#reading act 5 and suffering rn

[firefa]

"man, act 5 can't get any worse" doc scratch:

[faaun]

pls i need to provide updates

[cieloclercs]

what would you say (if i told you i love you)? — charles leclerc

PART: 5/? (read part 4 here)

summary. in which childhood best friends blur the lines between what they’ve always known, and something more

pairing. charles leclerc x artsy!reader

warnings. it’s GROVELLING time !! sad charles, sad reader, swearing, everyone still kind of hates charles (as they should) angst but not quite as angsty as the last part

face claim. tara michelle

author’s note. i hope this is enough suffering for you guys 😭 i’m weak tho so there’s a tinyyy bit of progress at the end 👀 i feel like this one’s a bit messy so i’m sorry about that?? it’s also kind of just setting up the next part but oh well 😭 anyways, LAST PART COMING UP NEXT ☹️ i’m gonna miss this series :’(

NOW PLAYING | Singapore 2023 post-FP1 interview: Charles Leclerc

COMMENTS 32k

username i’m still charles’ number 1 hater rn but he looked so sad at the end… ☹️

username girl no we need to be strong! don’t fall for the sad puppy dog eyes (i know he’s cute but srsly don’t) 🫠

username you’re right, you’re right 😔 haters until the end 🫡

username sir don’t try and blame your shitty mistakes on y/n 😭😭

username HE LOOKS SO SAD I CANT 🥲

username i really hope y/n sees this and realises he’s actually sorry

username no way that’s too easy. charles needs to apologise properly !!

username oh my GOD the way he started smiling when he said y/n is his ‘lucky charm’ AND THEN THE WAY IT DROPPED WHEN HE REMEMBERED THEY’RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE IM GONNA SCREAM 😭😭😭💔💔💔

username charles do you see what you’re doing to us charlesy/n stans?? PLEASE JUST TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL FFS 😫

username i swear if these two don’t pull their heads out of their asses soon I WILL COMMIT MURDER

username so real bestie 😔

username it’s such an invasion of privacy to ask about this though 😭

username fr the press don’t know when to keep out of it 😒

username i think he knows he’s in love with her now, he’s just not sure how to fix things ☹️

username i’m scared this feels like right person wrong time you know? 😃

username don’t say that 🫣 i’m just praying y/n forgives him. as soon as he apologises properly ofc, can’t make it too easy for him mwahahah

username i want to keep hating him but i’ve never seen him look that sad 🥲

username CHARLES YOU DONT GET TO ACT LIKE THE VICTIM WHEN YOU’RE THE ONE THAT’S CAUSED THIS

username so true. he needs to stop feeling sorry for himself and apologise 🙄

liked by yourfriend and 47,837 others

yourusername always on my mind ☁️💫

view all comments…

username SHE’S BACK IN MONACO GUYS EVERYBODY STAY CALM

username MOTHER HAS RETURNED !!!

username wait is that f1 she’s watching on her phone? 🤨

username omg it is 🤭

username SHE WATCHED THE RACE OMFG

username charles podium as well 😩😩

username it’s like he knew she was watching 🥹

username i hate how quickly everyone’s switching up on the charles situation just because of that interview but at the same time i can’t deal with my parents fighting anymore i need them to make up 😫

leclerc_pascale Bienvenue à la maison, ma fille ❤️ / welcome home, my girl

yourusername 🥰

arthur_leclerc YOU’RE BACK

yourusername did you forget? i literally saw you twenty minutes ago 😭

username the caption 🤔

username we can all agree she’s talking about charles, right?

yourfriend ma femme 🤩 / my wife

yourusername mon amour 😘

username she is everything.

username forget her art SHE IS THE ART RIGHT THERE

charles_leclerc belle / beautiful

username EXCUSE ME??

username SIR WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE PHAHAHA

username charles get tf out of here 😭

username i love how y/n’s just straight up ignoring him 😭

username CHARLES IS HERE GUYS HOW ARE WE FEELING

username i’m so conflicted rn

username like i want them to make up but at the same time he needs to SUFFER like he made y/n suffer

username fr, make him squirm a little ��

username idk guys, if charles leclerc commented ‘belle’ on MY instagram, i’d be on my knees in an instant 🫣

username girl please 😭

username charles babe please go away you’re ruining the vibes x

username i swear to god if he’s here just to fuck with y/n’s head again i’ll fucking kill him

username he wouldn’t do that

username @charles_leclerc if you want to win her back this is NOT the way to do it

arthur_leclerc @charles_leclerc what did i tell you? 👀

username HAHAHA ARTHUR STOP

joris_trouche @charles_leclerc you should listen to our advice mate 😃

yourfriend @arthur_leclerc @joris_trouche shut up both of you 😒

joris_trouche yes ma’am 🫡

username they’re all ganging up on him 😭

liked by formula1updates and 9,736 others

f1gossip Charles Leclerc and Y/N Y/L/N spotted at the same night club in Monaco 👀

view all comments…

username OH MY GOD IS IT HAPPENING??

username there’s no way this is coincidence charles is boutta beg for forgiveness i’m calling it

username y/n’s actually smiling tho 😭 charles please don’t ruin it x

username we need y/f/n to scare him off before he can ruin her night ���

username AHAHAHA YES

username what i’d give to be in that club rn 😔

username fr y/n better be roasting him 😭

➜ part 6

taglist: @cxcewg @incoherenciass @formula1mount @allywthsr @meabhcavanagh @driveswiftly13 @zzblooda @gaslysainz @be-your-coffee-pot @siovhanroy

[rizzanon]

loving undoing fate so far!! this recent snippet of the og timeline is scratching an itch in my brain for angst and i love it 💕💕

I’m pretty sure ppl have mentioned it, but MC’s fate would’ve been avoidable if someone had actually properly trained her (looking at Babs in particular rn, seeing how she took training and giving her mantle to others a lot more seriously— both in canon and in this fic). Like… even if they didn’t have time (which is still bull, but wtv), Tim was literally sent to Paris to train in his early robin years, they could’ve sent her to train with someone else.

also, as much as i enjoy seeing dick suffer and become brutal in grief over his siblings, i think it’s a bit odd that he’s acting like he knew her all that well, considering how he didn’t even know where her room was or how to comfort her and talk to her after her argument with damian when she was 16 in the new timeline. I doubt much changed in those years from the og timeline. (This is not a nitpick of your writing, i just think it’s interesting he doesn’t acknowledge this, compared to Jason, who straight up says he failed her—Though, maybe it’s easier for him to see since he knew what it was like to actually be close to her before his death?)

sorry i rambled, but amazing work! i’m excited my holiday will be filled with reading this series!

-🥐 (i hope there’s no croissant anon yet, i chose this since, like several have mentioned, the mlb allegations and MC-Marinette allegations are strong lol)

glad you like the story so far <33

i wouldn’t say that barbara didn’t take mc’s training seriously. she did, though at the time when mc did decide to become batgirl, barbara was still going through a lot of things (like joker shooting her making her paralysed, her no longer being able to be batgirl and instead is still trying to find her footing as oracle) all of these factors build to her initially being unsupportive of mc taking up the batgirl mantle. but she realises later how much mc reminded barbara of her past self, which is why barbara gave in and helped her. but here’s the thing. technically, barbara isn’t responsible for mc. because mc is bruce’s child.

if you read batgirl 2000, you can see barbara was more involved in helping cassandra settle in with her vigilante work. and that’s because cassandra is barbara’s ward. so she is (and has to be) responsible for cassandra. and with cass losing her ability to read other people’s body language and having to relearn defense skills, i guess barbara shifted her focus onto cass more.

more of barbara and mc’s relationship will be explored in chapter 5/6 so maybe when i do post that, this will make more sense…¿?

also, i wouldn’t say that mc’s fate would have been unavoidable if she’d been trained properly. she is trained to a certain extent. mc was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. going in and fighting all those thugs whilst recovering from prior injuries she got from past patrols/missions, she pushed herself too much and was unable to recover and avoid the gunshots (i would say she was holding out on her own quite well before she was shot)

and tbf, i wouldn’t say dick is acting like he knew mc all too well (unless my writing does depict him that way, then mb 😭) i would say he’s still grieving and in denial that someone else—in his family—died. that’s his way of coping with mc’s death. he’s furious, he’s upset, he’s grieving, but there’s nothing he can do to make himself feel better, because he knows deep down that he failed mc. he’s just trying to come to terms with it i guess.

(mc is NOT marinette btw 🤨😒)

[sapphic-agent]

Can we talk about Shigaraki for a minute?

In my opinion, I think Shigaraki is a fantastic villain. (Minus when Potato man took over and him being side lined rn.) Shigaraki goes from someone who was stunted in childhood to him being the most fear man in Japan, respects his league, cares for them, ACTUALLY listens to them, and is an actual threat, while making a valid point about Hero Society. Tell me why people read him so... fucking weirdly? People think Shigaraki still suffers from angry outbursts, doesn't give two shits about his league, and games all day. He isn't like that anymore. Dude was literally fucking calm when Toga had a knife at his throat. He lets his team speaks their minds, and gets others' outputs. Like, he DOES change. The reason why Shigaraki acted like a "man child" was because AFO literally stunted his growth on purpose. He had childish behavior because that's a result from trauma. He grows from it, and overcomes it.

Or people making him into an incel is just... gross. Or people just being grossly ablest, too. People being like "lololol Shigaraki is crusty he doesn't take care of himself he smells he's musty" which is... 1.) grossly ablest to people who have eczema/skin disorders. He looks "crusty" because has eczema scars. No amount of shitty, scented lotion will get rid of his scars, 2.) It's clear Shigaraki struggles with depression. Having depression rips you of the energy to do anything. Getting out of bed or showering is hard for some people. Minus this tagent, It really sucks AFO just kind of took over the role of the big bad when Shigaraki kept fucking say it's HIS dream, HIS path. Not AFO's. Even saying he HATED him. Tomura, you deserve better. Both within fandom and canon. 8-9 years of development, and this is what we're getting for the big show down?

I completely agree.

I've touched on this briefly before, but Shigaraki's character progression in Deika City was spectacular. It was great to see him reclaim the power that he was shunned for (and accidentally destroyed his family with) and evolve into a true leader. He was really coming into himself and working towards his own goal. Deika not only carried season 5 (season 5 was soooo bad), but it solidified Shigaraki as one of my favorite anime villains.

And then Horikoshi took away his agency by having AFO snatch his body😐 Him wanting AFO in the first place literally undid all the progress he had just made.

This is what I can't stand about Hori's writing. He'll introduce a character or concept or character concept and then completely disregard it moving forward (quirkless discrimination, corrupt society, quirk marriages, Momo's entire character, etc.). Someone said it in one of my reblogs; the manga introduces a bunch of interesting concepts, Hori just has nothing interesting to say about them.

Tomura definitely cares for the League. He says that what he wants is for his friends to be able to be free to do as they please. He was also infuriated over Magne's death. I think that they make him feel like he belongs and he has people to relate to and look after. He definitely thinks of them as friends

[linabirb]

1, 2, 3, 5, and 18 for Dazai, Makima, Reo, Bachira and Yuno. :D Ooh, you're into Kakegurui too! :DD The same questions for Kirari and Yumeko.

hi aurora!! ty for asking! (sorry for a late reply, i was busy ><)

"Why do you like or dislike this character?"

dazai:

LITERALLY JUST THISCHJSJKSKSKD he's everywhere. every single time there's an anime guy with fluffy brown hair and brown eyes you just KNOW someone in the comments is gonna be like "omg he looks like dazai" no he doesn't.

also.. idk i just got tired of him. i did think he's funny when i first got into bsd (i was 13-14 so you didn't have to do much for me to think you're funny) but now everything about his behavior is so. ugh. it's like okay!! you're a walking red flag!! not in a fun way!!

i still think he's a well-written character though. just not my type.

makima: i can just say that i'm into dominant women honestly her design is so cool!! i have her plushie right next to me rn. she's staring into my soul. she's a really cool and well-written character and i don't know, there's just something about her that still makes you (me.) trust her even though you know she's the villain here. also i really love characters who do horrible, horrible things but they believe that there is no other way and they believe they're doing the right thing. something about her is also weirdly comforting to me but we're not gonna unpack that right now that moment in the manga when she said that denji can just rely on her and he doesn't have to do anything. that felt personal to me. also the fact that in the end she just needed a hug and needed someone to love her.. idk, it's probably cheesy, but i found it heartbreaking.

reo: HE'S JUST LIKE ME FR!!! it's pretty much impossible for me to talk about reo without oversharing stuff so i'm just gonna say that. well. i know what it's like to be a sheltered kid who doesn't even know what they want from life but when they finally start to realize what they probably want, they get hit with that "nah don't do that" and also his relationship with nagi is so... HHHHHHH been there. done that. know what it's like. i was literally going "BABY NO. NO DON'T DO THAT IT'S ONLY GONNA HURT YOU MORE" even though i do like this ship djdksks. anyway yeah his character is very realistic, it was so painful for me to read the part where nagi was like "nvm i need you actually" and he said that exactly when reo started to move on...

bachira: i actually didn't like him that much at first because i'm usually not a fan of characters who.. like. have this "weird and goofy" kind of personality, i just find them kinda exhausting, but bachira's character actually turned out to be much deeper than i expected and i find him very relatable as well. also most of the time he felt like the most normal character to me HSJSJKAKDK

yuno: SHE IS SO. *falls on the floor and starts sobbing* i'm not usually a fan of characters who are like.. very fun and cheerful on the outside, but they're actually suffering (and i have. so many ocs like that. ironic, isn't it) because most of the time it's either written kinda poorly, doesn't feel relatable, or the fandom just boils their character down to that one trait, but yuno's character felt very refreshing to me, because her t1 personality already felt kinda fake and even es mentioned that she doesn't have to pretend around them and when yuno really does stop pretending, like. it's so cool because at the same time she changed a lot, but you know that she actually hasn't changed at all and she's always been like that. there always were signs that yuno is actually colder (haha get it) than she acts so it isn't surprising for her to act this way in t2 and it doesn't feel too drastic. also her wanting to be seen as an adult and wanting people to stop coming up with sympathetic motives for her is so.. it's so good.

kirari: hmmm i actually don't really have a strong opinion about her! she's cool! but i like her design a lot! her hairstyle, her eyes, her iconic lipstick, she's so pretty!

yumeko: YUMEKO JABAMI THE WOMAN THAT YOU AREEEEE... the crush i had on this girl when i was younger was so. shsdjasksksk. i know i just said i don't really like "weird" characters but yumeko is so unhinged, it's so fun to watch! i really like kakegurui exactly because of how it just. lets women do wild things and be in the center of attention and all. i like how at the same time it's hinted that her character is much deeper than it seems, but also she just REALLY likes gambling!

"Favorite canon thing about this character?"

dazai: probably not really a "canon" thing but i think his bsd wan design is cute :3

makima: SHE'S SUCH A GOOD MANIPULATOR IT DRIVES ME INSANE /pos

reo: i'll just put this here.

bachira: HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS MOM IS SO. 🥹🥹🥹🥺🥺🥺🥺

yuno: her answers to the interrogation questions are always so funny like you just know the girl is gonna deliver. "can you speak other languages?" "i can't speak english!" <- written in english. "can you tell us about your family-" "I ALREADY TOLD YOU I DON'T HAVE A FATHER"

kirari: that one scene with her and sayaka falling from that tower has changed me as a person forever

yumeko: she takes gambling so seriously, it's both cute and terrifying jdkdksks her relationship with midari is so funny 😭😭

"Least favorite canon thing about this character?"

dazai: his. uh. his personality in general jskslals SORRY IF HE WAS REAL I WOULD'VE PUNCHED HIM IN THE FACE ALREADY

makima: hmm don't think i have one

reo: it's like. at the same time it's basically my fav canon thing but sometimes i'm like "dude. please let nagi go. i promise you're gonna be fine. he's gonna be fine. guys. guys please"

bachira: don't really have one! good for you king

yuno: m-maybe the abortion reveal was too early?.. it's like, at the same time it fits her character, but i really feel like it was a bit rushed. (well if it really is true and it doesn't turn out that her murder actually was different) also GIRL WHO SAYS "uhh yeah that's probably murder". PROBABLY???

kirari: at the same time i like her "way too powerful student council president" status, but sometimes it feels like. too extra for me jdkdlsls

yumeko: sometimes i forget that her main motivation is to play a game with kirari, but then i remember and kinda.. get disappointed.. like girl what about simply having fun and vibing. her character does NOT need a goal!! she's perfect WITHOUT any motivation!!

"What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?"

my brain goes empty when it comes to music I'M SORRYDJDKSDLDL

"How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?"

dazai: not really "admire", but i think his dynamic with atsushi is cute.

makima: .. i don't remember her interacting with anyone except denji and some other characters HSJSKSLSL

reo: .. again DOES HE EVEN HAVE ANY IMPORTANT DYNAMICS WITH OTHER CHARACTERS. NOT COUNTING NAGI.

bachira: his relationship with nagi and isagi is neat :)

yuno: her relationship with kazui.. much to think about..

kirari: her relationship with sayaka! i don't ship them but i think their dynamic is really interesting.

yumeko: i'm going to say something controversial but. i think her dynamic with suzui is actually kinda cute?? again i don't ship them but it's. it's wholesome :)

[blankingbloom]

5/26/24

Dear Angelica (aka future me),

Hey! How are you? Before I start my thousands of questions, let me first say, congratulations on graduating and finishing your senior year of high school!!! this must be a bittersweet moment for you, as I am experiencing this at the moment as a junior watching the grades above me graduate and do senior activities. Graduating is a once in a lifetime moment, not everybody gets to graduate due to unfortunate circumstances, but congratulations! Thank you so much for staying strong, the k-12 system is literally horrible lol. I just wanted to say, I (17 year old Angelica) will forever be within you. I am you, but I want you to have no regrets or wising to be me because “life was so carefree” 💀💀 naw it’s not I’m suffering rn lmfao I have 3 summer classes, a job to juggle and volunteer opportunities to catch up on and college apps 😿 whomp whomp. I so desperately want to be you right now! It may feel insufferable at the moment and you feel lots of bittersweet feelings and loneliness being unleashed from hell (prison) (kleinisd) (kleinhigh); you should know that there is a whole chapter ahead of you and you’ve achieved a milestone! When something ends, a new opportunity arises. I hope you’ll feel better soon, knowing how I feel now will probably affect you 10x deeper (you’ll understand). Highschool for me was no fun adventure; I was barely sociable, barely any friends (like a few ofc I’m not a loser), I felt like I wasn’t on track to be my genuine real self anytime soon, but you have the opportunity to change that through college. I need you to be stronger for me until we get our masters in compsci 💀. Be an academic weapon once more for us plz!! I know you want that so bad. I know our experience wasn’t the best, especially during covid and certain situations, but there is a whole life ahead of us, that is depending on our actions. I trust us to keep it up! BTW Im missing a ton of the 2023 seniors, I can’t believe that it’s real. It low key hurt seeing everyone I had classes with especially in financial math, english, photography, and a&p graduate. It’s so bittersweet it low key hurt my feelings, especially seeing everyone I grew up with who were a grade above me. I don’t want to forget them at all, I want to remember who they are! I never peaked in high school, but I’m never going to see these people again, unless it’s by a rare chance someday, I doubt they would recognize me. I guess I just grew attached. Anyways, I have some questions LOL.

1. What is our plan after graduating Highschool? What college are we going to?

2. Did we end up submitting any of our SAT/ACT scores?

3. What’s your favorite song currently?

4. Are we still dating Ben?

5. Did we make any new friends?

6. What is your college essay about?

7. What made us stronger?

8. How was senior year? Was it any easier taking AP classes? Do we understand pre-calc?

9. Do we still want to take comp sci?

10. What happened to your H‑E‑B job?

11. Did we get any stoles/cords for graduation or not?

12. What was our final Highschool GPA?

13. What’s our class schedule?

14. What do we look like now? Do I still have short hair? Do I still look gay?

15. Can we crochet with greater experience?

16. What’s your biggest worry?

17. Are you happy?

Thank you for reading this!! Respond to my questions soon. Goodbye! I will always be within you.

Sincerely, Angelica

____________________________________________________________

REPLY:

Hi Baby Angelica!

Since you're from the past, I have so so so much to catch you up on. Time flies by when you're consistently stressed out. But don't worry! I will answer your millions of questions first! Then we can actually discuss :)

1. What is our plan after graduating Highschool? What college are we going to?

A: We are doing Computer Engineering! After hours and hours of research, I wanted you to have opportunities in both the computer science and electrical engineering fields. I want you to have a lot of pathways so you can have tons of money and opportunities! We are going to UT Dallas. We got CAPPED from UT Austin and UW-Seattle was way out of our budget sadly. Maybe someday my love :(

2. Did we end up submitting any of our SAT/ACT scores?

A: Hell no, they were too low LMFAO

3. What’s your favorite song currently?

A: Talk by Beabadoobee, Antihero by Taylor Swift, any MSI song

4. Are we still dating Ben?

A: Yes <3

5. Did we make any new friends?

A: YES! We aren't friends with.. those girl(s) anymore. They were bad for you. WE HAVE MORE GENUINE AND KIND FRIENDS!! There is a whole world out there waiting for you. I love my friends.

6. What is your college essay about?

A: Bugs. In the UT Austin essays, we wrote about photography, allergies, tamagotchis, etc.

7. What made us stronger?

A: Learning to adapt, spreading love, reading people, putting ourselves in uncomfortable situations in order to grow. Being with likeminded people!

8. How was senior year? Was it any easier taking AP classes? Do we understand pre-calc?

A: PRE CAL WAS MY MOST HATED SUBJECT. It is so fricking hard I dont think I ever understood the concepts. The AP Classes had lots of work in it but you managed your time fine and it was never that serious anyways (except AP 2D art) that sucked a lot. Senior year was shit im not even gonna lie. I didn't even attend like 98% of the events LOL. Fuck no I am not going back!

9. Do we still want to take comp sci?'

A: Computer Engineering babe dont sweat it

10. What happened to your H‑E‑B job?

A: OUR LAST DAY WAS TODAYYYYYYYY

11. Did we get any stoles/cords for graduation or not?

A: One stole for NHS, one stole for DUDU CREDIT!

12. What was our final Highschool GPA?

A: 4.6/6.0 LMFAOOO

13. What’s our class schedule?

A: -1st period: Late Arrival (Used to be Photography 4)

A: -2nd: AP Art History

A: -3rd: Photojournalism/Office Aide

A: -4th: AP Psychology/Interpersonal Studies

A: -5th: AP 2D Art

A: -6th: AP Pre-Cal (idk how u survived but girl... never again)

A: -7th: Early Release

14. What do we look like now? Do I still have short hair? Do I still look gay?

A: You got the short hair back and we still look gay asf. We have new pink glasses though and they're see through! We still have bangs. Shit load of stretch marks though smh. Im like 115 pounds now.

15. Can we crochet with greater experience?

A: fuck no

16. What’s your biggest worry?

A: If my roommates will like me, I'll feel lonelier, money, If ill be smart enough for college, if my friends now will still want to hang out with me :(

17. Are you happy?

A: I could be happier but I am okay! Not stressed right now :)

[charsdreams]

Living in spite of Nov. 5-6 Day 1.

I have all of 1 follower rn so this is more of a for me thing but I hope this helps people who may find this in whatever way they need help. (I think that makes sense)

Yesterday I let myself be angry. I let myself cry and be hurt and mourn a great loss. I posted a ton on here, more than I had in months, because this platform is really the only safe one I have, where the far right people in my life can’t find me and see the truth about how I feel. I’m usually pretty outspoken about my politics, but I’m going to have to change that. Lord knows how 🍊 plans on handling “the enemy within.”

I also learned yesterday that my own sister was happy that 🍊 won because she truly believed that Kamala doesn’t support Christianity. I asked her to cite her sources. The only thing she could say was “well I don’t follow that sort of thing, but people I know…” and that’s all I needed to hear. My sister is happy the man who wants to take my, no, OUR, rights away won because of a lie she was told.

But that’s not the point of today. The point of today is to live in spite of the people who would see me lay down and die. Today is for getting back up and staring down adversity and not allowing them to see us suffer. Today is about finding resources to help those who will be impacted more than me. Today is about mending my own hurt and learning to keep my head down. If the 🍊 supporters can move in silence and then come out with full force, so can we.

Today I got out of bed. That’s what I did out of spite. Instead of getting up and asking my mom to let me stay home claiming my head hurt something fierce, I got up and got ready. I snapped my boyfriend and did not hide my tears. Instead of being nonchalant about my despair like I sort of thought he would (yes, I know that says a lot about my relationship) he simply asked what he could do to help. And he didn’t pout when I said that I wasn’t in the mood for the sort of help he had offered (although it was tempting, I knew if I did that I’d make myself late for school) he just offered me some virtual cuddles. And that’s exactly what I needed. And for that I’m grateful.

Today I will keep my head down and act like I’m not as upset as I am. I will start to read the handmaids tale like I told myself I would weeks ago and I will work on my college essay. If anyone asks what’s wrong, I have a pain in my knee that I can’t explain and it’s bothering me. That is what I will tell them. I will not tell them how I watched the despair of a girl realize her fears had come true yesterday after I mentioned Kamala’s loss. I will simply say that I don’t feel good

And I will live in spite of what happened. That’s my little protest, my small revolution. My act of defiance. And if you read this far, I hope you do as well.

All the best,

Char

[immaturewriter]

character stuff

so since i cant sign into google docs bc its blocked i have to put everything aboit my characters for my new rewrite ill be writing once i can sign into google docs

dont read this unless you know whats going on lol

teddy

baseball, trumpet, baking, skateboarding, pranking (lowkey rn i see him as diabetic)

nathan

electric guitar, music, reading, cooking, pranking (ish)

cindy

martial arts, skating, photography, pranking

jason

writing, sculpting, debate (he's lactose intolerant i decided that now)

gabriella

debate, reading, she likes euphoria (maddy defender vibes)

chelsea

watching dateline, reading, watching movies

rosie

violin, reading, shes like a huge swiftie tbh, suffers from dyscalculia

ben

theater kid, hes jst there for the fun tbh, maybe tried rugby at one point and hated it so much

tiffany

she has 5 pets, acting prodigy, basketball player, she also likes euphoria

kimberly

reads, she has hypertropia, she also tried rugby at one point and enjoyed it but shes lowkey blind

[everybodysaycbx]

YOUR TAGS ON SOO’S FILMOGRAPHY ALFHAKHSAKBit really do be like that 😭😭😭

Like 75% of his stuff hits straight to the water pipes, even the stuff he only has a minor role in

LITERALYYYYYY its so hard to watch most of his stuff even tho i want to bc hes such a good actor but when theres a new movie of his coming out its almost always a serious drama and im like,,,,,,,,,,do i wanna watch him die again or do i need some happiness rn bcjskqkwjjdjshhhsqjj

probably why i rewatch 100 days my prince so often its my favorite kdrama of his (i love historical dramas so im biased lol) and yeah theres some sad and even tragic moments but its overall a good time and very interesting (plus he and nam jihyun are wonderful in this (and everything they do tbh) and so are the supporting actors

also now im going to use this as an excuse to ramble about my thoughts on the show bc i love it but i have Critiques™ so ill put a read more for spoilers bc ill talk about them a lot

almost all of these issues if not all are all about the writing so there wont be any criticism of the acting which i thought was pretty good overall by kdrama standards (there were only a few times where i thought it was detrimental to my enjoyment but again it was still more to do with my problems with the writing)

so to really get into it, the pacing suffers with the back half of the episodes feeling a bit rushed especially in the last few episodes. i didnt feel like the first half was dragging much except in a few areas but again it didnt detract from my enjoyment. the last id say 5 or 6 episodes really feel like they were speedrunning which made the ending less satisfying

so when i looked at reviews of the show years ago i saw many people criticizing how the main antagonist died bc it felt anticlimatic and i do agree, especially on first watch. while its not as jarring as the first time when ive rewatched it the way he dies still doesnt feel built up as well as it could have been and i think it could have worked if the pacing for the ending wasnt so rushed (plus the numerous twists during the last couple of episodes made it a bit hard to follow where it was heading and some of what WAS set up i think was lost in that but tbh thats par for the course for kdramas lol)

speaking of the ending, i get why it ended the way that it did with the marriage mandate happening again to make everything come full circle, but character wise i dont think it was the way to go. wondeuk has always expressed even before he lost his memory that he hated being royal and never wanted to live that life because of what his father did to get it. and even knowing that he wasnt wondeuk and was probably a noble at the very least he wanted to be with hongshim in the village or wherever they needed to go. hongshim similarly has already gotten used to being a commoner and has lived that way longer than her former life. even in the epilogue she doesnt really live her life as a noble even if her status has been reinstated. i think it wouldve made more sense if he renounced the throne and chose to live with her in the village.

adding to the last point, if they had stayed in the village together and he abdicated, then his half brother would be the crown prince and the queen wouldnt be on her bullshit even at the end of the show!!! dude literally killed the guy who was threatening you and controlling your husband and you still cant stop trying to fuck him over so your son can be king??? i know the evil manipulative queen is a trope in these but shes so illogical it was a bit annoying which is a shame bc i usually love those characters

the show like,,,,,less than halfway through forgets wondeuks half brother is even a character like why was he even there. theres some indication in the beginning of the show that he likes the crown princess but that doesnt really go anywhere (its only brought up in like 2 scenes at the beginning and in the epilogue wheres shes moved to a remote location with the baby and goes to visit for some reason.....dude yall had maybe 3 lines of dialogue between each other. why are you here) and he even tells wondeuk that he hates him but we never really figure out why bc he doesnt really want to be the crown prince that much (not that i can recall rn) so his only role in the story is to help the queen be a red herring but not be a real character of his own

this is more of what i felt upon rewatch but every time i rewatch it i find it more and more annoying but the palace drama where the queen is spreading rumors and then the guys who support the antagonist make fake fliers about how the kingdom wants her deposed for this in order to manipulate the king is just,,,,,extremely uninteresting upon rewatch. like so much is happening that goes on for so long and its dragged out for way longer than it should be AND it takes time away from the village plot with wondeuk and hongshim aka the actual interesting part. so now i mostly just skip those parts even tho when i first watched the show it was fairly interesting tho i felt it dragged on a bit too long so i wont say this is a huge strike against it or anything

while i knew the brother was going to die bc thats how these kinds of stories work i was still upset fjisjshdsjsh he was a great character and while i think it still makes sense why and its still narratively satisfying imo, i think it would still be satisfying if he lived and he and the princess escaped successfully. i think it would work a little bit better actually bc it would make the antagonists decisions make a little more sense in the finale bc not everything is going to his plan and hes losing more control (plus they deserve to be happy :(( they deserve the happy ending wondeuk and hongshim get too) plus it would still tie in with hongshims motivations for rejecting wondeuk initially before the epilogue

thats the last of the criticism but this isnt a praise so ill leave an idea i had for like a what if scenario ig: so i always wondered what would happen if either the antagonist doesnt get to wondeuk in time during the festival or he gets killed by the people the king sent to attack him and hongshims brother gets there to take them them plus her dad with them into hiding. and the awkward tension that would ensue when wondeuk either figures out her brother is the assassin thats been coming after them or just immediately knows when he sees him come to get them but they both dont want to hurt hongshim by telling her what they know about the other but shes distressed that they obviously dont like each other and this is all happening while theyre running around the woods and trying to find a place they can hide out and her dad is just,,,,,,,so confused the entire time but trying to make everyone get along fjwwqkdhuheuedh idk i could add to this later bc i have so many ideas on how it could play out but ill stop there fisksjbdjssjdjssj

[little-ideas]

That mixed troupe event where the members are super heroes? That but recasted with Chikage as the villain.

They have a Meet & Greet afterwards and he has to grin and bear it as tiny children try to take him down

[bambiebaee]

pac: what are their feelings for you?

hello!! welcome to a new pac. this one should help to get to know what does person on your mind feeling about you. this reading is for any type of connections romantic/platonic/relatives etc. this is a general reading, so take what resonates and leave what doesn’t.

rn i also wanna make some free/exchange readings, so feel free to text me if you wanna get one <3

pile 1

hi, pile 1! if you’re in communication with this person i think they really enjoy spending time with you, they feel relaxed and comfortable when you two interacting and they want to develop your connection more and more and they will work on it for sure. if you are in no contact then they’re definitely want to come through, they dream about you and that makes them happy. your person making plans for the future with you, they are ready to work on this connection, be patient with them.

pile 2

hello, pile 2! ohh, that’s so sweet, your person loves you sooo much. no matter what type of connection it is, they have such a pure, unconditional love for you. they feel like you’re the only one who truly understands them, like if you are their soulmate. they don’t need anything from you, just you being by their side is enough. they want you to be happy, to see your smile. you make them feel at home and they hope it’s mutual. they want to be there for you and support you no matter what. for some of you it’s unrequired lover, and if you doubt if you can trust them, you definitely can, consider giving them a chance.

pile 3

heyy! okay, so there may be a situation where this person loves you and make it pretty obvious, but you see them only as a friend, may be a vice versa too. they want to share their feelings with you, but it’s hard for them to make that decision. if that’s not the case, i only can say that your person see you as someone they can rely on, someone they can share they secrets and feelings with and know that they will be safe. this person never lies too you, they may be a little too straightforward at times, but they don’t mean anything bad at all. whatever your relationship are, they, first of all, see you as a friend and an ally.

pile 4

hi, pile 4! there’s definitely a romantic situation, if it’s not, take it as it resonates. so, this person, for lots of you, may be your ex. and they’re are really missing you, but they don’t like this feeling, i think they tried to fight it, but they just can’t. they want to be with you, want to make moves towards you, but their pride doesn’t let them do it in a normal way, so they may come to you acting like they are great without you, being cold and a little bitchy, whereas their heart is full of feelings for you and sweet words they want to tell you. even if it’s not an ex there’s this person who has deep feelings for you but hides or just can’t properly express them.

pile 5

hello! you may have kinda tough times with this person, there may have been a miscommunication, conflict or something happening between you that makes this person sad. they don’t resent you, they want to go back at times when everything was good, but they don’t know what to do, so they just hope for the better. maybe you should take first step towards this person, cause i don’t see them doing anything, this situation makes them kind of depressed, and just a thought of you makes them suffer. but they really appreciate you and your relationship.

pile 6

hi there, pile 6! for most of you this is someone new in your life, or someone you don’t know that well, and so are they. they are not sure about their feeling, there’s a sympathy, you seem fun to be around and they like interacting with you, but they don’t know what to do. they want to talk to you and get to know you better. i don’t see any deep feelings there, this person probably just okay with you. if it’s not someone new, then this person probably really confused about your relationship, they don’t know what’s going on and want to talk to you about it and get some clarity.

[dirtydancingdean]

✨ fic recs ✨

ok so back in like 2014 i watched supernatural for a solid 3 years until they killed kevin and charlie and i got bored of the bmol storyline. now im here again let’s not talk about it. BUT during this time i accumulated a Lot of fic and in the past two months i’ve gone through all 213 of my bookmarks and gone through like every rec list made after s12 in order to read fic set during every specific season while i rewatch the show. because im insane <3 im on s8 rn and wanted to share my list of favourites from each season so far as well as my favourite aus ! they’re all generally nsfw so minors be careful, and also check the warnings ! and i will update this when i finish s15 <3

aus

asunder by rageprufrock (23.8k, e, background samruby)

obviously the most perfect thing to ever exist. 

and this, your living kiss by opal_bullets (56k, m, background saileen)

poet dean fic need i say more. part dean studies if dean studies was elaborated on lovingly in detail for 56k words, part gorgeous and beautiful poetry, part incredibly clever commentary on meta and fan allusions, and part stunning exploration of the relationships in the show turned on their heads.  

one white little lie by komodobits (11k, gen)

this is SOOO cute. cas is so embarrassing i was covering my face the entire time i was reading it. if u want to be cheered up. read this. 

broadway musical by griftings (12k, m)

this is genuinely sooo funny. big “castiel did you fuck the michael sword” energy and jimmy novak as that “am not against gays” tweet, plus jo <3

c-s-t-l by komodobits (90k, m)

i haven't read this in a while but from what i remember it was incredible and also had cassie <3 

rest is under the cut because it got long fhjfkfklf

pre-series/season 1-3*

a turn of the earth by microcomets (time travel, 95k, standford era, m)

i think everyone’s read this at this point but if u haven't. what are u doing. go read it. it’s absolutely everything i reread it in the week before the finale without remembering half of the stuff it talked about and i was a WRECK. if u think about standford era dean every day read this. cas punches john winchester in the FACE. 

geography by aeli_kindara (3k, teen and up, warnings for discussion of rape/non-con and prostitution)

not dean/cas but a really wonderful and needed conversation with sam and dean during 2x02.

season 4

so says the sword by komodobits (85k, e)

yeah. i dont need to say anything.  

consequences of falling by fayjay (37k, e, background samruby, warnings for rape/non-con)

THISSSS FIC. pls it’s perfect literally everything i wanted when i was watching s4 and obsessed with love as an act of worship + ruby and cas parallels. ruby and cas get drunk together! ruby says this: “dean and castiel sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes the fall from grace, then comes battling the hosts of hell and wishing that you’d managed to get your skinny ass laid before the freaking apocalypse”! what more could u want!

named by rc_machlan (94k, m)

literally the best fic in the world i am not going to say Anything if you love dean and angels and the mythology of s4-s5 that was promptly dropped, you absolutely have to read this.

four people ruby seduced & one she actually fell for (or: ruby's epic love affair with humanity in general and sam in specific) by tuesday (3.7k, e, samruby, ruby/jo)

this is more background deancas than anything else and does contain brief, not romantic in any way dean/ruby and dean/cas, but like. if u love ruby (which i do) u have to read this.

season 5

final fantasy by orange_crushed (1.9k, m)

endverse.....this made me want to die

the (mostly accidental) courtship of dean winchester by tuesday (11k, m)

a classic for a reason. really cute and soft and the handprint and cas beating dean up in 5x18 are angelic marriage rites. what more could you ask for.

the girlfriend experience by rageprufrock (15k, explicit)

of Course i mean of COURSE. thee s5 deancas fic.

strike me down and i’ll come back more powerful than you can possibly imagine by trinityofone (10k, gen)

post 5x22 dean and cas rescue sam from hell with the help of some special guests. PERFECT. the only valid good omens crossover.

season 6**

something stupid by zatnikatel (20k, e)

this broke my heart and put it back together. one of my favourite cas characterizations, takes place over s5-s6 and it’s just stunning. 

a crash course in someone else’s history by annie d (11k, teen and up)

s4 cas ends up in the body of cas in 6x20. fucking life-ruining.

season 7

make known by domesticadventures (16k, teen and up)

this is a really heartbreaking look at dean’s headspace near the end of s6 and throughout s7, and it’s really wonderful with a hopeful ending.

redemption road by a whole bunch of people (652k, virtual season, explicit)

oh boy. ok. know ur herstory ! this was written from 2011 to 2012 and it is thee s7 fic, a virtual season written by 17 fans all together. it’s very very long and it suffers sometimes from having being written a decade ago, but im making my way through it right now and it still fucking holds up. i really do recommend reading at least some of it, you can stop around halfway through and you should be fine.

season 8***

rinse, repeat by ias (3k, teen and up)

exploration of cas when naomi forces him to kill copies of dean and then his perspective in goodbye stranger.

my keeper by whelvenwings (5k, gen)

another goodbye stranger fic, this time with bonus artist cas!

though the course may change by imogenbynight (51k, e)

au after 8x23. i love this fic so much. dean accidentally ends up making himself have to go undercover with cas and pretend to be fake engaged. also, charlie and kevin. do i need to say more.

apres by imogenbynight (24k, e)

au after 8x23 where dean goes to find cas after the angels fall in paris 🥺

*i have found exactly one bela fic that i loved, and zero henriksen fics that i loved, so IF u have recs for those. i would appreciate that.

**mostly the s6 fics i read were uh...vampire dean fics...

***have found one (1) good dean/aaron fic but im still searching for the perfect purgatory crew fics 

[blu3berry4non]

I tried to but I can't really express what I mean since I'm not English. (Edit: Well, I'm fluent in English, but I remember I was really tired at that moment so my brain was already in jumbles.) I think I also offended someone because of that. I wanted to be smooth, trying to use the words that might make them relate though it wasn't worded the way I meant it. And I didn't even have the time to fully explain myself without getting a cold shoulder. THIS WAS REALLY HARD ON ME, PEOPLE. I'm just really bad with interacting with people and since this incident I've been scared to interact with people online, too. Imagine getting so insecure to the point of trying to make friends online triggers your social anxiety, haha! I'm just socially awkward and I was trying to make people like me by acting tough and cool… I guess bloody tampons are a sensitive topic? Like women menstruate? Is that so bad? Is nature, how it has been going since, what, 10000b.c too much for you? You know what? Whatever. I could ramble about how shitty things have been and how this all came to be the way it is now. I'm done pretending like I'm the one being at fault whilst I STILL DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHAT I DID WRONG. (Edit: Was angry.)

I'm a voluntary swimming teacher for children between 5-12 and we had a mandatory schooling on how to do it when you find yourself in this or that situation. I had my period. My period came very inconveniently in contrast to that mandatory schooling, and so it was my first time using a tampon. When I was done, me and my childhood friend from when I was 2 (24y/o, female) were in the dressing stalls (she had recommended me to work for her and her crew, which I accepted after the trials), and I couldn't place my tampon anywhere without leaving smudges. I saw this hook on the wall where you could hang your clothes on, and hung my tampon with the string there. It's not normal to do that so I was laughing so dryly at it for like a half hour straight. My childhood friend was enjoying my reaction from her stall, too. I took a picture because the way it just hung there on a hook that was made for hanging clothes NOT tampons was so silly and so funny to me. It was new and funny to me. And I like to share my silly and funny experiences solely to talk about it and how much of a weird goober I am. In this case, I wasn't expressive enough, apparently, because people started dropping out of the servers and blocking me all of a sudden. (Edit: GUYS I think FR I'm schizophrenic, my mind filled in the gaps I forgot. I CLEARLY remember writing a thorough explanation, but I DIDN'T. It happened yesterday, too. I was packing my bag for school and I thought I had packed my German book since I had looked at it and read the words 'Neue Kontakte' (name of the method we use), I turned my room upside down to find my Dutch book, couldn't find it. (Which I later on the day found out was the German book I initially thought was in my bag) and the German book was the book I left at home (apparently, I CLEARLY REMEMBER PACKING IT.) I might have schizophrenia or I'm suffering from early dementia… This is the third time this happened to me. (EDIT TO THE EDIT: I JUST FOUND OUT THOSE ARE CALLED PSEUDO-MEMORIES AND I'M READING AN ARTICLE ABOUT IT SO I CAN FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET RID OF THESE WEIRDASS MEMORIES. (Edit to another edit's edit: I have hallucinations and pseudo-memories. Diagnosed myself; daughter of a psychologist. (can't exactly say for sure but I am trippin over here, that's certain.))

I mean, how bad at expressing could I be mess this up? I was stressing waaaay too much because I knew I had made someone uncomfortable. And this person below wasn't even one of the people I sent that image to, so I freaked out when I read that. Those were the only words I could come up with after experiencing TWICE an anxiety attack on the same day. (Edit: Feeling the lingering anxiety rn, but I'm a blunt, quite impulsive bitch so I couldn't left this feeling unnoticed without making things clear for people.) :

"I'm a little autistic about it." I meant that I'm quite oblivious to boundaries, I just cannot see them for unknown reasons. My mom is a psychologist, she had told me that people with ASD often can't read the situation. It isn't the best explanation, that I'm aware, but… I was trying to find common grounds to make explaining things easier… I couldn't even think clear, let alone come up with a decent response, because I was panicking, panicking, panicking, and once again, PANICKING. I was about to say I was sorry when… Blocked. Yeah, I could kiss my chances goodbye. At that point I just felt hollow, numb even. (Edit: this is what I meant with 'offending someone'.)

I was panicking. Like really, severely panicking. This person was the only person to talk to me normally and not block me… So I tried closing everything off to calm down and come back later to explain myself… Or so I thought.

Yeah, that was when it didn't sit right with me anymore and called it quits. The last straw, you could say.

I'm sorry for ranting and venting but I've just about had it. I really enjoy being interactive with people as Blueberry Anon, but it's been such a mental drain that I'm fucking up my school career. I'm so tired of being excluded solely because I'm bad at expressing whatever I am, and fitting into… Whatever 'society' means. Big 'go cry about it' moment rn, guys.

And now I announce, with a big sigh, the conclusion: I'm just silly, guys. Silly, inexpressive, and someone who just wants to be a fun person. Not someone who has to run away for something as trivial as this. Seriously. (I can't exactly say run, though. If my reaction follows the flee, fight, freeze and fawn psychology… I would be ostrich.)

Then again, sorry for the long text! Sorry for venting. Sorry for being angry, pathetic, being silly even. Sorry for the inconvenience. And I'm especially sorry for being me!

(My laptop crashed and I was so scared this wasn't saved because I SPENT MORE THAN AN HOUR ON THIS WHILE I SHOULD BE STUDYING. The stress of it all, guys, the stress of it all. T⋏T)

this is a gift for @blu3berry4non, (for some reason it wouldn’t let me send it in their inbox??????) but yea…

Sorry this took so long :(

[sailuncharted]

ok can anyone please tell me what signs to look for or which authors to avoid when reading xiyao or jgy fics? like there's one I'm reading rn which has xiyao as the main and only pairing but it also has surprise niel*an a couple chapters in. and I'm pretty sure the author hates jgy now as it has nmj being a d*ck (I mean when is he not lol) but gosh is it excruciating trying to get through it. I hate leaving things unfinished when I've become invested or else I would've stopped 😒😠 my boy jgy 🥺

hahaha, oh anon you're acting like we're not in the same boat trying desperately to find decent takes

the best i can do is tell you how i go about looking for fics to read

1. i read the same writers. once i find good characterization i read everything that person has to offer, i'll list a few of the people i trust below

2. i take recs from other people who've already trudged through the ao3 trenches. this is my favorite because there is less worry about running into a bad take

3. i look for jgy pov. if it's jgy's pov there is a higher chance that it'll be okay, this isn't always true but usually if someone is willing to write from the character's pov they don't hate him

4. i ctrl+f jgy's name and read around it to see if there are signs of hate writing or awful takes, if i don't like what i see i close out and didn't waste my time

5. look at their fic pairings (like the non xiyao) if its available, you can kinda tell someone by their pairings. if you see a lot of n*e ships or you get extremely Pure™ vibes from their page, those can be warnings that the jgy might not be so good and you might not end up with xiyao (this isn't to say 3z*n shippers can't write xiyao, just that if someone is REALLY INTO IT they might add it to their fic, I'm not saying its a bad thing, just a Thing)

as for that specific fic, I've actually seen a few people complain about fics with surprise n*el*n or surprise n*ey*o when it was supposed to be xiyao and to that, there isn't a lot to be done. if it's unfinished then #4 wont work, so you just gotta suffer. i'd just kindly ask the author to tag it and suggest that if they think a fic will have a pairing that tagging it isn't spoilers, it just helps you find the right audience

okay time for people I trust! in descending AO3 history order XD (I don't discriminate between cql/novel/donghua just FYI)

Hades_the_Blingking

ralf

roquen

ecorie

IfCujoWereSappho

lackadaisy

Shiome

Justkeeptrekkin

The Bathhouse (Cleoptrix)

ParadifeLoft

deuxjolras

vespertineflora

Ariaste

Erradianwhocantread

for the most part everyone above I've read multiple of their xiyao fics and all have good characterization of jgy, some write 3z*n but I've never been randomly surprised by a new pairing by any of them and I've enjoyed each and every one of their fics!

i'd also suggest looking through these people's bookmarks to see if you can find more authors!

[michelemoutons]

and at last, the post that maybe three people maximum have been waiting for...

em's comfort retro rally videos: a masterlist!

in a much-needed return to this blog's roots, and as an antidote to all motorsport- and life-related chaos, i now present to you: the first edition of em's favorite retro rally videos!

general disclaimer/info: these videos mainly come from the group B era of the world rally championship (wrc), which generally speaking was in the '80s. i am only human, so expect a lot of bias toward my personal favorites...which will become very apparent as you read this list hehe. also i'm not even gonna pretend to be an expert on this or anything. a lot of these are literally just based on Vibes

table of contents

i. my top 5 rally coverage videos

mainly coverage for television, recorded on VHS and uploaded to YouTube by some truly incredible people

ii. honorable mentions

not rally coverage, but retro rally videos nevertheless

often documentaries, mini-doc features, interviews

for all videos, i have indicated the language (most are in english fyi); if any links fail or videos disappear, send me an ask or DM and i'll remove the culprit/find an alternative link.

and now, onward!

(TW for occasional flash photography in many of the night sequences of the videos, as well as a gif included in this post)

i. my top 5 rally coverage videos

in which my bias toward audi sport, mouton/pons, mikkola, toivonen, and vatanen are put on blast for all to see 🥴 i am not an expert in anything i am just very good at research and a whore for aud—[SNIPED]. for the sake of brevity, i narrowed my favorites down to 5. maybe another time i will share all the rest!

also, a general note about the commentary: sometimes, the commentary around michèle and fabrizia can get... weird. keep in mind, they were the most prominent female team partnership around that time, and the first to nearly clinch a wrc wdc, and to modern ears, the commentators really didn't know how to act around them. personally, it wasn't horrible for me, i just ignored the weirder bits, but i understand if others might find it off-putting. also for the sake of your sanity don't read the comments.

5. Rally of the 1000 Lakes, 1984 | finland

link: overall coverage (eng)

podium: vatanen/alén/toivonen (full final results)

comments: this was definitely a rally for most of audi sport's drivers to forget: bar stig blomqvist, who came quite close to the podium finishers with a 4:14:01 to henri toivonen's 4:12:57! both hannu mikkola and michèle mouton had to retire from the race, which may lead you to wonder: why does this rank among my favorites? well, it's always fun to watch group b rally cars sailing through the air against picturesque scenery, and this video also contains an intriguing (at least for me!) look at the scrutineering process, with drivers at their most casual.

owie :( they were fine though!

4. Lombard RAC Rally, 1981 | britain

link: overall coverage (eng)

podium: mikkola/vatanen/blomqvist (full final results)

comments: hannu winning by 11 whole minutes even after rolling his car in the middle of the forest is actual legend behavior! anyway this was michèle's first wrc outing in britain, and even though she and fabrizia had to retire, they still did quite well, consistently running high in the leaderboards after the first few stages. and that's considering the fact that michèle had a bad cold for much of the rally and had to ask fabrizia to drive the car to service park for her at one point bc she was so tired. which fabrizia did... with a pencil in her mouth. lot of big names in one video—also, jean todt makes an appearance as a co-driver!

shamelessly poached off of one of my text post edits

3. Marlboro Safari Rally, 1983 | kenya

link: overall coverage (eng)

podium: vatanen/mikkola/mouton (full final results)

comments: ok can i just say how stunning the video presentation is?? the opening sequence is just!!! the shots of the wildlife! the sprinting giraffes! wow! anyway the visual of drivers in deck chairs just tickles me for no reason, and michèle please tell me what you ask for at the hairdresser's and also where you got that orange blouse (this is obviously not just specific to this rally, she always eats and leaves no crumbs). this was michèle's first entry and only finish in kenya (and of course it was a podium mwah). it was also her last wrc entry in the A1 quattro, as she switched to the A2 for the rest of her program in the '83 season. also this is one of my favorite podium pictures ever.

lksdjffnnkd there's almost too much to unpack... fabrizia somehow surviving in high waist jeans in a hot car... michèle's do-it-yourself shorts... this podium picture was the subject of a very frantic video chat conversation between myself and a friend at 2am a few months ago

2. Rallye de Portugal, 1982 | portugal

links: short recap (eng) | overall coverage 1, stuck in the middle of two other rallies. timestamps in descrip. (eng) | overall coverage 2, very vibey with cool music (ita... also peep walter röhrl speaking italian)

podium: mouton/eklund/wittmann (full final results)

comments: GOD I LOVE THIS ONE SO MUCH AAAA! michèle's first podium of '82 being a win? this rally being the one where there's footage of her going shopping with fabrizia afterward? (more on that later) them winning by 13 whole minutes? and that's not even considering THEE most poetic victory ceremony of all time! in fact let me talk about that bc the racing and the win aside, that's why it's so high up on my list! literally poetic cinema! it's night, they're standing on top of the car and floodlit and surrounded by cheering crowds but they may as well be the only ones there in their own little world, laughing at each other and barely even having to look to each other when they're raising their hands—like god! shut up! we get it you're besties 😭

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and now... last but certainly never least...

1. Lombard RAC Rally, 1982 | britain

link: overall coverage (eng)

podium: mikkola/mouton/toivonen (full final results)

comments: firstly, if you were to ask me about my dream podium, this would be it. hands down, across all series of motorsport, my comfort podium would be hannu, michèle, and henri in any order. (there's such a cute picture of them from this rally on pinterest, standing in order on a staircase. henri is not looking at the camera because he is laughing at something michèle is saying and it's such a Vibe but i cannot find it wah). the battle for second between michèle and henri ran down to literally the last stage, and their times are separated by seconds, which is just wild to me. the context of this rally deserves another post, which i honestly don’t have the energy to make rn, but just take my word for it that it threatens to destroy me if i think about it too hard! anyway this is just such an awesome rally and i’ve watched this video so many times haha

i love this rally so much that i actually had a character in a story i was writing attend the ceremony captured in this picture as a small child and made it a formative moment in her life. no, there is nothing wrong with me.

ii. honorable mentions

(is it obvious who my faves are? yikes)

'Group B - Avec Michele Mouton' (eng) - taken from a longer feature presentation about group b, a segment specifically about michèle. a friend once described its vibes as ‘a synth wave edit of an 80s anime set in a cyberpunk world about racing’

'1983 Audi Sport National Rally with Michele Mouton' (eng) - in which michèle takes journalist sue baker as a co-driver for a spin in an A1 and a rally win. fun behind-the-scenes video

'Intervista a Fabrizia Pons, la Regina delle Note' 1, 2, 3 (ita) - very thorough interview which is mostly fabrizia telling all sorts of stories, including the very entertaining story of how she found out she was going to be michèle’s co-driver. also what a badass title

'2008 Otago International Classic Rally' (eng) - THE BESTIES REUNITE THE BESTIES REUNITE!!! michèle and fabrizia reunite for a rally that fabrizia convinced michèle to join, they suffer some problems but there are plenty of wholesome bestie moments to be had

'Michele Mouton hurls Group B Audi Quattro up Goodwood hill' (eng) - i mean, self explanatory. the sound of the chirping tires? asmr could never. very short watch if you want a quick pick-me-up

'1990 Louise Aitken-Walker feature' (eng) - a video featuring a female rally driver from scotland and her point-scoring run at the rallye monte -carlo. i am convinced that louise was john finnemore’s inspiration or at least an influence for the character of linda fairbairn. no my hat is not made of tin foil what are you talking about

hannu rocketing around michigan back in 2017 (eng)

hannu flying around goodwood in 2015 (eng)

sometimes i listen to fabrizia's recent onboards (yes, she's still at it!) and this one is one of my favorites, from 2016 (ita)