#proper English doesn’t exist to me when making a post I just type away hoping it’ll make sense

[callo-ow]

Same age hs au where Kakashi will kick your ass if you’re being an unnecessary distraction to his equally smart and competitively, hot-tempered neighbor and classmate they grew up together and if anyone hurts Sakura, Mrs. Mebuki will chase him around the neighborhood with a pan screaming “you had one job!😤” and kakashi will be embarrassed and afraid because Mrs. Mebuki can run surprisingly fast

[blossom-hwa]

3racha cafe au ps? bc the one w the dancers was so funny

KASJDHG I’M GLAD YOU FOUND MY MEDIOCRE ATTEMPTS AT HUMOR FUNNY ANON <3 <3 ANYWAY I LIVE FOR 3RACHA BEING IDIOTS SO THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS IN, I HOPE YOU LAUGH AT IT!!!!

3-year anniversary drabble game: send me an NCT/WAYV/Stray Kids/The Boyz member + a prompt (check out the post for ideas) and  I’ll write a drabble for you!

I’M SO SORRY I HIT POST ON ACCIDENT WHEN I WASN’T DONE SO I HAD TO PRIVATE THIS SO I COULD FINISH IT HHHHHH

~

Title: Cafe Shenanigans

Pairing: no pairings, just 3racha being dumb

Triggers: a lot of cursing, suicidal jokes (purely jokes, if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, please do not read this - it’s along the lines of like ‘pls kill me now’ but yeah)

~

quick clarification:

better than tony: chan

chingban: changbin

gremlin: jisung 

~

better than tony: changbin what have I told you about swearing in front of customers

chingban: not to do it

better than tony: then why did I hear you say shit when you knocked your head against the counter

gremlin: HOW DID CHANGBIN KNOCK HIS HEAD AGAINST THE OUCNTER EVEN HE’S NOT /THAT/ SHORT

chingban: I don’t exist for anything but pain

chingban: when will I stop being clowned for no reason

chingban: also I stooped down to get more syrup okay I wasn’t standing when I fucking hit my head

better than tony: you will stop being clowned when you learn the meaning of professionalism

gremlin: didn’t you lock yourself in the bathroom one time to send cat memes to minho

better than tony: THAT’S BESIDE THE POINT

chingban: pls let it go chan the guy just laughed okay

chingban: no harm done

chingban: well my dignity is in pieces

gremlin: can’t break something that never existed

chingban: watch me pour hot coffee down your throat while you scream in pain tiny sucker

gremlin: who’s calling me tiny

better than tony: kids please

chingban: ONE FUCKING CENTIMETER

better than tony: I'm the manager and they still won’t listen to me

better than tony: I'm giving up on life

gremlin: we’re right here you know

better than tony: did I say something wrong?

chingban: ooooo breaking out the punctuation

chingban: he’s serious today

better than tony: I'm always serious

gremlin: your cat memes say otherwise

better than tony: WILL YOU LET THAT GO

~

gremlin: if another bitch asks for a complicated-ass order, fucking soy latte with no foam or whatever the fuck

gremlin: I'm going to slit my throat in front of the cameras

gremlin: and my ghost will haunt this fucking cafe for the rest of time

chingban: aren’t there better things to do after you’re dead

chingban: like

better than tony: rejoice in the fact that you are no longer alive?

chingban: ^^

gremlin: no I just want to make sure I'm a pain in your asses even beyond the grave

chingban: a little bitch even in death, I see

gremlin: you got me !

better than tony: why do you have an extra space between your last word and the exclamation mark

gremlin: extra chaos

better than tony: as if your existence wasn’t chaotic enough already

chingban: just a suggestion

chingban: if you want to haunt us beyond the grave

chingban: team up with that little dude ji changmin across the mall at build a bear

gremlin: omg yes thank you for this lovely piece of advice

better than tony: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

better than tony: N O

better than tony: CHANGBIN WHY WOULD YOU GIVE HIM IDEAS

chingban: I need entertainment

chingban: and you getting scared shitless is entertainment

chingban: additionally if I'm the one providing the advice by the transitive property I'm not the one who gets pranked

gremlin: <3

better than tony: I should honestly fire both of you

better than tony: all you do is text at work

better than tony: swear in front of customers

better than tony: and leAVE HAIRPINS IN THE FUCKING SINK

gremlin: I APOLOGIZED FOR THAT

chingban: felix says minho threatens to fire him and hyunjin at least once every shift

better than tony: I should do the same

gremlin: nah you’re too soft for that

chingban: ^^

better than tony: I want to argue but I can’t and I hate it

gremlin: <3

chingban: <3

better than tony: maybe I'll be the one who slits his throat in front of the cameras

gremlin: no you won’t you’re too soft to haunt us beyond the grave

better than tony: you’re right I won’t haunt you

better than tony: I'll just enjoy being dead and not fucking alive and having to deal with you

chingban: ngl that sounds like a pretty sweet deal

gremlin: but haunting

chingban: no

gremlin: :(

better than tony: changbin look you’ve made him sad

chingban: I-

chingban: YOU STARTED IT

better than tony: <3

chingban: breaking news chan has the capacity for evil and I don’t like it

~

gremlin: in my defense I was left alone

better than tony: that doesn’t explAIN THE FUCKING FIRE IN THE R E F R I G E R A TO R

better than tony: HOW DO YOU EVEN SET FIRE TO A FUCKING REFRIGERATOR

chingban: I honestly wonder why chan hasn’t fired us yet

chingban: mostly jisung but also me

better than tony: A R E F R I G E R A T O R

gremlin: chan

gremlin: listen

gremlin: was this worse than ‘wow’

better than tony: .... 

chingban: nothing could be worse than wow

chingban: his gc name is proof

better than tony: FUCK

gremlin: okay cool thank you for agreeing 

gremlin: now

gremlin is typing...

chingban: the fuck are you typing 

chingban: a whole ass essay??

gremlin: if setting a fire in a refrigerator is still a less horrible mess than wow was, that means that chan can no longer yell at me for setting a fire in a refrigerator because he was one of the main contributors to the mess that wow was, meaning because he contributed to a bigger mess than the refrigerator fire, he is unable to yell at me because to do so would be hypocrisy because he committed a worse crime than I did

chingban: did that... did that really just fucking make sense

chingban: quick chan use your lawyering skills to find some loophole in this there’s no way jisung can be making sense

gremlin: okay fuck you

better than tony: your argument is invalid because you also contributed to wow

chingban: ROASTED

gremlin: fuck I really thought I had chan beat there for a moment

chingban: fat chance 

better than tony: OKAY AS PUNISHMENT

better than tony: NO MORE TEXTING GET BACK TO WORK

gremlin: yes papi

better than tony: oh my god I hate it here

~

gremlin: question

gremlin: if cookie monster entered the cafe and pointed a gun at me and told me to give him all of the cookies in the display case and the oven

gremlin: what should I do

better than tony: I 

better than tony: I don’t even know how to respond to this

chingban: give him the cookies wtf

chingban: where’s your sense of self-preservation

gremlin: flew away the first time I jumped out of a two-story window to avoid becoming ‘it’ in a game of tag in third grade

better than tony: that

better than tony: that explains so much

chingban: I feel like I should be surprised but I'm really not

chingban: that’s the most jisung thing I've ever heard of

gremlin: <3

gremlin: but back to my question

gremlin: what should I do

chingban: I literally said to give him the fucking cookies

better than tony: I agree with changbin

gremlin: but what if he gets greedy and asks for the cheesecake too

gremlin: and it’s my day to take home the leftover cake

better than tony: would you die for cheesecake???????????

gremlin: without a moment’s hesitation

chingban: the amount of brain cells I lost throughout this conversation

chingban: unfathomable

better than tony: I'm quitting my job

gremlin: no pls don’t who else will changbin and I bother during breaks

chingban: you say that kind of bullshit about cookie monster and cheesecake and then you go and say ‘changbin and I’ instead of ‘me and changbin’ like normal people?????????

gremlin: look you may have had a crusty ass English teacher but my English teacher was LIT and I'll have you know I would take a bullet for her

gremlin: the least I can do use proper grammar when it comes to common mistakes

gremlin: mistakes that plebs like you make

better than tony: this conversation has gone off the rails

chingban: a train wreck

gremlin: more like 15 train wrecks mashed into one

better than tony: just. pls get back to work

gremlin: not unless you promise not to fire yourself

better than tony: it’s?? not?? possible?? for?? me?? to?? fire?? myself??

chingban: he means quit

better than tony: oh

chingban: I speak fluent jisung

better than tony: pls shut up 

better than tony: fine I promise

better than tony: please get back to work

better than tony: preferably without burning any refrigerators

gremlin: no promises

better than tony: I'll take what I can get

[criquette-was-here]

Long Awaited Replies

Hello everyone! It’s been awhile since my last activity here. Stuff’s just got real last few months and I am now experiencing some heavy RLS which makes the future of the whole Feverfew project quite uncertain. I’m very annoyed by the fact I have to move the release date over and over again, but, fingers crossed, I’ll be able to manage to make it this year. But before I post any updates, I need to answer my inbox!

@landgraabsims​ said:

feverfew is absolutely gorgeous!! is it inspired by any real-life places or towns? i live in england and it reminds me of a few in-the-middle-of-nowhere villages i've visited c:

Thanks @landgraabsims​! Yes, Feverfew is based on British countryside aesthetics without any towns or villages in particular. It has a bit of everything, really. It’s a fantasy place after all. But I do use a lot of real life references for making landmarks for it.

Anonymous said:

any idea of the date of release for feverwood? just redownloaded sims 2 and im in loveee

Hey Anon! I’m glad you like it! I really hope to make it happen this year.

Anonymous said:

i would die (or pay) for zagoskin omg it looks like TS3

Oh, thank you, Anon!

@katzengirl​ said:

Hello Criquette! I don't have a challenge or a question or a request. I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate the things you've shared with us! I hope you're having a good day.

Hello Kristina! That is so sweet, thank you ^___^ I hope you’re doing fine too!

Anonymous said:

Hi there, Criquette. Been having fun with your Rural Charm set and the Better Lighting.  Ran into one small problem with the RC. One of the narrow curves picks up the texture from a road section with a crosswalk, so that looks a bit odd (30degree inner?).  And a question - is there a Better Lighting for the Iron Bracket street lamp with the seasons banner?  Thought the iron bracket would work, but it's not. Anywho, Thank You for ALL the work you put into making our hoods look fantastic!

Hey Anon! Thanks! Depending on the road DR you’re using, there can be some  texture issues here and there since Rural Charm is optimised for road texture without any markings (apart from the broken white line). As for the Iron light post with a banner – no. I’ve only made 2 Maxis’ base game lamp posts.

Anonymous said:

It's amazing how this one game embraces so many different types of players. I'm planning to create my very own nh from scratch, and I'd be a liar not to recognize how your game pics inspired me to the task (not to mention your ever impressive work of hood deco cc throughout these years). For all that, as much as I'm just another anon, thank you, sincerely. But that left me wondering: do you also/still play with the other ts2 game modes or they no longer interest you?

Oh, that is so kind, Anon. Thank you! Yes, I do love to actually play the game. I enjoy building/decorating lots as much as live mode. In fact, I often get carried away during playtest sessions and just keep playing in lot mode and that’s why there are lots like ‘The Tower Inn’ or ‘The Moose & Beaver’ or sims like Tilda Phidbach, WHT-FC28 servo and their field lab.

Anonymous said:

Criquette, do you know something about this project? thesims1master tumblr (the idea is to make the game look like the beta version. I ask, because I liked it so much, but I haven't been able to find the person behind it and I'm very curious to see more or download it, as well as his world, which I've been waiting for since last year lol)

Hey Anon! Oh, I don’t think I know anything about this project, no. But it looks rather interesting!

@forever-evenfall​ said:

Hey Criquette! I just downloaded your Lighting Remedy (because I only just realised I needed to change the txt file and not just download it lol) and when I placed your lighting text in the program files, the lighting itself worked, but the terrain itself was flashing red. Do you know what I did wrong? I literally don’t think I can play without the fix lol. I am using UC and I placed it in the Fun With Pets/SP9/TSData/Res/Lights folder. Should I have put it somewhere else?

Hello Eve! I might be wrong, but isn’t it Mansions & Gardens SP that stands for UC? Anyway, flashing red terrain is really weird consequence for just replacing a txt file. Neighborhood terrain doesn’t have any dynamic light. It has a light map instead which comes with Lighting remedy too. If you only just replace the lighting txt file without putting LR light map into your ‘Downloads’ folder, the only issue you should get would by unsynchronized light directions for hood decos and the terrain itself.

Anonymous said:

I'm having a problem: not all the decorations I put in the neighborhood are showing up in simulation mode, even with the fade off and the long-range vision on. I think there is some code that I need to add to the game files to make all the decorations appear. But I can't find how to do this: c Can you help me?

Hello Anon! Basically, there’s only one type of hood deco that isn’t showing up in lot mode and that is neighborhood effects. All the decals, flowers, fields, all the animated stuff (except for texture animation, e.g. Maxis’ marquee sign) is not showing up in lot mode. There’s nothing we can do about it. Yet. If you think that there’s a proper hood deco that isn’t showing up in lot mode, please PM me with some screenshots and we could try to sort it out.

Anonymous said:

Hello--Anon who asked about additional pieces for the Rural Charm set--I see now, thank you for explaining about the floating intersections.  Is there anything you recommend then, to add on to existing roads? Otherwise, thanks for taking the time to explain.

Hello Anon! Oh, you’re most welcome. There is a tedious way to replace a texture on the existing tile of the real road, to make in into intersection so that it would connect better visually with decorative road pieces. But that takes time. What you have to do is to determine the tile you want to edit using technique described in this tutorial and then you have to change the texture name in the corresponding line. The texture names for the intersections (their index name parts) can be found in any road DR beforehand.

@sunradersimblr​ said:

Hi, I'm just wondering if you've ever done hood deco of a highway rest stop like the type we see in the U.S. along interstates and state highways, just a green space, usually, with toilet facilities and a place for a picnic and parking lot? I need one for a story and thought I'd check with you. Thanks for all the great work you share! 

Hello Sunrader! That would be really nice addition for the highway set, but I haven’t made it. Thought it’s quite possible to make something similar if you use ‘One side exit piece’ from the motorway set and add some picnic tables, umbrellas and benches using street tables & benches set. There’s also many 4t2 deco conversions for toilets and other small size decos that would help to create a decent resting stop.

@nataliepop​ said:

Hi there Criquette! There's a new game called Townscaper which I think you'd like. The architecture has an English aesthetic and you build cities or towns but it all starts on an ocean. It's in early access, so I hope by the time it officially releases they add boats and piers. Look it up on Steam or Youtube. I saw it via someone who usually does Cities Skylines videos. Btw, have you ever played that? Also, apart from sims what else do you enjoy playing? Anyway, hope you are having a good day!

Hey Natpop! Thanks for a lovely game suggestion! I’ve checked it out and it looks really fun. Can’t say I’d play it though XD All my free time (which I don’t have atm) is reserved for simming hood deco making working on Feverfew ^^

Anonymous said:

hey~ i love all of your stuff, you're so talented (๑♡⌓♡๑) i wanted to ask, do you think you'll ever release feverfew's sc4 map? 

Thank you Anon! That’s very kind. I’m not sure if there’s any point in releasing SC4 map I used for Feverfew because it’s completely differs from the way it looks now. The road layout is different, there’s no canal, no islands on the river, hills are different, etc. It has been heavily terraformed and edited during development process. I’d recommend just to wait till the Feverfew neigborhood release.

Anonymous said:

Hi! Do you have any idea of when Feverfew will be released? :) 

Hey Anon! It will be released this year, hopefully!

Anonymous said:

Hello :D Is it possible to get your linden trees as lot objects in build/garden section? I love them and they beautify my neighborhood but could really use an option to select them on lots too :)

Hello Anon! Yes, that’s possible, though I can’t say if I could make it myself. What I can say though, is that there’s a linden trees redux coming soon. It would make linden trees look better and highly optimised so that it would only take 4,5 Mb instead of 60 Mb without any losses in texture quality and resolution. 

[hellsparadiseessays]

Aza Brothers Week - Day 2

To keep celebrating the existence of our beloved bandit brothers, I thought it’d be funny to check some stuff I had written about them back in April/May with the current hindsight we have! It’s an essay in three parts, initially posted on r/Jigokuraku. This essay may also be very useful to those of you who’re waiting for my Criminality essay, btw. More under the cut!

Aza bros, an analysis – Part I : an essay on the traditional family model in Japanese culture, and how society’s expectations impact the siblings

As a disclaimer, three things need to be mentioned. First, thy enter spoiler territory; flee while thy can, new reader! Second, I am not Japanese nor raised in Japan, so my take is solely based on the academic documents I read, what I know and what I understand. If there’s a mistake in my understanding, please, feel free to address it. Third, English is not my native language, so while I’m fluent in it, I don’t promise a 100% quality and may make some grammar mistakes here and there. On this note, let’s start a needlessly academic write up. I hope you’ll deem it an enjoyable or educative read.

Writers tend to find inspiration in reality, and manga authors aren’t dispensed from that. It is visible in Jigokuraku, notably with the Aza siblings, Toma and Chôbe. These two characters, through their backstory, find themselves both in and out of society, influenced by it, yet rejecting it. In this first part of the full analysis of our good brothers, we’ll study the family model that was historically prevalent during the Edo period, the roles of the elder and younger brothers in the family, and what we can infer on the siblings’ respective personality based on those informations.

1. Definition of the Ie family model

Based on the historical references given by the characters, it is possible not only to pinpoint the period during which the story takes place (Edo period), but it is also possible to estimate a general time period based on the references to 47 rônin and the Kaitai Shinshou. Based on these informations, we can roughly establish the time of the story as between late 1710 and early 1730.

This time period generally tends to provide us with prime examples of the Ie family model, which is the family model that follows the Uji model (household/clan) that developed during the Heian period. The Ie model is initially found in the samurai cast, but later spread to the lower cast of Japanese society (merchants, craftsmen and farmers) to organise it according to both a symbolic and corporate perspective through the roles of its members (“Ie and Dôzoku - Family and descent in Japan” by Shimizu Akitoshi, 1987). The Ie model is based on a patriarchal system in which the head of the family has power not only over his wife and children, but over his younger siblings as well. It means, for example, that a younger sister couldn’t marry without her older brother’s consent, and a younger brother couldn’t quit the household without his older brother’s consent either – else it’d be perceived as desertion, which isn’t the best of things in the samurai cast.

A specificity of this family model is the use of titles rather than names (with the appropriate suffix attached to it). These titles serve to put an emphasis on the role of the family member over his or her persona. In “Socialisation for Achievement: Essays on the cultural psychology of the Japanese” (pages 44-45), George A. De Vos explains that titles such as Ototo (“little brother”, how Chôbe calls Toma) are such titles and put it as follows: “there is a sense of security attached to the role in that the individual knows he can maintain himself within the protective armor of his role position”.

The Ie model is seen with the Aza siblings, described in chapter 9 as being the sons of a samurai operating as a vassal to the Lord of Akô. We’ll see how it applies to them in-story, based on what we know of their past and mostly chapter 9, as it is the chapter in which both brothers are introduced along their past.

2. Chôbe and social expectations: a bitter tale

The first thing we learn about Chôbe is how strong he is. Not just physically, but mentally as well. External points of view paints him as a dangerously capable man, able to become the head of a group of bandits despite his youth, able to send a man flying up to six meters with a kick... And his adaptability, as his little brother mentions more than once throughout the manga – because Chôbe isn’t the one doing the talking in their story. “Every single time, he instantly digested goings-on, adapted to them, and in the end came out on top, to conquer it all”, says Toma in chapter 9. And it’s true, the narration showed us how resourceful Chôbe is – borderline crazy at times, even (as per chapter 30, it’s a human arm Chôbe, please stahp).

Then we get Chôbe’s direct point of view in chapters 9 and 49, and it tells us so much more about him, in more than one way. The thing that struck me most is the way we get his own flashbacks. It’s not explained, it’s showed with a handful of panels.What can we take from that? Well, the obvious would be how action-oriented he is, a show, don’t tell type of person. The less obvious would be the lack of actual words relating to his past. Both times, the flashbacks immediately lead to an extremely negative reaction, Chôbe is furious and let us know by going on a rampage. Even worse, it’s words that trigger his fury, words such as “murder is a sin” that sound way too much like “the crimes of a lord are the crimes of his vassals, his sins their sins” (chapter 9). Even worse, as of chapter 49, we see that the simple thought of samurai is enough to have him completely lose his mind out of sheer anger (“It’s making me mad. Eyesore. In my way. Kill.”), to the point he accidentally hurt his own beloved brother. These flashbacks allow us an interesting reading of Chôbe: he is strong, but still clearly damaged by what happened to him, to the point it becomes one of his Berserk Buttons and the one on the receiving hand doesn’t get out of it unscathered. To the point he still doesn’t put many words on it. To the point he rejects society’s rules and gleefully becomes what society claimed he was during his childhood, because this very society let him and his family down, indirectly led to his parents’ death, got him and his little brother in a terrible situation despite their innocence. This failing is also the reason why he despises his father so much: dad fought for revenge, sure, but still followed the rules in place and failed to stay alive afterwards. With everything we know, of course Chôbe will see him as a fool with no ambition, as opposed to himself, his survival instinct and adaptability. Why would he even act like the proper son of a samurai, when it only leads to a lot of trouble?

Funnily enough, there’s still a bit of society’s rules left in his behaviour, and it’s visible in the way the dynamic with his brother is shown.

3. Toma: the younger brother must follow

We had quick shots of Toma early in the story, but he’s been truly introduced in chapter 9, in a truly interesting manner. The very first thing we see is his skill with the blade and the praises he receives, a prodigy who rose in the ranks of the apprentices in only a month, a feat never seen before. Yet, his first thought sounds like a philosophy of life: “The meaning of strength... Is change”. As soon as he shares this thought with the reader, we’re lead to the actual goal: getting his brother out of jail by infiltrating the Asaemon. Immediately, Toma proceeds to share more of his thought on change: “and what is ‘change’? Change is shifting one’s outward form as the situation demands”. Well, it does seem to be precisely what he did with his successful infiltration and is shown having a nice little chat with Chôbe as he keeps explaining his definition of change, because Toma is quite the chatty one. “It’s the speedy comprehension, and acceptance, of the situation at hand. Even if there may be times that are awfully difficult to understand...” At this point, we’re switching from the flashback in prison to the current situation our brothers are in, which involves a group of Soshin as the welcoming committee on the island. At this point, Toma stutters and seems at loss, while Chôbe is asking a practical question regarding the creatures they are facing, before immediately taking action. And here, Toma’s monologue suddenly focuses on Chôbe: “he always instantly takes it in, that is what makes my brother strong”. But is it really a sudden focus? Wasn’t it all about Chôbe from the start, even though it felt like Toma sharing his personal view on life rather than the way he perceives his brother? These pages, which are only the start of chapter 9, already tell us a lot about Toma: his brother comes first, and Toma himself takes a step back even when he accomplishes spectacular feats all by himself: he does it all for the sake of his brother, his own will doesn’t matter as much.

And this admiration and respect he has for his brother is further justified with yet another flashback, during which Toma keeps telling us how skilled Chôbe is at adapting and dealing with all the misfortunes they had to face since childhood. Condemned for the mistakes of their lord? Toma is shaken and seems too young to fully understand the situation, Chôbe doesn’t show any specific emotion. Their mother passes away due to illness? Toma cries, like any kid losing their mother would, but Chôbe remains fairly composed. Same story with the execution of their father, the brothers being reduced to begging on the side of the road and getting caught by a group of bandits. Again, Toma keeps expressing his admiration towards his brother and his adaptability, how it keeps helping him come out on top. And everytime, Toma puts himself as the one who follows big brother, because big brother is the best and always knows what to do. Because if he can’t follow with the change, he becomes unnecessary to his brother. After all, Chôbe himself told him so, back when they were living with the bandits: “Quit yer cryin’, Toma! If you show weakness like that, you’re only begging to die! If you don’t know what’s right or wrong, then just believe in me! I’m your big bro, and a big bro is his little brother’s guidepost, I’m always right! Always and everytime!”

Funnily enough, as soon as Toma reminisces those words, we’re back to present again with Chôbe stating his new awesome revised plan: taking the elixir of life for themselves. He grins as he utters thee words, and right at the next panel, Toma shows us the exact same grin as he agrees yet expresses his thought concerning the difficulties they may encounter as they keep going, and how it may get worse the longer they stay on the island.

4. Orderly outsiders

Based on what has already been said about the Ie family model typical of the Edo period and especially prevalent in samurai families, as well as what has been inferred about the Aza brothers based on the informations given to us by chapters 9 and 49, we can draw some conclusion about the way they perceive themselves, their past, each other, and how their rejection of the social order that abandoned them despite their innocence doesn’t stop them from following certain social codes – the very codes that make them a real family according to the rules of society.

First thing first, their self-awareness. It seems Chôbe is better at it than Toma, as he knows what he can do and what he can improve, while Toma consistently put himself in the background, even when he could legitimately pat himself on the back a bit. Second, Toma seems to be better at putting words on their past than Chôbe. Way better at it, even, since he pushes the reflection as far as justifying his brother’s strength by the way he handled everything until now. Chôbe, on the other hand, barely puts any words on the few memories we see – memories we probably wouldn’t be able to comprehend without Toma’s point of view and explanations -, and the little words he expresses about it immediately lead to rage and brutality, the physical expression of a pain that runs deep and seems to never be properly addressed. This is where things become interesting: by becoming the big brother and the unofficial head of the family through unfortunate circumstances, Chôbe clearly seems to have repressed his own feelings in order to take the lead and move forward. Toma perceives himself as the little brother who must follow, as is the role of the proper little brother in the Ie family model. This perception goes as far as Toma describing himself as merely an extension of his brother, and not his own person. And it’s sad, really sad, because we’ve seen what Toma is capable of on his own, we’ve seen how much trust Chôbe himself puts in him. Which is why I think both of them being separated as of chapter 50 can lead to a lot of good for Toma, who’ll have to rely solely on himself and so will have to change his perception of himself. Considering his abilities, I personally believe it can only lead to a positive outcome for him [ETA: bless be chapter 54 IT’S HAPPENING I’m so proud of you Toma]. As for Chôbe, the situation may be more difficult for him – and no, I’m not just talking about his encounter with Rien. Accidentally injuring his brother is the one thing that made him get a hold of himself again in chapter 49 and 50, and generally speaking, he does what he does for the sake of protecting his little brother – he even sacrificed his right eye as a kid for his sake. In my opinion, Toma acts like the hoops that keep Chôbe together. Remove the hoops, and things may go horribly wrong. However, I do trust his survival instinct to be strong enough for him to figure a way out. I just hope he won’t lose it again, because this time it may be difficult for him to get control of the situation again.

And with that, I conclude the first part, which is longer than expected! However, I wanted to explain various things that’ll be mentioned in the next part, so we’re all clear. The next part should also be shorter, since it’ll be less focused on canon information and more of an opinion-based (and less academic) piece according to what we know for now. Again, I hope you found this write up enjoyable or informative. I certainly did enjoy working on it, and it led to my newfound appreciation of Toma. Please, love this guy, he deserves it.

Sources

Ie and Dôzoku - Family and Descent in Japan

Socialization for Achievement: Essays on the Cultural Psychology of the Japanese

[goolagola]

THE CASE FOR (dis)FUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIPS (YAGIZ & HAZAN: A Love Story, Part 1) | #review

Originally posted on Fb, March 30, 2018.

So Sinan called Hazan out for being DISTANT in E35… Pfft. Aight. If ya really wanna do this, let’s stab at it. Here’s a whole entire #review on DISTANCE and its conquering nemesis—INTIMACY. Keep in mind, I’m not caught up like most of ya, still on half of E38.

PART I — And That Is The Question 

How would you define a relationship?

Ah. What a doozy—RELATIONSHIPS.

If we’re honest, just about everybody on this planet craves it—whether familial, platonic, or romantic, even ones of professional nature.

For if we’re truly honest, we are afraid of being alone. 

As sick as it is, even a psychopath who suffers total deficit of empathy towards anything with life, would have no channel to release his twisted and murderous intent if he’s utterly alone, being the only creature in the entire planet with not even an amoeba floating around anywhere to be his hapless victim. A frightening thing, isn’t it—to be completely ALONE? He’d soon self-destruct. Researchers have discovered that even babies would stop growing and eventually die, though fed with the proper nutrition to flourish, because of—check this—never being touched and held. 

There’s something in human beings that craves company. We need it, literally, if we’d ever hope to survive.

Well, here’s what Oxford English Dictionary describes what RELATIONSHIP is: 

“The way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected.”

It’s pretty clear. It boils down to one thing…

CONNECTION.

Or LACK thereof.

Aaaaand ladies and gentlemen—that concludes this review. 

Kidding.

But for real though. That pretty much sums it up. If you want to make a case of how valuable a relationship is between any two people, you assess it by the strength of the CONNECTION they share with each other.

Now. Let’s humor all the existing ships in this series; but particularly, of the duel between Yag+Haz or Sin+Haz—or whatever they’re called—If you really want to test which of the relationship is actually more of a TRUE relationship... Well, test it by the connection the pairings of characters actually have with each other. Be it between Gokhan and Sevda—or even Fazilet and Riza 😆

Connection. It’s as simple as that. 

But before we go any further, what actually is a CONNECTION?

English Dictionaries on the World Wide Web pretty much say that generally, a connection is “the act of linking one thing to another”. Absolutely. But as far as relationships are concerned, that’s not really accurate, is it? Only because it isn't enough in its definition to just encapsulate connection in relationships as “linking” TO or WITH something or someone else. Shucks, your iPhone and Bose speakers can link up together via wireless and invisible Bluetooth technology, but it doesn’t mean that they have a relationship with each other. BAHAHA 😂. And so, just because somebody is linked to somebody else, it does not mean that they’re “connected”, sharing a CONNECTION with each other, at least the type of connection that truly makes up a RELATIONSHIP, one that actually LASTS. Any two people can be linked together because they’re from the same graduating year, of the very same high school, in the very same town they grew up in. But it doesn’t guarantee at all that they have a relationship. For all we know, they never knew each other.

In the case of relationships, CONNECTION is profoundly more than what Meriam-Webster generally says it is—“The act of linking one thing to another”… Yes; In relationships, there IS “linking"going on—

But it doesn’t mean mutual SYNCING is happening. 

Allow me to explain. 

Ya see, the iMac that I personally use at the office is connected straight to the Internet via Ethernet to ensure optimal speed for the particular set of things that my work requires. The modem is certainly INSTALLED and working as it should, just as my beast of a computer is. And the Cat6 cable connecting the iMac to the Modem is working just as reliably well. So, not only is the modem and the computer FUNCTIONING properly, so is the Cat6. But here’s one VERY CRUCIAL thing out of all this set-up… If the iMac is ON but the Modem is OFF, there will be NO Network connection ESTABLISHED. Which means, NO Internet, and since 80% of our system is a series of WEB-based data-syncing Applications, there will be little to absolutely NO work done. And the opposite is true as well, Modem ON but iMac OFF, I’d have the same scenario on my hands, if not WORSE, because the iMac is completely non-operational. Don’t forget—the Cat6 is installed and LINKING the iMac and Modem TOGETHER. BUT… 

There is NO SYNCING established for there is no EXCHANGE of SIGNALS between the two hardwares—therefore, NO CONNECTION, whatsoever.

In other words, to ensure and establish any type of connection is for the two "to be connected”—

Which is “to be JOINED”, and finally, interacting with each other.

Now we’re striking something.

And so, in RELATIONSHIPS, the Hundred Dollar times a Hundred Dollar question is (see what I did there 😏)—

What causes CONNECTION to transpire in the FIRST place? 

And THAT, ladies and gents, is THE golden question of the day.

Some would say that it’s the neurological receptors in the brain reacting or non-reacting to any one individual, some would say it’s the mystical act of the cosmos. Without getting weird or just overly complicated, whatever your stand is, the simple fact of the matter is that in relationships, when and where there is an EXCHANGE of THE HEART and SOUL between any two individuals, there occurs a CONNECTION between them. 

Now... remember what I said what INTIMACY was?

Beyond ANY physical interaction, INTIMACY is the EXCHANGE of THE HEART. It is the interaction of one soul to another that causes a CONNECTION between them, which over time, results in a BOND between those two individuals.

Whether that connection CONTINUES to flow, will determine just how STRONG their bond will be.

You must see where I’m going now. Hint—think back on the past reviews 😉 (and for once, I’m not telling ya “that’s for later”  😁—c’mon, gimme some  👊). Sooooo. If you’re a HazSin fan (I don’t know why, but I keep wanting to say Gesundheit every darn time I see “HazSin"! And NO, I don’t mean Hazim and Sinan 😑—pls, don’t make me spell it out), or just plain Anti-YagHaz… PLEASE come up with something other than just “Yagiz sucks and YagHaz is just gross—DUH” as your ammo for why Yagiz and Hazan just would not work. Now, I know many can give a comprehensive reasoning why they wouldn’t work and you are certainly, and respectfully, entitled to that opinion. And to be fair, I’m sure there ARE YagHaz supporters out there that’ve jumped on the bandwagon and ship YagHaz simply because “Sinan just sucks and he’s just GROSS—so is his relationship with Hazan”, without really expounding why and provide a respectful AND warranted answer for it. And I’m sorry if your encounters with those fanboys and girls have been less than savory. I myself occasionally dabble in the making of GIFs where sinsin—err, Sinan—has been the subject of some friendly but juvenile mild teasing (I mean, it concerns his HAIR, so even you must understand WHY—but if the subject of his hair and how it virtually smells truly offends you, do forgive me, for I still have a few more GIFs in store 😬). But in the spirit of good sportsmanship, my homies and I won't be screechin Queen's legendary “WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ARE THE CHAMPIONS, MY FRIENDS!” before the finish line—Scout’s Honor 🤘⚔️😁.  Aaand whichever ship you’re currently now aboard, I certainly am not here to say you’re right or I’m right or play tit for tat—or even say, “Grab the lifeline, honey, cuz yo ship is definitely sinkin,” even if that would save yo tails, if ya don’t want me to. 

I’m simply here to bring a perspective. And I’m still writing because you’re still asking for that perspective (cool yo jets there, HazSinners, I’m speaking to YagHaz Nation now—they’re the ones asking for it). Despite how loooonng of a post my reviews get. So, KUDOS to y’all for riding the Goola’s-Not-So-Express-And-Not-To-Hogwarts-But-Still-Somewhat-Magical Train to the end—Each. Friggin. Time. (Ok, ok, it’s only magical because we’re exploring Sirma’s world full of Unicorns, Lollipops, and Rainbows—no need to wonder any longer, the sanity of FHVK 👀). I DO hope that perspective has enriched your experience in watching this perfectly sensible show.  

Now… Here’s the thing about PERSPECTIVE—it can be RELATIVE. And when things are relative, it can cause a headache. Take “beauty" for example—someone can say that Sinan is beautiful, and another, the complete opposite, and World War 3 might just ensue after. In this case, to say that “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” as the definition for beauty makes it relative, because it can be true for some, that Sinan is beautiful, but it won’t for others. BUT, there are just some things that just CANNOT be relative…

TRUTH itself.

You can’t add or take away from Truth. If Truth is relative, then it wouldn’t be called TRUTH. It’ll be called RELATIVISM. But ok… 

WHY am I saying all this? Weren’t we just talking about Relationships? What am I really getting at?

Well, in a series that showcases relationships that are wrought with hidden secrets and lies, wouldn’t you reckon that TRUTH just could possibly be those relationships' SAVING GRACE? 

If you’re up for another train of a post, by all means stay on and let’s find out! All aboard, next stop—

PART II — To Be or Not To Be… 

The last time a PART of a Review was titled what you just read above, that Part was pretty much delving into just who IS Yagiz Egemen. In other words, it was expounding the IDENTITY of Yagiz’ character. 

This time, we’re going to explore what truly IS going on between Yagiz and Hazan… and Sinan—thus far. 

We’re going to call it for what it is. If it’s yellow, let’s call it yellow, not mustard. If it’s purple, let’s call it purple, not magenta. And if it’s lies, let’s call it lies, not truth. And if it’s love, let’s call it love. Just love.

In E35, when Sinan called Hazan out for being distant, boy, was I glad. Ok, before y’all rain down those poopy emojis on me, hear me out for a sec. Yes, I was glad for one thing—but I also wanted to whiplash somebody to Earth-2 Gorilla City till kingdom come. 

For one thing, Sinan's words caused Hazan to be aware that somehow, her being distant with him is connected with the convoluted feelings that overwhelmed her after witnessing another woman with Yagiz, punctuated by the words that Kerime spitefully said to her—that she could not take her eyes off of her boyfriend’s brother. Because that’s literally the flashbacks we saw Hazan being overwhelmed by after Sinan’s confrontation with her. 

And it caused her to run away, literally. Poor Yagiz—dude looked like a dancing Elmo with his hands stretched out, calling after her 🤣, I couldn't stop laughing. But this isn’t Sesame’s Street with happy sing-a-longs and dancing muppets. This is DRAMA on steroids.

So, was I glad that finally, something sensible was making its rare appearance once again. The TRUTH was raising its scepter—funny that it came from Sinan’s lips, though he himself had no idea just how crucial that confrontation was. 

Distant is what his and Hazan's relationship has become. And a distant relationship is truly the epitome of oxymoron—IRONIC. 

Halfway into the confrontation, notice that Hazan was able to see at which point Sinan started becoming “distant”. But Sinan had no clue when it was for Hazan. And aye, therein lies the rub—

He just DOES NOT KNOW. 

Period.

From the very beginning, he doesn’t truly know who Hazan really was. Just like he doesn’t truly know who his brother really was. Sinan has always been a self-centered, unaccountable, answers-to-no-one-but-himself, immature man. Check this, he doesn’t even know himself—He is not a character who has a strong sense of IDENTITY and PURPOSE like his older brother Yagiz. Even Gokhan had clearer goals than him—though divisive those goals were at the time. Heck, even that viper Yasemin had stronger convictions than Sinan did about having purpose in life, though those convictions are fostered by evil designs. Because if Sinan had truly developed strong convictions of values that a man should have—like integrity and character—he would not have sent Yagiz to that hotel room, making a devastating mockery of a young woman’s dignity. And he certainly would have taken ownership and responsibility for that distance between him and Hazan.

How did it come to BE in the first place?—

That DISTANCE.

PART III — The Perfect Present 

Valentine’s Day is quite a celebrated day all over the globe, whether you’re a believer or not. It’s a day where gifts are exchanged between lovers. You know the D.L—hugs, kisses, and chocolates are usually exchanged. With the signature bouquet of red roses—throw in there some teddy bears too. But what is the best present that a lover could ever hope to receive? Chocolate?

Last review I said that the only thing necessary for distance to develop is for the exchange of the heart to cease. 

Just like it requires an exchange of signals between my iMac and the Modem to establish a Network connection, it requires the SYNCING of hearts for a lovers’ relationship to THRIVE. And with Sinan and Hazan, at some point, somebody CUT OFF the signal.

And THAT was Hazan.

But before ya get your underthings in a bunch, hear me out again. The reason Hazan cut off the signal in the first place was because Sinan was sending a CORRUPTED one to her; he had betrayed her by his lies and had been the perpetrator of that shameful event in the hotel room, not Yagiz. And instead of truly proving himself to be a trustworthy man, he'd tried to seduce her instead. Long story short, if not for Yagiz' heroic attempts to bring them together, and grace on Hazan’s part, Sinan would not have been back together with her. But AFTER being granted a second chance that he really didn’t earn, the guy missed it—AGAIN. This is how.

First, he undermined his brother’s authority as founder, owner, and CEO of Egemenlar Cosmetics, by signing a contractual agreement to bring an investor into the fold behind his brother's back, an investor who happened to be his psychopathic ex-girlfriend. Not only did he make a mockery of his brother's hard work and sacrifice thus far to keep their company afloat, but his current girlfriend’s as well. 

I understand Sinan wanted to help, but it is what it is. Mockery is mockery.

Second, he made a mess of things with him posing as Kerime’s son and so became exhausted with all its complications. But instead of trying to find a solution with his girlfriend, he checked out and went for an ENTIRE WEEK having sleepovers at his ex-pyschopath ex-girlfriend's house.

And the twit had the nerve to call Hazan out for being distant… 

Of course she flippin was! But what caused it in the first place! 

The best PRESENT that a lover could ever hope to receive is their lover’s PRESENCE.

But Sinan, this is kinda what you’ve been ever since you got a second chance to be with Hazan again—M.I.A.

The times that Hazan truly NEEDED support in her life, like when Ece was accused for poisoning Hazim, it was Yagiz who provided that crucial support. If you really KNEW Hazan in the first place, much like Yagiz, family is the bedrock of why she does what she does. Family has always been an impetus for making and breaking her. But your spiting Hazan’s family, never giving them the benefit of the doubt, really speaks volumes of what you are in Hazan’s life—

UNAVAILABLE.

And up to E35, it was happening all over again. You accusing Ece—this time as the culprit for your sister’s miscarriage, and again, making you and Hazan opponents of each other. But even before then, you’ve been unavailable to her because of a stupid scheme you yourself cooked up, by posing as Kerime’s son—making yourself available in another woman’s home instead.

Let’s just call it what it is...

PART IV — Even When You Say It Isn't... 

The Nature of Hazan and Sinan's relationship has shifted.

Lovers they no longer are—they haven’t been for a very long time. And since we’ve decided to call things for what they are—lies for lies, and truth for TRUTH...

Lovers, is the description that is now more, and have been, TRUE for Yagiz and Hazan—

For how INTIMATE their relationship is. 

And THAT is just a TRUTH that Yagiz and Hazan does not truly comprehend themselves, and try to RUN AWAY from.

But TRUTH just IS. It just cannot be “NOT”. 

When Truth “is not”, it will no longer be called Truth. It is something else; Either a MIXTURE of some truth with something else—Or just plain LIES. The point is, it is NO LONGER Truth. Like I said above, you can’t add to or take away from truth. Truth, as it is—IS. And if Truth just IS, it cannot be killed or die. Check this—whatever was true at one time in a person’s life, if and when that person themselves dies, the truth STILL REMAINS about them. Whether they were married or not, whether they had children or not, and so on. The Truth just can’t one day be “no more” for again, it just IS. What it can be, though, is OBSCURED with something, which is the only thing you can do to “do away” with truth—

Hide it. 

But just as the sun that can only be hidden with dark clouds but CANNOT be denied its existence—nor its power; Beyond those obscuring agent, Truth is LIGHT that shines upon things in the dark that causes them to be in the dark NO MORE—that’s why we say to lie to somebody is to “keep them in the dark”. This is why Yagiz could not find a solution when he returned to his mother’s grave for the second time. The first time there, he found reprieve in confessing that he was in love with his brother’s beloved, despite his every attempt to be otherwise. In the deep hour of the dark under the moonlight, his confession was uttered. With only the thick of night as its witness. And God. And there in confessing the TRUTH, the LIGHT shined in the dark night of Yagiz soul, and Yagiz found some rest. But when he returned in the light of day, he was a man deprived of rest and peace, just talking to the dead;

What Yagiz Egemen failed to see is that things that are alive do not belong in graveyards. The dead belong with the dead. But the living belong with the living. And Yagiz’ love…

Is very much ALIVE. 

And that is the TRUTH that cannot be killed, buried, or do away with. 

It is what it is. 

Ever since the TRUTH came out at the end of E13 and A NEW BEGINNING commenced as E14 began, a bond so singular and exclusive was forged between Yagiz and Hazan, that even in its young stage, it had rendered Sinan INCAPABLE of approaching and disrupting them. That bond grew, like silver forged in and through fire, and became stronger and stronger, clearer and clearer, and more refined from its impurities. 

BUT… just like how LIES had set Yagiz and Hazan apart and AGAINST one another in the very beginning, LIES as well were THREATENING what they now have with each other, one more time causing them to be at odds with one another. But the difference is, they now have so much more to lose—

EACH OTHER.

The question is… is it WORTH IT?

Losing each other, that is. 

And so ladies and gents, this is where I must end this review. Like, seriously 😅. And before y’all proceed to light my hair on fire—let me explain. In writing this review, I realized it’s so long and comprehensive, I had to actually break it into 3 reviews. And so this is PART 1 of it. I wanted to get something to you as soon as I can, so I posted this Part 1 first. So please don’t kill me 😬. Next post, PART 2 on— 

YAGIZ & HAZAN: A Love Story.

[anonthenullifier]

First I love all your stories, they are amazing! Second can you write something post iw? They won, everyone is back except vision and Wanda isn't doing great (nightmares and grief) so tony and Shuri decide to bring him back somehow and yeah, happy ending, pretty please?

Thank you :D 

Sure thing! I hope this fulfills your request and meets your idea of how this could happen. Also, it ended up much longer than planned, so I hope that’s okay. 

AO3 Link

All is Right Once More

Wanda swore to the Avengers she would never touch their minds again, without permission anyway, and she has held to that promise as best she can, but sometimes their thoughts are too loud. Which is one of the numerous downfalls to having telepathic powers–incidentally picking up on thoughts and emotions, typically ones that are either particularly strong or directed towards her (sometimes both). If only her teammates understood how easily their misguided concern and silent judgment of her behavior morphed into an invasive species, overtaking her own mind, and crowding out all other avenues of escape. Currently every single mind in the compound is focused on her and it is overwhelming, her fingers cramping as she grips the pillow, folding the soft object around her head to muffle the sound of their cognitions.

The nexus of their concern is easily discernible, she had another nightmare, the same one as the night before, and the one before that, and really it has been recurring since she came back, since her body was forced from the welcome relief of death and thrust back into the bleakness of living. How can they expect her to be grateful, to accept this, to not scream at night at the memories of Vision’s face, at his gentle reassurances, at the feel of decimating the love of her life, and then at watching him be brought back and killed? The residue of his existence is stitched into her palms, itching incessantly, flaring up at every memory, every memento, every whispered mention of him. It has been so bad Wanda can’t even sleep in her room, his smell somehow clinging to every surface, her eyes always drawn to the walls, anticipation building at his head popping through, his face concerned and embarrassed when she reminds him to knock. But he won’t be coming through the wall, the soft lilt of his voice as he says her name forever silenced, his  I love you  haunting her because she was never able to return it.  

The ripples of her teammates’ conversations lap in and out of her awareness  We need to talk to her ,  She needs help ,  What if she breaks?  They are clearly concerned, perhaps they should be. Stark once called her a weapon, a source of terrifying power and destruction, one strong enough to hold off Thanos and destroy an infinity stone simultaneously. Everyone in the movies knows how dangerous it is to cross wires, make a wrong move while in the presence of a ticking bomb, and she can feel the power stirring in her, the barely contained fury writhing just under her skin.  They are worried if they say something wrong, if they aren’t gentle enough she might explode.  I think we need to tell her about him.  Wanda freezes at the thought, eyes shuttering as she concentrates on the source, pinpointing the hesitant suggestion to one of the labs. An equally tentative response reaches her,  Yeah but what if it doesn’t work?

Wanda sits up in her borrowed bed, her scarlet tinged hands brushing the sweat-dampened strands from her face. Slowly she places her feet on the ground, mind honed in to the lab, desperately seeking any other information without prying and breaking her promise. When nothing transmits beyond a slight flutter of what might be hope or could be terror, she stands, arms crossing over her chest as she grips herself, her feet carrying her along the hallways until she reaches the dimly lit research quarter of the compound. There is one light on, the same one that has been on since they all returned after Thanos was thoroughly destroyed. Wanda swallows down her panic, cinches her arms tighter to tamper the tremble forming in her body as she inches forward, mind preparing to see the gray, lifeless color of Vision’s skin, his body kept in a temperature controlled cradle, the team never reaching a decision on what, precisely, to do with his corpse. After at least a dozen failed simulations of how to bring him back, Wanda offered the suggestion of a proper burial, desiring and needing closure, yet there was strong pushback from the sciency types, reassurance that they shouldn’t be too hasty, just in case.

“What are you doing?” Wanda’s hands lift, scarlet erupting around her knuckles as she takes in Tony and Shuri standing near Vision.

Stark turns towards her first, his mouth morphing into a cocky grin, one that is expected but hollow, the dark bags under his eyes betraying his own lack of sleep, though his is a combination of nightmares, guilt, and the newborn baby that refuses to sleep. Wanda still isn’t sure why fate allowed Stark to procreate, but that is beyond the scope of her current situation. “Wanda, fancy seeing you here.”

She raises her hands a bit higher, spreading them out as the power grows between them. “What are you doing?”

“We,” Shuri nods towards Tony, a quick reassuring smile flashing across her face, begging Wanda to lower her hands, “think we figured out how to bring Vision back.”

The information shouldn’t be a surprise, it has been their goal, an impossible task the team clings to as a means of rectifying the losses they all accrued, yet it still shocks her, the admission freezes her blood, turns her stomach over, hope a nauseating enemy after all they’ve been through. “Will you ever let me just move on?”

Her words seem to impact Tony the most, his facade of fashionable indifference tumbling into a deep, sorrowful frown, his hands wringing anxiously as he stares directly at the scarlet still protruding from Wanda’s hands. “If we fail this time, then you can bury him.” His tone is laced with grave sincerity one that continues to permeate the silence as they wait for her to either acquiesce or deny their request.

Wanda pushes between them, stopping once her toes meet the resistance of the cradle and her hand can descend onto the clear glass, a harsh mimicry of the first time she was in Vision’s presence, when his mind and body were brimming with life and possibilities, while now there is nothing to sense with her powers no matter how hard she tries to reach him. “How?”

“I’ve been analyzing the neurological data from,” Shuri pauses, the same pause all of them (except for Drax, before the Guardians left) use when referring to the pre-snap time, “Wakanda. I believe there is enough there to help me map the majority of his neural networks and Helen has offered to reconstruct both his frontal lobe and forehead.”

“Plus we have the Mindstone,” Tony adds the information though it is unnecessary given it rests in a guarded and locked safe in the compound.

Shuri steps up next to Wanda, studying Vision’s still face before placing her hand on Wanda’s shoulder, “I’ll need you too.”

This tactic is new, the plans for the reconstruction of Vision long germinating, but never before did they approach her or imply that she might be useful in bringing him back. “I don’t know anything about this stuff.”

“Nope,” the woman smiles and it’s surprisingly playful, gentle yet also resolute, a victory forming in her eyes, telling Wanda that there is an endgame and Shuri knows exactly what it is. “But you know his mind better than anyone, you can help us fill in any gaps.”

For a brief, fleeting millisecond, Wanda allows some hope to blossom in her chest, and it is just long enough to utter an, “Okay.”

It’s been ten days, each one Wanda has spent sitting in a chair against the wall of the lab, the balls of her feet flat on the seat while her arms clutch her knees. Her eyes rarely leave the table where they’ve laid Vision’s body, the discoloration of his skin causing him to blend in with the metal slab, but with each passing session the concave profile of his forehead is built up, a process punctuated by sparks from the soldering of the synthetic axons and the inevitable cussing, both in English and Wakandan, as Shuri shoos Tony away every time something seemingly goes wrong. It’s when Helen joins them, squeezing Wanda in a heartfelt hug upon entering the lab, that a jitteriness develops in Wanda’s limbs, one that makes her incapable of continuing her silent vigil against the wall. She observes with interest as Helen passes the newly improved portable cradle back and forth over Vision’s forehead, his skin reforming into a patch of crimson, one that looks so out of place against the rest of his body that it pricks at Wanda’s eyes, the normalcy of seeing his true skintone almost too much to handle.

Once the synthesizing stops and the Mindstone is returned to him, Wanda finds her arm moving on its own, her hand running along the new patch of skin, savoring the unique, familiar texture against her fingertips. “Wanda,” her name is whispered, as if anything louder would somehow trigger a switch and eradicate the world. “It’s your turn.”

Unlike the rest of the process, there is no well-defined protocol or order of operations for Wanda’s portion, just a hypothesis that Wanda will know what she’s looking for once she is inside his brain. Wanda nods while removing her hand from his skin, leaving it to hover just over the Mindstone. Scarlet cascades from her fingers, pouring into his forehead as her eyes close and her head tilts to the side. “There’s,” she searches deeper, eyelids tightening as desperation builds in her chest, her lungs beginning to spasm at the sheer emptiness of his mind. Aggravation and anger replaces the desperation, her fingers clamping shut as she turns her ire towards the others in the room, “there’s nothing there.”

“I- um,” Tony’s confidence wavers, choosing a fine time to be flummoxed and stuttering for the first time in his existence, “I- Shuri?”

The young royal’s response is far more measured, an impressive stillness of her aura as she concentrates on solving the problem. “When you touched his mind in the cradle,” a story she kindly asked Wanda to tell her multiple times in great detail, “there was an outside power source, correct?”

“Yes, he was in the cradle.”

Shuri grins, a snap of her fingers kickstarting her body as she hooks the cradle back up to the lab generator (they had removed it so they could channel the electricity to their other tools).  “We can’t expect the same results without replicating the original experiment.” The woman stares at them expectedly, eyes wide and a grin on her face as she waits for them. “We need to put him,” Shuri gesticulates while she talks, an interpretive dance informing them of what she’s asking them to do, “back in there.”

Together they move Vision from the table into the cradle, Wanda’s powers would be more than enough to complete the task but she allows the others to feel like they are helping. Her heart almost stops beating when they close the door, the shroud of glass closing him in his casket once more. Shuri walks around the cradle, flipping switches and pushing buttons, and then there is a beep, followed by another and then another and for the first time since Wanda returned from being dust, there is actual data streaming from Vision’s body instead of the grim, dark screen of an inactive monitor. “Try now.”

Wanda inhales as she approaches the cradle, elbows bent and hands placed on the glass. The first time she felt this there was a sense of wonderment, a surreal awe at being the first to touch a mind, now there is a similar flutter in her chest though not one due to connecting with a brand new consciousness, but with feeling him again, the soothing, golden, gorgeous waves of Vision. “I can feel him.”

“Okay,” the word vibrates with enthusiasm as Shuri activates the kimoyo bead at her wrist, pulling up a hologram of Vision’s mind, “tell me if anything feels off.”

A first scan reveals nothing alarming, but Wanda isn’t willing to reach conclusions based on one sweep and so she explores his mind, each time going just a bit deeper. “Here,” on the hologram there is a blotch of red where Wanda is concentrating her powers, “it needs to go to the left.”

“Got it,” Shuri inserts her finger into the image, pinching and then expanding her fingers to zoom in until she sees what Wanda has found, and then she inches the neuron just a bit to the left and Wanda nods.

“That’s better.”  Twenty three more sweeps reveal only three other areas of concern, though the last is more than simply an askew neuron. “There’s,” Wanda inserts her powers deeper, head cocking right and then left as she searches the area,”there’s a whole section that’s,” it’s not missing nor slightly off, it’s as if his neurons are mangled and unrecognizable. They exist but not in any pattern Wanda has felt before, “Off.”

Wanda turns towards Shuri and watches as the image zooms in to the location of her powers. “It’s part of what Thanos destroyed, in the frontal lobe. I-,” for the first time in the process Shuri seems uncertain of what to do next, and Wanda’s body reacts immediately, her heart racing and the hairs on her arm standing on end, unwilling to get this close just to fail again. “I didn’t have the data for it so we simply had to put something there.”

“What does this area do?”

Stark has been oddly silent during the entire thing, his fingers usually gleefully dipping into every project without asking but for this he’s simply been watching, which is why his voice causes Wanda to flinch. “Lots of things, problem solving, logic, personality, language, motor functions, sex drive,” when Wanda glares at him he gives her a half hearted shrug, “hey, that’s an important function too.”

Everything in the list seems vital to bringing Vision back as himself, which is incredible, that such a small portion could affect so much. If it was any other situation, Wanda would allow herself to be amazed at the intricacies of the human body, currently, however, she can feel a seething despair consuming her mind. “If it stays like this?”

The response is slow, evenly paced and the words are chosen very diplomatically as Shuri watches Wanda through the golden hologram. “He could be quite different.”

Wanda’s mouth settles into a serious scowl at the words, all tiredness leaving her body as she stares through the glass separating her from Vision. Bringing him back is only worth doing if she can have Vision, not some other person who happens to have his body. “I guess we need to sort this out then.”

A broad, determined toothy grin forms on Shuri’s face, “I’ve got no other plans.” 

Being in the lab means time has no meaning, the only windows lead to hallways which also aren’t connected to the outside world. It may have only been an hour since they started the process or it could have been two days, two weeks even, the only marker of passing time is Stark leaving and coming back, muttering about poopy diapers and spit up (though he smiles as he complains, fatherhood suiting him surprisingly better than anyone thought, not great, three pairs of his designer glasses already broken, but well nonetheless). Painstakingly Wanda and Shuri sort through the bundle of connections deep within Vision’s synthetic gray matter, crossing some neurons while disconnecting others and redirecting them. Eventually it feels familiar, the puzzle of Vision’s mind finally complete. Even though he hasn’t done much, it’s Stark that declares the victory, drawing a thick, black line through Wanda’s name on the list they’d compiled at the onset of their experiment, “So we get Thor now?”

Ideally they need to recreate the entire process of Vision’s original creation, but they’ve already diverged from it, among other things there was no Ultron, no Pietro, Shuri did more work than Tony, and Wanda has been far more involved in manipulating Vision’s mind. “I think,” Wanda concludes all of these novel additions means it’s fine to keep changing things, “I can do it.”

“Last I checked you’re not a thunder god.” 

Shuri rolls her eyes at Tony’s asinine observation, “No shit, Sherlock.”

Wanda ignores them both, her stare never leaving Vision’s face while her fingers brush over the cradle, palms recalling the way it felt to take his life and longing to give it back to him. “I can do it, the Mindstone knows me.”

The only argument to her decision is a flailed hand from Tony, one that says  Fine, do whatever you want.  It seems he’s actually learned enough to not always verbalize his disagreements and so he steps back, pulling Shuri with him. Wanda collects her powers, pooling the scarlet from her limbs so that it congregates in her chest, from there she splits it, one half traveling down her right arm and the other her left. In her mind she can hear him whisper,  You can never hurt me Wanda , and she sends the first two tendrils through the glass, hooking them around the Mindstone as an anchor for the rest of her powers.  It’s alright . A low groan escapes her lips as she shoves her palms forward, scarlet streaming in thick, crackling waves into the Mindstone,  It’s alright . There’s little change as she pushes herself harder, directing every ounce of power into the Mindstone, tears tumbling down her cheeks at how tired she is, not having slept in days, possibly even a week, but she can’t stop, somehow finds another reservoir of energy and pushes harder. I love you .   Another pulse of power and there is a shift, infinitesimal and almost imperceptible but she focuses on it, sends another thread of scarlet to the active area in the stone and grimaces as she feels her knees beginning to give out, but then there is a subtle glow, the Mindstone awakening and Wanda shoves the final tide of power at Vision, thrusting the last of her strength, short circuiting the machinery and lights in the lab, and then collapses against the glass.

Her eyes crack open, the flickering lights work in tandem with her tears to discombobulate her senses. It may be a hallucination, it might even be a dream, maybe she finally fell asleep, but she thinks the patch of crimson on his forehead has spread, that it continues to spread as the Mindstone flickers like an ember. Suddenly a hand rams into the glass, causing Wanda to yell and fall back, another thud and Tony rushes to the cradle, calling out to Shuri to help him open the door. Wanda can’t see what’s happening, her view blocked by the two bodies at the cradle.

“Wanda?” This has to be a nightmare, she reasons, because that voice hasn’t existed in reality in what feels like an eon. “Where’s Wanda?”

It’s only when she hears Stark’s voice, takes in the surprise and unbridled joy of his, “Vision!” that she realizes what’s happening, that even if this is somehow a dream, it is at least not a nightmare. Her hands and feet frantically work to help her stand and it’s then that she sees him, his torso and head sticking straight up out of the cradle, his movements uncharacteristically wild until his cerulean eyes lock on to her and she can count the slow whirling of his irises.

“Wanda.” The intonation of her name, the rounded w and well-enunciated d have been seared into her memory for so long it allows her to confirm instantly it is him, yet she still reaches for his mind, rediscovers its vibrancy and elegance, though she also feels the confusion and anxiety billowing up from the depths of his brain.

Wanda hopes to quell his nerves, “Vizh.” Saying his name is difficult, the syllables of his identity having been silent on her tongue since she yelled out to him, yet once she says it, it sloughs the weight of sorrow from her shoulders, frees her to feel a wavering, hesitant joy. “Vision!”  Her feet carry her towards him, eyes locked on his body phasing from the cradle, his uniform still singed but its color returning with each passing second, and when they meet her arms cling to his waist and his engulf her, pulling her to his chest while he kisses her head. Wanda eases her hold on him, backing up enough to tilt her head up, stare into his swirling eyes, memorizes and gets lost in the adoring smile that curves his lips up. “Vision,” she lifts onto the tips of her toes, giddy at how he responds, bending at the waist as he brings his face closer to hers, death unable to remove the deeply ingrained, automatic way their bodies move together. “Vizh.”

A tingle forms along her scalp as his fingers run through her hair, “Wanda.”

“I love you, too.” The smile on his face broadens, irises twisting faster before his eyelids close and he presses his lips to hers, and all, finally, is right with the world once more.

[hyotaem]

why kim kibum is a RAVENCLAW

first of all kim kibum’s ugly ass can fight me for shoving his “““““““““““slytherin””””””””””” self in my face with all his stupid instagram posts this is the FIRST time i haven’t been excited about him posting. now let’s be real here the sorting hat must’ve been smoking some crack or something if it put kibum in slytherin………. he’s CLEARLY A RAVENCLAW and i have PROOF. SO MUCH proof that i’m about to write six pages of this shit!!!! ten virtual bucks and all of miss sha’s love to you if you actually read all of my anger induced rambling :)

okay!! now let’s get rowling’s awfully one dimensional and un-fleshed-out definition of what a ravenclaw is out of the way : the smart ones. that’s it. “wit beyond measure is man’s greatest treasure” blah blah all of that. basically the way she set it up in the (amazing) shitshow that was the harry potter books, most people interpreted it as “oh you do well in academics and stuff you get straight as and all that cool jazz so you must be a ravenclaw!” EXCEPT. getting good grades isn’t the only type of intelligence you can have and this especially applies to kibum because although i don’t know how well he did in school i do know that he has immense creative intelligence that screams ravenclaw AND NOT FUCKING SLYTHERIN GOD DAMN IT. also point number two!! if that was the only thing that made you a ravenclaw then hermione wouldn’t be a goddamn gryffindor. if you think back to book one (for those of you that have forgotten already, that’s the sorcerer’s stone or the philosopher’s stone depending on where you came from - a completely unnecessary change that still baffles me because despite the fact that americans are dumb i don’t think we’re THAT dumb that we wouldn’t know what a philosopher is but i digress) there’s that scene while they’re in room with the logic test with the poison and she says something along the lines of “yeah logic and cleverness is great and all but bravery and friendship is where it’s at harry!! now go beat voldemort’s ass!” (keep in mind i don’t have the books in front of me right now lol) it’s because she values those gryffindor qualities more than she values the qualities of intelligence that she was placed in gryffindor but that wasn’t very well expanded on in the books and it isn’t super relevant to ravenclaw kibum so i’ll move on.

one of my biggest points is the whole intelligence isn’t limited to getting good grades in school one. so in 1983 a developmental psychologist (don’t know what that is and i’m too lazy to google but i’m assuming he knew what he was talking about) came up with this theory?? idea?? whatever. that there are in fact nine different types of intelligence and you can’t bullet point in essays so bear with me: there’s naturalist intelligence which is like nature and stuff… not my thing and not kibum’s either so we’ll move forward; musical intelligence - let’s stop this list right here so i can point a giant finger at kibum’s obvious musical talent (which fingers crossed we’ll get to see in his solo album which will happen i have hope) - logical/mathematical (it took me four tries to spell that right could you believe i used to be a three time school spelling bee champion hahhahhahah) which is what i believe most people think of when they think “intelligence;” existential (why do we exist? what is our purpose here on earth? what the fuck exactly is a human? what is consciousness? this is for the ones who have existential crises every other day congrats you’re smart). this paragraph is getting too long lemme move to the next one -

yes hi where were we : interpersonal! this is a another one i think kibum has a lot of; he’s really extroverted and have you ever noticed that he knows like. everyone because he makes friends super easily and everything?? he knows how people work and he’s comfortable around them. next, linguistic intelligence, which he possesses a lot of too - we all know the man’s smart as hell when it comes to languages it’s real sexy; intra-personal (this is like…. knowing yourself and your thoughts/feelings which sounds fake to me but whatever); and last but not least (or yes least depending on how much of it you have) spatial intelligence which yeah kibum has a lot of because this applies to visual art and stuff and also comes in handy if you’re an engineer. (shout out to any of those reading this now stop and go do your job or something fucking nerds!)

so we’ve established that kibum is super intelligent, especially creatively, which you already should’ve known if you’ve been a shawol for longer than two seconds or aren’t stanning solely for visuals… my point is : kibum’s a smart dude!! so one box for ravenclaw checked! i’m not trying to say if you’re not a ravenclaw you’re stupid by the way because all of this means jack shit if you don’t value your intelligence, which brings us back to the whole situation with hermione - she was in gryffindor because gryffindor’s qualities were more important to her. but i think it’s clear kibum takes a whole lot of pride in his creative accomplishments and he’s always looking to add more to his loooooong resumé of cool shit i’ve done at such a young age (taemin has one of those except his is cool shit i’ve done at an even younger age). it’s these traits of his that stand out the most in my opinion which checks another ravenclaw kibum box!

completely unrelated to actual house sorting but kibum looks incredible in blue. pretend i attached pictures for reference.

listen being in ravenclaw isn’t all flowers and rainbows (that’s more hufflepuff; you can find them in the kitchens xx). this emphasis on logic and intelligence can often create a chasm between the more human side of things. ravenclaws tend to forget that emotion plays just a big a part in how things work as pure, cold logic does - which obviously doesn’t always apply, because interpersonal intelligence is a facet of ravenclawism?? let’s pretend that’s a word. ravenclaws can also be real perfectionists and super hard on themselves. and don’t forget that they can get big heads too - placing a higher value on intelligence, creative or not, doesn’t make you better than the rest of the houses, ravenclaws.

trust me, i know. i’m a ravenclaw. fuck pottermore.

i just realized something. in any proper school essay, you never just jump into things the way i did. idk if any of you learned tags?? theme, author, general, specific (or something like that; forgive me if i can’t remember, oh sophomore year honors english teacher) but yeah i forgot to do all that and just kinda went KIBUM IS A RAVENCLAW FUCK HIM so…

i’m assuming whoever’s reading this has either read and/or watched at least one of the harry potter books/movies. if you’ve only ever seen the movies (or worse, just one movie) get the fuck out of my sight! nah, just kidding, i’m ready to explain all this shit to y’all. so buckle in, kids and non kids, because you’re about to have a crash course on hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry completely from my shitty memory!

so hogwarts is this amazing school in england that teaches young, impressionable kids magic tricks but with real magic. it’s the wave your wand, say the latin inspired magic words, and boom! you just turned your rat into a teacup (or if you’re ron, you got stuck halfway and now peter pettigrew is having the worst time of his life since [spoiler]). it’s pretty much the most dangerous place you can send your kid especially if one (1) harry james potter is in the student body, because this snake man with no nose is coming to get him because he’s holding a ten year or so grudge that he couldn’t kill him when he wanted to. also [spoiler] plays a part in that lmao voldemort isn’t that shallow. but he is pretty shallow.

on your first day at this super cool school you put a magic talking hat on your head and it compartmentalizes you into one of four houses based on your personality, your values, and your strengths. it’s like divergent except less black and white. (and if you’ve seen/read divergent and not harry potter get your fucking priorities in order wtf???) you’ve probably heard of these houses - gryffindor, slytherin, ravenclaw, and hufflepuff - even if you know shit about harry potter because you’re friend has said to you “oh yeah i’m a hufflepuff” and you went “oh cool haha sounds fucking dumb” and unfortunately for your poor hufflepuff friend most people look down on hufflepuff. thank god that’s changing and fuck rowling for making it that way. no one has time for her silly “all slytherins are evil” narrative.

rowling-wise (hope y’all are realizing by now that i’m not her biggest fan) the houses are pretty much as one-dimensional as divergent was: gryffindor was for the big, strong, brave people; ravenclaw for the smart; slytherin for… well, evil; and everyone else gets to be a hufflepuff and get labelled as nice. nothing wrong with being nice, but if you’re just nice, you’re boring, and hey, hufflepuffs don’t deserve that. maybe it’s tweaking canon a bit, but fandom has collectively shifted away from these stereotypes and effectively (more effectively than rowling, at least) expanded on what actually makes a gryffindor a gryffindor and so forth. (also, yeah, i thought i was a hufflepuff for years before i took a good look at myself in the mirror and realized i’m a lazy piece of shit that doesn’t deserve to be in that house)

off the top of my head, hogwarts was founded by four wizards with varying levels of assholishness, and their last names are where we get the houses. each one of them basically picked the qualities they wanted to see in their students (gg : “i want the loudmouths who are brave and awesome!” rr: “i want the ones who think being smart is sexy” ss: “i want the ambitious prideful ones” and lovely helga hufflepuff was like “cool i’ll just take the rest they’re amazing too”) and so the houses were formed. things quickly unraveled after that because mr. slytherin was a racist piece of shit and he only wanted the “pure-blooded” families to send their kids to hogwarts (meaning the ones wizarding families who were all wizards) and the rest were like “wtf bro?? what about the mixed kids. or the random muggle-borns blessed with the ability to bewitch??” and salazar was like “nah i’m out goodbye fuckers i hate you all for being open-minded and shit.” so, i mean, it really doesn’t come as a surprise that slytherin gets such a bad rep considering the first ever slytherin was on the high end of the asshole spectrum. and then all that shit with the [spoiler] in chamber of secrets happened, so not only was he an asshole, but he was also fucking insane. good riddance. but the rest stayed, and they made hogwarts famous, and then they died and became ghosts to haunt the corridors of the school or whatever.

so now that your brief hogwarts, a history lesson is over, let’s talk a little more about slytherin because i feel like it! also the whole idea about all slytherins being evil, power-hungry, greedy fuckers is wrong and needs to be dispelled. yes, power does play a huge role in who a slytherin is, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be a “crush everyone underneath me” kind of thing - it’s more like an ambition-driven one. sure, a lot of slytherins are bad, like, say, voldemort, who was so obsessed with power and living forever that he pretty much killed himself, with a little bit of help from our lovely hero harry. and like… i could go into detail about how horrible and abusive snape was (yes he did have a few good qualities but they certainly weren’t redeeming ones fuck off) but i’d max out the number of pages for this essay so maybe another time. if you’re a snape apologist…… well i hope you see the light soon. that’s a real stain on your person. but yeah - not every single slytherin you see is pure evil; regulus black exists (please read the books) and like. narcissa malfoy just wanted to protect her son, you know? doesn’t excuse most of the shit she did but her intentions weren’t completely “oh i want to be powerful also i’m better than everyone because i’m pureblood and you’re not haha.”

also taemin!! there’s a lovely slytherin. smart, ambitious, sweet, great smile, i’ll stop before this turns into a soft rant - taemin is textbook slytherin but surprise he isn’t in the game just so he can put other people down. and i wasn’t serious about my other if you’re blank then stop reading this but if you don’t think taemin’s a slytherin you can exit. right now. i’m serious i don’t want to be associated with y’all. AND IT’S EVEN WORSE IF YOU THINK HE’S A HUFFLEPUFF!!! you’re going to put lee “work over relationships” taemin into hufflepuff? he’s pure slytherin; he’s driven by ambition - idk if you noticed when he was talking about his budokan concerts but he mentioned how he worked so hard on it for his own sake. he wanted to prove to himself as well as others that he could pull off something so grand and incredible (and he did but once again that’s soft rant territory so i’ll pull back) and that’s slytherin. this isn’t necessarily in a bad way, but he’s so willing to throw his members under the bus for his own sake - go watch their weekly idol. THAT DOESN’T MAKE HIM EVIL LMAO a big part of being a slytherin is relationships with others!! when the worst comes to worst, loyalty is important to slytherins. it’s not one of their defining characteristics like it is for gryffindor but it’s still super important. that’s not to say he doesn’t have hufflepuff traits (y’know, working hard! being dedicated!) but those coupled with entirely slytherin motivations of proving oneself and becoming the best they can be point him towards slytherin’s direction. slytherins have a tendency of throwing everyone and everything away (including, many times, themselves) for the sake of achieving their goal and taemin is a perfect example of that. sure, he’s as sweet as a person who laughs when other people are crying can be, but that doesn’t automatically make him a hufflepuff. it’s not like everyone who isn’t a hufflepuff is mean or that every hufflepuff is a gooey pile of chocolate and sunshine.

anyway… this is about kibum…

(fun fact : the animal associated with the ravenclaw house is actually an eagle. something about soaring to new intellectual heights or something. would’ve been easier to just make it a raven because it’s not like ravens can’t fly too but whatever.)

probably one of the biggest roadblocks with sorting people into hogwarts houses is the overlap that occurs between traits of different houses. having one trait - or even a few of them - doesn’t automatically mean you fit solidly into a house, because you have to take your own ideals and values into account, as well as the way you approach things in life. it’s not to say kibum isn’t ambitious, because yeah, he is, but the way his ambition is directed towards his creative pursuits for the sake of expanding his creative intelligence is a ravenclaw thing you know?? same with jonghyun (who is also a ravenclaw) - the way he approaches all of his creative pursuits is completely in the artistic sense. jonghyun is creatively brilliant - let’s look at his radio show, or his song-writing, or his composing, or his book writing, etc. - and just because he’s a ravenclaw doesn’t mean he’s not ambitious. sure he’s ambitious but is anyone sitting here calling him a slytherin?? no, seriously - does anyone think jonghyun’s a slytherin? because i’ve never seen that. most people put him in hufflepuff and not ravenclaw… but why? is it because he’s soft? because that’s a hell of a stereotype, too, and it’s not like all ravenclaws are cold, emotionally detached bitches who only care about getting 100 percents on their quizzes.

what i’m trying to say is people can’t be categorized into boxes the way the houses were originally constructed; otherwise, most of the population would just be hufflepuffs. sorting also takes your personal wishes, your goals, what you think is important into consideration. so, yeah, if kibum really wanted he could totally be a slytherin, but it would pretty much be for the sake of being a slytherin because that cunning is not what he deems most important. let’s go back to harry potter himself - the sorting hat was really fucking ready to put him in slytherin, and as much as you can argue that it was because a piece of voldemort, of evil, was in him or whatever, you can’t deny that harry has a lot of inherently slytherin traits. he knows how to work people, he knows how to get out of tricky situations because he’s witty and yeah, cunning as hell. and yes, he asked not to be put in slytherin, but that’s mainly because he walked into hogwarts having heard nothing but stereotypes about the house (like that one line that ron said about how not everyone in slytherin was evil but how everyone evil came from slytherin, the whole square rectangle relationship). and keep in mind that he didn’t specifically ask to be put into gryffindor but that the sorting hat recognized those qualities that he also had and the fact that he valued them more as well and made the decision to sort him into gryffindor.

sorting is a tricky business, thanks to those gray areas. there are ravenclaws that could be academically behind others, but they work their asses off because they want to learn. hard work is, again, technically a hufflepuff trait but their objective, their main focus, is the learning aspect which makes them a ravenclaw! an excellent real life example would be minho, who you can argue has several gryffindor traits, like… he’s loud and i guess he’s brave and all, but hufflepuff fits him a thousand times better. the importance he places on relationships and especially loyalty is purely hufflepuff and he makes a damn good one, too. i think that’s what annoys me most about people who think taemin’s too “sweet” or “nice” to be a slytherin - i hate to break it to you, but not every slytherin is mean and selfish. they just value being at the top because they believe they deserve it, and you can’t really fault a person for that, and it doesn’t mean they think everyone else is automatically lesser, either.

i’m going to wrap this up now because i want to watch final life and i’ve also made pretty much every point i can think of right now. kibum might be out there dropping $100+ on overpriced slytherin wands and parading around in his slytherin scarf but honestly? i’m still convinced he’s a ravenclaw because it just fits him so much better. but i guess slytherin is a good second choice! he really made me angry enough to write an entire goddamn essay about this wow

[jeslyneyunita]

Some Reasons why I love Peniel’s VLOGS:

Let’s start from the very basic: 

1, The editing is dope!  

 And by that, I mean really, really good. Most of his shots and the quality of contents are above average!  I usually feel bored easily when watching vlog, but Peniel’s camera point of view is so beautiful as he showed the view in between places, from train, car, (also time lapse and stuffs) and.. yeah it also makes me even more excited to visit Japan again, someday. (hiks). And, remembering his profession as an active singer slash celebrity with packed schedule. I really admire Peniel’s commitment in shooting, editing and everything. 

2. The very simple titles given:

Well done! 1st! My worst enemy! or.. Tokyo! Udon! New Camera!

I love the very simple title, some are only consisted of one or two words. And the title given even makes me feel more curious to see the content compare to other Vlogs with such long title like here, here, and here. I guess he is the kind of like really easy going man so he just name the video what ever is on his head at that time, and (again) it’s kinda cute for me, lol

3. No cliche opening, ending, like, subscribe or anything.

Everytime I watch a youtubers or vlogs, I will always skip the last few second since it will be the same all over again. Please like, subscribe, blah blah blah, which is very cliche and… boring. And Peniel doesn’t do that! (teehee)

4. He speaks in English (almost all the time)! so I can do something else while watching his video. Like revising. Tried this before and it’s kinda work for me. Fun!

5. The content shows fans his daily activities and what are behind the scene of his profession. Like MV making, how long he’s waiting. Dry rehearsal, camera rehearsal, make up, change clothes, so on and so forth. Like it is kinda interesting to know about this stuffs directly from an idol perspective! (especially for international fans)

6. The background songs! it is usually one song per video which is good because it’s simple. But,,, what I like even more is, the songs are so good as well! Peniel rarely ever pick other artist’s song, so either it was BTOB’s songs, or his mixtape songs, which are very original! Represents his mood, preference, and profession, and make the audience feel even closer to his vlogs.

7. You can see BTOB members appeared randomly here and there in some of the videos. Either only their voice, in the background, or they’re singing, sleeping, sometimes giving random jokes; which is… super fun! Mostly those members will pop out speaking in little random english as well, bcs Peniel is speaking in fluent english, so again, yea that’s cute to see!

8. His english is pretty cute!

Like in my opinion (from what I heard), Peniel has a lisp right? and his english is nearly perfect as well (no grammar mistake whatsoever) which makes it become very pleasant to hear.

9. Bringing camera to every where. Rather than snapchat-ting or Insta Story-ing, why not youtubeing?

Yea at the first few videos my reaction was like… oh well why does he have to carry a camera or go pro to almost everywhere? Like it’s not really the culture for Korean or Japanese people bringing Gopro with the stabiliser at public space. But.. when I think about it again, Well other artists like Jessi and Tiffany (only two that I know) very often be seen  holding their phones for snapchatting as well during events. So, rather than filming for something that will only last for 24 hours, why not making it available for days, months, or even years? Yea Peniel’s idea is at a different level obviously saying.

10. He has manner, guys

Peniel doesn’t just record everywhere anytime out of nowhere. He often whispered, or typed, in order just not to bother other passengers or people around him. I think if he really wants to, he can just ignore those kind of situations, shoot in more places to create more fun contents. But, he will not shoot where he is not supposed to, to show respect towards other’s people privacy, then just say sorry to the audience (even when he doesn’t have to) and told us afterwards what was happening instead.

11. Last but not least, his effort in providing Korean subtitles!

I thought Peniel just has to edit videos and upload it directly so I didn’t get it at first when he mentioned about “I gotta do subtitle and stuff..”. And then… because he mention it very often (or I’ve just watched too many of his videos), just reckon that he has to translate ALL what he said (in English) into Korean to treat Korean fans/watchers.Well, job of editing and everything isn’t little already. And I can imagine, translating isn’t an easy (or fun) deal too.

But then, that’s probably why fans love his videos with all of the efforts given SO MUCH, and I hope he knows how so many people enjoy his videos and vlogging activities. And of course, including for me, I enjoy it very very much. Thank you Peniel! haaha..

Some of my recommendations (few of my most favourites) are..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXNf1qJDIoQ

-> the best part in this video is obviously… Changsub with his “OH MY CAP, OH MY CAP, OOHHHH IM SORRY” LOLL. Seriously you guys should watch it. It’s just sooo funny! haha.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKCDXZvJrfs&t=1s

-> I like the background song of this video very much, which makes me discover BTOB’s awesome Japanese songs as well. The content are awesome in this video too, lots of stuffs that makes me want to visit Japan. Anddd lastly, you can see  BTOB’s member’s randomness (with their english) popping out here and there too, lol.

// DO NOT take content away without permission PLEASE.

I’ve got enough with a random someone who paraphrase the whole content of this post, publish it at a Korean Entertainment News Portal and got noticed by Peniel on twitter -__- )) 

If you are a true writer or fan please respect the existence of copyright hence at least give proper credit to the actual writer. cheers! //

[expatsecuador]

10 Things You Should Know Before Moving to Ecuador

What do expats wish they knew before taking the plunge and moving to Ecuador? Turns out it's a lot. 

Some of these things might be surface level, and in that case, you have a good shot of picking them up on an investigative trip to Ecuador before committing to the move. Which, I fully encourage you to do by the way. 

But, others are not so easy to pick up and require a bit more digging until you're likely to come across them. So, visitors are not likely experience these on their investigative trip. 

I've covered surface and non-surface issues below in my compilation of what I consider to be the 10 most important things that the luxury of hindsight has given myself and fellow expats living in Ecuador. 

I think it's important for expats to have access to information that doesn't just paint Ecuador as a utopian expat destination. I also don't want you to read this and leave with an entirely negative view of Ecuador. I love it here and it has much to offer - despite some of the issues I dig into below. 

1. Noise

Obviously the type of noise you may experience differs from city to city, neighborhood by neighborhood. ie Moving to the mountains of Cuenca will be very different to the coastal towns of Manta or Olon.

But, regardless of where you decide to live, there is a strong possibility that noise will affect you in some way. Some of the most common noise nuisances in Ecuador include:

Speakers

We're talking about those big party speakers. These tend to me more of an issue around the weekend and fiestas, but they can be seriously out of control. If you're staying next door to bars or clubs, then it's to be expected.

What may be more surprising are the unofficial neighborhood parties that seem to last an entire weekend. Smaller towns and communities are not immune to this. We've been on several weekend escapes to the beaches or mountain towns where the persistent bass thumping has impacted our enjoyment. 

Gas trucks

Gas is delivered to homes via trucks throughout Ecuador. It's super cheap - $2 or $3 per tank. But, the delivery trucks blurt out a pretty horrendous song to let everyone know they are in the area. Think of an ice-cream truck song, only one that may give you a headache. 

One or two trucks per day may not be a big issue, but you may find that there is a lot of competition in your neighborhood, meaning you may have 5-10 trucks every day. 

Dogs

This can range from your more standard scenario where your neighbor has gone away for a few days and their dog is barking away, to a choir of street and pet dogs singing all night. Either way, it can be pretty frustrating and lead to sleepness nights. 

Roosters

Most likely to be found in rural and beach communities, crowing roosters can be alarmingly common. 

People talking

We aren't talking about a party atmosphere, just people having what appears to be an everyday conversation loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear. 

2. Cost of renting vs buying

When moving countries, it's tempting to sell the family home and buy a property in Ecuador. It can be especially tempting when the price of property in Ecuador is cheaper than your native country, theoretically giving you instant access to a considerable upgrade. 

But, there's many risks when purchasing property in Ecuador that you may not be able to easily safeguard against. We cover these risks in more detail in our guide to buying and renting in Ecuador. 

Please don't buy property in Ecuador unless you've done your proper due diligence. This is especially so given the price of renting property in Ecuador is so low. 

Rent for 6 months first. Then, when the rose colored glasses have dissipated, make an investment decision detached from the emotions associated with moving to a new country. 

3. Street dogs

You will encounter street dogs in Ecuador. This can be a confronting experience for some. Seeing neglected dogs on a daily occurrence still pulls at my heartstrings. We've taken in a couple of dogs, but until there is a shift in the general population on the responsibilities of dog ownership, street dogs will remain.

By all means, support your local dog shelters and charities, but understand that Ecuador is a developing country with more pressing priorities. 

4. Punctuality

There is a persisting cultural norm that punctuality doesn't matter. This is a pet-peeve of mine that no amount of meditation seems to absolve. Try not to take it personally if someone doesn't show up for an appointment on time, or at all. This covers both personal and business relationships.

Be prepared to harass your internet provider, bank, landlord, visa facilitator, maintenance workers etc. You will need to be proactive if you want stuff to get done.

5. The post (or lack of)

There is no functioning public postal service in Ecuador. Meaning you'll be relying on expensive private services like DHL for sending internationally or Servientrega for domestic.

Dealing with customs for international deliveries is a crapshoot. There is a real risk of not receiving your goods, or needing to pay high import fees if you want to collect them.  

6. Ecuadorian laws

Yes, laws differ from nation to nation. But, you may not be prepared for how the rule of law is applied in Ecuador compared to your native country. 

Navigating residential property leases, property contracts and service contracts (ie getting locked into an internet plan) are difficult for Ecuadorians and significantly harder for expats with limited Spanish.

Laws relating to starting and running a business are unnecessarily cumbersome (try to legally fire an Ecuadorian), which hampers innovation and makes it less appealing for expats to run local businesses.  

7. Driving

I consider Ecuador to be a safe country, but one area of law which scares me is the road rules. Particularly in the case of an accident where there is a policy of holding all drivers in jail until fault is determined. This can be days. 

And being a gringo, I hold a perceived risk of being found at fault because there is a financial incentive to do so - I've a greater chance of being able to pay damages to the victim. I've purchased a dashboard cam for this very reason as I want to be able to prove my innocence if need be. 

Getting a licence is a commitment. You won't be able to easily transfer your existing licence without having a bunch of forms from your native country apostiled. The other option is to have lessons which can take a few weeks to complete.  

Buying a car is more expensive in Ecuador that you'd first think. The taxes are high, which turns a car you'd buy in the US for $10K into an $18K - $20K investment. However, running a car is cheap with low gasoline prices and labor costs. 

8. Employment

Many expats are retirees living off social security, so employment isn't a concern for them. For those that need to earn an income, finding adequate local employment can be very difficult. 

Low minimum wage

The minimum wage is currently $400 per month. This is the legal minimum, not to be confused with the average wage. Finding employment that provides incentives greater than $2K per month is hard, for locals and expats alike. 

Language barrier

Expats generally have a significant language barrier they need to overcome too. If you don't speak Spanish fluently, your odds of finding a decent job are slim. 

Competition

There is a lot of competition, especially for unskilled jobs. If you don't have a skill that's in high demand or run your own business, it's going to be hard for you to find adequate employment. 

How to make money in Ecuador

The most common local jobs seem to be for English teachers or in tourism, but the pay can be very low. Many expats find that online or remote work provides the best effort vs reward. The most common roles are:

Online English teachers (for VIPkid or similar)

Transitioning current role in their native country to a remote role in Ecuador

Programming

Digital marketing (that's what I do)

9. Conveniences

Don't expect Amazon Prime-like conveniences. Online ecommerce is still in its infancy and the tech scene is yet to mature. Whilst fruit and vegetables are cheap, processed foods from the supermarket will cost more than you'd expect.

You simply won't have the easy access to consumer goods you're accustomed to. For many, this means filling suitcases with any nice-to-haves when holidaying in their native country or having friends and family visiting Ecuador doing the same. In particular, we recommend bringing electronics into Ecuador. 

10. Taxes

There's a variety of different taxes in Ecuador that are worth understanding. 

Import taxes

High import taxes hike up the prices of everything not produced in Ecuador. This is all pervasive and covers supermarket imports like your favorite cheese to cars.

It's a good idea to complete a budget during an investigative trip that covers all your expected day-to-day expenses and compare this with what you currently pay. 

Currency exit tax

Transferring money into Ecuador can be cheap and easy. But transferring cash out of Ecuador will invoke a 5% exit tax on any amount greater than 3 x the current basic salary ( as of 2020 it's 3 x $400 = $1,200). 

You'll need to pay the 5% tax whether it's transferred via a bank or carrying cash out through the airport. If you are caught lying at the airport, you'll forfeit much more than the 5%. 

Wrapping up

I hope this list sparked some topics for you to research further. There's a lot to take in when considering your move to Ecuador - this list is just the tip of the iceberg.

Feel free to let me know if there's a topic we've missed out or not covered in enough detail. 

from Expats Ecuador https://expatsecuador.com/know-before-moving/

[mikegchambers]

Nothing is Safer than Cloud

The security features of cloud providers give you the best processes, tools and practices to truly beef up your game

Padlocks floating in the matrix are especially secure.

There’s nothing like making broad claims with a headline featuring some dubious grammar, especially at the beginning of the week. But bear with me and we will slice and dice the ever-nagging issues of security in this post.

Get the Security Team On Board

In the on-premise enterprise world, IT security groups are becoming the Department of No. If you use any sort of agile release train, like frequent releases of mobile app versions for your organization, you’ll be familiar with scans, audits and the general slowdown that occurs when you enter the security orbit. Modern software is about change and yet change is the enemy of security in the on-premise environment.

This is a conundrum since you want to release software regularly but don’t want to be that executive who opened a security hole that caused the theft of all your client data. In fairness to the security folks, on-premise security is really difficult since it exists at many levels, it’s often applied as an after-thought and their job is like plugging a million microscopic holes in a dam.

In cloud there’s a better way, and it resolves the conflicting tension between needing to introduce changes in the software, and ensuring the environment is secure. There are four features that security teams will love (I’m picking from AWS here but similar magic exists elsewhere):

The security team can define the roles and rights of every user and process in the system, making it pretty much impossible to create new instances (servers) or deployments that open ports or violate security policies. Instead of policing per application, they can focus on the entire organization in an abstract, generalized way.

Automation at every level minimizes intentional damage or accidental screw-up. From machine images to auto-scaling and templating, you can guarantee that the 100,000th instance is using the same security policies as the first. This goes a long way to making sure that growing complexity in the environment doesn’t create vulnerabilities.

Security tools such as Amazon Inspector provide constant security assessments and look for weaknesses 24/7. These applications ensure that any windows left open are slammed shut asap.

Centralized automatic logging of every action, API call and event make it much easier to see what’s happening and isolate problems when they occur. This eliminates operating in stealth mode so audit trails abound for every user and process.

The TL;DR version is that cloud gives security teams a fully configurable sandbox where developers can play and get sand in their eyes but not burn down the playground in the process. This compares to on-premise, which is more like trying to keep watch over a hundred caffeinated 5-year olds in a knife store.

With proper configuration, a security team can own and monitor a bulletproof environment and not need to firefight on a per-project basis.

But really, how can my data ever be safe in the cloud?

This is a legitimate question especially for non-technical people but before I answer, let’s start with one mind-blowing fact that people often forget when discussing digital things.

For physical products, locking them up in a place where you can see them will deter thieves and usually stop them from being stolen. This works because (1) the thief may not know you have said riches (2) the riches are put in a place that’s hard to find and (3) the riches are secured with locks, safes and armed guards that make it easier for the thief to steal from other people.

Under no circumstances are the items ever totally immune from theft, it’s just that stealing the Hope Diamond is an order of magnitude more difficult than stealing cash from a gym locker. You also know when your riches are stolen because they are gone.

Hackers also freeze when a human enters the room.

For digital products and data, the same deterrents don’t work the same way. If your corporate data is stored on your CEO’s laptop on the top floor of a heavily guarded building, the thief doesn’t need to enter the lobby Matrix-style to physically reach the laptop.

Hackers will attempt to breach your network, overcome digital security safeguards and then copy the file(s) if they find them. You may never know the data has been stolen because the original file is still there. Or the boss might just use the password Password123 and accidentally leaves his PC in the back of a taxi — that’s more common than you’d think.

So why is cloud safer than on-premise attempts to protect data? Well, the cloud was born in a public space so consequently has security baked into every layer of its design from the get-go:

This is what encrypted data looks like without the key. It’s harder to see the woman in the red dress.

When set up properly, cloud encrypts data at rest (i.e. when it’s stored somewhere) and in flight (i.e. when it’s moving around). AWS for example offers digital envelope encryption and complex rotating key management. Translated to English, this is like a safe where the code changes every minute. I’m simplifying but essentially just stealing the data isn’t enough to get you very far — you have to do an unreasonable amount of work to read it because the math makes A Beautiful Mind look like he was just typing “Hello” upside-down on a calculator.

Amazon’s Snowball lets you ship corporate data from your armed guards direct to their data centers using UPS. So hijackers could presumably hit the UPS truck and steal all your corporate data, right? Unfortunately not — the encryption’s so tight that even if you have access to the hard disks with the data, you’ll still need a few hundred years to figure out the contents because of the method used.

Access controls and auditing are granular and very robust. Since most hackers are actually disgruntled employees on the way out of the building (or well-meaning workers accidentally doing damage), a well-designed set of policies will prevent 99% of all typical data loss events. And recovering from snapshots in the cloud is elegantly simple.

Major cloud providers have a slew of secrets, proprietary tools, potions and tricks up their sleeves to catch bad guys before you even know about it. Since you’re already in the secure area of their environment, you benefit from the multiple levels of threat detection they use non-stop. It’s like having an invisible Secret Service watching your back all the time.

Encryption and hacking aside, much corporate data loss happens because backups fail or, more likely, were never made in the first place. Automation in the cloud makes it much easier to create policies where every byte of data is held somewhere forever and you don’t have a server farm that somehow got forgotten when the network guy was on vacation in Hawaii.

What about Google and Amazon reading your data?

That’s what you really want to know about, right? There are rumors that Jeff Bezos and Larry Page get together at the weekends, laughing at their customer’s funniest emails and selling their corporate secrets to Russian mercenaries. They really only invented cloud services just to lure you into sharing your secrets with them.

Yeah, none of that is even remotely true and they have built billion dollars clouds precisely because they don’t do this. If this sounds nuts, let me add this — one Chief Operating Officer I met at a very large retail company told me that he would never, ever allow cloud in his business because Google and Amazon would steal all their point of sale transaction data and learn about their margins. Okaaay…

Security is the number one priority for all cloud platforms. They are all very, very secure.

But really, is my data safe?

Alright, here are some random thoughts to make you feel a bit safer:

Files stored in AWS are really held on multiple seal-healing hard disks which means they survive natural failure. This makes durability so impressive (99.999999999% — 11 9s, count ‘em!) that for 10,000 files stored, you would expect to lose a single file every 10 million years. If that’s not good enough, you can automate replication to other regions or other cloud providers and get so close to 100% that Extinction Level Events on a planetary level will be your biggest worry.

Encryption is a complex subject but in many of the key management systems, if you lose your own keys, nobody can read the data — not you, me, Amazon, Google or the NSA. There is no backdoor. Your key was the only way in.

The US government stores a ton of sensitive data in AWS (GovCloud) so Jeff Bezos risks the wrath of people trained in waterboarding if the security isn’t great. I’d hazard a guess that plenty of foreign governments have thrown their best minds into breaking in.

Often, we’re just trying to guard against stupidity

Finally, in my twenty glorious years in this industry, security failures are usually typified not by Homeland-style hacking squads bent on stealing your information, but the mundane stupid things that happen.

We once lost a team’s entire codebase because the lead developer kept it on his laptop and never checked it into source control — that was expensive.

A helpful intern once ‘cleaned up’ the shared drive at a company and wiped out all their marketing collateral for the last five years.

A client’s office kept their triply-backed up files all in the same building and it was washed away by floods.

And a receptionist installed viruses on an entire network by plugging in a USB stick to help out a sales rep off the street. He said just wanted to print a file.

Cloud providers give you the best processes, tools and practices to truly beef up your security game and, with the correct configuration, become world-class. Nothing in the on-premise world even comes close.

Nothing is Safer than Cloud was originally published in A Cloud Guru on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

from A Cloud Guru - Medium http://ift.tt/2o6XmZl