#punisher me

[spamton]

i accidentally napped and had a dream (nightmare?) where a new update for stardew valley released where everything was the same except on a random day in year 3 Evelyn would just straight up die. There was a whole cutscene that started in her house where she collapsed, and then transitioned over to the hospital where Harvey gave George and Alex the worst news of their lives. However, they got to speak to her where she said something along the lines of "Yoba will protect me, and I am sure he will let me watch over you."

Alex and George would not talk to the player for more than a few words for a full season after this event. George would spend most of his time in the bedroom, so if you had less than 2 hearts with him, you could barely ever speak to him.

And Alex... oh my god, poor Alex. If you were married to him during this event, he just stayed in bed all day. Otherwise, if single, he would just stand on the beach most of the time, staring off into the ocean. If you tried to interact with him, it would just say "Alex is grieving... Better leave him be."

There was also other NPC dialogue like mayor Lewis saying "I haven't seen the community in this state of mourning since your grandfather passed..."

there was also a glitch where you could make Evelyn live forever and there were entire guides for the "immortal Evelyn glitch" that got patched out in the next update. If you tried to perform the glitch after the patch, mr. Qi would tell you that "hey, it happens to all of us. We can't prevent it, and neither can you, no matter how hard you try."

[sepublic]

[lotus-pear]

he’s begging kuni to let them eat pancakes for dinner

[virtualplushy]

one important thing that Must be understood about interpersonal relationships is that you have to stop interacting with people who love you like they’re one slip-up away from leaving you. you have to trust that the ppl you love mean what they say. you have to believe that when they say “this hurt my feelings,” that they’re also saying, “can you please love me this other way next time?” and you have to wrap your head around the fact that even if you don’t understand Why someone loves you, you can accept that that they do. true, honest, & open love does not function like hp in a video game !!!!!!

[zhukzucraft]

doc "i'm not a baby" m77

[kiwiandmint]

ORV doodle dump ✨

[thecmaly]

really? right in front of my karaage?

-

more windbreaker comics

[killershrike]

Okay, but imagine a human giving their yautja lover a lemon for the first time. the yautja just chews the entire lemon whole, and you instantly burst out with laughter, causing your love to narrow their eyes in suspicion. But before they can question you, their entire face scrunches into disgust and mild horror. They can't spit it out because to waste a gift from you would be to dishonour their mate. So they're forced to chew through the intense foreign feeling, unable to stop their manibiles from clacking visciously in displeasure. You can't stop giggling, eyes watering as you have to cover your mouth to keep from bellowing laughter. Your yautja certainly doesn't find it as funny.

When they finish the nasty fruit they growl at you. "Ooman knew what would happen. Tricky ooman." And they reach out to pull you into their chest. "Will show you what happens when little ooman plays tricks." Their growl in your ear is seductive and makes you shudder instinctively.

You're already wondering how they would react to a lime next.

[koobiie]

i love boys in a car simulator

the first pic is a redraw of an in-game selfie! here's the original:

[moonyflesh]

dating Logan Howlett would include…

WARNINGS: smutty. p in v, oral sex, fingering, breeding kink, orgasm teasing/control, mentions of aggressive/risky sex, (language, obviously), etc. - [🔞]

CHARACTERS: James “Logan” Howlett (MARVEL/X-MEN/WOLVERINE)

🐾 .*.. 🩹

- possessive smacks on the ass when you pass him in the hall.

- all talk, but no bite (he would never actually hurt you).

- routine scalp massages (on both ends), usually ending in you both being passed out on the other’s bed.

- having to label what food is yours, or he will eat it.

- constantly scolding him for his chapped lips…where he continuously looses the chapsticks you graciously lend him (he always buys you more).

- playful banter that usually ends with you bent over whatever flat surface is nearby.

- having to get used to loud chewing. i mean, it’s Logan. what do you expect?

- not much physical show of affection in public- that’s reserved for behind closed doors. (an occasional press of his lips to your forehead, or his hand on the small of your back is as far as he’s willing to put on display for the student’s prying eyes).

- thriving off of each other’s warmth at night- tangled up in each other under some thin duvet.

- country, bluegrass, and old as fuck music. don’t you dare even think about turning on “that shitty music you like so much” around him.

- being turned on by your makeup on him in some way— lipstick prints smeared along the collar of his white t-shirt- your mascara running down your face and smearing onto his fingers when he wipes it off.

- (^) just you making an absolute mess on him in general. he fucking loves it.

- needing to take sharp intakes of breath in between his kisses, since he physically can hold his breath for much longer than the “average mutant”.

- rough, meaningful sex. there is no such thing as a ‘quickie’ in his book. he wants to savor your moments of vulnerability.

- more teeth than tongue. he wants to feel how you squirm under him when his canines sink into your lips, shoulders, and inner thighs.

- (^) lovebites and hickeys. you’re not allowed to leave the house unless there’s something that’s marking you as taken. as his.

- wearing his clothes when he’s gone for long periods of time.

- long motorcycle rides, usually at night. (he makes you wear a helmet and plenty of protective leather, much to his enjoyment).

- soaking in your scent. he always knows when your needy. he can smell it on you.

- oh, and he smells like cedar wood and pine. Maybe a bit of cigar smoke- his natural sweat smell he can’t seem to get rid of? Something Iike that.

- (^) him going absolutely feral when he can smell himself on you- his cologne, cigars- just his general aura on you is such a massive turn on for him.

- lots of loving nips and kisses, though. constantly has his lips pressed against the nape of your neck or crown of your skull.

- sleeps with you in his arms. no way in hell you’re allowed to wake up before him.

- face sitting. he wants every pound of you on his mouth and nose, his arms wrapped up and around your thighs, pushing your cunt into his tongue.

- wanting to feel good too. no matter how hard he’s been going down on you, he wants release, too.

- praise. lots of shrewd language and name-calling.

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

“fuck, that’s my good fucking girl- you’re doing so good, sweetheart- so pretty all sweaty and wet cuzzah’ me, huh?”

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

- face fucking. he’ll stop no matter how close he is to his peak if you need him to, but he wants it so far down your throat. and you better swallow every last drop.

- breeding kink? idk i just feel like he’s super into seeing you carry his kid (only when you’re ready, though. he of all people knows what a big deal pregnancy is).

- decent aftercare. he at least puts some amount of effort into it; probably brings you a glass of lukewarm water, a damp towel from his bathroom, maybe one of his t-shirts if he thinks of it.

- expect to wait a while for him to say “i love you” back. he’s been hurt. too many times. he loves you, he breathes you, he craves you. he just doesn’t know if he’s ready to actually admit that to himself yet, let alone to you.

[ot3]

i don't care how much of a cliche it may be there's nothing i eat up more than a well-written character who has a good heart and strong morals but will become sickeningly violent when pushed too far

[darlingshane]

thirsty tongue thursday 👅

[deepseasmetro]

something that the does it like women blog that ive found really interesting are the number of people who think "bad things happen to a woman" to mean "it does not like that woman". especially if the author or creator so happens to be a man

and i mean, like, in many cases that's true, especially when the bad things are excessive violence that other characters dont face, but i just find it interesting that for some select people there doesnt seem to be much thought beyond that. to them, if a man writes a woman who experiences violence or hardship, its misogynistic. i just find that interesting

[thesugarjar]

You always look so cute on your knees for me. But you’ve been bad haven’t you? 😘

[sav3yee]

Just so yall know, whenever I say "oh they're just a silly little guy!!!" what I actually mean is "I'm aware of all of the atrocities they've committed, and all of the depth and nuance that they hold, and I love them for it" ok? Ok. Now let me enjoy my silly little guys they are so silly

[lil-kitten-space]

Bad girls need a discipline. Naughty girls need a punishment