#reese you rule and your writing rules and you are so so funny

[ceilingfan5]

real quick compliment someone you admire in the tags for extra tickets to spend at the prize counter

[booksbydlwhite]

Leave the Thrillers, Take the Romance: A Mid-January Update

Hey friends! Welcome to episode 107 of The Bookcast. I'm recording today with a bit of a cold, so I sound funny, but I'm here and that's all that matters.  I  had to come in and share a mid-month update on my latest reads, writing efforts and author wins with you. Also, it snowed in Atlanta, a thing that only happens every few years, so there's that.   

Book Report

I have read 14 of 100 books. I'm well ahead of my challenge and as per usual, I'll re-evaluate mid year. SO FAR it looks like I am going to be bumping up the goal much earlier. I just love reading. Here's what I've read so far this month- note I was on vacation for the first six days of the month.  I'm trying something new by tracking on both Goodreads and StoryGraph. I don't personally enjoy storygraph but I want to stick it out to see if I get good reporting at the end of the year. Goodreads is very social but not good at reporting. 

Track Her Down by Melinda Leigh (Bree Taggart #10)

A Winter Crest Christmas Reloaded: Mia and Zen by Cordae

One More to Die by Joy Ellis (Audible Original)

Tell Her Story by Margo Hunt (Audible Original)

The Family Lies by Angela Henry

The Setup by Falguni Kothari

Lacey James series by Chris Patchell

Shooting the Moon by Brenda Novak

Westmoreland Legacy series bundle by Brenda Jackson: 

The Rancher Returns

His Secret Son

An Honorable Seduction

The Secret Witness by Victor Methos

More Than Friends by Reese Ryan (Love and Music Suite #3)

Writing Updates:

Currently working on a Valentine's Day story titled Rules in Romance

Calculated Risk is with my editor and due end of February

Missing Persons is complete but needs editing

Still plugging away at my Berkeley Sisters trilogy

Writing fan fiction on my Substack (short fiction by dlwhite.substack.com)

I ended the episode asking how you all are planning to get through these interesting times ahead. Drop me a line - I'd love to hear from you!

Support the show

Support this show with a recurring gift at bookcast.buzzsprout.com. Follow my substack at authordlwhite.substack.com Buy books by DL White at https://payhip.com/booksbydlwhite Buy Merch by DLWhite at my spreadshop. Find the Bookcast on booksbydlwhite.com/bookcast or your fave podcast app: Apple Podcasts | Spotify |Overcast | Podlink| Youtube

TRANSCRIPT

DL White [00:00:14]:

Hello. Good morning. Good afternoon. Good evening. Happy Sunday or whatever day or time of day you might be listening to this podcast. Welcome back to the book cast. I am so glad you are here, boos and bros, book pals, fans of the written word. I'm a little bit loopy.

DL White [00:00:34]:

I know you can hear it in my voice. I got a lot of nasally things going on. I do have a cold. I think I am on the end of it, but I am very coffee, sneezy, sniffly, and I have not taken any cold meds because I'm weird. So I think after I record, I may actually take cold meds. So, anyhow, welcome back to the book cast. I am DL White, your host. I am an Atlanta based author of 15 published novels, 16 written ones that you'll hear about calculated risk later this year.

DL White [00:01:14]:

Actually, I think it's more than 16 because I have also finished missing persons. I don't know. I've lost count now is where I'm at. I know I'm not at 20 yet. Anyway, novels, short stories, fan fiction, I write them. I also read. I'm a reader first. So we begin with the book report as always, and then we talk about writing and topics of the day.

DL White [00:01:40]:

I no longer plan out this podcast, so that's why I'm rambling. And perhaps I should go back to planning out the podcast, but, honestly, I feel like it goes so much better when I'm just I get up. I look at the my my, book report information, my Goodreads challenge mainly, figure out where I'm at for the month so I can report, look at my sales to see, like, do I have anything to talk about? Yes? No? Maybe? Is it exciting, or is it meh? Look at my writing stats. How's that going? And, and then I I press record. And I was using Riverside, and I still have my my I still have, like, a login there, but it's just like an extra step. Like, all I need is Audacity. I just open Audacity, and I start recording. So I feel like it's going a little bit better, actually.

DL White [00:02:36]:

I don't have to script out every word I need to say. So, you know, we're gonna do what works until it doesn't work anymore. Anyway, I don't think this episode is going to be long, but who knows? Because I didn't script it out. So it could be 40 minutes of me yammering about books. Who knows? Anyhow, so let's get rolling. We're gonna have a little coffee break. And And then after the jump, we're gonna talk about books and writing. Today is Sunday, January 12th.

DL White [00:03:07]:

It is 8:11 AM. There is snow on the ground here in Atlanta, which I'm very surprised about. I actually figured it would be gone, like, by tomorrow, but it is cold outside. I took some garbage out this morning, and, it's it's it's chilly. Hopefully, we get above 40 degrees today and this stuff starts melting because Monday Friday are work from home days for us. But if this stuff is still on the ground on Tuesday, I ain't going nowhere. Nowhere. Anyhow, let's have some coffee and then come back to talk about books.

DL White [00:04:22]:

Okay. And we are back. Let us begin with the book report. Let me get to my tab because I didn't write any of this down because I'm smart. We are 12 days into the year, and I haven't done an update since January 1. So we are just gonna call this, like, for the year at, 14 books completed. I am 11 books ahead of schedule. My goal is, of course, set at 100 books as always.

DL White [00:04:55]:

I always set it at a 100 on January 1, and we see where we are by, you know, midyear, like the end of June, I'll evaluate. Maybe I will raise it to 150, 175. Last year, I ended up with 225 books. I had a lot that I needed to hide from, and, that worked out really well for me, actually. This year, I'm doing a little something different. I'm trying trying to duplicate my books on the StoryGraph because I wanna see, like, all the pretty graphs and whatever. There's a lot that goes into, tracking a book on StoryGraph, and I literally I just wanna track the book and the dates that I read them. I don't I don't wanna fill out all this extra information, so I'm really not doing all that.

DL White [00:05:51]:

So I don't know how pretty my charts are gonna look, but Goodreads doesn't do very good reporting to me. And I like numbers, and I like reports and graphs and pie charts and bar charts. So I am not actually a big fan of the story graph. It's too plain for me. Like, it it simultaneously does too much and not enough and, that I don't like the interface. I can't see what all my friends are reading. It's not very social. Goodreads is, like, very social.

DL White [00:06:24]:

I can see what everybody else is reading, what everybody else is reviewing, what everybody else is, you know, adding what, you know, what, what do they call them? What, shelves everybody's adding their books to? Like, Goodreads is very social to me, and I've been saying this for a long time. I'm not giving up anything that makes my life easier and enjoyable. I do not care what Jeff Bezos is doing. I don't. He owns 8% of Amazon. 8. If I'm not participating in Amazon stuff, like me not sending him 14 99 a month for Prime isn't going to make him less of a billionaire. So I'm not making my life harder to stand arm and arm with people who can't even get in the booth with me.

DL White [00:07:10]:

I don't I don't care. So that's my stance on it. I'm at Goodreads. I enjoy Goodreads. I'm duplicating at the story graph so I can participate in a couple of challenges that are hosted there and also just so I can see, you know, what my reading year is gonna look like graph wise. So I'm at 14 books for the year. A lot of that is audio, I'm pretty sure, and let's just take a look at, what I have been reading this year. Melinda Lee, track her down.

DL White [00:07:47]:

This is number 10 in the Bree Taggart series. Bree Taggart is a, like, of course, a female sheriff out in the northwest. I believe it's the, Oregon area. I love this series, and I've been gobbling them down. I need Melinda Lee and Kendra Elliott to write many, many books much faster. And then I, caught up a little bit on some holiday reading, A Winter Crest Christmas Reloaded, Mia and Zen by an author named Cordae. This was, I think this was like a, like, a urban urban romance is what they call it. It's one of those, like, you can tell by the cover, by the font, and how they're it's all, like, shiny and whatever.

DL White [00:08:34]:

One of those, there was a lot of sex in it, so there's that, if that's something that interests you. It's a thing that doesn't really interest me much anymore. Like, I like reading sex in a novel as much as the next guy, but after, like, the first two scenes, I get it. They like each other. I'm I'm good. Like, I I like that it's there. Like, if I wanna go back and read a sex scene, I know where to find it. But, I don't read books for the sex, so I wanna know how like, does the plot sizzle as much as those bedroom scenes sizzle? And sometimes, the plot don't be sizzling the plot don't be sizzling.

DL White [00:09:17]:

So, like, a lot of times when I I write, I write the story to make sure the story has legs, and I already know, like, this scene is gonna lead to sex. That scene's gonna be, like, suggestive, but I can close the door that one. But I already know which scenes are gonna have sex in them, but I leave that out. And then in draft 2 is when I go through front to back. I'm writing, I'm rewriting, I'm fluffing, I'm adding, and every time I go through that book, I am adding more to each scene so that it's full and it's fleshed out. That's how I do it and, like, you know, I know I am not one of them popular girls out here, but I feel like my books like, they work out it works out good for me. I wanna make sure that the the story is about the story and the sex is an added benefit. That's an obvious part of a modern adult relationship.

DL White [00:10:23]:

Anyway, I picked up 2 Audible originals, 1 More TO Die by Joy Ellis and Tell Her Story by Margo Hunt. I honestly don't remember what these books were about. They were short, like, 2 hours and whatever. I read those on the second or listened to those on the second. And then The Family Lies by Angela Henry, I believe publishes January 14th. So this coming up, so I had this as an arc. Like, this was really good until it was not. Angela Henry is a new to me author.

DL White [00:10:59]:

I think I started following her on TikTok around, like, 2023, and she had, it's not her first book, but the first book I know by her called The Perfect Ties or something like that. And that book was pretty good, but she gets to a point in her book where it kinda jumps off a cliff, and then it just becomes entirely too complicated, and I can't follow the story. This story, it was it was actually it was actually pretty good about a woman that gets a job managing, the, personal library of this very wealthy family. And there's just, like, a bunch of, like, not creepy, but, like, weird stuff that's happening in the house. Like, she has to live in the house. The dude that, owns the house and is, like, the patriarch of the family, I guess, that hires her. He's got, like, some weird stuff going on. It was, like, it was really good, and then, like, the last 4th of the book was just a lot of what? Wait.

DL White [00:12:07]:

What? What? So I think I gave it 3 stars. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't, like, the most amazing book I've I've ever read. The Family Lies by Angela Henry. And then I listened to The Setup by Falguni Kothari. This was pretty good. This was like it was an audible original about I believe they are a Daisy family and grandpa, I believe, or an uncle, I couldn't I I can't remember, is trying to set a young woman up with, a man so she can get married. And at first, they don't like each other, and then they start to grow on each other. It was really cute, and it was, you know, it's an audible original, so it was pretty short.

DL White [00:12:58]:

Then I stumbled upon this series, and I ate it all the way up. The Lacey James series by Chris Patchell. Lacey James is a I believe she's a young, investigator, detective. And, I found the first one, which I think is, find her, and it's been, I don't know, 10 days since I read this book, so I don't remember the exact, the, you know, the synopsis of the book. It's a police procedural, which is my absolute catnip. I ran through all 4 of the books in this series, in 2 days, which I'm want to do. Hello, Robert Dugoni, Kendra Elliott, Melinda Lee. I'm all over it.

DL White [00:13:52]:

So this series is really good. I really, really enjoyed it. All of these books, I believe, are available on Everand. If you are a member, I think they're also at Chirp if you wanna just buy them outright. I think I borrowed them not borrowed, but think I got them at Libro. I don't remember. Or maybe it was Everand. I don't know.

DL White [00:14:13]:

Can't remember. But Chris Patchell, really good series, and I think there is another coming out in that series in a few weeks, so I'm excited about that. And then I grabbed Brenda Novak shooting the moon from NetGalley. This is an audible, audio arc, and I take all the audio arcs I can get because I wanna keep getting more. This is a audio release of an old Brenda Novak book, and it showed it did not age well. It was rather uninteresting, but, it was a story about a guy who comes back to his hometown to claim the son that he, quote, unquote, left behind. The mother of his child died in a car accident, I believe, and his, mother's the the mother's the child's aunt has been raising him, and grandparents have, like, been taking over since the child's mother died. Like, way way back when they were dating, he was quote, unquote bad news from the other side of the tracks, and dad paid him to go away.

DL White [00:15:34]:

And he comes back like, hey. I need access to my son. And yeah. It's I mean oh, gosh. Yeah. White author's romance doesn't hit me at all anymore. It just doesn't it just doesn't do anything for me. But I listened to it.

DL White [00:15:56]:

I got all the way through it. Gotta send my review off to NetGalley, and we're done with that. And that's that's just gonna be the last that we're gonna do of that. And then I got Brenda Jackson released the first three books in the Westmoreland legacy series, The Rancher Returns, His Secret Son, and An Honorable Seduction in 1 bundle. So this was like a long listen. This took me, like, a couple days to get through. I put this on Blue Sky. Whenever I think that I have put too much sex in a book, I am just going to refer to Brenda Jackson romance because I promise you once her characters start having sex, it's sex in every chapter.

DL White [00:16:48]:

But the thing that miss Jackson does is that story is tight. There is a beginning and there is a climax and there is an end. That story is tight. The sex isn't like, the book the this the story isn't the sex. The story is the story and the sex enhances. There just is a lot of it. So I just sometimes, like, I I'm reading and I'm like, again? Oh my goodness. Whoo.

DL White [00:17:17]:

Lord. So I'm to the point where I kinda skip through a lot of that, and I just I just wanna know what happens in the story. Thankfully, there's so much pleasure in reading the story itself. So those 3 I got through. I can't say I will ever listen to 3 audiobooks in one bundle at a time ever again, but Brenda Jackson is not a bad way to spend a couple of days. And then had a couple days off from reading because that was a lot that was a lot of reading in 9 days. And then yesterday, I, picked up on well, actually, Friday, I picked up, The Secret Witness by Victor Methos because I was want I wanted to read book 2 then realized I hadn't read book 1, which was the secret witness, so I picked that up. It wasn't the best book I ever read.

DL White [00:18:11]:

I like Victor Methos, and I see why I started this and then stopped reading it because it was a little bit boring. But I did wanna read book 1 before I read book 2, so now I'm gonna pick up book 2. I don't even remember what the name of book 2 is, but I got that out of the way. So I can pick up book 2 now. So I got that, and then I read yesterday. I I have been so deep in thriller, suspense, mystery since January 1. I needed some romance. I woke up yesterday like I need a romance immediately.

DL White [00:18:44]:

And Rhys Ryan just released book 3 in the Love and Music Suite series. I believe this is her 1st self published series, and she's doing such an amazing job with it. I'm like I am so pleased and proud of this work that Ries Ryan has been doing. More than Friends is this, friends to lovers romance. And it's a second chance because they dated in high school and decided that they would rather be friends, except one of them did not really want to stay friends. And hence, like, that's how friends to lovers always is, which kinda ticks me off. Like, one of them is always, like like, hanging out in the cut, hoping the situation will change. Meanwhile, I will just take your friendship as a consolation prize.

DL White [00:19:32]:

It's never that they're, like, actual, like, friends. And then one day, they look at each other and they're like, hey. So, why haven't we ever like, that's the Friends to Lovers I wanna read. That's a Friends to Lovers I would write. So I got that read yesterday. It was excellent. Excellent. Like, when I am reading and talking back to the book and highlighting things, it's a good, good read.

DL White [00:20:01]:

I really, really enjoyed it. It's fun. It's set in Atlanta, which I like, a lot, and, I just really enjoyed it. It's very good. More Than Friends, A Second Chance, Friends To Love is Romance by Rhys Ryan. Like, I love a Rhys Ryan book. She is like a Sunday afternoon snuggle down with a book kind of author for me. I have several of those, like, Synthia Williams, Delaney Diamond, Sharon c Cooper, Nia Forester.

DL White [00:20:27]:

Like, if I have a Sunday afternoon and I need to fill it with a book, I will dig through their catalog for something I haven't read. Turn on, like, the fire channel on YouTube, or lately, I've been listening to, like, this lo fi channel and grab me a snack, a beverage, and I'm out. I am out, and that is the best day for me. So that was the 14 books I've read so far in January. I am, of course, not done reading because come on. But it's been a good look so far. I've been I've been happy with my reading. So moving on super quickly to books.

DL White [00:21:07]:

Sales have dropped considerably since the holidays. Of course, things really slow down when the kids go back to school and the earth catches on fire and or freezes. There's been a lot going on, so sales have been a little slow. I'm not promoting as much. There's not there's not a whole lot going on, but it'll pick up hopefully toward, like, the second half of the month. My books are in a book funnel promo. It's an indie sales promo, which is gonna move a lot slower, I think, than a, like, a giveaway, but this is definitely, geared toward supporting indie author sales. So that's at BookFunnel.

DL White [00:21:49]:

I'll be talking about that in my newsletter this week. Also, in my newsletter, I will be talking about, I think I told you guys I wrote a newsletter magnet, like a little a short little story that you can only get in my newsletter. You can now also get it if you are a paid subscriber to my short fiction substack at short fiction dot substack short fiction by dlwhite.substack.com. That's also loaded up there. If you are a paid subscriber, you have automatic access to that as well as my weekly serial. Same time next week, which is actually almost done. I have maybe 4 chapters, which is, like, 2 days worth of posting. That's almost almost done.

DL White [00:22:33]:

So if you were waiting to subscribe until same time next week was already all loaded up, you might as well go and subscribe now. It's $5 a month. Short fiction by dlwhite.substack.com. Get into it, same time next week is a serial. It's a interracial I should actually say it's, yeah, it's a interracial rock star romance that I wrote. It was fan fiction, and then it was original fiction, and I unpublished it because it's interracial. And I'd be writing black on black Negro nosed romance. So, I brought it back as a serial because, it's already written, and I have been publishing it twice a week in theory on my short fiction substack.

DL White [00:23:17]:

It is, paid access only. I do have some free stuff on there. I also have a fan fiction story that I started writing. I actually started writing it in August and kinda lost the plot and stopped updating. And then I got a email from a reader that said they had started it and wondered if I was going to finish it. And I was like, what? So I went back to the archive. I was like, oh, yeah. I did start this, and then I started getting ideas.

DL White [00:23:46]:

And so I have been updating that, and so that's really fun. And that one is that is a fun one about a woman named Zoe Chapman. She is an aspiring songwriter, and, she gets a chance to attend a songwriter's retreat with, JC Chasez. And this is a thing that he does, except I think he usually does it in Nashville. The story is called Music on My Heart because it was the only song title I could think of, which is weird. I'm trying to bring it up so I can, so I can read the synopsis. When aspiring songwriter Zoe Chapman joins JC Chasez's exclusive mountain retreat, she's looking for a musical mentorship, not to fall for the man behind the legend. But as the late night studio sessions blur the lines between professional and personal, they discover their hearts might be writing a very different song.

DL White [00:24:44]:

So, I started writing this in August, and I picked it up in December. It's just like some fun fan fiction stuff if you have any interest in in single whatsoever. I, almost exclusively write JC. He's just a very interesting character to me, especially JC in his forties as opposed to JC in his teens and twenties. It's been very fun to watch him grow as an artist, as a writer, as a person. And so writing this older, more mature mentor type person who still is susceptible to meeting someone amazing that they should probably avoid but can't. I like it a lot. So that's going on my short fiction substack.

DL White [00:25:36]:

Fan fiction is always free, and I have a couple I do have some fan fiction stories that are written there. And, I also I have the serial that's there. I believe I have one serial that's free there on the short fiction substack. That is the story of Kate, which I really, really, really loved writing. And, like, writing that really helped me write missing persons because I needed to kinda turn I just needed to turn my brain toward something that isn't so, like, lovey dovey soft place to landy. So there's the story of Kate that's up there. I really enjoyed writing. The photograph is, up there.

DL White [00:26:17]:

That's a 4 part series that I wrote for the podcast last year. Really enjoyed writing that, and all of those really helped push me toward writing missing persons, which is done, but I do need to go through, like, edits and rewrites and fluffing and adding and verify things I just made up because it sounded good. So very exciting things going on on the substack, but I was talking about book sales. So I'm at 5446 for the year. Sales are spread across basically Amazon and Draft2Digital, then I have 21/21 sales through book funnel, which is direct sales. So 21 sales through my, channels. But a lot of those were free, copies of The Guy Next Door. I was giving that away in audio.

DL White [00:27:08]:

For some reason, I can't remember. So most of those are giveaways. The sales through Amazon and Draft2Digital are, sales that have actual royalties attached to them. Biggest sellers this month are Leslie's Curl and Die in audio, The Guy Next Door, an ebook Home for the Holidays, like, 11 I sold 11 copies of Home for the Holidays in January, which is darn good. A thin line dinner at Sam's, and then I have a couple of sales of pearl at Black Diamond Bay and Elysium Black Diamond Vacation Romance. Those are both part of the Black Diamond series. And then a couple of straggler orders for a second time around, the guy next door and the WANSA brunch. That's kind of how my sales are.

DL White [00:28:00]:

And then, like, a couple sales, I guess, for hay lovers. So that's kinda how my sales are breaking down for the month. Not too bad. I mean, not great, but, like, not too bad so far. I am it's before 15th. So, like, if I hit if I hit $50 before 15th, it bodes well for the rest of the month. So I'm at 54.46. I'm just honestly, I just try to make a $100 a month.

DL White [00:28:29]:

That covers a lot of the subscriptions that I'm paying for, although I subsidize a lot of that with my own money. And then I have a I have, like, my Substack subscriptions and my BuzzFeed subscriptions that helps also pay some costs. But a lot of the costs of being an author and running a podcast, I am paying for out of pocket. And so what what I'm getting in royalties and subscriptions is actually reimbursing me for stuff I've already paid for. That's neither here nor there. You know what I'm saying? Get out of my pocket. So that's what's going on with book sales. Writing wise, it's been kinda slow.

DL White [00:29:15]:

I have been trying to write this Valentine's Day piece for a minute, and it's kinda not coming together. And I'm a little upset about it. Like, I I keep keep keeping changing the title because I can't even decide what the title should be, but I I don't know. We'll see we'll see how it goes. It just is not it's not really coming together. It's kind of a jumbled mess. I'm on, like, chapter 3, and I just keep going back to chapters 1 and 2 and fixing things because if it doesn't start right, then I I set off again on the wrong foot. It's currently called Rules in Romance.

DL White [00:29:53]:

It is kind of an opposites attract grumpy sunshine kind of thing. It's set in Atlanta in the tech space, which I really enjoy writing because I just like writing smart people. And, my characters happen to meet in the cafe at the co working space where they both work at. Sterling has just relocated to Atlanta from New York, and Simone lives in Atlanta. And she works for a tech company, and it's her job to, put together this hiring platform that her company is, putting together, and they're gonna premiere it at this big gala. And, Simone is very much an introvert. Probably not as bad as Esme in the Neverlist, but as an introvert, I do find myself writing introverts because I know them very well. So it's like like, I I want to write it.

DL White [00:30:45]:

I want it to come together, but I also want it to be short. And it just in my mind, it just keeps I feel like when I write short, I leave so much out, but I also don't want to write a 75,000 word novel. You know? I just want this to be like a cute short that's gonna be out for Valentine's Day. I'm gonna take a look at it later. We'll see how it shakes out. I might just need to give it some time and, you know, hit it really hard, toward the end of January. I don't really have time. I don't have time.

DL White [00:31:19]:

I don't I don't have time really to get it to my editor. I needed to be reading writing this in November in order for her to have it in January, but here's where we are. So I don't know what I'm gonna do about that. I know she listens to the podcast. This is not any pressure. This is not, an editor Kai problem. This is a d l white problem. So I may not get it written in time.

DL White [00:31:46]:

It may be something I write and shoot out, and, y'all just have fun with all the typos in it. I'll I would never do that, maybe. I don't know. I I just wanna be I I wanna write more. I wanna publish more, and I just wanna be less rigid about how it has to come out. You know? Like, it doesn't have to be perfect. It doesn't have to be edited to the nth degree. And editing is editing is not terribly expensive because I have a very good editor who is cognizant of how much indie authors have to put their own money into their writing.

DL White [00:32:25]:

This is not absolutely not sucking up to my editor. We have had this conversation. But, also, I wanna reserve those funds for my full length projects that desperately need an extra eye. So these things where it's gonna be 5 or 8 chapters, you know, and I'm gonna sell it for 99¢. I'm not gonna spend on editing it. I'm just I'm I'm just not. And, you know, sue me, but I'm just not. So that's kinda where that is.

DL White [00:32:58]:

It's currently called rules and romance. Maybe I'll switch the maybe I'll switch the order and it could be romance and rules, but I don't like that. The idea is that it's kind of an opposite to attract kinda thing, and so I wanna I wanna play on the two sides of this equation. Like, you know, it's a it's a very grumpy sunshine kind of thing. So I may change the name again. I I don't know. So there's there's there's that. The other thing I'm writing is the fan fiction story, and I just published chapter 7 on Friday.

DL White [00:33:35]:

I don't know that I have another chapter in me this weekend. I wanna think about what the next chapter entails. It's a little bit of a field trip, and I just need to I need to think about it and put it together. So I'm probably gonna think about that this week and probably write it Thursday and post it Friday. That's used to be my old, fan fiction publishing schedule. I usually write on the weekends, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, then I edit, think about what I'm gonna write post. So that way, readers always have a week to, like, read it, react to it, you know, offer comments and feedback, etcetera. Meanwhile, I'm thinking about and writing the next chapter.

DL White [00:34:21]:

And I kind of have adapted that also to writing my books and my commercial fiction. So there's that. What else do I have going on? Let me open up Dabble here and see what's popping. I do have, the Berkeley sisters, which is the sisters trilogy I've been yammering about for, like, 2 years now. Missing persons, which I still need to get into. Calculated risk is in here. That's with the editor. I have to turn that in at the end of February.

DL White [00:34:49]:

Again, that's part of a group project. Still I arise, I haven't touched. I did add, like I don't know. I tried to do some editing on it, and I, like, I feel like I added, like, half a chapter to that in the last year, but it's still on the docket. And, I also was trying to do an epilogue to the never list, and I can't even tell you the title because that would be a spoiler. But, I wanna dig back into that and see if I could just do a fun little 5 chapter update to that story because I just love Esme and Trey, and I have the perfect little update to that couple. I just gotta I just have to get it out of my brain. You know? So that's what's happening over here.

DL White [00:35:36]:

Ain't nothing going on with the rent is what my mama would say. Yeah. That's what's happening here at Books by DL White. I am reading a lot. I am writing a lot. I am you know, I'm just trying to make it. I'm just trying to make it over here. I feel like I'm doing better than I was in November December, but I am kind of dreading the back half of January.

DL White [00:36:02]:

I just know I'm gonna be digging hard into reading, into writing, working, getting the work done. I'm somewhat unmotivated. It could have a lot to do with this cold, but also, like, that vacation was long, and it was really, really needed, and I hated to come back. Even though I really like my job, I hated to come back and, like, dig back into work and meetings and scheduling things, and the emails were flying. I definitely just eased eased real slow, nice and slow back into the year. So it is Sunday. I have coffee. I went through my, my planner and all of my streaming channels, and I wrote down all of the things that I have saved in my watch later cues and wrote them all down.

DL White [00:36:56]:

So I have lists on lists on lists of things I can be watching besides the news, things I can be looking at besides doomscrolling on all the social media sites, things I can be reading, writing, or watching for this next however long. That's how I'm gonna be making it through. I am so very interested in your plan for the next few years, how you are going to be pulling yourself through what I feel are gonna be some very interesting, and by interesting, I mean terrible times. So feel free to shout me out a holler. This episode will be on my website at books by d l white dot bookcast.com/107. You can also hit this episode on my substack, or you can shoot me an email. It's author d l white at books by d l white dot com. I'm sorry.

DL White [00:37:54]:

It's author d l at books by d l white dot com. I welcome your comments, questions, feedback, what have you. That brings us to the end of today's show. So I will bid you adieu, but not before thanking you so much for joining me for today's chat. I really enjoy having you here. Again, I welcome any comments or feedback at books by dlwhite.com/bookcast/107. You'll find full show notes, links to all the things I talked about if they're relevant, and a transcript for today's show. Please share the podcast if you really enjoyed the sound of my voice as I appear to.

DL White [00:38:37]:

And if you listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or Substack, give a girl a rating, a comment, a hand clap, a re a repost, restack. I really appreciate it. Do not forget, you can support this podcast with your book purchases at payhipdot com slash books by dlwhite by spreading the good word, like repost all my social media, what have you, by joining the newsletter or the substack. The links will be on my website at books by dlwhite.com/linkinbio. You can also buy you can also throw some coins in the hat at book cast.buzzprout.com. Thank you so much to my monthly supporters. Your gift covers my Buzzsprout subscription. I really appreciate the support and as a thank you, I have added you to comped users at short fiction by dlwhite.substack.com.

DL White [00:39:31]:

So people who support the pod people who support the podcast with their funds are automatically added to subscribers on the short fiction substack, so they get access to everything that is available to paid subscribers over there. I figured that would be a nice little perk. The broadcast is written, produced, and edited by me, d r White. Our theme music and any sound effects are provided by. I will be back next week. Until then, please enjoy your weekend. Have a superlative week, and we'll chat again soon. Bye bye.

[fearfulkittenwrites]

“Just a normal night”

Inspired by @s-mscott​ - link for the art, please check it out!

Word count: 2832

Notes: HEY. THIS IS JUST BEEN SITTING ON MY FILES FOR THE LONGEST TIME AND I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT IT DKJFHAKJHAKJDFH. Anyway, it's a long time coming. The writing probs isn't as neat or as good as the latest uploads bc of that, but... idk. Hopefully it's good! I couldn't bring myself to edit it again, sorry about that. I hope you can enjoy it anyways and please go check out the artist, @s-mscott​!

“Guys?” Dick asked, on his tiptoes as he rummaged through every cabinet in the huge kitchen “Hey are we out of cereal? I can’t find my Lucky Charms anywhere.”

“I think so.” Jason answered “I ate the last of the Lucky Charms last night.”

“Yep.” Tim said, popping the ‘p’ as he slid through the countertop, landing a bit behind Dick “I had the last of the frosted flakes two days ago.”

“Froot Loops?” Dick asked.

“I had those.” Duke answered “Sorry.”

“Fruity Pebbles?”

 Cass raised her hand, looking at the ground.

“Reese’s Puffs?”

“I finished the box yesterday.” Damian announced, crossing his arms as he leaned against the marble sink.

“Damn.” Dick murmured and pouted as he closed the cabinet’s door “I’ve been craving cereal today.”

“We can always go get some.” Jason shrugged.

“At three in the morning?” Duke asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Actually, four.” Jason corrected, putting up a finger “And yeah, why not? I mean, we had a hard patrol tonight, and if Dick wants some cereal, I say let’s go get some cereal.”

“It’s four in the morning, Todd.” Damian said.

“I mean, the closest Walmart is open 24/7.” Tim interfered.

“You can’t be seriously considering this, Grayson.” Damian frowned at his older brother.

“Why not? I’m not sleepy anyways.” Dick crossed his arms and shrugged.

“Yes!” Jason hissed “Late night adventures with the baby bats. Let’s roll!” He clapped his hands once, and started to walk out of the kitchen, his siblings following him to the garage.

“Oh wait!” Dick said “Let’s ring up Bruce and see if there’s anything else we need.”

“Bold of you to assume he’d know what we need.” Tim interfered.

“Yeah, well, it’s worth a shot. Plus, do any of us really want to wake up Alfred to ask him?” Dick said, taking his communicator out of his pocket and placing it in his ear “B? Have a sec?” He asked

“Nightwing. What’s wrong?” Came the answer, Batman’s raspy voice flowing through the device.

“Oh, nothing’s wrong. We’re going to take a quick trip to the supermarket, I wanted to ask if you need anything.”

“... At four in the morning?”

“Yeah. Do you need anything?”

Bruce sighed.

“We’re running out of the coffee blend that Tim likes. Alfred the cat’s favorite treats have been gone since last week, and Cass’ favorite ice cream is done. Oh, buy Duke that soda he likes, I drank the last can. Also, Jason’s cookies and that brand of chips you like, we ran out of those. Oh, and buy something with Iron in it, I’m worried that Damian might not be getting enough.”

“Like spinach?” Dick said, writing it down on his phone’s notes.

“Yeah, that’ll do. Ah, and we’re a little low on milk.”

“Okay. Will keep that in mind. Thanks B, have a nice patrol.”

“Please don’t give the papers any headlines.”

“You got it, B. Bye.”

He placed the device back on his pocket.

“Okay, there’s a lot of stuff to buy, so let’s get going. I’ll drive.”

“Shotgun!” Jason yelled.

“We’re taking the S.U.V., one of you will need to ride in the trunk.” Dick said.

“I’ll go.” Cass’ eyes twinkled. No one could understand why she was always so fascinated with the idea of riding in the trunk, but she seemed to find it fun and all of them thought that her excitement was cute.

“Alright then.” Dick smiled, ruffling her hair. Her grin grew wider, and Duke set her hair straight again before they got into the car.

“Hey, can I play my music?” Tim asked from the backseat.

“Don’t force us to listen to the atrocity Drake calls music, Grayson.” Damian complained, arms crossed “Let me play something.”

“Uh, I’d rather not listen to Mozart and Bach while we’re in the car.” Duke protested.

“It’s called classic for a reason, Thomas.”

“Doesn’t matter, bat-brat.” Jason said “I’m with him on this one. Besides, universal car rules, shotgun DJ’s.”

“Since when?” Tim asked.

“Since now.” Jason said, plugging his phone in.

“Uh, I don’t think so.” Dick took the cord from him “According to ‘Supernatural’ rules, ‘Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole’. So that’s mine.”

“No one else watches this show Dickhead!” Jason pulled the cord back.

“Doesn’t matter, because I’m older!” Dick pulled it back again.

“Age is just a number!” Tim pushed himself to the front seat and took the cord back.

“Great point Drake!” Damian pulled him back by his waist, stealing the cord from him too.

“Hey, stop with the fuss, I’m gonna crash the car!” Dick said.

“Maybe we should just play Beyoncé...” Duke suggested. The car went silent for a while.

“Okay.” Dick said “Put on ‘Single Ladies’.”

“No. ‘Halo’ is her best.” Damian complained.

“Uhm, no way? I’m playing ‘Drunk in Love’, and that’s it.” Tim shot back.

“Are you crazy? Play ‘Formation’.” Duke interfered.

“I like ‘Run the World’...” Cass said quietly from the trunk.

“Yeah, okay,” Tim murmured “We’ll play that.”

The girl smiled as the first notes from the song filled the car.

There weren’t many cars in the parking lot, which was expected. They picked up two carts, and Dick hopped inside the one Jason was pushing.

“Dude!” Duke started “You’re in your mid-twenties!”

“Leave me alone, I nearly sprained my ankle today.” Dick stuck his tongue out. No one else questioned anything beyond that. The employees simply sighed, used to the two older brothers and their antics.

“Hey Parker.” Jason greeted the nighttime security guard.

“Hey. I see you two brought the whole gang tonight.” He answered.

“Yup.” Dick smiled.

“So this is a regular thing for the two of you?” Duke asked.

“Are you really surprised, Duke?” Tim shot back.

“No. Not really.”

“Okay. First stop, Bruce said we need to get Tim’s coffee.” Dick exclaimed, looking at the list.

Jason led the way, Dick grinning like a child on the cart, Cass quietly following as she pushed their second cart, Duke making friendly conversation with her while Tim and Damian kept bickering right behind them.

“Oh, wait!” Dick held on to the metal bars “We’re right next to the cookies and Bruce said we’re out of your favorites, Jay.” He looked up.

“Alright, a little detour then.” Jason turned them around, quickly grabbing his treats “Anyone wants anything else from this aisle?”

“But... We don’t need anything else from the aisle.” Duke pointed out.

“Um, we have a billionaire’s credit card?” Tim said “Bruce won’t freak out if we buy a few extra things.”

“Uuuh, they have those koala shaped cookies!” Dick hopped out of the cart “How many do I get?”

“I want one.” Cass said.

“Chocolate or strawberries?”

“Uh… I want both.” She answered.

“Okay, one each for the lady, two strawberries for me...”

“I want a chocolate one.” Tim said.

“Me too.” Damian asked.

“Oh, just take twenty boxes, ten of each flavor.” Jason interfered, dumping them on Cass’ cart “We’ll share later.”

“Oh my God, those are expensive!” Duke said, exasperated.

“Yeah. So?” Jason shot back.

“Bruce is a billionaire, bro. He won’t mind.” Dick said, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Yeah, well, it’s easy for you guys to say it. You grew up like that. It’s kinda hard to accept this when you aren’t used to having so much.” Duke answered, scratching his neck.

“Hey, I get that feeling lil’ bro.” Jason tapped his back “I spent my childhood in Gotham’s streets.”

“Yeah. I mean, I grew up in the circus. I wasn’t used to the idea of getting brand new stuff instead of asking for hand-me-downs from our friends whenever I grew out of my clothes.” Dick interfered.

“But... Just think about it like this.” Jason got closer to him “We now can get everything we couldn’t in the past.”

Duke frowned. Jason nodded encouragingly.

“That... Doesn’t help.”

“I tried.” Jason shrugged. Dick hopped back in the cart “To the coffee aisle!” He exclaimed, pushing his brother around.

“Hang on.” Tim said “This is where they leave the energy drinks. Let me take some.”

“Why do you insist on drinking this crap, Drake?” Damian scowled, reading the label in one of the cans “If you have such a death wish, jumping in front of a train is a much cheaper, quicker alternative.”

“Shut up, little devil.” Tim picked up cans from his favorite brand.

“Jason, push me a little farther down the aisle, please.” Dick asked “They keep their iced teas over there.”

“Ugh, Grayson, you disgust me.” Damian rolled his eyes.

“Don’t be so judgemental Lil’ D.” He smiled, being pushed away by Jason.

As they examined the cans, Dick noticed he had attracted the looks of a middle aged man, a couple of steps from them. He was staring at his hoodie, that contained the frase ‘I love dick’ printed on it.

“Oh,” He exclaimed, smiling at the guy “My name is Richard. That’s why it’s funny.” The man nodded “I’m also queer as fuck, so that makes it better.” He added nonchalantly, and the man’s eyes widened “Okay Jay, I picked up all I wanted, let’s go back.”

“Alright you little shits, back to the coffee quest.” Jason said, leading the way once again. This time, they finally made it to the coffee aisle. Tim crouched down, looking for his favorite blend.

Cass got a little curious once she laid eyes on a colorful package on the top shelf. She picked it up and handed it to Dick.

“Read. Please.”

“This is an espresso roast. Here it says that it has notes of strawberry? Vanilla and... Sugar cane. Colombian coffee. Seems nice. Wanna take it?”

“Yes.” She nodded. Dick dropped it on his cart.

Cass wandered away, still looking at all of the coffee blends.

“Hey girlie,” A guy whistled at her, next to his group of friends “Nice ass.”

She squinted at them.

“Yo, asshole!” Tim screamed, getting their attention “That’s our sister!” He threw a bag of coffee beans at the guy’s face, causing his nose to bleed.

“Hey, who do you think you are?” One of them started to walk up to her brothers. Cass could tell that he wanted trouble, so she grabbed his arm and slammed his face against the shelf, so quickly and brutally that it barely budged, leaving the products unbothered, but the guy fell to the floor, disoriented. She stared at him.

“We are Waynes.” Damian answered, pacing towards them quietly, hands on his pockets “I suggest you apologize immediately for the troubles, if you wouldn’t want to get a hefty lawsuit for your harrasment.”

“Uh, sorry bro.” One of them started, a little scared “We didn’t-”

“Not to me.” He interrupted “To her.”

“We’re sorry, miss Wayne.” All of them mumbled.

“Now promise you won’t do it again.” Damian added.

“We won’t do it again.” They started at the floor, next to where their fallen friend laid down.

“Good.” He squinted “Help your friend up, and get out of my sight.”

They did as they were told, helping his friend walk straight again. As Cass headed back, Dick gently touched her arm, looking up at her.

“Hey, are you alright?” She smiled and gave him a thumbs up. He smiled back.

“Does this happen often?” Jason asked.

“Sometimes.” She shrugged “But they always say sorry after I break their nose.”

“Ayy, that’s our girl.” Jason praised “Alright, we got the coffee. Where to next?”

“Let’s see... Next item is Alfred the cat’s treats.” Dick said.

“Ha!” Damian laughed loudly “As if Alfred would eat the... peasant treats that this store offers. No. I’ve already bought the adequate brand from an online shop.”

“Okay...” Dick raised an eyebrow “Then... Cass’ ice cream is next, but I think we should leave that as the last item, so it won’t melt, which leads us to Duke’s soda because Bruce had the last can.”

“Let’s go then. I think that the cereal aisle is on the way, so we’ll get that first.” Jason said, pushing the cart around again.

“Which ones do we get?” Tim asked, looking through the shelf.

“Everything that has sugar.” Dick answered. His brother began handing him boxes, when they heard a small whisper.

“Oh my God, are those...?” A girl said to her friend, attracting the eyes of the siblings. The duo averted their gaze quickly. Cass frowned at them.

“Relax.” Jason smiled, placing an arm on her back “They’re probably just... Fans.”

“Fans?” She asked, still staring suspiciously at them.

“Yeah.” Dick shrugged “I mean, we’re not super stars, but we do hit the papers pretty often. A bunch of people know us here in Gotham.” The girls were looking again, and Dick gave them a small wave, making them giggle “See? Nothing to worry about.”

“Hum.”

“Hey there, ladies.” Jason greeted, a cheeky smile on his face “What brings you to this fine establishment tonight?”

“We ran out of energy drinks.” One of them answered “What about you?”

“Cereal.” Dick answered, lifting two boxes. They giggled again.

“Hey, um... can we maybe get a picture?” The girl asked “It’s just that... no one will believe us when we tell them about this.”

“Absolutely not!” Damian answered.

“Nah, don’t listen to the little brat.” Jason said “Go ahead.”

Dick held up the boxes again, smiling as Jason made a ‘crazy’ motion with his hands. Tim turned around as the photo was being taken, turning him into a blurr with tired eyes.

“Can we get some selfies too?” The other one asked, grinning.

“No!” Damian protested again.

“Of course you can!” Dick said “Duke, Cass, come here.” He called.

All of them gathered around the cart Dick was staying at, even Damian. He didn’t look so pleased as the photo was taken, but neither did Cass.

“Thanks. You guys really are nice.” The first girl said.

“Oh, you have no clue on how nice I can be.” Jason winked, making her blush “Tell you what, why don’t I give you my phone number and you can text me those pictures later, hm?”

“Sure.” The girl bit her lips as Jason scribbled his number on her wrist.

“You are such a flirt.” Dick rolled his eyes as the girls walked away.

“What, like you aren’t?” Jason snorted, pushing him away, looking for where they kept the soda.

“I think Cass didn’t like that interaction very much.” Tim whispered to his older brothers, who turned around to find a frowning baby bat. Jason chuckled.

“What’s wrong, sis?” She scowled at him “Oh, c’mon, don’t get jealous.” He threw an arm around her shoulder “You know you’ll always be our number one girl, but a guy has his needs. And sometimes, a guy needs a date.”

Cass pushed him away, rolling her eyes as Duke placed five soda cans on her cart.

“Why would you even drink this sugar filled monstrosity, Thomas?” Damian asked, reading the labels “Grandfather wouldn’t even feed his prisoners something as revolting as this.”

“Because, Bat-brat,” He said “We’re all entitled to enjoy at least one or two things that may ultimately be responsible for our deaths.”

“I suppose.” He murmured, lifting an eyebrow “You make much finer points than the rest of them. Father has been looking for heirs in the least suitable places, I assume.” He clicked his tongue “It’s a good thing I’m here to help.”

“Okay...” Duke answered, raising his eyebrows and averting his gaze. There was only so much strangeness that he could handle.

“Great, now we need to get my chips and spinach.” Dick stated.

“Spinach?” Tim asked “Why spinach?”

“B thinks Damian may have been needing more iron in his diet.” Dick shrugged.

“Aaw.” Tim said “That’s actually kinda cute. Do you think he ever worries about our diets?”

“Don’t be stupid Tim, of course he doesn’t.” Jason answered.

“He does.” Dick shot back “He worries about us, he just... Really, really, really, reaaaally sucks at showing it sometimes.”

“Potatoe, potatoe.” Jason murmured.

“Yeah, whatever. Keep me moving Little Wing, we have stuff to pick up and my tiredness is catching up to me.” Dick pointed forward.

“Sure. But the chips are in the opposite direction.”

“Well turn me around then, do you want me to look like an idiot?” Dick said, a little exasperated.

“I wish you had an off button sometimes.” Jason sighed as he made his way to the chips section.

An employee, mopping the floor with a bored expression, looked up from what he was doing when he saw the Wayne gang talking loudly. Dick tried to control his brothers from inside the cart, and had just told Jason to separate a fight between Tim and Damian. Duke and Cass snicker as they saw a bored, six feet tall Jason pushing his much smaller brothers apart.

“Yep.” The employee murmured to himself “Billionaires shopping at Walmart at four in the morning. Just a normal night.”

Hey! If you made it this far, please consider reblogging this? It helps with spreading my fics and it makes me very happy, hahahaha!

Regardless, thanks for reading <3

[ibelongtowrath]

Skipping The Previews - MLQC (Ling Xiao/Shaw) NSFW

Summary: You decide to go see a movie to take your mind off of everything that's going on in the world, but a sexy stranger thinks it's a good idea to take the seat right next to yours. Rating: Explicit! 18+ NSFW Relationship: Ling Xiao x Female Reader, Shaw x Female Reader, Tags: oral sex, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, fingerfucking, shameless smut, semi-public sex Word Count: 5,707

Read on AO3

Notes: I've been wanting to write something about Shaw ever since I've seen pictures of him & finally encountered him in MLQC and whew...I know he's going to wreck my Kiro and Gavin biases! I wanted to portray him as kind of cocky, since I got that kind of vibe from him, and I hope I managed to capture that essence here. Please keep in mind that I started writing this before movie theaters were shut & things began getting very serious. I was thinking of a scenario where the reader would be upset that Shaw sits directly next to her, and a reason that the theater might still be empty for them to fuck freely in lol. Please enjoy!

It’s midday Saturday, and the movie theater is practically deserted. Carefully, you push the handicap button with your elbow, allowing the doors to open so you don’t have to physically grab them. Everyone is supposed to be doing mandated social distancing, staying six feet away from other humans at all times, until they can get the spread of the virus under control. Going to see a movie in the midst of a pandemic is not the smartest idea, but you want to take advantage of being able to go out as much as you possibly can before we’re all in lockdown. A good science-fiction action movie will take your mind off of things, even if only temporarily.

Grabbing your favorite drink from the Freestyle machine, a Cherry Coke, you walk towards the theater the movie will be playing in. On your way there, you pass the mirror by the exit of the women’s bathroom, and take a quick peek at your reflection. You’re not exactly sure why you bothered with putting so much effort into your appearance when hardly anyone will see it. Shrugging and fluffing your hair quickly in the mirror, you turn back and continue walking into the theater.

You had picked the seat all the way in the furthest corner of the theater, away from everyone else. Even if there was no social distancing rule, you would have picked it anyway. You settle down into the recliner, the leather cold as it touches your bare legs. It’s an unseasonably warm March day today, and you’re wearing shorts for the first time since September. 

Pushing the button, you recline the chair virtually as far as it will go. The theater is completely vacant, and you pray it stays that way. There’s still about 15 minutes before the previews start, and you decide to pass the time browsing your Instagram explore page, watching makeup application videos and laughing at a couple cute and funny cat videos. You’re so fixated on one particular video of a rather chonky cat, you don’t notice the handsome stranger settling into the seat directly next to yours.

You had pushed the middle armrests up to give yourself more space, and when you hear the strange crinkling sound next to you, you’re confused, because you haven’t moved. Your eyes dart to to left, and widen in shock when they meet the gaze of a gorgeous stranger’s; an amber, honey-colored hue you can’t help but stare into. 

You try to keep your expression neutral, but he’s so attractive, it’s hard to keep your composure. His lavender-grey locks of hair fall messily, but carefully at the same time, over his face, framing it perfectly, some of his fringe falling into his golden eyes. You resist the urge to touch the locks of his hair, to sweep them out of the way, so you can better admire the beautiful flecks of gold and honey in that gaze. His purple and black hoodie, darker in hue than his hair, perfectly compliments the color of his eyes. He wears a black choker around his neck, and jeans that are messily, but intentionally, ripped at the knees. Several hoop earrings adorn his ears, a cuff hugging the upper cartilage of his left ear.

Breaking off his gaze, you feel yourself blushing furiously, the heat spreading to your cheeks like a wildfire. Thank goodness you put on a bit of foundation today, so he can’t see the furious rush of red that must be stretched across your face. You notice his hands, the right one wearing a fingerless glove, clutching his phone. The other is bare, a maroon beaded necklace decorating the wrist.

“Is this seat taken, love?” he asks, his lips turning up on one side, flashing you the cockiest grin you’ve ever seen. He knows the answer, obviously trying to provoke you. 

Not wanting to give him the satisfaction, despite feeling your heart  thump, thump -ing loudly against your chest, you turn your gaze towards the screen. An ad for an interactive mobile game is playing on the projector. 

“Aw, come on, don’t be like that,” the stranger says, a hint of annoyance in his voice.

“In the case that you’ve been blissfully ignorant, which is probable,” you respond, gaze hardening on the screen before you, “we’re supposed to be staying at least six feet from other people.”

“Damn, you’ve got some bite.” He grins at you.

Running his fingers through his hair, he continues. “Yeah, I’ve seen the news. Been wanting to see this movie, though. I saw only one person had bought a ticket, so I bought the seat next to ‘em. I was hoping it would be next to a pretty girl. I was right.”

You turn to look at him, an incredulous look on your face. The compliment is flattering, but he doesn’t have to know that. You try to keep your best poker face on.

“And you thought that was a good idea?” you retort. 

It comes out with less bite than you intended, now that you’re looking at him directly. His devastatingly good looks are working their charm on you, and he picks up on it. The cocky smirk returns, a glint of something mischievous flashing in his eye. He knows you’re faltering, and he fully plans on persuading you.

“I thought it would be a good opportunity to get to know each other.” 

You can’t help but continue to stare at him, in complete awe of his audacity.

“Figured if you turned out to be some random dude, I’d just go sit in another seat. No big deal.” 

He shrugs, but that wild glint is still in his eye. In the pause that follows, he takes the time to look you over. His gaze lingers on your full lips, then drops to the swell of your breasts beneath your t-shirt. It continues downward, to the curves of your waist and hips outfitted in your favorite pair of short black shorts.

Feeling slightly self-conscious under the weight of his scrutinizing gaze, you unconsciously drop your hands into your lap and look down. You know you should get up and find another seat, or at the very least try harder to make him move. Some feeling you can’t quite place is anchoring you to your current spot. Is it...excitement? Is it arousal?  No. No way .

The previews should be starting in a few minutes, and you’re thankful for the coming distraction.

“Name’s Shaw, by the way.” His voice suddenly cuts through the silence between the advertisements on screen.

Crossing your arms, you look to your left. You decide it can’t hurt, telling him your name. 

“ Y/N ,” you tell him. “It’s nice to meet you, Shaw.”

“Likewise,  Y/N ,” Shaw replies. 

The smirk reappears, but more playful. It doesn’t quite match the look in those topaz eyes. The determination is still there, and you brace yourself for whatever he’s going to try saying next. You know, deep down, that his unrelenting perseverance, charm and good looks might just be your undoing.

Shaw reaches for something behind him. He pulls out an orange bag of Reese’s Pieces, slightly shaking it so the peanut butter and chocolate pieces clink together. He opens the bag, grabs a handful, and drops them in his mouth, his tongue sticking out to catch the pieces in case they fall. You can’t help but stare at the pink wetness and length of his tongue, wondering what it would be like to kiss him and feel it on your own…

Whoa, where did that thought come from ? you ask yourself, confused. Your face feels like an inferno yet again. As if sensing your thoughts, he audibly crunches the candy in his mouth. He swallows, and grins at you.

“Want some, pretty girl? Looking like you do,” Shaw asks, tilting the bag towards you. 

He knows you were staring, and not at the bag of candy.

“U-um...sure,” you stammer, poorly attempting to keep your composure. 

You hold out your hands, cupping them, fully expecting Shaw to pour the mini candies into your palm. Instead, that devilish glint returning to his amber eyes, he pours the yellow and orange candy pieces into his own hand. Confused, you feel your brow furrow slightly, wondering what he’s planning on doing.

Before you can react, Shaw closes the already short distance between you on the recliners. He pushes himself over and encroaches into your personal space. You feel the heat of his body next to yours, his jeans-clad leg brushing up against your bare skin. Your nerve endings feel electrified, your heart beating so hard, it feels like it could explode through your chest at any second.

Shaw leans in, as though he weren’t already close enough. His face is now mere inches from yours. You feel your eyes widen in shock. This close up, his eyes are even more mesmerizing. His skin is perfect, blemish-free, and his lips look so soft, so inviting…He lifts his gloved hand towards your face, fingers lightly brushing your jaw. Then, moving his hand up to your face, he strokes your lips gently with his thumb.

Nonplussed by his move, you feel frozen. You’re unsure of how to react. At the same time, his close proximity and the softness of his skin as he caresses your lips causes goosebumps to flare on your legs and up and down your arms. You start to feel the excitement building within. Giving in to the feeling, you can feel the arousal beginning to pool in your underwear...all caused by this handsome stranger. With a wicked grin, Shaw places his thumb between your lips, pushing against them lightly.

“Open wide, pretty girl,” he coos. 

You part your mouth at his command, your excitement unable to be contained. 

“That’s a good girl,” he murmurs. 

He takes his hand, fingers tilting your chin up. With the other hand holding the candy, he drops them in your mouth slowly, the pieces clinking together when they land on your tongue. He takes his hand away as you close your mouth and chew the candy, bursts of chocolate and peanut butter dancing on your tongue. You swallow, looking at Shaw again, just as the theater lights begin to dim. The previews are starting, and the theater is still deserted.

With that sexy stunt, you feel your chest beginning to rise and fall a little faster. You try to control your breathing. The tension between the two of you escalates with every breath. With that mischievous expression still on his face, Shaw reaches his hand out and cradles your face in his hand.

“Do you want some more, love?” asks Shaw, talking over the volume of the first preview that has begun playing on the screen. 

He runs his tongue over his teeth, almost taunting you. Fully aware of the dangerous double entendre in his words, you feel your arousal escalate, almost unbearable at this point. 

Instead of answering him, you gently grab Shaw’s hand, moving it upwards, towards your lips.��

Deciding to give him a double meaning of your own, you find yourself opening your mouth a bit wider, wrapping your tongue around his index finger. You close your lips around it. He tastes like the sweet candies. You run your tongue underneath his finger softly, then slowly pull it out of your mouth. 

You’re feeling powerful and sexy in the way Shaw is now gaping at you, completely turned on. His expression quickly changes back to his usual cocky, lopsided grin.

“What’s that you said earlier about being six feet apart?” he teases, leaning in towards your ear, so close you can feel his breath tickling the side of your neck. 

He lightly nibbles at the lobe, then moves lower. He kisses your neck, adding another gentle bite. You feel yourself shudder in delight. It’s easy to forget you’re sitting in a movie theater and someone could walk in at any second.

Shaw continues leaving red marks, from your jaw to where your t-shirt begins. He pulls the fabric down, revealing your shoulder, kissing and nibbling. You whimper, your excitement and desperation getting harder and harder to hide with every bite. You feel your nipples starting to harden against the lacey cups of your bra. Sensing your agony, Shaw lifts his head up and grasps your face softly yet firmly.

“Look at you. Getting all hot and bothered,” he coos, his silky voice causing your legs to tremble. 

His hand still holding your face, Shaw lightly turns your head towards his, then crushes his mouth against yours. It muffles your cry of shock, quickly turning it into a gasp of pleasure. You lean further into him, deepening the kiss. You bite his lower lip and cause a slight groan to escape from his mouth. You use this opportunity to meet your tongue with his, hungrily massaging them together. 

Unable to hold back any longer, the titillating stimulation having completely drenched your panties, you break off the kiss. You can feel the excess saliva shining on your chin. You turn to face Shaw, stand up. Then, you swing your leg seamlessly and straddle him, feeling the hardness of his erection between your legs. The leather chair crinkles loudly as you move. He places his hands on your hips, hooking his thumbs through the belt hoops of your tiny black shorts.

“You bad girl,” Shaw taunts, hot breath tickling your ear. “What if someone sees?”

“Then they’re going to get a show,” you quip, silencing him with your tongue.

After a minute, or who knows how long - you’ve long since stopped trying to keep track of time - he pulls away from your hungry kisses, burying his head in your neck, kissing the sensitive skin. You feel Shaw start to lift up your shirt, revealing your lacy black bra. 

His hands run slowly, deliciously up your abdomen. It starts from your hips, tracing the curves of your waist, and finally reaches the band of your bra, slipping his fingers underneath the silky fabric in one fluid motion. Goosebumps dart across your skin at his touch.

His fingers dance across the skin under the band so deliciously, you’re aching for more. When they reach the cups, he pushes them up, your breasts bouncing and spilling out with the sudden freedom. The exposure causes your heart to leap from your chest, but thankfully, no one else is around. You’ve never done something so lewd in public before.

Continuing to kiss your neck, his hands cup your breasts, caressing them gently. Shaw pinches and rolls your nipples between his thumb and index fingers, shooting pleasure straight down between your legs.

He begins his journey of bites and kisses again down your body again, moving from your neck, and down to your breasts. You feel him tonguing your nipple, lightly sucking as his tongue dances across the sensitive skin. He continues with his talented fingers on your other breast. 

"Mph!” 

You moan, hardly caring about how loud you’re being. All the self-control you tried so desperately to cling onto has been washed away by the hands of a sexy stranger.

The possibility of being caught heightens the adrenaline pumping through your veins. Your desire now akin to a fire, every touch of Shaw’s on your skin only serves to stoke it further. Each nibble, each caress, sends jolts of electricity through your body. Your nerve endings feel as though they’re out of control, each stimulation causing more sensitivity. You bite your lip with the pleasure of it.

Deciding it’s time that Shaw shows some skin of his own, your hands reach up under his loose sweatshirt. Fingers moving delicately, you trace the taut ridges of his abdominal muscles. Taking your cue, he lifts the fabric, pulling it further up. It’s giving you - and anyone who might walk into the theater, for that matter - a full view of his perfectly-sculpted body.

You run your hands up and down the length of his abdomen, drawing heavy breaths from Shaw. His chest rises and falls more rapidly. You lean forward then, lips on his neck, sucking the skin into your mouth. Then, you move over his defined clavicles and pecs, returning the love bites he had so graciously gifted you not much earlier. 

He gasps in pleasure, placing both hands on your ass, barely covered by the fabric of your tiny shorts. He squeezes it as you grind your hips against his thighs. 

Shaw’s hands move to the button of your shorts, undoing it quickly and pulling the zipper down. Your matching black panties peek out from the opening. He pulls them forward slightly, then slips two fingers in. 

He ventures down slowly into your folds, the other hand gripping your inner thigh. A lewd noise escapes from your lips, and you hear Shaw’s breath hitch at the sound of your desperation.

You’re so wet, Shaw’s fingers slide up and down with ease. They linger around your swollen clit, begging to be touched. He teases it with his fingers, sending delicious waves of pleasure up your spine. 

Suddenly, he pulls his fingers out, the sudden absence of them making you hungrier. Your desire is even more fierce. Your pussy is begging to be filled, and you can feel yourself clenching in frustration at having to wait.

Holding up his hand, you see the evidence of your arousal that coats his middle and ring fingers, slick and shiny in the light of the screen behind you.

“Naughty, naughty girl. Getting so turned on in a place like this.” 

He sounds so proud, so full of himself. You lean back slightly, placing some distance between your bodies. Looking down at the sizable bulge in his jeans, seeing that he’s quite obviously just as turned on as you are, you feel your eyebrows raise at him.

“I could say the same for you,” you purr, your voice as smooth as velvet.

Shaw looks at you then, drinking in the sight of you. Lips pink and swollen, your eyes, half-closed and shiny, glazed over with lust, your hair messily falling around your shoulders. T-shirt and bra pushed up, bare breasts bouncing with every movement. His eyes fall on the delicious pinkish-red trail of love bites leading from your neck to your breasts...all in this very public setting. 

He draws a sharp breath in, his cock straining harder against the constricting fabric of his jeans. Excitement is etched all over his skin. He knows he should stop, but he doesn’t want to, and he’s hoping you don’t want to either.

“What are you going to do about it?” Shaw tilts his head up at you, and you recognize the challenge in his words.

“You’ll see.”

Half of your brain screams at you to stop, to end this now before it goes too far. The other half eggs you on, telling you that you only live once. The metaphorical angel and devil sit on your shoulders, each giving you a reason to listen to them. Grinning, you decide to turn towards the devil, abandoning all common sense. The thrill and the pleasure are overloading your senses. All rationale and reasoning are being completely thrown out the window.

You find your hands on the button of Shaw’s jeans, unbuttoning them, and pulling the zipper down slowly. You hook your fingers into the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down. After a few seconds, his fully-erect cock springs out. You widen your eyes in surprise at his length and girth. You’re a bit nervous about your ability to fit him, but you never back down from a challenge.

You grasp a hand around his erection, jerking him up and down a few times. You tease your thumb around the head, drawing out ragged breaths from Shaw. You remove your hand from his cock and, without a second thought, you stand up. Shaw watches you in anticipation. 

The rush is so satisfying, you never want it to end. You’re in complete shock at yourself for feeling like this. What happened to the careful, cautious girl whose motto was “better safe than sorry?”

She’s dead and gone now .

Feeling the adrenaline blazing a trail through your veins, you sink slowly to your knees in front of Shaw’s seat, your eyes never leaving him. His eyes widen, realizing what you’re about to do, and he scoots forward to the edge of the seat.

“You’re crazy!” laughs Shaw, teasing but obviously delighted. “Crazy, crazy girl.” 

You grin, accepting it as a compliment. The adrenaline rush gains more and more momentum. You can feel your pussy throbbing. Your black lacy underwear is completely soaked with the anticipation.

You lean in, grasping his length in your hand, jerking it up and down in slow, tantalizing motions. His pre-cum leaks out, and you dip your tongue into his slit, tasting and lapping up the salty fluid. Removing your hand from his shaft, you use your thumb to caress his head. You run your tongue over the length of his dick, back and forth, as though you’re tasting the most delicious ice cream you’ve ever tasted. 

Shaw looks down at you then: reddened lips, swollen and moist with spit. He inhales sharply, leaning back against the chair as he does so.

Sufficiently lubricated with your saliva, you breathe deep. You open your mouth, accepting his generously-sized dick into it. You’re swallowing around it, your cheeks hollowing with the effort. You’ve never deepthroated any guy as big as him before, and you feel your throat rebelling in protest at the new challenge. You manage to quell the gag and relax your throat muscles. 

His dick fully engulfed in the wet heat of your mouth and throat, you hear Shaw let out a ragged, breathy moan: 

“Fuck, oh, fuck…”

He leans forward again, threading his fingers through your hair. The sudden action forces his cock a little further down your throat than you’d intended. This time, you can’t control the small gag that escapes you. Tears form in your eyes; one manages to escape, and falls down your face. Thankfully, Shaw doesn’t notice, and you continue your movement: back, and forth, swirling your tongue up and down his shaft as you move to the rhythm of a song nobody else can hear. 

Having lost track of time, you continue. The loud music and explosions of a preview of some new action movie is playing behind you. You feel his dick twitch, knowing he’s close.

“F-Fuck, you’re gonna make me cum, pretty girl…” Shaw groans, stroking your hair.

A few seconds later, Shaw finally releases, shooting hot white ropes down your throat. You move your head back, slowly pulling him out of your mouth. You grasp his length once again and slowly move your hand up and down. More of his cum leaks out onto your lips, dribbling onto your chin. He looks down at you then, riding out the final throes of his orgasm as you lick your lips with a grin. You catch the slightly bitter white fluid on your tongue and make a big show of swallowing.

Shaw sits back against the cool leather of the recliner, panting, trying to control his breathing. He grins, the corner of his lip turned up, feeling amused. He can’t believe you had the balls - no pun intended - to suck him off in the movie theater. He thought he would be lucky if he got your phone number, especially considering how cold you were to him at the beginning. Pulling his underwear and jeans back up, he stands up suddenly. He looks at you, still on your knees. 

“Stand up,” he tells you, and you follow his command, getting up slowly. You feel your legs shake slightly.

“Sit.”

You sit, in the same space Shaw had been sitting just seconds ago, the chair still warm from his body heat. Without warning, Shaw is now on his knees. Just as quickly, he starts pulling down your shorts and lacy black panties over your legs and feet, discarding them on the floor. You gasp in shock. That cocky upturned smirk returning for the umpteenth time, Shaw revels in your surprise.

“Just returning the favor, yeah?”

Before you can react, he forces your knees apart, spreading your legs. You whimper, slightly ashamed that you’re in this very compromised position. The hunger grows in Shaw’s steady amber gaze. Your pussy is now on full display, the fleshy pink skin coated in the clear fluid evidence of your arousal. 

Shaw begins by hooking his arms around the bottoms of your thighs. He slowly kisses the sensitive skin of your inner thigh, moving closer and closer to where you want him to be most. Your desire feels like agony. It’s like a thirst dying to be quenched, a growling hunger aching to be quelled. After what feels like forever, you feel his tongue flicking at your clit. The sensation sends jolts of pleasure and electricity up through your abdomen and into your chest. 

“Shaw!” you hear yourself crying out his name, overtaken by the combination of pleasure and adrenaline. The fire spreads through your body like a wildfire.

Unhooking an arm from around your thigh, Shaw inserts two fingers into your pussy. They fuck you while his talented tongue works its magic on your clit, alternating between sucking and massaging. His fingers curl up as he plunges them in and out of you, massaging your g-spot. 

Shaw suddenly pulls away from you then, his voice husky. 

“Oh, baby girl, you’re going to be making a mess of that seat.”

He continues his song and dance of getting you off. The combination of his fingers and tongue is almost too much to bear, and you begin to feel the heat between your legs start to rise uncontrollably. You know you’re close, and can feel the pressure building. 

Within seconds, you feel the orgasm reach its crescendo, trails of fire burning from your hips up into your abdomen. Your heart pounds as you dissolve into the pleasure. At the same time, as though in sync, a loud gun “BANG!” sounds off, playing from the preview on the large screen. 

You arch your back, riding it out, savoring the delicious electricity pulsing through your most sensitive nerve endings. There’s a sudden gushing feeling between your legs. Realizing you just squirted for the first time, you clap your hand over your mouth in embarrassment and excitement. The fluid leaks down your leg, pooling on the underside of your thighs.

“You didn’t tell me you were a squirter,” Shaw quips, licking his lips. They’re shiny, coated in your juices. He flashes that gorgeous smile at you.

Figuring that you also weren’t aware based on your lack of response, Shaw stands up, silhouetted by the flashing lights of the screen at the front of the room.

“Think I sufficiently returned the favor, right, love?” he asks, leaning over you. 

Your tongues meet yet again, tasting each other on your lips. As he presses into you further, you notice he’s still hard. You glide your hand over the noticeable bulge, teasing him. He inhales sharply and groans into your mouth, then pulls away.

“Guess you’ve still got another round in you,” you hear yourself say. You immediately feel your face flush, shocking even yourself with your sudden boldness.

“Guess so,” Shaw replies, moving to sit down in the set of recliners to your left. He unbuttons his jeans and pulls them down, his fully-erect cock springing out once again.

“You made a mess of that one, so why don’t we try another seat, yeah?” 

He winks at you, then lifts his hoodie once again to reveal his perfectly sculpted abs. He leans back, his dick resting up against them, enticing you over. You glance around the theater, still somehow empty. You then look back at Shaw, who sits patiently, waiting for your reaction.

The devil that’s still sitting on your shoulder whispers into your ear:  Do it. You’ve already gone this far, what’s a little further ?

You feel a grin forming on your lips as you walk over to Shaw. Pressing against him, you straddle his thighs. You tease his cock with your pussy, your wetness coating him. His breath hitches in anticipation as you hover over him. You slowly lower yourself onto his cock, the delicious feeling of his girth filling you up overcoming all your senses. He stretches your walls and you gasp, never having felt this full before.

At the sound of his moans, the feeling of a dark, sinful, rush flows through your veins. Adrenaline, raw lust and desire are controlling all of your actions. You roll your hips, and he groans louder, placing his hands on them as the dialogue behind you drowns out the sounds of your sins. You bounce up and down, moving to the tempo of a lullaby no one else can hear. He grabs your breasts as you ride him, drawing out a whimper of pleasure.

Shaw thrusts into you, matching your cadence. You lean into him, the two of you pressed together as you fuck without inhibition. The feeling of his cock between your walls is heavenly, and you throw your head back in ecstasy, hair hanging loosely down your back. 

“Hey,” you hear Shaw whisper suddenly, “why don’t we switch it up?” 

The words are breathy, as though it’s hard for him to speak and fuck at the same time.

“What...do you mean?” you answer, confused, though you’re finding it equally as hard to speak coherently.

“Stand up.”

Lifting yourself off of him, you do as he says. You’re in the back of the theater, and if anyone came in just then, they would see your naked behind, save for your t-shirt and bra pushed up as far as possible. 

Shaw remains seated for a few seconds longer. He reaches out behind you and squeezes your supple ass. Your naked, curvy silhouette is framed by the bright lights of the newest science-fiction action movie trailer, and he has never seen anything so sexy before.

Finally, he stands. You watch his movements carefully, your curiosity heightening. Suddenly, he moves behind you, gently pushing his knee between your legs.

“Bend over,” he instructs. 

You obey.

It doesn’t take long to realize what position he wants you in, and his hands reach out to grab your hips as you’re bent over the seat, facing the back of the recliner. You oblige him further by arching your back, deepening the angle for his maximum pleasure.

An initial wave of the fear and paranoia of being caught rolls over you, but you feel it ebb as Shaw begins slamming into you yet again, returning right back to the same rhythm where you had left off in your sinful lullaby. All of your attention is focused on him. His hands rest on your hips, guiding your movement as you push back into him. 

He’s so big, you can feel him filling you all the way. The heightened angle is allowing his cock to go so far, up to where he can reach no further, but thankfully it doesn’t hurt. Instead, you revel in the feeling. You’ve never been fucked by a guy who could slam all the way into you like Shaw does.

His hands grab your ass as you bounce up and down methodically. He moves them back to your hips, guiding them up and down as he thrusts harder and harder into you.

His dick slams into your g-spot repeatedly, and you feel yourself on the verge of shattering once more. Not even seconds later, you hit your climax. The fire pools low in your abdomen. The buildup starts slow as the fire blazes to life, then transforms into a pleasurable inferno, shooting all the way up into your chest.

“Mph!” 

A cry of ecstasy tears from your throat. Riding out the final throes of your orgasm, your pussy walls clench tighter around his dick, causing him to gasp. The sudden tightening, a torturous yet delicious feeling, becomes nearly too much for him to handle, threatening to make him come undone sooner rather than later.

“Shit, I’m gonna…” Shaw rasps, barely finishing his sentence as he, too, cums, spilling into you.

Breathless and panting, you pull yourself off of him and stand up, your legs shaking so much you have to hold on to the seat in front of you to prevent yourself from tumbling onto the floor. Quickly, you reach down and pull on your underwear and shorts, a little bit relieved to be covered up again. Shaw is also breathing hard. He’s grinning at you as he buttons his jeans, then glancing to the seats to your left. There’s a few wet spots on the seat - the glaring evidence of your sin.

“You certainly made a mess, huh, Y/N?” he teases, leaning towards you, amber gaze burning into yours. “And not just the seats.”

Blushing furiously at the double meaning, you look towards the aisle.

“I-I’ll go get some paper towels,” you stammer, suddenly feeling the need for fresh air.

Running to the bathroom to clean yourself up, you return a few minutes later, several paper towels in hand. You wipe down the seat, hands shaking all the while. When you’re done, you ball up the towels in your hand, moving to throw them out. As you turn to leave, Shaw pulls on your arm.

“Hey, wait. The movie’s starting,” he whispers, holding you in his gaze. You turn towards the screen, and, just as Shaw said, the title screen of the movie flashes across. Something else catches your attention, and you look down to find another couple walking into the theater, whispering loudly about how they made it just in time.

You look back over at Shaw, and he flashes you that gorgeous smile, winking at you as you sink down into the seat next to him. He wraps an arm around you and you start suddenly, but sink into him. His touch is surprisingly comfortable.

“That’s definitely the best way to skip the previews,” he laughs, and you feel yourself smile, the devil on your shoulder winking at you and finally disappearing.

[mamaneedsadrank]

2021 =1st Rule of Fight Club

Oh. Hi. Its me. That spiritual blogger that gives you life advice and shit and drinks beer.  Tonight’s a little bit  more special. Do you know why? 

Because I am drinking a 16 OZ can of Keystone instead of 12 oz. Big changes are a happening here people

I craved this bitch today. The Ice Cold Beery goodness just coating my throat with happy bubbles of really weak booze content.

Ladies, Gentlemen, Friends, Family and of course my whole 3 fans. I need to write more. It’s not even a want any more its a need.  Spewing  nonsensical things is fun, and therapeutic.  I think I will do themed weeks. Aw yeah, bring it we are are about to get so weird in here, you better bring your safe words.

Or not, because this blog is written under the influence of my fav blue can. #Keystone why the hell are you not sponsoring me? Who else plugs you as much as I do?

So the Holidays happened. Good, Bad, indifferent they happened for all. I hope they were as wondrous as you reader!

What I can tell you in the last month after being Corntined for 2 weeks, not seeing my friends for months and doing the rinse, lather, repeat thing put me in a zombalicious mode. I think that funk is passing...Again, Key Stone you dirty sexy liar putting beer gogs on.

But no really. There are good things I want to throw at you:

1. Stop parent shaming one another. Everyone is going to do it different, and there is no right or wrong way to eat a Reeses. Remember that before you go judging Karen for coaxing her crying a kid with a toy. All young spawns of homo sapiens are different . They learn different, they like different things, and guess what? That’s okay. Lettuce try to just respect the differences, learn from one another and if there is a disagreement, of parenting styles, put yourself in a damn time out chair for a five, tequila  and some breathing skills.

2. Listen more. We are creatures of wanting to talk about ourselves and throw pieces of our life into the story to be involved, but right meow, plenty of people  need someone to just listen to them.

3. Hugs have healing powers.  Hippie dippity as it sounds, hugging the shit outta your loved ones ( or strangers...whatever you’re into) makes you just feel whole.

4. Cats have really funny butts when they they are shaved after getting fixed.

5. You can’t fix everything. 

6. My oldest seester is lucky she is so artistic, and beautiful because girlfran sucks at pool.

Okay friends, the eyeballs are getting froggy, and I want to play some Tony Hawk before I succumb to slumber.

XOXO

No I am not gossip girl.  However..... Here is Blair And Chuck celebrating that thing we can’t talk about. 

Goodbye for now.

[datingsimreviews]

Hustle Cat

Hustle Cat is a Short but cute dating sim that lets you choose your gender and date either male or female characters!

Beware spoilers incoming!!!

Summary:

So first of all I’d like to say I very much appreciate having a game where you can date girls as a girl. That always makes me happy to see.

Hustle Cat is about a cat café which is actually a coven of witches. The employees are cursed to be cats when they leave the café unless they can figure out their own individual magic. Each route focuses on a character discovering their true selves, a bit of romance with the main character and their chosen partner dating and defeating this rust witch named Natch that’s trying to get the café for himself.

It’s a good game, but it’s very short. Compared to other dating sims I played each path felt kind of rushed, I wanted more information on the characters and more development, but I very much appreciated the fact that there were cute cats and that this was a very pro LGBT game.

Not everything is perfect though. I encountered a lot of bugs while playing which hampered my enjoyment. My game crashed once minimum every route. Luckily they had a great auto save feature so I barely lost any progress but it feels like the auto save feature was there for the crashing. I wish the crashes just didn’t happen. There’s also images in the gallery that are glitched or at least all walkthroughs say you can’t find anything because they’re glitched.

 The protagonist:

Avery is our protagonist and you can choose their skin tone and gender which is fun. You would think that with so many choices this protagonist would be someone you could project on and all. And I’m sure it’s easy for some people to project on Avery but I had a little trouble because I couldn’t change Avery’s name despite the game not being voiced and the fact that Avery’s magical talent is trash. It’s funny to think about but it doesn’t scream epic to me. I like it, a lot of people would have the magical power of “bending trash” but I wish we had seen more of it. Avery’s never able to beat Nacht the rust witch on their own despite their forceful nature. I would have loved to see the power in the player character.

Avery’s fine though.

Landry:

Landry was the first character I romanced, a sweet and sensitive sort of guy who helps you during work. He likes building cat trees which is fun.

Out of all the guys Landry has the most backstory I think or at least, the most “feels complete” backstory. Landry is an Adept so he has innate magical ability that lets him see through glamorous. He saw a kid at a bar once who was a witch and was trying to be invisible and the kid cursed him in to “have his heart explode if he ever lost his temper.” He felt a burning in his heart and ran off and met the owner of the cat café who’s solution to the problem was to double curse him into a cat??? Idk why this guy’s solution to everything is to turn it into a cat.

Landry hates magic because of this so he’s reluctant to learn magic from you. He eventually does and develops powerful lightning magic. He finds the kid and after a fight the two talk it out and kinda become friends? Turns out the kid just cursed him to have heartburn for an hour and he panicked.

He’s pretty strong and I like the side character of the kid in his route. I also like how he and the main heroine love pizza together. His route feels the most complete.

Hayes:

Hayes is the introverted barista character. I always like the shy glasses types so I was really interested in romancing him, and it was nice to see his character type!!! He’s got horrible anxiety which is why he doesn’t really talk to people and enjoys being a cat to de-stress. His anxiety is portrayed as an actual mental disorder instead of just cute shyness and he and the main character learn good coping techniques to help him through it.

His magic is to…Make anything he speaks through Poems happen??? It sounds OP and I’m not quite sure how it works but I would love to see how his magic developed more. He liked writing poems but if he messes his poems up and can’t find a rhyme his body turns into static.

I love that despite his anxiety he loves big romantic gestures. That’s cool.

Finley:

Finley was my favorite character because her interactions and dialogue just felt so organic. Once the main character and her got into a romantic relationship her relationship felt like a real relationship, or at least something I would like to experience. When she thinks that the main character and her might not make it she asks if they live if Avery will cosplay with her.

Finley’s really into video games, and is kinda nerdy. In the other routes she ships the main character and the person they’re pursuing. She’s also just really bubbly.

She’s the social media expert and to get traffic for the café she’s become an internet famous cat because she can control what her internet persona can do to do cat stunts that normally wouldn’t be online. Good for her monetizing that curse for cash.

She can block people in real life or report them, that’s her magic. If someone doesn’t really care about the internet though she has to come up with a phrase that resonates with them in the same way #blocked does.

I also like how at the end of her story she and the main character become vigilante superheroes.

Mason:

Another lady character! And this time she’s the silent and buff type. I loved Mason in the other routes because she was the only one who didn’t learn magic and still stood against Nacht because he never seemed to predict someone would punch him and was just so strong.

She does end up learning magic in her route (fire magic) but I’m not sure why it’s fire. Everyone else had something else that mimicked their personality or what they liked to do besides Landry. Mason’s really into cooking and I thought she’d have cooking magic.

Her route was very sweet and made me cry. It focused on her and her grandpa and how he thinks she’s just a delinquent so they don’t talk anymore so now to spend time with him she’s been visiting him as a cat instead. It was sweet to make them close again. But it was also the route where I realized how short the game was, or just how short it felt.

Mason was sweet and I love the muscle-y lady type but I would have loved more development between her and the main lead. I just wanted a whole lot more.

Reese:

Reese is Graves’s Apprentice and the only one who knows about magic before all this. I always wondered in the other routes why he turned into a cat if the reason they turned into cats was because they weren’t practicing magic.

In his route you learn that despite his boasting he’s not very good at magic because he’s practicing his father’s type of magic- drawing. His father is a designer and loves to draw. Reese’s talents actually have to do with sewing though and he develops sewing magic, which lets him open up portals or enchant clothing.

I wanted to see more of his magic actually happen because I’m still not sure the rules of his sewing magic. But his route was nice. He felt like he played off of Avery’s stubborn personality well.

He’s kind of a tsundere and very full of himself. In the other routes he has a crush on Graves despite knowing him all his life so it’s nice to help him out of that. In his route you barely talk about his crush on Graves and it’s only implied in the other routes. It feels like there should have been more drama concerning the fact that he has a crush on someone else in his own route.

Graves:

The final character is Graves the manager of the cat café and the oldest character (I’m not sure how old but there’s definitely a significant age gap there). He’s the one who cursed everyone into being a cat and the reasons weren’t clear until his route. I was excited to see all the secrets be uncovered like why Nacht is after him and why he doesn’t really teach you anything and why he curses people.

In his route however it feels short and rushed. His and Nacht’s relationship is only implied. It could have possibly been romantic and Nacht was just a jealous ex who turned to hunting people because he was mad??? I’m not sure.

He explains he cursed everyone to be cats because witches can sense magic and they weren’t strong enough to defend themselves so he glamoroued them. And apparently he’s cursed to not talk about magic??? I’m not sure his route just feels so rushed.

He himself isn’t a bad character. He acts very gothic and vampire like when in reality he’s not a vampire or scary he’s just a dorky LARPer. It’s funny. His magic is cat magic so to deal with Nacht he takes Avery’s advice to just curse him into a cat. When his solution to everything before was to turn it into a cat. Should have come up with that yourself buddy.

His route was by far the weakest for me, not only because it felt extremely short and didn’t answer a lot of my questions but also because I couldn’t get into the romance. There’s this line he uses when he learns Avery’s 19 where he’s like “I had no idea, you’re so mature!” which is just a classic…bad line to make people feel like they’re older and get in an age gap relationship.

I feel like he could have been done all right but he didn’t gel with me.

  Overall the game is a good game. Very short but cute especially if you like cats. I really wish there was just…more content in the game though. But it’s very LGBT friendly which definitely is cool!!! I’m always desperate for w/w content in dating sims because it’s rare to come by. So thank you Hustle Cat for that. And I’m sure other people feel represented by it too.

The bugs definitely annoyed me though. Also side note that I realized while writing this review, the gallery is very clunky and not organized by characters. And in a dating sim that’s definitely something that they usually have.

[flamboyantly-incompetent]

Neuron, Ch.8

Bucky x Named (Mutant) Reader

Warnings: awkwardness, mutual pining, angst

Masterlist

Word count: 3,378

Note: Gifs aren’t mine, they will never be mine, I’m not that talented.  This chapter was rough for a number of reasons, so, sorry that there was such a big gap between the last and this.  Band camp and college started, and I’m so very bad at writing awkward things because I have to take cringe breaks... it’s... yeah.

Also - I changed my url, mostly because my roommate said something really funny about a gif and I just had to.  But it does encompass my personality quite well, so, enjoy!

Bucky didn’t know what to do.  He could think of several things he wanted to do.

Run.  Hide.  Jump out a window.  Stare dramatically into your eyes until he turned to stone.  Kiss you back, at least.

You’d kissed him, desperately, and you hadn’t hesitated a bit.  Your hand in his hair, your fingertips on his skin, how gently your body had collided with his, it had all knocked the wind right out of him.  It always came as a surprise how disarming your presence was, and when you appeared that morning you were the literal light at the end of a very unpleasant tunnel.

But he never imagined that you could have feelings for him.

Yeah, he wasn’t the Winter Soldier anymore.  Yeah, feeling had returned to parts of his mind again.  But he still had those nightmares.  He still had to repress the instinct to kill first, assess later.

And, frankly, the threat alone that his mind could still be tapped terrified him.

He was still scared.  He was still broken.

And how was he supposed to tell you that?

His good friend Shuri loved movies, all kinds.  When she wasn’t inventing the world’s next coolest thing or being generally lovely, she was watching a movie.  While Bucky was adjusting in Wakanda out of the deep-freeze, she had a habit of arriving now and then to declare that it was movie night and drag him up to T’Challa’s theater.  She made him watch everything from Sabrina to Remember the Titans to the entire Lord of the Rings franchise. 

Honestly, Bucky loved movies too.  For a long time, it was much safer for him to feel things fully when he was feeling them vicariously, when they weren’t his and he could leave them on the coffee table when he went back to his goats.

He didn’t fight so tooth-and-nail against emotion, not anymore, but he’d seen enough chick flicks to know that if he tried to explain to you that he was simply too broken, that you were simply too good, you’d end up telling him some bullshit about how he was good too.  Which, frankly, he didn’t have the energy for.

That’s why, instead of following through with any of the things he wanted to, Bucky followed you to Strucker’s office silently.

You didn’t know what to do either.  Were you supposed to pretend that didn’t just happen?  Were you supposed to tell... someone?  As you passed the occasional recently liberated mutant, you pretended the floor was captivatingly interesting, hoping no one would notice the odd energy cast around you.

Bucky’s presence was loud in your brain, and you couldn’t say to save your life what he was thinking.  He had been so close to you, waking every sense to high alert.  It had seemed for a moment that he wasn’t completely disgusted by your sudden show of romantic interest, but his current silence suggested otherwise.

A whir and click were followed by a choked growl.  You shot a glance back to him; he was glaring at his prosthetic and pointedly ignoring you.

He had every right to be mad.  And, if you were honest, your timing was shit.

You just hoped you could go back to being friends after this.

When you arrived in Strucker’s office, Steve waved you over to the desk without looking up, frowning in rapt attention by a stack of files he sifted through.

“What’cha got there, Cap?” you asked, doing your best to sound casual.

Steve said nothing, but handed you the top file.

It was yours.

Heart beating quicker by the second, you scanned over the photos and notes of your life through years of surveillance.

“How long were they watching me?” you asked in an almost-whisper.  Bucky gently pulled the file from your shaking hands. 

“Since you worked with us in 2014.  There’s a computer too, but I wouldn’t know where to begin for a password,” said Steve.

Bucky finally spoke, sending goosebumps along your neck, “Why did they wait so long to make a move?”  He started rooting through the drawers until he found what he was looking for - a deep navy tee shirt that he promptly slid over his head.  Well that solved one of your problems.

Steve handed you another file.  On the top was a page that had a date and a single word.

“’June 14 - Nymph’?” Bucky read over your shoulder.  His breath graced your neck.  Jesus, could he not?  “Does that mean anything to you?”

Still staring at the page, you shook your head.

Tony, Peter following at his heels, pushed Strucker through the door.  “Relax, tin man, I’m going,” she grumbled.  You locked eyes for a moment and she smirked, calling a number of unpleasant emotions from your toes.  It took a great deal of concentration for you not to move between her and Bucky.

Steve ignored her completely and addressed Tony, “Civilians?”

“They’re out.  Vision’s contacting local law enforcement now.”

Steve nodded, “Good, then the clock starts now,” he turned to you to explain, “We don’t technically have jurisdiction... anywhere, so we’ll want to be out of their airspace.”

Strucker spoke up, “Are you going to hand me over to the police, then?”

“No,” Steve said, rigid, “You’re going to unlock this computer.”

She shrugged and wriggled out of Tony’s grasp.  Well that was easy.  She clacked on the keyboard, agitated, when you noticed a glimmer of a smirk on her mouth.  Oh, come on.

“Wait,” you said, grabbing her hand.  She hit the enter key with the other.

A staticky voice sounded from the computer over a low beeping, “Unauthorized parties detected in restricted areas A, B, C, and F.  Self destruct systems armed in 3... 2... 1.”

“Well that’s not good,” you remarked quietly.

Steve looked infinitely exasperated as he barked into his comm, “The building’s about to blow, everybody out.”

You turned to Strucker, who looked altogether too pleased with herself, “How do we disarm the system?”

She scoffed, “So you can compromise our operation?  I thought you were supposed to be a smart freak.”  Tony raised his eyebrows.

Agitated, you knew you shouldn’t respond, but you did anyway, “Smart enough to kick your ass, anyway.”

“Oh, please.  Without your mutation, you’re useless.  Admit it, as much as you want to deny it, you love the power it gives you.”

“Not everyone wants to rule the world.”

“You and I both know that what you want has nothing to do with your destiny.  Tyrant.”

Peter cut in, “Um.  Can you guys do this later?”

You said, “Shush,” at the same time Strucker said, “Shut up.”  You stared at each other, absolutely seething for a moment.  She was daring you to do something, to retaliate.  It was tempting.

A low whine preceded a higher, faster beep.  Shit.

Tony hoisted a protesting Strucker over his shoulder and yelled, “Let’s move!’  Bucky looked around, wheels turning.

He punched through the window with his metal hand, and the rest of the group seemed to get the idea.  Peter flung himself out first, followed by Tony.  

The beeping stopped.  Shit.  A deep boom echoed from further in and shook the floor.

You froze.  This building was exploding.  Exploding.

Bucky grabbed you round the waist and pulled you through the window.  You barely noticed when the shock blast hit you mid-air.  You barely noticed a lick of flame stopped by the suit.  You barely noticed when you both hit the ground.

He coughed, “I’m getting the strangest feeling of deja vu.”

You wanted to laugh.  You did.  Instead, you sat up and buried your face in your hands.

“See?  A useless freak,” Strucker spat.

“Could you get her outta here?” Bucky said, offering you a hand up.

Jaw clenched, you took it and said quietly, “Thank you.”

Steve beckoned with a nod of his head, “To the jet.”

Police lights flashed around, the building burned, people were wrapped in security blankets.  You managed to conjure a smile with the image of Sharkbait explaining where his had been and why he would not be using it.

A man with a microphone flanked by another man with a camera barreled up to you.  He said, “This is Ken Walter with channel seven news, we’re standing with some of America’s ‘Avengers’ at what appears to be a former Hydra base where several prisoners of Hydra have just been released.”  The camera panned along your faces, resting on yours.  Ken Walter continued, “We also appear to be standing with the star of the latest viral video.  I’m sure you all remember the internet sensation dubbed Lady Neuron.”  He put the microphone in front of your face.  When he said nothing, he continued, “What are you?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” you asked, exhausted, “I’m a freak.”

“O-kay,” Steve grumbled, pulling you towards the jet.

You nestled yourself into a corner, as far away from Strucker, and Bucky, as you could get for the ride and turned on your cell phone.

You had some twenty unread messages, all from either your mother or your friend Raina.  You opened your friend’s first.

“Hey, have you seen this?”  “Den?”  “Deeeeeennaaaaaa”. “Dude, are you okay?”  “DENNA.  THE INTERNET HAS GIVEN YOU A NICKNAME.”  “Seriously, I just heard about the break in at Labyrinth.  Call me.”  “I’m getting really worried, Den.”  “Your mom doesn’t know where you are either.”  “Call her.”  “Call SOMEBODY”

You groaned and waited for cell service.

At around 7:30 AM New York time, a new message popped up, “Why are you on the Italian news?  With a bunch of superheroes?  At least I know you’re alive...”

You began to tap out a response, when she called you.  Ah, the joys of iMessage.

“Hey, Ra,” you said softly.

“DENNA MY BEST FRIEND REESE,” she screeched, “What the absolute hell?  What’s going on?  Are you okay?  Who are you with?  Have they been feeding you?  Because you look... rough.”

You laughed in spite of yourself, “Take a breath, man.  I’m okay-is.  This is a hella long story, and I’m about to land in New York and still need to call my mother.  Can I call you back?”

“Oh.  Yeah.  Sure, that’s cool.  Listen, it’s really good to hear from you, I was worried.”

“I know, I’m sorry, I’ll explain everything as soon as I can.”

You both said your goodbyes, and you geared yourself up for talking to your mom.

At the Avengers tower, with Strucker and General Marino confined to their respective interrogation rooms, Steve pulled you aside.

“We need to talk.”  Natasha gave you a side eye before fleeing the scene.  You turned to face Steve, remembering your indignation from hours prior.  “That was reckless.”

“Yep.”

“Then why did you do it?  You didn’t just put yourself in danger, you put everyone else in danger, too.”

“We were already in danger.  We didn’t have a better plan.  We weren’t going to come up with a better plan and I was not about to waste time trying while maniacs were torturing people.”

“You still went off on your own, and that can get people killed, like yourself.”

“I’m not a soldier, Steve.  I don’t do exploding buildings, I don’t do hiding in safe houses, I don’t do nothing when I can because someone said so and doesn’t bother to explain why.”  When he didn’t respond, you continued, “I’m sorry that I have been putting your friends in danger.  I’m sorry that I am not perfectly level headed.  They’re my friends now, too.  I’m not sorry that I did and will continue to do all I can to keep them out of danger.”

“That was quite the speech.”  You sighed, exasperated.  He clapped you on the shoulder, “We can agree to disagree for now.”

“What will you do now?” Natasha asked you.

You glanced around a bit before replying, “I need to go home; I doubt they’ll come after me after being on the news.  Think you guys can handle it from here?”  You pretended not to notice Bucky’s expression.

Peter grinned at you, “Hell yeah, we’re Earth’s mightiest heroes!”

“Kid, watch it,” Tony scolded, then he turned to you to shake your hand, “You did pretty okay, Champ, for a civilian.”

You laughed, “You know, Mr. Stark, I’m gonna take that as a compliment.”

You shook Steve’s hand next, then Wanda’s, and continued down the line.  Bucky was last.  He looked tired.

“Mr. Barnes,” you said as you offered him a hand that he took gently, “take care of yourself.”

“Denna,” he started.

You cut him off, wanting to avoid shedding tears by any means, “Don’t go falling off anymore trains?”  He nodded, a melancholy smile playing across his lips.  

As soon as he released you, you thanked everyone and said goodbye one more time, then got the hell out of there.  You may or may not have cried on the way to the airport.

Before you reached it though, you pulled your phone out of your pocket and composed yourself enough to call Raina.

Her voice was agitated, not in a wholly angry way, just, Ra, as she answered with, “Okay friend, it’s time to talk.  All of the internet knows about your mutation now; are you okay?  Why are you with the Avengers?  You got to meet Falcon and didn’t tell me?!”

Grinning through a creek of tears, the sound of her voice came as a relief, “I’m sorry I’ve been AWOL.  I’m on my way home, think you can meet me at my place in a few hours?”

“Ooh, is it a pizza or fro-yo kind of conversation?”

You sniffed, “Dumplings.  Definitely dumplings.”

“Oh boy, this is serious.”

The flight to Pittsburgh was marginally uneventful, but you did catch more than a few passers-by staring at you.

There were reporters waiting for you at your apartment, forcing you to fight and wiggle your way through them to your door.

Finally making it, you couldn’t contain any longer and shouted, “You all are a burden to the economy!” before slamming the door in their faces.

Ra, who had a key to your apartment and was already sat on your couch eating an egg roll, said, “They’ve been here since noon.  I couldn’t get them to leave.”

You shrugged, kicked off your shoes, threw yourself onto the floor and tore into your share of the dumplings.

“So,” Ra continued, “Tell me about your day.”

You filled her in on everything from the moment Steve popped up at your job to the awkward goodbye you’d just had with a certain cyborg.  At the end of your tale, you shoved your face into a throw pillow, and she started laughing.

“Den.  Oh, Den.  Why- I’m sorry, why?”

“I’m going to need you to be more specific.”

“You met a hot old guy.  You realized you’d caught feelings.  Then you saved him from Nazi’s.  Then you kissed him.  And then...  Nothing?”

“What was I supposed to do?  Hash out the details of my feelings in the middle of enemy territory?  With Steve freaking Rogers, who is mad at me, by the way, literally right there?”

“I mean, no, but you couldn’t have found a better moment?”

You lifted your head just long enough to give her a look then plunked it back down.  “He, I mean.  When was I going to have a better moment?  I just kept thinking about how important he became to me, and how he’d been away for a day and I couldn’t deal, and then how that nightmare was almost over, but that meant,” you waved your hands around, “I’d be leaving.  And, yeah, I’m an idiot. But I didn’t want to leave having not kissed him once.”

When she didn’t respond, you looked up to see her grinning with annoying enthusiasm.  

“What?”

“You like him.”

“I thought we’d established that.”

“No, I mean, you actually like him.  Like more than yeah cool let’s get drinks, or I also love board games let’s play Life.”

“Dude, we played so much Life holed up in that house.”  She hit you with a pillow.  “Don’t get too excited, I probably won’t see him again.  Maybe ever.”

“And this makes you feel...?”

“Sad.  Relieved.  Conflicted.  What else is new?”

She sighed and scooted closer to you on the couch, linking your arms together. “Well, at least you can still play Life with me.” 

Bucky had been in a sour mood since you left, and it had been a few days.  It had been a few days of thinking about everything his mind could get a handle on, and it was getting to be more than he could wrestle with.  At the heart of it all, he missed how easily you addressed heavy things, missed you.  And, sure, he knew it was partially his doing, but it still felt wrong somehow.  It didn’t help that his thoughts kept flickering back to wondering what you were doing.

In his and Steve’s apartment, he starfished on the living room floor and stared up at the popcorn ceiling.  Why would anyone make a ceiling popcorned on purpose?

He didn’t even say goodbye properly.  The whole team was there when you left; there was no good way to say what he’d wanted to.  And with Strucker and General Marino in custody, it was unlikely that he’d see you again.

The front door opened and shut.  Shit, he was supposed to be doing the dishes.

“Have you moved at all since I left?” asked Steve, a vein of humor in his voice as set an arm-load of groceries on the counter.

“I fell asleep,” Bucky lied.  He jumped to his feet with a huff.  “Sorry.”

Steve only nodded.

Bucky avoided his gaze and busied himself with the dishes he was supposed to do two hours ago.  If only you’d left him alone with his feelings, he may have been able to stifle them.  But you just had to go kissing him.  He could still feel you, he could still smell you.  And, while it wasn’t exactly fresh like a spring meadow, because apparently prisoners of Hydra don’t get to brush their teeth before an interrogation, it was wholly you.  And then you stopped.  And he was going to kiss you again; he hadn’t thought about it, he decided.  But then Steve had given him a moment to think about it, and he remembered why love was something he’d probably never be able to have.  After, though, when he didn’t and you had to say goodbye, he could feel how heartbroken your pulse was; he could sense it.  Bucky cursed his super soldier senses, accidentally shattering the plate he scrubbed in his hands.

“Hey!  I liked those,” Steve chided.  He paused at Bucky’s frustrated expression.  “Y’okay?”

Bucky worked his jaw a moment, “Yeah.  I’m good.  Just... I’m good.”

Not believing it for a second, as the locker room had surveillance cameras Steve happened to find at a very opportune moment, Steve played along and then sighed dramatically, “Shoot, Tony gave me the repo thing for Denna’s project,” he fished the thumb drive out of his pocket, “I forgot to give it to her.  Maybe I can mail it, I think I still have her address.”

Bucky snatched it out of his hand with a little more force than necessary, “I-I’ll get it to her.”  Maybe if he had a reason to see you he’d have the nerve to apologize.

“Buck, that’s like a six hour drive.”

“This is classified, you can’t mail it.  It’ll help me clear my head, anyway.  I’ll be back.”  As soon as Bucky made it out the door, Steve let a knowing smirk conquer his face.  Ladies and gentlemen, Bucky Barnes was smitten.

The takeout box of pad Thai you were working on was almost gone when there was a soft knocking on your front door.  You groaned, throwing your head back to look at the microwave clock.  It was nearly eight in the evening; there shouldn’t be any reporters lurking about anymore.

You thanked heaven you were still wearing a bra before squinting through the peephole.

James Buchanan Barnes stood outside your door, looking windswept and a bit guilty.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” you said to no one in particular.

[tabloidtoc]

Globe, January 25

You can now buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: COVID patient Larry King’s nasty battle over $50 million will 

Page 2: Up Front & Personal -- Shia LaBeouf shows off his tattooed belly on a walk, Jessica Alba matches her mask to her shoes, Simon Cowell works out as he continues to recover from breaking his back 

Page 3: Amy Schumer on the beach in St. Barts, Peter Weber is a total cue ball, Jenny McCarthy hauls garbage outside her Illinois home 

Page 4: David Bowie’s supermodel widow Iman confesses she gets lonely but will never tie the knot again because the singer was her true love -- she made her revelation in the January issue of a fashion magazine where at age 65 she’s still hot enough to be the cover gal -- David and Iman’s daughter Lexie asked her if she would ever marry again and she said never and that their life together was beautiful and ordinary and that David was a very funny warm gentleman 

* Kindhearted Kelly Ripa is so spooked by her new gruesome true crime series about digging up murder victims’ bodies that she’s having terrifying nightmares that have driven her to a shrink for help -- Kelly and actor husband Mark Consuelos are bigwig producers behind Oxygen channel’s series Exhumed that debuted January 17 featuring unearthed corpses to solve cases -- many nights Kelly will awaken haunted by a case she and Mark reviewed and realizing the horror and heartbreak the victims and their families went through is something you don’t forget once the lights are out -- while Kelly and Mark aren’t on the show as executive producers they have to approve the episodes and become intimately involved with the devastated families who help tell their heartbreaking stories -- her immersion in the grisly material has had a chilling effect on Kelly who is an empath which is a highly sensitive gal who can often feel the pain and suffering others are going through and Kelly’s therapist encourages her to do positive meditations each night before bed and think about at least two things that made her happy that day and Kelly is doing her best to follow doctor’s orders but she is so affected by the plights of other people that somehow the nightmares still manage to find their way into her dreams 

Page 5: Onetime Bond girl Tanya Roberts passed away at age 65 less than 24 hours after her prematurely announced death -- Mike Pingel who was a rep for Tanya says he told the world that she had died at L.A.’s Cedar-Sinai Hospital on January after speaking with her distraught beau Lance O’Brien -- following a goodbye visit with the ailing star mistaken Lance claimed she died in his arms but bizarrely the very next morning sobbing Lance said he was told by the hospital that Tanya was still alive in the ICU while filming a TV interview about her untimely end -- however according to Lance she finally perished hours later on January 4 after being taken off life support -- Tanya reportedly collapsed in her California home after walking her dogs and rushed to the hospital she remained on a ventilator from December 24 until her death which was not COVID related

Page 6: In Denmark a bitter feud between royal wives is tearing the ruling family apart -- Danish Crown Prince Frederik’s Australian wife Mary detests her French-born sister-in-law Marie who is wed to Frederik’s kid brother Joachim and Mary helped banish Marie and Joachim to Paris to get her sophisticated rival out of her hair -- Frederik’s wife who is the future queen desires to be treated with the deference befitting her station even by relatives while Marie is far less stuffy and very outspoken and she’s made it plain she was unhappy when her husband was ordered to become military attache at the Danish Embassy in Paris in 2019 -- shortly after his arrival in France Joachim suffered a blood clot in his brain and when Frederik showed up to visit his ailing brother Mary was nowhere in sight

Page 7: After failing to land plum roles in A-list movie blockbusters Meghan Markle and her husband Prince Harry inked a $40 million deal to crank out podcasts and the first installment was branded a bomb after airing late last month -- despite superstar Elton John dropping by for Archewell Audio’s first holiday special the highly hyped recording embarrassingly landed at No. 17 on the Spotify podcast list behind entries like Deep Sleep Sounds which features whale sounds -- many in the royal inner circle are gloating and smirking over the arrogant couple’s disastrous debut and even with Elton’s help Meghan is still a second banana to whale noises and no one wants to listen to the couple’s self-absorbed drivel 

* Not only has royal renegade Prince Harry traded London for L.A. he’s ditched posh palace pronunciations and speaks more like an American during his public appearances -- while doing his first Archewell Audio broadcast Harry dropped the refined Received Pronunciation favored by his grandmother Queen Elizabeth and sounded like a regular American 

Page 8: Anti-vaccine crusader Bobby Kennedy Jr. has been kicked in the teeth by his powerful political clan after triggering fears about immunizations and the desperately needed cure for COVID-19 -- brother Joe, sister Kathleen and niece Kerry Kennedy Meltzer who is a doctor battling the virus on the frontlines publicly accuse Bobby of putting Americans’ lives at risk by telling lies about vaccines in general and attacking injections aimed at stamping out the killer virus -- family members were always skeptical about Bobby’s slightly off-kilter anti-vax ideas but they supported him because the Kennedys stick together and hate to show a rift in the family but now they have shifted against him

Page 10: Garth Brooks’ sloppy habits during nine months of lockdown have iron-willed wife Trisha Yearwood in a tizzy and their marriage is dangling by a thread after she clobbered the slob with a strict set of house rules -- after exasperated Trisha spilled her guts to pals a friend advised she put the rules in writing and hang it where he’ll see it and she did but Trish’s demanding ways are pushing Garth to the brink and he’s ready to walk unless they can find middle ground, one that doesn’t include Trisha calling all the shots -- Trisha has given Garth a list of do’s and don’ts that include wearing deodorant at all times and stop leaving the bathroom a mess and to remove his clothes from the dryer once he’s done but on the top of Trisha’s list is a ban on Garth’s constant 24/7 whistling that has her pulling her hair out 

Page 11: Dynamic diva Jennifer Lopez is bored with fat-cat fiance Alex Rodriguez and is struggling to keep their romance alive -- after postponing their marriage and saying there was no real reason to tie the knot Jennifer has kind of hit a wall with where she and Alex can really take things and she is particularly frustrated by ho-hum Alex’s lack of motivation -- those who know J.Lo want her to stick to her wheelhouse by making movies and recording music however those endeavors don’t offer retired baseball player A-Rod any position to play -- they haven’t fallen out of love exactly but they have run out of the joint projects and goals that were the rocket fuel for their relationship and they’re stuck with no obvious places to go next 

* Teresa Giudice and new beau Luis “Louie” Ruelas are already shacking up together and plan to buy a pad of their own and Teresa can see herself marrying Louie and combining his kids and hers under one roof -- he stays over most weekends and some weeknights at her place in New Jersey and they cook Italian together and stay up late watching movies -- her four daughters like Louie too and see how happy he’s made her 

Page 12: Celebrity Buzz -- Maitland Ward wearing masks on her breasts (picture), Demi Lovato battled a life-threatening secret eating disorder for years but today she bravely flaunts the stretched skin she’d once considered painfully flawed by wearing glitter paint on her stretch marks to celebrate her body and all of its features whether society views them as good or bad, Paul McCartney still gabs with dead pal George Harrison whose sprightly spirit has planted itself in a tree, Ray Liotta has asked girlfriend Jacy Nittolo to marry him and she screamed yes, legendary country star Ricky Skaggs is lucky to be alive thanks to an emergency quadruple bypass that saved his ticking time bomb of a ticker 

Page 13: Mel Gibson steps out in Malibu with his arm in a sling (picture), Amy Poehler loads up at a Beverly Hills market (picture), brothers and Kinks bandmates Ray Davies and Dave Davies brew up an outing in London (picture), Michael Jackson’s one-time associate billionaire biz-wiz Ron Burkle snagged the late pop star’s beloved Neverland Ranch for the bargain basement price of $22 million 

Page 14: Bryan Dattilo the 47-year-old soap star who’s played Lucas Horton on Days of Our Lives since 1993 now calls himself grandpa to a bouncing baby boy thanks to his 21-year-old son Gabe and his girlfriend and he’s also becoming a granddad on TV too with Alison Sweeney who plays Sami Brady, no more boozy days or nights for Chrissy Teigen and she declares she’s on the wagon and through with imbibing embarrassments

* Fashion Verdict -- Reese Witherspoon 7/10, Greta Gerwig 1/10 

Page 16: Cover -- As 87-year-old Larry King battled for his life against killer COVID in an L.A. hospital his estranged wife Shawn was making a grab for the talk star’s $50 million fortune -- the cheating blonde is raging because in the months before his hospitalization Larry filed for divorce and cut her out of his will, leaving the fortune to their boys Chance and Cannon and Larry Jr. his son from his second marriage -- it’s going to be a fight to the finish literally and Shawn is trying to make sure she’s not left out when it comes to his cash 

Page 19: 10 Things You Don’t Know About Anthony Anderson

* Kim Cattrall swore off motherhood because bedroom sessions with then-husband Mark Levinson didn’t fit into her Sex and the City shooting schedule -- Kim was 41 and newly wed when she decided to slam the door on pregnancy 

* Bill Cosby is refusing to shower with other inmates a Pennsylvania prison to avoid contracting COVID-19 and he says he controls his stink by washing up in his cell’s sink but he doesn’t expect the situation to last forever because he’s hoping a court will toss his 2018 conviction 

Page 21: LeAnn Rimes has admitted she checked into a mental ward after feeling bullied when news leaked she had cheated on her husband with married Eddie Cibrian -- she reveals she did 30 days in therapy in 2012 because she couldn’t handle the public shaming that rained down on her over her affair with future husband Eddie who was still married to Brandi Glanville and she was still wed to Dean Sheremet -- LeAnn calls her therapy the best gift she could have given herself 

Page 22: True Crime -- Survivor villain Jonny Fairplay is living up to his bad boy image after cops busted TV’s evil liar accusing him of ripping off his dementia-stricken granny 

Page 24: Marie Bobette Riales knows where the bodies are buried in actor Danny Masterson’s Scientology rape scandal and terrified church leaders want her silenced at all costs but Marie who dated the indicted actor and slapped the sci-fi faith with a civil suit won’t back down -- Marie’s impending testimony at Masterson’s criminal trial and in her civil case threatens to destroy the controversial church by exposing the intimidation used by ruthless Scientology bigwigs to hide the twisted secrets of its celebrity members 

Page 26: Health Report 

Page 30: Tom Cruise has taken on the mission to shield his movie crew from the rampaging coronavirus by building a disease-proof studio on a former top-secret army base -- Tom who is already taking heat for screaming curses at crew members who ignored virus safety measures is shelling out millions to build a secure shooting facility at the former English tank base in Longcross -- Tom is obsessed with finding ways to beat the fast-spreading virus ever since filming of Mission: Impossible 7 was shut down when the pandemic savaged Italy and when it spread to Britain 

* Alec Baldwin’s yoga guru wife Hillary a.k.a. Hilaria Baldwin has been busted as a fraud after putting on foreign airs and talking with a Spanish accent -- the mom of Alec’s five young kids claimed to be from the Spanish isle of Mallorca where she was called Hilaria but her tale unraveled after a social media video showed her accent mysteriously drifting on and off and pals from Boston’s preppie Cambridge School of Weston began texting that she’s all-American with one saying her name was indeed Hillary Hayward-Thomas and she did not have a Spanish accent -- now Mrs. Baldwin is confessing she was born in Boston but spent a lot of time in Mallorca where her American parents called her Hilaria and she picked up the accent 

Page 36: Angelina Jolie is panicking over her sky-high legal bills but she only has herself and her vengeful divorce war against ex Brad Pitt to blame -- she may be worth $100 million and rake in moolah from producing and directing but her high-maintenance lifestyle and refusal to finally settle her four-year divorce and custody war with Brad have left her cash-strapped and she’s starting to panic over her dwindling cash flow and every time she files a motion like her losing attempt to dismiss the judge it costs her money because these fancy lawyers can charge more than $850 an hour and it adds up -- more and more Angie’s having to dip into her savings but as much as it hurts she’s stubborn and refuses to settle and she blames Brad for everything -- on top of legal bills the luxury lifestyle she shares with her brood including a whopping $17.5 million mortgage on her L.A. mansion are a humongous cash drain and she also supports a household staff plus she’s never learned to say no when one of the kids wants an expensive high-tech toy 

* Pop diva Taylor Swift’s image has been erased from a mural at Nashville’s iconic Legends Corner bar because some die-hard fans believe she turned her back on country music -- artist Tim Davis notes the saloon’s owners told him to replace Taylor with Brad Paisley -- furious Taylor fans cry that she won country’s highest honor the Pinnacle Award in 2013 but painter Davis notes Taylor has turned to pop and some inebriated bar hoppers have spit on her image specifically feeling betrayed by her venture from country 

Page 40: Arnold Schwarzenegger’s acting unstoppable and savoring his favorite stogies just three months after major heart surgery but a medical expert warns the 73-year-old’s love for cigars could trigger a devastating health catastrophe and he should kick the habit -- however Arnold who had an aortic valve replaced in October has been feeling his oats with galpal Heather Milligan in resort Sun Valley, Idaho 

* In the latest twist in Dr. Dre’s messy billion-dollar divorce the rap mogul admits he spent a night of passion with estranged wife Nicole Young after they split -- in legal documents the music tycoon claims that although Nicole moved out of their family home in mid-March the two continued to speak and socialize and see each other and he also revealed that on the couple’s May wedding anniversary Nicole invited him to dinner at her Malibu home and the two did the horizontal mambo -- Dre vehemently denies Nicole’s claim that he abused her during their 24-year marriage adding she was not and is not afraid of him and insists she’s lying to bolster her divorce claims

Page 45: Robin Williams’ wife Susan Schneider insists she’s haunted by his ghost who shows up when she needs him and she says she recently saw him in the yard 

* Gilligan’s Island’s goody-goody girl Dawn Wells took a shameful regret to the grave that the perky pothead was accused of being a dope dealer -- the 82-year-old actress best known as girl-next-door Mary Ann Summers on the classic sitcom was still humiliated over her secret stoner past when she died of complications from COVID-19 -- her drug scandals dated back to 1998 when her friend and co-star Bob Denver who played Gilligan was arrested after a parcel containing half an ounce of pot was delivered to his house in Princeton in West Virginia and Denver later fingered Dawn as his connection and said she’d been selling him dope since 1995 but Dawn lawyered up and denied everything and was never charged -- she was busted for having marijuana in her car as she drove home from her 69th birthday party in 2007 and she was sentenced to five days in jail and fined and placed on probation -- her years as a pothead continued to haunt her until the end 

Page 47: Bizarre But True 

[thethirdwheel404]

Med Rewatch Series (#13)

S3 E13: Best Laid Plans.

Episode description: When a mother makes a decision regarding care of her vegetative adult son, Dr. Manning and Dr. Halstead and find themselves at odds.

Literally when do they not.

I am watching this while doing a voice call with a friend, so we’ll see how distracted I get.

I am literally so tired.

Let’s get into it

- connor only now noticing ava doing something she has apparently been doing forever. boy get some eyes

- her talking to patients while under anesthesia is just, so endearing. so soft.

- this is another example of ava’s ‘high risk high reward’ idea. riskier procedure for better quality of life

- sarah is so pure

- ava wearing her lab coat and gloves will never not be sexy

- ava feeling bad that connor’s patient has very little hope

- sarah’s little ‘hmm, the plot thickens’. A dork.

- me, breathless, seeing ava with her lab coat sleeves rolled up: she is very pretty

- oh yeah, they fight over the heart

- noah gets shit on so much this season

- this sarah’s dad storyline goes so hard. it’s so tense, so well done

- why does connor always look like that. so agressive. always

- the noah story in this ep is actually really funny

- HOLY SHIT SURPRISE ANGRY AVA

- I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT

- fantastic

- god just look how mad she is. that is fantastic, she is f u m i n g

- and she has reason to be too, he went behind her back to support his patient (which, like yeah it’s smart, but too fucking smarmy)

- fuck connor. honestly. man needs to get stuffed

- ava watching karma bite the bitch boy in the ass

- she literally stands there, watching him flounder. power move

- ‘you can’t compare patients in need. that’s why there’s a list’ she is a logical person. she also follows the rules, she’s fair, and gets mad when everyone around her doesn’t (and commits malpractice)

- ava being shook when connor says ‘yeah, it’s all about the numbers’,  condescendingly.

- this is the point where all the ava haters latched on to, bc out of context this makes her look heartless. looking at the numbers and not the patient. the point is that this is incredibly hypocritical, bc ava and connor both have attachments to their patients, and connor is implying that ava has no heart, just bc she isn’t giving in a giving him what he wants? when she is just??? also caring for her patient?

- come on man. it’s so annoying. ava is seen as heartless for not caring about her patient. real classic.

- here, ava’s face, in the canon of the show, she’s reevaluating herself so that she fits the show’s standard. (emotional to the point of being idiotic, and giving connor everything he wants. like every other character)

- however, i like to think that this is her realizing (bc it is a face of realization) just how hypocritical connor is being. and how much he sucks. she realizes his flaws

- connor looking ava dead in the eyes (no emotion, btw) and saying ‘I had the lab run it twice’

- straight people are so dumb

- this is the guy you choose?

- ava’s little floundering when she turns to goodwin after connor’s patient recovers enough for the transplant. it is fantastic. i love it so much. it makes my heart go brring

- LIKE IT IS SO ADORABLE. oh wow.

- i cannot emphasize enough

- like she is at such a loss! she looks so lost! so defeated!

- (this is a really good ep for emotional ava)

- ava really calls him out: “save your self-righteous hero speech for someone else” she sees through his bullshit.

- as she walks away you can see her bring her hand to her face--- wiping tears? pressing fingers to bridge of her nose?

- he doesn’t even feel bad

- i want to write something for this episode so bad. just. something. comforting ava. she deserves someone looking out for her. just... i want to fix this ep bc its so sad

- yeah, also, think about this: connor was her only friend, and she just got completely ostracized by him

- a lot of her work conflict comes from him! and she’s her only friend! she is not doing well! someone help her (me. through reese)

- STOP MAKING AVA OVERLY SYMPATHIZE WITH HIM

- LITERALLY SHE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CALLS HIM OUT ON HIS SHIT. DO NOT MAKE HER AGREE WITH HIM

- stop this

- HOLY SHIT SARAH’S CASUAL CLOTHES. wowie

- stop making her do bad things

- sarah’s dad has the same cups as the hospital. conspiracy

- rip off steve jobs

- YES SARAH DON’T SIGN IT

- ethan’s sister is adorable. her introduction is adorable. noah flirting with her is adorable

- i actually really like ethan’s sister.

- april being like ‘aw she seems fun’ is adorable

- ethan being embarrased is so in character and also such an older brother thing to do

- ethan being a distant older brother was one of the best things they did for his character

-  brian tee is fantastic

Okay, cool. So this episode is great if you want to see Ava actually being stressed, and showcasing emotion, which I know you do. And yeah, we’ve established that she really does feel emotion (contrary to the writers’ opinion), but here we get to really see what she’s like when she’s frustrated, when she’s at a loss. That little bit of grasping at straws she does when Goodwin lets Connor’s patient have the rights is probably one of my favorite little Ava moments.

thanks for staying with it

[tessavirtueandmoir]

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

Daniel aka one of the Finnish guys cause I didn’t want to get lost in the club (I also hate club so it was like a double whammy)

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

Is outgoingly shy a thing? I used to be super shy and still am around guys, but im definitely more outgoing in everyday life than I used to be

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

MY BESTFRIEND WHO FREAKING FLEW TO ENGLAND THE DAY I CAME HOME AND I HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO SEE HER YET.

4. Are you easy to get along with?

Depends on who you ask, I guess.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

More likely than not.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

Blond hair, blue eyes… the eye colour doesnt really matter tbh but that seems to be the trend. Not douchey.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

Uhh.. that’s wishful thinking.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

Those dang Finnish boys #lifecrisis

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Yes.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Probs one of those Finnish boys

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

I sent an article to my mom about how Canada was gonna be colder than Antarctica and mars. lmao I love this freaking country.

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

Freedom 90 - Pitch Perfect Cast

Saturday Night - Whigfield

New Year’s Day - TSwift

New Rules - Dua Lipa

Hopeless Romantic - Scott Middough

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

Yeah dude point me to a girl who doesn’t

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

Lmao no not really

15. What good thing happened this summer?

I turned 20 and apparently had a life resolution. Ditch those crappy people y’all, they aint worth your time

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Debatable…

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

Don’t even remember who my first crush was so that’s probably a no.

19. Do you like bubble baths?

Yo. My kryptonite. My res only had showers for the 4 months I was there and I legit cried when I say my bathtub so.

20. Do you like your neighbors?

As long as I can’t hear them, I don’t really care

21. What are you bad habits?

Getting super snippy when I’m hungry. Um… constantly being on my phone? Idk what else. Being blunt?

22. Where would you like to travel?

I just want to go back to England at this point

23. Do you have trust issues?

hahahah AHAHAHAHAHHA bye

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

the fact I didnt wake up until like mid afternoon in the uk… now literally nothing

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

My stomach? Or maybe my arms

26. What do you do when you wake up?

Check my phone notifs

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

Maybe a tad darker because im literally pale af but otherwise no

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

my best friends aka girls

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

No? One of my ex’s once told one of my friends to check on me though cause he was worried.. it was strange.

30. Do you ever want to get married?

Also, debatable. I’m loving my alone life right now.

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

If it wasn’t I would literally cry so. Every time I get it cut we make sure it goes into a pony because of dance and stuff.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

Anna Kendrick and is Tessa Virtue a celebrity? I think she is. Wow… that is quite the threesome honestly. Gotta have different life experiences I suppose.

33. Spell your name with your chin.

grasysdoihj

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

Dance and soccer. dance is a sport dont argue with me

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

TV I guess. But either option would be pretty lame.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

In my 20 years, yeah probably

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

Nothing, I usually check my phone or something

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

Not an inconsiderate douchebag. And someone that lives in the same country as me.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

NEWLOOK, River Island, ASOS, RW and Co, Dynamite (sometimes the Bay)

40. What do you want to do after high school?

Be a lawyer.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

Nah man.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

I’m fucking mad and u best walk away before I slit you in half. Or I’m tired. Or im not comfortable with the situation

43. Do you smile at strangers?

I barely even look up so no

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

Bottom of the ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

That maybe it’ll be cold enough for me to take a bath at some point… I have a lame Canadian life. And I also don’t wanna be a university drop out so there’s also that.

46. What are you paranoid about?

People following me… like not on social media. Just like in general

47. Have you ever been high?

Nope

48. Have you ever been drunk?

Potentially? Idk man, probably not

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

Oh yeah. But I told my friends about it so does that really count?

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Navy

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

Everyone wishes they were T Virtue so.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

I wish I could make myself want to go to the gym an exercise. But yet, here I am

53. Favourite makeup brand?

Anastasia Beverley Hills/Tarte/Fenty Beauty

54. Favourite store?

Did I not already answer this?

55. Favourite blog?

Mine. Shameless self promo

https://graysonwadsworth2.wixsite.com/hayitsgray

56. Favourite colour?

Grey/Teal/Burgundy

57. Favourite food?

G A R L I C B R E A D

58. Last thing you ate?

I’m about to eat a huge ass bowl of oatmeal

59. First thing you ate this morning?

This huge ass bowl of oatmeal. It’s 9:25 PM in case y’all were wondering.

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

Many. For dance.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

No, I’m an angel. Just kidding.

62. Been arrested? For what?

Nope.

63. Ever been in love?

Yep.

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

Happened on a cruise ship in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea and I stupidly decided to play a game where we were trying to get our faces as close as possible without kissing… I was dumb okay lmao.

65. Are you hungry right now?

Mildly.

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

I talk to my Tumblr friends more than my real friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

Twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Why is instagram not a choice. Tumblr I guess.

69. Are you watching tv right now?

I’m watching the movie what not to expect when you’re expecting

70. Names of your bestfriends?

Harneet, Keira, Emmy, Katerina, Andy, Meghan x 2, Madi, Sydney, Emily, Lauren, Cassidy… wow… that’s so many

71. Craving something? What?

Not to be sick.

72. What colour are your towels?

My personal towels are teal. But we have brown, black. and grey ones in the bathroom too.

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

there’s 6 on my bed right now

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

does one laying at the foot of the bed count cause otherwise no

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

I legitimately cleaned out my entire closet this week and found my ENTIRE collection of webkinz so if we’re gonna count those probs like 300 lmao

75. Favourite animal?

Elephant

76. What colour is your underwear?

Pink

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

Vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

Cookie Dough OR French crisp from Laura Secord

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Grey

80. What colour pants?

Grey, white and pink

81. Favourite tv show?

GREYS ANATOMY

82. Favourite movie?

Moulin Rouge or Angels and Demons

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Mean girls who are you

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

Jump Street

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

Janice

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

Dory or Crush

87. First person you talked to today?

I honestly have no idea, probably meg though… or I definitely snapchatted people

88. Last person you talked to today?

Meg

89. Name a person you hate?

Well, that would be mean.

90. Name a person you love?

My British bestie, honestly, I don’t know why I love her so much. It’s strange. My cat is the next backup.

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

No? Violence is never the answer. Passive aggressiveness is

92. In a fight with someone?

Not that I know of

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

All of my sweats are basically roots, and I honestly have too many

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

TOO MANY

95. Last movie you watched?

Pitch Perfect 2

96. Favourite actress?

Anna Kendrick OR Reese Witherspoon

97. Favourite actor?

I am currently blanking on male actors at the moment. Let’s just go with Ryan Reynolds cause he’s funny af and married to Blake so

98. Do you tan a lot?

I burn a lot.

99. Have any pets?

A really bitchy cat

100. How are you feeling?

Sick #iloveairplanes

101. Do you type fast?

Yes, unnaturally fast. I can also type without looking at the keys which weirds a lot of people out.

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

Doesn’t everyone? It wasn’t stuff that I did myself though

103. Can you spell well?

Usually yes, lately no. I need to go back to school obviously

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

My grandma

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

Yep

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

Accidentally on purpose yes

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Yes, and I got bucked off and now refuse to ride another horse

108. What should you be doing?

Writing an essay that’s due on Friday

109. Is something irritating you right now?

The fact that I can’t fall asleep, but that’s the norm so

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

Only when they broke my heartttttt

111. Do you have trust issues?

I swear to god I’ve already answered this one

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

My best british friend. She legit left me crying in the middle of the club

113. What was your childhood nickname?

Gray gray. Or Gray goose.

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

Yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

I used to. My console is in my closet now though

116. Are you listening to music right now?

Yes, always.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

MA FAVE. It’s the only soup I eat.

118. Do you like Chinese food?

YES. MY OTHER FAVE.

119. Favourite book?

13 Reasons Why, or Atonement. Soon to be: Scrappy Little Nobody

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

No.

121. Are you mean?

I am blunt. Sometimes those two can get confused

122. Is cheating ever okay?

No, y’all are scum bye

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

Uh… if my white shoes get dirty I clean them so they’re white again

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, but I believe in crushes at first sight #themodel

125. Do you believe in true love?

I mean.. maybe.

126. Are you currently bored?

Yes, hence why I’m answering all these questions

127. What makes you happy?

My friends

128. Would you change your name?

I currently am, but not my first name.

129. What your zodiac sign?

Cancer the crabbbbbb

130. Do you like subway?

Uh…. sometimes. But it’s not my go to

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Yikes, this has legit happened to me and I had to dip so fast im not even lying

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Definitely one of those Finnish boys

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

Take back your picture in a frame

OR

sometimes the clothes do not make the man

134. Can you count to one million?

Who would ever try that? It would take forever.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

When I told all my profs I couldn’t write my midterm cause I had a concussion and I went to the Dominican instead #rebel

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Closed

137. How tall are you?

5′ 3″

138. Curly or Straight hair?

Straight hair that is curled

139. Brunette or Blonde?

Blonde

140. Summer or Winter?

Neither, I hate both. But if I had to choose, summer

141. Night or Day?

Night

142. Favourite month?

May

143. Are you a vegetarian?

No, I’d literally die because I hate vegetables

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

T E A

146. Was today a good day?

Tbh I laid in bed all day so that’s pretty ideal

147. Mars or Snickers?

Mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind - Dr. Suess (how philosophical wow)

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

Nope

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

The young team were still getting most of their ice time in Ilderton and were preparing for the Western Ontario sectionals in the juvenile category, but in late autumn of 1998, just a week before sectionals, Scott broke his right arm playing flag football. That is the longest sentence ever wow.

[wardans]

It's Tag Time!

Rules: Tag people you want to know more about!

Tagged by: @aspiring-to-be-a-cat thanks babe ( ˘ ³˘) im so sorry this took so long orz

Were you named after anyone?

Well, i was named after some french actress named Anouk Aimee. The name is very popular in the Netherlands but not so much Canada 😢

When was the last time you cried?

Yesterday actually. I was sitting outside (bad idea it was hella cold) talking on the phone when i started talking about atlantic cod and i dont remember what the joke was but it was so funny i made myself cry from laughing too much

Do you like your handwriting?

Hmm it's ok i think.. Its gotten neater over the last few years so thats good. And it's readable so bonus points ✌Dont even get me started on cursive tho... I learned it maybe 2x a week for a month in gr4 and then it was taken out of the curriculum so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

What’s your favorite lunch meat?

HAAAAAAAAAAAAMM !!!!!!!!! Im just a sliced ham sorta gal

Do you have kids?

Well i certainly hope not! ;D nah im barely an adult anyways. But kids love me for some reason tho

If you were a different person, would you be friends with you?

Idk tbh. I would hope so. If we were i would pray to literally anything that other me could cook so they could teach me their ways. My family? Great cooks, etc. Me? Not so much. Anyways we would both enjoy memes and singing to disney movies and mamma mia and dreaming of sleeping forever (and riding the bull ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

Do you use sarcasm?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Do you still have your tonsils?

Indeed

Would you bungee jump?

See i think it would be cool but i wouldnt actually go through with it. Unless i was blindfolded. Blindfolded means i cant see myself fall to my death

What’s your favorite cereal?

I just eat cheerios with raspberries;; although when i was younger my mum would occasionally buy Reese's Pieces I think which werent so bad

Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

Sometimes yes sometimes no

Do you think you are a strong person?

Surprisingly yea actually. Listen i lifted my friend one (1) time who weighs like 230+.

What’s your favorite ice cream?

I just had it like 5 minutes ago. Berry sorbet!!! I also really like lime. Sorbet icecream is my saviour ty.

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Hmm something that sticks out. It always depends on the person really. Some people i dont notice anything. But like one friend, something i always noticed was her eyes (the prettiest ever) or her smile! Or my mum has got her big german nose which is hard to miss. I just realized that i love peoples noses cause they can be so different and unique i love it. One friends nose literally reminds of Sera's it's adorable

What’s your least favorite physical thing about yourself?

.... My eyebrows... Like they go from dark to light but it's so abrupt that it just looks like half is shaved off TT-TT so makeup it is and oh it does wonders. Oh and probably my hands... theyre so small, theyre like tiny sausages i hate it and my feet are super small.. like size 4.5 or 5 if im lucky

What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now?

Im wearing grey track pants that i totally didnt steal from my friendo and Iron Bull shirt ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) (thanks bioware)

What are you listening to right now?

...... What is Love by Haddaway

If you were a crayon, what color would you be?

Black, like my soul

Favorite smell?

Hmm, melted cheese.... And when the Khans (family friends) make Biryani or Samosas or Tandoori or Curry they are the best smells ever..! Hm the cold crisp air and pine trees in winter as well!

Who was the last person you talked on the phone with?

My friend actually! (sorry mum)

Favorite sport to watch?

Haha sports? What sports? Ok i have watched football (european) with my family. Europeans are crazy about football my god. I was there during the world cup and oh dear when the Netherlands lost....

Hair color?

Well naturally im blonde but i dyed it red violet last december which is essentially hot pink but with more purple in the mix but then i tried this lighter almost pastel pink. Idk if i should go back to blonde or do something else tho :0

Eye color?

Blue like my mamas

Do you wear contacts?

Nah just glasses when i remember to :D

Favorite food?

I had mac n makhani last night and idek what it is but it was good so yea that. And lasagna. What can i say i really like cheese. Oh ooh and butter chicken! And this pulled pork poutine i got from a Jamaican restaurant one time.... It was so good....

Scary movie or comedy?

I hate scary movies. When i first watched Jaws when i was 13/14 i had nightmares for months. So comedy. There was a comedy/horror that i loved tho; Tucker and Dale: Forces of Evil or something like that.

Last movie you watched?

I wanna say Thor: Ragnorak (so good) but it was actually Moana (again for the 100th time)

What color shirt are you wearing?

It's grey with one of Bulls tarots on it (blessed). Its got a little bit of paint on it tho :'(

Summer or winter?

Winter. Oh, worm? Although i love spring because it rains so much hell yesss

Hugs or kisses?

I deprived myself of affection for years, thanks! depression! So now i make up for it hugging all the people i care about. Occasionally i'll give friends smooches on the cheeks if theyre comfortable with it too

Book you’re currently reading?

Haha whats reading? I havent read anything in forever. Im still trying to finish The Danish Girl, The Outlander series, The Serpent of Essex and The Girl of Fire and Thorns which I got like 6 years ago at a scholastic book fair

Who do you miss right now?

My mum and my cat and my friends and family T-T and Asra & Nadia & Oleg & Parthurnaax pls let them be safe and happy and basically ever vg character that i love ;u;

What’s on your mouse pad?

Ive never used one of those ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ but my german oma and opa got me one a long time ago with some famous german mouse thing on it. Kinda cute kinda not

What’s the last TV program you watched?

This tv show called Blackish was just on tv. It's hella funny omg. Also i turn on American Dad just for backround noise if that counts

What’s the best sound?

That music that plays when Asra is around, like in that cave.. It just sounds so magical ;u;

Rolling Stones or The Beatles?

Well i did just go to a Beatles Tribute concert 2 weeks ago sooo.. The Beatles it is 👍

What’s the furthest you ever traveled?

Austria cause for some reason we stopped there when going to visit family but it's farther than the Netherlands so like... what...?

Do you have a special talent?

Drawing I guess. Being outta school and barely drawing sort of took me outta the loop... now everyhing i draw looks ugly :/ I guess my hidden talent of writing for one ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿ I learned to make coffees i didnt even know existed at work as well so?? Yes?

Where were you born?

Toronto actually :/ I was almost born somewhere else because my parents travelled a lot up until i was born but they came back... Goddamn

I tag: @queenlydweeb @ridethefrostback @mrjennety @backwardszombie ;D

[evancarmichael]

✎ Glennon Doyle's Top 10 Rules for Success. She suffered from bulimia, alcoholism, and drugs for 20 years. She's the founder of Momastery, an online community reaching millions of people each week. She's also a bestselling author, speaker, activist, and the founder of Together Rising. She's Glennon Doyle and here's my take on her Top 10 Rules for Success! ★★★ #GIRLBOSS WOMEN LEADERS ★★★ Get a FREE video every morning from a successful woman leader for the next 254 days. Find out here: http://bit.ly/2DUuyP7 ★★★ SECRET BONUS VIDEOS ★★★ What is the One Word that is most important to Tony Robbins, Gary Vaynerchuk, will.i.am, Oprah Winfrey, and Howard Schultz? Find out here: http://bit.ly/2yEDhU2 What are the success rules from Steve Jobs, Jeff Bezos, Kanye West, Tony Robbins, and Elon Musk that had the biggest personal impact on me? Find out here: http://bit.ly/2jYuliC 📜 GLENNON DOYLE'S RULES 📜 1. Allow pain to become your power 2. Don't be a perfectionist 3. Live your truth 4. Grow through adversity 5. Be consistent 6. Get rid of shame 7. Be a love warrior 8. Figure out your routine 9. Embrace life 10. Show up! 11. BONUS - Be open ✈ THREE-POINT LANDING QUESTIONS ✈ 1. how can you turn your pain into power? 2. where do you need to stop being a perfectionist? 3. where do you need to get rid of shame? ✎ More about Glennon Doyle. She completed her Bachelor of Arts degree at James Madison University in 1998 and became a teacher. Her online writing career began in 2009, with the creation of her blog, Momastery. The funny, conversational and tell-all nature of her writing quickly gained popularity. She has written books including Love Warrior and Carry On, Warrior. She's the founder and president of Together Rising, a nonprofit for women and children in crisis. Two of her books have been named as New York Times bestsellers. She has also become a professional public speaker. ★ RECOMMENDED VIDEOS FOR YOU ★ If you liked this video, you'll love these ones: • “You HAVE to Make a CHOICE: Am I Going to SHOW UP?” - Brené Brown - https://youtu.be/mDS5bqvOlhc • "STEP Into the ARENA!" - Brené Brown - https://youtu.be/BfwWhi0VjCY • Les Brown's Top 10 Rules For Success - https://youtu.be/5zEJGsvXhxg ★ GET THE 3 POINT LANDING JOURNAL★ Your powerful companion to go from just watching another video to actually taking action in your life. https://amzn.to/2Xl3LSR ❤ HELP TRANSLATE THIS VIDEO ❤ If you loved this video, help people in other countries enjoy it too by making captions for it. Spread the love and impact. https://www.youtube.com/timedtext_video?v=gzeJFV8FTMI ✔ SOURCES ✔ https://youtu.be/BpBnGHjda14 OWN https://youtu.be/PHiuQLs7kgU Chase Jarvis https://youtu.be/J4JOr_eRb1o Reese Witherspoon x Hello Sunshine https://youtu.be/Rj64DTUsV5g Marie Forleo https://youtu.be/gu9YTJdjrys Best Self Magazine https://youtu.be/mBwWQRPIda0 KARE 11 https://youtu.be/zviyr8lVhTw Glennon Doyle Top 10 theme song by Leer Jerra: https://leerjetta.com/ ♛ BUY MY BOOKS, CHANGE YOUR LIFE ♛ Some used the ideas in these books to build multi-billion-dollar businesses. I'll give you the simple-yet-powerful formula that they used (and you can) to realize your dreams. Get yours. http://bit.ly/2auuYKa http://bit.ly/2DWNJZU ✉ JOIN MY #BELIEVE NEWSLETTER ✉ This is the best way to have entrepreneur gold delivered to your inbox, and to be inspired, encouraged and supported in your business. Join #BelieveNation and feel the love. http://bit.ly/1DyhRRs ⚑ SUBSCRIBE TO MY CHANNEL ⚑ If you want to do great things you need to have a great environment. Create one by subbing and watching daily. http://www.youtube.com/subscription_center?add_user=Modelingthemasters ¿ COMMON QUESTIONS ¿ • What is #BTA?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsY8bmTUVP8 • How do I get one of Evan's t-shirts?: http://bit.ly/2RhaVs1 • Why does Evan look like Nicolas Cage?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZHRniTcRwo • Why does Evan make so many videos? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEKxGA8xr1k • How do I vote for the next Top 10 video Evan should make? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0arZb0xLIDM • How do I vote for the next #7Ways video Evan should make? https://youtu.be/sXgcP79xrNQ ツ CONNECT WITH ME ツ Leave a comment on this video and it'll get a response. Or you can connect with me on different social platforms too: • Instagram: http://bit.ly/2Gw539O • Twitter: https://twitter.com/evancarmichael • Facebook: http://bit.ly/1t8ruBM • Website: http://bit.ly/LfsMJ5 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you for watching - I really appreciate it :) Cheers, Evan #Believe

[maealbert]

Get To Know Me More!

These are just some random questions I found from a website! Feel free to copy and paste and your own answers!! To my followers, here's some more things you can get to know about me!!

Favorite fast food restaurant? TACO BELL

Favorite ice cream flavor? Strawberry, Moose Tracks, French Vanilla

Favorite chocolate candy? M&Ms, Ferrero Rocher (not sure I spelt that correctly)

Favorite fruity candy? Jolly Ranchers or cherry lollipops

Favorite flavor Starburst? PINK or red Favorite dish at Olive Garden? THEIR SALAD IS THE BOMB! But I love their chicken parmesean (spelling?)

Favorite kind of sushi? I'm the type who does not like sushi at all.

Favorite Asian dish? If it involves rice, bean sprouts, steak, and veggies I will love it.

Favorite Italian dish? Uh, pizza duh. NO. My boyfriend's mother makes such good food! (perks of dating an italian family)

Favorite food of all time? My grandmother Portuguese Soup recipe.

Favorite way to cook a steak? Medium and juicy.

Favorite pasta dish? Chicken Alfredo

Favorite cookie? Chocolate chip, helloooooo. All Girl Scout cookies!

Favorite fast food French fries? WENDY'S!!

Favorite cereal? Fruit Loops, Reese's Puffs, Captain Crunch

Favorite breakfast food? PANKCAKES or waffles

Favorite pizza toppings? This is a lot, here we go. Pepperoni, cheese, onions, green peppers, sausage, Canadian bacon, chicken, banana peppers

Favorite fruit? STRAWBERRIES or cherries

Favorite vegetable? Any color bell peppers, onions, RAW broccoli, green beans, peas, carrots

Favorite dessert? Cheesecake or ice cream (both are so good fried 😍)

Favorite comfort food? Lime tortilla chips, ramen noodles, pickles

Favorite way to eat bacon? Crispy Favorite thing at a buffet? Mashed potatoes

Favorite pumpkin-flavored treat? Pumpkin pie and pumpkin butter

Favorite dish at Thanksgiving? Stuffing for sure

Favorite cake? Vanilla

Favorite ice cream sundae toppings? Sprinkles, cherries, and chocolate syrup

Favorite thing to cook? Pasta and veggie

Favorite soda? Root beer! 

Favorite alcoholic drink? Not legal yet so nothing

Favorite drink at Starbucks? Caffe Mocha

Favorite flavor coffee? French vanilla, caffe mocha

Favorite 80's movie? THE GOONIES or The Breakfast Club

Favorite Harry Potter movie? Half Blood Prince

Favorite Hobbit from the Lord of the Rings? They're all so cute I can't pick one!

Favorite Simpson's character? Bart Favorite cartoon cat? Garfield duh 😂

Favorite TV sitcom? FRIENDS

Favorite cartoon? RUGRATS or Hey Arnold!

Favorite scary movie? Scream 1,2,3,4 (even though they aren't really scary 😂)

Favorite funny movie? Good Burger

Favorite celebrity? Paget Brewster, Gal Gadot

Favorite South Park character? Kenny

Favorite chick flick? The Notebook (sorry not sorry)

Favorite Pixar movie? THE INCREDIBLES or TOY STORY!

Favorite Family Guy character? Don't have a favorite

Favorite Leonardo Dicaprio movie? Titanic or Inception

Favorite actress over 50? MERYL STREEP

Favorite Marvel movie? Spiderman 😍 

Favorite TV show? Criminal Minds, Supergirl, The Vampire Diaries, Ridiculous

Favorite cancelled TV series? Grandfathered (so not fair 😩)

Favorite show on the Discovery Channel? I don't watch this channel much...

Favorite classic movie? Chitty Chitty Bang Bang 😍😍 

Favorite Beatles song? Hey Jude, All You Need Is Love, Come Together, Let It Be

Favorite string instrument? Guitar

Favorite instrument? Trumpet

Favorite band or music artist? Twenty One Pilots, Justin Bieber, The Beatles, Nancy Sinatra, Frank Sinatra, James Bay (birthday twin, AYYYYE!)

Favorite music genre? Christian, Country, Indie, Pop, (open to others)

Favorite style of dance? Waltz Favorite boy band? N*SYNC!! 😍😍 

Favorite disco song? Can't choose a favorite

Favorite 80's song? Everyone Wants To Rule The World - Tears for Fear & Jesse's Girl - Rick Springfield

Favorite cover song? Dream - Priscilla Ahm (covered by Selena Gomez)

Favorite one-hit wonder? I don't have one

Favorite song you're embarrassed to like? Overboard - Justin Bieber

Favorite foreign band/artist? - John Lennon

Favorite state you’ve visited? Kentucky

Favorite country you want to visit? Portugal

Favorite thing about America? Scenery 

Favorite kind of vacation? Road trip 

Favorite car? Chevy Suburban, Range Rover, Jeep

Favorite road to drive on? Backroads

Favorite way to travel? By car

Favorite beach? Lake Logan's beach

Favorite place to go with family? Amish Country

Favorite vacation you’ve taken? Family vacation to Put-In-Bay

Favorite fictional place you’d want to visit? GENOVIA

Favorite ride at a carnival? Zero gravity

Favorite thing to do at the beach? Find seashells

Favorite rollercoaster? The Beast at King's Island

Favorite theme park? Not sure

Favorite thing about traveling? Seeing new places and meeting new people, learning new things

Favorite dinosaur? T-rex

Favorite breed of dog? Bernese Mountain Dog and Husky

Favorite season? SPRING! It's just pretty!

Favorite flower? DAISY or Lily

Favorite animal at the zoo? Polar Bear, Elephant, Koala Bear

Favorite type of bear? Polar bear

Favorite natural disaster? What kind of question is this? 

Favorite reptile? Snake

Favorite animal? Elephant

Favorite bird? Cardinal or Blue Jay

Favorite thing in the sky? Sun

Favorite thing about a rainy day? The sound of the rain

Favorite sea creature? Sea turtle or manatee

Favorite color rose? Red or white

Favorite small mammal? Chipmunks

Favorite big cat? Lion

Favorite thing about spring? The beautiful flowers and trees

Favorite wild animal you’d like as a pet? Monkey

Favorite sport? Hockey and volleyball

Favorite extreme sport you're too scared to do? BMX

Favorite Olympic sport? Hockey, volleyball, gymnastics

Favorite football team? College: Ohio State University NFL: Cleveland Browns, Dallas Cowboys

Favorite basketball team? College: Ohio State NBA: Cleveland Cavaliers

Favorite hockey team? Columbus Blue Jackets, Toronto Maple Leafs, Nashville Predators

Favorite baseball team? Cleveland Indians 

Favorite sport to play? Volleyball

Favorite winter sport? Hockey

Favorite sport you wish you were a pro at? Volleyball

Favorite professional athlete? Zach Werenski

Favorite sport to watch in person? Hockey

Favorite nursery rhyme? Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Favorite childhood memory? Christmas with my grandparents

Favorite board game? Aggravation 

Favorite children’s show? Blue's Clues 

Favorite toy as a child? Barbie Doll

Favorite teacher? My 1st grade teacher, Mrs. Geilings

Favorite thing about school? Class trips

Favorite age? 4 

Favorite Christmas present? My first digital Nikon camera

Favorite Dr. Seuss book? Green Eggs & Ham, Cat In The Hat

Favorite Halloween costume you've worn? Princess Anna from Frozen]

Favorite lunchbox snack? Pudding

Favorite Winnie the Pooh character? Roo or Piglet

Favorite thing to do during recess? Playground or tetherball 

Favorite superhero? SUPERMAN 

Favorite video game? Left 4 Dead 1,2 

Favorite color Power Ranger? Yellow

Favorite fairy tale? Cinderella 

Favorite game to play outside? Hide-n-seek

Favorite department store? Maurice's

Favorite place to shop? Rue 21

Favorite store in the mall? Forever 21

Favorite perfume/cologne? White Diamonds by Elizabeth Taylor or A Thousand Wishes from Bath & Body Works

Favorite hair color? Brown or black

Favorite makeup you can't live without? Mascara 

Favorite shoes? Booties

Favorite occasion to dress up for? Weddings

Favorite hairstyle? French braids

Favorite outfit you have? Floral dress

Favorite soap scent? Coconut

Favorite article of clothing? Leggings 

Favorite place for a piercing? Ears

Favorite piece of jewelry? Rings

Favorite thing to wear to bed? Tank top and shorts

Favorite luxury brand? Not a clue 

Favorite brand of toilet paper? Charmin Ultra

Favorite candle scent? A Thousand Wishes or Vanilla

Favorite extracurricular activity? Science Olympiad

Favorite day of the week? Thursday 

Favorite holiday? Christmas or Easter 

Favorite website? Smile More Store

Favorite way to communicate? Text or email

Favorite Youtube video? All of Roman Atwood's videos

Favorite kind of house? Two floors

Favorite car color? White or black

Favorite baby boy name? Joseph or Alexander

Favorite baby girl name? Ruth or Lillian

Favorite thing to do when you’re sick? Binge tv shows or movies on Netflix

Favorite person you’ve never met? Gal Gadot, Paget Brewster

Favorite question you’ve answered so far? Favorite season]

Favorite thing you’ve done in the last 24 hours? Babysittig kiddos

Favorite place to meet up with friends? Parks

Favorite hobby? Writing and photography

Favorite way to cheer you up? Say you bet you can make me smile

Favorite thing to look forward to? The birth of my first kid

Favorite kind of gift to receive? Candy or succulents

Favorite crafty thing to make? Bracelets

Favorite way to relax? Listen to music while I calm myself

Want to know more? Just drop a question in my ask box! :)

[aboutbigbooks]

Ten new releases

Thanks to NetGalley, I’ve been getting advance reader’s copies of new books in return for honest reviews. There aren’t any big books in this crop (Ill Will comes close), but there’s probably something for everyone. And now, in chronological order, some offerings from the first half of 2017. . .

The Dry (Jane Harper, Flatiron, 336 pp., January 10). 4/5 stars. Returning to his small Australian hometown for the funeral of his childhood friend Luke, Melbourne cop Aaron Falk is convinced by Luke’s parents to take a closer look at the circumstances of his death. Doing so revives his and Luke’s shared past. That past involves a dead girl, and the town hasn’t forgotten. To make matters worse, a drought has everyone on edge. Falk has to negotiate their hostility and secrecy to shine a light into some dark places. A well-paced murder mystery in an unusual setting, with good writing. Reese Witherspoon has optioned it for a movie, and I hope that the movie lives up to the book’s cinematic quality.

Read if: You like who-done-its and police procedurals.

The River at Night (Erica Ferencik, Gallery/Scout Press, 304 pp., January 10). 3.5/5 stars. Four friends (is that a thing? seems like it's usually four friends) go river rafting off the grid in Maine. From the beginning, it's clear that things are not going to go smoothly. The guide is sketchy, they aren't experienced rafters, and one of them is an ER nurse, which is never a good sign in this set-up. This was a decent airplane read, if one-note (ominous from beginning to end.)

Read if:  You enjoyed the 1994 movie The River Wild.

The Impossible Fortress (Jason Rekulak, Simon & Schuster, 304 pp., February 7). 4/5 stars. Billy and his friends are coming of age in 1987, and they come up against, get mired in, or are individually able to resist sex, crime, and the Commodore 64. Light and funny – I read this after reading The Vorrh (Brian Catling), which was really weird and dark, and The Impossible Fortress was a perfect palate cleanser.  

Read if:  You want a mash-up of Stand by Me and Microserfs.

The Futures (Anna Pitoniak, Lee Boudreaux Books, 320 pp., January 17). 3 or 4/5 stars, depending on how you feel about things and maybe how old you are. Around the time I graduated from college, I was telling my hairdresser about how great the movie St. Elmo's Fire was. She basically said, of course you like it - it's about your life right now. I think I feel about The Futures the way she did about SEF. The narrative alternates between the perspectives of Evan and Julia, who are living together in New York after graduation, and also skips backward and forward in time. Julia is really the center of the story and seemed better developed as a character than Evan. As in SEF, there are several men, including Evan, in her life, and drama naturally ensues. Although the book was well written, I think it would have been more compelling without the asynchrony in the telling. Disclosure: For me, The Futures suffered by comparison with A Little Life, which also told the story of college friends in their post-graduate lives in New York. If you haven't read A Little Life, then (1) you might like The Futures more, and (2) WHY HAVE YOU NOT READ A LITTLE LIFE YET?

Read if:  You want the literary companion to St. Elmo's Fire.

Ill Will (Dan Chaon, Ballantine, 480 pp., March 7). 3/5 stars. Dustin Tillman is a therapist, a widower, a father, and the childhood survivor of a mysterious mass murder that was attributed to his foster brother. When his client Aqil – a cop on leave with a strong tendency toward conspiracy theories – gets Tillman questioning his past as well as recent events, things start to fall apart. Told from the perspectives of the various men (Tillman, his son, his foster brother), this book had an appealing premise but the overly introspective characters were ultimately unlikeable.

Read if:  You liked his previous books? You have a lot of time on your hands? Try The Dry first.

The Rules Do Not Apply (Ariel Levy, Random House, 224 pp., March 14). 5/5 stars. “I had been so lucky. So little had truly gone wrong for me before that night on the bathroom floor.” This memoir of how Levy builds a life and eventually a family, loses it, and survives is a deeper, albeit implicit, commentary on feminism and happiness than the explicit, sociological book The H-Spot (see below). Love and loss is a common trope, but Levy’s description of her grief is special and at the same time universal. “Grief is a world,” she writes, “you walk through skinned, unshelled.”

Read if:  You liked Cheryl Strayed’s Wild.

A Criminal Defense (William Myers, Jr., Thomas & Mercer, 382 pp., April 1). 4.5/5 stars. Got this one through an Amazon Kindle special, and I had to include it in this list even though it wasn’t a reader’s copy per se. Myers’s first book is told from the perspective of criminal defense lawyer and former prosecutor Mick McFarland, whose plans to mount the defense case of his life are subverted by the fact that everyone is keeping secrets from him. A great, fast-paced read. Looking forward to the next one, due out in 2018.

Read if:  You like Scott Turow’s novels and you don’t mind a change of venue from Chicago to Philadelphia.

The Dinner Party (Joshua Ferris, Little Brown, 256 pp., May 2).3 to 5/5 stars depending on the story. I keep wanting to recreate the magic of Then We Came to the End (2007), so I read this collection even though I’m not a short story person. Other reviewers I’ve heard (including Ferris himself) have basically characterized the protagonists of these stories as a (mostly male) bunch of assholes. It’s true that you wouldn’t want to spend too much time with them, so maybe the short story format is good for that. I personally found them more poignant than some others did. Sure, some were straight-up assholes, but others struck me as just wanting something they couldn’t have, in a childish kind of way: a perfect day, a married coworker. “More Abandon, or What Ever Happened to Joe Pope?” was the tragicomic best of the bunch.

Read if:  You’re a short story person and you can suffer fools.

Ginny Moon (Benjamin Ludwig, Park Row, 368 pp., May 2). 4.5/5 stars. Ginny Moon is 13 years old and autistic. She has a new foster family, a history no one understands that she can’t explain, and a quirky means of meting out justice, including duct-taping your drugs to Maine coon cats, flushing your socks down the toilet, and pooping on your rug (hiding some of the poop in the heat register for good measure). Told from Ginny’s first-person perspective, this is a unique novel that is funny, scary, and ultimately satisfying.

Read if: You’re interested in the inner workings of an autistic mind, you like unreliable narrators, and/or you’re a human being.

The H Spot (Jill Filipovic, Nation, 336 pp., May 2). 3/5 stars. I was looking forward to this release after reading Filipovic’s opinion piece for the New York Times, Why Men Want to Marry Melanias and Raise Ivankas. The premise of the book is fascinating: What would a world designed around women’s happiness look like? Unfortunately, the book is more of a catalog of the things that make women (and also a lot of men) unhappy. There were some moments that felt new and important (e.g., discussion of the new “wellness” dietary rules for women), but also a sense of missed opportunity. What would the world look like if men and women switched places? Would pregnancy be a pre-existing condition? Would men change their names when they married? How would the workplace change?

 Read if:  You can’t get a copy of Naomi Wolf’s The Beauty Myth. Eat a doughnut while you’re at it.

[auroratigress]

Tagged by @margaretophelia Thank you! 1. Always post these rules!
2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you.
3. Write 11 questions of your own. 
4. Tag 11 people. 1. Are you going to any concerts this year? If so, who? IRON MAIDEN AND GHOST FOR MY BDAY!!!!!!!!!!! Also hoping to see Lady Gaga and Lee Aaron. And the bf wants to see Tool. 2. N*sync or BSB? Backstreet's Back ALRIGHT!! (Recently watched This is the End) 3. Favorite word? "Ameezing!" (currently) 4. What was the first CD you ever bought with your own money? Probably Ray of Light by Madonna 5. Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera or Mandy Moore? It's Britney, Bitch. 6. What is your most prized possession? My musical instruments, some autographed memorabilia and some sentimental family things. 7. Do you have any talents? I'd like to think I can sing and I'm okay at sewing. People say I'm funny. 8. Coffee or tea (or caffeine in general)? All rarities. 9. Do you collect any sort of thing[s]? Vinyl records, tiger stuffies or toys, rubber duckies, kitschy chachkies, Halloween crapola. 10. Favorite dessert item[s]? I recently discovered these insanely ameezing red velvet cookies from Thrifty's. My bf got me into this sea salt and caramel ice cream that he loves. Also this local place that does these Reese's Pieces blizzard type things. I love just about anything red velvet or Reese's. 11. Do you have any siblings? If so, do you get along with them? Only child. Questions I ask: 1. What do you like on your pizza? 2. Most visited app/site on your phone/device? 3. A singer who brings you to tears by the mere sound of their voice? 4. Do you prefer a colder or warmer climate? 5. Humid or dry? 6. Pet of choice? 7. Glossy or matte? 8. Favorite types of vids to binge on on YouTube? 9. Favorite Spice Girl? 10. Favorite musical? 11. Favorite Pixar movie? I tag: @margaretophelia (I know you tagged me, but I want to see your answers, lol) @mrrightandmrbubble @fictional-sailor @fieldsong @camillyoee @megbo @katsinova @theruinedpariah @jackiefoxxx @l3etterdayz @callsignaleph

[ncmagroup]

  by Jamie Moses

  For years, media outlets desperately chased the clicks promised by Facebook; now the social media giant threatens to destroy them

As with any toxic relationship, the possibility of a breakup sparks feelings of terror — and maybe a little bit of a relief.

That’s the spot that Facebook has put the news business in. Last month, the social media behemoth announced it would once again alter its News Feed algorithm to show users even more posts from their friends and family, and a lot fewer from media outlets.

The move isn’t all that surprising. Ever since the 2016 election, Facebook’s been under siege for creating a habitat where fake news stories flourished. Their executives were dragged before Congress last year to testify about how they sold ads to Russians who wanted to influence the U.S. election, and so, in some ways, it’s simply easier to get out of the news business altogether.

But for the many news outlets that have come to rely on Facebook funneling readers to their sites, the impact of a separation sounds catastrophic.

“The End of the Social News Era?” a New York Times headline asked. “Facebook is breaking up with news,” an ad for the new BuzzFeed app proclaimed.

When a giant like Facebook takes a step — until recently, the social media site had been sending more traffic to news outlets than Google — the resulting quake can cause an entire industry to crumble.

Consumers, meanwhile, have grimaced as their favorite media outlets have stooped to sensational headlines to lure Facebook’s web traffic. They’ve become disillusioned by the flood of hoaxes and conspiracy theories that have run rampant on the site.

A Knight Foundation/Gallup poll released last month revealed that only a third of Americans had a positive view of the media. About 57 percent said that websites or apps using algorithms to determine which news stories readers see was a major problem for democracy. Two-thirds believed the media being “dramatic or too sensational in order to attract more readers or viewers” was a major problem.

Now, sites that rely on Facebook’s algorithm have watched the floor drop out from under them when the algorithm is changed — all while Facebook has gobbled up chunks of print advertising revenue.

It’s all landed media outlets in a hell of a quandary: It sure seems like Facebook is killing journalism. But can journalism survive without it?

“Traffic is such a drug right now,” says Sean Robinson, a 53-year-old investigative reporter at the Tacoma News Tribune. “The industry is hurting so bad that it’s really hard to detox.”

YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT

It’s perhaps the perfect summation of the internet age: a website that started because a college kid wanted to rank which co-eds were hotter became a global goliath powerful enough to influence the fate of the news industry itself.

When Facebook first launched its “News Feed” in 2006, it ironically didn’t have anything to do with news. At least, not how we think of it. This was the website that still posted a little broken-heart icon when you changed your status from “In a Relationship” to “Single.”

The News Feed was intended to be a list of personalized updates from your friends. When Facebook was talking about “news stories,” it meant, in the words of Facebook’s announcement, like “when Mark adds Britney Spears to his Favorites or when your crush is single again.”

But in 2009, Facebook introduced its iconic “like” button. Soon, instead of showing posts in chronological order, the News Feed began showing you the popular posts first.

And that made all the difference.

Facebook didn’t invent going viral — grandmas with AOL accounts were forwarding funny emails and chain letters when Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg was still in grade school — but its algorithm amplified it. Well-liked posts soared. Unpopular posts simply went unseen.

Google had an algorithm too. So did YouTube.

Journalists were given a new directive: If you wanted readers to see your stories, you had to play by the algorithm’s rules. Faceless, mystery formulas had replaced the stodgy newspaper editor as the gatekeeper of information.

So when the McClatchy Company — a chain that owns 31 daily papers including the Tacoma News Tribune and the Bellingham Herald — launched its reinvention strategy last year, knowing how to get Facebook traffic was central.

“Facebook has allowed us to get our journalism out to hundreds of millions more people than it would have otherwise,” says McClatchy’s Vice President of News Tim Grieve, a fast-talking former Politico editor. “It has forced us, and all publishers, to sharpen our game to make sure we’re writing stories that connect with people.”

With digital ad rates tied to web traffic, the incentives in the modern media landscape could be especially perverse: Write short, write lots. Pluck heartstrings or stoke fury.

In short, be more like Upworthy.com. A site filled with multi-sentence emotion-baiting headlines, Upworthy begged you to click by promising that you would be shocked, outraged or inspired — but not telling you why. (One example: “His first 4 sentences are interesting. The 5th blew my mind. And made me a little sick.”)

By November of 2013, Upworthy was pulling in 88 million unique visitors a month. With Facebook’s help, the formula spread.

The McClatchy-owned Bellingham Herald headlined a short crime story about the arrest of a carjacker this way: “Four people, two cars, one gun. What happens next?”

A short Herald story asking for tips about a recent spree of indecent exposure was headlined, “She was looking at her phone, but the man wanted her to watch him masturbate.”

Even magazines like Time and Newsweek — storied publications that sent photojournalists to war zones — began pumping out articles like, “Does Reese Witherspoon Have 3 Legs on Vanity Fair’s Cover?” and “Trump’s Hair Loss Drug Causes Erectile Dysfunction.”

Newsweek’s publisher went beyond clickbait; the magazine was actually buying traffic through pirated video sites, allegedly engaging in ad fraud.

On Monday this week, Newsweek senior writer Matthew Cooper resigned in disgust after several Newsweek editors and reporters who’d written about the publisher’s series of scandals were fired. He heaped contempt on an organization that had installed editors who “recklessly sought clicks at the expense of accuracy, retweets over fairness” and left him “despondent not only for Newsweek but for the other publications that don’t heed the lessons of this publication’s fall.”

Mathew Ingram, who covers digital media for Columbia Journalism Review, says such tactics might increase traffic for a while. But readers hate it. Sleazy tabloid shortcuts gives you a sleazy tabloid reputation.

“Short-term you can make a certain amount of money,” Ingram says. “Long-term you’re basically setting fire to your brand.”

One strategy throughout the industry is to downplay the location of a story: readers in other markets are more likely to click if they don’t know it happened thousands of miles away.

Robinson, the veteran Tacoma News Tribune reporter, says local cops have complained about crime stories from elsewhere that were being shared on Facebook by local TV stations without context — worrying local readers were being misled into thinking they happened in Tacoma.

Grieve, the McClatchy executive, says that he doesn’t ever want to sensationalize a story. But he also says that “internet and social media are noisy places,” and papers have to sell their stories aggressively to be heard over the din.

“If you’re writing stories that aren’t getting read,” Grieve says, “you’re not a journalist — you’re keeping a journal.”

CLICKBAIT AND SWITCH

Plenty of media outlets have tried to build their business on the foundation of the News Feed algorithm. But they quickly got a nasty surprise: That foundation can collapse in an instant.

As Facebook’s News Feed became choked with links to Upworthy and its horde of imitators, the social network declared war on clickbait. It tweaked its algorithms, which proved catastrophic for Upworthy.

“It keeps changing,” Ingram says, “Even if the algorithm was bad in some way, at least if it’s predictable, you could adapt.”

A 2014 Time magazine story estimated that two to three global algorithm tweaks on Facebook were happening every week.

Six years ago, for example, KHQ, a TV news station in Spokane, Washington, told readers they’d have “an ENTIRE day here on FB dedicated to positive local news” if the post got liked 500 times. It worked. The post got more than 1,200 likes, and KHQ followed through a with a puppy-picture-laden “Feel Good Friday!!!”

Under the current Facebook algorithm, that tactic could get their entire page demoted. So could using shameless “you-won’t-believe-what-happened-next” style phrases.

Much of the time, Facebook and Google don’t announce their shifts up front. Media outlets often have had to reverse-engineer the changes, before issuing new commands to their troops in the field.

“Oh, they changed their algorithm again?” Robinson says. “Oh, what is it today, coach? OK, it’s 50-word [headlines] instead of 60?”

A pattern emerged. Step 1: Media outlets reinvent themselves for Facebook. Step 2: Facebook makes that reinvention obsolete.

Big publishers leaped at the chance to publish “Instant Articles” directly on Facebook, only to find that the algorithm soon charged, rewarding videos more than posts and rendering Instant Articles largely obsolete. So publishers like Mic.com, Mashable, and Vice News “pivoted to video,” laying off dozens of journalists in the process.

“Then Facebook said they weren’t as interested in video anymore,” Ingram says. “Classic bait and switch.”

Which brings us to the latest string of announcements: The News Feed, Zuckerberg announced last month, had skewed too far in the direction of social video posts from national media pages and too far away from personal posts from friends and family.

They were getting back to their roots.

And now, news organizations who’d dumped a lot of money into the eye-catching pre-recorded video would suffer the most under the latest algorithm changes, Facebook’s News Feed VP Adam Mosseri told TechCrunch last month, because “video is such a passive experience.”

Even before the announcement, news sites had seen their articles get fewer and fewer hits from Facebook. Last year, Google once again became the biggest referrer of news traffic as Facebook referrals decreased. Many sites published tutorials pleading with their readers to manually change their Facebook settings to guarantee the site’s appearance in their news feeds.

“Some media outlets saw their [Facebook] traffic decline by as much as 30 to 40 percent,” Ingram says. “Everybody knew something was happening, but we didn’t know what.”

It might be easy to mock those who chased the algorithm from one trend to another with little to show for it. But the reality, Ingram says, is that many of them didn’t really have a choice.

“You pretty much have to do something with Facebook,” Ingram says. “You have to. It’s like gravity. You can’t avoid it.”

Zuckerberg’s comments that stories that sparked “meaningful social interactions” would do the best on Facebook caused some to scoff.

“For Facebook, it’s bad if you read or watch content without reacting to it on Facebook. Let that sink in for a moment,” tech journalist Joshua Topolsky wrote at The Outline. “This notion is so corrupt it’s almost comical.”

In subsequent announcements, Facebook gave nervous local news outlets some better news: They’d rank local community news outlets higher in the feed than national ones. They were also launching an experiment for a new section called “Today In,” focusing on local news and announcements, beta-testing the concept in cities like Olympia.

But in early tests, the site seemed to have trouble determining what’s local.

Seattle Times’ reporter Joe O’Sullivan noted on Twitter that of the five stories featured in a screenshot of Facebook’s Olympia test, “NONE OF THEM ARE OLYMPIA STORIES. ZERO.”

The Seattle Times and other outlets say they’re taking a “wait-and-see” approach to the latest algorithm, analyzing how the impact shakes out before making changes. They’ve learned to not get excited.

“It just, more and more, seems like Facebook and news are not super compatible,” says Shan Wang, staff writer at Harvard University’s Nieman Journalism Lab.

At least not for real news. For fake news, Facebook’s been a perfect match.

FAKING IT

There was a time Facebook was positively smug about their impact on the world. After all, they’d seen their platform fan the flames of popular uprisings during the Arab Spring in places like Tunisia, Iran, and Egypt.

“By giving people the power to share, we are starting to see people make their voices heard on a different scale from what has historically been possible,”  Zuckerberg bragged in a 2012 letter to investors under the header, “we hope to change how people relate to their governments and social institutions.”

And Facebook certainly has — though not the way it intended.

A BuzzFeed investigation before the 2016 presidential election found that “fake news” stories on Facebook, hoaxes or hyperpartisan falsehoods actually performed better on Facebook than stories from major trusted outlets like the New York Times.

That, experts speculated, is another reason why Facebook, despite its massive profits, might be pulling back from its focus on news.

“As unprecedented numbers of people channel their political energy through this medium, it’s being used in unforeseen ways with societal repercussions that were never anticipated,” writes Samidh Chakrabarti, Facebook’s product manager for civic engagement, in a recent blog post.

The exposure was widespread. A Dartmouth study found about a fourth of Americans visited at least one fake-news website — and Facebook was the primary vector of misinformation. While researchers didn’t find fake news swung the election — though about 80,000 votes in three states is a pretty small margin to swing — the effect has endured.

Donald Trump has played a role. He snatched away the term used to describe hoax websites and wielded it as a blunderbuss against the press, blasting away at any negative reporting as “fake news.”

By last May, a Harvard-Harris poll found that almost two-thirds of voters believed that mainstream news outlets were full of fake news stories.

The danger of fake news, after all, wasn’t just that we’d be tricked with bogus claims. It was that we’d be pummeled with so many different contradictory stories, with so many different angles, the task of trying to sort truth from fiction just becomes exhausting.

So you choose your own truth. Or Facebook’s algorithm chooses it for you.

Every time you like a comment, chat or click on Facebook, the site uses that to figure out what you actually want to see: It inflates your own bubble, protecting you from facts or opinions you might disagree with.

And when it does expose you to views from the other side, it’s most likely going to be the worst examples, the trolls eager to make people mad online, or the infuriating op-ed that all your friends are sharing.

That’s partly why many of the 3,000 Facebook ads that Russian trolls bought to influence the election weren’t aimed at promoting Trump directly. They were aimed at inflaming division in American life by focusing on such issues as race and religion.

Facebook has tried to address the fake news problem — hiring fact checkers to examine stories, slapping “disputed” tags on suspect claims, putting counterpoints in related article boxes — but with mixed results.

The recent Knight Foundation/Gallup poll, meanwhile, found that those surveyed believed that the broader array of news sources actually made it harder to stay well-informed.

And those who grew up soaking in the brine of social media aren’t necessarily better at sorting truth from fiction. Far from it.

“Overall, young people’s ability to reason about the information on the internet can be summed up in one word: bleak,” Stanford researchers concluded in a 2016 study of over 7,800 students. More than 80 percent of middle schoolers surveyed didn’t know the difference between sponsored content and a news article.

It’s why like groups like Media Literacy Now have successfully pushed legislatures in states like Washington to put media literacy programs in schools.

That includes teaching students how information was being manipulated behind the scenes, says the organization’s president Erin McNeill.

“With Facebook, for example, why am I seeing this story on the top of the page?” she asks. “Is it because it’s the most important story, or is it because of another reason?”

But Facebook’s new algorithm threatens to make existing fake news problems even worse, Ingram says. By focusing on friends and family, it could strengthen the filter bubble even further. Rewarding “engagement” can just as easily incentivize the worst aspects of the internet.

You know what’s really good at getting engagement? Hoaxes. Conspiracy theories. Idiots who start fights in comments sections. Nuance doesn’t get engagement. Outrage does.

“Meaningful social interactions” is a hard concept for algorithms to grasp.

“It’s like getting algorithms to filter out porn,” Ingram says. “You and I know it when we see it. [But] algorithms are constantly filtering out photos of women breastfeeding.”

Facebook hasn’t wanted to push beyond the algorithm and play the censor. In fact, it’s gone in the opposite direction. After Facebook was accused of suppressing conservative news sites in its Trending Topics section in 2016, it fired its human editors. (Today, conspiracy theories continue to show up in Facebook’s Trending Topics.)

Instead, to determine the quality of news sites, Facebook is rolling out a two-question survey about whether users recognized certain media outlets, and whether they found them trustworthy. The problem, as many tech writers pointed out, is that a lot of Facebook users, like Trump, consider the Washington Post and the New York Times to be “fake news.”

The other problem? There are a lot fewer trustworthy news sources out there. And Facebook bears some of the blame for that, too.

FEAST AND FAMINE

It’s not fair, exactly, to say that Facebook killed the alt-weekly in Knoxville, Tennessee. But it probably landed the final blow.

The internet, obviously, has been killing newspapers for a very long time. Why, say, would you pay a monthly subscription to the Daily Cow, when you can get the milk online for free?

It killed other revenue sources as well. Craigslist cut out classified sections. Online dating killed personal ads. Amazon put many local mom-and-pop advertisers out of business.

Yet the Metro Pulse, Knoxville’s longtime alt-weekly, was still turning a slight profit in 2014 when the E.W. Scripps Company shut it down. So editor Coury Turczyn and a few other staffers set out to start their own paper.

But in the six months, it took to get the Knoxville Mercury off the ground, the market had changed.

“We lost a lot more small-business advertisers than we expected,” Turczyn says. Facebook had captured them.

At one time, alt-weeklies could rake in advertising money by selling cheaper rates and guaranteeing advertisers to hit a younger, hipper, edgier audience. But then Facebook came along. The site lets businesses micro-target their advertisements at incredibly specific audiences.

Like Google, Facebook tracks you across the web, digging deep into your private messages to figure out whether to sell you wedding dresses, running shoes or baby formula.

“You go to Facebook, you can try to pick your audience based on their geographic location, their interests,” Turczyn says. It’s cheaper. It’s easier. And it comes with a report chock-full of stats on who the ad reached.

“Even if it doesn’t result in any sales and foot traffic, it at least has this report,” Turczyn says.

Mercury ad reps would cite examples of businesses who advertised in print and saw their foot traffic double the next day — but the small businesses wouldn’t bite. Attempts to rally reader donations weren’t enough. The Mercury shut down in July.

“It’s just more of the same sad story,” Turczyn says. “It’s a slaughter, there’s no doubt about it.”

Turczyn says two decades of journalism experience hasn’t helped much with the job search. Journalists aren’t what outlets are looking for.

“The single biggest job opening I see consistently is social media manager. Or ‘digital brand manager,’” Turczyn says. “Those are the jobs on the marketplace right now.’

It’s not that nobody’s making massive amounts of money on advertising online. It’s just that only two are: Facebook and Google — and they’re both destroying print advertising.

The decline in print advertising has ravaged the world of alt-weeklies, killing icons like the Boston Phoenix, the San Francisco Bay Guardian, the Philadelphia City Paper and the Baltimore City Paper.

Dailies keep suffering, too, no matter how prestigious or internet-savvy.

The West Virginia Gazette-Mail won a Pulitzer Prize last year for reporting on the opioid crisis. It filed for bankruptcy last month. Eleven staffers were cut from the Oregonian on Jan. 31, the same day Silicon Valley’s San Jose Mercury News slashed staff.

McClatchy’s made a lot of cuts in the last year, too, though Grieve declined to say exactly how many positions have been eliminated. He, for one, doesn’t blame Facebook.

“Our newsrooms are smaller than they once were, but because we’re so focused on serving the needs of our communities, we’re actually reaching more readers than we ever have before,”  Grieve writes in an email.

Yet the convergence of layoffs with the pressure to get web traffic, Robinson says, has influenced coverage. When potential traffic numbers are an explicit factor in story selection and you’re short-staffed, you have to make choices. Stories about schools don’t get many clicks. Weird crime stories do.

But as a long-time reporter, Robinson knows that bombshell scoops can sometimes begin with mundane reporting. Fail to report on the dull stuff, and you don’t know what else you’re missing.

“The media companies want the traffic, the traffic, the traffic,” Robinson says. “The stuff [readers] need to know — but don’t know they need to know — disappears.”

Asked if there’s any reason for optimism, Ingram, at the Columbia Journalism Review, lets out a wry laugh.

If you’re not a behemoth like BuzzFeed, he says, your best bet is to be small enough to be supported by die-hard readers.

“If you’re really, really hyper-focused — geographically or on a topic — then you have a chance,” Ingram says. “Your readership will be passionate enough to support you in some way.”

That’s one reason some actually welcome the prospect of less Facebook traffic. Slate’s Will Oremus recently wrote that less news on Facebook would eventually cleanse news of “the toxic incentives of the algorithm on journalism.”

Maybe, the thinking goes, without a reliance on Facebook clicks, newspapers would once again be able to build trust with their readers. Maybe, the hope goes, readers would start seeking out newspapers directly again.

But even if Facebook suddenly ceased to exist, there are other sites with other algorithms that can drive traffic and shape coverage. As traffic referred by Facebook falls, the focus at McClatchy is already shifting. You can optimize your news coverage to appear high in the Facebook News Feed — but you can also optimize it to appear higher in the Google search results.

“We’re all about Google, again,” Robinson says. “Google, Google, Google.”

The Value of Real News

The experiment has escaped the lab and is running amok across our great land. Thanks, Facebook. Many once thought that social media would save us — that it would break down borders, unite the globe, make us smarter, happier and more engaged in the world.

I’m not sure anyone believes that anymore. Turns out, it hasn’t broken down borders, but rather helped create social bubbles where our beliefs harden. It hasn’t united us but revealed how polarized we’ve become. It often hasn’t made us smarter but instead tricked us with clickbait.

At this point, it’s clear that even Facebook’s founder didn’t anticipate how the site would be used and abused, or how foreign agents looking to sow some good ol’ chaos would game Facebook’s algorithms to subvert American democracy. Further, it’s apparent now that Facebook — and Google and Twitter, for that matter — didn’t look too closely at the money being exchanged to see who was paying and who was profiting from all the fakery.

Yet, at the same time these platforms — Google and Facebook, especially — were spreading misinformation and fake news like wildfire, they were also draining digital advertising dollars from the very news outlets that could combat those forces with real journalism.

That’s not exactly new: The news business has long been outwitted by these tech giants — lured by vast internet audiences, they’ve essentially provided free content to Facebook and Google, while the duopoly courted their advertisers — but I believe that the journalists who confronted that impossible choice ultimately wanted to deliver the news, even at their own expense.

And now Facebook is poised to change the rules of the game yet again. Struggling to repel fake news and the antagonism permeating the site, founder Mark Zuckerberg announced last month that it would deprioritize news in favor of posts from friends and family. It’s sent a shockwave through the news industry, much of which has strategically aligned its priorities with Facebook’s and raised serious questions for consumers, for news outlets and for our democracy.

The situation is still shaking out, but the hope is not lost. Indeed, the value of actual journalism — say, the New York Times or the very paper you’re reading — becomes really obvious when held up against flawed algorithms and fake news. With change coming to Facebook, however, you may have to directly seek out the news sources you like to follow, rather than counting on them to appear in the site’s revamped News Feed.

Go to our website:   www.ncmalliance.com

FACEBOOK Fake News Feed Frenzy, & The Damage Done To Real News Outlets   by Jamie Moses For years, media outlets desperately chased the clicks promised by Facebook; now the social media giant threatens to destroy them…