#rec: luca the bear

[miley1442111]

hiii!! i was wondering if you would maybe wanna write a Chef Luca x reader that takes place at the Ever funeral (they met there) and they get to tell everyone that they are engaged? that would be very cute i think

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time after time- chef luca

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a/n: thank you so much for requesting, I loved this idea and maybe got a little carried away... :)

summary: a look in at your life with luca

pairings: chef luca x fem! reader

warnings: kissing, cursing, smut (18+) (piv, oral (f reciving), fighting, anxiety, brief mention of vomit, reader gets hurt, blood, talk of injuries and stitches (i think that's it??)

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As you walked into the Ever funeral, you couldn’t help but feel the nostalgia hit you like a wave. This was where you’d learnt to cook, where you met some of your best life-long friends, and of course, Luca. As you looked at the halls you’d known so well, you couldn’t help but think about your time there, and how it had impacted you, in every way. 

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Your first day…

You walked in ten minutes early. You were supposed to be twenty minutes early, if you hadn’t had to stop and vomit before you left your new apartment. Chicago was growing on you, though you were surprised at how cold it truly got there, since you’d been living in Spain for the past couple of years. You walked through the halls, everything new, as you greeted fellow students/ chefs. Everyone knew who you were, you were supposed to be a rising star in the food world, winning the ‘Rising Chef Award’ that year for your work in Azurmendi restaurant, a michelin star restaurant in Spain. You were supposed to be the best, so when people found out you weren’t, they would have a fucking field day. 

Carmen Berzatto was quiet, but he was the person you clicked with the most. Clearly the mentally disturbed got along well, that's what you two said anyways. 

Luca was a fucking prick. He was the cockiest of cocky pieces of shit, he was acting like he owned the place, and better yet, he was fucking stunningly gorgeous. You turned to your new friend, Gilian as she swooned over the British accent, tattoos, and built arms. 

The day went by smoothly, hitting it off with other chefs in the group, but never really getting close enough to Luca to really see anything other than his cocky smirks and party-boy aura. You loved Ever already, and you were excelling. You got put with Gillian as your partner, and Carm was put with Luca, and though they both tried to switch, no one would take the other, so they were forced to deal with it. 

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Your first week…

Luca and Carmen were a match made in hell. They politely threw digs at each other right under Chef Andrea’s nose, and when they were caught, she was too fond of the both of them to actually punish them. You’d learnt that Carm had a great way of getting people to do the things he wanted them to, aka, screaming at the top of his lungs, and Luca was slower than Carm, which meant they were both equally as insufferable as each other. Like you said, match made in hell. 

You stayed late one night, trying to perfect a recipe you were supposed to send back to Azurmendi. It was beating your ass, every single time it just felt wrong. Like something was missing. 

You watched in horror as Luca walked into the kitchen, his apron on and a bowl of pastry dough in his hands. 

God, this was going to be a long night. 

“What are you making?” He asked, kneading the dough. 

“Just something for Azurmendi,” you mumbled, not exactly wanting this conversation to progress. Some of the girls had been complaining about his ‘asshole behaviour’ but what they really meant was that he was handsome and didn’t want to go out with them. 

“Can I see?’ he asked, and you nodded slowly, moving out of the way of the dish to let him try it. 

It was a deconstructed caramelised banana pudding with raspberry compote that was still missing something. He walked around the counter, his eyes on you the whole time as you absorbed yourself in the plate. It looked beautiful, but did it taste good? You’d tried a hundred and one things with it, strawberry compote, vanilla sauces, mango, everything. This was your last resort. 

He looked at the plater, moving it around to get different angles. It was a stunning presentation, he couldn’t lie. “What does it taste like?”

You shrugged. He chuckled. 

“What?” he chuckled. “Are you messing with me?”

You shook your head. “I don’t like bananas, or raspberries,” you shrugged. “You taste it and tell me.” 

He was in shock when you handed him a spoon. “You’re sure?” and you nodded.

He dug in, tasting the banana pudding, with the caramel, and the raspberry compote and… it was delicious. Probably the best thing he’d ever eaten, and from the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. See, you wouldn’t know this until years later but since the first day, he’d been looking at you. He’d wanted nothing more than to even be friends with you, he didn’t even know he;d one day become your boyfriend, then your fiancé, and soon, your husband. “That’s fucking brilliant.”

You smiled softly. “You sure?”

“Best thing I’ve ever eaten, hands down,” he nodded, taking another spoon. 

You chuckled. “You’re just saying that.”

“No, trust me, I’m not,” he said, shovelling another spoon into his mouth. “You mind if I finish this?” He asked, mouth full of the dessert. Usually stuff like that would make you gag, but Luca made it funny. You found yourself laughing. “Luca,” he smiled, holding out his hand for you to take once he’d finished his meal. 

“Y/n,” you smiled. 

“You’re really impressive, I’ve seen your stuff. I’d love to pick your brain about Azumendi, if you wouldn’t mind me geeking out about you for a few hours?” He smiled. He was pretty charismatic, and pretty well… pretty. 

“Sure,” you nodded. “When are you free?”

“Saturday night? I know this great restaurant nearby,” He smiled. 

“I’m free Saturday night,” you nodded. “Sounds like a plan.”

“Sounds like a date to me!” Chef Andrea called from behind you two as she walked in. You two jumped apart, despite being pretty far apart to begin with. 

“I-um-you didn’t- it doesn't have to be-” you stumbled over your words as Luca watched with a crooked smile on his face. 

“It's a date,” he cut you off. “Unless you don’t want it to be.” 

You nodded. “Then I think it’s a date,” you smiled. 

Luca was sure to thank Andrea the next day. 

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Saturday night…

You got out of your chef white’s the second you got home and straight into getting ready for the date that was forty-five minutes away. You did your makeup, got dressed, then waited by the door for Luca. 

The doorbell rang and there he was, pink shirt, black slacks and that same Luca smile. He looked you up and down and smiled. “God you’re fucking gorgeous.”

You felt yourself heat up at his comment. “You don’t look too bad yourself.”

He smiled wider and off you went to Lorenzo’s, an Italian spot near Ever. 

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The night went off perfectly, he was sweet, funny, and he actually listened to you as you geeked out about food and restaurants and everything in between. Luca was great. 

When he dropped you back off at your apartment, you were laughing so hard you almost fell over, he caught you by the waist, pulling you into his as he chuckled. 

You didn’t realise how close he was until you noticed his breath on your cheek. Soon, the laughing was softened to sweet smiles, and he cupped your cheek and kissed you softly, much softer than you'd imagined. His lips were sweet, still tasting of the berry dessert you’d shared after your delicious meal. You pull back, a shocked smile on your face.

“I really like you,” he admitted, blushing. “And I really want to take you out again.”

You smiled. “I’d really like that.”

His face lit up. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you nodded. He let go of you, watching as you unlocked your apartment door. 

“Bye,” he smiled. You couldn’t resist, you pressed your lips to his again as his hands circled your waist and yours went to mess up his hair. 

“Bye,” you called after you pulled away, turning to go inside. He looked so good like that, lips red, hair slightly tousled, shocked look on his face. It was nice. He was nice. 

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One month in… 

Luca watched you as you walked into the kitchen, talking with Chef Andrea as she asked about the dish you had made in Azurmendi. He thought you were gorgeous, his eyes were always drawn to you in every room. The past month had been full of dinner dates, getting lunch, and sometimes meeting up for breakfasts before work. He was falling in love with you, and he knew it. Everything about you made him want to know more, to spend more time with you, to be with you. Granted, he hadn’t asked you to be his girlfriend yet, but all that would change today. He’d decided that on your usual lunch break, he’d ask you to officially be his girlfriend. That was the right thing to do, right? 

“You good man?” Carmen asked, chewing much too loud in Luca’s opinion. 

“Fine,” he answered, finally out of his trance. 

Carmen stared at him for a moment. “You good?”

“Good Chef,” he nodded. 

“Cause it looks to me that you’re staring at Chef Y/n,” he observed. “And that means your head isn’t in the kitchen. Is your head not in the kitchen, Chef?”

“My head is as firmly in the kitchen as yours is up your ass Carm,” Luca retorted before leaving to grab his ingredients for the day. Carmen Berzatto was a dick, Luca had no idea what you saw in him as a friend. 

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You were cutting, the same as always. Then you felt the familiar nudge that CArm had been giving you in recent weeks, just a friendly tap on the back as he passed behind you. Then there was a knife in your hand. “Fuck!” More specifically, there was a huge gash in your hand. 

Everyone’s eyes shot up, all attention on you. No one moved as you grabbed your hand, blood gushing as your eyes welled up. You crouched down, holding your hand in pain. 

“Y/n-” Carm tried but Luca was quick to swoop in, kneeling beside you. 

“Are you alright? Come on, let’s go,” he held you as he led you out of the kitchen. He held you close, practically carrying you as he put you into his car, rushing you to A&E. 

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Some stitches, a lot of bandages, and a blood bag later (you’d lost a lot), you were discharged and exhausted. Chicago A&E wait times are no fucking joke. Luca drove you back to your apartment. 

“Anything I can do for you?” He asked, still worried about you. 

“Do you want to come up and we can get takeout? I need to thank you for taking care of me today,” you chuckled. He shook his head, a smile on his face.

“No need for thanking, I’m just glad that you’re ok,” he smiled. “But I will take you up on dinner, since we missed our lunch date today.”

You walked up, hand in hand (not your hurt one), and led him into your apartment. He’d never truly been inside, only getting glimpses, but he knew he’d love it. It was perfect, it was so you. Knick-knacks from you various hobbies and pictures from your life, even one of you as a kid. 

“Cute kid,” he smiled, picking up the photo. You laughed. “She’s cuter now.”

You rolled your eyes at his bad joke. “Shut up,” you chuckled. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Lorenzo’s?” He offered. 

“Wow,” you chuckled. “Call back to when we first started dating.”

He nodded. So you were dating, right? “Exactly.”

“Huh, look at that,” you smiled, trying to keep up the facade of not being very nervous about this. “It’s been exactly a month since.”

“Our one month anniversary,” he smiled and your heart melted. He also thought you were actually dating, even if he hadn’t specifically called you his girlfriend, and you hadn’t explicitly said he was your boyfriend. 

He was silent for a moment, so were you. Just looking at each other.

“That means I can call you my girlfriend, right?” He asked, a bashful smile on his lips. 

You smiled back. “Yes.” 

“Good,” he groaned, pulling your waist into his. “I’ve been wanting to call you that all month.”

You chuckled. “I’m glad.”

He smiled. “So you’re my girlfriend.”

“So you’re my boyfriend,” you chuckled and he pressed his lips to yours. 

“Have I ever told you how gorgeous you are?” he asked, pulling away. 

“I don’t think I deserve that title after crying today. I’m an ugly crier,” you chuckled. 

“You are not an ugly crier, plus it was Carmen’s fucking fault anyway,” he defended. 

You shrugged. “Things happen in the kitchen.”

“And that wouldn’t have happened if Carm was such a piece of shit,” he cursed, smiling at you. 

“Let’s just order dinner, yeah?” 

He pressed his lips to yours again. “Yeah.”

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Two months in…

You and Luca had both had a shit day, nothing had gone right in the kitchen, you’d burnt yourself, and Carmen was really getting on Luca’s nerves, to the point of a screaming match during lunch. 

He pushed you up against the counter as he pressed searing kisses to your lips and neck. You were boiling, despite the freezing kitchen.

“Luc,” you groaned. You and Luca hadn’t gone further than heavy making out, and something told you that Luca wasn’t slowing down this time. It was late, you were the only two still there, who could it hurt?

He pulled your t-shirt over your head pressing a kiss to your clavicle. “So gorgeous.”

“Luca, someone could come in,” You hissed as he pressed kisses down your torso. “Luca!”

He looked up from between your legs, eyes dark and hair messy, and a part of you just didn’t care. You wanted him. “Please baby.”

You nodded, a smile on your face. He pulled off your jeans and underwear in one fluid movement as you lay back. 

“So pretty baby,” he pressed kisses to the insides of your thighs as you started overthinking the entire situation. Someone could just come in, anyone, even Andrea, you had no fucking idea. Also, did Luca actually want to do this? Most guys didn’t like eating pussy, and you didn’t even know the last time you’d shaved. 

He finally pressed his tongue against your clit and your brain short- circuited. “Luca!” You moaned, putting a hand in his hair. “Fuck Luca, there!”

Luca added a finger, then two, until you were writhing on the table, fucking you past your first orgasm and into another one, as he moaned along like he was being pleasured by this.  He didn’t stop sucking and fucking your pussy with his tongue for a long time, despite how hard he was in his boxers, despite how much he wanted to fuck you. You tasted incredible, something he could only dream of recreating, oh, that was a good idea… Anyway, he fucked you through two orgasms, then stood back up. 

You whined at the loss of contact as he unzipped his trousers, taking out his cock. God, he was big. Big, and fucking thick. “Luca I-”

“Are you on birth control?” He asked, spreading some of your slick over his cock and stroking himself.

You nodded. He smiled. 

“Good girl.”

And with that, he pushed into you in one painful thrust. You moaned into his mouth as he pressed his to yours in a searing kiss. He let you adjust, then slowly started moving.   

“Faster,” you begged. “Faster Luca.”

He was all too happy to oblige. 

And that’s how your first time fucking Luca was in the kitchen of Ever. 

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The big fight…

It had been a shit fucking week. Chicago was cold and damp, and your bike had gotten a flat on your way home from work. Shitty. On Monday, your trainee burnt you, then blamed you. On Tuesday, you didn’t even see Luca, he was too busy at Ever. On Wednesday, you smashed your phone screen. On Thursday, Luca’s mother called to say she was visiting next week, with absolutely no warning, so that meant you had to sort out your new apartment all night. 

Shitty. 

Luca barged in, angry from the week. All week he had been fucking up. Small mistake no one should be making, let alone him. Worst part? He hadn’t seen you all week. But there you were, sitting on the couch with a book, snuggled into a throw blanket. 

“Hey,” he called out. No reply. “Baby?” No reply. “Babe!”

No reply. “Fine, fucking be like that.”

Luca marched into the bathroom, his anger bubbling. 

You hadn’t even seen him enter, too engrossed in your novel and the music in your earphones to look up. After about an hour of reading, you left your cosy spot on the couch, retiring to the bedroom. And there he was, your Luca, lying in bed. 

“Hey,” you smiled, climbing into bed beside him. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“Of course you didn’t,” he scoffed, pulling away from you. “You never fucking listen anyways.”

You were taken aback. Why the fuck was he being so pissy? “What?”

“It’d be great if you could even give me, your fucking boyfriend, a singular moment of your time, but I see that that’s too much to ask, so I’ll just go fuck myself.”

“Luca, what is wrong with you?” You huffed, confused at his words. 

“Maybe I’ve had a shitty week alright? And maybe I wanted to spend time with you but you were too busy with your book to even fucking see me!” 

You sighed. “Luc, I had headphones in, I couldn’t fucking hear you.”

“Oh yeah? And how many times have I asked you to turn down the volume or take one out so you can hear the world around you?” He asked condescendingly. 

“Baby, you’re not meant to be home until 11 most nights, not 7:30. I thought I had time!” 

“I sent you a text about it and all!”

“I wasn’t on my phone!” you defended. 

He sighed. “I’m not doing this right now,” and he walked out of your bedroom, and out of the apartment. 

And you were alone. What had just happened?

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Luca took a walk to clear his head, but he just felt worse. He was being a dick and he knew it, but he was just so stressed. Work was hard, and you were the only one who made him feel good enough. And recently, since you’d transferred to another restaurant he’d been wondering if he was good enough in the  kitchen, and for you. 

You were amazing, countless chef awards, you’re a beautiful, stunning woman, but you were also kind, patient, and funny. 

Was he enough for you?

 And that night, it had all just exploded. 

He walked back into the apartment to find you on the couch, eyes puffy and red-rimmed, nose running. He felt awful. 

“I’m so sorry baby,” he whispered, kneeling in front of you. “I’m such an arsehole.”

“Yeah you are,” you sniffled. “But so am I. I’m sorry about the headphones.”

He shook his head. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I was just stressed this week, and I’m just taking it out on you. “I’m sorry, and I love you.”

You both froze. In your year and a half of dating, neither of you had been brave enough to admit that you loved each other, obviously, you both knew and felt the love, but neither of you had been brave enough to do it. 

“Oh,” you said, and Luca looked up, a shocked look on his face. “I love you too,” you blurted out. 

He smiled. “Good, I'm glad.” 

You chuckled. “Me too.”

You both burst out laughing. 

“That was so diplomatic!” you giggled. 

“Who says ‘oh’ after someone says they love them?” Luca laughed, pulling you into his arms as you laughed. 

Your fight had been long forgotten in a matter of seconds. 

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“Thinking about things?” Luca squeezed your hand, bringing you back to reality. He smirked at you. 

“Maybe?” You smiled, holding him closer. “You?”

“Of course I am,” he whispered. “You looked so gorgeous on the counter-”

“Shut the fuck up!” You groaned. 

Andrea suddenly appeared in front of  you two, a bright smile on her face. “My two chefs!”

“Andrea!” You smiled, pulling her in for a hug. Andrea had always been one of your biggest supporters (well, her and Luca), always calling when she heard something new about your restaurant, and even coming to visit when she was in London. 

“How are you two?” She asked. You smiled at Luca, who smiled back. 

“We’re engaged,” you beamed, showing off the beautiful ring Luca had given to you, just a week ago. 

“Oh my god!” she squealed. “What wonderful news!”

“What’s the wonderful news?” Carmen butted in, a smile on his face. 

“We’re engaged,” Luca answered. 

“Shit, congratulations!” He smiled, pulling you both in for a hug. 

“Well, that is going to be one amazing wedding,” Andrea added. “Who’s your caterer?” She joked.

You both laughed. It felt good. It felt good to be this loved.

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the bear masterlist :)

navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games :)

[ruerecs]

𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑝𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑡𝑒𝑟 ℎ𝑖𝑚/ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑓𝑖𝑐 𝑟𝑒𝑐 𝑚𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡.

➞ will poulter

➞ gally

➞ luca

➞ adam warlock

[louierecs]

— ୨୧₊˚ The Bear

— back to main masterlist?

Carmen Berzatto;

- thigh riding with carmy

- somnophilia with carmy

- carmy being a munch

- carmy getting hot and heavy with gf at nat and pete’s house

- carmy’s first time without the condom

- first misses

- carmy asking for sex when he's needy

- needy virgin carmy

- carmy sending you a video of him jerking off

- take it out, let me lick it quickly

- cockwarming with carmy

- having to coax carmy into making noises in bed

- riding carmy's thigh tattoo of your initials

- overstimulation with carmy

- edging carmen

- Carmy literally pushing your head down on his cock

- being almost full term with Carmen’s kid and basically (almost) begging him to fuck you to induce labor

- carmy who puts his fingers in your mouth when you're needy and whiny

- telling dilf!carmy how hot it is when he's taking care of your little one and then fucking raw and dirty just to give him another little bundle of joy to snuggle with

- nsfw alphabet with carmy

ᯓ⭒ more carmy recs here .ᐟ

Michael Berzatto;

- sticky

- hot to go

Richie Jerimovich;

- don't gloat

- brat taming with richie

- richie knowing just the filthiest phrases in Italian and whispering them in your ear while he fucks you

Luca;

- luca has a thing about fucking you in the kitchen

Multiple;

- threesome with carmy and luca

⋆˚࿔ reblog your creators 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

[cessia100]

Playlist

Hi everyone,

I'm currently curating some ideas for a SydLuca fanfic for ao3 and I wonder what kind of music you think Luca and Sydney listen to? or what's their favourite genre or artist? I want to curate a playlist with some suggestions that will sort of help me understand their personalities. So please let me know your suggestions, there's no wrong answer like Luca into vocaloid? you go girl the world is yours

[nolita-fairytale]

nolita fairytale's august 2023 follower celebration

blurbs/headcanons:

carmy x reader phone call from 'make my heart surrender'

jealous!carmy and jealous!luca headcanon

stargazing with marcus brooks (blurb)

adopting pets with bradley bradshaw

taste testing with luca (blurb)

if you met mikey headcanon (make my heart surrender mc)

dating luca long distance headcanon

sneaking around with carmy

dom!javy machado headcanon - top gun maverick

kitchen mishaps with carmen berzatto (blurb)

song recs:

songs that make me think of carmy

moodboards:

cooking with boyfriend!luca

boxer!bradley bradshaw (boxing au)

[munsster]

he’s so

i am very normal. very calm and collected even.

something new | luca x reader

i was awoken from a dream last night

contents: requested size kink so luca is hung!! basically pwp, slight somnophilia if you squint, unprotected sex, spanking, lots of pet names from Luca, reader receiving fingering, dirty talk, semi-submissive reader vibes, pulling out for backshots but some cum play still whoops

a/n: used a photo of will bc it fit the vibe so well 🌝 can we, as a fandom, decide a last name for this man!! only semi proof read i fear pls ignore any mistakes. also no pronouns or real reader description used.

contents: 2.7k.

the climax right before morning's first light

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Your body feels heavy as it’s pulled from a deep sleep. 

There’s warm lips on your shoulder placing soft kisses along your skin, a hand kneading at your ass while you wake up. You hum into the quiet room while burying your face into the pillow desperately not ready to wake up. “S’everything okay?” 

Luca’s chuckling against you, sliding his calloused hand up the back of your thigh while you stay lying on your stomach. He looks down at the sight of you illuminated in the moonlight from his apartment window, soaking in every inch. His hand cups under the bottom of your behind, giving it a little jiggle for his own entertainment. 

“All’s fine, my love. Didn’t mean to wake you so early.”

You turn your head towards the nightstand and it takes a few blinks for your eyes to finally focus on the dim clock. 3:30 AM. Early enough for him to get up to shower, make tea, and leave out a small note of affection on the counter for when you wake up at a much more reasonable time. He typically doesn’t wake you, opting to shimmy out of the bed but not this morning. 

There’s lips on your neck now. “Was dreaming about you and had to make sure you were real.” His hand is sliding in between your thighs now, pulling them apart. Inches away from where you’re starting to crave him. You’re whining in the pillow now while arching your hips up towards his touch. He’s grinning against your skin and rocking himself towards your side. Luca’s hard and heavy against you. “Gonna go take care of this in the bathroom. Just needed a little touch of you before I go.” 

You’re shaking your head now, trying to unpin your arm that’s trapped between the two of you so you can find the waistband of his sweats slung low on his waist. “No, no. Don’t go.” The elastic is tight against your fingers as you slip your hand into his pants, fingertips brushing along his growing length which rewards you with a moan from your boyfriend. His hand gently slaps down on the flesh of your ass before he starts to pull away. You murmur out protests as you stretch your arms out straight ahead of you, fingers curling around the edge of the bed. There’s a rush of cold air as he pulls the blanket from your frame and tosses it to the empty side of the bed. 

He’s grabbing a pillow next and tapping his fingers against your side, grinning as you take the hint and lift your hips for him. “Just lay there, Darling. Let me take care of you.” Luca makes sure you’re comfortable. Taking his time to fluff the pillow just right. Running his wide hands down your back while still lazily waking up. The bed creaks under the two of you as he moves to kneel between your spread legs. He admires your stretched out form. The curve of your ass propped up and his for the taking. You’re wearing an oversized cliche t-shirt from the last trip you took together and this old pair of underwear with a half worn off print. Not the sexiest outfit to ever grace this bedroom to say the least and yet Luca doesn’t mind in the slightest. 

His thumbs slide along the seam of your underwear that’s stretched across your cheeks, warm hands sliding up your backside to your lower back to gently work on your relaxed body. He leans forward to reach up towards your shoulders, the length of him sliding against your ass and eliciting a moan from you. Luca’s taking advantage of this position to rut himself against you, the feeling of your soft body under him working him up even more than he thought was possible. 

“Always so good for me, aren’t you?” You’re nodding against the pillow, turning your head to the side to press a kiss against the hands that are now on your shoulders. “Only yours, Luca.” He’s groaning above you and there’s warm, open mouth kisses being pressed along your spine now. 

There’s a shuffling coming from behind you as Luca makes quick work of kicking his sweatpants off. You feel the warmth of his skin directly on the inside of your thighs now as he sits back up. He’s crooking fingers in the waistband of your underwear and finally, finally pulling them down your thighs and leaving you exposed to him. They’re stuck right above your knees - Both Luca kneeling between your legs and how far spread open you are making it impossible for them to go any lower. “Are you passionate about these?”

You barely shake your head no, because again they’re old and worn and you find it endearing he even asked, before the sound of them being ripped off of you fills the room causing you to gasp out. Luca haphazardly tosses them towards the trash can in the corner and gets to work pulling his own boxes down. You’re needy. Wiggling your hips through the air in slow movements to entice him. As if he needed anymore motivation. You follow his guidance and haphazardly make work taking off your shirt, balling it up and throwing it on his now empty side of the bed.

Since Luca’s doing all the work you allow yourself to stay, essentially, half asleep. Your eyes are still heavy and hooded and your body lax against the bed. He’s delivering one more small smack to the roundest part of your ass before his fingers find their way between your thighs. Normally he’d take more time teasing you, building you up. As much as he yearns to spend the whole day tangled in you, he does have to get to work soon. For now he’s going to be quick but he plans on taking his time with you again tonight. 

There’s fingers sliding up either side of your folds, a slow languid motion to get you used to his touch before his middle fingers slips in. You’re slackjaw against the pillow, letting out a stream of breathy whimpers you can’t control. Luca knows you. Knows every inch of you. So he’s using that knowledge to get you ready for him. His pointer finger slides into you while his thumb finds your clit at the same time. You’re wet, the scissoring and dragging motions Luca’s making causing a slick sound to come from between your thighs. 

“Luca, please.” He grins down at your backside, enjoying the view of his fingers working deep inside of you. “Always so greedy, aren’t you?” You respond by rocking your hips back against his hand and clenching down against his fingers which causes him to chuckle. “Alright, alright.” His hand slides out of you and smacks down against the back of your thigh. Your left behind wetness from his fingers attracts the cold air and causes goosebumps to rise. 

You secretly like when Luca spends a little less time stretching you out then he probably should. The way your boyfriend stretches you out as he first pushes in you has become a piece of heaven. There are nights he spends as long as you’ll allow eating you out and fingering you, toying with your pussy for his own enjoyment. Leaving his chin wet with you and a darken spot on the sheets until he fucks through how sloppy he’s turned you. 

Not tonight. You’re wet, yes. But you know there’s going to be a heavenly burning feeling coming your way. The amount of care your boyfriend puts into you making you comfortable enough to open yourself in that way. Knowing he’d stop the second you asked if needed. 

The head of his cock sits heavy against your entrance and you feel yourself desperately clenching around nothing. He’s pulling you from your train of thought and your body is buzzing in anticipation. The slap of the tip of him against your clit causes your body to jerk which prompts Luca to use his free hand to grip your hip, holding you in place. “Be good, yeah? Let me get us off before I gotta go. Can’t have you wet all day waiting for me to come back home to take care of you.” Luca lines himself up with your hole, sliding just the tip of himself in which pulls a moan from both of you. 

“Baby, please.” Pride swells in Luca’s chest as you start to beg. If he hadn’t been gripping your hips then you would have rolled them back to take more of his length in you. Instead he goes slow, allowing you to adjust to his girth inch by inch. Even after dating for this long, you still weren’t used to him yet. 

There’s a bit of drool coming from the corner of your still parted lips as Luca works his length in. Your boyfriend was well endowed to say the least. A good length, something you could still take to the back of your throat but not so long you couldn’t sink all the way down it. But his girth? That was unmatched. Thick, heavy, and all yours. 

“Feel so amazing, Darling. Was dreaming about this pussy spreading around me.” Luca jerks another inch in without warning, a squelching sound coming from you as the movement causes some wetness to drip out. You can’t form a thought when he’s got you like this. Your body is still relaxed against the bed as Luca stretches you out. 

It takes a moment for him to bottom out and all your mind can focus on is just how deep he feels inside of you. The sensation causes your breath to catch, pathetically letting out whatever whimper you can muster and allowing him to use you to his heart’s content. Luca gives your hip a little squeeze as a warning he’s going to start moving, giving you a second to accept what’s to come before the first roll of his hips hits. 

You’re a mess. Groggy still, already becoming cock drunk. It’s easy to do with him. “S’full, Luc. So, so full.” Even with his brows knitted in concentration as he tries not to instantly cum at the sight of your pussy stretched around him, he’s proud to get you this way. 

But God does the sight of you already have him close. 

Stretched out around him, filled to the max you could be. You look so beautiful like that. Luca fucks through all the wetness you give him, hips building a steady rhythm easily. His eyes flash over towards the clock and something about the pressure of a time constraint is making him a bit more feral than he expected. 

His pace quickens and you’re back to being reduced to a drooling mess under him. Moaning out an incoherent string of pleas, praise, and curses. You couldn’t repeat what’s coming from your mouth even if you tried. His heavy balls slap against your clit which each thrust and Luca’s grabbing your hips with both hands now to get a better grip on you. Fingertips digging in enough that bruises will be left as he starts to fuck into with a firm pace. 

“Such a perfect fuckin’ pussy. So wet for me, aren’t you? You’re gonna be sore all day now but you don’t care. Every step’s gonna remind you how good I fuck you.” 

Your head is spinning. 

You allow yourself to be fucked by Luca, hands gripping the edge of the bed as you desperately clutch anything within reach to keep yourself grounded. He’s… Brutal. Fucking you for his own pleasure in a way. He needed to get off and get off quick before work - But arrogantly knew how good you were for him. Knew that him using you like this would get you off too. 

One of his hands gripping your hip loses his grip and there’s another smack being delivered to the fat of your ass. He groans at the sight of you bouncing, the red mark already blooming from his hand. The burning of being stretched out is fading away and being replaced by the pure pleasure of your boyfriend wrecking your body. 

His hand is sliding up from your ass to press down on the small of your back, a comforting touch compared to the brutal pace of his hips. Long forgotten is the sleepy mask of morning, Luca just chasing after pleasure for the both of you now. You purposely flutter yourself around his length, trying to pull him closer as well. 

“Can you come for me, Darling? You can do that, can’t you? Wanna feel this pretty little pussy finish before I do.” You’re squeezing yourself tighter around him now, the soft pillowcase feeling rougher as your face continues to bounce against it. The room is getting hotter by the second around you two. 

Something about the combination of circumstances has you getting close to finishing far faster than normal. You catch yourself biting down on the pillow as Luca drags his nails down the soft skin of your back, his hips not losing pace as the all too familiar sensation starts to coil up deep inside of you. 

You’re crying out at the sensation, pussy tightening around him as your orgasm rocks through your body. Toe curling, back arching, clit throbbing orgasm. You collapse even further into the bed, a mess of breathless whimpers as Luca continues to fuck through your sensitive body. God you sound lewd with how wet you ended up. 

Luca’s quick to follow after watching you come undone around him.  

He’s moaning out your name, giving a few more pumps through your wetness before quickly pulling out. Stroking his soaked length to keep the sensation and then you feel warmth splattering along your ass and back as he cums on you. He’s breathless and whiney, teasing his own overstimulated cock behind you. Thumb swiping along his tip to collect the last droplets before wiping it in-between your folds and pressing it into you. 

As much as he loved cumming in you, he wanted to make sure he had time to get you cleaned up before he had to leave but he still couldn’t leave you without anything left inside of you. 

Luca drags you to the bathroom after he gives you a moment to collect yourself. Normally he’d take his time with aftercare but sadly he’s lacking just that - time. You use the restroom while he draws the two of you a shower and take a good look at yourself in the mirror while he corrects the water temperature. Healing hickies low on your chest, your hair looking crazy from the combination of sleeping and being wrecked. He’s got twenty minutes left before he runs out of time to make his breakfast but he refuses to leave you in a pile in the bed. 

He makes quick work of washing off your over sensitive body, letting you stand there and run your fingers along his chest, his arms, whatever inch of skin you can reach. “You’re so pretty.” 

Now after what just happened in the bedroom? You’d think nothing would phase him. 

But Luca’s cheeks are going bright red at the compliment. He cups your face with his soapy hands, bringing you two together for a kiss as a silent thank you. 

Luca gets you dried off and sends you back to bed with a pat on your ass. He’s rushing to get ready for work while you lay down in a lump on the bed. Towel tight around your body and the covers long forgotten. It takes a few minutes for him to emerge from the bathroom clothed and hair gelled but he can’t help laughing at the sight of you. You feel the towel being tugged away from your body, the previously discarded blanket being tucked around you and a kiss pressed to the top of your head. 

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

He leaves everything you need for your morning tea sitting on the counter before running out the door.

[enretrogue]

𝗔𝗣𝗥𝗜𝗟 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟯 𝗙𝗜𝗖 𝗥𝗘𝗖𝗦 (𝟭)

.☘︎ ݁˖ = BLACK/POC WORKS | 23' FIC REC M.LIST

MCU

BUCKY BARNES

Bumblebee Series: 1 ⎢ 2 ⎢ 3 ⎢ 4 ⎢ 5 ⎢ 6 ⎢ 7 ⎢  — @angrythingstarlight .☘︎ ݁˖

Soft!Dark!Mafia!Bucky x Runaway Bride!Reader — @angrythingstarlight .☘︎ ݁˖

Peachy Sweet: 1 ⎢ 2 ⎢ 3 ⎢ 4 ⎢ 5 ⎢ 6 — @straywords .☘︎ ݁˖

FRANK CASTLE/THE PUNISHER

Apple Bottom Jeans (+Billy Russo) — @bubuslutty

#15 w/ Frank Castle — @bits-and-babs

Bambi With Fangs ⎢ 2 ⎢ 3 — @bubuslutty

Bring Me Home — @frvnkcastles

Bakery AU — @devils-dares

Love Language (+ Billy Russo) — @bubuslutty

Imagine #1,044 (+ Shane Walsh) — @komotionlessqueenmm

Primal — @darlingshane

Instagram AU — @amhrosina

You’re Everything I Never Knew I Needed — @lemon-world1

Cowboy!Frank — @rrestrella

Really Bad Week — @chvoswxtch

“Come here…Hey! I said come. Here.” — @bullet-prooflove

Sanctuary — @glossysoap

Biting Truth — @narcolini

Soft Morning Sex w/ Frank — @amhrosina

Cutesy Blurb — @thyme-in-a-bubble

Frank w/ An Inexperienced Reader — @amhrosina

STEVE ROGERS

His Inheritance: Chapter 26 ⎢ Chapter 27 — @jtargaryen18

FRANK CASTLE + MATT MURDOCK

Spelling Out “I Love You” — @amhrosina

Baking w/ Matty and Frankie — @chvoswxtch

An Unexpected Delight — @amhrosina

TWD

GLENN RHEE

CDC — @collecting-stories

Feel Me — @nikkisheep

Never Stopped Looking — @glennrheesworld

Sex w/ Glenn — @strgrlxox

PEAKY BLINDERS

LUCA CHANGRETTA

Busted — @mlmxreader

Our Scars — @arzennn

MICHAEL GRAY

Behind On That Cute Date ⎢ Chocolate Pie — @anonymooseforever007

ALFIE SOLOMONS

Airport Snow — @there-goes-thefighter

Angel of Birmingham — @darkdevasofdestruction

Quid Pro Quo — @scorpiussage

THOMAS SHELBY

Dragon’s Den — @pherelesytsia

Afternoon Shelby Chaos ⎢The Boys ⎢Dad!Tommy ⎢Mr. Giraffe — @teenwolf-theoriginals

Mama Bear — @dlmlufics

Arthur + Cards — @dlmlufics

Big Sister Bess — @dlmlufics

Escape to Me — @daisyblinder

GEN. PEAKY BLINDERS

The Proposal (Shelby!Reader) — @anonymooseforever007

TGM

COURT GENTRY/SIERRA SIX

Take a Nap Amidst the Storm — @lloydsbitch

Home — @welcome-to-my-multiverse

SIERRA SIX + LLOYD HANSEN

Ready for Destruction (Prologue) — @holylulusworld

STRANGER THINGS

JIM HOPPER

Handcuffed — @thisfanisgonesorry

Taking Control — @call-me-little-sunshine84

Workplace Gossip — @darling-i-read-it

Batch of Cookies — @sunnylands-world

Hopper x Sleepy!Reader — @ddejavvu

DBF!Hopper — @ddejavvu

Final Essay — @keerysteacake

Plain Old Man — @ddejavvu

Out of the Woods — @mypoisonedvine

DBF!Hopper — @empresskylo

[kaylasficrecs]

˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ fic rec masterlist ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖

✩ if one of the fics is yours and would like me to remove it, pls let me know by messaging me ✩

billy the kid

william bonney

bridgerton

benedict bridgerton

criminal minds

spencer reid ⋆ part 2 ⋆ part 3

detective comics

damian wayne

dick grayson

jason todd 

grishaverse

kaz brekker ⋆ part 2

nikolai lantsov

harry potter

lightning era

cedric diggory

draco malfoy

harry potter

lorenzo berkshire

mattheo riddle ⋆ part 2

theodore nott ⋆ part 2

marauders era

james potter ⋆ part 2

remus lupin ⋆ part 2

hunger games

coriolanus snow

marvel cinematic universe

loki laufeyson

peter parker ⋆ part 2 ⋆ part 3

marc spector

matt murdock

miguel o’hara ⋆ part 2

outer banks

jj maybank ⋆ part 2

rafe cameron

peaky blinders

thomas shelby

percy jackson and the olympians

luke castellan

real person fiction

actors

drew starkey

jack champion

tom blyth

tom holland

nfl & nhl

jack hughes

joe burrow

singers

harry styles ⋆ part 2

scream

ethan landry

supernatural

dean winchester

jack kline

sam winchester

star wars

anakin skywalker

cal kestis

poe dameron

stranger things

steve harrington ⋆ part 2

ted lasso

jamie tartt ⋆ part 2

sam obisanya

the bear

carmen berzatto ⋆ part 2

(chef) luca ⋆ to be posted soon

the summer i turned pretty

conrad fisher

top gun

bradley bradshaw

jake seresin

javy machado

twisters

tyler owens

[pedrito-friskito]

i’m BARKING. i watched this ep of the bear the other night, lowkey sad luca wasn’t in more episodes BUT this hit the SPOTTTTTT

laur ur a goddess as always ily 💕

just a taste

premise: meeting luca after work doesn't usually end up with the two of you in an intense lip lock, both of you knowing once you start it's hard to stop. but that's what offices are for, right?

pairing: luca x (f)reader

word count: 3.1k

contents: literally barely any plot here, oral (f rec), unprotected p in v, coming inside, established relationship, doing it at the workplace, teasing, dirty talk, pet names.

note: i know the bare minimum about this man because i’ve never seen the bear but those tattoos, the accent, the hair?? fill me like an eclair is all i have to say ok!

The cool breeze of the night air almost makes you regret not just heading straight home and slipping under the steam of a nice long shower and grabbing the first blanket you see on the sofa and planting yourself there for the rest of the night. Await your boyfriend's arrival under the comfort of cotton and cushion that he’ll surely plop down next to you on after he’s kicked off his shoes. His cold fingers finding you under the blanket to pull you close to his side, a string of kisses pressed along the side of your neck before finding your lips. The smell of yeast and sugar—embedded in his skin at this point—making you bury your nose into his collarbone. 

But this was a ritual for the both of you. 

You finishing your studies and then meeting him after work. 

The two of you walking home together, barely making it through the threshold of your place before lips and clothes were being pressed together and thrown to the floor. Luca’s soft laugh at needing to shower. Thus always leading to your face pressed into the wall of the shower and Luca’s fingers digging into your hips as he thrust inside of you. 

So that nibble of regret doesn’t last long when you come to a stop in front of his work. The makings of anticipation pull at the corner of your mouth as you grab your phone from your bag and start to text him to let him know you’re out front. 

A text that’s barely on the last word when the breeze of the door is hitting you and making you look up, “you can go in. He's in the back.” a co-worker you’ve met a dozen times, but his name slips your mind as you give him an appreciative smile and thank him as you slip through the doors as he walks out. 

You could enter the kitchen a dozen times—a million, a billion—your nose filling with that sweet aroma, Luca bent over a table, a dish, fingers deep in a ball of dough, the monochromatic uniform making his tattoos stand out on his skin like the most beautiful canvas, and you’d never get over the view. 

Over how your insides react when you see him in his element.

See him doing what he loves. 

It’s like the first time every time. 

Just like the first time he dragged you into the kitchen after your tenth date. Showing you his own version of paradise. His love. His joy. The way his face lit up when your eyes brightened when you bit into the scone he had made—saved—for you. The euphoric sweetness a good dessert can do to one's brainstem is still a scientific mystery to you, but you’d gladly leave the research to the experts if you could experience it forever. 

Taste Luca’s creations forever. 

That memory seems like ages ago. Now well into two years of your relationship. 

Nothing seems to fade with Luca. 

Your first times feeling just as tortuous to your fluttering insides as the tenth or twentieth time around. 

It knocks you off kilter in the best way. 

And when you look over at Luca after dropping off your bag and sweater in an open chair, you can not help but laugh when he finally looks up from cleaning off the surfaces of the metal tables and that stone look of him being in chef mode falls from the creases of his face and his features melt into something soft. 

He doesn’t say anything until his arm is around your midsection, drawing you in. “Hi, beautiful.” He smiles as your lips meet in a long kiss. Kissing you as if he hasn’t seen you in days, as if he has spent the entire day waiting for this moment and this moment alone. “How was your day?” 

“Not as good as it is now,” you tease. Hand in the back of his hair, pulling his mouth back to yours. 

The hum that makes your lips buzz and that lands on your tongue as he backs you up so your back is pressed into the doorframe makes anything you could tell him about what happened in your day lackluster. Incomparable. How could you possibly think of anything worthwhile—how could anything be as worthwhile—as his tongue moving along your bottom lip, his hand at the side of your neck, his thumb rubbing a small circle into your skin? 

It couldn’t.

"Let me finish cleaning up," he smirks. Thumb and pointer reaching for your chin, squeezing it, luring you in for one last kiss before returning to cleaning and leaving you dazed in the doorway.  

And if you didn’t know how seriously Luca takes this, from the ritual of making pastries to maintaining a stern, clean kitchen, you would tell him to hurry. Complaining that it is not fair for him to kiss you like that and then make you wait for him to finish, but the payoff was always worth the wait. And you love Luca’s love for his craft. Love him in this element—watching him and seeing him go into that little part of his brain that makes him go into boss mode. 

The stern gentleness of it all. 

It’s breathtaking to watch.

It’s art.

He’s art. 

So that’s what you do. 

You push off the doorframe and enter further into the kitchen just to watch him. 

“How was your day?” You ask while watching him write on the white board in the corner. 

“Good. We got a new guy who came in.” 

“Is he any good?” 

“Better than he thinks he is.” 

“I bet you brought out his best. You always do.” You smile at him when you watch him shrug off the compliment, not missing the twitch of the corner of his mouth. Ever so modest. 

Wordlessly, he puts the cap back on the marker and sets it against the metal of the board, walking over to one of the refrigerators and pulling out a small bowl of something green and white. 

Something that looks too beautifully crafted to eat, let alone eaten by someone who might not fully understand what went into making something so decadent—something that looks like it would be served to someone with a gold card, not someone who eats boxed mac and cheese for dinner twice a week (which Luca always tries to make fancier than Kraft ever could). 

Luca hands you a spoon, “told him the only critic that mattered was sharing a bed with me.” You make a face, the both of you knowing how outlandish that sounds when the food genius himself is standing in front of you. The critic who mattered to a lot of people more than the girl who was sharing his bed. 

But it still brings a smile to your face. 

“Did he think you were utterly insane for such a statement? I think eating greasy takeout two nights in a row is five star dining.”

He chuckles, “you’re the only critic that matters to me.” His palms come down on the edge of the metal table between you as he leans against it. “The only important one at least. Try it.”

The swoop that runs through you from his words, from his eagerness to hear your thoughts on a dessert you do not even know the name of, but know you will appreciate more than anyone else because it came from someone he admires, makes your cheeks heat up. 

And when it touches your tongue, when that euphoric sweetness overcomes your tastebuds, you don’t think the English dictionary could come in handy with describing the taste. The goodness of it. Compliments, which you know Luca and his fellow chefs have heard many times before and then some. But still bring that artist's joy to their chests when your eyes widen and you look at them in something akin to shock. 

The moan you let out makes him grin.

“Good?”

“Is he single?” 

“Oh, that’s how it is, huh?” His arms cross over his chest, a playful brow raised.

You take another bite of the dessert, “I think you might want to start looking for another job.”

“And a girlfriend?”

You nod, “with something that tastes this good, I would give him my social security number easily. Oh my god.” You dramatically moan around the spoon, the action doing little to hide the simpering look on your face.

“Here I thought I was the only one who could make you spill such confidential secrets.” Luca strides across the table, coming to stand at your back. His lips pressing against the back of your neck and the top of your shoulder. 

Finding its home where your collarbone meets the junction of your throat, where he lets his warm breath blow against the known sensitivity there, then presses his lips to it. Making your back push into his front, your body melting against him. 

A soft noise lays dormant at the tail end  of your throat, making a ghost of a smirk etch against your skin from his mouth as he murmurs, “and the only one who can make those noises come out of you.”

Your voice is breathy when you say, “so much for being humble.”

"When it’s the truth, I do not need to be humble." His lips trailing to your ear, fingers running up the back of your exposed thighs, pulling up your skirt until they are at the apex of your hip, skating forward and close to your clothed mound. “Am I wrong? Should we see?” 

The spoon in your hand lucky you don’t have superhuman strength because it would be crushed in your grip right now. 

Luca’s fingers splay themselves across your pelvis, toying with the top of your underwear. “Hmm, awfully quiet now. Where’d my mouthy girl go?” An airy chuckle tickles your ear as he lets it out, “humbled are you?” 

There’s a teasing sneer forming on your mouth before it does a 180 and morphs into an ‘o’ as Luca’s fingers push into your underwear, the pad running through the clear as day arousal that’s been making your thighs clench uncomfortably since your kiss in the doorway. 

When the finger moves against your clit there's no covering up the gasps that fall from your lips. Or the way your ass grinds against the erection that’s pressing up against it. 

“Who’s humble now?” He teases. A cheeky grin on his face when he pulls his hand out from your underwear, bringing his finger to his lips and sucking it into his mouth. Making your cheeks heat even more when you turn to look at him. Your teasing turns needy as you give him that look, the one that always makes him drop whatever he is doing and have his body on yours within seconds. 

You both know that making it home now will feel ten times longer. Ten times more agonizing in the cool air with your warming bodies.

With you soaking your underwear and him hard against his zipper. 

So when he says “office”, all you can do is chew on your bottom lip in eagerness as you make a beeline towards it. Luca closer behind you than you expect when you hear the door shut seconds after you’ve entered and his mouth immediately on yours, your ass hoisted onto the nearest surface. 

Luca’s fingers making quick work to pull down your underwear, your skirt bunched at your hips. You fully expect him to pull himself up from his knees after slipping the lace from your ankle and tossing it to the floor. You expect him to come back up and slide inside of you quick and easy, but instead he’s trailing kisses and bites into your thighs. 

Blue eyes look up into yours, and he must see the need in them—that glint that tells him all you want is for him to be inside of you right now. The heady woes of foreplay just torture at this point. 

His teeth sink harder into your flesh, making you gasp. “I’ve worked hard all day; don’t I deserve a treat? A taste of the best dessert out there.” 

And how could you argue with that?

You can’t.

Not when his tongue runs from the bite mark in your skin to your wetness. Spreading you around him as he licks a stripe up your pussy. Your grip on the metal your ass is under hard and tight enough to leave marks against your palm. 

And as crude as it makes you sound, as obscene and cocky as it comes off your lips, you will never hold back from telling Luca that his talent as a chef will never outweigh how good he is with his mouth and cock. 

He’s multi-talented and it’s a blessing and a curse to your insides. 

“Oh, fuck. Luca,” your head hangs between your shoulders. Your fingers in his hair, the heel of your shoe pressed against his back—his apron long gone, leaving him in that navy blue—his fingers digging into the side of your thighs as he keeps you against his mouth. 

The mouth that’s switching between sucking your clit between his lips and rolling his tongue against it. Eating you like you’re the best dessert his tongue has ever had the pleasure of tasting. 

It never takes him long to get you there. To make your chest heave and your nerve endings light up, as if they are about to make you panic from the overwhelming feeling of pleasure that is completely taking over your body. 

His fingers have created beautiful, mouth watering food, just as they’ve made you completely lose your mind. Your legs shaking around his head. Your back involuntarily bows until it hits the metal surface of the desk you’re perched on. 

It’s when he slips two fingers inside of you that you completely lose it. The sob that pulls itself from your lungs feels red-hot in your throat as your fingers grip the strands of his blonde hair as you come against his mouth. Your hips riding out your high. Rolling against his tongue in a languid way, drawing out the aftershocks of your orgasm. 

Your body still reeling and alight with that desire-train that still has it wanting more. That heavy ache between your legs that wants to be filled. To be fucked by something bigger and thicker than a finger.

Your mouth comes down on the tabasco tattoo below Luca’s wrist in a gentle kiss, one of your favorites of his, when his hand comes to cup the back of your head to pull you up to him. 

His thumb runs from your cheek to your chin, where he pushes it up, so you’re looking up at him and he’s looking down at you as he stands between your legs. Your nails run along the tattoos along his arms, up his bicep, and to the nape of his neck. A fire burning in his eyes when your fingers run between the strands back there. 

“Tell me,” he says close to your lips. He’s checking in. Seeing if you’re too spent for his cock, seeing if there's more you want. If you want to wait until you get home. If you’re ready for him now. 

“It’d be cruel to not fuck me now.” You say it in a half-tease-half-serious tone. 

“Ooh,” he murmurs against your mouth, his tongue clicking against his teeth. “I don’t want to be cruel.” You can feel his other hand move between the two of you, undoing the button of his pants and messing with the zipper until he’s pulling himself out of them, hard and leaking. “What kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t give my girl what she so desperately needs?” 

Luca smirks when you laugh into his mouth, “the worst kind.”

With one last kiss, lick, and nip at your lower lip, he’s rubbing the tip of his cock against your clit, making your thighs shake. Nails dig into his skull as he soaks up your oversensitivity to coat himself before going lower and slipping inside of you in one slow, fluid motion. 

Your mouth hung open at the stretch, and your breath caught in your lungs. Your foreheads resting against each other as you let your walls accommodate his girth, both of your breaths heavy. The pounding you can feel between your legs—that you’re not sure is coming from him or you or something more poetic and overwhelming like your conjoined bodies aching as one, like a heartbeat aches for a chest cavity when it’s torn from a body. 

The two of you need this. 

Need each other. 

When Luca starts moving, you know the two of you are both completely fucked. Spent and so full of desire that you know your time in this office is just the start of a long night of tangled limbs and wet mouths. 

The sounds you are making against each other's mouth are breathy and intoxicating. His tongue in your mouth swallows every mewl and moan he coaxes from your body with each stroke of his cock. 

His fingers find the back of your head again, not allowing you to even think about leaving his mouth. 

You think you see stars when his palm finds the back of your thigh and pulls your leg higher on his hips. Think you could let this man completely consume you, and you’d still never be satisfied. Never get over how good it feels to feel his hips drive deeper into you, to feel the head of his cock hit that spot inside of you that makes his name roll off your tongue like a prayer. 

“Who’s pussy is it, baby?” 

"Mm'fuck," you are not sure if he is still playing the game of you leaving him for the new chef or if his filthy mouth is attempting to completely destroy you—which is nothing new when he has you coating and tightening around his cock like this. 

When you say his name, when you whine it into his mouth like a pathetic desperation, the erotic noise that it’s met with makes you cling to him tighter. Makes you press yourself closer to him. The movement makes the outside of his pants grind against your clit. 

“So beautiful,” Luca murmurs. The octave of his voice grows lower and choppy with heavy breaths the closer he gets. Neither of you lasts much longer when his pace picks up. The grip the two of you have on each other is hard and rough, enough to tear and leave marks that you’ll later kiss with gentle lips, unlike the passion that’s coming through with the hard kisses your mouths are giving as you both come. 

“How’d I get so lucky?” He breathes into your mouth, twisting your insides even more. 

[ruerecs]

https://x.com/bestofpoulter/status/1781030745081032799?s=46

will poulter being spotted on the set of season 3 of the bear has actually made beyond happy. can’t wait to write/read more fics and make more edits of this beautiful man.

[louierecs]

— ୨୧₊˚ fic rec masterlist

The Walking Dead;

Rick Grimes, Daryl Dixon, Glenn Rhee, Abraham Ford, Negan Smith, Shane Walsh, Carl Grimes

Call Of Duty;

Johnathan Price, Simon 'Ghost' Riley, John 'Soap' MacTavish, Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick, Alex Keller, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo Parra, Phillip Graves, Keegan P. Russ, Makarov

Criminal Minds;

Aaron Hotchner, Derek Morgan, Spencer Reid, Luke Alvez

911;

Bobby Nash, Evan 'Buck' Buckley, Eddie Diaz

Outer banks;

Rafe Cameron, JJ Maybank, John B, Pope Heyward

Sons of Anarchy;

Jackson 'Jax' Teller, Filip 'Chibs' Telford, Juan Carlos 'Juice' Ortiz, Alexander 'Tig' Trager, Happy Lowman, Opie Winston

Triple Frontier;

Santiago 'Pope' Garcia, Francisco 'Catfish' Morales, Will Miller, Ben Miller

The Bear;

Carmen Berzatto, Michael Berzatto, Richie Jerimovich, Luca

Marvel;

Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, Peter Parker, Deadpool, Wolverine, Frank Castle

Marauders;

Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter, poly!marauders

Harry Potter, golden era;

Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, and Cedric Diggory

Slytherin Boys;

Tom Riddle, Mattheo Riddle, Theodore Nott, Lorenzo Berkshire, Regulus Black

Youtube;

Harry Lewis, Tobi Brown, Simon Minter, Niko Omilana, Sharky, Aj Shabeel, ChrisMD, Willne, Calfreezy, TheBurntChip, George Clarkey

Other Characters One;

Javier Pena, Steve Murphy, Joel Miller, Marcus Acacius, Benny Cross, Agent Whiskey, Eggsy Unwin, Jim Hopper, Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw, Severus Snape, Lucius Malfoy, Arthur Morgan, Joel Miller (game version)

Other Characters Two;

Carl Gallagher, Lip Gallagher, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, John Winchester, Oscar 'Spooky' Diaz, Cesar Diaz, Nick Amaro, Sonny Carisi, Joshua 'Scud' Fromeyer, Griff, Sam Rossi, Nate Archibald, Diego Hargreeves

More Recs of my top characters;

Daryl Dixon, Simon Riley, Aaron Hotchner, Spencer Reid, Rafe Cameron and more Rafe, Carmen Berzatto, Frank Castle, Logan Howlett, Wade Wilson

⋆˚࿔ layout credit to @ruewrote 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

[lucyswinter]

Request guidelines

Requests are : OPEN<3

Masterlist

Who/what I write for:

-Cillian Murphy/ characters: (Jackson Rippner, Tom Shelby, Neil Lewis, Jonathan Crane, Kitten Braden, Jim: 28 days later, Emmett: a quiet place part II, Raymond Leon, Robert Fischer, Tom Buckley)

-Criminal Minds: Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotchner, Derek Morgan, Emily Prentiss, Penelope Garcia, JJ,

-The Bear: Sydney Adamu, Richie Jerimovich, Carmen Berzatto, Sugar Berzatto

-Saw: Lawrence Gordon, Adam Stanheight, Mark Hoffman, Peter Strahm, Amanda Young, Jill Tuck, Lynn Denlon (for ships: I’ll do chainshipping, coffinshipping, and shotgunshipping/lynnmanda!)

-American Horror Story (All seasons up to Cult with the addition of 1984. Only ships if they are canon (by season, I mean)! i.e: I won’t do Kit Walker (s2) x Madison Montgomery (s3) or anything! And for canon relationships, I will do any season besides NYC and Delicate as long as they are already together. For example, I would do Montana and Richard from 1984.)

-Nip/Tuck: Sean McNamara, Christian Troy, Matt McNamara, Julie McNamara, Liz Cruz, Eden Lord, Sophia Lopez, Kimber Henry

-DC villains (from the Nolan trilogy or Gotham tv show! I will specify from which one I mean. I’ll also write Batman but that’s the only “hero”/vigilante)

-Peaky blinders: Luca Changretta, Tom Shelby, Alfie Solomons, Finn Shelby, John Shelby, Arthur Shelby, Oswald Mosley

-Top Gun/ Top Gun: Maverick: any characters! (For ships, I only rlly know IceMav 😭 but I’m open to others! I’ll also do penny!reader)

-Bridgerton/ Queen Charolette: Daphne x Simon, George x Charolette, Anthony x Kate, Colin x Penelope (and all of these characters individually as well as Benedict, Violet, Eloise, and the Featherington sisters! *Edit for season 3*: Lord Debling, Lord Stirling, Lady Arnold, Lord Anderson, Francesca Bridgerton, Cressida Cowper)

-Community: Professor Ian Duncan, Jeff Winger, Abed Nadir, Britta Perry , Annie Edison, Troy Barnes

-Impractical Jokers: Joe Gatto, Sal Vulcano, James Murray, Brian Quinn

-Supernatural: Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Castiel, Destiel (will not do Wincest or Wincestiel)

-X-files: Fox Mulder, Dana Scully, MSR

-BBC Sherlock (only JohnLock)

-Good omens (only Ineffable husbands)

-Hannibal (only Hannigram)

(Any other characters im open to! Just PM me to see if I know the fandom/media they’re in, or rec with a few options! I’ll ignore if I don’t know them <;3)

I will write: A bit ooc (depends on scenario 🤭), fluff, smut, small-ish age gap, AU’s, non romantic pairings, alternate endings, fem!/gn!/afab!reader, character x reader, character x character

I won’t write: Male!/nonbinary!/trans!reader (im a cis female so I will write gender neutral reader if requested, but most fics (unless specified) were written with a fem reader in mind :)), incest, underage reader (or character), dub/non-con

Thanks for reading! Feel free to PM requests if you aren’t comfortable sending them through the question button or want to work through the request :)

[wtfsteveharrington]

the bear masterlist

18+ minors dni | please check content warnings

✨ - smut | ♡ - fluff | 🥀 - angst

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

carmen berzatto | blurbs | fic recs

✨ after midnight - part one - part two

cam worker!reader who has their profile found by carmen & what ensues after

🥀 take the upper hand

carmen finds you at a party after the two of you got into a fight & makes the two of you talk it out.

sydney adamu | blurbs | fic recs

richie jerimovich | blurbs | fic recs

chef luca | blurbs | fic recs

✨ something new

luca tries to never wake you up before work but couldn't help himself for once

[snowfallrecs]

── navigation .ᐟ ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

she/her, adult, writer. current hyperfixation: bale!batman.

welcome to my multifandom fic recs blog - tags below are for organization! i do not own any of the works on this blog. reblog and show support to authors (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

♯ ┆ 001. ⭑ ( fandoms )

ᯓ｡°꒰ hunger games / tbosas ꒱ ♡ coryo — ♡ sejanus — more tba ᯓ｡°꒰ dc ꒱ ♡ bruce wayne — ♡ clark kent — ♡ jonathan crane — more tba ᯓ｡°꒰ marvel ꒱ ♡ loki — more tba ♡ xmen // ♡ wolverine ᯓ｡°꒰ maze runner ꒱ ♡ newt — ♡ minho — ♡ thomas ᯓ｡°꒰ anime ꒱ ♡ jujutsu kaisen // ♡ gojo ᯓ｡°꒰ youtubers ꒱ ♡ george clarkey — ♡ chrismd — ♡ harry w2s ᯓ｡°꒰ video games ꒱ ♡ ghost (cod) ♡ love & deepspace // ♡ sylus ᯓ｡°꒰ shows ꒱ ♡ billy the kid ♡ tlou // ♡ joel ♡ peaky blinders // ♡ tommy shelby ♡ house of the dragon // ♡ aemond targaryen ♡ the bear // ♡ chef luca — ♡ chef carmy ᯓ｡°꒰ actors ꒱ ♡ tom blyth — ♡ cillian murphy — more tba ᯓ｡°꒰ miscellaneous/other ꒱ ♡ f1 ♡ eggsy // kingsman

♯ ┆ 002. ⭑ ( genres )

♡ smut — ♡ fluff — ♡ angst — ♡ humor — ♡ suggestive — ♡ headcanons — ♡ smau — ♡ dark — ♡ pregnancy — ♡ links

♯ ┆ 003. ⭑ ( navigation tags )

♡ nav — ♡ tbr — ♡ fav — ♡ non fanfic ᯓ｡°꒰ mutuals ꒱ ☆ rain

[queen-of-boops]

"Doctor Lucas"

Alright friends, it's time to talk about my biggest LITG pet peeve. It happens all the time, I'm reading a Lucas villa fic or scrolling through Tumblr and I see it: "doctor Lucas". My brain immediately checks out, alarm bells blaring.

I want to be clear here, I'm not policing headcannons or what you can or can't do in fic, especially AUs, the entire point of AUs is to mix things up like careers or backgrounds, etc.

What I am saying, is that canonically, Lucas is a physiotherapist.

For some reason, of all the physios we have (Summer and Jack), Lucas is the only one that's often referred to as a doctor. Maybe it's because he works in a hospital, or maybe somewhere along the line fanon warped him into something else. But as an acute care PT, nothing will make me click out of a post/canon compliant fic/etc faster than "doctor Lucas" or having him do something wildly out of scope.

For one thing, the US is the only country that requires a doctorate for physical therapy. That being said, I can count on one hand the number of times someone even knows I have a doctorate, and I have never been called Doctor outside of the academic setting.

So what does a hospital physio do?

Preserve mobility: let's be real, sick people don't want to move, but lying in bed all day makes you lose strength and range of motion fast

Transfers: how do you get to a chair now that you suddenly don't have left leg anymore? How can I make moving less painful for you following major abdominal surgery? How do you move when you have new precautions and can't bend your hip past 90 degrees?

Gait: Do you need a walker now? A cane? Do you have weight bearing restrictions and need to figure out how to walk with them? Is your gait pattern unsafe?

Stairs: Are there stairs at your house? How can I make them safer for you and the person who's going to be helping you? What techniques can I teach you to help decrease pain and increase safety?

Balance: 99% of people in the hospital are at an increased risk for falls, how can I decrease that? What can I do to improve your balance?

Discharge recs: Where is the patient going after the hospital? Are they safe to go home or do they need rehab? Do they need any equipment to be safe at home? 90% of the time, the rehab department is the one making those calls.

Communicate mobility needs to staff and family: Most of the time, I'm the first one getting someone up. Do they need 2 people to sit on the edge of the bed? Does their right knee buckle when they walk? This is important information that the people taking care of the patient needs to know for everyone's safety.

We see patients post stroke, waiting on transplants, post surgery, after getting the transplant, chronically ill, etc. Patients on vents, with lines and tubes and drains all over the place, even with open surgical sites... they're all appropriate for therapy.

What physiotherapists definitely don't do:

Perform surgery or scrub up or observe or do anything even near the OR.

Give or adjust medications. I'm expected to know what medications do and look out for associated symptoms, but the most I can do is message the doctor and tell them what I'm observing.

Work with a crashing patient. It happens, you're in the middle of a session and a patient codes. Call the code and start performing CPR. But as soon as anyone else arrives, the therapist is the least qualified and least important person in the room. And if a therapist hears a code called, they're getting the hell out of the way to make space for the appropriate team to arrive.

Call time of death. Yes, patients die. Unfortunately, that's just how it goes. And yes, sometimes you come in to work only to learn that the patient you were working with yesterday passed away. But most of the time, if a patient is that close to dying, they're not appropriate for therapy. They're not dying in the therapist's arms or anything like that.

Use physical therapy as a stepping stone to become a doctor. There's not a ton of overlap tbh. I'm sure it has happened, but it's not like a PT degree is a degree that gets you into med school.

Listen, I LOVE my job. I get peed on, puked on, pooped on, etc. There are rude patients and emotional days and difficult conversations that need to be had, but at the end of the day I'm proud of being able to help people in need. You don't get into physical therapy if you don't love it. The pay isn't all that great and sometimes it's a very thankless job. Burn out rates are high, especially in the hospital setting. But those who stick it out are those who can't imagine doing anything else.

You have no idea how happy I was to see a character with my job who actually responds well to questions about it, so you can imagine how frustrating it is to constantly see my profession being overlooked or misinterpreted in the fandom.

Please, next time you go to respond to a post saying that you'd rather be stranded on a deserted island with Lucas because he's a doctor, or write a villa fic where Lucas talks about scrubbing in for surgery, keep this post in mind.

[garbinge]

I really don’t know if I’m ready for this, I’ve been foaming at the mouth waiting to read this but now that its here I am like so giddy and excited and nervous to get into it!!!!

His heartrate was beginning to speed up inside his chest, his grip on the edges of the box tightening, knuckles turning white. He stared harder at the papers in his eyeline, barely blinking as he began to spiral.

Before he got taken too far away, there was a knock on the doorframe of the office that jolted him back to reality, back to the present instead of the montage of memories that was starting to kick up at the forefront of his mind. Pasting an entire paragraph and a half here but this is literally perfectly in line with canon, like this the cut- the break in tension - I see it happening so fucking clearly, God, Tay!!!!!

“Of course he put that in there.” Yep, this is my nerves because this line makes me want to scream and kick my feet and giggle and sfhagjkshfgkjhfjdkfh.

I am still giggling, Carmy explaining and backpedaling and just getting tripped up. You are down bad my g <3

Not me only two seconds into this reading this line: Each day, Luca spoke to him a little more. And being like okay NOW KISSSSSS

Carmy tossed him the lighter, a smirk curling his lips as he watched Luca fumble to catch it in time. The same man whose hands moved at the speed of light when it was about knives and cutting boards struggled to spark up a lighter. Skdjahkjghajdkfs GOD I AM FEELING THINGS this is so cute alksjdfkhdkjahjk

“why are you staying in a place that’s making you pretend to take up smoking?” “Why are you in a place that made you take it up for real?” I live for dialogue like this man, I also love that despite being low-key in an embarrassing situation, which, Carry did such a sweet job not making him feel that embarrassed, but I love that Luca is still so quick to give it right back. As he should!!!

felt like some secret that they were the only ones in on. Luca never tried another cigarette, and Carmy was glad for that in a way that he didn’t know how to articulate. Tay teach me your descriptor ways please. This hits me so emotionally in such few sentences and I just want to cry.

the words felt like marbles in his mouth again, the above note.

“Just wanna cook for someone who won’t yell at you, yea?” Honestly felt that from every kitchen scene in the bear lol

I love that Luca is just nosing around like same, my dude. I be NOSY.

running his hand up along the inside of his bicep. He pushed the sleeve of his t-shirt up, fingers grazing over the tattoo the intimacy of this and like it’s his own arm it’s not even them touching like kjfaksdhjk.

“Klepto.” Okay I know this is a carmy fic, but every so often I see Lip Gallagher in Carmy in canon and I love that it carries into the pic world too because this line is Lip-coded.

“New York, I think. Probably.” These lines Tay. They are so perfect. I hear them so directly from these characters. “Might wanna firm up those plans a bit.” Like literally. “Yea, no, I mean, I’m, I’m locked in. For sure.” Like literally literally.

NOT THE USE OF THE NICKNAMEEEEEEE YES NOW KISSSS <3

movements more assured than Carmy had ever been in his life, could ever hope to be, and suddenly the suffocating feeling of it all was gone GOD they deserve that so much.

Oh my gosh. The phone call. I know we talked about it but reading it just is fucking hitting me. Like to be so far away from the person you care about when they’re having a moment and wanting nothing more than to be there but its also still weird and new and you haven’t talked in so long and you’ve just woken up so you’re a little all over, I just– how many more times can I slam my keyboard keys?? Sdalhajkfhgjkah

Everything in Copenhagen. Everything. If I pulled things from it I simply would be pasting the whole pic over again. I just, I cannot stress how much I love this pairing, how you write them, how low-stakes it is but also how high emotion it is. The banter over baking the pastry, over the tattoos, them falling into this rhythm!!!!! THE CONVO ABOUT THE CAT ITS JUST SO ORGANIC AND REAL AND CANON AND HEARTWARMING.

The ending I just. I want nothing but good times and love and peace for these two and I just simply cannot say it enough. This was BEAUTIFUL, this was so warm and soft and pure and real and honestly I want to read this over and over again and live in a bubble on a boat in Copenhagen. I just love every detail you poured into this, every connection, every character dialogue and research into inflection, words, tone, and how they’d interact together and tie backs, and full circle moments. I just simply could melt away. Bravo, Tay, bravo.

Closing the Gap

Carmy Berzatto x Luca

Summary: As everyone tries to get things under control for the construction and eventual opening of The Bear, Carmy inadvertently gets sent on a trip down memory lane. A series of flashbacks to a different time, with different people. Or, really, just one different person.

Warnings: 18+, language, light angst, smoking, pining, implied smut

Word Count: 10k

A/N: It's a 10k Carmy/Luca fic and honestly I think that's all there is to say about it 😂

The Bear Taglist: @garbinge @withmyteeth @narcolini @justreblogginfics (If you want to be added to any of my taglists, please let me know!)

Carmy was staring down at the box of paperwork that he’d just set on Sugar’s desk in the office. He wasn’t really reading the tabs on the folders in front of him. His mind was running at a mile a minute and it was getting farther and farther away from the office, and The Bear in general, with each passing second.

His heartrate was beginning to speed up inside his chest, his grip on the edges of the box tightening, knuckles turning white. He stared harder at the papers in his eyeline, barely blinking as he began to spiral.

Before he got taken too far away, there was a knock on the doorframe of the office that jolted him back to reality, back to the present instead of the montage of memories that was starting to kick up at the forefront of his mind. Clearing his throat, his eyes went wide for a second before looking over his shoulder to see who was knocking to get his attention.

Marcus was standing in the doorway, holding a book in his hand. He had his beanie and a t-shirt on, no apron yet. Carmy assumed that he must’ve just gotten in. Prying his fingers away from the edges of the box, he turned around so that he could face Marcus completely.

“What’s up, Marcus?” he asked as he perched himself on the edge of the desk, trying to look more put together than he felt.

Marcus held the book up. “Just bringing this back.”

Carmy’s eyes widened slightly as he chuckled. “Done with it already?”

Marcus nodded, a shy smile on his face for a moment before he said, “There’s a lot of really cool stuff in there.” He paused. “You know how to do all this?” He shook the book a bit to emphasize his point.

Carmy shrugged, nonchalant the way he always was whenever he talked about the things he’d done, the things he was good at. “Most of it, yea.”

Marcus chuckled as he shook his head, knowing without even having to ask or comment on it that the man standing across from him was downplaying things to an almost criminal degree. “I’ll settle for getting good at some of it.”

His hands came to rest in his lap, fighting the urge to fidget, the urge to reach for a cigarette. He didn’t even really want one in that moment, but it would’ve given him something to do. Forcing his hands to still, he looked at Marcus. “I’ve got some more at my place. I’ll bring them in for you.”

Marcus nodded, clearly enjoying the thought of that. More books. More inspiration. More ideas. “Thanks, chef.” He stepped farther into the office so that he could hand the book back to Carmy. As he was about to hold the book out to him, recognition flashed across his face, like the finally got the grasp on a memory he’d been trying to recall. “Oh, shit, yea, I almost forgot.” He opened the front cover of the book and pulled out an old, somewhat wrinkled, piece of paper. “This was tucked in one of the pages.”

Carmy’s brows knit together as he reached out to take the paper. His expression eased almost immediately as he looked at it, going from concerned, to puzzled, to amused. His entire body relaxed, posture softening as he looked at the collection of doodles and drawings all over the paper.

“Shit,” Carmy said with a soft chuckle. “Of course he put that in there.”

Now it was Marcus’s turn to look confused. “Who?”

Carmy shook his head slightly, lips still twitching as he fought back a smile. “This, this guy, this kid I was a commis with. We, uh,” he laughed quietly, “we kept ending up in the same spots.” He gestured to the book that was still in Marcus’s hand. “He got that for me. We, we both…yea.”

Marcus gestured to the rumpled piece of paper that Carmy was holding. “He draw those?”

Carmy laughed a little harder at that, almost a real, full laugh. “No, no. I mean…not, not really.” His eyes dropped back down to the page, looking at the smudged ink and eraser marks left behind by both him and Luca. “Most of these are mine. He’d try, then I’d, you know, I’d fix it.”

Marcus chuckled. Of course on top of everything else, Carmy could draw. Sure, he thought silently to himself, why not? Why wouldn’t that also be something else that his boss could do, and do well?

He could see it in Carmy’s face that the book, the drawings, whatever memories were attached to them, were taking him somewhere else. Marcus had no intention of trying to pry. So he cleared his throat, offering the book over to Carmy. “Thanks again.”

Looking up, Carmy nodded as he took the book from Marcus. “No problem.”

He barely even noticed the fact that Marcus was leaving. One the book was in his hands, Carmy immediately cracked it open. It had been one in a stack of many that he’d given to Marcus the week before. The Bear had become a library of sorts with how many books were being swapped out among the chefs there. It was good. All of it was good. But as Carmy flipped through the pages of the pastry book he was holding, for a few precious minutes he was no longer standing in the middle of the construction zone that was The Bear.

**

“I’m Luca, by the way,” he said as he tied the apron strings behind his back.

Carmy pulled his gaze up from the floor, face scrunching for a split second as he got out of his own head and took in what was actually happening in front of him. “What?”

“Luca.” his hands dropped back to his sides as he looked at Carmy, a bare hint of a smile on his face. “My name’s Luca.”

Carmy nodded, finally processing it all as he finished putting on his own apron. “Carmy.”

For the rest of that first day, that was the only thing they said to each other that could even try to pass for conversation. The rest of the day was just calling out shorthand to each other, and calling back to the other chefs in the kitchen when they were supposed to.

The controlled chaos of the kitchen felt new and routine all at the same time. Clear directions. Flawless hand-offs. Yelling and cursing when it seemed unnecessary to anyone who didn’t live and breathe it all like the rest of them did. Coils wound so tight that they had no other option but to snap.

Each day, Luca spoke to him a little more. They’d get there early, doing their prep in the silence of the kitchen before everyone else showed up. Carmy never initiated the conversation, but he never brushed Luca off either. Sometimes he would catch a slight bristle in Luca’s tone. He was never out-right antagonistic, never under-handed the way that his family sometimes was at home right before they tried to tear into him. But sometimes there would just be a slight edge to his voice, frustration that didn’t really feel directed at Carmy even though he was the one on the receiving end of it. It never really crossed Carmy’s mind to try and investigate—he’d learned better than to ask people if they were alright or what their problem was.

“You’re really fuckin’ good at this, you know,” Luca said one morning when it was just the two of them at the prep station.

Carmy hesitated, stopping what he was doing for a moment. The sound of the knife against the cutting board died off in an instant. He tilted his head just slightly, not enough to face Luca head-on, but enough to let him know that he was tuned in now. “What?”

“You’re really good at this,” he repeated. He chuckled and shook his head a bit, impressed and almost like he was in disbelief. “I came into this feelin’ pretty good but now,” his eyebrows lifted for a moment, “now I’m thinking that maybe I got a bit too comfortable.”

Despite the confusion on his face, Carmy still smiled. He gave a tiny nod, not sure what else to do. “Right. Well, um, thanks.”

After that, it felt like every time Carmy turned around, Luca was there. It wasn’t bad, it wasn’t suffocating the way that it felt in other restaurants when he had someone breathing down his neck telling him that he was doing something wrong. It felt like Luca was an extension of the same machine that Carmy was. He was there, ready to take the baton for the next part of the never-ending relay that the two of them were in. As time went on, the gap between them never quite closed, but it got more manageable.

Carmy didn’t know if he was overthinking it or not, but he could’ve sworn that he felt a shift in the air around the two of them as the days ticked by. Sometimes he thought that maybe he was just projecting, letting all the years of being home and trying to anticipate everyone’s actions and feelings before they happened bleed into the present where it had no right to be. But other times, he was pretty sure that he was right. Maybe he was a little crazy, but he was almost positive that he was right, that things were changing.

Luca never seemed bothered by it, and there was something about that, that seemed impressive to Carmy. Not that he ever figured out how to say it.

The kitchen hit a small lull after a brutal rush. Letting out a breath Carmy was fairly certain he’d been holding for hours at that point, he made a comment about stepping out for five minutes to smoke a cigarette. He hadn’t thought about how long it’d been since he had one until the chaos lessened and his mind started to wander, his fingers starting to itch for one.

He stepped out back behind the restaurant. The door hadn’t even shut before he was flipping open the top of his pack of cigarettes. He was listening, waiting to hear the clunk of the door closing behind him as he put one between his lips.

When the sound didn’t come, he turned back around, lighter at the ready in his hand but not lit yet. His eyebrows were raised, and he was about to make a snide comment about shutting the door when he saw that it was Luca. The tension in his body eased when he saw the almost sheepish look on Luca’s face as he stepped completely outside, finally letting the door shut.

“Sorry. Just, you know,” he said with a laugh, gesturing over his shoulder in the direction of the kitchen.

Carmy let out a low chuckle as he nodded. “I know.”

He lit his own cigarette before tilting the pack towards Luca, letting the action ask the question for him. There was a brief second of hesitation before Luca reached out and took one cigarette from the pack. Neither of them commented on it.

“Here,” Carmy tossed him the lighter, a smirk curling his lips as he watched Luca fumble to catch it in time. The same man whose hands moved at the speed of light when it was about knives and cutting boards struggled to spark up a lighter.

Luca pulled a drag off the cigarette between his lips and instantly descended into a coughing fit. Carmy chuckled, letting out an easy exhale, smoke streaming out from between his lips as he did. “Do you even smoke?” Luca’s silence spoke volumes and Carmy laughed, a real laugh for the first time in a long time. “Why would you—”

“Only way to get out of there for five minutes,” Luca said, voice strained as he tried to hold back another cough.

Carmy shook his head, leaning and reaching over to take the cigarette away from Luca. “Give me that.” He had a tiny smile on his face still as he snubbed the cigarette out on the ground. He situated himself comfortably back against the wall again, a couple seconds passing before Luca was standing beside him in the same position. “So,” Carmy said, doing his best to initiate conversation the way that Luca always seemed to do so easily, “why are you staying in a place that’s making you pretend to take up smoking?”

Luca chuckled and shook his head. He would’ve been embarrassed if he was the type. “Why are you in a place that made you take it up for real?”

Carmy’s eyebrows shot up for a moment, shock fading into amusement as he took another drag. “Fair.”

Things shifted again after that. Each smoke break that followed that, one where they would both slip out the back and into the alley, felt like some secret that they were the only ones in on. Luca never tried another cigarette, and Carmy was glad for that in a way that he didn’t know how to articulate. They would stand out back, shoulders pressed against the concrete wall behind them. Luca would watch Carmy tap the ashes off the end of his cigarette and Carmy would pretend not to notice him doing it.

“You got plans?” Carmy asked one day as they were both leaving the restaurant.

Luca laughed, shaking his head as he pushed the door open. “Any of us ever have plans?”

The fleeting grin on Carmy’s face was small, shy. “Right.”

Luca’s head tilted slightly, matching Carmy stride for stride as they went down the sidewalk. “Why?”

“Wanna come over?” the words felt like marbles in his mouth and he just hoped that they didn’t sound that way too. “I just. You know, shitty shift.”

Luca grinned. “Just wanna cook for someone who won’t yell at you, yea?”

Carmy let out a sharp exhale through his nose, half a laugh as he felt his cheeks flash hot. “Yea.”

“Sure,” Luca agreed easily.

When they got to Carmy’s apartment, Luca had no problem making himself right at home despite the fact that Carmy had next to nothing filling the space. It wasn’t even like it was a bachelor pad—he just didn’t have furniture.

It didn’t stop Luca from nosing around what little Carmy did have. Carmy tried not to watch him, knowing that there wasn’t really anything that he had to hide per se. But he also couldn’t remember the last time he had someone else in his apartment.

“You draw these?” Luca asked, carefully spreading out the small stack of papers that he saw resting on the edge of Carmy’s counter.

Carmy’s eyes widened at the question. He nodded, instantly trying to busy himself with getting things out of his cupboards to cook with. “Uh, yea. Yea I…yea.”

Luca had a smile on his face as he looked back and forth between Carmy and the drawings, all different dishes. Some of them were ones he recognized from the restaurant, others were thing’s he’d never seen before.

“They’re good.”

“Thanks,” Carmy mumbled as he turned the burner of the stove on.

“Can I ask you something?”

Carmy shrugged, still not looking back over his shoulder at Luca. “Shoot.”

“You draw your tattoos, too?”

He’d never been so glad that Luca couldn’t see the look on his face. “Um, yea. I mean, some of them. Most of them.”

Luca nodded even though Carmy wasn’t looking at him. Subconsciously he reached up, running his hand up along the inside of his bicep. He pushed the sleeve of his t-shirt up, fingers grazing over the tattoo that was inked into his skin there. He wasn’t even looking at his own arm as he turned over the information in his mind, but it was like he could feel it.

Somewhere along the way, that became part of the new routine. After an exceptionally hectic shift, they found themselves eating over the counter in Carmy’s apartment. Luca would nose around. Every now and then if there were blank spaces on sheets of drawing paper, he would put his own doodles there like Carmy wasn’t going to notice. When dinner was done Carmy would laugh, shake his head and start making little shifts, changes to the drawings that Luca started. Both of them would ignore the dishes in the sink and the fact that when Carmy reached over him for the paper and pencil his forearm would rest against Luca’s for all of a few seconds.

“Plans?” Carmy asked one night at the end of their shift.

Luca’s face brightened for a moment at the question. “Yea, actually.”

Carmy’s eyes widened just slightly as he slipped his coat on. “Yea?”

Luca nodded and grabbed his jacket as well. “Tattoo appointment.”

“Right.”

They both walked out the door. “Wanna come?” He saw the hesitation on Carmy’s face. “Won’t take long.”

Carmy sucked in a deep breath as he weighed out the options. “Uh, okay. Yea. Yea, sure.”

They talked on the walk there. Or rather, Luca talked and Carmy listened. He lit up a cigarette on the way. Whether it was because of the nerves or because his hands felt a little too idle, Carmy didn’t know.

“Hey,” the artist greeted Luca with a grin and a handshake that shifted into a quick hug when they entered. The man made a quick introduction to Carmy, who was feeling more and more out of place by the second, before jumping right into business. “So,” he brought Luca over to his work station, “you said that you had an idea?”

“Yea,” Luca nodded, reaching into the pocket of his jeans and pulling out a crumpled piece of paper. Clearly it had been unfolded and refolded numerous times. He handed it over to the artist, whose eyes were instantly darting all over the paper because of all the different drawings crammed onto the paper. He pointed to one that was off towards the side of the paper. “That one.”

Carmy’s eyes looked like they were about to pop clean out of his skull as he watched the entire interaction play out in front of him. “Luca,” he finally forced out, eyes rapidly darting back and forth between the paper, Luca’s face, and the place on Luca’s arm that he was gesturing to, “wh-what, what are you doing?”

“What?” Luca responded easily, like this was all the most normal thing in the world.

“You’re not—are you—?” Carmy couldn’t force out a full sentence.

Luca smiled, that same expression that seemed to come so easily to him. “Yea.”

Carmy had so much that he wanted to say about it, but it was like all of the words piled up and got stuck at the back of his throat. Instead of saying anything, he just nodded. When the smile on Luca’s face got a little wider, it became a little harder to be as nervous about it.

Soon the silence of the shop was cut through by the sound of the tattoo machine. Carmy sat by, watching the artist as he worked. Listening to the man and Luca converse back and forth. Luca didn’t even flinch as the needles etched the ink into his skin, like it took nothing for him to keep his arm still as it vibrated against the outside of his bicep. The artist colored in the heart, carefully doing up the outline and the small flowers at the top and bottom of it. The stark, traditional shading and lines standing out against Luca’s skin as it all got brought to life.

It was over quicker than Carmy thought it was going to be, even though he knew better. Soon enough Luca was slapping cash into the palm of the tattoo artist and they were saying goodbye. Carmy was pretty sure that he said goodbye to the man, but he couldn’t truly remember. It felt like suddenly it was just him and Luca back out on the sidewalk again.

“Not that bad, right?” Luca asked with a small grin.

Carmy looked over at him, not really sure what Luca was referring to in particular. Then he saw the way he was nodding towards his arm. Carmy chuckled and shook his head. “Not bad.” He paused, watching as Luca carefully slipped his arms back into the sleeves of his jacket. “When’d you take that, anyway?”

Luca shrugged. “Couple weeks ago.”

Carmy smiled, the spike in his heartrate for once didn’t feel like an impending anxiety attack as he laughed. “Klepto.”

“You didn’t even notice!” he responded with a laugh.

Carmy was still shaking his head as the two of them started making their way down the sidewalk. Luca was looking around at everything, meanwhile Carmy went back and forth between looking at the sidewalk passing beneath their feet, and looking over at Luca.

Neither of them brought up the tattoo after that. Sometimes Carmy would see it while they were working in the kitchen, when Luca’s sleeve would slide up when he reached for something. It was a fleeting thing, the kitchen not creating the type of environment conducive to longing stares.

Their time together as commis was rapidly approaching an end. Carmy could feel the days ticking by and he felt like he was supposed to be doing something about it but he didn’t know what. Luca would be laughing on their fake smoke breaks, he would be rooting through Carmy’s cabinets at home and ragging on him for the amount of instant ramen he had stashed in there, and Carmy could feel that he was letting opportunities pass him by. He didn’t know how not to let them keeping slipping away from him.

“I’m telling you,” Luca said as he twirled pasta around his fork, “you can come visit anytime.”

Carmy smiled small, unable to make himself look over at Luca. “Yea? Any time? Just, just drop what I’m doing and fly—”

“Across the pond,” Luca finished for him with a laugh. “Yea.”

Carmy shook his head. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Good.” He paused. “Where next?”

He let out a sharp exhale. “New York, I think. Probably.”

“Probably?” Luca parroted back with a chuckle. “Might wanna firm up those plans a bit.”

Carmy turned and looked at him a little more head-on. “Yea, no, I mean, I’m, I’m locked in. For sure.”

“Second-guessing?” Luca asked, the humor gone from his voice and genuine interest in its place instead.

“Ah, um,” Carmy stammered as he tapped his fork against the edge of the bowl, “I guess?”

“Why’s that?”

Carmy paused, really considering what he wanted his answer to that question to be. “I, I do it with everything, I guess.”

Luca waited until Carmy was looking at him. “Everything?”

Carmy’s heart was beating fast enough to the point he just thought it was going to stop altogether. “Pretty much,” he forced out, voice quieter than it needed to be.

There was hardly any space between them, and Carmy had never been more aware of his proximity to another person before. The air was heavy with tension, and opportunities, and Carmy felt like it was all about one breath away from suffocating him completely. He thought that his hands were going to start shaking, enough to make the bowl fall from his hands and clatter against the floor. That was just what he needed.

“Carm?”

He wanted to look away but he couldn’t. Luca was looking at him in a way that made Carmy feel like his knees were going to give way underneath him. He was too used to having people looking through him that having someone looking at him was tough to stomach without crumpling. He opened his mouth, tried to say, “Yea?” but he couldn’t get the word out and his jaw slowly closed again instead.

Then Luca smiled and suddenly the intensity of it all seemed a little more bearable. Then Luca kissed him, movements more assured than Carmy had ever been in his life, could ever hope to be, and suddenly the suffocating feeling of it all was gone. There was no ceramic shattering on the floor, he didn’t flatline, the world didn’t crumble around them. It was good. And Carmy tried his best to just let it be good.

Carmy’s hand slid up Luca’s arm, fingers reaching underneath his sleeve just enough so that he was able to graze over the tattoo there with his fingertips. He grabbed onto Luca’s arm a little tighter, tried to pull him a little closer. The first thing he’d done in a long time that he didn’t hesitate on. Then Luca’s hand was on his shoulder, sliding up to rest against the side of Carmy’s neck, and then the rest of the world just faded into the background.

Carmy had no idea how a goodbye could hurt so much and simultaneously feel so anticlimactic. There was no getting out of it though. Luca was leaving, and Carmy wasn’t. Or, he was, but it didn’t matter because he wasn’t leaving to go to the same place that Luca was.

He sat in his apartment, the space feeling emptier now than it ever had before even though nothing had been taken out of it. He braced himself against the kitchen counter, fingers wrapped tightly around the edge of it. His eyes zeroed in on the book sitting on top of the counter. Luca had given it to him at the end of their last shift together. Leaving it with an easy, “Light reading for when you start to miss me too much,” that made Carmy laugh in the moment but the weight of it felt a little different now.

He drummed his fingers on the cover of the book. He could tell that it was brand new, the outer sleeve still glossy. The entire book, the whole hundred-plus pages of it, were all different pastries and desserts. Of course. Despite the heaviness hovering over his chest, there was a small smile on Carmy’s face as he delicately opened the front cover of it, like it was made of glass not paper.

Tucked inside the front cover was a note scribbled onto an index card. Carmy instantly recognized Luca’s handwriting. “Better learn one of these before you come visit. -Luca” His smile grew a little wider, a choked laugh getting stuck in the back of his throat as he looked at the small drawing scrawled at the bottom of the index card. Shaking his head, Carmy took the card out and tacked it onto his fridge.

It'd been months since Luca had left, months since Carmy started at his placement in New York. Every day of it had been hell. But he couldn’t stop himself from showing up every morning ready to go through it all over again. He was popping tums like they were candy and he was surprised that his hair wasn’t falling out in clumps, but he was getting through it. Despite the hellishness of it all, Carmy felt like he was doing well. Felt like he was doing things right.

Then one day it just didn’t feel that way anymore. He couldn’t pinpoint it. Maybe it was just too many hours with an asshole executive chef breathing down his neck. Maybe it wasn’t enough sleep, wasn’t enough real food that didn’t come out of the microwave or the freezer. Maybe it was too many cigarettes and not enough water. But suddenly he was out back behind the restaurant in New York hyperventilating and feeling like he was about to pass out. His hands were shaking and then he was dialing Luca’s number, something that he hadn’t done since he left.

“You know there’s a time difference, yea?” Luca said, clearly exhausted and groggy as he chuckled on the other end of the line.

“Hey,” Carmy managed to put all of his strength into getting that one word out. His voice made him seem like a completely different person. Maybe he was.

He could hear the rustling on Luca’s end, briefly wondered what he was doing or setting aside to be able to talk. It was easier for Carmy to think about that than everything else. “You alright?”

Carmy cleared his throat, but it didn’t really help at all. “You meant it, right?” He raked his fingers back through his hair. “Fuck. Fuck. You, did you mean it when you said I could visit anytime?”

Luca’s voice was smooth and steady, warm in the way Carmy had remembered it. “Course man, yea. Absolutely.”

“Okay.”

There was a pause, like Luca was waiting for Carmy to say more and then he didn’t. “Okay.”

“Th-thank you,” Carmy stammered out. “And. And I’m sorry.”

Luca didn’t acknowledge any of it, not wanting Carmy to think that he owed an apology, or that he owed any extra gratitude for what just transpired between them. “I’ll see you soon then, yea?”

Carmy exhaled deeply, intensely enough for Luca to hear it on the other end half a world away. “Yea.”

It seemed like time hadn’t even touched Luca when Carmy saw him again. He was standing outside the airport, looking around like he hadn’t been living there and already taking it all in for months. Luca heard the sound of a suitcase rolling on the cobblestones, the way it was getting closer. Looking over, he beamed when he saw Carmy.

He held out both his arms. “Welcome to Copenhagen.”

Carmy laughed, those three words eradicating the worry that things were going to be off between them. It was one of the only things that he could think of the whole flight over. But of course it was alright. It was Luca.

“C’mon,” Luca joked as he gestured for Carmy to follow him, “I’ll be your tour guide.”

Carmy didn’t do much talking as the two of them walked to wherever Luca was deciding to take him. He was glad for it. He listened as Luca talked about some of the places that they passed, some of the things he’d been up to in his time there. Carmy would’ve listened to him for hours if he could. He missed it, missed him. He should’ve called.

“Oh,” Luca turned and looked at Carmy as they walked, “I did get a place for you to stay. Marie has some rules but it’s a pretty cool spot.”

“Yea?” Carmy allowed himself a little hopefulness. Something about being on the other side of the world from the rest of the chaos making it seem more doable.

Luca nodded. “Yea. Honestly I might be crashing in on you while you’re there.”

Carmy smiled small and warm at the thought of it. “Alright.”

Of all the things Carmy had been expecting, he certainly hadn’t been expecting Luca to bring him to a boat. His eyebrows lifted, a surprised smile on his face as he look back and forth between Luca and the boat. He had questions but as he looked at the giddy smile on Luca's face he decided that none of them really mattered.

“Pretty cool, yea?” Luca said as he held his hand out to help pull Carmy on-board.

Carmy laughed as he accepted the help, nodding as he balanced his luggage and his footsteps getting on. “Yea, pretty cool.”

It took an extra couple of seconds for Carmy to realize that his hand was still gripping onto Luca's. When he brought his gaze up to Luca's face, he realized that Luca was focused intently on his hand. For a fleeting moment Carmy thought the worst, but then he realized that Luca was studying the ink on Carmy's skin. A tattoo that hadn’t been there before when they were in Chicago together. Carmy had gotten plenty of other tattoos since, Luca too, but he was acutely aware of why Luca was fixated on that one in particular.

Pulling his hand away, Carmy tried to cover his nerves by clearing his throat. “You said she left instructions or something?”

Luca didn’t seem fazed by the shift in conversation. “Right, yea, c’mon.” He motioned for Carmy to follow him inside. He ducked to fit underneath the top of the door frame, but not quite low enough and he thumped his head as a result. He muttered out a quiet, “Shit,” before laughing.

Carmy laughed too, shaking his head as he went through the door with no issues. He slipped past Luca, who was reading the note that was left on the table for him.

He was looking for a decent place to set his bags for the time being when he heard Luca ask, “You alright with cats?”

“Cats?” Carmy parroted back.

“Yea,” Luca stepped over to where Carmy was standing by the bed. The small space they were in making him feel much closer than usual. He showed Carmy the paper. “Said you gotta leave water out for the cat.”

Carmy shrugged. “I can do that.” He watched as Luca set the note down. Then it was just the two of them standing in the silence of the boat, and Carmy knew that now was the time to say something. “Thank you, again. Seriously.”

Luca shook his head slightly. “Don’t thank me.” He paused. “You alright?”

Carmy didn’t know how to answer that question. Right then, in that moment, he was as alright as he could ever remember being. But he knew it wasn’t a feeling that was going to last. Eventually he’d have to go back. And then what? He was going to be left in the same situation he’d been in when he called Luca. Not alright at all.

“I am now,” he answered honestly.

Luca gave a slow nod, able to hear what Carmy wasn’t saying. “You wanna talk about it?” He gave it a beat. “About New York?”

With no hesitation Carmy shook his head. “No. Not, not right now.”

Luca nodded. “Sure.”

Silence filled the space between them again, and Luca could see it in Carmy’s posture, in the way that his hands were fidgeting with nothing, that he was trying to figure out if he’d said the wrong thing or not. It was so strange to Luca, the fact that that was a constant concern on his mind, because as far as he was concerned, there wasn’t a single thing that Carmy could say to him in their moments together that would ever constitute as wrong.

He broke the ice again, happy to do it as many times as necessary. “I can promise you that there’s nothing in the fridge or the cupboards. So,” he shrugged, crossing his arms over his chest, “we can take care of that if you’re not too beat.”

Carmy nodded eagerly. Food. Groceries. Those were things he could handle talking about. Those were topics that he wouldn’t fuck up. “Yea, I’m good for that.”

Luca smiled. “Great.”

It was as easy as Carmy ever remembered it being with Luca. Maybe even easier, with the worst of his stressors an ocean away from him for now. Luca led the way through markets and shops and Carmy was more than happy just to follow, to listen to what Luca had to say about all of them. Most of the things they bought were groceries, but every now and then Luca would take him on a detour, popping into a bakery or strolling up to a stand and buying something small to eat as they wandered. He justified it as giving Carmy inspiration, expanding his palette, not that that was a large concern for him anyway. But really it was just nice to be able to share this part of his life.

“Good, yea?” Luca asked as he watched Carmy take a bite of the pastry he’d just handed over to him.

Carmy’s brows knit together for a moment, his expression serious as he really turned over each flavor. “Whoa,” he said, food still tucked in his cheek, “that’s fire.”

Luca’s face brightened as he laughed. “Right?” The two of them continued on their way, bags hanging in the crooks of each of their arms. “Been missing out.”

Carmy chuckled, watching Luca as he confidently guided them back towards the boat. “Yea, apparently.”

They worked in tandem to find homes for all of the groceries they’d brought back. Carmy laughed every time Luca had to duck his head to get underneath something. Tried and failed to stifle that same laughter the times that he forgot and ended up bumping his head against the low ceilings and doorframes of the boat.

When they were together in Carmy’s apartment, Carmy did most of the cooking. Luca would pitch in here and there, but it was Carmy’s domain for the most part. This time around, in what little space they had to cook on the boat, the two of them were doing everything together. Once again, they were part of the same machine, but this time it flowed so nicely—no screaming, no stress. They just flowed their way through it and at the end of it all they had a meal.

“So,” Carmy said as they sat at the tiny table together, “is your boat down the street? Or are these just for tourists?”

Luca laughed, shaking his head. “Tourists only, yea.” He shrugged nonchalantly. “My flat’s alright. More furniture than yours had.”

Carmy almost choked on his food. “Oh yea?”

Luca laughed and nodded. “Yea.” His shoulders shook with refrained laughter. “Not like this, though.”

Carmy studied Luca’s face, watched the way he was focused on the plate as he gathered another forkful of food. “You asking to stay over?”

Luca’s eyes diverted back up to him, a smile curling the ends of his lips. “Only if you’re saying yes.”

Carmy’s entire face flashed hot and he was smiling before he knew what he was doing. “Yes.”

His grin grew a little wider. He nodded, but didn’t say anything else about it as the two of them went back to finishing their meal. Carmy’s heart felt like it was beating clean into his throat but he didn’t mind it. He forgot what that was like.

“Nah, I, I got it,” he said as he waved Luca off when they were done, stopping the man from getting up from the table. “You’re just gonna smack your head off something again.”

Luca chuckled but he didn’t fight him on it, letting Carmy gather up their plates and silverware and bring it to the sink to start washing them. For a couple minutes Luca just sat back and watched Carmy, the way he still did everything with the same meticulous precision he did in the restaurant, but now there wasn’t that same tension in his shoulders like there had been before. He drummed his fingers lightly on the tabletop for a moment before getting up to go and help. He saw Carmy turn, about to try and send him off again, but he didn’t give him a chance as he grabbed a towel and started to dry the dishes he’d set in the drying rack.

“Thank you,” Carmy said, sounding more amused than he wanted to.

Luca smiled, nodded, but didn’t turn to look at him, didn’t say anything in response. The two of them comfortably silent as they continued to wash, dry, and put away the few dishes that they’d used to cook and eat with. Carmy was extremely aware of the contact each time their hands touched, fingers brushing on the hand-off. He was equally aware of the fact that Luca didn’t seem shaken about it like he was. One day he’d feel that kind of comfortable confidence.

“Luca?” Carmy said, drying his hands off when they were done.

“Yea?” he tilted his head slightly, not completely facing him yet as he dried off his own hands and set the towel to the side.

The three seconds between Luca saying that and looking at him felt like some of the longest of Carmy’s life. A long time to wait trying to make one day happen now.

Luca finally turned and looked at him, the look on his face clearly showing that he was about to say something, maybe even ask if Carmy was alright. Carmy didn’t give him the chance to get the question out. He wouldn’t have been able to answer it anyway. Instead, he leaned in, bringing his lips to Luca’s. Even with everything that happened, there was still a split second when Carmy worried that he was going to pull away. But he didn’t. Of course he didn’t. He didn’t pull away, and Carmy leaned in more and brought his hand to the side of Luca’s face.

He leaned down, melting right into Carmy, relaxing into it like it was the most natural thing in the world. Carmy almost didn’t know what to do with that. It felt like each part of his body was moving independently from the others, brain detached from all of it. But suddenly his other hand was on Luca’s side and he was pulling him back, the few strides there were between the kitchen and the bed.

The moment was broken only by the muffled thumping sound of Luca’s head hitting the ceiling as they stepped from one area of the boat to the next. It caused both of them to laugh, breaking the kiss.

“Shit.”

“Fuck.”

They both swore quietly at the same time. Carmy was shaking his head, cheeks feeling like they were on fire even though it wasn’t really his fault. “You good?”

Luca chuckled, nodding. “Yea, it’s alright.”

The moment smoothed itself over. Soon enough Luca’s lips were right back on his again. Carmy didn’t know how he managed to make something so pivotal feel so low-stakes. Something that would’ve had him paralyzed with fear if it was anyone else felt so traversable now.

When Carmy woke up, it was to the sound of Luca shuffling around the boat in the small hours of the morning. He was hunched over, gathering his clothes off the floor. Carmy’s eyes were barely open at all, still heavy with sleep. His brain was working at half-speed trying to figure out what was going on.

“All good?” Carmy mumbled, propping himself up on one elbow.

The humor in Luca’s tone was impossible to miss, getting more enjoyment than maybe he should have at how exhausted Carmy sounded. “Yea. Work.”

“Shit,” Carmy said, pressing the heel of his palm against his eye. “Right.”

“Go to sleep,” Luca told him, pulling his t-shirt down over his head. “I’ll be back later.”

Carmy was too tired to argue, jetlag catching up to him something fierce along with all of the exhaustion he’d been trying not to feel over the last few months. It felt safe to feel it all now, let it take him out for a few more hours.

Luca did come back, just like he said he would. He returned to the boat with a backpack stuffed full of clothes and other miscellaneous things. Carmy felt like an idiot for how wide his smile grew at the realization of it when Luca set it with Carmy’s suitcase.

That was their life for the next few days. Cozy nights fumbling around the close quarters of the boat, cooking meals that they each knew they wouldn’t be making for themselves if they were alone. They took turns doing dishes. Luca would leave early in the morning, Carmy usually only waking up just long enough to see him go before falling back to sleep again. And when he’d wake back up again, with most of the day to himself, he’d go out. He’d find restaurants. He’d go wander in places that he never would’ve taken the time to under any other circumstances. Let himself be a tourist and he’d send Luca photo evidence of it even though he couldn’t really respond.

Luca got back to the boat one night and Carmy was already elbow-deep in making something that Luca had no idea about. He loomed over Carmy’s shoulder, looking back and forth between what Carmy was doing, and the book that was open and precariously perched just out of the danger-zone.

“What’s all this?” he finally asked.

Carmy spared a quick glance over his shoulder. “You, uh,” he laughed, feeling a little ridiculous about it, “you said I had to learn one of these before I came to visit.”

Luca gave him a warm smile as he tried to take a closer look at the recipe that Carmy was working from. “Did you?”

“I mean, I don’t have it memorized, but, you know, yea. I learned it.”

“Too busy to memorize it?” Luca joked.

Carmy laughed, eyes widening for a moment. “Yea. You know, can’t remember what I was so busy doing. No priorities, apparently.”

“None, yea,” Luca agreed with a grin.

Truth be told, Luca never would’ve been able to tell if Carmy had ever made a dish before or not. Everything he ever saw Carmy attempt to make always came out great, like he’d made it a thousand times in his sleep before. It was beyond his comprehension.

“Glad I gave you that,” Luca said with a smug smirk pulling at the end of his lips, half-eaten pastry in his hand.

Carmy shook his head but he smiled too. “I’m sure.” He took a bite of the one he’d been holding onto. “You should check it out.”

Luca nodded. “Sure.”

Carmy’s voice got softer as he said, “Good.”

He could see it on Carmy’s face that his mind was wandering, going too far beyond the reaches of the boat they were in for it to be anything good. “Hey.” He waited for Carmy to look at him again, both their expressions shifting slightly. Luca lightly knocked his knee against Carmy’s. “It’s all good.”

He blinked, nodding, processing the comforting shorthand. “Yea. Yea. It’s all good.” He paused, shoulders relaxing. “Thank you.”

Luca smiled, an easy comforting thing. He watched Carmy finish off the pastry that he was eating. He could see the thousand tiny little shifts in his expression, and Luca had to laugh. “What?”

Carmy looked confused, almost startled at the question. “What? I didn’t, I didn’t say anything.”

“What are you gonna do different next time?” he asked, lifting the pastry in his hand a little higher. He saw the way that Carmy was about to try and come up with a rebuttal and he didn’t let him. “I can see it on your face, Caz.” He couldn’t stop laughing. “What is it?”

Carmy rolled his eyes, tried to keep a serious expression on but he broke down into laughter too, knowing that there was no way he was going to be able to lie to Luca. “I don’t know how to explain it. Something’s just…you really don’t know what I’m talking about?”

“Not a clue,” Luca admitted with a laugh, unashamed as could be.

“You think I’m nuts.” It was a statement, not a question as Carmy stared at him.

“Oh, well, yea,” Luca said, face bright with humor. “’Course I do.”

Carmy broke down in laughter. “Fuck off.”

They were both lost to fits of laughter after that, sitting next to each other at the small round table. Luca watched as Carmy poured over the recipe again, like if he reread the words over one more time he would be able to pinpoint what it was about it that he didn’t like.

“Carm?” Luca piped up, knowing that Carmy had no concept of time, no idea how long he’d been staring at the same page in the recipe book.

“Yea?” Carmy replied, not looking up from the page.

Luca chuckled, reaching over and shutting the book on him. “Try again tomorrow. Not gonna fix it all today.”

Carmy huffed, but smiled as he leaned back in his chair. “Right. Yea.”

It was late. Later than it should’ve been considering Luca’s alarm would be going off in a few hours. He was on the bed beside Carmy, laying on his side with his head perched in his hand, arm bent keeping him propped up enough to look at Carmy’s face as Carmy laid on his back and stared up at the ceiling. He studied the little details of Carmy’s face, things that he didn’t get to see in other moments, things no one else ever got to see. The light sheen of sweat across his forehead, the flush of his cheeks, the way only a few locks of his hair stuck were unruly enough to fall in front of or on the sides of his face. He watched the rise and fall of Carmy’s chest, drastic but faster than it usually was as he tried to catch his breath.

For a moment Luca didn’t even think that Carmy was paying attention to him at all, thought that maybe he was lost in his own thoughts or maybe even for once wasn’t thinking any thoughts at all. But then Carmy’s eyes wandered, matching Luca’s gaze. His lips curved upwards into a small smile as he looked over at Luca.

“What?” Carmy asked, laughing quietly.

Luca shook his head, watching as Carmy tucked one hand behind his head. “Can I ask you something?”

That was the kind of question that would usually be enough to send a jolt of fear clean down Carmy’s spine. But it didn’t this time, like nothing could touch them here. “Yea. Always.”

With the hand that wasn’t keeping his head propped up, Luca reached over and gently took Carmy’s free hand in his own. Carmy watched with bated breath as Luca turned his hand over, fingers grazing deftly over his skin.

“When,” Luca started to ask, fingertips lightly tapping the flower that was inked into the side of Carmy’s hand, one that looked very similar to the ones that were around the heart on Luca’s arm, “did you get this one?”

Carmy couldn’t take his eyes of his hand, off of Luca’s hand that was still toying with his own. His face felt like it was on fire. He knew that Luca was only asking the question because he already had an idea as to what the answer was.

“That one?” Carmy stalled, eyes still locked on their hands. “I got that one, uh, I got it, you know, right before I went to New York.”

“Yea?”

“Yea.”

“Goodbye present from Chicago?”

Carmy chuckled. “Say that like I was never gonna go back.”

Luca shrugged. “You know what I mean.”

Carmy’s face softened. “I know what you mean.”

“Just wondering, ‘cause, you know,” he met Carmy’s eyeline, “looks a little familiar, is all.”

Carmy laughed. “Does it? Does it look familiar?”

“If you wanted to copy mine, you should’ve just—”

“Copy yours?” Carmy asked, laughing like it was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard Luca say. “You stole my drawing and got it—”

“And then you copied it.”

They were both laughing, fingers still entwined. Carmy gave in, losing the argument feeling better than winning any other one ever had. “Guess it made me feel a little better.”

Luca nodded, bringing their joined hands up to his lips, the kiss so light and fleeting that Carmy would’ve chalked it up to a daydream if he didn’t know any better. “Me too.”

When Luca’s alarm went off in the morning, it woke Carmy up first for once. Opening one eye, he looked over to see Luca still passed out in the bed beside him. He let out a quiet, sleepy chuckle as he reached resting his hand against the center of Luca’s chest.

“Hey,” Carmy mumbled, the side of his face still resting in the crook of Luca’s shoulder. “C’mon.” He drummed his fingers. “You gotta go.”

Luca’s eyes weren’t even open as he wrapped his arm around Carmy, pulling him tighter against his side for a moment. “Yea. I’m going.”

Carmy would’ve stayed like that all day long if there weren’t any consequences to it. “I see that, yea.” Carmy could’ve sworn that it caused him real, physical pain to unfurl himself from Luca’s hold. “Go, Chef. Get ready.”

Luca groaned but he started to force himself to be fully conscious. “Heard.”

Carmy was only half awake, laying on his stomach with his arms tucked underneath his pillow as he watched Luca haphazardly get ready for the day. It was going to be a long one and Carmy felt a little bad, but not bad enough to apologize.

“I’ll see you,” Luca said as he pulled his shoes on.

Carmy nodded, already about to fall back to sleep. “I’ll be here.”

Carmy went out again, took himself on a small-scale grocery trip. Went out just long enough to get a few specific things that he had in mind. When he got back, he was surprised to find that Luca had gotten back in the time that he was gone. He must’ve started his day much later than he thought.

When he walked through the door, he saw Luca sitting at the table looking through the pastry book. Carmy chuckled. “Hey.”

“You know,” Luca started, still looking at the pages in front of him, “I don’t think there’s a cat.”

Carmy let out a confused laugh as he unpacked the bag of groceries he was carrying. “What?”

Luca looked over at him. “You ever see Coco?”

Carmy paused, thinking about it for a moment before finally shaking his head. “Never.”

“Yea,” he turned the page, “I don’t think she’s real.”

“Or she’s invisible.”

“Oh, yea,” Luca nodded, laughing, “that makes more sense.”

Carmy had stopped keeping track of how many days he’d spent in Copenhagen. If he started to count, reality would start to set in and if that happened the delicate bubble that was keeping he and Luca safe would inevitably pop. Luca hadn’t brought up New York, hadn’t brought up any of it. And Carmy was wondering if he was just as afraid for it all to crumble away. Or maybe Luca was just letting this be what his life was now. Carmy wished that he could do the same.

There was Luca. And there was the boat. And there were quiet nights and a cat that was nowhere to be found. But there was also Noma and ridiculous hours and minds racing with the thoughts of ingredients and recipes. There was a balance that was so carefully struck but Carmy knew that he wasn’t going to be able to maintain it forever—he wasn’t Luca. He also knew that it was all temporary. Noma wasn’t forever. Copenhagen wasn’t forever. He didn’t want to keep going on that train of thought, knowing where the final destination of it was.

It was easy to let himself stave off the thoughts most of the time. He’d get halfway down a spiral and then Luca would say something to get his attention, or his arm would sling over Carmy’s side in his sleep, and it was like a reset. Turning the timer back again. But eventually it was going to have to go off.

Carmy was packing up what precious little he’d brought with him to Copenhagen in the first place. Luca sat on the edge of the bed watching, neither of them really saying much about any of it. What was there to say?

He was getting ready to pull the zipper on his suitcase when Luca held the book out to him, the same one he’d given Carmy when he was leaving Chicago. Carmy shook his head. “Keep it. Your turn to learn something from it.” He knew that more than once over the last few weeks Luca had brought it to work with him. Neither of them ever said anything about it.

Luca’s smile was small as he shook his head, continuing to hold the book out to Carmy. “It’s yours.” When Carmy still wouldn’t take it from him, he tossed it into his suitcase for him. “Perfect that recipe before you come back next time.”

Carmy chuckled but there was a heaviness to it as he nodded. “Right. Right. Next time.”

“Don’t gotta wait till you have another breakdown, by the way.”

Carmy laughed, looking over at Luca. “Might be the fastest way to get me back here.”

Luca nodded, a tiny grin on his face. “Might be.”

For the first time in a long time there was a weight to the silence that was between them. Carmy found himself wanting to say thank you, wanting to apologize, all the stuff that Luca never asked him for. He didn’t know what else there was to say. He felt like they didn’t really have to say the rest of it.

“I’m, um, I’m glad I called you,” Carmy finally said.

“Me too.”

“I won’t wait so long next time.” He wanted it to be true. He hoped that it was.

Luca smiled. “Good.”

Carmy was smiling but he could feel the familiar burn of tears wanting to form. He shook his head slightly, gaze dropping when he couldn’t hold Luca’s stare anymore without feeling like he was going to break. “Fuck,” he muttered, pressing the heels of his palms against his eyes. “Shit. I’m,” he shook his head, looking up at the ceiling before looking back at Luca again, “I’m sorry.”

Luca shook his head. “It’s alright.” Getting up, he made sure to keep his head low enough to not smack it off the ceiling. He’d nearly perfected that. He pulled Carmy in, repeating the words when he felt the way Carmy sagged against him. “It’s alright.”

**

Carmy was yanked back to the present, back to reality by the sound of something crashing in the next room over. His fingers curled tighter around the book in his hands, like if he held onto it tight enough he’d get sent right back into the past again.

He could hear the yelling on the other side of the wall. The words being said didn’t reach his ears. They didn’t need to—it wouldn’t matter if they did. He looked back down at the book in front of him, eyes roaming over the pages. He still remembered the recipe. He still never figured out what it had been missing.

Syd materialized in the doorway of the office, looking as exasperated as she ever had. “Got a question, Chef.”

Carmy had to try harder than he cared to admit to look up from the pages in front of him. “I was thinking about Marcus.”

Syd blinked once, shaking her head slightly at the change in subject when they hadn’t gotten fully started on the thing that she had popped in to talk about in the first place. “Okay?”

“Yea.” Carmy nodded, closing the book and drumming his fingers against the cover. “Yea.”

Syd’s eyes widened, waiting for an explanation that never came. “What were you thinking about Marcus?”

“We should send him somewhere. Get him, you know, get him inspired.”

Syd shrugged, nodding. “We could do that. Got any ideas?”

“A few,” he replied with no hesitation. “Yea, I got a couple.” He paused, thinking about the paper covered in drawings, about the book with the impossible recipe, about the number in his phone that he hadn’t dialed in far too long. “I was thinking maybe Copenhagen?”

Syd smiled at that. “Shit, yea. That’d, that’d be dope.” She thought on it for a moment. “You know someone, I’m assuming?”

Carmy chuckled, nodding. “Yea. I know someone.”

Syd nodded. “Let’s do it.”

Relief and excitement both rushed through Carmy all at once. “Heard.” Clearing his throat, he called out, yelling above the rest of the noise, “Yo! Marcus!”

Within seconds Marcus appeared back in the doorway of the office. “Yes, Chef?”

“We’re sending you to Copenhagen,” Carmy said with a definitive nod.

Marcus’s eyes went wide. He looked back and forth between Carmy and Syd like he was waiting for this to be the punchline of a joke. “For real?”

Carmy nodded. “For real.”

His entire face lit up. “Alright. Heard, Chef.”

The smile on Carmy’s face was soft as he nodded once more. “Alright.”