#reader feeling the impulse to put her mouth on him wow she's just like me fr

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

Cherry Boy. [l.c.]

Chapter One of "Losing it". Reminder that each chapter in this series is stand alone and can be read without reading any of the others!

A new relationship is always difficult to navigate, for Chan, it appears to be even more difficult. For you? You’re just left confused as to why your new boyfriend of a month and a half hasn’t made a move on you despite your very obvious attempts to invite him into your personal space.  You soon realize that your boyfriend is a virgin, and that’s why he’s always running away with his hands covering his bits, even through a simple goodnight kiss. 

ao3 | m.list | minors dni! | reblog for chan's happy trail

WORDCOUNT― 10k

PAIRING― lee chan x afab reader 

CONTENT― brief break up due to horrible communication skills, virginity loss, reader gets super insecure about her body and personality, fluff, smut obv

NOTE― This is the reason I gave chan the first chapter in the series. It's because of those pics...you know the ones. Anyway, shoutout to @ressonancee and @onlyhuis for proof reading this for me! love u guys with my entire being!

smut tags under cut:: 

SMUT TAGS― virginity loss, makeout session, neck kissing, tit fondling, unprotected sex, belly button kissing, mentions and focus on his happy trail, he’s ticklish oops, blowjob, premature ejaculation, pussy drunk chan forgets how to speak, desperate sex babbling, finger fucking, hand and cock guiding, cream pie 

~

Chan has a dilemma, and yes, it’s one that most men would scoff at. 

Trust him when he says that he is so very aware of what is happening around him but he simply cannot manage to muster up the courage, strength, or confidence to admit to you, his lovely and patient girlfriend, that he’s dodging your advances solely because he is the text-book definition of virgin. 

He is not only nervous about having sex for the first time, but there also comes the weight of him either not being good enough when he tries, or you laughing in his face and mocking him for it.

You, on the other hand, wouldn’t be so fucking in your head if he really could just muster up a tiny amount of confidence to say that to you. 

It has been almost two months now since he asked you to be his girlfriend, and throughout this time never once has he done more than a gentle kiss to your lips or lying a slight guiding hand to your waist. It feels so… juvenile, so… middle school for a boyfriend to treat you this way. 

Seeing as how the first three dates you went on with him seemed to suggest he was more than willing to be a fulfilling boyfriend who can, hopefully, fill all of the roles that comes with the title– you’re starting to second guess that he ever liked you at all.

Perhaps the twenty-four year old man asked you that night to be his girlfriend out of pity. Or maybe he’s simply changed his mind about you. Regardless of the reason for why he acts like this, it’s getting to you.

Deeply, actually, by this point. It only stung a bit at first, but now it’s starting to feel like he has to be with you as a joke. Why else would he be consistent in wanting to hang out? Why else would he always be inviting you out on well-priced dates and buying you pretty gifts? 

It’s a joke. 

It has to be a joke. 

Oh, but that’s so far from the truth. If you would simply open your eyes, perhaps you’d notice the struggle that your polite little boyfriend goes through each time you try to suggest he make an advance on you. 

Even the slight kisses, it makes him suffer from embarrassment at how quickly his body reacts to you. 

He likes you so, so fucking much.

~

“I don’t think I’m feeling it today.” You respond to the muffled voice of your “boyfriend” on the phone, asking if he can come over to see you. 

“What? Why not?” He asks back, his voice concerned. 

“Do you want me to be honest?” You finally say with a long and annoyed sigh, giving up on any hope that this relationship will ever go any further than it already has. 

You’re fed up with feeling unwanted, undesired, and possibly even uninteresting. He’s the one person in your life that you care about when it comes to who you are and what you look like. His reaction, or lack thereof, regarding you as both a person and his girlfriend feels astonishing and does nothing more than make you question what it is that you’re doing wrong. 

It has to be you, right? Perhaps your body isn’t as pretty as he wants it to be, is that it? Or maybe your voice annoys him? God, what if he cringes thinking of how you’d move if he were to actually have sex with you? What if he doesn’t think about it at all? 

You pinch the bridge of your nose, trying not to let the intense insecurity weigh on you. You always promised yourself that you’d never let a man make you rethink your worth. 

You need to live up to that promise. 

“Chan, it’s been nice and all, but I think we should break up.” 

The silence he offers to you is entirely too loud, and feels more like a confirmation in your head that this is the exact choice you should be making right now. 

He’s thrown for a loop though, standing at his kitchen table staring off at the wall as you say those words. 

What did he do wrong? 

“Wha–” He cuts himself off, trying to find words to say. “What’s wrong? Did I do something?” 

You let out another breathy sigh, annoyed at the way he plays dumb. 

“I’m shocked you’re asking me that. I’ve been wondering if you were ever going to break up with me yourself, y’know?” You let out a sad little chuckle before you feel that insecurity he instilled in you burn against your eyes. “I’m just making it easy for you, so that you can go and spend your time with someone that you’d rather be around.”

He pauses, still dumbfounded by what you’re saying. 

“Why are you saying that?” He bellows out in a deeper tone, making you feel as though he’s angry with you now. “I’d rather be around you.” 

“Oh? Is that right?” You roll your eyes now, annoyed. “Is that why you push me away when I try to kiss you? Or what about– what about when you left the party last week after I sat on your lap?” 

Ah. He knew it. He knew he should have admitted it. Despite his consistent apologies for his body acting on instinct to run away from you, he should have really tried to see from your point of view rather than his own. Even if he only ran to hide the fact that he is horribly aroused by you at all times, in every given moment. 

You can hear a pained groan fall from his lips, and a door opening on his end. 

“I’m coming over.” 

He doesn’t let you protest, and instead hangs up the phone. You sit there in silence at his rejection of your break up. As if it were his choice? As if he had any say in it? You want to break up, that’s final. 

Still, that doesn’t explain why you don’t call him back to tell him not to come. It also doesn’t explain why your heart is thumping against your chest in anticipation.

Or, maybe there is something to explain why you’re feeling butterflies over his blatant refusal. Perhaps, this is the first time you’ve felt wanted by him? 

That also makes it worse. Why should your boyfriend make you feel this way only when you’re breaking up with him? Why can you only see that he cares when he’s faced with the idea of losing you? By the way he’s acting, you can argue that he wouldn’t be losing anything precious to him if you were to walk out of his life right this moment. 

Still, you sit here in wait. More curious now to see if maybe you'll figure out why he refuses to look at or touch you in a way that would show you he wants you.

~

The first thing Chan does when he steps through the door of your apartment is slip his shoes off. The second thing he does is stand there awkwardly, as if every thought left his head upon seeing your face.

You look like you’ve been crying. 

“This is my fault.” He says with a slight crack in his voice. “Because I keep hiding from you….right?”

You nod silently, remaining on your couch that faces his timid and stiffened figure. 

He stares at you, examining the consequences of his own actions. 

“You want to break up because I haven’t tried to, like, do things with you.” He winces as he says it, struggling to not feel awkward talking about having sex. He’s embarrassed, but would be even more embarrassed if he lost a girlfriend over this. 

“That’s not the only reason.” You shake your head, looking away from him and to your hands as you pick at your nail beds. “I’d be okay with no sex if you’d simply tell me why. The fact that you haven’t told me anything–” Your voice cracks a little bit, feeling stupid for being so emotional over such a short lived relationship. “It kind of destroyed my confidence.”

He watches the way you refuse eye contact, which is something that stabs him directly in the stomach. He can feel it drop to the floor, adrenaline making its way into that empty space you’re creating for him. 

“Before we break up, I just want to know why it took this for you to act like you genuinely might have feelings for me.” 

He stumbles over his thoughts the same way he stumbles over his feet trying to approach you. 

By now, he doesn’t think he can ever feel more embarrassed than he does at this moment. He crouches down in front of you, sad that you didn’t laugh at the way he nearly knocked himself out on your living room floor. Then he looks at you, chasing your line of sight as if to reassure you through nothing but the air in the room.

“I was afraid you’d laugh at me.” He starts, and after seeing that your expression doesn’t change even a little bit, he continues. “You seemed so into me that I–” He takes a deep breath, willing himself to be as honest as he can be. “I just didn’t know how to act.” 

You look at him with irritation at those words. 

“Of course I was fucking into you. Why else would I have agreed to be your girlfriend?” You roll your eyes, pushing yourself back into the couch cushions and away from his crouched body. “Think about how I feel. The fact that you just watch me throw myself at you time and time again? The fact that you rejected me every single time? How is that not giving you the answers you need as to why I’m breaking up with you?”

He takes note of that heightened voice of yours, defensive and likely more hurt than you’re letting on. 

“Listen–” He breathes in, trying to internally hype himself up to bite the bullet. 

You were listening, but he’s keeping whatever it is he’s thinking about in his head for just a second too long. 

“No, I think we’re done h-” 

“I’m a virgin.” He interrupts you, lowering his gaze to the floor and refusing eye contact with you. 

Your eyes shoot to him though. The last thing you would have expected was for him to be a–

“You’re–” You try to repeat his words for confirmation, but he interrupts you again. 

“I can promise you it’s not because I don’t want to do these things with you.” He says, still staring at the floor. “It’s because I was afraid that you’d lose interest over it.” 

Your mouth falls open as you look at him, every feeling of frustration in your body disappearing almost immediately. 

“It’s because I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to, like, be any good at it.” He continues to admit. “I was trying to work up the courage to tell you, or to just like, do it.” He rambles, now scooting back and standing up to his feet. “And if you still want to break up, I understand. I just thought I at least owed you an explanation.” 

You watch as he nods to himself in an unsure way, turns on his heel, and heads back to the door to slip his shoes back on. 

You sit in stunned silence as your brain erases every single insecurity you gained over this month and a half relationship before jumping to your feet. If anyone could have been more insecure about this than you were, it was him. And now that you can see that, the guilt hits you twice as hard as the presumed break up would have. 

“You’re a virgin?” You ask, though that wasn’t at all the words you intended to say. “I mean, you kept pushing me away because you didn’t want to disappoint me?”

He nods timidly, halting his body and still refusing to look at you. 

He has one shoe on, and his other foot half in the other when you make your way over to him, closing the distance quickly and confidently.

“Don’t leave.” You say first, before physically moving his body for him to remove that foot from his half-on shoe. “Chan, I’m your girlfriend. We can wait for as long as you need, I just...”

You pause, now feeling annoyed with yourself for making it about you. Then again, it’s not like you could read his mind. Though, thinking back to all of those instances where he pulled away from you before, perhaps you could have read context clues a little better. 

“I didn’t know–” You trail off, now determined to save the relationship that both of you accidentally started to sink. “Did I make you feel like you couldn’t tell me?”

He feels…relieved by your words. Saying you could wait, asking what it is that made him so afraid to admit it. 

Finally, he presses one foot against his other, pulling his foot out of his shoe and stepping back, looking at you with eyes fonder than you’ve ever seen them.

“It’s not that I felt I couldn’t tell you. I was just embarrassed.”

You very nearly coo out at him, but you keep your distance with both your words and your body now. 

“It’s not that I’m not ready to lose it. Especially with you.” He admits, glancing at you for a reaction before sighing. “I think I’ve been ready for a long time, again, I was just embarrassed and also knew that I should probably tell you at some point…”

“You want to give your virginity to me?”

You watch as he blows his hair up through puckered lips, rolling his eyes before smiling at you.

“It’s not that I view virginity as sacred or anything either. There’s just a lot of weight that people tend to put on it, and I wasn’t sure how you’d react.” He tries to explain as his body relaxes by the minute. “I wanted you to be my first time, yeah. When I asked you to be my girlfriend, I knew I wanted you to be the one to show me what all the hype is about.”

You’d laugh if it weren’t for the fact that this is still kind of a touchy subject. You’re not entirely sure how you feel about being someone’s first time, but you know you have feelings for him and to deny him of sex after you blatantly wanted it so bad from him…Okay, maybe you’re just in your head. Of course you’d be happy to be his first time. 

Ecstatic even. 

“So….” You sway on your feet, looking up at the ceiling before landing your eyes on him playfully. “It’s not because you think I’m disgusting or like, not living up to the standards you want for a girlfriend?”

“Jesus, no.” He says. 

You watch him scratch the back of his head, still probably embarrassed by how low this relationship had fallen due to the awful communication skills. 

“And you’re also kind of admitting that you have thought about it?” You continue, prying out the words you’ve wanted to hear so badly since you met him. 

He pulls back only a little bit, his cheeks warming at the words and the way his brain automatically thrusts him into the thoughts of all of those nights where he absolutely fucking thought about it. 

“Y-yeah. Yes. I have thought about it.” He nods in a self-reassuring way as his eyes land on everything in the room but you. 

You’re quick to give him your own reassurance though, trying to learn his boundary now that the secret is out and the relationship appears to have a second chance at succeeding. 

He can feel you close in on him, wrapping your arms around his middle and nuzzling your face against his neck. There, he holds you back, breathing in deep and feeling the scent of you wash through his body. 

Quite literally actually. As he would normally avoid, his lower half reacts far too quickly to even the simplest of touches from you. 

He pulls back on instinct, but you don’t release your grip this time. 

“You seem as ready as ever, I’ll admit.” You laugh upon feeling him stiffen against you, but you really do try not to shame him for it. “Still, we can wait until you feel ready enough to give it a shot, okay?”

He nods, entirely reassured by the way you don’t press up against it or comment any further about the happenings in his pants right now. Then he sighs out. 

“I can imagine I must look like an idiot right now, getting hard over a fucking hug.” He finally says as he pulls from the hug and makes his way back to your living room. “But we’re okay, right? You’re not breaking up with me?”

You follow after him, keeping your sexual distance, but absolutely indulging in the loving, sweet, and careful cuddling you’ve wanted to do with him for so long now. 

He appears comfortable when you tuck yourself under his arm and rest your head on his chest before answering him.

“I’m not breaking up with you,” You say, feeling his chest heave with each breath and intentionally ignoring the blatant tent in his pants slowly fall back into its flaccid position as he calms down. “It’s kinda cute, you know? That you were so worried about it.” 

His cheeks are still on fire, willing his body to calm itself through this sweet session of cuddling. He doesn’t want to ruin the moment with you, and still, it is embarrassing in the way he knows you’re ignoring it for his sake too.

But goddamn, how heavenly it would be for you to like, touch it right now…..or something. 

“Never thought of it as cute, if I’m being honest.” He tries to joke. “If anything, maybe it's a little pathetic on my part.”

You shake your head against him, feeling more confident of your place in his life. 

“Pathetic? Don’t be mean to yourself. Besides, it’s kind of hot knowing that you got so turned on over a simple hug.” You laugh, hoping you’re not crossing a boundary. “No wonder you ran so fast when I sat on your lap, I definitely would have felt that on me.”

“Alright, alright–” He tries to hush you of your playful remarks, but ultimately, if you really think it’s an attractive aspect of whatever sexual dynamic the two of you will come to have, he’s going to make damn sure you see just how fucking turned on you make him. 

~

Things are good. Great even, now that you can pin point each moment your boyfriend gets a little too overwhelmed with you. He does still push you away, probably out of instinct but he doesn’t shy away nearly as much from intimate moments with you. Especially if the two of you are alone together. 

You’re a bit more careful in public or with friends though, because the last thing you want to do is make him feel insecure about it. Still, there are playful moments where you indulge in the act of touching him or kissing him just to get him excited, just to watch him stutter his way through ordering something. 

The point is, you almost ended a relationship with someone who, arguably, makes you feel more wanted than you ever knew you could. It’s nice, and it feels good. 

Even now, this is only your second full on make-out session with him, you feel absolutely adored. It’s cute in the way he’s trying to train himself to not get hard at even the simplest of touches, it’s even cuter when his efforts fail miserably and he’s arching his body away from you as if he could even hide what he’s packing. 

You don’t push for more, despite wanting it badly. He also doesn’t push…despite also wanting it just as much as you do, if not more. He still seems to need a push of confidence to actually go any further than a nice, non-body touching makeout session. 

This is fine though, and you indulge far more than you ever knew you would when it comes to this kind of thing. As if simply licking into his mouth is foreplay enough to counter a fucking blowjob for him. 

Never in your life did you think you’d be this into the fact that your boyfriend is a virgin. And it’s not even that he’s never had sex, it’s that he seems to want it so bad, and there’s just something about a man who is desperate that gets you going these days. 

Still, kissing him is something that fulfills you, especially with the way he’s avoiding his lower half and keeping it away from you. 

He kisses you back in a telling way though, more telling than that tent in his sweatpants that you can visualize even while your eyes are closed. He radiates the arousal through the way he moves his lips against yours, and the way he lets out little suffering sounds when you kiss him harder and harder. 

His hands stay against your face, neck, and sometimes your waist, but god. His kissing is genuinely just so good with the way it tells on him every few seconds. 

And when he pulls back, he’s out of breath, flushed, and looking as if he would want nothing more than for you to hint, to lay down some sort of implication that he can cling to for relief from the heaviness that’s been in his pants since the fucking relationship started.

You wonder if tonight is the night, because he doesn’t appear to want to stop making out like he did last time. If anything, as he looks at you with those heaving breaths, you can tell he’s thinking harder than he ever has about it. 

“Chan,” You whisper out to him, just inches from his face. “Do you think of me?”

When he keeps his eyes on you, seemingly stunned by your question, you continue. 

“Do you think of me after you leave? When you’re all by yourself in your room–” You turn your head so that your eyes can trail to the space he is attempting to keep from you. “When you’re touching yourself?” 

He feels the words run straight through him, causing an utterly pathetic twitch in his pants. The way your voice comes out soft and sensual as you ask him, as you look at him. He doesn’t even remember words at this moment, not even a simple “yes”. 

He tries to answer by losing a little bit of his self control, turning your head back to him with his palm just so he can chase against your lips out of the sheer arousal, but you pull away. 

“Do you?” You continue, encouraging him to answer you. 

“So much,” He wills himself to whisper confidently, ignoring the fact that his body just forced him to rut up and against nothing, all for you to see. “Every time I leave,” He puts emphasis on his words. “Sometimes I can’t even make it home first.” 

You smile at the image of him rubbing against himself in his car, so desperate to relieve himself of what you do to him each time he comes to see you. Not even making it out of the seatbelt before releasing all over himself, all in his pants. Shaking, panting, all alone and without you. 

“Cute,” You chuckle, finally turning your head slightly and landing a pop kiss on him. “I think of you when I do it too, every time you leave.” 

He looks at you, willing his hips to stay put as he thinks about the image of you doing that in this very room, to images and thoughts of him. 

“You do?” He asks for reassurance easily.

“Mhm,” You look away from him as you sit straight up and then scoot down the bed. There, you lay yourself down against your pillows and look at him. “Come here.” 

He’s reluctant to take your hand. But even he can admit that this side by side makeout session is starting to hurt his neck, and you’re clearly asking him to get on top of you right now. 

“You don’t have to but, Chan–” You say, looking down, “I don’t want you to leave this time.” 

Well, shit, all you had to do was say that. Honestly, the way you look at him with pure acceptance is enough to push him past the wall in his head that keeps him from finally trying to take the next step. You accept him as he is now, surely you’d accept him if he…. doesn’t last, right? What about if he isn’t good at it? 

Still, he finds himself planting one hand on the other side of your head to balance himself on top of you. Still just hovering, not yet wanting or willing to, you know, put it against you. 

You smile. 

“It’s okay, I can tell you’re nervous. We don’t have to do anything else, I’m happy with just this.”

And then you both fall back into another, much more comfortable and natural feeling, makeout session. 

As much as you’d love for him to try and take control, his reluctance allows you to contain yourself. It allows you to respect him and his decision of whether or not he wants to do anything more than this. Still, this satisfies you. And if he really does stay, maybe he wouldn’t be entirely against watching you take care of your own arousal for him. Maybe he’d feel better watching even, taking notes on what you like, learning where to touch you. 

And you know, that really would have been okay but you can’t help but feel like he’s definitely wanting more. With the way his lips grow hungrier rather than more tired, with the way he’s starting to moan shamelessly into your mouth, with the way his hands are trying to travel to more intimate places on your body before stopping himself. 

You might be pushing it with the assumption, but it doesn’t hurt to try and help him, right?

When you feel his hands moving to your waist, up, up, and up until they’re just barely brushing against the underside of your breast, he pulls back again and pulls your shirt down to cover the exposed skin, all while kissing you harder.

You place your hand over his, wasting not even a second as you guide him back under your shirt, right up to where you know he wants to touch. 

And holy fuck does he. He doesn’t even pull back when you lay it against the warm and exposed flesh from under your shirt. His hand immediately starts groping. His lips immediately stutter against you in a relieved sigh from him, and all you can do is kiss him now with the same energy he seems to have in that one single hand. 

“You’re allowed to touch me, but if you need help doing it, just tell me–” You pull back to whisper, trying to take it another step further in the act of kissing against his jaw and down his neck. “I want to touch you too, but I’ll keep my hands to myself unless you tell me otherwise.”

It’s like he really forgets how to talk or give proper consent when his entire body is acting like a fucking greenlight for you right now. He feels so pathetic, on the verge of orgasm with nothing more than the soft fabric of his sweatpants to relieve him, and yet your breast in his hand, nipple hardening under his palm before he musters the courage to put it between his fingers, it’s a lot to take in, okay?

Still, he tries to say something, and he’s even more embarrassed by the way his voice sounds like it isn’t even his own. He sounds broken when the sound reaches his ears. 

“Don’t–” He starts, cutting himself off at the feeling of your lips kissing against the pulse point of his neck. 

“Hm?” You ask, pulling back and away, hoping you didn’t press too much. 

“Don’t stop.” He mutters out again, a little less embarrassed now that he feels you sigh against that same pulse point with the way his fingers fondle your nipple mindlessly. “Don’t keep your hands to yourself.”

Your brain falls into a stunned silence at his words, bringing a type of nervousness to bubble up in your own body. Is this really it? Is this when it’s going to happen? On a saturday night, against your pillows, muffled cartoons playing in the background…..past ten in the evening? 

You can’t help it as you kiss against his neck. You really can’t, with the way he opens himself up to be vulnerable with you while actively being on top of you, while playing with your breasts, while containing himself.

He seems to need you to do the pushing, but you really cannot shake the nervousness of being his first. You’re almost certain he is nervous about so many things, but still he appears to be eager to try. He’s eager to be with you, and, ultimately, to know what it feels like to be with another person that matters to him in that way. 

“Is there–” You stop, breath caught in your throat, only to fall out against his throat when he finally seems to have the confidence to make his first move. One that would seem so small to anyone else, but he– he raises a hand and holds the back of your neck, trying to press your lips and guide them to the area of his neck that he wants you to kiss. 

And you do, with blatant encouragement to him for doing that, all while trying to finish your previous thought. 

“Is there anything you want me to do for you?” You ask, kissing and now, licking against the spot on his neck that makes him shiver. 

He sighs in a shudder, craning his neck to expose more skin for you before his hand stills against your nipple and he pulls his hand from your shirt. 

“All of it?” He starts, a bit unsure of himself. “Everything?” He adds, pulling himself back from your lips and watching you fall back to your pillows. He leans his body up, relieving his legs from his weight and sitting on his heels in front of you, only slightly between your legs now. 

You can see that he has a bit more confidence with the way he’s looking at you. 

“I want to try all of it.” He continues, placing two hands on your knees, pushing your legs together and using his palms to make them sway left and right. It’s as if he’s thinking hard. “I mean, if you want to.”

You smile. 

You want nothing more than to do this with him, for him, and for yourself. 

“Yeah?” You ask for confirmation, now lifting yourself and re-positioning yourself onto your knees to mimic his own stance. 

He nods in a blatant and shy way, knowing that you can physically see how badly he wants this, and how badly he wants you to be the one to do this with him. He’s achingly hard, and he isn’t sure if he’s ever managed to get this fucking hard in his entire life.

It really is painfully arousing, with the way his pants stretch against the head when he’s sitting like this. The way the fabric offers little to no sensation but while looking at you, he feels all fucked up and warm. He tries to forget that there’s precum all over him, seeping through the pants that are presented before you, and god, the way you look right at it. 

He doesn’t shy away despite being as shy as he could possibly be right now. In fact, when your eyes trail back up to him, licking your lips before smiling, he a fucking goner. He knew he wanted you bad, but never did he know he needed you this badly. 

He’s so fucking lucky. 

“It looks… big.” You comment, leaning forward only slightly and sizing your boyfriend up. “But for your sake, I’ll try to control myself from moving too fast. I’ll go slow, okay?”

He doesn’t even nod, he’s too entranced with you in front of him, fully clothed, lifting his own shirt off of him as if he is incapable of doing it himself. Then again, he kind of is incapable at this moment. He swears his IQ must’ve dropped to a single digit by this point. 

And when that shirt comes up and over his head, you note that he doesn’t even blink. That small moment where his face was obscured as you pulled it off of him? His eyes stayed on you both before and after, only now– his hair is a total fucking mess and all you can do is feel endeared by it. 

“God, you’re so fucking attractive,” You groan in sexual frustration with an eyeroll. “I can’t believe someone hasn’t jumped your bones yet.”

Now he breaks eye contact at the praise, glancing away from you and trying his hardest not to smile like an idiot at those words. 

“To be fair, I’ve fucked up my fair share of relationships being embarrassed.” He laughs. “Kinda glad I did though.”

You land your eyes back on him, staring blankly at his naked chest and trying your damnedest not to look at him like he’s some piece of meat. But goddamn, the body of this man. 

“Come here, switch places with me.” You smile, reaching forward and trying not to think too hard about the way his arms flex when you grip them to move him. “Here, lay back.” 

And within seconds, you’re between his legs and looking down at his half-lidded, arousal driven eyes. 

“Fuck, really?” You groan again, glancing away. “It’s really taking everything in me, Chan, it really is.”

His heart is doing flips as he stares up at you. He feels doted on, adored, attractive. So he encourages more of those annoyed praises from you. 

“Taking everything in you to…?” 

You chuckle, because the audacity of this drunk and in love fool. 

“Do you have any idea how badly I’ve wanted to be in this exact position?” You smile, reaching down to run your fingers down his chest and straight to that happy trail that he so readily hid from you. “It’s taking everything in me to slow down–”

“Then don’t.” He says proudly, albeit still a bit shy at your words. 

You can see how red his ears are, only partially hidden by that head of messy ass hair. His stupid pretty eyes and gentle smile are directed straight at you without any type of reluctance. 

“There’s my confident boyfriend.” You chuckle, toying with the hair beneath his belly button and trying to not comment on the way his body jumps a bit at the feeling. “Was wondering where he went after he asked me to be his girlfriend.”

And he remains silent after that, watching the way you take the reins and lean down to kiss against that same spot of his neck. Warm breath fanning over the skin before attaching yourself there. 

Surely you can feel the way his hips react, humping up at each flutter of your lips. If you couldn’t, he knows for a fact that you’ll be able to now. With the way you trail down, across his own sensitive nipples, and then down, down, down. 

He glances down at you at the same time when you glance up at him and right then and there he thinks he melts. He’s never seen a woman look at him from this angle, and it’s only a little bit detrimental to his heavy and pathetic cock. The twitching never stops, he feels so fucking sticky in his pants and it really just doesn’t stop. Continuous leaking, and he really had no idea that there could even be this much pre-cum. 

Then, he’s pulled out of his thoughts with….a tickle?

“Oh?” You smile, leaning down to repeat that lick up his happy trail before landing a kiss straight on his belly button. 

His body jumps again, and he lets out a moaned chucked unintentionally. 

“Oh.” You smile wider, gripping both of his hips with your hands and holding him down in a playful way. Repeating the act once again. 

Your suspicions are confirmed with a third jump of his body, and another chuckled, frustrated moan. 

“So, he’s ticklish too?” You say with another kiss against his belly button before fluttering your fingers at the side of his hips. 

His entire body goes rigid before melting against the bed in an attempt to not react to the way you take advantage of a hidden weakness he had. God, he should have known that…like, sex stuff could be ticklish. 

“No– I’m not.” He lies, jolting again when you continue to test the resilience he thinks he has against your lips and fingers. “Hey–!”

And, well, you would’ve stopped if it weren’t for the fact that his hips raise with each tickled sensation, and you can genuinely feel how damp and heavy he is in his pants. It’s entirely arousing in the way its weight is obvious through his attempts to wiggle from your ticklish touches. 

“Alright,” You finally relent, landing one final kiss to his belly before licking down that same line of hair he offers his body. “Chan, I want to–”

His hips immediately raise to your words, the wetness from your tongue feels like ice against his skin when the air hits it and at this point, he thinks he knows what you’re suggesting. 

“Please–” He nearly cries out in a stutter. “Touch it.”

You smile as you nuzzle your nose against his abdomen before giving him a short nod that you know he doesn’t see. Considering, well, he just threw his arm over his face and keeps his hips tensed, and his ass only slightly lifted off of the bed. 

Desperate. Willing. 

You prepare yourself for seeing it for the first time by not seeing it at all just yet. Instead, you kiss down until your lips are met with warm, damp fabric. Immediately you can feel his length twitch under your lips when you reach it, and all you can manage to do is flatten your tongue out and against it to feel it pulse again. 

And again, until that same arm thrown over his face reaches down in a desperate attempt to take the pants off for you. He’s the one losing his self control now, no embarrassment or nervousness in sight from him, and it’s so fucking attractive to see him do it.

His shaking fingers fumbling with the waistband, shoving the pants down just an inch or so more to reveal more of that trimmed hair.

You don’t comment on the way he’s acting out of fear that it’ll make him feel shamed or even mocked, despite you truly believing it might just be the hottest thing you’ve ever seen a man do in front of you. 

Instead, you help him. Sinking your own fingers beneath his pants and tugging them down all in one go before allowing your eyes to land on it. 

“Jesus fucking christ.” He moans out, the air alone offering an overwhelming amount of sensation due to the temperature change he now feels between his legs. 

You finally look at it, so dark in color. As if all of the blood in his body resides only here. You gently move your hand just over it, feeling the heat radiate from him, seeing the precum continuously dribble from the head, and then, finally– 

“You’re so….” You trail off, in awe of the way his body just….keeps reacting. So much pre-cum. “Hard.” 

He releases a broken little sound at the feeling of your fingers finally touch him, and it feels insanely different from when he touches it himself. As if he’s not in control of his pleasure, and it’s all just you. You are the one who feels good against him. 

You’re shocked briefly when his hand makes it’s way back down to yours, grabbing it and essentially trying to get you to stimulate him more. He puts so much pressure against your hand, sandwiching it between his own palm and stiffened cock. 

You’re tuly in awe. This man has essentially edged himself to a world record, surely. 

“Slow down,” You try to soothe him, moving your hand against him and watching him retract his hand. “Relax, It must feel good, right?”

That little sob he lets out shows you his frustration. So needy, so ready. And even with you moving your fingers to circle his pulsing length, his hips continuously fuck up, not allowing him to have even a moment without a forceful amount of stimulation. 

“So good,” He moans, entire brain focused on what your hand is doing and unable to open his eyes. “I want it so bad.”

You don’t think he hears you chuckle and you’re thankful he doesn’t. You can imagine he would genuinely be embarrassed to know you’re witnessing his pure blissed-out and aroused-state of mind right now. 

And it’s not shocking that he’s entirely focused on himself at this moment, because he’s the one experiencing this for the first time. Even if you find it hard to believe that another woman has never touched his dick, you’re entirely flattered that it very well may be the case and that he wanted you to be the one to make him feel this good. 

“I’ll give it to you, just relax. I’m not going to stop.” You reassure his needy movements, and the way his body squirms at the slightest of touches. “What feels good?”

God, he’s so frustrated. 

“All of it.” He groans shortly, trying to take in a deep breath and just relax like you asked him too. 

You nod to his closed eyes and slacked mouth, fighting against his hips to be the one to pleasure him rather than himself and only when you blow a gentle breath against the head of his cock do his hips still and he shoots his hands up to your pillows, gripping them as if he’s preparing for something. 

You watch intently at the way he’s actively fighting to move now, waiting impatiently for you to do something now. Licking his lips, chewing on his bottom lip– god, he’s so pretty up there. 

Then, you grant him a new sensation. Only because by this point you’re the one who is about to lose control. 

You stick out your tongue and lick all the way from his balls to the head of his cock, making sure to keep pressure against it so that you can taste all of the arousal he’s spilled up until now. And while you were going to pull back to examine his reaction, this is the part where you release your self control.

The taste alone was enough to have you moaning, vibrating your voice against the vein of his length and then circling your lips around the head. 

Instantly, you suck at the feeling of pre-cum still pouring out of him. This time, there seems to be more. Coating your tongue with an almost sweetened salty taste. 

You feel briefly the way his hips chase the new warmth, clearly wanting to tuck itself into your mouth and quite possibly, down your throat, but you pull back and blow once again against the head. 

His entire body shivers as you glance up at him. 

You can barely comprehend just how into you he looks right now before rolling your own eyes in arousal at the image before immediately giving him everything your mouth has to offer.

Who cares if he comes too fast? Fucking look at him. You’d be stupid not to suck the absolute life out of him! That’s your boyfriend up there, chewing on his bottom lip, eyes sparkling through hooded lids, chest heaving–

And god, you almost wish he wasn’t as big as he is because it’s difficult to keep your eyes open when you take it in. You have to focus on sliding it through your lips, against your tongue, and right up to the back of your throat where the head of his cock bumps.

He can feel the way your fingers grip his legs through it, and by this point he has gone entirely non-verbal at the feeling. 

The only sound he can make comes from deep within his chest, and he can only release those sounds with heaved out and rigid breaths. His heart is pumping faster and faster the deeper you managed to take him, and–

“Ah! W-wait!” He panics, sitting straight up and becoming fucking floored at the way you stay on him. Moving your hands to his stomach and trying to shove him back. “Fuck,” He seethes as he takes in a sharp inhale, legs shaking as he flops back against the pillows. “Fuck, i’m sorry.” He continues to murmur, feeling himself hit the wall of orgasm and practically pulverize it. 

And you, oh, you. You taste it. You feel the twitching and the way his muscles stiffen under your fingers. You can hear him muttering apologies as it spills into your mouth, down your throat, and even out of the corners of your lips. 

You try to take all of it, up until you can’t fucking breathe, and only then do you pull up and replace your mouth with your hand, watching in awe at the way he just……

It doesn’t fucking stop. 

He went from rigid to stammering his words, to now blatantly and full-on moaning through both the pleasure and frustration of losing the warmth of your mouth. 

“God, Chan….” You whisper in a raspy voice, slowing your hands and intentionally pumping it out of him by now. 

“I’m sorry–” He stammers, body still shaking as you pull the rest of it out of him. “I tried to,” He winces with another unintentional moan. “I didn’t think it would feel that good.”

You smile both proudly and fondly, watching him stumble through his words and whatever excuse he tries to come up with. 

“I don’t think you know how hot you look right now.” You finally say, in a more stern voice. “You couldn’t have stopped me if you wanted to.” 

Only now, when he’s absolutely drenched himself in his release does he open his eyes in a drowsy way. He looks at you and that little smile on your lips and decides that, yeah, he can believe you. He trusts you, and he’s entirely obsessed with you. 

“But we still haven’t–”

You cut him off quickly.

“We have all night. All day tomorrow. All week, month, year. I don’t care.” You dead-pan, reaching for his, somehow, still hard length. “Chan.” You add, gripping it and testing the actual hardness of it. “You’re still hard, which is fucking amazing by the way, and you have no idea how wet I am right now.”

Oh, my god. He forgot. 

“You– you’re turned on?” He asks, looking away from you. 

“So fucking turned on.” You confirm for him, now releasing his length to give him a bit of a rest, considering he must not realize he’s still shaking. “Look, feel.” 

You say it as you crawl up and on top of him, seating yourself right up against his abdomen and grabbing his hand. 

He just stares, watching you guide his hand straight to the seat of your shorts. 

“Oh.” He sighs out. 

“Even through my shorts. See? Feel it.” You continue to move his hand against you, trying not to rut your own hips up much like he was doing before. 

Brain malfunction. He doesn’t even have a fucking IQ at this point as his cock immediately reacts in all of it’s sensitive, pathetic glory. 

“Do you want me to, um,” He swallows around a breath he didn’t know he needed. “touch you? Can I try?”

You sigh, relieved that he’s willing and immediately push yourself off of him and take care of all of the busy-work as quickly as possible. ie: taking off your clothes.

Unfortunately, you somehow briefly forgot that the man is still a fucking virgin. You can very nearly see his mouth fall open at your nude body being revealed to him. Even more so, you can see the dribble of saliva that he doesn’t quite catch fast enough, and his cock reacts. 

“You’re so cute, god.” You praise with the same compliment you’ve been giving him all night. 

And when you seat yourself next to him, hugging one of his arms and tucking it between your legs before closing your thighs around it, you smile at him and the way he literally cannot stop staring with his mouth agape. 

“Babe, you’re drooling.” You chuckle, shifting your hips a bit to rub yourself against his knuckles, where you’re still hugging his arm. 

Only then does he slurp up his embarrassment and try to remain calm. His fogged brain comes back to him quickly upon your comments as he wills himself to sit up beside you. 

He gets to….touch you. 

And boy does he. 

Eagerly, messily, and quite frankly, kind of embarrassingly. 

You make it easier for him though, laughing as you flop back and spread your legs for him. He’s quick to simply…explore. He’s not aiming for any singular area of your pussy because to be quite honest, he’s still struggling to stop staring at the entirety of you. 

You watch his eyes, the way they stare at your tits, then your thighs, your pussy being petted by his fingertips, and then– eye contact. 

He seems so sure of himself despite still managing to barely touch the clit. It doesn’t bother you one bit, because his eager fingers still find ways to touch you beautifully. There’s so much intent behind the messy movements. 

Slipping and sliding two fingers between your lips, up your folds, and then stopping just short of your clit before sliding back down and feeling where his cock would go if he manages to make it this far. 

I mean, surely he will, right? He’s losing his virginity as he does this right now, even. Foreplay still counts, right? 

And then, after several minutes of him exploring, learning, and practically teasing you half to death, you reach down to guide him. 

“Right here,” You soothe out in a soft voice, pressing his fingers against your clit and seeing him take note of it. “And here.” You trail his fingers down until they reach your clenched hole, and you very slightly press against his fingers so that the tips just barely enter you. 

He tilts his head at you, concentrating on where you lead him before releasing his hand and essentially leaving him to his own devices now. 

And you know, he did tell you he was a quick learner, because almost immediately he’s experimenting with putting a finger into you, and using his other hand to find a rhythm to rub against your clit. 

The whole time, he checks for your reaction, noting when your breathing hitches and when your body tenses. He continues, trying to only do things that make your body react and soon, you’re already turning to mush beneath him.

His fingers circle and tap your clit at a quick pace, with the other twisted inside of you. When he slides his finger out, and then back in, he rubs your clit harder, and god, yeah. Okay. You see his effort, and it’s such a good fucking effort too.

“Feels good,” You finally moan out for him, allowing yourself to give in to the pure arousal of the entire situation taking place. Thinking hard about what it would feel like to have such a desperate cock inside of you. “Use two fingers?” 

He listens instantly, moaning along with you when he slides the other in with the next thrust. His fingers against your clit trail down shortly after, curiosity getting the best of him when he spreads your lips open to see you stretch around his fingers. 

“It’s so warm–” He comments more to himself than to you, watching the way you pulse around him, watching the way your slick seeps out of you. It’s so hot for him to see it up close like this, and his pace slows at the image before him. “Can you take more than two?”

You lift your head in amazement at how he could ask such a thing. 

“Chan.” You smile at the way he jumps in surprise at your sudden, louder voice. Fingers nearly slipping out of you. “I can take way more than just two fingers.” You glance down between his legs. “Way, way more.”

He glances down to what you’re looking at before letting out an embarrassed sob.

“You’re really going to let me?” He nearly whines in excitement. 

You nod, reaching for him and pulling him to you by his shoulders. You land a kiss against his lips, trying not to shake at the way his fingers angle different inside of you as he moves to chase your lips.

“Mhm,” You soothe against his lips, intentionally scooting your hips down to your best ability to sink his fingers into you more. “Move your fingers– it feels good like this.”

He listens, feeling you throw your arms around his neck and cling to him through it, all while moaning and groaning right up against his lips. You’re not even kissing him, you’re just….acting like this and it’s fucking great.

He thought he would be the only one to be desperate in this situation, yet here you are, clinging to him as he works his fingers in you. 

“When?” He finally asks upon noting the way you start to move your hips against his fingers. 

You peek your eyes open and pull back to look at him. 

“Now? Do you want to do it now?” 

He nods, slipping his fingers out of you and inspecting how wet they’ve become. 

“Can I?” 

You finally fall back, leaning against your elbows and spreading your legs wide in front of him. Lending him a nod, you watch the way he just freezes after the fact. 

All you can do is laugh at this moment with the way he loses any ability to remember how sex works. 

Then again, you wonder if he ever even watched porn, considering how he’s acting and couldn’t manage to find the clit. 

“Do you want me to be on top?” You question, blinking up at him and his blank expression.

He shakes his head at you, still frozen in his spot before his eyes slowly make their way down to the glistening sheen against your pussy. 

“Don’t we like, need a condom or something? I can’t promise I’ll be able to pull out.” He asks, finally glancing away. “I don’t know if I can last as long as you want me to….”

And with that, all you do is lunge forward, grab your boyfriend by the cock, and pull him to you. 

He laughs, you laugh, and then it’s silent when he leans over you, feeling his length lay against your core, already feeling spent but so, so ready to give himself to you. 

“I’m on birth control. You don’t need to pull out.” You smile evilly, wiggling your hips and watching the way he closes his eyes tightly as if to regain his composure of those words. 

“I’m seriously in love with you.” He mutters, pushing his hips forward and letting his length slide through the mess he made of you. 

You smile, feeling that by this point, your face may actually be stuck like this permanently, and lift your head to kiss against his lips once more. 

“You’re ready?” You ask quietly, against his lips. “I can help you adjust to where it needs to be. After that, I want you to do what feels best for you, okay?”

He nods timidly, taking in a deep and nervous breath before feeling your hand guide his length to the opening. 

“Go on, slide in it.” You encourage him. 

And he does. 

Slowly at first, gently, until he feels your wet hot walls envelop the head of his cock in full, clenching, pulling him in. 

His arms shake from either side of your head as he balances himself there, and it doesn’t take long for him to drop his head against your shoulder in deeper breaths than he was taking before.

The sensation is so much, it’s no wonder people like to have sex. It’s so good, you feel so, so good around him. He can’t help it when he slides in deeper, not stopping until he’s releasing a wet moan against your shoulder and holding onto you as if his life depends on it. 

He thought that once he got it all the way in, it would get easier. But it doesn’t. Even as the two of you are unmoving, with your hands in his hair and soothing him through it, you still clench him. Your pussy still stimulates it without either of you doing a damn thing.

You on the other hand, won’t admit to struggling through that one, long and languid thrust inside of you. It felt as if he was splitting you open despite how wet you already were, and still are. The heaviness, the consistent twitching, all of it stretches you out more than you even knew you’d need and god, it feels so good to have him just hold onto you like, to have him adjust to the feeling. 

He’s no longer a virgin, and that’s not even what matters right now. 

What matters is the way he continuously nuzzles his nose against you, snaking his head to your neck and moaning consistently against your ear when he manages to finally move. 

He pulls out only a little bit before his hips stutter at the sensitivity, then he pushes back in. 

In and out, in and out, until–

“Fuck.” He moans, lifting suddenly from your neck, sitting up, staring directly  at where his cock sits inside of you, and he just… lets go.

Knuckles white against the grip of your waist, he powers through the sensitivity, he fucks through it. Fast, with no real rhythm or ability to realize just how deep he’s pushing himself into you, and then….

He’s done for. 

“That’s it,” You encourage him through half moans at the feeling, your swollen clit begging for a little bit of attention too. “Shit, Chan, that’s it.” You continue, losing yourself in his reaction to you. 

He only moves faster, his hips only stutter more, and thank fuck he already came once because he wouldn’t have made it a solid inch into you before coming undone if he hadn’t. Now though? He’s pleasantly surprised to be lasting even this long. 

Until he’s not, of course. 

And there, between your legs, he presses in as far as he can reach and loses his breath. 

Eyes rolling back, eyebrows furrowing, mouth agape, a deep moan rumbles from his chest as his shiver flows through his body at the first release inside of you.

You immediately shoot your hands to your clit, feeling it pump inside of you much like it did in your mouth. Already so much, you feel entirely full, and entirely ready if he can manage to keep coming for as long as he did before. 

You fingers assault the swollen nub so fast, working yourself up much like you would during a quick session of masturbation, not wanting him to miss out on what it feels like to have a girl come on him– 

It hits you faster than you can realize. 

Even when he buckles and falls back to your chest out of breath, you can’t even tell him that it’s happening. 

Thankfully, he doesn’t move just yet. Well, until he feels your pussy clench him tigher than before. In a rhythmic way, almost. 

Only barely can he lift his head to watch you, and that’s when he notes that you’re holding your breath. 

You pussy is pulsing, and then–

“Are you?” He questions, experimenting with the idea of trying to thrust into you as he asks. 

There’s the breath you’d been holding. 

“Yes!” You call out, both to answer his question and to appreciate that little thrust he gave you.

Even if his cock is slowly becoming flaccid, you’re still full, and he can still feel the orgasm wash over you. 

He’s silent through it, wincing at his hyper-sensitive cock and very nearly cursing it out for not having waited just a minute longer to release– then, you’re hugging him. 

Tightly. So tightly, you’re holding onto him and breathing into his hair. He can barely breathe himself with this hold you have on him. Still, he doesn’t fight it, he simply lets you. 

Letting you cling, letting the last jolting pulses of your core push the rest of him out of you. There, he manages to lift from your weakening grasp and throw himself beside you. 

Out of breath, sweating, a total mess, he looks at you like he truly will never be able to love another person the way he does right now. 

And it falls silent for a long while before you roll over, throwing both an arm and leg over him. 

“Man,” You sigh out. “How does it feel?” You ask this time, opening your eyes to playfully look at him.

“Huh? What?” He asks, quirking a brow. 

“You know, now that you’re not a virgin anymore. How does it feel?” 

He thinks hard for like two seconds before taking in a deep breath and smothering himself against the top of your head. 

“Like I’m in love with you, maybe.”

And you know, given that this relationship is barely even considered one in the eyes of most people. You don’t think you care. 

“Because I made you feel good, or because you want to let me make you feel good for like…” You pause, lifting your head to look him in the eye. “the rest of your life?”

He doesn’t even have to think twice. 

“The second reason.” 

“You’re such a simp, Chan, really.” You joke, skewing your head fondly to look at him. “But I think it’s worth a shot.”

~

Chapter two: LOSER. [wonwoo] ― coming soon!

series m.list

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Please write the reader is dating Steve, she is getting bullied by tommy h and carol because they don’t approve of her and Steve finds out and steps in to stop it

Mess with you [S. H]

Steve Harrington x reader

Word count: 3.2k

A/N: I admit that I hate Steve this season for being so impulsive and dumb, but come on, he's a good guy deep down.

You opened your locker to take out a couple of books while enduring the lump in your throat from what had just happened.

Tommy and Carol were best friends with your boyfriend, Steve, so you were practically forced to talk to them every time there was a meeting. But the rest of the time you did your best to avoid them. Your boyfriend was popular: basketball team, rich family, pretty face. And of course they were too, but… it felt like they were opposites. Steve liked to joke around and could be annoying at times, but the hideous couple were evil for fun.

And you were one of their favorite targets.

“Y/N!” Carol said, with a hypocritical smile, as she reached out to put her arms around you.

“Huh, hello…”

"How's our favorite bookworm?" Tommy scoffed, as he snatched away the notebook you'd been trying to shield against your chest. “Wow, chemistry. I just need a couple of notes on that subject to improve my grade” she said with that same annoyed tone. It wasn't the first time they'd done this to you and now that you were Steve's girlfriend it was more common for them to steal most of your homework and projects.

"Are you going to the party tonight, dear?" she asked, playing with your hair and noisily chewing the cherry gum in her mouth.

"I can't, I have to study for my algebra test"

“Oww, did you hear, Tommy? She has to study,” she scoffed, hearing her boyfriend chuckle. Then she turned her attention to you, with that cruel smile she had most of the time. "If you keep leaving our Steve alone at every party, he'll soon be looking for another sapling to party with, you know?" Carol exclaimed. It was also not the first time that she brought up the subject, cementing insecurity towards your relationship.

You weren't much of a party girl, especially when there were so many homework assignments and exams on the way. In addition, your parents were a bit (too) protective, so adding these two factors it was almost impossible for you to leave your house. Of course your boyfriend and his friends weren't the least bit interested in grades and their parents weren't even paying attention to them, so every time someone organized a meeting they were there. Steve had tried to drag you into most of them, but at some point he just gave up and stopped pushing. But the next day Carol and Tommy always commented on how many girls had made advances to the boy and also remarked how beautiful they were. That was driving you crazy.

"Steve wouldn't do that"

“You can believe that if he gives you comfort” was all she said as she shrugged and patted you on the cheek.

Teasing was something you were used to, but on that particular day it seemed to affect you more than usual. The words didn’t stop echoing in your head and the doubt had been implanted in you. Did Steve really love you enough to deal with all your limitations? Hell, you guys hadn't even done… that. Maybe they were right and your boyfriend would end up getting bored having the love of a virgin know-it-all.

“Hey” you heard behind you, making you jump and when you turned around you noticed that it was Steve, who was smiling sweetly at you.

“Hi” you answered, feeling strange all of a sudden. You had never dared to tell him about the mistreatment you received from his friends, maybe because you were too scared that he would judge you crazy and decide to break up with you.

"How are you? Besides pretty, of course” he complimented, making you smile that didn't quite touch your eyes.

"I'm fine" you lied, moving closer to hug him and kiss him on the lips. The contact felt sincere and warm and comforting.

“I want to ask you if you would mind lending me your chemistry notebook, love. The other day the teacher erased the formulas too quickly and I couldn't copy them. I promise not to steal anything” he said, showing you both outstretched palms as a show of sincerity. You swallowed hard, not knowing what excuse you could come up with, and Steve seemed to notice your discomfort.

“I forgot my notebook at home” you lied.

“But you never forget anything. Also today we have chemistry” he replied. It was true, your lie was very poor and you knew it perfectly. You could have at least pretended to look for it, but it didn't occur to you until after you said it.

"I know, but today I woke up a little more distracted than usual" you continued. Steve wasn't satisfied with the answer but he still let it slide.

“Is it okay if I pick you up after school? You know, to take you home. And on the way we can get to buy an ice cream or whatever you want” he murmured. Those things were what made you fall in love. At least with you he was very accommodating, in every way. And sure, you two were a couple of hormonal teenagers, but that didn't stop you from having these little moments of romance.

"I'd love to Steve"

"Great," he murmured, grinning at you and then leaning in to steal another kiss. That was another quality of Steve, he kissed you at any time in any place "See you later, yes?"

“See ya,” you replied, watching him walk down the hall to join Tommy and Carol in the distance, who gave you a dirty look. You sighed and swallowed your pride as you closed your locker, starting to walk into your next class.

Steve kept his promise and took you home after school, but the feeling that something was wrong with you lingered throughout the day. He didn't know the reason, but he could notice that there were fewer and fewer smiles you gave him and it seemed that you were trying hard to keep silent. He wanted to know if he was doing something wrong and was even contemplating the possibility that you wanted to break up with him.

Steve had a reputation as a heartthrob, but the truth was that when he was with someone he became the most faithful, sweet, and protective person. Yes, he was quite a flirt, but he always flirted with single girls when he was single. He had loyalty to your relationship and maybe it was too soon to conclude, but he was dead serious with you. He could see himself a couple of years later helping you find colleges to get into and cheering you on as you studied. That was something that didn't bother him at all, your passion for school and your dedication to being the best in the class. It was something he admired about you and even (for just one crazy second) he thought about how smart his children would be if you were their mother. That's why the matter kept going around in his head, because he was thinking of a way to talk to you to clarify what was happening to you.

“Steve!” a girl called him, which she left in the armchair in which he was. He had gone to the party, but he wasn't enjoying himself at all; he had just sat in a corner to lose himself in her thoughts of him.

"Hello, Tiffany," she replied. She was a pretty girl, with messy hair and bright eyes.

“You look so sad, pretty,” she murmured, slurring her words. It was obvious that she was drunk. "I could fix that…" she laughed, leaning cheekily to try and kiss him. But Steve quickly moved out of the way.

"What the hell? You know I have a girlfriend” he complained, while he held the teenager by the shoulders to stop any further movement.

"I thought you were done with that prude already" she explained to him, without a hint of shame for having thought of going so quickly to him and not for having called you that way.

“Y/N and I are still dating,” he answered, still with a firm voice.

"But she doesn't have to find out," insisted the girl, with a flirtatious smile. Steve began to notice several things: a girl was trying to convince him to cheat on you, the music was too loud, and the combined smell of alcohol, sweat, and weed was completely off-putting. But the most important thing was that he should not be there, but be with you.

Without answering anything, he got up from his place, leaving the girl alone and confused, to start walking in the direction of the exit.

"Hey man!" Tommy called out to him, from a distance, as if he had been watching him previously. "Are you leaving so soon?"

“I have something to do” was all he said, gathering up his coat and throwing it over his back to head out the front door. Tommy didn't care (perhaps because he was already too drunk) so Steve was able to get in his car and drive calmly. It was already late, but everything in him told him that he needed to see you. He could sneak in through the window, he'd done it before, and maybe see you for a couple of minutes or ask you to kiss him. He hadn't drunk that much, but enough to make him dizzy when he pulled up on the street in front of your house. He didn't want to wake up your parents, they would kill you if they found out and they would kill him along the way, so as quietly as possible he managed to get up to your window.

Just as he was about to touch the glass, he saw you sitting up in bed with lots of tissues scattered on the mattress and your purple phone to your ear.

"It's just that I can't, Nance" he managed to hear, while he hid by the window to find out what was happening "I'm getting sick of all this, I can't even sleep peacefully anymore" you sobbed. Steve could bet all the drunkenness had left his body. There was silence and then you spoke again "Today they took my chemistry notes and that bitch insists on making me see that I'm little to him" your voice sounded low, so Steve had to get a little closer "Every day they make fun of me, they call me horrible names and I can't say anything because they're Steve's best friends and I know he's going to prefer them over me. It's simple logic” the boy's brain clicked when he heard you: Tommy and Carol “Always… they always tell me that Steve can get someone better than me whenever he wants. And I think they're right, I'm so insignificant that I'll never be able to date someone just like him, but he can date dozens just like me" you said, with tears leaking between your words "I'm afraid he'll get bored of me and left me… I couldn't stand it”

That was enough information for him. Maybe he wasn't the smartest, but he knew how to tie up loose ends, and right now he had come to a conclusion: you were this weird because of Carol's harassment, who had put ideas into your head to make you feel miserable in the relationship. Tommy had probably been the one to say that you and he weren't together anymore and that's why he'd noticed when he got up ignoring Tiffany. They had hurt you, and when he had that revelation his whole body was filled with rage.

Wasting no time, he got down from where he was and walked with firm steps back to his car, to drive through the same streets he had just walked a moment ago. All the way he was gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white and his jaw was clenched, feeling betrayed and annoyed. You had been hurt and he wasn't going to take that.

"Dude!" He was greeted by one of the guys, who were already drunk, but Steve completely ignored him to go straight to Tommy, who was near the pool.

“Steve?” he asked, grinning as he saw that his friend of his had returned. But that same smile was erased by Steve's fist smashing hard against his cheek "What the fuck?!"

"Do you think you can make fun of my girlfriend?" Steve asked. He had never won a fight, but the rage coursing through him might be incentive enough to win this one. Also, Tommy was drunk and that was a big plus. "Do you think you can rough her up and I won't do anything?" he said, unleashing another punch and knocking the boy to the ground.

"What the hell are you doing Steve?" Carol yelled hysterically.

“And you shut up! Be thankful that he would never hit a woman or you would be like him too” he threatened, pointing a finger at her. Everyone present was stunned by the scene and Steve didn't realize that Tommy had gotten up from the floor to lunge at his friend. The fight between the two boys broke out, causing them to roll on the wet floor and collide with a couple of chairs while dealing blows to each other.

The fight was close, but most feared stepping in and getting hit as well so the two of them grappled for a long time. It wasn't until Tommy ran out of steam that the fight stopped. But Steve, even though he parried the blows, held the boy tightly through his shirt.

"Stay away from him!" Carol yelled again, trying to get closer to stop the man. But Steve seized this opportunity and took her arm firmly.

"Listen to me well you two," he said, breathing hard "My girlfriend is crying right now because of the stupid ideas that were put into her head so I'm only going to say it once: if you come near her or me again …”

"What will you do to us, Harrington?" Tommy laughed from his place. "Kill us?"

“No, but I remind you that my father is a very influential man and he is also your father's boss. Would you like your family to be left without money thanks to the dismissal of your father?” he asked. It was a meaningless threat and he knew it because his father would never do that for him. But apparently it was enough to scare Tommy away “What about you, Carol? Do you want your mother to know that you buy cocaine and that you fuck in every corner you find?”

"Okay, that's enough!" she sobbed, pushing Steve away from her boyfriend. The boy decided that it was the most reasonable thing to do and got up so that she could hold the young man's beaten body "Go away with that bitch, we don't need her or you"

"I hope not," Steve said, his voice angry "Because you're a total asshole for school and you're insane if you think I'll let you lay a finger on him again to steal some school work" he continued, seeing her because apparently, she still didn’t think that she had lost those benefits. Everyone was silent, fearful of having seen the boy so violent, so Steve simply walked without saying anything to his car, closing the door with force.

While blood was dripping from his eyebrow he drove his way home, just hoping that tomorrow he wouldn't realize that he had done a completely stupid thing.

The next day you woke up very sore, barely able to move to get out of bed. You had hardly slept at all and somehow managed to look decent and catch the bus, not really wanting to bother Steve to ask him to pick you up. He probably wouldn't even go to school because of a hangover or lack of sleep.

"Did you know that Steve hit Tommy?" a girl whispered when you first entered school, unaware of your presence. The bell rang and you had to go to your first class, but during this, the whispers, rumors, and gossip referring to the same thing did not stop being heard.

Had Steve had too many drinks and gotten aggressive? It was the only thing you needed. Still a little scared and confused you left at lunchtime, going straight to your locker to put your things away and then leaving to find Steve. But you didn't need to search long, because as soon as you closed the metal door you saw that he was there. He had a broken lip and the same skin on his eyebrow.

"My God, Steve, what happened to you?"

"Hello," he smiled, ignoring your worried face "What are you talking about?"

“Is it true that you fought with Tommy? The whole school is talking about it” you said and you couldn't help but sound annoyed. You wanted that kid to take a beating, but it didn't have to be Steve who was involved.

“Can we get out of here? I don't want to discuss it in the halls,” he begged you, feeling uncomfortable from everyone's stares. You didn't put up much of a fight and let him lead you to a secluded address, near the track where Steve used to run for training.

"And so?" you asked, now hearing you more concerned than annoyed. Steve was hesitating to tell you the truth, you could see it on his face.

"I'll explain, but promise not to get mad, okay?" he said, leaning down so he could look you in the eye. And even though you were sure that you couldn't keep that promise, you nodded. “Last night, after the party, I missed you so much and thought I'd go visit you” he started to say. From that point, it was off to a bad start “so I was planning to climb out the window and sleep for a bit, but then I found you…” he trailed off, searching for something to say. But you knew it was what he had seen, you had only done one thing that night.

"Did you hear my conversation with Nancy?"

"It wasn't my intention" he justified himself "But why didn't you ever tell me?"

"That doesn't matter Steve," you said, feeling the tears start to sting your eyes "What did you do?"

“I went to beat the crap out of that bastard, what else was he going to do? Carol is a bitch and I can't do too much but at least they get the message now."

"Which message?"

“That they don't have to mess with you,” he said, seriously. Suddenly the atmosphere was tense, and without knowing what to say. You didn't want him to go that far, but you also felt good that he (somehow) figured out what was going on “And I don't know what bullshit they told you, but none of that shit about I'll find someone better is true” he murmured, reaching out to cup your chin and force you to look at him. “You're my girlfriend and I love you. You know that, right? nothing would change that” he said with determination. He didn't wait for a response from you, he just pulled you a little with his hand and leaned in to kiss you. One kiss turned into another and then another until the seeming problem dwindled into insignificance. Steve knew how you felt and he had beaten you to the punch. And for you, that was the greatest proof of his love. 

TAG LIST: @sweetdayme4427 @smol-book-nerd

[glowingbadger]

Okay, so I had a thought for our dear fox boy, Kurama.... Imagine, "trying" to tease him by going down on him only to suddenly switch it up and go down on you instead, especially when you least expect it as revenge. You're on the phone with your best friend and suddenly he's there between your legs, but you can't say anything or let your friend know.

Oh-hoo, a most excellent concept, friend- and actually plays into a couple things I've written about Kurama before too, so I guess I should have seen this coming xD

Also this all just reminded me that I HAVE to do some sketches of the YYH boys in late 90's fashion. Ugh, what absolute icons.

Kurama (YYH) x AFAB Reader

NSFW 18+ v

Kurama's hair splays out across the pillow, making him look for all the world like a lounging ingenue in a romantic painting. Still, those emerald eyes level on you with a sharp cunning that tells you clearly where you stand. He wears a subdued smile that someone who didn't know him might find pleasant, charming- but you know what the grin of a fox spirit really means.

"Feeling rather bold today, aren't you?" he says, his tone light and conversational, even as your hands run down his chest and the toned contours of his abdomen from atop his clothing.

"Well, it doesn't seem fair for you to call the shots all the time," you reply from your position straddling his hips. You like to think you sound the part of the confident seductress, but your heart leaps every time you meet Kurama's calculated gaze. You may be in the "dominant" position, but you know you haven't nearly tamed him. For now, you'll just have to try to push him a bit further.

You kiss a slow and deliberate path down the center of his torso, undoing the buttons of his shirt one-by-one, and revelling in the feeling of firm muscle shifting and flexing at your touch. Kurama lets out an openly pleasured sigh, and doesn't shy away in the slightest as your hands reach the front of his jeans. With a playful little hum, you run your hand up along the bulge of his stiffening cock beneath layers of fabric. Very subtly, his hips shift up towards your touch, and you bite at your lip as your eyes flicker up to his yet unreadable expression.

"You must be much more sensitive than you let on, Kurama," you tease, tracing his length with a single finger, "You're already this hard, after all."

Just as you'd started to feel sure of having the upper hand, he props himself up on an elbow to observe you between his thighs. One hand reaches down to caress your cheek, ending at your chin, where his thumb runs the curve of your lower lip.

"Of course I am," he replies bluntly, "It's only natural when I desire you so ardently. Besides," he goes on, his grin curling into a smirk, "If your aim is retribution for all that I've done to you, then I imagine I have quite a thrilling evening to look forward to."

So much for flustering him, or even just getting him to act a little bit shy. Your cheeks burn hot, and you mumble,

"Should have tied you up. And gagged you, while we're at it."

"Hm. Perhaps you should have," Kurama replies casually.

This bastard. Is it really this impossible to gain the slightest bit of ground on him?

Impatient for results, you undo the front of his jeans, and tug them down with his boxers, freeing his impressive member from its confines. Kurama continues to watch you comfortably as you take the base of his cock in hand and slowly drag your tongue up the underside of his shaft. You can feel it twitching and swelling in your hand, hardening to its full size before too long. Frankly, you've half a mind to climb onto his lap and ride him then and there. He does so love to tease you- the chance to have him now without the usual exercise of restraint is undeniably tempting. For the time being, you satisfy yourself with gently licking and kissing his twitching manhood, letting the warmth of your breath and fleeting touches gently stimulate him.

He is clearly enjoying himself; aside from the soft murmurs of pleasure he grants you as your tongue circles the crown of his cock, his direct gaze hasn't wavered for even a moment. Still propped up above you, he absently strokes your hair in one hand as half-lidded eyes watch your attempts to provoke him.

"You mean to tease me, I see..." he says softly, his tone only hinting at his amusement. Even better concealed is the heady arousal building at his core- his desire to break this arrogant facade you've put on, to see you crumble back into obedience at his hands.

And as if by divine providence, his opportunity arrives.

The phone at the bedside table rings, and you pause to glance up at Kurama. Only the glint in his eye hints at his plan at first- but then, as you watch in disbelief, he picks up the phone before it's finished its third ring. He sits upright as he greets your friend on the line, and your body feels hot and cold all at once.

"Hm? Oh, yes- right here, in fact. One moment."

Kurama meets your eyes with a smirk and offers the phone to you with his hand cupped over the receiver. Your face is burning red, and you grumble near inaudibly,

"No fair!"

He gives a short laugh, tucking away his still-hard cock and then fixing his clothing with his free hand as he says,

"I apologize if I have ever given you the impression that I am 'fair' by nature." All at once, he catches you around the waist and pulls you down onto your back on the bed. You resist crying out in surprise, if only because when you look up at him and see the smouldering heat in his eyes, your breath catches in your chest. Then, without a word, he hands the phone to you. Biting nervously at your lower lip, you take it from him, clear your throat, and say,

"He-hey! How's it going?"

Your friend immediately launches into an excited ramble about the finale of a show she's been following obsessively for the last year and a half. Honestly, you should have expected this call- stupid of you to think you'd have the evening free with the finale airing. As she goes on about how "so many of her predictions were dead-on," Kuramas hands run indulgently down the contours of your body. Your heart races, and you can't help tensing, arching up against him just a little. Then, he's working your pants down off your hips, and you give him a pleading look that he meets like a stone wall.

"-- I mean, can you believe it?! It's like, exactly what I said would happen!!"

"Yeah, that's, uh," you struggle to keep up, but your eyes are fixed on Kurama lowering himself between your bared legs, "that's pretty wild..."

With a placade grin on his face, he kisses a trail down the inside curve of your thigh, his touches delicate and yet unreserved. Your eyelids flutter half-shut, but you force yourself to- more or less -follow the thread of your friend's rant. That is, until you feel the sting of Kurama's teeth at the soft flesh far up the inner curve of your thigh. He sucks a dark love-bite to your skin- one that you know will remind you of his presence there for days to come. Still, you manage to camouflage your gasp of shock and pleasure into a sudden cough.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, totally! Sorry, don't mind me- go on!" you babble out your reply in a hurry, knowing you won't be able to trust your voice when Kurama continues this torment. He chuckles silently behind his hand, and you pout uselessly at him. Rather than acknowledge this, he refocuses on his task as the phone rant continues. You do your best to keep a consistent stream of "Oh, yeah?" and "Wow, crazy!", all while elegant fingers spread your lower lips and warm breath teases your over-sensitive body. Then, without warning, his tongue glides firm across your aching clit. Your thighs twitch in around his head and you arch up from the bed.

"Woa--! That's... incredible!" you translate the gasp you desperately want to let out into a perhaps overly-enthusiastic reply. Fortunately, your friend is too caught up in her finale recap to police her own excitement, let alone yours. Still wearing that cocky smirk, Kurama pushes his hair back behind his ears, then returns to tease your clit with the tip of his tongue.

He doesn't let up after this, and frankly, your impulses are torn. Part of you wants to be as subtle as possible, to silently endure the slow, luxurious movements of his lips and tongue pulsing against your cunt and stiffened clit. Another part of you- the part you're fighting to subdue -wants to grab onto that silky red hair and grind against him, to rush yourself to your climax and to spare yourself further torture. But you and Kurama both know you won't be able to keep quiet if you do. So you fuss anxiously with the phone's tangled cord, shifting and squirming on the bed beneath him and biting back pleasured gasps and whimpers.

Your legs are trembling around him and you're positively soaked with your arousal and his saliva. Leaning back on the pillow, you scrunch your eyes closed and take a deep breath.

"Oh- you remember that one voice actor I told you about?"

"Yeah, uh," you struggle to pull your thoughts together, but Kurama nudges the flat of his tongue rhythmically against your clit, and your body is begging for release, "This show... was his first big on-screen thing, right?" you manage to choke out. As though pleased by your performance, your lover gives a soft hum that sends his breath fluttering over your vulnerable skin, then presses more firmly into you. His skillful tongue teases your entrance for a moment, rubbing into you while your muscles tighten, instinctively longing for friction, for something inside, for something to cling to. You're panting silently, biting at your finger to keep quiet while your friend tells you all about her latest celebrity crush.

So close. You're so dangerously close to the rush of your climax. But you hold on, every inch of your body aching with need and restraint. Kurama can obviously sense the desperate state you're in, and you know that he's savoring it. And yet, when you glance down to watch the erotic movements of his mouth, the way his eyes devour you, the way his hands grip at your hips- you realize that you don't have it in you to care about your pride anymore.

"Anyway, they're airing an interview with the cast soon, so I gotta go so I don't miss it."

The words are a beacon of hope, and while your friend apologizes for cutting out so suddenly, you assure her again and again that you don't mind.

"Really, you should... go- uh, go enjoy the thing!"

Kurama's lips seal around your clit and the dearly sensitive surrounding flesh. His tongue flicks across the hard little bundle over and over, his hands firm at your hips, holding you strictly in place. He's not holding back anymore. Your eyes roll back and your body burns, but you keep yourself silent. Just a little longer. Don't let him make you cum- not yet. He feels too good- and you know he wouldn't care if you screamed his name for your friend or anyone else to hear.

"Oh, also, we should totally grab coffee or something soon!"

"Yeah- that sounds really good-!" your back arcs up from the sheets.

"Cool! I'll call again soon, byeeee!"

You hear the click of the receiver on the other end. Your arms go limp, dropping the phone to the floor. Kurama leans over you, pushing himself against you while his tongue works your clit and you gasp aloud for him.

"Kurama! Ohhh... Oh, God- I'm-!"

A tingling, sparkling wave of pleasure explodes from your core and rushes across the surface of your skin. You can't remember the last time you came this hard, and you imagine Kurama can feel what he's doing to you. Your taste coats his tongue, one shaky hand weaves your fingers through his hair as your hips buck towards him. With one last desperate cry of his name, you relax back onto the bed, your boneless limbs making you feel like a puddle of mindless bliss.

Panting, practically gasping for breath, your unfocused eyes gaze up at the ceiling as the last tremors of your climax pass through you.

"Haa... Mm, Kurama..." you whimper out as he places one last kiss to your now soaked folds.

He crawls up atop you, and a gentle hand turns your face to him. His smile is warm and openly affectionate, and he caresses your cheek like a groom at the altar. Looking at him now, it's hard to imagine he's the same man who just put you through that unique form of torture. You're still catching your breath, and when he kisses you with all the tenderness in the world, you can hardly even reciprocate.

"Well done, my love," he says at last, "Do you think you can continue to behave for me tonight?"

Some distant part of your mind realizes that you've been manipulated- that he's utterly dismantled your attempt at dominance. You should be frustrated. You should try to regain the upper hand and show him that he doesn't always gets to be in control. Instead, your half-lidded eyes meet him and you murmur,

"Yes... I'll be good..."

[inkandpen22]

The Princess and The Pogue (pt. 6)

Pairing: JJ x Female!Reader  / Topper x Female!Reader  

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: Swearing, mild smut, fluff, angst, mentions of abuse (wow a lot) 

Part Summary: The aftermath of the bonfire is pushing you to your limit. Meanwhile, JJ is slowly losing himself in his grief. 

Masterlist

You and Topper meet your friends at the Ocean Club for lunch as arranged over text after the chaos at the Boneyard. You, Rafe, Rhett, Kelce, and Topper are all gathered around the table on the patio of the club. Despite looking put-together, you're all discombobulated in the head. All of your Kook friends are startled, to say the least by the events. More than half of them have never been close to a gun and all of them share a hatred of Pogues. 

Your brother Rhett invited his "friend" Crystal.  She's been fawning after him since their freshman year. They hooked up one time and she was practically picking out an engagement ring. She hangs around Rhett, Rafe, and all of their friends, hoping one of them would show a slight bit of interest. Her bottle black hair and bottle tan scream more New Jersey than OBX, but she throws on a Lily Politzer dress calls herself a Kook. She's always been low-key intimidated by you and envious even. She wants your title of the Princess of the OBX, but she struggles to get past being an associate. In summary, Crystal thinks acting like a stuck-up brat is how to be a Kook. She's delusional.

"Last night was unreal,” Kelce exhales deeply as he leans back in his chair. 

“You know how Pogues can be,” Topper remarks bitterly, placing his arm across your shoulders. 

"Where were you last night?" Rafe questions your brother from down the table. 

"My dad had me in Charleston on business," Rhett explains with a roll of his eyes. 

Crystal places her hand on Rhett's arm, giving it a supportive squeeze. The sight nearly makes you gag. Never in a million years will you call her your sister-in-law. 

"Lucky you," Kelce chuckles. 

"Yeah you really dodged a bullet," Rafe makes a pun. 

"Nice Rafe," Topper nods his head slowly, giving his friend a disapproving look. 

You toss around bits of lettuce around your salad, not exactly hungry. You wouldn't be here right now if Topper didn't already say you two were coming. It's not that you dislike your friends. You just don't feel like a review of last night and a Pogue roast session. Topper notices your lack of voice and interest in the group. He rubs his thumb over your shoulder, gaining your attention. You offer him a weak smile, your mind elsewhere. 

“At least Maybank has what’s coming to him. Apparently, the police are looking for him," Crystal announces to the table. 

Your fork slips from your hand accidentally, causing everyone to stare at you. “Wait, what?!" You glance between the girl and Topper to see if it's true. Topper doesn't react despite seeing your worried expression. Did Topper already know this? Did he not tell you? 

Rafe frowns at your reaction and his flicker to Topper before he answers. “Yeah, people told their parents what happened and the parents reported the incident to the police," he explains hesitantly. 

"As they should!” Crystal adds with a scoff of disgust, wearing a smug expression. “Who knows what that good-for-nothing white trash would’ve done to us if given the chance!" She justifies from across the table. 

“Oh my God, shut the fuck up, Crystal!” You snap. 

Everyone's jaws drop, astounded that such a vile sentence could come from your lips. 

“Ugh! Excuse me?!” Crystal gasps. 

You lean forward in your chair, turning your body to face the entitled girl. 

“What? Are you deaf all of a sudden?" You wear a mocking grin. "Wouldn’t be surprised with your big loud fucking mouth going constantly!” 

“What’s up your ass Whitfield?!” She fires back, drawing the attention of some other patrons. 

“Your piece of shit attitude!” You bark. 

"Ohh," Kelce drags out. 

"Wow," Rafe struggles to hide his amusement. 

Topper places a warning hand on your shoulder which you shake off. 

“Why are you defending him? He pulled a gun on Topper! On you!” Crystal reminds you in a shout. 

“I know that, Genius! Considering I was on the other side of said gun!” You hiss between your teeth. 

“Then what possible justification is there for what he did?" She huffs. "JJ Maybank is insane! A trash Pogue!” 

You slap your palms against the table, making everything raddle. “No, he’s not!” 

"Y/N!" Your brother warns. "Remember where you are!" 

You don't give a shit about where you are! If this girl continues to run her mouth, you're going to do a lot worse than yell. 

“What? What is it about him, huh?" Crystal presses with a wicked smirk. "A charity thing? Wealthy guilt? Rooting for the underdog?” 

“Crystal!” Rafe barks her name defensively. 

“What?” The girl giggles. "It's true, isn't it? She's got a thing for the bottom feeder!" 

“Back off!” Topper warns her, finally backing you up. He may agree with her, but once she starts making digs at you he doesn't hesitate to put her in her place. 

Then, a lightbulb snaps on in her head. “Oh wait... or is it that you have the hots for him? Have you officially run out of guys on this side of the island? You a Pogue whore now?” She laughs mockingly. 

Having enough of her, you impulsively pick up your full glass of white wine and toss it in her face. She gasps as the liquid covers her, her mouth in the shape of an "O." The boys' jaws hit the table as all they can do is watch you toss your drink at her white tube top. 

"Y/N!" Topper utters your name in shock. This is nothing like you. You never lose your cool. You're always the calm and put together one of your friends. 

"You bitch!" Crystal nearly cries. "This is designer!" 

You groan, tossing your head back. "Oh my God! Get over yourself!" 

“JJ Maybank should be sent to jail with his dad and if he rotted in there I doubt anyone would miss him!” Crystal remarks with a snarky smirk. 

That's it! Without a second thought, you fly up from your chair, causing it to toss backward onto the floor. You leap across the full table, reaching your arms out for the girl. Kelce and Rafe move out the way as Crystal screams. Glasses and silverware fall off the table onto the wood-paneled floor patio floor. Topper moves quickly to wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you back, but not before you get a good slap across her face. 

“Woah, Woah, Woah there!” He pants, struggling to get a good hold on you. 

“Let me go!” You scream, wiggling in his arms. 

“Nope, not letting you get arrested today,” he grunts, stepping backward away from the table. 

“You crazy whore!” Crystal yells, holding her cheek. 

 “You’re calling me a whore? That’s ironic considering your name is Crystal! You were practically named for the corner, bitch!” You fire back, tossing up your middle fingers at her while Topper drags you toward the exit. 

“Damn!” Kelce laughs, covering his mouth to hide it. 

You don't care who's watching. Crystal had this coming a long time ago and she's pushed your patience to its limit the moment she touched JJ. She'll know now to never speak of him. 

“Fuck you, Y/N!” Crystal screams one last time. 

Rhett grabs her arm, quietly begging for her to stop. He's certainly pissed at your impolite actions and will likely run to tell your parents. 

“No thanks! I’m not into insecure, loudmouth, prostitutes!” You snap out one final dig before Topper gets you out the door. 

You never noticed Pope cleaning a table just yards away, you were pretty preoccupied. He watched in awe as you quite literally flew across the table and slapped a girl because she spoke wrongly about JJ. After Pope saw you with Topper, he wasn't sure what to think. He was just as confused by your relationship as JJ. The turn of events he's just witnessed sealed the deal in his mind, you're in love with JJ, whether you know it or not. 

________________________________

After his shift at the Club, Pope immediately went to John B's, knowing that's where his friends would be waiting to go out on the HMS Pogue. 

“You guys! You’ll never believe what happened at work today!” He rushes out as he jogs down the dock. 

“All the Kooks got swallowed up by the ocean?” JJ remarks bitterly in a grumble as he lounges on the front of the boat in his swim trunks

“No!” He pants as he slows to a stop. “Y/N and Crystal got into this huge fight!” 

“What?!” John B gasps. 

“What do you mean? Is she okay?!” Kiara questions as she helps Pope onto the boat. 

“Yeah, yeah, she’s fine, but it was insane!" Pope laughs in amazement. 

“What about?” Sarah inquires, eager to learn more. 

“JJ!" Pope explains with the utmost enthusiasm. "Crystal was talking shit and the next thing I know Y/N throws her drink in her face and jumps at her. She slaps the hell out of her! Topper literally had to carry her out!” 

“Holy shit,” John B mutters, wide-eyed. 

“God I would’ve paid big bucks to see that,” Kiara chuckles. 

“I can’t even envision Y/N doing something like that,” Sarah shakes her head in disbelief. 

“I know, she’s usually so polite, calm, civilized," Kiara lists. 

“You should’ve seen her guys. It was so badass. Lesson learned, don’t piss of Y/N!" Pope settles down on the bench beside Kiara. 

“It was over me?” JJ finally voices quietly. 

Pope hums. “Crystal wouldn’t stop and Y/N told her to “shut the fuck up.” 

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard Y/N swear,” Sarah admits. 

 “That’s because she rarely does,” John B adds. 

“So she’s not pissed at me?” JJ questions, his tone steady and expressionless. 

“Based on how she was going to claw a girl’s eyes out in your defense, I vote no,” Pope determines. 

JJ stands up in a rush, moving to hop down into the boat. “Well, where did she go after that? Did Topper take her home or did she-" 

“She went looking for you,” you call out from the opposite end of the dock. 

Everyone's heads snap in your direction. All of their eyes are wide with surprise. They all smile, honestly glad to see you. JJ, however, just stares blankly with an unreadable reaction. 

“Hi JJ,” you greet timidly, doing your best to smile but you fall short. 

The boy never breaks his eye contact with you as he jumps off the boat. He marches toward you and you're not sure what to expect. You haven't spoken since last night and you wouldn't exactly call that a conversation. "What do you want? Come to gloat?" He sasses. 

“Okay, that’s our cue!” John B announces, starting up the engine. 

“Yep! We'll catch you guys later!” Pope rushes out. 

“Good to see you Y/N!” Sarah adds.

The Pogues desert JJ, leaving you two to work out your problems. JJ doesn't even turn around or react in the slightest as John B hurries the boat away. An ounce of you wonders if it's because he wants to stay, to talk to you. 

Your eyes flicker down to his chest and torso. The bruises you saw last night as a tad more healed, but still, look awful. Now that his body is more exposed, you start to notice more marks and cuts all over his arms, chest, ribcage. The sight makes your heart sink. Without thought, you place your hand on JJ's stomach. "Did Top do this?" You worry. JJ's muscles clench under your touch. The feeling of your fingertips glide across his bare torso makes him go weak in the knees. 

"No, got into a fight with a bobcat. You should see the bobcat," he smirks slightly, making light of the situation. 

Your face falls as your eyes meet his. "Don't joke-" 

"Sorry!" He steps back. "Can't take you seriously when everything you say is a lie," he scoffs. 

Your brows scrunch together in confusion. "What are you even saying right now?!" 

"It was all bullshit!" He snaps. "All of it! Everything you said! You're no different than the rest of them!" He exhales deeply, taking a moment to stare at you. He immediately regrets yelling considering how guilty he felt after what he did last night. Yet, JJ's hurt and he's pent up these emotions for days now. They're driving him nuts. "You lie, cheat, you take what you want when you want it no matter the consequences or who you hurt!" 

"I never lied to you, JJ!" You defend, equally as passionate as him. "Every fucking word was true!" JJ's brows rise slightly at your use of language. It appearing so foreign coming from your mouth. You sigh, "Jesus, JJ you can be so oblivious sometimes!" You turn on your heels, marching back down the dock toward the yard. 

"At least I'm not playing both sides of the fence! I know what I want and where I belong!" JJ fires. 

You whip your head over your shoulder and stomp back toward him. "You freaking psycho!" 

"Psycho! How am I a psycho?" JJ laughs, astonished. 

"You pulled a gun!" You remind him. 

"He was drowning me, Y/N!" JJ screams, getting in your face. You swallow hard. Despite the intensity of your arguing, you can't help but feel a rush of satisfaction having JJ so close again. JJ looks to the side, taking a moment to collect his thoughts. "I'm not gonna be your little plaything while you wait on Topper of all people to fuck you again," he shakes his head, meeting your gaze again. "I won't do it." 

Your lips part, not believing the words coming from him right now. "Fuck you, JJ," you hiss between your teeth before turning again to walk away. JJ stays where he is and watches you stomp away. A part of him wants to beg you to stay, the other tells himself that you deserve everything he's saying. 

You come to a slow stop as your mind races. You're Y/N Whitfield, you don't have to take this shit, especially from JJ Maybank of all people. You spin on your heels and JJ glances up as you do. "For someone so smart you're an idiot!" You clench your jaw. "Topper is my best friend, that's it!" You reason. "Whatever Sarah told you, that was before I met you! He could never be you!" 

JJ simply stares at you blankly. The silence kills you. One minute he won't shut up and the next he stands there like an idiot. 

"The way I feel when I'm with Topper..." you sigh, unsure how to describe it. You're not entirely what to call it. "It's comfortable, sure, but it's not anything glorious. There's no excitement there, just a sense of security from knowing each other for so long." You hesitate to continue, but since you'll probably never speak again, you might as well lay everything out on the table right? "You don't even have to touch me, your glance is enough to make me feel alive. When I went to bed, I thought of you. When I woke up, I thought of you. You're... you're it for me, JJ. I can't imagine there's anything better than when I'm with you. But... I guess we already fucked it up didn't we?" 

There's a pause between shots and you prepare to walk away from JJ forever. Then, something in him sets off and he starts rushing up to you. Startled, you begin to shuffle back. 

"What are you doing?" You question, placing a hesitant hand up. 

"Showing you how much of an idiot I really am," he replies swiftly as he brings his hands up to cup your face. 

He pauses for a second, looking at you with hooded eyes. You lose all capability of breathing, melting into his hands. You glance down at his parted lips, waiting for what's next. JJ smashing his lips to yours hungrily. Without hesitation, you reciprocate the action, combing your fingers through the hair on the back of his neck.

 You meant every word. Being with Topper can be great and there's so much history there. Yet, being with JJ is entirely different. It's new. It's organic. It's what keeps you awake at night in the best way. You imagine exploring every inch of his body and never letting go. 

JJ breaks from you, pressing his lips to your forehead as his eyes fall shut. "I'm so sorry, Baby, for everything!" He whispers against your cheek before planting a kiss there. 

"Me too," you reply. 

He pulls back, meeting your gaze. "I don't think you're a slut." 

You laugh, "I sure hope not!"  

"You're too good for me," he shakes his head as he still wonders if this is all in his imagination. 

"Quite the opposite actually," you debate. 

"No, don't say that." He shakes his head frantically, hating it when you speak badly about yourself. "You're everything to me!" 

You place your hands over his on your cheek and plant a kiss on his palm, making JJ totally simp for you. 

"Do you... would you maybe wanna have a little hot tub night?" The boy asks nervously, still kinda unsure of himself when it comes to you. 

"I'd love that," you smile, wanting to spend every moment with him from this day forever. 

_____________________________

Settling in the hot tub, JJ tugs at the rim of your panties, pulling you to sit across his lap. You drape your arms on his shoulders, resting your forehead against his. 

"Are you warm enough?" He whispers, placing a gentle kiss on your cheek. 

Hum as your eyes falls shut, pondering the closeness. 

"You're so soft and warm. You're like a human Pillow Pet," he comments with a slight snicker. 

"Excuse me?" You lift your head to look at him. 

"Minus the furry part," he elaborates. 

"You're such a goof." You laugh, placing your palm against his head and pushing it away playfully. 

"Only for you, Baby," JJ grins. 

You place a quick peck on his lips before shifting to move off of his lap. 

JJ pouts, letting out a minor whine. "Uh uh, don't leave." 

"I'm just grabbing my drink," you giggle at his childlike expression. As you take a sip from your beer, you can feel JJ watching you. You glance over your shoulder and sure enough, his eyes remain locked on your ass. "You're starring," you smirk. 

"You bet your amazing ass I am," he mumbles, reaching across the water and grabbing your ass, giving it a squeeze. 

"JJ!" You gasp, swatting his hand away. 

He tilts his head back, exposing his sharp jaw as he wraps his arms around your waist, bringing you back to him. "Couldn't help myself! It was practically begging for a squeeze." 

"Right..." You nod, straddling his lap. 

As an act of retaliation, you press your palm to the center of his boxers, making the boy jolt lightly from surprise. 

"Holy shit," he swallows hard. 

"Couldn't help myself, it was practically begging for it," you smirk, repeating his words. 

"You're too good to be true," he whispers, bringing his lips closer to yours. 

"Dido," you grin, leaning in to kiss him. 

_____________________

After pondering the bliss of you and JJ finally being reunited in the hot tub, you two make dinner together in the Chateau's kitchen. You two move in sync as you prepare the oh-so-difficult meal of pizza rolls. You share a place of them while cuddling watching Goonies. During it, JJ comes up with the idea that you two should be Andy and Brand for Halloween. It makes you smile and all warm inside to hear him making plans for two months from now. It makes you fully realize how much JJ sees a future with you. Somewhere before Goonies was over, you fell asleep in JJ's lap while he was playing with your hair. The last few days have worn on you emotionally, mentally, and physically. 

The Pogues came home and when they saw you and JJ on the couch, especially you, they quietly stayed outside. Except, John B lingered, smiling at the sight of his friend doting on you. He's never seen JJ be so gentle and patient in his life. 

“You’re different with her," John B whispers not to wake you. 

JJ glances up from observing you look at his friend with a satisfied smirk. “She makes me want to be better." His fingers comb through your Y/H/C locks, utterly content. 

“I think she’s really good for you,” John B nods in agreement.  

“She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I want to change, to be worthy of being with her," JJ confesses quietly as he returns his focus to you. 

"You two deserve each other," John B assures his friend. 

"You think?" JJ wonders, still unsure of his place in your life. 

John B snickers lightly. "I mean, she did leap across a table in front of all her friends and slap a girl to defend you." 

"Yeah she did, didn't she? Pretty badass," JJ chuckles, still amazed that you did that. 

"She loves you man," John B concludes with a shrug. 

"Really?" JJ narrows his eyes with curiosity at his friend. 

"Well, it's obvious isn't it?" John B laughs breathlessly with a crooked grin. 

"I thought it was all in my head," JJ confesses with a childish fall of his lips like he just learned some overwhelming news. 

"It's not," his friend shakes his head, happy to see his friend finally have some hope. "She looks at you the same way you look at her." 

JJ's brows scrunch together and he looks up at John B. "When you and Sarah said it to each other, how did you know it was the right time?" 

"You'll know. You'll feel it," he describes confidently.  

"What if I feel it now?" JJ asks softly, glancing down at you. 

"Then say it. Say it whenever you can, as often as you can," John B advises before stepping away quietly to give you two time. 

JJ sits with your head cradled in his lap. He's not eager to join his friends around the fire outside. He's content with you here with him, whether you're asleep or not. You're enough for him. You're everything to him. 

JJ leans down, planting a kiss to your temple, then gliding his lips down to your ear. "I love you, Y/N," he whispers while you sleep.  __________________________________________________

Masterlist

Tags: @starkeythinker @bethii1 @thegunnerkelly@cc13723things@hockeybabe87 @jolomez 

[yuta-nakamots]

perfect - z.cl

Pairing - Chenle x Fem!Reader

Genre - fluff, angst, university!au, friends to lovers!au

Warnings -  alcohol consumption, mention of drunkeness, lots of arguments, heavy making out, breakups, contains an aged up chenle (26-ish) towards the end

Summary - He’s definitely not your knight in shining armor, he may not be the one you bring home to mother, but he’ll be the one to give you flowers. Chenle is not the right one for you, but he is for right now.

Word Count - 5.2k

A/N - Bolded phrases are song lyrics taken from One Direction’s song ‘Perfect’ and inspired from the lyrics along with all the vlives where Chenle and the members have started yelling out the lyrics.This was supposed to come out back in January but school held it up and now Ana is gone hhhhh. I know she’s still on Tumblr but under a new url so if anyone wants to send this to her, to let her know that I did finish it, that would be nice. 

Taglist - @astroboy-lele​​​ @in-my-neofeelings​​​ || fill out this form if you’d like to join my general taglist ^^

Written for the Sometimes Letting Go… Collab originally hosted by @sunryu​ who unfortunately deactivated. 

When I first saw you from across the room, I could tell you were curious

The mutual attraction between you and Chenle was undeniable. Ever since the two of you first met as freshmen in an econ class, you knew he was your twin flame and he was yours. That initial meeting was almost comical, the way the professor said to pair up and talk to someone next to them for a bit and it seemed like everyone had turned away from you except for the boy sitting next to you.

It seems you both had the same realization as your heads turned and eyes met. “Well I guess you’re my friend for today,” he began, “hi, my name is Chenle. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

“Y/n,” you told him, “the pleasure is all mine.”

“So, why are you in this class?” He asked, tapping his pen on his leather-bound planner.

You hesitated for a second as you thought about how much to tell him. “I’m majoring in business and this was just one of the mandatory classes in my plan.”

“Hm, same here,” Chenle shared, seeming the slightest bit amused at your similarity, “would you also happen to be in calculus this semester?”

“Section 3 at 10:30?” You counter.

Chenle broke into a smile, “that’s the one.”

“How about freshman seminar?” You asked.

“1:15 in the world language building?” Chenle offered, copying your answer from before.

“Wow,” your eyebrows were raised in actual disbelief, “did you steal my schedule or something?”

“No, but I do believe in fate,” the boy next to you confessed, “would you like to get lunch sometime before freshmen seminar?”

You nodded, “I’d like that,” you stopped mid-sentence when you remembered that you told your friends you’d eat with them, “I am gonna be eating with my friends though so I could introduce you to them if you’d like.”

“Want to bet that we have the same friends too?”

“No way, that would be too coincidental.”

And coincidental it was. Somehow your friends knew some of Chenle’s friends whether it be from high school activities, childhood friends, or even having just met in their own classes. Your small group of five had immediately doubled in size.

Of course, with such a large group of friends, there was much fun to be had and many memories to be made. During midterms is when you were thankful you were majoring in business and not something like biology or chemistry. You could still go out and have fun on weekends with Chenle and the majority of your friends, meanwhile a few poor souls had to stay back to study their ‘reaction mechanisms’ or whatever the heck those things were called.

You quickly found that you weren’t one for parties though you loved to hang out with your friends and have small little parties of your own in the dorms. Every single time, as you all got progressively drunker and started to clock out for the night, it was always you and Chenle left being the two most sober with no other choice but to take care of your friends over hushed conversations.

“How much vodka did Hannah even drink?” Chenle asked while you both worked on cleaning up the mess of solo cups and napkins surrounding your friend who had, unfortunately, drank over half of the bottle. You picked it up, waving it at Chenle to show him. “She’s gonna have a nasty hangover…or at least wake up super dehydrated.”

As you worked on laying a blanket across her, passed out on the floor, Chenle had managed to stuff all the napkins inside the cups he had collected and was busy aiming at the trash can across the room. Right as he was about to shoot, “miss!” you called out. The little stack of cups hit the rim of the plastic trash bin and fell to the floor. Chenle turned to you, sticking out his tongue and imitating the way you caused him to mess up before going to properly dispose of the rubbish.

Instead of simply placing it in the waste, he once again returned to where he stood before, with one eye shut, aiming for the bin. You let out a scoff, ready to disturb him once more. He shot you a glance, knowing what you were planning from the way you just stood watching him. But regardless, he tried again. “Airball” you sang as he released the short stack of cups, sending them flying to the foot of the bin.

Chenle let out a growl, childishly stomping his way over to you while you tried to quietly escape from his grasps through the mess of food and other miscellaneous items on the floor. From the hushed giggles and name-calling from the two of you as you both stumbled around the room, to the whispered late-night thoughts and affirmations spoken from your positions on the floor with your heads resting on the edge of a bed, you barely even noticed how fast time was passing.

“Are you going home for the holidays?” You asked him.

He shook his head, “it’s my first time getting to live away from my parents and whenever I do go back, they’ll probably be expecting me to bring some girl with me.”

You turned to look at him, “why would they expect that?”

“They’re both getting old and want to retire soon,” Chenle started, “so the faster I get married and take over the company, the faster they’ll get to live out the rest of their lives,” he explained.

“Well that’s not very nice of them,” you commented, “what kind of parents would place such high responsibility on their child like that?”

“Mine I guess,” Chenle sighed.

After a moment of silence, you sat up, unsure what to make of the next words to come out of your mouth. “If you want, I could go with you.” Chenle looked at you with his eyebrows furrowed. “Like, I could be your fake girlfriend or something so that they don’t bother you so much about finding one.”

“That’s…an idea,” he started, biting on the corner of his lip as he played out possible scenarios in his head. “I think that would only make it worse though since we’d both have to make up stories and tell the same information.”

“True. But we could at least make it look believable, don’t you think?” You reached over to pet Chenle’s head the same way you’ve seen him do to his friends. “Oh, Chenle, you’re so cute,” you cooed, “I can’t wait to marry you and be with you for the rest of our lives.”

He grabbed your wrist and put it in your lap, not very keen on the show of affection. “Yeah, I think we’d look like a pretty convincing couple.”

“Do we look good together though?” You pondered. “If we were to show up to an event or something, would we make people stop and stare at us?”

“Anyone can do that if they wear something weird or do something out of the ordinary-“

“Okay but that’s not what I’m asking,” you interrupted, “I’m asking, would we look good together as a couple?”

Chenle shrugged apprehensively, “sure.” Your eyes bore into him as if forcing a more legit answer out of him. “Yes, I think we would look good as a couple.”

It was as if you and Chenle were made for each other. Whatever one did, the other was never too far behind. It was absolutely no surprise to your friends when you told them Chenle had asked you out and you became official. While your college careers continued and friends came and went, Chenle was always with you. He was your solid island in the middle of a tumultuous sea, your oasis in a dried desert. You didn’t need anyone else around to have fun, just him, just the two of you.

But if you like causing trouble up in hotel rooms and if you like having secret little rendezvous

Being with Chenle was as wild as things could get. It meant impulsive plans and bad decisions. Weekend nights normally consisted of one of you driving with no destination in mind until someone got hungry. Even at that point, the night didn’t end.

Sometimes the two of you would stay out past midnight, not wanting to leave each other’s company just yet. The feeling of the wind whipping past you as Chenle drove or the thrill of gassing it down the freeway was almost dreamlike. One would think that at this point, you’d return home, but for you, your home was wherever Chenle was. If it meant staying in a small hotel room for the night drinking cheap wine out of paper cups then so be it, that was home.

“Baby, you already drank almost half of the bottle, leave some for me,” Chenle teased, his eyes glimmering under the low lighting. The brightness of the small lamp on the desk failed to reach where he was sitting, the cozy armchair too far in the corner for it to be illuminated.

“Come here and get some then,” you suggested, lazily winking at him before downing another shot-sized gulp and enjoying the burn from the liquid running down your throat. The bed you were sitting on wasn’t all that soft but you had already warmed up a little spot of it and gotten too comfortable to move.

Chenle raised an eyebrow at you, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I don’t think you want me to do that.”

“Why not?” Your expression mirroring his.

“You wanna find out?

“Maybe I do.”

He let out a scoff and within a second he was on the bed, climbing up and settling over you. His warm breath fanned your neck, the scent of alcohol filling your senses. “Are you sure about that?”

“Fuck around and find out, handsome,” you taunted.

You had barely even finished your sentence before Chenle’s lips were on yours, his usual soft and pillowy lips became hot and heavy against yours under the guide of the fifteen-dollar wine. You were sure that you were definitely getting tipsy but Chenle’s love and passion were even more overwhelming. It was moments like this when you felt that you were drunk off of his love and it was absolutely intoxicating in the best way.

If you like to do the things you know that we shouldn’t do, then baby I’m perfect

It was drunk weekends like this that led to a rocky start of the following week. It’s not that you and Chenle were bad students, it’s just that when you become totally infatuated with the person you love, you start to devote yourself to them instead of what actually needs to get done.

As sophomores in college, one would think that you’d have a little more self-control but with Chenle, you just couldn’t help it. He was worse than any drug you could ever take, to the point where your friends would have to intervene and keep you in your rooms until a substantial amount of work was done.

You called them annoying but really you should’ve been thankful to them for caring so much about you back then, and you are thankful, looking back on it. They always told you ‘distance makes the heart grow fonder’ and you wish you had listened to them. Maybe if you did, you wouldn’t have lost a relationship that you thought was practically flawless.

Perfect for you

In junior year, that is when your beautiful illusion finally began crumbling down. Your workloads grew heavier and your hours of sleep decreased. Chenle would often leave you on read, having opened your message in the middle of studying then forgotten to reply to it. Even when you childishly got upset at him for that, he’d always give you the same apology or buy you something cute as if money could shut you up.

With little to no distance between the two of you, it was easy for boundaries to be crossed and for problems to go unaddressed. You can feel like you know someone so well, that they’ll always understand what you mean and they can read your words like a book, but it didn’t seem that way anymore with Chenle.

He’d make fun of the way you always made him say ‘I love you’ at least once a day or some of your other pet peeves, including the way you had a Hello Kitty mouse pad that was ‘too childish for a college student to be using.’ It may have been out of love but it sure didn’t seem that way.

I might never be the hands you put your heart in or the arms that hold you any time you want them

Soon, the little pricks in your relationship spread past closed doors and into your schoolwork. Sharing a major and classes with your significant other was not exactly ideal, especially when they had different values and beliefs from you and had to argue for their reasoning.

“That just isn’t sustainable in the long run though,” you commented as you read through Chenle’s senior research report while seated opposite of him inside a library study room.

He ran a hand through his hair, leaning back into his seat, about to repeat himself for the fourth time. “It’s not about sustainability, it’s about the profit margin that’s being made. What don’t you get?”

“It’s not good for the environment, it’s not good for the people working in the factories,” you point out, “I don’t get how you can subject these things onto people.”

“Y/n, we’re business majors,” he stated plainly, “we study money, the economy, sales, company relationships, we’re not here to be environmentalists. Things don’t have to last very long, so much as they make a profit.”

“But we should think about the impact of our future businesses and their longevity in the world-”

“You should think about passing this class and stop being so prissy and uptight about saving trees or whatever the fuck you’re going on about.”

You were absolutely shocked at the words that had just come out of his mouth. This wasn’t the first time he had seemingly degraded you in this manner, but when it came to school and your own work, you were deeply offended at what he had said, especially since both of you had spent many hours on your respective projects.

“Chenle,” you began softly, “tell me you didn’t mean that.”

He refused to meet your gaze, “If I told you that then I would be a liar.”

“Look, you can’t just spew whatever bullshit you want and just expect that people won’t get hurt,” you criticized, only to be cut off once more.

“Then maybe you should learn to not take everything so seriously,” he snapped back.

“I...I think we need a break.”

“Agreed.”

“No, from each other.” Chenle’s head whipped up to look at you, his eyes went wide when he realized what you were insinuating.

“Baby no, you know it’s not like that,” he started, but it was already too late. You blocked his voice out of your head as you packed your belongings, just wanting to get out of this room, wanting to get away from him.

This wasn’t the first time you had fought with him in this way but it felt like you had finally lost all your patience. You were tired of always being told you were wrong and having your thoughts and ideas invalidated. As you stormed away from the library, you realized that maybe you needed to let go of things that no longer brought you joy.

Sometimes letting go...is a new start

After that incident, you did indeed have a fresh start. You slowly removed Chenle from your life and just in time for graduation. Whenever he tried to approach you on campus, you always turned the other way even if it meant being late to class. Luckily, you didn’t have many shared classes with him anymore and you were all the more grateful for it right now.

You’d come back to your campus apartment with the occasional flower or sticky note left on your doorstep asking you to give him another chance but you simply didn’t have enough time or energy to care anymore. Commencement was approaching and you still had yet to hear back from any of the companies you had applied to for internships.

But that don’t mean that we can’t live here in the moment

One of your friends had mentioned that Chenle had already received news that he was accepted into his family’s business, a large company in China, and you wished you could’ve been there when he had read the email. You could practically hear his yell of delight, his laugh when he’d turn to hug you, even if it was practically guaranteed that he’d get in, you missed it all so much but there was no turning back now.

It wasn’t until after commencement did you receive your own letter of acceptance from one of the largest foreign trade companies in the area after you saw Chenle for the last time. “Zhong Chenle, Bachelor of Arts in business management.” You remembered the immense pride and pain you felt in your chest, watching him walk across the stage to claim his diploma as you sat clothed in the same cap and gown only a few rows away. You wished you could share your emotions with him, but you had to remind yourself that he was no longer yours, he was no longer the man you first fell in love with.

‘Cause I can be the one you love from time to time

Four years have passed since that moment at commencement. In those four years, you’ve climbed your way up in the company, taking a hold of a directing position in project development and management. With all your success though, there was always one failure that kept floating through your mind. The number of sleepless nights and wandering moments you’ve spent thinking about all the ‘what ifs’ and the changes you should’ve made in your relationship have all decreased with time, but sometimes it all comes crashing back. You miss the memories you made with him and you miss being so young and naive.

Sometimes you managed to hear a thing or two about the company he worked for but you never paid much attention to it, always falling back into a spiral of guilt and calling yourself the sole reason why your relationship fell apart. Chenle would even pop into your mind at the weirdest times when you’d be thinking of anything but him.

Like the other day as you were staring out the window of your office, watching people and cars pass by, your memory of Chenle speeding down the empty highway suddenly resurfaced. The adrenaline you felt from the buildings and signs whizzing by, the slight buzz of alcohol you felt in your system, the cool air coming in from Chenle’s window, the warmth of his hand in yours. You couldn’t help but smile at it fondly yet it turned sour when you thought of the last time he ever drove you somewhere. You had argued with him about something dumb, you couldn’t even remember it at this point, and you even slammed the door before storming off to who knows where.

Or some months ago, you were interviewing possible new hires for the company and met someone from Puerto Rico. Once you finished the interview with them, you sat at the wooden desk while remembering the way you teased Chenle because he didn’t know how to pronounce Puerto Rico. You thought it was cute and even told him that, but it ended up in another fight because you may have spent a little too long dwelling on the topic.

But oftentimes when you find yourself thinking about him, you’d wonder how he’s doing. Is he happy where he is right now? What kinds of things is he doing for his job? Has he found a new girlfriend? What if he dated many other people after me? What if he’s married? Would he have children by now? Or most importantly, ‘does he still love me?’

And if you like midnight driving with the windows down, and if you like going places we can’t even pronounce

Regardless, you’d shake off all these thoughts and continue about your day, completing the tasks assigned to you. The majority of your time was spent conducting interviews and deliberating with the directors about who to hire for what position. It was quite fun, really. You got to meet all of the new hires before they came into the company and you felt empowered by the fact that you would be indirectly responsible for the future of the company in this sort of way.

On one particular day, everything felt like it was going just a little too well. Your hair was done just the right way, traffic was light, your coworkers seemed to all be in a good mood, but most importantly, there were no fat folders sitting on your desk, waiting for you to go through. Just a single sheet of paper with the list of the new hires coming in for their briefings along with the notes you were required to go over.

You didn’t bother checking it, seeing as how you had exactly two minutes left before the scheduled meet time, which was exactly the amount of time you needed to head downstairs to the conference room. You really should have checked the list though. It would have prepared you for the shock of seeing a certain someone sitting at the table in a suit that looked all too good on him.

“Zhong Chenle?” You audibly gasped, pausing in your tracks the moment you entered the conference room.

His eyes were already on you as if he knew you’d be the person to walk through that doorway at that exact moment. “That would be me.”

The other new hires looked around at each other sharing all types of glances. Worried, suspicious, surprised, questioning, nothing really all that positive. “Sorry, he’s just an old friend that I was surprised to see,” you quickly explained, trying to pull yourself back together.

Throughout your whole presentation, it was like all the attention in the world was directed at you. Never had you felt this nervous before doing something that was supposed to be so familiar. Every time your eyes glanced over in Chenle’s direction, his gaze managed to catch yours as if he was trying to speak to you without any words.

By the time you adjourned the meeting and sent the new hires off to their respective departments, it felt like you had run a marathon. Your palms were clammy, your legs shaky, your mind racing, and your heart was pounding.

Chenle was the only one left in the conference hall while you pushed in all the chairs and turned off the lights. “Looks like these years have done you well.” He commented, finally able to take in the sight of you now that there was no one else around.

“I could say the same for you.” His shoulder had gotten broader and any childlike features had left his face. He truly looked like he had grown into a man. The dark gray suit he was wearing fit the lines of his body so well, it made you think he could’ve been a model instead of simply becoming an office worker. “So how have you been?”

He did a classic Chenle shrug, “nothing much really. I started off being just a marketing employee, did some work, and got myself to be chief marketing officer. It seems you’ve gotten much further than I have, though. Project development and management?”

“Oh, it’s not anything huge. I just help with planning things out and doing all the paperwork for its execution. I only do interviews and help with hiring when we’re in season, which would be why I’m here right now,” you explained, motioning for him to follow you out of the room. “Your new supervisor is probably wondering where you are. I sent the rest of the newbies a few minutes ago already. I’ll just tell him that you had a few questions about our operations.”

“Wow, cheating the system? That’s not the way I remember you,” Chenle said with mock disapproval. You led him to the elevators, pleasantly surprised to find one still on your floor after you hit the ‘up’ button. Your eyes met with his while you gestured for him to go in. “Ladies first,” he had a cat-like grin on his face as you rolled your eyes and stepped into the elevator.

“So why did you decide to leave your company? Weren’t you going to take it over someday?” You ask over the squeaking of the doors closing.

Chenle leaned against the cold metal wall of the elevator, “I still plan to but I felt like they were just kind of babying me or treating me differently because they knew of my background,” he explained. You could only nod to acknowledge the fact that you were listening. “I told my parents that I wanted to get experience outside of the company and they didn’t really understand at first until I showed them my point of view and how it’s a little worrisome to perhaps, learn how to cook when you always have chefs around you giving you instructions down to the tiniest things.”

The elevator came to a stop and the heavy doors opened onto the floor Chenle would be working on. “But why this company? We’re not even closely related to yours?” You led him down the hallway in the direction of his supervisor's office.

“My parents were the ones who recommended it, actually. It would be a little risky to go to a neighboring one in the case of it being viewed as a betrayal or like some kind of inside mission so they said I should just come back here since I’d probably have a high chance of acceptance-“ you put a hand up to stop him from talking, seeing how many of the other employees had started to look at him due to his volume.

“Chenle, must I remind you that this is an office?” You gritted out, embarrassed in front of your colleagues.

He shook his head before turning to the mass of them, bowing politely then continuing in the same direction as before. Once both of you reached the head office at the end of the hallway, Chenle spoke up once more. “By any chance, are you free tonight?”

“That depends,” you began, “what are you hinting at?”

“Just seeing if you’d like to go out to dinner so we can properly catch up, I guess,” he proposed bashfully.

You hummed in thought, “mmm, put in a good word for me with your supervisor and you’ve got a deal.”

“Deal,” he agreed.

“Meet me in the lobby at 5:30, don’t be late,” you told him before knocking on the wooden door in front of you and allowing Chenle in.

If you like to do whatever you’ve been dreaming about, then baby you’re perfect

You thought Chenle’s wine phase in college would be just that, a phase, but it really wasn’t. He had ordered an expensive bottle of merlot even with all your insistence that you wouldn’t be drinking and even made him promise that he’d be sober enough to drive himself back to wherever his accommodations were.

He made a face of fake dismissal before picking up your last conversation. “So anyway, as I was saying earlier, my parents suggested that I come back here, especially since I got my degree from the university so I’m bound to get in.”

You were about to open your mouth to say something like “getting in is not a guarantee” especially coming from your experience in doing interviews and having to decide which applicants to turn down, but you decided against it.

“Initially, I was a little against it since I didn’t want to come back to somewhere I’ve already stayed at for some time,” he confessed, “but after I did some research on the company and found out that you’re one of the associates, I was a little more open to the idea.”

There was a break of silence while you started to link your thoughts together. “So you came here because you found out that I work here?”

“Yes, but also no,” Chenle stated, blurting the second part out rather quickly when he saw the shift in your expression. “It is true that I wanted to see you and how you were doing but it’s not just that. I figured that if you worked here and had such a high position, it must be a good place to work.”

“But what I’m hearing is…you came here because of me,” you state bluntly though your heart couldn’t help but let out a cheer of delight.

Chenle redirected his gaze at the neighboring tables. “You could say that, sure.”

“Chenle, what do you want out of this? What do you want out of me specifically?” You contended. His eyes continued to flit around the lowly lit space, not daring to meet yours unlike earlier in the conference hall. “What? Did you come back just expecting me to run into your arms? Did you think we would just pick up where we left off?”

Now he looked down at the white tablecloth, as if in shame. “Would it be wrong of me to ask for a second chance?”

You too joined him in staring at the table, wishing that he had answered ‘no’ to your previous questions. “It wouldn’t exactly be wrong, but it’s not right either. I’d be willing to give you a second chance if we agree to not call it that, but rather a promise.”

He finally looked up at you again, his dark pupils catching the dim golden lights above him. “A promise?”

You nodded. “We’re older now, we’re fully grown adults with jobs to do and taxes to pay. We’re no longer the same carefree college students we used to be.”

“Well yeah, obviously-“

“No, listen,” you interject, cutting him off, “we can’t just recklessly play with each other’s minds and feelings like we used to. No more games and no more ‘next times.’ If we try again, I want this to be a promise that we’ll both do better because we can and we want to.”

“If it’s a promise that you want then,” Chenle held out his hand with his pinky finger extended, “it’s a promise I’m willing to make.”

You linked your pinky with his before bringing your thumbs together and sealing the promise. Matching smiles appeared across both of your faces as you stepped into a new chapter of life with Chenle by your side once more.

Sometimes letting go is…perfect. So let’s start right now

[drabbles-mc]

One Of Them Girls (Part 2)

Angel Reyes x F!Reader

A follow-up to This Request from @lakamaa12​

Warnings: language, slight steam towards the end, Angel being?? the sweetest human

Word Count: 4.4k

A/N: Back by popular demand! It took me a little bit to get into the groove of a part 2 for this one but I really like how it turned out. Angel is the sweetest and he deserves the best. Hope y’all enjoy!

Angel Reyes Taglist: @mayans-sauce​ @encounterthepast​ @helli4nthus​ @lilacyennefer​ @angelreyesgirl​ @everyhowlmarksthedead​ @starrynite7114​ @rosieposie0624​ @queenbeered​ @mylittlelonelyappreciationtoo​ @sincerelyasomebody​ @mijop​ @sadeyesgf​ @xladymacbethx​ @thesandbeneathmytoes​ @blessedboo​ @appropriate-writers-name​ @holl2712​ @tomhardydallasstarsgirl​ @multiyfandomgirl40​ @sillygoose6969​ @beardburnsupersoldiers​ @louisianalady​ @gemini0410​ @paintballkid711​ @chibsytelford​ @yourwonkywriter​ @sesamepancakes​ @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead​ @georgiaaintnopeach​  @plentyoffandoms @twistnet​ @themoonandthewicked​ @garbinge​ @bucky-iss-bae​ @enjoy-the-destruction

You woke up late the next morning to the sound of your roommate clamoring around in the kitchen. You wanted to be annoyed but when you looked at the clock, your eyes went wide. It was almost noon—and you had to be at work in two hours. You let out a deep sigh as you got out of bed.

You got ready as quickly as you could, opting out of doing much of anything with your makeup and hair. It wasn’t like your manager was going to care anyway. You strode into the kitchen, immediately grabbing a travel mug from the cabinet for your coffee.

“You slept late,” Elena said with a hint of amusement in her tone, “Long night?”

You chuckled and shook your head as you dumped coffee into your mug, “Not like whatever it is that you’re thinking. He just gave me a ride home, that’s it.”

“Mhm,” she leaned back against the counter, unable to wipe the smile off of her face, “You left his hoodie hanging off the bathroom door.”

You sighed, looking up at the ceiling, “It was cold, and he let me borrow it.”

“You can say you like him, you know,” she laughed, “The ground isn’t gonna open underneath you if you say you think some guy is cute.”

You smiled but shook your head, “I gotta go—slept through my alarm,” you gathered up your purse and keys, “You got plans tonight?”

She shook her head, “Nope. You?”

“None at all,” you laughed, “I’m recovering from all the human interaction yesterday.”

“Thanks for coming. I know you didn’t really want to.”

You took a sip of your coffee, “Hate to say it, but it was actually pretty fun. So, thank you,” you chuckled, “But I’m not doing shit once I get home from work tonight. No extra human interaction for me.”

You said goodbye and took off out the door. You hadn’t even made it to work yet and you already couldn’t wait to be back home. There was one more semester between you and finishing college, and you couldn’t wait until you could actually get a full-time job that you enjoyed. You were lucky that you worked in a restaurant where your coworkers and your boss were all good people, but you couldn’t wait to be done with it.

When you came home, you were hit with a wave of heat and the scent of good food as soon as you walked through the door. Your body instantly relaxed as you kicked off your shoes and tossed your purse onto the couch. Elena watched and shook her head at you with a smile.

“Welcome home, honey,” she laughed as she grabbed plates out of the cupboard.

You laughed, “So glad I get to come home to you,” you walked into the kitchen and looked over everything that she was making, “Real talk though, thanks for taking care of dinner.”

“Think of it as my thank you for coming out with me last night.”

“Are you trying to reward me into socializing with people?”

She laughed, “Would it work?”

You looked back at the food, “…maybe.”

“Speaking of which,” she started piling food onto her plate, “Angel texted me today.”

“Everything alright?”

She waited for you to look at her again, “He asked about you.”

You already had a forkful of food in your mouth, “What about me?”

She laughed, “He was just letting me know that he had a really good time with you and wanted to see you again. I guess after the whole ass-beating comment he felt like he had to get my approval. Which…was smart of him,” she smiled.

You laughed, “Oh my god,” you shook your head, “Put the fear of god in the poor guy.”

Despite the fact that you were trying to play it off, you couldn’t deny that the fact that Angel had reached out to her about you felt good. It made you feel like he might’ve been taking the whole thing at least a little seriously. You didn’t know just how serious you were looking for things to be, but you knew you weren’t in the mood to be jerked around by anyone.

Elena must’ve seen each thought cross your face because she nudged you gently as you both walked over to the couch, “You good?”

You snapped out of it, nodding, “Yea, I’m good.”

“If you don’t wanna see him again, you don’t have to,” she took a bite of her food, “I mean I love the guys but I’d be the first to say that they aren’t for everyone.”

“No,” you shook your head, “It’s not that. It’s just, I dunno. I don’t even know what I’m up for, you know?”

She nodded, “I know. I think he might be good for you, honestly. He’s a good guy. A little impulsive sometimes,” she shook her head with a smile, “But he’s got a good heart.”

You knew that she wasn’t lying about that. You could feel that emanating from him when the two of you were sitting and talking the night before. You nodded and didn’t say anything more about it. She put a show on the television and your previous conversation fell by the wayside. It was hard not to think about it, though.

Once you were done with dinner, you hopped in the shower. You were in your room, getting ready to change into your pajamas for the night when your phone started to go off on your bed. Seeing Angel’s name flashing on the screen sent nervousness and excitement through you at the same time. You sat down on the bed still in your towel and took a deep breath before answering.

“Hello?”

“Hey,” you could hear the smile in his voice.

“Everything alright?”

“Yea,” he chuckled, “just wanted to make sure you really gave me the right number.”

You laughed, “For a moment I thought about playing the John Cena theme song just to give you a good scare.”

Along with his laughter you could hear a lot of voices in the background, and you assumed that he was at the clubhouse, “Your sweetness overwhelms me.”

You couldn’t help but to laugh, “Believe it or not, that’s not the first time someone has said that to me,” you paused, biting at your lip as you waited for him to say why he was calling, “Not that I don’t want to hear from you, but was there a reason you called?”

The pause that followed was unsettling, but finally you heard him take a breath, “Yea. I, uh, I just wanted to know if you’d want to go out sometime,” he paused for a moment, “With me.”

You smiled, “With you? I mean, in that case,” you let slip a quiet laugh, “I might be able to budget some time in my schedule.”

“Really?”

“Not even I am mean enough to joke about that,” you chuckled.

He laughed, “Okay. Wow. Um, okay, yea. How…how does Thursday night sound?”

“Sounds good.”

You could hear him let out a sigh of relief, “I’ll pick you up at seven?”

“It’s a date,” just saying the words made you feel giddy. You were curious about one thing, though, “What made you decide to call and ask?”

His laughter had a touch of nervousness to it and you found it hard to believe that he was a man that got nervous about much of anything, “I was gonna wait a couple days so you wouldn’t think that I was a creep. Or a clinger,” he laughed for a moment, “But I, um, I couldn’t get you outta my head.”

Your entire body felt warm, “You’re sweet.”

“Sometimes,” he laughed, “Also Coco said that if I didn’t say something he would call you up and say something for me. And neither of us want that.”

You shook your head and laughed, “Right.”

There was a beat of silence, “So I’ll see you Thursday?”

“I’ll see you Thursday.”

The relief was palpable in his voice, “Alright. Have a good night, querida.”

You were thankful that he couldn’t see the cheesy grin on your face, “You too, Angel.”

You hung up the call and tossed your phone to the side as you flopped backwards onto your bed, still wrapped in your towel. You couldn’t wipe the smile off your face as you stared up at the ceiling. You covered your face with your hands, unable to remember the last time a phone call left you feeling so giddy.

As if on cue, Elena came sliding into your room, “Did I just hear you confirm a date with Angel?” her smile stretched from ear to ear, clearly thankful for the thin walls of your apartment.

You wanted to have a witty remark but you were too busy being excited. You laughed and nodded, “You did.”

“Yes!” she ran over and tackled you in a hug on the bed, “Oh this is so exciting!”

You laughed as you felt her practically vibrating with excitement for you, “What’d I just get myself into?”

“An adventure!”

You had lived through a lot of weeks that seemed to drag on, but nothing quite like the week leading up to your date with Angel. Focusing in your classes was doable, but it wasn’t easy when you could feel your phone vibrating inside your backpack with texts from Angel. It caught you by surprise that he was able to text you and keep a conversation going all day—the two of you didn’t seem to run out of things to talk about and it was refreshing.

Your work shift on Wednesday night felt like it lasted for a lot longer than six hours. You just wanted to get the day over with already so it would finally be Thursday. In all of your conversations during the week, Angel had never let slip what the plan was for your date the following night. It was a little maddening but you also couldn’t deny that you liked the slight mystery of it all. He had done you the courtesy of letting you know that you wouldn’t have to dress up for it.

“You sure you’re not just setting me up to be super underdressed?” you asked while you talked on the phone with him Thursday afternoon.

He laughed, “That’d be funny, but I promise I’m not doing that.”

“Hmm,” you held the phone loosely in your hand while you pulled random tops out of your closet, “I don’t know if I believe you.”

“No trust,” his smile was audible.

“Don’t take it so personally,” you chuckled.

“You worry too much, querida,” he laughed, “You’ll look great no matter what. I’ll see you in a few hours, alright?”

“Alright, I’ll see you in a bit.”

The two of you said a quick goodbye and you tossed your phone aside with a sigh. Being told to wear whatever for a date felt like a trap. You had a number of shirts laid out in front of you, taking over your bed. Part of you wanted to do the unthinkable and ask Elena for fashion advice, but you weren’t sure you were ready for everything that might entail, especially if it was supposed to be casual.

You mulled over your choices for a minute too long, though. She was walking by to go to the kitchen when she saw you standing in your leggings and bra, looking over your choices. She poked her head in and cleared her throat louder than necessary.

“Can I weigh in?”

“Would me saying no even matter?”

“Nope!” she laughed as she walked over and looked at the shirts on your bed, “Where you guys going?”

You shrugged helplessly, “No clue—he won’t tell me. He just said that I could wear whatever I want, whatever I’m comfortable in. Said it’s nothing fancy,” you paused, “Should I believe him?”

She nodded, “Yea, I don’t think he’d lie about that,” she tapped her chin, seemingly deep in thought, “The red top is cute, plus it’ll look nice with the leggings.”

“Yea?”

“Yea,” she picked it up and handed it to you, “He’s gonna think you’re hot regardless of what you wear. As he should,” she chuckled.

You had to laugh as you pulled the shirt on over your head, “Thank you.”

She left you to your own devices after her initial piece of advice. You knew that you were getting ready way ahead of schedule, and that realistically all you were going to do was sit and wait and let yourself get more jittery than necessary. But now that you had started getting ready it was hard to distract yourself and kill time until Angel came to get you.

You took longer than necessary with your hair and makeup solely to try and keep yourself busy for as long as possible. Every few minutes you looked over and checked the time on your phone, each time disappointed that more time hadn’t gone by. You drummed your fingernails on the surface of your dresser, trying to think of ways to fill the remaining time before Angel showed up to pick you up.

“You can come out here and help me with laundry if you’re that bored,” you heard Elena call from the living room with a laugh, “I can hear your fingernails from here.”

You laughed but caved and made your way out to her, finding a spot on the couch next to her in the mess of unfolded, clean clothes. She tossed you a shirt and you shook your head as you began to fold and stack with her, glad to have a menial task to fill the time and keep you from going too insane.

The two of you were wrapped up in a conversation, and you had completely lost track of the time, when you heard a knock at the door. Your eyes grew wide and you checked the time on your phone, cursing under your breath as you stood up. You asked Elena to go and answer the door while you went to find a pair of shoes to wear.

You could hear the two of them chatting and laughing as you grabbed a cute pair of sneakers that had gotten shoved underneath your bed at some point. You were pulling it over the heel of your foot, hopping down the hallway towards the living room where Angel stood waiting for you.

You felt your eyes go wide as you looked at him. He looked like a completely different man without his kutte on for some reason. He just had a plain black t-shirt on with his jeans and work boots, but for some reason you felt all of your words get caught in your throat.

“You look great,” he said with a smile, “You ready to go?”

You nodded, “Yea, yea I’m good.”

You walked over and were following him out the door when Elena caught you gently by the arm, “Relax. Have a good time. If you need to bail just text me and I’ll totally call with a fake emergency.”

You laughed, “I don’t think that’ll be necessary, but thank you.”

“Text me when you get there,” she gave you a quick hug goodbye.

“Will do. Love you.”

“Love you too,” she waved and shut the door after you.

You met Angel in the lobby of your apartment building. He looked over at you with a smile, “All good?”

You nodded, “All good. Elena was just making sure I still had my pepper spray.”

“I’ll never know peace with you two around, will I?”

You laughed, shaking your head, “Not at all.”

“You up for another ride on the bike? Or was the first ride too traumatizing for you?”

You rolled your eyes, “I’ll be fine.”

Handing over his helmet with a smile, Angel climbed onto his bike and waited for you to hop on behind him. You got situated, arms wrapping around him much more comfortably this time around. You rested your chin on top of his shoulder for a moment, a smile creeping across your face.

“So do I get to know what we’re doing, yet?”

“Nope,” he shook his head with a laugh, “Hang on tight, Y/N.”

The way your name rolled off his tongue left butterflies in your stomach, but you didn’t get too much time to think about it as he peeled away from the curb and took off down the street. Besides the roar of his motorcycle, your laughter was the only thing that either of you could hear as he tore down the street. You could feel his body shake slightly with laughter beneath your arms as he drove.

The streetlights blurred as the two of you raced by them. Even if the city was whipping by you at race-like speeds, you had to admit that there was something beautiful about all of it. Despite the fact that there was no pausing to look at anything for too long, flying past dimly-lit storefronts in your sleepy little town felt like an adventure all its own when you found yourself latched to Angel.

Your ride didn’t last nearly long enough. As excited as you were to get to the next part of your date, you could’ve spent the whole evening just doing that. He rolled into the driveway of a house, one that you had to assume was his. You couldn’t hide the fact that you were surprised as he parked the bike and hopped off, holding out his hands to help you do the same.

You hung the helmet off the handlebar as you looked back and forth between Angel and his house. He saw the slight look of confusion on your face and chuckled, “Everything alright?”

You laughed, trying to play it off, “Yea, just figured you’d take me to dinner before you tried to take me home.”

He shook his head as he gently rested his hand on the small of your back and guided you up the driveway, “It’s a one-stop shop, baby,” he couldn’t contain his laughter at the way you rolled your eyes at him, “Nah but I know you said you really don’t like going out and doing shit around people. Figured this might be more your speed?”

Your face got hot for a moment and you nodded, “Thank you.”

“It ain’t much,��� Angel said as he unlocked the door, “But the kitchen works which is the most important thing.”

You chuckled and nodded in agreement as you followed him into his house. Once you slipped out of your shoes you looked around, trying to get a feel for what you were walking into. You had the feeling that he put a little extra effort into straightening up the place given the current circumstances. Even so, his house still felt very much like a home. It wasn’t overly cluttered, but there were a good number of photos on the walls, along with more than a couple bookshelves that were filled to the brim in the living room, taking up wall space on either side of his television.

“I prepped most of it,” Angel said as he walked over to the kitchen, “Just gotta put it together. Shouldn’t take too long. You can snoop around while you wait if you want,” there was a knowing smirk on his face.

You laughed, “There’ll be plenty of time for snooping. I’m much more interested to see what you can do in the kitchen.”

“You think I can’t cook?”

“It’s not one of the first skills I would’ve assumed you had, no.”

“No fuckin’ trust,” he laughed.

You found yourself leaning against the counter, watching him as he started pulling everything together for dinner. You had to admit that you were impressed by his culinary skills. For a man who didn’t come off as someone who spent a whole lot of time in the kitchen, he seemed to have a pretty good idea of what he was doing. Or if he didn’t, he was good at faking it.

“You should keep your fingers curled a little more,” you commented as you watched him start to slice the items laid out on the cutting board.

“What?” he looked over at you.

“Yea, like this, lemme show you,” you took the knife from him and showed him the proper way to keep your fingers bent, “That way you won’t accidentally cut the tips of your fingers off. Keeping them intact will probably make it easier to ride, yea?”

He chuckled as he took the knife back from you, “Maybe.”

That was the last time you interjected into his process unless he asked you to grab something out of the fridge or one of the cabinets for him. It was peaceful, comfortable, moving around the kitchen with him.

“You want to pick a movie to watch with dinner?” he asked as he was finishing things up on the stove.

“Sure! You’re not gonna cut off any fingers while I’m gone, are you?”

“I think I’ll be alright. I made it this many years and I still got all ten.”

You laughed as you walked into the living room and plopped down on the couch. You scrolled through what Netflix was recommending for him, trying to get a good gauge on what you should be choosing. This definitely felt like it was a little bit of a test.

“Sorry if there’s weird shit popping up on there,” he chuckled, “Coco uses mine and his interests are…unique.”

You laughed, “So that’s your story?”

“And I’m sticking to it,” he smiled at you as he brought over two plates, setting them down on the coffee table before disappearing back into the kitchen to grab drinks for the two of you.

Dinner was much better than you initially thought it was going to be. He was certainly a man that was full of surprises. You had to admit that you were surprised at how comfortable you felt around him, especially in his own house. He was making a conscious effort to try and be as open and inviting as possible, and it was working.

Once you were both done eating, you found yourself nestled up against his side, his arm draped around your shoulders. His thumb traced lightly back and forth as his eyes stayed focused on the movie. You tried to stay focused, but it was difficult. You reached and draped your arm across his stomach while you laid against him and you felt him chuckle.

“Comfortable?”

You looked up at him with a smile, “Yea. You?”

He gave you a light squeeze, “Yea.”

The two of you fell silent for a few minutes before Angel started his own commentary about what was going on in the movie. You had to laugh, shaking your head as he successfully ruined every serious moment. It was obvious that both of you had seen the film before, because you were both cracking jokes about it.

When the credits started to roll, Angel looked down at you with a smile, “Thanks for doing this with me.”

You sat upright, “Of course. No need to thank me—I’ve been looking forward to this all week.”

“Hopefully it lived up to your expectations?”

You nodded, “Surpassed them for sure. Like I said, I didn’t think you could cook,” you laughed.

He chuckled and shook his head as he stood up, collecting your plates, “Y’know sometimes you can just be nice.”

You watched him, trying to ignore the butterflies taking over your stomach, “But where’s the fun in that?”

He walked back over, standing by the couch with a smile tugging at the edges of his mouth. You could see that there were a lot of thoughts running around his brain. “We can totally watch part 2, which was basically made to be made fun of, unless you wanna get going—”

“No,” you cut him off, biting your lip lightly at how eager you knew you sounded, “I’m in no rush, really. I’ll totally stay and talk shit for a few more hours.”

He smiled as he sat back down next to you, motioning for you to come and curl back up against his side again, “Sounds good to me.”

Your hand was resting against his chest as you laughed at a stupid joke he’d just made. You felt his hand come to rest over yours, completely enveloping it for a moment. It sent a wave of warmth throughout your entire body. You almost didn’t realize what was happening as he lifted your hand and pressed a kiss to your knuckles. Your entire face started to get hot as you looked up at him. There was a smirk on his face and you knew that he knew exactly what he was doing to you, even if you didn’t want to give him that kind of satisfaction.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked.

You smiled, finding yourself biting back a laugh as you nodded, “Yea, I think I’ll allow that.”

He laughed, “I did cook you dinner like you asked, right?”

You rolled your eyes, smile still taking over your features, “Don’t make me change my mind.”

“Right, right,” he gently cupped your face in his hand and pulled your lips to his.

Almost instantly you felt yourself melting into him. Your hand still rested on his chest and you could feel how quickly his heart was beating. You smiled into the kiss as you felt his thumb glide gently across your cheek while his lips moved against yours.

Without giving it much of a second thought, you shifted yourself so that you were in his lap, straddling him. His arms fell naturally around your waist, keeping you pulled tight against his chest. Your hands rested on either side of his neck, fingertips tracing along his jawline as he continued to deepen your kiss, biting lightly at your bottom lip.

You pulled away to catch your breath, your lips mere centimeters away from his. Your entire body felt like it was on fire and you couldn’t remember the last time someone had made you feel that way from just a kiss.

He let out a breathy laugh as his hand ran up and down your back, “You’re somethin’ else, Y/N.”

“You don’t even know the half of it,” you laughed as you leaned back, trailing your fingers lightly through his beard.

He lifted and easily shifted you so that you were draped across his lap, curled up into his chest. One hand rested on your side while the other landed on your knee. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, “I’m more than willing to find out if you’ll let me.”

You smiled up at him, “I just might.”

[haechanokeh]

I'm Right For You [ pt. 5 ]

[teaser/ prologue] [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ] [ 4 ] [ 5 ] [ 6 ] [ 7 ] [ 8 ]

(you can play Die For You by The Weeknd while reading this 😌)

pairing: popular college! mark x average! reader

genre: romance, smut, angst, series.

warning: corruption, oral sex (both receiving and giving), cream pie, rough sex, anal sex, mention of religion, rough sex, self-esteem, psychology, public sex, sub! reader, sex toys. possessive mark two-faced mark

you were wincing in pain while walking, it hurts like a motherfcker. you're blaming yourself for being horny and part of you blaming mark's dick. you have 10 missed calls from mark but you haven't got a chance to answer it because you're eating outside and you badly don't want to deal with him. you both agreed to what happened last night but you just felt annoyed by his length and thickness. mark may look so kind and innocent but once his perverted side clicked, he's literally a monster which turns you on.

he introduced a new side of yourself and you hate it because the more you allow it that side of you the more you become greedy for a man who's very different from you.

you crumpled the cheese burger paper wrap, you stood up from the park's bench enduring the pain and threw the paper on the trash bin. you were holding the back of your hip and literally dragging your feet to move when suddenly a woman's voice called your name. you turned your head and saw mina with mark, she was holding onto the sleeve of track suit mark wearing. you felt like something pressed your lungs. mark was just staring at you and scanned your body.

mark noticed your discomfortness in walking before mina called you. he already thought that you were sore from last night. mina was with him because they met coincidentally. mina who's grabbing his sleeves pulled him and both of them walk towards you.

"you live around here? wow i didn't know that." she cheerfully said. of course nobody would know, you're very timid and hard to approach.

"yes, ahm… i need to go home. my mom is waiting for me." you awkwardly said.. mark knew you were lying.

before he went out of your house, he saw your mother's note on top of the tv's table. mark noticed that everytime you want to get away or run away, you always use your mom as an excuse. he could see how uncomfortable you were seeing mina too and that you badly want to go home considering you're sore.

"i'll take you home." when mark moved, mina's hand separated from his sleeves. but before mark get closer to you, you gave him a stone face.

"no." mark was astonished from your icy voice. "i can manage. thank you." you said and turned your back walking away from them unnoticeably fast despite your discomfort.

it's already your lunch and since you don't know how to cook, you're contemplating whether you'll eat outside or just order for delivery…

well that's what you were supposed to be thinking but you were overwhelmed by your nonsense unfamiliar emotion when you saw them together. you fear that this emotion will break you.

"this is why i told you to distance yourself!" you told yourself and pulled out your hair in annoyance and frustration.

the thought of you being sexually frustrated lingered in your brain and you impulsively opened your wardrobe and dig to find your vibrator that you ordered last year for fun. you felt embarrassed buying it and using it so you hide it. plus, you're afraid that it will take away your virginity and it'll be hurt…. well fuck it now you know what it feels like.

you put the remote's battery and slowly put the small bullet inside you.

the sound of doorbell made you jump and you panicky ran to open the door. but to your disappointment it was just mark. yes, you are disappointed because he's the last person you want to talk or see right now. he's the reason why your head was spinning and throbbing and these overwhelming unpleasant feeling.

"what now?" you were rude and you slightly felt guilty. however mark didn't notice that, he was staring down but not to you so you followed where he was staring at… "shit." you hid behind your back and blood rushed up to your face. you hope that he didn't know what kind of remote it is but fuck the generic neon pink rmeote is very recognizable.

you saw the space between mark's brows wrinkled but it was quick. then look up to your face.

"are you okay? still sore? have you eaten lunch yet?" mark worriedly asked you these questions though something with his voice and face were unsettling.

you swallowed and looked everywhere but him

"ahm, of course. my mom cooked for me, ah! my mom is upstairs by the-" you were trying to hoax him that you're not alone.

"saw her not on the table." he said in a serious tone and stepped inside your house. he literally pushed you aside and walked in. your jaw dropped.

"eat before you…" he put a paper bag (that you didn't noticed that he was bringing with him) on the living room's small table. "do your priorities." he glanced at your arm and back to your eyes. you lowered your eyes.

"why are you doing this, all for me?" you asked. he stood up and crossed his arm. fuck that was hot.

"i told you i like you. i care for people who i like." he said and brough put one by one the items inside the paper bag.

"how about mina?" you gasped when you heard yourself said that instead of keeping it in your brain. his brow raised.

"mina? what about mina?" he confusingly asked them later it slowly registered to him. "ahh… it was a coincidence. why? are you jealous? just tell me if you want me to stop talking to her." he teased you with a cheeky grin and you're aware that mark was just teasing you. butfor mark? nah, if you want to ask him to do that he is willing to do that for you.

mark already committed everything for you.

"what me?" you scoffed in disbelief. "i told you i don't like you okay?" you rudely said.

mark just chuckled, he didn't believe you. between the two of you, mark is the sensible one.

"yeah. now c'mon let's eat." he said and sat on a single couch.

you walked and sat on your favorite long sofa but you're sitting at the end near to mark.

"we will only eat, right?" you gave him a suspicious look. he chuckled and opened the tonkatsu for you and pushed it in front of you.

his hand was quick when he grabbed the remote from your hand. you almost stood up to take it back from him but he pushed your forehead.

"eat." mark gave you wide eyes that warned you to eat first.

this is very awkward. but thank goodness it was mark, i mean much better right? if it was another person, like your mom? you won't be seeing your tomorrow.

you were eating quietly still feeling irritated at mark but your attention is on the remote which is near on mark's hand which is across from you.

"focu on your food, y/n." he said , glancing at you with a smile.

"can't you give that back to me?"

"what? this?" he innocently held the remote and show it to you but you felt something inside you vibrating that caught you off guard. you gasped and covered your mouth and your other hand went on your pussy.

"mark!" you glared at him.

"then finish your lunch." he told you but you badly want to take the remote from him. so you stood up and tried to reach it from his hand but he swiftly moved it away from you and accidentally pushed the increase intensity which made you bend down, groaning.

you held on his shoulder and your other hand on top of mark's knees, you were doing this as support. mark don't want to turn off the vibrator once he saw your reaction. something itched on again in him.

"mark, stop or else- oh my gosh…" you shivered when he increased the intensity.

"i love you." mark said out of no where. was it the the way you look right now that satisfied him? but whatever is the reason, he should've not said that..

you became serious and glared at him. your hand go down to you and pulled out the bullet.

mark watched you but he noticed your displeased face.

"get out." you said. "you're a smart person. you know what does it mean." you stood up straight and stepped back. waiting for him to pull away his butt from the couch.

"what did i do?" mark confusingly asked. you furiously took the remote from him.

"out." you coldly said.

mark who's still puzzled stood up and get put of your house. was it the i love you?

it was the i love you.

you breathed out heavily and landed on your seat. you raked your fingers on your hair and shut your eyes. you touched your left chest.. you heart was beating so fucking crazy but t shouldn't be like that. he only loves you when he's in heat, you noticed that but your heart was beating so fast. you felt bad for yourself.

he's too perfect and that's the problem. he only want your body, that's another problem.

mark is very kind but he's not the right person for your beating fast heart.

✨if you want to be added in I’m Right For You Tag List, you can DM or Ask me so i can add you ✨

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Tag List: @cloudykeiji @jjikyuu @sunshinedhyuck @wassup-haeyadwae @erisxczenie @mrklyy (i can't tag you 😔)

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sorry for my delayed update this is only short because next update will upload 3 days from now. pls be patient like how patient mark is to you😔😂

[thran-duils]

Lost In Zero Gravity (P.6)

Title: Lost In Zero Gravity (Part Six) Summary:  Fem!Reader x Mob Boss!Tony Stark x Mob Boss!Steve Rogers.  Reader is a call girl who runs high end parties. She catches the attention of Tony Stark who invites her back to his room with his friend. She might have performed too well because she becomes their new favorite play toy and they don’t like to share. Words: 3,632 Warnings (for the fic in entirety): Smut, prostitution, infidelity, angst, domestic violence, stalking, possessive behavior Author’s Note: Drug use in this chapter specifically!

Part Five || Part Seven || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

“You did not handle that well,” Tony said irritated, adjusting his suit as he settled back in the seat in the back of the SUV as the driver took off.

“Sue me!” Steve snapped. “She was a bitch.”

“Yeah, well, you were impulsive.” Steve gave Tony a pissed off look. “Really, it’s not like you. That’s my schtick. What’s up? What’s wrong?”

Steve chewed on his cheeks looking out the window. Tony leaned forward to try to catch his gaze. “Hey. Talk to me.”

With some difficulty, Steve breathed, “Cecile lost $200k on a bet.”

“What?” Tony asked, unable to mask his shock.

“Yeah,” Steve said throwing his hands out. He shrugged, giving a wry laugh, “She just texted me. Right before we got here. Fucking stupid.” He shook his head angrily, punching his thigh. His voice shook with his anger, “This is why I told her to stay the fuck out of gambling.”

“Fuck,” Tony said under his breath, tapping his fingers on his leg.

“Yeah, ‘fuck’ is right! That’s not chump change! You know, maybe if she wasn’t drunk half the time, this shit wouldn’t happen!”

Tony hesitated for a few moments before clearing his throat. “As terrible as that news is – because fuck me, I know that’s gonna dive into my funds too – but how about next time you’re already on edge, maybe let me know so I can handle the situation? Especially one as delicate as that?”

“I don’t need a damn lecture, Tony—”

“No, no, you do!” Tony interjected. “Do you remember what you just did? Grabbing Y/N like you did? Has it completely slipped your mind what recently happened? I mean—”

Steve hit the door and shouted, “Goddamnit, Tony, I know!” Happy eyed the two of them through the rearview mirror, gauging the situation. Tony shut his mouth, his eyes piercing Steve across the seat. Taking a shaky breath, Steve dug his fists into his legs. Calmer now, he said, “I know. I know. I’ll… apologize. Do something to make up for it.”

“Don’t let your marriage shit leak into this,” Tony told him firmly. Steve clenched his jaw and Tony said, “I’m fucking serious.”

<><><>

Tony was true to his word. He came back in the evening around 9:45pm, calling out for you when he closed the door. You were lying down on the bed and threw the covers back. Coming down the hall, you straightened out your top, smelling some hot cooked food.

You walked into the open kitchen, seeing he was taking food out of a bag.

“You eat yet?” he asked, not looking at you yet as he started opening containers. Without missing a beat, he went on. “Dumb question. I know you didn’t. Unless you just filled up on apples. Terence and Daryl said you didn’t order any groceries or food delivery. So… I got us burgers. My favorite.”

He was keeping an eye on you, that was plain.

Noticing you still had not come closer and he looked up, popping a few fries into his mouth.

“I like nightgowns,” Tony commented, running his eyes over your outfit.

You hesitated for a moment, debating about going back to your bedroom and slamming the door. You had had enough of their attitudes for the day, but Tony gave you a quick, playful smirk. He was just teasing. You relaxed, coming up to the counter.

“I like shorts. They’re comfortable,” you retorted.

“Hmm. The biggest tug of war for women. Sexy or comfortable. Well, it is your place so you can do whatever you damn well please, right?” He winked at you and dug back into the bag. “Got you some champagne. Thought we could celebrate your new place.”

He shoved your burger and fries towards you and went to the fridge. “Shit. We forgot ketchup. Good thing I asked for some.” He returned back to the counter and pulled some ketchup packages out of the bag, tossing them on the counter. The champagne bottle was back in his hands.

“Thanks,” you said picking up a few fries, eating them.

“Of course. Don’t want you to starve. Also… sorry about Steve earlier,” he said, popping the top off the champagne. He swiftly brought it up to his mouth to catch the overflow. He caught you looking at him and he shrugged. “Just thought I would apologize for him since he’s not here to do it himself.”

“Hmm,” was all you said as he moved past you to grab glasses.

Tony placed two glasses on the counter, his shoulder brushing yours. He poured two half full glasses and slid one towards you. You picked it up and he smiled at you.

“To your new place.”

“My new place,” you returned.

Glasses clinked and the two of you took a long drink.

Tony dug into his burger, taking a large bite. He let out a pleasured moan.

“Looks like you enjoy burgers more than sex,” you commented, picking your own up and taking a bite.

“That could be argued,” Tony admitted.

The two of you ate quietly then, Tony refilling your champagne glasses in between. He was making far more progress than you. You began wrapping up your burger but stopped under his gaze.

He eyed your half-eaten burger and your shoulders slumped, admitting embarrassed, “I did eat a couple – a few, actually – apples.”

Tony let out a sharp laugh, “Wow, you really are that stubborn. I’m impressed. Want me to put this in a Tupperware for you?”

“Yeah, okay.”

He went to work to put it in the fridge for you. “Seriously, order some food. Fruit is good for you but damn, you need some sustenance.” He turned back around, and his eyes fell on the champagne bottle. He shook his head and said, “I’ll put that in the fridge too. You can have that later. I do gotta get back home.”

“So soon?” you asked, pouting. If they wanted to earn trust from you, you knew the easiest way to do that was being as available as possible. You knew how to speak to men like them. “You don’t want to relax before you go back home?” You pulled your shirt over your head, tossing it onto the counter, your breasts free.

“You’re trying to stall me,” Tony stated, pointing at you, finishing the last part of his burger. With a full mouth, he stated, “You’re going to get me in trouble.”

Rolling your eyes, you grabbed your top back off the counter. Tony was there in a second though, yanking it from your hand. His lips crashed into yours, his hands roaming freely. You laughed against his kiss, pulling away. He tried to snatch you back, but you danced away, going towards the couch.

He shook his head following you, “You are really being a tease. And I am really full. I don’t feel like a chase.”

“Well, I’m only going over here,” you said gesturing at the couch behind you. “All you have to do is sit.”

His smirk was salacious, coming over at his own accord. He enveloped you back to him by the couch, pressing you up against the back. It shifted a few inches and you laughed, “You need to be careful.”

“I could tell you the same thing trying to get me riled up like you are,” he growled. He forced the two of you to walk around the back and the arm. He flopped onto the couch, freeing his dick from his pants.

Coming to your knees, you took him in your mouth. Tony chortled and it strangled as you sunk to his base, your tongue swirling. His hand came up to hold you there, bucking further into your throat. You struggled to keep yourself from gagging, relaxing as much as you could as he used your throat. His head brushed the back of your mouth repeatedly and you opened for his silken length until you could not handle it.

You gasped for air when you came back up and locked eyes with him. He nodded fervently, encouraging you. You licked at his tip, making him buck slightly. Another lick before you slowly swallowed him back down halfway, coming back up. His hand came to cradle you behind your head, his fingers pressing in to encourage you to go faster. You obliged him, your hand moving to play with his balls. He groaned against the sensation, bucking towards you.

Pulling away suddenly, you drew a disappointed sigh from him. Your other hand came to play with your sex that was already wet and ready; you loved giving blow jobs.

“Still no protection?” you teased.

“Fuck it, come on up here,” Tony gestured with both hands impatiently.

His cock slipped inside you, your arms hooked around his shoulders. He groaned loudly, throwing his head back. As usual, he did not leave you wanting. His hand came down to play with your clit when he felt he was getting close. You left him space to work, and he thrusted deep.

“Come on, come on, baby,” he panted.

He came down first, twitching. You forced his hand to your clit as he tried to relax, and he groaned but obliged you now. It only took a few moments before you came tumbling down after him. His hand fell limply to his side.

“Thank you,” you breathed, your foreheads touching.

He laughed, his hands coming back up to grip your sides and pull you closer. He kissed the tip of your nose affectionately. When he patted your ass, you took the hint and crawled out of his lap, standing bare in front of him. He took you in, smiling in approval.

“Dinner and sex. I knew this apartment was a good idea,” He said, zipping his jeans back up. He got up from the couch, straightening his clothes out. His eyes ran over your body again and he smirked briefly. “You just seem to know when I need release.”

“It’s kind of my specialty,” you retorted playfully.

Tony chucked you under the chin and then said, apologizing again, “I really am sorry about Steve’s outburst earlier. He has shit going on at home that he didn’t care to share with the class. He’ll get over it. Promise, sweetheart.”

“Hopefully with a better attitude the next time he visits.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Tony agreed.

You stopped him before he went for the door.

You shrugged sheepishly and asked, “Can… I get a pet? To keep me company?”

Tony stared at you for a few moments before shrugging in return. “As long as it’s a cat. I like cats. And you need to tell me when because there’s probably some stupid pet deposit and pet rent. Gouging you for every penny they can.” He leaned in closer, his lips almost touching yours. “Do I have permission to leave yet? Or do you have any other sexy schemes up your sleeve?”

You pecked his lips and said quietly, “The cat was the icing on the cake.”

He pecked you back and said, “Good. I’ll see you soon.”

<><><>

The next morning, you got out of the shower, wiping yourself down with a towel. Your robe was waiting on the counter and you wrapped that around yourself when you were dry, hanging the towel back up on the back of the door.

You froze then, hearing someone walk into the apartment, the door closing. You listened intently.

“Y/N, it’s me,” you heard Steve call from down the hall.

Relaxing realizing it was not an intruder, you tied the robe before leaving the bathroom.

Coming into the living area, you saw he was placing a bag on the counter. You approached cautiously.

“What’s… is something wrong?” you asked. You only asked because it was 7:30am.

Steve shook his head moving towards you and you faltered, shrinking away from him slightly. He stopped, exhaling sharply. “No. Nothing is wrong,” he said tightly. “I brought you breakfast. Tony said you hadn’t ordered groceries yet. It’s waffles and eggs.”

He turned away from you, going towards the cupboard to grab a plate. He started serving you up a plate and you came up to the counter, watching him. He fetched you silverware and pushed the plate towards you before making himself up a plate. He looked like he had barely slept.

“Thank you,” you told him.

Before he even took a bite, he apologized, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to act like I did yesterday. I felt like shit about it afterward, not that that excuses it. But really. I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry. I… I didn’t mean to get physical. I don’t have an excuse for that. Especially knowing your past.”

You did not actually expect him to apologize for it; that was new. And he seemed sincere. You swallowed the waffle you were chewing slowly. You shrugged, “It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not but I appreciate you saying so,” Steve returned.

You took another bite and then asked, trying to extend an olive branch, “Wanna watch something while we eat?”

Steve gave a little laugh, “That’s… that’s actually what I came over here to do.” You furrowed your brow and he explained, “Just wanted a calm place to veg out and watch some TV. I thought here was better than other places right now. Choose something.”

“Fine,” you said, holding up one finger. “Broad City. It’s based in NYC and it’s about two girls in their twenties who just have crazy ass adventures. Or,” you emphasized, holding up two fingers. “What We Do In the Shadows. Also, NYC but it’s vampires. But it’s The Office style.”

“I just finished that,” Steve said.

“It’s a classic.”

“So I was told.”

“Did it live up to expectations?”

“Sure did.”

“So, do you want comedy one with two girls that’s super cringe but hilarious. Or four vampires – one is an energy vampire, not traditional – but it’s also cringe?”

Steve contemplated for a moment and said slowly, “The girls.”

“Of course you pervert,” you said, smirking, picking up your plate and moving towards the couch.

Steve followed you, sitting on the couch beside you as you pulled it up on Hulu.

You started him proper on the series premiere and the two of you ate, Steve going for a second plate. The man could eat. He was actually enjoying it and you made it through three episodes, plates long discarded on the coffee table, before he leaned back on the couch, looking tired.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, just didn’t sleep well. The food isn’t helping either.”

“That’s called a food coma.” He chuckled at that and you said, “I’m serious. I have it happen all the time.”

“I’m probably gonna pass out,” Steve admitted.

“I’ll be quiet,” you assured him.

He patted his lap, and you cocked an eyebrow. He beckoned you and said, “You can lay here with me and be quiet.”

You had had this happen before – it was rare, a man just wanting to cuddle with you. But you did as he requested, lying your head on his thigh. His arm laid across your chest, his fingers delicately playing with your side. The episode rolled on and at the change in episodes, you heard him softly snoring. You did not dare move. Truth be told, you had not slept well either and you ended up dozing off too.

<><><>

You awoke to the jangling of keys. Groggily, you sat up, your movement stirring Steve from his slumber. You blinked, seeing Tony walking into the apartment, kicking the door closed behind him. He was carrying grocery bags and he stopped for a moment, eyeing the pair of you, before he went to the island, putting the bags up on it.

“Taking a nap already? It’s only noon. Which means lunch time. Good to see you have actual food here,” Tony commented sarcastically, gesturing the bags he brought. He began putting things away in the fridge and cupboards.

You stretched, saying, “I just need someone to cook it for me. I’m tired right now.”

“You’re barking up the wrong tree. I’ve tried to cook food for the missus, and she’s blacklisted me,” Tony responded, much to your amusement. “How about we order French? That’ll be safer. I’ve been craving escargot.”

“Ew?” you said, lying back down on Steve’s lap, and Steve nodded in agreement.

“Oh fuck off, you both like clams,” Tony called over his shoulder.

“Clams are not the same as snails,” you pointed out.

“They’re just land clams.”

Steve and you locked gazes, the two of you frowning at that statement.

“Shit, he’s right,” Steve admitted.

“You’re goddamn right that I’m right. Just because the two of you are uncultured swine,” Tony said, coming around the couch and gesturing for you to lift your legs. You did as he asked and he sat down, pulling your legs back over his lap, his cell phone in hand.

“Is there linguine at this escargot place? Because I’ll take that,” you offered. “Shrimp. Specifically.”

“That’s Italian, Y/N,” Tony replied, scrolling through his phone.

“Then can we get Italian?”

Tony shot you a look but smirked quickly after. “You got it,” Tony stated, his thumb pressing on something on his phone. He was ordering real time.

“Breadsticks…?” you ventured.

Steve nodded, “Yeah, those too. And I’ll take spaghetti and meatballs.”

“You’re just… boring,” Tony muttered but he went to work anyway to order the food.

You stretched out your limbs and rolled back onto your side to grab the controller for the console. You pressed play on the show again, cuddling up amongst them, anticipating the food. It was weird for sure, relaxing like this between them. But they had got you here in the first place and all you could do was follow their lead. It felt intimate though.

<><><>

Tony left midafternoon after the food had settled, claiming that he had taken a long enough lunch break, leaving you and Steve again.

You walked back from the bathroom, finding Steve standing next to the window and the unmistakable smell of weed emanating from where he was. He heard you walking up and turned back. He saw you staring at the lit joint in his hand and he shrugged sheepishly.

“I don’t have anything to do today,” Steve responded, taking a puff off the joint.

“Isn’t there a no smoking policy?” you inquired, coming closer. “And can’t you not get drunk?”

“The window’s open,” he said gesturing at the open window. You smirked and he shrugged, holding it out to you. “You want a hit? And alcohol acts different in the system, dove. THC definitely does the trick for me.”

You closed the distance to him, taking it from him and wrapped your lips around it sensually, taking a long drag. You held it in before exhaling slowly.

“Professional,” Steve smiled.

“In a lot of different things I suppose.”

You held it back out to him, your other hand came down, running down his chest, caressing.

“You seem on edge,” you whispered.

He smirked, taking the joint from you. “That’s what the weed is for.”

“You sure I can’t help?”

His eyes flashed at the insinuation, taking another long drag. He exhaled his smoke out the window in rings. He held it back to you and you took another hit. He looked around and you followed his gaze. “Shit,” he muttered. “Wanted to save half for later. Didn’t think that through without an ash tray.”

You left him to finish it, going to grab a glass bowl out of your cupboard. You held it out to him, and he rose his brows. You shrugged, “What? I can put it through the dishwasher.”

“I suppose,” he admitted, coming over and gently putting it out. You placed the bowl on the counter as he said, “But, yeah. You can help since you mentioned it.”

Steve picked you up, your legs wrapping around his hips. You loved how strong he was, that was a perk. His kisses were ravaging, sucking earnestly at your jawline, neck, and lips as he carried you down the hall to your bedroom. He tossed you back on the bed and crawled on after you. He was earnest, his touch desperate. He was kissing every part of your body that he could.

The two of you undressed each other, tousling around on your comforter. Steve entered you with ease, the two of you lying on your sides. He nipped at your earlobe as he drove himself up into you, his hand caressing and squeezing at your chest.

You ended up on your knees, his hand pressing at the small of your back. You arched your back for him, letting him dive deeper.

“Just like that Cecile,” he grunted, his thrusts becoming shallower as he got close to release.

That drug you from your high immediately.

Who the fuck was Cecile?

You lost the rhythm and Steve came without you, his hands gripping you tightly.

He rolled off of you, breathing heavily. It did not seem to register with him what he had done. It was not the first time a man had called you by a different name mid-sex, but Steve had never.

Pushing past the disappointment of not coming and the uncomfortableness you felt, you turned over and he drug you to his side, holding you there as he steadied his breathing. Your hand laid on his chest, rising and falling with his breath.

“That was good, dove,” he exhaled, looking relaxed. His eyes were definitely red, high as a kite. “I think I might actually get some good sleep.”

“That’s good,” you said softly, tracing slow circles on his chest. You hoped you would fall asleep quickly too to avoid overthinking about what had just happened.

~~~

Forever tags: @coconutqueen21 @undecidedsworld

Fic tags: @icant-hangout-imdrumming @oceaniamaddness @multifandom-superlover @imsonick @holl2712 @here4thefanfics

[partybees]

pulchritudinous | midori takamine x gender neautral! reader

because this boy deserves so much appreciation 😩

to put it simply, you are quite the extravagant photographer. always making sure every project of yours turns out to be a masterpiece and giving your fans a spectacular delivery. from posters, to photo cards. from being hired to take pictures of a baby shower or wedding, you can do it all. hence, you take your job very seriously. pleasing your clients is a wonderful feeling but so is being proud of yourself.

“what will it be this time, i wonder?” you ponder to your photography assistant. the younger girl walking ahead of you, hastily going through the documents of your next project. “it’ll be an idol group that calls themselves ryuseitai. a bunch of heroes they claim to be.” she responded. you clapped your hands. a rush wave of giddiness filled you up. “that’s right! that’s right!”

as a fan of idols, (ryuseitai especially) you are delighted to the point where there are stars in your eyes. in fact, you’re charmed by midori takamine out of the bunch. his effort into being an idol catches your eyes. that goes without saying, his pure embarrassment that television catches every once in a while is endearing to you.

“i’ll be checking up on them now. bring over their presents!”

“yes, of course!” thus, your assistance jogged off. you hummed contentedly as you made your way to the dressing room. ID hanging from your neck and work outfit bringing out your most beautiful features.

“i’m here!” you sang as you knocked on the dressing room in your favorite ryuseitai song rhythm. you heard a familiar shriek in the room and that made you enter nonchalantly. perhaps it was the impulse you felt because the shriek had came from your favorite hero.

the dressing room had no one but midori. he seemed a bit frightened, sitting alone in one of the chairs and in front of the large enormous vanity.

“ah! midori takamine!...it’s just you right now?”

“uh ....y-yeah, the others said they wanted to check out the cafeteria of this agency.” he replied. “you must be y/n l/n...i heard so much about you.”

you paused. he had already been dressed up. face with light makeup, ivory clothes complimented him and his precious eyes if somebody were to ask you. oh, he looks even handsomer in person. “uhm.” you gulp. nobody knew why, but you would always like those that aren’t...so eccentric like you. some even kept on telling you that you should be with people of your own kind, whatever that meant.

“...l-l/n?!...what’s wrong..?!” midori kept backing away his upper body as you had gradually leaned in closer and closer to take in his breathtaking features. “my, oh my. you are....” you whispered before standing back up straight and smiling elatedly. “so beautiful! i can’t wake to work with you!”

“huh?...thank you very much?” midori couldn’t respond any other way. to be complimented by a well-known photographer, how exactly is he supposed to react? apart from the rising blush he has on his face, midori could only muster a small smile.

“excuse me. y/n, are you in here?” your assistant’s voice made you perk up all excitedly. “yes! come in, come in!” you opened the door only for her but for the other two staff members following behind her. midori’s eyebrows rose. they’re totally acting like they own this place or something: he thought. he hummed upon seeing five gift boxes being placed on a nearby table.

“i’m sure you already heard of this from the rumors but, my boss has a habit of giving gifts for their clients.” your assistant explained plainly. she smiled reassuringly at midori, who seemed a bit confused. “they have done research on you the most, takamine.” her words made him feel flattered. he had thought that y/n would be more interested in his boisterous leader, or the true oddball of the bunch, kanata but instead, you’re telling him he catches your eye the most? impossible.

“okayyy. out you go. thank you for the help! appreciate it lots!” you passive aggressively told your assistant and the staff members, lightly shooing them off. all things considered, it’d be so embarrassing for midori to figure out the fact you’re intrigued in him. your assistant chuckled. “alright. we’re going. this way, you two.” she led the staff members down the hallway. you close the door hastily.

“okay, why don’t you try opening your gift? i’d love to see your reaction.” you suggest. since he is the only one here, you’d like to take advantage of the situation. the more you can know about midori, after all. “you didn’t have buy us gifts.” he scratched his cheek sheepishly. his breath hitched when you slammed your hands on the table that held the presents.

“nonsense. this is my way of showing my adoration for you boys. you see, i’m a huge fan of ryuseitai just like my little cousin. he was actually the one who introduced me to your music one late night.” you shortly elucidated. proudly, in fact. midori didn’t feel like he was cut out to deal with this type of person. “re-really? i didn’t see that coming but thank-” “of course! now, open up! here, this one is yours.” you slid the fern box to him. he sighed, a little annoyed that you cut him off before he could thank you.

although, when he opened the box. his eyes lit up and his mouth opened into a large grin. “oh wow!” he picked up the plushie of what seemed to be a hybrid between a cat, dog or maybe a raccoon. whatever it was, he already has an attachment to it. he lifted it up into the air to admire the gamboge zigzag patterns and the magenta fabric. it’s cute doe eyes and rosy cheeks are adorable features to it, he didn’t think he has seen anything like this before.

“thank you so much! i’ll treasure this!”

y/n couldn’t see his smile too well. the doll was in the way. “do you like it?” they asked patiently.

“like it? no, no, no!” midori shook his head fervently. “i love it! it’s a pleasure to be working with you, y/n!” he smiled. this smile was more jovial than the others. it felt like your brain stopped working by now.

...

“...right! yes!” you checked your watch, cheeks dusted in a taffy shade. midori is too giddy to have notice as you step back to the door of the dressing room. “well, i- i hope the others love their gifts just as much as you do!” you giggle. midori looked your way with a small frown, holding his new adorable possession close to him. “what? leaving already?”

it was like an arrow of warmth shoot right through your heart when he said that. you giggle nervously once more. “yep, i have to check on the equipment and get my camera ready so excuse me. bye bye, midori!” thats when you ran out the room and shut the door close. midori smiled shyly and looked down at his plushie. perhaps meeting you like this wasn’t so bad as the rumors interpret you to be. in fact, he would like to run into you like this in the future of destiny wants. you started to look cute in his eyes right about now.

[daveeddiggsit]

No Return

Note: so this is not a new fic. i actually posted it back in 2017 (but deleted all my smut from this blog about a year afterwards haha we love being impulsive). but i’m over myself now, so i’m reposting! a lot of you have been asking about it, so... here you go. posted for all of y’all to enjoy again.

Word Count: 4.7k

Pairing: Daveed Diggs x Reader

Warnings: smut. cursing.

Summary: Diggs loses a bet which results in him owing you a lap dance.

Parties at Rafa’s place were always the best; the drinks were great, the music was amazing, the atmosphere was never dull, but the best part about them were the incredible people that made up each one; you were never bored. There was always something to do whether you were talking to people, dancing, playing drinking games, or just drinking in general. And that’s why whenever you were told that there was going to be a party at Rafael Casal’s apartment, you never turned it down...even if you ended up showing up late.

“Well, look at who finally decided to show up.” You heard a familiar voice say as you walked through the door to Rafa’s place. Daveed grinned widely at you before he slid an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close to him as you walked deeper into the apartment. “My favorite!”

Daveed was one of your closest friends and if you were being honest, it would have been a lie if you said you didn’t want him to become something more than that. The two of you often flirted and were constantly together (these occurrences happened so often that there were many times people believed you were dating), but neither of you had made a real move. You knew how you felt toward him, and he was giving you signs that he felt the same way, but no true actions were made by either party. So that’s why it stayed the way it was between you two: just close friends who often flirted with each other.

“Aw, I’m your favorite?” You asked, raising your voice so he could hear you over the loud music that was pumping through Rafa’s speakers.

“Uh, yeah,” he stated as if it was obvious, “but don’t tell anyone else. It’s a secret between you and me.” He whispered in your ear as you entered the kitchen.

Yeah, he had definitely downed a few drinks before you got here.

“Diggs, I’m pretty sure everyone heard you when you shouted it.” You laughed as you plucked the cup half-full of alcohol from his grasp, draining it of its contents. He pouted at you once you handed him back an empty cup.

“Y/N, hey! It’s been forever since I’ve seen you!” Adrienne said from beside Rafa who was pouring out a few drinks.

“Hey!” You pulled away from Daveed’s grasp to give her a hug. She’d been away in Canada for the last few weeks shooting for a new project she was working on. “I’ve missed you! Why’d you have to leave me alone to deal with these boys for so long?”

Adrienne laughed while Rafael furrowed his eyebrows.

“Oh, so you didn’t miss me? I see how it is, Y/N, I see how it is.” He feigned hurt, before pushing a couple of newly filled cups towards you and Daveed.

You rolled your eyes at him. “We had lunch a few days ago, Cash, it hasn’t been that long since I’ve seen you.”

“But so much has changed since then.”

You chuckled before taking a sip. “Like what? Did you finally finish that song you’ve been working on?”

“No.” Rafael replied before he smiled at Adrienne beside him. “Unlike Diggs, I am no longer a single and lonely Bay Boy.”

Daveed’s eyebrows furrowed as he cocked his head. “Yo, who said I was lone—?”

“You guys are finally together? Oh my god, congrats!” You cut in with widened eyes.

They both grinned at each other before Rafa leaned down to kiss her forehead.

“Aww,” you gushed, “you two are couple goals already.”

A few seconds passed before you felt Daveed’s arm drape around your shoulders again.

“You know, we could be couple goals too.” He said, looking down at you with a smirk.

You rolled your eyes, pushing him away. “Ha, you wish, Diggs.”

You laughed it off because you knew he was too tipsy to be serious. He always flirted with you like this, but why did this time feel so different?

A few drinks later, you were beginning to feel the familiar light-hearted, buzzing feeling course throughout your body, giving you a boost of energy. You had drifted away from Daveed and Rafa to roam through the house and catch up with people you hadn’t seen since your Hamilton days. You were talking with Adrienne and Ari when you heard your name being called from behind you.

“Aye, Y/L/N!”

You turned your head to see Daveed standing next to a table a few feet away. 

“Diggs!” You responded in the same playful tone.

He grinned at you before waving you over. “Come play Flip Cup with me.”

“Really?” You quirked an eyebrow. “You lose every time you play against me, D.”

“I’m feeling confident today. I’ve been practicing.”

You tried not to laugh as you rose from your seat and approached him. “Practicing?”

“Bruh,” Rafa snickered at his friend from the other end of the table. “You played a few games before this and won two in a row. That ain’t practicing.”

You let a smug grin show up on your face as you glanced back up at your best friend. “Daveed, I am the queen of Flip Cup, okay? You can’t beat me. Nobody ever has, and nobody ever will. That’s a fact.”

“I’m pretty sure I can beat you today, Y/N.” He said bluntly. Wow, he was forward when he was drunk. “I have a good feeling about this.”

“Ha,” you huffed out a laugh, “wanna bet?"

“What do you propose, oh mighty Queen of Flip Cup?”

You thought for a second. What was something you knew would make him think twice about challenging you? Something that would make him step down from this newfound cockiness he embodied.

When the idea formed in your head, you sent him a sly grin. “Winner gets a lap dance from the loser.”

You distinctly remembered an earlier conversation with him where he stated that he couldn’t dance. You knew it was untrue due to the times you’d seen him dance at the club or during some of the numbers in Hamilton, but you also knew that the wager wasn’t something he’d necessarily jump on (despite the confidence boost the alcohol had supplied him).

Rafa led the mini crowd that had formed around you in a chorus of “ooo”s.

“Deal.”

You looked up at Daveed in surprise. You hadn’t expected him to agree to the terms so easily.

“Diggs, that means if you lose— sorry, when you lose, you have to give me a lap dance.”

“I know.” He said seriously.

“And you’re good with that?”

“If it happens, which it won’t because I’m gonna win, then yes.” He stated, his mouth forming into a confident smile. “I’m good with that.”

Fine, he wanted a challenge? You were going to give him one.

“Alright, then.” You said, narrowing your eyes at him. “Game on."

⋆﹥━━━━━━━   ♛   ━━━━━━━﹤⋆

Daveed lost. Badly.

So badly, in fact, that you actually felt bad for him. So you tweaked it so it was the best out of five games...and even then, he still lost.

Oh well, it’s not like you didn’t warn him.

When the third game ended and Daveed realized his defeat, he threw his head back and groaned.

“Aww, don’t be such a sore loser. You lost fair and square, Diggs. ” You teased with a smile, wrapping your arms around his torso to hug him from behind. “I warned you. I told you I was the queen of Flip Cup, but you didn’t listen.”

“Those cups were rigged, Y/N.” He stated, turning around in your grasp so he could hug you back.

You laughed, rolling your eyes. “Say whatever you want to make yourself feel better. Nothing’s gonna change the fact that you owe me a lap dance.”

He was quiet for a moment before he murmured something. “You know I can’t dance, right?”

“First of all, yes you can. And secondly, lap dances are different, Diggs.”

“No, they’re not.”

“Yes they are. And if you don’t think they’re different, you dance at parties all the fucking time. You should be able to handle an easy lap dance.”

He lifted his head back up from your shoulder to look down at you. “But Y/N...”

You let out a laugh before you patted his cheek lightly. “You dug yourself into this hole, loser. Guess you’re just gonna have to figure it out because you’re not getting out of this one.”

⋆﹥━━━━━━━   ♛   ━━━━━━━﹤⋆

The next day you woke up to someone knocking on your door. In sweats and an old t-shirt, you made your way over to unlock it, squinting your eyes to adjust to the bright light. The slight hangover you had wasn’t really helping you get out of your groggy state.

“Daveed?” You asked, realizing who your visitor was once your vision adjusted. “What are you doing here so early?”

He was dressed in a yellow Oaklandish tank top that showed off his toned arms/shoulders and dark blue jeans with a brown belt buckled just enough to let them sit loosely on his hips. You also noticed that he decided to rock his glasses today.

You snapped your eyes up to his and away from his figure that left you breathless. You totally had not just checked him out.

“If your definition of early is 2 o’clock in the afternoon, I think you may need to reevaluate some things and consider fixing that sleep schedule of yours.” He replied with his lips turning up into an amused grin.

“Shut up, I had a late night last night.” You mumbled, turning around to walk away, leaving the door open so he could let himself into your apartment. “And you did too. I’m surprised you’re not asleep right now.” You glanced back at him to see him shrug.

“I had to meet Bill and Jon at the studio at 10. I’ve been up since, like, 9:30.”

“Damn, Diggs, you’re gonna have to teach me your ways.”

“Caffeine.” He chuckled, putting on his signature grin. “It works miracles.”

You returned the smile, before sending him a curious look. “So, why are you here? Not that I mind or anything, it’s good to see you, but you haven’t been over in like a month and a half.”

“Exactly! It’s been awhile since we’ve hung out alone, so I thought it’d be dope if we chilled and watched movies or something.” He replied before he went to ramble on. “I mean— only if you want to. If you’re really tired, I can leave so you can get some more sl—”

“No, no, it’s fine! That sounds great.” You cut him off and placed a hand on one of his toned arms to reassure him. 

“You sure?”

“Yeah!” You responded. “Just let me take a quick shower and we can start in like 20ish minutes.”

“A 20 minute shower counts as a quick shower?” He questioned with a teasing look.

“Yes,” you said, “or would you rather it be 45ish minutes?”

“20ish minutes is good. Have fun with your quick shower. Though, I think it would be more fun if I joined.” A tiny but noticeable smirk made its way onto Daveed’s face.

You laughed when he sent you a playful wink, dropping your hand from his arm to walk towards your room. “You wish, Daveed Diggs.”

“You have no idea.” He mumbled under his breath (inaudible to your ears) before he let his eyes follow your retreating figure.

“Maybe you could set up the movie in the meantime? It’s your turn to choose. The remote’s on the coffee table and you know where the popcorn and shit is in the kitchen. I’ll be out soon. If you need anything, yell.” You said before closing the door to your room.

Daveed sent a thumbs up in your direction even though he knew you couldn’t see it before he made his way to your living room.

Little did you know, Daveed had something else planned.

⋆﹥━━━━━━━   ♛   ━━━━━━━﹤⋆

When you emerged from your shower, you quickly dried yourself and combed through your now damp hair. After that, you exited your room and entered your living room to see that it was completely dark. Confused, you surveyed the room to look for your best friend, but there was no sign of him at all.

Did he leave? If he did, he didn’t text you or anything to let you know.

“D?” You called out, walking further into the room.

With each step you took, the more you realized how this seemed like a scene from a horror film. You weren’t a fan of them, but a few months back Daveed and Rafael had pretty much forced you to have a scary movie marathon with them.

“Daveed Diggs, I swear to God. If you’re trying to scare me right now, I will—”

You squeaked when a pair of arms snaked their way around your waist from behind. Daveed’s voice had come seemingly from out of nowhere. “You’ll what?”

“Kick your ass.” You glared at him, quickly turning around to push him away. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”

He laughed, smiling brightly. “I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“No, you’re not.” You grumbled, moving to sit on your couch. Daveed followed you.

“You right. It was so worth it.” He grinned at you, causing you to roll your eyes at him. You tried to stay mad at him, but it was damn near impossible when he was looking at you like that.

“We’re not friends anymore.” You stated, crossing your arms.

“What, why?” He asked, his grin dropping into a pout.

“You were mean to me, Diggs! How dare you scare me in my own home!” You were laughing internally.

“Okay, fine. I’m sorry for real this time. What can I do to make it up to you?”

When he asked, you contemplated it for a few moments before you looked up at him with a smirk.

“What?” He asked.

“Well, you still owe me that lap dance…”

He groaned, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back on the couch. “I thought you forgot about that.”

“Nope.” You said, your smirk forming into a smug grin. You had the upper hand now. “How could I forget you losing a bet against me, resulting in a lap dance from the great Daveed Diggs himself?”

After a couple of seconds, he sighed, opening his eyes and tilting his face towards you. “If I do this now, will I win back your friendship?”

“I’ll think about it.” You said, causing him to give you a deadpanned look. You laughed before you spoke again. “Yeah, I guess we could be friends again. But it has to be good.”

Daveed sighed again before he straightened himself up. “I don’t even know how to give a good lap dance, Y/N.”

“Improvise. C’mon, D, you’re great at improv. Treat it like you treat a freestyle. Just go with the flow.” You smiled widely at him.

“Fine.” He said, getting up from his spot next to you. “But I’m only pulling through with this because I like you.”

“Aww, you like me?” You asked teasingly to mask the actual feeling that was coursing through you. You continued to grin at him as he pulled out his phone to scroll through his music library. When he finally settled on a song by The Weeknd, he turned to you once he pressed play.

“Do I start now?”

“Yes,” you laughed. “C’mon, you know how a lap dance works. You’re not a novice when it comes to these things, stop fucking around.”

You could see him smile and rub his arm before he looked away for a second. When he started to slowly sway to the beat of the song, it was extremely hard for you to stifle your laugh. Your best friend was about to give you a lap dance and you could not take him seriously.

He continued to dance to the beat for a bit as he stared you down with a smirk. He was doing this shit on purpose. He was joking around until you couldn’t contain your laughter any longer.

“Diggs, I can’t take you seriously like this. I can—” You wheezed. “I just can’t.”

Your laughter and the slow, sexy beats of the music were the only audible things in your apartment until Daveed spoke again. 

“Are you ready for me, Y/N?” His smooth, low voice washed over you.

You let out yet another giggle. “Don’t make it sound so sexual.”

“It's supposed to sound sexual, Y/N, it’s a fucking lap dance.” He chuckled, now standing directly in front of you.

“Alright, show me what you got, Bay Boy.”

You continued to laugh at him as you watched him, but the moment he straddled your lap, you stopped. His arms were on each side of your head, using the couch to steady himself over you as his hips began to slowly grind against you. That’s when the atmosphere in the room completely changed.

Your eyes widened slightly when you saw him bite his bottom lip in concentration. When you envisioned Daveed giving you a lap dance the night prior, you didn’t think it would be like this...it was flustering you more than you thought it would. Before you knew it, you were struggling to control your movements. Your fists were clenching and unclenching as you so desperately tried to keep them anchored to your sides.

As if he had read your mind, Daveed murmured, “You can touch me, Y/N. Don’t be afraid.”

If you weren’t turned on before, you definitely were now. His gravelly voice paired with his hot breath right next to your ear caused you to shiver, making goosebumps appear across your entire body.

Then, you finally let your hands wander. They traveled up his chest to rest on his shoulders, then back down again to move under the hem of his tank top so you could feel his bare and strong torso. Sure it was a bold move, but the more and more Daveed grinded on you, the less and less you cared. When his tank top rode up to the point where you could see all of his abs, he paused to stand up and quickly get rid of the article of clothing before he came back to straddle you again. 

Your heart was beating wildly in your chest as you looked up at your best friend. He looked undeniably attractive when he was on top of you shirtless and with his glasses on. Every feeling you had ever felt for him came crashing down on you at that moment and that’s when you just about lost your self-control. Part of your brain was screaming at you, saying that you were about to cross a line that you could never cross again...but at the same time, all of your cares had disappeared.

You used your newfound courage to cup Daveed’s face in both of your hands and pull him into a deep kiss. He gasped softly, surprised at the sudden contact, but quickly eased into it. 

You had just passed the point of no return.

You didn’t know what to expect when you decided to kiss him, but it was better than you could have imagined. When you pulled back, his mouth was slightly dropped in awe and one of the sides slowly twitched up into a soft smile. (It was kind of adorable.)

“Daveed, I like you.” You blurted, short of breath.

His face broke out into a full grin. “I like you too, Y/N.” 

“No,” you shook your head, moving your hands from his cheeks down to his shoulders. “I mean like— like like you.”

“I know,” he chuckled. “I mean, I figured given what just happened a few seconds ago. Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

You shrugged, breaking eye contact with him. You subconsciously traced one of your thumbs across his collarbone. “I was afraid of rejection, I guess.”

“Are you serious?”

“What?” You asked, sounding offended.

Daveed caught your gaze again, pushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. “Y/N, I’ve had like the biggest fuckin’ crush on you since Ari introduced us.”

“Wait, really?”

“Mhm,” he hummed. “I’m actually really surprised you didn’t notice.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about your crush earlier, Diggs?” You voiced, giving him a pointed look.

He gave you a shy smile when he moved off of you to sit beside you, still facing you. “Same reason as you.”

“You know what? I’m not even mad about not knowing sooner.” You said. “I’m glad we found out like this.”

“You’re just happy I gave you a lap dance with my amazing skills.” He teased with a laugh of his own.

You laughed again, and pushed at his chest so he could lay on his back and let you crawl on top of him to straddle his waist. “Not gonna lie, I didn’t think you had it in you, Diggs.”

His jaw dropped completely as he looked up at you. “But you said that I could do a lap dance when even I said I couldn’t!”

“That’s true, but to be fair, I never said you couldn’t do a lap dance. I just didn’t think you’d do as well as you did.”

Your response brought yet another smile to his face as you leaned closer to him. “I’mma take that as a compliment.” He said softly.

At this point, the song Daveed had chosen had ended a while ago and the lap dance was long over.

“Good.” You responded before you kissed him again.

This one was different from the first. It started off soft, but quickly turned passionate and heated. As your mouths moved against each other, Daveed’s hands moved from your hips up to the hem of your shirt, his fingertips grazing your bare sides, leaving goosebumps in their wake. The only word you could use to describe this feeling was just complete bliss.

When you reached down to Daveed’s belt buckle, he shivered, causing you to smile against his lips.

Then he pulled away, panting. “Y/N…” he breathed. “Are you sure about this? You don’t have to— fuck.” He cursed as you pulled back completely to unbuckle his pants. “I don’t wanna push y—” 

“Daveed,” You said, before pausing quickly to put a hand on his scruff, tenderly moving your thumb to caress his cheek. “I’m absolutely sure about this. Now please, shut the hell up so I can blow you.”

You smirked when you saw his eyes widen and when you crawled off of him to go in between his legs, you heard a quiet, “Okay.”

Wasting no more time, you removed his jeans and boxers to free his erection. You could see Daveed’s chest begin to rise and fall quicker when you took his length into your hand and pressed a kiss to the tip of it.

“Oh, shiiit.” He drawled softly when your mouth wrapped around him, slowly sucking your way down as far as you could. As you began to bob your head up and down, Daveed’s breathing increased with each suck and occasional flick of your tongue.

Now, he was fully panting. He lifted his head up to look down at you, causing him to groan. After a minute or two, he brought a hand down to move some strands of hair out of your face.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he babbled, “I...I shouldn’t...oh God, I shouldn’t be this fucking close.”

You slowly pulled off of him and he brought you back up to kiss him again.

“You,” Daveed breathed against your lips, “are way too fucking good at that.”

You grinned.

“And,” he continued, “this clothing situation is a bit unbalanced, don’t you think?” 

His thumbs grazed the waistband of your sweatpants. When you nodded, you pulled them down along with your underwear. You moved off of him to take them off completely and remove your shirt and bra, leaving you just as bare as he was.

You climbed back on top of him, straddling his washboard abs, when he ushered you to move up. You obeyed, moving forward an inch or two, but Daveed shook his head and grabbed your thighs, moving you himself.

“Daveed, what are you doing?”

“Returning the favor.” He said simply, bringing you over to his face.

“Oh,” you breathed when you felt his tongue lightly touch your clit.

The man’s mouth worked miracles from between your thighs. Daveed kept you still above his skilled tongue, occasionally giving your ass a squeeze.

“D-Daveed,” you gasped, your mouth forming a perfect ‘O’ as his tongue lightly circled your clit before he brought fully into his mouth to suck gently.

This was the best head you’d gotten...well ever, actually. He wanted you to feel the best you’d ever felt and he definitely achieved that.

Before you knew it, you were reaching your high, climaxing as you shouted Daveed’s name, not caring how loud it echoed throughout your apartment. When you crawled back down Daveed’s body, the two of you shared a sloppy kiss as you both breathed heavily.

Although you just came, you weren’t completely satisfied. You still wanted him... needed to feel him inside you.

You moved to position yourself above his cock, but he made you pause before you could do so.

“Y/N, stop,” Daveed panted. “Condom.”

“Don’t need it.” You replied quickly. “I’m on the pill.”

“Oh, fuck yes.” He replied, releasing you so you could resume what you were about to do.

You breathed out a laugh before you slowly sank down onto his length, making both you and him release a groan. 

“You are so fucking gorgeous,” he gasped. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this.”

Your fingers ghosted along his stubble-ridden jaw. “I think I have an idea.”

When you adjusted to his size, you began to bounce and he helped you, meeting each of your thrusts as he guided your hips onto him.

Your lips met Daveed’s yet again and you captured every moan that fell from his mouth, he did the same for you. As your pace quickened, so did each grunt, pant, and moan. You felt your pussy begin to clench again like it had when you came before.

“I’m gonna come,” Daveed said quickly against your mouth.

“Fuck.” You groaned. “Me too, D.”

“Come for me, sweetheart.” He breathed, bringing a hand up from your hip to cup your cheek. “You can do it.”

And you did.

Your walls clenched around him and you gasped, letting your orgasm wash over you in waves. Daveed came shortly after you, and continued to thrust, riding the both of you through your highs.

As you came down and pulled yourself off him, you collapsed, exhausted, halfway leaning on him and halfway laying on your couch. You moved a hand up to rest on his chest again, closing your eyes in bliss as you relaxed against him.

After a minute or two of silence, Daveed broke it.

“Wait, so...does this mean we’re friends again?” 

You looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. He was still on that? Wow, what a dork. “After this? Everything that just happened?” You asked bewildered. “God, I hope not.”

“Fine,” he said letting his signature bright smile show up on his face, still breathing heavily. “More than friends?”

Your heart fluttered in your chest and you grinned widely back at him. You leaned up to softly kiss his jaw before you gave him your answer.

“Way more than just friends, D.”

[kinktae]

bitchin’ || pt. 7 (M)

↳ PART OF MY REWIND SERIES

The 80s were a time of choices. Which perm was right for you? What color neon would you wear next? None of these choices, however, were more questionable than a certain deal you made with Jeon Jungkook.

pairing: fratboy!jungkook x reader

word count: 3.4k

genre: 1980s au, eventual smut, e2l

warnings: sorry this chapter is so short :(

A/N: This fic was inspired by To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. Thank you to @junqkook for letting me use her likeness!

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10

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PART SEVEN

Your fingers wrapped around the metal handle, prying open the door of your dorm.

Unsurprisingly, you were met with a mop of dark hair and a full set of white teeth, Jungkook's smile wide and blinding. You had figured the incessant knocking was his doing.

"Yes?"

Your tone was dry, clueing Jungkook in that despite the 24 hours that had passed since the day of your event, you were still, in fact, pissed at him.

Moving a hand from behind his back, he presented you with a bouquet of yellow flowers, jutting them your way. Your eyes fell onto the flowers with indifference, clearly not impressed.

"These are for you." He enthused.

"Is this your way of apologizing?"

Jungkook sighed, flowers falling to his side, “Change into something nice, we’re going out.”

You quirked a brow at him.

“Uh, or don’t! What you’re wearing right now is cool too! Totally up to you.” He backtracked quickly.

You were in polka-dotted pajama pants, a plain white t-shirt on your upper body– his shirt actually. You had stolen it from him some time ago, he was just good-natured enough to pretend like he hadn't noticed.

Rolling your eyes, you snatched the bouquet out of his eyes, the faintest hint of a grin on your lips.

"Fine." You agreed, hand coming out to press back against his chest as he tried to walk into your dorm. "But you're waiting here."

Jungkook pouted as the door shut shortly after, feeling very much like a puppy who had been put in time out.

And just like a puppy, any grudge he felt towards his owner was forgotten the moment you came back out, his cheeks warm as you intertwined your hand with his, unable to hold a grudge against him either.

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"Is the blindfold really necessary?" Your voice wavered nervously, a scarf wrapped tightly around your head to block your vision. You had both of your hands gripped around Jungkook's arm as he attempted to guide you up a set of stairs.

"Yes, it'll ruin the surprise if you see where we're going."

"My ass is going to be ruined if I fall and bust it."

"And what a nice ass it is." Jungkook tutted sadly, causing you to snort.

"Make sure you're paying attention to where we're going." You scolded, slapping his bicep.

Jungkook rolled his eyes, "Relax, nerd, we're here."

Your steps were brought to a halt, the sound of a heavy door opening ringing out. You cocked your head as a breeze washed over you, the kind that didn’t feel like it came from air conditioning.

"Grant me sight, oh powerful one." You joked as Jungkook began to untie your blindfold.

You squinted harshly as light flooded your eyes, blinking away spots the blurriness as you took in your surroundings.

"Where are we?" You marveled.

"The multimedia building rooftop." He informed you as you stepped out of the doorway, admiring the garden that was spread across the entire space. A makeshift greenhouse, you deduced. "It's where the Botany Club and Gardening Club meet and work."

You were absolutely enthralled, you hadn't the slightest clue that a place like this was sitting hidden on your campus. And as beautiful as it was up here, it was the woven picnic basket sitting by a bush of familiar-looking yellow flowers that caught your attention. Immediately, you recognized them as being the flowers Jungkook had gifted you with back at your dorm. You grinned.

Accompanying the basket was a pile of colorful blankets laid out of the concrete floor, along with pillows and another bouquet of yellow flowers, this time set up nicely in a glass vase.

"You know I don't cook, but, uh, I do know how to make a mean PB&J sandwich so..." Jungkook laughed nervously, gesturing towards the picnic he had set up.

A strange feeling fluttered in your stomach, and you brought up a hand to press up against it reflexively. He had arranged all of this... for you?

"Oh, wow." Was your response, the butterflies in your stomach hard to ignore.

Your reaction was hard to decipher and it made Jungkook incredibly anxious. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans, "Well, let's go, nerd."

You followed Jungkook over to the picnic scene, sliding off your shoes before stepping onto the blanketed spot, flopping down with an excited giggle. You had been toying with the tassels of one of the pillows near you when Jungkook pulled out a small portable radio for the basket, a word of approval leaving your lips. He really did think of everything, didn't he?

"How did you even find this place?" You marvel as he fiddled with the radio dial, flipping through stations until he found one he was content with.

"I went to a photography club meeting and they mentioned this place being a good spot for sunset shots."

You had taken note a little wooden popsicle stick poking up from the soil of the yellow flowers. Acacias, they were marked. Pulling your knees up to your chest, you considering his words.

"You went to a photography club meeting? Wait, are you–"

"I'm considering switching majors, yeah." He cut you off, leaning back away from the radio and taking a seat beside you.

"Not even!" You gaped.

"It's not that big of a deal." He shrugged nonchalantly. He was only changing his entire career path because you had told him you believed in him. No biggie, right?

"It's huge news, I mean, you're taking the initiative and pursuing your passion. I'm amped for you." You grinned to which Jungkook couldn't help but return, reaching into the picnic basket to pull out your sandwiches.

The two of you sat beside each other comfortably, washing your food down with sips from your respective juice boxes, which Jungkook had so endearingly provided. You hummed along to the radio as the sun slowly started its descent down the sky.

Suddenly, Jungkook cleared his throat, a clear sign that he was asking for your attention.

"So, you probably know why I brought you here."

You nodded.

"You're proposing, right?"

"Yeah, I– oh, shut up." He laughed, the serious mood shattering as you joined him.

“No, I just really wanted to apologize for the way I behaved at your event. I acted on impulse and wasn't thinking past my... raging man ego or whatever." Jungkook sighed, eyes meeting yours earnestly. You bit down on the inside of your cheek, eager to hear him out.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I would never want to do anything to hurt my best friend and I know how hard you worked on this event and— why are you looking at me like that?” He huffed, cutting himself off mid-apology.

“You just called me your best friend.” You beamed, cheeks round.

Jungkook felt himself redden, turning away from your admittedly adorable expression.

“Yeah. So?”

“That’s so cute.” You fawned. “And you did all this for me. You can be really sweet when you want to be, you know.”

Jungkook wasn’t used to this kind of doting affection being directed at him, much less coming from you of all people. He swatted away your hand that had reached out to pinch his cheek.

“Yeah, yeah, just zip it before I demote you back down to classroom acquaintance.”

You hummed contentedly, “I accept your apology. And for what it's worth, I also consider you to be one of my best friends.”

"Ouch, just one of them? That's cold." Jungkook pouted, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Sorry, Yara's got spot number one on lock." You shrugged, bringing your juice box to your mouth as you took a sip. "Chicks before dicks."

"Fine, but tell me I'm at least best friend number two."

"Hmm..." You tapped at your chin, pretending to think about your response.

"What the hell? Who could possibly be before me? Taehyung?...Kiri?" Jungkook teased.

At the sound of Kiri's name, you physically tensed, something Jungkook didn't fail to notice.

"...Yep, definitely Kiri." You played along half-heartedly.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" You straightened up suddenly, turning towards the boy. "You told me Kiri left you for Eunwoo, right?"

"Yeah... Why?"

"Oh. Well, I dunno, I heard from someone that you and Kiri were actually broken up at the time." You fiddled with your fingers anxiously, choosing to omit the fact that his ex-girlfriend had been your source of information.

The long-haired boy stared at you for a moment, expression unreadable as he took in your uneasy state.

"Well. Yeah. We weren't together." He answered finally, causing your stomach to drop.

Wait... Kiri had told the truth?

"But you said she left you for him? You lied to me." You breathed in disbelief.

"Hold on, I didn't lie." He pressed, brows furrowing at your words. "Yes, we weren't together, but we weren't broken up either?"

You flashed him a confused look, urging him to explain further.

He let out a sigh, stretching out his legs in front of him, "We had been arguing a lot, like more than usual, so we both agreed to take a break from each other– nothing permanent, just some time apart where we didn't see each other every day like we had been. The morning before I met you, however, I was coming down one of the halls at the Beta Tau Sigma house when I caught her sneaking out of Eunwoo's room. She broke up with me before I even got to say a single word. So yeah. She left me for Eunwoo."

You felt your shoulders fall, body relaxing at this new information.

"Oh."

"I was going to take her out for dinner that same day too. Clearly, we were on different pages on what this break was supposed to be for. Any other questions?" Jungkook quirked an eyebrow up at you pointedly, and suddenly you were filled with guilt.

Was this whole thing really just one giant miscommunication between the two? Kiri under the impression that they were broken up while Jungkook wasn’t? Jeez, you really jumped the gun there, didn't you?

"Ah, shit... Well, now I feel like a total wastoid for accusing you of lying." You expressed your regret, poking a finger into his thigh sheepishly.

Jungkook gave you a once over before chuckling, a hand reaching out to take your face between his fingers as he squeezed your cheeks.

"Say you're sorry."

"'M s’rry!" Your muffled words came through squished lips causing him to giggle.

"Say 'Gosh, Jungkook! You're such an honest and wonderful person. I'm a fool for ever doubting you.’'" He smirked. You rolled your eyes, face having grown sore.

"Asshole, let m’go! M'cheeks hurt!"

Thankfully, he granted your request, freeing your cheeks from their state of enslavement so that you could rub at them woefully.

"You're a child." You scowled.

"You sound like Kiri." Jungkook reminisced, recalling how his ex-girlfriend often said those very words.

"Yeah, well, soon enough it'll be her saying that instead of me." You joked.

The joke fell flat, failing to earn even a smile from him.

"Nah," he replied coldly, "like you said, if she wanted me back, she'd already have come back."

You cursed internally. You had completely forgotten you had spat that out while scolding Jungkook for nearly going apeshit on Eunwoo, and once again, you were left feeling shitty.

"Hey, I said that out of frustration, I didn't really mean it. I'm sure she'll come crawling back soon." You attempted to comfort him, hoping to sound sincere.

"Even if that's true, I'm not entirely sure I want that anymore."

"What?" You blinked. Jungkook shrugged.

"What about us?" He met your eyes, causing your breath to hitch.

"What about us?"

Jungkook stared at you for a moment, noting the way the timber in your voice had become higher pitched as if panicked.

"Yara told me how you'd be really bummed if you lost me once Kiri and I got back together. But Y/N, Kiri is going to think you're my ex-girlfriend... there's just no way she'd be okay with me hanging out with you. I don't know if I want to get back together with her if it's going to hurt you..."

The chirps of nearby birds slowly fizzed into a dull hum, drowned out by the deafening pounding of your heart.

Your face felt hot. When you told Yara all that stuff about how fond you had grown of Jungkook, you had been notably drunk from Roommate Wine Night, uncharacteristically vulnerable and in your head. Even so, you didn't think that Yara was gonna go and tell him.

She was so dead.

But what the hell was he saying? He would give up on Kiri just so you didn't have to lose him? He'd give up what he wanted just for you?

"Idiot." You scoffed suddenly, taking him by surprise. "Who cares about me? Yes, I'll probably be really sad that we don't get to hang out anymore but, whatever, I'll get over it. I got my event. You're going to get your end of the deal too, I'll make sure of it."

Your determination was hard set in your eyes which held his pensive ones.

"Kiri will come back, okay? Like, c'mon! She knows she can't do better than you."

Jungkook shot you an insincere smile, "Ah, I'm not so sure she thinks that's true anymore."

"Stop. Listen to me, Jungkook, you're a fucking great guy, okay? You're charismatic and funny and care about your friends... sure, you almost ruined my event, but it was mostly to defend my best friend when Eunwoo got too pushy, right? You're a good guy, meathead. I know I joke about your ego, but I really believe you're capable of more than you think you are. Seriously, Kiri is so lucky to be the object of your affection."

Jungkook watched the way the sun's orange light kissed your face, a bittersweet feeling growing in his chest as he contemplated the object of his affection. Just a couple of months ago, he would have had no doubt about who held his heart, but as you held his stare, he found himself unsure and yet, entirely sure all the same.

“Jungkook? You okay?” You frowned, catching in the sadness in his eyes.

“Hm? Yeah, yeah. I just… realized something.”

“Oh? What's that?”

“...It doesn't matter.” He smiled, the gesture hardly reaching his eyes.

You looked at him for a moment, skepticism evident in those beautiful eyes of yours that reflected the sky's deepening orange and red colors. Jungkook felt like he was sinking into them. Burying himself further and further into a hole that he was unaware had even existed until now and he was in too deep to pull himself back up.

"Kiss me." He spoke softly, making your eyes grow wide. "Please."

There was a note of melancholy to his tone, unlike you had ever heard come from him before. You fought back to urge to dissect it further, choosing instead to oblige his request and press your mouth into his, the thought that he was holding you tighter than usual failing to cross your mind.

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“Hey, hey, hey, hey! What is going on here?”

Yara giggled at the television show, popping a chip into her mouth, the crunching sound pulling you from the thought that had been occupying your mind. Tugging at scrunchie you had on your wrist, you searched for the right way to go about sharing your feelings.

“Yara?”

“Yeah?” The girl in question responded, eyes still fixated on the ever so charming A.C. Slater.

“...Nevermind.” You retracted, shaking your head dismissively.

And just like that, the Saved By The Bell episode was entirely forgotten, Yara's hands taking purchase on your shoulders.

“Bitch, you already have my attention, don’t just blue balls me like that.” She whined, shaking you slightly. You turned away from her curious eyes.

“It’s just… ah, seriously, nevermind, I’m pretty sure I’m just up in my head.” You shrugged her off, leaning back into the couch.

Your best friend watched your suddenly indifferent presence with pursed lips, not buying it for a second.

“You’re gonna ask about Jungkook, right?”

You turned towards Yara, suspicious written all over your narrowed eyes, “How did you know that?”

“I’m a mind reader.” She rolled her eyes passively, turning back to the television. “So, what’s up?”

“I dunno, I just feel like things are so... different between us.”

At your revelation, Yara’s eyes flicked back over to you, “Bad different?”

“No. It’s actually kind of nice. I think.” You frowned, trying to make sense of your thoughts.

“So... good different.” Yara concluded.

“It’s just funny. When I look at the start this whole deal between Jungkook and me—”

“You mean back when you and Jungkook weren’t going at it like animals and having secret rooftop picnics?”

You held her stare for a moment, teeth sinking down into your bottom lip.

“Yeah. Things are so different. I remember a time where I couldn’t even stand being in the same room as him and now…”

"And now you're completely infatuated with him." She sympathized, shaking her head sadly.

“W-What? What the hell are you yapping about? I was gonna say that I actually think of him as a close friend.”

“Oh, Y/N.” Yara let out a breath, her hand placing itself on your head.

“Poor, poor stupid Y/N.” She patted it with a sad look. “How blind you are.”

You swatted your best friend’s hand away, “Get your grubby paws off of me, weirdo. I do not like Jungkook!”

There was an uncomfortable feeling in your throat as you said those words; you swallowed it down immediately.

“Seriously? Y/N, you’re whipped for that kid. Big time.”

“I thought I told you to lay off the crack.” You deadpanned.

“Funny.” Yara glared. “Seriously though, you guys are walking around in a fake relationship while having real feelings for each other and real sex. If anyone’s trippin', it’s you two.”

“Okay, just because people have sex doesn’t mean feelings are always involved.” You scoffed.

“Oh girl, you don’t have to tell that to me, my emotionally constipated ass knows that better than anyone.” Yara mused before shaking her head. “But it’s different with you guys. I see the way you light up whenever he’s near. It’s totally palpable the way you two yearn for each other.”

That wasn't true, wasn't it? Sure, you did notice yourself thinking about him whenever you weren't with him, but wasn't that just because he was a friend? Don't friends usually wonder what the other is doing whenever they're apart? Didn't friends spend hours thinking about the time they spent with each other after they parted?

Suddenly, you felt nauseous.

“Fuck.” You breathed out.

Yara pressed her lips together, taking in the way you suddenly looked like you were one second away from barfing into the bowl of popcorn you had on your lap. She had a reasonably strong guess as to what exactly was running through your mind at this very moment.

"Wanna hear something funny?" She said finally, offering you a change of subject should you take it.

"Yes, please." Was your weak reply.

“I’ve fucked Eunwoo. Eunwoo has fucked Kiri. Kiri has fucked Jungkook, and Jungkook has fucked you."

You blinked, "Yeah?"

"Hello!" Yara exclaimed, "Isn’t that wild? It’s like one big orgy!”

A sharp snort left your nose, sufficiently amused.

"Only one thing left to do for this love chain to come full circle." Yara's eyes suddenly grew mischievous, scooting in closer to you.

"Yeah? And what's that?"

"We gotta get it on, baby!" Yara waggled her eyebrows suggestively, sending you into a round of laughter. She grinned back at you. "Why are you laughing? You don't think I could rock your world?"

"I think you're insane and need to get laid by someone who isn't me." You reasoned, nudging your shoulder into hers.

"Ugh, you're probably right." She sighed in defeat. You knew Yara well enough that this was her attempt to distract you and make you feel better, and honestly, it had worked. For the most part.

You let out a sigh of your own, leaning over to rest the side of your head against hers.

"Do you really think I like Jungkook?" You asked quietly.

Yara let out a contemplative hum as if considering her reply before speaking.

"Honestly, what I think doesn't really matter. What matters is how you feel, you know?"

"Yeah," you exhaled, biting the inside of your cheek as a sinking feeling of understanding finally washed over you, "I think I do."

[bakulova]

Being Soulmates In Prison…

Present!Carol X Reader

This is a PT1 of 2.

Hope You Enjoy!

In this soulmate AU, your world would be all black and white until you find your soulmate. All Carols life she had wanted to know who her soulmate was but never found them because she was trapped in that hell hole. So she’d given up when she was very young. Not thinking anyone would give her world color. She stopped thinking about it after a while. She grew used to this boring black and white world. she heard other stories from the other ladies about them and their soulmates. how lovely it was to see color. Any time she felt that someone was rubbing it in her face she snapped at them which was pretty often. When she got older she grew less impulsive and outwardly aggressive and just glared and gave a sassy remark towards that person. 

When you transferred her whole world turn upside down. Color bursting everywhere when she stared at you in a mini group of cookie. Even in that ugly orange outfit she thought you were the most beautiful person in this whole prison. She stopped breathing for a second. Her pupils dilating. Her jaw dropping just staring at you amazed. At the time she was playing bridge with some of the ladies she regularly played with. They all look at her waiting for her to play but see that she isn’t even paying attention. They all turn their attention to what she’s looking at. You. They all giggle “Carol? It’s your turn” Carol shakes herself from her little daydream and plays but still taking glances at your retreating form. She wanted you so bad but she didn’t want to scare you away. She wanted your attention. To feel your touch. Oh what she’d do for you. At the same time she felt a little disgusted with herself. Why was she yearning for you so hard? Wasn’t she straight? Why was the world giving her a female for a soulmate? Why just why? 

When you transferred you didn’t actually see her so your world was still black and white. When you were younger you always looked out for your soulmate. Not wanting to see the boring black and white anymore. You wanted to see the beautiful colors like everyone else could. Like your parents could. All of your friends had started finding soulmates during highschool. All you had ever wished for was the same experience. To be young and know your soulmate but instead you were just met with the same old boring black and white. After highschool you had just given up. Your parents told to keep trying but you ignore them saying “It’s doesn’t matter” they let it go after that. When you got arrested for drugs and battery on a girl who truly instigated it but whatever that’s when your world changed for either the worst or better. You walk into the common area with a couple of new people, you looked at the CO Ginger for your room number. “Alright L/N C106″ You nod and head over and meet a girl with an annoying accent. “hiya.” She tilts her head and looks you up and down. “I’m Madison but my friends call me Badison” You nod and start setting your stuff up but it didn’t seem that BAdiSOn was done with annoying you. “So roomie what did you do?” You pause and look at her annoyed “None of your business” she scoffs and throws your pillow off your bed. “oops” she starts to walk away but she stops at the doorway and turns around “Watch the attitude” and walks away. You roll your eyes and put your pillow back on your bed “What a child” you whisper. 

The place where you finally noticed Carol was at lunch. You had grabbed your tray and sat down trying to enjoy your peace until Madison decided that she wanted to pour your drink onto all of your food. Of course Carol noticed that sad excuse of a worker trying to bother you. “Badison get over here now!” Badison immediately stopped trying to be ‘funny’ and left with a little mutter “yes Carol” When you looked at Carol you had to blink a couple of times. It was a little awkward since she was staring back. Carol notice that you finally found out and motioned you to come over. You nervously got up and walked over with your head down looking at the beige tray and noticing the color of your horrible outfit. You finally look up and see the table is kinda… very much full. Carol had noticed to so she motioned for Brock to move. You sat down shakily and looked at Carol. She was already staring at you. Never taking her eyes off you as you slowly continued eating. It was silent and kinda nice and comforting till Teng ruined it. “What is she doing here?” She looks between you and Carol. Carol breaks away from you for a second “None of your business” Teng glares at you and rolls her eyes. Then badison adds “So Carol what did my roomie do?” Carol takes another second and looks down at her food  and repeats “None of your business”  Badison throws her arms up. “OK Ok no more questions got it”

Once lunch was over you go to get up but Carol stops you. “No no stay” she gestures for your to sit back down. You comply but you look back down and mutter “What about my tray? I kinda need to dump it…” she nods and looks at Teng “Bust her tray will ya” Teng reluctantly grabs your and her tray but not without spilling a little on you. “Oops sorry” She snickers. You roll your eyes and try to wipe away the spill mark “asshole”. Carol glares when Teng comes back and sits down next to you. “Hey you move next to me” Carol pats the open seat next to her. Everyone looks around trying to find out who she’s talking about. You look around before you notice she was talking to you. You slowly get up, walk around the table and sit down. You sigh and look around the common area. “Whats your name cookie” You look at Carol “L/N” she nods “your first name.” “Y/n” she nods and purses her lips. 

After sitting in silence for like an hour Carol made some ladies come over to play a game. You lay your head on the table and she notice right away “Oh sorry am I boring you?” You shrug “A little” she scoff and says something to the women surrounding you both. They all leave, she turns and tilts her head. “So Soulmate want to not be bored?” You turn your head but still rest it on the table “Hmm Sure” She chuckles “Ever played Bridge?” You shake your head “Alright you’ll be learning that today I guess” After a few minutes of explaining she asks for some of the girls to come back and play and invites you to be her partner. When the game ended and you two won she had asked you to come with her to her room. 

“So Soulmate what are we gonna do?” she asks while pushing back towards the wall. You look around her room anywhere but give up when you back is pressed up against the wall and she is the only thing you can see. “I honestly don’t know. I never imagined I would meet you…” she nods and stares at your face feeling the need to pull you in for a long kiss but she refrained and puts her hands on your waist “Maybe we can get you transferred to my room” You gulp “Then we can learn more about each other” You nod hesitantly and put your hands on her hips gripping them tight. She moans and pulls you in for a kiss. Taken by surprise you gasp and she invade your mouth with her tongue. You moaned and tug at her clothes but before she could go any further with you, you were interrupted by an annoying Boston accent. 

“Gee Carol didn’t know you where gettin down like this” Carol keeps her back to Badison and kisses you once more before rolling her eyes and pulling away and turning around “What do you want badison.” Carol moves to the door to keep badison away from you “I just wanted to talk to you about the cookie but it seems your eating her right now” Carol growls “Request a transfer for me” Badison perks up “You wanna be my roomie?” Carol glares “No never, I want a transfer for L/N” Badison looks back at you who is looking through magazines “Oh ok” Badison looks back and gives you a nasty face and sulks her way out to get that transfer done.  Carol watches badison leave and turns back around “What are you doing” You look up from your magazine “Nothing” She walks towards you  and pulls the magazine out of your hands and pulls you close “I-” “Inmate this isn’t your cell” Hellman stares at you and Carol for a few minutes “Get out and back to your cell if you wanted to rest” You look around confused “But-” “Do you want a shot? Do you wanna go down to ad seg?” You shake your head “Then I suggest you get a move on it” You look at Carol one last time then leave quickly. Hellman of course being the nasty fuck that he is, looks you up and down. 

Carol glares at him “Ain’t she fine. Do you think she could handle my big dick?” Carol rolls her eyes “She’s not yours in-fact she’s mine” Hellman raises an eyebrow “Yours?” She nods. He throws his hands up. “Badison is sending a transfer for L/N” “Wow moving in so fast” Carol shrugs. She signals him to leave an which he does. He leaves and Carol goes back down to her table and doesn’t see you anywhere. She gets up and goes to your room and sees you resting with your pillow on your head. She walks in and kneels beside you “Y/n… Y/n?” she whispers to you and shakes you gently. You groan “ leave me alone, I just want sleep…” she smirks and moves the pillow off your head and moves your messy hair out of your face “Come out to play bridge with me” You open your eyes a little bit “Why I’m really not that good” She shrugs “That’s why I help you” You rub your eyes and slowly slug over to the table. You sit down and Carol plops down next to you and starts dealing out cards. You guys play and play learning more about each other.  

[backtothestart02]

Kissed On Impulse - 1/1? | westallen fanfiction

A/N: Inspired by a 2x19 gif of Iris patching Barry up. Let me know if you want more. If not this’ll stay as a one-shot w/ the reader making up their own ending as to how things could get resolved. Enjoy!

...

Synopsis:  2x19 - Canon Divergent - Patching Barry up does something to Iris' insides.

...

Iris smoothed the bandage out on Barry’s torso and tried very hard to remember to breathe.

It was hard being this close to him, and actually touching him like this too. Usually there was a couple feet of space between them, but with Caitlin gone she was there to play nurse. No one better really, she was his best friend. If he’d still been with Patty, it would be different. If Caitlin was still here, it would be different. If Caitlin hadn’t looked her in the eye and basically forced her to confess she was into Barry, things would be different.

But they weren’t.

She’d been trying to focus on the problems at hand – Caitlin kidnapped by Zoom, Zoom about to make his next strike on Central City at any time, and Barry powerless due to his giving up his powers to the speed-obsessed maniac in exchange for her brother’s life.

Those were all huge issues, and they were easy to focus on. Even more importantly was being there for Barry as a friend.

But at moments like these, it was just hard to focus on any of those things. Instead she focused on how close they were, what his abs felt like beneath that bandage, how deep of a green his eyes were when she had the chance to look, and how she’d never felt butterflies quite this intense since…well, she couldn’t even remember how long it had been. Maybe ever.

And Barry was watching her put the bandage on too. Talk about pressure. What if it came off and she was forced to look at his muscles again? The aggravation.

So when she finally finished securing that bandage, and there was no real reason to keep touching him, she released him, and he started pulling his shirts back down so his skin was out of sight.

That should’ve helped, but it didn’t.

Instead, when he got up off the bed and started to move faster, she collided with him as she stood up simultaneously, grabbed a fistful of his shirt, and pulled his face down to hers so she could kiss him.

He seemed startled at first, and she thought she heard him squeak, as well as heard the others gasp in the cortex just beyond the med bay. But that didn’t matter. All that mattered was that when the squeak subsided, Barry kissed her back.

And not just once, repeatedly. In fact, it took her sticking her tongue into his mouth for him to get a hold of reality and pull back, panting.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, Iris.” He swallowed hard, searching her eyes for an answer – anything.

“Yeah?” she asked, licking her lips, her eyes glued to his.

Look into his eyes, damn it. But that was dangerous too.

“What – what are you doing?” And that made her take a step back. “We, I mean,” he said, hurriedly.

“You’re making out…is what you’re doing,” Cisco said from the cortex.

They both froze and looked over at Cisco, Joe, and Jesse all watching them with various stages of amusement on their faces.

“Jesse, uh…why don’t you repeat what you were saying about our aging meta. I think Mr. Flash and his quick fix over here might’ve missed it.”

Barry wrapped his hand around the back of his head, and Iris cleared her throat. Not wanting the moment to be over, but not really having a choice, she powerwalked out of the med bay and into the cortex as Jesse re-explained what was going on with the meta and the potential plan there was in taking him down and rescuing Harry in the process.

They both listened as attentively as they could, but when the plan ended in Joe, Cisco, and Jesse all having to leave, they found themselves alone again. Only now, Barry had sunken back into his depression of how he was supposed to function as a hero without his powers, and Iris knew it was no longer the time to discuss how she’d suddenly kissed him out of nowhere and he’d kissed back.

“So…Barry.”

“What was that, Iris?”

Then again, maybe she was wrong.

“Wanna do it again?” she asked, hopefully, only half-jokingly.

Barry laughed, actually laughed. She couldn’t remember the last time that had happened, and she felt proud of herself for being the cause of it.

“Yeah, actually.” He turned to look at her. “But we should probably talk about it first.”

“Right.” She slipped her hands into her pockets and rocked on her heels.

“Do you…like me?”

She bit her bottom lip.

“More than like, actually.”

His eyes widened, and he exhaled.

“Wow. Really?” She nodded. “For how long.”

“A while. I just…with Eddie and everything, I felt guilty for having feelings.”

“And now you don’t?” he asked carefully.

She shrugged and sighed.

“They’re kind of overwhelming.”

He nodded. “I know the feeling.”

“Do you…still?” she asked.

“I mean, I kissed you back, didn’t I?”

“You also pulled away.”

“You stuck your tongue down my throat!”

“You don’t like that, I take it.”

“No! Yes! I mean… I do.” He took a breath. “I really do. I just…wasn’t expecting it. I needed a conversation. With everything that’s been going on recently, this was the last thing I expected to happen after getting beat up by a meta.”

She winced. “Sorry.”

“No! God, no, don’t apologize. I liked it. I liked it a lot. And I do want to do it again. Just…now is just a-”

“Bad time,” she finished.

“Yeah.”

“I understand. No more kissing, and especially no tongue action, until you have your powers back and Caitlin’s back and Zoom’s defeated and-”

“Seems like a lot to wait for, doesn’t it?” His brows fused together.

“Yeah.” She laughed. “And I mean I’ve been waiting to kiss you for so long, I-”

“Oh, screw it.”

He closed the distance between them, sunk his fingers into her hair, and kissed her hard on the mouth. This time he was the one to stick his tongue down her throat, and she eagerly reciprocated. It wasn’t long until they were pressed up against one of the computers, messing up each other’s hair, and feeling like they had way too many clothes on.

Iris was the one to break the kiss this time.

“W-wait.” She licked her lips. “This is fast, I think. I mean, right?”

Barry was silent.

“Right?” she asked again.

“Right. Right! Totally.” He took a step back from her. “I mean, what are we thinking? We just have sex while everyone is busy, and then-”

She pursed her lips, staring at his, and then he took her hand and pulled her down the hallway until they ran smack dab into Cisco and Jesse.

“Hello!”

“Wow, hi.”

“Hey.”

“Were you two…going somewhere?” Cisco looked between them.

“What? No, that’s…” Barry looked at Iris’ hungry eyes and immediately dropped his grasp on her hand. “That’s…silly.”

“They were gonna do it,” Jesse informed Cisco.

“Uh-huh.”

Iris sputtered a giant laugh.

“We were not gonna do it. That’s…that’s ridiculous. So soon? And here? Of all places? What?”

Barry shook his head at her to stop while she was ahead.

“Uh-huh. Right.”

“Well,” Cisco said, “You two will just have to go at it like rabbits when all this is over.”

Barry and Iris avoided eye contact.

“I have a plan.”

[utterlyhopeful-fics]

Already Gone (SOA x Mayans Crossover)

A/N: Deep diving back into my roots. SOA will forever be near and dear to my angsty heart! This chapter primarily focuses on Y/N and Jax but following parts will include my Mayans. As always, feedback is GOLD!

SIDE NOTE: Huge shout out to @creativepromptsforwriting for motivating this story into fruition. Your blog is beyond inspirational!

If I keep tagging you and you’re not interested or you’d like to be tagged; please let me know!

MASTERLIST 

Jax Teller x Reader (then we’re in Mayans territory :D )

Word Count: 2375k

Warnings: language, mention of biker gangs, slight female degradation, angst, sprinkles of heartbreak. 

*********************************

Daylight vanished drifting into another starless evening. Nightfall succumbed to a starless evening. Y/N wished to be anywhere else in the universe than where she currently found herself; the Sons clubhouse. In childish hopes, she stilled all movement adjusting her jacket nervously fidgeting with the hem. The door swung back under her touch; light reflected back harshly in the demurely lit bar. Smoke descended throughout the congested area; clouds of hazy fog engulfed her lungs. Here goes nothin.

The air wreaked of putrid obscenity and cheap tequila. First and foremost, Y/N met Chucky’s charismatic stare. She sent him an anxious grin impulsively pleading for uneasiness in her stomach to subdue. The one-handed man remained surrounded by countless liquor bottles engrossed in order after order shifting gears from her. 

Every man and member leeched on to the closest thing in a short skirt, tits overflowing from too small blouses, and topped off in four-inch platforms. Any girl within proximity of the Sons all had a similar motto; barely-there skirts and perky tits. There was no doubt sex was the main attraction tonight.

And to this very day, she played nice with them so long as they abided by one rule in particular; Jax was untouchable. She was their queen bee. Glancing down at her outfit; she preferred a more comfortable approach. She paired tonight’s look with her favorite pair of worn out high-waisted jeans styled with a Ramones crop top finalized with suede black booties. Her body was a sacred temple and only those granted permission were able to worship her. She made sure of that. Loud conversations vibrated from table to table, voices lost in the chaos increasing with every passing decibel.

Y/n scanned the room peering for one particular member; Jax fucking Teller. In childhood, Mr. President and Y/N friendship blossomed as close friends before ultimately admitting their feelings five years ago. The wildest five years of her entire life. Her thoughts quickly darkened, if only someone would’ve warned her those three years ago. If only Y/N hadn’t welcomed him with welcoming, open arms. But sometimes life’s a bitch, and the hardest way is merely the only route.

Her clandestine orbs voraciously whipped back and forth jumping from person to person. In her search, Opie sat alone at a corner table secluding himself willing her his direction. The pitiful look in his eyes was enough to make her stomach flip. Long ago, she grew weary with the amount of messes that befell on Opie. Their relationship bordered along best friend status, always seeking the other out. Ranging from moments of clarity to cruelty, Opie Winston never once betrayed the trust instilled upon him.

She already knew what bullshit lay ahead; it was his shitty way of apologizing for Jax’s past, present, and future fuck-ups. In the back of her mind, Y/N convinced herself she was different to him, that she was his one. But nowadays, doubt replaced confidence as Y/N drifted farther out of reach/touch. Her feet clumped heavy against the wood suddenly weighing her down. Making her way through the crowd, Y/N plopped herself closest to Op.

Her palms dampened in sweat wishing the fall beneath her to open up swallowing her whole. “So, this was the big meeting Jax was in a rush to get to?”

His eyes bounced from side to side searching for any way out of the conversation; “Shit Y/N...”

Y/N collapsed next to the burly man nuzzling deeper into the warmth of his neck, quietly leaning in closer so he could hear her clearly; “I know it’s not your fault, Op. I just wish he respected me enough to be honest with me. I can’t keep living like this anymore, he’s breaking me… I’m sure going to miss you, big bear.”

Y/N waited patiently for the wheels to turn in his brain. “You’re a smart man. Connect the clues, buddy.”

“You—You’re leaving?”

Her heart plummeted into uncharted territory; her head bobbled too quickly, too excitedly almost as if she’d been rifling for a way out of this life, out of their lives. She glanced sadly at him, really appreciating his handsome appearance while trying to memorize the man who’d kept her insanely calm since middle school. There was no hiding the bemudding frown etching her lips. His lengthy, luscious hair and accompanying brawny beard was enough to make any woman swoon.

If only she’d chosen him to protect her heart but what ifs were a dangerous path to question. Add in his admirable qualities and he was the gleaming winner. The man Y/N should’ve pursued but she was a fool and fell for the Teller trick over and over again. Long ago, Opie came to the conclusion that Y/N would never leave his side, not even if the devil bribed her himself. Her departure was agitating, possibly selfish, but absolutely necessary. Jax breaks everything he touches…eventually.

“Some bitch is grinding against his junk and you expect me to be alright with it? Boy’s got another thing comin if he thinks I’ll always be waitin to greet him at the front door.”

Words jumbled on the tip of her palate; ‘I just wanted to talk to you first before shit goes down. I’m so thankful for you, always know that.”

Op stared down at his dirty boots unable to meet her dejected orbs.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. You deserve more than his half ass shit. Ya know, I was afraid Jax had sucked out all that rad awesomeness you possessed before you decided to get together. He’s my brother, don’t get me wrong. But, he’s kinda the biggest dick on the planet and not the good kind. I’m proud you found your backbone. Here I thought you’d softened up…”

“Haha, glad to see you think so highly of me still! Please take care of yourself.”

“I’m a phone call away if you need me. Any time, any day, I’ll be there.”

His arms draped around her exposed waist rubbing soothing circles on her lower back. Her chin rested atop of broad shoulder before she reluctantly pulled away from his embrace.

A few tables over Jax’s arms seductively draped his arm around the croweater’s exposed waist. Every few minutes the chick gyrated submissively against him cock arousal his member. Jax closed his eyes inhaling a puff of his cigarette thinking of the girl waiting at home for him. All he had to do was find the courage to get up and leave. But this was the life, his life and Y/N understood him better than anyone else. So, he accepted the Yaeger bomb from girl with the rose tattoo and smiled widely. Fuck ‘em. He leaned incredibly closer connecting his lips to her plump ones.

Her sultry tone echoed into his ear; “Mmm, you taste like sin…”

Jax chuckled in retort; Darling, you ain’t even taste the best part yet…”

Disgust and fury ran uncontrollable through her body radiating to an explosively dangerous level. She quietly whispered; “This fucking asshole…” as she compelled herself to clear the lump in her throat noisily.

Her annoyance was beginning to peak into seething eruption; “You’ve got some damn nerve, Jax. That I can give ya. Such a lady’s man.”

A shudder ran through his vertebrates forcing the hairs along his neck to stand painfully on the edge. Her words were impudently brash bouncing off her rosy plump lips.

“Can’t say I didn’t warn ya, doll.” His arched brow sprouted newfound madness as Y/N daydreamed of punching that shit grin off his idiotic face. But his eyes told another tale, his sapphire irises brimmed with tacit concern and uncertainty.

Her life with Jax was a never-ending roller coaster. Exhilaration awaited them at every corner until it didn’t. No matter how many wrongdoings Jax committed, Y/N dutifully stayed by his side never daring to question his authority. Gemma taught her of loyalty, of the importance of family eternally sticking together, and to never turn her back when the going gets rough because it was bound to cross a line if you survived long enough. The Sons checked their moral ambiguities when they patched in, sacrificing their soul for the benefit of the club.  

So, Y/N’s skin thickened as time meandered on, and as Jax shacked up with Wendy, and again every time she watched some slut leave his dorm every night. Honestly, she should thank Jax for her turned her into the dominantly powerful woman she became that awakened Jax’s feelings. But now, now he was the reason her heart was breaking.  

She cleared her throat attempting to draw his attention; “Wow, seems like you’ve got your hands full tonight. Didn’t realize I needed to make a reservation.” Her eyes penetrated his, he looked like a deer in blinding headlights at the recognizable voice in front of him.

The girl seating in Jax’s lap had the audacity to open her bright fuchsia painted lips; “He’s busy tonight. Shoo, buh-bye.” Motioning her hand in Y/N’s direction.

Y/N eyed the broad up judging her every spectacle of the way. She bit the corner of her lips in attempt to register what her mind couldn’t.

She clicked on tongue in vast disapproval at the idiot before her; “Listen here, bitch. I’m Y/N, his old lady and you’re going to get the fuck up and listen to the words leaving my mouth and find another lap to occupy, NOW.” She put on her fakest high pitched voice just to prove a point; “Got it? Good, now if you make me repeat myself, I’d love the opportunity to fuck up that plastic face of yours. Now, Shoo.”

The random girl gulped unwillingly to challenge the alpha female and meekly wagged her head in agreeance. Jax noticed the slight tremor as she removed herself from his grasp trudging in defeat. He sighed in extreme exasperation; “Congratulations, you’ve got my attention…now talk.”

“Ugh, I’m seriously starting to question what the hell I’ve been doing with an asshat like you for so long? Seriously Jax, what the shit?”

He remained irrationally irritated Y/N had chosen a party to air out their dirty laundry. She was undermining him in front of his brothers, nobody challenged him. This was yet another lesson he’d teach Y/N the difficult way.

“You’re makin a scene! Let’s talk this outside?” He seized her arm dragging Y/N behind him. Her heels dug into the surface fighting his weight with her own. Jax glanced back at her stubbornness on display and/snickered sinfully.

“No, I’m fine where I am.”

Jax invaded her space, his breath jostled against her peach fuzz. He hovered dangerously close to her, fury seeping from his freckled skin.

“Ah, the mighty heroine here to save herself. Classic, real good Y/N.”

Y/N huffed venting her building frustrations; “I can’t do this anymore, Jax.” Her voice wavered in confidence before erupted in sadness; I fucking won’t do this anymore.”

Jax Teller rolled his eyes before sighing annoyingly loud; “You always say this shit, Y/N. And you always keep comin back for more. This is a dance we memorized baby girl, our dance.”

Her fists ignited into internal rage; her breathing skyrocketed to unbridled anger. Typical biker to neglect the actual words leaving a woman’s mouth in this hell hole.  

“So, I guess that makes me the fool and you the asshole, hmm? Yes, I might be a fucking glutton for punishment but at least I have a heart, some decency of a moral compass to abide by. But you, Jax? You would burn the world simply because you were bored. And right now, this is me telling you I quit. Go fuck one of your many other mindless wannabes. I bet they’re beggin for Jax Teller’s cock as we speak.”

His cockiness was beginning to push her past the point of no return as he growled his words from his venomous mouth; “I don’t doubt that darling. The question of the hour is if you’re really sure you wanna throw in the towel?”

Y/N’s head whipped around fast; her eyes blazed in pure hatred; “The biggest mistake you ever made was letting love come into your life. You fuck up everything you touch. Have a nice life, Teller.”

Heavy footsteps clonked against the wooden slats swiftly rushing towards the front doors of the clubhouse. She approached the entrance grazing her knuckles along the worn material. In the upper right-hand corner, the smallest of carvings adorned the walk away years later; their initials carved for the world to bear witness. Digging through her purse, Y/N located her car keys and stood on her tiptoes scratching at the etchings now nothing but mere wood indentions. Fuck happy endings. No wait, fuck this ending.

Finally, anger breached its imminent tipping point as his temper imploded. His arms gripped hers excruciatingly firm slamming her against the wall aligned of mugshots. A frame or two randomly dropped closer by. Jax was the Kurt Cobain to her Courtney Love; both destined and simultaneously cursed. Glass pierced the ground piece by piece. Her eyes fully dilated as fear crept into her smug demeanor. Her breath came out in short, timid, huffs as quaked in anxiousness.

“You’re my girl, Y/N. Don’t do this shit. You know I love you.”

Confliction cowered in her bones. His ragged and pathetic tone drew her in wrapping itself snugly around her. She knew that if she would have heard these words any other day, she would have declared it the best day of her life and would have started to call everyone to let them know that he finally said the words! But today was not that day and all she wanted to do right now was putting her hands over her ears and stop listening.

She spewed her virulent words once and for all; “You’re not the person I thought you were.”

Her body went rigid in his arms as sorrow clung to her like forgotten hope. She was losing him, sacrificing a piece of her heart for her own freedom. She loathed the man Jax evolved into but somewhere under his façade lived the gentle poet who stole her soul. Jax snickered obnoxiously before a murderous grin took ahold; “No. I’m just not the person you wanted me to be.”

Tags: @twistnet @ifoundmyhappythought @angelreyesgirl89 @carlaangel86 @summertimesadnesswithadashofsass @imagineredwood @gemini0410 @mayans-mc @reaperwalking @prospectfandom @emmaveale123​ @peaky-marvel @kind-wolf​ @scorpio4dayzzz​ @starrynite7114​ @penny4yourthot​ @breanime​ @whyisgmora​ @thegirlwhowritesfics​ @star017​ @threeminutesoflife​ 

[tloujm]

Part XVII: Funnel of Love

Author’s Notes: Sorry it took so long.

Genre: Fluff + Angst = this chapter

Summary: This takes place right after the last chapter. The newly engaged couple share the news with their loved ones. The wedding planning pressure is on. 

Ship: Joel x Reader

“Well, well, well. Big bro is doing it for real this time, huh.” Tommy began with a wide grin on his face. “Congratulations, Joel. I mean it. I always knew it was gonna be the two of you since the first day y’all showed up at the gates.” Joel relieved one of the watchtower guards so he could talk to Tommy about the proposal. They were both up in the small wooden shelter, rifles in hand, glancing between each other and the world beyond the gates.

“Thanks, brother.” Joel donned a bashful smirk.

“So do I get to be best man?” Tommy asked.

“Weren’t you already best man?” Joel countered.

“Yeah, but that time didn’t really count.” Tommy explained. Joel shot him a glare as a response to the dismissal of his first marriage. He knew that this time was different though, so he couldn’t blame him.

“‘Course you’re my best man.”

*****

“Joel? Miller? Of the infamous Miller brothers?” Jesse exclaimed.

“You knew we were together.” You said. Jesse was your closest friend at the settlement, therefore, he was the first person you told. You had reservations about sharing the news with him because, for a moment while you and Joel were broken up, you grew feelings for Jesse. It was something you never shared out loud or in your journal. Not sure of whether the feelings truly stemmed from Jesse himself or your emotions from Joel, you didn’t feel right giving weight to those thoughts. Despite Joel’s suggestion, you always figured Jesse’s feelings were purely platonic anyway.

“Yeah, I know. It just seems very official. I didn’t think people still did that these days.”

“He did manage to surprise me. It was very romantic. You should take some notes just in case you feel compelled to do the same with a special somebody.”

“Take notes? From Joel? Miller? I can be quite romantic on my own, thank you.” Jesse turned to you. “But listen, I’m happy for you. Whatever you need for your upcoming nuptials, let me know.”

“Thank you, I appreciate that.” You responded. It fell silent for a moment while the two of you were cleaning up the stable. 

“I bet you Joel can get you guys a senior discount on a wedding cake from the bakery.” Jesse spoke up. He broke into a fit of laughter as you dropped your broom and threw a handful of hay at him.

“He is not even that old.” You responded defensively.

“No, no. He’s just regular old.” Jesse reasoned jokingly.

“He’s young at heart!”

“(Y/N), He plays the guitar on a rocking chair and whittles for fun.”

“He does other things for fun that I can tell you right now he is not too old for.” You replied with a coy tone in your voice. 

“Alright, alright.” Jesse shook his head playfully and continued sweeping up the straw on the ground. “The jury is still out on how old he is, but I suppose we can both agree that he’s not geriatric.” He reflexively ducked when he heard you drop the broom again to pick up some more hay. 

“So I’m invited to the wedding then?” He asked seriously.

“Of course you are! You’re my best friend.” You replied.

He clears his throat. “Yeah…”

*****

“Honey, I’m home.” Joel said. The words flew out his mouth in a jovial tone. He had never said those words before. It reminded him of a husband from the 1950s coming home from a day at the office. That particular visual didn’t enthuse him, but the idea of seeing you again did. He knew that he’d never wear a suit and work in an office, but he hoped that the rest of his life consisted of coming home to you.

“My love, I’m in here.” Your voice carried from the kitchen. He quickly followed until he stopped right behind you. His arms snaked around your waist as he kissed the top of your head. “What did you do today?”

“I spent some time with Tommy.” He went to go sit down at the island.

“Oh?”

“He asked how our trip went.” He began. You turned to face him.

“You told him about us?” You asked, smiling. He nodded.

“Yeah,” He chuckled. “He asked to be my best man. Did you tell Maria?”

“Yeah, I told her after Jesse.”

“Oh good. He knows.” He began sarcastically. “I better stop catchin’ him gazing at my bride then.”

“Joel, stop. He always knew we were together. But as for Maria, she was super excited. She started talking about wedding stuff like we weren’t living in some fungal zombie infested world. It’s not like I can go dress shopping, or cake tasting or pick out venues. I mean honestly, what’s the point of a wedding?”

“You don’t wanna have a wedding?” He asked.

“I don’t know.” You shrug. “All I want is to get married to you. She was just planning it all out the second I told her and I was feeling overwhelmed.”

“She’s just excited. Take a breath then go back and talk to her. If anyone’s got the connections to throw a wedding, it’s her.”

“What was your wedding like?” You asked.

“You wanna know?” You nodded. He sighed. “It wasn’t much. We cut costs wherever we could so I wore a hand-me-down suit from my dad and Tommy wore a hand-me-down suit from me. The only thing that matched on our suits were the buteniers. It was in one of her aunt’s backyard. It was dead in the middle of summer after school let out, but the only decorations were red, green and blue Christmas tree lights that she put on the bushes. I remember her aunt tasked me and Tommy with going to get some flowers. She gave us some money, but my God, I had no idea how expensive real flowers were. I bought Sarah’s mom a bouquet from the florist while Tommy dumpster dived for some dying flowers that they had just thrown out for the rest of the wedding party.” He shrugged. “The ceremony was quick. The reception was a potluck; everyone brought a dish and their own fold out chairs. Outside of my cousin singing a song, the music was from a boombox. It was simple, but it all came together. I had my own issues with my parents and her side of the family didn’t like me much after I knocked her up, but for that one day, we all got along and it was nice.” 

“Oh. Wow. At least everyone got along.”

He chuckled. “I know it was nothing impressive. It was a shotgun wedding for a couple of teenagers. But I don’t want you to worry about how that went. What matters is now and how we want things to go for us.”

You smiled. “Our wedding can go the exact same way and I wouldn’t care so long as you’re there.”

****

“So,” Maria slammed down a stack of wedding magazines on the coffee table. “I think looking through these would be a good start.”

Maria invited you and some other women over one evening to have a girls night. She had never done this before, but she felt your impending marriage was a good excuse to have one. You didn’t have many female friends. Most were acquaintances, so none of them were as close as Maria and Wendy to you. They were there, but so were a handful of others you’ve only ever spoken to in passing.

Maria had a growing wine collection. She would trade for a bottle or two every so often. For your special occasion, she dusted off two bottles. Wendy made you a homemade pin that said “Bride to be” which she insisted you wear all night. Maria passed the magazines all around the circle you guys made on the floor.

“Maria, where did you get all of these.” You asked.

“I’ve had them all this time. While I was on a scavenging trip one day, and this was years and years ago, I saw them and grabbed them. It was impulsive. I don’t know. Me and Tommy had been together for a while and you know, naturally I started hearing wedding bells even though he never really proposed. I know it's silly to expect happiness in the middle of all this craziness, but it became normal for him and I and despite all this, he stuck by my side. I spent my whole life pre-outbreak wanting a wedding. I mean I wasn’t obsessed with it, but what girl doesn’t want a little fairytale wedding?”

“Tommy never proposed? I thought you guys were married?” Sheila spoke up in between sips.

“We’re basically married. Obviously not under law, but we committed ourselves to each other. I wanted to stop running and just build a future, even a tiny one, for us. He wanted the same. So we settled down and built this place. Well ‘settle down’ as much as we can in this type of world now. But, it was all casual. He brought it up one day while we were eating. He asked if I’d ever want a husband. He asked if it mattered to me.”

“What did you say?” Wendy asked.

“I told him, of course it mattered. At least to me. He gave me that famous Miller half smile,” Maria looked to you as to say ‘You know what I’m talking about’. “And asked if I thought he was husband material. I kinda strung him along for fun. I told him ‘As close to husband material as he can get’. He let out this little laugh and said ‘Well it’s settled then.’ and I thought to myself, I get to be someone’s wife! But not just anyone’s wife, his wife. At that point I couldn’t stop smiling. It wasn’t a proposal in the traditional sense. I guess it still counts, but we never did anything about it since. I guess we just assumed marriage from that point on. We expressed our love for each other, but never spoke the traditional vows. He never called me his fiance. As a matter of fact, the first time I heard him call me his wife to another person was when you and Joel showed up at our door.” She spoke in a roller coaster of tones, switching between enthusiastic and disappointed. “So I want you to have something special to commemorate this moment with. It’s not going to be a big, fancy wedding, but something nice nonetheless.” She said to you.

“Thank you.” You replied.

“Ohhh, look at this dress! I think this would go great with your figure, honey.” Darlene stated as she handed you the opened magazine. You admitted it was nice, but you couldn't see yourself in it. 

“That’s a bit plain, don’t you think? How about this one.” Maria handed you her magazine. The dress was exceptionally grand. It had a train and was adorned with crystals and lace.

“That’s quite the dress, Maria.” You commented, not wanting to hurt her feelings.

“But do you like it?” She asked.

“I do,” It wasn’t a whole lie. “But what’s the point in looking at dresses? I’m not gonna be wearing any of them from these magazines. I don’t own any white dresses at all. Just a white t shirt with sweat stains and holes in ‘em.”

“It doesn’t hurt to fantasize a little bit. Besides, maybe we’ll go out and find a store with something nice to wear inside.” She replied. 

“Drink up, honey, you're supposed to be happy.” Darlene said as she watched you nurse your glass.

“I am happy.” You replied with a straight face.

“Let’s play This or That and let’s pretend it was 13 years ago and the world was normal again. I’ll ask you to choose between two different things, wedding themed of course. I want you to give me an answer quickly to ensure it’s the truest answer.” Maria suggested.

“What were you doing 13 years ago?” Darlene asked you.

“Just graduated college. Didn’t even get a chance to apply my degree anywhere.”

“Oh, you were just a youngin’. Still had milk ‘hind your ears.” She playfully slapped your thigh. “And let’s see...Joel must have been how old…” She pondered seriously.

“Vanilla or chocolate?” Maria spoke up.

“What?” You asked.

“Cake. Vanilla or chocolate for your wedding cake?”

“Uh, chocolate.”

“Outdoor or indoor venue?”

“Indoor, I guess.”

“DJ or band?”

“DJ?”

“Lillies or Peonies for your bouquet?”

“I don’t think I know what peonies look like, to be honest.”

For the rest of the night, you and the other women played wedding themed games that you were sure Maria made up. They fiddled with your hair and dabbed beet juice on your lips and cheeks to appear as makeup. Despite Darlene rubbing you the wrong way, you took her advice and ‘drunk up’. Getting loose helped, but it still was all a bit overwhelming to you. Part of you wanted the fairytale like Maria said, but part of you didn’t even want it at all. While a fairytale would look nice, it would come with too many cons and then you would think ‘what was the point’. There would be too many people, and as an introvert, you weren’t prepared for that. Having to coordinate a large amount of food to feed the party, acquire a form of entertainment to keep everyone busy, ceremony rehearsals, picking loyalties when choosing between your sister in law and your good friend for made of honor and so on. Honestly none of your female friends were as close to you as Jesse, though, but you didn’t think he nor Joel would be cool with him being your main bridesmaid. 

Still buzzed, you walked into your empty house and beelined it to the bathroom. You sat at the edge of the tub, warm water running through your fingers as you watched it fill up. You grabbed your portable CD player and headphones out the drawer next to the toilet. You adjusted yourself into the inviting bath and immediately slipped your head under the surface. Being underwater was always a relaxing feeling for you so long as you knew you were in control. Your hands held onto the sides of the tub, keeping you under. You stayed there with your eyes closed until you couldn’t take it anymore. The curls of your hair laid flat against your head as you took in a large breath. As weird as it was, it helped the anxiety that you were currently harboring. The cherry on top was your music. You reached over the edge and felt for the play button before sliding the headphones over your ears. Again, you closed your eyes. You weren’t thinking about anything in particular: your patrol duty tomorrow morning, your promise to have lunch with Maria and Darlene, and sure as hell not your wedding. 

The buzz was wearing off, but the warm water took over the job and continued to relax your muscles. You were three songs into the album you were listening to when they abruptly tensed up. Your eyes popped open at the sudden splash of water that landed on your chest. It felt as though only a moment ago you were alone in the world and now sitting on the edge of the tub is Joel. He watched as you scooted up, sloshing the water around. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to splash you that hard.” He chuckled before pointing to your CD player. “You gotta be careful with this, (Y/N), you know. Gotta have your wits about you even in a place like Jackson---”

“I know, I just wanted to unwind for a moment---” You butted in.

“I don’t mean to chastise you like you’re a child, but I just want you to be safe. What if it wasn’t me here.”

“All the doors are locked.” You reasoned.

“Still.” He gave you his famous glare for a solid moment before his eyes drifted down to your body in the water. “Room for one more?” He lifted his eyebrow.

You frowned. “I was about to get out.”

“Didn’t look like that to me, darlin’. If I’d chosen to watch you for longer, you’d still be laying there with your eyes closed.”

“How long were you watching me for?” You asked, starting to feel a mix of self consciousness and arousal.

“Doesn’t matter.” Joel’s face was rid of emotion save from his eyes. His eyes were lit up with lust despite your rejection.

“The water was getting cold. I was just waiting for the song to end before getting out.”

He lifted the same eyebrow. “Is that so?” His eyes followed your body as you stood up in the tub. He unfolded his arms and grabbed the towel on the back of the door. Holding it out, you stepped out of the tub and into the soft fabric. He slid his hands up your arms before massaging your shoulders. His hands were rough and ungentle, but you still let him continue. “Baby, tell me what’s wrong. Who hurt you? I’ll go grab Tommy’s bat and smash their kneecaps in.”

You chuckled. “While I’m sure you would,” You turned around, releasing your shoulders from his grip. “No one hurt me. I’m just...I just got some stuff on my mind.”

“Care to share?” He asked. You shrugged. “Was it something that happened at Maria’s?”

“She threw me a bridal shower.”

He sat on the toilet and pulled you down onto his lap. “That was nice of her.”

“I mean yeah, it was nice. It just...It felt forced. Women were there that I hardly knew. We were planning the wedding, imagining details I knew would never work. I feel like Maria wants this to happen more than I do and I hate that. I should want this the most. I mean I do want this,” You point between you and him. “But I just don’t know how I want to go about it. I thought seeing her again would help me make up my mind about things, but I feel just as confused and flustered.”

He kissed your shoulder. “I don’t want you to stress out over this. It’ll all work out, because the most important thing in the end is that we have each other. I promise,” He kissed your shoulder again. “Ok?” He waited for you to say it back before tapping your thigh. “Now, just because you didn’t want me to get in with you doesn’t mean I don’t want a nice, relaxing bath too. Last chance before you put your clothes on.” He pointed between you, him and the tub as if asking for you to join him. 

You smile with a shake of your head. “No, my skin is all wrinkly but I promise to only keep the towel on if you promise not to make me wait long.” You winked at him. 

[romanticrising]

Unconditionally (Thinking of You Part 2)// JJ Maybank x Reader

Read Part 1 here

Summary: basically just a continuation of part 1

Requests are open so ask away

Warnings: Smut (wrap it before you tap it; birth control doesn’t prevent STDs), smoking weed, swearing

Several days passed after my early morning rendezvous on the beach with JJ. I wrestled back and forth with my better judgement, trying to convince myself that telling Michael wouldn’t be a good idea. In the end, I realized it didn’t matter how he took it because either way our relationship had to end. It would always be JJ. He was my better half in every single way. Where I was too cautious, he was carefree and impulsive, occasionally to a fault, but that was what I loved about him. Come to think of it, there wasn’t a single thing I didn’t love about JJ.

The morning after I called it off with Michael— technically, it was mutual but I digress— I went by JJ’s place. He gave me a cold shoulder for a bit while I followed him around, trying to apologize, before finally agreeing to let me take him out into the marsh on the HMS Pogue. I dropped the anchor in our old favorite spot and lit up a blunt while he pretended to ignore me. I sat down beside him and held it out to him as a peace offering. He took it after a moment and sighed, letting the smoke curl out of his lips. 

“JJ, I’m sorry,” I said.

“You said that already,” he said off-handedly. I looked over at him. His head was thrown back, his lips slightly parted, joint hanging loosely from his fingertips.

“I shouldn’t have left. Everything was telling me to stay, but I—”

“Why?”

It was the first time he’d looked directly at me since I’d gotten to his place that morning. “Why what?”

“Why did you leave me? Do you know how shitty that feels? I haven’t thought about anything but you since we broke up and after everything on the beach I thought you’d finally come back. And then you left me. Even I stick around for a bit after I fuck a tourist. That was low.”

I reached for his hand but he pulled it away, scoffing. “I shouldn’t have left.” I repeated. I didn’t know what to say.

“Yeah, I know. You’ve told me all morning how sorry you are.”

“JJ, I don’t know how to convince you how sorry I am. I haven’t slept since then. I—”

He interrupted me again. “Are you still dating that Kook?”

I sputtered, lost for words. “No, we broke up.”

“When?”

“Yesterday.”

“Wow, so I’m your rebound.”

“No, I’ve been trying to tell you: we broke up because I finally grew a pair and realized I love you. We broke up because I’ll only ever love you and it was pointless for me to be with anyone else.”

“Too little, too late.” He stood to leave. I jumped to my feet and grabbed his hand. 

“Please. How do I prove it to you? JJ, it’s only ever been you. Since before I can remember, it’s been you and me, best friends until we were more. I’m sorry I left you on the beach; I should have stayed. Hindsight is 20/20, right? Well I know that now.

“Remember when we snuck out of my house and took the boat out here, and we got super high and you finally told me you liked me? That was the best day of my life. You were all of my firsts: first kiss, first time, first love, first heartbreak. You were the first person to not laugh at me for crying at Finding Nemo, and yes, that’s stupid but I remember it. I remember it because it was you. Do you know how many guys asked me to the dance in middle school? At least three, and I rejected them all because I only wanted you to take me. And then you asked that stupid girl— I forget her name— and I cried so hard I ran out of tears and it took John B showing up with flowers and a chocolate cupcake to convince me to go.”

JJ stared at me for a second. “You remember that?”

“Of course I remember that! JJ, I’ve loved you for the better part of my life. I’m sorry. For everything. For letting my mom shit talk you the way she did that time, and for getting so mad at you when—”

“Shut up,” JJ moved forward, cupping my face in both his hands. He captured my lips with his, moving his mouth against mine with practiced ease. It was like everything that had ever been wrong was fixed. Stars could collide and set the world on fire and we would never know it. We were alone in our world, complete in each other like we’d never been before. I kissed him back like I’d lose him if I didn’t. He held me tightly against him, one hand fisted in my hair, the other resting on my lower back under my shirt. Our weed had fallen to the floor somewhere, forgotten. I couldn’t bare to let him break the kiss, but even still we realized at some point we would need air and pulled away. 

He rested his forehead against mine, breathing heavily. I could taste the marijuana smoke on his breath. His eyes were still closed and it took him a moment to open them.

“You wanna know what I remember?” His voice was raspy and stirred something in my chest I’d only ever felt with him. I slowly ran my hands through his hair, pulling his mouth down so it was mere inches from mine. He made a sound between a growl and a moan and kissed me hungrily. After a moment, when kissing started to lead to more, we broke apart. 

“What do you remember?” I asked.

“I remember when you showed up to that stupid middle school dance with John B, in your favorite blue jeans and your dad’s old shirt with the tear in the side from when we got stuck in the bushes running from the cops. I knew you’d been crying, but John B had helped you put on some lip gloss and fix your hair and you looked so beautiful I felt stupid for not asking you instead.”

I struggled to regain focus as ran his thumb over my bottom lip. My lips parted involuntary at his action and he watched me through half-lidded eyes as I followed the motion of his fingers.

“Why didn’t you ask me?”

“Because I was worried if I did you’d figure out I liked you.” We kissed again, this time slow and passionate. His lips tasted better than any candy I’d ever known. My heart pounded as if it was trying to burst out of my chest and join with his. He pressed his body closer to mine so we were flush against each other. All I could feel was him. 

We parted all too soon and he sat down at the front of the boat on the cushions there. I sunk down next to him, curling myself into his side as he wrapped his arm around me.

“I’m still mad at you for leaving me,” he murmured, kissing the back of my hand. I swung my legs around so they laid across his lap and leaned up to kiss him. I couldn’t get enough of him. Something felt different between us now. Our love had always felt timeless but now we felt mature, like we’d weathered a hundred storms. I guess that’s what happens when you’re meant to be with someone. You’re like the rigged games at a fair: as many times as you knock one of those pegs down, they still keep coming back up. 

“I’m very sorry,” I said, puckering my lips teasingly and closing my eyes while he tilted my head up toward him.

He chuckled, pecking my lips. “I’m only going to forgive you because I love you.”

I smiled, staring into his eyes. God, I could drown in those baby blues. “I love you too.”

Clutching at his waist, I pulled him closer to me and kissed him hard, wishing my lips could convey how much I’d missed him and how much I loved him. Words could only do so much. 

When I pulled on the hem of his T-shirt, he got the message and tugged it off over his head. I reconnected our lips as soon as his shirt was off, running my hands down his chest. I moved my legs again, this time to straddle his lap and roll my hips down onto his already hardening erection. He mumbled something against my lips and I paused, pulling away from him.

“You won’t leave me again, will you?” I glimpsed a rare flicker of vulnerability in JJ’s eyes when he asked that question. It made my chest clench and that familiar pit in my stomach threaten to swallow me. I hated knowing that I’d hurt him. 

“Never,” I promised. “It’s you and me, as long as you want me.”

“I hope you’re okay with forever then.” An elated laugh burst from my lips and JJ’s face lit up in a smile. “Now strip.” His tone went from happy to dominating in a matter of seconds and my skin tingled where he touched me. I obeyed, pulling my shirt off to reveal my bikini top, which he quickly untied while I tossed my shirt aside. His hands were rough on the sensitive skin of my breasts and I couldn’t help but let out a wanton moan. I felt my arousal pool in my bathing suit bottoms so I took his hand and brought it down between my legs. He got the message and started rubbing my clit through my shorts. I dug my nails into his skin, clutching his shoulder with one hand while my other hand moved up the back of his head and entangled itself in his hair.

I couldn’t tell where JJ’s body ended and mine began by the time we were both naked. He helped me lay down on a towel we’d spread out earlier, kissing me gently. Missionary wasn’t either of ours favorite positions, but he wanted to look at me right now. We agreed that other positions could wait until next time. After all, we’d have all the time in the world now that we were together again.

He entered me with a groan after teasing my fold with his tip until I cursed at him and told him just to fuck me already. He didn’t waste any time giving me a moment to adjust and set a rough pace that had me wrapping my legs around his waist to pull him deeper. I moaned his name loudly arching my back and grabbing at the towel beneath me to have something to hold onto. He adjusted his angle, lifting my leg up and making me scream out as he hit my G-spot. My body hummed with pleasure as I felt myself nearing my orgasm and my breaths came in ragged gasps interspersed with moans of his name.

“JJ, I’m close,” I moaned, nearly losing myself in the rhythm of his thrusts.

“Hold on, baby,” he grunted, leaning closer to me and entwining my hand with his above my head. My free hand found its way to his hair once again and I pulled on his messy blonde hair, bringing his lips down to mine. I came a moment later, moaning against his lips. He groaned as my walls tightened around him and reached his orgasm a moment later, thrusting erratically as we came down from our highs. I kissed him again as he pulled me up to sit on his lap. He kissed along my neck and shoulders, leaving hickeys on my skin. I shivered as a breeze blew across the boat. Ever the gentleman, JJ cleaned me off and helped me back into my bathing suit. He gave me his shirt and I put that on over my bikini, loving the way it smelled like him. 

I rolled up the towel and got rid of the weed we’d forgotten about earlier while he pulled up the anchor and started the boat. He wrapped his arm around me while we cruised back through the marsh, keeping me close to his side. Every few minutes he would ease up on the throttle and lean over to catch my lips in a kiss.

“Hey, baby?” I asked.

He hummed in response.

“I love you. And I’m sorry. For everything.”

“Just don’t do it again,” he remarked. There was a moment of pause. Then, “I love you too, dumbass. I expect I will for a long time.”

“Unconditionally?”

“Unconditionally.”