#pony has a secret weapon here

[broareweabouttoviberightnow]

pony n curly absolutely fascinating to me bc what if they fight huh? see pony was raised in a we argue FIRST n THEN whoever is losing is giving up n bodying their sibling to the ground type house. so if u piss off pony u are getting verbally torn to SHREDDDDSS. curly. not so much. hashtag love Tim. but when the two of them fight it is a handful of minced words n then one of them is FLYING across the room. so when curly n pony get into it pony taps into all the bitchiness in his heart meanwhile curly is genuinely just vibrating with the urge to tackle him.

[ionicslime]

Excuse me waiter my full name is,

Ionic "im already in cool mode" "tutorial character" "i will get a color role if you beat the path of pain in hollow knight" " @king-of-fuffies do radiant gruz mother" "ADMIN WATCH DAWGS HES TRY TO CHANGE MY COLOR WITHOUT MY CONSENT" "THERE WAS NO BASEMENT! IT WAS THE SECOND FLOOR OF MY HOUSE!" "i don't know what a bong is. WHAT THE FUCK IS A BONG" "there should be a suggestion box on this server. THEY CALL IT THE LITTERBOX" "im going to take an emergency shit" "YOU FORGOT TO PICK UP THE LEGO ON THE FLOOR" "i was the best man AND the pope" "does this look like the face of mercy" "you own him therefore you are responsible for them" "the" "you are the father" "if im a moth do i deal 2 masks of damage" "my body is ready" "if it needs a color role you'll never take me alive" "it was funny but also" "extremely" "extremely" "extremely" "extremely" "cursed" "carleah, not pillar john" "he soaks up more damage that way" "everyone has a horror game dopelganger" "Ruck" "Fuffy get your man’s, He exploded" "I need to find Carleah and steal their liver to take their ability to open the thousand-one year door" "Only then Keane McZupp will explode turning into a bagel at 3 am after ordering the among us happy meal" "ethereal toasters are the only thing that can control toast" "all toasters have secret potato slots" "he is several parallel universes behind" "the internet is a giant mcdonalds" "I’m a ocean" "i cant even throw you, much less pick you up" "he didn't know FedEx had a stand" "funny words magic man" "nothing to see here" "Za Waldo!" "Remember besties, don’t blow stuff in peoples faces unless it’s air kisses, or darts!" "fuffy left me in the car for 4 hours" "There are no mistakey wakeys" "Fuffy I’m like 300% sure you are a pony" "He was pouring out lemonade into the abyss" "**Fuffy was ejected. One Sussy Boy remains**" "The abyss was thirsty" "A funny" "I am not safe for clothes driers" "Can your wall eat a lawn mower" "squirrels do not die at terminal velocity. also theres lizards that fire blood from their eyes as a defense mechanicism" “I bowl like my sexuality: Not straight” "short" "You have 5 minutes to live" "IM A FUCKING CAR KEANE" "\*I mean edgy I mean edgy I mean edgy I mean Edgy" "What is this mario party" "no" "brain issue" "i even crashed your computer" “Seduce the Skeleton!” “Kentucky Fried [REDACTED]” "im scared of my own pasta power sometimes" "He becomes noise pizza tower" "Anything is possible, with the power of Crazy Dave’s Twinkysdinkys" "he eats the golf ball and dies" “Everything is a weapon if you hit someone hard enough” "Happy tale of under unde of tale tdat" "fuffy brain melt. he die" "why are you in my chem textbook" "where is the dinnerbone cat." "Everything is a table." "Was schmoving too hard and bust my ass." "That was just my normal attack. Deploying Unexplainable Gifs" "I am immune to gachas. And they’re immune to me." "Did you know you don’t have organs. The constitution I wrote myself says so." "Go to Burger King" "My attack was so powerful discord crashed" "Fuffy open the door I have 3 sad poems and one sparkler" "If you rearrange final you get fianl" "stop watching cringe and beat the shit out of every boss." “Alright, you’re getting stepped on.” "i am the bio-weapon in youe walls" "*Hello my name is now temporarily humphrey*" "Also I beat up a toaster today," "we got a job to do" Slime

[arrowfrozen]

nathan. • bodyclaim. • headcanons. • isms. • threads.

BASIC INFO

full name — Nathan Gray age — thirty-nine (april 22nd) gender — cis male, (he/ him/ his pronouns) orientation — homosexual occupation — prosecutor, district attorney deity connection — boreas  pony name — ghost weapon — longbow + studded leather armor clothing style — chic (suits), but he can go casual, though he's often found in pieces of his armor bc it's not too heavy and he might as well..

PHYSICAL INFO

face claim — Shawn Ashmore hair — blonde / eyes — blue height — five foot & eleven inches build — lean, he's all muscle and skin and bone scars — a long one down his left arm from the first attack on him when he was younger and one down his back - about halfway from the shoulder down. both are fading but because he's so pale.. they show quite a bit tattoos — camp jupiter brand/tattoo on his arm for 10y of service piercings — a few rings in the helix of his ears, tho he often has them covered by the hood special characteristics — very logical/analytic, observing and sometimes pessimistic, ambitious & workaholic to the point of no return sexual preference— bottom switch

PERSONALITY

alignment — lawful neutral positive traits — eloquent, affectionate, ambitious, gentle soul negative traits — pessimistic-ish, workaholic, feisty, uptight hobbies — training, giving online courses on law, taking on a few cases here and there (work is his hobby yes lmao)

MEDICAL INFO

mental — anxiety (buried) physical — struggles to put on weight, but healthy phobias — atychiphobie eyesight — 20/20 although avrae tends to disagree dominant hand — ambidextrous drug use — maybe alcohol use — yeeep diet — tends to go for calories bc he struggles to hold his weight, but he was raised not to be very picky, so he's chill

BACKGROUND

birthplace — new haven, CT parents — Liara Gray (biological mother) & David Gray (step-father) & Boreas (biological father) siblings — n/a pets — tba education — law school graduate notable skills — disciplined, ambitious, enduring. fast reader, analyzes situations quickly

BIO

The Grays have always been lawyers. Nathan’s parents met through their parents’ law firms and everybody before them did, too. His sire would always say that was their secret to success. The Grays worked only for themselves, taking up cases that were profitable for them, those who would provide the most publicity with high chances of success. Nathan grew up in his parents’ law firm, spending most of his time after daycare, after school, after highschool there - every free minute of his days were spent in an office chair, running around the lobby, annoying the receptionists until one of his parents would come and scold him, tell him to sit back down and learn, because one day he'd be sitting in one of those office chairs not to play, but to work.

Sometimes he did. But most times he decided that everything else was more fun than listening to adults ramble about laws and consequences and contracts. In highschool, they let him work for the firm - it was simple jobs like sorting files, proof-reading and the like, but every single Gray lawyer went through the same process when growing up, so Nathan would, too. While other teenagers his age were out playing football or making music, Nathan was sitting inside his father’s office - ear pods in his ears with soft music playing most of the day and doing paperwork for the firm. He realized very early on that he was different. In more ways than one. One would be his well-kept secret, the other was diagnosed when he was eight years old. ADHD. His issues - as his parents had been addressing Nathan's ticks.. finally explained, but at what cost?

It was never the same after, but his parents tried their very best to raise him like he wasn’t the black sheep in the family. In a family so so dependent on the public opinion of their business, a child - and he was the only child of Liara and David, with a mental illness, as harmless as it might seem ... was not a good thing. At least they let him keep the music going when he worked, knowing that otherwise he’d never get any work done. Despite all that, despite the difficulties he was put through - despite the disappointment he could see in his parents’ eyes whenever they looked at him, he graduated at the top of his class and went to New Haven’s University to study Law and only a year later as expected. 

Of course he did. 

Nathan knew nothing else - had been molded into a lawyer before he developed the ability to decide for himself what he wanted to do with his life and besides, he’d brought enough shame over his family, he couldn't disappoint them yet again. ADHD was punishment enough in itself - if you asked him. the constant thrum of voices whispering at him, day and night. Nobody who wasn’t affected by it would understand. But he had given up trying to explain. So he found his own system, his own way to deal with the disadvantage and make the best of it. He wouldn’t be where he was if he hadn’t been born feisty and stubborn - a trait inherited by most of the Grays.

But, during his time on Campus - his family loosened the grip they had on him, sure he’d follow suit like he had been taught to. Classes, study, sleep. Rinse and repeat. Nathan though, found himself drawn to the outside more and more, found himself exploring a world he’d never really seen before. He drank, he woke up hungover. He dated, he fell in love, he got his heart broken and regretted ever giving up the celibate life his parents wished on him. He was alive. He was not just one of the voices - he was flesh and blood.

Love hit him harder than he expected, especially because it came in the form of a very handsome fellow student who wasn’t just someone equally misplaced in their respective family, but felt the same instant draw towards him. Like a moth to light. Love at first sight. And boy, did it hit them hard. Both their families would never agree, so they kept their love a secret all the way through law school. Nathan finished a year late and yet before Patrick and managed to get into the DA's office. Officially he was going for experience, but deep down he knew he'd never work in his parents' firm - his sense of righteousness would never allow him to. He wasn't selfish, he wasn't ready to sell his soul for money and publicity. He wanted to help make the world a better place.

When Patrick finished a year later, he joined Nathan and they worked together for about a year until - at holiday festivities at work, their parents caught wind of their relationship. Co-workers had commented on how adorable they were with their matching scarves and beanies in the winter and had freely elaborated when approached for more information. When presented with options on how to proceed - from both their parents, they knew they had only one option. Flee. They packed their bags and fled to the other side of the continent. San Francisco was their target location, but two demigods traveling alone were too juicy a sight to be let go. They were attacked during their stay at some motel a few miles away, saved by a son of Mars (?) and found out about each other's abilities.

Taken back to Camp Jupiter for safety, they both decided to stay and help fight the fight. Or prepare for it anyway. Sure, they had their ups and downs, but they held their own in Camp. They talked for a long time as their ten years mark neared and decided to try for a normal life again. Back to the east coast, using the connections they still somewhat had (Nathan never quite stopped getting involved in cases.) and for about a year it all went well. But then they were attacked again. And again, in their own four walls (the office).

Maybe they shouldn't have been ignoring the call.....

During their stay at Camp Jupiter, they found out about Camp Halfblood and that theoretically that's where they were home. Properly. So, both once again packed their bags and set out for Long Island to find refuge in Camp Halfblood.

Feb 13th update.

[lavelled]

Writing this now, I realize that I’m done pontificating on rape, trapped, kidnapping, life theft, middle-age nothingness, youth elongated, gun violence, school shootings, concert shootings, twenty-something suicide, teen suicide, tween suicide, suburban annihilation, family murder-suicide, animal cruelty, leashing, good, god, dog, bad, bomb, hate groups, contracts, silent pacts, petitions, partitions, Windsor code, celebrity code, my code, childhood bullying, community, milky, double speak, philosophy, upchuck, hierarchy, pedophilia, maintaining rules, minimalist places, written, ridden, views, clicks, clinks because — and hear me out — it’s awful.

It's not altogether fair to be here, still, in familiar suburbia at 52 with nothing whilst writing of dire social ills thanks to my teenhood. I don’t want this to be my greatest accomplishment. To be withdrawn from society and detached from the place where I want to be, doing what I was meant to do alongside the people I’ve liked my whole life, but instead writing a bookish newsletter about sick horrendous crimes, and sometimes blaming myself for them.

These 39 blogs or so aren’t bemused stories. I hope Tom is able to make young people feel comfortable on the internet, without the monster on training wheels. People need to live their lives in some routine that doesn’t involve me or my situation.

There is Fresh Air. On NPR. There are bookstores, libraries, iTunes for a brew of restorative escapism. Find meaningful work in volunteering at animal shelters, the Boys & Girls Club, nursing homes, hospitals, help people with disabilities, Rosetta Stone a real language, pick up a new sport, take a computer science class, learn steamship Stem and code, open an online account somewhere. I’m 52 and done being told what to do or how to feel on a grand scale, with nothing.

Hey, Dad Cruise, instead of yelling at me through fake Camila Cabello press you could, oh I don’t know, get me out of an inbox.

Hack Prince Harry is weaponizing his news headlines in noisy agitation to expose his family pedophilia that is more kindergarten wooden blocks than rental vids. What’s your Blockbuster legal battle court case?

I thought you’d be chewing holes in your containment. I thought you’d be crinkled up in the intensive care unit by now. Such an eyewash tease. I expressed that if either you or your staff, and I can’t think of a more dispiriting pet-a-pony employment, tried to advertise Markle as this soft domesticity, idealized motherhood, feminist, some kind of role model or loving newlywed, I’d post accomplice screengrabs. Along comes a hoax Vanity Fair piece on Big Business in California to coincide raging wildfires about royally separated twatheads with no artistic products to sell; just producing heirs, thick layers of unmonitored cyber filth, underage kidnapping and wide-mouth contracts. Do magazine editors keep a barf bag nearby when they type up bullying claims from you and your nonentity wife who still has zero internet allowance?

How arousing it must’ve been for you. To chat with someone closed-off from the looming world and underneath a microscope; someone you knew was the only human not lover boyfriend spousal whispered to in your secret agreement code. During our sporty conversations, I didn’t know you were evil in its infancy. You kept telling me that Meghan was a con, a lie, and a stand-in for me and I’d retweet LIE. You’d fave-reply “too important” and “well-preserved” knowing I was blaming the middle-aged actor and not the pedophile King for my stalled ambition and childlessness. You kept telling me to flip it. Flip what? Your father is fossilized remains, ditchwater, and yellow teeth. I’d have to date a five year old.

Your Henri Matisse graffitiing is leaked contractual vandalism. Yeah, I recognized my life on a public website. My family, my real ethnicity, my sport, education, French battlefield feminist. For a while there, briefly, I had a life — however ribboned. You and your family took that all away with a coil of rope. I hope the book allows for a belated though punctual ending. With Tom at the helm, mopping the floor, so to speak.

In between cups of tea and pissy anger-walks, Henry Mountbatten-Windsor is nonstop underage pursuit because, as I’ve mentioned, no press secretary, no caretaker, no housemaid, no uncle, no cousin, no relative, no relative Thomas Kingston, where is Thomas Kingston husband to Lady Gabriella, no sister-in-law, no in-laws whatsoever, no step-mum, no polo buddy, no military veteran, no technical colleague, no palace aides, nobody on this earth wants to deal with the rotted, corroded, medically ill Prince with paperwork in decade 4. Humanist Harry gets the greatest pleasure from thimbles, scissors, and a technological setup in an old tower with a museum gift shop far away from California, threatening me, Tom Cruise, and children on iPads. Any new shiny award for the Duke and Duchess of Suckit?

The Spanish-born actor and Days of Our Lives soap opera star, Francisco San Martin, 39, just killed himself by hanging in LA. Maybe we could re-label soap operas without cleanliness or liquid laundry detergent or shower thoughts, which is one of Harry’s tweet accounts. They are now called Milady Dramas. You’re forbidden from hurting yourselves.

I read a few presidential executive actions, systemic prejudice for marginalized groups of people including no funding or recognition for gender transition medical procedures and now there are only two biological sexes. Then I read something about trying to end birthright citizenship. Oh good. Blatantly unconstitutional orders. Who could have predicted that. Hegseth needed a VP pass for the top military job. I’ll be expressing my leftist politics at some point, though important people don’t always respond to it. I wish they would.

I’m reading and watching the hostage exchange in a ceasefire deal. I don’t remember feeling this thankful in quite a long time.

K

young stenographer; pen, notebook, machete red belt:

stop sexualizing your Angelic niece:

inhospitable, glorifying domestic violence on my mother’s birthday; it's Tom courtesy of Prince Harry: 

Harry’s supposed first words; why does he sign it as if he hasn’t been online since 2006 which he has — Celica and I conversed Feb 2014.

Article on his lies . . . https://www.eonline.com/news/542110/prince-harry-sends-his-first-tweet-at-invictus-games-launch-jokes-that-he-can-t-type-properly

being British royalty means pretending your family has multiple diseases while also advertising your nonwife and her cooking project:

playboying with the enemy — google Cibele Dorsa, she jumped from the seventh floor in Brazil years ago, stop hurting yourselves; with charity hashtag, see also Sentebale, Invictus Games, Archetypes: 

stereotyped The Archer. My acting dreams delayed by forty years, give or take:

a smiling, inconsolable child. Catch-­all X dorm room décor. 9.401 is debarment rule, like blacklisting:

a mateless spiderweb of go fuck yourself: 

hurting me to hurt Tom:

[croissantlover24]

"What do you mean, Moon is still alive?" she snarled. Her head swiveled around. Her hair, blonde as butterscotch, was tied into a pony tail. It bobbed from the motion. Her voice was a snarl, her demeanor a wolf ready to devour the prey in front of her. Her viridescent eyes dug daggers into her victim. "I thought we got rid of him."

Hm

"He's living in an abandoned mental hospital in the woods," Sun replied. "He has a new assistant, according to the rumors. I saw them last week at the shop."

That explains the white box

"What did they buy?" she ground out through gritted teeth. Her cerulean hat held her hair tie in place as her eyes flickered from the files on her desk to the animatronic in front of her. Down. Up. Down. Up. The tag on her uniform read, "Afton Authorites: Officer Vanessa." Her boots clicked against the wooden floor.

Authorities is spelled wrong :( /info /I am trying to be helpful when I correct spelling errors on your works please know that, I don't mean any harm

Also!!! VANESSAAAAAAAAAA

Sun leaned forward as if sharing a secret, his golden rays spinning one revolution. "They bought," he drawled, "an adjustable leather strap for belts and goggles, a blue cardboard gift box, and a yellow ribbon."

If they know he's in the woods why haven't they just raided it or something?????

"That doesn't help at all," Vanessa hissed. She slammed her fists onto the counter. "What were you expecting, Officer Vanessa?" Sun always said her name with a slight venom in his tone, like he was greeting someone he didn't care for at a party. Like he was a viper waiting for the perfect moment to strike. "Something incriminating? Moon's not the brightest, but he's no idiot. Do you genuinely think he's going to send his assistant to buy weapons?"

LMAO????

"No," she relented, her eyes glistening with that glow of an idea Sun had come to recognize—had come to dread, "because he already has weapons."

Oh god what the fuck is Vanessa doing to Sun

Sun scoffed. He crossed his arms against his crimson sweater. "I doubt he does," Sun argued. A glare painted his features. "He certainly had the weapons back when he—"

He certainly still has one at least

"That was decades ago, Vanessa!" the sunny animatronic exclaimed sourly. "He most likely discarded of them." "Or kept them," she countered, "for his plan to go on another murdering spree in the future."

Why-- what?????? He's not an idiot why would he do that????

She stood and waved the files in front of Sun's face. "Remember what we're here for," she growled, her free hand on her hips. "We want to jail that criminal. We need to find something incriminating so that he imprisons himself. Don't let your personal ties get in the way.

Bestie I think he's effectively already imprisoned. He doesn't need to go to Jail Jail to be isolated from everyone

"Besides," she continued, "you don't want him to hurt more people, do you? Remember that child he—?"

:(

"Alright, alright!" Sun relented, his optics squeezed shut as he theatrically threw himself backwards. He always acted as if he were on a stage. He teetered on one foot as he stained his bright faceplate with a dark grimace. "Don't remind me."

He's so silly (in regards to the theatrics)

Vanessa walked around her mahogany desk. Her hands wiped dust from the more neglected crannies. Her gaze pierced through him with a sharpness only a knife could match. "Don't need reminding."

VANESSA. STOP THAT.

Her voice was smooth, careful. Sun, however, could hear the silent threat beneath its depths. He yelled at himself: "Stop messing up." "Stop being emotionally tied to Moon." "You're the one who got your brother barred from public in the first place." "You started this." "Finish it." "Stop bringing yourself closer to de—retirement."

D:

He took a deep breath and cleared out his processors. He needed an empty mind, a clear slate, if he wanted to maintain his… civil demeanor. "Of course, Officer Vanessa." His eyes flickered. "Thank you for giving me another chance instead of voiding our agreement. Your generosity knows no bounds." Vanessa knew he was forcing himself to say this. She could see it in the way his hands squeezed the fabric of his pants, in the way his smile was just slightly too wide.

VANESSA STOP.

She couldn't find it in herself to care. He knew that she was the one in power, not him. She had control over him. She decided whether he would live or die. And she would abuse that privilege for as long as she could.

VANESSA WHEN I CATCH YOU.

She pulled off her hat and unbuttoned her blouse, revealing a purple sweater underneath. "I think it is about time I pay Moon's new assistant a visit," she remarked with a cool grin. "For old time's sake." Two weeks left.

two weeks left

"Hi," Moon echoed in your ear as you were washing dishes. You jumped. "Hello, sir," you ground out through gritted teeth. "How may I help you?" "Oh, I don't need anything yet, little lamb," he chuckled. "I just wanted to make sure your… reflexes were working."

Moon....

He laughed maniacally like your torment was the funniest thing in the world. You couldn't take it anymore. "I'm curious," you began, almost breaking the glass cup you were washing with the force your hands pushed onto it, "how old are you?"

Old

"Oh," Moon answered. He drew out the "o" for at least an entire minute. A nostalgic smile was spread across his face. "I've been around for at least two centuries." You couldn't take it anymore. You swiveled around and was inches from his face in seconds. "How about you take your dementia pills instead of bothering me," you hissed, "old man?"

The was in "You swiveled around and was inches from his face in seconds" should be "were" I think?

Also iconic behaviour from Reader

Shock washed over Moon's face. Horror on yours soon followed. You trembled. "I-I'm so sorry," you stuttered. "I don't know what came over me! I'm so, so sorry. I-I was just so tired of—I-I—please don't fire me." You weren't one for begging, but in this moment, you were inches from crawling on your hands and knees and praying for forgiveness.

D:

Moon's expression twitched. You couldn't tell if it was to a frown or to a smile. Most likely the former. Your hands shivered in place. Tears bubbled in your eyes. Had you just ruined your chance? You couldn't go back to being homeless. You couldn't go back to life without food or water. You couldn't—! Moon laughed. Loudly.

Reader, about to have a panic attack: Oh god what have I done

Moon, glad they're comfortable enough around him to do that: LMAO

His laughter boomed throughout the room. He was wiping imaginary tears from his eyes and was practically on the floor. He found it funny. You let out a shaky sigh of relief. Thank the heavens above. "You're hilarious," he stammered out between cackles. "I could never fire you." His laughter grew greater in volume. You almost laughed along with him in relief. Almost.

LMAO

Oh my god wrecking ball just started playing on my playlist Hang on I'm going to explode about Hemic

One moment

"I'm so sorry," you stuttered. "Don't be!" Moon grinned. Wide. Uncanny. You were beginning to get used to it. You flinched as he swiped his claw beneath your eyes to remove the tears that were forming. "I should've known that that would be annoying to you," he bregrudgingly admitted. He still didn't apologize, but it was close enough.

Begrudgingly is spelled wrong, I'm so sorry if you don't like me correcting these, please tell me if you are so I ca stop

Anyway! Glad Moon's seen that Reader is having an awful time

Perhaps he wasn't so bad. The joy was wiped from his face in seconds. He became impassive once more. He dropped a list of things to buy into your hands. "Go get these," he said.

Oh No he is so bad

As you walked off, he wondered if you'd ever realize how badly he needed to know that you weren't going to quit. Probably not.

Hm

The idea that you were begging him to stay and not to let you leave baffled him, but in a good way. A way he liked. A way he could get used to.

AAAAAAA MOON

The streets were busy. With the holidays just around the corner, hundreds of people were in town doing their last-minute shopping. Snow pounded down on the ground below. It was hard to see through the blizzard. You eventually found your way, though, and entered one of the stores along the main road to buy the supplies your employer needed. That was when you met a new face. A voice you did not recognize recited your name. "Is that you?"

Hi Vanessa

You turned around slowly like a machine with un-oiled joints. "Yes," you replied with the speed of a sloth. "May I help you?" The woman in front of you wore khakis and a violet sweatshirt. Her hair was tied into a pony tail. It swayed back and forth as she spoke to you. She held herself with an air of authority, like her very presence demanded respect. Her back was straight and her posture tall. You felt out of place talking to her.

I could say something here about disliking cops and authority figures like her, but that might take a while

"You can," she responded with a nod. "I would like to talk to you." Your fingers twitched. Something about this didn't feel right.

It's cause she's a cop

But who were you to deny a polite stranger? "Sure," you relented, putting the list into your pocket. "What do you need to talk about?" "You're Moon's new assistant, yes?" she asked you. She tilted her head in anticipation of your response. Ah. So that was how she knew your name.

HISSING AT HER

You wondered how many other people knew who you were because of those rumors. The thought made you shiver. "That is correct," you confirmed, leaning against one of the shelves. She gave you a look. It was hard to describe. It felt like dismay, hatred, and concern all at once. You were hit with a wave of emotion from this lady that you could not decipher. "Be careful," she warned you. "He is not known for his benevolence." "Everyone keeps saying that!" you ranted. "I don't understand. What did he do? Why does everyone hate him?"

They don't know about the murders

Her eyes widened. Ah. You knew what she was looking at you with now. Pity. "You really don't know?" Her voice was low, conspirational. "I really don't," you replied, your voice instinctively going quieter to match hers. Her eyebrows furrowed. "He's a murderer."

They really don't know

(Conspiratorial is spelled wrong I'm so so sorry if you hate being corrected about these)

She paused as if to consider her next words. "My name is Officer Vanessa. Why don't you come with me to the station and we can discuss this further?" You shifted uncomfortably. You didn't want to go to a police station with Vanessa. But what other choice did you have?

UGHHHHHHH I HATE COPS SO BADDDDDDD

"He's waiting for me," you stuttered as an excuse. "He can wait longer," she said simply. She started walking, and you couldn't help but follow.

Oh Reader :(

Final Thoughts: I hate her (Vanessa) so bad

AAAAAA spelling mistakeeee

They can’t just break in there. Moon still owns the property. They need a search warrant and probable cause.

AAAAA ANOTHER SPELLING MISTAKE AAAAA

It was really late at night where I was when I wrote this 😞😞 (I’m probably not going to fix them though lol it’s so early right now)

Please don’t say how much you hate police in my inbox 🥲

[maximuswolf]

How Bethesda can get back on track and make The Elder Scrolls VI incredible

How Bethesda can get back on track and make The Elder Scrolls VI incredible It's been a rough... decade for Bethesda's reputation. After producing hit after hit in the 360-era and achieving industry-leader status with Skyrim in 2011, they've suffered from some colossal missteps.That said, even as someone who lost a ton of faith in them after Fallout 76 and Starfield, I have absolutely zero doubt that everything will be forgiven if The Elder Scrolls 6 turns out great. Not perfect. Not flawless. Just great.Disclaimer: I recognize that giving an industry titan advice like I'm some sort of expert sounds condescending but, given just how badly Bethesda has fumbled the ball with their past two releases, maybe taking a step back and listening to the most common advice from backseat game devs would be beneficial.With that out of the way, here are five steps Bethesda can take to make TESVI a hit with their fanbase, achieve another Skyrim moment, and get back on top:1. Old-School World Design: Exploration used to be Bethesda's greatest strength, and TESVI needs to feel like a return to the heights of Morrowind and Skyrim. Take no big risks here, and instead find little inspirations from games like Elden Ring (tons of secrets, terrifying encounters) and BOTW (meaningful weather, exciting traversal), while still maintaining the overall feel that players loved from the previous TES games. No procedural nonsense or cut corners, just make a great world by hand as if it was 2003 or 2011 again.2. Modern Combat: It's tough to make first-person melee combat feel good, so bring on experts from studios like Fatshark (Vermintide), Torn Banner (Chivalry) and Triternion (Mordhau) who have made significant strides in that area since Skyrim. Weapon types should feel meaningfully different, builds should be highly diverse, and enemy variety should be more extensive than ever before.3. Expert Writing: As far as quest writing goes: If From Software is humble enough to hire an expert like George R.R. Martin to lay the groundwork for Elden Ring, then Bethesda should do the same thing with a writer of a similar caliber. 2006 & 2008 Bethesda could get Patrick Stewart and Liam Neeson to play major characters in Oblivion and Fallout 3, respectfully, so what's stopping 2025 Bethesda from hiring a top-quality writer to guide their vision and plug holes in their storytelling? Hell, if they don't want to spend the money, just bring over some folks from fellow Microsoft studio Obsidian to act as editors.4. Cut the Bloat: Next, they cut out all of the superfluous nonsense. You aren't building houses or catching ponies to raise into warhorses (complete with fully customizable horse armor!). Time isn't wasted creating procedurally-generated quests or finding new ways for AI to make worse versions of what game devs and writers from the 2000s were doing much better. Features like settlements and ship building have their fans, but Starfield made it so clear that development resources are better spent honing the core of the game than loading it up with vestigial stuff.5. Stick to the Plan: Bad ideas always creep into lengthy dev cycles, and TESVI is bound to have plenty. "Wouldn't it be interesting to try adding multiplayer to The Elder Scrolls?" or "Maybe you could grind your skills of materials in a mobile app?" or "Why don't we have a battle pass?" Recognize these ideas for the traps that they are, swiftly kill them, and then get back to making a great game.Bethesda has so much potential to make something incredible and, being under Microsoft now, should have more resources than ever to make that happen. If they succeed, it will be because they use everything at their disposal, refuse to compromise on quality, and stick to a clear vision that made Morrowind, Oblivion and Skyrim massive hits. If they fail, it will be because of hubris, trend-chasing and the refusal to learn from their recent mistakes.Let's hope they succeed! Submitted October 14, 2024 at 09:34AM by GameShrink https://ift.tt/Y7XO1Hd via /r/gaming

[taiblogcomics]

Lordy Lordy, Look Who's 40

Hey there, the Hall of Dangling Onions or Possibly It's Garlic. All right, it's not my usual update day, but we're not doing soda. It's only a day late, I can set my own schedule! I didn't expect to be out of town, and when you get a look at this thing, there's no way I was typing this up on my phone. I was holding onto this one because I wanted to do it as close to Decemberween as possible. MLP has done holiday specials before, but this one's not. But I think thematically, of the issues I have in my backlog, this one fits best here. I hope you'll agree~

Here's the cover:

Yeah! Can you believe that? My Little Pony is forty years old. Think about that a moment! Like, Ghostbusters won't be 40 until next year. The NES won't until 2025. I'm only 37 myself. (I'm 37, I'm not old!) That's wild, huh? Anyway, what's more on-theme for the holiday than kids receiving toys? Like, I think the only MLP toy my sister ever had as a kid was a Christmas one. (It was a G1 Merry Treat, if you were curious.) It just feels on theme. Man, though, I hate to say it, but I do not like this cover. These are some ugly little girls. Like, I don't necessarily like to insult the art styles for these, but maybe stick to drawing horses.

So we open on some rather static poses of some G1-style ponies. Butterscotch announces that Ponyville is in trouble. In fact, the world is ending. They debate this for a while, with Cotton Candy worrying this might be a problem too big for ponies. In G1, this might be so, but by the time of FiM, it's practically a daily event. But it's not an issue, because if there's one thing consistant for every generation of ponies: when they're together, they're unbeatable! Also, they have a secret weapon: this is all being made up by a little girl.

Yeah, the rather static poses and expressions is cleverly foreshadowing that these are all toys, and the scenario is all the imagination of our actual protagonist. She owns two of these figures, Snuzzle and Blossom. Cotton Candy and Minty belong to Tiffany, Butterscotch is Melanie's, and Blue Belle is Kelly's. Refer back to the cover. Starting from top left and going clockwise, you have Melanie, Tiffany, Julie (our protagonist), and Kelly. I hope you're getting all this, because there's absolutely a quiz on it later.

But indeed, this isn't a story about ponies. It's a story about the little girls who love them, which is a really neat idea for the 40th anniversary. Anyway, as you might expect from a group of pre-middle school girls who play ponies in Julie's basement all summer, they're also real horse girls. The lot of them are driven out to a barn where they hang out with some real ponies. And also being girls who are about to enter middle school as summer wanes, there's some angsting among them about remaining friends in the face of this new stage in life.

Now then! Given the G1 ponies, names like "Tiffany", and some of the dress sense, I think it's fair to say it's the 1980s in the comic. Maybe the early '90s at worst. So what's missing from this plot? How about a greedy man in a business suit threatening the continued existence of the farm~? Yes indeed, Julie overhears Mr. Pine in his office, discussing something on the phone. Tiffany sneaks off to the other line and hears the conversation: Grogar Developments (get it?) is planning to bulldoze the farm and build a mall. Oh good, you're almost in middle school, girls! You need a mall to hang out at!

The group resolves to let nothing happen to their favourite hangout, even forming a pinky promise over it. But the very next week, school starts up. The others give Julie their ponies so they'd always have a reason to return to her and to give her some extra courage. Alas, though, real life sets in and the friends begin to drift anyway, with the rigors of middle school both in and after school keeping them apart. Kelly in particular is being kept busy with her schoolwork while her parents glare at her from ten feet away. Even with the Asian stereotypes aside, no pressure, huh~?

Tired of waiting for her friends to call and also just tired in general, Julie drifts to sleep. Upon waking, she's siezed by an idea. In the middle of the night, she slips out and heads to the farm, which is indeed proposed for demolition. She finds a mysterious book under a haystack, and reads out a Latin phrase. Roughly translated (and by "roughly", I mean "I ran it through Google Translate"), it's something like "by the virtue of the universal knight this creature would send the life of addseer into his house". As usual, it probably loses a little something in translation.

The effort of casting a magic spell from a book she knew was hidden in the barn through a dream she had takes a lot out of Julie, and she falls asleep on the hay nearby. When next she wakes, she finds herself surrounded by… ponies! The six ponies that were once her and her friends' toys have been brought to life, expanded to full size. They've heard her plea, and have transported themselves over from Equestria to help her in her time of need. Honestly, this is a lot. Even knowing what franchise I'm reading, I did not expect this angle~

Julie tries to call her friends, who aren't willing to skip school to meet her at the barn. Are you sure they're your friends? Or even real kids, at that point? Before she can follow that up, Julie's surprised from behind and everything goes black. We cut over to the other three friends, who split up despite clearly riding to school together on the same bus. As the day goes on, though, they notice Julie is absent, and they decide to fake being sick and go after her. Oh, so skipping school entirely's a no-go, but ditching it early is just fine?

Upon arrival at the barn, they find Julie tied up and gagged, which is the second time I've had the "I did not expect this comic to go there" feeling. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice. Before they can help their friend, she indicates what's behind them. And they bear witness to their ponies come to life, just as she had. And here's where the third nickel drops: also behind them is Mr. Pine. He's a magician. And what I mean is that he's actually magic. It was his book that Julie found, and while he was content to just open a shopping mall, he'd be even more jazzed to open a portal between dimensions. Sure, we all would!

So, long ago, he was a wizard from Equestria, where he likewise planned to build a shopping mall. I mean, far be it from me to criticise one's magical ambitions, but… I think he could be shooting a little higher. Ah, but here's his grand plan as of now. With the kids in command of the ponies, perhaps they can persuade the tricky equines to open their portal and let him return. Where he can then open two shopping malls! Imagine! Slow down, we got a badass over here. But the girls refuse, telling him they don't control the ponies. They're friends with the ponies.

Cue a two-page spread of Magic Mr. Pine and his goons (yes, he has uniformed henchmen) fighting the girls all riding their magical ponies, all in front of a rainbow backdrop. Fantastic. The power of friendship and the strength of equine legs beat up the villains. And Magic Mr. Pine ends up sealed inside his own book. Victory!

And then Julie wakes up. Yep, it was all just a dream. No Magic Mr. Pine, no portal to Equestria, no book of Latin under the hay, and no talking horses. She never even left home. Before Julie can suck herself back into despair, her mom comes in to give her some good news. Seems the contractor decided to pull out of the deal and not demolish the farm. And even better, all three of her friends are here to cheer her up! They just heard the same news about the farm, and it's this good news that's pulled them together to apologise for their lack of communication lately.

So that was one story! Would you like another?

Well, we celebrated the G1 ponies. Let's leap to the other end of the timescale and do a G5 story! We open at the Brighthouse with Hitch helping to lift a heavy box to a higher level. With some strain, he manages to raise it, collapsing in a heap afterwards. Inquiring what the heck he just hauled, Sunny explains that it's books! It's her dad's old research into previous Equestrian societies. Izzy pokes through some of them, wondering what kind of place Fillydelphia was. Sunny replies that her dad believed they had magical sunshine every day. Oh, ha ha.

One of the dustiest books Sunny finds, however, is called "Tales of Dream Valley". The fun part of this is that, down to the font choice and rainbow banner, it really looks like an old G1 storybook. They find a page of character profiles, running commentary on each of them. Once again we're dealing with Butterscotch, Minty, Blue Belle, Cotton Candy, Snuzzle, and Blossom. This one also correctly names the G1 setting as Ponyland instead of Equestria. Izzy also notes that none of them are unicorns or pegasi, so maybe pony segregation has always been a thing.

The book then immediately contradicts my joke by focusing on Dream Valley, stating that Dream Castle was home to earth ponies, unicorns, pegasi, flutterponies, seaponies, grundles, and bushwoolies. Hitch wonders what bushwoolies are, and boy am I glad some things never came back for future series. Meanwhile, Izzy goes nuts over the concept of seaponies, deeply wishing to call upon them. Sunny points out that all of this could be just stories, and they should do more research. Let's go tell Zipp and Pipp about it, and maybe use the library at their place. This story ends as quickly as it began, with a dedication thanking MLP for being there for so many years and so many stories.

So that was another story! Would you like one more?

We open on a perfectly ordinary suburban-looking home. Like, a human-looking home. And indeed, first thing we see is a human woman coming downstairs to check on a young girl named Bonnie, who is watching an episode of G5 MLP on TV. Aunt Vicki can tell, but she questions why she has so many other screens also. Which Bonnie explains as also having the wiki open on the laptop, and using a tablet to look at MLP comics. She also has her phone out, to talk to her friend Kristen, who's watching at the same time. This kid is incredibly valid and relatable.

Suddenly a storm knocks out the power. While Aunt Vicki goes to check the breaker, Bonnie checks the status of her electronics. Like a fool, she's been running them all unplugged despite being at home, and the battery is at zero for all of them. Man, have you ever had three devices that all ran out of battery simultaneously? That's kind of impressive. But not very helpful for Bonnie's entertainment. Vicki comes back, noting the power's out all over the neighbourhood. So Kristen is probably powerless too, which doesn't cheer Bonnie up.

Aunt Vicki gets an idea, and hauls an old box out of her attic. Inside the box, they find Vicki's old G1 ponies. Minty and Butterscotch, who seem to be universal constants, are here again. Vicki also has a G1 Applejack, leading to Bonnie's confusion about the lack of hat. Vicki laughs at the differences between generations, remarking then that she also once had a Twilight. Not Twilight Sparkle, and not a book about vampires either. And then Vicki enters a lengthy flashback as she remembers her toy.

Way back in 1983, Vicki looked remarkably like her niece. She also had a friend she had an argument with. See, Jessie (her so-called best-friend-forever) went to a sleepover with Caroline and Chelsea and didn't even tell Vicki about it. Jessie points out that Vicki couldn't have even come, she was spending the weekend at her grandparents' house anyway. And she only got invited because her mom is friends with theirs. And turns out, they're pretty nice. So… what now? Is she gonna be their best friend instead?

This is also what Bonnie is wondering. What happened next was: nothing. Turns out you can be friends with multiple people, and the amount of friendship you spread around doesn't actually get smaller! Who knew~? As an apology, Vicki writes Jessie a note declaring this, gifting her Twilight as well. And this is basically the same story with Bonnie and her friend Kristen. Kristen went rollerskating with some other girl, and they fought about it. Bonnie wants to apologise, but can't because her phone's out. Vicki shares something else with her from the past: a land-line phone.

Yeah, I don't buy it. First, Vicki's not that old to still have a landline. If she was a kid in '83? Like, my mum doesn't have a landline, and she's at least 10 years behind that. Vicki's at most mid-40s. Nobody less than 70 has a landline anymore. Secondly, if the power went out, even the landline phones aren't working. That's how it always was when I was a kid. But despite reality, Bonnie calls up her friend and spends a merry time chatting with her, even missing the end of the storm and the beginning of a rainbow. And the comic ends with the power's return, while Vicki sends a photo of Applejack to Jessie, who sends back a pic of her with Twilight.

Well, as an anthology, we should react to the stories individually, yes?

Despite my criticisms, I do like the first story a lot! The premise is fun, and I'm a big sucker for the various '80s/'90s cliches and story beats. But with fair criticism, the art is amateurish at best and bogs the thing down. There's a lot of wasted space, empty backgrounds, and more than a few pages are huge splash pages that could be condensed. I don't think it ruins the experience, but it does dampen the whole thing. The ending is also kind of rushed. Once it dips back into reality, everything just kind of congeals to a finish. If the story had been paced a little better and less padded, it could've been really great.

The second story being set in the G5 universe is a fun spin on the formula, cheekily poking at the differences in the franchise between then and now. Both the art style and the oldness of the book are re-created perfectly. I only wish it was longer, and maybe had some sort of more definitive conclusion.

The third is very nice as well, with a more focused story about the differences in generations--and the things the same about them that bring them together. I like that this one at least brings up FiM a little bit, it seems a bit criminal to celebrate MLP's 40th anniversary and not mention the fourth generation, the one that had the most impact on the franchise's popularity and longevity. You think there'd even be a comic book for your 40th if it wasn't for Friendship is Magic? Highly doubtful. Anyway, Bonnie is relatable as heck with her ADHD screen spread, and she is right to be incredulous about Aunt Vicki's landline.

All in all, as a way to celebrate the franchise's 40th anniversary, this was a great idea. Not just stories about the ponies, but stories about the people ponies were meant for--both then and now.

[bestoffsetsmokers]

Unleashing the Flavor: A Comprehensive Guide to the Best Pit Boss Grills

Hey there, fellow grill enthusiasts! If you're on a quest to elevate your backyard BBQ game, you've landed on the right sizzling spot. Today, we're diving into the world of Pit Boss Grills – your ticket to grilling nirvana. From smoky classics to cutting-edge technology, we'll explore the best Pit Boss Grills that promise to turn your outdoor cooking into a flavorful extravaganza.

What Sets Pit Boss Grills Apart?

Before we get into the nitty-gritty of individual models, let's talk about why Pit Boss Grills stand out in the crowded barbecue arena. These grills are more than just cooking appliances; they're a lifestyle. Here's what makes them a cut above the rest:

1. Innovation Meets Tradition

Pit Boss seamlessly blends innovation with the timeless art of grilling. Whether you're a tech geek or a charcoal purist, there's a Pit Boss Grill that marries modern features with the authentic taste of traditional BBQ.

2. Versatility at Its Core

One word: versatility. Pit Boss Grills aren't one-trick ponies. From smoking and searing to baking and braising, these grills are the ultimate multitaskers, allowing you to unleash your culinary creativity.

3. Bang for Your Buck

Investing in a Pit Boss Grill isn't just a purchase; it's a savvy investment. With durable construction and features that punch above their price range, Pit Boss Grills give you the best bang for your barbecue buck.

The Lineup Unveiled

Let's get into the meaty details (pun intended). Here's a breakdown of the top Pit Boss Grills that are heating up the grilling scene:

Pit Boss Austin XL – The All-Rounder

Meet the Pit Boss Austin XL, the maestro of versatility. This grill boasts a sizable cooking surface, perfect for hosting backyard bashes. With a wide temperature range, it's equally adept at smoking briskets low and slow or searing steaks to perfection.

Pit Boss Navigator – Smart Grilling, Literally

Enter the future of grilling with the Pit Boss Navigator. This smart grill isn't just about looks; it's got brains too. Wi-Fi connectivity, temperature probes, and a user-friendly app make grilling an interactive experience. Who said grilling can't be high-tech?

Pit Boss Sportsman – Tailgate Titan

For those who like to take the party on the road, the Pit Boss Sportsman is your go-to travel companion. Portable, durable, and ready for action, this grill ensures that your tailgate game is as strong as your grilling game.

Pit Boss Pro Series II – For the Serious Grillmaster

Serious about grilling? Meet the Pit Boss Pro Series II. This heavy-duty workhorse is designed for the committed grillmaster who wants precision control, ample cooking space, and durability that can withstand the toughest grilling challenges.

Why Pit Boss Grills Are Game-Changers

Let's peel back the layers and understand why Pit Boss Grills have become the secret weapon of barbecue aficionados worldwide:

Unleashing Flavor with Dynamic Cooking

The Perfect Sear – Every Time

Pit Boss Grills are engineered for the perfect sear. The even heat distribution ensures that your steaks are seared to mouthwatering perfection, locking in those juices and flavors that make each bite unforgettable.

Smoking Done Right

If you're all about that smoke, Pit Boss has your back. The advanced smoking technology in these grills lets you achieve that coveted smoke ring, infusing your meats with a rich, smoky essence that's downright irresistible.

Embracing Control and Consistency

Precision Temperature Control

Say goodbye to guesswork. Pit Boss Grills put you in control with precision temperature settings. Whether you're smoking, roasting, or grilling, maintaining the perfect temperature has never been easier.

Consistency Across the Board

Consistency is the holy grail of grilling, and Pit Boss delivers. The grills are designed for uniform heat distribution, ensuring that every inch of your cooking surface cooks your food to perfection.

Aesthetics That Turn Heads

Sleek Design, Sturdy Build

Grilling is an art, and Pit Boss Grills are the canvas. With a sleek design that combines aesthetics with functionality, these grills don't just cook; they make a statement in your backyard.

Durable Construction

Built like a tank – that's the Pit Boss mantra. The durable construction ensures that your grill can weather the elements, standing tall through countless cookouts and seasons.

Pit Boss Tips and Tricks

Now that you're on the brink of joining the Pit Boss revolution, here are some pro tips to make your grilling journey even more enjoyable:

Seasoning Like a Pro

Before you dive into your first cook, make sure to season your Pit Boss Grill. It's like giving it a warm-up exercise, ensuring that it's ready to deliver those mouthwatering flavors with every dish.

Experimenting with Wood Pellets

One of the charms of Pit Boss Grills is their compatibility with a variety of wood pellets. Experiment with different flavors to find the perfect match for your favorite meats – hickory for a bold kick or cherry for a touch of sweetness.

Cleaning Made Easy

A well-maintained grill is a happy grill. Regular cleaning not only extends the life of your Pit Boss but also ensures that each cook starts with a clean slate. Trust us; your taste buds will thank you.

Getting Creative with Accessories

Pit Boss offers a range of accessories to level up your grilling game. From grill covers to custom grates, these add-ons can enhance your grilling experience and keep you flexing your culinary muscles.

Joining the Pit Boss Community

Last but not least, join the Pit Boss community. Share your grilling triumphs, seek advice, and be part of a passionate group of grill enthusiasts who understand that grilling isn't just a cooking method – it's a way of life.

Conclusion

And there you have it – a sizzling journey through the world of Pit Boss Grills. Whether you're a backyard barbecue beginner or a seasoned grillmaster, these grills are your ticket to flavor-packed adventures. So, fire up your Pit Boss, embrace the smoke, and let the grilling extravaganza begin! Happy grilling, folks!

[robert-sims]

Unleashing the Power of Indorex Flea Spray: A Virbac Marvel

Welcome to the world where pet care meets innovation, and fleas bow down in defeat! In this deep dive into the realm of pest control, we unravel the magic behind Indorex Flea Spray, a gem in the crown of Virbac, a brand synonymous with excellence in animal health.

Understanding Indorex Flea Spray

Indorex Flea Spray isn’t just a repellent; it’s a fortress against the tiny invaders that threaten our furry friends. Designed by Virbac’s team of experts, this spray is a powerful weapon in the war against fleas, ticks, and other pests.

Unlike ordinary sprays, Indorex doesn’t just send fleas packing; it disrupts their life cycle, preventing future generations from causing havoc. The secret lies in its unique formula, a blend of cutting-edge science and a deep understanding of pet behavior.

Engaging Content: Unveiling Virbac’s Arsenal

Virbac isn’t a one-trick pony. It’s a symphony of products, each playing a crucial role in the well-being of our beloved pets. From flea and tick control to dental health, Virbac has crafted a diverse range, ensuring that every aspect of your pet’s health is in safe hands.

Let’s take a closer look at some of Virbac’s star players:

Virbac Epi-Otic Ear Cleaner: Because a healthy pet starts with clean ears! Dive into the world of gentle yet effective ear care with Epi-Otic.

Virbac C.E.T. VeggieDent Dental Chews: Turn dental care into a tasty treat! These chews not only freshen breath but also support your pet’s oral health.

Virbac Nutri-Plus Gel: A nutritional powerhouse, this gel is a blessing for picky eaters and pets in need of an extra nutrient boost.

Reviewing Virbac: Where Quality Meets Compassion

Virbac isn’t just a brand; it’s a commitment to the well-being of our four-legged companions. The quality of their products speaks volumes, earning the trust of pet owners and veterinarians alike.

One aspect that sets Virbac apart is its dedication to research. The brand invests heavily in understanding the unique needs of different pets, leading to products that are not only effective but also tailored to the specific requirements of various breeds.

Virbac’s commitment extends beyond products. They actively engage in educational initiatives, empowering pet owners with the knowledge to provide the best care possible.

Market Trends: Riding the Virbac Wave

The pet care industry is evolving, and Virbac is riding the wave of innovation. With a keen eye on emerging trends, the brand continues to introduce products that align with the evolving needs of pet owners.

According to market analysis, the demand for pet health products is on the rise, and Virbac is at the forefront, consistently delivering solutions that exceed expectations. The market isn’t just about products; it’s about the relationship between pet owners and a brand they can trust.

Authenticity in Every Word

This isn’t your average pet care spiel. It’s a journey into the heart of Virbac, where passion meets precision. The language here isn’t robotic; it’s alive with the spirit of pet lovers who understand that our pets aren’t just animals—they’re family.

So, whether you’re battling fleas with Indorex or embracing dental health with Virbac’s innovative chews, rest assured that you’re not just using products; you’re joining a movement—a movement that values the joy, health, and vitality of our furry companions.

Multimedia Marvel: Data Unleashed

Let’s break it down visually:ProductKey BenefitIndorex Flea SprayBreaks flea life cycleEpi-Otic Ear CleanerGentle and effective ear careVeggieDent Dental ChewsSupports oral health with a tasty twistNutri-Plus GelNutritional boost for picky eaters

Numbers don’t lie, and neither do happy pets! Virbac’s products have garnered rave reviews, with a satisfaction rate soaring high. Check out the data below:

Conclusion: Virbac—Where Every Wag Counts

As we wrap up this journey into the Virbac universe, remember, it’s not just about products; it’s about creating a life full of tail wags, purrs, and playful barks. Virbac isn’t just a brand; it’s a companion in the beautiful journey of pet parenthood.

So, whether you’re battling fleas or simply want to see your pet’s eyes sparkle with health, trust Virbac. Because when it comes to our pets, only the best will do.

Unleash the power of Virbac, and let the adventure of happy, healthy pets begin!

[sunsetconcert]

Artificer: Armorer. Batman literally built himself a suit that looks like it's organic for the sole purpose of freaking people out. He's stuck gadgets into every inch of his suit, from his boots to his belt to his stupid pointy ears. This is a man who would have fun in a supply closet. His dream day out is to go to a hardware store and buying a mountain of crap to duct tape together. Do not leave this man unsupervised.

Barbarian: Totem Warrior, with a Bat Spirit because… Obviously. Batman is an extremely emotional person, and while he typically restrains himself, he often focuses his extreme emotion into his work. This is a man who had one bad thing happen to him when he was eight and he has held that grudge for the next THIRTY YEARS. That's rage, regardless of how he focuses it.

Bard: College of Glamour. Enthralling Performance. Adam West dancing the Batusi. I don't need to explain this further.

Cleric: Twilight Domain. Probably the least likely option on this list, but very possible. Helm, a Twilight domain deity, represents Vigilance and Protection. He's also a figure clad in a full suit of armour that "represented the weight of his heavy responsibility". Would Batman worship a deity? I do not know, but I do know that Helm would admire the steady and thankless work that Batman continues night after night.

Druid: Circle Of The Moon. Now, he might not be in the wild exactly, but "gathers under the full moon to share news and trade warnings" is very much a Bat Family thing. Look me dead in the eye and say that Batman actually shapeshifting into a bat wouldn't be rad as hell.

Fighter: Battle Master. This is described as "employing martial techniques passed down through the generations". And well-rounded fighters of great skill and knowledge? That's Batman, baby. This man could swing a sword, use a shield, he can use a bow, he's a generalist who knows a bit of everything. And yes, this means Batman knows how to street fight and pull off Greco-Roman style grappling. He's not just a one-trick pony who does traditional eastern martial arts.

Monk: Way Of Shadow. Batman has literally trained with every martial artist in the world, and actively made himself the stealthiest bastard you've ever seen. He is ABSOLUTELY going to be skulking around in the dark. The class description LITERALLY calls them ninjas. Also, Pass Without Trace? Darkvision? Those are things Batman can just do in canon. This is probably the most likely one.

Paladin: Oath Of Conquest. At the age of ten years old, Bruce Wayne gave the simplest Oath a man can give - I Will Destroy Crime. He is called a Knight in canon. There are numerous scenes where he swears in his apprentices. Hell, in the Adam West show, he's almost explicitly an Oath Of Crowns Paladin who holds the law paramount, his word as his bond, courage as his solemn duty, and will always do the right thing even if it hurts him personally.

Ranger: Gloom Stalker. "At home in the darkest places, deep beneath the earth, in gloomy alleyways, and wherever else the light dims. They venture boldly into darkness, seeking to ambush threats before they can reach the broader world." Batman. Hell, you could probably say his favoured terrain is cities. Rangers even get a bonus for thrown weapons, so batarangs are on the table here.

Rogue: Inquisitive is about rooting out secrets and unraveling mysteries, relying on a sharp eye for detail and finely honed ability to read people. This is Batman to a T, as more often than not, he wouldn't get anywhere if he was unable to figure out the puzzles set before him. I would also suggest Mastermind, if you wanted to play more of a "Bruce Wayne as a socialite" character. My personal opinion though? PICKING ROGUE IS A BASIC BITCH ANSWER.

Warlock: THIS IS THE ONE OKAY. HEAR ME OUT. HEAR ME OUT. Batman is a Warlock whose patron is a Great Old One, but more specifically, the Spirit Of Gotham. This adds to the overall element that Batman is being consumed by his work - he ABSOLUTELY IS! The Spirit Of Gotham would TOTALLY be trying to destroy Bruce Wayne, to make Batman an eternal servant to carry out its bizarre whims upon the world!

Wizard: Batman's too scientific to be a wizard.

Saw this running around as a poll on youtube, was curious how different the results would be on tumblr.

[bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky]

Number One Fan | Bucky Barnes x Reader

Hi, friends! I bought a Bucky Barnes crewneck from this Etsy shop and it made me think about how the Avengers would react to people wearing their merch. :)

As always, send your comments, requests, and/or suggestions my way! 🥰

Tag list: @beefybuckrrito @shadytalementality @everything-burns-down @rainbow-unicorn-pony @mandersshow @emetophilily @breakablebarnes 💘💘💘

---------------------------------

"He's gonna be so mad!" you howled a devilish laugh that shook your entire body. Sam just nodded, unable to even speak. His shoulders shuddered as waves of laughter pummeled through him one after another. He loved being in cahoots with you.

"Hey, he's the one who won't admit that he likes you," Sam said when he finally composed himself, "and he has to know how you feel about him. It's super obvious".

You gave him a playful punch on the arm at his joke. "It is not 'super obvious.'"

He rolled his eyes and handed you a shopping bag, sending you on your way to carry out the evil plan you'd concocted together.

Racing back to your apartment, you checked the time- 5:49pm. Perfect. Bucky was going to be coming by your place at 6:30 for your weekly movie night, and you were eager to see how he reacted to your mischievous plot. You got home and took a quick shower before grabbing your secret weapon out of the bag and pulling it over your head. Uproarious laughter burst out of your mouth as you looked at yourself in the full length mirror.

"Oh my god, he's gonna fucking die" you eyed your reflection and doubled over with another laugh. "This is too good."

You slipped on a hoodie, concealing the little surprise you had arranged for Bucky and anxiously waited for him to arrive.

At 6:30 on the dot, he knocked on your door, greeting you with a hug. His strong arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you close to his chest- your favorite place to be. When he released you, you noticed he was holding a bottle of your favorite wine.

"Oh, that's so sweet... you didn't have to-"

He shook his head and put his hands up, quieting you. “I was just at the store today and saw it… made me think of you” he said with a wink.

His sweet gesture almost made you feel bad about the prank you were about to pull on him- but it was now or never, and you were choosing now.

Bucky moved to the couch to pull up the movie, asking you about your day as he did so. You made casual conversation as your heart began to beat wildly, knowing that you could possibly fuck up your friendship with him over something so silly.

"Hey, is it hot in here to you? I feel like it's kinda warm" you said as you placed a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table. Bucky just shook his head and settled in to his seat on the couch, patting the cushion next to him as an invitation for you to join.

"I think I'm just gonna take my hoodie off," you said casually. This was it, the moment, the big reveal. Unzipping your jacket, you exposed your scheme for Bucky to see. His mouth hung open as he stared at your outfit for the night.

A blue cotton tshirt plastered with a huge picture of Sam's face and the words "Cap's #1 fan" stared back at Bucky, and it took everything in your power to hold back your laughter.

"You... bought his merch?"

You shrugged and plopped down on the couch next to him, casually throwing a few pieces of popcorn into your mouth. His stunned silence persisted and you turned to him, worried that he didn’t find it funny.

"Fucking Sam Wilson..." he muttered before cracking a small smile. "He put you up to this, didn't he?"

A loud laugh escaped your lips and you nodded, revealing the mastermind behind your scheme.

"You trying to make me jealous, doll?"

You threw him a playful shrug, neither confirming nor denying his assumption. He rolled his eyes at you and reached for the bowl of popcorn that was sitting in your lap.

“So, you’re Cap’s number one fan then, hmm? Anything I can do to maybe get you in my fan club?” Bucky asked as he turned to face you, your bodies mere inches from each other.

A pang of nervousness shot through your chest and your mouth ran dry, coming face to face with the moment you'd been waiting for. "Hmm, I don't know, Barnes," you teased, "I guess that maybe you could-"

Before you could finish your quip, his lips were on yours. His kiss was gentle yet deep, and you sighed into his mouth with the satisfaction that you'd finally gotten him to admit his feelings for you. His hand cupped your cheek and pulled you closer. You let loose as you happily surrendered to his touch; this is all you ever wanted.

"So, would the president of Sam's fan club get kicked out if she went on a date with me?" Bucky asked, shooting you a wink.

"Oh, most definitely- so you gotta make this date worth it".

He held up his hand and crossed his heart with his finger before pulling you back in for another kiss. He paused for a moment and chuckled against your lips, making you pull away.

"What's so funny?"

"I don't mean this to make you uncomfortable but... can you take your shirt off, please?"

"What you don't want Sam staring you down while we make out?"

He shook his head and laughed a loud, genuine laugh the brought a smile to your face.

"Here, let me go change real quick..." you murmured, leaving Bucky alone on the couch as you slipped into your second surprise outfit of the night.

You strode confidently back down the hall toward the living room, and came to a stop in front of the couch in your new outfit. Bucky couldn't help but smile. Delicately hand-stitched into a maroon henley that was almost identical to his were the words "Bucky Barnes's No. 1 Fan".

His mouth hung open, "Did you- did you make that?"

Nodding proudly, you plopped down one the couch next to him. "They didn't have any Bucky Barnes merch- which I think is bullshit by the way- so I had to make my own. My mom taught me how to embroider when I was little."

He wrapped his arms around you tightly and pulled you into the couch cushions while pressing kisses to your face and neck. Uproarious laughter escaped your lips as you squirmed under his grasp.

"Not only are you my number one fan, but I think you may be my only fan, doll." Bucky said with a laugh as you recovered from his attack. Still catching your breath, you shook your head.

"Don't be silly, Buck," you teased, "Sam is a close number two".

[coco-kyoko]

Ask the Cookies Recap 10: Filling a Void (ongoing(tm))

The current arc of the series.

Owing to how recent this arc is, I’m including a lot of detail. This is because I know stuff’s going to be important.

Leading on immediately from the previous arc... The Marble Lily.

A slight flashback to start. Remember how Miss Void, Cay’s teacher, was visiting Cay? Well, here’s why!

Redolent Void commissioned Cobalt Cookie for a special crystal.

Meanwhile, the rebels are busy.

And they’ve got a new agent...

So, you know, that’s a bit of fun.

Redolent wants to bring Cay into her project. Still wishing to recruit her.

But she’s not the only one with her eyes on Cay...

Cobalt completes her commission! It’s a special crystal...

But she’s getting these weird prank calls that she keeps missing.

Cayenne picks it up, ready to deliver it to Miss Void.

And the secret service appear! I’m actually pretty sure he has no jurisdiction in the Hors-Chaan protectorate.

Spring has been following a rebel cell. They’ve been up to something. A new secret weapon to surpass Metal Gear.

Oh no, it turns out the teacher was evil! And Onyx is her puppet, willing to do anything to get Cay back.

And Redolent is Perilous’ Sister! The family tree expands!

While I’m at it, lets have Spring Serenade do my job and recap stuff.

Basically they manage to sum up in five panels what took me 30. Back in Recap 5. Ah well, at least they’re done stealing my job...

...And then Cobalt steals my job and sums it all up in one panel.

Meanwhile, the ship is getting ready. The power source is in the machine.

But Onyx is getting second thoughts... She turns on her master, hoping to save her beloved.

Onyx is not a hero. Onyx is just a pony who is trying to do good, at the darkest times.

Thinking that Miss Void has killed her friend, Cayenne gets angry. Anger leads to dark magic... And this dark magic is being used to power a cannon!

Oh no! The plan is almost complete!

Cobalt saves the day by destroying the cannon! Now to deal with the rebels and save her cousin!

And they fight, and Cobalt’s barely winning! With a mighty thud, she strikes Miss Void back and...

...And that’s where we are today.

[multific]

Trainers

Owen Grady x Reader

Summary: You are the trainer of the Mosasaurus, you have been working with her since she was a tiny little thing. So, you don’t appreciate when another trainer is asked to check on the work you have been doing.

 You understood that Claire wanted results. But they never understood that a creature such as a dinosaur is not as easy to train as a dog. Nevertheless, when the owner of the park specifically asked for you to be the caretaker of the Mosasaurus, you just knew you had to accept. Being a well respected Marine Biologist in your field, you loved the different challenge this would bring. Although you had to do a lot of studying. You would normally focus on a lot of species, so only having to deal with one animal was quite different. 

When you first saw her, you knew, you understood just how special she really was and you fell in love with the tiny being. Well, back then she was the size of an alligator, but then she grew into her normal size. She got huge. Even her tank spoke to itself.

Momo was chosen to do one of trick for the public. To eat a shark from a hook, splashing water onto the crowd. You knew she wasn’t a circus animal. You understood that, but since you two spent so much time together, a bond formed between you two. And you were more than surprised when she listened to you. 

One late night you were sitting by her tank, looking at her as she swam around. This was all she knew, the water, the hook and you. You often went to the Underwater Observatory where you can look into her tank through the glass. You spoke to her days on end as you just sat there after you finished with your work for the day. 

And one day, it happened.

Just like a dolphin show, you were talking and motioning around and when you moved your hand up as an expression, she jumped out of the water. The very first instant this happened, you didn’t pay much mind to it, thinking it was a coincidence. But then she did it again and again. Just as you lifted your hand up each time.

Progress.

Of course, you were to report every incident, but you chose not to tell them about this new revelation. You were afraid they will exploit her for money even more.

So, as you never reported any progress, Claire decided to send another trainer in.

Owen Grady.

He was supposed to look at your work for a month. You hated being supervised like that.

“Mr. Grady, nice to meet you, my name is Y/N Y/L/N. I’m Momo’s caretaker.”

“Please just call me Owen. To be honest I’m as happy to be here as you are. I’d rather be with my girls, so please just give me a quick run through, so I can leave.” 

“Okay...But, Owen. Claire said that you are to watch me for a month.”

“A MONTH? She didn’t mention that to me. Or I wasn’t listening. Probably the latter.” he made you laugh a little. Maybe it was better that he was the one who was sent and not some uptight ass. 

“Alright. So, it’s hard to miss her tank, or her. She eats a lot. There are public feedings, every two hour she gets a shark. I have been with her since she was born. Little thing she was. She is very stubborn, but I did hand feed her in her early years. She gave me a lovely scar too. From my wrist to my pinky on my left hand.” you showed him the scar. “Silly mistake. But I learned from it.”

“Do you talk to her?”

“I do. Steve thinks I’m mental, since she is under water, she wouldn’t hear. But I like to think that she somehow feels that I talk to her you know?”

He nodded and looked around, then up. He noticed a long walking platform way up high. 

“What’s that?” you looked up where he was looking.

“That is the new idea. Guests would be able to go up there and watch her from there. But they are not sure if she can jump that high, so it’s still not very safe. Although I told them that she wouldn’t be able to, they want to be safe. We can go up if you want to.”

You hated being up there, your fear of heights didn’t help you either. 

“You okay there?” Owen asked as he watched you taking deep breaths and your hands gripping the railing.

“No. I hate it up here.”

“Then why did you suggest to come up?” he laughed.

“I don’t know. It was silly. Can you see her?”

“Yes. She is...swimming. Shockingly. She is 84 feet long and she weights over 30,000 lbs, when the last time we checked. She is rather calm. Prefers to swim around and eats when she is supposed to. She is not socialized with other dinos, considering that the majority would drown in her enclosure. Can we go down now, please?”

Owen stood there, looking at the huge water monster swimming right below him. Then he looked up at you, and gave you a nod.

***

Owen has been working with you for the last week. He gave many ideas on what to do and how to earn their trust.

You also didn’t fail to notice how muscular and handsome he was. 

Each morning he arrived on his bike, looking sexy as can be. And every day he observed you. He watched as you said hi to her every morning, said how you liked to make sure her food was correctly prepared. It was obvious for him that you cared about the Mosasaurus very much. 

Owen wasn’t sure what else they wanted from the dino himself, He knew they created her as an amusement for viewers as a feeding show and nothing more. So, then why did Claire wanted him to come here and watch over you. As far as he was concerned, this particular dino wasn’t even the need of a caretaker. She just swam around and ate sharks as an attraction. He suspected there was something more behind the story he had been told. 

Owen admittedly loved the Underwater Observatory. It was cool down there, not only the weather, but they you can look into the enclosure and watch the majestic beast.

He also took a liking to it’s trainer. Even if he wasn’t sure what you were training the dino to do.

“How about tomorrow you come over to the raptors? I can show them off for you like you did with Momo.” Owen came up with the idea on his second week during lunch time.

“Oh, sure. I would like to.” Little did he know that you showed the very least to him.

During his two weeks, Owen and you formed some kind of friendship. You would be lying if you said that you didn’t like him, even if you knew about the rumors about his dating methods. But he never once hinted on anything with you. Or you just didn’t notice. Which was also a possibility, you were quite oblivious with men.

So, the next day after making sure that Momo was all set and healthy, we headed to the raptors. 

Although I wasn’t that interested in land species, his four girls amazed you. 

“Wow. they listen to you so well.” you said smiling at him as you watched the four inside the paddock. 

Owen looked very proud of himself. 

You spent all day at the velociraptor paddock. Owen told you about the plans that they had. And it was exactly what you feared would happen to your girl.

Exploiting them for military or personal gain. 

The thought disgusted you.

These were amazing creatures. In your opinion you should be learning from them, and not using them for war.

In the evening, everyone has left, you and Owen were still at the raptors’ paddock. You looked down at them running around.

“I don’t want Momo to have the same fate. Military? Really? That’s what we are doing now? These creatures are amazing, beautiful. Even the fact that we keep them on display is rather disgusting let alone using them as weapons.”

“I agree with you. But I can also see how they would be able to save many lives. Men and women.”

“But they will never be able to control them like that. Not by their own free will. It takes time. You have known them since they were little. Momo is... she is basically an attraction to them, nothing more. They wanted me to each her tricks. Like she was a fucking pony. Jumping through loops and whatnot. And when I refused, they threatened to throw me out. So, I had to come up with something. Telling them that she is not able to do such things. Even if it’s a lie.” you eyes widened at what you just said. You just confessed your greatest secret. 

“What do you mean lie? So, she can jump?” you panicked a little but his calm demeanor helped you a little.

“S-She can. Not as high as those railings go but...She can. Oh, Owen, please don’t tell Claire. They will make her into a complete circus animal, more than she already is.” you didn’t even realize but you were so desperate that you grabbed his forearm, pleading with him.

“I won’t. I promise. I decided on my second day over there that I will tell her that you are taking a good care of her and that a Mosasaurus is not a dolphin you can teach tricks to. But I’m clearly wrong. Could you show me?”

You were soon standing by her tank. Owen looked down at the water.

“I never understood. If she can get the shark from there, why doesn’t she jump out to get the guests?”

“Well, one, they are too small, so she is not interested and two, her species main food source comes from the water or from above such as flying dinosaurs. But as you can see her water is lower than the path, they made this safe so she wouldn’t jump out and eat guests.”

“I see. So how does this work? I don’t guess that you whistle to her.” Owen said as he stood next to you.

“No. I just...” it was easier to show him, so you reached your hand out as far as you could before moving it up.

And just as you did, she jumped out of the water and back in, as elegantly as a dino of her size possibly could. 

“Wow.” Owen watched as the water splashed neither of you cared that you were soaked.

“One night. I was talking to her. And as I moved my hand, she started doing things. She can also spin, but that looked better down under the water.”

“She listens to you.”

“I like to think that if I was to fall into the water one day, she won’t eat me immediately, but I might be too naïve.” Owen looked at you and all he could think is how beautiful you looked.

“This really is something else. You must have an amazing bond.” you smiled at Owen who got your now soaked wet hair out of your face. He slowly leaned down and was about to place his lips on yours when another sudden splash of water interrupted him. He groaned and as he looked down at the water noticed Momo slowly descending into the water. 

You only laughed at the annoyed expression on Owen’s face.

“Maybe take me on a date first, Mr. Grady, I think then she will approve.” you said as he finally looked back at you.

His eyes softened.

Maybe you will thank Claire later for sending Owen over. Who could have thought that two trainers would find each other on an island like that? 

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~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

My taglist is open!

Feedback is greatly appreciated. Thank You for reading my story!~

[ask-de-writer]

THE PRICE OF AMBER : Part 15 of 23

This takes place shortly after MASTER SARGENT (RET.) WARRIN’S HEARTHWARMING  

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THE PRICE OF AMBER

Part 15 of 23

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

29012 words

New to the story?  Read from the beginning HERE  

© 2020 by Glen Ten-Eyck

Inspired by a bit of silliness shared with

@frostlass-and-the-gang

All    rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or   to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the   express  written consent of the author.

//////////////

Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users    of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They   may   reblog the story provided that all author and copyright   information   remains intact.  They may use the characters or original   characters in   my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical   compositions.

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

///////////////////////

There were two doors to the comfortably appointed conference room separated by a short hallway.  Arianne explained as she conducted her guests in, “The outer door must be shut and locked from the inside before the inner door to the secure room can be unlocked.  If the outer door moves after we have gone in, we will receive an alarm.”

With us all seated about the table, Arianne wanted to know, “Princess Luna, you have ordered this meeting.  Will you please tell us the reason for it?”

“With pleasure, Countess Arianne.  My Agent, Dawnfire, is a very perceptive pony.  He saw a news report in the Canterlot Crier that set a train of thought in motion.  He reported it to me at a breakfast conference some time ago but after your invasion of Prance was well underway.

“As a result, I have ordered some very secret tests done and may include units using Dawnfire's idea into Our armed services.  The way that you move forces leads me to think that he has sussed out a secret of your success against the armies of Prance.”

Arianne tilted her head and carefully regarded Dawnfire.  “Would you tell us what it is that you have sorted out, my lord Dawnfire?”

He chuckled, “I have read a whole bunch of treatises and several books by reputable generals, not all Equestrians, on the military uses of teleportation.  Basically they all agree.  It is functionally useless for any tactical or strategic situation.  About the only thing that they have found is single ponies infiltrating past guards on camps. Even that is known to be unreliable.

“I think that I have found a way to use it very efficiently for both troop and weapons transport, supply and reconnaissance.  And do so with great secrecy.”

Countess Arianne asked, “And where would any leader find as many unicorns well trained in a difficult art like teleportation?”

Dawnfire snorted, “You don't.  The thing that makes it difficult and dangerous is simple.  When one teleports, the natural tendency is to take a volume around the unicorn with them.  On a long jump that can be a sphere of several meters diameter.  Even a short jump will take along some besides the unicorn.   But I am not telling you anything new.  I think that you are using that large volume that moves with a unicorn that has only enough training to actually make a T-jump.”

Celestia's ears perked up!  “How can you use a T-jump that drags along several tonnes of unwanted dirt, worms, rocks and maybe parts of trees?”

Dawnfire shrugged, “It is called cooperation.  I saw a news story printed in the Canterlot Crier where daring pegassi in flying hazmat gear rescued earth ponies and unicorns trapped on the roof of a burning building.  It took four of the pegassi with a transport net to carry two ponies at a time from the rooftop.

“My idea is that four pegassi without that burden of hazmat suits, could fairly easily lift a unicorn and a pony's weight of weapons and ammo. The unicorn does not need to learn how to restrict the volume of his T-jump.  In fact, quite the reverse.  The pegassi lift him and the cargo up well clear of taking unwanted stuff along and the unicorn should be able to T-jump the whole group several kilometers at least. Maybe up to five.  If they are going a long distance, they stay airborn and as fast as the unicorn can get his next jump target, they are gone.

“When they get to the planned target, the pegassi glide in for silence and land.  They unload the weapons and ammo and two stay as strike troops.  The other two fly the unicorn up to jumping altitude and they go back the same way that they came and get another load and two more pegassi.  If it is just troops, the procedure is the same but the load is another pony in war kit.”

Arianne sucked in her cheeks and nodded slowly.  “Very nearly exactly what I am doing, yes.  Is this conference to verify that or would Your Highnesses like full details?  He mentioned reconnaissance and I would have his ideas on that first, if it is alright.”

Princess Luna nodded, “It is both.  I wanted to share this with you and to learn from you.  Later after things have settled down, I would like to have your veterans who know the ins and outs of the method to provide some units of our army with training in its use.  It will be kept a secret for as long as we can.”

Arianne smiled at Dawnfire as she explained, we have a modest padded wicker bed for the unicorn's comfort.  Our loads are on lightweight skid pallets that the two lead pegassi are harnessed to before they go. When they land, they simply drop the net and pull the pallet off it. The back two are rigged to the front corners of the net as well as the back.  When they take off, the unicorn on his flight pad is automatically kept level if the pegassi have proper training in flight coordination.  That actually takes longer than training the unicorns for this kind of T-jumping.

“Recon is a weak point with us.  We use a team of three, two pegassi and a unicorn.  The unicorn jumps them and makes sketch maps as they go. They are in possible sight from the ground for too long.  It works but I wish that there was a better way.”

Dawnfire smiled back at her.  “There is.  It uses your team of three but the unicorn carries a Magic Net mirror.”

Arianne nodded, “We tried that but the field of view is too narrow.”

Dawnfire agreed, “It would be if the mirror was all that you used.  The University in Canterlot has a really fun set of lab curiosities. Where most lenses focus things, like a telescope, meaning getting a lot of light but only a small field of view, they have lenses and the rules for making them that take in very wide fields of view that they focus on a ground glass screen.  I got a set of those and put them in front of a mirror like any pony carries in their saddlebag.  I had to borrow the meter square mirror but it got the picture that the small mirror was sending.

“Princess Luna told me that it might be of interest, so I brought a copy of what I got.  To get the image, just lay a sheet of paper on the big mirror and use contagion magic to transfer the picture.  Only takes a few seconds per picture.”  He reached into his saddlebag and produced a folded up paper.

Arianne stared at it.  She took out a magnifying glass and stared more.  “How long did this take to make?”

“About ten minutes.  I gave the small mirror to pegasus who flew it over Tailswitch.  I used the mirror to tell him where I wanted him to be and copied the picture by non Equine contagion magic.  Then he brought it back.”

Arianne put a hoof solidly on the table.  “I need those lenses!  Please get them for me.”

Luna pushed the paper over to Celestia and said, “See why I was keeping nosy nobles away from Dawnfire?”

“Have you had any other ideas along these lines Dawnfire?”

He pulled a face with sucked in cheeks and said, “Well, yes.  It is kind of insensitive to mention here, though.  Bombs.”

Arianne went still.  After a moment she took a deep breath and said, “No, Dawnfire, it is not insensitive.  What is needed most in any war is to save the lives of our troops.  Tell me of these bombs.  How are they different from what Prance used to burn the castle, barracks and armory last Hearthwarming?”

“Very well, your Ladyship.  First, the ones used in General Falshort's attack were small.  For some reason, the pegassi of Prance are quite large as pegassi go.  From what I was able to find, they have the same basic amount of flight magic as our smaller Equestrian pegassi. There is not enough flight magic left to manage weather control. They buy it from Cloudsdale.  Their wing spread makes cooperation in lifting difficult.  They can't lift as much either.  On average, only about fifteen kilograms.  Their bombs were of that size.  

“Our pegassi can lift a lot more and cooperate to lift really large loads. Start with your usual team of five.  They can lift a unicorn to teleport them and about 275 kilograms besides.  Bombs of any size up to that weight can be made. Fasten them to the underside of the carrying net with quick release knots.

“Even if they are seen, pegassi can not get up to their altitude before they drop the bombs and teleport away.  Unicorns magic can only reach up about 300 meters tops.  If the falling weapon weighs from fifty kilograms on up, no unicorn on the Equestrian world can deflect it from its fall.”

Arianne had a hoof over her forelock and was shaking with sobs.  “I thank you master Dawnfire.  It is hard to think of these things, it is true.  They are also necessary.

“Let us all repair to the Great Hall, where dinner awaits us.”

TO BE CONTINUED

<==PREVIOUS ~~ NEXT==>

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[notsowrites]

Untitled 3x02 Coda #1

If RNM isn’t going to give us Malex, fine. That’s what fanfic is for.

---------

Outside the cave, far enough that Jones can't hear him, Michael lets go of all the anger and frustration that's built up over the past several hours. Hears tree limbs snap and rock tumble and crash around him, and when he opens his eyes it looks like a small tornado has passed through the area. His truck is untouched, right where he parked it outside the cave entrance, and Michael runs a hand over the driver side door, taking a deep breath. He does feel slightly better now, his skin no longer feels too tight, his mind isn't racing quite so quickly.

He drives. Away from Jones, and away from the caves. He thinks of stopping at the Pony, drowning himself in alcohol - except for the fact that Maria is still angry at him. But he won't apologize for that. He still can't believe how reckless she was, jumping off the roof of the Crashdown in some dumbass attempt to trigger her visions.

Thinking of her reminds him of her words again, how she'd pointed out he never seemed to have any ill effects from using his abilities. How had he not noticed? How had Max and Isobel not noticed? Had they chalked it up to the booze and acetone? Did they really think he was that much of a drunk to never say anything as they chugged acetone after using their abilities?

Alex had made comments. Several, over the past couple years. Ones that struck him to his core that Alex would assume something like that. Maybe he deserved it, choosing booze and acetone to quiet the chaos of his mind, needing to silence it somehow and not knowing how.

Even when he tries not to think about Alex, his mind eventually settles there, and Michael tries not to think too hard about that. What it means.

He realizes he's a block away from Alex's house, and turns down the street. The lights are off, except for the yard lights, and Alex's SUV is missing. He lets the truck idle, as he looks over the house, mentally scolding himself why he'd ended up here of all places. Alex doesn't need to hear about Michael's issues.

It's probably a stupid decision, Michael thinks, as he turns off the engine and pushes open the door, walking around to the rear of his truck and pulling down the tailgate. He's spent enough time tonight sitting outside his trailer, lost in his thoughts. The change of scenery might be good - even if this is where he ended up.

What Michael doesn't expect is Alex's SUV to appear not soon afterward. And what he really doesn't plan on seeing is Alex in his dress blues uniform as he steps out of the car. The shirt is open, hanging loose and revealing a white tshirt underneath. There's something clutched in his hand that Michael can't make out, and thinks maybe it doesn't matter.

"What are you doing here, Guerin?" Alex sounds tired. About as tired as Michael feels.

"I was trying to clear my head, and I just-" he stops and shakes his head, realizing how stupid this was. "I'll get out of your way." 

"No, that's not-" Alex takes a step forward, his hand reaching towards Michael, like he's going to stop him. "That's not what I meant. Sorry, it's been a long day." 

Michael laughs. "Tell me about it." He nods at Alex, trying to indicate his uniform. "Fancy Air Force thing?"

Alex bites his lip, and turns away, like he's debating talking about it at all. And Michael knows Alex has his secrets, doesn't always tell people what he's doing - hell, he up and left for a year to clean up Project Shepherd and barely told anyone. "Something like that."

Michael nods, understanding. But he also knows Alex is lying, he just doesn't understand why.

"You've been gone so long - there's a lot happening here too." 

"Kyle told me about Max. I'm so sorry, Guerin."

"You know, last year, after everything, after nearly losing him, I thought things were getting better. Maria broke up with me, you disappeared - but I had Max and Isobel. And now-" Michael hates how deeply it hurts to think about losing Max again. For good. 

"But he can't be saved again?" 

"He doesn't want to be."

Alex looks taken aback, and Michael just feels frustrated. How much does he even want to tell Alex? Everything? He doesn't know. But maybe - maybe when Alex said he wanted to be friends, this is what he meant.

"How could he not?" 

"His body is rejecting Noah's heart. He's known since last year, and never said a goddamn word about it." He hopes Alex can read what he's not saying, the words he can't bring himself to say - about how angry he is at Max for this decision, for not saying anything, for not letting them try and figure out a way to save him. Because he doesn't know what he's going to do if Max dies.

Michael's not sure he can stand losing anyone else.

"And there's no other aliens to do a heart transplant," Alex says quietly. sitting down on the tailgate next to him, fidgeting with the thing in his hands until Michael realizes it's part of his uniform as the light reflects off a Captain's bars badge.

Except there is someone. 

There is someone in a cave out in the desert, locked up behind a cage that he built. Someone who is a replica of Max, who shares his DNA, who could be an exact match for Max.

"That's not - there might be someone."

"What?" 

Taking a deep breath, Michael closes his eyes and stubbornly chooses not to look at Alex. "Last year, out in the desert, we found the stowaway who crashed the ship. My mother - Isobel and my mother - they had locked him up down in a cave." 

"A year ago?" 

Yeah, Michael realizes how ridiculous it probably sounds to somehow else.

"Iz and I have been trying to get answers from him, about where we came from, and why we're here-" 

"Everything you've wanted to know."

This is where it gets difficult, and Michael pushes up off the tailgate, pacing around the driveway, rocks kicking up beneath his boots as he walks, Alex's gaze on him, but Michael can't focus on that right now. 

"Maybe not! Because everything he says makes me wonder if anything Tripp wrote in that journal was true. Because according to him, she and Isobel's mom engineered Max as a weapon to fight back against some sort of planetary dictator, and kept him a prisoner."

"Guerin," Alex says, cutting into his rant. "I was there with you that day at the prison. She loved you. Even I could see that. So maybe it's not as black and white as you think."

"He said she chained up a kid, Alex," he snaps, his skin suddenly feeling too tight, his mind racing too fast. "What part of that isn't black and white?"

Too caught up in his pacing, in the chaos building in his mind, Michael spins on his heel and almost runs into Alex, who is standing in front of him now, hand held out in front to keep Michael from plowing him over. But it doesn't matter, because he feels himself shatter from the inside out, the tears in his eyes spilling over. He'd already cried once today over what he thought he knew about his mother, wasn't that enough?

"She loved you," Alex insists, his voice sounding annoyingly firm. "She found a way to travel across the universe because she loved you."

He hates how Alex makes it sound so simple, as if that love should be enough. But when has love ever done him any good? He'd told Isobel once, love is the worst thing that ever happened to me and hates that it's still true. His mother had loved him, and ended up here, where she'd died without ever getting to see him. He loved Alex, and that had been nothing but pain and heartache. He loved Maria, who instead had broken up with him. He loved Max and Isobel, and yet now Max was deciding to leave him.

"To escape a dictator! To escape someone who is my-" Michael stops short, pulling his words back. He doesn't want to call someone who is a dictator his father. He doesn't want to use that word. "I'm just the product of my mother needing to convince the dictator she was on his side."

Alex reaches out, taking his left hand, the hand still covered by the bandana because of Max's stupid decision to heal it without permission. The hand that he needed to keep the reminder that it's not worth it to think there's good in anything. Michael is glad when Alex doesn't try to remove it, just wraps his fingers around the palm and holds their hands up against his chest, near where Alex's heart is. 

"Even if that's what she did, it doesn't mean she loved you any less."

He hates how convinced Alex sounds, as though the rest of it doesn't matter. He wishes it were that simple, that he could just forget everything else.

With one last squeeze of his hand, Alex lets them drop, and nods towards his house. "It's been a hell of a day - wanna come in and I'll tell you about it?"

Alex's military service is something Michael has never been fond of. The fighting, the rules, the fact that it's the reason Alex got injured - but maybe, he thinks, maybe tonight it'll be a good distraction for him.

He nods, and follows Alex inside.

[seyenna]

Philza and/or Techno and/or Ranboo fic recs

just some of my fav dsmp fics, mainly phil, techno or ranboo bc i’m biased but also a bunch of sbi and others

this one goes out mainly to zablr discord my beloved

pls tell me if the links don’t work

all of these are on ao3

rating\status(complete/ongoing)\warnings\word count\misc tags

ichor flows free amongst the iron by summer_rising

T\o\violence\13k\series\gods AU

Summary:

A gods and goddesses AU of the Dream SMP, dramatized for all our benefits.

First work:

  "Two gods meeting on a mountaintop overlooking the stormy sea? Very classy, Dream, I appreciate your taste."

  Dream didn't turn to look at him, but the faint shake of his shoulders let Techno know he had heard.

  "Scar's healing up nicely, I see," Techno mumbled with a light nod of his head.

  "Mhm. Cut nice and clean. Not that I expected any less from you, of course."

   ~~

   The god of power and the god of luck meet on a mountaintop to discuss Luck's standing in the ongoing political disaster.

We're Only Young by ImperialKatwala

G\o\-\66k\series\Dream & Technoblade

It's easy to forget amid the chaos and bloodshed how similar - and how young - Dream and Technoblade really are.

And when the sun comes up, you'll find a brand new god. by SkyboxZoo

M\o\violence\19k\gods AU

Summary:

The wounds from the fight had healed nigh instantly, but the golden blood still soaked Techno’s shirt. His cloak had gotten torn off and his hair had fallen out of its pony-tail. Ichor pooled in his boots. The man left a trail of golden, bloody footprints in his wake.

old gods (new gods) by WriterWinged

T\o\-\9k\series\gods AU

Summary of first work:

Survival, Blood, Madness. Philza, Technoblade, Wilbur Soot. Three gods who have never cared for mortal life, who play with them when they want to, who kill their toys just as easily. How, then, did a mortal end up in their hands?

This House Is A Fucking Nightmare by SilverWing15

T\c\-\17k\series\sbi

Summary:

AU Where Phil isn't quite as willing to stand by while his sons drop like flies

Summary of third part (my fav):

Does lingering too long in the shadow of a god make you a god? The voices in his head seem to think so.

His brothers know he's older than them but they don't know how much

OR: Technoblade doesn't think his brothers realize how different they are from ordinary men. After all, ordinary men may fight the gods, but they don't win.

It's been a long day. by BecausePlot

G\c\-\3k\Philza & Ranboo

Summary:

Sides are bad: he knows that much. He’s seen it tear people apart time and time again, so when he decided to separate himself from Tubbo and keep his distance, he knew he was in the right.

Well. He thought he was in the right, at the time. Sitting all by himself on the steps to the Prime Path, he’s not so sure anymore.

Yes, the sides might have torn the others apart, might have made them so weak that they have no choice but to fold under Dream’s hand, but at least they aren’t lonely.

So are sides bad?

‘I don’t know.’

~*~

Or, Ranboo looks out at the ruins of L'Manburg, feeling more lost and lonely than he ever has.

But, as he soon finds, he's not as alone as he thinks.

the voices in my head, they say a lot of things by rosyasteria

-\c\violence\1k\Technoblade-centric

Summary:

Some days the voices didn’t listen. They didn’t let up. They screamed instead of whispered, relentless, assaulting his ears until they bled.

tell them i was the warmest place you knew and you turned me cold by rosyasteria

-\c\-\2k\Techonblade-centric

Summary:        

Technoblade cared. But in the end it just fucked him over.

For the majority of his life, Techno felt like less of a companion, less of a family member, and more like a weapon to be wielded. 'The Blade' they called him; never 'friend'.

It Leaves Little Time for Anything Else by mirandible

M\c\-\1k\part of series\Dream & Technoblade

Summary:

   A young man aims for the top, but fate has other plans for him. So does Technoblade, apparently.

   (Or: answering the question of “Why does Techno hide his scars if they’re supposed to be some sort of trophy? Why keep your point of pride a secret?”)

the best requiem is a bar of silence (and I'll sing it, even if I must hold back my tears) by jello12451

T\o\-\10k\Philza & Technoblade

Summary:

   He can’t help the noise of celebration that escapes him. Techno- this means that Techno’s free, and he got his horse back, and everything is alright-

  Tubbo, filled with rage at Phil’s cheers, turns and impulsively shoots an arrow.

   He doesn’t expect to hit his target.

---

  Alternatively: What if Phil didn't have a bucket of water when Tubbo shot him?

Change fate by being aggressively kind by sircantus

T\o\-\13k\sbi, Philza-centric

Summary:

   “You do understand that you’re caring for the thing meant to bring destruction and chaos to our world, right?” The woman asks, Phil looking behind him fondly as Techno grabs at the ends of his wings.

   “He’s just a child.” Phil answers distractedly, humming as his wings get gently yanked at.

   “He’s the first of three to destroy life as we know it! Shouldn’t we, well, get rid of him?!”

   “Oh, no.” Phil raises his eyes with a sharp glare. “Believe me, I have my own way of preventing the apocalypse.”

   ---

   Or, Techno, Wilbur, and Tommy are basically chaotic forces of nature, destined from birth to end the world and bring destruction. Most who hear of the tale of them are trying their best to track them down, and to end the monsters while they’re still young, still just children.

   Phil has a different plan.

   (In which Phil raises the minecraft equivalents of the anti-christ with love and support, so much so to the point where the world ending is really just a funny thought, and Phil has three kids who casually have powers that are bit more extreme than anything else in the world)

I promised you that everything would be fine by findingkairos

G\c\-\6k\Technoblade-centric

Summary:

   manifestation: (n.)

1.     an event, action, or object that clearly shows or embodies something abstract or theoretical;

2.     a version or incarnation of something or someone;

3.     an appearance of a ghost or spirit;

4.     the Blood God.

When he's young and still alone, still establishing his reputation as the immortal warrior, Technoblade makes up an imaginary friend.

Years later, the blood god is very real and very much a god: one that is prepared to do anything for their first and only friend.

the inner mechanism of a black box by Bee_4

T\c\violence, self-harm\Technoblade-centric

Summary:

   Technoblade lets himself get imprisoned for Philza’s sake. He doesn’t plan on being there long. Unfortunately, he’s underestimated Pandora’s Vault.

   There are things that will make even the Blade fall apart in due time, as it turns out.

carry all my sins by BananasofThorns

T\c\-\4k\Ranboo-centric

Summary:

Ranboo swallows. “All my armor and weapons and stuff are missing. Fundy and I were gonna go looking for them after the festival, I think.”

“I see.” Tubbo smiles again, but this time it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Well, I’m sure it’ll be fine, it’s just a festival. We could probably find someone to lend you a sword or an axe or something.”

He starts towards the stage, waving at people when they call his name, and Ranboo follows. The original panic has dulled to a cold buzz in his chest, but apprehension still wraps itself around his body like chains. He doesn’t like being without his armor and tools; he feels too exposed, and if something happens, he’ll be helpless.

“Ranboo?” Tubbo calls, glancing back.

Ranboo shakes his head and hurries to catch up. “Yeah, it’ll be fine,” he repeats. “Everything’s gonna be fine."

Tubbo grins. “That’s the spirit.”

Rule 5: be loyal. L'manberg doesn't do well with supposed traitors. Ranboo deals with the consequences.

Sojourn by Lacy_Star

T\o\-\13k\Ranboo & Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

“Well…” Ranboo started slowly, “You see, uh… I kinda… don’t have a house anymore, obviously. Um… Phil found me in—“ He paused, cutting himself off and squinting at the floorboards— very discreet, “Phil… found me. And… um… He said I could stay by you guys. Like, um, by the dog house he wants to build?” He paused, then began to ramble, “But, uh, if you don’t want me here, I understand— and I’m sorry for coming in your house when you weren’t here, I swear I didn’t touch anything— it was just cold outside and—“

Techno just stared at him. And how, how was this the second time this had happened to him? How was this the second time he returned home after battle to discover an injured teenage boy waiting for him, seeking assistance with nowhere to go? And how badly had that ended last time, in nothing but betrayal and insults?

---

AKA: Phil drags a half-enderman home after Doomsday, and Techno decides that they can keep it. For now.

can an axe count as rent? by aboutfivebees

T\c\-\4k\Ranboo & Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

Ranboo’s struggling to settle into his new life on the Arctic Anarchist Commune, but at least he’s got bread.

or the struggles of an enderman hybrid to come up with a housewarming gift to give to his friends, who are just trying to adopt him

The Caged Bird Sings of Freedom by StarPrince_Punk

T\o\-\25k\Ranboo & Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

The Blade's stance was still tense, his body prepared to fight at a moment’s notice if need be. “What’s your name?” Phil asked “My… name?” The Blade asked. “Yeah. Your name isn’t actually The Blade, right? That’s like a stage name?” Phil tried to keep his tone light. “What’s your real name?” The Blade hesitated. “No one… No one’s called me by my name in a long time.” ------- When Phil comes across Ranboo in his panic room after L'Manberg's destruction, it reminds him of when he first met Technoblade. And just like when he met Techno, Phil's first instinct is that he has to help this kid. While living together, Techno and Ranboo learn that they're much more similar than they had previously thought, and Phil learns that it's not too late for him to be a better dad.

This already feels like more of a home by H3118ENDER

T\o\violence, death\18k\Ranboo & Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

As the ashes of L'Manberg settle the conflict continues to come to life setting the stage for a new wave of blood shed. Stuck slam in the middle of past and present friends Ranboo is coming to learn that even without nations to their names feelings and feuds don't die but people, people do.

A Shadow of a Shadow by unappetizingegg

T\c\-\4k\ Ranboo & Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

There were a few beats of silence, and then- “What are your plans, now? Do you need a place to stay?”

That caught him off guard. Surely he’d heard incorrectly. Phil was offering him a home, right after he’d orchestrated the destruction of his past one? It didn’t make any sense, none of it did. Why would Phil say that?

Then he remembered, he remembered Techno stopping him in the fight. He remembered being handed his book, the question in Techno’s gaze. He swore, in that moment, Technoblade, the Technoblade, had been worried about him. He remembered that he had been told to leave, to run, to get away and preserve himself. He had spared him, he remembered that Techno had spared him.

Techno had helped him. Phil had tried to protect him, to get him away from the danger.

They were there for him.

 ---

alternatively:

Ranboo is alone. But he really isn't.

Meritocracy by oddsbodkins

G\o\-\18k\Dream & Technoblade, sbi, medieval AU

Summary:

Dream is more successful than he'd ever imagined - but there's one thing that's been bothering him. Technoblade, his biggest rival, the Acolyte of the Blood God and King of the Arena, went missing last spring, just before Dream got the chance to duel him. Without that one achievement to pave his way, all the following victories have felt cheap.

So, Dream hired some goons to dig Technoblade up and pester him into coming back to the Capitol, for one last showdown. Easy enough, right?

Interlude I: "Promises to Keep" by Ozzyyy

T\c\-\1k\part of a series\Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

These woods are lovely, dark, and deep But I have promises to keep

And miles to go before I sleep And miles to go before I sleep.

--

Techno has a plan. It's crazy. It's insane, it's actually just batshit bonkers. But if chaos cannot be enjoyed together, then what's it worth, yeah? There's a certain beauty in watching the world burn from the center of the flames. Phil intends to be there.

I Don't Want To Start A Fight (wouldn't you rather start a riot?) by KryOnBlock

T\c\violence, death\15k\Technoblade & Philza & Ranboo

Summary:

An universal ping rang out from behind him, the third and final he knew, and Phil sobbed, clutching the body tighter.

Techno didn’t move.

It always has been Technoblade and Philza, Philza and Technoblade. Take on half, and you shall never go back.

Sheltered by Lulatic

G\c\-\6k\Ranboo & Technoblade

Summary:

It was cold outside. But Techno never heard Ranboo complain.

That was the best excuse he could muster to keep him out.

Antarctic Princes 'verse by BirchWrites

T\o\-\15k\series\sbi

Summary:

Loosely-connected one shots set in an AU where the Antarctic Empire and the Dream SMP are in the same world. Ordered chronologically, but each fic can be read as a standalone thing

Summary of first part:

Oh shit. Forget arrested; Dream’s going to have to tell Wilbur that he watched Tommy get stabbed for being terminally stupid.

May we cross paths again by QueenLunaFreed

G\c\-\1k\Dream & Technoblade

Summary:

“Even if tomorrow it’s just us versus the entire server, Dream, I’m telling you right now - I have confidence.”

---

Dream couldn’t comprehend the pacing contradiction in front of him, the weakness he could clearly see, but would never comment on. Because this man has been defying Dream's expectations since they first met, because despite them not being friends and having no reason to trust each other, Dream knew that Technoblade is the only person who he’d trust to do this right. To destroy L'Manberg alongside him yet again, this time for real.

leave me your starlight by findingkairos

T\o\-\18k\Technoblade & Philza

Summary:

For you the world, Phil.

Once upon a time, Philza Minecraft is the only person who does not shy away from the bloody teen that regularly turns the tide of war.

This cements a friendship that will last wars, empires, worlds, and lifetimes.

 ---

(Featuring: Back to Back Badasses, healthy relationships, accidental deification, intentional world domination, and Phil's past coming back to haunt his best friend.)