#rami malek angst

[writing-fanics]

Josh Washington x Reader

[summary: josh is going through it.]

[warning: angst: death: blood]

Notes: italics are flash backs

Josh cradled your body in his arms, gently tucking strands of hair behind your ear. He delicately held your head in his hands, kissing your forehead, which no longer held its warmth. His thumb gently caressed your cheek, brushing against the bloodstain on the corner of your mouth.

You looked so relaxed and peaceful despite the gaping hole in your stomach. Your lips were parted remnants of your last breath.

He reached down to hold your hand, taking it into his own. Intertwining his fingers with your now deathly cold ones. He brought it to his cheek leaning into your touch. His whimpers echoing throughout the cave; he hated isolation, he hated being alone.

He wasn't alone, though. You were just taking a nap and would wake up any minute. He would apologize for his prank and everything he had done.

You would go back to your apartment and see your cat again. He would wake up beside you, wrap his arms around you, and cuddle before getting up for the day.

You were his light in that darkness his world. His everything. He remembered how you held him in his arms, during the first few months after Hannah and Beth’s disappearence. Your fingers running through his hair, as you hummed while he cried in your chest.

“You are my sunshine.”

“My only sunshine”

“You make me happy” You kissed his forehead, he looked up at you. Revealing your tearful smile as you comforted your boyfriend.

Josh stared blankly at the ground as he cradled you, unable to come to terms that you were truly gone.“When skies are grey” choking back a sob as he nuzzled his head into your chest.

“Y-ou'll never know, dear” You cupped his face in your hands, as you wiped away his tears. And leaned your forehead against his. “How much I love you.” You smiled, putting your arms around him.

Josh's tears dampened the fabric of your shirt as he buried his face in your chest, his breathing ragged and shallow.

"So please don't take," he pleaded, his arms holding you tightly, as if he was afraid you would vanish if he let go. His grip on the back of your head was desperate, his whole body trembling with emotion.

"My sunshine away," Josh sniffled as he cradled you in his arms, rocking you back and forth while your hand lay limp at your side.

[a/n: y'all wanted the Josh angst so here itis]

[ponyosmom35]

I remember you (Elliot x OC)

Elliot Alderson x Original Character

Synopsis: The reader was dating Elliot before he forgot who he was, she never left his side. and months later he remembers.

He clutches his head as memories flash through his eyes. 

There she was, standing in a dress, her hair was curled and she had a smile on her face as she opened the door to see who’d knocked. This woman, the most beautiful creature he’d ever seen in his life. All of the air is stolen from his lungs as he meets her eyes. Her aqua-colored eyes. After seeing the note she posted in the mail room about needing help with her computer, Elliot was curious. He surprised himself by responding to the ad and emailing her. Two days later he stood in front of her door, his heart beating out of his chest. His palms sweating. He’d never felt this way before.

“Hi, Elliot I assume?” she asks  

“Uh yeah” he responds awkwardly 

“I’m Willow, and I cannot thank you enough for answering! I tried taking it to a shop but they wanted to charge me $200, this was kinda my last resort” she explains 

“I’m happy to help”

“I hope you’re good, because I don’t know the first thing about computers” she says “come on in” 

Elliot follows her into her apartment, the layout the exact same as his. She’d decorated the place well, it looked like a home. She had tons of plants brightening up the space, as well as wall art covering every inch of space. A lot of color. He noticed her large bookshelf, a gorgeous color-coded collection. Her windows had sheer multicolored curtains which kept her entire apartment incredibly visible from onlookers. She had no tv and a large cat lying in the center of her bed. Her desk sat in front of the window just like his own, giving her a view of the apartments across the street. He wondered if they could see into her space just as well. The thought made him sick to his stomach. 

“Here it is” she says leading him over to the desk, her MacBook sits in the middle of the desk, perfectly aligned with the planner next to it. As soon as he laid eyes on it, he could tell that it was a simple fix. Five minutes max. A part of him felt disappointed that it wasn’t a large project to keep him in her apartment for hours. 

“I see what’s going on, its no problem” he says as he begins typing in a code

“Oh my gosh you are literally a lifesaver, I need this for work like seriously my entire life is on this dumb computer” 

“Fuck me” he curses 

“Elliot what’s wrong?” she asks 

“No I told you, dinner is on me as a thank you” she smiles as she sits across from him in the diner. “What sounds good?” she asks 

“I’m not sure” 

“Well I can recommend their garden burger, it’s one of the best I’ve ever had” 

“Garden burger?” he asks 

“Oh I’m a vegetarian by choice. I watched an animal cruelty doc in high school and now I’m scared for life”

“Okay, I’ll try it” he nods 

“Really? Nobody has ever actually listened to my recommendations before” she laughs 

“If I hate it then that means you’ll just have to take me out again” he says, smiling at her

“Deal” she smirks 

“you’re scaring me”

“How did you get into coding? It seems like such a niche skill” she asks as they walk down the street side by side. His jacket slid over her shoulders. 

“My dad taught me my first code, I taught myself the rest” he shrugs 

“Why?”

“I always found it to be interesting, the power of hacking into something and being able to see all of the secrets someone’s hiding. You can see exactly who someone is, no sugar coating no lies. You can always trust a code” he admits, shocked that he felt comfortable enough to actually say any of this out loud. 

“Have you ever hacked me?” she asks quietly 

“No” 

“Why not?”

“You’re different, not like the rest. You don’t rely on technology to survive. I wanted to know you” he says 

“I’m glad you responded to my ad Elliot” she smiles 

“Me too”

“Do you want me to call Darlene?” she asks 

Elliot stands to his feet and scrambles to his door to see who would be knocking at 9 pm. He looks through the peephole and there she was. He rips the door open and stares at her in concern. Before he could say a word she drops her head as her lips tremble. Tears fall down her cheeks and Elliot panics. 

“What’s wrong?” he asks

“My boss, he asked me to dinner tonight to discuss our big meeting on Friday. But he never even brought it up,  he told me that If I didn’t sleep with him then I would lose my job. I can’t afford to lose my job, Elliot! I love what I do, fuck I don’t know what I’m gonna do” she responds. His body is filled with rage as he takes in her words. 

“What did you say?” he asks 

“I told him I had to go and I ran straight here” she sniffles 

Elliot pulls her into his arms, holding her body close to his as he lets her cry. He clutches onto her hair, smoothing it gently. He’d never been comfortable with touch before, yet at the moment he’d met this girl he wanted to touch her skin, feel how soft it would be. He craved her like nothing before. 

“I’m gonna fix this, don’t worry” he promises as he places a kiss on her head. 

“Please say something!” she pleads 

Elliot had just gotten off of work. He hated his new job. A simple programmer, protecting Allsafe from any potential hacks. The simplicity of it was nice, yet he craved more. He was capable of so much more. He sets his bag down and sits on his couch. He was tired, after he’d spent the night talking to Willow’s boss, he hacked him and exposed him to the police for money laundering. He’d stolen millions. He closes his eyes to attempt to get some rest when a hand slams on the door, pounding angrily. He gets up and opens it to see WIllow. 

She pushes past him and walks into the center of his apartment and crosses her arms. “Did you hack my boss?” 

“Yes” he shrugs 

“He got arrested at work today, they said he was stealing money” she snaps, he does not respond and stares at her blankly. “You can’t just do things like this Elliot!”

“I was protecting you” he says, causing her to stare at him with an unknown emotion in her eyes. 

“Its not your job to protect me, you put yourself at risk” 

“I don’t make mistakes, and I don’t leave evidence behind” he says moving closer to her

“I can take care of myself” she says in a small voice as he stands mere inches from her. 

“I know you can”

“So why do this?”

“He made you upset, he tried to hurt you. He doesn’t t get to go free after that” 

“Why does that matter to you?” she asks

“Because you - you’re everything to me Will” 

“I - what?” she asks 

“I refuse to let anyone hurt you ever again” 

Elliot places a hand on her cheek and kisses her gently. She gasps in shock and melts into his hold. The touch of her skin against his makes him feel alive. This is what he’d been searching for his entire life. Peace washes over his anxious brain. All of the loneliness that consumed his nights melted away. This was it, this was everything. 

His eyes finally focus on her own, noticing the panic in her eyes as her tears threaten to spill. Two years’ worth of memories flooded him. All of the unconditional love and support she’d given him. The hours she held him while his body fought his anxiety. The way she would curl into his chest at night, tucking herself into him. Her loud laugh bounced off the walls of the apartment as she forced him to dance. He was happy, he was loved. And he’d forgotten her. Treated her horribly. She’d never said a word about who she was to him. Despite all of his words she stayed by his side. 

“I remember” he says simply 

“What?”

“I remember us” 

“Don’t fuck with me like that Elliot” she warns, stepping back. He reaches out and grips her arm out of instinct. 

“Your real name is Margaret, after your grandmother, but you go by your middle name” he says, watching as her tears fall. “You’re a Taurus and your favorite flowers are roses even though you’re allergic. You are my girlfriend, the woman I love. You are real”

“El?” she asks  

Elliot pulls her into a hug, holding her as though she may disappear any second. Willow breaks down into tears and cries into his shoulder. Her entire body shakes as she sobs. 

“Fuck I’m so sorry - I can’t even begin to apologize for what I’ve done” 

“It’s not your fault” 

“I left you”

“I knew something was wrong, it wasn’t you. I’ve been waiting for you to come back to me” she says as he wipes her tears 

“You knew?” 

“I wasn’t sure, but I knew that he wasn’t you. I’m just so glad that your back” she smiles

[nuggetsandmoose]

Dear Mr. Malek,

I’m so sorry for what I’m doing to your character on Character AI! But unfortunately I love Angst!!!

-sincerely, NuggetsandMoose

P.S (I wanna Cry for what I’m doing!)

[angstyandromanticwriting]

Elliot Alderson X Reader Angsty Love Confession Prompt

!TW: Anxiety, implied mention of self harm and suicide (as a worry), implied suffering from depression, hint to plan of committing suicide, implied plan of self harming, phrase ‘dead body’!

“Can’t you see that there are people who care about you, Y/n?” Elliot asked, his voice trembling briefly; he was worried because you’d locked yourself in the bathroom after you’d been fighting with him, and he didn’t want to lose you or see that you’d hurt yourself again. “That I care about you?” Elliot pried, desperate for you to open the door and show him that you were okay, but you felt as if you couldn’t. “Why are you even doing this, Y/n?” Elliot questioned, a hint of frustration in his voice.

You grimaced; you thought that maybe he could guess why you were doing this. “I’m doing this because this is just too much for me now, Elliot,” you expressed, your eyes beginning to glisten over with tears, “I can’t act like this anymore; like I don’t love you..” Elliot frowned, bowing his head slightly. “But you keep proving to me, or showing me that you could never love me, and - do you know how much that hurts, Elliot?” You inquired, and Elliot began to feel guilty; he did have feelings for you, but he just didn’t want things to change between you and him so drastically. “Are you even still listening to me?” You questioned, and Elliot wouldn’t know what to say, subconsciously connecting his forehead to the door. “Fine,” you muttered, “don’t worry; you won’t have to bother looking after me ever again soon-”

“No-!” Elliot exclaimed, becoming even more desperate as he attempted to open the door again, and he even tried to throw himself against it; he didn’t want to lose you. “I can’t lose you, again!” Elliot cried, and you hesitantly set the razor back down on the shelf. “Don’t make me lose you again,” Elliot begged, his voice weak; he was trying not to cry.

You hesitantly stood up, leaning against the bathroom door. “So - You’d only believe that I love you when you’re on the verge of losing me?” You guessed, and Elliot winced, a pained expression on his face.

“No!” Elliot claimed, silently begging you to open the door. “Why - Why would you even think that, Y/n?” Elliot inquired, and you grunted; you couldn’t believe that he was being so oblivious.

“Seriously, Elliot?” You retorted, and Elliot fell quiet, wishing he’d treated you differently in the past. “You never believe me! If I told you I loved you tomorrow, would you even believe me?” You asked, and Elliot nodded quickly.

��Of course I would,” Elliot answered, and you scoffed.

“You’re only saying that because you don’t want to deal with a dead body in your bathroom,” you uttered, and Elliot shook his head, a hurt look on his face.

“Look,” Elliot began nervously, “I didn’t want to tell you like this, Y/n, but - You’re leaving me no other options - I-.. I love you, Y/n, I was just too scared to tell you before, and - I can’t ignore my feelings any longer, I see that now; I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I see that we should stop dancing around it, b-because all it’s doing is hurting us both; I should have known before that this would happen, and I’m sorry for being so blind.”

You reluctantly opened the bathroom door, and Elliot expressed relief, before he threw his arms around you. You held him at arm’s length, and he suddenly found that he felt too nervous to look you in the eyes. You grimaced, a hurt look on your face; you were beginning to think that he hadn’t meant what he’d previously said. “You were lying,” you murmured, and Elliot panicked, shaking his head quickly as he held your arms tightly; he was worried that he would still lose you. “It’s like you never really see me,” you mused, your voice trembling briefly, “I’m standing right in front of you, but you still don’t see me!”

“I do see you,” Elliot contradicted, “d-do I really have to spell it out for you? I love you, Y/n!” You fell quiet, your eyes searching his greyish blue ones. “A-Are you happy, now?” Elliot pried, his voice cracking.

You wanted to hear him say the three words again, so you pretended as if you didn’t believe him, though you felt as if you could, now. “I - I don’t know, Elliot, it feels like you’re just saying it-”

“I’m not!” Elliot cried, before he brought himself to place his hand on your cheek. “I love you, okay? I love you!” Elliot exclaimed, before he began to cry, surprising you.

You wrapped your arms around him to comfort him, and he returned the hug, sobbing quietly. “I know, Elliot,” you reassured him, “I just wanted to hear you say it again.” Elliot smiled weakly up at you, before he hesitantly connected his lips to your’s.

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed this prompt! ❤️

[safin-supremacy]

Lyutsifer Safin X Reader Cute prompt mixed with angst and injury

“Do you regret it?” Safin asked, looking up at you.

You would be confused, looking over at him. “Regret what?” You pried, and he frowned, looking away.

“Me,” Safin answered, and you shook your head.

“Why would I regret you?” You questioned, and he would be surprised, glancing up at you. You intertwined your fingers with his, and he smiled weakly up at you. “I love you,” you reassured him, before you sat beside him so you could hold his hand, before you leaned forward to connect your lips to his.

𖧷☭𖤍

“I can’t make it, Y/n,” Safin murmured, but you wouldn’t listen; you couldn’t lose him, trying to run faster.

“Oh, really?” You responded, and Safin groaned, wishing you’d give up; he was in a lot of pain, and wanted it to just stop.

↯

“Your mind games don’t work on me,” Safin murmured, smiling weakly up at you; you were trying to comfort him after what had happened to him.

“Really? I thought I was getting better at that,” you responded, “I was practicing what to say.”

Safin chuckled, intertwining his fingers with your’s. “You may be better at it, angel, but you can’t fool me,” he claimed, and you gave in, carefully laying down beside him.

𖧷☭𖤍

“W-What do you mean by that?” You asked, nervous.

Safin winced, looking over at you. “It’s nothing, angel,” he responded; he didn’t want to worry you. “Go back upstairs,” he instructed softly, and reluctantly you did as he said, though you were suspicious of him.

𖧷☭𖤍

Safin groaned, wincing as you attempted to remove the bullet from his side; you’d had to do it before when you couldn’t find any of the doctors around who could help him. “How had does it look?” Safin inquired, and you shook your head, glancing up at him. “Bad?” Safin guessed, and you nodded as you tried to clean the wound, before you began to stitch it with the needle and thread you found in one of the kits.

“Why would you even come back here when you knew it was risky to?” You questioned, and Safin grunted, trying to think of a lie as he was too embarrassed to give you the real reason.

“I’m only here to establish an alibi,” he claimed, and you would be disappointed, but tried to hide it.

“Well you were an idiot for coming here,” you mumbled, and he lifted an eyebrow at you.

“I don’t think your axe is sharp enough to hurt me,” he responded, grinning.

Safin whimpered when he made an attempt to move, and you shook your head, silently scolding him. “You need rest,” you stated, before you helped Safin to his feet, and led him to your room so he could lie down on the bed.

𖧷☭𖤍

You would be surprised to find Safin out of bed when you returned home after you met up with your friends; he was clearly suspicious of you. “Where were you?” Safin questioned before you could utter a word, and you groaned, looking away from him; you were too tired to deal with him at this moment. “Were you with him?” Safin pried, and you guessed that he was referring to James. You tried to speak, but he wouldn’t let you respond, scaring you as he approached you threateningly. “You’re not allowed to see him anymore!” Safin hissed, and you lowered your head slightly, irritated; you just wanted to sleep. “Why must you always betray me?” Safin inquired, a pained expression on his face.

“I didn’t betray you, Safin,” you muttered, trying to move past him, but he stopped you.

“If you still love him, why have you been choosing to stay with me whenever I’ve given you the chance to leave me?” Safin asked, and you frowned.

“I don’t love him, Safin!” You exclaimed, wondering what it would take for him to believe you. “I’ve wanted to stay with you because I believe, no - I know there is still good in you,” you explained, and Safin tilted his head partially at you.

Safin allowed a soft smile to play on his lips, before he stepped closer to you, intertwining his fingers with your’s. “You’re the best part of me,” he expressed, and you shyly wrapped your arms around him.

~~~~~

Sorry for not posting for a while today, I’ve just been busy with some stuff. Hope you enjoyed this prompt! ❤️

[safinsisland]

Starter Call

We are hiring

Gardener for a private horticulture

Preferly a specialist in knot garden

Edible and medicinal plants

f/m/d, no allergies

5 day week, 4 weeks payed vacation

Room and board

Contact safinpharmaceutics@freenet.de - or like for a starter. We shall find you.

[randofanficrecs]

Today's random fic comes from the Blackout - Endeavor Content (Podcast) fandom, Escape by rathernotmyname.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 978 Fandom: Blackout (Podcast) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Simon Itani/Carla Itani Characters: Simon Itani, Rami Malek Additional Tags: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, What-If, Poor Simon, Post Episode: s01e01, Hospitalization, Gunshot Wounds, ← reason for T-Rating, Fictober! Day 19 Series: Part 19 of Fictober! 2020 Language: English Summary: It’s blood loss but probably also just plain exhaustion. Either way, Simon passes out for a few seconds and comes back around when his face collides with the car horn.

Or: How did Simon get to the hospital after he was shot at the end of the first episode? This is my theory.

[tokkiwrites]

"Summer nights like this had a way of unfolding secrets. The kind of nights when the air hung heavy with pine and smoke, the moon glinting like a shy voyeur against the rippling surface of the lake. This wasn’t your first time at the Washington family cabin, but it was the first time that everything felt different. No parents. No rules. And, worst of all, no escape from the fact that Josh Washington was here, and he wasn’t yours."

summary: Your best friend invites you to their annual summer trip to the family cabin in the mountains—something you've done before. But this year is different: no parents. After years of secretly harboring feelings for your best friend’s brother, Josh, you decide this is the perfect chance to finally confess.

tags: best friend's brother!joshua washington x f!reader, childhood crush, both josh and reader like each other but act oblivious (josh more than reader), reader is low key obsessed with josh, minor age gap, alternative universe where Hannah and Beth are still alive, some angst, p in v (protected), virginity loss (reader), kind of fluff, josh talks you through it (yummy!!), fingering (f receiving), idiots in love 🫶🏻

/ᐠ - ˕ -マ⁩ tokkis note 𑁯 ✿ hey... how yall doing... the rami malek fever is so real i had to write something. so i did. 6,45k words to be more exact, teehee! i dont quite know what this is, but i had fun writing it, like it got me giggling and shit so yeah 💀 if you see any typos close your eyes, forget you saw anything. enjoy!

7th grade. That was when you stopped thinking of Josh Washington as just Hannah’s annoying older brother. Between the way he stayed behind after soccer practice to teach you how to kick a penalty and the smirk he threw over his shoulder, like he knew you were watching him. The first time when you actually considered Josh not being a jerk like other boys. In 9th grade, he became the hottest guy you had ever met. or maybe you just got so used to his face that you didn't want to look at other boys. Fast forward to now, you're starting college in one month, and things have changed in a way. maybe for the worstㅡ because he's all you can think about.

“You’re staring again.” Hannah’s voice snaps you out of your daze. She’s grinning, nudging your ribs as the two of you sit on the couch in the cabin. “You’re so obvious.” You blink and turn toward her, cheeks heating. “I—I wasn’t staring!”

“Oh, you were,” she teases, popping a chip into her mouth. “What is it this time? The hair? The jawline? Or did you finally notice his arms? I mean, have you seen him chop firewood? That’s peak Josh.”

“Hannah!” You hiss, smacking her arm. She only laughs, and you can’t help but roll your eyes. But she’s not wrong. Somewhere between your senior year of high school and now, Josh had gone from the boy who made stupid puns to the man who could take your breath away just by walking into a room. Unfortunately, it seems like he doesn’t notice.

“Still no move, huh?” Hannah says, lowering her voice. “You’re not seriously going to spend another summer in silent agony, are you?” You sigh. “What am I supposed to say? ‘Hey, Josh, remember me? The girl who used to wear braces and cried when I lost my retainer? Cool. Wanna make out?’” Hannah snorts so loudly that Beth, sitting nearby with her book, looks over with a frown. “What are you two laughing about now?”

“Nothing,” you and Hannah say in unison, though she’s still stifling giggles. Beth looks at you both, arching a brow. “Sure,” she says, clearly unconvinced, but she doesn’t push. She returns to her book, leaving you free to squirm under Hannah’s knowing gaze.

Josh doesn’t stick around to witness your humiliation. He’s already disappeared into the kitchen, and the sound of the fridge opening and the clinking of bottles is the only thing tethering you to the moment. “Do something this trip,” Hannah murmurs, leaning close so Beth doesn’t overhear. “Seriously. You’ve been mooning over him since forever. And now—” she waves a hand at the open windows, the twilight stretching wide like a stage—“this is your moment.”

“Hannah, it’s not like that,” you say, but even you don’t believe it. Not when your heart skips every time Josh is within ten feet of you. “It’s exactly like that,” she shoots back, voice low but insistent. “He likes you, too, you know.” You look at her sharply. “What?”

“Oh, don’t give me that face,” Hannah says, rolling her eyes. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you. He’s just... Josh. Oblivious as hell.”

You’re about to argue, to tell her she’s wrong, that there’s no way Joshua Washington— carefree, clever, confident Josh, could ever see you like that. But before you can, his voice carries from the kitchen. “You two plotting something?” Your breath hitches, and Hannah, ever the instigator, grins. “Maybe,” she calls back. Josh reappears, beer in hand, and leans against the doorway. His green eyes flick between the two of you, and for a moment, you swear they linger on you. “Well, don’t blow up the cabin,” he says with a crooked smile before heading out onto the porch.

That night, the cabin settled into quiet. Beth retires early, Hannah tucked away in the room you’re sharing, and yet you can’t sleep. Your thoughts swirl—images of Josh’s hands, the way his eyes looked into yours, his voice, smooth and teasing, the way his smile felt like a hook tugging you somewhere you shouldn’t want to go.

The room feels suffocating, the summer heat pressing against your skin. You slip out of bed as quietly as you can, grabbing a towel and slipping into your swimsuit. The lake isn’t far. You’ve been there a hundred times before, but tonight, it feels like it’s waiting just for you. The water is cold when you first step in, but it’s a welcome relief, a shock that clears your head. You wade in deeper, letting the towel drop onto the shore, and soon, the swimsuit feels like too much. You hesitate, glancing back toward the cabin, but it’s silent and still. “Just you and the lake,” you whisper to yourself. The swimsuit peels away, and the water envelops you like a second skin. You float, staring up at the sky, letting the cool liquid carry the weight of your thoughts.

But then a voice shatters the stillness.

“Didn’t take you for a midnight swimmer.”

You jolt, water sloshing as you whirl toward the shore. Josh is standing there, hands in his pockets, his head cocked in that infuriatingly casual way he always manages. “Josh!” You shriek, sinking deeper into the water. “What are you doing out here?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” he says, stepping closer to the water’s edge. “Couldn’t sleep?”

“Something like that,” you mutter, your cheeks burning even as the water cools your skin. His eyes sweep over the lake, lingering just long enough to make your heart race. “You always were full of surprises,” he says softly, almost to himself. “Are you just going to stand there and watch me, or are you joining?” you ask before you can think better of it. The question hangs in the air, bold and daring, and for a moment, you think you’ve scared him off. But then he grins.

“Alright.”

You watch, half in awe, as he pulls his shirt over his head, revealing the toned lines of his chest and the faint trail of scars along his ribs. He doesn’t stop there, shucking off his jeans until he’s left in his boxers.

The water ripples as he drops in, and suddenly, he’s closer than you expected, the space between you charged with something you can’t quite name. “This is nice,” he says, his voice quieter now, almost reverent. You nod, the words caught in your throat. “Do you ever feel like...” He trails off, his gaze fixed on the horizon. “Like there’s something just out of reach? Like you want to grab it, but you’re scared of what happens if you do?”

Your heart thuds. “All the time.” His gaze shifts to you, his expression unreadable. For a moment, you think he’s going to say something—something that will change everything. Instead, he leans back, letting himself float. “Good thing we’ve got the whole summer,” he murmurs.

You’re not sure if he’s talking to you or himself. But one thing is clear: you’ll spend every moment of this summer trying to pull him closer.

The next morning, the cabin feels alive with the quiet rustle of summer. Birds trill in the trees, and sunlight pours through the open windows, a golden invitation to start the day. Hannah is already on the deck with a cup of coffee, scrolling on her phone when you step out. “You’re up early,” she says, not looking up. You shrug, trying to hide how restless you’d been all night after what happened at the lake. “Couldn’t sleep.”

She raises a brow but doesn’t press. “Josh is down at the dock,” she says, nodding toward the lake. “Probably sulking. You know how he gets.”

You hesitate. “Why’s he sulking?”

She snorts. “Because the rest of the group isn’t getting here until tomorrow. You’d think one day without his entourage wouldn’t kill him.” You glance toward the lake. the memory of last night. Josh’s quiet words, the way the moonlight danced in his eyes, it's still fresh in your mind. “You should go,” Hannah says, smirking now. “Cheer him up. Or stare at him some more. Whatever works.”

“Hannah!” But she’s already gone, slipping back into the cabin and leaving you with no choice but to head toward the dock.

Josh is sitting on the edge of the wooden dock, his feet dangling in the water. The air smells like cedar and the faint tang of sunscreen. for a moment, you almost turn back. But then he glances over his shoulder and sees you. “Morning,” he says, his voice softer than usual. “Hey,” you say, stepping onto the dock and sitting a few feet away. For a while, neither of you speak. The lake stretches out before you, endless and still, and it feels like the world has shrunk to just the two of you.

“Big day ahead of us,” Josh says eventually, his tone laced with sarcasm. “Yeah,” you reply, matching his smile. “So many exciting activities. Staring at trees. Staring at water. Staring at each other.” He laughs, and the sound is warm and unexpected. “Careful. I might think you’re obsessed with me.” Your stomach flips, but you keep your voice light. “Who says I’m not?”

Josh looks at you then, really looks at you, and for a second, you wonder if you’ve said too much. But instead of teasing, his expression softens. “I don’t get you sometimes,” he says quietly.

“What do you mean?” He shrugs, kicking at the water. “You’re just...different. Not like everyone else.” oh boy. “Good different or bad different?” you ask, your heart in your throat. Josh doesn’t answer right away. His gaze shifts to the endless forest, and when he finally speaks, his voice pangs through you.

“Good,” he says. "Definitely good.”

The rest of the day is a blur of lazy activities—helping Beth organize the kitchen, listening to Hannah’s playlist on the deck, and avoiding Josh just enough to keep your heart from imploding. By sunset, the air is thick with the anticipation of the group’s arrival tomorrow. Hannah flops onto the couch beside you, phone in hand. “Sam says they’re leaving first thing in the morning,” she says. “So, enjoy the quiet while it lasts.”

“Quiet?” Beth calls from the kitchen, laughing. “Have you met us?” Hannah rolls her eyes. “You know what I mean. Tomorrow it’s going to be chaos. Jess and Emily bickering, Chris and Ashley pretending they’re not totally in love, Matt trying to keep the peace...and then there’s Josh.”

“What about Josh?” You ask before you can stop yourself. Hannah gives you a look. “You tell me.”

That night, you find yourself back at the lake, drawn by the same restless energy that kept you up the night before. You don’t plan on skinny dipping again—it feels too risky with everyone around—but the water calls to you anyway, soothing and eternal.

And maybe, just maybe, Josh feels the same right now.

You’re sitting on the shore, toes dipping into the cool water when you hear footsteps behind you. “Couldn’t sleep again?” You don’t have to turn around to know it’s him. “I could say the same to you,” you reply, glancing back. Josh sits beside you, his shoulder brushing yours, and the warmth of him is enough to set your skin buzzing. “It’s weird, isn’t it?” he says after a while.

“What is?”

“Being back here. Without... you know. Adults. Rules.” You nod, the weight of his words settling over you. “Feels different.”

“Yeah,” he says, his voice quieter now. “Makes you think about stuff.”

“Like what?” you ask, heart pounding.

Josh doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he picks up a stone and skips it across the water. One, two, three perfect skips before it sinks. “Like what happens next,” he says finally. “For all of us. Feels like everything’s about to change.”

You don’t know what to say to that. So, instead, you reach for your own stone, throwing it as hard as you can. It skips once before plunking into the water. “Guess I’ll just have to stick around and figure it out,” you say, keeping your voice light.

Josh looks at you, his eyes shadowed and searching, and for a moment, you think he’s going to say something. what you want to hear, maybe. something important. But instead, he smiles, that same lopsided grin that’s been haunting your dreams for years. “Good,” he says.

“I’d miss you otherwise.”

The cabin feels too small the moment the others arrive. It’s a blur of bodies, laughter, and chaos as the others spill into the space, dragging in bags, cooler boxes, and enough energy to wake the dead. It’s not that you mind them—you’ve known most of Josh’s friends for years, but something about the way the cabin hums now feels different. The tight, intimate bubble you’d shared with Josh, Hannah, and Beth is gone, replaced by noise and the easy rhythm of their group. You feel...adrift, to say the least. And watching Josh slip seamlessly back into his role as the charismatic center of attention only makes it worse.

By the time night falls, the cabin is alive with music, the sharp pop of bottle caps, and the low buzz of conversation. You find yourself perched in a corner of the living room, a half-empty drink in hand, watching the others like a ghost at your own party.

Josh is at the center of it all, as always. He’s standing near the couch, laughing at something Sam said, and the sound is enough to send your stomach twisting into knots. Sam, of course, is radiant—effortlessly pretty in her cropped sweatshirt, her hair catching the light like spun gold. She’s animated, gesturing with her hands, and every time Josh leans closer to hear her, you feel like the room tilts off its axis. “Hey,” Hannah says, sliding in next to you with a knowing look. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” you lie, taking a sip of your drink. Hannah snorts. “Subtle.” You glance at her, frowning. “What?”

“You know what,” she says, tilting her head toward Josh and Sam. “Seriously, if you’re going to keep looking at him like that, you might as well do something about it.”

“I’m not looking at him,” you protest weakly. Hannah rolls her eyes. “Sure. And I’m not your best friend.” She pauses, watching you for a moment before her expression softens. “Look, you’re not exactly subtle when it comes to Josh. But for what it’s worth? I think he’s just as clueless about how he feels as you are.” Her words settle into your chest, a mix of hope and frustration, but before you can respond, Jess calls out from the other side of the room.

“Hey! Who’s up for Spin the Bottle?” You couldn’t escape it, let's be honest.

You don’t know how it happens, but somehow, you end up in the circle. Maybe it’s the drinking, or maybe it’s Hannah giving you a pointed nudge as everyone sits on the floor, but before you know it, you’re sandwiched between her and Ashley, your pulse pounding in your ears. Josh is directly across from you, his green eyes bright in the firelight. Sam is to his left, Jess to his right, and the knot in your stomach tightens. “Okay, ground rules,” Jess says, grinning wickedly. “No chickening out. You spin, you kiss. Period.”

There’s a chorus of laughter and a few groans, but no one protests. Chris goes first, spinning the bottle with dramatic flair. It lands on Ashley, who blushes furiously but leans in to kiss him. The group erupts in cheers and wolf whistles, and you can’t help but smile despite yourself.

One by one, the bottle makes its rounds. Jess and Emily kiss, Matt kisses Ashley despite him protesting, and eventually, it’s Josh’s turn. He spins the bottle with a lazy flick of his wrist, the glass neck twirling endlessly before it slows, stops, and lands on Sam.

Your stomach drops.

“Oh, come on,” Jess says, clapping her hands. “This is gonna be good.” Josh raises an eyebrow, glancing at Sam. She shrugs, smiling, and leans forward.

You can’t look away.

Their lips meet in a brief, playful kiss—nothing dramatic, nothing earth-shattering. but it’s enough. Enough to make your chest ache, your fingers tighten around the drink in your hand. When they pull apart, everyone cheers again, and Josh laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. “Your turn,” he says, handing the bottle to Sam. But you don’t care. You’re too busy swallowing the lump in your throat, trying to ignore the way your vision blurs at the edges.

Later, when the game ends and the group begins to disperse, you slip outside, the cool night air a welcome relief from the suffocating cabin. The lake stretches out before you, dark and endless, and for a moment, you let yourself breathe.

“You okay?” The voice startles you, and you turn to see Josh standing there, hands in his pockets. “I’m fine,” you say quickly, brushing at your eyes. He frowns, stepping closer. “You sure? You looked kind of...I don’t know, off.” You force a laugh, crossing your arms. “I’m fine, Josh. Really.” For a moment, he just looks at you, his brow furrowed like he’s trying to figure out a puzzle.

“You’re a terrible liar,” he says softly. The words hit harder than they should, and before you can stop yourself, you snap. “What do you want me to say, Josh? That I didn’t love watching you kiss Sam? That it didn’t suck seeing you two all cozy earlier?” His eyes widen, caught off guard, and for a second, you regret everything. But then his expression shifts—something softer, something almost...guilty.

“I didn’t...” He trails off, running a hand through his hair. “I wasn’t trying to...” You shake your head, wrapping your arms tighter around yourself. “Forget it. It’s not your fault.” Josh hesitates, like he’s weighing his next words carefully. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you,” he says finally, his voice barely above a whisper.

You glance at him, your heart aching at the look in his eyes—conflicted, searching. “I know,” you say quietly. “It’s fine. Really.” But it’s not fine. And as you turn back toward the cabin, leaving Josh standing by the lake, you can’t help but wonder if this summer is going to break you before it’s over.

The sun hung low in the sky, painting the cabin in hues of orange and gold. The group was scattered—Jess and Emily were bickering over sunscreen, Chris and Ashley were curled up on the deck talking in low tones, and Sam was by the lake with Hannah, skipping stones. It was all too perfect, too idyllic, except for the hollow ache in your chest.

Josh had been avoiding you all day.

It wasn’t like he was being obvious about it—Josh had a knack for slipping into conversations, filling the room with his sharp wit and charm like nothing was wrong. But you felt it. In the way his eyes would dart past you when you entered a room, the way his laugh seemed just a little louder when you weren’t around.

And maybe you were just as bad, lurking in the corners, pretending not to notice how often he touched Sam’s arm when they talked.

Written across your heart was all of your will to make him see—make him realize there was no in-between. There was either you and him, or the hollow echo of “I’m so sorry for your loss.” And wasn’t that what it felt like already? Like mourning something that never got the chance to live?

But it was his fault, wasn’t it?

For making you want him so much that your heart bled angel tears. For teaching your lips to sing sweet once-upon-a-times about a boy who was all sharp edges and hidden softness, who didn’t realize how much space he took up in your world.

By late afternoon, you found yourself back at the lake. It had become your refuge, the only place where you could breathe without the weight of Josh’s absence pressing against your ribs. Your toes skimmed the water’s edge, the cool ripples kissing your skin. You weren’t thinking about anything in particular—just the endless horizon, the way the light danced on the surface of the lake. But then a voice broke through your thoughts.

“You hiding out here now?” You didn’t have to turn around to know it was him. Again.

“Maybe I am,” you said, your voice sharper than you intended. Josh sighed, stepping closer. You could feel the heat of him at your back, the way his presence wrapped around you even when you didn’t want it to. “Look,” he said finally, his voice softer. “About the other night...” You turned to face him, cutting him off. “It’s fine, Josh. You don’t owe me an explanation.”

“Yes, I do.” His eyes—those endless green eyes—searched yours, his expression uncharacteristically serious. “No, you don’t,” you said, forcing a smile. “We’re friends. That’s all we’ve ever been, right?”

Josh flinched, like the word “friends” was a physical blow. “I didn’t mean to hurt you,” he said quietly. For a moment, you believed. But then you shook your head, stepping away. “You didn’t, Josh,” you said. “I’m fine.”

That night, the group decided to make a bonfire by the lake. The air was thick with laughter, the sharp scent of burning wood mingling with the sweetness of roasted marshmallows.

You sat with Hannah and Beth, listening as Chris tried to tell a ghost story that kept getting interrupted by Jess’s sarcastic commentary. Josh was across the fire, sitting next to Sam. He wasn’t touching her, wasn’t even looking at her, but it didn’t matter.

Your hair cascaded like Niagara under the firelight, your lips so soft—even if he had never felt them under his. Josh couldn’t stop looking at you. Your eyes glowed like an eternity, and your voice—when you laughed at something - it was the only antidote he’d ever had for all those sleepless nights.

He didn’t know how to fix this.

Didn’t know how to reach across the chasm that had opened between you since that stupid game of Spin the Bottle. And maybe it was selfish—maybe it was cruel—but he wanted you to look at him the way you used to. Like he was something worth believing in.

The fire burned low as the group began to drift off, one by one. Eventually, it was just you and Josh, the silence between you heavy and unspoken. “Shouldn’t you be with Sam?” you asked, your tone biting. Josh frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing,” you said quickly, standing. “I’m going to bed.” But before you could leave, his hand shot out, catching your wrist. “Wait,” he said, his voice urgent. You froze, refusing to look at him. “Can we just—” He hesitated, his grip loosening. “Can we talk?” You pulled away, your chest tightening. “Not tonight, Josh.” He didn’t stop you this time, and as you walked back to the cabin, you felt the weight of his gaze on your back.

Neither of you slept that night.

The stars were muted behind a veil of clouds, the air heavy with the promise of rain. The cabin was quieter now. Days of forced smiles and lingering silences had worn you thin, and tonight, you found yourself outside again, pacing the gravel path that led to the lake.

You didn’t mean to cry.

It started as an ache in your chest, spreading to your throat until the tears came unbidden, hot, and relentless. You wiped at them furiously, hating the way they betrayed you, but the anger only made it worse.

How could he be so blind?

You heard footsteps behind you, familiar and deliberate. You didn’t need to turn around to know it was Josh. “Go away,” you said, your voice raw.

He didn’t.

“Hey,” he said softly, his tone careful, like he was afraid you’d shatter if he spoke too loud. “What’s wrong?” You laughed bitterly, the sound hollow in the stillness. “You really have to ask?” Josh shifted, running a hand through his hair. “Look, if this is about—”

“It’s not about Sam!” you snapped, whirling to face him. “It’s about you, Josh. It’s always about you.” His brows furrowed, confusion flickering in his green eyes. “What are you talking about?” You threw your hands up, frustration spilling over. “Do you know what it’s like? To feel like you’re screaming into the void, hoping, praying, that someone will hear you? To love someone so much that it hurts, only for them to act like you don’t even exist?” Josh’s expression shifted, the confusion replaced by something deeper, something raw.

“I—”

“You don’t get it,” you interrupted, your voice breaking. “You never have. And maybe that’s my fault. Maybe I should’ve said something years ago, but I didn’t, and now... now I can’t even look at you without feeling like I’m suffocating.” The tears came harder now, and you didn’t bother to stop them. Josh took a step closer, his jaw tight, but he didn’t speak. “Say something,” you demanded, your voice trembling. “Anything.”

He didn’t.

The silence stretched, thick and suffocating, until you shook your head, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. “Of course,” you said, turning away. “Why did I even expect—” But before you could take another step, his hand caught your arm, spinning you back toward him.

And then he kissed you.

It wasn’t soft.

It was desperate, messy, like he was trying to say all the words he couldn’t find through the press of his lips. His hands cradled your face, grounding you even as the world seemed to tilt beneath your feet. For a moment, you froze, too stunned to move. But then your hands found his shirt, clutching the fabric like it was the only thing keeping you from falling apart. When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his breath uneven.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice barely audible. “I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner. I’m sorry I made you feel like this.” Your chest ached, the anger draining from your body as quickly as it had come. “Josh,” you started, but he cut you off, his green eyes locking onto yours. “I don’t deserve you,” he said, his voice cracking. “I know I don’t. But you’re all I think about. You always have been.” The words broke something in you, and the tears came again, but this time, they weren’t born of anger or frustration. “Then why didn’t you say anything?” you asked, your voice trembling. “Because I’m a coward,” he admitted, a humorless laugh escaping his lips. “Because I’m an idiot who didn’t realize what he had until he almost lost it.” You stared at him, your heart pounding in your chest.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he said, his hands still framing your face. “I can’t.” You didn’t trust yourself to speak, so you did the only thing you could: you kissed him.

This time, it was softer, slower, filled with all the things you couldn’t put into words. And when you pulled back, his lips curved into a small, hesitant smile. “Does this mean you’ll stop avoiding me?” you asked, your voice shaking with a mix of laughter and tears. Josh chuckled, pressing another kiss to your forehead. “You'll start wishing I would."

The first low rumble of thunder rolled across the sky as you and Josh lingered, the sound so faint at first that you barely noticed it. But then it came again, louder this time, accompanied by a flash of light on the horizon, pulling you both from your kiss. You glanced up at the clouds gathering above, your chest tightening. Josh followed your gaze, a grin tugging at his lips. “You afraid of a little rain?” Before you could respond, the heavens opened up. The rain came in a sudden, torrential downpour, drenching you both in seconds. You yelped, the cold droplets soaking through your clothes as Josh let out a startled laugh. “Come on!” he shouted over the sound of the rain, grabbing your hand.

He led you up the path, past the cabin and deeper into the woods where a small gazebo stood, tucked beneath a canopy of trees. The structure was simple but charming, with its whitewashed beams and ivy creeping up the sides. Inside was a weathered but cozy couch, draped with soft blankets that someone—Hannah, probably—had left there.

You stumbled under the shelter just as another crack of thunder split the sky. The sound was deafening, but you couldn’t help laughing as you leaned against one of the beams, rainwater dripping from your hair and clothes. Josh stood across from you, his hands on his hips, his shirt clinging to his chest in a way that made your heart race all over again. His hair was a mess, dark strands sticking to his forehead, and yet he looked unfairly good—smiling at you like this was the best night of his life.

“Well,” he said, shaking water from his hair, “so much for staying dry.” You rolled your eyes, wrapping your arms around yourself. “You think?” He stepped closer, his grin softening into something warmer. “Here.” He reached for one of the blankets on the couch, shaking it out before draping it over your shoulders. His fingers brushed your arms as he adjusted it, and you shivered, though it wasn’t from the rain. “Thanks,” you murmured, your voice quieter now.

Josh sat beside you on the couch, his arm resting along the back as he leaned into the cushions. The rain pattered against the roof of the gazebo, a rhythmic hum that filled the silence between you. “You know,” he said after a moment, his voice low, “I kind of like this.” You glanced at him, eyebrows raised. “Getting caught in a thunderstorm?”

“No,” he said, chuckling. “Being here. With you.” You looked away, focusing on the rain streaking down the gazebo’s wooden beams. “Josh...” “Hey,” he said, his voice softer now. You felt his hand brush against yours, tentative, like he was testing the waters. “Look at me.” You turned to face him, your eyes meeting his. The rain softened the world around you, muting everything except the warmth in his gaze.

For a moment, neither of you spoke. It was just the two of you, sitting close on that old couch, the rain falling like a curtain around the gazebo. You could feel it, that familiar warmth creeping up within you, curling in your stomach every time Josh was near. Your heart thuds as his rough palm drags itself up your exposed thigh. Before you could stop yourself, the words rushed out of your mouth. “I’m a virgin!” Your face flushed a deep crimson as soon as the words left your lips, and you immediately covered your face with your hands in embarrassment.

Josh froze for a beat, his hand still resting on your thigh. You could feel his gaze on you, but you didn’t dare look up. And then, to your surprise, you heard him laugh softly, the sound low and warm. “Wait... really?” he asked, his voice filled with amusement but also something softer, something affectionate.

You peeked up at him, still hiding half of your face behind your hands, the flush on your cheeks deepening. “Yeah, really,” you mumbled, not sure whether you were embarrassed or relieved to finally say it out loud. Josh’s grin widened, and there was a playful glint in his eyes as he leaned a little closer. “I gotta admit, that’s a little... surprising.” He paused, his tone teasing but gentle. “But, hey, no rushing." Your heart skipped a beat at the thought of him being your first. You nodded, your eyes searching his face, still unsure whether to be embarrassed or... maybe a little proud?

His hand gently moved from your thigh to rest on your knee, his thumb brushing over your skin in slow, reassuring circles. “Don’t be embarrassed,” he said quietly, his voice soft. “I'm not trying anything unless you want to.” You looked up at him, meeting his gaze, and found only kindness there— no teasing, no judgment, just understanding. And somehow, that made everything feel a little easier. "I do want to... you know.." The words won't come out. “Still,” you muttered, “it’s... kind of awkward, don’t you think?” Josh chuckled, that warm smile never leaving his face. “Don't think so” he said, his voice low and serious now, “if you’re gonna share something like that with anyone, I’m glad it could be me."

You nod, scooting closer to him, palms now flush on his chest. his eyes scan your every inch, and you try to look away, but he captures your lips into another kiss. his lips trail down to your neck with a low "can I?" And you hum, trying your best to stay quiet as you get used to the feeling.

in no time, you're under him, both entangled, half naked and out of breath. he finally pulls off your panties, tossing them to the floor as he spreads your cunt wide open with two of his fingers, and god, you looked so erotic, all shying away as he loomed over, fingers playing with your pussy. "You ever touched yourself like this before?" You nod, bottom lip captive between your teeth. "J-just a little..." Oh, god. "You're so beautiful, fuckㅡ" And he's already losing his mind. Nights of fantasizing couldn’t have prepared him for this.

placing his palm behind your knee, he lifts up your legs, laying light pecks onto the plush of your thighs, thumb now tracing down to your puffy clit. Josh starts slowly, swirling his finger and still kissing your soft flesh. "Thank you for letting me do this." tracing the entrace with his index, he pushes his finger slow and deep inside, and you arch against him. this was it. he was where all of his dreams led him to. you looked like something straight out of a 80's porno. cunningly, josh moved his finger, and before you knew it he added another one. you squeezed perfectly around his digits, the sounds you and your pussy made driving him to the brink. "You hear that?" he asks, curling up his fingers, the wet sounds amplifying. "don't think I've ever had a pussy this wet before..." you whimper ans wrigle under his hold. "Josh.."

"What? It's the truth." he chuckles, speed picking up, his other hand now flush to your lower belly. "Want you to come. Can you do that for me?" he looks up, doe eyes searching for yours, and you can already feel your body convulsing. it didn't take long for you to finally give in and gift him what he asked for, coming just from his fingers. the way you thighs squeezed together, trapping his hand between them, soft pleads dripping from your lips like honeyㅡ he was done for. you were embarrassed, to say the least, hiding your face into his shirt he had taken off long ago. "Stop that, heyㅡ look at me, baby." Baby. did you just come again? "You did great. so good." he leans in over you, pressing a soft kiss on the bridge of your nose. "Do you wanna keep going?" and you say the most eager 'yes' known to man. "i got you." he smiles, eyes tracing every curve of your body. he takes off his pants along with hus briefs, letting his shaft spring free, small pearls of precum already gathered at the tip.

your eyes opened. what the fuck? is that normal? you knew your first would hurt, but seeing what Josh had going on for him you knew it would be the most painful experience for you yet. "Don't worry. I'll go slow." he stumbles a bit back, grabbing a hold of his trousers, palming his pockets before he mutters a soft 'there we go.' and takes out a shiny wrapperㅡ a condom. the opens it and carefully takes it out, lining it with the tip of his aching cock. "If you ever wanna stopㅡ" he start, whilst rolling the condom down his length. "Tell me. Yeah?" you nod.

taking his length into his fist, Josh pumps it a few times before he aligns it with your entrance that trickled with juices. he lets it slip in, and your eyes close as tears threaten to fall. you claw at his back, but Josh kisses you as he slides in some more, your walla wrapping perfectly around himㅡ just like it was meant to be. "It's okay, you're okay, baby."

after going in the last couple of inches, he starts to move, gently holding down onto your waist as he lets you adjust. "Doing so food for me."

just a few strokes after he feels you wrapping your legs around his hips, urging him deeper. "Please.." You plead, the sweetest sounds escaping your plump and swollen lips, and he swears he could come just by that. "Fuck, yeah, okayㅡ" he groans, with the way your teary eyes stared up at him. He starts to move his hips, harder, deeper, each sound you made an encouragement. His palms make his way under your back, pulling you up, almost to sit on his lap. He fucks up into you, your arms lazily draped over his flexed shoulders whilst his lips kiss soft blooms onto your chest. you clench around him. "J-Josh..." he shakes his head, laughing as his fingers dig deep into your flesh where you know bruises will appear later. "Don'tㅡ ha, I'm gonna come if you keep doing that." whines slip past your lips as his speed picks up. "Shit, shitㅡ" he pulls you closer, lips now stuck to your neck like a locket. "Y-you gonna come?" he prys. "Mhm.." you squeal as your eyes roll back. "Go ahead, for me." that's all it took. you come once again, nimbly wrapping around josh like a vine, walls squeezing him so tight. your mind goes blank, only soft moans gripping your throat as Josh pumps into you, finally releasing inside of the condom with a few thrusts.

you both breathe heavily, hearts beating in a sing-song, as you come down from your high. realization sets in as you meet each other's gaze. it was real. it really just happened.

"You okay?" he leans in, pressing a lazy kiss onto your lips. "Yeah... How okay can one be after having sex for the first time..?" and he laughs, playing with the strands of your hair. "Thank god for the rain covering the sound. You were super loud just thenㅡ"

"Josh!"

[nena-la-fresa]

can i ask u a Josh Washigton x reader request? I would love to read an scenario were its the reader's birthday🥹

Keep It Warm

18+ Account | Minors DNI | Do NOT Follow, Like, or Comment | Pls have your age in your bio, if you do not I will automatically block you because I’ll assume you are a minor.

Pairing: Josh Washington x f! Reader

Warning: Fluff | A tiny bit of Angst | Mental Institution Mentioned | Birthday |

Word Count: 685

A/n: Hopefully this is okay. I feel like I can’t make a Josh fic without some sort of angst. Sorry it's super short. I have a lot of class assignments due this week so my focus is on that rn. Off topic but I'm thinking about making a Mr.Robot fic. Im back in my Rami Malek era.

“You are receiving a call from Ocean View Hospital. Would you like to accept?” 

“Yes.”

The line was then connected. 

“Hey sweetheart. How are you?” You could hear his sly look through the phone. 

You leaned against the wall fiddling with the hem of your shirt. 

“I’m good. How about yourself?” You missed hearing his voice. 

“I’m good now.” 

“Oh are you really?” 

“Yeah. I’m just glad I get to hear you talk. It’s a good distraction from all this.” 

“I’m glad I can distract you for a bit.” 

You had been friends with Josh since you both were little. You had always known something was a bit different with him. But it wasn’t until you both started dating that you had fully known the extent of his condition. Josh would wake up during the night screaming, he’d have a hard time recognizing you at times.

“So my birthday’s coming up.”

“It is, isn't it.” 

“Do you think you’ll finally be out by then?”

“I’m not too sure babe. But if I’m doing better by then you'll be the first to know.” 

You felt slightly disappointed but you knew he was in there to get the help he needed. 

That was 3 weeks ago. 

You hadn’t heard from Josh since that last phone call. He hadn’t been returning your letters or phone calls. You had begun to assume the worst. What if he didn’t want to talk to you anymore? Or what if he regressed? What if his meds stopped working. Even when you asked Hannah and Beth they hadn’t been able to contact him either. 

All you could think about was the day you found him. You could still see it. He was passed out on the floor. He was unresponsive for a good minute before you had to throw cold water on him. He was sobbing, saying how he wasn’t good enough for you. Saying that he didn’t deserve you. But those sobs quickly turned to anger, not at you but to whatever was talking around him. He swatted trying to get the voices away from him. But what really did it for him was when he accidentally hit you. The guilt that he felt, he didn’t mean it. He wasn’t aiming for you. He couldn’t even see you with his delusions tormenting him. That was what really made him commit himself. 

Hannah knew how upset you were but she thought it would be a good idea to take you to the cabin for your birthday. You had always said it was your favorite place to go. 

You and Hannah were already making your way to the cable cart, “Didn’t you say Beth was going to meet us here?” 

Hanna turned slightly to you, “Yeah, she got cold and just texted me that she was going to go ahead to the cabin.”

You nodded. After the walking you could finally see the cabin in sight. It was just as beautiful as you remembered it. Hannah held the door open for you as you walked in first. You felt your body jolt from the yelling. 

“Surprise!” Little poppers and kazoos echoed through the room. 

“Aw you guys.” You felt your eyes tear up a bit. From the excitement but also from the disappointment. Out of all the faces there, the one you wanted the most wasn’t there. 

You let out a surprised scream feeling someone picking you up from behind. As soon as you were set back down you saw who it was. 

Until you felt someone pick you up from behind 

It was him. 

“What did you think I forgot?”

You felt the tears run down your face. You nodded slightly.

"Now why would I forget about you."

You hugged him tightly, feeling his arms wrap around you.

“When did they let you out?”

“About three days ago.”

“Why didn't you tell me”

“I wanted to surprise you. I'm sorry”

“No, I'm just so happy. I’m so glad you’re here.”

“I promise I won’t miss another one.”

He wiped your tears, “I missed you so much. I’m sorry. I’ll do better. I promise.” 

[talkingwoman]

One vague fear about Complete Unknown Like most who have seen the trailer for Timmy’s next knock out performance, I am almost giddy about the new film.  My only lingering concern is that the script and treatment might not meet the standard of our boy’s performance.  The Rolling Stone article on Complete Unknown apparently shares my angst a little bit since they closed the article with the interviewer saying something like “ Since Dylan managed to get himself involved in the production we can assume that it will not be all true.”  To which Mangold, the film’s writer and director simply smiled and said “we’ll let that be your quote.”  Since I tend to fret about such stuff, could some of you please take a moment to reassure me that fan possessiveness about the legend of Bob Dylan will not affect the critical or box office success of Complete Unknown??   I’ve read Dylan fanatics’ critiques of Timmy and sense there will be more stringent evaluations of his performance as Dylan than Rami Malek, Gary Oldham, or Renee Zellweger got for their Oscar winning performances as Freddy Mercury, Winston Churchill, or Judy Garland.  Maybe the safest way to Oscar-land is to portray dead people?  Can you tell I am aching for Timmy’s talent to be acclaimed by his peers?

[txmel]

Too Late

Rami Malek x Reader

Word count: 3,415

Warnings: Angst, smut, alcohol, and a little fluff

Summary: Your relationship with Rami ended years ago when he walked out the door, but one night a drunken confession at a bar changes everything when realizations surface. Does he feel the same or is it time to finally move on?

*It’s about time! School kept this on the shelf for a long time. This is my first attempt with smut, so forgive me! Anyway, here it is.

You sat there peeling at the label of your near empty beer bottle. You’d hoped the previous six would provide a distraction to the scene currently in front of you. Emphasis on the word “hoped”.

Rami’s mouth occupied the girl’s ear as he whispered which were probably flirtations coated with sexual innuendos. You knew because seven years ago, that girl was you.

Each girl you saw him with would always be the same. A carbon copy of the next one. You knew these sorts of relationships wouldn’t last, but it didn’t make the sting hurt any less. He had obviously moved on in these past few years, isn’t time you did too?

You closed your eyes, allowing the alcohol to help you drift away.

Alternating whispers of seductive phrases into your ear. Nips at your lobe. Heated breath on your neck. Chills shooting straight through your body. Rami had always been so damn good at that. His hand continually making its way up your thigh. Your legs opening wider for him. Your body on fire. His fingers slowly approaching where you needed him. His mouth on yours, swallowing your whimpers of pure and total pleasure. Tugging his curls, causing him to speed up his movements.  His fingers reaching your underwear, pulling them aside to place them inside of you. Pumping two fingers in and out of you, faster and faster. His thumb rubbing harder against your clit. Climbing higher and higher to the edge. “Come on, baby girl. Cum for me. Y/N, cum for me. Now.”

A loud bout of laughter came from the carbon copy across the table, shattered your fantasy and caused you to nearly fall out of your chair. Thankfully, no one at the table noticed, too caught up in random, drunken conversations. But you had your overindulgence of alcohol as your excuse if need be.

When you looked up, their lips began to move against each other, their tongues demanding entrance. You could smell the lust from where you were sitting. It was all too much and the emotional rubber band inside you finally snapped. Suddenly, the bar became over stimulating. The dimmed lights too bright. The half-filled bar too loud. Your chest began to tighten. You needed to leave. Now.

You nudged Sami’s shoulder and told him you needed some air as you took your jacket hanging on the chair. Before your feet could move, Sami gently grabbed your arm and asked if you were okay. Your eyes met Rami’s, and you sensed his concern and saw his hand reach from across the table. Before he could open his mouth, you closed your eyes and turned to Sami.

“Really, I’m fine. I promise I just need some air.”

You headed for the door and as you raced toward the exit, you could hear Rami’s voice shouting your name across the bar. Your feet couldn’t move fast enough. It was fight or flight to get outside n order to avoid him.

As you pulled on the handle and made it outside under the roof of the cloudless night sky, all you could think was: Please don’t let him come after me. Please don’t. God, I can’t do this right now. You prayed the heavens would allow you this one small favor.

Breathing in the cool night air, you leaned against the brick wall of the building and allowed gravity to pull you to the ground. You could feel the light breeze brush across your flushed cheeks, and you felt your heartbeat slow to a normal rhythm. But as you sat there, enveloped by the coolness of the fall weather, thoughts began to surface.

God, how many times are you going to put yourself through this? Is he worth all of it? What you had was over with a long time ago. It’s just the alcohol talking. You’re just lonely. You need to let these feelings go. He was the one who walked out the door and left you alone, broken and without any answers. He shut that door. Why can’t you just leave it closed? Move on with your life. Just. Move. On. Rami obviously has, why can’t you?

Your head fell into your hands as the dam of tears finally broke. You wanted to run away, but the emotional heaviness of tonight held you hostage to the concrete and wouldn’t let you pull yourself up.

A shoe drumming against your leg and a clearing of a throat cut off your thoughts. You didn’t even need to look up to know who the owner was.

“This seat taken?”

Shit.

You were too drunk to be having this conversation with anyone right now. You were physically and emotionally trapped.  You had to suck it up and talk to someone. Confessing was the only way for you to begin to move on. And of all people, you were glad it was him.

You wiped your tears away and rubbed your hands on your jeans. Your head shook as he claimed the empty spot next to you.

“I’m fine, Sami. The bar was too noisy.”

“Liar.”

You looked up at him with puffy, red eyes. “The smoke was irritating my eyes.”

“Strike two”, gesturing to the rubbed off mascara currently smeared under your eyes and hands.

It was no use lying to Sami. He and Rami had a gift for seeing right through you. While it was usually annoying, right now you were thankful for it. As you put your head on his shoulder, you knew what he was going to say.

“Sami, please don’t say…”

And then he said it. The words you were trying to avoid it all night.

“You have to tell him Y/N.”

You lifted your head and looked at him. “What? That I’m still in love with him? Sam, what your brother and I had ended a long time ago. Have you forgotten he’s the one who ended it? Since then our lives have gone in completely different directions. And when am I exactly supposed to tell him, huh? When he’s off filming? During magazine interviews? Photoshoots? This isn’t something you confess to someone over the phone or a text.”

“Y/N, you’re still in love with my brother. And right now, he’s sitting in there and your job is transferring you across the country next month. You have to tell him. He needs to know. He has a right to know.”

“What would be the point of telling him now because he’s obviously moved on”, you said pointing to the bar. “Plus, how would I even tell him? ‘Hey Rami, you remember when we broke up five years ago? When you broke my heart? Well, I haven’t stopped loving you and now I’ve got to get on this plane to move across the country. Bye.’”

Sami didn’t say anything. He just nodded and you knew he understood.

“Sami, as I see it, this move is a chance for me to finally move on from him and to start over. Trust me, It’s better this way. It’s too late for us.”

You took a deep breath as you continued: “Just promise me you won’t tell Rami. please. It’s better for him. Better for me. And as hard as it is, I know that now and I think I can finally accept it. There is no future for us.”

An available cab could not have pulled up any sooner. It was your saving grace. And as you stood up, he steadied you and pulled you into a comforting embrace. “Are you sure this is what you want, Y/N?”

“Yeah, I think it is.”

He pulled away and his eyes concentrated on yours. No doubt trying to read right through you. “You don’t sound so sure. I still think you should…”

You cut him off before he could finish. “Bye, Sam.”

“Text me when you make it home Y/N.” And with a nod of your head and kiss on his cheek, you walked away.

As much as you wanted to, you didn’t turn around. Instead you pulled your jacket tighter against your body and slid inside the cab.

What you saw as the cab pulled away was a future with Rami that could and would never be. You had such dreams for the two of you. But like you said, it was too late. Everything you had wanted with him had dissipated. He had made the decision to walk away from the relationship for the sake of his career. And it’s time you did the same. As you wiped away the remnants of tears, a pang of realization punctured your heart: You didn’t want to let him go…but you had to.

Your mind was made up.

What you didn’t see was Sami shaking his head and turning around to head back into the bar. He didn’t make it far, because standing outside the door was his brother.

“Is there something you need to tell me, Sami?”

______________________________________________

Sleep didn’t come easy to you that night. Every time you closed your eyes, all you saw were flashes of Rami. You tried to find the strength to fight each of them away. But there was one that continued finding its way to the forefront:

Lately, you felt his career shoving you to the side. It didn’t come all at once, but the pieces began to add up.

Late night shoots, missed date nights, empty and broken promises.

On those late shoots, Rami was replaced with a pillow. It was a poor substitute, but you clung to it anyway. You would often find him sleeping on the couch the next morning and he always made the excuse he didn’t want to wake you. But you knew it was more. He was pushing you away. You refused to believe this was the end and so you let it go on and on.

You were only delaying the inevitable, but you couldn’t let go. Just like that pillow, you clung to denial. It was better than facing the truth. Rami’s pushing you away was your reality you just couldn’t accept.

Then one night you finally pushed back. If he wouldn’t fight for this relationship, you sure as hell would. Confronting him was the only option you had left. This push led to an explosive argument and a final slamming of the door to you what you and Rami had.

He left you alone, wondering what the hell you did wrong and how else you could’ve fixed it.

But the decision had been made tonight and there would be no turning back. You were finally ready to let go of Rami. It was your turn to slam the door shut and leave him behind.

______________________________________________

You didn’t realize you fell asleep until you were awoken by a banging on your door. According to your clock it was two in the morning. Dragging yourself out of bed, you shuffled your way to door, the darkness causing you to run into the kitchen table along the way.

As expletives left your mouth and your hand rubbed a possible bruise on your leg tomorrow, you switched on the hallway light and opened the door. Your mouth dropped as you looked at the late-night visitor currently standing at your door. Even though he was shrouded in shadows of darkness, his eyes were unmistakable.

“Rami?”

“Can I come in, Y/N?”

You nodded your head and ushered him in. You shut the door and turned to him.

As light from the living room encompassed him, you saw something you didn’t expect. His look earlier at the bar contrasted with what was the person currently standing before you. His previous flawless, coiffed curls were now disheveled. Bloodshot eyes. A tear stained face. You’ve seen Rami upset before, but this time was different.

“Rami, why, what, what are you doing here? Are you ok? You look like hell.”

“Is it really too late?”

You continued looking at him, completely thrown off by his question. “Well, it’s two in the morning and I was asleep, so I would say it’s probably…”

He looked up at you. “No, Y/N. I mean, am I too late?”

“Rami, what the hell are you talking about?”

“I know what you said to Sami.”

“Oh my God, I’m going to kill him. He promised me…”

“He didn’t tell me anything Y/N. After he had been gone for a few minutes, I started to worry and went looking for him. Well, for you actually. I overheard your conversation and when I confronted him, he said I needed to talk to you. So, tell me Y/N, are you still in love with me?”

You took a deep breath. You couldn’t believe you were going to have this conversation again tonight.

“Rami it was the alcohol. I had too much to drink. I’ve been single for a long time and sometimes I just miss being in a…a… relationship. Alcohol heightens… it heightens emotions.” You began verbally stumbling, picking up and trying to hold on to any words that came across your mind to form some sort of coherent sentence.

Rami wasn’t buying any of it. But that didn’t mean you were going to give up. “They were just…just drunken, desperate words. I didn’t mean any of it.”

“Liar.”

And with that, he pulled you flush against his body. Feeling his lips begin to move against yours, you gave in. But as you gave in to him, your late-night memories came flooding back. You broke the kiss and pushed him away.

“Why did you leave me, Rami? How could you walk away from us?”

“Y/N, I…”

You didn’t allow him to finish. You threw every heartbreaking memory at him. You didn’t hold anything back.

“I gave everything to you Rami. To us. I spent months tearing myself down wondering what I did wrong. You broke my fucking heart!”

He didn’t say anything. Tears fell from his eyes and his breath hitched as he took in what you were you saying. He knew he hurt you, but he never realized how deep the pain went.

“Y/N, Those nights you went to bed alone, I would come in and touch your cheek and tell you how much I loved you and how I sorry I was for putting you through this. I slept on the couch, because I couldn’t stand to look at you and see what I was doing to you. How much I was hurting you. I couldn’t stand doing those things. Putting my selfish needs before yours. I was putting my career first and I knew what I was doing was destroying us. Destroying you. So, I thought it would be easier to let you move on. You deserved better, Y/N. And I knew I didn’t deserve you.”

“Rami, why couldn’t you just tell me?”

He placed his hand on your face and began to stroke your cheek.

“I haven’t stopped thinking about you, Y/N. I love you. I’ve never stopped loving you. Walking out the door and breaking your heart was the worst mistake I’ve ever made. I’ve regretted it for so long. I’m so sorry for hurting you Y/N. God, I’m so sorry.”

Your knees were weak, you couldn’t breathe, and your mind was going in all different directions. This was what you longed for since the moment Rami walked out the door five years ago. For Rami to come swooping in and confess himself with those exact words: “I love you.” and “I’m sorry.”

Rami closed his eyes and when he finally looked at you again, he continued. “I’ll ask one more time and I will accept any answer you give me.”

He took a deep breath and locked his eyes with yours. “Y/N, are you still in love with me?”

“Yes.” And with that, you pressed his lips against yours. Every emotion you had for Rami, was put into that kiss. Forgiveness. Love. Passion.

He pulled away, but you spoke first. “Bedroom.”

Rami picked you up and instinctively you wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you into your room. Your lips never broke apart. And as soon as he set you down, your hands were all over each other.

Then he stopped and gently ran his thumb down the curve of your cheek. “You’re so beautiful”, he whispered.

You moved away from him and lifted your arms above your head and Rami knew it was his signal to remove it. Before your shirt even hit the floor, his hands and mouth were on your breasts. You let out gasp as his mouth found your nipple and gave a gentle suck to each one.

He knelt to the floor and you felt your shorts and underwear being pulled down and released from your body. As his mouth and fingers found your center, he could feel how you were ready for him. “You’re so wet for me.”

All you could do was moan a simple “always”. Your whole body began to shake as two fingers entered you and started pumping in and out. The only thing keeping you on solid ground, was your tight grasp on his curls.

Rami could feel the weakness in your legs. “Lay down for me, Y/N.”

You didn’t think twice. This was what you wanted. Your body craved him.

Rami removed his clothes piece by piece, his eyes never let go of yours. As he pulled down his boxer briefs, you could see how he was ready for you. The bed began to dip when he crawled to where your trembling and aching body was waiting for him.

A sound escaped your mouth when his lips found their way to your core and Rami began sucking on your clit. Your body was already shaking as he lapped at your juices. As you latched onto his dark curls, you heard deep moans escape his lips, which drove you harder and faster toward your release. And there you were: back arched, loud pants escaping your mouth, head thrown back in pleasure.

As he pumped two fingers in and out of you, you heard: “So beautiful like this. Come on baby…” Rami’s fingers began pumping faster and faster. “Cum for me…now.”

Your body immediately let go and exploded into an earth-shattering orgasm.

Rami sat up on his haunches and watched you as you came back down. “God, you’re so breathtaking.”

You didn’t need to ask if he was ready. You grabbed his face and pulled it towards you until his lips connected to yours. You began begging for him. “Rami, please. I need you in me, now.” He barely had time to blink and then your right hand reached for his hardened, leaking cock and guided it to your entrance.

As he entered you in one thrust, an explosive cry permeated the room.

He began moving slowly in and out of you, savoring the feeling of finally being inside of you. “You feel so damn good. So tight…so perfect…”

But for you, it wasn’t enough. “Please, Rami. Faster. Harder”

As he picked up speed, you wrapped your legs around him, pulling him closer. “Rami…”, you moaned.

“That’s it baby. Let go. I’ve got you.”

You both became lost to the euphoric desire that swallowed you whole. “Shit, Y/N. I’m gonna cum.”

You still weren’t there and a fear of him leaving you behind again overtook you. As he neared the edge, he heard your desperate appeal. “Wait for me. Rami, please. I want to cum with you. Don’t leave me.” Tears filled your eyes as you continued. “Please. Please don’t leave me again”, you sobbed.

As Rami heard your cries, he began to slow down his movements. “Y/N, ente habebite. Look at me”, he breathed. He wiped a single tear away from your cheek. “I love you. I love you so much and I promise I will never leave you again my love. I promise.”

Rami reached down and began rubbing your clit. “Cum with me baby. I’ll wait for you.”

You shouted out each other’s names as your orgasms crashed into each other.

Still inside you, he pulled you into a gentle kiss that soothed your soul and put your heart at ease.

You both came several more times before dawn broke the darkened sky. Before sleep claimed your sated, entangled bodies, your eyes met his and you saw something in them.

What you saw in his was a future with Rami that could be. That would be.

It wasn’t too late.

Tag list: @sherlollydramoine @xmxisxforxmaybe​ @alottanothing​ @diasimar​ @moon-stars-soul​ @hah0106​ @sassystrawberryk​ @edteche2​ @itswormtrain​ @neverendingstories00​ @sweet-symphony0​ 

I’m sorry if I forgot anyone!

[angstyandromanticwriting]

Josh Washington X Reader Hidden feelings to love confession prompt

!TW: Implied swearing ‘cursing’, swearing!

“What?” Josh asked, confused by the expression on your face.

“Don’t you remember telling me you didn’t want to date?” You inquired, and Josh winced, looking away from you.

“N-No?” Josh answered, clearly lying; he was embarrassed.

You giggled, before you placed your hand on his. “I’m - Happy for you, anyway,” you claimed, and Josh smiled his thanks to you.

☾༒☯︎︎

Josh had been planning a party, and he’d requested for you to get some stuff for him, but you were stressed out as you woke up late on the day, and were rushing to get the items, so you got some which were wrong and some which you’d gotten too little of. Josh rubbed the back of his neck as he tried to think, and you wouldn’t dare lift your head to look at him; you felt awful for messing things up. “Next time we probably need to talk things through before the day,” he mused, and you nervously fidgeted with your hands, cursing yourself internally.

“I’m so sorry, Josh,” you whined, “I just - I woke up late, and I misunderstood the list-”

Josh shook his head, smiling reassuringly at you. “It’s not your fault,” he interjected, “I made it sound way too complicated, and I suppose auto-correct is partially to blame, too.”

You agreed, managing a weak smile up at him. You tried to think of something to say, reminding yourself of the tubs of ice cream in the blue plastic bag. “Hey, at least you have ice cream to last you for months, now,” you remarked, and Josh chuckled, nodding.

“Yeah,” he responded, “maybe after the party we can watch a movie together with it.”

“That would be great,” you replied, smiling shyly at him, “so - the party is still going ahead?”

“Of course,” Josh answered, “we just need to get a few more things, that’s all.”

“Do we have time?” You asked, and Josh nodded, before he grabbed his coat and hat as it had been snowing recently, and it was freezing outside.

༒☯︎︎༒

Josh noticed that you seemed down recently, and he wondered what was wrong as you’d been trying to avoid him and even your best friend, Alice, so he decided to catch you when you were sitting alone in the cafeteria. “What’s going on with you recently?” Josh inquired, and you frowned, looking away from him as you tried to think about what you should tell him; you were too afraid to tell him about your feelings for him.

“It’s just - Something my ex said,” you murmured, and Josh scowled.

“What did he say?” Josh questioned, and you would be worried when he stood up. “I’ll beat the shit out of him,” he uttered, and you stood up, catching his arm.

“He - He didn’t say anything, I - I just,” you whined, “I lied, Josh.” Josh would visibly relax, glancing back at you. You drew a shaky breath, looking anywhere, but him. “I - I was too scared to tell you before-..” You murmured, your voice faltering.

“Y/n, what’s going on?” Josh pried, concerned as he placed his hand on your shoulder.

You hesitantly let your dark eyes meet his brilliant green ones, and you felt a little bit more comfortable; his eyes were a great provider of comfort to you. “I-..” You began nervously, rubbing your arm. “I think I’m - In love with you,” you murmured, and Josh would be surprised, but also relieved as he thought you didn’t feel the same way.

Josh frowned when he noticed that you were crying, and he wrapped his arms around you; you thought that things would never be the same again; that you’d lose him. “I’m so glad you told me that,” he responded in a genuine and jokey voice as he held you at arm’s length, and you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling when you noticed the mischievous glint in his eyes, “I was about to go and beat your ex up.” You giggled softly, lowering your head partially. “But, seriously,” he began, “I - I think that’s great, because - I think I’m falling in love with you, too.”

You would be surprised, lifting your head to look up at him, your eyes wide. “Really?” You replied; you never thought he’d feel the same way for you.

Josh nodded, placing his hand on your cheek as he smiled warmly at you. “We both waited all that time thinking that we didn’t want each other,” he mused, and you nodded gravely, your eyes locking with his.

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed this prompt! ❤️

[safin-supremacy]

Lyutsifer Safin X Reader Angsty prompt with a slightly happier (but not extremely happy) ending

!Potential TW: Mention of broken leg!

“Why are you doing this?” Safin asked, his voice weak.

You grunted, turning to face him sharply. “I’m doing this because you promised me you’d change!” You cried, and Safin frowned when he remembered.

Safin became desperate, stepping closer to you. “I - I will this time,” he claimed, “I’ll stop the operation, I swear on my own life, just please don’t leave me.”

You hesitated, before you stepped closer to him, too. “You really mean it this time?” You asked, and Safin nodded quickly, reaching for your hand, which you allowed him to hold this time. “Fine,” you concluded, “I’ll stay, but if I find out that you’re still running the-”

“I’ll be dead if I continue it,” he stated, “I swore on my own life, remember?” You nodded, before you wrapped your arms around him, hoping he meant it this time. Safin returned the hug, relieved that he hadn’t lost you.

𖧷☭𖤍

Safin’s workers had been rude to you again, but he hadn’t seen it this time, so he was unaware of it when he found you curled up on the bed, staring ahead of you. “Y/n?” Safin broke the silence, his voice full of concern for you as he sat on the edge of the bed beside you, lifting his hand to gently stroke your hair; he knew you liked it when he did. “What’s wrong, angel?” Safin inquired, and you glanced up at him for a moment, wondering if you should tell him, or not.

“It’s nothing,” you lied, but Safin didn’t believe you; he knew something was wrong.

“Tell me,” he insisted, “my angel shouldn’t be upset. Who did this to you, angel?”

You sighed, deciding to give in and tell him. “It - It was those men again,” you answered, and he scowled, remembering them from last time he caught them treating you poorly.

“You can’t listen to them, angel,” he responded, “they’re just jealous of you.”

Safin gently eased you closer to him, and you smiled weakly up at him. “I’m still surprised,” you mused, changing the subject.

“By what?” Safin inquired, curious.

“By how you aren’t who I thought you were when I first met you,” you clarified, beginning to sit up partially so you could place your hand on his left cheek, and he subconsciously leaned into your touch, “you’re caring, sweet, and sometimes you can be funny, too.”

Safin chuckled, flattered. “What was so wrong with me before I changed?” Safin questioned, though he knew that there were a few things wrong with him, and you lifted an eyebrow.

“You broke my leg once,” you reminded him, and he winced, feeling guilty again.

Safin placed his hand on your knee, rubbing it as if to apologise to your leg for breaking it before. “I’m sorry, angel,” he replied, “I should never have done that to you.”

You smiled reassuringly up at him, and he managed a faint smile back. “It’s okay,” you stated, “that’s in the past now.”

𖧷☭𖤍

You would be concerned when you found Safin looking down this time, sat in the poison garden with his head bowed slightly. “Hey,” you broke the silence, and he hesitantly looked back at you, before he looked ahead again. “Are you okay?” You asked, sitting beside him on the step.

“I’m sick of trying,” he murmured, and you glanced over at him.

“Trying to do what?” You pried, tilting your head partially.

“Forget them,” he answered, his voice weak. You frowned, placing your hand on his; you knew he was referring to his family.

“I know it’s hard,” you responded, “but the pain will ease up, I promise. I - I can’t promise that it will go completely, but - it won’t hurt as much as it once did.” Safin tried to believe you, smiling softly at you, before he wrapped his arms around you, and you returned the hug to comfort him.

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed this prompt! ❤️

[xmxisxforxmaybe]

You and Rami are fuck buddies. You both are at a Hollywood party and Rami gets jealous when he sees another celeb ask you out. Hardcore angst ensures. (Rami banging on your door in the middle of the night for bonus points lol)

Third person POV for a change 🖤

* * * * *

Her sweet laughter trilled through the air, normally like the refrain of Rami’s favorite song, but tonight, it was like an arrow that shot straight through his gut.

His grip tightened around the expensive glass that held his whiskey sour, a few drops of it sloshing over his fingers.

Rami watched her laugh again, his eyes staring as she leaned into a handsome actor who was much taller, much younger, and much whiter than him.

He brought his drink to his lips, savoring the alcohol as it washed over his tongue, knowing he’d need at least five more before he could ever forget the way she just touched handsome’s bicep. She used to touch Rami like that at these kind of parties, used to lean into him, her laughter a breath that ghosted along the shell of his ear.

Rami knew he had never defined his relationship with the beautiful woman who could turn the heads of damn near everyone in the room, and he knew he had laughed when she asked if he had wanted something more.

“Do you mind if we keep it casual? My life is just … crazy now. I don’t want to force you into that kind of chaos.”

“I understand, Ram. And I appreciate that—I really do. You know I love being with you, right?” she asked as she sat on his lap while his hands kneaded the flesh of her ass.

“I do know that,” Rami said in a raspy, whisper-soft voice as she lowered her lips to his, kissing him with heat, with unabashed need.

They were a sight to behold as they writhed together on Rami’s sofa that afternoon. Insatiable, starved for one another as they fucked again and again.

Rami thought he could love her, just like this, without getting too close.

She thought she could love him, just like this, without getting too close.  

Buried under the covers, she was fast asleep so the pounding on her door had morphed into thunder and she was running, running for cover as the claps came faster and faster and—

Blinking awake, she quickly realized that it wasn’t thunder.

Someone was pounding on her door.

Reaching for her phone, she saw she had five missed calls and an infinite number of missed texts from Rami.

*Bam*

“Open the fucking door!”

*Bam*

She rushed out of bed, praying to all the gods the neighbors weren’t awoken by Rami’s incessant banging.

“Rami—what the hell?”

“Is he here?” he slurred, his wild eyes, even bigger than usual, roving over her still-dark apartment.

“Is who here?”

“Him,” he spat out. “Mr. Sexy, Muscull-Musecul-MUSCLEY, White n’ Bright?”

“What the fuck are you talking about, Rami? You’re wasted,” she said, a look of disgust creeping over her pretty face.

“The guy you were all over at the party tonight,” he bit back as he walked into her bedroom and yanked the covers back, searching for a man who had never been there.

“Still warm!” he yelled as he touched the sheets before he stumbled into the bathroom and yanked the shower door open.

“Because I was asleep in my bed, peacefully, I might add!” she shouted as she gave up on following him and flopped back into bed.

Rami appeared in the doorway of the bathroom, framed by the light. His eyes were bloodshot, his shirt stained, which was no surprise, and his hair was messy, as if he’d been running his hands through it for an hour.

“Are you quite done?” she asked, laying her phone back on her nightstand.

“He’s … not anything like me,” Rami mumbled, gripping both sides of the doorframe to stay upright.

“No, he isn’t.”

“That whatchu want—someone mainstream?”

“Rami, I want you. Quit being an overdramatic dick, take off your disgusting clothes, and come to bed,” she said as she scooched over and made room for him.

He narrowed his eyes in disbelief.

“Forgot to check the closet.”

She sighed and rolled over, listening as he struggled out of his clothes, two loud thuds telling her that he was having a very hard time.

After much longer than it should have taken, Rami stumbled into her bed, his cold fingers sliding over the bare skin of her arm.

“I hate this,” he mumbled.

“Hate what?”

“Wonderin’ if you’re here with someone else.”

“Do you want to be exclusive, Ram?”

“Fuck yes.”

“Poof! We are exclusive,” she said as she raised her arm in the air before letting it fall again.

“Pooooof,” he whispered as he snuggled into her back, his open mouth emitting a soft snore no less than a minute later.

She wondered just what she’d signed up for, but it didn’t stop her from grinning as she brought his fingers to her lips and pressed a kiss to them, silently chuckling as she tasted the remnants of a whiskey sour.

[borhap-au]

Argument. Rami Malek x reader.

From the very beginning this relationship hasn’t been a calm one. After Rami and Lucy split up, a big part of his fandom was angry about it, ready to blame anyone who came in their way. Unfortunately for you, you became their victim. You were around Rami for some time, but never thought he could actually get interested in you. You were... an assistant of an assistant, actually. Your job wasn’t a very important one, but at least you got a chance to meet some stars. And of course to be around Rami from time to time. 

You weren’t that vicious femme fatale that some people wanted to see in you. You didn’t come between Rami and Lucy, actually, when he started giving you more attention, they were already all done. Even despite the fact he was single, you still didn’t flirt back. Not because you weren’t interested, but simply because you were too shy. You thought he was joking and you didn’t want to make a fool out of yourself. But he was being serious and he didn’t give up. Eventually, he got your number. There was a first date, second date... When you finally decided to be together, you still tried to keep your relationship private from the press. Unfortunately, it didn’t work. And after the papers, there came the internet. And all of his fans had an opinion about you.

You deleted all of your social media, but even that wasn’t enough. Every now and then some mean comments got to you and Rami. It didn’t make things easier in your relationship, on the contrary. There was always a hidden tension, ready to explode. You knew finally you’ll tell each other what you both thought about all this. It was a matter of time. 

It started with him not showing up to his birthday party you were planning for weeks, because he had to stay abroad to film. Then there was your anniversary he totally forgot about, because he was tired, again because of work. He just thought it was next week and slept throughout most of that day because he tried to recover from shooting intense scenes. Joe was aware of what was going on between you two and made sure Rami will remember about your birthday, but your boyfriend also promised you a trip to Greece you were very excited about. Unfortunately, a few days before it, he told you that another thing poped out and he just won’t be able to go. 

“If you want to, you can still go. There are two tickets. You can take a friend with you, that’s not a bad thing either, is it?” he smiled, trying to make the situation better. He was getting ready for work and didn’t have much time for arguments. 

“You know, Rami, the only difference is, I see my friends all the time. We spend most of our time together, but how would you know, since you’re never home? It’s you I wanted to go on vacation with. I haven’t seen you in ages. We live in the same flat and it feels like it’s a long-distance relationship. I never see you anymore. We don’t date. We don’t make love. Fuck, we don’t even talk!” he sighed quietly. 

“I know, and I’m not happy about it either. But it’s the job, it’s been killing me-”

“So if it kills you, why would you want to continue doing it?” you put your hands on your hips.

“Because someone has to pay the bills.”

“Oh, but we could pay the bills just fine if we had a smaller flat. You’re just used to this luxurious life. You like the splendor and all those people looking at you envying you.”

“You didn’t seem to mind it when I spent money on your shoes and your jewellery.”

“Oh, you- You asshole.” that was the moment you really had enough. You were mad at him for saying that. Maybe you weren’t a rich person, but you were a proud one. You never asked anyone for money, didn’t want to be anyone’s sugar baby. You paid for your clothes and other things, Rami just liked giving you presents, despite the fact you never asked for anything. Therefore it really pissed you off that he mentioned something like that.

“I thought we talked about it already. I thought you understood what dating an actor means.”

“Dating an actor, yes, not dating an asshole.”

“You still don’t get it. Not even a little bit. It was so much easier dating Lucy, actresses just understand-”

“You did not just say that. You did not-” your eyes immediately got filled with tears. He saw that and tried to hold your hand to calm you down, but you didn’t let him. You fastly walked past him and got out of the house. He wanted to run after you, but he got a call from work saying he has to be there asap, because being late is not tolerated. He sighed and promised himself that he will apologize after he comes back.

After work they usually went for a drink, just to relax a bit after work, but this time Rami declined his co-stars offer and went straight home, only stopping to buy you flowers on the way back. He got home and immediately wanted to go to you and apologize, when he heard you talking. 

“I know you would like to go to Greece with me, but I don’t think we should. It’s his money, and if he thinks I’m a parasite living off his money, then I shall prove him wrong.” a moment of silence. “Connected? Me and him? Apparently by money. No guy that loves a girl tells her things like this, keeps on forgetting or postponing their plans and is never present. I think it’s simple. I mean no, it’s hard. It’s difficult as fuck even to admit it, but it’s obvious what’s going on. There is nothing connecting us anymore apart of the flat and the status we have in the press. He doesn’t-” a little quiet sigh and you continued, unwilling to admit that even to yourself. “I think he doesn’t love me anymore.”

Rami was shocked. Sure, because of the success of Mr Robot and Bohemian Rhapsody his career escalated quickly, and he didn’t have nearly as much free time as before, but it didn’t mean his feelings toward you changed. He didn’t want to be with anyone but you and he was really happy. Actually, he admired you for sticking so long with someone who’s always gone. He loved you for how patient and understanding you were. He would never suspect what you showed him wasn’t the truth. That was the moment he understood he should’ve paid more attention to you and show you more love. The only thing was... It was probably too late.

“What do you mean how do I feel? I feel the same as I did. Of course I missed him terribly when he was gone, but I was always happy to have him back. I love him. There is no one else I imagine being with right now and I know there will be a long way recovering from a broken heart, but I think we both know what happens now.” a quick break and you started again. “It doesn’t matter what I really want. If it was about what I want, he would be here, with me, always. I don’t see any chances for this relationship anymore. I think this is it. When he comes back, I’ll just tell him I’m breaking up with-” you stopped when you heard a little sob coming from another room. Your heart stopped at the thought he heard your entire conversation. You never wanted him to hear it like this, over the phone with somebody else. “I- I gotta go. Talk to you later, ‘kay?” you hanged up. Slowly, so you can figure out what to say on the way, you stood up and went to the other room. 

Rami was sitting on the floor, his face hidden in his hands. He was crying. You spotted colorful roses laying on the floor near him. It was almost an aesthetic view, if you forgot about the part that your heart was breaking into million pieces.

You sat on the floor next to him and hugged him tightly. For two or more minutes he didn’t move at all. When he calmed down a little and fastly wiped his tears, he rose his eyes on you. You looked at him, also crying. He pressed his cheek to your chest, hugging you tightly, as if it was the one last time. You pet his head. 

“Is there really no chance for us?” he tried to say, but his voice cracked. 

“Perhaps... I was too quick with my judgement.” you whispered regretting every single word you said. 

“I don’t want to lose you, Y/N. I really care for you. I never met anyone like you before, you are just so special to me. I love you. I do, I really do. You may not believe it, I wouldn’t be surprised. I acted like a dick towards you. Now I see it clearly. I wasn’t here for you when you needed me, actually, I wasn’t here at all. We were drifting apart from each other for a really long time now. Wish I could see it before. I would try to safe it. If given even a little chance, I would try my best for you. I promise.”

You looked at him crying. You didn’t think you’ll ever forgive yourself for breaking his heart. You wished you heard him coming. You wished you were in a different room, somewhere where he couldn’t hear you saying all that. Or if he just came back home before you called your friend. You couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore. You knew you screwed up. Badly. And all you wanted to do was to take it all back. 

“Rami-” 

“If there was the slightest chance, even a little one, that you could, perhaps, ever give me a second chance... Please. Please, I promise you, I will do anything I can. I will even set the Hollywood sign on fire if that can bring us back together. Please. I’m begging you. I can’t do it without you. I don’t want to do it without you-” 

“Rami, baby, please. Shhh” you cupped his face in your hands and kissed his forehead. “Shhh. I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying.”

“You mean it?” he looked at you wiping his tears. Then he wiped yours when you nodded your head.

“I am. I’m staying.” he hugged you tightly.

“I thought I lost you forever, babygirl.” 

“You almost did, Rami. You are such a good actor I believed you don’t care for me anymore. That you don’t need me, don’t need anyone. But now I see how you really feel. I’m sure again that you love me and it means the world to me. I just needed your attention and a little reassurance. I thought I’m losing you and now you see how bad that feels. But we will be stronger after this. Let’s just stop pretending everything’s alright when it clearly isn’t.”

“Let’s just start saying that. ‘I need attention.’ I’m sure it’s gonna make things much easier for us.”

“We will.” you nodded, smiling and petting his cheek.

“Go with me.” 

“Hmm?” you raised your brow.

“Go with me on the press tour around Europe. It’s a trip. We can have fun. I promise not to overwork myself so we can go sightseeing. Please?” you smiled and hugged him tightly.

“I’d love to.” he smiled to you and softly kissed your lips. You immediately kissed him back. 

[r-ahh-mi]

He // Chapter 7

Prompt  II Chapter 1 II Chapter 2  II  Chapter 3 II Chapter 4 II Chapter 5 II Chapter 6 II

Pairing: Rami Malek x OC (Beth)

Warnings: Angst, Smoking, and Swearing

Word Count: 1.5k

-

I could feel the tears beginning to ripple out from my eyelids, but I quickly wiped them away and off of my skin, both due to frustration towards myself and because I heard a small rustling of dishes coming from the kitchen. It must’ve been one of the boys going to grab a cup of water or a midnight snack of some sort and the shock of finding me outside in combination with me crying was something i didn’t want either of them to see.

I cowered further backwards, hiding myself from the bright outdoor light so that I was now pulled back into the blackness of the natural light of the moon. I thought I was safe as I continued to puff away on my ‘cancer sticks’ as my New York acclimated body temperature basked in the warmth of California during the winter months, that is until the glass door of the patio began to quietly and slowly move until it was partially open.

I immediately fell into a panic as I tapped the burning end of my cigarette against the stonewall of the outside of the house; as if that would somehow evade the air of my existence.

“Jesus fucking Christ!”

Rami’s voice was half grumbled, half exasperated as his body visibly jumped an inch off the ground.

“I’m--i’m sorry.”

Rami rolled his eyes at my nervous words and I couldn’t blame him. I must’ve sounded like a teenage girl who had just gotten caught by a parental figure when I was a fully capable and free willing adult woman.

I thought Rami would immediately retreat inside, but he did the exact opposite, though he did it very reluctantly, but nothing seemed to come between him and his nicotine-it seemed that much hadn’t changed from the old and new rami.

As much as he could, he pretended my existence was obsolete as he walked over to the pool set in the back yard and sat his body down so his legs were dangling in the water. Though California still got pretty warm during the winter months, it was still much too cold to even fathom the thought of coming near a pool that was anything but temperature controlled, but Rami didn’t seemed to mind as he dipped his bare feet into the pool, letting his legs freely hang as he took a puff of smoke in and out of his lungs.

It was really quiet for quite some time and I wasn’t wholly upset with that. The silence couldn’t have been worse than if we both had tried to talk to one another which I could only imagine would be short, snarky replies or just pure awkward tension and us trying to work out some normality to a conversation when, we both knew, that wasn’t what we wanted to talk about.

I could feel the burn from the partially lit stick in my hand begin to press closer to my fingers as I tapped the remaining ash onto the cement ground. After I took the last drag of smoke I placed the cigarette in a nearby ash tray that was nearly full to the brim with cigarettes that didn’t look far off from being fresh. Of course, this made my heart feel cold for the boys, but mainly for the one who I used to think was my soulmate. He always did smoke more when he was stressed, sad, or mad and I knew he was probably taking in a pack a day, at the very least--Sami probably wasn’t faltering too far away from him either i’m sure.

Now that my cigarette was absent, there wasn’t much of a purpose for me to be lingering outside so I began heading for the patio door, doing my very best to not look at or bother Rami.

“Is this how it’s going to be?”

I paused with my hand pressed slightly firmer than before as his soft, yet graveled voice rang through my ears. 

I turned my body so that I was facing him, but only slightly as my one hip resting against the door and my other hip seemed to be pointing directly in Rami’s direction. 

“What do you mean?”

Though I didn’t see it, I knew Rami was rolling his eyes just based off of the tone of the groan that left his chest as he let his hand fall to the ground and tap out the butt of his cigarette against the pavement lining the pool. 

“You know what I mean,” he said with his back still facing me which only seemed to get the blood in my lips boiling some more as I coated them with a swipe from my tongue.

“Oh, I'm sorry! Am I the one who was completely ignoring you basically all day? Am I the one who has barely said a word to you even though you are the very reason I am here.”

“I did speak first.”

I rolled my eyes heavily in response just hoping that it was convince both him and me that I wasn’t feeling tears beginning to fill up the very tips of my eyes.

I was frustrated and angry and my body always thought it best to release those emotions with a prickling of water droplets landing on my cheeks--it was always something I hated because I wasn’t able to hide my emotions well because my body wouldn’t allow me that sort of satisfaction. As I prepared for my emotions to show through, I turned my face back towards the door, ensuring that he wouldn’t get the satisfaction of seeing what resulted from him pushing my buttons.

I grasped the silver handle and thought it best if I just went inside, back to the unfamiliar room and left to wither away on a bed that consistently had me tossing and turning. The latch had nearly made contact with the door until Rami came up, running nearly at top speed, and caught the metal door just before it was able to properly shut all the way. To say I was surprised was not an understatement, but what I felt was a bit more thorough than shock. For the first time ever, I couldn’t pinpoint why he was doing what he was doing and I didn’t just mean blocking me from shutting the door--not that that didn’t also leave me very puzzled. In general, I just couldn’t figure out who this Rami was and that’s what scared me the most.

I stood with eyes that I'm sure spoke louder for me than my voice could’ve ever done in this situation as Rami just peered down at me with the softest expression that i’d seen from him since my arrival. Without fragmenting his eyes away from mine, he moved just the slightest bit forward and closed the door behind him--I responded my moving backwards, allowing himself more room, but it seemed as though he wasn’t quite fond of my action.

“Please, can we just be civil.”

“Civil”, I scoffed as my arms instinctively wrapped themselves around my middle. “You expect me to be civil when you call me at an absolutely ridiculous hour with no reason to give, fly me out here, against, with no reason given, and then I get here and we act like this!”

“Like what?” Rami looked at my annoyed expression with one that couldn’t have been more opposite as he lowered his head so his gaze was stuck to the floor.

I couldn’t stop myself as my legs began to walk back and forth in a pacing motion.

“Rami..” I started then paused as to allow myself a brief moment of breath. “You didn’t even have the balls to come see me yourself. Your fucking brother had to come inside the fucking coffee shop and bring me to the car where you were nothing but uninviting to me.”

Rami didn’t so much mumble a response; all he could manage to do was thumb away at the button placed at the very tip of his flannel sleeve.

“How on earth do you expect me to  want to talk to you when you clearly don’t want anything to do with me.. You’re just--god, you’re confusing me so much right now.”

My eyes hadn’t crossed there way over to Rami ever since I started pacing, but as soon as the subdued, soft sounds of sniffling began to sway through the air, I halted my uneasy pace. Though his eyes were not visible to me, the repetitive nature of these sniffles were easy to give him and his emotions away and I could feel nothing but great dejection as my feet stopped in their tracks.

Contrary to the vigorous energy and anger I was both thinking and speaking verbally, I wanted nothing more than for him to be happy. My intentions were never to send him spirally down into some sort of pit filled with despair and regret (though, that didn’t sound too awful..but…) I simply just wanted to be up front, or better yet, be honest! 

Rami still had his face tilted parallel to the floor, but now these were just the thinnest paths leaking down from his eyes, cheeks, and chin. 

He was crying.

-

Tag: @lovelymalekk @mezzomercury @amcquivey @sherlollydramoine @rami-malek-trash @hazeleyedbeth @sassystrawberryk @cleopatra-knowles @xmxisxforxmaybe @soothysayer @moon-stars-soul @ramimedley @rawmemalek​ @hah0106​