Britney Spears' mental health be at that low of a point in 2007. It was never funny to see the abuse the paparazzi inflicted on her. How the fuck was this ever okay? You can dislike Britney Spears all you want, but this was never it.

This is all I have for now. I'll probably make a part two because there are way too many things to talk about.

[hardforbenhardy]

the perfect gift | benxfem!reader

summary: the first time ben is meeting your parents, and you are nervous. but not as nervous as you are to give ben his present

warnings: intense fluff so prepare yourself coz ben is a d o r a b l e in this

based on two prompts: "that's what your wearing?" and "i tested positive"

word count: 4.5k

thought i'd do a little christmassy themed oneshot considering it was ... yakno... christmas; it’s been in my drafts for a while so there’s no better time than the present (no pun intended😊) i had fun writing this so i hope you have fun reading it! :)

Christmas had always been the same; through the 27 years of your life, you stuck to your traditions. You would always spend the time with your whole family, with the traditional Christmas roast and gift-giving. You loved it; you were extremely close with all your family, and spending time with them was always cherished since it only happened twice a year. However, there was one part that you couldn't stand. The worst part of it all was the fact that every year you were the only adult who was yet to find a relationship. All your siblings, your parents, aunt and uncles, grandma and grandpa, even some of your older cousins; they were all coupled up. You had even tried to convince them one year that you had finally found yourself a man; of course, you had simply bribed your best friend to pretend to be your boyfriend for the one day. He, however, was not as good of an actor as you thought he would be - caving in after only 3 hours in the household by accidentally spilling that he was in fact gay.

Though, this year you didn't have to pretend; you had finally found a man who you truly loved. He was the spitting image of what you considered perfection and you were sure he was the one. You and Ben had taken your relationship quite quickly, you had only been together for 10 months and yet you had already moved into a house together and adopted a small puppy. Though, you didn't see it as a particularly bad thing; you knew for certain that he was the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, the man you wanted to start a family with, grow old with. And you were also pretty certain that you were that woman for him; I mean, that's what he told you every single day. Every morning as you sat around the table to eat your breakfast; every lunch time when you'd facetime him from the office; every evening when you were snuggling in bed and he just had to mention it, which of course often led to more. You were absolutely hooked onto him, like a baby to a bottle; you simply couldn't resist him. So showing him off to your family was assuredly what you were most looking forward to this Christmas. You had already met Ben's family, and so it was now his time.

The two of you were about to leave to drive down for Christmas Eve, and the nerves were beginning to set in; what if they didn't like Ben? What if they thought you were both moving too fast? What if the nieces and nephews didn't want to play with him? What if they all took one glance at Ben and thought he could do better? You saw Ben as an angel, but you didn't know about them; after all, your mother had always wanted the perfect step-son.  She had been pretty adamant about it from the start. Nevertheless, you brushed the nerves off and paid attention to curling your hair. Your concentration was broken, however, by the sight of Ben entering the bedroom in the reflection of the mirror in front of you. You grinned widely at the sight before you, or rather behind you, as the strapping blonde man strode in wearing what you noticed to be a rather formal suit considering the fact you were only attending a Christmas dinner with your family. In fact, it was extremely formal considering the fact you were only attending a Christmas dinner with your family; meaning you couldn't help but giggle.

"That's what your wearing? Baby, we're going to my parents for Christmas, not a wedding!"

"What? I wanted to impress them!" He exclaimed rather seriously, which made you chuckle before standing up off the little stool to walk towards him to give him a small peck on the cheek; which funnily made him blush like a madman. That was something you loved about Ben; he seemed like every day he saw you was as if he was seeing you for the first time again. Somedays, he acted like a horny teenager who couldn't resist your touch. Other days, he acted like you were made of glass, as if you were the most precious, fragile thing on the earth which led to being peppered with little kisses and hugs of every form whenever he saw you. And other days, he acted like he was made of glass, and would blush or smile every time you even placed a gentle finger on him; and you had a strong feeling, this was one of those days. "I mean, what if they don't like me, or they don't think I'm good enough for their daughter? What do we do then? Because I love you, I really really love you and I want to spend my whole life with you but I can't do that if your family doesn't like me because-“

"Baby, I know they're going to love you, okay. Maybe not as much as I do, but trust me; my mum is going to take one look at you and she'll treat you like the son she never had. You look gorgeous, and as much as I am admiring the way you look in this suit, you need to change. Swap the shirt and tie out for a tshirt, and the tapered pants for some of your nice jeans." you encourage him, stroking his upper arm lightly and smiling up at his face which looked extremely defeated. You could sense the anxiety emanating from his body, he was just as nervous to meet your parents as you were for them to meet him. But you didn't tell him that, because you didn't want to worry him anymore than he already was. He simply nodded, taking a deep breath and unsleeving his arms from the blazer so that he could unbutton his shirt. You pushed his hand out the way and did it yourself, after seeing the way his hands were pretty much shaking. He still preoccupied himself, beginning to pull his trousers off to fasten the pace, as he knew you needed to set off soon to make it in time.

Once he was dressed in more appropriate clothing, which you deemed suitable for a first impression, you were finally able to leave for your parents. The car journey over there was a little less stressful, as Ben had began to calm down and forget all about his little moment in the morning. However, as you stood outside your parent's house, your own nerves began to set in. You had arrived a lot later than you expected to, having been stuck in traffic for a lot of the journey. Your hand trembled as you went to ring the doorbell, Ben stood a step behind you so that your parents would be able to greet you first. The door swung open after a few seconds, revealing the bright cheery face of your mother.

"Darling, hello! It's lovely to see you! Come in, come in!" she cheered, stepping to the side to allow you and Ben to enter. You gave her a warm hug as you walked in, in which she responded with a small kiss to your temple. Your father entered the room too, a smile emerging on his face, and you couldn't help but laugh as you noticed the apron he was wearing; it was the same one he wore every single year, with an awful christmas pun which to be honest was not a suitable apron to wear around children.

"Mum! Dad! I've missed you so much! Sorry we were late - the traffic was awful" you squealed, pulling your dad in for a hug as well, until you looked to the side to see Ben standing there incredibly awkwardly as you greeted your parents. "Mum, Dad, I'd love for you to meet my boyfriend, Ben"

"It's nice to meet you, Mr and Mrs LN. Thank you for having me, especially during a time which is meant for spending time with family" He greeted, holding his hand out to shake my fathers, but rather he pulled Ben in for a hug. You then realised you had completely forgotten to mention to Ben quite how open and friendly your family were, meaning he had quite a shocked reaction to the sudden embrace.

"Please, call us Lydia and Michael. And you are part of this family Ben; any friend of YN's is a friend of ours, lovie. Now why don't the two of you head up to your room and settle down - that way, you'll be awake in time for tomorrow morning when the kids come up and completely wreck your lie-in!" Your mum whisper-yelled, chuckling as she handed your suitcases over to your dad to help you haul them up the flights of stairs to your old childhood room that you and Ben were planning to stay in for the next two nights. Admittedly, you were a bit embarrassed considering you knew your mother hadn't changed anything about your room since you were 18 and moved out to University, so you were in for an awkward and humiliating moment when Ben first saw the posters of Roger Taylor and Queen all over your wall like you were some kind of crazy fangirl. Which, of course, you were but you didn't even think about having to explain that until now.

After a good 10 minutes of Ben laughing at your seemingly-passionate devotion to the band, you had finally settled down in your bed, which was thankfully a double. It was rather cold, being wintertime, so you and Ben were cuddled up extremely close together under bundles of blankets in an attempt to keep some warmth between you. You spent a majority of your nights curled up like this, Ben's touch providing a haven for you. And just like every other night, you ended it with the same words.

"I told you they'd love you, you practically had my mum wrapped around your finger!" You grinned, poking Bens stomach jokingly as he released a low chuckle at your point. He knew you were right, because you had mentioned that your mother was often more removed from people if she didn't like them.

"Okay, okay; I was worried for nothing, I'll admit it! But I had every right to be!" He defended himself, his warm breath on your shoulder sending shivers down your spine. You couldn't help but cuddle closer, wrapping your arms around his torso and place your head in the nook of his shoulder.

"I know, I know; I really do love you Ben"

"I love you too"

*****

You were woken by the feeling of a small body pouncing onto your stomach, shouting and cheering filling the otherwise silent room; "Aunty Yn, Unca Bwen! Wake up! It's Christmas Day! And Santa's come!"

You chuckled, partly at your nieces urgency to get downstairs and open some presents, but mainly at Ben's low groan at being woken at 7 in the morning. Your heart softened at her reference to Ben being her Uncle, and not just a random man who had joined the family for the day. You urged the 4 year old to move off you so you could climb out of bed, grabbing the dressing gown screwed up in the floor and pushing your arms through the sleeves. "Lilah, give us 10 minutes and we'll be right down, okay?"

"Okay!" She squealed, wrapping her tiny arms around your legs before running off to shout to her brother Jackson that you'd be down in "twen" minutes.

"Baby, wake up" You whispered, shaking Bens arm lightly and kissing his forehead, only to hear him grunt and roll to face the other way. "Tired"

"So am I, but it's Christmas hun; come on, I want my presents!" You giggled, giving him a shove and jumping out of bed to tie the newly-clad gown. Ben pulled himself off the mattress and lugged over to the en-suite bathroom, mumbling that he was taking a quick shower before they head down. In the meanwhile, you busied yourself with helping your mum out in the kitchen to prepare Christmas dinner.

"Is Ben not joining us this morning?"

"He's just taking a quick shower, he'll be down soon" you explained, chopping the veg; you found yourself grinning at the mention of his name. Of course, your mother noticed this.

"You seem perfect for each other, you know. He seems like a very lovely lad too; your father and I are very happy you have found yourself someone" She smiled, elbowing your side a little which made you chuckle and grin widely; you were extremely happy that your parents actually accepted Ben into the family so unquestionably, and liked him. "So when can Michael and I expect more grandchildren!"

You saw the question coming; there was no doubt that your mother loved being a grandmother to Lilah and Jackson. But they were getting older now, Jackson being 7 and Lilah being 4, and Lydia desperately wanted a baby to care for. So, your next words came like a haven to her.

"What if I have reason to believe roughly 9 months?" You mumbled, placing your hand on your stomach and looking up at your mum with nervous eyes. Her own eyes widened in shock and happiness, taking in your words.

"You mean? You're pregnant?" She whispered, not wanting the rest of the house to hear. You nodded, worried your mother would think you and Ben were moving too fast, having only been together for roughly 10 months. "Darling, oh my gosh, that's amazing! I'm so happy! Does Ben know?"

"No not yet; in fact only you know. I was planning on telling him today, and the rest of the family, but I'm seriously beginning to second guess everything; what if Ben doesn't want the baby? I mean, we're not even married and Ben is always away for press tours and filming. What if he thinks we're moving too fast? I don't want to scare him away-" You stumbled, tears beginning to brim your eyes. Whether it was the hormones or your nerves you didn't know; but it was most likely a mixture of both. Your mother hushed you, rubbing your arm in a way to calm you down as she understood you tended to over worry about a lot; and of course, this is an extremely reasonable thing to worry about.

"Lovie, look; you will not scare Ben away. I see the look of lust in that boys eyes when he looks at you, and I can tell just how much he really loves you. This is a big thing, of course it is, but you need to tell Ben; whether you plan on keeping the child or not. He deserves to know, and if he turns you away then he was never a gentleman to begin with. You have this whole family to support you the whole way, but at the end of the day; it is both yours and Bens decision" She comforted, her words calming you a little as you realised she was right. You couldn't just not tell Ben, it was his child and you were a couple. And, to be completely honest, you were excited as hell to start a family with the man you considered the love of your life. The only reason you were hesitant with this was because you and Ben had literally never spoke about having children or starting a family, so you didn't have his opinion on the matter to fall back on. The moment between your mother and you was interrupted by the man himself, hugging you from behind and pressing a small kiss to your neck.

"Hiya love, everything okay?" He muttered, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist as you continue to chop the carrots as you were before the conversation with your mother. You hummed, leaning back into his touch, hoping he hadn't heard the previous conversation between you and your mother. You felt the smile on his lips against your skin, and he tucked his head into your neck.

"Why don't you go and meet my siblings huh? I'll be in in a few minutes, just finishing up with this" You suggested, to which he nodded and placed a small kiss to your temple, before walking into the living room to join your family. You could hear the loud voices of your older brother, Sam, and his wife greeting Ben from the other room, and painfully worried that Ben wouldn't get too nervous as your brother tended to be quite boisterous at times. In fact, your whole family did; which was extremely different to Ben's family who were much more calm and collected. Although by the sight you received entering the room a few minutes later, you were immediately filled with joy; the sight of Ben sat on the living room floor, cross legged, with Lilah on his lap and Jackson sat beside him, as he read them a story Lilah had begged him to. You were a little confused as to how he was getting on with them all so well; Lilah didn't usually warm up to people so well unless she had been properly introduced. And your mum was usually very judgemental of your boyfriends that you had brought home before. And your brother was often extremely protective over you. And your sister would most likely try to steal any guy you brought home and have him for herself.

You can't help but admire the way he is around the 2 children; it's as if he's done the whole parenting thing before. Lilah was smiling so widely, you thought her face was going to get permanently stuck like that. The two were amazingly engaged as he spoke the words on the page, acting out the story with little actions and different voices,  making sound effects when needed. Your brother's wife, Sophia, walked up to you with a small grin on her face before mumbling "You've got a good one there, don't ruin it" in your direction as she passed by to enter the kitchen. At the sight before you, you realised exactly how correct she was. You had got someone in your life who you could never lose; you'd be a fool to ruin what you and Ben had. So of course, you began second guessing telling him the news once again. If you told him the truth, he may leave and then you've lost him for good. But seeing just how well he was around the children and how engaged he was, you actually considered that this was a good idea.

The time came to finally exchange presents; no doubt after the children had nagged the adults for 20 minutes straight, asking "when can we open them?". The children spent the most time opening presents, getting excited after each one and showing it off to every single adult in the room. You were sat on the small armchair; well Ben was, and you were perched on his lap, an arm around his neck and head rested on his shoulder. You were admittedly beginning to grow impatient at telling Ben the news; as much as you didn't want to tell him, waiting to do it was becoming painful because it only gave you more time to re-evaluate your decision. Thankfully, your mother had finished giving everyone her gifts, so it was the end and you could give Ben his. You rushed out of the room to where your coat hung up, pulling out a small box that was wrapped in paper and had a bow placed on the top. Ben noticed the box and furrowed his brows, even more so when you went to hand it to him.

"YN, we agreed we weren't doing presents this year?" he questioned, hesitantly taking the box from your hand, almost as if he expected it to explode in his hand. You nodded your head a little, understanding his confusion. Honestly, you forgot that you had agreed to not give each other presents this year because you had spent quite a lot of money so far on your relationship, first buying the house and then investing in a pet.

"I-I know, but you wouldn't have got any other gifts, and I think you'll like this one" You mumbled, urging him to open it and trying to hide your nerves from Ben as you knew he had a strange talent of noticing when you were hesitant to do something. He was like a human radar; he knew when you were happy, sad, angry, nervous, excited. He had a mental notebook of all your habits for each emotion, so he could probably tell that you were absolutely bricking it right now. But you assumed that he just thought this because you were nervous he wouldn't like the gift; which you were, but he didn't realise why. He took his sweet time opening the present, unwrapping it slowly considering he had all eyes of the room on him at that moment, alongside the glare of a camera that your mother had pulled out in excitement of the moment. As he opened the flaps to the small cardboard box underneath the wrapping paper, his eyes widened and his whole body froze. You can't deny, so did yours. He slowly pulled out the small stick out of the shadows of the box to reveal two small pink lines on the small screen.

"A-are you... is this real?" he mumbled, looking up to meet your eyes. You saw the tears beginning to pool at the bottom of his eyes, and you saw a glint of happiness. You nodded, awaiting his reaction.

"I tested positive."

You didn't know if this was a good reaction or a bad one because he didn't really show much emotion on his face. That was until a giant smile stretched across his face and his hands dropped the box so that he could wrap his arms around you. It was rather sudden, but he took you into the tightest hug you'd ever felt; his head rested against your shoulder and you felt the tears of joy seeping into your jumper. You obviously hugged back, relieved that he was actually happy about this.

"I-I'm gonna be a dad? W-We're gonna be parents?" He continued questioning, unable to believe any of this was true because he didn't think contentment like this could exist. You could barely speak your own words, only having the ability to nod and cry as well as Ben.  The whole family was now cheering with you, Lilah jumping on your lap to give you the biggest hug she possibly could, exclaiming that she couldn't wait to have a little cousin she could play with. Well, you assumed that's what she said, considering most of her words were indistinguishable.

"I can't believe this, this is the best day of my fucking life. God, we're gonna be parents in 9 bloody months, love. I love you so much, and you too" he gushed, tears brimming in his eyes once again and also yours. He bent down and gently kissed your practically-non-existent bump as he whispered "and you too" and you couldn't help but admire how well he took the news; you certainly didn't expect this much of a reaction from him and you felt a little stupid for ever second guessing yourself. Of course, being the bundle of nerves Ben tended to be, started questioning everything; "How far along are you? Have you been feeling ill? Because I'm sorry if I haven't been much help to make you feel better but I don't recall hearing you being sick of anything in the mornings so I don't know-"

"Ben, I've been fine so far; I'm only a month along and I've only had two instances of morning sickness, both of which you weren't home for so you don't have to worry. I suppose I've felt a little under the weather recently but nothing that I couldn't cope with." You explained, which brought comfort to Ben as he knew you weren't suffering too much in the time being. Though, he had heard of how harsh pregnancy can be for some women and he prayed to the Lord that you would not be one of the small percentage.

*****

After finding out the exciting news, Ben had been non-stop protecting you like you were a piece of glass; not that he didn't before, he just did it a lot more intensely now. Every time you tried to sit down or stand up, he would help you so that you didn't 'strain your back'. Every time you went up the stairs, he would walk right behind you. Every time you yawned, he asked if you wanted to go to bed and insisted you had an early night so that you and 'bean' were well rested. Oh yes, and he had nicknamed the growing child 'bean'. You, thankfully, now found yourself wrapped up in the covers of your duvet after a long Christmas day and could not wait to fall asleep. Ben had jumped in beside you and cuddled close so that he could rest his hand on your stomach and head on your shoulder. You were so close to being asleep, until Ben decided to create conversation.

"You know, I thought your boobs had gotten bigger, but I didn't want to mention it in case you thought I was complaining" He mumbled into your neck, which woke you up immediately. You slapped his arm and chuckled loudly, making him wince in pain a little.

"They've also gotten a lot more sore so no touching. And alongside that, I constantly need to pee, very gassy and am continually getting mood swings; so good luck for the next 9 months because you're officially dating a zombie" you countered, making him chuckle gleefully. He didn't care how disgusting or gross you may have seen yourself; you were still beautiful to him and he was going to let you know that every day.

"A gorgeous zombie who I love very very much and is literally bringing my child into the world; with my help, of course." He smirked, making you roll your eyes because you completely understood what he meant by 'his help'.

"I'm so happy that your happy and I can't wait to have a family with the love of my life"

"And I can't wait either" He grinned, feeling happiness he had never felt before in his life. Now, all he had to do was propose; luckily, he'd been planning it all along