#really driving home the intoxicating nature of these hours long phone calls

[bunnyreaper]

ch2 of collars and cages is already 3.5k words what the fuck is johnny doing to me!!!!!!!!

[sorcererinthestars]

You’ve Got a Fast Car...

I’m back, bitches~~ But seriously, felt great to write again for the @rtwritingcommunity​‘s secret sunshine event! I will tag my recipient if/when I get their a-ok!

Summary: (FAHC) Michael doesn't expect a man to throw himself in front of his car and beg him to stop. This is Los Santos. Picking up hitchhikers is generally frowned upon. But this man has a pretty face and hell - he's got a fast car. What's he got to lose?

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32969470

-

Michael knew something was seriously wrong when a man throws himself out in front of his car.

Now, his car was nothing nice, but he still doesn't want to spend the next few hours getting some fucking asshole's blood off of his front bumper. So naturally he slams on the brakes as the man - a skinny, dirty thing with wild hair - does a legitimate fucking slide across the hood of his shit Honda Civic and nearly collapses on the other side. "Oi!"

"Get out of the damn road, idiot!" Michael yells out the window in a reply, flicking him off to boot. It was late, almost 2am at this point, and he really had anything better to do than scream at some (probably high) dickbag who decided to do calisthenics in the goddamn street. But the man doesn't run away ashamed, as Michael had expected. Instead, he frantically pokes at his phone - still in the middle of the street - and Michael sits there, a bit flabbergasted.

He doesn't move.

He still doesn't move when Michael lays his entire weight on the horn, sending a blast of sound into the Los Santos night. It's not as loud or annoying as he may have wanted - LS is always loud as fuck on a Saturday evening - but it does have the intended effect of nearly making the idiot in front of his car in the middle of the street jump half out of his skin.

"SHHH!" the man gasps, comically putting his finger over his lip like he was in a cartoon and making an over-exaggerated shushing motion. Michael has to blink. He's shushing him? While standing in front of his car? Before he can say anything or shake off the disbelief that this shit had to happen to him tonight - he had to get home and clean off before his next shift at the pizza place he had reluctantly taken a job at - the man (still crazy-eyed and wild-haired) runs up to his window. At this moment, Michael really wishes he had invested in a knife, or a Tazer, or something. People had warned him about LS, but he didn't listen. He should probably learn to do that, someday.

"Listen, man," the guy says (see?) and leans forward, a massive grin on his face. He has some pretty high cheekbones. Michael blinks. "Dude, can you please just move or I'm gonna run you the fuck down."

"No, no, no, listen," the man says again, waving his hands about. "Do me a favor, will ya? If you drive me to this address -" he holds his phone up and shows an address on the outskirts of the city - "I'll give you $1,000. Right here, right now, no questions." Michael blinks and then snorts. Yeah fucking right. "I'm not an Uber."

The man shifts on both his feet, looking agitated, and glances over his shoulder. There sounds like there's some sort of commotion coming down the street and he really has to move. So Michael leans on the horn again, blasting another honk into the LS skyline.

This has the unintended effect of making the man lean further over the hood of his car, as if he could hide. Remember. This was in the middle of the goddamn street.

"Dude!"

"I'm not kidding!" the wild-eyed man says frantically. "$1500. Deposited directly into your account. I'm serious, kill me and my crew if I lie."

That was no turn of phrase Michael had ever heard, but the money does make him pause. He's... short on funds right now. Well, he's always short on funds, but this time moreso than usual. $1,500 extra would be a huge boost to the amount he currently has in the bank. He'd pay rent. He wouldn't have to borrow any more from anyone else and avoid that loan shark fucker he found online.

Before he could really think about what he was saying, he finds himself tapping the passenger seat. "Fine. Get in. I swear to god, I better see that money."

And if he dies... well. Then he still wouldn't have to worry about rent, so win-win in his mind.

With a triumphant holler, the man leaps into the car and yanks up a GPS on his phone, pointing them to drive down the street. "Thanks man! I'm Gavin." -

They're not going more than five minutes when sirens start blaring behind them. The man tenses and looks backwards out the window with a frown. "Oh shit."

Michael immediately - immediately - realizes just how much he fucked up. "What do you mean, oh shit?"

"I - uh..." The unhinged man - Gavin - stutters. "Did... Did I mention that uh... the LSPD may want to arrest me?"

"May want to what?!" Michael's voice climbs so many octaves in that last word that it makes Gavin slump down in his seat, suitably chagrined. "I ... seriously, man, I - I needed a car, a way out, I promise I'll give you the money, just please for the love of god, drive the damn car."

"Pull Over," the cop car unhelpfully calls from behind them, making Michael's bowels turn to water. Gavin's even more frantically slamming keys on his phone as they approach a major intersection. Michael keeps looking behind him, unable to slow down as the cops continue to chase them. "Gavin, seriously..."

"You're with me now, man," he replies a bit frantically. "You're in it. So either we avoid them, or you're going to jail too. Sorry."

The words fall like bricks on Michael's shoulders as he realizes that what Gavin just said was true. No cop in their right mind would believe that he - a man with a few blotches on his permanent record already - would have just accepted to pick up a hitchhiker and drive him across town at 2am for $1,500 without assuming he was a criminal. No. Any sane cop would assume he was in on it.

Because the alternative was that he was a fucking lunatic, but here we are.

Gritting his teeth, a conscious shift happens somewhere in his gut. He's a survivor. He'd get the fuck out of this, one way or the other. So, without Gavin's input and in a split second decision, he takes a sharp left and rips around the corner, sending Gavin flying against the door with a shout of surprise. "HEY!"

"Gotta avoid the cops, don't we?" Michael says with a maniacal burst of laughter, the insanity that can only be best described as hysteria. "You're the navigator, idiot, get us to where we need to be!"

The nervousness - which had appeared on Gavin's face after Michael had blown up at him - evaporated as Gavin bursts into a big smile. "Hell yeah," he hums. "Let's do this."

-

After fifteen minutes, Michael had lost all his nerves. Instead, he felt like an overinflated balloon, filled with a giddy sort of lunacy that he had never felt before as they flew down abandoned Los Santos streets. He shrieked with laughter as they slipped down the runway illuminated by neon lights and flashing red and blues, which whipped around them like a rave of their own design.

The freedom was intoxicating. Michael had taken drugs before back in New Jersey, who hadn't(?), but this was a whole different sort of high. And as soon as Gavin realized that Michael was in it with him, he had turned into an erratic demon of death, urging Michael onward with the same fire that was reflected in Michael's soul.

They flew down the streets like hedonists, shrieking with laughter and happiness as Gavin shoves his head out the sunroof to flick off the cops and shout insults.

When the first gunshot cracks through the night, Michael is sobered only for a moment. In for a penny, in for a pound. He's already here, dodging the cops, so this shit may as well happen. It's like he's in a godforsaken video game but he's not. This is real life, this is his life, and maybe he's ruining it. Maybe. But what had he not ruined in his life already? For a few moments, he could feel like he was disconnected from reality, driving so fast he could swear he could fly, a - undeniably pretty - man urging him to new, foolish lengths from the seat next to them.

And so they flew. As they approached intersections and traffic lights, Michael could see - more like sense - Gavin's own particular talents. He admits he has no abilities behind the wheel, hence begging Michael to help him, but he's able to make every traffic light change from here to the safehouse, giggling like a school kid all the while, knowing he was being naughty but that just sends them into a more frenzied set of hysterics.

It tastes like the best drug, the most collective high, the freedom that comes from knowing you're one step away from death or worse but that dangle is intoxicating. Maybe ten minutes ago he hated what was happening, but all that was gone now.

It's just the car, him, and Gavin's frantic - musical - laugh.

-

Eventually - with Gavin's GPS and eventually warm hand over his - they lose the cops. Michael has no sense of time, no concept of how long they were on the roads causing havoc, fleeing and laughing and shrieking like demons.

All he knows is that he's out in the North now and the beginning shards of sun were peeking over the horizon. He's able to slow to a manageable speed and catch his breath.

Gavin's phone rings and the man answers it. Michael can't hear what he's saying past the ringing in his ears, the result of wind whipping past his face and hours of excitement. His face is red when he meets Gavin's eyes. He closes the phone and the excitement shines bright in his eyes.

For a moment, Michael's breath is taken away. Then Gavin just points. "Top of Chilliad. Get me there." His voice is hoarse from yelling, deeper than it was, and it stirs something that Michael can't explain.

"Yes, sir," he hums teasingly. In for a penny, in for a pound, like he had said before. They start the climb up the dirt road. Once or twice, Michael doesn't think his car can make it, but the tenacious Civic crawls forward as if it knows what it had done too and felt on top of the world.

They make it to the top as the sun finally breaks over the horizon completely, blanketing the world in orange and red. When Michael finally - finally- throws the car in park and looks over at him, Gavin's grinning the biggest grin Michael has ever seen.

Before he can do anything, fuelled by adrenaline and fire and the same pure joy on Gavin's face, Michael leans over and kisses him deeply, half dragging him over the stick shift.

They kiss feverishly for a few moments, the adrenaline fading, before breaking apart and chuckling sheepishly. "I - sorry, I ..."

Gavin just winks. It's knowing. "No problem, luv," he purrs. "Does it to you, doesn't it? The chase? Makes the fire in your blood run hot." He leans forward conspiratorially. "Men weren't made to walk on their knees," he hums. "Think about it." He digs in his pocket and drops a card on the passenger seat before climbing out of the door, even as Michael tries to grab his arm and yank him back. "Gav--"

"Later, beautiful," Gavin grins, seemingly more suave and sophisticated than the man he was when he first climbed into the car. Like he was grifting and Michael was his poor, unsuspecting mark. "I'll call you. You're a great driver. Check your account." He salutes and it's then when Michael can hear the thud-thud of roters. A helicopter?

Before he can say anything, climbing frantically out of the car to watch, Gavin grabs a rope ladder hanging off the bottom of a fucking cargobob and is lifted into the air, disappearing quickly out of sight like something out of a fairy tale.

And Michael is left in the remains of the sun-drenched LS morning, with a car almost empty of gas and mysteriously $1,500 richer.

Whatever had happened to him that night in Los Santos, he knows his life will never, ever be the same.

[poguesrforlife]

Young and Beautiful | Rudy Pankow - Part 3

Okay first of all I’m sorry it took me so long but here is part three finally. Honestly I don’t know how to feel about this because at first I wanted it to be a filler chapter and then I thought I couldn't let you hang like this so I just poured it all out. I still have some more ideas about where this might go but you guys tell me if this feels already finished to you. AND AS ALWAYS THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! for all the love and support you give, I see you all and couldn't be more thankful xxx

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Trigger warning: alcohol, swearing, nothing too smutty, a little angst and a lot of jealousy

Word count: 3,741 word (god this is so long I’m sorry)

Y/N just got the role of her lifetime, starring beside the cast of Outer Banks in the second season as JJ’s love interest. It’s a dream come true and gets even dreamier when she meets Rudy Pankow her alleged love interest. Lines start to blur between reality and film and Y/N is left wondering if taking a leap of faith is worth risking her career.

[GIF not mine credits to owner]

Days passed and filming never stopped, neither did the thought of Rudy in your mind. It was constant, the sun rose and so did your thoughts of him, the night came and so did he in your dreams. By now you were convinced that this feeling would not go away anytime soon.

Maybe some distraction would do you good. 

“How about we go out tonight?” You proposed to the girls as you were lounging in your living room, painting toe-nails, scrolling through instagram and what-not. 

“Like out out?” Madelyne’s face lit up as she looked up from her bright yellow nail polish and passed the same expression to Madison. You nodded with a smile.

“I’d be down,” Madison agreed and sprang up from the couch in a matter of seconds.

“Oh, this is exciting! Let me call the boys,” Madelyne exclaimed and got up, waddling weirdly with her still wet toe nails to her phone on the kitchen bar.

Your face fell for a second. That was not exactly what you had in mind. You wanted a distraction from Rudy and him dancing in a sweaty club with beautiful women wouldn’t really help your current state of emotions. But you couldn’t let the girls know that. After shooting the other day they wouldn’t shut up about how one could feel the sexual tension between the two of you and you were just happy they hadn’t seen the sex scene.

“You good?” Bailey inquired as she noticed your sour face. You were quick to plaster a fake smile on your lips.

“Yeah, I’m just tired of sitting around all the time. This will do us some good!” You headed towards the bathroom to get a shower before going out and also to have a moment to yourself to prepare for tonight.

“The boys are down as well!” You heard Maddie scream from the kitchen and then she passed by you as fast as she could to look through her wardrobe. 

“Somebody is excited,” Bailey muttered beside you but joined her friend with a grin and helped her pick out something to wear. 

A couple hours later you were dressed to kill and ready to go. Even though you loved the Outer Banks clothing style, it reminded you of your hometown, it was nice to doll-up every now and then. Madison was taking pictures of you three in the big mirror besides the entry when you heard a knock on the door.

Madelyn was quick to open it and you were met with five handsome men staring back at you.

Chase escaped a whistle when he took all three of you in but you noticed how his eyes stayed on Madelyn just a bit too long. You made sure to remember asking him about it later. 

“Well, hot damn,” Rudy exclaimed as he entered the apartment and his eyes landed on the short dresses you were wearing.

“Eyes up here,” Madison warned him with a smile and pointed to her own brown ones.

“Not fair,” Austin gasped, clearly thinking you were playing with their feelings. Maybe you were. When Bailey had proposed to impress some folks tonight you at least had a special someone in mind. Who was to say the others didn’t have too?

Your eyes wandered over the boys outfits, all dressed up and looking incredibly handsome. Rudy sported a cream sweater and a cute little beige hat. You didn’t know why he would wear a hat to go clubbing but you knew he loved them. 

“Are you ready to head out then?” Drew smiled at you in his bright yellow shirt and motioned towards the door.

You piled out the door and headed downstairs to get an uber to your favourite club.

“I’m not sure if I like you in heels, Y/N. You’re almost as tall as me,” Chase pointed out as he walked behind you and took in your much taller figure.

“You’ll just have to deal with it, I guess,” You laughed and did an immaculate pirouette on your heels, something you had practiced a thousand times in your room back home.

“Would you look at her,” Madison squealed with joy as she watched your boost of confidence and joined you by linking your hands together and strutting down the sidewalk like it was a runway. 

It felt good to really feel yourself again after your uncertain emotions. Even though you noticed how a certain male’s eyes kept looking at your and your friend’s long legs, you didn’t care at the moment. You were having fun and you deserved it. 

All of you split up into several cars and then you were on your way to La Push, a vibrating ambient establishment the cast had dug out last year while filming in Charleston. The girls swore that you would have the best night out ever at that particular club.

You were not disappointed as you took in the colourful lights shining on the rustic open brick walls and the retro bar in the corner. The ages of the people were mixed all through but you could clearly see that everybody was enjoying themselves.

“Drinks?” Deion asked and nodded towards an empty table next to the bar and you all headed in the direction through the crowded area of dancing bodies.

“Milady.” Rudy offered you his hand with a posh English accent as you were about to try mastering a step in your heels. 

“Thank you, kind sir,” You smiled at him and put your hand in his and let him help you down. You couldn’t keep yourself from curtsying as he laughed at you playing along. His hand held yours tight in his as he led you to some barstools. 

“Gin Tonic with a lemon slice for the lady?” He ordered with a questioning look in your direction once the bartender got your attention. You couldn’t believe he memorised your go-to drink, as you nodded thankfully. “And a Corona for me please,” He finished and watched the bartender tend to your order.

After he payed for both of your drinks you thanked him, almost having to scream as the music was too loud, and he grabbed your hand back in his to help you down from the stool.

“Sure thing, sugar.” He gave you that unmistakable Rudy smile and once again the butterflies in your stomach began soaring. 

You had to pull yourself together. You were here to distract yourself from him not fall deeper for his charm. Although you had to admit he was not making it easy for you. 

Your other friends had ordered at the table and were ready to clink glasses once you joined them. 

“To a great night,” JD proposed and raised his glass.

“And to great friends,” You joined in and held up your own Gin Tonic.

“Hear, hear,” Austin agreed and the whole group cheered in joyous laughter as you brought your drinks to the middle. You greeted the familiar taste of the alcohol with open arms and enjoyed the light burning you were quite used to by now. 

Once you set your glass back on the table, Bailey raised a brow at your already half empty glass and you simply shrugged your shoulders. You needed to let loose tonight. 

“Dance with me,” You screamed over the music and grabbed her hand and your drink and made your way towards the dance floor.

Madison was the best dancer you knew and she proved it to you once again after some R&B music started playing. Your hips were shaking, your arms wildly flailing around and your feet shuffling over the floor as you downed your glass quickly. You already felt slightly buzzed, maybe you should have eaten more before going out. 

Jonathan joined the two of you quickly, just as good a dancer as your dear curly friend, and together they stole the show. You watched in awe as they moved to the music so carelessly and were a bit jealous at their easy-going nature. 

“C’mon Y/N, show me what you got!” Drew encouraged you suddenly from beside you with an outstretched hand. You slipped closer to him and swayed your hips as he twirled you around in his arms and laughed as he dipped you back. Maybe the distraction would work after all. You didn’t know for how long the both of you danced but you felt absolutely weightless. 

“I’m impressed Starkey,” You admitted as he flew with you over the dance floor, not once missing the beat. 

“Could say the same about you Y/L/N but I had a feeling you would be a good dancer,” He smirked and turned you around so your back was pressed against his chest and let his hands wander to your hips. 

At this point you were on your third drink, a bit too intoxicated, and not quite sure if this scenario would play out well. Drew was the perfect gentleman and absolutely sweet and handsome. You liked him a lot but… But he wasn’t Rudy. His hands on your body didn’t feel like a wildfire and his scent didn’t drive you crazy and his smile did not make your head spin. You cursed yourself for these thoughts. 

You looked up, your eyes roaming the club for a certain blond head of hair. You noticed Chase and Maddy dancing intimately with each other in one corner but chose to ignore it, you had a different mission. 

“I’ll be right back,” You told Drew with an apologetic smile as you turned to look at him and he looked confused for a second. “I’m just going to the bathroom.”

“Be careful in here, it’s better if you don’t go by yourself,” He reminded you, always the protective type, and looked out over the club probably searching for Bailey.

“I’ll be fine,” You reassured him with a pad on the chest and slipped out of his embrace towards the restrooms.

On your way there you finally found your man of the hour. To your amusement Rudy was dancing with an elderly woman to some pop song and looked like he was having the time of his life. You felt the corners of your mouth lifting as you took in the scene. 

You slipped into the restroom to freshen up as your eyes met the mirror. The carefully applied makeup from Madison was smeared under your eyes, your lipstick long gone and your hair was basically a mess. But despite all you looked happy, you looked alive. You quickly touched up your appearance and rejoined the others. 

As soon as you stepped out however you were met with quite the unpleasant sight. There was a beautiful woman next to Rudy, one arm on his biceps as she leaned forwards to say something to him. It shouldn’t bother you, you knew that he was an attractive man with many qualities. But as his hand rested on her waist your throat tightened and you felt embarrassment deep in your bones. Of course he didn’t want you the same way you did. It was just acting and you were friends, it didn’t mean anything. But it had meant something, to you anyways. And that’s what you got for giving into your feelings. You watched them laughing together, inching closer to each other each second and your heart burned in pain. 

You turned around stumbling to your table as you tried to suppress the tears welling in your eyes. How could you have been so stupid? It was a stupid crush nothing more. 

Drew’s eyes lit up as you made your way towards his sitting figure at the table next to some of your friends. You had two choices here: Going home now and giving in to your stupid irrational feelings and ruining your night. Or doing what you were here for and distract yourself with a fucking good time. The answer came to you immediately.

“I don’t know about you guys but I was thinking about some tequila!” You proposed with a big fake smile as you looked at your friends and the others cheered in chorus.

“A round of tequila shots for the table please,” Chase told the waiter and soon enough salt, limes and shot glasses filled to the brim with the transparent liquid were brought to you.

“Cheers bitches!” You clinked glasses, licked up the salt on your hand, downed the shot of the devil’s brew and bit in the sour lime and laughed at the faces the others made after finishing their own shots.

You were having a good time tonight, even if it took killing your mind to do so. Which seemed to be the only option after another round of shots and some more Gin Tonics and you still felt like shit every time your eyes met Rudy’s figure. The girl from before was long gone but you couldn’t help but feel betrayed. How did he not see that you were obviously hooked on him? 

He came back to your table were everybody was laughing and having a good time, everyone except you it seemed.

“Are you alright?” He asked and plopped down beside you, throwing his arm over the couch behind you.

“Just peachy,” You heard the slurring in your voice yourself not as clear as you wanted it to be and cringed a bit. But just because you were drunk that didn’t mean you had a problem. You were fine.

“How much did you have to drink?” He inquired concerned and you saw his forehead wrinkle. Your hand automatically reached out to brush his worry away.

“What’s it to you, sugar?” You deliberately used the nickname he had given you before and you actually saw a smirk on his face as you drew your hand away from his forehead, the sour expression gone.

“I think it’s better if I take you home,” He laughed when you fell back against the couch trying to look mad at him.

“I can take myself home, thank you very much,” You argued, your words still a bit slurred. He could take the fucking girl from before home for all you cared. He hadn’t spoken to you all night and suddenly he wanted to take care of you. That’s not how that shit worked.

“Besides,” You interrupted him as he was about to say something else, “You didn’t dance with me all night. I really wanted to dance with you,” You pouted and cursed yourself a second after you registered what slipped out your mouth. Your eyes widened and you sat back up. Maybe you had an alcohol problem after all.

“Then dance with me, sugar.” Your head whipped around as soon as you heard him. He leaned back against the couch, an easy smirk playing on his lips as he eyed your figure. He never looked sexier to you.

“Let’s go then!” You jumped from the table, a bit too fast and swaying a bit, but you had to prove something to yourself. You could easily be friends with Rudy without any sexual tension. You just had to separate him from your roles in your head.

His arm sneaked around your waist seconds after and he pulled you down towards the dance floor, making sure you didn’t miss any steps like before. The feeling of his hand around you drove you insane so you grabbed it and shove it away with a grin. You were perfectly capable of walking by yourself. He just laughed and shook his head at your swaying figure. You were not sure what exactly was so funny to him in this moment. 

His hands however found yours again quickly as he held them and twirled you around carefully, pushing and pulling you every which way. You absolutely adored him but you needed distance. God, why had you willingly agreed to dance with him? Well, it had been your idea but anyways. 

You were glad when a faster song by Lizzo started and you entangled yourself from him to sway your hips on your own. Not many knew it but you danced a lot better when you were drunk for some reason. You were a lot less uptight and celebrated every body part of yours with free flowing moves. Rudy obviously enjoyed your newfound confidence as he mirrored your carelessness to the beat and cheered for you. The both of you were singing along to the music, jumping up and down and shimmying back and forth, having the time of your life. At one point you stole his head and put it on yourself, convinced that you looked irresistible with it but Rudy just laughed and got it back before throwing to your table where Austin caught it with a grin.

“Have I told you how good you look tonight?” He screamed over the music as he pushed himself closer to your body. His scent invaded your space and you immediately forgot why you had wanted distance from him in the first place.

“Tell me again,” You giggled and got closer to him as well. The songs changed again, something more sultry and slower, maybe the Weeknd or Miguel you weren’t sure as your attention was directed at yet another man.

“You look absolutely radiant,” He breathed and his alcoholic breath mingled with yours that’s how close you were.

Rudy’s hands found your waist again and this time you didn’t push him away. The opposite, you rested your hands on his broad chest, feeling his fast beating heart under your right hand. He pulled you closer as you were obviously giving in to him and swayed his hips against yours, the movement making your head spin.

“Are you drunk?” You asked him. You needed him to be sober so at least one of you would remember this moment tomorrow after everything else faded away. You needed him to remember how your bodies felt pressed together in this moment. How your hearts were beating in synch to the bass rocking through you. 

“Absolutely intoxicated,” He answered with a straight, sexy voice. He didn’t sound drunk to you but his words proved you different. 

“Maybe we should-“ You stopped mid sentence as you pulled back and saw his hungry eyes directed at your lips. Whatever you wanted to say left your senses in that very second.

“…stop?” Rudy finished your sentence questioning but not making any moves to stop any of this, whatever this was. “I don’t ever want to stop. I just wanna spend forever getting high off what it feels like to be around you.”

Your breath caught at his words and your eyes slipped from his lips to his blue eyes, illuminated by the club lights occasionally. You saw the hunger in them, the unmistakable lust that was a hundred percent mirrored in your own y/e/c eyes.

He described perfectly what if felt like to be around him, like you were high, intoxicated by him. And that feeling, you never wanted it to end. 

“I’m drunk…” You told him but let out the ‘on you’ part that definitely was a part of this sentence.

“I know, me too. And I know we shouldn’t do anything that we might regret tomorrow,” He took a deep breath and one of his hands cupped your face. “But I can’t stay away from you any longer.”

“I feel the same,” You admitted and bit your lip to keep a smile from showing on your face. But it didn’t matter as Rudy’s lips moved into a grin.

“If two people can’t stay away from each other, maybe they aren’t supposed to.” You nearly groaned at his annoying habit of always being able to say the perfect thing at the right time. 

You moved closer to him, your arms slung around his neck and your hips still slowly moving to the music. Your eyelids dropped as your mouth longed for his, feeling his breath on your lips.

Unexpectedly soft his mouth landed on yours, so different from the kisses you shared on set. His lips slowly moved with yours, taking his time to get used to the feeling. And even though the heat from the other times lacked it was no less passionate. You poured every fibre of your being into kissing him and really feeling him. He tasted like tequila and forbidden dreams and if you weren’t drunk before, you definitely were now.

Rudy became more needy as the kiss went on, his lips moving faster and his hands pulling you closer against him. When his teeth caught your lower lip you were done for. Without any regard for reason you gave into him. His tongue slipped into your mouth battling with yours for dominance. Your mouths bumped clumsily against each other as you were smiling into the kiss, teeth biting here and there occasionally but you couldn’t care less. You had waited for this for too long to show any signs of hesitation. After what felt like an eternity you pulled apart, breathing heavily. Your eyes locked and it felt like ecstasy was coursing through your veins.

“There you are! We’ve been looking for you for at least an hour.” You were thrown into ice-cold water as JD’s voice pulled you back into reality. You looked at him, the rest of your friends heading towards the door. Rudy and you shuffled apart awkwardly and fixed yourself a little. Your short dress had ridden up and his hair was all over the place.

“C’mon guys, we’re leaving!” Chase shouted from afar.

Your eyes wandered to Rudy, a content smile lying on his swollen lips as he stared at the floor. His hand slipped around yours and he pulled you after him, walking backwards so he could look at you.

“Our little secret,” He said with a wink and cupped your cheek in his other hand, before pecking your lips once again secretly and then following the others outside and to the Ubers taking you back to your flats.

You were still not fully understanding what had just happened, if it was all a feverish dream caused by the alcohol. But every time you thought that this could only be in your imagination Rudy’s hand on your thigh or around your waist pulled you back into reality. This was no longer part of a role, this was real life. And you would enjoy every second of it.

Tags: @lovelymaybankk @sspidermanss @1d5sosddl @arthiriticcricket @teamnick @lieswithoutfairytales @styles-xoxo @normatural @k-k0129 @mileven-reddie @perfektionsmakel @1-800-imagines @http-cherries @golden-eroda @outofstyles13 @jj-maybank-stan @fandom-phaser @hopelesswritingxd @teenwaywardasgardian @poguecollins @jjswhore @xpastel-kawaiix @styles-edward-harry @rollinsstuff @obx-baby @masintahin @floretsoleil @ivebeenthinkingboutu @fandomxreaders @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch @pookie-cleary @kiarascarreras @runway-to-my-aid @saturnspack @sunshinemadds @hucklebaefinn @baileythepenguin @spider6oy @whoreforouterbanks​ @diego-klaus-hargreeves​

(I hope I didn’t miss anyone! If you’re not on here but would like to be send me a quick message xx)

[particularemu]

Bad Day | A Bang Chan Scenario

Word Count: 1119

Type: Smut fam

Warnings: uhhh riding, neck nibbling, idk this is pretty soft. 

Author’s Note: I wrote this in one go and I’m twitching because I really want to edit it, but I wanted to get this out to you because you’re having a bad day <3 @channiesmixtape​

I hope pure plotless porn will help somehow :3

Today was beyond frustrating. It was as if some cruel person up above decided to bombard you with endless paperwork, phone calls, drama, AND a blinding headache that made you want to down a handful of painkillers to ease the pain. A hot bath sounded wonderful — an hour alone in warm water to soothe your aching bones. 

Throughout the day, you texted Chan — telling him about the stress you were feeling about work. The highlight of your entire day was Chan’s phone call when you were on your lunch break. You got to hear his boyish giggles over the phone as he distracted you with stories about him and the boys. 

As soon as the clock struck 5, you were rushing out of the door, feet moving as fast as they could to get you away from that building. You wanted to get out of there as soon as possible — before anyone could ask you to stay for an extra hour or two. 

As soon as you opened the front door to your apartment, you were engulfed in a bear hug, feet lifting off the ground as Chan spun you around. “I missed you!” His joyous laugh instantly lifted your mood as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders. Your eyes closed as you enjoyed the feeling of his body against yours, arms holding him close as you listened to his heartbeat. Despite being pressed flush against the boy — you needed more. 

Your hands frantically pushed the jacket off his shoulders, throwing the thick fabric to the floor as you ripped open his button-up shirt. You would have laughed at the confused look on Chan’s face if you weren’t so focused on unbuckling the boy’s belt, fingers fumbling as Chan grabbed your shoulders, in an attempt to stop you. “Woah! Hold on.” 

“No. I want to have sex.” You said matter-of-factly. You couldn’t help the dark blush on your cheeks as your eyes raked over Chan’s toned torso, fingertips running along every dip and curve of his abs. “God, you’re sexy.”

Chan’s eyebrow raised, a dorky grin on his face as he slid, what was left of his shirt, off his shoulders. “Yeah?” The boy instantly pushed his pants down to the ground, underwear sliding down his toned legs soon after. “You think I’m sexy?”

“Shut up. You know how sexy you are.” You pushed the boy’s shoulders, giggling as he sat on the couch. You straddled his hips, connecting your lips with his as you ground onto his semi-hard cock. “Fuck I love you.” You moaned as Chan dug his heels into the carpet, grinding his hard-on along your core. “Oh my God, do that again.” Your arms wrapped around his neck, lips connecting with his as he lifted his hips once more. 

You parted from his intoxicating kiss, allowing Chan to lift your shirt off your body, fingers darting to unclasp your bra and toss it in a random direction. A pleasured sigh slipped past your lips as Chan’s hands ran up your body, squeezing your breasts once before patting your thigh. You sat up and pulled your pants and underwear down, making the boy chuckle as you straddled his hips again. “I was going to help you with that.” 

“I need you.” You practically pulled his head to your chest. “Now.” You lowered your hips onto him, mentally thanking the boy for lining himself up. His soft moan sounded like music to your ears as you felt the tip of his cock sink into your core, bottoming out in an instant. “Fuck you feel so good.” You moaned as your fingertips ran through his hair, brushing the brunette locks as your eyes drifted shut. Your head leaned back onto your shoulders, shaky moan slipping past your lips as you lifted your hips and lowered them, feeling every inch of his cock drag along your inner walls. 

Oh, how you loved to ride him. Chan’s cock tilted upward ever-so-slightly, naturally curving towards the spot that made you see stars. No matter how slow his pace, Chan always knew how to make you feel good. Chan’s lips pressed soft and gentle kisses along your neck as you rolled your hips against his, coaxing a moan from the both of you. You could feel Chan suck the skin of your neck between his teeth, tongue darting out to soothe the spot after his gentle nibbles. 

The boy reached between your bodies, rubbing slow and steady circles on your clit, making your hips shudder. You weren’t the strongest person on the planet. You could feel the burn in your thighs as you bounced onto him, legs shaking as you sunk back down onto him. Chan pulled one of your hands down to your clit, coaxing you to rub yourself as he planted his heels into the carpet, hands holding onto your thighs for leverage. Chan began to thrust upward, loud moans echoing through the room as he fucked you mercilessly. 

This is exactly what you’ve been thinking about the entire day. You couldn’t wait to get home and feel Chan inside you,  pounding into your pretty little pussy as your walls clenched around him. It didn’t take long — between your fingers on your clit and his cock driving into your g-spot, you saw white as an earth-shattering orgasm took over your senses. 

You could hear Chan’s groans as he came inside you, fingers pressing deep into your thighs as if his tight hold on you was the only thing to keep him grounded. You instantly fell forward, body resting against Chan’s as he held you close, breath hitching when your walls clenched around him through your aftershocks. 

“Thank you.” You nuzzled into his neck. “Thank you so much. I’m sorry.” 

“What are you apologizing for?” Chan chuckled and pulled you closer, soft lips planting a sloppy kiss to your cheek. “That was amazing.” 

You giggled and nuzzled further into his neck. “I kind of jumped you.” 

“You did, but I don’t mind.” Chan chuckled. 

��I love you so much.” You planted a soft kiss on his lips, laughing when his fingertips brushed across your ribs. 

“I love you too.” Chan kissed your forehead. “So so much.” He mumbled into your shoulder as you pulled him closer. 

Exhaustion from the day completely took over as you started to drift off. You could feel Chan lift you up, carrying you to the bedroom to tuck you in. You hummed happily, a small smile tugging at your lips as Chan crawled under the covers with you, arms wrapping around your waist. Chan was the one and only person who could take a bad day and turn it into something great — and you couldn’t thank him enough.

[carelessgraces]

@urobouris​ said:   🎉 !!!   ( new year’s eve kisses | not accepting )

"Do you often work through holidays?”

     She smiles at the sound of his voice, but she won’t admit to that. Astoria sits back in her chair, realizing with a start that her tea has long since gone cold when she reaches for her mug and finds it like ice in her grasp. “Only for my favorite clients,” she answers with a laugh, “and only on the cases I like,” and it feels silly and juvenile but she likes looking at his name on her phone, and hearing the low rumble of his laughter on the other line. “How’d you know I was working?”

     “Lucky guess.”

     “Oh?”

     “Actually, I’ve been knocking on your door for the past ten minutes. I have yet to see you tune out noise so thoroughly for anything besides work. You said you wanted to talk in person? The sooner, the better?”

     Astoria nearly trips over herself getting up from her desk, and it’s a small miracle that prevents her from spilling that cold tea across her laptop. “God. Sorry. What time is it?”

     “Quarter past eleven. I would have come tomorrow, but you said it was urgent.” 

     “It is. Shit. I’m sorry. Hold on — ”

     Less than a minute later she has the door thrown open to admit him, and she tells herself not to notice that there are snowflakes clinging to the wool of his coat, or that there’s a hint of color in his cheeks in response to the cold, or that when she’s not wearing heels he’s a solid foot taller than her, or that all of these things have made her positively weak at the knees. He steps through her door and into her home the same way he does everything: as if he commands everything he can see, as if he is utterly untouchable. 

     Intoxicating. That’s the word for him: intoxicating. She’s been trying to sort that out for weeks, now, and hasn’t managed it until this moment. Commanding, certainly. Powerful, without question. ( Spectacularly unbelievably beautiful, sure, in her less professional moments, and this is proving to be one of them. ) Behind him, Albert closes her front door, flips the locks back into place, and when he turns to face her again, he has one hand removing his scarf, the other holding out a bottle of champagne. 

     “Since it seems we are to spend the New Year together,” he says, and there’s an unexpected hint of teasing to his voice. That’s... rare. Also intoxicating. Astoria clears her throat, gestures for him to follow her into the kitchen, doubles back to take his coat — so sue her, she’s only human. 

     He pops the cork, he pours the champagne into the flutes she provides, and it strikes her suddenly that he’s never seen her like this before. Her hair is a mess of curls, freshly dried from the melted snow, and she’s traded in her Louboutins and blazers for a sweater and a pair of jeans and bare feet. For a moment Astoria considers bringing him to her office, but — well, they’ve passed the point of constant professionalism, she thinks.

     ( She’d had the presence of mind to reapply her armor — the signature red lip, a slash of scarlet in the glow of the kitchen’s light. She had hoped it would make her feel more in control. She had been fooling herself. ) 

     So she leans over the kitchen island, elbows resting on the granite top, and she presses her lips together for a moment before she speaks. Across from her, Albert takes a seat, and he watches her curiously as he waits for her to start. 

     “Umbrella reached out to me today.”

     He says nothing, only watches her.

     “I was out tonight.” A date, actually, in a very vain attempt to distract her, even if only momentarily, from what she’d like to be doing. She doesn’t mention that part. “My — companion stood to go to the restroom and while he was gone someone else took his seat.” She reaches into her back pocket to withdraw the folded check she’d slipped there, and she pushes it across the island for him. “Apparently I should be considering whose side I’m on.”

     Albert takes the check and looks at it. One eyebrow rises when he sees the amount. Still, he says nothing.

     “I was reminded that if this goes poorly, it could be the end of my career. Nothing too surprising; vague threats, a few comments about how much more money I could be making if I were to take a step back, a promise that I can expect to see them again.” 

     That gets a response. Albert’s jaw tightens, and he asks, voice slow and deliberate, “Threats of what nature?”

     “Nothing particularly inspired. Your career will suffer, blah blah, all a woman has these days is her professional reputation, yawn. There was a comment about knowing where I live and where I work and what I drive, but... this is hardly the first time I’ve been threatened.”

     She’s leaving something out. He knows it. “And?” he asks, and Astoria clears her throat, stalls for a moment by taking a drink. It’s good champagne. She’s a little furious about that; she would have loved to find something he didn’t know inside out and backwards, and yet he continues, stubbornly, to impress. 

     And then she looks at him, all six-foot-a-million of him and his broad shoulders and the absolute control with which he carries himself. Not a hair out of place. Not a single reaction without his command. She thinks he could control the beat of his heart if he tried. 

     Astoria shrugs one shoulder, as if it’s nothing. It’s most assuredly not nothing. “There may have been a gun pointed at me under the table.” 

     Abruptly, Albert stands. 

     “And there may have been pictures of me. You know, walking home, getting groceries, one or two of me asleep, just to show that they do, in fact, know where I live.” Somehow, that doesn’t bother her; the big bad corporation knows how to use the white pages, shocking, really shocking... “When my date didn’t come back, I assumed that had been a setup, so I paid and left, and I called you.”

     He moves around the island to stand in front of her. In less than a second he has her jaw in his hand, and he tips her face up to his, as if he’s getting a good look for bruises or scrapes, but his eyes don’t leave hers. “Were you hurt?”

     “No.”

     “Did they touch you?”

     “Nothing beyond taking my coat at the start of dinner. I left it at the restaurant, just in case.” A shame, really. It was a nice coat. “I’m fine, really.”

     There’s something almost cruel to the set of his jaw, and to the tremor in his hand, visible only for a fraction of a second before he presses his palm against the granite. ( Her skin is hot where he’d touched her, and it takes more effort than she’d like to confess to hide that. ) Before she can think better of it, Astoria covers his hand with hers and squeezes lightly. 

     “Albert.” Usually it’s Dr. Wesker. Occasionally, sir, when she’s being a brat and she wants to see a flash of possessive pride in his eyes. Never his first name. Never this familiarity. “Really. I’m fine.” 

     He looks her over once, then nods, setting his eyes on the window over her sink. She follows his gaze; their reflection is dark, a little distorted by the glass. “What do you intend to do?”

     “I’m staying with you,” Astoria says immediately, before clearing her throat and amending herself — “This case, I’m staying with this case, as long as you’ll have me. To make an attempt like this... they wouldn’t bother if they weren’t worried about the damage that could be done.”

     He considers her for a moment, then — “You should learn how to shoot. And you should get a gun.” 

     “You’ll have to recommend someone to teach me, then.”

     “I will teach you.”

     “Ah.”

     The corner of his mouth twitches upward into a crooked smile. “Hardly enthusiastic.” 

     “Guns make me nervous.”

     “As they should. Are you frightened to learn?”

     “No.”

     “Do I make you nervous?”

     “Extremely,” she answers, and he laughs. The sound is a little strained, but at least it’s there. It makes her bold. In the hall, the clock chimes the changing hour. One.

     “You would really stay, despite the threat?” He nods at the check, still sitting on the island. The clock continues to chime. Two. Three. “Or the offer?”

     Four. “Of course.” Five. “I told you, I’m in this. I meant it.” 

     “For the case?” Six.

     She shrugs one shoulder. He slips his hand out from under hers, steps just a bit closer. Seven. Eight. “Sure.” Nine. “Mostly, though — ” Nine. Ten. “ — for you.”

     For a moment she very seriously considers the merits of politely asking if he’d like to bend her over the kitchen table — eleven — but before she can talk herself out of anything he’s taking her jaw in his hand again, his grip tighter than before. “For me?”

     She nods. Twelve. The sound echoes in the hall, rings between them, and Albert leans forward, until he’s barely an inch from her, bows his head just enough to bring his mouth a breath from hers. 

     “Good,” he murmurs, lips nearly grazing hers as he speaks, and Astoria is a patient woman, she is, she knows that some things are worth the wait. He is sharp angles and steel against her, harsh and unyielding, and there is some animal part of her that sees the danger he poses and that almost wants to run — but she thinks she likes that. She thinks she likes that very much. 

     It’s light, chaste — a brush of his mouth over hers, and he holds her in place when she moves to chase him, lips curling up in a smile as he does. They stand there together for an hour, for a minute, for a hundred thousand years, and when he releases her and steps back there is a hint of scarlet on his skin, like a little smear of blood. 

     She wants him to break her, she thinks, and she very nearly asks for it — please, she wants to say, touch me, fuck me, do something, do anything — but he takes another step back from her and he watches her, simply watches her, and the words die in her throat. 

     “Are you safe here tonight?” he asks, and she nods wordlessly, as if she’s forgotten how to use her voice. ( That may very well be true. ) “In the morning, we can make arrangements to guarantee your security.” Without waiting for an answer he goes to the hall closet to gather his coat and scarf, and she follows, legs unsteady, worrying her lip between her teeth. 

     “You could stay,” she offers, and her voice is hoarse. He closes the closet door and winds his scarf around his neck, and he looks at her, and there’s something like amusement, something like affection, in the set of his mouth. 

     Her hands are shaking. He watches her for a moment, and he shakes his head. 

     “You should sleep,” he says finally, and his voice is, somehow, lower than usual. ( She wonders if she has any effect on him, if he’ll need a minute to catch his breath when he leaves. ) “Otherwise, I might.” 

     She locks the door behind him.

     ( In the morning, they don’t speak of it. )

[sometimeinjoon]

Feeling

2.3k, m

Ah, yes. The smell of your fucking Gucci perfume. Jungkook fucking hates it.

It’s not like he’s in any position to complain though, and he acknowledges that. “Yes, please give me the best seller,” he remembers telling the woman at the booth. One whiff and he wants to pass out. Perfect. Humans like these smells.

Mortals’ very presence pesters him, really. But you’re so soft. Literally. He has to hold himself when he’s around you. It’s going to be a bit gruesome for the god of the underworld to have to take his love down there; Charon won’t let him hear the end of it. “You did what?” he already pictures the ferryman chuckling. “Squeezed her tits too hard,” he’d have to answer. Whether that’s tragic or funny, he’s yet to decide. Usually he’d be prideful about his strength. But he doubts if he would be if he kills you with it.

It’s uncanny being around mortals, Jungkook thinks to himself. So fond of the physical things they can’t take when they pass. Fond of needlessly expensive things. Fond of weird jokes and —what were they called— emojis. This world doesn’t make sense to him. None of this does.

But oh does his heart flutter when you wear the lace lingerie he buys for you. And when you send the eggplant and tongue once you actually explain to him what it meant. He replies with that face that looks like a smirk and he’s livid that that makes you giggle. What the fuck?

But he also wants to make sure you’re happy. And spoiled. And feeling the emotions he has for you through tiny cartoons on your phone. He wants to clad you in silk that he’ll tear off once night falls. He wants you eating the finest food. It’s like this world is meant to make those who walk on it hypocrites: scoffing at things but indulging in them.

He’s in bed looking out the window and he wonders what it would be like to be a mortal. His rule in the underworld is coming to a close and he’s actually considering not staying as a guardian of the circles of hell. Even though he’s so fond of the weirdos in limbo. You did this to him. You made him want to be weak and materialistic and an emoji user. You made him want to be human.

He wonders if he’ll permanently like the way you smell when he converts. He wonders if he doesn’t need to worry about literally crushing you when he hugs you. He wonders what it would feel like to want to buy luxurious items “for the experience of having nice things”. If he does decide to become mortal, he’d be given a wonderful life here. The underworld owes him that much for having to deal with the literal worst assholes that have ever died. He’d be given a mansion, cars, money, acres upon acres of land.

He wants you there with him. He wants you laughing at the way he would mess up his sunny side up and settle for scrambled instead. He wants to put his hand on your thigh when you go for long drives. He wants to be as mortal as a mortal can be with you. He wants to indulge in the sins of the humans with you. He wants you to be his other half.

Then it settles on him that that’s what you are and what you have been for the past few months. You’ve accommodated him in your apartment and when he told you he’s literally Satan, you didn’t run away. You cook him meals he’s insisted he doesn’t need and you kiss his forehead when he pretends to fall asleep on your boobs.

It’s already 7 pm and he gets giddy because you’ll be home soon. He gets up and walks out of your bedroom and slumps himself onto the couch, drinking a bit of the ambrosia Hermes hooked him up with to turn his sense of smell into that of a mortal. It wears off after a few hours and he dare not waste it on hours he’s not with you. Hermes promised him a permanent ambrosia next week, and he’s excited.

One shot of that whiskey looking liquid and he’s drunk on the smell of the fabric softener you wash his clothes with and on the smell of the stargazers he bought you yesterday. And then you walk through the door and wow, fuck, that fucking Gucci perfume. He smiles from where he was seated and he can smell the takeaway you brought home, and dare he say it, he might suddenly be hungry.

He stands up to greet you once you place the bag on the coffee table. He gives you one of the lightest hugs he could muster and buries his face in your neck, the smell of your watermelon shampoo still so intoxicating even though there’s barely any scent left. He kisses your skin and he tells you he missed you. He asks you about your day and he listens. He listens to the most mundane things because he’s moved past being obliged to do so because it’s what humans do— he actually cares now. He cares about that dick that didn’t hold the elevator open for you. He cares about all the paperwork you finished so you could take the day off on Saturday. He cares about the donut place you and your friend tried out for lunch. He cares that you want to take him there on the weekend since you wouldn’t have work.

He smiles as you speak, and he smiles as you hand him the dinner he wants to remind you he doesn’t need. He smiles as he eats it and he smiles as he enjoys it, as he enjoys this simple thing with you. At this point, you’ve made him human. You’ve made him appreciate the little things being a god doesn’t provide. You’ve made him love.

Then he smiles when you kiss him. He smiles when you straddle him and tell him you’ve missed him too. He smiles as he wraps his arms around your waist and welcomes you into his chest. For the first time, he feels like he doesn’t need to be urgent with you. He doesn’t need to tear off your clothes and pin you to the bed like he’s so used to. And so he lets you feel that through his kiss. He lets you feel that in the way he caresses your body.

You’re wondering why Jungkook’s being so gentle and you ask him if he’s okay.

“I’ve already told you a million times, gods don’t do anything humans do,” he laughs. “We don’t get tired, we don’t get hungry, we don’t get sick.”

You nod and think of how he just doesn’t seem like a god when he’s with you. You think of how upset he gets when you overwork and how happy he gets when you bring home books written about him and his brothers. He seems so normal, so full of emotion. You tell him your thoughts and he says you’re right.

“We’re like humans in that regard, I do agree,” he says silently, kissing your knuckles. He looks at you and you’re wondering what he’s doing, what he’s feeling. Why he’s so kissy and so lax. Why he hasn’t carried you off into bed and spanked you a few times. Why you’re still clothed at this hour.

He pulls you to him and hugs you. He lays his hands flat against your back and starts moving them in circles. He notices how you relax under his touch and he feels a sense of pride that he can do that. That he can cause you something that isn’t pain. Pain is what he is good at, and for the longest time he thought it was the only thing he was capable of even when he strives to give you pleasure. He massages the small of your back and you moan— you moan! You moan at something that isn’t sex! Humans do that?

He runs his hands lower until he meets your ass, and he closes his eyes as he’s once again reminded of how soft humans feel. How soft you feel, as you’re the only one he’s ever touched so lovingly, so carefully. He’s built to tear flesh and to throw people around in Cocytus but he’s happy to just be running his hands around your body like this.

He holds your thighs and he carries you to you room and the smell of your humidifier reminds him of sex. Which is strange, since sex smells like sweat and cum and this, this feels so new. He’s not sure what to do with all that he’s feeling. He’s not supposed to be. Feeling. Feelings. Is it normal to feel so much all at once?

He lays you down gently and you’re looking at him wide-eyed and confused. He kisses you while he unbuttons your blouse and he takes it off of you slowly. He looks hungrily at your black bra but he unclasps it and sets it on the far edge of the bed. What’s happening? What happened to your demon? To your hungry, relentless god of the dead? Where has he gone?

“Have I ever told you how much I have to control myself around you? How careful I have to be because I don’t want to hurt you?” he asks. And no, he’s never told you, but you knew. You saw how carelessly he squeezes metal door handles and dents them. You saw how many ATM machines he’s broken because he just presses the buttons too hard. You saw how naturally strong he is but you’ve also seen how he’s cradled you in his arms at nights when you slept. How softly he runs his hands through your hair when you shower. How he rubbed your back a few moments ago. You never wanted to acknowledge how carefully he treats you because you’re going to fall in love with him if you do.

He’s removed every piece of clothing already, everything still intact, not shredded like they usually end up. He pulls his shirt over his head and kicks off his sweats. Then he kisses you again. And again. And again. He kisses you like kissing naked is what he intended to do.

You push him away and he looks concerned if he’s put too much weight on you or if he was holding your face a little too hard.

“What are you doing?” you ask him, voice full of lust. “Fuck me already.”

He shakes his head and smiles. He knows you’ve fantasized about being made love to. Tonight, he plans on making those fantasies come true.

He pulls you down the mattress and aligns himself to your entrance. He takes his time in teasing your pussy with the tip of his dick and you’re already moaning so much from that alone. You ask him to put it in and he does, but he does so painfully slow. You try to push yourself down on him but he’s holding you and there’s not much you can do. His brows are furrowed and he’s concentrating on how good you feel; how tight you are each time. He draws back when he’s halfway inside and he drives into you fully the second time. He fucks you slow but hard, his lips on yours. He’s making you feel every bit of him and you receive it, you welcome it with the moans and when he plays with your clit they only get louder. He notes that you’re moaning differently this time and maybe he’ll fuck you again like this tomorrow so he can hear them again. Maybe he’ll fuck you like this every night.

He takes you orgasm after orgasm, not once letting you switch how you’re laid down. He likes the control and depth he gets when you’re on all fours but he’s only changing how your legs are spread apart for him right now. Your back has not once left the sheets.

You insist he let you ride him and he obliges. He holds your waist for support and he helps you sink down on him. He tosses his head back in ecstasy and he looks at you with his eyes lidded like you were the most beautiful thing he’s seen. You are the most beautiful thing he’s seen.

His breathing becomes uneven and you quicken your movement. He nods, wordlessly telling you “yes, fuck me just like that.”

When he cums, he holds back the urge to say he loves you. He covers it up with moans and your name. He pulls your forehead to his and he kisses you again, as if saying thank you. He pecks your nose when you move back.

He cleans up while you doze off. He puts his shirt on you when he settles on the bed. He laughs at how tired you get from sex but he’s grateful he gets time alone to think while still in your presence.

Jungkook looks over and attempts to fix your hair while he hoists your head up onto his chest. He fights back several urges, but when he presses a kiss to your cheek he does it. “I love you” slipped off of his tongue like it was the most natural thing he could say.

All he’s going to be thinking about for the rest of the night is how quickly you said you loved him too.

[leelee10898]

Chikara: Zenshin suru (2/?)

Summary:Moving forward. At least thats what Ellie is trying to do. Meanwhile Colt finds trouble back home. Catch up HERE. If you would like added to the tag list, let me know.

Raiting: Mature. This series deals with violence, angst, death, sexual situations and bad choices. Read at your own risk.

Ellie sat up in disbelief oh you have got to be kidding me she flopped back down on the bed. "Oooh come on Ellie, its gonna be so much fun." Ellie rolled her eyes as she was lifted up off the bed. "Seriously Ingrid, how the hell did you end up in here? You had a different roommate." Ellie groaned, could her luck get any worse? A horribly emotional Thanksgiving, and now this, she was convinced someone hated her.

"Well," Ingrid flipped her hair and sat on ellies bed "I put in for a new roommate before Thanksgiving. She was horrible, she used to microwave liver, the dorm smelled like burnt rotten sneakers." She pointed her finger to her throat, making a gagging sound. "So they called with this opening and well,  here I am!" She perked up. "Come on, there's a party tonight in the dorms across the quad, lets go."

"A party? God no. I'm really not in the mood to party, it was a long,  long break and a long flight, you go on without me this time ok. " Ellie refused.

"No can do! I have watched you mope around this campus like a sad little puppy dog. It stops now! Get up, get your ass dressed." Ellie eyed Ingrid in disbelief, was she really going to allow her high school rival boss her around. She stared at Ingrid a moment longer,  arms folded against her chest. "Fiiiiiiine!" She got up and started getting ready. Once she was fully dressed she grabbed Colts jacket and walked out the door.

They walked into the crowded halls of the building across the quad. The music pumping throughout, kegs in many of the rooms and almost everyone had a red solo cup in hand. "Want a beer?" Ingrid tried talking over the loud music. "No. I don't drink." She shouted back, Ingrid shrugged her shoulders "suit yourself."  Ingrid paraded Ellie around, introducing her to so many people. She felt oddly out of place, but if she was going to try and move on, she figured maybe this was a start. What she wouldn't give to have Riya here with her now, but Riya was a little over an hour away at hartfeld. They were standing there talking to some girl Ingrid knew when two guys approached, one with Dark blonde hair, the other a brunette with stunning blue eyes. The girl walked away leaving the two of them, with the two guys.  "Looking good Ingrid." The blonde smirked as he leaned in kissing Ingrid's cheek. "Kyle, this is Ellie. Ellie, kyle." Ellie gave him a shy wave. "Nice to meet you Ellie, this is my friend Nick." Kyle introduced the two.

Ingrid and Kyle were caught up in an intense, flirtatious conversation, leaving Ellie and Nick standing there. "So. You don't look like you want to be here." Nick finally broke the silence. "I'm not really into the whole party scene." She admitted.  "Neither am I, I only came because Kyle wanted to see Ingrid." He chuckled as he stood next to Ellie. "Yeah. Ingrid drug me out. Still getting used to being friends with her, after being rivals for so long."

"Oh, so you two knew each other before college?" He quirked his brow, seemingly interested in having a conversation with her. "Yeah. We went to the same high school. Battled for valedictorian our senior year."

Nick leaned in a little closer.  "And which one of you won it?" His voice low and Intoxicating. She bit her lower lip. Trying to stop the huge grin from spreading across her face. "I bet it was you. You got that smart and beautiful thing going for you." Her face was now beat red. "Beautiful huh?" She tried to even her voice, praying he didn't hear the slight tremor. "I call it how I see it. And you Ellie, are probably the most beautiful woman here." Ellie turned a deep shade of crimson,  it had been a while since anyone flirted with her. She couldn't help but think about Colt, what he was doing in that moment, wondering if he even thought of her at all anymore. Ellie mentally reprimanded herself, she was trying to move on with her life, she needed to stop pretending that she and Colt were anything but a distant memory now. "Hey Nick, wanna dance?" Nick smiled wide "Lets do it."

****

California…

Colt climb off his bike and stashed it, he made his way quickly down the familiar street and ducked in the side through the loose boards. He had been coming to the shop here and there for a few months, ever since the heat from the FBI died down. He hadn't been in a couple weeks, he spent Thanksgiving break with his mom and he was itching to get back to the shop and continue his treasure hunt. He started in the back of the shop, mostly sticking to the private quarters. His pop wasn't like a regular blue collar guy, he didn't use a bank except for the legit auto shop account. Everything else he had was hidden in the shop like In the walls where one or more of his great grandparents installed a fireproof safe, Loose floorboards, hollowed out cabinets with a removable panel. Colt had found the deed to the garage, a copy of Kaneko's will leaving everything to him, the original he was certain in a safe deposit box somewhere, he knew he would have to piece clues together,  it was what his dad did. He also found Several stacks of money, bonds and other property deeds.

He climbed the steps to Logans loft. He had yet to go up there, the bitter taste of Jealousy still thick on his tongue. He hated Logan from the moment he met him, he hated that a pretty boy was his father's prize poodle, he had the nice car,  the good jobs, and he had Ellie eating out of the palm of his hand. He snorted, a smirk forming on his lips when that changed. He swore he could still feel the softness of her lips pressed against his, her arms wrapped tightly around him as they lost themselves in the pacific.

Colt walked through the room, stepping over debris, a gaping hole in the roof letting the moonlight shine in giving him some natural light.

He found a metal box under the burnt bed frame, he had to pry it open, not much inside except a few slips of paper and a flash drive. He checked his phone, 9pm. He had been there longer then he should. He pocketed the flash drive and descend the stairs to the bay. His eyes landed on something glimmering in the moonlight. He reached down to pick up the item,  his heart caught in his chest as he realized what it was.

******

The day he took Ellie to her driving test, he wandered around inside the dmv, waiting for her to finish up. He knew she would pass, she was a natural. A rack of keychains sat displayed in front of him, he fumbled through them until he found the perfect one.

He waited outside as Ellie bounced out of the DMV, a freshly printed license in hand. "I passed, I passed!" She squealed as she threw her arms around Colts neck. "Congratulations. Here I got you something." He held out the silver crown keychain. Ellie looked between him and the key chain, as she took it out of his hand "thank you colt. But why a crown?" Colt shrugged his shoulders, "I'll tell you later, now come on let's get back to the shop."

*******

How did it get here? He knew Ellie had it on her keychain when she left for school, she hadn't been back to the shop after that night, unless. Unless she was there, sometime while he was away. He felt the lump in this throat grow bigger, she was there and he could have seen her. In that moment the need to see her, to feel her in his arms, to hear her voice, taste the sweetness of her lips. It was all too much to bare. He shook the thoughts from his head,  she was at Langston, safely away from the crime ridden streets of LA, it wouldn't be long until he was with her again.

He put the keychain in his pocket, along with the flash drive and headed to where he stashed his bike a few blocks over. He kept looking over his shoulder,  a nagging feeling he was being followed. He got to his stash spot, attempting to quickly climb on his bike and start it and thats when he hit him. Colt crashed to the ground with a thud, his bike coming with him. He had just enough time to roll as his attacker came down on him with a knife. He sprang to his feet, adrenaline coursing through him. His assailant charged forward, colt side stepping, grabbing the attacker by the arm, bringing his elbow down on his shoulder,  the knife hitting the ground with a clatter.

The man clutched his shoulder, crying out in pain. "Wrong choice buddy. Guess you don't know who I am?" Colt spat as the man turned, baring a rage filled face. "I don't ask names, I do what im told." He circled Colt, looking for his opening when his fist connected hard with Colts jaw. The attacker grabbed the knife, as colt lunged forward, tackling him to the ground. Colts first landing blow after blow, the man lifted his hand, slicing into colts side. Fuck! Colt screamed out in pain, it only fueled his rage further as he screamed "Who sent you?" he screamed as he twisted his body bringing the mans arm behind him,incapacitating him. "Arg, not going. To tell you." Colt shook his head as he pulled his arm further behind him. "Ahhh. Wallace. His names wallace." Satisfied colt released his hold on the man, shoving him to the ground. "Of course he didnt give you a fucking name. The little bitch. He knew you'd never fucking do it." Colt circled the man, stalking him like a lion and he was his prey. The man looked up at him confused, A devious smirk played on his lips, "the names Kaneko." He let the name set in. "I'm thinking the letters M.P.C are flashing in your mind right now aren't they?"  The man sat there, paralyzed in fear. "Now, you run and tell all your friends, that MPC still runs things." The man nodded his head and took off.

Colt clutched his side,  the realization that he was hurt crashing down on him at once. He hopped on his bike, flying down the highway to the only place he could think to go.

He pulled up to a small house in a backwoods California town, Killed the engine and walked to the house. He reached the door, banging harder than necessary. "Colt. What the hell are you doing here?" The voice spoke through the latched door. "I know. I'm sorry but, its an emergency." He pulled his blood covered hand from his side. "I need your help."

Permatag

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ROD

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[faefictions]

The Kids From Yesterday | 2

Pairing: Harrison Osterfield x Reader

Word Count: 2,940

Summary: roadtrip au

Tags: 

@smilexcaptainx @artsycth @rose-marys-love @chonisberonica @5sos-wdw @chloe-geoghegan1 @spiderlingsweb @embrace-themagic  @staringmoony @fanficparker @eyesinconsellations @otheenglishsetters

(let me know if you would like to be tagged when I update!)

 The next morning, you woke up with a headache. You didn’t remember coming back to the hotel the night before, but you did remember having the time of your life with your friends at the bar. 

The rest of the boys were awake and watching something on television. Harrison was sitting up in bed next to you, and the second you saw him, you knew he didn’t get much sleep. The bags under his eyes were darker than you had seen them in a long time, but your worry melted away when his smile crinkled up his under-eyes. 

“Good morning, sleepyhead,” he said. You groaned in response and pulled the sheets over your head to shield your eyes from the sunlight. 

Tom had called for room service and ordered everyone breakfast. You were lucky enough to wake up a few minutes before it got there. 

After you were all finished eating, you packed up your few belongings and brought them to the car to finish the drive to your new apartment. The dread in your stomach made you move slowly, but you knew that no matter how slow you took your steps, you would be in Adam’s arms by nightfall. 

As you waited for the rest of the boys to finish bringing their things to the car, Harrison pulled you aside. 

“Hey, you don’t happen to remember the walk home last night, do you?”

“Oh god, what did I do?”

“Nothing,” he chuckled.

“You wouldn’t have asked if it was nothing.”

“You got me there. It was nothing though, you just got a little upset and I carried you home. You wouldn’t tell me what was going on though, so I was just going to ask if there was something you wanted to talk about.”

He of course was lying, but he wanted to present the chance for you to tell him about your feelings about the move and Adam while you were sober. 

“Oh, well that’s not as bad as you led me to think. But I’m sure I was just emotional drunk. You know how I can get,” You lied right back. 

You knew exactly why you had been upset. You thanked your brain for not letting the truth slip through your loose, intoxicated lips. The last thing you wanted was to let anyone know about that dread in the last stretch. 

Harrison just sadly nodded at your reply and went to grab his belongings. You were too focused on the fact that you had almost blew it to notice his change in demeanor. 

The five of you made your way into the car and set off. The atmosphere felt a lot heavier than the day before. The windows were still down, and the music was just as loud, but no one was singing along anymore. 

Each of you were secretly praying for some kind of halt to the journey. None of you wanted to let go. 

The boys had one more stop planned, and that helped them cheer up a little. It was initially Harry’s idea to ask you to model for him one last time back home. He was going to bring you to one of the spots that he had always wanted to shoot, but the other boys talked him out of it. They said that they would find a better spot along their route for him to stop and take pictures of you. They had said that if he didn’t approve of the spot beforehand, then they would forget about it and he could go on with his original plan, but the second he saw what they had found, he forgot his plan altogether. 

When the car pulled over to the side of the road, you were looking down at your phone. Adam had been texting you all morning, sending you photos of your apartment and asking when you thought you were going to arrive. You, of course, hadn’t had the heart to reply. You were doing your best to pretend like the move wasn’t happening. When you felt the car jerk to a stop, you finally looked up, and the sight before you was enough to make you gasp out an “Oh my god”. You had pulled up to a large field of flowers that stretched farther than you could see in almost every direction. The flowers were all bright and sectioned off in blocks by color. It was a rainbow like you had never seen. 

“You like it?” one of the boys asked, but you were too amazed to respond. Sam got out of the car, allowing you to crawl out as well. You didn’t wait for anyone else as you approached the field. You were too enamored with the sight of the field to notice the boys behind you. Tom was taking full credit for finding the field while Sam helped Harry find all of the equipment that he had packed into the back of the car for this moment. Harrison, however, was busy looking at you. He knew you were too busy admiring the field to turn around and catch him staring, so he let himself truly soak you in. Your smile and wide eyes made his heart swell. The night before, he was happy to see you having a good time again, but he had never seen you this excited about anything. He had to force himself to look away when you shot around and ran back to them. 

You were rapid firing questions to all of them, asking how they had found this place, what you were doing there, and how long you could stay. Tom ended up trying to answer all of your questions, but when he told you that they had brought you there to model for Harry, you attention turned to your former roommate. 

“You should have told me, dipshit! I would have worn something better than this,” you exclaimed, gesturing towards your casual shorts and t-shirt. 

“Y/n, we literally have your entire wardrobe packed into the back of the car, you are perfectly capable of changing in the backseat.”

“I hate you,” you chuckled, but wrapped Harry in a hug anyway. You were too happy to hate him. 

You searched for one of your bags while the boys helped Harry find his camera bag. You found both bags at the same time, and as you searched for the dress you wanted to wear, Harry ventured off to find the spots with the best lighting and angles. 

You jumped into the backseat and changed from your shorts and shirt into the sundress. Luckily the windows were tinted, so if anyone was around, they weren’t able to see you change through the windows, not that anyone was around anyway. 

You exited the back seat and made sure your dress looked fine before you caught up with the rest of the group. Harry was quick to guide you to the first spot he had chosen, and Sam took the role of his grip, making sure reflectors were in place to get the best shot. 

You hadn’t had any experience with real modeling, but that didn’t stop Harry from using you as one of his go to models. That was how you had initially gotten closer to Harrison. You had met him a few times through Tom, but you hadn’t spent any real time with him until the first photoshoot that Harry asked you and Harrison to do for him. That was also the first time you really realized how handsome Harrison was. Of course he was dressed for a photoshoot, and his poses were helping his appeal, but for a few months after that first shoot, you had to hide how flustered he would make you each time he would come around. 

Little did you know, Harrison was thinking about that first shoot as he watched you dance around in the flowers. He fell for you just as you had fallen for him. He had always thought you were adorable, but he didn’t realize how beautiful he thought you were until that first shoot. You were wearing the same dress in that field as you did in that first shoot, and it made him wish he could go back in time. He tried to remain in the moment, he tried to keep a smile on his face, but watching you made him wish that he had gotten a chance with you before you had fallen for Adam. He knew there was nothing he could do about it anymore, but he wanted nothing more than to belong to you. 

The five of you spent a couple hours in the fields of flowers. You had gotten tired of modeling, but Harry wanted to get some shots of just the flowers. 

After the second hour, it was evident how exhausted everyone was, but no one would admit it. Once you were done with that stop, there was nothing else between you and your new home. The dread of the inevitable wasn’t enough to keep you there forever though. As the sun began to get lower in the sky, Tom had reluctantly suggested that you guys head back to the car. You still had to unpack all of your things from the car into the apartment, and the boys were going to try to make the entire drive back over night, although you had insisted that they just stay the night with you. 

Dejectedly, you all made your way back to the car. Harry’s bags were stuffed back into their place, and you all packed into the car. Once you all had your seatbelts on, Harrison started the car, or tried to at least. The engine made a pathetic whirring sound, but it wouldn’t turn over. 

Harrison cursed under his breath and continued to try for another minute, but the sounds just keep getting worse. “Want me to call a tow truck?” you asked from the backseat. Harrison didn’t want to admit defeat, but his frustration was rising. He tried to start it one more time, and you put your hand on his arm to tell him to not worry about it. He melted a little into your touch, but you suddenly had a great idea and your touch disappeared as your arm shot away from him in excitement. 

“Everyone out,” you commanded with a huge smile on your face. Tension and annoyance were still heavy in the atmosphere, but you weren’t going to let it stay that way. Once you were able to get out of the door, you went around to the back of the car and grabbed your picnic blanket and spread it out on a patch of grass. 

“I’ll call for a tow truck in a second, but first, we appreciate nature.”

“Y/n, that’s what we’ve been doing for the past 3 hours,” Harry sighed.

“No, we’ve been walking through a field for 3 hours, but now we’re going to sit, there’s a difference you div.”

The boys all sat on the blanket as you instructed and faced the field. It wasn’t late enough to watch a sunset, but the sun was low enough in the sky to turn the atmosphere golden around the flowers. It was beautiful, and you wouldn’t have been able to see it while in the field. You had to take a step back to really admire it. 

You sat in-between Harry and Harrison, resting your head on Harrison’s shoulder as you admired the flowers. You decided to pull out your phone and call the truck so you weren’t stuck there for too long. You grabbed your phone out of your pocket, and your stomach churned at the sight of the notifications on your screen. There were 6 missed calls from Adam and 15 texts. He was never like that, but from the looks of the last few texts, you knew it wasn’t an emergency so you ignored it. 

Harrison had seen your notifications as well, and was surprised to see you ignore them and carry on to search for the number for a tow truck like Adam didn’t exist. It wasn’t like you to ignore someone like that, especially not your boyfriend. He had been worried about you since the interaction the night before, and this didn’t help that. He knew something really had to be wrong for you to flat out ignore him. 

When you called for the tow truck, they said they would be there in 15 minutes, and that they were going to send out a second truck so they could bring everyone to the shop. After you told the boys, the rest of the wait was spent in silence, admiring the field in front of you. 

When the trucks arrived, you watched as they hitched Harrison’s car before you got into one of the trucks with Harry. Within 15 minutes, you were sat in the shop as they worked on the car. They said it would be an easy fix and you should be out of there in an hour or two. 

This had been the delay that you had been hoping for, there was no way you were going to be able to make it to Adam that night. You were going to be with your friends for one more night, and you had never been more thankful for a shitty car. 

The five of you sat waiting, making terrible jokes to pass the time. Tom had found a hotel not far from the shop for you guys to stay the night, but you had forgotten to inform Adam of the delay. It would have completely escaped your mind if he hadn’t have called while you were sitting there. 

Your phone began to buzz in your lap, and you ignored it on instinct, but Harrison noticed. 

“Your phone’s ringing,” he pointed out, making you snap into reality. You looked down to see Adam’s contact information on the screen. Now that someone else’s attention was on it, you couldn’t exactly ignore the call, so you cursed under your breath before you excused yourself to take the call outside. 

“Where are you? I’ve been calling for hours,” Adam began, worriedly without so much as a hello as soon as you hit the answer button.

“Hey, Adam, sorry. The car broke down and we’re in the shop right now. I don’t think we’re going to make it tonight.”

“Well, I could come get you. Just need to tell me where you are.”

“That’s really not necessary. I can just finish the drive tomorrow.”

“Will you though?”

His voice suddenly sounded colder than you had ever heard it, more accusing than you had ever been spoken to. It caught you completely off-guard. 

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, is this really about the car?”

“What do you want me to walk the rest of the way?”

“Picking you up would be no hassle, so why don’t you want me to?”

“Adam, all I’m saying is that there was an unexpected delay. One night isn’t the end of the world.”

“First it was the lease, then it was this idiotic road trip with your idiot friends, now it’s the car, so what is it going to be tomorrow? Are you going to get lost in town? You’re putting off coming, y/n.”

“And why would I be doing that?”

You knew he was right, but there was no way you were going to let him have that satisfaction. 

“I don’t know, why don’t you tell me.”

“It’s not what I’m doing, so I couldn’t tell you.”

“Whatever, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

With that, Adam hung up. He had never done so without saying he loved you first. That wasn’t what upset you most though. He had never liked your friends, but he had never insulted them. He had suggested you not do certain things with them, or to stay with him instead of going out with them some nights, but he had never called them idiots. And the fact that he was accusing you of not wanting to come upset you too, although deep down, you knew he was right. You were ready to angry cry, but before you could even react to the phone call, Harrison opened the door behind you. 

“Hey, everything alright?”

He had seen your facial expression through the window while the rest of the boys were distracted, and he almost wished he hadn’t looked. You looked broken, and he couldn’t stay put. It took all of his strength to not run out and hug you. Instead, he calmly made his way out to check on you. 

“Everything’s fine, why?”

“You, uhm, looked pretty upset on the phone.”

“Oh, that. Yeah, Adam is just a little annoyed that I won’t be there tonight, but it’s not a big deal.”

He nodded, but you didn’t see because you were doing your best to avoid eye contact. You were afraid you would cry if you looked up, and the last thing you wanted in that moment was for Harrison to see you cry. 

“Do you need a hug?” he asked, still not convinced that anything was ok in the moment. 

“I don’t need one, but I could never pass up a hug from you,” you giggled. He smiled and wrapped you in the tightest hug he could muster. He was less worried with you in his arms. 

In that moment, he decided that he wasn’t going to waste one more second of what little time he had left with you. He came up with a plan on how to make it a night you would never forget. You both needed it. 

[hisgirlwonder]

One Shot - Seeing Red

Length: 3k words Warning: N/A Synopsis: Michael has risen to power, with followers and power galore, only for you to get in the way and knock him back down to earth with your own revelation. Notes: Y/n is sixteen and Michael is seventeen when they meet at co-ed witches/warlocks school. Mostly reminiscing on the past and where things went wrong and then it jumps to present day, before the Outpost is created. They’ve been together for around ten years (y/n ends up being 26 and Michael is 27) before all of this stuff happens. I hope you guys enjoy! Not sure if I’ll make a second part yet but we’ll see. PS NO SMUT before anyone gets offended because I will not write any smut about Michael when he’s under 18. PPS. y/n has a rage at Michael because he’s mean in the story, fyi~

It was almost as if it happened yesterday. The memories were so vivid, so clear; you could even remember the perfume you were wearing. But nothing was as strong as the way his presence hit you. You never saw him coming and yet he was a surprise that you welcomed with open arms.

-

You were parked up on a bench at school, eyes glued to the book in your hand; Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, your favourite – you believed that Lewis Carroll was in a league all of his own. Upon discovering Alice and her world, you longed for the day when you’d fall down your own rabbit hole, away from this place. Sure, the school was full of your “kind” but they weren’t your kind. You were teased and mocked for being a dreamer but always knew one day you’d teach them all.

The next thing you know, a blue-eyed angel crashes into you, and sends your beloved book flying. Most boys by this point would have frustrated you for interrupting, but not him; not Michael Langdon. Warmth and kindness seeped through every pore on his body – his presence was close enough to intoxicating. He picks up the book for you and stutters out an apology; admitting that it wasn’t his finest moment, being more focused on the drum solo in his ears than on where his feet were leading him.

He compliments you on your choice in shoes (Doc Martens, 14 eyelet, with giant red roses on them - roses, you’d come to learn, were his favourite flower) and you blushed because when you first bought them your mother criticised you to no end; yes, you were a witch, but to her you should be wearing pink dresses with bows in your hair and pearls around your neck. She envisioned you a la Good Witch of the North and not Nancy Downs.

Michael was a special child who showed so much hope and promise; possessing limitless talent as a Warlock and serving as a beacon of light for those around him. He naturally was the class clown and would do anything for attention but what he really wanted deep down was someone to love; craving the hole in his heart to be filled but he never found it. Not until you came along, at least. He didn’t trust you completely for a while but that’s what a life time of hurt and abandonment will do that to someone. Once he did, on the other hand, that was another story. He finally had a place to make a home.

-

From this moment on the two of you were inseparable; where you went he went, and vice versa. You suddenly changed from “The one who blended in with the walls” to “The one who stuck out like a sore thumb.”  Death stares were abundant from all of the girls who wanted Michael to be their arm candy. He would laugh their proposals off because he possessed a special gift – reading into a person’s soul. He could see their deepest, and sometimes darkest, desires. “They only want me because I look pretty,” he’d joke, “They probably don’t realise that I’m useless in many other ways.”

When you weren’t receiving almost murderous stares then you’d receive ones in admiration. Others knew what Michael had been through with losing his family and revelled in your pairing. You were patient, kind, loving, and gentle; everything the Boy Wonder needed. Many people bet that the two of you would last forever. You did too…. up until three months ago.

This was the time that Ms. Mead, the first woman Michael ever loved, was killed. It destroyed him from the inside out. Over time, he slowly but surely was losing his light - he became closed off and his began to harden.

With no idea where the person you loved so dearly had disappeared to you were just about to lose faith. His return seemed unlikely and your bones ached from loneliness; he was in front of you like a hologram but it was all empty. Your heart longed for a reprieve because you couldn’t bear it anymore and, suddenly, the Universe spoke to you in the most unlikely of ways.

Michael disappeared for weeks, without a trace, nowhere to be found. You had no idea whether he had died or just given up on you, given up on life. By the third week, you accepted that this might have been it. Your heart broke, over and over, at the idea of a life without seeing those blue-eyes you fell in love with as a teenager ever again.

This was the way the Universe spoke to you. It was a message you didn’t want to receive.

-

Two months pass and one night, out of the blue, you get a phone call from a familiar voice. You would recognise it everywhere. It’s Michael.

He rattles off an address, wanting you to come to where he was, and says he’ll explain everything; it would all make sense in time. You didn’t know whether to be angry with him for deserting everything or happy that he was still alive.

The drive to this mysterious location felt like it lasted for years. Your stomach was in knots the whole way there from anxiety but when you saw him again, it all went away in an instant. You wept like a mother seeing her child for the first time. The tears met your cheeks like old friends saying hello; reminding your heart that it still felt, no matter how much you tried to close it off.

Your mood switched from overcome with gratitude at the sight of him to anger – your voice was cold but laced with hurt undertones, demanding answers only he could give. Why had he left? Where did he go? What did he do? The explanation you got from him wasn’t what you expected but you tried to understand anyway.

Michael explained that Mead’s death left him feeling lost so he isolated himself from everything and tried to find who he was. He wasn’t sure if he would but he did and ended up coming back with more than he’d bargained for. Something spoke to him and lead him to discovering who his father was and his purpose in life. Apparently Mead knew all along and was waiting until she felt he was ready to bring it up. Her calendar was marked for his eighteenth birthday as the day of revelation but as you knew, she didn’t make it. Mead was directed by his father to watch over him, to guide him to his rightful place and fulfil the task that had been laid out for him.

At the lowest point of the journey, he stumbled upon a place full of people who were searching for him; your Michael. They were a congregation that apparently were led by his father too. This is where the other surprise kicks in; the place where the two of you stood was a company by day that created Mead 2.0 from the memories Michael kept inside his brain.

One of the followers took a liking to Michael and gave him roof over his head in exchange for some of his time and a “good word” with his father. They conversed about everything and this is where she learned how she could help him – by taking him to those who could help recreate his beloved Mead.

The words stung because you have no idea whether or not he included you, but you let it go. You didn’t question things because you’d had enough.

-

That night, the two of you spent the night becoming reacquainted with each other’s bodies - he felt warm, and familiar, and right, but at the same time something in Michael had changed. You couldn’t put your finger on it but, nevertheless, it scared you. You’d never seen Michael like this before; like a bomb had gone off inside him and set fire to his soul. It was a different kind of passion to how he was with you; it teetered towards the dark side.

His kisses felt sharp and pierced through your core; your powers were screaming at you to pay attention but you tried to shrug it off. You just wanted to melt away in his arms, forgetting all you had learned for just an hour or two.

He became obsessed with his new found influence, the followers he had gained, and the purpose he had discovered. Your relationship took a back burner despite once being the only thing that once mattered. You’d lost him again except this time he was right in front of you, oblivious to it all. He was fading away before your eyes yet there one hundred percent.

// PRESENT DAY //

The days turned into weeks and you were late; it wasn’t surprising, the stress you were under took a toll on your body. You knew eventually it would come but you figured you’d take a test just to be certain and to put your mind to rest.

Your head pops into the office and Michael is in a meeting with a few members of The Co-Operative; a bunch of people who you knew very little about except the fact they were stealing your Michael away from you. Despite everything, you still tried to remain open but it eventually wore you down.

You tell him, “Babe, I’m just going to go and pop to the store. I, uh, need to pick up some stuff.” But it falls on deaf ears; he doesn’t register but this was nothing out of the ordinary for you; this was the new normal. Work came first and you were just made to suffer in silence.

-

On the drive to the chemist, you consider leaving like he did that night but you know that’s not the solution. You wouldn’t stoop to his level no matter how angry or upset you became. Once you’re there, you buy three different tests just to be sure and sit outside on the bench to soak up some mid-afternoon sunshine.

“Mikey would have loved this,” you think to yourself. Mikey was your Michael; the boy who would have climbed mountains and swam oceans for you. This new person, Langdon, is someone who you didn’t recognise. The tears well up in your eyes and you could feel your heart breaking all over again. Looking up to the sky, you ask, “What am I meant to do if I’m with child to someone who doesn’t even want to know me?”

Your mind mulls over the list “what if’s” you’d tucked away.

What if you are pregnant and Michael wants nothing to do with the baby? What if Michael decides he wants nothing to do with you? What happens if he’s kept you around as part of his plan that’s unfolding?

-

As you walked past the office, you notice Michael was finished with his meeting and now, presumably, writing notes on his computer. You didn’t dare disturb him because there was no need to get in an argument about what was going on yet again.

You tip toe up to the bathroom, bag of tests in one hand and the other running over the balustrade. You couldn’t help but contemplate as to which was worse - a pregnancy from a man who made you feel invisible or to live without Michael.

Sitting down on the toilet and the thoughts in your mind change into “If I am pregnant, I will love this baby regardless.” You wouldn’t give up on this child, no matter if the father abandoned you.

After peeing on all three sticks and setting a timer, you sit and wait on the toilet; your face is in your hands and at this point you wanted the world to swallow you whole.  Five minutes pass, feeling almost like an eternity. “Fuck,” you mouthed silently when you check the results; your reaction immediately telling you this isn’t what you had hoped for. You weren’t even sure what you were hoping for in general. You just knew that facing Michael and his wrath was unfortunately necessary and not avoidable at all.

You drag yourself back down the stairs. Your entire body and existence felt like it was currently being weighed down by cement.  

-

Knocking three times upon the office door with shaky hands, you become full of dread when you hear Michael calls for you to come in.

When you enter, you’re greeted with, “Y/n, what is it? That was fairly important but I’ve told them I’ll call them back. I hope this is worth me wasting their time and not some rouse to get attention,”

You’re pacing, unable to form a sentence or think straight. His tone of voice didn’t make anything easier.

“Well?” Michael asks, gesturing with his hands for you to spit it out. “Are you going to say anything or can I just write this off as you being childish again?”

That was all it took for you to lose your cool; it was one thing for him to be stressed and tired but accusing you of things that weren’t true? That was another story. “Michael, for crying out loud, listen to yourself. Where is the man I’ve spent the last 10 years loving? Where is the Michael who would know something was wrong and wouldn’t accuse me of being childish?”

Michael lifts his arms up, pointing them at himself, “I hate to break it to you, y/n, but he’s right here. I’ve evolved past what life once held for me.”

You move from your position and walk over to his desk, blood boiling in your veins. It had all been leading up to now and there was no way to hold it back. You hit your hands down on his desk to get his attention for once. “Really, Michael? Because usually evolution is good for more than just the selfish asshole who is claiming he’s better than everyone else.”

Michael huffs at your remark, “That’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying that-“

You cut him off; unable to tolerate any more of his excuses. “Then what am I? Where do I fit in? I have done nothing but support you and love you through all of this. You forget you’re the one who disappeared on me yet I’m the one who has been picking up the god damn pieces from the things you broke. Have I evolved? Maybe I have because this is some other level bullshit.”

If there was one thing you were good at, it was with your words. That struck Michael with a lot force but he didn’t let it show. His guard was still up, refusing to acknowledge what you were saying, pushing him in the other direction. He groans, “You don’t understand. This is for our future. Everything I’m doing is for our future.”

“I don’t understand? I don’t understand? Huh, that’s really funny. Because all you’ve been doing is shutting me out ever since you found your ‘calling’. I didn’t give a fuck where you came from or questioned it because I loved you regardless. I loved you when you had nobody, Michael! The second you gain followers who you think love you but really only love this title you’ve acquired then what? I once thought you hung the stars in the sky, Michael Langdon. Now I can see that was a lie.”

You throw the bag of tests at him, “How’s that for our future? I bet this fits in just great with your plans, Langdon.” You storm out of the office and the house to get some fresh air. You couldn’t believe what had just come out of your mouth but you knew it had to be said.

-

Michael runs out to you, test in hand and questioning what he was looking at, “Y/n, wait, You’re pregnant?”  

You don’t bother to turn around at the sound of his voice; refusing to look at him at that moment. At this point you’re hurt beyond belief. “Yes, Michael. I’m pregnant.”

He walks around so you have no choice but to see him and that stupid blonde hair of his you loved so much; once a curly mop upon his head, now transformed into long lengths of golden silk. He squats down in front, balancing himself with one hand on the step below. It was the first time you’d felt like equals in a long time. “I’m going to be a dad?” He asks, the worry in his voice was apparent.

With arms folded, you look down at him and roll your eyes. Still sniffing from your overflow of emotions. “Yes, Einstein. Who else?”

He rises from the squat, hands run up and down the sides of his face, trying to counteract the shock he was feeling, meeting together at his chin. He looks like a deer in headlights, trying to process what this all meant. “We’re going to have a f-f-family?”

He could barely say the f word without it being a struggle. Michael never thought he’d see the day when he was going to have a child of his own. It started out as “when the time is right, we’ll try for one” and ended up becoming an echo down a hallway. After someone to love, this is what Michael wanted most. He wanted a son or a daughter to carry when their legs got tired, to be there for, to kiss their knees better they fell down. All of the things he never received as a child.

You shot up from the seat you’re sitting on, snapping at him, “Christ. Yes, Michael. What don’t you understand?”

He doesn’t move a muscle or say anything and is just staring blankly into the distance. That’s when it hits him like a ton of bricks; realising the extent of what’s happened and what’s to come.

Taglist: @sensitivethot @avesatanormalpeoplescareme @sammythankyou

[sugarless-suki-writes]

Big God

Fandom: Inuyasha Rating: M Word Count: 8,537 Chapters: 7 of ?

Read on FF||Ao3

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Chapter Seven: Pretending

Kagome let out a groan, more of a whine really, as she pleaded for Sango to just stop. She had taken care of all her things she needed to do earlier in the day; i.e. bathing, making her skin as smooth as a dolphin, eating lunch, etc. Now, she just needed help with her outfit and here Sango, her supposed best friend, was berating and teasing her, and has been for the past hour. As soon as Kagome had stepped out of the shower and dried off, she had messaged Sango to make sure Miroku wasn’t around before Facetiming her. And that’s when it had begun…

“Look Kagome, all I’m saying is that I’m hurt you hadn’t told me sooner.”

“Well, I wasn’t sure it was going to go anywhere beforehand!” she defended, rummaging through her dresser. Her phone was propped up on her nightstand.

“Seriously? You expect me to believe that? Don’t you realize what the gifts mean?”

Kagome stilled for a moment as she thought about it. Her cheeks turned pink. “Not… 100% no…” She heard Sango sigh and she turned her head to look up at her phone, seeing that her friend had her head in her hand.

“It’s how wolf youkai start their courtship. How do you not remember this? We learned this in high school!”

Kagome’s cheeks darkened. “Look, high school was a looooong time ago!”

“Not long enough for you to forget!”

“Well we all can’t have slayer training like some people!” she snapped back. Sango rolled her eyes and that’s where the conversation ended. Kagome stood up, huffy, and moved over to her closet, dragging her phone along with her and propping it up. “Let’s just get back to the task at hand, shall we?”

“Yeah, alright. So, what are you going for here?”

The miko shrugged. “I dunno.. I just… wanna look really good, okay? But not like… too… good?” She threw her hands in the air then and made an unintelligible noise. Thankfully, Sango was well-versed in Kagomenese and understood what she meant.

“Yeah, alright. How about going through your dresses? You haven’t worn any in a while. I’m sure it’ll be a nice change from pants. Plus, it’s a little warmer, so you won’t have to put on tights, like you would a skirt.” Kagome nodded, taking in Sango’s wealth of information. She then went back over to her closet and opened it. As she was rummaging around, she heard Sango speak up from behind her. “Hey Kagome… may I ask why you’re wearing your sexy underwear?”

Kagome’s cheeks turned bright red and her body felt hot. She quickly turned around and hid her hands behind her back. “Wha.. I don’t.. What are you talking about?”

“Oh, I think you know. You sly little minx, you just wanna jump right into it don’t you? I didn’t know it was like that.” Sango had a smirk on her face that could rival Miroku’s lecherous one. Kagome suddenly had the thought that she was hanging around him too much… Sure, they may be married, but a little time apart wouldn’t hurt.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Mhmmmmmm…”

“Look!” she pointed an accusing finger at Sango, making sure to aim for where the camera was so it would translate to her pointing in her face on Sango’s end. However, her confidence didn’t last long.. “I.. You.. Wha… S.. Okay, but you always say to be prepared for anything and to always wear your cute underwear!” she said, trying to defend herself. Sango was practically cackling now. “Sh-Shut up!” With that, Kagome turned away, flashing her ass at her best friend once again as she ransacked her closet.

Once Sango’s laughter finally died down, she set about trying to help her. “So, are you sure you wanna do the thong?”

Kagome’s cheeks darkened once more. She wasn’t sure why she was so embarrassed, she and Sango talked about underwear all the time, and the slayer had seen her naked on more than one occasion. “Well, they’re just comfortable to wear in dresses..” she provided, a bit meekly.

“Well what about your pair that’s completely lace? I say, if you’re gonna go all out then go all out.” Kagome considered this for a moment as she was squatting on the floor looking for shoes. She tapped her finger against her chin. That pair had always come in handy for her… The lace was floral in design but scalloped around the edge, so it framed her but nicely and left a bit of skin uncovered. She had taken nudes in it once before and it never failed to send whatever lover she had at the time absolutely reeling. It was a 100% guaranteed knock out. “Lace is also quite comfortable to wear underneath a dress.” Sango said.

Kagome turned her head around, looking up at her phone on the nightstand. “You are incorrigible.”

“I’m only trying to help, Kagome.”

The miko rolled her eyes and continued to rummage through her closet. Despite the attitude she was giving Sango, Kagome soon walked over to her dresser and changed her underwear. Sango cheered and Kagome almost stopped the call.

The two continued to whittle away at Kagome’s options until they finally decided on a navy-blue dress. It was form fitting at the top with a small stripe of lace that ran across her chest and shoulders. The skirt went down to her knees and there was another band of floral lace that skated near the edge of the skirt. Kagome gave a little twirl in front of her mirror, and also Sango.

“Now, how are you going to do your hair? And are you going with makeup or no makeup?”

Kagome hummed in thought. “I think I’m just going to keep my hair simple, maybe help bring out the curl? And yes, makeup, always!” she replied, the last part uttered with an obvious tone and accentuated with a roll of her eyes. Sango simply laughed. The miko then picked up her phone and dragged her best friend into the bathroom with her. They chatted idly as Kagome applied her makeup. Sango asked questions about her date, and Kagome gave answers the best she could.

She wasn’t sure where they were going, but from what she knew about Kouga, and from what Sango told her about wolf youkai, it was going to be extravagant. And if not extravagant, then it was most definitely going to be a hearty meal. Given his profession, he likely had money as well... Kagome kept Kouga’s “work” under wraps, simply telling Sango she wasn’t sure what he did for a living.

Before long, Kagome was all ready and saying her goodbyes to Sango. “I’ll text you when I get home and let you know how the date went.”

“Alright. If you don’t text, I’m going to make assumptions.” she replied, waggling her eyebrows.

Kagome’s cheeks were burning. “Goodbye Sango!”

The slayer was cackling once again. “Goodbye Kagome, have fun!”

And with that, the call was ended. All Kagome had to do now was wait until 6 o’clock. Thankfully, she wouldn’t have to wait too long, as it was 5:46 right now. Kagome was simply putzing around, collecting the few things she had left to collect. She made sure to put the lipstick she was using into her purse, along with her wallet. She wandered back into her room, grabbing a creme colored cardigan to bring with her, just in case she needed it.

She had to resist the urge to chew on her lip as she looked down at her phone, plopping down onto her couch. She and Kouga hadn’t texted all day. She appreciated him allowing her to rest and get ready, but now she was feeling a bit anxious.

5:51

Nine more minutes.

Gods, she was going to die. She needed to find something to distract herself with.. but what? She had no clue... She checked her phone again.

5:52

This was torture. Why couldn’t he show up early? Did he really have to come on time? She let out a sigh and fully unlocked her phone, going to one of her social media apps and just started scrolling. That usually killed time pretty quickly... Thankfully, it seemed to work, as in what felt like no time at all, she heard a knock at her door. A quick look at the time showed that it was 6:00 on the dot. She rolled her eyes before she stood up, walking towards the door, unlocking and opening it.

She was greeted by the sight of the man who was driving her seven kinds of crazy. He was dressed in a pair of black pants, a light blue button up and, of course, his black leather jacket. She drank him in as his eyes roamed over her. She could feel him staring at every inch of her and she had to resist the urge to squeeze her thighs together.

Kouga chewed at the inside of his cheek. She was stunning, and just one look at her had him weak. He wanted nothing more than to cancel their plans and just spend the night in her apartment, doing unspeakable things. His wolf was anxious, pushing him to take her, claim her now, mate her. Kouga kept himself in check, repeating to himself that these things would happen in due time. He needed to be patient.

Her scent was intoxicating, a wonderfully spicy scent mixing in with her natural one. He wanted to move closer, inspect the change in scent more, however he soon caught her eyes and saw the flush on her cheeks. He grinned and watched as her blush darkened, a small smile working its way onto her face as well.

“Well.. you certainly seem casual. I thought this was a date.” she teased, poking his chest delicately with her index finger.

“I thought I didn’t need to impress you.” he fired back.

Kagome rolled her eyes, a laugh bubbling in her chest and causing her shoulders to shake slightly. She looked at him through her lashes and somehow, somehow Kouga was even more of a goner than he was before. “So, where are we going tonight?”

Nowhere. Staying here. Who needs food? Despite all the things he wanted to say, and being egged on by his beast, Kouga managed to push them down and get out the actual plans for the night, the premade plans. If Kouga hadn’t already had things set up for them, he wasn’t sure he would be able to leave her apartment right now. “We’re going to this place I know. It’s small, not really fancy, but the food is good and definitely worth it.” he said.

She nodded and turned away from him to grab her shoes, a pair of black heels that she had hidden behind the door. Kouga watched as she put them on, licking his lips as she completed her look. She was just trying to absolutely destroy him tonight, wasn’t she?

Once she was done, she adjusted the strap of her purse and stepped out of her apartment, Kouga moving out of her way and standing slightly off to the side. He watched as she locked everything up and then turned to him once more, greeting him with a bright cheery smile. He couldn’t help but smile back.

-BG-

It was a bit of a trek, but nothing too terrible and definitely not enough for Kagome to regret wearing heels. They had turned into an alleyway and stopped in front of a small store front. There was a sliding door and the sign outside simply said “Sushi”. Well, at least she now knew what they were going to be eating. While the restaurant itself may not be extravagant, she had a feeling the food would be, otherwise Kouga wouldn’t have brought her here.

She was pulled out of her thoughts as Kouga opened the door for her. She smiled up at him and stepped inside. The inside of the restaurant was fairly small, but there was a bit more seating than she thought there would be, most of it being at the bar. They picked a spot and sat down and as they settled in, Kagome took time to look around the restaurant. The inside was simple as well; the lighting was soft and somewhat romantic, and as for decorations, there wasn’t much. There were a couple plants here and there, and there were some family photos on the walls. On one wall, were several pictures of patrons. She was surprised there wasn’t a photo of Kouga up there, but then again, maybe he didn’t want a photo.. given the fact he was a member of the yakuza.

Kagome turned back around to face the menu that was posted behind the chef. She hummed softly to herself as she considered her options. Some water was handed to them, and they both thanked him. As Kagome contemplated her options, Kouga watched her, a warm smile on his face. “You know you can get whatever you want, right?”

She turned to look at him, a light pink staining her cheeks. “I.. I realize. There’s just a lot of options..” she replied. She was having a hard time deciding what kind of sushi she wanted. She loved octopus and mackerel, both things she hasn’t had in a while. However, she also absolutely loved salmon. Looking at the fish in the case didn’t help matters either; everything looked so fresh and delicious. Maybe... maybe she should just get a chef’s choice platter... Yeah that might be for the best.

She looked up at the chef and smiled warmly at him. “I’d like an assorted sashimi and a seaweed salad, thank you.”

“I’ll take the same.”

The chef nodded and Kagome watched with rapt attention as he set to work. Their salads came first, and whatever the seaweed was marinated in was delicious. There was a small bed of cucumbers underneath the seaweed, as well as a slice of lemon to the side to squeeze on as needed. The lemon only heightened the flavor and Kagome felt like she had gone to heaven.

Kagome and Kouga chatted idly as they waited for their main course, taking small bites of their salad in between. Kagome mostly talked about work, prattling on and on about some of her more ridiculous cases. While she would normally give Kouga all the gory details, she refrained this time around, seeing as they were in a restaurant. Kouga watched her as she spoke, taking in all her mannerisms and watching the way her lips moved as she talked. She had put on a dark red lipstick and it was driving him crazy. While she didn’t need makeup, in his opinion, it most definitely accentuated some of her features. What he wouldn’t give to just pull her close and kiss her senseless. But they were in public and he didn’t want to cause any embarrassment. Humans were weird about PDA, but he wanted to respect her boundaries.

They soon received their main course and thanked the sushi chef. They then proceeded to dig in and Kagome felt herself melt. It was absolutely delicious. “This is fantastic..” she said after she had finished her piece of salmon.

“Yeah, I really like this place. Everything is really fresh and high quality.”

“Yeah, you can definitely tell..” She ate a couple more pieces of fish before she finished up her story. “So, yeah.. that was a pretty wild ride.” she finished off with a shrug.

Kouga laughed. “You certainly seem to take all this in stride.”

“I mean, you kind of have to, you know? As one of my professors in school always said, ‘If you’re not laughing about it, you’re crying about it’ and they’re really good words to live by. You have to find the humor in things... Though to be fair, for this particular case it wasn’t too hard to find the humor.” she said with a giggle.

“Yeah, definitely.” he replied. There was another small pause for them to eat a bit more before Kouga spoke up again. “So here’s something I’ve been a bit confused about; why is it so important for mikos to be in the hospital? Why are you needed constantly and deemed so important but highly overworked?” he asked.

Kagome considered her wording for a moment, chewing on a piece of octopus as she did so. “Well, mikos have incredible healing abilities. It really makes a difference in life or death situations. Humans–  we’re so fragile, you know? Any little bit that can increase the rate of survival is good in a hospital. However, there’s not a lot of mikos anymore. Well, not any with the power level needed to heal major wounds and help hurry along a youkai’s healing factor.” She paused as she thought it over a bit more, taking a sip of water.

“Being overworked like we are.. it’s definitely difficult, but I love my job. I just.. I don’t know. I love helping people. I wanna do what I can. Yeah, I’m utterly exhausted most of the time, but I feel like it’s a necessary evil, you know?” She looked up at him and saw the look on his face. He seemed a bit shocked, impressed, and something else, something she couldn’t place.

Kouga’s hand twitched at his side, wanting to reach out to her, pull her close, but he refrained from doing so. She was so compassionate, and while it really shouldn’t surprise him, the intensity of it made him do a double take. He could smell the passion and determination in her scent, and it only made him fall for her harder. After a couple seconds, he lost his internal battle and brought a hand up to cup her cheek. Kagome’s breath caught in her throat, her eyes not leaving his. His gaze was intense, hypnotizing, and she couldn’t help but get lost. His thumb stroked her cheek softly, leaving a blazing trail in its wake. She unconsciously leaned into his touch, just ever so slightly. It filled Kouga with a sense of triumph and he couldn’t help but flash her a lopsided grin.

Kagome felt her heart stutter in her chest at his grin. This was it, this was how she was going to die. At least it’s not a bad way to go, she couldn’t complain about dying in the hands of a very handsome man. She smiled softly back up at him, bringing her hand up to cup his and stroke her thumb along the top of his hand.

They stayed like this for a couple more moments, silently enjoying each other’s company and unable to look away. They did, eventually, pull away to finish off their meal. Thankfully there wasn’t much left of it, the both of them eager to get out of the restaurant, maybe somewhere more secluded. Once their meal was finished, Kouga paid and once he received his check, they were out the door and walking down the street, back the way they came.

Kagome looked up at him periodically as they walked, trying to form words in her head. It was difficult, seeing how muddied it was. However, she eventually managed. “So... how did you get into this.. ‘lifestyle’ of yours?” she asked, using air quotes.

Kouga chuckled a bit. “Well, we kind of ran out of options at some point in time.” She quirked a brow at this and Kouga rubbed the back of his neck for a moment. “Y’see... we originally come from the mountains. We were driven out by our enemy, the Birds of Paradise. I don’t know if they’re still around or not, haven’t really heard anything about them in a while. We’ve always wanted to go back to our homeland, but it’s most likely been built over.”

Kagome frowned at this. Sensing her sympathy, Kouga looked down at her and gave her a smile. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t bother us anymore; we’ve had years to get over it.” He gave a shrug and that seemed to appease her, for now at least. “We grew increasingly closer to human communities, and sometime after the feudal era, when things started to develop more, we had to start blending in, or at least take advantage of what little we still had over the humans. Once they started forming gangs, we did as well. Not really hard for wolf youkai, you could say we were always kind of like a gang.” he said, giving her a wicked grin. Kagome’s eyes zeroed in on his fangs, glistening in the moonlight. She wondered what they would feel like dragging along her skin... She unconsciously licked her lips and Kouga faltered for a split second as he watched the action, light pink sliding across a deep, dark, almost blood red. However, he recovered before the miko could notice.

“But we took part in some of the.. nastier business that humans seemed reluctant to do. Most yakuza killings are done by hired youkai. Some youkai yakuza are even closely tied to the main human yakuza families. Not all of us, of course, but there are some. The majority of the youkai yakuza are independent though.”

Kagome nodded, trying to take all this information in. “I bet it’s hard.. trying to fit in with society as it changes at a rapid pace.. rapid for you at least.”

“It is a bit difficult, but we manage. You have to, or else you won’t survive.” he said simply, shrugging nonchalantly.

“Yeah, I can see that.” she replied.

“There’s just some youkai that don’t make the cut. Nothing we can really do about it.” He shrugged once again and Kagome only nodded in response.

They fell into a bit of silence then. It wasn’t uncomfortable, it was actually quite nice and relaxing. Kouga took this time to look Kagome over more. Her dress hugged in all the right places, accentuating her curves in a mouthwateringly tantalizing way. Her heels added height and brought her closer to his chin, rather than at his shoulders. It would be so easy for him to swoop down and steal a kiss. Gods how he wanted to do that.. But he wanted to do this properly; wait until he dropped her off at her door, and if she didn’t want him to stay, that was fine. He could take care of himself later once he got home.

Kagome felt his eyes on her and she resisted the urge to shudder as a chill ran up her spine. She was eager to get to her apartment, but a part of her wanted to drag this out a bit, tease him a little. So, she added a bit of an extra sway to her hips, relishing as she felt his eyes get drawn to them. She held back her smile to the best of her ability.

“So, would it be safe to assume you’re walking me to my door?” she asked. She peeked up at him from the corner of her eye, watching as a lopsided grin grew across his face.

“Well of course. It would be rude not to. This is a date after all.” he replied.

She chuckled a bit. “Good answer.” She turned her head to fully face him, flashing him a bright smile. It stunned him for a good second before he was grinning back at her.

“Why are you asking?”

“Just wanted to be sure.” She shrugged ever so casually before resting her hand on the rail of the steps leading up to her apartment.

“We both know I’m a perfect gentleman.”

She stopped at the step she was on and turned to look at him, quirking an eyebrow. “Oh, are you now?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, given what you do for a living... one could think otherwise.”

His fangs flashed in his widening grin. “And what could people possibly think?”

She paused, climbing the rest of the stairs and starting to walk down the hallway before she gave him her answer. “Well, someone could think you’re a big bad wolf.” She looked up at him through her lashes. She could see the desire in his eyes, and she was certain he could see it in hers too, hell, he could probably smell it all over her.

“And why can’t a ‘big bad wolf’ also be a gentleman?”

They were now stopped in front of her door, standing in front of each other now. She didn’t have to crane her neck up as much to look at him. She wasn’t sure if she was disappointed by this fact or not... “I don’t know.. maybe you can prove me wrong.”

He stepped closer to her and her breath caught in her throat. His smirk grew. “And how would I be able to do that?” he asked, voice low and husky. The timbre of his voice vibrated along her skin and rumbled through her chest, leaving her knees weak.

“You could kiss me goodnight.” she breathed.

His grin grew impossibly wide. His hand came up to cup her cheek, his thumb stroking the skin there for a couple seconds. He then leaned down, bringing his face closer to hers. Kagome closed her eyes as she tried to remind herself to breathe. His lips were soon pressed to hers, and they both felt as if they could die.

The kiss was supposed to be quick, chaste, fleeting. However, as soon as Kouga had started to pull away, the miko was wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him back in. Their lips crashed together, and from there, everything was hot.

A growl rumbled through Kouga’s chest as he returned her kiss with the same fierceness she was showing him. His hands snagged her waist and she was soon pressed against the door. She let out a soft, barely audible moan, but Kouga managed to catch it with his heightened sense. The small sound set him ablaze and he pushed his tongue past her lips, eliciting a gasp from the miko trapped in his hold. One of her hands traveled up to the back of his head and tried to find purchase in his hair, but he had it tied up into a ponytail. Damnit...

After a few more moments of feverish kissing, Kouga pulled away. He took in her state, feeling pride well up in his chest at the sight of her. Her lipstick was smeared and her cheeks were stained red. Her hair was slightly disheveled and she was giving off the most intoxicating scent, and he now knew what it was. The spiciness in her scent was her arousal, and it just continued to grow, getting thicker and hanging in the air longer, invading his sense and driving him mad.

Before Kagome could fully register what was going on, he dove in again, this time aiming for her neck. He pressed a kiss to her neck before giving it a small nip. She gasped and her hand that was still around his neck gripped at his jacket. He continued to bite along her neck, trying to be mindful of his fangs. They ached to sink into the skin of her neck, and despite how badly he wanted to claim her right here and right now, he knew he shouldn’t. Humans were different. He just needed to try to remind himself of that.

Kagome bit her lip, trying to keep her moans back. They were outside after all, and she wouldn’t be able to stand the embarrassment of being heard. Though after a few moments, it became too much. She lowered both her hands to Kouga’s chest and lightly pushed on it. “Kouga... in-inside..” she managed to get out.

Kouga gave her neck one last nip before he pulled away. It took the miko a couple seconds to recover, for the fog to leave her mind before she started digging for her keys. It didn’t take her long, and she was soon unlocking the door with shaky hands. They stepped inside and Kouga closed and locked the door behind them. They took off their shoes, Kagome having a bit of a difficult time with how weak her legs felt right now, and as soon as they stepped away from the door and into her living room, the wolf was on her again. Except this time he didn’t hold back.

One hand cupped her face, tilting her head back while the other pressed against her lower back. He pressed his lips against hers feverishly, pushing his tongue past her lips and pulling her body flush against his. Kagome didn’t hold back her moan, though it was muffled from the kiss. A low growl rumbled through his chest and vibrated along her skin, causing her to break into goosebumps. Her arms snaked around his neck, one hand going up to the back of his head. She reached for the elastic of his ponytail, and once she found it, she tugged on it, pulling it off until she was able to slip it around her wrist and his hair was falling loosely around his shoulders. With it now free, she grabbed a fistful of it and tugged on it as she sucked on his tongue. Kouga moaned, melting under her touch. Gods, if he wasn’t already in heaven, he was going to die and go there soon.

The kiss was broken once more, and the wolf was back at her neck, nipping on the skin a bit harsher this time, his hands gripping her hips tightly. Kagome gasped, her grip in his hair and on his jacket tightening. Her head tilted to the side, giving him more access to her neck. He gave her a pleased rumble in return. “J-Just.. no – haahh – m-marks on my.. mmmmnnneck. I don’t have a lot of.. c-concealer left..” He was a bit disappointed, but he complied with her request.

“Anywhere else fair game?” he asked, his voice rumbling through his chest.

“Y-Yes. Anywhere else.”

He hummed in response and continued his trail of small bites along her neck. Kagome’s legs felt weak under his touch, the actual thing proving to be better than she could have imagined.

She shakily brought her hands to his shoulders and started to push off his jacket. She managed to get it down to the crook in his elbows, but she was stopped there. His hands on her hips prevented her from moving the jacket any further down. Thankfully, Kouga seemed to catch onto what she was doing and he removed his hands, placing them at his sides long enough for the leather jacket to fall to the floor. Once it was off, his hands were back on her hips.

His hands soon slid up her body, ghosting along her curves and eventually reaching her shoulders, where he pulled away from her neck to slide her cardigan off and toss it to the side. His hands then reached for the back of her dress, undoing the clasp there and then reaching for her zipper. He paused, taking a moment to look at her, seek her approval. She nipped at her lower lip and he had to suppress a groan. Her hands moved to the collar of his shirt and then the buttons of it. She began to undo them and he took that as his cue.

He kept his pace in time with hers, unzipping her dress at the same pace she was unbuttoning his shirt. The zipper stopped once it reached her hips, but thankfully she was done with his shirt at the same time. She looked up at him, into his eyes and she almost got lost in them for a moment. There was a hunger in their depths and it made her shudder. Is this what prey felt like before they were devoured?

Her hands came up to his shoulders and she started to push off his shirt. His hands left her body in order for her to undress him. She looked at the exposed skin, taking in his tattoos, his abs, and his sweet, juicy, succulent tits. She brought a hand up to his chest, tracing over the linework of his tattoos. Wolves, a full moon, and lilies. To be honest, the lilies still surprised her, but she figured they had a meaning to him, or maybe to wolf youkai in general. She would have to ask him later.

While Kouga was happy she was looking him over, and even happier that she was touching him, he was eager to get her dress off. He brought his hands up to her shoulders and hooked his thumbs into the fabric and began to pull. This seemed to catch her attention, and she removed her hands from his chest instantly. Her teeth caught her lip again and Kouga tried to not focus on that for too long. He began to slide the dress off her body, watching as her skin was exposed to him. The top part of the dress was soon off and all he had to work off was the skirt. However, he took a moment to look her over, drink her in. She had on a black strapless bra that had a small lace edging. Her skin was pale, like porcelain and he couldn’t wait to mark it up, claim her as his.

His thumbs hooked into the fabric at her waist and he looked her in the eye. He sought her approval, making sure she still wanted this. She returned the intensity of his gaze and brought her hand up to the button of his pants, the corner of her mouth twitching into a snarky grin. He couldn’t help but chuckle. He began to slide off the rest of her dress as she undid his pants and let them drop to the floor. Soon, they were both standing in their underwear and Kouga nearly choked.

Lace.

Her underwear was nothing but lace. Black, floral lace. He reached a hand out and brushed his fingers along the fabric, still in awe. Kagome giggled and that snapped him out of his trance. “You alright Kouga?” she asked, her tone teasing.

He smirked back at her. “You were planning for this, weren’t you?” he asked, grabbing at her waist and slowly pulling her close.

“Maybe..” She gave him a sly smile and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“What am I going to do with you?”

“I have a few ideas..” Her eyes shifted towards her bedroom door and Kouga followed her gaze. He grinned before looking back at her.

“Would you like to discuss them in your room?”

She looked up at him through her lashes, her smile turning sultry. “Yeah, let’s do that.”

Despite their calm, casual demeanor, they quickly made their way to the bedroom. They broke out into giggles as they almost collided into each other when they reached the door. Kagome fumbled for a moment, momentarily distracted by the heat Kouga was emitting behind her. Gods she couldn’t wait for him to pin her down and utterly destroy her.

She thrust the door open, a bit more forceful than she meant to, and they both stumbled into her room. Kouga closed the door behind them with his foot. Normally, he would’ve taken time to look around the room, but Kagome was quite distracting. She was on him in an instant, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him in for a heated kiss. He groaned, pressing his hands against her back and pulling her flush against him. Her tongue delved into his mouth and he groaned in response. He could feel the corner of her mouth twitch just ever so slightly.

They kissed heatedly for a few moments before pulling away. Kouga instantly lowered himself enough to sink his teeth into the newly exposed flesh of her collarbone. Kagome cried out as he began to nip, lick, and suck harshly at a particular patch of skin. Her hands found purchase on his shoulder and her nails dug in, trying to ground herself and keep her legs from collapsing under her as his mouth began to travel down, leaving a trail of hickies.

When he reached the edge of her bra, he nibbled lightly on the skin there, his hand sliding up to unclasp it. Kagome knew she needed their position to change before he did so, because otherwise she’d be a goner. “K-Kouga... bed.. please..”

He didn’t say anything, a low rumble in his chest her only answer as he gave one last nip before pulling away. He guided her to the bed and gently pushed her down onto it before hovering over her. He unclasped her bra then and tossed it to the side. He looked her over for a moment, drinking her in and appreciating her beauty. He slowly brought a hand up and cupped her breast, giving it an experimental knead. Kagome released a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.

He watched her face intently, gauging her reaction with each move he made. He brushed his thumb over her nipple and her head tilted back just a fraction as she released a small gasp. He continued to brush over it until it perked up. Once it did, he took it between his thumb and index finger and rolled it. Kagome let out a shaky moan and Kouga couldn’t help but smirk.

He continued to work that breast with his hand as he moved his mouth back to her chest. He trailed his way down from her collarbone to her other breast. He left a particularly nasty mark on top of her breast before taking her nipple into his mouth. She cried out as he lightly poked the nub with his fangs and then soothed it by swirling his tongue around it. Before too long, he switched sides, doing the same process as last time. Kagome felt like she was going to die. Her mind was turned to mush and she was putty in his hands, gladly so.

He soon left her breasts and traveled down further. He trailed soft kisses down her stomach, nipping lightly every now and then as his hands grasped her waist. His mouth soon reached the edge of her panties and his eyes shifted to look at her. Her breathing was heavy and her cheeks were flushed a delicious shade of red. He couldn’t help but grin and feel pride at the state he was leaving her in.

Kouga’s hands gripped her hips, holding her in place as he pressed his mouth to her clothed pussy, where he gave a small suck to her clit. Kagome cried out, her hips trying to buck up, but he pinned them down. He then dragged his tongue up along her covered slit, teasing her and teasing himself with the taste of her. Her scent was strong and it was invading his sense, making it hard for him to think, but he managed to push through, albeit with great difficulty.

He continued to tease her with licks and small sucks before his thumb hooked into the band of her underwear. He pulled away from her, a disappointed whine coming from the miko before he began to slide her underwear off. He sat back on his heels for a moment, taking in the sight of her fully nude form. She was absolutely beautiful; porcelain skin marked up with reddish purple hickies, her cheeks red, lips kiss swollen, her hands trying to reach him as she grew impatient.

“Kouga.. please..” she whined.

He chuckled. “Sorry, I’ll get to it.”

Before she could respond, his hands were back on her hips, pinning her down once more as he settled between her thighs. A small sigh escaped her lips as she spread her legs further for him. Kouga chuckled and Kagome squirmed as his breath hit her exposed pussy. She was about to ask him to hurry on with it when he pressed his mouth to her and ran his tongue along her slit. She cried out, fisting the sheets below her as his tongue set to work.

He teased her at first, running his tongue along her entrance and giving small sucks to her clit, but before too long, he was merciful and he was soon pushing his tongue inside. Kagome cried out as her mind went blank. The only thing she knew in this moment was Kouga, his tongue, and how good it felt. He worked her into a frenzy, removing his tongue every now and again to lick and suck at her clit. At some point, her thighs were squeezing his head and she could feel herself coming closer and closer to the edge. Her hips kept wanting to buck, rise off the bed, but he held them down. Just as she felt she was about to go over the edge, he pulled away.

It took her a couple moments to for the fog to clear and for her to realize just what exactly happened. Once she did, her eyes snapped open and her eyebrows furrowed together. She looked up at Kouga, ready to yell at him and make him finish what he started. Just as she tried to sit up, he was pushing her back down by her shoulders, chuckling.

“Don’t laugh! Finish what you've started!”

He quirked a brow at that, an amused look on his face. “You want me to finish?”

“Yeah. You’re a gentleman, aren’t you?” she asked.

He laughed a bit more, shaking his head slightly. “I am, and don’t worry, I do intend to ‘finish what I started’. Just be patient.”

She pouted, and was about to argue more when her eyes caught his hand movements, and where exactly they were going.

His thumbs hooked into the waistband of his underwear, and Kagome watched with rapt attention. He couldn’t stop the grin that crossed his features as she slowly propped herself up on her elbows, her tongue sliding over her lips. He took his underwear off slowly, teasing her, and once it was fully off, he tossed it to the side.

She took him in and bit her lower lip. He was large. Not only was he long, but he was thick. Though that really shouldn’t be a surprise to her.. She knew she could handle a large dick, she’s taken some good dickings in the past, the only thing she was worried about was the one thing she couldn’t tear her eyes away from. His knot.

Now, she’s laid with several youkai with a manner of strange dicks. She’s dealt with ribbed, bumped, and hell, even one that was, to her surprise, two thin dicks that had been twined together and untwisted inside her and could function separately from each other. She thought it had just been some sort of corkscrew shape, and boy if she wasn’t pleasantly surprised. However, she had never come across a youkai with a knot before. So, understandably, she was a bit apprehensive. The knot itself wasn’t that large, just slightly thicker than his shaft, but she had a feeling that it could, and would, get larger than that. She licked her lips again, but this time as a nervous habit. Well.. she was sure she could handle it.

She moved to sit up further, but Kouga was quick to push her back down, an amused grin on his face. “Wha–”

“Shh. I’m a gentleman, remember?”

“And what does that have to do with me not sucking your dick?”

He faltered here, not really expecting this kind of answer from her. Gods.. having her mouth wrapped around his dick sounded fantastic, but he had a goal in mind. “Next time you can.”

“That doesn’t really answer my–” He cut her off by quickly leaning over and kissing her, softly and tenderly. She couldn’t help but instantly melt under his touch.

“Next time, I promise.” he whispered against her lips.

“I’ll hold you to that.”

“Trust me, you won’t have to.” He gave her a quick peck before pulling away from her slightly. “By the way, you wouldn’t happen to have any condoms, would you?”

She silently cursed herself. That was the one thing she had forgotten. She had been so caught up in her appearance she forgot the most important thing. Well.. she was on the pill and she had just recently had her period, so she should be good. “I don’t, but I’m on the pill so we should be fine.”

He nodded at that. With that out of the way, he positioned himself at her entrance, then looked up at her. Just to make sure. She bucked her hips in response, making them both groan at the feeling, though Kouga couldn’t help but chuckle. He got the message.

He braced himself above her and Kagome’s breath caught in her throat. He then slid in, slowly and carefully. They moaned, Kagome’s thighs shaking slightly. He continued to move slowly until he was almost fully inside her, the only thing left out was his knot. They stayed still for a couple moments, giving each other time to adjust.

Once Kagome was ready for him to continue, she let him know by bucking her hips. He chuckled. “You’re so eager..”

“Can you blame me?” she asked, somehow managing a smirk.

“No, not really.”

He pressed a kiss to her cheek as he slowly pulled out, leaving only the tip in, and then slammed back into her. Kagome swore she saw stares. Her breath caught in her throat and before she could fully react he was doing it again, and again, and again.

He kept the pace slow at first, peppering her face with kisses as he rammed into her. His slow pace didn’t last for long, as they were both needy and teetering too close to the edge. Kagome cried out, mainly a garbled mess that was akin to a verbal key smash, and sometimes his name. Any time she managed to get his name out, he would growl in response and slam into her particularly hard.

After a certain point, he pulled out completely, groaning as he did so. Kagome’s mind had just begun to clear and form coherent thought as he turned her over, raising her ass in the air and positioning himself behind her. He gave her a moment to collect and prepare herself, watching as she moved her pillows to help prop herself up on her elbows and forearms. Once she was ready, she rocked her hips up against him.

His hands were on her hips, holding her still as he slowly sank his length back into her heat. They moaned in tandem and took a couple seconds to get used to the feeling once again. Somehow he was reaching even deeper now, and Kagome had a hard time thinking. She let out a shaky breath, steadying herself before rocking against him, letting him know she was ready.

Kouga took a moment to steady himself before he pulled back and slammed back in. If she thought she saw stars before, she was certainly seeing them now, without a doubt. Kagome cried out, and continued to do so as he rammed into her. He was soon bending over her, hands palming her stomach, sliding up to her breasts as his mouth left marks on her back. His mouth moved up her back as his thrusts became more shallow.

Their breathing was ragged, and they were both so close to the edge. Kouga’s fangs were aching, wanting to sink into the flesh of her neck, mark her, claim her, mate her. But he couldn’t, not yet. But to keep himself in check, he would need to stay away from her neck. So he continued to bite along her back, enjoy the sounds she made. His knot continued to try and push in, and with each thrust, it grew closer to being able to slip in. Fuck, he should probably ask before he just up and knotted her... He gave the spot he was working on on her shoulder one last bite before he pulled his mouth away.

“K-Kagome..”

“Hmmmmmmmmm?”

“Can I... f-fuck.... Would– Do you.. wan.. want me to.. to knot–”

“I... I dooooon’t ca– care. Do.. Just...” She buried her face in the pillow as she moaned, one of her hands gripping the sheets below her. “Just dooooo ittt...” she finally managed to get out.

“Alright..” And with that, he didn’t hold back. He picked up his rhythm, one of his hands leaving her breasts and delving between her thighs. He started to rub her clit, making her cry out, though her moans were now muffled by her pillow. With one last thrust, his knot pushed in and he came, Kagome quickly following suit. Kouga made a couple shallow thrusts, not really able to do much seeing as he was now anchored inside her. They stayed there for a couple moments, Kouga pressed against her back, Kagome’s face buried in her pillow, both out of breath and collecting themselves and their ability to think.

Kagome finally turned her head to the side, her breath evening out. Oh fuck.. she still had makeup on... she should probably go remove that... She grumbled a bit before being able to form her thoughts into words. “Kouga.. can you move? I gotta.. get makeup off.”

He pressed a kiss between her shoulder blades before he answered. “Sorry, can’t move.”

“Why not?”

“That’s why.” he said, grinning at his own joke of using the play on words. However, Kagome didn’t catch on, and at her confused grumble, he chuckled a bit. “My knot. We’re gonna be stuck together for a bit.”

“How long is ‘a bit’?”

“About 15 minutes or so.”

Her eyes widened. “What?”

“Hey, could be worse. We could be here for the full 30 if I was in my true form.”

“Oh gods...”

Kouga simply laughed and Kagome rolled her eyes. “Better make ourselves comfortable.” he teased.

It took some maneuvering, but soon, they were both laying down on the bed and underneath the covers. Their legs were tangled together and Kouga had his arms wrapped around her midsection. He peppered her shoulder with soft kisses, soothing the marks he had left on her skin. Even though she still wasn’t sure what to think about the whole knotting situation, she had to admit that the cuddling was nice. Sure, they didn’t really have any other choice but to cuddle, however she knew deep down that they would’ve ended up like this at the end of the night regardless. It was nice, soothing, relaxing, and most definitely welcomed.

She snuggled further into him. “Hey, if I fall asleep, will you wake me up so I can go take my makeup off?” she asked.

“Yeah, of course.” he replied, pressing a kiss behind her ear. She giggled a bit and turned her head around, enough for him to press a couple kisses to her cheek before pressing a final one to her lips. She grinned, thoroughly enjoying the attention before turning her head back and settling into Kouga’s warmth.

[catch22inareddress]

Twin  Phœnix Chapter Two Breaking the Shackles

Words 3700+

This one has some mentions of violence and triggers

A solemn Bucky escorted you around the property after grabbing you both a beer and finding a tire swing that overlooked the bonfire and entertainment. "May I?" You nodded as he gently started to push you, careful not to let his hands stray and make you nervous. If silence was a person she was straight up laughing at you and how self-conscious you looked next to this handsome, beefy biker, pushing you on a damn tire swing. Like it was the most natural thing in the world, second to riding his Harley.

"Where do you want me to start, doll?" There was that damn pet name that he blessed you with. His cologne mixed with the leather and exhaust was already strangely intoxicating. You mentally cursed yourself for losing vision of what was important. Wanda and her safety. Your eyes immediately looked over towards the barn, the lights were still bright, and it looked peacefully calm. "What does the club really do, why is it I'm not afraid of you?"

He seemed to know what you what you were implying, he picked up that you could read people, better than even his best friend. He would admit this to few, but he found this fascinating to him. He couldn't bullshit you even if he wanted to, so he got straight to the point. Bucky blew out a harsh breath before choosing his words wisely, careful to not to cause alarm when he just got you here.

"The club shelters people, women and kids from time to time. Battered and hiding from husbands or others, on the run. We help them relocate and give them a fresh start. We have chapters all over, and sometimes the government will put them with a division like us to keep them instead of witness protection while awaiting trial." He came around, halting the swing and kneeling in front of you. His face was the most vulnerable you had ever seen him, and you wanted to know why but you knew that you didn't deserve the answer. Not when you held too many secrets from him.

"We could tell that you and Wanda were on the run." You tried to keep your voice even and gripped the ropes as he lowered his head while laying his cards on the table. "What else?"

He looked up at you with an almost pained expression. "I figure Wanda was the one and my money is on you getting her out and then fleeing." You tore your eyes away from him, not sure what to say. It was all so new and while you wanted to trust him, you couldn't not yet. Your instincts told you one thing, but your experience screamed another.

"I-I can't do this." You stood up moving past him and heard him mutter profanities under his breath. Typical hot head. "Wait!  Don't go." You scoffed at his request. "I don't owe you anything, Barnes. We don't owe you anything!"

He seized your arm, and you turned around instantly slapping him out of impulse and regretting it. His chocolate hair lay sprawled across his reddened cheek for a moment before he lowered his face and put it behind his ears again. His shoulders were down, and he looked smaller than before, and you were so ashamed of yourself.

"I-I'm fuck. Ss-sorry B-" He looked at you but instead of the rage that you were expecting it was the sorrow which confused you entirely. It thoroughly shocked you to your core. How a hot-tempered man who would throw some of the best curveballs of sarcasm and sass your way just got bitch slapped by you. Instead of being an ounce of angry, he looked like he was about to...cry.

"No, doll. That's on me; I shouldn't have grabbed you like that. I'm sorry. Please just don't go. I shouldn't have said anything and Steve would kill me if he knew I scared you and Wanda off. I just wanted -needed you to know that we can keep you both safe." His eyes were still pleading with you as he walked passed to the bonfire and left you standing in the field. Shell-shocked and pondering the last hour with him and the events that followed.

You owed Wanda that promise because he sure as hell surprised you tonight.

You went and sat next to Loki and Steve with Bucky in the near distance just watching you behind cool eyes. You texted Wanda who sent a picture that Vis took of her. She looked so happy with the baby horse that you could only smile at her goofy ass self. Steve leaned over and looked at the picture. "She can come over anytime and see them, whether we are here or not."

"Geez, Rogers! Nosey much! You're like a fuckin ninja." He laughed it off and leaned back in his chair, shrugging your offensive outburst off. "Glad to know all of my skills in the military have finally come to good use. I always wanted to be a phone creeper." He winked at you, and you found yourself loosing up even more.

"How long did you serve?" Your voice was low as you took a swig of beer not wanting to pry but feeling like he opened the topic in the first place. "I did four tours. Captain. These goons served under me." He pointed his beer to Sam and Buck, the former grinned proudly, and the latter just nodded.

"Why did you guys get out?" Sam was the first to reply to your inquiry. "Turns out I follow Steve, just a little bit slower. I did one more tour and then came here."

You turned to Steve, but he just looked at Bucky for his answer. Buck looked at you in the eyes for the first time since the field and spoke. "Steve got out right after I was injured. We grew up together in Brooklyn, like brothers he and I. We came here for....my sister." His voice broke towards the end, and you knew not to press him for any other information.

Steve was the first to speak after that. "Yea, turns out we're all the kinds of strays that became a family. Everyone that ends up here either passes through quickly or stays as the family." You nodded your head and looked at the orange and red embers in the fire in front of you.

"Which one are the Maximoff twins?" You bit your lip to keep it from quivering. "I wish to hell I knew." You said barely above a whisper, but you were still sure that the men heard you because of the solemn nod.

By the time Wanda made it back with Vis it was about two am and you were nearly nodding off on the chair with Loki's jacket covering you and Thor singing some ridiculous song about Thor's Mighty  Hammer in reference to his dick. Sam had already gone home, and Vis had reluctantly said goodbye to Wanda.

As you were standing up to leave Bucky came up to you, Steve and Wanda. "Hey, why don't you girls stay here tonight? It'll be safer than driving home this late." Steve's eyes lit up. "That's a great idea, we have two guest rooms that you ladies can have tonight." Steve rubbed his hands together excitedly at the thought of you two spending the night while clear apprehension stained your features.

"I-I don't know."  You said while looking at you sister, Wanda spoke up and leaned over out of earshot from the men. "You don't sleep well as it is. Maybe having them close will help? You can let your guard down for one night with them close. C'mon." When she pulled back, you could finally see how concerned she was of you, and you felt guilty. You didn't want her to worry about you, truth be told you thought you were hiding the restless nights well, but it must've been the twintuition, as you called it, that was tattle-tailing on you.

"Ok, we can stay. For you." She smiled, and all of you walked to the house. As luck would have it your room was next to Bucky's while hers was next to Steve's. Due to Bucky's confession, you didn't find it odd that there were extra toothbrushes in the bathroom, which you eagerly used. When you heard a soft knock on the door, you opened it assuming Wanda would be standing there; instead, you found a timid biker with his long hair pulled back in a bun at the nape of his neck. He looked positively sinful, and you had to shake your thoughts out of the gutter and reign them in.

You allowed yourself to do a double take to capture all of his features, chiseled jaw and bright eyes all customarily hidden behind a cloud of smoke and dark hair. "Something wrong, doll? I'm sorry to bother you." You smiled shaking the thoughts away, again. "No, no. Just like the hair pulled back. I can actually see you." At that moment if someone said you could make a biker like Bucky blush, you would've told them to shut the fuck up and stuff it where the sun doesn't shine but here he was. Pink as a My Little Pony.

He tucked a stray hair behind his ear and cleared his throat. "I'll have to remember that. I -uh brought you some clothes to sleep in. Steve gave some to Wanda, there's food and drink in the fridge downstairs if you need anything. Make yourself at home. If you need me, you can bang on the wall or come in." You snorted. "I can assure you I'm not just walking in your room. I don't want my eyes tainted with whatever the hell you do in there after hours. I have enough nightmares as it is. "

He laughed at your snark. "Oh, I can guarantee you that would want to keep your eyes opened to anything happening in my room. I can chase away any bad dreams, baby girl. " Your mouth opened and then closed a few times before he laughed again. "Never thoughtta you as the speechless type, baby girl."

And just like that you two were back to normal, and the field was an incident of the past. He seemed fine, but you still felt that you needed to address it, even though he didn't care. He was an enigma of a man, and you couldn't figure him out. You had your share of biker experience, and they were all bad news, but this club was different, a family and not a pack of rabid dogs.

 After he bid you goodnight, you changed into Bucky's clothes and climbed into bed wistfully wishing he had worn them because you desired his scent.

Bucky was unsettled, and couldn't find sleep even if he saw himself hunting it like a sniper in the army. He finally threw off the covers and walked out to his balcony only to find Steve smoking a cigarette from his own balcony

. He chuckled from a distance. "You too, huh?' Bucky just leaned against the railing and lit the cigarette, watching the plume of smoke lift above his tired head. "Yep." Popping the "P" at the end.

"Would it happen to have anything to do with that feisty little number only a wall away?" Bucky shot a side sneer to Steve in hopes that it would shut him up, but he knew better. "You understand we need to get her to talk. With Hydra looking for them, it'll only be a matter of time before they're found. We need to know how deep they are in and what we’re up against if we have any chance of offering them protection. We can call in another chapter...." Bucky huffed and ran his hair too harshly through his hair and winced at the pain. Steve stared at him, deciding against speaking any further about the woman in the house 

"I know! I just, I don't want to scare her. I almost fucked up in the field earlier, and I was afraid she was going to take off. I think Wanda would put up a fight to stay. I know she likes it here but I can see Y/N fighting it, and I just hate that she won't trust me." Steve took his feet off of the railing and stood, flicking his cigarette off into the grass.

"She's scared man. We've seen it one too many times, the only difference is that she trusts you more than any of us. Even Loki. They have a friendship, but he says she won't tell him anything about her past." The pressure was immense at this moment to keep you two safe. Not only had he never felt this aching pull to any person before this was the first time anyone that came here took to him like you did. He fought and defended all of the women and families that show up on the doorstep but they always gravitated to Steve or Sam, they oozed charm and kindness. He didn't have that allure. Sure by the time they left everyone had a silent appreciation for him, and hugs were shared, but still. This was definitely different. 

He was scared shitless of fucking this up and losing you before he even had you. Bucky wanted nothing more than to earn your trust and make you and Wanda call this place home; but how does one soften the edges around years of razor-sharp knives sharpening every corner of his soul?

He gave a mock salute to his previous Captain, which earned him a middle finger salute. Bucky walked into his room, and before he could lay down, he heard you from the other room. Whimpering in your sleep and his fingers twitched at his side. The internal debate of whether to go to you or stay was instantly decided when he heard your pained cry making him open his door with more force than necessary.  His primal instant was to get to you, and he couldn't explain it.

He knocked on the door at first, and your cries were silenced. "It's me, doll. Can I come in?" He couldn't make out your response, so he just decided to open the door, and he saw you sitting on the edge of the bed with your head in your hands. On sheer impulse, he found himself kneeling in front of you and cautiously taking your hands in his.

You were the first to break the silence after he held your delicate hands in his larger calloused ones. "Sorry, ya know for waking you?" He chuckled at your concern for his beauty sleep. "I'll survive. I sleep for shit anyways."

"Bed too soft?" He looked quizzically into your red-rimmed eyes. "I just heard... that coming back from the military and sleeping on the ground and shit, it's hard to sleep sometimes on the mattress?" He barked out a laugh at your random rambling, and his toothy smile made you grin, forgetting about your heart-wrenching nightmare. You were sure that one look from James Barnes could chase away the devil’s army.

"Nah. Not the bed, doll." You patted the spot next to you before you scooted up against the headboard. He took your invitation and lazily sprawled out on the end of the bed, careful to give you the distance you desired but the company you needed.

"So what keeps you up then?" His brows furrowed and he looked at his hands. You could finally see as your eyes adjusted and took in the full sight of his arm. He glanced at it and then you, as you saw all of the scars from the shrapnel and burns, mapped out over his entire left appendage.  "I shouldn't have asked." He shrugged and looked at you for a beat. 

"Question for a question?" You bit your lip at his proposal and were reluctant, but the curiosity of being able to get to know this ex-military and baffling enigma of a biker was currently overpowering your self-preservation. "Ok." He allowed a smirk to grace his darkened features and you pulled your bare legs to your chest.

"So, Bucky. What happened to your arm?" The man sighed and looked off into the distance but began, not giving you a chance to regret or apologize for asking. "Saved a kid from a blast in the military. Nearly lost my arm. I- um... Steve found me. Carried me two miles with the skin and muscle just..hanging off. I have a shit ton of nerve damage, but I was able to keep the arm. I don't feel a lot of pain in it most days. Then other days it's all I feel, damndest thing." His voice was careful, yet you could see the pain behind his eyes, no doubt recounting all the disturbing memories that burned his thoughts at the mere mention of what happened.

"Thank you for telling me." He nodded, and you braced yourself for his question. "When was the last time someone took you on a date, doll." You sat there in silence for a stone cold moment. You were sure he would question something a bit more severe from you and Wanda's past but instead this?

You laughed trying to keep the blush at bay. "It's been a while." He gave you his best look of ridicule. "Ya gotta do better than that, woman."  

"Fine. It was New Years a year ago." His eyes widened. "You shittin' me?" You shook your head at his doe-eyed look of wonder. "I had a lot going on. Plus there was another guy that I..worked with. He showed too much interest in me and scared a lot of the good ones off." You were risking giving him too much information, but you felt protected with him and for once, really wanted to let someone in.

"Your turn, Y/N." You were thankful that he didn't press. "When was the last time that you had someone?" He thought for a moment at your question. "Well, that's a loaded question. Someone could go a number of ways. I had a lady friend a few months back but it’s no strings, we have an understanding. The last Someone that I had was when I was in the military.  I came back less of a man, and she didn't want me. She left me ...in the hospital."

"Wow. I'm--." He cut you off before you could say another word. "The thing I've learned over the years that matters is the people that stay, not the people that leave. I couldn't give two fucks about Dot. I do care about everyone in my life now and those who care enough to stay."

For some unknown reason that you couldn't describe for the first time in your life, you wanted to stay. For yourself. You know the stillness was thick, but you couldn't wrap your head around the thought that had just absorbed you and what it could possibly mean. Bucky thankfully broke it with his velvety smooth voice.

"My turn?" You simply nodded and gave him a smile. "Do you trust me?" It was a simple question, but you knew it meant so much more than if he was asking anyone else. You trusted your instincts and needed to tell your previous encounters to shut the fuck up. 

 "Yes, Bucky. I do. I don't know why I do. Please... don't make me regret it." You unfolded yourself a bit, and he sat up, making his way closer to you.

"If there is one thing that I can promise you. ...and Wanda. I will never make you regret putting your faith and trust in me." You gave him a watery smirk, trying to keep your emotions at bay. "So I guess my question is how much do you want to know?" He bit his lip and furrowed his dark brow.

"As much as you are comfortable with telling me." He went to brush a piece of hair back from your face, and by muscle memory, you flinched. "M'sorry..... I won't hurt you, baby girl."

"I know. We came from a place that did though. It's a hard habit to kick." He recognized from seeing all the families come through here.

"About a year ago Wanda got involved with a guy name Brock Rumlow. Real bad fucker ...runs a chapter under a gang called Hyrda. I knew from the get that he was the devils reject and the shit under his shoe. Wanda, however, she sees the good in people and thought she could fix him. I had to get in with the gang to be close to her when he cut her off, and she couldn't get out." You felt the tears run down your cheek as he sat in front of you, crisscrossed legs and holding your hand. Anchoring you in the now so you wouldn't get lost in the fury of your recollections.

"I ran his books with a guy named Eddie or Venom, his right-hand man, well he took a liking to me. I was able to keep him away most of the time but...I had to keep up ...appearances if I wanted to stay with Wanda." Your eyes went dull, and Bucks' fists went white with rage. "Shhh. It's alright."

"I was able to break us out after a particularly bad night. Wanda was..fuck. I found her beaten in a corner. I grabbed as much as I could and carried her to the car. I had a nurse friend, Claire, check her out and then we fled. I haven't looked back." The tears flowed freely now.

"Crossbones, I mean Brock and Eddie are going to come for us. I know they are. I am fucking terrified, Bucky. I don't know if I can protect her next time. All I know to do is run...I can’t let her see me like this. "

He wiped the tears off of your face and pulled you into his lap, you were pliant to his touch. "Stay don't run. We will protect both of you. I will protect you."

You buried your face into the crook of his neck, seeking the safety in his scent and warmth.  "I'm not worried for me, damnit! I'm scared for Wanda!" You went to pull away, but he kept you close and looked at your face.

"Well, I'm worried about you, woman! Let someone care for you. The club and I will keep both of you. Just don't you dare fuckin' run. You got me, doll?" He held your face and between his herculean hands before returning them to your back as you slowly nodded while staring into his deep blue eyes. 

The conviction on his face felt as though he was burning your soul, the blue of his eyes was branding you.

"I'll stay."

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[flickerofcalum]

once bitten, twice shy | part six

part one // part two // part three // part four // part five // masterlist

They’d been driving for only about thirty minutes and Luke was trying his hardest to sleep, but it was hard when Brinley was so close to him. The smell of her perfume, still the same as it had been when they were together, was intoxicating and she looked so cute with her blonde hair tucked under a beanie. He couldn’t stop himself from staring, but thankfully she was wrapped up in her own world. She was staring out the window with headphones in her ears, a blanket even fuzzier than the one Luke had brought draped over her knees. All Luke wanted to do was curl up next to her and go to sleep, but he knew that wasn’t an option.

Luke despised early mornings. There was nothing worse than forcing himself out of his comfortable and warm bed, especially now that it was snowing outside. However, the idea of getting out of his hometown for the weekend was a good consolation for having to get up so early. He felt a little strange being home, especially since his parents were out of the country and he was staying with Michael and his parents. It just felt like he didn’t belong anymore. So, he was definitely happy to get away from it all for a while, especially if it meant spending more time with Brinley.

After Luke helped her pick out a Christmas tree, it felt like something had shifted between them. He didn’t think Brinley was necessarily ready to forgive him, but it did feel like she was more open to the idea of a friendship with him. Luke knew he would always want more with her, but he knew he would be lucky to have her back in his life anyway he could. He was hoping to get a chance to really talk to her while they were at the cabin.

After forcing himself out of bed, Luke quickly took a shower and got ready, bundling himself up in a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie. The cabin was about two hours away and thankfully he wasn’t trying, so he planned on bringing a blanket and curling up in the backseat of whatever car he ended up in.

He didn’t bother to knock as he went into Michael’s room, going over to his closet to steal one of his friend’s many fuzzy blankets. “You almost ready?”

Michael grumbled a bit from where he was in the bathroom brushing his teeth. “I can’t believe they’re making us leave this early.”

Luke snorted as he sat down on Michael’s bed. “Your girlfriend is the one who’s responsible for this.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Michael insisted as he came out of the bathroom, reaching for a hoodie and pulling it over his head.

“How long are you gonna tell yourself that lie?” Luke raised an eyebrow at him.

Michael rolled his eyes, spraying some cologne on himself. Luke had only seen him put on cologne when they went to special events back in LA and he was a bit amused that his friend was putting so much effort into getting ready. “She doesn’t want to be with me like that, dude. Besides, our lifestyle isn’t really the best circumstance for a relationship.”

“Has she told you she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you?” Luke said, clutching the blanket to his chest. He knew this thing between Olivia and Michael was complicated and had given up understanding a long time ago, but he could see the way his best friend lit up whenever he was with her. He never looked that happy to see anyone and that had to mean something. “Have you even told her how you feel?”

Michael avoided his gaze, grabbing the duffel bag he’d packed. “It’s complicated,” he said, making his way out of the room.

Luke followed him, grabbing his own bag from where he’d left it in the hallway before he made his way down the stairs and into the kitchen where Michael had gone. “Dude, you love her. You don’t even have to say it out loud. You’ve written nearly an entire album’s worth of songs about her, just play her one and she’ll know.”

The red-haired boy scoffed. “Who said they’re about her?”

“Because contrary to popular belief, I’m not a complete idiot,” Luke replied, hopping up on the counter after he grabbed one of the muffins Michael’s mom had baked for them the night before. That was one of the best things about staying with the Cliffords – Karen was always baking or cooking something delicious, expressing her worry about the amount of take out they had been eating while living in LA. “Who else would they be about?”

“Well, what about the songs you’ve written about Brinley?” Michael shot back as he grabbed a muffin as well.

Luke nearly choked on the bite of muffin he was eating. “What about them? I used to play songs I wrote for her all the time when we were together.”

Michael raised an eyebrow. “What about the ones you’ve written since you broke up?”

After the break up, songs about lost love and heartbreak had poured out of Luke. He’d been reluctant to show any of them to the guys because they all just felt so personal.  Although he knew it would happen eventually, the idea of Brinley hearing any of them was terrifying. “That’s different. I don’t have a chance in hell with her.”

“How are you so sure I have a chance with Liv?” Michael asked.

“Because any girl who’s been willing to put up with your shit this long must really love you,” Luke replied matter of factly, hopping off the counter. Michael stayed quiet and Luke hoped he was really considering his words. He just wanted to see his best friend happy. “We better get going, dude. I don’t want to hear Ash’s bitching about us being late.”

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

Things were going better than Luke could’ve hoped for. When he and Michael had met up with everyone else, Olivia announced that she and Michael would be taking her car with all the supplies and luggage loaded in the back while everyone else would be in Calum’s car. Of course, Ashton had called shotgun as soon as she’d finished speaking – as if anyone had any doubt about who was going to sit by Calum’s side – which meant he and Brinley were together in the back.

They’d been driving for only about thirty minutes and Luke was trying his hardest to sleep, but it was hard when Brinley was so close to him. The smell of her perfume, still the same as it had been when they were together, was intoxicating and she looked so cute with her blonde hair tucked under a beanie. He couldn’t stop himself from staring, but thankfully she was wrapped up in her own world. She was staring out the window with headphones in her ears, a blanket even fuzzier than the one Luke had brought draped over her knees. All Luke wanted to do was curl up next to her and go to sleep, but he knew that wasn’t an option. So, finally, he got the courage to actually speak to her, tapping her gently on the knee and smiling gently once she pulled one ear phone out.

“What are you listenin’ to?” He asked, chewing on his bottom lip.

“The 1975’s new album,” she said. “Have you heard it?”

Luke shook his head. He’d been a bit out of the loop since he’d gotten back into town, mostly focusing on writing his own music rather than listening to anything new. “S’it any good?”

Brinley bit her lip, seemingly mulling something over before she held out an ear bud. “Wanna listen with me?”

His stomach fluttered as he nodded, trying his hardest not to seem eager as he unhooked his seatbelt so he could slide into the seat in between them, sticking the headphone in his ear. Their knees brushed as he got comfortable next to her, pulling the blanket up to his chin and leaning his head back against the seat. As nervous as he was, being close to Brinley was still like second nature to him and somehow, he felt more relaxed than he had in months. He closed his eyes, focusing on the feeling of Brinley’s knee pressed against his and Matty Healy’s voice.

It was only a matter of time before his eyes started fluttering closed and he tentatively let his head rest against the girl’s shoulder. He held his breath, preparing himself to be pushed away, but instead Brinley just shifted so he could be more comfortable. Luke let himself start to drift off, a small smile on his lips.

@jetblackyoungblood, @dontstopisagoodsongchangemymind, @reallycalum

[yodawgiherd]

New Year's Eve

Rating : T

>>>Read on AO3<<<

2018 was fun, so let's hope that 2019 will be even better ( and maybe some happiness in the manga amongst all the angst? please? ) I do hope that y'all enjoyed the celebrations and holiday! And thank you for sticking this long with me. ;)

Enjoy!

As it is with most of the good things in life, even this time of peace they enjoyed together had to end.

“I know I said that you can most likely take the week off,”, Erwin was saying, a hint of an apology in his voice, “but we are really shorthanded, and we need everyone able. So, can I count on you?”

Eren’s eyes flew over to meet Mikasa’s grays, and he offered her a shrug. Judging from the pout that formed on her lips, she knew almost instantly what he was implying. He sighed.

“Of course, sir. I’ll be there right away.”

He hung up, coming to the couch, where Mikasa was sitting, the movie they were watching on pause in front of it.

“I’m sorry.”, he said, “but..”

“It’s fine.”, she shook her head, giving him a smile, “This is important, I know. Just go.”

After leaning in to get his goodbye kiss, Eren pushed himself away and shrugged on his jacket, only pausing in the door to call the classic “I love you!”, before leaving. Sure, relaxing was nice and all, but when the hospital needed him, he would answer. Always.

Arriving at his destination after a drive through the city, which was admittedly less clogged than he expected, Eren was greeted in the break room by no one else but Ymir, bleary eyed and obviously tired.

“Not resting?”, he asked, watching her empty her coffee in a single gulp.

She shook her head.

“Krista was needed in the archives, so I just said to myself, fuck it, what am I going to do home alone.”, Ymir let out a long exhale, “Best decision of my life. Really.”

“Well, don’t worry, I am here to save you now, fair maiden.”

“Oh, there is more than enough work for both of us, brave knight.”, she stood, throwing away the plastic cup and stretching, “Get changed, we have a lot of shit to do.”

Eren saluted.

“Yes ma’am.”

It turned out that Ymir was right, as usual, and basically as soon as he reported in, there was a patient waiting.

“Firework accident.”, the nurse was reading from the card in a monotone voice. “Hand injury, removal of fingers.”

Seems like some people were starting early with the new year celebrations, as it was still a few days away. Eren clicked his tongue, leaning in to inspect the wound up close. Luckily, the patient was sedated, asleep, so he could do his work in peace. Nurse already cleaned most of the blood away, so he could clearly see that the damage was bad, but not as bad as he feared. Two of his fingers, index and middle ones, had to go, that was for sure, there was no way to save them. But with a bit of luck and some stitching Eren was confident that he could save the patient’s thumb. Nodding to the nurse, he got to work.

Few hours later, he was already working on someone else, picking out lead balls from the intestines of an unfortunate thief who picked the wrong house to break in, and got greeted with a shotgun to the gut. He didn’t even notice that the day outside turned into evening and was slowly but surely progressing to the night.

Working at the archives wasn’t bad, and most of the time Krista enjoyed it. Some people could surely find it boring, just sitting in a small office next to the records, endlessly solving problems over e-mails or answering requests for specific files to be picked out. But she liked it. She could work at her own pace, do stuff her own way, as long as she did everything that was asked of her. So far, there wasn’t a single complaint recorded about her work. It was fair to say that Krista did miss human interaction, from time to time, as most of her shift she talked to a computer. Modern age had its perils.

Checking the clock on the wall, she could see that her shift coming to an end, and with basically all her work done for today, she had some time to sit back and relax, a luxury that Ymir just a few rooms away surely couldn’t afford. Krista reclined back in her chair, closing her eyes, and allowed her mind to wander, just for a few minutes, she promised herself. No more dozing off, damn it. The stream of her memories carried her back to the Christmas eve, and the night that followed, an event she thought about a lot, lately. They were both a bit tipsy, and Ymir still probably had the need to prove that she really did love her after that gift. Honestly, Krista wasn’t lying when she said that she loved the sweater. It was funny, and something that would always remind her of Ymir, any time she looked at it. But her girlfriend thought otherwise, and it translated into an amazing night, one that Krista blushed about when she recalled it. Ymir was so rough with her back then, pinning her down to the mattress, whispering all those dirty things to her ear while holding her down, it was ….. intoxicating. In her office, Krista bit her bottom lip, sliding a hand into her hair, remembering all those spicy details. In short, she loved it, and would go for it again, but Ymir usually wasn’t like that. Most of the time she was gentle, despite her brash nature, and careful. Maybe, Krista thought, maybe I should speak to her about it. Tell her to lose up a bit, to roughen up. Maybe…

She shook her head, straightening in the chair, forcing the pleasant feeling down before it overcomes her. Krista really had no intention of being caught with her hand in her pants, that would be beyond awkward. But the decision to say something to Ymir when they are home again remained. After all, what was there to lose? Satisfied with her own thinking, she moved her attention back to work, finishing up the little details. There was no rush, was there?

“Seriously, what’s eating you?”

Levi looked up from the bills, watching Hange take a seat across the table.

“What are you talking about?”

“You’ve been acting strange for some time now. Come on, tell me!”

“You’re just imagining things.”, he waved his hand, hoping that she’ll take it as a cue to leave, “I was always like this.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it.”, she made no move to leave. Not like he expected her to give up that easily, but man can hope. “There’s something…”

She couldn’t know, there was just no way. Still, under her piercing gaze, Levi had to fight the urge to pocket his phone that was lying innocently next to him on the table. He was pretty sure that if he would unlock it, Petra’s number would still be ready to dial, but the green button never pressed. He forced himself to calm down. She’s just guessing. Easy. Just keep your cool.

“You probably injected yourself with some virus over at that shitty lab of yours.”, he said in his usual bored voice, looking back to the paperwork, “If you die, I expect some part of your things as heritage.”

Still scanning him, Hange stood up, making her way towards the exit.

“And where are you going?”, Levi frowned. She just came here, didn’t she?

“Just going to make some changes to my last will and testament, nothing serious.”, and with a mysterious smile, she was gone.

No, there was no way she could find out about his dilemma. None. With a feeling of uneasiness, he just couldn’t chase away, Levi did his best to focus back on the bills, letting the rows of numbers devour him. At least the new year party was just few days away. He can unwind there.

Sasha wheeled herself into the room, slamming the door closed behind her. On the other side, Connie let out a long groan, and she could hear the chair scraping as he sat down at the table. She pressed her forehead against the cool wood, mentally cursing herself. Their fights were getting worse, and it was entirely her fault. She was more and more angry, at herself really, but she kept letting her rage out on Connie, who was completely innocent. But what was she supposed to say?

“Hey, you remember the girl who shattered my spine? Well, we started talking and she randomly came to my house, and robbed my wallet, whoopsie. Want some cake?”

Yea, right, that’s not going to work. She was so stupid, it was astonishing. Sasha, why don’t we trust the obviously homeless thief and invite her in? Oh, but what a splendid idea Sasha’s brain, lets get right on it! Most of the time, she just wished she could forget about it all, and move on. But some part of her kept clinging to the memories. The look in Gabi’s eyes, the way she apologized to her… Of course, she was most likely just acting, and Sasha was eating it all up. The dumbass she was.

And now she was poisoning her relationship with her amazing boyfriend, who was nothing but supportive, and was now blaming himself because he thought that she was angry about the fact that he had to leave on Christmas. To meet a man they needed for the bar, which was her idea in the first place. Taking a deep breath, she opened her laptop, and opened a supplier list, hoping to get lost in the work for a time. Whatever the new year would bring, Sasha hoped that it would be better than this one.

“I think I want to talk to her.”, Armin said, mentally dreading the answer from his therapist.

Hitch was silent, and the only thing he could hear was her tapping the notebook with her pencil.

“And what do you expect from it?”, she asked, most likely trying to decipher the motive behind his sudden decision.

“Closure, I guess.”

“The silence from her part could be considered closure. Perhaps she doesn’t want to see you again. I’m not saying that’s the case,”, Hitch shifted in her chair, “but are you prepared if it is?”

“I think so, yes.”, Armin’s eyes traced the ceiling he knew so well, after so many sessions, “Even if she really doesn’t want to see me anymore, as long as I’ll hear her say it, I’ll understand.”

“Well, it’s been over two months, if you really think you are ready, I won’t discourage you. It is an important decision however, so I’d advice that you sleep on it a few times and see how it goes. Maybe after the new year?”

“All right.”, he chuckled, “Sounds like a great start to a new one.”

Maybe It would be his last conversation with Annie in his life, but for some reason, he was looking forward to it, whatever the outcome.

Thinking back, Eren was sure that he didn’t expect to spend the last day of the year at work. But here he was, sitting across the table from Ymir, having a silent staring contest. They had the day shift, from morning all the way to evening, so just a few hours back he had to wake up, untangle himself from Mikasa’s warm embrace, and drive through the city to relieve Onya, who worked the night.

“At least we’ll get to the party.”, he said, trying to lighten Ymir’s mood.

She snorted.

“We’ve been here most of the last week, we deserve it.”

She was correct. The last few days Eren felt that the only thing he did was work, drive home, fall asleep, and repeat the circle.

“And we’ll be late anyway.”, Ymir pointed out, adding insult to injury.

“We’ll be there for midnight, that’s the most important part.”

“Right, whatever.”, she cracked her knuckles, looking left and right, before leaning closer. “I need to ask you something. Have you talked to Krista lately?”

“Uhm, can’t say I have. Why?”

“She’s been acting… strange.”

“Strange how?”

“Fuck, I don’t know. Strange!”, Ymir sat back, crossing her arms, “Giving me weird looks and shit.”

“Maybe she just finally noticed how ugly you are.”, Eren stroked his chin, thoughtful, “And is figuring out the way to leave you.”

“Very funny Yeager.”, she stood up, throwing him a very ugly look, “Go fuck yourself.”

“Hey, I was just joking, you know that, right? Ymir?”

But she already stormed out of the door. What the hell was wrong with her? Well, maybe Eren could decipher it at the party, it was just a few hours away anyway.

It was going pretty great, all things considered. From her perch at the bar, Mikasa could see that there was tension written in the bodies of her friends, especially Connie and Sasha, but they put up a friendly face for the guests. Levi also looked like he was in serious need of relaxation, and Krista and Armin seemed to be thinking about something, only paying half a mind to their surroundings. Other than that, it was amazing. Onya arrived, and once again became the heart of the party, with Hitch and Jean for support. Carla seemed to having fun, talking with Hange, who for once wasn’t writing in her notebook. Miracle, really. As the night progressed, Eren and Ymir finally appeared, and she made sure to kiss her boyfriend in a place where Levi could see them, just to enjoy his disgusted grunt. It was the little things that made her happy.

“Eren?”

With a start, he woke up from his micro sleep, realizing that he was sitting at the bar with Armin next to him. Fuck, he was tired. The shift drained him more than he expected, and all he wanted now was just to go home and fall asleep in his bed. Nah, he wouldn’t ruin the party like this. Right, Armin asked him something.

“Yes?”

Nailed it.

“I wanted to talk to you.”, his blond friend said, the smile on his face suggesting that he very much knew about Eren’s battle against his tiredness.

“What about?”

“I’m going to Annie’s house tomorrow, to speak to her.”

“Oh.”, well that was sudden, “Want me to come with you?”

But Armin was already shaking his head.

“Nah, I have to do this on my own. There’s something else though. I wanted to ask…”, he fell silent for a time, probably looking for the right words, “When you and Mikasa broke up, how did you come back together?”

“Oh man, I don’t know what to tell you.”, Eren scratched the back of his head, “There’s really nothing to say.”

“Is it that personal?”

“No, not personal, but there just isn’t any secret. We just…. reunited, that’s it. The moment I saw her again, I knew I don’t want to live without her. It was just too painful.”

“Just like that huh.”

“Yea.”, Eren shrugged, “Just like that.”

“All right well, I think I’ll let you sleep in peace now. Thanks for the advice.”, with that, Armin stood up, leaving Eren with only his heavy lids as companions.

Alone again, Eren decided that he can’t win this duel, and made his way over to where Mikasa was sitting, taking a break from the socializing. She smiled when she saw him approach, his little sun. Fuck, he loved her so much.

“I’m tired.”, he blurted out, falling on his ass next to her.

With a grin, Mikasa patted her lap, and he took the invitation immediately, laying his head down on her thighs. This was just perfect, there was no other way to describe it. Her fingers started combing through his hair, playing with the strands, and Eren was slowly but surely falling asleep, completely obvious to the music or the party around them.

“Miki?”, he murmured, already half gone.

“Hmmm?”

“Why do we…fit?”

“What do you mean?”, there was a slight confusion in her question.

“Armin asked me how we got back together after our… break. And I told him that I have no idea, that it just happened.”

“Well, you are right,”, she giggled, “it did just happen.”

“But that’s just the thing. The time without you was just so painful, both physically and mentally, that when there was only the slightest chance that I can have you back, I jumped right on it.”, he yawned, “Isn’t it weird?”

For a while, she just stroked his hair, and Eren thought that he’s going to fall asleep before she spoke again.

“I like it.��, she finally said, tugging the strands away from his face, “It’s like a deeper, more intimate love. Maybe we really are soulmates.”, she blushed a bit, praying that he was too tired to notice, “The…things we do together, I can’t even imagine doing them with someone else. I wouldn’t want to.”

Cheesy. But he liked it. He liked her. Closing his eyes, he let himself drift off, hoping that Mikasa will wake him for the midnight drink. That was way too important to miss.

A hand on her shoulder woke Ymir up, blinking into the lights. Where was she again? Oh right, the bar. Drinks and exhaustion really didn’t mix well together. Looking left and right, she could see that it was no one else but Krista who woke her, and she allowed herself to smile.

“Hey baby, having fun?”

“I’d be having more fun if my girlfriend wasn’t sleeping.”, she sighed, “But other than that, its great. Eren fell asleep on Mikasa’s legs, so now when I talk to her she keeps stroking his hair, like a Bond villain stokes his cat. It’s funny.”

“Oh really.”, Ymir fought back a yawn, “Sounds great.”

Krista slid on the bench next to her, leaning so close that their foreheads were almost touching. At first Ymir thought that she’s going to kiss her, but then she realized that she was whispering to her.

“I wanna talk.”

“Okay..”, tiredness can wait, Krista wants to talk. Work, brain. “Shoot.”

“Do you remember Christmas?”, seeing Ymir nod, she continued, “And the night after?”

Confused, Ymir nodded again. Krista was blushing furiously, but pressed on, really wanting to get this off her chest. She took a deep breath.

“Ijustwannasaythatilikeditandwouldliketodoitagain.”

“Ehm… Slower please?”

“I liked it, when you were…rough. I’d like to do it again. If its okay with you. Of course.”, she wasn’t looking at her, probably too embarrassed, and her eyes remained focused on the table, “I want to try things, things I never done with anyone. Because I trust you. So, what do you say?”

“What do I say?”, Ymir grinned, wrapping an arm around her shy lover’s shoulders, “I say that if I wasn’t so god damn tired, I’d take you home right now and show you just how rough I can be.”

“Its okay.”, Krista did look up, reaching out and running her fingers over Ymir’s cheek, “We have all the new year to experiment.”

The kiss was soft, almost in contradiction to her previous statement, but Ymir wouldn’t complain, that was for sure. She loved it either way.

Despite his best efforts, Levi was having a pretty good time. That was, until he ran into a very familiar red-haired girl.

“Hey Levi, long time no see.”

Petra. What the hell was she doing here? Levi could feel all his motor functions freezing, with his having no idea what to do. How did she know? Did she come because of him? Was it a coincidence? No fucking way. He had to get out of this conversation, solve this problem. Now.

“Hi, Petra. Having a good time? That’s great, but I gotta run, talk to you later.”

With that, he turned on his heel, all but running away from her. Hange. It had to be her doing. Angry, really fucking pissed, he found her, gripped her arm and dragged her away from the surprised Carla, finding a corner with no one else in it.

“What the fuck did you do?”, he spat out, pressing her against the wall. For all his aggression, Hange was still completely calm, watching him over the rim of her glasses.

“What did I do?”

“Petra!”, he had to fight the urge to shake her, to do anything to get any reaction out of her. “You invited her here, didn’t you?”

“I did.”

“Why!? You had no fucking right.”

“Excuse me?”, she twisted her arm free of his hand, still completely unmoved, “I have no right to invite a nice young lady I met to a party?”

“That’s not what I mean.”, Levi took a step back, rubbing his forehead. His anger was dying down, replaced by confusion.

“Levi.”, Hange put a hand on his shoulder, “I’ve been watching you stare into that phone of yours for hours in the last weeks. So yes, I took some steps to help you.”

“Help me?”, he laughed, “How does this help me?”

“Well, if you manned up for a change, you could go and talk to the girl. Or you can just keep your head in the sand. I gave you the option, if you take it is entirely up to you.”

Hange squeezed past him, returning to Carla, and Levi was alone. Screw it, he needed to calm his nerves. Slipping out of the door, he lit up a cigarette, exhaling the smoke against the dark sky. This party just took a turn for the worse, that was for sure. The door creaked, and a figure came to stand next to him, watching the stars. Levi didn’t even need to look to know who it was.

“I’m sorry.”, Petra said, breaking the silence.

“For what?”

“I shouldn’t have come. You obviously don’t want me here.”, she hugged herself, maybe against the cold, “I’ll leave.”

“No, don’t.”, fuck that sounded rushed. “I mean, don’t leave if you don’t want, you’ve done nothing wrong. I’m just acting like an asshole.”

He could hear her chuckle next to him.

“No change from college then.”

“Yea.”, he took a drag from the cigarette, “Still the same.”

Silence. Stretching.

“You… uhm… Why did you act like you didn’t know me? Back at the photoshoot.”

“I guess for the same reason you did.”, Petra shrugged, “I didn’t even know if you remembered me, it was some years. So, I waited, but you didn’t say anything, so I just rolled along with it.”

Great, so they were both acting stupid.

“Levi,”, she began, “why did you leave like that, back in college. One day you just stopped showing up for classes, cut all contact, moved away from the dorm. You even changed your phone number. Why?”

“I guess I wanted to leave that life behind. I had to start working, full-time, there were…. circumstances I couldn’t predict. It forced me to change the way I lived.”

“Always so secretive,”, there was a ghost of smile on Petra’s lips, “will you tell me about those circumstances?”

“Sure, but not today. How about we meet tomorrow?”

She wouldn’t look at him, and he wouldn’t look at her, but together, watching the sky, they felt an understanding between them, one they both wanted so much.

“Sounds great.”

There were fireworks outside, and those who wanted to see went out of the bar, the lights illuminating their faces. Midnight was just passing, according to Eren’s phone, and he made sure that he shared this year’s first kiss with the only woman he loved, ignoring Armin’s pained groaning. Mikasa’s lips molded into his perfectly, and it did remind him of the first times they kissed. Frankly, they both sucked at it, since it was their first time, but together, they got better. With her, everything was better, really. Ymir followed his example, as did some other couples, but not Sasha. She looked at the lights, a new goal forming in her mind. She would find Gabi, she would make her talk. Whatever the cost, she’s going to get to the bottom of this. That was her New Year’s resolution. Wherever you are hiding, Gabi, she swore, I’ll get to understand you.

[islareeveswriting]

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Harry felt numb.

It wasn’t from the bitter cold he was surrounded by as he stood outside the club, restless on his legs as he waited for the taxi he’d called, but rather from the sudden depreciation in adrenaline coursing through his veins alongside, and seemingly in just as larger quantity, as his blood. Normally, such low levels of adrenaline would go unnoticed. They were standard, commonplace, Harry was back to equilibrium. But his hands were still shaking with the rush that had burned through him as hot as lava as he sunk into a low. It was the worst comedown Harry knew, and it was only made worse by the look that had been on Molly’s face as she’d dragged Ryan away from Harry and out of the bar.

In the heat of the moment, as Harry saw red and zoned in only on the way Ryan was talking to Molly and the look on his face, Harry didn’t know how he’d gone from a few warning words to having Ryan pinned against the wall. However, as he looked back, Harry could remember every second of it, from the tone of Ryan’s voice, to the way Molly’s face fell with it, to Ryan shrugging Harry’s hand away and the disgusted look that had registered over his face. It had been fifteen minutes, maybe more, maybe less, Harry couldn’t be sure, but stood outside, the early October night chilling his extremities, Harry could see every second of what had gone before perfectly.

Even if Harry had wanted to stop and think about what he was saying when he called Ryan out on the way he spoke to Molly, he didn’t think he’d have been able to. It was instinct, it came as naturally as scratching an itch, or running from something dangerous. Harry couldn’t help himself, and he couldn’t bite his tongue as easily when Ryan’s cruel words were aimed at Molly rather than himself. The six or so southern comfort’s Harry had sunk surely hadn’t helped, but then Harry wasn’t entirely sure they’d made a difference either. Before Harry really knew it, he’d had Ryan against the wall, holding him there with ease, focused only on his smug face, completely ignorant to the commotion he’d left behind him. Harry seethed, and just thinking about it again made him feel no different.

Regret wasn’t the right word, it was too strong. However, there was something niggling away at Harry as he stood alone, waiting for a taxi and wishing Molly would answer his call, or at least a text, and he knew he only found himself in that situation because of how he’d reacted. Yet still, he didn’t regret it.

Sorry felt more like it. Not for what he’d done or what he’d said, but for how it so clearly made Molly feel, the position it put them in, the wedge it would surely drive, and how it had forced her away to lick Ryan’s wounds when he was the one who had been putting her down. When it came to Ryan, and what he’d hissed at him, how forcefully he’d held him back, Harry was about as far from sorry as he could possibly be. There wasn’t an ounce of regret in Harry for what he’d done to Ryan, as far as Harry could see, he deserved it all.

It didn’t make sense to Harry at all, how head over heels Molly was for Ryan, when all Harry saw all night was an immature man who wanted to show Molly off for all the wrong reasons, and put her down every chance he got. How he didn’t lose himself when Molly spoke about her new project and made her ideas sound as alive and tangible as she was, Harry couldn’t fathom. Molly was electric with it, magnetic, and when she laughed Harry couldn’t take his eyes off her, but he saw the way Ryan seemed to be finding anything else to look at and talk about. Maybe it was jealousy, but Harry didn’t like the way they looked together, they looked as disjointed as they seemed, and Harry knew Molly deserved so much better.

“Alright mate?” Harry turned to the slightly slurred voice, not at all surprised to see Jimmy waltzing towards him out of the club. There was a cigarette behind his ear that Jimmy reached for and lit eagerly with a lighter that seemed to appear from nowhere in his hand. Jimmy stopped walking to Harry to light his smoke, and Harry wondered, as he watched Jimmy sway from side to side a little, how on earth the intoxicated, bean pole of a man, had managed to hold Harry back as Ryan was pulled from the bar by the person Harry wanted to run after, who he couldn’t take his eyes off.

“Yeah all good.” Harry half smiled, as Jimmy joined him at last, the cigarette plumeing smoke around the pair of them as Jimmy inhaled deeply. “Sorry about that back there.” Harry uttered, pressing the button on his phone once more just in case he’d not heard it go off amongst Jimmy’s arrival on the pavement. Still nothing though, and Harry’s heart sunk a little more, yet again.

“Oh don’t worry about it, about time someone gave him what he’s been asking for.” Jimmy shrugged, talking through mouthfuls of smoke that fell past his lips as easily as the alcohol affected words. Harry wondered if Jimmy hadn’t partaken in a few choice substances, and the vodka red bulls he stunk of, if he’d be as open about his feelings towards Ryan. It didn’t seem like he was saying things he hadn’t at least been thinking along time, but Harry didn’t get the feeling he’d ever said anything of the sort out loud.

“He’s a complete dick all the time then?” Harry asked, though it felt rhetorical, sure he knew the answer before Jimmy nodded silently as he inhaled another drag simultaneously.

“I think so, but she doesn’t so I guess that’s all that matters, I guess.” Harry chuckled at the repetition, though he wasn’t entirely sure it didn’t happen purely because Jimmy was trying to convince himself that if Molly was happy, that was all that mattered. Harry had been trying to do the same, all night, and the smile Molly shot Ryan’s way every so often nearly did it for Harry. But then he noticed how hollow it was, and how the Molly he was getting to know seemed a million miles away from the one he was seeing with Ryan around. It was far easier for Harry to see that Molly wasn’t as happy as she was hoping people thought she was, perhaps it was even easier for him to see it than it was for Molly to admit. It was the only rational answer Harry could come to.

“Do you think she got home ok?” Harry thought out loud, because he needed to know, and it was all he needed to know. It was the only reason he was so desperate for Molly to answer his calls, or respond to his messages. He didn’t need to say sorry yet, he didn’t need to talk or for anyone to explain anything, he just needed to know Molly was home safe. Even if that meant she was tucked up in bed with Ryan.

“Molly?” Jimmy asked with one raised eyebrow. Harry just nodded quietly. “Definitely, you don’t need to worry about her.” Jimmy smiled, and Harry got the impression there was a story there, like Jimmy knew all too well Molly could get herself home safely. He probably did know that, and Molly more than likely could get home safely, but still Harry wanted to know for certain. He couldn’t help it and it wasn’t special treatment. No one of significance in Harry’s life got away without letting him know they’d got where they were going, where they leaving him behind, safely.

A shiny black Ford Mondeo pulled up at the kerb in front of Harry and Jimmy, distracting Harry from his concern over Molly for a few seconds as he checked it was the taxi he’d called. It was, and Harry was relieved, at least he’d be in his bed soon, even if he was sure it would be a rather sleepless night, all things considered. Harry turned back for Jimmy who was finishing up his cigarette, taking the final few drags in quick succession.

“Wanna share this?” Harry offered, standing up from the open window.

“Nah don’t worry I’ll walk.” Jimmy told Harry, after taking the final puff of his cigarette and dropping it to the floor to stomp it out. Harry didn’t know Jimmy very well, and vice versa, so Jimmy had no grounds to know that there was no way Harry was going to be leaving Jimmy to walk home alone. Not knowing if Molly had gotten home ok was already one too many people for Harry to lie in bed worrying about. He didn’t need to add Jimmy to that list.

“Come on, I’ve got to go past yours anyway, you may as well get in.” Harry half lied. It was a roundabout way to get to Harry’s place, via the tall townhouse Harry remembered well from the door-fixing. It was certainly the long way home, but Harry wouldn’t say it was out of his way either. For Harry the ten minute detour was the better option when next to leaving Jimmy on his own.

“You sure?” Jimmy questioned for good measure, though Harry could see the thought of getting in a taxi and being home in ten minutes, was vastly favourable to what had to be at least a twenty minute walk. Harry just nodded to answer Jimmy’s question before he opened the passenger door of the car and slid into the seat, glancing over his shoulder as Jimmy got into the seat behind him.

There wasn’t a lot of chat between any of them as they drove. The driver was about as grumpy as Harry could imagine, just on the greyer side of middle aged and stinking of cigarettes. If Harry hadn’t been so caught up in his own thoughts he might have engaged conversation to try and cheer the man up, asked about a wife, children, maybe even grandchildren, if he’d had a good night, maybe found out why he was so miserable. But Harry was too occupied by his own thoughts, and so the drivers mood and any interest in his life was far from the front of Harry’s mind.

The roads were dead, but that was no surprise considering the hour, and it took them no longer than the five minutes Harry had anticipated to get Jimmy to the house. In the dark it looked different, not quite as elegant or regal, just another brick building on another narrow street, lined by cars that only made it tighter. There was a single light on, the front bedroom letting out an orange glow bright enough to make the little garden out front shine as well. The curtains were shut, closing off the outside world, but Harry had a good guess at who’s room it was and the sort of thing that might be happening behind the curtains.

“Harry.” Jimmy’s voice was snappy enough to clap Harry out of his thoughts and how they made his jaw tighten. “Some cash.”

“Oh no, it’s fine mate, you can buy me a drink next time.” Harry insisted, nudging Jimmy’s hand away with the five pound note clutched in it.

“Fine by me.” Jimmy chuckled, shoving the note back in his pocket and tapping Harry on his shoulder. Harry just smiled as Jimmy thanked the driver and got out the car. The driver waited for Jimmy to get through the front door, which Harry was more than grateful for as once Jimmy had disappeared Harry unclipped his seatbelt.

“I’m gonna walk mate, thanks though.” Harry announced, rifling for some money in his pocket. The metre read six pound forty, but the closest Harry could find was a twenty. “Keep the change, thanks mate.” Harry rushed from the car before the driver could even thank him, dying for fresh air.

One last time Harry checked his phone before putting it on silent, hoping that if he couldn’t hear it, irony would come into play and it would ring and she’d leave a voicemail to let him know she was ok, and she was home, and she’d talk later. Harry hoped, because suddenly regret was sinking in and it made him feel ill.

_____________

Thoughts? Theories? Hit me up. I love hearing them and I’m so grateful for all the love you guys have been showing this. 

We’re nearly back where we left off so get excited for new things!

[ritacaroline]

In The Light           Jimmy Page           Fan Fiction            Part 33

Part 33  Pet Return

About a week after Christmas, Jim and Jill were driving home from a few stores in town. Jill was at the wheel, driving the white vette. She loved that car and felt incredible driving it. It had quite a bit of power under the hood and made her feel extremely cool. The vette really grabbed the road. Not to mention she had Jimmy Page next to her in the passenger seat, who was enthralled by her beauty and spirit. How much cooler could a woman feel ? That level of cool probably doesn’t exist. She had had a few more chances to practice driving on the left side of the road during the previous week, and finally felt she was ready to roll in traffic. Jim was ok with letting her drive as long as she was serious when she said she felt comfortable.

As she approached the driveway to their home and began to turn into it, they noticed something moving around at the top of the drive. As they got closer to the house, they realized it was a little dog. So, they got out and Jimmy went over to it carefully and slowly. He spoke to it sweetly and finally picked it up. It was gentle, tiny and a little frightened. It seemed to be a soft little baby beagle. Jill loved dogs and got up close to the little guy, looking at the tags around his neck. One side of the tag said, “Jake” and the other side had a phone number. So naturally, they brought him indoors.

“Oh, he’s so adorable !” said Jill. Jim was not as thrilled, but a puppy is always happy to have around. And soon, he’d be back with his owners, so Jimmy didn’t complain. “Jilly, why don’t you call the number ? And set up the pick up ? I have quite a few things I need to get to. I’ll be in the studio.”

“Sure, no problem,” she said.

She set a bowl of water near little Jake and dialed the number. A pleasant woman’s voice answered.

Jill said, “Yes, hello. We found a puppy named Jake in our driveway, he’s fine by the way.”

Exasperatedly the woman said, “Oh, thank God !  Thank you so very much for calling ! My little son has been so upset since the pup ran off a few hours ago !  My name is Nell. I’m here at 560 Pentington. Are you nearby ?”

“Yes. And I’m Jill. We live at 562, so you must be next door.” she said.

“Oh, I’m so grateful you found him, and that he hasn’t wandered far at all. What a relief !  We just got him a week ago for our son for Christmas. And the pup has been so hyper and tricky, … he outsmarted us this morning and escaped.  We tried for more than an hour to find him, but no luck.   We needed a short break, and came home. You called just at the right time while we’re home. We were just about to go out again to search, just now !” said Nell.

“Well, I can walk him over if you like.” said Jill. “Thank God you were careful enough to have a tag on him so soon, or it would’ve been a lot harder to locate you !”

Nell said, “Yes, yes. I haven’t been in charge of a dog before ever and I’m learning some serious lessons right now about keeping him safe and secure.  And sure, please come over, I’m here. If you’re not busy, would you come in for tea ?”

“Sure, I’d like to. Thanks.” said Jill.

Jill went into the home studio where Jimmy was working with some recording equipment. And she softly asked if she could come in.

He said, “Sure darling, come on in.  And thanks for being so sweet to ask if you could come in. While you’re standing here I’ll just show you quickly, see this light right here ? When I’m making a recording, the light will be red. That’s how you would know to not say anything or come in unexpectedly. Because it would most likely ruin the recording. But, if the light’s not red, come on in. If something’s urgent, or there’s an emergency, sure, interrupt anytime, in that case.”

“Ok, no problem. I’ll be mindful of that, I don’t want to wreck any of your work.  But Jim, I wanted to tell you, that I’m going to head over to the next door neighbor’s house. The puppy belongs to them and Nell, the woman there, invited me to visit. So I’m bringing Jake, the dog, back to them now.” she said, still about 20 feet away from him.

He was sitting in an office type chair that leaned backward. Jimmy looked at her and opened his arms to her, as a request for her to come to him. And she came close and leaned down to him. He gently put his arms around her and pulled her into his lap. He pulled her in close to himself and began kissing her face and nuzzling her near her ear. He had his face in her hair and was inhaling the soft scent while he kissed her lips. His sweet breath and his soft voice against her neck was intoxicating. She ran her fingers through his shiny soft hair and kissed his delicious lips a few times. Just a taste. She had told the neighbor she’d be there in a few. He knew she was on her way out and let go of his hold on her. Jill pulled herself away even though he was luscious. He was addictive.  Jill told him softly, “I would touch you and caress you and kiss you all day long, if it was possible. You’re irresistible.”  And he got the most sweet satisfied smile on his face. He said, “Baby, when you get back later, I’m going to show you how I feel about you.”

Jill asked, “In bed ?”

And he said “Yeah,.…or anywhere you like, honey.“  And he had her heart pounding with his seductive statement.  When she looked in his sparkling alluring eyes, she pretty much melted every time. So, reluctantly, she pulled away and out to the main area to get the puppy.

Next Part 34 :  https://ritacaroline.tumblr.com/post/175184953591/in-the-light-jimmy-page-fan-fiction

Chapter Index :

https://ritacaroline.tumblr.com/Fan%20Fiction

[thepermanentrainpress]

THE PERMANENT RAIN PRESS INTERVIEW WITH JOHN O’CALLAGHAN

“You can get so used to being in a bus and being in a band that brings people to shows – but it’s always just as easy to remember the times you didn’t have that stuff. I think that’s what is important to remember, for our sake. To stay humble, and at least stay hungry.”

It was one of several notions John O’Callaghan shared just a few minutes into our interview, and a few hours before he and the rest of The Maine took to the stage in Vancouver—their first time in nearly three years. “The shows are always sick,” he says, noting that while the movie theatre seats of the venue they’ve played on their past few visits impede the punk rock spirit, they welcome a greater challenge in engaging the crowd.

His only other recollection of the city? “I remember watching Interstellar for the first time,” he laughs. “That was a good film.”

For O’Callaghan and The Maine, longevity has served them well; an eleven-year tenure has seen the band traverse the globe and branch into other avenues of content creation. They recently celebrated the first anniversary of their latest record, Lovely Little Lonely. In contrast to past releases, its framework came together on O’Callaghan’s computer versus the piano, guitar, and voice memos he so often recorded on his phone. “I got Pro Tools and a bunch of the necessary materials in the digital world to make songs sound like songs, and not just a dude in a garage playing on the piano and recording it on his phone,” tells O’Callaghan. “I feel like there were a lot more structured ideas coming into the process.”

While the group has toyed with instrumental transitions in the past, LLL is their first album to incorporate formal interludes. The intoxicating “Bad Behaviour” falls into a placid “Black Butterflies and Déjà Vu” prelude; “Little” into deeply nostalgic cut “Sound of Reverie.” Sustaining that fluidity was a conscious effort on their part and, like the draw and release of a single breath, the record truly feels like less of a compilation and more of an experience.

Already in the planning stages of their next record, O’Callaghan assures new concepts will once again be brought into the fold. “I think it’s really important to change the process up every time… you’ll get too complacent if you don’t.”

At the time of this interview, the Fry Your Brain with The Maine tour had kicked off a week prior. And after each show – much like every show of past tours – they stay long after to interact with fans before retiring to a bus in which life is much less glamorous. “I got my first shower yesterday, which was nice,” says the frontman, adding that most venues don’t have the amenity. Hotel rooms are for the occasional day-off and primarily hygienic purposes; most days, like today, are spent in cozier quarters—"getting each other sick.”

Style and sound evolve, but the band’s passion for music remains constant—something they attribute to an earnest fanbase and staying true to themselves. “With art in general, I think you should be creating what it is that you’d like to see created,” O’Callaghan says of striking a balance between challenging oneself, and not trying too hard to be different. “We have the luxury of having a dynamic that won’t allow it to sound like something it’s not; we’re constricted and constrained by our abilities and our talents within the five of us. We can’t manipulate the guitar any other way than the five of us can, collectively. I can’t sing any better than I can actually sing.”

“That’s why we’ve always looked up to bands like the Rolling Stones – and I personally look up to Neil Young and Mick Jagger and Tom Petty – because there’s a big difference between a singer that hits all the correct notes and a singer that does what they can with what they have, and makes it their own,” he continues. “That’s not discrediting their talents or their abilities. But I mean, Mick Jagger… he doesn’t have a good voice.” [laughs] “He doesn’t. But he has an incredible voice because it’s so unique. I think that we’re in a position now where we won’t let it go to a place that doesn’t feel genuine and that doesn’t feel like us. That’s hopefully what people have respected about the process and attached themselves to.”

And what people have connected with is more than a band, but a community. Their self-run label and management team, 8123, supports volunteer initiatives prior to select show dates; Garrett and Pat host a podcast in which they talk to friends in the industry—or family, in the case of Pat’s mom. The Maine is the first serious band O’Callaghan has been a part of, with camaraderie dating back to middle school in Tempe, Arizona. “Jared and I had science class together… we’ve always felt that sense of community with one another,” tells O’Callaghan. It only made sense to extend that energy to their fanbase. “We are in such a position of privilege as opposed to other bands because we don’t just live and die by The Maine. The message is bigger than we are, and people are creating it as we’re going. It’s really cool to see it spread and go from a couple of guys smoking cigarettes on a parking garage to people all over the world, keeping that spirit alive.” He pauses. “Not the cigarette thing—don’t smoke cigarettes.” [laughs]

Following a quick stint in Europe, the band will be walking the line, slinging CDs all summer long on Vans Warped Tour.

Oh—and playing one of the main stages, too.

“Before I even had anything to do with music, I was a baseball player. I was just a cat in high school, listening to music first and foremost. That’s what I am – just a fan of music in general.” Even as the Arizona natives ascend in festival billing, they never veer from taking advantage of what it represents: an opportunity to spread their noise to crowds willing and eager to listen.

With their matching attire and ‘why would you pay money to meet a human being?’ tent turning heads in 2016, one wouldn’t expect anything less for this final cross-country run. “It’s this weird line… we don’t ever want to be pretentious, but we’re just so ‘meh’ about so many things that it’s important for us to make it known we’re comfortable with what we’re doing, and not affected by all of the other stuff,” O’Callaghan says. “So I think we’re just going to drive home that point and be bratty, but hopefully in a non-confrontational way. I’m sure it will be fun—we’re going to at least have fun.”

O’Callaghan has another project, John the Ghost, with a new book coming out in June. A Thought a Day is a year-long companion; 365 @johnmaine tweets, hand-picked and rooted in personal disposition. “I’m usually talking to myself when I’m tweeting, so it’s really important to have those to look back on for myself,” shares the frontman. “Nick Santino helped me design the inside and the cover, so it won’t be just a boring flip-it-and-there’s-text. I’m excited for people to see it.” As his stirring one-liners continue to amass thousands of ‘likes’ on Twitter, it felt appropriate to gauge his thoughts on the rise of the Insta-poet: commended for its unfiltered honesty and accessibility in today’s generation, others mock and critique the compositions for those very reasons. “It’s as simple as, turn it off if you don’t want to see it,” says O’Callaghan, voicing his support for the budding artist. “When I was growing up, that shit was just called being mean. If people are listening, keep doing it. Don’t be apologetic.”

For our signature ice cream question, O’Callaghan chooses butter pecan—a flavour he didn’t enjoy in his youth but has since warmed to. “It’s kind of like those old platitudes. You don’t think they make sense, or you think they’re corny ‘cause everybody says them, and then as you get older it’s like wait a second, there’s a reason this shit has been drilled and drilled into my head,” he tells. “My dad always loved butter pecan ice cream and I was like ‘ew, butter and nuts? You’re crazy.’ And then as I got older, I got over it.”

In many ways, The Maine is the same band they were eleven years ago—the same five guys, gripping guitar hooks and lingering nostalgia. But a natural progression in sound has given them a deep back catalogue to work with, their set list later that night ranging from 2008 ballad “Whoever She Is” to LLL’s breezy anthem “How Do You Feel?” O’Callaghan gave a couple shout-outs to concertgoers celebrating a birthday, and the band even improvised 20 seconds of the elusive, never-to-be-played-in-full-again “Give It To Me.”

There was no encore—unsurprising for a group that continues to challenge the norm in their laid-back interactions; charismatic live experience cherished as much by the band as it is by their spectators.

Reciprocity at its finest.

Written by: Natalie Hoy Photographed by: Jade Kenny