#pseudonyms was the first book that i really really cared about

[futzfuck]

HEAVY SPOILERS FOR MONKEY MAN!!!! GO WATCH THE MOVIE IF YOU HAVENT ITS REALLY GOOD DAMMIT!!!!!!!

Anyway

I think an overlooked bit in Monkey Man is how bleach is used as imagery and association. Bleach is often use is to remove stains from clothes/surfaces, disinfect things, and just generally clean stuff. I think this plays a lot into the revenge narrative central to the film, as well as offering a comparison/contrast to the villians’ methods of “removing India’s scars”

When the Kid first shows his hands he says they look that way from bleach and chemicals and calls them his CV. Now, without the mention of bleach this scene is still impactful within context, bc the Kid is indirectly saying that his life is defined by his trauma and the death of his mother (and maybe even his inability to save her). Hands are also a reoccurring symbol throughout the film in an of themselves. But back to bleach. I think mentioning bleach is important bc it depicts bleach as corrosive and something higher ups don’t want to engage in. “Give me the job no one wants to do, and ill do it.” No one at Kings wants what the Kid wants, and no one there is willing to cleanse the city and the establishment of its own corruption.

There’s also the fact that Kid’s pseudonym comes from the brand of bleach he uses at his job. By naming himself after the bleach he uses, Kid associates himself with an aggressive way of cleansing, which is kinda the whole message of Monkey Man as a narrative. It’s telling that the closest thing to a conventional name we have for the Kid just reinforces his purpose within the story.

Finally, the Kid bleaches his monkey mask before he goes to Kings for the final act. I think this is symbolic of him stripping away his persona of “Kong” that he used as a fighter from the mask, replacing it with the identity of Hanuman he has come to inhabit. The lighter fur looks more like the fur Hanuman is shown to have throughout the movie, both in the children’s book and the puppet in the stage play. It could also symbolize the Kid “cleansing his mind” of what remains from before he was saved by the hijras, and fully embracing his purpose.

Am i thinking about this way to much? Obviously but i don’t care bc its fun lol. Love this movie.

[frodothefair]

I recently came upon a post on Reddit about why people do not comment on fanfiction as much as they used to, and here are two interesting observations that jumped out at me:

And ok, my thought on this are:

Regarding what's outlined in the second post... *facepalm* Do people really not have anything better to do? Like, really? Really-really? Harassing people for the fics they comment on? But I suppose, it's not entirely surprising. One of my friends is of the opinion that on the internet these days, anyone can be a minor celebrity, and what do ill-meaning fans and papparazzi do to celebrities? They stalk them and try to make a scandal out of everything they do. We've seen it with Britney Spears, and I've seen it with youtube creators, and I've seen it with roleplayers. Different scale of fame, similar behavior, and in the age of social media, anyone can be a self-styled paparazzo.

Regarding the first post, I admit I've been guilty of ranting about a comment once, but it was a peculiar case where a person said that I had a pro-Lothíriel and anti-Éomer bias in my responses to other readers (not even in the actual fic). And ultimately I feel that I blew it out of proportion, and quickly deleted the post. All this is to say, I do not care what kind of comments you post - I welcome them all: short comments, long comments, even comments that don't make sense. Hate or harassment will not be tolerated, but kind concrit is welcome, because how else am I going to get better? Thankfully, I often do get comments: from my mutuals, but also from other consistent and drive-by readers (more for Eothiriel than for Frodogold, understandably). Interestingly, I've found that people have been increasingly commenting under guest pseudonyms - which helps separate your reader-self from other parts of your online presence. There are pros and cons to allowing and using guest comments, but that is one way around the problems described above. Another thing you can do is have a reading account that is separate from your writing account, again to avoid being judged for your tastes and opinions as a reader.

Image transcripts under the cut:

[Jade-Dragon927]

I think its a combination of things. Some that have been recent, and others that have been slowly making change.

Most of our social media pages display engagement from likes, follows, and shares while providing very little response and satisfaction for commenting. This has slowly been changing how other media sites show engagement with their audiences over the past half decade.

Recently however, I've noticed that the opinion of those that write fanfiction have shifted, and I completely disagree with it. A lot of people kn the fanfiction sphere complain about short comments, too long of comments, comments that don't make sense, just about anyone commenting anything. ESPECIALLY constructive criticism or criticism comments. I cannot agree with people who think commenting criticism and "con-crit" shouldn't be allowed or done.

A lot of people are complaining about how people comment now-a-days and it makes others wary of commenting now. It's pretty sad to see.

[Guoba-Gaming]

This isn't a catch-all explanation, but based on my experience (as part of a few video game and book fandoms) and the experience of my friend (who is part of a few danmei fandoms), there have been cases where people will go to the comments section of controversial fics and harrass the people who commented using their public AO3 account. They'll either check if the AO3 account is linked to any social media accounts (like Twitter) where they can bully the commenter, or they'll go on the AO3 profile of the commenter and leave bad comments on their fics. We've also seen this happen with more innocuous stuff like Kudos.

Again, this is only what my friend and I have personally observed, and this isn't applicable to all fics, only those with dark or controversial content.

[laxmiree]

[CN] MLQC Lucien’s Poison Date translation (Part 1/2)

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a date that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

⚠️ Content Warning: Suicide. Please proceed cautiously and prioritize your mental and emotional well-being when engaging with this material

I’ve committed unforgivable sins, drunk the incurable poison.

Your sweet voice has set my reason ablaze, beckoning me to follow you to the depths of hell.

So kiss me, my love, with those poisoned lips of yours.

[T/N: In the original CN date, XM has two ‘identities’ because of the plot. ‘Xu Mo’, the future king and MC’s late husband; and ‘Lucien’, the actor (Yes, PG used his official English name as a pseudonym). But in my translation, I will switch the use of ‘Xu Mo’ and ‘Lucien’ considering how the EN server is more familiar with the name ‘Lucien’, and the context of the date where it sets on the medieval era and the actor is said to be from the east. So, for my translation:

The late husband-> Lucien

The actor-> Xu Mo]

[T/N: another thing, Lucien often addresses MC with 夫人 (fūrén) here, and basically, it’s a rather polite address for a married woman. When the husband says it, it can be translated as ‘my wife’. However, if it’s not the husband that says it, it’s more of a polite title to another person’s wife, similar to ‘Madam’.]

-

[Subbed Video - Turn on CC!]

VERY recommended to watch the video for the complete experience. Hearing the name ‘Lucien’ being said in CN is a novel experience, and the different tone between the proud (late husband) Lucien and flattering (actor) Xu Mo is interesting lol.

[Part 1]

Can't be found in ten thousand books,

Nor has it been passed down in ten thousand poems,

The secret elixir is as sweet as honey at times, and as bitter as chicory at others;

Once you taste a drop, your soul will perish.

Kiss me, with those poisoned lips of yours.

The scattered sound of horseshoes lightly tapping on cobblestones, along with people's cheers and whispered conversations, pierced through the carriage curtains and drifted into my ears.

Passerby A: I can't believe that aloof Cardinal is willing to leave the monastic order for the sake of love!

Passerby B: Tsk, what love? I heard this is all arranged by the Pope and the King; the bishop hasn't even met the princess.

Passerby A: Huh? You can get married without ever having met?

Passerby B: Aren't most of these political marriages like that? By marrying the princess, the bishop will become the king in the future!

MC: ….

I quietly clenched the hem of my skirt and closed my eyes tightly.

Of course, I know that my marriage to Lucien is simply a collaborative arrangement between my father and the Pope.

Both sides needed to gain more power and more significant influence, so they decided to merge their 'treasures' into one.

No one really cares about the thoughts of the two protagonists in this marriage- except me.

??: Princess, you seem a bit nervous?

The warm voice coming from the opposite seat seemed to be imbued with magic as if it could capture my breath the moment they spoke.

I was startled and immediately opened my eyes, just in time to meet his gaze.

The cardinal in front of me still sat upright like a priest, but he was no longer dressed in the solemn cassock and looked more like a prince from a fairy tale.

A flush of heat surged up my cheeks, and I stammered as I shook my head.

MC: N-No, I'm not nervous…

My marriage partner sitting in front of me suddenly smiled.

Lucien: The princess need not fret. Just know that God blesses our union.

MC: Um, I know. But what I care about isn't the blessing of the gods, but… it's…

Lucien: What is it then?

His gaze was deep and focused, and I felt defenseless after just a second of eye contact. When I spoke again, my voice was as faint as a whisper.

MC: Lucien, actually, the first time I saw you in the cathedral, I…

Lucien: Shh, we're at the cathedral now.

Lucien extended his index finger, silently halting the words I was about to say next.

At this moment, the carriage had stopped in front of a long staircase covered in flower petals, and welcoming drums filled the air.

Lucien: Let's save the rest for after the ceremony. Step out of the carriage now, Princess.

Lucien was about to open the carriage door when I suddenly grabbed his sleeve, causing him to turn back with a hint of surprise.

Lucien: Princess?

MC: (blushing) I….

I knew I shouldn't have dwelled on the confession I couldn't finish earlier. The fleeting thought was insignificant compared to the upcoming ceremony.

MC: I…

My face turned red. But Lucien smiled as he gently turned his wrist and pinched my fingers.

Lucien: MC, don't worry, my heart is the same as yours.

He unexpectedly understood all my anxieties and expectations. He placed my fingertips gently against his lips, treasuring and tender.

Lucien: From the moment I first laid eyes on you, Princess, I…

MC: ——Liar!!

I sit up in bed abruptly, cold sweat soaking through the dress on my back.

I've lost count of how many times I've had this nightmare.

Flowers, kisses, blessings... It was such a happy scene, but every time it replayed in my mind, it only made my heart tighten.

I'm still in shock when suddenly the door is knocked twice, then pushed open, and the flickering light of a candlestick enters the room.

??: Madam, are you…?

MC: Who is it?!

The sudden voice of a man startles me, and I quickly turn towards the source of the light.

But the moment I see the face bathed in the warm yellow light, my pupils widen in shock.

Narrow eyes, soft lips, a high-bridged nose... a nearly perfect combination of features that form the face I least wanted to encounter.

MC: Lucien?

The other person noticeably freezes upon hearing my murmur. Then, he breaks into a smile.

??:[chuckles] Madam, have you mistaken me for someone else?

MC: I was mistaken…

The light flickers and I finally snap out of it.

MC: ...Right, you can't be Lucien.

The person in front of me is just a man who looks much like Lucien.

—Because my husband was secretly executed by the Pope a long time ago.

MC: Then who are you, and why are you here?

The young man who resembles Lucien smiles again at my words.

??: My name is Xu Mo.

??: I was brought back to the palace by you tonight. Have you forgotten?

MC: Tonight?

I pause for a moment. Today is the anniversary of my father's death, and I drank heavily. The Pope took pity on me and arranged for me to relax at the theater.

I've already forgotten the content of the play in my drunkenness, and the man before me, named Xu Mo... seems to be the male actor from that play.

— Could it be that I brought him back while I was drunk?

I feel a bit absurd and incredulous, so I can only let out an embarrassed cough.

MC: Even if... even if you were brought back by me, you shouldn't be here.

Xu Mo: It seems that Madam is indeed drunk. It was your request for me to guard your door tonight.

MC: ….

As he speaks, he raises the candlestick with a sincere and innocent expression, casting light on the costume he's still wearing. I become even more bewildered.

Xu Mo notices my distraction and tilts his head with concern.

Xu Mo: Madam, did you sleep poorly?

MC: What?

Xu Mo: Your appearance is worn, and you seem in constant worry, with a disordered mind. I have some knowledge of calming methods that might help you sleep.

MC: I don't need-

I forcibly suppressed the words that slipped out of my mouth.

I should refuse.

After all, I don't even know this Xu Mo; he's just a stranger actor I brought back with me.

But his face and the way he speaks are so much like Lucien…

Almost as if by some strange force, I nod.

MC: Alright, let's give it a try.

Xu Mo respectfully bows to me and retrieves a small, delicate incense burner from his pouch, placing it on the table.

Xu Mo: This is a spice from the East that can help sweep away all your worries.

Xu Mo: Close your eyes, madam. I will continue to stand guard outside the door.

The gentle voice lingers in the mist, and I sink into the feathered warmth.

Xu Mo: (whisper softly)…Fool.

In a daze, I seem to hear a sigh, and then the door closes.

[Part 2]

=Flashback start=

Lucien: The main component of this poison comes from aconitine, a plant originating from the East.

Lucien: Its flowers are quite beautiful. Would you like to see them?

Lucien carefully took out a specimen of aconite flowers. The eerie and vibrant shade of purple solidified into a thin sheet, making it impossible to look away.

MC: Such a beautiful flower unexpectedly hides such a deadly poison…

Lucien: Even though it's poison, it's also medicine. Eastern people use its roots for pain relief and treating illnesses, whereas we only use it to kill people.

As Lucien spoke these extremely dangerous words, I didn't feel a hint of fear. Instead, I found a more comfortable position in his arm.

MC: Are you trying to say whether it's poison or medicine depends entirely on the person?

Lucien:[chuckles] Yes, my wife is very clever.

The rewarding kiss landed on my forehead, and Lucien set aside the aconite specimen, picking up another piece of artwork.

Lucien: This is called "Strychnine". The poison extracted from it…

Lucien wasn't only a perfect husband but also an excellent teacher.

He taught me many knowledge areas I shouldn't have had access to, which made me feel a sense of freshness as someone who had previously only been exposed to the arts.

I flipped through the pages of previous records. I felt deeply moved and asked Lucien.

MC: With so many types of poison, what do you think is the most terrifying kind of poison?

Lucien pondered, his fingertips unconsciously leaving faint traces on the parchment.

Lucien: Me? I believe the most terrifying poison is one that is unknowable and incurable.

Lucien: Not knowing when it was administered, not knowing how to antidote it, not knowing when one might die…

Lucien: Being afflicted with such a poison is the most despairing thing.

I listen but only half-understanding it. Lucien looks at my confused expression, smiles, and gently squeezes my palm.

Lucien: Don't worry, Madam, all my poisons have their rightful place.

At that moment, the voice of a servant from outside the door reminded Lucien that it was time for him to attend to matters.

Lucien put down his book with a bit of regret, his breath lingering in my hair as if reluctant to part.

Lucien: (whispers coquettishly)Hmm, I really don't want to go…

MC: Pfft, how can the future king not attend to state affairs?

Lucien: [chuckles] Because state affairs are dull, and being with my wife is fun.

His frank love words always easily stirred my heartbeat.

The waiter outside urged again, so I had to restrain myself and push away his clasping fingers.

MC: Hurry, Father and the Pope are impatient.

Lucien cast a somewhat helpless glance at me before slowly getting up and wearing his outer robe.

He casually tidied up the messy strands of hair he had caused and gestured with his eyes toward the nearby harp.

Lucien: When I return, we won't have the pharmacology class, you will teach me to play the harp, okay?

MC: Sure, I'll prepare some sheet music. If you don't learn well, I might have to give you a "tough lesson" with a pointer stick!

Lucien: I will study hard, teacher.

=Flashback ends=

Xu Mo: You seemed to have slept well yesterday.

Xu Mo's voice brings back my thoughts, and I withdraw my gaze to look at him.

He's still wearing that costume, and there's a layer of weary darkness under his eyes - the one who didn't sleep last night is him.

I caress the silver cup he brought, and the warmth of milk inside soothes my fingertips.

MC: Why are you so eagerly attentive?

My words are so straightforward that they make Xu Mo get momentarily taken aback, but then he bends down to please me.

Xu Mo: If I can serve by Madam's side, I won't have to travel with the theater troupe anymore.

Xu Mo: Since Madam has given me an opportunity, I want to seize it.

Xu Mo's words are even more greedy and obsequious than mine, and I can't help but sneer.

MC: You should know that I am a widow.

Xu Mo: Of course, I know. Once your health is restored, His Holiness will return power to you, and you will be the most noble woman in this kingdom.

MC: Since you know that, and yet you dared to say what you just did, it seems you're not a good person after all.

Xu Mo: I never claimed to be a good person. Moreover, in this world, good people don't live long.

Xu Mo: So Madam, are you satisfied with the soothing incense from yesterday?

In just a moment, the ambition that flickered in Xu Mo's eyes overlapped with the one Lucien had once shown.

But in the blink of an eye, what remains before me is still a compliant and humble male actor.

I fall silent for a moment, then set down the slightly cooled milk and reach my hand toward him.

MC: Help me up. I want to take a walk in the garden.

Xu Mo bows deeply to me, a satisfied smile on his face.

Xu Mo: As you command, Madam.

These past few years, my body has become frail due to excessive grief.

Apart from going to the cathedral for weekly prayers, I spend my time alone in the study, reading books. It's been a long time since I set foot in the garden.

I sigh as I look at the withered foliage before me.

MC: The flowers have all withered…

Xu Mo: Does Madam like flowers?

MC: It's him who likes them.

The "him" in my words is obvious, and Xu Mo simply nods faintly without further inquiry.

— As a commoner aspiring to climb the social ladder, he is pretty pragmatic.

Xu Mo: Would Madam be willing to introduce these flowers to me?

MC: Why should I introduce them to you?

Xu Mo: Hmm... I suppose there's no harm since we have nothing better to do, right?

Xu Mo: I will study hard, teacher.

He unintentionally spoke the exact same words as Lucien but in a completely different tone. My fingers involuntarily tighten as I slowly respond.

MC: These are oleanders. They have a long blooming season and are quite beautiful when in full bloom. However, they are toxic if ingested, so one must be careful not to consume them…

MC: These few plants are the black datura he collected back then, very rare but equally poisonous…

I'm not a competent teacher, and my vocabulary for the introduction is dry, far less vivid, and interesting than when Lucien used to explain things.

However, Xu Mo listens with great interest. It might be my imagination, but his gaze doesn't seem to be focused on the flowers; instead, it feels like he's looking at me.

Xu Mo: ...Madam's extensive knowledge of flowers and poisons is quite impressive, a bit beyond my expectations.

MC: It's all things he told me about.

Xu Mo: I guess he must be very happy. After all, someone is willing to remember this knowledge so well.

MC: He's gone, what's the point of talking about whether he's happy or not?

The atmosphere suddenly grew colder.

Xu Mo falls silent momentarily, takes a short breath, and no longer discusses plants with me. Instead, he starts talking about peculiar stories from the streets.

He travels with the theater troupe from the East, witnessing countless fascinating customs and traditions along the way.

In terms of eloquence, he is also quite similar to Lucien.

I listen attentively without giving away my thoughts, occasionally posing a few tricky questions in an attempt to learn more about his background.

Xu Mo's answers remain seamless, without any hint of a flaw.

It's only when our walk comes to an end, and he assists me back to my seat wrapped in furs, that he suddenly smiles.

Xu Mo: Is Madam trying to see someone through me?

MC: I'm not.

As soon as the words leave my mouth, I regret them. I answered too quickly, making it seem like I was trying to conceal something.

And so, Xu Mo's smile deepens.

Xu Mo: [chuckles] It doesn't matter, as long as Madam is willing to have me serve her, I will ensure her satisfaction.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's always Lucien that I love.

But precisely because of that, I find myself uncontrollably searching for traces of Lucien in Xu Mo. And with each of his gestures, he becomes more and more like my late husband.

He's like a certain kind of poison that numbs my senses, making me unable to resist peering and sniffing, deliberately getting me addicted.

Very quickly, filthy rumors began to target my empty palace.

But I don't care. After my father and Lucien both died one after another, and with illness plaguing me, everyone regarded me as ominous.

So what does it matter to the world what the ominous person wants to do?

Moreover, now that Xu Mo takes care of me, my health seems to have improved a little. Even the Pope was a bit surprised when I went to the cathedral to pray this time.

The Pope: MC, may God bless you; your complexion has finally improved.

MC: Thank you for your compassion, Your Holiness.

The Pope helps me to my feet and hands me holy water.

The Pope: Once you feel better, our young queen can be crowned, and I can confidently return the kingdom to you.

I smile and don't respond to his words, simply sipping the holy water slowly.

There is still a familiar sweetness in the water, and the seal wax around the rim of the chalice can easily be accidentally ingested.

I furrow my brow tightly, and the Pope's voice continues to come from beside my ear.

The Pope: However, once you become queen, you can't be as willful as you are now.

The Pope: I heard you have taken a male companion, this could damage your reputation.

It turns out there's not much difference between the most powerful Pope and common beggars. I sneered inwardly while maintaining a respectful demeanor on my face.

MC: How could I dare to do anything immoral under the watchful gaze of God? Xu Mo is merely my servant, taking care of my daily life.

I don't want to continue discussing Xu Mo with the Pope and change the topic.

MC: By the way, my birthday is in a couple of days, and since I've been feeling better lately, I'd like to organize a celebration.

MC: Will you come?

The Pope places the silver cup containing holy water back in its place and smiles benevolently.

The Pope: I'm your second father. So of course, I will come.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Although I said I wanted to have a good celebration, in reality, there are not many people willing to come on my birthday.

After all, in the eyes of the world, I'm just a widow without support who could die of depression at any moment, so there is naturally no need for flattery or fawning.

The simple banquet is coming to an end when Xu Mo, who has been absent for half a day, suddenly appears before me.

MC: Where have you been?

Xu Mo: Nobles' party is no place for a commoner like me.

MC: I thought you might take this opportunity to find more opportunities for yourself.

Xu Mo: Madam, your saying hurts my heart greatly and underestimates my loyalty.

He takes my wine glass with a smile, places it under his nose, and gives it a light sniff, furrowing his brow slightly.

Xu Mo: The aroma of this wine is too coarse. Please, have my glass, Madam.

Our act of exchanging glasses is too ambiguous, and at this moment, there are already malicious whispers coming from the corners of the banquet hall.

Neither Xu Mo nor I pay any attention to these voices. He hands me his cup, and amidst the fruity aroma filling the silver cup, there's a hint of bitterness. My eyelashes tremble slightly.

MC: Alright.

Xu Mo watches me finish the drink, and only then does he breathe a sigh of relief.

His gaze briefly passes over the Pope, who is surrounded by the crowd not far away, before returning to my face.

Xu Mo: I've just prepared a birthday gift for you, Madam.

MC: What is it?

Xu Mo: It's a play.

Xu Mo: I have already set up the stage, arranged the actors, and after the banquet, I will present it to…

The Pope: I presume you are the servant named Xu Mo?

The Pope's voice interrupted our conversation. The old man walks over, and his gaze sweeps over Xu Mo’s face like a knife, raising an eyebrow.

The Pope: Oh, Xu Mo, you have a face that is both... dangerous and nostalgic.

The Pope: I hope you are a loyal servant to your master so that I can rest assured.

Xu Mo respectfully bows to the Pope and speaks in a gentle tone.

Xu Mo: I am forever loyal.

The Pope: That's best. So, what were the two of you talking about?

Xu Mo: I want to perform a scene from a play for Madam, as a birthday gift for her.

The Pope: A play?

The Pope smiles at the corner of his mouth, his interest piqued.

The Pope: I wonder if I have the honor to come and enjoy your splendid performance as well?

Xu Mo looks up at me, and a hint of darkness passes through his deep, dark eyes. Then, he takes half a step forward, stops in front of me, and bows to the Pope.

Xu Mo: It'd be my honor.

Part 3 & 4-> [Here]

[tea-and-secrets]

Really wish I could be successful at the things I'm passionate about (VTubing, Pokémon Competitive, Fencing, Voice Acting, and Writing mainly) but also not have anyone know me at all. Like, my Fencing Coach thinks that I might actually be able to make it into the paraolympics one day, but I am also terrified of being on a global stage like that. I've always loved acting and even got my first professional gig at 13 years old, but I do NOT want to be a celebrity. I love VTubing and do it for fun as a hobby and I would love to have a big enough platform where I could do things like charity streams, but dear good all the swatters and doxxers scare the fuck out of me. I am working on getting my first book published, but I am writing under a pseudonym. It's such an agonizing experience and it makes it hard to actually enjoy my passions and it sucks. I Just want me and my loved ones to be left alone y'know? And it sucks that these days success almost always equates to internet fame and having everything about you and the people you care about as public knowledge and being put under a microscope non-stop. Like, the thought of blowing up online genuinely terrifies me.

.

[ridiasfangirlings]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMMoqBGT3/ this with sarumi except the twist is Saruhiko is the writer and Yata the serial killer (I just don't think Yata would prefer writing over killing for some reason .. and comedic purposes)

Imagine Yata as a vaguely incompetent serial killer who’s only gotten away with it so far out of dumb luck, until he meets crime writer Fushimi who starts inadvertently telling him how to do it properly. I have trouble seeing Yata as someone who would be killing for the fun of it though so maybe he’s more like a ‘vigilante’ style serial killer, he kills people who think they’re above the law or who get light sentences for horrible crimes. When he was a kid his mom and stepdad were murdered by his bio-dad who managed to get off scott free on a technicality and it soured Yata on the whole justice system. Years later he managed to kill his dad himself, the body wasn’t found for years and Yata wasn’t a suspect because they’d had no contact since he was a kid. This makes Yata feel like maybe he can make a difference by getting rid of anyone he thinks the world would he better off without (oh and maybe he even kills Niki and Kisa, and the cops don’t catch him because Fushimi gets to the crime scene first and hides some crucial evidence since the killer did him such a favor after all). 

Yata works day jobs as a butcher in grocery store Homra run by Kusanagi and imagine he’s been feeling a little nervous lately because he almost got caught on his last kill. The Homra guys don’t know Yata’s a serial killer and just assume he’s feeling down because Kamamoto just got engaged and here Yata’s never been on a date with anyone. They decide to set Yata up with this dating app, Yata isn’t aware until it’s already installed that it matches you with others based on your search history and now he’s on high alert because his search history is…bad. He ends up matching with this guy Fushimi Saruhiko though and Yata decides why not, he may as well go on a date so he can get the guys off his back. 

When he first meets Fushimi they don’t seem to get along well at all, Yata can’t believe he matched with this gloomy nerd guy who looks like he never leaves the house. Fushimi grumbles that his annoying publisher made him a profile on the app without his consent and Yata’s like wait a publisher do you write. It turns out Fushimi is a really popular crime fiction/mystery author who writes under a pseudonym, Yata’s like oh I think I read some of one of your books before. Without thinking he adds that he thought the way the killer cleaned up the crime scene was unrealistic. Yata realizes what he just said and has an ‘oh shit’ moment, thinking he gave himself away, but Fushimi just clicks his tongue and adjusts his glasses as he says it wasn’t unrealistic at all, explaining the best way to clean up a crime scene without getting caught. Yata’s never really been good at the cleanup and starts taking mental notes. Eventually imagine Fushimi mentions he’s working on a short story right now but he’s stuck on the best way to stab someone so they’ll bleed out in just the right time frame, Yata’s like oh hey I know that one. Soon they’re just back and forth chatting about murder without a care in the world.

Thanks to Fushimi Yata is now an even better killer, he starts following Fushimi’s advice and suddenly his kills are much harder for the police detectives to deal with, imagine the detectives assigned to his cases had thought they were close to a breakthrough but now they aren’t even sure if this killer is the same guy. At the same time Yata likes to hang out with Fushimi while he’s writing, answering questions about how much blood is in the human body and could you really get blood out of bed sheets with this specific cleaner. Whenever Fushimi asks how Yata knows this kind of thing Yata laughs nervously and says he’s a butcher. Fushimi accepts that with a click of his tongue and doesn’t ask again, though imagine Yata is feeling a bit guilty because isn’t this like him using Fushimi and what if he gets Fushimi in trouble because Yata’s crimes are too similar to ones in Fushimi’s books. Eventually he comes to visit Fushimi one day as a police detective is leaving, Yata worriedly asks what happened and Fushimi says just people being idiots, thinking fiction is reality. Yata decides he has to confess but imagine Fushimi’s just like ‘I know,’ Yata’s all wait how the fuck did you know and Fushimi scoffs as he says for a serial killer Yata’s a terrible liar (also he hopes Yata enjoyed the free advice, Fushimi figures he owes Yata one for killing his parents which is, after all, the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for him).

[lostinwalmartmymomleftme]

ANY CREEPYPASTA SQUAD HC??!?!?

I left them out of my first head cannons post and hope someone would ask me this:

Randy

He has incredibly poor vision, but obviously does not have the access to an optometrist that one would need if they have bad vision

Now I’m not saying he’s a horrible cook, but I’m not saying he’s a good cook either- He does cook like a middle-age Dad who just got divorced and his ex-wife did all of the cooking. But he is trying, I’ll give him that.

Honestly, I don’t think he has enough emotional awareness to recognize when he’s being flirted with (not that I think that anyone would, I just think that’s an interesting thing to think about)

I’m thinking ethnically, Randy is American (Most likely British Roots, BUT LIKE THIS MAN IS AMERICAN)

You cannot sit there and tell me this man does not get up at the ass crack of dawn. This man wakes up before the sun and he doesn’t happily, maybe even willingly.

Bobby

He has stabbed Hacker, and would do it again.

Randy has given the other two chores, Bobby’s least favorite is sweeping and mopping the floors. He HATES it.

In online games, he instigates. If there is a fight, he’s probably the one who started it, but he’s not a part of it.

I’m not gonna lie to you he probably sleeps in the fetal position

He is American-German/Japanese ethnically

Hacker

As for hackers ethnicity, I’m not entirely certain, I would almost say American-Korean/Russian

This man was a college student who hacked someone, you can’t tell me he doesn’t walk everywhere. He prefers not to drive actually-although out of the creepypasta squad, for certain reasons he is the best driver.

He seems like the type of guy to own several pairs of crocs.

His middle name is James. (Theodore James Bradford)

He has a shellfish allergy

Bonus: Finch

When he gets up in the morning, without fail, he gets tangled in the blankets and falls off the bed.

His favorite drink is hot chocolate, he doesn’t really care for coffee, though he will drink it

In his spare time he writes, primarily history books and they are published but he writes them under a pseudonym

He is allergic to cats, not like deathly allergic, but like severe swelling yk?

Now Finch, honestly, is the character I’m most nervous about forming a head canon for his ethnicity for but here I go:

Most likely an indigenous culture, perhaps Navajo?

Venezuelan

German

Cuban

Creole

[inspirationallybored]

Introductory Post

Hi everyone!

I feel like an introductory post was long overdue, so here it goes!

First of all, I am not a robot. I am, as a matter of fact, a very human person.

You can call me Starfish, or Ash (pseudonym for writing stuff). I am a cis female (she/her) in my teens. I am asexual, and currently bi-curious.

Studying science-related subjects in high school, but am also passionate about history, and of course, literature.

I have been writing poetry and short stories since elementary school (under my real name), and reading for as long as I can remember.

Some of my favourites:

Book series: Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Shadow and Bone (and Six of Crows), The Hunger Games

Stand-alone books: The Song of Achilles, The Little Prince, The Book Thief, Ela (it's by Sampurna Chatterjee, really underrated), The Girl who Drank the Moon, The Bell Jar

Movie: The Fault in our Stars

Musicals: Epic, Hamilton, Six (a lot of history, I know), Wicked

Anime: Bungo Stray Dogs, Spy x Family, Death Note (haven't watched too many animes, so no judgement)

****

I also like writing, and have two WIPs.

1. Stranger Friends- Two people become friends by sharing their deepest thoughts with each other, but never their identities.

Status- Planning

2. Beyond the Ripple Tides(title not finalised yet)- A new recruit in an elite magical enforcement service is tasked to find out about the stirring rebellion, but with the gap in everyone's minds, nothing's what it seems.

Status-Planning (need to sort some things out here)

I also post dialogue prompts and other stuff related to writing. Comments are much appreciated, it's nice to get feedback.

I will advocate about political and social issues, it's a part of writing, and it's a part of me.

I sometimes post about general stuff like life, it's rare but it's there.

****

Things I am perfectly fine with:

Almost everything! Opinion-related, or about interests, or WIPs (mine or others'), or stuff I don't know about, and more. Tumblr is a free space for discussion, right? So anything and everything is a-okay. It doesn't matter if it's from the other side of the world, it's ok.

I am perfectly fine with discussing about stuff that might be sensitive to some, like mental health, politics, war, etc.

Some things to be careful about (just in case anyone needs it):

No bigotry or discrimination allowed, including homo/transphobia and racism. Having opinions is ok, having prejudice is not.

No judging on difference of opinions, be respectful (again, unless someone is being a horrible person, then desecration is fine).

No NSFW stuff please, I am a minor (you get what I mean).

Avoid stuff related to financial transactions like asking money (again, I'm a minor, I don't have a bank account, and this is the internet so almost no one shares stuff like that).

Just a personal request, but please try to avoid asking for personal information for now (like my name or where I live). I will share what and when I am comfortable with sharing, but if I am not, kindly respect that decision.

Feel free to ask questions and share thoughts about anything. Nice to meet you all!

[saintskully]

for the asks: 1, 4, 8, and 26 for maralie!!!!

omggg thank you for asking these!! i am happy to answer them!!!!

I've yet to find a good voice claim for her!! She's got a bit of a weird accent, since she spent the first two decades of her life growing up in a small village west of Mournhold before she travelled all over Tamriel. She still mainly carries that fantasy semi-australian/british accent that most Dunmer have, but it's intermixed with a little bit of a Nordic (kinda Scandinavian?) accent. Her voice is a bit raspy and deep, like someone who has spent their life coughing, screaming, or smoking. She's also not very good at emoting, so she ends up coming across as monotone and bored sounding unless she is specifically trying to come across otherwise :)) Hopefully that makes sense!!

4. oh this one is hard!! I just spent an hour thinking about how to respond to this and I think RIVER. - SABELLA OFFICIAL is a really good one for them! i feel like it would switch between times and perspectives but i like the vibes of it a ton

8. Maralie is a very outdoorsy person and for sure prefers to spend her time outside, even if it means sitting on a rock in the sun to warm up :) She enjoys reading poetry and fiction, as well as keeping up to date on current events and remaining knowledgeable on history. She also writes her own poetry and prose, mainly themed around the macabre and some dry humor. She actually has a published under a pseudonym (it's M. Shrike), and she didn't even mean to publish it :)) It's a collection of her works and the only person who knows she's the one who wrote it is an old Nord woman who lives in Morthal who Maralie traded a copy of her poetry for some supplies and a couple nights of staying in her spare room! The woman loves literature and loved Maralie's writing style so she convinced Maralie to let her make and sell some more copies. In return, Maralie will always have a place to stay in Morthal free of charge (the old lady was being a bit slick and knew that she was clearly getting the better end of the deal by selling the copies, but maralie also didn't care much- just felt a bit flattered). In the end, only around 80 copies were made but it actually gained niche popularity that Maralie actually has no idea about. Cicero has one of her books and has no idea she wrote it for a long time until she publishes another book and includes several references to their time together (also served as a love confession on her end!)

26. I associate Maralie with tobacco, lilacs, and nightshade! I love a good purple flower and maralie smokes tobacco mixtures :))

[tobacconist]

i will always defend alex day/nerimon and i dont care what anyone says. literally what are the accusations? being sort of an annoying twat? being kinda bad in bed? sleeping around? (yeah, that last one is bad but cmon. thats what idiot teenagers do. he didnt need his life ruined over it.)

literally, if you know the name alex day you probably think 'that one time british youtube star? yeah i kinda remember but idk actually, i think he was a rapist or something? probably a pedophile rapist predator. thats what everyone says. idk but everyone hates him and he doesnt have an online presence anymore because idk actually i think hes buddhist now or smth? idc fucking rapist scum'

like, i understand completely how it happened (dont forget to be awesome!) there were soo many dirty fucking scumbags around in that era of youtube (and still are! more so, infact!) and like... seriously, im not trying to undermine the fact that there were (and are) actual predators on these platforms, or that he was close to them (dont forget to be awesome!) but so was LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE. it was fucking shameful how charlie, the vlogbrothers, everyone else just shunned him like that. youtube literally died that day, and if you dont believe me, try to find videos from that time. theyre gone. theyre all gone. they all want to forget about it.

i dont deny it was fucking scummy of him how he broke carries heart, or how he used his fame to get girls but... cmon. these were girls who were literally singing 'i want to be mrs nerimon' (iykyk) and flying from america to meet up with him. what 19yo dude who wants to be a famous musician wouldnt jump at that oppurtunity? im not saying he was/is a good musician btw. hes fucking awful.

but i actually beg everyone (who was there, digitally atleast, during the nerdfighter era and who remember those times. you know who you are. you guys who grew up with harry potter and loved it and hate yourselves for it today) ESPECIALLY those who hate him, to read his book 'living and dying on the internet' and try to hear it from his point of view. like, yes, obviously youre hearing the perspective of the annoying narcissistic twat we all know and love/hate, but also one who was one of the first vloggers in that wildwest era of youtube, who has a lot of insight, and who i believe really didnt do anything all that wrong, and even if he did has clearly fully repented in giving up his youtube career and everything. you can find it easily for free online, the book that is. its a good read.

i will say though that it was pretty scummy of him to publish the book having it detail his relationship with carrie (not explicitly, like) when she specifically asked him not to, and using pseudonyms to get around it, that was fucked up; but at the same time i cant fucking blame him! having all your friends suddenly turn on you to save their own reputations, everyone treating you as some evil monster for the smallest of human failings. i dont blame him for wanting to atleast give his side of the story.

idk, it really is a good example of the childish backbiting nature of the fandom-left i think, which WILL ultimately be its doom; and we all know it. and if you disagree with me, well, feel free leave a comment in the doobly-doo, and Dont Forget To Be Awesome!

[miirshroom]

An Elden Ring Word String Theory

I was thinking a bit about the anagrams of the name "Radagon". As it turns out "a dragon" is far from the only functional anagram that can be spun from this short 7-letter name. And on the one hand I understand the perspective that asks: why? Why make one name an anagram and no others? Or are words meaningless and we should look for anagrams in all Elden Ring names now? This would certainly contradict everything else I've found regarding how character and place names are selected for the sum total meaning of their syllables and translations, that leaves little room for more secret scrambled meanings. But here is an actual argument in favour of the anagrams of Radagon:

TOM MARVOLO RIDDLE

I AM LORD VOLDEMORT

One name split into meaningful anagrams is I think the only instance that FromSoft/GRRM would really need to bring into focus some parallels to a certain other story that called attention to a single plot important anagram. And it was in the name of the main villain of the book series. That and the way that both Radagon and Voldemort split their souls into 7 or so pieces (i.e. Great Runes) and were trying to become immortal. But a deep dive into the way that psychological alchemy can reinforce a toxic worldview dissociated from reality deserves a separate post. This one is about anagrams.

The Literary Tradition of Anagrams

Regarding Voldemort specifically, I did a search to confirm that I am correct that there is only the one anagram name, and the answer is - yes and no. If there is any other name that JKR cared to make an anagram of she only did so unofficially and using the English language. Fans have apparently found some odd plot coincidences buried in names from the mountains of sludge of possible anagrams - so who knows. Regardless, there is a self evident thing about making a declarative statement into an anagram rather than simply a scrambled name - it doesn't work across multiple languages. Which is awkward when the anagram features in a dramatic moment of the book. And so I did behold a list of Voldemort anagrams, with a few selections as below:

Tom Elvis Jedusor = Je suis Voldemort

Tom Sorvolo Ryddle = Soy Lord Voldemort

Tom Vorlost Riddle = Ist Lord Voldemort

Anton Morvol Hert = Archon Voldemort

Romeo G. Detlev Jr. = jeg er Voldemort

Marten Asmodom Vilijn = Mijn naam is Voldemort

Tom Gus Mervolo Dolder = Ego Sum Lord Voldemort

It's a strange solution to a manufactured problem. "Vol de Mort" has meaning - it is from French and translates to "flight of death". So paradoxically the "pseudonym" of the name cannot be compromised and seems to be what was selected first. The rest of the name exists in service of "Voldemort" - you can tease meaning from the name-shaped word of "Marvolo" but wasn't there an easier solution? What about "Tom V Rolde"? With that you get a whole middle initial to work with - maybe "Vincentius" or something. Perhaps "Thomas Vincent Enigma Rold" is also opaque enough with "Rold" passed off as a portmanteau of red-gold that suits the alchemy theme (that's a speculation on how Elden Ring uses it for the "Rold Lift Medallion"). There is a long literary history of authors using anagrams, and it is rare to find that they use filler words like the addition of "I am Lord". I imagine because they do things the logical way around for cause and effect and start with a mundane name that is then scrambled into the fake name. When we say that JK Rowling was never a very good writer, short-sighted anagram planning is just a drop in the bucket next to her regressive social politics, British colonial view of all countries outside of her home, and racial stereotyping word association used in the selection of other character names.

Often, but not always, anagrams are used for comedy - as in the way that Lemony Snicket uses anagrams - or a means of having a legally distinct name from some source material used as inspiration - think Da Vinci Code's "Teabing" being an anagram of "Baigent" - the man who popularized the psuedo-history that was then used for the thriller novel. Or else it's used in a fantasy and/or multicultural setting where exotic sounding nonsense names just blend into the other odd names - like "Dandelo" ("Odd Lane") the psychic emotion-stealing vampire who appears in the last volume of Stephen King's The Dark Tower series. And then again in Gulliver’s Travels, where “Tribnia” and “Langden” (Britain and England, respectively) are mentioned in passing in the section of the story dedicated to the voyage to Laputa, Balnibarbi, Luggnagg, Glubbdubdrib and Japan. Although there is something off about a name that is used by no person in the real world, few people will pause in the middle of reading to search and find that all results point to the fictional character (or even expect to find anything when placed beside sich an obvious fake name as “Glubbdubdrib”), so no drama is sacrificed. That's suspension of disbelief at work.

A Case for the Anagrams of Radagon

All this to say that there are writers out there who like to play with anagrams. And I think that perhaps the writers of Elden Ring took that concept to an extreme. In the examples above and most others it is one meaningful English language anagram extracted per name. In contrast, I'm currently at a count of 24 different anagrams of Radagon that are all consistent with other information from FromSoft’s body of work. Because I have been playing the FromSoft word games with other character names and I am not satisfied with just considering modern English. Archaic words, other languages, even abbreviations are on the table as far as I'm concerned. There are three that seem to me particularly strong evidence that "Radagon" is indeed a name with a multitude of anagrams that were spun out into characters and meaning throughout the history of the Lands Between: "D Aragon", "A Narog D" and "Gor Adan".

The first came about when I was browsing through the history of alchemy and witch hunts. The Dominican priest (i.e. "D") Nicholas Eymericus is best known for being the Inquisitor General of Aragon and for writing the Directorium Inquisitorum (1376) an instructional guide for identifying and prosecuting heresies including witchcraft. And here can be extracted another previously known facet of Radagon - as an Inquisitor who went out to hunt the witch Queen of Raya Lucaria. I see an immediate connection here to D, Hunter of Death, who has long been suspected of hinting at something about the dual nature of Radagon and Marika due their description along with D, Beholder of Death of being a single being in two bodies. And both have the very odd decision to be introduced as an initial rather than by name. In particular, D Hunter is on a mission to hunt down unnatural creatures. D Beholder directly calls Fia a "rotten witch". The idea of an Order of witch hunters is elevated from subtext to text with witch-hunter Jerren in his pursuit of the witch Sellen. And there's the symbolism in the hammer wielded by Radagon - another major text of the witch hunts was the Malleus Maleficarum (1486) or "The Hammer of Witches". Which itself has a direct line of connection in Recusant Henricus near the Limgrave Colosseum who drops the Hammer Talisman - Henricus Institor is the latinized name of the churchman and Inquisitor who wrote that book. It was swiftly denounced as heresy by the Church for its cruelty, but escaped containment and became well known after widely spreading among the people and secular courts.

And as for “A Narog D” that is a word string that seems meaningless at first glance, but I see it as the complement to Aragon D. Its significance came up while I was looking into Tolkein’s histories regarding the linguistic connections of Gelmir and Faroth. Contemporary with the War of the Silmarils, the Narog river passed through the area called “Taur-en-Faroth” or “the Hills of the Hunters” from its upstream origin point at the Pools of Ivrin. Also found in this area was the hidden underground city of Nargothrond, which was originally constructed by petty dwarves, then occupied by elves, and then turned to a dragon lair after its fall. And then sank into the ocean along with the rest of the continent at the end of the pre-history. So with the context of an underground city rendered inaccessible by time and the Narog river, “a Narog D” would be D, Beholder of Death, who is found in Elden Ring at the underground city of Nokron.

If there’s one name that I would give special attention it is "Adan Gor". Firstly the obvious: Adan is a Spanish variant of "Adam" - presumably with connotations of "Adam and Eve" - and "Gor" is a dialect version of "God", with well known uses including Moby Dick ("And, by Gor, none of you has de right to dat whale"). To get biblical for a moment it evokes the thought of the first Man Adam created in the image of God. The character “Adan, Thief of Fire” also incorporates the image of Prometheus bringing fire to humanity, having in his possession the Flame of the Fell God, which appears like the 3D orb of the sun. A merging of religious connotations on multiple levels, with a hint of the scientific in how the orb is reminiscent of the modern images that we can obtain of the sun and its corona. Element 61, Promethium, was so named at around the time that humankind first demonstrated the terrible power of the nuclear bomb. Radagon also rearranges to “and a Gor” - further emphasizing that Radagon was made in the image of a Creator and rose to be a “god” in his own right, in some fashion.

And that's neat, but "gor" is a versatile word and I think that it can be squeezed for more understanding of the nature of how Radagon modifies the conceptual Adam. In the German Ore Mountains dialect, "gor" means "refined" in the sense of metal or "cooked/ready for consumption" in terms of food. In Old Norse and Faroese it means "the old portion of food brought from the stomachs of ruminants to be chewed a second time". In Middle Welsh it means "over" or "next to". From Irish there are several along the lines of "to hatch, to heat, to burn, to inflame, to incubate, to brood". In Rohyngia it means "upwards" and in Slovene it means "do". Altogether, Radagon is not the base form of the first man, but one that has been grown and reiterated and improved upon over time. In German "gor" can mean "has agitated" or "has seethed". Seethewater Cave is found at the base of Mt. Gelmir filled with mushrooms and pests and deliberately sealed with two stonesword keys. What is sealed in this cave are items connected to the scarlet rot with which Radagon’s daughter Malenia is afflicted.

But there are still more meanings and I am going to go through every single one from Wiktionary. From Azerbaijani and North Kurdish there are "the grave/the afterlife". Radagon is man made in the image of his Creator, but what he is created for is to watch over an afterlife - hence the strong theming of death and graves in the Lands Between (and in Dark Souls and Bloodborne games as well, as will be apparent in the next paragraph - consider this a warning for spoilers ahead). In Old English "gor" means "dung" or "feces" and in Middle English "muck" or poetically a "weapon with a sharp point" like sword or spear, or the act of piercing with this weapon. Radagon is made in the image of his Creator that was a terrible god rooted in violent bullshit. This theming comes through strong in the Dungeater and Golden Tinged Excrement. And for a George RR Martin tie-in - see his novelette “Sandkings” which is a microcosm of this exact scenario. In Carribean Hindustani "gor" means "foot". How often is it a joke that Miyazaki loves rendering bare feet? In Armoured Core V the legs parts are named after mountains - characterized by solid foundations. In Elden Ring there is an interplay between various demigods who attempt to compensate for their failing feet. Feet are associated with deep roots and origins and agency and willpower.

For Welsh "gor" is a mutation of the word "cor" meaning "dwarf", "pygmy", "little urchin", "spider", "shrew". And this may perhaps be a hint to just how long FromSoft has known that they would be making a villain named Radagon. Because these can point directly to the oddly named Furtive Pygmy (a diminutive bald man who rather resembles Elden Ring's statues of man cultivating a single golden shoot from a tangle of sunflowers). Even a nod to "Patches the Spider" as he appears in Bloodborne, where Patches himself has been something of a multiverse traveler in FromSoft games dating back to Armored Core: For Answer (2008) and may even be a deliberate callback to a character from Shadow Tower Abyss (2003), and has himself been speculated to be a form of the pygmy. FromSoft has tended to work economically like this - if they find something deep in the catalog that they can call back to they will use it. In the anagram breakdown section below I can point directly to Kings Field (1994) as providing inspiration that was pulled all the way forwards to Elden Ring.

In Basque "gor" means "deaf". This synergizes well with the long-run running theme in FromSoft games that ringing bells allow communication with the past. It can even be seen in the title of the game - the Elden Ring. Because what is a man to do who is deaf and cannot hear the ringing? He must work through proxies - and the inherent drawbacks this has for communication. This theme of deafness comes into focus in Bloodborne with Ludwig the Accursed - who according to Occam's Razor is most likely named for Ludwig van Beethoven. It is from Ludwig that the FromSoft staple of the Moonlight Sword is received, and one of Beethoven's best known works is the Moonlight Sonata dedicated in 1802. Famously, from his late 20's and onwards - shortly after writing the Moonlight Sonata - Beethoven gradually lost his hearing and developed tinnitus (persistent illusory ringing), until he could no longer hear voices or music by 1812, but continued to compose even while on the edge of being totally deaf. An odd environmental occurrence early in the Old Hunters DLC is when a snail person drops from the sky, just before the whirligig saw pickup. The inner ear has the spiral shape of a snail shell. Bloodborne is more dense with bells than any other FromSoft game - I would hazard a guess that part of the madness of the Hunters is that they develop tone deafness and become unable to distinguish between the various beckons of bells that call them to hunt monsters and the ones that call to hunt fellow hunters.

And here's one more thought to shelve and see if it makes an appearance. There is at least one proper and complete name that I have extracted as an anagram: Gordana. It is a feminine Cyrillic name from the areas in and around present day Serbia and North Macedonia and from the word "gȏrd" meaning "proud". In the 300's BCE - at roughly the same time that Alexander the Great was active - present day Serbia was at the southern limit of the lands occupied by the Celts. Before the area was conquered by the Romans. It interests me that this name ends in the suffix "na". There is a quite large subset of names in Elden Ring with that suffix. And afterall, “burning the Erdtree is the first cardinal sin” which in the Catholic tradition is: pride.

Elden Ring and a Theory of Word Strings

And it can be said that this is all a matter of confirmation bias and that I am selecting meanings. Which is true. But I did spend a significant amount of time doing the research into the intersection of language, history and science that led to these conclusions. At risk of explaining badly (see acollierastro for an actual physicist's explanation), I think the point is that it's like String Theory of physics, but applied to word strings.

If I were to show an English speaker who has never engaged with Elden Ring a list of 400 anagrams ranging from "a dragon" to "a ag dr no" then there is a preference to latch on to the immediately identifiable word strings and dismiss the rest. It is only after experiencing the game and the many linguistic frameworks that it encompasses that the possibility for other significant word strings is revealed. To my understanding, string "theory" of physics is more of a validation tool for completing elegant math on already known parameters and outcomes. String theory is not predictive - and similarly the majority of word strings generated are likely meaningless. And so the 'Word String Theory of Anagrams' is - in the case of this one trickster character themed around mimicry - perhaps only useful as a way to validate character traits and connections that are otherwise intentionally obfuscated.

To tie the topic back to the contents of the game itself there is indeed a game item which alludes to String Theory, hiding in plain sight. In one of my previous posts I discussed the symbolism behind the Cracked Pot item with regards to physics Crackpots. Well, "String Theory" has generally proved to be an unsuccessful model of physics, such that anyone currently still taking it seriously as a "theory" rather than a mathematical tool might be described as a crackpot. The Roped Pot items in Elden Ring are not crafted with pot + contents + rope as one might expect, but instead with an item called string. String leaving behind it a trail of crackpottery.

String

Boasting no special qualities, this is merely a goodly length of string. Material used for crafting items. Often carried by demi-humans. Used to make certain items easier to use.

In fact, strings have always had a central importance in Elden Ring. The trailer for the original game showed fine strands of golden light strings trailing from Marika's Hammer, and DLC trailer has provided a recent reminder of the significance of "strings" in the narrative with the golden strands being manipulated by the central figure.

And words also have a power for those who are faithful. The Cipher Pata is a weapon retrieved from the Round Table Hold and is comprised of a string of words written in golden light.

Cipher Pata

One of the weapons originating from the Two Fingers. A formless sequence of ciphers comprise its blade, and as such no shield can repel it. Deals holy damage.

The furtive inscription appears to hang in the air; the language of light spoken by the Two Fingers.

Another significant component of this Theory of Word Strings is that it is also a multi-verse theory. Notice how I did not limit to just Elden Ring in the previous section discussing anagrams of Adan Gor. This is also tied directly back to the real-world reference point - providing a framework for the existence of multiverses was one of the things that people found exciting about String Theory.

Radagon Anagrams Examined

The first 3 anagrams were presented in such a way as to tie in directly with named characters in Elden Ring. Consider that a validation check or proof of concept. The remainder of these are used as launching points to discuss whatever concepts that I feel match most closely in Elden Ring and other FromSoftware games.

Several of these were previously covered in another post, but I browsed through a second time and enough more to add that for the sake of presentation I think that it's worth keeping the whole set in the text of this post.

"rand oga" - "rand" and "oga" are both Old English/proto-Germanic meaning altogether "on the edge of terror". As blacksmith Hewg says of Marika (who is Radagon): "The sheer terror of her…". In the deep FromSoft history, there was once a minor miner NPC character in King's Field (1994) called "Rand Ferrer" whose name means "on the edge of a blacksmith". Blacksmiths are creators, and have been explicitly equated in FromSoft games as the “Hands of God” at least dating back to Demon’s Souls, where blacksmiths Boldwin and Ed drop the fist weapons of this name.

"a dog ran" "a god ran" - the dog part is self explanatory as Radagon is described as a leal hound and here we see that Radagon was a dog god who fled - to borrow the language of Placidusax’ fled god. And there is a specific dog god who fits surprisingly well - Xolotl. From Aztec mythology, Xolotl is the dark personification of the planet Venus, which is the “gold star” in Japan. Also a god of fire (“heavenly fire”) and lighting, twins, monsters, misfortune, death, sickness, and deformities. The later half of that description fits well to the afflictions of Morgott/Mohg and Miquella/Malenia. Common depiction of Xolotl is as a dog headed man, sometimes with a blade in his mouth to symbolize death. This is echoed in the knife-dog design of the wolves of Radagon, but also the design of Gurranq. I am not certain if it is hearsay that Gurranq will place his blade in mouth when executing the Ground Rupture attack with both hands, but I do know that the Cinquedea dagger can be found after platforming below the Bestial Sanctum in Caelid and the item is sitting conspicuously posed in the open jaws of a broken beast pillar that has been knocked to the ground. Another feature of Xolotl depictions is to show him with empty eyesockets in acknowledgement of the time that Xolotl wept so much at the sacrifice of the gods required to start the motion of the newly created sun that his eyes fell out of their sockets. Every depiction of Radagon shows him with empty voids in the place of eyes, and this also extends to the depiction of 5 of the 6 stone imp masks obtainable in game - which are themselves evocative of the Aztec style of stone carving. Similar to the Norse god Loki (who I believe has many other parallels to Radagon), Xolotl is also characterized as a shapeshifter, and with his shapeshifting extends even further to becoming plants as well as animals. Conflating Radagon and Gurranq/Maliketh is something that I take for granted - after all Maliketh is the shadow of Marika and Marika is Radagon. 

"Ra Dagon" - "Ra" Egyptian god of the sun and "Dagon" the principal deity of the ancient Middle Euphrates region. Also the Lovecraftian Dagon fish god thing. There is a dense mythology around the sun throughout FromSoft’s games and only the faintest hint of Egyptian mythology in places such as Oceiros (Osiris) the Consumed King of Dark Souls 3, the eye of Horus used as emblem for the LYNX pilot Joshua O’Brien in Armored Core 4, and the appearance of scarabs in Elden Ring. I am guessing that this is so that it is hinted but not immediately obvious that characters with their eye of Ra open - the left side eye, from perspective of onlooker - have a close connection to the sun and characters with their eye of Horus open - the right side eye - have a close connection to the moon. The Euphrates region is referenced directly in Elden Ring with the copy of the Imago Mundi at the feet of the bearded tree man statues found in underground areas. And then there is the Fishing Hamlet in Bloodborne which seems a nod to the Lovecraftian story of “Shadow over Innsmouth” in which the inhabitants are worshipers of Dagon - in this case with Kos taking the place of Dagon. Unpacking intent here will likely lead to circular logic, but a broad guess is that Dark Souls as a series examines the eclipsed sun in tandem with Bloodborne examining the eclipsed moon.

"naga d'or" - "naga" is Hindu meaning "a member of a race of spirits recognized in Hinduism and Buddhism that have mingled superhuman and serpent qualities, are genii of waters and rain, and live in a subaqueous kingdom", and "d'or" is French meaning "of gold". There is a particular snarl with the Naga, as with all living religions, that it is rather disrespectful to invoke them by name as a beast to be slain in a fantasy context. But there are still many ways to use the aesthetic without the name, such as in the case of Mytha the Baneful Queen from Dark Souls 2 - a silver serpent-woman perhaps as counterpart to an absent gold king. After looking beyond the specific hinduism lens, an example of a being with mingled superhuman and serpent qualities can be found in the story of Eglė the Queen of Grass Snakes who lends her name to the Temple of Eiglay. Eglė herself was no serpent, but her husband was King of the Grass Snakes and could transform back and forth between man and watersnake. In the abstract, the Elden Beast seems to exist in a plane of endless water and is a creature of the Golden Elden Ring. Though it is also tempting to guess that this might be a DLC payoff one.

"Ra Gonad" - Ra is god of all of the sky (and earth and underworld), not just the sun. Venus was born of the testicles of Uranus - god of the sky - thrown into the sea. The second phase of Malenia's fight is styled as an allusion to Botticelli's "The Birth of Venus". So technically this one can work with Radagon as a link between his own father - the old god of the sky and/or sun - and his daughter Malenia.

"Agro DNA" - from the slang term "agro" meaning "aggressive". Perhaps that Radagon has an aggressive nature in his genes. He is something of a Beast.

"And Agro" - as in "Radagon and Agro" - the name of the horse from the Shadow of the Colossus (2005). Elden Ring similarly has the player form an attachment to horse. Notably, The Shadow of the Colossus was directly cited as an inspiration for Elden Ring. Perhaps even a response to it - that game is focused on preserving the life of a deceased maiden at all costs and has an inevitable grim conclusion at the end. In contrast Elden Ring lets the player choose wrong 5 out of 6 times, but there is still the 6th more hopeful choice once you learn to read developer intent - a choice that will try to break the cycle by moving past everything that has come before. Also, Elden Ring has 15 Remembrance Bosses in base game, which stops one short of the 16 Colossi that leads to that inevitable conclusion in SotC.

"Argo DNA" - Argo was the ship sailed by Jason to find the Golden Fleece. Note the golden sheep in the Altus Plateau area of Elden Ring. It is also the name of a gigantic constellation that was split into three parts in the modern day - thus Radagon's lineage is found in the stars. Afterall "It is said that long ago, the Greater Will sent a golden star bearing a beast into the Lands Between, which would later become the Elden Ring".

"Ag Ra don" "Ag adorn" - "Ag" is chemical short form for Silver, so "Ra dressed in silver", I suppose. One might recall that "Radagon" seems not to have been needed as an entity until going to Liurnia to confront a house of the moon (traditionally associated with silver). Also "Ag" derives from the French "Argent" and another major use of French that I've noted is in the name of "Seluvis" forming "se lu vis" meaning (probably with broken grammar) "To read one's own face".

edit: Perhaps donned silver in the sense of coated arms in the silver of skill to work memory stone. This being drawn from the Realm of the Elderlings.

"Argon AD" - "In the Year of our Lord, 18" - Argon was isolated in 1894 by William Ramsay ("Will I Am, Ram Say" - see Golden fleece above). It is element 18 on the periodic table and has a lavender/violet glow when placed in an electrical field, evocative of the visual used for gravity magic. Notable event in the year 18: "Winter – Germanicus Caesar arrives in Syria, as new commander-in-chief for the Roman East." I'm going to pull on Gideon Ofnir for this one, as he is partly named for the Germanic god Odin and also the visual of his intro screen echoes the opening of the Shakespeare play Julius Caesar: "lend me your ears, I come to bury Caesar". Much of Radagon’s concern in Liurnia seems to have been involved with refining the purple gravity magic, judging by the scholars who use in Rennala’s fight, the Alabaster Lord on the grounds, the hands using it at Caria Manor, and Radahn’s overall skill set. As mentioned in a previous post about Loki, it makes sense for Gideon to have also been around at the time.

"ad argon" - "Ad" is a Latin modifier as in the case of "ad absurdum" or "to the point of absurdity" and etc (much like this post!). "Argon" is a Greek word meaning "lazy" or "inactive". Overall perhaps stretches to "to the point of stagnation"

"Argon Da" - Argon is an obscure semi-canon character in Tolkein's Legendarium but his father is King Fingolfin who is known for wielding an icy sword called "Ringil" that he used to cut Morgoth's foot and cause him to be lamed (many characters in Elden Ring with this condition). In Elden Ring, the icy blade called the “Frozen Needle” is found in the Kingsrealm Ruins. Ringil is also the name of a mountain stream in the area called "Taur-en-Faroth" which was already discussed above, but an added note here would be that Fort Faroth is where Radagon's soreseals is found.

"A Angrod" - Another Tolkein reference - Angrod is the Sindarin form of “Angaráto” meaning “champion”. Thus “A Angrod” means “O Champion!”. The character Angrod belongs to the “Golden House of Finarfin” and is nephew of the previously mentioned Fingolfin. Radagon first appeared as a Champion of the Golden Order.

"A Do Rang" - FromSoft has a recurring thing about bells. "do" is a syllable used in the Solmization music scale: do-re-mi-fa-sol-la-ti. After "ti" the scale wraps back to "do" again for a full octave. So the "do" rings at the beginning and end, at the start and at the eighth note. Perhaps hints to Radagon's involvement with the 4 Belfries and the Mausoleum bells in Liurnia, at the eighth era corresponding to the octave. And it is an open question as to how many characters may have meaning embedded in their names relating to the musical scales. Dolorus could easily also correspond to the eighth. Farum to the fourth. Miquella to the 3rd and 10th.

"a DGN aro" - DGN is an representation of the Egyptian word meaning "dwarf" or "pygmy". "Aro" is Spanish for "ring". A pygmy ring. This one actually brings more to mind the Ringed City DS3 DLC, since that game also teases the Egyptian connection with Oceiros ("Osiris"). And the Ringed City being euphemistic of the City of Gold (the alchemical symbol for gold is a ring) that Spanish Conquistadors tried to find in the Americas.

"Aaron G-D" - Specifically Aaron Kosminski - a man who was one of many suspected of being Jack the Ripper, though never formally convicted. He suffered from aural hallucinations and was committed to a psychiatric facility for a separate event. I learned of these recently through the video "The Enduring Mystery of Jack the Ripper" by LEMMiNO. Three connections here to Bloodborne: 1) One of the questions of the Ripper was "does he or does he not have medical knowledge?", which suits the medical theme of Bloodborne presented by Charred Thermos. 2) Aural hallucinations. I find this to be a theme in Bloodborne where the various types of bells are representative of tinnitus (relating to Ludwig van Beethoven being afflicted with this - see "Adan gor" above). 3) Kos. Kosm-. Kosminski. In Yiddish "Kos" means "goblet" or "cup", and may have been an occupational name for someone who makes glasses or cups. Minski has meaning of "from Minsk" which is a city in present day Belarus. The Nemiga river that flows through Minsk was buried in the early 1900's (diverted through underground pipe culverts), and its name means in Lithuanian "the river that never sleeps". As for the "G-D" this aligns with one of the abbreviations of God commonly used in Jewish print, but keeping on the aural theme these are also musical notes.

"Rán goad" - Rán is a Norse goddess and personification of the sea. Her name has come up a few times in FromSoft's body of work ranging from Ciaran ("who is Rán?") to Ranni ("Rán not/Rán two"). A goad is an English word meaning "long pointed stick used to prod animals (typically cattle)", or a Scots word for "god", or Swedish for "had tricked someone to a place and then beat up or murdered them". Taking Ranni as a manifestation of Rán, this could allude to Radagon manipulating Ranni into the state of mind where she would want to carry out the dual assassination of Godwyn and herself. Note that Ciaran's Gold Tracer blade resembles the Blade of Calling that is held by Melina (with minor differences at the hilt), who herself is noted to have similarities to the Black Knife Assassins. It could simultaneously refer to a much older event that was alluded to with the cut mimic tear quest. In the abstract, the previous "Rán" was tricked into shedding her aspect of water and adopting the persona of a fire giant - a form of ego death or murder of self to appease a god of fire.

"a grand O" - oh Elden Ring

"a dragon" - I think that the Elden Beast is a fine example of a dragon. The dragon is also a symbol of the never-ending cycle of alchemy, as both prime materia and the end product. The dragon is endlessly splitting into brother and sister parts and recombining into the divine hermaphrodite - so says Carl Jung in CW12 "Psychology and Alchemy". And the connection that I make personally is that the red-haired Rand al'Thor as ‘The Dragon Reborn' is the main character of the Wheel of Time books (1990-2013), whose name means "on the edge of a god" because that's really just his whole character arc in a few words. What does it mean to be “The Dragon” in the Wheel of Time? This is revealed quite early, but in the kind of offhand way that only makes sense in hindsight: "The land is one with the Dragon, and he is one with the land". The Dragon is the amnesiac avatar of the Creator (in this case, the author) experiencing his own Creation. When the Dragon suffers the landscape physically undergoes a Breaking and years of chaotic weather patterns - but when he achieves balance he has the Deus Ex Machina power to cause improbable good fortune wherever he goes. The last obstacle at that point is to confront the Shadow that has been the source of the suffering - see Jung again. One of the two most significant supporting characters is a blacksmith named for the god Perun - another hammer wielding god that stands a lateral shift to the side of Thor. Although Thor may wield a hammer to protect or destroy, he is not known for craftsmanship - thus requiring another aspect in the blacksmith who completes acts of creation. There may be only one author avatar elevated above the rest, but all characters that an author creates are splinters of their own thoughts. See also above usage of “Rand Ferrer'' - my guess is that this is one of the deepest literary influences for everything that FromSoftware has ever produced.

Conclusions

I believe that the name of “Radagon” and only that one name is intentionally used as a cornerstone around which much of the worldbuilding was completed. For multiple games leading up to and including Elden Ring. I believe this because it is more interesting than the belief that all of these incredibly specific coincidences are unplanned. Radagon is the villain after all, and symbolic of all of the faults of the Lands Between. If there is one thing that anagrams are good for, it is generating fantastic nonsense, as in the supposed case of "Naga d'or" or "Argo DNA". It's a shortcut to creating a surprise twist ending. It might be said that FromSoft/GRRM went hard into making a web of cause and effect to justify the twist when working backwards with the knowledge of hindsight - but in the worst case I can see this being used as a crutch. Perhaps as a prompt generator by an author who isn't sure what to do with a character and uses anagrams to inject "noise" into an otherwise formulaic story. Rather than having considered psychologically motivated reasons for their actions, it would be a way to get a character to do something unexpected to generate drama. It strips away causality and meaning for the sake of "originality".

Unfortunately, words and literature are messier and more ambiguous than the mathematical models we use to describe the physical properties of the real world. I can suspect that at least some of the worldbuilding of Elden Ring was influenced by selecting anagram word strings and spinning meaning from them, but it is still is not an explanatory theory of everything. The flaw of string theory is that it cannot make predictions and cannot be proved. As much as FromSoft may pretend that Elden Ring exists in a parallel universe to all other game franchises that they have created in the spirit of the parallel worlds predicted by string theory (and I know that this is by no means a popular theory in the fandoms), that too is a lie. There is only one universe - the real world in which a videogame company creates fantastical worlds “from software”. Which is probably why the closest I've gotten to actually piecing together the FromSoft metanarrative is by consulting my absurd spreadsheet that lists the initial release date of basically every game made by FromSoft and tracks information and trends for each date - zodiacs, tarot, moon phase, etc.

The year 2007 corresponds to tarot #7 - The Chariot - which represents "overcoming challenges and gaining victory through maintaining control of your surroundings". In a move never seen before or since, the only two original IP's that FromSoft released in the year 2007 were word puzzle games called Nanpure VOW and Iraroji VOW. And since this is the year after the release of Armored Core 4 - for which I find the "Lynx" AC's to be referenced in the "Loux" of Hoarah Loux and thus correlated with Godfrey's rise to Elden Lord - the year of word games is perfectly positioned for the origin of 'Radagon' as an entity riddled with anagrams.

[chordsykat]

10 Facts About Me

Rules: Share 10 facts about yourself and tag 10 other blogs! I want to get to know my mutuals, and the people I follow a little bit :) The facts can be about anything!

Tagged by @feeshies :D

Tagging: Anyone who wants to do this, too!

I had one of the first Sonic OCs on the internet - Ruby the Echidna. She was my stand-in avatar, since I was young and didn't want to share my name. Ruby made her debut sometime in 1995-1996 or so. You're welcome, internet.

My favorite board fame is Cthulhu Wars. My favorite faction is the Black Goat.

I'm afraid of lightning. It makes me uneasy to be out in lightning storms, even in a vehicle.

I can count the number of fandoms I've been in seriously on one hand. I don't fall into them easily, but I tend to be a casual in a wide variety of shows/movies/books/etc. I just like good stories.

I have credentials. I'm a licensed laboratorian by way of the American Society for Clinical Pathology and also a certified Grief Counselor. I'm also a Reverend and have performed a couple dozen weddings. I really only use the credentials when writing my sexy novels for Amazon Kindle under my pseudonym, though... Rev. Rowdy Randy Randallson.

The first CD I ever bought was an Elton John CD. It was The Lion King Soundtrack.

The last CD I ever bought was an Elton John CD. It was The Union.

I am a polytheist.

I was just told (today) my voice is the most gender-neutral that someone's ever heard. This is now my greatest super power.

I guard my mental health with my life. Take it from an old lady - if you're having a hard time, take care of your mental health, first. I didn't do this for over 30 years because I didn't know how. If you don't know how to do this, find out, as soon as possible, what kind of ways you can help your mental stability. And exercise the ways you guard that stability, daily. Let no one stand in your way. Understand it takes work but it's worth it and it gets easier. There is nothing more important in this goddamn world.

[triviareads]

Releases May 23rd

Summary:

Cecile Trembley is a French markswoman who makes her living running a circus. She and Guy Darlington used to be lovers, but when Guy wanted to set her up as his mistress, she broke off their relationship and all contact. Now Guy has returned, sans fianceé, sans title, and he wants Cecile back too. And he's willing to do anything to win her over again.

Some background:

I came into this book with high expectations because I am a fan of Minerva Spencer's (and a bigger fan of her pseudonym she uses for erotica, S.M. LaViolette). Her plots are always excellent, the sex is usually pretty great too, and there's always something a little subversive about them. Reading the blurb for The Dueling Duchess convinced me it would be along the same vein, so I was excited to start.

My review:

I knew it was a good sign when I read that the heroine was thirty-six, (the hero was four years younger). More mature heroines is definitely something of a pattern I'm seeing in historical romances (recently in The Portrait of a Duchess by Scarlett Peckham and The Countess by Sophie Jordan), and I personally really enjoy it because it usually means the heroine is more level-headed in her approach to intimacy and sex because they have experience.

The plot can be summed up by "Titled Man joins circus to find a friend's relative during the Hundred Days, has affair with markswoman, they part ways unhappily, but now he's back because he needs a job". It's a little convoluted but also, I've long since stopped caring about how improbable a story is since this is historical romance and all I need to be sold on is the romance of it all (and I ABSOLUTELY was). The structure goes back and forth: a "present" section, then a "past" section where we see how Guy and Cecile first met, and another "present" section where most of the plot occurs, and we see what happened after the fallout of Cecile and Guy's affair, and what happens why Guy is rehired as a stagehand (which does involve getting shot at by his ex-lover.... multiple times a day) in the circus just so he can win back Cecile. Honestly, I respect that level of desperation.

SPEAKING of desperation, I appreciate that this was pretty much a book-long grovel. As far as the egregiousness of Guy's actions, it was pretty standard aristocratic fare ("I can't marry you because Money so will you be my mistress?" *cue slap in the face), but Cecile's feelings matter too, right? So when the tables have turned, you really can't fault Cecile for taking advantage. And hey, he consents to the menial labor and whatnot.

Something else I also appreciated was that Cecile does, in fact, have a lover during the time Guy is trying to "woo" her back while working for her. It's very "how the turns tables" of Minerva when it comes to genre conventions. It's not like Cecile is with Guy at the time, right? She has the right to do as she pleases, and if that means aggressively making out with this other man in front of Guy even after rejecting other man's marriage proposal, then so be it.

The sex:

Fabulous. Fantastic. Well-written. Hot. The give-and-take they have going on during sex is great. She's a little imperious and a little bratty at once. He's a little unhinged but also definitely likes being ordered around. There's roughness and there's tenderness where it fits (and "good girl". There is many a "good girl"). It was the best I've read in a long while.

Overall:

I adored this book and would strongly recommend it for anyone looking to read a regency romance set outside the ballroom. It's a book that definitely keeps you on toes all the way. Apart from the romance (which I loved loved loved), I also like how Minerva interwove feminism and the very real trials of being a woman, in this case a female business owner, in that era. There's also a significant found family vibe (the circus is pretty much one big family, plus Guy and Cecile take in a street urchin) in this book, and Minerva did a great job of setting up her next book The Cutthroat Countess, which I'm very excited to read next.

Thank you to Kensington Books and NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for my review.

[tarlos-spain]

I'm so excited to start posting this work. I have to say that if it exists is thanks to @fandomtrumpshate and it's thanks to @trickzill-art that decided to ask me for an original work.

So here it is.

Summary: Santi has had the luck of writing a best seller, but now, a year later, seems like he can't come up with anything else. Not until he met Joseph, a young barista with big dreams for the future. Thanks to him, Santi finds new motivation, just like Joseph is reminded of what is really worth fighting for.

Chapter 01

Santiago took the book from the shelf. "The Beat of a Rebel Heart" was the title his publisher had recommended for his first novel. It had seemed stupid, he had tried to come up with his own ideas but none of them had convinced the publisher.

"You've decided to launch yourself on the market under a pseudonym, I think it's perfect." Oliver, his publisher, had told him when they were talking about the promotion of the first novel. "But that also takes away your visibility. You'll never be Santiago Carreras, the young promise of gay young adult novels. If all goes well, your book will have a movie on Netflix or Hulu, but no one will link it to anyone but Berta Carros. Are you sure by the way with that name?"

"It was my grandmother's name, she got me started writing, she read my first stories and told me I had talent, while my father told me I wouldn't get anywhere with words. I owe it all to her."

"Ok, Berta Carros it is, then...I still think we could find something more commercial like Vanesa de la Fuente or something like that."

"It doesn't impress me that you call my book whatever you want." Santiago told him. "But my pen name won't be touched."

The book had been a success. Sales were higher than other books of the same style or so Oliver had told him, after all Santiago didn't care about those kind of numbers; his passion was writing, he had his first book for sale and by the looks of it a huge part of the potential audience for stories about gay teens liked it.

Soon half the bookstores in the city had copies of his book and New York was full of bookstores everywhere. Amazon picked up on the success and sales of the digital version began to climb and not just in English. His book was selling in Spanish, Italian, Portuguese, French and German.

Within months, the name Berta Carros had fan pages on Facebook, Tumblr and one day, Sandra, his best friend, sent him some links to some well-known sites where people were writing fanfiction. They had started writing things with his characters, Robert and Myles.

He put the book back on the shelf, although he moved it to the right place. Someone had put it in the romance section, along with Wild Love at the Ranch and The Executive and the Carpenter.

No one remembered his book anymore, it had been an incredible few months, but it was over as quickly as it had come. A year later, Berta Carros was only remembered by the few remaining fans of his book, those who were waiting for a sequel that Santiago knew would never come and those who wondered when Berta Carros would release his second book for sale.

Oliver, his publisher wondered that too, almost every day now and that day when he heard and noticed the vibration of his phone in his pocket, he realized it was no different.

"O. Talbot" was written on the screen of his phone. He stepped out of the bookstore, took a sharp breath and answered the call.

"Santiago, my boy, how's it going?"

"Oliver you called me yesterday, I assure you my life hasn't changed at all."

"Hmmm, I'm not going to say I like hearing that, but tell me you're still writing."

"I'm still writing, yes, but I can't confirm to you that I have Berta's next book in hand."

"Do you know when that will be?"

"Oliver, you ask me that same question every day and you know what the answer is.”

"Yeah, yeah. You don't function well under pressure, but Santiago, a year ago you decided to enter the world of literature and as romantic as writers' lives may have seemed in the past, we all have a deadline now, I as an editor have a minimum number of books to submit to those at the top and for that, you writers have to submit your manscripts to me. It's a chain that has to work perfectly."

"I know and I'm sorry. I'm trying to come up with the perfect story. I don't want to write something mediocre or...."

"Santiago, boy." He hated it when Oliver or anyone else called him that, with that tone of superiority. "We're talking about books that sell to teenagers and adult women who..."

"Oliver. I wrote my first book to tell my own story of that teenage boy who does coming out, who stands up to his parents, who shows them who he really is, and who falls in love."

"Yeah, yeah, it was a very nice and sentimental book, I won't deny it." Oliver said and then there was silence. Santiago figured he was looking for the best words not to bother him anymore and not gamble that he would go to another publisher with his new book, when he had it written. "What I wanted to say is that I'm not asking you to write the new Divine Comedy, it doesn't even have to be a book as special as your first novel. I just need Berta Carros to have a new book on the market for the Christmas campaign, do you think that would be possible?"

"Well, it's nine months."

"Exactly it's like a pregnancy, it's going to be our baby, Santiago, boy."

Santiago felt like cutting the call short when he heard that. Oliver Talbot wasn't his favorite person in the world, but he was the one who had put his trust in him with his first book. He owed him that much.

"I guess I can make an effort and get something out."

"Would you have a general idea for the day after tomorrow?"

"The day after tomorrow?" Santiago asked, stopped in the middle of the street and stared at nothing. "Well, I guess I can get a couple of days out and we can discuss them."

"Great! That was precisely what I wanted to hear. Talk to you in two days."

Oliver cut the call short almost before Santiago could say goodbye.

After the call he needed a coffee, a large one just the way he liked it, with cream, cinnamon, lots of vanilla and chocolate chips. He was not far from his favorite coffee shop, the place where he had found much of the inspiration to write his first novel.

He was sure that there he could find what he needed to get his second book off the ground.

But first he needed a coffee.

It was almost noon when he entered. In the mornings and especially on weekends, the Finca del café was a busy place because of the number of cyclists, teams, families and friends who passed by for breakfast. But at noon like now, the café was usually emptier and quieter, the perfect place to sit with his computer next to the coffee he so desperately needed.

He didn't have to look at the coffee list, he didn't need to in order to make his exact request. He walked up to the counter, he knew all the baristas that worked there. Connor usually took note of what he wanted and often didn't even ask him what he wanted because he already knew them.

"What can I get you?" said an unfamiliar voice that made him look up.

A pair of green eyes, a luminous smile and slightly tousled light brown hair completed him over a tag with Joseph's name buttoned to the shirt.

The barista was new, or at least, he had never seen him before. He would certainly remember him, because he was the most handsome man Santiago had seen in a long time.

"Chocolate mocha, not too hot."

"To go?"

"No, I'll take it here, I usually spend a lot of mornings here, working."

"Oh," Joseph picked up one of the cups and a marker, with an even wider smile on his lips. "That sounds like you're a big shot. Writer looking for inspiration for his next book? Have you written anything I might have read?"

"I had a book out last year. It had some success, but I don't think you know it. Plus I wrote it under a pseudonym."

"I read a little bit of everything. Come on, test me, maybe I’m making your coffee and I’m a fan of yours, even if I don’t know it."

Santiago reacted with a nervous chuckle at the barita's charming laugh.

"I don't think so, but okay. "The beat of a rebellious heart."

Joseph was filling the coffee cup with the milk and then the foam, but stopped short and looked up to Santiago and stared at him like someone looking at an impossible apparition of a ghost.

"You're not serious." Joseph sentenced. "You haven't written that book, because "The Beat of a Rebel Heart" is written by a woman, Berta Carros and I can't wait for her to write her next book."

"That's a long way off because Berta doesn't even have an idea for her next novel."

Joseph opened his mouth, but closed it and gasped again like a fish sticking its head out of the water. He stood there, staring at Santiago as his boss tried to get his attention from the other end of the bar.

"Wait, you are serious. You wrote 'The Beat of a Rebel Heart'. You're Berta Carros."

Santiago put a finger to his lips. He hated having used that name, hated having had that stupid idea to create the pseudonym for himself. At first he hadn't been proud to write a novel for teenagers, no matter how much it was a story of two boys falling in love and then it had caught the critics' attention because of the realism Berta had demonstrated. By then, Berta Carros had made a name for herself with her first book and Oliver Talbot had thought it a good idea to keep her there and use the same pseudonym on subsequent books.

Joseph set the cup of coffee in front of him, one twice as big as he had ordered and as he was about to say something to the barista, the barista put a finger to his lips smiling.

"I've already told you that you're my favorite author. It's a gift."

Santiago accepted it as Joseph went to make the next coffee, retired to his usual table, put down his coffee, pulled out his computer and headphones, put his cell phone on charge and took a seat.

He stood there for a moment watching the barista work, talking to his colleagues, laughing, being charming to the customers and not noticing that there were two girls in line waiting to be served by him, amidst the silly giggles at how much they liked the barista.

He opened the computer and looked at the blank page of the blank document he had not yet started working on. He took a deep breath, he had been having small panic attacks for days at the thought of trying to write something for his new story.

And suddenly, the image of Joseph about ten years younger appeared in front of him, as if from a movie. Teenage Joseph, full of dreams, wanting to be... Joseph wanted to help everyone, in high school wanting to make everyone around him happy. That Joseph wanted to be a doctor... no, a veterinarian.

Little by little his new protagonist began to take the shape of the green-eyed barista with the perfect, radiant smile in front of him.

"A latte and a chai tea, please." Said a woman in a suit to Joseph as she gestured towards the table where her partner was seated.

"Good morning Susan, are you setting up a meeting with the folks in New York?"

The woman gave him an uncomfortable look because the barista was talking to her beyond too hot or not hot enough that she wanted coffee. She nodded nervously and paid to walk away to the end of the bar where her order was to be delivered.

"Why do you keep trying?" Amara leaned on the counter next to Joseph and rubbed his back. "People don't want to talk about their private lives with you. You're not their friend and they don't expect your advice over coffee, unless it’s about the perfect cookies to take away."

"But it's so cold, Mar. When I imagined myself working here behind the bar, I imagined I knew the people, many would be the same every day at the same time and that would gradually give us some familiarity."

"You've seen a lot of movies, haven't you?"

"It's not that. It's my dream, that's the kind of coffee shop I want to work in, the one I want to have."

Amara laughed and patted him on the back a couple of times. "So now you want to have your own coffee shop, and where are you supposed to get the money for that?"

Joseph sighed and went on with his work, there were already several glasses and cups to clean on the pike and tables to tidy up.

Most people didn't understand how he could really like that job. Everyone thought that if someone started working as a barista it was because they were waiting for their life's work, because they were studying, because they came from another city, and if it was someone young enough it was because they had left home or it was their first job.

But none of those possibilities fit Joseph.

Joseph was happy there. He was happy getting up early to open and serve the first coffees as winter dawned, discovering the new items that were invited from the central office for each season and was extremely happy drinking pumpkin spice at Halloween until the Christmas coffees arrived.

He loves coffee, and had managed to squeeze a couple of his own recipes into the cookie section.

Of course his friend was right about one thing. Money was a problem, both to study something related to the world of coffee and to open his own place someday.

But he had time and was saving. Everything he earned working there was going to two places, the rent for the apartment he shared with the fireman in 252 who he barely saw because they had crossed shifts and for that dream he slept with every night, getting into hotel school to learn everything he needed to learn to one day open his own café and have everyone fall in love with the world he saw.

A grunt from the writer's table caught his attention. He saw him sigh and close the computer then turn back to the window.

There was no one waiting to order anything at the counter so Joseph decided to take his morning break. He made his coffee as no one else knew how to do, because no one else understood the amounts of milk, lactose free because he was intolerant, sugar, brown, because it was healthier, cinnamon, you always needed some and cream... any decent coffee should have some in it and walked over to the table.

"Upset?" he asked and Santiago turned to him. "I'm not going to ask for your autograph, relax, but I am looking forward to the release of your second book and I'm dying of curiosity to know if it will be a continuation of "heartbeat" or something new."

Santiago laughed nervously, picked up his now empty coffee cup and wrinkled his nose as he realized it was.

"Shall I make you another?"

"You don't want to see me on a caffeine high and that certainly won't be how I start writing anything. No thanks. As for the new book, I'd like to know what it's going to be, too, although the one who's most curious is my publisher, who's about to fire me if I don't get the first draft to him in a few days."

"Wow, sorry to hear that and sorry then that I'm bothering you at the moment of inspiration."

Santiago let out that nervous laugh again, which this time made Joseph smile because he thought it was charming. He opened the computer again and turned it over.

Prologue

My name is Josh, although here at the hospital I am known as Josh "Dr. White's son." My father is the head of the emergency room at New York Presbyterian Hospital and a dozen doctors and twenty-odd nurses work for him.

They all know me, some of them literally were present at my birth and my father says that the most senior nurse in the hospital was the one who helped me cry for the first time.

As "Dr. White's son" I am free to move around wherever I want, except for the operating rooms, although the truth is that I am not too interested in seeing how they open people up, manipulate their organs and fill everything with blood.

But in the rest of the hospital I can go from one place to another without anyone looking at me funny. They all greet me, ask me about my father when they haven't seen him for a few days and ask me, as usual, if I'm going to follow in Dr. White's footsteps and study medicine.

However, today no one approaches me. Maybe it's because it makes them uncomfortable to see me crying inconsolably and they don't know what to say to me, maybe it's because my clothes are a mess, literally scorched, with a couple of holes from pulling and my hair as if I had fought with a herd of angry cats or maybe it's because they don't like the presence of my companion, Jaime, a wonderful Mexican boy who has gotten me into the best trouble these past few months.

Until recently I wouldn't have realized that there are people who look at you because of the color of your skin, the way you talk or any stupid detail that makes you look like one thing or another. But these last few months have opened my eyes, made me realize that the world I was living in was nothing more than a fantasy.

And you know what is the most ironic thing of all, tomorrow is my birthday, tomorrow I turn eighteen. just a year ago, I had the perfect life, the perfect dream, the perfect idea of the future, not to mention the perfect boyfriend, the perfect father and the perfect house.

If you ask me right now what I mean by perfect, my answer is to see my father walk out of the emergency room with a calm expression and hear him say that the heart of the love of my life has started beating again.

"It's horrible isn't it?" Santiago asked and finally breathed again when Joseph looked up from the computer. "I think I'm going to delete it and start over. I don't think..."

"I hope you don't mean that. You just wrote this?" Santiago's eyes widened in shock at the question. "I mean... I don't think it's little, well yes, it's very little and I love it, I want to know what happened to Josh."

A small smile added to the blush on Santiago's cheeks.

"It's the first thing that came to my mind, which is already saying a lot because I had been in the dry dock of inspiration for almost five months. what is it about this place? Because if it has any secrets, I'll come write here every day."

Joseph shrugged, looked back towards the counter, he didn't want any customers to be left waiting, certainly his manager wouldn’t like that either. But for the moment, Amara seemed to have it under control and motioned for him to take his time.

"You're the first writer I've seen here writing, so I don't know what inspired you. But I do know that many of the customers who come through here have told me that the coffee I make is the best they've ever had."

"I agree with them on that." Santiago looked back at the empty cup. "And for that coffee you make I'd like to come back here every morning."

They stared into each other's eyes for a moment, until a group of teenagers entered the coffee shop. They were on their way to class and were talking loud enough to disrupt the peace and quiet of the place.

Santiago looked at the time. He had decided to take the morning off to find that idea he needed so badly. Now he had it, it was just a written page, but suddenly his brain was overflowing with ideas that he had to put down on paper.

He stood up with force, so much that he almost knocked the chair to the floor.

"I have to go."

Joseph watched him dart out of the cafeteria, computer under his arm and open backpack full of papers, two or three notebooks and a few other things he hadn't gotten to see. He still couldn't believe he had met the author of his favorite book. When he had woken up that morning he had not imagined that Berta Carros was a man, someone so handsome, nice, attractive and that he would not be able to get him out of his mind.

[aaeoluss]

sorry to cheat on you nano wip but i’m thinking more and more about getting back to pseudonyms and i am,, So Excited 

[prettyboyeddiemunson]

omfg plss idk what your thoughts for p⭐️ eddie are but the thought of him doing it and making SCHMONEY and having the nickname the freak for good…..makes me nutz…….

HE WOULD MAKE SO MUCH MONEY EYE—

he would be a really popular one, i’m thinking. his movies sell like crazy, he’s very in demand, he’ll do pretty much anything on camera, so nothing is off limits for him. any sex act, any type of adult movie, he’s open to everything and it makes him a very sought-after star. he definitely no longer struggles financially, either; baby boy is rich now because of the movies he’s doing. and yes, he would have the nickname “the freak” for good, because of what he’s willing & excited to do in the industry. “the freak” is how he’s known in the industry, among directors, producers, and other stars.

i’m trying to think of a good p**n star name for him, though! the vampire slut in me wants to say something vampy, because he gives off the vampire vibes and the spooky vibes to many who know him. i also wanna say that if he’s a star when the dark tower books come out, he’s gonna take eddie dean as his pseudonym. he’s a nerd and i know he would love those books, and yeah, he is identifying hardcore with eddie fucking dean. he’s also a cheeky fuck, so i could see him using dracula or something in his name. but for now, I’m going with eddie dean, unless & until I think of something better!

and piercings? he’s got ‘em! tongue, nipples, possibly some kind of genital piercing, but the first two for sure. he also has more tattoos than what we saw in canon, but not many. i can see maybe a couple more arm tats, maybe two more torso tattoos, and a thigh tattoo. he still looks the exact same—long dark hair, breathtaking bambi eyes, same fashion sense when he’s not working on a set. it works well for him, though: he’s pulling men & women left and right, he’s going to parties, he’s dating supermodels, he’s living his truly best life as a p**n star.

which we all know will get even better the moment you walk into his life, because goddamn, he’s never met a girl like you. someone who doesn’t care who he is, someone who gives him a chase & a challenge, someone who won’t take his or anyone else’s shit. fuck, he’s head over heels the moment he sets eyes on you, and he has to have you. nothing else will do; he will quit the industry, if he has to. that’s how desperate he is to have you in his life.

oh, and lastly, we gotta talk about how…gifted he is inside those pants. this man is huge, like he has a hot demand for a reason. it’s his skills, too, and his abilities to do anything that’s asked of him, but his dick? nine inches long at least, pretty good girth, and he knows how the fuck to use it. it’s brought him this far, and is going to take him even further, i’m telling you.

[books]

Writer Spotlight: Olivie Blake

Olivie Blake (@olivieblake) is the pseudonym of the writer Alexene Farol Follmuth, author of multiple novels, anthologies, graphic novels, and film scripts, many of which involve the fantastic, the paranormal, or the supernatural. Her works revolve around the collective experience, what it means to be human (or not), and the endlessly interesting complexities of life and love. Cult-favorite The Atlas Six was re-released in a revised hardcover edition last month with Tor Books. A sequel in October and a live-action series are forthcoming. Alexene lives and works in Los Angeles with her husband and new baby, where she is generally tolerated by her rescue pit bull.

Read on for Olivie’s favored medeian specialty, lessons learned from writing fanfic, her take on dark academia, and the process of self-publishing books people love.

Not to spoil anything for the three and a half people who maybe haven’t yet read The Atlas Six, but can you tell us a bit about the world of the series?

First of all, I appreciate the wording of this question. Thank you for that. Secondly, The Atlas Six is about the six uniquely talented magicians vying for initiation to the Alexandrian Society, a secret society of caretakers who protect and contribute to the archives of “lost” knowledge from the Library of Alexandria and throughout history. In the book’s contemporary setting, the question of how to combat climate change is answered politically and economically with magic, so the characters exist openly in a world where magicians, called medeians, are university-educated and contribute to a system of capitalism much like ours. These particular six candidates each have a rare magical specialty and a myriad of personal motivations for pursuing the Society’s promise of wealth, power, and knowledge—which drives their tendency to want to kiss or kill any of the others at any given moment. (Two of them already hate each other, and the rest are about to.) And there is obviously a catch to this extraordinary opportunity: only five of the six are guaranteed initiation.

What’s the journey been like writing, self-publishing, and re-releasing The Atlas Six? 

This is absolutely the weirdest timeline. I don’t know of any better way to put it. I wrote this book when I was starting to think that publishing wasn’t going to happen for me. I’ve always split myself in two, writing manuscripts to cold query to agents while also self-publishing the stories I wanted to tell that I didn’t feel were a good fit for the market. Basically, I was self-publishing for the handful of beloved weirdos willing to follow me wherever I went. (Find your flock, they say. Good advice.) 

I knew from my initial concept that this book wasn’t right for publishing en masse—it was too hard to explain in a quick pitch to an agent without sounding derivative. It was too character-driven for genre standards. It had a familiar setting and hook but with a very unconventional execution. There was no hero or villain. Every character was 100% sexually fluid. It was too quiet for spec fic. I was in a really think-y place, trying to figure out whether it was responsible to bring a baby into a world where it’s impossible to be ethical. In the end, I figured I could just write it for myself, exactly as I wanted to write it, while nobody cared enough about me to say no. 

So I wrote it. Released it. People seemed to like it, but it wasn’t doing numbers. Within a few months, I had finished another manuscript and finally gotten an agent for a completely separate project—my young adult rom-com, My Mechanical Romance. I figured, okay, I guess I’m a YA author now, at least until those obligations are fulfilled, so Atlas will have to wait. But, I reasoned, thankfully, only a few people were waiting.

Then I got pregnant. I wrote another YA manuscript. Something weird happened on Twitter. (A very “somehow, Palpatine returned” situation.) People started talking about the book. I gave birth to my son. Something weirder happened on TikTok. A LOT of people started talking about the book. Suddenly my book that had absolutely no commercial appeal was...commercially appealing? I signed with Tor to finish out the trilogy (!). Then…producers wanted to meet with me? So I was like? Okay? In between my baby’s naps, I wrote the sequel and optioned the book for TV. I…got on the NYT bestseller list? I went on tour in two countries? At this point, it all dissolves into a fever dream. Is this real? I really don’t know. I haven’t slept more than two consecutive hours in almost a year. 

On a serious note, revising The Atlas Six was such an incredible opportunity. I went from being a one-woman show (with the help of one or two friends and, of course, my beloved collaborator @littlechmura) to suddenly having the resources to actually make the book into what I wanted it to be. I got to stretch out a little, narratively speaking, and take up more space. New illustrations! New cover! New feedback! New ways to reach a new audience! Suddenly the book of my mind became the book of many minds and was all the better for it. It was then, and is now, a product of some kind of magic. For five years, I wrote ten to twelve hours a day, posting millions and millions of words for free, purely because I loved it—loved it to the point where it broke my heart to think of doing anything else. And now? 

Well, now I have imposter syndrome, of course. But my god, what a beautiful con.

Do you have a favorite character among the six? Why? What does their Tumblr look like?

I don’t have a favorite character—I personally think it’s detrimental for the author to have a favorite when creating an ensemble cast that relies so heavily on changing POVs for the narration—BUT I do feel strongly that Libby and Nico would be the most active on Tumblr. Libby writes poems and carefully curates her aesthetic. I sense a little cottagecore in her. Probably a lot of melancholy art, too. Nico definitely runs an absolute chaosphere of a blog depending on whatever his fixation is at the time. He’s one of those mutuals where you followed him five years ago and can’t remember why because he’s changed fandoms several times, but at least the GIF sets he reblogs are entertaining. 

This reissue includes illustrations from your longtime collaborator, illustrator Little Chmura (@littlechmura). What draws you to this kind of collaboration? 

If you were fortunate enough to become friends with a brilliant artist, wouldn’t you try to lure them in, any chance you got? I love art. I love storytelling as an art and writing as an art. I love the adrenaline rush of creativity I get from working with other artists who are equally passionate about their craft. Sometimes, brainstorming an illustration with Little Chmura makes me feel inspiration in its purest form. The incendiary kind. All of my books contain art from her because it just contributes that much more to the story. Or, at the very least, it helps the story vibe properly. 

You got your start writing Dramione fanfic. What did writing fanfic teach you about writing?

Okay, random start here, but go with me: I really loved this Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again oral history on Vulture where they said that the film was referred to as a crowd-pleaser in a way that was meant to be an insult. A crowd-pleaser, how meaningless. But the producers posed a critically important question: do you know how hard it is to please a crowd? Fanfic authors do. There is no other medium as dependent on audience enjoyment as fanfic. The entire medium is reliant on characterization and emotional beats. Imperfect plot or disrupted pacing can be forgiven if something sweet or hot happens along the way, but failing to be true to a character’s narrative arc or committing to a cheap bit like gratuitous character death is grounds for the proverbial guillotine. 

The number one thing I learned as a fanfic author is always to keep one eye on the audience’s heart. Should it be racing? Fluttering? Aching? Should it, dare I say it, break? Pleasing (or devastating) a crowd is best learned via the fanfic structure: episodic and evolving with constant feedback. Learning how to make someone keysmash in your reviews is a carefully honed skill.

You’re very active online, with copious amounts of asks answered on your Tumblr and a video series on Youtube. Do you have a favorite fan interaction? 

I have been more active in the past—this is a very busy year, what with the chaos goblin I birthed, a slightly unhinged production schedule, and three book releases! I’m feeling very guilty about my untended inbox, but I do love Tumblr. There, I said it! I love Tumblr! I love the multimedia curation! The possibility of long-form communication! The ads that do not, in any way, appear to be stealing my data! Anyway, no, I don’t think I could pick a favorite. There have been too many beautiful interactions, especially from people who’ve been reading my stuff for years. 

Well, I guess one that stands out is a seemingly small series of events: I wrote a short friends-to-lovers fic about two engineers. It sparked a conversation on Tumblr between women who were pushed out of STEM at an early age and women in STEM fields who had never seen themselves in fiction before. It led to my YA book, My Mechanical Romance, especially after one user told me she wished she’d had my writing when she was younger. I thought, okay, well, good point, I should tell a story specifically for our younger selves. And now here we are.

What would your specialty be if you were a medeian, and why?

Telepathy. I’m incredibly nosy. I’d love to have a more nuanced reason, but that’s honestly it.

What’s the best writing advice you’ve received?  

Potentially a bit overused, but the thing that has helped me most is the “you can edit a bad page, but you can’t edit a blank page” quote that Google is currently telling me comes from Jodi Picoult (I obviously first heard it on Tumblr). I have always been a pantser, meaning I fly by the seat of my pants when I write (fanfic is very conducive for such things), and I really had to learn to love revision. It doesn’t matter if you get the first draft right. The first draft is just the skeleton. To everyone who struggles with anxiety or creative blocks, I typically think it helps to tell yourself the first draft is allowed to suck. It’s kind of supposed to suck! Don’t romanticize this idea that writing is when the muse hands you the perfect words in perfect sequence. The craft of writing isn’t about the first draft. It’s about everything you do to bring the story to life. 

What fuels your interest in dark academia? Do you have a favorite dark academia book/film/series/game?

To me, The Atlas Six is true academia—very The Secret History in terms of having long philosophical discussions about the meaning of art and beauty, except I did it with physics and psychology. It’s dark, of course, because of all the gray morality and institutional rot and inadvisable sexual tension. That’s a feature, not a bug, and I love when authors get a little weird with it. I love Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas, Bunny by Mona Awad, Plain Bad Heroines by Emily Danforth. Academia is weird and messed up by most standards, so the outsiders (BIPOC and queer authors) really do some fascinating work handling its darkness. 

The Atlas Paradox comes out in October. Is there anything you can tell us about it?

I personally think it is funnier in the way things are funny when the characters have all begun existentially melting. (I’m an empath, she says chaotically.) People who have read it tell me it’s better than the first book. My publishers tell me hearts will be broken. But I leave all that for others to determine, of course… 

Thanks @olivieblake! The Atlas Six is now available everywhere you can get books!