#realized i made a grammatical mistake in the tags

[gyuswhore]

How to Win Hearts for Dummies (the answer is lattes and banana bread)

Idol!mingyu x makeup-artist!reader

genre: fluff, angst, one sided pining

warnings: slow burn, swearing, shitty bosses, some descriptions of anxiety and breakdowns, one sided pining, reader has issues opening up (lmk if there's anything else)

13.4k words (im sorry)

plot: This apprenticeship was taking a toll on your self control in the worst possible way. Walking in 8 months ago, a resignation from your corporate job and a dream in your pocket, you made an oath to stay focused on the goal at hand and to enjoy what you did for a living for once; makeup. Except, your still stuck as an apprentice with a mentor that has no inclination for your growth.

And you’re a little bit in love with your client.

masterlist

(A/N): repost bc Tumblr wouldn’t show it in the tags!!! Thank you for clicking on this clonking my pants as I hit post ! I started working on this at the beginning of exam season and I’m posting it the night before my last exam 🥲 what a full circle moment. Also pls excuse any inconsistencies or grammatical errors, my beta reader, unlike me, actually cares ab her grades and is in the beginning of exam season and therefore will not be able to read through this monstrosity for a while lmao. Enjoy hehe

Edit: I’ve just realised how many mistakes and grammatical errors I’ve made throughout the fic, serves me right for proofreading at 3 AM after a stats exam. I’ll try to fix them all asap!!! 

The camera goes off again with a distinct click. And again. And again. And again.

The camera had gone off innumerable times since Mingyu walked out in another themed ensemble, and you were there, watching, through all of it.

You watched as he kept switching positions, rotating his body and his head. Morphing his features into more variations of dazed and serious than you thought could ever exist.

Standing there, at the portable table behind the main setup, attempting to clean a lip brush that would be needed soon when the inevitable call for-

“Makeup over here! We’re taking 5”

You note your sluggish pace as you snap out of your daze and scrubbing harder with the removal cloth. Snapping your head down, hoping nobody noticed your incessant heart eyes, you realize you were in trouble now.

‘Y/n, you’ve been cleaning that brush since I left 10 minutes ago!’ The senior makeup artist snapped.

You finish up the brush in hand and quickly hand her what she needs, not before rummaging for the tiny pot of lip product you absent-mindedly packed away.

‘Sorry, really sorry’ you choke out before she leaves in her badly concealed irritated expression. You see her make a beeline for a waiting Mingyu, who adorably squats for the woman so she has better access.

This apprenticeship was taking a toll on your self control in the worst possible way. Walking in 8 months ago, a resignation from your corporate job and a dream in your pocket, you made an oath to stay focused on the goal at hand and to enjoy what you did for a living for once; makeup. Except, your still stuck as an apprentice with a mentor that has no inclination for your growth.

And you’re a little bit in love with your client.

It's not that you were overage (your mother begs to differ), but considering you were on your second big girl job and still no sign of a potential lover, the prospect was starting to weigh on your head. The first rattling experience was when one of your closest friends announced her engagement, your thoughts still stuck in a 19 year old you considered she was too young. She was not, in fact, 19, or too young, but a perfectly acceptable age to consider marriage with someone she loved, you had soon realized. You were never one for the dating scene, but you were always one to don your Dr. Love labcoat whenever an emotionally bruised friend would come seeking help. You were good at advice, but awfully bad at applying it yourself.

Coming into this job, surrounded by a plethora of beautiful people, your heart would be of stone if it weren’t to waver.

The gong of unattainability had struck the second you laid eyes on Mingyu, laughing at something Hoshi had shown him on the phone. There he was, hair and makeup-less, looking like he had just rolled out of bed (which he had), and beautiful as ever. Beginning this new chapter with a bang, only problem was that it turned into an 8 month shoot out. Having encountered a number of gorgeous people, you’d learned to appreciate their genetic lottery pull and move on. But never had a single look left you as breathless and unbeared as that one, fateful look at Mingyu. One of the team members was busy assuring you not to worry too much about the pandemonium in the dressing room, that everyone would handle it and you were only asked to observe and help with smaller things as instructed; for now. You weren’t listening too hard though.

You were now adjusted to the chaos that comeback season and 13 men plus staff in a microscopic dressing room brought about. But you will never forget how in the midst of your first rain of hell, Mingyu had asked you to pass his phone.

‘Please?’ He had said, and you slammed your hand with a force of a woman infatuated on the table behind you and (literally) breathed out the first thing you had ever said to him.

‘Here’

He smiled and gave you a quick ‘thanks’.

There was no coming back after he flashed you those irresistible canines, and to this day, you wonder what nation you saved in a previous life to be able to have him know your name, hear it roll off his tongue in his pretty voice as he asks you to fix his smudged eyeliner.

You sigh defeatedly before your mentor slash irritated makeup artist shoves her load back in your hands and instructs you to come inside to pack up. It’s become routine for you now, as you begin to pack up the bigger palettes and tools, handing a ready-to-go-home Junhui the pack of makeup wipes he asked for, zipping up bags and closing tubs of outfits. It's an organized chaos but one everybody has grown to work around.

Mingyu is done before you, as he removes his jewelry and begins to shrug off his jacket. You scramble to find the clothes he came in and his coat, pointedly ignoring the familiar scent of wood. He thanks you and shucks off the remainder of his clothing, he might be used to stripping in front of professional staff, but you look away regardless for your own sanity.

Helping the last stylists hang the final jacket, you grab your bag and get ready to leave in your own car. Mingyu has left, not before throwing a “you did well, thank you!” over his shoulder at the remaining people in the room and leaving for the honking car outside.

***

Your mashing bananas in a bowl at 12 AM when you start thinking. Impulsive baking sessions had become a norm since you started working with Seventeen, needing to keep yourself occupied to stop spiraling. Mingyu was a recurring topic (surprise surprise), but one that quickly faded when you begin to think about what the future holds for you. You start mashing the banana harder. You consider the idea that you can’t complain, being in a position some of the most well seasoned pros had difficulty reaching. Being a single young woman and being allowed so close to some of the most unattainable men was seen as near impossible. You’d like to think it was your skill that got you here but can never seem to fully rule out a processing error.

It’s hard, being stuck in the same place. Your apprenticeship should have ended 2 months ago, but even if it had, you’d still be doing the same thing. The senior artist trusts no-one but a select few to work on the boys for photoshoots, events, music videos. People like you are left to sanitize sponges and clean the fallout.

You crack an egg on the counter and it splits open entirely, falling on the floor, yolk and all. Your inability to grow stays within the idea that you can’t really do your artistry like you want.

And how you never learn to crack your eggs on the bowl.

***

Showing up on the Going Seventeen set, you rush to the dressing room way earlier than you should. Being completely honest, you’re really only rushing because you want to maneuvere yourself to do Mingyu’s makeup before somebody else snags him. This was one of the very few engagements where you were occasionally allowed to take charge on makeup. Not that it was required for the show much at all; intensity and occasion wise. Your rare (possible) moment to (maybe) come into Mingyu’s organic notice was an opportunity never to be dropped by you.

You help setting up everything on the counters as the boys begin to (loudly) file in the rooms. You see Mingyu walk in and move to ask him to sit down once he’s done discarding his coat. He was first in line and you ‘happened’ to be the first one ready to begin working.

‘Is the eye makeup heavy? I just got a sty removed and I don’t know if I should be putting anything on at all.’ He asks as he sits down and you ready your damp sponge.

‘Not really, just smoothing things out. It should be fine.’ you say as you begin to press the compact on his cheek.

Your not really sure why, because you’ve never been able to muster anything above brief replies when in contact with him, but something in you pushes you to keep talking.

‘I’m surprised they even asked for us, they rarely ever do’ you continue, heart pounding so hard you’re afraid he might hear it.

He breathes out a laugh ‘Yeah. They even started advertising the show on youtube and subway stations and stuff, I didn’t know until I saw someone talk about it online’

You smile at his response ‘Well, all of you work so hard, it's about time they pull this to a high scale production’

‘It's never really work if your having fun, we try to be ourselves on here’ He replies, still smiling slightly.

You’re damn near close to collapsing on the floor at this point. This is the longest conversation you’ve ever had with him. You opt to smile in response as you start to concentrate on his eyebrows. The rest of his face is done far too soon as you zone out and do what you do best.

‘All done’ you announce as you pull away from his lips, trying not to have yoour gaze linger.

“Y/n! Can you start on Vernon if you're done?’, another artist calls from behind.

‘Yeah, he can come up!’ you reply as Mingyu (regretfully) walks towards hair.

Just because you sew your mouth shut with Mingyu doesn’t mean it applies for the rest of them, you’re quite friendly with all of them and Vernon does well to remind you as he sits down and quips a ‘hey bestieee’ in an elongated greeting.

You audibly laugh ‘That’s another word I’ll be hearing for the next month’

‘Regretfully so’ He feigns sympathy.

‘Be quiet and look up’ you say with a fond smile before you get started on him.

***

You sit on the floor in front of your television, trail mix on the coffee table as the movie plays as background noise for your thoughts - again.

There’s a smile on your face, but you dont notice as you think about the small talk you made with Mingyu today, wondering if it could become a regular occurrence if you learned to keep your heart and mind in check.  

You were never one to stand up and take effort to do what was right for you, which is why you were talked into choosing Business Administration by your friend in highschool, who you never speak to now because she decided to ditch you for another group who were more inclined to shuttle themselves to liver failure by partying every last weekend in your entire college career. You were talked into applying to corporate jobs by your counsellors as you started looking for make-up courses, needing to abandon your dream for the second time when you landed a decent entry level desk job. It took years before you decided to choose yourself for once and made the big leap after multiple courses you had took on the side. Life was starting to look bright after getting hired here, but you’re not sure if you overrode a high or if you went back to your old zipped mouth state after you settled in. Never sure if you expected too much or if things really were as stagnant as they felt.

***

Overmanifestation can be a thing. You're not really sure how it works but you’re reaping what you’ve sowed right about now.

You’re currently standing in an offside corridor in a hotel lobby, clad in a pretty white floral dress, and a nervous, fidgety Mingyu standing in front of you.

'I know I'm asking you to do something difficult and I know it seems pointless because I'm not doing anything wrong either that you have to lie about it'

This was supposed to be a staycation with your friends for you to relax and get your mind off things. Your ticket to relaxation has become a nightmare.

'And I understand I'm being super unreasonable but I'm really trying to keep it on the down-low as we get to know each other'

You were waiting with your friends on the couches positively stuffing your faces with the complimentary chocolate bowl placed on the coffee table as a couple other friends checked you guys into your rooms. You were laughing and talking with your group, carefree and ready to have a week of well deserved rest.

That was the plan anyway. Until you see someone across the lobby, also in line at check in. He had an unmistakable toothy smile,and was hand in hand with a concealed brunette.

Your smile abruptly falls in disbelief as you feel your world halt around you.

The same hands come up to brush the hair out of the woman's face to place a kiss on her temple, smiling wide.

The nauseating feeling of ice going down your spine is becoming more and more apparent. You attempt to swallow the lump in your throat but it's like trying to swallow a brick. You lick your lips and attempt to look away but your eyes keep feeding on the picture you painted yourself in your worst nightmares. Realizing you're on the brink of possible hyperventilation, your friend drops her head and asks you if you're okay. You look up at her, not knowing what to say as you realize that nodding furiously will convince her.

Mingyu has a girlfriend.

Of course he would. What were you thinking? This man is one of the most eligible bachelors in the country, why on earth would he be single? You’re unhinged, you decide, for thinking you may have a chance, when the woman turns around and you see her in full. She’s gorgeous.

A part of you still wants to believe that you're officially past the point of sanity and that you've begun to see Mingyu in every tall man. The universe, however, is cruel. He pushes his head up and in your general direction, and locks eyes with you in unmistakable recognition.

He stops smiling.

So here you are listening to Mingyu asking you to keep this a secret from the company, to forget the woman waiting for him in the lobby.

You can only nod in slight motions as he goes on his rant to justify his oath to secrecy, managing a tight lipped smile as you miraculously find your voice, hoarse as it may be.

'Don't worry about it, I understand' - ouch - 'it's none of my business anyway. I'll keep my lips sealed, I promise'

'Thank you, thank you, thank you I appreciate it so much, you don't even know. I'll repay you soon I promise'

'No, please, it's not-'

'No, Y/n I will. You're being really good to me right now and I'm so grateful. I'm sorry for putting you through this while you're off from work and with friends. It's worth to me that your listening and understanding'

You're tired. You want nothing but for him to stop talking. So you smile again and shake your head.

'I'm sure your friends are waiting, I won't keep you. I'll see you soon though!'

And with that he leaves. Back to the lobby where you see him take the woman by hand once again. You watch again as they walk to the elevators, stepping in and disappearing when the doors close. You watch the floor number rise.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5…

You walk back to your laughing friends before you can see where they got off.

***

Retiring to your shared hotel room with Chaeyoung, you fall back first into the crisp sheets and mattress.

'Why're you so depressed dude, did Mingyu say something to you?' She asks, a slight line forming between her brows.

'I'm fine, I've been up since 5 today it's just fatigue hitting me right now' you reassure, like always. 'I might not go to dinner with you guys, might end up with my face in the soup at some point'

Chaeyoung hums. ‘Take the night off so you can gear up for the rest of the week. I'm letting you off for now but I expect full attendance for eveything else we do', finishing with a mocking stern look.

'Yes ma'am' you feign salute from the bed, mimicking her stern tone.

You've known Chaeyoung for quite a while now, meeting her in your last year of uni. Trusting her as you do, you were never fully able to fess up about your feelings for Mingyu. Fear of judgment wasn't the problem, but more so the strange feeling of shame that overcomes you when you think about talking about it with other people. It's quite beyond you, why you act this way. You loved your friends and you knew they would support you with everything, they'd proved it when you'd made one of the most difficult decisions of your life while leaving your job. But the idea of having the audacity to love someone who could never do the same seemed like a feat of embarrassment.

Who are you, y/n? Who are you to have foolish dreams of a girl in love? With someone clearly fit for all things greater than you?

Maybe this was a good thing, you thought, the weird feeling in your stomach returning. Maybe this was the universe telling you to give up and move on, a kind of rejection that keeps your dignity. This was nothing but a reality check, a sign from whatever wants best for you, to bring your attention back to what brought you to Mingyu in the first place.

***

You didn’t see Mingyu for the rest of the trip, which you were grateful for not knowing how you’d react if you had to see him so soon after, that.

Back massaged and head clearer than it had been for weeks, you feel more in control of your feelings and thoughts regarding your life. You hope the conversation with Mingyu was the last stressful thing you’d encounter for a while.

It’s almost comeback season, you realise as you see the new concept photos while scrolling on your couch at home. This meant insanely early mornings for weeks on end, but you had to push through for your own sake. You’d come out of multiple comebacks needing a brace for a month but you wouldn’t trade it for the world. Never realising the true meaning of learning through experience, you were enlightened as you entered this new, very hands on field. The concept looked interesting, hoping the scraps of makeup you’d be allowed to do would be fun for you.

That ended up being true when you were, for the first time, asked to do Hoshi’s full makeup for their first comeback broadcast.

Your stumped silence was short lived as you hastily oblige and get the chair ready for him. You’d looked at the demo sheets and face charts too much for someone who wasn’t actually going to be asked to do much, but you see it pay off as you finish his eyes and get started on the rest of his face. It was easy for you to zone out as Soonyoung had passed out not even 5 minutes in, having someone hold his face as you worked.

You felt your chest swell with an indesipherable feeling as you watched him get up with your mastery on his face; pride, was it? You were getting emotional for no reason. Your attention, however, is moved sharply when you hear someone tell Mingyu it was his turn, finding him plopped on your chair staring straight into nothingness as he’d just been rudely awoken from his nap. He doesn’t realise it’s you for a solid minute as he tried to remember his own name.

‘Oh, hello’ he says, sort of confused. ‘Sorry, just give me minute’, he mumbles as he rubs his eyes.

He stretches back onto his seat signalling he’s ready for you to get started. You trying not to feel too much in your stomach as you begin.

You’re powdering his forehead when he says “I know I already said this but I really appreciate what you’re doing”

You know he’s talking about the conversation at the hotel, you were hoping you could avoid it.

“I told you not to worry about it, honest.” You reply, and somehow manage to choke out “It makes me happy that you’re happy”

You can see him trying to fight a smile, “Thank you for saying that”.

You wanted to stab someone. But you opt for gently brushing a base colour across his eyes.

“Do any of us know her, by any chance?” You ask cautiously.

“I dont think so. We met through mutual friends at a Christmas dinner, we didn’t start talking till she had to bring me a bunch of papers I’d left at my mom’s that day.” his face depicts someone reminiscing a fond memory.

It was cute, how it seemed like fate was trying to bring them together. It would've been cuter if you weren’t in a one sided pining with one of the two lovers.

“Well, I hope it works out for the both of you”

No you don’t.

“I hope so too”

You don’t hope that at all.

You felt guilty, feeling all of this. Hated that this was your first response to him wanting to be happy. Never would you have imagined stooping this low, hoping his happiness doesn’t work out for your sake. You’d like to owe it this being your first real infatuation, but you can’t help but wonder if this was really what you thought.

You decided to focus on the good news for today, that you’re finally allowed to do your actual job. You can only hope this wasn’t a temporary advancement, allowing time to tell.

Things remained the same the following day, much to your absolute elation. You were done doing 4 people’s makeup and was just winding down to take a break, quite satisfied with yourself. You observed as the rest of the boys got their hair done and run around, half in their outfits. You stifle a snort as you watch Jeonghan hide Minghao’s socks in his pockets as the boy tried to find them to put his shoes on, the former continuing to sip on his coffee seemingly unaware.

“Y/n, have you seen my socks? The green ones with the leaves on it?” Hao inevitable asks you.

You’re forced to feign confusion when Jeonghan pokes his head behind him signalling you to keep up the charade. He continues to look and you’re just about to have mercy on the poor boy before a to-go cup of coffee is shoved in front of your face.

You look up at the person and it’s Mingyu extending his arm at you expectantly.

“Oh, I didn’t order anything” you start, thinking you’re clearing up a confusion.

“I know you didn’t, got one for you anyway.”

There’s a record screech in your brain as you absorb his words.

“Think of it as me trying to repay the favour”

Oh. I see.

You’re a little embarrassed thinking he’d get one for you in that way, not when he had someone waiting on him. You accept the cup and mumble a thank you as he unexpectedly plants himself on the couch next to you.

“I saw you drinking lattes a lot of the times, so I just got you that. Hope that’s okay”.

Your silent for a moment before replying “Yes!” a little bit too loudly, eyes widening a little realisng your lack of volume control.

He knows your coffee order.

“Yes,” you say again in a normal tone and a slight laugh to cover up your inability to read the room, “They’re my favourite actually”

Kim Mingyu knows you like latte’s. This wasn’t good for your delusional brain.

Your conversation is cut short when the boys are called for roll call before they can prepare for the actual stage. You watch him get up and leave to file into the overstuffed elevators, not before he throws you the most adorable wave you’ve ever seen. You can’t hold back your smile as you wave back and look down at the drink he got you before taking a sip.

***

As it turns out, you did makeup for the rest of their comeback season, and Mingyu, without fail, got you an iced latte every single day before leaving to go on stage.

You tried to get him to stop, but he was rooted in his position and you didn’t have it in you to say no to his pleading eyes. It was a re-charge for you, when you’d seen him break into a happy smile, prominent canines that you’d grown to adore. He’d done more than enough to ‘repay’ you for swearing to secrecy, and you felt like you too, should  should repay him the balance.

So here you were, making banana bread in your kitchen again, careful to remember to crack your eggs on the rim of your mixing bowl instead of slamming them on the counter. You’re stirring the flour in when a classified devious thought occurs to you.

These past two weeks were pivotal for both you and Mingyu, daily coffee’s meant daily conversations, which meant getting to know one another more. You’d exchanged phone numbers in the midst of all of this, to which ensued the agenda of staying up till midnight talking to each other about the meaning of life.

Setting down the whisk, you pick up your phone and sent the text before you chickened out.

[You]: I have a surprise for you.

[You]: You wanna come over? It’s better enjoyed fresh lol

[Mingyu]: Ma’am? 👁👁

[Mingyu]: That sounds a whole lot like a booty call

[You]: *attachment*

[Mingyu]: IS THAT CAKE??

[Mingyu]: omw 😮‍💨

You send the location and set your phone down, a jittery feeling going through your entire body. There’s a spring in your step as you slide the loaf into the oven and set a timer. You turn around your kitchen island and register the pigsty that is your apartment. The girls were over the night before and you had done nothing to enlighten the aftermath, pillows strewn across the entire living room and snack wrappers in places you’re not sure how they landed.

By the time you’re done and spritzed the place with some of your nicer perfumes, your taking the loaf out of the oven and on a rack to cool.

Ever the punctual man, you hear the doorbell ring just as your taking your oven mitts off.

Hoping you’ve done enough to your apartment to save yourself from embarrassment, you collect yourself and open the door for him through your ringcam. He’s barely through when your rushing towards your doorway.

“Hi!”

“Hey,” he grunts as he tries to slip off his shoes.

“‘aight, where’s my cake?” he demands once he’s done giving you a quick hug.

You roll your eyes and usher him to the kitchen, “First of all, appreciate how excited you are to see me, and second, its banana bread not cake, sorry to burst your bubble”

He responds to your grumbling with an “Oh come on, you can't put freshly baked goods on the agenda and expect me to pay particular attention to anything else”.

He has his trademarked grin and cheesy stare out on display like its nobody’s business, you want to slap it off of him in the most loving way possible, but you settle with a tiny “shut up”.

“I brought warm coffee this time, thought it’d go better” He sets the to-go carrier on the kitchen counter, following you to where you were attempting to slice the still hot banana bread on a tray.

“Oh, that was a good idea” you say.

“Where’re your plates and forks?” he asks, pulling out the drawers and cabinets you signal to.

It all felt too domestic for your weak heart to handle. Not to say it didn’t warm you to the core how comfortable he felt in your space, you did, more than you’d care to admit. But he needed to tone it down before you required an organ transplant.

You were seated on the floor, butts parked on floor cushions, backs against the couch. The coffee table held all of your goods while you both argued on which movie to watch.

“I can’t believe you haven’t watched any of the Harry Potter movies! No, we’re watching philosopher’s stone, I don’t care!” You shout in disbelief, already typing it into the search bar on the TV.

“Philly-philo- bro I can’t even pronounce it why would I watch that?!” He yells back, snatching the remote from you.

You’re both a giggling, screaming mess on the floor as you keep trying to steal the remote from each other, not stopping until one of you bumps into the table and you almost spill hot coffee all over yourselves.

You decide to call a truce and pick another movie entirely.

Just as you’re pressing play, Mingyu takes a bite of the still (surprisingly) warm banana bread and you watch as his eyes roll to the back of his head.

“This is so good” He says, his faced furrowed as he goes in for another bite. “Did you lace this with something, why is this so good?”

You’re biting back a snarky remark but you let it rip anyway; “It’s cuz these pretty hands made it”

You splay your hands out in front of your face, like your showing him your rings, fingers wiggling and a cheeky smile on your face.

He looks unimpressed as he scoffs. He swallows before saying: “At least you didn’t call the secret ingredient love or something”

“Excuse you, I’m pretty sure I heard you say that in some Gose episode” You remark.

He turns to you, all smug: “So your saying you watch Gose? Like, regularly?”

You immediately turn away from his taunting smirk, “Sometimes, if it shows up on my home page”

You take a sip of your latte before he asks you another sweat producing question.

“Oh, but you pay attention to me the most don’t you? Don’t you?”

He’s poking fun at you, you know that. But a paranoid part of you can’t help but think he’s onto you and your feelings.

So you say something maybe a little bit below the belt.

“You sure have a knack for seeking validation from the world when you have a partner already giving that to you”

The words tumble out of your mouth before you know it. In your defence, you're doing this for a greater cause, but it's still a relief when you see him comically gasp, hand to his diaphragm.

“Just because your alone in life, doesn’t mean you need to be salty about other people receiving actual love” He spits back.

Your sputtering trying to think of a response. Deserved.

He grabs a slice of the bread and shoves into your mouth to shut you up once and for all. You’re left chewing the mouthful and staring at him in shock.

He giggles and takes a sip of coffee, satisfied with himself. When he sets it down he opens his mouth to speak. Closes it again, like he re-evaluating, and finally decides to say something. He’s serious now.

“Ji Eun and I, decided it wasn’t gonna work out between us”.

Oh.

“Oh.”

He blows a raspberry and lets out a meek laugh.

“Yeah, oh. It’s whatever, it wasn’t meant to work out. Better sooner than later.”

You’re trying to find the words to reply or comfort him.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You ask him, being careful to not lace your voice with pity, but more neutral and open. “You don’t have to, obviously, but it might be better to talk about what’s bothering you”

He pauses for a moment before starting.

“She wasn’t sitting very well with the idea that she had to share me. Like at all. She wouldn’t say it but she’d get mildly infuriated when I’d blow the fans a kiss or something, or interacted with the staff too much. I was getting home quite late certain days during comeback season and I’d find her outside the dorm at like 11 PM. It was embarrassing when all of the other members would see her there, obviously upset and basically yelling at me for, for - for literally just doing my job.I guess all the smaller things just started piling and she couldn’t take it. I tried so hard to make sure she felt wanted and secure in the relationship but nothing felt like it was ever enough. She was evasive or confrontational all at the wrong times and it came to a point- its a horrible thought to have in a relationship - but I was terrified she’d do something rash and I’d wake up to my face on articles for some reason - again”

You recollected the past couple years when Mingyu was thrown around in the media for a new accusation seemingly everyday. You weren’t involved with anything regarding the industry back then, but you’d heard enough news to be aware of what was happening.

Your heart swelled with sadness as you heard him talk, he sounded like he was trying- trying hard to be good enough. All for a person who seemed to have their priorities set somewhere else.

“She was amazing; kind and happy and confident. She treated my parents with respect, she was best friends with my sister. I know we only lasted like 3 months but at some point I really considered that she could be the one. But then the problems started and I realized she was only becoming an added factor to stress and anxiety for me more than anything else.

“I liked her because she was so family oriented, and I thought that was what would fit me because I’m like that too. But, I guess I’m just a different kind of oriented? I don’t know. I have a job that’s both interpersonal and unpredictable. There’s days where I don’t wanna get up and do work but I still love it nonetheless. I guess she just expected me to have a predictable, stable 9 to 5. Home in time for dinner, not requiring interaction with too many people; basically everything I can’t be.”

He’s silent for a moment.

You start talking after a couple beats.

“I really hope you aren’t taking this like it’s your fault. She made a choice to put up with your work, knowing how it would be for the both you. You tried your best but she made you feel like your best wasn’t good enough. I dunno about you, but that sounds like a really problematic conclusion. If she truly cared for you and what you love, she would never have been this unsupportive or not understanding”.

He’s listening to you, his expression is blank but you can tell he’s absorbing your words.

“I’d like to think I had realized that. But being completely honest, I’m not really sure when my thoughts go back to me thinking I’m the problem all the time.”

He manages a smile, a wide one, as he looks up to make eye contact with you; “But I know it’ll take me some time to really start believing that it’s not entirely my fault. We just weren’t compatible, and that’s fine. We left on good terms, and I’m happy about that.”

You smile with him as he finishes, but your a little confused when he starts sliding closer and down the cushions.

He sets his head on your shoulder.

You may have shortcircuited right then and there.

“Is this okay?” he asks you quietly, attention finally diverted to the half played movie.

You realise he asked you a question and you have to answer.

“Yeah, this is fine” You breathe out, somehow, by the graces of God himself.

No, you weren’t fine at all. You felt like the universe had flipped a faulty switch, mixed up the scripts, lost the plot, something. But as you get used to the weight of Mingyu’s head on your shoulder, you pray it won’t come back to haunt you in another chapter.

***

Your routine became inverted in the sense that, what you once had to plan out so intricately, is unfolding with no effort from you at all.

You find that Mingyu waits for you to be done with somebody else so you can do his makeup, instead of sitting on another free chair. He’d come to you specifically to touch up his makeup instead of going to an artist he saw closer to him. He never forgot to get you a coffee whenever it was that he saw you.

Mingyu hadn’t slept over that night, instead leaving in his car despite the 1 AM drizzle and your insistence for him to stay until the pour recedes.

Maybe it was better for you that he hadn’t stayed that night. Something about how you grew so close ‘organically’ made you feel like this wasn’t all in your head, that he’s choosing to be your friend.

You’re handing him his clothes as he begins to change, using the excuse to whisper to him;

“I was gonna try a new brownie recipe tonight, if you’re free you can come over?”

“I think I have somewhere to be after this but I’m free after, How’s 6?”

So there you are, back in your kitchen folding chocolate chunks into your brownie batter while waiting for Mingyu to get here.

Your phone dings from the island and you check to see a message from Mingyu sending you what looked like a grocery list; pasta, oregano, garlic…

[Mingyu]: Tell me what you don’t have from this

[Mingyu]: I’m at the store rn hurry up

You send him a list of what you don’t have, realising he intended to have dinner with you too.

[Mingyu]: k thanks

[Mingyu]: be there in like an hour

There’s a warm feeling that’s swelling in your chest, that makes you wanna punch a wall because your so happy. You choose self control, mostly because this apartment is on a lease but also you’d probably break your knuckles trying to punch anything harder than a foam mat.

By the time Mingyu’s here, the brownies are in the oven and you’re almost done with the icing. He unpacks the groceries (and the warm lattes) he bought while you finish up, confirming that he was trying a new pasta recipe tonight. Setting the brownies and coffee down on your usual coffee table, you decide wait a couple hours before starting on making dinner, instead choosing to hear him ramble about an idol he met at an award show.

“So, we start talking before we’re ready to go up- you weren’t there you were working on wonwoo’s makeup- and he starts complimenting me and so obviously I start complimenting him back”

He’s waving his arms around, and setting positions with coasters on the table trying to explain the setting.

“He asks me if I have a sister and I’m like… yes? Which I should’ve realised where this was going because he then” - he pauses to take a deep breath - “this absolute asshat decides it’d be funny to ask me for her number because apparently ‘if you’re this hot, I’m sure any sibling you have is too’ BRO, WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SAY THAT - how are laughing at this?!”

You calm yourself down for a second to clarify, “NO! It’s just hilarious how he thought that was okay to say”

You’re still still giggling in shock when Mingyu calms down, now also laughing incredulously.

“But actually though, please tell me you smacked him” you manage.

“I would have,” he grumbles “I got called to fix my hair cuz I ruined it or something”.

“Oh well, now you know who to avoid next time,” you say as you guide a bite of brownie into his mouth, “Forget about it now, eat sugar, it’ll help”

He chews a bit before swallowing, all while you’re watching him with an endeared smile on your face.

“Y’know, I really thought you didn’t like me when you first joined the team”

You pause mid sip of your coffee, brows furrowed, “What do you mean?”

“You never really talked me, did you? You were friendly with the rest of them but it just seemed like you never wanted to enter a room if you saw me there”

You’re looking at him in utter shock, this man was mistaking your avoidant (yet also pushy) teenage crush behaviour for dislike.

He’s looking at you expectantly, a little pout on his face.

“I never disliked you, why would you think that? I promise everything was a coincidence, it was nothing like that”

“Don’t get so defensive, kinda obvious you like me now if not before” He laughs at your panicked expression.

He meant platonic like.

“I’m sorry I made you feel like that though, I’ve been told I have a pretty serious resting bitch face, it’s gotten me in trouble before” she smile sheepishly.

“It’s fine, you made up for it with that first banana bread” He says before taking another bite of brownie, “Could use more chocolate chunks”

You snort before pushing him with a sock clad foot, “Appreciate me even giving them to you” 

You fall back to the adjacent sofa.

It’s quiet for a moment. But you feel like something’s shifted in the air.

You watch as he brings his hand to the same foot, holding onto your ankles. He’s caressing the exposed skin with his fingers, moving them back and forth. His eyes are glued to yours, looking like he’s in a trance. You’re not sure how to register this new change in mood, suddenly feeling like you need to turn the aircon on during the bleak Seoul winter. Just as you're hoping you don’t start sweating, you feel his vice grip on your ankle pull your leg over with a sharp tug. You scream as you lose support of the sofa and fall back.

You sit up in shock to find him leaning with his elbows on the floor, cackling like madman.

“Mingyu, what the fuck?”

“You-” He stops to laugh again, “You should’ve seen your face, PLEASE, it was hilarious”.

You huff before getting up shoving his shoulder with your foot again, “You’ve been playing guest a little too long, maybe it’s time you get started on that pasta”

“Will I be blessed enough to be receiving her highness’s help?” He asks.

He looks like a dream, clad in his T-shirt because he claims he doesn’t get cold. Hands behind him on the floor to give him support as he stares up at you, smiling wide. He’s looking at you with eyes full of stars and glitter.

You muster up the courage to give him a nasty glare, to which he huffs at and gets up, “Such a meanie”.

It’s hard to conceal your smile as his back his turned, sachaying towards the kitchen. You want to slap him and kiss him at the same time.

Your washing veggies in the sink when you turn around catch sight of his back as he stood at the kitchen island, sorting the rest of the ingredients. You get the same overwhelming feeling in your chest again, assuming you’re deluding yourself into thinking this is what life could be like with him. In less than 3 seconds, you’ve conjured a timeline of domestic routines, to wind down with him like this every evening.

You’re still lost in thought, still incessantly staring when he turns around and catches you in the act. He does the rude thing and snaps his fingers in front of your face to pull you out of your thoughts, “You okay?”

“Yeah” You say trying to gloss it over while busying yourself trying to find your cutting board.

“Are you sure? Do you wanna sit down at the island and watch me instead. You don’t have to help -”

“Pick a knife, and shut up dingus, it’s fine”

Once your both done eating and cleaning up, Mingyu hugs you goodbye, not before asking if you’d be free for lunch next week before he got busy the following month. You quickly agree, setting a date and time, bidding your (reluctant) farewells.

***

Once back in your apartment you realize how you can’t clean up to distract yourself because Mingyu took it upon himself to clear the space with you before he left. You sigh loudly and retire into your bedroom where you don’t have to think about how empty your living room is.

Changing into your pajamas and putting a headband on, you don’t even feel like turning your music on to do your night routine. You double cleanse, tone, serum, acid and moisturise your face with added purposefulness, taking note of the crevices of your nose and the neglected bottom of your chin. Taking extra time to make sure all of the foam is out of your skin before drying your face with a tissue.

You look at your fed skin in the mirror, and feel a weird surge of tears well in your eyes. Before they can fall you slam your bathroom cabinet to busy yourself to find your melatonin gummies, shoving them in your mouth before switching off the bathroom light and retiring to your bedroom.

Slipping the headband off and sliding into bed, you’re still chewing your gummies to a paste in your mouth. Trying not to notice how heavy you’re breathing you try to find your white noise machine, the one you found advertised for infants, and turn it on before grabbing your book to read for a few extra minutes.

Your staring at the pages like you found them to be blank. You’re phone dings next to you, signalling a notification.

Picking it up you find your mental health app sending you a daily reminder.

You’re allowed to feel your emotions.

***

Winter had run its course as you find yourself in April. You never really liked the cold, having been more sensitive to a gust of wind than the average joe, you were better suited to sitting with an aircon instead of being unable to move in the middle of Korea’s January cold rush. But alas, the cherries are blossoming and your fingers have defrosted.

That isn’t what’s on your mind right now though, as you’re standing in a Sephora, arms crossed and shoulders tense. You loved shopping for makeup, but you mostly chose to do it online unless you really had to otherwise. Parking yourself in the perfume section with the scents mixing together a cocktail of nosehair doom, you really wish you’d worn a face mask. Not to mention the migraine inducing coloured lights and mainstream pop playing in the background (you swear they’ve been playing Side to Side by Ariana Grande on loop since you got here).

These were all, however, peripheral observations for you, as you stare in absolute pneumonic shock at the number written on the price tag of the perfume you’re looking at.

Now, Mingyu is a man of class, high maintenance if you will. You’re well aware he likes to spoil himself, because he has a bank account to back it up.

Your bank account is definitely full and secure, but not enough for you to justify dropping what seems like half of its contents to something only one of the five senses can experience.

Mingyu mentioned in passing how he wanted this perfume a while ago, and knowing that he hadn’t ordered it for himself just yet, you decide to be the amazing friend that you are and surprise him for his birthday.

You may be regretting that right now, but you tentatively pick up the blue, crystalline bottle and spritz a bit on a paper strip before taking a whiff. It smelled good, that’s for sure, and it suited him too. So when the saleslady came to offer assistance, after you excused the last three, you decide you’re going to do this for him.

“Yes, could I have this in the box please?”

Walking back to your car you feel a bount of jitter run through you,

Oh, he’s gonna freak out when he sees this.

He did, in fact, freak when he saw it, and his reaction made you want to give him all of the good things in the world if you could see him like this all the time.

He’s smiling ear to ear and speaking in that high pitched voice that he gets when he’s excited. He’s thanking you over and over again, smoothing the box over in his hands repeatedly, looking at the ‘from: y/n :p’ with hearts in his eyes.

“I’m gonna save this for the rest of my life” he says, with determination and a goofy grin.

You snort at the declaration, “Sure, bud”

“I’m serious. What, you wanna bet?” he replies, taking a sip of his, latte, which you proudly credit yourself for swerving him over from Americano’s.

He insisted on going out to eat at this fancy French place a day before his actual birthday as he’d be busy on the day of, but it was risky for him to be seen eating out alone with a young woman at such a fancy place. You settled for a nicer traditional Korean restaurant, that allowed you to book a room away from possible prying eyes and one that you were both comfortable with. You decided to wait till you were back in the car with your post dinner coffee’s to give him his present.

“I’m giving you 3 months before that bottle’s dry to the dregs” You affirmed, “You smell like you empty half a bottle of something off your dresser everyday anyways”

You said it as an insult, but jokes on you because you loved the way he smelled.

“Fine, I’m gonna use this so carefully I’m not replacing it for at least a year”

“A year? What happened to the rest of your life?” you refute.

“I have you for that, don’t I”

What the fuckity fuck.

He’d turned to you, leaning on the headrest, that signature cheesy look; like he was in love or something. Voice dropping a couple octaves as he said it, laced with something defined and strong - enough for it to feel like the weight of an elephant had dropped on your chest.

You gather yourself after looking at him for a couple seconds, jaw unhinged and forgotten on the floor of his car. You chose to grab your cardigan that was neatly folded on the dash, and astral project it to his face across the seat. He’s laughing so hard there’s tears glistening in the corner of his eyes. He falls forward and you see strands of his hair fall to his face, he’d been growing them out.

“Shut up” you grumble in your seat, annoyed at how easy it was for him to send your heart through and beyond your chest.

He’s still giggling like a school girl, and you cave and give him a hint of a smile.

“There it iiiis” He announces, grabbing your face and smushing your cheeks together.

For a moment, he stops to look at you like this, like he’s contemplating. For one, brain rattling, organ exploding, microsecond, you think he might even kiss you.

Instead, he headbutts you slightly rubbing his head swiftly before letting go.

“I might need to wash my hands, I think I got your makeup on me” He mumbles, looking at his hands like a child with mud soaked palms.

“Serves you right, you buffoon,” You remark as you pull out your trusty travel pack of makeup wipes.

Yanking one out of the tab, you pull his hand over and try to wipe the remnants of foundation off, starting from the heel up to each individual finger. It’s silent as you concentrate on getting it all off both hands, he was wearing black tonight and knowing him he’d rub his hand over his pants and get beige foundation all over. You knew because you’d seen him do it one too many times.

“All done” you quip, looking up and catching his stare. He’s smooth to slowly look away and retract his open hands from your lap about 5 seconds after it became noticeable.

You busy yourself by attempting to stash away the wipes to throw out later, closing the pack of wipes and shoving them back into your bag.

He’s watching you do all of this, his stare is burning holes into the side of your head. He’s desperate to say something, but you’re not sure if you want to hear.

“Let’s go back to my place. We’ll stick a candle into a sheet brownie and call it your birthday cake. Oh, we can pick up ice cream too!”, You say, costuming your voice to sound unaffected by his vibe.

And so you did stick a candle in the fresh batch of brownies you both made at 11PM, two hours before his actual birthday. Sitting across from each other on the counter, Mingyu has his eyes closed shut, hands clasped, wearing a ridiculously coloured ‘BIRTHDAY BOY’ headband you found somewhere deep in your drawers.

“You’re gonna get wax on the brownies and they're gonna be inedible, hurry up” You groan, after everytime it seems like he’s done, he clenches his eyes shut again as he remembers another thing he has to wish for.

You’re not actually annoyed, he looks the cutest he’s ever looked, but you would appreciate non waxed brownies.

When he’s finally done, he blows out the singular candle and you clap lightly, “yay!”

You’re pulling out the candle and grabbing forks, dumping a couple scoops of ice cream on before you two start eating straight out of the pan.

Its a collection of groans as you both collapse on your couch, regretting eating all that so soon after dinner. He changed out of his dinner outfit to a T-shirt and pajama pants, he’d started keeping a set of clothes in his car when it started to become routine for him to spend regular  evenings after work at your place.

You’re in your own unicorn pajama’s, slumped over on the arm rest slightly. You feel Mingyu scooch over to put his head in your lap, claiming he was “closing his eyes for a minute”.

You knew how lightning fast he passes out, so not even 5 minutes later you start to hear his light snores. As much as you want to wake him up to move him to the bed, you know he can’t stay the night. His birthday meant he had to be with the boys, and needing to head out early tomorrow.

So you give him 10 more minutes, fingers tracing the shape of his features, in his soft hair massaging his head with your nails slightly. He had a little pout on his face as he slept. Things had been hectic for him lately, having a comeback later in the month and the plethora of music and variety shows to follow.

Mingyu had been writing lyrics on the kitchen island one day, sputtering random words as you quipped in rhymes of your own without context, stirring the pot of soup on the hob at the same time.  

One particular rhyme you spew out catches him off guard and he barks out a laugh at the ridiculous combination.

“I should put you on song credits for this”

“What do you think my producer name could be?”

He thinks for a second, “Banana bread sounds stupid, um, how’s brownie?”

“Cute, and serious enough” you agree, “I’ll be expecting to see my name on that album, sir”

Snapping out of your thoughts, you turn your attention back to the sleeping man curled up in your lap. You wonder if you could fall asleep on the couch too, keep him here with you for the night. Be a little selfish. It’d be nice, making waffles for breakfast when morning comes. But he needed to be at the dorm in the morning, the boys knew where he was but managers that’d come pouring in at 7 AM sharp, did not. And it was best kept that way. The last thing Mingyu wanted, you knew, was people getting the wrong idea. The thought stung a little bit, but you knew not to mix your hopes with what reality was giving you.

So you gather the courage to slowly reign him back from dreamland.

***

Your sitting with Mingyu and Seungkwan on the couches outside the dressing rooms, a little bit before they have to go to perform. You were done with your agenda and was waiting for them to start filing out before beginning to pack up.

“No, because why does he get to eat all the good stuff right out the oven and we don’t, that’s not fair” Seungkwan complained loudy to you, a mildly offended look on his face.

“Stop being such a complain bot, you’re never happy if I have nice things” Mingyu retorts, increasingly nasty looks being exchanged for an argument about freshly baked goods.

“Oh, I’m the hater?! Let me jog your memory, who was the one sulking and shoving me around when Y/n wouldn’t let you-”

Mingyu had jumped up and pulled Seungkwan into a headlock, his poor Americano half flying across the hall as he yells out in disarray.

“YAH!” cued with more noises of struggle and muffled threats.

You chose to embrace the violence by sitting in your seat and laughing as Vernon recorded their antics from the doorway inside eventually circing them for his supposed cinematic effect, catered for the inevitable weverse post that was to come.

Cut to them apologizing and cleaning up the mess of coffee and disregard.

You decide to be nice and attempt to make peace by reassuring Seungkwan, “Come over after you’re done promoting this week, I’ll make up for all the bread and cookies you missed out on”

“If you've finished with your escort duties Y/n, could you please come in and do your day job?”

The voice came from the doorway of the dressing room, your senior makeup artist standing there with her usual mildly inconvenienced expression. It took you a minute to fully understand what she meant by that sentence, your body completely still.

“Offended? What, like I’m wrong?”

You were no stranger to insulting behaviour in work places, but they’d always been revolving around your actual job description. People who didn’t like you knew they had to be smart on how they treated you regardles.

This was different. This felt like you were projected back in time to your solemn middle school days to mean girls taunting you about your spongebob socks, except multiply that by about a thousand.

You feel your stomach begin to churn as that nauseous feeling of shame began to settle itself into your veins.

You’re not sure how long you’ve been sitting there but when she slightly raises her voice; “Are you getting up or not?” your hands actively begin to tremble the slightest amount.

You’re making moves to get up by puting your coffee cup down, not knowing what to do except follow commands.

Your interrupted by a voice from behind; “She’s coming in, give us a minute”

Mingyu’s standing there, his expression stoic as Seungkwan and Vernon looked as stunned as you felt. You don’t register it in the moment, but the people in the hall, venue staff and those for other artists have also silenced, watching the scene unfold.

Her lips are in a tight line, her expression remaining irritated as she steps back inside the room.

You realise you need to do something to diffuse the escalated situation. Letting out a breathy laugh, you get up and tell them that you’ll be going inside, trying to keep your expression pleasant and unaffected, not waiting before turning around to spare them the burden of a response. People get yelled at everyday, and this is no different. You aren’t gonna be the one to make a scene out of a regular occurrence.

You know what's coming when you get inside, she’s waiting as she pulls you aside.

“Your behavior has been quite concerning recently, let me remind you of your place here and what you were hired to do. You've been dilly dallying with people who aren't even your friends, and its quite funny that you’d think they are. It's time to wake up from wasting your time making heart eyes at men who are way out of your league. I won't tolerate any more nonsense from you, and trust I won’t be this nice or forgiving the next time this happens”

You choose to nod your head.

“That’s another thing, use your own words. Don’t think other people are gonna be there all the time to speak for you” She spits out, her professional front slowly eroding the more she spoke.

“Yes, ma’am” You say, hoarse voice.

“Louder, next time”, she stalks out as majority of the people in the room also begin to leave for the filming downstairs.

You’re left standing awkwardly in front of the racks of clothes, trying to digest what just happened to you. Looking around the room, you try to figure out what your supposed to do.

Clothes on the couches, eyeshadow brushes on the floor. There’s a torn sponge resting underneath one of the chairs, a couple styrofoam boxes left on the tables from lunch.

There’s so much for you to do, you arent sure how you thought you had time to sit down and chat. But you’re not sure where to begin either. The room is a mess of smells and colours even without the buzzing noise of people getting ready. Tears begin to form as you try to navigate what you’re supposed to do, realising you can’t possibly find a starting point for any of this mess. Before you have time to think of anything else, a hand is holding onto your wrist, small and soft.

It’s Yoona, another one of the makeup artists.

“Y/n, I think it’s best if you go home, it’s been tiring.”

“But-”

“Don’t worry, I’ll handle her. Just trust me. Go home you’ll feel alot better”

She notices you hesitate for a second, and goes in to give you a hug.

It felt nice, to be hugged by a friend. For some reason, it didn’t feel like she was pitying you, her expression and aura reassuring you that you didn’t have to stand here alone.

“Whatever happened today shouldn't have happened, but you don’t need to think about that right now. Go home and do nice things for yourself, we’ll figure it out later. You have my number, give me a text once you get home. We can go out later if you want, when I get off work, to get your mind off things”

You’re not sure how you’re holding back the waterpark that has become of your tearducts as you hear those words from an unsuspecting friend, you nod with a smile. You feel a little more calm.

You can’t tell if you care enough to consider the consequences of your senior finding out how you’re doubling or nothing on your already posed humiliation. But the only thing you can think of right now is your bed and the ceiling you’d stare burn holes into.

So you, for the first time in a while, chose to choose yourself by picking up your satchel and leaving the chaos behind you as you walk to your car.

***

Just because you were brave where it mattered most doesn’t mean you weren’t allowed to cry.

You had come home, shot Yoona a brief text, and promptly began to sob the absolute Nile into your sheets.

You had never cried like this before, loud wracked sobs coming from a place in your chest you had locked away during a time you couldn’t even remember. You’re breathing after every choked cry is a sputtered intake of life, only to spit it back out as you let out another sob of what sounds like agony. There’s nothing in your head, nothing but the words that were spoken to you as echoes of your own mind. Hypocritical of you to hate them when the same words circled in your head like a mantra every cursed, unfortunate day. She had done you a favour, by spitting out the truth you’d stewed, chewed and kept in your mouth ever since you got here. This was a you problem, to believe that you were capable of things beyond your bracket. You were told by the universe, screamed at by the world, that this was never meant for you, and you chose to ignore it. You chose to be stubborn. You brought this misery upon yourself.

Once you’ve disposed your body weight of tears and snot and burden, you’re left to stare at your innocent sheets now stained with mascara and your sorrows. You crawl into your covers and rest your muscles for a few seconds, head empty. You aren’t sure when you drift off, but you're glad that you do.

You don’t dream for once.

***

You wake up feeling like you drank a gallon of water and went to sleep. Your eyes, nose and throat feel like they’ve been over watered yet dry at the same time. You don’t realise what’s really arising pangs of irritancy in your brain once you figure out the consistent sound is a door bell. You’re doorbell, of the house that you live in.

You’re slow to push yourself up, realising your slept in your day clothes. It’s dark out but you're not sure what time it is, and quite frankly, you can’t say you care enough to check. You need to silence your doorbell first, which can only be done by silencing whatever hell sent individual was playing drums on the button outside.

It’s a record screech in your brain as you peer through your peephole and realise who the aforementioned hell sent individual was.

Mingyu was outside your door.

You don’t realise you look like you crawled out of a sewer till it’s too late and you’ve already opened the door through muscle memory. Mingyu was always welcome in your space.

He was in casual clothes, his hair pushed back from the guessed hands that ran through it, but he was still in stage his stage makeup.  

“Oh, were you sleeping?” He asks, eyes a little wide, expression cautious.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll go then, you weren’t answering your phone for anyone and you told Yoona you were home but you weren’t opening the door, i was worried. Sorry I ringed it so much I probably should’ve assumed-”

He stops to look at you, and it’s like realizes something before he finally says; “Just wanted to make sure you were okay, I’ll see you around. I’ll leave you alone”

“Wait,” you croak out, licking your lips, conscious of your morning voice, “Can you stay? Please? If you can.”

He stops to look at you, expression changing from sheepish to defensive.

“No! I mean, yes. Yes. I’ll stay. I’ll stay for as long as you want”

You let him in as he slips off his shoes and you lead him to the living room. His presence in the familiar place seems like it last happened eras ago, when he was only here maybe a week prior.  

“You know where everything is, I’ll be back gimme like 5 minutes”

You’re scared to look at yourself in your bathroom mirror, so you don’t, and choose to scrub your face looking down at your sink. You change into a sweatshirt and trouser loungewear set, deciding to save your dignity a little bit further as you brush your hair and clip it back with a claw clip.

You take a breath before entering the living room again.

He’s sitting on the floor in your usual place, two steaming mugs on the coffee table, the tabs hanging out of the cup. He made you tea.

You sit down next to him, not really prepared for what you should be saying.

“How long has she been speaking to you like that?” He asks you quietly.

“She was always kinda itchy and uptight and stuff but, it was never like this” You say.

“Regardless, whatever that was, it was, wrong, uncalled for, all of those things” He says, sputtering a little bit.

He stops and sighs. It’s silect for a minute before he turns in his seat to face you, grabbing your folded legs and pulling you to face him too.

“Yoona heard everything she said to you after you went in, she heard it all. And she knows about some other stuff too. If you think, even for a second, that I’m not your friend, I might actually think there’s something wrong with you.

“If everything we’ve been through this past, almost a year, doesn’t amount to us at least being friends then I don’t know what it means to have one at all. You’re the first person in a while I’ve been able to be this open with. You know me better than most people, you’ve seen me at my worst and at my best. I’ve let you read me all you want, because I know I can be an open book if it’s you. I trust you more than I can trust myself sometimes, and I really wish you would trust me too.”

You’re watching him as he says all of this, you look up to make eye contact a couple times, and he’s looking at you everytime you lift your head.

“I do trust you. Probably more than anyone else. It’s myself I don’t trust. It’s hard for me to open up, I’m scared I’m gonna say something that’ll scare you away. And, I just thought maybe she was right today, that I need to realise that it can’t be that way between us, I have a job to do”

“What can’t be between us?”

“I like you, Mingyu. Like, I’m basically in love with you and have been since I fucking met you. I couldn’t believe that you could possibly be friends with someone like me, a confused, all over the place airhead who can’t tell right from left sometimes, forget you ever liking me. All that happened is that we became friends and I thought that this was as far as fate was gonna push us. All today told me was that … that was an overextension too. It was a wake up call that I can’t have everything in life. Things were going too well for us and I was letting myself think it could stay that way forever. I’m sorry for being this way, I’m sorry for making you feel uncomfortable and out of place. This is the last thing you’d want to hear from a friend and I’m sorry I’m putting you in this situation right now and that you had to go through that today-”

You don’t finish what your saying because you're interrupted. Interrupted by arms pulling you forward and into Mingyu in front of you.

Your both sitting in your living room at 3 AM, on the floor in front of your sofa like you both have so many times. Except now, Mingyu is holding you in his arms, and kissing you so delicately it hurts.

It’s warm, like getting into bed after a long day, the scent of home and security engulfing you as you begin to forget about the qualms of life.

He’s moving his lips slowly, with care and a feeling so overflowing you can’t describe.

He lets go slowly and rests his forehead against yours, his arms are around you tight, legs wrapped around your entire body so you can't escape - physically or mentally.

“You dumbass” You hear him say.

“I love you,Y/n. More than anything. And I need you to know that you don’t have to hide. If you think your thoughts are a burden then I want to carry it for you. I want you to realise you’re not alone. I want you to stop pushing me away. Everytime I want to do something nice for you, you try to push the effort to something else, everytime I try to take care of you, you have this look that makes me think you feel guilty for taking up my time or something. Everytime I think you’re about to ask me to stay the night, you remind me I have priorities and I should go, even though I know you want me to stay with you. I want you to stop caring so much for how other people feel and realise you can demand the same from the universe too. You deserve love and to be treated with care. You need to let people do that for you, love.”

Your looking at him now, your turn to have stars in your eyes.

He loves you.

And you feel it. You feel it in his words, in his eyes, in the kisses he’s leaving on your face, in his arms that are wrapped around you, ready to shield you from the world.

You don’t say anything as you fall into his chest, head on shoulder, relaxed body in the cage he’s made for you. You close your eyes as the tears are burning down your face. Except, this time they’re because your relieved.

You both got up from the uncomfortable floor and moved to your bed, still tangled within each other as you clarified everything else.

You found out that majority of the people who heard it were very upset at the situation, but didn’t know how to approach or confront her.

Seungkwan almost bust a blood vessel after he had digested what had happened, disbelief and threats on his tongue as he refused to get touched up by her during filming, apparently making a point to walk to somebody else. Seungcheol was thinking of trying to bring up the problem to management, considering how Mingyu too was distracted all the way home.

“The rest of them have gotten quite protective of you too, I think. It’s not like I shut up about you”

Apparently the only reason you were asked to start taking charge on makeup was because some of the other senior artists pressured your mentor to stop restricting you. It made you feel a little more secure that it wasn’t just you that felt pushed down.

She didn’t like that you were doing so well, considering it meant she was wrong about you and your abilities. It hurt her ego a little bit that people stopped preferring her to do their makeup or their touchups, how they wouldn’t interact with her the same way.

“Alot coming from a middle aged, married woman, attention seeking like a child” Mingyu added, scoffing with a sour face as he nuzzled into the crown of your head.

“The boys really like you by the way, they’ve been rooting for us since forever” He says, and your heart swells unimaginably so; you felt loved, so so loved.

You scooch up to plant a kiss on the underside of his chin and then one on his lips.

“That makes me happy”

“I’m happy that you’re happy. You deserve to be happy, everyday” He smooches you on the face again. “Oh, and don’t worry about that stinky face I’ll take care of her”

You laugh at the determination in his voice, but you wanted to clarify something.

“Please, let me handle her myself. I’ll ask for help if she’s stubborn but I wanna try by myself first”

“That was hot”

You push his chest away as you bark out a laugh at the random comment, hiding you face, by turning the other way.

He battles that by pull you back into his chest and continuing his atics

“What I can’t call my girlfriend hot. You’re hot. Your the sexiest motherfucker I’ve ever seen” smooch “You’re beautiful” and again  “amazing” and again “gorgeous spectacular-”

You don’t fall asleep until the sun has well made its way up the sky, taking the executive decision to sleep in till way past lunch and maybe even take a nap afterwards.

You don’t care how it goes, because your happy just being with him.

***

You met with Yoona a couple days later at a cafe.

“Seungcheol asked us if we were facing the same kind of behaviour from her too. And everyone told him she was stuck up and rude and stuff. He said he wanted to bring it up to management but it didn’t really concern him directly so they wouldn’t listen. He told us to do so ourselves and we thought about it, but we’re gonna need to tell them about that too”

You nod your head as you listen to her speak, it was making sense.

“I dont mind going up to management at all and talking about it. I get that the rest of the stuff is a little too tame to be considered, which sucks because she shouldn’t be talking to us like that at all”

“Mhm, and I was thinking we could vouch for you on how she was restraining you for almost a year. Basically not letting you do your job. That’d be a another thing for them to think about”

“Yeah. Let’s do it asap, how’s this Monday?”

“Perfect, I’ll add everyone to a group chat and let them know”

And go up to management you did, who were surprisingly understanding. Apparently having received multiple reports and even videos of the most recent incident to act as proof. It was working out for all of you, and it proved to stay that way as they responded with a promise to shift her to a different department.

You had gone home that day feeling fulfilled and relieved. Mingyu, a man with spectacular timing had also proceeded to send you a text as a distraction,

[Mingyu]: Kwan wants to come over

[Mingyu]: something about croissants

[Mingyu]: Should he text you ab it?

[You]: yeah ofc

[You]: I’ll order the butter

[You]: you tell him to text me lol

Two nights ago felt like it happened last year with all the unimaginable advances deciding to happen within the past 48 hours. Right now you were more excited for the company you were about to recieve, more concerned with making sure you made the best batch of croissants Seungkwan ever did see.

***

You were in the car with Mingyu outside the company building, waiting until the clock struck 9 to go inside.

Today was the last day you’d think about this, being called up for a face to face meeting with the staff member, so she could formally apologise. The team had planned a dinner tonight, to celebrate the end of her ‘wicked reign’ as Yoona described it.

You were finding friends everywhere, ones that were always there, pulling through for each other as you yourself navigated a new direction of thinking for yourself. You were learning to walk past your anxiety ridden desire to draw lines with everyone, as you took the first step with the dinner tonight. It would be fun for you, and a bond you’d begin to build.

You learned that you weren’t delusional anymore, and that Mingyu did love you the same. It had only been a week or so, but one of the happiest weeks of your life, despite everything. He was teaching you more lessons than he thought he was.

Mingyu squeezes your hand from the driver’s side as it was past 9, “Let’s go?”

“Lets go”

***

Mingyu’s way too enthusiastic as soon as he wakes up, indulging you in a morning (afternoon) makeout session, claiming he doesn’t care for you morning breath.

“Well I do!” you exclaim, pushing him off with a giggle “About your morning breath, stinky”

He clutches his chest in dramatic offense, “How could you? I thought you loved me”

You respond my projecting a cushion to his face.

“Do you want pancakes or eggs for breakfast?” You ask, legs hanging over the bed.

Mingyu looks up, a wicked glint in his eye, and you immediately know he’s going to say something of no help.

“I want you for breakfast” He says, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you back in bed.

“MINGYU!”

Needless to say, all was well.

[taesanluv3r]

latte art

kim leehan x reader

sort of love at first sight? barista!leehan improves his latte art just for his very first customer <3 those concept pics possessed me to write this hehe. super cutesy, i love u leehan! lowercase intended. pls excuse any spelling mistakes or grammatical errors! enjoyyyy

wc: 2,008

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

ding!

the bell above the door rang as it squeaked opened, alerting the handsome barista that was busy setting up his fancy coffee machines for the opening of his tiny café. kim leehan looked up, eyes widening at the figure that turned around to reveal itself- or rather, herself. the most beautiful girl the boy had ever seen in his entire life that would become his very first customer.

"uh...? hello?"

he must've been too into his head, not realizing that the pretty lady had moved from near the door over to stand right in front of him at the register. "huh? oh! hi! um...what can i- uh" he didn't ever expect to stutter this way- especially not when he had already went through every friendly barista greeting the night before this grand opening, but the boy couldn't help it. not when the very first person to enter the shop was this stupidly gorgeous stranger in front of him.

leehan sighs, "i'm so sorry...today's the opening of this place and you're the first customer so..." she giggles, "no worries...i get it" they share a smile. "would you totally hate me if i asked you to walk out and back in again so we can restart this?" he asks, smiling until his eyes formed crescent shapes. the girl laughs, "if you insist"

the scene replays all over again. this time, he was ready to greet her with a friendly smile as she re-entered the café. "hi there! welcome to kim's coffee. what can i get for ya?" the stranger couldn't stop the giggle from escaping her lips, finding the cute barista's sudden bubbly-ness amusing. "hm..." she begins, fingers against her chin as she looked up at the menu on the wall. "well...uh, leehan..." the girl trails off, learning his name from the tag pinned onto his apron. "what do you recommend?"

the way his name fell out naturally from her mouth sent about a gazillion butterflies to roam free in his stomach, a light pink blush brushing against his pale cheeks. "well uh..." he almost stuttered again from the sudden shyness but quickly straightened his back and regained his almost cocky confidence. "for a pretty girl like you...how 'bout our signature cappuccino? i could do some incredible latte art too" she widens her eyes, shocked by the compliment. "incredible latte art you say? i'll be the judge of that" leehan grins at her playful personality. "iced or hot?" he asks, beginning to click on the buttons displayed on the screen of the register. "hot, please"

"alright...one hot cappuccino for...?"

"yn!" - "one hot cappuccino for yn coming right up!"

yn nods, watching as he retreated to his coffee machines before she allowed herself to explore the café. it was a relatively small place- but the pretty blue paint on the walls made the space feel a little bigger. "you must be really into fishes..." she says, staring at the framed paintings of all kinds of sea-life and spotting the tank filled with fish over at the corner near the bathroom. the barista guy laughs, "yeah...if i weren't a barista i'd be underwater scuba-diving right now" she nods along with his words, finally taking a seat on one of the chairs at the bar-styled table, giving her the clearest view of the working boy.

"so why open a café?'' she asked, revealing to the boy her curious personality. "it's fun!" he says, his voice a little louder now to overpower the buzzing noise from the milk frother. "and..." he said, mindlessly pouring the fluffy milk into the coffee. "there's a possibility i get to meet pretty girls like you" she rolls her eyes at his comment, watching as he adds finishing touches to the coffee.

"et voila, one cappuccino for yn~ enjoy"

the girl chuckles lightly when he dramatically bows, placing the cup of coffee on the table right in front of her. his head that faces the floor lifts up quickly when he hears her breaking out into a fit of laughter. leehan looks up confused, eyebrows furrowing and head tilting off to the side. "so much for incredible latte art..." yn says, still in between catching her breath. he's still confused, but one look down at his creation was enough to understand the girl's reaction.

"ah..." the boy sighs, looking disappointingly at the lame excuse for latte art he had poured into the cup. "i mean what were you going for here? a...an alien?!" the girl exclaimed, causing herself to giggle all over again. he rolls his eyes playfully, "i was actually going for a rose...but i see where you got alien from..." he clicks his tongue, "guess that's something i still need to work on" yn agrees with him, "but try it, as long as it tastes good..." he watches in anticipation as the girl brings the cup to her lips, blowing on the hot beverage slightly before taking a sip. her eyes widen, "oh my god..." leehan is nervous, "what? is it bad?" she shakes her head hastily. "no, no! not at all! this is the best cappuccino i've ever had ever! like seriously"

yn's comments make him sigh in relief, pressing a hand over his chest. "oh thank god...i thought you were gonna bully me like you did my latte art" she laughs, "it wasn't bullying...think of it as harsh feedback!" the sweet smile on her face contradicted the sharp words that she said, it intrigued the barista boy...there was something about her he just seemed to really like- apart from how pretty she was.

a couple minutes went by and soon the cup of coffee was empty. "thank you for the yummy coffee, how much do i owe you?" yn asks, rummaging through her purse in search of her wallet. leehan shook his head, "no! in honor of being my first customer, it's on me" she furrowed her eyebrows, "don't be silly! c'mon give me a price" but he only shook his head once more, "nope! think of it as compensation...for the underwhelming latte art" she sighs, giving up on arguing with the handsome barista. ''if you come again tomorrow though, i'll let you pay~" his smile made her insides melt like chocolate, and she sighs. "sounds good..." she trails off, beginning to get off the chair and closer to the exit. before she leaves she turns to look at him once more.

"better show me that incredible latte art you keep boasting about though!" he laughs, "trust me...i'll be up all night perfecting it...just for you"

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

sure enough, the barista boy kept his word. the next morning rolled around and the boy begins to tiredly opened up his shop. slight dark circles evident under his eyes from the sleepless night he spent frothing milk at home and endlessly pouring them into cups of coffee. with a little more trial and error, and about a dozen more cappuccinos later, he finally perfected the art. the girl kept her promise as well, waking up bright and early so she could get dressed and head straight to the brand new coffee shop.

ding!

a feeling of deja vu washed over him at the familiar noise of the doorbell. "look who it is!" leehan cheered, clapping his hands together as the girl he was expecting entered the shop. yn smiled, "i expect you have perfected that latte art?" he nods, "well i promised you, didn't i?" she giggles, "ah yes...if i recall...just for me, right?" the girl teased, repeating the pretty words he had told her the other day. the boy blushes softly, scratching the back of his head.

"why don't you take a seat? one hot cappuccino with incredible latte art for the beautiful yn, coming right up!"

just like the previous day, the girl sits at the bar. patiently waiting for the barista to do his job. this time she notices the droplet of sweat that formed to the side of his forehead, his eyes narrowed like a hawk as he stared at the liquid he was pouring into the cup. "wait!" he suddenly says, frantically stopping himself and turning to his one and only customer. "what?" she asked, just as frantic as he was. "can you like not look at me while i do this...it makes me nervous" yn opens her mouth in shock, rolling her eyes once before she turned around in her seat, her back now facing him.

"okay..." she heard him whisper to himself, assuming he had finally begun pouring the frothed milk into a design on her coffee. then the girl hears him let out a breath, followed by his footsteps and a clink of a cup meeting the surface of the bar-like table. leehan clears his throat before beginning to speak.

"a hot cappuccino with improved latte art, for one pretty lady"

yn took his words as a signal to turn back around. honestly the girl had kept her expectations low, not really believing that anyone could perfect such art overnight. however, a look of pure surprise washed over her complexion as the cup of coffee came into sight. it was perfect. the foam in a clear rose shape, totally different from the alien-looking image she saw just the other day.

"what did i tell ya? perfect, right?" leehan grins widely, overly proud of his professional talent. he watches in amusement as his customer nods, "wow...this is amazing, leehan!" yn exclaims, pulling out her phone from her bag and snapping a couple pictures before she had to ruin it to drink. "and..." she begins, taking a sip out of the drink. "still delicious!" the barista smiles happily at her satisfaction.

"no but seriously, how did you manage to perfect it overnight?! you a wizard or something?" yn asks, editing the picture she had taken so she could upload it on her instagram story. leehan giggles, listening to her talk as he cleaned up his station in case other customers began showing up. "i'm starting to think you've always been good and just messed it up yesterday on purpose so you could get me to come back here" she states, making up scenarios for the boy's sudden perfection. he turns to her with a smirk, "and what if i did?" his teasing question makes her ponder for a moment before she displayed a similar smirk on her lips.

"well then it worked, didn't it?"

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

"so how much do i owe you? you promised i could pay if i came back today" yn spoke, her wallet already prepared in the palm of her hand. "fine, it's $4.99" leehan says, pressing on a couple buttons on the screen. "okay, here...sorry, i don't have any small change right now" the girl pouted, handing him a $20 bill. "no worries..." he replied, opening up the cash register to collect her change. "oh shit....looks like there is a worry, i don't have change either..." the girl's eyes widen, "oh no!" she frowns, "what should we do?" they both look up for a minute, trying to come up with a solution. she could tell he thought of something when a cheeky grin takes over his face.

"say..." leehan begins, handing the $20 bill back to her. "you keep this...and you can just give me your number instead! pay me for the coffee at our date this weekend" the barista's sneaky solution surprises her once again. yn rolls her eyes, "now i'm really convinced that everything you do is a rouse to see me again" but her actions contradict the uninterested tone of her voice as she steals the pen from the pocket of his apron, grabbing a piece of tissue and beginning to jot down her digits.

"there...you better call me" he nods happily as he retrieves the tissue from her hands. "i promise, and you know i always keep my word" she giggles, "just for me though, right?" yn asks one last time before making her way over to the door. and right before she leaves leehan replies,

"just for you"

the end.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖

AAAAAAH i loved writing this fic sm :3 also i luv barista leehan LIKE THOSE PICS FROM YESTERDAY #needthat 🤤 also cant wait for this comeback heehehsgegehhe i hope u guys liked this! reblogs and feedback r greatly appreciated as always. tysm for reading! love, kona.

[maarrgarr]

The Unknow Heir.

masterlist of The Unknown Heir.

Gojo Satoru x fem! reader.

Synopsis: The reader returns after being gone for two years and leaving her boyfriend, Satoru, without giving him a reason. But now she doesn't come back alone.

Warnings: English is not my first language, possible grammatical and spelling mistakes, some plot changes.

Much to Ryusei's chagrin, you and Gojo decided that he would stay with Shoko until the two of you finished talking and arranging how parenting would go.

You noticed how when they both arrived with Ieiri, Satoru didn't greet her, you assumed he was offended with her because she also knew about Ryusei and didn't say anything to him. But from the look Shoko sent you, she wasn't too worried about Gojo's anger.

After that, you two decided to go talk at a cafe, well, actually Satoru told you "We'll talk at the usual cafe." and you just agreed.

The usual coffee shop was a place that, when you were dating, you loved to go. Satoru loved the mochis they made there and you loved the latte there.

What you didn't know was that Satoru hadn't gone there since the last time he went with you.

You two were sitting there, consciously or unconsciously, at the same table where you used to sit when you were teenagers.

It was a shame that this time's talk wasn't as fun as the ones you guys used to have.

Obviously you had to be the first to speak, "Well, I don't know what your requirements are going to be" you told him knowing perfectly well that with Satoru nothing was that easy, "But I say that Ryu keeps living with me and you can spend a few hours with him every day and-" he interrupted you.

"No" he said "No? not what?" you asked him, "I don't accept that proposal. "You take away the opportunity to spend the first three years with my son and now you think you are the one who can say what we are going to do?" you closed your mouth. “You are so wrong, Y/n.”

"First of all Ryusei will no longer carry the last name Mochizuki, he is Gojo from today onwards" you instantly disagreed, "No" you said, "Why not? He is my son" He responded, "Because just because he's your son, they can try to do something to him and I'm not going to allow them to hurt him" You told him, but he quickly replied, "Precisely because Ryusei has my last name and everyone knows that he is my son, no one is going to dare touch him even a hair. The opposite would be if no one else knows and gossip starts to spread, then maybe they will use it against me."

Satoru noticed that you were still not very convinced, but he knew perfectly well the tactics to convince you. So he softened his tone a little, took off his glasses and looked you in the eyes, "I promise I won't let anyone hurt Ryu." You sighed and ignored his gaze, knowing perfectly well what he was doing, but what bothered you was that even after years, that still had the same effect on you. "Fine, he will have your last name" Gojo smiled triumphantly and inwardly as he realized that, at least, you hadn't completely become a stranger in his eyes.

Tag list:

@moonlightazriel @qundadedingle11 @yozora7154 @byakuya61085

[suzyandthefox]

Clarification, Apologies,A word for the community, and Blog Updates..

On 31st of July, around a week ago, A situation involving some users, myself included, happened, causing me to go on a temporary hiatus for a week, as it was handled indelicately and caused a lot of harm to users who never asked to be a part of it.

For the sake of privacy and not stirring the pot again, I will not name any of the users.

I should clarify that English is not my first language, so there might be grammatical mistakes in this.

TLDR: I was careless and I reblogged from NSFW blogs not knowing they were NSFW blogs, causing harassment to other members of the community. I have deleted these reblogs and I decided to not reblog anything on this blog for the safety of everyone.

Elaboration under break:

It started when an user, who I will not name, made a callout post about me. They screenshotted reblogs I made, and while I still believe that that user fully intended to cause drama instead of addressing any real issue, they were right in calling my mistakes out.

Throughout several months, I have reblogged from NSFW accs, even though I have a bold NSFW DNI on the top of my blog. I have also reblogged from an MDNI account multiple times despite having minors on my blog, endangering both parties.

I have since blocked these accounts and deleted these reblogs. However,that doesn't undo the damage I already did.

I know I have problems with many social skills, like social cues and etiquette. I do have Autism and ADHD after all. This led to, when I was reblogging things that I found cool, me accidentally missing many of the signs that most would have seen. I didn't realize what was happening until someone told me.

At the moment of the discourse, this blog had 194 followers (202 as I write this). In any other social media platform, this number means you're basically invisible, and so that's the logic I went with. I thought nobody saw this blog so I was lenient with my content, treating this blog as my personal shitposting place.

However, after this discourse,I realized that I am being seen on Tumblr. That unfortunately was at the cost of accidentally hurting innocent users who never asked to be a part of this, along with ruining my mental health for a while.

There have been kind hearted users who defended me, and users who told me that I am being looked up to and that I am a well respected member of the community, which is something I will remember for the rest of my life.

What I am trying to say is, I fucked up. Badly. Yet despite that, the community has given me a second chance, proven by the fact that I wasn't blocked or unfollowed (Quite the opposite actually)

I now understand the responsibility that I have and that I need to be very careful with what I post, especially since I have made the choice to let minors interact with this blog. I now understand I must look after them because of that.

I apologize so much for everyone that has been hurt by this. I won't ask for forgiveness. I only ask that everyone knows that I have acknowledged my mistakes and I promise to better myself in the future.

I am a human and I make mistakes, please don't ever be afraid to tell me when I do something wrong. (Tell me, by messaging or commenting. Please not by making a call out post on me, since this has proven to hurt more than help others.)

I made this blog to be a safe place to enjoy a certain trope without getting hurt, and I want to live up to that. For the safety of everyone, me included, I will make some changes to this blog.

Changes:

1: No more reblogs

This blog was handled indelicately, and unprofessionally, and I decided that I will change that, I will make this blog into an Art/Writing blog first and foremost, With prompt posts being a second priority.

The only exception to this will be fanworks or fanfics or things that are directly made for me/things I am mentioned in, I will tag them accordingly depending on content.

2: This blog is now +16

Yes, I interacted with users younger than 16 before, Yes,I have followers who are less than 16. I have thought about it deeply and I realized that for the sake of not hurting anyone, and if I wanted to be more comfortable around this blog, then I need to keep people who are slightly closer to my age range, Instead of censoring myself,

that's because I have taken a liking to (Nonsexual) fatal vore and gore, I want to make similar content in the future, as well as other darker topics.

I will not block anyone who is younger than 16, but I will not directly interact with you anymore, even if I'm not responsible for your actions, it's just to be safe.

Now I need to make some things clear:

I am not a minor so I can interact with MDNI blogs and they can interact if they wish to. As long as they're SFW

But, again, I will not reblog from them for the safety of those who are minors following my blog.

Vore is nonsexual for me and I don't want my work to be sexualised, especially because I depict myself in it.

I have absolutely nothing against people who are into it sexually, I just don't want my work in these circles.

I can't control how my work is perceived and where it goes, however my blog is SFW (In the sense that there's nothing graphic or sexual on it), meant for people who are also interested in that content, and so I don't want to see people who think it's “hot” here.

I am not responsible for anyone's actions on this blog, I am not responsible for people who find my content weird or sexual or whatever,I am not responsible for the minors on this blog, I am not responsible for my mutuals, I am only responsible for my own actions.

This community has been extremely supportive of me, and there have been people who comforted me during this whole situation, without them I probably would've deleted my blog from sheer panic.

I owe these people my life, thank you so much for being on my side.

I hope that one day, my blog can be a source of comfort too.

Thank you for reading and I hope you guys have a wonderful day!

[aristenfromwarsaw]

Because of you...

This is my first fanfic I've ever written. 💜 I guess it's not the best fanfic in the world, but you have to start somewhere 😃. Since I had this scene in my head for a long time, I decided to put it down on paper. If there are any grammatical or construction errors, please let me know - English is not my native language, so I could have made a stupid mistake somewhere 🙈.

💜 Pairing: Spawn Astarion x F!Tav (Aristen ~ Redemption Dark Urge ~ High Elf ~ Sorcery ~ Storm Sorcery.)

💜 Summary: the action takes place after the events of the game. Aristen and Astarion live in Baldur's Gate and help rebuild it. Astarion now finds it easier to talk about his feelings with Aristen, and they both get used to life on their own terms. However, even though Aristen is free from Bhaal, she feels great remorse for what she has done when she was under her father's control. Aristen can't deal with it and bad thoughts start to overwhelm her and finally her emotions explode.

💜 Content/tags: romance, deep love, feeling of guilt, trauma, suicide attempt.

💜 Word count: 1 154.

It was a warm and quiet evening when Aristen was sitting in an armchair and reading a book. Or rather, she tried to read. The elf had been having a bad time for a few days, she was constantly thinking about what she had done when she was under the influence of her murderous father. The sorcerer also was very afraid that one day Bhaal would come back and take her under his care again. Because why wouldn't he come back, gods are eternal. And if he comes back, he'll probably hunting for his demigoddess daughter. Unfortunately she hiding her bad mood from her lover, which made her feel even worse. But Aristen just wanted to see by her beloved as a strong and confident woman, not an elf damaged by her own past. She also didn't want to burden her lover with her problems when he himself was struggling with his own trauma.

Suddenly Aristen was brought out of her thoughts by the sound of a key turning in the lock. The woman walked to the door and greeted the person who entered the house with a kiss - of course it was Astarion, the only person in the world who understood her so well.

- “Hello Darling” - Astarion said with big smile of his face.

- “Hi Love, would you like some of that wine you brought yesterday, it's delicious” - Aristen asked while pretending that everything is fine with her.

- “Of course, how could I refuse?”- the pale elf replied in his sweet voice.

- “By the way, I heard that they are going to build a monument with our likenesses for saving the city. No wonder, who wouldn't want to have a statue with so beautiful vampire in their city ? ” - he added.

Immediately Astarion heard the sound of breaking glass when he hung his coat on the hanger. He quickly looked towards his love and was terrified. Aristen stood among the broken glass and was shaking. Her magic began to live according to its own will. Electric sparks swirled around her.

- “Do these people even realize who is responsible for all this !? ” - Aristen started screaming. - “It's me! I am responsible for all this chaos, I am responsible for the death of a hundred. The city should hate me, the inhabitants should come to me with torches and weapons, not treat me like a hero ! I'm just repairing what I've broken, nothing more ! I hate myself and I not a hero ! ”- the women started crying and shouting.

-“Darling, please try to calm your magic. I can't even come close to you and talk with you calmly. ” - said the pale elf with care in his voice. ”

Astarion's voice, always full of love and care, was the only thing that could calm down Aristen. Slowly, her magic returned to full control. As soon as the sparks stopped swirling around the woman, Astarion quickly come to his lover and hugged her.

- “My Love, I didn't know that you suffer so much because of your past. Why didn't you tell me about it? ” - Astarion asked, almost whispering.

- “I didn't want to worry you, you have your own traumas. I also want you to see me as a brave and confident woman, not a victim of my own actions. ” - the sorcerer replied still shaking and continuing to cry into Astarion's chest.

- “Oh Aristen, I see you as a brave and self-confident woman, with or without your traumas, crying or laughing. And you're not a monster. How can a person with a heart like yours call themselves that? For me and other people you are an angel, not a demon. And when you committed your crimes, it was not my Aristen, but her father. And please don't hide such things. If you are having a bad day and want to talk, cry or just hug, come to me, I will always be here for you my Love.” - Astarion said in a soothing and calm voice and hugged her even tighter.

After a few minutes of holding Aristen hardly in his arms the vampire felt that his beloved calmed down. She stopped shaking and the crying subsided slightly.

- “Honey, I want... I want to tell you something else.” -Aristen said quietly.

- “I'm all pointy ears, my Love.” - he whispered in her ear.

The sorcerer didn't want to talk about the incident that happened a few days ago, she was supposed to keep silent about it forever. But she felt so safe in vampire's arms that she decided she had to finally let it out.

- “A few days ago, when I was home alone I had a really bad day. Thoughts of what I had done as Dark Urge still haunted me. At some point I thought about taking a knife... and ... ending it... you know what I mean.” - women said, gripping Astarion's shirts tighter in her hands.

- “By the Gods, Aristen....” - the man replied with fear in his voice.

- “But I didn't do it...because...because of you... I... I know I don't deserve you... your love... any love for what I've done. But... but I love you so much and this feeling between us... and... and... I don't want to lose it... It's the only thing that gives me a gleam of hope that it will get better with time... And... I just don't want to destroy this... this beautiful feeling that connects us... And I don't want you to be alone in this crazy world... So don't worry, I will never do it. ”- Aristen said quietly.

Astarion didn't know what to say. He was the one who thought he didn't deserve such a beautiful and good person as Aristen. After all, he saw how men looked at her, she could have had almost anyone, but she chose him. The damaged elf who could only give her his own traumas. The pale elf admits she deserved a better man, but he loved this woman too much to leave her. She was his friend, his lover, his savior.

After a few minutes of silence, Astarion took her head in his hands and looked deep into hers bright blue-turquoise eyes.

- “Darling, please, don't talk about yourself like that. If anything, I'm not worthy of you. You are such an incredible person and you deserve all the best, not the traumatized vampire. But I guess love is blind... or strange. And please remember what I said earlier, I will always be there for you. You should always tell me if you feel worse... remember, always.” - the Astarion said.

- “I promise you that... I'm sorry” - the elf replied crying again, cuddling into pal elf.

And the silence fell, broken sometimes by Aristen's soft crying...

[littlexscarletxwitch]

A comfort request for Florence where she takes care of the reader after they break their leg. Flo is there when the injury happens, and once she drives you home from the hospital she wants to take care of you. 💕

── ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎ 𝗹𝗲𝘁 𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂

paring: florence pugh x fem!reader

tag(s): fluff, established relationship, comfort (?)

warning(s): grammatical errors, unedited, language, broken leg (not explicit tho)

word count: 1,276

note: I'm back, bitchez. I don't know why this took so long, but I'm glad it's finally finished. I've never had a bone broken so I actually don't know what that's like, so I had to ask my dear friend google. Sorry if it's not accurate. Thank you for this request, anon. I really hope you like it. I'm not a native english speaker, so please let me know about any sort of mistake. Hope you guys enjoy <3

requests are open! + check my rules here <3

As soon as you hit the ground, you felt a burning feeling covering your whole leg. 

“Shit,” was your first thought. The only thing that your brain could think of because of the pain covering your limb. 

When Florence came running to find you, you were already on the ground. She took a quick look at the fallen chair beside you and you on the ground, and connected the dots. You clearly wanted to reach something way above you, and instead of asking for her help, you tried to do it on your own. 

And now, you were on the ground, crying, trying to move your leg but all you could feel was that burning feeling, it burned so much that you thought it was going to burn your whole body. 

“Baby, what happened?” Florence came to your aid, she knew something was really wrong when you didn’t stand back up immediately.

“I, I think I broke my leg,” you cried out, not wanting to move the limb not even one bit, afraid it would hurt even more. 

Florence was freaking out, she’d never see you like this before, a crying mess. But she had to remain calm, for the both of you. 

“It’s okay, honey. I got you,” Florence, carefully, picked you up, bridal style. 

All your mind could focus on was the burning feeling on your leg,  you couldn't listen to Florence reassuring words, or billie barking at the two of you knowing something had happened to you. You were so lost in your pain, that you didn’t even realize that you were already in the car, Florence driving you to the nearest hospital. 

[...]

Waiting for you to get out of the doctor’s office felt like hell, she couldn't go in with you, since the office was really small and there were already a lot of people all over you, doing their work. Florence could not interfere with that, she was an actor not a doctor. But not knowing how you were doing was eating her alive. 

After what felt like a hundred years, you came out of the office, in a wheelchair since now you had a leg-cast. Florence’s eyes got watery at the sight of you, relieved that you were alright, but anguished that you were in that state —unable to walk on your own.

“Hey, you,” you said to her, pleased to finally see her face. There was something about Florence’s presence that just calmed you down, she made you feel at ease. And even though you were a bit off, because of the painkillers, you knew that Florence’s presence was what made you feel better.

“Hey,” she walked over to you and left kisses all over your face, thankful that you were okay and finally with her. 

“We gave her some painkillers, they should wear off in a couple of hours. It was a severe fracture, hence the cast. Which will stay on for about six weeks and then we’ll see how her leg is doing,” Florence could only nod at the doctor, trying to engraved every word in her mind. “Try to keep her leg up as much as possible, for at least the first week. Don’t get the cast wet, if so, you should come immediately since water will weaken it, and her bones will no longer be properly supported. Even if it itches, don’t let her scratch it or poke it, it would cause a nasty sore or it would lead to an infection. And, of course, she can’t walk on it,” the doctor finished. 

“Right. Thank you, doc.”

“I will see you in about six weeks, okay, hon?” she now said looking down at you. 

“Okay,” you smiled at her. 

“Let’s get you home, baby.”

[...]

As soon as the both of you got home, Florence picked you up once again, and took you to your shared bed. Even though it was a bit embarrassing to be carried around and not be able to walk on your own, you actually liked being in Florence’s arms. The way she lifted you so carefully and easily made your heart flutter. You quietly thanked that Marvel training. 

She, slowly but surely, put you on the bed. She gently rested your leg on a pillow and made sure you were comfortable. She said that she was going to make some tea for you and told you to rest, she could see how tiring the whole thing had been for you. You tried to tell her that there was no need, but she insisted anyway. And who were you to say no to that woman?

She came back ten minutes later with your favorite tea and some biscuits. You internally laughed at that sight, her British side showing up now more than ever. 

“Okay, here you go, little lady. I figured you would be hungry as well, so I brought you those biscuits you love so much,” you smiled at her. 

“Flo…”

“I was thinking” she said, not giving you any chance to talk, “maybe I can cook your favorite, after all you deserved it.”

“Flo…” you tried once again. 

“Also, I called your secretary earlier and let her know what happened, she said she was going to take care of everything and said to tell you to not worry about anything.”

“Florence…”

“Oh, and your mum called when we were in the hospital. She was really worried when I told her what happened, and said that you should call her as soon as you can.”

“Florence!”

“Sorry. What can I do for you? Do you need me to adjust your pillow? Are you cold? Are you hot?”

“Just stop,” you laughed. Your hands now on her cheeks forcing her eyes on you. “You are amazing, you know that?”

Her eyes moved south, now avoiding yours. You realized something was wrong with her. 

“If I were so amazing, nothing would have happened to you,” she muttered, but loud enough you could hear her perfectly, which made your heart sink.

“What are you talking about?”

“I just, let me take care of you, okay?” she now looked up, meeting your eyes. You noticed tears were forming on them.

“Baby, you do know that this wasn’t your fault, right?”

“Y/n…” she trailed off.

“No. This was on me, okay? I was just stupid.”

“But, baby, if I would have run faster then maybe I would have–”

“No. Don’t do that. This wasn’t because of you. You hear me?” 

“I–”

“It wasn’t, Flo. There’s nothing you could have done, okay?”

“Okay,” she said looking at you, finding some comfort in your gaze. 

“Okay. Now, you said something about making my favorite?” you pecked her lips, trying to kiss all her worries away. 

“Mmm, yeah. Would you like that?” she giggled, thanking you for the change of subject.

“Yes, I would like that very much,” you left kisses all over her face. “Do you know what I would also like?”

“What?”

“How about we cuddle for a bit and then you can nurse me all you want?”

“That sounds perfect,” she replied, kissing you lips.

[...]

Later that night, Florence was all over you, more than she usually would. She even insisted on giving you a bath, which it didn’t take you long to agree to since you loved having her hands all over your body. Even if it was just to wash you up. You didn’t like having your leg fractured, but you had to admit that you liked this extra attention from her. Maybe having your leg broken wasn’t so bad after all. Not if you had nurse Flo to take care of you. 

Likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated! <3

-M

[tomatoswup]

Hello !! Can i have some fluff for tristamp!vash please 👉👈 (i'm sorry if i made some grammatical mistakes, english is not my first language :'))

Reader is ww's little sister, and she admires her brother so much that she would copy his cool characteristics, but deep down her personality is more shy, introverted, pure and innocent (as a result of hanging around with vash). One day ww asked his sister to go and confess to vash already (bcs ww can't take it anymore to see both vash and his sister just so sickeningly oblivious about eachother's feelings). So the reader went to confess to vash trying to be cool like her brother and all but failed miserably and return to her original personality (which leaves her stuttering, fidgeting, etc.)

I just realized it's so long- (I'm sorry 😔) feel free to pass this req :D and please keep yourself safe and healthy despite your busy schedule ^^

Confess!

A/N: Thank you for the request anon🫶🫶 This came out alot more longer than i thought,, also sorry for the late response I was multitasking with some work I was doing for school :/ i hope i did the request right -wheeze- Sorry for making you wait D: Enjoy🌱

warnings/tags: vash x reader, little sister!reader and big brother! Wolfwood,,, fluff, 2 am writing bc i need to fix my sleep schedule asap💪💪,, trigun coded chaotic confession from reader,,

Wolfwood liked to consider himself to be an observer, in more ways than one. Being a "priest" on the side, observation was one of the key things he did to keep both you and him alive in these treacherous deserts of No Man's Land but sometimes.

Oh just sometimes, it felt like a curse. And maybe it felt like that because he had watched on as his baby sister slowly fell in love with a moralistic idiot...Eh like a quarter of an idiot really.

"Ow ow ow..." Vash winced in pain as you tightened the bandages on his arm. After a nasty bounty hunter encounter, the group of you guys had decided to take a moments break from the road and crash at this small town that hadn't been too far from where you guys had been. And since having been given a med-kit by a kind family you had run into a while back, you took it upon yourself to patch everyone up with a stern eye, one that Wolfwood often shot at people.

In reality, it was the worst stern eye that Wolfwood couldn't help but want to stifle his laugh.

"Oh shut it, always getting hurt." You scoffed at the sorry-smiling blonde, cleaning the small gash on his right cheek "You act like you can’t die Vash, we're not all immortal..." He let out another small squeak of pain as you accidentally pressed down a little too hard on the wound "You need to take care of yourself a little more."

"Sorry about that.. I’ll try to be careful next time.." Vash sweat-dropped, trying to stop shying away from the cloth of alcohol you held up to him.

From above, Wolfwood dug into the pockets of his jacket, rummaging for another loose lollipop as he watched from the top compartment of the car in silence to not disturb the pair of you.

What? He was there first! Talking about ruining his evening nap..He put the newly found lollipop into his mouth and continued to watch on.

"Hey..." Vash muttered as you swiped your finger across his cheek, making sure the bandage held up.

"Hm?"

With a jolt, you quickly looked up when you felt the warmth of another hand cover your own. "Are you okay?" Vash asked softly as he gave you a concerned glint. Shit, you hadn't noticed you were slightly trembling.

Maybe that encounter ruffled your feathers a bit too much...Were you okay?

"I-" You choked out, feeling that odd churning sensation in your chest that you've only really come to realize you would get only around him. And it made you mentally blow a fuse.

W-What do you say!?!

It took a moments thought before you regained your composure at the sudden touch "I'm..I’m fine Vash.” You reassured him, playfully using your freehand to fix the glasses that had been falling off his nose “Don’t worry about me.”

'Are you kidding me?' Wolfwood thought in exasperation. 2 months, these small little talks and touches have been going on for 2 months now. Two months of him enclosed in a car as the both of you passively flirted with each other.

Yes, passive. Little bits here and there and suddenly you wear his jacket sometimes?

He can't handle the both of you anymore, it felt like he was drinking a overly sugary soda.

At least put a name to it!

Spotting Roberto making his way back to the car from not too far away, an idea struck up in Wolfwood's mind. Something to end the suffering, and something to perhaps help his little sister out.

"HEY ROBERTO!" Wolfwood lazily called out, jump scaring both Vash and you into standing like mercenaries ready for war. Looking up, you couldn't help but frown to see your brother mischievously waving down at the two of you.

"TAKE NEEDLE NOGGIN WITH YOU TO FIND SOME OF THE CAR PARTS! Let his ass do something..." He muttered the last part under his breath as Vash sighed, ultimately being pulled from the back of his jacket by Roberto who continued to walk down the road.

Was that a "Can we leave" from Roberto or was it just you?

"I'LL BE BACK!" You heard the spiky blonde shout out to you, and well, you couldn't help but laugh out and wave.

"Now that he's gone..." Wolfwood pressed down on the lollipop with his teeth until a small crack emitted, starting to chew on the poor candy "Seriously? Why don't you just tell him you like him already?"

Stuffing the med-kit back into your bag, you brushed him off "Nic I don't like him.."

Your brother let out a large, rugged laugh "Are you kidding me? For just being friends you two spend an awful long time alone together."

You felt the heat rise up to your face and god did you hope that it was because of the sun.

"Sorry but I'm gettin' tired of seeing the two of you pin for each-"

Wolfwood was interrupted by your muttering, making him hop off the roof of the car for a closer listen "Wanna say that one more time?"

"I can't..." You muttered as you slapped your hands on your cheeks, shooting your older brother a worried, red look "What if he says no?"

No?

You were worried if the love-struck idiot said no?

Have you really not seen how he would stare at you?

Wolfwood couldn't help but tilt his head in disbelief, the stick of his lollipop hanging off the edge of his mouth "Did you really- You try acting like me but you can't confess a little crush? What happened to that?"

You couldn't help but let out a tired exhale, he did have a point after all. As much as you did try to act like him, all brave and careless, you weren't him. Most honestly, the opposite and Vash had come to prove it too many times that you could count.

And maybe you were a bit too mean while you were putting bandages on him..

You covered your mouth, shyly looking away from your brothers' gaze.

Those times he had comforted you whenever you couldn't sleep, or when you were hurt-

"Oh spare me the shyness!" Wolfwood put a hand on his waist, putting his weight to one leg "Shit, if you don't tell him then I'd might as well-"

"NO!" You gasped out in horror at the idea. "No?"

Picking your bag off the floor, you massaged the bridge of your nose "I'll....Shit I'll do it."

Eh, Wolfwood bet two lollipops and a cup of sand that you were really gonna do it. But anything to end this suffering he's witnessed for god knows how long.

"Well, I'm just sayin' you should do it already. Its been way past due anyways..." He flickered his eyes back to you as he roughly ruffled the top of your head, making you whine in annoyance "Ouch Nic stop-"

"Just tell me when you do it. I'll kick his ass if he tries anything weird-"

"SERIOUSLY!?"

"I'M BEING SERIOUS!"

///

And that's how you found yourself outside the small town's saloon. Having asked Meryl where Roberto had dragged Vash, she pointed you to the right direction yet it was one you were a bit hesitant to follow.

Did you ever expect yourself to go into a saloon alone?

Hell no, you didn't even really find yourself talking to people in places like that. The last few times you've actually visited a saloon were only really just you sitting in a corner with Meryl or trying your best to sit away from people, watching as you ate your little plate of food but...

Would it really look weird if you strolled right in?

"It's alright..." You egged yourself on quietly "You can do it..Maybe if I just stroll in like Nic it'll be easy..."

I don't think you've seen how Wolfwood himself has entered bars...yikes..

With only a seconds hesitation, you pushed your legs forward and through the wooden double doors of the saloon, striding right into the loud bustling energy filled room.

Okay maybe you should’ve waited a bit more-

Yelling, laughing and god knows what those words were thrown in the air as the severe smell of sweat reached your nose, making you instinctively scrunch your face in disgust. Ew.

"Excuse me miss!" A waitress yelped out, making you take a quick step back nearly avoiding a bad collision with the poor girl serving drinks. Busy day it seemed, but you were here for other things.

Let's see, where could the two of them be- The sudden shout of your name made you do a double take around the room until the flash of red met your eyes and before you realized it, you saw Vash's waving hand of blue shine under the lights.

Well that was easier than you thought!

A wide smile on his face, his eyes practically sparkled as you pushed past several bar-goers and to his table. "Aren't I glad to see you!" Taking the seat next to him, you looked around the room once again "Wasn't Roberto suppose to..." You trailed off, turning and seeing the bummed out look on Vash's face.

"Well, we were gonna get the parts, but he saw the sign outside-"

Ohhh, the "if you bring two people they'll give you 50% off" poster...Made a lot more sense to be honest.

"And well, I guess you know what happened from there..." He sighed, resting his head on his hand, closing his eyes dramatically before batting them up at you "Now why are you here? I know you're not a big fan of these kinds of places."

So it did look weird!

Oh god...Your face began to feel a bit more hotter than usual as you unconsciously started playing around with a loose thread on your pants "Oh um...W-Well I came to tell you..." You nervously laughed out as Vash obliviously smiled at you, waiting for your response.

What if he said no?

With that singular thought, that singular worry that ran through your head once again, you choked. Nope, you couldn't do this.

You felt your heart beat against the walls of your chest alongside the loud environment and it felt...overwhelming. You should’ve done this another time.

The wooden chair scratched across the floor behind you as you shot up from your seat, making Vash jump a little "Actually Vash, I actually wanted to show you something I learned!” You fake laughed, taking a few steps back "But I just think it's bad timing maybe if I could just go outside to think about it-" Fumbling over your words, you hadn't completely taken in your surroundings when suddenly, you felt your back bump into one of the servers.

And with a scream, the server flew backwards and straight into the nearby table, flipping everything onto the...Very burly men sitting around it.

oops…

"HEY!" One of them hollered at you as you threw your hands up in surrender, the bar shushing down as the rest of the men began to spit out threats like venom.

"Woah woah woah! Hey guys, can't we all calm down and just chat? Haha? Maybe my friend here could show you a few tricks she just learned!" Vash intervened, putting a hand on your shoulder as he pulled you back behind him, putting his own body infront of you. Sweat starting to run on his forehead, he gave you one last nervous smile, teeth baring out “Right?”

Definitely not.

As if everything froze, the saloon had gone as silent as a library after Vash's remark.

Ohhh you fucked up...

Big time.

It was until the sudden shout of "Bar Fight!" had run through the room that you snapped out of your daze, realizing someone move faster than you had.

Vash took the opportunity to quickly turn and tackle you down to the ground just in time to dodge various glass bottles that had been heading your way.

"Gotcha!" Vash breathed out, pushing a wooden table down so that the both of you could take cover from the mess that was amping up at every second. The screams, yells and things breaking had made you put your hand over your mouth and listen in horror at the mess you had just created because of your last minute attempt to run away.

"Vash I'm so sorry oh my god.." You cried out from beside him as he gave you a nervous laugh "It's really no problem- GYAH!" He screamed, throwing himself forwards whilst pulling you along to avoid the body of a heavy-weight bounty hunter that had almost been thrown into you guys.

"LIKE I WAS SAYING, THERES NOT REALLY ANY PROBLEM! WE BOTH KNOW THIS IS THE KIND OF TROUBLE I ALWAYS FALL IN!" He yelped as you hurridly crawled to the next table for cover, Vash following behind.

"WHAT DID YOU REALLY WANNA SAY? AT THE TABLE?!" He loudly asked as you snapped your red face to him.

Crap.

Can't escape it now can you?

“I LIKE YOU!” You blurted out over the noise, catching him off guard "But! But uh! Not like the regular kinda like ya know!? More like a like-like? More like you make my stomach flutter and-" You continued to jumble your thoughts out as they zipped through your mind at the speed of light.

Fight or flight? HELL FLIGHT!

Pulling yourself up from the floor and onto your feet, you looked back down at Vash without thinking “IT'S OKAY IF YOU DON'T-"

"WATCH OUT!"

//

By the end of the day, everything worked out! Uh...Kinda.

"Ow ow ow..." You groaned, trying to lean away from Vash as he wiped the dirt off from the bump on your forehead.

"Hey don't lean away from me~"

This felt familiar didn’t it?

Well, besides getting hit with a metal serving pan square in the head, the both of you were able to get out of that hell hole without any other big injuries besides from your dignity.

And you made a big note to yourself currently sitting on the saloon steps, to never go into a saloon again.

Of course you had to make such a mess whilst just trying to confess your love to someone, it just had to be your luck! Maybe that was what Wolfwood was rubbing off on you!

You tried your best to avoid Vash's peering eyes as the tips of his fingers caressed your forehead, causing goosebumps to run up your shoulders "I never gave you an answer did I?" He pondered. And before you knew it, you felt a quick sting of pressure on your forehead and right on the bump, both hands of his gentle with holding the sides of your cheeks.

"V-Vash!?" You gaped out as he backed away, the blush on his face mimicking your own as he rubbed the back of his neck with his hand "You really had a man's heart pumping with what you said back there! It might have not been as pretty with, uh ya know..” He wiped the bump on your forehead with his thumb “But I’ll always say yes, even if you confessed to me in the deserts or in space..”

You stifled your laugh “Oh really?”

“Definitely.”

The sun had begun to set orange and yellow, illuminating the back of Vash’s body and thinking about it, you hadn't regret all those feelings, or this chaotic moment with him.

It felt like a mental photo that you had taken as those bright blue eyes shined adoringly at you as you couldn't help but break out into giggles.

“You beat me to it though…” He chuckled as he got up and offered his hand down to you. "How does breakfast sound? Maybe I could..confess my love to you in donuts?”

“Well don’t mind if I do~”

Breakfast sounded perfect.

[zee-has-commitment-issues]

20 questions for fic writers

Hey!!! Thank you @itsmadreia for tagging me! 💜

How many works do you have on Ao3?

28!

What's your total Ao3 word count?

565,230 and counting

What fandoms do you write for?

Just Young Royals at the moment, but I beta for other fandoms so I wouldn’t be opposed to also writing for other fandoms.

Top five fics by kudos:

1. Simon Eriksson: Just Some Guy From Biology (2,243)

2. Screwed (1,894)

3. Simon Eriksson: Not Really Just Some Guy (1,140)

4. Love Bites (1,118)

5. You Have Reached The Voicemail Box Of… (1,014)

Do you respond to comments?

I do my best! Sometimes I miss one or someone has commented on the same chapter like 5 times and I don’t want to spam them so I just reply all in one, but I do my best to respond to every comment!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The Last Time was absolutely the angstiest ending I ever wrote and it wasn’t even a Wilmon fic. It was about fucking Nilcent.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics end in happy endings so I don’t know how to pick just one!

Do you get hate on fics?

Only once and it was someone who made fun of me for making a grammatical mistake in my second language.

Do you write smut?

Actually yes now. Which is wild because six months ago I would have told you never in a million years and then I realized Reckless Abandon needed a sex scene for the plot. And now I’ve written 2 smut scenes? 3? Who’s counting?

Craziest crossover:

Not my fic, but I helped put Simon into @the-navistar-carol ‘s Top Gun fic Aftershocks!

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not a whole fic, but a good portion of the third chapter of screwed got put into someone else’s fic word for word and they thought no one was going to notice 😭

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not translated, but turned into a podfic!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not exactly, but Dani and I help each other work out scenes quite a lot. Sometimes we’ll send each other a document and be like “I don’t know what to do please help”

All time favourite ship?

Wilmon! Although I do love writing some nilcent angst

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I had a dark fic but it was a thought before s2 and it was way too much work. Highly ambitious, very cool, but not doable with my current mental capacity.

What are your writing strengths?

I’ve been told I’m very good at characterizations. I’m really glad people feel that way.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Fucking grammar.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I don’t care really. I like to use it sometimes, mostly for terms of affection. It’s fun to throw it in every once in a while, see who’s paying attention lmao.

First fandom you wrote in?

Divergent lmao

Favorite fic you've written?

It’s impossible to pick just one, but I think I really loved the process of writing Reckless Abandon and Screwed the most out of them. Probably because they took the longest and I got to watch them grow in front of me.

No pressure tags: @the-navistar-carol @insomnaticwriter @allthefakepeople

[anonslimes]

Punching a bucket over and over again until everything is okay but it’s not

Description: “I don’t understand how he could just….do that. It’s utterly ridiculous. Stanley that bastard. Oh how I hate him. Always wanting to have control and apparently thinking that getting rid of me makes that possible. But no, he needs to understand that he needs me. No one else will protect him like I will. No one. Really what was he thinking? That he can just toss me away. That he can abandon me here? Thinking he can do it on his own? Hah. He might just be crazy. I know one thing, I’m not crazy. In, fact I’m far from it in fact I-“ or exactly what the title says! We

Tags: The Stanley Parable, Tsp Narrator, Tspud bucket, mentions of Stanley, Short fanfic, Angst, Physical Violence?

Author’s note: This is based off of a roleplay with me and my friends where the Narrator gives the silly bucket the ability to talk. The Narrator is in physical form for this story and he can look like whoever you want. The context is that Narrator is handed the reassurance bucket by Stanley before Stanley runs into the skip button building and presses the skip button before the Narrator can stop him. This is around the final few skips where the Narrator is present. Apologies for any grammatical errors.

The narrator looked at the building once again. The door had long since disappeared so there was no way of telling if Stanley was even conscious. Was it worth noting? Time didn’t feel relevant anymore so he hadn’t kept track of it.

However, he had taken a lot of time to reflect on his thoughts, on everything that had happened. And his thoughts were mostly filled with a burning anger that made him want to set fire to the world. Then after spending about four hours ranting about it out loud he would calm down and go back to looking at that building as if somehow Stanley would teleport back out.

“I don’t understand how he could just….do that. It’s utterly ridiculous. Stanley that bastard. Oh how I hate him. Always wanting to have control and apparently thinking that getting rid of me makes that possible. But no, he needs to understand that he needs me. No one else will protect him like I will. No one. Really what was he thinking? That he can just toss me away. That he can abandon me here? Thinking he can do it on his own? Hah. He might just be crazy. I know one thing, I’m not crazy. In, fact I’m far from it in fact I-“

“Oh my god, shut the fuck up!” The bucket yelled out in frustration.

This made the Narrator stop his ramble and glare at the metal thing. He disliked that bucket. No, he hated that bucket. He wished he had never made that mistake. He wanted to wipe it off of the face of his story.

“Silence you thing. You know what you are? You are a bucket. Just a damn bucket! I don’t have to listen to an object that will never be good enough for anything more than transporting liquids!” The Narrator snapped

“Hah, that’s bullshit! I have brought more joy and comfort to Stanley than you could have ever imagined. In fact I bet I make him happier that you do” The bucket replied

“I made you, I gave you to Stanley. Without me you would have meant nothing! So what if Stanley enjoyed your comfort? That was your purpose! But Stanley’s not here, so you are useless right now, absolutely useless” The Narrator could feel his face turning red.

“Tell me, Narrator, does Stanley even like you? Really think about it. You have always given him every reason to despise you, in fact, that’s probably why he left you here in the first place. I was probably just a distraction so he could run and leave you here to rot and die. That’s what I would have done. That’s what anyone with a brain would have done. You’re a selfish man who likes making others suffer for your enjoyment. You would be a mess without Stanley’s attention. Stanley is too good for you. You are not enough for him. I hope someday you realize this and go burn in hell you piece of sh-“

The narrator slammed his fist so hard into the bucket that he could hear the metal being twisted. When he pulled his hand back he could see the large dent he had created. His mouth itched to apologize but then he had a realization. He didn’t need to apologize, he didn’t need to do anything. Stanley wasn’t there. Right now, it was just him and the bucket.

So he punched it again, and again, and again. Punching it over and over again as a sadistic spread across his face. It felt good, it felt so good just to let it out. Not having to simply tolerate it and move on. Here, in this very moment, he was in control. And he loved it.

Soon he tired himself out and the bucket was starting to bend into another shape so he simply just plopped himself down and laid on the ground. He looked up into the sky, the clouds were as grey as he felt. This was his memory zone after all.

He closed his eyes, and it started to rain. The water fell onto his face and mixed in with the tears coming from his eyes. Here in this very moment, He was alone. And he was scared. “The end…is never the end…is never the end….” The narrator began saying it over and over and over…

[koushisatori]

All you have to do is ask

It’s me again! This isn’t beta-read yet, but I’ll do so tomorrow after lunch!! But i need to get this out of my drafts asap and...well, here you go!!  Edit: 16.11.,13:10: I beta’ed it now and weeded out dumb mistakes (and made new ones, probably ) !  ♡ ～('▽^人)  

oikawa x f!reader

genre: small bit of angst, fluff

warnings: someone kinda trying to force themselves onto you??

word count: 3.4k

note: this was supposed to be a drabble, now look at what it turned out to be </3</blockquote>

____________________________________________________

Tooru was sure that he had saved at least thousands of people in his last life to deserve you liking him back

you didn’t play ‘’unreachable’’ but he had to out in some work for you

especially with his fan club being all over him all the damn time, 

but you never gave him any reason to doubt your intentions with him which is why he took wooing you very seriously

both of you actually spend a lot of time by just talking and getting to know each other due to that

for example: he liked taking you on cute little and spontaneous dates on volleyball-free afternoons and would then walk you home after

or on lunch breaks that you (at first) spend with him alone 

(sometimes he waits at your classroom door to pick you up if it’s manageable for him - aka if he’s not swarmed by people with confession letters)

later you both are consequently joined by Iwa, Mattsun, and Makki 

the last two loved teasing him with their ‘fun facts for lunch’

’’(Y/N)?’’ you hear Makki sing even before you can see any of the other three. next to you, Tooru groans in advance 

’’Did you know that ‘Kawa can reach a g’’ as soon as he’s eye to eye with an insect larger than your pinky finger?’’ the strawberry haired boy says, mattsun next to him wagging his eyebrows 

the professional that you are easily suppresses a grin, you merely chuckle amused 

’’Who isn’t afraid of bugs larger than that? There are way smaller things that could kill you!’’ you exclaim with wide eyes ‘’...and I’ll gladly channel all my bravery and…’’ you look around before leaning forward, the two boys following your example, intrigued by the secretive expression on your face ‘’…annihilate everything and everyone that might scare Tooru or make fun of hi’’ – ‘’WOAH, (Y/N)-‘’

they had tried to flirt with you just to fuck with Oikawa (so with no real intention) but they had to realize rather quickly that this was a hopeless task – you couldn’t tell that people were flirting with you unless they spelled it out

(literally that one meme;   you: ’’were you flirting with me, Tooru?’’ Tooru: did for the past half-year, thanks for noticing tho <3’’)

Don’t worry you know the setter well enough by now to be able to tell when he does, and really - only Tooru’s flirting matters to you

it also makes you blush furiously, now that you truly get it, but we’re not talking about that

Iwaizumi took you to the side one day while you were waiting for Oikawa to finish his training

he asked you sternly if you were sure that you would be able to handle days, weekends, and sometimes weeks in which Tooru would unintentionally prioritize Volleyball over you

said, that you had to find a balance on the fine line that was leaving him be with his training and stopping him from overexertion (and really ruining his knee)

after assuring that yeah, you would because you genuinely liked him, volleyball obsession and all, and that wanted to be with him, Iwa let go of any rest reservations he had had against you and joined the general teasing

Okay, moving on

as soon as his and your interest in each other became clear, you kept a clear distance from other males (and females, ‘yer that desired, as you should btw)

if they pushed it, you unmistakable stated that you’re not interested in other advances because you liked someone

Like??? Oikawa really just had to say the magic words at this point, you'd say yes in an instant

for god's sake tf is he waiting for?!!

despite you being obvious with your interest in the setter and disinterest in everyone else regarding this you constantly get approached by admirers

some people need it spelled out that you mean what you say, honestly

A thing Tooru liked so much about you was your kindness, but it also was the reason that - as already said - some people still thought they might have a chance

it’s not your fault, your natural charm is like...the 8th wonder of the world!!

due to your impeccable behavior and perfect grades, you obviously were the teachers’ favorite student to pick to help out other students

cue to: oh, look!! you're chosen again *sigh*

up until now, the tutoring never bugged Tooru too much, it was more like an itch he couldn’t scratch

but usually, they weren’t after school (giving up your lunch break, you’re a hero) and never awoke any rumors

your latest ’student’ seemed to think that he was close to ’’winning you over’’, though, that you were secretly but undeniably head over heels for him by now

’’I’ve heard that he plans on asking (Y/N) out today!’’ - ‘’No way! Even with Oikawa-Senpai obviously being interested in her?’’ - ‘’Yes!’’ - ‘’Death wish~’’

Tooru had to hear it in between classes and while he trusted you (and the last comment made him chuckle a bit), this was not the case for that guy

You: go home after class, Tooru, I need to give another tutoring session :(

of course, he wanted to hear none of that, especially with the hushed words fresh in his mind

meanwhile, you vividly imagined his annoyed expression reading it and the cute little huffing sound; you couldn’t help but smile softly to yourself </3

Tooru Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→: I’ll wait for you, (Y/N)-chan, Iwa-chan and me wanted to try out something anyway (^.~)☆

Tooru Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→: also, I waited to try out the sweets at the patisserie for too long to not eat my weight in cake twice today, so you better hurry if you want me to share with you

His answer clearly stating: I will wait for you, don’t take too long

Okay, maybe he was a bit jealous 

that this guy gets a reward – another hour with you alone - for being stupid ?? it obviously fed into a crazy fantasy and it was unfair

Oikawa reminded himself that he had no reason to be jealous, especially since he had yet to ask you out and make it official

(it had to be perfect and cute just like you, okay? no rom-com was able to prepare him for the real thing!!)

training – for the first time in years – dragged on endlessly

his mind kept wandering, and after the first 5 volleyballs to the head, courtesy of a very annoyed Iwaizumi, said one took matters into his own hands dragging his sulking best friend out of the gym

‘’If you’re jealous, Shittykawa, then fucking confess already.’’ Iwaizumi says with his no-bullshit voice, letting go of Tooru's jacket. 

While it was obvious that Oikawa is, in fact, super fucking jealous, he chuckles and puts on an easy smile. ‘’Silly Iwa-chan! I’m not- OUCH!’’ The brunet yelps, holding the back of his head and looking at his childhood friend with a pout. 

‘’First of all, fuck you, Shittykawa, for thinking I’m falling for your dumb act.’’ The ace growls, narrowing his eyes. ’’(Y/N) is a beautiful girl. Of course, Extras try to get close to and confess to her, you morron.’’ The spiky-haired let’s out a tsk-sound, seeing Tooru’s wide eyes. ‘’I at least hope you are aware that she is waiting for you to ask her out officially, right? It’s literally on you to put your foot over the line between a girl friend and your girlfriend. But if you take too long, she’ll eventually be fed up with waiting…so why in hell are you stalling?’’ Iwaizumi huffs, crossing his buff arms over his chest.

With a shrug, Oikawa looks up to the sky before his gaze travels down to settle on his feet, shuffling from side to side. ‘’I’m scared that making it official will do more harm than good, Hajime. She never said something else but…is she really fine with me forgetting basic things over Volleyball? Or will she leave me after a while like my last girlfriend? Because she realized Damn, he’s really into volleyball. I also don’t want to hurt (Y/N) by asking her to be mine and then…being me and screw everything up again.’’ Tooru whispers quietly, trying to hide the vulnerability while intentionally avoiding his best friends eyes. 

‘’You’re dumb, Tooru.’’ 

Well…that’s not what he was expecting Iwaizumi to do or say. A punch against his upper arm or chest maybe, or a kick to the shin – always with love but still painful enough to get the message across. But not a soft-voiced statement paired with a sigh. 

‘’I hate...’’ Iwaizumi says, waving his hand up and down. ‘’...why do I have to do...the emotionally charged pep talk.’’ He grumbles, pulling his hand over his face before he looks up directly into Oikawa’s insecure but also curious eyes.

’’You might not be aware of it, but things already are different compared to last time. (Y/N) does not just accept your passion, but supports you fully. With the amount of time she spends on the bench doing her homework and cheering for everyone when we do training's matches, while remembering our schedules and matches, she’s practically an inofficial second manager. By any means, she’s a perfect match to your madness, it’s scary.’’ he jokes, thinking of all the small things you do for his best friend that - in the end - make him trust you even more.

‘’But…what might be more important to you right now is that you’re not behaving like last time as well. You still are so freaking stupid and overexert yourself…but you check up on her whenever you take a water break. If it's asking in person or sending her a message. You make sure to have at least two free afternoons where you spend time with each other, which is two days more than you did last time by the way. You have that stupidly dopey smile on your face when you see Y/N. I mean…nothing ever breaks your focus after you set foot on the field and yet here we are, standing outside because all you do is mope around instead of playing!’’ The spiky-haired player huffs.

After a moment of silence, Tooru cries out an ‘’Iwa-chan, you do love me!’’ while draping himself over his best friend. ‘’Oi, Trashykawa!’’ the other protests with a fake angry voice, yet hugging the other back for a second before he pushes him off nonetheless. 

‘’Okay, now move your ass, the pinning you two are doing is a pain to witness.’’ Iwa says accusatory before going back into the gym, leaving Oikawa to make a decision. 

Hurrying through the gym to the changing rooms, Tooru nearly makes it out unseen until Yahaba is half asking, half yelling from the other side of the hall. ‘’Oikawa-san, where are you going?’’ 

With a wide grin and his signature peace sign (it’s for his own emotional support here, okay, his nerves are killing him), the Captain turns around to announce ‘’I’m finally getting myself a girlfriend!’’ before he quickly leaves his hollering teammates. 

(Oikawa was quite sure to hear Mattsun yell something like ‘All of you! Pay up!’ and Kyoutani muttering an ‘I’m leaving.’ somewhere in his vicinity.)

5 Minutes later, the brunet looks through all the classrooms in the hallway you should be in, teaching a good for nothing that was adamant about trying to steal you away from him. Tsk. 

Right after turning around the corner, Tooru hears a dull thud, followed up by a soft gasp that made his insides churn uncomfortably. That it’s immediately followed by a low, deep voice doesn’t help at all with calming Oikawas heart beat. He slowly creeps closer to the slightly ajar door to the room with the treacherous sounds. The soft whimper following was unmistakably you, and his heart suddenly felt like it was on the verge of breaking for a second.

Should he turn around and leave? Perhaps Iwaizumi was right with you being tired of waiting for him. Maybe you were tired and accepted someone else? 

Luckily, a gruff inner voice growls – surprisingly sounding like his best friend – and mentally slaps him. You never gave him a reason to doubt your affection! And if he had to fight for your affection then so it be! Also, you wouldn’t engage in something inappropriate out in public. There was a 99,9% chance of him misinterpreting everything due to his own insecurities, and you being uncomfrotable right now. Unacceptable. 

With his resolve strengthened again, the setter finally takes the last steps over to the door. Standing there, he finally could understand the words being spoken. Oikawa suddenly had a presentiment of what was happening inside.

Meanwhile, you were struggling unceasingly. ’’It…it is flattering that you…that you like me, honestly!! And…there are surely many other girls that would feel honored to be confessed to by you, but I like someone else, I’m sorry. Please, accept my choice!’’ you say, damming your voice for shaking and underminding your own statement.

’’Ah, ah, pretty girl, it’s not nice to lie.’’ the guy in front of you chuckles. The usage of such a pet name makes you cringe in disgust. There’s only one person allowed to give you tese kind of names. ‘’I know you like me, too. You with your cute little blush when you talk to me and lingering soft touches-‘’ 

A scandalized sound of protest leaves your lips. You were just short of stomping your foot. ’’I did no such thing! I-’’ But as before, your words meet a seemingly deaf ear. 

’’I will be the best boyfriend a pretty girl like you could ever wish for.’’ Moving closer, the guy slowly backs you up until you meet the chalkboard behind you. ’’Come on, give in.’’ He murmurs, hitting his hand against the board next to your head, which forces a scared whimper out of you. ‘’I’m all you need.’’

Stepping into the room, Tooru couldn’t believe his eyes and ears,. The blood in his veins slowly but surely starts to boil. 

’’Please, let me leave! I told you, I am not interested. I am with-’’ You plea softly, one hand pressed against the guys’ chest to stop him from coming any closer, – did he really try to kabedon you against the chalkboard? - while your other was hidden from his view. Even though you were trying your best, the distance between the two of you was insultingly sparse, the guy making up for the lack bodily closeness in general by leaning forward enough for your faces to be separated by only a few inches. You could probably feel his breath on your face. Tooru really felt like punching the guy.

’’What’s so special about the pretty boy anyway? He has many girls running after him to choose from, let me have you. I’ll treat you better! I have so much free time and I would spend all of it on you. Let me take you out for a coffee, pretty girl, or dinner. Hm? I’ll prove my words directly. I mean…he hasn’t even asked you out! It’s unfair how he is keeping you on the back burner, stringing you along. To you…’’ suddenly the boy moves closer, lowering his voice to a sultry murmur ‘’…and to m-‘’ 

’’That’s enough.’’ Oikawa says, his tone icy, sending shivers down the other male's spine. You on the other hand… 

’’Tooru…’’ you whisper, relief evident, as you watch him move closer to you as fast as humanly possible. Yet you still aren’t able to reach out. ’’Please, Tooru…’’ 

Upon hearing your soft whimper, his brown eyes follow yours to your other hand, realizing that said one is still in the firm grip of the guys' right. At that a clearly dangerous growl leaves the usually sweet brunet. ‘’If you don’t let go of her in the next two seconds and leave her be for good in 5, I can and will break your arm.’’ Oikawa threatens with an overly sweet, yet terrifying smile, wrapping his own hands around the guy's wrist, blunt nails pressing painfully into the sensitive flesh on the inside.

With a hiss, the guy finally pulls back his hand. It allows you to seek shelter behind the tall setters back. Your fingers tightly hold onto his shirt while you peek at the other from behind him. ’’Aww, come on, pretty boy,…’’ he says, voice provoking, the words clearly meant to degrade Oikawa. ’’…let me have some fun with sweets over there, and when I’m done you can have her all to yourself.’’ To top of his words, he winks at you. 

With the way he had tensed up the first moment, you half expect Tooru to suit the action to the word, and really break his arm...instead, Oikawa looks the other dead in the eye, while saying ’’Hey, (Y/N)-chan,? There’s that really sickening wretched smell in here, it’s kind of painful. I’d like to take you somewhere nice, will you get your things?’’

You hastily nod and do as you are told while Tooru continues to stare the other down, keeping his attention away from you and using the slighty height difference to his advantage. The moment you reach him, Oikawa finally lets go of the others wrist, grabbing yours instead. You tug him to the door as quick as possible, when suddenly life found its way back into the other. 

‘’Hey, what did you mean?’’ he asks, half angry, half clueless. Unable to accept his loss. 

Oikawa turns back one last time, a smirk settling on his lips while his eyes twinkle with amusement. ‘’I said, that a mouth breather as pitiful as you are is a disgrace to be in the vicinity of someone as amazing as her.’’ And with that, you both finally leave.

(Y/N)-chan…are you alright?’’ Tooru asks once you left the school grounds. His thumb drawing little circles on the back of your hand. 

You nod before you eventually look up, worrying your lip. ’’Thank you. I…I was really scared. Even though I'm sure that he would have done something…something…’’ you swallow down the nasty words, shuddering slightly. ’’I’m glad you came to save me, Tooru.’’ You finally settle on, pink coloring your cheeks. Beckoning him to lean down a bit by waggling your finger, you softly craddle his face and press a kiss to his cheek. The blush becoming more intense now with every passing moment.

Before you can pull back your hands, though, his had already found purchase on yours, keeping them - and you - in place. Everything about this moment felt right to him. Maybe now was the right time. ’’Pretty girl...’’ he murmurs, assessing your reaction. (He notes, pleased, that your blush intensifies, and your smile turns all giddy. He needs you to forget about that douchebag calling you that. He would repeat it until all you remembered was his voice using it.) ‘’I kind of really, really, really want to kiss you right now…’’ He whispers, the warmth of his cheeks telling him that he was most likely sporting a blush similar to yours. ’’…Will you be mine? Will you allow me to hold your hand? To kiss you silly? To steal bites of your food and make up for it with compliments and as many cuddles as you wish? Will you allow me to brag about you being my girlfriend and force you to wear my jersey to all my matches now and in the future?’’ His eyes didn’t leave yours for a second. He enjoyed watching yours light up as if he had just hung the stars in the night sky, or as if he had made you the best present a girl could wish for. 

’’Tooru…I thought you’d never ask…’’ you say with a smile so affectionate that it makes him feel mushy and warm all over. And then he finally closes the gap. 

The moment your lips meet for their first kiss is better than anything he had ever imagined. It isn’t a firework exploding, nor an unbalanced fight of passion and dominance. Instead, it’s gentle. A loving flow and exchange, wrapping you both in a blanket of warmth. A bubble just for the two of you. He understood what Iwaizumi meant with different, because – even though this relationship just started – he knows, that with you he had found a completely new world of comfort and love. Being with you already felt like coming home.

[heizours]

A SECRET YOU CAN'T KEEP

summary. accidentally telling that you want to marry them one day

tags. gn! reader, grammatical mistakes may occur

cw. nothing but fluff, though lmk if there is

feat. ayato, childe, kaeya, diluc, thoma

AYATO.

Has already been thinking of marrying you, but kept quite about it 1/2

I think moments will come where Ayato will start to think that he really wants to be with you forever, and what i mean forever is he wants to marry you.

however he doesn't want the both of you to rush the talk of marriage, so I'm seeing him as a person who'll wait for your permission or will wait for you to bring the topic itself. Everyone expects him to get married as an obligation for a heir, but he sees it as a way to show how he's ready to take this relationship to another level.

You're not even aware that instead of doing what a yashiro commissioner should be, who knows he's probably sneaking away from inazuma to find you the beautiful ring in all of Teyvat.

It was night in Inazuma, as the only sounds making were the calm swirls of the wind. As the people sleep peacefully inside their homes, well for them but not for the head of Kamisato Clan who has been endlessly reading and signing papers.

As he heard the click of a door opening, he didn’t bother looking up. Not before it was you who entered it as you were crossing your arms like a parent planning to lecture their child for staying “late” at night even if it’s just 9:00 in the evening.

“Dear, I think it’s time for you to take a rest” you said, before letting out a sigh knowing that the blue haired man has a head that can rival a hard rock. You admire that he’s doing all this work for the sake of his family but sometimes a heir also needs time for himself, don’t you think?

“Hm? Beloved, I believe you should be resting at this time. Do not worry, I’m finishing this as soon as I can" he responded back with a hint of worry but also gentleness behind it as he continues to scribble.

The atmosphere between the two of you remained quiet after that short conversation. The longer you admire the man in front of you, the longer you felt as if your falling for him again, just like how you first met him.

The idea of marriage suddenly came into your mind about how you will be able to experience this moments repeating like a vinyl playing it’s music, as soon as the two of you are tied together.

You have sometimes imagine the life you will have with him after the two of you share your vows together, you weren’t that desperate okay? But sometimes people just have a common sense if their relationship with their lover will last until marriage or not, and you were people. As you were deep in your thoughts while admiring Ayato, you weren’t aware of the sentence that came out of your mouth.

“Have you ever thought if I will still be a part of your future?” you said, as the sudden noises of scribbling stopped and the quill pen Ayato was using, dropped to the ground.

To say that he was shocked to hear that from you was unexpected but the excitement and happiness he’s starting to feel that the both of you are having mutual feelings about this made it far from better.

He paused for a moment before lifting his head to look at you, and not long stood up from his seat before making his way to you.

The sudden realization, made you panic as you raised both of your arms in defense and was stuttering any reasons why you had said that.

“Uhm-...Wait that’s n-not what you thin-” you were cut off, when he suddenly bended down meeting you eye to eye, as his arms were placed on both the sides of the chair, trapping you.

“If you will still be a part of my future? Of course I had, perhaps....you’re proposing that you want to marry me then? Well, when do you wish to proceed my dear spouse?” he said, before grabbing your hand and placing a tender kiss on your knuckles as a promise he will make it true one day. After all he can’t also lie to himself at the thought of you getting tied to someone who’s not him.

The thought of marriage had also crossed Ayato’s mind countless times, and now that you had brought it in the table before him, it seems that the ring that has been planning to be very hidden in his desk will be used faster then he assumes.

CHILDE.

Has been overthinking of marrying you, so there’s a 50/50 chance he will take your words seriously. Accident or not, he will believe it .

As we all know childe is a family man, I mean we’ve seen it all considering that he has siblings and he loves and cares for all of them but with Childe's affiliation with the fatui and as a harbinger it can be quite dangerous.

The. thought about marriage will have to be postpone for a while since first he doesn’t want you to be in danger because of him, and second he wants to make sure if you’re really willing to face many challenges in the life of a married couple.

He loves you to the moon and back, and when the time comes you let your words get ahead of yourself, expect that he’s probably sending letters to his family soon that marriage is on the way.

The sun in Liyue slowly rises, and soon the townspeople were also beginning to start their own days. Some are opening their stalls, some are doing their daily errands and some are still in a deep peaceful slumber.

You and Childe were part of those population who are still sleeping in their beds.

It was rare for Childe to wake up very late in the morning, considering that he’s busy most of the time because of the work the Tsaritsa gives him. But it seems that today was an exception and he will make sure he is going to savor this early morning with you.

You were the first to wake up, and you find yourself sleeping in his chest. You looked up to see the ginger’s sleeping face, the slow rising up and down of his chest adding more to the ethereal beauty you are witnessing.

‘How can someone look this good while sleeping?’

Not that you were complaining about it, it just adds to the favoritism that you’re the only person who can see the mighty and bloodlust harbinger this calm and peaceful for once in a while.

You lift your hand, as it’s finger slowly approached his cheek that traced to his jawline and back again to cup his cheek, in which Childe subconsciously leaned onto the palm of your hand.

Letting out a quiet laugh at how cute he was acting, you weren’t even sure what’s happening in your mind right now. But before you can even have the chance to think about what you’re about to say, it had already went past your mouth.

“I will not complain if I’m going to marry you one day, if it means I’m going to see this face every day in the morning” you whispered.

Unknown to you, Childe being quite mischievous and playful as he is was actually pretending to be asleep the whole time, the moment you had woke up.

When you had subconsciously said those words right in front of him, he almost jumped out of the bed out of happiness, his heart started beating faster than normal and all he can think about was to propose to you then and there .

And before you can even have the chance to take back what you said, he snapped his eyes open.

“Really?? Are you for real? Do you mean that?” he asked, as his face came closer to you searching for any answer if it was a joke or it was real.

“I- y- yOU WERE AWAKE THE WHOLE TIME?” you yelled at his face, eyes wide like saucers and your cheeks dusted with light pink as he bombarded you question after question.

“Do you mean it?” he asked again, not planning to drop the situation.

Feeling embarrassed and flustered in your current state, you hesitantly let out a nod as you looked at anywhere but him. Childe who was staring at your reaction can’t help but also let out a blush as he lift your chin with two of his fingers before placing a soft kiss on the top of your nose.

“I’m glad were on the same page” he replied before hugging you in his arms.

If looks could shine brighter than the sun, well Childe’s mood that day could even rival the sun for days or even weeks. He even keep humming good tunes that it left his fatui agents scared yet suspicious at the same time.

KAEYA.

Would get shock because he isn’t expecting for someone to even consider marrying him.

Kaeya in his life had never thought of getting married, let it be even someone like you willing to be in a relationship with a person like him. If ever the thought of marriage comes across his mind, he wants the person to be you and you only.

He had been alone the most of his life, and you were that blessing the archons had given him so he certainly won't let go as amazing as you. Don't worry about your family's approval, I know damn well that they will love him so much and will be greatful for having him as their son in-law or a grandson in-law.

He's going to be lowkey desperate with the preparation of the proposal to the actual marriage especially with you in the line because he wants that day to be special.

Truth to be told, Kaeya wasn’t planning to continue hiding any longer.

But when he saw you having a conversation with Diluc that he can practically hear from far away, maybe eavesdropping a little on the conversation won't cause any harm.

It's not like he doesn't trust you wholeheartedly but Kaeya being Kaeya, he just wanted to see how do you talk about him when you're with other people especially with his dear brother.

"I don't see Kaeya as that type of person, but if it's with you then there's nothing you should be worried about [Name]" Diluc replied while his arms crossed, which was clearly heard by Kaeya.

The Cavalry Captain on the other hand was beyond confused by what he said especially when he had heard that you were being worried about something, something that includes about him.

'They won't- no they won't leave me or something like that, right?'

The more he thought about that, the more he's planning to just make his appearance known to the both of you but before any of that can happen, you spoked which caught again his attention.

"Well it's not like we've been together for a long time now, but sometimes I just can't help but think of what the future holds for him and I" you replied.

"But what's wrong with hoping we will get married someday, no?" you continued.

Kaeya.exe has stopped working.

Pardon? Did he hear that right? Or maybe he’s still a little tipsy from drinking wine earlier that he’s starting to hear things? Maybe Diluc was slightly right about limiting his hobby of drinking-

Nevertheless Kaeya returned to his usual composure before appearing behind you, a sly smirk appearing in his face but deep down his heart was beating fast and he was feeling mixed emotions about it, that he’s silently hoping you won’t noticed that his usual smirk was slowly falling apart with a genuine smile instead.

“Have you really fallen that hard, that you’re considering to marry me?” a smooth yet teasing voice appeared in the conversation you were having with Diluc, and archons forbid that the cunning blue haired man will forget this topic, or else he will always bring it up again and again, any chance he gets.

Reader.exe has stopped working 2.0

“huh- wai- kAEYA? hold on...if you were here the whole time then does that mean..” your words slowly trailed off, as you were still grasping the sudden situation.

‘oh god, what was i thinking? he probably thinks i’m assuming that we’re going to get married when we’re not even sure yet if this relationship will last long- aha the ground is looking very pretty to dive in right now-”

A pair of icy cold yet warm hands cupped your cheeks, snapping you out of your thoughts. Your head was raised and there you were, face to face with Kaeya who’s wearing the most serious expression you have ever seen.

“Well then sweetheart, if were going to get married then it’s you. If it’s not you, it’s not anyone” he spoked. There was a slight tint of blush appearing on his cheeks as he wrapped his arms around you, burying you in his chest to hide how flustered he is right now.

Well, it looks like he’s about to start the search for a ring now. A ring that’s only second to you.

Meanwhile Diluc, third wheeling the moment-

DILUC.

Has already been thinking of marrying you, but kept quite about it 2/2

When the relationship continues to progress and last for a long time to the point where the both of you are comfortable with each other, that's when he will realized that he wants to marry you. He would marry you because you're the person whom he can run to, the person whom he can share his past before he met you and the person who can see how vulnerable he can also be, hidden in the public eye.

I think he would prefer to be in a relationship with someone who will also be the same person he will marry in the future. He visions that in the future, he hopes that the person he will spend the rest of his life with is you.

He's probably thought about the exact date when's the wedding going to happen but kept quiet about it, he's maybe hesitating but he's got the spirit.

For once it was a casual day at the winery, and by casual it’s one of those rare day offs that Diluc takes from work and as bartender in the tavern. He sits there in one of the separate armchairs in the winery’s living room with a book in his hands that he has been reading for the past minutes.

Meanwhile, you were in the kitchen preparing for today’s lunch, you also gave the maids the opportunity to take a break from their work, as you’re going to handle the chores in the winery for the time being.

Diluc had already finished the book he was reading and he was starting to feel a little lonely without your presence near him, so without hesitation he stood up and made his way to where you are.

You, however failed to noticed the red haired man approaching you as you were too engrossed on making sure that you don’t burn the food you were cooking. A pair of arms were wrapped around your waist, startling you by pure accident.

Turning your head around, you found Diluc hugging you from behind with his chin placed on his shoulder as he looked at you before placing a peck on your cheek.

“What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be reading something?” you chuckled at his bold actions.

“Hm? I just finished doing that and I just want to be near you, that’s all” he mumbled, not long after he started swaying the both of your bodies slowly from side to side.

“Who knew that Master Diluc could also get this clingy?” you teasingly said so.

“You love it though” he replied as he swiftly turned you around and continued dancing with you, completely taking your attention away from the food you were cooking.

You wrap your hands around his neck, as he continued to hug you tighter, eyes closing and both of your foreheads continued to lean in to each other.

This are one of the moments that are barely displayed by the both of you in public, not that you both minded it.

Although as if your mind had controlled you on their own, you wondered how would it feel for this scenario to happen again if you were a married couple? You were too occupied with your thoughts that you began to speak, as if you're wanting for Diluc to hear it.

“Is it selfish of me to think that I have the chance to be your Mx. Ragnvindr?” you mumbled while your eyes remained closed, completely unaware of what had you just said.

Both of your eyes snapped open as Diluc stared at you with an evident shock on his face. You tried to create a reason to escape the situation you were in, but all you did was close and open your mouth like a fish, however you don’t even know how glad Diluc is to know that the ring he had purchased from Fontaine that was meant for you won’t go to another person’s finger.

“If you have the chance to be my spouse? Love, you don’t have to worry for that spot is yours to be claimed in the first place” he placed a hand on your cheek for assurance.

The romantic moment was interrupted when the both of you smelled something burning nearby. But if Diluc was being honest he could careless about it, he thinks he’s already full from the thought that you’re willing to get married to him.

Consent stage? done. Proposal? plan in progress.

THOMA.

The topic won’t stay out of his head for the following days, weeks or even months to the point he will be distracted.

Thoma knows what marriage is but the topic doesn’t always disturb him or his work. In fact he won’t be surprised anymore if the elderly will ask him again and again the same question “when are you getting married?” or “are you planning to settle down soon?”

It's not that he doesn’t want to but I think he’s that type of person who believes that the right time will come for him to get married and that also includes waiting for the same person whom he would see walking in the aisle.

50/50 chance that he will ask you instead when would you want for the both of you to be married, half of that is being a joke but if you’re bold enough to say you want it to be now, he’s going to crash.

Accompanying Thoma during his daily errands was always an adventure for the both of you. Not only that the both of you can finish it early before the day ends but it also gives the both of you to spend time with each other despite the busy schedule.

Currently the both of you were stopping by at the Komore Teahouse to rest and grab some tea, which means you can also see Taroumaru as well. It’s been a while since you last saw the ninja dog and because you love and adore animals especially dogs, it really means something to you.

Entering the teahouse, you didn’t waste a moment of grabbing the dog in your arms as Taroumaru didn’t make any complains about it. In fact the feeling is mutual between you and the animal.

Meanwhile Thoma watched the scene happening in front of his eyes, as he let out a laugh at how adorable the reunion looked in his perspective.

“Hey what about me? Didn’t you missed me?” he teased the said dog, opening his arms just in case.

Taroumaru jumped out of your arms before tackling Thoma to the ground which actually took him by surprise, and this time it was your turn to laugh as it was indeed an unexpected action from the dog.

‘he’s kind, helpful, very good at housekeeping, willing to protect you at any cost and loves animals. what else does this man have that others don’t?’

The thought made you genuinely smile as you question the archons how can you deserve such a man like him in your life. What more if he becomes your husband?

You shook your head at the thought but the longer you continued to stare at the them, the more the topic continues to bug you. What you thought was a whisper, had caught his attention in return.

“I wonder if we will plan to adopt a dog after we get married, sounds like the typical little family. Don’t you think?” you suddenly said.

He was frozen in his position after hearing those words from you, as a blush slowly began to rise on his face. At the sudden realization you slapped your mouth and jumped from the panic that you’re starting to feel, as he might thought you’re too busy in your own world that you had let out such things like that out of the blue.

You were too busy stuttering out unnecessary reasons that you hadn’t noticed Thoma was now facing you, with a serious yet determined look on his face.

“A-are you trying to tell me that you want to marry me one day? No no- it’s not that I’m disturbed by it. In fact it just gives me another reason why I should work hard, because that hard work will be needed for building our future” he genuinely replied as he took the both of your hands in his and placed a kiss on your forehead.

“I will be waiting for you to walk the aisle, my soon to be spouse” he continued as you placed your head on his chest to hide your flustered and blushing state, a quiet laugh passing by his lips to also hide the fact how excited he is for that day to come.

Did Taroumaru just witnessed an upcoming wedding? Yes, yes he did.

[dilfs-bitch]

Steven Grant X Reader - Innocent

Summary: You get puzzled when your innocent boyfriend says a bad word.

Word count: 1,403k (not sure)

Tags: virgin Steven, oral sex (fem received) mentions of Jake. Reader knows about Marc and Jake.

A/n: It took me two days to finish this and I feel like I blew it. Posting anyway because tumblr needs more Steven Grant smut. Sorry if there are any grammatical mistakes, English is not my first language and I wrote this with the help of the translator.

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__________________________________________________________________

You choked on the water when you heard what Steven just said.

You came out of the kitchen stopping in front of him, who was bent over and with his head down while playing with his fingers, as if he was ashamed of what he just said.

" What did you say? " You crossed your arms facing him.

" Don’t make me say that again, love, please." He raised his head staring at you for a few seconds, soon averting his gaze again. " Forget...forget what I said, it was bullshit. "

Maybe he was right, you should hear him. But rather it was Steven, your innocent, kind, loving boyfriend, and that in two months of dating never said a word as dirty as the one he just said. Your curiosity took over, who would have taught him a word like that? Certainly a very vulgar friend he probably met at work.

" No, who teach you that Steven? You got down getting at the level of his eyes, holding his face making him look into your eyes for the first time in the night.

" Please, I don’t want to talk about it ." You wouldn’t give up so easily.

You caressed the side of his face doing him close his eyes, enjoying the feeling. "It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me who taught you such a dirty word." He opened his eyes staring at you with a little smile. " But I want you to say it again. Can you do it for me love? "

Steven nodded and took a deep breath as if taking the courage to repeat the words, he opened his mouth then finaly speaks

" I...I asked if I can.... hum.. please, lick your cunt, love "

Your mind took a while to assimilate what he said, but your body reacted quickly, your cunt clench around nothing on hear him say those damn words again. You chuckled when you stood up, your heart racing when you realized it was finally happening, Steven was ready to have sex with you.

He followed you like a puppy when you made way to your bedroom, him stop at the entrance not knowing what to do while he tried to hide his erection. Your nimble fingers were quick to unbutton and open the ziper of your jeans, you were half naked, only with a white lace panties

"You didn’t have to ask" You laid on the bed, spreading your legs.

The sight of you like that made Steven lick his lips, he pulled his own shirt off now as he knelt in front of you shyly, his trembling and calloused hands caressed the inner part of your thigh, making your body goosebumps. You were gaping when he pushed his face against your covered cunt, the pleasure ran through your body when the tip of his nose touched your clit.

" You smell good dove, I can’t wait to know what your taste is" he muttered kissing, licking and gently biting the inner part of your thick thighs. Steven ran his fingers over your panties, the thin cloth becoming more and more wet, your body reacted quickly to his soft touch.

" You don’t even know what you’re doing, don’t you, Steven?" You smiled teasing when he just swallowed dry. "I can teach you if you want love".

" No, I know what to do to make you cum " His fingers rubbed your covered clit in circles, sending pleasure to all over your body.

The truth is that Steven had no idea what he was doing, had never touched a woman before. Even researched how, he still felt insecure, until last night when he saw in the headspace how Jake made women feel. He wanted to try it with you, just like your alter did last night with some random woman. Steven wanted to make you scream his name, cum as hard as all the times he imagined it happening.

You threw your head back to feel the cold air over your clit when he pulled your wet panties to the side, you choked on the moan when him licked one single strap with his tongue, your back arched as he did it over and over, his tongue runs up your wet folds.

" Fuck Steven.. Do it again, please " Him looked up you, doe-eyed, the confidence growing up on him, a cocky smile come up on his lips.

" I thought I didn’t know what I was doing love, Is that how you like it? " You nodded desperately, moaning when he sucked your clit.

Holding both of your legs, Steven started to devour your cunt, you started moving slow your hips back and forth, wanting more. Him let a loud groan when your pulled his hair wanted more of his mouth on you. Your stomach fluttering when his finger part your opened inner lips, making you roll your eye back when his tongue fucked your hole slowly.

" More Steven, I want your fingers inside me" You moan.

Hearing your desperate ask was enough for him to put two fingers inside your cunt and his mouth sucking your clit again, your hand made way to your breast, squeezing and the rolling your nipples on the fine cloth of your shirt, arching your back you let a loudest moan when his fingers went deep on you.

"You taste so good" He pulled his finger out. "Put your tongue out love ". You did as he said, whimpering when him put his finger into your mouth. Him bitting his lips and moaned when you closed your eyes sucking his thick fingers.

" Fuck, I’ll make you cum so hard and when that happens I want to hear moan loudly at how good I eat you out" You nodded quickly wanting to feel your mouth and fingers inside you again. Steven kissed your clit, opening your inner lips again and then spitting in your hole that clench.

" You're so tight love, sometimes I wonder if you’ll to take my cock like a good girl that you are" nodding you bite your lower lips, It was too much to see your innocent Steven so confident like that. The way he was speaking his accent stronger than it usually was, while he was on his knees, his breathhing getting havier, his forehead covered in sweat, his eyes don't leave your face, it was enough to make you cum, it would seem so inrreal, so erotic your innocent boyfriend eating you out that way.

Your stomach churn as his tongue darted out and licked right up your folds, your thighs closed around him when his finger starting moving fast as him latched his mouth around your clit sucked hard, your orgasm building, heat spreading across your whole body, your eyes full os tears when he crooking his finger inside of you, hitting the g-spot that made your vision darken as you moaned his name, your wall star to clench around his finger.

_____

You was trying to catch a breath, you opened your eyes when you hear a giggle from Steven that hung over you, your eyes widened as you realized what happened to seeing his torso and face wet.

"I’m sorry, it never happened before" You covered your face with your palms trying to avoid his gaze, Steven held your hands making you stare at him. "All right, I’m more than happy to know it was I the one who made you squirt"

You held the sides of his face, pulling his lower lips with your own kissing him, you run your nails over his back, him bitting your lips when you scratched him there, the soft moan come out of his mouth and his hips involuntary slowly grindind when your hand was up to his crotch.

"Maybe another time, seeing you like this was a little too much for me" he muttered holding your hand and burying his face in your neck embarrassed by cum in his own pants. You chuckle, he ended up making you squirt and now he was embarrassed by something silly like that.

" Tell me, who taught you such a bad word like that " You played with the wet curls of his head.

"Jake" He whispered onto your ear.

" Was Jake who taught you these bad words? You grabbing his face to facing him"

"No, I saw him in the headspece last night having sex and I wanted to try you"

" You’re a pervert Steven Grant, you know that? " You joked pulling him for a warm kiss full of tongue.

"Just for you love" he smiled hugging you and press another kiss to your lips.

[maarrgarr]

The Unknown Heir.

part thirteen.

masterlist of the Unknown Heir.

Gojo Satoru x fem! reader.

Synopsis: The reader returns after being gone for two years and leaving her boyfriend, Satoru, without giving him a reason. But now she doesn't come back alone.

Warning: English is not my first language, possible grammatical and spelling mistakes, some plot changes.

"Where the hell were you?" he asked you. You motioned for him to speak quieter; if Ryusei woke up, it would be a problem. "We went for a walk. What's up?" you asked, confused. Satoru sighed. "Go away and leave him," he said, referring to Ryu. You looked at him quizzically, but decided to heed him. It made you nervous that Ryu and he were so close, and at any moment your son might wake up.

It didn't take you long to get to the room, it wasn't very far from the place where you found Gojo, which made you think that maybe he was coming from there. When you entered, you closed the door behind you. You put the things on a table, opened the sheets, laid Ryusei down carefully, so he wouldn't wake up, and covered him up.

As you left the room, you came face to face with Satoru again. His expression told you that he was not at all happy. For a moment, you feared that he had discovered that Ryusei was his. "How could you even think of letting them go alone?" he asked. His face was almost five centimeters from yours, and you realized that his eyes were killing you. You frowned, not understanding what he was talking about. "What are you talking about?" you asked. "How the hell could you think of letting Tetsuo and Rumi go off by themselves knowing it was a special grade curse!". Your eyes and mouth widen. "No, no, I was told it was fourth grade," you tell him. "Well, it wasn't, Y/n! You shouldn't have let them go alone; they're freshmen! And as long as I'm not here, they're your responsibility." Your eyes filled with tears without you being able to help it. "Are they...?" you asked fearfully. "No, but they are badly hurt, and all because of you". His words were bitter and struck you deep in the heart. "I tell you, Gojo, they told me it was fourth grade! If I had known it was a special grade, obviously, I wouldn't have let them go!" you defended yourself, though inside you felt guilty.

For a moment there was silence between the two of you, until he broke it with a bitter laugh. "Why don't you go away again, don't you realize that we are better off without you? Go away, Y/n, you don't seem to have done badly anyway, in these few years you've already had a child. It doesn't surprise me anyway, you were always very quick for some things." As soon as he finished speaking, your hand slapped his cheek. "You know nothing, Gojo, absolutely nothing. I've put up with enough nonsense from you just because you're upset that I dumped you. Yes, Satoru, I left you, I left and I had a child. Get over it," you told him. You could see through the glasses that those words hurt him, but everything he'd said before had hurt you too, and you'd put up with enough. "I'm over it now! Don't think you're so important, Y/n. I haven't cared what you do with your life for years."

His words reached deep into your heart, almost breaking it. But, at the same time, he made you open your eyes. His words destroyed the little hope that your heart had: you two no longer had anything, he no longer felt anything for you.

"Glad to know we have something in common, Gojo. I didn't think about you either in these years, I was more busy with other things" your pride spoke for you. And with your eyes fighting not to shed tears, you turned away from him and you started heading towards the infirmary.

Satoru stood there, taking in what had just happened. Trying to swallow what you told him and regretting the lies he told.

TAG LIST: @jellykingsblog, @dummyf , @nyfwyeonjun , @lenasvoid , @yyxy27 , @staygoldsquatchling02 , @whoami-72 , @blackcatpandora, @descargueestoporgojosatoru , @iluv-ace , @mommasbigd , @guenievresworld , @idktbhloley .

[enemiesandlovers]

If you let me

↤ 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐏𝐢𝐞𝐜𝐞 |   𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭  | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐏𝐢𝐞𝐜𝐞 ↦

Pairing: Matt Murdock x female reader (no use of y/n).

Word count: 4,080K words.

Tags/Warnings: Some angst, flirt, fluff, tension, praise and slight smut.

Summary: With the bet you both made almost coming to an end, the winner will be able to claim a desired prize.

General Note: This piece is part of the Secrets and Papers AU I’m writing of Matt x assistant/secretary!reader. There are a few references, but there’s no need to read the others to understand.

A/N: Your girl got one of the best 100 results of the whole faculty so this is my way of celebrating🥳, as said in the previous tags this is a bit of everything but mostly fluff, enjoy!

English is not my first language, I try not to make grammatical mistakes, but if you see any is because of that.

Your mocassins click against the pavement as you walk between two brick buildings. An edged chilly breeze hits you, slapping your dress against your legs, and you wish you’d worn pants instead of your long-sleeved dress. 

It was this weird time of the year where one day the heat would rise so high you could feel you were living in the actual kitchen of hell, and the next everyone would wear coats and scarves. 

You're almost arriving at Nelson, Murdock and Page when a sound behind you makes you flinch. The breath you started to hold leaves your mouth when you realize it was just dead leaves siding across the pavement. You hurry up to the stairs of the firm and open the door, struggling a little bit to lock it, a pair of hands help you and you don’t have to turn your head to know it’s Foggy.

“Thank you,” you say once the door is finally closed.

“No worries. I see the wind also attacked you on your way here,” he gestures to your head. “Almost blew me away directly to Hudson Yards.”

Your hands immediately start to comb your messy hair, hoping it doesn’t look like a bird nest. 

“Wish I'd seen the forecast before I left my apartment.” You tilt your head to the kitchen. “What about some coffee?” 

“You would be my savior,” he says with a pleading voice. 

Smiling, you walk towards there. He had already confessed to you how your coffee was better than Karen’s. 

You deliver the first mug to Foggy, who drinks it a little too fast and spills a bit on his desk, then to Karen, who’s busy with a phone call, but waves and gestures a “thank you” as she curves her lips and gives you a thumbs up. The last one belongs to Matt, so you start to walk in his office's direction. 

Since you both started to spend more time together you always left his coffee for last, an excuse to have more time to exchange some words when Foggy or Karen needed you and you couldn’t see him all day besides those brief moments. 

You knock on the door, waiting for his response. 

“Come in,” he indicates and you follow. 

“Hey.”

You twitch your lips up as you see his profile. Matt turns his head in your direction and your previous smile fades as you face a visible cut below his right eyebrow. 

“Morning, sweetheart,” he greets, but you barely listen, leaving the mug on his desk, bending forward to get closer to him. The pads of your fingers fly to his forehead. 

“What happened, Matt?” you mutter, examining the small portion of the cut you're able to see despite his glasses. 

The corner of his lips curl up as one of his hands climbs on top of yours, his thumb draws soothing circles on your skin.

“Forgot I left one of the kitchen's cabinets open. The edge was a little sharp.”

You frown your brows at his explanation, remembering how mesmerized you were at how he perfectly moved inside his house. 

“Did you need stitches?” you ask.

“I’m okay, I promise,” he assures, taking your hand away from his temple and giving you a little squeeze. “It takes more than a scratch to take me down, don't worry about it.”

Concern lingers in your eyes, but you don’t want to push it more, thinking it might be something embarrassing for him to talk about. The least you want is to make him feel uncomfortable, or worse, offend him.

“Okay,” you agree. 

With his hand still holding yours in the air, you squeeze it in return as a response. It's then when you realize you’re leaning over the desk, your chest almost brushing against his.

A small blush appears on your cheeks as you pull back. It’s ridiculous, how you suddenly turn so sheepish at situations like this when you’re at work comparing it to how days ago you were cuddling on his couch, every limb of your body entangled with his. 

You turn and take the mug off the desk to give it to him. An imaginary scenario involving the mahogany desk starts to play through your head. The heat inside you burns, and embarrassment floods you at the way your train of thoughts suddenly changes from worry to desire. 

You shake your head, trying to gain some composure and scolding yourself, not thinking about how attractive he looks right now. 

“Here’s your coffee,” you place it in his usual place. “Karen needs me today, anything I can help with before I go?” 

Matt grins before taking a sip of it and it feels like an eternity passes before he speaks again. 

“Are you available after work?" he asks. Tease washes all over his features. "Maybe we can finish the audiobook so I can claim my prize?” 

So I can claim my prize. 

Claim.

 You shiver.

It's almost as if he could see what he does to you, saying things like that on purpose.

“The only one claiming a prize will be me,” you respond. “Your place or mine?”

“I think it’s my turn.” 

You nod.

“All settled then. Get ready to lose, Matthew.” 

You chuckle as you see him raising his eyebrow.

“Take your own advice, sweetheart.”

Your heart flutters as you get out. 

…

Hair whips your face as Karen and you walk away from the Bulletin. You hold the box of newspapers tighter against your chest, afraid of the wind taking it away from you. 

Beside you Karen snorts, shaking a plastic bag that flew directly to her arm. 

“Next time weather is this chaotic we take a cab,” she says, her cheeks red in frustration.

“Agreed, I know someone I trust. Next time I’ll text him.”

A tiny frown appears between her eyes and she gives you a curious look.

“Like an Uber?”

“But cheaper, he’s a neighbor.”

She nods, and you both continue walking until a store catches your eye. 

“Karen, do you mind if I go in to buy some stuff?” 

“Not at all. Here, pass me the box so you can shop easily.”

Inside, you hold a shopping basket while Karen walks beside you, passing every aisle trying to find what you thought the moment you saw the store. 

“So, I see things are going well between you and Matt?” your spine freezes at her words, and you try not to show a reaction. “The two of you seem to get more along than before.”

“Ah. Ah, yes,” you rapidly answer, giving her a quick look before taking a bag of screws you certainly don't need. Her blue inquisitive gaze scans your face and you know her so well to identify the look when she’s up to something. “Things are better, he’s not that polite-reserved anymore, it’s like with you or Foggy now. Definitely better.” 

You and Matt haven’t talked about your relationship, you don’t even know if there’s an actual relationship besides a platonic friendship with cuddles and banter, so you don’t wanna say anything that compromises him. 

“Yes, he’s a private man, but I’m glad everything’s better." 

The tone of voice she uses for the last word implies that, if she doesn't know more, she at least suspects it, but you don't let her inquire more about it. You know her and her tactics to make people talk without them even noticing, so you´re fast enough to change the topic.

"His cut looked bad," you blurt out. "It's not the first time I noticed, I've seen him bruised other times. Does he get hurt often?"

Her whole expression changes when you utter your observations. From surprise to concern, you almost watch her stutter her next words.

"Matt has a difficult life," she responds, and you catch a different kind of weight in her voice. "Yes, it's often. Foggy and I also constantly fret, but he's just so stubborn."

You make a face and she laughs. For a moment you think it sounds a little bitter. 

The palm of her hand sets on your shoulder. 

"In the end he's always fine, just some carelessness from time to time. Don't worry about it."

The blue of her eyes is soft, almost compassionate. You nod at her words, leaving the topic behind.

...

Matt waits a minute after he hears you knocking on his door before starting to walk towards it. He sensed you moments ago when you arrived in the cab of the kid named Manny, but he still has to pretend he's an ordinary blind man for your own sake and his.

He opens the door and greets you with a smile, stepping back so you can pass.

Matt catches the smell of your home besides your usual tropical scent.

“Weather is still crazy out there,” you say as soon as you’re in. Your hand grasps his, and Matt lets you direct it on top of your arm, where a long sleeve covers it. Cotton and polyester. “I’m wearing a sweater and still feel like I'm freezing.”

Matt runs his fingertips through the fabric, ignoring the sensation that gives him and silently loving the way you have adapted yourself to him. Showing him things with your hands so he can feel them, teasing him with a few taps of your digits on his arm, or rubbing the top of his hand in reassurance. 

There are a lot of things that you show him through touch, and he doesn't know if you do it on purpose or unconsciously, but he appreciates it more than you probably know, even if he can sense your expressions, your emotions, and your genuine feelings more than an average person could ever do. 

“Warm," he mutters, referring to your clothes. "But it makes sense. You’re always extremely sensitive to the cold.” 

“We'll need that cozy blanket of yours,” you suggestively say and he doesn't need to read your mind to understand where your thoughts are wandering. 

“Already taken care of,” he responds just before you step out of the corridor.

He senses you glancing at the couch already knowing what you’re looking at; the silk blanket already positioned, his mug and yours also prepared on the table with a trace of steam coming off of them. 

“You made coffee?” 

Feeling your bright smile makes him smile too.

“Well, you always prepare coffee for us. I should’ve done it before.”

You hurry to the couch and take a seat as he follows your trajectory to take his place at the corner beside you. 

A sigh leaves your mouth once you take a sip from your mug.

“Two packages of sugar substitute and three of milk, your verdict? 

“Just as I like, and my verdict is perfect. Maybe from now on you should prepare coffee.”

He chuckles.

“Wouldn’t be a problem,” he says. “Shall we start?” 

There’s a sudden shift in the air, Matt feels the tension that emanates from your body as you grasp your purse tightly. He holds himself from frowning, not knowing exactly what’s happening. 

“Before... I want to tell you something, but please, if in any way this insults you or makes you feel uncomfortable it's not my intention at all and the least I would want is…”

Matt stiffs at your previous words, a sensation of cold water running through his back as he pulls away from you. He knits his brows.

Were you walking away from whatever this was? 

Were you leaving him? 

 He breathes your name, heaviness in his chest. 

“…what is it?”

You bite your lip, opening the purse. 

“It’s just, I noticed before just like today how sometimes you came to work with some cuts or bruises on your face, and today you told me the recent one was caused by the door of the kitchen’s cabinet and…” he senses you starting to open a small packet. “and maybe this happens frequently, so I was passing by this store and thought maybe these could help.” 

You take his hands and place small objects on top of them. He caresses the plastic.

“Are these some kind of gum?” he asks, fully aware of what they are.

A sour taste appears in his mouth.

“Plastic edge protectors,” you confirm with a trace of nervousness in your voice. “I thought… maybe that could help.”

He swallows the bitter flavor, the one that makes him hate himself for the lie he told you earlier, how worried you’re waiting for his reaction to your thoughtful purchase. It mixes with the warm feeling in his heart as he opens his mouth, curving his lips a little, trying not to feel so guilty. 

“Thank you,” he finally says, taking one of your hands and massaging it with his digits. Matt senses you letting out the breath you were holding, the beats of your heart lowing steady again. He clasps the plastics with his left hand. “For thinking about me. I’ll ask Foggy to help me with these.” 

“Sounds good," you nod in relief, tension leaving your body. You take out your phone. "What do you say about ordering some Mexican food for tonight before we start with the audiobook?"

He tilts his head.

"Anything in mind?"

"A place called Ponche, Manny recommended it. He almost had a heart attack when I told him I ate Taco Bell the other day."

Matt laughs, embracing you.

"I guess we should trust him then."

...

Right after you finished the call you kicked out your shoes and made yourself comfortable against Matt's chest. Your head now goes up and down along with the soft movements of his breathing as he caresses your hair, carefully undoing the knots that the wild wind left you. 

It's a peaceful moment, with the blue and purple light of the neon billboard painting the apartment, the warmth that his body gives you, his stubble lightly scratching your temple, and the blanket covering your intertwined legs. 

"...feeling the barrel of the gun pressing against his back, William slowly turns. Sweat slides down his face, breath stuck in his throat as he finally faces his fiancée's killer. The one who already killed him months ago, driving him to the abysm of insanity. His heart skips a beat when a well-known blue gaze crashes with his brown one. His almost brother-in-law smirks before pulling the trigger."

"I knew it!" you shake his shoulders before standing up, pointing at the phone. "I knew it was Callahan, that ugly rat. I knew it!"

Matt can't see the weird dance you're doing, but he laughs from his spot on the couch. The narrator keeps talking, but none of you pays attention anymore. A small laugh escapes your mouth again as you walk your way to the kitchen, waiting in anticipation. You're leaning against the counter when Matt stands up, turning to face you. 

Purple washes all over him and you stare fascinated as he walks towards you with a flirty smile.

"Right here," you say as you impulse yourself with your arms to sit on the counter. He follows your voice and stands in front of you. Your bare foot brushes his knee. 

"You won," he whispers.

"C'mere" you demand at the same time. He lifts his eyebrow and grins at your order, placing his palms on both sides of your body while he bends forward. 

"Hum?"

"There's something that I've been thinking for some time," you begin with, staring at his red round glasses. "Would you let me see your eyes?"

The question takes him off guard, you can tell. But he nods and without saying one single word his hands abandon the counter and move to his head. You rush yours to grab them. 

"If you let me... I'd like to do it."

"Okay," he softly agrees, placing his hands on their latter spot as he gets closer. 

Your heart pounds faster as your fingers touch the temples of his glasses, you take them off slowly, setting them on the counter on your right side before rushing your hungry gaze to his irises. 

"Hazel," you murmur, your thumb caressing his cheekbone as you sink into the gaze that drops in your chest’s direction.

"It makes people feel unsteady. Because I can't focus," he explains.

You shake your head in disagreement. 

"Not me," you reassure him. "Do you remember? What do they look like?"

"The accident was when I was nine. I barely remember what everything looked like."

"Nine," you hum with a heavy sensation pressing in your heart. "So you don't know what you look like right now?"

He tilts his head, snickering. 

"Just that I'm a really good looking guy, or that's what Foggy said".

You laugh too, both of your hands cupping his face. 

"Well, he didn't lie. I’d bet on it," you grant. Your digits travel to his hair. "Your hair is dark brown, although sometimes I see a few strands of russet when the sun hits you directly each morning in your office."

He exhales some air, and a beam of gentleness appears in his eyes. You realize then that, even if his gaze is unfocused, his eyes tell more about him than anything else. Matt nods, encouraging you to continue. 

Your fingertips run across his forehead. 

"There are some lines of age here, surely caused by a lot of stress. But I think they make you look interesting, even mysterious. And here," your digits now combs his eyebrows. "These are somewhat thick, the same color as your hair, or even darker. Gave me a good amount of scares when you frowned at me during my first days working at the firm."

His lips curve. 

"Sorry about that. I was a little severe."

"A little? You intimidated me, Murdock. I even thought you despised me so much you were going to fire me."

Your mind rushes with memories from months ago, and you shake your head still incredulous at how things have changed this much. 

"I’ve never despised you, sweetheart. It's just... it's hard for me sometimes…"

You caress his cheek.

"Hey, it's in the past. You don't have to explain. We're good now, aren't we?"

"More than good, I would say" he grins, and you take this as your sign to continue.

Your digits travel up and trace small circles on his cheekbones.

"Your eyes are not just hazel, but vivid hazel. Gorgeous." His cheeks acquire a faint pink blush. Palms finding their way to your hips, he gives them a little squeeze. "Sometimes when we're laughing so hard your nose scrunches, my favorite moments with you are those ones."

With your index, you give a quick tap on his nose’s tip, bringing your face close to his so you can graze both of your noses. You hold his jaw with both of your hands. 

"Stubble looks good on you, gets me thinking how you'd look with a full beard. Even more attractive, that's for sure." You turn your face to his side, skimming his cheek with yours. The scratching sends waves of heat between your legs and you sigh, closing your eyes for a moment, moving your face away from his so you can look at his eyes again. "Your lips are colored, perfect proportion. When your smile gets widened your dimples appear right here. As I said, I love to see you smiling."

His hot breath caresses your face, and his hands, which are holding your hips tight, find their way up to your face. One holds the right side of your jaw, while the other rests on the backside of your neck. Your heart hammers in your ears.

"Would you describe yourself to me?" he asks gently. 

It takes a moment for you to respond.

"I thought... I thought maybe Foggy and Karen had already told you."

"I want to picture you the way you see yourself."

His words feel warm against your chest.

"Kay," you swallow. His fingers travel up to your hair, placing one strand behind your ear, he begins to repeat your previous touches as you start describing the parts of yourself he's feeling. 

When you're almost done, the pad of his thumb finds the scarred skin between your chin and neck. 

"And this?" 

"An old scar," you breathe your answer. The incident briefly crosses your mind, but you shake away the thought. "Doesn't matter."

He doesn't think the same. 

"May I?" he whispers in a husky tone.

You nod, mumbling a soft "yes" looking directly into his eyes. 

Matt lifts your chin and your gaze ends up directed to the ceiling, the hand at the back of your neck holds you as he gets closer. His breath tickles your throat, it feels like ages pass until his lips meet your vulnerable skin in slow motion. The pressure feels delicate and warm, and his mouth remains there for a few seconds as your heart slams against your ribs. A low whimper leaves your mouth before he draws back.

You look at him with dilated pupils, captivated at the sight in front of you. Your hands cup his face, bringing his mouth to yours. The first brush, just like the one before, is gentle. All you can focus on is how soft he feels, the taste of coffee you were drinking moments ago lingering on his lips. You pull away for mere seconds, staring at his eyes while the corners of his mouth start to twitch up. You mirror his expression and the hands around your neck bring you closer again, this time with demanding need.

There's fierceness in this second kiss, the flutter in your chest only intensifies at the way your lips collide with his. Matt licks your lower lip, asking for permission, and you don't hesitate on opening your mouth to receive him. The feeling of his tongue sweeping in, delicate at first, then fervent as you start to mimic his movements stroke by stroke. 

All you can see, hear and feel is him. 

You moan between small pauses while his hand dives down your body. He grasps your hip before reaching the outside of your thigh, massaging in circles as he continues devouring you. 

You're dizzy enough, fully drowning in the feeling of him all over you. His heavy breathing is everything you can hear besides the sounds emerging from your mouth, making your whole body tingle.

He groans when your legs wrap around his waist, squeezing it. You start to bend your back against the counter, bringing him with you as you clench your fingers in the fine fabric of the collar of his shirt, holding yourself into him without stopping from kissing.

Matt's lips abandon your mouth and begin to trace the path of your jawline, descending until he settles in your throat while he lets you pull him down with you. His thumb rubs your nape and you softly bite his earlobe, your digits stroking his soft hair. A sound lets out from the back of his throat. A growl, a moan, you don't know exactly, but it sends shivers of pleasure down your body. 

Just as the first traces of his tongue graze the hollow of your throat, the sound of three knocks comes from the door.

Both of you go rigid. You open your eyes and turn your head towards the sound of the delivery person saying the food you ordered moments ago arrived. Matt pushes away from you as he helps you to sit up straight. His hands are now on your shoulders, yours on his chest, trying to control your heavy breathing caused by the slight lack of oxygen. 

You both laugh, recovering from the giddiness. He cradles your face one more time, skimming your foreheads and brushing his nose with yours before stepping back. 

"In a minute!" Matt yells, and you notice his tone of voice sounds raspy. He puts on his glasses and gives you a brief sloppy kiss. "The loser pays."

As you watch him take his wallet, you place your palm on your wild-beating heart, getting you off the counter to get back to the couch. 

Matt reappears a few minutes later with a plastic bag in hand, flashing you a bright smile. He places the food on the table, sitting beside you. 

A moment of quietness passes before both of you start to giggle. You lean towards him, taking away his glasses and placing them near the bag on the table. 

"If you're comfortable with it, I don't want you to use them anymore when we're together."

He nods, cupping your face to bring you closer and leaving a kiss on your forehead.

"As you wish, sweetheart," he whispers, covering his lips on yours before placing your head on his chest, allowing you to listen to his heartbeats as he does the same with yours. 

Taglist: @ruinstark

[koala711]

I Still Love You

[(ex)Kaeya X GN!Reader]

My butterflies still fly because of you. I hope yours still fly for me.

WARNING(s): grammatical errors that have sliped past my radar, cursing, drinking(mild)

Words: 2.1 k 

-

The world threw a ton of curveballs at you but this one hurt the most so far. It was the kind that made the wound on your heart open bit by bit.

So, maybe you had drunk a couple of shots.

Maybe it was to ignore the tuff of blue hair on the other side of the room.

Maybe it was to help get rid of your thoughts and create a buzz of sad silence.

"Dear Kaeya Alberich," you thought to yourself, gazing for what you promised was the last time at the man across the room(it was not). "Fuck you."

It was only after maybe 12 shots(your tolerance is very high) that you decided it was time to go home.

In all honesty, you should've left ages ago as soon as you saw that beautiful sapphire eye from across the room. It would've been easier for yourself.

... Right?

You had to admit to yourself that you wanted to see if he'd notice you at one point during the 2 hours you stayed. That maybe your gazes would lock once more and you'd both realize that maybe that breakup... was a mistake?

It was just bad timing in the end, anyways.

You kept pondering to yourself outside of the house, ignoring the blaring music and monotonous buzzing of the light up above.

Well, pondering as much as you could. Your brain could only muster insults at the man and yourself. Something about taking a chance and why or why not you should.

You didn't even notice the squirrel that sat a couple feet in front of you with a tilted head as if it were saying "you're weird" as you stumbled back and forth at the entrance.

It's been almost 3 years.

You thought you'd successfully buried your feelings and your past with him 6 feet in the ground, but seeing him triggered something.

"(Y/n)?"

Speaking of the devil himself, here he was coming out of the Kamisato’s household where the party was being held.

"Hi," you greeted with as much of a smile you could muster. "Fancy meeting you here."

You were only able to meet his eye once before hiding your gaze again, retreating to the flowers along the pathway.

"Thoma and I were grabbing some food earlier and invited me to tag along."

You hummed, nodding your head slowly and fidgeted with your sleeves. 

"So I assume you and Ayaka are still close," he continued, glancing at the door and back to you. 

"Haha, yeah. She's a great person."

Even in your slightly dazed state you could feel the awkward tension between the two of you. You wanted to get out of there but a part of you also wanted to stay. Besides, it's not like you'd called Sucrose to come pick you up yet.

You could stay a little longer.

You looked at Kaeya a he leaned against the post across from you. His hair was surprisingly a little frazzled. In the time you've known him, he's kept up his pristine looks throughout the day as if he were in a movie. Hair perfectly kepmt, clothes ironed and fitting to perfection, and skin as clear as day.

Maybe the drinks he was taking earlier made him a bit loose.

"I didn’t expect to have found you standing here alone." He stumbled across his words, not wanting the silence to prolong. "I thought you'd left a while ago."

He noticed you leaving?

"I..." You chuckled, and bit your lip out of habit. "I actually don't know." But you did. "I was supposed to call Sucrose to get me but I... haven't."

“I see you’re the same,” Kaeya chuckled. You raised an eyebrow and turned to him, wanting him to elaborate more. “Nothing bad, I promise. It’s just that no matter how sober you’d find yourself after a couple of drinks, you’d forget the simplest of things like your shoes.”

Did you now?

You could barely remember the moments. Then again, why would you remember them if you were the one that forgot?

“Ahh.”

You looked away quickly, feeling the blood rising to your cheeks. 

Embarrassed and flushed is how you felt. 

You kind of forgot what it was like to have someone that’ll always seem to notice and remember the small things you didn’t.

“It’s getting late.” You pushed a strand of hair behind your ear and shivered. The cold night’s breeze was not being kind to you and your short sleeves. “I should probably call Sucrose.”

“You’re not planning to stay out here the whole time, are you?” Kaeya asked in disbelief.

“It’s only thirty minutes.”

“And yet it’s been less than 10 minutes out here for you and you’re shivering.”

“I’ll be fine.”

You slipped into your bag and pulled out your phone, searching for Sucrose’s contact. It was pretty easy considering how you don’t have a lot of friends starting with the letter S.

Suddenly, you found a bit of warmth surrounding your shoulders and torso. 

Your body lit like a flame and tensed as you took in that familiar scent lingering on the clothes. A little bit of mint with something else you could never seem to put a finger on. It didn’t matter though. It has always been your favorite scent.

You grasped the collar of the coat and pulled it more around you, doing your best to ignore his gaze burning into your head. Words seemed to pile in your throat as you struggled to find the simplest of words as your mind continued in its static mess.

“Thank you, Kaeya.” 

There was a small pause before he’d answered as he stepped away from you and back to his side of the entrance. 

Five.

It was five steps back. 

“It’s my pleasure.” 

Biting the inside of your bottom lip, you looked at Sucrose’s contact on your phone.

All it took was 1 click. 

1 click to call Sucrose and then Kaeya would be back out of your life all over again.

“Still think you’re waiting out here for thirty minutes?”

“Hm?” You looked at Kaeya, meeting his gaze that seemed to have never left you. “I-I mean I don’t really have any other choice if I wanna avoid going in. You know how I am with parties.”

He chuckled, nodding his head. “I’ll admit, it was a surprise to find you here.”

“Yeah, I didn’t expect to find me here either, but I...” You looked towards the flowers once again, shoving your phone back into your pocket. “I mean, I don’t really... regret going.” 

If summer were a person, it’d be you. 

“Why the hell did I say that?” You thought to yourself, stuffing yourself deeper into the coat. 

1

He breathed a laugh at your words that have both lit and fueled the fire to his bonfire pit of mischief.

“I couldn’t help but notice; you’ve yet to call Sucrose,” Kaeya pointed out in your episode of embarrassment. “Any reason as to why?”

2

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-”

“I don’t know what you’re implying, Alberich. As you said, I’m quite forgetful after a couple of drinks,” You quickly stated. “Now get rid of that annoying smirk. I can practically hear it oozing from your words.” 

3

"You know, I wouldn’t mind taking you home. There is plenty of room in my car. Wouldn’t want you freezing out here, now would we?”

You bit the bottom of your lip and took a moment to ponder.

This situation was leading somewhere, and that somewhere could be either reckless or cautious. The route you wanted was the latter, and it was the safest. You cannot fuck this up again. Not when the world has graced you with this chance.

"Before I answer that," you began, twiddling with your fingers. "I've got some questions beforehand."

"Alright."

“Was us meeting here really a coincidence?"

4

"No," he chuckled shyly. "Thoma may have slipped in your name when talking about the party, and I may have shown a little interest."

"I have my afternoons off after 4 with weekends off as well. How much free time do you get these days?"

A little odd of a question, but this was one of the most important ones you needed. One of the big reasons you'd broken up was because you guys barely had time together.

"There are a lot of detectives working under Favonius, but I usually get assigned the longer jobs with a good amount of time in between unless its urgent. So, I'd say a decent amount of free time especially because there isn't that much crime in Mond, you know."

5

"Okay then. Final question..." Your hand was tight as your nerves ran through you like crazy. There he stood, less than an inch away from you. You could feel the warmth radiating off his body in this cold night. "Am I the only one getting butterflies right now?"

You could no longer hear the music that had been blaring in the background all throughout your conversation. You could only focus on one thing as you waited his response as he stood right in front of you. 

Kaeya was silent, staying only a couple inches from your face. The butterflies in your stomach were going rampant at the proximity. So much so a little part of you felt like you were going to throw up.

His kind and careful gaze never left yours as he traced his finger down your forehead and to your ear, tucking a small strand of hair that'd been led astray by the wind, leaving a tingling trail on your skin.

"No..."

The two of you were silent for a moment before a short giggle left your throat, making you break eye contact and look down in embarrassment. The top of your head pressed against his chest and you could feel his heart beating like a horse in a race. 

That made you laugh once more.

You couldn't believe what was happening, and Archons were you flustered yet so very pleased.

"How about..." You trailed off, and looked up to meet his gaze once again with a smile. "We talk about this more in your car."

Just seeing the way your lips curl and eyes sparkle in the moonlight made Kaeya shy. This... This was just what he'd wanted and needed this whole time, just like you.

A second chance.

"30 minutes doesn't seem long enough," Kaeya pointed out, digging into his pocket for his keys.

Taking one step forward, he looked back at you and cocked his head towards the cars our front.

It was time you should go.

"Then maybe we can get something to eat on the way and sit for a bit. Any suggestions?"

You walked right next to him, pulling out your phone as you prepared to make a search.

"I've been craving some Sumerian food. Is there a place near Mond that serves some take out?"

"Ooh I know a perfect place! Lisa brought me to one a while ago, saying she'd always go there for her dinners when she went to the academy. I'll ask her for the name."

The two of you approached the car, continuing to make your plans for the night. Kaeya leaned over and opened the passenger's door, motioning for you to go on like he had many times before. Graciously, you accepted it and popped in, sending your last text to Sucrose telling her you'd be fine and that someone else was taking you home.

You sat there quietly, smiling as you watched Kaeya close the door and make his way around the front to the other side.

A ton of people say no when asked if they would get back with your ex, but your answer has never been definitive. It has always been filled with what if's and the things you and he could've done to make things right.

Maybe it was too hasty for the both of you to call your relationship off then in the difficult years of college, where the time you shared was bare to none. Where life decided to throw curveballs you couldn't miss and your temper was fueled by the lack of sleep and your patience dwindling by the second.

Maybe this time you could fix those patches.

Maybe this time you could both fix those patches.

You were willing to try, and from Kaeya's actions tonight, you could tell he was willing to try as well.

Hopefully things will turn out different.

[littlexscarletxwitch]

hi!! i have a request for florence :)

could you please do one where reader comes back from work (she’s a model) and shes exhausted so florence takes care of her; prepares her a bath, makes her dinner and gives her the best massage ever. then when theyre laying in bed they have a conversation about the future and how they’d like more than 1 child

sorry if its a bit long & specific🫶🏼

── ⋆｡ﾟ☁︎ 𝗶'𝗹𝗹 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗯𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗲𝘀

paring: florence pugh x fem!reader

tag(s): fluff, sfw, short blurb, established relationship, kissing, cuddling

warning(s): grammatical errors, unedited, not proofread, mentions of sex (but not really), want to have kids (?)

word count: 1,315

note: thank you for requesting this, Anon <3. I really hope you like it. Fun fact: I actually had to search what models do on their working days, so that was interesting. Sorry if it's not accurate tho, I tried my best. Also, I thought it will be funny to use a quote from Flo (lol). I'm not a native english speaker, so please let me know about any sort of mistake. Hope you enjoy <3

requests are open! <3

You were exhausted, to say the least.

You woke up at 5 A.M., hit the gym, had a cold quick shower afterwards, had breakfast and went to work. You loved your job, not everyone gets to say that they were on the cover for Vogue, Vanity fair and many other magazines. But you deeded a day off and, luckily, that was tomorrow. Still, you had to get through the rest of the day. You had a Gucci fitting, needed to go through a contract with your agent, had to try some hairstyles for your next photoshoot, and, lastly, you had an audition for Valentino. You didn't know how you made it out alive. But you did. 

Finally, by 9.50 P.M, you called Florence telling her you were on your way home. You tried to hide your exhaustion from her, but you couldn't since you were already extremely tired. Plus, Florence could see right through you, even if it was through a phone call. She knew you’d had a busy week, so she was going to do her very best to make you forget about how stressful it was. 

“Baby, I’m home.” You announced once you opened the door to your home. “Oh, hi, you big baby. How was your day?” You said to Billie, since she was greeting you at the door. 

“I’m in the kitchen, love.”

“Mmm, it smells really good. What is it?” You asked her while on your way to the kitchen. Once you got there, you hugged her from behind. You breathed in her scent and just that soothed a little bit of your stress away. 

“It’s your favorite. I noticed you were tired over the phone, so I wanted to do a little something for you. I also run you a bath, so while this cooks, you go there and have a minute for yourself and wash away all the stress you’ve been carrying this week, baby.” You smiled at her. You loved that with only hearing your voice for a few seconds she could tell exactly how you were feeling. 

“You are absolutely the best girlfriend ever.” You kissed her cheek. “Before I go, do you want me to do anything–?”

“Just go now, before the water gets cold, love. I’ve got this.” She winked at you. 

You made your way to the bathroom, there were a few candles lighted up and there was also a glass of wine. Florence was truly the best girlfriend ever. You did as she said, and enjoyed your bath, which you didn't realize how much you needed. You washed all the stress away, as she said, and immediately felt renewed with energy. After what felt like hours, when in reality was just half an hour, Florence let you know that dinner was ready. You got out of the bath, put on some comfy clothes and met her in the dining room. 

You noticed that she put on her playlist, the relaxing music soothing you even more. There were a few more candles lit up, there was more wine, and, as she said, she prepared your favorite dish. God, you loved this woman. You smiled at her. There were no words to describe how much you appreciated this. How much you loved her for knowing how to make you feel better. 

You both had dinner, Florence filling you in about her upcoming projects. She could tell that you didn’t want to talk about your work, she knew about everything you had to deal with this week, and she just wanted for you to forget about everything for a few seconds. You silently thanked her for even noticing that. She told you how excited she was for her upcoming film ‘A good person’, in which she had the opportunity to write her own music for the movie, and was extremely excited to see how everyone would react. You didn’t personally hear her singing the songs she wrote for the movie, but from time to time, you would hear her singing around the house, and you knew that her fans were going to love her voice as much as you did. 

After dinner, you both put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. She tried to stop you from doing it, but you wanted to do some simple chores that didn't have anything to do with modeling. 

Afterwards you guys decided to watch a movie in your shared bedroom. You both decided to watch ‘Just Go With It’, since it was one of your favorite movies. As soon as you both lied in bed, the movie already playing, Florence asked you if you wanted a back massage. 

“I don’t know, baby. You’ve done more than enough for me today, I don’t want you to–.” Florence cut you off with a scoff. 

“That’s nonsense, love. Come on, I’ll give you the best massage ever.” A smile formed on your lips, what did you ever do to deserve her?

You lied on your stomach, giving her full access to your back, your head facing the tv so you could actually watch the movie. 

Florence's hands felt like heaven. She wasn’t too rough, nor too gentle. She was just amazing. She successfully de-stressed your mind and your body. From time to time, she would put pressure on a specific spot which caused soft moans to escape from your mouth, which made her chuckle. Still, you tried your best to pay attention to the movie. 

Halfway through it, a thought came to your mind. Actually, you’ve been thinking about it for a while, but you were waiting for the right time to talk about it with Florence. It was something you two had never talked before, so you were a bit nervous about what her answer would be. 

“How do you feel about kids?.” You felt Florence’s hands stopped, but a second later they were moving around your back again. 

“Well, I don’t hate them. I think they can be cute.” You laughed at that.

“Flo, I’m being serious.” You turned your head to look at her.

She saw your dead serious face and got down from your back, so you two could sit to talk about it. 

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, haven’t you thought about having kids?” You were now scared, your eyes got watery. Did she not want to form a family with you?

“Oh no, don’t cry, baby. Of course, I have. I just thought you weren’t ready to talk about it.”

“Oh, thank god. You scared me for a second.” You sighed with relief.

“I would love to see a mini you running through the house. Or maybe a mini boy you.” She reassured you, smiling at you. 

“Oh, please. You are the one with the good genes. I want one with your cute little nose.” Her raspy laugh filled your ears.

“Well, in that case, we can have a mini you and a mini me. What do you think?”

“Umm, yeah, two is a good number. But what about a mini boy you?”

“Mmm, okay, yeah we can do that, if we also have a mini boy you.” She cuddled you, the movie long forgotten. You laughed, your breath tingling the sensitive skin in her neck. “I’ll have your babies, Y/n. As many as you want.”

“Yeah?” You were trying to contain your smile but it was impossible. 

“Hell, yeah. You know, biologically speaking, we can’t make a baby. But I would love to try anyway.” She trailed off, her fingertips tracing small circles on your thighs. 

“Yeah, I think we should try. Just in case.” You got on top of her and kissed her lips, her jaw, and her neck. You moved your lips towards her chest, a soft whimper escaped from her lips. Yes, you were tired, but you will always have enough energy for moments like this. 

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-M