#really I need to figure out how to push value around more when I do faces - I've got a better hang of it for other stuff

[riteliso]

ALRIGHT jumping back in here, uh, yesterday got a little weird so I'm late to return but you don't mind because there's like 2 people reading this as I post it and maybe 8 people reading it total

Y'see, Catra looks very pensive here. I don't remember ENTIRELY what I was gonna say for this bit yesterday, but I remember I was gonna say that Catra is always mad so she's lying. I can't remember if I was saying that as a bit or not, though.

Probably a half bit, like most of the things I say

Either way, her insistence that she isn't mad is what draws Entrapta in, and Entrapta's inability to tell when Catra is mad is what gets her thrown on Beast Island in the end. Entrapta's inability to understand emotion and push past it actually assists her in becoming friends with Hordak, and makes it more difficult to become friends with Catra.

Do with that information what you will, feel free to read it as Catra being more evil, I don't particularly care

I will, however, give MY hypothesis to why this exactly is.

I think Catra doesn't really see any of her relationships as, like, real. Especially not friendships.

So when her friends aren't doing exactly as she says exactly how she wants it done, it's not a disagreement, it's insubordination. And I don't think that's exclusive to work.

I mean, Catra hates herself and still thinks she's above everyone, you know?

When her bubble gets popped, when she gets called a bad friend, that's the reason why it hits her so hard. Someone she saw as an inferior fuck-up just stepped up to her level and told her to her face something she can't really disagree with.

There's a lot of different kinds of intelligence. Sometimes we don't value the right ones. Yes, Catra is a scheming little villain who loves to ride out a good plan, and Scorpia is completely incapable of that, but Scorpia and Bow are really the only members of our cast with a notable amount of emotional intelligence.

Adora and Catra very much lack emotional intelligence. So does Glimmer, and so does Entrapta, but those both become more relevant MUCH later on.

I do appreciate that she's pensively planning, here, pacing back and forth. It's clear she's not quite yet figured out what she wants to do here.

I'm sure someone else could have a lot more to say about this note of the character-- I just think it's very nice. She likes to take evil robots, make them more powerful, and make them nicer.

She lives in her own little world, but the show doesn't treat that as a flaw. It's how she is. If you need her help, you need to wrestle her away from herself like it's nobody's business, but that doesn't stop her from being a good person and a wonderful friend.

I don't know how to use language properly here-- you're ALLOWED to be inconvenient. We all are. We're human beings. We're messy and scared and none of us REALLY know what we're doing. Flaws are subjective, and if your flaws make you happy and don't hurt you, you shouldn't need to change them.

Like, I have plenty of flaws that I DON'T like, and you can't prove I just typed all of them out and then deleted them after I realized that wasn't the point of what I was saying.

But as far as flaws I DO like go, I am a SUCKER for mania. I love getting absorbed in something and finding out every little detail about it and writing until I'm starving myself and the people around me get WORRIED. Okay I should probably tone that aspect of it down a bit but the point I'm making is I wouldn't be a better person without that. I'd just be more-- palatable. I'd lose more than I'd gain.

Entrapta is wonderful. She's a handful, but she knows what she loves and she absorbs herself in it. It really doesn't matter what situation you put her in, because she'll always find something to do and a way to love what she's doing.

I need what she has

How do I login to catjerk@yahoo which of my passwords did I use was it Ador@sux.1 or SWbl0ws or 1.r34lly.m155.h3r.s0m371m35.

Nvm it was an autogen or someth cos idk what else dyg11ly14h5pj705 could be

We've been over this, after force captain is "Shadow Weaver." It doesn't have a title that's just what it is

I'll help you out here, the LEFT goes in your LEFT and the RIGHT goes in your RIGHT

idiot

This is a fair play honestly if my children didn't put away their toys I would make them enemies of the state

You can't actually hide being a good person. You'll always slip up. You'll always show, accidentally, that you care.

But no good deed goes unpunished. Even once Hordak finds some amount of goodness inside of him he's torn to pieces.

Catra's always been a good person deep down, but here we see her finally bring some amount of it to the surface.

Shadow Weaver doesn't deserve her kindness, but sometimes that just can't matter.

She's seeing someone in pain, and for the first time she's had the time to herself and the space to think that she's willing to use some of her words to communicate.

Like I said earlier, she's of the opinion that her and Shadow Weaver are equals in the ways that she values. It's why she tries to hold onto that feeling, and why she's willing to extend an olive branch.

Good people don't belong in the fright zone. Good people don't belong in the Horde. She's practically told that to her face countless times later by prime, as she continues to insist that she's not good. That she's everything she says she is. A conqueror. Someone who seeks to destroy and control.

And nobody will ever believe her

Because between all the biting and the torment and the theatrics

whenever she takes a single breath

there she is.

One thing she very much got from shadow weaver was a sensitivity to pity. I've certainly got that too, and I'm not spectacular at hiding it either. I don't really have anything much to say on it, though. It's hard to accept warmth when your blanket is so chewed and thin.

I wonder if any of this is true. Like, at ALL. Shadow Weaver is constantly lying, but she seems to drop SOMETHING before she speaks here.

I don't know if Catra is just incidental to her, or if she actually values her as a weapon and a tool. We know they were both her wards, but she clearly always valued the powers that Adora would hold a lot more than whatever Catra would grow to be capable of.

So was Catra just there so Adora would actually pay attention and enjoy her time training, or did Shadow Weaver actually have any hopes for Catra?

Sometimes when someone hurts you you're desperate to know that at least they value you. At least they care.

But you almost never get to know.

Something we don't see a TON of from Bow outside of super joke-y contexts, here he's fretting and spiraling and believing things outside of his control were his own fault. Also you like how crusty that image is? I probably coulda found a better version of it but I didn't

This is the sharpest fucking sword she drags it so gingerly across the surface

chalk would have hardly left a mark

I don't know anything about parenting but I have no clue how to raise a kid who feels like they can talk to you

I hear about people who have, like, ACTIVELY good relationships with their parents where they actively enjoy doing things together and it feels so alien to me

I think this is a good thing to brush on because it's something most people brush against. It's hard to talk to a figure of authority at be best of times, and it's even harder if it's someone you can't escape and someone you love.

An interesting parallel we have here is Catra opening a dialogue with Shadow Weaver, attempting to be open, and being called a disappointment, vs Glimmer refusing to open up a dialogue, digging her heels in, and getting reassured that she isn't one.

As time goes on, we see how resistant Glimmer is to change. How unwilling she is to become a different person. In comparison, we see how much Catra fights for things to change, but can only change so fast, and not always for the best. Neither of them wants to change themselves, but Glimmer is happy with her environment and Catra isn't. In trying to change her situation, Catra changes herself slowly, while Glimmer is majorly static until she can't possibly stay the same. This isn't a failing on Glimmer's part, I'm not one of those insane fans who says "uhm, if you're looking or a problematic member of the group, maybe look inward, sweaty," or anything like that, it's just something she struggles with.

Meanwhile Bow and Adora are great with change. They don't always enjoy it the most, but throw anything their way and they'll manage. They don't get stuck in their ways-- Bow is much healthier with his approach, but Adora is adaptable. Catra's good with small changes as long as they better her specific situation, and Glimmer can't really handle change much at all.

Anyway

Good character beat, but I don't like its presentation. Maybe it could have been helped with more voice direction, or more work with Angella trying to get a word in edgewise, but the sudden blurting of this twist is just kinda trope-y in a way that the series tends to be better at navigating. I'm a snob so the first time I heard this I probably snorted like an asshole or something

The scene is capable of making me plenty emotional NOW, but the first line is the low point, which isn't ideal.

Also I never remember how Glimmer gets healed if I'm honest but hey I'll remember when I see it

ALRIGHT SO

Here's how we're doing things, right? We're gonna go one episode at a time, and I'm gonna give my thoughts whenever they come up. This is a train of thought type beat, alright? Unlike my usual grandstanding authorial and analytical self, this re-watch is purely for the rant factor. If you don't know me, and you just happened upon this thread because you like reading she-ra rewatches, hello. I'm a writer from Canada who found she-ra in 2025 and is currently on her sixth watch through. From that, hopefully you can discern that I like this show, even if I'm likely gonna criticize parts of it. We good to go? Good. We start with S01 E01.

RIGHT, THE SWORD PART 1! A zoom in, with an angelic singing being drowned out by digital bloopy fright zone vibes, and then Adora being a fuckin dweeb as her leitmotif plays in a decidedly crystiline synth-y tone.

Now, what do we learn from this? This, aside from one gripe I'll have more to speak on later, is an excellent introduction. With the music alone we're essentially taken from the beauty of the planet, the overwhelming dread of the fright zone, and then into a hopeful tune that isn't FREE from these sort of digital themes in the music, but is very defined and separate FROM them.

This isn't gonna be one of those things where I praise literally every single fuckin thing so keep your panties on, I'm not gonna full-on overanalyzing avatar this shit, but the most important parts of a story are the beginning and the ending.

Now, when I say that, I am speaking pragmatically. Every part of every story is important-- but when it comes to what people remember, what they love, what they never shut up about-- it's the start and the end. You need to nail the take-off and the landing, people will forget the turbulence from the rest of the trip.

Now, what does THIS bitch's intro tell us about her? Well, a lot, honestly. Most of what we know about Adora at this point is she plays by the rules, but she is a notably goofy person. She's goofy, but she's unwilling to goof-OFF too much.

And while we get a taste of the rivalry they have instantly, with "That's low, even for you." "You know nothing's too low for me~"

We instantly see that that is not the CORE of their relationship.

I'd like to praise the voice direction in this show for the first of many times here. The voice actors do amazing work in this, and the direction can be felt throughout.

"Come on, you look stupid hanging there" can obviously be a seen as a strange first line to show the warmth these two share, but the inflection from Catra's voice actor, AJ Mikalcha, makes it read as downright sweet.

Also don't get used to me using names of the crew besides ND Stevenson because I'm so awful with names I was still calling Catra Katara half the time on my second re-watch and I was like 90% of the way to realizing I kinned her at that point

Also don't make fun of me for kinning Catra there's no RESPONSE to people making fun of you for kinning Catra THAT DOESN'T MAKE YOU SEEM MORE LIKE FUCKING CATRA OKAY

Anyway, the following scene makes it clear that this is not a one-way dynamic. The two banter, and it's clear Adora knows how to get under Catra's skin and annoy her as well. This is notable in a few places MUCH further on, but it is a difference worth highlighting NOW.

Once Adora leaves, Catra's primary goal is still to get under her skin. She's angry about it, she's mean about it, but she's still just doing what she's always done. The relationship between the two doesn't actually change as much as the context does. I'd say the relationship itself doesn't change much until the final season, at a scene I'm sure I'll have a lot to say about.

On the flip-side, Adora's goal when it comes to Catra is simply to fight her off. But that's not all there is. At points, it's clear that Adora holds some sort of REVERENCE for Catra, and while Catra is very capable of very mean things, don't get me wrong, Adora sees Catra as more of a threat than she realistically is.

At a few moments I'll point out she also relishes in getting under Catra's skin, but admittedly those are few and far between.

People have gone over this introduction billions of times, so I won't BORE you to death with it, but Shadow weaver's introduction does hint at a lot of what we'll learn later. I think it's very notable that while Shadow weaver brings a dark gloom that encompasses both our leads, her vile tendrils only dare to touch Catra. We learn the specifics of the dynamic these three have later, but it is a very unique and terrible situation to be the least favourite of an abusive guardian. Especially if you are repeatedly reminded of that fact.

I'm not gonna go over all the body language shit I've seen other text posts about it there's plenty of them a lot of focus in this show goes into tiny details where characters are constantly reacting to the world around them, and very rarely do we get lame stretches where anyone's face is just frozen and unflinching while they listen to someone else.

with all due respect to the setting at this point in time the bright moon rebellion is so pathetically anemic it's the two teens, some movie night lesbians, an immortal princess queen, and a bunch of fucking trees.

And you'd think the one carrying the team would be THE IMMORTAL PRINCESS QUEEN, BUT NO, ITS THE FUCKING TREES DOING ALL THE GOD DAMNED WORK

This introduction is fine. I don't particularly like it, nor have any strong feelings about it. It establishes the relationship between glimmer and her mother, but besides that it doesn't honestly do much. And don't come at me with "Uh, all it needs to do is establish that relationship?" Yeah, no shit, but we just had a better introduction to our other lead characters. And yes, those are the MAIN leads, the sort of heart of the show, but that doesn't mean that the other characters are unimportant. Glimmer's development later on is truly interesting, and Bow becomes a massively inspiring character. Fun jokey times are fine or whatever to show that they're immature and don't know the first thing about war, in contrast to our full-blown child soldiers raised from birth in the fright zone, but we really don't learn anything particularly INTERESTING about our best friend squad compadres in their intro, nor do we really see any of it until episode 2, to be frank.

This is something we don't actually see much of-- Catra has this ideal of being a conqueror, but it's very clear that she doesn't want that. Her threats are vapid and aimless-- She can enjoy some chaos, sure, but a shit-stirrer isn't gonna use that feces to build brick shithouses that they never intend to fall.

I think this should have been elaborated on more, personally. Catra is comically terrible with authority, and her plan, as stated later, is to wait it out until her and Adora are the ones calling the shots. But we don't really see what she thinks conquering even looks like, and it's not clear whether that's that she hasn't even imagined it and just likes evil words, or if she genuinely wants to rule with Adora as her Queen.

I gravitate towards the first, but that's partially because I wake up and post shit like "I want to destroy the world and rule its dust" and then forget I posted it when someone likes it 5 minutes later. If she do, in fact, as studies point toward, "be just like me fr," then I fully understand. If not, then I'd like to understand.

aw :(

Fuckin dweeb pulling the "my mom doesn't want me hanging out with you anymore" card

HA! Ah, what a bitch. Anyway, she's lashing out, but it's also quite tragic. A lot of people seem to think Adora IS, in some way, a people pleaser, but in reality she just has such an ingrained and violent sense of justice that she wants to right every wrong she has ever and will ever come across. She believes her validity is tied to what she can provide to the world, and she's got a natural sense of charisma, so it's natural for someone who refuses to blend in and naturally tends to put people off like Catra to have this view of her.

In reality, Adora is just-- a good person. And people LIKE good people. She's not a good person with an asterisk-- a good person with terms and conditions-- someone who falls into the definition of a good person while feeling and being treated like something else. Catra is the "a tomato is a fruit" of good people. Adora is just, like, a 1 dollar costco hotdog of a woman. An inarguable good treading water on this earth, no matter how hard it tries to pull her under.

Imagine falling for a brat with mad hops, like a fucking 50 foot vertical, you say you're too tired to play their favourite board game and they go hang out on your neighbour's roof, couldn't be me. Get fucked I guess

Yeah this is sad. Empathy is very much a learned skill, and people who don't learn empathy don't GET happy FOR people. Catra's not a complete person yet. She's not ready to be. That doesn't happen for a really long time, during an exceptionally long manic spiral. We'll get there, calm down, don't think about how far away that is and how much I've already yammered on.

Anyway, if you find yourself getting jealous or annoyed instead of getting happy for people, consider empathy isn't what you thought it was, and that you might still need to work on yourself.

fucking porno framing. Immensely sexual image, really. These bitches violently gay I suppose, I think I'm picking up on that during this sixth re-watch.

Buddy you got no idea how many problems those two already have you literally lose your little tiara at some point I think it ends up in the middle of a tree in space or something it's kinda unclear

Adora elbows her square in the nose during this so to everyone accusing Catra of physical abuse I just want it to be clear that Adora started it :/

Actually I'd like to retract that joke immediately because I know how people get about these two

My feelings are that they are literally child soldiers who were likely raised sparring each-other.

I was raised sparring other children and I ended up fine! Not for war, for Karate. And I didn't end up fine. And neither did they. Anyway, my point isn't even specifically that because this is sci-fi fantasy it's ridiculous to hold real life standards to it, it's more-so that because it's sci-fi fantasy there's extenuating circumstances that are going to affect how these two characters treat each-other. I'll go into hotter takes later, I'm sure, and get people to send me plenty of death-threats, but I'm gonna go into the nuances of exactly what forms Catra's abuse takes, and how it differs given by the separate circumstances we're shown the two in throughout the show.

my girl when I'm tryna live my best life playing as blue toad in mario 3d world

also holy shit we're only like halfway through this I am an AGONIZING yapper jesus fuck

Okay, what to say about lighthope-- well, their first words are "balance must be restored," far before they say Adora's name, so it somewhat lays out their secret priorities for us there. Besides that, I dunno, they got circuits on them? I don't have particularly strong feelings about lighthope, nor their introduction. I think they serve the setting and are written well, I just subjectively am not a sucker for the way they be. Their friendship with Mara is cute tho

I was gonna point out this is cute and how often I do this exact brat tactic but instead we data moshin, nothin wrong with a little data moshin, I'm down

This is the only reason she even wears a ponytail I'd stake my fuckin life on it

Once she leaves the fright zone that thing's fucking vestigial like a tailbone or having "any pronouns" in your bio when it's pretty clear you're very much a "she/they" type of bitch by now

glimmer why don't your windows have glass

or alternatively

how the fuck do you open and close that window

you can absolutely fucking hear her from this distance what on earth are you trying to pull

you a pillow princess tho how many of those arrows are just hitatchi magic wands attatched to a stick with duct-tape after the series ends do you think

The fuck you mean BOTTOM drawer we lookin at left and right here

or is this similar to my pillow princess comment and she's just addressing him and giving him an order

"Bottom; drawer."

It's established later on that he's a tech wiz but at this point in time they don't really give us much to lead us to the fact that he made that fucking thing

she's a freak

yes it's very sweet that she sleeps this way but I don't think it's some bdsm powerplay thing or anything like that, which would honestly be more tolerable, I think she's just like that

like how the way I'd sit in high school was to get two chairs and face them toward each-other then sit cross-legged across both

even if there weren't enough chairs to go around

people would sit on the FLOOR because I wanted to sit criss-cross-applesauce across two chairs, they wouldn't even ask for one of my chairs

also since I was sitting, again, cross-legged, it would have made more sense for ME to sit on the floor

I mean I think I got asked ONCE for one of the chairs and I just said "fine" but besides that people just let me sit on my fuckin throne

She really is kinda dumb, though. Like I ain't complaining, it's a character trait, but like obviously even if just you get in trouble Catra's gonna get blamed, you've seen it like at least once a month for your whole entire life

Mind you, can't really have Catra for the next part, because Catra's reaction to Bow and Glimmer wouldn't be "just let me have the sword" it'd be murder

oh wow we hit the image limit looks like we're doing TWO SEPARATE POSTS FOR THE VERY FIRST EPISODE YEE-HAW!!!!! THIS IS GOING TO TAKE ME FUCKING FOREVER

[plutosunshine]

PLUTO: your personal power

How to find your personal transformative power? Of course, we should look at the Pluto. Pluto is the place where the power of transformation starts. The house it resides in can show us how we can open up our strengths and let them transform our lives. I will look into the Pluto in the houses to answer that question. Of course, there are others placements that show power and strength but I would like to dive deep into the Pluto world. After all, the name of my blog is Plutosunshine!

Also, for those reading this post I offer to dig deep into your Pluto placement (and how it connects with the chart) to know what your personal power is — just 15 dollars. Don’t miss that opportunity!

Pluto in the 1st house

Having Pluto in the 1st house means you're someone who's meant to transform — again and again. You're not here to stay the same or follow the status quo. There's a deep intensity to you, something people can feel even if you don't say much. You've probably noticed that people are drawn to you, or maybe even a little intimidated, and you might not always understand why. That's Pluto — it gives off a powerful, magnetic energy.

To tap into your transformative power, start by really embracing change, even when it feels uncomfortable or chaotic. Life will probably push you through a lot of big shifts — but each one is meant to strip away what's false and bring you closer to your most authentic self. You grow stronger every time you let go of what no longer fits.

Another key part of your power is learning to accept your shadow side — those parts of you that feel too intense, emotional, or misunderstood. The more you own those parts instead of hiding them, the more powerful and grounded you become. Your depth is a gift, not a weakness.

You're also here to be unapologetically real. You don't need to shrink yourself to make others feel at ease. When you walk into a room fully being yourself, people feel your presence. That's part of your impact — you shift the energy just by being there.

Because you're wired to go deep, you're also someone who can heal. When you've worked through your own stuff, you naturally become a guide for others, whether you realize it or not. Your story, your intensity, your ability to rise again — all of that inspires people around you.

Pluto in the 2nd house

Pluto in the 2nd house is all about deep transformation around money, self-worth, values, and control — especially when it comes to your relationship with security and stability.

You’re not the type who just wants to "make money" in a surface-level way. You want to own your power, and for you, money, resources, and possessions can feel like a way to have control over your life. But here’s the thing — Pluto brings transformation through loss and rebirth. So throughout life, you might experience times where you lose something important (money, a job, stability), only to rebuild from the ground up and come back even stronger.

This placement teaches you that real power doesn’t come from what you have — it comes from who you are without it. Once you figure that out, you become unstoppable. You learn how to generate your own value, your own security, and build wealth in a way that feels deeply empowering and aligned with your soul.

There’s also this deep drive to get to the truth of things. You’re not into fluff. You want to know what’s real, what lasts, and what holds value — whether that’s in relationships, finances, or your own self-worth. You might have a talent for seeing through superficial success and knowing what’s truly valuable underneath.

And yeah, there can be some control issues here too — either clinging too tightly to money and material stuff out of fear, or swinging the other way and rejecting it completely. Finding balance is key. You’re meant to learn how to hold power without letting it control you.

At your best, you can become someone who transforms not only your own financial reality but also helps others do the same. You could be amazing at healing people’s money mindset, uncovering hidden talents, or building something valuable from scratch.

Pluto in the 3rd house

Pluto in the 3rd house? That’s deep, powerful stuff when it comes to your mind, communication, and how you process and share information.

You don’t do small talk. You crave real conversations — the kind that cut through the surface and get to the heart of things. When you speak, there’s often a weight to your words. You might not say much unless it matters, but when you do speak? People listen. There's something magnetic in how you express yourself.

Your mind works like an x-ray machine — you see through the noise, the lies, the distractions. You’re probably very observant, possibly quiet at times, but you're always picking up on what's not being said. It’s like you’re tuned into the hidden motives or the emotional undercurrents in conversations.

This placement also points to a strong potential for mental transformation throughout your life. Maybe early on, you dealt with environments that felt intense, controlling, or even toxic — especially related to siblings, school, or how you were allowed to express yourself. But over time, you learn to reclaim your voice and your mind. And once you do? You become incredibly persuasive, powerful, and insightful.

There can also be this compulsive curiosity — like you need to figure out how things work, especially people’s minds or deeper truths. You’d probably be amazing at research, psychology, writing, even occult studies. Anything that lets you dive deep and expose what’s hidden.

But be mindful of how you use your words — because with Pluto here, your voice can be healing or destructive. You have the power to influence people’s thinking, to help them see things in a totally new way. So learning how to wield that power with intention and care is a big part of your journey.

Also — don’t be afraid to let go of old mental patterns. Pluto in the 3rd can hold on to ideas, thoughts, or inner narratives for too long. Transformation happens when you’re willing to challenge what you think you know and open up to deeper truths.

Pluto in the 4th house

Pluto in the 4th house hits deep — this one goes straight to the core of who you are beneath the surface. It’s about your emotional foundation, your family roots, your home life, and your inner world. And with Pluto here, none of that is light or simple.

You probably grew up in an environment that felt intense, secretive, or even emotionally heavy. Maybe there were power dynamics in the family, unspoken rules, or a feeling like you had to protect yourself or stay on high alert. Whatever the story is, your childhood likely shaped you in a big way — and not always in ways you could fully understand at the time.

This placement gives you emotional depth and inner strength that most people can’t even begin to comprehend. You feel things intensely, but you might not always show it on the outside. You’ve learned to guard your inner world, to protect your vulnerabilities. You might keep your true self hidden unless you really trust someone — and even then, it can take time.

One of your biggest transformations in life comes through healing your relationship with your past — your family, your upbringing, and your emotional wounds. You’re meant to dive into all of that, not avoid it. The more you face what’s buried, the more you reclaim your personal power.

You’re also someone who needs a home that feels like a sanctuary. A place where you can go deep, retreat, and fully be yourself. You're not into surface-level comfort — you want a space with soul. And once you’ve done the inner work, you might even be the kind of person who helps others heal emotionally or create a safe space for transformation.

Sometimes Pluto in the 4th brings up themes around control or fear of losing stability — like trying to control your environment or relationships just to feel safe. But real strength comes when you learn to trust yourself emotionally and let go of needing everything to be under your control.

Bottom line: You’re here to transform from the inside out. To face the shadows of the past, rise above them, and build a foundation that’s emotionally solid and truly yours.

Pluto in the 5th house

Pluto in the 5th house brings intensity, passion, and deep transformation to all things related to self-expression, creativity, romance, and even how you experience joy.

This placement gives you a powerful desire to create — not just in the artistic sense, but to put your whole soul into something and watch it come to life. Whether it’s art, writing, music, performance, business, or even how you love someone — you don’t do anything halfway. When you express yourself, it’s raw, real, and magnetic. People can feel that you're not just creating for fun — you're creating from your core.

Romance and love affairs? Yeah... those don’t stay light either. You go all in. Love for you is intense, consuming, and often transformative. You might attract partners who challenge you, awaken you, or force you to confront parts of yourself you didn’t even know were there. There can be power struggles or deep emotional entanglements, but they’re never boring — these relationships are meant to change you.

There’s also this undercurrent of craving significance. Not in an ego way, but in a “I need what I do and who I love to matter” kind of way. Casual doesn’t cut it. You want to feel alive, seen, and fully self-expressed. At the same time, you might fear losing control — over your creativity, your heart, or your sense of self — so you might hold back or keep certain passions hidden until you feel safe.

At your highest expression, you become someone who channels their creativity and passion in a way that moves others. You don’t just entertain or express — you transform through your art, your love, and your joy.

Pluto in the 6th house

Pluto in the 6th house is deep transformation through the day-to-day grind — work, routines, health, service, and how you manage your responsibilities. Sounds practical, right? But Pluto doesn’t do shallow, even in the 6th. This placement means you’re here to evolve through the details of life.

You don’t just “go to work” or “take care of your health” — you feel a powerful, almost obsessive pull to do things well, to be in control of your environment, your workflow, and your body. You might be super focused on productivity, efficiency, or constantly improving yourself. And yeah, there can be perfectionist vibes here — because deep down, you may feel like control equals safety.

At some point in life, though, Pluto will challenge that mindset. There might be times when you burn out, get sick, or feel like your entire daily structure has to be torn down and rebuilt from scratch. That’s Pluto pushing you to transform how you handle stress, self-discipline, and your physical well-being.

You may also attract intense work situations — environments where power dynamics, manipulation, or control issues come into play. But that’s not random. These experiences help you learn how to stand in your own power without getting caught in toxic patterns.

Health-wise, this placement often calls for deep healing, not just physically, but emotionally and energetically. Your body can hold onto stress or emotional baggage, so it's important to pay attention to the root of any imbalances, not just the symptoms. You might even be drawn to alternative or transformative healing methods — like detoxing, shadow work, or energy healing — anything that helps cleanse from the inside out.

You have the potential to be a powerful healer, organizer, or problem-solver — especially once you’ve done the inner work. People may come to you because they sense you don’t just “fix” things — you transform them.

Pluto in the 7th house

Pluto in the 7th house? Oof — this is a powerful one when it comes to relationships. You're not here for light, casual connections. You're here to dive deep, to merge, and to transform through the people you’re closest to.

The 7th house rules partnerships — romantic, business, close one-on-one connections — and with Pluto sitting there, those relationships are often intense, magnetic, and sometimes... a little messy. Power struggles, obsession, deep attraction, and control issues can all show up at some point in your life. But it’s not to punish you — it’s to teach you how to find your own power within relationships, not through them.

You might attract partners who are intense, mysterious, or controlling — or you could be the one holding the reins. Either way, your relationships aren’t surface-level. They shake you, challenge you, and force you to grow. You may even go through major relationship breakdowns that feel like emotional death and rebirth experiences. But with every one, you come out stronger and more self-aware.

There’s also a theme here around learning to balance power — not giving yours away to please others, but also not trying to dominate or fix them. Pluto in the 7th is about finding equal, transformative partnerships — ones where both people grow, evolve, and bring out the deeper layers of each other’s truth.

You're someone who can’t fake connection. You crave realness, loyalty, soul-bonded intensity. When you're in a relationship that feels safe and aligned, you become incredibly loyal, protective, and powerful as a partner. You might even help others face their shadows or break their own patterns — just by being in their life.

If you haven’t already, you'll likely go through at least one life-altering relationship that shifts everything you thought you knew about love and partnership. And that relationship (even if it doesn’t last) will unlock a whole new level of personal power.

Pluto in the 8th house

Pluto in the 8th house is straight-up next-level deep — like, soul-level transformation kind of deep. This is Pluto in its home, so if you have this placement, you’re basically carrying intense, raw, psychic energy that most people can’t even begin to understand. You’re not here to live on the surface — you’re here to die and be reborn, over and over, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically.

This placement gives you a natural connection to the hidden, the taboo, the unseen. You’re drawn to topics most people shy away from: death, rebirth, sex, trauma, power, energy, mysticism, the subconscious. You might have a fascination with psychology, occult stuff, healing, or even money that comes from others (like inheritances, shared resources, investments, etc.).

Emotionally, you feel things with intensity — but you don’t always show it. You’re probably very private, maybe even secretive, because you don’t trust easily. You know how messy people can be under the mask, and you’re not about to hand your soul over unless someone’s earned it. And when you do open up? It’s deep, consuming, life-changing love. No in-between.

With Pluto here, life will likely push you into situations where you’re forced to let go — of control, of attachments, of the idea that you can protect yourself from pain. It may come through relationships, loss, betrayal, or deep emotional experiences that shake you. But through those experiences, you unlock your true power — the kind that comes from facing the dark and surviving it.

There may also be a natural ability to help others through their own transformations. You could be a guide, a healer, a counselor — or just someone whose presence alone makes people confront their shadows and grow. You're not afraid of darkness — you work with it.

If you're not consciously working with this energy, it can come out sideways — jealousy, emotional control, fear of betrayal, or power struggles. But once you own it? You become a force. Like a phoenix that rises from the ashes every damn time.

Pluto in the 9th house

Pluto in the 9th house? Now that’s the placement of a truth-seeker, a belief-breaker, and someone who’s here to completely transform their worldview over the course of their life.

You’re not interested in surface-level knowledge or blindly following what you’ve been taught. You want to dig deep, uncover hidden truths, and challenge the systems — religion, philosophy, culture, education — anything that tells you “this is how it is.” Your mind is built to go beyond that. You want to know — not just believe — and that desire can lead you to explore some seriously deep or even taboo topics.

There’s often a powerful transformation that happens through travel, higher education, or spiritual awakening. It might start with questioning what you were raised to believe. Maybe you were taught one version of the truth growing up — and at some point, it just didn’t fit anymore. So you broke away, maybe even dramatically, and went on your own journey to find what’s real for you.

People with Pluto in the 9th are often drawn to the occult, metaphysics, esoteric studies, psychology, philosophy, or anything that challenges traditional thinking. You might have the soul of a philosopher, teacher, mystic, or rebel scholar — someone who doesn’t just accept ideas but dissects them, transforms them, and helps others do the same.

You also have this intensity when it comes to your personal truth. Once you believe in something, you believe it with everything in you. But part of your growth is learning that beliefs can evolve — that clinging too hard to one “truth” can become its own kind of prison.

You could be a powerful teacher or guide, especially when it comes to helping others see beyond their limits. Your words, your perspective, your insight? It can change people’s lives. But first, you’ve gotta go through your own journey of death and rebirth — mentally, spiritually, even culturally.

Pluto in the 10th house

Now that’s a powerhouse placement. You’re here to transform the world through your presence, your ambition, and the legacy you leave behind. There’s something magnetic about the way you move in the world — even if you’re not loud about it, people feel your intensity.

The 10th house is about career, reputation, public image, and authority — and Pluto brings transformation, control, and raw power to all of it. You’re not just here to “have a job.” You’re here to own your path, to rise to the top of whatever field you’re in, and to make an impact. Even if it takes time, you’re wired to build something lasting, and you won’t stop until you do.

That said, it’s rarely a straight shot to success. With Pluto here, you might go through some serious ups and downs with your career or public identity. There could be major shifts — like climbing the ladder, crashing hard, and rising from the ashes even stronger. You learn through these experiences how to let go of old versions of yourself and step into something more powerful each time.

You might also experience intense dynamics with authority figures — bosses, parents, institutions — where control and power play a huge role. Maybe you resist being controlled, or maybe you’ve had to wrestle with your own need to be the one in control. Either way, you're here to redefine what power looks like — for yourself and others.

People might project their expectations or fears onto you because you have a commanding energy. Whether you realize it or not, others see you as someone who’s meant for big things. That can be intimidating, but it’s also your edge. Once you stop trying to blend in and start owning that you're a natural leader or influencer, things shift.

You’re here to lead by transforming systems, not just following them. That could mean building a business, changing an industry, or becoming the kind of authority figure you wish you'd had. Legacy matters to you — not in a flashy way, but in a deep, lasting way. You want your work to mean something.

Pluto in the 11th house

Pluto in the 11th house is next-level transformation through your connections with the collective — friendships, communities, social movements, and your long-term vision for the future. This is the placement of someone who’s here to shake up the status quo and change the system from the inside out.

You’re not here to just “fit in.” You’re here to find your soul tribe — people who are deep, real, and ready to evolve with you. Superficial social scenes? Nah, that’s not your vibe. You crave connections that have meaning, purpose, and maybe even a little intensity. In fact, your friendships might go through some heavy shifts over time — people coming and going, betrayals, loyalty tests, or just straight-up energetic mismatches that force you to level up.

And the people you do keep around? They can be powerful allies. You’re someone who can attract influential or deeply transformative individuals into your life — and your presence can do the same for them. You help others grow just by being real and pushing them to look deeper at themselves and the world.

This placement also gives you a serious obsession (in a good way) with your vision for the future. You want to create change — whether it’s through activism, innovation, spiritual work, art, or just breaking old systems that don’t serve people anymore. There’s a revolutionary vibe to you, like you’re lowkey always scanning society for what needs to die so something better can be built in its place.

Sometimes you might feel like an outsider, especially if your ideas are too "much" for the people around you. But that's part of your journey — learning to stand strong in your truth and finding or building communities that get it.

There can also be control themes around groups or social dynamics. Maybe you want to lead or resist being led. Maybe you’re drawn to secret or exclusive groups. Or maybe you've felt used or overlooked in social circles. But the key is learning how to hold power with others, not over them.

Bottom line: you're here to redefine what community and collaboration look like — and your influence can ripple out way further than you think.

Pluto in the 12th house

Pluto in the 12th house is some of the most powerful, mysterious, and spiritually transformative energy you can have in a birth chart. This is deep, behind-the-scenes Pluto — the kind that works in the unconscious, the soul, the hidden realms most people avoid or don’t even realize exist. If you have this placement, you’re not just on a life journey… you’re on a soul mission.

With Pluto here, you’re naturally tuned in to the invisible — dreams, symbols, energy, vibes, emotions that have no words. You might pick up on other people’s moods without trying, or feel things that others can’t explain. It’s not always easy — because you're basically carrying the emotional weight of not just yourself, but often of others or even collective pain.

There’s often a strong pull toward mysticism, spirituality, psychology, or healing. You may have had early life experiences that were deeply emotional, confusing, or that forced you inward — maybe trauma, isolation, or feeling misunderstood. But this inner world you were pushed into? It’s where your power lives. You're here to transform through surrender, trust, and the kind of healing that doesn’t happen on the surface.

This placement can sometimes make you feel like there’s something hidden within you — like a power you’re not fully sure how to access. But the more you explore your subconscious, your dreams, or your spiritual path, the more that power starts to reveal itself.

There can be periods of emotional intensity, shadow work, or even a sense of self-sabotage that you have to confront. You might find that things you’ve repressed or avoided emotionally come up in powerful waves — but facing them head-on is where your transformation happens.

You may also have a natural gift for healing, especially through spiritual or energetic means. You could be a powerful guide for others — even if it's quiet, behind-the-scenes, or unspoken. People might come to you without knowing why, drawn to your energy, your calm depth, your ability to hold space for things most people can’t.

Pluto in the 12th is like a cosmic detox — you're here to release what isn't yours, to rise through the shadows, and to awaken others by doing your own inner work.

[dahliakbs]

Retired Villain

(⁠ ๑Batfam X Reader - Dick Grayson, Damian Wayne and Tim Drakeﾉ⁠♡ ⁠)

Masterlist

╠You'd put your reckless lifestyle behind in favor of living a boring civilian life, knowing that you wouldn't get anywhere in life if you kept getting beaten up and sent to jail over and over like it was the only thing life had to offer.

You thought that putting your past behind you and creating yourself a fresh start would finally put the bats off your trail...

But sadly for you, it had only taken your cities vigilantes about two weeks to find out where you lived.

Even though they'd found out where you lived and how you'd decided to turn your life around they didn't believe it.

And instead of taking the information at face value they'd decided to check up on you in person.

And that they did.

Now you would've thought that they'd leave you alone after just the first few times but no, they'd started popping up everywhere. Using the excuse of your old atrocities to monitor you almost every waking moment of the day.

And when I say every I mean every.

Your at the supermarket, buying food like everyone else and Nightwing just randomly shows up out of nowhere. Bugging you and using the excuse of monitoring you to justify his presence.

"I know times are dire but stealing milk from the supermart?" you could see his outline in your peripheral, propping himself up against the fridge next to you.

He's shaking his head playfully before moving to take your cart away from you. You knew he was aware that you weren't gonna steal anything but apparently teasing you was his new favorite hobby.

"For the last time, I'm not stealing anything from this store" you huffed before dumping the carton of milk into the cart he'd taken from you.

"This store, so how about the next one?"

You could already feel the gray hairs sprouting, it was like he was sucking all the energy out of you and you could do nothing about it.

Well, at least he helped you with the shopping right?

While your on your way making your way to work one of the Robins will just mysteriously appear next to you, specifically the youngest one. Always giving off a clear air of distaste towards your entire being but still accompanying you on your way to work.

"Don't you have school kid?" you ask, it was like nine in the morning and he was casually walking next to you as if he didn't have somewhere to be right now.

"I don't need to go to school, besides I'm stuck monitoring criminals like you" he stated and you could already feel him drilling holes into the side of your head.

This kid really has no chill...

"Well if it makes you feel any better I also don't like having people watch me 24/7" you could feel your shoulders sag at the thought of having to put up with the bat and his tiny army of children.

Even when you were simply relaxing in your humble abode they'd still had the audacity come ruin your little alone time.

You were just relaxing in your pyjamas, munching on some popcorn and enjoying the fact that for once you were finally all by yourself when suddenly a figure hauls themselves over the edge of your window sill and crashes onto the floor of your apartment.

Of course your quick to push yourself off your couch and grab a weapon from the hidden compartment in your chair only to realize that your intruder was just another one of batman's minions.

"Red, you can't be serious" you immediately drop you weapon and walk over to his crumpled form.

He looked like he just went through hell, which was pretty sad since you knew he was just a kid on the inside but batman's sidekicks always seemed a little on the younger side.

"Are you crashing for the night?" He'd already done this before, always denying the fact that he was staying the night but always ends up staying anyway.

"No, I'm not" he muttered to himself, crumpling even more into himself but flinching when one of his wounds comes into contact with his detached gear.

"Right, your monitoring me" you played along, allowing him to believe that he was leaving anytime soon but you could already see his body relaxing it self.

"By the way, your crashing on the couch Tonight" you'd at least allow him to stay somewhere in your house, knowing that the supposed 'Batcave' that they always spoke about was somewhere on the other side of Gotham.

He should be lucky that he's your favorite, because ain't no way were you allowing any of the other bats anywhere near your house. Let alone inside of it.╣

[ginnsbaker]

All Of Your Pieces (18 - The Civil War)

Chapter Summary: “She shouldn’t feel like she’s a threat," you said. Natasha tilted her head slightly, considering you. “She doesn’t just feel it, Y/N. She’s been told it. Over and over. The Accords, Vision, everything. It’s going to take more than two weeks to undo all that.”

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Female Reader Chapter word count: 5k+ | Chapter Tags: Slight angst, hurt/comfort

A/N: Hell yeah I'm finally done with midterm week! So, as promised, here's an update for Sunday that I was supposed to post last Wednesday. Thank you all for waiting! // More author's notes here. GIF credits to the owner. Let me know is this is yours!

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

The debate over the Sokovia Accords had always seemed like a bureaucratic exercise to you—a lot of grandstanding and red tape, destined to drag on without anything concrete coming of it. But when it ended in literal casualties, moments after the UN summit in Vienna, you realized how naive that assumption had been.

The explosion dominated every news channel, every forum, for weeks. Footage of the carnage played on a relentless loop, like a ruthless reminder that refused to let the world move on. It stoked their anger and fear of the superpowered intensifying—further solidifying the need for a regulation of some sorts. 

And then there was Steve—Captain America—standing between the law and a man the world had already convicted in its collective mind. Protecting a criminal—or so it seemed at first glance. But if you squinted, if you dug beneath the hysteria, you could see the loopholes in the story.

You were taught to never take things at face value. To investigate, to question, to confirm. The video evidence of James Barnes near the scene of the bombing was damning, but not airtight. The timing was too perfect and the evidence too clean—as if it was designed to be found. And then there was the sheer improbability—someone like Barnes being sloppy enough to leave a clue, to incriminate himself by carrying out such large-scale destruction carelessly.

If it really was him, you figured, no one would know. The world wouldn’t have a name to blame or a face to crucify. 

Steve believed it too. He didn’t just think Barnes was innocent—he knew it. Or at least he believed in him enough to stake his own reputation on it. 

The manhunt for Barnes split the Avengers right down the middle. Tony and Natasha were working with the UN and the German authorities, pushing for Barnes’ immediate capture, while Steve enlisted Sam’s help to find him first and uncover the truth once and for all.

Which left you stuck at the compound with Wanda and Vision—because, of course, that’s just how your luck worked.

—

You’d been keeping to yourself, burying your head in books and doing whatever busywork you could find to keep from dwelling on it all. It wasn’t a peaceful kind of quiet, though—not even close. It was rife with tension, and you hated that your main orders were to stay put. 

You’d seen Vision and Wanda together more lately. They were spending time in the kitchen, of all places. Vision seemed to have developed a fascination with cooking, and Wanda, for reasons you didn’t entirely understand, had decided to humor him. 

That’s how you ended up at the world’s most uncomfortable dinner.

The table stretched long, built to fit the entire team, and you settled a few spots away from them. Vision had made something intricate, his approach to food as overly analytical as you’d expect. Wanda had contributed in small ways—chopping vegetables, stirring sauces—but it was clear who had taken the lead.

You sat across from them, awkwardly poking at the meal on your plate. It was good, technically. Perfectly seasoned, perfectly cooked. But the scene around the table made it hard to enjoy. Vision sat still, weirdly choosing this time not to participate in this human activity. He looked perfectly content watching his two eaters, wanting to see if he had earned their approval. Wanda wasn’t eating much. She was pushing her food around, her eyes darting toward him, then to you, then back to her plate.

“Is it to your liking?” Vision asked. 

“It’s fine,” you said, knowing full well it was much better than that but not feeling generous enough to say so.

“Wanda assisted with the preparation,” he added, almost as if he thought that might tip the scales.

You glanced at her. She gave a small, half-hearted smile and shrugged. “Just chopping and stuff,” she said.

After that, the conversation died again.

It had felt like a good time to disassociate, and you let your mind drift off somewhere else. More specifically, to the growing rift between Tony and Steve. The misunderstandings were no longer petty disagreements but fundamental divides. If push came to shove, you still hadn’t decided where you stood.

You used to joke about Tony and Steve acting like divorced husbands, bickering over every little thing. Now, the irony wasn’t so funny. They were barreling toward something that resembled a real divorce, and you could almost see them dividing the team like children—figuring out who got custody of whom.

But you? You were always the lone wolf. It seemed more likely you’d walk away from them both, let them fight their battles while you disappeared into the shadows. You’d done it before, and the thought of doing it again didn’t terrify you. And maybe that was the problem.

A sharp noise from outside yanked you out of your thoughts. The sound wasn’t loud, but it was enough to put everyone on edge. Vision’s head cocked slightly, as if concentrating to learn more about what they all just heard.

“Stay here,” he ordered calmly.

“Wait—” you started, but before you or Wanda could get another word out, he disappeared, phasing cleanly through the nearest wall and leaving you both sitting in uneasy silence.

For a moment, neither of you moved. You glanced at Wanda, her fork frozen midair, her eyes trained on the spot where Vision had disappeared. Finally, you exhaled and nudged your plate aside. “This is the best meal I’ve had in a long time,” you murmured.

Wanda’s head snapped up. Then, to your surprise, a laugh slipped out of her—short, almost involuntary, like it had been startled into existence. “I could tell,” she said, her lips curving into something that might’ve been a smile.

It was angelic and utterly contagious. You smiled back, soft and unplanned, like your body decided for you. It’s the most interaction you’d had with her for a while after bringing her to the orphanage weeks ago. 

God, you’d missed her. 

Out of the corner of your eye, something shifted. Without thinking, you were on your feet, moving to Wanda’s side, positioning yourself as a human shield. It was a ridiculous gesture—pathetic, even—considering what she could do versus what you could offer. But instinct doesn’t care about logic. The drive to protect her overrode everything else, propelling you forward before your brain could catch up.

Clint Barton strolled toward you, bow slung over his shoulder, every inch of him looking like he was prepped for a mission. And judging by the timing, it didn’t take a genius to figure out—you, Wanda, and Vision were the mission.

“Clint?” you uttered in disbelief. “What are you doing here?”

“Disappointing my kids,” he replied dryly, stepping fully into view with that familiar half-grin you hadn’t seen in ages. “Cap needs our help. Come on.”

You let out a short laugh, shaking your head. “Well, I’m not disappointed.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Clint muttered, his eyes scanning the room, barely giving you a glance. “We need to move. Both of you. Now.”

You were on your feet before he could say anything else, your hand closing around Wanda’s wrist without a second thought. It wasn’t until you felt her skin warm under your grip that you realized what you were doing. You let go just as quickly, glancing back at her with a quiet apology in your eyes.

But Wanda wasn’t paying attention to you. She was giving Clint a hard look, her feet planted firmly on the ground.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Wanda said, surprising you both.

“Wanda, you can’t stay here,” Clint said. “After Lagos—”

“I’ve caused enough problems,” she whispered. “Maybe it’s better if I stay out of sight. Out of everyone’s way.”

“You gotta help me, Wanda. Look, you wanna mope, you can go to high school. You wanna make amends, you get off your ass. Y/N, help me out here.”

You glanced at Wanda, trying to decipher what she’s thinking but you came up empty-handed. You turned back to Clint. “You let her decide, Clint. You don’t drag her onto your side—or anyone’s. She chooses.”

Clint chuckled, eyeing you like he already expected your answer before you did. “And what about you? Which side are you on?” he asked.

You opened your mouth to answer, but hesitated, not because you didn’t know the answer—you did. You just weren’t ready to say it out loud.

Because the truth was simple: whichever side Wanda chose, that’s where you’d be.

You’d told yourself you could walk away from this. From the Avengers, from the divide, from the mess of it all. And maybe you could. Maybe you would have.

But Wanda—

You wanted to look after her. 

You were saved from answering altogether when Vision reappeared, phased through the far wall.

“Aw, hell,” Clint muttered, his hand twitching toward his bow.

“Clint Barton,” Vision said. “You are not authorized to be here. Step away from Wanda.”

“Yeah, see, the thing is,” he said, casually shifting his stance as he engaged an arrow, “I don’t really care about authorization.”

Clint didn’t wait for Vision’s retort. He released his arrows and triggered the traps he’d set—an electrified net sprung from the ceiling, enveloping Vision in crackling energy. For a split second, you thought it might actually work.

It didn’t.

Vision freed himself out of the net like it was tissue paper, the electricity harmlessly dissipating around him. 

“Yeah, well, worth a shot,” Clint muttered, already nocking an arrow. He let it fly, but Vision caught it midair with a speed that was almost unfair. 

Clint moved fast, dodging Vision’s strikes with a skill that came from years of experience. He didn’t try to overpower him—he wasn’t stupid—but he kept Vision moving, trying to distract him, to buy time. 

Vision held back, almost smug—you'd think he was waiting for Clint to tire himself out, running circles that led nowhere.

“Y/N, a little help?” Clint called, ducking under a swipe from Vision that could’ve caved his skull. Before you could even think to move, Vision had Clint in a chokehold, his vibranium arm coiling around Clint’s throat. Clint's attempts to break free looked almost pathetic, his fists thumping uselessly against Vision's arm.

You froze for a split second, looking at Wanda. Was this what she wanted? Her face gave you nothing, and in that moment of indecision, Clint’s choking gasps snapped you into action.

You rushed forward, grabbing onto Vision’s arm and hauling yourself up, trying to throw him off balance. He barely budged. Desperation took over as you reached behind your back, pulling a small blade from your pocket.

Vision caught the motion instantly. His free arm shot out, grabbing your wrist and twisting it sharply. Pain shot through your arm as the knife clattered to the floor.

You gritted your teeth, trying to fight through the pain. “Let him go, Vision!”

Clint’s face was red now, his struggles weakening. You kicked at Vision’s side, but it was like hitting a brick wall.

“Vision, that’s enough!”

Vision's grip loosened for just a moment, enough for you to catch your breath, before it cinched tighter. You bit back a whimper, already feeling the marks that would bloom across your skin.

"I said, that’s enough," Wanda commanded as red energy crackled menacingly at her fingertips. 

Vision moved to finish the job and the energy surged from Wanda’s hands, slamming into Vision and lifting him clean off the ground. The moment his hold broke, you and Clint crumpled like discarded ragdolls. 

“If you do this, they will never stop being afraid of you,” Vision said. You opened your mouth to argue, to tell Vision he was wrong, but Wanda spoke first.

“I can’t control their fear,” Wanda murmured. Her shoulders sagged as she sighed wearily, looking like she already regretted what she was about to do, knowing it would hurt Vision. “Only my own.”

The ground opened up like a wound, swallowing Vision whole. Wanda’s power didn’t just push him down—it buried him. The compound’s reinforced flooring crumbled like dry leaves, and the sound of his descent—steel on steel, concrete splitting apart—made your stomach churn.

You sat up, head pounding, ribs screaming. Clint was coughing beside you, dragging himself upright with a hand braced against the wall. Neither of you spoke. What could you say?

Wanda stood over the crater she’d made, her hands slack at her sides, red sparks still licking at her fingertips. Her face was blank, but you knew her well enough by now to see through it. Her breathing was too shallow, her shoulders too stiff. She wasn’t fine at all. 

It was a little jarring to think that just a few hours ago, they were cooking together in the kitchen.

“Wanda,” you started, still trying to catch your breath. “Is he—”

“He’ll survive,” she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

Clint gave a weak chuckle, thoroughly impressed and a little horrified. “Remind me never to get on your bad side.”

—

Things happened dizzyingly fast after that. 

You’d only meant to get Wanda to Clint, to make sure she was safe, but everything spiraled at the airport. You hadn’t thought past that, hadn’t considered the bigger picture or the consequences of leaving the compound with her.

The fight was brutal—friends turning on friends—and you barely kept up, trying to shield Wanda when you could. You’d been hurt, subdued like a criminal, strapped into restraints that bit into your skin. But none of it mattered. Your entire focus was on Wanda—if she was okay, if she was hurt, if she blamed you for any of it.

When they threw you in The Raft, the humiliation of it barely registered. All you could see was Wanda, restrained in that awful straitjacket, her face pale and blank, her hands trembling. It must have been harder on her than anyone else—treated like a criminal with the weight of Lagos hanging over her head. In that moment, you made your choice—Steve had your loyalty now, no matter what came next. But even that didn’t compare to how fiercely you had Wanda’s back. That was something else entirely.

Now, two weeks later, Valencia felt like limbo. A place to breathe—

—with a target on your backs, well, not really.

—

Valencia might’ve been halfway around the globe, but you treated it like hostile territory all the same. Your face—along with the rest of those who backed Steve in his fierce objection to the Sokovia Accords—had hit every newsfeed, and you couldn’t afford to relax here or anywhere else, for that matter. You dressed down, stuck to side streets, and kept your head low. It was Spain, but it might as well have been home—just another place where you were never really safe.

“Have you heard from Clint?”

Natasha nodded before turning the page of the newspaper she’d been reading since this morning. “Yeah. He’s working out a deal with the government.”

You frowned. “What kind of deal?”

“Something about a plea bargain,” she said. “House arrest, probably. It’s the only way he gets to be with his family.”

Clint had fought for all of you, risked everything to stand with Steve, to break Wanda out. It hadn’t fully sunk in just how much he’d sacrificed until now—how much he put on the line for what he believed in.

“That’s messed up,” you muttered, mindlessly stirring the honey you’ve put in your tea a few minutes ago. You’d yet to take a sip.  “If Clint’s willing to sacrifice being with his family, how can Tony not see what we’re standing for?”

Natasha’s lips pressed into a thin line. “Tony sees it. He just sees something else too.”

“Like what?”

Natasha didn’t respond right away. She just looked at you, her gaze steady, like she was weighing her next words. “You weren’t there.”

For a moment, you were confused. “Where?”

“In the Battle of New York. When the sky opened up, and Earth faced the greatest threat it had ever seen—and wasn’t ready for.”

Natasha sighed and took her sunglasses off—a risky move as the cafe was in the middle of a crowded street—but she needed you to more than just hear the words out of her mouth, you needed to see how this wasn’t some trivial disagreement between two people who cared about the same thing. “Tony was at the front lines, throwing everything he had into the fight. There were so many casualties. We couldn’t save everyone, no matter how hard we tried. And the guilt of that... it doesn’t wash off, no matter how many victories come after.”

You frowned, gripping your mug a little tighter. “So his solution is what? Autocracy?”

Natasha laughed and put her glasses back on. “I wasn’t aware you knew what autocracy was,” she teased. “Though, if you really did, you’d know what Tony wants is far from it. This is an entirely different situation.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the faint smirk tugging at your own lips. “If you understand Tony so well, why are you here with us?”

“I’m not here because I switched sides,” she said simply. “I’m here because you need me more than Tony does.”

And she was right. You did. It was bad enough that Clint wasn’t here. You hadn’t realized how much they’d become your safety net until you were on your way and it hit you—you were on your own now. No longer celebrated as a hero but a renowned fugitive. Natasha’s grounding presence was the only thing keeping your nerves from unraveling completely.

“Are you going to drink that?” Natasha asked after a while.

You glanced down at your tea, still stirring the spoon aimlessly. It was cold by now. You shrugged. She waved to the waiter and asked for the bill.

“I tried to convince Wanda to go out today,” Natasha said casually, like she wasn’t sure how you’d take it. “Thought a walk might do her some good.”

You looked up from your tea, surprised. “And?”

“She passed.”

You sighed loudly. “It’s been two weeks.”

“It’s not enough time for some people.”

You didn’t say anything right away, not wanting to push or show how much that affected you. Two weeks felt like forever when you were going over everything in your head when you first got out of the country. For Wanda, it must’ve felt like a lifetime—and not in the way that healed anything.

“Did she say why?” you asked quietly. 

Natasha’s lips twitched, like she wasn’t sure whether to smile or sigh. “She didn’t have to. She thinks stepping outside is dangerous. For her, for everyone. And maybe she’s not wrong.”

“She shouldn’t feel like she’s a threat,” you said.

Natasha tilted her head slightly, considering you. “She doesn’t just feel it, Y/N. She’s been told it. Over and over. The Accords, Vision, everything. It’s going to take more than two weeks to undo all that.”

—

The hotel you’d been staying at for the past three nights was tucked away from the town center, far enough that the food you’d picked up for Wanda had gone cold by the time you got back. The isolation had its perks, though. This part of town had a quiet charm, with streets adorned in LED lights strung like Christmas was a permanent state of mind here.

The team had split up to stay under the radar. Steve accompanied Bucky to Wakanda, bartering a deal with T’Challa. Sam was stationed in a modest inn on the opposite side of the city, while you, Natasha, and Wanda ended up here, in a small, charming hotel surrounded by cobblestone streets and 15th-century architecture. With no mission except to stay hidden, it should’ve been the perfect chance to soak in the city like a tourist, to appreciate the timeless beauty around you.

But instead, you found yourself standing outside Wanda’s hotel room, the takeout bag dangling from your hand. You took a shaky breath, then another, willing your heartbeat to slow. It wasn’t working. Your fingers fidgeted with the strap of the bag, the cheap paper threatening to give out at any second.

Why were you so nervous? It wasn’t like this was the first time you’d seen Wanda since… everything. But things were different now. She felt different, like she was retreating into herself more and more each day.

Another deep breath. You adjusted your grip on the bag, smoothed down the front of your jacket, and gave yourself a silent pep talk. She needed you, just like you needed Natasha. Like you needed Clint.

Finally, you raised your hand, but before your knuckles met the wood, the door creaked open.

Wanda stood there, barefoot, her frame almost swallowed by an oversized shirt that hung loosely off one shoulder. It was frayed at the hem, the fabric softened by too many washes. Her pajama pants—faded plaid—looked like they’d seen better days, one cuff slightly torn where it dragged against the ground. She looked as worn as her clothes, her hair in a messy bun with stray strands framing her face.

For a moment, she just blinked at you.

“You knew it was me?” you asked, your voice coming out thinner than you'd intended. 

“I had a feeling,” Wanda said with a small, knowing smile. “You breathe a little too loud.”

An embarrassed chuckle escaped you, awkward and unsteady, and you suddenly remembered the takeout bag clutched in your hand. Her gaze followed yours, and she tilted her head slightly. 

“What’s that?”

“Oh, right,” you said, your face heating up as you held it up like a peace offering. “It’s for you. Some kind of beef stew—I, uh, forgot the actual name. It’s probably cold now, though. You should—”

Before you could ramble any further, Wanda reached out and took the bag from your hands. Her fingers brushed yours briefly, and the simple touch sent you into a headspin. “Thank you,” she murmured, looking into the bag.

You swallowed hard and gave a quick nod. “You’re welcome, Maximoff.” It felt like the right moment to leave, like you’d done your part, but your feet refused to move. You stood there like a fool, heart hammering, until Wanda—thankfully—broke the silence.

“Would you like to come in, Y/N?” she asked, her voice faltering slightly, as if she wasn’t entirely sure of herself either.

Too nervous to speak, you merely nodded.

—

The room was a bit of a mess—not filthy, but definitely in disarray. Books and papers were scattered across the coffee table, a pair of shoes lay haphazardly near the door, and a jacket was draped over the back of a chair. Wanda must have noticed your gaze drifting across the space because she quickly began tidying up. She grabbed a bundle of clothes from various corners—sweatshirts, a scarf, what looked like a pair of mismatched socks—and folded them into a neat pile. With an almost embarrassed smile, she placed them on the small sofa tucked beneath the room’s single window.

“Sorry,” Wanda murmured, “I wasn’t exactly expecting company.”

“It’s fine,” you said quickly, though your eyes darted back to the room despite yourself. There was something endearing about the lived-in clutter, a reminder that Wanda, for all her power and grace, for all that had happened in recent weeks—was still human in moments like these.

She gestured awkwardly toward the sofa. “You can sit, if you want. Sorry again for the mess.”

“You really don’t have to apologize. My place is worse,” you said. It wasn’t.

Wanda offered you a half-smile as she moved to the kitchenette, pulling open a drawer to grab some utensils. “I find that hard to believe,” she teased lightly.

Busted. Your room at the compound had been practically bare. Your hotel room now was even emptier. You missed your own apartment, but could only assume it had already been raided by the feds.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” you shot back, and she laughed softly, the sound settling something nervous and fluttering in your chest.

Wanda set the bowl on the counter and turned on the stove. You watched as she poured the stew into a small saucepan and stirred it absently. 

“You should eat some too,” she said over her shoulder. “It’ll taste better warm.”

“I already had dinner, actually.”

Wanda glanced back at you, her brow lifting in question. “With Nat?”

You nodded, feeling oddly exposed under her gaze. “Yeah.”

Her lips quirked, but the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. “How’s she doing?”

It wasn’t the kind of question that invited much of an answer—it felt more like something to say, just to fill the space. You gave a half-shrug, unsure what else to do with it. “She’s fine.”

Wanda didn’t push for more. She settled onto the sofa beside you, tucking her legs beneath her and taking a small bite of the stew.

You wanted to ask how she was. How she was holding up after everything. But you couldn’t get any word out. You didn’t know how to ask without making it sound like pity, and you didn’t want to do that to her. Still, the question burned at the edge of your thoughts.

It had to be hard, being in the middle of all this again, being wanted—hunted—just like she was when she aligned with Hydra. You couldn’t stop thinking about how Vision was on the other side now, the person who should’ve stood with her through it all, standing with the people determined to stop her. That kind of fracture would break anyone.

You glanced at her out of the corner of your eye. She was focused on her food, but the energy radiating off her couldn’t talk you out of asking her if she was okay.

“Wanda?” you started, “Are you—”

“I’m okay,” she said, cutting you off gently, as though she knew what you were going to ask. For a moment you considered if she was reading your mind at the moment. 

She set the bowl down and offered you a faint smile. “Really.”

You nodded, though you didn’t really believe her. The room fell quiet again, and you looked away, legs starting to bounce a little as you thought of what to say next. 

“Has Steve come up with the next plan yet?” Wanda asked.

Her question confused you for a moment, making you feel like you’ve missed something. “Plan? Plan for what?”

She shrugged, chewing her food thoughtfully. “To come back. To clear our names. To return to…” She trailed off. To return to our normal lives.

Oh. The thought hadn’t even crossed your mind. Being an Avenger never felt anything close to normal, so you weren’t sure you ever really knew what normal was.

You wanted to assure her that Steve’s working on it, but you couldn’t lie to her either. From what you heard from Nat, Steve was preoccupied with helping Bucky’s asylum in Wakanda. And that could take a while. “I don’t think that’s possible anytime soon.”

“Why not?”

“Steve and Tony…” You exhaled slowly, trying to find the right way to explain. “Their misunderstanding—it’s serious this time. It’s not something that’s going to blow over.”

“Right,” Wanda said curtly, then fell silent, turning her attention back to her food.

Without thinking, you blurted, “Do you miss Vision?”

Her head jerked up, her eyes wide like she hadn’t been expecting you to mention Vision at any point in this conversation.

“I…” Wanda deliberated. “I do.”

You forced your jealousy down your dry throat. Of course she did. What were you thinking, even asking? Vision was her lover. They were clearly going through something, and here you were, dredging it up. You should’ve left right after giving her the food—that would’ve been the perfect time to go.

“I regret what I did to him,” Wanda said suddenly, breaking through your thoughts. “Burying him w-with…with my powers.” Her hand tightened around the spoon, the metal scraping against the edge of the bowl. “I didn’t think—I just reacted. And it wasn’t just him. I hurt the others too. At the airport.”

Your breath hitched. This wasn’t what you expected. “Wanda—”

She shook her head quickly, cutting you off. “I didn’t mean to lose control. I thought I was doing the right thing. Fighting for the right side. But after everything… I don’t know if there is a right side anymore.”

Her honesty floored you. You’d spent so much time blaming Tony for losing control, for going after Bucky, that you never stopped to turn the lens on yourself. You’d had your careless moments, caused your share of injuries to civilians on missions. You were just as responsible for how things unraveled—just like Steve, Tony, and the rest of the team.

“I want to believe we’re all still on the same side,” you muttered, resting your elbows on your knees as you searched for the right words. “That we’re still fighting for the same things—for justice, to protect people, to make things better. We’ve just… messed up how we’re going about it. But that doesn’t mean it’s over. We just need to figure out how to sort it all out.”

You swallowed hard, gathering the courage to speak. “I’m sure Vision forgives you for what happened. He… he loves you. And you two? You’re going to be okay.”

Her head snapped up at that. “What do you mean, ‘we’re going to be okay?’”

You winced, awkwardly scratching the back of your neck as you tried to clarify. “I just mean, yeah, sure, it might be a deal breaker for some people—getting buried alive and all—but Vision… he’s not like that. I don’t think he’d break up with you for—”

“We already broke up.”

You froze, staring at her. “What?” was all you managed to say.

Wanda sighed, setting the bowl on the coffee table with a soft clink. “We broke up. Before Clint came to get me from the compound.”

“Why?” you found yourself asking. You thought you'd feel happy, or at least relieved, but the truth left a bad taste in your mouth. Two people you cared about—yes, you’d finally admitted to yourself that you cared more than you wanted to—had ended their relationship, and somehow, that didn’t sit right with you. “I thought… I thought you two…”

“It wasn’t working,” Wanda explained. “We wanted it to, but things between us were always… complicated. And after the Accords, after everything that happened in Lagos…” She trailed off, shaking her head. “It became clear that we were too different. He wanted peace. I wanted… freedom. And I guess we couldn’t find a way to have both.”

Wanting different things has a way of pulling two people off the same path. You wanted freedom too—but until you stopped chasing it, how could you want anything else? How could you want what Wanda wanted? But then, you’ve never aligned your interests with someone just to stay by their side, so why start now?

“I’m sorry,” you said finally, the words feeling small but all you had to give.

She gave you a small, tired smile. “Don’t be. It was mutual, even if it still hurts.”

You wanted to say something—to comfort her, to remind her she wasn’t alone—but it didn’t feel like the right time. Maybe this was a moment to sit with it, to let everything settle. So instead, you reached out, your hand finding hers, giving it a gentle squeeze. A quiet way of saying, I’m here.

It was the first time in weeks you’d touched her.

Wanda looked down at your hand, then back at you. “Thank you,” she whispered.

Your heart slowed, like it wanted to stretch this moment out, to hold onto the feeling of her hand beneath yours forever.

You gave her a small nod. “Always.”

[the-thing-withfeathers]

exceeded caution part 2

first time for everything

series masterlist | next part

a/n: heyy y’all!! so this is part 2 of exceeded caution. a lot of it follows the actual movie because i needed set-up for ghostface. there’s still a lot of interaction between the reader + sam & tara but some of it is from the first 30 minutes of scream vi essentially.

warnings: violence (gun usage, knife usage), cursing. he/him pronouns for ghostface. 5.8k words.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

a few days ago, sam was nowhere near the forefront of your mind. you had stayed with the group as they navigated their way through accepting that ghostface might be back.

you hadn't spoken to tara much, you felt like you wouldn't be any help to her. she didn't need her ex-girlfriend that she only dated out of convenience around her constantly.

instead, the other carpenter sister started to find solace in your presence.

you found yourself over quite a bit, you noticed that they valued strength in numbers. you even all set a rotation between the group for who would cook that week.

during your week to cook, sam insisted on joining you when grocery shopping. as you promised her that she wouldn't be alone, she mentally promised you the same thing.

"it's just a simple beef stroganoff recipe, sam. you really don't have to come." you smiled sheepishly as you pulled up outside her apartment, she was hopping into your passenger seat.

"ghostface won't let a grocery store stop him from taking lives." sam was firm in her words, you sighed in defeat and drove off towards the shops that were only a couple minutes away from her place. you wanted her to feel safe still.

she pushed the cart while you took ingredients off the shelves, mumbling to yourself as you chucked them in the cart.

"tara used to say your food was amazing. where did you learn to cook?" she asked you, you looked away from your list to smile at her.

"my mom, she's amazing at cooking. she gave up her career to support my dad and become a fulltime housewife." you explained. "i used to help her cook all the time."

"that's pretty cool. i find myself never having the time for new foods. i should probably get on that."

"i can teach you some. or make some for you, i like cooking for people." you shrugged, taking another ingredient off the shelves.

sam would normally decline if you were anyone else, but she felt the urge to accept.

"sure. that would be nice." she nodded at you.

sam had enjoyed you being around more often and getting to know you outside of tara. she even found herself calling you a friend.

or rather, she tried to keep it at friend. she was trying to hide the fact that she felt a pull to you, she didn't know how to explain it. although, one thing was sure, there was an element of guilt to it.

she wasn’t the only one feeling guilty. you felt almost dirty with how much you thought of sam. because of the frequency of your contact, you found yourself wanting to see her more.

was this against some form of girl code that you shouldn’t want to hang out with your ex’s sister?

“um… how are you?” she could see that you were nervous to ask her that. “i know you probably get asked that all the time but i never ask… and i want to know.”

“that’s fine. i figured you would get curious. you always seem to be.” sam commented.

“is curiosity bad?” you teased a little, noting her phrasing.

“no! not at all.” she perked up, shaking her head.

“don’t worry sam, i’m joking.” you realised that the carpenter sisters weren’t used to bantering with someone they weren’t extremely close to— or someone they didn’t love.

“right.” she bit her lip. “but no? it’s not bad at all.” she chuckled. “but i’m… not okay?”

you nodded, respecting her answer and silently thanking her for being honest.

“i hoped that we would escape this when we moved. and i’ve been doing everything to protect tara but it didn’t end for sidney prescott— so i assume that it won’t end for us.” she scratched her brow, the stress getting to her. “i’m sorry you got involved.”

“it’s okay, sam. i knew what i was getting into when i dated tara.” you nodded. “if it happened again, i already knew i’d stick around.”

“that’s admirable.”

you felt your heart clench a little when she said that. nobody had ever told you that your desire to stick around was admirable. you always got “clingy” or “overbearing.” that was the first time you’d ever gotten a compliment on it.

“oh! um… thank you.” you stuttered out, a blush flooding your cheeks. you knew that sam meant it too, she wasn’t just saying it to make you feel better. she was genuinely saying it.

“it’s true.” it was.

you tried to push your flustered down into the depths of your mind as you struggled to reach the top shelf with the last of your ingredients. you were definitely taller than tara— everyone was. but not tall enough to face this eight layered shelf.

sam was.

sam was taller. and she made that perfectly clear when she basically pressed up behind you to grab this damn dijon mustard for you.

oh no… oh no… you had to stop those thoughts. you had turned around too quickly, basically coming chest to chest with the girl. she didn’t seem to mind— and you refused to mind.

you had never been this close to her before. your eyes trailed over all her features, taking them in. she looked just like tara… maybe that’s whats got your heart beating at the speed of light.

but she wasn’t tara. no, she was sam. and you found that to be what sealed the deal for you.

you found her pretty.

you remained silent as you finished off the last of the ingredient collection. you walked over to the self check-out, scanning the items as the blush continued to make its presence known as sam hovered.

you shuffled some things around in your pocket to try and find your card but before you knew it, sam was paying for your groceries.

“what—“ you tried to protest but the transaction had gone through already.

sam didn’t know what overcame her.

it was her way of taking care of you.

it was even her way of apologising to you.

"sam, you didn't have to do that." you shook your head at her.

"my treat, i didn't get to cook for everyone so this is my way of contributing." she shook you off. you knew that was a lie because mindy sent you a photo of meals you missed, one being sam's.

there was no undoing it now. you sighed and reached for the bags, but sam was one step ahead of you, grabbing them and walking out of the store.

you wished you could wash the blush off with soap.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

when you arrived for dinner with your groceries. everyone was already at the carpenter’s apartment. they were spread out across the entire floor, conversing with each other.

you got to cooking almost immediately, knowing that everyone had potentially been there for a while. sam left your side to talk to quinn.

you kept feeling eyes on you.

the shorter carpenter sister was talking to mindy when she felt her attention turn away from her and onto you. she watched you cook, she actually always loved your cooking.

she loved when you would make a dinner catered just to her. she actually missed how lively the kitchen used to be when you were in it. you were even dancing around now, your headphones tucked over your ear.

she smiled a little at how you shook your waist to the music. everyone knew not to bother you so you could get it done quicker.

but tara wanted to bother you. she wanted to approach you and say something, anything to break the silence.

you were friends before everything went down. she thought that maybe she could at least salvage that, that would be her way to redemption.

mindy kept talking and talking before cutting herself off suddenly, realising that tara was no longer paying attention.

“tara, don’t.” mindy said, disappointment clear in her tone. “this is something you need to give time to.”

“there’s been a lot of time.” tara muttered, glaring at mindy.

“you can’t just break her heart and expect her to let you back in so quickly.” mindy held her shoulder back.

“i know it won’t be quick, but i have to try.” tara said through her teeth, pulling her shoulder out of mindy’s grasp and starting to make her way towards you.

tara stopped on her heels when she saw her sister already take your attention. she thought that she’d better not interrupt you.

“whatcha listening to?” sam asked you, her arms crossed over her chest.

you pulled your headphones back a little.

“sloppy jane.” you said.

“sloppy jane? what kind of name is that?!” sam laughed.

“she’s cool! i promise!” you raised your hands up in defense. you took your headphones off your head, you gently placed them on sam. your hands nicking strands of her long hair before you pulled them away.

she held eye contact with her as her head bobbed to the music, you matched the bobbing, knowing which part of the song she was on.

a smile formed on her face while you two were in sync. your eyes started to crinkle up with a smile as your hair started getting in your face when you headbanged. she joined you until the kitchen was filled with laughter.

“okay… okay. i see it now. she has a good sound.” sam agreed with you, placing the headphones back on you but leaving an ear open.

“thank you.” you chuckled, moving the beef strips into the bowl you intended to serve it in.

“this smells soooo good.” sam practically moaned out, you laughed at the noise she made.

“well, you’re gonna have to wait like everyone else!” you teased.

she groaned and rolled her eyes. you liked seeing her loosen up a bit more, you were grateful she was getting more comfortable around you.

as you two laughed, tara stared on.

she remembered when she was in sam’s place. she even felt herself grow jealous at her sister. why did she ever think that what she was doing to you was okay? your heart was gold and tara thought she had turned it dark— she realised your golden heart’s integrity never faltered. you were still just as good.

she was cruel and she broke your heart. she didn’t think she would regret it— until she suddenly felt all that guilt wash over her. was she regretting it?

you enlisted sam to help you bring all your dishes to the table.

“beef stroganoff, pasta, and rice. choose your carb to go with it and enjoy!” you presented your meal to the group.

everyone admired your work and sat down at the table. you ended up sitting beside mindy who talked your ear off about some pottery class that she and anika took.

you glanced over at sam first, her eyes meeting yours during her conversation with ethan. you two exchanged heartfelt smiles, you had a good day because of each other.

then you looked at tara, who was already looking at you. her first serving was practically gone. you knew that she loved one thing about you, and it was your cooking. she held a sadness behind those eyes, you saw into it, but you had your doubts that it was sadness.

when you noticed her plate, you felt yourself flash her a smile too. she returned it, it was shy but still genuine. her plate was cleaned up just seconds after everyone served themselves.

crumbs of you, tara would take. she cherished that smile you gave to her, even if it was forced or accidental. it filled her brain.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

washing up had to be done, you wanted do it yourself, saying how you were on a roll from cooking that you wanted to do the cleaning too.

sam was about to speak up but suddenly, tara found her voice.

“i’ll help!” she said, chirping up. everyone looked at her with confusion. they didn’t expect that she would do that for you.

“oh… okay!” you said, making your way over to the kitchen.

you scrubbed the plates and handed them to her to dry. it was a good system that worked.

“you did well with dinner today. your cooking is always good.” tara smiled at you.

“thank you, tara. i appreciate it.” your lips pressed into a thin line.

“i just wanted to say that.” she put the plates onto the drying rack. “we haven’t spoken in a while.”

“i know. i just wanted to give you space. i felt like i wasn’t much help to you ever. and i felt like i wouldn’t be much help now.” you confessed. “but i want to stick around, i would be a pretty shit person if i didn’t.”

she felt horrible that you thought that you wouldn’t be help. in fact, there were some nights that tara found herself longing for you.

“we were friends before this, do you think we’d be able to get back to that?” she asked, searching your face for hope. but all she saw was doubt.

“maybe, tara.” you turned to her, handing her the last of the dishes. you saw the dejected look on her face and sighed. you wanted to go back to that too, you missed the tara that was a good friend to you. “but we can try.”

tara’s face lit up, a bit of shock also hidden between the lines. “okay! yeah… let’s try.” she put the dish away and held her hand out, you chuckled but you shook it.

what you failed to see was your maybe friend’s sister staring at you both from the living room, her jaw tightened as tara touched you.

sam zoned back into the conversation, realising that the show they were watching was long gone and replaced by the news again.

there was another death.

sam erupted in her anger, suddenly storming into the kitchen, grabbing the sharpest knife that she owned.

you had no idea what just happened, tara followed her sister back to the living room, the commotion having everyone sit up.

“sam! slow down!” tara yelled after her sister, you joined them after putting the dishes away. “can we please think about this before you decide to abandon my college education?!”

you couldn’t blame sam for wanting to leave. this was something that she just wanted to escape. as much as you would be upset, you would understand. you’d help, even.

you would help them pack up if it meant they were away from everything. you were prepared to never speak of the carpenter sisters again, in hopes that they would never have to go through this again.

“this can’t just be a coincidence, tara!” sam yelled back at her. today was the day where you saw the genetic stubbornness displayed by the carpenter sisters.

“quinn, can you please call your dad?!” tara asked their roommate, quinn immediately nodded. you could tell she didn’t want to get yelled at by sam but it was a reasonable point of action.

ring!!!

everyone flinched. you didn’t. it was just a phone ringing to you, but to everyone else, it was so much more.

sam’s phone blared on the table, she walked over only to see that it was gale weathers, she declined the call without a doubt.

you watched as quinn travelled across the room, telling sam that her father wanted to speak to her. you heard the muffled voice of mr. bailey from where you were standing.

“okay, thank you. i’ll be right there.” sam hung up. “he wants me down at the station.”

“i’ll drive you.” you said, grabbing your keys. “i live close to the station.”

“you shouldn’t have to—“ you cut sam off.

“no. i will. no man left behind, remember?” you said, firm in your decision. sam sighed but nodded.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

you, sam, and tara made it out the door and started to walk to your car.

suddenly, sam’s phone rang again. the two girls stopped when they saw the name displayed on the screen.

richie kirsch.

richie? you recognized that name. you huddled closer to the sisters, closing your eyes to rack your memory for where you knew that name.

no. wait.

it couldn’t be. he was dead, wasn’t he?

“don’t pick that up.” tara said, looking up at sam.

sam hesitated, but it could be important. these calls were life or death for them. she picked up.

you looked at your surroundings. you suddenly felt so exposed, like anything could happen to you now that you weren’t in the comforts of your own home— or anyone’s home.

“who is this?” sam asked into the phone. you couldn’t hear the responses, only sam’s facial expressions changing as time went on.

her eyebrows furrowed, her eyes changed. you saw woodsboro glaze her pupils, you knew she was thinking back to her life before the city. everything was resurfacing.

“i want you to think long and hard about whether or not you wanna do this because the last two people that fucked with us ended up dead.” she said, planting her feet down with determination.

your eyes started to tear away from sam, not absorbing the conversation.

bad gut feeling.

you had to stop ignoring those.

“you better watch your back, asshole.” sam said.

and tara yelled.

a cloaked figure sporting a ghostface mask suddenly grabbed tara, you sprung into action. tara elbowed the figure and you shoved him into the bike rack.

“go!” you said, running just behind the two sisters.

“there!” sam redirected you into a little corner store. you stood with your front to the door while the girls yelled at the cashier to help them, starting a fight with someone in line.

suddenly ghostface walked in.

you backed up into sam, pushing her backwards a little bit while one of the customers stood tall in front of the infamous killer.

you watched as ghostface drove their knife into the man, multiple times.

you gasped, your hand flying to your mouth. you had never seen anyone get killed before. you thought ghostface had specific targets, this wasn’t just an ordinary killer, this killer wasn’t afraid to take any life that stood in his way.

you turned around and the three of you flooded into the back of the store as the clerk wielded his gun.

when the first gunshot rang, sam’s arm flew to cover you as chips flew everywhere. tara was crouched just beside the two of you.

suddenly, there was a second gunshot. but only after you heard the clerk start begging for his life.

you tried to stay quiet, you didn’t realise where parts of your body were. you had a hand on sam’s abdomen, bunching her shirt into your fist. you were terrified, you had never gone through this before. you couldn’t imagine what sam & tara were feeling.

you couldn’t move— or else he would know where you were.

the corner store was quiet, it was like a cruel game of cat and mouse. you heard crunching as the sound of boots got closer to you.

all three of you rounded the corner to avoid detection. sam hid behind a freezer while you and tara hid behind the shelving. you saw sam’s eyes flicker to a can on the ground and you knew what she was trying to say.

carefully, you reached out and picked the can off the floor. it was disgusting and sticky. was this what they had to result to when defending themselves? putting themselves in disgusting situations? you felt twisted picturing them going through this once— now twice.

you threw the can across the corner store, hearing boots walk in the other direction. it was a successful distraction. the three of you started crawling towards the exit.

when you heard the boots stop moving again, you paused. sam leaned forward, you could tell that she could see a lot clearer than you. she slowly inched towards the shelving, then she suddenly shoved it with her shoulder, knocking it down.

god, she was strong.

had she been training herself to get stronger? in case this happened again?

the three of you hauled ass to the exit, being met with cop cars and their sirens.

the three of you were escorted into the cars. the sisters rode in one while you went in the other. you fidgeted with your fingers. then it was daunting on you.

baby’s first ghostface attack.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

you sat in an interrogation room at the precinct. the walls were closing in on you.

you had been close to death before. you remember when you and your parents got into that gnarly car accident that had you coming out with several broken bones and whiplash. you cradled your arm, feeling the after-effects of the worst injury you sustained.

but this wasn't a car t-boning yours. this was a killer.

and you felt like death was kissing your cheek.

you didn't know where sam and tara were, you assumed a different interrogation room. you were waiting for ages, you thought that maybe someone was attending to them first.

you sat in silence for about ten more minutes, trying to decompress the situation.

the lock clicked and the door swung open, revealing detective bailey. you had met quinn's dad in passing, never really speaking to him.

"mr. bailey. how are you?" you asked him, sitting up in your chair. you noticed he had files in his hand. this was going to take longer than you wanted.

"i'm good. thank you... how are you doing? you weren't around for woodsboro, i'm sure it's a bit of a shock to be involved now." straight into it.

"a bit is an understatement, sir." you let out a dry chuckle. "i'm assuming you're going to be asking me more than just 'how are you' though..."

"i'm sorry. i know you're probably tired." he sighed, you nodded. you were trying to hold back a yawn.

"it's fine."

he sat down across from you, opening the file and putting its contents in front of you.

"you're the newest addition to the group, quinn has talked about you. i know you and tara had a past relationship. were you frequently in and out of their apartment?" he asked.

"yeah... tara and i were together for a bit. i usually visited her and i also hang out with mindy and chad, so yes, i was frequently at theirs." you nodded, you often found that honesty was the best policy with these things.

"i know that your relationship with her ended badly." he stated, you scoffed.

"surely a bad break-up isn't enough motivation to go on these killing sprees, right?" you asked, a bit offended.

"sometimes it might just be."

"did you have access to sam carpenter's belongings?" he followed up. what did sam's stuff have to do with this?

"um... no. not really. i never really interacted with sam until ghostface was rumored to resurface. and even then, i don't really have that access." you crossed your arms across your chest, your eyes scanning the photos on the desk. you spotted a photo of sam's license, bloodied and dumped at the scene of the crime.

someone was trying to frame her.

"we found sam's license next to the body."

"well she was with me all day. we went grocery shopping and i cooked everyone dinner." you quickly jumped at the chance to defend her. "tara was there too."

mr. bailey nodded at you confirming their alibi.

"sam said the same thing." he reassured you. he leaned in a bit closer to you. "although, i'd be cautious about those sisters. especially sam. i wouldn't get too close."

your brows furrowed in frustration.

"i'm sure i have nothing to worry about. they're good people." you didn't want to speak any further on the matter.

you hated that the thought of either of them being responsible for these deaths even crossed the detective's mind. he was supposed to be helping them.

two knocks against the door turned the detective's attention to another officer walking into the room.

"the fbi is here." the officer said. detective bailey looked confused.

"the fbi? where?" he stood up then turned to you. "you're free to go. i think sam and tara are waiting for you."

you stood from your seat and followed him, making your way over to the two dark-haired sisters. tara was the first to spot you, nudging sam until she turned around.

you sped up, you didn't know what it was. you just had to make sure she was real.

you wrapped your arms around sam. you felt her tense up out of shock but return the gesture.

"i'm sorry." you apologised for the sudden hug.

"it's okay." sam smiled warmly.

you turned to tara and put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing softly.

tara's eyes met yours. those pleading doe eyes, they wanted more than just a squeeze on the shoulder. she wished she was sam in that moment.

"i'm really glad you two are okay." you cleared your throat. sam smiled at you, even if it was forced, it was nice to see.

you heard two voices chatting just a little bit aways from you. sam started moving towards them, you and tara followed behind.

"kirby?" she spoke, getting the attention of a blonde woman.

"hey sam." kirby replied, moving to hug sam as well.

"do you know each other?" bailey asked.

"yeah... we went to woodsboro high together. she was a senior when i was a freshman." sam clarified. you studied the woman in front of you.

all you could say was that she looked cool. she was an fbi agent that had been monitoring the sisters for a little while. you realised that this had been the kirby involved with the killings too. they shared a very unique experience between each other.

you stayed behind sam while they conversed. kirby was handed the mask that was left at the scene. the mask used in the 2011 killings. kirby lifted her shirt to show the scar that charlie walker gave her.

sam looked uncomfortable. she realised then that this was bigger than just a killing spree, they were trying to send a message.

kirby proposed you all worked together but sam interjected, not giving her the chance to finish.

"we're getting out of town." she pushed through kirby and detective bailey.

"i'm sorry, that's not possible. you're both persons of interest. all three of you are." bailey warned.

"are you serious?" tara stepped forward, the growing frustration evident in her voice.

"he's right." kirby confirmed. "but if we work together-"

"we're going." sam basically barked an order at you and tara.

"my car's back at your place." you said. sam nodded. a small part of her brain was happy that you would be around after that.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

when the three of you made your way out of the precinct, you had never seen so many cameras before. reporters swarmed the three of you, immediately asking sam questions like if she had an alibi or if tara felt safe with her sister.

they didn't pay you any mind, how could they? you were fresh meat to the group, they didn't care about your story. luckily, it allowed you to mercilessly shove them back, helping make space for sam and tara to walk through the flood.

you found yourself holding onto sam's waist, pulling her towards the open spots you've created with your body pushing against the reporters.

"gale weathers." a voice sounded out in the crowd, causing the sisters to stop in their tracks. you knew that name too, it felt like an endless revision on who was who, if you had studied well enough. "do you ladies think that you're the reason that the ghostface killer has come to the big apple?" she asked.

you saw it in sam. she snapped. she'd had a long night, she nearly lost her life. she nearly lost her sister. and her... friend.

she swung with her fist out.

"sam!" you exclaimed as gale ducked, avoiding the punch. you pulled sam's waist back, you knew she didn't need another video of her going viral. she put her hands over yours, allowing you to hold her back. you had to admit, it felt nice knowing you had a bit of pull on her.

although, you failed to account for the shorter carpenter sister. you failed to catch her pulling her elbow back and swinging at gale with a force of her own.

you jumped at the noise made by the contact and had to hold back a laugh at gale's shocked face. sam cracked a smile, she couldn't help herself.

"stay away from us." tara spat at gale.

you two turned to walk towards a cab that was parked outside the station. you pushed sam slightly by her waist, hoping she wouldn't turn back around.

but gale weathers just had to say something.

"are you two seriously still mad about what happened?"

"you wrote a book. about them." she didn't expect you to say anything. she didn't know who you were or what you were to the carpenters. she looked at you as if you were irrelevant, like another body that ghostface could dispose of just to raise the numbers.

"and who are you?" she asked, a snark in her voice.

"doesn't matter. you took advantage of them. of the fact that they lost their friends, they nearly lost each other." you shook your head. "i remember you, from tara's stories."

tara watched you fight back. how could you still do that after she hurt you? you were full of surprises. she had never seen your tongue so laced with venom before.

"you lost someone too. dewey... if someone kept shoving that down your throat, how would you feel?" you asked, glaring her way as sam and tara entered the cab. gale's stance shifted, she was uncomfortable with a stranger knowing so much information about her personal life. but then again, she put the carpenter sisters' life out there for the whole world to see.

"i remember your book too. you called sam unstable, you painted her in the worst light possible. and i thought you had been through enough with her to know that that's not true." you turned back to the two girls, opening the door to the back of the cab for them.

sam's face was unreadable as she hopped into the car. she stared at the back of your head, or more like the back of your seat. you stood up for her, breaking your kind and golden-hearted demeanour. she was worried that being in this situation would change you for the worst.

you sat in silence after telling the driver where to go. leaning back into your seat, you tried to keep your eyes open. you hadn't gotten any sleep since last night, your time divided between the carpenter residence and the station.

there was so little to say and yet so many words were jumbled in your brain.

when you arrived at the carpenter's apartment, you yawned as you exited the cab. sam caught you do so and stopped you before you could unlock your car. her hand covered yours, gripping it in her own.

"you should rest here for a little bit. you're too tired to drive." she said, looking down at you. you wanted to get home and sleep in your own bed but you knew she was right.

you put your car keys away and walked upstairs with them.

tara immediately made a beeline for the bathroom. she always showered after coming home, she couldn't go a day without smelling like vanilla.

sam put pillows and blankets down on their couch and walked into her room, coming back out with some clothes.

"you can change into these for now, you might as well make yourself comfortable. and you can sleep for as long as you want." she said, you took the clothes and nodded at her.

she sat down on the couch and pulled the blanket up slightly to cover herself, you grabbed the blanket to stop her.

"what are you doing? i'll take the couch." you said, furrowing your brows.

"no. you'll take my bed." she looked up at you from the couch.

"it's your damn bed, sam." you didn't mean to sound so ill-mannered but the tiredness was getting the best of you.

"i know. so i'll do with it as i please." you know it was just her trying to show that she cared. "so you're taking it."

you sighed sharply, you were about to take a massive risk.

"share it with me." you said, holding your ground. you didn't want to kick sam out of her own bed.

she saw the determination on your face. you two were going to sit here and bicker if she didn't give in now. she nodded, standing up and making her way back to her room.

you changed into sam's clothes, her scent wafting as the shirt fell over your figure. then you cracked the door open enough to slip yourself into her room.

just as you entered sam's room, tara came out of the bathroom. she had the look of a shattered woman on her face, you should have been going into her room. she should have offered first.

you shut the door behind you, walking towards the bed where sam was sitting. you spotted her nursing her hand, spotting a deep cut from crawling on glass at the bodega.

"sam, you should've gotten that taken care of." you scolded her a little, walking to her bathroom and grabbing a medkit you knew was there. tara had told you that she put one in every bathroom.

you knelt in front of sam, unpacking the kit to grab the antiseptic and a bandage.

"it's fine, it's only a cut." she protested.

"if ghostface doesn't get you, an infected cut will. and i think that's extremely embarrassing." you tried to make light of it, your exhaustion washing over you. "this'll hurt."

you dabbed the antiseptic into sam's cut. she hissed at the sting. but the sight in front of her was better. you, in her clothes, patching her up. this was probably the worst time for her to form a crush, and probably the worst person to form it on. her sister's ex-girlfriend, who was now involved in the ghostface killings. but your soft features, your concern for her, it was hard to resist you.

she chalked it up to exhaustion, maybe this crush would fade away when she was in her right mind.

but when you situated yourself next to her in bed, your respectful nature forcing you to leave ample space so you two weren't touching each other, she hoped that she would one day earn the honour of closing that gap.

as she closed her eyes, she listened in to your soft breathing. and even when you accidentally ended up shoulder to shoulder in bed,

sam refused to move.

𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩 𓆪𓆩

author's journal okay i actually spent way too much time on this chapter, i had to write out the first 30 minutes of scream vi with a reader insert so it was a little bit more cohesive with the storyline. i don't know how i feel about this one chapter in particular but i'm starting to see the vision for the rest of the series teehee. i promise it wont just be the whole movie written down but it'll definitely have canon events. next chapter is most likely going to be non-canon as much as possible just cause this is a romance fic at the end of the day.

also this is the song i intended for the reader to be listening to with sam

[revelboo]

Waitng patiently for a new insecticons story (i love them so much, thanks to you. Please dont die)

I will try my hardest not to 🤣 I’m just on the struggle bus today

You (Don’t) Know Me Pt 7

Insecticons x Reader

• Wary as they watch you, it’s like they’re waiting on something. They’ve called you their queen more than once. Mentioned a coronation, though the details get a bit hazy, lost in the heated ache of need when they’d kissed you, when that one had gone down on you. Body flushing at that memory as you wiggle out from between Kickback and Shrapnel, pulling one of the blankets you’re sitting on up over your lap so everything isn’t just on display. “What if I don’t want to be your queen?” You ask slowly and the other two both look at Bombshell, tensing. Big guy is definitely the one in charge. “Hypothetically,” you add as his head tips.

• “Hypothetically, you’re of little value except as food if you’re not our queen,” Bombshell growls, long glossa curling around a servo to clean it. Aware of the way you watch him, grinning crookedly as his battle mask clicks back together. It’s a threat plain and simple, a hollow one. Those two idiots have at least partially bonded you. Forcing his hand. And after having you, he can’t really deny that he’s decided he wants to keep you, too. Had imagined a fierce queen, but maybe a soft queen that looks to him for protection wouldn’t be so bad. Someone who needs him. Who won’t curtail his plans.

• “This hive is only temporary,” Kickback says into the silence when you lean further away from all of them. “Not fit for a queen.” Antenna back, he leans over to lay his head in your lap, pretending he doesn’t notice when you tense. “We’ll do better. Bigger, more fitting for you.” Room for young, room to expand. Freezing when you hesitantly lift a hand and touch his antenna. Gently. So gently ghosting your fingers against him. Has anyone touched him like that before?

• Heck of a choice. Play queen of the scary, bug robots or be dinner. The big one had asked you to make demands. Seemed to expect it, like maybe you’re supposed to take charge. Play queen. Mouth dry as you toy with Kickback’s antenna to make him shiver and chirp against you, you can’t break Bombshell’s stare. The challenge in it. “This place is drafty. Dirty. Not a proper hive,” you manage, rolling with it and all three of them go still. Listening. “And I’m not eating that.”

• Struggling to suppress his laughter as Bombshell goes rigid in offense at your scorn, Shrapnel clears his vents noisily. Can’t help but grin, though. “Organics eat flesh,” Bombshell growls, sweeping his hand at the deer. And Shrapnel’s starving, but won’t touch it until you eat. ‘Not raw,’ you counter, little chin lifting. ‘Cook it.’ And he is laughing now, not even caring how angry Bombshell is, because this is too delicious. You’re figuring out your place. Taking charge like you’re meant to.

• Heart racing as Bombshell looms over you, there’s fear that maybe you pushed him too hard. That you pissed him off and he’s going to lash out. Instead he just stares down at you, seizes Shrapnel by one of the beetle-like horns jutting up from his shoulders and yanks him up as he hisses. Ordering him to dig a fire pit. And you shouldn’t get a little thrill out of being obeyed by them. You should be plotting your escape, not idly playing with Kickback’s antenna. Freezing when he loops his arms around you and presses his face against your stomach, venting.

Previous

Next

[becausegraf]

Everything You Put Me Through - what is this ‘everything’ really?

Featuring: 

1) Interpreting the actual meaning of Blitz’ angry rant

2) A look into how Stolas misheard him just like most of us did, and 

3) A side-track into how they both gave the wrong signals about what they actually wanted from each other right from the start.

So, idk if this is a new-ish idea or not but

I've been pondering that moment where Blitz goes 'After *everything you've put me through*!!' during their one-sided argument, because it just didn't make a whole lotta sense to me.

The *obvious* reading would be that he means everything as in 'the sex arrangement [that I didn't like but didn't object to]' and I get the impression that's what most people read it as, taking it at face-value. 

It makes no sense though, as we see all kinds of evidence for Blitz actually *wanting* the arrangement to stay exactly as it is. Both before the Full Moon and after he shows his motivation to stick with their deal, and ‘it makes sense’ to him. He's at least physically into Stolas and Stolas is into him, for as far as he knows/hopes, what could possibly be wrong about continuing to have regular sex dates they both enjoy?

Throwing out that accusation of Stolas putting him through something upsetting, I personally felt like he was talking out of his ass spouting something aggressive just to channel his anger *somewhere*, including the whole tangent he went on with the whole 'not taking the lower class seriously' thing. 

Sure, it's an angle you can definitely consider, but it just seemed to have so little to do with their actual interactions around their agreement, and with what was happening right there and then?? The dismissive ‘bye Blitz I'm done talking please leave’ attitude, sure, but something about his rant doesn't seem on-topic enough to be about JUST that.

-

All that said, I think I finally figured something out:

He's talking about explicitly everything *other than the sex part*

‘The sex part’ is specifically what he WAS okay with, but it's the whole 'ugh wtf is he trying to do here, playing at us being actual friends and him caring about me' that was NOT part of the agreement that caused by far the most emotional distress to Blitz, and what I think he had in mind when thinking of 'stuff Stolas put him through' that he'd *actually* have struggled with.

Like.... this might sound kinda backwards but I can see Blitz legitimately struggling with 'how dare he put me in this situation where he gets hurt and I feel like it's my fault, and somehow I'm supposed to care and I DO care but what the fuck am I supposed to *do with that*.'

- because that'd be the sort of emotional challenge that'd really throw him off and make him feel absolutely terrible.

'If he'd just kept this business-only, I wouldn't be this conflicted.’

If it was ‘just business’ and nothing more, there would be neither the expectation nor the justification to approach Stolas and everything about him like a friend. Blitz *needs* it to be unambiguously ‘just business’ for his own comfort and sanity, because if it isn't… 

Example:

A prissy rich boy just looking to get giggity living out his fantasy couldn't possibly give a fuck if his ‘plaything’ to be ignored outside of fun times didn't come see him at the hospital, right? If that's what this is (and to Blitz that was the only believable option), to go visit him would be an enormous risk, and a huge emotionally messy one at that, given what happened the last time he tried to see someone he cared about who got hurt because of him. 

Yeah hahah, no. It's way easier to tell himself Stolas doesn't care, than to open THAT whole can of worms and push himself into the purgatory of being rejected in anger or be made fun of for being so stupid as to think Stolas might have wanted him there for real.

It's that internal emotional turmoil that really messes him up, and that he resents Stolas for. 

‘Why can't he just play by the obvious rules and keep it simple and clean, why does he have to do this pretend-bullshit making me almost think he actually values me, and make it so hard to keep my distance and stay detached, damnit!’

Because if that's what Stolas was actually doing, that would 1000% count as ‘playing with someone's feelings’, wouldn't it?

The annoying nicknames and the 'having sex appointments' stuff is not remotely the sort of thing that actually bothers someone like Blitz that much. It's maybe a nuisance or inconvenience, but there's no way he actually has deep-seated emotional pain about that. 

Stolas trying harder and harder to invite him closer and get to know him, THAT would be what would piss Blitz off, because he could only see it as this owl dragging him into some dumb roleplay. And that is what would actually, genuinely hurt to be a part of, because he wishes it *could* be real.

When Stolas ‘plays at being his friend in earnest’, Blitz thoroughly hates how it makes him feel.

Stolas is NOT pretending, but that's 100% inconceivable to Blitz. It being genuine is the one possible interpretation he can't risk taking seriously because if he's *wrong* oh my lord…

‘This hurts and I wished he'd stop doing what's causing me to feel this way.’

At this point in time, Blitz can't process his own feelings well enough to comprehend that that's what's causing him this pain, so all he feels is agitation over something vague. 

He feels anger, some resentment towards Stolas, and the only proper explanation he can give to himself is that Stolas is being thoughtless and disrespectful towards him - of course he'd be bothered and annoyed. That makes sense in his mental framework.

‘This whole thing he does, pretending to give a shit for real makes me feel like garbage, and he just keeps doing it like it's nothing, because he's just a total braindead douche when it comes to that specific stuff. He doesn't get why he needs to stop at *all*.’’

Blitz is walled off from his own vulnerable yearning and desires by fifteen layers of deflection and ignoring and irony. 

He tells himself he hates Stolas’ disrespectful, patronizing attitude, when the core of it is *disappointment* and self-doubts, and how it triggers his sense of unworthiness and hopelessness about never being able to have anything ‘real’.

He *genuinely* didn't get it, as obvious as it seems from an external POV, and other than Fizz nobody had any reason to challenge him on that. Other parties either didn't care, saw it just like Blitz did, or had no idea Blitz could be *that* freaking blind. 

Example:

Millie goofily referring to Stolas as Blitz's ‘boyfriend’ to her parents. Blitz responds as if she's disrespectfully joining in with Stolas’ thoughtless making a mockery of his feelings just to tease him, rather than being affectionately cheeky about this odd but kind of cute situationship he has going on and ‘pretends’ to be in denial about.

-

ALL OF THIS makes what he said when he blew up at Stolas make perfect sense.

... and it also means Stolas misheard it as 'he thinks I'm just some shallow sex fiend using him for pleasure' instead of 'he's mad at me because to him it sounded like all my attempts to be nice to him were just a messed up powerplay, despite me meaning every word of it'.

To Stolas, Blitz thinking he'd be that shallow is easy to believe because it's the most obviously logical possibility, AND it's also kind of his worst fear at that point. 

The notion of his genuine interest and tenderness being consistently misread, by comparison, is a pretty strange mental twist. It *almost* makes no sense at all that someone could only half-intentionally misconstrue regular kind messages as some contrived fucked up performance.

'When did I ever play with his feelings, it can't be all the times I tried to be nice to him with no strings attached because I really meant that in earnest... so it's gotta be the sex arrangement he's mad over??'

No wonder he took it the way he did.

-

Now, for my third section - it's quite the tragicomedy that their first reunion as adults was a whole pile-up of giving each other inaccurate impressions of what the other one actually wanted.

'Are you here to ravish me' = oh okay, owl do be randy??? thinketh a Blitz

'Oh hey there buddy, want me to ravish you then~?' = oh uh wow uh um ok he's here because he's actually for real into me????? wondereth a Stolas

and then they just kept that little 'roleplay' of trying to give the other what they thought they wanted from each other going, assuming that was the actual primary motivation of the other (when really Blitz was there for the book and Stolas had no idea what he was getting himself into and he was just making shit up on the fly half sloshed).

They pretty much *showed* each other that yes, they do in fact want-a-da-sex from each other, pretty explicitly,

and the deal they struck was just a convenient excuse to keep seeing each other.

It's not that hard to see how Stolas' thinking went there... 

‘Hey so, that was the most amazing thing ever and oh my goodness me, if Blitz actually likes me that way and as an aside he can use the grimoire too, um, well, tee hee hee? maybe we can make it a regular thing officially~?’

He called it favours for favours, but really it's sex for sex, and the grimoire's kind of a bonus tossed in because it makes a neat story, for as far as he's concerned. He clearly didn't have any intentions of withholding it if Blitz wanted a different arrangment.

'Let's keep having dates under this little fun guise of borrowing my book, because hee hee hoo hoo that's a neat dramatic plot device just like in my novels.'

He only way later clues into the implications of it as 'wait shit he does actually really need that book for real, this is kinda messed up despite never intending to lord it over him like this'.

Stolas *would* be the kind of dork to think of it like some romance story where the fated lovers come up with some cover story to continue their passionate forbidden tryst

... and it also makes scheduling really simple, HAH. 

(I mean scheduling can be *such* a pain in the ass, anyone who's ever played DnD would know that well enough, right~? Consistency is key ehehehehe.)

[im-not-a-ghost]

Their feelings and intentions towards you

In this reading we will try to figure out how the person you’re thinking about feels about you and what their intentions are. There will be three sections for each group :

1. How do they feel for you currently?

2. What are their intentions?

3. Advice on how to deal with this connection

The decks I will use are :

The White Numen tarot for the first two sections

The below the surface oracle deck and the Threads of fate deck for the last section

Group 1 - Saturn 🪐

1. Their feelings - knight of cups, king of pentacles, 9 of pentacles, 4 of pentacles, 4 of swords, knight of wands

This person is very serious when it comes to you. Their feelings are authentic, genuine. They're not playing games with you. They respect you and value you for who you are. They are grounded in how they perceive you and what they feel for you. This isn't just a whim, a little crush that will eventually fade away. No, this is solid and meant to last in their eyes. This person would tend to hide all of that deep beneath because they're unsure of how you feel toward them. They also feel very protective of you, intimidated in some way because their opinion of you is very high. You check all their boxes. They feel attracted to you both emotionally and physically. The numbers 4, 44 and 12 could be meaningful in this connection. They like to quietly stare at you when you're not looking, especially when you're working. They find your motivation and dedication very attractive. They feel safe with you and they can see in your gaze that you give importance to what they have to say, what they bring to the table. They feel curious, even more so when you're guarded around them.

2. Their intentions - Black Numen, King of pentacles, ace of swords, 10 of swords, The Emperor rx, The Moon

They would love to communicate with you and be honest about what they feel. But they don't think they're in a good mindset to do so. This person is facing a lot of hardships currently. They don't feel like they'd show you the best of them if they were to come forward right now. They don't want to look weak or out of balance in front of you. This person intends to keep their distance for now and hide from you the pain they're in. They wish to hide from you that an important cycle of their life is ending. They're waiting for this cycle to end to find an opportunity to be clear about what they want from this connection. They want to move on but they're aware that they need to heal first. This person is really mature and wouldn't do anything that would hurt you. They would rather be in pain than voluntarily cause you sorrow.

3. Advice - Higher perspective, 13 Dumbo Octopus - stop chasing, 33 spotted eagle ray - Let it go

Keep your distance from this person and give them the space to figure out a solution on their own. There's nothing you can control in this situation except for how it impacts you. If you keep pushing this person, you might get an outcome you won't be happy about. So leave it to them and the Universe. You have to trust that this person will take the best decision for them, no matter the outcome and you have to respect that. What you can do is also asking your guides for advice before making any irrational decision. By keeping your distance, I feel like you'll see this situation with more clarity. It's like taking a bird's eye view of what's going on. This person will come to you naturally when the time is right.

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️

Group 2 - Sun and Moon 🌞🌛

1. Their feelings - page of swords, The Emperor, 6 of wands, Judgment, 5 of swords, 7 of wands

Not gonna lie, I don't get the best vibes for this group. It feels to me like this person wants to control you and keep you under their influence. They feel in control and pretty positive, because they know that you like them or that you can't deny them anything. For instance, if this person is your boss, they know that you wouldn't cross them or you wouldn't leave because you can't. So it gives them a lot of power and they're quite smug about it. They feel victorious, like a conquerer that has slain the beast. They have you under scrutiny. They watch your every move. They feel proud about themselves but also about you to some extent because you follow their lead well or they think you take after them. It's like they trained you well. They feel very combattive and possessive over you. They would litterally fight for you. If anyone comes near you, this person would snap. I get the feeling for some this person has acted behind your back to deter some people that were interested in you from interacting with you. They've withheld information to keep you in a state of neediness. They would bend the truth to their advantage. Like not telling you that a certain person likes you or that an opportunity has been presented to you. If it's business related, they speak in your name but not in your best interest. Like, imagine there's a superior that wants to entrust you with a project but since they're not sure if you're available or skilled enough, they go to this person for advice. And this person blatantly lies about your schedule or your skills, like "oh no this is too early for them, they're not ready for such a responsibility because this and that". And since they're influencial, nobody questions their input.

2. Their intentions - The Emperor, queen of cups, page of cups, The Star, 8 of swords, The Hermit

This is so twisted. Without any surprise, their intentions aren't the best for you. They want to keep you under their control and they intend to put you in a position of feeling compassion and gratitude for them to blind you and make sure you never leave their side. In some twisted way, this person "loves" you. Or at least they think they do. But really, they only love themselves and they want to use you to make them feel better. This person is tired of being alone at the top and they kinda want to create you in their image so that they're not alone and they have someone that gives credit to their BS. They hope that you can be their partner in crime. I'm getting serious god complex vibes and narcisstic tendencies from this person, this gives me the ick. They want to isolate you so that they can keep you to themselves like you're some kind of prized possession. One more trophy on their list of accomplishments. They're the kind of person that has weird fetishes. Like the kind of people that only entertains relationship with foreign people to convince others they're not a racist when clearly all they do is degrading this person and their culture. They're a fake friend, fake ally. They would litterally compliment you then manage to bring you down in the span of a few sentences. Like "oh yeah this person is so clever. Well people like them can only be that if they want to rob us of our jobs". Honestly they're so up their own arse the only thing they intend to do is to try to make themselves feel better by making you look pitiful. Ew.

3. Advice - The Wildling, Ask Body, 31 flying gurnard - Ask yourself if it's worth it

Cut the cord. Ask a healer to cut all ties with this person. Get them banned from your energy and life. Cleanse your body, spirit, heart from this person's presence. Set yourself free. Reclaim your power. You don't deserve what they put you through. Fight for your independence, your honor. Be smarter than them. Learn to see through the masks and read through the lines. Notice the patterns and swiftly move through the spider web they've been trying to weave around you. Invoke your spirit animal's help to kick them out of your life and protect you from their malevolent energy. The panther spirit could be relevent to you. I ask spirit to watch over you and keep you away from this person's evil doings.

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️

Group 3 - Waxing gibbous moon🌔

1. Their feelings - Queen of cups, king of swords, The Magician, 10 of cups, 7 of cups, 2 of wands

Thank God we have a better energy in this group. They feel pretty postitively towards you. They feel hopeful and curious. They admire you and want to care for you. They have a lot of feelings for you. They consider you as a good option for them, especially because they think you'd be a good partner to have a family with. They envision a future with you. They are expectant when it comes to you because you keep them on their toes. You feel easy to read to them but also like a mystery they can't wait to unravel. They feel like you're magical and their destiny. They feel lucky and happy to be in your life and have you in theirs. They feel proud because you're a good person and they think they had a role to play in that. If group 2's person feelings were really toxic, this person only has your best interest at heart. They think of you highly and want to uplift you in every way they can. They want to support you, to celebrate you, to elevate you. They want to bring value to your essence and help you be the best version of yourself because they think you have a lot of potential. They view you as their equal but also as the missing piece to their puzzle. They feel like you would complement them and balance out their energies. They feel like you'd make a good team and that every moment spent with you is an adventure they're happy to experience. I have a very good feeling about this group.

2. Their intentions - 4 of wands, The Fool, Queen of cups, The Magician, 8 of cups, Page of cups

Out of the three groups, this one has the highest romantic potential. For some of you, this person wants to offer you commitment, possibly a proposal but if not they definitely want to have a lasting partnership with you. They intend to communicate their feelings and intentions, to make the connection evolve into something more solid. They're not afraid to make the first step and start anew with you, to discover you in a different setting, to get to know you even more. They intend to manifest you, to manifest a relationship with you. This person wants to move on with you and take things to a new level. They want to openly love you. They're tired of games and superficial relationships. They want something meaningful and they intend to work for it. This person is ready to be honest and authentic, to let you see them as they are, without any mask nor restraint. They wish to show you the good nature of their feelings and the best side of them. They want to appeal to you, to seduce you and win your heart and affection. Honestly they're so sweet. They could ask you out on a date, possibly a travel where there's water involved. I can picture people going to the beach, a water park or going kayaking on a river. Walking by a body of water during the Summer. For some I'm getting that this person has calculated everything to be able to cross paths with you on a specific day. And they would be like, "oh group 3! Fancy meeting you here, I didn't know you'd be there. Mind if I join you?" when clearly they've been waiting for this opportunity for days and they knew you'd be there, who you'd be with, when to approach you. For some I'm picking up on a sports event. Like a race or something. And you participate and they nonchalantly offer to be your team mate as if they weren't actually hoping for no one to be with you so that they could get closer lmao

3. Advice - The Alchemist, Power, 2 hermit crab - finding shelter, 43 koi fish - don't take life too seriously

Spirit is saying "go for it" ! They ask you not to resist what's happening because this is something both of you have been manifesting on a subconscious level. Both of you were hoping for such a connection that would be so carefree and uplifting. A connection where you wouldn't have to mind guess or be afraid of what the other's gonna do. They're saying that you can trust this person to be good to you. Some of you might think this is too good to be true or that your relationship might be "inappropriate" when it's just your destiny and the Universe's answer to your prayers. They say "there's nothing to be ashamed of" and "don't worry about others" because clearly you deserve it and that's all that should matter. Don't overthink this and just surrender to the blissful moments you may experience with them. Keep being optimistic and open to the energies around you. Be confident about your ability to be appealing to this person and keep them interested. Be confident about your personality, your looks, your skills. Because this person will only have eyes for you. Trust your intuition.

[hotasfahrenheit]

i've had some thoughts rattling around my brain about Keen since episode 9 showed us flashbacks of the boys as kids when they were adopted and then a little older when they started their training for real, and this week's episode just added more fuel to the fire.

i think one of the saddest things that the last couple episodes have really exposed that a lot of people might miss because of the other bombshells that have been dropped is the fact that Keen was set up possibly even worse than Fadel and Bison were in this life. they were adopted together, told they were going to be a family, and then Lily manipulated them all into becoming who they are as adults. she lucked out that Bison and Fadel liked each other so much and bonded so strongly to each other, and she used that bond to isolate and control Keen in a completely different way.

Keen's desperate to be in the field like the other two and to be sent on missions; he doesn't have the same set of skills that they do and wasn't able to develop his talents in the same way, and it's clear that Lilly took the natural aptitude of Fadel and Bison and turned that into what they are now, but she chose to push Keen into the behind the scenes aspect of the business. she's also made it clear from the start which set of talents she values more as is clear from the way she glares at Keen when he can't shoot his bottle in the flashback.

Keen isn't given any kind of reassurance or support for missing his shot, or told to try again; Lily answers Bison's questions about why they need to learn to shoot by telling them that they have to learn to protect themselves, then she gives Keen a few more judgey looks, implying it's something she doesn't expect him to be able to do. the next scene in the flashback is her giving Bison and Fadel their first assignment, and by this point Keen has already been relegated to being the paper guy and having an office job.

these kids all lost their parents and are gathered up by Lily at the same time and told they're going to be a family; they look like they're all roughly the same age. we all know how seriously Fadel and Bison take to the brother relationship, but Keen is pushed to the outside of this by Lily and her priorities. i had figured before episode 10 that they had been trained together for a longer period of time and maybe Keen had just not gotten along with them because he was jealous of their talents, but Fadel telling Style that he doesn't really know anything about Keen besides that they were adopted at the same time says to me that Lilly purposefully kept them apart instead of it being their choice.

Fadel saying they don't care about Keen makes me so sad for him. the fact that he only really knows that Keen was adopted at the same time and does other work for Lilly that's not in the field means they don't care because they don't know him at all. they haven't had the chance to bond with him the way that they did with each other. they weren't pushed together with him; they were pushed to each other, and Keen was pushed off on his own to watch them be the favoured children and struggle by himself.

imagine your parents are murdered in front of you, you're scooped up by this woman who says she's going to take care of you and build a family with you and two other boys your age who have been through the same experience, but then you're not as good as the other two boys at the tasks she sets you, plus the two of them deeply connect to each other and fall into a sibling bond and leave you outside of it. that you're kept so separate from them that despite being a "family" for years, they know basically nothing about you, while your shared mother keeps dangling the things you want right outside of your grasp.

she's driven a wedge between the boys so deep that Keen resents Fadel and Bison enough to WANT try to kill them himself, while they don't have any idea that he would even be willing or able to. he's been kept so far out of their notice while their successes and talents have been constantly waved in front of him as well as being consistently put down by Lilly for his mistakes and inadequacies. she's pushed Keen into a corner and made him think that it's Fadel and Bison's fault for putting him there instead of it being a way for her to control him and keep him under her thumb.

Fadel and Bison have given the impression from the first episode that it's the two of them against the world; brothers bonded so tightly together that nothing can shake that. they have a Mother, but really they only have each other. it's the two of them and it always will be. but there were three of them. there were three boys when this started. and they don't care about Keen. he's alone.

i'm really hoping that the current situation snaps Keen the rest of the way out of Lilly's control. he should have already figured out what his future looks like if he really wants out of the family business like he's promised Thanon, because if he's known the entire time that Fadel's last boyfriend got murdered instead of just leaving, he should be fully aware that they face the same fate if he tries to leave Lilly. with that knowledge plus finding out that Lilly killed his parents along with Fadel's and Bison's, hopefully he turns on her and helps the others take her down. her lack of hesitation to send him or other hired hitmen after the two favoured sons should be a pretty clear signal to him about her willingness to off him as well at the drop of a hat.

fingers crossed that Keen and Thanon get to have a happy life far away from Lilly and that he finally gets to have an actual family that doesn't involve manipulation, abuse, and murder.

[rogerbarel]

I'm extremely emotional all the time about how Roger and Alfons are such easy, excellent foils for each other that only become more thematically intertwined the more you learn about them.

long post, unedited so it's probably disjointed and my observations may be totally banal OR pretentious and reaching idk, spoilers for both their routes (and a brief mention of late into Liam’s and Elbert’s) and possibly some events

They're a pair of insufferable, teasing, hedonistic, hard-drinking men with... questionable consent practices. That's how I'm gonna word that for the sake of not getting derailed. Anyway. They both couch their care for others in self-serving language (although that's not exclusive to them--Jude and Harry do it, too) and overall present themselves as selfish people. They're opposed in taste--beer vs whiskey, dogs vs cat, "refined" vs "rough" (although neither term encompasses them so well). They piss each other off but can't seem to totally detach from each other.

The contrast is immediate but gets emphasized even further in how they value their lives and whether or not they believe they can change their fates.

Alfons is resigned to tragedy and values nothing (or at least tries not to). He is ephemeral and meaningless, only temporarily holding whatever value others see in him, which really says more about them than him. It doesn't feel quite right to say that Alfons's life should neither add nor detract anything from this world--more, it's like any impact that Alfons makes needs to be easily attributable to someone else. Or maybe not? He's so quick to tell the robin to place responsibility for all their encounters on him... And a person you'll eventually forget makes a perfect scapegoat because the grudge and the pain can die with him.

Perhaps as a mirror, he aims to show you the happiest parts of yourself while letting your woes vanish in the mirror with him. And things get wonky when he finds himself with desires, wanting to reach out and mark you rather than finding amusement in just reflecting you.

(I'd like to see him paired in an event with Will and Ellis. Someone who pushes you to be the fullest "you" and someone who places your happiness above all else [or at least attempts to], who all fight with how their own desires conflict with what they otherwise want for you, and how that causes them Emotional Problems. But I'm not a Will or Ellis expert so don't ask me to elaborate on that. Hell, I'm not even an Alfons expert. I'm not an expert on anything! I make Harrison Greyglogabgalab memes and draw Roger’s giant tits!!)

Then there's Roger on his quest to best fate. He can't stop, he can't die. He has to value his life because he's the one doing all this important work! His life is what keeps it going! Nothing is hopeless--it's bleak, but never hopeless--unless he gives up. He is not going out of his way to please, he is here to get what he wants. It might align with what you want, and maybe making you happy is what'll make him happy in this moment, but he can't lose sight of his own priorities. He pisses Al off so much partly because he’s so stubbornly dedicated to finding a way to preserve Al’s personhood/history when Al has long decided to live his days as if he will ultimately be unpersoned. It doesn’t matter what Alfons says, Roger has decided that this is happening anyway. (Although tbf, if he did find a way to eliminate curses, he probably wouldn’t force Al to take it. So he’s not entirely disrespecting his agency. Neither man is 100% consistent in being other-oriented or self-oriented, which I like, because humans are the same way. And I like my characters especially selfish and messy.)

Where Alfons has to learn to figure out a life that centers him-as-person and not him-as-mirror, Roger has to decide where love/another person fits into a life and self that he thought he had very definitively shaped around himself and his pursuits. (That being said, I don't think he was particularly averse to the idea of it changing since he egged the robin on so much in her quest to prove to him that love is real. He also admits in one of his epilogues that he suppressed a desire for companionship. Iirc, it was because he felt he needed to be strong on his own, but it's been a while, so I could totally be wrong on that one.)

I think it's very cool that the hedonist's life is built around everybody else (I would not call this agape or selfless love, or even pathological people pleasing... just an absence of an idea of what to do with himself) while the doctor is always thinking about his own priorities. A little irony!

I also want to chew a little bit eventually on how they both come onto the robin at the end of other routes and how other characters receive that. Elbert specifies lategame (can’t remember which of his endings) that he doesn’t think Alfons would steal the robin away from him because Alfons is typically someone who gives others what they want, not takes what he wants. Whereas he wants her to stay several steps away from Roger at all times. He knows that Roger won’t fuck with his bodily autonomy like past doctors, but he does NAWT trust him with his girl. Idk if I’d say Roger has the least regard for other members of Crown’s wants vs his own, but he at least presents himself as Mr. Steal Yo Girl in at least Liam and Alfons’s endings (I think both blind love epilogues). I’m still deciding how sincere he was either of those times or if he had some ulterior motive. It’s not that I don’t think he could be a total dick, I’m just not totally convinced he’d fuck over Liam or Alfons that brazenly when he seems to care about them in his own “I will never say it” way. And he must have known that Liam was in earshot, that he’d hear Roger hitting on the robin and her rejecting him without hesitation/reaffirming her love for Liam… Still sitting on the stuff with Alfons because it’s possible he thinks that Alfons is too flawed to be her lover, but… idk, he’s been searching for a way to break the boy’s curse for twenty goddamn years, it feels forced for him to talk about Al so callously. Idk! I could be delusional! But it’s fishy to meeee!1

But yeah. Especially with their shared history, it's hard not to view them as a pair. They’re also a lot of fun together; they had me rooooolling in Harry’s aphrodisiac event. Try to distance yourselves from each other all you want, you are on the same! Bullshit!

I've also noticed that a couple people, myself included, seem to have really strong opposing reactions to the two of them (although Alfons has really grown on me), and I'm always curious what the reason for it is because imo they're two sides of the same coin, two peas in a sleazy pod.

Idk what to make of this, I just wanted to ramble about how the parallels between the two run deeper than surface level and how exciting I find that. I love them. Thanks for reading. Please feel free to add to any of this or refute anything I’ve said, I’m really just thinking out loud. Gotta use the ol’ brain every once in a while to make sure it still runs.

[specialagentartemis]

Re. your post on AI with no sources (which I'm going to reblog; but I wanted to note this outside of the tags): I work in higher ed too, in administration. As it happens, my program is having a meeting next week, required by the office for undergrad education, to talk about "what we're going to do about Grade Inflation". *SCREAMING* I've been in this job for 24 years. I've seen past attempts to deal with grade inflation! I've seen past attempts to deal with honors inflation! They haven't figured out a solution YET. But what's especially NOT a solution is pushing it down on all of the individual depts. Because all you'll get in that case is inconsistent amounts of change (if any), and all that happens then is that those depts that DO try to address the issue find their enrollments plummeting. It absolutely HAS to be an across-the-university push all at the same time, or nothing is going to work. But yeah, sure, we'll sit around a table next week and talk about how we can grade more harshly. An idea that, as things stand, is basically asking the instructors to kill their enrollments and thus kill their student evaluations, which are examined by the administration when it comes time to renew their job appointment. I do NOT know the solution to all of this. Because there's all that on the one hand, and there's the "college as commodity" issue that you mentioned on the other hand. How do we get to a point where we can get the students to focus on the learning opportunity in front of them, rather than on the distant post-graduation job market? I just don't know, because the whole mindset is so foreign to me. And I think for a lot of teachers, too (which I am not), there's this same issue of... we weren't the ones in that mindset when we were IN college, so it's very hard to understand it now. It's not hard to understand the *fear*, or the pressure. It's just hard to understand the not-caring at all. Anyway. Just wanted to say: solidarity. This is such a big problem. AI is exacerbating it, making it worse, but the problem really was already there.

oooof yeah. Good luck and I’m really sorry about that :(

as one of the reblogs of my post said: the solution to this is UBI. Unfortunately, the solution to quite a lot of things is UBI.

Because that’s the problem, right? It’s not so much that AI exists, it’s that it makes it exponentially easier to just give up and fall into the attitude that is already pervasive anyway. I’ve never had to talk about great inflation but ugh yeah. If college is a commodity, and you need a good grades, and if college is a business, you need to keep coming and paying for those good grades… you have to revamp basically the entire economy to get out of the hole that’s been dug, both by us and for us!

Like, what, we need “college does not cost thousands of dollars” AND ALSO “4-year college is not a requirement for getting a ‘respectable’ job where you can support yourself and survive comfortably” AND ALSO “community college gets respect and support” AND ALSO “professors shouldn’t be expected to teach, research, and do administrative work all at once, all the time” AND ALSO “get rid of the publish or perish model for real” AND ALSO “teaching and public outreach are institutionally valued” AND ALSO “college professors actually get taught how to teach, like get taught education theory and pedagogy” AND ALSO “not have students’ housing or scholarship depend on their grades” AND ALSO “not have a grade school culture of teaching to the test and standardized tests that instills in you for your entire childhood that grades are everything” BUT THAT WOULD MEAN “not funding grade schools/high schools based on student test scores, just actually funding them all for real” AND ALSO “hiring more teachers” BUT THAT WOULD MEAN “making teaching at a school a task that isn’t horribly thankless and burns people out real fast” BUT THAT WOULD ALSO MEAN “making school not a miserable place to be a child” WITH A SIDE OF “make sure everyone is teaching phonics again for real so from a young age, students learn how to read well and don’t struggle with reading and writing in a way that encourages them to give up and use ChatGPT” AND ALSO “generally having a culture that values learning and knowledge rather than money”… it is all SO MUCH and it will be hard to do and also expensive so nobody with the power to fix it really wants to try that hard to do so!!

and yeah, I definitely think you’re right that because all the professors and TAs are the people who liked school enough to keep doing it forever it’s just, incredibly hard to grok the students who don’t care. But the mess of a culture we’re in makes it all so hard to challenge because it feels like we need to untangle EVERYTHING to fix ANYTHING.

UBI would be a great start though.

[xuune]

Hii first of all, I FUCKIN LOVE YOUR ART! ITS GORGEOUS AND IM SURE EVERYONE CAN UNDERSTAND YOU REALLY GIVE YOUR SOUL INTO THAT🤧 Your color palette looks so good, What do you pay attention to when painting? (Like when do you think its better to use multiply or something like that and etc.)

first off, I'M HAPPY YOU CAN TELL THAT I PUT MY SOUL INTO MY ART!!! im genuinely in love with drawing and am always finding ways to make creating art enjoyable and impress myself with what i can achieve and learn :D

second, thanks for asking your question!! i dont mind answering it, but my response is quite long. here's my thinking process:

(you specified layer modes like multiply, so im gonna gear my answer towards that a bit) 1. REFERENCE SEARCHING IS KING. color is actually extremely hard for me, so i search around for artworks with palettes i'd like to use and study how an artist uses it. some situations i have a clear idea of what i want, but usually the images in my head are extremely vague, so i borrow palettes from various other artworks that fit the vibe of what i want. an example is this one. my main palette reference were from these artworks. im looking at this artist's use of high saturates and how drawings are overlayed on top of each other. while looking at references, im asking myself how is this artist using warm/cools, where are these warm/cools placed, if their illustration used any form of texturing (like halftones, hatching), how do they use their palette to render form/shape/gradient, when/where do they saturate/desaturate their colors. those questions inform my decisions when using colors too.

2. USING LAYER MODES WHEN NECESSARY. i used to be reliant on multiply for everything, which atp i dont do since i can definitely push colors more first before using layer modes. only when i feel like my current colors are lacking do i start tinkering with tone curves and/or brightness/contrast/hue/saturation/luminosity settings. and if that doesn't work, then i start using layer modes. using layer modes do help with achieving certain effects, color corrections, or when i want to fuck around and find out. i think having a better understanding of what these modes can do makes you more decisive on how you can properly utilize them and to achieve a particular look (like using multiply for a cel shaded style). here's an example:

this leads into my next point:

3. BALANCING OUT VALUES. big thing that makes an illustration hard to read is if values blend together which affects the hues and contrast. i check for what elements need to be distinguished from one another and if it can be read clearly. using layer modes can either help with this or not help at all. it's very dependent on the type of layer mode. here's this example where i applied pin light:

back to #2, there are various instances where i'm using layer modes for quick color corrections and/or to help with readability:

other times, i start off having my entire subject in gray and to figure out main shadow/lights (similar to the multiply cel shaded process i linked ealier). im thinking about what this should look like if i only used 2 value tones:

when in doubt though, i check my artwork in grayscale to ensure values aren't overly blended into each other, especially if i didnt start with grayscale like this one:

painting for me takes into consideration a lot of different aspects. im thinking about how colors should interact, where/when to give contrast, checking/balancing out values, etc, but im also making it a time to study off of how other artists use their colors through the references i collected.

hope this answered your question! lmk if there's more :]

[acupofinkedblood]

Katana x reader [NSFW]

TW: NSFW headcanons

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

• Ah, the ronin of Thieves Den. You really have quiet the fascination with traumatized old man, don’t you? But hey, regardless of that, you know what you are signed up for. Like Hyperlaser, Katana doesn’t really into the concept of dominance or submissive, and he is neither due to that. And don’t even think this man is a bottom, he is a hard top and there is no room for negotiation in this situation

• Like you have expected, sex with Katana is being treated with intimacy and affection. He treasures every moment with you, including this when both of you are at most vulnerable. You are his everything, his home and his beloved. Every touch ghosts against your skin, he will make sure that it will bring you satisfaction. It fits more to the ‘make love’ category than just ‘sex’, if you understand what I mean

• One highlight is that he has to make sure that you can take him first. I’m not even playing, you are aware that this man is 6'8" and is rather ruggedly toned because of constant training as well as fighting, right? Very few mere mortal is able to reach that height of his, and we don’t need to talk about strength because the answer is pretty obvious at this point. Mentally prepared yourself for whatever comes next, that’s all I have to advise you under that circumstance

• Despite his intimidating appearance, you know how gentle this man is around you. Same principle applies when he is making love with you. He won’t be rough, even when you ask him to. Doesn’t matter if you are positive that you can take it or not, Katana is aware of the difference in your strength compared to his, and physique as well. He doesn’t wish to hurt you. But honestly, even when he is being gentle, you are always such a spent mess afterwards

• Your comfort matters a lots to him. He won’t rush you, keep that in mind. Whatever you have in mind, he wants to hear it. You don’t have to feel shy around him in this specific moment. Vocalizing your opinions, he appreciates your truthfulness

• Be ready to be showered with praises because this man will make sure that you are aware of how much you meant to him. He will tell you how well you are doing, how beautiful you are and how much he loves you. Sometimes it’s just so overwhelming at how much he compliments you up and down, he definitely has a way with his words when it comes to you that can fluster you easily

• He doesn’t really have any specific ideas on what he wants while at it, but there is something about your touch that intrigues him. The way your hand gently brushes on his body, tracing his scars with awe, it sends a shiver down to his spine. Don’t be surprised when he suddenly hold your hand and kiss it, he can’t help himself. It reminds him how much you have been able to gain his trust, enough to see him bare like this. Your touch is welcome anywhere

• One note, this man has his own belief. He is outspoken about what he thinks, especially when it involves you. He will even disagree with you for your own sake when he figures out something is wrong. You can’t really argue with him in that aspect, sorry about that sweetheart. If your ideas sound too risky, you know that he won’t agree with it

• That is to say, he’s not the type to take risk. At least, not with you. He values you too much to the point that the thought of you getting hurt because of him makes him uneasy. He prefers to keep things at bay, enough to satisfy the both of you but also enough not to push any of you to discomfort. Like I mentioned earlier, you matter to him a lots

• Once they two have finished, his top priority is to treat you with care. You need not to worry about a single thing with him around, just leave it all to him. Though he can be quite worrisome when seeing you that spent so you gotta reassure him that everything is still fine. On that note, get him to lie down with you and snuggle up against his chest. His body is naturally warm most of the time and it can help you relax quite a lots

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

[milkykittyy]

Enhypen Energy Check

What’s been up with them lately?

9/05/25

*Disclaimer just entertainments purposes. This reading base on their current energy *

Jay

( Page of Swords, Knight of Swords, The Fool, Four of Pentacles)

Jay’s in a restless, curious mood — his mind’s buzzing with ideas, and he’s itching to jump into something new or spontaneous (The Fool). He’s probably bouncing between thoughts, wanting to charge ahead and take risks… but part of him is clinging to his comfort zone or being cautious with his energy or money ,not quite ready to fully let go (Four of Pentacles). Vibe: “I’m ready for an adventure! …Okay, but maybe I should play it safe… or should I just go for it?”

Jake

(The Tower, Four of Swords (rx), Two of Wands (rx), Six of Cups)

Something unexpected or intense has rocked his life recently, and Four of Swords reversed shows he’s trying to rest but maybe struggling to fully relax or switch off. He’s feeling uncertain about what direction to take next, so he’s been leaning on familiar comforts or old friendships (Six of Cups) to ground himself. Vibe: “Trying to chill, figure things out, and maybe heal a little through old comforts.”

Sunghoon

( Eight of Swords (horizontal), Strength (rx), Ace of Cups, Knight of Wands)

Sunghoon’s dealing with some mental or emotional blockages, feeling a bit stuck or overwhelmed. His usual confidence might feel a bit shaky right now ,there’s a sense of needing to regain inner strength. But emotionally, there’s a soft, open side coming through (Ace of Cups), and the Knight of Wands says he’s still got bursts of energy and passion when something excites him —his heart’s opening up — he might be feeling more playful, romantic, or inspired lately, ready to go after what excites him. — even if it’s a little uneven. Vibe: “I’m in my head a lot right now, but I’m pushing through… just trying to figure things out.”

Jungwon

( Temperance, Nine of Swords, King of Cups, Queen of Cups)

He’s working hard to stay balanced and patient, even though he’s been feeling stressed or anxious under the surface. Despite that, he’s holding a lot of emotional maturity and care for others (King + Queen of Cups), probably being the calm and steady one for people around him. Vibe: “Trying to keep calm and steady, but there’s definitely a lot on my mind.”

Sunoo

(Knight of Cups, Hierophant, Queen of Cups, Strength)

Sunoo’s in a soft, romantic, thoughtful mood — maybe thinking about love, creativity, or just wanting to spread good vibes. He’s reflecting on his values or what really matters to him and staying emotionally grounded. There’s also this quiet inner strength showing, like even when things get tough, he’s quietly strong than people may realize. It’s like : “I’m following my heart and keeping it gentle, but don’t underestimate my strength.”

Ni-ki

( Page of Cups, Wheel of Fortune (rx), Lovers, Six of Pentacles)

He’s in a playful, curious mood, but life’s been throwing him a few unexpected twists or delays. Relationships and connections are on his mind (Lovers), and Six of Pentacles shows he’s figuring out how to keep things fair and balanced in his give-and-take with people. Vibe: “Rolling with life’s ups and downs while figuring out my relationships.”

Heeseung

(The Magician, Ten of Cups, Judgment, Ten of Swords (side ways)

He’s in a pretty strong, confident , creative space (Magician), surrounded by good vibes and people who make him happy (Ten of Cups). At the same time, he’s going through some big inner reflection or realizations — maybe thinking about how far he’s come or what’s next. There’s still a bit of mental or emotional exhaustion hanging around (Ten of Swords side ways), but he’s working through it.

It’s like : “I’m doing well, feeling grateful, but man… it’s been a journey.”

[seramilla]

May I propose that for a fun twist, that when Vaggie goes dress shopping with her mamá and hermanas she tries every single thing but the white just gives her the ick reminding her of Heaven a bit too much. So Carmilla picks out something unconventional for her. A red and black wedding dress…one that has a slit going up to her thigh that shows off the black lacey wedding garter.

Before meeting Charlie, the thought of "marriage" and "Vaggie" in the same sentence had never computed in Vaggie's mind. Even when she and Charlie had started dating, she hadn't been sure marriage was in the stars for her. It seemed like something other people did, but not her. But then Charlie had proposed to her, and Vaggie's entire outlook had been turned on its head. Vaggie had of course said yes, and now it's up to her to figure out what that means for herself.

The only problem is, Vaggie has no idea how to plan for a wedding, or what to even wear, for that matter. She's never been to one, and has no idea what the ceremony even entails. Thankfully, she now has a mother who had been married at one point when she was alive, and two older sisters more than willing to provide an...age-appropriate opinion, so that Carmilla doesn't get carried away, as mothers are often wont to do.

Don't get her wrong, Vaggie values Carmilla's opinion...she just thinks Odette and Clara might provide some much-needed...perspective. Carmilla was married a long time ago...and times have changed since then.

Case in point: Carmilla is old-school, and drags Vaggie, who is very nearly on the verge of puking, through a boutique stacked floor to ceiling with the most gaudy white and white-adjacent wedding gowns Vaggie thinks she's ever seen. Carmilla says it's tradition, and just the way things are usually done. White has been the color of choice for brides for generations of women -- mostly for reasons like tradition, symbolism, personal preference, and just carrying down the same outfits from generation to generation.

The only problem is, Vaggie hates white. Hates it. It reminds her of Heaven and empty platitudes and purity culture and asshole nobles who had called her and the other Exorcists "ruffians" for not embracing the typical snow-white and pastel attire adorned by almost everyone else up there.

Vaggie tries on a few white and lighter-colored dresses, because she loves Carmilla, and a part of her really wants Carmilla's approval in this. But after about the fourth or fifth one, she can feel the bile creeping up the back of her throat at the thought of trying on another. When Carmilla tries to shove the next dress into her arms, Vaggie puts her foot down.

"Mama!" Vaggie huffs, pushing the next dress away. "Look...I really appreciate you wanting to help me, but I just don't like any of this stuff. Isn't there something that doesn't make me look so...angelic?"

"Give it up, Mama," Clara says, doing her best not to laugh at Carmilla's "How-Dare-You!" expression. Odette covers her mouth in amusement, also trying not to laugh. The overlord is simply doing her best...but Carmilla can be a little overbearing when it comes to shopping with her daughters. She has very strong opinions. Odette and Clara had tried to warn Vaggie beforehand, but the fallen angel is clearly discovering it now.

Carmilla sighs heavily. "All right. What colors do you want?"

Vaggie twiddles her fingers. It's a little embarrassing...but ever since meeting Charlie, the red aesthetic just does it for her. They both wear it so often at the hotel, that it's just become a part of her outfit rotation. She mentions to Carmilla, "Something red?"

Carmilla, "Hmmms" under her breath, looking around the store until something catches her eye. She then drags Clara and Odette along with her, as if to gauge their opinion on whatever she's found. A few minutes later, her mother and sisters return with a few different pieces. Carmilla likes one in particular more than the others...but again, Odette and Clara override her, saying there's way too many sequins and lace, and it's not flattering on Vaggie at all. They make their own suggestions, taking Vaggie's preferences into consideration.

Ultimately, Vaggie settles on a gorgeous red wedding dress, with black around the bust and inner lining, and a slit going up the side to expose a black lace garter underneath. Vaggie blushes to herself, just knowing instinctively Charlie will love it. Charlie loves red on her. She makes a mental note to help Charlie find a sexy red suit to match.

Odette and Clara go on the hunt for some matching accessories, and Vaggie honestly just wants to hug the two of them. Carmilla means well...and she did manage to find a pair of banger shoes to go along with the dress...but her sisters had really stepped up for her, in more ways than one. All in all, the family works together to make this process as enjoyable as possible, and come away with something that Vaggie, and Charlie, will appreciate for the rest of their lives.

Vaggie decides that even though she isn't much of a shopper, it's nice to be able to spend time together as a family like this. Even with all the little quirks and annoyances that go along with it. She will take the good and the bad. Because it's all part and parcel of finally having what she's always wanted most -- people who love her.

[girlyassumes]

Everyone is You Pushed Out (EIYPO) - Part 3

I'm still so fascinated by Everyone is You Pushed Out. So, I want to talk about it more. It deserves another post.

What do you keep expecting from others?

I keep noticing that this is something I trip up on. When you've had certain expectations of people or of a certain person for a long period of time, it can feel difficult to think that they can change. For example, my boyfriend is known for being really shy. So, every time I see him, I don't expect him to talk my ear off or open up much about things going on in his personal life. I've only ever seen the version of him in my 3D that's more reserved, so that's what I expect every time.

Additionally, with people you don't know, it can either feel really easy or really challenging to change your expectations of them. Let's say you always expect bad things from the US president (not trying to get political, this is just a good example). Then, you'll keep hearing the bad things he's doing every time you turn on the news or talk to friends who feel worried, too. But, of course, this seems like a very big expectation to change, especially since he is someone who's well-known and highly valued by a lot of people, so please don't put yourself down for having negative expectations.

But, considering everyone reflects us in some way, it is very much possible to change our expectations of someone else, which will then change how they are. Having negative expectations or ones that won't benefit our circumstances/situation can make manifesting someone feel more challenging. With that being said, we have to figure out how we can change those expectations when we want to turn a situation around.

How good self concept can help change others

What things do you value in yourself or in others? Do you know? It's really good to have an idea of what qualities you value in yourself and what ones you'd like to see in others. Understanding that and affirming what you want to see is what will help change your own mindset as well as how others act.

This is why one of the methods that's encouraged for romantic SPs is coming up with a list of qualities and traits you want to see in them. Having a well-drawn up, organized list of qualities is what gives us a clear idea of what we're looking for and can make it super easy to manifest someone. This can also be done for anyone in your life. Like, what qualities make someone a good boss? What qualities make someone a good friend?

When you better your self concept, you'll change who you interact with, too. Speaking from my own experience, when I realized I don't need to complain and seek validation from others, I didn't want that quality in my best friend. My (now ex) best friend was that exact type of person because they reflected me. But now they're out of my life because I realized I don't like that quality about myself and stopped giving that person the validation they were expecting from me.

Yes, I know I said in my first post that you don't need good self concept to change others. I still stand by that. It is not needed. But, it can help when you do. Having a clearer idea of what you value and what you love about yourself can create better expectations of and experiences with others.

Focus on having good expectations, not negative ones

Going back to what I said in my last section, keep the good qualities in mind, not the bad ones. I'll give an example. After dealing with some bad past relationships with men, you might expect that "all (or most) men are bad." You'll hear a lot of people say it, too. Then, whenever a new crush comes into your life, there will be at least one bad quality in him that creates a poor relationship or makes you lose romantic feelings for him.

This is when you should view your life as if it's an algorithm (because it pretty much is). If you perceive yourself as someone who's single and thinks badly of men, then you will keep having undesirable men flirt with you and keep hearing other single women talk about how bad men are. It's like when you're scrolling through TikTok and "like" the videos of women ranting about their bad dates with men. TikTok processes that this is the type of content you enjoy watching and will keep showing you more videos of women talking about their horrible dates. Life itself works the very same way.

Imagine your subconscious as TikTok or YouTube. What you like and what you feed it (what you keep watching and favoriting/liking) is what it'll keep producing into your reality. You see where I'm coming from?