#plz dont slit my throat

[nightfallsystem-moved]

dude if i find one more bug in my bed im going to actually bash my head into a wall so much

[zzariyo]

sidon (ask meme)

O boy

favorite thing about him:

the fact that he’s been doing that same smile thing since he was little is so wonderful im big fan

least favorite thing about them:

the fact that whenever i go to a con hoping to finally get rito or just any botw merchandise im fucking drowning in sidon

favorite line:

it’s pretty sad but i do like that moment where you catch him talking to Mipha’s statue,,, 

"I wish you were here to guide me... I miss you terribly..."

HHHOUUGGHHHHH

brOTP:

the idea of Kass and him being bros makes me.   :   )

OTP:

its not an otp as much as a funny little silly thought but the concept of Sidon and Meelo being together is absolutely lovely and delightful. in another world they would b a really good couple. dont fucking @ MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

NOTP:

OKAY I WAS GONNA ZIP MY LIPS BUT I OUGHTA BE TRANSPARENT

it’s fuckingnghg s!dl!nk but HOnestly at the end of the day i have 0 issue with it its only out of spite and its fucking fun to be petty as shit about something

like literally i’ll see a really cute or pretty s!dl!nk thing and b like “o hoho how delightful i will reblog this” and i’ll stop myself like

“wait a SECOND. I HATE THAT!!!!! that’s RIGHT!!!!!!!” and then i dont.

you can @ me about this i deserve it

random headcanon/ unpopular opinion:

most of my opinions on sidon are very very incredibly unpopular

for instance, a lot of people think of him as a kind, excitable, sweet, responsible boy to the very core that looks out for his loved ones case closed...considering that’s really all that was shown in canon

but really i feel like there would be a really dark, realistic dark, part of him that doesn’t come out very often. not anything like YANDERE or CRAZY KILLER SEXY FISH MONSTER or whatever. and not anything that makes him a fundamentally bad person. just that there’s a really horrible side to him that can easily be triggered and without being careful and aware of it he can go down the wrong path and make really bad, rash decisions if he doesn’t have any proper guidance.

i mean, he was raised as royalty so he was probably given everything he wanted, and I would like to think that because of the death of Mipha (and whatever the story is about their mother), Dorephan wasn’t always emotionally there to raise him right. Like, his father loves him more than anything, but he lost so much so it was easier to give him whatever he wanted and make him happy. And so then with his sister gone and with no mother to speak of, there is no one to properly raise him and guide him.

so, with that and with literally being a prince, Sidon isn’t used to not getting what he wants. He will keep his composure for a while, but only for so long. And since he was never told ‘no’ as he grew up, he acts out/has a tantrum/gets pissed off beyond belief. And this only gets worse and scarier as he gets older.

But really, in all honesty, there is absolutely nothing wrong with thinking of him as a genuinely pure-hearted guy that loves everyone. i’m just. like this and love to break down characters and add some depth, especially if it’s dark, and i felt like it would interestly to do that with Sidon since there is certainly room for it. and so that’s what i try to do in ehc; show his composure slowly breaking away to show this ugly, (but not evil!!!) side of him.

song i associate with them:

Shark Serenade by Vermillion Lies. Mostly cuz of what i talked about ^^^ and also cuz he. a shark

favorite picture of them:

LITERALLY-

[dr4cking]

Hello lovely - Could plz you do draco smut on the hogwarts express with breeding kink? but they keep going after he finishes 😶‍🌫️🤪

Hogwarts Express.

masterlist taglist

draco malfoy x reader | smut | anon requested.

a/n : hii bby thank you for requesting, this one is wild i admit and was kinda hard to write but i like it nonetheless 😩💞

the 9 3/4 platform are full of wizards and witches coming back from their home, hagrid already waiting and calling them to come inside the train, but he still waited as he saw the blonde haired guy still standing outside.

“malfoy, you gonna miss the train if you keep standing there!” hagrid shouted at him getting impatient by the time.

“a minute hagrid. i’m waiting for my girlfriend!” hagrid rolled his eyes at him taking a seat on the nearest bench while the train already honking at them.

finally, draco spotted his girlfriend running to him with her belongings, he quickly wrapped the girl in his arms.

“hey my love, how’s your summer?” draco asked taking her stuff in his hand helping her as both of them now entering the train.

“it was good i had so much fun with my parents! what about you?”

“it was nice i guess but it would be better if you were there with me..” y/n chuckles at her boyfriend.

“next time i promise, pinky promise!” he laughs as he opened the empty cabin and motioning y/n to go inside.

“why dont we sit with our friends, dray?” y/n asked him in confusion while draco placing her stuff in the trunk.

“i miss you too much to sit with them today, love” draco sits beside her, cupping her face in his hands as he finally gets the taste of her after being separated from summer break, y/n kissed him right back until they broke the kiss.

draco and y/n talked about how their break, random things for hours as the train still on its way to hogwarts, y/n is currently eating her snacks that she bought from the trolley lady but she stops when she watched draco swished his wand and the window covered instantly. she widen her eyes as one of draco’s hands squeezed her thigh under her skirt and rubbing small circles on it, she looks up at him who now held a lustful gaze in his eyes.

“draco.. not here.” y/n warned him but its only made his hand trailed higher, draco gives her a cheeky smirk.

“cant blame me.. you’re too hot to resist and i cant wait until we get to hogwarts i miss you too much..” draco leans into her face biting and licking her earlobe then kissing her jaw making the girl letting out soft whimpers.

“b-but what if someone comes in, draco? its too risky.”

“and thats what it made this more fun, right?” draco chuckles lowly as he took out his wand from his pocket and casted a locking and silencing spell at the door.

“you’re unbelievable” y/n laughs, her hand removing his blazer and unbuttoning his black shirt and draco does the same to her.

“i can tell you that you wanted this too. i bet you’re thinking of me while touching yourself in your room, wishing it was my fingers instead, hmm?” y/n moaned at his dirty words she hated to admit but it was true.

“use your words and answer me.” draco slapped her thighs making her gasped.

“y-yes” she stutters as he starts to rubbing her from her panties.

“yes what?”

“yes draco.. p-please touch me” y/n begged desperately at him getting more aroused at his touch.

“i’m touching you.”

“no.. you know what i mean, dray..” y/n leaned back to her seat and widen her legs for draco making him chuckles deeply.

“you’re just a needy slut, aren’t you?” y/n nodded eagerly at him, running her hands around his bare chest and abs causing him to rolled his eyes back at her simple touch.

“yes i am, please i need you” draco pulled down her panties throwing it to her side, y/n’s breath got stuck in her throat as his thumb made a contact with her clit.

a moan left her lips as he thrusted his fingers into her, she quickly put her hand over her mouth to muffle her moans making draco stop.

“dumb slut, be as loud as you can i��ve casted a muffliato.” draco put her hand off of her mouth and replacing it with his lips instead, he kissed her roughly, their tongue dances together fighting for dominance. draco won of course as y/n moan into the kisses when he inserts his fingers back into her and starts to pumping faster.

y/n’s hand going down to his clothed boner rubbing it causing draco to let out a hiss but he quickly slap her hand away.

“you dont get to touch me. dont be a bad girl or you wont get to cum” draco curls his fingers inside her and thrusting faster hitting her spot making y/n squirmed in her seat.

“draco please i’m so close..” and with that draco pulled out his fingers making y/n whining in frustration.

“not yet little slut” he pulled y/n from her seat and stood her up against the window.

draco quickly unbuckled his belt and and letting his trousers falls onto the floor, he pushed her skirt up to her waist and hooking one of her legs to his waist as he lining his cock up and down her slit.

“beg for it, slut.”

“please dray please please fuck me fill me up with y- ah- yes- oh my god!” y/n screaming out loud instantly as draco gave her no warning and pushed his cock all the way inside of her, he gives her no time to adjust as he starts to rocking his hips against her.

“fuck you’re so tight- wrapping my cock so tight.. such a good girl-” draco pounding into her harder and faster making both of them feeling heavenly. one of his hands squeezing her breast, twirling and pinching her hard nipple making y/n dug her nails deeper on his back.

draco’s thrust getting sloppier as he feels the knot tighten in his stomach, he forced his cock deeper inside her nearly brushing her cervix making y/n screaming louder.

“i’m gonna cum.. please let me cum!” y/n pleaded at him cant hold her high anymore as draco doubled up her pleasure by rubbing her clit with his fingers.

“shit- cum baby, now.” y/n came instantly with loud moan left her lips after he said that, her legs began to shake, her walls clenching and pulsing around him making his cock throbbing inside her.

“thats it- ‘m gonna fill you up baby, stuffing you full with all my hot cum, fucking hell-” draco came to a full stop as he shoots all of his cum into her, spraying his cum inside her filling her up like he promised, he ride out their high.

fuck, he was still hard.

draco made no move to pull out, he captured y/n’s lips back on his as he still rocked in and out of her snapping his hips against her making the girl moaned again.

“im not done yet with you baby, now bend over the seat” y/n obeyed getting into the position, getting all fours, draco gives her a few spanks on her ass making them printed with his hand print.

“safeword?” draco said as he lining his cock back on her cunt, their juices making it slippery and made his tip slipped into her causing y/n to winced.

“no need draco, please just fuck me again.” and with that draco slammed his entire length into her, granting her wishes, profanities left their lips.

“such a greedy girl, only for me”

“yes yes only for you, harder please” draco was surprised that y/n hasnt sensitive yet, he thrusted harder and sped up his pace at inhumanly pace, clapping sounds and moans filling the cabin.

“fuck draco!” y/n couldnt contain her scream anymore she only wanted to screaming his name while she came undone around his cock.

“holyshit- y/n!” draco grabbed her neck pulling her up to his chest as he shoots his cum for the second time inside her, y/n moaned feeling so full. draco lazily ride out their highs and pulling out as he softening. their mixed cums dripped out of her and he quickly pushed it back inside. he reached for her panties and pulling it up.

“keep it there, wanna see you walking around with my cum inside you” y/n blushes madly at his order.

they quickly redressing themselves, their bodies feels so sticky. and to their luck the train has stopped at the same time. they quickly bring their stuff before opening the door.

“merlin it smells like sex in here” theodore nott said as he passed through their cabin.

“thats because we just had sex” draco replied without hesitation making the poor guy scrunched his face in disgust.

“you guys are so gross i dont ever wanna sit there again!”

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

tagging : @dracoscum @hellounicorn @onyourgoddamnleft @whoreforgeorgeandfred @turn-to-page-394-please @malfoysbiitch @f4iryluvy @arzfia @slut4dracoo @alexthealexthealex

[pseudofaux]

hi!! plz if you dont mind could you do some doctor play with kyle from ikerev?

I COULD AND I WILL! 😍 The good doctor is always in on this blog.

Thanks so much for requesting! 🩺 I wanted to make this sexy for the doctor play but definitely keep it playful, because I really like that part of the Alice/Kyle dynamic. I hope you will see and enjoy this!

(Requests are closed, readers, but there are a lot to be filled in May and likely June, too! Feel free to follow along or just check in and enjoy as many as you like. A masterlist will go up when they are all completed.)

“You’re really compromising my professional integrity here,” he drawls.

“Good thing you aren’t held to a professional standard after ten at night. In my room.” She gives his hand a squeeze for good measure.

“...point taken.”

He still sounds strained, so she pauses and looks at his face.

“It’s okay,” Kyle assures her. “This is just... weird, outside of the clinic.”

“Is it too weird?”

“Did I say it was?”

She rolls her eyes and gives his hand a yank for good measure. “Don’t make fun of me. You said we could try.”

“I did. So,” he begins loudly, taking back his hand and using it to tap a folder she nicked from the clinic for just this reason, “I believe you mentioned some ‘enhanced sensitivities that are making everyday life more difficult’. What can you tell me about what’s going on?”

He has the exact lazy, gentle, warm tone she loves to listen to when he’s actually working. He looks so normal there in the chair beside her bed, a little lazy but not inattentive, and his hair is mussed from a long day and he’s one one leg over the other. He looks so good her feet start swinging, hanging off the edge of her mattress.

“Well, Kyle, I—”

“It’s Dr. Ash, actually,” he chimes in. He sounds bored but since he never actually corrects people he must be doing this because he’s committed to the play she asked for. She pulls her lips into her mouth so she doesn’t laugh.

“Dr. Ash,” she amends respectfully.

“I went to medical college,” he points out. “You’re not seeing a quack, here.”

“Can we get to the point?” she hisses. He does not pull his lips into his mouth, he laughs openly at her and waves her on.

“Doctor Ash,” she stresses, “I’m having a very hard time lately because— well, this is embarrassing...” and even though it was her idea, it is embarrassing. She’s not comfortable saying what she was thinking. It seemed like a really good idea all week when she was working up her nerve, but now that they are actually here, her nerve seems to have left her to do this on her own.

“Don’t worry,” Kyle drawls. “I’ve seen it all before.”

“...have you.” She can’t help glaring at him.

“Oh, right, sorry. Uh... just be honest, I’m here to help.”

“Well, it’s my chest, you see.”

Kyle cocks an eyebrow at her, more curious than seductive. If she’s honest with herself, even his curious expression is very appealing. “Are you experiencing any pain?” he asks. “How long has this been going on?”

“Ages,” she says, leaning into the drama of their little play. “And it’s not pain, exactly. More like... sensitivity, like I reported.”

He taps his chin thoughtfully with the folder. “Can you show me where on your chest, exactly?”

She nods, takes a deep breath, and cups her breasts. The way his eyes widen and shoot to hers is extremely satisfying.

“Didn’t realize you meant this,” he says under his breath.

“Well, I did,” she shoots back under hers. “This, specifically,” she says in her normal voice, and thumbs her nipples. She can’t remember the last time she was so bold, but his interest is evident so she sticks with her plan. Now they are getting somewhere!

They go back and forth a bit more, and eventually he asks her to remove her shirt. Victory bubbles like fresh fizzy lemonade in every one of her fingers as she undoes the ribbon she wears under her collar, then all the buttons. By that point her nipples actually do ache, needing his touch, used to his mouth by this point in the night. They feel vulnerable but not in a way that desires hiding. Not that she could, when each peak is so obvious through her chemise.

“I see why you’d be concerned,” Kyle says drily. She shoots him a look and he holds up his hands, one still clutching the empty folder. “Sorry,” he mouths.

“No you’re not,” she hisses.

“You want to stop, or...?”

“I want you to do it right!”

He holds up the folder again and clears his throat.

Kyle touches the stethoscope he wore into her room, slung behind his neck. “I’m going to listen to your heartbeat,” he tells her. She nods.

“You’re going to feel me touch,” he says quietly, and she’s heard those words a hundred times but never said in such a way. It makes her heartbeat start to skip, trip, run inside her ribs. Now they’re getting somewhere.

The little disc presses into her just above the lace that edges her chemise, and it is so cold she flinches. His hand comes to her arm to hold her in place. “Sorry about that,” he murmurs. He opens his mouth and expels warm air onto the spot the stethoscope chilled. “Better?”

“Yes,” she says, maybe a little too enthusiastically.

He hums quietly (that means good, she recognizes that sound as well as she knows his snores), and then presses the disc to her again, following the edge of the lace. It’s a slow, careful progression.

“Good, good, can hear your heartbeat,” he says, voice thick.

“No you can’t,” she hisses.

“Did you go to medical college?”

“You don’t even have it in your ears!”

“What? Oh— aww, to hell with this thing,” he says, chucking the stethoscope over his shoulder. It thumps forlornly against the carpet of her room, but she can’t spare it any thought because two green-gold eyes are looking right at her as he slides the right strap of her chemise off her shoulder and fishes out her breast.

“Medicine is about careful observation,” he tells her, in a voice some men use to tell their lovers significantly more romantic things. She doesn’t mention his careful stethoscope use, but he tweaks her nipple anyway. The pull immediately registers between her legs and her breathing becomes something more like panting.

He hums, frees the other breast, and tweaks that nipple, too. Her naked shoulders hunch forward in a protective measure but he doesn’t let go, so the pull becomes a sweet, sharp pain, and her whimper is plain in the air between them.

“Oh, good,” he murmurs. “I know you expressed concern, but this all seems like normal sensitivity to me.”

She’s trying to play along, but her voice is very pleading when she asks “Does it?”

Kyle nods and frowns in concentration as he gets a wider grasp, then gently pinches. “Feel that?”

It’s a good thing they are in her bedroom, because her noise of assent would definitely echo off the tiles of the clinic and is generally inappropriate in any professional setting.

He’s massaging her now, moving the captive flesh between his thumb and finger, and honestly the gentle pull feels like milking and she has to squeeze her comforter below her hands so she doesn’t swoon. “What... are you doing?” she manages to ask. Her voice is complete lust, it feels like all of her is complete lust.

“Carefully examining my patient,” he says quietly, and indeed he is looking at the tip of her breast very carefully. “Please stop distracting me, my work is very important.”

That’s what he says, but there’s some red high on his cheeks, and she’s never seen him wet his lips so often while giving a patient an exam. Nor ever massage them like this. Thank goodness.

When he starts working her other breast at the same time, she struggles to keep up the act. He’s never touched her like this before, and being half clothed while he’s all buttoned up and leaning in to slowly milk her or whatever he’s doing while she sits less and less primly on her bed... maybe they’re close enough to breaking character? That was the whole point. Should she just give it up and pull him into bed?

“You’re going to feel me touch,” he whispers, and it’s said gently but it is a declaration, not a warning. Even half-dazed, he puts the stress on just the right word to make the meaning clear: he’s going to touch her and she will feel it.

Kyle turns his hands so he can cup her breasts with his fingers. There’s another of his warm breaths, so warm it makes her nipple feel as dewy as her slit, and then he takes it in his mouth without letting go of his grip on her. His suck is so strong— or maybe she’s so sensitized— that she shrieks, the sound tiny but alarmed. He shoots her a lazy glare, then closes his eyes and says “Quiet, please,” around a mouthful of her breast before he does it again.

“Kyle,” she says in a small voice. “I—”

He sighs through his nose, the huff of his breath blowing onto her like a cloud. She feels him everywhere. “As I said, it’s ‘Doctor Ash’, actually,” he corrects as he moves to her other breast.

She repeats it with a shaky voice but the last syllable becomes a wail she keeps in at the very last minute by clamping her mouth shut as he sucks even harder on the other nipple.

He lets her fall from his mouth but doesn’t move back. Gravely, he tells her “That reaction makes me think this is a very extreme case.”

“Oh no,” she says. She wishes she could play up her concern for the sake of this game, but the words just fall out of her with even less grace than her wet nipple tumbled out of his mouth when he let her go. Only with his mouth, of course. His hands are still on her, still working her. She tells herself that’s why she can’t stop squeezing her thighs together. “What do you recommend, doctor?”

“Bed rest,” he whispers. He’s rubbing her nipple with his nose and he is so attractive she is going to die if he doesn’t touch her more.

“Oh thank goodness,” she sighs, throwing her arms around him. She can hear his muffled laugh as he lets go to slip his arms around her and use the embrace to push her back to the comforter.

“Don’t worry,” he murmurs before he puts his hands right back where they were and begins to kiss her throat. “I have a very specific treatment plan in mind.”

She moans when he finds the spot she likes, high on the left side. “Tell me more,” she begs.

But he doesn’t. He shows her instead. Thankfully, the treatment plan is very thorough.

[leafboy-the-great]

For song reccs for you I got:

Bulls in the Bronx- Pierce the Veil

IYDKMIGHTKY- Type O negative

I don’t wanna be me anymore- Type O negative

Dismantle me- The Distillers

There u go feast on my music

Bulls in the Bronx: pierce the veil is always amazing. 8/10

IDKMIGHTKY: I feel as if this song is gonna slit my throat in my sleep. 10/10

i dont wanna be me anymore : damn. 100/10

Dismantle me: this song can live in my soul plz thanks/10

[goblinshitting]

oh look Eliza the lazy ass finally made some good ass art lmao

[1800areyouslapping]

I really liked the idea of a yandere Genji having a voyeur blog dedicated completely to his little sister ❤ The best of all? Her loyal followers don't even know a thing about what's really going on, neither does she. They think is all an act or role play between the "couple"~ would you mind sharing a scenario about this with us?

If only you knew how lovely your followers think you are. All of the beautiful complements, all of the phrase, all of the heart-centric emojis that get left as comments on your photos. Maybe then you wouldn’t feel the need to fuss so much over your appearance, or perhaps you’d fuss more; who knows. 

Genji watches you through a slit in your closet doors, sitting at your vanity with a small displeased frown on your face. Hair going up and then down. Braided and unbraided. Winged eyeliner wiped off of your eye multiple times to be replaced each time with a line that is cleaner and more sharper than the last. 

Genji snaps a photo while you’ve got a bobby pin between your teeth and your hair in your hands. Brows furrowed in concentration, frustrated because a certain piece of hair refuses to cooperate. Not even dressed yet, still clad in your robe. Your shower ran five minutes too long today. You’re going to be late for your lessons at this rate. 

Then he sinks back into your closet, leaning against the wall admiring the picture, thinking up a caption. It’s not long before he’s typing:

“My gorgeous girl’s feeling insecure today. Even with worry lines she’s perfect. Give her some love, yeah?”

And… posted. 

Immediately the likes and comments start flooding in. Many of your followers who are demanding, albeit playfully, that he makes sure to lift you up, to give you assurances. It is his job, as a loving boyfriend, to make sure you don’t continue to feel insecure. 

The comments inflate his ego and his lies. Fill his false sense of ownership over you. Yes, duh, of course, it’s his job to ensure you that you’re perfect, amazing. There’s no one else who would be able to say it with nearly as much sincerity as he can. No one else would go to such great lengths to capture your candid moments like him. 

Some even joke, “Is the girl aware she’s got a whole blog dedicated to her smh”

No.

Genji practically feels giddy from all of the vindication. So giddy and enraptured in the false life he built for the two of you that he nearly misses you dropping your robe to the ground. Your bare bottom and back still a bit dewy from your morning shower. Genji goes from feeling giddy to feeling foggy and hot. Blood swelling in his cock, his breath becoming shallow.   

Suddenly the closet feels too small. Like the walls are starting to pulsate around him as you pick out your matching underwear for the day. Nothing he would consider sultry, it’s a rather cute matching set. This fog, this dizziness, has been happening to him more and more often. The impulse to make himself known, to just throw open the doors, and bring his internet life with you into reality. 

Surely you would be happy to know that so many people love you because of him… right? That so many people wait with baited breath for the next photo depicting his relationship with you to be posted. So they can gush, praise, and wish and wish that they had what you and Genji have. 

Then you bend down to put on your underwear. Even for all of the static fuzz in his brain, the way the world bends when he’s this close to your naked form, he is still able to think quick enough. Snaps photo after photo, a couple of which come out just right. A side shot where your arm blocks out the view of your breasts, your butt only exposed so much. A little racy, but not so racy that it wouldn’t fit in nicely on the blog. 

Genji quickly touches up the photo with a blur that makes the room around you go out of focus, the only thing clearly visible being you. He posts the photo with the caption: 

“If only we did not have somewhere to be ❤︎“

There’s no time to let the comments feed the hungry, obsessed beast always sitting at the forefront of his brain. Genji’s going to have to duck out, as you’re coming to your closet to finish getting dressed. 

Just as you are sliding open the doors, Genji is disappearing into a not-so-secret corridor in the wall, and closing the panel at the back. Silent, quick, you’ll never know he was there. Not that you aren’t aware the compartment is there, it used to be your favorite spot during hide-and-seek as kids.  

Now he waits. Waits in the hall just outside of your room. Listens for the sound of your door opening and the pitter patter of your feet as you run to try and be a little less late for your tutoring. When he does hear it his heart rate quickens, he waits just a little bit longer and runs after you. 

“Eh, ‘Sis! Wait up!” 

You come to a halt. Spin around, ponytail swinging wildly with the momentum. A big grin on your face. Man, that would have made a great picture.  

“Genji! Good morning!” You say cheerfully. 

Genji feigns heavily breath as if he has been running from his room to this point. When really he’s breathing clearer, getting all the oxygen he needs now that he’s close to you, fully dressed, and has had the pleasure of hearing your voice. 

“You late too?” He asks.  

“Ugh, yeah– this is the third time this week. Mrs. Yumi’s gonna be so sour with me,” you say.   

“She will get over it-” Genji leans in close, taking ‘notice’ of your eyeliner- “Your wings are killer today, ‘Sis.” 

Your face turns into a shining beam of a smile. “Oh! Thanks!” 

That’s the first time you’ve smiled today, he was the one who did that for you. Gave you a reason to be happy, to feel good. Genji can feel the dopamine flooding his brain, as it must be flooding yours. Then he gets a whiff of your perfume; soft floral blossoms and citrus, suddenly his head is spinning again.

Ignoring the lub-dubs in his ears he says, “They’re so sharp you could slit a man’s throat.” Warranting an even bigger grin, and an adorable blush.   

“Exactly as they should be!” You say enthusiastically, jumping up to give him a quick hug. He resists the urge to hang onto you. To cling to your body and bury his face in your neck. Letting you go, you turn away from him and continue on your way. “I’m sorry, I really have to go!” 

“Don’t let Mrs. Yumi guilt trip you too much!” He yells as you continue on your way. 

Giggling you absentmindedly state that that is impossible. Then you pause your progress one more time, to grant him with a gift. 

“Hey! You wanna have lunch with me later?” 

Yes. Absolutely. As if he’d ever turn down an invitation from you. It’s all he can do to keep his eyes from bulging out of his head, to keep from sounding too eager.  

“Yeah! Sounds great, I’ll text you!” 

Genji doesn’t have anywhere he needs to be. So he makes himself some breakfast and takes a seat on his balcony. Hardly touching his food as he’s obsessively scrolling through comments, looking at the notifications on the latest picture. It’s a hit with your followers, as most of your pictures are. 

An old, old follower of yours makes a suggestion: 

“U love birds ever consider making a nsfw blog 👀  just a thot plz dont hate me”

Warmth floods in his belly; brings his erection back to his attention. Yes, he has considered it. Genji’s considered it a lot. These days it’s nearly all that he can think about. Taking yours and his internet relationship to the next level, sharing every aspect of the beloved couples life. Funny how one simple comment could break down the little self-control he had, gives him confidence to put a plan into motion to do just that. 

Now that he thinks about it, the blogs one-year anniversary is coming up soon. What better way to celebrate it than to start a whole new blog. One with an explicit eighteen and over tag, and even more pictures, possibly some videos of you. 

[tumblunni]

oreshika: you know who is not the bad guy? the bad guy also oreshika: you know who is actually the secret bad guy? this sweet harmless comic relief man who has done nothing wrong

except like its eight glowing brain levels deeper cos the sweet comic relief man is also a giant obviously evil demon mask that ANYONE could have pinned for “really just possessing this dude” since the very start but then his personality was very non bad and he was all ‘hey buddie why u no smile’ to his host and like I LET MY GUARD DOWN OKAY. I LEARNED TO TRUST AGAIN.

i’m at the final battle and I am so pissed off but also HYPED?? like im relaly mad cos like RIGHT FROM HIS FIRST APPEARANCE I was like ‘dear god please don’t make onigashira the real villain, it would be so fucking obvious’ and then i just got progressively more pissed because he literally did nothing evil in the entire damn plot, he’s just evil because Evil he’s some sort of Magical Evil Mask that was Made To Be Evil and like Unquestionably Is That and no sort of interesting exploration on that plot even though he HASNT ACTED EVIL EVER UNTIL THE LITERAL LAST FIVE MINUTES

and it raises SO MANY questions cos like why was he even cooperating with Seimei then?? why didnt he fully posess seimei at any earlier point?? why didnt he kill nueko at any of the five other mandatory boss fights we had with him?? Seimei at least had an intriguing personality that gave an odd justification for his plot laziness. Cos he’s an anti-villain who weirdly sees you all as friends or a mentor/student thing, and he’s really just pretending to be evil so that you’ll kill him, cos he can’t die and desperately wants to. So it makes sense that he doesnt do any of his evil actions until you arrive, cos the whole damn point was just to taunt you into arriving. And its nicely parodied cos he literally sends you tea party invitations to his latest evil plan and gets pissed off if you miss it XD i’m so sad for seimei plz say (mei) that we adopt him afterwards i wanted to adopt onigashira afterwards back when it looked like he was the not evil one of the pair I AM STILL REALLY SALTY THAT HE’S NOT!!!! HIS DESIGN IS REALLY COOL AND CUTE!!!!! AND HE WAS A COMIC RELIEF OLD MAN DEMON DRAGON DOOD!!! i trusted u

okay but to talk about why i am also HYPE i need to go into some endgame spoilers whoopy doop!

so yeah the twist of ‘evilman is actually just being controlled by his puppet dragon thing’ was WAY OBVIOUS and i was really wishing for it to not happen but they made up for it by having ANOTHER TWIST THAT’S WAY BETTER

random description of something else from the endgame that is cool but i dont really know where to fit it into this conversation lol you actually do get to fight Final Boss Seimei here, its a cool boss rush with him and then Super Onigashira Betrayal Mode but what I really like is that its an OPTIONAL boss rush! the first time you play it you fight seimei with his freaky spider legs superform, and then nueko steals it back cos it was hers first. Can i just say again that I love a sexy mom styled heroine who’s powers are entirely around growing friggin monsters out of her arms and stuff? Seriously way to subvert that fanservice bro! (its still a bit cringey when they show the monster tattoos being drawn on her butt and boobs...) so then you go into the second fight and your health has all been healed and now one party member has a new supermove (I was really pissed cos it didnt restore your MP and TP, so I couldnt use that move!) But then if you lose and come back it actually skips the first fight and has an altered cutscene that’s like ‘oh, you’re back for round two?’ and such. MUCH preferrable to stuff like kingdom hearts where i have to watch a damn ten minute cutscene each time! Tho I do wish there was an option to redo it in boss rush mode, I guess that’s just a reward for people who can get it on the first try. I’m prepared now thooooo... :(

OKAY BACK ON TOPIC

Now for this final arc of the story we’ve been investigating the mystery of the Nameless God, some dude in the past who was apparantly super great and then got erased from history. There’s also the mystery of who exactly was Nueko’s husband and what happened to separate her from Seimei and make him turn evil, tho i mean its PRETTY OBVIOUS his dad was this mystery god lol And even though its not really very much of a twist about his identity, its still really interesting how the whole thing is handled. Him being erased from history means that none of the characters can remember his name or face, but NEITHER CAN THE PLAYER! He appears in the interfaces long before the plot actually talks about him, as a silhouette and a name smudged out by ink.

Now the actually cool twist about him is that like.. we’ve been hearing for AGES about how great he was, and how someone must have put out a hit on him or something. And him being in the interface seems like a spoiler that he’s gonna be unlockable later as a godly husband candidate for your protagonists. And even when we see npc optional boss battle gods hating on him, it’s always the jerkass gods who have some sort of reason to be biased. Or (in retrospect) they’re hating him for entirely the wrong reasons based on other people’s flawed gossip about him. “He was too kind and if he made equality then I wouldn’t be rich!” says genericman mc gee, who is probably eighty times less evil than this man

COS THATS THE TWIST

He was an evil fucker and erased himself from history with essentially an alchemy equivelant of a mad science experiment gone wrong. And what happened with Nueko and Seimei was that evilbad mc trashdad tried to use his damn four year old child as raw materials for this experiment, and she tried and failed to save him. And then she was desperate and her only option left was to kill the kid so he couldnt be tortured like that, and then killed herself too from grief. But it all went horribly wrong because she didn’t know that the reason Seimei was a candidate for this experiment is because he had immortality powers as a half human half god. So the poor kid survived watching his mom stab him and then slit her own throat, and he had no clue it was because his dad was gonna kill him anyway, so he grows up hating her and missing her and being this big ol sad mess that’s easily manipulated by a fucko father...

COS THATS ALSO THE TWIST

ONIGASHIRA WAS DADS

WHAT HOW

DADS

And like if they were gonna reveal his entire funny cute sidekick personality to be completely false then I’m glad at least his real personality was Twisty Wow and Immensely Punchable like i still feel like i could never punch a cute puppet pal but i can surely punch an abusive father pretending to be his own son’s imaginary friend for twenty years and whispering bullshit in his ear just to drive him into his own grave and like POOR SEIMEI WANTED TO DIE JUST NOT LIKE THIS NOT LIKE THIIIIIIIISSSS

i still think that ‘hey i was made to be an evil superweapon demon dragon mask thing but i became sentient and decided to be a happy hugs jokeman’ would have been a really amazing character concept too either that or ‘hey it really is a harmless normal mask and i’m just super seriously angsty seimei doing ventriloquism as a hugs jokeman character because i’m lonely as fuck and please be my friend’ either of those would have been better than this but like if this is what we get then I’m at least glad they gave me good enough reason to feel ‘GAHH I WANNA STAB HIM AND SAVE MY NEW SON’ rather than just ‘oh blah this ending ruined my fave character, and i feel nothing towards anything now’

also his boss fight is really damn fuckin coolio wow like it was a HUGE WHOA MOMENT when the fight starts and his name is blanked out and you just instantly know who he was this whole time and your mind explodes that this guy was evil and then he’s like a giant buddha-esque multi armed dude doing sutra poses with a big ol spoopy demon head and then really fun classic gameplay of ‘him summon the many hands and u has to destroy the hands to get 2 him and then they regenerate after a short amount of time’ but he’s also got super hellish simultaneous buff and debuff powers and all sorts of other nasty tricks AND IM ON THE LOWEST DIFFICULTY GEEZ and like for some reason it really stabbed my heart seeing how just one of the many hands is still human, its like seimei’s still in there and maybe he might still be alive if we defeat this guy fast enough... and then the music is SO FUCKING GOOD and it has like three remixes for all his increasingly frantic stages. like he doenst actually have boss transformations for them, its just moveset changes and stat boosts as his health drops. but also the colours of the battlefield change and you get funky remix time so its still cool!

and then I was SO CLOSE, i had him down to 5% HP before he killed me T_T such a marathon boss and I was almost there... I’m really excited to try again tho! i finally got that damn curse off my inherited weapon from the first generation, and now i’m on generation 87, and now im ready to FUCK SOME SHIT UP! also my current party is all named after types of olives because i ran out of inspiration around character number 300 i am so fucking addicted to this grindy ass game!