#really excited to finally get to see one of my tapes through! especially for such a good show as this one was

[writingonleaves]

i've been yours since you stepped through the door tonight - andrei svechnikov

pairing: andrei svechnikov x original female character

warnings: swearing, drinking alcohol, lotta fluff, inaccuracies regarding anything athletic trainer related (timeline of training, terminology, etc), proofread maybe once, mentions of injuries, author has never been to raleigh, mostly based off the first hald of the 2023-2024 season but i couldn't be bothered to keep track how often svech had been in and out lmfao

title: "almost touch me" by maisy kay, also inspired by "lowkey" by NIKI

word count: 16k

author's note: this idea's been swirling around my head for awhile now, but @wyattjohnston's summer fic exchange 2024 inspired me to really revive it. @callsign-denmark, this is for you, my friend. i hope you enjoy it!

~*~*~

“Chrissy!”

Christina turns around from where she’s restocking ice packs in the training room. She nods at the smiley Russian. “Svech.”

He walks to her and swings an arm around her shoulder in a friendly side-hug. “Good summer?”

“It was alright,” her summer back home in the Delaware suburbs wasn’t anything to write home to. And Andrei Svechnikov is technically a coworker who doesn’t need to know everything. “Good to be back though.” 

“I know what you mean,” he says. Andrei leans back against one of the treatment tables. “You graduated, right? College?”

She blinks. When did she ever mention that to him last season? “I did. Back in May. The week after playoffs ended.”

“Congratulations.”

She smiles genuinely, turning to face him completely. “Thank you. Did you need something?”

“Nope,” he says with a smile that somehow still stuns Christina even after a season of seeing it so much. “I just wanted to say hi and welcome back.”

“Well, welcome back to you too.” As he’s turning away to go to fitness testing, she calls out. “Hey! Come back after you’re done. Should check on the knee before you go home.”

He halts, turning back around with a raised eyebrow. “Is that part of my regimen to get back to playing?”

“Has Doug told you?”

“Told me what?”

Clearly not then. Trust her boss, who’s lovely but also like a purposefully annoying father, to leave it to her to break the news. “They put me in charge of you this season.”

“Me?”

“Well, your recovery. And not completely. Obviously, Doug will still have final say. But if anything’s going on, I’m your person. Especially as you’re getting back into it.”

“Oh?” Andrei smirks and Christina refuses to be affected by it. 

“Is that gonna be a problem?”

He shakes his head slowly. “Of course not. I trust you.”

“Then I better see you before you leave today.”

“Deal.” He shoots her one last smile. “Bye Chrissy.”

“See you later, Svech.” Andrei brushes shoulders with Brady and they exchange excited greetings. She waits until Andrei leaves the room and smiles. “What can I do for you, Brady?”

“Got any tape?”

“Plenty.” She heads to the cabinet. “Take a seat.”

Christina Hawthorne feels very fortunate to even be back in this training room. After a co-op with the Hurricanes last season with their athletic training team, she graduated from UNC Chapel Hill in the spring. They liked her enough to offer her a position on the team for this season while she prepares for her certification test in January. They’re putting an immense amount of trust in her, and she couldn’t be more grateful. 

She loves the guys, so it’s nice to see that they seem to like her enough to keep her around. 

When she has a few free minutes with no players trailing into the training room, she wanders over to the gym. She may have had dreams to be a professional ballerina when she was very young, but actually working with professional athletes everyday is definitely a humbling experience. 

She’s sure to stay out of the way as the players are getting tested, leaning against the wall and sorta zoning out. She takes note of Andrei’s visible frustration at himself for not getting some of the results he wants. She knows that he won’t be ready for the first few games, and he knows too. But she’s sure he’s not happy about it. 

As promised, Andrei does come back to the training room after his fitness tests. She wrinkles her nose as Sebastian ruffles her dyed blonde hair in thanks for helping him stretch out before he leaves. She brushes her fingers through her hair to try and tame it. “Oh good, you’re back.”

“I promised, no?” He takes a seat on the table and puts his leg up. 

“How did today go?”

He huffs. “Fine.”

She presses her thumb against a particular part of his knee and he hisses. She immediately stops and does the same to the other side. No reaction there. She quickly turns to scribble something down in her notes. “I know this is annoying. But you’ll be back on the ice soon.”

“Not frustrated at you,” Andrei says, running a hand through his sweaty hair. “Just myself.”

“Don’t be,” Christina says, gesturing for him to lie down. “Have you been doing the stretches you’re supposed to be doing?”

“How do you know what I’m supposed to be doing?”

“Because I look over your notes and your trainers and the medical staff are in constant contact.”

He chuckles. “Right. Yes, I have been.”

“You lying to me?”

“Never.”

She bends his knee against his chest. “Then believe me. You’ll be back on the ice soon.”

“Okay,” he replies simply. “I believe you.” 

She twists slightly. “Any pain?”

“No.” 

Christina grins, then twists it the other way. “How about now?”

“No.”

“Music to my ears,” she gestures for him to sit up. “You’re good to go.”

“You sure?”

“Unless there’s something else you want me to look at.”

He shakes his head. “No. I think I’m good.”

“Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He gets up and flashes her a smile. “See you, Chrissy. Thanks. As always.”

She waves him off. “Just doing my job. Have a good night.”

…..

College was hard, but having a full-time job while trying to study for a certification is a whole new game. Trying to fit in study time while doing a job that already has weird hours is also another thing. Christina’s lucky that the athletic training and medical team understands and lets her study when the players are on the ice or she’s not needed. She even has her own little table in the trainers’ office this year, where she’s often found pooling over textbooks and scribbling notes. 

Training camp and pre-season is a chaotic time for a lot of reasons. There’s more players to keep track of and people are dusting off their rust. No one ever wants to get hurt of course, but especially not during pre-season. Which means everyone is also taking extra precautions. With new faces comes new routines and an adjustment period. 

Christina has a few moments of quiet, the last pre-season game occurring later that evening against Nashville. Players aren’t coming into the arena for at least another hour, and she pours over a chapter in her textbook. She has a pink highlighter in her mouth and a blue one in her hand when someone knocks on the wall. 

She looks up to see Andrei, who looks amused. “Sorry. Are you busy?”

She spits out the highlighter gracefully and caps them both. “Not at all. What’s up?”

“Are you sure?” He nods over to her books. “You look busy.”

“What’s up, Svech?” She repeats. 

He takes the hint. “Can you stretch out my hamstring?”

“Is it-”

“No. It’s not bad enough to need Doug. Just a little tight. And you said I should go to you whenever I need something.”

She stands up as they both head into the training room. “I did say that, yes. Which one?” He points at his right hamstring and she starts. 

“What were you doing earlier? With the books?”

“I’m taking a certification exam in January.”

“For what?”

“To become an official athletic trainer.”

“You’re not one already?”

“I am not,” she says. “Don’t worry. That’s why Doug and the rest of the team do all the nitty-gritty stuff.”

“I’m surprised,” Andrei says. “I thought you were, like, official. You seem to know everything.”

She chuckles, feeling a knot and focusing on that area. “That’s kind of you. I definitely don’t though.” She sees his breath hitch and grimaces. “Sorry. Just a few more seconds.”

“It’s your job,” he says in a strained voice. “You don’t have to apologize.”

“Well, I still feel bad when my job elicits pain in others,” she says. After two minutes, she nods. “Need more?”

He moves his leg around and shakes his head. “I think I’m good. Thanks.”

“Of course.” She looks at the clock hanging up on the wall and furrows her eyebrows. “You’re in early.”

Andrei shrugs. “I like to come in early.”

“I know,” the right side of her lip quirks up as tilts her head to the side. “This is really early though, even for you.”

“Well, you’re in too,” he says. “So why can’t I be?”

She chuckles. “I’m not saying you can’t, Svech. I’m just saying I didn’t expect to be seeing any hockey player for at least another hour.”

“Was feeling too restless at home,” Andrei says. 

She suddenly gets an idea. “Are you busy right now? Am I keeping you from anything?”

Ha shakes his head, “Not at all.”

“Wanna help me study?”

“I don’t know if I can be much help.” Nonetheless, he follows her back into the offices. 

She pulls out a chair for him to sit in and opens her textbook back up. “I study best when I can talk to someone and describe a concept or topic and they tell me it makes sense. I would be a shitty athletic trainer if I can’t tell the athlete what I’m doing.”

“So all I have to do is sit here and listen?”

“And ask questions if I’m not making any sense,” she bites her lip. “Again, if you have other places to be, I get it. This isn’t the most interesting stuff but-”

“No, no.” He assures before smiling widely. She has an urge to poke her finger in his dimple. “I’d love to help.”

Christina smiles in satisfaction as she flips through her pages. Andrei sits back and makes himself comfortable. 

Yeah, she’s glad to be back. 

…..

Every year, the players, coaches and staff head out to a bar in downtown Raleigh before the start of the first regular season game. It’s to stir up excitement and camaraderie before the season starts. Christina couldn’t make it last year because she had class, but as she’s looking at herself in the mirror —a fitted white t-shirt under a green leather jacket she rarely gets to wear that her sister bought her for Christmas and light washed flare jeans — she tells herself to call the damn Uber before she backs out. 

It’s not that she doesn’t like her coworkers. She really likes them, actually. But seeing them outside of work in a social situation where she could make a fool of herself is a bit anxiety-inducing. 

Once she thanks her Uber driver, she steps out into the swanky rooftop bar that has her tapping her foot as she waits for the elevator. Once she steps up, it’s easy to find the Canes crew, various familiar faces crowded around a specific area of the spacious rooftop. Taylor, the head of social content, who Christina’s become good friends with, sees her first and waves her over, and soon Christina is enveloped in exciting chatter. Taylor, the saint they are, pushes a White Russian, Christina’s favorite drink, in her hands. 

Christina can’t feel too bad. The organization is heading the bill tonight and she’s gonna milk that for all it’s worth. 

A bit later, when she’s on her third drink of the night and feeling comfortably tipsy observing the people around her, she feels a tap on her shoulder. She turns around in her stool and immediately beams. 

“Andrei!”

Andrei laughs and returns Christina’s enthusiastic hug before he leans his hip against the bar counter. “Hey Chrissy. You having fun?”

“Plenty.” She giggles. “Especially now that you’re here.”

Maybe it’s her tipsy self or the bar lighting, but she swears his cheeks become redder. Pair that with his button up shirt that has the top buttons undone and a pair of dark jeans and Christina needs to chill. “I’ve been trying to get to you all night,” he says. “You’re a popular woman. I saw Coach laughing at your jokes.”

She shrugs nonchalantly, leaning her chin on her palm. “I’m a funny gal, what can I say?”

“A confident one too,” he says, nodding to her empty glass. “What are you drinking?”

“You do know that the tab is on the Canes tonight, right? You don’t need to butter me up with drinks.”

Andrei rolls his eyes playfully and Christina bursts out into giggles. “I’m not trying to..butter you up? What does that even mean?”

“Like, uh, flatter me or whatever to get something. Like you’re doing something only hoping that you’ll get something out of it.”

“I’m definitely not trying to do that. I’m just trying to be nice. So what are you drinking?”

She offers a toothy grin. “A White Russian, please.” She pokes his shoulder. “Kinda like you, I guess.” Andrei snorts before waving down the bartender to order her drink. She squints at the drink in his hand. “Just a beer?”

“Don’t feel like getting too drunk tonight.”

“How responsible of you.”

He smiles, and Christina is suddenly overcome by the urge to kiss him. But she shakes her head and refocuses back on whatever he’s saying. He leans in closer to hear her response and she has to swallow roughly so her voice doesn’t crack. 

Talking with Andrei is always so seamless. The conversation may shift between three different topics in two minutes but it feels natural. Christina never has an urge to overthink when she’s talking with Andrei. He’s funny and sweet and makes her feel like she’s actually being listened to. 

In a world where she’s surrounded by men on a daily basis, it’s stupidly rare to feel as heard as she does whenever she speaks to the star winger of the Carolina Hurricanes. 

After she finishes her drink, she realizes she should probably start thinking about going home. They all technically have work tomorrow, even if it’s a later start, and people are starting to filter out, having come by to say goodbye to the both of them in the last 10 minutes. 

She starts to stand up and immediately sways on her feet. “Woah,” Andrei says, immediately putting a hand on her waist to steady her. “Slowly.”

“I’m fine,” Christina says, slapping his hand but ultimately grabbing onto his wrist as she steadies herself. “I should probably get going.”

Andrei’s eyebrows furrow. “You didn’t drive here, right?”

Christina snorts, “Of course not. I took an Uber.”

“Where do you live?”

“The Six Forks area.”

He pinches their empty glasses and puts them on the bar counter, nodding in thanks to the bartender. “You’re on my way home. I drive you.”

“Where do you live?”

“North Hills.”

She narrows her eyes. “I’m not that drunk to know that that’s definitely not on your way. You’d be overshooting.”

“I don’t care. It’s late, and I’d feel more comfortable if I just drove you home rather than you taking an Uber.”

“Andrei.” She deadpans. “I’m a grown woman. I can get home myself.”

“I know. But just let me drive you. Please.”

She huffs. “Fine. Thank you.”

He grins, “Anytime. Let’s say goodbye to everyone and then we head out.” Christina stumbles again and his hand is immediately back on her waist. “Slowly,” he repeats. 

“I’m fine,” she repeats. 

After they both say goodbye to everyone who’s still at the bar (Taylor eyes her with a smirk, gaze shifting between Christina’s eyes and Andrei’s hand that’s hovering over her back. Christina just rolls her eyes and discreetly flips them off), Andrei leads her to the parking lot. 

Christina’s nose crinkles at the sight of the lamborghini as Andrei unlocks it. “I forgot you drive this.”

Andrei lets out a loud laugh before opening the passenger door. “Don’t worry. I drive extra safe with you in the car.”

“Thanks,” she mutters, climbing in. She’s heard about his questionable driving. She hopes she doesn’t regret this. 

The engine roars to life and Christina rolls her eyes at the sound. Andrei just shoots her a smile before backing out of the spot. He unlocks his phone and hands it to her. “Put in your address.”

She hums, typing it in before putting his phone in the center console. She closes her eyes for a few seconds, before turning her head so that she’s facing him, leaning on the headrest. “You really didn’t have to do this.”

“You’re telling me you don’t like me as your personal Uber?” Andrei asks. She watches as he turns the wheel with one hand and rests his other hand on the center console shift. “You feel okay? I can open a window if you need.”

“I’m okay, Svech. Just don’t accelerate like a mad man.”

He laughs and she can’t help but giggle along. “I won’t. Promise,” he says. “You like to talk when you’re drunk.”

“Not drunk,” she mutters. 

Andrei’s hum blends in with the engine. “Sure.”

“Not drunk,” she repeats. “Especially not in front of you all. That would be unprofessional.”

“Why you afraid of being unprofessional? The staff loves you. The team loves you.”

“I’ve worked hard to get here,” she says, forcing her eyes back open so she doesn’t fall asleep. “But the fact that I got this job in the first place is a blessing. I’m not gonna do anything to fuck it up.”

He nods. She closes her eyes. He gently jostles her awake when they’re parked in front of her apartment. He insists on walking her up to the door, and she leaves him with another ‘thank you,’ a tight hug and a sleepy smile. 

He doesn’t move his feet until after a minute of staring at her front door.

…..

Opening night is always so thrilling. Of any sport. Christina has to tell herself to stop grinning so widely when the team is getting announced, making sweater paws with a Hurricanes crewneck she found on Etsy. She rocks back and forth in the tunnel, trying to stay out of everyone’s way on the side while simultaneously trying to see the ice and crowd. 

Once the game is about to begin and the arena lights come back on, Christina shakes her head at herself to focus. It’s go-time. Like last year, she’s not with Doug on the bench — the day she gets on the bench will be the day her heart rate explodes — but she’s closeby in the tunnel or in the training room, making sure everything’s all good and she’s not needed. 

“Hey.”

She turns to see Andrei, in his gray plaid game day suit coming from the bench where he was during player introductions. She smiles, “Hi. Happy season opener.”

“Happy season opener.” He grins. “The red earrings are back.”

Christina automatically reaches to touch the red rose earrings she has on tonight. She puts on a red pair of earrings every game day, whether its a flower, a cool design or ruby studs.

It’s something she just does for fun. For herself. She’s surprised that Andrei has noticed. 

“You heading up to the press box?”

“Yeah.”

They’re interrupted by Bob, the head equipment manager, greeting them with a grin “Miss you out there, Svech.”

“Soon,” Andrei promises. 

Bob turns to her with a playful raise of his eyebrow. “That true, Chrissy?”

Christina grins. “That depends on him,” she jokes. “No, he should be good to go soon. Let me know if you need any help tonight..”

Bob waves her away. “Of course. Can always count on you. See you both later,” He then heads back to the bench. 

She takes one last look at the bench to see if anyone needs anything. No one does. She turns back to Andrei. “Thanks again for driving me home last week.”

“Of course. Did you wake up okay?”

“I don’t get hungover.”

“Lucky you.” He shoves his hands in his pockets. “Are you heading on the road trip after this?”

“I’m not, actually. I should be on all the other ones though.”

“Why not this one?”

She chuckles. “Funnily enough, because of you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s my job. I also think it’s because it’s early in the season so I’m not really needed yet. Hopefully.” She grimaces, “I just jinxed it, didn’t I?”

Andrei laughs, while nodding a greeting at one of the assistant coaches passing by. “Maybe. I feel bad you can’t go on the road, though.”

“There'll be plenty of other chances. You can make it up to me by helping me study again,” she jokes. 

“I will do it,” he says seriously. 

“I was kidding.”

“I will do it,” he repeats and clears his throat. “I should head up.”

She nods. “Enjoy watching from above.”

“Thanks. I mean it. I will help you study while you put me through painful stretches.”

“The stretches shouldn’t be that painful otherwise you’re not ready to go,” she admonishes. She internally wants to cringe at her tone switch, but she can’t help it. 

Luckily, he just grins, a twinkle in his eye. “I know, I know. I’m teasing.”

She rolls her eyes. “Leave. I have work to do.”

He laughs, “See you later, Chrissy.”

…..

Last year, when she still had school, she couldn’t go on road trips either — until it came to the playoffs. So she knows what it’s like to come to the rink when no one’s really around. 

Christina’s planning just to come in for a few hours in the morning to gather her own notes and to organize a few things. Also, she might study for a bit, wanting a different environment than her apartment. Andrei also texted her — she got the number of every single player at the start of the season — saying that he’s planning to come in to work on some things with Steven, one of the other assistant athletic trainers who’s also staying behind this road trip. 

She taps her ID to get in, sipping her iced latte as she strolls down the hallway. She smiles and nods in greeting to a few staff members who she passes. Heading into the office, she sets her stuff down and immediately pulls out some of her notes, along with going through notes that the team has been sending on their road trip. 

She hears Andrei before she sees him, the sound of him and Steven talking echoing through the hallway. They come to the office and she gives them both a wave. 

“Good morning.”

Andrei and Steven both grin. “Morning,” they respond in unison. 

“Did you get Doug’s notes last night?” Steven asks. 

“Yeah. I’m in the middle of putting them in.”

“Amazing. Thank you.” Steven pats Andrei on the shoulder. “You’re all set this morning, Svech. Just remember what I said.”

Andrei nods as Steven leaves the room. “Thanks, Steve.” Steve puts his hand up in acknowledgement. Andrei pulls over a chair and sits down. She saves her work. He looks at the pair of old pointe shoes on her desk that she had just remembered to bring in. “What are those?”

“Old pointe shoes.”

“Well, yeah. I know what they are. Are they yours?”

She goes to play with one of the fraying ribbons. “They are. These are the last pair I wore before I left for college. I brought them in as something to put on my desk.”

“I didn’t know you danced.”

“Well, you don’t know that much about me.”

A pause, before the most beautiful smile spreads across Andrei’s face. “What makes this pair so special?”

Christina smiles bittersweetly. “I was pretty good. Like, went to international competitions good. Could’ve maybe done it for a living good. And I loved it so much. But I fucked up my ankle pretty badly when I was 15 and was never the same after that. I still danced and I made a full recovery, but, you know. At my dance studio, every graduating senior got to perform a solo at the yearly showcase and I did mine on pointe. It was a big moment for me.”

“And you did it in those shoes.”

She nods. “Yup.”

“Was professional dancer the first dream?”

“Yes and no. I think as I got older I realized I had other dreams and wanted to do other things. That didn’t fully sink into me until the injury. But it would’ve been cool, you know, be on a stage for a living.”

“Do you still dance?”

“When I can. UNC didn’t have a ballet company, so I tried to take classes out here in Raleigh. I’m a bit too busy these days, but I’d like to get back in a class at some point.”

Andrei hums, reaching to pick up a shoe. He hesitates, looking at her for permission and she nods at him to go ahead. “I just know you’re a beautiful dancer.”

She tries not to blush. But from the knowing glint in his eye, she knows she fails. He places the pointe shoe carefully back on her desk and she looks at the well-worn satin briefly, wondering what that life could’ve been like for her. 

But then her attention is brought back to Andrei as he asks a question relating to his recovery, and Christina knows she’s right where she wants to be. 

…..

The next day, when she’s not scheduled to go into work, she still somehow sees Andrei. 

Christina has just finished grabbing lunch with a college friend and decides to wander into a nearby cafe, its flowery and vine covered entrance enticing her. With a book in her tote bag and taste buds that always welcome coffee, she orders a latte and perches herself at a table by the window. 

She’s staring out the window lost in her own world when she hears his name being called out by the barista. She whips her head towards the counter. There’s not a lot of people you run into in Raleigh named Andrei. Before she knows it, she makes eye contact with him. She hates that he literally lights up before briskly walking over to her. 

A backwards cap and a gray henley has never looked so good before. It’s almost infuriating. 

He stops abruptly in front of her table, right hand bracing the chair across from her and left hand holding his coffee. “Are you waiting for someone?”

“Not at all.” She grins as he sits down. “Even on my off days, I can’t escape.”

Andre laughs, putting his coffee down on the table. “I come here all the time but I never see you here before.”

“I was in the area meeting up for lunch with a friend and the flowers outside convinced me,” she says. “Now that I know this is your spot, I’ll avoid it.”

He rolls his eyes. “Don’t do that.” He nods to her open book. “Reading?”

“Trying. Been trying to read a bit more because I never had time in college.”

“Did you like college?”

Christina smiles. “I did. Part of it was interrupted by the pandemic, but even then, I had a great time.”

“Are you from Raleigh?”

“No, I’m not. I grew up in Delaware, and my family’s all still there.” 

“Where’s that?”

She chuckles. “A small state around Maryland, Pennsylvania and New Jersey. The closest NHL teams would be the Caps and Flyers, probably. But my family are more football fans. Dad loves the Eagles.”

“So no hockey?”

“Not really. I honestly didn’t really get into hockey until working with the Canes.”

“So now what? You’re a Canes fan?”

“Because I work for them, sure. And you guys aren’t so bad off the ice either.”

Andrei laughs and it’s such a delightful sound. She puts her chin on her palm and listens as he continues talking.

She was hoping not to have to talk to a single person for the rest of the day. She ends up at that cafe with Andrei for over an hour.

…..

Christina grimaces at her TV as she watches the game end, the Hurricanes now on a three game losing streak. It’s still early in the season, but no one likes losing. She glances at her phone as it buzzes, knowing it’s a text from Andrei. They’ve been texting sporadically all night about the game that he’s also watching in his own home. He hasn’t outright said it to her, but she imagines it’s frustrating for him because he can’t be out on the ice with his teammates. 

Christina looks at his response with a quiet laugh, shoots back a text and tosses her phone a few feet away from her with a deep breath. 

The thing is, when she lets herself really think about it, her and Andrei’s professional relationship from the start has always been different compared to her relationship with the other players. From the first time she introduced herself and saw his smile, she knew this was gonna be tough. 

The athlete part of him doesn’t faze her — she’s danced with and been taught by world renowned ballerinas and she worked in the training room of various teams at UNC. It was his ingenuity and kindness that reeled her in. The accented voice paired with his ability to make things look so easy when she knows it’s anything but, always with a smile on his face. 

Christina would be lying to herself if she says she hasn’t ever considered her and Andrei as…more. She’d be an idiot not to. Obviously, she knows Andrei is incredibly handsome. She’s known that from the very first time she saw him in the training room last season. And it doesn’t help that he’s also so nice with no pretense. Nice just to be nice. 

But it would never happen. Could never happen. He has the entire city of Raleigh falling at his feet and she works with him. 

One night when she was a bit too wine tipsy in her dorm last year, she pulled out the contract she had signed and found the tiny section that addressed romantic relationships among “any members of the Carolina Hurricanes organization” and found some super vague shit basically saying that it was okay in most instances. Which it is. One of their assistant coaches is married to the head of the PR department. 

But she has an inkling that players are a whole different subclause. 

So while they developed a good rapport last season, Christina purposefully kept her distance a bit, sparing little details about her own life and always turning it back to him. To be fair, she was careful around everyone last season, not wanting to get in the way and just wide-eyed overall. But now she’s (hopefully) gonna be around for a bit and will try to let her personality shine a bit more. Push herself to be more casual and comfortable with the staff and team. 

Like texting Andrei about things that aren’t related to his recovery. 

It started with Andrei texting something funny about one of the pregame photos of Brady that had been tweeted. His comment made Christina snort out her tea as she quickly replied back. It’s not like they’re texting often, but it always puts a smile on her face whenever his name pops up on her phone. 

She knows she needs to be careful. But before anything else, she’s just glad to have another new friend. Someone at work she’s comfortable enough to joke around with. 

That’s enough for her. 

…..

Andrei’s long-waited season debut has the fans, his teammates and the whole staff excited. But no one’s more excited than Andrei himself, who’s bouncing around all day from the moment he walks in for his daily check-in.

As she watches him skate around for warmups, she grins at his infectious happiness. He picks up a water bottle and squirts water on her when he comes back to the bench for a moment and she wants to flip him off so badly. She totally would if there weren’t cameras around and if also wasn’t, you know, unprofessional. He’s lucky she’s wearing a black sweater today. Jordan reaches to pull on the ribbon in her hair and that’s when she makes her way off the bench, causing Doug and the other staff to laugh. 

Once the game starts, she does grimace a bit as she’s watching footage of the game from the training room when she sees Andrei go in for a heavy hit. She hears the cheers from the fans and she gets it, but he’s literally just coming off a season ending injury. Yes, he’s a professional athlete, but she’s (almost) a certified athletic trainer. 

They win 3-0 and everyone’s pumped. She’s busy documenting notes as the athletes start leaving the arena. Andrei, as instructed, comes in and she makes sure everything’s okay with his knee. 

“Hey,” she calls out before he leaves. He turns back around with an expectant smile. She beams. “Good game. Glad to have you back.”

“Thank you,” he says with a grin. “Good to be back.”

…..

When you work in such a team centered environment, there’s always someone around. Always someone to talk to and joke around with. She loves it. The collaboration of the work she does is probably her favorite part. 

But she also loves time by herself. So she vows to herself that on every road trip, after some studying, she’ll take the time to explore wherever she is by herself. Whether it’s simply grabbing a coffee or walking around whatever city they’re in or just sitting outside, she’ll carve out some time for herself, while exploring cities that she’s never been to.

The first mini road trip she goes on is to Philadelphia and New York. In Philadelphia, she heads to the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Her younger sister Layla is a graphic design major at Carnegie Mellon so she’s filtered some of her love and knowledge to Christina. With her airpods in, she wanders through the exhibits on her own. 

That’s another thing about post-grad. Learning how to do things alone. 

New York has a lot more options. She only has one full day she isn’t working and another half day. During the full day when she’s actually in the city, she meets up with a friend from high school for a nice walk around Brooklyn before dinner. On the half day, after morning skate in Long Island, she wants to just people watch outside for a few hours on a weirdly warm day for November. 

The elevator doors open and Andrei comes walking out, looking down at his phone. When he looks up, a grin spreads across his face and he locks his phone. “Hi Chrissy.”

She nods. “Svech.” The elevator doors close. That’s fine. She’ll catch the next one. “Where’d you just come back from?”

“Just grabbed some lunch with the guys after practice. Where you off to?”

“Honestly, probably also gonna grab a coffee and then sit outside by the water and just daydream. I brought a book, but we’ll see if I’m in the mood.”

Andrei laughs. “Sounds like a great day.”

It is her alone time, but she asks anyways. “Would you like to join?”

His eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “Oh. I don’t want to intrude or-”

“You wouldn’t be. I’m asking you.”

“Oh. Well, um, yeah, then. Sure. Give me a minute to use the bathroom?”

“Take your time.” He shoots her a thankful smile as he briskly walks to his room while she waits by the elevators, shifting on her feet. A few minutes later, he comes back out, this time with a backwards hat on. He shoves his hands in his off-white sweatshirt and she presses the elevator button, purposefully not looking at him.

There’s something about a backwards hat. It’s actually really annoying how attractive it is.

“How’s your first road trip been?”

Christina smiles as they step into the elevator. “Good. Went to an art museum in Philly. Saw a college friend in Brooklyn and just walked around the city. The rest of the time I’ve been with you guys.”

“You like art?”

“A bit. My sister’s studying graphic design, so her love for it has bleeded into my life.”

“That’s sweet. Are you two close?”

“Yeah. I don’t know if we’re as close as you and your brother though.” She teases, and she swears she sees his cheeks tinge pink as they walk out of the elevator and out of the hotel. “She’s much cooler than I am, just started her second year at Carnegie Mellon. I was actually just texting her because she’s trying to figure out flights to Raleigh for Thanksgiving.”

“She’s coming down?”

“Yup,” they start wandering to the nearby park. “Usually, we’d go back home to Delaware. But since we have games the day before and after and they’re at home, they’re all coming down to me. First Thanksgiving in Raleigh. They’ll probably come to a game or two.”

“That’s really nice.”

“How about you? Is your mom or dad coming to visit anytime soon?”

“Not sure yet, with Geno now back in Russia. My mom was mainly here to keep me company when I was injured. I’m sure you’ll get to meet her soon though.”

They see a cafe ahead of them and she suggests they pop in to grab something. He opens the door for her and also pays for her, which is really annoying and she takes note of his coffee order so that she can get him back once they’re home. Once they receive their coffees, they’re back outside and in the park, sitting and people watching while petting the dogs that occasionally come up to them.

“Do you miss dancing? Like, at the level you were before getting injured?”

A sad smile automatically appears on her face. “All the time. But it’s changed. It used to be more painful and frustrating to think about. Now it’s more of looking back at the good memories.”

“My grandma used to dance as well. She took my brother and I to a ballet in Moscow once. I honestly don’t remember much of it. I was too young.”

Christina chuckles. “Yeah, it’s not for everyone.” She lets out a deep breath. “God, I haven’t seen a ballet in ages.”

“Can I ask how bad your injury was?”

“A recurring stress fracture that required surgery,” she says. “I don’t know if they could ever actually diagnose it officially because it was so fucked up. Or maybe I just block it out of my brain because it was such a painful time.”

“Even after a full recovery, there was no chance to go on as intensely as before?”

“There might’ve been. But I made the choice that I didn’t want my ankles wearing down on me by 25 and like I said, I had other dreams.”

“That must’ve been a hard decision to make.”

Christina swallows. It’s been awhile since she’s talked about this with anyone. “It was. I was heartbroken, honestly. It just felt like my life was over, you know? Obviously, it wasn’t. But I didn’t know that at 15. But if that hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t have thought about going the athletic training route, and in a way, what I’m doing now connects to my dance background, so I’m happy where I am now.”

His eyes light up with hope. “Do you have a video of you dancing?”

She laughs. “I actually do.” She gets her phone out and searches for a particular video. “This was around a year ago. A little across the floor combo we were doing in a class.” She hands him her phone and looks over his shoulder to watch with him. It’s a short video, only about 20 seconds long, but it combines a bit of everything — waltz, pirouettes, leaps and footwork. 

He replays it again. She has no idea what to make of that. “I was right.”

“Hm?”

“You’re a beautiful dancer.”

“Oh. That’s kind of you. Thank you.”

“I mean it,” he says. “You have beautiful…lines? Is that the right word?”

“Yeah, actually.” He gives her a triumphant smile and she can’t help but laugh. “Thank you. That's really sweet. I appreciate it.”

He watches the video again. She stares at the side of his face, trying to see what he’s seeing. She can’t quite place it. The only thing she can place is her faster than normal heart rate.

…..

A loss against the Panthers at their barn, a win against Tampa on their ice the next day and then a loss against Philly at home. Andrei still hasn’t recorded his own goal, and Christina knows it’s eating him alive. 

It’s funny, because he’s trying not to let it show, especially in front of media. But Christina knows better, especially when he starts pushing himself on the ice even more. 

She’s not usually on the bench during morning skates. More often than not, she’s in the training room or her office, studying or doing miscellaneous tasks until players file in during or after practice for various needs. But once in awhile, she likes to walk out to the ice. Today, she’s taking her studying out there to see if the crispness of the air and the sounds of hockey keep her focused. 

She’s reading over a passage in her textbook when she sees a shadow fall over the page. She looks up to see Andrei drinking some water. 

“If you spray water on this book, you’re paying for another one,” she warns. 

“Of course,” he says with an easy smile. 

“I hope you’ve been stretching out your knee,” she says. “With how hard you’re going at during practice.”

“How do you know how hard I’m going in practice?”

“It’s part of my job,” she responds dryly, backing away and glaring at Seth as he reaches out to mess up her hair. 

“Coming out here to study now?” Andrei asks.

She shrugs. “Trying something new.”

“Is it working?”

“It was,” she says pointedly. 

Brady skates to a stop in front of them and laughs. “That’s her telling us to stop annoying her.”

“You could never annoy me, Skjeisy.” Christina grins. 

Andrei pouts. “What does Skjeisy have that I don’t?”

“The most beautiful smile,” she grins charmingly. Andrei playfully narrows his eyes and Brady shoots her a wink. No one’s flirting. Christina’s met Gracia a few times and those two childhood friends are very in love with each other. But it’s worth it to see Andrei squeeze water out of his water bottle in Brady’s face. 

“When’s your exam again?” Brady asks.

“January 7.”

“That’s soon.”

She sighs, staring down at her book. “Don’t remind me.”

“You’re gonna be great,” Andrei assures her. 

“Sure, if you all actually practice and leave me to study.” As if on cue, a whistle is blown and Christina waves her hand at them. “Shoo. If Rod blames me for distracting you, I’ll be out of a job.”

She takes some notes for a few more minutes before giving up and closing her books. She puts her elbows on her knees, resting her chin on the palms of her hands as she watches them focus on winning board battles and protecting the puck. Practice is more intense than usual today as Christina loses herself in the focused energy in the air, eyes tracking the puck and the players and how they’re positioning themselves around the puck. She almost laughs at herself at how hockey she sounds. Her football loving uncle would be proud and a bit confused. 

Practice is over, and Christina decides to stay on the bench until everyone clears the tunnel, knowing that if any players need treatment, Doug has it. He would text her a random emoji if he needed her anyways. Last game, he took a liking to the red-headed fairy. 

She squints at Andrei, who’s the only player on the ice now, as he takes shot after shot from the blue line. She just observes him and the determined look on his face, the smoothness in his shot. 

As if he can feel eyes on him, he turns around and laughs, before gathering the pucks and skating over to her. “Stalking me?”

“Observing,” she corrects. “How do you feel? Physically?”

“Good.”

“Good,” she says. “You look good.”

“Oh?”

She rolls her eyes. “You know what I mean.” She trails behind him as they head to the trainers room. “Don’t forget. Doctor’s appointment tomorrow.”

“I swear you’re my personal calendar.”

“That’s actually my second job” she says flatly, a smile peeking out after he grins at her. “Go get your protein shake or whatever disgusting thing you like to drink.”

“Sassy today.”

“I want to go home,” she deadpans. “I’ve been up since 5 a.m.”

To his credit, he looks concerned. “Why so early?”

“Studying.”

“Oh,” he says softly. “Well, make sure you sleep. Sleep is important.”

She has to chuckle. “Thanks Svechy. I’ll keep that in mind.”

He flicks his hand. “Go home.”

“I don’t think you have the authority to tell me that. You’re not my boss.”

“But I am,” they both turn to see Doug peeking out of a doorway. “Get out of here, Chris.”

She narrows her eyes playfully. “You schemers.” 

“Go sleep,” Andrei says, pulling at her ponytail lightly. She whacks his hand away. 

The last thing she sees as she walks into her office is his smirk. 

….

The day before Thanksgiving, she’s preoccupied with her parents and sister flying in for the first half of the day. She picks them up from the airport and takes them all to one of her favorite lunch spots before she has to head to work and they go sightseeing on their own. She offered to get them tickets for the game against Edmonton, but they waved her off. They’ll enjoy their time at a game on Sunday. 

Thanksgiving morning is peaceful, with the Macy’s Parade on the TV as everyone is just relaxing. In the afternoon, as Christina and her mom are taking charge of dinner, someone’s knocking on her apartment door. Immediately, Christina is confused. She’s almost positive her dad and Aimee grabbed her keys before heading out for a quick walk. She calls out a “coming” as the person knocks again. 

“Andrei?” 

He shifts from side to side, flashing a quick but genuine smile. He looks extra cozy in a brown sweatshirt and a backwards hat. “Hi Chrissy. Happy Thanksgiving. I’m sorry for interrupting.”

“Not at all. Happy Thanksgiving. What are you-what’s up?” 

He holds out a cake container. “Uh, I’m heading to Staalsy’s for Thanksgiving at their place, and I made ptichye moloko, which is a cake my mom makes for me back home in Russia. I made two. I was wondering if you wanted the other?” 

Her mouth drops open. “Oh, Andrei. That’s…you didn’t need to do that.” 

“I wanted to,” he replies. “And honestly, I hope it’s good. It’s my first time making it and I had to call my mom for help. I made too much batter so, two cakes.” 

She laughs, propping her hip against the doorframe, easy smile on her face. “I bet it’s delicious. Thank you. You’re so-you really didn’t have to do this.” 

Andrei shakes his head. “I wanted to-“

“Honey?” Marianne’s voice calls out from the kitchen. “Who’s at the door?” She doesn’t bother waiting for an answer before appearing. 

Christina internally sighs. “Andrei, this is my mom Marianne. Mom, this is Andrei. He’s one of the guys on the team.” 

Andrei balances the cake on one hand while reaching out to shake Marianne’s hand with the other, easygoing smile on his face. “It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Hawthorne. I apologize for showing up without warning.” 

“Oh, no apology necessary!” Marianne smiles, and Christina can tell immediately that her mother is charmed. She wants to roll her eyes. “Are you staying for dinner? You’re more than welcome.” 

Andrei shakes his head. “No, though thank you for the offer. I’m on the way to our captain’s house. I just wanted to stop by and drop this off.” 

Marianne takes the cake from his hands with a delighted smile. “That’s so sweet of you.” 

“He made it himself,” Christina chimes in, smirking in his direction. “Hopefully it doesn’t poison us.” 

Andrei laughs. “Hopefully.” 

The door opens again, and her dad and sister are back from their walk around the block. Christina swallows. Guess he’s meeting the whole family today. 

“Andrei, this is my dad Mark and my sister Aimee. Father and Aimee, this is-“ 

“Andrei Svechnikov,” her dad finishes for her. He and Andrei shake hands and a weird feeling appears in her stomach. “I watch the Canes games from time to time.” 

“It’s nice to meet you, sir.” He then turns to Aimee and shakes her hand with a small smile. “You too, Aimee. Your sister talks about you all the time.” 

Aimee shoots her sister a look. Christina telepathically tells her to shut up. “Does she really?”

“She does. All good things.”

“It’s good to see you back on the ice again,” Mark says. “How’s the knee?” 

“Knee is good,” Andrei says, before casting a smile in her direction. “All thanks to Chrissy here.” 

“He’s lying,” she deadpans. “I just make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid.” 

“Are you staying for dinner?” Aimee asks with a hopeful look.

Christina shakes her head. “I wouldn’t subject him to that. He’s going to Captain Staalsy’s.” 

“Lame,” Aimee says. Christina elbows her. 

“Chrissy mentioned you all were coming to a game?” Andrei asks. 

“Yup. We’ll be going Sunday.” 

“Have you ever been to a Canes game?” Mark shakes his head. Andrei grins. Christina wants to poke his dimple. “Well, hopefully we put on a good show.” 

She snorts. “Alright, Andrei. Better leave before Dad starts grilling you on the powerplay.” Expectedly, Andrei’s eyes light up. He turns to her as she rolls her eyes.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna stay for dinner?” Marianne asks. 

Andrei grins. “I’m sure. Thank you though.” He looks back at Christina. “See you tomorrow?” 

“Bright and early.”

He turns back to her family with a warm smile. “It was nice to meet you all.” 

Christina nods to the door, “I’ll walk you out.” She catches Aimee’s smirk and rolls her eyes. She puts a shoe in the door so that it won’t shut on her as she faces Andrei. “Thank you for the cake. Seriously.”

“Careful,” he teases, and if butterflies flutter in her stomach from his tone that’s no one else’s business. “It could be awful.”

“It won’t be.” She grins and gives him a quick hug before she can overthink it. She pulls away before she wants to. “Happy Thanksgiving. I’ll see you tomorrow. Thank you again.”

“Happy Thanksgiving.”

She watches him disappear from the hallway before she lets out a deep breath.

…..

The crowd at the PNC arena goes nuts with Andrei scores with less than two minutes left in the third against Columbus. Christina herself bounces around on her toes in excitement, her parents and sister somewhere up in the box seats. What a way to get your first of the season. She feels weirdly proud of him. 

She only catches him as she’s heading out a bit earlier than normal to drive back with her family. And by catch him, she only means by eye contact as Andrei’s swept up in media. She stops for a moment and just leans against the doorway of the locker room, watching him answer questions

Christina’s about to push herself off the doorway when Andrei’s eyes meet hers. He’s still talking, but his smile widens, and she just shoots him a thumbs up and a grin of her own before walking to the parking garage. 

…..

Christina groans as she skims the email from the management of her apartment complex. Fixing the water pipes will shut down water for 24 hours. It’s not the end of the world, but how inconvenient. 

She leans back in her chair, mentally going through her mind to see where she could crash for a whole day last minute. The one friend she would go to immediately is away on vacation right now. 

She’s twiddling her fingers as she walks to the locker room, needing to check in with Andrei. But weirdly, he’s nowhere to be found. She’s about to walk out of the room just as Andrei walks in. 

“Oh, perfect,” Christina says. “I was looking for you.”

“Were you?”

She tries not to roll her eyes as he follows her back to her office. “Get your ass on the table.”

He laughs, following her instructions as she works on his shoulder. She must sigh without realizing because his eyebrows furrow. “Everything okay?”

“Hm?”

“Are you okay?”

“Oh, I’m fine,” she waves him off. “The pipes are getting fixed in my apartment building for a day so I gotta figure out where I’m crashing for the night. That’s all.”

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes. “That must be annoying.”

She shrugs. “It is what it is, but the friend I usually would stay with is away right now, so that kinda has me scrambling. I probably will have to get a hotel room for the night or something.”

“How about you stay with me?”

Christina has her back towards him to take some notes, before she spins back around and raises an eyebrow. “Andrei, no. I can’t-”

“I have a guest room. Multiple guest rooms, actually,” he runs a hand through his hair. “It’s no problem. Serious. It would be like I’m not even there.” She opens her mouth to protest but closes it again, weighing her options. Like he senses her hesitation, he barrels on. “You don’t have to drop money on a hotel. And only for a night, right? Just stay with me.”

She bites her lip in thought. It would save her a lot of trouble. And he’s right, it’s just for a night. “Are you sure?” She says. 

“100 percent,” he promises. 

“Okay,” she says gratefully. “Thank you. I owe you big.”

“No worries,” he says. “I text you my address. Come over whenever you’re ready. I text you the garage code too in case I’m not home.”

She’s a bit surprised that he just blindly trusts her so much, but he trusts her to handle his body and recovery, which is arguably the most important thing for a professional athlete, so staying in his home is next to nothing. 

But it’s a big deal to her. She’s reminded of that when she drives home to grab some things. She’s reminded that her phone buzzes with a text from him, the garage code like he promised, along with what her sushi preferences are — anything, it’s her favorite food. She’s reminded of that as she drives over, immediately feeling overwhelmed at how nice this neighborhood is. 

She forgets often that these players are earning more than she ever will. Andrei is a multimillionaire. The cost of his living room alone is probably worth more than a year of Christina’s current monthly rent. 

It doesn’t phase her necessarily. It’s just an observation. 

As she pulls into his driveway, she sees Andrei coming out of his garage. He perks up with a wave, waiting for her to park her car. He approaches her as she comes out of her car with her backpack.

“Just in time. I grabbed dinner.”

She glances at the bag in his hands and she tries not to gulp at the familiar (expensive) restaurant logo “I could’ve grabbed it on the way here.”

He waves her off as they walk through the garage, him swinging her backpack over his shoulder. “You’re a guest in my home. Why would I make you do that?”

Christina’s not used to this. The chivalry. The acts of service. It all feels a bit too much, especially as he gives her a brief house tour and shows her the guest room. It’s all so minimalistic and clean and expensive and she was not prepared to be staying the night in Andrei’s house today. Or ever.

She jumps in the shower really quickly to wash off the day. It takes her a moment to figure out how to control the temperature. She’s afraid to mess anything up. When she walks back out into the main room, Andrei’s just finished setting up the table. When she spots the familiar label of her favorite wine, she blinks. 

He notices her silence and chuckles sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck. “I asked Taylor what your favorite wine is.”

“You could’ve asked me,” she says softly. 

He shrugs. “I wanted to surprise you, I guess.”

She hoists herself up on the stool of the island, trying to control the butterflies in her stomach. “Well, thank you. You didn’t have to do that.”

Being with Andrei in his home is expectedly intimate. She feels very comfortable at work to poke fun at the players and staff. But it’s different sitting for meals in the kitchen at the office compared to sitting across a kitchen island eating sushi that Christina only has when her parents foot the bill. Something as simple as Andrei’s sushi plopping into his soy sauce and her bark of laughter feels almost too much, especially when he chuckles with her at his misery. Because it’s just the two of them in his home and it’s almost too much. 

But even if it’s too much, she doesn’t feel uncomfortable at all. In fact, it’s probably weird how comfortable she does feel, as her and Andrei chat about everything from the team to his brother to her college days. When his dimple pops out and his brown eyes brighten with curiosity, she has to remind herself that she works with him. They’re co-workers at best. Friends possibly. 

She gets up to clear their dishes away, but Andrei’s quicker and pushes her shoulder down so she’s sitting again. She gives him a look. “Andrei. Come on. You bought dinner and you’re letting me stay for the night. I can wash dishes.”

He shakes his head, “You don’t need to do anything but sit there all pretty.”

She just blinks and sips her wine because what the fuck. 

They debate putting on a movie or show, but end up just hanging out on the couch and continuing to talk because he’s just so easy to talk to. Christina stops herself after her third glass of wine when she remembers she has work tomorrow, and she thinks he’s so sweet for grabbing her a glass of cold water without her even asking. 

When they’re winding down for the night, he hovers by the door of the guest room, making sure she doesn’t need anything. When she assures him that she’s all good, he leaves her with a “goodnight” and the cutest smile and Christina knows that she’s fucked. 

The next morning, she wakes up to the smell of coffee. When she walks out, yawning and rubbing her eyes, she sees two plates of waffles. 

“Good morning,” she says with an air of surprise. “This looks great.”

He chuckles. “Eat it first before you say anything.”

She hums, making sweater paws with her UNC sweatshirt and smiling when he slides over a mug of coffee. 

“You sleep well?”

“I did, thank you. You have a very comfy mattress.”

His dimple pops out and Christina can feel herself falling. “You’re welcome anytime.”

That statement doesn’t help either. 

After they finish their breakfasts, she yet again isn’t allowed to help with dishes, so she wraps her hands around her coffee and watches him. “Thank you, though, Andrei. Seriously. For letting me stay over. You saved me a lot of trouble.”

“Of course,” he says over his shoulder, catching sight of her packed backpack in the living room. “Are you heading out so soon?”

“Yeah. I have to get into work earlier than you do, remember?” She teases, as she finishes her coffee, hands him the mug and goes to grab her backpack. “I also wanna stop by my place to drop this stuff off and pick some stuff up before heading to the rink.”

He turns off the faucet, wipes his hands and walks over to her. “I was gonna say I’ll miss you, but I see you in probably an hour.”

She laughs, not quite processing what he just insinuated. “Probably.”

“Can I ask you something before you leave?”

“Yeah. What’s up?”

“Would you want to go on a date with me sometime?”

Her jaw drops open a bit. Oh. “Oh.”

He backtracks. “You can say no. I won’t be hurt. Or, well. I just want to ask to see if you give me that chance. I really like you, Chrissy.”

“No, it’s not that. It’s just…Andrei. We work together.”

“I know, I know.”

She lets out a sigh, tipping her head back and squeezing her eyes shut. “Andrei-”

“One date,” he practically begs. “Let me take you on one date to prove that this is real to me.”

She swallows, her resolve starting to crumble down from his pleading eyes. “I could lose my job.”

“You won’t. And I wouldn’t let that happen.”

She can’t help but snort. “Carolina loves you, but not that much.”

He pouts before taking her hands. “Christina,” he says sincerely. “Just one chance. And then if it doesn’t go well, we stay coworkers and friends and this never happened.”

“And if it does go well?” She bites her lip.

The dimple appears on his cheek again. She wants to kiss it.  “Then we figure out where to go from there.”

“There’s just, it’s not- you’re wonderful and kind and sweet, but I’m putting a lot on the line here.” She feels vulnerable, her voice shaking at the edges. “I’ve worked too hard to have this fall apart on me.”

“I know. I understand.” And huh, Christina thinks. He actually probably does understand more than most, because if Andrei is anything, he's a hard worker. He gently places a hand on her waist and she can’t fucking think. “I wouldn’t ask you just to ask you or risk anything.”

“You like me that much, huh?” Christina jokes weakly.  

Andrei squeezes her waist lightly “I do.”

Oh. Okay. 

A few more seconds pass with Andrei staring at her hopefully and Christina blinking rapidly. He’s so gentle with her it makes her wanna scream into a pillow. 

“One date,” she relents. His eyes sparkle and her smile grows with his. “You have one shot, Svech. Use it wisely.”

“Oh believe me, I will.” He says confidently. “When are you free?” 

“My work schedule is the exact same as yours.” 

He lets go of her hands to dig into his pocket for his phone, checking the Canes schedule that’s synched up to his calendar. “When we’re in New York. Two weeks from now.” 

“New Year’s Eve?”

“Yeah. I know we’re already all going out at night but during the day. Just you and me.”

Immediately, her mind goes into planning mode. “Sure, yeah. That works. I have some friends who live in the city I could ask for recommendations for-”

“No,” she tilts her head in confusion at his firm tone. “You don’t worry about anything. I take care of all of it.”

“Andrei.”

“I take care of it, Chrissy.” he repeats, shoving his phone back in his pocket. “All you need to do is show up.”

She opens her mouth and closes it, before, “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay. Will you at least tell me what to wear?”

“Anything. You always look beautiful.”

She rolls her eyes at the fact that he’s already loading on the charm and they’re not even on the date yet. “Nice try. I’m not wearing my work attire to our date.”

“Seems like you already know what you’re wearing, then.”

She huffs before softening. “Thanks for letting me stay the night.”

Andrei clicks his tongue. “Of course. I see you later?”

Christina chuckles. “Yup.” 

They walk to his front door, and he hesitates for a second before leaning down to give her a quick kiss on the cheek. She’s absolutely floored. “Get home safe.”

She gives him one last smile as goodbye. It isn’t until she’s in her car when she leans her forehead on her steering wheel and smiles into it does it fully sink in. 

She has a date in two weeks.

…..

No one likes a loss, and even if Christina is kinda immune to it by now, it’s not fun. But the holidays are near and her heart feels light as she packs up her things. Her flight takes off early in the morning, so she’s hoping to catch a few hours of sleep before then. A knock on the doorframe has her looking up to see Andrei dressed back in his game day suit with a light smile on his face. 

“Hey,” she greets. “Everything alright? You need treatment?”

“Everything’s fine. I’m okay.” He says, shuffling in and looking a bit sheepish.

Christina hesitates. She’s not sure how Andrei is after a loss, if he likes to talk about it or forget about it. “You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.” 

“Okay.” She looks down at his outstretched hand holding a box she didn’t see at first. “What’s that?”

He clears his throat. “It’s, uh, your Christmas present. You fly back home in the morning, yes?”

“Yeah,” she shakes her head. “Andrei, I-I don’t need…I didn’t get you anything.”

“That’s okay.” The annoying thing is that she knows he means that. She tentatively takes the box out of his hand and opens it. Inside is a pair of silver dewdrop earrings. 

“Andrei.”

“Uh, I asked Taylor and they told me you wore silver and gave their approval. But if you don’t like them, I can return them and exchange them for-”

“Andrei,” he halts as she looks at him. “They’re beautiful. Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome.”

“You really didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I wanted to.”

She chuckles shakily, closing the box. “We haven’t even been on our date yet.”

“So?” he shrugs, like it’s not a big deal. But it is a big deal. “You’re important to me. I get everyone important to me Christmas presents.”

Christina wants to melt at the soft look in Andrei’s eyes. She’s a bit at a loss for words, so she just gives him a tight hug. She lets herself fall into him as his arms wrap around her securely, resting her chin on his shoulder and letting her eyes fall shut at how safe she feels. 

She reluctantly pulls away and puts some space between them. They are still at work after all. “Thank you. Seriously. You’re so sweet.”

“I’m glad you like them,” he says with a light in his eyes. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything.”

He shakes his head. “No need.” She gives him a look as he chuckles. “I promise. A date with you is enough presents to last me a lifetime.” Jesus Christ. Where does he pull this shit out of? He just grins. “You heading out? I walk you to your car.”

She swallows and nods, packing up the last of her things, carefully placing the box on top. She makes sure she’s not looking at him when she says her next statement. “You’re way too nice to me.” Silence for a bit besides her rustling her things. Once she’s ready to go, she looks back at him, who’s staring at her thoughtfully. It throws her off guard. “What?”

“I’m not too nice to you,” Andrei says, eyebrows furrowed adorably and sincerely. “I’m just..how I am.”

“It’s not a bad thing,” Christina quickly assures him as she flicks off the lights. “I just, uh, am not used to it? None of my exes have ever even treated me this nicely.”

“That’s a shame,” he says. “You deserve someone being kind to you. No such thing as too nice.”

She just swallows as they head down the hallway and to the parking lot. Because what can she say to that? Andrei has always been sweet and polite since the day they met, but she didn’t expect him to be so sincerely earnest. 

She slides into the passenger seat of her car and he leans down, resting his hand against the hood. “You’ll be good to go home?”

“Yeah.”

“Merry Christmas, Christina,” he says with a grin.

“Merry Christmas, Andrei.”

…..

Andrei gets a hat trick against Montreal and looks right at her as his teammates converge upon him. She has no idea how he even finds her so quickly considering she’s not standing where she usually would be, but he finds her anyway. 

She grins at him and he gives an imperceptible nod paired with his signature charming smile.

Three more days.

…..

Half an hour before Andrei’s supposed to be at her hotel room door, Christina is already ready. 

She hadn’t managed to squeeze many details out of him, because he insisted that he would take care of it. It’s not like she doubts him, perse. But she’d at least like to know how to dress so she doesn’t feel out of place. She told him that, and he caved, saying “not a sweatshirt, but a nice sweater or dress will be fine, but not overly fancy,” which, actually, doesn’t say much. But she could work with that. 

And she did. When packing for this mini-road trip, she put thought into what she would wear today. She’s settled for a black-neck long sleeve with her favorite dark green pants, paired with black ankle-high boots and her favorite brown peacoat. 

As she sits on her bed and waits, she starts becoming more fidgety. She’s nervous, yes, but not because she doesn’t know him. She has a feeling that he’s going to be the perfect gentleman and the date will go well. 

She’s nervous that it’ll go too well and she’ll get ahead of herself. 

Before she knows it, she hears a knock on her door. With a deep breath, she grabs her bag and walks over to open the door. 

She swings it open and swallows. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Andrei says softly. She takes a moment to look at his outfit — a navy blue button up with a gray jacket draped over his arm. With black dress pants and sneakers, she’s thankful that it seems like their outfits match on the formal scale. He clears his throat. “You look beautiful.”

“Thank you,” she says softly. “You look great too.”

“Shall we?”

Christina reaches into her purse to make sure she has her room key, phone and wallet before nodding. “Where are we headed?” She asks as they walk down the hall. 

“We’ll have to head on the train a few stops to Lincoln Center.” Lincoln Center? She furrows her eyebrows. He clears his throat as they step into the elevator, him leaning against the wall. “Today’s the last day they show The Nutcracker. With your dancing history, I figure, I don’t know, maybe it would be fun?”

Suddenly, a frog appears in her throat. It’s probably the most thoughtful first date she could go on. She looks into his earnest eyes, as if he thinks she’ll hate it or not wanna go. 

“It’s perfect,” she manages to get out. He’s perfect. “I-I haven’t seen a ballet in ages.”

“I know,” he responds. “You told me, remember?”

Oh. She did. And he remembered. She bites her lip to keep herself from blurting out that this might be the best date she’s ever been on and they just stepped out of the elevator. 

She can tell he’s a bit nervous, quieter than usual. They’re not quite holding hands, but their fingers keep brushing and she feels the ghost of his hand on her lower back as they head down to the subway and onto the train. 

“When’s the last time you were in New York City?” He asks. 

The train lurches and Christina takes a second to find her footing. “It’s been at least two years. I used to come up here for, funny enough, dance intensives and camps when I was in middle and high school.”

“Are you planning on getting back to classes now that it’s been a few months?”

Again, she’s impressed with the things Andrei actually remembers. She shrugs. “I definitely think I’m still too busy during the season. But maybe in the off-season.”

More people pile onto the train, causing the two to move closer towards each other. She can smell his cologne. She looks up in shock at the feeling of a feather-like kiss on her forehead. 

“Thank you.”

“For?”

“Saying yes. This will be the best date of your life, I promise.”

She just leans her head onto his elbow as the train runs on its tracks. 

As they walk into Lincoln Center, all Christina can do is gape as they find their seats, Andrei leading the way — in the first row of the second wing. It’s a perfect view of the stage with all the formations, lighting and sound. Andrei plays with her hand the whole time and it feels so good to see a dance performance again. During intermission, she gushes over the choreography and costumes as Andrei just smiles, listening intently to her observations. When she suddenly stops and apologizes for rambling, he tells her to keep going. (“I love how much you love dance.”)

Afterwards, they head to a nearby dessert place and share a bowl of shaved ice and ice cream. She’s having such a good time talking with him that it isn’t until the sky becomes dark does she realize they both have to head back to the hotel before anyone questions them and they can get ready for the team and staff New Year’s Eve party tonight.

She swipes her keycard, closing the door as he steps into her room. “Thank you for this. I had a really good time.”

“Yeah?”

She nods, biting her lip with a small smile. “I did.”

“A good time enough that you want to do it again?”

“I think so.”

“Yeah?” His eyes are practically sparkling and Christina’s elated that it’s because of her. “I didn't blow my shot?”

She chuckles, “You did.” She doesn't want to tell him that if she’s being honest with herself, he had her from the very start. 

“Great,” he grins. “Great. I’m glad you had a really good time. I was really nervous.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Oh,” she says, walking closer to him and instinctively wrapping her hands loosely around his neck. “You didn’t have to be.”

“You-you always make me a bit nervous, even if I don’t show it,” he admits. 

Christina’s stomach tingles. “Can we go on another date when we’re back in Raleigh? Maybe after I take my exam?”

“Yes,” he rushes out. “Of course. Yes.”

She catches his eyes flickering to her lips for a split second and decides to just bite the bullet. She presses a delicate kiss on his lips, and backs away to see a light pink dusting his cheeks. “I’m gonna go get ready for tonight.”

He chases her lips, causing her to giggle. “Bye,” he mumbles against her lips. “I see you in a bit.”

As soon as her door shuts, she lets out a little squeal into her hands. Happy New Year’s Eve to her, indeed.

…..

Christina’s certification exam happens to fall on a rare week where the Canes have no games, which she’s grateful for because she doesn’t want to miss out on any. There are some practices, but she’s excused from those to study. 

The day after her exam, she feels a large weight lift off her shoulders. She won’t get the results for a few weeks, but she feels confident that she did well and she can pat herself on the back for a bit. 

She comes into practice in high spirits, having gotten a coffee and pastry from her favorite cafe on the way as a treat. She takes congratulatory messages from all the staff and some players with a smile. When Andrei skates up at the start of practice to her on the bench, he just smiles at her, shooting her a quick wink before skating off. She hopes she’s not blushing. 

He’s left her alone in the meanwhile while she’s been studying, but she’s hoping to catch him before he leaves the rink today to see when they can go out again.

Unfortunately, the team is in the video room as Christina heads to her office to pack up for the day. She guesses she’ll have to talk to Andrei tomorrow. She could just text or call him, but that doesn’t feel good enough. 

When arriving at her car, she stops short and squints. There’s a bouquet of flowers wrapped in brown paper tucked inbetween the door handle, red roses and sunflowers to be exact. 

“Oh good, you haven’t left yet,” she whips around to see Andrei jogging towards her. 

She turns back around to her car, staring at the flowers as he stops beside her. “What’s this?”

“A little gift. To congratulate you on finishing your exam.”

She swallows, suddenly emotional. “They’re beautiful.”

“Beautiful flowers for a-”

She whacks him lightly. “Don’t finish that sentence, you sap.”

He laughs. It’s becoming one of her favorite sounds. “But I mean it.”

“I know,” she finally turns to look at her and grins. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

She tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. “Are you around this week to grab dinner or something?”

He runs a hand through his hair. “You know my schedule more than anyone.” She rolls her eyes as he chuckles. “Of course I am. We’ll find time.”

She hums. “Okay.”

“What should I tell the guys for now?” A sudden flurry of anxiety flashes through her veins. Andrei must see her face change, because he continues quickly. “I don’t have to say anything. We can keep it quiet.”

“Would you mind if we did? Just because it’s so…”

“I don’t mind,” his dimple pops out. “Promise. Let’s just go on another date first. Sound good?”

She bites her lip with a nod. “Yeah.”

“Yeah,” he repeats. His hands itch to reach towards her before he remembers that they’re just outside of the rink and that anybody could walk out at any minute. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“See you tomorrow. Thank you for the flowers, seriously.”

“I hope you’re proud of yourself,” he says, backing away. “You’re so smart and you worked really hard.”

She looks down at her shoes, warmth spreading through her body. “Thanks. Have a good night.”

“You too.”

(When Christina goes home and arranges the flowers in a vase, she sends Andrei a picture. He responds immediately with the heart-eyed emoji, and she feels the excitement of something new starting.)

…..

Christina’s a smart girl. When she gets a text from Doug a few weeks (and more than a handful of dates with Andrei) later to come to one of the conference rooms, she has a feeling it’s about her and Andrei. Though who would’ve said something? 

Her stomach drops on the walk over, her palms sweating as she fiddles with her staff badge. When she walks in, she sees Doug, Mary, head of the HR department, Coach Brind’Amour and Andrei himself all around a rectangular table.

Mary offers a warm smile. “Hi Christina.” 

Christina tries to smile back while shutting the door behind her. “Hi Mary and everyone.” 

“Please take a seat,” Mary says. The only empty one is next to Andrei. Christina gingerly sits down. “I guess we’ll just cut to the chase. It’s come to our attention that you and Andrei here are in a romantic relationship.” 

She blinks. Well, yeah. But-“From who?” 

“From me.” Andrei says. She whips her head to look at him and he grimaces. “I’m sorry. I know we planned to go together next week, but I slipped up in front of Coach this morning and…yeah.” 

“Of course you did,” Christina mutters. She hears Doug trying to cover a snort. “Um, yes, uh, we are. Seeing each other. Together. Whatever you wanna call it. We were going to come to your office next week. We weren’t gonna hide it or anything, I promise.”

“I understand,” Mary says. “First of all, your job is not in jeopardy. You’re not going to get fired because of this. Especially because it’s obvious you two weren’t trying to hide anything. ” Christina knows that, but she would be lying if she said that she wasn’t a little bit relieved. “Workplace relationships occur all the time. However, as I’m sure you both understand, your particular situation is a bit different. I have to ask when you two started this relationship.” 

Christina lets Andrei take the lead, partially curious about what he’ll say. He doesn’t hesitate. “New Year’s Eve.” 

She smiles internally. It’s nice to know he considers their first official date as serious as she does. 

“You do understand that in the workplace, there are boundaries.” 

Andrei and Christina both nod. Christina continues, twisting her fingers. “Of course. I’ll obviously continue with my responsibilities as I have been since I joined the organization and continue to do the best I can do with every player and staff member. Our relationship won’t affect that at all, I promise.”

“And I also understand the boundaries,” Andrei adds. “This will also not affect my performance on the ice and off. I continue being professional with all staff.”

“You both understand that no matter what happens that your professional relationship comes first?”

“Yes.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“And you both understand that when you come into work, you’re at work and focused on work?” They both nod. Mary looks around the room. “I mean, that’s really all I got. It seems like you two understand. I’ll draw out the paperwork and get it back to you two in a few days. Doug?”

Doug clears his throat. “First of all, I called this and Steve owes me $50.” Andrei lets out a surprised laugh but Christina isn’t even fazed. “Only thing I got is that I should probably take you off as the main person of contact for Svech for his general recovery regime we started in the beginning.”

She kinda saw that coming. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Andrei about to protest but she kicks him underneath the table. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

“No worries. I’ll just take over. There’s not much to that anymore anyways, right?” She nods. He grins. “Great. As long as you keep doing the good work you’re doing, no issues here. Coach? Anything to add?”

Christina swallows looking at Coach Brind’Amour, but she breathes easier when he smiles a bit. “Nothing really from me. Svechy, you know what I expect from you. That doesn’t change. And Christina, you’ve done your job wonderfully thus far and as long as that doesn’t change, which I’m sure it won’t, no issues here. Do your teammates know, Svech?”

Andrei smirks. “Some of them have probably picked up on it. Nothing for sure though.”

Coach grins wryly. “You can be the one to tell them then, should you want to.”

“You’re gonna get chirped like hell,” Christina snickers, making everyone in the room laugh. 

Andrei looks over at her with a small pout. “And you won’t?”

“A little. But you’re the one playing with them. I’m just an lowly assistant trainer.”

Doug cackles. “Chrissy, I think you underestimate how much the boys like you. Get ready for comments everyday.”

“But not too mean,” Andrei says. 

Christina snorts. “Down, boy.” She turns back to Mary, Coach and Doug with a smile, feeling more comfortable now. “Is there anything else?”

Mary shrugs. “Besides the paperwork I’ll get you two to sign later, nope. You two are free to go. Thanks for coming in."

They all file out of the conference room while Christina and Andrei linger. Once everyone is out of earshot, she playfully shoves him. “Really?” She deadpans. 

“I’m sorry!”

She chuckles. “It’s fine. At least it’s out of the way. Would appreciate a warning next time though.”

He nods solemnly. “I know. I’m really sorry. It won’t happen again.”

She swallows, before leaning up to press a kiss to his cheek and going their separate ways. 

(Andrei lingers to watch her turn the corner of the hallway, a big smile on his face. Rod watches him)

…..

three years later 

The times that Christina is on the bench has gotten higher and higher the longer she’s been here. Hell, she’s one of few women to this day that has been on an NHL bench as a trainer, which is ridiculous since it’s 2027 and she’s just doing her job. Doug’s son is getting married this weekend so Christina knew she’d be taking over head duties for this game against the Rangers long before. 

It’s thrilling every time though, being on the bench. Everything’s so much louder and things seem to move so much faster, even though she’s been doing this for three years. Since puck drop, she’s been in the zone and thankfully so far, not needed. 

Until Andrei gets checked. Hard. Which rarely happens since he’s the one usually doing the checking. 

Fights break out on the ice, whistles are blown and Christina doesn’t need the ref’s signal — or anyone’s — to know that she needs to scurry out there fast. She’s praying that it looks worse than it is. 

She bends down next to Andrei, who’s crouched over in pain and places a gentle hand on his back. “Hey, baby. It’s me. Can you tell me what hurts?” He’s breathing heavily and doesn’t respond for a few seconds. “You have to tell me what hurts so I can help you.” He mumbles something in Russian and while Christina is 90% sure of what he’s saying, she can’t take any risks right now. “English, baby, please.”

“Chest.”

Okay. Lungs. Maybe ribs. He’s talking and breathing fine, even if heavily. “Okay,” she nods, going through her mental checklist rapidly. “Can you skate off by yourself?” He nods and she just rubs his back, giving him a few seconds. He eventually gets up on his own, which is a good sign, and she tries not to eat shit as they both get off the ice and go straight down the tunnel. 

Once he’s sat down on a training table, she puts her hands on his cheeks. “Drei. I need to hear the words from you.” 

Even in his injured state, Andrei knows. “I’m okay, solnyshka. Just hurting a bit.” 

“Okay. Let’s get your gear off and see what’s going on, yeah?” She helps him get off his gear until he’s completely shirtless. “Lie back for me.” She does her routine, pressing in specific spots and seeing how he reacts. She winces every time he hisses, even though it’s helping her determine what’s wrong. She goes through her questions, quickly determining if he’s done for the day or may be able to head back out. It's the end of the second period anyways, so they have more time to assess. 

“You got your shit rocked.” She says bluntly. She smiles lightly when she gets the reaction she wants, which is a snort out of him. 

“Yeah, which is fucking annoying.”

She swallows. “But you’re okay?”

“Yeah. Think it was more of just an impact hit.”

“Good, good.”

“What are you thinking, Doc?” Andrei jokes. “Am I good to go for the third period?”

“That really depends on you,” she says. “Like you said, it seems like it was more just an impact hit. Beside soreness and tenderness, nothing’s out of place or broken or sprained. But it’s all about how you feel.”

“Then why do you sound unsure?”

“Because I’m trying to talk to you like your trainer, not your fiance.”

Andrei softens and she has to look away. “Talk to me like you’re my fiance, solnyshka.”

“It was just a scary few seconds there, when you didn’t get up. That’s all.”

She swallows as he puts down the ice pack and puts his hands on her cheeks to make her look at him. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

She waves his apology away. “It’s okay. Getting hit is part of the gig. I know that by now.”

He rubs his thumbs on her cheek. “Still. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s just hard sometimes. Seeing you go down. Keep icing,” she instructs, backing away. Christina’s not afraid of being caught with PDA nowadays. Everyone in the organization knows they’re together after three years. But she still prefers keeping up a level of professionalism at work. 

“I think I’m gonna go back out, but I do limited minutes.”

She furrows her eyebrows. That doesn’t sound like him. “Limited minutes?” He just shrugs. “Andrei.” She deadpans.

“It depends on me, right? How I feel?” He says, throwing her words back at her as he starts putting his gear back on. 

“Yes. But you’re Andrei Svechnikov. You don’t know what the word limited means because you have no sense of self preservation.”

“Limited minutes,” he says firmly. “I don’t want you to worry about me.”

“The ring on my finger kinda indicates that I’ll always worry about you,” she responds dryly. 

He laughs, standing up. “Only for tonight, to be safe.” They hear the boys about to head out for the period and start walking out of the room. “Thank you for taking care of me.” 

“Just doing my job.”

He pulls her in to place a quick kiss on her lips. “And you do it well.”

“Good luck out there. Love you.”

“Love you more.” He runs back onto the ice with his teammates as she follows slower behind.

“He all good?” Coach Brind’Amour asks when she’s back on the bench.

“Yeah. Up to him if he wants to take every shift, but he’s cleared to go.”

Coach nods, “It never gets easier, does it?”

“Hm?”

“The look you had on your face when Svechy went down. It’s the same look I have when my son goes down. Still. And he’s been playing his whole life.”

She shrugs, trying to be casual. “It’s part of the job I signed up for.”

“Sure. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.”

They both watch as the teams skate to center ice to take the faceoff. No, she thinks. It most definitely does not. 

It’s close to midnight when she and Andrei are walking out of the arena together. She yawns as she leans into him and he puts an arm around her shoulder. Luckily they have the day off tomorrow. Maybe she’ll force Andrei to try a new recipe for dinner together that she found online.

It’s not until she’s in bed, listening the shower run as Andrei quickly rinses, does she see her notifications. Fifteen texts from six people.

She clicks Layla’s first. It’s a link to a short Twitter video. She clicks on it. 

It’s a short clip of the broadcast right after Andrei’s injury, a replay she winces at, cameras showing her running out and all the chaos before they head into the tunnel. But it’s what the commentators are saying that Layla — and all her other friends who sent her messages — are freaking out about. 

“Svechnikov seems to be alright, able to get up on his own and slowly skate to the bench, which is always a good sign.”

“Christina, the Hurricanes’ assistant athletic trainer is out there with him, with Doug, the head trainer out for a few games for family obligations. Fun fact, she’s one of the few female athletic trainers in the NHL. Fantastic at her job and an incredible person as well.”

“Another fun fact to those who may not know, Christina and Svechnikov are engaged, getting married sometime next year. And that’s a beautiful Canes love story if I’ve ever heard one.”

“I can imagine it isn’t easy to have to see your fiance go down like that, even if it is a part of her job. They’re both heading down the tunnel now, so we’ll see if he comes back out for the third period. Hopefully he’s okay.”

She locks her phone. It’s been known to the general public that Andrei is engaged. He had posted on Instagram when he proposed. But it had been a silhouette shot and he hadn’t tagged her out of respect for their privacy. Christina’s Instagram is private too, so very few people they don’t personally know had put it together. 

Until now, that is.

“You saw it too?” Andrei says, coming out of the bathroom.

“Yeah. A bunch of people sent it to me.”

“And?”

“They didn’t say anything that wasn’t true. What do you think?”

He slides under the covers and kisses her forehead tenderly, “I love being known as your fiance. I’d ask you everyday to marry me if I could.”

“Sap.” She feels him laugh as she leans her head on his chest, drawing circles on his bare skin. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

“I’m always gonna be okay. I have you.”

She kisses his lips before yawning, and he reaches over to shut off the lamp. 

(When Christina goes into work the next morning, Taylor’s waiting for her in her office. With no greeting, they set their laptop down and press play on a video. It’s a compilation of her and Andrei’s little pre-game ritual they had started a few months after they started dating. 

It’s Andrei, usually in his game day suit, and her in the hallway of whatever arena they’re in. He grabs both her hands and kisses her three times. Twice on the lips. Once on her forehead. She always adjusts his collar even if it doesn’t need to be adjusted, and then they’re both off to their separate ways. 

Christina had no idea Taylor had been filming this. For years, apparently, if the description in the bottom right of the video indicates anything. 2024, 2025, 2026 and this year, 2027. 

“I was gonna originally ask you if I could post it the day of your wedding,” Taylor says as the video ends. “But I also would never post it anywhere without you or Svech’s permission. I’m perfectly prepared to just keep this in the archives and never let it see the light of day.”

“You’ve been filming that all these years?”

Taylor smiles softly. “I have. The clip from last night is everywhere, with the broadcast talking about you two while you’re helping him on the ice. Twitter’s going crazy.  And I was thinking, and no pressure at all, but I was thinking that we could post this today. Everyone always loves behind the scenes content, like Marty screaming Svech’s name. I have a feeling everyone’s gonna love this little ritual too.”

The video has been replaying automatically and Christina can’t help but smile. “Okay.”

“For real?”

“Yeah. If you think it’s a good move, I trust you. You’re the social expert.”

“Well, perfect,” they grin. “I’ll catch Svech when he comes in to ask for his permission too.”

Christina snorts. “He’s not gonna say no, I can promise that.” 

He doesn’t. Taylor posts the video three hours later. The internet goes nuts. Andrei surprises her with dinner when she gets home after him, two plates of delicious-looking pasta on the table with a candle lit and a vase of fresh flowers. But the most beautiful sight is his dimpled smile. 

She kisses him. Hard. It feels like the first time again.)

~*~*~

tag list: @ru-kru, @bunbunbl0gs (lmk if you wanna be added!!)

[mademoisellekeery]

\\ Red dress & a black tie //

• Pairing: Co-worker!Steve Harrington x Reader

•Warnings: Swearing, fluff, proof read

•Word count: 1.5k - (1,563 words)

•Summary: Your Co-Worker/Friend, Steve asks you out on a date, after crushing on him for years, and finally “getting over it”, what could go wrong?

•Au/n: THIS IS MY FIRST FIC PEACHES! I’m so excited to post this, let me know if you guys like it and want another part, I do plan on writing part two but feedback would really help!! I did proof read this, multiple times, but if there are any mistakes please let me know! Love love yous, cya in the next one!

You weren't a fool when it came to dating, but you weren't that experienced either. Boys hardly noticed you in High school, and it wasnt any different after. So it surprised you when HE asked you out.

ʚ・ ୨୧・ ɞ ｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ ʚ・ ୨୧・ ɞ

It was the afternoon, and you were 2 hours into your shift at Family Video. Well it wasn't YOUR shift, but Robin had asked you to cover for her since she had a date with Vickie, and after all the late night sleepovers you had with robin where she talked about her crush on vickie, non stop might i add, you couldn’t say no, especially when she spent 3 hours trying to reason with you. It’s not like you had any plans but you were looking forward to the perfect afternoon spent in your sweatpants and hoodie, watching whatever crap is on the television and ordering a pizza but I guess it had to wait.

Maybe the rest of the afternoon wouldn’t be a total bust, Steve was on shift with you and he was always fun to talk to. You were good friends with Steve, well as much as a co-worker can be. There was the odd occasion you’d see each other outside work like running into each other at the grocery store, the mall, or that time robin invited you to watch a movie but little did you know, she also invited steve, which was a little embarrassing since you wore your my little pony pajamas and he wouldn’t let that go for 3 months..

You were practically counting down the seconds till you could leave work, which felt like an ETERNITY! you know what they say, a watched pot never beeps, or was it clock?.. you shook your head discarding your thoughts, maybe you could put your time to use, so you thought you’d go check in on steve. You walked out the manager's office almost tripping over a box of VHS tapes. “Steve!” you called out. This was supposed to be put back hours ago.. you thought to yourself. You called out again when Steve didn’t answer, “Steve! I need you to put the VHS’s back, that was your job.” you huffed as you picked the heavy box up, carrying over to the counter, rifling through it.

As you were sorting through the box, practically doing Steve's job for him, you heard something fall behind you. Whipping your head around, you saw nothing, nothing but a knocked over pile of tapes, did steve just quit his job mid way through? Why is everything out? you decided not to question it too much, picking the fallen tapes off the floor when you heard a noise behind you, before you could turn around someone had their hands on your waist, picking you up and spinning you around, you let out a shriek when the person put you down you turned around, it was steve!

“You asshole! what was that for?” You punched him in the arm, the annoyance in your voice doing a poor job of hiding the fear as steve laughed.

“You should’ve seen your face.” he continued to mock you. You stood there with your arms crossed and a sour look. He cleared his throat, “m’sorry, i thought you could use a little entertainment, i know you love horror movies.” he smirked.

You couldn’t stay mad at him, not when he turned on his signature Harrington charm, it would always ignite a fire under that silly crush of yours.

“Yeah I like watching them, not being in them.” You said, swatting his arms away from you. “And why haven’t you done any work? you know Keith is going to fire your ass." Deciding to switch topics you remembered why you came out here in the first place, and almost tripped over Steve's mess. “I’ll put them away, I just wanted to have a little fun.” he pouted.

“Okay well you and your birds nest of a hair can have fun, over there by the Rom-Com section, putting all these tapes away.” I say giving him a shit-eating grin.

“You know you scream like a girl.” He said, deciding he wasn’t done humiliating you about the situation.

“That’s because i am one Sherlock.” you rolled your eyes, picking up the box from the counter and heading towards the office, when you tripped over something, causing the box to go flying, and you almost falling flat on your face, almost. You looked up and Steve had caught you, his arm wrapped around your waist, holding you tightly. “Shit are you okay?” His voice was laced with concern.

“I’m fine, s’fine. I couldn’t see where I was going.” you looked everywhere but him, feeling too embarrassed to meet his gaze. His strong scent clouding your mind, you forgot you were still in his arms, he was still holding you. You stood up properly, pushing yourself away from steve. “Thank you.” You muttered.

“It’s really no problem.” He felt slightly guilting, seeing what you tripped over, it was some of the VHS tapes he left out. “Your lucky i was there to catch you.” a smile started crawling on his face, oh boy, it started getting to his ego.

“Oh yeah, thanks Prince Charming.” You roll your eyes, but he could see through your harsh demeanour.

“Prince charming? That’s new. Do you happen to like princes?” He smirked.

Flirting wasn’t new between you and Steve, it happened quite a lot actually but you knew the type of person he was, so you just went along with it. You had an odd relationship with Steve, as much as you were “friends”, he always flirted with you and called you pet names like honey, princess, sweetheart and every time when he called you those names you’d get a weird feeling in your stomach, almost butterfly like..

When you first started working at Family Video you couldn’t believe you were working with non other then ‘King Steve’.

“Oh yeah definitely, especially ones with GREAT hair.” You said enthusiastically with a foreign smile.

“So you don’t actually hate my hair then?” He questioned, letting out a laugh.

“Who said I hated it? So what if I still think it looks like a beehive.” You muttered that last part but he still heard it, pretending to be offended by it.

“Ouch princess, that one hurt.” Stumbling backwards and holding his hand over his heart like he was shot, though he quickly let up on his whole act.

“Who knew Prince Charming had an ego that bruised like a peach?” You spat out, you were kind of enjoying this little thing you had going on, it was fun teasing him.

“Looks like even fairy tales have their flaws. Despite my “bruised ego”, how about we turn the page and clock out early?”

“And why would the Prince do that?” You said

Steve raises his eyebrow, leaning more forward, giving a smirk, he is felt a lot more confident. “Oh, well maybe this prince thinks this princess is cute and maybe this prince wants to… I don’t know, take her out or something tonight?”

You stand there, stunned. Your face turns into a tomato. That weird butterfly like feeling coming back..

“You want to take me out? like a date? like a date date? like a date where we sit opposite each other, sharing a milkshake, end of the night kiss, kind of date?” You say rambling, you knew Steve in high school, well you knew of him, I mean who didn’t right? He was THE king of Hawkins High, and every girl (and a few guys) had a crush on him, that included you too, but it was a silly girl crush. (A silly girl crush that was still there.)

The famous King Steve who dated girls like Nancy wheeler or Tammy Thompson, so why the hell was he asking you?

Steve chuckles as his heart races, little did you know this was the day he’d been waiting for awhile now. He had been waiting for the perfect time to ask you out. He’s had a crush on you for months now and he had to do something about it.

“Yes, I want to take you on a date date. Yes to the sitting opposite each other, yes to the milkshake, yes to the kiss, yes to everything.” Steve smirked, as he leaned back on the counter, crossing his arms, he hoped you’d say yes.

He may not have noticed you in high school but he definitely noticed you when you started working here, he couldn’t take his eyes off you. You’d often catch him staring, or you’d get a feeling you were being looked at and as you’d turn your head towards Steve, his head was move away from you, like he was looking.

He felt like such an idiot for not noticing you in high school because you were beautiful, then again, he didn’t want you to know that version of him, the version that would probably sleep with you and never talk to you again. He wanted to treat you right, wanted you to know him now, the better version.

Your heart races in tandem with Steve's admission. The air seems charged with a mix of excitement and anticipation. "Well then," you reply with a playful grin, "I guess I can make time in my schedule for a date date. But, just so we're clear, this isn't some fairy tale, and you're not Prince Charming." You give him a teasing look, secretly thrilled that Steve, the once unattainable figure from high school, is asking you out.

———-

[jennyfromthebes]

okay hi i am back with a concert recap!

-john and matt came onstage carrying glasses of wine. they periodically sipped from and toasted with said glasses of wine. it was delightful and i am obsessed with the vibes there. i did not take any photos but god i hope someone did because it was incredible

-bully (one of the opening acts, who was fantastic) had a picture of her dogs taped to her guitar. i thought that this was excellent. someone in the crowd asked what their names were but i don't remember them

-setlist was EXCELLENT, i'll put the entire thing under a cut. we got two crowd requests in (harlem roulette and you were cool), and jenny iii with just piano was breathtaking. i got incredibly emotional over heretic pride, as is my right as a trans person. dutch orchestra blues was very special to me specifically, on account of jd+matt playing it at my first ever goats concert, and it was really lovely to hear it again! woke up new is also a personal favorite of mine as one of the very first tMG songs i ever loved, so it feels really cool to have heard it live now <3

-i did tape the show! i'm processing it when i have time, already got all my track labels in but there's a bit of audio levelling and etc to do. it'll make it to the archive hopefully within a month or so!

-related to the above, i had my recorder propped up on top of something near the stage, about at eye level with people onstage, and i am very nearly certain that jd saw it because he made a joke about there being a tape of this show. either that or someone was taping with permission but i haven't seen anyone mention that so i am assuming it was me.

-we got a good grade in being an audience :D it was genuinely SUCH a good crowd, you could really feel the way the silences lingered and it was gorgeous. jd commented several times on how much he was enjoying the audience, and honestly huge agree it was incredible.

-before woke up new, jd mentioned the context in which he wrote the song, back when the band was just him and peter, and he said peter sends his regards, at which we all rightfully cheered. this crowd appreciates peter hughes! and then he made a joke about uhhh i think the sports teams in upstate ny and how it's a bad time to be a (team) fan? idk i don't know sports. but i laughed anyway.

-during jenny, people were clapping along, and it did die off mid song, but towards the end of the song jd signalled to the audience to start clapping again! which was unexpected bc i thought he didn't like when people clap along, but it was really fun!

-in a devastating blow to me specifically, they did still have the get lonely sweater at the merch table, but only in a size small, which is not my fucking size come on dude i wanted that one so bad please. tour tshirt and poster are rad and i'm snagging some at the wednesday show for sure, since the venue staff ran us out before i made it back to the merch tables afterwards. they also had sunset tree vinyls!! which, last that i knew that one was out of stock+final run online so i am (eyes emoji) at it.

uhhhhh i think that's it. i'm making decent headway on my tape because i'm working on it instead of doing actual work for my actual job right now. i will probably use my heretic pride patch as the cover art on account of heretic pride moment! also after the show i also went and said hi to the sound guys and they were incredibly nice! it was such a great time and i'm so glad that i braved the weather and the drive to go to it, it was well worth it :D

Setlist:

Hair Match Shirtless In Hamburg Clemency For The Wizard King Dutch Orchestra Blues Woke Up New The House That Dripped Blood Harlem Roulette (audience requested) Song For Lonely Giants Jenny III Southwestern Territory Transcendental Youth The Gray King And The Silver Flame Attunement Going To Kansas Heretic Pride You Were Cool (audience requested) No Children (w/ I Hope You Dance intro) [encore] Jenny You Or Your Memory Palmcorder Yajna This Year

hi!! I'll be at the tmg concert tonight (01/21, Little Rock AR), I'll be the person wearing pink cargo pants and a black jacket with big gold spikes - if you're there too say hi!! :D

[forestkniight]

I'll Be Seeing You

✯ Chapter 1 ✯

Okay, it's been a while since I've written a fic that wasn't a one-shot, so I'm really hoping that it's something I can keep up with. I currently have about four chapters planned, but they are still developing. Even in this chapter, I changed a few things to make the story flow better!

Pairing: Fizzarolli x reader (still debating if I want to make it a polyamorous relationship eventually)

Warning: Swearing

Word Count: 3K

When you’re a kid, the sky's the limit regarding your dreams. No one expects you to have it all figured out, and for the most part, a little voice in your head tells you that you’ll make it out of your situation. Little did you know, it would come at a cost. 

~~

Clutching your chest, you quickly sit up as you try to calm your frantic heartbeat. Several weeks have passed, and you keep having dreams of your past and all the choices that got you where you are today. You take a breath as you look at the slivers of red that pass through the opening of your curtain. 

How long has it been since you fell asleep?

You sigh as you reach for your phone to catch up on anything you might have missed while sleeping, which wasn’t much. Nothing new there. You lay back in bed and stare at the ceiling. These days seem to be going by slower, and you blame it on the lack of sleep due to the dreams. 

Flashes of red and white. 

Of horses.

Of black and white horns.

You shake your head as you check the time. It was still early, and you wouldn’t have to check into work until later on. You currently work as a singer at a live music club in the Pride Ring. You didn’t live an expensive life, but you were content for the most part, especially when you got to sing. When you were a child, all you ever wanted to do was perform in front of people and make them feel something. You never got that opportunity as a child, though. You wince as a memory enters your mind.

“Blitzo! I have to clean that up,” you pouted as you picked up the garbage your friend tossed everywhere on the floor. 

“It’s not my fault you got me a gift and made it impossible to open,” Blitzo says while trying to untape the gift box that was previously in another taped-up gift box. 

You couldn’t help but smile widely as you waited for Blitzo to finally get to the actual gift. You glanced at Fizz, who was just as excited about the gift as your other friend. As if sensing your gaze, he looked up at you and stuck his tongue out at you.

“This is low, even for you! You know Blitzo can’t resist a gift,” Fizz teased.

You giggled as you saw Blitzo’s frustration at opening the gift box and finding yet another gift box inside. 

“Well, I couldn’t make it easy for him,” you said, reaching out to grab the discarded tape Blitzo had thrown to the side. " Besides, his gift is in the next box.”

Fizz smiled and shook his head at you. He looked back at Blitzo's hand, and he was close to opening the final gift box. Once he managed it, he removed its contents.

“No way,” Blitzo’s eyes lit up as he took out a little gold figurine of a horse and a heart-shaped locket.

“I was walking around some shops in my free time and saw it in the window. I knew right away that it was meant for you,” you said as Blitzo launched himself at you, nearly tackling you.

“Thankyouthankyouthankyou,” he said as he hugged you before releasing you to admire his new figurine some more. 

“It’s no problem, Blitzo! You deserve it and more. Now,” you turn and take another gift box from close by, “I couldn’t forget a gift for my second favorite clown!”

Blitzo giggles as Fizz slightly frowns.

“Not funny.”

“Awww, come on Fizz. I’m just joking. You know you’re my favorite,” you giggled as Blitzo’s jaw dropped. 

Fizz instantly beams at the use of the word favorite. 

“Anyways, I saw this in the window, and I-”

“What’s going on here?”

The three of you turn towards the voice belonging to Blitzo’s dad, Cash. 

“Look, Dad! It’s a gold-”

“Shouldn’t you be cleaning the bleachers,” Cash turns to look at you, “They’re not cleaning themselves, girl!”

You felt your face flush in embarrassment at being talked down to in front of your friends, especially when they had acts in the circus. You were just a janitor for all intents and purposes. 

“Sir, I was just taking a little break with my friends,” you said with a tiny voice.

You hated feeling so small—not in a childlike way, but in a way that made you feel like your life was worth less because you were there to clean everybody else’s mess. 

“If you want a break, how about I fire you now, and you get all the breaks you want, huh? And what did I tell you about distracting my star,” Cash snapped at you. 

You felt your eyes tear up as you looked at Blitzo, whose head hung low. You felt bad for him. His own father preferred another boy as his son. You remembered the time his father had sold him for such a low cost and made him steal. That felt like so long ago now.

“I know, sir, but we’re kids too…We just want-”

“I don’t care! Fizzarolli, do you think that big clowns get to where they are because they spend their time talking to the help,” Cash said cruelly.

You turned to look at Fizz. He looked down at the unopened gift box in his hands before setting it slightly off to the side. 

“Fizzy?”

Your voice cracked as you realized he wasn’t going to respond. You looked up at Cash and saw the shit-eating grin he had on his face. You couldn’t help the tears beginning to pool in your eyes.

“I’ll get started right away, sir. I hope you enjoy your gift, Blitzo. Sorry for distracting you from your work, Fizzarolli,” you said bitterly. 

Cash watched as you picked up the last remnants of trash from Blitzo’s gift. You stood up and were getting ready to leave, but not before quickly snatching the letter attached to Fizz’s gift. You could see Fizz’s distress at your action, and you watched him throw a random piece of trash he had been playing with in front of him. Still, you walked forward. You wanted to walk away with some dignity.

“Aren’t you going to pick that up,” Cash barked at you, looking at the scrap in front of Fizz. 

Blitzo and Fizz looked at you as you slowly walked before him and picked up the scrap of trash, a tear running down your face. You couldn’t even bear looking at either of them at this point. You sprinted out of the small tent to head to the main tent and begin your work.

Your heart tugs as you push the memory out of your head. It was bad enough living through it. You don't need to be reminded of it anymore, considering you’ve seen commercials of Blitzø and Fizzarolli as adults. It hurt seeing their faces, especially after the way you left. Still, you wouldn’t allow yourself to dwell on it for longer than a few minutes. There was no point. Thinking about it wouldn’t change what happened. 

~~

After lazing around all day, you finally begin walking to work. You could take a car there, but it was so close, and you enjoy the time it gives you to mentally prepare. While performing was always your dream, it still got you nervous, especially if the crowd in the club was bigger than usual. Some days, the line would stretch outside the club door’s entrance. 

As you walk down the street, looking at the sights, you catch sight of a locket in one of the shop windows. You stop as you instinctively reach up to your locket tucked away under your shirt. You feel a ghost of a smile as you remember the gift you had given Blitzo and Fizzarolli. Your locket had pictures of a young Blitzo and Fizzarolli, Blitzo’s had a picture of you and Fizzarolli, and Fizzarolli’s had a picture of you and Blitzo. You sigh as you wish you could have seen Fizz’s reaction to the locket (and the letter, but that was neither here nor there). 

You see the club fast approaching and notice people already arriving for the night. So much for practicing on stage when you arrive. It must have been one of those nights when they would open the club a bit earlier. 

You quickly step to the side entrance and are let in by one of the bartenders on break. You shoot them a quick smile before finding your way to your dressing room. You always need a moment to take a breath and warm up. You begin humming as you apply minimal makeup. You just required enough so that the spotlight wouldn’t wash you out. You hear faint music in the background as you look at the door of your room through the mirror’s reflection, another memory sneaking back up. 

After cleaning the main tent, you decided to retire to the secret location you went to when you felt sad. You would typically watch your friends perform, but you didn’t want to talk to anyone about what happened earlier. You figured you could stay there until late at night before sneaking back into your tent. 

You finally made it to the location, which consisted of a lot of open space and a giant tree you liked to sit under. You softly threw yourself under the tree as you looked up at the sky, which always seemed to be the same shade of red despite the time. You closed your eyes as you tried to find a way to pass the time. However, your eyes shot open when you heard a tree branch rustling. Before you knew it, something, or more like someone, swung down from the tree branch to sit next to you.

“Heya,” Blitzo said, throwing his hands out and laying beside you. 

You rolled your eyes at how he seemed to have forgotten what had transpired earlier. 

“Blitzo, I told you to stop coming here! This is my secret place,” you whined. 

Blitzo turned to look at you, and it was his turn to roll his eyes.

“It’s not exactly a secret if people can easily walk to it from the circus.”

“Still…” 

You wanted to be alone, but Blitzo always had a way of showing up when that was the case. Some part of you was glad. Even though you wanted to be alone, it didn’t mean that was what you needed, and being around Blitzo always made you feel better. You were content to stay silent, but that wasn’t what Blitzo had in mind.

“Oh! Fizz wants to see you after the show. He wants to talk to you and get the complete gift,” Blitzo said as he sat up, looking down at you.

You quirked your eyebrow as you sat up as well. The complete gift? He must be on about the letter. 

“I wouldn’t want to distract Fizzarolli from all the important stuff he has to do,” your words are filled with sarcasm. 

“He’s coming here whether you like it or not. My dad can’t be the reason your friendship goes down the drain,” he plays with his hands, “he can’t ruin anything else.”

You feel your attitude drop at that last part. You make eye contact with him and nod to confirm that you will give Fizz the complete gift. He smiles slightly, and your eyes catch the locket around his neck. You feel a smile start to spread. He follows your gaze and rolls your eyes.

“Yea, yea. It’s not a big deal,” he stands. " Anyway, I've got to get ready for the show, but I’ll see you after, okay?”

“Alright,” you respond hesitantly as you watch him start the walk back to the main circus tent. Eventually, he walks into the tent, leaving you alone again.

You reach down to your pocket where you had folded up the letter you would give to Fizz. You had spent so much time ensuring everything was perfect, only for the moment to be ruined. You sigh and throw yourself back again, allowing the tears to reappear. This was a safe place to do so. 

The wind was blowing slightly, and you couldn’t help but reflect on your life at the circus. You had joined after you were left alone due to…circumstances. Luckily for you, Fizz and Blitzo found you on the street and asked if you were alright. If only little you could see where you were now. Would you have taken their outstretched hands? 

You didn’t know how much time had passed, but you did know it wasn’t long until people started flooding out of the tents. You felt your stomach do flips. Were you ready to tell Fizz what the letter said, especially after his silence today? Your love for him was unconditional. You only ever saw Fizz, your best friend, not Fizzarolli, the performer. You cared so deeply for him and Blitzo. They saved you and made a home in your heart that would never disappear, but you were dreaming if you thought they would ever forget your place at the circus. 

But what did that mean for you? Would you be willing to stay in a place that would lead to you yearning for something that would never happen? Were you willing to stand by and watch your friends move on in life without you? Fall in love without you? Watch Fizz fall in love with someone? 

You sat up as tears began flowing faster down your face. Your heart was in your throat as years of self-hate and pain started pouring out. Your sobs become audible. 

No, you wouldn’t become the pathetic friend who fell in love with someone they couldn’t have, the pathetic friend who thought that what they did didn’t matter as much as who they were. 

You looked up at the circus, a decision being made in your mind. You stood up and quickly ran back to your tent. You tried to listen to the performance and realized it was two acts from the end. You quickly grabbed your backpack and packed only the most valuable things you owned. The rest could be replaced, but things like gifts from your friends, items from your past before the circus, and even a hoodie from the circus were something you couldn’t part with. 

The final act was beginning—Blitzo and Fizz’s duo act. Your heart pounded as you thought about what you were doing. It wouldn’t hurt to try to see just the beginning, so you left your backpack hidden by the circus’ entrance. You snuck into the main tent and climbed to a location where only Blitzo and Fizz could see you. They still hadn’t dropped down, and you saw them messing around from across the space. Blitzo saw you first, and he beamed at you as he waved. You couldn’t help the smile that automatically appeared as you waved back. Fizz turned to see what he was waving at and saw you. He gave you a soft smile with a hesitant wave, and you felt your smile falter. 

Your first love. That’s what it was. Boy, was it frightening. But you wouldn’t fuck up his life. You knew he would make it far without you. You gave him a sad smile and noticed both of their concerned expressions. 

‘Why?’ You see Blitzo mouth, and your eyebrows raise. He mimes tears, and you reach up and feel them. 

You quickly wiped them away and chuckled to yourself. You’re terrible at leaving, but you had to, and their entrance was fast approaching.

‘It’s fine, I’m okay,’ you mouth back with gestures to match. 

They look at each other before turning to look at you worriedly. They can’t do anything, though.  They won’t. They have their jobs to do. You watched Fizz grab the rope nearby that he would swing down on, but not before turning to look at you again.

‘See you after,’ he mouths before raising his voice to ask Blitzo if he is ready. You begin making your descent, and you walk out of the tent. You quickly grab your backpack and take off at full speed towards the tree. 

FIzz was the one who showed you this tree. You liked pretending it was a secret space just for you, but it was all of yours. You stared up at it, and you felt the tears come back. You were okay, though. This was for the best. You pull out the letter you wrote to Fizz and place it at the tree's base. You didn’t bother weighing it down. If it flew away, it’d probably be a sign. Part of you hoped it would blow away, just like you. You turn towards the main tent and notice the early leavers are already spilling out. 

“There’s the rest of the gift, Fizzy. I hope you enjoy it as much as I've enjoyed getting to know you—the both of you. You saved my life in more ways than you know. I know you’ll do great things,” you whisper as you turn to leave. You hear the sound of people getting louder, and you run—for the second time in your life. 

Your eyes focus on your figure in the mirror, and your mascara was running a bit. 

“Damn it,” you move to get tissue papers, “I need to stop thinking back. We’re all better off now.”

You look unconvinced in the mirror and try on a smile to trick your body into believing it is okay. 

“It’s fine, you’re okay,” you whisper. 

You hear a knock on your door, followed by the stage manager’s minute warning. You take a deep breath and look at yourself in the mirror again. 

You looked like a proper singer. You smile gently and head out to the club's backstage area. The curtains are closed, and you can hear the hum of music and people having fun. You hear the emcee announcing your act next, and you can’t help but think about how far you have come. 

You did it. You made it out.

The curtains open, and the spotlight lands on you.

I hope you all enjoyed this first chapter! I'm really pumped to get the rest of these chapters written and published. I don't have a set timeline since I'm currently in college, working a job, and performing in a theater production, but I will try to work on this whenever I can!

Also, just a little spoiler: in the next chapter, we will see someone from our main narrator's past (outside of flashbacks)!

Edit: The original name of this fic was "Dream a Little Dream of Me," but I have decided to change it to "I'll Be Seeing You" since this song fits the story a bit more!

[naughtyneganjdm]

Naughty or Nice - Chapter 6

Summary: Beau bonds with Y/N over their similarities and it draws Negan closer to her with how good she is with his son.

Characters: Negan, the reader (OC), Beau, Erin, Maggie, Hershel, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51464518/chapters/132277492

Warnings: Swearing, dirty talk, angst, etc.

Notes: This was a really long chapter that I broke into two and added a lot to it. So it took me a while to post this. Sorry about that. The next one should be up soon since it's already done. Thank you for reading the story. I appreciate it!

“I don’t understand,” Beau spoke up following Y/N toward the barn that he had found her at earlier with his father. After they had breakfast, his family sat together with hers at the table to plan out the next few days. Y/N took charge of the conversation and with Maggie’s back up, they planned out a lot of the things that Beau asked of Y/N when she wanted to know what he wanted to do before Christmas. Surprisingly, Hershel and the rest of the family were easy to persuade in agreeing to the plans they made. Especially after Y/N stressed that it was something Beau wanted to do.

Once they were done, Y/N had informed them that she wanted to make plans to do something with Beau a few hours after their conversation, she just had to run to the store to do a few chores first. Even though it was vague, Beau was interested in whatever she had planned so he agreed to it. With Glenn and Y/N leaving, it left a few hours between where they would be alone at the farm. Maggie took the opportunity of taking them up to the attic to go through some of her family’s old photo booklets.  So Negan, Beau, Erin and Maggie all sat together on Negan’s bed looking at the photos and listening to the stories that Maggie told. Halfway through it was pretty obvious they had gotten bored, but they were trying really hard to be nice and listen to Maggie. It was something she was excited about sharing with them, so they were giving her their full attention. Toward the end of it, Erin had fallen asleep on Negan and Beau wished he could have been able to do the same thing without looking rude. While he liked Maggie, it was hard going through a long period of time just looking at old photos.

When Erin did wake up, she asked if Maggie would be willing to take them out riding on the horses again and Maggie agreed. They tried to get Beau to go with them, but he was excited to just have some alone time after everything. Negan offered to wait for Y/N with him, but Beau assured his father he was fine. Part of him thought Negan wanted to wait it out himself, but grudgingly went along with it. Riding horses wasn’t something Beau was really interested in. He cared more so about whatever Y/N had planned for him.

When Y/N finally did show back up, she brought a pair of Shawn’s old clothes for Beau to change into. It confused him, but he didn’t question it. Now that they were walking back to the barn he had found Y/N in earlier with his dad, he didn’t know how to respond to it, “What’s with the clothes? We both look like we’re from a nineties music video.”

“You know what a nineties music video looked like?” Y/N looked back over her shoulder at Beau, amused to hear that come from him since he was so young.

“My mother showed me a lot of the things that she liked when she was younger. So yeah, I have a tape player and everything. I know my music history,” Beau noted with a shrug of his shoulders, brushing his hair back over his ear. “So what is this?”

“Patience my boy,” Y/N held her finger up, pulling open the doors of the barn and stepping aside. Allowing him to see what she had set up, Beau tipped his head to the side with his eyebrows furrowed. His dimples sank in and his hazel eyes looked to her. “Get inside before you freeze.”

“Yes ma’am,” Beau moved into the barn and it made her laugh considering she knew that Negan often responded the exact same way to her.

“I give you and your father one thing, you both have manners,” she closed the doors behind them and moved around to turn the heater on that she had set up for them. One thing she learned earlier with Negan was that if they were going to spend a significant amount of time in that barn, they were going to need some heat.

“I do my best,” Beau folded his arms out in front of his chest, eyeballing what Y/N had set up. There was a bunch of plastic tarp spread out on the ground inside of the barn and off to the sides were two large canvases resting on easels. “If the canvases weren’t here, I might think you were trying to kill me.”

“God,” she choked at his comment, realizing it probably did look like it could be that way. “I could actually see where you came up with that. I am so sorry.”

“I’m teasing you,” Beau explained with a shake of his head, stepping on the tarp hearing the sound it made beneath his feet. “If it was just the tarp, I would worry. With the two canvases set up, obviously you aren’t trying to kill me. I mean, unless you’re going to use my blood to make some kind of art piece.”

“Beau!” she couldn’t help but laugh at his thoughts when he tossed his hands up in the air, giving her an innocent expression. “You’re silly.”

“I try,” he snickered, taking a look around the barn. A long sigh fell from his lips and he rubbed his hands together in attempts to warm up since the heater hadn’t completely started working yet. “All jokes aside. What’s up with this?”

“I know this might be lame, but when I was younger, I was really into art and my emotions. I think Annette was doing her best to try to help me feel better so she would buy me all these paints and canvases,” she related to Beau who was watching her intently with his bright hazel eyes. “So whenever I was feeling depressed or stressed, I would just come out here and paint. I would try many different forms of getting the paint on the canvas. I wanted to find what felt right for me. I think most of my time was spent in here with me finding myself.”

Waving her hand out, she motioned Beau to follow her toward all of the different types of paints that she had gotten along with different brushes and items that he could use to get the paint on the canvas. Holding her hands up in the air, she sighed loudly and cleared her throat, “I see a lot of a younger me in you. So I thought maybe you would like to do something like this.”

“You’re really cool,” Beau spoke faintly and he could tell it made her happy to hear that with the way a smirk tugged at her lips. “I mean it. When I’m feeling bad, I often grab my sketchbook and just draw or write things down. I wish I would have had an art room like this where I could have gone crazy.”

“I’m sure if you asked your dad, he would do that for you,” Y/N suggested getting Beau to contemplate it, his eyebrows bouncing up when he stroked his hand over the side of his face. “Try this first. See how you like it. If you like it, maybe your dad will do something like this for you.”

“Alright,” Beau took time to consider what she was saying, gazing at all the supplies that she had set out for them. “What do you want to paint?”

“What is it that is weighing heavy on you? What do you want to paint?” she inquired, almost knowing what he was going to say, but she wanted him to be the one to make up his mind. “I want you to paint what your heart is feeling.”

“My mom. It’s always my mom,” Beau was honest with her, his hazel eyes filling with a sense of sadness. Reaching out, she caressed her hand in over his shoulder to show her support before stepping back. Even though she was connecting with Negan’s son, she didn’t want to make it too weird for him. Maybe she was worrying too much, but it was what it was. “Is that something you would really be comfortable with painting though? Your mom? I don’t want us to have a theme that is going to upset you.”

“It couldn’t hurt to try,” Y/N spoke with a shrug of her shoulders. The thing that was on her mind the most right now? Negan. But it would be strange for her to paint Beau’s father, so if his theme was his mother, she would find it in herself to paint something that she was feeling toward her own mother.

“Do you want to pick the music?” she held her phone up in the air for him after she connected it to some speakers that she had set out.

“Let’s just go with whatever you like,” Beau offered and she gave a small nod, picking one of her playlists from her phone. Setting it down on the table she had set up, she looked to Beau and saw him eyeing over the paints. “How messy can we get this?”

“I bought a lot of stuff, so as messy as you want to get this. Use as much as you want. Go crazy with it,” she replied back seeing Beau reach for a vibrant color of paint that she had picked up. Getting it open, Beau looked up at her with amusement in his features before heading over toward one of the canvases. They were facing away from each other so that way the final project could be hidden until the end. With a grunt, Beau threw the paint at the canvas making Y/N laugh out at the sound it made. The paint splattered and dripped down from the canvas. Beau’s laugh filled the air when he shrugged his shoulders.

“I thought this might be the quickest way of getting the background a certain color,” Beau explained to her, already getting splattered in paint with his clothes so she figured it was a good plan when she gave him some clothes he could easily toss away. “Are you open to talking while you work?”

“Sure,” she grabbed her supplies to get started on her painting. “I’m always willing to talk.”

“What would you have done if I would have told you that I didn’t want to do this?” Beau’s nose wrinkled, making it obvious with his expression that he was just teasing her further, but she ran with it.

“I would have tucked my tail between my legs and grabbed Glenn. Forced him to do something,” she had an answer for him, but she was hopeful that he would agree to this. “I’m glad you don’t think it’s completely lame.”

“Not at all,” Beau shook his head, sucking at his bottom lip while he spread out the paint he used to get it across the canvas. “I think you’re a very interesting person. From what little I know about you that is. You know how to set up a murder scene after all.”

“Painting…murdering someone, same thing,” she snickered noticing the way that Beau smiled at her. “I think painting can get messier sometimes. Especially when you feel passionate about the piece.”

“Or if you’re just being lazy and you want to get something done fast,” Beau suggested, stepping away from the canvas to look down over himself. Amusement flooded his young features knowing that he had gotten himself incredibly messy from what he had already done. “It’s not fun if you don’t get messy.”

“That’s probably what we are missing at work,” Y/N noted, a small laugh falling from her throat. “Everyone is so uptight there. If we got messy sometimes, I think people would have a lot more fun.”

“Then make it happen,” Beau thought aloud, “You’re in charge. Shake things up a little bit.”

“I don’t think the big boss would be okay with something like that. You probably see the way your dad has to dress every day,” she contemplated the idea knowing that she hated dressing up like that every day as well. “I think with art you should be more relaxed. Wear business clothes when someone is coming in or you have a meeting. People work so much better when they are more comfortable. Dress for success is what they say, but I think people would work better if they wore whatever they wanted.”

“They’ve liked your ideas so far,” Beau pointed out wondering if it was something she would actually try to do. It was something he heard his father complain about every morning since he could remember. Negan was not a suit wearing guy. He hated it. So Beau knew it would be something that his dad would appreciate. “Permission to change the subject to something a little more personal?”

“You don’t have to keep asking permission for things,” she replied back, finding amusement in Negan’s son’s manners while she contemplated her art piece. “You can talk to me about anything that you want to talk about.”  

“I just don’t want to hurt or upset you,” Beau confessed, taking a moment to think things over. “Why do you let your father talk to you the way he does?” Beau wondered knowing that it was probably something that he shouldn’t have brought up, but it was weighing heavy on his mind. “The way he talks to you is very demeaning. I’m sorry for bringing it up, but I don’t like it. I mean, he’s been nice to me but Mr. Greene could learn a few things about being a father.”

“You’re not upsetting me by saying it. You’re not wrong,” she pointed out from where she was over by her canvas set up. It was sad that even Negan’s child was capable of seeing the way that Hershel treated her was wrong, but her own father couldn’t see it himself. “I give him backtalk sometimes, but at the same time, I don’t know? Maybe I keep my mouth shut sometimes because I just know he’s my father.”

“And because of that is why he shouldn’t be like that,” Beau reasoned with her, his raspy voice hitching when he headed over to the supplies to look for a few things that he wanted. “I wouldn’t fight with my dad, but my dad doesn’t treat me the way that Mr. Greene treats you.”

“That’s because your father is an incredible man,” she replied back noticing the way that Beau looked back at her with a smirk before nodding. “You were lucky that you ended up with such a good dad. You can tell that he loves you and Erin very much.”

“I know this is deep, but you should be proud of yourself,” Beau suggested while working on his painting. “I was lucky enough to grow up with two incredible parents. I had my mom. I had my dad. And they both loved me. They raised me right. I’ve been surrounded by nothing but love my entire life. I lost my mom and it broke me, but I never questioned if she loved me. I can see your family was hard on you and you never knew your mom. For someone who grew up in the position that you did, you really turned out good. You’re successful, you’re nice…”

“I don’t know how nice I am kiddo,” she sighed loudly, stealing a quick look at Beau who was watching her from where he was standing by his painting. “I’ve probably done some really questionable things that people wouldn’t find very nice.”

“You’ve been nothing but nice to me,” Beau reminded her and it made a lump develop in her throat. “You’ve gone above and beyond to make me feel comfortable. Even when you barely knew me. If that’s not kindness. I don’t know what is,” Beau continued on thinking things over, “And someone could say it’s because you know my dad, but it’s not. I can’t tell you how many people know my dad and they don’t go above and beyond for me like you have in the last two days. Maggie included.”

“I just want you happy,” she informed him feeling the lump in her throat growing bigger. “You remind me of me when I was younger and I…I don’t know.”

“It’s because you’re a good person,” Beau reiterated with a firmness to his tone causing her to shrug her shoulders. “One day, you’re gonna see it. Even if your family makes you feel otherwise. Your family should lift you up. Not bring you down. Maybe my family can show you that.”

“You’re sweet,” she commented and it made Beau smile, his dimples becoming more visible while he continued to work on his painting. “You know, I got Maggie to agree to doing all of the things that you wanted to do for Christmas. We figured out our schedule over the next few days.”

“See what I mean about the whole you being a kind person thing?” Beau stuck to what he was saying previously and it made her smile, shaking her head since he was sticking with it. “Thank you for doing that. You didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to,” she corrected him knowing that she didn’t want to make him think that it was for any reason other than what it was for. “I don’t want you to feel like I did when I was younger. You shouldn’t feel broken or sad. I think your mother would want the best for you.”

“She was awesome you know,” Beau informed Y/N thinking back on his mother. “I think she would have really liked you. You remind me of her. When I saw you in my dad’s room the other day, it brought back so many memories of her for me. And the way you are with people? I wish you could have met her. The two of you would have been good friends.”

“I’m sure I would have really liked her,” she commented, a smirk tugging at her lips when she heard Beau singing along to the music that was on in the background. For a while they were quiet while they worked on things, but the best part of doing this whole thing was seeing how emotional it seemed to make Beau in a good way. Whenever she would steal a look at him, he would either be contemplating deeply or smiling and that made her happy to see. “How’s it going?”

“Not too bad,” Beau responded, stepping away from the painting that he was working on and it showed her that the clothes he was wearing were covered in paint along with his hands and arms. It made her laugh and he looked down at himself. Shamelessly, he shook his arms to try to get some of it off, but it just spread more. “Hey Y/N? What was your favorite thing about Christmas growing up? Do you have a favorite memory?”

“Uh…” she paused to think about it and the longer she did, the more she began to realize that she didn’t really have a good memory to think of. “I don’t think so. Sadly. My family always went all out on Christmas, but there is no exact memory that I have that’s very…happy.”

“That makes me sad,” Beau frowned, shaking his head at the thought of not having a moment or moments to really stand out for her. “We’ll have to change that for you. Because everyone deserves to have memories that they can look back on and be happy about.”

“We’ll see,” she breathed out knowing that this time that she had been able to spend with Negan and Beau were some of her favorite moments that she had in a very long time. That scared her because she didn’t have a lot of good moments to look back on in her life. If she was starting to admit that she was happy, she was afraid that these feelings and moments that she was having would be taken away from her. Looking forward to things or getting ahead of herself was not something she should be doing because this was so new and she didn’t want to get excited for something that would only lead to sadness in the end.

“So…” Beau spoke up from the other end of the barn. “You and Glenn. When are the two of you planning on getting married?”

“Uh, we never picked a date,” Y/N felt her heartbeat quicken at the name of her fiancé that had joined her on this trip.

“Why is that?” Beau wondered and honestly? It was a question she never really thought about herself.

“I don’t know,” she was honest with Negan’s son. “He asked me to marry him and after that? We really didn’t talk about it much more. I’ve been so busy with my new job and everything that I never actually thought about getting married.”

“I see,” Beau sighed, his lips parting like he wanted to say something, but he rethought it and changed the direction of his questions. “Was it romantic when he asked you to marry him?”

“I mean…” she didn’t know whether to be honest or not with Negan’s son. Thinking things over, what could it hurt with her being honest with Beau? “No. It wasn’t. Glenn asked me in front of a bunch of people and we had never really talked about marriage before. I guess when I pictured me getting engaged to someone, I figured it would be personal. Something that I could look back on that was special between me and the person I was in love with. When Glenn asked me, I was almost afraid of telling him no because I didn’t want to hurt him. He’s so sweet and he’s a good person. The last thing I wanted to do was upset him.”

“So you don’t want to be engaged to him,” Beau clarified making a lump develop in her throat and she lowered down the brush that she was using to paint the art that she was doing. “Why tell him yes then?”

“Because I didn’t want to hurt him,” she confessed back, looking to the ring that was on her finger. “I cared more about his feelings than I did what I really wanted.”

“That’s not what love should be like,” Beau asserted and she found herself impressed to hear this coming from a thirteen-year-old. “I think Glenn is nice and everything, but I don’t see that spark between the two of you.”

“The spark?” she set down what she was painting with, reaching up to drag her hand across the painting that she was doing and it made Beau give her an odd expression. “It will make sense when you see the painting.”

“Okay?” Beau was confused but went with it. “Yeah. The spark. I saw it with my dad and my mom when she was alive. There is this thing that people have when they look at each other. You can just see it. You and Glenn come off like best friends. I hope that doesn’t offend you.”

“I’m not offended,” she reassured Beau, moving over to the paints that she had set up. Beau moved in beside her looking for something while she cleaned up a few things. Taking a look at Beau, she couldn’t help but laugh seeing him covered in the paint. “Did you get any paint on the canvas?”

“I did. Thank you,” Beau snorted reaching his fingers out to dip them in some of the paint before flicking it at her, watching her turn away from the spray of the paint. With a small laugh, Beau tried to bite back on it before Y/N turned to him. Nodding, she reached out to dip her fingers in the same paint before flicking it at Beau. With a laugh, Beau shrugged his shoulders and pointed to what he was wearing. “Like that is really going to affect me. I’m already covered Y/N.”

“Okay, well in that case,” she reached for the pink paint that she had set out and Beau let out a nervous laugh.

“Now hold on. You wouldn’t do that,” Beau held his hand up to stop her from doing it. “You wouldn’t want to get that all over with the toxins that could be in the paint and…”

“I got the safe, nontoxic paint for us,” she informed him and Beau let out a nervous sound. A moment later she tossed the paint out watching it hit Beau with a splash when the rest of the paint hit the ground where the tarp was beneath him. “I think pink is your color, Beau.”

“Wow,” Beau held his hands up in the air, his head shaking when he looked down at himself. Moving over toward the paints, Beau grabbed one of the open containers and he watched her backstepping away from him. “Now wait a second, I just want to show you this…”

“Beau,” she tried dodging him moving around the barn. Holding her hands up, she shook her head. “I mean it was only justice since you have all that paint over you already.”

Watching Negan’s son, she ducked when he threw the paint at her and heard the door opening at the same time. With a splashing sound, she heard a grunt follow. Beau’s laughter filled the air and she looked back over her shoulder to see that Negan was standing at the door with red paint dripping down his face and the front of his body.

“Negan,” Y/N choked back at on laughter as he reached up in attempts to wipe the paint from his face, but it didn’t do much. “You…you know. Red is really your color. You look great.”

“Hey, Y/N?” Beau called out drawing her to look back over her shoulder and before she could react, paint was being thrown on her. Gasping out, she looked down at herself to see that she was covered in green paint and Beau was giggling. “Now the two of you are very festive.”

“I’m not going to have any clothes by the time this whole trip is done,” Negan moved into the barn, looking down at the paints that were still left. Grabbing one, Negan turned toward his son watching Beau take off running and he followed his son around the barn.

As they rounded the corner, Negan slipped on the tarp and the paint that he was carrying poured all over him. Groaning out, Negan heard the laughs of both Y/N and Beau, but instead of letting it keep him down, he was chasing both of them throughout the barn. It was probably dangerous in some sense, but they were all laughing and having fun with one another. It was the first time in a long time that he had heard this kind of laughter from Beau and he loved it.

“Shit,” Negan felt the paint beneath him making him slip and Y/N reached out to catch him, both of them cackling over the fact that they were both covered in paint and looked like a mess. “I’m going to be in so much trouble.”

“You sure are,” Beau called out from where he was standing with the last bit of paint. Scrambling to get up, Negan felt his feet slipping again and just when he was about to try to move, he ended up bringing Y/N down with him.

“Negan, I think we’re…” Maggie’s voice spoke up when the door pulled open again and she was met with the splash of the paint that Beau had thrown at both Y/N and Negan. Once the paint hit Maggie, Beau immediately dropped the can and scrambled backwards, but he slipped on the tarp and fell on his bottom. A gasp fell from Maggie’s lips when she shakily reached up to try to wipe the white paint that was over her face off. Once she got a look at the barn and the mess that they had made along with how all three of them were covered in paint, it made her huff. Beau was motionless, knowing that it was his fault that Maggie got covered in the paint that she did. “I don’t even want to know, but I’m going to go get cleaned up and changed. Please clean…whatever the hell this is up.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan breathed out, slowly pulling himself up from the ground to stand face to face with Maggie. There was no doubt that she was furious with this whole thing and he was doing everything he could to keep his amusement hidden, but he was failing. Tiny laughs were escaping his throat, but he was trying to hide them between fake coughs. “We’ll get right to it.”

“I am so sorry,” Beau muttered from where he was seated on the ground. Attempting to pull himself up, Beau could see that Maggie’s expression softened when he spoke to her. It was a vastly different look than that of what she was giving Negan. “We were just playing around and they fell. I swear, I would have never thrown paint on you.”

“Don’t worry about it kiddo,” Maggie forgave him, holding her hands up only to hear the sound of someone moving in behind her.

“Holy shit,” a young voice stammered making Y/N choke when she saw Erin standing beside Maggie staring out at the mess that was made. There was shock and awe in the mess that Erin saw, but it was mostly amusement. Which was quite funny considering Erin was so young. “What the heck happened?”

“There was a…uh…” Negan looked around, throwing his hands up when he spoke. It was hard coming up with a lie good enough to fit whatever had happened between them here. “There was an explosion.”

“I’m glad I wasn’t here when it went off,” Erin looked up to see that Maggie was covered in the paint too which immediately made her start giggling. White droplets were dripping from Maggie’s face and onto the tarp. Looking to the other three, she couldn’t contain her laughter, placing her hand in over her stomach. Tears were forming at her eyes seeing how ridiculous that they all looked. “You all look silly. It’s so funny!”

“You want a hug?” Negan offered up to his daughter hearing her giggle. Shaking her head, she hid behind Maggie, her little cheeks turning a bright shade of red from her laughter. At least Erin was having fun with all of this. “Come on. I’ll give you a big hug? I know your daddy’s hugs are your favorite.”

“No daddy. I don’t need to become a real-life painting,” Erin denied him the hug that he was requesting from her before backstepping away from them.

“I’ll have my dad and stepmom watch over her while I’m taking a shower,” Maggie urged Erin toward the door of the barn. “At some point, you can let me know what happened here.”

“It was an art project between Beau and I,” Y/N responded, holding her finger up to point to the canvases that were still standing. “It got…messy.”

“I can tell,” Maggie opened the door, holding it open and circling her finger around her face. “So can my face.”

“We were just having some fun Maggie. It was mostly my fault,” Beau spoke up, hating that Y/N was taking the majority of the credit for this whole thing. “I got carried away and I was having some fun with things. I started the paint throwing.”

“I’m not mad. I’m just going to need to take my second shower of the day and I’m pretty sure all of you are going to too,” Maggie slurred, trying to wipe some of the paint from her face again, letting out a grunt. There was an anger that was flooding her veins, but thankfully she was holding it back likely because of Erin and Beau. “I’ll go take that shower now.”

“Be careful,” Negan called out, making Maggie stop in the doorway and Erin looked back at Maggie confused. Snickering to himself, Negan was aware that his comment likely fired Maggie up, but that was how he always was with Maggie. So it wasn’t like he was acting any different. They always fucked with one another and he liked getting on her nerves. Waving to Erin, Negan shook his head and paint splattered from his dark hair. With a huff, Y/N pushed into his shoulder and he snickered. “Love you baby.”

“Love you too daddy,” Erin called out before Maggie closed up the doors leaving them all alone in the barn together.

Wrapping his arm around Y/N’s shoulders, Negan shook his head and let out a long exhale, “I am in so much trouble later.”

“I’m sure it will be me that takes the grunt of it,” Y/N suggested with a frown knowing that while Maggie was trying to be polite about things, it would be her fault somehow that this happened. That’s how it always was growing up. Even if it was something that made her happy, if it upset Maggie? She was always going to be at fault.

“I’m sorry,” Beau apologized, finally gathering himself completely and standing up straight. “I didn’t know she was coming in. And if I did, I would have never thrown that paint. I know what a tight ass she can be.”

“Beau!” Negan tried to correct his son, but his laughter kind of hid through how he was really feeling.

“You know I’m right,” Beau waved his hand about and moved around the barn toward the canvas that was Y/N’s. When he saw it, his eyes grew wide and he let out a tense breath. “Wow.”

“What’s this?” Negan moved around the canvas to take a look at it and he let out a surprised breath when he saw her painting. It was a portrait of a woman, but her face had been smudged not allowing any real details to show a face. Her identity was a blur and it drew a chill down Negan’s spine.

“The topic was our mothers,” Beau educated his father on what their theme was while Negan eyed over the details of the painting. Moving in beside Negan, she felt Negan’s fingers hooking with hers while they all stood before her art. They probably all looked ridiculous right now covered in paint while observing her work, but she didn’t mind it. Holding Negan’s hand like this might have been dangerous territory, but it came so natural for them. “I kind of want to cry. Especially knowing that you never knew what your mother looked like. It really hits home.”

“It’s beautiful Y/N,” Negan stammered, his chest rising and falling while they all stood together. “You should keep this because it’s amazing. I feel like I was just punched in the fucking gut. It’s so emotional with the way you decided to do this.”

It was something that just came naturally to her while she was doing it. At the time, she hadn’t thought much about it, but now that everyone was observing her art and she was taking the time to think about how she felt about her mother, it was drawing her eyes to burn at the thought. Trying to shake it off, she didn’t want to get emotional in front of the boys so she attempted to take the attention off her.

“What about yours Beau?” Y/N moved over toward Beau’s, with Negan’s hand still in hers when they all made their way over.

“Well, I didn’t get to really put the finishing details on it,” Beau declared, following them not far behind when they headed over to the painting that he was working on. “But it’s mostly done.”

Negan’s breath caught in his throat when he saw that Beau did a close up painting of Lucille’s face in bright, vibrant colors. There was no hiding that it was Lucille and he couldn’t believe how talented his son was, “Jesus Beau. You are so fucking talented.”

“Eh, I still need to learn a lot,” Beau suggested eyeing over Y/N and Negan while they stood before his painting of his mother. Noticing that they were holding hands, Beau smirked and looked back to the painting. “It’s nowhere near as thought provoking as Y/N’s painting.”

“Yeah, but Beau…you are thirteen years old and this is stunning,” Y/N waved her hand about in the air pointing toward the painting that Beau had visibly worked so hard on. “This is amazing.”

“This is from memory?” Negan looked to his son and Beau nodded. “Beau, I don’t even know if I could do it this well.”

“I look at her photo everyday dad,” Beau reminded Negan, his shoulders shrugging when he stepped forward to eye over the art he made of his mother. “I don’t want to forget her face. It’s the most important thing to me right now. And the vibrant colors remind me of her. You remember how mom was. She was always so in your face. Nothing was ever muted when it came to mom.”

Letting out a tremoring breath, Beau felt Negan’s hand grasping a firm hold of his. Looking down, he squeezed his fingers around Negan’s tighter feeling the lump growing bigger in his throat. For a while they just stood in silence and Beau couldn’t help but notice that they were all linked together in this moment. Hand in hand. Resting his head against Negan’s shoulder, Beau allowed them time to finish looking at his work before they carefully moved the canvases to the back so they wouldn’t get ruined with their clean up.

“Knock-knock,” a voice called out while they were finishing everything up to the best of their ability. An overwhelmed grumble fell from the throat of Hershel when he got a looked at all three of them. “What in God’s name were you all doing in here? Maggie told me you would need towels, but this is…”

“Just having some fun Mr. Greene,” Beau interrupted Y/N’s father, rocking back and forth on his feet when he brought Hershel’s attention onto him. “But don’t worry, we cleaned it up and it won’t be a problem.”

“It will be if you walk into the house like that,” Hershel threw his hand up in the air pointing to the three of them and the way they were covered in the paint. “I brought the towels so you can change out of your clothes and wrap yourself in these on your way back to the house. We’ll spray down the clothes and your shoes so they can dry out.”

“Thank you, sir,” Beau stepped forward, accepting the towel from Hershel. Negan did the same and the glare that Hershel gave Negan made him let out a nervous breath.

“What do you want us to change out of?” Negan’s eyebrow arched, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat when he thought about the situation. “It’s gonna be a little weird walking back to the home in nothing but a towel.”

“Keep your undergarments on, obviously,” Hershel rolled his eyes and it made Beau snicker at his response to everything. And keep your socks on too. You’re going to be walking through snow. It’s the best we can do. Just go in the back and change away from everyone else.”

“You can go first kiddo,” Y/N instructed to Beau who gave her a firm nod leaving both Negan and Y/N to suffer from the glare of her father while they waited. Hershel’s eyes fell upon the paintings that were in the back and he tipped his head to the side. “The project was our mothers.”

“I see,” Hershel scoffed, pushing his hands into his pockets. “I reckon the vibrant one is your late wife Negan?”

“Yeah. That’s Lucille,” Negan responded, noticing that Hershel was looking over the paintings, his eyes squinting as if trying to get a better look. “My boy really nailed a lot of her features. I can show you a picture later to see how talented he is.”

“I can see from here that your son is talented. I don’t need a photograph to prove it,” Hershel huffed, his eyes gazing over at Y/N who seemed to be standing there in silence. “What is it with you and your art? You can’t just do art in peace. You have to always make a big event of it? You all are going to have to walk back in the cold because of this. Who knows what the boy is going to get. Maggie got paint on the porch from what you threw on her.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” she breathed out, her throat tensing up knowing that she was going to get a lecture from her father. She called that one from the start. “We were just having some fun. Beau is an artist and this was my favorite thing to do as a kid.”

“Her painting is incredible though, right?” Negan spoke up, trying to break Hershel’s attention away from being irritated with her over something that was just a silly moment between all of them. “It was only a few hours and her painting touched me in ways that I don’t even know if I can explain.”

“Hmm…” Hershel didn’t even take the time to comment, his eyes shifting down toward the ground when Beau returned and it was Negan’s turn to toss his clothes in the back after changing. During that time Hershel was really quiet. In front of Beau, Hershel would no doubt be a different man. And when it was her turn to change, she watched Hershel point over toward Beau’s work. “You’re a very talented kid you know. You’re going to do big things with your talents one day. Nice work.”

“Thank you,” Beau’s raspy voice was heard as she rounded the corner. At least she was proud of her father for that. When she was younger, she never got compliments from her father when it came to her art.

Once she was done, she returned and realized how ridiculous they all looked standing there in towels with their socks on, “I’ll spray your clothes and shoes down. Get back to the house fast and try not to get paint all over.”

“Yes sir,” Beau offered up a charming smile, similar to the one that Negan would often give people. A smile that Y/N had gotten used to over the last few months working with him.

Their walk back to the house was quick since it was snowing and Maggie had met them at the door. She offered to let Beau use her bathroom since her and Glenn were going to go pick up some food for the family. Beau accepted and Negan offered to wait in his room while Y/N took the other shower in the bathroom on the second floor.

But when Negan knew Maggie had left with Glenn and the rest of the family was busy, he snuck into the bathroom with Y/N, surprising her when he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. Nuzzling his nose in against the side of her neck had her biting back on a sigh, “Are you sure you want to be in here with everyone here?”

Pressing a faint kiss against the side of her neck, Negan growled and heard her laugh, “They are all downstairs anyways. I think Erin is entertaining your father and Annette.”

Stepping back, Negan tugged at his towel and tossed it aside. Pushing at his boxer briefs, Negan kicked out of them and saw her smirk, looking down between them. A wolfish smile tugged at Negan’s handsome features when her eyes raised again, “We look fucking great right now.”

“I don’t know about that,” she chuckled feeling Negan tugging at her towel and tossing it beside his. Getting undressed, she saw Negan brace himself when he pulled his socks off and tossed them in the pile of their clothes at the center of the floor.

Once they were naked, Negan moved in behind her and urged her to look at them in the mirror and she immediately reached up to cover her face. Laughing, Negan reached for her hands to get them to move down, “Negan! We look fucking ridiculous.”

“I wish we had my phone because I would take a picture,” Negan responded with an entertained sound as she placed her hand in over the center of his chest to brace herself.

“With us being buck ass naked and covered in paint?” she found hilarity in that statement. “We look terrible.”

“Correction. The bodies look great, we just look like we were in a very bad accident at a home improvement store,” Negan pinched at her bottom eliciting a gasp to fall from her lips. Leaning in closer to her Negan gave a silly pose and she playfully pushed into his side. “Don’t be embarrassed. This is fun. This is silly. It’s cute.”

“I don’t think anyone would find it cute with you and me being naked together here,” she acknowledged, sliding her hands up the lengths of his abdomen toward his chest, twisting her fingers through the dark curls of hair that covered his flesh.

“You’re going to give me a hard on and I’m really trying to be innocent here. We don’t have time for shower sex,” Negan frowned causing her to roll her eyes and step back away from him. Looking down, Negan huffed and shook his head. “I have kind of a chubby right now as it is.”

Reaching for Y/N’s hand, Negan led her over toward the shower and turned the water on. Making sure that the water was at an appropriate temperature, he helped her into the shower and moved in behind her.  

Hearing her sigh once the warmth of the water poured in over them, Negan leaned forward and braced his hands against the wall trapping her in his arms, “You know, I wouldn’t care if your family fucking knew we were together anyways. At this point, who fucking cares?”

“You would when my father found out you were cheating on Maggie,” Y/N turned in his arms to face him, her hands caressing in over the sides of Negan’s body while he stood before her. “When we tell them about us, it will have to be without my father.”

“I’m not scared of your father,” Negan hummed, his eyebrows arching up and she tipped her head to the side. “I can’t help who I fell in love with. And if he can’t handle that? Then tough shit.”

“So brave now,” she shook her head watching Negan’s hands drop from the wall and he closed the distance between the two of them. “It will be different when we have to tell them.”

“I know how I feel Y/N,” Negan hushed her, capturing her jaw between his thumb and index finger. Swiping his thumb over her flesh, Negan shook his head and lowered down in closer to her. “I don’t care what anyone else thinks.”

“You know what I think?” she spoke in a whisper with their lips inches apart. Negan’s long eyelashes fluttered and when their eyes connected, she let out a tiny laugh. “I think my ass is going to be bruised tomorrow from how hard we fell before Maggie came in.”  

Grumbling out, Negan urged her to turn so he could get a look at her ass and she gasped, “Negan!”

“It looks fine to me,” Negan claimed, nuzzling his nose in against the side of her neck. Palming over her bottom had her letting out a tight exhale and Negan chuckled against her flesh. Pooling at the drain was the mixture of paint colors being cleaned from them and Negan found himself happy in that moment. “You made my son happier today than anyone has in a very long time.”

Unhurriedly, Negan’s palms slid in over her hips then in over her lower abdomen where her fingers hooked with his, “I think we all had a pretty good time there for a little while.”

“Maggie would disagree,” Negan snorted, his nose wrinkling when she turned to face him again. Reaching up, she palmed in over the side of his face and giggled when she saw that some of the paint was still sticking to him. Attempting to help him get it off, she stepped in closer to him and rest her head against the center of his chest when a big laugh fell from her throat. “Thank you for what you are doing with Beau. You have no idea how much it means to me. My boy lost his smile for a while and it was nice to see it back tonight.”

“I’m just happy he had fun,” she stroked her fingers over the center of his chest. “He’s a good kid. You raised him right.”

“I can only take so much credit for that. His mother did a really good job with him too. They were best friends,” Negan informed her, wrapping her up in his arms and sighing when she cuddled in closer to him. Caressing his hand down over the length of her back, Negan frowned and shook his head. “I was really worried about what would happen to him after we lost his mother, but he’s been so good. I think he’s taken great care of his little sister. And he’s taken care of me when it should be the opposite. I’m so fucking lucky to have that boy in my life.”

“Is it bad that I don’t want to leave this position?” she wondered knowing that she felt the calmest she had in a very long time under the spray of water with Negan holding onto her like he was. “I can’t even believe we are doing this.”

“I’m very comfortable myself,” Negan snickered, pressing a kiss over her forehead and giving her another tight squeeze pulling her close to his body. It was surprising how this wasn’t sexual at all, just more of a sweet intimate moment between the two of them. “I don’t think it’s wrong to want to keep feeling good when you were trained to force yourself to feel bad all the time.”

“I love you,” she lifted her head, reaching up to brush her fingers through his wet hair. “I really do. If you would have told me I would have been feeling this way a week ago, I would have told you to fuck off.”

“Well, that reaction is one people often do have when they think about me,” Negan teased, his nose wrinkling when he urged her to face the showerhead. Caressing his hands up the sides of her body, Negan reached for the shampoo and started to lather her hair with the soap that was there. It was kind of romantic and sweet that he was doing it and she found herself in awe of him. “I do piss people off a lot. And I guarantee you when we get back to work, even though you will be absolutely fucking smitten with me, I’m still gonna piss you off and you’re gonna want to choke me.”

“God,” she scoffed, turning in his arms and stealing the shampoo returning the gesture by soaping up his hair as well. Tipping up on her toes, her lips hovered over his and she shook her head, “We’ll save the choking for our alone time.”

“You’re a freak. I like it,” Negan snickered against her flesh, capturing her lips in a kiss that drew her further up on her toes toward him. Stepping forward, he got them further under the water so they could get the shampoo out of their hair. “I’m pretty sure I’d let you do any fucking thing to me honey. And I’d enjoy it.”

“You better,” she nipped at his bottom lip before going to get the body wash to work to scrub the paint off with Negan’s help. “Your son told me that he doesn’t see the spark between me and Glenn. The spark that you and his mother had.”

“He’s a perceptive little man,” Negan noted while they finished getting cleaned up together in the small shower. “And he’s not wrong.”

“I didn’t lie to him though. I told him that I agreed and I didn’t think I belonged with Glenn,” she was honest with Negan about the conversation she had with his son. “Is that bad?”

“Nope. He’s very easy to talk to and I don’t think he’s going to go running to Glenn to tell him,” Negan explained to her, turning off the shower after they were done. Getting out, he reached for a new towel and held it out for her. Getting out of the shower carefully, she stepped forward only to feel Negan wrapping her up in the new towel. With Negan peppering kisses over the side of her neck, she couldn’t help but laugh at the way it felt with his short beard against her flesh. “Eventually you will have a talk with Glenn and he’s a nice guy. I’m sure he will understand.”

“He’s so fucking nice Negan,” she let out a hesitant breath, her eyebrows furrowing when she thought about the man she had been dating for quite some time. “I can only imagine how he is going to take things once I tell him.”

“He’ll survive,” Negan assured her, grabbing a hold of her hands to give them a tight squeeze. Stepping back, he reached for a new towel for himself to wrap around his waist. Standing in front of the mirror, he took a long look at himself and huffed. Slicking his hair back, he felt her arms wrapping around him from behind. Caressing over the lengths of his long, slender abdomen she used him to brace up on her toes so she could press faint kisses over his freckle covered shoulders. “If I don’t get to be with you, I won’t survive. I can fucking promise you that.”

“You’re so dramatic,” she snickered against his flesh, stepping back and away from him, hearing his snort follow. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.”

“Hold me. Kiss me. Love me. Fuck me,” Negan’s voice growled, turning on his heel to face her noticing the flush of color that flooded her features. “Spank me. Yell at me. Cuddle me. Whatever your heart desires. Just don’t break my heart.”

“Goddamn it. You are so fucking cute it’s frustrating,” she laughed, pushing her fingers into the center of his chest making his thick eyebrows furrow. The expression he made caused her heart to flutter in her chest. It was like he was pouting and she shook her head. “You look like a fucking puppy when you use those fucking eyes on me.”

“Sexiest puppy you’ve ever seen,” Negan bobbed his head about eliciting a laugh from deep within her. Moving around him, she started putting her clothes on and Negan frowned. “I like being naked with you.”

“You technically are still very much naked under that towel,” she reminded him, pointing down at the towel that was wrapped loosely around his hips. “Did you bring your clothes with you?”

“I did not,” Negan let out a tense breath looking down at the towel that he was wearing. Pulling it apart, Negan held his arms out and he was purposely trying to flash her. “It’s almost a shame we took a shower together and we didn’t get to do anything in the shower.”

“I like what we did,” she responded, turning toward him to drag her index finger down over the center of his chest circling his nipple with her fingertip before dragging it down further. When her fingers dragged across his hip, it had his eyes narrowing and his breathing grew louder. “Better close up that towel tightly and go get dressed.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan frowned, pulling the towel tightly together and knotting it. “You’re a tease.”

“Says the man who was just flashing me his penis,” she leaned in closer to him, the warmth of her breath lingering over his lips.

“You like it so much, I thought I’d leave you with the image of me soaking wet, completely nude…” Negan’s dimples became more prominent with his whispering, “that way it helps you get through the rest of the day.”

“What helps you get through the rest of the day? Imagining it in my mouth or inside of me?” she purred and Negan growled in response.

“Both are incredible choices,” Negan noticed her stroking small shapes over the center of his chest and he smiled. “Now the idea of me coming down your throat is very appealing. We haven’t done that yet.”

“We’ll have to see if we can make that happen,” she hushed him, pushing her fingers into his chest to get him to step back. “But not right now.”

“Tease,” Negan rolled his eyes, reaching for the door to leave, but he rethought it. Lowering down, he nuzzled his nose in against the side of her face. Noticing what he was asking for, she laughed and turned just enough to meet Negan in a quick kiss. After he peppered a few more kisses over his lips, he pulled the door open and went to move out into the hallway.

“Fuck! Beau,” Negan gasped when he came face to face with Beau who was just coming out of Maggie’s room. They both froze when they saw one another and Negan clung tightly to the door. Tipping his head to the side, Beau eyed over Y/N. The color had drained from both Negan and Y/N’s faces after he had caught them in the bathroom together pulling away from a kiss. Grasping tightly to the towel that he was wearing, Negan cleared his throat and noticed the smirk that pressed in over Beau’s young features. Rubbing a towel through his wet hair, Beau shook his head and moved out of Maggie’s room stepping out into the hallway. “Listen…I…”

“Can explain?” Beau finished for Negan, his jaw flexing as he let out a tense laugh. Shrugging his shoulders, Beau didn’t seem to be too bothered by things. Y/N moved in beside Negan in the doorway and Beau eyed over the stairs to make sure they were alone. “I told you dad, I’m not asking questions. When you’re ready to tell me something. You will. Nor am I going to be talking to anyone about anything. Because it’s none of my business.”  

“We didn’t do anything,” Y/N assured Negan’s son with a panicked voice, her eyes looking terrified when she saw the way that Beau was looking between them. “I swear. It was very innocent.”

“Okay,” Beau shrugged his shoulders pointing toward the stairs. “You think we should go figure out what Erin is doing with your family? I think sugar cookies are out of the question until tomorrow, don’t you? With all of us being covered in paint earlier.”

“As long as you are okay with that,” she breathed out, surprised how well Beau was taking seeing her and his father coming out of the bathroom together soaking wet with his dad still in a towel. Giving them a small nod, Beau handed the towel that he had over to his father and Negan eagerly accepted it. “I just want you happy.”

“And I just want both of you happy,” Beau released a long sigh, folding his arms out in front of his chest. “So whatever it takes for you both to be happy? I’m okay with it. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you happy dad. So do whatever you have to do. I’m a big boy and I understand that.”

“I feel like we should talk,” Negan suggested hearing Beau snicker and shake his head. Beau’s eyebrows bounced up and Negan wrapped the towel that Beau gave him around his shoulders. “I’m sure you have some questions and…”

“Dad, another time. I think you need to go get dressed before someone else comes up here,” Beau pointed toward his father from where he was standing still dressed in nothing but a towel. “I am going to go check on Erin and make sure she’s not starting a fire or anything.”

“Beau,” Negan spoke up, walking out into the hallway with his son and Beau threw his hands up in the air. “I just think…”

“When you’re ready, you’ll talk to me,” Beau repeated, moving for the stairs. “Until then, I saw nothing. And I know nothing.”

“Shit,” Negan cussed, his hands sliding in over his hips when Beau made it down the stairs. “Do you think he knows?”

“He’s thirteen Negan,” she pointed out and Negan gazed back over his shoulder at her, his expression showing that he didn’t know how to take that answer. “I’m pretty damn sure he knows.”

“I told you he was fucking perceptive,” Negan grumbled under his breath and stepped back toward the stairs that led toward the attic. “I should go get dressed.”

“That makes sense,” she agreed with him, not sure how to respond to things. Going to head back into the bathroom, she felt Negan grabbing a hold of her wrist to pull her back to him. Cupping her face in his large hands, he urged her to him so he could leave her with a lingering kiss that took her breath away. “Negan?”

“I just want you to know that I don’t regret this,” Negan whispered, drawing his thumb across her bottom lip, his head shaking from side to side. “Even if my son figured this whole thing out. I’m not ashamed of this. I never will be. I fucking love you.”

“I love you,” she whispered, accepting another quick kiss from Negan. After he headed up the stairs she went back into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. Resting back against it, she took a minute to gather herself. She hoped that Beau didn’t think that she was doing everything that she was because of her relationship with Negan.

----

Tags: @slutlanna976 @fuckthis-and-fuckthat @jennydehavilland @de-gabyconamor @ibelongtonegan @smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams  @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan @redmercysugar @caprithebunny @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted @akumune​ @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx  @haleygreen23 @xhannahbananax03 @sanctuaryforthelost @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight @ayumi-wolf @hollyismentallyillhelp @promiscuousbarnes​ @tone-stark @lanadelnegan @flippittygibbitts @stickyhuesos

[chemicallywrit]

Audio Drama Sunday!!!

Again this is far from comprehensive because I am a feral podcast monster, but here’s what stuck out to me this week! Mostly spoiler-free, unless you count vibes as spoilers!

🗡️ Cry Havoc! Ask Questions Later managed to have a happy? Ending? Honestly the way it managed to be a hilarious historical sitcom with an ending that chilling was MASTERFUL. Great job writers, y’all are fantastic. It is obviously not absolutely true to what we know about Roman history, but it is true to the spirit of it in a way that’s really satisfying for me personally.

🦀 @thesiltverses oh MAN. The way this story says again and again that you cannot earn your way out of being trampled by a system that doesn’t care about you hits every. Single. Time. And what are you going to do, try to remake that system? There are always going to be people who can’t handle that and fight against you, to their own detriment. This story is fantastical and exaggerated, but it’s always so real at the same time.

👁️ @hellofromthehallowoods is trying to kill me, straight up. I have no idea what Halloween will bring for this show and i’m dying. It’s very difficult to predict storylines on Hallowoods and that’s something I love about it. Will this pair break up? Will this pair die for their cause? Will this pair find each other again, even through death? Shoutout to the great guests this episode, I always enjoy seeing who Mx Wellman invites into the world.

🔎 @knovesstorytelling okay look, y’all, I have never read Northanger Abbey, so I don’t know why Kit’s being told to pack her bags and get out, and I am so UPSET. What’s going on????

📉 Within the Wires is back!! And my WORD, the juxtaposition of this season being motivational tapes while listening to the current season of The Dream about life coaches?? I am transfixed and horrified, let’s GO.

🎟️ @longcatmedia Mockery Manor. I love these clowns so much. I love that Bette is really smart and really dumb at the same time. Everyone’s acting is top notch, but I’m especially a fan of Karim Kronfli in this show. Everyone knows he’s got the range, but it’s so fun listening to him be this fussy little guy.

👻 One of the shows I’ve been catching up on is Ghosts in the Burbs, a deceptively spooky and delightfully witty single-narrator ghost show. I’m listening through the Lilith arc and….woof. WOOF. I know how it ends and it’s still terrifying.

🩸 IT’S HEMOPHOBIA DAY, omg, everyone please check out Hemophobia, I am so excited for Hemophobia. It’s sitting in my queue staring at me with that creepy-ass logo art. I’ve talked with CSW about this show and heard the trailer—religious trauma horror with amazing sound design and an amazing cast??? You kidding???? I am drooling over here. Join me, won’t you?

🧟‍♀️ This week is also the premier of The Dead! As soon as that feed appears I’ll be putting it everywhere, and I’m so excited to show everyone the first series. You’ve heard of snakes on a plane….

💐 On my end, as Re: Dracula continues its march to the finale, this week I find myself recording Inn Between and The Dead. I am still trying to make rent ahead of my new job’s first paycheck, so if you liked this post or the other things I do, would you consider sending me a ko-fi?

Now if you’ll excuse me, I will be listening to Hemophobia very quietly and very scared by myself in the dark. Until next week!

[lovejosephquinn]

Hey darling, I hope you're having a great day. I love your work and your writing BTW.

Since I'm a big sucker for any FRIENDS TO LOVERS theme, how about you've been in a friends group with Joe for a few years now. After all this mayhem (aka rise to fame) that happened to him this year, you finally meet him again in your group. You reconnect, still the same flirting between the two of you.

I JUST NEED ALL THE FRIENDS TO LOVERS FLUFF RIGHT NOW (no need for smut though)

Since, a touch-starved anon ❤️

Thank you so much 🥰

Absolutely joining you in being a sucker for friends to lovers, it's my most favourite trope. I'm really not proud of this however and I think it could've been much better; but I'll let you all decide! 🥺

You know the saying? keep your friends close... That was exactly your life's motto, they were for life and the close circle that you'd had over the last few years got you through anything. It wasn't until 2020 that you suddenly learnt you could be ripped apart from the person you were closest too in such a brief moment. The day that Joe got the phone call, the one that changed his life forever. You'd always secretly had a thing for him, not wanting to ruin your chances in case he didn't feel the same, but you kind of wished you'd told him before he'd got on the plane to go to America just a few days later.

Then covid hit, it just seemed to be one thing after another. Yeah you'd all manage to video call every now and then from your homes but it wasn't the same as actually being around one another. You'd have brief encounters through your phone with your friends and singular late night ones with him as if you didn't have anything else to say, you'd ramble on together till the early hours. Joe returned months later back to America to continue filming and the calls and texts came few and far between, he was busy all of the time and it wasn't entirely his fault but you got worried that this was it; that he'd forget you especially and you'd never see him again the way you always had, just merely through a television screen instead. It was different when everything he'd done had been filmed quite close to home, so you knew you'd always find him back at his flat eventually, but not having him around hurt and it made the feelings grow evermore; painful yet sinful when you'd think about him in every way possible.

You'd lost count of the many times you thought of him, keeping him in the forefront of your mind at all costs, day or night, no matter what you were doing, wondering mostly what life will be like for Joe after Stranger Things aired. You had spent countless hours over the years telling him to be patient, comforting him when he almost gave up on acting. You promised him the day that he sent his audition tape that he'd make it big, that one day someone would notice his talent and he'd take off into the industry big time. He'd just smile at you the way he did, his dimples approving of your promise but the look in his eyes, sorrowful and scared told an entirely different story.

Surely enough, the day that Season 4 aired, you and your friends were sat in your living room watching it, you all cheered when Joe came on the screen, shouts of excitement and gasps at the look of your friend with a long haired curly wig, clothes that just were not him, for example the ripped black skinny jeans, that was entirely mesmerising. Your mind was boggled at the way it didn't even look like him anymore, it was only his chocolatey gaze that reassured you Joe was behind that get up. His acting was outstanding to you all, giving him a mental standing ovation that he was on his way to stardom through his new role, he shined brighter than you'd ever known him too.

He'd stayed in America finishing off bits and pieces for Volume two, he'd facetimed you one day in his trailer after not hearing from him for a month, you stared him down the second his face filled your screen as he was in costume, ready to go film the last scene before they wrapped up. He caught you gawking a few times, he'd have you stuttering in response.

"What're you staring at?" How did he realise that was the case? Prick.

"N-n-nothing."

"You got the hots for me in a wig?" Joe barked a laugh, you instantly threw yourself into self defence mode shaking your head, your cheeks flushing in confirmation which made his smile beam from ear to ear.

You even called him Eddie instead of Joe at least twice, embarrassing yourself deeply but the laugh that erupted from his throat made it more than worth it. It wasn't until you both said at exactly the same moment that you missed one another, your voices spoke in unison and the emotion came crashing between you in an instant was electrifying, but you shook it off quickly when he got shouted from the door of his trailer shortly after and the call was ended abruptly, a pout from Joe's lips, his little puppy dog eyes giving you an apologetic look that he had to rush off. You didn't have time to speak about your feelings, you'd planned it all in your head the second you got to talk to him, but it just never came about - you were grateful yet full of regret.

Some time later, the group of you re-joined and sobbed hard through Volume 2, all decided collectively that he seriously deserved an award for this role, especially from the fact he could make fully grown men tear up at their own friend dying on camera. Your promise of 2 solid years ago came true and exactly 24 hours later, your social media was bombarded with Joseph Quinn this and Joseph Quinn that. Eddie Munson had created your friend celebrity status in the matter of a mere moment.

It wasn't until the summer that you'd all taken the time out of your busy adult lives to throw a party especially in Joe's honour for returning home, a nail biting experience for you indeed. Your friendship circle wasn't the same without him so it wasn't often that you'd all get together anymore. You couldn't wait to see him, you couldn't wait to tell him how proud you were and above all, you couldn't wait till you could utter the words I told you so. You'd done a number on yourself, making yourself look as good as possible so that he might notice. Your feelings overtaking you a little too much, maybe understandable after you'd not seen him solidly for the last year and a bit, so you thought you'd make an effort.

You watched through your kitchen window whilst you stood outside having a smoke with your friend, the front door opened and a crowd of people huddled around. A rush of nausea hit you like it was the first time you were seeing him again, the eye contact that was made between you through glass when people moved around to return to their previous conversation.

As the old saying goes in a sea of people, my eyes will always search for you, that quote was circling in your head until eventually Joe came sauntering out of the back door and you felt his presence solidly stood before you, staring, almost teary eyed from the obvious confirmation that he'd missed you the most. He looked the same, but different, his hair was curlier, face looked skinnier and body less defined from the weight he'd had to lose especially for the show but the same in the way his eyes sparkled and spoke a thousand words without him having to open his mouth.

You dropped the cigarette that was perched between your fingers and ran into his arms like some sort of romantic scene, wrapping yourself around him, your face held in position into his chest as he swayed you from side to side. You caught sight of a few people looking your way that were situated in the kitchen, one of them even mouthed get a room, mentally flipping a middle finger their way; all you cared about in that second was that Joe was around you again.

"God I've missed you Joey." You cooed, your voice slightly muffled from your face smothered into his chest.

"Missed you too love." The happiness radiated from his voice and butterflies swarmed your stomach.

People had always noticed in the past the flirty exchanges between the two of you. People had always commented that you would look cute together, there were only a couple of people out of the entire friendship group that knew of your true feelings, they'd been sworn to secrecy on the matter that Joe would never find out. There were always talks between all 3 of you, they'd always confronted their beliefs that they were 99% sure that he felt the same way but he was too damn shy and too stubborn of a person to admit it. If that was true then that made two of you.

The girl who stood outside with you had disappeared to let you have some time alone with Joe, patting him on his forearm as a brief encounter as she left to go back inside. She was one of the people that knew of your secret and had only in these last five minutes been telling you that you needed to make a move before it was too late. That you couldn't watch from the side-lines forever, twiddling your thumbs and gawking at him from a distance.

Indulging in another cigarette together, not quite being ready to go inside and share him with the rest of your friends just yet, you playfully and skilfully caught up with him, finding ways to bring into the conversation that all you wanted was him.

"You know Quinn, you've really broke the internet with Eddie. He's everywhere." You muttered and he rolled his eyes, not quite believing you.

"Stop saying silly things like that." He laughed, you pulled out your phone, showing him some of the screenshots you'd taken and they rolled back around swiftly, his lips parting at the wonderful things people had said about his character, unsure what to do with all the strange love coming from random people he didn't know.

"Did they let you keep the wig by the way?" Joe frowned, looking back to you, putting your phone back into your pocket and folding your arms together.

"I knew you had a thing for Eddie." Joe smirked. Not Eddie. You you fool.

"The wig made you think that?" You laughed over dramatically.

"I saw the way you looked at me on FaceTime Y/N, you were down bad for me with long hair." He stuck his tongue over his top lip, his stare intense waiting for your admission.

"Correction, Eddie..." You threw him off his high horse. "Yeah well, what can I say? A sexy ass metal head is just my type." You joked. His eyes grew with your response.

"I'd better get it back then." What was that supposed to mean? Your mind was all over the place in just 6 short words. "I've already got the leather jacket." He continued.

"Phew, I was scared you were going to miss that out." Stifled and forced giggles fell from your lips, you were nervous from the way Joe looked at you differently in that second, something told you it was good. You stood in silence for a few minutes and Joe looked through the window to see the rest of his friends deep in conversation.

"You wanna get going back in?" He said anxiously before moving toward the door.

"I told you so." You belted out quickly, grabbing at his hand, holding onto his fingers as if your life depended on it, he moved back towards you, a look of confusion taking over him.

"Wait, what?" He chuckled.

"I promised you that this was it for you. I told you so." You smiled, mirroring the shyness on his face, he softened in seconds.

"Don't be daft." His hand wrapped around yours, reciprocating the grasp as he swung it side to side, not letting go, even if your palms were now sweating from the soft touch, this somehow felt right.

"Well I'll always be your number one fan." You winked and his lips pursed together in the most adorable way, smiling as he looked to the ground. His free hand came up to stroke your cheek and it was like all of a sudden you'd fell into a dream that was all too familiar when you were sleeping.

Without any forewarning, Joe leaned down, replacing his fingers for his lips and planted a kiss on your cheek, his mouth hovering still against the heat from your face after, unsure whether he should of committed an act like that. Then he did it again, giving your hand a squeeze in reassurance when he stood back in his previous stance, an exhale of relief that you didn't let go or just bolt from his actions.

"I had no doubt that you would be, my darling." Your mutual stare became something intimate, you weren't sure where this was going but you were pretty sure that from that one moment, he'd always felt exactly the same and had just admitted it in his own way. Nobody had ever looked at you the way Joe did tonight.

[mislamicpearl]

Thoughts about Ninjago DR S2 eps 18-20 (finale):

I'll put the summary here so the spoilers can stay hidden. Overall, I think this might be my favorite part of Dragons Rising so far. So many things have been improved upon by leagues from season 1, with the villains being more likable, the setting and plot way more interesting, the new characters growing into their own, no more filler side plots, even the humor is better. While of course it wasn't flawless it is finally making me excited and eager to see the next season, rather than cautious and apprehensive, and not even just because I want to see the OG characters, but because I'm genuinely invested in the new gen ones.

And now for the spoilers:

Lmao Zeatrix went all uwu suddenly with that apology. But it is nice to see she's not an all the way bad person like her sister (maybe). Wonder what she'll do now?

Wyldfyre schooling her on how to apologize was so cute haha. And her suggestion of punishment hilarious. (Also when are we going to get more about how she grew up??)

It's fun seeing Wyldfyre and Arin as a duo together (despite how sad it is that Arin is still rebuffing Sora).

"Normal people lock doors. I was raised by dragons and even I know that." So many good Wyldfyre moments in this episode.

Okay Lloyd is unconscious but Zane and Cole are RIGHT THERE to help you instead Sora, you know they're spinjitzu masters too right? Heck they LITERALLY used to be teachers at one point!

Aw, Frak is a good boy actually, I like him.

The way Sora balanced on her tiptoes at the edge like that was cool haha

When Jordana handed Sora the note with the math equation on it my sister said "Sora, help me with my homework", and for some reason that made me and my other sister crack up so much we had to pause the video.😆

Yeah knew it, Roby was a red herring, of course the old guy who likes tradition is the bad one.🙄

Ahahaha Arin jumping on the exercise ball and it launching away was too real. XD

I'm not a fan of shows making young characters not know what older technology is, so I was glad that Arin called it a rotary phone, BUT it was also funny when Wyldfyre said she still doesn't know what they are because in HER case it actually makes sense.

Also my sisters reminded me that Lloyd, who's likely close to a decade older than Arin, didn't know what a VHS tape is, which makes it even funnier.

Woah woah woah what the heck that evil lair was DISTURBING, bro wants to murder his own nephew!

Love we're still continuing the joke that no one can remember Jordana's name.

Yooooo Lloyd saw Arin betraying him in a vision!😭 This boy is going to get traumatized worse than Wu with Morro.

Oh okay, Cole temporarily got his powers back through the Chekhov's gun mech, sure. I mean it's not the first time characters have gotten their powers back after losing them just through sheer will, and you know what, this isn't even the worst way it's been done, so whatever. Also guess the mech really did belong to Lilly.

Lloyd used wind!!! That feels SO satisfying somehow. Just imagine Morro's reaction if he'd seen. XD

Yikes, freaky mask...

Wyldfyre is a smart cookie with that switcheroo.

Oh my gosh, Cole's reaction to seeing Wu was so sweet, he missed him so much.😭

He really asked if he died omg

Sora's apology to Jordana was so sweet, I hope she heard it all.

Zur is revealed to actually be a very nice guy haha. (Had to search up his name though, seriously why are all the names of the new characters so unintelligible?)

I like that Arin feeling even more betrayed that Lloyd didn't immediately leave Sora's fight to deal with his revelation that Wu caused the merge, felt believable; he's young and already not in a good mental space right now, and mixed with his anger at Sora and not having learned proper spinjitzu from Lloyd, it's no wonder he'd feel especially bitter towards Lloyd not giving him more credence in favor of helping Sora, the new golden child, even if that's not what Lloyd was doing. Like really, Arin's whole "turning to the dark side" arc is written crazy good!

Lmao why was Geo cheering Nokt's win??

Nothing like making sure the audience knows your new protagonist is better than the old ones by having the previous protagonist tell her so. Hey I know that's just Lloyd trying to be a good teacher by encouraging her after her loss but still, that line felt kinda self-indulgent on the writers' part.

What do you know, someone evil took all the powers and stopped you from taking them back with the cup, Roby. Actually, what's the point in giving all the powers to the winner in the end when they're gonna return to their original owners anyway? It's not like they'd need them to fight.

So uhhh was it PLANNED by Nokt and Rox for Sora the tech master to be their final opponent? Cause there's no way they could've known that (especially considering her first match was rigged to sway in her opponent's favor), much less that she would've used her powers to remove the shock collar thingy.

DANG Ras not holding back with that warhammer, that looked painful! XD

Nya came back! Without Jay but I'm glad she's not missing the finale.

Again, Frak is a good boy. He deserved to say that "ninja go"

"I sincerely detest rising dragon" lmao at that line delivery XD

Oh my God Roby, how long does it really take to activate that cup thing?? Stop talking and just do it!

THAT 360 FIGHT AGAINST NOKT WAS SO COOL!

"How did you learn perfect spinjitzu?" "Not from you." BRO I KNOW I WANTED ARIN TO THROW IT IN HIS FACE BUT THAT WAS SO COOOOLD!!😩

Okayyy see Wyldfyre roaring in Roby's face instead of going for the kiss? That's more in character for her and really funny. And Roby just going with it? Very sweet.Still, glad this is going to stay a long distance relationship.

KAAAAIIII! Kai coming to save their butts! Kai soloing Nokt! Kai saying "don't you dare touch her"!!!

Nokt really said he would end Kai with his own daughter's powers, I can't

Love Euphrasia taking out Cinder immediately after they got their powers back. XD Good girl!

I really felt Lloyd and Sora's heartbreaking cries for Arin, it's just like seeing a father and daughter losing their son/brother.😭

Awwww the group hug tackle on Kai!

But... I'm a little disappointed Kai and Cole couldn't get their own moment together, since they're reuniting for the first time after the merge.

Aww but the Cole and Bonzle hug was cute.

Look, I don't dislike Sora as a character or anything, but calling her the "greatest elemental master of the merged realms" isn't sitting right with me. She only won by default against Nokt, without even knowing rising dragon technique, and probably would've lost to Frak too if he hadn't had a change of heart. The entire tournament was purposefully written so that she'd be the winner; Nya would've beaten Nokt if Blekt hadn't cheated, and Lloyd was disqualified for being injured, not even to speak again of how Zane was taken out like garbage for no reason in the first round, without it even having been rigged like Cole's game was. Maybe this wouldn't bother me so much if Sora wasn't designed to look so obviously appealing to the "new gen" crowd with her pink-haired catgirl thing going on, I mean she looks just like an overly designed fan OC, but the fact that she's a child genius, and always being told by others how amazing she is - except of course by the people who were completely wrong about her and were getting in the way of her potential - and now being celebrated as "the best" mostly by circumstance... is kinda making her dangerously close to becoming a special snowflake in my book.

Oh hey it's Frohicky lol. Can't say I really felt his absence.🤷‍♀️

Love that Kai promised Nya they'd find Jay together, best big brother for real.

Lloyd already putting Arin's picture up like he departed, what is it with these ninja overreacting 🤣

*chants* ev-il Ar-in ev-il Ar-in!

[1mnobodywhoareyou]

not just a supplier of nightmares

Boggie | T | 5037 words On ao3 It's finally, finally, finally done! Thank you to @narcissusbrokenmirror for always putting ideas into my head and encouraging me to write the things. Thank you to @60sec400 for beta-ing this for me (us). Thank you to every single person who cheerled the writing of this fic by sending asks, reblogging snippets, everything! This is for all of us 😅 Enjoy!

Reggie sifts through the stack of videos beside the television. Bobby and his brothers had convinced their parents to add a few new ones to their collection since the last time the guys had been over and he’s excited to see what captures their attention.

Reggie grabs a video out of the pile, quickly reading the back and then passing it on to Alex who passes his approvals onto Luke and returns the rejections to Reggie. 

This is their typical movie night routine and it works well for them. It never takes long for them to agree on something. 

“Really? We’re jumping up to R-rated ones?” Alex asks doubtfully as he eyes the first tape he’s handed.  

“Yeah! Why not?” Reggie beams back at him. “We only get to do that at Bobby’s anyway!”

“Yeah, ‘Lex!” Luke agrees, shoving Alex’s shoulder. “Lighten up. When else do we get the freedom to do this?” Bobby’s house is the only one where they’re not under strict parental supervision. His parents are always either away for work or out supporting his older brothers. Even when they are home, they have a tendency to be pretty hands off with their parenting. Especially when the guys are over.

“Some of those are pretty freaky, guys,” Bobby warns them, only to be met with twin scoffs. He shrugs in resignation. “Alrighty, then. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

Alex furrows his brow but doesn’t otherwise protest. 

It only takes three tapes before Luke hands one to Bobby. Bobby slides it into the VCR without looking at it. He doesn’t even think about it. Never does. He always just trusts their selection and it works out. If he’s completely honest, he mostly just likes spending time with the guys. No school. No band stuff. Just them. 

Granted, the band stuff is new. 

Alex has played the drums since they’d first joined the school band in 5th grade but it took until this last year for Luke to convince their teacher to let him try the guitar. Of course, he picked it up immediately. He’ll easily take Bobby’s spot next year when they hit high school, never mind that Bobby’s been playing the guitar for as long as Alex has been on the drums. 

But that’s not the point. It’s fine. 

The point is that now Luke is convinced that they can make it as rockstars. He tried to convince Bobby to shift to bass but Bobby had no interest in learning a new instrument. Luckily Reggie volunteered to fill that gap, apparently not being satisfied with the three instruments he already played. 

So now they have a band. And the accompanying band ‘stuff.’

Which also takes up almost all of their free time. And Bobby loves it. He really does. But he misses his friends. 

So, movie night.

They settle onto the floor between the L of the two couches with their individual sleeping bags and two shared bowls of popcorn. 

As the tension for the first jumpscare builds, Luke puts his finger in his mouth before leaning over to stick it in Bobby’s ear. 

“Ugh, gross!” Bobby exclaims, wiping his ear with his sleeve. “Why are you like this?”

Luke giggles as he shrugs. “You’d miss me if I was gone,” he retorts. 

Bobby rolls his eyes and returns his attention to the television. 

“You guys made me miss it!” Reggie cries, crossing his arms over his chest. “All that build up wasted for nothing,” he mutters. 

Bobby and Luke exchange an amused look. After some quick nonverbal communication, they’ve made a plan.

They watch Reggie intently as the movie progresses. They want to make sure that they time this out perfectly for when he’s most on edge. Reggie leans closer and closer to the screen, gripping his blanket tightly under his chin. Bobby grins at Luke who nods back at him. They each grab one of Reggie’s sides as the characters on screen scream. 

Reggie screeches in terror. Bobby and Luke collapse with uncontrollable laughter. 

“Really?” Alex asks from Luke’s other side, unimpressed. 

Luke turns to Alex with another shiteating grin. He launches himself at Alex, wrapping one arm around Alex’s neck and using his free hand to give Alex a solid noogie. 

Reggie ignores them, turning his attention back to the movie. Alex accidentally shoves Luke into him, trying to fight Luke off. 

“You guys are wrecking the movie!” Reggie whines from where he’s still intently watching the television. “Shut up or go away!”

“Sir, yes sir!” Luke replies, complete with mock salute. 

They finish the movie mostly in peace with a few screams escaping Reggie and more than a couple moments of Luke and Reggie hiding behind Alex and Bobby.

Bobby gets up to rewind the tape and turn off the TV.

“So worth it,” Reggie enthuses. 

Luke hums his enthusiastic agreement as he snuggles down into his sleeping bag. 

Bobby and Alex exchange an amused look before following suit.

“Wait, no!” Reggie exclaims as he jumps up, “I gotta pee!”

The others laugh and roll their eyes, well used to Reggie’s antics at this point. 

They’re all asleep before he returns.  Reggie crawls into his own sleeping bag, careful not to wake the others as he settles in.

It takes Reggie a while to slow his thoughts. Now that the movie’s over and he’s forced to be alone with his mind, he finds himself replaying some of the scariest moments every time he closes his eyes. It’s dark and quiet. The gentle breathing of his friends next to him fails to offer any comfort. 

Eventually though, he manages to drift into a fitful sleep.

He’s not out for long when Bobby, Alex, and Luke are woken by an earth-shattering scream.

They jump up in a panic and notice Reggie writhing in his sleep. His face is scrunched up in fear, his hair damp with sweat.

Bobby grabs Reggie by the shoulders, shaking him lightly. “Reggie! Reg, wake up!”

Reggie moans in his sleep before curling up into a ball. Bobby shares a concerned look with Alex and Luke. Bobby tries shaking him again. Reggie moans and pushes him away. 

Alex tries next, speaking gently to Reggie. His attempts are no more successful than Bobby’s. 

“Reggie, wake up!” Luke shouts obnoxiously. Both Alex and Bobby glare at him, returning their attention to Reggie when he shifts. 

Bobby shakes him again and Alex coaxes him out of sleep. “Reggie? Hey, it’s just us. You’re having a bad dream.”

Reggie’s arms flail, hitting Bobby before grasping onto his shirt. Reggie clings to Bobby as his eyes crack open. Bobby gently rubs his back as he wakes up.

“Y’okay, dude?” Bobby asks as Reggie finishes coming into consciousness.

Reggie gasps for breath. “Had… a bad dream.”

“Yeah, Reg. You had a bad dream. We’re here though. What happened?”

Reggie shudders as he remembers. “I was… a-a-an apparition.” He barely manages the words as he struggles to return his breathing to normal. 

Luke’s brow furrows. “A what-arition?” he asks.

“A ghost, Luke,” Bobby tells him with a fond eye roll.

Reggie realizes that he’s attached himself to Bobby and lets go, wrapping his arms around himself. He shivers again, “I-I-I died! And then became a g-g-g-ghost!”

“Like, the kind that rattles chains and goes ‘boo?’” Luke wonders.

Reggie glares at him. “No, the kind that m-m-m-murders people!”

“Man, even if you DID become a ghost, I don’t think you could ever murder someone!” 

Alex sighs, “Luke you’re not helping. Can you shut up? Please?”

Luke ignores him, leaning into Reggie’s space, “Are you okay? What do you need?”

Reggie shakes his head and squeezes his legs tighter to his chest. 

“Do you want…” Luke starts to say before pausing to think, “do you want a hug?”

Reggie looks up at him. “Yeah,” he replies in a small voice. 

“Okay. Okay, we can do that!”

Luke lunges forward and wraps Reggie up into a tight hug. Reggie sinks into him, his body visibly relaxing.

“I’m gonna go get Reggie some water,” Alex says as he slips out of his sleeping bag.

“Can I…” Reggie says hesitantly into Luke’s shoulder. 

Alex stops, turning back toward them. “Can you what?”

Reggie pulls away from Luke, just enough to free his face. His expression turns sheepish. 

Bobby rubs his back, offering what comfort he can. “What is it, Reg? Whatever you need.”

Reggie takes a deep breath. “Can I have a snuggly?”

Alex’s eyes meet Bobby’s and Bobby nods his permission. They all stopped bringing their own stuffies to their sleepovers years ago so Alex will need to raid Bobby’s room to find something for Reggie. 

“Any requests?” Alex confirms, waiting for Reggie’s answer before heading up the stairs. 

“P-P-P-Petey? If you can find him?”

Alex nods, certain that the giant stuffed penguin won’t be difficult to hunt down. “Yeah, I can do that. Anything else?”

“Bring one for me too!” Luke demands brightly. 

Alex pauses at the base of the stairs. He pointedly holds his hand to his ear.

“Please,” Luke says shamefully.

“May’s well bring one back for each of us,” Bobby adds. “Thanks ‘Lex.”

“No problem. Be right back!”

Alex returns with his arms piled with various stuffed animals. He’s trying to balance a glass of water in his hand and has some snacks stuffed under his elbow. 

Luke jumps up to help him, passing the glass of water over to Reggie. 

Alex opens his elbows and lets the bags of treats fall onto the floor. He uses the newfound freedom of movement to pass the stuffies around, starting with giving Reggie Petey the Penguin. Reggie beams as he holds the animal tightly to his chest. Luke delicately tucks the lion he’s been handed in at the edge of his pillow and sleeping bag. Bobby sets his stuffed animal on the floor, backed up against the couch as if it were watching over the boys. Alex props his up on the seat behind his head, easily accessible for grabbing in the event that he decides he wants it. 

With Reggie sufficiently calmed and the others satisfied that he’ll be okay, they settle back in to sleep the last few hours of the night. 

If they all happen to wake up wrapped tightly around the stuffed animals, nobody mentions it. 

---

Unfortunately, it keeps happening. 

Every time they sleep over at Bobby’s, Reggie and Luke continue to pick out some of the scariest movies in the rental stack and every time, Reggie wakes up screaming. It only takes a handful of times for Bobby to put his foot down. He refuses to play any horror movies rated higher than PG, distressed by the need to comfort one of his best friends every time they watch one of these movies. Luke and Reggie are both frustrated at the sudden lack of freedom they’ve come to expect from their time at Bobby’s.

Try as he may, Reggie’s pleading looks aren’t as effective on thirteen year old Bobby as he’d like. A thirteen year old Bobby who isn’t fond of his sleep being disturbed on a good day, no less.

He can only keep it up for so long. After a few years, Bobby’s resolve does start to crumble. And it crumbles fast. 

“Bobby, c’mon man. We’re not thirteen anymore! I promise I can handle it!” Reggie pleads, desperately wanting to watch the recently released movie that nobody at school can stop talking about. 

Luke drapes his arm around Reggie’s shoulder. A pout matching Reggie’s paints his face, “Yeah, Bobs. We’re not kids anymore. Stop being such a funsucker.”

Bobby glares at Luke, “I am NOT a funsucker.”

Luke purses his lips doubtfully, “Mmmm, you kinda are.”

“Reggie doesn’t need to be more traumatized.”

Reggie squeaks, “I am NOT traumatized.”

Bobby stares at him.

Luke ruffles Reggie’s hair playfully. Reggie pulls himself out from under Luke’s arm to glare at him. Luke grins and ruffles his hair again.

Reggie rolls his eyes, directing his attention back to Bobby. Ignoring Luke is a well-honed skill at this point and he has higher priorities at the moment. 

Reggie puts on his most pathetic puppy dog face, fluttering his eyelashes dramatically and clasping his hands under his chin. He and Luke have always known the power their faces hold and regularly use it to their advantage. Though Reggie’s only recently realized how effective it can be with Bobby. With that realization has also come an exploration of how far he can push it.

It takes everything in Bobby to force himself to look away. He can feel Reggie’s gaze on him and he’s not able to ignore the pull for long. Bobby’s shoulders fall, his resolve crumbling. He turns back to meet Reggie’s eyes and sighs. “Fine. One time, we can try. But just once.”

Reggie whoops gleefully. 

They settle into their usual spots, which haven’t changed in the last two years, as Bobby sets up the movie. 

Much like when they were thirteen, Reggie and Luke still hide behind Alex and Bobby at the scariest parts. Much like when they were thirteen, Bobby teases Luke about it mercilessly. Much like when they were thirteen, Bobby and Alex share exasperated, though no less amused, looks over the antics of the other boys. Unlike when they were thirteen, these looks are now accompanied by a little more pink on their cheeks than either of them will ever be willing to admit to. 

Unfortunately, much like when they were thirteen, the boys are woken by Reggie deep in the throes of a nightmare. 

Unfortunately, unlike when they were thirteen, Bobby’s much less capable of resisting Reggie’s pleading. The scary movies continue, as do the nightmares and distressing wake up calls. 

---

“No.” 

“Please.”

Alex hands the tape back to Luke and crosses his arms across his chest. “No!” he repeats.

All three of them turn to look at Alex with confusion. He’s refused every option that Luke and Reggie have proposed, a stark shift from the routine they’ve had for years. 

“No scary movies,” he explains simply. 

Reggie furrows his brows, narrowing his eyes at Alex. “Why?”

“Because I don’t want to watch one.”

Reggie turns to him fully. “I can-,” he starts to say, ready to defend himself. He doesn't love being babied by his friends, even if he's appreciative of how much they care.

Alex cuts him off, “It’s not about you. I don’t want to watch a scary movie. Can we choose something else please?”

Reggie eyes him warily as he spins back around. He works on resifting through the tape collection, handing new suggestions to Luke who passes his approvals onto Alex. 

They finally agree on a Jurassic Park rewatch. 

As they settle in, Bobby directs an appreciative nod Alex’s way. Alex shrugs in silent acknowledgement.

---

Alex continues to refuse Luke and Reggie’s R-rated suggestions (of both the horror and “adult” variety) and their frustration grows.

It’s been months of this. It all comes to a head at the next sleepover at Bobby’s. They’d started drifting there more often, the appeal of the lack of parental supervision increasing as they grew older. As their own home lives became more hostile, Bobby’s place offered a bit of a safe haven for all four of them.

“Alex, why are you doing this?” Reggie groans after Alex hands back the most recent suggestion.

Alex stares at him blankly. “Doing what?”

“Why won’t you let us watch any of these?” Reggie gestures toward the rejected pile of movies. 

Alex shrugs, “Because I don’t want to watch them.”

“But why?”

Alex narrows his eyes at Reggie. “Does it matter why?” he challenges. 

Reggie takes the bait, straightening up and puffing out his chest, “Yeah, it does.”

“Why do you need to know?”

Reggie stares at Alex. “Because. We-” he gestures between himself and Luke, “both want to watch these. It’s not fair for you to get veto power if we can’t know why.”

“And,” Luke interjects, “we can’t pick different things if you won’t tell us what’s wrong with these.”

Alex rolls his eyes. “Because I don’t like girls,” he explains simply.

Reggie huffs out a frustrated breath and narrows his eyes at Alex, “You KNOW that’s not what I mean.”

“Fine. They scare me too much.”

Reggie directs an unimpressed glare his way. “Really?”

“Really,” he confirms, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Since when?”

“Since always.”

Reggie scoffs, “You never had issues with them before.”

Alex eyes him, “It doesn’t matter. I don’t want to watch them anymore. Or talk about it. Pick something else.”

Reggie stares Alex down. 

Alex stares back. 

Bobby clears his throat.

Reggie looks up at Bobby with wide, questioning eyes. He’s feeling both a little caught and a lot confused about why he’s not being backed up in this.

“Can we get on with this? Please?” Bobby pleads.

Reggie huffs, “Fine,” and turns back to the stack of movies. He finds something that he knows neither Luke or Alex are going to reject, passing it to Alex. He flops onto the couch while he waits for it to be approved by his friends. 

After setting up the movie, Bobby takes the spot beside Reggie. “We’re a little pouty today,” he observes quietly. 

Reggie halfheartedly tries to put some distance between himself and Bobby but doesn’t manage to go far. “Shut up.”

Bobby chuckles lightly as he leans back, looping his arm over Reggie’s shoulders. 

They settle in side by side to watch the movie much like they normally do, with Reggie shifting slightly so he can see the screen better, leaning into Bobby’s side. 

---

The next time Reggie spends the night at Bobby’s solo, he pleads his case again.

“C’mon Bee, please? “

“I don’t understand why you like freaking yourself out so much. We could do literally anything else. Something that won’t give you nightmares.”

Reggie shrugs, “I dunno. I just like them. And now with Alex…” he grimaces, “this is my only chance. Please?”

Bobby’s shoulders drop in defeat. He sighs. 

Reggie tries to hide his grin, knowing that means he’s about to win this one. “You’d be my favourite for FOREVER, Bobby,” he pleads, widening his eyes and jutting out his bottom lip.

“I’m already your favourite,” Bobby grumbles as he takes the tape from Reggie, sliding it into the VCR. 

Reggie flops onto the couch he and Bobby normally share, finally letting the victorious grin take over his face. “Thanks, Bobs. You’re the best!”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. Don’t come crying to me when you have a bad dream.”

Reggie crosses over his heart with a light giggle. His expression morphs into a frown when Bobby sits on the other couch. “We’re not sitting together?”

Bobby stares at him, “Did you want to?”

“We always do. Don’t you love me any more, Bobby?” Reggie asks, eyes wide as he tries and fails  to hide his teasing grin. 

Bobby rolls his eyes but gathers the blanket up and moves over to sit in the  open space beside Reggie. 

Reggie lets out a contented sigh as he leans into Bobby. “Much better! Can’t have scary movie times without my pillow.”

Bobby groans half-heartedly, “Good to know what I am to you. A pillow and supplier of nightmares.” He wraps his arm around Reggie’s shoulders just the same, though. 

“Exactly,” Reggie beams at him, “the best!”

Bobby fights the blush threatening to rise up his face, grateful that Reggie had turned his attention back to the television so quickly. He clenches his hand into a fist once, twice, three times, before letting himself relax again.

Bobby holds back a laugh the first time Reggie jumps under his arm, smirking at Reggie’s half-hearted glare.

When Reggie hides his face in Bobby’s shoulder at the next scary point, Bobby gently rubs Reggie’s back in comfort, his attention never drifting from the movie. It’s nothing they haven’t done before. Only this time, when Reggie turns back toward the screen, Bobby doesn’t stop. 

He seems to be moving mindlessly as his hand drifts down to settle on Reggie’s waist. Bobby gently caresses the space between Reggie’s shirt and the waistband of his jeans with his thumb. 

Reggie freezes up slightly, not expecting the much more intimate than usual contact. He quickly relaxes though, leaning back into Bobby. 

When his thumb starts to creep beneath Reggie’s waistband, Reggie starts to panic. Sure, he’s had a thing for Bobby for as long as he can remember, but he never expected that it might be reciprocated and he certainly didn’t expect for Bobby to be the one to initiate this kind of physical contact. 

He turns to look up at Bobby who seems completely unaware of the crisis that he’s inflicting on Reggie, intently watching the movie. 

It doesn’t take long for Bobby to register Reggie watching him, directing a questioning look down at Reggie.

“Something wrong?”

Reggie swallows thickly, “No. Nope. Everything’s fine.” He turns to look back at the TV.

The ministrations at his waist stop. Bobby starts to move away and Reggie gently covers Bobby’s hand with his own, keeping him in place. “You uh… you don’t have to stop,” Reggie whispers.

“I’m really sorry, Reg. I didn’t even realize…” Bobby starts to say, trying to defend himself as he attempts to stave off his own panic at realizing what he’d been doing. His chest tightens as he considers the discomfort he’s subconsciously subjected them both to, not to mention the fear of his feelings coming to light. 

“It’s okay,” Reggie insists quietly. “Really. You can stop if you want but uh…” his voice turns shy, “I… I like it.”

“Yeah?” Bobby coughs out breathlessly and Reggie nods. 

“Okay,” he whispers and directs his attention back to the movie.

It doesn’t take long before Bobby’s thumb starts moving over Reggie’s skin again.

Reggie finds himself completely incapable of paying any attention to what’s happening on-screen. He lets his own hand drift over to Bobby’s leg, running circles with his thumb on the inside of his knee.

Bobby looks down to acknowledge the unexpected contact but says nothing. 

After a short while, they shift and Reggie sits up slightly, swinging his legs around to drape over the front of the couch, still leaning into Bobby’s side. Bobby reaches down with his free arm and grabs Reggie’s knees. He rotates Reggie slightly and positions his legs over his lap, dislodging Reggie’s hand.

Reggie lets out a giggle, “I can’t see the movie like this.”

Bobby rolls his eyes and directs a fond look at Reggie, “You have no idea what’s been happening for at least the last half hour.” Reggie scoffs, mocking offense. “I’d know because you haven’t tried to hide once.”

“Shut up,” Reggie mutters and Bobby laughs. “You’re very distracting.”

“Yeah?” Bobby looks down at Reggie. 

“Yeah. Now shut up and watch your movie.”

“I put this movie on for you, remember?”

“You did not.”

“I did. You specifically requested it even. I was there.”

“You’re bullying me,” Reggie mumbles into Bobby’s chest.

Bobby laughs again, bringing his hand up to rub up and down Reggie’s back. Bobby’s other hand rests on Reggie’s knee. He starts drawing circles through the rips in his jeans with his thumb. If he’s going to be given permission to touch Reggie, he’s going to allow himself to follow some impulses. 

Reggie doesn’t bother trying to watch any more of what’s going on behind him. He settles for listening to it play in the background. He lets himself enjoy the feeling of being wrapped up with Bobby. It’s something he’d imagined before, sure, but the reality of having Bobby’s warmth surrounding him is more than he could have dreamed. He feels more at home, more at peace, then he’d even though possible. 

Reggie extends his arm around Bobby’s waist and starts to fiddle with the hem of his shirt as he listens to Bobby’s heartbeat, relishing in the feeling of Bobby’s hands on him. He chances a glance up at Bobby, smiling to himself when he notices Bobby’s stern look. His resting expression has always steered toward the stoic side of the scale and that remains true even as they allow themselves to explore this new development in their relationship.

Bobby’s hand migrates to Reggie’s thigh, still rubbing small circles with this thumb as he watches the movie. Reggie’s breath catches. He fights down the urge to kiss Bobby’s neck. He’s right there. He’d barely need to move.

Reggie’s fingers catch skin where he’d been playing with Bobby’s shirt, drawing Bobby’s attention back to the boy who’d wound up in his lap. 

He looks down at Reggie and barely hesitates before dipping his head down to kiss him. 

Reggie readily returns it. They work through the preliminary awkwardness quickly, moving their lips together as they find their rhythm. 

Bobby’s hand travels the rest of the way up Reggie’s thigh and to Reggie’s hip. He squeezes slightly to pull Reggie further around. 

Reggie takes the hint, repositioning himself so that he’s straddling Bobby, never breaking their kiss. Reggie wraps his arms around the back of Bobby’s neck, taking advantage of the new angle to deepen the kiss.

Bobby’s hands roam the expanse of Reggie’s back as he grants Reggie access to his mouth. He twines his own tongue with Reggie’s as he lets his hands venture down Reggie’s body.

Bobby grabs Reggie’s ass, eliciting a soft gasp from the other boy.

Bobby grins against Reggie’s mouth.

Reggie recovers quickly, pressing himself closer to Bobby as he again captures Bobby’s lips with his own. He moves his hands up to grasp at Bobby’s hair and tugs gently. He’s rewarded by Bobby’s groan and smirks delightedly to himself.

They continue to tease each other as they make out, experimenting with their teeth and tongues, learning what the other seems to enjoy.

When they finally separate to breathe, both panting to catch their breaths, Reggie laughs lightly, “We should have done that forever ago.”

Bobby wraps his arms tightly around Reggie’s middle, resting his face in the crook of Reggie’s neck. “Yeah,” he agrees, voice low. “Better late than never, or something.”

Reggie dislodges Bobby as he draws back. He directs a curious look at Bobby. “How late are you considering late?”

Bobby shrugs, pulling Reggie back toward him by tightening his arms around Reggie. “Does it matter?” 

Reggie laughs, “Well, it would be nice to know how long I wasn’t alone in this for.”

“Who says you were first?”

“Who says I wasn’t?”

Bobby reaches up to press a single kiss to Reggie’s lips. “Me,” he says with finality.

Reggie hums doubtfully.

“Dude, why do you think you kept getting away with,” Bobby waves toward the television now sitting ignored on the other side of the room, “this?”

“How do you know I wasn’t asking for them on purpose?”

“Because you’re you.”

Reggie smacks Bobby’s shoulder, “Hey!”

“You telling me I’m wrong?”

Reggie purses his lips, trying to come up with a rebuttal, wrinkling his nose in the process.

Bobby’s gaze tracks over Reggie’s face and he grins. “Exactly.”

Reggie glares at Bobby before his eyes suddenly widen in realization, “Is this why Alex didn’t want us watching them any more?”

Bobby swallows a laugh, “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

Reggie narrows his eyes, “It’s ‘cause of me, isn’t it?”

Bobby averts his gaze, refusing to respond.

“Isn’t it?” Reggie insists, pulling Bobby’s hands off of him. “Not answering just tells me I’m right.”

Bobby sighs with defeat, “Yeah. I think so.”

Reggie huffs as he starts to climb off of Bobby’s lap.

Bobby stops him, grabbing Reggie by the hips. “Hey, no. Come back.”

Reggie looks down at Bobby. “But why?”

“Why what? Why come back or why did we stop with the movies?”

“The second one, obviously.”

“Reg,” Bobby pulls at Reggie, encouraging him to at least sit back down. 

He complies, sitting down next to Bobby. 

Bobby turns to face him, pulling his feet up onto the couch and crossing his legs underneath him. 

Reggie mimics the position. “So?” he encourages once they’re both settled.

Bobby lets out a deep breath, “Reggie, you don’t know how much it sucks to see you so scared. The way it feels to be woken up by your screaming. Knowing all we can do is comfort you after it happens and hope you’re okay.”

Reggie’s face falls. “Oh,” he says simply.

Bobby brings a hand up to cradle Reggie’s face. “We love being there for you. Comforting you. But it still sucks. It was just easier to say no. Or try, anyway. We’re not meaning to baby you. At least… not entirely.”

Reggie rests his hand over Bobby’s, “Yeah, I know. I get that. I hate that my brain loves things that hurt me so much.”

“Hey, that’s why we’re here,” Bobby assures him. “We’d never hurt you on purpose. I never want to hurt you.”

Reggie lifts his gaze up to meet Bobby’s. “You don’t.”

“Good,” Bobby murmurs, leaning closer to Reggie. “Now that that’s sorted, can we do more kissing now?”

“Oh, I see how it is,” Reggie teases. He drops one gentle kiss to Bobby’s lips. “You just want me for my body.”

Bobby hums, letting his hands drift from Reggie’s face, down his arms, and up his back. “Well, we hadn’t gotten there yet but I can’t say that it’s not part of it.”

Reggie rolls his eyes as he lets out a light laugh. 

Bobby grasps Reggie’s hips and pulls him close. He leans back against the arm rest, letting his legs stretch out under them. 

Reggie adjusts to make room for Bobby’s legs, straddling Bobby’s hips. Reggie leans down to kiss him. 

Bobby’s hands travel up Reggie’s back, pulling him down to kiss him back fiercely. 

“I’ll let you choose all the movies forever if this is what we get to do while they’re playing,” Bobby murmurs. 

“I’ll hold you to that,” Reggie counters cheekily. He presses his lips to Bobby’s: once, twice, three times. 

Bobby all but growls as he pulls Reggie back down to kiss him properly, finally letting themselves get lost in each other. 

[old-long-john]

I having a real Sam brain takeover in the last 30 or so hours, just with everything, and the song about Louis is making me so excited for what he and Jacob could do in the next season, so:

What are your favorite acting moments from Sam and Jacob in the show? Could be from just the second season or from both seasons, up to you (I'm curious about your favorite acting moments from other people too, the whole cast is great, but that feels like too big a question lol)

GOD OK SO

I've had 3 insane days of iwtv and Raleigh Ritchie madness and I'm so tired right now, but I want to answer this finally! I know whichever moments I choose I'll hit post and then suddenly remember 10 others that I should've included, but what a gift to have actors who are that talented.

I'll try to keep it to top 3 moments for each of them, over both seasons, under the cut because I witter:

For Sam:

The story of his turning by Magnus. I think Sam's just extraordinary in that scene. The layers of performance, the fact that Lestat is giving them both something raw and real, the fact that you can see that it’s not a relief, it carves a piece out of him to say it out loud, the fact that you can see the moment he puts the wall back up again when he says 'but I have a capacity for enduring', the fact that he does use it as an opportunity to disarm Louis and to try to excuse the inexcusible ('it's why I don't particularly like being abandoned'). It's just such a stand out moment from the version of Lestat we see in most of S1. And also Sam said that he put in the line 'I didn't want this', because he thought it was important that the audience heard him say that, and I think it's vital to the scene working as completely as it does.

From S2 it has to be the moment in the trial when he finally takes accountability for what he did by dropping Louis from the sky. Every second of that speech is just perfection. And the expression on his face when he's poured his heart out and finally said that he's sorry and Louis just looks away, because there can't be forgiveness for that, not ever but especially not in that moment, just wrecks me. He fucked everything up so badly and I think Sam shows us that he's really truly beginning to reckon with that and with the awful consequences of his being a shitty maker and husband. Reckoning with being a shitty father unfortunately doesn’t come until far too late.

I'm trying to go for something less obvious than the reunion scene, which I love so much. I think maybe my 3rd favourite Sam acting moment is the two performances cut together between the trial and the retold version of Claudia's turning. The subtle horror of it, the way he seemed genuinely unnerved by Louis' mania, the regret on his face as he's recalling it, the regret on his face before he's even done it, the way he's still oscillating between performance and true feeling in the telling, the moment of insane dark comedy when he says 'and you have to drain her first Louis'. That scene was honestly the most shocking part of ep 7 for me.

(also, the 'tickets please' scene because jesus christ)

For Jacob:

I mean it's the whole show, really. He's just transcendent. But one moment that I really love, just for the extreme contrast it shows between past and present Louis, is when early in S1 he pushes back against Daniel's (fair!) point about his total rewrite of the way he talks about Lestat by reading from Daniel's autobiography. He's so otherworldly and alien in that moment, so detached from humanity somehow in his mannerisms when he picks up the book and leafs through it for the right page. And then flexing his powers by setting the tapes on fire in the bin. He's at his most cooly vampiric because Daniel's picking at a real emotional vulnerability, and the way Jacob plays it is so fascinating to watch.

In S2 I LOVE when Louis gets nasty. Especially when he makes Daniel tell him what Alice said when he finally asked her to marry him. What Lestat said during the trial was kinda true: 'Louis was deceptively agile with words. A trenchant form of verbal amusement.' That man knows how to slit someone open with just the right turn of phrase and I love to see him do it. The glee in his eyes when Louis laughs at Daniel saying 'she said no' is just everything. Like, my god dude, I know he was asking for it but jesus. I also just love that Jacob was scared we wouldn't like Louis any more after S2, as if we weren't all gonna love him even more for all his fucked up complexity.

And my 3rd favourite Jacob acting moment is the Loumand fight in 2x05, because holy fucking shit. Everything I said above times a thousand. The 'does he wanna lick my boots' tongue out, the getting right up in Armand's face, the gleeful savagery, the speed with which he crumbles when Armand brings Claudia into it. I think it's one of my favourite performances by any actor in anything ever (and Assad absolutely meets him at the exact same level).

Since you mentioned the others, I'll also say shout out to Delainey for every second she was on screen but especially 'now I know what two blood-fat cocks slapping hands feels like', because I lost my entire fucking mind at the way she delivered that line.

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

I finally saw INSIDE OUT 2 yesterday.

That's probably the longest it has taken me to see a new Pixar movie.

I don't have any memory of whether I saw TOY STORY in the cinema in late 1995/early 1996, but we had the original VHS release from late 1996 and I went as Buzz Lightyear for Halloween that year. If I didn't see TOY STORY in theaters on its initial release, then it took me almost a year to see the movie. Movie came out Thanksgiving 1995, VHS was released right before Halloween 1996. The days when you had to wait a WHILE for a movie to come out on tape.

I eventually saw TOY STORY in theaters, when they re-released it in 3D in fall 2009, ahead of the release of TOY STORY 3.

But I *did* see A BUG'S LIFE in theaters, and so on. Never missed a Pixar since, that was until SOUL, LUCA, and TURNING RED skipped theaters... And then played at theaters not near me earlier this year. I'll get 'em eventually.

So yeah, INSIDE OUT 2 released on June 14th, I saw it yesterday, July 22nd.

And I thought it was a perfectly fine sequel, like most of Pixar's sequels are. I just love revisiting characters and worlds again, and the new story doing something neat and fun with them for a good 90-100min. That's all I needed, really.

I feel TOY STORY 2 is the *one* Pixar sequel that equaled the original, and surpassed it in some ways. Very rarely do sequels do that, really. And I think, in addition to things some folks expect out of Pixar, this is why Pixar sequels tend to be looked at a certain way. But to me, a lot of them have just been comfortably fine movies. Good enough on their own, and solid enough companions to the originals. And I think a lot of that is because the first movies were usually that special, that it's almost unfair the original exists. The new movie has such huge shoes to fill in the eyes of many. I feel like when the original is being made, there's a sort of "all or nothing" attitude behind it. With the sequels, things get more comfortable. "Okay, we made the first one..."

Especially now, since Pixar is no longer a little studio in the Bay Area, and hasn't been since 2006...

So, TOY STORY 2 is still tops for me. And a small clicks under, TOY STORY 3. Then INCREDIBLES 2, not too far behind. I actually legit love INCREDIBLES 2, even if I think its third act setpiece is a little rushed and the resolution a bit lacking. The rest of it, to me, is totally spot-on and just so well-made. Even the big twist that there's no shadowy mind control guy as the main antagonist. It's still a Brad Bird movie through and through, and he's largely in his groove here. That puts it very high in my book.

Next click down would be this movie, and MONSTERS UNIVERSITY. INSIDE OUT 2, plot-wise, is solid and clever. I like that it's small scale like the first movie is: About three or so days of following Riley through an exciting, if not anxiety-stoking time in her life. First movie, she moves out of state. Second movie, leveling up in her sport and meeting new people once more. It does feel like it's retreading a lot of the first movie's major beats without some of the punch (which I think plagues a few of these Pixar sequels), but I do think its 3rd act panic attack does land. Really, the first INSIDE OUT had Bing Bong. This doesn't have anything like that subplot. There was enough really fun and creative stuff here (Bloofy, Pouchey and Lance were the MVPs), I really liked the four new emotions, and its best moments sit right alongside the original... I almost consider MU truly great, the final third in the camp cabin almost puts it over for me. The rest of the movie, I think, quite works as well. Gets progressively better as the Scare Games commence. The early stuff up until Mike and Sulley get dropped from the scare program is just fine to me. Like INSIDE OUT 2, we're in the perfectly fine territory with this one. It's always a very satisfactory watch for me. Both films sometimes rise a little above that and have their moments that I find truly fantastic.

Underneath are CARS 3 and LIGHTYEAR.

I guess my only major issues with CARS 3 are that the pacing is weird to me in the first third, particularly how they handle McQueen's post-crash depression. Once they start really traveling in that movie, like to the Thunder Hollow and Thomasville racetracks, that's when it really gets into gear for me. When it really leans into the Cruz stuff. I still think it sidelines most of the Radiator Springs gang, though, much like CARS 2 did. If they make a fourth movie, I'd like to see them appear more. That ensembles helps make the first one so good to me.

LIGHTYEAR I've already defended multiple times on here. I really like it as an old-school space adventure movie, and I particularly appreciated the themes of ego, legacy, and doing better by your past mistakes. Of all the 2020s Pixar movies, it feels like it's from the Lasseter era. Kinda old school. I just don't think it's spectacular or anything, doesn't really go as hard as it should, but it's a very solid sci-fi treat nonetheless. I think it would've fared better had it been an original movie, and not a Buzz Lightyear story.

Then a click below those two, for me, are FINDING DORY and TOY STORY 4. These are both firmly of the 2010s Pixar in my opinion, very much of the Lasseter in complete control era. The "legacy"/"nostalgia"-heavy era. And it makes sense, TOY STORY and FINDING NEMO hail from the classic period when it was largely "Team TOY STORY" calling the shots. John Lasseter and Andrew Stanton. There's fantastic stuff in both of these movies that I really love and admire, and I think they're overall satisfying and good. FINDING DORY in particular hit close to home as an autistic person... but I also feel like they are very, very overplotted and busy. I know the low-hanging fruit is stuff like, say, how TOY STORY 4 ended. I didn't have a problem with that, I actually found the ending with Woody going off with Bo to be a good - albeit risky - choice. No, my main issue is that this is where it starts to feel like the needle had gotten stuck for the studio. Like, "This IS a Pixar movie". It's gotta have the big cries, the big goodbyes, the big emotional moment, the plot has to have a lot going on. They gotta be here while this is here, and vice versa. They have few moments where they can just breathe a bit, or when they do, then it's WHOOSH onto the next thing. TOY STORY 4 does, however, have that long quiet stretch with Forky and Woody on the road. Good stuff. The reprising of certain moments, particularly in DORY's case, feel like "Greatest Hits" (to paraphrase someone else), and I don't think DORY's 3rd act grand theft truck sequence really works well. So, it's all just a matter of me thinking there's too much complication in these 100min stories. Too much plot crammed into them. Floyd Norman himself put it best when describing animated movies in the early 2010s, that the films with "hopelessly overworked plots and convoluted structure" were trying too hard to "convince" the audience rather than "entertain" them.

Then last but not least. Bottom ring. CARS 2.

With everything that movie has going against it... The jam-packed plot, Mater being confused as a spy being largely unbelievable (Finn McMissile and Holly Shiftwell aren't very bright, it seems), McQueen and Radiator Springs largely pushed aside, and the weird stuff with the lemons - cars that break down, that universe's disabled people almost - turning their collective plight into corporate villainy... I don't dislike it! I think there's a really good international race/spy action movie buried in here, and I'm aware that the movie was originally meant to be a summer 2012 release and then it got bumped up to summer 2011... Maybe it needed that one extra year to coalesce into something solid? But, yeah, I still think it's beautifully-realized, full of visual candy, and great action even. That opening setpiece on the oil rig slaps, I say. Pixar could've had a really solid James Bond-style movie here.

CARS 3 seems to imply that everything that happened in CARS 2 was all a dream. Even Larry the Cable Guy himself, Mater's voice, seemed to imply that not too long ago...

I had a weird thought recently... What if they took the existing movie, and re-framed it as a Mater's Tall Tale? The movie is very much informed by those CARS TOONS shorts that Pixar started making in 2008, where Mater made up some big fib about having various careers. Those worked because they were presented as silly fantasies, conjured up by a goofy old dingus. CARS 2 comes close to being that, there's a bit in the end where Van (the lost minivan traveler husband from the first movie) doubts everything Mater told them, but then jet Holly shows up. I think CARS 2 could've landed if they did some PRINCESS BRIDE thing where Mater's telling the tale back to someone, maybe Lightning, and being doubted every step of the way. Like he's making it all up on the spot, like the movie itself seemed to be doing. He did that in the shorts, "Yeah, Lightnin', you was there too!"

It's a massive mess, a car wreck you could say... but I still enjoy most of it. I bought the Blu-ray back in the day, even. It was one of those 2-discers that had LOTS of bonus features on it.

So on the whole, I like the Pixar sequels, even if they may not always match the originals. But I think that's just true of a lot of sequels to movies considered among the greats, or very high on folks' lists. Not all of them can be GODFATHER PART IIs or EMPIRE STRIKES BACKs. TOY STORY 2, for me, is the Pixar sequel that's the equivalent of that. I'm totally okay with the other ones not being that... So long as I still really like them and took something home with me from them... Yeah, that's what matters to me most.

[kitmon]

Hello! How did you imagine the first meeting between Eddie and the reader in the Let’s Dance universe? Did he crush start then or develop during the course of middle school? Also, I would be very excited if it became a multi-chapter fic! I absolutely love a good slow burn and your writing is wonderful :)

EEeeeeee! I love that you love the idea of a multi-chapter fic! I might start adding to it as soon as I'm through with finals! And it'll be perfect because it's winter time and it fits the vibes so well!

(Also, I am so sorry anon, I hope you see this even though it took me so long!)

The way I see it playing out is that they knew each other all throughout their baby years in the way that every kid in a small town knows each other. I don't think Eddie was always the reject and that may be controversial lol but I just don't think that kindergarten children are as cruel to each other in the way that older adolescents and adults are. They aren't really mean to each other for superficial stuff like what you wear or what you're interested in. I dunno that's just my perception of young kids; they're mean in like the way that they'll steal your crayons or something and when they do comment on your clothes or appearance, it's often because they don't understand and less because they're trying to make you feel bad.

All that to say, I think that Eddie and reader would have been the kind of childhood friends that weren't, like, attached at the hip but were most often, especially in Kindergarten, found together, playing house, coloring and sharing markers, all that cute kid stuff. They just got along very well and found comfort in each others' company. I imagine, during free time, they would cuddle up together on a bean bag, pop one of those cassette tape audio books into a cassette player and listen to A Wizard Of Earthsea. And as they listen, probably making a note on the story every once in a while, they doze off like sleepy puppies, stubby fingers grazing each others' as they huddle in close together. Literally so cute T-T.

But then, after a while, I figure they kind of disperse and find themselves different friend groups as their interests develop. I don't think it wasn't because either one disliked what the other did but just because they found others that better suited their personalities at the time. That eventually fell away from your memory.

Now, middle school is where things get juicy; Eddie's more alienated from the community for his interests and you're gaining popularity for your academic success and friendly demeanor. Often, Eddie was bullied or purposefully excluded from things but you never treated him like that, in fact, that's the reason he grew such a soft spot for you. It started out small like most crushes do, seeing you in the halls and thinking you were pretty, but he fell hard when you stood up for him when no one else would.

Tommy H. was always a bully, raised a bully, stayed a bully, and he loved tormenting Eddie, shoving him against lockers, beating him up behind the dumpster and ransacking his bag and pockets. A regular occurrence was Tommy smacking Eddie's textbooks and notes down onto the floor as he passed him in the halls and, as you saw him do it you shouted after him but he was already turning the corner and ignoring you entirely.

You scoffed and rushed towards Eddie, crouching down to help him gather his belongings, attempting to keep all of your fingers from being crushed under the negligent shoes of students who maneuvered around you and Eddie like fish in a stream, disregarding the both of you as they made their way to their next class.

"He's such an asshole" you mumble, swiping up the lined note sheets and sketchpad papers from the floor, trying to salvage the crumpled and stamped over documents by rubbing your thumb over the shoe marks which was ultimately useless.

That's when Eddie notices you so close, lifting his head to find you gathering his D&D notes and character sketches, flushing at the sight of you in your darling sundress and scraggly wool cardigan, he can hardly believe such a nasty word left such a beautiful creature. He freezes, eyes going wide as he watches you try to tap the papers into a neat stack before he blinks and remembers to respond.

"Yuh-yeah."

You stand and admire his drawings, smiling at a doodle of what appears to be an elf, decorated in ornate robes with luscious flowing hair, wielding a large sword. As Eddie stands too, you hand him over his papers and notebooks.

"Are you okay?" You ask as he takes the pile.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he nods, not ever fully making eye contact with you. "It's not a big deal."

"It's a huge deal!" You correct, voice raising a bit. "He shouldn't be messing with you like that!"

Eddie doesn't say anything, only stares at his feet and shuffles under your intense gaze. You sigh through your nose and place your fingers over his shoulder.

"You know, I don't think anyone would fault you for throwing a punch every once in a while," you suggest.

Eddie lifts his head and looks you in the eye, only for a brief second, nodding.

The late bell rings a shrill sound and it startles you away from Eddie and, as soon as it's gone, he misses the touch of your hand.

"Oh! Crap!" You barely notice that the halls are all but empty save for you and Eddie. "I've gotta go!"

You start to back away but press your fingers against his chest to remind him you hardly want to separate.

"But we should hang out!" You rush out, eyes wide. Eddie finds that he can say nothing, words lodged in his throat, and only chokes before nodding. You smile a wide, radiant smile before starting to jog down the hall, and as you've already turned the corner, you shout, "I like your hair!"

Eddie smiles and runs his palm over the sheared locks before turning and heading to his own class, a wild blush painting his pale cheeks.

[emmym1]

My thoughts on... Black Widow 2020 (#1-5) "The Ties That Bind"

So after finishing the incredible 50 issue run of Captain Marvel by Kelly Thompson I decided to start reading Black Widow (2020) which also happens to be written by her! I was super excited to read it because Black Widow is one of my favorite characters in the MCU, and while I had casually read some of her comics a few years ago I never really was able to delve into everything the character had to offer in the comics. So it was super excited I now have that chance! And I have to say it absolutely blew my mind how amazing these first 5 issues were, all of my expectations were exceeded.

This run started off amazing and immediatly grabs your attention within the first three pages with its amazing art and visualisation of action sequences. It was actually incredibly how fluid and smooth the action in this. It was drawn in such a way that you could easily understand the flow of the action while also seeing every single detail of it. The art in general in this is absolutely fantastic in everyway. I was really intrigued by the setup of this first arc. Black Widow getting taken out only to reappear as a super happy mother in a perfect family. I was really curious to see as to what actually happened. And as the story progresses you get more and more Truman Show vibes. I think it was a really great pick to have Arcade be the mastermind behind it as this type of thing was completely up his alley. I loved Clint's and Bucky's involvement in this as well. Them trying to figure out what is going on with Nat and not being sure whether they should pull her out of this or not. It's really bittersweet in a way, as they realize it is too good to be true for Nat but still hesitating to pull her out as she seems genuinely happy and at peace. It's kind of tragic too as I imagine she hasn't had much peace or chances to just live life and be happy, and now that she has that chance she gets forced to leave it all behind. Her slowly remembering her old self and then remembering who she was was so well done. The way she slowly took upon her old spy habbits was great. In general they did an amazing job at showing how much her being a spy affects her mind, how she percieves things and how she stands in her daily life. Little things like putting tape on the door so she would know when someone was waiting on her, stuff like that really did a lot for her characterization and showing how much being a spy influences her daily life. The moment she realizes everything and is back to her old self was kind of heartbreaking in a way. As she knew from that point on that she wouldn't have the chance anymore at a peaceful and blissful live with her husband and kid. Even worse, that she would have to break all ties with them so they would be safe and wouldn't get caught up in her troubles. It must've been such a painful moment for Nat, because you see that she genuinely cares for them and genuinely wants a normal life with them. But she just can't. And it's super heartbreaking because you know it really hurts her that she can't have that. The final few issues of this arc were defintely the most emotional and admittedly made me tear up a bit. Them trying their best to bring Nat's husband and kid to safety. And just as she checks up on them and turns her back they get blown up by the people behind this entire mess. That moment was incredibly emotional and heartbreaking, especially due to how good the art was during it. Nat crying as you see her face through the fire, realizing what just happened, and why it was right of her to force them to break all connections with her. It's very painful. I'd imagine that in the back of her mind there was a small part that was convinced that they could make it work somehow and they she could have her happy life with them. And now she gets the ultimate proof that she can't, no matter how much she wants it.

The reveal afterwards that it was a fakeout and that in reality her husband and kid were safe somewhere else on the planet was really shocking. Because it completely recontectualizes the scene where they get "blown up" and Nat cries. One could say she was just acting so everyone would be deceived and convinced of what happened. But I feel like those were genuine tears because like I said she gets the ultimate proof that she can't have a normal and happy life with them. But furthermore, from that point on they're basically "dead" in Nat's eyes. She can't ever see them again, no matter how much she wants it. She'll never know whether they'll be happy and never will get to see her kid grow up and that must be absolutely heartbreaking to realize. And that's what I think she started to realize as the plan was set in motion and the explosion happened. Her happy, perfect family is gone forever and even though they're still out there, she can't ever see or reach them. It's incredible tragic. But the moment that really hit me was this piece of dialogue she has with Bucky afterwards, who was the only one in on the plan: "There's an ache in me I've never felt before. In all the things I have been through... the highs and lows... the peaks of joy and the depths of sorrow...all pain and regret...nothing has felt as empty as this ache. It feels like and endless hole. And I cannot imagine how something so dark and endlees and empty could ever be filled." Seeing her say this and breakdown into bucky's arms on the floor was incredibly emotional and heartbreaking. It really made me tear up because you realize how tragic all of this is. And it only gets proven further in the last few pages of issue 5 as you see both Nat and then her husband and kid sit at the front of their houses each in a different part of the world as Nat talks about finding peace and happiness thinking about how she might be watching the same sunset as them. It's such an emotional page. This first arc just completely sold me on this run. I was left feeling absolutely speechless and emotional after finishing this arc. It really shows how tragic Nat as a character is and how bittersweet her life is. The trajectory of her life is such a tragic one but yet she manages to always push through and be better, even now when she basically lost her entire newfound family that she was genuinely at happy and at peace with. But still she pushes through and wants to be better because of them. And that's what really makes this character so interesting to me. She's been through so much, suffered so much and yet she still stands strong even though it's not always easy and even though she'll never have the normal life she might dream of. She does the best she can given her circumstances and knows who she is and what she can do, but also the things she isn't and can never have. I'm so happy I decided to start reading this run. I'm completely hooked and this first arc just left me feeling speechless and emotional. The art and writing of this run is just absolutly incredibly, every action moment is perfectly visualized and the writing just really sells her as this incredibly spy that can't get topped by anyone while also being a really vunreable person deep down. The last few issues were just incredible and I can't wait to see how Nat will evolve from this. Will she be able to become better for them as she promised or will she give in and take revenge for what she lost? It's going to be really interesting to see where they'll take the story from here. And I for one can't wait to read it!

[bnha-more-like-bnh-gay]

Rarepair headcanons because I am ignoring my problems

Serodeku:

Izuku reenacts the Spider-Man movies with Sero. Izuku is MJ. They also alternate being Spider-Man sometimes

They skate together

They get very protective when people call their boyfriend “plain”

They play dnd together

Sero tries to make sure that izuku gets some rest

They’re both kinda insecure, izuku more than sero, but still; and they make sure to reassure each other as often as possible

Sero likes listening to Izuku’s ramblings and finds them cute. He has told izuku this, only for the poor boy to imitate a tomato

After Izuku has been particularly reckless, Sero takes advantage of his quirk, wraps Izuku in bubble wrap, and tapes it there

Tokodeku:

Jocknerd bf and goth bf, we love to see it

Tokoyami teaches izuku how to sword fight

They start a dnd club at U.A.

Izuku talks to dark shadow a lot, Dark Shadow approves of him, and has claimed the spot of best man at their wedding

Izuku comes up with ideas to help Tokoyami gain control with Dark Shadow

Dark Shadow is very protective over Izuku, no matter how many times Tokoyami tells him that he can take care of himself, Dark Shadow will put himself between Izuku and any form of danger as often as possible

Dekoyama??? Aoyama/izuku:

Aoyama gives him makeovers, obviously

Aoyama drags izuku to the mall and tries to revamp some of his wardrobe, but he actually finds the “pants” and “flannel” type shirts cute

They help each other train their quirks

Aoyama is trilingual, and teaching izuku English and French.

Izuku always brings Aoyama home some new cheese

Y’all, I love them so much. There needs to be more aodeku content

Monoshinsou:

They have people watching dates. They come up with stories for the people they’re watching; their job, family, background, etc.

They judge people together

They call each other “love”

They’re both dramatic bastards, who will flop onto their lovers lap and proclaim their death due to a minor inconvenience

They jokingly sh*t-talk class A

Shinsou said “I love you” first, and it was because Monoma brought him coffee to class

Monoyama:

Like monoshinsou, they’re both dramatic bastards, who will flop onto their lovers lap and proclaim their death due to a minor inconvenience

They go shopping together and pick out the most dramatic pieces of clothing for each other

I love them so much, please 😭✋

They have tea parties every week, where they sh*t talk everyone else and gossip

They are both fancy bastards, and they wear the most exquisite outfits to go grocery shopping, and the outshine everyone

They both actually make clothing, they’ll go fabric shopping together. Gift exchanges are often articles of clothing that they’ve made for each other

Momomei:

They work on gear together!!!

Momo makes sure that mei gets some sleep

Mei helps redesign momo’s suit

They often work together with izuku to work in gear and such

They actually got together after izuku introduced them. He had been working on gear with mei, and studying with momo and he thought they’d hit it off. He was correct

Shintsuyu:

Dude they’d be so cute

Tsu is a vent gremlin, and you can’t change my mind. So she and shinsou will play a game where they try to find each other. Tsu is in the vent and shinsou is in the classrooms. Shinsou will try to find whichever vent she’s in, or she’ll find whichever classroom he’s in, in 20 minutes or less

I always headcanoned tsu as a dog person, so they’d have two cats and two dogs, and a bunny that they named Deku

They like comparing their friends to animals, hence the bunny, Deku

Kamideku:

Kaminari is a flirt, and izuku does n o t know how to handle it

Kaminari likes listening to izuku’s ramblings, and can keep up with them. He’ll ask questions on things too, and Izuku has never felt more appreciated

I don’t know why I feel like they’d have so many animals, but I do. They’d have so many, man. Three cats, two dogs, four sugar gliders, a hamster

Adhd power couple. They hyperfixated on complimentary things at the same time one time

Kaminari tutors izuku in English, and izuku turots kami in some other subjects. He’s also teaching kami JSL on the side. Kaminari has a live of languages

Momochako:

Study dates, Momo asks ochako to quiz her a lot

Ochako takes to floating momo’s things when she wants attention. Especially when Momo is studying. She makes a game out of how many things she can float until the other girl notices

Uraraka’s confidence does wonders for momo’s. Uraraka always makes sure to reassure momo that she is strong and that she can do this

Momo makes Uraraka whatever her heart desires. Uraraka blushes all the time, and momo takes great pride in getting her girlfriend to blush

Minatoru:

Mina clings to everyone, but especially to toru

They give each other stuffed animals so often. They’ll go to the store to get food, and come back with three stuffed animals that reminded them of each other

Please, they’re so cute 😭✋

They will play hide and seek, I stand by this.

Mina helps toru design a new costume. I hate hers, it’s horrible, and sexist, and not suitable for a fucking child

Toru says that pink is her favorite color

They flirt with each other all the time. Half the class thinks it’s cute, half of them used to think it was cute.

Iidamomo:

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, but study dates. they quiz each other, and it actually gets pretty competitive

They also have rage room dates. I will not budge on this. Iida tried to murder someone, and I am excited to see momo finally snap. She deserves it

They alternate paying for dates, don’t try me.

The go hiking a lot

They started liking each other after one late night, both having nightmares. Momo had tea, and offered some to Iida. They talked until the early hours of the morning

They can’t flirt. They try. But they’re horrible at it. They’ll compliment each other all day long, but they cannot flirt.

KIRIDEKU, MY BELOVED:

Y’all,,, y’all, I love them so much

They train together, obviously

They ran into each other one night in the common room after both having nightmares. They talked about middle school, how they were both bullied, izuku’s quirk coming in late, katsuki being abusive, kiri being bullied because his quirk wasn’t “cool.” After that, they were practically inseparable.

They started going on dates, not that either of them knew they were dates. The entire class knew, so did the teachers, so did the rest of U.A. Kirishima picked up on it first after a comment from Mina, he had is realization.

So, he started courting Izuku. Not thag izuku realized this. He brought him flowers on most ‘dates,’ he bought him hero action figures whenever he could, he complimented him until Izuku was red in the face (which was honestly very easy.) Still, izuku remained ignorant to the fact that he was indeed dating Kirishima.

The final tipping point, was due to Uraraka’s help. She was quite tired of watching the two of them pine for each other. It was amusing for the first couple months, watching Kirishima try so hard, and Deku being totally oblivious. However, she took pity on her friends after a while.

So, Uraraka devised a devilish plan to get the two together. She involved Mina, Sero, and kaminari in this plan. What was the plan, you ask? Oh, simply to trap the two in one room until they broke through izuku’s obliviousness.

Kirishima finally “straight” up admitted his feelings, to which Izuku had the sudden realization of “oh my gods, have we been dating this whole time??” Yes, Izuku. Yes you have.

They have two anniversaries after that.

Let’s be honest, they are really, annoyingly, horrifically lovey dovey. Kirishima brags about having “the manliest and bestest boyfriend in the world.” Izuku flaunts his many PowerPoint presentations on how talented and incredible Kirishima is

Uraraka doesn’t know if she did the right thing by helping them. She is so tired

Tsujirou:

Jirou makes playlists for tsu

The few sane ones in class A, I swear

They go on walks in the rain as often as they can

They go for dates in the bookstore too. They each pick out an album and a book for the other to listen to and read

Y’all, they make so much sense togetherrrrr, I’m love them 🥺

Jirou started liking tsu after the crew saved bakugou. Jirou sat with tsu after momo, Iida, kirishima, Todoroki, and izuku apologized and sat with her. They had movie night, and Jirou joined the Bakugou saving crew and tsu with taking well into the night. She just appreciated how much tsu cared

Tsu started liking Jirou after she helped Iida, momo, and izuku try to keep the class in order. She appreciated how diplomatic and calm she was

Jirou would talk to izuku all night long about how gay she was, and how adorable tsu was. So, izuku decided to try and suggest ways for Jirou to ask her out.

She did not end up getting to ask her out though, as Tsu walked up to her the next morning f and asked if she wanted to go on a date. Jirou said yes. Izuku cried

Izujirou:

They make playlists for each other

They go for runs on the beach a lot

They both have insomnia, and often spend time making blanket forts and talking, or FaceTiming and listening to music

Jirou walks into the common room once a week looking for new music. She started liking Izuku after he made a playlist for her for one of these occasions.

They’re both quite awkward when it comes to romance, but neither of them will shy away from facing the truth. So, Jirou made izuku a playlist filled with love songs that reminded her of him and sent it to him. Sadly, izuku is dense as hell.

So, then Jirou wrote a love song and told izuku that the song was for him. Sadly, izuku is dense as hell.

So, then Jirou write analysis about izuku’s quirk for him. Sadly, izuku is dense as hell

So, then, after thinking that Jirou had done so much for him, izuku made her a playlist filled with love songs. Jirou took this to mean that izuku had finally picked up on her feelings, and accepted them.

So, they started to go on dates. Not that izuku knew this, as he is dense as hell. All leading up to izuku finally confessing his feelings on one of their ‘dates,’ to which Jirou responded, “dude, we’re already dating? Aren’t we? I- I thought that was obvious??”

May this awkward couple be forever blessed

Tokoyama:

Goth/prep boyfriends, we love to see it

At least once a day, Aoyama will proclaim that Tokoyami “shines almost as bright as he does, in his fabulous emo way”

They sword fight, and come up with really dramatic scenarios and scenes that they’re in

They bond over being in the izucrew and their shared love of swords. Aoyama took fencing classes in middle school, and Tokoyami got into sword fighting after watching it in pirates of the Caribbean as a young child. He is self taught and watched countless videos on the art of sword fighting

Tokoyami asked Aoyama our by dramatically presenting him with a dagger and going “will you accompany me on a formal outing as my lover?”

Shinyama:

They flirt constantly

No really, it’s getting quite annoying. Someone please stop them.

They both plop down in random areas and proclaim their deaths, the difference between them, is that Aoyama will burst into shinsou’s room, and yell “love, I’ve been murdered. Mourn for me” while plopping down on shinsou’s lap. Shinsou can be found laying face down outside aoyama’s door, and when Aoyama goes to open the door, he just goes “I’ve been murdered.”

^^ one time, shinsou did a very fun Halloween prank for this, where he poured fake blood all over himself for Aoyama to find him an hour later, asleep.

Nap dates. Aoyama get glitter all over shinsou’s room

Iiyama:

Aoyama enjoys making Iida blush, obviously. But he takes joy in doing it specifically when class is about to start. Aizawa is tired of his shit

Here is how I think an iiyama conversation might go:

Aoyama: I ask for one thing in this relationship-

Iida: Aoyama, you know that’s a lie-

Aoyama: for my boyfriend to carry me around all day-

Iida: Aoyama, I cannot feasibly do this with class-

Aoyama: and I don’t think that’s too much to ask for 😤

Anyway, Aoyama got carried around all day that day, despite Iida’s blush and Aizawa’s eye twitch

Everyone in the izucrew is close, but Iida and Aoyama started to get close after Iida told the crew about Stain. Aoyama wanted Iida to know that he wasn’t alone, and that he wanted to help him. So he started packing extra cheese for lunch and giving it to Iida. Iida was very confused at first. But this was Aoyama trying to court him. This was only made apparent by momo and Jirou telling Iida that this was aoyama’s attempt at expressing romantic interest.

Aoyama flirts with everyone, that’s just who he is. But with Iida? Oh it was tenfold. The poor boy was red in the face constantly. Aoyama was a persistent little bugger too, following him around and calling him ‘mon amour’

Kirikamideku:

My dearest traffic light trio, I’m love them

They train together, and kiri and kami always appreciate izuku’s analysis snd ideas

Kiri falls even more in love with izuku and kaminari when they go off on rants. Izuku rants and kami can keep up with him so he asks questions about it. Kiri loves to watch his boyfriends go on rants, I don’t make the rules, but I do enforce them

They started to get closer after kami and kiri found bakugou causing a ptsd flashback (could be on purpose of an accident, up to the reader.) they stated with him and tried to talk him through it. After this, izuku started to tell them about having been a “late bloomer” and being bullied, etc. (I don’t know, man; I tend to over share after flashbacks and after panic attacks)

Izuku tutors them in several subjects, but kami tutors them in English. Kiri just falls in love with his smart boyfriends

Izuku is teaching kami JSL and kami is helping izuku with English and Italian (personal headcanon that Italian has been one of kami’s special interests) kiri loves to listen to them, and finds it relaxing and calming to hear them do this. When he has panic attacks, he’ll ask them to tutor each other in different languages

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

“Elliot Page doesn’t remember exactly how long he had been asking.

But he does remember the acute feeling of triumph when, around age 9, he was finally allowed to cut his hair short. “I felt like a boy,” Page says. “I wanted to be a boy. I would ask my mom if I could be someday.” Growing up in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Page visualized himself as a boy in imaginary games, freed from the discomfort of how other people saw him: as a girl. After the haircut, strangers finally started perceiving him the way he saw himself, and it felt both right and exciting.

The joy was short-lived. Months later, Page got his first break, landing a part as a daughter in a Canadian mining family in the TV movie Pit Pony. He wore a wig for the film, and when Pit Pony became a TV show, he grew his hair out again. “I became a professional actor at the age of 10,” Page says. And pursuing that passion came with a difficult compromise. “Of course I had to look a certain way.”

We are speaking in late February. It is the first interview Page, 34, has given since disclosing in December that he is transgender, in a heartfelt letter posted to Instagram, and he is crying before I have even uttered a question. “Sorry, I’m going to be emotional, but that’s cool, right?” he says, smiling through his tears.

It’s hard for him to talk about the days that led up to that disclosure. When I ask how he was feeling, he looks away, his neck exposed by a new short haircut. After a pause, he presses his hand to his heart and closes his eyes. “This feeling of true excitement and deep gratitude to have made it to this point in my life,” he says, “mixed with a lot of fear and anxiety.”

It’s not hard to understand why a trans person would be dealing with conflicting feelings in this moment. Increased social acceptance has led to more young people describing themselves as trans—1.8% of Gen Z compared with 0.2% of boomers, according to a recent Gallup poll—yet this has fueled conservatives who are stoking fears about a “transgender craze.” President Joe Biden has restored the right of transgender military members to serve openly, and in Hollywood, trans people have never had more meaningful time onscreen. Meanwhile, J.K. Rowling is leveraging her cultural capital to oppose transgender equality in the name of feminism, and lawmakers are arguing in the halls of Congress over the validity of gender identities. “Sex has become a political football in the culture wars,” says Chase Strangio, deputy director for transgender justice at the ACLU.

(Full article with photos continued under the “read more”)

And so Page—who charmed America as a precocious pregnant teenager in Juno, constructed dreamscapes in Inception and now stars in Netflix’s hit superhero show The Umbrella Academy, the third season of which he’s filming in Toronto—expected that his news would be met with both applause and vitriol. “What I was anticipating was a lot of support and love and a massive amount of hatred and transphobia,” says Page. “That’s essentially what happened.” What he did not anticipate was just how big this story would be. Page’s announcement, which made him one of the most famous out trans people in the world, started trending on Twitter in more than 20 countries. He gained more than 400,000 new followers on Instagram on that day alone. Thousands of articles were published. Likes and shares reached the millions. Right-wing podcasters readied their rhetoric about “women in men’s locker rooms.” Casting directors reached out to Page’s manager saying it would be an honor to cast Page in their next big movie.

So, it was a lot. Over the course of two conversations, Page will say that understanding himself in all the specifics remains a work in progress. Fathoming one’s gender, an identity innate and performed, personal and social, fixed and evolving, is complicated enough without being under a spotlight that never seems to turn off. But having arrived at a critical juncture, Page feels a deep sense of responsibility to share his truth. “Extremely influential people are spreading these myths and damaging rhetoric—every day you’re seeing our existence debated,” Page says. “Transgender people are so very real.”

That role in Pit Pony led to other productions and eventually, when Page was 16, to a film called Mouth to Mouth. Playing a young anarchist, Page had a chance to cut his hair again. This time, he shaved it off completely. The kids at his high school teased him, but in photos he has posted from that time on social media he looks at ease. Page’s head was still shaved when he mailed in an audition tape for the 2005 thriller Hard Candy. The people in charge of casting asked him to audition again in a wig. Soon, the hair was back.

Page’s tour de force performance in Hard Candy led, two years later, to Juno, a low-budget indie film that brought Page Oscar, BAFTA and Golden Globe nominations and sudden megafame. The actor, then 21, struggled with the stresses of that ascension. The endless primping, red carpets and magazine spreads were all agonizing reminders of the disconnect between how the world saw Page and who he knew himself to be. “I just never recognized myself,” Page says. “For a long time I could not even look at a photo of myself.” It was difficult to watch the movies too, especially ones in which he played more feminine roles.

Page loved making movies, but he also felt alienated by Hollywood and its standards. Alia Shawkat, a close friend and co-star in 2009’s Whip It,describes all the attention from Juno as scarring. “He had a really hard time with the press and expectations,” Shawkat says. “‘Put this on! And look this way! And this is sexy!’”

By the time he appeared in blockbusters like X-Men: The Last Stand and Inception, Page was suffering from depression, anxiety and panic attacks. He didn’t know, he says, “how to explain to people that even though [I was] an actor, just putting on a T-shirt cut for a woman would make me so unwell.” Shawkat recalls Page’s struggles with clothes. “I’d be like, ‘Hey, look at all these nice outfits you’re getting,’ and he would say, ‘It’s not me. It feels like a costume,’” she says. Page tried to convince himself that he was fine, that someone who was fortunate enough to have made it shouldn’t have complaints. But he felt exhausted by the work required to “just exist,” and thought more than once about quitting acting.

In 2014, Page came out as gay, despite feeling for years that “being out was impossible” given his career. (Gender identity and sexual orientation are, of course, distinct, but one queer identity can coexist with another.) In an emotional speech at a Human Rights Campaign conference, Page talked about being part of an industry “that places crushing standards” on actors and viewers alike. “There are pervasive stereotypes about masculinity and femininity that define how we’re all supposed to act, dress and speak,” Page went on. “And they serve no one.”

The actor started wearing suits on the red carpet. He found love, marrying choreographer Emma Portner in 2018. He asserted more agency in his career, producing his own films with LGBTQ leads like Freeheld and My Days of Mercy. And he made a masculine wardrobe a condition of taking roles. Yet the daily discord was becoming unbearable. “The difference in how I felt before coming out as gay to after was massive,” says Page. “But did the discomfort in my body ever go away? No, no, no, no.”

In part, it was the isolation forced by the pandemic that brought to a head Page’s wrestling with gender. (Page and Portner separated last summer, and the two divorced in early 2021. “We’ve remained close friends,” Page says.) “I had a lot of time on my own to really focus on things that I think, in so many ways, unconsciously, I was avoiding,” he says. He was inspired by trailblazing trans icons like Janet Mock and Laverne Cox, who found success in Hollywood while living authentically. Trans writers helped him understand his feelings; Page saw himself reflected in P. Carl’s memoir Becoming a Man. Eventually “shame and discomfort” gave way to revelation. “I was finally able to embrace being transgender,” Page says, “and letting myself fully become who I am.”

This led to a series of decisions. One was asking the world to call him by a different name, Elliot, which he says he’s always liked. Page has a tattoo that says E.P. PHONE HOME, a reference to a movie about a young boy with that name. “I loved E.T. when I was a kid and always wanted to look like the boys in the movies, right?” he says. The other decision was to use different pronouns—for the record, both he/him and they/them are fine. (When I ask if he has a preference on pronouns for the purposes of this story, Page says, “He/him is great.”)

A day before we first speak, Page will talk to his mom about this interview and she will tell him, “I’m just so proud of my son.” He grows emotional relating this and tries to explain that his mom, the daughter of a minister, who was born in the 1950s, was always trying to do what she thought was best for her child, even if that meant encouraging young Page to act like a girl. “She wants me to be who I am and supports me fully,” Page says. “It is a testament to how people really change.”

Another decision was to get top surgery. Page volunteers this information early in our conversation; at the time he posted his disclosure on Instagram, he was recovering in Toronto. Like many trans people, Page emphasizes being trans isn’t all about surgery. For some people, it’s unnecessary. For others, it’s unaffordable. For the wider world, the media’s focus on it has sensationalized transgender bodies, inviting invasive and inappropriate questions. But Page describes surgery as something that, for him, has made it possible to finally recognize himself when he looks in the mirror, providing catharsis he’s been waiting for since the “total hell” of puberty. “It has completely transformed my life,” he says. So much of his energy was spent on being uncomfortable in his body, he says. Now he has that energy back.

For the transgender community at large, visibility does not automatically lead to acceptance. Around the globe, transgender people deal disproportionately with violence and discrimination. Anti-trans hate crimes are on the rise in the U.K. along with increasingly transphobic rhetoric in newspapers and tabloids. In the U.S., in addition to the perennial challenges trans people face with issues like poverty and homelessness, a flurry of bills in state legislatures would make it a crime to provide transition-related medical care to trans youth. And crass old jokes are still in circulation. When Biden lifted the ban on open service for transgender troops, Saturday Night Live’s Michael Che did a bit on Weekend Update about the policy being called “don’t ask, don’t tuck.”

Page says coming out as trans was “selfish” on one level: “It’s for me. I want to live and be who I am.” But he also felt a moral imperative to do so, given the times. Human identity is complicated and mysterious, but politics insists on fitting everything into boxes. In today’s culture wars, simplistic beliefs about gender—e.g., chromosomes = destiny—are so widespread and so deep-seated that many people who hold those beliefs don’t feel compelled to consider whether they might be incomplete or prejudiced. On Feb. 24, after a passionate debate on legislation that would ban discrimination against LGBTQ people, Representative Marie Newman, an Illinois Democrat, proudly displayed the pride flag in support of her daughter, who is trans. Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene, a Georgia Republican, responded by hanging a poster outside her office that read: There are TWO genders: MALE & FEMALE.

The next day Dr. Rachel Levine, who stands to become the first openly transgender federal official confirmed by the Senate, endured a tirade from Senator Rand Paul about “genital mutilation” during her confirmation hearing. My second conversation with Page happens shortly after this. He brings it up almost immediately, and seems both heartbroken and determined. He wants to emphasize that top surgery, for him, was “not only life-changing but lifesaving.” He implores people to educate themselves about trans lives, to learn how crucial medical care can be, to understand that lack of access to it is one of the many reasons that an estimated 41% of transgender people have attempted suicide, according to one survey.

Page has been in the political trenches for a while, having leaned into progressive activism after coming out as queer in 2014. For two seasons, he and best friend Ian Daniel filmed Gaycation, a Viceland series that explored LGBTQ culture around the world and, at one point, showed Page grilling Senator Ted Cruz at the Iowa State Fair about discrimination against queer people. In 2019, Page made a documentary called There’s Something in the Water, which explores environmental hardships experienced by communities of color in Nova Scotia, with $350,000 of his own money. That activism extends to his own industry: in 2017, he published a Facebook post that, among other things, accused director Brett Ratner of forcibly outing him as gay on the set of an X-Men movie. (A representative for Ratner did not respond to a request for comment.)

As a trans person who is white, wealthy and famous, Page has a unique kind of privilege, and with it an opportunity to advocate for those with less. According to the U.S. Trans Survey, a large-scale report from 2015, transgender people of color are more likely to experience unemployment, harassment by police and refusals of medical care. Nearly half of all Black respondents reported being denied equal treatment, verbally harassed and/or physically attacked in the past year. Trans people as a group fare much worse on such stats than the general population. “My privilege has allowed me to have resources to get through and to be where I am today,” Page says, “and of course I want to use that privilege and platform to help in the ways I can.”

Since his disclosure, Page has been mostly quiet on social media. One exception has been to tweet on behalf of the ACLU, which is in the midst of fighting anti-trans bills and laws around the country, including those that ban transgender girls and women from participating in sports. Mississippi Governor Tate Reeves says he will sign such a bill in the name of “protect[ing] young girls.” Page played competitive soccer and vividly recalls the agony of being told he would have to play on the girls’ team once he aged out of mixed-gender squads. After an appeal, Page was allowed to play with the boys for an additional year. Today, several bills list genitalia as a requirement for deciding who plays on which team. “I would have been in that position as a kid,” Page says. “It’s horrific.”

All this advocacy is unlikely to make life easier. “You can’t enter into certain spaces as a public trans person,” says the ACLU’s Strangio, “without being prepared to spend some percentage of your life being threatened and harassed.” Yet, while he seems overwhelmed at times, Page is also eager. Many of the political attacks on trans people—whether it is a mandate that bathroom use be determined by birth sex, a blanket ban on medical interventions for trans kids or the suggestion that trans men are simply wayward women beguiled by male privilege—carry the same subtext: that trans people are mistaken about who they are. “We know who we are,” Page says. “People cling to these firm ideas [about gender] because it makes people feel safe. But if we could just celebrate all the wonderful complexities of people, the world would be such a better place.”

Even if Page weren’t vocal, his public presence would communicate something powerful. That is in part because of what Paisley Currah, a professor of political science at Brooklyn College, calls “visibility gaps.” Historically, trans women have been more visible, in culture and in Hollywood, than trans men. There are many explanations: Our culture is obsessed with femininity. Men’s bodies are less policed and scrutinized. Patriarchal people tend to get more emotional about who is considered to be in the same category as their daughters. “And a lot of trans men don’t stand out as trans,” says Currah, who is a trans man himself. “I think we’ve taken up less of the public’s attention because masculinity is sort of the norm.”

During our interviews, Page will repeatedly refer to himself as a “transgender guy.” He also calls himself nonbinary and queer, but for him, transmasculinity is at the center of the conversation right now. “It’s a complicated journey,” he says, “and an ongoing process.”

While the visibility gap means that trans men have been spared some of the hate endured by trans women, it has also meant that people like Page have had fewer models. “There were no examples,” Page says of growing up in Halifax in the 1990s. There are many queer people who have felt “that how they feel deep inside isn’t a real thing because they never saw it reflected back to them,” says Tiq Milan, an activist, author and transgender man. Page offers a reflection: “They can see that and say, ‘You know what, that’s who I am too,’” Milan says. When there aren’t examples, he says, “people make monsters of us.”

For decades, that was something Hollywood did. As detailed in the 2020 Netflix documentary Disclosure, transgender people have been portrayed onscreen as villainous and deceitful, tragic subplots or the butt of jokes. In a sign of just how far the industry has come—spurred on by productions like Pose and trailblazers like Mock—Netflix offered to change the credits on The Umbrella Academy the same day that its star posted his statement on social media. Now when an episode ends, the first words viewers see are “Elliot Page.”

Today, there are many out trans and nonbinary actors, directors and producers. Storylines involving trans people are more common, more respectful. Sometimes that aspect of identity is even incidental, rather than the crux of a morality tale. And yet Hollywood can still seem a frightening place for LGBTQ people to come out. “It’s an industry that says, ‘Don’t do that,’” says director Silas Howard, who got his break on Amazon’s show Transparent, which made efforts to hire transgender crew members. “I wouldn’t have been hired if they didn’t have a trans initiative,” Howard says. “I’m always aware of that.”

So what will it mean for Page’s career? While Page has appeared in many projects, he also faced challenges landing female leads because he didn’t fit Hollywood’s narrow mold. Since Page’s Instagram post, his team is seeing more activity than they have in years. Many of the offers coming in—to direct, to produce, to act—are trans-related, but there are also some “dude roles.”

Downtime in quarantine helped Page accept his gender identity. “I was finally able to embrace being transgender,” he says.

Page was attracted to the role of Vanya in The Umbrella Academy because—in the first season, released in 2019—Vanya is crushed by self-loathing, believing herself to be the only ordinary sibling in an extraordinary family. The character can barely summon the courage to move through the world. “I related to how much Vanya was closed off,” Page says. Now on set filming the third season, co-workers have seen a change in the actor. “It seems like there’s a tremendous weight off his shoulders, a feeling of comfort,” says showrunner Steve Blackman. “There’s a lightness, a lot more smiling.” For Page, returning to set has been validating, if awkward at times. Yes, people accidentally use the wrong pronouns—“It’s going to be an adjustment,” Page says—but co-workers also see and acknowledge him.

The debate over whether cisgender people, who have repeatedly collected awards for playing trans characters, should continue to do so has largely been settled. However, trans actors have rarely been considered for cisgender parts. Whatever challenges might lie ahead, Page seems exuberant about playing a new spectrum of roles. “I’m really excited to act, now that I’m fully who I am, in this body,” Page says. “No matter the challenges and difficult moments of this, nothing amounts to getting to feel how I feel now.”

This includes having short hair again. During our interview, Page keeps rearranging strands on his forehead. It took a long time for him to return to the barber’s chair and ask to cut it short, but he got there. And how did that haircut feel?

Page tears up again, then smiles. “I just could not have enjoyed it more,” he says.”

[sunfish-studies]

Sour

✄・・�� Crisp Leaves [Aoba Johsai Manager Series]

➜ Pairing: Aoba Johsai x Manager! Reader

➜ Warning: none, just fluff and jealousy.

➜ Notes: Manager in this story will be portrayed as a girl. She will be tall, around 170.5 cm.

[Re-Post]

↷ SUMMARY ↶

They didn’t need to fight anyone for your attention–however, it seemed that they need to re-evaluate the statement if you’re around simpletons from another team.

Yes, there’s no manager better than you–Seijoh could say this with utmost pride. You scored yet another practice camp but this time with another school group. Apparently, a friend of your father from Tokyo, who’s a coach for a high school volley team called and asked if you want to participate in a practice camp.

“Now, thanks to your manager, we managed to get another practice camp and this time it’s in Tokyo,” Coach Irihata announced, which made the team blinked. “The details will be explained by your manager.”

“Nekomata-sensei, Nekoma’s coach, invited us to join in the Fukurodani Academy Group training camp.” You began. “So, there will be around four schools who participate in this–Nekoma High School, Fukurodani Academy, Shinzen High School, and Ubugawa High School. And you guys need to hear another exciting news,”

You grinned. “Apparently, he also invited Karasuno High School!”

That’s the prologue of the whole event and another future problem befallen to the team.

“Hey, hey, hey! Did you see my straight, [Name]-chan!? It’s awesome right!?”

“It sure did, Bokuto-san.”

“W-what about my feint!?”

“It’s amazing too, Shoyo-kun.”

Cue to series of stuttered thank you and a loud series of laugh booming in the gym.

You weren’t a type of person who blatantly ignore someone, especially when it was harmless–which was the reason why you were quick to be surrounded by a bunch of simpletons who were strive for praises. Before was Hinata and Kageyama, and now another two has arrived as soon as they joined the training camp.

Much worse? You indulged their antics and even called them cute. Them? Stealing your attention could be called cute? No.

Well, now that they thought about it–you’ve been stealing attentions when you stepped into the building.

“Woow! You’re super tall! Are you really a manager!?” Fukurodani’s enthusiastic captain jumped in, standing right in front of you. Maybe it’s because he never saw someone like you and this would be the first time he did.

“Bokuto-san, you’re being rude.” Their setter, Akaashi, immediately interjected. “I’m sorry, sometimes he couldn’t control himself.”

“And you’re way taller than Yaku-san! Look Yaku-san she’s taller than you!” a huge mixed foreigner with over 6 foot tall also joined in with the same enthusiasm–and earning a kick on the back from Nekoma’s libero, Yaku.

“LEV! Stop bothering other people!”

“A-another beautiful lady manager!!” A guy with mohawk cut screamed, his eyes filled with tears.

“Yamamoto, shut up!!”

That sums about what would happen for the next few days–total chaos. That and the fact you flaunted over Kageyama almost constantly was also rather tick them off.

“Tobio-kun, you’re in good shape today! The setter dump you did was amazing! It caught me off guard!”

“T-thank you!”

Oikawa grumbled, tightening his grip on his drinking bottle in frustration. He then turned to look at their coach and pointed out the irritating display of relationship. “Coach, do something about that!”

“What? Why?” Coach Irihata rose an eyebrow, not getting what he meant. “She always did her job taking notes, brief you, and prioritizing at taking care of you. She did that after she’s finished with her job, I have no complains.”

“But coach!” the brunette whined.

“I have to say it’s quite pissing me off for some reason,” Hanamaki commented, frowning slightly at how you strive on a comfortable conversation with Kageyama.

Most of them knew the kind of relationship you’re in–Kageyama’s safe place is you since you’re the one who sticked to him since middle school even through his lowest moment as the King of the Court. Meanwhile, you never forget Kageyama after graduated, keeping close contact with him even frequently have an outing with him during break.

Still, they couldn’t swallow down the green monster called jealousy to surfaced.

“No wonder I always feel frustrated,” Kindaichi muttered underneath his breath.

“Right?” Yahaba remarked. “I know senpai is kind, but still-!”

Iwaizumi couldn’t help but sighed over his team member’s own weirdness and Matsukawa decided to pat his back in consolation. The brunette glanced at Kyotani (who looked done with Oikawa and Yahaba), Kunimi (who pouted but still keep silent), and finally Watari (who didn’t know what to say). At least there were some people who’s still sane.

But there were times Iwaizumi himself getting pissed off–no, not because [Name] had her attention elsewhere. It’s because every time he felt there’s something he needed, there’s always someone who’s interrupting.

When it’s break time, Iwaizumi decided it would be the best choice to tape his fingers because he jammed them a little while blocking Bokuto’s spike. The sheer power was impressive. Approaching their manager, he said, “[Name], I need help in taping my fingers-“

“Hey, [Name]-chan!!” Fukurodani’s captain cut him off with his loud greeting (and since when he’s on first name basis anyway?). “Are my spikes amazing today!? What do you think!? It’s amazing right? Right!?”

With the tape in hand, you turned your head to face him and smiled at his eagerness. “They’re all amazing, Bokuto-san. Especially the line shot you did, it’s intense!”

“RIGHT!?” there went his boisterous laugh.

“Is it comfortable enough?” you asked Iwaizumi as he flexed his fingers–checking it briefly.

He hummed. “Maybe a little tighter-“

“[Name]-senpai! Please tape my fingers too!” Iwaizumi felt his eyebrow twitched from the second interruption he received. Lev was jogging towards them with his own tape in hand.

“Sure, Haiba-kun,” you easily agreed. “Wait until Hajime’s turn is done, okay? Hajime, what about now?”

“It’s good. When should I get this off-“

“[Name]-senpai!! Can you help me with the receives!?” this time it was Hinata and Iwaizumi just wanted to bang his head to the nearest wall.