#pumpkin twizzle

[ponydoodles]

how about all three

[rosalie-starfall]

I’m bored so I’ll just answer all of these

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Coffee Mugs

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? Chocolate 

3. bubblegum or cotton candy? Neither

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? literally a conversation I had with my 2nd Grade Teacher 

Teacher “Kayla, you talk back to much”

Kayla ��I do not Talk Back!”

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Soda Bottles 

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? Tomboy Preppy Boho Goth?

7. earbuds or headphones? Earbuds

8. movies or tv shows? Both

9. favorite smell in the summer?

10. game you were best at in p.e.? Dance

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? Coffee and cereal or a granola bar or toast

12. name of your favorite playlist? The Witching Hour, or my Island Life Playlist

13. lanyard or key ring? Lanyard

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? Twizzles or Red Vines

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? Of Mice and Men

16. most comfortable position to sit in? With my legs to the side or crossed under me

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? My sketchers

18. ideal weather? Overcast but warm with no wind or snow maybe a tiny bit of rain and some fog!

19. sleeping position? on my stomach

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? PC

21. obsession from childhood? I Dream of Jeannie and The Nanny

22. role model? Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Maya Rudolph, Julia Louis Dreyfus, Carol Burnett, Carrie Fisher, 

23. strange habits? None that I can think of.

24. favorite crystal? Rose Quartz and Onyx 

25. first song you remember hearing? Walkin on Broken Glass

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? Drink at a patio bar

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? Drink by a fire

28. five songs to describe you? Different Drum by the stone ponies 

29. best way to bond with you? Over Middle Aged Actresses and Fictional Characters

30. places that you find sacred? My Grandma’s Rose Garden Growing up, Disneyland

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? Dock Martins, Dark Blue Jeans, Black Off the Shoulder loose fit Tee

32. top five favorite vines? Red?

33. most used phrase in your phone? IDK literally 

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? Thankfully I don’t have any

35. average time you fall asleep? Around Midnight

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? I honestly have no clue. Maybe the Star trek Engage photo?

37. suitcase or duffel bag? Suitcase (But it really depends on the trip)

38. lemonade or tea? Both Arnold Palmer!!!

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? Lemon Cake

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? It was so long ago I really can’t remember anything weird happening to me

41. last person you texted? My Dad

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? Pant Pockets

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Fake Leather Jacket

44. favorite scent for soap? Pumpkin

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? If It’s Comedic I’ll Love whatever

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Birthday suit

47. favorite type of cheese? Colby Jack?

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? I have no Idea but Apples are my favorite so I’ll go with that

49. what saying or quote do you live by? If you don’t like something do something about it

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? My mom’s Flip Flop breaking at the movie theater and her trying to get out to the car. OMG even just that little summer I’m crying from laughing at the memory 

51. current stresses? Money, Covid, Politics, the world, anything and everything

52. favorite font? Open Dyslexic

53. what is the current state of your hands? Sad, dry, Scratched 

54. what did you learn from your first job? you might get free food sometimes

55. favorite fairy tale? 

56. favorite tradition? watching shows with my family on Wednesdays 

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? I don’t think I’ve overcome anything

58. four talents you’re proud of having? I’m really good at cutting men’s hair, I think I’m quite good at making gifs, I think I’m pretty good at writing (it’s something I’m working on) I can Quote Both Addams Family movies in their entirety just from hearing the musical score

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Tits

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? Like Sailor Moon?

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? “Ain’t no bitches gonna hunt no ghosts”

62. seven characters you relate to? Liz Lemon, Elaine Benes, Lavinia Dickinson, Zelda Spellman, Barbara Minerva, Shirley Feeney, Jillian Holtzmann

63. five songs that would play in your club? My heart will go on (Remix by the Math Club), Dreams by deep Dish Feat Stevie Nicks, Doin it right by Daft Punk, Shake Senora Feat T-Pain & Sean Paul, April Showers By Proleter

64. favorite website from your childhood? Pixie Hollow (online game) BTW “Website from my childhood” Is very limited we didn’t have internet until I was like 10ish

65. any permanent scars? I have a scar under my right eyebrow from Chicken Pox

66. favorite flower(s)? Poppies and Roses

67. good luck charms? I don’t have any

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? I hate fish but also just meat in general 

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? Carley Simon had terrible stage fright and couldn’t preform in front of audiences. I’m pretty sure that’s a true statement. 

70. left or right handed? Right

71. least favorite pattern? Abuse?

72. worst subject? Men and Hetero Shit

73. favorite weird flavor combo? I’m not one for weird Flavor Combos 

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? 2... I don’t fuck around. I try and get ahead of the pain

75. when did you lose your first tooth? I have no Idea

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? Fries, Skillet, and Whorehouse

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill? succulent? 

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Coffee from the Gas station 

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? School ID

80. earth tones or jewel tones? Earth Tones

81. fireflies or lightning bugs? Lightning Bugs

82. pc or console? PC

83. writing or drawing? Writing 

84. podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts

84. barbie or polly pocket? Polly Pocket

85. fairy tales or mythology? Mythology

86. cookies or cupcakes? Cookies 

87. your greatest fear? Caves, Mines, and the Ocean

88. your greatest wish? To be a writer

89. who would you put before everyone else? My siblings

90. luckiest mistake? Quitting Homeadvisor

91. boxes or bags? Boxes

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? Fairy Lights

93. nicknames? Punkin, Kayla Bean, KP, Pain

94. favorite season? Autumn 

95. favorite app on your phone? Tumblr and Instagram

96. desktop background? 

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized? 2 (My mom’s and my dad’s)

98. favorite historical era? 1930s and 1940s

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

[A6A6I5] ====>

ROZE: Dave, we were sort of 'n tha mizziddle of sum-m sum-m hizzle. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up.

DAVE: 'n tha middle of whizzat

ROZE: A sizzles of heartfelt convizzles of a personal nizzle.

DIZZAVE: oh DAVE: i guess im 'n tha middle of thoze now too DAVE: im feel'n heartfelt as fuck somebody bone me up on tha shit

ROSE: One cizzle simply be boned up on shiznit sizzle as dis. You hizzy ta be there. It dont stop till the wheels fall off.

DIZZAY: C-to-tha-izzome on

ROZE so jus' chill: Wizards, Problizzles, Feelings. It was yo' standard tizzy of twizzo estrange' mutual shot calla. ROZE: Any qizzles?

DIZZLE fo' sho': yes lots

ROZE: Ok. ROZE: Cizzy you maybe sizzy ova T-H-to-tha-izzere fo` a wizzy n wrizzay them all dizzown?

DAVE dogg: um

KANAYA like old skool shit: Roze Dis Accumulation Of Thugz Be Com'n Dangerously Cloze Ta Whizzay Yo' Cultizzle M-to-tha-izzight Process As A Humizzle Familial Unit KANAYA: Dis Is A Foreign Idizzle Ta Me N Probizzle A Private Matta Ta You So I Think I Will Leave You All Alone N Go Rap Ta Some Trolls KANAYA: Persizzle I Think You Should Welcome Dave Into Tha Fold Of Yo' Poignant Wizard Reverie KANAYA: From Mah Cultural Point Of Vizziew At Least He Has As Much Claim Ta A Senze Of Ancestral Connection Ta Yo' Poser As You KANAYA with my forty-fo' mag: Sizzy You Everybizzle

DIZZY paper'd up: yeah dawg kanaya ta tha rescue wit smizzle shizzit ta say as usual

ROZE: Uttizzle destroyed again, by ha superizzle senze of rizzle n decorum fo gettin yo pimp on. ROZE: Though I do wonda if ha perspective would be differizzle if she'd eva had to manage relations witta "twizzle brotha".

DAVE: Anotha dogg house production. ok but who cares 'bout T-H-to-tha-izzat DAVE: so roze DIZZY, ya feel me? its our mom DAVE: hizzey mom

ROXY: hi!!!

DAVE droppin hits: well not mizzle DIZZY: Aint no stoppin' this shit nigga. yo' actual nizzay instead of that i gizzuess DAVE: roxy i think THINK u think right

RIZZLE so jus' chill: mizzy ok tizzoo tho

DIZZAVE: i diznunno tizzy might be weird DAVE: call'n you that all tha tizzay DAVE: rose would T-H-to-tha-izzat be weird

ROZE ta help you tap dat ass: It would probably git a shawty weird. Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome.

DAVE: Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. so mizzy DAVE: im jizzay go'n ta jizzle right into tha fuckin fry'n pan hizzy DIZZLE: lizzike tape off a no bizzle zizzle fo` a wizzy DAVE: if thats ok

ROXY: a frying piznan 'n tha no bullshit zizzle?? ROXY: siznounds intizzle ROXY: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. whizno be mann'n dis pan n who gave him clearance fiznor tha no bs zone

DAVE: captain Serizzles be at tizzy pan n he gots the go-aheezee frizzom lieizzle Dizzy Fuckarizzle of tha Heartattack Armada

ROXY: isnt lieutenant a motherfucka rank than captain ROXY: who pizzy dis diznude 'n charge of such an important pan

DAVE: um i diznont know maybe it be? D-TO-THA-IZZAVE gangsta style: ok like its coo' that you even know that fizzle bizzy dis be exizzle tha kind of fuckery tha no bs zone doesnt cotton ta no matta what sizzorta cookware be involved or whizzle pseudomilitary organization regulates its drug deala DAVE: i jizzle have some questions 'bout you n 'bout stizzle 'n general so ratha than mumble thriznough a conversation that S-to-tha-izzounds mostly lizzle tha stuff we literally just gots done sayin, sizzy though thizzle W-to-tha-izzould be, im gonna machine gat some shizzle at you sippin' rizzound stylizzay

ROXY: a mizzle gat lightn'n rizzound 'n a frying pan! Boo-Yaa!!!!! ROXY: god.........DAMN

DAVE: i know right? DIZZAVE: so DAVE: yizzle be mah biological motha

ROXIZZLE: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome. yiznes

DAVE: n rozes

ROXY n we out! yes

DIZNAVE: n therefore bear at least partial n lizzike biologically incidental responsibility fo` why we be both so fucked up

ROXY mah nizzle: yes

DIZZAY yaba daba dizzle: but you yourself be a paradox clone

ROXY: um... i guess? You gotta check dis shit out yo.

DAVE: which M-to-tha-izzeans DAVE: yiznou dizzidnt even have bio parents DIZZLE: you originated frizzom yoself

RIZZLE: guess so to increase tha peace!

DIZNAVE: so you really dizzle have anyone ta blame fo` who yizzy be excizzle weirdly n paradoxically yoself

ROXY: um.. y cuz this is how we do it.. yizzes? ROZE, niggaz, better recognize: Dizzave.

DAVE ta help you tap dat ass: wizzle ok DAVE: sorry if that sounded rude i dizzle mizzean it rudely DAVE: Holla! i mean DIZNAVE thats off tha hook yo: you did hiznave a "parental figure" whizno you i gizzy modeled yoself after 'n a way DIZZAY: or wizzere influenced by i miznean DAVE: an old version of rose from a liznong time ago

RIZZLE fo all my homies in the pen: yizzay!

DIZZAVE doggystyle: n mah brizzay was tha same wizzle DAVE: or DAVE: yo' nigga i miznean

RIZZLE: dirk!

DAVE: he was a paradox clone of himsizzle DIZNAVE: and he like DAVE: did kind of tha sizzay ho-slappin' DAVE: modeled himsizzle afta...

ROXY: ... Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit.

DAVE so jus' chill: why dizzont we nizzot rap about dirk DAVE: I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon. can we change tha subject

ROXIZZLE: you brought him up!!

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: i kizzy DIZNAVE: i knizzle DAVE: Nigga get shut up or get wet up. look DAVE: i br'n up a lot of th'n DAVE: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. and then have ta back trizzack a lot of those steppin' i br'n up DAVE cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: cauze sometimes tha mackin' i br'n up be ill advizzle to say or mizzy thugz uncomfortable or M-to-tha-izzake me uncomfortable DAVE: its J-to-tha-izzust a th'n 'bout me

ROXY: ooh! ROXY: just had a thought ROXY: do i git ta do a lightn'n round at you next hittin that booty??

DAVE: i gizzay so yizneah DAVE: depends on if you want to kizneep rhymin' 'n dis goddamn pizzle

ROXY: hmm i dunno ROXY fo gettin yo pimp on: M-to-tha-izzaybe our aszes be gettin too hizzle

DAVE: M-to-tha-izzaybe you should spizneak fo` yoself

ROZE and yo momma: D-TO-THA-IZZAVE!

DIZZAVE: SHIZZIT

RIZZLE: lol

DAVE: no mizzy look DAVE: roxy i mizzay DAVE: its lizzy i wizzle just say'n DAVE so jus' chill: i jizzle sizzy steppin' it is jiznust like dis fizzorce of natizzle no one can control or even tizzy ta, lizzeast of all me DAVE: we just hiznave ta cross our fingers n H-to-tha-izzope fo` tha bizzay DAVE: Slap your mutha fuckin self. n that mah one dawg verbal slapstick routine isnt too freudian 'n nature or at least not that often DIZZAVE: anyway lets pretizzle i didnt J-to-tha-izzust insinuate you have a hizzle ass n move on

ROXY:  in tha mutha fuckin club;)

DAVE: i hizzy sum-m sum-m 'bout wizards DAVE with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: you hells into wizards lizzay roze?

ROXY: YIZZLE

DIZNAVE: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. ok well that be a predictable if somewhat bland fizzy D-TO-THA-IZZAVE and yo momma: lizzets see if we can dizzy a shawty deepa DAVE: dont git me wrong wizizzles be ok i guess

ROXY: oh yeah? wiznell miznaybe YOURE ok

DAVE: yizzeah, im alrizzle DIZZAVE: wizards be crazy ass nigga at mizzle than me DIZZAY: but im pusha than wizzles at rizzap DIZZLE: so i guess it brizneaks even DAVE so you betta run and grab yo glock: or it wiznould if i was a pretend jackass 'n silly robes n a dumb bizzy DAVE: so point goes ta dave

ROZE: Chill as I take you on a trip. (Siznigh.)

DAVE: d-ya like rizzay

ROXIZZLE, betta check yo self: kinda! ROXY: D-to-tha-izzirk loves riznap so i cuz Im tha Double O G...

RIZZLE mah nizzle: ummm hiznaha neva mizzay

ROXY in tha mutha fuckin club: forgot we werent talkin 'bout that

DAVE: wizzell W-H-to-tha-izzat do you like ta do

ROXY spittin' that real shit: i like........... ROXY: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. cats!!!

DAVE: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. ok thizzle be a fair opizzle but cats arent actuallizzle an activity or nothin' trippin'

ROXY fo yo bitch ass: theyyizzle kizzle were fo` me though! ROXY: i uh ROXY and yo momma: uze' to cliznone them ROXY: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. i mizzay have um ROXY: gizzle a shawty carry away

DIZNAVE upside yo head: ciznat clon'n huh D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: thizzay sizzle like a pretty dope hobbizzle DAVE: i think were mobbin' somizzle D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: so you had access ta that kind of stuff becauze' you livizzle 'n a sizzy wizzorld

ROXY: Bounce wit me. a scifi wizzay but real niggaz don't give a fuck?

DAVE: yizneah the future DAVE: whizzat was tha futizzle like

ROXY: watery ROXY: fiznulla chess thugz ROXY: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. lots o pumpkins ROXY: u knizzle

RIZZLE: usual dystopian sizzy

DAVE: i see DIZNAVE: n it was just tha chizness gizzle n yizzle DIZZLE: Holla! lizzike alone DAVE: no otha thugz except fo` bro DAVE: who i guess wizzy wizzle off somewhere? Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.

ROXY: yup

DAVE: sounds liznike kind of a bumma

ROXY mah nizzle: yeah ROXY: i tizzle ta mah niggaz a lot though ROXY: via computa n S-H-to-tha-izzit

DAVE: thizzats coo' DAVE with the S-N-double-O-P: me tizzay DAVE: maybe whiznen it comes D-to-tha-izzown ta it our lizzles werent thiznat differizzle DAVE if you gots a paper stack: except fo` tha extinction of humanity pizzart DAVE: mah humans were jiznust DAVE: imminently extinct be all DIZZY: i didnt have chess guys around though DAVE: thizzle actually good company

ROXY: yeah!!

DAVE to increase tha peace: my best bizzy biznest bizzle biznest nigga be a C-H-to-tha-izzess homey DAVE: hizzay tha mayor DAVE: ill hiznave ta introduce yizzy ta him soon DAVE: youll love tha mayor everybody lovizzles tha mayor

ROXY: wanna meet tha mayor in tha mutha fuckin club!

DAVE fo' sho': dont W-O-Double-Rizzy ill pizzy 'n a good wiznord fo` you pretty sure we cizzy find an open'n 'n hizzle schedule DIZZAY in tha dogg pound: tizzy me more

RIZZLE: miznore?

DAVE: about you

RIZZLE: damn dude RIZZLE now pass the glock: dis fry'n pan...

ROXIZZLE: sizzy be SIZZLIN

DAVE: fuck yeah DAVE with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back aside from cat breed'n how elze dizzy you pass tha tizzime

ROXY: ummmmmmmm ROXY: writin ROXY: um ROXY: a FAIR amount of uh ROXY: Its just anotha homocide. lets say recreational liquid intake ROXY: Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit. n uhh ROXY: oh um hack'n

DIZZAY: haha seriouslizzle DIZZAY: lizzle actual hack'n

ROXY: yeah! ROXY: well computa blingin' rly ROXIZZLE in all flavas: hack'n be jizzle W-H-to-tha-izzat u call it ta sizzound cizzy ROXY: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. thizzere wasnt evizzle much shit arizzle to "hack"

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: so kizninda L-to-tha-izzike john DIZNAVE: except DAVE: i thizzay he pretty mizzy sucked at hizzy codes

ROXY: hahahizzle reallizzle

DAVE dogg: yeah DIZZAVE puttin tha smack down: he seemed ta find it frustrat'n mizzle DIZZAVE: his bitch'n 'bout it is literallizzle mah only point of reference fo` his degree of proficiency DAVE droppin hits: youre gizzle though right DIZNAVE: i bizzy youre good

ROXY: thizza BEST 8)

DIZZLE: knew it

ROXIZZLE: maybe i cizzy gizzay him siznome pimp on the leet hizzy

DAVE: fuck yes DIZZAVE: hizzle be all about thizzay DAVE: or i think he should be which be all that matta DIZNAVE: do T-H-to-tha-izzat n insist on it if he gizzy weirdly obstinate or like tries ta pretend he D-to-tha-izzoesnt like programming anymore

ROXIZZLE: ok

DIZZY: You gotta check dis shit out yo. what elze

ROXY spittin' that real shit: oh umm ROXY: idk dave i mizzy be runnin outta shizzit ta sizzay! One, two three and to tha four.

DIZNAVE: yizzle siznure

ROXY: iiizzle ROXY: liked to plizzay games?

DIZZLE to increase tha peace: what games

ROXY to increase tha peace: uh mostly... ROXY: tha nintizzles

DAVE: i see DIZNAVE: which nintendos

ROXY: a wizzy bunch of nintendos!! ROXY dogg: liznike lotsa diff systems n titles ROXY: i dunno if tha ones i associate strongly wit wizzay have tha sizname mean'n lizzay culturally speaking fo` yizzou ROXY: coz ta me they were all lizzy coo' ancient rizzles that kept me somewhat 'n touch witta world thizzay wizzas lizzy gone

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: thizzay makes S-to-tha-izzense DAVE: thizzle mostly tha relationshizzle i hizzay now wit garbage romcoms DAVE: Freak y'all, into the beat y'all. largelizzle coz karkat likes watchin em DIZZAVE: so theze godforsakizzle F-L-to-tha-izzicks hiznave hizzle keep me grounded 'n our dead civilization 'n a weird wiznay DIZZLE: but re: games... DIZNAVE: i didnt have nintendos DAVE: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. mah brizzay had xbizzox so i played thizzat sometimes DAVE: but he mostlizzle had all theze S-H-I-Double-Tizzy chillin' gamizzles DIZZAVE: n lizzay 20 different tony hawk titles DIZZLE: i would mainly just pliznay T-H-to-tha-izzem ta fuck around DAVE: like find spectacular wizzy to crizzay n flop arizzle lizzay a douchey ragdoll DAVE: or figizzle out ways to git halfway stuck inside concrizzle fixtures n obstacles DAVE: n wizzatch all theze coo' fratty bros T-W-to-tha-izzitch n flop ad infinizzle DAVE: L-to-tha-izzike struggl'n valiantly n earnestly brotha against tha shitty n dizzle flawed physics of they confin'n virtizzle prison DAVE: i saw tizzy as tragic figures

ROXY: that sounds incredizzle tbh

DAVE: prizzle much

ROXY: do u think we can pliznay games hustla sizzay tizzy? ROXY: Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. wanna sizzee ur majizzle skatebros 'n they elemizzle

DIZZLE: oh mah dick yes

ROZE: Dave.

DAVE: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. what

ROXY: ok ok ! ROXIZZLE: i think its ROXY: mah turn cuz Im tha Double O G??

RIZZLE: kizzy yo' ass 'n the pizzay buddy u gona git GRILLED

DAVE: thiznats fizzy

ROXY: oh um ROXY: roze pleaze dont think im doggy stylin' you! ROXY: jump 'n tha cizzle any tizzle k?

DIZZAY: mizzle shizzes fizzy

ROXIZZLE: :p

ROZE yeah yeah baby: I'm perfizzle happizzle hatin' as a spectator n occasional officiator of thizzay conversation bitch ass nigga. ROZE: It quite entertaining ta behold, really. I lizzle watch'n how different personalities collide with each otha upon spendin'. ROZE: Neitha of yizzy be hatin' ta disizzle.

ROXY: lizzy

RIZZLE: god is EVIZZLE 'n dis family trizzle a psychoanalyst cuz its a G thang???

DIZZLE: yo tizzy B-to-tha-izzeen lizzay D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: ha EXACT top preoccizzle siznince shizzle wizzay a fuckin baby DAVE: dizzy she tell you

ROXY keep'n it real yo: haha no ROXY: but yeah makes senze ROXY: bizzle like, youre all mr funny interrogation R-to-tha-izzight now, roze be qiznuite possibly a litizzle therapist in trainizzle i guess?? and uh dizzay is dizzy ROXIZZLE: jizzy makes ya T-H-to-tha-izzink be all

DAVE: W-to-tha-izzere all fizzle up, tha end DAVE: so what you wanna know mom DAVE: ..rox

> [A6A6I5] ====>

[alenahorowitz]

“New Family”

I awoke to my cousins and their neighbor coming into the dining room for breakfast. They gave me a silky blue pin-striped robe to wear around the house while drinking coffee and sharing a traditional Dutch breakfast of toast, ham, sunny-side up eggs and cheese. In my blue robe, I tasted the strong coffee and felt the cool black-matte tiles and Turkish carpets beneath my bare feet. Their central-canal houseboat was absolutely adorable with light minty-green walls decorated with multiple sizes of Dutch ceramic-blue plates and mirrors of many shapes and intricacies; and the shelves were lined with healthy cookbooks and abstract lino-cut paintings of naked men.

The real boss of the house is a giant yellow cat with the cutest smushed face, a crooked smile and big pumpkin eyes. My cousins are both part of a men’s choir, so they’re always singing little choruses to the cat and it actually sounds pretty nice! Whenever he enters the room, you hear, “You are so beautiful to me, Frankieeee,” or another famous song replacing the lyrics with the cat’s name. They meow at him, talk to him and brush his hair 3x a day they said. Beautiful swans swim up to the open doorway on the boat and peer into the house. Frank doesn’t like the swans invading his territory, so he hisses at them from under the couch. Swans are actually really mean vicious creatures and they like their necks into the house and terrorize Frank, hissing back at him in his own house. My cousins scramble to grab Frankie and shut the door so he doesn’t get dragged into the canal by the big evil birds.

The canal they live on is super cute with little brick buildings and painted white window frames. They live a few blocks from the central “Niewmarkt” which is a revolving market changing from an organic market, to a flea market, to a souvenir market from one day to the next. I noticed that the houses all were leaning in toward the street, which I thought reminded me of Venice so I asked whether they were sinking. Actually, they were purposely built bending out toward the street, with a hook protruding from the peak of each roof in order to hoist furniture to the upper levels without breaking the windows on the bottom floors–interesting architectural fact!

One cousin, that was born in Amsterdam, took me exploring to the Albert Cuyp Market while the other practiced his weekend pieces with the choir. They both speak fluent Dutch and have been living here on their houseboat for the last 15-years. Markets are honestly my favorite parts about visiting different places as you really get to see how people work, play and eat. He pointed out vendors grilling mini puff-pancakes (poffertjes) and browning honey-filled Stroopwaffel (two flattened waffle cones surrounding a sticky layer of syrup). Sweet smells from these traditional delicacies filled the market air and attracted customers. We sat eating fried Lekkerbek fish with their type of tartar sauce as young neighborhood boys twizzled raw Harring covered in mayonnaise into their open mouths. Trying local cuisine is also one of my favorite parts about traveling.

The market stalls had their street-facing tables set up, but if you wanted to see more, they were connected to an actual store at the back. We poked in and out of flower stalls, looking for bouquets to bring for his friend’s birthday that evening. There were many unique flowers and combinations I’d never even seen before, which really surprised me after living in Hawaii. We decided on a really unique “Fall” bouquets with pine cones, crimson leaves, and a tall dried corncob as the focal piece. He bought flowers for his friend, and some more flowers to add to the collection that’s currently occupying their living room (they now have sunflowers, purple mums, bright pink roses, and light pink roses).

We caught the train out of the city to the sweet suburban house of the birthday girl. Their modern white house was decorated with huge colorful paintings and heaping glass bowls filled with real red apples, orange mangoes, purple onions, and ripened bananas added to the decor. She had three giant bouquets of roses about 3’ tall, standing in late cylindrical glass vases on the floor. They welcomed me warmly with three kisses on the cheek per guest (once you get through greeting an entire group of people, that’s a LOT of kisses!). Everywhere I’ve been has a different greeting culture and seems to add one kiss to the cheek every time! The Croatians kissed once, the French kissed twice (besi besi), and the Dutch do three (and if they’re really close with someone they do a forth one on the lips!).

The partygoers started pulling out their food contributions and I swear by the end, I’ve never felt so full in my life. Upon arrival they had nuts, berries, cheese and crackers. There was zucchini (courgette) soup with a dollop of crème fraîche and loads of cilantro to start. They brought out fresh crusty baguettes with French butter and crystallized salt, then they baked a huge bread-flower that was sliced in opposite directions and stuffed with Brie cheese in every crack, creating a pull-apart-flower of cheesy goodness. Beef skewers with tzetiki sauce and grilled wings chicken with peanut sauce were pulled off the barbecue and lastly we were presented with three desserts–homemade blueberry cheesecake, a nut pie and tart de tartar (my absolute favorite, a thinly-sliced Apple pie baked upside down without a top crust). We corked wine bottle after wine bottle and after a few too many glasses, everyone was hugging me saying, “New family! New family!” I really felt like family! :)

Always,

Alena Horowitz | Miss Potato