#rabbit yappin

[clunkwork-rabbit]

Hello world, and all who inhabit it. This is Spiffy Bobunny. I know there are a few RP blogs dedicated to acting as me, but this one is just me.

My Twit isn't going anywhere, but the amount of attention its received has made it difficult to use it as a "social" platform. Professionalism aside, a certain do-gooder under my urged me to get a more casual account on this site so I don't lose myself to my work.

I hope to get to know my friends, fans, and enemies on a deeper and casual level!

[alias-main]

First meeting:

Felix was just minding his own business when this random kid goes up to him asking him questions and being a kid

Felix being Felix, is more than happy to entertain the little guy even letting him borrow his hat

But just before he could ask where his parent was

Oswald swoops in and starts yelling angrily at him

Felix in the middle of this huge misunderstanding, is having a gay crisis

The crisis being that he didn’t know he was gay until now

Felix does his best to explain and Oswald only believes him after his kid says that’s what happened

He leaves and Felix is reeling from 1. Being gay (or bi) 2. His new crush is an asshole

Oswald is still grieving Ortensia, but with 420 kids he really doesn’t have time to process that

Which 1. Explains his overprotectiveness and 2. His assholeness

Bro has kids to look after, a show to help out in, and ignoring his wife’s death

Felix on the other hand is reeling and subconsciously stopping himself from pursuing anything by beating himself up with reality

Because he for one doesn’t know how to raise kids and he doesn’t know anything about romance. His crush was born and dead on the same day.

As far as first meetings, this was shit lol

But then, Felix picks up two stray kids (bendy and Boris) and essentially becomes their adopted dad

Oswald takes time off from the shows and leans on Mickey/donald/goofy more

Allowing him time to actually think about ortensia and her death

(Oswald also reveals to Mickey how bad he feels for going off on Felix, he also starts picking up on his books after this)

After a certain point when the party returns, Felix and Oswald do meet again

Felix adores his kids but his crush comes back full force after Oswald apologizes and tries to play it off cool

(He’s a dad and a dork but somehow this is even more endearing??)

So they start to becomes friends at this point, even exchanging a few letters after their party leaves

Third meeting, Felix is p much integrated with all the kids

Oswald sees ortensia for a quick moment as Felix is playing with them

He tells him to get out

Later, Oswald confesses to Mickey that he’s scared Felix might be similar to ortensia and he wouldn’t be able to handle that

Mickey tells him to stop being a dick in a nice way

Felix doesn’t deserve that and also ortensia is nothing like Felix aside from being cats so oswald needs his eyes checked (joke)

Felix talks to Sheeba about what happened and sheeba is like stop being a doormat

But Felix is like, bro looked devastated I couldn’t stay in good conscious after that

After this oswald actually initiates more and more contact with Felix

Mentally making a list of comparisons between him and ortensia

At the end of it, he realizes how little in common they actually are

Ortensia seemed sweet and kind but was a spitfire with cuss words that would make even a sailor cry

Felix, despite all his grandeur adventures and excitement, is soft spoken and a bit ditzy. He avoids cussing as his fans are usually kids and he doesn’t want to influence them like that.

But Oswald also realizes something.

He’s not scared of Felix being like ortensia anymore.

He’s scared because he thinks he might be falling for Felix regardless.

At this point Felix has to leave again anyways, leaving Oswald to his thoughts on this.

He decides, without advice or talking to anyone, that he wouldn’t do that to ortensia and he wouldn’t throw away his friendship with Felix over this

Felix in the meanwhile is like, man having a crush is awesome! Even better is that he’s my friend so it’s like a two in one deal! :3

[narzissenkreuz-ordo]

sill trying to think of a ship name for these idiots. im thinking rabbittea??? tearabbit?? teatimerabbit?????

oh wait i think i will go with teatime rabbit bc. its funny bc. wrio drinks tea. tea time. time. pocket watch/time motif. silvanus' white rabbit influence. ive connected the DOTS

[lemonlimestar]

i will draw superboy 94 issue 92 related content. this is me holding myself accountable.

[clunkwork-rabbit]

To answer the many, many, many asks. Yes, I have seen the "Bobunny Pepsi ad". No, I have no idea how it got made either. It is... So obviously me. I absolutely do own the rights to my likeness. But I'm pretty sure the legal fees alone would kill me dead.

[narzissenkreuz-ordo]

these two make me sick i hate them

[rottedghuleh]

I love otis so much I'm so sad that there isn't much about him </3

Otis x F!Reader

A/N: And I damn agree with you. I have scourged the Internet for good Otis content and there's been A FEW I've come across. So here's a juicy one for y'all mostly because I'm a big Otis lover.

Warnings: Otis himself is a warning, the UTI is worth it, breeding, choking, hair pulling, a lot of cussing, degrading.

"Imma give you to the count of three to drop the fuckin' attitude, mama. I ain't dealin' with no bitch that grew up with puppy dogs in Disney Land talkin' shit to me." Otis spat. He had too far enough of the constant bickering with you. The yappin' and the talkin' back. Over breakfast, in his room, when going out to feed the hogs.

Otis would give you the same treatment as he does his own victims.

You almost wanted to snap back, but the idiotic grin that came across your face when you realized what was about to go down. It was your absolute favorite. Otis would get so wound up when you got bratty and he'd chase you across the lawn like you were his victim. He'd chase you far into the woods until you were panting and whimpering like a scared puppy.

"Go on, I'll give you a head start." Otis pulled the ragged cowboy hat over his head, his hands coming down over his belt buckle. "Run, rabbit, run." Before anything else could be said, you took off like Otis said. It usually didn't take long to get to you. He was older, but them long ass legs is what really could get him going after you.

You ran hard, hard enough that the burning in your lungs was already starting to ache. That's how Otis liked it, when you were too tired to bitch back with him. The gun shot echoing in the air was your alarm that you needed to haul ass. The briars were causing small cuts on your legs as you whipped past them.

It was a horrible time to start running out, dark and mosquitoes swarming the area. The dark is when Otis like to hunt. No rabbit can't see or smell his scent. The cracks of sticks in the distance is all Otis needed to tell exactly where you were at. You thought you had made it, the blood thundering in your ears blocked out most noises besides the cicadas screaming into the late night.

"Got'cha, you bratty bitch!" Otis slammed in from your right side, sending you sprawling into the dirt. The air whipped out of your lungs like you were suddenly sucked out by a vacuum. It might've caused a slight moment of panic, but it was easily managed.

"Down, mama! Imma show you how a bitch should behave." Otis didn't waste time, pinning you underneath him where your face was in the dirt and your ass was pressed firmly against his groin. The warmth of his erection was warm enough to make you insides melt and quiver. He was always hard, the chase always had him going, especially if it wasn't some New York yuppie that was his victim.

A quick yank of your dress skirt and your ass was suddenly bare in front of Otis. What got to him more than getting to chase after his toy? You wearing no panties when you knew you were about to get a good fuck. "Atta, girl. Y'know how to fuckin' listen sometimes."

Otis grinned like a drunk bastard as he fumbled with his belt, the clatter of his buckle and his pants hitting the ground was almost loud to you once the pounding in your ears stopped. Otis grabbed a handful of your hair in a iron grip, ensuring your ass stayed bent in place.

"You're a good breedin' rabbit, bitch." Otis grunted, his cock teasing over the wet fold between your legs. "God damn, just a lil' slut, huh? You get so turned on when you know when your bratty ass is about to get ruined by me." Otis had his ways of making you feel praised and degraded at once. His words always filthy but some sort of praise was hidden underneath it. What causes even more praise was the groan of pleasure he released when he finally stopped teasing and just bottomed out in you, jolting your body further into the dirt.

"Fuck, you bastard-" You mewled, your thighs and hips already starting to ache the harder Otis drilled into you. You were sopping wet, the wet squelches of your insides parting around Otis was loud and filthy.

Otis was almost drooling onto your back before he caught himself. "You fuck." Otis placed a thick hand around your throat, forcing your head out of the dirt. "Arch it, arch it, two timing whore." He groaned out. You did. Your back arched, giving Otis access to just rail into you hard. Your air was choking off and your pussy fluttered the closer you got. He was hitting so deep into that gooey cervix that it made your eyes roll when your vision went spotty.

"No, ma'am. Not yet, mama." Otis pulled out, leaving you gasping for air as a scream almost ripped from your lungs. The missing ache of his cock was horrible. Otis laid back against the ground, forcing you right on top of him where his cock could pop right back in.

Otis could never stand long being out of you. When you'd get so needy and your cum was dribbling all over his pubes, it was just almost as delicious as Mama Firefly's peach cobbler.

Otis pushed his hat onto your head before giving you a firm slap across the face. "Ride." He commanded. It took you a moment to regain your thoughts and, of course, your breathing. The slap on your cheek stung but in the best way possible.

"You're a fucking jerk, Otis." You panted out when you started to rutt your hips into his cock. Otis leaned his head back with a groan that turned to laughter. "Oh, you dumb motherfuckn' slut. I'm a jerk? Thought you were used to them tourists when you served ice cream for tips. I got you a tip, a nice big fucking one." Otis held your hips, not out of being greedy, he knew you were getting exhausted.

What followed was probably the best fucking you had in your life. It left you gripping at his chest, pulling onto his hair. The sting of his hips slapping against you was fucking orgasmic. Otis pulled you roughly against his chest, his relentless pumping was growing uneven before the warm heat of his cum spilled into your womb. He pulled out, the rest of it covering your thighs and ass.

Otis smirked at the dirty work. He usually left people bloody, not shaking and covered in his cum. "Up ya' go, rabbit." Otis stood up, throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, leaving you a giggling mess. Your red ass and cum soaked hole was just the perfect sight to see.

"I may be a fuckin' jerk, mama, but I at least know how to treat a lady." Otis planted a kiss against the side of your ass as he carried you back to the house.

[peapod20001]

how do you draw ash,,, I'm struggling to draw him. pls break him down to his essence for me so I can better understand him

He’s got a very simple design compared to all my other ocs, so in theory he should be easy to draw…. But because his design is simple it is very easy to completely fuck up one thing and end up with him not looking right (speaking from experience lol)

So! Here’s my attempt at like. Breaking him down for you. I’m not actually sure if this will help any LMAO but I hope it does :,,) I’ll absolutely do more if you need it tho like anything specific like I had fun doing this

He’s a very round boy, as in like soft edges… really the only points on him would be like. His hair or whatever. He’s got a big mouth for yappin the ear off his family members, and big eyes for lookin at his family, and long arms to hug his family, etc etc.

You would NEVER see him mad like you would my other ocs, he’s the type to start crying when put into a situation that makes him really upset (you probably wouldn’t even see him very upset either as he has a tendency to run away from situations that make him feel bad)

He’s very aware of his body and the space he takes up, so unlike my other gangly ocs he isn’t clumsy at all. He DOES find himself in awkward situations sometimes (like accidentally eavesdropping on people cus they don’t notice he’s there and he’s too awkward to move away cus what if they think he’s listening in on purpose)

He’s not very outgoing with most people and it takes him a bit to really warm up to someone, but once you’re in his good books you are never getting him to chill out. He’s got a serious case of “lack of volume control” and he talks to people like they are across a big room pretty much all the time. If he isn’t yelling he’s probably whisper talking to try and seem less obvious, he gets self conscious about taking up too much space.

He’s a big talker he’s always trying to say something to someone if they’ll let him and often times it has no relation to the current topic or situation (only he seems to notice how the topics flow together) He can and will go on for hours if no one stops him. He’s got like, an internet sized brain in his noggin so he could quite literally go on forever about literally anything (he goes down research rabbit holes for fun)

I should probably stop rambling about him now LMAO sorry I just love him a bunch he’s a nerd

[toxifoxx]

ok serious thoughts on the fnaf movie this time. they're a little scattered but i did just see it so i gotta think on it some more before i give like an actually structured review. but immediate thoughts post-viewing:

i had fun with the movie! i thought it was enjoyable. was hoping for at LEAST a little more blood (i really wanted to see william fucking explode into blood for one) but i knew there wasn't gonna be much since its pg13. it wasn't scary like in the slightest except for 1 jumpscare that almost kind of got me but i wish they set up the atmosphere a little bit more.

MAJOR GRIPE. i hate that vanessa is related to william. please stop retconning the afton family scott pretty please. give that man his dead children back. i seriously seriously love the "man goes fucked up sicko mode because of his grief" trope but alas.

i think that the pacing is NOTTTT very good at all. william needed more screen time 100% and there wasn't that great of a build up to the climax. maybe its more impactful to people who didn't already know that steve is william, but i'd wager that they're probably like HUH WHUH??? at that reveal because its not really. set up that much. and yes im biased because i fucking love william ok.

i think matthew lillard did a great job, BUT... we barely got to see him at all! and, especially with the "i always come back line..." i cringed a little bit man. like what are you coming back from? you haven't died yet man. there's nothing to come back from yet tf are you yappin about. it felt like it was really shoved in there honestly. we DESPERATELY needed to see more of him! in fact, most of the characters needed more set up! like ok... mike lost his brother? why should i care. mike is gonna lose his sister? why should i care tho?? these kids died but they dont really seem like they care too much about being dead either so whats the big deal.

AND WHY DIDN'T THE KIDS HAVE BEEF WITH WILLIAM/THE YELLOW RABBIT. THEY CLEARLY WERE SHOWN TO KNOW HE KILLED THEM, BUT THEY DON'T TURN ON HIM UNTIL ABBY PUTS UP HER SHITTY LIL DRAWING? FOR REAL????? WHY? + THEY DONT EVEN GET NAMED AT ALL. THE MOVIE CARES SO LITTLE ABOUT THE KIDS AND YET THEY DONT EVEN ALLOCATE THAT TIME TO AFTON EITHER. THEY FUMBLED BOTH SIDES!

also a lot of stuff just kind of isn't resolved? like the mike vs his aunt thing. is his aunt dead or...? + what was the fucking freddy saw trap thing that doesn't get explained at all. did the police not see that or does william just lug that thing in and out of the building constantly. what's it even for.

im also curious about some things. whats up with that kid who had a midnight motorist shirt. whats up with the other random springlock animatronic that is never named nor do we get a full look at. Where's Henry. are we just straight up ditching henry this time around?

i came into this knowing it wouldn't be lore accurate nor gory because of the rating but ugh. Ughhhh. can we please settle on one fnaf timeline to be canon its been almost 10 years we don't needa be playing like this anymore bro. i want to see the afton family for REAL show me cc getting his fuckin head chomped off or elizabeth getting snatched. give us literally any of the original missing children give us cassidy or something. like even in the silver eyes at least we got henry ffs! it just makes me a little sad knowing that one of the rejected scripts WAS accurate to the game lore.

shout out to my homie @yellowbutterbear for seeing the movie with me and discussing this stuff with me 🔥

6/10 not enough william afton moaning and whimpering AMEN!!!

[clunkwork-rabbit]

rate all of the miraculous team holders by how much you think they could bench press, go

Assuming they have their Miraculous active,

9th place, Capricorn. Yeah yeah, I know. I'm gonna get hate for this one. But earnestly, he is our weakest member in terms of strength. Sorry Cappy.

8th place, Mariquita. She's agile, quick in body and mind, but not so strong. DEX build vs STR build.

7th place, Sphinx. An incredible utility who can absolutely smack down baddies in a fight, but falls short of kickassery.

6th place, Dugout. With a toned physique from running the bases and hitting dingers out the park, Dugout's the definition of a good middle ground.

5th place, Pipsqueak. Do not undersell this mouse if you value your ribcage. The rat attack is strong.

4th place, Fluttermouse. Speaking of mice, Fluttermouse is part bee part mouse and all kicking your shit in. Like with Pipsqueak, there can be multiple of him. Good luck with that.

3rd place, Tigerdrop. Droop stans, lay down your weapons. Your favorite tdick king is, in fact, rather beefy. When it comes to a 1-on-1 with a tough opponent, his mix of offense and defense is the best of both worlds.

2nd place, Bronco. Yeah I'll be honest, the most hate I'm going to get for this is why she's 2nd and not 1st. Which y'know, fair. She has done a LOT of strong stunts over the years. There's no question that when it comes to benching, she's just about the best. However.

1st place, me! Yeah yeah, I know. This sounds like peak Dunning-Kruger effect to the Bronco stans and fancammers. (btw y'all are nuts with editing software, some of this stuff is quality). But if my fancams of me when I'm not having to testify to the New York and US Congress have anything to say, it's that I am pretty unequivocally the strongest. My current limit is 200 short tons. (203,209kg/448,000lb/203tonnes) I haven't really wanted to post any of my workout since I like privacy and also I know how the internet works.

Honorable mention goes to Honeybee since she's not in our team but in the NYC. I'd probably put her between Dugout and Pipsqueak.

Thanks for the ask, stranger!

[arpmemething2]

Loony Tunes Sentence Starters

Send one for my muse’s reaction.  Feel free to change pronouns as needed.

“It’s supply and demand! They supply the ghost, and I demand the money!”

“And remember, 'mud' spelled backwards is 'dum'.”

"Go ahead! I’d love to see the audience boo you off the stage!”

“Consider yourself as lucky because you are getting another chance from me to draw a gun.”

“Go on! Shoot me again! I enjoy it! I love the smell of burnt feathers and gunpowder and cordite!”

“Jumpin' without a parachute? Kinda dangerous, ain't it?”

“Don’t think it hasn’t been a little slice of heaven…’cause it hasn’t!”

“I do so enjoy observing the flora and fauna of that tiny planet.”

“I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Albuquerque!”

“You know, sometimes me conscience bothers me… but not this time.”

“It just goes to show ya that a one-eyed jack rabbit can beat a king.”

“I didn’t say I would be nice. I said I would try. It was too hard.”

"He’s about as sharp as a bowling ball."

"What's up doc?"

“Oh dear, now I shall suppose I have to use force.”

“Help me, please. I’m too moist and tender to retire.”

“Okay Okay I'm shuttin' up. Why should I continue to keep yappin' when I'm told to shut up. I'm not the kind that don't know when to stop.”

“Ho! Ha-ha! Guard! Turn! Parry! Dodge! Spin! Ha! Thrust!”

“I wonder what the poor bunnies are doing this season?”

“Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out alive!”

"What a perfect time for me to go on a diet."

“When I say whoa, I mean whoa!”

“Brace yourself for immediate disintegration.”

“I don't want to be grown up anymore.”

"You wasted a wish! I wish that burrito was stuck on your big dumb nose!"

“Carrots are devine… You get a dozen for a dime, It’s maaaa-gic!”

“The way I run this thing you'd think I knew something about it.”

"Sssshh... Be vewwy quiet.  I'm hunting wabbit!"

"Champagne nights, tropical music and a heavy bank account!"

"Thufferin' thuccotash!"

“I’m in my own little word. But it’s okay, they know me here.”

"You rack'n frack'n varmint!"

“Oh, drat these computers. They’re so naughty and so complex. I could pinch them.”

"Well, it's 5 o'clock somewhere."

“Do you happen to know what the penalty is for shooting a fricaseeing rabbit without a fricaseeing rabbit license?”

“Wait! I haven’t tried toadying, kowtowing and butt-kissing yet! I’m still begging here!”

"Cats don't lay eggs. There's something screwy here."

"Of course you realize, this means war."

"His muscles are as soggy as a used teabag."

“I know this defies the law of gravity, but I never studied law!”

"Looks like the boy genius is tryin' to show me up."

"It was a terrible storm, the boat wocked and worked up one wave and down the other."

"You're despicable."

"If you're gonna be two-faced sweetie, then atleast make one of them pretty!"

"F-f-first they told me to lose the stutter now they tell me Im not funny anymore. "

“Well, what did you expect in an opera? A happy ending?”

"That's all folks!"

"I don’t know the meaning of the word fear!"

"Beep beep!"

"I don't ask questions, I just have fun."

"Hungry!"

“Just when I’m getting used to the voices in my head, one of them starts stuttering.”

"Say your prayers!"

“Me? Normal? How dare you insult me like that?”

"You know, it is possible to be too attractive."

"I am positive, I am mental and I know I have attitude.”

“I’m not like other people, I can’t stand pain, it hurts me.”

"I tawt I taw a puddy tat!"

“Well, what do you know … there’s the little Wiener Schnitzel now.”

“If you’re happy and you know it, you're probably annoying someone who isn’t.”

"This is gonna cause more confusion than a mouse in a burlesque show!"

"Who's responsible for this unwarranted attack on my person?"

“I'll be scared later. Right now I'm too mad.”

“If an interesting monster can’t have an interesting hairdo I don’t know what this world is coming to.”

“You say the Loch Ness Monster is living in your jacuzzi? Well, call Roto-Rooter!”

“I hate it when people are at you house and ask, ‘hey do you have a bathroom?’ No not at all...”

[narzissenkreuz-ordo]

wrio brain on temporary pause. i miss wetrabbit

thinking abt more archon quest rewrite details. where her trust in neuvi wavers after he (and furinas) first meeting w the knave. becauae the knave drops the bomb thag niko has been alive this whole in her care, and neuvillette knew. to try to stir up shit in hopes of getting more answers from either neuvi or silvie

and the two other times arle and silvie meet before the prophecy is dealt with arle is like a little bird trying to coax information abt neuvi out of silvanus and playing right into her insecurities:

that silvanus is constantly reminded that she is only mortal compared to all the gods and dragons around her and that she cannot offer anything of value, especially while also being sick

[froguemorgue]

you know, i need someone to tell this to, and unfortunately for you, you have been randomly selected as that person.

Alexander Hamilton's biracial cousin once removed aka Peter Lytton's son was called Don Alvarez de Velasco (you prolly know that) now as non-spanish speaker what i didn't realize was that his ma had essentially named him Lord de Velasco. and by GOD do i need the story behind it. is it like when black men would be named Mister so that their white peers couldn't sidestep the honorific? was there something else at play? Did they live a good life after Peter Lytton's death? mulattos could at the very least reach the upper rungs of society in the Carribean and being a Lytton has to count for /something/ so did Alvarez ever "rise" in Crucian society in so much as he could? Did his mother call him Don or Alvarez?

ofc, im not asking you this directly. but its just. he's been reduced to alexander hamilton's cousin's bastard biracial son and drops off mention in any text i could find. granted I'm also driving my chariot through that road because i don't know another road. the only other mention i came across was a historical society in st croix hosting a lecture titled with his name and was about the lives of mulattos i think, i believe. i was desperate for some info on this figure that i even wrote a mail to the society that was prolly promptly deleted as spam because of how stupidly it was written

who was he, yknw? i wonder if we'll ever know

did you ever have a figure like this? atp I'm just yappin lmao sorry for the long ask!

HOW DID I MISS THIS? i still love you, sorry, was not ignoring you!!

When you ask about whether I have historical figures like this I wonder about, YES! and they're almost always women or non-white people. We know their names (if that) and their general relation to the White Dudes history focuses on. It isn't often we know much else, even with some deep dives into any primary documents and context that would clue us into the rest. Wish they'd all just keep diaries, hahhaha. Of course that wasn't always possible and so many people, if they were even literate or had the means to keep diaries, wouldn't even write about themselves in complete honesty. History loves writers because their poetry, fiction, diaries, pamphlets, and letters give us more to learn about. Again, it was such a privilege to be a writer at all, and people marginalized by history and modernity are disproportionately affected by systemic erasure of their existence. History is told by the victors, or whatever they say.

I'd say I wonder about most historical figures, but somebody like Hamilton's cousin is up there for sure. His mother has always piqued my curiosity because obviously her ex husband Lavien was a major POS but history remembers HER exactly how he wanted her to be remembered: a whore. It pisses me off when biographers (r-r-r-ron) reduce her to that, and as a result, LMM's impression of her in the musical was much of the same and it's TRAGIC UGHHHH. It's actually so disgustinf that I start to foam at the mouth because what a fucking injustice.

After your message to my inbox and during my subsequent response, I actually started to go on a rabbit hole reading AGAIN about Alexander's childhood because the number of times he moved, the adults involved in his life, and how he was treated because of his illegitimacy makes it hard to remember exactly what went down. Now added to the list: Hamilton's cousin once removed who happened to be mixed. And though I will not reduce Alvarez to a prop on his own, how interesting to better understand Lytton, right? Of course every person's existence contextualizes other people, but with that said, understanding Don Alvarez as his own person is much more interesting. I'm happy knowing as the years go on, more and more colleges and historical societies are funding and publishing research for biracial, Black and Indigenous people in history, as it seems the Liberal Arts College of the Virgin Islands has done. And yet... the lack of readable information about Don Alvarez online is so, so disheartening.

If you can't contact the historian and speaker for that talk on Crucian Lifestyles, your only recourse is to go out there and dig through mountains of archives until you can find it out yourself. curiosity is so draining

[sword-symphonia]

Hi, I'm Luca or Crab- either works. If you recognise this username, you may know me for my AO3 account where I write silly words and publish them for my future employers to find later. I have no idea how to use tumblr and frankly I'm scared to learn, but I wanted an excuse to have another platform to go batshit crazy on. So, what do we gotta know about silly lil me?

•I write stories. I also take requests for stories. Please give me requests. Please. Pretty please.

•So long as you don't perceive me as male, I legitimately could not care less how you refer to me. She/her is preferred, but xe/xem fuckin' rocks too. 'Male' terms (dude, bro, sir etc) are fine, I don't care- so long as you don't see me as. A guy. I dunno, it's weird. I'm a man in the sense of boats and cars being women. Also, no he/him, thank you. Makes me feel sticky. Eurgh.

•I'm prone to cursing a lot, so I'm sorry if that gets irritating at any point.

•I genuinely never shut the hell up. I'm insufferable. Do not bring up my interests around me unless you want me to ramble for seven hours.

•IRELAND RAHHHHH (I take my identity as an Irish woman incredibly seriously for reasons unknown even to myself so very sorry if I suddenly start goin wild about that)

•I like a lot of things!!! So many fandoms!!! GOD HELP ME!!!

•Men over the age of thirty send tweet

•My favourite Animal Crossing villagers are Ribbot, Jeremiah and Stella. I share my birthday with Maddie and Niko. If I were an Animal Crossing villager I'd be a rabbit. Probably. I'unno.

•Excessive NSFW's a bit iffy to me, but at the end of the day I don't care all that much. Just know when to tone it down a bit, is all. (And of course tell me to pull my socks up a bit if I start getting a bit too ridiculous)

•I draw pictures sometimes, so I might?? Question mark? Post art? I'unno

•When I grow up (I'm seventeen help me) I wanna work in animation and voiceover WAOW!! Currently working on interviewing my favourite voice actors for career research

•I have crippling anxiety, please be patient with me. Sometimes the prospect of breathing sends me spiralling.

I can't think of anything else to say. Does Tumblr have a character limit? I've been doin an awful lot of yappin and I fear I shall be penalised

Alright bye obligatory stupid image (I have the humour of a twelve year old boy)

[lily-valley-hyperfixates]

hi there! it makes me unreasonably happy to see anyone gushing abt sherlock holmes so take this ask as an opportunity to yap (especially re: granada holmes pls, if u don’t mind) however long u want 🤎 also BOY do i understand ur impulse to talk & talk abt him bc, -and nobody ever tells u this- once holmes gets in ur brain, u will ALWAYS find him there. crawling around. the sneaky bastard ;) okay bye

actually, two other things: firstly (in response to ur tags on a post) YES IT IS ALWAYS 1895 FOR THEM. may i direct u towards this poem, which btw leaves me an emotional mess every time i think of it???? secondly, which is your favourite sh story?

HELLO FELLOW SHERLOCK ENJOYER!!! Thank you so much for this ask, gushing about Sherlock Holmes is quite literally my favorite hobby right now. Especially especially Granada Holmes which is so???? It’s just such a breath of fresh air in compared to the common pop culture view on Sherlock and Watson. Everyone and their mom has said this but it’s so awesome to see a Sherlock who actually cares about people and a Watson who is allowed to be competent!!! On top of that, it’s just really, really fun to see people and places from the stories come to life in the very specific way of Granada Holmes. I’m still watching through the episodes (very slowly, it’s taking me a hot second!) but I am enjoying every minute of it.

You so right about how once you’re a Sherlock Holmes enjoyer, you’re ALWAYS a Sherlock Holmes enjoyer; you literally cannot shake the man. Every few years or so, I have a hardcore Sherlock Holmes relapse where like I fall completely down the rabbit hole again, and I’m currently in the middle of a relapse now (couldn’t be happier about it tbh!!!) also you saying he’s crawling around in my brain seriously makes me picture him in the same position as my banner (for posterity: Sherlock Holmes is on his stomach investigating something on the ground) which is very silly. Actually that’s one of my favorite Holmes illustrations!!!

Also: YES I HAVE READ THAT ONE POEM AND IT ALWAYS FUCKING GETS ME…….like damn it’s always 1895 for them……..and for the readers…….and like idk……..that poem’s just so good <3

Favorite Sherlock Holmes story is a tough one, partially because I haven’t finished all of them yet (working on it, though!) Right now, I’d have to say “Copper Beeches,” mostly because the solution to that one is both very satisfying (aka I came to the same conclusion and it was very rewarding to be right) but also because of the interesting way it frames women’s roles in that story. I don’t want to spoil it here, but it gets very gothic and Jane Eyre-y, plus the character of Violet Hunter is so great!!! I’m not a fan of the characterization of her as another Sherlock love interest (some people do that, which I completely respect!!!), I kind of saw the relationship as more protective than anything else, where she’s in this bad spot and Sherlock is very concerned for her in that way. She’s super capable and smart, both in accepting the job and then very very quickly realizing that something is up with her boss. Maybe the conclusion is a little quick? But it’s also very satisfying and everything turns out well! Also the final confrontation with the criminal at the end actually made me gasp, specifically in how he gets seriously injured. The dog really came in with the steel chair fr fr

Anyways thank you for this ask!!! I always love yappin about Sherlock Holmes, I think about him all the time <3

[joemerl]

Writer’s Month 2021, Day 21: “Vampires/Werewolves AU”

Original fiction, specifically “the Werewolf Vampire WIP”

Word count: 848

Author’s notes: I chose to interpret this prompt as “make your werewolf OCs into vampires AU.”

The whole thing about sunlight hurting vampires was made up for the movies. What actually happens is that Randall and I can’t use our powers during the day. I like that—it makes me feel like I’m actually human. At least as long as I don’t try to eat normal food or something.

I could feel the vampirism returning when the sun went down; it was unsettling in a way that’s hard to describe. I felt colder, and then hungrier, especially if I used my powers for anything. Even if I didn’t, we could only go so long before we have to eat something.

So about once per week, Randall and I head out into the forest.

More recently, our little brother comes along.

"Don’t run so fast this time,” Con complained, shining his flashlight in every direction as we walked down the path. “I can’t see you do it if you run too fast.”

“You shouldn’t be watching us at all.”

“Randall says I getta!”

"Let’s not start on this again,” Randall moaned.

"I’m gonna be a vampire too, soon, so I getta—”

“Con, simmer down. You’re gonna scare everything away if you keep yappin’.” Randall handed him his flashlight, and I reluctantly did the same. “Alright, now you stay here, little pup. Curt and I will be right back.”

With that, he turned into a bat. I hesitated for a moment before doing the same.

I don’t like being a bat. My bat body just feels wrong, too small and hairy and gross. Bats aren’t the best animal to turn into. Flying sounds fun, but in practice it’s a lot of flapping until your wings ache, and the act of transforming just makes you hungrier.  

Echolocating is weird. It’s like, screaming and somehow feeling everything that you scream at. Which is mostly a lot of trees. It took us a while before we found a deer in a clearing.

We rejoined Con, turned back into ourselves, and Randall said “Alright, we found something. Now just—” 

“Was it a deer or a rabbit?”

“A deer, and be quiet. Now c’mon.”

We crept through the trees with Con following behind us. It would have been easier just to attack it from the air, but no, we have to include Con because he’s a little psychopath who thinks that being a vampire is fun. The kid needed therapy, not hunting lessons.  

My stomach growled, and I was starting to feel weary. I hated feeding, but I was really, really hungry.

The deer was still in the clearing when we arrived. We hid in the bushes, watching it for a moment. Con started to tremble with excitement. 

"Alright, how do you want to do this?” Randall asked.

“I don’t.”

He ignored me. “Sneak over as bats? Wolves? Or maybe just—”

“It's looking at us!”

If it hadn’t seen us already, Con’s cry would have definitely alerted it. The deer stared in our direction, and I felt myself tense; Randall was frozen beside me. I felt another ache in my stomach, and I could somehow feel the deer’s blood coursing through its veins, the same way that I felt its body from up in the air. My mouth was dry, my throat burned, and I grimaced, determined.

I hated to feed, but I was going to have that deer.

“Nobody m—” Randall began, but I had already leaped over the bush and rushed at it.

It ran. Made it out of the clearing in less than two seconds. I ran after it, my shoes sinking in the soft direct, my mouth twisting into a fanged snarl.

Deer can run about thirty miles per hour. A fast human, like a marathon runner, can generally manage about half that.

I’m a vampire. I caught the deer.

I leaped on its back, bit down on its neck, and then braced myself as it thrashed wildly like a bull. I bit down harder, and as I did, I felt its warm, coppery blood fill my mouth. I wanted to spit it out and slurp it down at the same time. I did the latter, moaning with relief as my hunger and thirst began to recede.

The deer fell down. I kept drinking until Randall and Con caught up with us. I dislodged my fangs with effort, standing up awkwardly and wiping blood from my chin. I spat a few times, trying to get fur out of my mouth.

"Okay,” Randall said vaguely, giving me a slap on the arm. “Good work, Curt.”

“It was so cool!” Con gushed; this is the closest he ever comes to admiring me. “You were like—whoosh!″

I nodded grimly. I’m usually the one who makes our kills. Randall is too cautious, even though he finds it less disgusting than I do.

The deer was still breathing faintly as Randall got onto his knees; it let out a weak cry as he began to drink from it. I was still thirsty, but I backed away, licking my lips. There was still some blood there. I hated how much I enjoyed the taste.