#practically every time i bitch about it i bring up the fact that Yes the perspective of being able to be your worst self with no fear that

[here-there-were-dragons]

my mother is absolutely convinced of some nonsense conspiracy theory that (in her words) "originally humanity lived in peaceful all-woman societies of goddess worshippers who took care of eachother and lived in harmony, while males were roving loners that had no society and never cooperated. that changed when the men banded together and overthrew the peaceful woman-dominated societies, and enslaved us all." and, according to her, this is proof that a woman-dominated world would be innately more peaceful, and that men are innately violent and evil and should be either barred from holding any legal power or leadership roles or at least should be (again in her words) "gelded like bulls" to remove their testosterone before even being considered for such a thing.

she also evidently believes that the problem with all religions today is primarily that they aren't "goddess worshippers", because she seems to think goddess religions are inherently peaceful and pure too and seems to be especially obsessed with "Isis" in particular. the very very few times she's openly considered it unambiguously bad for some population or another to have been exterminated (she's got a bad case of devil's advocating genocide brain), she's gone out of her way to make up some crap about how said people were a peaceful society of goddess-worshippers, almost always of isis. delusions of isis-worship seem to be the only thing that ever causes her to consider any arab or middle-eastern culture, society, or ethnicity to be relatively uncomplicatedly undeserving of extermination, in fact, because every fucking time she doesn't immediately start devils-advocating it and making remarks about how "the rest of the world should box them in and let them blow eachother up" it's when she's whinging on about how whatever specific micro-ethnicity she's thinking about are or were traditional persecuted isis-worshippers.

the sole major exception to her weird fixation on isis worship justifying worthiness of life is the whole israel thing going on, in which she has consistently made very obvious that literally the only reason she's against the genocide of palestine is because it gives her an excuse to even more openly hate jewish people than she already did. and honestly i'm not sure even that's true because i think she's made some offhand remarks about palestinians having probably been peaceful isis worshipers before the jews infected them with christianity or something anyway.

so for the last, however fucking long it's been i've been constantly having to listen to her go off about how this behavior is in the jew's blood or whatever and that they literally invented all genocide because somehow the concept didn't exist before them and wouldn't have ever been invented by the rest of humanity without those jewish aliens dropping it in i fucking guess apparently and she furthermore goes on about how every single genocide and mass-oppression movement in history is directly inspired by them, ESPECIALLY the nazis, and THEN i have to listen to her rant about how, basically, wwii was something they entirely brought on themselves by "dominating the economy and treating everyone not them like shit" and the nazis were just "using their own tactics back at them". and then she goes on a rant about how the people the original jews exterminated back in the day (aka the first ever genocide, which they invented, because jews invented genocide and hate according to her) in the middle east region were peaceful matriarchal isis-worshipers.

and then she starts making comments about arabs being backwards and palestinians either being mysogynist muslims that should be boxed in to blow eachother up with everyone else or secret peaceful isis worshippers corrupted by men's cruel hand, sometimes in the same sentence, entirely dependent on which group she's more in the mood to hate at the time.

it's exhausting. beyond exhausting. her sole purpose in existence seems to be to have the singularly most exhausting set of politics physically possible to fit into one person.

just, sometimes i think, if there really is anything at all to the incredibly stupid and inexplicably popular idea that anyone or anything has a Purpose tm to exist for, i feel like my mother's purpose is to be walking proof to me of a Type Of Guy That Is Real, cause i sure as fuck would have trouble inventing this mess if it wasn't standing right in front of me spewing confusingly bipartisan hate. all of her thoughts and opinions are these long winding nonsense chains that feel like if that man carrying thing sketch about the friend with confusing politics was a person. on meth.

[sp1d3rzz]

pt.2

Can we talk about how much of a pervert Midoriya is???

Warning !! : Masturbation, degradation, and pussy eating. Lemme know if I missed anything ^^

Like think about it. Your average bullied 'weird' kid who honestly doesn't have a lot, (no friends, no quirk, and certainly no girlfriend) is just so dirty.

Uses his computer a LOT. You can't tell me he isn't sitting there jerking off to his oddly specific choice in hentai because he can't stop thinking about how girl's hand accidentally brushed against his while walking.

Poor thing probably doesn't even know the girl was definitely gossiping with her friends later about the accident.

"I mean, did you see the way his cheeks went bright red?" followed along with a few "yeah"'s and "that guy is so weird"'s.

Or maybe he does?? Maybe he imagines how much shit the girls talk about him so his orgasm comes even faster. Midoriya finds pleasure in someone who knows how to put him in his place.

His rough hand moving up and down his length, biting down extra hard on the hem of his favorite 'Plus Ultra!' shirt to keep him from making too much noise.

Groans and whines are heard from behind the door to his room as he trails a thumb over his slit, bringing the pre-cum around his tip to ease the tension. His head dips back and his eyes close.

He imagines the feeling of being stepped and shoved into the floor with the heel of his favorite hentai cosplayer. Insults and degrading words going through his ears and to the blood of which flows to his girthy cock.

"You're such a naughty boy, hm?", "Say it, say your mommy's naughty little boy.", "Want me to spit on you?...Yes?? Dirty bitch."

Saddest part is that he just can't help how he feels. Always becoming heated whenever a girl tells him how messy and improper his hair is.

Of course, she means it as a way to make him feel self-conscious about himself. But little does she know how he thinks about how it'd look even messier if she were to tug at his green strands while he ate her out like it was his last meal.

Mouth desperately sucking up the juices of her cunt as he moans and whimpers pathetically from just the pure taste of her warmth.

His nose swiping against her clit every time he adjusts himself to get a better angle. Arms wrapping around plush thighs to bring her closer to his face.

"Tastes— so good–" he'll buck his hips up into nothing just to cool his sensations. Eyes watch every move she makes, just to make sure he's doing this right. Just to make sure he's pleasing her.

And when she finally cums and scoots herself away from him, she see's her wetness and cum have coated his face messily. The sight might be sexy, but who wants to do anything more with a loser like him?

So when she gets up and leaves like nothing even happened (despite the fact she's practically shaking as cum leaks through her panties), he follows her to the door.

"B-bye!" he calls out, and isn't surprised when she slams her car door, starts the car, and drives away. Just a little hurt.

[kisseobie]

p1harmony and the coquette boyfriend trend

pairings: ot6 p1harmony x reader

warnings: none

based on this tiktok trend

a/n: just a cute and silly little reaction (while i work on tumblr girls) inspired by @yunhoszn 𐙚 this trend is sooo over but who gaf if i wanna put a bow on my piwon’s biceps i should be able to like… also piwon as a whole give me the vibes of that picture of the rotc kid saluting with the caption “me when a bad bitch tell me to do something” so i tried to emulate that here too LMAOO

౨ৎ keeho

i already know kyo’s chornically online ass was made aware of this trend even before it actually took off, was going to bring it up to you, but being the stubborn man he is, opted out of doing so because he thinks it should be you begging him to let you tie him up in a little bow!! and he’s so real for that!! goes as far as reposting every single video following the trend he comes across, and starts humming the lana del rey song whenever your near so he can hopefully telepathically send you signals that he wants you to put a bow on his bicep and show him off!! his approach is a bit unconventional but low and behold it somehow works, and when you do ask him to film that tiktok he annoyingly pretends he didn’t even know about the trend in the first place, as if you didn’t pick up on his very obvious signs. says shit like “why a bow? but omg you’re soooo obsessed with me!” (and you are!)

౨ৎ theo

i imagine you bring it up to him and he’s just confused as to why that’s a trend and what its supposed to mean, and even when you explain it to him he still doesn’t get it. you show him examples and he still doesn’t get it. ask you meaningless questions like “why put a bow on me? what does the bow represent? i’ve never heard of this type of couple trend?” but his questioning doesn’t mean that he’s opposed to it!! quite the opposite actually, he’s very endeared over the fact that you want to make a tiktok with him despite your relationship being fairly new. i do think he would rather have little bows in his hair rather than the usual tie around the bicep, please put him in pigtails and call him your pretty princess because it’s what he deserves! you two end up laughing the entire time you style his hair and film the video, and it’s little moments like these that make your relationship oh so sweet

౨ৎ jiung

literally will do anything you ask for him because once he’s locked in, he’s locked in. when you timidly bring it up to him he’s gonna nod at you with big eyes and his little concentrated pout, reassuring you with no hesitation that yes, he would love for you to wrap him in a pink bow, and no, you don’t have to be embarrassed to ask him for anything. i honestly think ji has a bit of a possessive side if his radio conversation with keeho about his future gf dancing up on other men is anything to go off of, and the fact that you want to claim him as your on the internet, even if it is for a silly little trend, makes his heart happy and feeds into that quality of his. once you’ve filmed the tiktok, with one of his pretty fingers adorned with a singular pink bow, he gives you a kiss on the cheek and keeps the bow on for the rest of the day, even if he has practice later. this experience leads him to spending more time on tiktok despite his grandpa personality, and he searches for other couple videos you two can make together in the future :] just so sweetie pie

౨ৎ intak

honestly just like keeho he’s on tiktok all the time and gets behind trends pretty quickly, so when intak begs you to do this new trend he keeps seeing on his for you page you aren’t surprised. honestly, you had also been wanting to participate in the trend, partly because it’s cute and partly because tak has gorgeous arms, but you kept it quiet because you wanted him to work for it! it’s pretty amusing actually, he ends up forcing you to come along with him to the gym when he works out much more often just so he can lift heavy weights and flex his arms for you. he just wants you to deem his biceps worthy of being wrapped in a bow!! please don’t tease him for too long because he will have a permanent sad puppy look on his face for the rest of the month. when you finally cave and wrap his arm in a bow he is sooo cheesed. had this goofy grin on his face and flexes his muscles which results in him accidentally splitting the bow in two, which both pisses you off and turns you on at the same time?

౨ৎ soul

literally is so pliable under your hands, much like jiung he will let you do anything to him with little to no complaints or even acknowledgement. he simply exists to make his girlfriend happy! you don’t even ask him to film the video because you already know the answer will be yes (in the form of a strange sound), so you get to work as soon as you make way into his dorm room. you stay true to shota’s reputation of being slightly abnormal by wrapping the entirety of your roll of ribbon around his entire body, mummifying him from head to toe and topping it off with a delicately tied bow at his ankles. he doesn’t complain throughout the entire process, even if you’ve interrupted his gaming sesh with seob. when you film and publish the ridiculous tiktok, you point your phone towards him so he can appreciate the fruit of your labor, and when he finally does get to see the video for himself he lets out the biggest laugh that puts an equally big smile on your face

౨ৎ jongseob

you both actually discover the trend together! you two have a routine of cuddling up and scrolling through one of your for you pages, alternating phones each night depending on your battery levels. tonight, jongseob has your back against his chest as he scrolls through your tiktok when the trend first pops up on the screen, and you both get intrigued and scroll through the let the light in sound on tiktok to watch more. you don’t say anything to him but seob can tell you want to participate, and he ends up sweetly informing you that “we can do this trend if you want! i don’t have ribbon on me right now though..” and with that your eyes light up. the two of you end up buying ribbon at the craft store the next day for the sole purpose of filming that video, and you both rush to his dorm afterwards to film the tiktok. you end up settling on wrapping the dainty ribbon around both of his arms and torso, the pair of you refilming several times to get it “just right”. just like the other boys, seob is just happy to please his pretty gf!

© kisseobie, please do not repost my writing!

ʕ•̫͡ 𐙚

[neverchecking]

Could you do Yandere BOTW Champions or TOTK Sages x Reader who has the Mask from Majora’s Mask? The reader is Hylian. But they have the usual four mask, Plus the Fierce Deity mask.

As head cannons preferably.

This is a mostly Linked Universe Blog, but sure! I'm not overly well versed on the whole Mask deal, so please bare with me.

I went with the BOTW Champions, since not everyone knows the sages.

Champion of the Masks

・❥・So, if you know the Champions, there's a good chance you are a knight or warrior in your own right.

・❥・You are someone powerful, probably because of said masks. For Hylia's sake, you have the Fierce Deity looking over you. You are practically untouchable.

・❥・And the other Champions are well aware of this fact. But that doesn't change anything.

・❥・Because you are still so vulnerable. What happens when you're separated from your masks? Then what? Hm? You are just so vulnerable, can't you see that?

・❥・You don't have any powers of the wind, not any form of protection. You can't control any elements, nor can you heal. You certainly don't have any part of the triforce. You are powerless.

・❥・Which is why they needed to be there to protect you!

・❥・Now, Revali. My loveable douche-bird. He tries to keep you at a distance, but still falls. And he falls hard. Revali is the only champion who wasn't born with his gift. He had to build Revali's gale into what it was from scratch.

・❥・Reader probably recognizes all of his hard work, because (and this is from my very limited research) to get all of the Masks in their possession? A bitch and a half. They weren't gifted these masks. Not without a price. So they can recognize a situation where you are pitted against these...demi-gods eons beyond your own abilities and forced to catch up or fall behind.

・❥・And Revali absolutely cherishes this. Having someone not look down on him, but instead stand on the very same footing he was? Man's is down bad.

・❥・He is particularly fond of your Breman Mask because you just look so pretty in feathers. And while yes, white looked nice on you, blue looked better.

・❥・I HC that every race has their own form of courting rituals, Rito included. They probably make their intended betrothed some sort of snow-quill headpiece meant for the cold, lined with their feathers and intricate braids of fine silks and expensive ribbons.

・❥・You just know that Revali, as a champion, would make a nice courting present. And you just know he is purposefully difficult and makes everyone else come to him in the Rito village (He is their best warrior and is shown to lead their army in AoC). You just know that he demands the princess bring her two best knights, which begrudgingly means Link, but it also means you. You who wears the snowquill bit with pride-- even if you don't know what if means really.

・❥・It doesn't matter because the others do.

・❥・The next one to fall is Urbosa.

・❥・She falls after seeing you in battle. The Gerudo, regardless of gender, can respect a Warrior when they see one. And you are a warrior. You with your sharp wit and insane reaction times, parrying a blade aimed for her.

・❥・Your strength alone makes her swoon because out of everything she can respect that.

・❥・Her favorite mask of yours is the Garo's mask. Not only does it fool these supposed Garo (You are so smart, did you know that? With all of your stories and journeys.), but it also fools the Yiga. The Mask of Truth does as well, but the thought of spilling her guts to you makes her uneasy.

・❥・Not because she doesn't want you to know how constantly you're running through her head, but she doesn't want you to know how deep these thoughts delve.

・❥・When you're able to fool the Yiga and get back to her about an ambush planned on her people, she knows you're the one.

・❥・I like to imagine the Gerudo focus more on jewelry for a courting action. Not rings, no. But intricate pieces of armor lined with gems aimed to aid in battles.

・❥・Brigandines lined with topaz; Gorgets lined with opals; spaulders ordained in rubies; Poleyn decorated in sapphires. Even your own Scmitar enhanced by diamonds. All of it custom made to you to show her devotion to you.

・❥・Now, with this being all useful items you can wear in battle, you're seen in it often.

・❥・Daruk is next. He falls for you after seeing you in his, coincidentally, favorite mask. You tell the tale of the Goron Mask after he asks, weaving this intricate legend that had him hanging onto every word.

・❥・The Gorons show their love through food. So Daruk makes it a point to constantly share his food, both sedimentary and otherwise. He loves knowing that you are well fed and cared for because of him.

・❥・I feel like the highest form of love that can be shown through food for a Goron is a Prime Rock Roast. And while he knows Hylian's can't eat rocks (Link excluded because...it's Link), he looks for the next best thing.

・❥・Intricate pasties filled with only the finest of whipped cream and dusted with powdered sugar; dripping roasts just oozing juice that practically fall of the bone; grilled fish where the smell alone is enough to make you sallivate

・❥・All of it are gifted to you to ensure you think of him whenever you feel hungry. That he is your go to.

・❥・Now, next is a tie between Link and Zelda.

・❥・Zelda probably falls first because she sees you interacting with the others and watches you. In fact, you watch her back. But the difference between you watching her and Link watching her, because her father has allowed you to take over for Link on the rare occasion, is that you give her space. You allow her to disappear into the divine beasts, waiting patiently for her to come to you.

・❥・You entertain her with stories upon stories.

・❥・You listen to her woes with a careful ear and offer your own advice.

・❥・You even braved her cooking.

・❥・She loves all of your masks and cherishes each story about them. But when you wear the Great Fairy Mask and let fairies tickle her cheeks?That's when she swoons the most.

・❥・Link falls during all the time he spends with you chasing after Zelda. You're able to hold your own, which is always appreciated, and you're okay with silence. Silence settles between you two often while waiting for Zelda and you don't push it.

・❥・And you don't look at him like he's anything other than a Hylian. Not the wielder of the sword that seals the darkness.

・❥・Not this random knight that was handed a legacy on a plate.

・❥・Not an annoyance that needed to be shook off,

・❥・He was just Link to you. And it made his heart sing.

・❥・Unfortunately, neither are quite in the position to court you. Not with Calamity on the horizon, nor with their standings in the royal council. And it tears them apart in the inside. Seeing you decked out in jewels with feathers woven into your hair, eating some of the finest things Hyrule has to offer, all of it makes them bitter and hungry. Hungry to show how you belong to them.

・❥・You get prefential treatment in the castle. The finest of rooms with the softest of sheets. Plump pillows and too many locks on the door to keep you right where she wants satin pajamas, all just for your enjoyment.

・❥・Or the best weapons and shields available to the royal guard. Bows re-strung just for you, or the lion's share of arrows provided. Want that Shield that Jimmy Whosit has? Give Link three minutes. No, there's no blood on the shield, what are you talking about? You must exhausted if you're seeing things, maybe you should just skip training all together?

・❥・It's all yours.

・❥・Now, the last person to fall, is Mipha. She's very hesitant to lend her heart out to you, but you know who isn't afraid of showing their emotions on their sleeves for everyone to see?

・❥・Sidon.

・❥・Sidon, in all his little fishy glory, loves you when you come around. when you dawn the Zora mask and swim with him. You play all the games that Mipha won't because they're 'too dangerous'. So when you come around he's ecstatic, dragging his sister down to see you alongside him.

・❥・Mipha tolerates you for the time being, probably still in love with a different knight, making him his own armor. But after she finishes it, it's no longer shaped to Link's form. No. Somewhere along the way it went from being formed to his broader shoulders to being shortened to your own narrower set. It no longer was long enough to fit his torso, instead fitted to your own.

・❥・Her heart had tainted her hands, making armor for you before she even knew what it all meant. The only reason the rest of her catches up is because she sees you with Sidon.

・❥・She watches you swim on you back, with Sidon clinging to your chest, laughter bubbling up from both of you.

・❥・And the last of them falls.

・❥・She aims to give you the armor after the fall of the calamity, but...I'm sure we all know how that'll play out...

・❥・Anyway, between them all, you get very little time to yourself. They are all constantly hovering over you.

・❥・You think you can get away with one of your masks?

・❥・Nice try.

・❥・Your precious Stone Mask? Gone. Confiscated under the order of Princess Zelda King Rhoam.

・❥・Think you can fight your way out?

・❥・Not even the Fierce Deity mask can save you from the champions, their Divine Beasts, and the Triforce of Wisdom and Courage, nor their wielders.

・❥・You wanna run and hide?

・❥・There is not a single inch of Hyrule that one of them doesn't know about.

・❥・You are well and truly trapped under their hold, just where they like you.

・❥・Trapped like a fucking bird in a cage while they fight amongst themselves to see who you stay with.

・❥・ Let's hope they decided quickly before the Calamity decides he's done being patient.

[bookobsessedram]

Soap Mactavish x Reader - Mental Health Day

Word Count - 1.1k

Warnings - depression, cursing, very SFW

A/N: This is a gift for my friend @bunnyreaper, so reader is described!! Sorry y'all <3

For bunny, I want you to know that I love you so much and that you are valued and loved. I hope this brings some light to your life :)

For the past few weeks, it feels like every day has been the same. Wake up, cry, eat whatever shitty snacks are in the pantry, cry some more, check your phone, and go back to bed. Rinse and repeat. You know you must look like hell, with unwashed hair and bags under your eyes that won’t seem to go away, but you can’t bring yourself to care – or rather, you care but you can’t find the energy to do anything about it. You haven’t had the energy to do much of anything recently, now that you think of it. Depression is a bitch, you know, but it doesn’t change the fact that when it hits you upside the head with an emotional baseball bat, you’re unable to fight back with the metaphorical pool noodle you have in response.

Your phone buzzes on the pillow next to you, and you groan, opening your eyes blearily and sitting up. Afternoon light is streaming in through the blinds, and you squint at your phone screen. You have a myriad of messages, but you only care about one: a message from your boyfriend, Johnny “Soap” Mactavish, the cheerful, firecracker of a man that barreled his way into your heart and made a home nestled between your ribs. You love him with everything you have, but even speaking to him has taken more energy than you’ve had recently.

Johnny <;3: Mind if I stop by, bun? got something I think you’ll like.

Thankfully, Johnny has always been both understanding and accommodating of your mental health struggles and has never asked more of you than he thinks you can handle. Which is why, you think as you smooth out your hair in the bathroom mirror, he’s coming over to see you. You pull out your phone and fire off a quick text before heading to the bathroom.

You: I’ll meet you at the door :)  

By the time you’ve put on your least dirty pair of pajamas and brushed your teeth, there’s an excited knock at your apartment door. Knowing you must look a mess, you aren’t quite thrilled to open it, but all reservations melt away as soon as Soap sets the groceries he was holding down and sweeps you up in his arms with a bright smile and a gentle kiss on the cheek. “Olivia,” he murmurs, practically lifting you off the ground with the force of his hug. “Missed holdin’ you, love.”

“Missed you too, Johnny”, you mumble into his strong chest, feeling the muscles under his shirt. Yes, you were being squeezed quite tightly, but you most certainly didn’t mind it. It was nice to be surrounded by him again.

As he sets you down, you notice he’s holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his arms. You can’t help but smile at the sweet and romantic gesture, but before you know it hot tears are rolling down your face. Johnny’s brow furrows in worry, and he softly lifts your chin up to wipe your tears. “Shh, shh, bun,” he whispers, wiping your tears with his thumbs before holding you close. “S’okay, I’m here now, yeah? Yer not alone now. Never have been.”

At that, you cry harder, dampening his shirt with your tears, but your boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind. He lets you sob into his chest, rocking you gently back and forth in the doorway of your apartment until your sobs die to sniffles and shaky breaths. Once he’s sure you’re calm, he doesn’t hesitate before picking you up with ease and carrying you into the kitchen.

“Alright, love,” he declares, a determined glint in his eye. “First order of business? Getting some food in you.”

There’s no room for protest as he sets you down on the counter before turning to the stove. You begin to protest, opening your mouth to speak phrases like you really don’t have to and that’s too much, but the words die on your lips as he raises an eyebrow. “Don’t you dare, Olivia,” he teases. “I know you’ve been too unwell to cook.”

At that, you don’t offer anything but a sheepish smile and a shrug, and he grins. “Thought so, hen,” he says as he turns back to the stove and begins cracking the eggs he brought.

You watch as he assembles what appears to be the most perfect breakfast out of all breakfasts, complete with eggs, bacon, and waffles (admittedly, the waffles are toaster brand – while an amazing boyfriend, Soap does not have the ability to make batter from scratch). Handing you a plate and leaning next to you on the counter, he takes a big bite of the eggs. “What do you think?”

You mirror his actions, taking your own bite. Your stomach grumbles in appreciation, delighted at the first taste of real food, and you smile at him, your eyes showing a light in them he hasn’t seen for weeks. “They’re amazing, Johnny. Thank you,” you say, kissing his cheek lovingly in response.

As the both of you finish your breakfast together, you feel the dark cloud that has been surrounding you over the past few weeks slowly lift. By the time breakfast is cleaned up, you’re feeling a lot better than you had been. The flowers are freshly trimmed and put in a vase on the table, and they bring color to the apartment that you haven’t felt in a long time.

Soap gently coaxes you into the shower, and while you scrub the past few weeks’ tension from your body, he does a load of laundry and strips the sheets off your bed. By the time you emerge from your sauna-like bathroom, your pajamas are in the dryer and your bed is made with new sheets, blankets and stuffed animals folded and arranged with military precision.

As you sit with your back to his chest, Johnny gently brushing the tangles out of your curls and massaging your scalp all at once, he murmurs your nickname. “Bunny?” He asks.

“Hm?” You turn your head to look at him, the light of your bedroom lamp reflected on his face.

“I know that you don’t like asking for help. And yer so strong and kind and smart, you don’t always need to. But don’t ever feel like you can’t rely on me, okay?” He cradles your face in his warm hands, sincerity reflected in his bright blue eyes. “When your brain is lying to you, I want to be here to tell you the truth.”

At that, you can’t stop the tears from spilling over again, but unlike before, Johnny is here to hold you close in his arms, running his hands soothingly down your back and murmuring kindness into your ears. Unlike before, your bed is no longer empty, and your brain is no longer full of negative self-talk and racing thoughts. Johnny surrounds you like the warm blankets in your shared bed, his scent enveloping you and lulling you into a peaceful slumber.

You’re just barely drifting off when you feel him kiss your temple tenderly and whisper softly in your ear: “I love you, Olivia.” And then you fall asleep.

[yuri-is-online]

A Pocket Full of Posies and WTF is up with Rollo's Hankie

Before we begin, a slight disclaimer: yes, Medieval beliefs about disease and how it spread were weird. They did not have the ability to know about germs because those are literally microscopic and germ theory would not be "discovered" until the 1860s. THIS DID NOT MEAN THEY WERE STUPID AND IF I SEE YOU SAYING THAT WE WILL FIGHT. Anyway-

If you have been kicking around on the internet for a bit, chances are you might have heard the "dark history" fact that that the "Ring Around the Rosey" nursery rhyme is about the Black Plague. That's probably not true but the reason it was originally theorized to be the case has to do with Miasma theory, and the use of strong scents (typically herbs and flowers) to ward off the "bad air." What does this have to do with Rollo huffing that handkerchief every time someone talks about magic? Well we'll get there but first just what the hell do I mean by bad air?

Miasma Theory in Practice

The Black Death/Bubonic Plague was a roving pandemic that gets it's name from the first wave that bitch slapped Europe from 1347-1351. There were technically three forms of plague kicking around by I am not a scientist and we are here to talk about that. Given that this was, as stated in the disclaimer, pre-germ theory the ideas people had about why this was happening and how to prevent it wildly varied, but Miasma Theory was so popular it actually stuck around long enough to duke it out with Germ Theory when scientists started talking about that.

The basic idea is that diseases like the Black Death were spread from bad smelling air. This theory was proposed by Hippocrates, as in that guy from third or fourth century Greece we aren't even sure existed, but it was a pretty universal belief, we have sources from Ancient China that also reference the idea that bad smells can make you sick. This "bad air" was thought to come from decay; in the case of the plague, dead bodies were believed to have released it (hence all the "bring out your dead" stuff), as were cracks in the earth, and sewage. ALL AIR WAS THOUGHT TO HAVE A LEVEL OF MIASMA, but smell was the best way to tell if you were in danger of getting sick; basically if it smells like shit out then you are in danger because there is only so much of it you can breathe in before you get sick. So when you end 1351 with 40% (that we can confirm!) of the population dead, how exactly do you keep yourself from huffing in all that invisible miasma?

Roi du Mouchoir

Well you make the air you breathe smell nicer of course! And this is where we get to Rollo's hankie.

The "posies" in that nursery rhyme doesn't actually refer to one specific flower. It's a type of small bouquet, which apparently are also called nosegays or tussie-mussies? It's also the technical term for those tiny groups of flowers that make up a corsage. The idea was that people would carry around things that smelled good, like flowers and herbs, and any time you smelled something bad you would bring the flower out of your pocket and hold it up to your nose just like Rollo does with his handkerchief. Literally, people usually kept those nice smelling flowers in "Plague Bags," which could refer to nicely sewn sachets or just neatly wrapped up in cloth. Eventually these got super fancy, and evolved into these really elaborate pouches people put potpourri in, but given how strict Rollo seems to be with himself (and everyone else) I've chosen in my own fan fic to interpret his posies as being the common kind, which would be rosemary and lavender. Today they are thought of as being soothing scents that calm you down, and that does seem to be what he is trying to do with all those deep breaths.

I got a lot of this specific information from this article here which is on a wonderful website curated by a professional perfumer I highly recommend poking around if you are interested in learning more.

Cool Story But?

"Sure Yuri, all of that is neat but isn't Rollo's handkerchief a reference to Esmeralda's scarf?" Yeah probably. I don't really think it has to be that deep, but I do think this stuff is cool and well-

Malleus's name is likely a reference to the Malleus Malificarum, a book I have a PDF of on my computer because of course I do that was published around the same time that this theory of disease would have been kicking around. It's about- well the author says it's about "witchcraft" but that's another paper for another time, and why they are super evil and bad and should all die. Specifically why they should all be burned at the stake, it's a fun read. And sounding oddly familiar to certain events...

That's all to say, sure it probably isn't that deep but with all the other really well researched and designed character choices, I would not be surprised if it was.

Semi Unrelated Fun Facts:

Bridal Bouquets are thought to have started, in part, as a way to ward off Miasma and keep the bride healthy on her wedding day.

Miasma theory was still super popular in the Victorian Era and lead to a lot of public clean up projects as people thought that they could get rid of disease if they got rid of all the sewage everywhere. And hey they were right, just not for the reason they thought they were.

Yes a lot of people thought the Black Plague was a punishment from God and a sign of the end times. I will remind you that 40-60% of Europe's population DIED IN FOUR YEARS. I'd assume something supernatural was out to get me too tf? Seriously these people were not stupid, they just lived in interesting times.

If you are wondering "hey I heard Plague Doctors stuffed herbs in the long beaks on their masks, is this why?" Yeah it is! Gold star!

I love you for making this far, thank you for listening to me friend and I hope to get back to entertaining you soon (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ ) ♡

[ghoastixx]

Horror characters w/ a child in the school musical

Notes: In honor of my school's drama club being shut down and me having to go to my neighboring school. (You can tell I have favorites ;))

Includes: Otis Driftwood, Baby Firefly, Mama Firefly, Choptop Sawyer, Billy and Stu, Carrie White, Hannibal Lecter (and Will Graham), Beetlejuice, Micheal Myers (A bit RZ), The Lost Boys,

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Otis Driftwood

The fact that you even have to go to school is a problem to him. With his whole "I hate rules" get up, did you really think he'd want you going to some crummy government public school? He literally hates everything about it..

But... it would be suspicious if you didn't go to school, considering some people in the neighboring town knew there was a kid in the house..

When you bring up wanting to be in your school's musical?

He's all for it, wether you're a little kid or a teenager, surprisingly.

I think he'd be into the idea since he himself is very artsy, he sees it as his kiddo trying to express themselves, and he's all for it.

Especially if you are also in charge of the set (My school's was five people so I always did set), he's so excited to see what you come up with, even if it boringly lacks and pain and suffering.

He won't clean up to come watch it, he will genuinely show up with his matty white hair under his oddly stained cowboy hat, his 'burn this flag' tank top, dirty boots.. he gets odd looks, no one sits next to him or the family, murmuring that they stink.

he's so proud.

"______, do you know who that guy in the front row who keeps grimacing is in the cowboy hat? He's scaring off our audience,"

"That's my dad :)"

Baby Firefly

Oh, she is EXCITED

As a performer herself, coughcoughthefloorshowcoughcough,

If this is a highschool show, she gets into alllll the drama. All the petty fights, tantrums, affairs going on, all the juicy shit that happens during musical season. Perfect person to bitch with about it.

She will come to every single one of the shows, she tells people to come constantly.

She'd have you practice in front of victims as an "audience,"

She is so thrilled, this is the funnest thing ever to her.

Gushes over the costumes

If you don't get a lead you really wanted, she is just as petty as you are about it.

Opening night, she'll give you a boquet of flowers she totally didn't steal before hand.

The best drama mama!

"She's such a bitch, who's she think she is, huh? You deserved that role much more than them, god what a whore."

"Tell me about it,"

Mama Firefly

Aw, she thinks its so dear.

It's been a long time since she had a little one in the home, she's excited to do things that actually make her feel like a mom again.

Supports you in any way you need, practice running late? She's packed you a sandwich and an extra water. Need help going over a scene? Well, she'll try her damn best!

I feel she'd be the type of mom to help make her kids costume if it fell on the kids shoulder

She is so excited to see it when it comes time, she drags R.J, Otis, and Baby (sorry Tiny) out of the home to go see it

She dresses up all nice and fights her way to the front row

She cheers loudly for you.

"Do we have to be here?" Otis grumbled, "Yes, this is your little sibling, now hush it's startin'"

Chop-Top Sawyer

Oh god it's a mess,

it's not that he's not excited, he's very excited his spitfire is into music just like him

but that's the problem, he's too excited.

It's not like he can just... come and watch-

He's not exactly normal, y'know.

Now this could go two different ways,

1. He doesn't go watch, but makes Drayton go and record it so he can watch it himself (if he cares enough by then)

2. He goes and causes a scene and you both just blame it on his Vietnam PTSD which gets you both a lot of sympathy points.

If he does get to go, he freaks a lot of people out. He wears his wig, assuming they replaced his Sonny Bono wig, but is constantly digging at his plate with his tongue just..sticking out. Plus he talks funny and stinks and- god people are trying to figure out who this loud creeper is and why he's here..

Then they see him at the end of the show...standing with you. Gossip spreads quickly..

Some who refuse to believe it, mistake Drayton as your father at the end of the show.

"Hello, I'm assuming your ______'s father? I wanted to tell you just how talented-" "Oh! Hey Mister Johnson, I see you've met my uncle Drayton," "Uncle?" "Yeah, this is my dad," "Oh...Uhm..." "Hi *heavy breathing*" "Forgive him, he's still adjusting from 'Nam."

Billy and Stu

They are both so incredibly normal about your interests

So I'm like conflicted cause one part of me wants to believe that they don't really care all that much but the other part of me that recognizes them as huge nerds is wielding a sword.

Shut up, Stu had a musical phase in middle school, FIGHT ME.

Stu is definitely more excited than Billy is

and it's not that Billy's not excited, Stu just shows it more than Billy.

100% flexible with your schedule, they take turns dropping you off and picking you up if you can't drive.

Stu uses it as an excuse to get out of stuff.

"Sorry, can't, gotta take chick-pea to practice tonight, yeah sooo sorry."

Billy is the type to get volunteered by you if big pieces of the set need done and no one else will do it.

He'll grumble, but it will be done.

Stu donates a lot of money towards the program, half in attempts to get the director to favorite you and give you parts you want.

Stu and Billy come to every show, all of them, without fail.

This is important to you, and you're important to them, so this is important to them.

Stu is so hype on opening night, giving you a pep-talk all day before you go to get ready.

They are so proud of you when the show is over, and will both help you out of that after show slumps.

"C'mon baby, what was the name of the lead your the understudy for?" "Kelly?" "No, Chick-pea, the name of the actor..." "Guys- no."

Carrie White

stop she's so proud of you,

even if you don't end up with a big part, she's so proud that you have the confidence to do something she would have never dared to of done when she was young.

She might even be involved? I could see her making costumes- I mean, she made her prom dress and that shit was stunning.

I think she'd be more partial to you doing activities such as music or band or some form of art over sports.

The arts are just a lot less dangerous than sports, she just wants you to be safe. But she also wants you to be happy.

She will come to every single show,

She'd be the mom to help you go over lines if you needed to as well, or offer to try and help practice a dance you needed to learn.

She definitely cries watching you up on stage,

will get you the prettiest flowers and tell all your co-stars that they did such a good job.

"Mama, can you help me with this scene? I just need you to read for Yente," "Of course honey, where do you want me to start?:)"

Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham,

First off, you go to a private school. No kin of Lecter's is going to be caught dead in a public school.

He is rather thrilled when you mention performing for the school, he does love the arts after all.

Whatever you want and or need, singing lessons, dancing lessons, acting classes, whatever you want.

He will dress up for the occasion, he brings Will as well who is way under dressed, but it's always nice to see him.

I don't think Hannibal would come to every show, sometimes his appointments run late, he has a lot to do, but he will come if you have a parents night and he will come see the opening show.

If anything, Will might try and make all of them if you two are close, he knows what it's like not to have a parent show up to something so important.

Hannibal would make food for a cast party if you had one after.

No there are no people in it.

Hannibal has DVD's of all of the shows you have ever done and whips them out ALL THE TIME... The first time Will even heard of you-

"Hannibal, what are all these DVD's? Why are they labeled '_____'?" "Hm? Oh. _______ is my child, those are their performance videos." "you have a kid-" "They do musical theater, sit down, we shall watch the films." "you have...a kid-"

Beetlejuice

He's actually so upset that he can't come watch your show physically.

It's okay- there's a recorded version for him. He'll feel less bad.

He LOVES performing so this is actually perfect, but of course it is! You're his little ghoul.

He actually already knows the whole show so he is very good at helping you practice.

"Aw- toots- you're almost as good as me. Almost."

Micheal Myers (Slight RZ)

Like most things, he's indifferent.

Good luck getting him to come see even one of your shows.

He shows interest in your little hobby when you talk about it, sit next to him and talk about the show as he makes his masks. He listens.

Now.. If he does come see a show? He will only see one, most likely the last one as they are less packed (less likely anyone will recognize him,)

He'll wear a medical mask, his hair mostly covering the rest of his face, he sits in the very back.

He's slightly warmed at just how much the act meant to you.

Your director will approach you after seeing you hug the very tall man with the long hair and covered face, as he just pat you haphazardly on the head before leaving.

"______, someone you know?" "uh huh, that's my dad." "Your dad.. huh.. he seems very quiet." "Yeah, he don't say very much. I didn't think he was gonna come." "Well, I'm glad he did." "yeah, me too."

The Lost Boys

obviously, if you're going to school, you're a human still.

The only way they could come see your show would be if it was late in the evening, and they would probably show up late.

They're very happy for you and want to support you! It's just difficult with them being vampires.

Paul and Marko definitely get a kick out of acting out scenes from your script with you.

Dwayne is interested in the storyline, he also enjoys watching you act. You're in your element, it's like you're a different person.

David, on the other hand, is just amused that you're into all this stuff. It's not that he thinks its dumb or anything, he thinks you do a great job, it's just not really his scene, y'know.

But, you're their baby bat, they'd literally do anything for you, so as you're up on stage during the third song and see a blur of leather jackets and mullets sitting in the back, you can't help but smile.

"God- why are the guys from the board walk here." "They're my family :)" 'HUH-"

[pessimisticpigeonsworld]

https://www.tumblr.com/crushingthebroken/741170379192745984/the-fact-ryan-condal-keeps-hitting-with-the?source=share

I think there is a lot of bias in this analysis, what is your opinion?

Yes, there's definitely a lot of bias here; op is so clearly a pissy TG stan. This analysis is rife with observation bias and just plain misinformation. I do sympathize with some of their points though. Op is doing something I've seen a lot of TG stans do: projecting the issues in HOTD onto Rhaenyra.

HOTD is a pretty bad adaptation, full of inconsistent characters and just plain fucking up the characterizations of the people. The Velaryons definitely suffer more than most other characters from this. They made Rhaenys rather antagonistic to Rhaenyra, turned Laena into basically nothing, made Laenor a deadbeat dad, and Corlys is just kinda there.

However, op's complaints about the Velaryons' representation show their bias very obviously. They don't complain about Rhaenys' characterization until she's supporting Rhaenyra. They don't talk about the issues Laenor's running away brings in, just about how it makes the Velaryons' support of the Blacks confusing. They complain about Corlys not being hated for offering Laena to Viserys, but don't acknowledge how the show purposely aged Laena down to younger than Rhaenyra to make Corlys look worse. The most damning however, is how they complain about how Corlys didn't care about Vaemond's death.

Vaemond is killed both in the book and the show, both times because he was slandering Rhaenyra and calling her sons bastards. Daemon kills him both times (with Rhaenyra's approval in the book, which was a slay tbh). Corlys doesn't care in either occurrence because Vaemond was attempting to usurp Corlys' line and his chosen successors. Op choosing to ignore the actual truth of the situation shows they just hate Rhaenyra and are bitter HOTD didn't go all the way with making the Velaryons disloyal to her.

Moving on to their complaints about Rhaenyra's portrayal, another thing I agree with to an extent. HOTD made Rhaenyra into a much more passive character than she actually was. They made her virtually inactive politically, removed her approval of Vaemond's execution, and made it so she was unwilling to go to war until Luke's murder. They showed their benevolent misogyny. However, op isn't angry about the sexism of this portrayal or how they nerfed an interesting and fun character, rather about how she does fewer morally ambiguous and questionable things. They're upset that HOTD made it harder to say Rhaenyra is an evil bitch without revealing the misogyny of TG.

Op also complains about how HOTD doesn't condemn Daemon enough while actually portraying how awful Aegon, Criston, and Vaemond are. This shows how op isn't actually using media literacy. Condal and Hess constantly condemn Daemon and went out of their way to make him worse than he is in the book. Daemon didn't murder Rhea or abuse Rhaenyra in the book, those are things they added to make him look worse. Meanwhile they actively defend Aegon raping women and go out of their way to make him more "sympathetic".

Op also sympathizes with Criston, because apparently him being held accountable for his own decisions is wrong. He chose to sleep with Rhaenyra, he chose to murder Joffrey, he chose to dedicate the rest of his life to ruining hers. Criston isn't a good person, he isn't a victim, he made all his choices and can't accept the consequences of them.

Op also reveals how they are very anti Valyrian by throwing in a spiel about how Daemon is a neo-nazi and the Valyrians are fundamentally evil for utilizing slavery. Yes, slavery is abominable, however, criticizing Daemon and Rhaenyra for wanting to hold onto their cultural traditions that have nothing to do with slavery or human exploitation isn't wrong. If every person was expected to abandon their culture just because the culture has morally wrong practices, no person could ever hold onto their culture. This applies to the other cultures of AWOIAF, including TG's precious Andals who tried to literally murder any religion other than the Faith. Daemon valuing his culture is the least condemnable thing he's ever done.

Op also complains about how Otto is portrayed as being an awful person. I have to say, a TG stan wanting to defend Otto is new to me, but not very surprising. Of course Otto is portrayed as bad and the head of the greens, they took away all of Alicent's agency and had to give it to someone. Otto is a raging misogynist and only cares about power, that's all there is to him, but apparently he's more sympathetic than Rhaenyra for some reason.

In conclusion anon, yes, this is an extremely biased "analysis". Op hates Rhaenyra and is upset that Condal and Hess didn't go out of their way to make her the primary antagonist of the show. Apparently it isn't enough that they outright defend a rapist and made the Velaryons completely nonsensical. TG stans are ridiculous and are driven purely by hatred of Rhaenyra and/or House Targaryen, op is no exception.

[cxhleel108]

LITG S8 Thots for this week: I love winning!

(Fusebox hasn’t proven me wrong often…damn near at all, but oh do I love when they do!)

• Ok but his body kinda tea I’ll give him that.

• Also do I spy a Libra tattoo??? LIBRA GANG STAND TF UP!!!♎️♎️♎️

• Luna really just want every man in here except her own like damn bitch just give Jin to me since you so open to change😭😭😭

• The spat being us disagreeing on one thing for maybe 30 seconds and then Oakley immediately apologizing to and worshipping me like ok girl, sure.

• Keep trying all y’all want I’m not turning on my man😑😑😑

• We not doing this again uh uh.

• But also…HOW DO WE GET OAKLEY IN THESE??? QUICKLY!

• The fact I was finna deny speaking to Hari and then he brings up that he has intel on my man ugh they know how weak I am help💔

• The intel in question being that he was gonna ask us to go exclusive. WOW! WHAT A SHOCKER!

• Theo what I have to say to you couldn’t take any more than 5 seconds. Stop wasting my time PLEASE!

• Oh yes I love when a man acts “playerfully”…

• It was so obvious that the letter was from our partner can we stop being fucking dumb?

• We didn’t emote enough after reading that letter. I needed my bitch to break out into tears while screaming or something!

• They are arguing over the letter omfggg the day that this villa knows peace, pigs will be flying.

• I busted out laughing at this cuz some of y’all were theorizing that Bea was his sister. Do you know how funny that would’ve been if she was😭

• Oh for christ’s sake can Luna shut the fuck UP? I’m so tired of her getting pressed at Jin being flirty with other bitches as if she don’t do the same exact shit. Ho mad cuz he says Bea might be hot but was just begging Hari to give her pussy a taper fade haircut, girl byeeeee!

• Theo finally manned up and admitted he wants me. Woohoo! Can we move on?

• Outfit time!

• Ngl I thought this was gonna look a whole lot more stupid but thankfully it doesn’t. Now as to why they made accompanying shoes that we couldn’t even put on is beyond me.

• Jin stfu😭😭😭

• IGNORE WHAT HARI AND I ARE DOING BAE IS BACK AAAAHHHHHH😝😝😝

• Yes use the good punani powers to distract him sis exactly!

• I’m seriously so glad I didn’t have to wait 20 episodes to see my bookie bear again like y’all don’t understandddd.

• He just got back and he already being messy helpskdmsmasnd.

• I know they ain’t actually shocked that I dropped the rope during tug of war…I already told y’all I am a one dick woman!

• Figures that Bea is the one that’s actually with my man, yet Luna is the one that’s making me wanna smack the shit outta her.

• Outfit time again!

• Say what you want but they are definitely killing the outfit game this season. Another bad bitch fit!

• The fact we can just tell Hari to shut the hell up so we can listen to the other date awww he really shoulda chose another girl to go after.

• Ok I fucks with you Bea! We love real bitches here💯💯💯

• And the fact Oakley recognizes that we would NEVER play those games oh when I tell you we fucking him real good tonight!

• God why am I so evil😭😭😭

• We actually get a private moment and they didn’t hoodwink us this time omg can we get fed like this more often?

• Oooooo wait clock his tea bae! Cuz that actually don’t make no fucking sense like how you out of practice for 2 years and suddenly you pulling out romantic ass stories just cuz you meet one bad bitch on Love Island?

• Oh lord someone duct tape Luna mouth shut before she start another yap fest.

• To clarify, when I say “you both” I’m referring to Oakley and his donk. Sorry Hari!

• Mind you the stuff that’s supposedly gonna change my mind about him is finna be some shit like “Instead of buying you a box of chocolates, he said he was gonna get you a giant teddy bear and a bouquet of roses and carnations.” Like can y’all cut this shit out it do not be gagging us anymore😕

• Because of course as soon as y’all bring me my baby daddy back you take him away again…

• Welp, loyal girlies I guess it’s time for us to suffer for another 2+ weeks!

[infoglitch]

Why am I doing this again? Oh right cause I'm one of the few who will die on the that crwby ain't shit-(god if I keep ignoring writing my shitty fanfics people are just gonna assume i'm bitch made)

Oh boy here I go again poking the damn bear with my shit takes-

(also before I begin I want to ensure that my message is given context, I hate crwby as writers not as people, I hope people don't misconstrued that because otherwise that's just gonna be frustrating to deal with)

Pyrrha is a wasted character and a PRIME example that crwby can't write women.

Oh boy pyrrha Nikos where do I begin with this cardboard cut out of a character.

So since a few (and I mean A FEW) people choose to live in denial of the obvious fact that crwby cant write and that to claim they can is possibly the most bullshit statement ever.. its time to take out the belt (bout to go Hellsing abridged in this bitch)

I'm mainly using Pyrrha because she is the most GLARING example of how bad the writing of Rwby can get.

Granted I am notorious for consistently and without calling Pyrrha the worst character ever (about as bad as later volume Blake.. then again just Blake in general- hoo boy I really am gonna piss people off huh?) this is mainly due to the fact.. she's quite literally a peice of cardboard and i actively cheer whenever I rewatch her death... Ok that last bit was an over exaggeration but you get the point.

Now to begin why I actively believe Pyrrha is terrible, we need to talk about.. the noodle knight.. sometimes I despise the fact I like jaune but regardless-

Jaune as a character is fundamentally a side character... Yet he has consistent screen time.. again.. and again.. and again. To the point where you could jokingly say he's the real main character since Crwby just love putting him in as much screen time as possible. (However I more take it as the fact jaune is just a scapegoat for Crwbys incompetence. But that's for when I piss of the rwde aspect of the community, because oh boy.. is there an argument I want to rip to shreds and call blatant bullshit.)

But outside of the screentime he is mildly interesting and has made a few actions that add dimension to the character... But why do I bring up jaune when talking about Pyrrha? It's due to the fact Pyrrha's entire character revolves around jaune.

Pyrrha is rarely shown to interact with the rest of JNPR, it's practically non-existent if jaune is not somewhere.

But some of you might say (and honestly I don't blame you and would agree with you) "Pyrrha is a side character, she doesn't need depth." To which.. yes... But she was a part of team JNPR, her death is treated as if it should have affected everyone. Hell her death caused ruby to awaken her silver eyes. But there's one problem.. technically two

1. Team JNPR (or more accurately JNR) are still active participants in the cast, you'd think them being side characters they would eventually be thrown away.. but they aren't. So that would supposedly mean their important.. which includes Pyrrha but if that's the case then why isnt she given depth, you can't three people of an extra be important enough to be a part of the cast and given development but Also have the other team member not be given some given some kind of development, that doesn't work either don't give development to ALL OF THEM or do the inverse.

2. she isn't shown to interact with team Rwby by herself, she's never given any scenes to show that she is friends with ATLEAST ruby, so her death impacting others that SHOULD be her friends doesn't make sense now because there's no scenes with her interacting with them by herself.

Every scene that is pivotal is in some form or way connected to Jaune, but even though characters like her can be good if written well, she isn't.

Pyrrha is never once given anything that is specifically to show off her, she's always written to focus on jaune. Even her death which was supposed to affect all of team Rwby and Jnr only was shown to affect jaune.

To many it may seem like it's not an issue she only showed up for three volumes before kicking the bucket and dying. So what's the point of talking about her?

Well from me specifically, the problem is the fact Pyrrha is not a rare case of bad writing, not just for characters either, may I remind you all of the white fang subplot. Don't worry I won't go into too much detail I'm writing an entirely different post about how the faunus/white fang subplot got swept under the rug because surprise surprise crwby writers are shitty at writing.

Alright time to get on my soapbox to sound all high and mighty.

to explain it simply. The white fang arc was supposed to be a lesson that is meant to talk about how racism is wrong and the fact that it only hurts innocent people, (both of obviously the oppressed and the innocent people who are unintentionally associated with the oppressor, hatred breeds hatred y'all know the phrase) but instead its not even given anything specific. This is especially a problem considering one of our main characters is supposed to be the protagonist that helps talk about the issue. Instead of anything specific that shows the faunus are oppressed and that humanity still has extremely bigoted and shitty people all we get is.. cardin and that's about it.. and then in volume 5 (or 4 I unfortunately lose track sometimes) it's just wrapped up with.. Adam being taken down and the white fang essentially being forgotten about.. the white fang, you know the organization that is full of faunus who do want equality but are somewhat misguided.. their apparently just disbanded after the piss baby that is "Adam Taurus" just gets defeated.. is it me or doesn't it make more sense to atleast hear mention of some white fang stragglers who still misguidedly fight in the name of equality. Honestly it feels like it got rushed and not properly expanded on.

To put it bluntly I find it just so weird that crwby has been shown to not be able to handle topics that are a little more nuanced and decided to sweep it under the rug, same with writing characters that could be interesting, but instead are just turned into cardboard cut outs. Yet there are people who claim that Rwby is better than any media *cough cough* the Twitter bastards *cough cough* which.. look i love Rwby to death, it's music is fuckin magnificent early volume versions of the characters can be.. minus jaune kinda (man does got a few bumps when it comes to being a fan) but Rwby is.. mediocre. But it's not it's fault, that's just what happens when writers aren't able to properly write a story, characters, a world for the story, literally almost every attempt at adding depth to rwby.

Ok.. I'm fuckin tired I'm expecting a lot of people to disagree (I'm praying the majority aren't just gonna throw insults and nothing else because honestly that just makes anyone look stupid.

Alright time to get off the soap box and return to the cave where I write shitty Rwby fanfics and equally shitty original story.

[mushroom-circles]

Listen I haven’t watched 9-1-1 in like a year but. AU - you can hear what your soulmate is thinking but only if it’s absentminded/not conscious

Athena & Micheal used to be soulmates but started hearing other ppls voices like overlapping radio stations, Athena usually hears recipes from Bobby and the first time she heard “and now for the secret ingredient: love. Also know as an extra teaspoon of cocoa” she laughs for the first time since her and Micheal had the divorce conversation- Bobby usually hears police codes or Athena turning cases over in the back of her mind, especially the ones she has personal history with, used to hear his wife but yk how that ended up and he hadn’t heard anything but silence until he started opening up to people bc the universe is a bitch who knows what’s best for you even if you don’t

Listen. Eddie used to hear Shannon’s to-do lists for every day and yes it did make him feel both connected to Chris and like a bad father why do you ask? During/after the tenseness and then her leaving for her mom and staying gone he started hearing fun or “fun” facts like that mini golf used to be called Tom Thumb golf or that earwax is actually a type of sweat (??) Buck hears Eddie’s worries bc I love that man but he do be an absent minded worrier, some of it not bad like wondering if Chris is going to bring up mummification practices at dinner AGAIN and he’ll have to pretend like he doesn’t turn green bc he wants to encourage his kid’s interests but some of it heavy like the Texas period where he had three jobs and was worried about bills and not being there for his kid even if he was more present than he has been since he left for the army

Maddie hears hypothetical questions and pop culture references. She’s convinced Doug is her soulmate bc maybe he takes her to the movies their first date and mentions all these Hollywood classics that she’d never seen? And even when it turns out he doesn’t want to experience them WITH her he just likes to talk about something she’ll listen to and won’t have any opinions about she kind of smooths it over, confirmation bias yk. But he never once asks her about her plans for the future and there’s. That. And when shit happens she thinks about the latest question her soulmate would’ve asked her maybe as a distraction or something for the future? By the time she meets Chim she’s made plans for almost anything including time travel, zombie apocalypse, and suddenly becoming allergic to bubble gum. Chim thinks about a lot of different things ok. He swears he and his soulmate kept each other motivated bc Maddie would be thinking encouraging things while studying for a test or quiz in Anatomy (or another nursing class what am I a paramedic?) and realize they were both if not studying the exact same thing having a theoretical study session. It would move on to Maddie maybe thinking about things not to do? Even writing this is ugh but. Trying not to make Doug mad in a thousand and one little ways until it stops and he’s so scared bc what happened? But when he hears her running through her checklist/procedure for getting out of there, getting a little more foolproof every time, it’s the biggest fucking relief because he couldn’t do shit when he didn’t even know who she was. When he has his first random run of the mill thought since what was presumably Maddie’s residency he cries

And Karen and Hen!! Karen definitely gets a lot of statistics at first I think, from Hen’s job as an insurance agent and then when she starts studies her ass off to be a paramedic yk that’s the only thing for a while. And well. Don’t know if the infidelity still happens in this universe but can you imagine how chrushing it would be to have one of the thoughts she hears after she and Hen are married be don’t tell Karen or smthg and then have that be the way she finds out abt Eva and Hen meeting up? The angst. Hen hears calculations and know her soulmate is going to be brilliant even before she starts getting into the serious stuff bc sometimes they’ll skip like a record and she’ll go from one side of the equation to the other with no thought in between (which does fuck with Hen sometimes maybe? Like why is she only getting incomplete thoughts? Are they not fully soulmates/is something changing (bc YES in this universe soulmates can change bc you are an ever evolving person and so is everyone else, you’re not going to be perfect for the same person your whole life) and maybe that’s part of the events that lead to Eva happening? And like obviously it’s not Karen’s fault it’s just a sign that humans are emotionally lead and messy etc.) and when she meets literal rocket scientist Karen everything just kind of… clicks. And if they do have the Eva mess to go through I think they should both still have to work for each other? Like yes you’re soulmates but that doesn’t mean you just accept that and never worry about your relationship again, you have to adapt evolve grow with hardships and joy. (I like to think that Karen has at least one “well of course it’s not rocket science or else I’d be able to DO it” thought every time someone says that phrase and it always makes Hen warm and fuzzy because that was part of how they found each other)

Anyway many thoughts for a fic I will probably never write

[nemjun]

please tell me every detail of u and tsukasa because I am beyond obsessed with you two

would you believe I had 2 whole ass paragraphs written when i switched tabs and lost it all??? this is hell, tumblr is hell.

annyways YES OK SELFSHIP SATURDAY LETS GO, UNDER A CUT BC IM SHY AND IM GONNA BE RAMBLY. TLDR, summed up as Me and the Bad Bitch I pulled by Being Autistic

I GOTTA BE HONEST, tsukasa was not it for me when i first started the series, but i was also busy chewing furiously on senku bc he's Neat. but I was sunk after we found out about Mirai he loves her SO MUCH. big stronk man good with children is an instant K.O., i was smitten so quick.

Dr Stone is actually the first series i ever Blatently self inserted into! it was a really good fit and I felt that i could just, genuinely suit the story setting bc 1) ADHD has blessed me with sprawling random curiosities and an accumulation of trivial but Useful knowledge and 2) I literally studied archaeology for my B.A. and bc I live in Canada most of our archaeologoy is based on the Indigenous population who was still using stone technology when first contact with europeans occurred. random note for anyone who might be parusing, the 'ages of history' such as stone, bronze, and iron, didn't occur across all of civilization unilaterally, and the technology used by people is not an indication of civility or advancement of a social group. Anyways.

My real life plan for after I finished Uni was to go and teach english in asia! This didn't happed for various reasons, but it presents a good opportunity for bending realty into fitting me into the series, ehe. I genuinley think it would be really funny if I got revived by the Tsukasa empire by complete accident, busting outta the stone speaking minimal japanese and being a literal scientist by education - i was put here to cause problems on purpose. Tsukasa and I would absolutely start out as bumping heads, not quiet immediatley but as someone Anti smashing people and pro science it gets hostile fast. Arguments are conducted largely thru translations via Ukyo, who i quickly grow attached to as the only person capable of commincating in fluent english (we also have birthdays close together and I Adore that, we're birthday buddies, v cute stuff) I gotta sidetrack for a second bc as much as I love this series theres SO MUCH STUFF THAT JUST ISNT ADDRESSED AND I GET ITS JUST A MANGA BUT IM A WEIRDO. like, what about the bees??? they were just chill after having simbiotic relationships with humans for thousands of years?? sure y not. k sorry

I do wonder tho, if Tsukasa would see me as a threat to the stability of his Empire. Even with poor communication with the majority of the group, I've got a decent set of leadership skills and a lil bit of charisma, and who wouldn't like me really - esp with all the useful knowledge i can bring to the table (yes im hyping myself but its also true, i know how to do pottery and i've experience with stone tools & the types of stone you can use). I think even if he did, I'd really only get put in time out if I was causing problems, and like Taiju and Yuzuriha I might have someone keeping an eye on me. Thing's between me and Tsukasa start to change when we manage to find common ground, using him to practice japanese and finding out about his sister and his feelings about wealth etc - admittedly this was Not Well convayed in the anime, but when he's beaten up while getting seashells on the beach, the adult is yelling at him bc he doesn't want kids running around and stealing from 'his' beach. And his mom sucks too. I think that's something we could bond over, having lousy times growing up. I think he'd also be sensitive to the fact that I'm so far from Home and all my friends and Family, he's very thoughtful like that.

Man this is already reallly long and i dont feel like I've really said much, but I think when it comes down to it, Tsukasa and I just share a lot of the same values. He's strong and kind and good hearted, and that makes me feel safe. He's just very caretaker coded to me and after thinking about it the last few days, i think thats something I'm really looking for in a partner. I think I also balance him out a little bit, make him look at a bigger picture and slow down to enjoy simpler things. When we start to get along a little bit, I like to think that I'd accompany him on simple outings to forage or something, or maybe I'd be able to drag him away for a little while to show him something Neat, or getting to teach him something. He teaches me how to fight a little bit as well, so that I'm better able to take care of myself.

I think that's all I've got for now, but it's nice to sit and think about it and write it down, maybe I'll do a lil more writing over the next few days :3 OH I ALMOST FORGOT, i did a star chart love compatability thing and what I got to read for free was SO FUNNY like, he's enchanted by my whimsy lmao

[musicrunsthroughmysoul]

Not only do I prefer the demo version musically, but lyrically it seems more cohesive than the studio version.

Like, omg no, why did he get rid of this verse (which, upon a bit of research, because I'm not a songwriter, I believe is actually the bridge!):

"I never dream of times like these When all my time is never free And every tear drawn face we see Is hung on you and me"

It's absolutely related to the rest of the song!!! Hello!!!? (I also love the commentary of "When all my time is never free"...it's very "Belief in the Small Man" to me, in terms of thematic similarities and how Big Country progressed as a band and still retained their values in their music.) The next part of the bridge (unless it's considered an entirely separate bridge...I'm not a songwriter, as I already mentioned, so I do not know!) doesn't fit quite as well to me, though, even though conceptually I love it and I'm curious if Stuart Adamson ever reused it for another song.

Anyway, I also love this demo version lyrically because, as compared to the studio version which is very 'Hello yes I'm putting all of my emotional baggage on you* and I can only be happy if you accept it without expecting any reciprocity from me...thank' but THE DEMO VERSION'S LYRICS NOTABLY DO NOT DO THAT!

*Whether he's talking about a partner or his homeland/country and countrymen, it's still kind of manipulative to me because, again, he makes no mention of 'If you do this for me, I'll do it back on your behalf,' so that's SHITTY! 😞 And it is, in fact, the opposite example of why I love "Wonderland" so much! So that makes the studio version of "I Could Be Happy Here" feel regressive. 🙃

Although I personally do not get what in the hell he meant by "If you could take my pride/If you could take my tears/If you could take my side/If you could take my fears/If you could turn the tide/You could be happy here" because that sounds like 'Here's my emotional baggage; NOW YOU CAN BE HAPPY [WITH IT]'???????????????? I'm sorry, WHAT. Hm...I guess it's just a good thing that was scrapped from the studio version, because, um, yeah...what. YIKES.

But after that bizarre verse, he gives us both of these verses:

"I will take my love I will take my stand I will be the one I will show my hand I will never run I will be happy here"

(Finally, a bitch takes responsibility! Good - THANK YOU!) And:

"We’re gonna use our love We’re gonna take a stand We’re gonna be the one We’re gonna show our hand We’re gonna never run We are happy here We can be happy here"

So he's not only taking responsibility, but it's implied that he shares it equally - and whether that's in a hopeful and hypothetical way or whether it's active (I could see it both ways, personally), the important thing is that it's still an equal effort. Yes, that fucking matters! Also, I'm intrigued by the first time he changes the verb type in the last lines of the verses "could/will" from a modal verb to a supporting verb "are" in the line "We are happy here"; it's the first time he switches from uncertainty with "could/will" to absolute, present tense certainty of "we are" (although to me it loses a lot of its power when he immediately returns to the modal verb of "we can")...I'm not sure why he did that, except that "we are" happens to follow the pattern of the rest of the "we're" contractions in the verse's anaphora (which I had to look up as I am very much not an expert in poetry - it's the practice of word or phrase repetition at the beginning of a group of poetic lines), but then to not only break the anaphora but return to the hypothetical context of so much of the rest of the song feels like a letdown! Oh, well - at least the final verse brings back the supporting verb of "are" for "And we are happy here" as the final two lines! :') So that's something to look forward to, literally, in the rest of the song.

[orleans-jester]

Rapunzel could never be Barbie. Her greatest aspiration was to become a social worker, and thank fuck that didn’t work out, or there’d be even more screwed up people out there. She settled quickly on being a mooch. He was still peeved by the fact that she had once talked to his work and got him a week off behind his back and then planned a whole trip to England. Spur of the moment plans? Great! Surprises? Sure! Making a man take a week off work when he was still new-ish to the job and use up all of the vacation days that he ever had, and rid him of the chance of making money that he could have used a lot more than a trip to see his mother? Nah, that’s not right, innit. He’s been stewing on that for near on twenty years.

Laughter was usually a good sign. It didn’t sound too manic. I didn’t exactly sound like the kind of laughter that usually covered up a cry either.

“I’m glad my former misery brings you such comfort,” Thomas said, though he was chuckling. It really was a whole lifetime ago. Plenty of wasted time. But he was making up for it now, wasn’t he? He was exploring the world with his favorite person by his side. Someone who would never put him through all of that annoying disney princess shit. “Practicing is one thing, but having some flouncy woman tell you that you aren’t moving right - oh, it was absolutely tragic. I know about rhythm, thank you very much.”

They were always going to be them. Marriage required being best friends throughout, it was even more important than the romantic aspect sometimes. Having each other’s backs no matter what, always keeping a couple of brews in the fridge to have a chat and bitch about life sometimes. That aspect wasn’t going way.

“Yes please,” He grinned. “Moltov cocktail that bitch, like old times.”

There were still a lot of times when he wanted to go back and time and beat himself over the head, like Rafiki to Simba with that big stick of his. Stop being so stupid. Stop being so pretty-girl-blind. Stop falling for the first person that seems to need you in any capacity. Doesn’t matter that it makes you feel like a big man, just makes you into a beta in the end. But alas, he only met one time traveller and he couldn’t take him that far back, so there was no point in dwelling on it too much. He had everything now. Better late than never.

“Not even a moment over,” He said, making his statement all the more dramatic, but he meant it. Flotsam had one of those ageless-type faces. It was beautiful. Maybe there was something to growing up with the swamp air and muds.

They didn’t need Kuzco in order for things to be musical. Thomas was a natural piano player and Flotsam - he was just skilled at everything else. This bursting out in song moment felt a bit like a musical but it wasn’t nearly as annoying as one. The turnip vendor was very happy with the big purchase and began bagging right away, not commenting on the singing because every good businessman knows that you don’t ask questions when money is being thrown at you.

It wasn’t really a song that he knew but he took part eagerly, watching, holding the stroller until Flotsam took his hand and they did a spin. Impromptu. Not choreographed. Not to Ed Sheeran. Just natural, like dancing was supposed to feel.

It was a good message too. And something that they both did. Enjoy each moment. Look forward to the next, but not at the expense of the present.

--

Thomas had out a knife, was carving the turnip carefully. It felt a lot different to a pumpkin. Most of the ones that he had seen while researching ideas came out looking like mummy heads, which was indeed spooky in its own right but he wanted a couple that were more just .. them.

“It’s no less crazy than when we started looking into properties on our honeymoon,” He said with a little shrug. These grand ideas - they didn’t seem outrageous. They seemed entirely within the realm of possibility. A dream they could reach. “Don’t celebrities do it all the time? I don’t see why we couldn’t. It is a gorgeous spot.”

Flotsam wasn't mad at Piper exactly. Shocked maybe, but only for a moment in that well damn kind of way, but also nothing could shock him anymore sort of numb. Part of him wanted to thank her while another part wanted to scream. Mixed emotions, but mad was never one of them and not one emotion was actually directed at Piper herself, just the land itself he put so much of himself into. Grief. That's what it was as he let it all burn away and heal those third degrees.

Rapunzel didn't come to mind much either for Flotsam truth be told. It was pretty rare too. Blondes didn't even trigger her image anymore unless they had a certain aesthetic maybe. The extremely ditzy or over smiley kind. It didn't even have to be pink necessarily. Pink itself was fine now too. Elsa could wear pink and she wouldn't look like a bubbly idiot. She always looked classy. So it's all in the presentation. Excessive being the key word here, so overwhelming pink reminded Flotsam more of Barbie with the movie out and Barbie for as much as there may have ever been jokes in the past didn't actually remind Flo of Rapunzel at all. Rapunzel's personality was ever sadly too dizzy to be a Barbie. Even Flotsam knew Barbie could be anything. He wouldn't give Rapunzel that much intellectual credit. Anything was not something she could aim for. He has a theory her magic hair drained the intelligence from her and that's the credit he tries to give her in his own secret space, attempting to give her some justice so that at least it's not her own fault. So yeah, all the usual things that might point that way just... didn't anymore. Ed Sheeran had a direct connection memory that managed to hone in though. The past was funny that way.

But, anyway Flotsam also wouldn't have known any of those videos were yes dear videos. He was an outsider spying in. A jealous one at that and was going along with his own life wishing Thomas would look his way, even though he knew he wouldn't. At least at the time he thought he never would.

He was wrong.

Clearly, now, married and three kids later, he was wrong.

"I'm okay." Flotsam coughed out attempting to settle his breath.

He could tell Thomas was initially worried and then seemed confused. He could sense eyes on him while he was laughing but he could not stop for anything after everything lately.

Everything. Meaning finding out about his birth parents. That he's a damn experiment, hardly a normal person at all. Thaddeus bullshit. Gender swapping. Giving birth. Watching Scout transform. All the invasive ghost writing. Putting Jet's necklace on and feeling it around his neck daily knowing who his mother made it for. Ariel. Delta. All of it always came back as he held the amulet and he had to to even be Flotsam at all. Now Marina Del Rey. So yeah, Irish vacation needed so badly. Relaxation with their husband was a need, not a want. They just needed a damn minute to step back and breathe.

Talk about overwhelming. Try all that in a body while being sober for the first time in your life. Add a layer of intensity no one else is understanding when your only coping behaviors are fucked as all get out.

"Choreographed dance less- Really? Oh. You are just making it better." He laughed loving the images even more. It made his mind go back to Cinderella and how much he practiced so he could sweep her off her feet dancing at the prom. "Shit. I've been there. Done that kind of shit. Well, minus the choreography. Just practiced dancing."

Okay, maybe they were three kids in, but maybe it was still nice to feel that old them was still there. The two best buds that first met and bitched about shit together. It had Flotsam grinning. He liked that feeling. It didn't have to be about their exes. But, after not being in his own skin for so long, it helped him feel like him again, them again. He kinda needed this little moment.

"If we get a do over, I'll remember that." He joked. "At the very least burn down the studio." He kept laughing.

For some reason it didn't hurt to talk about the past anymore. He was realizing it for the first time as he was smiling through all this.

Flotsam definitely always thought Thomas was something special. He just didn't know how to show it once upon a time. Once upon a time an dirty swamp cowboy learned how and grew into a Nutella princess. goddess.

"Not a day over, huh? Loving your compliments, Love."

"Okay, okay." He said as he enjoyed the warmth of Thomas's hands on his lower back as they strolled along.

"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time - Any fool can do it - There ain't nothing to it."

Then Flotsam would just smile at him as if he said the words that unlocked the mystery to life and not adult, soft rock. folk, oldies lyrics.

But then he kept going even though it was just the first lyric line he meant to share. He got caught up in the song as it started to spill out. He might not have been Kuzco with groove music bursting from nowhere, but he kept singing right out on the sidewalk. He didn't care what people thought. He walked right up to the turnip stand and said they'd take the lot and just kept singing between it as he spun a credit card at them.

"Nobody knows how we got to the top of the hill But since we're on our way down We might as well enjoy the ride

The secret of love is in opening up your heart It's okay to feel afraid But don't let that stand in your way 'Cause anyone knows that love is the only road And since we're only here for a while Might as well show some style

(He'd take a huge shuffle side step with his arms up in the air and take a spin to show some style as he sang this too.)

Now the thing about time is that time isn't really real It's just your point of view How does it feel for you? Einstein said he could never understand it all Planets spinning through space The smile upon your face

(He'd grab up Thomas's arms and spin one dance spin in the middle of the sidewalk being a bit silly, grinning away before coming back around to push the stroller around in a circle to have fun with the kids at the next phrase.)

Welcome to the human race Some kind of lovely ride I'll be sliding down, I'll be gliding down Try not to try too hard It's just a lovely ride

Isn't it a lovely ride? See me sliding down, gliding down Try not to try too hard It's just a lovely ride

The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time"

He'd watch the vendor load their car with turnips and something about sharing that made Flo happy. He was in a good mood.

-

Beach Turnips were next. Carving their own Stingy Jacks by the sea.

Blankets. Dinner picnics. Tea.

This is where Flotsam would sit back looking at their cottage and get his vision to gothify it like a storybook Samhain. He always had a knack for seeing the potential in things.

"Thomas. I think I might be crazy, but what if we just bought this place?" He asked while lining up a circle of turnips up like baby gate around the kids on the blanket in the sand, as if that would really keep them in. "Is it weird to own land in a country you don't live in?"

[leatherbookmark]

i swear to god, jgy being bitchy/prickly as a proof that he's finally opened up to someone is possibly my most disliked fandom treatment of him, because with obvious jgy haters at least I know we have exactly nothing to talk about! aaaaand block! but then people who claim to love him just make him into a total opposite of who he was in the novel and it's just like. sigh

[theladyofbloodshed]

@nerisweek Day 5 - Modern AU

When Nesta has to attend her sister's engagement party, she dreads seeing her ex-boyfriend there. Thankfully, a knight in shining armour saves the day.

‘Please, Nesta. Say you will.’

Nesta sucked in a long breath. Her younger sister sat opposite her, golden-brown hair plaited into two braids. She wore a top printed with sunflowers beneath her dungarees, every inch the happy flower she’d always been. Nesta could never say no to her big brown eyes.

‘I don’t know Lucien’s family.’

Elain shook her head dismissively. ‘So, you can get to know them! Lucien isn’t even close with them but his father insisted on throwing us this engagement party. I’m a little nervous to be honest.’

She wrapped the end of her braid round her finger to emphasise that fact. Nesta knew Lucien’s father was an old bastard to put it simply - that was how Lucien has described him on one of their first meetings where Nesta had interrogated him with intense scrutiny about every detail of his life. His brothers were equally as awful according to him. When Nesta had enquired how he had ended up to be a nice man, Elain had said he was a mother’s boy and stroked his cheek. 

‘They will be there.’

It was more of a statement than a question. An impending sense of doom followed it. When Nesta had first moved to the city, the only person she had known was her sister, Feyre. She’d gotten swept up in her friendship group despite knowing they were not people she would ever have chosen. She had burnt that bridge, refused to even look at it and acknowledge that she had once been a part of it.

‘Yes. But Feyre is bringing Nyx!’

The only reason Nesta met her sister any more was to see her nephew. She didn’t get on with Feyre’s husband, nor his clingy cousin or any one of their other friends. They moved as a pack. Where one went, the others followed. And within that pack was Cassian. An ex-boyfriend that she was forced to endure the company of from time to time. He had a habit of showing up on her scheduled visits with her nephew. He made it his personal mission to rattle her to the point of fury.

‘Fantastic.’

*** 

It was an outdoor occasion in early June which meant Nesta had taken double the recommended dose of anti-histamines, clogged her eyes with drops and her handbag was stuffed with tissues and a nose spray. She’d chosen a lilac floaty dress which she already felt self-conscious in. It was a halter neck that left her back completely exposed. She tended to alternate between sweats or business attire, never a dress so pretty. She reminded herself that it was Elain’s engagement party and all eyes would be on her sister - except for when it was her turn to make a speech. At least Nesta had been forewarned for that portion of the day. Elain had practically begged her to speak.

On the drive there, her stomach bubbled with nerves. The last time she had seen Cassian, they’d had a blazing row. He’d called her a stuck-up bitch and she’d returned the favour by calling him an impossible man-child then slammed Feyre’s door in his face. It is Elain’s day, she reminded herself again, no arguments. 

The estate was enormous. A huge white mansion sprawled out at the end of a long drive that was lined with rows and rows of nearly cut conifers. She was directed to the parking lot where a few other guests had already arrived. Already the high pollen count had her throat itching on the walk to the massive grounds. The wedding would be at a beach and Nesta couldn’t decide what she hated more: pollen or sand.

Flowers were everywhere, in every bed on every bush. More had been arranged for the occasion - likely by Elain herself - and they hung in garlands and wreaths. She spotted Lucien’s father, stern faced as always, speaking with other men of a similar age likely about business near one of the large marquees that had been erected. 

Finally, she found Elain and gave a sigh of relief as her sister swept her into an embrace. ‘I’m so glad you came!’

‘How the hell have you afforded this place? You do know you have a wedding to pay for as well?’

Nesta was contributing to the wedding since their parents were both dead. Elain worked as a florist. It wasn’t lucrative but she enjoyed it, so Nesta was happy to funnel her finances towards her sister. It was unlikely that she was marrying anytime soon. Their father used to joke that whatever man was mad enough to take her on deserved a medal.

Elain blushed and glanced over her shoulder at Lucien’s father. 

‘Lucien’s family is quite wealthy. This is one of their homes.’

Any words that Nesta had buried themselves in her throat. This was their home. This enormous palace with its grounds stretching on as far as the eyes could see was their home. One of their homes. 

‘I need a drink.’

‘Wine? Gin?’

Nesta shook her head. ‘Still not drinking. And I’m driving. The phrase serves its purpose though. I’ll take anything cold.’

They walked together to the bar - all paid for, of course, by the Vanserra family. It had been a few years since Nesta drank. She leaned heavily on it during difficult times and Feyre and her friends were inclined to drink wine for every occasion. It was better for Nesta if she avoided it entirely though she found she didn’t miss it. 

More guests arrived and Elain was led away in their greetings. A few made polite conversation with Nesta when they saw her standing alone. She’d been told more than once - including by Cassian - that she had a resting bitch face so people tended to avoid her. 

She was inspecting a rose bush when she heard the familiar boom of Cassian’s laughter. Of course, he had an arm slung around Mor. Strictly platonic, Nesta thought with irritation. His scraggly dark hair was drawn back into a messy bun and he was decidedly more dressed down than any other guest. Feyre was struggling with Nyx who thrashed in her arms wanting to walk. He was a sickly child after a difficult pregnancy and they coddled him beyond belief. The poor boy only had sugar when auntie Nesta gave it to him. Everything had to be organic. He had a regimented day which only ended up stressing Feyre because he wouldn't nap at the regulated times. Her husband was conversing with Azriel, both males dressed head to toe in black, more suited for a funeral than an engagement party. Lucien strode over to greet them, red hair shining in the sunlight. 

Nesta inhaled slowly, watching as the group took in the beautiful surroundings. Then Cassian’s eyes snapped to hers. He was moving. She was moving. Moving quicker towards a gate in between the rose bushes not caring where it was going.

She slammed it shut and kept her legs moving. He called her name. Then came barking.

A glance to her left revealed the sight of a pack of dogs, all barking, all pounding towards her. She’d been good at track though not in heels. Nesta sprinted across the lawn, only just making it to the small house at the other end of the garden as she slid open the door and took refuge. 

‘Fuck me,’ she breathed, over the roar of dogs.

Her heart pounded as she leant against the glass. Out of the dogs and Cassian, she’d take being chased by dogs. 

‘What’s the fuss? Shush.’

A man’s voice came from somewhere in the house. The dogs were still at the door, barking and leaping against it. 

‘We’ll all get told off if you keep up that racket.’

Lucien’s brother, clearly, from the short auburn hair and brown eyes. He didn’t seem too alarmed by the sight of Nesta in his house. 

‘Can I help you?’

‘The dogs chased me,’ she panted. ‘Just needed somewhere safe.’

The corner of his mouth quirked into a handsome smile. ‘That’s what they’re trained to do when a stranger enters their property. You must have run very fast. I’m impressed.’

‘Ex-boyfriend at the party,’ she said, swallowing against her dry throat. ‘I’d have run a marathon in these heels to avoid him.’

He gave a laugh, tipping his head back. Then he filled a glass from the tap and held it to Nesta. She gratefully downed it. Her heart still fluttered uneasily and she was glad for the amount of deodorant she’d sprayed on that morning.

‘I am making an assumption that you are Nesta since you look like Elain but aren’t covered in tattoos or have a child with you.’

‘You would be correct. And you are one of Lucien’s brothers but I don’t know any of your names.’

‘Eris. First born. Vanserra family name atop my shoulders. No pressure.’

‘You live here, not the big house?’

He shrugged and looked around the neatly furnished home. ‘Gives me space. I’m an architect so my office is here. Nobody bothers me. Plus all the dogs can only put hair on my belongings.’

‘All your dogs?’

She could count at least seven that were still on the porch. The barking had ceased and their tails wagged happily. The glass was smeared with nose prints and muddy pawprints.

‘Proud dad of twelve,’ he replied with a smirk. ‘Give me a moment to change then I’ll escort you to the party so you don’t need to break the Olympic sprint record on your way back.’

It really did only take him a few moments to emerge from his bedroom in the bungalow in smart black trousers and a white shirt, rolled up to the elbows. He ruffled his auburn hair casually though the crispness of his clothes suggested designer, very expensive designer. 

‘So, this ex-boyfriend, how did he wind up at your sister’s engagement party?’ Eris knelt down to lace up his shoes. 

‘He is in my youngest sister's friendship group so I think Lucien knows them from Friday evening drinks.’

Eris gave a nod. ‘Azriel?’

‘You know them?’

‘I dated Mor briefly. A long time ago. Dated being a loose sense of the word. Both dates, her friend showed up and started giving me shit that I didn’t deserve her.’ He loosed a dismissive laugh and rose.

‘Was that friend a big bruiser called Cassian?’

Eris grimaced. ‘That’s the one. Oh no. That’s not your one?’

‘Bingo. In my defence, I hadn’t been in the city long and I wasn’t in a good place when we met.’

‘I’ll let you off,’ he said, ‘for your poor tastes. We all make mistakes.’

At the slide of the door, the dogs tried to push their way past Eris to Nesta, more eager with curiosity now rather than out for blood. She shielded herself with his body, making him laugh again. The sound was deep and warmed a part of her.  

‘They’re very friendly,’ he insisted, holding out his palm for one to sniff. ‘They’re just not accustomed to beautiful women stampeding through their garden.’ 

‘Desperate times call for desperate measures.’

Hesitantly, Nesta held out her hand. One dog pressed his wet nose to her palm then another nudged that one out of the way to get to her. They were all different breeds, some mixed, some with three legs or one eye. They were all the sorts of dogs that got dumped at a shelter when vet bills became too high.

Eris extended his arm for her to take. ‘If you need assistance today, feel free to use me. I know how they can be - but they can’t stand me. None of them will come near me so I don’t mind if you need to hide by me.’

Nesta slipped her arm into his as they walked across the lawn. ‘You’d be signing yourself up to a whole evening of my company. I won't leave your side.’ 

The smile he gave her was warm but there was a challenge in his eyes. ‘You say it like it’s a bad thing. Allow me to be your date for today.’ 

‘You’d pretend to be my boyfriend?’

‘I’ll pretend to be anything you want if it pisses them off.’

*** 

Eris was a knight in shining armour, sweeping Nesta away whenever they steered too close to the other group. He introduced her to a number for the Vanserra family friends - all of whom seemed to be rich and powerful enough for Nesta to wonder if Elain knew what she was getting herself into. He kept up a lie that they were dating. Both liked yoga, both were early morning people, neither drank, both preferred the autumn. It was easy to pretend when they were so similar. He blessed every pollen laced sneeze, guided her into the marquee when her allergies became too much and genuinely seemed to listen when she spoke. 

‘What is the difference between a fun accountant and a regular one then?’

Nesta sipped at her pink lemonade through a straw, keenly aware that Eris watched the movement of her lips. ‘A regular one is boring. I am a fun accountant because companies employ me to audit their accounts. I get to discover which CEO is wiring money to an offshore account in the Cayman Islands or who is skimming off the top for their retirement fund and blow the whistle thereby ruining their fun. There’s a lot of travel involved, but the money is good and I don’t have anybody waiting for me at home.’ 

‘Do you enjoy it?’

‘It’s not particularly thrilling but numbers are easy.’ She shrugged, ‘I spend a lot of time in hotels or on flights so I get to read and there’s little washing up to do.’

Thankfully at the buffet table, Elain had included a number of vegetarian dishes that Nesta could eat. For once it wasn’t a giant mushroom stuck between a bun. 

‘Oh, my father will have a field day if he finds out you're vegetarian,’ Eris snickered. ‘Although the large man at the other end of the marquee is staring at you as if you are dessert.’

Nesta didn’t even need to glance over her shoulder to know that Cassian was haunting her steps. She edged a few inches closer to Eris and then his arm slipped around her waist. 

‘Is this okay?’

‘Perfect,’ she murmured, nuzzling against him. 

They shared a plate, with Eris opting against any meat options for Nesta’s benefit and sat on a stone bench, hidden away from most of the party. Eris spoke of his work – and his father’s disappointment that he’d chosen architecture rather than law. He said that being paid to argue should have been his dream career making Nesta laugh then.

‘Thank you for saving me at the buffet.’

Eris smiled then pressed a hand over his heart. ‘A hardship I’m happy to undertake. A bad break up?’

‘Awful. Several attempts at breaking up. None of them registering with him. Lots of screaming matches. Lots of “quit your job, it’s emasculating me because you earn so much and I still live with my buddies and wake up hungover every weekend!”.’ 

‘It doesn’t sound like he’s changed since I knew them. And Morrigan?’

Nesta scrunched up her nose. ‘Oh, you mean, “babe, she’s like my sister! That’s why she sleeps in my bed and doesn’t like other girls talking to me” that Morrigan? The “we slept together once years ago, you’re being paranoid” Morrigan?’ 

The memories made Nesta shiver. She wasn’t asking to be put on a pedestal. What she wanted was to be considered ahead of Mor from time to time. Or for Mor not to be invited along for every occasion. Especially not to a weekend away on the coast. She’d shown up for Cassian’s birthday and the pair of them had shared the double bed in the hotel while Nesta slept on the couch. That had been the straw that broke the camel’s back.

‘Feyre is younger than Elain, isn’t she? And she’s already married to Rhys?’

Urgh. That also made Nesta’s skin crawl. Rhysand was fourteen years older than Feyre. She’d had one high school boyfriend then met him. Within a year, her twenty-one year old sister was married and pregnant. Feyre claimed she was happy as a stay-at-home mom with painting occupying her free time but Nesta saw her more as Rhysand’s trophy wife. That was an argument they’d had before and Rhys had demanded she leave his house. With pleasure, she’d snarled back.

‘Yes, I am the designated spinster of the family.’ Nesta swept her head into a bow. She picked up a small pastry filled with cheese and onion. ‘Cassian used to call this rabbit food. Told me to eat real food. Would always try to kiss me after he’d eaten a steak to piss me off.’

‘He’s a dick. There’s no other way to say it.’

A band had started up or at least, Nesta had thought it was. On closer inspection, five musicians were upon the stage playing light classical music, all in finely tailored clothing. A far more sophisticated affair than Elain and Lucien might have planned. It was definitely not their sort of thing so she wondered how much Lucien’s father had dominated the affair. Certainly the average age of the party was more suited to him than Lucien or Elain – and they were likely his own guests, business associates, clients, or potential clients.

‘Shall we dance?’

Nesta raised her eyebrows in surprise. A man who actually wanted to dance? ‘You’re suggesting this to give me a grope, I suppose?’

Eris tipped back his head with another easy laugh. ‘Is that on the cards? I wouldn’t refuse that. No, I like to dance. I thought you might too. Plus, Cassian and Mor are staring daggers at us so I thought we could have them frothing at the mouth before the evening is done.’

That was all the incentive she needed. Eris pulled her close, hand slipping into her own while another glided around her waist. His body was long and lean, capable of making her feel small without dwarfing her. 

After two songs of easy dancing, the tone changed to a slower one. Nesta wasn’t aware of who else was dancing or even who else was in the main marquee. When Eris drew her close enough for their bodies to be flush, all she cared about was her head that rested on his shoulder, the nose brushing against his neck as they danced, his broad hand on her bare back.

To onlookers, it would be cosy, romantic even. Eris allowed her to use him, she reminded herself as her arms enclosed around him. He made a murmur of contentment then his lips brushed against her brow. It shouldn’t have given her butterflies.

‘It’s no wonder Cassian cannot stop staring at you. You are the most beautiful woman in the room.’

She glanced up at Eris but there was nothing playful on his face. Nesta felt dizzy when she looked at him; the clean-shaven face, the hard set of his jaw and golden light in his eyes. He certainly was handsome. And her type. And happy for her to use him however she wanted that evening.

‘He didn’t deserve a moment of your time.’

They danced a little while longer until she hobbled to a table, the balls of her feet aching from her high heels. Warm hands undid the straps around them then Eris was putting his own shoes onto her bare feet, insisting he didn’t care if he wore socks. 

‘I’m the eldest,’ he explained, ‘Whatever I do is wrong. Who cares if I wear socks to a party at my own house? What matters more is that you aren’t in pain. I have crocs in the house if you’d prefer those.’

‘Only if they match my dress.’

His arm stayed around her shoulders as they observed the others dancing when the sun began setting. It was pretend, Nesta knew, but part of her enjoyed his touch. She liked when he murmured something in her ear, the timbre of his tone making her knees weak. She liked being able to burrow against him, so his warmth chased away the goosebumps on her skin.

‘Eris, you said you weren’t bringing a plus one.’ A beautiful woman in a sweeping green dress joined their table. Definitely Lucien’s mother from the russet eyes - which made her Eris’ mother too. ‘You’ve hidden her away rather than introducing us.’ 

Nesta was about to peel herself away from him and declare they were simply pretending to avoid their exes, but Eris tightened his grip around her shoulders. His thumb brushed against her skin.

‘Nesta is Elain’s older sister. We met a few weeks ago through work. I didn’t need a plus one when she was already attending.’ The lie rolled off his tongue so smoothly that Nesta almost believed it herself. ‘There hasn’t been time to introduce her properly plus we didn’t want to detract from Lucien and Elain’s party.’

Satisfied, his mother gave one sharp nod. ‘It’s so lovely to meet you. I’m Olivia.’ Her auburn hair was drawn into a loose bun and there were freckles across the bridge of her nose. She watched the dancers, eyes tracing over her youngest and Elain. Then, she said with a smile, ‘Perhaps we’ll celebrate your engagement next.’

Nesta nearly choked on her drink, but Eris handled it. ‘When we marry, we are eloping in Vegas. Less fuss.’

He stroked his hand across Nesta’s face, the motion so delicate and caring she almost wanted to run off to a chapel with him. 

They ended up at the same table for dinner. She was introduced to more Vanserra brothers - each one either brown or red haired with dark eyes. They spoke crassly of women who were in attendance in a manner Nesta was used to from her work though Eris chided them and apologised. They’d all likely end up as CEOs of companies through their father’s contacts rather than merit.

When it came to the speeches, Nesta’s hands began trembling. Public speaking had never bothered her. She could speak to anybody and never cared for their opinion. But this was somehow different. This was talking about her sister - her favourite person in the world - in front of a bunch of strangers. This would reflect on Elain. She barely listened to Beron speak or Lucien then suddenly all eyes were on her. Somebody had introduced her as the next speaker. Eris gave her a nudge.

‘For those of you who haven’t had the displeasure of coming across me, I am Nesta - Elain’s oldest sister.’ A murmur of laughter from Rhys and Feyre. ‘When our mother died, I kept Elain close. I became fiercely protective of her which poor Lucien found out early on. She came home from work to tell me about a lovely man who bought a bunch of flowers every day from her, who always asked her opinion on the colour scheme and arrangement, and how lucky his girlfriend must be to have a considerate man like him. I had my suspicions. No man buys flowers every day unless he’s constantly in trouble or he wanted an excuse to speak to the beautiful florist.’

Elain and Lucien beamed at each other, both utterly enamoured.

‘We lost our father young and our mother even younger, but I am so proud of who you have become – the way you have grown – despite it all, Elain. You and Lucien are perfect for each other. Your love has been a joy to watch bloom. And I know that Lucien will make you happy. Lucien, just so you know, you will need to find another florist to buy flowers from when you are in trouble.’

There was a ripple of laughter around the room and Lucien gave a sheepish smile to Elain.

‘Any man that can withstand my interrogations without crumbling is worthy of my little sister. To Elain and Lucien.’

A flood of adrenaline washed through Nesta once the speech was done and a toast had been made. Eris squeezed her hand beneath the table. ‘Beautiful speech. Well done.’

***

The alcohol had set in for many, once night had taken hold. A band had arrived, replacing the musicians, playing more upbeat music and current songs. She danced again with Eris; the man insisted on remaining in his socks even as the cotton stuck to the sticky dance floor. He was an easy partner, twirling her, keeping her steady or drawing her in so their bodies brushed against each other. How much of it was faking, she wasn’t sure of because they were both grinning no matter who watched them.

A child cried repeatedly. It became harder and harder to ignore that cry. It was her nephew, tired and miserable, up far past his bed time. Feyre’s cheeks were dotted with colour as she struggled with Nyx. He arched his back, throwing his head back. Rhys took over with no luck.

‘Would you be mad if I swapped you for my nephew?’

‘Have us both,’ Eris said simply, taking her hand and leading her towards the group.

Before any of them could pass a comment on her date for the evening, Nesta extended her arms to Nyx. ‘Come on.’

Those teary blue eyes recognised her and he held out his arms to be taken from Rhys. Feyre sagged with relief.

‘Would you mind? Just for a little while. He’s cutting his back teeth. He won’t settle.’

‘It’s fine,’ Nesta said, avoiding Cassian’s gaze as he tried to get her attention. ‘Enjoy yourself. Has he eaten?’

‘He won’t eat anything,’ Feyre complained.

‘All he’s done is cry,’ Mor muttered.

Eris snorted. ‘I can’t blame him with this company. Shall we go, Nesta?’

A hand was on the small of her back, guiding them away before a swift rebuttal could come. Nyx still grizzled in her arms, tugging at a lock of her hair that he’d pulled out of her coronet even as they weaved their way out.

‘Why is he dressed like somebody’s uncle?’ Eris murmured as they exited the marquee.

Nyx had been stuffed into a tweed suit complete with a waistcoat and bowtie. The night air was cool, but his cheeks were red from teething and crying. Why hadn’t they hired a babysitter and kept him at home – or taken him home early?

Nesta sat on a bench – the same one they’d eaten together on – and began stripping him off. Eris folded each item she handed to him until Nyx was only in a vest and diaper. The relief was instant. He stopped grumbling and flopped his head against Nesta’s breasts. He was the only male allowed to do such a thing. She swept his sweaty black hair out of his face.  

Eris lifted Nyx’s foot, inspecting his wiggling toes for a moment then blew on them. The sensation must have tickled him because he tried to jerk away from Eris’ touch. It only spurred him on and soon Nyx was giggling in her lap and kicking his legs away from Eris.

‘First born. Lots of practise,’ he explained.

Nesta knew the feeling. Their father worked non-stop leaving Nesta in charge the majority of the time. He’d never once learned how to do their hair, leaving that to Nesta too. She was the one who pinned up the weekly plan on the fridge detailing when each child had which club after school though as soon as she got her license, Nesta was the one doing pick ups and drop offs. Her life hadn’t much changed after her father’s death. She was already self-sufficient, working and studying. Financially, Nesta did her best to support Elain and Feyre too, but their father’s money quickly ran out when they realised how many gambling debts that he’d racked up on his business trips. Feyre wouldn’t hear a bad word about him – and Nesta had to wonder if that’s why she married a wealthy older man so quickly.

‘I have the perfect remedy for a teething baby.’ 

Eris gestured for her to follow him. He weaved through the crowds easily, reaching his hand behind him to guide them all the way to his annexe. Every now and then he’d check over his shoulder and pause to pull them both a little closer.

In his freezer, Eris pulled out homemade ice lollies made of puréed fruit. 

‘You make these?’

He blushed slightly. ‘I try to be healthy but I have a major sweet tooth. Can he have one?’ 

Nyx was already reaching out his hand for it. Nesta had cemented her position as his favourite adult by being the fun one who gave him sugar, so an ice lolly before bed wouldn’t hurt. 

‘Berries or apple and kiwi?’ Eris asked. Nyx reached for the green one. ‘Would you like one?’

‘No, you can have it.’

Eris’ face lit up and he dragged his tongue up the length of it. 

They sat outside of his house where a couple of the dogs had come to greet them. Nyx watched them with curiosity as he dribbled cold juice down his chin. Eris didn’t hesitate to retrieve a tissue from Nesta’s handbag to clean him. Her heart almost exploded from her chest at the sight of it. A man who liked children and had a good job and was handsome and single. It didn’t seem possible. He was too good to be true.

He snapped a few pictures of Nesta and her nephew on his phone, smiling at them as he swiped through.

‘We don’t have to pretend here.’

‘Maybe I like pretending with you,’ he admitted. ‘Can I show him the dogs?’

Nyx went to him readily. Eris squatted down, balancing the baby on his knee as a hobbling chocolate Labrador with a grey muzzle greeted them. A small hand reached out.

‘Gently,’ Nesta encouraged. 

Eris held onto Nyx’s hand, guiding him as he stroked the various dogs that came over for a fuss. One with a face like it had ran into a wall kept licking Nesta’s bare calf until she was giggling and tugging her legs up out of the way. 

They stayed that way for a while, neither talking much as Nyx’s eyelids grew heavy. The sound of the band was faint, carrying to Eris’ garden on the breeze. The Vanserras were wealthy beyond belief but Lucien was a nice man - and Eris seemed to be the same way. 

‘Why are you single?’ She blurted out.

Eris cocked his head to the side. A light wind blew strands of his auburn hair. Nyx had his cheek pressed to Eris’ chest, blinking heavily at Nesta. A small hand wrapped around Eris’ index finger.

‘Several reasons. One – I tend not to go out as many women are interested in my surname or my family’s wealth. Two – I’m a bit of a workaholic. Three – A woman has to like all twelve of my dogs. Four – my father is an absolute bastard and I don’t want any woman exposed to that. Do you need any more?’

‘Five – your bone structure will make any woman envious,’ Nesta said, brushing her thumb against his chiselled cheek bone.

She considered what Eris had said. Her mind had leapt to Elain and what she was letting herself in for with a father-in-law who cared little for the damage left in his wake as long as he profited. Elain could be sensitive, taking comments to heart. She had to hope that Lucien would step between them if anything occurred. Nesta glanced sidelong at Eris. Twelve dogs wasn’t a dealbreaker. She was a workaholic. She also didn’t like meeting men or one-night stands. No, it was silly to think that way. Silly to consider what Eris had said. They were only pretending so that Cassian would leave her alone.

‘He’s asleep,’ Nesta whispered, smoothing Nyx’s black hair from his forehead. 

Eris had him cradled against his chest, so that a chubby arm dangled down. His mouth was open, deep in slumber. The sugar had the opposite effect, but at least her nephew was content now. 

‘Do you want children?’

Eris raised his chin, grinning slightly. ‘Are you offering? It might take a few tries but the practise is most of the fun.’

Her cheeks scorched and Nesta could not look him in the eye. What could she reply to that? Nothing. Her tongue was in a knot. Eris nudged her with his elbow, grinning again. 

‘You’re even more beautiful when you blush.’

‘Stop pretending.’

‘You think I’d lie? You wound me.’ His hand stroked the back of Nyx’s head softly, smoothing down the curling ends of it. 

Nesta shuffled closer to Eris then he draped his arm around her waist. She couldn’t say how long they stayed there for simply enjoying the quiet of a summer night. 

‘We can pretend again at the wedding if you like.’

‘I would like that,’ she confirmed. The thought of being a bridesmaid in a yellow dress on a hot beach and ensuring everything went smoothly for Elain’s day was already stressing Nesta – but if Cassian was leering at her or trying to cause an argument, her temper might go into overdrive.

‘I’d be happy to be your shield again.’

‘More than a shield, you’ve been my hero today.’ She stretched out her legs, making the too big shoes on her feet wobble. Eris had been wonderful. ‘Sprinting across your lawn chased by a pack of dogs and breaking into your house has got to be one of the best decisions I’ve made this year.’

‘In fairness to you, the door was unlocked.’ Eris leaned towards her and kissed her cheek. ‘You know that if you catch the bouquet at the wedding, my mother will ensure we get married.’

Nesta winked. ‘I’ll do my best to catch it then.’