#predicting that the notes on this will be annoyin

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

At a certain point blaming the school system for failing to teach you every fact becomes an excuse to absolve yourself from learning on your own time as an adult. Maybe you had bad teachers and curricula, maybe you never did the assigned reading, maybe you were taught propaganda, but it’s okay to start now. It’s okay to learn geography from online games. It’s okay to get entry level books from the library on a subject. It’s okay to explore Wikipedia and other reputable websites as a start. You can learn as an adult. You should continue learning as an adult.

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS MORE,BLOOD Animate Tokuten Drama CD “Body Swap Panic ~Silent Squad Version~”

Original title: 入れ替わり騒動 ～寡黙組編～

Source: DIABOLIK LOVERS Imajin Webshop Tokuten Drama CD “Body Swap Panic ~Silent Squad ver.~” [CD not owned by me]

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Toriumi Kousuke, Katsuyuki Konishi & Takashi Kindou

Translator’s note: My hopes were up high for this CD because I had already translated the triplets ver. one and absolutely loved the chaos in that one. Thankfully, this CD did not disappoint either because it is equally funny. While the triplets were actually somewhat okay with the swap at first, these three characters don’t exactly like each other so they were not too stoked about being in each other’s bodies. xD Also Reiji’s VA talking like Subaru just had me crack up every time he opened his mouth. 

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

Shuu: Nn...Mm...

Subaru: Che...Fuckin’ annoyin’...I can hear the damn music... (1) This is livin’ room, remember!? Everyone’s free to be here, so do you really think you’ll get away with puttin’ me in a bad mood? ...Say, you feel the same way, don’t you?

You shake your head.

Subaru: Che...I see.

The classic music continues playing. 

*Rustle rustle*

Subaru: Argh...Make it stop! ...Oi! ...Oi!! Shuu!! 

Shuu: Zzー...

Subaru: You bastard...You’re ignorin’ me on purpose, aren’t you!?

Subaru jumps up from his seat.

*THUD*

Reiji steps into the living room.

Reiji: Oh? Subaru and...Seems like that deadbeat is present as well. Good grief. Holiday or not, I wish you would not loaf around in the living room all day.

Subaru: Haah!? I’m not loafin’ ‘round...!! Say that to the lazy ass over there!

Reiji: Please do not shout at me like that. I am already not in the best of moods because of a certain someone being in my field of view. ...Shuu! Shuu!!

Shuu: ...Nn...Nnh...

Reiji: Haah...Oh, you happen to be here as well, I see. Yes, I am talking to you. This is an order. Make sure that good-for-nothing leaves this room as soon as possible.

You shake your head.

Reiji: Eh? You cannot? You are nothing but prey, yet you will give up before even trying and defy your Master? Good grief...Hurry up and do something about him! If you do a fine job, I shall reward you. Besides, when you are the one asking, that deadbeat might just be willing to listen.

You walk over to Shuu, shaking his shoulder.

*Rustle rustle*

Shuu: ...Nn? ...Oh, it’s you? What do you want? Honestly, you really don’t have a single shred of delicacy or ability to read the room, do you? I assume you came well prepared considering you interrupted my Beethoven. 

You ask him if he could listen to music in his room instead. 

Shuu: ...Aah? If I’m going to complain about that, I should leave the living room? Hah. And why exactly do I need to have you tell me that? If you want me to move, then carry me. If you do that, I wouldn’t mind sucking your blood in return?

Reiji: Haah...What are you saying? Just as I predicted...

Shuu: ...Reiji. 

Subaru: Che...! This turn of events was so obvious, there’s nothin’ fun ‘bout it. Geez. Well, at least the music has stopped for now.

Shuu: Haah...Two pests at once...Oh well, whatever. Oi, you. Let’s go to my room already. I’ll savor your blood thoroughly.

Reiji: Stop. Please leave this room alone, leaving her behind. 

Shuu: Haah...?

Reiji: She does not only belong to you.

Subaru: Actually, if you’re gonna say that, then she’s mine. I can’t let you guys do with her as you please. Don’t fuck with me.

Shuu: She approached me, remember? So it should be obvious who she views as her Master, no?

Reiji: Hmph. That is because I ordered her to do so. In other words, you know what that alludes to, right?

Subaru: Tsk. Go ahead and fight it out amongst you two. ...Oi! You don’t think of either of these selfish bastards as your Master either, do you? Right?

Shuu: ...

Reiji: Hmph.

Subaru: Keh!

Shuu: Well...We can say whatever we want, in the end, the final decision lies with her.

Reiji: You seem rather confident. I am simply appalled. You sure talk big for a deadbeat who does not do nor accomplish anything in his life.

Subaru: Say...You’ll choose me, right!?

*THUD*

Shuu: The way you rely on violence to try and sway a woman’s opinion like that really shows that you’re still a child.

Subaru: Aah!? You wanna throw some fists, huh!?

*Rustle*

Reiji: Cut it out. If he goes on a rampage, the house will actually fall apart. I pray that you at least have some braincells left to realize who will be the one paying for the restorations afterwards.

Subaru: Hah! This stupid manor should just flatten with the ground already!

*THUD*

Reji: Subaru...! Seems like you will have to learn the hard way.

*Smack*

Subaru: Heh. Whatcha gonna do with that whip? ...Oi, Shuu! This jerk’s tryin’ to use violence to get people to bend to his will too! In short, he’s a child, right?

Shuu: Haah...This sucks. Stay out of this, brat.

Subaru: Haah!? SAY THAT ONE MORE TIME!?

*THUD*

Reiji: Wai...!

*Rumble rumble*

Shuu: Haah? The wall’s crumbling for reaーー

Subaru: Uwah...!?

*CRASH*

*SHATTER*

*THUD*

--> This is where the ‘body/personality swap’ happens. Shuu is now in Subaru’s body, Subaru is in Reiji’s body and Reiji  is in Shuu’s body. For my translations, I will put the name of whoever is inside the body in between parathesis to make it less confusing.

Shuu (Reiji): Cough...That’s exactly why I kept on warning you about destroying the house, good grief...!

Reiji (Subaru): Fuck off...Hah! Not my fault this house’s an old wreck. One lil’ kick and it falls apart.

Subaru (Shuu): Haah...This is exhausting. I’m done with this. ...Hm? Aah? ...What’s going on...?

Shuu (Reiji): Why am I sitting right in front of myself? ...Also this voice?

Reiji (Subaru): ...Uwah!? W-Why the fuck am I wearin’ glasses!? 

Shuu (Reiji): ...! I would rather not believe this to be true, but could we have swapped bodies as a result of the earlier blow?

Subaru (Shuu): Oi, Reiji. Have you ever heard about Vampires having this kind of power?

Shuu (Reiji): I have not. If I did, I would have tested it out long ago. However...Having you ask me that question as Subaru is throwing me off. Ahー I feel disgusted...

Reiji (Subaru): Hearin’ Shuu talk quickly is disgustin’ too...The fuck’s goin’ on!? Oi, you! Do you have any idea what’s goin’ on...!?

Subaru (Shuu): No way you’d know, huh? ...Haah...That being said...Inside of me there’s Reiji. Inside of Reiji’s there Subaru. ...And I’m now in Subaru’s body. What a drag...

Shuu (Reiji): However, this is quite troublesome...Or rather, I do not enjoy this situation whatsoever. I cannot fantom anyone would want to become that deadbeat for their own enjoyment.

Reiji (Subaru): Second that! For one...These glasses or whatever...It makes the top of my nose itchy, it’s drivin’ me nuts, I want to just crush them!

Shuu (Reiji): Hold it! Do not break them!

Subaru (Shuu): Anyway...What are we gonna do? Is there a way to go back to normal? Haah...This really is a pain...

Shuu (Reiji): I suppose our only option is to experience a similar shock to the one from earlier. I really cannot get used to it...The combination of that appearance with that manner of speech...I would like to kindly ask you to refrain from acting or speaking crudely while you are in my body as well.

Subaru (Shuu): Ahー... Honestly, I don’t care anymore. I’m tired. I’ll leave it up to you two to do something about this. 

Shuu (Reiji): Hold it, Shuu! Do not fall asleep just yet!

Subaru (Shuu): Nn...Zzー...

Shuu (Reiji): Ugh...That good-for-nothing...!

Reiji (Subaru): Whatever. While Shuu is snoozin’ away, we can use it as an opportunity to use this bad boy...

*Rustle*

Shuu (Reiji): Where did you find that hammer?

Reiji (Subaru): Who cares? More importantly, you said that we need a similar impact to return to normal, right? Let’s test it on Mr. Sleepyhead over here!

Shuu (Reiji): Ah...I see. That might not be a bad idea.

Reiji (Subaru): That bein’ said...I’m kinda hesitant to beat up my own body. ...Aah!? The fuck’s your problem!?

You try and stop him.

Reiji (Subaru): Ah? You want me to drop the idea? ...Then do you have a plan to get us back to normal!? You can’t, can you!? In that case...Just watch there in silence!

Subaru (Shuu): ...Heh.

*THUD*

*Swoosh*

Shuu (Reiji): So speedy...! Oi, Shuu! Don’t dodge!

Subaru (Shuu): I didn’t...My body moved...instinctively...I see. My body is behaving like Subaru’s, huh?

Shuu (Reiji): In that case, I shall join in as well!

*Swoosh*

Subaru (Shuu): Anyway Reiji...Where did you get that hammer?

Shuu (Reiji): No point in telling you! 

*THUD*

Subaru (Shuu): ...That was close! Fuck...What a pain...

Shuu (Reiji): Brace yourself!

*THUD*

Subaru (Shuu): ...Woah!?

*THUD*

Reiji (Subaru): ...Uwah!? ...That was close! The fuck, boomer!? Hit up the gym a lil more...! (2)

*Swoosh*

*THUD*

Shuu (Reiji): A boomer, you say? You just called me...a BOOMER, did you not!?

*THUD*

*CRASH*

Subaru (Shuu): Che...Fuck...At this rate, this will never get resolved. Oi, how about you don’t just watch but help out? Catch those two.

*Swoosh*

*THUD*

Shuu (Reiji): That is my line! Don’t just stand there dumbfounded, but lend me a hand here!

*Swoosh*

*CRASH*

Reiji (Subaru): ...Ugh! You belong to me, so you should help me out! ...Wait!? Where are you goin’...!? Don’t run!

Shuu (Reiji): Subaru! You leave yourself wide open!

*THUD*

Reiji (Subaru): Heh. Easy. You really think I’d be done in by some boomer swinging a hammer around?

Subaru (Shuu): Haah...Shit...The whole house’s a mess...

*THUD THUD*

Subaru (Shuu): What are we gonna do about this...? Will I get sent to the North Pole by the Old Man again...?

*THUD THUD*

Subaru (Shuu): Let me tell you just in case, but you’re all equally responsible. ...Of course, that applies to you trying to sneak away over there as well.

You flinch.

Shuu (Reiji): Tch. Fuck...I won’t let that happen!

Reiji (Subaru): LIKE I GIVE A FLYING FUCK...!!

ーー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) 音漏れ or ‘oto-more’ means that you can hear the music from someone’s earphones because they put the volume too high.

(2) Literally he says ‘train your body a little more’, implying that Subaru was having trouble dodging the incoming attacks while in Reiji’s body because he is not as flexible.