#putting the word ‘core’ at the end of anything to be really funny

[boysnberriespie]

There’s always something off putting about new internet memes and language* becoming serious discourse with real analysis (fine and normal, academics do it all the time) but people with no media literacy read those posts/essays and think that means anybody who says those things is brainwashed sheep. They’ve been analyzed and therefore there is something significantly wrong with them.

Can we not do neutral analysis anymore? Can nothing be interesting for its own sake? Must we be the arbiters of cultural value based on the next new substack essay and how we felt about it?

*not including the misuse appropriation of AAVE which is not what I’m thinking about in this moment, and while a connected discussion, isn’t necessarily the same thing as people coming up with corecore or even something like blorbo

[ja3mln]

part one & three

cw: popular guy!jm, jealous!jm, smut, public sex, exhibitionism, fingering, cum eating (f), dirty talk, slutshaming, a bit of fluff, jm is whipped for reader

words: 1.5k

a/n: wanted to write a second part since yall liked the first one! thinking abt writing a third one with fluff only but idk😖 enjoy!

_____________________________________________

jaemin definitely has a crush on you. he doesn't know how it happens but one thing he knows, it's that it's driving him crazy. of course, he crushed on girls before but one of his hook ups? never. he couldn't help but start acting differently towards you once he realized that his feelings for you start growing. he would walk you home after classes when he have the occasion to (and will end up fucking you in your apartment), he would make sure to send you a text to ask you if you ate today because he knows that you sometimes skip meals to go to the library and study, he even starts sending you good morning texts and good night texts. for you, it was just him being friendly because after all, spending time with jaemin besides the sex was nice.

today jaemin was throwing a party and the first thing he did was invite you. he found himself excitedly looking for you in the crowded rooms but when he finally spotted you, he didn't except for you to be with a random guy, probably a date because of the way you were laughing and touching his arm. he tried so hard to fight the jealousy that was filling his body. it's not like you both are exclusive, or officially together. you were just fucking, having friendly dates from time to time, just what friends with benefits normally do. then why jaemin was feeling so angry seeing you with another guy? he literally have all the girls at his feet but he wanted you more than anything. the first thought that came to his mind was that he wanted to grab you and fuck you in front of this guy. show him that only his cock can make you feel good. he quickly told himself to get his shit together and just joined his group of friends. he couldn't ignore the uncomfortable feeling in his chest, he really tried but he couldn't even have a conversation because he was too distracted, just the thought of you having fun with another guy won't leave his mind. he just couldn't take it anymore. once you were finally alone, he didn't hesitate to approach you.

"oh, hey jaemin!", just seeing your soft smile made jaemin's heart skipped a beat. he was just so whipped for you. "who's that guy?", he says with a monotone voice because he didn't want to sound too harsh. "my date...?" you reply a bit surprised by his question and mostly the dark look in his eyes. he gets closer to you, and your back end up on the wall as you look up at him. "i don't like that.", jaemin says with an hesitant voice, like he's scared that you'll never want to see him ever again if he reacts that way. in fact, you like the fact that jaemin is jealous. it's not like you didn't develop a small crush for him, it was too hard not to when jaemin was this caring and funny (and also a really good fuck). "you do?", a smirk appears on your lips and jaemin try to not show how surprised and relieved he is. maybe it was the few drunks that you had that made you so confident. one of his hands slides behind your neck so he can get a closer look at your face. "you know that i'm the only one who can make you feel good." and that was true. you never had better than him but it was hard to admit it. jaemin doesn't wait for an answer, pulling you close so he can put his lips on yours.

that's how you both start making out in the corner of the crowded room. you totally forgot about your date, your attention was now completely on jaemin. his grip on your neck gets tighter and his body gets closer to you until you can feel his growing boner on your core. you could already feel yourself getting wet. "should we give him a show, sweetheart ? show him who you belong to.", your heart skips a beat because of how possessive jaemin was getting. he waits for your approval because, of course, he won't do anything you don't want to. you never really had public sex, in front of people even if you both like fucking in public places. as soon as you nod, his lips found yours to share a messy kiss, full of desire for each other. one of his hands starts caressing your tights, dangerously getting closer to your pussy. jaemin breaks the kiss to put his lips on your neck, sucking on it to leave marks while his hand starts ghosting your clit through your panties. "fuck, you're already so wet... you such a dirty slut. you love the attention don't you?", he whispers while looking at you deeply in the eyes and you suddenly feel shy, your cheeks heating up and not finding the words to answer. jaemin feels his heart soften for a moment, he just couldn't fight the way you make him feel. he chuckles slightly before pulling your panties to the side, his lips going back to your neck. you look around you for a second, seeing some of the people looking at you but when your eyes fall on your date who's watching you with a confuse look, you feel your cheeks getting warmer. he just went to grab a drink for you and now you're here, making out with another guy. it's not just a random guy it's jaemin but still, you feel a bit ashame and try to look at him with sorry eyes but when you feel jaemin's fingers slide in your pussy, your eyes shut down and your mouth open to let a soft moan, making jaemin smirk against your neck and his mouth travels your neck to go to your ear. "he's looking right? poor guy. you didn't even hesitate to offer your pussy to me, what a shame", he whispers and not only his words but also his hot breath against your skin makes your pussy throbs. his fingers starts moving in you and he grabs your face with his free hand, forcing you to keep your head straight and your eyes open, "i want you to look at him while you desperately fuck yourself on my fingers like a bitch", and you just obey because it's jaemin (and because it kind of turns you on). you meet your date's eyes again, this time he has start a conversation with some random guys but his eyes were still on you and you find yourself getting wetter. jaemin's eyes were still on your face, he didn't want to miss any of your reactions. his moves were getting faster, following your hips. "just like that, baby", he says while the grip on your face gets tighter and he groans at how wet you are.

he loves the fact that people were watching (especially your date) and seeing how good he was making you feel. you feel your legs getting weaker and jaemin notices immediately how you're starting to shake. you try your best to keep your voice down, even if the music was loud enough to cover it. jaemin's fingers keeps fucking you as you start grabbing his arm so you don't fall. "gonna cum jaem...", your hips follows jaemin's hand and you look at him. you immediately see the tenderness in his look and you feel your heartbeats getting faster just by the way he's looking at you. jaemin didn't take off his eyes one second off your face, he just couldn't. you finally reach your orgasm, moaning his name and totally forgetting all the people around you. jaemin hold you so you don't fall because of the intense orgasm you're having. he takes off his fingers to bring it to his mouth, licking it without his eyes leaving yours. "i'm so glad to have this pussy just for me, you taste so fucking good", he smirks when he sees your cheeks heating up again and his lips finds yours for a sweet but intense kiss. you accidentally make an eye contact with your date (that you totally forgot) and straighten yourself immediately, pulling your dress down and giving jaemin a serious look. "fuck jaemin... that was so embarrassing! he's still looking at me...", you say, feeling way more ashame than you were when jaemin had his fingers in you. "he is? maybe i should fuck you in front of him so he will understand?", he playfully raises his eyebrows and you gently slap him on the arm, trying to hid your face in his neck. "shut up!", he can't even fight a smile, holding you closer. that's when he realized that it was too late. jaemin was falling for you.

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

A Deal | Vox x Gen Z Reader

A/N— Decided to turn my little drabble into a little series of one-shots based off of ideas I come up with and any requests y'all may have for it 💅🏻 ALSO a huge thank you to @writteninlunarlight-years for the idea that inspired me to kickstart the series! It's very much 'enemies to lovers' core (kinda, I guess?), but I have no idea how far this will go lol. Hope everyone enjoys this — sorry it took so long :)

Warnings: Reader is implied female, Valentino existing, mentions of souls being owned, reader is close to being an overlord

Word Count: 1,724

Summary: You were a growing threat — and what better way to keep an eye on said threat, than to have you start living under the same roof as three of the most influential overlords in Hell? This is only the beginning. . .

Since your arrival to Hell, things had been nothing short of interesting — from your offers that couldn't be refused, all the way to the demon's that warily approached or backed off when you were near.

It was quite the spectacle.

You were quickly rising within the ranks of Hell, from a mere sinner to damn near an overlord — for all the souls you claimed in a few short months. It was noticeable — your social climbing.

What you hadn't expected was two overlords reaching out in the same day, both itching for some sort of deal.

You'd heard whispers of the feared Radio Demon and practically laughed at the thought of people being scared of him — sure his smile was off-putting, but other than that, you didn't really see the hype.

So when he approached you outside of the Café you'd began to frequent, striking up casual conversation as if you were old friends, you quickly understood what was going on.

He was powerful. You were becoming more powerful. He offered guidance and you knew there was a 'but' coming.

When it dropped, you sighed, before sipping on your warm beverage.

"I can offer you guidance, and in return, I want your soul as a pledge of undying loyalty, my dear!" He made a hand motion, as if he planned on writing your name in the stars — could you even see the stars from Hell?

"I'm sorry — but other than guidance, what do I get out of it? I've done well on my own for the last six months."

Protection. Respect. Free housing. It had almost been tempting — especially the free housing, especially in that economy. . . But in the end, you had told him that you'd think about it.

In reality, you wouldn't.

Giving up your freedom for half the shit you could get on your own? He had you fucked up.

Then there was Vox; the wide open rival of Alastor. You'd actually seen him around, having been in a couple clubs he was coincidentally visiting at the same time.

When he approached you, it was three hours later and you were actively sending a message to the group chat of demons whose souls you owned, over Sinstagram. You were simply reminding them of the consequences if they took the food that CLEARLY had your name written on it.

You didn't care that you were sitting in a restaurant — if any of them touched that leftover sub quarter, you'd kill them, and not in a funny or ironic way. You'd actually kill them double dead with no return. 

When you looked up, he questioned your business with 'the fossil' and was met with a blank stare rather than words.

He clarified that he meant Alastor.

"Oh. I don't have any." You replied simply, reading the few messages that popped up on screen.

At the revelation, he was pleased and began listing off all of the things he could provide that Alastor 'would fail miserably at'.

Money. Protection. Respect. A sounding board for ideas. Anything your heart desired. All at a small cost of being under his surveillance almost 24/7.

That snatched your attention away from the two demons who began arguing in their native languages. Did you understand them? Fuck no. Would you be translating that later? Abso-fuckin-lutely.

"And what's in it for you?" You asked the TV demon. You didn't like the thought of being under surveillance and having little to no privacy, but his deal had already been sweetened by Vox not wanting your soul.

"Power all the way around. With my influence, you can be a billion times better than that staticky prick. You'll practically have demons begging on their knees."

"Tempting." You admitted.

"What do you think?"

"Eh, fuck it. Why the hell not?"

From there it was a flurry of events — you remembered eating, but then you were leaving with Vox and then quickly found yourself in a meeting room with the other Vees and shit you had to sign, stating that you wouldn't spill any details of the inner workings of any of the three companies.

Who did he take you for?

Once you read each document thoroughly, making sure it wasn't a contract for your soul, you signed your name on the tablets screen and sat back in your seat, pulling out your phone to begin translating the argument from the beginning.

"Great! Ground rules — our private spaces are off limits unless we explicitly tell you otherwise, that includes bedrooms, offices, and basically everything that isn't a —"

"Uh-huh, got it." You mumbled — snorting at the beyond creative insults that began to flood the screen in English.

"Listen—"

"It's my nap time, TV boy. If you can put this conversation in a text, do it." You sighed, stretching your limbs. They popped as you stood — who showed these fuckers how to make gifs of each other?

Oh.

You did. HA!

"You know I can kill you, right?" Vox questioned, his claws digging into the table.

"So could a really motivated duck — or a Canadian goose. Those things are straight out of Hell, Box."

"It's Vox." He growled.

Ooh spicy. "Whatever —"

"Can you be serious for five minutes?"

"Ok boomer."

His screen glitched and his claws dug further into the desk as he stared at you.

Velvette barked a laugh and looked away from her phone long enough to see Vox on the verge of malfunctioning, a smirk slipping onto her face. "Can we keep her? I like this one."

"This one's more tolerable than the last." Valentino mused, blowing his smoke into the air. He leaned forward in his seat, uncrossing his legs. "And we don't even know her name."

"The name's Y/N. Don't wear it out." You winked before turning around and exiting the door you had been ushered through, however long ago. The moment the door closed, you heard Vox angrily talking with Velvette and Valentino, who were much calmer than the TV overlord.

Oh, this will be fun. A good idea, for sure.

Thirty minutes later, when you were in the room Vox had told you was yours, both Velvette and Valentino followed you on Sinstagram before adding you to the Vees official group chat.

Your first week living with the Vees went by rather quickly — of course, you respected their privacy as requested, spending most of your time in your room or the common areas which mostly consisted of the kitchen, living room, and game room.

Still, you'd managed to piss Vox off three more times, and got Velvette and Valentino to join in without trying.

Velvette quickly picked up your terminology, calling Vox a boomer at any given opportunity. It pissed him off to no end. Valentino had only done it twice, mostly because they both spent a lot of time working and only interacted with Vox when he had the time to.

Within the first seventy-two hours, you noticed the weird obsession Vox had with Alastor and you sarcastically quoted a scene from a movie at dinner that night.

"Is this love, Agent Romanoff?"

And he had looked at you weirdly, pausing mid rant. Later you had to explain to the other two that it was from a movie — and who Agent Romanoff was.

Vox avoided you mostly, which you chalked up to him thinking you were annoying. Good.

By the end of the first month, Velvette had you chilling with her while she worked, usually with you being the sounding board for her ideas.

More often than not, you had good ideas.

That little fact prompted her to throw you a sketch book, telling you to get to work.

You were getting paid to be there, so whatever.

When you weren't with Velvette, you were declining Valentino's countless invitations to sit with him while he worked — you wanted nothing to do with that. Porn wasn't really your thing, even when you were alive, but you had a bunch of friends who were super into it.

Instead you went out alone, claiming you were getting lunch for yourself. You'd get lunch, after making a few deals with wayward demons who would thrive under your influence.

That one particular day, you hadn't noticed either presence behind you, until a fight broke out, causing you to turn around to see Alastor and Vox going at each other's throats — and not in an interesting way.

You somehow broke it up just after Alastor cracked Vox's screen.

"Why the fuck are you here?" You bit out harshly, directed at the two overlords who now stood three feet apart like scolded children, neither pleased to be there.

"You left without saying anything." Vox crossed his arms.

"You hadn't reached out, my dear." Alastor hummed, distastefully glancing over at the TV demon.

You groaned, throwing your head back. "Listen, get the fuck over yourselves! At this rate, I answer to Velvette, not the two of you boomers. Got it?"

Alastors eyes began to twitch as static filled the air, whereas Vox's cracked screen glitched as you walked away.

Later, when Vox approached you, you noticed that his screen was fixed. That was good.

"Got a minute, [Y/N]?" He questioned.

You looked up from the sketch book in hand and nodded, mumbling 'sure' as you closed it. You were tired from the long day.

So his next question caught you off guard.

"Why do you do this to me?"

"Do what?"

"Why do you purposely piss me off? You get along with everyone else, yet you call me names and disrespect my entire existence. Why?"

You sighed, not really having a real answer. "That's just the way I am, how I've always been. . . And in my defense, I call everyone names. . . Not just you. So, don't think you're special, Box—"

"— Vox —"

"I'm a bitch to everyone, just most don't realize it because their bitch scale broke a long time ago. Now, go. I have shit to do that doesn't involve stroking your fragile ego."

Vox wasn't sure what it was, but he knew he was going to keep a closer eye on you. What was so different about you?

You were close enough in biological age to Velvette, yet while there were similarities, there were so many differences. . . He wasn't sure what to think about any of it. Especially with you climbing up the power ladder.

[nextstopparis]

i really just need good like mid to long length fix recs please i’m begging

hey bestie, i didnt know if you had any specific type of fic in mind or just length and what u consider mid so here are a few fics with 25k+ word counts and thats basically all they have in common🫶 also these are all more or less merthur im so sorry. i hope u find something new here!!!

Arthur, Sincerely by MerlinLikeTheBird (47.8k) (THE FLUFF IN THIS MADE ME CRY also its canon era)

To Begin Anew (need ao3 acc) by ohHeyThereBigBadWolf (27.7k) (ive read this like five times. i think about it constantly. canon divergence)

that lightning-strike feel by TheLurkingContessa (32.5k) (cmon merthur training with weapons together??? also canon era)

An Illusion of Sorts by lordvoldemortsnipple (133.7k) (ive also read this like 3 times which is sorta insane bc its 100k+ words omfg… modern au w magic)

Annum Inanis (The Empty Year) (need ao3 acc) by anonymintea (43.2k) (i DIED. canon era)

Charting Stars On A Stained Glass Ceiling by mornmeril (80k) (my note on ao3 under this is just OHMYGOD a bunch of times so. future au with magic)

a thimble of light for an acre of sky by celaenos (36.2k) (THIS IS NOT MERTHUR well theres like a hint of merthur at the very end but mostly its pendragon siblings and morgwen. I DIED. canon divergence)

Chasing Spring (ok TECHNICALLY this is a series but overall its 58.7k words so) by Gimli_s_Pickaxe (god merlin au do i really need to say anything else. canon era)

Keep the Magic Secret (73.5k) (i feel like i cant say I DIED again or else it’ll start losing its meaning to you but really i did. canon era)

M-RYS by mornmeril (123.2k) (ive also read this three times and was actually just craving a reread yesterday so. hmm. future au with magic)

We Pull These Jobs To Make A Little Money (No One Gets Hurt If They Don’t Act Funny) by leashy_bebes (48.9k) (this fic left me speechless all i could muster in my ao3 notes was “oh my god” not even capitalized like it shook me to my core. modern au)

You’ve Got My Heart, I’ve Got Your Hand by FervidAsAFlame (29.3k) (ive read this about five times it makrs me cry its so sweet i Love Them. modern au)

The Tournament of All Magicks by Cori Lannam (corilannam) (41.3k) (CMONNNN merlin fighting in a TOURNAMENT??? cmon. ohh craving a reread for this one too now… canon era)

The Future Soon by lady_ragnell (30.2k) (i loved this fic so so much. like theres just something about the vibe of it that im obsessed with. could also be the enemies to lovers thing. modern au with magic)

Sweeter Dreams by Tierfal (35.3k) (FREED VIVIAN OF MEN! i mean what more could i want. canon divergence)

Truth Is a Whisper by seperis (25k) (im being so serious go read everything by seperis. everything. GO. FIRST TINTAGEL bc that is my fav fic of all time probably but its 20k words so i couldnt put it here. GO!! theyre my fav author it took EVERYTHING not to rec all their fics. canon divergence)

Accidental Memory in the Case of Death by derryere (74.9k) (theres just something so. So. I DONT KNOW. overwhelming about them in this. its reincarnation au which might be why. one line made me cry)

The Ivy Crown by dayari (derryday) (252.2k) (ive read this three times. look at the word count. i will probably read it again. green knight au thing. theyre just. ohmygod)

Dower the Stars by RurouniHime (40.6k) (LISTEN. actually idek what i can say about this. except for the fact that its the PERFECT FIC. literally. its perfect. im especially in love with arthur and gwens friendship in this but anyway. canon divergence.)

[annie-creates]

Fool me too

Pairing: Lady Lesso x reader

Genre: fluff

Words: 1000

Note: Happy April Fool's! And Easter Monday! This day just calls for a fic like this.

You could have expected it. Should have, really. As the freezing cold water slowly seeps into your clothes being watered down from head to toe, you’re more disappointed in yourself rather than your students. They were the offsprings of pure evil after all, rotten to their very core. After the salt and sugar switched in your morning coffee, stinky mushrooms exploding in your office and poisonous vines sneakily hanging from the hallway’s ceilings, you should have known better than to step into your classroom without checking it out first.

April fools was after all a very popular concept amongst the nevers so you would be almost let down if they didn’t try to achieve some misdemeanors this week. And it was only Monday. How are you gonna get through the whole week you had no idea. Maybe it’s time to put on one of those scary armors that roam the corridors or just take a vacation. That however would be a sign of weakness and cowardice and that was foreign to you as a fellow never.

So you teach the lesson proudly in your wet clothes and at the end leave after all your students. You carefully turn every corner, looking out for any clues on their next trap. You spend the rest of your day watching over your shoulder and rather carefully tasting everything you’re about to eat or drink. You’re determined to not let them fool you even one more time, the score already being too prone in their favor. They keep teasing you a little longer and you’ll come up with a payback so severe they could never see it coming.

Clearly you weren’t observant enough tho because as you’re walking over the bridge talking with Dovey after today’s dinner, she steps on a wire that activates a mechanism which pushes you both over the edge into the muddy water. As if you weren’t soaked and humiliated enough for today, as you crawl out from the water to the small beach by the castle, a thrower full of confetti and glitter explodes over you. The laughter of your students fades as they run away, hopefully at least a little scared of your possible revenge.

You make your way into your bedroom, luckily without any other stupid pranks in your way. Your wife is already comfortably sprawled over the sofa in front of the lit fireplace and the flames dance over her face making her ginger hair shine more than usual. You sigh heavily as you close the door and she looks over at you from the book in her lap, clearly finding your state very amusing.

“Shut up.” You warn her before she can even say anything.

“I wasn’t going to laugh at you.” Leonora says but her face betrays her.

“Yeah, very funny. This is all your doing anyway.” You pester her.

“How come?” Lesso questions with her head tilted slightly to the side.

“You raised them like this. Audacious and impudent. You’re responsible for their stupid jokes.” But even you knew you couldn’t blame all the student’s effrontery on their dean.

“Why don’t you rather go clean up in the bathroom?” She offers instead.

“If YOU try to fool with me I swear to heavens I’m gonna divorce you.“ You warn your wife as you make your way to the sink.

Lucky for you, or more for her, she didn’t play any childish pranks on you and you took a long shower without her interrupting. It took a lot of effort getting all the mud and confetti off yourself and you’ll be lucky if your dress is still gonna be washable and wearable. There was still some glitter in your hair and skin you couldn’t get rid of, but it’ll have to be enough for now. When you return to the warmed-up bedroom, your wife is still sitting in the same position reading her book.

“If it’s going to make you feel better, I’m gonna threaten them all with a good long stay in the doom room tomorrow.” She proposed as she extended the blanket draped over her legs for you to sit under it next to her.

“It’s fine. I’ll just have to be more alert. It’s a good practice.” You admit, not really mad at your students anymore. “You should see my office, it’s a disaster.”

“It can’t be that bad, can it? I’m sure you won’t let them fool you again.” Leonora comforts you as she kisses your forehead.

“It’s not bad, it’s even worse. This morning they switched the sugar and salt, so my breakfast was ruined. My office stinks like a hundred years old troll and I had to spend a whole hour teaching soaking wet. I could hardly get a word out over the teeth chattering. Which I’m sure they found pretty amusing.” You explain all that happened in your horrendous day. “Mother-fucking stupid April fools.”

“Well it sure will be better tomorrow.” Lesso instinctively tries to warm you up.

“I should probably be proud of them for succeeding, but they better watch out tomorrow cause I’m coming back after them.” You admit, picking on the loose strands of the blanket.

“I’m sure it will settle down, they just got too excited for today.” She admits, if there’s anything that bores the nevers it’s repeating stuff they already succeeded in.

“Yeah yeah, whatever. I’m tasting the sugar before I put it in my coffee this week though.” You remind both yourself and her reaching out for your own book that was waiting for you on the coffee table.

You settle down next to Leonora leaning on her shoulder as you get back to reading your own unfinished book before going to bed. A cozy, calm, silent evening was what you needed right now after a day full of surprises and pranks. Little did you know she wasn’t really paying attention to the words in her book anymore, already planning her revenge on her students for tormenting her beloved wife.

[honeycreamsweets]

Rebounds suck

Tetsurō Kuroo x Gender Neutral Reader

Mentions- sitting in a restaurant. Kuroo feels bad but not that bad. Reader is disappointed. Angst. Miscommunication.

Word count- 486

Notes- wow, I’m alive. Love Kuroo but missing that angst. A lil vent I guess. No beta. Enjoyyyy.

Kuroo sat in the booth of a small cozy cafe. He glanced down at his knuckles as he clenched his fists slowly. Uncomfortable, discomfort, guilt and a bit of anxiety riddled him to his core. But the worst of all, he just wanted to leave. His warm hazel eyes slowly trailed from his unclenching and clenching fists to across the table… and there you sat. Your face looked like a mix of shocked, disappointed and hurt. His eyes met your eyes and he exhaled sharply. His fingers went through his hair before he slumped back in his seat. What could he say to you? What else could he do?

“So… I’m just a rebound then…? You don’t really want anything to do with me unless it’s intimacy…?” You asked unsurely. Like you wanted this to be a sick prank. But there was no laugh. No cheeky smile or anything obvious from Kuroo. He was serious and he had just been up front to you about not feeling the same about you. You weren’t crying or heart broken but you felt… empty and a little hopeless. You didn’t know if you could even be mad at him. But you liked Kuroo. You thought that he liked you just the same but instead…

You were just the rebound for his relationship that ended that same month. Kuroo wanted the passion and flirting without the commitment… he just never

Specified to not get attached.

“Look, I’m really sorry… really. I’m just not looking for anything serious yet. I just broke up with my partner of three years. You’re a wonderful person. I think you’re cute and funny. I like hanging out with you and I like it when we make out. I wanna keep seeing you.. but I just don’t feel the same as you do.” Kuroo tried to put on his most reassuring and gentle tone. His guilt was tearing away at his soul. You didn’t cry, or even seem remotely mad. The look of defeat and disappointment on your face was making his remorse worsen. Why couldn’t you react more? At least then, he could have chalked it up to your bad attitude. But you didn’t. Kuroo felt his eye twitch when his gaze followed yours.

You stopped looking at him and a thick blanket of silence fell between you two in the booth. You slowly got up from your seat. With a soft voice, you spoke your goodbye.

“Thank you for telling me… I’ll… I’ll talk to you later.”

Kuroo watched you go and he nodded a bit. He tried to give you an apologetic smile and nod but your gaze was past him. Kuroo huffed in frustration at your lack of response but the sounds of your shoes echoed in his head. The bell on the restaurant door rang as it opened. He didn’t have to look back to know that you left.

“Damn it..”

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

~*~

1. ITMF: Just finished ShanaStoryteller's "By Any Other Name" where resurrected WWX pretends to be a woman, and it's put me in the mood for fic where he is actually resurrected as a woman but, here's the key: he's hamstrung by the extremely patriarchal society he's in. The few fic I've read that have him in a woman's body usually hand wave over that but I'd love to read a fic that doesn't. Anything like that out there??? @kimboo-york

To Deserve So Much More by renysen (locked to archive) (T, 20k, wangxian, summoned by f!oc, getting together, Mojo’s post) has WWX resurrected by the youngest daughter of a non-cultivating family and deals with several issues of him being a woman as a result.

~*~

2. do you know any fics that explore what happens if yzy lives past the wen attack on lp? wwx blamed himself enough without her active vitriol so i'd love to read how her survival would impact the yunmeng trio (esp wwx) and/or the war. thank you!

💖  Lessons relearned by Iamnotawriter (T, 44k, WangXian, LQR & WWX, Not Madam Yu Friendly, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Inventor WWX, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, No Golden Core Transfer, YZY Bashing) has YZY surviving the fall of LP & has stuff about how her leadership is different from JC

Yearning for Miles by Murahi (M, 378k, WangXian, LQR/SiSi, Canon Divergence, Angst, Fluff, Slow burn, Mutual Pining, seeing the future) has YZY surviving IIRC (it's been a while since I read it & I bailed partway through so idk how it goes) & the tags mention YZY redemption

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3. hi ! in the mood for fics (canon) that feature wangxian and lan sizhui ! it doesn’t need to be about them as parents, although it definitely can, but just having them (especially lwj) act parental or acknowledged as parents or exist as a family unit would be much appreciated, kind of like “Crack me open, pour you out” by tenillypo. basically any parental canon wangxian (even just featured) would be amazing thank you !! @willesnelson

to the act of making noise by words-writ-in-starlight (WordsWritInStarlight) (G, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX, wangxian, Grief/Mourning, Father-Son Relationship, inquiry, Music, Angst, Fluff, Found Family, podfic available)

kick at the darkness 'til it bleeds daylight by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (T, 75k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Eventual Happy Ending, Getting Together, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Inspired by The Parent Trap (1998), Kid Fic, teen shenanigans, two a-yuans, Fluff and Angst) it's set in canon times however its def an AU storyline but you get a lot of family feels

Finding Balance Series by Zombubble (G/T, 117k, WangXian, Character Study, Canon Compliant, Mentions of Blood, Mentions of Violence, Mentions of Death, Grief, But only a little, Nightmare, Canon-Typical Violence, within a nightmare, injuries, Underage Drinking, Light Angst, Happy Ending, JC Being an Asshole, but not too bad, Anxiety, Grief/Mourning, Self-Reflection, Conflict Resolution, Internal Conflict, lots of talking, Lots of Thinking, LSZ-centric, Soft LQR, Sort Of, Collective Bargaining, LSZ accidentally incites a mini off-screen rebellion, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Angst with a Happy Ending, Post-Canon, mild panic attack) not sure if its quite what #3 is asking (most recent itmf post) but there's a post-canon sizhui-centric series about sizhui coming to terms with remembering he's a wen and stuff, and the last two in the series (esp the last one) have parental wangxian helping him work through things

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4. Itmf wwx n friends as a crazy crack funny af potty mouthed wholesome group!! Modern au. Them being crack heads in a nut. Like, doing stuff like sneaking out, putting skates and running at night, sitting in shopping trolly and pushing it ahead, Fighting in Instagram comments section. Just wwx an friends. Idm relationships.

He lo I'm for #4 itmf. fic is really good, but not what I was aiming for, cuz yeah the plot was chef's kiss, but didn't had much of wy n frnds, lemme clear: wy n frnds shenanigans, doing stupid things, what the fuk moments. This time doesn't matter if it's canon, modern or alternate Universe. Thankyou

The Fifth Type of Non-Contact Force by Caixx (Not Rated, 83k, WangXian, Modern AU, High School, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Fluff and Humor, Actually Somewhat Canon, Mutual Pining, Horny Teenagers, Angst with a Happy Ending, Non-Graphic Smut) lots of shenanigans here

Carefully Orchestrated Plans (no strings attached) by Maledictius (T, 101k, WangXian, Modern AU, Chatting & Messaging, Orchestra, Fluff and Humor, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Gossip)

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5. ITMF!! What’s a wangxian fic you’ve read where, as you sadly leave your last kudos on the last chapter, you think, THIS COULD BE A MOVIE 😤!

Those fast paced, edge of your seat, tight plot, spot on character fics that you’d buy a ticket to see? Or maybe a smaller lyrical fic that could totally be an art house short film?

I was rereading Hobbsy3’s Tragedy is Not the End. I always have to make myself popcorn it’s so good! So yep, that’s my movie fic!

Dear mods, please direct me to the right list if this has been asked before!! 💚

Wei Wuxian Makes a Wish series by natcat5 (M, 119k, wangxian, major character death, underage, madoka magica au, modern w/ magic, time travel, high school au, body horror, self-harm, angst w/ bittersweet ending, time loop, mental instability, suicidal thoughts) is it cheating if it's technically based on a movie? I didn't need to know anything about what this is based on besides a quick Google but if asker is looking for something that leaves them feeling breathless with all kinds of feelings this is the first one that came to mind

The Fifth Type of Non-Contact Force by Caixx (Not Rated, 83k, WangXian, Modern AU, High School, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Fluff and Humor, Actually Somewhat Canon, Mutual Pining, Horny Teenagers, Angst with a Happy Ending, Non-Graphic Smut) link in #4 honestly this also felt like a teenage coming of age indie movie

💖 Echo, Murmur, Dream, Here by bluerainmist (M, 51k, wangxian, canon divergence, WWX survives, sect leader WWX, yiling wei sect au, slow burn, angst w/ happy ending, getting together, pining, love confessions, reunions, mind all the tags) I just read this and the descriptions of the armor and battlefields really felt like they would suit huge movie screens. It just had that imax vibe, ya know?

Also maybe 5 should look at the “Beautiful Writing and Good Plot” Compilation | Pt. 2 comps a lot of the fics on there feel like a movie

花无百日红; the flower that withers by yiqie (M, 29k, wangxian, Time Travel Fix-It of Sorts, Case Fic, Spells & Enchantments, Hurt/Comfort, Forgiveness, It's about the emotional catharsis, If you have ever laughed at WWX clowning himself for the 'no one will marry you' scene, This fic is: for you) i'm not a writer so i can't describe the feelings this fic evoked in me, but this is one of those fics that is so prettily written and if it's got a movie adaptation i would definitely watch it

In Imitation of Life by travelingneuritis (E, 70k, wangxian, modern cultivation, scifi au, android WWX, tone: neon seedy, rich people are bored and terrible, post-apocalyptoc landscape, happy ending, smut, severe major characger injury, time loss) everything this author writes is like a movie tbh

symmetry by bleuett (M, 44k, WangXian, Space, Science Fiction, Happy Ending, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Holding Hands, Blow Jobs, Hand Feeding, Cultivation in Space, Yearning, Reunions, Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, Canon-Typical Violence, Minor Injuries, Grief/Mourning, Unconventional Time Travel, Burial Mounds) I remember reading this and getting major interstellar vibes

💖 Pentimento. by orange_crushed (E, 73k, wangxian, modern, college/university au, art conservation, museums, pining, not actually unrequited love, angst w/ happy ending, misunderstandings, smut, major character injury, hospitalization, hurt/comfort, past incarceration, forgery) this is like an A24 Sundance festival winner, author writes such incredible prose

Post Mortem by Cataclysmic_Calamity (E, 78k, wangxian, modern, Psychological Horror, friends with benefits, they're both fucked up but they love each other so much, Slow Burn Mystery, Unnegotiated Kink, Dom/sub, Anal Sex, Consensual Non-Con, Stalking, Drug Addiction, Serial Killers, in Wei Ying's desire to critique the 'final girl' trope he accidentally becomes one, Angst with a Happy Ending, meta commentary on the horror and true crime genres) A horror movie!!!! Very much on the edge of your seat.

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6. Huge thanks to the mods and participants for this wonderful blog! You keep my Mark for Later list going strong.

ITMF fics where someone tries to harm WWX because of LWJ. Maybe they're obsessively in love with him and want to get rid of the competition, or maybe they hate him and want to hurt him in the worst way possible by hurting the one he loves most, or whatever. Bonus points if Wangxian assume that whoever seems to be coming after WWX is coming after him because he's the Yiling Laozu instead of because he's LWJs love, and so they make wrong assumptions and mistakes. Happy for similar recs also, even if it's not a perfect fit! No Jiang Cheng bashing though plz. Thanks all! @flamingwell

this body yet survives by RoseThorne (T, 50k, WIP, WangXian, No War AU, Recovery, Trauma, Dissociation, Courting Rituals, Near Death Experiences, Attempted Murder, Eventual Happy Ending, Panic Attacks, Protective Siblings, Triggers, Protective LWJ, Protective LQR, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Bad Parent YZY, POV Third Person, POV LWJ, Depression, Good Sibling JC, Good Sibling JYL)

A Soft Storm by AvoOwO (Not rated, 47k, wangxian, modern au, hurt WWX, LWJ pov, protective LWJ, not SS friendly, car accidents, hurt/comfort, heavy angst w happy ending, sexual harrasment, stalking, crying, blood & injury & gore, major character injury, college, slut shaming, insults)

Coincidence is Another Man's Fate by TriviasFolly (M, 164k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha LWJ, Omega wwx, Sexual Harassment, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, WangXian play the long game, UNTIL THEY DON'T, Getting Together, fated pairs, Eventual Attempted Sexual Assult and Recovery, Modern Setting - Office, Mpreg)

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7. Hi!! Does anyone know of any fics where dual cultivation classes are part of the lectures that all the young masters attend? I’d love to see them paired up to meditate, study, duel, night hunt, perhaps even take a couple of sex magic classes. In my head I am picturing something like those Harry Potter fics where students are paired due to compatible magic and they study together regardless of house division. Thank you!

turn towards the sun by Ariaste (E, 21k, WangXian, Kushiel's Legacy Fusion, The Night Court (Kushiel's Legacy), Kink Negotiation, Courtesans, Intimacy, BDSM, Consent, Wangxian's canonical fetishes, roughly Cloud Recesses-era, Extracurricular Kissing, Impact Play, Kink Experimentation, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, (aka Madam Yu being canonically willing to hit WWX)) This may not be exactly what was requested but it’s definitely school and wangxian definitely “study” together:)

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8. Are there any fics where Wei Wuxian purposely tries to seduce Lan Wangji? Like he wears revealing clothes, touches him more often, moans while eating...etc? Like, Wei Wuxian knows Lan Wangji likes him and is trying to make him crack by being all flirty/seductive?

puzzle pieces by Yuisaki (T, 6k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Roommates, Fluff, Humor, Friends to Lovers, Sharing Clothes, Getting Together, Pining)

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9. Hi mods! Can I ask for the next ITMF for some fics where WWX, JFM or even LQR are angry at Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren for not being careful enough during night hunts and leaving WWX alone? Something along the lines of why they didn't have a back up plan or why didn't they leave WY in Lotus Pier or somewhere else where he would be looked after while they were busy and risking something happening to him bc they didn't tell anyone where their child was if something happened to them. Doesn't really need to be bashing but definitely some abandonment issues and not WWX just being alright with what his parents did and wanting to do the same

Thanks!! @jiangclaritybell

❤️ The One-Body Problem by metisket (T, 29k, LJY & WWX, LJY & LSZ, wangxian, possession, cohabitation, Mojo’s bookmark) Lan Jingyi (very) briefly mentions how stupid it was for WWX's parents to just leave him when they went off night hunting

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10. Hii!! I hope you guys are well <3

I have a request for the next itmf, i recently read a fic where wwx is adopted by hua lian, so I was wondering if you had more fics in the same category?? The fic i read was the hearth series by eccentrick!!

Thank you in advance ❤️❤️

there's a whole tag Huā Chéng & Xiè Lián (Tiān Guān Cì Fú) Adopt Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn for that, but in specific

Hua Xianle by Tiffany_Guinne (Not rated, 170k, hualian, wangxian, TGCF, canon divergence, not Jiang friendly, madam lan lives, WWX adopted by hualian, WWX with different name, overprotective hualian, hurt WWX, WIP)

Narrative of Strength by MeltedIceAngel (T, 61k, WIP, WangXian, HuaLian, Canon Divergence, Adopt WWX, Found Family, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Protective XL, Protective HC, Adoption, Kidnapping, Attempted Kidnapping, Serious Injuries, Angst with a Happy Ending, TGCF)

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11. Hello, for the next In the mood for, do you have any wangxian fan fic recs of novel canon divergence/fix it that do not feature yunmeng bros reconciliation? Thank you so much in advance!

Lay my body down by tawaen (M, 48k, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, wangxian, WWX & JYL, canon divergence, time travel, rogue cultivator WWX, no golden core transfer, not cultivation world friendly, not JC friendly, OCs) WWX travels back in time & goes fuck the cultivation world & JC in particular

The Core Issue by Hauntcats (T, 21k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Canon Divergence) WWX rebuilds his core while living in the Burial Mounds, JC loses his & is pissed about it

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12. Can you recommend me Darkji fanfic and an oblivious weiying or a dark dark lanzhan where there's an abuse and manipulation included I don't mind🫶🏻

Obelus by Celestios (Not rated, 167k, wangxian, rape/non-con, non-con elements, NO rape, Non-Consensual Spanking, Non-Consensual Punishments, Spanking, Punishments, Dubious Morality, Dubious Consent, physical discipline, Physical Abuse, Toxic Relationships, Abusive Relationship, Kidnapping, Stockholm Syndrome, mention of violence, mention of drugs, Mention of alcohol, Possessive Behavior, Obsessive Behavior, Unhealthy Relationships, dark LWJ, Baker WWX, Bodyguard WN, Mentions of weapons, Gun mentions, Slow Burn, Long, Doctor WQ, Self Medicating, WWX has ADHD, Trauma Bonding, Psychological Manipulation, Gaslighting, Organized Crime, underground crime, Underground business, illegal business)

3-in-1 Shampoo/Conditioner/Bodywash - the Real Gateway Drug by Anonymous (E, 22k, WIP, WangXian, one sided wangxian (but for how long?), sketchy as fuck LWJ, does this count as dark! LWJ, implied bi WWX, modern au - no cultivation, Piss Marking, Come Marking, cum in food, brief cameo of food fucking, piss in food, Exhibitionism, Sloppy Seconds, Alcoholism, mention piss drinking, No Sex, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, sexually charged assisted pissing, accidental hold, Omorashi, freak4freak, emotional manipulation/subdrop of sorts, co-pissing, panty huffing, Degradation, dubcon blowjob, FaceFucking, Non-Consensual Somnophilia, pissing on someone who's passed out drunk, Spanking, Verbal Humiliation, Mutual Masturbation, jerking off walkthrough (with commentary), threats of edging, mutual CNC fantasies, Unreliable Narrator, I gave LWJ the LBH sized cock he deserves, Bathing, pissing in fleshlight) 3-in-1 shampoo/conditioner/bodywash - the real gateway drug for itfm 12. It’s more extremely dubious consent than actual abuse, but there is definitely a bit of gaslighting.

Kinkotber Day 4: A Shift in Perspective by Anonymous (E, 2k, WangXian, Stockholm Syndrome, Rape/Non-con Elements, there's no violence but he certainly doesn't ask for concent, Dark LWJ, Oblivious WWX, Cockwarming, Exhibitionism, bimboification (kind of), collaring (at the end), Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, PWP, Almost No Dialogue) as the tags say - no actual violence but deffo non/dubcon elements

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13. Hello, do you know any modern or canon au wx fics where wangxian never interacted when they were kids/students but lwj still had a quiet crush on wwx?

and having a marvelous time by varnes (E, 108k, WangXian, Yúnmèng Siblings, Sound of Music AU, (i know!!! i know. stay with me on this.), Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Family Feels, spies to lovers???, Protective Siblings, Sometimes You Just Want Your Dads To Admit They’re Your Dads, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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14. this might be a weirdly specific request for itmf, but I was wondering if you know of any fics where, either through reincarnation or time travel what have you, Lan Sizhui/Wen Yuan raises Wei Ying or Lan Zhan as his child(ren)?

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15. For the next ITMF, can you recommend fic where characters OTHER than wangxian take ownership of their actions prior to wwx's death? (e.g. abandoning wwx/wen civilians to their fate, the mass slaughter of innocents, stealing & profiting off his work while slandering him, etc). I'm not interested in fics where this ownership has a caveat ("it was bad, but wwx was equally bad or worse" - these are fine but it's just not what I want to read.) Thanks! @balleyboley

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16. Anything with wwx with low self-steem????

the thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break by RoseThorne (E, 88k, WIP,   WangXian, Canon Divergence, Soulmates, Self-Esteem Issues, Fix-It, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, PTSD, Handfasting, Panic Attacks, Getting Together, First Time, Aftercare, Implied/Referenced Alcohol   Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Torture, Scars, Chronic Pain, Golden Core Reveal, First Time, Switching, sex-related injury, LWJ Stays at the Burial Mounds, LSZ is a Wèi, Good Sibling JC, Dissociation, Burial Mounds Settlement Days)

Welcome to the Family Series by jiejieaini (E, 237k, WangXian, Modern, Hurt/comfort, Fluff, Angst, Explicit Sex)

❤️ The One-Body Problem by metisket (T, 29k, LJY & WWX, LJY & LSZ, wangxian, possession, cohabitation, Mojo’s bookmark) (link in #9) Seeing the “low self esteem” ask in ITMF made me go: any fic ever? If you want a funny response to it, metisket’s One Body Problem has Jingyi. Enough said.

Don't Leave Me by TrippinOnSkies (E, 19k, WangXian, Modern AU, Marriage Proposal, Mental Breakdown, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Panic Attacks, But they are very mild, Overthinking, Good Sibling JC, Break Up, Gentle Sex, Gentle Kissing, Idiots in Love, Pining, Misunderstandings, Oblivious WWX, LWJ Has Feelings, LWJ is Whipped, Getting Together, NHS & WWX Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy EndingInsecure WWX, WWX Has Issues, WWX Has Self-Esteem Issues, Sad WWX, WWX is Bad at Communicating)

could you find a way to let me down slowly, if you're leaving baby let me down slowly by ravenditefairylights (M, 36k, WangXian, XuanLi, Past MingXian, Canon Divergence, Golden Core Reveal, Implied/Referenced Sex, Miscommunication, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Dynamics, Hurt WWX, Mutual Pining, Unreliable Narrator, Self-Esteem Issues, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Feels, Protective Siblings, Trauma, Slightly dubious consent, courtesy of drunk sex, Inventor WWX, Genius WWX, Phoenix Mountain, Chronic Pain, Getting Together, Fix-It of Sorts, One Braincell Trio, PTSD)

See Me, Feel Me (Listening to You) by Ghost_Honey (T, 29k, WangXian, POV WWX, WWX Needs a Hug, WWX's Abyssmal Self-Esteem, Emotional Healing, Angst, The Juniors love their Senior Wei, Curses, WWX is an Unreliable Narrator, JC & WWX Reconciliation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Platonic Cuddling)

pastel by antebunny (G, 6k, WangXian, Modern AU, College/University, Soulmates, Angst, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Self-Esteem Issues, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unrequited Love, but not actually)

to be loved by wqngji (G, 1k, WangXian, Insecure WWX, Petty LWJ, JC is So Done, Domestic Fluff, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Doubt, Hugs, Hurt WWX)

leading tone by silencemostofall (G, 32k, WangXian, Modern AU, Soulmates, with a lil twist, Eventual Happy Ending, it will not look like it until the very end but I promise there's a happy ending, lesbian wq rights, Music, Orchestra, platonic and romantic pining, wwx's serious self-worth issues, [Podfic] Leading Tone by silencemostofall by Beria1021)

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17. Is there a fic in which yiling people are protective of wei ying and wants him to come back

End Racism in the OTW | The Fire Lapping Up the Creek by notevenyou (E, 66k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, Blood, Respiratory Illness, Major Illness, Fever, Grief/Mourning, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hunger and food scarcity, Surgery, Fix-It of Sorts) it’s mentioned briefly, I believe

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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[sirfrogsworth]

The Babylon Bee School of Comedy

Have you ever wanted to make Elon Musk reply to you with a double cry laughing emoji?

If you crave that sweet billionaire validation you need only follow this carefully crafted conservative comedy content creation course for that powerhouse of online satire... The Babylon Bee.

Soon you too could be bootlicking billionaire balls with the rest of The BBee writers.

Are you ready to get your learn on?

Let us Bee-gin.

The number one most important rule that all The BBee writers must internalize to their core...

Conservative comedy abhors effort.

Brainstorming for hours on end to craft the perfect premise and punchline... is for the Libs. Check out this Facebook meme that got 10,000 likes.

Can you order Starbucks from a bar? Doesn't matter, it's a snowflake drink for a snowflake Lib.

Does this joke not have an actual punchline? Doesn't matter, get lost you stupid Lib!

Is this technically a joke by definition? Doesn't matter, if you believe it is a joke, then it's a joke! Just like modern currency.

If you put too much thought into a joke, it might grow in complexity. That could be confusing! The death knell of any conservative joke are the words, "Hmm, that's a thinker."

This brings us to rule number two...

NO THINKERS!

Let's take this Ben Garrison comic as an example.

Spell everything out! Label everything! Don't leave anything to the imagination! If your audience has to figure something out or draw their own conclusions, what fun is that?

Conservatives want to hear things that are familiar. They want their beliefs parroted back at them. You must regurgitate those beliefs and then just make it *sound* like a joke. Don't break new ground or introduce new ideas. Don't get all caught up in interesting wordplay or clever puns or subverting expectations.

All expectations should be fully verted.

That is definitely a word because I saw someone use it on Facebook. End of research.

Here is a helpful tip. If you can't imagine the joke coming out of the mouth of late night comedy genius GUTFELD!, then you need to dial it back a bit. Do not surpass GUTFELD! levels of humor. GUTFELD! is your touchstone.

Oh, GUTFELD! I laughed so hard I FELD it in my GUT.

See, I went too far with my fancy pun. That is not the GUTFELD! way.

But what happens if inspiration is fleeting and you can't pay attention to your comedy writing task because you don't believe ADHD is real and thus you are unmedicated?

Don't you worry. If you do happen to get writer's block or are distracted by a funny Pepe meme or a shiny object, just call your racist uncle and say the magic word... "Bidenflation."

As the ensuing unhinged rant darts from subject to subject without any kind of connecting theme, just start writing down every right wing buzzword you hear. Then just insert those buzzwords Mad Libs-style into a derivative joke format.

Let's practice!

Ex. 1: Why did the PRONOUNS cross the BORDER? To get to the DRAG QUEEN STORY HOUR!

Ex. 2: How many GENDERS does it take to GROOM a lightbulb? Two! One to hold the BUTT PLUG and one to GO WOKE, GO BROKE.

Great start! I'm sure with a polishing pass those will make more sense. Or not. The bar is pretty much "will it get clicks?" so we're not too worried about coherence.

Heh... Mad Libs.

U MAD, LIBS?

Get it? Cuz Libs are always mad? About the normalized bigotry and whatnot.

Jokes are always better when you need to explain them.

Oh! That's another rule. Write that down. Wisdom like this is why I am teaching this course, of course. Hah, that's like that horse show song. I got jokes coming out the wazoo. Wazoo is my butt, right? Siri, is wazoo a butt? Oof, I'm kinda spacing on what the next lesson is.

I really wish Matt Walsh hadn't flushed my Adderall down the crapper.

Can I get a second opinion? Top Gun was so good. What does Tom Cruise think about ADHD? He always has good takes on stuff like this. Did I leave my oven on? Shazam, what song goes doodoo doo doo doooooo? Can you vacuum a yard? Has anyone tried that? That sounds more like a marijuana thought than an ADHD tangent. I should double check the THC content of that cotton candy vape juice.

I'm flyin' off the rails over here.

Matt, are you super duper sure it's not real?

Okay, fine. I'm an "energetic boy."

I hope whichever fish absorbs my meds is extra focused on whatever fish shit he needs to get done.

COMEDY WRITING!

Sometimes it is best to learn through observation. Let's eavesdrop on an actual The BBee writer's room to see how the sausage is made...

"So what did your racist uncle have to say?"

"Well, first he texted me a cameraphone picture of Trump as an astronaut that he wants me to print out cuz he doesn't know what a crypto wallet is... but then he said all the woke schools are turning kids into a bunch of gay commies."

"EUREKA!"

Classic! The BBee writers strike again. I mean, they aren't striking. There is no commie clamoring for a union at The Babylon Bee. That's for damn sure. FOCUS!

Do you get the joke though? With the kids and the gay and the communism?

Because all of those woke schools totally cover complex economic theories in 4th grade and all it takes to turn gay is a little persuasion from a teacher with green hair. Libs of TikTok wouldn't lie about that. End of research.

Look at this public school teacher!

I mean, you knooow she has a litter box in her classroom. I can just sense it. End of research.

Sure... it is just a context-free picture of a person with green hair in front of a flag and you cannot actually judge the quality of their teaching ability from this. But yoouuu knoooooow she is skipping right over grammar lessons and giving detailed instructions on how to turn gay.

Step 1: Look at a bunch of butts. Step 2: Touch a bunch of butts. Step 3: Gay sex a bunch of butts.

(Replace butts with cooches for lesbians.)

Grooming accomplished.

And you definitely shouldn't look up that green-hair'd, nose ring'd educator and research her any further. Extensive research is for the Libs, bro. Because you definitely don't want to discover she is a passionate high school English teacher who makes fun content on TikTok in the hopes that people will buy things off her wishlist so her students will have a better learning experience. I mean, caring about her students? That's so gay.

YoooOOOuuuUUU knnnooooooOOOw she is a bad teacher because she has green hair and a flag. End. Of. Research.

So... you have your gay communist headline that is perfect to get all of those sweet conservative clicks. But you still have a full webpage to fill out with more words and stuff.

Now I want to see if you learned anything from my perfectly focused and informative teachings. I want you to write some jokes about kids becoming gay communists.

Ready? GO!

Joke #1 Little Billy has wealthy parents so all the students will share his cookie at snack time.

Joke #2 At the beginning of the day, students pick a new gender out of a hat but all the kids fight over Attack Helicopter.

Joke #3 At lunch, the students have to stand in a peanut butter and jelly bread line.

Joke #4 The teacher makes the kids take turns combing each others' hair for a grooming session.

Wait a sec... are those... THINKERS?

No no no no no! You made my brain all confused and thinky!

You need to calm down, you overachieving silly billy. You forgot the first rule... NO EFFORT.

Just make the same joke over and over again with slightly different wording. EASY!

Remember the classic final rule of comedy...

Jokes always get funnier the more you repeat them.

Anyway, that's probably enough... joke.

Now let's close this article out!

Maybe we can drop the pretense this is comedic satire and just do some hardcore pandering. Gotta own the Libs, amirite?

Gender theory and drag queens and guns, oh my! That is pure pander-monium.

Just shove those factless tactless Tucker talking points straight down their gullet. They'll forget this was supposed to be funny and shake their fist in the air with exaltation. And it's definitely a great idea to put the thought of gunning down drag queens in their heads. That won't backfire in any way!

Congratulations! You are now ready to "write" for The Babylon Bee.

Please purchase this official Trump NFT certificate for $99 that acknowledges that you have completed this course and have a very poor understanding of what satire actually is.

End of research.

[cornyonmains]

Got some more thoughts about episode 3 in no particular order.

Episode 3 really helped confirm this strange phenomenon I've noticed of the dark subject matter colliding with rather optimistic symbolic imagery. Almost all the numbers Great sees are angel numbers with messages about seeking enlightenment, harmony, and trusting the path one is on. Black and white cats are symbols of good luck, symbolic of yin and yang. There's a lot of imagery happening between Great and Tyme symbolic of harmony, luck, and enlightenment.

I did not miss, for a single dadgum second, that slanted shot when Korn and Great were talking to each other at the end. If you think of that shot as two characters sitting on opposite sides of a scale, it definitely implies there's a huge imbalance of power favoring Korn, and I found it telling the slant continued when he left the room. Between Title, Korn, Tyme, it's really seeming like Great, for all his flaws, really was mostly just this quiet and oblivious guy who got jerked around and manipulated by a lot of personalities much larger than his own.

Great's far from perfect, but the core part of him is that guy who wanted to play the claw machine, and that puts him on a VERY different level from Korn, who's running a gambling empire and keeping tweakers for sugar baby side-pieces. That doesn't strike me as anything Great would ever conceive of doing, but more importantly, it's something he probably wouldn't have to do. I could see Korn being jealous of the protection he enjoys thanks to his mother's manipulations. She's throwing Korn into a line of fire he doesn't necessarily seem to want to be in either, and I think that's going to cause an issue, especially with Tonkla going off the deep end.

Great outlining the word sex in red when making that chart will never not be funny to me. That's such a guy thing to do.

I'm starting to wonder if Tonkla is on a different timeline, because I'm starting to think that's not the case. I think Great saving Dome happened first, then the killing happened second. I think the cover-up could have been set into motion because Great's prints were found on the rock.

Early Prediction - I think if Title and Korn come into contact with one another, these are two people who both have cause to feel alienated by Great, and who are probably operating with a lot more knowledge and capabilities than he is. I've been trying to figure out why Title is hanging out with Great for awhile now, and I think it has something to do with him maybe being a bit more aware of Great's family than Great is himself. I could definitely see him getting up to something with Korn if he can use the chance to attach himself to what he'd perceive as the favored brother of that family, as well as get revenge on Great.

Anyways, that's all for now, I'm working up the mental fortitude necessary to log onto my work platform and write some reports.

[ghostsferalgremlin]

HORANGI HEADCANONS

Every single thing i'm gonna write down here is how I personally picture Horangi and, as i said in my pinned, if you don't like it scroll away, bye bye.

                                  ................

• He is an idiot, not in a bad way, but in a genuine way.

It's not like he is dumb or something, but he goes on with his days by core memory and that only, this leads to something happening every five - ten minutes or so.

• This man is the definition of feral and they send him on the field like he's a wild animal ready to take down anyone.

He has fun, let's be real, he finds it funny when he hit targets and put down enemies even at hands in hands combat, he lives for it, also he's always ready for a fight, both on and off the field, big grin on his face.

• He lives to scare people.

The dark rituals skin? Yeah he asked for it and i picture the red parts to be reflective so they're only visible on certain lights. Tecnically speaking, i picture it to be good when they need backup or snipers looking over them at nigh, practically he walks around the base in the middle of the night with it on just to scare the shit out of whoever cross his way in the dark.

• He knows he's pretty but the mask stay ON.

Let's be real here, the man know how pretty he is, i picture him using his look to go away with things before joining the army, or before they ruined his face. He still thinks he looks good, but part of his brain refuses to take the mask off not because he's scared they cpuld find him in the base, but because he hates to see the looks of pity of the poeple when they see how he is right now.

• Your food? Nop. HIS food.

If you eat something different than what je's eating be ready to say gpodbye to it 'cause he will definitely ask for a bite, and it's never just a bite. Never. He knows how to do the puppy eyes and knows how to use them.

• He never spoke with anyone for a whole year.

I picture him not knowing any english when he joined and, while he was still learning, he never spoke or never answered to anything in a whole year, both because he didn't know how and because he kinda felt bad not being able to speak correctly. When he started tho it was the end, man never shut up.

• He's tiny.

Listen, i get that canonically they did him almost the same height as König, but i can't help to picture him being like 1.75/1.80 max. And compared to others? He is indeed tiny. Once König picked him up like it was nothing and he never recovered from that.

• Bisexual king.

He's way too chaotic not to be a bisexual, idk what else to say about this.

• His ringtone is a nightmare and once Oni fought him to change it.

His ringtone? Ring ding dong by shinee. Not because he actually likes it, but because he knows how mad people gets when it starts ringing and they can't so nothing to shut it down. He even dance on it just to piss the others off even more.

• Other than that? Man lis a metalcore baby.

He loves it, he lives for it, he knows every band on this planet, he just really likes it. Sometimes he even listen to deathcore or heavy/nu metal, but metalcore? You can find him knowing every word of every song possible.

•Feral, but he gets hurt pretty easily.

Listen, he loves to piss people off, but he also keeps reminding them how much that's his love language and how he keeps doing it cause he loves having them around. When they look genuinely pissed off? This hurts him and he goes days without doing anything because he really thinks people actually hates him, he's hurt by it and it took the same person to say out loud that they care about him to stop the bad thoughts he has.

                                  ................

[temyteabag]

The Smiling Critters are small, colorful, anthropomorphic animals, each appearing as a plush toy with a zipper on the front chest, large gaping smiles, and black eyes with white pupils. Each toy has a unique pendant representing the core aspect of each of their personalities.

In addition to this, each Smiling Critter comes with the ability to emit their own unique scent via a hole in their mouths by pulling on their tails, all of which are traditionally used to aid with sleep or relaxation, being based on a specific type of fruit, herb or flower.

Picky Piggy - SCENT: Citrus - What's more important than play and learning? PickyPiggy knows the answer. A playful body and keen mind are fueled by what's put into them, which is why she encourages her friends to eat a well-balanced diet. Secretly, PB&J's are her favorite food.

Bobby BearHug - SCENT: Rose - A kind, caring soul, Bobby BearHug shows compassion for everyone, and for everything. People and places and things, large or small, are all receivers of her love. Each is enriched by this attention and affection, and in turn, so is she.

DogDay - SCENT: Vanilla - This is DogDay, the sunny, strong, and determined leader of our critters! Each trusts him to find the bright side in any situation, and to have a friendly word of encouragement should they feel down. He'll always keep his friends going, no matter what.

Kickin Chicken - SCENT: Ylang-ylang - This is KickinChicken, the cool kid of the crew, and he maintains that sense of cool through anything, even in the most tense of situations. Knock him down, and he'll pick himself up, brush himself off, and ask: "What's next?"

Hoppy Hopscotch - SCENT: Peppermint - Unafraid to hop where others might sit, Hoppy is the friend everyone needs to maintain their energy and enthusiasm. While sometimes loud or impatient, she'll always hop besides her friends, even if it means slowing up once in a while to keep their pace.

Crafty Corn - SCENT: Jasmine - A conscious observer of both color and creativity in the world. CraftyCorn understands the importance of art, and sharing it with others. Crayons, pencils, paint, or words on the page, CraftyCorn can see beauty in anything imagined given shape.

Bubba Bubbaphant - SCENT: Lemongrass - Bubba Bubbaphant is the brains of the critters. Bright and attentive, he keeps his friends steady and always steers them to make smart choices, that way they all might grow up to be bright and brilliant, each in their own right.

CatNap - SCENT: Lavander - CatNap is a calming presence for the critters and ensures he and his friends always have the right amount of sleep to jumpstart the morning's play! End of the day, there's nothing CatNap enjoys more than watching his friends sleep soundly.

Well hello there!, been a while hasn't it? Anyway, happy fathers day!!

I'm on the last week of exams, just two more and I'm done, hurray! I bring you the smiling critters, I like the story of the critters and Poppy Playtime, it's funny, and it can be shady if one wish to see ir like that. Curios thing, my favorite of the bunch is CatNap yet I think the best of the drawing os CraftyCorn.

In another note, have you seen the new Inky Mistery chapter?! 'cause boy was it really something! I loved it!! Go & check it out if ya have the time.

See ya all, hopefully we'll see each other soon!

P.D. all the info here came from the Poppy Playtime wiki, link below:

[quodekash]

guys jokezo just made out and now they have to share a bed together. just chew on that for a bit.

NO, DON'T GIVE ME THEM SITTING ON A BUS

GIVE ME WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THEY HAD TO SLEEP IN THE SAME FREAKING BED IMMEDIATELY AFTER THEY MADE OUT

👀

(they made out last night btw)

(just in case anyone forgot)

(and then they had to share a bed)

ass x7

also zo is fully just not doing anything lmao

everyone's pushing with all their might and zo is just 🧍‍♂️

FUIWEBSDGIOUVEWJBOGD

oh the desperate thigh grab

yeah, im with him on this, they need to talk about it. especially about how they had to slEEP IN THE SAME FREAKING BED AFTER THAT

welp. I guess joke's day was just ruined in a slap to the face disguised as a few words

AND THE WAY HE TAKES HIS HAND OFF ZO'S THIGH AFTER THAT????? OUCHHHH

I must say tho, this is really giving episode-6-of-bad-buddy

its very patpran-post-rooftop-kiss-core

the vibes be gay and yearning and very very sad

OKAY, THE MOTHER, FINALLY

a few things to say about her

1. she's gorgeous

2. DAMN she is SHORT

3. I was rewatching the first four episodes yesterday and today because I could, and I noticed in the first episode, zo asked his friends to not tag him in photos they took at the bar, because "I don't want my mum to see"

but my question is... why? he's just out drinking with friends, he's an adult, he's not being irresponsible or anything, so why doesn't he want her to see the photos?

is it something to do with what his mum thinks of him? is she overbearing? does she have high expectations of him? does she kinda suck?

she's probably lovely though, and ill end up adding her to my list-of-fictional-parents-to-get-adopted-by (it's a very long list)

I guess we shall find out today as the episode progresses

oh, honey, you're so queer

the amount of times ive done exactly this

she's so short its hilarious omg

also: ive decided I love his mum

she's so sweet

and neither of them know how to use a stove and I think that's so hilarious and endearing

HSDHSHFSHDHHS

(also: this scene is making me think of akkayan at aye's house having a meal with his mum and rhbgdhjgb)

he's putting two and two together

the few braincells he has that aren't dedicated to debating are whirring in his mind

I can practically hear his thoughts

"he kissed me back... he wants to talk about the kiss... we went on two dates together at his suggestion... he showed up at my house and charmed my mother... he says I have secret admirers..." cmon sweetie youre so close

"WAIT, DOES HE LIKE ME?" omg honeybun you did it!

or maybe he didn't do it

maybe he was still shuffling the pieces in his brain but hadn't put them together and then his mum said something and distracted him

either way: that was hilarious and I want to high five dunk for his acting there

HIGH EXPECTATIONS, I KNEW IT

still love her tho

high expectations suck but she seems wonderful so far (obviously my opinion will change if the circumstances do (like if it turns out she completely sucks) but for now she's made it to the adoption list)

brb, gonna go cry real quick

well now their thumbs are making out

you see, I understand the things he's saying. and I honestly agree with him. if I were ever somehow put in his position, id probably say the same things.

HOWEVER, I just want my bl boys to kiss again and be happy and together and I appreciate the realism over the usual fantasy kinda situation we go for in bls, but I just want them to kissssss

this is very good advice

I hope that jokezo kiss again this episode

also AAAGBRDHFKBG JENGPOK CRUMBS

YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO'S LOSING THEIR MIND OVER JENGPOK AGAIN

BERIUFDJKGBEORPVFD

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

SHUT UP

SHUT UP SHUT UP

IM NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING

FHEWSDGFVESDV

THIS IS TOO FUNNY

im gonna start crying soon

its so funny

help me

girl is worried

I know this is what jeng told you to do but is during debate club really the right moment

im so certain that she ships it

awwhhhhh

HE SAID IT

HE SAID THE THING

AAAAAAAAA

hell yeah

GOUERJLHDGOBIERVLDNF

AAAAAAAAAAA

IM SCREAMING

THATS IT??

THAT'S THE END OF THE EPISODE??

THEY DIDNT EVEN KISS

OR ADDRESS THE FACT THAT - and I can't stress this enough - THEY SLEPT IN THE SAME FREAKING BED AFTER FULL-ASS MAKING OUT

omg next episode is gonna be amazing

I can't wait

gekjrdsbfd I love them so much

im like 70% certain they're gonna kiss next episode so fingers crossed

ALSO NITA DEFINITELY SHIPS IT

anyway. that was good. I should go to sleep now

[sushisocks]

since sean was the first to die(rip king😔), we never rly saw him deal w the death of the other members. how do you think a situation like that would go and who's death would impact him the most?

Oooh boy, what a great question!! 

So, I do think Sean would feel obligated to keep things light, but we also KNOW that he’s the one that likes to remember people and talk about the ones he cared for. I can 100% see him being the main push for letting people feel grief in a safe manner; Sean would be the one sitting at the campfire telling funny and heartwarming stories about the dead person, and encouraging other people to open up and share stories too.

At the same time, I 100% see him being weighed down HEAVY by certain deaths in private. If he survived past Arthur’s death, for example, that would absolutely rock his world. Same with Lenny’s death; if not from a shipping perspective, simply because Lenny is the youngest gun, is smart, and a friend of Sean’s. I think that would put some things in perspective for him real quick, and internally he’d be having a REAL bad time. Thing is, Sean isn’t really one to show a whole lot of negativity, so I don’t think this would be apparent to anyone who didn’t know how to look for it.

Additionally, I do genuinely think both Kieran and Molly’s deaths would hit him HARD. I’ve talked with several friends now about how Sean, Molly, and Kieran do all three have a connection with Ireland, and probably did feel a faint sense of kinship over it. Molly feeling unsafe and more alone after both Sean and Kieran dying right after one another makes a world of sense, even if she wasn’t really close to either of them, simply because of what they represent to one another. I can imagine her death hitting Sean in a similar way, and Kieran’s death would also absolutely sour certain things for him – ESPECIALLY since if you get all their possible interactions over the course of Horseshoe & Clemens Point, the two DO actually develop a repertoire between one another. 

Hosea’s death is a rough one, I think. Sean and Hosea’s relationship is of great interest to me, because there’s a LOT of conflict there, and Hosea is definitely among the– Less kind gang members, to Sean. Still though, Sean does clearly have some regard for Hosea as a wiser older man, as shown by him actually asking Hosea about their situation, clearly seeking advice and/or comfort regarding it. In large part I think Hosea’s death would be somewhat overshadowed by Lenny’s, to Sean at least, but there would very much be a sense of… Indignation, maybe? The context of this being one of the founding members of the gang, Dutch’s partner in crime, this voice of authority, now dead for what? 

Sean, at his core, is a people person. There’s no way any of the deaths wouldn’t leave an impression.

One thing I can then see happening is… A sort of disillusionment for Sean, when it comes to Dutch & the gang? Imagine all these rapid rate deaths of people you care about, and when you look to your leader he doesn’t really… Do or say anything? About it?? 

I think, similarly to my reasoning as to why I think Sean would’ve sided with Arthur in the end had he gotten that far, Sean isn’t as fully sold on every aspect of Dutch’s talk nor as fully invested as Arthur and John are (with their specific daddy issues lmfao). That WOULD allow Sean to grow more critical, and as more people die, I can imagine us actually getting to see Sean possibly become more– Well, for a lack of a better word, more Arthur-like. “He’s just a younger version of you” and all that, here’s Sean at around the same age Arthur was when he lost Eliza and Isaac, watching people that matter to him die through a failure of leadership, if you will. It makes sense to me that Sean would start harboring a similar sense of anger, that would probably start grounding him a bit more. 

This is all obviously assuming that Sean survives and everything happens the exact same way, which, as I’ve talked about before, I think is extremely unlikely! But it’s an interesting thought experiment for sure!!

Thank you so much for this question!! I enjoyed writing this a lot, and Sean’s potential journey in the story when surviving his scripted death has always been a point of deep fascination to me, so I LOVE getting to think abt stuff like this!!!

[animehouse-moe]

Skip and Loafer Episode 5: Prickly and Giddy

Five episodes in and we're already at the sports festival. Five episodes in and our characters are already so diverse and multi-faceted. Five episodes in and we're still finding new things to explore within the school setting. And five episodes in and Mitsumi is still our guide rather than our lead. Sure, this episode ultimately ends up about her, but the lead this episode is undoubtedly Egashira, who we begin to unravel more and more.

So to start, maybe a backstory? Egashira is very much the girl that many might have pegged her as with the movie episode, thanks to how the story approaches her. However, this episode dives deeper into it and presents more of the proper side of Egashira than just her negative thoughts that shape how we as viewers approach her.

Egashira was a chubby kid growing up, she wasn't in the greatest shape ever and she wasn't really ever that popular. Her experience in school led her towards anxiety and, as is common throughout this story, intense outward pressure from society which she in turn internalizes. It's not some special story, but the aim was never for it to be like that, it's meant to be a story that many girls around the world are able to relate to. Forcing yourself to give up the foods you like, to do things you never really wanted to. Learning and essentially studying how to look pretty, how to put makeup on, how to do things that boys will like.

I will say though, it walks a somewhat fine line. It's hard, it's really hard and I do give them credit for the positivity their message exudes. The challenge being, you can't turn back time. You can't remove those core experiences of a little girl being forced to refuse the things she likes, dedicating so much of her time to finding a way to be "popular" and "liked". The best case scenario would be to wash away those experiences, but at the very least Skip and Loafer is taking a realistic approach. Mitsumi can't remove those pieces of Egashira, but she can reaffirm what rests at the center: her dedication. Egashira deserves the credit for battling through those experiences to be accepted within society and achieve the status she desired. And Mitsumi does a wonderful job with that in this clip here.

It's funny, it's light, and it doesn't cut right to the issue. It's not Mitsumi speaking directly to Egashira's heart, it's Mitsumi being the adorable little oddball that's come in to shake up everybody's high school life. Egashira is the one that connects the dots, and I think it makes for a far stronger moment. She resented Mitsumi, no matter how she may word it. She loathed that Mitsumi could be herself and be accepted.

But she doesn't hate her, and that's what allows this moment to happen. She's jealous, but not so much against Mitsumi as to not hear her words and have them cut through that thick exterior.

It's really just incredibly wonderful, because it's such a great message to put out there. There's people that will be accepted as they are, and people that will have to fight for that acceptance. There's people that have had different experience than you in the world, and that shapes how they approach things. The country girl doesn't have anything on the city girl in terms of expectation and experience, but that naivety can make a world of difference in accepting and appreciating what the other's gone through to get to where they are.

And differences are something that this story is really hammering home with Mitsumi and Egashira. Even simple things end up creating space between them like which pair of shoes each remembers from the little altercation in the gym.

It's such a simple moment, but it speaks volumes to Egashira's character. She's forever unsatisfied with herself because she can't be herself, and when she is herself, she chastises those pieces like we see here. Even in just the small actions like balling her fist or how she talks, Egashira has a lot to overcome to accept herself. In that sense, I really feel like she's the opposite/rival to Mitsumi. There's more and more to unravel, and as we do the pair grow closer.

Now, there's a bunch more I could go on and on about between this duo, but I'm going to speed along to direction! I think there's certainly good pieces that place a focus on body parts to convey emotion, but past that it leans into a more typical sports festival feel. I wouldn't say it's bad, considering what all we get, but I was hoping for a bit more.

Thankfully, the good sequences are really good, and we've got quite a few of them! Like this little piece of Egashira walking down the hallway and Mitsumi catching up to her. It really speaks volumes to the strides that the two have taken as friends, and that Mitsumi is unwilling to let Egashira further isolate herself in the pursuit of social acceptance.

Or even simple pieces like this little dandelion that's used to show how much time has passed in practicing for the Sports Festival. Impressively enough, I'm having a really hard time deciding whether or not this is CGI. It feels like it has that depth, but at the same time it blends so ridiculously well with its surroundings that I'm unsure.

Speaking of CGI, I feel like a lot of the CGI cuts from this episode are really solid. Stuff like this volleyball are missing a lot of the weight that 2D animation can ascribe to it, but overall it's well composited within the scene.

And there's pieces like this basketball net. It certainly stands out more, but for how well it's done I can appreciate it, really nice movement on the mesh, and there's even a bit of movement to the rim. Some people may not like the concession of 3D for such a short scene, but in my opinion it's more than well enough done to be justified.

Now, where P.A Works really shines with their 3D work is in the environments. Their compositing is really really well done to the point that you wouldn't even blink twice at it when it's the focal point of the scene, like this one. Though, the giveaway is how the camera moves so smoothly through it, it's too well done for it to be 2D, so if you're paying attention it's a sort of process of elimination for it.

Now, I'm not here to just talk 3D, there's some really great 2D scenes as well, like this very intense volleyball cut!

Alright alright that's the last of it. This episode was probably the weakest in terms of direction, because it was so straightforward and didn't really have a super strong vision it wanted to follow, but it's far from bad. There's still a lot of Deai's vision in it with the wider and more full shots, and there's also pieces from the episode director that allow them to call it their own. Alongside that, they do a really great job conveying Egashira's story this episode, so much so to the point that I feel like they could have gone even more over the top and emotional with it.

But, at the end of the day, it's another great episode for a great series, that contains some really great messages and sentiments that are important to high school age people. Continually impressive, and constantly inspiring.

[acourtofthought]

And as a side note, my own theory is that you want to connect Lucien to Gwydion because you realise how important Truth-Teller and Gwydion/Starsword (and the prophecy) will be in future ACOTAR books, including Elain’s.

Especially knowing that the weapons likely tie into the Dusk Court, which Elain herself is connected to. There are three sister peaks in Prythian: UTM, which Feyre conquered, Ramiel, which Nesta conquered, and the Prison Island mountain… left for Elain. As I’m sure you know, the Prison Island mountain is the Dusk Court.

Then let’s recall how SJM described the scene where Azriel gives Elain Truth-Teller:

“Elain looked up at Azriel, their eyes meeting, his hand still lingering on the hilt of the blade. I saw the painting in my mind: the lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. Standing before Death, shadows and terrors lurking over his shoulder. Light and dark, the space between their bodies a blend of the two. The only bridge of connection … that knife.”

Light and dark… is dusk.

Elain and Azriel are the two characters most connected to the Dusk Court (aside from Bryce)… not Gwyn or Lucien.

Sure, that could change, but with CC3 dropping soon… I doubt it 🤭

And here it is, if it's not a Bryce and Az shipper it's an Elriel.

You realize what SJM is saying with that scene right?

Elain is Spring and blooming LIFE, Az is Death and the ONLY thing connecting them is that knife in that moment, which she then gave back and didn't look back. They have nothing in common, that is what the author is telling us. Why would Elain have ANYTHING to do with a sword when SJM made it clear she doesn't like weapons and cruelty bothers her? YOU are rewriting her character completely and that's so extremely strange to me. I'm guessing you only like Elain if she becomes the K-Mart version of her already warrior sisters and Nesta's already warrior friends. There's a reason neither Nesta or Elain showed interest in learning to fight in ACOWAR yet only one sister agreed to wear the leathers and took a weapon without convincing. That my friend, was a clue. Did you read TOG? Did you take note how Yrene was able to remain a healer without becoming a sword wielding warrior?

It's extremely funny how in your last post you went hard-core on me taking the sword away from Bryce for Lucien while you're fine with it if it ends up with Elain and Az 🤔

Your version of Elain in Dusk with a sword / dagger to be Az's match is proof she doesn't match Az as she is, she'd have to sacrifice parts of herself. You're turning her into the one who is already hinted at being his mate.

Words, what are you doing in my mouth?! (ahhh, you put them there).

Gwydion is not hugely important aside from what it represents to the fae and their history, I'm not sure why you're assuming I think it's the key to the future of the series. Truth be told, I rarely think much about Gwydion because it's one sword out of many and SJM never makes a single weapon the savior of all (most of my theories were about Az giving TT to Bryce though I'm not sure I see that happening anymore).

To me, Gwydion is still just a sword just as Ataraxia is still just a sword.

Nesta is not powerful because of the sword she has just like Bryce is not powerful whether or not she keeps Gwydion just like the one who gets Gwydion isn't going to be the most special of all.

Sure these are Made weapons and yes they will be important in battle, just like if they call Narben from the sea but do they really and truly need them when they all have magic and can just destroy people with blasts of magic? When they have the mask and the crown?

Lucien doesn't necessarily need Gwydion to be powerful, he commanded Cassian with a single word (just like Az doesn't need TT and TT alone to save anyone). Not to mention Lucien already has a pretty fancy collection of weapons (remember the jeweled one? I wonder where he got it... hmmmm, maybe family heirlooms? Ones not stolen by a certain queen and general?)

These weapons are simply relics of their history and while they are meaningful because they were weapons that are what their ancestors used long ago, I doubt SJM will write it so her heros and heroines are worthless without them. That only the people with made swords are the important ones. SJM typically gives even the unlikeliest of her characters big roles in the war (Yrene anyone?).

Fionn didn't win the war single handedly with Gwydion. Also, Ataraxia is made as Gwydion was made. So based on your logic that Gwydion is the key to everything...... Why? Gwydion is almost redundant at this point. It's not really about it being one of its kind anymore so much as what it represented to the fae in Prythian millennia ago.

The big difference is that Gwydion does not have the dark history of Narben or even the fact that Ataraxia was made with Nesta's death powers, it's a saviors light and I'm sorry but if you think that means Az deserves it or your dark version of Elain deserves it ..... 😬

Gwydion, "savior's light", and fun fact, Lucien's name means "light" and SJM has made it a point to reference Lucien's "goodness" on a few occasions.

Az not caring whether he kills an ally doesn't really strike me as someone who would be granted a sword dubbed "savior's light".

That's once again assigning characteristics to characters who don't fit the profile.

I'm sure all these made weapons will eventually be used in battle, that Narben will also make a reappearance but I think you're putting way too much on Gwydion being the most important thing ever.

Just like Captain America's shield isn't the main thing that makes him him, it just completes the imagery.

Just like Thors hammer wasn't the source of his power but a way to channel it which he learned how to do without it.

I wasn't desperate to connect Lucien to Gwydion because I strongly feel Lucien is going to be High King during the war with or without it, I've always thought that.

I don't think Lucien is going to rule over all the courts, simply unite them during war.

This all came about a few days ago when I was chatting with a friend and had a random thought which is what spun my wheels:

I was messing around and joking with someone and I turned it into a "crazy theory" which I admitted.

And Lucien is actually more connected to dusk than Elain considering Helions connection to the Mask, and the fact that he owns the Pegasus which are originally from the Dusk Court. Helion is his father so.....

Considering Elain's scent is a promise of Spring and Spring had been MADE for someone like her, I'd say you are the one trying to fit the square peg into the round hole with Elain now being connected to the Dusk Court in any way that means she belongs there.

And the Dusk Court is THE PRISON. WHY OH WHY are people convinced there's going to be homes and a city suddenly built up on this land in the very next book?! Something like that would take time. 😂. And Az can't even talk to people outside the IC, he would honestly be the worst ruler ever and that's no shade to Az, he's got his strengths. But let's be for real. He likes his space and his shadows and he doesn't play well with others.

P.s. To your other post, I'm not sure why you keep choosing to ignore that Fionn is known for his heroic deeds. Again, any connection to leading the wild hunt in his lore (where he wasn't even the bad guy) is not something that makes him a monster in acotar just like Rhys isn't actually Hades kidnapping a bride of spring. SJM is using the imagery and loose ideas, not everything is a perfect match. You have to know that by now instead of acting like all pieces line up as a perfect match.

"Mythological HEROS"

Heros are the good guys, just in case you're confused

In Blodeuwedd, the guy that would be Az's character ends up murdered for what he did wrong to Lleu (Lucien). Does that make Az the bad guy in ACOTAR?

And once again:

“I rode in the Wild Hunt before you were even a scrap of existence, witch from Oorid. I summoned the hounds and the world cowered at their baying. I galloped at the head of the Hunt, and Fae and beast bowed before us.”

Lanthys told us he rode at the head of the Hunt and Fae bowed before him

You have a nice day now! Really looking forward to seeing your reaction after CC3 and the next ACOTAR book 😁

[the-art-of-sanshoku]

Manga Recommendations from Things I Read in 2023

I wanted to make an end of the year post highlighting things I read last year and want others to know about! I tried focusing on manga that don't have anime adaptions (although a few of these are getting ones soon) and covering a variety of genres. Anyway, let's get right into it with:

Ikoku Nikki (Tomoko Yamashita)

Status: Complete, 54 Chapters, unlicensed - complete fan translation (Note: When I say something is licensed or not this only refers to having an English release.)

Genre: Josei, SOL, Drama

Synopsis: After the loss of her parents, 15 year old Asa finds herself in the custody of her aunt Makio Koudai. Makio, the introverted novelist, has no experience with children but will do what she can for Asa.

While this isn’t an ordered list I will start with what is probably my favorite manga I read this year. Ikoku Nikki is a very cathartic read for me as there are a lot of adult characters who are just trying to figure things out (although this also applies to the teen characters, but it’s just more relatable with the characters closer to my age). Figuring out how to like yourself even when you don’t fit to society's “norms”, figuring out how to process traumas from growing up that still affect you well into your 20s and 30s and beyond, figuring out how to love others, figuring out who “you” even are.  And it’s written and worded so lovely and deliberately that sometimes it says something and just puts into words a feeling you’ve had for forever but were never able to express and all of a sudden it just makes sense.

The cast is diverse and I think everyone can find someone to relate to. There are neurodiverse characters, and characters that widely spread the LGBTQIA + spectrum. But they don’t feel trope-y or anything, they’re just well fleshed out and well realized people. Ikoku Nikki just has a very “understanding” vibe that is just comforting to read and be seen by media. In a way it was a little of a life changing (life affirming?) read for me and I highly recommend it to anyone, and I pray it gets an official English release in the future so I can add it to my collection and support the author properly.

Tenkaichi: Nihon Saikyou Bugeisha Ketteisen (Yousuke Nakamaru & Kyoutarou Azuma)

Status: Releasing, 32 Chapters, unlicensed - ongoing fan translation

Genre: Action, Battle Royale, Seinen

Synopsis: 16 historical figures participate in a grandiose tournament of 1v1 battles to determine Nobunaga’s successor

On the opposite end of the manga spectrum we have Tenkaichi, which is just a very fun read. And sometimes I feel kind of crazy how little I’ve seen this talked about online by anyone, as it’s a super quality battle manga. It feels like a manga written by battle manga lovers for battle manga lovers, and in the author’s notes you can see this to be true. They love unpredictable battles with over the top powers and larger than life characters and they deliver. Tenkaichi lacks a “main character” so every fight feels like either side could win and I have even been surprised by a few outcomes of the battles. And even without a main character, the characters that exist are just super cool and easy to pick one to root for. They also usually become a bit more fleshed out via backstories so they’re not super shallow either. The art, paneling, and character designs are also really good, if you like fighting manga at all check this out.

Medalist (Ikada Tsuruma)

Status: Releasing, 36 Chapters, licensed 

Genre: Sports, Drama, Seinen

Synopsis: A cinnamon roll coach and his cinnamon roll student aim to make her a gold medalist level skater

Medalist is a classic underdog story that is really elevated by its superb main characters and art. Inori and Tsukasa are a very silly and endearing duo, but are also incredibly dedicated and hardworking that make them impossible not to root for. Their relationship and belief in each other really forms the core of the manga. The art can be really funny with silly faces, but also really intense and beautiful to capture the figure skating and emotions of the skaters pouring their blood, sweat, and tears into their work. Each competition feels really thrilling and has you on the edge of your seat, and it does a good job of getting into the specifics of the scoring so you can follow along. It’s inspirational in the way that great sports manga are, it just makes you want to work hard to become someone you can be proud of.

Souboutei Kowasubeshi (Kazuhiro Fujita)

Status: Complete, 250 Chapters, unlicensed - complete fan translation

Genre: Supernatural, Horror, Action, Shounen

Synopsis: A lovecraftian mansion poses a threat to Japan. To handle this, a team of supernatural/paranormal/spiritual experts are sent in along with - a scrungly artist?

Kazuhiro Fujita is a mangaka that I feel is super underrated in the west. Despite getting anime adaptations of 2 of his works in Ushio to Tora and Karakuri Circus (although the Karakuri adaption was not the best unfortunately), I feel that these were overlooked and he doesn’t really get talked about. Which is a shame because I think he’s a really great mangaka. He’s been around since the 90’s, and you can tell through his artstyle and storytelling style. Despite Souboutei coming out in 2016 it still feels very old school shounen, but this isn’t a bad thing at all. Fujita’s manga are full of heart and his artwork really exaggerates faces and body language to communicate the character’s feelings. I like his manga a lot because from the start it will often tell you “the big bad” and the whole manga will build up this antagonist until a satisfying end and climax. It doesn’t introduce new threats, or powerscale indefinitely, or pad its runtime with unnecessary filler, it starts - brings you through an emotional rollercoaster of twists and turns - and then ends.

Souboutei is no different in this regard. It builds and builds on the primary antagonist (in this case the mansion of Souboutei) and its mysteries to make a journey full of intrigue where you want to keep turning the page to find out more. The mansion is also a great setting that becomes a character in its own right, a twisting labyrinth full of malice and various horrors. Fujita also always makes a unique cast of characters with varied motivations, ages, character designs, and abilities that make each memorable and likeable. Fujita also likes to make every little detail count and sometimes add to the main plot where you least expect. Being a shounen there’s also plenty of action, and his battles feel creative and the abilities are inventive to make for some exciting fights. Souboutei has a bonus for the main character being an artist and having large themes on passion and creation and “what is art” that gave me an extra layer of enjoyment. Also it must be said that Sakamaki Deido would totally be a hit as a tumblr sexyman if this manga had any fanbase at all. But whether you read Souboutei or one of his other works, I hope you give Fujita a try.

Rojica to Rakkasei (Kinome)

Status: Complete, 25 Chapters, unlicensed - has complete fan translation

Genre: Fantasy, Comedy, SOL, Seinen

Synopsis: The titular characters Rojica and Rakka spend wacky days in their wacky world.

Rojica to Rakkasei is a breath of fresh air with a fantasy world that’s just plain weird and unique. A lot of manga fantasy lately feel like derivative goblins and dragons and slimes type worlds in medieval european-esque settings. Not Rojica though, it kind of feels almost like surreal and absurdist manga, but doesn’t go quite that far so it’s easier to follow as a series of episodic adventures. It’s a short, creative read that I enjoyed from start to finish. 

Witch Hat Atelier (Kamome Shirahama)

Status: Releasing, 74 Chapters, licensed

Genre: Fantasy, Adventure, Drama, SOL, Seinen

Synopsis: In this world there are people born as witches who can wield magic to help others. Or at least that’s what the world is made to think. After one fateful day, ordinary girl Coco, will learn the truth behind magic and become a witch apprentice.

Speaking of refreshing fantasy worlds, Witch Hat Atelier is a wonderful manga with great worldbuilding and setting. The “magic system” used in the manga is unique and feels very naturally woven into the world and society. This magic is harshly regulated and has many rules of its use, but Witch Hat Atelier lives by the creed “restrictions breed creativity” to create interesting solutions to difficult scenarios. The characters are delightful, focusing more on a younger cast of aspiring and bright girls who aim to become witches proper. Their struggles to make a magic unique to them and find their own voice in society make them a relatable bunch. Kamome Shirahama’s artsyle and paneling is also to die for, I love just looking at this manga. This manga isn’t all just school life and rainbows though, there’s a dark undercurrent to the story in the form of the antagonists the “Brim Hats” that bring some extra excitement and thrill to the story as well.  Just a brilliant manga. Also the only manga with my little meow meow Qifrey

Orb: On the Movements of the Earth (Uoto)

Status: Complete, 62 Chapters, recently licensed

Genre: Historical, Drama, Seinen

Synopsis: We’re studying heliocentrism! But it’s the 1400s…

A manga that really touched me on its themes of legacy, and passing knowledge down to new generations. This manga focuses on the secret studies of those who look at the stars and dare to challenge the current knowledge of the world. It takes place in Poland, which is a rather unique setting, in the 1400s. The constant threat of the inquisitors is felt at all times and our characters are left to question if this pursuit of knowledge is worth the weight of risk. What is the worth of my life? What is my purpose? What does it mean to be fulfilled? Philosophical, romantic (in a literary sense), and profound, this manga stands out among the crowd.

Futari Ashita mo Sorenari ni (Suzuyuki)

Status: Complete, 87 Chapters, recently licensed

Genre: Romance, Comedy, SOL, Seinen

Synopsis: Long term couple moves in together - fluff ensues

This is likely my favorite romance manga as it is one of the few to depict fluffy domestic life with your partner. Finding manga that deal with established relationships can be hard, but to find one about a healthy romance where the characters just live together and love each other and feel like adults and not the blushy “oooh she h-hh-holding my hand??” teenager mentality is a super fresh and nice thing to read (although I like those kinds of romances too, it’s just a bit oversaturated of a market comparatively). It’s a feel good romcom SOL with pretty much zero drama which some people may not like, but it had me grinning from ear to ear like a madman the whole time. If you like cute domestic fluff it’s a must read. Doesn’t overstay its welcome and has a great ending.

I have some more manga I want to talk about, but this post is pretty long so there will maybe be a part 2 ^.^