#remembering how close u were with someone and the real love that u forget is there until something reminds you of em

[icarrymany]

while doing dishes i thought abt tim opening up to jay abt brian 💔 in just a casual way. tim would make an offhanded comment abt him and jay wants to know what he was like (both bc he definitely was not around him as much as tim and alex were and bc he doesnt remember like. anything. and brian is in so few tapes). so tim tells him how they became friends and what he liked to do. seemingly mundane stuff like his favorite food and movie always leads into a Defining Moment story. theres many things hes surprised he remembers so well. and its really nice to just appreciate what they had after mourning it. yeah.

[wildrangers]

Hello i see you're accepting fic requests, i have a matt smith fic idea, can u do a behind the scenes w matt and fem!reader where they are both married in real life but they're rivals on cam, and when the scene cuts they're like all lovey dovey and their castmates are always teasing them 💟 tysmmm!!!

Thank you so much for this request anon, I loved this idea! I created an OC HOTD character for the reader to play and kind of worked her into different key moments from the show. I hope you enjoy 🙂

Tropes & Topics: total fluff

Word Count: 900

“What would you call the husband of the Queen?”

“Well, the king-”

“There it is, then.”

“...consort” 

Your eyes met Daemon’s, fury coursing through your veins. His head tilted, eyes assessing you. “That seems redundant, no?”

“I speak for the Queen when I say it is not.” 

There was a long pause as you two stared each other down before “CUT! Good work you two.”

“Darling! You were stupendous” Matt praised, walking towards you with his arms raised. Mostly joking groans sounded from the crew around you. “Oh, stop it you lot.”

“I always forget how angry you make me when you have that fucking wig on” you tease, wrapping your arms around his middle tightly. 

“I could say the same to you, my love” he chuckled, pressing a chaste kiss to the top of your silver wig.

Your role on House of the Dragon was Anora, a close confidant and cousin of Rhaenyra. Given your character’s fierce loyalty to Rhaenyra, she shared a tense, often hostile, relationship with Daemon which you two delighted in playing as it was so opposed to your real-life dynamics as newlyweds. 

“Are you love birds ready for lunch now that you’ve terrorized the crew?” Emma’s voice called from behind Matt and you threw a grin their way. 

“Are they up to it again?” Harry seconded from behind them. 

“I don’t know what you’re referring to” you argued and Matt chuckled beside you, his arm resting along your shoulders as you followed the pair off the studio lot. 

“Oh, so you don’t remember the post-wedding incident?” Emma posed and you felt your face warm as the memory flooded your mind. 

“Wed?! Laenor has just died!” you shouted, whipping around to face your best friend and her apparent new husband. 

“No, cousin, he’s not dead. We arranged it so he could be free and we could marry” Rhaenyra explained and your eyes widened. 

“You let our monstrous uncle convince you of this?!” 

“Watch your tongue” Daemon replied, eyes blazing.

“Or what?” 

“Or I’ll take it.”

You took out the dagger you kept hidden on your side, “Well come on then, Daemon. You don’t frighten me.” 

“Enough!” Rhaenyra screamed, stepping between you both. “Cousin, this was my decision he forced me to do nothing. He wants to better support my claim to the throne when the time inevitably comes.” 

“He will be your ruin, Rhaenyra. Mark my words.”

“CUT! I think we got it guys, take five.” 

“My fierce wife!” Matt cheered, picking you up and swinging you around as you laughed. 

“Must you do this every take?” the director questioned, earning laughs from the cast and crew on set. 

“Am I wrong? She was incredible” he praised, placing you down and lovingly straightening the wig he’d disheveled in his excitement. 

“Yes, yes, your wife is brilliant and we’re all lucky to be graced with her presence” Emma teased and you stuck your tongue out at them. 

“The most brilliant one of us is you, my love” you tell him and are met with another chorus of groans as you giggle and squeeze his hand in yours.

“Oh! And you can’t forget the birthing scene from last season’s finale, that one was iconic.” Harry added and Emma eagerly nodded their agreement.

Rhaenyra wailed from the bedchamber behind you as you charged after Daemon. “What are you doing Daemon? She needs you!” 

“She needs someone to prepare for war, I can do nothing for her in that room.” 

“She’s calling for you Daemon, not me! She doesn’t want you to act on her behalf, just to be her husband.” 

“I am your king now!” he roared, turning around so quickly you slammed into his chest, his hands gripping your shoulders painfully to keep you upright.

“You overstep Daemon. You are no more than her king consort” you replied, adjusting your stance and fighting the wince of pain wracking your system.

Matt’s face completely broke, false anger draining from it, “Love, are you alright? I’m sorry everyone but she’s injured, we have to cut.” 

“Matt, it’s fine I could have finished the scene” you insisted but your argument fell flat as your ankle rolled out from beneath you. 

He didn’t hesitate, one arm gripping under your knees, the other under your arms to lift you off your feet. “Where’s the medic?!” 

“Matthew, it’s a twisted ankle, not a mortal wound” you assured but his face was panicked. “Hey, look at me” you said firmly, hand cupping his cheek. His hazel eyes met yours and you could see him fighting to control his fear that you were seriously injured. 

“I’m not putting you down until someone’s looked at your ankle” he insisted and you nodded your agreement. “I’m so, so sorry darling.”

“It was an accident, I’m fine, I promise” you replied, pulling his face down to yours for a brief kiss. 

“We have to release this as a blooper, the fans will eat it up!” you heard Emma call as Matt carried you off set towards the medic tent with the cameras still rolling.

“How could we forget? It went absolutely viral” Matt groaned and you laughed, pinching his side.

“You’re lucky you didn’t get charged with spousal abuse” you tease and he rolls his eyes as the others laugh. 

“Keep it going, I’ll just save up my annoyance with you for when we’re back on set.”

matt smith taglist: @slayraxes-blogs @littlehorrorlover

I'm always happy to hear any feedback, message me if you want to get added to the taglist! I have a few more asks waiting that will be out soon 🫶🏻

[azriels-shadowsinger]

Confessions (Azriel x Reader)

summary: you and azriel are best friends, but his flirting with elain has become too much for you to bear, so you decide to try to move on.

wc: 3k

a/n: !!warning: mentions attempted SA!! This is the first real fic i have written in years so it’s probably shit but if you decide to read this thank u and i love u.

Read Part Two

For months now, you have been fairly upset about seeing Azriel pining after Elain, but even more annoyed that your friendship with him has become insignificant to him now that he spends all his time with her. About a decade ago, you decided that being hopelessly in love with Azriel was pointless since he would never see you that way, so you settled for friendship. It’s better to have him as a friend than not at all… or at least that’s what you’ve been telling yourself. Mor is the only one who knows about your crush and has kept your secret, but not without constant pestering to tell him how you feel.

“He’s in love with Elain, Mor. I’m over it and over him. I’m ready to move on.” You lie as best you can to her and to yourself.

“You’re so full of shit. But fine, I’ll play along. When we go out tonight, you’re finding someone to go home with!” She says excitedly while finishing her eyeliner. Mor forced you to put on a tight, navy party dress that barely covers your ass instead of letting you wear your go-to little black dress.

After she finishes getting ready, the two of you head down to your room to grab your lipstick, but when you open the door to the hallway, you see Azriel and Elain at the end of the hall whispering and standing only inches from each other. You ignore the ache in your chest at the sight and turn the opposite direction to head to your room, refusing to look behind you when you feel a pair of eyes staring at you.

———

Rita’s was crowded, as per usual. After about an hour of drinks and dancing, you were decently drunk and had forgotten all about Azriel… well almost.

“Can I buy you a drink?” You hear a male say from beside you. He’s tall and fairly handsome, but nowhere near Azriel’s level of attractiveness- damnit you need to get him out of your head!

“Sure. I’ll have what you’re having.” You try to say seductively, but it just comes out awkward. Gods, when was the last time you tried to flirt? He chuckles and orders your drink. Mor gives you a wink from across the bar and disappears into the crowd with a stranger.

After a while of talking, you decide this guy, Mikael, is exceptionally boring, but the night is almost over and he’s your only option. Anything to forget a certain dark and mysterious shadowsinger. Why not try to have fun?

“Do you want to come back to my place?” Mikael whispers in your ear. No reaction. If Azriel had been this close and whispered something to you, you would be all goosebumps and blushes, but with Mikael… nothing. Fuck, this is probably a bad idea. Maybe you should just go home and try again another night.

“Y/n?” His voice pulls you out of your daze. “I asked if you wanted to get out of here.” He says a bit annoyed while sliding a hand up your thigh. Gods, this guy is kinda an ass. This is definitely a bad idea.

“Um… I’m pretty tired. And I came here with a friend, so I should probably find her to make sure she gets home safe.” You slowly stand from your chair to leave. You immediately stumble and feel much dizzier than before. You were never good at handling your liquor, and apparently tonight was no exception… except you don’t remember drinking enough to feel this drunk. Mikael’s hand grabs your shoulder to stabilize you, but his grip feels too tight and he doesn’t let go once you balance yourself.

“Cmon honey. We were having a fun night, let’s keep it going.” He leans too close for comfort, giving you a slimy grin. You pull away and stumble back.

“I really should find my friend. I’m sorry!” You say nervously and look around for Mor. She’s nowhere in sight. Shit. She probably either left with that girl thinking you were gonna go home with Mikael or she’s lost in the crowd. Either way, you just need to get away from Mikael. You stumble towards the door, feeling dizzy and seeing double. Each step feels slower and heavier than the last, but you finally step outside, savoring the winter chill that will hopefully sober you up. Just as you take a step outside, you feel a hand grab your wrist too hard and pull you towards the alley next to Rita’s.

“I spent a lot of fucking money on your drinks tonight, so I’m not gonna ask again. You’re coming home with me.” Mikael’s whiskey breath is inches from your face, making you want to gag. You want to scream for help. You want to kick and fight back, but your body feels weak and your vision keeps getting blurrier. After a moment, you slump onto Mikael and he helps you walk down the sidewalk. To everyone else, you probably look like a drunk girl whose boyfriend is helping her home.

No. No no no. You need to get away. You need someone to notice you aren’t okay. How the fuck did this happen?

You hear a voice behind you and your feet stop moving. It’s too blurry and dark to see, but soon you’re on the ground and someone is yelling. You shut your eyes, accepting whatever horrible thing is about to happen to you. But suddenly you are in someone’s arms, and a moment later you’re inside somewhere. You open your eyes, and despite the blurriness, you recognize your blue curtains. You’re home. Somehow.

Mor must have found you and winnowed you home. Thank the gods for that. You are set on your bed and covered you with blankets.

“Thanks… thanks for finding me, Mor.” You slur and curl into your blankets. “I think that guy… put something in my drink.” Your voice trails off as you become incredibly sleepy and shut your eyes. Mor sits you up and forces you to drink some water. Your eyes feel too heavy to open, so you keep them shut.

“Just… don’t tell Azriel about this. It’s embarrassing enough to go looking for a quick fuck to get over my crush, but it’s even more embarrassing to get fucking drugged by someone in the process.” You get the words out slowly between sips. Thinking about everything that just happened tonight should make you want to cry and vomit, but you’re too tired to do so. When you finish the water, you lay back down and immediately fall asleep.

———

Your head is pounding and the sun is shining too bright. Someone is yelling outside your door. You roll over in bed, half expecting to see some male, but thankfully you are alone in your room. You don’t remember much from last night, but apparently your attempt at a one night stand was unsuccessful. Probably for the best.

The yelling gets louder.

“She was on the fucking sidewalk outside Rita’s!” You hear a male voice yell. Azriel’s voice. Why is Azriel here? And why is he so damn loud?

You slowly make your way out of bed and to the door so you can tell him to shut up, but as soon as you open the door, you see several worried faces staring back at you. Mor, Rhys, Cass, Feyre, and Azriel all stare at you. Mor looks like she’s crying and Azriel is red in the face with a murderous expression.

“Can you all shut up? I have a head-“ you start

“Y/n I’m so sorry!” Mor hugs you tight, almost knocking you over.

“What the…” you start to question before you’re cut off again.

“Do you know his name, y/n? I’ll make sure he is taken care of.” Rhys asks. His voice is gentle, but his face is full of anger.

“Like hell you will. I would’ve killed him last night if I didn’t have to get her back here. I should’ve fucking killed that piece of garbage.” Azriel mutters.

What the hell is going on? You pull away from Mor and face the group.

“Does anyone care to tell me what we’re talking about?” You ask cautiously while rubbing your temples in an attempt to alleviate your headache.

“Of course she doesn’t remember you guys. Give her some space.” Feyre says softly and leads you back inside your room with Mor. The three males protest, but Feyre gives them a stern look and shuts the door. “Sit down, y/n. I’ll tell you what’s happening.”

You sit on your bed and look between Feyre and Mor anxiously.

“You were found outside of Rita’s being carried by a stranger and you were close to unconscious. You’ve been asleep for almost the entire day now.”

You stare back in stunned silence. The memories slowly start to return, but before you can ask a question Mor starts tearing up again.

“You don’t know how sorry I am y/n. You were hitting it off with that guy and next thing I knew, you were gone. I thought you went home with him like you planned, but when Azriel told me-“

“Azriel? Wait… what?” You ask.

“Azriel found you and brought you back here. He made sure you were safe before finding me and going ballistic on me for not watching out for you. I’m so sorry I really didn’t mean to let you get hurt!” She cries again.

“I don’t understand. I vaguely remember someone bringing me home, but I could’ve sworn it was you, Mor, not Azriel.” They both shake their heads. You sit silently and process the information for a minute before saying the only thing that may be helpful in this moment.

“His name was Mikael. He had dark hair, hazel eyes, and wore a red shirt.” You whisper, still in shock. Feyre’s eyes glaze over for a moment as she relays this information to Rhys. Suddenly its completely quiet outside your door.

———

You spend the rest of the day in your room, still exhausted and fighting a hangover. Or the after effects from the drug… not sure. There’s a soft knock at your door.

“Come in.” You call out. Azriel slowly opens the door and walks in. You can tell he just got back and tried to clean up quickly, but there’s still a few smears of blood on him.

“Uh… hi.” You say awkwardly and motion for him to sit. Azriel sits on the end corner of your bed and looks at you with a mixture of anger and fear in his eyes. His shadows are swirling around you, as if to check that you are actually okay. They’ve always taken an interest in you, which you normally appreciate, but right now it just makes you feel guiltier for last night.

“Thank you for finding me last night. I probably wouldn’t be okay right now if you hadn’t.” You whisper, avoiding his gaze. He takes a deep breath, like he is trying to control himself.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” He mutters angrily. Azriel stands and starts pacing the room. “You could’ve been fucking killed!” He raises his voice.

“I know. I didn’t-“

“And then you go and say… fuck y/n!” He runs his hands over his face in frustration.

“I’m sorry, Az.” You whisper, fighting the tears that are building. Wait, why the hell is he mad at you? You didn’t drug yourself. “Azriel, it’s not like I planned for this to happen.” You say a bit annoyed. He lets out a cold laugh.

“Yeah, but you planned on going out to find someone to fuck. Wearing that fucking dress and letting that fucking worthless filth touch you.” He spits out angrily as his shadows swirl around your ankles.

“Okay look, I can do what I want and wear what I want. Why is it any of your business if I try to hook up with someone?” Your eyes burn and you fight the tears. “Obviously I wasn’t expecting someone to put something in my drink. I’ll be more careful next time!” You yell louder.

“Next time?” His voice drops to a whisper and he looks at you with an expression you can’t quite decipher.

“I don’t have to justify my actions to you, Azriel. Why do you even care? You’re never around anymore. Always too busy sneaking off with Elain to hang out with your best friend!” Hurt fills your voice. You hadn’t meant to let that last part slip out.

“Why are you bringing her into this?” His voice drops lower and his brow furrows.

“She has a mate, Azriel! What the hell are you doing?” You sigh and put your head in your hands. “I just miss you.”

He stops pacing and stares at you. “I’m right here. I haven’t gone anywhere.”

“Yes you have! I never see you anymore!” Its true. He never makes plans with you anymore and it has been tearing you apart. It’s strange that he was even at Rita’s in the first place, because he never wanted to go even before he ditched you for Elain. Wait, why was he there? “You were at Rita’s last night when you found me.” It’s not a question.

He nods.

“Why were you there?” He obviously wasn’t expecting you to ask that because panic flashes in his eyes for a brief moment. “I know you weren’t there with Elain because she hates it there. And I didn’t see you inside with the guys.” I try to remember him outside the bar, but it’s all fuzzy.

“I was worried.” He mutters so quiet you barely hear.

“What?”

“I was worried about you y/n!” You look at him surprised. “I saw you in the hall ready to go out in that dress. God, that fucking dress. And the entire night I kept thinking about something bad happening. So I waited outside to make sure you and Mor were safe. And then I saw that fucking piece of shit with his hands on you and I just…” he trails off and takes a deep breath. “If something had happened to you… if I hadn’t been there to stop it…” His expression looks angry again.

You pause and process his words. He almost sounds jealous. But that can’t be it. Because he has no reason to be jealous.

He sighs again and continues with a softer voice. “Do you remember anything after you left?” He asks with a hint of desperation in his voice. You think hard for a moment. You thought Mor got you home and you told her what happened. But it wasn’t Mor. It was Azriel. And then you said not to tell Azriel because… fuck. Your eyes go wide.

Azriel stalks closer and is inches from you. “Do you remember what you said? Was that the drug talking or you?” He whispers low and gets closer, his eyes searching yours for an answer. This cannot be happening. If you thought your friendship was screwed before, this is definitely the final straw.

“Az…” you whisper.

“Tell me.” His voice is demanding.

“I don’t-“ you start, but Azriel turns and runs his hands over his face in frustration. He stays facing away from you, muttering something to himself.

“Azriel, I cant. You already avoid me as it is. I don’t think I can handle losing you as a friend. Losing you completely.” He obviously already knows, but saying it feels too real. Your words cause him to turn back around and get closer to you. Azriel leans over you, caging you against the bed in between his arms and stares at you silently for a moment. His shadows have stilled completely around you two. There’s something desperate in his eyes. He’s so close, closer than he has been in months. Hell, he’s closer than he’s been ever. You look from his eyes to his lips for a split second, mesmerized by the way he barely bites his bottom lip.

“Fuck it.” He mutters. Before you can ask what, he crashes his lips into yours. You freeze for a moment in shock, before melting into his touch. He lets out a low groan as you wrap your arms around him and pull him closer. His calloused hands wrap into your hair and tug slightly, earning a small whimper from you. It takes several moments before you come up for air.

“Azriel… I don’t understand.” You ask breathlessly.

“Please tell me what you said last night is true. That you feel the way I feel.” He rests his forehead on yours.

“What about Elain?”

“I don’t care about Elain! I care about you! She knows that I’m in l-“ He pauses and takes a breath. “I was trying to get over you.” He grabs your chin softly and pulls your face to meet his. “It’s always been you, y/n. Please.”

You stare silently in shock for several moments. “Y/n…” Azriel’s voice pulls you from your trance and you realize he’s waiting for you to answer.

Just as you are about to respond, there is a knock on the door. Azriel quickly pulls away and sits on the edge of the bed away from you, as if nothing were happening.

“Come in!” You call out softly, and Feyre opens the door holding a plate of food.

“I should go.” Azriel says quietly and heads towards the door.

“Wait.” You try to stop him, but he keeps walking.

“I’m just glad you’re okay, y/n.” Azriel opens the door and leaves without a second glance. His shadows remain for a moment, before quickly retreating, as if being called to follow. Feyre gives you a questioning look, but you just shake your head and fall back onto the bed, finally letting the tears flow freely.

thank you for reading!! :)

Read Part Two

[evieelyzabethh]

Hey can u do a spike smut

I have another Spike smut fic coming so I'm gonna use this to drop my sfw and nsfw Spike headcannons because fun fact, the buffy brain rot is real and I have over 100 pages of buffy reboot material. anyways...

warning: not proofread

sfw:

Spike purely smokes because he thinks it makes him look cool. I think when it comes to vampires, they either physically cannot feel the effects of drugs or are lightweights. He hates the smell of smoke, hence the duster jacket, and refuses to smoke in his crypt because of the shit ventilation

Speaking of smoking, William was most definitely asthmatic. He had no friends in boys school because too much physical movement sent him wheezing. He did enjoy horseback riding though

He has poetry stashed somewhere, I just know it. Under some slab of rock or rolled in some random alcohol bottle pirate style, it's somewhere.

Spike would love an English major or anyone who has a hobby aligned with creative writing. This doesn't mean he'd automatically show you anything he's written but he'd be more open to the possibility sooner rather than later.

Very picky with what he steals/wears. He will not just put any old rags on. He dressed Drusilla and he is a fashion icon and I stand by that

As for him with a partner, I do think he is the type to fall first and incredibly hard

I think how familiar you are with one another would dictate a lot. If you were a Scooby, I wouldn't say he'd keep his distance, but he wouldn't be super outright with his affection. There'd be some playful banter here and there, dare I say some flirting, and maybe even some gift-giving every now and again. He's like a crow, he'd be the type to drop things on your windowsill just because it reminded him of you

If you two didn't know each other, he'd most definitely be the stalking type. Every time you're walking home from school, there WILL be a dark figure following you around. You're getting harassed by some rando? If you paid attention to the newspaper, you'd see they mysteriously went missing. You can go from eyeing something while window shopping to it magically ending up on your doorstep

Never the one to make the first move. He wouldn't say a word unless he was 100% confident that you liked him back, and even then, there'd be a lot of hesitation

He would love a forward partner. Someone who makes his insecurities melt away and who he doesn't have to worry about them ever getting over him. When he loves, he loves forever. He has all of time to love you and his ideal partner would be someone who wants to spend all of time with him

He is such a romantic!!! I think he would be so into matching couples costumes or just matching outfits in general. Super into domesticity wherever he can get it, decorating a home together, cleaning together, cooking together, doing anything together

Since he can't have a job, I do see him being a house husband. It gives him something to do during the day. Wears a 'kiss the cook' apron and pouts if you don't give him kisses while wearing it. I headcannon that he spent time all over Europe, including France, and had some really good pastries at some cafe that closed like 200 years ago and made it his life's mission to recreate them. The grocery bill is high but it makes him happy

Valentine's Day is his absolute favorite holiday and he makes a big deal of outdoing himself every year. Not in terms of money or extravagance, but meaning. He treats every day as a new one to know more about you. It's not enough to know your favorite color, he needs to know the exact shade, exact hue, and exact context you love it in. He knows your allergies, remembers your favorite outfits, and keeps track of your cleaning habits so he can make everything shiny and new when you forget yourself. He becomes a master of all trades to make you whatever you want exactly how you want it

He does really like Halloween, too. He's a huge fan of the Scream movies. He dislikes when horror movies try too hard. Being so used to gore, blood, and guts, he prefers a funnier, more unserious scary movie

Speaking of blood, he starts out against drinking from you. He used to only do it to kill someone, or at least with the intent to cause harm. He didn't trust himself not to get overwhelmed and hurt you. But I feel like at some point he either gets hurt on patrol or his stash gets low and you both forgot to restock and he has to. It was a very close call, and he couldn't bring himself to even look at you after the fact. He only warms up to it if it's necessary. He avoids it, but there are always slip-ups. He has bitten you during sex a few times when he got a bit too into it. He says he refuses to do it unless it's for your pleasure

He is so obsessed with you, if you couldn't tell. You're his favorite person, favorite scent, favorite taste. Not to be slightly yandere on main, but he would kill for you and kill himself if he wasn't enough for you. Never leave you. Never hurt you. Spike would never.

nsfw:

He is neither an ass or tits guy, he's just a 'you' guy. Absolutely everything about you gets him going. You think it's funny at first until you're trying to eat a bowl of spaghetti and he's staring at you, hard. It's not his fault the stray sauce around your lips looked like blood and vampire you is a very hot concept to him

You guys have to own a house. The noise complaints would be too much and you'd get evicted. I do see him as more of a groaner than a moaner, but sometimes it's just too much and it's both. Sometimes it's just one hand gripping the pillow your head is resting on, the other on the headboard, and his head in the crook of your neck practically whimpering as you milk his cock

You also have a tendency to get pretty loud, and as much as he loves your voice, his super vampire hearing can't take it sometimes :(

Doesn't really matter the position, but it's hard and he's so big. You can feel him in your damn ribs and it's choking you up. You don't even realize how loud you are. It's not until you hear his raspy voice in your ear. "I know, love, I know. It's a lot, but I need you to be a bit quieter. You're hurting me." And you pout a bit and try to mumble apologies that just sound like gibberish. You try, futilely, but surely he must understand that you can't help it. Not when it's this good. He whispers again, rubs where your belly bulges from his dick, but it doesn't seem to work. He eventually flips you over to shove your head in the pillows and you were far too out of it to complain. You like it a bit rough anyway.

As mentioned previously, he is a biter. He can't help it, it's instinct honestly. Its not like you mind, you clench even harder when he does. The sudden smell of iron is drowned out by the stench of sex and sweat, and the piercing feel of his fangs into your neck only stings for a bit. He makes up for it by licking up whatever spills <3 Being with a vampire was always going to be at least a little painful

He likes his hair pulled. You're fingers in his hair in general is heaven on earth, but being pulled around a bit is nice

Has a thing for tearing your clothes off. He really does like being a vampire, feeling big and strong in a way he was never able to when he was human. There is a feral piece of him, maybe its the demon inside him or it was always present, but seeing your clothes in pieces after the fact just scratches the itch in his brain

Speaking of brain, enjoys giving and receiving head equally. Being absolutely obsessed with you, and very secretly obsessed with the taste of your blood, he could die happily with your cum on his lips. Between your legs is his favorite place for real. As for receiving, it's his favorite way of shutting you up in any scenario.

Bruises. Everywhere. Hickeys. Everywhere. He's possessive but not exactly an exhibitionist, they end up along your collarbones and your thighs. Places where they can easily be hidden or revealed

Plays old music because he's old. He refuses to use modern technology because he likes his old as dirt aesthetic but definitely plays sexy orchestral music. I simply do not believe him to be an RnB kinda guy

He likes seeing you in his clothes after!! Going back to the whole love for domesticity thing, it just feels right. He's, shockingly, not always a horny fuck in the morning. Sometimes it feels more right to just look at you, the pretty after sex glow on your face, your messy hair, your cheeks pressed into the pillow. If you get up before him and put on what he had on the night before, it just completes the picture.

When he is a horny fuck in the morning, it's still just as soft and slow as the non-sexual mornings. He likes to be the big spoon simply because it's easier to slide his dick between your thighs and hold your tits at the same time

[stayconnecteed]

🪐˓⠀˚⠀lowkey⠀@⠀lee know.

about: drabble request by @vanillacupcakefrosting (thank u for being the first ♡) 一 "lee know... something a little naughty?", lowkey by bm (kard).

SEE MORE.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀915 words. ⠀⠀general mlist.⠀⠀join taglist.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀smut ★ mentions of biting / neck kisses, chocking, mirror sex (mentions of oral sex - both him and her reciving, but not described).

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀plot ★ minho's thoughts on a party + the after party in his room.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀credits ★ mdni banner by @cafekitsune.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀warnings ★ if any under 18 acc interacts with this fic i'll block them.

⠀⠀⸺⠀⠀author's note ★ i hope you like it!! no proofread, i don't even know what have i done ajsdhjasd

The thing Minho liked most about you was your innocent appearance. There was something about the curious way you watched everything, your big eyes taking in every detail, a shy smile tugging at your lips. And it was something that drove him crazy. Even at that moment, sitting on the couch in his own apartment, some of his friends around him having a conversation he'd already lost track of, he didn't let you out of his sight. You were right in his field of vision, the tight leather skirt hugging your hips, which moved almost of their own to the soft music as you talked to your best friend. He adored your angel aura, delicate and naive, at his total mercy.

When he had met you, everyone had told him about how gentle and kind you were, always looking out for those you cared about, the typical person who listens to you when you are talking and someone interrupts, a soft smile plastered on your face, always there, like a constant of joy in the group. And he had seen you, and had thought you were the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his life. The crush had been instantaneous, but somehow he didn't remember any physical traits he could point to: all he could think of was your electrifying energy, the smell of your shampoo, that he had lost himself in your essence, and it was why all those little imperfections you thought you had had seemed insignificant to him.

If there was one thing that attracted him, though, it was the certainty he had that it was all a facade. You were a lovely person, it was true, but in the intimacy of his room you had proven time and again that not everything you let on was the real you. That defiant look you gave him with your chin up while he plopped down between your legs, eager to taste you. The mischief-filled smile you would flash just before licking his cock, knowing that every little movement of yours had him on edge. And most of all, the sighs and whimpers you'd spill onto his sheets as he buried his hips in you, shivering when your wetness received him. You were an angel ーhis angelー but with a single glance you managed to turn Minho into a real sinner.

His favorite part of the parties he organized in the apartment he shared with Felix was when you got bored. He would see you say goodbye to those around you, after having danced for hours, and walk the few meters until you ended up sitting on his thighs, feigning a tiredness you didn't feel, to whisper in a choked voice a "Let's go" in his ear, leaving it to him the part of mumbling a excuse that would allow him to chase you to his room. He loved to close the door behind his back and discover you lying on his bed, staring at him with heat in your eyes, whining that you needed him, that he had to do something, now, or you would lose your mind.

And after that nothing mattered anymore but having you in his arms, caressing your skin with a soft touch, or biting your flesh, leaving marks that could be seen, using his tongue, or his fingers, or whatever it took to fuck you dumb on his mattress, so bad that you wouldn't remember anything but him, that you'd forget even your name. Until he made eye contact with himself in the mirror you had bought a few weeks ago, his forehead with a light layer of sweat, breathing hard, lost in you, and forced you to your knees, his hand wandering from its place between your legs to your neck, closing his fingers around it, and made you look at yourself.

With your chest pressed against the sheets, and your gaze glued to the mirror, Minho began to move his hips again, stifling his own moans as he bit his lip, just so he could hear better the sounds you were making, whispering how you had made him feel all through the party, with that damn skirt, and your dance, always pushing him to the limit when you decided to approach someone that wasn't him. And you watched him, his reflection making you weak, with the almost possessive way he grabbed your hips to fuck you back to him, closing his eyes so he could feel how good you felt around him, his hand squeezing at just the right moment, your body reacting to his experience, greedy.

And when he noticed you were closer, then he opened his eyes, his cheeks flushing as he met your gaze with his, and he lifted you up to pull you back to his chest, pressing his lips to your shoulder, kissing and nibbling as much skin as he could, you crying out and throwing your head back, he felt it. When you let him decide how much air went into your system, when you trusted him like that, looking up at him with crystallized eyes, babbling about "I'm yours, yours, yours, baby- hah, yours to do whatever, fuck, whatever you want with me", when you offered yourself to him because you knew he would put your pleasure and safety above his, it was then that he felt he loved you.

He knew he loved you, but he tried to repress it. They made him feel somewhat insecure, the magnitude of his feelings, the way he loved you, irrevocably, desperately. And it was too soon. But he would tell you. At some point. He thought that too, after you both finished, when you murmured how much you had enjoyed it, that you had to do it again, when he stroked your skin with a damp cloth to clean you up, when he watched your features relax as you drifted off to sleep. He'd trace a tired but satisfied smile, kissing your forehead with affection, and whisper a faint "I love you", just like every night he spent by your side, noticing how you snuggled against his chest, hoping that someday you'd hear it, unaware that you always woke up earlier the following day, and whispered the same thing.

© stayconnecteed 2024 ★ do not copy, translate, repost or share this work as yours on other platforms ! consider leaving a comment or reblogging.

[norrisreads]

better than revenge #PG10

PAIRING: pierre gasly x reader! Charles leclerc x reader! Platonic

SUMMARY: a part 2 of set fire to the rain, what happens when pierre gasly comes back running in to your life after all the heart break that he caused you? will you take him back?

WARNING: angst & fluff

FC: roses_are_rose on ig

you pointed to where kika was standing, both kika and your eyes were wide, taken aback from pierre’s statement.

Charles, was steps behind from pierre and approached you making sure you’re okay not knowing the current situation were super tense.

you broke the silence, “pierre, let’s talk”

Charles walked away with kika, while you dragged pierre into your hotel room that was shared with Lissie.

You offered him a glass of water, “room’s a mess, but we need to talk about what happened. Kika told me the situation between both of you, care to explain?”

“I missed you, when you left, charles and i had a talk about our relationship, and i have slowly started to regret how i was neglecting you during our relationship.

Kika’s and I relationship were never meant to be serious, but eventually it had and every night i was still thinking about us. How we would have been right now, if i didn’t neglect our relationship.”

both of you sat side by side, and you had failed to noticed how pierre was tearing up until u felt drops of tears fell on to the back of your palm, that was caressing his hands (to be fair you were trying to calm him down)

Lissie had told you multiple times that you were just too kind for anyone in this world, and this gesture speaks a-lot because no women on this earth would be in this situation with their nasty ex-boyfriend

you were out of words because you’ve never realised you would be encountering this experience that was usually seen in televisions.

To be fair, pierre made you realise that your life was much more worthy. 70% of the moments that was spend with him was what made you the women you are today.

you had remembered times when you were close to giving up on your education but pierre took his time off schedule, he would face-time after the weekend races to accompany you pull an all nighter, you’ll wake up with breakfast in bed, assurance were given to you without being asked.

eventually, you let out a huge sigh

“Pierre, there’s a saying that ‘your first love is hard to forget because it leaves an 'imprint' on the sensory areas of your brain’ and i’ve always thought of you, i tried going on dates after our separate ways, but i couldn’t just give it a try because you’re always there, do you know that?”

you looked up at him, pierre wanted to say something but you weren’t finished

“i’ll think, oh pierre would have done this for me? oh pierre would have loved this? every single time a guy tried to do moves on me. Eventually, i got rid of that thought after 7 months. Well yeah, still no boyfriend but i’m happy that you were my first love. You’ve taught me so much and that so much was things that i could’ve only known because i was with you.”

you felt a tear roll down your cheeks, maybe tomorrow when you’re awake you’ll regret opening up your heart to someone who once had it.

“I’m sorry, y/n, i really am, but let’s just try for the second time and if this really does not work out, i’ll leave you alone”

that was real selfish of him, because here he is begging you to take him back but kika’s out there suffering the same heartbreak you were in 7 months ago.

“solve things out with kika, pierre. You both were in love too, special memories were made too, assure her and let her know what you’re really feeling and maybe get back to me?”

you smiled at pierre and he nodded his head, while walking himself out of your hotel room

You’ve finally reached the imola grand prix, and here you are with Lissie and charles in charles driving room. With you always being around Charles, ferrari allowed you full access.

“have you thought on what you’re gonna say to pierre?” charles asked you while you were pacing back and forth in his driver room

“no, charles! i’m scared what if he had the talk with kika, and suddenly wants me back in his life? i can’t just drop the 7 months that i was suffering because of him, just because i loved him too much”

your head was in your hand because it has been on your mind ever-since the conversation with pierre happened

charles knew how in love with pierre you were, when both of you had freshly broken up you’ll get drunk most of the time and would lead to you drunk calling him, most of the time crying.

Pierre came to charles multiple times regarding this exact situation, as much as charles hates that pierre was the cause of your huge heart break but pierre and you was his closest friends and he knew the impact pierre had on you.

“Well, just accept him back in to your life then”

Lissie added on, “if you’re thinking about it, that speaks alot. You clearly want him back, as much as i disliked him, if he makes you happy, we’re happy with it”

“Or you could just find another driver to date….?” now this was a voice you would not expect to join the conversation you’re having

“Carlos…? How much did you heard?”

“Not much, but walls are thin here, i didn’t know you ended things with pierre that way, but what i was saying is, there are other people here who would die to be with you and would treat you much better than how pierre treated you, but why do you care anyways? i’m pretty sure the pierre’s impact is still on to you”

Carlos and Charles laughs, which made you rolled your eyes

“i don’t know guys, will it be healthy for me? that’s the question i’ve been asking”

“not all relationships are supposed to be healthy for you. yeah there may be ups and downs, but that’s the purpose of a relationship isn’t it? Loving each other even through tough times”

Lissie sat up and assured you, with charles and carlos agreeing Lissie’s statement

Maybe you’ve already made up your mind, but you just needed extra assurance from your closest friends

“Okay that’s all for the sappy talk, we need to go now, they’re finding for us charles, drivers meeting happens in 5 minutes and we need to be there” Carlos said his greetings and pulled charles along with him not giving him a chance to give his goodbyes to Lissie and i

While waiting for Lissie to finish her interview session with the redbull drivers, you were just walking to a nearby bar to get a drink, because it sure as hell is a hot day, and a drink right now would sound so fucking good.

what makes it worse, is the choice of clothing you’re wearing, you’re really not a fan of revealing clothes but Lissie had decided to dress you up, as after the qualifying rounds, she had made plans for both of you to go to a nearby club with some other friends.

Normally you’d have a blazer or a thin jacket as a cover-up but you had forgotten to picked up ur blazer from charles drivers room and you can’t access it without him being beside you as you didn’t really had a pass.

“here” as soon as you spoke about your blazer, you were handed a black blazer by someone

“than- pierre..?” you were slightly confused because he weren’t supposed to be here knowing there’ll be a debrief anytime in 15 mins, but here he is sitting beside you.

“charles handed me your blazer and told me you’d b here, he kinda send me away to talk to you” he shrugged, while ordering a drink.

you just gave him a smile, because you weren’t sure if you should bring up the conversation about him and kika knowing it’ll tensed up both of you.

“kika and i had the talk, i know you’re really curious about that” his seat was turned to face you, and he did the same to you, rotating your seat.

“I’ll just let you know how it goes and how i truly feel, it’ll be your choice if you are willing to accept me back into your life. I know how hard it is for you and i’m not rushing you to give me an answer, y/n.”

“go on” you gave him a nod

“kika was the one that knocked some sense into me, she told me that she could still see that i still had my heart reserved for you. Honestly, I’ve never notice it. I apologised to her that even-though we were in a relationship my heart didn’t belong to her. I felt bad of course, because at first i truly liked her but the constant reminders of you were just so hard to shrugged it off. When u came to Miami Grand Prix, i didn’t expect you’ll be there because charles told me you were busy and you guys barely communicated. I kinda bribed him to get regular updates about you” pierre laughed

“what did u bribe him with..?” you were as confused as ever, if charles needed anything he would have just gotten it, because this man has got to be the richest one in your friendship.

“advice on his fashion sense” well this clicked so well because lately Charles have been asking fashion advices from you, online shopping regularly, even having packages shipped to you just in case fans found out about his home address

“from you? i’m amazed, pierre. I was the one who had to pick your clothes for our dates, i’m glad you’ve upgraded that wardrobe of yours”

we both had more conversations but i had a question that i was much more curious

“did she went home?” changing the topic

“no, she’s still here, her friends are here so she went with them instead. I have asked her to keep the paddock passes because i felt bad”

you nodded ur head, it’s great that she’s still here, i wouldn’t want things to be awkward especially after the elevator incident

“We’ll start slow, we’ll then see how it goes” you said softly, you were honestly scared of how this will go because if pierre had done this to you once, what is stopping him to do it twice?

“That’s fine to me, y/n. I’ll prove to you that im worthy of getting the second chance” he hugged you

The hug still felt awkward and tense because it’s been quite a while since Pierre and you shared a hug

“You’re not interviewing anyone? I’ll probably have to be back soon in 10 minutes? Wanna walk back together?”

you shook your head, signalling him that you did not have any interviews today but agreed on walking back to the paddock together

“Lissie’s in-charge today, i’m interviewing aston martin’s team, mclaren’s team and your team though tomorrow, before and after the race. Guess you’ll need to see my face again, hope you don’t get sick of me!”

both of you shared a laugh, “i would never get sick of your face” pierre mumbled softly, which led to you not hearing anything

when both of you reached your respective destination, you gave your goodbyes and proceed to assist Lissie and the team to pack things up

Lissie noticed your existence, “everything alright?”

you gave her a thumbs up and continued your task.

you were drunk.

Things escalated so quickly, it’s not even 3 hours in and you were drunk.

It wasn’t drunk drunk but DRUNK DRUNK.

What’s crazy is you were never a light weight, but for some reason the empty stomach really made you feel like a light weight, because here you are seated on your table while the others were on the dance floor

You’ve never noticed your driver friends walking in to the exact same club in the next booth, because whenever you are drinking, all thoughts are only on you

Other than being drunk, you’re stubborn, because here you are chugging 4 shots of vodka and walking straight to the dance floor

“What’s gotten her, isn’t she the strongest amongst us?” Amanda, Lissie’s friend shouted through the music

Lissie signaled her a love sign which made the whole group did an “OOH”.

“hey pretty girl, slow down on those shots, will you?” You felt someone slid their arms on your wrist but was too confused on who it was with the blurred vision you had

But you do recognise this accent and voice

“Chaaaaaarles, what ar you doooing here?” holding on to him for stability

“What you’re here for too, how much did she drank?” Charles asked Lissie

Lissie didn’t know if she should be lying to Charles with the alcohol intake you had or tell the truth, so she chose the latter option because charles was one scary man when he’s angry

“More than you can imagine”

Charles rolled his eyes and walked you back to the booth, except this wasn’t the girls booth but it’s the guys and they were shocked seeing you here drunk

Obviously not a common sight for them

“y/n?” pierre stood up walking to both you and charles

“hey hahahahaha, fuck i’m so light headed right now” head in your hands, whining which made the guys laughed

“not the strongest soldier anymore?” george snickered

“shut the fuck up, i think the dude did something to the drink it’s so fucking strong, it’s so insane” you leaned your head back not knowing it landed on Lance’s shoulder

“What did you ask for?” Carlos questioned you

“the stongest in the house and i did a lot a LOT of shots, fuck i have an interview too, with YOU” you gave carlos his answer and pointed to Lance signifying that you’re doing an interview with him tomorrow probably hangover.

“well that’s probably why you’re like this, sherlock holmes” Lando added on

“drink up” pierre handed you a glass of water, which you gulped down in a second

“easy” Lance soothed your back, and this action made Pierre tensed which charles happened to notice and can’t help but to smile

“thaaaanks sweet boy, other girls would die to be me right now” you laughed, half conscious half drunk

“drinking more?” george asked

you nodded your head while charles and pierre shouted a hard NO

“unfair, i’m doing great right now, i think…?” you gave them a pout which led them to laugh loudly

“you’re crazy y/n, just don’t turn up to the paddock with those huge shades of yours that you used to do back then” Lando commented which made you rolled your eyes

“They made me feel like a bad bitch, maybe you need a pair too so you’re able to feel the bad bitch vibes”

“I don’t like drunk y/n, she’s snarky as hell” pierre taken aback by the comment you gave to lando

“that’s on you babes, honesty is the best policy!!!!!!!! Oh deaaaaaaaaaar, i need to fucking puke, i’m never drinking” you stood up and dragged pierre along with you because right now, he’s just standing in front of you

“Lovebirds” carlos rolled his eyes, but deep down it kinda warmed the other guys because they knew both of you were each other end games

you wake up in a hotel bed, but you are unsure if you made it home safely, until you heard songs from the kitchen area.

now it clicked you, this isn’t your hotel room, hell nah, you refuse to believe you had just done a one night stand but when you got out of bed you’ve realise, you were clothed head to toe

an oversize black tee with basketball shorts that was clearly to long and big for your small size.

Oh my god, how drunk were you to be in a strangers bed

You walked slowly to the kitchen area only to recognise the guy’s back view and it slowly made your heart warm because you have never thought you’ll face this back view again

Pierre heard your footsteps, “awake? any hangovers?”

you shook, well this was the best part because no matter how much you drink, hangover weren’t really your thing

“feeling anything?” he stood in-front of you hands on your head which made your head lean on to his torso

pierre felt so full knowing you’re here in front of him, the view he has been dying to wake up to

“just hungry, how did i end up here?”

“charles a room away, but he’s sharing with Arthur and you’re quite noisy when you are drunk so i opted to bring you in my room instead.

We couldn’t find Lissie anywhere, apparently she went home at 6AM because she knocked charles door frantically thinking you were lost, she’s dead asleep though in your room. Must be a great night for both of you”

he chuckled playing with your hair

“great night, yes? for me and lissie? maybe. Did you cook? Something smells good, i don’t know if it’s you or the food”

“it’s the food, it might be me too, you’re the stinky one here” pierre guided you to the kitchen, seeing the pancakes and omelette placed right in-front of you

“i don’t mind having a taste of both but the pancakes are screaming out to me more, sorry pierre”

this was an out of pocket comment, because to Pierre you were someone shy but through out the night, he realised that you were getting super bold with everything

“this isn’t very friends of us, huh” you commented

“so why not let’s give it a try?” you added

pierre stood up in shocked and walked right over to kiss you there and that

“oh i fucking miss this, miss everything about you baby”

y/nviews just posted

tagged charles_leclerc , pierregasly and lissiemackintosh

liked by pierregasly, lissiemackintosh and others

y/nviews they droved off without me, I’m literally steve in the relationship

charles_leclerc YOU WERE WITH LISSIE

y/nviews could’ve offered?????????? smh and you call me your best friend? im offended

pierregasly there wasn’t any space, did u wanted to sit on my lap, dearest steve?

y/nviews that wasn’t a problem last night

georgerussell63 timeout stop ruining this child pierregasly y/nviews

gaslaaaayed wait…. R they back together??????? FINALLY?

tsunoday i’ve been waiting for this 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

pgaslighter landonorris they’re a quadrant right now, watch out they’re coming for your spot 🫵🏻

landonorris oh hell no lissiemackintosh GET OUT! That was my spot originally 🤗

pierregasly just posted

tagged y/nviews

liked by y/nviews, carlossainz55 and others

pierregasly she refused to get a license just so she’ll be my passenger princess forever, i’m loving it though

charles_leclerc she’s lying, she has one but don’t risk yourself

y/nviews this is false information, i’ve failed it at least 2 times

carlossainz55 i’ll teach you, i think im a great driver 🤭

pierregasly no one’s teaching my gf except me

y/nviews naw that shucks, i was srs about it though carlossainz55

lance_stroll was about to give a like until i saw your face, I’m taking it back y/nviews

y/nviews i love my fans 😓

y/nviews i love you forever my baguette 🥖

pierregasly …..

a/n: well that’s all for this series! i hope it’s a great ending bcause i was unsure on how i should’ve ended this :0

[ackermonie]

=requested, pt.2 of the lonely nights

another sleepless dawn breaks upon the horizon. you lay there, and even amongst the sweat and blood and dirt, your eyes watch the sky turn purple unblinkingly.

you’re done with your mission, the veil is down. you can go home now.

but isnt it peaceful?

the autumn breeze is gentle on your cheeks. you can still see the stars, and the moon, just like you, doesn’t seem to want to go home just yet. so you just lay there, basking in each other’s presence as you finally feel something akin to that you once felt in your youth.

its been years. seven? eight? all you know that its been long enough to forget his voice. his features started to fade away a little too, but when it gets so bad that you start to panic, you get out the old stash of grainy old pictures to reminisce on how his hair used to feel between your fingers, but you’ve long forgotten that too.

has he changed? did he cut his hair short or is he letting it fall to his back?

has the skin beside his eyes begin to wrinkle?

you dont cry about it anymore. you’ve already done your fair share of that. now all that remains is an empty, hollow place in your chest where he once occupied.

the purple of the sky turns into lilac, and your eyes begin to feel heavy. you can’t get up. you’re not severely injured or anything, a scratch here and a gash there, but the very will to get yourself on your feet remains lost, and you don’t even care. they’ll probably send someone to check the scene out soon, they can take you home then.

the weather is nice, its peacefully quiet, and you haven’t slept in over 48 hours. what can a little nap do? your eyes flutter closed.

“you got bold.”

in a split second, your dagger was aimed up to protect your face. your vision is a bit blurry when u snap your eyes open to see a sea of faded features exactly above you. only the dagger in your hand separates your faces.

you blink furiously, trying to get the impaired vision to set straight. the person above you is squatting behind your head, its a man for sure. his shoulders are so broad he almost blocks your whole vision, casting a shadow over you. he tilts his head as your eyes begun to scan his face, vision returning gradually.

your heart sinks.

the skin beside his eyes did start to wrinkle.

“suguru.” it comes out in a breath.

“what are you doing out here?”

“suguru?” your fingers loosen on the dagger for only a couple of seconds, your body just never used to having its defenses up in his presence, but this isn't the same person anymore. no longer the geto suguru you knew and loved. you need to remember this.

“i can’t think of a worse place to nap in, to be frank.”

your knuckles turn white around your dagger again.

“how did you find me?”

“you made quite a scene.”

he let his hair grow longer. way longer than you thought. some of it falls on his shoulder, and he’s keeping it up from his face in a bun like he used to. they say hair keeps memories. you sigh in relief.

despite everything, your hands are aching to reach for him. to cradle his face and brush through the silky strands, but you only keep a firm grasp on the sharp instrument between you two.

the sky is getting brighter. you don’t want the moon to leave you alone with him. the sun will only make him more real.

“are you just going to lay there?” he tilts his head again, gesturing at you. “don’t you have somewhere to report back to?”

“why are you here?”

“you see, i happen to sorta eat curses, and you just exorcized my dinner.”

“oh,” it comes out uncontrollably.

“impressive show to watch, to be honest.” you feel his hand on yours, it makes you flinch. he pushes your armed hand away from your faces with the littlest of forces, but your hand now rests beside your head, the dagger tumbled out of your grasp. “you’ve gotten stronger.”

“i was never weak.” it was intended to be a harsh snarl, but you feel choked. your voice barely held any venom in it.

geto smiles a bit. “i never thought you were.”

no, no. no.

you push him away with a hand to his chest that you wish lingered a bit more than it did, pulling yourself up in a sitting position with your back to him. it’s an open meadow, theres no where you can run and hide. you need to get out of here. his very scent is intoxicating you, pulling tears up from somewhere you thought you buried deep.

“leave me alone.” you throw over your shoulder. you catch a glimpse of him, he’s still squatting down, watching you intently. “i dont want you here.”

he stays quiet, you can only hear the sound of your own harsh breaths. your eyes blur, this time with tears, but you don’t think you can hold out for long.

what is he thinking, showing up like that? after all this time? did he think you’ll run into his arms like you once did? does he take pleasure from watching you like that, body shaken up with choked back tears, unable even to look him in the eye?

that’s it. you push yourself up despite the gash on the side of your thigh that pulls out a yelp out of you.

“i’m leaving, then.” you begin to limp away. the first tear betrays you.

suddenly, the ground in front of you is split by a line of shadows from which a curse materialized in front of you. a dragon, it’s tail wiggling with its teeth pulled back in a snarl. a certain curse that you were always practically fond of.

you stumble back. the eyes widened in shock fell back to familiarity, a gaze that still holds the pain of loss. somehow you still know that none of this is the way it used to be, no matter how familiar.

the curse draws closer. it’s not threatening, just forcing you back until you hit a solid figure behind you. you turn back abruptly, hands immediately in a position to push geto away, but he was always quicker than you were.

his hands were there to welcome your wrists instead, grip unyielding despite your trials to break away. he doesn’t look tense when you look up at him. doesn’t look threatened, nor angry, just…

sad. he looks sad.

“come on, baby,” his voice was so low, you’d thought it was a part of your imagination if you didn’t see his lips move. “don’t do this to me.”

don’t do this to me??? you want to scream at him. want to bang on his chest until it cracks open, but all you seem to be able to do is look up at him as tears flow freely down your face, and he looks so fucking sad.

he lets go of one wrist, hesitant for a second to see what your reaction will be. his hand traces up to your face, big fingers cradling your face with the world’s gentleness in them. the other hand softens around your wrist, slipping up until his thumb rests in the palm of your hand, then geto heaves out a sigh.

his eyes scan your face for a few seconds.

“you’re as beautiful as the day i lost you.”

you almost hear the sound of your heart shattering. your lips fall apart, you too scanning his face, except you’re doing it to find any sign of bluffing, anything that can mend whatever remains of your shattered heart, but all you find is sincerity.

“what are you doing?” disbelief is evident on your features.

his forehead falls to yours, and your fist unclenches on his chest. you can feel the heartbeat under his bones.

“i dont know,” he breathes out, he still smells the same. your noses touch. “i don’t know, but let us just have this.”

“sugu…” you sob. your hand traces up to rest on the side of his neck, almost scared to touch his hair.

“y/n…” his chest heaves, your lips brush as he whispers your name. “please.”

you barely manage a little nod, a broken sob escaping past your lips only to be swallowed by a pair of desperate ones that knock the very oxygen out of you.

his lips on yours are so familiar. you’ve done this hundreds of times, yet never enough. your hands, finally, slip through the silky strands, and you almost cry out because you remember it all all over again. the sleepless nights and the calls until dawn breaks, the silly braids you used to decorate his hair with, it all slams into you like a high-speed train.

but a strong grasp is holding you firmly, preventing your knees from giving out. he kisses you like a starved man, like he misses the very air you breath, like it’s been tearing him up inside not having you in his arms like this.

you let yourself believe that this is all true. that he’s been spending even more sleepless nights than you are. that no call of his name sounds as soothing as the way your tone sounds.

but its not gonna last long. you two begin to treat those few minutes like they are your last on earth. his hand slips under your uniform to touch as much skin as possible, and you cradle his face, planting the feeling of his hair between your fingers deep in your memories.

i love yous and im sorrys are muttered, but you’re not sure who says them. you pull back to look at him and he’s never looked this vulnerable. you hold yourself back from asking why and how could you, but you know you wont like the answer. geto suguru never regrets the choice he makes.

as much as his love for you and for his friends remains, his mind has been set on this path long ago.

“next lifetime,” you breathe shakily, holding his face to yours intimately. “let’s stay away from jujutsu altogether, hm?” you try to smile, swiping a thumb under his eye. “we’ll just run, okay? we’ll run and stay together.”

geto smiles, wiping your tear-stained cheek with a calloused thumb, but he says nothing.

"no, you have to promise me." your grip tightens on the material of his clothes, panic surging through your eyes. "you'll find me."

"I'll find you. I promise."

[asherloki]

heyy, i saw that ur requests were open, but that was like 2 weeks ago so idk if its still valid, but if they are; i was thinking abt this quote i saw on pinterest:

“you cant love someone unless you love yourself first. bullshit. i have never loved myself, but you, oh god, i loved you so much i forgot what hating myself feels like”

with sherlock who is COMPLETELY smitten with reader and views them as his safe space from insufferable people and unsolvable cases

if u consider this or even write this thank you in advance <3 (thank u anyways tho bc ur work is so good like?? bruh gimme some writing skills IM BEGGING)

anways, bye <3

"My sunshine"

Bbc Sherlock

A/n:- ohho it was lovely ! Even though I'm sorry for the writing quality, I've been busy and lacking creativity, hope you still like it.

"do you like it?" asked the detective while handing me a box packed nicely. He had a real busy day running around the city with Scotland yard officers, especially with lestrade, accompanied by John.

"what is it?" I enquired taking the box from him. I still remember the day we first met. The night was cold and I met his lovely landlady Mrs Hudson. She was friendly enough to invite me over tea at her place and my curiosity led me to meet her famous tenant. Mr Sherlock Holmes. The urge to share the flat with this junkie detective got on me for some reason. Everything about his flat fascinated where anyone would say his flat is unbearable. His cold lifeless flat, as he describes so, was somehow comforting to him. Then with his approval and with my family's permission as well, I moved in to Baker Street as his flatmate. 221b was closer to my office so it was an advantage in convincing my family to let me shift to Baker Street. Since then I've seen two sides of Sherlock. One, the side everyone knows, the analytical cold detective. And two, the side which is revealed to very few people, luckily for me being one of them. Living so close to him taught me he has a soft side. The one that's like a goofy child. The one who sits infront me while I paint just staring at the painting to be done with fascination in his eyes. The one that takes a brush from my set that I'm not using at that moment and starts to draw patterns on a crumbled paper, one of those which contained a case which was still unsolved and bugged him.

"open it, I just hope you like it." replied he, With, what I believe to be a bit nervousness in his voice, yet also a bit of excitement. So I giggled at his childishness and opened the box. To my delight it was a chocolate muffin. A big one, loaded with chocolate chips.

"oh gosh my favourite muffin!" I could barely hold my excitement to me. Turning to him I saw a wide smile spreading accross his lips what was alot like a relief.

"yes, it's yours, I hope it tastes good too" said the man who was perhaps more than ten years older than me, not perhaps, he was alot older than me. But it never felt so, he was still a goofy kid somehow.

"ofcourse it'll be, where's yours?" he must've bought for himself as well I presumed. And a lovely evening with tea and our muffins was on my mind, oh not to forget, the exciting stories he is yet to tell.

"m-mine?" he stuttered, as if him having bought a muffin for himself was out of question.

"yes yours, don't tell me you bought a tasty big muffin for me and not for yourself, how could you resist?" seriously, how could he resist the urge to get his hands on such a precious thing.

"I.." he trailed off, as if he was confused, "didn't think about getting one for me actually".

These are the kind of replies that makes me wanna wrap him in my arms. This man never thought anything good for himself, never got anything good for himself. But I couldn't just have it on my own. The box contained the store name and address, which is far away, perhaps somewhere near his case led him to. So going there and buying another was out of question, but this muffin was big enough, and sharing is always an option.

"you know what?" I spoke, regaining some enthusiasm, "how about some tea?"

"that sounds wonderful" that's it, that's the reply I wanted to hear before going to the kitchen. I took out our cups and Mrs Hudson was always there to bring us a kettle filled with tea.

Sherlock took his chair and sat while I sat on one beside his. I placed our cups while he poured the tea.

"we forgot the biscuits, I'll get them give me minute." he was getting up from his chair when I interrupted.

"no need" looking at him I saw his baffled expressions again. Honestly Sherlock, enough baffling for one day. "sit down, I have something better".

He sat yet he was utterly confused, Even more not less when he saw me taking out the muffin and cutting it into half. Smart detective knew the other half belongs to him, or I want so.

"here, have something better than regular biscuits" saying so with a smile I passed the plate with his part of the muffin closer to him.

"but... that.." he stuttered again, "that was for you" after a pause he finally formed the sentence.

"yes, which means I can do anything I want with it."

He kept on looking at me and with a soft nod took a piece in his spoon. Then slowly he took the piece in. I could see his expression changing again while he munched that piece of muffin, into something that indicated if he were someone else he could've shaded a drop of tear or two.

"hey" I said pating his shoulder and keeping my palm on it, "what happened?"

He raised his face so his eyes were staring into mine, but there was barely any intensity in his eyes at that moment. there was, what I presume is sadness. He finally inhaled a deep breath before speaking up,

"I have..." he paused, he was collecting words I was sure of it, "I've never considered myself as someone who deserves anything good."

His word, about himself, it's devastating he thinks so little about himself.

"what are you talking about?" baffled, I was puzzled way too much to figure out what was going inside him, imagine a man like him is unable to see anything good in him. "Sherlock, please, you literally save hundreds of lives".

"I have also shot one"

"to save john, your best friend".

He looked around as if trying to find more proof against him.

"Sherlock?" I called him softly, as he turned his face to me I got up from my chair and to his utter surprise, embraced him, rather his head, leaning it on my chest. His body turned stiff, apparently he didn't expect a hug.

"you're the best and the most wisest man people have ever seen, and the kindest and the most innocent person I've ever had the opportunity to know".

His stiffness lessened with these words and finally he let himself fall into my arms, fall into my embrace, unknowingly I also leaned on him. My cheek touching his curls. His rather soft curls.

"you're saying this?" he asked with such joy and surprise in his voice.

"yes ofcourse, why not". I waited for a reply, it took him time but finally he said,

"because you've always been the sunshine for me. Since the day you've entered in my life, since I've got to know you. my work was all I knew but for some reason I longed to come home at night to you. I always saw you as someone whom I don't deserve, who's too good for me, too young for me. So I just enjoyed every second we are together, fir one day you may choose someone to love and move out. I tried to do every little thing that could bring you happiness. I was so lost, with you I found my way. But I won't demand anything from you, because I believe someone young, handsome a better person should be with you".

I couldn't believe, but I had to, it was all real, his words, his feelings, him.

"you never said you think of me so highly" I whispered.

"that's why I was broken everytime I saw you with a guy, but I was way more broken when I saw you shedding tears for them leaving you, how could someone like you be someone's second choice when to me you're not just the first or only choice but my whole being knows you're the right choice, a bit too right I was afraid to ever consider myself as your lover, I didn't dare to think of anyone else since I laid my eyes on you, I never chose anyone, no matter how smart, attractive or lovely they were, because now I see, I was supposed to choose you, I got so utterly devoted to you that I don't remember myself anymore. I only know you."

"Sherlock " I whispered his name while slowly letting his head go, I sat in my chair and wondered how beautiful his feelings are that neither his nor my eyes could hold a drop of tear from falling down. "now it's my turn then, I've barely been ever treated this well as you've confessed yourself, I've barely been completely understood. do you think, this immature, little less intelligent, day dreamer flatmate of yours is worthy of you?"

I knew it'd be enough to overwhelm him if he really thought so highly of me and it did. He didn't stop his tears this time, he immediately embraced me and we both cried silently while embracing eachother until his warm voice was heard saying, "then I guess we are actually worthy of eachother ".

I giggled, yes we are. absolutely yes.

"yes, I'll keep you happy ".

"and I'll treat you well."

Tag list :- @astudyinlaura @selcouthangel @a-victorian-girl @callsign-sunshine

If anyone wants to be in my taglist then let me know!

[somanyfandomsblog]

Ok my full episode 6 commentary 🤣

“Toss it, Seaweed Brain” oh so Annabeth you want me dead?

“When did you turn into an old married couple?” Luke clocking Percabeth, speak on it Luke!

“You were like two seconds ahead of me…” yes ok once again giving the married couple energy thank u!!

WISE GIRL WISE GIRL WISE GIRL😭🤧🥹 PEOPLE LITERALLY DIED

Percy opening up to Annabeth about his dreams🤧

“There are things I don’t know” — Percy is like … well if you don’t know we’re fucked. Lmaoooo. I can’t I love my son🤣

Percabeth yet again giving married couple energy while talking to Hermes … yeah! And let’s speak on it!!!

“Do you know what that feels like? To be so close to someone you love, knowing neither of you has any choice but to keep hurting each other?” — obvs Hermes was talking about how Percy feels about Sally but damn foreshadowing with Percabeth too for reals 😳

Ok pitpocket Annie!!!! 👏🏻

“Who’s Grover?” PERCY THAT HURT !!!

Percabeth giving mom and dad energy to Grover when they found him I am dead lmao

“Are we late because of me?” 🤧 it’s ok pookie bear you didn’t know!!!!

Hermes note … ok so maybe he’s trying to help… slay…?

“I killed a Minotaur on my first try, right? How hard could this be?” Oh no… baby that’s not…

No bc why would Annabeth let Percy drive though fr cmon now😭😭

When Percy thought he was home free and looked over at Annabeth and then scratched the whole ass right side I was sobbing lmao😭

When Grover remembered them🥹 ah my precious babies

“We weren’t alone. It’s easy to forget what’s important when you’re alone” so true Annie so let’s stop splitting up for my own mental health ok!!!

Ok I’m not gonna lie the whole underwater scene threw me off bc what do you mean the solstice passed and they’re “released from the quest” this is bonkers ? And 4 pearls right off the bat…. Interesting!!!!! I’m hooked!!!

Overall I really enjoyed the episode and I like the changes they made, they keep it fresh and interesting as a book reader but still true to the story! (And I loved Lin as Hermes lol he killed it!!!)

I can’t wait for next weeks episode!!!!! Ahh

[picmitsuba]

pls pls pls tell me more about Ayuka and/or Kiku I literally love them and their designs so much!!!!!

OHHH GOSH.. see i fumble at these all the time. i have a story for them in my head but idk how to put it out there... and in an order that makes sense?

ill try for kikus since i have it the most sorted rn

kikus actual name is emika, the girl shes possessing is just named kiku. !! but we call her kiku anyways. kind of symbolic Shrug

she has ties to the name Kiku from back when she was alive... ! her friend was named the same thing, but she hasnt realized that lol. this is why she possesses This kiku in the first place, she felt very drawn to her due to her popularity and her name.

emika was alive during the timeline of the sumire chapters! her and her friend, kiku (this is confusing to write) were both young children when they both saw no.6 just kill everyone. emika after this day is able to tell when people will die. super cool!

the trauma just really settles in very late when kiku (the friend) is a teenager. she becomes wary of everyone, esp adult figures and essentially secludes herself from the village. but emika can see that kiku will die soon. but...! she doesnt realize she has the same timed fate as her friend :D

they finally talk, and meet at the pond they would visit as kids. one thing leads to another, and emika is pushed into the pond and left to drown :-D

as a spirit, she comes back angry and restless. she didnt remember a thing, but she felt like the life she had amounted to nothing. so it doesnt.. end like that. she begins possessing people. she switches bodies every 1-2 years!

her super moral rule of possession is to only possess people who are close to death... (very supernatural way of thinking lol) but in this case, kiku (present) was going to have a long life. but emika possesses her anyways cuz shes selfish 🙏. which just cuts the real kikus life short, as her actual spirit just did not even last a week outside of the body.

in her head, she reasons it by planning to make this life Really worth it. but... issue is, possessed humans arent really sensed. very much forgetable. so no one ever approaches or notices her. so she stays as kiku... for decades! since the 80s!! just waiting for someone to see her. even the few who Can notice her due to a higher spiritual power just kind of dgaf and dont realise what she even is lol

she cant let go of humanity despite being dead.. she died young and she cant even remember her own past, so she clings onto humanity through possession instead of moving on! otherwise, she will think her life will amount to nothing. very healthy!

but ayuka can now see her after being cursed, and kiku makes her first friend. and nothing bad will happen!.

theres 'kiku' for ya 🫡 u kinda get the theming for her character, yah :D

[my-castles-crumbling]

HIYA CAS ❤️ It’s wolfstar anon!!!!!! Remember me? Guess what? ME AND CLARA ARE DATING NOW! 

So turns out she’s had a massive crush on me for ages. Which, you know, seems obvious in hindsight. 

So imma just tell u what’s happened and then like- the adivce I need. Cool? 

SO BASICALLY I’ve been tryna keep outta my house over the summer cause my parents work from home and it’s not civilised, so I usually go out and chill with my mates. 

SO like two weeks ago (we’ve hung out a lot these are just the important ones okay?) I text Clara and ask if it’s cool for me to drop by cause it’s like 9am and she’s usually still asleep, but she texts back that she’s awake cause she’s got these awful period cramps (being a person with a uterus can fucking suck right?) so I go to her place, it’s past town so I pick up some of those like heat up pad thingys that stick to you cause she likes tho and said they were out and obviously snacks and then, because she’s in pain and i’m a sucker, watch Taylor Swift videos and the Era Tour with her (AGAIN). 

Nothing against Taylor just not my vibe. Also i’ve watched it with Clara SO MANY TIMES cause she loves it that I know like every song. 

Anyway, we’re sat in her room watching it and I realise that i’m being a fucking idiot. I always forget to consider romance just cause- idk it doesn’t occur to me 😭 BUT Clara is amazing and also, I need to chill. She’s my friend most of all, I should just TALK to her. 

ANYWAYS so last week I got my head out my arse and told her about what i’d been thinking about, and she admitted she DOES LIKE ME, and has for a while. 

Sometimes I feel like i’m not being as genuine as other people you know? Like, Clara has fancied me for a while and I didn’t even notice? And I don’t really know how I feel. I just find romance and stuff like that so hard, because it’s never been THAT important to me. 

But now it is because it’s Clara.

I didn’t ask her out until like three days ago. After we talked last week, I told her that her admitting she likes me won’t fuck with our friendship, but that I have like no idea how i’m feeling so i’d get back to her, but in the meantime she can vibe and know that we’re cool.

And I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Like how am I supposed to know if I fancy her or not? Sure I do things for her I wouldn’t do for other people, because I care more, but maybe i’m just a dick to other people? I DONT KNOW CASSSSS. 

Look so like three days ago I decided to ask her out so that I could know. 

And we had an amazing date and it felt like nothing i’ve felt before but I felt guilty at the end cause it was like I was using her.  So I admitted I had no clue how I was feeling, and that I never get crushes on people first cause I never feel like that until I start feeling like that and I think maybe I always had a crush on her and mixed it up with friendship and how i’m a mess she should probably stay away from.

And then she told me she knows i’m a mess because she asked me out last year and we went on a whole date and she kissed my cheek and then I DIDNT REALISE IT FUCKING A DATE 😭

So… yeah. You’re now updated :)

Long story short, we’re dating and i’m hopefully not a dick ❤️

Also how the fuck do you know the difference between friendship and- not? Like, more? I feel like no one’s taught me EMOTIONS correctly 😭

Wow I am SOOOOOO SHOCKED :P

But for real as far as our question, this is a difficult one. Personally, I see more than friendship as someone who I care deeply about but also who I want deep intimacy with. Someone who I want in my future, but someone who I also crave closeness with in all ways. But some people don’t like certain types of intimacy for whatever reason and still feel romantic feelings, so people see romance differently depending on who it is.

I think honestly, you should give it a shot. If it starts to feel wrong, communicate that. Say you love her but just as a friend! Just keep the lines of communication open and be honest, that’s the best thing you can do 🥰

[iturmom]

[id: a pack of naruto trading cards. the graphic on the pack shows (from left to right) naruto, boruto, and sasuke, with boruto in front and between naruto and sasuke. sasuke’s hand is on naruto’s right shoulder, and naruto’s left hand is on sasuke’s waist, pressing sasuke’s body to naruto’s. naruto’s right hand is on boruto’s head. naruto and sasuke are looking at boruto, naruto with a silly smile and sasuke with an affectionate, soft smile. boruto is looking up at sasuke with one eye, the other is closed, and he also has a large toothy grin, like naruto /end id]

hi i have brain worms. i have a disease and it is most definitely fatal and i got it from this picture. 

i saw another picture, (some naruto family photo but i cannot for the life of me remember which family it was) the other day and i compared it to this picture immediately upon seeing it and i still had this picture open in a tab so when i looked at it i went sleuthing on the internet to see if i could find the picture i compared it to and no luck BUT i did find. 

literally. sasuke has never looked so happy and comfortable in an official picture with his OWN family. THERE IS NOT EVEN AN IMAGE WHERE SASUKE IS TOUCHING HIS “WIFE” (except for when he poked her forehead which as we have established is NOT a loving gesture and if u think it is, ask your doctor if xanax is right for you) NEVER EVEN FUCKING MIND THEM SHARING SUCH A TENDER AND AFFECTIONATE EMBRACE, FORGET IT. 

in my short research i found a gif of sasuke and sakura on a training field with sarada and sasuke is like holding sarada or something it’s kinda hard to tell. he’s looking at her with a happy expression and it’s precious. and then SAKURA LEANS IN TO HUG HER AND SASUKE BACKS AWAY!?!?!?!?!? 

like. if u really loved ur wife u were in a happy loving marriage with a love child and it’s just a super fucking loving functional family, you would not back away when your wife hugs your child. a real family man would see that as the optimal opportunity for a nice loving family hug and everyone would smile and be so happy and. that’s not what happened. 

HE DOES NOT TOUCH HIS “WIFE.” 

BUT HE IS SO COMFORTABLE CASUALLY TOUCHING NARUTO. IN CANON.

IN THE UCHIHA FAMILY PHOTO HE IS NOT EVEN ACKNOWLEDGING EITHER OF THEM LET ALONE TOUCHING THEM.

but in THIS ONE PHOTO. ON A PACK OF FUCKING CARDS. we see more love then we EVER see between sasuke and his own family. 

i mean just look at them. they’re holding each other. holding each other closer than sasuke has ever held his wife, with more affection than he has ever shown his wife IN TOTAL. and they’re so comfortable. not only is sasuke acknowledging them both but AFFECTIONATELY. (AND HOW FUCKING SAD IS IT THAT THIS MINIMAL AMOUNT OF TENDERNESS IS MORE THAN HE HAS EVER SHOWN FOR HIS FAMILY)

also i just want to say. if u put this into a real world perspective right. imagine with me if you will. two guys who are childhood best friends. they grew up and settled down with wives and had some kids right. imagine them doing this YOU CAN’T BECAUSE TWO STRAIGHT GUYS WITH WIVES AND KIDS WOULD NEVER DO THIS. they would never hold each other like this and dote over one of the guy’s kids it wouldn’t happen. and u can correct me if i’m wrong like maybe you know some guys like that maybe i’m just not at the age yet where i can speak from experience i don’t have any friends with wives and families u know what i mean? i could be wrong. but i can’t picture two straight guys in love with their wives doing this i just can’t. this is a perfect example of a loving family taking a family photo I HAVE EYES. if u showed this to someone who’s never even heard of a nuh-root-oh before they would be like ‘oh look at these two married men with their son diversity win love is love’ or some shit. I’M RIGHT.

now prove me wrong and show me an officially licensed image where sasuke looks like he loves his family as much as this and touches his “wife” with as much affection and i will eat my words i swear on my ass

[slytherinshua]

He's just precious. I definitely need to watch some of his live performances! I love it when artists really get into the music. Yechan is quite fun to watch, he seems to get quite into it. And Wonsang!! I love it when he is making faces while playing bass (generally I'm reacting the same way to his parts ahaha)

People are honestly so tough to deal with sometimes lol. I'd become a recluse if I could ahaha. I was talking about this with my brother once, when I finally have enough money to move out (not anytime soon 😭) I NEED to live with someone else. Partly for safety, but also because if I don't I'll become a hermit and never leave ahaha (also because I despise cooking and there is a very real possibility that I'll just starve instead lol). I'm glad you enjoy talking to me, I do too! (Feel free to message me anytime too!)

That's exciting, I hope it goes well!! Are you working towards grades or anything? Or do you just go along with music that you want to learn? Lessons on zoom seems interesting, online classes were hard enough sometimes so music lessons must have been something else. It is literally so hard to find motivation to practice! Like I want to be better, but I don't want to practice ahaha. Although I use to really have to practice because my mum taught me for a while so she'd definitely know if I didn't 😭

Oh wow you were so close to them!! I'd probably forget to how to pose as well, although I can't really pose in general without it being awkward lol. That's really cute that he was telling you what he was going to do

i remember my favourite hyunsang song (or maybe favourite song of all time in general) is snowflake and i watched the live of it and there's this one part where he looks back at his band/orchestra behind him and just smiles so widely before he goes up onto the lifted platform to do his guitar solo AND IDK IT MADE ME EMO CAUSE I NEVER SEE THAT BIG SMILE FROM HIM HES SO CUTE (here if u wanna see it btw)

yechan is always so mesmerizing to watch he gets SO into the music and playing you just can't take your eyes off of him!! wonsang always has fun with it and dances, smiles so wide, or focuses really hard when hes doing hard parts on the bass i just love him i could talk about him all day

yeah and its pretty bad i don't have like any interaction irl its all online and im kinda thankful for that because its a lot easier to deal with interactions online than in person its a lot less stressful 😭😭 but i never go outside i swear 😭😭 i feel like i would get so lonely if i was living alone even though i don't tend to think of myself as someone who needs in person social interaction... but i think it would build up and hit hard if i no longer had people around me to talk to even a little every day like my family.... hehe i will its so fun to talk to you ^^

rn i do plan to take another music exam probably grade 6 since that'll be the easiest to do. i need it for a high school credit so we'll see how it goes. i've done grade 3 and grade 5 in the past and got first class honors both times i think but it's still extremely stressful i think i cried both times lmao 😭😭 technically im more grade 8 or 9 piano but i don't want to do a higher level when i don't need to and haven't been playing for a year so we'll see how grade 6 stuff goes.... online lessons for piano were interesting for sure 😭😭 it was harder to do stuff like ear training and having the teacher not like exactly there with you made it harder to progress... i also forgot abt my piano lesson times a lot and would oversleep 💀 i really lost motivation to practice around the same time i was getting burned out because of school idk... back in 2020 i was so motivated with piano i would practice so much and that's actually why after i finished my grade 5 exam i progressed like 3 levels right after. i remember getting the grade 6-7 books but all the pieces were so easy in them all of sudden just cause of how much i practiced lol. but now i think i'm gonna struggle a bit to pick things back up before it gets easy again. damn having your mom as your teacher must've been hard but also nice in a way i assume?? i remember my mom used to bribe me with stuff to get me to practice, and one time i wanted to quit and she would not let me which was good cause i would've regretted it so hard but at the time i was not happy that i couldn't quit 😭😭

i remembered a pose for the second pic we took but for the first one my mind was just so blank, party cause i didn't know we were gonna do group photo immediately and also cause sangyeop was RIGHT there talking to ME. like he literally told me to sit i prob would've been fine if he hadn't spoken but like he did so ITS HIS FAULT FR 😭 i wanted to follow the pose he said he was gonna do and i did for the second pic since he said a heart pose but like damn my brain didn't want to understand what a flower pose was....

[auspex]

1 on 1 mark session recap! As always, sorry not a lot of context is given.

Mark first finished reading a book 'on thorns and their consequences' which was basically explaining how the sabbat came to be and their PoV on things and then with an anarch commentary towards the end expressing their disagreements. but on the first last page was red runic lettering which mark could not recognize and which sucked up his vitae when he placed it on it.

He tried to do some internet research and came across an obscure forum which claims to be for learning about obscure languages but actually seems to have a lot of vampires on it posting real and fake runes, kinda like testing each other

The runes mark was looking at were on there but the mod, who basically posts in every server, says 'you wont find anything about that in this life.' the posteris like 'cmon doesn't someone have any family who could help' and the mod replies 'ask J' so that smenacing.

idk if J is Julius? it probably isnt but anyway. mark has already reported reading this book to julius and so is gonna ask him about it cause he couldn't figure it out.

the rest of the night he spends teaching G -G is doing well and did remember his vowels : ) also explained to Gs sister how he made sure the investigation would stop and ask if she needed any other help. she asked if he could get them free or at least out of their current essentially prison sooner and mark said no but they would be out in a month to a month and a half. she didn't know how long that was. so he explained how torpor and weeks and  months and years worked

she still didnt say thanks or bye to mark but there was maybe something where she was close to doing so

i love G im so glad he is doing well he learned a lot he is almost through the alphabet

ok now for the meat of the session. the next night he goes to the chantry to talk to cassidy about the books. Knocks on the door. no answer. 

He is getting a bad feeling. represented irl by the ST playing absolutely terrifying music as i search for him.

In the chantry apartments there is an often ignored ghoul at the front and so then he asked her where Lilian’s apartment was (Cassidy’s best friend.). She told him. He knocked on her door. No answer. 

Checks the cafeteria. nope. library. nope. physics department (where their circle head, Dr. White, is). Nope. He asks someone there if she had seen either of them. nope.

so i'm worried as hell

im trying to think what mark could do and im like. i cant scry on him cause i dont have anything of Cassidy’s. 

and the st gives me a Look as if 2 say u do ur forgetting

But he kinda gives it to me for free hes like, ur wearing the same coat you did when you went to the movies

Turns out mark has cassidy's ticket. so thats close enough to being his so. mark does scry on him

its not super juicy but it is super concerning. Cassidy is by lilian in what is probably the side door in his haven that mark hasn’t been in. barricading the door. with a fuckton of furniture. and also pushing against it. lilian looks terrified. cassidy looks So Done With This Shit (tm). something is banging on the door.

so with that mark goes back to the ghoul and is like. So. Uhm. Yeah i actually have permission to enter cassidys haven yes. please let me in

she looks scared - mark put her in a real bad spot. If he doesn’t actually have permission and she lets him in he could get in trouble. but he reassures her that itis fine and his decision and nothing bad will happen. 

so she says ok and goes to open the door (she is able to if she is doing so of her own consent, she functions as a key ig). As she goes to open it, Mark says uhm. they are doing experiments so when you open the door. back up. and she's like "okay?' and opens the door and immediately vine tentacle thingies burst out and she falls back on her ass and scrambles back, screaming

she gets away and mark engages in combat. its the same sort of monster, just smaller, as the one on his territory in the conservatory, that navigate by sound. it has a lion's mane around a beak in the center and vine like tentacles around it.

mark takes a LOT of damage in its first attack he had like 1 unharmed box left  but he manages to win :) 

cassidy and lilian pop out from the door and are like. mark is that you?

Cassidy’s haven is wreckt sadly. Mark's like. yeah its me. its dead. you can come out.

lilian is SO sad it's dead but she isnt mad at mark. its clear she wanted to subdue it but they had no way to do so and mark comments as such

she's like "i was sooo close " :(

cassidy looks So Done and is like. thank you for your assistance mark but how did you . get in.

mark is like. thats not really important right now, is it? cassidy says 'somewhat, but we can discuss that later'

mark says that unfortunately this made quite a lot of noise and the ghoul went screaming for help so time to get your stories straight.

theres a few other things said but then zach rolls up

If you dont know who zach is he is a newly turned tremere. dr. white's child. elevated into power due to his sire. he's a classic skater  boy. hes head of security. he figured ALL of marks shit out when he broke into a lab - he is GOOD at his job despite his casual attitude. he says 'chill' all the time.

he skates up (yes skateboard in the hall) and asks whats up. mark says 'hi zach. it's chill, i handled it.' (Mark kinda likes Zach). 

And hes like. 'whats chill? can you explain?' and marks like. looks at cassidy and lilian. 'they would know better i just came at the end' and cassidy’s like. looks at lilian as if to say to her. u did this shit u explain!

so lilian starts a story which is kind of obviously partially a lie.

she says that she was doing her research, developing off of Leanah's (which was the stuff mark uhm. stole and sabotaged for her). and she noticed this evening that some things were off. papers where she wouldn't normally leave them. but the chimera project was So Important (TM) for the chantry that she just HAD to press on. Oh Also I found this Lipstick (produces lipstick) that looks JUST like what Leeanah wears isnt that interesting! (zach has her put it in an evidence back for him). She says 'Cassidy even made a joke that maybe I should wear makeup more often." Cassidy grunts but keeps a poker face. he would obviously Never Fucking Say That and lilian is messing with him.

god i love them sm. mark also knows cassidy would never fucking make that joke

(explaining a story that may dictate ur fate as u are investigated. does not miss an opportunity to fuck w the bestie* girl!

she continues to say that she got the embryo (described as tadpole) out of the cauldron she starts growing it. and it kept well. growing.

she pauses there. zach is like. okay and? it grows and?

Cassidy steps in. 'when it got bigger than our couch we realized we had a problem.' (also hehe ‘our’ couch their friendship is everything 2 me…) 

lilians like yes. then thankfully cassidy, with some assistance from mark, killed it. and here we are :) and then zach turns to mark and is like. what do you mean how did you get here how did you know.

and marks like Oh Well You Know "I was coming here for unrelated reasons, cassidy and myself are working together you see. And I had permission to enter. And obviously I would assist him in combat. *Coughs.*

he coughs cause i rolled 1 success on the lie T_T

zach is like. you have permission?? and cassidys like uh yes. 'as needed he can enter. its easier that way' so yay that ghoul won't get in trouble LOLLL mark got retroactive permission

even if each can tell he lied like. how do u call him on that when the person who was to have given him that permission said he did.

Liliana finishes up by describing how awful it was to be sabotage. At the end of her story. she says "Im sure leeanah would be very sorry if she saw the destruction she caused and would say so' and cassidy said 'i would not accept her apology' annnddd thiswent over my head but the st explained that was lilian apologizing to cassidy and cassidy telling her to fuck offlkdsafjlkdsjf

and zachs like. aight seems chill! (Perhaps all was not chill). lemme go in your haven here to see evidence of that sabotage

and  cassidys like oh, please do let me clean up first :) and zachs like :) noo you should see my room haha its fine :) and then cassidsy like. okay fine. you do not have permission to enter my haven. which is something respected in the chantry

zachs like do u really wanna go down that route.

Cassidy appears to hesitate. Mark is FREAKINGGG out he CANNOOTTTT find those books mark had him gather. thankfully cassidy says. Yes. Yes I do.

And so zach says fine thats chill. ill see you soon- and he has one of his guys (he had a small posse with him) stay. cassidys like. well that was a mess. mark says yes. which is why you  should start cleaning it. do you want help.

The person Zach left behind enters cassidys room and was making sure the pc was ok. mark is like cassidy is that ok?? and cassidy says 'oh, hes chill.' It seems this was the little fucker that set up the pc and internet for cassidy in the first place! cassidy makes friends with fledglings :) he doesn't speak but cassidy calls him Hack. because that's what he does, ig

Anyway. Mark helps lilian gather monster body parts to the center of the room where she starts some sort of chanting incantation to get rid of it. cassidy goes into his Side Room to start cleaning. When mark is done gathering body parts he knocks and peeks into the side hallway. cassidy tells him to enter and mark starts helping him put books away

well first theres this hallway which has 2 doors. mark enters door two with cassidy.

its a beautiful study room with mostly books, but also some old clothes, including a duster (COWBOY CASSIDY REAL...) and a painting with someone in a cuirass but the face is oddly blurry

also, all the books do not have legible titles.

with sense the unseen it seems the chandelier in the room has some sort of enchantment blurring those things out

there is also a TALL ASS stack of those notebooks he writes in. Mark glances at it and looks at cassidy who pauses and says. i need to call in a favor. can you just keep packing books away for 10 mins ? and marks like Sure

and hes left alone in cassidys study. but he decides to NOT snoop and figures he wouldnt be able to read shit anwyay due to that enchantment so he does literally just put books away.

Cassidy returns and unfolds a piece of paper that he remembers Wendy using before - its like. a bag of holding.

he unfolds it and puts it under the stack of notebooks carefully . the note books fall in. then he carefully, very very very carefully, folds it up. mark comments 'got a few years in there, huh?" he replies "A good deal more than that.".

but yeah theres also furniture and stuff everywhere btw, its a mess. The pack up books. During this time mark asked like. ok we cant keep these books about resisting blood bonds in her haven. and Cassidy is like. really mark. you're gonna make me haul them from the library every time ur gonna read them, and mark is like. sorry. yeah : )

They finish and return to the mainroom. lilian is on the floor, hands splayed, miserable. done with everything. cassidy makes a point to step over her.

cassidy and mark hauled books up to lillian's haven which was much smaller. and complained about stairs. together <3 lol

When they return hack is no where to be found. cassidy looks around and comments that the should not be in the back rooms. he does open the door to the second room but he asks mark to step back so he cant see in : (anyway mark ends up finding zach with sense the unseen (he went Invisible ig) and he was rifling upstairs through lillian's things

cassidy is like 'hack ive been through enough tonight please just give it back' and hack goes to the computer and types:

";)

I have to give them something, y''no"

and cassidy is like. sigh. will this make our unlives harder in the future. and he writes

"maybe a little"

and marks says “you know what that's fair” <- has done the same shit of finding something Smaller so it proves he was Trying but actually not

cassidy comments that he is sad about his clothes getting thrown around and wrecked - 'over the decades he had collected quite a collection, some of which are hard if not impossible to replace' and mark comments 'i hope the tv is ok too'

and upon saying that cassidy actually reacts as opposed to being stone faced "Oh no you're right, the tv!" and he goes right for it

drops to his knees to prop it back up. and theres a crack through a fourth of it. he looks so sad. mark turns it on and it does still display but there is that crack

mark is like its ok we can get another and cassidy is like ' but this was my first tv :('. hes sentimental about it my fucking HEART

marks like. im sorry. i can help you pick out a new one maybe. cassidy says he'll likely take mark up on that. and mark also says maybe it could be fixed and cassidy says he will also try that

but yeah its cute that he got attached to the tv T_T (edited)

anyway zach skates right back in after the bit with hack that i described above. and says. ok in the name of the authority invested in me by blah blah blah... everyone but you, get out please! (hack being that one)

sooo the three leave. And mark is like.well. good luck with everything.

Cassidy and lilian do not look very happy but give ike a half hearted thanks

mark is lowkey like. ok u could be a bit more thankful i saved ur ass and helped u clean up but OKAy . . . .

cassidy also mentions that they can still work on their shared research in a few nights

oh also mark finally got the opportunity to ask if they had showers and they do not and mark is like. wow that sucks.

Cassidy diddnt seem to care but like. dude. imagine only having washrooms. L.

thats the session!

[viatrix-glow]

I HAVE FINALLY FINISHED MY RENDERS/LAYOUTS/WHATEVER FOR MY ENSTARS OC….. and now i will dump a bunch of information about her 🤲🏽

here’s some outfits for her!! tbh the winter one was made on the spot soooo idk if it’ll actually stay

here’s the faux scout cards <3 they took way too long to make and yes i stole the bg of the second one from mika’s card (the first is also from the game). i’m not drawing a background

heres some more info about her. no organization im just gonna spout some rapid fire facts. keep in mind she is a little bit (a lot bit) of a self indulgent oc <3

-she is what i am dubbing a fill-in idol. essentially, she’s an idol who fills in for other units when they’re missing a member for a performance . this is why she works with valkyrie most often (she can take the roll of shu or nazuna for ex songs)

-her first name comes from a song (hikari by royal scandal). no real reason i just like the song lol

-she left switch on very good terms (she’s still besties with all 3 of them). she just left because she thought the unit functioned better as a trio (“you three shine brighter on stage without me~”) she still performs with them from time to time though (usually for smaller audiences, or she just joins them for practice)

-she’s been friends with mika since before they entered yumenosaki (they applied together), and became close to arashi in her first year too. she had planned on trying out for valk alongside him, but got caught up with switch

-speaking of switch! she runs into tsumugi on the day that he first visits the library (with the key rei gives him to get into the secret area) and recognizes him as one of the fine members . she goes with him to the library and meets natsume there (same scene as canon just. she’s there .) she gets along really well with him (and with mugi), which is why she ends up as a member of switch during her second year.

-she used to have a crush on nazuna (product of watching the performances and going to mika’s practices) . not really relevant i just wanted to throw it out there. does she have a crush on someone now? i don’t know

-her last name (yuuta) is intentionally the same as my twst oc, aurelia . they are sisters (aurelia is the older one by a year and a few months -(her bday is 2/2)). my thought is that when aurelia is sent to the world of twst, somehow the people who know her in her or world forget about her, so hikari doesn’t remember her as of now .

-she works part time at the same diner/restaurant/whatever as niki. he has to teach her a Lot about cooking though (she’s getting better)

-she absolutely Hates hates hatesssss rinne and crazy:b when they first start to cause trouble. she’s very protective over her friends and the other idols at es. even though she dislikes eichi for everything he did, she recognizes and appreciates the work he’s put into making es. she doesn’t like how crazy:b throws themselves into others live shows (live shows are so important and personal to units!!), and she gets very snappy and upset with them for it. however, she does her best to keep the peace when she’s around them because they’re under the same agency. after the main story stuff in !! finished though she begins to understand the position rinne +the bees were in, and she starts to forgive them and grow somewhat close to them. i would put them in the frenemies area

-i think her shuffle unit would be flambé!…? i tried to make it branco since they only have 4 members, but since she works with sora so often i think that disqualifies her. i really would like her to be in blend+ but again. same problem

-i think she’s close with anzu too. girlies gotta stick together! her, anzu and naru can go out for girls nights together

-the only unit she doesn’t really fill in for is 2wink because . the whole twin dynamic. kinda hard to replace one . and mam/doubleface obv

ok i’m running out of thoughts it’s 12am but that’s my oc!!!! if u read all of this thank you i love u <3

[cosmos-dot-semicolon]

Reblogging just for the line 'woah real sex things are happening in front of my eyeballs that's crazy'. That's fantastic XD

It's really cool to hear about your opinions as someone else on a different spot on the spectrum! Ever since I've found more ace and aro friends IRL, it's been really neat to find out just how varied everyone's experiences are :O also to know that you were 20 when you figured it out is comforting but erm

I know I said I'm pretty well adjusted to romantic relationships being a real thing people want now, but I can still kinda relate to your initial reactions to romance? I remember being told that making out was a thing people did in the school library, and it was like 'okay but what. why'. Plus that time my cousin revealed she had a boyfriend on call and I was like 'wait but I just assumed people like me. don't do that. hmm'. And the idea that one of my younger uncles went through with marriage during my life at all.

I suppose my situation doesn't put me in touch with relatives much so I missed most of the events of people getting into romantic relationships and such. I assumed that wasn't a thing that ran in my family, because they were like me, and I didn't care about any of that. When it came to school, it was a much more distant thing, and hence I adjusted to it more easily there.

Like you said, it's not really a judgement on them. But for me it's like finding out everyone else has an extra sense, but for something really irrelevant to me like. idk. which baseball team is more likely to win the next match or whatever.

"The what-play episode of what??" searches it up... You know I'm not sure that explanation helped at all. I always forget what normal people's taste in television is like. Somebody was paid to make that??? You watched it with coworkers 20 years older than you?? You're a braver soul than I am

I think I'm a bit more favourable to romance plots due to being a little more grey. I'm not sure they're something I'd want to have myself, but I think I can empathise a little bit if it fit the characters, and the writer pulls things off well enough. Which is unfortunately a big 'if'.

...like. Good god, the amount of patience you have to have for some of the bullshit people put in romance plots. stab stab stab is correct. In recent memory, the only romance plot I've vaguely liked was the love-triangle turned polyamory in Iron Widow. It lingers just long enough for you to wonder if the writer is gonna drag it out, and then just u-turns into something way more fun instead. Even if it's not the best handled, it's pretty clever, and pretty neat rep for a YA book.

Most of my annoyance about couples in media honestly comes more from shipping than media directly. I suspect this is because I tend to keep myself away from stuff that involves romance at all? But I think you're definitely right in that sometimes an intimate friendship would be more fitting, and romantic love is not the end-all be all. It's something that needs to be more normalised, and it would be great to see more media cover the sort of thing I have with some of my close friends.

also YES power couple villains. always fantastic. and long-time married couples are great. you always have such good taste ^∇^

can i request. 1, 2, 4, 8, 16. for the aro ask thing. a lot of questions but I like me some powers of 2.

Words cannot describe how much I love that you just picked all of the powers of 2.

1. Where are you on the aro-spectrum?

Full on 100% aromantic. Not a drop of romance in me 😎

2. When did you first realise you were aro-spec?

I think it was late 2021/early 2022 at the ripe old age of 20 years old. Pretty good timing on my part, since Alice Oseman was on the cusp of getting big, and JaidenAnimations was just about to post her aro ace video.

4. What moments make you think, “Well, I’m definitely aro”

Sometimes if I think about certain aspects romance to hard, I get kind of...like...dizzy? It's like my brain just can't process romance at a certain level if I look at it too deeply. Specifically when people do romantic gestures.

Like when I saw caught a glance of a couple full on making out in middle school on my way out the door (I actually remember telling my dad about this on the car ride home in a state of semi-shock. He didn't seem to think this event was as noteworthy as I did), or when my brother holds his girlfriend's hand, or when my other brother was getting married and at one point wrote an itinerary on our whiteboard labelled "[Other Brother]'s Wedding".

My brain just can't grasp the idea that real people...actually...viscerally desire to do that. That it's so...natural to them...like an instinct.

It's not like I'm jealous or (necessarily) repulsed by the idea, I just simply cannot comprehend feeling or thinking that way. The concept is so...alien to me.

I strongly believe that alloromantic people do not feel this way ever.

8. What other identities are you, if any?

Asexual ♠️

That one's less significant to me, but also pretty neat. Was also a lot easier to figure out.

16. How do you feel about sex scenes/romantic plots/subplots in movies?

Sex scenes: When I was a teenager, they had kind of a "woah real sex things are happening in front of my eyeballs that's crazy" appeal, but now that I'm older they've lost the novelty and it's more like "Okay, I guess this is happening now :/".

Unless you're with other people when they happen. In that case they're HILARIOUS. The most cursed bonding experience ever. I wouldn't purposely seek it out, but there's nothing quite like watching the pony-play episode of Bones with 4 or 5 of your coworkers, all of whom are at least two decades older than you 👍.

Romance plots: There has to be some kind of connection for me to really get it, and even then it's more of a "this seems to make these characters happy, I'm glad for them". I don't really get any extra enjoyment from a romantic relationship that I wouldn't get from a platonic one.

On some level though, I'm usually thinking "this could've been a friendship".

I do get a bit excited about gay relationships becoming canon (go representation, woo!), but if I stop and think about it, I don't really get a lot out of the relationship itself, it's mostly just joy from seeing representation.

And I do enjoy seeing characters care about each other, and I'm happy for the audience that enjoys watching couples do couple stuff, but sometimes the romantic aspect gives me that kind of dissonance I mentioned in question 4.

That being said, I do think the attitude of "you can only love someone this much or show your affection for them in this particular way if there's romantic feeling involved" messed with my head a bit more than I realized, and I've kind of been mad about it recently.

If the romance plot has any kind of stupidity or stalling going on, I get irate very quickly. Especially stalling. If you want to do a romance plot, fine good for you, but like ACTUALLY DO IT!

Making the characters almost confess but then they get interrupted and go back to pining for another twelve seasons? Stab! Stab! Stab! You've been hinting these two are are destined by the writers to get together the whole series, but then suddenly one or both of them enters a romantic relationship with another character you know isn't going to last? Literally a bottom 10 least favourite trope, I always feel so bad for that 3rd party. Jail forever.

You know what kind of romance always hits good though? Power couple villains. I love how they're always boosting each other.

Long-time happily married couples are usually pretty good too. I think it helps that they're a bit chiller. And less prone to breaking into explosive maybe-toxic fights for drama.

In summary, I think it's fine, but I really crave more depictions of intimate non-romantic relationships.