#recommend the fuck out of it for someone who likes watching tropes get turned on their head

[holylulusworld]

Pour me some love (1) - Flufftober 13

Summary: He always ends up in your roadhouse.

Pairing: Biker!Dean Winchester x Plussized!Reader

Trope: Love at First Sight

Warnings: flirty Dean, shy/low self-esteem, fluff

Idea by: @elle14-blog1

Kinktober vs Flufftober 2024

Life is slow out here. You’re used to it. Years of spending your time after school at your dad’s bar taught you two things. Men can be the worst, and alcohol is not for you.

After your dad retired, his partner Ellen Harvelle took over the business. She was kind enough to offer you to stay and work for her. In the back to take care of the finances, and in the front to help her with the thirsty crowd.

Most of your guests at the roadhouse are regulars. The usual drunk, the businessmen wanting to drown their sorrows in booze, and the lonely hearts seeking company. But sometimes you get lucky and a stranded traveler or someone catching your attention ends up in your bar.

Just like tonight. He’s back, with company: Dean Winchester, your dream man on bowed legs.

You sigh watching him step inside the bar. He straightens his tousled hair as the single ladies in the bar crane their necks. You rarely get the chance to look at men like the Winchesters and their friends.

Bikers. Rough around the edges, a little cocky, and so damn handsome.

You know little to nothing about them. What you know is that John Winchester, leader of the Purgatory biker club, is Dean and Sam’s father.

Sam, the younger brother, has a girl in tow. His girlfriend Ruby. She glares at the woman at the bar, marking her property by wrapping her arms around Sam’s neck to kiss him fiercely.

They make out for a moment before John clears his throat. He came here for drinks and a cheap bed, not to watch his son fuck Ruby with his tongue. “Sammy, get your shit together,” he grits out before walking toward the table he always occupies when he’s around.

He nods at Ellen, who already carries his favorite poison toward the table, along with enough glasses for his friends.

“Welcome back, John,” Ellen says. “No fights. No swear words. No smoking at my place, Winchester.”

John smirks. “I wouldn’t dare cause trouble at your place, Ellen.” She huffs and turns toward the bar to nod at you. You’ve got your hands full with the other guests, but the biker club tips well.

“Hello sweetheart,” Dean, the elder brother, claims the only free seat at the bar counter. “What can you recommend today?” He licks his sinfully plump lips, eyes glued to your chest. “What’s on the menu tonight?”

“We’re not a diner, Dean,” you tease, and slap his chest with the dishtowel in your hand. “We’ve got peanuts, beer, booze, and bad music blaring from the centuries-old music box.”

Dean grins now. He loves that you do not shy away from him any longer. In the beginning, when he first came to the bar, you barely got a word out when he tried to chat you up.

His constant flirting and charming personality changed your mind about bikers and men in general. You slowly warmed up to Dean, and now you fear he owns your heart.

Sadly, you’ve got no clue if he feels the same or if he’s just friendly to every woman. Dean is a natural flirt, and you fear; he only tries to make you feel better. Because most of the guys coming to the bar rather flirt with Jo or the other pretty and petite waitresses.

“Hey, if you stare at Y/N as if she’s on the menu, you’ll pay for her too,” Jo slams her hand onto the bar counter. She grins as Dean’s cheeks redden.

“I was asking about the special tonight,” Dean grumbles under his breath. Another missed chance to talk to you without someone ruining it.

“Babe,” Jo whispers in your ear, “don’t make it easy for him. Make him beg for it. You’re too good for a one-night stand.”

“He wouldn't... he didn’t,” you splutter, catching Dean’s attention. He watches you nervously tug at the Zeppelin shirt you found in a drift shop. You bought it because you remember he told you about his weakness for classic rock.

“I got an eye on you, Winchester,” Jo glares at Dean. “One wrong move, and you end up spitting blood, mister.”

“Jo!” You tut.

She snickers before walking off. Jo met lots of bikers in her life. None of them meant what they promised a girl. She learned the hard way what heartbreak means.

“So... uh, any food tonight?” Dean hopefully asks. Last time he came around, you offered the rest of your homemade lasagna to him. He inhaled the food.

“I got some pie left.” You barely get the words out before he grabs your hand, holding it in his. “What?”

“Pie? I love me some pie,” Dean exclaims before leaning over the bar counter. “I swear, if your pie is as sweet as you, I’m going to marry you.”

You harrumph and wiggle out of his grip. “What are you doing, Dean?” You sniffle. “Listen, I know you’re a natural flirt, but stop pretending you like me or shit. That’s not fair, you know. A man like you shouldn’t give a girl like me hope.”

You throw the dishtowel at him before storming out of the bar to get fresh air.

“WINCHESTER!” Jo growls. She jumps over the bar counter to get the baseball bat she hides there in case one of the guests gets a little too cocky.

“I didn’t do a thing!” Dean gets off his seat to run after you. “Sonofabitch!”

“I hope so!” Jo yells after him, earning a chuckle from the rest of the biker gang. They all know Dean has a big crush on you.

“Sweetheart wait! Wait up!” Dean chases after you. He wheezes when you finally stop and wait for him to catch up with you. “I—phew.” He huffs. “I didn’t know running is so exhausting.”

“Dean, what do you want? Is this all a game to you?” You wipe your eyes. “Because it’s not funny to flirt with a girl you’re not interested in.”

“Y/N,” he grabs your upper arms, still panting. “Shit, give me a sec, baby. I—fuck. My sides hurt, and my lungs feel like I ran a marathon.”

You giggle as he tries to catch his breath. “I would never make fun of you,” he squeezes your arms before dropping his hands. Dean cups your face instead, looking you deep in the eyes. “Sweetheart, I fell in love with you the moment I stepped into the bar for the first time. I just didn’t know how to ask you on a date.”

“What? I—what?” You believe you misheard. “You can’t be serious.”

“I’m damn serious, sweetheart,” Dean says and jerks his head toward a black classic muscle car parked in front of the bar. “I came with my Baby, not my bike, tonight to ask you to go for a ride with me.”

Oh, he grins with a twinkle in his eyes.

“I’m not a girl for one night.” You pout and sniff.

“Sweetheart,” he leans closer to murmur your name. “Do you believe I’m the kind of guy going for a wild ride with the girl he loves only once?”

You shake your head.

“Good,” he nods. “Now, let me kiss my girl. And then I’ll take her for a romantic ride in my car.

Read more here: Pour me some love (2)

[chaifootsteps]

I wanna start this out by saying I’ve known about vivzie for at least maybe 5 years or more now, and have never been interested in her shows until my YouTube recommended was bombarded with videos covering Hazbin which forced me (sarcasm) to watch both series overnight.

I started with ep 4 first because it was the most controversial and I wanted to actively torture myself, half of the interest in ep 4 for me was the fact that I generally have a strong stomach when it comes to certain shit, including what I’ll call trauma porn, which is basically just a constant flow of traumatic horrible shit happening to a character or characters on screen for sympathy or to poorly simulate a provocative, deep story through a constant bombarding of terrible things. I like horror and I was groomed using some fucked up shit so emotionally I’m not easily fazed by a lot of things outside of extreme sexual violence. I also have a noncon kink as a victim of sa. I’ll say that I wasn’t as disturbed as I’d initially thought I’d be, but like. Very confused and bewildered by everything that was happening, it’s difficult to describe, but at some point I stopped trying to be immersed and kept thinking about how this got published as is. The moment that it all turned into what I could best describe as a music video I almost wanted to laugh at the absurdity and how bad this all was. Like. They thought this was what? Thought provoking? Not clearly just a fetish put on screen for the shock value of it all?

It’s not one of the most tasteless depictions of sexual assault I’ve seen, but that’s mainly because it’s so juvenile, it’s akin to how children write things like this in their fanfics and oc stories. I definitely understand why people were caught off guard by it — especially younger viewers because this is tasteless as all fuck. I get having certain fucked up kinks, but like. Inserting certain things into your works meant to be seen by a larger audience is so fucking stupid.

But like, I’d argue it’s all over the place as someone who’s seen media like this. Like in helluva boss, I’d argue the stolas kidnapping episode was full of it. In a lot of yaoi stuff that I was groomed on violence is a sort of “foreplay” in the story, it preludes the noncon bits, plays into greater themes of humiliation and domination. Moxie also has a bunch of weird shit done to him that fits a lot of the shit I’ve seen including that whole episode where they meet his dad. Admittedly, I liked fizz and asmodeus because the next time we see them they’re being domestic and shit and it was a good break for my brain because I couldn’t stand the plot and a good chunk of our cast, but yeah they also fall into yaoi tropes though it’s not the most egregious. Stolitz is just your general yaoi trope, questionable consent paired with a will they won’t they with the objectifying party realizing they’re actually in love with the person they’re constantly objectifying who is made out as the bad guy for not reciprocating their feelings for obvious reasons. Also the royalty x poor person plot line where the poor person is bought at some point for the royal, the only thing inherently different than most stories I’ve seen as that stolas is the bottom and blitz is the top. Half of the reason I can’t stand any of this shit is that most of the masculine characters will definitely have a male love interest or character that they use to write in more yaoi storylines and. Yaoi storylines suck ass. It’s a shame that this is counted as queer fiction at all because it is just plain yaoi shit, and as a gay guy I hate that.

Anyways fuck this show actually coming out and fucking with the YouTube algorithm enough to get my attention, I wish I could take those hours of my life back, but I will definitely rant about this again.

Please come by again to share if you do! Lord knows there's so much to be ranted about.

[smutconnoisseur]

𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐭 𝐊𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐚’𝐬 𝐑𝐞𝐜’𝐬

This rec list is created for @stuckybingo

Card # R40101 | Square filled - B4 | AU: Lawyer

Title ⊳ Innocent Until

Author ⊳ L1av

Pairing ⊳ James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers

Rating ⊳Explicit

Word Count ⊳138K

Major Tags ⊳ Lawyer!Bucky, BDSM, Kink, Mutual Pining, Hurt/Comfort, Secret Relationship

Summary ⊳ Bucky Barnes made a name for himself as the attorney who could get anyone off, but he still lives by the saying, "Innocent until proven guilty." Steve Rogers finds himself on trial for multiple homicides but he swears he was only trying to protect a girl. Bucky's been in this business long enough to know when someone's innocent, and Steve is innocent. Steve already feels like a monster and Bucky's worried this guy's going to lay himself on the sword come his trial. So Bucky offers up another course for punishment:

Turns out, chains and whips really excite Steve.

Commentary ⊳ The moral dilemma of a taboo relationship between attorney and client is pushed to the limits in this emotional whirlwind. It explores the start of a complicated relationship based on trust that, with tensions and compatibility so off the fucking charts, it left me screaming and crying for a happy outcome—and for Steve to be proven innocent.

Read it here

Title ⊳ A Hard Case of You

Author ⊳ @chiyume

Pairing ⊳ James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers

Rating ⊳ Explicit

Word Count ⊳21K

Major Tags ⊳Mechanic!Steve, Lawyer!Bucky, Strangers To Lovers, First Meetings, Homophobic Language, Happy Ending

Summary ⊳ James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes, seasoned lawyer at Shield Legal Services, New York City office, is in a bad mood.

He’s driving down the I-90 from Buffalo in his sleek black company car, AC running on cool to keep the air from growing stuffy. He’s got his jaw set in that particular way he knows will cause him a major headache in a few hours, but right now the last thing on his mind is his own future discomfort.

In which Bucky's car breaks down when he's already feeling his worst, and he's forced to seek help from whatever's nearby. Luckily, Rogers' Auto Repair isn't too far away, and everyone seems very enthusiastic about recommending the place. But when Bucky gets there, he has a hard time seeing the professional the whole town's been speaking of so fondly...

Commentary ⊳ Bucky being stranded with only mechanic Steve who can help. Ahhhhhhh. Two idiots and the fun use of tropes.

Read it here

Title ⊳ Sweet Sugar

Author ⊳ this_wayward_life

Pairing ⊳ James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers

Rating ⊳ Explicit

Word Count ⊳ 8K

Major Tags ⊳ Lawyer!Bucky, Student!Steve, Age Difference, Sugar Daddy Bucky Barnes, Meet-Cute

Summary ⊳ This is not Bucky's scene.

Truthfully, most social situations aren't his scene, but particularly this one. He's closer to forty than thirty-five these days, and spending time in an overcrowded bar whose population tends to fall towards the early twenties side of the age scale is not something he particularly enjoys. If it was up to Bucky, he'd be spending his Friday night either in his office catching up on the Martinelli case or half-asleep on the couch, re-watching Criminal Minds and snuggling with his cat.

But, since Bucky sold his soul over to the Devil in sophomore year of law school when he made friends with one Natasha Romanoff, he's here, stuffed into a shirt that is a bit too tight around his midsection and jeans that he can barely sit down in.

Commentary ⊳ College jock Steve pursuing grumpy Bucky, and Bucky accidentally acquires a sugar baby. Also—BOTTOM DADDY BUCKY makes me feral.

Read it here

Rec Masterlist

Header created by @rookthorne

[mermaidsirennikita]

What are your favorite Grace Callaway books?

She has a good-sized backlist, and I've just started my third series by her.

Grace Callaway is for when you wanna read like, a Tessa Dare-esque sense of humor mixed with MacLeanian girl gang/"oh there she goes, cartwheeling into mortal peril while the big man who's in love with her shrieks in panic" vibes, topped off with lots of sex scenes that are generally more creative than those you'll find in trad HR, often with a dusting of light kink. Age gaps are common, but not guaranteed. A lot of her heroines are virgins, but not all. You'll frequently find a hero who's like "God this bitch gives me a migraine but I love her so much" and a heroine who's all "what? like it's hard?" when her hero cautions her against deep throating him on the first try.

I....love these qualities. I did break my usual protocol re: reading out of order, because I began her most recent series first. And that's fine, but her books are generational. So everyone's kids grow up and fuck each other, as God intended.

Generally, though, I'd recommend

The whole Lady Charlotte's Society of Scoundrels series, which is a Victorian Charlie's Angels setup. Such a solid series thus far. The main entries are:

Olivia and the Masked Duke--Heroine sees the hero, who she's known since he saved her life when she was like 12, fucking another woman in a D/s scenario and realizes that she Must Have Him. A good Stern Daddy/Bratty sub book, with the added bonus of the hero being like... 10-12 years older than the heroine and feeling Super Guilty about corrupting her. He's friends with her daaaaad which I ... love.

Pippa and the Prince of Secrets--Widowed heroine reconnects with the guy who gave her her first kiss when they were teens. He's now the scarred leader of a band of child spies (more common than you'd think in historical romance) and he wears a mask and has an exhibitionism kink. It is HOT it is ANGSTY, it's probably my favorite Grace because the moment when he lets her see his whole face is... so much. As is the scene where he gives her multiples in front of like dozens of people in an orgy.

Fiona and the Enigmatic Earl--Intrepid spitfire crosses paths with an ESPIONAGE EARL (TM) on one of her "missions" and they try to do a fakeout makeout to stay undercover but it turns into him getting her off against a wall and after that he's like "uh well I guess I should propose" and they try to have a cool respectable marriage but their passion is 2 Much. At one point one point they fuck in a room knowing that someone is watching through a peephole. This happens more than you'd think in Grace Callaway's England.

Glory and the Master of Shadows--Duke's daughter becomes the mentee of a Chinese underworld master (not sexy master; he's been celibate for YEEEEARS) and he's like "wow would be much easier to mentor her if I didn't fantasize about putting my dick in her mouth on the reg". He does eat her out in a hallway with her parents sleeping like, feet away.

Then, outside of that series, I love:

The Duke Who Knew Too Much--Okay this one is fucking balls out hilarious because the heroine is like an INTREPID DETECTIVE (a lot of Grace heroines are INTREPID DETECTIVES who like, lick their finger and test the air and go "he went north" while the hero is all, "I mean we received a ransom note telling us he went north but okay" to sum up the vibe) and she comes upon the hero, a scary lord man, doing a bit o' light CNC with his mistress, and she's like "EGADS" and then when the mistress dies he has to take her to a sex club and be like "look I'm not a murderer I just like to tie bitches up and fuck them" and she's like "... tell me more. for the case."

M is for Marquess--I like this one a lot, because it has one of my historical romance novel tropes, which is "girl has mild asthma so the hero is afraid of fucking her to death". This hero is SO. SO AFRAID. OF KILLING HER WITH HIS PENIS. He also is like "my dead wife called me a depraved fiend, no one shall accept me", because he likes domming a bit. A lot of Grace heroes have dead wives, who were not fun. This book also has one of the least annoying romance novel children, mostly because he has anxiety, and the heroine kinda calls the hero a bad father...? I died.

Her Prodigal Passion--I like this one because the hero is a total wastrel and then as he's shaping up the heroine, who has been obsessed with him for years but gave up on it after he gave her an orgasm while he was high (that's True Rake Game) and then forgot about it, ends up entangled with him. There's a scene where phrenology, the practice of feeling skulls for lumps to sum up your personality, is used in a Sexy Way.

[yunoteru4ever]

Platinum End is plenty different enough from Future Diary

So I've finally tried Platinum End, which I mentioned over 18 months ago as a PURPORTED Mirai Nikki-like. At first I was going to read the manga, but I shifted over to the anime adaption and just finished watching.

When Platinum End's manga first got going in late 2015, it had a lot of expectation surrounding it because it was Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata follow-up to their incredibly popular Death Note series. Those of us who were around and paying attention back then like also recall how Platinum End got a lot of flack during its early manga run for supposedly being a Mirai Nikki ripoff. I remember plenty of derisive comments pointing out "12 13 unstable people compete to be the next god? A depressed and weak-willed guy + his love interest team up to fight off the rest? One of their opponents is even a wannabe-sentai superhero???"

(Mind you, this was in the mid-2010s — back before the Internet Hive Mind largely decided that Mirai Nikki was always secretly shitty. :( *siiiiiigh*)

But nevermind all that: In actuality, Platinum End is very good at doing its own damn thing!

The male protagonist is deadass named "Mirai." Sadly, the girl's name is not "Nikki."

Major setup differences:

There is no Survival Game built into the contest for god. All candidates could just meet up and agree on a new god if they chose to do so. But of course, more than one of them decides that the best course of action is to kill all challengers, so survival definitely becomes a factor FAST. But in this story, unlike Mirai Nikki, there is no real reason NOT to team up with other candidates... provided they aren't planning to off you later.

The god candidates in Future Diary get to have Future Diaries. Obviously. But the god candidates in Platinum End instead get divine powers gifted by their guardian angels. Yes, once you're a candidate, you can see and interact with your guardian angel. Only other candidates can see your angel and your powers. Based on your angel's rank in heaven, you might be gifted either one or a combination of the following: (A) angel wings capable of lightspeed flight, (B) a "red arrow" that makes anyone hit by it instantly adore and love you, making them very susceptible to your wishes... but only for 33 days, and/or (C) a "white arrow" that kills a person instantly on contact.

Mirai's angel, Nasse, might secretly be the series' best character. She's a delight. She does get a lot less focus in the second half of the series, though.

What spawns from this setup is a story that maintains a largely serious tone while veering between very different styles of conflicts. The first half of the series is heavy on suspense and action — complete with the shonen-like tropes of multi-episode showdowns that feature characters standing in place while inner monologues go over their attack plans. :P The second half of the series, by contrast, is heavy on debates about existential concepts and personal morality.

If that sounds good to you, I can recommend 23 out of this series' 24 episodes! But the very last one is, IMO, best ignored/skipped. It's a shitty denouement that, for me, ruined a lot of what came before it while simultaneously failing to answer the questions it raises. However, ep. 23 has a very satisfying conclusion; you'll be good there.

FINALLY! I must warn y'all about this: If you're someone who thought Mirai Nikki's Yukiteru was too "whiny" or too averse to violence? You are not ready for how weak-willed and confrontation-averse the male protagonist of Platinum End is. Somebody took those traits and turned that dial up as HIGH AS POSSIBLE.

For example: For a LOOOONG time, Mirai can't even bring himself to use a "weapon" GUARANTEED TO NOT HURT HIS OPPONENT IN ANY WAY WHATSOEVER, even when said opponent is TRYING THEIR BEST TO MURDER HIM RIGHT FUCKING NOW. He just won't use his guaranteed-peaceful solution, because it still represents some form of "attack." The other person has a one-shot insta-kill attack, and Mirai is over here like "How could I live with myself if I hit this person with this ultra-plushie boxing glove?!" It's truly unbelievable.

[secret-diary-of-an-fa]

Doctor Who: Wild Blue Yonder Review

Quick question, Russel T. Davies: where the fuck did THIS come from? I only ask because this is a genuinely brilliant, exciting, well-written episode of Doctor Who that feels like the best of your original run, whereas- no offence- The Star Beast was a confused, underwhelming mess. Seriously, if I was a teacher who had to grade both pieces of work, I’d assume you’d gotten illegal help with one of them. I mean, seriously Russ: what did you do between writing Exhibit A (the mess) and Exhibit B (the fucking masterpiece)? Did you just neck a fuckload of hallucinogens? Did you finally get laid? Did you allow yourself to be beaten over the head with a big, rubber hammer? Whatever it was that made the difference, please, please keep doing it.

And now to address my actual readers: Wild Blue Yonder is very, very good and I recommend you watch it with a fucking colostomy bag in, because it is shit-yourself scary. The Doctor and Donna get stranded on a spaceship at the literal edge of the universe (she spilled some tea on the TARDIS console, because of course she fucking did) and there are things aboard from the darkness beyond that edge. Lacking shape or form or mass- being entities of pure, malignant consciousness in fact- they assume the forms of Donna and the Doctor and proceed, forthwith, to fuck with them in the most unsettling and horrific manner possible. It’s creepy as fuck to see the copied bodies of our leads distort and warp in horrendous, Kronenberg-ish ways as the entities from the dark beyond existence seek to elicit their fear, but the real-headfuck comes from their refusal to give up the pretence, remaining in-character even while waxing loquacious on their evil plans (which I won’t spoil). There’s an element of psychological warfare- even torture- at play here, as they gradually tease out bits of buried darkness and it’s deeply, deeply affecting. It’s strikes a delicate balance, being the kind of thing that you can get away with on prime-time TV without pulling its punches one fucking iota.

Of course, this being a Doctor Who episode, the horror is tempered with humour and quite a bit of silliness. There’s a line about how someone “Got a very old robot out of storage to walk, very slowly, down a very long corridor” that, in context is giggle-worthy (particularly with the additional knowledge that the Doctor has named the robot ‘Jimbo’) and a bit where the leads meet Isaac Newton and then discuss how hot was (with the Doctor being surprised to realise that recent experiences have turned him just a tiny bit gay).

The Doctor also gets to be the Doctor in this episode- running around, solving mysteries and finding ways to fight monsters. Not fucking victims of a ‘psychedelic sun’ or insect blokes who eventually turn out to be good guys: actual, no-holes-barred, proper Doctor Who monsters! I won’t spoil the solution he eventually hits on, but it’s bombastic and clever and entertaining in a way that literally nothing in The Star Beast was.

Oh, and no spoilers, but the final scene nearly made me cry. In a good way.

Obviously, I have gripes. Well, one gripe. Namely: Sir Isaac ‘Mr. Gravity’, Fuck You Newton was not a mixed-race individual and while colour-blind casting is fine (great, actually) for fictional characters, you can’t just race-swap actual people who actually lived and had identities of their own. The past isn’t just a big dustbin of fun characters and events to be pilfered for content: it’s a series of lives and experiences lived by real, sentient people who, if they had any say in the matter, would probably like to be accurately represented after their deaths. Even in an upbeat work of fiction, the past ought to be treated with a modicum of tact and delicacy; its tropes and ways of being preserved with all their flaws rather than suborned to suit modern audiences. Irreverence is fine: wild inaccuracy isn’t. I’d also like to point out that, if they wanted a non-white physicist in the episode, there are fucking loads of real ones who just aren’t taught in the Western scientific canon. This could have been a good time to introduce wider audiences to, say, Robert Bragg or Arthur B.C. Walker, Jr (who is the only reason we today can observe the sun’s corona accurately enough to get a sense of what it’s fucking doing, by the way). I mean, surely drawing attention to real non-white scientists is much more meaningful than pretending a dude with skin like fucking Savlon wasn’t Caucasian. It’s less attention-grabbing, of course, and it doesn’t virtue-signal as hard, but it’s more meaningfully progressive and actually serves to enlighten and inform viewers.

Okay, that’s out my system now. I would like to stress that I’ve only devoted so much time to that because it’s important to clarify where my objection comes from, lest some cretin completely miss the point and set up a chant of ‘bigot’ (probably misspelled as bigfoot because of the autocorrect on their cunting smartphone) right outside my blog. I often find that the people who object to these false representations publicly are just bigots because decent, progressive people are too bloody scared to point out the real flaws. It’s therefore important, as a progressive, anti-racist person, to raise objections that are actually sane, lest our entire cultural debate descend into a slap-fight between hateful, ill-read fascist micrococks and sanctimonious, reality-denying nutbars. All that being said, not-really-Isaac-Newton is only in Wild Blue Yonder for, like, three minutes, so in terms of the episode itself, it really is a teeny-tiny gripe and shouldn’t in any way ruin anyone’s enjoyment thereof. (EDIT: I actually considered deleting this whole bit, but that felt obscurely like cowardice, so I settled for a rewrite that shortened my original rant considerably).

A more immediately relevant discussion might be why Wild Blue Yonder worked where The Star Beast failed. And no, I don’t think it’s just that Our Russ got laid between script-writing sessions. Have you seen his face nowadays? He looks like a potato receiving an unexpected suppository. Nobody’s into that. No, I suspect the reason Wild Blue Yonder works is the tight focus and small scale. Essentially, its four characters- the protagonists plus two antagonists- on a spaceship, trying to out-think each other. There’s mystery, conflict and an interesting setting to provide context, and that’s all any story really needs. I often find that mistakes and poor writing creep into telly shows and films in proportion to the amount of superfluous shit they give themselves to juggle. I think there needs to be a term for that, so I’m going to coin one: ‘Concept Bloat’. The more extra characters and ideas and elements an individual episode of a TV show has, the more likely one of them is to go wrong, and when one thing goes wrong, a lot of other less-than-optimal stuff is allowed to slide by unchallenged because it looks fine next to the thing that actually went properly, fully wrong. The Star Beast is actually a perfect study of how this happens. The ‘Roth Warriors’ (I have no idea if I’m spelling that correctly, nor do I care) looked rubbish, but their rubbishness was less obvious than it should have been compared to the overall look of the episode’s fictitious London. Meanwhile, the plastic-y version of London probably seemed acceptable in the context of a plot where reversing a star-ship engine can magically heal streets. The magically-healing streets probably seemed fine because they were sharing plot-space with a wheelchair containing a hidden rocket-launcher (to clarify, I have no problem with a wheelchair that can shoot rockets- I just don’t think there’s any way you could make it look like a regular wheelchair). The sheer absurdity of this might well have gone unnoticed because, next to phrases like ‘Male Presenting Time Lord’, stupid tech probably seemed fine. And phrases like ‘Male Presenting Time Lord’ probably seemed acceptable when spoken two minutes after an encounter with a crappy-looking Roth Warrior, bringing us full circle. With a more streamlined set of ideas, it would have been easier to prune out the bad ones, or retool them until they worked. Each individual nugget of crap, however, allowed the crap on either side of it to pass unnoticed and what you ended up with was, well, The Star Beast. In contrast, Wild Blue Yonder is as tight as an XS rubber gimp suit and genuinely brilliant. It does more with less because there was time to hone and polish the less.

So what does this say about the future of the show? In my last review, I implied that the best thing that could happen to Who would be cancellation- a chance for the show to end on a satisfying note rather than change into something it was never designed to be. As much as I love Who, I’ve arrived at that the conclusion that quality alone isn’t the issue. Even if every episode of the next few series ends up being as good as Wild Blue Yonder, it still can’t go on indefinitely- not with any integrity. The best stories in the world are still only truly satisfying in the moment you close the book, having experienced the full, majestic sweep of the narrative and understood what it was saying creatively and philosophically. TV shows aren’t exactly the same, since they’re less singular efforts and don’t have a single story to tell, but even they eventually have to shit or get off the pot, which means actually ending at some point. So yes, I’m glad showrunner RTD has hit his stride with Wild Blue Yonder, but trying to bottle lightning is never going to work reliably and it doesn’t change the fact that, sooner or later, something is going to have to give. So yeah: I’m still at ‘Let Gatwa have his time and then call an end to it’. One good episode- one really fucking good episode- isn’t enough to fix the show’s underlying problem. I mean, it can be a hiatus rather than fullblown cancellation, but Who still needs some kind of break. Sorry.

[delusion-of-negation]

Favorite weird story trope/idea?

I'm torn between three things: things like happy sugar life where tropes and emotions usually seen as loving or good are made as horrifying as possible (spoilers: imagine the worst possible ways feeling love could manifest and the worst things it could make a person do, or to put it bluntly she murders people because she's kidnapped a kid she's in love with, and it's such a good show); or something I blame neil gaiman for is my love for when what you previously saw as kind of background noise/setting that you are vaguely aware might have some level of sentience gets put into someone's body and experiences being a weird human because neil's doctor who episode gave me feelings; but I think the most favourite would probably be when there's two sides scheming in opposite directions and the entire plot is just the perfect level of tense maintained, in that it lets you breathe occasionally but the tenseness uses the fact you breathed against you to come back even harder, ie the promised neverland, I cannot stress just how great that show is at making you feel the pressure, and there's a constant way out but they don't take it because they need to do something else first, and I can't explain much without spoilers, I genuinely recommend watching it yourself, it's an anime (and it actually is an adaptation of a manga), but anyway you're now in spoiler land, basically the plot is these kids are in an orphanage, however it turns out to be a kid farm for monsters that eat them meaning they need to escape before they turn too old, and they basically have to work out what every trap and defence is to get around them and escape, without the lady that runs it catching them and stopping them, and she's on their trail the whole time, when they figure it out they could just leave but they don't right away because they need to get everyone out, including toddlers who'd be unable to do some of the physical stuff themselves so they've gotta keep figuring out solutions. it's not got very much action or drama, it's intensely focused on the testing things and figuring out what's going on and planning around it, and it really takes time to flesh out every single detail and to think about the implications of everything, it's great and thought-out, but you're going to have to ignore how one character is drawn. actually, I'd have to add another maybe to the list of maybe favourites, since that and invincible both do one of my favourite things, where an absolutely horrifying reveal hits you like a fucking train, where it begins seemingly normal and not horror, and then towards their first episode's end the bomb drops and chills you to your core, it completely changes the direction and vibe of the show, etc, that moment kills me in both shows and I love it so so much in both. speaking on a meta level, "this cgi looks terrible, I'm going to go watch it to laugh!" [a few hours later] "I am fundamentally never going to be the same again. I am moved in ways I didn't know a person could be moved in." has been a great experience when I watched sweet home and hellbound, those two shows are really genuinely some of the best things you'll watch in your entire life. there's monsters in sweet home, but the reveal some are totally harmless is when my favourite character turns into a bathroom sized womb because she's mourning the kid she accidentally let roll into the road, and I love her so fucking much. she's the best. personally I too want to turn into a giant organ in the only damn bathroom anyone had so they can't fucking piss without leaving their safe flat and going out where there's monsters, queen shit. completely forgot the ask and went on several tangents, sorry.

[ere-the-sun-rises]

I've had to read "pretentious" literature for my studies and I've read plenty of regular and YA novels in my time. Here's the truth of it.

"The classics" of literature can be boring because they invented concepts we use all the time. It invents things that are basic to us now and revolutionary at the time. The Odyssey by Homer? The oldest example we have of a lot of common literary devices and tropes - flashbacks, in medias res, unreliable narrator (depending on your interpretation), deus ex machina, non-linear storytelling and meta-narrative just to list a few.

But "the classics" can also be amazing. I adore The Odyssey. Odysseus is a complex character who's heroic (in the Greek sense), clever and often quite kind. His wife and son are equally clever and thoughtful and his relationship with Athena is very compelling. It's a fun story with a lot of twists and turns, if you sit back enough to enjoy it for its own sake. (I highly recommend the Fagles translation on audiobook - it's narrated by Ian McKellen! And just reading the poem can be a bit unpleasant the first time.)

But YA can also be both boring and compelling. For example, I respect the Hunger Games books because they contain a nuanced and valuable perspective on fascism and regime change. I cannot stand reading them. I find Katniss and Peeta particularly hard to bear which is a shame because they're the main characters. I found the Divergent series to be absolutely worthless, like someone was asked to spit out drivel halfway between Hunger Games and Harry Potter but failed to take anything that made either of them appealing. On the opposite end if the spectrum, I found Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao so enthralling I could not put it down. I related to Zetian more than I ever have for an MC and I tasted her rage and revenge vividly.

All three of those books are in first person. They're all YA and they're all dystopian. And I only *wanted* to read one of them.

There's a lot to learn from books you don't *want* to read but *should*. A Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood is a fucking harrowing read, so viscerally uncomfortable, upsetting and disheartening that it's overwhelming at some points. It took me months to finish it because the trepidation of what new horror awaited me was so strong. I could not recommend it more highly and one day, when I can muster the courage, I'll read it again simply because it's worth reading twice.

As for first or third person, that's purely a matter of taste and perception. I usually hate 1st person - I don't read to become the main character, I read to look at the life and world of someone else. I much prefer 3rd person in every respect.

But Iron Widow and A Handmaid's Tale would not work in 3rd. They are deeply personal stories written about the individual experience of oppression. You *must* live this alongside them or else it's not as poignant. Similarly, The Odyssey would not be improved by Odysseus' thoughts - it's much more meaningful to show us what he does and his clever and resourceful he is as opposed to having him tell us so.

In my opinion, 1st is much harder to pull off because you have to like the MC enough to want to get in their head. You can put up with a shit MC in 3rd because you're not living with them, you're watching them, and the focus can go other places. But in 1st, you're stuck. Even with multiple 1st person MCs, if the writer can't pull off one, the second likely isn't going to fare much better.

So it comes down to subjective character likability and writer talent - neither of which is exclusive to YA or any genre.

[gavingwhiz]

Old Who for New Who Enjoyers

I want to take a moment to recommend an episode of Old Doctor Who to people who might have only watched New Who and want like, just a good fucking couple hours of Doctor Who without committing to a full season or learning a ton of new-to-them lore All recommended to you by someone who has walked between the raindrops and has ONLY seen good episodes of old Doctor Who.

The Horror of Fang Rock is a four-episode serial that opens up season 15 of DW, firmly in the stage of Tom Baker holding up the show with the sheer strength of his commitment to the character. I’m told this is the high point of the season. Let me pitch it to you: the TARDIS lands near a lighthouse in early 1900s Britain. The Doctor makes a comment about it seemingly having gotten ‘lost in the fog’ and uses asking for directions as an excuse to investigate the lighthouse with a malfunctioning signal lamp. They meet the crew, who find them odd people (one might even say... alien). Basic Doctor Who setup. Except you, the audience member, have been made aware an alien crashed near the lighthouse and this unseen presence has been stalking the building. A member of the crew turns up dead, supposedly electrocuted by the lighthouse’s generator. You, and the Doctor, know this isn’t the case.

What follows is a series of locked door mysteries where an alien only the audience fully understands uses electricity to kill and then impersonate them, all while the Doctor and his companion try to save everyone else without knowing about the impersonations. There’s a creeping dread as the episodes really have fun playing with the audience knowing exactly who is possessed by the alien and where they are in the lighthouse while the Doctor and his companion (Leela, a ‘savage’ warrior trope I’m on the fence about) try to figure out the rules of the game they’re playing and defeat the thing.

Then, because one must raise the stakes, a yacht crashes into the shore near the lighthouse and suddenly there’s more people to defend and more scrutiny. As well as a subplot involving stocks. Exciting, I know. This serial has excellent inside-out mystery writing, the Doctor really shines, and the intentionally cramped location with few sets helps hide the budget of the show moreso than its more ambitious plots. Also it has adorable model shots of the TARDIS arriving and leaving that make me nostalgic for a time when we filmed actual objects being hit with actual light in the real world.

So yeah, if you’re down for something a little slower in pace that takes four episodes to finish, i highly recommend this as one of your first episodes! AND you get the bonus of having seen the episode of Doctor Who that was interrupted with the infamous 1987 Max Headroom TV hijacking

[m0srael]

A series in which I ask my mutuals for fanwork recs, and then come back and tell you why I loved them. Any chance you have something to rec (the criteria are virtually non-existent)? Please, please send it on. Here is my original ask with more info.

I Was Recced:

As The Lights Lift Around Us by @zeziliazink [Drarry | M | 25.6k]

“What?” Draco said, finally looking Potter in the eye. Potter’s eyes were wide and green below his raised eyebrows. It must have been the lenses of his glasses sharpening the flecks of color in his irises, because they were almost shimmering in the light of the hundred-year old sconce on the brick wall behind Draco’s head, and oh fuck, he was still looking Potter in the eye, what the fuck, how was he supposed to get out of this, now?  In which our heroes become reacquainted in a pub, spend a whole day together that turns into night, and then...? Featuring a minor freakout (Draco), a brand new song (Harry), and affectionate exasperation (all of their friends). Will Draco figure his shit out before Harry gives up? Will Harry survive the Venomous Tentacula? Will Draco ever decide which tea he wants? Will Harry's HooTube commenters ever forgive him for falling in love?

As the Lights is a stark departure from last week's read: Open Fire by Slytherco. With tags like "musician!Harry", "flying teapots", "lots of blushing", and "lots of grinning", you might expect this fic to be super cute and fluffy--and you would be absolutely right! Zezilia gives us just enough angst in this Enemies-to-Friends-to-Lovers story to make the getting together feel genuine and believable without making us doubt for one second that these boys we love so much will end up happily together. Reading this story made me feel so warm and fuzzy that I inhaled it in a day, and I highly recommend you do so as well! In addition to the classic, very gay trope of the "24 hour date" and musician!Harry's smoldering good looks and endearing friendship with Luna (who fronts a band called Luna Lovegood and the Good Loves !!!!!), there are a couple of specific things I want to shout out about this story:

🐣 Draco Malfoy's Journey to Healing His Inner Child Is there another person, real or fictional, who needs to heal their inner child as much as Draco Malfoy?? Arguably Harry James Potter, but when we meet him in this fic he's well on his way. I love how Zezilia skillfully peppers in all these little but significant ways that Draco is trying--consciously and subconsciously--to re-parent himself and to replace all the vicious, unkind voices that have populated his head for so long. His mirror has the voice and personality of someone's doting grandmum, for goodness' sake! But beyond that, we get to witness Draco learning how to allow himself to be earnest, to openly enjoy the things he likes, and to be a little weird! It helps that he has two of the world's best friends, Sophie and Ravi (Zezilia's OCs), to encourage and support him. Honestly, I desperately want a Sophie. It's so gratifying to watch Draco not only love himself for who he really is, but learn that other people will love his true self, too.

🧙🏻‍♂️ The Wonder of the Wizarding World I adore the ways that Zezilia has woven the most magical parts of the wizarding world through this story. The way that they use magic to embellish scenes and complicate the characters lives is so delightful. Whether it's a particularly bawdy painting of a shepherd tending his flock (and other things), the most magical sounding café with Cheering Charm-infused pastries, or a magical park full of animated (and also bawdy!) statues, Zezilia doesn't hold back on the whimsy!

And a bonus: this fic is pro-Hot!Neville, and so am I. So very much.

If you read this (or have read it), let me know what you think!!

*

I Was Recced As The Lights Lift Around Us by @softlystarstruck, so I read:

morning light [victuuri | G | 1.8k]

A cozy winter morning, and a new term of endearment.

Okay, so technically speaking I have read everything Bee has ever written--much of it several times--which means this was a (blissful) re-read for me. I've gushed about my favorite stories Bee has written before (starlight (the unsuccessful return of a runaway prince), to be a bit of warmth (for you), you bring me home, their kinktober 2021 collection, for starters) but I have yet to really rec this one. Since most of my mutuals will be familiar with the way Bee writes our favorite boys, Draco and Harry, I am here to implore you to dig into their Yuri!!! on Ice fics on AO3, even if you aren't familiar with the source material!

Bee takes all the tenderness, care, and intimacy which which they write their Drarry stories and carefully molds it to fit these two lovely, anxious men. What I love most about Bee's writing is that they are able to gently pick up two characters, see right to the heart of them, and then translate all their deepest desires and fears right onto the page in beautiful prose (and sometimes verse!). This means that while morning light feels undeniably "Bee" in its tone, pacing, and use of endearments, the relationship between Viktor and Yuuri is unique and so true to their characters. Viktor (off-screen) is bold and confident and commanding, while Yuuri (everywhere, all the time) is anxious, self-effacing, and unsure. In this close, intimate moment Bee manages to capture all of their facets, allows them to let their guards down, and helps them to grow even closer to one another. This fic is warm, quiet, blushy, and so, so lovely!

Thanks for sending me a recommendation!

[revenge-of-the-shit]

Writing Chinese characters set within Western worlds

If you don’t want to read it on tumblr, go check this out on medium or go follow me on instagram at @annessarose_writes!

Alright. You know what. I’ve seen plenty of stereotypes in fiction (and in social media) that are so incredibly pervasive I’ve seen many Chinese people within the western world internalize it themselves. So here’s a rough guide on writing Chinese characters in an English-speaking Western setting, written by me, a Chinese Canadian woman.

If you’re here to say something racist fuck off. Otherwise, welcome! This is not a comprehensive guide by any means. This is merely a brief overview based on my own experiences. My experience (as someone in North America) will differ from someone living in, say, Europe or South America. I’m not representative of every Chinese person because everyone’s experience is unique. So here were are.

1. Our names

Chinese names are usually written as follows: [family name] [name]. Let’s take a Canadian historical figure as an example: 黃寬先. In Chinese, it’s pronounced “Wong Foon Sien.” On Canadian documents — which are written [First name] [Last name], he’d be called “Foon Sien Wong.” He went by “Foon Sien” for most of his life. That’s his full “first name.” Nobody would call him Foon because that’s just half of his name (unless given permission). It’d be like meeting a stranger called Alex and calling them “Al” right off the bat. Sure, they could go by Al, but you don’t know that.

For those of us living in the Western world, some of us have both a Chinese name and an English name. In these cases, our Chinese name becomes our middle name in English (e.g. a character could be called John Heen-Gwong Lee).

For some people who immigrated to the Western world but were born in China, their legal name would be their Chinese name. Some choose to keep that name. Some choose an English name as their “preferred” name but keep their Chinese name on legal documents. It varies.

2. Parents & Stereotypes

There’s two stereotypes which are so pervasive I see it being used over and over in jokes even within Chinese (and, to a larger extent, asian) communities:

The [abusive] tiger mom and the meek/absent dad

Both parents are unreasonably strict/abusive and they suck

I have yet to see any fiction stories with Chinese parents where they’re depicted as kind/loving/supportive/understanding (if you have recommendations — please do send them my way). Not all Chinese parents are tiger parents. Chinese parents — like all parents — are human. Good god. YES, they’re human! YES, they have flaws! YES, they are influenced by the culture they grew up in!

That isn’t to say there aren’t parents like those tropes. There are. I know this because I grew up in a predominantly Chinese community where I had many a friend’s parent who was like this. Parents who compare their kids to the best kid in class. Parents who force kids into private lessons and competitions that the kid despises because the parents think it’s for the best. Parents who have literally called their kid a disappointment because they didn’t get 100%.

But please, also consider: there’s parents who support their child’s goals and who listen. Not all parents force their kid into the stereotypical trifecta of lawyer/doctor/engineer — I know of a good number who support their child in choosing the path they want. There’s parents who make mistakes and learn and try their best to support their child. So please, for the love of god, if you write a Chinese character, don���t reduce their parents to stereotypes.

3. Language & Learning

When I first read The Son of Neptune by Rick Riordan, I was so excited to see a Chinese Canadian character in Frank Zhang. Finally, there was someone like me. Finally, there was representation in well-known western media.

While I do appreciate that RR added in Frank Zhang, it’s pretty obvious that he didn’t really know how to write a Chinese Canadian character. One of the most glaring examples: in The Son of Neptune, Frank reveals he can’t really read Chinese. In like, the next book (I think — it’s been a while since I read it), Frank is suddenly able to read Chinese because he “learned” it in two week’s time.

Nope. Nuh-uh. Learning Chinese is a pain, let me tell you. There’s thousands of different characters and it is something you need to devote a lot of time to learning (especially if you’re progressed past the best childhood years for learning a language). So if you’re writing about a Chinese character living in the western world, here’s what you need to know:

A character who was born and raised in the western world does not necessarily know how to read/write in Chinese.

If they were raised by their own family, the character would very likely know how to speak their own dialect. They’d be able to understand the language used in movies/TV and they sound like a native speaker, but they may not know how to use language outside of certain contexts (the term for this is heritage speaker).

They probably went to Chinese school. They probably hated it. Chinese school is usually universally hated and does not teach you jack shit other than a hatred for the place and a vague memory of learning how to read the language without actually retaining knowledge of what you learned.

Most of my friends who know how to read/write in Chinese learned from tutors, parents, or were born in China.

There’s two main types of written Chinese: Traditional (used by Cantonese speakers) and Simplified (used by Mandarin speakers).

There are MANY other dialects (which I don’t know much about). The most common ones are Mandarin (usually spoken by people from the mainland), then Cantonese (usually spoken by people from Hong Kong).

4. Fitting into the community

Usually, the story is one of two things: they’re the only Asian kid in the entire school, or they grew up in a predominantly East Asian community. Things to consider for both of these when you’re writing:

Growing up the only Asian kid

They’re “that Asian kid.” They’re different. They walk into a class and feel weird and out of place.

They bring food from home (usually ethnic cuisine) to school. Other classmates stare at it, make fun of it, demand what that strange food is.

“Where are you from?” “Here.” “No, like, where are you really from?”

“Your name is funny.”

People literally never getting the character’s name right.

And that horrible, horrible feeling: wishing that they were white so they could avoid all of this.

Growing up in a predominantly East Asian community

It’s not uncommon for Chinese cuisine to mix with other east Asian cuisines. For special occasions (or just for a casual night out), your character could very well go out to get some sushi, or go for some KBBQ, or get some Vietnamese noodles.

Screaming “AIYAA” at/with their friends unironically if they’re annoyed (I’ve done this a lot with Cantonese friends. Less so with Mandarin friends).

Slipping into Chinese for like, two words, during a mostly-English conversation to talk about food or some other topic that can’t be adequately conveyed in English.

Reading books by white authors and learning about white history and growing up thinking white names, white books, and white history is the norm and standard even though the community is surrounded by East Asian people.

When the character leaves this community, there’s a brief culture shock when they realize how sheltered they’ve been.

Things in common for both of these:

The character has grown up on ethnic cuisine. Yes, Chinese people do eat rice with many of our meals. Yes, boba (bubble) tea is extremely popular. No, rice isn’t the only thing we eat. No, not all Chinese people love boba (though as a Chinese person I admit this sounds sacrilegious to say…)

The character likely grew up watching film/TVthat originates from East Asia. It’s not uncommon to watch Studio Ghibli films. It’s not uncommon to watch Japanese or Korean shows with canto/mando dub (examples: Ultraman, Kamen Rider). If you want to see a classic Chinese film from Hong Kong that’s fucking hilarious, watch Kung Fu Hustle.

The character has felt or been told that they’re “too westernized to be Chinese, but too Chinese to fit into the western world.” They’re torn between the two.

5. General portrayal

It’s quite simple, really. We’re human. We’re regular people. We have regular hobbies like all people do. We’re good at some subjects and bad at others. We have likes and dislikes like all people do. So here’s a list of stereotypes you can avoid.

STEREOTYPES TO AVOID BECAUSE WE’RE REGULAR HUMANS AND WE DON’T FIT INTO A SINGLE COOKIE CUTTER SHAPE, DAMMIT.

The character is a maths whiz and perfect at all things STEM.

The character is a straight-A+ gifted/IB/AP student.

The character is the next coming of Mozart and is amazing at piano/violin.

The character’s free time is spent only studying.

The character is insanely good at martial arts.

The character is either meek and submissive or an explosive, dangerous force.

I’m not going to mention the other stereotypes. You know, those ones. The really obvious ones that make fun of and demonize (sometimes through multiple untruths) how we look and how we live our lives. You should know.

Of course, there are people who fit into one or more of these. That’s not the point. The point is: molding all Chinese characters to these stereotypes (which white media tends to do) is harmful and reductionist. We’re more than stereotypes.

—

6. Conclusion

We need more diversity in portrayal of Chinese characters. Reducing us into one-dimensional caricatures has done nothing but harm us — look at what’s happening now. This guide is by no means comprehensive, but I hope it has helped you by providing a quick overview.

If you want to accurately portray Chinese characters, do your research. Read Chinese fiction. Watch Chinese films/TV. Initiate a conversation with the community. Portray us accurately. Quit turning us into caricatures.

[the-insomniac-emporium]

I love your writing.

if it's not too much trouble may i make a request? I'm thinking the Dimitrescu women meeting and/or courting a fellow immortal.

the circumstances of the immortal's powers and possession of immorality are entirely up to you. I just like the idea of them meeting someone they could literally spend forever with...because they deserve it ❤

I wasn't sure if you wanted a story or headcanons? I went with HCs, here, but if you wanted more of a drabble or whatever just lemme know and I'll write something like that.

Also, I got excited and carried away so this has the whole Dimitrescu family, plus shorter ones for both Mother Miranda and Donna. Admittedly Alcina's is also a little on the shorter side? I tried to write everything that came to mind, but I am kinda tired right now, sorry. Might reblog this and add some more later.

(Under read-more for length)

Cassandra:

Tries (and fails) to hide her excitement. Mortality is one of the bigger things that has made her keep her distance to others, at least in the past. Every Maiden she’s ever been the slightest bit smitten with, up until this point, has been incredibly fragile. Seeing as she’s not exactly the softest person, one can easily imagine why that would be a turn off for her. But now that’s no longer a problem!

On the other had… having an immortal partner gives Cassandra pause. Why? Because what if they breakup? Normally, she can just, ahem, “dispose” of any exes (regardless of how much it hurts) so she doesn’t have to see them/deal with them anymore. If that’s not an option, she’ll definitely take longer than usual to do anything about her feelings. She wants to be sure, 100%, before she gets in over her head. Chances are she won’t hold back for as long as she wants though.

Likely to have a loud, messy confession. She’ll have been avoiding you for a few days, always ducking out of whatever rooms you enter, leaving you both hurt and confused. After enlisting the help of her sisters, you’ll be able to corner her outside. She’ll tell you, under no uncertain circumstances, to leave her alone. But you’ll refuse, demanding an explanation.

“I thought we had something. I thought you cared,” you’ll snap, eyes watering. “If that’s changed… if I was wrong, just tell me. I’ll leave and I’ll never come back.” Cue thunder and raining (because tropes) and Cassandra dramatically pulling you into a kiss, holding you so tightly you think you might bruise. Then she’s demanding that you stay, refusing to apologize but making it clear just how much she does care.

Being immortal, you’re not as defenseless as some of Cassandra’s past interests. Naturally, she doesn’t get quite as protective as she normally would. She’ll still have your back no matter what, ready to fight by your side against any foe, and will probably consider doing so a “fun bonding activity”. Oh, some lycans are encroaching on Dimitrescu territory? Time to go destroy them, as a power couple!

Despite having all the time in the world, Cassandra won’t change much of her actual courting behavior, nor the rate at which things advance. She’s still gonna get handsy fairly early on, still gonna “rah!” at you in the hallways, and still going to struggle with her jealousy.

Immortality Compatibility: I can see Cassandra going for another vampire (or vampire adjacent) creature, or someone demonic. She likes her lovers a bit rough, with some nice bite to their personalities. If you’ve got sharp teeth, or claws, or glowing eyes? Oh boy, she’s gonna be making heart eyes at you all the time.

Bela:

If your immortality isn’t immediately obvious, Bela is over the moon with joy when she finds out. Her eyes will go wide for a moment, before she tries to seem calm (so as to not freak you out), but her heart is pounding. This is what she’s been hoping for. As much as Mother Miranda has done for her family, there’s no guarantee that she’d be willing to give more. Even if Miranda granted Bela’s lover her “gift”, there was no telling what the results would be, or if the lover would survive. Now that there’s no need for such a transformation, it’s far easier for Bela to imagine herself in love (and eventually be in love).

Slow-burn romance over a decade or longer, oops. Doesn’t even necessarily mean to take things so slowly, just doesn’t feel a need to rush things, preferring that they develop organically. With both of you having unlimited time, you’re both used to working on a very large timescale. Maidens watching the two of you probably place bets on how long it’ll take you to hold hands for the first time. Everyone knows it’s coming, but no matter how much Cassandra and Daniela complain, Bela refuses to jump into things. By the time the two of you are officially together, you’re probably madly in love with each other.

More protective than Cassandra, if only because she knows just how rare you are. Immortal or not, you likely still have a weakness, and Bela will do everything in her power to make sure no one else knows what it is. If applicable, she will also ensure she has a countermeasure readily available. For example: If you were weak to fire, she’d make sure that the castle keeps extinguishers handy, just in case. Though they should probably already do that. Not that the Dimitrescu family cares much for OSHA compliance.

Somehow grows more in love with you with every passing year, and makes sure that you know this. Whether you’ve been together for one year or one century (because in this house we ignore canon), she’s always performing little acts of love, giving constant reminders of how strongly she feels. Gifts, special dates, book recommendations, etc.

Immortality Compatibility: Bela seems like the type to go for someone with a calming presence, and perhaps somewhat of a contrast to herself. I can picture her with someone somewhat angelic, or druidic, someone very in tune with nature. She’d love to feed deer with you and relax in the forest! Or lay against a tree by your side, listening to you talk about various microorganisms for hours at a time.

Daniela:

Practically tackles you when she finds out/connects the dots. This is just like one of her romance novels, where a lonely (attractive as fuck) immortal spends years in isolation before finally meeting the love of their life, who they get to spend the rest of eternity with. Absolutely ecstatic about the whole situation. Won’t stop kissing you and pulling you close, rambling about how great it’s gonna be to spend your lives together. Honestly? Kind of overwhelming. You might have to remind her a few times that you don’t have to rush into things, considering you have all the time in the world.

Introduces you to people as her “super cool/rad immortal life partner”. Genuinely cannot bring herself to not brag about you. If her sisters haven’t found someone like you yet, you can bet that Daniela will tease them about it all the time (much to their annoyance). If Momma Alcina doesn’t, though? Dani will keep her thoughts to herself, thank you very much (being grounded at her age does not impress the s/o).

Tries not to show it, but she’s actually very nervous. You’re immortal! You’ve probably seen a lot of shit (she certainly has)! Worries about keeping you interested in her, though she would never admit it. This tends to lead to her performing ridiculous acts to showcase her affection, regardless of the cost or, like, whether or not you’d even enjoy whatever she has planned. In order to counter her anxiety, you’ll want to reassure her whenever you can, and give her plenty of “I love you”s.

Strikes a decent balance between Cassandra’s nonchalant attitude and Bela’s protectiveness. Will defend you if you need it, playing up the romantic aspect, but also entirely willing to hide behind you in a scary situation.

Immortality Compatibility: Having probably read Twilight… Dani would date a werewolf, as long as they weren’t the smelly kind. Also interested in a sort of “magical”/elemental type, especially if their powers are influenced by emotions. In other words, if someone flirts with her in front of you, and your response is to subconsciously light your hands/the other person on fire? She thinks that’s hot, pun intended.

Alcina:

“Oh? Interesting,” she’d say, smiling softly (and trying to ignore the heat rushing to her face). Similarly to Cassandra, she’d try to play it off, not wanting to seem too excited. And, well, she’s not as excited as any of her daughters are. After all, she’s had more time than them to “get used” to the idea of outliving any potential romantic interests. So, she’s not exactly desperate for a relationship, even with someone she could spend an eternity with.

That being said, if she is romantically interested in them, she’s very relieved. Outliving a loved one can be incredibly traumatizing (fuck you c*pcom, you know what you did), and knowing that you’re safe (or at least safer than most) brings her no small amount of comfort.

Also, just glad to have another person close to her age around. Her daughters are somewhat stuck as young adults, and I imagine Alcina would want someone who gained immortality a little later in life, such as herself, as opposed to, ya know, reminding her of her children. That probably goes without saying. Hopefully.

More so than her daughters, Alcina would change her level of protectiveness depending on her s/o’s power level. If you’re a shapeshifter who can also turn into a big ass dragon? Then she’s not going to coddle you. If you’re immortal but still vulnerable, then she’s going to do her best to keep you safe, even going so far as to enlist the assistance of her daughters. “If you see a single Maiden growing mistletoe, or bringing some in from the village, let me know immediately,” or something like that, depending on your weakness.

Immortality Compatibility: Definitely would want someone in a situation similar to herself, having once been truly human, only to be “elevated” by something. Bonus points if you’re another disciple of Miranda, double bonus points if Miranda specifically “made” you to be Alcina’s boo/honey/darling/dear.

Bonus! Mother Miranda:

Oh god finally someone who won’t leave her (can’t leave her). No one can take you away from her, and that’s a relief that she’s been craving for over a century. Even if romance isn’t high on her priority list, she welcomes it with open arms, glad to have someone by her side through all of life’s chaos.

Admittedly slow to trust at first, probably just using you as a tool at first. But prove yourself enough, show that your devotion is more than just misdirected self-interest, and she’ll start to warm up to you. Forming a real relationship would likely take a couple decades, similar to with Bela. Once you are together, however, the two of you are inseparable in all matters.

You’d be her #1 follower, most trusted adviser, and the only person allowed to understand 100% of her thoughts and motives. While Miranda wouldn’t allow you to be seen as the same level as her (sorry), you’d still be a legend among the villagers. To them, you’re Mother Miranda’s champion, the epitome of a devoted follower that they all aspire to emulate. Not that they know the two of you are a couple, though.

Immortality Compatibility: No gimmicks, no cheap tricks, she wants (and respects) a fellow scientist, someone who clawed their way through adversity and forged themselves into something indestructible. Double the interest if you did so for a similar cause to her own, as she would appreciate your ability to relate to her suffering.

Bonus! Donna:

Someone to play with! FOREVER! No more losing people she cares about, no more accidentally breaking people, no more people scrambling to leave. Now that she has you, she can finally spend some quality time with another (living?) person. Honestly her dolls (or at least Angie) are just as excited as she is. Regardless of her relations with the other three Lords, Donna much prefers the company of a lover.

For real though she’s shy as hell and you might not even realize who’s pulling the strings until you’ve been in her house for over a year. She’d probably use her powers to trap you inside, at least at first, though they’d be nice hallucinations. You’d have to treat the dolls nicely, especially Angie, before she’d let you interact with her.

Eventually you’d be allowed to leave, and you’d be given a key to return whenever you wanted to. Assuming that you do, in fact, come back, the two of you would have a very, very slow romance, if only because of Donna’s anxiety. Hand holding makes both of your faces turn beet red, seriously.

Immortality Compatibility: *chanting* GHOST GIRLFRIEND GHOST GIRLFRIEND POLTERGEIST PARTNER POLTERGEIST PARTNER WOOHOO! Something with a flexible, only-sometimes-tangible form, who absolutely could have left at any time but didn’t because they wanted to stay.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

Sept 2021 Wk 5

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Don’t Say No Ep 9 (Line) - It’s my corny af hurt/comfort soap opera that I watch at 1.5x and skip all the sex scenes and Fiat crying, but I like it that way, so there. Yes I am one of those people who only eats the outside of the peanut M&Ms, why do you ask? Episode recaps here. 

Bite Me Ep 5 (Viu & Viki) - sometimes I feel like this show is skipping all the important bits, or having them occur off screen intentionally, like some ancient Greek play. Still, the depth of the feeling understood between the two leads is clearly transferred to us despite that. Are they dating? Sure seems that way. Without anything being actually said about it. It’s oddly magical. I talked a bit about the north/south divide and food as a love language with regards to kao soi in this post. 

7 Project Ep 5 The Breakup Zone (iQiYi & YouTube) - another het installment, so I skipped it. Nash. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Peach of Time Ep 10 fin - A Korean BL (maybe not BL tho) featuring Thai talent that really went beyond a lot of tropes into interesting territory and allegory in a way only Korea does. I hope we get more collabs like this, perhaps happier than this one next time? RECOMMENDED only if you are prepared for The Sad. Because it is quite sad.  

x Friend or Lover (YouTube) Ep 6 - still waiting on the final of this Taiwanese indie series.  

Love is Science? (BL sub plot on Viki) Ep 14 (aired ep 15) - Taiwanese drama finally got subbed yesterday, so those of us who are waiting seem to be on a week’s delay. The BL couple actually has the most interesting story arc and the most unusual character growth. I’m enjoying how unpredictable these two are. Honestly, they could have gotten their own series with this much story - and now I really want that for after the baby comes. I’m a little sad we didn’t get the coming out in the skate park sequence (LOOK I love coming out drama, especially with sporty friends, it’s a THING), but I also get why the writers are doing what they are with these boys. And the actors sure can handle it. Taiwan at it’s finest.  

Love Is the series (YouTube) Ep 5 - continues to be fine for a V-BL but not all that actually good. 

See You After Quarantine? (Viki) Ep 6, 7 - Taiwanese gameboys with Japanese talent stuck in, what more could we ask? AND THEN they gave us some *thirsty boi* action, great kisses, and charmed the pants off... well... everyone. Taiwan, we don’t deserve you. Honestly, you spoil us. Turns out Aaron Lai is the best wingman any gay Japanese man in quarantine could ask for. Everyone should be watching this. It’s utterly charming. 

The Tasty Florida (Viki) Ep 3 & 4 - this Korean BL so fucking cute. Look it’s formless and too short but simultaneously aching and kinda special-sweet. But Korea has got to settle into something a bit longer for their BL for everyone’s sake. It’s time. Light On Me proved it was possible. I’m not asking for much, just 15 min+ of fresh content with at least a 10 ep arc. 

In Case You Missed It

Someone dropped K-BL movie cut of 2015′s The Lover series onto YouTube. The series was about 4 different couples all living in the same apartment complex, one of the 4 was a BL plot about a sunshine sweetie Japanese tourist who ends up roommates with a hot shy tsundere Korean boy. It’s 1.5 hours, proving Korea and stretch its BL when it wants to. 

Read more about it here. 

GOSSIP!

Rumors of OhmFluke to star in new Thai BL Oh! My Sunshine Night. It’s from Newsinfinity Entertainment who announced the casting and showed the couple in workshops. This is this (small) production house’s first BL and they aim to “appeal to to general audiences* with a “broader view of BL that everyone will watch.” Which is code for LOW heat, light gay, soft boys. If this happens I think we can expect this to be Thailand doing Korean-style BL. 

* GENERAL AUDIENCE? Let’s be clear no piece of media will EVER appeal to everyone. Here is the USA “general audience” is code for “families with socially conservative values and children who are still minors” AKA what used to be prime time TV watchers AKA suburbia. 

 The concept is analytically old fashioned and so fractured at this juncture (socially economically spatially politically) that “general audience” is actually impossible to target and it doesn’t really exist. But try telling that to the publicity department. 

We also call this the “Disney live action demo.” (Think Pirates of the Caribbean.) I occasionally refer to them as “the Simpsons.” And they’re about as realistic. All that to say I am VERY suspicious of Oh! My Sunshine Night‘s production house. 

To My Star does seem to be getting a second season, same director, same mains. Korea is much better about executing on its promises than Thailand, but until I see proof of filming or an honest trailer, my favorite boys are staying in the gossip section. I don’t wanna get my hopes up. (Honestly now, how many of you also want an alt reality with these two as a couple but Kim Kang Min playing his long suffering cardiologist intern character from Hospital Playlist? Just me?) 

I reported on Unforgotten Night a while ago. It seems to have been fully cast now, I still think the publicity stills make it look like a joke. But with this line-up I guess it’s even more of an alt answer to KinnPorsche. 

You know that thing that happens in media when suddenly we get multiples of the same style of movie or show at once? It’s now happening with BL. Love triangles. Restaurants. And now mafia. 

Cutie Pie (our arranged marriage Thai BL staring Zee) dropped some wardrobe fitting photo ops. Also... fancy pants sexy suits that fit, so that’s exciting. 

Starting Soon

My Mate Match from Starhunter should be starting on Line TV next Saturday. Usually, Line has subs relatively quickly and is available internationally. However the fact that the trailer is not subbed and the show is not listed on Line’s site has me nervous. No idea on length of run either. 

Starhunter studio doesn’t have a great track record in general for narrative arcs and this one is not based on a y-novel so could get waffly. This is a roommates love triangle BL about a boy who is looking for one roommate and ends up with two vying for his home and his heart. Stars Jet as the uke lead which I’m pretty happy about as he’s got great comedic timing and is accustomed to BL. He’s opposite two friends/co-actors from Gen Y and other projects, so we know they’re comfortable with each other. They could do great things... if they get a decent script. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Some shows may be listed later than actual air date for International subs accessibility reasons.

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.

This week’s best moment?

[roonilwazlibimagines]

What are some of your scenarios to fall asleep to? 👀

Ahhhh I’m glad you asked !! Also please feel free to share some of yours they can be specific or vague idc I’m in desperate need

I will be going into heavy detail because I can’t help myself I’m sorry and I will put in both normal ones and Harry Potter ones

Also this is just like one big ramble I’m sorry I got too excited I literally turned into that Tik tok sound where it’s like ‘you’re asking me about my theories? I’ve waited years for someone to ask me about my theories’

Update - I think I’m just going to keep updating this as well when I think of new ones because I keep forgetting some

My most recent one is a royalty one where they’re like royalty but in their really prestigious and royal school they were academic rivals and did not get along and after school they like try to go their separate ways until a couple years later their parents force them into an arranged marriage for like the good of the country or whatever I don’t really care!! You can take it wherever you want from there but in case you were interested in mine he fell for her first and kinda gave up on the enemies thing pretty early on but she still made it clear he wasn’t her favourite person and she despised the situation and there is still constant teasing until she meets his sister or friend or whoever who says that they can’t believe how happy he is with them and she feels so bad because she thinks he deserves better and ends up being much meaner to him because she’s an idiot who can’t express her emotions and he gets angry at her because she’s being super mean after they were just starting to get along and they have a big argument and are forced to talk about their feelings and then I can never decide whether they actually like each other when they get married, I feel like either way is fun

I have a thing for royalty so my other one is literally just princess x stable boy and you can honestly take that wherever you want but I will tell you where I took it for some ✨inspiration✨ so I don’t have my drivers license and get really bad driving anxiety so I self projected and made her terrified of riding horses right (I’m so smart I know) and he is like trying to help her ride the horse and feel comfortable and like obviously they end up in love but I created drama because she sneaks out to his birthday party (!!) but his friends don’t like her because they just think she’ll be a snob but he obviously defends her but like it’s a perfect opportunity for a bit of an innocent princess as well

My personal favourite is the two co stars falling in love and like thinking about doing all those stupid interviews from like buzzfeed and all that and I personally love the trying foods from different places thing (like making them try fairy bread - because I’m from Australia and we aren’t that cultured and being mad when they don’t like it because it is my favourite food) and it’s great because i can make the guy any actor I am currently obsessed with 😭 but also like the red carpet opportunities and interviews and fan reactions and it’s very fun also this keeps my brain very busy because I like making it as realistic as possible and figuring out the actors timeline so I can match the story up with it, it’s always really intense, also if you want inspiration for what moving they’re staring in I always go for the live action version of tangled even if I don’t look anything like rapunzel

Another fun one is where one of them is in a band and you have a friend who is dating one of the other members but you don’t like the band and you’re not shy in letting the other members know that and it turns into an enemies to lovers thing but I haven’t really developed it because halfway through I ended up changing it with the fact that they befriend one of the members and like fall for them but the band member like ‘gets around’ and it makes them jealous until they drunkingly confess it made them jealous this one’s a bit of a mess and is tipping into a 2012 wattpad story but it was how I got back into my 5sos phase two years ago because I felt icky about them but I’m still a slut for Calum 😭

Another one I love is moving abroad to study or whatever (idk I just always need a reason to be in America/Uk because there’s no one here in australia) and you make friends with someone who turns out to be related to someone really famous (insert whoever you want) and you meet them and you think they’re the hottest person you’ve ever seen and you get drunk to gain confidence to talk to them and you’re like unashamedly flirting with them and they think it’s cute and you’re funny but the whole little plot twist is that you don’t know they’re famous (famous people love that, trust me, I have about 10 wattpad stories in my library that can prove this) !! And the don’t believe you don’t know they’re famous !! Anyways I took it in a sugar daddy direction but each to their own!

Specifically for Harry Potter though, you ask?

Currently I am obsessed with Regulus Black and for about the past two weeks I’ve been obsessed with the idea of James potter sibling x regulus black enemies to lovers story and then about a week ago I found an actually good wattpad story about it?!?! (I have recommended it here with warnings but I really encourage you to read it if you’re not a minor) but you can also do your own version because I am still doing my own version and will continue to do my own version tonight even if I am obsessed with the wattpad one !! Currently I am up to post Hogwarts and her and regulus are trying to defeat Voldemort and regulus tells her that Peter is going to betray James and so ofc she tells James but James is like ‘how to do you even know this??’ And he is so afraid and gets angry at her and it’s really dramatic and she tells him she’s dating regulus and then he gets super mad at her because she’s dating like one of the most well known and loyal death eaters (even if regulus is sneakily trying to destroy Voldemort) and because he didn’t tell her and it’s very dramatic

My favourite Sirius black idea is also a James potters sibling one, but I never have any good ideas for it and just end up self projecting so if anyone has any ideas, I am begging you, please tell me !!!

My other Sirius black one is one I’ve been working on for like the last 4 years of my life and I probably should write it but who knows, but basically it’s a 10 things I hate about you x Harry Potter story where reader is about a year or so older than the marauders and she is like Kat Stratford (for people who haven’t watched it the best way to describe her is just an angry early 2000s feminist who is like anti dating and fun (kinda)) but she is Lily Evans sister!! And so Lily gets fed up of James constantly asking her out and makes an offhand comment that she’ll date him when her sister goes on a date with someone and James is like really?!? And Lily is like ‘sure’ because she knows her sister will never date anyone at Hogwarts so James tells the marauders and Remus is like ‘if anyone can take her on a date, it’s Sirius’ and Sirius is like ‘no, I’m stupid but not that stupid’ and James is like ‘please I’ll pay you’ and Sirius is easily bribed so he tries to get her to go on a date with him and like she doesn’t until she does and then finds out he only did it because James paid him but then they fall in love? Basically just 10 things I hate about you lol

My next one is with Draco Malfoy and all it is is that reader comes from a pure blood family and they’ve known each other since they were babies and it’s like basically destined they get married but she gets like really upset when he gets the mark which makes for a good cuddling and crying scene and like idk people are probably more creative than me but I just like reimagining scenes from hp but with this new character so like Poa when she gets angry at him about buckbeak or the bathroom scene (maybe she duels Harry?) and she’s so upset about Draco and comforts him, or helping him in sixth year and comforting him or the quidditch scene in the fifth book (weird note, but I’ve always headcannoned that my original character finds out about dumbledores army but doesn’t say anything and like the da knows she knows but she doesn’t tell Draco or maybe Draco finds out and gets angry at her?)

My other one is another Draco malfoy one where James and Lily live and she’s Harry’s younger sister (and Voldemort isn’t a thing) but like there’s still stereotypes and beliefs and such and like it’s obviously enemies to lovers and maybe they get prefect duties together ? (I am a sucker for this trope in Harry Potter) but then when they do date they try to hide it but Harry finds out but doesn’t say anything until they get into a fight at home and he is like ‘well at least I’m not fucking Draco malfoy behind everyone’s back) (in my head they aren’t fucking because they’re still in Hogwarts but you get the idea) and James and Lily are just like ‘WHAT?!’ Like idk I just think it’s funny imagining James and Lily finding out their kid is dating Draco and Lucius and narcissus finding out Draco is dating a potter - so many possibilities!

Update 6.10.21

I also have one for Charlie Weasley !! And basically you’re friends with the twins and like you go your whole Hogwarts life with the biggest crush on Charlie but like he low key doesn’t even know who you are and you want to become a healer and then after Hogwarts there is a position in Romania and you take it because you know Charlie’s there and at first he is like hmmm I think I know you and you explain you’re friends with the twins and obviously he falls in love with you I also took it in a nsfw direction where it’s like major innocence kink because Charlie is just such a dom to me and he like teaches you everything but he makes sure you’re happy and safe and it’s not really like serious sex you’re both just having fun and he kinda introduces you to dom/sub dynamics but you can do whatever is most comfortable

[neon-green-reagent]

Found Footage Films that Find My Footage

Oh, found footage. The most maligned of all sub-genres. I’m here to tell you there’s a lot of gold here that people don’t seem aware of. Because they’re not willing to dig. Like any other storytelling trope or trick of the trade, found footage can be used to make great things or terrible things. I’m gonna help you find the cream with this list. 

Obvious good ones we all know about: The Blair Witch Project, The Last Exorcism, Grave Encounters, The Houses October Built,  As Above So Below, and Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon. Watch those if you haven’t. Now let’s get into the stuff that might be a little more buried. 

Mr. Jones | Found footage gets a lot of mileage out of folk horror. Probably because mixing technology with it and showing how folk horrors are stronger than tech feels just right to scare an audience full of people with smart phones in their pockets. In this case, it’s used in an especially effective way. When you get to the part of the movie where you’re asking yourself, “who could possibly be filming this?” KEEP WATCHING. That’s part of the bit that will explode your brains. 

The Final Prayer (AKA The Borderlands) | Found footage also lives and breathes on twists. This one is quite the kiss to the old chef. The turn it takes that fully explains the extent of the shit these people have gotten themselves in... Well, I dare you not to have an existential crisis about the infinitesimal nature of man a la Lovecraft. 

Devil’s Due | I love possession movies and Rosemary’s Baby knockoffs. Throw in some found footage, and you’ve got yourself a winner in my book. This one in particular makes excellent use of the format. Some of the effects they use look especially incredible when you’re viewing them from a first person perspective, and it becomes a kind of roller coaster spectacle. 

Noroi: The Curse | What if you want a slow burn? Something that feels like an investigatory documentary. Where someone’s pursuit of the truth at all costs makes them slowly become the center of a horrifying story. One which, as more details are revealed, becomes increasingly sickening and foreboding. Nothing will fill you with dread the way this movie does. If this were a structured list, it would be number one. If you don’t watch anything else, please watch this one. 

The McPherson Tape | People thought this was real. Does that feel a little ridiculous? I won’t say it doesn’t in hindsight, but I love that this has the distinction of being a film that was circulated as a true, caught-on-tape case of alien abduction. Enjoy how kitch that is, please. Also, if you like it, watch Alien Abduction (2014). It has a bigger budget, but it plays on the same fears. 

V/H/S Series | All of them. Every movie. Not necessarily every segment, but each movie has at least one segment that blows the doors clean off. Some of them have more than one, and that’s truly a gift. There’s way too much to cover here other than to say some of the wildest examples of found footage I’ve experienced are in this quadrilogy. I recommend WNUF Halloween Special if you’ve already exhausted this series, because it has the same, good vibes.  

Searching | No one talks about this one, but it’s an example of excellent creativity. We follow a search for a missing person via webcams, chats, phone calls, and files on laptops. The information we receive is sporadic and colored by heavy bursts of emotion. The way it would really be if you couldn’t find a loved one and were on a desperate search. 

Hell House LLC | Do you like Grave Encounters? I do, too, but this one’s slightly better. Because it doesn’t blow its wad or show its hand too much. It holds back a lot. The scares are minimalist, with things moving when you aren’t looking. Someone suddenly being in the corner when they weren’t before. But it has you checking every frame of the film, gasping at sudden movement, and feeling paranoid as fuck. Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum is a Korean version of this kind of movie that I call “hubris-filled assholes go into an obviously haunted place and play games with demons that could eat them for breakfast.” Highly entertaining.

1974: La Posesión de Altair | I want to explain the fascinating thing this film made me realize, but I can’t without spoiling it. There’s a twist that happens right at the end of this film, revealing that what we thought was happening was a different kind of attack all along. And it bent my mind in a wonderful way. I love twists that rewire the entire movie in hindsight, and this is a great one. 

Apollo 18 | And last but not least, the hill I will be dying on. This movie is good. Shut up. It’s good. What if there was a final journey to the moon, but things went SO SIDEWAYS, it was hidden from the public? This is that mission. And sideways it does go. Moon rocks will never be the same for me. 

I have not watched every found footage film. I still have a lot I want to get to. But this is a solid list of personal favorites for the moment. 

[lunabonita]

My Webtoon Recommendations

These are webtoons that are all 10/10 for me. Of course it doesn’t have to be a 10/10 for you, so just a reminder, do not attack me for liking a webtoon that you do not. These are my opinions and we are not going to have the exact same taste. Please be respectful.

Your Throne

Genre: Fantasy

Chapters: 75

Status: Ongoing

-

“Tensions are brewing under the seemingly calm surface of the Vasilios Empire, a kingdom ruled by the Imperial Family and the Temple. Lady Medea Solon has lost her place next to Crown Prince Eros, but resolves to win back whats rightfully hers. Will she reclaim her throne?”

You know whats amazing about this webtoon? The summary leads you to think that what shes winning back is the prince. Wrong. Shes trying to win back the throne. I love how this webtoon doesn’t try to make it a girl focusing her goals on a man, but on power. Medea is such a strong and well written character that you can’t help but love her.

The second protagonist Pschye, who of which is the person who took Medeas place as Crown Princess, is the complete opposite of Medea. At the beginning you hate her, but as the webtoon goes on and Medea and her get a better understanding of eachother due to them switching bodies as a wish from God, you begin to root for them as they team up to take over the throne from the Crown Prince.

The art is so beautiful and I constantly found myself at awe from the amount of detail put into it.

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The Makeup Remover

Genre: Romace

Chapters: 78

Status: Ongoing

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“After years of being told to focus on studying, Yeseul feels lost when she starts college and is suddenly expected to pay attention to makeup. When a chance encounter with brilliant makeup artist Yuseong leads to her taking part in a televised makeup competition, Yeseul begins to question the role that makeup and appearance play in society.”

This was created by one of my favorite webtoon creators Lee Yone. Their art is just so amazing and their stories always include such good topics.

For instance, The Makeup Remover’s theme is loving yourself for who you are. It shows how people treat you based on your looks and as someone whos struggled with that kind of thing for a while, this webtoon really touched me. The main character Yeseul is such a relatable character, even when trying to reject beauty standards, she still came subject to the pressures of living up to the people around her. She struggles with trying to love her own appearance and I really like that this webtoon didn’t try to be like, ‘fuck the beauty standard im better than that screw pretty people!!!’ it actually showed realistically how people struggle with self-image. I also love the main love interest because oh my god, we need more men like him please. He doesn’t care about Yeseul’s appearance and genuinely loves her for her personality.

Also, art is amazing. The author is so talented and you should support them by reading and liking the chapters.

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Surviving Romance

Genre: Horror

Chapters: 14

Status: Ongoing

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“When Chaerin Eun becomes the protagonist of the romance novel she is reading, she expects a fairytale ending with the novel’s love interest, Jeha. But when a bizarre twist makes her realize the story is not playing out as it does in the book, she’ll need the help of an unlikely character from her class to defy the new storyline and find her happy ending - if only she can figure out who this ‘Unknown Extra’ is first!”

Hands down one of my favorite webtoons by a long shot. You ever see a webtoon and think, ‘oh yeah, thats going to be a good webtoon’? Thats how this webtoon was for me. It was so good that I spent hours searching for other chapters that hadn’t been uploaded to webtoon yet on other manhua websites. I discovered it because it was also by the author of ‘The Makeup Remover’.

If there is one thing you need to know about me, its that I am a huge horror fan. So when I saw that my favorite author on webtoon had a horror themed webtoon out? You bet your behind that I binged it. Let me tell you, best choice ever.

Think of it as if ‘Ino’s Law’ and ‘Quarantine’ were combined with amazing art and a badass MC.

The Remarried Empress

I love how it is set up to the point where she cannot ‘quit’ until she completes the novel. Creating scenarios where she must survive while meeting the standards in the book. It is such an amazingly written webtoon and I cannot wait for more chapters to be released.

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Genre: Fantasy

Chapters: 82

Status: Ongoing

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“Navier Ellie Trovi was an empress perfect in every way - intelligent, courageous, and socially adept. She was kind to her subjects and devoted to her husband. Navier was perfectly content to live the rest of her days as the wise empress of the Eastern Empire. That is, until her husband brought hone a mistress and demanded a divorce. ‘I accept this divorce… And i request an approval of my remarriage.’ In a shoking twist Navier remaarries another emperor and retains her title and childhood dream as empress. But just how did everything unfold? “

Am I in love with Navier? Yes.

I absolutely adore how this story was set up. The first chapter begins with the big divorce scene, followed by Navier saying that she was going to be remarrying someone else since he wants to divorce her. This sets up a picture that gets completely shattered as you read the chapters. How everything falls into place with the reason behind the divorce and the remarriage is just so well written. The art is so good and and everything is just so insanely well done.

I absolutely love Naviers character, from her regalness and devoted loyalty to her role as empress, all the way to her petty moments and times of sadness. She is truly a character that you want the best for, and I cannot image anyone not liking her. Also the story is just so capable of making you feel emotions. I’ve laughed, cried, and got angry during the course of reading this webtoon. I love how betrayed I felt when the emperor brought home his mistress. It felt like I was in Navier’s shoes!

This is such a well done webtoon and I'm so excited for Navier to get all of the good things she deserves in her new Kingdom and with her new husband.

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Witch Creek Road

Genre: Horror

Chapters: 74

Status: Ongoing

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“A survival horror about love, acceptance, death, and revenge. And sexy flesh-eating demons. Yeah, it has those, too.”

This series seriously mind fucked me. The way that this story is set up, you don’t see the full picture until the later chapters. Season two literally blew my mind. It is also very gorey so keep that in mind if you don’t like that kind of stuff, but for me that makes it all the better. It is just so wild and crass that you can feel your heart pumping in anticipation.

They even have their own website that goes further into the lore because it’s just so wild. Also the art style is just so amazing, because it complements the story and horror theme so much. You hate most of the characters because they suck, and it is so satisfying when they are killed. Also it has it’s sad moments but I think it is a nice break from the horror so it isn’t so overwhelmingly scary.

I binged this series and I recommend reading only a few chapters a day so you don’t overload your brain.

Other then that, an amazing webtoon. Seriously, go read it, support the author, so much work goes into the story and art that it’s insane.

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Dating With A Tail

Genre: Romance

Chapters: 36

Status: Ongoing

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“On the dawn of her 29th birthday, unlucky-in-love Yunha discovers a shocking family secret: she’s started growing a fox tail, the mark of an ancestral curse. She must find her fated love before her 30th birthday or she is destined to become a fox forever! Even with her new-found enchanting power to attract men using her scent, will one year be enough to break the curse before it’s too late?”

Oh my gosh this is just such a good webtoon. It has amazing art, story telling, and characters. The true love interest was there the whole time, the villain isn’t who you’d expect it to be, and the spirit who cursed her is just! Im not going to spoil it but go read this webtoon!! It is so good and deserves more love.

Also Yunha is just so relatable?? Like she put off finding the woodcutter (her fated love) for 29 years and waited last minute to find him. Homegirl is me trying to do a project for school. Also to get rid of the scent that makes men attracted to her, she just starts eating a ton of garlic and that is just so funny to me.

Also I would go to church for the priest anytime if you know what i mean ;)

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Omniscient Reader

Genre: Action

Chapters: 53

Status: Ongoing

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“Dokja was an average office worker whose sole interest was reading his favorite web novel ‘Three Ways to Survive the Apocalypse.’ But when the novel suddenly becomes reality, he is the only person who knows how the world will end. Armed with this realization, Dokja uses his understanding to change the course of the story, and the world, as he knows it.”

I cannot get over how high quality this story is. The world building is phenomenal, the art is fantastic, and the characters are very fleshed out. This deserved all the hype it has gotten so far and more.

I love the ‘mc thrown into a different reality’ trope so much. Just like with surviving romance, Dokja’s world became the story he was reading. Also a very cool aspect of the story is the level up and the fact that its like a game. Earth has turned into this show for god like creatures to watch and it follows Dokja trying to survive. I also really like that TWSA has a protagonist, but Omniscient Reader’s protagonist is not the protagonist that was in TWSA. There is just so much lore and I’ll say it again, the world building is just phenomenal.

The Ddokkaebi’s and Dokja’s interactions are also just some of my favorite moments from the story so far. And oh my goodness I would die for Lee Gilyoung. Thats it, thats the tweet. That little boy could probably kill me with his giant praying mantis and I would let him if it would make him happy.

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Not So Shoujo Love Story

Genre: Comedy

Chapters: 45

Status: Ongoing

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“Romance super-fan Rei Chan is ready for her first boyfriend and she knows just who it’ll be: the most handsome boy in school, Hansum Ochinchin. But her plans for the perfect story are derailed when the most popular girl in class declares herself a rival… for Rei’s heart?! This is the year her not so shoujo love story begins!”

This is just such a cute webtoon. The style is very appealing and while the humor can be childish and weird sometimes, it still has made me laugh a lot. I know the humors not for everyone but just keep in mind that it does get better as the story progresses and gets more serious.

Also its a gl! I’m really unable to find good gls these days that don’t fetishize wlw relationships. Rei being painted as a mean trouble maker whos just misunderstood and Hana being the ‘perfect girl’ who only wants Rei’s attention is such a cute dynamic. They balance each other out and better each other. Also stan Rei for constantly sticking up for Hana even if she doesn’t necessarily like her in the beginning, she has very good morals and sticks to them.

Also the defying stereotypes in this webtoon? Just god-tier. Really makes you think twice when you judge someone just on first impressions alone.

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Odd Girl Out

Genre: Drama

Chapters: 264

Status: Ongoing

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“After a successful winter break makeover, Nari is finally ready for her high school debut. But somehow, she ends up friends with the three prettiest girls in school! Follow Nari as she tries to navigate her brand new high school life surrounded by beauties.”

This story has made me cry multiple times. A lot, even. It is just such a beautiful tale of friendship and finding support in people who are unlike those around theme. It also tells a great story about how anybody can be the ‘odd girl out’. Be it the fat girl, the beautiful girl, the rich girl, or the laid back girl.

It goes so deep into its characters that you even feel bad for the minor antagonists. It really makes you feel for the characters and the reasons behind their actions. Also I know its long, believe me I binged all 260 chapters in the span of three days, but oh my god it is worth it. Also I know the art is kind of off-putting, in fact that’s kind of why I put off reading the story, but I’ve honestly grown to love it and the writing is so good that the art could be literal stick figures and it wouldn’t matter.

The story is amazing and also I just love Nari. She’s just the best.

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Gremoryland

Genre: Horror

Chapters: 67

Status: Completed

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“Six old school friends are invited to be the first visitors of GremoryLand, a new horror theme park that promises an experience as unique as it is spooky. But once this experience starts there is no turning back, and they find themselves tested beyond what they imagines, facing their most desperate fears in order to survive.”

This is definitely one of those stories were you kind of need to turn of your brain and choose to ignore ‘plot holes’ while reading the early chapters because this story definitely gets crazy if you don’t know the ending. Believe me if you stick with it it will all make sense and the satisfaction you get from finding the ending is just so worth it.

The story is so good, and who Gremory is you would literally never suspect. When it was revealed who Gremory was and how he was able to create Gremoryland is so fucking mind boggling that you would never guess. I had to do a double take. It wasn’t like one of those random characters with a vendetta type of twists, but like one you can pick out from clues throughout the story.

Its so good and twisted and just so worth at least giving it a chance.

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These were some of my favorite webtoons on the app! Of course it’s not all of them because unfortunately there is a 10 image limit. I also made this because I’ve run out of new webtoons to read and would love if you guys commented some of your own recs. I can also do a part two with other ones I liked if y’all want more recommendations. You guys can even request specific categories like Drama or Sci-Fi and I can tell you my favorite ones from that genre.

Also a reminder - if you disagree with any of my praise of these webtoons be respectful about it. At the end of the day it’s my opinion and you don’t need to be rude when disagreeing with that opinion.