#poor baby Nesta :(
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Nesta haters being the dumbest people ever, part. 19379272
the video for whoever wants to see
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I really don’t understand the hate towards Rhysand for being an asshole towards Nesta.
(Let me justify myself)
YES, Rhysand is harsh on her, but fucking ADMIT IT, Nesta was a bitch to him and Feyre for the time he knew her. In his perspective Nesta didn’t care for Feyre, only used her, and was overly rude towards her. Essentially, RHYSAND’S DISLIKE TOWARDS NESTA IS JUSTIFIED.
That doesn’t at all excuse his actions or behavior and it most certainly does not excuse Nesta’s behavior either, even if she hated herself.
You shouldn’t glorify someone by bringing down another, and not without acknowledging EVERY aspect. You can dislike him all you like, but don’t actually hate him for caring about Feyre and not liking people who treated her badly.
edit: BTW, this post is directed solely to everyone who complains abt Rhys over how he treats Nesta. I am absolutely NOT defending Rhys from the way he treats others. Like, I mean the mask he wears for everyone outside the IC.
#I wanted to ramble#sorry 😔#idk the hate towards him is so funny#like you hate him for not being polite towards the person who treated his mate badly?#did I write too much? probably!!#acotar#acomaf#acowar#acofas#acosf#Sarah j Maas#anti Rhysand is actually so funny#oh noo#he wasn’t nice to Nesta for the way she treated Feyre?#poor baby Nesta :(#its almost like it’s the consequences of your actions?!?!
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I wish Nesta had gotten a monster form.
I feel like it would have been very therapeutic for her to transform into something that reflected how she felt on the inside.
Something that scared and horrified and roared or hissed so that when she transformed back she didn't see her normal self as a monster anymore.
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just thinking about the fact that her beauty has always been used against her and that she has always been torn down for it and in fact she has dangerously abysmal self esteem
#brought to you as i write this reply for neo that's silly goofy and nesta is having internal crises as usual#i know this is 'boohoo poor pretty privilege' of her#but also consider: she is my baby#it starts with her mother of course!#and then every single person after that#both men and non-men!!!!!!!!#anyway someone take her to see barbie she will absolutely bawl and have many a revelation
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How come I haven’t seen anyone talk about how Castles Crumbling is Nesta’s song
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Eris would've actually doubled it and suggest an even more colourful and ornate ceremony than what she originally asked for
Nesta said, “I want a disgustingly ornate mating ceremony.”
He laughed, pulling away. “Really?”
“Why not?”
“Because I’ll never hear the end of it from Azriel and Mor.” Or the Illyrians.
Nesta, run. Your husband cares more about the opinions of his 500 year throuple situationship than what you want for your wedding
#he matches her freak#he'll go “sure my love. in fact let's add even more ornaments and flowers here. you deserve it”#anyway#one can dream#poor nesta baby you didn't deserve that#I would bend backwards to give her the most ornament wedding ever and this guy's first thought is whatever his buddies think?#the world is unfair#anti nessian#neris#nesta archeron#cassian#cassian critical#pro nesta archeron
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My Poor Shadowsinger
Azriel x reader
A/n: I saw this post on twitter of Rogue carrying Gambit and it said ‘can’t let the bros know I’m cool with this’ or something like that. Anyway it immediately made me think of the babying Az hc I wrote and I couldn’t focus on anything else until I wrote this.
Warnings: mentions of injuries
Now that Madja was gone and his brother’s fussing was over Azriel could finally relax. His latest mission was fairly easy, that was until the last day. It’s always the last day. Azriel had won the fight easily, the male who attacked him clearly didn’t know how to fight, just throwing his muscular body around, hoping to land a blow.
Not that Az would admit this but he got cocky, too cocky. The bastard got him with his long knife leaving a wide gash across his chest.
Azriel relaxed into his mountain of pillows, letting his eyes finally rest. Of course right at that moment the front door slammed opened, followed by your worried voice yelling at Rhys. Azriel sat up in anticipation of you entering his room. Bursting through the door with Cass and Rhys on your heels you stop on the threshold.
Dropping your bag you rest your hands above your heart, your face contorted in worry. Your eyes scanning the bandages wrapped around his strong chest. “Oh Azzy,” you say breathless. Rhys opens his mouth to tell you Azriel is fine but Cassian grasped his shoulder. The smirk on his face telling Rhys that he wanted to see how this went.
You rush over to his bed, sitting on your knees next to him, holding his head to your chest. Placing kisses all over his face and head you sway him gently. “Are you ok baby? I was so scared when Rhys told me you came home hurt.” leaning back you run your hands over his shoulders gently, making sure to not pull at the bandages.
To your surprise Az leaned into you, accepting your loving attention. Not caring that his brothers were watching on. Resting his head against your chest again and wrapping his arms around your middle. “I’m ok, it just stings a lot.” You let out a sympathetic sound, running your hands through his dark hair.
“You poor thing. Rhys,” you turn to the High Lord with a slight scowl on your face, “why didn’t you tell me he was in pain?” Cassian and Rhys couldn’t believe what they were hearing. Their jaws open wide in shock. “I-he, are you kidding? He said he was fine! Az even kicked us out because he said ‘stop babying me, I’m a full grown male!’” Rhys complained.
Cassian was speechless. He couldn’t believe his brother was acting this way.
You let out a sound of disgust, untangling yourself from Azriel’s vice like hold. “Lay back Az,” you say in a soft tone, adjusting his pillows so he can be comfortable. “Are you hungry? What can I get you baby?” You coo at him while brushing his hair back from his slightly warm forehead. You click your tongue at the warmth. “Ugh and you’re warm, did Madja give you something to fight off a potential fever?”
Az nods against his pillows, “It’s downstairs will you get it for me? And can I have that sandwich that you always make, and maybe some soup?” His voice small and a slight pout on his plump lips. “Of course baby. I’ll be right back.” You kiss the pout from his lips and make your way downstairs with a disapproving look at Rhys.
They all watch you leave. Once you’re down the stairs Rhys and Cass walk over to the end of Azriel’s bed. The High Lord places his hands on his hips giving Azriel an exasperated look. “You are unbelievable.” All Azriel does is smirk at his brother, bringing his arms to rest behind his head. “Don’t lie, you let Feyre and Nesta baby you two.” His brothers scoff at the accusation.
“Nesta would never.” Cassian says dramatically. Rhys purses his lips and shakes his head. “Run along now,” Az says teasingly. “Let me enjoy my pampering in peace brothers.” Rhys shakes his head again as the pair laugh while leaving.
#acotar#acotar fanfiction#acotar reader fic#acotar reader imagine#acotar imagine#azriel x reader#azriel acotar#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x you#azriel fluff#azriel fic#azriel imagine#azriel fanfic#acotar azriel#azriel#azriel blurb
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hello helloooo! I’m back with another fic idea if it interests you ✨so little Nyx is old enough to go to school maybe like kindergarten-ish age? And one day the IC is eating dinner and Nyx is like “I have a mate!” And obviously he doesn’t but still Rhys and Feyre are like WTF and then read his little bby mind and find out he’s just infatuated with his teacher. (Nyx gave her a cookie that he baked with the help of Elain which she ate and now he thinks they’re mates bc he’s too young to understand that that’s not how it works) and then during a school carnival or gathering or cute kindergarten level graduation the IC attends with Nyx and ofc Azriel is there. He doesn’t even know who Nyx’s teacher is but then he sees Nyx dragging a young female over to him where he introduces her to him, proudly saying “this is my mate!” And she just laughs but then the bond snaps for her and Azriel. And then fluff ensues from there with everyone trying to explain to Nyx that she’s not his mate and that she’s Azriel’s to which he takes forever to understand. He keeps trying to give her treats and flowers so that they’ll somehow be mates. Azriel becomes public enemy #1 in Nyx’s eyes because he stole her from him. And then fast forward to when Nyx is older, maybe finally with a mate of his own and they tell him the story at his wedding and he’s so embarrassed about it. could def see this as an OC fic but x reader works just as well!
Infatuation
I love writing little baby Nyx 🥺🥺🥺
Warnings - Nyx being a bit of a menace to society *well Az*
Nyx was beaming. Bouncing as he ate his dinner, little wings flapping every so often.
It wasn't unusual. Being surrounded by this much love, this much joy, this much devotion had made the little heir the happiest of babies, then a happy toddler, and now a happy 5 year old.
He picked up his little cup, sucking on the straw and took a big drink as Rhysand and Feyre shared a look. He set it back down with a satisfied lip smack and went back to his mashed potatoes.
"Alright, I'll bite," Cassian put his knife down. "What happened at school today?"
"I met my mate," Rhysand's face dropped at his son's little confession. "And she's perfect, and nice, and prettier than mommy."
Feyre hid her laugher behind a mask of concern before gently digging into Nyx's head.
There, as Nyx thought about his mate, was Miss Arianna, legs crossed as she read to them on the floor. Her black hair was tied up in two buns with pieces framing her face. She had a big smile on her lips as she read in different voices from the children's book.
Feyre and Rhys, despite their status, sat on a waiting list to have Nyx in her lessons. She was highly sought after, her students were all advanced for their little ages, and she allowed time in their schedules for naps. Something many teachers felt was unnecessary.
Rhys had loved you the moment he made the choice to ignore his morals and enter your mind during their interview.
You didn't care who they were.
You didn't care about their status.
You cared about the faelings.
You took children from every walk of life in Velaris. The poor, the rich, high fae, low fae. It didn't matter to you.
Rhys and Feyre both shared a look and chuckled. "And who is your mate, Nyx?"
He sighed with a dreamy look in his eyes, mind now flashing to you comforting him after he got hurt at recess, "Miss Arianna. I gave her a cookie, and we shared it, so I'm a taken male now."
Nesta had her hand over her mouth, eyes sparkling. "Well," Cassian started before a slap came to his thigh, warning him to let Rhys and Feyre take care of this gently. "You did better than Auntie Ness. She offered me a stale biscuit."
"Your mom made me a can of soup. Worse can of soup I've ever had. Lucien, what did Elain give you?"
Lucien smirked and leaned back, hand on Elain's pregnant stomach. "A five course meal with dessert."
They were all hoping Nyx would understand the implications of what they were saying, but the far-off look and content sigh told them he didn't.
A few weeks later, the inner circle and all of their partners and mates were at the school's end of the year celebration.
The grass had been packed with games, little events for the children, vendors charging nothing for sweets and foods at the kindness and generosity of the High Lord and Lady.
Nyx had long abandoned his family. Opting to run and play with his friends. Cassian and Nesta stood with their daughter, looking over the schools information sheets and the application to join Miss Arianna's class for next year.
"Mommy!" Feyre turned at the voice, beginning to laugh as Nyx dragged his teacher behind him. "Mommy! You were supposed to be behind me!" The heir tapped his foot, Miss Arianna looking away as she hid her smile at his little antics. "I had to bring her all the way over here!"
Arianna and Feyre held eye contact both of their eyes sparkling and knowing where this was going. "Mommy, this is my wife and mate, Miss Arianna," he pulled her to Mor and Emerie first. "This is my Auntie Mor and her wife Emerie." He didn't wait before ripping her to Amren and Varian. "Aunite Amren and Varian. You'll like Auntie Amren. She's real smart." She was pulled to Rhys next. The two adults shook their heads, smiling. "This is daddy. You can call him.... uh. Daddy?" He pulled her to Cassian and Nesta. "Auntie Ness and Uncle Cass," he looked around brow knit in confusion. "Where's Uncle Az and Clarissa?"
Rhys patted his head. "Ris wanted cotton candy, so Az took her to get cotton candy. Why don't you go play too? Then we can talk to your wife."
They watched as Nyx ran off. Clearly not looking to play but trying to find his missing uncle. "I tried telling him, but he's so attached to the idea of us spending the rest of our lives together that he doesn't fully understand."
They all laughed. "We tried too. He told us that we didn't understand."
"Strange. He said to me that the bond didn't snap right away for you either, High Lady, so he'd find the Suriel to tell me, and I'd feel it after that."
A soft pout came to Feyre's lips. "He doesn't understand why you won't be their teacher next year."
Arianna's face fell, the fine features morphing into sadness and longing. "I introduced them to Alexios and even had him sit and answer questions during round up day. I can talk to him. I'm so sorry. I wish I could keep them until higher level learning. We just-"
Feyre hugged her, stopping the unneeded apology. "We know. Cassian and Nesta were hoping to get Clarissa in your class."
"And we were hoping to hire you for private tutoring," Rhys, like his son, was not ready to let Her go. He had spent countless nights looking for ways to keep Nyx in her classes. "We would pay you well."
"That wouldn't be necessary," she turned to Cassian and Nesta, a big smile on her face. "Would you like to see my room? I'll have a different theme next year, but it will give you an idea of my environment."
"Lead the way," Cassian held Nesta close. Watching the two females interact, inserting questions as they walked into her classroom.
The Inner Circle all went to find food and place to eat, enjoying the small screams of joy and laughter around them. "She's really pretty," Emerie started slowly. "Maybe we should hook her up with Azriel. He hasn't dated since Gwyn."
Varian visibly flinched at the mentioned of Gwyn. "Does he still hate Tarquin?"
"Yes," they all answered together.
Azriel joined them seconds later. He was carrying Risa and holding Nyx's hand. "She crashed. Where's Cass? I'm going to take her home?"
Rhys motioned towards the schoolhouse, pulling Nyx to him and telling him to sit and eat. "Arianna offered them a tour of the classroom. A quiet place out of the sun might perk our niece back up, too."
Azriel nodded, carrying the small illyrian into the school house and following his shadows. He could hear melodic laughter and Cassian's loud voice, pausing at the doorway as his niece stirred and snuggled back into him, whispering for daddy. "He's right here, princess."
Nesta motioned for Azriel to join her. His jaw dropped at the sight of the classroom. It was a domed open glass ceiling, but the second it he entered, it began filtering light. "It knows she's sleeping," that voice had his shadows dancing. "I enchanted my room for my students so they're always in a comfortable environment. Never too bright, hot, or cold."
The room was filled with toys and exotic stuffed animals for snuggling. It was decorated like a rain forest from the continent, and an occasional call of something wild could be heard. "I suppose you enchanted all of this too?"
Azriel didn't look her direction, a look of shock and amazement going Nesta's way. Lady Death nodded eagerly, her eyes almost watering. She'd be heartbroken if Clarissa wasn't here next year, Azriel realized.
"Is this the little potential enrollee?" She walked over to Azriel, and nothing else was heard in the room. They didn't hear Cassian or Nesta respond, they no longer heard the soft sounds of animals and birds calling in the distance.
It was like everything in Azriel's life fell onto a new axis.
Arianna was his mate. The female he'd spent forever looking for.
And his nephew was obsessed with her.
Arianna spoke first, "We can't tell Nyx."
Azriel nodded. "I'll get banished to Mother knows where if we do."
Cassian looked between them before smiling, "Did you just secure my daughter's spot in her class? What kind of Aunt wouldn't teach her niece?"
Nesta smacked him hard, smiling from ear to ear. "Have dinner with us tonight? We share one of Rhys' and Feyre's houses with Azriel. He could fly you up for dinner, and we could all get to know each other."
"Only if you want that," Azriel nodded the second the sentence left her lips. "As, am I allowed to be blunt now?" They all nodded. "I was going to take her regardless," she turned to Nesta. "Morrigan scares me. It's why I took Nyx, too."
Arianna held Azriel's hand tight as they walked to the Riverhouse.
They had spent the summer getting to know each other. Going to coffee, to dinner, on long walks along the Sindra. It had taken all of a month for the two of them to decide this was serious, and they both wanted to move forward with the bond.
But that meant telling Nyx, who was still very much infatuated with her.
Azriel sighed as he grabbed the handle, "Ready?"
She nodded, hand stick folded delicately on his bicep. "Only if you are."
Azriel pushed the door to the lavish home open, smiling at Rhys and Feyre, who were waiting for them. They, Cassian, Nesta, and Azriel, had all decided the best way to do this was over a full family dinner.
"Uncle Az!" The shadoesinger stiffened. He had thought they would at least get to the table before the little heir appeared, but the Mother must have had other plans.
He came bounding into the room before stopping at the doorway with a loud gasp.
Azriel had never felt more like chopped liver as Nyx ran to his mate, hugging her legs. "Uncle Az brought my wife to dinner, Daddy!"
Rhysand scratched the stubble he had allowed to grow out due to his days being spent caring for Nyx as Feyre sat the throne. "We should all go sit on the couch, buddy. We need to talk about something."
Arianna allowed Nyx to pull her with him, looking back at Azriel with tears in her eyes.
He had discovered during their time together she had a Cauldron gift, one that had never been trained and just thought of as a personality trait. Arianna was an empath. She felt the emotions of others so deeply and could manipulate them if she tried.
It explained why she was so attached to children and them to her.
It also made her very useful in stressful situations. "Just breathe," Azriel mouthed as they all followed.
"Oh shit," Nesta whispered quietly. "We're doing this now?"
Rhys nodded. His eyes were already lining with silver as he sat across from Nyx with Azriel on one side and Feyre on the other.
The room was very quiet until Azriel spoke. "Nyx, Miss Arianna and I really need to tell you something, and we need you to try to stay calm." The shadowsinger sent a silent prayer to whatever Gods would listen and watched as one of his shadows held Arianna's free hand.
"Miss Arianna is my mate. I asked her to marry me."
The heir's face morphed into a little look of betrayal, his eyes starting to water as Rhysand and him held eye contact. "She's my mate, though."
Nyx looked at Feyre, hoping for support before looking back to a defeated Rhys. "I'm sorry, buddy, but She's Uncle Azriel's mate. Do you remember me telling you about the thread that connects me to Mommy?"
The heir cuddled closer into Arianna, glaring hard towards Azriel. "Why are you so mean?"
Feyre gasped at the question, immediately grabbing Azriel's hand. "Nyx!"
"He's trying to steal my wife!"
Arianna was in tears. The heirs emotions were overwhelming. She took over the conversation, blocking everyone from Nyx by taking both hands and sitting on the coffee table. "Nyx, honey, I'm so sorry, but Az and I are mates," they all felt the small tinge of magic shift. "I know this is hard for you. Your feelings are so valid, and it's difficult when you feel something this deeply to let go of that notion. It's hard processing such big emotions."
She wiped one of his tears. "Your mate is out there, hun. And she's wonderful, kind, smart, and closer in age than I am to you. You two will have so much more in common, and you will find joy and happiness in her that you never will in me."
"But she won't be you," Nyx sobbed heavily. "We're supposed to spend forever together."
She smiled softly. "And we will. You will always have me in your life. We will always be friends."
He glared towards Azriel, and Arianna turned his little head towards her. "You are hurting his feelings. Uncle Az loves you. We've spent a lot of time talking about how to handle this because he knew it would upset you, and it hurts his heart to see you so sad. You don't want to hurt Az. I can see if in your little face."
Nyx still glared at Az. "What if you two break up?"
"You'll be the first to know, bud," Azriel said softly.
"Good."
"Good," Azriel repeated.
"Fine."
"Fine," the heir smiled as his Uncle teased him.
It was then that Nyx decided to dive on Azriel, the Illyrian coming out of them as he started a tickle fight. "She was mine first!"
Azriel was laughing, holding the smiling boy close to him and allowing him to win. "And now she can be our. We can make her go places with us, bug her while we fight with our training swords, do pranks."
The heir stopped, that dimpled smile coming back out. "Prankies?"
Arianna's face fell as everyone started laughing. "Wait. What?"
Azriel smiled at her, sending her his love as Nyx whispered in his ear.
"We good?" She mouthed to him. He nodded, holding Nyx close. She stood to go comfort Rhys and Feyre, only for a shadow to trip her. "AZRIEL!"
The heir and shadowsinger ran off laughing as the other couples watched Arianna with shared grins, "Don't worry, sweetness," Cassian helped her up. "They're just getting started."
.General tag list:@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanager
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Bluebird — Azriel x Reader — Part IX
Summary: Deciding to accept Azriel's offer, Reader's world as they know it is about to change. In more ways than one.
Click here to be added to the Bluebird Taglist! Please remember to check your settings and make sure you can be tagged! 💕
Word Count: 8.5k
Warnings: Some suggestions of smut and heavy petting, but nothing too major!
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Azriel stared out of the huge wall-length windows of the River House, watching shadows move in the sunlight that bathed the estate.
He hadn’t been to bed.
In the mere hours since he’d left the human realm, leaving Y/N, their conversation and his offer behind…his mind was too crowded to sleep.
So he’d come to the River House, wind still clinging to his skin and clothes from hours of aimlessly flying, and found his family gathering for breakfast.
“Where have you been?” Cassian had asked him.
“Just flying.” Had been Azriel’s explanation. The questioning looks he’d earned in response had told him they all suspected something more was going on with him.
And how right they were. He didn’t know why he was being cagey, why he couldn’t just be open with them about the human woman who had utterly captivated him—
It was scary, he supposed. To step out of the bubble they had around them, just the two of them.
But if Y/N did agree to come across the Wall with him…it was time to be open, honest.
As if on cue, a kick landed on his shin. Amren.
“Cassian is supposed to be the absentminded one, shadowsinger,” she drawled. “Are you present?”
Cassian grinned at the jibe. “Someone’s grumpy because she’s hungry. Poor baby.” His eyes slid to Azriel, ignoring Amren’s glare. “Our miniature friend is right, though. What are you daydreaming about?”
Azriel became acutely aware of every present pair of eyes on him. Rhys’s. Feyre’s. Cassian’s and Mor’s, Amren’s and Elain’s. If Nesta had been present, she’d probably have stared, too.
Az cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. Never comfortable with so much attention on him. “There…uh…”
Rhys frowned, realising, at once, that whatever this was held weight. “Az?” he angled his head.
He must have been pale, because Feyre frowned and asked, “Azriel, are you well?”
He didn’t know why he was fumbling this so much. Perhaps because for all he loved his family, for all he’d stared centuries down with them, his feelings were things that he’d always kept tightly locked away, and they had respected that. If he wanted them to know something, they would know. If not, they wouldn’t ask. It was how it had always been.
But this was different.
He was serious about Y/N, and his first step in proving that was to tell those closest to him about her.
He cleared his throat again, bracing his arms on the table. “There’s something I want you all to know.”
“We all know you have the biggest wingspan, boy,” Amren speared a slice of melon. “It’s hardly breakfast conversation—”
“Amren.” Mor cut her off brusquely. She was staring intently at Az. Could tell this wasn’t the time for jokes. “Go ahead, Az.”
Azriel clenched his fists at his sides. “I…I have fallen for someone,” he swallowed a lump down, far out of his comfort zone. “I’ve fallen in love with someone. A woman. A human woman.”
Silence.
The faces of his family gazed back at him, a mosaic of expressions varying from surprise to confusion to the twitching of baffled amusement. They were waiting for an explanation, or some indication that this was a rare, random joke that Azriel had decided to crack. And Az found that he couldn’t bear them considering that. He squared his shoulders, the severity not moving from his face.
“Her name his Y/N,” he continued, heart thudding in his chest. “She hails from a village in the human lands, and she’s magnificent. She helps run her father’s inn. She plays piano stunningly…” stop talking, stop talking, stop talking. Facts were just spilling from his lips, dumping themselves on his friends. He clamped his lips shut, squeezing his hands together again.
And once more, silence.
Until Cassian peered closely at him and stated, “You’re not joking, are you?”
The shadowsinger shook his head. “No.”
Rhysand’s chair creaked as he sat up straight. “Well…how did you meet this woman?”
“When you sent me to the human lands to get an idea of the unrest there. I heard her playing piano late at night and I…I went back to hear more. And I kept going back, despite you telling me not to. I’m sorry for going against your order, Rhys, but I’m not sorry for the reason that I did.”
The High Lord and Lady shared a glance, clearly communicating mind-to-mind. Az wasn’t sure he wanted to know what they were saying.
Mor cleared her throat, coaxing Az’s eyes to her beautiful face. There was kindness there, warmth. “And you say you love her, Az?”
“I do, Mor. Since I first met her, I’ve fallen harder and harder.” His cheeks burned a furious red. “I can’t deny that that is what I’m feeling. And that’s why I want to share this with you all.”
The initial shock seemed to dissipate a little as shoulders around the table relaxed. Mor smiled broadly, and Cassian quickly followed.
“No way,” the Illyrian General chirped. “That’s amazing, Az.”
“We’re happy for you, Az, of course,” Feyre added. “Just a little surprised.”
“You should bring her here to meet us,” Amren grinned, flashing white teeth. “If she can hack it.”
Her remark was as close as she would come to congratulating Azriel — but the sentiment was there, hidden amongst the words.
Of them all, Elain was the only one who hadn’t spoken.
And Az…Az, for some reason, avoided looking at her.
“Funny you should say that, Amren,” he quickly said. “I’ve invited her to come here tonight, after she’s closed up the inn. I want her to see Velaris at night, in all its brilliance.”
“So we’ll get to meet her,” Mor grinned wider. “This is great—”
“If—if she’s available to come, that is.” The shadowsinger quickly cut in.
Because he had to be realistic and still consider the possibility that Y/N would reject his offer. And if that was the case…well, he couldn’t bear to think of it right now.
He certainly couldn’t bear to share that particular detail with the others. Not just yet.
“Well,” Rhys offered a smile, “if she is available, we’ll be delighted to meet her, Az. Really.”
“Yes,” Elain’s voice, soft and unconvincing, finally drifted around the table. “We will.”
At the same moment, Azriel’s gaze drifted to take her in. She looked…shocked. Perhaps a little perturbed.
But for what reason? She and Lucien were giving things a go. Shouldn’t Azriel be able to do the same?
He tore his eyes away from her, dipping his chin in quiet acknowledgement of her comment. That was all he could offer right then.
“I hope she comes,” Feyre commented, sipping her drink. Her voice was bright, enthusiastic.
“So do I,” Azriel agreed.
Gods, he really did.
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Ale sloshed over the lip of a tankard, joining the smattering of droplets that were already coating the floor and making it sticky. The rowdy men in your line of sight didn’t seem to notice the mess they were making amidst their rowdiness. They’d been here a good few hours, now. Their eyes had long turned glazed, their speech slurred.
It was all background noise.
Background noise, as you stood behind the bar, staring into space. Time was ticking by, the clock hands crawling steadily closer to when Azriel would arrive and wait for you with hope.
Ten o’clock chimed. Two hours to go. Were you going to join him? You weren’t sure. You’d been contemplating it the entire day, on so few hours sleep. You’d gone through the motions, done your jobs, been that normal, plain young woman who was in charge of The Bluebird Inn. You’d compiled pros and cons in your head, the list of them growing with each thought.
Pros and cons, however, seemed not to come into a situation driven so heavily by desire.
You wanted to believe Azriel so badly — believe that he was good. Was it so out of the question that such a thing could be the case? It didn’t diminish what you had seen out on the road with your father, but…
But after weeks of no contact, having Azriel close enough to touch last night…it had you hoping, once more, that both things could be true. That the world was not so black and white, and there was colour out there, a world of colour that Azriel could fly you right into—
Before you realised what you were doing, your hand was grasping the bell behind the bar. You tugged at the rope, causing a distinct ringing to cut through the arrogant raucous of the men.
“Last orders!” you called.
Every pair of eyes swivelled to blink at you. “What?” One man asked.
“Last orders,” you repeated.
“But it’s only ten o’clock! You don’t close until midnight!”
It was an effort not to roll your eyes. This group had been here since they’d stumbled in from their day’s work. The idea of cutting their drinking short was inconceivable to them.
But you were going. You were going to join Azriel, and go across the Wall, and experience things you’d never experienced, whether it was a good idea or not.
“I’m closing early tonight,” you gave a shrug.
The brute that had been spilling ale all over the floor gaped at you. “Why?”
Good question. You couldn’t exactly tell them the truth, and if this was going to get back to your father, you at least needed a valid excuse—
“I’m unwell,” you tried unconvincingly. “Sorry.”
Swine-like eyes narrowed on you. “You don’t look unwell, girl.”
“…It’s my cycle.”
A silent pause. And then, in an instant, every man in the room was on his feet. You tried not to smile in triumph; it worked every time.
They couldn’t leave quick enough, as though, if you truly were on your cycle, it was somehow contagious. You saw the last customer out of the door and bolted it shut. Waited until their chatter disappeared into the distance before you turned and began a frantic cleanup mission.
This was…mad. Truly, thrillingly mad. A reckoning of sorts, you imagined, because crossing that boundary from one realm into another was like sealing a fate. There was no coming back from this — this, that was not merely dipping your toe into the world of the fae, but submerging yourself in it, taking a deep gulp of air and disappearing beneath its surface. A nerve-wracking prospect, but…also an exciting one.
And didn’t it prove to you that you still trusted Azriel at least a little? You had to, surely, to be so willing to take his hand and let him pull you into the unknown.
Perhaps…perhaps you were tired of having that little bit of doubt. Tired of wondering what might be out there, beyond your meagre existence. This trip would surely put those doubts to bed, one way or another.
Two hours until Azriel’s arrival seemed both too much time and not enough at all. You filled it with your usual closing duties, making quick work of tidying up and making sure the inn was spotless. Afterwards, you would ordinarily spend some time at the piano, or simply retire to bed. Tonight, your feet carried you upstairs to get ready.
You combed your hair and changed your outfit choice too many times, not once recognising the girl who stared back at you in the mirror. She was somebody bold and daring — somebody willing to question what she’d always known.
And you wanted to be her, no matter the fears twisting your stomach.
Once ready, there wasn’t much time left to wait. You quelled your nerves by knocking back a glass of whiskey and welcoming the burn. Your eyes stayed on the clock. Eleven-thirty. Thirty-five. Forty. Fifty-five.
When you heard the distant chimes of the village clock announcing midnight, you felt that familiar sensation of awareness. Like an ember under your skin, it burned, and it spread.
You wiped whiskey from your lips and slipped out of the door, stepping into the courtyard. You were cold, despite the warm night.
And even colder when you felt the gust of air that came from a descending figure, landing feather-light in front of you.
Azriel was almost too beautiful to bear.
You stared at him with an intensity you couldn’t keep a lid on. And he stared back at you, took in your shirt and breeches, your braided back hair, your shoes. He clocked within a second that you were dressed to go out — a breath of relief forced its way out of him.
“You’re coming?” he breathed, and then shook his head, seeming to remember his manners. “Sorry. Hello.”
You swallowed. “Hello.”
He paused. Dared a step closer. “I half expected to find you in your nightgown. Or to not see you at all.”
“I…contemplated it. Not coming, I mean.”
Another step. “And what tipped the scales in my favour?”
You sucked in a breath, inhaling his scent. He was close enough to touch, now, and the smell of wind mixed with his natural aroma, creating a dizzying concoction that, for a moment, had you forgetting how to speak.
You shook yourself out of it, blinking a few times. “I think I’m tired. Tired of…only knowing what I’ve been told. I think it’s time I saw things for myself.”
Azriel’s broad shoulders seemed to relax a little. A beat passed of heavy silence, heavy eye contact. He stared at you like you were the only person left in the entire world.
And then you jolted just a little, as cold, scarred fingers touched yours in a light, tentative brush. He waited to see if you would pull away.
You didn’t.
Those fingers explored more. Wrapped around yours. Laced with yours. And then Azriel was holding your hand in his.
“Let me share my world with you,” he whispered.
Maybe it was the weight of his hand, or maybe the raw pleading in his tone. Whatever it was…you knew you didn’t need any more time to consider.
“Yes.” Was all you managed to respond. “Yes.”
Just like that, Azriel was yanking you closer, pulling your body flush to his. You waited to feel your feet leave the ground, for him to lift you into the air.
It took you a moment to register that his arms were winding around you tightly in an embrace. That it was a hug he’d so fiercely pulled you into.
He held you, both firmly and gently, his chin pressed to the top of your head, his hand cradling the back of it. You were stunned, stiff as a statue — but then you were sinking into his hold and welcoming its security, its…passion.
“I can’t tell you how relieved I am,” Azriel murmured, pulling back to gaze at you. “Truly — thank you. For trusting me with this.”
“I haven’t made any decisions yet,” you pointed out. “I just want to see for myself…if what you’re saying is true.”
But even as you spoke, you knew it wasn’t that simple. Heading across the Wall with Azriel was sealing a fate far bigger than you’d stopped to consider. Whether you were ready for it was anyone’s guess.
The shadowsinger took your words in his stride, nodding. His hand found yours again. “Shall we go?”
You were really doing this. The idea made your head spin.
But you did not pull away. You did not run back inside, no matter how much a tiny part of you screamed at you to do so. Perhaps you were stronger than that now.
“Yes,” you nodded, and braced yourself. “We shall.”
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Flying was precisely as you remembered — exhilarating and terrifying and cold. The night sky eddied past you in a star-streaked blur, and you were soaring, hurtling forwards towards a world unknown.
You and Azriel did not speak. He seemed content to leave you in your thoughts, though you felt his gaze on you more than once, drinking you in. You couldn’t help wondering what he was thinking. Whether he deliberately chose to press you firmly against him and rub soothing circles into the small of your back, or whether it was a subconscious thing.
You closed your eyes at one point, focusing on the feeling of the chilled wind on your face.
But it was another feeling that had you suddenly alert. Opening your eyes again.
It was hard to explain, but…something like a staticky charge crackled and sparked. You knew that the Wall was not a physical thing to behold, but rather an invisible barrier…yet somehow, you knew that was what you were feeling. Like a huge sign in bold, screaming at you: TURN BACK. DO NOT COME ANY CLOSER.
“I can feel it, too,” Azriel spoke into your ear, as though he’d read your thoughts. It was the first words that had left him since he’d carried you to the skies, and they were soothing and warm against you. “It’s the magic. Those who built the Wall abhorred the idea of humans and fae alike crossing over. I think the feeling it offsets is supposed to repel people.”
You held onto him a little tighter as the feeling grew stronger. “Clearly it doesn’t work.”
“No.” His eyes found yours. “Not when there are such enticing reasons to cross.”
You were thankful that the wind put a stop to the furious blush that crept up your neck. You stared forward, and Azriel’s arms tightened around you, and you knew that you were about delve into another realm.
“Ready?” he murmured, before that charge thrust its way through your body like a bolt of lightning.
It was brief and yet nauseating. Your stomach lurched, your head spinning. And then, as if clearing fog, it was gone. You had the distinct feeling of being someplace completely alien — a place where the grass was greener, the scents richer. A place where magic was the blood in its veins, snaking through the ground beneath you and breathing vibrant life into the land.
But you had barely a chance to take in your surroundings before Azriel was coaxing your eyes back to him.
“Now that we’re in Prythian,” he said, seeming to visibly relax, “I’ll winnow us from here.”
You gave the briefest glance to your surroundings — a forest so like the many in the human realm, and yet also something more. The thrum of dangerous life seemed to lurk just beneath its surface, and with the moon bearing down on you, you didn’t much like the idea of waiting around to see what might emerge from the dark. You dipped your head into a nod, and Azriel’s arms tightened around you.
But before he could make a move, you were speaking, stopping him in his tracks. “There’s something I don’t understand.”
He paused, head angling curiously. It made a few dark hairs slide across his forehead, and the urge to reach out and touch the silken strands was a burning one.
“What’s that?” he asked.
“You want to show me your home, but why show me at night time, when the world is asleep?” Besides the fact that this was the only time you could sneak away from the prying eyes of villagers.
But Azriel’s mouth seemed to lift into a subtle, beautiful smile. One that was telling — but telling of what?
“Velaris does not sleep,” he said, and then you were disappearing into starlight.
A brief burst of darkness that lurched you from place to another. The feeling of both flying and falling, of being nowhere and everywhere all at once. And then your feet were suddenly on solid ground.
You didn’t realise you’d closed your eyes until the sounds hit you first. Distant music, mingled with crisp laughter. The sounds of enjoyment, fulfilment. You snapped your gaze open to put a picture to what you were hearing.
You went so preternaturally still, you could almost be mistaken as fae.
You must have been perched upon a viewpoint, to see the city in its entirety like this — but not too far up to miss the details. Restaurants teeming with activity both inside and out front, gatherings of customers who talked and smiled and laughed without a care in the world. Vendors selling their wares despite the late hour, peddling anything from food to wooden carvings to flowers. People wrapped in each other’s arms and dancing merrily to a song that a young female strummed on a lute in the busy street.
If not for the dark blanket of stars above your head, you could be forgiven for thinking it was daytime. Your shoddy little village was never this bright nor light, no matter the hour on the clock.
This was Velaris, and it truly did not sleep.
You stared and stared and stared, for so long that your vision began to blur and smear the lights below into swirling shapes. It was almost easy to forget you were alone, just you observing this beautiful, seemingly perfect world. But a hand touched your arm.
“Would you like to take a walk?” Azriel asked, coaxing you to look at him.
Such palpable hope sat within his gaze that you couldn’t bear to look away. And when you nodded your agreement, that hope shifted into damn near elation.
The city seemed to welcome you into its arms as you began a slow stroll right through the heart of it. Azriel gave you your space, always remaining a few paces away. You could have sworn, in your periphery, that you caught him clenching his hands now and then, as though he didn’t know what to do with them. As though all he wanted was to reach out to you.
But he left you to acquaint yourself with the sights and sounds and sensations of Velaris. Never had you been amongst so many fae, and you half expected them to sniff out your mortality, to turn and stare or even make a grab for you. If they noticed you were not one of them, they paid it no mind, barely casting you a glance. Some of them greeted Azriel cheerily as they made merry and socialised. Not a drop of misery seemed to taint the blood of this living, pulsing place.
You came to a stop on a grand bridge that arched over a glinting river, its waters stretching further out than your human vision could comprehend. Only a moment after you leaned against the carved balustrade, Azriel was emerging in your peripheral vision, stopping beside you and mirroring your stance.
You could feel his gaze on you. And after a moment, he asked, “How are you feeling?”
A slow, stunned shake of your head was all you could manage. That was a question that had many different answers. You weren’t sure which one to give.
But you found yourself turning to him, your brow pinched, lips parted. “I don’t understand how any of this works. What…what is this place?”
Velaris, obviously — you knew that much. But was the entire fae realm like this? Was this what had been hiding on the other side of the Wall in the centuries since it was established?
Azriel seemed to think on your question for a moment, combing through his answer. He angled his body towards yours, the way his hands twisted around each other hinting that he was…nervous.
“When I took you flying the first time, I mentioned that Prythian is divided into seven courts,” he explained slowly. “Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter, Dawn, Day and Night. Do you remember what else I told you?”
How could you forget? You’d turned it over in your mind enough that the words had begun to fray at the seams.
“You said you’re from the Night Court. That you’re part of the High Lord’s inner circle. You’re his spymaster.” Your gaze swept around. “So this is the Night Court.”
Azriel dipped his chin. “It is. But it’s a city in the Night Court. A secret, guarded city. There’s more out there than just this.”
“Secret and guarded? Why?”
For a moment, silence stretched between you that felt as long as the winding bridge. You found yourself focusing on the ebb and flow of the water beneath you, watching its languid dance. Until warm fingers landed on your arm.
The touch — tentative and gentle — coaxed your gaze back to Azriel. You studied him, drank in the sincerity and openness on his face. This was hard for him, you realised — to be so forward, to bare all. He was, perhaps, as guarded and secretive as this city itself. Perhaps more.
But his soft hazel eyes told you that he wanted to push through that difficulty. For you.
“It’s secret and guarded,” he answered huskily, “because it is beautiful and good, and the entirety of the Night Court is not. The entirety of Prythian is not. There are other places like this, of vibrancy and love and light, and then there are places of pure, evil darkness. Places that I would never dream of you venturing. They exist as truly as the good places do. As Velaris does.”
Once again, your eyes took in the area around you. On the other side of the bridge, a couple were hunched over a table, in their own world, sharing quiet words and quick kisses. A few buildings down, a group of friends roared with laughter as they spilled out of the door, arms around each other and happiness on their faces.
This place was beautiful. It was…life.
And the existence of darker places did not change that, did not steal its essence. Good and bad both simply existed. In people, and in places.
Just like in the human lands.
Just like Azriel had been trying to tell you all along.
“There’s good and bad everywhere…” you murmured quietly, the words sinking in, hitting home. How could you deny it when the people here clearly were not scared, not running and screaming and begging for their lives?
There was movement, and you felt Azriel’s side press against yours. “There is.”
And you could see it now, like a fog had been lifted. But there was still one pressing question that plagued you. One you couldn’t tamp down on as you angled yourself towards Azriel proper.
“Why bother, though?” you asked, studying him. “Why go to these lengths to prove this to me? You don’t owe me anything. Why…why would you bother taking the time to make me see this?”
Azriel gazed back at you, something burning in his eyes. He pursed his lips, like he was trying to force his words back down, trying to stop them spilling out.
A fight he ultimately lost.
“Because I am selfish,” he said, staring at you fiercely. “And I couldn’t bear the thought of not being able to see you anymore. Of you thinking I’m a monster. I would not care if anyone else were to think so, but…”
“…but what?”
“But not my Bluebird.” His voice was raw, raspy. He reached out cautiously, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “Not my Blue.”
A breath shuddered out of you, and with it went your resolve. You knew you could no longer fight what been pressing you for a while, now. Could no longer deny what was right in front of you.
You cleared your throat, feeling the shivers that pulsed through your skin with Azriel’s hand still hovering so close to it. So badly, you wanted to lean into it. But you forced your gaze back to the brilliant city of Velaris.
“Life seems so lovely here,” you admitted, your voice surprisingly hoarse.
“It is,” Azriel concurred. “It really is. And you, Y/N…you deserve loveliness.”
You stared fiercely at the water, begging yourself not to get choked up. You’d never had loveliness.
A warm, comforting hand pressed against the small of your back. You shamelessly allowed it to.
“Would you like to meet my family?” the shadowsinger asked.
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You were going to be sick — and not from the flying.
Your feet touched down on a beautiful, ornate estate — grass trimmed and decorated with fountains, ornaments, decorative hedges. Trees and obscure plants and beautiful flowers. Never had you been anywhere so grand.
And before you — a huge, stunning house of pillars, winding staircases, giant windows and just…pure opulence. It intimidated you just to look at.
“This is…this is where they live? Your…High Lord and High Lady?” The words felt foreign on your tongue.
“It is.” As Azriel stepped up to your side, you realised his arm was still wrapped around you. “Did I ever tell you she used to be human — my High Lady?”
Your gaze shot to him in a flash. “What? How is that possible?”
“It’s a long, elaborate story that I’ll allow her to tell you, when she feels like it. But it’s true — she and her two sisters were once human, and they were all turned fae.”
A thought that set your heart thudding at a gallop. Had they once been lowly village girls, like you were? You hadn’t considered that you might have anything in common with these people.
“Shall we?” Azriel’s arm tightened around you, and you welcomed it. You needed the grounding comfort.
With a deep breath and a nod, you allowed yourself to be led up the broad stone steps that trailed up to the mammoth front entrance. You followed Azriel’s lead, wide-eyed as he opened the front door like it was his home, also, and led you inside.
The interior was, unsurprisingly, as decadent as the exterior, but you found yourself too nervous to take in any details beyond polished marble flooring and huge, painted portraits that hung on the wall of beautiful beings. You did, however, stop to take in the portrait that was undoubtedly Azriel.
“Feyre — our High Lady — is an artist.” Azriel stopped beside you. “She painted all of these.”
“And a damn excellent artist, too.” Behind you, a voice of pure, cloaked night echoed through the giant room. It added with a hint of glimmering humour, “Not that I’m biased, of course.”
You turned at once, knowing that such a voice could never come from a human. Your heart almost stopped at the sight of the male who leaned against a carved arch, and you blushed furiously at the thought that he could probably hear such a thing.
He certainly resembled Azriel, in his golden skin and dark hair. But his eyes were of a stark, peculiar shade — violet — and his ears very much pointed. Something about the smug ease with which he stood screamed at you that this — this was the High Lord of the Night Court, looking regal in a black button-up shirt and dark trousers.
And beside him, a woman — female — of such otherworldly beauty, it was hard to imagine that her golden-brown hair and blue eyes had ever been dulled by mortality.
“He is biased,” she said with a soft smile, fondness in her eyes. She drank in the sight of you, and there was no judgement, no disapproval — just simple curiosity. “Y/N. Welcome to our home.”
“This is Rhysand and Feyre,” Azriel explained beside you. “High Lord and High Lady.”
“Rhysand?” The High Lord echoed jovially. “You sound like Feyre when she tells me off. Just Rhys will do,” he sketched you a flourishing bow, “and as my beautiful mate said — welcome to our home.”
“I…I’m afraid I don’t know the customs, where greeting a High Lord or Lady is concerned,” you cleared your throat. “But thank you for having me.”
Feyre smiled warmly. “You’re very welcome. Shall we get a drink? The others are waiting.”
Your stomach turned with nerves, but you nodded. As Azriel stepped forward, falling into stride with Rhysand, Feyre stayed behind, turning to you.
“It’s nerve-wracking, isn’t it?” she smiled at you gently. “I had already been turned fae when I first came here, but…I can’t imagine coming here as a human who’s never had much to do with our kind.”
Our kind. Clearly her mortal roots were but a distant memory.
“It is,” you agreed. “This is…hugely out of my comfort zone.”
“Just stick with me, Y/N. But you have nothing to worry about.” Her smile grew. “We’re all just happy that Azriel has found someone. Even Elain.”
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Even Elain. What the hell did that even mean?
It stuck in your mind as you held yourself through introductions, your curiosity such that you were waiting for an Elain to be introduced to. But through the names that were thrown at you — Cassian, Amren, Morrigan, Nesta — that one did not come up.
The tiny Amren was terrifying despite her small stature, and yet you found her quick wit and remarks to be personable. Morrigan — Mor — had invited you to sit with her the second the introductions were over, and she seemed almost…excited by your presence. Cassian was jovial, warm, quickly making it clear that he would joke and banter with you as much as he would with his family.
Ironic, then, that the least forthcoming with any warmth was Nesta — who surely could relate to your humanity, even if her own was long gone.
She’d barely spoken to you beyond a terse greeting. And since then, she’d stared you down from the other end of the table. You couldn’t help noticing that her eyes continuously darted to the round edges of your ears. You couldn’t read the ferocity in her gaze.
It was an effort to ignore it as conversation bloomed around the table.
“So he was just hovering above your inn like a little creep?” Cassian’s broad grin was savage, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he plied you with questions. “You should have shot him down with an arrow. Taught him a lesson.”
Your lips twitched as you answered, “Somebody else saw to that. I just ended up helping him.”
“Boo.” The Illyrian warrior snorted. “How boring.”
Beside you, Azriel rolled his eyes, but a soft smile played on his lips that told you he rather enjoyed the teasing. You couldn’t help relaxing at the…normality of it all. How easy and light and warm this conversation was.
How naive you had been, to assume that the fae were simply cold, severe beings. The furthest thing from this loving family unit. It didn’t even seem to be a bizarre circumstance to them, that they had been gathered to meet at such a late hour. If not for the huge windows letting the night sky in, you’d be forgiven for thinking that their energy and enthusiasm was indicative of day time.
“From which village do you hail, Y/N?” Feyre asked you, sipping from her wine. You’d tried not to stare too long at the casual intimacy between the High Lord and Lady — the little touches you so naturally wanted to mimic with the male beside you. She added, “Perhaps Nesta and I would have heard of it.”
At that, Nesta lifted her chin a little. You could have sworn a glimmer of curiosity streaked through her eyes, there and gone in an instant.
“Northern Swancross.” You answered, eyes darting around the opulent dining room. “It isn’t anything grand. “Most of its residents are living in poverty.”
Feyre sipped her drink, offering an understanding nod. “Perhaps too far north for us. I don’t recognise the name—”
“I do,” Nesta said sharply — the first time she’d really spoken to you. “I remember reading a pamphlet once, about fae attacks on human villages. Northern Swancross was named in regards to an attack there a couple of decades ago.”
Silence and stillness filled the space that conversation had lit up moments before. Your mouth went dry. You felt the cool touch of a shadow caressing your arm.
“That would have been my mother,” you answered, clearing your throat.
Nesta stared at you a long moment, a slither of what seemed to be…solidarity…seeping through the cracks of her icy reception. She lowered her chin in the slightest of dips, and somehow, you knew exactly what that minute gesture communicated. We have both suffered at the hands of the fae. And yet, somehow, here we both are.
“That’s awful,” Rhysand’s voice cut through the moment, quiet and laced with sympathy. “I’m sorry for the loss of your mother. We all are.”
You nodded. “Thank you.”
“Nesta, Elain and I also lost our mother,” Feyre supplied. “To illness, rather than to the fae. But we understand what the loss of a parent is like. Many of us here do.”
A kind and heartbreaking sentiment, and yet all you could focus on was the mention of that name again. Elain. She must have been the third sister.
You didn’t know why you felt such preying curiosity about her standing in this group…or her standing with Azriel, and why her support for his happiness was a thing Feyre felt was worth mentioning. You couldn’t stop yourself wondering if her absence was a deliberate thing.
As if she’d read that thought, Feyre cleared her throat. “You’ll have to forgive Elain’s absence. She’s not much of a night owl.”
“Despite living in the Night Court,” Cassian added, and his booming chuckle at once chased away the tension that had seeped into the room. He grabbed the bottle of wine and refilled his glass. “So tell us more about you, Y/N.”
You did exactly that — and found yourself peculiarly willing to do so. Such a sheltered life you’d lived with no one to truly call a friend, that it now seemed that years of pent-up conversation came flooding out of you. And as hours ticked by, pedalling closer towards morning, you found yourself relaxing, forgetting that you were human and they were fae. They were just…people. Kind, good people.
And in turn for the information you shared with them, they told you about themselves, answered your questions, explained things you didn’t understand. Mor spoke to you like she’d known you for years rather than minutes. Even Nesta’s reservedness began to thin into something more cordial. One-by-one, the High Lord’s Inner Circle pulled you into its fold as if a place for you had been carved there for a very long time.
They did not balk — not even a little — at the idea of you being of worth in Azriel’s life.
Azriel himself was largely quiet throughout the night. He seemed to take a backseat and allow you to navigate this situation as you saw fit, only interjecting with comments and responses every now and then. But at your side, he remained a solid, steadfast presence, his shadows a thing of comfort. And the urge to lean against him as the night wore on was a pressing, growing one.
You didn’t want to resist anymore. Didn’t want to take a step backwards. You’d seen what he’d wanted to show you, and there were no more weak excuses you could come up with as to why your involvement with Azriel was a bad idea.
You wanted him…and you were done denying yourself him.
It was only when the night drew to a close that you began to feel the tiredness waiting on the edges of your mind. Nesta was the first to leave, and soon after that, everyone else was standing and saying their goodbyes.
“You’ll come back soon?” Feyre asked you, her hands squeezing yours. She seemed genuinely thrilled that Azriel had brought you here.
You glanced at the shadowsinger beside you, a smile playing on your lips. “If he’s willing to bring me.”
A soft, low chuckle sounded in Azriel’s chest. But there was nothing comical about the way he promised, “Whenever you want.”
Bidding the High Lord and Lady goodnight, you descended the front steps with a lightness that you hadn’t felt upon arrival. Tonight had been…easy. Simple. There was nothing more to it than merely getting to know Azriel’s friends. Getting to know Azriel’s world.
And when the doors closed behind you, it was just you and him alone, for the first time in hours.
He strolled at your side, back through the opulent front garden. Neither of you seemed to know who would speak first.
Until you turned to him and said, “Thank you for bringing me here.”
Az stared back at you, pausing for the slightest of moments. “To the River House?”
“And to Velaris. To…to Prythian.” You, too, paused. “To the truth, I suppose.”
His chin dipped just slightly. “You deserve the truth.”
A few paces forward, you walked in silence. It wasn’t until you were under the canopy of a huge, overhanging tree that you pressed your back against the trunk and allowed yourself to stare at him. Properly stare at him. To take in his beauty.
He stopped a few steps away, asking, “What?”
So many things you wanted to say. I’m done fighting this. I’m done fighting us. I want to dive further into this world with you. I want you, Azriel, whatever the hell that means for me—
“Who is Elain?” The words spilled, unplanned and undignified, from your lips. Your eyes shuttered for a moment as you regained your composure. “I mean…I know who she is. I know she’s Feyre’s and Nesta’s sister. I just mean…who is she…to you?”
Azriel was still for a moment, his brow pinching slightly. He took a step closer. “She’s…a friend.”
“…just a friend?”
“I…I won’t deny that I wondered, at one time, if she might be more than that.” His scent hit you as he continued to step closer. “But she has a mate. And I wondered that before…before I met you.”
The bark of the tree bit into your back as you held yourself firmly, grounding yourself in the moment. You inhaled a small breath, trying to ignore the dizziness that his general proximity seemed to provoke. But as he stepped closer still, now mere inches from you, you knew you were fighting a losing battle.
Still, you lifted your chin and stared up at him. Stared, as he closed the gap between your two bodies and pressed you further against that tree, his body seeming to line perfectly with yours despite your height difference. His breath tickled your neck as he leaned into your ear.
“Were you worried about that, Blue?” he asked huskily, a smile in his voice.
You couldn’t control the way your breath hitched in your throat. Lie, save face, deny it, your mind screamed at you. You weren’t sure you currently had the mental capacity to do so.
“You said you’ve had lovers,” you rasped back. “I was just wondering if, perchance, Elain had been one of them.”
A mix of both relief and disappointment filled you as Azriel pulled back — not far, but simply enough to stare sincerely into your eyes. His face was open and soft, despite the teasing that had been in his tone.
“No.” His tone was a promise. “Elain has never been my lover. I don’t…I don’t want you to worry about that. About her.”
Your shoulders relaxed just slightly. But as your gaze began to lower from his, his hand was suddenly at your face, cupping your jaw, holding your attention firmly on him.
“It’s been a long, heavy night for you,” he murmured, studying you closely. “I want you to tell me honestly how you’re feeling.”
Perhaps the most loaded question he could have asked. You swallowed, slowly shaking your head. “I…I’m feeling lots of things. Relief…that what you told me about this place was true. Shame…that I was obstinate in my ignorance—”
“You do not need to feel one bit of shame. There are always two sides of the coin—”
“And fear. I feel scared.”
Your words lingered between the two of you, truthful and unwavering. They were out in the open, now. You found yourself not wanting to keep them to yourself.
“I feel scared,” you repeated, “because I have nothing to hide behind, now. I can’t run and deny what I feel. You’ve shown me the truth, and I…I can no longer deny my own.”
His hand still cupping your face, Azriel brushed his thumb over your cheek. His eyes remained fully trained on you, not willing to look away for a second.
“There is no going back from this night,” you whispered, staring back at him. “And I’m glad about that. But I’m also so scared.”
“I don’t ever want you to feel scared. Not with me.” His hushed words, spoken quietly for your ears only, landed on your lips. “I just want to make you happy, Blue.”
It took a moment for you to realise that the soft noise that sounded — a small cry of both relief and need — came from you. You couldn’t hold yourself back any longer. You were done with resisting.
Your hand cupped the back of Azriel’s head, and you pulled it down, slanting your mouth over his. At once, he hummed against your lips and moved his hands to your waist, pulling you closer against him.
This was everything. Azriel was everything. He just wanted to make you happy, and you wanted to make him happy, too. He was not fae or a shadowsinger or a huge, imposing figure with wings. He was just Azriel. Your Azriel. Your salvation.
The male you were so, so glad to have been proved wrong about. The male you were falling in love with.
Your tongue pressed against the seam of his lips, and he parted them for you, allowing you to dip inside. At once, his taste mingled with yours, and you moaned softly, your hands grasping at him, wanting to feel him against you as you kissed him harder, fiercer.
And he kissed you back just as ferociously. You may have been inexperienced, but you knew the taste of desire on his tongue, and you knew exactly what you were feeling when he hardened against you, his arms banded around you.
“Blue,” he broke away, panting. His eyes were glazed as he stared down at you, his chest rising and falling heavily. “We’re getting carried away. Tell me what you want. I need to know what you want.”
Him. All of him. Every single inch of him.
Your eyes trailed down to the hardness that was unmistakably outlined through his leathers. Such stark hunger bolted through you that it sent shivers coursing down your spine. Had wetness pooling between your legs.
And from the way Azriel’s nostrils flared, and a deep, guttural noise vibrated in his chest, you could only guess that he’d scented it.
You pushed up onto your toes, brushing another kiss to your mouth. A light one that he seemed ready to get lost in, before you were pulling away, your eyes clashing with his again.
“I want you to take me back to my home,” you told him breathlessly, your fingers biting into his leathers. “And I want you to stay.”
✧: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚
Not one bit of the journey was memorable. Not the flight back to the Wall, or that brief flash of darkness as you were winnowed from there, right back into the taproom at the Bluebird Inn.
Your only focus was on Azriel. The feel of his body pressed against yours, and how…how it would feel even better when you both rid yourself of clothing.
And gods, you were nervous. But you could feel in your very bones — you were ready.
This night had, indeed, been a reckoning. This night had, indeed, changed things forever, and made you realise that you had no good reason to deny yourself of the brilliant fae male who consumed your every thought.
You trusted Azriel. You wanted Azriel.
And when both your feet and his touched the wooden flooring of the inn, your eyes clashed only momentarily with his before you were pulling his face down to kiss you. And kiss you, he did.
It was hot and greedy and desperate, a kiss that could wait no longer. He made a low noise against your mouth, his hands finding your hips as he walked you backwards and pressed you against the bar. It was tongue and touching and too many clothes, and you were done waiting, done thinking, as you dragged a trembling hand down the firm feel of his leathers, down and down until you were cautiously folding your palm over the bulge in his pants.
You had no idea what exactly you were doing, but the way Azriel gasped against your lips seemed to be a positive reaction. One that only spurred you on further.
Even without properly seeing him, you could tell he was huge. Your hand barely fit over what pressed through his breeches. You explored the length of him, wishing that clothes weren’t in the way. That it was just skin on skin.
Azriel let out a choked moan — one that seemed pleasurable. Until he pulled away.
“Wait, Blue,” he panted, staring down at you. “Just…tell me you’re sure.”
You had gone past sure. Sure wasn’t a strong enough word. Sure was nothing against the certainty that roared in your veins.
“I am,” you promised, applying pressure with your hand. “Show me…show me what to do, Azriel.”
It was a pure, animalistic growl that broke from him then, and in one swift movement, he was lifting you up and carrying you over to the bar, perching you atop and slotting himself between your legs.
“I’m going to make you feel so good,” he kissed you. Kissed you again. Kissed you harder. “I promise, my bluebird.”
“Please,” you begged softly, grasping at his leathers. “I want you.”
Kisses deepened, turned more ferocious. Hands wandered, began roaming, exploring. You felt the cautious touch of a hand gliding over your breast, warm fingers permeating your shirt. You gasped, arching into the touch.
Perhaps that was why you didn’t hear it. Perhaps you were so distracted, so hungry for the male before you, that the quiet footsteps that approached were heard by neither of you. Not even by Azriel’s fae senses, his shadows.
No, you were both oblivious until a cold, stern voice filled the room.
“Y/N?” Devin stood against the doorframe, not taking his eyes off Azriel’s giant form. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
✧: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚
bluebird tags: @kennedy-brooke @rosessndri @anae-naea-zacheria @iambored24601 @sirenpearldust @v3lv3tf0x @lupinswolfsbanes @alohaangels @feyretopia @janebirkln @a-dizzle777 @moonbirde @natashachelsea @navyblue-eternity @multi-reader @sfhsgrad-blog @makemeurvillain @lyinginameadow @101crows @bsenpai @honeyandhalfmoons @florencemtrash @ssmay123 @historygeekqueen @mika-no-sekai-blog @ktsskgzxlu @basicbittywitty @mybestfriendmademe @cali-flow3r @lalachat @honeybeeboobaa @azrielsbbg @eatinggummybearsisacrime @ilovemangomorethanu @rhysandorian @coralseacourt @berryzxx @pequeno-atlas @secretlyhers @grimoiregrl @just-jess-losers @happywolves81 @anama-cara @spideytingley @raccooninurwalls @despoinasstuff @ntimacy @brekkershadowsinger @ariaaira @lesehexe @aunicornmademedoit @fauxdette @moonlight-kr @sekiro1310 @fightmedraco @astarlitsoul @quinzzelx
#azriel#azriel fanfic#azriel acotar#azriel x reader#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#acotar fandom#acotar x reader#acotar writing#acotar fanfic#acotar headcanon#acotar smut#acotar series#acomaf#acowar#acofas#acosf#azriel angst#azriel shadowsinger#azriel shadowsinger x reader#reader insert#azriel fic#acourtofwhatthefuck#bluebird#spymaster
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Your closed mind and all your poisonous hatred are appaling, but I would let it slip if you didn't just insulted me.
Do you feel better being a bully?
What's wrong with saying that all the hard feelings you have, all the poisonous venom you spit is harmful? Does bullying me make you feel better?
Your "you can enjoy..." than procedes to insult me is the real issue here, and show how much abusive you are. Do you think it's healthy expressing yourself the way you did?
Look at yourself in the mirror before judging others, right now you are an abusers worse than the person you're calling out to be.
Now...
You speak like you possess some sort of fundamental truth and that you're the only right pov where in fact you don't. So calm down, all this hate you feel is not my problem, and expressing yourself in this way, without actually being open to different opinions shows how arid and poor is your soul.
Domestic abuse is a whole different thing than what you're calling out, educate yourself on what it really is and be respectful. It's a serious issue and the way you're being superficial about it show how you much you have to learn.
You conveniently forget to add real facts to your equation and taking down Nesta, using her as a weapon against everyone else is just disgusting and the worse abusive behaviour ever.
"made his day brighter" is a sentence that isn't in the book, Cassian never said it neither thought it.
Cassian never restricted what she had to ear. With just a toast she would have faint and give her a nutritious and protein meal instead of a soft slice of toast, seems to me the thought of someone who cares. Also encouraging her to eat the chocolate cake even if it would give her only little energy, shows clearly that Cassian wants to help her, not change her diet or make her lose more weight. Also the house thinks about what to feed Nesta and the fact that Cassian wanted to wake her up to get something to eat and not to skip a meal is not a bad thing.
Cassian made sure that nothing could happened to her when she was walking home, keeping a distance and for nine months he was away from her, the fact that Amren took her to the party where they met and exchanged a few words is not to be blamed on Cassian.
A warrior like Cassian, an Illyrian with an incredibly fine hear would have noticed if Nesta was going to jump and he wouldn't let her die if she jumped. His main purpose is actually to help the woman.
No training, no learning about the Valkyries and their Mind-Stilling would help. Nothing would help. So she could wait for the water. Because to stop was to allow those thoughts in.
Nesta has a canteen filled with water, she chooses not to drink. Cassian play no part in her decision.
Nesta asked Cassian to, Cassian satisfied her, what would she do if refused? What’s the matter that Nesta is attracted to a man who loves her? Consensus is the basis of everything and every time Cassian asks for it and it’s always Nesta to decide, when she says no, he accepts it. Sex with Cassian finally helped her, sleeping with a different man every night, completely drunk, she herself says she didn’t like it and doesn’t miss it. Sex with Cassian is different and does no harm to her.
Nesta got better thanks to Gwyn, Emerie and Cassian too, but she got better because she saw she could fight for herself, she wanted to fight for herself, she would never learned that if Cassian constantly defended her. He gave her all the tools to help herself and this helped her to fight for herself.
Decontestualizing things, not giving them the proper background just to manipulate them and make them fit your "theories" is so poor and a toxic behaviour.
Azriel never said it, you can't be 100% sure about that. What if he just packed all the necessary for the hike for both of them? For multiple days? Plate, food, clothes maybe, we don't know aren't exactly a feather...
And yet the two of them are friends. At the very end they are good friend.
Feyre wants her sister to get better, if she kindly asked her to move to HoW Nesta would never accept, but that kind of life was ruining her. Nesta was not imprisoned, she was free to make the stairs and go to the city. And Elain wanted only to help Nesta, yes it was a low blow for Nesta, but it was love and concern for her condition that made them act so. They haven't bad intention with her.
Nesta's power is stronger than Rhys's he couldn't violate her mind, It is not certain, we are not told that Rhys has forcibly entered her mind. Later on he kindly ask her to talk.
Morrigan just expressed her opinion on this and there is no law against threatening people, Nesta had just given bad news to Feyre and she was upset, The fact that Rhys does not tolerate that his partner suffers and wants to make suffer who caused that pain, is not evil, but it is love towards Feyre.
I'm saying that spitting your venom isn't healty for your person, having all this bas feelings, it's easier to hate than to understand, but all the hate you're spitting is poisoning just you.
Real and Fake stans exist, real stans litterally understand the charachters, their choices, the situation and the people around them, the one they choose to love. Fake stans claim to be stan just to turn their favourite charachter into a weapon against others they don't like. Just as you did.
Saying that Nessian isn't healthy shows how you didn't understand their dynamic and both the characters. Worse is that you manipulate the book, the sentence and the facts in order to fit the "unhealty" thing.
Yall im gonna kms. NESTA IS 25. SHE IS 25 YEARS OLD AND IS GOING THROUGH SO MUCH SHIT. at this point I’m just pissed, like. Nestas literally my boo and everyone around her treats her like shit all the time. “Oh yeah, she’s displaying suicidal tendencies and definitely isn’t doing ok. But can she do this for us?” I hate you. I hate you so much. Leave my girl alone. NOT TO MENION CASSIAN?? Swear to god that man can catch these hands on any day of the week.
#pro cassian#pro nessian#acosf#let my girl be happy and in love for once#nesta x cassian#nessian#acotar#nessian are happy and in love and are healing with one another let them be#let my baby girl nesta be happy for once#they love one another so respectfully and intensely#they are living their happily ever after#they are growing together#Cassian isn't an abuser#This narrative is toxic#actually disgusted that some people haven't reading comprehension#actually disgusted by your superficiality#actually disgusted by the way you speak about serious problems#they are literally soulmates#they are literally the same#they are literally married#they are literally so cute#books#calling out fake abusers not realizing being one#bullying#educate yourselves#sharing hate will ruin your soul#poor cassian 🥲#poor nesta#at the very end she is in a better place#at the very end they are both happy and in love
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~ Shadows Bathed In Moonlight ~
Azriel x Youngest Archeron Sister!Reader x OC
Little Ezekiel was not like his cousins.
Nyx, older only by two years, was cheerful and outgoing, curious like his mother and with an unbridled fearlessness just like his father.
Baby Thena, the youngest of the three, who had only just began to walk- toddle, already had the will of both her mother and father.
Cassian’s mischievous grin with Nesta’s piercing gaze.
Ezekiel, however, was just like Azriel.
He was very shy, in fact, he preferred to hide behind his mother’s legs and cling onto the shimmering skirts that pooled over them than chase after his cousins.
Rest his curly mop of raven hair against his father’s neck who was more than happy to scoop him up and carry him around, protective over the innocent child who had yet to be tainted by Prythian’s cruelties.
It was no secret Azriel preferred it that way, Rhysand and Cassian often teasing his parental axiety and overbearing behaviour, reminding him his son was an Illyrian after all.
Just as Illyrian as he had once been- delicate wings folded against his little back but with unblemished hands and love in his heart.
Azriel would keep it that way.
His Mate knew it was because of the innate fear of the Mother snatching his happiness away- as though he had never deserved it.
Ezekiel was a little miracle.
Not only were Fae children rare, the dangerous birth had put his mother in a coma, and him confined to the Healer’s for the first month of his wavering life.
It was the worst time of Azriel’s centuries long existence.
If he had been protective before, he was a hundred times worse now
When the other children played, Ezekiel was happy to curl up in another adult’s lap, to which many of them had no qualms, as Ezekiel was just the “cutest” according to Mor- a tiny version of his father that the Inner Circle could squeeze and smother with kisses.
Feyre often scolded Nyx for dragging the poor boy around, but Ezekiel held no grudges, a small blush on his face as his cousin tugged him along ranting on about whatever a child of his age had to rant about.
But now it was time for him to leave the nest.
The one his parents has so throughly wound.
“Ezekiel,” his mother bent down to his eye level, twinkling hazel eyes wide and scared. “Mama will be back soon okay?”
The little boy’s lip wobbled and tiny fists came to rub at his eyes which quickly filled with tears. His silent sobs broke her heart, Madja had always said he was an easy baby, like his father.
And even now- when he cried, he tried to hide it.
It worried her- that he would never throw a tantrum or openly seek comfort- but hide it as though he was ashamed to feel.
He choked back little cries as his mother had to force away her own.
She hated to think her little boy felt the need to internalise his feelings- especially from her.
Azriel had assured her it was okay- that he had been that way too, even when his own mother had shown him nothing but love.
“You’ll have lots of fun my Little Shadow,” she pressed a deep kiss to his wet cheek, gently brushing away his tears, trying not only to convince him but herself. “Nyx will be with you-“
“Yepppp! Come on ‘Zekiellllll!” His cousin’s voice sang in anticipation, not understanding why the boy was so reluctant to play with toys and read funny picture books all day.
Ezekiel continued to cry and so his mother picked him up, cradling him against her chest as he sobbed without restraint.
Unusual for such a well-behaved child such as he.
“D-Don’t leave me mama!” He wept. “I-I pwomise I’ll be good p-pwease don’t give me away!”
Her heart broke as he trembled and her free hand came to stroke at his curls, the way she had done to comfort her own husband many a time.
“I would never give you away my darling, and you have not been bad,” she smoothed his raven locks, “you are a big boy now, just like Nyx. You are old enough go and play with all other children-“
“I not a big boy I-I still a baby!” He cried and that was when his father appeared, face just as torn as his mother’s.
The boy did not giggle as he usually did when his father’s shadows came to tickle against his cheek, his cries coming out in small hiccups as she looked to Azriel in pure misery.
He wordlessly plucked the child from her arms, his own chest tightening at the sound of his only child’s pained cries- crying under the belief he was being abandoned.
Azriel had vowed his child would never feel the way he had, unloved and nothing but a burden the Mother was so cruel to burden the equally dismal world with.
His Mate had changed that outlook.
And now his greatest treasure- a part of them both, homage to their fiery passion and proof the Shadowsinger was indeed capable of love.
Ezekiel continued to cry as Azriel’s shadows were equally as unsettled, trying their best to cheer up the little boy who quivered so violently, he might have fallen from his father’s arms had the older male’s grip been so secure.
He would rather suffer burns across his entire flesh- take Truthteller to his heart than have his son feel unwanted.
“You know that your mother and I love you- more than anything. More than the sky above.”
Ezekiel sniffed, his little head nodding pathetically as best it could smushed into Azriel’s chest.
“You are our little star Ezekiel. You are the most precious thing to us- in all of Prythian. We would never let anything or anyone harm you, you never have to be afraid of the world as long as I am here.”
Feyre stood in the distance- letting her brother-in-law share the moment with his son, knowing just how heartbroken Rhys was at the same situation.
The difference was, Nyx hardly gave him a second glance- sprinting into the unfamiliar building with a new sense of reverence and promise of adventure.
“D-Daddy stay?” The boy became hopeful as Azriel shook his head, running a hand lovingly through his son’s inherited locks- a sense of pride and indescribable love overwhelming him at the sight.
Before he could come up with some semblance of comfort, Feyre saved the day. Pressing a wet kiss to her nephew’s cheek with an infectious smile on her warm face.
It wasn’t that she thought her own sister incapable, she just knew the poor woman was just as worried as Azriel.
Their forced smiles and glossy eyes hardly convincible even to a child.
“Hmmm, a little shadow told me that Uncle Cass has a surprise back home waiting for his best Spy…”
The boy paused, his little face red and besmirched with tears but an undeniable curiosity to his eye.
“Spies don’t cry Zekie!” Nyx chimed in as his mother sent him a gentle look of reprimand. “Come onnnnn, the faster we get home, the faster we get the suprise!”
“You like painting, don’t you Ezekiel?” Feyre continued, distracting the boy enough for him to perk up in curiosity, loosening his little balled fisted grip on his father’s leathers. “Would you like me to show you the art room?”
Azriel- albeit reluctantly, lowered his son to the ground, gently encouraging him towards Feyre who happily received his little hand in hers.
The Shadowsinger took his Mate into his arms as replacement, the loss of his son weighing heavy even on his own marred heart.
The boy had never once been out of their sight for so long.
And as Feyre guided him into the Nursery, her sister mouthing a watery ‘thank you’ as a tear cascaded down her cheek, Azriel couldn’t help but let one of his own slip as Ezekiel passed through the doors and out of his sight.
Hesitant in his little steps, but with his cousin there to help him along.
Just as Rhysand had done for his father.
#fanfic#acotar#acotar fic#acotar x oc#acotar x reader#azriel x archeron sister#azriel x original character#azriel x oc#azriel fanfic#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar#azriel x reader#azriel#dad!azriel
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Me seeing people talk shit about Nesta because they don’t have the brain cells to understand her character
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I really hate the whole “Oh Elain doesn’t notice that kind of thing” “she’s not cruel just unobservant” excuse as to why she never helped out
Because… we know she’s not. She was shown to be the most outgoing and socially talented of the sisters. She is clever and intelligent. Obviously she noticed they were impoverished, but you cannot sit here and tell me that the thought never occurred to her in 8 years that there was anything she could do to help. She’s not a fucking idiot. At least SJM let Nesta be aware and just tried to make her mean.
That idea plays into the infantilization of Elain too much and the whole “oh she’s just too sweet and gentle” “look at poor baby Elain” for me to see any reason within it
She was still the same age as Feyre and Nesta and should be held to the same standards y’all hold them to. It sounds like a copout to excuse Elain’s inaction while demonizing Nesta’s
This isn’t anti-Elain at all, but rather me annoyed at how it reduced her character when we’re already given so little
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NESTA FUCKING ARCHERON
I love how Tumblr didn't want me to upload the TikTok that just gutted me at 3 am but I'm not normal about Nesta so did I screenshot all of it? Yes, yes I did.
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Found this comment on Reddit. Couldn’t explain it better than this.
“It’s clear from Mist and Fury that the original ships were: Feysand, Nessian, Elucien, and Mor/Azriel. Like it’s so obvious the way she wrote Mor and Azriel; Mor even seems vaguely interested/torn about Az. Looking at interviews, SJM even talks about Elucien as a couple (eg where would they like to travel together, etc).
Flash forward to ACOWAR. For whatever reason (lack of chemistry with Az, wanting more diversity) SJM has Mor say that she prefers women. This time the Az-pining-for-Mor is more desperate/feels like a zero chance of being requited. SJM also introduces Az as a potential love interest for Elain because she loves throwing a wrench. Just because Elucien are mates doesn’t mean they’ll have it easy; SJM’s whole thing is angst. She had to throw in a love triangle to make it uncertain. This is the first couple where mate status is confirmed upon meeting.
But there’s a problem now. If Az and Mor are no longer endgame, who will they end up with? is it not suspicious that the two new characters introduced in SF (Gwyn and Emerie) just HAPPEN to be potentially be good partners for Az and Mor? Like it’s not a coincidence that Emerie looks at Mor and blushes, remarking how pretty she is. It’s not a coincidence that Az and Gwyn have so many interactions in the text. It’s not a coincidence that a “random side character” shows up in a bonus chapter.
When SJM created Gwyn and Emerie, it wasn’t just to give Nesta friends. These characters clearly didn’t exist when she wrote MAF. SJM wanted new characters that would solve her retcon of ending Az/Mor. She wanted to solve the Mor/Az retcon so bad that she created a NEW RETCON of Az going to Sangravah. Like why bother to add that detail if it’s not important.
Also: poor Lucien. His endgame heroine was supposed to be Nesta until SJM realized they would be terrible together and that Nessian had better chemistry. So she gives Elucien the mating bond. Like is she really going to fuck Lucien over TWICE? She loves him as a character and has put him through the wringer. Yes, I agree that SJM can change her mind and maybe is open to mate rejection, but Lucien has already switched love interests from Nesta to Elain! Who else is he going to switch to, considering that Jurian and Vassa are “at each other’s throats?”
Finally, please think about the number of books left. Ignoring novellas (which are probably gonna be fluffy ones like ACOFAS where nothing happens), there are two main books left. Two couples.
Option A:
• Gwynriel (Valkyrie growth, Illyrian rebellion, exploring Ramiel, Gwyn’s autumn heritage and maybe lightsinger?? powers)
• Elucien (Helion secret baby, defeating Koschei, freeing Vassa, fixing spring court)
Option B
• Elriel (mate rejection storyline, potentially some stuff above)
• ?????
Literally WHO is the second book in this equation? Lucien and Vassa?? We barely know Vassa and there’s barely any connection to Night Court. And Lucien’s book is going to be depressing as fuck dealing with mate rejection; does anyone want to read two heavy books of rejection? Jurian and Vassa: again, we barely know them! At least with Tower of Dawn, Chaol had been a main character for a long time with POV. SJM will not do a full-length Emerie/Mor book as much as I would love for one. She’s very cognizant of criticism re: Mor bi rep in the past; she doesn’t want to open a can of worms and be accused of writing bad sapphic rep. If anything, I can see a fluffy Emerie/Mor novella with little angst (or them getting together in the background of other books).
So from a meta structural level, I don’t understand who the second couple will be if Elriel is endgame. Lucien/Vassa is the most plausible answer, but 1) we barely know Vassa, 2) she’s human and Lucien is immortal. So are we going to toss her into the Cauldron to make her immortal? Serious question, and 3) I don’t want TWO books about mate rejection, it’s depressing as hell. I can see one but not two.
But with Gwynriel and Elucien, you have enormous fan and audience interest in ALL FOUR CHARACTERS. They’re directly tied to Night Court and SJM so far has no intention of staying away from the core group.”
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Get freaky, you say? Well in that case... (Clears throat) Nesta topping mouthy bottom Cassian
happy kinktober freaks besties. sorry I’ve been a bit mia, I moved last week and signed a new job offer so I’ve just been trying to get my life together!!! hope you enjoy this hehe my inbox will be open all month long 😏😏
Cassian had only been tied up for a few minutes and he was already losing his mind.
“Nesta, come on,” he whined, already pulling a little bit at Nesta’s very expertly tied restraints. There was just enough give that his circulation wasn’t cut off, and he couldn’t help . “I said I was sor— oh, fuck.”
Most of the time Cassian could get away with a lot of shit — sue him, he was a brat through and through — but sometimes, he’d manage to push Nesta’s buttons just enough to make her follow through on her threat of the day.
Despite all the complaining he was doing right now, those were Cassian’s favorite times. Today’s threat had been that if he wouldn’t keep his hands to himself, Nesta would tie him to the headboard and wring him dry, and holy shit was he glad she took that kind of thing seriously. He just hadn’t been able to stop touching her today, and as much as she enjoyed it, he knew she enjoyed turning him into a begging mess so much more, so the second they’d gotten home, she’d told him to get naked and get on the bed.
Part of Cassian wished he’d actually been good today, but as he watched Nesta stroke his cock, a much larger part of him was thankful he hadn’t.
“Like you aren’t having the time of your life,” Nesta eventually said, continuing her excruciatingly slow handjob. Even though he knew it wouldn’t really help, he couldn’t stop himself from bucking up into her fist again once she reached the head of his almost painfully hard cock. “If you’d just listened to me in the first place, maybe I would’ve let you come already.”
“I’m listening now,” he said back. He wished he could reach out and fit his hand into the curve of her waist or brush his thumb against one of her hardened nipples, but those ropes wouldn’t free him anytime soon. “I’m being really good right now.”
“Because I tied you to the headboard,” she told him slowly, like he was an idiot. God, she was hitting all of his buttons today. “Do you really think that counts as good behavior?”
Cassian knew what the right answer was, but even when he was wholly at Nesta’s mercy he couldn’t stop himself from being a little shit. “Maybe?”
“Maybe,” Nesta repeated with a scoff. She abruptly let go of his cock and shifted from where she was sitting next to him on the bed to straddling him instead. “Well, maybe I should show you what good behavior actually looks like.”
“You should,” he replied quickly, nodding so hard it was a miracle he didn’t give himself whiplash. He had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop from coming at the barest brush of her cunt against his cock, and by the smirk on her face, she absolutely knew it. “I’m a fast learner.”
“Just fast, I think,” she responded. She rocked against him again, laughing when he dug his nails into his palms as hard as he could to distract himself. “Someone’s quick off the mark, hmm?”
“Can’t help it,” he told her through gritted teeth. She hadn’t explicitly told him he couldn’t come, but he knew from prior experience that there would be hell to pay if he did. And not the fun kind. “You know what you do to me.”
“Mhmm.” Nesta shifted against him again, and Cassian desperately started thinking about soccer stats. He wanted to touch her so badly it was like a physical ache, and he only had himself to blame. “Poor baby. Would my cunt make you feel better?”
“Yes, fuck, please,” Cassian panted. He normally wasn’t above begging, but he wanted to be inside her so badly he would say whatever she wanted to hear. “Nesta, please, I need you, I promise I’ll do whatever you say, I’ll be so fucking good, please, please, please—”
Cassian lost the ability to form words as Nesta finally grabbed his cock and sank down on it, her cunt hot and tight and perfect as she took every inch of him. It was a miracle he didn’t come on the spot, and he forced himself to look at her face instead of where they were joined so he didn’t tempt fate any further.
“Look at that,” Nesta cooed, reaching down to pinch Cassian’s nipple. He jerked at the touch with a hiss, but it quickly turned into a groan as the motion bounced Nesta just a little on his cock. “Someone finally learned to shut up.”
As Nesta started to move, the only noise Cassian was capable of making were a combination of gasps, whimpers, and pleas. What he was pleading for, he wasn’t totally sure, but that was completely fine with him. Nesta was the only one allowed to decide what he deserved to receive, and God was he so on board with whatever that ended up being.
“If you even think about coming before I do,” Nesta said casually, taking a break from bouncing on his cock to grind down instead, “I’ll make you regret it.”
Cassian wasn’t sure if he could hold on that long, but he was in for a hell of a night either way. “Yes, Nesta.”
“Such a good boy,” she cooed, just derisive enough that he had to fight to keep himself from floating off into lala land. “Now hold on tight. I’m not stopping until I come or you start crying.”
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