#rdo update

[honeyvanity]

wtf do i even do with my life now

[tazcreates]

I haven't seen very many mens outfits for rdo on the internet for I'm gonna post a couple that I made here :]

I usually try to match some of my outfits to my horses (eg, the red being the chestnut turkomen and the darker colours for dark bay shire), but I might start making other ones for shits and giggles. I think my character would look decent in a blue, or teal.

But here! These are the custom outfits I have for my character. My favourites are the 1st, 3rd, 4th, and 6th.

I meant to add what clothing items you need on this post, but I logged out and forgot to write it all down. If y'all want like, a tutorial or list of things, lmk and I can post it for you :]

ALSO!! If you have any outfits you want to share (femme/masc/andro) for Red Dead Online, please share!!

Thank you!

[vanderlindepounder]

guy that teleports the rdo lobby into the middle of the ocean + kills you with lightning I Love My Red Dead Redemption OC

blank + credit under cutttttttttt mwah mwah mwah

[cutemothman]

one time i was on a mission on rdo with some randos and we were supposed to mount our horses to start the mission and i accidentally pressed the wrong button and punched my fucking horse. so all a bunch of internet strangers saw was me running up to my horse and full on punching it in the butt. my friends still call me horse puncher. you punch ONE horse and suddenly you're a horse puncher for life

[arthurmargon]

rdr3 confirmed(?) but not for at least a decade why does rockstar hate women

[ariseur]

How do you think Arthur Morgan would react to a reader who has a great connection with animals? The reader knows how to calm animals, from horses to pigs and chickens, she also ensures that the animals have a good food and she will always be seen with a cat or a dog in her arms.

animal whisperer 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

arthur morgan x reader

┊ ˚➶ notes ｡˚ 🎼

this request was sooo cute!! sorry it took me a little while to complete it, i’ve been working on like fifteen different drafts at once !! 💗

┊ ˚➶ warnings ｡˚ 🎼

mentions of animals ( dogs, cats, horses ), mentions of arthur getting bucked off of his horse 😭, intended lowercase, lmk if i missed anything!!

. ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄

❥ let me start this off by saying that i think arthur would literally adore you and your presence. like, he already thinks you’re such a beautiful lady and that you’re amazing within your own, but seeing you so domestic with animals does something to him.

❥ arthur’s lived a hard life, he’s calloused and struggles with letting himself enjoy some of the nicer moments in life alone. but when he finds you, it feels like all of the toughness that everybody sees melts away. all he wants is you, and now that’s he’s experienced the feeling of you, he never wants to let that go

❥ if you have a more curt and blunt nature to yourself, but you just melt around animals? oh, man— he’ll do anything to see that side of you. whenever it slips out and he sees you care so much for the horses or actually supply them with hay bales and proper necessities, his eyes will always follow you curiously

❥ and even if you’re a super sweet and outwardly kind person, he’ll still adore you!! he thinks it’s cute how you care so much for animals even if he wont say it to you, he has a fondness for animals too— except it’s more so updating his compendium and hunting them rather than taking them under his wing and feeding them 😭

❥ if you have a dog, he will love that baby to death let me tell you. doesn’t matter if they’re mangy or a mutt or even purebred, he will love them regardless. if we’re going based off what dogs you can get in rdo, i think he’d get along with a chill bigger dog— but even if your dog was energetic or more on guard like a chesapeake bay retriever or a labrador retriever, he will still adore them. i can just imagine arthur with a little guard dog by his side walking through camp as it follows him everywhere. having a dog will probably make him remember his old dog copper as he tells you tales of his journeys with him at night while rubbing your dog behind the ear as it lays its head on his lap.

❥ arthur’s not really a cat person but he won’t mind if you have one!! cats are very independent and he understands that so he’ll give them their space until one day they just like.. drape themselves over his lap and he has no idea what to do. he feels bad if he stands up but like.. he doesn’t know what else to do 😭

❥ and while i’m writing this i’m thinking of how in the game, micah would literally kick the crap out of cain in rdr2 and would scold him for no reason :(((. let me just say that arthur would literally not stand for that ( and yes i only write for high honor arthur, but i feel like regardless of his honor he wouldn’t be okay with it either way ). also why am i imagining micah getting bit or scratched and arthur just like laughing at him— like even him and your animal share a look because do you see this utter buffoonery? micah’s more of an animal than anyone if we’re being honest

❥ if you don’t like seeing him hunt or watching him skin animals, then he’ll suggest you turn away or he’ll point out something in the distance ( probably another cute animal prancing around or something ), and if it’s something small like a rabbit or a bird then it’ll be done in no time and he’ll redirect your attention back to him, jumping back on his horse and saying you guys should continue on with your journey

❥ if you need him to stop by to get any necessities or food for the animals at camp, he’ll stop by on his way back and get them the proper things they need. if you thank him, he’ll just brush it off and say it’s no problem— ( he was like two counties away but he’d gladly go back if you needed him to do so ).

❥ in summary, i feel like arthur would do really great with a partner with pets or a love for animals in general. he doesn’t get the fascination too much but he’ll support you nonetheless, as long as you don’t get hurt trying to pet something that looks cute when it’s not lmfao.

❥ holy crap i need jelp whyisa rthjrorhajgan so fne

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈ ｡ﾟ

“shh.. calm down, boy.” with your hands held out cautiously, you slowly approached ARTHUR’s bucking horse— the tennessee walker’s chestnut coat glimmering in the sun as it shone on its back. its alarmed neighs filled the air with only the distant rushing of water to accompany it, along with arthur’s huffs behind you as he caught his breath.

“‘s alright.” you cooed at the horse, waiting until its breaths slowed down slightly before you moved closer. your arms slowly extended out to reach his snout, his eyes widened and looking everywhere but you. you softly shushed as you halted your movements. your hand hovered over the white of his proboscis before finally placing a gentle hand on its nose, feeling its heavy breathing upon your arm.

“i still dont— fff.. get how you.. do ‘at.” arthur wheezed, bent over with his knees supporting him as he placed firm hands on them. he let out a breathy laugh, tipping his head up so you could catch a glimpse of his eyes under the brim of his hat. “i dunno what he even gotten spooked over.” he shook his head, watching as you pulled out a small carrot from your pocket and carefully fed it to his horse who munched on it in delight.

you didn’t pay him a glance as you were enveloped in the tenessee walker instead, smiling as you replied, “probably just somethin’ in the grass.”

“fair ‘nuff.” he shrugged, brushing himself off before placing a hand on his back while he winced. arthur sucked some air between clenched teeth as he struggled to stand upright. “think he got somethin’ in my back, too.” with a string of muttered curses, he hunched over once again.

your head turned this time, still focused on giving small pats to the horse’s nose as you tilted your head. brows furrowed, you asked, “need me to get you something from outta town?”

“naw, ‘s fine—“

“arthur, i was heading out that way already,” you pointed a thumb behind you— leading his vision to your horse stationary in the distance, tapping its hooves against the ground as it waited. he looked back at you as you held a gentle smile on your face and continued, “i don’t mind stoppin’ for something.”

arthur sighed, his fingers still kneading his lower back as he let out an occasional groan.

he let the silence take hold on the situation for a second, contemplating his options. letting his fingers twist and grab at the grass beneath him— his eyes flickered between the two horses, and then finally back to you. realizing it wouldn’t make a difference and you’d probably get it anyway, he waved a dismissive hand around and finally nodded his head.

“yeah, sure.”

��� taglist ; @maskedteaser

[roamingtigress]

Vandermatthews Headcanons - updated!

-They have a nightly bedtime reading; they'll discuss what's going on in each chapter and will read paragraphs to each other; sometimes this on well into late night

-Neither of them can tolerate cold well, particularly Hosea, and a fire on every night; Dutch will spoon him to further keep him warm (I've made mentions of them not tolerating the cold as well as they did when they were younger but didn't touch too much onto them)

-Dutch is very ticklish! Particularly his ribs/belly/waist, and Hosea will tickle him in public (or 'threaten' to) when he flirts in public or is moody or general PiTA. He does his stoic face but eventually, he'll crumble. Unfortunately for him, Hosea isn't so much to keep him further (I realize I'm sharing trade secrets here, no regrets, do what you want with them, mwah <3)

-Since their bed was made only for one person, they are 'forced' to lay on top of each other (and can also be found laying by the bonfire), usually, Hosea lays on Dutch but doesn't always go that way.

-Wolves wait to pounce the moment Dutch steps out because of their attraction to his hair pomade, and the 30 pieces of beef, 10 fish, 20 squirrels stuffed in his pockets because he doesn't have a satchel.

-Reverend Swanson got them married <3

-Hosea loves his back being rubbed, sides massaged, waist being held in those hold-you-close hugs and shoulders rubbed (this whole area will get him to melt like butter) and has a spot between his ear and jawline that when touched, gets him to his happy spot, but he's a happy chappy wherever Dutch touches him (but I need to touch upon this more!)

-Dutch loves chest rubs, belly rubs, and there's a spot on his right hip that makes him squirm; he also loves to have his jaw/chin scratched and especially that cleft of his chin that he used to feel self-conscious about; scritching him here will elicit big manly little purry sounds from him * (though I have yet to get into the chin/jaw scritches in my story; it's in my head waiting to get out); he also likes to have his mustache/soul patch touched

-They love a bit of roleplay; they'll create scenarios where they'll be acting out their first (I've made a post where Hosea is a bartender and Dutch is seeking a job as a musician there)

-They take turns in deciding on a quiet place to read. Heartlands Overflow was their latest spot. They'll also do a spot of readin' at the camp, too).

-Hosea can't stomach warm beer, Dutch will drink it cold or warm

-Dutch is the RDO equivalent of Jane Goodall; he'll happily socialize with other people's characters, and will also observe their goings-on (in a quiet spot if a quiet spot exists L) among them and reports on what he sees back at camp to get a better understanding of this strange world

-Dutch's favourite feature on Hosea is his eyes, hands and fingers and he tries to make eye contact with him as much as possible; he loves to hold and kiss his hands, and of course, be touched with them as much as possible; he also cannot leave his chest alone (so that's another favourite) and has a thing about hearing his heartbeat at night on those nights he lays on top of him, so maybe it's his heart that is his #1 <3 (but imo whole man is his favourite part)

-Among Hosea's favourite features on Dutch? His nose; he loves grabbing it, and kissing it, as well as his silly waist and the slight belly he's gotten from being looked after so well by him, and of cannot resist those locks that he can't resist touching.

-Dutch's favourite role is the Bounty Role because of the PEW PEW that's often involved but tied with Moonshine; he loves dancing like a fool and playing with the band, and the excitement of running 'shine like a proper degenerate; also loves the excitement of what the Trader Role can bring on hose trading run and now gets along with Cripps (they were ornery and antagonistic at the start until they learned they'll have mutual benefits from working with each other)

-Hosea's favourite role is the Collector role; it's generally the least problematic role between them both (and prob the most old-man-friendly activity) and they have an extensive selection of things they picked up (Hosea has issues with giving up the items they've collected); they also turn Collecting into a date and will often dress up more for this role than the others

-Hosea's favourite horse is his Turkoman stallion, Silver Dollar, but he has a bit of a fondness for Morgans, Standardbreds (particularly buckskin) and Belgian Drafts and will steal one if given the opportunity

-Dutch's favourites? His little princess pony Arabian, The Count. He makes me feel like he's bigger than he is. Others include Legend the dun Mustang mare, Sienna the black Kladruber mare who makes him feel fancy.

-Whenever Hosea is really angry at Dutch (which doesn't happen too often and when he does he doesn't stay mad at him for long); he gives him a wide berth (might be canon?), he's which is so difficult because he's clingy and needy but will not cross that invisible barrier (I want to write a chapter on this but trying to think of something that would create this scenario; there will be of course a cavity-inducing reunion)

-Dutch loves kissing Hosea in public; doesn't matter if it's in Smith's Saloon or wherever he'll just give that old man a big ol smooch on the lips (Hosea secretly loves it though he'll at times act embarrassed but doesn't exactly push away from it)

-Dutch is big into using the star/sun/moon as directional compasses; but doesn't always follow a waypoint; it seems to be in his coding but in my head he's just pigheaded about them and views them as a mere suggestion, which has gotten him, Hosea and his boys into trouble *

-Hosea is sometimes exasperated by his husband's neediness and clinginess and needs to reassure him when he does need to get some breathing space; he respects this and will go off on little misadventures with their sons or on his own, often winding up in some sort of trouble, often Valentine with his study subjects and buddies (I often don't bring Hosea around big groups of people esp in Valentine because of the potential of an incident but I have a feeling he's fine with that because Valentine is often just too chaotic for him), but always comes back and gives that idiot a big ol cuddle when he comes back

-Hosea CANNOT resist his husband's little gestures of appeasement; a hand squeeze, a kiss of his hand, tugging at his curls, and . . . Puppy eyes, which he weaponizes

-Hosea loves it when Dutch grabs his ass but always 'shoos' him and acts annoyed

-Dutch can't get enough ass grabbage and will pout if he doesn't get another squeeze

-Nose boops are a daily occurrence, including nose-to-boops which sometimes occasionally result in a bloody nose but are a bit safer than forehead boops which have more than occasion left Hosea seeing stars

-They really do do it on Fridays, for the most part (I keep them too busy to have too much intimate time, my bad)

-'Sea doesn't go on every bounty hunt (he takes this time to Collector inventory, general inventory, get some personal space (difficult to obtain at times LOL) and other odds and ends) but does go on every Collector, Trading and Moonshine run

-The boys don't visit Harriet often because someone keeps getting sprayed by her

-Both will gift each other with random, sometimes useless things; like I don't think Hosea really needs a donkey but Dutch will get him one anyway for a laugh and Hose would so say he doesn't need two asses (;D) (meaningful gifts are given aplenty too)

-Dutch doesn't like to be violent against other people's kids because he is careful; he'll tip his hat to the ladies and blow kisses to the guys (fuelling jealousy in Hoseea)

-One of those useless things? 'Sea has ordered an expensive mirror from France (that isn't too practical out on the range but there you go) because he gets a kick out of watching his hubby check himself out and then acting like he wasn't checking himself out in the mirror)

-Hosea has a dry sense of humour

-Dutch will laugh at his own jokes

-They both will feed each other bits of food on a fork <3

-Dutch is the little spoon; he feels safer ith Hosea curled up around him

-Nicknames? Hosea nicknames Dutch his Beautiful Idiot, Babygirl, the Mustached Idiot (and just idiot), Babygirl, Duchess; Dutch calls Hosea 'Sea in addition to Old Girl (he also calls him Silver Fox but have yet to include that in my fics; I'm thinking of more nicknames for him too!)

-Dutch despises ran but Hosea will take this time to wait it out with him and play with his hair

-Both are rather useless at the cowboy thing; one gets dragged through the mud, the other will go on a slaughter spree for being bumped.

-They are both deeply affectionate towards each other; kisses, hugs, cuddles, and touches aplenty are given to each other (they touch each other a lot in my stories; can't keep their hands off of each other)

-Dutch carries his tiny Hosea plush with him in his saddlebag whenever Dutch is off somewhere without Hosea (Hosea deserves a break now and then).

-On random Sundays, they make pancakes for breakfast in bed (whoever gets up first is the pancake maker). Always heart-shaped, though Dutch's attempts are endearingly sloppy.

-Hosea gave Dutch his gramophone for his birthday. He regrets his decision.

-Hosea hums while reading the newspaper

-Dutch will twirl his hair and kick his feet while reading.

-Dutch's most ticklish spot? His belly button!

-Hosea has a little heart-shaped birthmark on his right butt cheek.

-Dutch tugs at his hair when he's nervous (does it count as a headcanon if it's actually canon?)

--They are occasionally polyamorous; Josiah Trelawny is among those who they let into their tight circle.

[dalekofchaos]

The untapped potential of Undead Nightmare 2

I think of Undead Nightmare 2 and I scream at how Rockstar chose greed instead of creativity. And to make matters worse, they abandoned RDO and won't even import the fucking Navy Revolver into story mode.

Undead Nightmare was so much fun and RDR2 added so man possibilities. But no, instead of actually giving the fans what they want, we get trash.

Could you imagine an Undead Nightmare sequel in the atmosphere of RDR2? The night folk are scary enough, Imagine wandering around the swamp at night with zombies everywhere. It would feel like a genuine horror game.

Rockstar missed a MASSIVE opportunity by not making an undead nightmare DLC, imagine how incredible it would be with this games atmosphere. The game on its own can already be pretty terrifying when you wander around the swamp or deep forest at night or have encounters with gangs like the night folk and Murfree brood.

Imagine an outbreak of Vampires in Saint Denis and Blackwater. The rich and powerful are quite literally sucking the life out of the poor and working class.

Vampires in the south and Zombies in the west! And maybe some serial killers for good measure.

Voodoo Zombies in the Bayou

Werewolves in Tall Trees and around Pronghorn ranch area, maybe in that cave with the white cougar mission

Witches in Big Valley

Yeti and Sasquatches in the Grizzlies

Undead Del Lobo gunslingers in New Austin

Tumbleweed is actually haunted by ghosts with the Sherriff as a Poltergeist

And even Aliens in all areas of the frontier once the plague is taken care of.

Like first expansion

Undead Nightmare 2

Second expansion. Supernatural Frontier.

Third and final expansion. Cowboys & Aliens

Storywise. Arthur could either be saved by the vampire of Saint Denis or even abducted and cured by aliens and once Arthur wakes up, he sees the world plagued by monsters and decides to hunt them down, while also planning revenge on Dutch and Micah.

Arthur would not be alone. Charles, Sadie and John would be there to back him up

Imagine how brutal and satisfying it would be to mow down zombies with this games gore system, and how much fun it would be to hold out for as long as you can against endless hordes of zombies. The game also already contains mild survival elements so maybe they could also make it so eating is mandatory and you must scavenge/hunt to survive. Think of all of the cool side missions and random encounters they could add. They could even add zombie animals like in the first game, imagine fighting off zombie gators in the swamp or zombie bears in the woods.

This DLC could have been fucking insane, I guarantee it would have sold like crazy. Instead all we got was an online Wild West dress up and nature simulator, designed to take your money through micro transactions.

Like seriously….they could update it like every Halloween. Add something new each year.

Zombies

Vampires

Werewolves

Witches

Wendigo

Giants

Aliens

Stuff I just thought of. Everyone who turned bad could turn into a monster

Micah becomes a Werewolf lord

Javier becomes a El Chupacabra

Bill becomes a Wendigo

Dutch becomes a Vampire

and the final boss? The Strange Man.

Arthur could be like a Wild Western Van Helsing. Hunting the monsters down. Such wasted potential.

[goreyirl]

happy Halloween month everyone!🎃

RDO was updated yesterday for the Halloween pass. Once again it was pass 2,

but everyone who missed getting masks last year can grab them again!

can’t wait to see everyone’s Halloween inspired outfits this month!🧡👻

[star-spangled-bastard]

year 3 without a game update!! give it up for year 3 without a game update!

every year @lordgoopy and I have to come up with more and more absurd ways to "celebrate" the anniversary of the last real rdo update. We started with strip poker, last year was strip fishing, and this year was figuring out how to take a bath (finally)

[dutchs-paisley-vest]

📌Pinned Post📌

Updated on: 02/17/25

***I like and follow back from mothed-moss***

I’ve been in and out of this fandom for years and with my most recent RDR1 and RDR2 playthroughs, I have decided to add another blog under my belt.

This blog is NOT the place for ship discourse or the moralizing of people’s art. I am an adult with much better things to be doing than being argumentative on the internet.

I block blogs and blacklist tags freely to curate my own experience; it’s not personal, and I suggest you do the same.

I will literally reblog whatever, so if you don’t want to see certain stuff, just block me or the tag. I hold no hard feelings over pixels; it’s just a video game.

I will also occasionally reblog or post things with adult themes, so be fair-warned .

With all what being said, hi! I’ll answer to paisley, moth, or any variation of my url :] I play RDR1 on switch and RDR2/RDO on ps4 and would love to play with some folk sometime! I also think its fun to help out with levelling up if you're aiming for a particular goal Feel free to lmk/ask about it! I don’t bite, I promise!

Main tags/tagging system: I will tag the game, ship and characters applicable to each post/rb in addition, but not limited to the following:

#red dead meta <- meta posts/rbs

#paisley.txt <- my original posts/significant rbs, of any variety

#paisley replies <- ask replies, including submissions for ask games

#red dead photography / #video game photography <- my gameplay/photos

#red dead oc / #ernest o’connor <- my RDR/RDO OC

#other people's ocs <- what it says on the tin

DMs and Asks open, as always :]

Spotify Playlists:

Nothing Gets Forgiven (John Marston) A Noble Sacrifice (Dutch Van der Linde) The Unruly Son (Arthur Morgan) [Playlist Name Pending...] (Jack Marston)

The Company We Keep (Ernest O'Connor, RDO/RDR OC)

(Dividers from @deltamel here)

[senboago]

Long Time No See!

Let me post here to let people know I'm still alive. And that I miss you all.

Any update on my life? Not much. Had a job that mentally and physically exhausted me. Much as I loved it, and miss it every day, it definitely took too much of a toll on my mental health and kept me from a lot of hobbies and passions I had.

I've also started roleplaying through RedM (RDR2/RDO rp) and would love to introduce a few characters from there to here one day. Most notably Alice Klein (currently Hillberd in the server I'm in right now 'cause she married!) who I've had a pleasure in developing her story with the help of current rp partner (who plays Alice's husband).

One day I'll get myself to add her along with a few other RDR2 ocs.

Another small, but possibly major thing, is I may try to get back into streaming. We'll see how that goes.

Anyways! Lovely to see a lot of people on my dash and just thought I'd give a little mini update on what and how I'm doing!

[coltermorning]

bonnie macfarlane was such a joyful surprise wtf!!!!!!!!! i dont ever see anyone using her in their fanfics, let alone make them an asset to the story!!!!! ive been keeping up with the updates and i’m so excited for more!!!!

Thank you! I love Bonnie so much and was so glad to see her in rdo. Had to put her in there when the idea of the ranch worked its way into the story. Last part soon to come! 🧡

[muddyriveragricultural]

DEMO IN Goondiwindi with the HORSCH SPRINTER- REGISTER FOR TEXT UPDATES RDO Goondiwindi Brian Riddle +61 428 718 515 RDO Moree Geoff Hatton +61 417 896 103 RDO Shortline Manager Charlie Millard +61 418 827 311 Sprinter NT and Air Seeder Carts ▶ Tine seeder with up to 431 kg breakout ▶ Proven and reliable rubber torsion system ▶ 1 m under frame clearance ▶ Exceptional trash flow via three tine ranks and the addition of a set of in line cutting coulters ▶ Large bin capacities from 12,000 to 21,000 litres. 🟡 Contact Mark Tosswill +61 408 604 546

[getittogetherk]

February 9, 2025

sunday morning, 8:06 a.m.

feeling pretty okay.

things have been fine, fairly uneventful after the first few awful weeks of january. the fire danger has settled down, and we've had a few days of light rain in the past couple weeks, which has been nice. the devastation and fear of just a few weeks ago is almost just a dim memory (for me, although i'm very aware that it is still very present for others).

today feels ok. it was an RDO weekend and i was able to do a few things i needed to do, but also rest some. on friday i went to get some blood drawn, and then spent a full 3 hours at mazda buying my mazda cx5. it was fairly straightforward yet somehow took a lot longer than i had anticipated. i naively thought that since i already had the car picked out, and cash and credit in hand, and the price locked down, i'd be out within an hour, but alas i was very wrong.

so friday was oddly exhausting even though it was mostly a lot of sitting.

saturday i got up for a zoom vbas meeting, and i think i ate some pasta, but not having my coffee, i was sleepy all day and then intermittently napped for what felt like hours (unfortunately my fitbit wasn't working and so did not log my sleep). so the whole day was spent lying around, staring at my phone, half watching Suits, and then eventually taking a shower because i could feel myself getting the exact kind of sick i feel when i don't shower. in addition to just my hair feeling greasy, i feel very cold and can't warm up, and then i also get an awful headache. so finally i took my shower, took a tylenol, then went to bed and fell asleep to youtube reviews of movies i didn't watch and would never watch, for some reason, just to hear the analysis of why a movie didn't work. i suppose it's a slight improvement from police cam videos, but now it's mostly review of bad movies, why meghan markle is awful, and in general the downfall of this and that youtube/viral sensation. i want to get back in the habit of watching healthy, affirming, productive things, like minimalism and self-help. how to get out of ruts. how to actually achieve one's dreams. although i also know in a very real way that the first step is to not watch youtube about it.

i think one thing i will do is limit the amount of screen time i have, and so that when i'm sort of "running out of time", I am forced to do something other than stare at my phone. so if i give myself 6 hours a day, which though is really high, is still less than the 8 hours a day average of last week. and i think i can spend that time cleaning, or kind of just some sort of maintenance: gardening, de-cluttering, both physical and digital, reading the car manual for the cx5, researching prices on camera equipment so i can get ride of the two large bags of camera equipment that have been sitting in my bedroom for months, etc. there is a lot i can do. i can also probably volunteer at the shelter more as i haven't been now for two consecutive weeks. i mean, there's a lot i can do if i get back 1-2 hours of my day. and i don't even really want to think about what i would do if i got back 3-4 hours of my day. i mean, ok so i hadn't really thought about it. but that's 3-4 hours of exercise, of clean eating and new recipes and meal prep, of probably a couple books a week, etc. i could really transform with that much more time dedicated to productivity.

oh another update i should include. a couple weeks ago my psychiatrist finally listened when i told her about the constant physical anxiety in my body. the inability to relax my shoulders. the clenching of my jaw. and she upped my lexapro 10 mg from 20 to 30 mg saying that it would work on my anxiety. for the first couple weeks i found myself craving sweets and carbs (although this could be attributed to other things), but even worse, my sleep became awful. i would wake up several times a night, and go to the restroom a few times a night, and i'd have single digit REM percentages. but starting from just 2-3 nights ago, i've felt a noticeable improvement. i feel more rested when i wake up. i feel less anxious and a dash more peaceful. i'm hoping this means that it's working.

i always forget how much i enjoy this particular activity. it is light out. the sun is shining, dimly, diffused by the big ass oak tree out front. there is a slight whir of traffic and the chirping of birds. the coffee is good. i feel myself slowly emptying out onto the words on the screen. i feel like this would be a part of a "perfect day" for me. good coffee, journaling while looking out at some nice scenery. a brisk walk or hike. i think some conversation would be nice. and then some productivity. i think that's why some vacations feel ... incomplete to me. i know i shouldn't need to feel productive, but sometimes i do. and when i'm home i can work on certain things, better my personal environment, focus on health, etc., but when i'm out, especially abroad, it's just eating out and no real exercise besides strenuous urban walking. i wish there was a way that i could appreciate everyday life everyday, and new experiences when i'm out. instead of neither.

[kamassa-river]

I played the new telegram missions not really expecting much given that the last batch we got was an utter mess i played once and never looked at again but man they are so fucking bad lmao.

First off they all just have you walking in a circle for a painfully long time (espescially the hunting one). It's either "get on your horse and ride over here, get off your horse and beat up some people" or "follow this npc over here, beat up some people", rinse and repeat X amount of times. Now, you could argue that most rdo missions were already like this, just more well hidden, and you'd be right, but normally there's a layer of ...idk what the right word is. Immersion? There's enough thought put into distracting you from the fact that all you're really doing is going from point A to point B and then shooting a couple of enemies that it, well, works. Simply put. But when it's done in utter silence, interrupted only by some chopped up voicelines already in the game, it doesnt. At all.

Second, (and this goes for most of the telegram missions) you dont get to choose the difficulty, there is absolutely no indication that your aim assist will be completely turned off even on standard difficulty, aka your first attempt, and you dont get to choose if you wanna play solo or matchmake, so you either a) end up with randoms who rush through the mission or b) play alone against a now ridiculous amount of poorly programmed enemies. It's the same thing as the pvp modes being on a fucking schedule and stranger missions paying more the longer you take - backwards in the most annoying ways possible.

This on top of Rockstar removing posse and horse names in an "update" (only you can see you horse name now, other players just see the breed) and the game still getting glitchier each time i log on.. it's just insulting honestly.

And let's talk about the actual missions. Look at this.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN??

This is from the "protect the do-gooder" or whatever it was called (it's really that memorable) and like?? I was genuinely so confused as to what just happened when i played this but apparently she's getting kidnapped. Mind you, we're not forced to go down here - the driver takes her here for some reason (i guess she's meant to be helping the poor?? that's my best guess as she was giving money to beggars earlier but we also went to the saloon and then got her mail for her so idk man) and she gets out and walks out on the dock by her own volition. We then go and save her in thieves landing but dont actually take her to where she was originally going. It just ends there. But i think most people just want this shit to be over at that point so it's probably for the best.

It's crazy to me that this exists alongside rdr2's story mode. Sure, rdo has never been and never will be at that same level of storytelling but compare this to Land of Opportunities or Life of 'Shine. Those still had some heart. There was at least some thought and care put into them. Even the first few telegrams we got had potential. I remember really enjoying the one where you're in Saint Denis trying to find your target and the only clue you get is that he wears a tophat and striped vest. It was creative if nothing else. This is just "There's guys for you to shoot, what more do you want? Oh, why is there no dialouge? Oh- Yeah, um, so the budget for this was actually nothing. Yeah. It was actually an exercise for our new intern. Was it his first day? Yes. Yes it was. And we obviously didnt record any new voicelines for this so, uh, you kinda just have to imagine there's a plot for this one. I think it's kinda charming that it's like charades and you have to guess what's going on. Or- Oh! A silent film! We did add the Halloween pass 2 back for the fourth year in a row, though. That's exciting, right?"