#pretty sure like 90% of my mutuals were already tagged so do it if you wish--

[bleachbleachbleach]

2022/2023 Fandom Goals!

At the end of last year I set out to accomplish what then appeared to be achievable fandom goals for 2022. 

WERE THEY, THOUGH. WERE THEY. 

Let’s see:

2022 Goals (Review)

1. be more shameless on Tumblr - I’m pretty sure I’ve gotten at least a little better about this, though I guess it depends on the day. Posting things on the Internet causes me anguish, and I consider doing so an intentional conditioning process. All the same, I would still like to feel less anguish. But I also don’t want to be actively annoying or boring and simply be *unanguished* about it, LOL, and therein lies my hangup.

2. stop damning reblogs to Draft Purgatory - I have been very good about this this year! Browser tabs purgatory, on the other hand…

3. prioritize accessible joy - This one was about not abandoning Tumblr for months at a time, and I feel like I’ve actually improved here and merely abandoning Tumblr for 1-2 weeks at a time. One thing that was way more helpful than it had any business being was making a special "mini dash" that just has blogs that primarily post original Bleach content and/or mutuals who are friends, so that if I get overwhelmed I can jump ship and use that dash for a while instead, and still get to see a lot of my favorite things. I say this like my normal dash isn’t mostly Bleach and like I follow a zillion active blogs. I do not. That’s why it’s ridiculous that my mini dash is as great for me as it is. XD 

4. finish reading the Soul Society arc - I am on… Chapter 68 LOL, and Ichigo has not yet so much as entered Soul Society. Making progress on this re-read is challenging because there are a lot of ways to enjoy Bleach and this reread is the only one that’s not a moving target—the manga’s not going anywhere; I’m not going to 'fall behind' if I don’t read it—and I have a regrettably limited amount of Bleach time. But I think I’ve become more confident in my reading/ability to search stackexchange and read about grammar, so I am still enjoying this!

5. write my fanfic - I wish I had done more of this, but this was a Year—a huge number of moving pieces IRL. I think last year I had written like… 10k of this fanfic? And now I have probably 20-30k, and most of that original 10k got scrapped. This fic has done a lot of shape-taking this year, which is very good. I had these grand plans of finishing two full chapters (Akon and Matsumoto 5) by the end of the year, which I have modified to finishing one chapter. I have *one scene left* but I think it’s probably in the Top 5 of Scenes in This Fic That I Already Know Are Going to be Hard to Write, and I’ve already written and deleted it once. There were so many bugs in the deleted version, so many bugs for absolutely no reason. I don’t know what the scene will ultimately look like, but I can assure you you’d never guess what scene used to Have Bugs, because there is so little reason there should have been bugs.

2023 Goals

1. Write my fanfic! For the sake of SMART goals, let’s say at least 1 line per day, every single day. Come March I will have been writing this for two years and WHAT do I have to show for it.

2. No more tabs purgatory! I don’t know how obvious B3’s posting habits are to others—but for my part of the equation, I tend to be That Person who reblogs 15 long textposts and adds 90 tags to everything, all the span of the same 2-hour block. I don’t think this is actually a good way of using Tumblr and I’d prefer to… not do that. XP And to find ways of being more with the flow of the dash. 

This is mostly me needing to carve out better interstitial space for fun time, because I want this for my own pleasure and I also because I want the OP to know how VERY EXCITED I AM TO SEE IT and tabs purgatory feels like the opposite of being able to do that. SMART goal? Uhhh don’t let tabs languish for more than a week?

3. Make space for fandom, and for fandom things that give me most joy. Again, this is part of a broader life assessment that in a better world would boil down to "working less" but in this world is not accessible if I want to continue being employed. So I’ll settle for being extremely intentional about how I spend my free time, and by consciously thinking about ways to create the kinds of interactions I most enjoy. That sounds very cerebral but I promise I just mean things like "that meme where I asked people to send in random stuff they loved about their Bleach faves was super fun I should do that again sometime" and "try to make friends" and "talk about fanfic with people” and “make progress on that bleach reread occasionally.”

4. Be more shameless on Tumblr. YEAH I have no strategies here, but I’m gonna keep this one on the list.

[findstenicht]

15 questions for 5 mutuals

Rule: You have to answer truthfully and you have to tag 5 mutuals in your post.

I was tagged by @apoloniaspiegelgold, thank you!! <3

1. Are you named after anyone?

nope! although my dad used to claim that i was named after some slavic actress/model/wife-of-Some-Guy whose name i always forget

2. When was the last time you cried? Why?

the weekend before the last, just your average sunday afternoon mental breakdown

3. Do you believe in Soulmates? 

sort of, but also not really? i do believe that there are certain people who are supposed to be in your life at certain times but that doesnt necessarily mean "forever"

4. Do you drink liquor? 

rarely - im not opposed to it, i just dont often do things where there's alcohol involved

5. What do you usually daydream about?

listen. i have a very specific daydream universe that i always come back to but. you know how you sometimes read a story and can pretty much guess what's wrong with the author? describing my daydreams would be like that except you wouldnt have to guess at all, it'd be the most on-the-nose thing you've ever seen. might as well just post a list of everything that ever went wrong in my life and it'd be less embarrassing

6. First thing you notice about other people?

their voice!! (i mean obviously lots of times you see people before you hear them, but i dont really notice anything more specific than a general impression about appearances at first glance, yk?)

7. What's your favorite quote from a TV show/movie/book?

does a poem count? cause the only thing i can think of is "Es gibt keine Schuld. Es gibt nur den Ablauf der Zeit." from tucholsky's poem aus, which i havent stopped thinking about since i read it nine years ago (and for which i still havent found an english translation, sorry!)

8. Some of your pet peeves?

absolutely hate when people overexplain stuff to me that i know, that you could reasonably assume i know, and that i've told you i know. i know a lot of times people mean well (which is why i wont get actively mad at anyone), but if i already told you i know about something, you really dont have to explain it to me like it's brand new information. (looking at all the guys who heard about my field of study and then went on to describe the most basic sociological concepts to me)

9. Where’s the next place on your travel bucket list and why?

ireland!! i have no specific plans but i've wanted to go to ireland ever since i was a kid and saw the photos my parents took on their trip to ireland in the 90s

10. Where were you born? 

in a small town in northern germany :)

11. What are your hobbies?

nothing exciting tbh - video games, talking to friends, going for walks, and writing (<- i say, barely having written anything in months)

12. What's the best joke you've ever heard?

bold of you to assume i can remember jokes

13. What’s your love language? 

words of affirmation all the way - if i love you in any way, you will hear about it. thats both a threat and a promise.

14. Topics you never get tired of to talk about.

dragon age, what i'd vaguely describe as online media literacy, and social movements (especially far right movements, which i know sounds weird, but for some reason the FR became my main academic interest)

15. What would be the title if your life were a movie? 

not sure if it'd actually fit, but a couple years ago i scribbled down the phrase "the grand stupidity of the general state of things" and ive just been waiting to use that as a title for anything ever since; so yeah sure, why not, title for a movie about my life!

also im gonna cheat here and only tag @78669 (only if you want to ofc!!) bc i love my mutuals but never talk to them and i dont want to annoy them :( (obviously everyone feel free to just consider themselves tagged, if you want to do this!)

[this-machine-runs-on-coffee]

I like how low I can sing, even though I don't know which note it is, but I do consider it to be pretty low

I like how high I can sing, even though that only happens sometimes and I again do not know the note for it but I'm pretty sure it's not that high

I like my ability to at times recognise details people often don't see

I like my ability to do 5th grade level problems pretty fast and to know what is the result of the numbers 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12-13-14-15 squared (1-4-9-16-25-36-49-64-81-100-121-144-169-196-225) (I know it's easy to do but I'm still proud of it)

I like how most times I can guess who the murderer/culprit is going to be from the beginning when we first see them (I'm not fun to be around when seeing/reading crime movies/books, I just have a feeling it's them, call it pattern recognition or something but they all do that thing that makes you say "Hmm... Yup, culprit. Suspicious behavior very well masked as normal. You are the culprit!" the shots really do help. Some are very incriminatory at times. Like, the investigation has ended and all the suspects/characters are there in the scene and as the detective's walking in to say who the culprit is and character X is at the center of the characters minus detective shot? Character X is going to be the center of that scene, the protagonist of that scene [I was taught this at school, I'll admit that with no shame. They made us learn the basics of how to make a good video/short movie/long movie. Which shots were which, the ones which worked well and when, they made us slightly analyse some Hitchcock's movie scenes, every detail's important and useful, the backgrounds are important because at times they serve to give hints about what's going to happen or a certain character's personality, why make them balanced or unbalanced to express what, the music has to be chosen perfectly or it's not gonna fit very well, ecc. ecc. ... Well, I didn't really put that to work, but I was told I'm pretty good at editing last year]. They're likely the culprit. Or it's just a random feeling I get. 90% of the time I'm right. I only remember three times being wrong and recently but then again my memory does suck, so)

THANK YOU FOR THE TAG I'm going to tag all my mutuals (except you since you've already done it) because yes @radio-silence-fan, @shinycharriot0, @pessimistic-gh0st, @ribcage-confessions, @ronnica-sinp, @chandlerschainsaw, @officialhusker, @floripare, @freezeyyourbrain, @arachnid-fool, @villain-life, @justalittlerandomartist, @cher-takes-the-l, @nayrzz, @lilythefirst819x, @juicylipsperson

When you get this you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)❤️

@helluvabossfan08 @lemonlightt @coraldeermoon @inky-void

@123letsgobestie @almaprincess66 @lavenderfairiez @helpallthenamesaretakenblog and all my other lovely moots!!

When I get obsessed with something I basically become an encyclopaedia for it and can relate anything back to it with incredible skill (“Oh Oedipus? That’s referenced in S1 Ep9 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, titled “Puppet Show”- the only episode of the show to contain a during-credits scene. The show, created by the now infamous Jos Wheadon ran between 1997 and 2003, for a total of 7 seasons and 144 episodes, each one averaging at around 45mins. The 100th episode of the show- S5 Ep22, “The Gift”- was initially intended to be the season finale, but interestingly it was recalled for two more- hey! Guys! Come back, don’t leave!! I’m not done!!!”)

In a similar vain, I have every lyric to Hamilton memorised. Don’t believe me, I’ll prove it to you- do you have three hours to spare? I have in fact performed one-woman productions of the show to my friends and family, complete with sweet extra content (deleted songs, historical fun facts, a detective-style board with red string and everything proving Why They Are Gay).

I like to think I’m pretty talented- I can sing, I play two instruments (Piano and Bass), I know my way around D.A.Ws and other sound equipment, I can draw, I can write, I can compose- but I am in no way a prodigy in these fields and there’s always room for improvement.

I’m quite truthful- I never lie, EVER. I’m also open and honest about everything (sometimes at a risk of my own self-preservation). I don’t get embarrassed easily and I come across as quite confident.

People tell me I’m smart- I have a tendency to not shy away from long, technical words. I talk a lot, and can get really stuck into a discussion if I’m interested (Although, my Received Pronunciation accent and my good grammar in texts might also play a factor).

[splattales]

Fifteen Questions. Fifteen Mutuals.

Repost, don’t reblog!

(HEY DID Y’ALL KNOW I HAVE LIKE 1,000 MUSES? I’LL DO THEM ALL. HERE’S A READMORE FOR YOU. SORRY MOBILE USERS)

1. Are you named after anyone? 

Molly: Sorry, nah. Can’t really ask anyone though.

Finn: I believe my first name is my grandfather’s middle name. Dad’s side. 

Marina: Maybe? I think I was named after a historical figure, but it’s, like, a really popular name anyway...

Brine: Nope! Just salty water.

Pansy: I’m named after a flower. It’s a tradition in my fam’bly to name your first-hatched after a flower...

Ribbon:  Momma’s a Ribbon Eel!

Slushie named himself -- though technically, he’s named after a beverage.

Tay: Yes! Many rulers in my bloodline were also named ‘Octavio’. 

Sabi: It’s shortened from ‘Wasabi’. Not very creative, I know, but ... I’ve had a few names. This is just the one I’ve gotten used to. 

-

2. When was the last time you cried? 

Molly: Nunya bizness. (About three days ago.)

Finn: I’m actually quite happy at the moment! Maybe two weeks?

Marina: I don’t ever cry, duh. (Last week after spilling her meal on the floor.)

Brine: Yesterday! Don’t worry, it was just a touchy subject that came up. Always cry when you need to, it can really help.

Pansy: Haven’t in a fair bit, I think I cried on Groa the other day about somethin’ real dumb. One of my workmates left n’ I burnt dinner n’ then something else happened and just… well, I sure hope he doesn’t think I’m weird ‘cause of that, eheh.

Ribbon: It was my birthday recently, so I haven’t felt like crying! I dunno.

Slushie cried the last time he ate a memcake, so two days ago.

Tay: That isn’t any of your business. (Ten minutes ago.)

Sabi: Sometimes I cry when I’m listening to sad music, so, um… Tuesday?

-

3. Do you have kids?

Molly: No! Adopting might be cool when I’m older, but I’m only 19 and I have way too much to deal with already!

Finn: Do I look like a father? I’m still in uni! … That said, a few of my classmates have kids, it’s really strange.

Marina: No, but I have younger siblings, so I know how to take care of ‘em. … I don’t think I’m gonna want kids for a while, if ever.

Brine: Haha! No! Maybe someday.

Pansy: Slushie’s my kid! He’s adopted, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t family. I hope he knows that.

Ribbon:  You’re funny! Sometimes I pretend my dinosaur toys are babies, and then we destroy the town as a powerful army.

Slushie is 15 years old!

Tay: I think Reed could be considered my ‘child’, but I’m still not altogether sure about that. And Masako, I think? But I never had any children in this timeline, so it’s a little confusing…

Sabi: No, no, I don’t think I’d make a good father…

-

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? 

Molly: Here and there. I don’t like to overdo it, but it’s totally justified sometimes.

Finn: Yeah … my friends aren’t exactly a good influence.

Marina: All the time. I don’t think I could live without it.

Brine: Hardly! It wouldn’t be good if I sassed my superiors, and it’s mean. But a harmless eyeroll won’t hurt, on occasion.

Pansy: Eh, sometimes. I’m not really smart enough, I get out-sarcasm’d, and it ain’t the nicest thing.

Ribbon:  Doing a sarcasm can be pretty hard… you get told off, too.

Slushie doesn’t talk enough to use sarcasm, but his body language often suggests it!

Tay: Oh no, I neeeever use sarcasm…

Sabi: …It isn’t kind to be sarcastic.

-

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? 

Molly: Their face. Some people have real distinguishin’ features.

Finn: Their ink colour! If they don’t have one, then I look at their style instead.

Marina: Uh, does it matter? It depends on the person, right? I usually notice if somebody’s an Octoling.

Brine: Usually? Their handshake. I know that’s kind of weird to say, but the way someone shakes your hand can tell you a bit about them.

Pansy: I try to look at how they carry themselves n’ the expressions they make. It helps you figure out what a person’s like – though how they talk and what they do’s the next important thing. S’ important to watch the eyes.

Ribbon: If they’re smiling!

Slushie pays very close attention to the way other people talk.

Tay: How they behave towards me! Respect can be the difference between a guest staying or being thrown out – and potentially a matter of life and death when assassins are concerned!

Sabi: How much of a threat they are to me, haha… I try to keep my head down.

-

6. What’s your eye colour? 

Molly: Kinda… teal green? Lighter?

Finn: Rose pink!

Marina: Green eyes, green sclera. Just once I want somebody to say I’ve got eyes like emeralds, but I don’t see it happening. Nobody’s that suave, and I’d probably slap a stranger if they did.

Brine: Ocean blue!

Pansy: Deep pink. Cute, right? Haha, that was a joke…

Ribbon:  Pink like dad’s!

Slushie’s eyes are purple, with a white sclera.

Tay: Soft blue on green~

Sabi: Blue – and um, I’m the kind of octoling that has green ‘whites’.

-

7. Scary movie or happy ending? 

Molly: I like scary movies, they’re usually not that scary, haha. Happy endings make me think of those sappy films, but I don’t mind them in like … regular stuff.

Finn: I love happy endings! Especially in a romance film. Scary movies aren’t so bad, but some of them I’d prefer not to see…

Marina: Horror. Happy endings can be way too saccharine for my tastes.

Brine: I do love a good happy ending!

Pansy: Yeah, happy endings here too. I don’t mind horror so much if things work out in the end, though. What’s the point if everyone dies?

Ribbon:  No scary films please!!!

Slushie isn’t a fan of scary films. He’d much rather watch something happy.

Tay: It depends on my mood. I like a happy ending, but it has to be written well, and scary films – well, I’m not scared of anything, but too much of it taints the mind, you know…

Sabi: Please . . . take one look at me and say I’d enjoy a horror film. You’d be wrong in every way…

-

8. Any special talents? 

Molly: People keep saying my cooking’s good, but I don’t really see it? I know lots ‘bout weapons…

Finn: Art! I’m trying to make a career out of it.

Marina: I’m pretty good at mending up old human tech, and I can program. Real dab-hand at fixing technology. Betcha didn’t know that.

Brine: I’ve got a good eye! … Yup, that’s all I can think of, ahah.

Pansy: Me? Er, I guess I can cook pies pretty good. I used to be decent at all that detective stuff too, but now I’m not so sure.

Ribbon:  I dunno what my special talent is yet! I’m hoping it’s to do with detecting.

Slushie is very good at puzzle solving, and has quick reflexes. He’s also an absolute STAR at learning languages.

Tay: I have so many talents! Always looking good is practically a talent, and there’s my overall intelligence – I’m especially good at mathematics – but I’m a creative mind too! I’m PERFECT at stage performance and mixing music, not to mention I’m excellent at tinkering with machinery, I’ve built plenty of things and […etc.]

Sabi: Oh, um, I’m pretty good when it comes to music, I guess…

-

9. Where were you born? 

Molly:  Small town just outside of Inkopolis, but basically Inkopolis.

Finn: I think my parents moved to Inkopolis around the time I was hatching? Yeah.

Marina: Octopolis. You know, underground.

Brine: Inkopolis, hatched and raised. (This is a retcon--)

Pansy: Cuttledown, it’s a little village right near Calamari County.

Ribbon:  Here! Inkopolis!

Slushie doesn’t know when or where he hatched, but he was quickly picked up by the underground orphanage.

Tay: Oh, somewhere on the surface a very long time ago… (Actually, that isn’t true.)

Sabi: In a lab somewhere underground. It’s, uhm, not very glamorous.

-

10. What are your hobbies? 

Molly: Turf War! I listen to music a bunch too, n’ play games.

Finn: When I’m not doing art, I like to play Turf War and hang out with my friends.

Marina: *gestures to her room full of human artefacts and study notes*

Brine: I don’t have a lot of time for hobbies, aha… sometimes I still make coffee…? I like stargazing and laughing at conspiracy theories.

Pansy: I garden a lot, but that’s also my job now.

Ribbon: I play videogames and draw and use my imagination and collect dinosaurs.

Slushie is still trying to find his place on the surface, so is trying a lot of new things.

Tay: Tinkering! I get excited about circuits and wires. Surprising, no?

Sabi: I really… REALLY invest a lot of my time into music. But I, um, I also like to read. Mostly science fiction.

-

11. Do you have any pets?

 Molly: Nah. Banned. I leave too much to give ‘em attention anyway.

Finn: My little brother. … Okay uh, that was kind of a cruel joke, eheh. No.

Marina: Pets are cute, but I don’t have the time! Not to mention no space.

Brine: Haha, Mom would kill me.

Pansy: We used to have a nudibranch back at Ma’s but not anymore. Maybe I should get another…? They cost a whole lot, long-term.

Ribbon:  I reeaallly want an axolotl but dad and mom say no! It’s not fair. Dad used to live on a farm so he basically had EVERY PET.

Slushie lives with Pansy, so likewise has no pets.

Tay: Hm, no… perhaps I should invest in one for companionship. I’d pay someone else to feed and clean up after it, of course…

Sabi: Ah, that’s a lot more responsibility than I could handle…

-

12. What sports do you/have you played?

[Everyone says ‘Turf War’ in unison, except for Tay who says ‘Sword fighting’ and Slushie who says nothing].

-

13. How tall are you? 

Molly: *grumbles* 4’10”…

Finn: 5’4”, still waiting for that growth spurt.

Marina: 5’5”. I’d like to be taller.

Brine: 5’11”! Nothing more, nothing less.

Pansy: Not nearly tall enough. 5’7”. I’m the shortest of my siblings, and I’m the oldest, pffah.

Ribbon:  Small! (She’s exactly 4ft.)

Slushie is something like 5’2”, I haven’t written it down anywhere.

Tay: Tall enough! (He’s 5’6” and insecure about it.)

Sabi: Aaah… I’m 6’8”, how embarrassing… I’m thankful I’m not any taller.

-

14. Dream job? 

Molly: I sure as heck don’t know, my dude. Something where I could show off my knowledge about battling, I guess. A teacher?

Finn: An artist that gets paid!

Marina: I will become the world’s greatest archaeologist.

Brine: Almost there! I’d love to be a fully-fledged lawyer.

Pansy: … I already lost my dream job as a detective.

Ribbon:  A detective!! Or a secret agent!! Or… a mailperson!

Slushie doesn’t really know what he wants to do with his life yet.

Tay: What could be better than being an emperor and a DJ? … being an MC? A showhost? I could do that too.

Sabi: My music is already selling well, so I’m very happy.

-

15. Favourite subject in school? 

Molly: I hated school. Uh, I liked history sometimes, but I wasn’t great. Music? We used to mess around a lot…

Finn: Apart from the obvious ‘art’, I did enjoy literature too!

Marina: Human studies. As for the military side, I did always enjoy target practice.

Brine: Law! Since it’s a later subject, I also had fun in Social Studies and Inklish Language.

Pansy: Long time ago, uh… I remember bein’ pretty good at geography? I was awful at Inklish n’ Maths and that. Science was pretty good though.

Ribbon: Hm… I love all the subjects! Does snacktime count as a subject? We hardly get those anymore now we’re older.

Slushie likes foreign languages. He also excelled in agility training.

Tay: I’m not sure I remember exactly, but I do love mathematics.

Sabi: I technically never went to school, um…

Well, here’s the end!

Tagged by: @manysquidsandoctos

Tagging: meap

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

your tags on that izzy post are so correct, thank you

Thank you I have being correct disease 💖💖💖

For context to anyone reading this there was a post I reblogged about the toe scene from OFMD and I agreed with like 90% of the post so I left my quibble in the tags, but my main problem with it was that it characterized Izzy and Ed's relationship as mutually abusive. I disagree with this for a few reasons. Reason number one being that, and don't quote me on this I'm not a relationship councilor I defer to the sociologists on this one, I'm pretty sure that mutual abuse is not a thing. I don't mean any disrespect I'm not accusing the op of that post of this, we're talking about Blorbo from my shows so it's not that serious. But I've only ever seen mutual abuse talked about in the context of trying to paint an abuse victim to be as bad as their abuser. Usually toxic relationship is a much better descriptor when talking about a relationship where both parties are being mistreated.

The second reason I disagree with this characterization is more interesting to talk about because it actually pertains to Blorbo. This reason is that abuse is like bullying in that there's gotta be a pattern of it happening. One instance of a behavior that could be considered bullying is just harassment. One instance of manipulating an intimate partner is just manipulation. One instance of cutting off Izzy's toe is just physical assault. Make no mistake Izzy was physically assaulted, but he was not abused in the domestic violence sense of the word. Based on what we've seen of Ed and Izzy's relationship, all of the behaviors that could be evidence of abuse have either come from Izzy or had context to them that made them somewhat acceptable (i.e. the punch and the choke. I think we can all agree that when you live on a pirate ship there is a certain level of 'talk shit get hit' going on and both were more than provoked) all of Izzy's tactics are used to control Ed. All of Ed's tactics are used to get Izzy to stop trying to control Ed. Ed is reactive, his violent behaviors occur after Izzy has already inflicted violence against Ed, it's just that Izzy's violence isn't physical. I know there's room for interpretation, and no shade to the author of that post, but I feel like when people apply the word abuse to Ed's behavior towards Izzy, they're falling victim to some predisposition to take Izzy's side. I'll hear arguments for Izzy not being Ed's abuser, although I do tend to read him as abusing Ed, but the idea that Ed enacting violence against Izzy one time after being backed into a corner all season being evidence of abuse just doesn't hold water to me. I've heard all the Izzy camp arguments. They misunderstand the source material.

Anyway. Izzy made his bed Ed absolutely didn't. And I think that makes all the difference.

[thefanficmonster]

Let Them Talk

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female) ft. Sykkuno

Warnings: Swearing, Jealousy

Genre: Fluff, a bit of Angst

Summary: We can all agree Among Us is a fun game on its own but what makes it ten times better is playing it with the right company. Y/N could agree 100% Being a streamer herself, she loves playing with the streamer gang that includes her boyfriend and best friend. But, what happens when her boyfriend starts doubting her feelings for him due to her close relationship with her best friend.

Requested by @cheetoscat . Thank you so much for your request! Sorry it took so long to write, I hope the final product is worth the wait. Enjoy! Love, Vy ❤

Y/AU/N - Your Among Us Name

I settle in my gaming chair, adjusting my webcam one last time before joining the Among Us lobby with my friends. 

“Hi everyone!“ I say into the mic, a smile plastering itself on my face. Discord is a magical thing, man. It’s so easy to forget that the people you are talking to aren’t around you or within arm’s reach. You could be separated by miles and miles of land or - in our case - oceans as well. Distance becomes negligible when you hear your friends’ voices, their laughter; when you have a good time together despite being each behind a screen, often times alone.

Well, I’m one of those lucky ones that isn’t alone. No one knows that, though. Everyone thinks I’m a single, self-employed girl that’s straight out of college. And they are 90% right. Only thing is - I’m not single. That would be a shocker in and of itself, but revealing who’s changed my relationship status would be a bomb with a whole new intensity.

Speaking of my significant other who shall remain unnamed - just kidding, it’s Corpse - his form materializes in the doorway of my recording room. I give him a hand signal the camera isn’t able to capture, alerting him of the fact that my mic is on. He replies by blowing me a kiss and walking off down the hall to his recording room where he’ll be stationed for the next three or so hours.

I owe this relationship to my best friend Sykkuno. I’m a pretty new and not very well known on the platform, however, thanks to him I haven’t only obtained a boyfriend, but a following of a little over million subscribers as well. 

It all started with an invitation to fill a spot in the Among Us lobby him and his friends had created. It took him quite a bit to convince me to join, but I eventually caved and agreed. Suddenly, there I was. In a Discord call, in an Among Us lobby with some of the most well-known names on this platform. I’m talking YouTube legends. I was that puppy playing with the big dogs. The newbie tagging along with the big leagues. Or at least that’s how I felt until we all started vibing - talking and teasing each other as though we’ve known each other for years and not minutes.

When I joined the call, Corpse wasn’t present. After everyone else introduced themselves, Sykkuno informed me that we were waiting for Corpse to return. The name sounded really cool to me and I was genuinely very excited to meet this Corpse guy.

And then, out of the blue - no prep, no warning...

“Did you get someone to fill the spot? Oh- Hello, Y/AU/N.“ 

…he started talking and he had me star-struck. Apparently, he also had me a blabbering mess cause I remember blurting out: “Whoa, who’s this guy speaking in bold and underlined at the same time?”

The entire lobby, including Corpse, laughed. Sean, or Jack like they called him most often, answered my question, “That is the voice of God, Y/N. Its source is named Corpse, though.”

Heat spread from the bottom of my neck to the tips of my ears. I was mortified by my own stupidity. I was well aware they couldn’t see me and I was incredibly thankful for that, but I simply could not get myself to open my eyes. “I’m so sorry.” I said through nervous laughter.

“No, no, I like that description. Bold and underlined at the same time, huh?“ His voice sounded even more pleasant when it had that teasing, mischievous note to it. That thought popping up in my head only made things worse for my self-esteem and only made me more embarrassed, causing me to hide my face in my hands. “You sure it’s not in Italics as well?“ 

His question got a weak laugh out of me. “Nope, definitely not. Nothing Italic about it.“

Yes, I don’t even know how some terrible jokes about MS Word fonts got me as far as a romantic relationship, but they did! We’ve been living together for quite some time now, dating for even longer - hiding it just as long. It’s not that we have been actively trying to hide it or something, we just wanted to see how long it would take someone to become sus of us. When we realized no one would notice, we decided that if any rumors about us started, or even fans shipping us, we’d come clean. That hasn’t happened either, so we haven’t had the proper chance to address our relationship and neither of us minds.

At this point, I’m honestly afraid of revealing it to the gaming squad. Sykkuno especially. He’s my best friend, after all. I can see him being hurt by the fact that I kept a secret so big even from him. The last thing I wanna do is hurt my best friend but it’s already too late for that, it’s inevitable.

“Y/N have you looked at Twitter today?“ Rae, another streamer I’ve become close with over the months, says urgently.

Overlooking the tension in her words, I answer: “Nope, haven’t had the time. Why? What’s up?“

Before Rae can say anything else, Sykkuno joins the conversation, his voice somehow even more urgent than Rae’s. “It’s nothing, Y/N. If you see it, just don’t let it bother you, ok?”

Hearing such a tone from Rae isn’t unusual, but hearing it from Sykkuno is completely different and a lot more worrisome. “Well if it has the potential of bothering me it can’t be nothing. What’s going on?”

Just then, my phone dings with two notifications. I check to see they are messages from Rae.

“I sent you screenshots. Sorry, Sykkuno. She has to know in order to address it and defuse it as well. I know better than anyone how fast these rumors can spread, especially if no one reacts to them.“ She says, her tone barely apologetic at all.

I open the screenshots she has sent me and I find myself frozen in shock. Some old pictures of Sykkuno and I have been posted on Twitter by some random user. These pictures have started an entire thread of suspicions surrounding our relationship.

The pictures in question are from a New Year’s Eve party a mutual friend of ours held two years ago. Sure, in the pictures we are a lot closer than what would be considered a platonic proximity. And yes one of the pictures is of me kissing his cheek. Yes we were both a bit tipsy. I acknowledge all those things and yet none of them are concrete reasons for these rumors to have started piling. 

“This is silly.“ I finally say after maybe five minutes of silence on my end. ”This is absolutely ridiculous! And why are people so serious about it as well? Actual, important matters get discussed more nonchalantly than the potential relationship between two online personalities! What is this world we live in?“ I know I shouldn’t let these rumors get to me like this, especially not on camera. Still, I can’t help it. I feel it’s so unfair to Corpse. He has to put up with this as well and it’s by no means easy for him. I’ve been shipped with people from our group in the past and he always took those rumors to heart despite acting like he didn’t care. Neither of us should get worked up, but him getting upset about them creates a domino effect with my emotions - causing me to be hit just as hard as him, in some cases harder.

Rumors of the past aside, this one is the worst by far. Mostly cause even Corpse himself suspected something between Sykkuno and I at the very beginning, when we were still acquaintances, barely crossing into the realm of friends.

I pull up Twitter to look for the whole thread, barely sparing my stream chat a glance in the process. It seems pretty split - those who agree with me and those who think Sykkuno and I make ‘such an adorable couple’. The thread is ridiculously long, and if we take into account that it was only started approximately five hours ago, you can either view it as impressive, amusing or sad. Why sad? Because someone has dedicated so much time and effort into fueling the fire of a weakly supported theory.

I love Sykkuno with all my heart. Everyone knows that - fandom, streamer squad, Corpse and Sykkuno included. I love too much and too platonically to ever even dream of having a romantic connection with him. I thought that was more than obvious, but people are either blind here, or just grasping at straws. One thing’s for certain - they’re stepping on a nerve.

“Hey where’s Corpse? Did he disconnect?” Felix asks, gaining my full attention. My eyes dart to the monitor, searching through the little avatars in a desperate search for the one of my boyfriend. It’s nowhere to be found.

“He just messaged me saying his connection is unstable but he might join us later.“ Rae says, “You guys can invite someone to fill...“

“Bathroom break.“ I interrupt, not waiting for a response before shutting my mic off, putting the ‘BRB‘ graphic on my stream and yanking the headset off. I basically run down the hall to Corpse’s recording room, my heart pounding like a bass drum.

“Corpse?!“ I call out to him, one hand already on the doorknob. When five seconds pass by without a response, I barge in. 

Inside, I find his usual spot on the gaming chair empty and his slumped figure seated on his bed.

“Corpse?“ I try again, watching for even the tiniest change of body language. He remains still as a statue, not bothering to look up at me either. 

His hands are gripping the edge of the mattress, his head hanging low. His eyes are covered by the short curtain of his dark messy curls. I can’t gauge much. Is he angry? Is he sad? Both? How should I approach the situation?

Before I find the answer to any of those questions, I am kneeling in front of him, our height difference eliminated. I gently pry his hands off the mattress and take them in mine, holding them firmly but tenderly. With one hand I reach up to tilt his head so his eyes can meet mine. He complies, his tear-filled brown orbs meeting mine. Those tears have the same effect on me as fifty sharp knives stabbing into my chest. These tears focus their attack straight on my heart, tearing it to pieces.

“Baby....“

He cuts me off, “Why is it always someone else, huh? Do they deem me not worthy of being with you? Do they think you deserve better?” His voice wavers, “Well, they might be right. They are correct and there’s little I can do to prove them wrong. They mean you well, Y/N - pairing you with guys better than me. Those are some loyal fans you’ve got. They only want what’s best for you. And so do I. If ‘best’ is being with someone else then...”

It’s my turn to cut him off. I put an end to his nonsense ramble that’s slowly killing me by pressing my finger against his lips. The sternness of my gaze is beyond me as I get up and walk over to his computer setup. I put on his headset and hop into the call as well as the lobby with his avatar.

“Hey Corpse’s back!” Toast says, “Good to have you back buddy.”

“No, not Corpse.” I say in a casual, nonchalant voice.

“Wait, wha-“ Sean’s voice shows just how confused he is, representing the confusion of the entire lobby actually.

“I know all of you are streaming so this message will be heard by several different audiences so I’m gonna make myself perfectly clear.“ I take a deep breath, “Sykkuno and I aren’t dating. He’s a lovely guy and he deserves to find a girl who will treat him right. That girl isn’t and won’t be me though. I am already treating someone right. Someone who treats me more than right as well. An amazing person. A man-child with a heart of gold. You know him, to a certain extent. He goes by the name of Corpse Husband, but I prefer to call him ‘Love of my life’. Thank you for your time and attention, goodbye.“

I exit the call and turn around to find a stunned Copse looking at me.

“That was meant for you just as much.“ I say with a fake strict attitude, one hand on my hip the other rested on his desk behind me, “Were you listening?“

Within milliseconds, he’s on his feet standing directly in front of me, his lips inches away from mine. “I heard and memorized every word. But...” he pauses for a moment, “I think you have no idea how big of a chaos you just created.”

I smile mischievously, “We’ll worry about that later. For now...” I close the gap between us, connecting our lips in a sweet and passionate kiss. 

@susceptible-but-siriusexual  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @hacker-ghost  @itsminniekat  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis  @waterlilypat  @idontknowwhatthisisfam  @evi-ka  @classyandfabulous00  @redperson58  @lilysdaydreams  @the-fuck-up-of-today  @slashersdream  @chiefwombathoagiepizza  @solowheein @mythicalamphitrite  @axen-gers  @luckygirl144  @nj01

[azenkii]

 ATLA Fic Rec 

because I've been spending way too much time reading it. Btw, this is a rec for gen fics and zukka fics.

Note: an asterisk after the description means that the fic or series is incomplete. (Sadly, this is a lot of them, but I'm pretty sure most of these fics are still currently updating.)

GEN:

Anything by MuffinLance is a must-read. my personal favourites are Salvage (where Hakoda ends up with one (1) grumpy new prisoner/crewmate/adopted son) and Little Zuko v the World (where Zuko is 12, and it's adorable).

The Family You Choose by TunaFishChris is a god-tier platonic soulmate au about zuko and the gaang, so like...go read that right now

The kintsugi series by discordiansamba is an AU where Toph's parents hire Zuko-as-Lee to be a bodyguard for her, and I love it so much. It has some of the best Toph-and-Zuko sibling bonding I've ever seen. *

Dragon Moon by Satirrian is a Dragon! Zuko AU and it's incredible. It also features Bounty Hunter Zuko, so do with that what you will. *

The What We're Given series by Haicrescendo is *chef's kiss*. It's an AU where Zuko flipped his father off early on into his banishment and started living his best life with Iroh. Enter the Gaang. Shenanigans ensue. *

The Internment series by Hannahmayski is another Zuko breaks free from his dad early AU, and it's also really good. Basically, Zuko was never given the option to capture the Avatar, making his banishment indefinite. He sails around with his crew fighting the Fire Nation and it's great. *

The best way to solve your problems (is to help someone else) by hewwodarkness is an AU where kids start disappearing in Ba Sing Se during Book 2, and Zuko takes it upon himself to do a little vigilantism. It's fantastic. *

The Blue Spirit AU series by H_Faith_Marr is an AU starting from, surprise surprise, the Blue Spirit episode. The Gaang takes in Zuko without knowing who he is, and the Power of Friendship™ goes to work on Zuko. *

The the first rule of earth kingdom fight club... series by ohmygodwhy is an AU where Zuko, among other things, fights in underground cage matches, meets Toph early, and realises that his dad might be wrong. It’s pretty funny and really good. *

The The Non-Existent Twin series by FoiblePNoteworthy is hilarious. It's an AU where Zuko poses as his own twin, Li, and the Gaang buys it hook line and sinker. *

The Guilt (The Jet Adopts Zuko AU) series by FoiblePNoteworthy is also really good. Like the title says, it’s a Zuko joins the Freedom Fighters AU. *

The new ways series by blueseam is just a Zuko and the Gaang bonding fic, mostly set in the Western Air Temple, with a side of Zuko not taking care of himself and the Gaang stepping up to the job. If you’re like me and am an absolute sucker for Zuko and the Gaang, go read this.

The Family Matters series by WinterSky101 is a really good fic if you’re looking for Hakoda and Zuko. That’s all I have to say: Hakoda and Zuko.

a nation, held by snowdarkred is a GREAT Fire Nation & Zuko fic - set before and during canon, not after it. Go read it, right now.

Notable mentions: a lot of works by naggeluide are gen and pretty funny, though if you don't headcanon any of the characters as LGBT+ you might not like some of them.

ZUKKA:

anything by Haicrescendo and dickpuncher420. For Haicrescendo, my personal favourite is the Carry On For You series, and for dickpuncher420, it’s love language.

sirens & sleepless nights by Satirrian is a modern AU that just borders on dystopian. Ba Sing Se has been overtaken by the Fire Nation, Zuko is a soldier who broke away from the Fire Nation and got shot for it, and Sokka finds Zuko on the street and brings him inside. It’s amazing, go read it!

do you take this jerk to be (your one and only) by jatersade is a fic that I’m 90% sure is on every zukka fic rec list, and it deserves to be. It’s an arranged marriage AU where Zuko is engaged to Yue, and Sokka is his cultural guide. *

midnight runs and other things by isamagicdragon is a modern AU where Zuko keeps sleepwalking into Sokka’s apartment. Shenanigans ensue. Also, top-tier Zuko, Mai and Ty Lee interactions. *

Unchained Melody by avocadolove is another fic that I see a lot on rec lists, and it 100% deserves it. It’s a long fic (as of now, it’s at 63.8k) and is an AU where Sokka, after getting taken to the Spirit World by Heibai, ends up as a ghost that only Zuko can see. Ft. great enemies-to-friends-to-lovers and an incredible plot. *

Ozymandias, King of Kings by Think_of_a_Wonderful_Thought is SO good. It’s an AU where, instead of being banished, Zuko was sent to work in a coal mine/prison, which eventually becomes the target of a Water Tribe raid after Aang’s return. It can get pretty dark, so watch out for that, and it’s really long (as of now, 168.8k). But trust me, it’s worth it. *

Heart Beat Here by thefangirlingdead is an adorable Modern AU oneshot where Zuko, while shopping for engagement rings with Katara, freaks out when Sokka lies about where he is. It’s a happy ending, don’t worry. One of my favourite fics.

feels like we only go backwards by oldpotatoe and A Certain Slant of Light by JustGettingBy are both amnesia fics where Sokka loses his memory several years after the war. They’re both so, so good. A Certain Slant of Light is finished, but feels like we only go backwards is not.

reality strikes, so bring back the night by zukkababey is a time-travel oneshot where Western-Air-Temple Sokka wakes up in the future to find his older self married to one (1) Fire Lord Zuko. Fluffy and funny. 

maybe i just see you (in everything) by epicbubbles is a really cute Modern AU oneshot with love confessions and just fluff all around. 10/10 go read it!!

it’s the illusion of separation by argentoswan is a fic that has legendary status and it absolutely deserves it. God-tier Modern AU where Sokka ends up working at the Jasmine Dragon alongside his former high school bully, Zuko. (Kind of) enemies-to-friends-to-lovers, and it’s just...SO good. *

say you like your shirt soggy by crosspin is a reallyyy nice 5+1 fic. It’s Modern AU, and it’s pretty short (3.7k), but the amount of yearning that gets packed into that 3.7k,,,,*chef’s kiss*

and they were roommates by flydunes is another Modern AU where sokka puts up an ad for a roommate. Zuko moves in, and Sokka gets a crush. It’s just good vibes all around :) *

like blood from a stone by catalinacat is a Soulmate AU that took a completely different direction with the soulmate trope. The summary does a better job of explaining it than I can. *

absence of heat, excess of destiny by theycallmesuperboy is one of the best soulmate AUs out there. it’s not too long, only 4.3k words, but it covers the entire series and then some. Seriously, go read this.

it isn’t strange, but it’s true by theholyterror is a 5+1 post-canon fic with some of the best pining I’ve ever seen, ft. Ambassador Sokka and Fire Lord Zuko. The 5+1 is times Zuko went out of his way to touch Sokka.  *

like the sun inside of you by ofherlionheart is another post-canon fic, and it’s incredible so far. the first chapter alone is 23k, so it’s already a decently long read. *

the stemverse: earth science zuko au series by acezukos is a REALLY good Modern/University AU. So far, it only has one work (earth system history) but that work is already *chef’s kiss*. The series is incomplete, but earth system history is complete!

rebellion’s such a hushed affair by zeitgeistofnow is a fantastic Modern AU that, like sirens & sleepless nights, borders on dystopian. Actually, I think it is dystopian, but it hasn’t been tagged as such. Anyway, 10/10, go read it right now immediately

Mark Time by foil is a Modern AU where Sokka ghosted Zuko years ago, and they get brought back together by Aang and Katara’s wedding. It’s really good, but the fic has some pretty heavy content, so make sure you read the warnings. *

That birds would sing and think it were not night by HisMomoness is a Modern AU that has Zuko tutoring Sokka, with absolute top-tier pining. Like, seriously, the pining is insane. Superr good

this love burns so yellow (becoming orange and in its time, exploding) by meliebee is one of the best post-canon fics I’ve ever read. It features a civil war in the Fire Nation (that gets resolved about halfway through) and some great Toph and Zuko interactions, as well as some Grade A pining. 

boy problems by burnt_oranges is FANTASTIC post-canon and has sokka and zuko in an accidental arranged marriage, plus some attempted assassinations. It’s great.

zuko vs the homie sexual agenda by parmigiano has Zuko and Sokka pining for each other in Ikea. Do I need to say more?

Friendship Bracelets by peachcitt is a Modern AU best friends to lovers. Pretty short (4.9k), but the pining is immaculate.

isn’t this the vision that you wanted by nebulastucky is INCREDIBLE, I read it recently because it just got completed and it’s *chef’s kiss*. It’s post-canon ft. mutual pining and some reallyyy good ‘and there was only one bed’ scenes.

Real Slow and no one knows anything but us by surveycorpsjean and quidhitch respectively are two of my favourite post-canon Ambassador Sokka and Fire Lord Zuko fics. Go check them out!

The Duke’s a Hazard by naggeluide is a really nice AU starting from the Western Air Temple, where the Duke decides that Sokka and Zuko are now his new parents. They bond over coparenting, and the (kind of) enemies-to-friends-to-lovers is really good. Plus, it’s funny.

Those Who Favor Fire by CSHfic and VSfic is a really good fic of the Spymaster Sokka AU. If you don’t know what that is, it’s an AU where Sokka fakes his death and goes undercover in an organisation that wants to kill Zuko.

Fics I added after posting (so far, all Zukka):

The Road Between Action and Inaction by Donvex is a fic that I can't believe I left out the first time?? It's a modern hitchhiking AU and it's great.

Rituals of the Ocean Floor by Donvex is a nice one too. It's only around 2.2k words, but it's a Fox Spirit!Zuko and Sharkman!Sokka AU, and I just really like the writing style.

by the stars above, i knew we were in love by theycallmesuperboy and The Fate of Nations in Our Hands by sapphic_ambitions are both top-tier post-canon fics. Be warned: by the stars above is a liiiittle bit angsty.

blue's clues by parmigiano is a really good Modern AU where Sokka, a university student journalist, gets ahold of the phone number of the Blue Spirit, a new campus vigilante. He ends up talking to the Blue Spirit to get an interview out of him, and it's really cute!

Honourable mention: the Avatar Zuko series by the_cloud_whisperer is one of the best series I've ever read, and it's really long - it got completed about a month ago, with 493.6k words in total (415k if you ignore the extra work made up of author's notes). It develops all the characters really well, especially Lu Ten, but the main ship is Zukaang. Personally, my biggest problem with Zukaang is the age difference, and Aang is aged up to be Zuko's age (or older, I think? I don't really remember) in this. I kept reading it because the plot was too good to give up, and I do highly recommend it, but yeah.

I’ll add more fics if I remember them, but this is what I had bookmarked. Also, shameless self plug here because I also write ATLA fic @ azenki on ao3

[odi-et-amo85]

edit: All of these are my personal viewing experiences. I tried my best to be polite about them, but please don’t be rude when my opinions aren’t the same as yours. 🙏

I know that someone (might have been a mutual) tagged me in this, but the tag didn’t work. Yet I saw my url and thought by myself, “I should remember this.” 😬 Yet a week has passed (of me postponing and not being sure whether I could fill out the whole thing), and now I have forgotten who the kind person was who selected me for this challenge. Whoever you are, kob khun ka. 💚 So, here we go:

1. Your all time favourite bl and why: This has to be A Tale of 1,000 Stars; I cannot explain exactly what it is that makes it so unforgettable for me. Perhaps it’s because it was my very first BL. But whatever it is, the entire atmosphere around it makes it my all time fave: the unconventional story, the characters, the underlying message, the location, the humour, the metaphors (hornbills my beloved 🥰). Whenever I feel gloomy I go back to AToTS, and I use the OST as my goodnight music. In short, this one has a special place in my heart.

2. That one bl that scarred you for life: That would have to be Until We Meet Again. No hate, because overall I like the show quite a lot. (Cute main couple, lovely second couple, I could see the structure of the script was pretty well constructed. What rubbed me the wrong way was the way UWMA handled KornIn’s suicide. Suicide is already a very heavy subject, and the reason for it in UWMA is even more heartbreaking. On top of that the explicit manner in which the suicide scene was filmed. My criticism is not intended as a conservative stance against any “taboo” or “contentious” subject. (For heaven’s sake, ≈ 90% of my tv experience consists of lgbtqa+ content!) But I do think that as a show runner you should pay a lot of attention to how (segments of) your production may come across. Especially whenever you include events in your script that either show people affected by some kind of mental illness (and yes, I think feeling so despairing that you think taking your own life is the only option left for you qualifies) or the serious problems members from the lgbtqa+ community encounter (in this case parental homophobia so severe that it drives both sons to do the unthinkable). I think media should first and foremost be entertaining. Not the cause of many triggers and ripped open wounds. You may call me a nitpicker for this, but I think UWMA could have done better in this respect. Finally, what bothered me were the “flashback” scenes in which Dean and Pharm were confronted with vivid memories of a trauma that wasn’t even their own. Truly, I get the concept of Until We Meet Again. And I can certainly appreciate that idea. But I think the same effect could have been achieved with a less intense visualisation of something so psychologically taxing as suicide.

3. Is there any bl that made you feel very single: I am actually single 😂, but if I’m honest, I don’t mind it one bit. In fact, in this stage of my life, I like being on my own. So I can’t name a show here; for the simple reason that I don’t have any negative feelings about being single. 🤷‍♀️

4. If you could change one thing from a bl, which one would it be? I would probably get rid of a couple of side-plots in Oxygen, so that Phu and Kao could get a proper development of their love story. I really liked their dynamics and I thought the idea of genuinely having to winning someone’s trust –rather than “just” winning someone’s heart– was a very original plot. Phu had serious issues with bonding with anyone, not just Kao, and the plot that we saw depicted revolved wholly around Phu trying to open up, and Kao attempting to win Phu’s trust. That was beautiful to see, but I would have loved to see them really get together at some point. Maybe this series just deserves a season 2 🤔, or they should have made PhuKao’s subplot less complicated. Anyhow, this was just a waste of potential.

5. That one bl you detest (don’t hold back): Obviously I could’ve gone for really problematic shows like TharnType. But that would be a choice of which I didn’t really expect a lot to begin with. So instead my answer would be this… Please, please promise you won’t all desert me for this. 🙀 Here we go: Make It Right. BAM, there you have it. And the reason…apart from the (ususal) cringe expressions and inappropriate sex jokes, it’s a pretty small segment of the entire show. But it’s the scene where Frame “overpowers” (sorry I don’t know how else to describe it than that) Book on the bed and tries to kiss him. Book clearly isn’t into it, and objects, but to no avail. A sort of intense house track starts playing and it’s clearly implied they take things to the next level. Curiously, “the day after,” everything seems to be quite okay. But the whole scene leading up to this is just very very problematic and borderline assault to me. What frustrates me the most about this, is that in the remainder of MIR Book and Frame are an adorable couple. It’s touching to see how patient Book is with Frame when the Frame gets depressed. But the aforementioned thing just ruins it all for me. As for the other couples, they were fine I guess but not very impressionable to me. I think the premise of this bl show was good, but the execution made it a disappointing experience for me.

6. Your top 5: 1.) Not Me; 2.) My Engineer; 3.) He’s Coming to Me; 4.) Ingredients; 5.) Dark Blue Kiss

7. That trashy bl that you lowkey like: 2 Moons 2 (I don’t whether this generally considered “trashy”, but it’s my guilty pleasure 🤭)

8. Your favourite Korean bl (it’s important we know): That has to be You Make Me Dance. ☺️ I have a huge weakness for dance combined with romance in tv series. Must be some kind of adolescent nostalgia… 🥲 Why that is, you can read here.

9. But also your top 3 for kbls: Honestly, YMMD is the only Korean BL I ever watched! 🙈 So, I am going to cheat and answer with a top 3 non-Thai BLs. 🤫 1.) Utsukushii Kare 🇯🇵; 2.) Papa & Daddy 🇹🇼; 3.) Mr. Cinderella 🇻🇳

10. Season 2? Which One? Oh, definitely My Engineer (but I’m pretty sure we’re not going to get it rip 😢)

11. A bunch of dramas will air soon. Which ones are you most excited for? Between Us (don’t know whether this is a 2nd season or a parallel story) – Moonlight Chicken & Cupid’s Last Wish (bc EarthMix 😸, but I feel more confident about the former one) – Never Let Me Go (I have a very strong feeling this one is either going to be legendary good or legendary trash 👀) – Check Out (I will be honest, this one is not necessarily about the plot 🙆‍♀️)

12. Tag them! Please only do it if you want to, no pressure! Tbh, I think the vast majority of my bl mutuals has already done this. But if you haven’t, please consider yourself tagged! 😘

@thequeenofsastiel (bc I’d like to hear more of your opinions 🙂)

@onstoryladders (so you have someone who tagged you <3)

@noxclara (so you’ll watch more bl 😌)

@ghosttotheparty (bc you’re awesome and I just wanted to tag you ^^ -> and perhaps a new interest of yours will emerge 😉)

[omarandjohnny]

URL MEME!!

Tagged by @gunsatthaphan DOREEN ILUUUUUUUUUUUU <333333333

1. why did you choose your url? omarandjohnny, a reference to my alltime favorite movie, My Beautiful Laundrette. (I’ve been omarandjohnny online since 2003)

2. any sideblogs? a backup, johnnyandomar, and ‘spellboundtoo’ years ago (it was my jewelry shop’s blog) 

3. how long have you been on tumblr? since  March 8, 2010

4. do you have a queue tag? nope, the queue runs 24/7, usually posting between 30-50 times a day (depending on how many posts I’ve hoarded like a dragon that week, lol)

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? Livejournal and Insanejournal were starting to empty out, fandom friends were migrating here and there. I have mutuals here that I’ve known for over 15+ years, thanks to our flocking from site to site together 🖤

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp? I used to prefer character icons when we were on the journal sites, but I had my face up on Twitter and FB already back then, so I just decided I’d rather be me here as well. It’s a picture of me in skully makeup before a Halloween event in 2014. Previous icon was another pic of me with skully makeup (what me, predictable?)

7. why did you choose your header? Recently changed it to the Metal Fetishist from Tetsuo: The Iron Man because it’s Pride Month! 🔩🏳️‍🌈

8. what‘s your post with the most notes? This blog has over 151,000 posts so far, and 90% are reblogs so I haven’t the foggiest XD

9. how many mutuals do you have? Not sure, being a multifandom floozy I tend to gain and lose fandom mutuals every quarter. I don’t unfollow too often, though- usually if I have a few interests in common with someone besides the fandom hyperfixation, once ya got me you’re stuck with me 😉😂

10. how many followers do you have? 913 (a good lot are b0ts, icky)

11. how many people do you follow? 311

12. have you ever made a shitpost? On occasion, usually fandom-related.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? Other than the queue doing its thing, I hop on every few hours to gather new pretty things to reblog and queue. I’m not as chatty here as I am on twitter (I’m omarandjohnny on pretty much every social media site, it’s easy to track me down, lol)

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? Not a full-blown argument, but there have been some trivial anons in the past. These days all unsolicited anons are swiftly blocked and ignored. 

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this‘ posts? The quickest way for me to not reblog something is to guilt me/order me to. 

16. do you like tag games? I do indeed!

17. do you like ask games? Love them! Especially music-themed ones. 

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? To steal Doreen’s answer, all my friends are tumblr famous to me!

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? ILUUUUUUUUUUUUUU ALL 😘

20. tags? I’ll tag the last five in my notifs (if ya fancy it) @prometheuswelsh @anxious-apple @zippywafflebuns @noahreidhours @negrowhat​

[frillshark-fr]

How do you get people to always buy your dragons? Genuine question

i was gonna say something like “haha i have no fucking clue” but that would be a lie i think about this a lot actually so i might have some insights i’ve been breeding dragons as my primary activity on FR since i started playing FR (in 2014...) and people have only started actually buying dragons from me consistently like, 5-6 months ago, despite 2-3 attempts at running a genuine hatchery onsite that always died due to lack of interest & not really being worth the effort. 

so ive thought a lot about what the hell is happening now and why my dragons are suddenly consistently selling and I think ive come down to these being the main points of advice i can give: 1. make friends! be friendly! don’t be weird! be a cool and fun person to interact with! 2. post consistently. post your dragons consistently. post about other stuff consistently. just be an active member of the community 3. POST YOUR SHIT IN THE “#FLIGHT RISING” TAG. THIS IS PROBABLY THE ONLY TRUELY HELPFUL THING I SAY IN THIS POST 4. make pairs that are sexy as hell and be openly proud of them. make dragons and pairs that you like, not what you think will necessarily sell. people can tell when you like stuff and being genuinely passionate about something, whatever the fuck it is, will get other people passionate as well longer versions/explanations under the cut because man this got a mile long. i wasn’t kidding when i said i think about this a lot and i am so sorry if you wanted something concise and useful

1. to be a little glib. i am mutuals/friends with more clout in the FR community than I do kjdshfdsfdhjhkfdf shoutout to everyone who draws their dragons really good on a regular basis because i am riding on your coattails to sell my dragons. i love you this was never my intent, obviously! DO NOT BEFRIEND PEOPLE BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU WILL GET STUFF FROM THEM IT’S JUST A REALLY BAD THING TO DO TO PEOPLE!!! i wouldn’t be friends w/ people if i didn’t genuinely like and get along with them! no amount of pixel cash is worth putting up with people you dont like or abusing people you admire!  but i’d also somehow feel wrong to just... neglect mentioning this factor. idk it’s probably a self-esteem thing sjdkgfhdsf i just Don’t feel like my #success has been totally out of my own effort because its not like im #hustling or whatever i just posted dragons and stuff happened

-----

2. being consistent! just. posting consistently! posting Every Hatchling I Have and Talking About Them On Tumblr!  Once I had a couple nests just sell super fast likely due to aforementioned clout, i was emboldened to just post more of my nests more often and I swear this has more effect than anything else. i just needed the self-esteem boost to Start Doing That posting consistently makes ppl follow u for ur content which gets even more people to look at your dragons which gets more people to buy your dragons.

-

2a. Also just post a lot in general, even if you aren’t necessarily posting about your dragons for sale. it definitely helps! just be friendly and active and people will come

-----

3. post your shit in the tag. not in “#dragon-sales” or “#fr-dragon-sales” or anything weird like that because I don’t know if anyone actually looks at those, but people definitely browse “#flight rising”. no matter how many followers you have, more people will see your content if you post it in #flight rising than if you just chuck it into the void. 

-

3a. however! do not put links into the post if you want it to actually show up in the tag. tumblr is cool in that it doesn’t actually matter that much when you post something, the same way it really matters on twitter bc twitter has algorithms that decide for you what it thinks you want to be seeing whereas tumblr just shows you everything in chronological order. if you post something into the tag at 1am... it will still be there at 2pm when people log on and start scrolling.

the only thing tumblr seems to consistently hide from a tag (and possibly a dashboard, but idk) are posts with links in them, as a half-assed attempt to limit spam. instead of linking to your sales tab/to the dragons directly in the post, reblog it with the links instead. to reduce latency between a post going up and the links being available, i type out the links in the initial post, cut them, post the thing into the tag, then very quickly reblog, paste the links, and post the reblog jdhfsdf. i don’t know if that benefits anything really? but it can sometimes take me a while to type links, so if i posted, pressed reblog, typed up all the links, then posted, it’d be like ~15 minutes where someone may see the post, think “oh i would like to buy those dragons”, then can’t find the link, think “oh well, i will just find it later”, scroll on, and just... completely forget about it. so uh. go quick?

-

3b. the armchair sociologist in me also thinks self-reblogging has the added benefit of like... you know how people are more likely to tip a barista when a dollar is already in the tip jar? or how people are more likely to take one of those little tabs on a flyer if one of them is already missing? i think that works with notes, too. i don’t know why i think that or why it happens i just swear once a post gets 1 note, suddenly it gets Even More Notes, and if it doesn’t get any notes for a while it will sit at 0 notes until the end of time. so giving yourself 1 obligatory note makes people more likely to interact. i think

-----

4. all of these are hard to quantify but this one is especially so: have cool and unique dragons. make your pairs sexy as hell. don’t put all your eggs (hah) into the one basket of selling dragons that are technically “popular”. we have all seen triple white/triple obsidian/triple orca/triple any other popular colors and cherub/pere/stained or wasp/bee/glim pthahlos or whatever. they’re pretty! we get it! but everyone has had one and everyone has had those pairs and market for dragons like that can be super oversaturated. try to break free from that and sell dragons that people can only get from you. I can’t tell you what to do though bc that rly depends on you. make pairs that you find exciting or interesting and people will feel that. i have a very specific theme and aesthetic that i don’t feel like is especially common on FR and i am genuinely very enthusiastic about it. marine shit is my Thing:tm: both on and off FR and dragons are one of my many ways of expressing that   if you have a Thing:tm:, either some fr-centric aesthetic (like being super into plague or earth or light or something) or something more general (such as any of the -punks or -cores)... just fuckin roll with it honestly. if you’re goth? make got h dragons. like scene stuff that looks straight out of a middle school in 2010? rock that hot-topic lair. outdoorsey type? make dragons that look like you’d meet them on a hike in the woods. it really works with anything!  people can tell when you really love something and i know that seeing someone really love something, even if it’s not necessarily MY thing, makes me really excited too!! 

-

4a. never show fear. people can smell fear. never be like “well this one isn’t that good” because suddenly now you’ve planted the idea that it’s ugly in other people’s heads when they may have really liked it had you not accidentally suggested to them that it’s an ugly dragon. people are EXTREMELY suggestible to even VERY minor cues so be always a little bit bolder than you think you should be you’d be surprised at how many times ive been like “eh, this one’s kind of a dud, i’ll probably have to exalt this one when the auction expires” and then that hatchling is the first to sell. never ever ever ever decide what other people like for them. always act like your dragons are the hottest shit in all the land and Believe It. this is what people mean when they say “fake it till you make it”

- 4b. also, idk if it’s true of everyone but it’s really off-putting to see someone having serious pity-parties for themselves, on sales posts or otherwise. ive had bad experiences with people who are uncomfortably quick to self-depreciate (because they were using their genuine self-hatred to manipulate me or my friends), so i might be a little more trigger-happy about avoiding this behavior than others, but don’t weaponize your sadness to guilt people into doing what you want. it’s really not cool.

-----

okay i think that’s my entire manifesto on how i do dragon selling. anon i am so sorry im sure you were expecting like “believe in yourself :)” and here i am dissecting dragon selling like it’s a frog in a science class

edit: AFTER ALL THAT I STILL THOUGHT OF ONE MORE THING. It’s not really a Point, just a Reminder:

i don’t post about all the times i have to exalt dragons that don’t sell. you are seeing me being very selective about what i post. you dont sit and stare at my lair or click through offspring lists or check old sales posts. there are a lot of times where someone just doesn’t sell. even now when i’m selling stuff pretty consistently i will still sometimes have dragons that don’t sell for seemingly no reason. even dragons I think are sure to sell will sometimes just... not. and that’s ok! you gotta just be.. ok with that. it’s par for the course. i typically list dragons for 7 days on the AH, give them a couple more days after their auction expires (partially because i forget, partially to give them a grace period for people to pm/ask me about them), and then exalt them after that point. w/ some dragons that i don’t think got a fair shake for one reason or another (such as the sales post not showing up in the tag or something) i do a little clearance (like the halloween dragons i recently posted) but for the most part if they don’t sell, i just exalt them. 90% of the time i don’t even bother to level them up i just press the exalt button and call it a day. it’s fine

[rae-arts777]

Makoto X Salazar

HELL YES @arty-dork

They became pen pals when Makoto was in jail. Salazar felt like he owned him (considering Makoto was the reason he got a second chance in life).

After case two, Makoto flew back to LA to see him and Tom. Tom took up most of his time. Salazar found it nice seeing how well the two got along.

While Makoto stayed with TC, him and Salazar started texting a lot. Salazar would send him pictures of Tom and him to show Makoto how they’re doing.

Tom started playing soccer, and wanted Makoto to come to his first game. Salazar texted Makoto and was like “but if you can’t that’s fine no worries”. Makoto showed up at the soccer field the next day extremely jet lagged, but was one of the loudest ones there cheering Tom on. After the game Salazar carried Makoto back to his place so he could sleep.

Salazar was able to taken Tom to Disneyland, Makoto of course flew down to join them. When Salazar became tired, Makoto sucked it up and went with Tom on the rides even though some of them made him want to puke.

After case 4 Makoto traveled the world trying coffee. He made America his last stop so he could go see Salazar. Makoto doesn’t know what it was, but something told him to open his coffee shop in LA.

Salazar offered for Makoto to stay with them, but Makoto felt bad so he got himself an apartment close by. Tom is just happy that Makoto is literally a 10 minutes walk away now.

Salazar quickly becomes a regular in his coffee shop. Tom tags along most of the time. Makoto knows their orders by heart now, the moment he sees them walk in, he’s already making them their order.

Game/movie night becomes a thing for them. Makoto comes over, they either play a board game (tho Makoto is always helping Tom cheat) or watch a movie, and order pizza. If they watch a movie, Tom either sits in the middle of them or on the floor cause he’s so invested into the movie. When Tom falls asleep, Salazar and Makoto will end up watching a different movie together. Sometimes in these moments, Makoto starts dozing off onto Salazar’s shoulder. Salazar let’s him and looks down, dying cause of how cute Makoto looks.

After a few months, it’s clear to all of Makoto’s coffee staff that there is some feelings between him and Salazar. They have started placing bets on who will confess first.

Makoto has picked up and dropped off Tom a few times too school. He started even showing up to some school functions. Teachers and Tom’s friends can hear convos between them “have your homework?” “Yeah” “be good” “I will”. All of the school staff is trying to figure out if Makoto is just a close friend or Salazar’s boyfriend. They’re too afraid to ask though. Tom’s friends are just as confused, if they ask Tom he’s just like “I mean I guess?” And when they go over, Makoto is 90% of the time there.

Confession, they were both drunk. They had gone out to celebrate the success of the coffee shop. Makoto got wasted real quick, probably the shots, Salazar tried to stop him but Makoto ended up roping him in for more drinks. A mutual drove them back to Salazar’s place. Tom was spending the night at a friend’s. Both were leaning on each other, stumbling to the bedroom. Makoto pressed himself up into Salazar’s lips. Salazar took a few moments to register what was happening and then slowly kissed back. Makoto was so drunk tho, he fell asleep while kissing. Salazar put him to bed and went a slept on the couch. Next morning they both has a very long and awkward conversation about their feelings.

Makoto was scared, he was like “I don’t want to put labels on this just yet”. Salazar was understanding, so they agreed, they were dating, but wouldn’t call themselves boyfriends just yet.

Few months (9-10) into dating, things are going really good. However, Makoto is still scared, mainly cause he doesn’t think he’s good enough, or Salazar will end up leaving him like everyone eventually does. Does he tell Salazar? No, he’s scared, he doesn’t want to ruin things, things are good now.

A year into dating, their first fight. Salazar wants to take it to the next level, moving in, calling Makoto his boyfriend, Makoto is still scared, still saying it’s too soon. They argued for hours, luckily it was during the day so Tom was at school. Makoto breaks down, he tells Salazar he should just find someone else. Salazar stares at him, he can’t remember the last time he saw Makoto this broken, he remembers his face his friends “died” in front of him. He kneels down and holds Makoto close, telling him too bad, cause he doesn’t plan on finding someone else that’s just like him. Makoto cried even more. Finally he opened up to Salazar about all his fears and doubts.

Makoto moved in with them, Tom was so excited. He said “fucking finally!” Makoto laughed, Salazar just shook his head sighing and went “I can’t even be mad, cause he’s right”

Makoto is the little spoon, he loves being in Salazar’s arms. He feels safe in them. Sometimes he gets embarrassed by how small he is compare to Salazar “your muscles are as big as my head” “you’re exaggerating, no theyre not”

Makoto speaks in Japanese sometimes just to annoy him. Salazar will the proceed to speak in Spanish, which annoys Makoto but also gets him flustered, cause he loves the way it sounds from him. Also, 99% of the time when Salazar speaks Spanish, he’s flirting with him.

Tom started calling Makoto dad as well, Makoto felt like his heart was going to explode when Tom called him dad. “Have a good day at school” “ok! Bye dad!”

Makoto likes to sit on Salazar’s lap and cover him in kisses. One of the rare moments Salazar becomes flustered. Makoto loves seeing Salazar stern and strict face become undone. He’s proud that he’s the only one that can unravel him.

Both have scars from their past. Makoto lovingly pecks at Salazar’s scars and tells him things like “they make you look more badass”. Makoto is more self conscious about his scars. Salazar will kiss or gently run his fingers along them, assuring Makoto he finds him still handsome with them. It’s become just a way of saying “I love you” to each other, one of them softly kissing or running their finger along the others scars.

Makoto likes to play with Salazar‘s pericings. He likes the way the rings feel, they’re just nice and smooth. Salazar hates it cause his ears are a bit sensitive, but he also still enjoys the feeling.

Salazar likes to run his hands through Makoto’s hair. Slicking it back, playing with the hair swish on top of his head. As Makoto’s hair gets longer to wear he’s tying it into a man bun, Salazar sometimes undoes his bun just so he can play with his hair.

Makoto tried his best to learn Spanish for Salazar. He’s not perfect, but he knows enough to get by. Salazar attempted to try to learn Japanese, but it was too hard for him to understand. But he does know simple phrases such as greetings, and asking where the bathroom is.

They took a trip to Japan. Tom was excited to see where Makoto was from. They spent their time there, Makoto teaching them of Japanese culture, siteseeing, and also visiting Miki’s grave. While Makoto and Tom were taking some picture with some pretty trees, Salazar slipped off back to Miki’s grave. He promised her he look after and love her son, and told her how much Makoto means to him. He promised to make sure they all come back more often to Japan to visit her.

Makoto is the one who usually cooks dinner. He surprised Salazar and Tom with traditonal Hispanic meals. Salazar is really surprised on how well and perfect Makoto makes the dishes.

Salazar did research on Japanese culture to get things for interior decorations, to make Makoto feel more at home. He attempted to make homemade sushi one day, but failed big time. Makoto came home and laughed at what a mess Salazar as made, watching Salazar struggle to roll a sushi roll with his big hands. Makoto taught them how to properly make sushi. So now, Thursday nights are make your own sushi night.

It’s no surprise Salazar gets hit on, a lot. Makoto is the one who gets easily jealous, he knows everyone wants a piece of Salazar. When he gets jealous, he’ll throw himself into Salazar’s arms and become clingy. He’ll glare at the person flirting with him, or will peck at Salazar’s neck and chin so the person gets a hint.

Salazar is the one who tends to get more clingy. When they’re out, he always tends to have a hand on Makoto’s waist. Just holding him close, like he’s afraid he might slip away.

It took a while for them to find a comfortable way for both of them to hold hands. They use to do an awkward hand dance before settling on a good position. Now, holding hands comes naturally.

Friday nights are date nights. They’ll either go out to a bar, or stay in watching their favorite show. Tom always sleeps over at a friend’s house on their date nights.

Makoto is usually the first one up, Salazar lazily follows behind. Makoto would be making coffee or breakfast, and sometimes get scared when he feels too big arms wrap around him. Salazar will hold him, and lay his head on his while watching him cook or brew coffee.

When Salazar is free, he helps out in the coffee shop, mainly doing some heavy lifting. Also dealing with rude customers. All he has to do is just show up and glare at them. One time a customer was so rude he did almost hit them, but Makoto was there to make sure that didn’t happen.

Makoto love to lay on Salazar’s chest and listen to his heartbeat. He loves being in his arms, and just listening to his steady heartbeat. It’s relaxing, espically after a stressful day.

Salazar wanted to propose and had a big thing plan, but he was very bad at hiding the ring. Makoto found it one day while cleaning. The ring was a golden band, with a beautiful engraving in it. Salazar walked in on him holding him and was embarrassed and upset he found it. Makoto just laughed and kissed him all over going “yes”

[stray-tori]

An Innocent Sin & the good gay flashback ft. my descent into madness

I wasn’t sure if I should post this but I mostly want it archived so here we go. This is from like,, September?

So. “An Innocent Sin” is a dumpster fire unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I don’t remember why I decided to read it. maybe I was crazy. Either way... I read it. It soon started to touch upon (very very outlandish) sexual abuse which I thought was interesting. (the angst, not so much some of the wack circumstances surrounding it)

ANYWAY. at some point... we have a flashback. And not just that. It has a gay character.

And it turns rly gay. which mind you, is still in a het smut manwha (that has a “gay” side couple, but still!)

And it destroyed me.

For those who want to read it because I genuinely think the flashback is a decent bit, it’s all the bonus chapters between chapter 77 and 78 I think. There’s a part before that too, but idk where exactly anymore. (It’s on lezhin! or your platform of choosing)

I don’t THINK you’ll need any other knowledge to get the flashback bit? but it’s been a while.

Below the cut (rip mobile users), you can read all of my amazing reactions (all of these were text messages, for context - but I took most of the replies and convos about other things out). Post is also tagged as long post. :))

(i’m serious, this is fucking long)

__________

Here I am. Liking the gay flashback character. Feck. Main dude is still straight but idk it's cute pff

This is a mess. The girl white hair likes, likes black hair, maybe, but thinks white hair is attractive

What just happened is sth I'd like to know too pff He's so cute tho omg. Watch me melt Can we stay in this flashback before everything got perverted af and before white hair gets assaulted all the time I would send an eyebrow emote if I could Context: he's asking he says it again

Ik it's not mutual but loookkk he's so sweet. He's kinda rude in present time, can't we stay in this flashback forever

I never asked for gay, never expected gay but I got gay

This story is trash why am I still reading it shdhhd

He caught his mom cheating. And now she's forcing him to watch??? What is thissss Well adoptive mom But still sudhdidu what Bitch how dare YOU exist

Save my babyyyy

Yay sister that's not yet a rapist to the rescueee

This flashback is actually just nicer in every way let's just stay here This is a super long flashback btw Idek anymore what triggered it

Okay I think I'm gonna make the sensible decision and let this dumpster fire rest and just go sleep

It was very wild. I kinda wanna see white hair get therapy but it has 90 chapters and I'm at like 30... So I'm very concerned this is gonna be very dragged out. Idek if it's even finished ahahsududi - but I do kinda wanna see where it goes and see more cute Noah (white hair) so. Here we are.

yeahhh like i was down for the sexual abuse angst but then the mother killed the adoptive son's mother bc the dad had a thing for her?? and it was someone a person studying with white hair knew and so he's investigating and I'm like how did this turn into a crime organisation kind of plot

hhhhhhh i... i appreciate these horny things also tackling abuse but it always kind of gives me weird vibes to have both, especially when its very horny. And when people are horny to people who've been abused. Idk but I'd assume... you might try NOT to tie them up if they're frequently bondaged during their assaults. I'm just.... disjdksdj hello?? am i weird?? why are they fine with it???

also this manwha is so wild, theres this murder mystery investigation thing and then theres just a couple doing honry stuff sprinkled in between and i'm like OKAY

they rescued a guy in their basement and he's understandably very traumatized and they're trying to question him cut to our main couple trying bondage which i still dont understand bECAUSE HE'S A RAPE VICITM WHY ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS the ones questioning arent the main couple of course but idshkjds

like im glad he's somehow okay with all this horny stuff despite his trauma and im glad he can be happy and have a nice relationship but DO WE NEED THIS MUCH OF IT he's very cute tho

i like that even when i try other stuff lezhin recommends me it still has large amount of gay in it

[mei: i mean... that's pretty great, if you ask me]

I mean I agree, I'm enjoying the gay eheheh these tonal whiplashes there's not even that much white space between the panels fhjd nvm it just turned horny goddamn it can there be 1 chapter without fucking? okay, there were the flashbacks

WE ARE BACK IN FLASHBACKS but im not getting the gay relationship, sad

OH WAIT AM I GETTING GAY COMFORT bc thats very good too

OH NNOOO this turned sad very quickly

I'M SORRY IM SPAMMING BUT THIS IS JUST ANGSTY

I'M :((((

different species confirmed

I rly like them :((( I like the current girl too but it's just..... very horny with her. the flashbacks are nice [current tori edit: she’s very unloyal idk why i said I liked her] im weird HHHHH RIPPP 

someone help him he looks so saddddd

not sure if thats the most healthy relationship but I'LL TAKE IT

AWWW black hair's mom cooks mild food for them bc Noah can't eat spicy food :((( im soft

PFFF

I LOVE THE FLASHBACKS :(((

awww

i feel like theyve done much more bonding than noah's current relationship. I mean yes I think its cute when she comforts him, too, but they rarely do anything besides be horny together

OH OH THEY'RE KISSING

best buildup, honestly

the position is hornier than I'd like later here goes hope it stays cute

D-did someone just respect the word "stop"??? I am amazed

i think you might uh. have some trauma stuff too so yknow

Dohye is a little dramatic in his reassurance but it's all rly cute so I'm :(( I like them a lot pls stay like this getting invested in flashbacks is always like: ik it wont stay but pls stay like this

hELP

chapters ending in "i wanna touch him" is never good. I'm scared. Oh okay he didnt do anything. PHEW. He's already better than the girl, can't they just end up together lmao

[Noah was jealous]

w-why do you look so evil dohye haukdhjs

oh. oh no. the horny is starting. pls dont... just be cute forever

DOHYE NO YOU WERE SO DECENT WHY ARE YOU LYING ABOUT KOREAN TRADITIONS TO GET HIM TO DO STUFF HORNY STUFF TOO NO PLS STOP I JUST- WHEEE TvT the manwha is actually less visually horny in the flashbacks but im not sure if its bc its BL which isnt rly the genre of the manwha or if its bc they're still kids basically, which... I'd respect the latter, tho I'd prefer it to be like this constantly haha

okay. he's not respecting stop anymore, but it's also more of embarrassed nature more than "no i dont want this stop" so maybe i can forgive it. Still losing points, but he hugged him and it was sweet so HHHHHHHHHHH NOT SURE HOW I SHOULD JUDGE THIS SITUATION

They [Noah’s family] forbid him to visit his friends house I AM DEVASTATED

understandable they're a rapist, a fucked up murderer mother and a father with a thing for younger women so

tho he dont know any of that but yknow he's so pretty just fucking end me on the spot

hooo

they are boyfriends and ik from the future that his sister is gonna ruin it allll she has those drugs that make visual imaginations feel like they rly happened to the person (dont know if thats real but holy fuck its terrifying) and she's used it before to say that Noah assualted her. and im pretty sure shes gonna use it again bc there was a panel of Noah remembering Dohye being uhhhh intimate with her and thats why Noah began to hate him and im so sad im not ready for it. bc he's denied it in the future and i honestly couldnt see it happening even before that or she drugged Dohye, i guess thats a possibility too

[current tori: oh girl, it’s neither and it’s wack]

which if, btich you gonna die even more enough rambling, more reading. this makes me so sad but also spicy

on the manwha note, he thinks Noah doesnt like his family bc he's adopted and doesnt feel comfy which....... fair enough i suppose. and he's so cute im gonna melt just looK AT THIS 

SHUt UP, IM GONNA CRY

OH MY GODDDD he ate like ice and gum and all that, and Dohye assumed it was bc of the more spicy food and got rl worried, but he was just trying to get the smell out of his breath bc he wanted to kiss him ukhsdjs HOW CAN YOU BE SO CUTE HELLLOOOOOOOOO

look at them. LOOK AT mY BABIESSSS

how am i ever gonna care about the main couple again aww he-he wanted to go to the same highschool as him :((( im sad bc i know its not gonna happennnnnn

[mei: also at this point, you're literally never gonna care about them. i don't even know the main couple that well and i honestly don't care about them whatsoever.]

WAIT NO they're actually going to the same school awww ik it wont take long until sister fucks it up for them but for now theyre so sweet ohmygodddd

cant he move in with them, fuck his family honestly

dohye he's not a fucking pokemon iukhsdjs

oh. its. turning horny i am displeased with this development but i guess its natural for their relationship however COULD YOU DO IT AT HOME AND NOT IN SOME DUSTY SMALL ROOM how do ppl do this i like that the comments too are just "... is anyone still carng about the other girl?" sakjds

this is the best 3 panels in existence.

h-he just took your hand dohye idk what to tell you

[mei: "you blush at everything i do" god if that isn't me, idk what is]

awww its cute dohye is getting bonus points bc he invited Noah over while his mom wasnt home, they watched some sexual stuff and he DIDNT try to do anything what is this where can i get more of this

"well im not okay"

MY BABIESSSS 

they still didnt do much btw they're just kinda exploring and its honestly nice TvT I dont want this to ever endddd

[Dohye sees Noah’s sister and approaches her] N O

N OOOO

this is the starttttt of something.......... TERRIBLEEEE 

:((( babyyyy

I AM EMO

Noah was drugged im sure. hes having dreams and waking up in pain and the sister is asking doyhe over I DONT LIKE THISSSSSSS OH HE DECLINED

OKAY OKAY he saw him with her again but it was from behind and im not sure if it rly happened??? oh no this is terrible. Noah :((( poor child

i am so emo about this

[reminder he’s been abused TvT]

[the sister: “Don’t you want to know why?”]

i will. murder someone he called to ask her to delete his number btw what is this manwha but this is just gonna make it that more tragic when whatever happens that breaks them apart :(((

he's such a good bf but Noah just wont TELL him his side I'M SO SAD

I AM SO SAD

No

NO

It cant end im actually tearing up nooo you were so cuteeee and happpyyy

[*sister is telling dohye to come to the gym hall*]

what else is she gonna do she already teared [current tori: ahem... T O R E] them apart THAT'S NOT DOYhE. THATS NEVER HIM. OH MY GOD. is it a look alike??? damn, she's dedicated to just. ruining it, huh

I’M

I’M SO SAD

now he's switching SCHOOLS NO NOOOOO how will i ever find happiness againnnn NO they're misunderstanding further they're not talking properly i mean i get it but oh my god

I'M :((( 

NO NOOOO pls make up in the future at least omg he tried to clear it up tooo ahhh i dont even have hopes for them getting back together but i just i want them to clear it up im crying first manwha to make me cry and it's this dumpster fire ahaha maybe a little too bc it kinda hit a little close to home i guess but goddamnn ittttt they were so cuteee and so happy and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OH NO. Noahs getting drugged and assaulted. And he's realizing it happened before, he just forgot. I am. so sad it's not horny drawn either which i appreciate but MY HEART NO

N O DONT YOU DARE MAKE THIS WORSE

Im. gonna cry more 

Doyhe kept an eye on him im so emo :(( but he thought he was doing well enough and gave up.... Im im so sad no i want you to make up and get back together its all just a stupid........... MEHHHH will i ever find sth like this flashback again

[mei: p-probably not, no]

i am so devasted i dont even wanna go back to the main couple just fucking. i want this relationship back :(((( but i guess the investigation might end up somewhere so hhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhh the baker manwha had a similar flashback feeling so. i just gotta find more of that haha

BUT THIS WAS SO SAD??? im so emo

[Dohye got kidnapped // the flashback commentary stops here but I think my descend into madness is pretty funny too]

OH YEAH THAT HAPPENED. THE FLASHBACK WAS SO LONG I FORGOT. NOOOO SAVE HIM. JESUS CHRIST PLS JUST ONE GOOD THING

its. actually rly smart to have another, more focused on them flashback, before the arc where he gets kidnapped by the rapist murder household so. good job. from a meta perspective but also NO but also. maybe theres hope for them making up at least after all :(((

[main couple kissing] this is. very weird now. but im glad he has someone, he deserves it but dohyeeeee

and switching to sex, YET AGAIN now i wanna see this EVEN LESS THAN I DID BEFOREEEE it's even.... a threesome now with one of the other characters why are you like this why can't you be. like in the flashback i am so upset HAHHHHH WHEEEZEEEE

I am just stop fucking jesus christ PLEASE I DONT WANNA SEE IT ANYMOREEEEE

im just stop the horny pls just tell me who that new guy is and why doyhe likes him so much

[mei: this manwha is a fucking mess but at least we got your lovely commentary out of it]

dhsuksj thanks i feel honored at least i got cute BL out of it before everything went [back] to shit

[mei: THAT TOO]

[...]

tbh im getting kinda mad about doyhe... i dont... feel like he'd just fall instantly for a guy who looks like Noah... but eh not my character

i just want closure for dohye at this point, fuck everything else ... not literally pls theres already too much of that

pls get it together for like 1 chapter is the investigation even still happening i am so confused save dohye plEASE wait what i have less than 10 episodes left Dont tell me this shit isnt even wrapped up yet

[Dohye is having a breakdown over the Noah double not coming to see him anymore]

yeah i this... doesnt feel like Dohye... at all... Even when Noah was rejecting him he was just kind of... taking it with some humor and maybe he was a little desperate and risky sometimes but... oh well... i do want him to get better but... im having a hard time believeing this development??? he never seemed overly anxious or anything. but who knows what else they did to him. Sister can still go fuck off tho

[...]

i mean. i liked the flashbacks a lot honestly??? it stayed simple and focused on the dynamics and less trying to balance smut with murder plots

[dm partner: NO THAT'S WHAT I MEAN LIKE CLEARLY THE AUTHOR CAN MAKE A GOOD STORY SO I'M JUST... CONFUSED AS TO WHY THEY DIDN'T STICK WITH SOME SOFT, FLUFFY BL ROMANCE MANWHA AND DECIDED TO MAKE WHATEVER THIS IS INSTEAD ]

okay i dont care bc dohye is currently getting assaulted nobody asked for this why i just. this is terrible. he was... so sweet. he doesnt deserve this. nobody does of course but jesus christ pls someone save him at least its not horny visually, one saving grace

ah... the assult is back to being depicted horny-ly thank you for nothing

[... removed some general confusion about the plot]

YES. SOME SHIP FOOD.

i am. suffering i mean i cant stop but GOD

okay so apparantly. the sister. has just an arsenal of people who look like other people Dohye, then Noah... and even Noah's GF??? this is ridiculous??

one good message 

why 

did you feel the need to add that [actual tired rage]

im gonna die this manwha is gonna kill me im laughing but im suffering oh hes arrested great and thats the end and the last update was in january of this year

why AS IN NOAH IS ARRESTED nobody who actually did anything is arrested What is this why is this AHHH I at least wanted the complete-ness of finishing this but now I'M JUST SUFFERING

[ mei: I MEAN TO BE FAIR I'D BE SUFFERING TOO BC JUST... WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE?? MANY QUESTIONS?? AND MANY CONCERNS BC THIS MANWHA IS JUST... AN EXPERIENCE ]

its an experience allright WELL

_______________

yup that’s it.

in my head, in a twist of events Dohye and Noah make up and are actual endgame. Something like that must exist out there but I won’t ask because it’d destroy the surprise and ruin the point.

That’s it.

Have a nice day.

[heartlandrock]

Tagged by @marklanegan thank you so much! ☺️

1. Why did you choose your url?

Was born in 97 so my soul apparently has an attachment to 90s pop culture and flannel and daisy patterns were all the rage

2. Any side blogs? If you have them, name them and why you have them.

No, this is pretty much a hodgepodge of things already. I post what I like and my interests have been fairly consistent anyway.

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

It'll be 5 years in August

4. Do you have a queue tag?

Nope can't say that I do

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

Wanted to see what Tumblr was all about and now I can't leave

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

Allison is the most relatable and interesting character in The Breakfast Club to me and if I could dress like her, I would

7. Why did you choose your header?

Flowers and angels are a nice aesthetic and it goes well with my color scheme

8. What's your post with the most notes?

My "American Pie is We Didn't Start The Fire for intellectuals" post lmao

9. How many mutuals do you have?

Several

10. How many followers do you have?

Exactly 240

11. How many people do you follow?

118 but a lot of them are inactive now so I need to find more

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

Of course. Isn't that what this site is made for?

13. How often do you use Tumblr on here each day?

I'm on it quite a bit but I'll skip a day or two and not look at it

14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won?

No, my interactions on here have been pretty nice and civil and are mostly with mutuals and followers 😀

15. How do you feel about "u need to reblog this" posts?

I do not see it 🙈

16. Do you like tag games?

Sure, I appreciate being included! It's always a nice feeling. I'm not that great at tagging other people though so when I complete these, it's often open to whoever wants to participate.

17. Do you like ask games?

Yeah, they're pretty fun to answer and see other people's responses, but it's sometimes difficult to reply depending on the ask

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

@princessmo because she’s one of the funniest people on here

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

No, but I admire their dedication to whatever they're interested in and like their various themes. They're all really cool! 😎

Tagging: @keepit-pg @cantblamethestarsinjuly @lokiisvetterthanthor @andnowthestoryofeddierebel (*don't have to participate if you don't want!*)

[rogue-barnes-16]

BLUE

Summary: Y/n tries to bury her feelings after making a terribly bad decision about Bucky that destroyed what they had. It backfires in the worst possible way.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Genre: 90% angst

Tags:

Submitted for @blushycarol's writing challenge.

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @1a-girl-has-no-name1 @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125 @unlikelygalaxygiver

Warnings: language, makeout, implicit sex, feels™️

A/N: this is my prompted songfic for blushycarol's writing challenge! It took a turn like, ngl I did whatever the fuck I wanted with the song but it fits so there it goes, enjoy <3.

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

We've broken up and now I regret it

I said goodbye when I shouldn't have said it

"I fixed your boy. He's awake now." She spoke through the wakandan device. "Figured you'd want to see him."

Yeah, it was the princess of Wakanda herself who decided to call me —not even Steve, me— to inform me that the man I loved had finally awaken.

A couple of hours later, T'challa did with Steve the same thing Shuri had done with me, and soon we both left to reach the hidden city.

We met with Bucky.

Steve cried a couple of times, Bucky laughed in a few occasions, and I stayed rather quiet almost the entire time.

After two days, Steve left with the promise of coming back, but I stayed just because I had missed him so much, I didn't feel like saying goodbye just yet.

Despite this, we didn't talk much in those months I had stayed with him. It wasn't like we spoke a lot before, but now it felt different.

I knew why; it was because of me. Because maybe, just maybe, I was terrified that this new version of him, that healed James Barnes, wouldn't love me like his broken self did.

We had reached a point where I didn't know what we were any longer, and I was 100% sure that the feeling was mutual, we were just too scared to talk it out.

I took the easiest, most despicable way and, one morning, I left Wakanda, hoping to spare my heart and breaking his in the process.

A week later I was back, suited up and ready to fight the deadliest threat I would have faced in my whole life.

I survived.

Bucky didn't, and the only thing I could think was that had lost him, and the last words I said to him were 'this is over, I'm leaving you'.

Five Years Later

I even cried but I never meant it

And I don't know why but I can't forget it, forget it

When Fury paired us to go on a mission, I thought it would be easy due to the action, but it turned out to be a watch, and suddenly everything was ten times more difficult.

We had been in silence for at least a long, tedious hour, in a dark room with two windows, waiting for the target to appear, when Bucky spoke.

"Is it true?" I, pretty much confused, turned my head to him, whose eyes were already on me, his back reclined against the wall before me. "that you cried for me." his voice held kinds of fear that I had never heard in him.

"who told you that?" I inquired, starting to get anxious because no one was supposed to know that; no one had seen me breaking down every night for months because of him.

"Steve." he replied, digging his eyes on mines. "Did you?"

My fight or flight instincts made me shook my head no as an initial response, only because of the sudden panic flooding through my veins. "I mean yes- I- no I mean I- I cried for everyone and I just... it-" I attempted to calm myself down before letting out a propper sentence. "it meant nothing. I did, I just didn't... I felt guilty" I finished, my heart racing and pounding as if it would leave my chest. "for everyone I couldn't save."

He didn't say anything else, nor did I.

After our short chat everything was even worse, because I was no longer focused now that the sorrow I had felt those nights was replaying in my head non-stop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gimme love, gimme dreams, gimme a good self esteem

We remained distant, but at some point, Bucky started to compliment me, to make nice comments, to give me quick smiles and fast 'thank you's, and I would be lying if I said I didn't treasure them.

"You look... great." He'd shyly say whenever I got dolled up.

"Great shot" he would state breathless, passing me by during a mission, to which I would just nod. "Thank for having my back."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Your hair..." he once trailed off with a frown, resting his elbows over the counter.

"yeah, I needed a change." for a second, the part of me I had hidden crawled up to the surface and I asked. "You... Don't like it?"

"No- I mean yes- I- I really like it." he assured me with bittersweet smile. "It fits you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gimme good and pure, what you waiting for?

Gimme everything, all your heart can bring

Something good and true

I don't wanna feel blue anymore

"Barnes and you." Sharon spoke, closing the pantry's door behind her.

"what?" I questioned, turning to her for a moment while she raised her eyebrow at me.

"what are you playing at, Y/n?" she asked, a bit of concern being noticeable in her tone.

We weren't close. No, no we hadn't grown closer, but I sometimes would sit right besides him during Saturday's take-out night, near enough for our thighs to brush.

I'd let him play with my hair from time to time, I'd allow him to come to my room in the middle of the night to lay with me after a nightmare here and there.

I wouldn't complain when his hands held my cheeks in the aftermath of a rough mission, his eyes scanning me with worry and sorrow while pain would most likely be rushing through my body.

I wouldn't scold him if he ever picked me up to carry me into the medical wing after I had gotten injured, even if I could walk. Maybe I would even cling on his neck, feeling his heartbeat fastening.

"We're not playing." I replied noctant, pouring four glasses of wine for all of us.

"Y/n" I sighed. "why are you doin' this to him? You're gonna hurt him and you."

"I don't wanna feel blue." I confessed in a mutter. "no one'll get hurt, I just... Need what he gives me."

Sharon stared at me dumbfounded for a couple of seconds before shaking her head and leaving, mumbling something my ears couldn't catch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gimme one more night

One last goodbye

Let's do it one last time

Let's do it one last time

One more time

It was during Sam's birthday that I gathered the courage to do what I, deep inside, so badly wanted to do.

I saw my opportunity the moment Bucky approached the barcounter to grab some random drink.

I left mine on a shelf and rushed to reach him and I passed by him, but on my way out of the room, my hand discreetly found his and tugged him with me.

I didn't stop until we reached the nearest room , which happened to be the bathroom.

Without a word, I got him inside and closed the door, backing against it and, with his fingers still intertwined with mine, I pulled Bucky into a kiss.

He stopped after a few seconds. His eyes were sad as he gazed into mines, and I felt a lump in my throat.

"I..." my attempt to speak triggered my tears, and his response was to cares my cheeks and peck my lips.

The terror I had felt 5 years ago of me not being good enough for him to love me anymore came back. My heart pounded against my chest, the voice in the back of my head simultaneously begging me to stop.

"I need this... Just..." I fisted his shirt, bringing him closer to me. "one last time... Please I-"

"are you drunk right now?" he questioned, putting a strand of hair away from my face.

"No." I half lied, pulling him to me into a needy kiss which quickly escalated.

No, I don't love you

No, I don't care

I just want to be held when I'm scared

And all I want is one night with you

Just 'cause I'm selfish

I know it's true

What had happened in the party was never spoken about, nor mentioned.

We had swept it under the rug for both of our sakes —mostly for mine.

We didn't sleep together again, but in very few occasions, I would end up tugging him to some dark place where we were alone and make out until I was out of breath.

Each time that happened, for some reason I didn't understand, Bucky always whispered me the same question.

"Do you love me?"

To which I answered a breathless, painful 'no' that would most likely end up crushing my heart because of the heavy weight that lie carried.

My nightmares at some point had gotten worse, now involving Bucky getting hurt almost every time, so, whenever I woke up in cold sweat with tears in my eyes, gasping his name, I would make my way to his room and lay down besides him.

He would wake up the moment my body touched the mattress, and, as soon as I was under the sheets, he would pull me into his chest with his arms around me, asking me the same question every time.

"what was it about?"

To which I selfishly responded with:

"don't wanna talk. Just hold me, please."

I'm sick of looking after you

I need a man to hold on to

I'm bored of everything we do

But I just keep coming back to you

The first time I snuck under his sheets I promised myself it would be just that one night, that I would allow myself to be so fucking selfish just for one night, but his embrace was so comforting, so welcoming, and his heartbeat and breathing were so soothing, that I ended up being selfish every damn time.

One night, instead of reaching his room scared and trembling, I reached it with anger and frustration taking over my body.

I shut the door loud enough to make him sit upright, staring at me concerned.

"I'm fucking tired of this" I growled. "I'm tired of this nightmares, I'm sick of seeing you dying, I'm fucking done with looking after you in every mission more than I look after myself" I reached a point where I was close to shout as I stepped to the bed. "I want this to fucking stop!"

"Y/n-"

"I can't keep up with this anymore, I'm going crazy because it's ALWAYS THE SAME SHIT."

"You're tired." he stated, climbing off the bed to hesitantly step to me. "You need to sleep."

"I need to fucking get this off my damn chest!" a choked sob escaped my lips. "I keep coming back to you and I hate myself because of this! Because this is my fault!"

"Y/n please..." he wrapped his arms around me and I fought him a little before giving in, breaking down to tears the moment he kissed my temple.

"I was so scared of you not loving me anymore that I fucked everything up" I managed to explain in a vague mumble between sobs. "You're okay and I was fucking scared of not being good enough- I still am... I just keep making it worse!"

He stroke my hair and pulled me even closer. "Doll..."

The door few open and I heard Sam's voice behind me. "What was that? Are you-" Bucky shook my head over me and signaled Sam to leave.

"I love you so much please I'm sorry" he pulled me to the bed without letting go of me and threw the blanket over us.

"I know you do." he assured me intertwining his fingers with mines and placing a kiss on my knuckles. "I love you. I always will." he whispered soothingly.

Gimme everything, all your heart can bring

Something good and true

I don't wanna feel blue anymore 

[whumpster-fire]

More on Redemption Arcs

So, there’s something else I want to say about Enemies to Lovers / Enemies to Friends / in general redemption arcs, and in particular those where a character who’s previously been hurt by a villain or their associates is now in a caretaking role for that villain.

Obligatory no one is obligated to forgive someone who’s caused them trauma, or go through the emotional labor of supporting them, or ever interact with them again. But, IMO, it works better if you approach it from the perspective of: “Okay, so why would the traumatized character want to interact with the source of that trauma?” Think about something positive they’re getting from this relationship, from the character’s perspective, and/or think about it in terms of what would establish a bond between them that would cause character A to not want to say: “Okay I don’t care if they’re reformed / reformable, they’re someone else’s problem.”

And obviously there’s better and worse, or at least healthier and less healthy reasons for this. One good one is to have circumstances / the plot force them to grit their teeth and work together, causing bonding through alliance (I dunno the actual term), and at some point during or after this they go “Oh shit we’re actually friends now” (CoughZukoCough). Another of my favorites is to have characters bonding through a shared trauma. This could be a “we’re all in the same boat” situation like I mentioned above but instead of succeeding together they suffer together, or it could be through similar circumstances but not actually the same event, or it could be they’re both abused and traumatized by the same Even Worse Villain and the subordinate villain ends up standing up to their abuser and helping the hero. (E.g. @wildfaewhump’s Iesin and Talvos storyline here on Tumblr, go check it out).

Here’s a couple of case studies of this with redemption arcs I’ve written avoided writing like 90% of the actual recovery phase of, which I’m putting below a Keep Reading both because we’re several paragraphs in now and because one of them spoils the canon material, and also yeah I’m being obnoxious writing long-winded essays about my own fics even if it is my blog. Fics are linked to Ao3, check the tags and summaries on there for trigger warnings and read at your own risk.

Case One: Resurrection x And x Reconciliation

This is in the Hunter X Hunter fandom, and it’s a Gon & Neferpitou friendship, which if you’re familiar with the canon material sounds like the worst fucking idea ever for an enemies to friends arc. Long story short Pitou killed (and also reanimated as a corpse puppet) someone close to Gon, and the trauma of this utterly broke him, to the point of being so obsessed with revenge that he pushed away and hurt his closest friend, took an innocent person hostage for leverage, and basically snapped and went to utterly insane lengths to kill Pitou that it would have caused him a slow, horribly painful death if it weren’t for circumstances.

Okay, but long story short, the person whose death set this all off later turned out to have somehow reincarnated himself into another body, and Gon already processes stuff in really weird ways, so he was now left struggling to process the delayed realization of all the fuckups and reckless and harmful things he’d done, and the trauma of the actual “fight” against Pitou, and meanwhile Pitou got the fun experience of experiencing grief and loss and a near-death (technically actual death) experience for the first time and starting to process that she’d caused that kind of trauma for hundreds of thousands of fully sentient people. And also it turned out that they both sacrificed their lives to kill each other and accomplished absolutely nothing in the process, because the person Gon was trying to avenge turned out to be still alive, and the person Pitou was trying to protected turned out to already be fatally injured.

So this is kind of the exception that proves the rule because Gon and Pitou’s friendship is absolutely 100% born of shared trauma, it’s just that a major part of said trauma was mutually inflicted on each other, and supporting each other kind of helps them heal. This isn’t necessarily actually psychologically healthy or a good idea, but it’s pretty well established in canon that the only thing worse than every single adult in the setting’s track record at supporting people during mental health crises is their track record at stopping Gon from doing whatever the fuck he decides to do, and no one wants to deal with Pitou either.

Case Two: La Resistance / Fresh Ink

This is in, uhh, the Warner Bros Cartoon Universe fandom / Who Framed Roger Rabbit fandom, but by nature the canon material doesn’t have much of a plot for the former and the later is really just the setting. Lemme try and summarize this: in the final battle against the terrorist group that was creating Toons (living cartoon characters with reality warping powers) as living weapons in an attempted genocide against other Toons, the only two surviving toons on the villain’s side, Wendy Weasel and Riley Raccoon, were semi-adopted by some of the protagonists: Yakko, Wakko, and Dot Warner, and Slappy Squirrel. At first mostly Wendy because in the immediate aftermath of the battle Riley was in the ICU.

Okay, why did they spend their time dealing with her? This one’s different because Wendy herself didn’t really cause that much in the way of direct trauma to the characters who ended up supporting her - the ones she really hurt didn’t have much to do with her - however she’s just a fucking chore to try to get along with because she’s passive-aggressive, aggressive-aggressive, destructive-aggressive, and her main defense mechanism is to intensify these traits even further so she was just a hostile brat most of the time.

Well, this starts as a “Forced together by external circumstances” plot, of a sort: Wendy ended up as a prisoner after the battle - she defected, but never actually surrendered because she knocked herself unconscious while killing the main villain. The FBI did not want to have to deal with a prisoner who could teleport through walls, pull weapons and tools out of thin air, Jedi Mind Trick guards, etc. etc. etc, and the Warner Siblings just happened to be in a possession of a tailor-made prison designed to hold creatures like her (originally meant to contain them, they broke out but refused to move out) and were among the like 5-10 people on the planet who could actually fight her, so the Feds basically went: “Your problem now,” or just as accurately, the Warners and Slappy were not letting what was obviously an indoctrinated child soldier who defected and helped them get deemed “Too dangerous to let live since we can’t keep her contained long enough to have a trial” as a matter of principle.

But reason B, especially as they interacted with Wendy, is that the Warners and to a lesser extent Slappy knew what it was like to be drawn into existence and surrounded by people who hated them, feared them, or at least didn’t respect them. Again there was an attempt to seal the Warners permanently in an inescapable prison, and this was before a method of actually killing Toons was invented so they’re pretty sure the humans would have preferred to straight-up murder them for being too powerful and out of control... which was also the exact same ideology held by Wendy’s creators. And they also really empathized with the strong “sibling” bond she had with Riley (not actually supposed to be siblings but drawn by the same animator so sort of siblings and they just kinda decided they were) because it reminded them of themselves as well. This is self-explanatory with the Warners, with Slappy, in the fic she and Screwy Squirrel were siblings, and “Gee wouldn’t it be terrifying if a character as chaotic and sadistic as Screwy Squirrel was a villain was literally the starting point for Wendy’s character concept.

Also reason C is “Obnoxious child using passive-aggressiveness to mask trauma, anger, and need for love and attention” fit right in in the WB Studio Water Tower.

Anyway tl;dr that’s another example of a potential motive behind the caretakers in a redemption arc: if the characters sort of identify with the villain due to similar backgrounds to the point where they sort of go: “That could’ve been me in different circumstances.”

[theharellan]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm. tagged by: stolen from @dansiere tagging: @ghiassan, @deathsreflection, @altuspavus, @windrunnerrs (velanna), @hopewrought, @willbeshot, @seahaloed (iron bull), @asterfed​ (noctis), @ anyone who wants to steal it! also multis feel free to choose a different character

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated (i’m open to roleplaying with non-dragon age characters, and have AUs for other fandoms)

Is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO. solas is both wildly popular and wildly hated. he’s been more consistently popular than the controversial women in the series, like sera or vivienne, who have only recently begun to get to the point where their tags are less vitriolic (although i’m sure it’s still out there), but there’s still a sizable hatedom that can’t have his name breathed in their vicinity w/o them talking abt how much they hate him. even if you’re currently cosplaying him!

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK. again, you have ppl who are super into him and ppl who think he’s ugly. my personal opinion is that i think he’s weirdly pretty, and wish ppl would commit more to his unconventional features rather than try to chisel him into sb more traditionally attractive and that ppl who don’t find him attractive would maybe chill w/ calling him ugly. find him unattractive by all means, but lets embrace the fact that inquisition let their love interests have skin flaws etc and accept that some won’t be our cups of tea.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK. its hard to deny at this point tbh.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO / IDK. frustrating as the hate in the tags he has enough fans that i couldnt say he’s underrated w/ a straight face.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO. he’s the reason the game starts with a bang and not the inevitable dissolution of the conclave b/c the sides are disparate.

Were they relevant for the main character? YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG. regardless of solas’ relationship with the inquisitor, there are parallels and contrasts in their stories and he also is the reason they survive inquisition.

Are they widely known in their world? YES / NO. fen’harel is well-known and revered, if feared, among the dalish, yet at the same time he’s not remembered for a lot besides locking the gods away-- and the context of that decision has also been lost. as solas he’s relatively unknown until inquisition and especially trespasser.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. again, polarising!! he has loyal agents and people are willing to speak well of him despite everything, including his enemies sometimes (depending mostly on the inquisitor). 

How strictly do you follow canon?  — generally i try to have a canon basis for my interpretation, even if i interpret the text differently than the author.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  solas is an immortal who is simultaneously jaded and very much invested in the small moments of life. far from being weary of the day-to-day lives of ordinary people, it is systems and orders he is most tired of. he walks an interesting line that feels far less misanthropic than other immortal characters i’ve experienced, yet still he’s quite cynical. as a character who has fought against religious based tyranny before, but in a completely different era, he is in a unique position where what he sees around him is both horrifyingly familiar and yet completely new. it allows an exploration of the wrongs of thedas’ society from an outsider’s perspective. his motivations are complex and multifaceted, often condemnable and yet also understandable. his character arc in inquisition (if befriended, or regardless in the case of my solas) takes him from a dispassionate, disconnected antagonist to someone deeply invested in the people of thedas, deeply conflicted and actively hoping he will be proven wrong again. i think his story is a testament to human (or elven, or dwarven, or-) connection and how even when we resist we can’t resist creating bonds with the people in our lives. i personally see this bond going beyond the inquisitor hence why i play low-approval solas as conflicted as high-approval, if not when it comes to the inquisitor.

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  —  solas is selfish and motivated solely by revenge, he’s clinging to a past that clearly no longer exists, if you ignore all the people from it who are still alive. he’s totally unaware of all his flaws and never owns up to any mistakes ever. no, i haven’t listened to a single word solas has said in my life why do you ask. he’s also critical of my faves which means he’s #cancelled, there is clearly no validity to what he’s saying. ksjdf no but in all seriousness i think a lot of reasons ppl don’t find solas interesting are just... weird readings of his character that sometimes have no basis in the text of inquisition, but also there are plenty of perfectly valid reasons to not find him interesting. usually those ppl don’t like... talk abt how much they don’t find him interesting constantly tho. they just chill and aren’t invested in this particular villain. for one thing i think the game missed out on opportunities for exploring how someone who may not have even had a body at the beginning of his existence would feel about gender and sexuality, so making him presumably straight and cis was a boring choice. i also think that the dragon age games being very protagonist-centric hurts solas’ character, there’s no real reason why the inquisitor is the only one who can throw his plans into question but making the player the center of the universe means he’s not allowed to change due to the effects of other companions or NPCs. thank god this is rp and i do what i want.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  i have a history degree so when the inquisition companions were being teased, solas describing bias in primary sources from the memories he’s seen got me interested in him. but my first playthrough i didn’t actually take him with me all too often, i think my main party was dorian-blackwall-varric. i liked him, and i think he or dorian were my first friends in skyhold, but my initial interest was in other characters. between his dialogue that appealed to the historian in me tho and how his spirit opinions sort of turned everything i’d felt about spirits in the last two games on its head, i started vibing with him more the farther i went in. like merrill set me up for the “spirits are people” thing and solas hit it out of the park. then temple of mythal happened, and i did bring solas with me there. i found his dialogue fascinating and also suspicious, i’d just finished masked empire like the day before da:i came out so i definitely thought solas was an ancient elf in the same vein as felassan. it was after temple of mythal that i actually decided to make his blog, although like as one idk linchpin to cement my status as solas trash... i was hit BAD by the banter bug on my first playthrough, probably got like a dozen banters total. but then at some point late in the game i took solas to the forbidden oasis and he wouldn’t stop talking to people, and i really loved his banter with the rest of my party at the time.

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  replaying inquisition, new DA content when the bioware gods deign to grant us a lifeline, but the biggest thing is my rp partners. i wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for the people i write with, new and old. my activity of late hasn’t been the best, work and the summer heat has really been sapping me of energy, and does even during years when we aren’t going through a pandemic. but it’s the thought of my rp partners and love of solas that keeps me coming back.

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO / I SINCERELY HOPE I DO? i have my doubts sometimes, but i think i do ok.

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO / SORT OF? there is no headcanon too small for me.

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO. but not lately * gestures to the low activity * i’ve been in this cycle where i get anxious abt late replies, so prioritise them, then burn myself out and can’t write the fics i want. i’ve had two i’ve been DYING to write tho i just... need to find the space in my brain to let myself.

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO. i mean it depends on the day. if i work closing shifts at my store it gets very quiet and boring around 8:30 so i spent the next 90 minutes thinking about character stuff.

Are you confident in your portrayal?  YES / NO / SORT OF? 

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO / SOMETIMES. 

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO / SORTA.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  i’m going to say ‘no’ because like, i don’t ask for criticism. this is a hobby based on my interpretation of a character, if you think i write solas too soft then you’re welcome to think that, but i’m happy with the balance i’ve struck with his internal versus external behaviour and how he changes based upon who he’s speaking to. if you think i’m erasing straight people by making solas pan then ksjdfs. ok.

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  —  yes!!! even if they retread ground already trodden, a) my interpretation may have adjusted since the last time i played or b) a reminder is nice. if it’s new stuff then it’s fun to think about.

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  it’d depend on why they disagree. if they just disagree on a subjective opinion about what i took from a certain line, then they’re welcome to their opinion but i don’t necessarily care to hear it. if it is unintentionally hurtful then i would like to know. although rather than a comment i’d rather a non-anonymous message.

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —  same as the above.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  if they’re vocal about it i typically just unfollow / softblock if i was following in the first place. people can feel how they want about solas, but i’ve found over the years that if people really hate solas ooc it can often bleed into their ic interactions. it’s really weird seeing your character being brought up repeatedly in threads with others specifically to dunk on, for no reason other than i guess solas is living rent free in their heads, so at least we have that in common. but anyway unfollowing is just the best choice to avoid getting kinda pressed if i’m having a bad day.

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  —  roleplay is the wild west of writing, so i think it’d depend on what the error was. coming at me like “you shouldn’t start a sentence with a preposition” would get a laugh, but i don’t edit my replies much if at all and mistakes will 100% happen. pointing out typos is chill so long as you do it politely.

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  it depends! i’ve learned that being too easy going actually just means i’m subjecting myself to negative emotions to please people. so i’ve gotten less easy going as the years go by. how does one define “easy going” anyway? does asking that question mean i am objectively not easy going? the longer this thought goes on the more the answer seems to be “probably not,” but i like to think it could be a lot worse.