#rafe and sofia edit

[lostsyren]

❦ Find me on TikTok: @syr3nedits

[loveflxwers]

rafe + sofia <3

[clubartaesthetic]

i'm offering whatever he wants

[nativegirltapes]

i love them :(

[aew-regression-cove]

Rafe Cameron x Sofia edit → by me!!! .•｡⁠*⁠♡*｡⁠•.

CLIPS + AUDIO FROM OBX3 + OBX4 USED!!!

— I really want them to be happy :3 <333

[sugarcandydoll]

omgggg aaaaa im so happy someone finally said thisss ♡🙈💕 was shipping rafe n sofia sooo hard ajgtgsk hoping we get more of em in szn 4 hehe ♡👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

“rafe wouldn’t be soft” or “rafe wouldn’t be like this for a gf” BRO HAVE YOU SEEN THAT MOFO WITH SOFIA??

THAT SMILE? And he literally opened up to her more than he has to anyone else in the damn show. Asking her for advice and shit. be so fr. That man is a softie with the right person.

EXHIBIT A:

EXHIBIT B, HIM LITERALLY ASKING HER ABOUT PERSONAL LIFE ADVICE. sum we’ve never seen him ever do

[coryndoll]

COY’S MASTERLIST

coryn / coy — eighteen ; new to tumblr. ex-wattpad addict. starting new series but never finishing them forever, ‘till the day i die. tag list

DREW STARKEY

┆ SERIES

LOVER OF MINE ( on hiatus ) ; you and drew, secretly exes, must fake date in order to keep the peace at a mutual friend’s wedding, but the forced proximity makes you two question whether you ever truly moved on.

CHRYSANTHEMUMS ( current work, ongoing ) ; in the midst of a zombie apocalypse, you reluctantly team up with former actor drew starkey on a journey to the rumored easthaven safe zone, where you must learn to trust and let your guard down as drew proves his worth and strength in your fight for a chance at peace and safety.

┆ONESHOTS

TOO HOT TO HANDLE ( fluff i guess? idk ) ; tasked with interviewing actor drew starkey about his latest movie, you unintentionally steal the spotlight, leaving him blushing and lost for words under your mesmerizing gaze.

RAFE CAMERON

┆SERIES

NOT SO BAD ( first work, on hiatus ) ; you and rafe absolutely despise each other in public but crush in secret. rafe is failing his humanities class & is assigned you as his tutor . . . maybe all it took for this relationship to form was just a bit of forced proximity and some time.

WAKING UP TO YOU ( current work, ongoing ) ; you wake up in a strange alternate reality that just so happens to be the outer banks universe, and to your disbelief, you’re suddenly in a relationship with the shows most unlikely character, rafe cameron. ─── edit

WHAT WOULD YOU DO FOR LOVE? ( current work, ongoing ) ; you become obsessively fixated on winning back your ex-boyfriend rafe, resorting to manipulative schemes—bribery, staged incidents, and calculated charm—to eliminate any threat to your reunion, believing you’re the only one who can truly protect him.

┆ONESHOTS

WHO DO YOU BELONG TO? ( smut ) ; rafe has a wet dream and wakes up his girlfriend with his mouth.

SAY MY NAME? ( smut ) ; you and rafe just can’t help yourselves.

SWEET ( requested, smut ) ; both yours and rafes family pick on him for being your choice of boyfriend. insecure, he lashes out, but you’re there to help him feel better.

LIES FOR LUNCH ( potential series ) ; you return to your hometown, the outer banks, to work as ward cameron’s assistant at cameron development, but living under his roof for the summer leads to unexpected tension with his son, rafe.

HOLD ME CLOSE ( requested, angst ) ; being big john’s kid and john b’s sibling isnt easy, especially when you’re dating rafe cameron. after your dad makes a comment about you and rafe, you’ve had enough and seek your boyfriend for comfort.

HATE TO BE LAME ( angst, inspired ) ; you are caught in a situationship with rafe, struggling to admit you might love him, constantly holding back your feelings while fearing that confessing could make things more complicated.

FRENCH 75 ( requested, angst ) ; six months after your breakup with rafe, he’s walking around the island with sofia. when being confronted by him after a few words are thrown around a conversation, you and rafe pour your feelings out.

ON THE WAY ( requested, smut ) ; on the way to morocco, rafe is knocked out by the pogues and tied up in a cabin in the boat. taking advantage of the opportunity, you sneak in to have some sex with your friends-with-benefits duo who’s initially irritated that he can’t even touch you, until he realizes that maybe it’s not such a bad thing at all.

[rafeyscurtainbangs]

Milkshake - Rafe Cameron One Shot

+18 Minor DNI

OlderPerv!Rafe x BestFriend!Reader

both are in their 30’s

⭐️ republished ⭐️

+18 Minor DNI

🪄 (spoilers) Cheating, swearing, name-calling, oral (male receiving), cum play, choking, Rafe’s a perv 🚩, has pictures and videos of reader w/out her consent, mentions listening to her masterbate,fetishizes simple things (reader licking whipped cream and drinking from a straw) because he’s a perv

📖 OlderPerv!Rafe is obsessed with his best friend (reader) and is willing to do whatever it takes to get you. Based off of an ask: Perv daddys best friend paying yn to only put the tip into her Because thats not really cheating on his wife it is not all the way in is it? But it feels so good too her and she just pushes herself all the way down rafe is totaly in awe as she starts riding him Her putting his hands on her tits

✨ “What?” You cut him off, pulling back a little, staring into his lust-blown eyes. He leans in, not wanting to explain any further. You take your hand, resting it on his neck, pushing him back to the headrest, making his eyes flutter shut. Rafe releases a primal groan, the vibrations felt against your palm. He likes this. You squeeze his throat a little tighter, making him moan. ✨

2.8 K lightly edited (<- mostly smut)

Reader’s POV:

“My mouth is watering, Rafe,” you groan. “This is torture.”

His eyes cut over to yours, rolling back in annoyance. “If you think you’re drinking a milkshake in my car, you’re crazy. I don’t even let my wife bring food in here. This ride is my baby. It’s ten-minute tops.”

“You don’t eat or drink in your car… ever?” You pout, poking out your bottom lip as you look around his pristine ride. The answer is so plainly written in the details.

“You can fuck up my bimmer, my G-Wagon, hell even my Escalade. Aight? Dealer’s choice. But you’re not eatin’ in the DB5.”

“Did this come with your mid-life crisis starter pack or what?”

Rafe sucks his teeth and laughs. “Yeah. Yeah. This and that fleshlight-“

“TMI!”

“TMI?” He gasps through a laugh. “It’s the only thing fuckin’ me these days. M’always in the doghouse. Always…”

“What did you do this time, Cameron?”

“Nothin’.”

“Bull-fuckin’-shit,” you retort. Rafe rakes back his hair nervously, scratching at his 5 o’clock shadow. Fuck, he’s handsome… You stare at him a little more. His head snaps your way, catching you with a smirk on his lips.

“You like what you see or what?” He challenges.

You roll your eyes and scoff. “What did you do, Ray,” you mimic his Sofia’s voice, making him cringe.

“Fuck, you’re too good at that. Don’t do that shit.”

“What?” You mock her again.

“Like nails on a chalkboard. I swear. Use your voice. Please.”

“Mhmm… If you let me eat in your car and IF you tell me why you’re in trouble.”

“You’re a nosy little shit. You know that?”

“Ray…” You breathe in her tone again.

“Shut up about your goddamn milkshake,” he huffs. “It ain’t gonna happen. What adult drinks a milkshake anyways?”

“It’s got booze in it.”

“And?” He sasses.

“Island Club makes the best mudslides. You know that. Stop stalling and tell me what’s up.”

“Fine! She found pictures on my phone. Okay?”

“Pictures?”

“Pictures.”

“Of what?”

“It’s personal.”

“Of who?”

“Leave me alone!”

“Pussy.”

“It’s none of your goddamn business. Alright?”

You turn toward him, dramatically swiping your finger across the whipped cream, bringing it to your mouth. Rafe’s eyes dart from you to the road and back. “C’mon, Rafey.” You slip your finger between your lips, leaving a little mess on the bottom. Rafe lifts an eyebrow in your direction, a smirk pulling on his perfect lips.

He punches the gas, making you grip your seat wide-eyed. “We’re almost there,” he smiles as his car barrels through the night. Your heart starts to race along with the speed of his Aston Martin, the pointer kissing seventy miles an hour.

“R-Rafe. The speed limit is twenty-five.”

“It’s optional.”

“Rafe!” You squeal, grabbing onto the door as you round a tight curve. He lets out a wild laugh, eyes trained on the road ahead as the engine roars.

“This is so fucking dangerous!”

“Please… You should have thought about it before you did whatever the fuck that was,” he groans. “And it isn’t dangerous, baby. You’re safe.” Baby…

The trees around you melt into the night as you fly by them. Nothing is visible but the road before you. Rafe doesn’t look frightened in the slightest, completely confident, blissed out even. “Where are we even going?” You spit.

“Our spot.”

“Our spot? What spot?”

“The spot where we smoked weed for the first time… Riddler Cove – Beach Access,” he blurts breathlessly. “You were wearin’ that little red bikini,” he smiles as he wets his bottom lip, twisting his hands a little tighter on the steering wheel as he recalls something from 16 years ago.

Rafe reaches for the speaker, cranking up the music. The bass bumps in your chest, dueling with the rapid beating of your heart. You see the Riddler Cove parking lot come into view, vast darkness stretching ahead as you near the water. He smiles in your direction, his mood changing in an instant. A shameful look spreads on his face as he slows his roll. “I should have asked,” he sighs. “I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Jesus Christ. Just give me a fucking warning next time,” you let out a nervous laugh, punching his arm hard. Rafe coasts down the route, sailing into the vacant parking lot. Your heart rate slows, and your grip loosens on the leather seat.

Rafe quickly cuts off the engine, turning toward you hastily, a shit-eating grin on his face. “Show me.”

”Show you what?“ You laugh lightly as you turn your body toward him again.

His eyes lower from yours, landing on your cleavage. Rafe’s breath hitches as he takes in the sight of your tits pressed together. ”Uhh.. That thing you did with the whipped cream. Show me again. It wasn’t fair… I didn’t get to see.“

Your cheeks burn from your smile. You shake your head dizzily. “No, Rafe.”

“Pretty please.”

“We’re friends. What the fuck do you wanna see that for?”

“Why did you do that in the first place? Huh? What do you expect from me?”

“I don’t know…” You scoff. “Perv.”

“‘Scuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“I’m no perv. I’m just a guy. Sue me.”

“If I do it again, will you let me have my shake in here?” You relax your head into the seat, fluttering your lashes.

“If you do it again, you can have whatever you want.”

“Depends then. Are you telling me your secrets?”

“You don’t wanna know.”

“I really, really wanna know,” you smile.

“Ugh. FUCK! Fine. They were… pictures of – well… Pictures of you.”

“We’re best friends. Why wouldn’t you have pictures of me?” You sneer as you think about his perfect little housewife.

“Uh… Yeah. Not those kinds,” he laughs weakly.

“Tell me. Please.” You throw your gaze down to the shake, hand drawing toward it slowly. Swiping again, you collect the sweet cream on your finger, bringing it to your lips.

Rafe’s gaze follows you closely, watching as it passes your lips, grazing your tongue. His lips mirror your own, slightly parted. You leave a little mess just like before. “Kelce,” he mumbles, too lost in the moment to even think straight.

“Excuse me?” You laugh breathily.

“Sorry – umm,” he fumbles as he watches your tongue slide across your lip. “You guys dated.”

“Duh,” you scoff.

“Been… Mmm,” he moans, watching you wrap your lips around the straw, watching you suck.

“Been?”

“I’ve been stealing your nudes off his phone for years.”

“Rafe!” You gasp through a broad nervous smile.

“Yeah – Yeah. You seem real upset about it, sweetheart,” he teases you as you try to act serious about it all.

“Why? I mean do you want me?”

“Obviously. I’d do anything. I mean anything to have you,” he sighs. “Even a little.”

“Even a little?” You ask, riding off the high of your beautiful best friend’s admittance. I mean, I should be upset, but I’m not. Not in the slightest.

“Just the tip. Please,” he pleads. “I’ll – I’ll pay you even.”

“Jesus, Rafe. Pay me? What the hell?”

“No – No. Stop. Think of it as a thank you. Okay? And it’s just the tip, so it’s not technically cheatin’.”

“Would your Sofia say the same?” You ask.

“Do you care?” He questions louder as he cocks an eyebrow in your direction. You think about it momentarily, shaking your head no before looking back into his beautiful blue eyes. “I don’t.”

“Yeah. That’s what I thought. So, please,” Rafe whispers, lessening the space between you.

“I should be upset about the pictures, Cameron,” you whisper as you match his movements.

“You really, really should be. But you aren’t,” he subsists as his lips hover mere inches from yours. Rafe’s hand works up your arm, toiling around the back of your neck. “10k.”

“10? Are you kidding?”

“I’ll make it 15 if you stop askin’ questions-”

“Deal.” His lips crash into his, taking your breath away. Mouths, parting; tongue, greeting his as you throw your seatbelt off. Rafe reaches for you, pulling you onto his lap. He grabs your hips, driving you closer. You can feel the chill of your wetness as your panties graze his belt buckle, making you moan softly into your kiss. Rafe smiles against your lips.

“20 if you just let me play a little,” Rafe hums like he snorted a line, finally getting his fix. “20 G’s.”

“Rafe…”

“I’m serious. No more questioning me. C’mon. Your moans sound so much prettier close like this-” he pants.

“What?” You cut him off, pulling back a little, staring into his lust-blown eyes. He leans in, not wanting to explain any further. You take your hand, resting it on his neck, pushing him back to the headrest, making his eyes flutter shut. Rafe releases a primal groan, the vibrations felt against your palm. He likes this. You squeeze his throat a little tighter, making him moan.

“Fuckkk,” he drawls. “You’re killing me,“ he rasps.

You lean in closer, brushing your lips against his, making him whine when you pull away slightly, causing him to chase your mouth. “How do you know what it sounds like when I moan, Rafe?” You whisper against his lips.

“I’ve heard it before. So, so, so many times…”

“How?”

“Through the wall, on my phone, out your window, behind a door. I know what it sounds like when you cum on your fingers, your vibrator, or a dick. Just – Just please don’t stop. I’m sorry. 40… Alright? 40k. 50 if you let me take off your clothes. Me. Not you.”

He rests his head on your shoulder, burying himself in your neck as you think. His lips press against your skin; wet kisses planted as he moves to your jaw, working his way back to your neck, sucking lightly. “You smell so damn good,” he groans hungrily, making you pulse below. “So perfect.” Your hands fall slowly down his chest, working lower and lower.

He breathes your name against your skin as your fingers graze over the top of his jeans; his cock, rock-hard underneath, making him suck in a breath. “Rafe,” you pant against his lips as your fingers continue to outline his length, working down his thigh.

His hands skim higher, pinching your lace thong between his fingers. “I’m begging you,” he pleads pathetically.

“Okay.”

“Okay? Seriously?”

Rafe grabs the door handle fast, pressing it open before you can change your mind. A strong breeze whips through the car as the two of you step out. Rafe shuts the door, quickly backing you into the vehicle as his hands work around your neck, kissing you deeper. His hips drive into yours, tongue slipping through your lips. You moan his name softly, making his hold on you even tighter.

His hands fall to your hips, gripping tightly, turning you away. Your hands rest against the driver’s side window as he works up your thighs, slipping under your skirt. You look over your shoulder, matching his gaze as he seizes your hips. You can feel his cock through his jeans, stiff against your ass. Rolling slowly, you work yourself against him, listening to his muttered praise. His fingers dig deeper, a bruising hold on your body that’ll surely leave marks.

“Fuck, baby,” he groans. Rafe reaches under your skirt, looping his long fingers around the string of your panties, pulling them over your ass. Rafe quickly grabs them from the ground, tucking them in his pocket for later. You feel the chill of your wetness against the open air, the warmth of his hand following close behind, gliding up your inner thigh, drifting closer and closer. Rafe’s thick fingers sweep up your wet pussy. “Shit…” He moans, huskily quickly stuffing them in his mouth, sucking you off. Rafe reaches forward and grabs your neck, pulling you back to his lips. He kisses you, causing chills to fall over your body and nerves buzzing from head to toe as you taste yourself on his lips. “Get in the back.”

Rafe grabs the door and pulls it open, letting you sink inside. He follows closely behind, snatching you and pulling you back onto his lap. You pinch the bottom of your dress, but he stops you. “You said I could-” He huffs. “We had a deal.” You give him a nod, and he smiles boyishly, pinching the little zipper between your tits, tugging it open achingly slow; Rafe hanging onto every moment. His mouth falls agape, eyes wide as he drinks you in. ”Goddamn,“ he groans as he tosses his head back, a broad smile painted on his lips.

You draw your mouth to his neck, kissing him roughly. He lets out a sinful chuckle, taking a grip on your ass, spanking you, circling your bare skin. “Mmm… Let me look at you, baby,” he says. Rafe bites his kiss-bitten lip, studying you carefully as his fingers trace up your spine slowly. He lands on the clasp of your bra, unfastening it. The fabric slips off your shoulders and onto his lap. His eyes follow the lace, journeying up your body again, landing on yours. He takes your nipple in his mouth, swirling and biting, before moving to the other side.

BEEP.

Your stomach drops. The gravity of the situation is setting in as you see a text notification from his wife. You pull away, grabbing your bra off his lap. “Hey. No – N-No. Stop. Please. Just – Just c’mon. I need this. Please. I need you-”

“Who said I was gonna stop?” You whisper as you toss your bra to the floor.

You lean over, grabbing his phone, declining his wife before flicking your finger a couple of times, angling it straight at the two of you, pressing record. “Did you just… Are we? Oh my god,” he babbles as you help him out of his polo. You let out an airy laugh, resting your hand against his chiseled chest, using the other to trace his signature gold chain.

“Am I recording this? Yeah. Yeah, I am,” you hum. Rafe’s heart bangs under your palm, the man unable to catch his breath. “Just the tip.”

“Just the tip,” he stammers as he races for his belt, quickly fighting with the button and zipper. Rafe strips down to his boxers, letting you do the rest. You tease him, taking your time, revealing his length inch by inch. His dick springs free, slapping against his toned stomach; his fat tip messy with precum. Your gaze flicks to his as you lower your mouth to his cock. Rafe’s lips part, eyes hooded. His thick breathing and moans fill the car. “Shit,” he hisses as you pull away, looking down at you with a mix of emotions. “55… 55k?”

You hover over his tip, running a line of spit onto the head of his cock. His muscles tighten, fist slamming down on the leather seat.

“60,” you tease.

“Just – just take it. The black one. Fuck the black card in my wallet. I don’t care. Anything you need… Anything you want… Anything you think about, it’s fucking yours.”

“I’m not taking your money,” you whisper, blowing lightly on his cock before swirling your tongue around his head, collecting his precum.

“Oh fuck,” he moans. Rafe’s mouth falls open, his long, thick dick cumming in ropes of white almost instantly. His apologies get caught in his throat as you lick a line up his stiff shaft, cleaning the mess. Rafe reaches for air as he watches you suck him off some more, using what remains to stroke his cock as you tap his tip against your tongue. He looks over at the phone in a fucked-out daze, smiling in satisfaction before throwing his head back. “Yeah… Yeah you are. You’re taking my goddamn money.”

He grabs you, pulling you into his arms, lips crashing into yours. Rafe wraps his strong arms around your body, pulling you nearer, his bare chest pressed against yours. Your heart races a little faster as your adrenaline starts to kick it. ”The tip?“ He asks hopefully between kisses, getting greedy, hoping you’ll cave and give him more.

“Only the tip,” you respire as you thrust your hand between the two of you, taking hold of his cock.

“I’ll take it,” Rafe whispers as his head meets your cunt. He lets out a deep groan, thundering in his chest. His eyes meet yours again. “This is for me?” He asks shakily. “Please say it’s for”

“You, Rafe. It’s all for you.”

He takes control, gripping his cock in his fist, running his fat mushroom tip through your slick folds, swirling softly on your clit. Rafe shudders in overstimulation but there’s no fuckin’ way he’ll stop for anything. He slows down slightly, a smile spreading on his lips as he glides lower.

“Mmm… Right there,” you whisper against his mouth as his head toys with your entrance. His lips press against yours as you widen your thighs, dropping down on his tip, feeling a big stretch.

“Fuck me,” he pants.

“Feels so good, Rafe,” you whimper.

“So damn good. Holy shi-” You sink lower and lower unable to stop yourself. Rafe lets out a long, drawn-out moan against your lips. “Oh… Oh fuck,” he stammers as he clutches your hips when you’re fully sat, pulling back to look at you in awe. He pushes you down a little more, making your eyes roll back in your skull, filled to the brim with him. The sight of your pleasure is almost too much to take.

The two of you watch as you rise up, Rafe’s thick cock glistening with your essence. You hook one hand behind his neck, leaning back slightly, gripping the leather seat. You start to ride him, grinding and bouncing on his big cock as his large hands hold onto your tits. Rafe grabs your hips and slap your ass; just playing with your body, worshiping your curves like he’s always wanted.

“I’m not gonna last – just keep going. Please-” He begs.

“Just keep cumming for me…” You moan as you start to roll your body, working him in and out of your soaked pussy, 60 thousand dollars richer.

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[ghostofwriting]

Kildare Split Part Four: in another life

Rafe Cameron x reader

Chapter 4: in another life

Note: Here's part four!! I'm still crying over TTPD. Down bad is so incredibly Rafeit's insane. Anyway!! I love you all so much, thank you for reading and being absolutely wonderful. This part covers the smau up until part 26. Good luck soldiers!!

Warnings: none, not edited, angst, swearing, sadness, julio, mentions of drugs, mentions of suicidal ideation.

Word Count:  6,722

Synopsis: Everyone has noticed that there's been a shift in how Kildare Split acts around each other. Rafe and Y/N used to be so close, they were always pictured together, and always shared stories of each other and for the last few years, there has been nothing from them. A behind-the-scenes look at what went down between everyone's favourite band.

Chapter 4: in another life 

It’s a nightmare. Everything feels off. The walls are caving in. His mouth feels as if he had chewed on cotton balls for the past hour. It’s spinning. He’s lost control of himself and he doesn’t know how he’ll get it back. 

It started because of the thought of them together. Forever. Married. Having kids and living happily ever after clawed and his chest and ate him from the inside out. It was an ugly feeling. He wanted to be happy for her. There was no way he could be. Not when he was so deeply in love with her. Not that he ever stopped. 

It was just one blunt. He stole it from Barry. He was careful not to disturb any of the other drugs he had in there. Careful not to look at them too long. He’s been good. Has been clean for more than two years without any missteps. And here he is high once again. It’s just weed he tells himself. It’s fine. He’s fine. 

They’re about to go onstage when Sofia loses her mind. She goes absolutely ballistic. He’s pulling her off to the side away from prying eyes.

“Stop. Relax. Let me explain.” Everything comes out in a jumble as he’s trying to balance his damn guitar and get her to stop flailing her arms everywhere. 

“There’s no explaining anything. We are over. We are so done, Rafe. Holy shit I cannot believe I put up with your crazy obsession with your friend who by the way you didn’t even date. You’re insane.” 

“Can you calm down for a second?”

“No! For your information Rafe. She doesn’t want you! She’s moved on! And we could have too but no. You’re here still pining over something that doesn’t exist. You are so incredibly disrespectful to me. I have been nothing but supportive of you. And I have put up with so much shit from you so much hatred because what? Did I take you away from her? You chose me! You left her. And now I’m leaving you.” 

“Sofia-“

“The way you have treated me the last couple of months with your album release and hinting that it’s about her? Do you have any idea how that makes me look? How it makes me feel? You don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

“That’s not true.”

“Oh! Sorry! You and her! And barely even yourself, you know how I know?” She looks at him, volcanic ash in her eyes. “Because you’re fucking high right now!”

“Keep your voice down.” He pulls her deeper into the corner they’re standing in.

“Fuck you, Rafe. I loved you. I did. I thought that once she moved on, we would be okay. I was wrong. Do not sabotage this for her. She’s happy. You’re not good enough for her. And not for me.”

She does a 180 and storms off away from backstage and away from him. He looks up and Topper is staring at him from where he stands beside Sarah, her hand is on his arm, a look of concern on her face. He shakes his head at them and turns to the stairs that lead to the stage. He spots Y/N and Julio, they’re talking quietly to each other, he sees her laugh and touch Julio’s face, and he kisses the palm of her hand.

Fuck this. He runs back to the green room. He knows he left it around here somewhere and he knows where the lighters are. He digs through three of Barry’s jackets before he finds the blunt. Barry must have moved it. When he pulls it out, a plastic baggie with four white pills comes up with it. He thinks about putting them back. He wants to put them back. He hears the 5-minute warning, stuffs the baggie in his jeans and runs to find a lighter. 

+++

There’s something off about Rafe. She notices when they begin their second song. He’s swaying more than usual, coming up and singing to her face a little too closely. 

It must be because they’re trying to be friends. And maybe the fight with Sofia. It was pretty nasty the way she went at him. She couldn’t make out what they were saying, the crowd and music drowning them out. Sofia looked upset. She must have cooled off because she’s in the audience standing next to Sarah. Not that their manager would allow her to leave even if she wanted to. It would cause too much speculation online and that’s something they don’t need more of. 

She hasn’t had to protect Julio from how Rafe and her used to act on stage, during their no-talking years, they still put on an act but it was nowhere near the level of how they acted pre-everything. They were pretty heavy on the PDA, without confirming anything of course. It was more like singing into each other's mics while staring longingly into each other’s eyes. A lot of heavy petting, she would drape herself around Rafe, Rafe would swing her around and carry her. They would practically make out on stage every show. They did everything but have sex. It’s no wonder the theories and rumours started. 

Post everything that went down, they tamed it and kept it to their side of the stage unless they were switching over. They didn’t share a mic and looking at each other too long was off-limits. And now, well now, it looks like Rafe wants to sing into her mouth with the way he gets closer and closer. Julio knows about their past and he knows that she would never do anything to hurt him but this is a little much. She doesn’t want to rub anything in his face or make him feel disrespected. She also can’t diss Rafe on stage. They have an act. They’re all best friends and nothing bad has ever happened between them. 

So she plays along. And she sings into his mic, she whips her hair in his face and he sings over her shoulder. They’re closer than they’ve ever been. This should be a fun one to look at online. At some point, her shirt comes off. She’s a little angry at Rafe’s immediate switch-up. She feels that since they’re just figuring out how to be friends, he could give it a rest and not go all out. So her shirt comes off. It got stuck on the mic stand, she got pissed off that it ripped a little and she took it off, throwing it into the crowd. At some point Rafe is not even fully on the stage anymore, he’s lying down looking up at her as he plays his guitar. She’s standing over him, singing into the mic and playing the bass all while wondering what the hell has gotten into him. 

Security is going insane over Rafe hanging off the stage and people are trying to grab his legs. Sarah is diving into the crowd trying to get a shot of what’s happening on stage. She kind of wants the show to be over but at the same time, it’s the most fun she’s had on stage in a while. 

+++

Trying to find their footing after not being friends for three years, that much is clear. One moment he’s trying to make out with her onstage and the next he can barely look at her. It has been a little bit harder than she thought it would be. 

It’s strangely painful. The realization that they can’t go back to how they were before anything happened. She knew it wouldn’t be easy but these awkward silences might kill her. 

She’s sitting between Topper and Rafe, staring directly at Barry’s bored face as Ash explains who kows what. Something about which celebrities and important label heads are coming to tonight’s show. 

She didn’t care about the label heads. One of their most important shows had been the one two days ago. Their friends had all flown in from different places to see them. Now back in the city she calls home, that’s still all that matters. 

Cleo and Pope flew in from New York, John B and JJ had flown in from Hawaii. JJ would be leaving almost immediately after to continue training for the next big surf competition and John B would be staying at Sarah’s. Julio was at her house, she didn’t want him to have to spend the entire day at rehearsals so she told him to come by when he was ready. Ward was around somewhere too, probably with Sarah and John B. Kelce was at his hotel and would be arriving later with Kie after he got her from the airport, the only one that had missed the last show. It was an important show for them because of their people not because of some random celebrity they didn’t know. 

After the show, they would go to one of their favourite bars to celebrate and then she would be off to North Carolina for a week before moving to Madrid for the foreseeable future.

She was so excited to be there a bit before Julio started filming so they could visit his friends and family. 

After Ash is done running them through the guest list, they have some downtime before their private soundcheck and the fan soundcheck. Fan Soundcheck is her favourite because they get to play some deep cuts and answer some fun questions.

They’re standing backstage as one of their stagehands announces they’ll be out in three minutes. They’re standing in a circle making sure that their in-ears are on. Barry and Topper bickering about some random thing.

“Ready, buddy?” She looks at Rafe, her eyebrow raised as Barry laughs. 

“Buddy? Good one.” Topper laughs as Rafe’s face turns red. 

“Okay yeah, I’ll never say that again.”

“Please,” she laughs, “let’s go.” She leads the guys onto the stage as their fans start screaming. 

They play a song right off the bat and then sit down for a few questions. 

Everything is going fine, the mood is great, they’re all vibing with each other on stage, it’s great. Right up until it’s not. 

“Hi, my name is Sammy, my question is for Y/N.” She smiles at the girl and waves. 

“Hi Sammy, I remember you! You saw our last show too,” she speaks into the microphone. 

“Hi! Oh my goodness yes. I drove here from San Francisco after getting tickets last minute.” The girl rambles. “Okay, so I was wondering, what are you most looking forward to doing on your break?” She mulls over the question before answering. 

“I’m going to be semi-moving to Spain for a while so probably just exploring the city.” Sammy nods and thanks her as the mic is passed to the next person.  

Something shifts on stage after that question. She doesn’t know if she missed something or what, but suddenly the mood is tense. Barry’s in between her and Rafe and she can still feel the tension coming off him in waves. 

After the last question, they played one more song and bid the fans goodbye, telling them they would see them in a few hours for the show. 

Barry goes and does whatever Barry does before a show, Rafe storms off and Topper follows him. She looks over at her guitar tech who just shrugs his shoulders and takes her guitar from her. 

She texts Julio asking when he will be getting to the arena. When she doesn’t receive an answer, she sits in the green room, with no idea where the boys are. 

She dozes off for an hour before her phone blows up with texts from Rafe. She opens Julio’s message first, telling her that he would leave her house in an hour. Then she goes to Rafe’s texts, saying something along the lines of needing to talk to her. She sees that she has notifications from Twitter as well and opens those. From Rafe too. 

“I need you”

“Please don’t go”

“Y/N”

What is he doing? They just talked about trying to be friends, she knows about his feelings but he can’t go around blowing up her phone. He’s just sad about Sofia, how could he expect her to stay after he confessed to her that he still had feelings for his ex who wasn’t really his ex? 

She asks him what he’s doing and he asks to meet her. She tells him no, and that it’s too late to d this. Too late in the day, too late because the show is about to start, and too late because she’s going and she doesn’t want him. 

After telling Cleo to haul ass to the arena. Needing to speak to her about the Rafe of it all. She runs to the bus to hide. She doesn’t want to see him so she’ll avoid the arena. 

She doesn’t think about how if he doesn’t find her inside, he’ll look for her on the bus. 

“Y/N?” She hears him call. She’s in her bunk, curtain drawn and holding her breath. He walks closer and stands in front of her bunk. She can see his shadow. 

“I know you’re in there.” She stays quiet still. “Please talk to me.” She sighs, not able to deny him when he sounds so sad. 

She draws the curtain open and meets his eyes. 

“We talked about this.”

“No, we talked about how I would try to be your friend. Not how you’re going to move away with your boyfriend.”

“What did you expect me to do? Sit at home alone for however long the break ends up being?”

“No, I thought we could hang out when we were both home and repair our friendship or whatever.”

“Rafe, I can’t do that. I won’t put my life on hold for you anymore.”

“Why are you doing this? Why can’t you just feel the same way? Why won’t you love me?” 

She’s surprised by his words. For the first time, she looks at him. Takes in his dishevelled appearance, his jittering hands, and the dilation of his pupils. 

“Are you high?” she swings herself off her bed to get as much distance between them as possible. 

“No.” He’s lying. 

“What the fuck Rafe? Why would you do this to yourself?”

“Because I’m fucking sad okay? And I don’t want to feel anything.” She can’t believe he would go down this road again,  after being clean for so long. She can’t believe he would be around her like this. Not when he knows how many bad memories it brings.

“You have to leave. You have to get away from me.”

“Y/N.” His voice cracks.

“No. You know my history, the shit I have been through because of drugs. You know it very well actually. I don’t need to be around your erratic behaviour. It’s triggering, it hurts me.” Her voice is firm. 

“Okay. I’m sorry.” he backs up turning around quickly and storming off the bus. 

She sits back down, her hands slightly shaking. If he’s using again, she doesn't know if she can have him in her life. 

+++

He’s happy Sarah’s the one that finds him. He’s spread out on the floor. The curtain covers him from the fans' curious eyes. The stage is quiet, with only a few people coming and going. The rest of the crew’s at dinner. 

“What are you doing?” She stares from above him.

“Laying.” He mumbles

“Are you not going to come eat dinner?” She points behind her in the direction of the lunch room.

“Not hungry.”

“What’s wrong?

“Sad.” He sees the annoyance at his one-word answers cross her face. 

“Rafe, full sentences please.”

“Y/N told me to go away. That she couldn’t be around me.” She crouches down next to him. 

“I thought you two were trying to be friends?” she questions. 

“I ruined it.” He can feel himself well up. 

“How?”

“By being high.”

“You are not.” she kneels left to him now, grabbing his face roughly and bringing it so his eyes are aligned with hers. 

“I am.” She looks angry at him. He feels tears start to gather. God, why does he make the women he cares most about in his life so upset?

“You can’t be high. You’re an addict.”

“Just weed. Nothing more.”

“I don’t care if it’s just weed. It’s not just weed for you. It’s a slippery slope. You go from weed to forgetting you’re sober, to cocaine.”

“I’m sorry.” The pity in her look makes his stomach twist.

“Let’s go get you cleaned up before the show. You need food and to sober up.”

“I’ll be sad though.” She stands up, extending her hand out for him to take. 

“You’re high and sad, I don’t think it helped.”

“That’s what the cocaine is for.” He jokes, it doesn’t earn him a laugh, just a scowl.

“Don’t even joke about that.”

Maybe he can get drunk after the show, then he’ll forget how sad he is. 

+++

The show goes off without a hitch. They are all smiles, dripping with sweat as they take the final bow of the tour. Tears are prickling her eyes as she looks over at Topper. His smile was big and shining. She looks at Rafe and he’s messing with Barry’s hair, a burst of laughter leaving him as Barry jumps on his back. Barry waves to the crowd as Rafe piggybacks him off. Topper grabs her hand and pulls her off the stage, waving one last time before they can’t be seen anymore. 

Julio waits for her, a huge grin on his face and his arms wide open for her to run into. Once she lets go of him, she hugs Cleo and then Pope, and then she’s tackled by JJ, Kie, and John B. 

“You all killed it!” JJ yells in her ear, making her jolt back. 

“Fucking best show we’ve ever played!” Topper screams, coming up to her and hugging her. Barry joins the hug putting his sweaty arms around them both. Rafe hesitantly joins the group hug. 

“Another successful tour,” he says, his eyes catching hers in the huddle. She smiles softly. 

“Let’s go party!” Kie screams from down the hallway where she’s started to walk away. 

Everyone starts cheering and following her lead. She finds Julio’s hand as they make their way to gather their stuff and leave the arena. 

+++

He spots Julio come in through the back doors of the club, Y/N hanging off his arm, her lips swollen. His eyes soften when he looks at her. He sees how much he loves her, and how he would never hurt her. He would go to the ends of the world for her. And he hates him. He can’t stand that she’s not hanging off his arm. That he’s not the one kissing her against a brick wall outside a sleazy bar. 

Sofia’s gone. They’re done. And he’s hurting for the relationship that he could have had if he had let go of Y/N. Not that he ever could have. It wasn’t in the cards for him. A world where he wasn’t irrevocably in love with her didn’t exist. 

“You okay?” Sarah comes up next to him, planting her hands on the table to steady herself. 

“I’m high again.” He confesses. 

“Rafe, we talked about this.”

“I get that I just can’t stop. Everything hurts.” They look of pity from earlier returns.

“You need to stop.” He looks past her to where Y/N is.

“It’s just weed.”

“You don’t get to do weed. It’s not just weed to you. Slippery slope remember?

“I know.” 

“I’m here for you. I think you need to go back to rehab. Either before you tour or after. It needs to be sooner rather than later.  I’ll drive you there myself.” She offers. 

The idea of going back to rehab irks him. He’s not as bad as he was last time. He has control over it. At least that’s what he tells himself. 

“I don’t know how to be okay watching her be with someone else.” Sarah looks behind her at Y/N with Julio. Her smile lit up the room. Her laugh was music to his ears. 

“You don’t get to break down about this. You made your choice. Let her be happy. you need to focus on staying sober, you heal, and you move on.” 

“How?” He can’t rip his eyes away from the couple. Wishing with everything in him that it was him with her.

“By being her friend, Rafe.” She pats him on the back. He watches as she follows Topper out the back door where Y/N and Julio had come through earlier. 

Everything he and Sarah talked about flies out the window when Julio of all people see him standing there with a little bag full of who knows what that Barry gave him. Barry’s drunk and high, that’s one of the only reasons he gave it to him. Barry would kill him any other time. 

He’s been toying around with the idea of just doing it. Taking all these pills and getting it over with. 

“You probably shouldn’t take those.” Rafe side glances at him but doesn’t speak.”

“If you’re doing that shit you shouldn’t be around her.” Rafe doesn’t like him and he likes him even less when he tells him if he can or can’t be around Y/N.

“Mind your business.” He barks out.

“This is my business, you know why? Because she’s my business. And she’s a recovering addict too, Rafe. Or did you forget?” He shrugs. 

“Look, I don’t care if you care about your sobriety. But we both know you care about her enough not to risk hers. So if you’re going to do that shit, don’t bring it around her. And stay away from her.” This is the angriest he has ever heard the dark-haired man. 

“Don’t fucking tell me what to do on my tour with my friends.”  Deep down he knows Julio’s right. Right now he doesn’t care what the man says. He wants to fight him. 

“Do whatever the hell you want with yourself, I’m asking you to please, stay away from Y/N if you’re going to do drugs.”

“So you’re isolating her now too.”

“What does that mean?” Julio looks at him, one eyebrow raised, lips tight.

“You’re going to take her away. You’re taking her away from her family and her friends, to live in a country where she knows nobody. What kind of boyfriend does that?” 

“I’m taking her away from you, right?” 

“Yeah, you are.” The words spill from him before he can even think of denying them. 

“She isn’t anyone’s to take away. She makes her own decisions and she chose to be with me.” Julio saying shit like that makes him feel like he thinks he’s the best option. The best man out there.

“Shut up. You’re not better than me just because you say that stuff.”

“I’m not better than anyone, just let her be.” He doesn’t say anything. Julio stands up.

“You had your chance. Let her go.” He stays quiet. Julio starts to walk away. 

“I can’t.” He sees as Julio’s steps stutter.

“I’m going to fight for her.” 

“There’s nothing left to fight for.” He walks away. Back into her arms. Where he wishes he could be.

+++

The two weeks back home in Kildare were filled with press and interviews. Filled with people asking them when the next album was and when they would be back. He was scheduled to go to rehab after two weeks back home but due to scheduling, they had to move his tour up. Y/N was already in Spain. She spent a bit of time with her family, made sure everything was good and then flew off to Europe, taking his heart with her.

They were okay again, he had explained that he would go to rehab and try to get himself under control again. She told him that she was proud of him and that she wished him all the best. She told him that she wouldn’t be able to make it to his first show but that she would be there for his last. She hugged him goodbye on her last day on the island and told him that he would see her soon. 

The engagement scare still circulated in his brain. He’s so afraid that she would get engaged while she was away and he would truly lose her forever. Whenever he thought about it he felt like throwing up. 

One month. One month and he would see her again. 

+++

She stayed with Julio’s family for three weeks in Madrid before they had to go to Valencia where he had to film. She liked being in Madrid the most because she knew how to get around and she could stay at Julio’s house. In Valencia, they’re staying in a hotel so she doesn’t have the comfort of her things. She’ll go to the set with him most of the time but other times they are such long shoots she’d rather do anything else. She wants to explore but she’s so directionally challenged she’s scared to get lost and never return, her map couldn’t even save her sometimes. 

Julio cooks for her every day, he teaches her how to cook some dishes he learned in his classes, they write songs together, and she runs songs by him which turns into them taking turns serenading each other. They drunkenly kiss under street lights and dance in the rain. She’s never felt happier, ever been so in love. 

A month in and she’s back in Los Angeles where Rafe’s playing his last show. She’s excited to be here for him but she’s counting down the hours until she can go back to Spain. 

When she gets home she checks to see that her house hasn’t been broken into and that all pipes are still in place. Her worst nightmare is returning to a flooded house. It all seems normal, she opens a few windows to air it out. Penny’s back in Spain with Julio so she feels extra alone. 

She texts Rafe that she’s back in town and he texts her back within a minute. 

“Thank you for coming, angel.” She smiles at the nickname and responds,

“Wouldn’t miss it.”

He sees her and his world stops. Her hair is in loose waves and it looks a little longer than when he had last seen her. His heart reaches out to her, begging to be in her presence. Sarah notices him there standing like an idiot and waves him over, the motion grabbing Y/N’s attention. 

“Hey,” he says walking over.

“Hi!” She says putting her arms out to him, she goes on her tippy toes to reach him. 

“How are you?” He asks her, slowly letting go. 

“I’m good! Jetlagg is kicking my ass, but happy to be here! Look at you, rockstar.” She has a wide smile on her face that makes him feel like he’s seeing the sun for the first time.

“Yeah,” he laughs a little, scratching the back of his neck, shy all of a sudden.

“I heard a little rumour that Sofia was around?”

“I invited her to a show, extending a branch and all and we talked but that ship has sailed.”

“Are you on good terms?”

“I think we could be better, but it’s okay, I’m not holding my breath.” She links her arm with his, he looks at where their arms connect and feels like he’s on fire. How is he ever going to get over her?

+++

Rafe is amazing. He’s in a class of his own when he’s up on stage giving the show of a lifetime. It makes her tear up. She can’t help but think how he almost gave this all up when they were younger. She can’t imagine him anywhere but the stage. If he were working for his dad, his star would be caged. She’s so happy she could be a small part of his journey. He deserves the world. 

For the first time since they started talking again, she feels like they can go back to normal. She loves him. She can have her best friend back. 

+++

She doesn’t know how fast everything can fall apart. It’s perfect. Too perfect. She should have known that the other shoe would drop sooner or later. That’s how her life goes. She should have known she couldn’t have everything she wants. Things get ripped away eventually.

Rafe and Topper had mentioned that there were rumours they might have to go on a festival run. She hasn’t heard anything from their manager or their label. She likes the idea of a festival run, it could get them playing in front of people who don’t know who they are and expose them to new crowds.

She misses performing, she knows this would cut her time in Spain short. Much shorter than anticipated. She’s supposed to be there for almost seven months, with a bit of travelling back and forth until Julio finishes filming and they can stay in New York for a while. 

She’s only been here for three months. It’s been so nice to be back with Julio full time, and get to do normal couple things after work. She doesn’t know how she’ll break the news to him. She chooses not to until she knows for sure. 

The peace is short-lived. 

“What is this?” Julio holds up the phone for her to take. She grabs his phone and looks at Boston Calling’s festival lineup. She reads trying to see what he’s talking about and finally finds what he’s asking about. Saturday, May 8th: Kildare Split B stage. 

“I promise I didn’t know anything about this.” She tries to reassure him.

“That’s in two weeks.” He says to her, she feels the emotion in his voice.

“I know. I’ll talk to them.” She gives him his phone back and wraps her arms around him. 

“I’m sorry.” They stay wrapped up in each other, silence overtaking them.

+++

“Ash, no one told me. I just thought I had more time.”

“There’s nothing we can do, we have the contract, you’re expected here.” She slides her hand over her face and sighs. 

“Okay. That’s fine, but I’m leaving right after, no press.”

“Y/N, that’s not the only festival. You’ll be doing stops all spring and summer.” Her stomach drops. 

“Why didn’t anyone tell me?” 

“I’m sorry. The label will make no exceptions. You have to be here for every show.”

+++

She cries in Julio’s arms about having to leave so soon. He tells her it’s okay and that it’s nothing that they aren’t used to. She hates being used to being so far from him. She already misses him. 

They try to get back to normal for the remainder of the time but something shifts. She can’t quite place it. She doesn’t know if it’s her or if it’s him. It feels off. For the first time since they met, it feels like they’re orbiting around different stars. 

They’re returning to their apartment from lunch with one of his co-stars when her world starts to crack. She knows what he’s thinking before he even says it out loud. His eyes are sad and she can read him. She’s never hated him a day since they met. Not until now. She tries to distract herself, tries changing the subject, she tells him she’s going to shower and get ready for bed. 

In the shower, she tries to scrub away the doubt and rubs at her skin to try and rid herself of the feeling. Impending doom. The world ending. A black hole fiding her universe and destroying it before she can do anything to stop it. 

When she gets out of the shower he’s sitting on the edge of their bed facing her, she’s still trying to avoid it, she kisses his cheek and turns away. He stops her from walking away by grabbing her hand and pulling her towards him. She doesn’t face him. She can’t.

“This is so hard.” His voice comes out hoarse.

“Then don’t do it.” 

“I love you so much it hurts.” It’s not supposed to hurt. He taught her that. 

“I don’t know how much longer I can do this.”

“You said we could get through it. You said that it was nothing we hadn’t done.”

“I know what I said. I thought I could.”

“And now you can’t.” He looks at her, shaking his head.

“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry. I wish things could be different.”

“No. No. No. Stop, no, you don’t get to break up with me.” She’s screaming, the tears already spilling from her eyes. She’s never felt so crazy. And her world falls apart. She doesn’t remember a time before her life was him and her.

“Y/N. You know I love you, I would do anything for you, and this is the right thing to do.”

“No. You don’t get to choose what is right for me. I do. And I choose you. I always choose you.”

“It’s not feasible. Being away from you. It hurts too much. It hurts you and it hurts me. I can’t do 

it. My heart breaks every time you leave.”

“I’ll do anything.” Tears fall from his eyes as he gulps.

“Moving here is not realistic for you, you were supposed to be here for way longer and look, you leave in three days. I don’t blame you. It’s everything you’ve worked for and I won’t be the person that holds you back.” She’s sobbing now, she can’t see him over her tears, she’s shaking and desperate to get him to listen. To keep him. 

“I’ll quit the band.” It comes tumbling out of her mouth before she can stop it. she grabs his face and makes him look at her. “I’ll quit.” He looks at her eyes wide. 

“No.”

“Julio, please.”

“You don’t mean that, you’ll resent me and you won’t be happy and it’ll ruin us.”

“I won’t. I promise.” She’d never heard these sounds come out of her body before, so guttural and painful from somewhere deep inside her. 

“You will. You would never ask me to quit acting, would you?”

“No,” she whines, the tears flowing.

“Then how could I ask you to quit your dreams?” He’s right. She knows he is and it fucking hurts. She wants to rip her heart out. She’s never felt pain like this and she wishes she could have never met him. 

That’s not true, the thought of never having him in her life hurts. No matter how painful this moment is, the realization that their relationship is over is, she would never take back the years she spent with him. He showed her what it meant to be loved. How it felt to be seen and wanted. He taught her selflessness in love. She would never take it back. She needs to numb the pain. 

She falls into his arms, her face on his chest as she cries and cries. He holds her like he never wants to let go and cries with her. God how she wishes she could live another life. How she wishes they could be other people. In another life, she thinks. In another life. 

He’s what she wants, but she’s not what he needs. Because she’s hurting him. She’s been hurting him and he can’t put up with it anymore. She’s not worth it.

She books her flight for that night. Not wanting to prolong their inevitable goodbye. She watches as he closes the door to his apartment. The last time she’ll be here. They hold hands on the way down to his car and then as he drives her to the airport where he kisses her for the last time. Kisses her goodbye. And she gets on the plane and cries all the way home. The flight attendant keeps bringing her water and the people around her are whispering. She closes the curtains around her pod. Her eyes focus on the sides of the window as the frost builds like little spider webs reaching out to her.

She loves him. She loves him. She can’t believe this.

+++

She gets to her house. Penny next to her. She sets her stuff down next to the door and collapses into a pile of skin, bone, and numbness. Her heart missing. Her heart was somewhere back in Spain with the boy he dragged her out of her isolation and brought her back to life. How could she ever be okay again?

She doesn’t leave her house or her bed until the day she has to be on a flight to Boston. She has about 100 missed calls and a billion unopened text messages. She doesn’t care to talk to anyone. Doesn’t want to explain the breakup. 

+++

She can feel herself isolating. To the way, things were before him. She’s in a room full of people and she feels the most alone she’s ever been. She waves everyone off, not giving them a second glance. She marches on stage, she plays the show with a missing heart. Pretending she’s okay. The band sees right through her, the fans don’t know better. 

Everyone is worried about her. Ash forces her to come out with the band and crew. She’s probably scared she’ll overdose if she’s on her own. All the telltale signs of how she used to be. They’re keeping an eye on her. 

She doesn’t feel like she’s in her body, she’s floating through life right now. She walks out onto the balcony, needing fresh air. 

Everyone’s dancing as she sits on the balcony and stares at the night sky. The wind makes goose bumps rise on her skin. She feels another tear try and escape her eye. She blinks it away before it can. She’s so tired of crying all the time. 

“Hey, you.” Topper steps out into the crisp air. 

“Hey,” she whispers, trying to cover that she’s been crying. 

“You okay?”

“No.”

“It’ll be okay. Sometimes love just doesn’t last. It happens and it’ll pass.”

“We didn’t break up because we didn’t love each other. If the distance didn’t exist I would still be with him. I would choose him over and over again but I was hurting him and in turn, I was hurting myself and neither of us expected or would accept the other quitting their dream jobs to move. So we’re done and it fucking hurts, Top. I saw forever with him. I haven’t felt that way about anyone ever. Part of me thinks that one day, when we’re both settled and not chasing the next best thing, we’ll be together.” She’s choking up, tears spilling over.

“Come here,” he opens his arms to her and she falls into them, “I’m here for you.” she looks over his shoulder to where Rafe is with their friends. 

“For now I just want to drink and cry and sleep for three weeks. I want the pain to stop. I don’t want to feel.” She pulls back from Topper, grabbing his arm and dragging him back inside. 

She would forget. At least for tonight.

+++

Her head pounds in the morning. She would blame all the crying she’s been doing but it’s mostly the alcohol. Cleo would kill her if she knew how much she was drinking again. She opens her eyes and looks around the half-lit room, the morning sun peeking through the curtains. The curtains are on the wrong side of the room. She looks around some more and notices clothes thrown on the floor. Men’s clothes. This isn’t her room. 

She remembers bits of the night before, kissing and touching in the elevator ride, the fight to find his room key, looking into his blue eyes and forgetting the name of the man with the brown eyes. At least for a moment. She blinks as if that would stop the headache.  

“Shit.” She hears from beside her. She slowly turns her head until her eyes meet the blue eyes staring back at her. 

“Top.”

“Fuck.”

[lostsyren]

᭝ ᨳଓ ՟ Find me on TikTok: @syr3nedits

(thanks @sincere1ystar for the idea!!)

[loveflxwers]

rafe + sofia <3

[drewsephrry]

this is one of the best rafe-sofia edits ive seen

link

[rafesangelita]

why tf are ppl mad that we like rafe and sofia💀 when will we be able to like a character without people saying why they don’t like them like idgaf😭😭

womp womp we like rafia over here cry about it?

also can i send some edits of them i’ve seen so many that i love🤭

i have no idea :( it’s all fiction at the end of the day, what’s wrong with liking a pairing?? i love them and i would LOVE to see ALL of the edits you have!!! i haven’t opened up tiktok today so i’m starving for them..

[nco05]

Family is the most important thing

To Rafe. It has always been. Even with his skewed priorities. Even though he hurt Sarah, endangered Wheezie by accident & helped cause Ward's death (he was already wounded on Rafe's hitman's orders & weakened)

Sarah, Wheezie, Ward... & now Sofia

He loves his sisters, he loves his dad & he definetly also loves his "not" (lol you lying Kook ass mofo tf you mean not?) girlfriend

But one person he never loved? Rose. Which is... interesting

(The edited pics of lil Drew & Lil Madelyn are adorable as hell)

[whytheylosttheirminds]

if riara truly will be happening i will cry. it would be so fucking unfair to jj and sofia too. like why bringing her into the show then. im scared

What’s so interesting to me about Riara is that every time it’s brought up in interviews or articles they always say “the fans seem to want it” or “the fans ship Rafe and Kiara will you guys do it?” and that always confuses me because from where I’m sitting it feels like most true fans don’t. When they say “the internet wants this” I think it’s usually a very surface level search on twitter or just reading TikTok comments on an edit of them kidnapped by Singh. The thing that would make me maddest is if they just do it for sake of fan service when it doesn’t seem they actually know anything about their own fans.

I could go on a whole other rant about the misogyny of the way they’ve written Kie for 5 years and how fucked up it’d be to move her onto the next relationship while she grieves but that’s a whole other story…

I’m just gonna keep believing in Rofia and living in denial lol

[obxone]

All In My Head (Part One)

Edited-ish. ~1.3k words.

“Rafe?” You call as you enter Tanneyhill, the front door being left unlocked, and the law littered with empty cans, bottles, and cups already confirms your suspicions. Rafe had a party last night to celebrate his newfound power as head of the Cameron estate. “Rafe? You here?!” You call louder as you wander through the main floor and enter the kitchen. You pause as your eyes land on a dark-haired girl in one of his t-shirts sitting at the breakfast bar. “Oh.”

“Hi!” She smiles before taking a bite of her yogurt. “Are you looking for Rafe?”

“Yes.”

She puts her spoon down before clasping her hands together on top of the counter. “He stepped out. Said he had some business to take care of.”

“Ah,” you muse, glancing around. The inside seemed untouched by the party. “Okay, well thanks.”

You turn to go, your mind putting the puzzle pieces together without him.

“Umm…” she stands quickly, and you turn back to look at her. “Rafe said he’ll be back in a bit. Do you want to leave a message?”

“Sure.” You nod and cross to grab the notepad that you know is in one of the kitchen drawers. You scribble down the note and fold it before passing it to her. “Thank you, that is very kind of you.”

“Sure!” She smiles, tucking it with her yogurt. “I’m Sofia.”

“Y/n.” You offer before leaving. You exhale, the sting of your new reality setting in for you as you close the front door. You look up to the sound of a bike pulling up the drive, and it is none other than Rafe.

The urge to stay and fight it out is there, but with his new arm candy present, it would be pointless, and you know it as you cross the lawn to your car.

“Hey!” His voice carries across the lawn, and you glance over to see him getting off his bike. His helmet is removed as those beautiful blue eyes track you across the lawn. “Hey! Y/n!”

“I have to go!” You call back as you unlock your car and get in. He is racing across the lawn to you. His long legs close the distance in a heartbeat, and his hand closes around the door before you can close it. “Let go, Rafe.”

“What are you doing here?” He asks, those blue eyes searching over your face for any indication of whether you know who is inside that house.

You school your features and shrug. “Came to check in, but no one answered.” You gesture to the closed glass door. The lie comes surprisingly smoothly from you. “I have to get to work, Rafe.”

He tips his head, but you keep your expression neutral.

“Umm… will you come back?”

“Sure,” you smile weakly. You would not, but Rafe did not need to know that. “I can come by once I get off.”

“Cool,” he smiles, sticking his hands in his pockets after he lets your door go. “We can talk about this. I miss you.”

“Sure, Rafe.”

“Okay,” he says and his smile brightens. “See you soon, Baby.”

“See you,” you whisper as you shut your car door and leave the driveway. The tears do not come until you are turning onto the main road through town. The sting of his betrayal magnifies with each sniffle as you wipe at your cheeks.

Without intending to, you pull up to the Chateau. You put the car in park and press your forehead to the steering wheel as you try to get your emotions under control. Rafe had cheated on you, and you would never be able to forgive him. You could not, not after everything you had watched your mom go through with her roster of ex-boyfriends.

A light tap of knuckles on your window has you lifting your head to see JJ staring at you. You frown and try to wipe at your cheeks again. A scowl etches across his face before he pulls the handle of your door and opens it before reaching for you.

“What happened, pretty girl?” He whispers, letting you sink into his arms as you cry. “What happened, huh?”

“Rafe… cheated,” you sniffle before glancing at the house. “Is anyone here?”

“Just us, come on,” he murmurs and guides you towards the house. You follow him inside and curl up in the depths of the dusty old couch while he busies getting you something to drink. He returns and passes you a glass of water. “Drink up.”

“Thanks, Jay,” you mumble before sipping some of the water. You exhale, dropping your head onto the arm of the couch. “It is that bartender, the one that works for the kooks. The pretty short-haired brunette.”

“Damn.”

“Yep.”

JJ paces, hands on his hips as he watches you. “Did you go see your mom?”

“Can’t find her,” you mumble, wiping at your cheeks again. “She likely has a new beau and is off with him somewhere.”

“Damn,” JJ mutters with a shake of his head.

“I know. I’m all alone.”

“No, you’re not.” He says, his tone carrying an edge to it. “You’ve got me and you’ve got the rest of the pogues.”

You sniffle, attempting a faint smile for him. “Two lost souls barely hanging on, huh?”

He smiles weakly. “That’s us, pretty girl.” He looks around quickly before grabbing a blanket for you. “Will you stay here? You can stay here and wait for the others, okay?”

You nod, chewing on your bottom lip for a second. “If you need to go, please go. I can stay here and wait for the others.”

“Okay,” he nods, scrubbing his hand through his blond locks. “I’ll be back, okay? I just promised John B I would help with something.”

“I’m good. We’ve got to save Uncle John, right?” You reassure him, and he goes out the door. The screen door slams, and you hear his dirt bike until it fades out as he leaves you behind.

Crying yourself to sleep had not been the plan, but you wake to Rafe kneeling in front of you. His worried expression makes your heart squeeze as he gently strokes his thumb over your tear-stained cheek.

“Hey, Baby.”

“Rafe?” You mumble and sit up, looking around in a panic. “What are you-?”

“I got your note,” he murmurs, his fingers moving down your neck. “'Thank you -y/n.’ That’s all I get?”

“I panicked.”

He looks away before clearing his throat. “Sofia is…”

“It’s okay, Rafe,” you shrug and look around. “I get it. We weren’t sure where we stood. I was silly to even think we could come back after everything that has happened.”

“No, no… don’t say that.”

Tears threaten again and you look down at your hands as you fidget with the frayed edge of the couch. “It’s true. We aren’t the crazy young lovebirds that felt like they could take on the world anymore. Those two people are long gone.”

“Baby,” he murmurs, moving closer. His hands wrap around yours and bring them to his lips, where he presses kisses across your knuckles. “No… I made a mistake, okay? I made a stupid mistake.”

You give him a sad smile as you pull your hands free. “I forgive your mistake, but I can’t do this anymore. You have to let me go.”

He looks away, and you can see the tears welling in his own eyes now.

“I love you, Rafe, but I can’t be with you anymore. It’s time, Baby. You have to let me go.”

He clears his throat and stands. His hand swipes over his face, wiping away the tears that threaten to well over. “Please don’t do this. I can’t lose you.”

“You already have.”

“No! Please, I can’t… I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“I’ve already forgiven you,” you murmur, looking down at the frayed threads of the couch again. “You should go, the pogues will be here soon.”

He seems to snap out of whatever thought trail he is on at the mention of your friends. His shoulders straighten as he stares at you. “Okay.”

“Okay.”

He turns and goes without another protest, and the screen door slamming shut makes you flinch as silent tears flood your vision.

(Part Two)