#queer subtext still has a very important place in media

[vegasvictor]

queer subtext is where it's at forever and you'll never take that away from me

[funnylovepuppis]

I should probably shut up about it because there is so many other people talking about it. But I can't stay silent about it. I can't stress enough how upset and uncomfortable I am with being here in buddie fandom right now.

As a bisexual myself, I agree with the importance of its representation in mainstream media. Especially when it comes to male characters, who are really low in static speaking. We can all agree on this, and hopefully, we can all see it. I'm really thrilled about Bi Buck's journey and about finding his happiness. He's not fixed, he just found out about his other sides he never knew they were existed before. As @m3r1m4r5u333 said in their post, bisexuality is not a personality, just a small piece in whatever color that is a part of many more pieces of soul. Buck, like many real-life people, is trying to figure out himself. I honestly don't think that self-journey will ever stop, not just on sexuality but on many other things. That's how living is, right? So yes, it's very exciting and kind of carefree for him, and I'm truly happy. He deserves it big time after all that he has been through. And I really think that Tommy is genuinely the right person for him at the moment.

But aside from me being bi, I'm also demisexual. Honestly it's more than that for me, because besides the need for emotional connection before sexual intimacy, I need some degrees of emotional connection before even getting into dating. So as you can see, I'm very much attached to Buck and Eddie relationship. I'm mostly finding myself a lot in Eddie's character. I do feel a lot of pressure on starting to date someone nowadays. And I'd probably be single for a long time because that's kinda how how people go to date. You meet someone you like and interested to explore the romantic dynamic and that someone is a completely stranger to you so it's kind of scary and stressful.. I'd rather be someone's friend and then lover..

Yes, best friends have a different kind of love than just two friends. That doesn't necessarily mean that it must have a romance subtext or under the surface, especially when it comes to two people of the same gender. And sure, all the things related to buddie are open to interpretations and any ways that people who see it differently are pretty legit.

We can argue about why things are the way they are. I can acknowledge that Eddie is not in the same emotional place as Buck, and it can be taking a long process for him, if at all, to realize his own feelings about himself and Buck. But at the same time, I can say that although it seems like Buck and Eddie communicate in a very healthy way, there's a sense of underground miscommunication that leaves both of them scared to make a move or talk about their deep feelings and observations on their own relationship. Because what they have is great, so why ruin it for a good change, right? And there is lots of evidence that saying buddie are partially soulmates. Having back from each other. Their reactions are when the other one is in a dangerous situation, such as the firetruck, the wall, the shooting, and the lighting strike. The will. The family moments of Buckley-Diaz. Going to each other's home as a safe place. The teasing from surrounding people about them. The jealousy. Their parallels to other couples on the show/

I guess I'm trying to say to the people who are feeling like some people are not very happy about Bucktommy because they are not appreciative of the new queer couple or the very fact that it's B-Buck canon. I understand the need for bi-representations and am happy to see that. It seems very worth the long wait for this. And yet, I want to say, give buddie stans time, including me. Because our feelings are legitimate and matter, too. It may come as rude or not excited about Bucktommy, but I think this is coming from being afraid and uncomfortable with how quickly many people from the fandom are shifting from Buddie to Bucktommy, even if they still believe in Buddie Endgame. Give us time to fall in love with this couple and connect with them. Give us time to warm up for them. Give us time because we have been attached to Buddie for 5 long years. We have been memorizing all of the episodes, plots, and quotes. Writing for 5 years, Buddie fics. Making beautiful gifsets and fan art.

Thank you for reading this if you have reached this far. 🩷

[moriarty1234]

T*LC Refutation (but decidedly NOT johnlock refutation)

[Note: I love and ship johnlock because I saw it for myself in the show when I watched it and was part of the general audience in the past. I even want it to become canon in some Holmes adaption in the future. But T*lc needs to get sucked into obscurity and forgotten. Other fandoms like Good Omens, etc., are following the same rhetoric in their "meta" posts, and that needs to go. This is crucial for our basic critical thinking skills and objectivity.]

Read Part - 3 : Everything wrong with "subtexts" and "symbolisms" here.

Part-4: The Harmful Aspect of T*LC:

Let's move on to some more serious issues, or why we (Kim and I) don't believe for even a second that hardcore t*lcers (the ones who're rabid about this theory) ever cared for any type of representation, or even johnlock in itself for that matter.

I say hardcore t*lcers because the normal ones simply believe in t*lc and keep that shit to themselves. I'm even mutuals with them on Tumblr (although I know that when the show was on air, hardcore, insufferable, and deeply problematic t*lcers were in the majority).

1.) The very definition of t*lc : The general idea of t*lc is that johnlock has been planned since 2010 (right from the first episode of S1), this whole show is essentially a love story between Sherlock and John, the cases are not so important, and that johnlock is going to be the endgame canon ship. When the writers deny anything related to johnlock in their own show, they're lying to keep their elaborate plan under the wraps. When Sherlock and John kiss on screen, it'll be a rug pull moment for all the non-believers, their love story will be groundbreaking queer representation in mainstream media, and BBC Sherlock will become a culturally iconic Holmes adaptation. Because sometimes, the queer characters can be the heroes of the story.

All this sounded so nice and fancy to me when I was new to shipping johnlock. Because BBC Sherlock was my first fandom that I ever participated in. Johnlock was (and is) my first ship. I used to be a non-shipper before this, because I'm not exactly a Romance-genre fan in published fiction.

Now I don't like the general idea of this at all. Not because I don't want johnlock to become canon in some version (I really do), but there are so many flaws in the very idea of t*lc.

a.) They didn't even plan what they were going to do with Rosie Watson in S4. They just introduced the pregnancy subplot to raise the stakes in HLV. Only for shock value purposes. This was Mark Gatiss' statement (now I can't find the link but I've seen an article about this before). To think they'd planned an entire romance storyline, but it was just under the wraps the whole time, is unrealistic.

b.) While it's true that showrunners or directors do lie to their fans before a work is published to maintain an element of surprise, Moffat and Gatiss had denied anything related to johnlock too many times, and almost vehemently for most viewers to believe that they're just lying. One can only lie too many times, after all. And something needs to be there in the actual show for (maximum) fans to catch on that they're indeed just lying. There wasn't enough evidence for that. Too many of those scenes just came off as gay jokes instead of anything of real substance. That wasn't a good look.

c.) The third part is really what gets me the most here, and one of the main reasons why Kim and I began to actively despise t*lc, even though we're both still pro-johnlock. These people really thought the ultimate rug pull moment for the entire audience should be... that John and Sherlock are in love? Really? That's it? That's highest standard you have for supposedly groundbreaking queer representation? That doesn't sound right. Queer representation really shouldn't be used for shock value. As if we're not marginalised and isolated from most people already. Especially in my country. That just sounds as though you want to place these two characters in a museum as though they're some exotic beings or something. That's the opposite of a healthy queer rep.

d.) Even if johnlock were canon, it would've hardly been groundbreaking for the purposes of queer representation. Even in the 2010s. Because shows like Breaking Bad (a show from 2008, i.e., before BBC Sherlock, in which a very significant character is canonically gay and black), Elementary (where Mrs Hudson is canonically trans, Joan Watson is a well written character even as a poc female lead, Jamie Moriarty is also properly characterised when mainstream media doesn't have a lot of well-written female villains to begin with), London Spy (which is also a BBC show from 2015), Money Heist (which also features a significant canonically gay character), etc., still existed. I'll even list The Irregulars as an example, even though the first season of that show was aired in 2021, because that was still before the Sherlock Holmes franchise entered the public domain. Watson is canonically gay and black in that one.

e.) This is a detective show you're talking about. Cases aren't important? You kidding me?

2.) Rabid t*lcers were hypocritical as hell. They used to demand canon johnlock for "representation", but they were all sorts of bigoted people themselves.

a.) They made racist comments about Lucy Liu.

(From Sarah Z's video) :

They've called slurs to fans of colour in the fandom (I can think of one fan specifically right now) for not shipping johnlock.

b.) Characterising Sherlock as a twink, gay baby, or "smol" is fetishistic. It's just homophobia indirectly.

c.) They went rabid about the bisexual Sherlock headcanon, Instead of simply disagreeing with it for whatever reason. You're not doing the queer community any favours by h/cing John as bisexual just for your johnlock shipping, only because he has canonically shown attraction to women.

See this:

Stop playing the victim card right after perpetuating biphobia lol. You need to rewatch the show if you think mere fascination was all he felt for Irene. Also, even if he genuinely didn't show any attraction to any woman in canon, fanon can still be its own thing. Not everything has to be strictly canon compliant.

One more:

Stop straw manning and assuming real people's sexuality. Stop ship bashing. Enough with the biphobia.

This person is a johnlocker and "The One" obviously means johnlock here. No, not everyone is uncomfortable because of johnlock for bigoted reasons. People are allowed to have preferences.

Another one (probably my favourite) :

Talk about hypocrisy. The title of this post sounds so positive to bisexuality, but then OP goes right ahead to frantically claim Sherlock is 100% gay and not anything else!!! 1!!

Sherlock is heavily queercoded in the show, I agree. I don't even care whether that was the authorial intent or not at this point. That's what a non-insignificant amount of people took away from this show.

But his canon sexuality was never specified. People are allowed to interpret his sexuality however they want. You are nobody to state your own headcanons as facts.

More hypocrisy.

d.) The acephobia was rampant in this fandom mostly because of these people. It's a well-documented fact.

e.) The misogyny in this fandom was ugly. The kind of outlandish metas they write trying to disprove adl*ck from the show... jeez. If adl*ck definitely doesn't exist in this show, why would you need to disprove it so many times through your meta posts?

Can't erase something that really isn't there, just saying.

"Irene is just a personification of Sherlock's libido for John." Seriously? Do you even listen to yourself?

Don't get me wrong. I blame Mofftiss equally as much for not writing women properly in general, Irene Adler in particular. They butchered canon Irene Adler (a queen) way too much in their show. But the fans' response to her was almost worst.

It's understandable if the show's version of Mary doesn't sit right with you for whatever reason. People are allowed to have preferences. Personally, I'm quite neutral about Mary Morstan in this show.

But these people used to take their hate for her too far. These people have never been as mad at Moriarty, or even at Culverton Smith, as they all were at Mary for shooting Sherlock. Again, this is a crime drama show. Not all characters are going to be sunshine and roses.

3.) Rabid t*lcers hardly ever tried to explore johnlock in other versions. If you're a fan of Sherlock Holmes, you'll be at least curious about different adaptations that exist out there. Why did they hardly ever posted about The Irregulars when it was aired? An adaptation in which Watson is canonically in love with Holmes? I've been around in the johnlock fandom enough to know that the rabid t*lcers (NOT ALL T*LCers) never really cared about the possibility of johnlock in some other version after it ultimately didn't become canon in BBC Sherlock. They only care for johnlock as long as Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman are associated with it.

... Yup.

(ACD canon Watson was in his early thirties in the first novel. That's not middle aged. Joanlock didn't even become canon - something that was specified since Day 1 - in Elementary lmfao. Also, Lucy Liu was in her forties when Elementary aired. Get your facts straight.)

All these three points are enough to conclude that what t*lcers usually posted about was obviously not "demand for representation", but rather a demand for some extremely specific fantasies acted out on screen with an even more specific choice of actors.

I even joked to Kim about this: The stuff they demand for is so extremely specific that it sounds like a Starbucks order lol.

Part: 5 - Conclusion:

I want johnlock to become canon in some version of Sherlock Holmes adaptation. But I want t*lc as a theory to be completely forgotten and obscured. T*lc is definitely not the way to go about it. Other fandoms (namely Good Omens) have started to write "metas" with the exact same rhetoric in them, and now it's completely unacceptable. It's 2024 now. Let it go.

Some interesting links Kim and I found that are very insightful and relevant to this post:

About cults and the followers

Cult psychology

Conspiracy theory psychology

Science vs pseudo-science

Science vs psudo-science - 2

Conspiracy theory psychology - 2

Signs someone is a pseudo-intellectual

One explanation why even otherwise sensible people seem to believe in t*lc

PS: Not every dark haired character/ blond character is a Sherlock/John mirror respectively. That's not how character-mirroring works. Experts would know this.

T*LC refutation (but NOT johnlock) refutation master post.

[jaskierx]

little pre-warning for suicide (i'm fine though!!)

sorry if this isn't articulated very well but like. i got into ofmd only last october when season 2 was airing and i still remember it's bc i got a clip on tiktok of the "is that blackbeard?" "no, i'm blackbeard" scene which is SUCH a good fucking hook btw. and before watching it i kind of actually hated it LOL like people do with anything that's popular and Everywhere it just oversaturates sometimes. and it made me feel kind of silly to go back on my own opinion but i didn't even really dwell on that bc me getting into it also happened to coincide with a failed suicide attempt (that kind of funnily also included a gun that misfired like in-show lol). and like i was pretty understandably all over the place, but generally still in the "i want to live" moment that happens right after you nearly properly die. and the thing about suicide recovery is that you don't actually want to recover. so it was a really up and down left and right kind of situation and you're left feeling kind of like a puppet with no strings that's also been thrown into the ocean or something.

but then i liked this show that was funny and silly and i also got to see trans and gay people existing happily and normally which isn't necessarily NEW but it did feel really cool and unique to be able to go Oh and this is the moment where they would usually leave it to subtext and then they actually KISS and it's like woahhhh. i didn't know they could do that... and then as i was still processing what was happening with my own life and like mortality i got to see this character go through the exact same thing and come out on the other side of it ENTIRELY by himself and experience love and self determination and actualisation and i'm not saying it made me want to do it myself but it did feel like a really personal thing for me (hence anon also lol).

and for the few weeks it was coming out i got to sit there and think about how he was doing and it gave me another reason to not do something again. like i am so definitely not the only one who can say "this show saved my life" but honestly it literally did. like there's that thing when you're suicidal where the things that you're sticking around for are the only things you've got so they're as important as anything even if it's like... going to a concert the following week or something. or getting a burger. and i really honestly stuck around just to love this show and my cat.

it's been a few months now ofc and it still sucks and i'm not better or anything but being able to indulge in something fun for fun's sake is the biggest source of joy in my life and tbh it's not gonna go away just because there's going to be no season 3. when i'm feeling too much of particularly anything i have a handy little balm which i know everyone feels but still. a little gifset of ed always makes me feel better if i'm freaking out so it's cool i don't care if it's a bit lame. i'm a bit sad for season 3 and everyone being sad is also making me sadder but i still have a lot of love left so ah. it'll be fine :)

if anything i hope this inspires people to have a little boom in the numbers re: content now that we know there'll be no canon to possibly diverge from and we can make up our OWN season 3 ‼️ which will be fun :)

hi anon sorry i didn't reply to this yesterday i wanted to sit and think about what to say

and then i didn't really come up with anything lmao other than you're right and i love you and i love this show and it's so incredibly important to me and so groundbreaking in so many ways and has made me feel seen in a way that no other piece of media ever has. the queer rep is groundbreaking. the portrayal of ed's suicidality moved me beyond words. there are dozens of other people sharing stories about how ofmd helped them to come out or meet their partner or start transitioning or quit something that was making them unhappy. i watched s2 at a time while i was really struggling with post-covid symptoms. i've met so many incredible people through this fandom. i think about the show dozens of times a day. the show brought me so much joy and they can't take that away

they can't ever take away how special it was and how much it's changed people's lives

i'm very excited to see what the amazing fic writers in this fandom are going to give us in place of s3. i just wish we could've had the rest of the story david wanted to tell

[oldtvandcomics]

Happy Queer Media Monday!

Today: Supernatural (2005 - 2020)

Oh dear. Here we go. Happy (belated) November 5th everyone!

(The infamous love confession that has become a meme used to talk about important news by having Dean reply with what happened. Put on a white background to avoid jumpscaring people.)

Supernatural is an US American TV show that aired on the network CW from 2005 to 2020. The story, originally spanning five seasons, tells the story of two brothers, Sam and Dean Winchester, whose single father specialized in hunting supernatural beings after their mother was killed in a mysterious incident. After the disappearance of their father, Sam and Dean take over the “family business”, and get quickly dragged into the beginnings of the Apocalypse.

Things… Got somewhat out of hand after this.

The first thing worth mentioning: Supernatural has always been rather meta. During those early seasons, there were episodes between the ones very important to the plot where the show just would poke fun of different aspects of the horror genre. In season 4, they revealed that the story of the show exists in-universe as a book series, with its own fandom. In the last few seasons, they leaned even more into the meta, by having the characters fight the author of said books, who turned out to be also God, for their right of self-determination.

Fandoms being fandoms, and Supernatural, due to its focus being on two brothers traveling from place to place lacking female characters, the main ship for the first few seasons was the one where people were shipping Sam and Dean together, a thing the show itself comments on with the in-universe book fandom. This changed when season 4 introduced a new character, the angel Castiel (nicknamed “Cas”), who quickly became an ally of the brothers and formed an especially deep connection with Dean. The Dean/Castiel ship, or “Destiel” quickly became very popular with the fans.

In the late 2000’s and the early 2010’s, queer representation was still rather rare, and much of it was happening in subtext. Many people latched on to Supernatural, as the shipping aspect was compelling and it actually did feature some queer side characters in more or less important roles. The Supernatural fandom became very prominent on, among other early social media platforms, Tumblr, where people for a while enjoyed themselves imagining a crossover AU between Supernatural, Doctor Who and BBC’s Sherlock - the infamous SuperWhoLock that said people remember with a very vivid mix of emotions.

Due to its popularity, Supernatural kept getting renewed. The writers therefore had to keep coming up with new plots, and so they expanded the Heaven and Hell aspect of their world with, among others, Purgatory, power struggles within both Heaven and Hell, a special place where angels go after their death named “The Empty”, and finally having everyone fight God. While the core of the story remained the same - two brothers travelling through the US and fighting demons - other side characters were added from time to time, and usually killed off eventually. Many of them were, in one way or another, queer. But what really kept the fans engaged was the dynamic between Dean and Cas. It didn’t really go anywhere, making Supernatural in the eyes of many a posterchild of queerbaiting (pretending to include queer content for the sake of attracting audiences, with no intention of following through).

The show ended in 2020 after 15 seasons. The third-to-last episode ends with Castiel confessing his love for Dean and being taken to the Empty as a direct consequence. He is not seen and barely mentioned after that, and Dean is so shocked that he doesn’t get to properly react.

This resulted in mass hysteria among fans, former fans, and people who had been exposed to Supernatural and Destiel by proxy. Tumblr crashed. The episode got mixed together with the other trending topic of the ongoing US elections. Supernatural trended higher than the elections. People were making memes about it, and started to call the Empty “gay super hell”. The emotion of it is difficult to describe to those who haven’t witnessed it with the context of many years of Dean and Cas being firmly kept subtext. This event in fandom history has become known simply as “Nov 5th”. We still celebrate its anniversary on Tumblr. Destiel became firmly linked to current events, and people started to edit the love confession in a way that Cas says “I love you” and Dean replies with the current news. 

An imperfect rendition, but YouTuber ColeyDoesThings’ video might give you an idea what the emotional turmoil was like after the love confession. If you want more about the mess around the finale and the things that came after, please go ask somebody else. It is a VERY long and complex story, and I’m neither able nor willing to try and sum it up coherently. If you want to know about the various spin-off series of Supernatural, this article will give you a place to start. I would also like to recommend Tumblr user @whyissupernaturaltrending who, every time that Supernatural trends, explains what TF happened this time.

Queer Media Monday is an action I started to talk about some important and/or interesting parts of our queer heritage, that people, especially young people who are only just beginning to discover the wealth of stories out there, should be aware of. Please feel free to join in on the fun and make your own posts about things you personally find important!

[bookshelfdreams]

Im sorry about this i need to rant. I thought things were getting better but Izzy stan Twitter is at it again with their whining, truth bending and self-victimising.

'Do you like OMFD but wish the queer disabled hero didnt die?' IZZY IS NOT THE HERO OF THIS SHOW!!!!! He is at best a reformed antagonist. What an insult to the other disabled characters, and what about the actual heroes of the show??

'We've been betrayed by straight man writing queer stories'. First of all, way to dismiss the other writers. Also, its not his fault you project your personal traumas and mental health on a fictional character on a show with death in the title.

'GB's ending is comphet (?????) because 'we only need eachother' and theyre breaking away from their queer community' ED HAS BEEN WANTING TO LEAVE PIRACY SINCE LAST SEASON!!! also, its progress that Stede was able to resist basic flattery. And David made it clear that they still have work to do. This one truly broke my brain.

Im just sick of all this. Izzy stans have been coddled for the past week, being told its ok to grieve, but theyve crossed multiple lines. I do wish some things had been more explicit in this finale, only because David overestimated the maturity and media literacy of some people.

Sorry for this but i needed to talk to people here. Its beyond annoyance at this point. Im angry and sick of petty crybabies actively working to poison what we've built.

Don't apologize, feel free to rant at me any time!

"The Blackbonnet ending is comphet" surely is A Take, let me add that to the It's Only Queer If It's Subtext Collection, also featuring such gems as

The Lupete marriage proposal/wedding was basically straight

Canon queer ships are boring and unimportant

Izzy has the only queer arc

Izzy is the only "convincingly" queer character

It's super interesting to see this develop. The massive victim/persecution complex of a certain subset of Izzy fans. The vitriol leveled against all other fans, and the show itself, because clearly, these people never liked ofmd in the first place. Never liked what it actually had to say and instead, invented subtext that was never there to look into instead. It's like watching the birth of a conspiracy theory under controlled conditions in a petry dish. You will see these people say with their whole chest the most unhinged bullshit imaginable and receive praise for it, but when you keep in mind that for months, they have discussed the show Izzy in their insular little echo chambers, most of their takes become a lot more understandable. There's robust internal logic, even though, due to the flawed premise, none of it makes any sense.

But it becomes understandable when we loop back around to the point that a lot of these people don't engage with the show on its own merit. They really treat it as if it were just another queerbaity (maybe not even that) mid-2010s thing, too afraid to do something different.

ofmd is not that! But when all you have is a hammer. And when you're surrounded by people who keep insisting that yes, obviously that problem is a nail. That one too. Nails are all that exist. yk.

But. And please know that I am holding your hands and speak as gently as I can when I say this.

But please don't get angry about this? If this whole drama genuinely upsets you, you might need to take a step back and remind yourself that it's just fandom. It's just some idiots somewhere enjoying the pirate show wrong. It's not that important. There's plenty of things that are worth your anger in the world right now. Everything is fucked. But this isn't one of them.

Like, for me, this is fun. I am a petty bitch, I love to gawk at bad takes, I love conspiracy theories, reading things like this tickles my brain in the best possible way. It's like reading through the Psiram wiki (which is also something I do for fun. Yes, I am aware there's something wrong with me). It's even better, because it's inconsequential. It doesn't have very real human misery attached to it.

Like, obviously i think it's fine to be opinionated about dumb bullshit on the internet, and while picking fights with people who don't agree with me isn't something I enjoy personally, some people do and there's nothing wrong with that either. As long as everyone involved is having fun.

But. You gotta keep your distance, you know? Don't get personally mad at people with bad opinions. Having wrong opinions about the pirate show isn't actually harmful. Fandom isn't activism.

[dinitride-art]

This reminds me about the difference between queer representation in film and other forms of media. Like, recently When you Finish Saving the World came out and while I didn’t see it myself, I did see that people were saying Ziggy had an ex-boyfriend in the book that I don’t know whether or not it was mentioned in the film adaptation. I wouldn’t be surprised if it wasn’t. I’m thinking of how Simon vs. The Homosapiens Agenda was adapted in to Love, Simon, too. Leah’s characterization is very different in the movie than what it was in the book. It was changed to be less complex and more consumable to heteronormative audiences. Her character motivations shifted from being Simon’s best friend who was hurt that he didn’t come out to her before Abby, to her reaction to Simon being outed as a result of homophobia. Haven’t seen of read it in a hot minute but the point I’m trying to make here is that there is a lot of queer representation in media, it’s just boxed away where the average cis het person can’t find it. So, when we’re represented in places that aren’t strictly in that box (or outside of it, basically anywhere that counts as popular media) everything gets watered down.

Netflix is an important factor to consider in how Stranger Things is allowed to portray its queer characters. I don’t think that they would’ve let season four go any further than it did with queer representation because of a potential loss of viewership. It’s very probable that the Duffers have had to fight with Netflix about what they’re allowed to say and show in their story. Robin is the only explicitly queer character in Stranger Things. Every other character is up to interpretation. People can deny Will being gay, can deny Vickie being bi, because their identities aren’t stated or shown in a way that makes them undeniable to the audience. Will is heavily implied to have romantic feelings about Mike but no one ever says it. Not in the same way that Robin told Steve that she had a crush on a girl when they were high in season three. Vickie is the same. It’s implied that she might have feelings for Robin but never stated. Subtext is the main way that Stranger Things presents its queer characters. But I don’t think that it’s going to stay that way.

The subtext isn’t simple. It’s almost overwhelming complex and is telling an entire story that most people aren’t able to pick up on. The California/Road-trip plot-line in season four is probably the most extreme example of this. I think that the reason that Will is glowing whenever Mike looks at him, and why there’s a hidden confession behind a painting, and references to the rain fight in season three, and an entire plot-line dedicated to Mike and Will’s relationship development is because they weren’t allowed to explicitly tell the audience what was happening with them in season four. But they’re still telling the story they want to tell, just in a different way. I don’t think anyone puts that much effort into something for a plot twist. I think it might be because someone told them no. Robin and Vickie are already pushing what is generally allowed in popular media. They’re two queer characters with very human experiences. That people can relate to whether or not they’re queer themselves. Vickie isn’t as well developed as Robin, but Robin- even though she’s often used as comic relief- is a complex character. She’s a queer character with a potential romantic plot-line and has important relationships with other characters. She’s also heavily implied to be neurodivergent. And she’s not dead.

Stranger Things isn’t perceived as a queer story. It’s at a point where it has complex queer characters but not to the point where it’s been labeled as queer media. If Mike and Will were both explicitly shown to be queer in season four, that would have pushed Stranger Things over the edge. Mike, Will and El are three of the most important characters in Stranger Things. That’s why they had two out of the four plot lines in season four. If Mike and El’s romantic relationship ended, Stranger Things would potentially have more people thinking about whether or not Mike and Will are an actual option, and whether or not Stranger Things is made for a heteronormative audience. This has already started to happen even with Mike and El’s ending the season with the future of their relationship being ambiguous. Even though Robin has a romantic subplot, and Vickie has been introduced, and Will is heavily implied to have romantic feelings for Miek, Stranger Things has not yet been labeled as queer media. I think that has more to do with Netflix than the Duffer brothers.

Queer people aren’t found in film or popular media a whole lot. And more often than not people have to push to be able to have queer characters and representation and relevance to the story. It’s also not uncommon for queer stories to be hidden behind an allegory or in subtext. The story that Stranger Things wants to tell is a queer story, which automatically makes Stranger Things queer media. Being labeled as queer media shoves it away into a hidden box away from anyone who doesn’t want to see it. But, at this point, Stranger Things has become too popular to be shoved into the dark. From the way that everything has been handled with Mike and Will, and Robin and Vickie, it’s clear that they’re trying to tell a queer story. The effort put into Mike and Will in every season shows that while this story is currently still subtextual, it’s something they want to explore and something that they’re not allowed to fully show, but they want to. I remember thinking, who would put this much effort into lighting Will like this? Why would anyone spend this much time on subtext that most people would never notice? And now, I think it’s possible, that they’re trying to tell this story in whatever way they can. And while its still not enough, I don’t think it’s by choice. But I also think that they’re going to tell this story no matter what.

we have 3 queer characters that haven't even kissed anyone of the same gender but the show is full of straight ships that have whole scenes of them making out and holding hands and like I know we will get explicit queerness in s5 but it still feels like I can't expect too much and like I shouldn't hope to have Elmax or Elumax too even if it has semi-romantic subtext in the show but I should be glad if I get the ones we already have even if we will have one season against 4 of straight people being straight and like I just think it's fucked up that I feel like this and I feel like that if the show is not made explicitly queer from the beginning then we should be happy if we get even one queer character... plus all the other queer shows are getting canceled or end up killing one in the couple or they have depressing storylines... it's so fucked up

[vanquishedvaliant]

If the gayness can be denied it can just as easily be called queerbaiting. Text (and subtext) is less impactful and meaningful than action, even in the right direction. I think if gay people say it's not good enough isn't that an indication that it isn't good enough or enough for them to feel represented?

No.

There’s been a concept in social media activism that the primary perceived value of queer content in media is how loudly it demonstrates inclusion of a particular identity, and a lot of popular media gets judged solely on this aspect, like it’s checking off a tickbox for binary approval. 

A kiss has been chosen by many of these circles to be the most concrete binary proof you can have for a character’s queer sexuality, but putting aside the fact that many identities don’t benefit from that at all; (theoretically a bi person would have to kiss 2 different genders to ‘prove’ themselves this way, why would a trans person kissing anyone prove anything, asexual or aromantic obviously inapplicable, etc) w 

It’s simply incorrect that text is less impactful than “action”, given that media is Text. The Text is what comprises its “action” and what it’s statement of intent is. A kiss is not action, a kiss is Text. A gay character that does kiss or meets whatever satisfaction the audience deems for “representation” is still a creation of Text as much as a gay character that never kisses anyone. There’s no separation there. This wholesale disregard of theme and meaning of text and subtext in fiction and instead only approving media-friendly headline screenshots is one of the greatest tragedies of modern popular culture.

Treating the ‘undeniable’ existence of a queer character as “action” and “representation’ and not examining the actual context of their inclusion and what the story says about their identity, their lives, and their experiences is how you get Disney’s First Gay Character popping up in the news twice a year- it’s become more important for the headlines to State that you have one than for them to actually be important or meaningfully written, or for the story to have anything to say about the character or their lives. At this point of popular social media understanding, Queerbaiting simply does not mean what people have begun to use it to describe. Queerbaiting was intended to refers to deliberate marketing attempts to accrue viewership by over-promising the presence or importance of queer content to Bait in queer viewers hoping to be included. The key part of Queerbaiting is the intentional misdirection here, and because of that there is a very important distinction between queer subtext that is created to build intentional undertones and that which is included specifically to tease and entice viewers with the promise of more.

Many anime shows that people accuse of queerbaiting are doing exactly the opposite; in the case of Flip Flappers the overwhelming Text of the story is largely and centrally focused on the burgeoning sexuality of a young girl as she grows up and realizes that what her heart desires may conflict with expectations set by herself, her family, and society at large. That remains true through to the end of the story where she makes a breakthrough in her understanding of herself and her place in life and her sexuality is a major part of that.

A kiss is not at all required for this, but because there isn’t one people somehow become convinced that the story is “baiting” them desptie the actual meat of the story itself being fundamentally about being queer. Now, there’s definitely room for subjective differences in appreciation here, especially taking more Yuri works as a whole (particular Slice of Life), in which many of them do place their queer undertones as a less central tenet that aren’t deeply explored. I’m not saying that you as an individual can’t feel that you’re not satisfied without a more substantial story; but it doesn’t mean these stories have Failed in their role of Representation; they still have value and purpose whether they meet that shallow criteria or not. And it doesn’t mean that they aren’t Real and these characters aren’t quite obviously gay to anyone paying even the slightest attention.

What I’m actually hearing most of the time is that people consider the capital r Representation buzzword to tick off a box of “HAS LESBIAN” to be more important to them than actually reading a Story about gay people that has something meaningful to say; Add further to this deeper disqualifying factors restricting death, tragedy, “unhealthy” relationships, etc. And you quickly begin to cut down the number of stories you accept to only those which portray a superficial, consumer-friendly veneer of queerness.

This is in itself a sanitization of Queer identity that doesn’t celebrate or represent anyone; it’s selling an idea of Queerness that is clean, palatable, easily accessed.

That’s simply not enough to satisfy me, and it shouldn’t be for you either. 

[ichayalovesyou]

I need to say my piece about SNW and the Spock/T’Pring shitstorm

I’m going to just say outright, first things first

It’s fucking annoying (and at it’s worst Pan/biphobic and sexist) that people are saying it’s homophobic/queerbaiting for the Strange New Worlds to explore the relationship between Spock and T’Pring.

Like, did I miss something or was that not a HUGE part of Spock’s life that we never got to see?? Like “Oh I’ve been unwillingly engaged to this woman since we were seven years old.” Isn’t an interesting character dynamic. It also really doesn’t have to be romantic, I mean, it’s probably gonna be to some degree but that’s not the point. They’re clearly at least no longer interested in each other by Amok Time. I think that counts for something.

I know that Spock being queer on some level is incredibly important to a lot of people, (including me!) and god knows we need more mlm representation in media but also like-

We HAVE K/S! Spirk is basically canon! Spock and T’Pring being betrothed and that being a significant element in his life. AND Spock still having a very obvious, deep established relationship with Kirk in TOS and subsequent films can and do exist in the same universe! Amok Time happened they went their separate ways. Exploring the T’Pring subplot does not magically negate almost three decades of extremely queer subtext! All Our Yesterdays doesn’t undo The Search for Spock!

What is wrong with Spock being bi/pan??? Absolutely nothing! It would honestly make sense given what happens in All Our Yesterdays, The Enterprise Incident and The Cloudkeepers, or AOS Spuhura while Spock and Kirk are still clearly interested in each other. Spock is still obviously in love with Jim and his relationship with Kirk always outlasts any interest in women Spock has had, but the fandom collectively ignores it in favor of interpreting Spock as gay. Which is fine! As long as you don’t get rancid about it!

If you can ignore those episodes and elements of the AOS movies in order to continue holding fast to the idea Spock’s gay you can ignore whatever romantic things they might do with Spock and T’Pring in SNW. Just like how you can headcanon him as aromantic asexual or transmasculine or whatever else you want. It’s fiction! Go nuts! Be free! Canon is a template the imagination is freedom. But don’t assume the worst from people who wrote canon.

Also this really feels like the (imo shitty and unnuanced) “T’Pring is the bad guy” hot take wearing a different hat. It’s the whole super unfair “let’s immediately vilify the woman in this story” shit all over again. T’Pring is just as trapped as Spock is in Amok Time, by traditions, and by the fact they don’t love each other (whether anymore is a preface to that remains to be seen). Spock is condemned to kill or be killed by cultural constraints, T’Pring is forced to choose who lives or dies by cultural constraints. She didn’t want to (essentially) murder Spock or Stonn, so she chose a stranger. This becomes even more obvious if you read deleted elements of the original Amok Time script!

T’Pring is gonna be in three episodes, I really doubt that’s going to be exclusively composed of romantic moments between her and Spock (if there are any). I expect character depth for both her and Spock. I think it’s super unfair to complain about something we haven’t seen play out. Even if that subplot sucks ass, it doesn’t rule out Spock being queer or negate/sabotage Spirk in any way! It doesn’t erase Spock’s journey being very allegorical for being queer either. Just because he’s not the same kind of queer you headcanon him to be, it doesn’t erase that element of his identity, canon or fanon!

If Spock being at least mildly interested in women occasionally ruins Spock as a character and a show that isn’t even out yet for you. Maybe you should reevaluate why you liked him in the first place.

[freakadr0id]

OFMD and My Experience With Queerbait and Fandoms

I don’t think I can emphasize just how cathartic Our Flag Means Death is for me and my relationship with queer media and fandom space in general. It has made me grow optimistic for the state of queer television, and reminded me why fandom spaces are so important for the queer community online.

BTW this is a VERY long (seriously it’s too fucking long), kind of trauma dumpy post. If that’s not your jam, just skip over this. I don’t often do this sort of word vomity personal post, but OFMD has been stuck in my brain for a solid week and I have a lot of feelings when it comes to this show. There will be TL;DR at the end, but if you end up reading it, I have a feeling quite a few people will relate to my experience. I’ve bolded the elements that I think are most important in this mess of a thought dump.

Just like so many queer people, I have been burned again and again by shows, books and movies who have hinted at the promise of representation yet continuously end up disappointed. The presence of fanfiction and fandoms were a solace for me for many years, as I explored the subtext and queer themes that many shows have to offer, even if the representation wasn’t really there. However, one show ruined all this for me, and I began to resent most television shows and their fandoms, excluding animation (I’ll get to that in a bit).

Let me take you back in time to late 2018. I’ve just discovered this show called The Magicians (you might have heard about it) and I have fallen hard into the fandom. More so than I’ve ever done before. Not only am I consuming all I can surrounding the show and the books, but it’s also the most active I’ve ever been in a fandom (it was the first fandom Discord I ever joined). I talked to people in the fandom, felt like I was truly a part of the community, and even started setting up a rewatch of the show when it went on hiatus between seasons 4 and 5.

Then The Magicians season 4 came out, and it all came crashing down. They had killed their bisexual main character in the worst way possible, and every bit of queer rep the show had built up was all but destroyed. So many people struggled after that finale, heartbroken and upset at how they handled Quentin’s death. My mental health was in a terrible state at the time, so seeing Quentin, a character I so strongly related to, die the way he did was devastating to me. The fandom was shattered, and this little community I deeply loved became a source of pain to me. I never saw season 5 (I only read synopses) or watched the show ever again. Not even fanfiction could help me through this and I left the fandom entirely. I abandoned the rewatch project I helped set up, and I stopped talking to the people I met through it. Although I think it was best for my mental health at the time, this is something I still regret.

The Magicians was the final straw when it came to queerbait. It left more than a bad taste in my mouth - I lost interest in live action shows almost entirely, since most of my experience with queerbait came from that medium. There have only been two live action shows I’ve really watched since The Magicians: Hannibal and Good Omens, two shows that I knew going in were accepted by the queer community for their representation. The rest have been animated shows, which have been pushing the boundaries of queer rep in television over the last decade.

Fandoms were still a place I dreaded, since so many of them are full of antis, ship discourse, and bad takes (the animation community has some fucking AWFUL takes on shows and the industry). There were a few I continued to follow, but they were for things that have long since ended. Ongoing fandoms are strictly off limits.

I’ve learned an important lesson from The Magicians: most queer ships are never going to happen. I see so many fandoms hype up certain ships, swearing it’s going to be endgame (TJLC style, although not quite to that degree), yet I know most of them will end up only upset and disappointed. Why bother with an ongoing fandom, if I knew that any potential ship in the show wasn’t going to happen.

When I saw OFMD trending on Tumblr two weeks ago and I saw all the excitement surrounding it, I decided to give it a chance, and I loved it. To be fair, the first three episodes were rough for me (I get secondhand embarrassment really easily), but by episode eight, I saw what this show was doing. This was the show I had been waiting for – that we all were waiting for. I still had my doubts when it came to Stede/Ed, even with everything David and the cast were saying, but I finally had hope.

A kiss between Ed and Stede was something I simultaneously knew would happen, but never thought would exist. When we got the kiss in episode 9, I was overwhelmed with excitement, surprise, and most importantly, relief. For once we weren’t being lied to and the subtext became text. This isn’t some final episode conclusion that ensures straight people and homophobes continue watching the show throughout, but a first season promise that more is to come. The feelings we had upon seeing the kiss is something we should have been experiencing this whole time. It has been a long-fought battle to get to this point, and hoo boy does it feel good.

You would think that the excellent queer rep that this show provides would make me more resentful of the shows that failed in doing so, but I’m not. If anything, I’m more at peace with how those shows made me feel. For a long time, I hated what those shows did, since those shows were our chance to see finally ourselves on mainstream tv (let’s face it, Hannibal is a niche show). Time and time again we were denied that chance. Now, we have this show. We finally have a queer show that appeals to a wide range of people, straights included. I can accept my disappointment in shows like The Magicians now that there is better queer content to enjoy. It is just another broken steppingstone on the path it has taken to get here.

I’ve never been in a fandom this early on, and it has been a joy to see it grow. People are celebrating the show and the community surrounding it has been incredibly supportive of each other. I joined a OFMD Discord, the first one since The Magicians, and the people I have talked to on there have been absolutely wonderful. Of course, there has been a bit of discourse in the fandom (I think the kiss was excellent and the awkwardness of it was entirely in line with Ed and Stede’s character arc), but overall, I have seen nothing but amazing, talented people sharing their love for this show in their art and writing. I have people I can enjoy the show with, even if I don’t irl, and I am reminded why I enjoyed fandom spaces to begin with.

Has my faith in television and fandoms been totally restored? No, and it likely never will. We will get queerbaited by other shows in the future, and fandoms will always be a somewhat problematic culture. However, I believe that this show will set an example for queer media, setting a standard for what it can look like in the future and how creator honesty and fan expectations can improve in fandom spaces.

TL;DR: The Magicians ruined everything I loved about live action television and fandoms as a whole. I hated the constant queerbait and toxic fan culture that surrounded many of these shows and removed myself from them as a result. OFMD and its excellent queer rep (and lack of queerbait) has improved my outlook on live action television and fandom cultures, and helped me accept the pain I felt from past shows that failed in executing, or straight up lied about their queer rep.

[dgcatanisiri]

So... something kinda hit me abruptly and pushed me to feeling about ready to snap, so... Have a word vomit. Kinda feels like a greatest hits compilation of  my “another angry queer rant” tag, but I need to get it out, so...

I know I’ve been over plenty about how I don’t feel represented even when I have something with gay representation. How I’d give dozens of Dorians and Iron Bulls to get even one run of Inquisition that properly has my male Inquisitor romance Cullen. How when I look at Mass Effect - this franchise that I love - I can only see how much it hates me for being a gay man who dares to seek content for me. How godawful it is that Gil’s story, a story that is explicitly a story centered on a gay man and the difficulties he faces BECAUSE of being gay, was written by a straight person who ABSOLUTELY does not GET. IT. And how fandom as an entity sucks, because so often it feels like the attitude of the people in it comes across as telling me that my desire to be represented in my media somehow comes in second to celebrating the advances solely for women, that my needs as a queer MAN (the emphasis usually theirs) are less important, because I can still see myself AS A MAN in other characters throughout media.

But... That doesn’t change the fact that this is a very real, very tangible THING for me to grapple with. And sometimes it feels like no one ever, EVER talks about this.

I mean, my go-to example is that after Inquisition dropped, you could not say A WORD in criticism of Dorian without people jumping down your throat, chomping at the bit to call you a homophobe for it. No matter what reason - but ESPECIALLY if you thought he was “too stereotypical” - you got hit with that label. Even if you were gay yourself, it was just your “internalized homophobia” that made you dislike him, or even being biased against the people who genuinely do lean in to the stereotypes, don’t they deserve representation too?!

Well, yeah. It’s not like I was saying they don’t. But that it’s a stereotype means it’s often still in media, still often THERE. It’s not always good representation, but it’s something. Meanwhile for those of us who AREN’T? It just meant further exclusion from the narratives. A continuation of our invisibility.

And sure, one queer character cannot represent every queer person, one individual who embodies one letter of the alphabet soup cannot be everything to everyone under that individual label. But, again, it still means that I don’t get to see myself.

If media representation is a life preserver, then I’m getting pulled out to sea while the lifeguards are busy with people who are closer to them than I am. Which, you can call it triage, cast the widest net to hope to get the most people, but when you’re one of those who are not even able to grab on to the net and use it to pull yourself closer, it’s not helping. And, because they’re focused on those who have grabbed on to the net, your struggle continues to be ignored.

Worse, sometimes they aren’t factoring you in the net they’re throwing (yes, I’m aware my metaphor is getting increasingly strained, just work with me here) because they think you’re not in the trouble they think others are - if you can “pass” as cishet, if you can exist without actively fearing for your safety, if you are the kind of person who can walk down the street and not expect to be harassed because you “present” gay, then you’re not as in need as those people who can’t, who are going to be threatened for existing while visibly queer.

But the truth is that you’re still suffering. I’m not gonna get in to the whole oppression Olympics nature of it all, but there is an element that those of us who “pass” as being “straight-acting” (and, for the record, I think these terms are bogus and bullshit, but I’m using them for the sake of simplicity in getting my message across, because I’m stream of consciousnessing this post instead of going to bed so you’re getting babble and word vomit so that this isn’t playing on a loop as I try and sleep) suffer that... I’m not going to say that it makes it worse, but it does have this level of SOMETHING that is a unique pain that you aren’t going to find from the people who are visibly and noticeably queer at a glance - it’s not just isolation, because this is something that you end up not talking about because no one around you realizes that you are queer, but also this voice in the back of your mind that starts questioning “are you REALLY queer? Are you queer ENOUGH?”

And that’s why it hurts that little bit more, is that much more a twist of the knife, when I see these people who push the “joke” of like “why did they even HAVE male Shepard?” or “the only way to play is as Kassandra.” Because it does reinforce this idea - that there is this attitude of this thing, this character that I was seeing as representation doesn’t matter. So that I take strength in that character, well, that’s just me latching on to REPRESENTATION AS A MAN, and we’re not here to protect your fragile masculine ego.

When all I’m looking for is a queer man like I am.

And sometimes, I don’t even feel like the other queer men I can look to get it. Like, there was that time about a year ago that I looked up issues of queer men in video games, and the three videos I found all got an “...and NOPE!” reaction from me - the first argued in math about how “queer people are a small portion of the population, we can’t realistically expect to be represented equally,” even though we’re talking about FICTION, which is, by definition, NOT reality, the second was clearly a cishet who compared not being represented as a queer person to not being represented as a Swedish person, and then a third who first had a thumbnail on a video of “good and bad representation” and Kaidan was the example of bad (so a negative mark against this video to begin with, but I was desperate), only to lead with Dorian as a good example, which... *vague motion above and at the “dorian critical” tag* I staunchly disagree with this stance.

Like... I have to struggle to think of who my role models in being a queer man are. It’s not just who fits my story, but who do I look up to, who inspires me. And, admittedly, the luster for any personal hero seems to inevitable wear off at this point, I’m in my early thirties, and most of the media I consume will have characters who are my age or younger PERIOD, so my queer heroes would have to be people I’d consider either peers or even someone who I am older than...

But then, that’s kinda the thing about being queer period - we lost a generation to AIDS, and for those who followed that generation, we’ve had to live in this world where our heroes don’t exist like us, while trying to pave the way for those who come after us, and who can’t conceive of what it is like to age - as in “go from adulthood to middle age to elder,” not just the matter of growing up from childhood to adulthood - and so even as they’re the one who we want to give all of this to... It still means we suffer because no one is there to offer US that hand.

And yet, try to explain this to media creators, and you get ignored or even shut down. Like, I about a year ago, I directly replied to tweet from Patrick Weekes, explaining how Inquisition failed me, how all bi LIs actually HELP me feel more represented as a queer person than the mix of sexualities that BioWare on the whole has said that they intend to do (re: the difference of LIs in DA2 and Dragon Age Inquisition). It got no response, not even a like to indicate that it’d been read by them. I could form in my head the response I’d have inevitably gotten from David Gaider when he still had an active Tumblr of what would amount to, nicest, “we cannot please everyone, enough people were moved by Dorian’s story to make it worthwhile, sorry.” Given some of my cynicism, I can’t help but believe that it would also have come with a “sorry you feel that way.” Particularly considering some of the comments he’s made about Cullen and Kaidan as LIs, both of whom being characters I connect to more than others in their respective games...

And like... Gaider is a gay man. Weekes is nonbinary. But they are from that generation who view being able to exist openly as queer as a revolutionary statement, which... It’s a statement I want to make, sure, but it’s not a revolutionary one to me - “existence” is the bare minimum. To me, focusing on existence as a queer person is to say that the queer character must justify existing as queer in order to be a part of the narrative. But what is revolutionary to me is to give the queer person a story in the narrative that has NOTHING to do with their queerness.

Like... Fantasy world here, Inquisition drops with Cullen and Cassandra as same-sex exclusive LIs, while every other aspect of their stories are the same. Women can’t romance Cullen, Men can’t romance Cassandra. Other than that, we have Cullen with his addiction/redemption arc and Cassandra not just struggling with her faith but even getting the chance to be Divine. Yes, fandom would FLIP. THE FUCK. OUT. But here’s what it says - the things that these characters go through in the course of the game are not defined by their sexuality. Hell, with these characters specifically, you get characters with MASSIVE relevance to queer stories that AREN’T exclusive to being queer - addiction is a real issue in queer communities, given how many of our safe spaces are bars or clubs, places where alcohol (and thus alcohol abuse) is easily obtained, and, by extension, drugs as well. Meanwhile, there are SCORES of queer people who struggle with the question of faith in the wake of their queerness manifesting.

THAT is revolutionary. To take these stories that straight people get all the time, that certainly have meaning as queer stories for the queer audience... And yet, when they go to these (hypothetically) queer characters, it has that subtext without making the story ABOUT their queerness, while still making it clear that, in this version of things, they are queer - players couldn’t pretend that it’s only in some parallel universe that they are queer, they would only be attracted to the same sex PC. THAT is revolutionary.

Or, y’know, take it back beyond BioWare for a little bit here - all the characters I feel the most connection to emotionally in TV shows are straight. All these men who are my role models only ever get shown being involved with women. At most, they’ll get queerbaited as MAYBE being queer, if you just keep watching! Inevitably, of course, they are not queer by the end of the show - the closest to date is the debacle that is Supernatural.

Yeah, there’s representation for ya.

And then there are those who end up looking at what I see as thoroughly inadequate and... They’re happy. They praise it. They look at this thing that hurts me, that excludes me, that can, when I’m in the bad headspaces, even make me question myself... And they have found something they like with it.

Which, for the record, good for them, genuinely and sincerely, I really am glad that someone is getting something out of this, but... Well, see above: life preserver, isolation, “sorry you feel that way.” Everyone else is getting what they needed, but what about me? When does my representation get to appear? Why am I always being left, scrounging for the scraps of the scraps? Why does other peoples’ representation always seem to get shoved to the front of the line, leaving me languishing in the back.

That’s the real thing about all of those lines of “if you don’t like it, go make your own!” At this point, even if I did manage to get something in my to-write folder cleaned up and ready to go, in reality... How am I supposed to feel like anyone other than me WOULD proceed to read it? That the audience would exist? Because... no one seems to care about this audience. Hell, how would I get anyone to publish it if it is only going to appeal to me?

I feel on the margins of the margins, where no one really cares. Hell, even here in my own blog, I feel afraid of backlash - I’ve had the assholes show up in response to like little brief comments that are off-the-cuff rambles, not worded in a way that makes them a full, detailed accounting, and either take them as evidence that I, personally, represent all that is wrong with fandom at large, or that I am a target for their trolling. Because saying that “I find the jokes about male Shepard not mattering to be diminishing of me as a queer person, can we please stop this?” is somehow not just lesbophobic, but VIOLENTLY lesbophobic. Or that saying that I don’t care that bad things happen to a fictional species is somehow advocating for violence against actual women. Or even explicitly calling out BioWare for lovingly lingering the camera on Miranda’s ass is slutshaming her. And of course, there are the assholes who responded to me saying on the BioWare Twitter announcement post for the Legendary Edition that, if it didn’t have a full trilogy male Shepard/Kaidan romance, I wasn’t buying it, and proceeded to a) call me entitled for it (like, read a dictionary, the very fact that I have to call for this content that doesn’t exist in the game proper is the OPPOSITE of entitlement...), b) tell me that I “shouldn’t deny [myself] a great story just because it doesn’t have gay people in it” and c) just generally be homophobic. Even in rolling with it on the basis of “the trolls are gonna show up period if you make it clear that you care about something, especially if you are trying to get representation for some group that is in the minority... It gets exhausting. It can be harmful. It makes it clear that you’re not welcome, even when you’re supposedly united by the fact that you and these people supposedly love the same piece of media.

I mean, among those examples, I’ve given the statements that inspired those responses no tags other than my own organizational tags, but SOMEHOW they find me anyway, so it wouldn’t surprise me if I got accused of like being another White Gay™ with this post, that I simply want to center the conversation wholly on myself at the expense of all other intersections of queerness and other identities or something for saying all of this, even though this is, and it says so from the start, a vent post, which, by definition, is centered on myself because it’s about me and my experiences and emotions. *sigh*

Anyway...

And, y’know, when BioWare actively refuses to even ACKNOWLEDGE that the absence of a full trilogy M/M romance option is a bad thing, it just ends up saying that the trolls are actually the audience they’re willing to court. That Supernatural ending with a brothers only focus that doesn’t even allow Cas to be mentioned other than offhandedly while suppressing ANY kind of emotional fallout to his admission of love says that they don’t care about the queer people who at the very least the actor was trying to be respectful and representative of. That every piece of media that says that to have a queer person in it, their presence must be explained and justified is saying that there needs to be a REASON for queerness, a reason that is not “because people are queer, and queer people come in as many stripes as cishet people, and so media should reflect that spectrum just as much.”

Even when the numbers of queer characters in media goes up, it doesn’t really move the needle. And that’s not even getting to the difficulties when you are any mix-and-match combo under the queer umbrella, or any other identity that intersects to marginalize someone in our society. It just...

Y’know, it doesn’t feel like “it gets better.” Rather it just feels like being stuck in position, just with a changing backdrop. Sure, things look different by the end of the day, but that doesn’t change that you’re not getting anywhere.

[picnic-at-dreaming-rock]

Top 5 New Books of 2020

A round up of the top 5 new books that I have read this year, full 2020 reading list found here

Warning for possible spoilers below the cut.

Please Don’t Hug Me - Kay Kerr

Erin is looking forward to Schoolies, at least she thinks she is. But things are not going to plan. Life is getting messy, and for Erin, who is autistic, that’s a big problem. She’s lost her job at Surf Zone after an incident that clearly was not her fault. Her driving test went badly even though she followed the instructions perfectly. Her boyfriend is not turning out to be the romantic type. And she’s missing her brother, Rudy, who left almost a year ago.

But now that she’s writing letters to him, some things are beginning to make just a tiny bit of sense.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

I cannot stress enough how much I love this book. Growing up as an autistic teen girl, I really lack a lot of representation, both real and fictional, and this books is a huge step forward in remedying that. Written by an autistic woman (yes, this is an #ownvoices novel!), Please Don’t Hug Me shows autism in a new and beautiful light as to what is most commonly shown. Erin is no genius savant that is only autistic when plot relevant or has a lack of social skills used only for comedic relief, but instead a encapsulation of the ordinary and everyday autistic experience of just wanting to get through the day with as little meltdowns as possible while still maintaining your neurotypical facade.

The Dictionary of Lost Words - Pip Williams

In 1901, the word bondmaid was discovered missing from the Oxford English Dictionary. This is the story of the girl who stole it.

Motherless and irrepressibly curious, Esme spends her childhood in the Scriptorium, a garden shed in Oxford where her father and a team of lexicographers are gathering words for the very first Oxford English Dictionary.

Esme’s place is beneath the sorting table, unseen and unheard. One day, she sees a slip containing the word bondmaid flutter to the floor unclaimed. Esme seizes the word and hides  it in an old wooden trunk that belongs to her friend, Lizzie,  a young servant in the big house. Esme begins to collect other words from the Scriptorium that are misplaced, discarded or have been neglected by the dictionary men. They help her make sense of the world.

Over time, Esme realises that some words are considered more important than others, and that words and meanings relating to women’s experiences often go unrecorded. She begins to collect words for another dictionary: The Dictionary of Lost Words.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

One of my favourite parts about this novel is how perfectly it showed both misogyny and classism/elitism, and how they intertwined. Although it is set in the mid/late 19th century and early 20th century, there is this sense of relatability to it that I think I lot of people might be able to recognise. Williams deals with a lot topics that I don’t often see in other media, such as menstruation without fancy allusions or making it into anything other than what it is, pregnancy out-of-wedlock without it being seen as a character flaw on the woman’s part, and showing characters one might consider like a hag or spinster to be good people worth celebrating because of things that deem them lesser rather than despite it or not at all. One main criticism I do have with this book, however, is how it seems like William just adds tragedy for the sake of moving the plot forward/to add shock value or drama. I will admit, it did get me crying at some parts, it did get a little tedious and lack-luster to have the last half of the novel just be death after life-altering event after death after life-altering event. 

The Book Thief - Markus Zusak

It is 1939. Nazi Germany. The country is holding its breath. Death has never been busier, and will be busier still.

By her brother's graveside, Liesel's life is changed when she picks up a single object, partially hidden in the snow. It is The Gravedigger's Handbook, left behind there by accident, and it is her first act of book thievery. So begins a love affair with books and words, as Liesel, with the help of her accordian-playing foster father, learns to read. Soon she is stealing books from Nazi book-burnings, the mayor's wife's library, wherever there are books to be found.

But these are dangerous times. When Liesel's foster family hides a Jew in their basement, Liesel's world is both opened up, and closed down.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

I read this book for my advanced literature class earlier this year and it was a great choice on the schools part. Everyone in my class enjoyed it, even if a lot of us were crying by the end of the novel. The book itself is rich with literary techniques that enrich the actual reading if you are one of those people that like to dissect what they read. I think Zusak made a really good choice with having Death narrate, as well as how he tied in his own experiences/interjections in these mini vignette-type extracts which I found really enhanced both the overall atmosphere and environment. The only qualm I have is that there were a lot of questions left unanswered that made the story feel somewhat empty.

Picnic at Hanging Rock - Joan Lindsay

It was a cloudless summer day in the year nineteen hundred.

Everyone at Appleyard College for Young Ladies agreed it was just right for a picnic at Hanging Rock. After lunch, a group of three of the girls climbed into the blaze of the afternoon sun, pressing on through the scrub into the shadows of Hanging Rock. Further, higher, till at last they disappeared.

They never returned.

Whether Picnic at Hanging Rock is fact or fiction the reader must decide for themselves.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

I watched the Foxtel miniseries first a couple years and thoroughly enjoyed it and sought out the novel very quickly afterwards. I will be honest, I picked the novel up first around 2018/19 and dropped it until earlier this year when I reread/finished it and loved it. Lindsay’s ability to create this perfect and constant juxtaposition between the natural Australian bush and the intruding colonialism is really amazing and adds this interesting aesthetic that the academia community on this site seems to enjoy. There is also a really interesting dynamic between the female characters (which is most of the characters, to be fair) and they feel complete and authentic, something that doesn’t always exist in other works of literature. There is also one canon queer character, but there is so much subtext in the novel for so many other characters that it feels purposeful. All in all, this is the gayest straight book I ever read.  

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Suzanne Collins

It is the morning of the reaping that will kick off the tenth annual Hunger Games. In the Capital, eighteen-year-old Coriolanus Snow is preparing for his one shot at glory as a mentor in the Games. The once-mighty house of Snow has fallen on hard times, its fate hanging on the slender chance that Coriolanus will be able to outcharm, outwit, and outmaneuver his fellow students to mentor the winning tribute.

The odds are against him. He's been given the humiliating assignment of mentoring the female tribute from District 12, the lowest of the low. Their fates are now completely intertwined -- every choice Coriolanus makes could lead to favor or failure, triumph or ruin. Inside the arena, it will be a fight to the death. Outside the arena, Coriolanus starts to feel for his doomed tribute... and must weigh his need to follow the rules against his desire to survive no matter what it takes.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

The Hunger Games was one of the series in primary school that rocked my literary world (joining the ranks of The Great Brain, Harry Potter and The Books of Beginning) and helped inspire my love of reading, and when I heard about a prequel I was over the moon with nostalgia. I found it a couple days after its release at Target for $16 and I loved it. I finished it in about a week and I could barely put it down. I loved reading how the hunger games came to be and how they ended up the way they were, as well as advancing Collins’ previously established and incredible world building. The book also adds upon the themes in the original trilogy of government corruption, classism, elitism, individualism and propaganda, but from those that benefit from it (e.g. Snow) instead of those that suffer (e.g. Katniss). I have seen some criticism from people about not liking it being from Snow’s perspective but I personally think that it was the perfect choice, as no other character’s story would be able to add to the story in such a meaningful way.

[isaacthedruid]

Steven Universe’s Representation and Music: an informal essay

As the first animated Cartoon Network show created entirely by a woman, Steven Universe’s run lasted for five seasons, a movie and a sequel-epilogue series. The show was far from perfect and its fandom wasn’t the best either but there is something so special about a show that followed lesbian space rocks and a young boy saving the world.

More specifically Steven Universe is about a young boy named Steven, who is half-Gem, half-human who protects the town of Beach City from evil. Gems are a kind of alien who take on the form of pastel-coloured women, to better assimilate with the rest of the world.

Rebecca Sugar, the creator, explains her colourful characters in a behind-the-scenes promo:

“I always dreamed of making a show that would have this mix of fantasy and reality. So, I wanted to make these fantasy characters that enjoy being with Steven as much, if not more than they enjoy being fantasy characters. The characters aren’t perfect and that’s what makes them so great.”

Steven’s family are known as the Crystal Gems, a group of rebels who fought against their government thousands of years ago and now live on earth. Steven’s mom, Rose Quartz was at the forefront of the fight, she did extremely terrible things and when she gave up her gem—-so Steven could be born—-she was left unable to form a body ever again. Steven, with only his dad and three alien women, must attempt to fix her messes and deal with the repercussions of his mother’s actions.

One of the main mechanics within the series is known as fusion, in which two or more Gems become a single being who is stronger and more powerful. The fused form takes on the physical, mental and emotional aspects of those who are part of the bond. As mentioned and discussed many times within this blog, fusions are a physical embodiment of different kinds of relationships. And for a show starring a primarily female cast, they do not shy away from using this mechanic to tell queer stories.

So explicitly that in 2018, the show had the first-ever lesbian wedding in a cartoon. Of course, representation wasn’t always as accepted in Steven Universe. Just two years before the big wedding, higher-ups at Cartoon Network told Rebecca Sugar, they not happy with the multiple queer relationships, so much so that they were ready to threaten cancellation.

In an interview with Entertainment Weekly, she expressed:

“If this is going to cost me my show that’s fine because this is a huge injustice and I need to be able to represent myself and my team through this show and anything less would be unfair to my audience.”

Being LGBT herself, identifying as bisexual and non-binary, representation is important to her. For many queer people, especially grown-ups, they hope to see themselves represented in kids’ media today as they never had growing up. They want nothing more for children’s shows to say that being “different” or not fitting in with our heteronormative society is actually normal.

Within Steven Universe, you can find woman-loving-woman relationships, non-binary and intersex characters, woman-loving-non-binary relationships, asexual coded characters and basically every other letter in the acronym.

Rebecca Sugar even acted as the exciting force for LGBT inclusion within Adventure Time, originally working as a writer and storyboard artist before leaving to create her own show. She pushed for making the ex-romantic queer couple to be canonically part of the story and for it to not just coded into the dialogue.

A few years later, she returned to the show, multiple times, to compose over 20 songs that would air over the series 10-year-long run such as, “I’m Just Your Problem” which had lesbian subtext that would be confirmed later.

Some other iconic songs including “Fry Song“, “Remember You“, “Good Little Girl“, “Everything Stays” and even the finale song, “Time Adventure“.

Much like the show as a whole, there is something so special about the music she writes. In total, there were over 160 songs written for the franchise, some being short little tunes, no longer than a minute while others were full-blown musical numbers. No matter, all of them have their place within the show. Often when the character can’t express lines through speech, music is utilized to provide a more raw and poignant portrayal of their emotions.

Why Steven Universe is so widely loved is due to the music, as the overall story is not even close to perfect. Yet, everyone can agree on one thing, the music is unbelievably good. What is interesting is the different styles of melodies and backtracking used in the various songs, even more impressive is that every character has their own instrumental motif.

Steven’s motif is the ukelele as he is often seen playing the instrument himself, performing short little melodies and even writing the in-show version of the theme song. Additionally, Steven’s music uses a large amount of Chiptune synth, electronic music which is created using a programmable sound generator. Both instruments have a very childlike feeling to them, Chiptune especially as it is normally used in video game music like The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, one of the main musical inspirations for the show. As Steven is the lead, most of the music has Chiptune somewhere in the score and fun fact, the first song in the show, sung by Steven, “Cookie Cat” was actually written on an old Gameboy.

Amethyst is very loud and fun, her motif is electric drums which is extremely reflective of her character. As she can be angry from convincing herself that she is not good enough to happy and giggling from pranking Steven, her instrument can be used in so many ways as she is not a simple character. No matter what, for the few songs Amethyst has on her own (or in the score), her drums provide such an interesting emotional response to the situation.

Garnet is a fusion, so her motif is actually the combination of two instruments. Ruby is a drumbeat as she is a fiery and loud character, she is chaotic while Sapphire is her opposite. Sapphire is calm and collected, she has ice-related powers and is represented by Synth music. The characters together have a perfect unity, expressed by Garnet’s synth bass sounds, she is the equilibrium of two very contrasting characters. The music associated with Garnet, uses primarily the synth bass but Ruby and Sapphire’s individual instruments can be heard throughout her music. All three instruments are also heavily representative as Garnet’s main dancing style is Hip Hop which clashing with others’ softer dancing styles.

Despite, not being alive during the show, Rose Quartz still has her own musical motif as she plays a large part in Steven’s growth throughout the series. As well as being in many flashbacks, she is represented with strings, more specifically, the violin. Rose’s story is rather sad which quite is visible within her associated music, yet, she was also an extremely powerful character as she led the fight against the Homeworld government. Her strength can be heard with strong uplifts and swells in the music. She is never seen playing an instrument unlike the rest of the main characters but one person who plays hers is Pearl, a character Rose was possibly in love with.

For the complex and beautiful character, Pearl, her motif is classical and swing piano. She is visually represented as a ballerina for a large majority of the series, dressed in a leotard, a small skirt and ballet shoes. Apart from Garnet, she is one of the calmest characters in the show. She is a perfectionist and is knowledgeable on many topics. She has a dark past and her fair share of trauma, all of this is wrapped up in her music. From her traumatic past with Rose Quartz, the violin had been heard throughout her music, yet, when she finally dealt with everything, the violin was lost. Swapped out for a new instrument, a bass guitar which she learned how to play at the end of the series. Pearl is a character who has been through a lot and her music reflects it. As she grew, her music changed with her, becoming her own instead of something built off of Rose’s.

My personal favourite song is “It’s Over Isn’t It?” which is this heartwrenching and emotionally painful ballad sung by a broken woman. Pearl was in love with Steven’s mom. Yet, the feelings were not mutual or at least ended being reciprocated as Rose left her for Greg, Steven’s dad. It hurts because Rose didn’t just leave her, Rose Quartz also passed away. As the song goes:

That they didn’t really matter until you I was fine when you came And we fought like it was all some silly game Over her, who she’d choose After all those years, I never thought I’d lose … You won and she chose you and she loved you and she’s gone It’s over, isn’t it? Why can’t I move on? … Who am I now in this world without her? Petty and dull with the nerve to doubt her What does it matter? It’s already done Now I’ve got to be there for her son

Without Rose, Pearl has lost her place in the world as all she ever knew was her. Yet, now she is left to help raise a half-human baby and go on with her life. It makes it more difficult as this baby is the product of Rose and the man that she left Pearl for.

Pearl doesn’t want to hate Greg, she is angry at him but she doesn’t have hatred towards him. They may not be the best of pals at the start of the series but in the song called “Both of You“ has Steven, finally, begging for Greg and Pearl to just talk to each other.

Why don’t you talk to each other? Why don’t you talk to each other? Just give it a try Why don’t you talk about what happened? … You might not believe it but you got a lot in common, you really do You both love me and I love both of you … I know you both need it Someone who knows what you’re going through

An interesting thing about this song is that Steven is this to them, the person with Rose’s gem is singing to the two people who fought over Rose. It makes me wonder if this could be Rose speaking through Steven to her two loved ones. Whether it is or not, doesn’t really matter to the overall story but it is a fun idea to look at.

Overall, these songs are a literal representation of dealing with ones’ emotions in a healthy way, something that Steven Universe actively tries to teach their younger viewers about.

To say Steven Universe is a good show only for its music would be a false statement, it’s one of the strongest aspects but without the story or the characters, the music would fall flat and not have any of its passion.

[yikes-strikes-again]

my thoughts on “Ho Yay“

i want to talk about something that’s been bothering me about TvTropes. i love this site; it is an incredibly expansive resource for understanding common tropes in western media and developing a framework for critical analysis. what i’m going to explain requires some background if you’re not already familiar with TvTropes. to try and be brief, there are two main types of pages on the site (three if you count indexes, but they aren’t relevant right now):

trope pages. these are pages that explain a common literary device or concept and then provide examples of its use in media. basically the backbone of the site.

media pages. these pages introduce the reader to a piece of media and list various tropes that it uses along with explanations of their appearances. media pages also contain links to YMMV sub-pages at the top of the page (important): these pages are extensions of a work’s YMMV (”Your Mileage May Vary”) sub-page, which every work has as a place for subjective interpretations written by tropers, site users with the ability to edit and add to pages. when a trope on the YMMV page of a work has too many examples, it often becomes its own YMMV sub-page. the specific sub-pages a work has depend on its popularity as well as its content.

i wanted to talk about a particular kind of YMMV trope that commonly appears as its own sub-page on media pages: Ho Yay. Ho Yay is a category that refers to aspects of a work that fans interpret as gay subtext. it’s generally agreed upon that for something to qualify as Ho Yay, the relationship can’t be canonically romantic. in many cases, the gay subtext was not intended by the creators.

it’s not hard to understand why this trope exists. when positive queer representation was so taboo as to be unheard of, the only gay subtext was fan-interpreted subtext. people only had the same-gender platonic relationships they found in television and books to see themselves in. and that’s what Ho Yay was: queer interpretations of the same-gender friendships in media that gave them a new, personal significance.

on TvTropes, Ho Yay appears as a YMMV page on, basically, any media page of a popular work that features close same-gender friendships. which is... a lot of them, to say the least. there’s got to be, collectively, hundreds of thousands of words solely about gay subtext on this site. and that’s a really good thing, I think, especially for old works with decades of gay fan interpretations, like Star Trek. for many people, it’s a very important aspect of their enjoyment of the work, and it deserves documentation.

however, after years of lurking on TvTropes, and reading Ho Yay pages in particular, something began to irk at me. something I’d seen glimpses of in the wording of certain entries. and, slowly, it began to bother me more and more, until i finally decided it was worth addressing.

you see, there’s something about the concept of having an entire page dedicated to speculation on potential gay subtext in a work, to the exclusion of all other relationship subtext. understand that Ho Yay pages are not places to discuss headcanons regarding a character’s gender or sexuality, or the nature of any relationships they might have with other characters, regardless of gender. it exists to point out romantic subtext only, and i mean only, if it’s gay.

this... bothers me somewhat.

i’d be sooooo much more comfortable if there was also a type of YMMV page that existed for people to talk about all non-canon romantic subtext, or just romantic subtext in general, without characters’ genders being a factor. because, honestly, it feels incredibly othering to have a page dedicated to fan speculation on the potential gayness of something at the exclusion of all other types of relationships. as if being gay is exotic and inherently worthy of note. that’s such an icky sentiment to me, and i can’t ever shake it when i read Ho Yay pages now. and i’m not even getting into all the examples of Ho Yay that are about real people, that’s disgusting for an entirely different set of reasons

i want to emphasize that i don’t want to get rid of Ho Yay; as stated above, i think it’s incredibly important to document the literal decades of fan speculation on the queerness of canonically straight characters. but to have gay subtext be the only kind treated with this amount of attention seriously rubs me the wrong way. if our goal is the equal treatment of all types of relationships, then it should start with us not granting this exceptional quality to gayness and just make a page for all relationship subtext!

you know, maybe what Ho Yay has become is just a symptom of a much larger problem: fandom treating gay relationships as inherently different and special. if that’s the case, i’d like everyone reading to take a moment to examine their biases.

my point to all of this is that, unlike in Ho Yay’s heyday, it’s rare, but not unheard of to see canon queer relationships of all kinds. even though there’s still a long way to go in that department, i think it's time to let go of the need to use a YMMV trope whose historical necessity has been, in many places, rendered obsolete.* the needs of fandom are changing. we don’t just want representation, we want our existence to be treated as mundane, and that means unexceptional. 

Society Marches On.

~~~

*in some places, homophobia is much more pervasive and queer representation is even farther than where it should be than in my country. I’m from the U.S., so if my sweeping statements don’t apply to your culture, please feel free to disregard them.

[aroaessidhe]

Hello fellow book fanartists! I had some thoughts the other day, along the lines of: 

I wish there was more fanart for xyz diverse/queer books!

There must be more artists that consistently do fanart for books that don’t have much/any fanart, but I can only think of a handful….

I should organise a zine specifically for fanart of diverse books that don’t have any fanart!

I have never even been in a zine, let alone organised one…..maybe not….

Anyway, I don’t think a zine is the way to start but…..something? a hashtag? a monthly challenge thing? A twitter/tumblr account to reblog stuff?  Even just finding more fanartists I don’t know about would be cool tbh! (this applies more to twitter/instagram, rather than tumblr where it’s somewhat easier to check tags)  If designers, people who make edits, bloggers, fic writers, wanted to get in on this somehow i’d be into that too!!

Whatever it is, I’d want it to focus on books where the main character/s are canonically queer, trans, poc, not just major side characters or subtext. Also books by ownvoices/marginalised authors - I do notice that the most popular m/m books that have a lot of fanart are ones written by white women, rather than ownvoices m/m books (especially those by poc), for example . (I’m not hating on people who do fanart for those books either - just pointing it out!)

Actually, I drafted this post ages ago and have just been too busy to do anything with it, but I decided to make a twitter (currently @diversebookart) for retweeting art on there - so that exists, at the very least! Keen for other things to happen if other people are keen to, though! (and if you post your book fanart on twitter please @ it to me so I can rt it!)

I’ve also definitely noticed in the last couple years that tumblr isn’t the best place for book fanart unless it’s got a pretty big fandom - which is generally not the books I’m talking about here. And on twitter and stuff, it’s rarely tagged and gets lost after a few days. I definitely understand having more motivation to do art of more popular things, especially for those of us who are freelancing (and getting more attention on social media can be really important for), but maybe a hashtag could help that stuff not get like, seen by the author + a handful of people and then nothing after a week. idk. Basically I want to do something that a) creates more fanart for books that don’t have it and b) boosts artists work when we make it! No like, obligation to do certain art of certain things

I’m posting this here because I don’t have any other blog for this sort of thing, but I’ll definitely talk about it on twitter (@layahimalaya and @aroaessidhe are my art and fandom accounts, but also @diversebookart since I’ve made that now) 

Anyway!!! This is just some thoughts, but if anyone else has some thoughts, let me know???? I could make a group chat on twitter, or maybe a discord server, if people are into that. I tagged a bunch of people off the top of my head (& also looking through art i’ve rebblogged) who either have done book fanart of some books with barely any fanart, or some people who do fanart of more popular but still diverse books. Some people who only do like 5% book fanart, too. Feel free to ignore this if you want and also tell me if I missed anyone obvious!!!

EDIT: I also made a discord, which is here, and a tumblr: @diversebookfanart

@nellasbookplanet @ace-artemis-fanartist @may12324 @yabookportraits @lesyablackbird @phantomrin @ghostbeeish @caitabellart @monolime@vinnie-cha @linovadraws @gibbarts @aymmidumps @emieclat @vulpyx @tonftyhw @itsiparwing @benevolenterrancy @rowatree @taratjah @oblivionsdream  @moonlit-sketches  @alexisc-art @hyperhs @drisrt @whitefire17draws

[norahastuff]

At this point , I am really scared , I need some reassurance that Destiel will happen , so many posts saying that it is unlikely , please help!! :(

Ok first of all, I get it. These days I’m relatively chill about most aspects of the show, just taking things as they come and trying to enjoy the story they’re telling - it’s still a pretty good one - but I have those moments too. For example my knee jerk reaction to the “Cas has failed his brothers” tweet  (which again means nothing - people that run the CW social media accounts know next to nothing about what’s going on in the show) was genuinely “I can’t believe Dean made Cas a mixtape of the music his parents fell in love over, in a scene that was shot so romantically, and people are still out here calling them brothers.”

And honestly that’s still where I’m stuck with all of this. I haven’t been in fandom long. I never even really knew what shipping was until last year. I was watching, enjoying and analysing the show (albeit in my own head), long before I found tumblr, and had thought it was blindingly obvious that there were romantic elements to Dean and Cas’ relationship. I think that’s something a lot of us forget when we’re talking about “Canon Destiel” and what will happen etc. We discount everything that has already happened between them in favour of some proof down the road. Which I get, trust me, but I really don’t think we should forget everything that led us to see Dean and Cas this way to begin with.

Ok so what helps me mostly be chill about all this?

1) The wealth of canon material that already exists between them (mixtapes, grief arcs, human weakness, colette parallels, sweeping reunions set to rousing musical cues, Amara supposedly having control over Dean but when in a room with her and Cas all Dean can do is call out Cas’ name over and over again in a broken voice - I honestly could go on all day.)

2) I don’t believe any of this was being done in bad faith.

I’m going to focus on 3 of the current writers, 2 of whom are openly queer and one of whom is the showrunner:

Berens

His first episode 9x06 was the one where Misha was instructed to play Cas as a “jilted lover” by Carver, the showrunner, and that episode was just romantic af. There’s so much staring through wistfully at each other it’s ridiculous. If you watch Berens episodes, it’s pretty clear that he considers Dean and Cas’ relationship vital, he often makes a point to place them in the same tier of importance as Sam and Dean’s relationship, and on top of that it seems to me he’s always just contextualised their relationship as having romantic elements. Whether it’s Colette parallels or mixtapes, Bobo’s always presented them a certain way.

Yockey

If you even glance at Yockey’s resume you’ll be able to see he’s a genius playwright whose work tends to focus on gay relationship dramas. Of course that in no way means that any relationship between two men that he writes has to be romantic, but what it does mean is that he understands when it is. It does mean that when he writes an episode like 12x10 (an ep about angels falling in love with humans), where Dean and Cas are bickering like a married couple and Ishim dubs the woman he was in love with his human weakness, whilst in the same breath calling Dean Cas’ human weakness, he’s doing it intentionally. That episode was a lot of things, well written, smart, beautifully crafted - but one thing it was not was subtle. Claiming Yockey didn’t mean it that way seems pretty absurd to me, and honestly, trying to claim Yockey - a gay man who writes nuanced LGBT+ stories - meant it as bait or whatever, is even worse. I mean that episode even had an exploration of how angels do not have genders like humans do by showing Cas in a female vessel and having him reiterate that angels are their own thing, regardless of whether they are in a male or female vessel at any given time.

That’s not even mentioning 13x05 and how ridiculously romantic that ep was. I mean I can’t - that final scene was ridiculous.

Andrew Dabb

And then we come to the showrunner himself. Dabb joined the show the same season that Cas did. He’s always placed a great deal of importance on Dean and Cas’ relationship, and always made sure to differentiate it from Sam and Cas. Even as early as 5x16, he made sure to emphasise how it was Dean who felt for Cas when he lost his faith in God (note: I don’t think there was any romantic intent there at the time but he was showing the depth and importance of their bond even back then.) 8x08 with the “talk to me” and the heart breaking conversation that followed that was cut short when Sam walked in. Dabb cares.

Dabb has also clearly been intrigued with the potentially romantic aspects of their relationship. I don’t know what his intentions have ever been with it, but at the very least, he has often seemed like he wanted to explore it. In 9x22 where Metatron delivers the “he’s in love with..,humanity” line, Dabb reportedly wrote that Metatron created Cas’ heaven as having tons of photos of naked Dean (which allegedly was axed by a higher up). His era led to Cas being given a vital, central role in the show and story like he’d never had before and also the escalation of the Dean/Cas romantic story like never before. In Dabb’s eps all of heaven and hell assume they’re banging with a demon even saying it to Cas’ face. Not to mention 12x23. Just all of it. Seriously.

I have no idea what TPTB intentions are, or ever have been, with Destiel as an eventual textual development, and yes I definitely believe that the right thing to do is for them to address it in some way. But I will say it bothers me a little when people throw it into the same category as a couple of other shows that shall not be named for the very important reason that the show has never invalidated any of the romantic elements of this relationship they’ve crafted between Dean and Cas, at least not post s8 and certainly not since Dabb took over around mid s11.

Kripke and Gamble definitely had a different approach that was pretty much just homoerotic subtext with the occasional (extremely on the nose) gay joke thrown in, but that’s not something Carver and Dabb did. However explicit they did/will get with it, every development between Dean and Cas has been anchored by serious emotional importance and nothing about their bond has ever been dismissed or downplayed as unimportant.

If there’s one thing I’m reasonably confident about is that that isn’t going to change. They’re not going to invalidate or “no homo” any of this by throwing Dean or Cas a last minute love interest. There’s a lot simmering under the surface between Dean and Cas right now, has been for a while now, and it’s definitely something they’re going to address if they’re going to give any kind of sensical end to their story.

Regardless of how explicit it winds up being - and again I want to reiterate, I do understand people’s pain and frustration if it winds up not being especially overt - this is a story that the people who created it cared about. The writers have treated in seriously and none of them ever mocked or dismissed any of the fans and are not evil villains cackling over a cauldron because they’ve tricked so many people with this story. Also, because I’ve been seeing some baffling commentary about intent - some from former Destiel shippers even - even if there isn’t a clear cut romantic endgame that makes it obvious to 100% of the GA, none of that invalidates all the romantic storytelling that has been, and continues to be, a part of the narrative for a long time now. It exists. To quote Misha “you are not crazy.” And don’t let anyone make you believe that you are.

TLDR: I have no idea what’s coming next and I’m sorry but I can’t give you any assurance that things are going to be wrapped up the way you or I would want them to be, but I can give you my long rambling thoughts about why I feel the way I do. Why it can still bug me that we can watch a story that if it was between a man and a woman would be blindingly clear to everyone but if it’s m/m (or even w/w) has constant denials levelled against it, but how at the same time I’m not constantly filled with rage or sadness about why it has played out the way it has.

So yeah, that’s how I’m going into the final season. There’s a lot more I wanted to say but looking at this wall of text I’m realising I’ve already gone on for far too long so I’ll stop now.