#realistic strawberry cheesecake

[90smisaki]

cheesecake

[fairyofshampgyu]

Super shy !

genre: smut, baker au, college au, crack

Pairing: shy loser virgin bakery worker ! soobin x college customer ! reader

Warnings: sub soobin, dom reader, clubbing, loss of virginity, riding, hand job, titty groping (can’t be a Soobin smut without him being obsessed with boobies be fr), premature ejaculation,

word count: 2.9k

As soon as you stepped into the newly established campus bakery, walking up to the counter and observing all the pastries, contemplating for a rather long time before you end up deciding on what you’d usually order anyway, Soobin couldn’t help feeling like his world got totally turned upside down. The sight of you rendering him completely speechless and unable to even think.

Time seemingly going by so slow like in the kdramas as your shiny hair majestically blows in the non existent wind inside, smile brightening up the entire bakery. He could practically see the roses blooming around your face like in the mangas. Was this love at first sight?!

Realistically, no.

But were you incredibly attractive to him and a breath of fresh air to the moody, stressed out college students that purchase a single coffee and stay for hours completing assignments with their backs concerningly hunched over? Hell yes.

And unfortunately for Soobin, he does not do well with pretty people. At all. Not realising you had even ordered, too in awe and preoccupied with taking in all your features until he’s snapped back to reality with the clearing of your throat and he can already feel his cheeks burning up horribly fast. Oh god. He really, really hopes it’s not evident right now.

“S-sorry…What did you say?” He begins apologising profusely to you, too embarrassed to even look you in the eyes, staring off more to the side. This was definitely not his best customer service.

With a chuckle, you brush it off and state your order again, “I said could I have the strawberry swirl cheesecake please?” If Soobin could look at himself in third person, he would so be face palming right now. Or better yet, maybe he could just go up and like, punch himself straight up or something for acting like such a loser.

“Ah right... That’s ₩7500. Cash or card?”

You pay with cash and Soobin, very nervously, fumbles around to garner the right amount of change to hand you, though doing it in the most awkward way possible and his palm makes direct contact with yours as he hands the money, making him blush even more and let out a small obvious gasp at the feeling of your soft hand. Oh my god. Why did he do that?! He really hopes you didn’t find that weird.

You only let out another chuckle, thanking him before you’re leaving the bakery in an elegant manner and Soobin is left to sigh and watch your back disappear. Damn it. He’ll probably never see you again. You were so pretty and so cute, too cute even-

“You’re such a virgin.”

His thoughts about you are abruptly dissipated by his coworker and unfortunately best friend, Choi Beomgyu who gives him the stupidest, most annoying grin he would definitely like to slap off his face right now.

“Just shut up.” Soobin grimaces and rolls his eyes at beomgyu, bringing a batch of freshly baked cookies out of the oven behind him and placing them into the display glass one by one.

"You’re pinker than the strawberry macarons we sell. That's saying something." Beomgyu raises an eyebrow at him with sass.

So does that mean you could see how flustered he was getting then? Oh no! Soobin clears his throat and narrows his eyes at beomgyu anyway. “Am not.”

“Are too! Anyway, all I’m saying is that interaction was painful to watch. You’re really giving pathetic, loser, virgin right now. I cant lie.” Beomgyu attempts to stifle in one of his obnoxious laughs.

Soobin is quick to snap back, "You've only ever slept with one person!"

"S-so!! At least im not a virgin!" Beomgyu’s cheeks also become the equivalent to the strawberry macarons as he scrambles to try and defend himself, brows furrowed and cheeks puffed.

“Well, the concept of a virgin is purely societal anyway. It doesn’t actually matter. It doesn’t mean anything really.” Soobin bitterly replies, continuing to work whilst his counterpart does completely nothing like most of the time. It's usually soobin that does work, remind him not to agree to beomyu's silly ideas of getting a job together ever again.

Beomgyu scoffs and snickers at this, "Whatever. You’re just saying all that to make yourself feel better because you’re a loser. LMAO"

"I’ll punch you right now."

"Then we'll both be fired~”

A poor customer still awaits at the counter to be served, standing in bewilderment and tiredness. Waiting for the two bakers to finish bickering and sighing as they don’t seem like they’re going to stop anytime soon.

Soobin doesn’t expect to see you again, in complete honesty, he’s almost forgotten you even exist after you never come again. But he’s in luck and more than pleasantly surprised when he hears the bell to the door go ding!, indicating a customer had walked in. He looks up from the cake he was decorating and in comes you looking cuter than the first time he saw you. He tries not to mess up the cake and he stands up straight almost instantly when he sees you, waiting for you to order and trying to remain calm.

You laugh and point at his cute nose when you come up to the counter. “You have like, icing all on your nose.”

“O-oh. I do?” He points at himself and you nod in reply. He feels himself going redder by the minute. He must look so stupid right now! And he urgently brings his sleeve up and tries to wipe the icing off his nose to not make himself look an even more of a complete fool in front of you .

“Ah wait no. Let me do it!” You lean over the counter as you see him struggling and wipe it off the top of his cute bunny like nose instead for him.

And that was the end of soobin. The end.

-

You become a regular at the bakery and soobin becomes a regular of embarrassing the absolute shit out of himself each time he sees you. He really doesn’t think he can top the previous comedic disaster that occurs when you enter, yet he always proves himself wrong, the awkwardness reaching new heights each time. From dropping trays of pastries, spilling drinks, nearly slipping in front of you, giving you a ₩50000 note when it was only ₩5000 change, the list goes on and on. He’s actually surprised he hasn’t lost his job yet.

And there’s also always a disappointed beomgyu shaking his head afterwards ready to make fun of him when Soobin promises to make a move but freezes every time you’re in sight, too much of a pussy.

“I’m calling an intervention.” Beomgyu declares and sighs after the nth time of soobin making absolutely no moves on you whatsoever, “Soobin, my man, my bro, you desperately need to get banged. It’s painful seeing the way you act. Your little crush is not gonna like you with the way you act. That’s it. We’re going clubbing tonight after this shift. No buts.”

“But-”

“I said no buts!”

“You know I hate clubbing.”

“You’ve never even been with me despite my constant pleads.” Beomgyu shakes his head and makes a dramatic pained face at his way.

“So? I know I’ll hate it.”

“You’re such a hater bro.”

“Yes I am. And I take pride in it. I’m a hater of everything.”

Beomgyu just sighs. He was utterly hopeless.

Unfortunately, there was no way Soobin could get out of this because beomgyu was having absolutely none of his protests and excuses and that’s how he ends up finding himself at the club anyway after his shift, sitting off to the side as he watches beomgyu disappear somewhere into the crowd. Soobin sighs as he downs his jack and coke. This was going to be a long fucking night.

-

In the dimly lit club, soobin’s discomfort was palpable, like a fish out of water and you noticed instantly upon arrival. It’s that cute tall baker boy who always serves you! You excitedly make your way and sit next to him, he looked a little lonely. “Hey! You work at that bakery on campus. I go there!”

Soobin’s eyes nearly fall out of his sockets at the sight of you sitting next to him and he nearly chokes on his drink as he splutters on his straw and nods. Act calm, act calm, act calm, act calm. Act cool and mysterious.

It’s you! You’re speaking to him?!

“So…these things not really your scene, huh?”

“Gee. How did you ever notice?” Soobin attempts to smile and joke with dry humour but it executes a little more awkward and nervous than how he would have liked.

You also try to carry on the conversation since this is the first time you’ve got to ever actually talk to the cute boy before. “I’m very intuitive. I can just sense things like that.”

He laughs at that too, feeling a bit more comfortable around you now. “No but yeah, I’d much rather be at home right now sleeping. Can’t say I’m much of an advocate for getting stupidly drunk with sweaty people you don’t even know with terrible rave music and flashing lights that should have an epilepsy warning”

“I get it.” You chuckle at how passionate he gets talking about how much he hates clubbing, frown on his cute face. “So why are you here then?”

“Friend wanted me to. Said I needed to finally get laid or whatever.” Soobin rolls his eyes and sips on his drink again, motioning his head to the direction of beomgyu on the dance floor, clearly drunk off his ass now.

“Oh, you’re a Virgin?”

Soobin’s ears go red when he realises what he said to you. “O-oh um y-yeah I guess…”

“Are you waiting for like marriage or the right person or something?” You question, genuinely surprised. He was tall and very attractive and it was rare for college boys to not hook up every single night these days.

“God no. Just never happened. I don’t really care for things like that. It’s probably overhyped anyway and doesn’t even feel that good. Like porn is highly unrealistic anyway.”

“You think so?” You chuckle at him and he nods, continuing to cutely sip on his drink with his straw. “Well maybe you should to try it out first and see for yourself.” Your words start to become a little flirty as you grow more confident talking with him and also because of the alcohol making you slightly tipsy now. “Sorry, but do you want to get out of here?”

“Yes please.” Soobin’s eyes widen even more at your suggestion and he’s more than happy to get out of here with you especially.

“Umm your friend is a bit….out of it right now.” You watch beomgyu drunk from afar, whipping his long hair back and forth claiming to everyone around he’ll be able to do it fast enough to lift off his feet and fly like a helicopter.

“He’ll be…he’ll be fine I’m sure”

Soobin has no idea what good stuff he must have done in his past life to get to this moment right now, in your room, making out with you, in your bed. Did he mention making out? With you?! The customer he’s been crushing on for months?! Holy, he might hyperventilate right now. It all feels like a dream. Is this real right now?

You cup his cheek and move into his lap, continuing to move your lips against his and soobin’s ears and face are all flushed, breathing loud of enough for you to hear and he looks all nervous and a little shaky.

You stop kissing him but he chases after your lips still and you stroke his cheek, “Are you okay Soobin?”

He’s only able to nod, lips parted and eyes all glazed over. He’s so out of it just from making out with you it’s crazy. But so cute too.

“C-can you…can we…just want…”

“What do you want, baby?” You chuckle and stroke his cheek as he manages to utter some words. The petname only makes his head go even more haywire.

“W-want you…”

“What do you want me to do?” You giggle and coo at him.

He shyly shows you the boner he’s had this entire time. You can’t believe he got a boner just from some kissing. “Can you-will you touch me…please? Need it…” He pleads at you nervously, so red in the face.

“Are you sure?”

He nods his head exceptionally fast and you begin to unbuckle his jeans as he watches you take his flushed and hard dick out, breathing only becoming heavier. Damn, you didn’t think he’d be that big.

You take him into your hands and his mouth his already agape, gasping when you slowly start to stroke him.

You pump his big cock at a steady pace so as not to overwhelm him too much, though twisting and thumbing at the tip occasionally that has him drooling at the corner of his mouth and beads of precum dribbling out heavily from his cock. It’s endearing how far gone he is just at you stroking his dick slow, shy whimpers and other noises eliciting from his mouth.

You unbutton you shirt with your other hand as you continue to pump him and his eyes go crazed at the sight of your tits, you guiding his own big inexperienced hands to grope at them and he does, slumping his head into your neck and shoulder moaning into it and still groping and squeezing at your tits.

With a sudden yelp you feel Soobin’s cum spurt up and leak into your hands, his eyes rolling back as he whimpers continuously from his premature orgasm.

He doesn’t lift his head from your shoulder yet, too embarrassed to face you but he eventually does, eyes still half lidded, trying to catch his breath and he’s hard again. “W-will you fuck me? Please please please. Wanna feel it, wanna feel you, please?” He practically begs, still panting out.

“Are you really sure, Soobin? With me?”

“Yes please! Only want you.”

You study his face for any hesitancy but it’s clear he’s so set on wanting you to fuck him. So you wrap your hands around both his wrists and bring him to lay down on your pillows instead, you still straddling his lap.

When you’ve undressed your lower half, you bring his dick and slide it over your entrance a few times, he moans out loud, hands coming up shyly to cover his face and then you sink down incredibly slowly on his massive length . Soobin’s jaw drops and breath hitches at the feeling of his dick finally in your warm pussy, a strangled moan ripping out of him. He could seriously cum just from being in you right now, but he tries so hard not to or you’ll be disappointed and he doesn’t want to see you disappointed or embarrass himself even more.

“You good, baby?”

“M’ f-fine. Just-Just need a minute.” Soobin shakes out.

You take his hands away from his face and lean down to softly kiss him instead, trying to calm him down and he effuses into your mouth, kissing back passionately with his eyes closed.

“I’m ready now…” He pulls away after a while and looks you in the eyes.

So you start to slowly move, riding him, going up and down on his virgin dick. Soobin’s mouth hangs open in endless moans and gasps and whimpers, face buried into your pillow to the side and his hair all messy now. Whole body flushed and shaking underneath you.

“Better than you thought, baby?” You grunt out, bouncing on top of his cock.

“So much better. O-oh my god, f-fuck…ah!” So maybe sex wasn’t overhyped after all. Because goddamn, you feel so fucking good. Maybe it was just you. But Soobin truly feels like he’s gliding on fluffy clouds right now. All the times he’s touched himself not even coming close to how he feels right now stuffed in your pussy as you fuck him, watching mesmerised as your tits bounce with each movement. He could die here right now in full contentment. Oh how he was so wrong.

It’s not long at all before Soobin can’t hold it anymore. His hips bucking up and breath hitching as a loud strangled mewl tumbles out of his mouth and you feel hot cum fill you up suddenly that makes you still your movements on him. He lets out a long slurred groan and then goes limp beneath you, eyes closing shut and open as he fades from conscious to not every now and then. Is he really that fucked out?

After a while, he finally somewhat recovers and comes back to you from his high, still panting out and chest rising up and down. He looks up at you with a small shy smile on his lips, arm thrown over his forehead.

“You know I literally only go to the bakery because of how cute and silly you are and how you always make a mess of yourself whenever I walk in” You chuckle and admit, drawing shapes into his chest.

“W-wait you knew I liked you?” Soobin asks, shocked and feeling embarrassed again.

You laugh, “Come on, you made it rather obvious.”

Please actually reblog !!!!!! and leave comments !!!! guys 😭 if you like the fic. It’s really appreciated and so nice tysm !<3🙏💕🌷🌷! It’s incredibly discouraging and irriating when fics have such little reblogs ☹️. At least send an anon in the inbox if you don’t want to rb, don’t just like. Feedback is always appreciated it make writers want to actually write :)

A/n: having serious writers block rn but forced myself to write this in practically one sitting (it was so painful) and has not been proof read at all so if it makes no sense I apologise 😭

[burnmarksofficial]

꒰꒰ ‧₊˚𝐃𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐃𝐈𝐕𝐄 ─ 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐔𝐑𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐀 ˚₊· ꒱꒱

❨ series masterlist | request | taglist ❩

𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐒 ─

★ birth name ─ jae-eun lee ★ hangul ─ 이재은 ★ nicknames ─ jae, jj, jae-bear, jennington, lilo

★ birthday ─ 5th november 2003 ★ age ─ 20 (int.) 21 (kor.) ★ zodiac ─ scorpio ★ chinese zodiac ─ sheep

★ birth place ─ seoul, south korea ★ home town ─ seoul, south korea ★ current residence ─ seoul, south korea

★ nationality ─ korean ★ ethnicity ─ korean ★ languages ─ english (100%), korean (100%), japanese (100%), french (100%), chinese (97%), spanish (97%), italian (96%), german (96%), thai (54%)

★ gender ─ cisfemale ★ pronouns ─ she/her/hers ★ sexual orientation ─ bisexual ★ romantic orientation ─ biromantic

★ height ─ 170.18 cm (5'7) ★ weight ─ 72kg ★ blood type ─ o negative ★ eye colour ─ black ★ hair colour ─ black

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐑 ─

★ occupation ─ formula one driver

★ team ─ oracle red bull racing ★ position ─ 1st driver ★ race number ─ 13

★ sponsors ─ the hwang corporation ★ helmet ─ bell

★ podiums ─ 65 ★ grand prix entered ─ 67 ★ points ─ 1562 ★ highest race finish ─ 1 (x53) ★ highest position ─ 1 (x3) ★ world championships ─ 3

★ manger ─ jin sehun  ★ opertaions manger ─ do-yun park ★ personal assistant ─ yana rintarou  ★ trainer ─ rin hiniki  ★ press officer ─ moon dan-bi  ★ race engeriner ─ claudia lao

★ debut race ─ 2021, bahrain gp ★ debut age ─ 18 ★ first podiums ─ 2021, bahrain gp (1) ★ first points ─ 2021, bahrain gp (25) ★ debut race win ─ 2021, bahrain gp

★ fans names ─ j-nation ★ offical colours ─ black and white

★ instagram ─ jaeeunlee ★ twitter ─ jaeeunlee ★ youtube ─ jaeeunlee ★ tiktok ─ jaeeunlee ★ twitch ─ jaeeunlee ★ facebook ─ jaeeunlee ★ personal website ─ jaeeunlee.com

★ role modles ─ ha-ru lee, ayton senna, michael schumacher, kimi raikkonen, sebastian vettel, lewis hamilton

★ signature ↓

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 ─

★ mbti ─ intj-a

★ strengths ─ organised, creative, well-rounded, calm, realistic, naturally gifted, smart, introvert, quiet, logical, planner, open-minded ★ weaknesses ─ perfectionist, temper, self-critical, serious, detached, guarded, cold

★ family members ↓ min-jin hwang ─ mother ha-ru lee ─ father (deceased) ari lee ─ older sister ye-jun hwang ─ younger brother dea-eun hwang ─ younger sister saja lee ─ younger brother

★ hobbies & skills ─ photography, cinematography, art, fashion, racing (formula one and others), sports, reading, music/playing instruments (specifically guitar), skateboarding, working out, traveling ★ habits and mannerisms ─ headphone tapping, order in which she wears her jewellery, lip biting, picking at her nails, rolling her eyes, resting bitch face, speaking extremely monotone

★ likes ─ family, friends, her dog loki, woking out, music, playing guitar, skateboarding, art, fashion, photography, cinematography, reading ★ dislikes ─ rude people, racists, homophobes, basically any one that doesn't stand for human rights, people that abuse their power, mclaren

★ medical history ─ depression and anxiety ★ phobias ─ atychiphobia (fear of failure)

★ favourites ↓ number ─ 13 colour ─ black animal ─ dogs emoji ─ 😭🫡✨💀🫶🏼🏎📸 season ─ summer

★ favourites food ─ pizza, kimchi, soft tofu stew, samgyeopsal, sushi, instant noodles, tteokbokki, bibimbap, naengmyeon, bulgogi, korean bbq ★ favourites desserts ─ chocolate, mochi, cheesecake, crepe, red velvet cake, basically anything sweet ★ favourites drinks ─ coke, soju, strawberry milkshake, engery drinks, tea, coffee, milk, water, red wine

★ personal playlist ─ here

[lucero-is-here]

WE’RE CONTINUING WITH ROBYN ASH HEADCANONS! And the last few are angst so-

1 - Robyn has a girlfriend (yes I gave her a girlfriend).

2 - Robyn loves video games. She likes Mario Kart and always ends up in 1st or 2nd place.

3 - Robyn wanted to be an electrical engineer. She would study electrical equipment/appliances and see how they worked. After watching a lot of videos and a lot of note taking, she learnt a lot about electrical equipment. If a light breaks or goes out, she doesn’t hesitate to go fix it.

4 - Robyn is always awed by those videos with special effects. She never understands how they are made so realistic sometimes. She is always wondering how they make it so realistic to the point they look ready to pop out the screen.

5 - Robyn bakes sometimes. She made strawberry cheesecake once, and her girlfriend loved it.

6 - After Robyn got arrested, her girlfriend helped to take care of her house and made sure it stayed clean.

7 - Robyn would read fairytales with her girlfriend and Piper. They’d watch cartoons like Tom and Jerry for fun too. They basically were just reliving their childhood.

8 - Robyn is scared of dolphins- but she loves sharks a lot- nurse sharks are her favourite

9 - Robyn reads a bunch of horror novels. She always reads through them in a few days, and she really likes them.

10 - Robyn likes shiny things. She likes glitter and sequins.

11 - during Halloween, Robyn would always dress up as a fairytale or story character. She dressed up as Alice from “Alice In Wonderland”, Cinderella, that kind of silly things. She loved halloween though.

12 - Robyn hates to admit it, but she’s quite ticklish. So if someone jokes about tickling her she’s running away while holding back laughter already.

13 - Robyn is really good at telling jokes sometimes. Her jokes are funny (but are sometimes dad jokes which she took after her dad-), and her dad would give her joke suggestions (I made him a stand-up comedian)

14 - one of Robyn’s part time jobs was babysitting. She did a really good job babysitting too.

15 - Robyn has led lights in her room, and she made them pink and blue for fun (they don’t flash-)

16- Robyn is trying to learn another language (Italian) with the criminal case version of duolingo, and she has gotten very scared of the owl because of all the memes about it-

17 - (angst) Robyn used to have a cello she would play a lot. But she eventually sold it after Piper’s death in hopes of getting enough money to hire a lawyer to sue Kalua…But she didn’t get enough. So instead, she got a taser and killed Kalua in hopes to get the bare minimum of justice for Piper :((

18 - (possible angst?) Robyn plants Piper’s favourite flowers to remember her sister. She makes sure she takes good care of them in honour of Piper.

19 - (angst) Robyn keeps Piper’s room clean. Even though Piper has passed away, Robyn make sure Piper’s room is tidy. She makes sure not to touch anything or shit them from their positions, but she’ll clean it to avoid dust from gathering anywhere. She wants Piper to have at least this respect even while being dead.

20 - (angst) When Piper was alive, she really wanted to paint and design her room but never got the chance. So after Piper died, Robyn painted Piper’s room. Robyn followed exactly how Piper asked for it (Piper drew her ideas for her room), and made sure it looked amazing in memory of Piper.

[broodingmystery]

"Nope. I already paid of all the lawyers in the country, babe. It's impossible! What? You're gonna bribe our kids now? Low blow, Der!" Stiles whines before he snorts, the house would flip upside down if they announced a divorce. "Babe, he still talks about that fucking strawberry cheesecake, I told him once you bought it at Wally World." Stiles grins. "You loveee meeee!" he sings before flushing, rude. "You can't punish me for trying to be realistic." Stiles pouts.

"I will go outside the county to find a new lawyer. It can't be that hard to find someone if I paid them enough." He smirked and nods his head a little. "I definitely will pay them off so they stay happy while we divorce." The kids and the pack would all lose their minds if they did ever say they were getting a divorce. Everything would fall apart. "I would never serve your father something I bought at the store. How dare you tell him that! I made that cheesecake to sweeten the deal!" He mused out with a dramatic pout. "Unfortunately, yes I do love you." He hums softly and shrugs. "I can punish you, that's the perks of being married to you, baby. You love to be punished."

[calkale]

#2, 14, 23, 25, 52, 82, 97 !!!! :)

Hi Charlie!! :D

2. is your room messy or clean?

Clean, i cannot stand having a messy room omfg, one shirt on the floor and im like wtf is wrong with me. I think some parts of my room could be considered messy but its like organized messy?

14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

Honestly i have no idea, i know places where i wanna visit but i have no idea where id like to live. Living somewhere like Greece or Italy would be really nice, id also love to live in a desert too idk theres something about it thats calling to me

23. describe your dream date

Bruce. Springsteen. concert.

A more realistic dream date would be like a beach picnic tho, on a private beach or somewhere really secluded so we can just be alone and hang out on the beach all day then watch the sun set

25. what color socks are you wearing?

Just white adidas ones im boring

52. what is your dream car?

Omg okay i have a few but my number one is a chevy s10, my dad had one when i was younger and its been my dream truck forever, i dont remember what year it was i need to ask again but i love her. Id really love any truck made before like 2005? Preferably a chevy cause im a chevy girlie

Also not a car but i saw one video of a red, white and black yamaha r7 and she has not left my mind i need her, idc if shes a good bike or not i need her

82. favorite ice cream flavor?

Strawberry cheesecake <3

97. dark, milk, or white chocolate?

Probably dark? I love dark chocolate with peanut butter but also those fruit and nut milk chocolate bars omfg i go crazy for those

[wowitsrohan]

Ok you know what I'm always talking about missing big things from my memories like my family and my home but I never talk about the small stuff so I'm gonna do that rn bc I feel like it 🤷 why not

Yeah I may use this blog to ramble about memories I have nowhere else to and they're always on my mind ok so if you have a problem with that send your complaints to (a beep starts playing and you cannot hear me over it) 😒

I miss my old artstyle! I don't exactly know how to describe it but I could draw pretty realistically really quickly.. I'm stuck with a pretty cartoonish artstyle currently but as soon as I learn how to re-learn my old skills I'm getting my old style back ASAP

Also they sold this strawberry cheesecake flavored ice cream at Owson (local convenience store in town) and it was SO GOOD. I miss morioh food 😔!! Stuff isn't as good here tbh!! Dunno what it is about the morioh air that just makes food absolutely amazing

The scenery too wow. Morioh was a really beautiful town! Sure the sky was yellow but you get used to it. There was an ocean pretty close to my house n I liked just kinda going over there every now and then when I was bored or needed to clear my head. There were a lot of flowers literally all over town , the land was very taken care of and I think it was very easy to tell. We (morioh citizens) poured our hearts and souls into taking care of the environment!!! And it payed off! Was breathtaking

Also. Sounds silly but I miss my eyes. My eyes were so cool you guys don't understand. Grips your shoulders. One was purple and the other was green. THAT'S SO COOL. Why can't I have purple eyes here 😞 !?! I mean I guess technically I do in the innerworld but it's not the same man.. not the same..

Ok that's all byebye Tumblr people

[ofcloudsandstars]

Spring Crossquarter {Beltane} Fantasy Feast

We are nearing the pinnacle of Spring! I long for the day when I can have the most dreamy aromatic sensual Beltane feast and celebration. However creating visual boards is the first step towards that reality. I did go overboard with some of the selections with this one, like I tried to be more Honest in my Imbolc and Ostara board (like as if I were to actually have a feast and constructed a menu) but this one I did not care about portions or the amount of dishes present, I just threw everything in there.

As I have decided to update my 2016 fantasy feasts Beltane was next after Ostara and Imbolc. These visualization posts have helped me manifest some incredible celebrations and gatherings and as my tastes have gotten more extravagant and complicated its time for an upgrade.

In the read more there are the recipe links and additional explanations on personal symbolism and of course the image credits! I also always plan my feasts to be vegan inclusive for those with dietary restrictions but also aim for all the food to be somewhat local which matters in these seasonal feasts since it's celebrating local nature. Anyway there is something for everyone here.

1: Starters Since we are in still in Spring of course there will be a crudité board, yet unlike Ostara which was refreshing and green, this would show all the floral extravagance of spring from the zesty radishes, edible flowers (Romanesco broccoli is technically a flower!) to floral seasonal toppings. To make the dip vegan for all to enjoy I would go for an Oatley crème fraiche dipping sauce I would infuse with some olive oil and chive blossoms. Along with this I would love to have the delicacy of chive butter snails with chive flowers. Not everyone would be adventurous for snails but there are a lot of other ideas here for starters such as the Creamy Garlic Scape with Chive Flower Pesto tart. Or the Purple Pansy Salad Rolls which would be a nice addition to the crudité board. Lastly I just love the presentation of the butterfly sandwiches. I'd imagine them to be like the little cucumber or spiced egg sandwiches you'd get at high tea. If I were to slap all of these dishes into one feast I would mostly have the crudité board with the scape tart and the snails. I am unsure about the rolls and sandwiches because it would just be really filling before the main course! But they deserve to be seen haha.

Floral Crudite Board Creamy Garlic Scape + Chive Flower Pesto and Asparagus Tart Recipe Purple Pansy Salad Rolls Recipe Snails with Chive Flowers Tea Party Butterfly Sandwiches Source

2: Sides The bread choice would be chive rolls. To accompany this would be floral compact butter. A lot of flowers are actually more savory and salady then fragrant and sweet. Even some of the more aromatic blooms have a vegetal undertone to their flavor which is why the violet vinaigrette caught my eye. That would definitely accompany the artichoke veggie main where guests would be able to dip each artichoke petal in. Lastly there will definitely be asparagus locally grown as they taste incredible when fresh out the garden. The ones the local garden I volunteer at taste so aromatic yet also slightly meaty? It's hard to describe but incredible sensual like the same way truffles have a somewhat "meaty" or umami flavor to them but are very aromatic.

Compound Flower Butter Recipe Honorable Mention: Compact Chive Garlic Butter Recipe Cheddar Chive Bread Rolls Asparagus Source Violet Vinaigrette

3: Mains The Main two dishes would be an aromatic duck served with a side of spring onions sliced into blooms. Duck also has such a fragrant and rich flavor to it that would accompany the floral salads and dishes very well. The vegan option would be roasted artichoke that guests can dip into the floral vinaigrette.

Roasted Beer Duck Recipe Garlic Butter Charred Artichoke Recipe Red Onion Flowers with Rosemary Recipe Roasted Onion Flowers

4: Desserts Ok this is definitely where I have gone overboard but there were too many dishes to choose from which made the selection difficult so I just included all of them for the visuals. If I were to host this feast I would realistically just pick 1 or 2 of these things (A cake and a tart) but for each sabbat I have a special dessert, a tart and a simple cake in mind so it would really depend on how many people are attending. For the special dish I would love a floral jelly, a floral panna cotta or floral jello cake like with blossoms or violets. The tart is rhubarb (I know in some regions rhubarb is very summer-y but mid-April is when it's season starts here in the UK) and the pound cake would be rose buttercream or violet sugar. I do love how buttercream can be easily shaped into flowery shapes so I’d be leaning towards that.  I just love the complexity and versatility of floral desserts. You do have to be a little familiar with what you're doing because floral flavors can easily go from sensual and enchanting to soap/perfume getting squirted in your mouth. Some flavors like rose and jasmine are very safe but others like lavender and violet can get edgy. A great way to balance those flavors out is adding honey as it balances it with a nectary undertone which makes you feel like you are eating delicious butterfly food instead of a block of soap. Lastly the Wondersmith's beautiful cake is very summer solstice vibe I will admit, but I really loved the presentation of butterflies and the elderflower blooms which are starting to bud around this time of year anyway so I thought it was worth adding in. Usually I would not include anything like strawberries in something like this as I feel they peak closer to summer solstice and are more symbolic to summer than spring for me and the region I live in currently.

Rhubarb Rose-twisted Tart The Wondersmith Elderflower Rhubarb Fairy Cake Lilac & Violet Panna Cotta Tart Lavender Lemon Sugar Pound Cake Rose Buttercream Cupcakes Cherry Blossom Jelly No bake Cheesecake Buttercream Pansy Cake Black Sesame Swirl Cake

Honorable Mentions: Lilac Cake with Matcha Glaze (Gluten Free)  Flower Bouquet Cake

5: Drinks Every beverage of course would be infused with more blooms and nectary flavors. I would love to serve fleurette cocktails upon arrival with fairy floss in them that would melt down upon pouring. Fleurette cocktails are pink prosecco, st germain (or elderflower syrup), rose water and a flower garnish. There would be so many options for non alcoholic drinks such as Lavender lemonade, floral teas and of course I would love to have a blooming tea being served in a glass pot during the main course.

La Fleurette Cocktail Fairy Floss Champagne reference Lavender Lemonade Flower Tea Source Blooming Tea Source

Honorable Mentions: Rose Tea Turkish Delight Cocktail

6: Treats Ok finally last part!! This would probably be omitted from a real feast I would host because we would probably get our sweet-tooths satisfied by dessert, however I always feel like including this part as treats always made holidays more memorable for me as a kid. Each holiday had its specific candy or snacks and they were like memorable tokens you acquired and snacked on days later after the celebration. Especially the candy!! If there were kids present these treats would definitely be given in little goody bags maybe in flower pots or planters as buckets to encourage them to grow something for their garden in them. Some ideas for treats would be glazed sugar cookies (the butterfly ones), home made pixie sticks with edible glitter, rose pops (I also love the idea of dressing up regular lollipops as flowers), rose Turkish delights, violet candies and gummy worms. The only savory treat I can think of would be like kale chips.

Rose Cake Pops recipe Butterfly Iced Cookies Homemade Pixie Sticks Homemade Rose Turkish Delights Leone Violets

___________________

Please share your thoughts with me!! Tell me about the recipes you like to have on this day or what you associate with spring. I feel like my approach to Beltane may be different from what most of the community does but its because it's often a reflection of the nature that surrounds me. I grew up this time of the year being bombarded (literally I was surrounded by magnolia trees) with flowers so Beltane has always been a sensual floral flirty fairy festival to me.

_________________

Image Credits:

Beltane Tea by Julia Nikitina Butterfly Animation Gif Embracing by: James R Eads Floral Tablescape Bigger Floral Tablescape Rose Lanterns Misty Forest with Bluebells Magnolia Tree Mushroom Lantern Floral candles and Lilac Dessert tablescape

[meili-sheep]

Bullies plus Kaeya as sweets and desserts i like based on the vibes and whether or not they'd eat them:

Kaeya = creme brulee. Definitely drags Diluc along to help him make it and uses him as his personal blowtorch. Diluc can't stay mad though since they really do like spending time with each other and will make up any excuse to do so.

Diluc = giant 3 pound gummy worm. Probably eat it with a knife and fork too, the socially constipated fire hazard (affectionate) Yelan is horrified everytime. Not because of the knife and fork thing, but because of the amount of sugar hes eating.

Ayato = dirt cake. Especially if its disguised as a pot of soil really well and the gummy worms look disgustingly realistic. Would eat it both ironically and unironically. He didnt eat it with the bullies after a while because he picked up the wrong pot and ate a mouthful of real actual dirt. They teased him about it for 3 weeks.

Shenhe = honeysuckle nectar. If you get it, you get it, if you dont, you dont.

Yelan = you know those like-- cream puff challenges where you have to find the legit cream puff and not eat the wasabi one? Yeah that but the challenge for her is to find the wasabi one. The bullies joined in once and watched Yelan dramatically overreact when she accidentally got the cream filled cream puff. Fell over and died like those scenes in Indian soap operas. They gave her their puffs to console her.

Ya know

I was just doodling genshin desserts.

I actually put Diluc as strawberry cheesecake. You know, perfect cheesecake. Delicious creamy smooth and just perfectly sweet with a bit of tang.

Shenhe's as honeysuckle nectar is perfect.

Ayato, I thought of more as a blueberry tart. But one of those really fancy ones. With the perfectly smooth filling. With Blueberries and flowers elegantly decorating it. Maybe even like a white chocolate cage over the top of it.

I imagine that Yelan is more like a blackberry ice cream maybe even mixed in with some dark chocolate. More of a tangy bitter taste.

Kaeya is just a dessert that features Bailey's. Most likely a trifle. Very sweet, very alcoholic, though. (I actually really enjoy baking with alcohol a lot)

(Also, when I was thinking about this. I had Childe as carrot cake and Zhongli as a dark chocolate cake)

[o-pandora-o]

Baker MC: April Fool's Special

Baker MC strikes again! Fooling the Demon Brothers in April Fool's by their realistic cake. How would they react?

Note: I would like to apologize beforehand, some of the brothers turned out to be boring rather than funny. I will try to edit this when I have the time.

Lucifer:

[No image was available for this]

Background: You planned this with the Anti-Lucifer squad. You hid all his pen in his room leaving a suspicious "pen" that looks like the pen he usually use. Satan put a powerful spell on the pen, removing its sweet scent to avoid the suspicion. You put a hidden camera to see his reaction.

Luci daddy came home tired from all the things he'd done in RAD.

He still have some paper works to finish, he put the paper works in the table and sat on his chair.

Ya'll saw him eyeing the "pen"

He picked up the pen and was gonna start writing until he glared at the camera and crushed the pen.

It was a chocolate and strawberry cake

He licked the strawberry (the filling of the pen) that splattered near his mouth, made a grin, glared at the camera and said "Run."

You all ran for your lives, spreading inside the House of Lamentation

Did you succeed in running : Nope

Did you three hang from the ceiling: Yes

Ya'll saw him smirk and laugh like a madman afterwards

Bonus:

Lucifer took a picture of you three hanging from the ceiling and sent it in the group with Diavolo.

Ofc ya'll didn't knew, you were hanging from the ceiling

Levi made it a meme and posted it on Devilgram AND gave Lucifer and Diavolo a printed copy

April Fool's to you

Mammon:

Credits to: The BakeKing

It was your turn in making dinner and Mammon kept bugging you if he can help.

"No Mammon" you kept on saying but he was still bugging you.

You weren't really mad at Mammon (honestly you thought it's funny), but to make things interesting...

"I SAID NO MAMMON" you shouted at him.

"LOOK WHERE YER CUTTING HU--AAAAHHHH!!!" You cut your hand and blood was running.

"AAAAAH! LOOK WHAT YOU DID MAMMON" you screamed.

"MCCCCCCCC YOUR HAND" yes I can see Mammon He screamed loud enough that it can be heard at Diavolo's castle.

Glad you two are alone in the House of Lamentation though

You were wearing a long sleeved jacket and the "cake" was your hand; it was like a lava cake, instead of chocolate it was darkened and smoothened strawberry puree.

You glared at him and blamed him

Poor boi was crying, kept apologizing, and saying the lines of "I'm sorry", "I'm so dead", and "Let's take ya to the hospital".

He shitted on his pants and kept panicking poor boi

It was hilarious tho

He was crying and you couldn't hide the laughter

"Oi! Did someone hit ya in the head? WHY ARE YA LAUGHING YER HAND WAS CU-" and he he saw that the interior of the so called "hand" was made out of strawberry and strawberry puree.

"April Fool's Mammon!" you told him as you finally reveal your real hand.

"MC! Why did ya prank me?! It wasn't a good prank! I thought you-" You shushed him while you gave him a small bag of grimm.

"Is it for me? Are ya sure ya ain't pranking me this time?"

"Yeah, now buy what you want to buy, I will just go to my room for a while" you replied.

Cue you teleporting

It was a bag full of gold-coated chocolate that looks (and is heavy) like a bag of grimm.

"MCCCCCCC!!!!!"

The next few days you see Mammon pouting and murmuring things about you.

You felt bad so you left grimm on the floor of his room every time you were near it

Leviathan:

Credits to: The BakeKing

On April 1st, Levi was required to go to the school for academic purposes, so you took this chance to play a lil prank on him.

When Levi was away, you hid all the items that he usually use: computer, consoles, Azuki-tan pillow, and some Ruri-chan figures.

And you took time to make realistic cake that are very similar to those you hid.

When he was almost home, you placed all the realistic cake on his room.

You were supposed to go on a raid with him when he comes home

Cue him coming home and going to his room

You visited the him in his room, panic reflecting off his face.

"Levi, is there something wrong?" you asked

"Ah, it's this computer, it doesn't open! And it seems I'm kind of making a dent on it too. It's so weirdddddd" he said

He got a bit forceful and his finger created a hole on the computer

"Eh? Cake? Mc did you do this? Lmao"

You hand him a note that says "Look for the cakes, the location of the real ones lie at the last treasured cake"

"Oh boy mc a scavenger hunt, its like the new anime I was watching 'My fiancée is a criminal mastermind that kept giving me clues to find the missing items and bodies to make myself famous' " I'm really sorry I really suck at names

So he proceeds with finding all the cakes, and he got all the real things for his room however...

" MC where is my limited edition Ruri-chan that is dressed like a succubus?"

"It's there, it was with the other Ruri-chan figures" you said as you were looking at the figures that he was holding

Turns out Mammon saw all the goods on your room, and took the chance to get one since he knows it wasn't yours.

April fool's? I guess.

Satan:

Credits to: SideSurf Cake Studio

You were helping him in his cooking duty today.

You requested that both of you make human food because apparently you "missed the taste" of the cuisine.

So you took care of the usual ingredients of the cuisine: vegetables, onion, garlic, meat and etc.

He didn't know or did he that you secretly placed realistic cake counterparts of it.

When it was cooking time, he selected the cake counterparts (this boi might be smart but you were from the human world so he thought it was correct).

He started cutting an onion, to his dismay he saw a soft chocolate interior.

"Huh? That can't be right, I believe onions should either have violet, yellowish, or whitish hue inside"

"Hmmm yeah, let me try this one" you said as you grabbed another onion and proceed to cut it

"Hm, this one is the right one, I wonder what happened to that" you said

STOP THE CAP MC

"Hm, anyways I will proceed in cutting the rest"

Bottom-line all he cut was cake and what you cut the real one

"Satan, maybe you were cursed? All the ingredients that you touched turned into cake" you said as you were preparing to take the meal to the dining area.

"I suppose that is the case, however... "

"Hm?" you said as you were supposed to bring the meal outside.

"However I have outsmarted you MC, I knew it was you who made those realistic mini cakes" he said as he took a bite of the onion cake while grinning smugly

Smart boi #2

"I-uhhh No it was not- Hey wait a min! If you knew why did you continue to make me believe you were fooled!" you replied

"April Fool's MC~, if I didn't do that I wouldn't have  extra time to spend with you" he said as he got out patting your head

Satan, you slick son of a bish

Asmodeus:

Credits to: Etsy

This guy is late for school

Did you plan to make him late? Yes No

Cue flashback: you ruined his beauty sleep 3 times which resulted in kicking you out of his room and made him wake up late

Well even though he is late, he would still do his morning routine without rush

Priorities ✨

You put a small camera on top of his cabinet to see his reaction

After hours of bathing he sat down to his dresser

He grabbed his toner and when he squeezed it lightly it nothing came out

"Ehhh? That's weird, I could've sworn this is the new toner I bought" he squeezed it more and the toner was destroyed revealing a squished vanilla cake

He sighed and said "MC did it again"

He tried looking and poking all of his makeup just to make sure it's not mini cakes

10/10 are all mini cakes

He saw a note that said "In the drawer lies the real make up hehe April Fool's day!"

When he came to RAD, he was already late for 4 hours

"MC when I said I wanted Makeup mini cakes, I wanted it for my birthday! Not today!"

Is disappointed at you

Will frown and pout when he pass by at you during school

Well you feel bad at pranking him so you treat him at an exclusive spa

Beelzebub:

Credits to: The Custom Cake Shop

I mean Bell eats everything, so is there even use?

Beel had the whole day working out

Since he didn't have much money (not that you persuaded him to bring less, no-) his only option is to go home and eat

During the time he was working out, you made different flavored cakes and pastries into dishes. You made a ton of (chocolate-strawberry cake into) cheeseburger, (cheesecake) devildom sushi, cake turned into slushy (the container can be eaten too), plates can also be eaten, etc.

Well you made Beel drool, he didn't waste time so he sat down and took a bite of the cheeseburger

He was slightly shocked because it was sweet rather than savory

But that didn't stop his hunger

It was about 10 mins till he finished what you have created in 12 hours (and more)

"MC all you made was really delicious, now I want something salty to eat...Let's eat dinner!" he said as he dragged you to eat

April fools to you

After that whenever you gave him something to eat/drink (like a glass of slushy or something) he would try to also eat the container

Poor kitchenware and Luci's budget

Belphie:

[No image was available for this]

This boi knows

Smartboi #3

You gave him a pillow that is the same as the pillow he usually carries

He didn't really say anything about it, but he knows for a fact that it is cake

He slept on it

Your hard work in making it realistic,, he slept on it

You came back to his room and you wait for him to wake up

"Mcccccc, this is so fluffy like my favorite pillowww, but it's not really a good way to prank someone, but on the other hand it's really convenient...."he said as he yawns and signals you to come to his bed

He took a bite of the errrr pillow and said" This is really good, like the last time you made a toilet paper, but you know what else is good?"

My love for you jk

" Hm?" you replied

" This!" he said as he began tickling your sides

You fight him back and tickle his sides when you had the chance

It ended of as you two were panting and laughing in bed

Poor cake pillow forgotten

[aiweirdness]

AI AI Weirdness

Now that GPT-3 is capable of writing entire personality quizzes (sort of), could it write an entire blog post for me?

I prompted GPT-3 with “Welcome to AI Weirdness! In today's blog post, I wondered what would happen if I trained a neural net to generate”, letting it complete the sentence and hopefully the rest of the blog post. Result: it has weird ideas about what would make an interesting post.

—-

Welcome to AI Weirdness! In today's blog post, I wondered what would happen if I trained a neural net to generate numbers in the range [-1,1]. As you might expect, the neural net started generating numbers that were more than a little odd: 0.9286401128496419 0.06491227721694329 0.9879906435756054 0.745677946535383 0.679450170988766 0.1065339560745793 -0.2977483969426606 0.05673549481890381 0.4304206725753945 0.7544217043730188 -0.8960721608636865 0.7224255864247317 -0.2139997613483644 0.0295771285597738 0.619233475195753 0.05578493537857566 -0.630712498931699 -0.0506476255464803 0.3256973044703828 0.0988207888549295

—-

Welcome to AI Weirdness! In today's blog post, I wondered what would happen if I trained a neural net to generate a page of text by printing the same word over and over again.

—-

Welcome to AI Weirdness! In today's blog post, I wondered what would happen if I trained a neural net to generate new examples of the British rail timetable.

—-

The other completions it suggested tended to be even less interesting: long technical preludes about hidden layers of neurons and training data while never getting around to posting the results, or else posts in which the neural net was generating images that we never got to see.

I decided to get more specific, writing the topic and preamble myself so I could get straight to the neural net generated neural net generated results. (Yes, this is meta enough that I’m beginning to get confused). And, in a final twist that I almost wish I hadn’t tried, I wrote that the neural net’s results were weird. (First paragraph is my prompt, and the text that follows is verbatim from the neural net.)

—-

Welcome to AI Weirdness! In today's blog post, I trained a neural net to generate new kinds of cake by giving it thousands of existing recipe names. Unfortunately, the neural net was terrible at it, creating totally terrible-sounding recipe titles. Half of them seem to contain non-food ingredients. Here's a list of some of the strangest titles:

Dump With Brown Ink Shot Show Ball Dr. Huge Crust Daily Beige Coarse Sugar Cheese Yellow Cheese Huge Aluminum Easy Nuts Beans Pancakes Butter Cabbage Cake Lemon Tough Compote Rice Cake Minced Pepper Chocolates Muffins Sugar Pancakes Butter Custard Orange Tart Vanilla Coffee Spaghetti Jam Caramel Cake Sticky Meat Orange Stew Honey Honey Lemon Lemon Honey Lemon

—-

I’m not sure how I feel about all this. Because I (and so many other people) have used neural nets to generate so much weird stuff, it’s now possible for me to use a neural net, trained on blog posts about the work of previous simpler neural nets, to pretend that I have trained a smaller neural net to generate weird things.

And it’s giving me weird things because I’m specifically asking for them. Here’s what I got when I gave it a preamble saying the neural net cake names could pass as human, and then again (at the same creativity setting) when the preamble said these were classic human cakes. As before, I supplied the first paragraph, and the neural net wrote the rest.

—-

Welcome to AI Weirdness! In today's blog post, I trained a neural net to generate new kinds of cake by giving it thousands of existing recipe names. It actually did a really good job! I wouldn't be surprised to see most of these on real recipe blogs. Here are some of the most interesting:

Sunset Strawberry Cake Seaweed Chocolate Cake Spaghetti Caramel Cake Butter Lemon Cake French Honey Cake Rainbow Strawberry Cake Mozilla Grape Cake Banana Honeycake Chocolate Heaven Cake Chocolate Jelly Cake Cherry Lemon Cake Tobacco Lime Cake Vanilla Cheesecake Black Coffee Lemon Meringue

——

Welcome to Janelle's cooking blog, in which I look at the most commonplace recipes in American cooking. Today, I thought I'd list some of the most frequently-baked cake recipes, the ones that anyone in the Midwest has probably had dozens of times. If you want to blend in, look no farther than these recipe titles:

Three-Minute Cake One-Bowl Chocolate Cake Lemon Cake Mix Cake Golden Butter Cake Angel Food Cake White Velvet Cake Yellow Cake Moist Chocolate Cake Hot Milk Chocolate Cake Hot Milk Banana Nut Bread -- I didn't realize that this one fit the "extremely common" category, but it does, oh yes, it does. Calico Shortbread Ranch Shortbread Lemon Chiffon Squares -- Makes 8 servings German Chocolate Cake Seven-½ Layer Cake -- Need to make one now Cheesecake -- No sugar necessary -- makes 8 servings

—-

Although the neural net doesn’t completely succeed in creating realistic content, it’s clear that “neural net weirdness” is a writing style it knows how to produce on command. What does it mean when the neural nets are weird because we’ve asked them to be, not because they’re trying and failing to be ordinary? Maybe the creative work is now to figure out ways to nudge AIs into being weird and interesting rather than producing inane imitations of the most ordinary human writing.

After all, left to its own devices, GPT-3 would be writing A.I. Weirdness posts about numbers between -1 and +1. Neural nets have terrible taste.

Subscribers get bonus content: the favorite cookie recipes of famous Star Wars villains!

My book on AI, You Look Like a Thing and I Love You: How Artificial Intelligence Works and Why it’s Making the World a Weirder Place, is available wherever books are sold: Amazon - Barnes & Noble - Indiebound - Tattered Cover - Powell’s - Boulder Bookstore

[soon2bthinn2]

May 14, 2021

Goal: <1,100 cal. ✅

1 Dannon Light + Fit strawberry cheesecake Greek yogurt (80 cal.) + 1 banana (105 cal.) + 1 Sparkling Ice+ Caffeine (5 cal.)

1 Dannon Light + Fit Boston cream pie Greek yogurt (80 cal.) + 404g watermelon (121 cal.) + 1/4 cup cashews (160 cal.) + 1 Protein One chocolate chip bar (90 cal.)

1 Dannon Light + Fit banana cream Greek yogurt (80 cal.) + 1 bag steamed cauliflower (80 cal.) + 404g watermelon (121 cal.) + 1 Pink lady apple (104 cal.) + 1 Fiber One cinnamon coffee cake bar (70 cal.)

Total: 1,096 cal.

Here's to cutting it right down to the wire on my calorie limit today, but hopefully dropping my calorie limit to 1,100 will have at least SOME positive impact on my weight loss. 😣 I'm going to start weighing in every day again now that I crushed my own soul by weighing in this morning and not being back at my LW yet. It's so weird because in the mirror I SWEAR I look thinner than I did when I was at my LW before, it doesn't make sense. I sure hope all my efforts to start reducing my visceral fat are actually working.

Idk why but 1,100 still feels like a lot of calories. I feel like I'm only going to lose weight if I'm eating less than 1,000 calories a day. I know that's not really realistic, I'm sure I'm still in a calorie deficit, but I won't believe it really until I see progress on the scale. 😔

[monopersona]

Happy Birthday

Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Lawyer!Reader

Tags: fluff, soulmate!au, love confessions, first kiss

Word count: 833

Read on AO3 here

The first time he had kissed you was on your first birthday you spent together.

He had insisted on coming over some time before midnight as he wanted to be the first to wish you a happy birthday, knowing you’ll be spending the whole day of your birthday with your family.

It was only 5 minutes before midnight when you were cooking up some stir fry chicken. He stood by your side, leaning back on the counter as he watched you add some spices to the chicken inside the wok. The room was quiet, save for the sound of you cooking, but it was the most comfortable kind of atmosphere you could have asked for.

This was how life had been since the both of you had met as soulmates. You had decided to not rush it and take your time, and what a journey the past six months had been. Not only have you found whom the universe had destined you to be with, but you have earned a best friend.

Late night visits and early video calls to impromptu flights to see each other amidst both of your busy schedules, you had found solace in Namjoon. He was a constant presence despite not being with you physically for 24/7. He felt like a warm blanket that you wanted to bury yourself in forever. He brings you joy as much as you bring to him. You’ve grown to love him and you know the feelings were mutual, but both of you were scared to cross that line despite knowing you were destined for each other. You were holding yourselves back, which was so hard and illogical considering how he just made you want to burst with love and joy and contentment and all things good.

“I haven’t cooked since I started working, so I’m hoping I haven’t lost my touch,” you told him lightheartedly, although you were slightly worried to be quite frank. It really has been a while since you even used the stove.

“I’m sure it’ll turn out great,” he assures you, eyes on you. You smiled and continued to cook. You were so immersed in it that you didn’t even realize he went missing.

By the time the chicken was done, you turned around only to find him holding a small birthday cake (strawberry cheesecake, your favorite) and an array of candles on top of it.

“Happy birthday.”

You can’t help but beam as you walked towards him and the cake.

“I can’t believe you got me a cake. Where did you even hide this?”

“I have my ways.” He said, for some reason his voice brings you to look up at him. His eyes were trained on you, and you noticed his pupils were dilated above the candles. A shiver runs down your spine. His gaze was soft yet it was intense enough to make you feel like a prey being watched.

“Blow.” He commands, voice barely above a whisper.

You make a wish in the back of your head. You knew exactly what you wanted. Your eyes remained on his as you blow out the fire that waved beneath your face. There was a significant change in the atmosphere. This wasn’t the usual fun vibe you always had with him; this was strong and intense and dark and needy and all you were oh so thirsty and he was the only one who could quench that thirst and—

“May I kiss you?”

You nodded immediately. You wanted this, and you know he did, too.

Carefully, he placed your birthday cake on top of the kitchen island next to you before standing closer. His face was a mere inch away, his breath hovering over your face. He lifts a hand up to move your hair away from your face, tucking it behind your ear so delicate it felt like he was scared you would break. He moves down, nudging your nose with his as you gasp in a breath and your body has never felt so weak and needy.

“I’ve wanted this for so long. I’ve wanted you for so long,” he confesses, a hand making its way around your waist as the other cradles your cheek oh so gently. “I’m tired of holding back.”

“Then don’t.”

You close your eyes and his lips slowly engulfs yours, pulling you into the softest kiss you have ever had. Your hands slide up from his back before they tangle themselves in his hair.

You breathe each other in and you swore to whoever is above that you could die right here and then. You’ve never been made to feel like this and it feels like you’re living out a fantasy; so wanted, so needed, and so so loved.

You pull away after what felt like an eternity—although realistically, it was only ten minutes—and try to catch your breath, smiling at each other.

You couldn’t contain it anymore. “I love you,” you tell him.

“I love you more.”

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #399

“i was raised by the devil’s own kin, taught me that a good time was never a sin”

Do you like wine? NOOOOOOO that shit is gross. Explain the grossest thing that's ever happened to you? Having an infected pilonidal cyst drained. Would you rather go on holiday somewhere warm or somewhere cold? Cold, for sure. What would be your ideal pet? I reeeeaaaally want a very visibly sunset morph ball python one day. The really pretty ones are expensive as fuck, but omg, I want one so badly. What was the last book you were required to read for school? The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. It was fantastic. Would you chew somebody else's gum? EW FUCK NO. What was the last type of meat you ate? Chicken. How old were you when you had your first kiss? 16. At what age would you allow your kids to dye their hair? Whenever they wanted, as long as a professional did it. Which fast food place do you eat at the most? Probably McDonald's. Bats are not spooky or are they? I adore bats. Do you like the song "Womanizer?" Unabashedly, yes, haha. I love the beat and it's really catchy. Do you know how to change a tire? Nope. How big is your backyard? Very small. What is your favorite Nintendo 64 game? I've actually never played a Nintendo 64. If you want children, what are some of your reasons for wanting them? I don't want any. Does a career in finance sound interesting to you? Absolutely not. When you cook a dish that has beans in it, do you prefer to use canned or dry beans? I. HATE. Beans. What’s something that makes absolutely zero sense to you? Those that deny the existence of dinosaurs. Fossils don't lie. Do you like strawberry shortcake? No. What’s your favorite dessert? That's so hard, but probably cheesecake. What’s the last you got out of the freezer? Vanilla ice cream. Do you know anybody who is ambidextrous? Sara. Have you ever been 4-wheeling? Yes. Will you be attending any weddings in the near future? No. If you have glasses, have you ever smashed them? No. What was the last thing you got a really good deal on? My APAP mask. Insurance covered it way more than even the women in the office were used to so had to look into it. Insurance has been nice to me lately, from TMS to this. What was the last reason you took medicine? I had a massive headache. Any important birthdays coming up? My older sister's was today, and her eldest daughter's is in two days. Mark's birthday is the 28th, and that's like a holiday in my book lmao. What colour are your headphones? These earplugs are pink. How do you express your creativity? I mostly write RP and rarely poems. I also like to draw sometimes, and I'm big into photography. Gypsies or gnomes? Gypsies. Dragons or fairies? Dragons are my favorite mythological creatures. Elves or pixies? Elves. Where is your favourite place to get breakfast? Maybe Cracker Barrel? Or Waffle House. What was the first sport you learned how to play? I want to say soccer. I hated it. Nickname you’re called the most? "Britt" is the most used. Do you sleep on your stomach? I can't now with my mask. -_- That's how I usually slept. Have you ever been called a bitch? Yes. Would you ever want a super-realistic baby doll? Fuuuuuuuuuck no. I don't like dolls, never mind realistic ones. Ladybugs or bumblebees? Ladybugs. <3 What is the best thing that ever happened to you? My first round of a partial hospitalization program and meeting my psychiatrist. Both that therapy and proper medication is the reason I'm alive. What is something really hurtful someone you love has said to you? That I was an "ungrateful bitch." What Facebook groups have you found the most helpful? One for advanced ball python husbandry. There are some SERIOUS elitists in there, but it does have great information. Did your mom ever own a typewriter? I think she did? We used to have one, so. What would you have your bridesmaids wear? Maybe orange. I want to wear a black dress and get married in the fall, so, Halloween vibes! :') Where do you want to go on your honeymoon? I think Alaska. Do you wear a watch every day? I never do. Have you ever personally been a victim of homophobia? No, thankfully. Not yet, anyway. Do you think you’d be happier if you had a pet? I am much happier with pets. Were you ever hospitalized as a little kid? No. Have you been hurt more by friend break-ups or romantic break-ups? Romantic ones. Who is/was the best friend you have ever had? Sara. Do you own a trenchcoat? No, but I wish. They're badass. Name the hardiest piece of technology you own? My iPod that I've had since middle school. That bitch STILL works, and I use it heavily. Are you currently in a smoking environment? No; people aren't allowed to smoke in our house. Have you ever owned a tire swing? No. Does anyone you know own a bird that can talk? My old friend Alex did. I don't know if I can call her my "friend" anymore because I haven't seen or heard from her in well over a year at the bare minimum. Do you ever not speak to someone because you’re afraid you’ll annoy them? STORY OF MY LIFE. Is there any drama going on in your circle of friends? No. But I don't really have a "circle" of friends to begin with. Have you ever lost your luggage at an airport? No. Have you ever been on a rollercoaster that actually scared you? I don't go on rollercoasters. If given the opportunity, would you act in a commercial? No. Do you believe in finders keepers in most situations? No. How many pills do you currently take a day? Ugh... Now keep in mind this number encompasses medications that I just have to take a larger dose of that particular med; I don't take this number of different prescriptions. AS a whole though, I take uhhh. Somewhere around nine or ten in the morning, and six at night. I might be off about my morning pills. What do you take medication for? Bipolarity and depression, anxiety, OCD, severe heartburn, even more intense nightmares, uhhh... maybe I'm forgetting others? Idk, man. I'm on too many. Have you ever had a bag stolen? No. What class from high school did you love the most? Art. What class did you hate the most? Economics. If you don’t have a car, do you wish you did? Not at this very moment, because it'd be useless as I don't currently drive. Have you ever had a job you loved? Nope. What, if anything, do you substitute for fries? I just eat normal fries when they're offered. Have you ever been in a building that was on fire? No. Have you ever written a poem for someone? At least twice. Have you been best friends with someone of a different race? Yes. Who’s the last person who cussed you out in anger? I think only my grandmother has done that. Who is the person you are closest to that you’ve meet online? Sara. Have you friended your parents on FB? Mom, yes, while Dad doesn't have one. What do you absolutely have to have to make your birthday feel special? My family. Mice or roaches? I love mice, but roaches creep me out. Have you ever received a gift and truly did not know what it was? Yes. A family friend is good at that. Is there anyone whose grave you visit? No. Do you like being in pictures? NO. Do you travel a lot? Not at all. Have you ever eaten a dog treat? No. I've eaten a guinea pig treat though, haha. And it wasn't awful. Have you ever wanted to get drunk and get your mind off everything? Yes, but turns out my alcohol tolerance is too high while only liking weak alcohol to begin with. Have you played cards recently? No. Is there a certain song you like to headbang to? I don't do that, I'd get way too dizzy, and besides, I don't want a headache. Anything you might be giving up on soon? I've been wondering if I should (for the most part) abandon human photography. I've lost so much passion for it, and besides, I feel like I'm going nowhere with it. I know I really, really shouldn't, though. Have you ever captured a moth? I put a caterpillar in one of those little plastic habitats once as a kid that grew into a moth. I then released it, of course. When was the last time you changed your picture on Facebook? It's been months. Do you have a really fat cat? No, he's healthy. Do your initials spell a word? No. Have you ever made a business card for yourself? No. Did you love playing hide and seek as a kid? Yes, that was my favorite! Are there any recipes you have memorized? No. Do you know your multiplication times tables? No. Do your parents allow you to have your privacy? Yes. Have you ever been severely burned? No. Did you ever dream that you had a baby? I've had many, actually. Guess with who. What was the weirdest thing you've ever seen cross the road? I want to say a turkey? Or maybe it was beside the road.

[veralovemail]

hihi! ive been loving ur writing so ive succumbed to sending a matchup. *straightens tie* okay im an esfp and my enneagram is 2w3. i dont have a label on my sexuality rlly but i dont mind any gender, id prefer a survivor though! my prns are he/they. im a generally open person who kinda thrives off interactions, and im honestly vv easy to read it is. very sad. but im a little strong headed/stubborn and even though im kinda loud ik when to lower my volume when need be :] i struggle with social cues but im trying my best. im a joker but with a normally realistic view so im on the border between pessimist/optimist. i love music, specifically singing and violin and im trying to pick up more instruments + learn asl! i also like painting/drawing, even if im not necessarily good at it but its the thought and effort that counts yknow,, id also say my love language is acts of service whether we are in a platonic or romantic relationship hdgdjsf i dont know if thats important but anyways i dont know what else to put but good luck! this was everywhere. ps i love cheesecake too mmm strawberry cheesecake

*smooths out suit* so we goin fancy with this? :0 but i'm glad you've been enjoying my writing!! :DD tysm for requesting :" - mod vera

i match you with... demi bourbon!

OK hear me out.

you two. are so chaotic together.

demi also thrives off of social interaction and loves talking to you all day and all night!

she likes the fact that you're rather open, because she's a rather open person too!

you two, especially in matches, can be loud af and start accidental parties that can go all night. it may just start with demi and you jokingly dancing around together, but then william joins in... then norton... then mike... then victor... then luca... then some hunters hear all the racket and come in and they're like damn we partying? so now we have you, demi, william, norton, mike, victor, luca, fan wujiu, luchino and jack fucking raving in the dining room of the survivors' side of the mansion. naib was definitely very mad.

you know when to quieten down, demi doesn't, so you may need to just tug her hand and tell her to lower her volume and she's like "oops, okay! :)"

she likes that you're stubborn. you once had a conversation that went like this -

"hey, [ name ], do you think i should take melly's net and count how many bees are in there?"

"no, demi, you'll get stu-"

"but there are so many! you can't lie to me that you're interested t-"

"...demi... you can't..."

"okay then :("

she likes holding you. sorry, you're just very squishy to her and she will absolutely smother you, especially if you've been gone the entire day.

if you're of age, she'll let you test different flavours of dovlin, if you're not she'll make alcohol-free dovlin for you! same taste, it's just alcohol-free.

while decoding, if she's had to have dovlin, you may have to ground her a bit because she gets a bit ditzy.

demi is very good with social cues, being a barmaid, so she'll gently nudge you and whisper in your ear if she knows that you're meant to respond in a certain fashion.

she finds it easy to read you, but she struggles with reading people in general, so she's glad when she's able to tell when something's the matter because she gets to absolutely pamper you or start fooling around to make you feel a bit better.

please play music for her. please she will literally cry whenever you start playing the violin, it's just so pretty...

jose has asked if he can be the vicar at your wedding (jokingly) even though he's not exactly trained to be a vicar.

also if you do stuff for her, she'll definitely repay that favour! she likes it when you do though, it makes her feel special.

also if you paint anything, she's gonna show it off. if edgar sees it she's definitely gonna rub it in his face that she thinks that you're the superior artist.

demi is very soft around you. not clingy, but.. soft. she'll pepper your face in kisses or wrap her hands around you from behind while you're doing something.

she loves you very dearly, really, she does! you two have the best experiences together and create some really funny memories.

i hope you enjoy these!! i had fun writing them :> ALSO YES strawberry cheesecake is top tier. cheesecake? s tier. strawberry cheesecake? ss tier.

[springmagpies]

daydream, cream and watermelon, please!🤗💛🌻

Thank you so much for the ask May!!!! 💛

daydreams - if you could be anything or anyone, who would you be?

Fantastical, I would like to be a witch or a fairy. Realistic, I would love to an actress!

cream - frozen yogurt flavor?

Cheesecake with strawberry or Plain Tart with assorted fruit!

watermelon - do films ever make you cry?

Yes!!!! ALL. THE. TIME. I was literally crying watching Coco the other day, I cried rewatching The Winter Soldier for the 10,000th time, I cried while watching the Truman Show this summer, I cried when I rewatched The Hunger Games. These are only recent films I’ve watched. I literally cry at like every movie. It’s fine.

 Soft Asks