#probably my last cicada meme for the summer so I hope you enjoy

[great-and-small]

[dappercapricorn]

Summer Camp’s For Losers

Hiya @mellifluous-cicadas, I’m your secret valentine~ This was turning out longer than expected, but here’s the first part of the story for ya. Since you originally said you enjoy meme redraws and the like (which I could not provide due to being too ill and moving to put a good effort in), I tried to aim for a story of the more wacky and humorous type. I hope you enjoy~ I don’t know how far I’ll eventually take this (I’m enjoy the idea I got going), but the other parts will be posted here as they come (as I don’t have an AO3). On to the story~

“Let me get this straight. You want me to tag along with you on some far fetched road trip to search for cryptids that you want to try and videotape for your weird vlog?”

“That would be correct.”

“And you’re not sure how long this will take?”

“Nope.”

Lance hesitated, shuffling his weight from foot to foot. “I dunno Keith, I was supposed to start job searching since I decided not to jump right into college.” The other male standing in front of him on his porch looked up with a pout. “You know better than to pull those dog eyes on me.”

“Please! You’re always complaining about the lack of adventure in your life. Besides, I’m not going to college yet either and we have the whole summer ahead of us! This is the first real chance I have at proving these creatures are real other than the piss poor efforts of setting up night cameras in my yard I have.”

With a sigh, Lance relented and stepped back into his home to pack a bag. “You’re lucky I like you or I would’ve shut the door on you by now like a group of persistent Jehovah's Witnesses.” Despite these words, a soft smile spread across his face as he shook his head. Twenty minutes later, a large backpack in hand, Lance scrawled a quick note to his family to leave on the fridge before he walked out the door to join Keith in his car. “Oi, since when did Shiro let you drive his Mazda?”

Keith poked his head out of the driver’s window to look back at him. “What? He actually gave it to me for a grad present. Besides, Allura made him get one of those soccer mom vans.”

“Pfffft, oh man, really? That’s freaking hilarious.” Lance laughed as he hopped into the front seat. “So mister ‘I’d totally marry mothman’, do we even have a plan?”

“Nope! The three of us shall be hitting up whatever environment along the way that holds high potential for cryptid sightings before moving from there.” Pidge piped up from their spot. They were typing away at a laptop in the back seat behind Keith.

“Holy shit, were you always back there?” Lance jumped, hitting his head on the ceiling in the process. With a hiss he rubbed his head and glared back at them. “Hey, shouldn’t you be back at home? Don’t you have like, summer homework to do or some nerd camp to attend or something?”

“Hah, camp’s for losers and homework’s never been a problem.”

“Does your mother know where you’re going?” Lance looked over to Keith. “DOES SHIRO KNOW ABOUT THIS WILD PLAN OF YOURS?”

“What they don’t know won’t hurt ‘em.” Both chimed in unison as Keith started the car and pulled out onto the road to begin their journey out of town. Lance sweatdropped as he gave in and leaned back into his seat. He might as well get comfortable for the long ride ahead of them.

In the livingroom of Keith’s home, Shiro sat beside Allura on the couch. He scanned through the daily paper while she watched a documentary on space travel. “Do you know where Keith went off to? I saw him haul a duffle bag into his car and speed off down the road.” He asked, glancing up over the top of the paper.

“Hm?” Allura looked up from the television. “Oh yeah, he said Pidge was attending a summer long science camp of sorts and he was attending as a counselor for community service experience and to act as a sort of chaperone for them I guess.”

“Is that so? Hmm.” Shiro returned to reading an article about nearby UFO sightings and missing goats.

A mixed playlist of bands like My Chemical Romance and Green Day filled the car as Keith drove off towards the Eastern coast of the country. “Well, do you at least know what cryptids or specific habitats you wanna hit up or whatever?” Lance questioned a couple hours into their trip. “Don’t tell me we’re just driving until it’s either time to rest up or you spot something worth checking out.”

“Well...It’s kinda both?” Keith shrugged, keeping his eyes on the road.

“You see Lance, we have a general idea of what we’d like to showcase on our vlog. It’s kinda hard to get much when you live in a desert town, so that’s why we’re branching out, if you will. I guess we’ll be doing a loop through the country of sorts that will eventually lead back home. Our first group of sneaky critters are the ones found along the Eastern states, like Keith’s husbando mothman, the Jersey Devil, and big foot just to name a few. So we’ll be looking for forested areas for starters along with checking out the towns and cities that have more frequent sightings.”

“I see...Well that’s something I guess.” Lance rolled his eyes. Soon his stomach rumbled loud enough to be audible by others. He pointed out a sign for an upcoming rest stop. “Hey, unless you moth brains thought enough to pack a starting supply of food, we should stop to eat. Then probably stock up on stuff to keep us going for a while.”

Keith was hesitant, but Pidge agreed with Lance. “Shit, he’s right. We actually only have random bags of junk food stashed around the car. There is plenty of bottled water, but I don’t think any of us will be too happy trudging through the woods with only chips and twizzlers to fuel us.” With a sigh he pulled into the rest stop as soon as its exit sign popped up before them.

A light drizzle greeted them as they parked and stepped out of the car. “Hurry up guys before we get soaked! We can waste time after eating and buy some of our stuff here.” Lance called back as he used his jacket as a makeshift umbrella. The trio scurried into the building. Only a few other people were milling about at the time. “Ah, much better.” Lance shook out the water from his hair and readjusted his jacket. “Sooo, what do you guys wanna get? There aren’t too many restaurants to choose from.” He asked while eyeing the dismal variety at the food court.

“Let’s share a pizza I guess?”

“I’m not riding in the same car as you if you’re gonna ingest any sort of dairy.” Pidge side eyed Keith and shook their head. “Let’s just pick out our own things and find a table to gather at.” After agreeing upon one of the numerous empty tables to meet at, they each lined up at whatever place sounded appetizing. Pidge and Keith chatted about their favorite cryptids while Lance watched on while drinking his milkshake and shoveling fries into his mouth. Aside from the handful of disgruntled staff, no one was really around to pay them mind anyway.

The rain continued to fall after they’ve eaten. Wanting to stay dry a bit longer, they decided to hunt down what they could for supplies. Lance spotted a non branded general store of sorts that was similar to a CVS or Walgreen's. “This’ll have to do until we stumble across actual stores later on.” As the light storm continued, they took their time wandering each ilse and filling up the small plastic cart Lance pushed ahead of him. They stocked up on easy to eat/prep foods like bread, tab open cans of fruit, beans, and soup, jerky, peanut butter, granola bars, a couple packs of toilet paper, and some first aid supplies. Between Keith and Lance’s grad present money and Pidge’s stash from their tech repair side business, the three had more than enough to last through the trip. Well, they had hoped so at least. Keith had Shiro’s emergency credit card stowed away in case they ran out and could get home.

By time they began carrying their bags to the car, the rain died down to a light misting. Keith unlocked the car and opened the back hatch so they could store their supplies. As Lance set his load down he spotted a black plastic case secured to the floor. “Uh Keith, what’s in there?” He inquired out of curiosity.

“Oh, just my knife collection. I figured it might come in handy not only for general use, but hey, we may need to defend ourselves at some point.” Keith replied in a nonchalant tone while opening the case to show off his assortment of blades. “Do you want one to keep on your person?”

“Er, I’ll pass for now. Besides I do have a pocket knife on me. It’ll suffice until we get into the thick of things I suppose.”

“Whatever, suit yourself.” With a shrug Keith hopped back in and waited for the others before he began driving once more.

Pidge spoke up a couple minutes in after having skimmed over something on their computer. “Hey, since we still have a long distance between our current location and the group of creatures we want to investigate first, how about we check out something a bit closer beforehand? There’s the Honey Island swamp monster in Louisiana and then big foot’s stinky cousin, the skunk ape down in the Everglades of Florida. Do either of those sound good to you?”

Keith pondered this for a moment. “Nah, I’d rather not. Both are in swamplands and marshes that I really have no intentions of wading through. I’d also rather skip the croc infested Everglades and just head straight for the New England forests to look for bigfoot himself.”

“Well, I guess you have a point there.” Pidge nodded and looked back to their screen. “So, then where are we headed to first?”

“West Virginia to meet up with my boi mothman.” Keith grinned and pulled back onto the highway. Lance let out a groan and rolled his eyes. This was going to be a long summer.

With no other intended stops the group began the long drive to West Virginia. Lance and Keith took shifts driving and Pidge spewed out random trivia about either their current location or a random cryptid to keep things lively. As three am rolled around, they were all grumpy and tired. Not wanting to risk sleep deprived accidents, they stopped at a shady looking motel to sleep before hitting the road again at ten. Despite Lance’s worry they did not, in fact, get murdered in their sleep by some crazy hillbillies to be either eaten or sold to the black market.  By two they drove across the state border and Keith directed the car towards his intended location.

“Before we set up somewhere there’s someplace I wanna check out first.”

“What, a mothman exhibit or something?” Lance asked, eyes skimming over the passing scenery with a bored expression.

“Why yes, actually.” Pidge poked their head in between the seats. “We’re way too early for the festival as it’s held in September, but not only does Point Pleasant have the origin location and most sightings, there’s a museum dedicated to them.”

Lance dragged a hand down his face. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Well let’s go see this oddball museum I suppose. ‘Cause I can only assume we’ll be camping or something in the near future.”

After looking up the museum’s location via Google, Pidge directed them towards its location. As they pulled into an empty parking space, Lance’s phone buzzed with a call. Seeing as it was Hunk, he answered while they all exited the vehicle and walked towards the entrance. “Yo, this is Lance. What’s up buddy?”

“Oh thank God, you picked up on the first try. I was worried about you. Where are you? I heard Pidge and Keith are at a summer camp or something, but when I went to your house to hang out, you were nowhere to be seen. Your parents said you went on a road trip to tour colleges with Keith. Things just don’t add up, yo. This is all freakin fishy and I just wanted to at least make sure you were alright.”

“Well, uh you see Hunk...Keith pretty much dragged me along to travel the country in search of elusive creatures to potentially film with Pidge tagging along as well.”

“Wait, WHAT?”

“Don’t tell Shiro or my folks. Love ya. Bye.” Lance spewed out before hanging up and redirecting his attention to the building in front of him. Getting questioning looks from the others he just waved it off. “Oh that was just Hunk being a worry wort. Don’t pay him any mind.” With that he lead the way inside and to the admission desk. Once the tickets were acquired they set off to explore the small exhibit.

For such a small subject matter, there was enough content to occupy nearly three hours of their time. Although, they had to practically pry Keith from each section once it was time to move to the next. Lance was actually impressed. There were various sculptures of each rendition of mothman with a small plaque describing who first encountered it along with its origin location. A side room contained the museum’s collection of photographs along with footage playing on loops on the wall mounted televisions. It even had a gift shop and of course they just had to stop there before they left. Keith and Pidge both got t-shirts and pitched in to get one of the large plush versions to prop up in the empty back seat behind Lance.

Back on the road Keith steered the card towards the forested part of town. “So, our first actual stop will be the Ordnance Works, or more fondly known by locals as the ‘TNT area’ because of what was stored there. There are several concrete domes scattered about. Which is where they stored gunpowder or something? I dunno, but each one has a small clearing and I heard there’s even secret tunnels. Although most are sealed away or inaccessible due to water and other things.” Pidge debriefed them as they read off from the long set of notes stored on their computer.

“Don’t worry. We’ll just be setting up camp in one of the clearings with some cameras to monitor the area. After we get set up, we’re gonna do a little hiking in the surrounding woods with our handhelds to look for any evidence they live in the area or to capture any odd encounters we have before retiring to our tent for the night.” Keith spoke before Lance could protest. “Whether we find anything or not, we’ll also spend another night in the actual town just ‘staking out’ areas to see if we can experience any sightings there.”

“Sounds like a grand ol’ time. Hopefully we won’t have to put that knife collection of yours to use so soon into our trip.”

“It’ll be fine Lance.” Keith gave him a faint smile before turning onto a dirt road hidden among the tree line. “It’s supposedly a short drive from here. We’re gonna set up at one of the middle section ones so that we’re well into the forest, but not deep enough to wind up utterly lost.” He explained as they traveled further down the road. It only grew rougher and more narrow from there. Eventually Keith pulled over in a small alcove like clearing as the car could not travel any farther. Their destined camp site was well within walking distance anyway. “Come on guys, it’s a little after six and we’re losing daylight. We’ll have to hustle if we want to be done setting up in time to wander the area with some sorta light before having to switch to flashlights.”

Once parked they hopped out and grabbed their bags from the back. Lance carried the tent while Pidge followed behind with the other supplies in hand.  Keith led the way, various cameras stowed away in a few different bags. Six minutes later the path branched off and they headed left where it soon ended and opened up to a grassy clearing. Situated smack in the middle was a domed, concrete wall with a sealed off entrance.  “Here we go. Come on guys, let’s get the tent and cameras set up so we can head out. We have little time before the sun fully sets.” Pidge assisted Lance with the tent while Keith set up three cameras to post at even intervals around their campsite. They finished around seven. The sun was already well on its way below the horizon. Keith and Pidge each carried a handheld recorder while Lance brought along a large flashlight.

“So do ya have any specific plans, Keith?” Lance asked as he brought up the rear of their line with Pidge between them.

“We’ll walk out a short way from camp and wander the surrounding circumference of the area. We should be able to cover a decent amount of ground and still manage to find our way back. Pidge does have some high-tech GPS stuff on ‘em in case we run into trouble.”  Keith replied with a glance over his shoulder. “Now let’s start huntin’. Hopefully we don’t run into any security patrols or anything. I did hear they’ve turned this general area into a wildlife preserve or something of that nature.”

As they began, Keith turned his camera towards himself to address whatever small group of followers he had for his vlog. “Yo, Keith here and welcome to another episode of ‘Cryptid Catchers’. Today begins my summer long journey through the states in search of our beloved hidden creatures. I’m joined with my fellow fan Pidge and boyfriend Lance who willingly tagged along to help us out.” He stopped to pan over them before continuing. “We’re currently in the woodlands of Point Pleasant, West Virginia where the mothman legend began. More importantly, we’re actually hiking through the Ordinance Works area of the town where the very first sighting occurred. Before retiring for the night, we’ve set off to scout the nearby area for any signs of this elusive creature. Let’s see what we can uncover, folks.”

After the brief intro, Keith turned the camera forward once more and continued down their current path. Lance kept a watchful gaze of their surroundings, keeping an eye out for any security patrols, potential threats, or even any pair of illuminated eyes from the underbrush. He could only hope this went over well and that if there really was a mothman out there, they wouldn’t devour them for a late night snack.