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đ° đ˘ đĽ đ đ đĽ đ¨ đ° đ đŤ â Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË â rafe cameron
playing: đ°đ˘đĽđđđĽđ¨đ°đđŤ by billie eilish đđËď˝ĄË â
synopsis! rafe realizes how much he cares about you when heâs willing to put everything on the line for your safety after a leaked video gets to sarah, your best friend..
paring: rafe cameron x pogue!reader
warnings: friends? with benefits , angst , panic attack (pogue!reader) , soft(ish)!rafe (heâs bipolar ik) , sexual content + unprotected sex! , lots of praise + dirty talk , some fluff , the L word , potential stalker? , mature , 18+ (minors dni!)
word count: 7.4k
notes: this is chapter two of my nobody gets me series. click the link below to read chapter one! pls lmk if youâd like to be added to my taglist! âĄ
chapter one: đ§ đ¨ đ đ¨ đ đ˛ đ đ đ đŹ đŚ đ â Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË â
â Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË ââ Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË ââ Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË ââ Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË â â Ë・â đđ Ëď˝ĄË ââ Ë・â
to say rafe was freaking out would be an understatement. it had been days since heâd last seen you, and the silence on your end was driving him to the edge of his sanity. not a single text, call, or word had come from you. it was like youâd vanished, and every minute without hearing from you only made his frustration worse.
he sat on the edge of his bed at tannyhill, replaying the night in his head for the hundredth time. every detail, every sound, every lookâit all came flooding back, leaving him questioning everything. maybe heâd been too rough. maybe heâd misread your reactions, thinking you wanted it when in reality, you were trying to get away. the thought sent a chill down his spine.
he couldnât sleep, couldnât focus. he paced his room, running his hand through his hair, biting his thumbnail anxiously as he mumbled under his breath. every scenario raced through his mind, each one worse than the last.
should he text you again? call? or maybe just drive to your house and force you to talk to him? the idea of busting down your door crossed his mind more than once, his desperation teetering on obsession. he hated feeling this out of control, hated not knowing where you stood.
but above all, he hated the thought of losing youâof you slipping through his fingers without giving him the chance to make it right.
just then, as if his prayers had been answered, your name lit up his phone. a call.
for a moment, he stared at the screen, his heart hammering in his chest before he cleared his throat and steadied his hand enough to swipe the answer button. âhey,â he said, his voice softer than usual.
the silence on your end made his stomach churn. maybe youâd called by accident? but then, faintly, he heard itâyour voice. it was barely a whisper, rough and broken, like youâd been crying for hours.
âi need to talk to you,â you said, the vulnerability in your tone cutting straight through him.
âyeah, okay. iâll come to youââ he shot up from his bed, already slipping on his shoes, when you interrupted him.
ân-no,â you stammered, your voice shaky. âjust meet me at the beach. iâll send you my pin.â
before he could respond, the line went dead, leaving him in silence once again. he stood frozen for a moment, staring at his phone, his mind racing. then, without hesitation, he grabbed his keys and headed for the door. whatever this was, he wasnât about to leave it unresolved.
you watched as the waves crashed against the shore, the rhythmic sound doing little to calm the storm inside you. with trembling hands, you adjusted your hat and pulled up the hood of your oversized sweater, trying to shield yourself from the cool night airâand maybe from your own reflection in the water. your puffy eyes told the story you didnât want to share. if it wasnât already obvious youâd been crying for days, you wouldnât have bothered with the oversized sweater as a weak disguise.
youâve been spamming sarahâs phone nonstop, sending text after text, leaving voicemails that never got a reply. it got to the point where youâre certain sheâs blocked you. the silent treatment has been unbearable, eating away at you in a way you didnât expect.
but even worse, you havenât set foot in the chateau since it all happened. you couldnât bring yourself to. if sarah was mad at youâand you knew she wasâthen the rest of them probably were too. if she told themâand she likely didâyou doubted any of them would want to see you.
the thought of facing jj, of looking into his bruised eye and knowing how you betrayed him, kept you away. you didnât deserve their forgiveness, so you didnât ask for it. instead, you sat here, waiting for rafe, the one person you werenât sure you could avoid any longer.
you feel a presence behind you, the weight of it heavy in the air, and you know without looking who it is. the sound of footsteps crunching softly against the sand confirms it before that presence settles beside you.
rafe doesnât say anything at first, but you can feel his eyes on you, studying you, trying to gauge your mood. you donât turn to face him, but out of the corner of your eye, you catch a glimpse of his expressionâhis furrowed brows, the slight downturn of his lips, and the unmistakable concern in his features.
your chest tightens. maybe he already knew about the video. maybe thatâs why he looked like thisâlike he wasnât sure what to say but felt he needed to be here.
you swallow hard, forcing the lump in your throat down, the tension stretching painfully in the quiet. âsarah knows, rafe,â you mutter finally, your voice barely above a whisper, but it feels deafening in the stillness.
you turn your head slightly to gauge his reaction, but he doesnât give you one. his expression doesnât change, his silence heavy and unreadable. of course he doesnât reactâyou shouldâve expected that.
you sigh softly, the weight of it all pressing harder against you. âthereâs, umââ your voice cracks, and you pause, biting down on your trembling lip as the tears threaten to spill. âthereâs a video of us. before we got in the truck. and someone sent it to her.â
you roll your lips into your mouth, trying desperately to hold yourself together, but it feels like youâre crumbling piece by piece. a single tear slips down your cheek, warm against your cold, rosy skin. you donât wipe it away, too consumed by the weight of everything to care.
your chest feels like itâs caving in, the weight of it pressing down so hard it steals the air from your lungs. your breaths come short and shallow, each one more desperate than the last as if no matter how hard you try, you canât pull in enough oxygen. your hands start to tremble, curling into fists at your sides, and your heart pounds so violently in your chest it feels like it might burst.
your vision starts to tunnel, the edges blurring as the crashing waves in front of you twist into an indistinguishable mess of sound and movement. your head feels light, like youâre floating and sinking at the same time, and a sharp heat spreads through your chest and throat, making it even harder to breathe.
you press your hands against your knees, trying to ground yourself, but it only makes the dizziness worse. the lump in your throat feels unbearable, choking you as tears stream uncontrollably down your face. everything feels too loud and too bright, the sound of the waves and the faint hum of rafeâs presence blending into an overwhelming cacophony.
âhey,â rafe says softly, his voice distant despite being right next to you. you barely register the warmth of his hand against your arm. âhey, look at me. breathe. just breathe.â
but you canât. your body is out of your control, your mind spiraling into a dark abyss of guilt, fear, and panic. the more you fight it, the tighter the grip becomes, until all you can do is clutch your arms around yourself, trying to hold the pieces of you together as the panic consumes you.
rafe stands abruptly, the tension in his movements evident, before crouching down right in front of you. his hand gently cups your cheek, his thumb brushing slow, soothing strokes over your skin, an anchor in the storm of your panic.
âhey, hey, hey,â he murmurs, his voice low and steady, drawing your unfocused gaze to his. his eyes lock onto yours, grounding and intent. âlook at me,â he urges, keeping his tone soft but firm.
he takes a deep inhale, exaggerating the motion so you can follow it, then exhales slowly, motioning for you to mimic him, taking your hand and putting it on his chest. âbreathe with me,â he says, his own chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm.
your attempts are shaky at first, uneven gasps that barely resemble breaths, but you follow him. inhale. exhale. over and over. relief washes over his face as your breathing starts to regulate, the shallow gasps slowly giving way to deeper, steadier pulls of air.
âthere we go,â he soothes, his thumb still tracing gentle circles on your cheek. âgood job, baby.â the nickname slips out before he can stop it, but he doesnât correct himself, too focused on calming you.
his other hand comes to rest lightly on your knee, grounding you further, his presence unwavering. âiâve got you,â he says softly, his voice steady, as if willing you to believe it.
in that moment, as rafe watched you close your eyes, your chest rising and falling steadily again, relief softening your tear-streaked face, something inside him snapped. rage surged through him like a tidal wave, sudden and uncontrollable.
and he blamed sarah.
to him, it was her fault. she had no right to get involved, no reason to make this worse. something that was meant to stay between you and himâjust you and himâwas now tearing you apart. and all because of her.
his jaw clenched, his teeth grinding together as he thought about her selfishness, her spoiled sense of righteousness. it didnât matter that she was his sister; all he could see was the way her actions had hurt you. the way she had betrayed him.
the image of you struggling to breathe, broken and panicked because of her interference, made his blood boil. it wasnât fair. it wasnât right. and it was enough to make him see red.
and then there was that damn video.
the thought of it made rafeâs fists clench at his sides. it wasnât just about the invasion of privacy; it was about youâyour exposure in such a vulnerable moment. the idea of someone lurking, watching, and recording without your knowledge made his blood run cold with anger.
he didnât care about his own reputation, not in the slightest. all he cared about was you and the way it could hurt you, the way it already had hurt you.
rafe was determined to figure out who took it. he didnât care how long it would take or what heâd have to do to get the answers. whoever it was would regret ever crossing that line. and heâd make sure of it.
rafe gently pulls you to your feet, his hands steadying you before he wraps his arms around your shoulders, drawing you into a firm, grounding hug. the warmth radiating from his body seeps into you, calming the residual tremors in your chest. his steady breathing against the top of your head is a silent reassurance that youâre okay, that heâs got you.
âyouâre good,â he murmurs softly, almost to himself, as if trying to convince you both.
after a few moments, he pulls back slightly, his hands brushing your arms as he guides you toward the passenger side of his truck. he opens the door and helps you inside, his fingers lingering as he buckles your seatbelt, the light touch against your bare thighs sending goosebumps rippling across your skin. you shiver but donât say anything, leaning back into the seat as he closes the door.
once the truck is moving, the hum of the engine fills the comfortable silence between you. you havenât said a word since the breakdown at the beach, but rafe doesnât push. he seems to understand that the quiet is what you need right now.
he pulls into a nearby gas station, the bright lights spilling across the truck as he puts it in park. âiâll be quick,â he mumbles, more to himself than you, before slipping out and heading inside.
you sit there, watching him through the window as he grabs a water bottle and lingers near the snack aisle, seemingly deliberating. for a brief moment, you feel a flicker of something you canât placeâgratitude, guilt, or maybe just relief that heâs here.
inside, rafe grabs a pack of gummy worms, deciding itâs the safest option. he figures itâs something easy, something you might actually eat since heâs convinced you havenât been eating properly these past few days. satisfied, he starts to head to the checkout when he hears itâa laugh he knows all too well, one that instantly sets him on edge.
his head snaps in the direction of the sound, and there they areâsarah and john b, standing in the same aisle he just walked out of. rafeâs jaw tightens, a flare of anger igniting in his chest. it takes everything in him not to start something right then and there.
his fists clench at his sides as he forces himself to stay composed, but the tension in his body is undeniable as he turns on his heel and strides toward her.
âi need to talk to you,â he says sharply, his voice low but firm as he approaches sarah.
sarah visibly jumps at his sudden appearance, her startled expression quickly morphing into a glare. rafe can see the way her jaw ticks, the anger bubbling just beneath the surface, mirroring his own.
she glances at john b, offering him a reassuring smile. âiâll be right back,â she says calmly, though her tone carries an edge. reluctantly, john b stays put, watching them as sarah follows rafe to the back of the store, where the beverage aisle is quieter and out of sight.
as soon as theyâre alone, rafeâs grip tightens on the gummy worms and water bottle in his hands, his knuckles turning white as he struggles for some semblance of control. his glare pierces through sarah, the tension between them thick and heavy, charged with years of unresolved resentment.
âyou had no fucking right,â he growls, his voice low and venomous, the anger in his tone bubbling just beneath the surface, threatening to spill over.
sarahâs brows knit together, her own frustration flaring as she lowers her voice to a sharp whisper. âi had no right? rafe, you had no fucking right!â she hisses, her eyes blazing with anger. âmy best friend of all people? are you serious? you couldâve literally chosen anyone else, anyone, but no, you always have to come after my happiness!â
her words hang heavy between them, cutting deeper than she intended. rafeâs jaw clenches, his entire body rigid as he stares at her, his anger matched only by the faint flicker of hurt sheâs unknowingly struck.
âthis isnât about your happiness,â he snaps back, his voice still low but laced with venom. âthis is about you sticking your nose where it doesnât belong. you had no right to drag her into this.â
sarah crosses her arms, her glare unwavering. âand you had no right to do what you did, rafe. you knew what this would do to her, to me, to all of us. but you didnât care, did you? because you never do.â
rafe steps closer, the tension between them nearly suffocating as his voice drops even lower, dripping with bitterness. âyou think i donât care? you have no idea what i feel, sarah. none. but youâyou took it too far. that video?â his grip tightens around the items in his hands, the plastic crinkling under the pressure. âdo you have any idea what that did to her? to me?â
sarahâs arms tighten around herself, but she doesnât back down. âi didnât take that video, rafe. donât pin your shit on me,â she fires back, her voice steadier now, but no less angry. âyouâre the one who dragged her into your bullshit. youâre the one who made her a target.â
âa target? iâve been protecting her!â he snarls, his composure cracking as he takes another step closer. âyou think i wanted this? for someone to spy on us, to send you a video like that? you have no idea what iâd do to keep her safe.â
sarah laughs bitterly, shaking her head. âprotecting her? from what, rafe? from you?â her words are sharp, designed to cut, and they do. âbecause thatâs what it looks like from where Iâm standing.â
rafeâs jaw ticks, his breathing heavy, as he stares her down, trying to bite back the words that threaten to spill. âyou donât get it,â he mutters, his voice thick with frustration. âyou never did. this isnât about you, sarah.â
âno, itâs about her,â she snaps, her voice rising slightly despite her attempt to keep it contained. âmy best friend, rafe. sheâs not just some girl for you to fuck around with and forget about when itâs convenient. she deserves better than thisâbetter than you.â
the words hit him harder than he expects, but he doesnât let it show. instead, he leans in closer, his tone sharp as a blade. âand you think she needs you playing savior? she doesnât, sarah. sheâs stronger than you give her credit for.â
sarahâs face softens slightly, her anger flickering into something more conflicted, but she doesnât back down. âif sheâs so strong, then why is she breaking because of you?â she whispers, her voice quieter now but no less cutting.
rafe doesnât answer immediately, his grip loosening as the weight of her words settles over him. for the first time, he looks away, his jaw tight as he swallows hard.
sarah sighs deeply, her anger giving way to something softer, though the tension in her shoulders remains. she looks down at her shoes for a moment before lifting her gaze to meet rafeâs, her eyes filled with something he doesnât expectâconcern.
âif you really care about her, rafe,â she says, her voice quieter now, less sharp but still firm, âyouâll leave her alone. youâre just going to take her down with you.â
her words cut deeper than he wants to admit, but he doesnât let it show. his jaw tightens, his eyes narrowing as he shakes his head. âyou donât know what youâre talking about,â he mutters, his voice low but defensive.
âdonât i?â sarah counters, her brows furrowing. âiâve seen it, rafe. the way you drag people into your chaos. sheâs already hurting because of youâlook at whatâs happened these past few days! she doesnât need this. she doesnât need you.â
rafe flinches at the words but quickly masks it with anger. âand what? you think walking away is going to fix everything? you think i can just leave her and pretend like nothing happened?â his voice rises slightly, frustration creeping in.
âyes,â sarah replies simply, her tone steady but sad. âbecause if you donât, sheâs going to lose herself trying to save you. and you know that, rafe. deep down, you know that.â
rafeâs hands clench into fists, his breathing heavy as her words sink in. for a moment, heâs silent, his eyes darting away as he processes what sheâs said. but instead of responding, he turns on his heel, walking away from her and toward the checkout, his mind racing with everything he doesnât want to admit might be true.
as rafe walks toward the checkout, his thoughts are a storm of anger, guilt, and something deeper he canât quite name. sarahâs words play over and over in his head, each repetition chipping away at his defenses. if you really care about her, youâll leave her alone. the weight of it feels unbearable, but he pushes it down, refusing to let it show.
he pays for the water and gummy worms quickly, his mind far from the mundane transaction. the cashierâs bored expression barely registers as he grabs the bag and heads back to the truck. the short walk feels like miles, his chest tight with a mix of emotions he canât fully unravel.
when he gets back to the truck, he opens the door and climbs in, placing the bag on the center console. youâre still in the passenger seat, curled up slightly, staring out the window at the empty gas station parking lot. the dim light casts shadows across your face, and rafeâs chest aches at the sight of you looking so small, so fragile.
âhere,â he says, his voice softer than usual as he pulls out the water and gummy worms, placing them gently in your lap. âfigured you should have something.â
you donât look at him right away, your fingers hesitating before picking up the water bottle. âthanks,â you murmur, your voice barely audible, but itâs the first thing youâve said to him since the beach. it feels like both a relief and a dagger in his chest.
rafe leans back in his seat, running a hand through his hair as silence falls between you again. he doesnât know what to say, doesnât know how to fix this. sarahâs words linger in the back of his mind like a poison, making him question everything.
finally, he glances at you, his voice quieter than youâve ever heard it. âdo you⌠do you want me to take you home?â the question hangs in the air, heavy and uncertain, as he watches you for any sign of what you want, what you need from him.
âumâmy mom and i kinda got into this fight,â you admit, your voice small, barely louder than the hum of the truckâs engine. âi really donât want to be home right now.â your fingers fumble with the cap of the water bottle before you finally twist it open, the cool liquid soothing the dryness in your throat.
rafe glances at you briefly, nodding as he shifts the truck into gear. âtannyhill it is,â he says simply, his tone steady but softer than you expected.
soon, heâs reversing out of the gas station, the hum of the tires on the road filling the silence between you. you steal a glance at him, his profile illuminated by the dim dashboard lights. his grip on the steering wheel is firm, his jaw tight, but his expression is calmâfocused, almost protective.
you sip your water quietly, the tension from earlier slowly starting to ebb away, replaced by a strange sense of relief. for all of rafeâs flaws, he always had a way of making you feel like, in the moment, nothing else could touch you.
as the truck cruises through the dark streets, you lean your head against the window, your eyes fluttering closed for a moment. the familiar scent of leather and cologne fills your senses, grounding you more than you care to admit.
you hadnât been to tannyhill in a while, the last time being a couple of weeks ago with rafe. stepping inside now, you realize it hasnât changedâit still holds that same strange sense of comfort, despite everything. the air smells faintly of cedar and something distinctly rafe, a mix of cologne and the warm musk of the house itself.
rafe walks in behind you, the sound of his shoes soft against the hardwood floor. he sets his keys down next to the coat hanger with a quiet clink, his movements uncharacteristically calm. you glance around as you step further into the house, your gaze catching the open laptop and scattered paperwork on the coffee table. clearly, heâd been in the middle of something important when you called.
you move to the outside balcony, sinking onto the couch there, the cool night air brushing against your skin. rafe follows shortly after, standing in the doorway for a moment before stepping onto the balcony.
your eyes flick back to the coffee table through the glass door, taking in the slight disarray of his work. he mustâve dropped everything the moment he heard your voice, and the thought makes your chest tighten, your heart swelling with an unfamiliar warmth.
âyou didnât have to stop what you were doing,â you say softly, glancing up at him.
he shrugs, leaning against the balcony railing, his expression unreadable but his voice steady. âitâs not important. you are.â
his words linger in the air between you, and for once, you donât overthink them. you just let yourself feel the comfort of being here, the weight of the day slowly lifting.
ârafeââ you begin, your voice soft, almost hesitant.
âyeah?â he cuts in quickly, his response sharp and immediate, like heâd been waiting on edge for you to say something. his eyes search yours, his posture tense, his mind clearly elsewhere. sarahâs words are still plaguing him, the weight of them pulling him into his thoughts.
you take a small breath, steadying yourself. âthank you,â you say, your tone even softer now. âfor helping me through that.â
his expression softens slightly, and he takes a step closer before sitting down on the small table in front of you, close enough that his knees brush yours. his focus is completely on you now, and the tension in his shoulders eases just a fraction.
âitâs happened before,â you admit quietly, your fingers fidgeting with the hem of your sweater, âbut itâs never been thatâŚâ your voice trails off, the weight of earlier still heavy in your chest.
rafe nods slowly, understanding without needing you to finish the sentence. âi know,â he says softly, his voice steady but tinged with something that sounds like regret. his gaze holds yours, unwavering. âitâs okay. youâre okay.â
his words settle over you like a blanket, grounding you in the moment. for all his rough edges, rafe had a way of being exactly what you needed when the world felt like too much. and right now, that was more than enough.
the silence stretches between you, heavy and unspoken, until rafe finally sighs, breaking it. âi saw sarah at the store,â he says, his voice low.
your gaze lifts from your fingers, which had been nervously fiddling with the hem of your sweater. sitting up straighter, you meet his eyes, searching for something in his expression. âwhat did she say?â you ask softly.
he exhales sharply, leaning forward, his elbows resting on his knees. âi just want you to know,â he begins, his voice steady but tense, âsheâs not mad at you. sheâs mad at me.â his hand clenches into a fist, his knuckles whitening as he stares down at the floor.
âsarahâŚâ he trails off, his jaw tightening at the mere thought of her. after a beat, he continues, his voice bitter. âshe thinks iâm using you to get to her.â
the words hang in the air, and for a moment, all you can do is watch him, trying to make sense of it all. âare you?â you ask, your voice quiet but firm, your gaze unwavering as you search his face.
rafeâs eyes flicker between yours, the tension in his body palpable. his jaw works for a moment, and then he finally answers, his voice steady. âno.â
the way he says itâcalm, without hesitationâmakes you believe him. but the weight of everything else still lingers, making the air between you feel thick and unsteady.
ârafe, itâs fine. really, Iâm over it,â you say softly, trying to keep your tone light, even though it feels like thereâs a weight pressing down on your chest. âif you just want to keep it casual, then weâll leave it at that. it was the agreement in the first place, right?â
his jaw tightens, his teeth grinding together as he struggles to keep his composure. casual. the word feels like a knife twisting in his gut because itâs the opposite of what he wants.
but admitting that to you? thatâs something else entirely. he almost slipped earlierânearly spilled everything in the middle of the gas station while arguing with sarah. but here, sitting across from you, the words feel too heavy, too risky.
rafe wasnât lying when he said he wanted to protect you. every instinct in him screamed to keep you away from his world, to shield you from the darkness that followed him everywhere he went.
âitâs not that simple,â he mutters finally, his voice low, as if heâs talking more to himself than to you. his fists clench again, the tension in his body radiating outward. âyou think this is about keeping it casual? itâs not. itâs about keeping you safe.â
his eyes flick to yours, and for a moment, the mask slips completely. thereâs a raw vulnerability in his expression, something heâs been trying to keep buried. âthe way i live my life⌠itâll ruin you,â he says, his voice cracking slightly. âand i canât let that happen.â
your brows knit together, a confused pout forming on your lips that almost makes him cave. âif this is about stacy thorntonââ
âitâs not about stacy,â he interrupts quickly, his tone sharp but not unkind. his hands move to his face, rubbing stressfully as he exhales deeply. âthe reason you saw me with her that day on the golf course⌠it wasnât what you think.â
you stay quiet, your gaze fixed on him as he drops his hands and meets your eyes again. âi was trying to strike a deal with her father. cameron development is his companyâs biggest competitor, and if i can get close to stacy, he wonât see me as a threat, and i could blindside him,â he explains, his voice steady but laced with frustration, as though the situation is as exhausting for him as it is for you.
his hand instinctively finds your knee, his thumb tracing gentle patterns across it, grounding himself as much as you. âi donât want anything to do with stacy, i promise,â he says, his tone softening as he looks at you, his eyes searching yours for any sign of understanding.
the sincerity in his voice, the gentle touch of his hand, and the raw honesty in his confession make it harder for you to hold onto the frustration you felt before. âthen why does it feel like youâre always pushing me away?â you whisper, your voice trembling slightly.
his eyes shut softly, as if heâs trying to gather any remaining resolve he can muster. his chest rises and falls with a heavy sigh before he speaks, his voice low and unsteady. âbecause, babyâŚâ the nickname slips from his lips so naturally, so effortlessly, it sends a flutter through your stomach despite the weight of the moment.
âif i donât push you away,â he continues, his eyes opening slowly to meet yours, âthen i have to let you in. and i canât do that to you.â his voice cracks just slightly at the end, the vulnerability slipping through despite his attempts to stay composed.
his hand tightens its grip on your knee for a moment, as if anchoring himself to you, his thumb still tracing gentle patterns. âletting you in means exposing you to all of itâeverything iâve done, everything i am. and you donât deserve that.â his voice wavers, the rawness in his tone making your chest ache.
you stare at him, your heart twisting at his words. âbut donât you see?â you whisper, leaning forward slightly, your own voice trembling. âyouâre not protecting me by shutting me out, rafe. youâre just hurting me more.â
his resolve crumbles completely, the weight of holding back proving too much. he sighs softly, his hand sliding from your knee to gently grip your chin, tilting your face toward his. his eyes search yours for a moment, as if asking for permission, before leaning in and pressing his lips to yours in a soft, tentative kiss.
itâs not like the other times. this kiss isnât rushed or heatedâitâs careful, almost fragile, like heâs afraid it might break both of you if he lingers too long. his thumb brushes your jaw as his lips move against yours, and for a moment, the rest of the world fades away.
when he pulls back slightly, his forehead rests against yours, his hand still holding your chin. his voice is barely a whisper when he speaks. âiâm sorry,â he murmurs, his breath warm against your lips. âi just⌠i donât know how else to show you.â
âshow me what?â you whisper, your voice trembling slightly as you chew on your bottom lip, trying to steady yourself, trying to keep from closing the distance between you again.
rafeâs hand lingers on your chin, his thumb gently brushing your skin as his eyes bore into yours, raw and unguarded. he swallows hard, his voice breaking slightly as he finally says the words that have been clawing at him for what feels like forever.
âthat i love you,â he murmurs, the confession hanging heavily in the air between you. his gaze doesnât falter, watching your every reaction like heâs bracing himself for whatever comes next.
your breath catches in your throat, his words hitting you harder than you ever expected. the vulnerability in his voice, the way his hand shakes ever so slightly against your skinâitâs enough to shatter any walls you had left.
âwell, i can piece it together, iâm a big girl,â you mutter, your words barely leaving your lips before you close the space between you, crashing your mouth against his without another thought.
rafe groans softly, his hands immediately finding their way into your hair, tangling in it as he pulls you closer. in one swift motion, he removes the hat from your head, tossing it aside like itâs in his way. his lips move against yours with a mixture of urgency and tenderness, his touch igniting a spark that makes your whole body feel alive.
âwhat are you doing to me, huh?â he mumbles against your lips, his voice low and gravelly, the words almost a plea.
you smile against his mouth, the smallest laugh escaping you before you pull back just enough to meet his eyes, your hands brushing lightly against his chest. âprobably the same thing youâre doing to me,â you reply softly, your gaze flickering between his lips and his eyes.
a smirk tugs at the corners of his mouth before he pulls you back in, kissing you deeply, as if trying to make up for all the moments he held himself back.
rafeâs kisses left you dizzy, every touch, every movement pulling you deeper into him. before you even realized it, you were rolling your hips against his, your body moving instinctively, chasing the heat building between you. breathy moans slipped from your lips against his, and his hands gripped your waist firmly, guiding your movements as you straddled him.
âfuck, baby,â he groans, his head falling back slightly as he leans into the couch, his gaze flicking up to meet yours. âdoing so good fâme,â he mumbles, his voice rough with pleasure.
his words send a spark through you, making your hips move more deliberately, the friction sending shivers up your spine. rafeâs eyes never leave you, dark and hooded as he watches you attempt to bounce on him, your movements unsteady as the overwhelming pleasure takes hold of you.
âthatâs it,â he murmurs, his hands sliding down to grip your hips tighter, helping you find a rhythm. âso fucking perfect.â his praise only spurs you on, the intensity building with every roll of your hips, every moan that slips from both your lips. the world around you fades away, leaving just the two of you and the heat consuming you both.
the way you were squeezing around him had rafeâs jaw ticking, his self-control hanging by a thread. every movement of your hips sent shockwaves through him, and he was tryingâreally tryingânot to lose himself and thrust into you, wanting to keep you comfortable.
but when he couldnât hold back any longer, his hands gripped your waist firmly, flipping you so your back was splayed against the couch. before you could even process the shift, he grabbed one of the nearby pillows, sliding it under your lower back to lift your hips, positioning you for a deeper angle.
âtrust me,â he murmured, his voice rough but tender, his lips brushing against your temple as he settled between your legs.
then he started moving, his pace firm and deliberate, each thrust pushing into you with an intensity that had you crying out, your moans matching the rhythm of his movements. your hands gripped his neck for support, nails digging in slightly as the new angle sent pleasure coursing through you in waves.
âfuck,â rafe groaned, his voice low and strained as he watched your body arch beneath him. âyou feel so good, babyâso fucking perfect.â his words only amplified the heat pooling in your core, your moans turning into desperate gasps as he kept up the relentless pace, the balcony echoing with the sounds of skin meeting skin and your shared breaths.
ârafe, shitâdonât stop,â you beg, your voice trembling as your legs quiver around his waist, struggling to keep hold of him as he pounds into you. every thrust sends waves of pleasure coursing through you, your body arching into his as you cling to him for support.
he groans at your words, his eyes darkening as his hand slides up your body, finding its way to your neck. his fingers curl around your throat, applying just enough pressure under your jaw to make your head spin, the sensation amplifying the overwhelming heat pooling in your core.
âyou like that, huh?â he mutters, his voice rough and dripping with control as he watches your face twist in pleasure beneath him. âlook at you, baby, taking it so well for me.â
your eyes flutter closed as the overwhelming combination of his relentless pace and the pressure on your neck sends you spiraling closer to the edge. ârafe,â you whimper, your voice trembling, the sound barely audible over the symphony of heavy breaths and skin meeting skin.
his eyes stay locked on you, drinking in the sight of your flushed cheeks, parted lips, and trembling body beneath him. his other hand moves to press firmly on your lower stomach, the added pressure making you cry out, your back arching against the couch as the sensation intensifies everything.
âfuck,â he groans, his voice gravelly as he watches your reactions, completely entranced by the way you respond to him. âyou feel that?â he mutters, his hand pressing down just a little more. âfeel how deep i am?â
you can only nod weakly, your moans turning into desperate, breathless gasps as your body tightens around him, squeezing with every thrust. rafeâs jaw clenches, his own composure fraying as he drives you both closer and closer to the edge, his pace never faltering.
âcome on, pretty girl,â he murmurs through gritted teeth, his tone raw and commanding. âcum for me. iâve got you.â
his words are the final push, and your body shudders as the release crashes over you. your walls convulse around his cock, pulling a deep, guttural moan from his throat. the intensity has your head spinning, and your moans dissolve into gasps as he keeps thrusting, prolonging your high even as the overstimulation starts to set in.
rafeâs hand slips from your neck, his head dropping to rest beside yours, his breath hot against your skin. his pace falters as he feels his own release building rapidly. when your cunt squeezes him tightly on a particularly deep thrust, it sends him over the edge.
âfuck,â he groans, his hips stuttering as he spills inside of you, filling you completely. his grip on your hips tightens as he rides out the waves of his orgasm, his body trembling slightly against yours.
the room falls into a heavy silence, the only sounds the mingling of your ragged breaths and the faint hum of the crickets outside. rafe stays still for a moment, his forehead pressed against your shoulder, grounding himself before slowly pulling out to look at you, his eyes soft but unreadable.
âiâm sorry,â he murmurs, his voice soft, almost hesitant. âi didnât mean to be rough.â his eyes scan your face intently, searching for any trace of discomfort or regret.
you let out a soft laugh, reaching up to pull his face down to yours, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. his shoulders relax, and he smiles against your mouth, the tension in his body melting away.
when you pull back, the wet sound of the kiss echoes softly in the quiet night, and a playful smirk tugs at your lips. âyouâre so cute,â you tease, your voice light and full of warmth.
for the first time, you see his cheeks flush a faint shade of pink, and the sight makes you erupt into a fit of laughter. rafe huffs softly, shaking his head, but thereâs a shy grin tugging at his lips that he canât hide.
âi love you, rafe,â you say suddenly, the words falling from your lips with ease, no hesitation or doubt.
his eyes widen slightly, his expression softening as he looks at you. for a moment, heâs silent, his hand brushing against your cheek. âi love you,â he whispers, his voice rough but steady, his gaze holding yours as if to make sure you know just how much he means it.
âweâre gonna be okay,â you whisper softly, your hand coming up to caress his cheek. your thumb brushes over his skin in slow, soothing strokes, your eyes locked on his.
âyeah,â rafe murmurs, his voice dark and full of resolve, âafter i kill the person who recorded you.â
your hand stills for a moment, his words making your stomach twist. you can see the tension in his jaw, the way his eyes darken at the thought, his anger simmering just beneath the surface.
ârafe,â you say softly, leaning closer to him, your tone a mixture of caution and reassurance. âthatâs not how we should handle this. i just⌠i just want it to go away. i donât want you to make it worse.â
his eyes flicker back to yours, softening slightly, though the fire in them doesnât fully fade. âno one gets to do that to you,â he mutters, his hand coming up to cover yours on his cheek. âno one gets to hurt you and get away with it.â
you sigh, leaning your forehead against his. âweâll figure it out. together. just⌠donât do anything stupid, okay?â
he doesnât answer right away, the weight of your words hanging between you. but after a moment, he nods reluctantly, his hand tightening around yours. âokay,â he finally says, his voice calm, though the tension in his tone betrays him. itâs clear heâs only agreeing to keep you at ease.
later, once youâve fallen into a deep, peaceful sleep, rafe gently scoops you up, careful not to wake you. he carries you to his bed, tucking you under the soft duvet. his gaze lingers on your face for a moment, his expression softening as he brushes a stray strand of hair from your cheek. with a quiet sigh, he turns and closes the door behind him.
but thereâs no rest for him tonight. he stalks to his office, the air around him heavy with purpose. dropping into his chair, he powers up his laptop, his jaw set as he begins sending emails and messages.
personal investigators, tech-savvy acquaintances, and anyone else who might help him track down the person responsible for the videoâyouâre not just a priority to him; youâre the priority.
each keystroke is filled with a quiet rage, his determination growing with every email sent. rafe wonât rest, wonât stop, until he figures out who did this to youâand makes sure they regret it.
Š aerialmirrorss
taglist!: @loren8818181 @cherubcameron @shookyungsoo @waywarddiplomatfarmmonger-blog @furiouscopshepherduniversity @chenslucy @superswaggycooch @ggyuslovie @mileyraes @tincanhat @pinklleemonade @stylestarkey @percysley @rrosiitas @ipromiseidk @faephoria
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Hello I know your requests are closed rn but when theyâre open I was wondering if you can do reader doing the trend when she tells enhypen that she canât pay rent this month (lmk if you donât know the trend Iâll link it!)
i canât pay the rent âšË. âĄ
pranking enha hyung line by telling them you can't pay the rent for the month
warnings: profanity, kissing, teasing/pranks, consensual touching, 18+ genre: fluff⌠just fluff idek LOL notes: OKAY I SWEAR NOWTHIS IS MY LAST REQUEST IM DOING TIL NEXT YEAR LOL yall keep sending good ones and i dont wanna make you guys wait but PLS save the requests for next year, i promise i will do them all hehe anyways thank you for requesting!! i thought this was so funny because my sister did this on her husband recently and he was so dramatic about it, telling her that they had to sell her car LOL anyways enjoy and as per usual⌠not proofread lmao
husband!heeseung âËĘÉ â wc: 484
â you thought this prank was hilarious, especially because it seems like the peopleâs reactions were always so dramatic and you knew heeseungâs would be similar, if not funnier. heeseung was going to be arriving home from work anytime soon so you sat at your dinner table waiting for him to walk through your front door.Â
in just a few minutes, you could hear his keys enter the lock and turn the doorknob. heeseung was very hardworking and as much as you fought him on the fact that you were okay also working, he wasnât going to let his wife do another day of corporate work if he had anything to say.Â
the year before you two got married, heeseung received a huge promotion, one that allowed him to take care of the two of you without you having to ever lift a finger ever again. you were grateful for him and you did your best to be a good wife even if heeseung was okay coming home to ramyeon and cuddling in bed all day.Â
âhi, my love. how are you?â he says, throwing his shoes off and making his way over to you. he quickly presses a kiss on your temple and you release a pent up sigh to make your distress believable. âwhatâs wrong?â heeseung asks, squatting down so that he could be more eye level.Â
âhee⌠promise you wonât be mad at me?â you say and he nods at you, slightly pouting and looking at you with his big doe eyes. he was unsure of where this was going and the contrast to your usual bubbly personality was a bit worrying to him.Â
âi donât think i can pay the rent this monthâŚâ you say, jutting out your bottom lip with a slight quiver. heeseung looks like heâs just heard the saddest thing ever, like you just confessed the utmost heartbreaking statement. âbaby, that's okay! please donât worry? weâll make it workâŚâ heeseung says, pulling you intoa hug anf rubbing your back softly. you accept his hug but canât stop yourself from bursting out into laughter. heeseung suddenly pulls you away, holding your shoulders and looking at you with a suspicious expression, his left eyebrow raised as he stares at you.Â
âbabe? why are you laughing! we canât pay rent and youâre laughingâ waitâŚâ heeseung begins to say and you realize that heâs caught on. âyou donât even pay the rent! i do!â heeseung says, shooting up straight and posing with his hands on his hips with a scolding face. âsorry hee!! i had to prank you because your reaction is too cute!!â you respond and he smirks with a chuckle, falling into your arms with a hug. âyouâre lucky i love you!â heeseung says before the two of you share a kiss.Â
ânow⌠whereâs my ramyeon!â he says, picking you up bridal style and walking over to the kitchen.
husband!jongseong âËĘÉ â wc: 663
â everything about jay just screamed gentleman. he always opens doors for you, when it rains he carries the umbrella predominantly on your side more than his, he keeps you on the side furthest from the street when walking on the sidewalk, he showers you in love and compliments, and never lets you forget how much he loves you.Â
he respected your wishes when you said that after getting married you no longer wanted to work, in fact, he encouraged it. he had wanted you to stop working for a while now because of how shitty your boss was but you ultimately waited until you were married to do so. he wanted you to stay home and work on your dream home, encouraging you to use his card for whatever you needed so that you could make the house you two got together, the one of your dreams.Â
so when jay was at work, you were at home doing projects to do just that; make this house your dream home that you and jay would spend the rest of your lives together in. you were taking a break from gardening in the backyard when you came across the tiktok and because you knew that jay was weak to your pranks, it was going to be easy to pull one over on him.Â
you finish doing the rest of your garden for the day just as jay was coming home from work. you greet him at the front door, sliding your gloves off and giving him a kiss on the cheek instead of a hug so that you wouldnât get his clothes dirty since yours was slightly covered in dirt.Â
âhi baby, can we talk?â you ask and the atmosphere instantly shifts as you grab him by his hand to the kitchen. you pour him a glass of water as heâs taking a seat at your kitchen counter, eyes fixed on you as you walk over to him. âis everything okay, my love?â he asks and you pause for a second as you try to bite back a laugh.Â
âi donât know how to tell you this but i canât pay our mortage this monthâŚâ you confess and he looks at you with furrowed brows. âwhat mortage?â he ask and you tell him the mortage for the house and his eyebrows remain furrowed. âdid you buy a new house??â he ask and you couldnât help but break character. âwhy are you laughing?? whatâs going on??â he asks, even more confused than before and you explain to him that it was a prank you saw but he wasnât able to move on from your statement, still asking if you had bought another house that he hadnât known about. âwait so is there another house? do you pay the mortage for that house?â he asks as you try to catch your breath from laughing so much.Â
âcan you be serious? i have no idea whatâs going on! do you need me to pay the mortage on this house? itâs okay if you do, you know iâll help you with anything.â jay adds, proving yet again how kind and generous he was.Â
âbaby, itâs a joke! thereâs no other house.â you answer in between laughs and his eyes narrow at you after finally realizing what you were saying while laughing.Â
âwow, iâm going to need to learn how to stop falling for your pranks. whatâs next, youâre going to bring home a bunch of puppies?â and when your eyes widen at his response, he pulls you into a hug while shaking his head; âno, donât even think about it!â he says, pulling you towards the bathroom.Â
âbutâ nope! we are not getting a puppy!â jay says cutting you off. you look at him with a pout and all he can do is place a soft kiss onto your lips. âokay, fine. iâll think about it.â he says and you cheer knowing deep down jay wanted a puppy too.Â
boyfriend!jaeyun âËĘÉ â wc: 733
â you and jake have just moved into your first apartment together after graduating from college. it was nothing crazy, just a humble 2 bedroom apartment and although you wouldâve settled with 1 bedroom, jake insisted on getting two so that you could have a dedicated space for your art. jake definitely made more than you and although it made you a bit insecure that he was always taking care of the finances, he reassures you that he wouldnât want it any other way.
often telling you that heâs happy to do it if it means you could put all your focus in your passion for your art. he even goes as far as having your art supplies on a refill cycle because he knows how fast you go through them and he doesnât want you to ever run out so he has them delivered just in time as youâre about to run out of something whether it be a canvas, tools, or a certain color of paint. jake was loving like that.Â
willing to spend what he needed, no matter the price, just so that he can make sure that you have everything you needed because he was your number one supporter.Â
you were scrolling on tiktok, procrastinating on a piece, when you scrolled into the trend and it seems after seeing that first video led your algorithm to show you similar videos 8 more times before you decided that you would try and prank jake. you often tried to prank jake because his reactions were always cute and dramatic but you could tell whenever he was able to catch on so for this one, you prepared yourself. going over a small script in your head about how you would say it and what responses you would have for whatever jake could possibly say in return.Â
so, when jake got back from work you walked out of your little art studio and welcomed him home with a hug and kiss on the lips. âhi, pretty. how was your day?â he asks and when you tell him that you were stressed and a bit anxious, he immediately drops his work bag and holds you closer. âwhatâs wrong?â he asks and you slowly you pull yourself out of his grip so you could look at himâ bad idea because his eyes seemed to carry so much love and adoration for you in them that you could get lost in them.Â
âyn?â he asks and you shake yourself out of the trance of looking into his doe eyes.Â
âjake, i donât think i can pay the rent this month⌠baby iâm so sorry!â you respond, throwing yourself back into his arms and burying your face into his chest to show him just how bad you felt and you could feel jake hesitantly put his hand on your back.Â
âpay the rent?â he asks and you nod your head against his chest. âmy love, no offense but i pay the rent not you.â jake says and when you look up at him his head is slightly tilted to the side with a furrowed gaze.Â
âwe all know i make the big bucks around here, baby!â jake says proudly and although it didnât offend you at all, you pretend to be hurt by softly hitting him on the chest and pouting.Â
âhey!â you yell while crossing your arms.Â
âitâs true!â he says, pulling you back into his arms while rocking the two of you side to side. âwhat are you even talking about? i thought we agreed that i would cover our rent so you could focus on getting your art exhibit together?â he asks and you couldnât even prolong the joke anymore because he was being too sweet.Â
âyeah, i know⌠it was just a stupid prank i saw on tiktok.â you confessed and jake laughs at you endearly. âaww⌠not your best one babe.â he says and this time you hit him again because he was teasing you. he let out a small âowwâ even though it didnât actually hurt.Â
âcome on! iâm just playing!â he says, now he was looking at you with a pout and your scowl transforms into a smile. the two of you shared a tender kiss before preparing dinner. he was your hard working and caring boyfriend and you were his âlittle picasso if picasso was sexyâ; his words not yours.Â
boyfriend!sunghoon âËĘÉ â wc: 835
â sunghoon, although usually very quiet, was very mischieveious and silly when the two of you were alone. he often played harmless pranks on you like hiding and waiting behind corners and jumping out when you got close, placing fake plastic bugs in unsuspecting spots for you to find, or just randomly having an outburst of energy and screaming that would startle you.Â
and although you would tell him that you hated being scared or surprised, you secretly loved this goofy side of him because it brings out the biggest smile on his face whenever he sees your reactions. even when you do get scared, which is almost all the time, he makes it up to you by cuddling up close to you and whispering loving things into your ear until the two of you fall asleep.Â
so, when your best friend sent you the tiktok and said you should get revenge on sunghoon for scaring you just the day before, you didnât hesitate to dwelve into the tiktok trend to find inspiration on how you could really sell the story and try to prank sunghoon the way he pranks you.Â
sunghoon would be getting home from work soon, he was a part of the IT team of a large scale company and you loved how smart he was, his cute face was just a bonus. when he got the job and moved the two of you to a bigger condo closer to his work, the two of you agreed that he would take care of the rent if you took care of the smaller finances like groceries and esstentials.Â
at first you were a bit reluctant because you didnât want it to come off like he was taking care of everything but sunghoon soothed your worries and told you that if he were to ever let you take care of the rent, his parents would be highly disappointed in him for letting his lady do that. as time passed, you slowly became comfortable with sunghoonâs job and how it did provide more than enough for the two of you. you didnât really work, you often would help out at your familyâs floral shop but it wasnât anything to sunghoonâs big tech job; something youâre very grateful for⌠and of course, him.Â
âhoney, iâm home!â sunghoon announces as he enters your shared condo and you stay in place, slightly hiding in the blanket so it looked like you had been having a gloomy day instead of running outside to greet him like you usually do.Â
sunghoon quickly makes his way to your shared bedroom when you donât come out to greet him and he finds you on the bed, in a fetal position and hiding under the big fluffy white blanket. âhoney, are you ok? you look sadâŚâ sunghoon says softly and his tone of voice tugs at your heartstrings, almost making you back out of the prank.Â
you mumbled something but because you were hiding under the blanket, he couldnât hear you so he gently pulls the blanket off to reveal you, now hiding shyly behind your hands.Â
âwhatâs wrong?â he says, grabbing your hands and placing them in his, gently rubbing circles on your knuckles with his thumbs.Â
âhoon⌠iâm so sorry but i canât pay the rent this month.â you say, finally making eye contact with him, giving him sad puppy eyes and when sunghoonâs blank face doesnât change for a moment except for a few blinks, you start to believe that youâve totally convinced him⌠wrong.Â
âbaby⌠iâm gonna hold you hand when i say thisâ youâre broke and youâve never paid the rent a day in your cute little life.â he says, flashing you his cheeky smile that showed his fang like canine teeth. your jaw drops in shock at his response, prompting you to shout an empty âi hate youâ at him as you grab the blanket and return to hiding underneath it.Â
ânoo, you looove me!â sunghoon says, grabbing the blanket once again to reveal a pouty version of you.Â
âi buy you those creepy furry thingies you like, i buy you all your favorite snacks, and i pay for this lovely condo so you can have a beautiful home.â sunghoon says, getting closer with each word and finally placing a kiss on your lips.Â
âhey! the labubus are not creepyâŚâ you mutter and the both of you look over to your vanity where there sat a pink labubu.Â
âokay, yeah theyâre kinda creepyâ but i was trying to prank you because you always prank me but i guess it didnât work.â you confess and he pats your head, brushing some of your hair out of your face.Â
âdonât worry baby, your cuteness makes up for your bad pranks.â he says with a laugh before lunging out of bed, just in time as you try to lunge at him; starting a cat and mouse chase around your condo until one of you, you 99% of the time, gets tired.Â
copyright 2024 - present Š hoonieyun all rights reserved all writing here is fiction & not in any association with characters mentioned. if you enjoyed reading this please consider reblogging and following <3
#kiki diaries#enhypen#en-diaries#kiki mail#kiki requests#kpop#kpop au#kpop fic#kpop fanfic#kpop fanfiction#enha#fanfiction#enhypen au#enhypen x reader#enhypen scenarios#enhypen imagines#enhypen fluff#lee heeseung#heeseung x reader#park jongseong#jay x reader#sim jaeyun#jake x reader#park sunghoon#sunghoon x reader
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Close to me | Hector Fort x Reader
pairing . . . hector fort x gf!reader
summary . . . When someone attacks you while you're out with Hector, he doesn't think twice about defending you
request . . . yes!! based on this request!
word count . . . 1.2k+
warnings . . . none!
faceclaim . . . N/A
alexavia yaps . . . this legit might be one of my fav fics ive ever written. anon ilysm pls dont stop with these amazing ideas
taglist . . . @barcapix ,, @f1lover55 ,, @ilovebarcaaa ,, @ann6ella ,, @notm4d1 ,, @httpsdana (lmk if you want to join the taglist!)
. . . The streets outside the venue had become a catastrophic warzone of flashing cameras, pushing bodies, and shouting voices. The crowd surged like a tidal wave, making it nearly impossible to move.
Hectorâs hand had a firm grip on yours, his fingers wrapped protectively around yours as he navigated through the swarm.
"Stay close to me," he muttered, his voice rough but steady. He pulled you tighter to his side, his broad shoulders blocking some of the relentless paparazzi who pushed in closer with every step.
The questions and shouts came fast, punctuated by the endless bursts of camera flashes.
"Hector! Look this way!"
"Whoâs the girl? Is this serious?"
"Over here! Are you engaged?"
You flinched at the invasive questions, ducking slightly as someone thrust a microphone too close for comfort. Hector noticed immediately.
His hand slid from yours to your waist, his body shifting in front of yours like a shield. His dark eyes burned with irritation, his jaw clenched so tightly it couldâve cracked under the pressure.
"Sheâs not answering any questions," he snapped, his voice like a blade cutting through the noise. "Leave her alone!"
The crowd only grew more aggressive, sensing the tension as an opportunity to stir more drama. They surged closer, the air thick with shouts and shoves. And then, just as you thought it couldnât get worse, you felt it; a hand grabbing your arm, pulling you back with startling force.
You gasped, stumbling as your balance wavered. The touch wasnât rough, but it was unwelcome and jarring, panic instantly flaring in your chest.
"Hey! Let me go!" you cried out, struggling to twist free.
Hectorâs reaction was immediate, instinctual, and furious. He whipped around, his eyes locking onto the man who had grabbed you. In an instant, the calm, collected Hector you knew was gone. Replaced by someone seething with protective rage.
"Get your hands off her!" he yelled, his voice louder and sharper than youâd ever heard. He stepped forward, his body bristling with barely contained anger.
The man raised his hands defensively, mumbling something about 'just trying to get her attention,' but Hector wasnât hearing any of it.
"You think thatâs okay?" Hector said roughly, his tone dark, each word laced with venom. He took another step closer, his fists clenched tightly at his sides. "Touch her again, and I swear-"
"Hector!" one of his teammates called out, suddenly appearing by his side. "Hey, hey, calm down."
But Hector wasnât calm. His eyes stayed locked on the man as though daring him to make another move. His chest heaved with the effort to restrain himself, but his fists remained balled, ready to strike if provoked.
"Donât touch her!" Hector shouted again, his voice cutting through the chaos. He gestured toward you, his anger protective rather than violent. "Sheâs not a zoo animal for you to do this, and you have no right to lay a hand on her!"
His teammates rushed forward then, one of them gripping his arm while another stepped in front of him, trying to break his line of sight to the man. "Hector, come on," one of them urged. "Not here. Let it go."
"Let it go?" Hector snapped, his voice incredulous. "He grabbed her!"
The teammate tightened his grip on Hectorâs arm, pulling him back slightly. "I know, but youâve got cameras everywhere. Donât give them more to work with. Letâs go."
"Hector, please," you managed to call out, your voice shaky and strained.
Hearing your voice snapped him out of his anger like a bucket of cold water. He turned to look at you, and his expression immediately softened, concern overtaking the fury. But the chaos didnât relent.
Security was already stepping in to move you both, and in the confusion, Hectorâs teammates began pulling him toward the side entrance while another ushered you in a different direction.
"No, wait- sheâs with me!" Hector protested, his voice rising in panic as he realized they were separating you.
"Itâs just for a second!" one of his teammates reassured him, though Hectorâs anxious expression didnât ease.
Your heart sank as you lost sight of him, the crowd closing in again despite the security barrier. The noise, the flashes, and the sheer weight of the moment were too much.
By the time you were inside, your legs were shaking, and your chest felt tight. You found yourself in a quiet corner of the building, but the calm of the space did little to ease your nerves.
Tears welled in your eyes as you scanned the room, desperately searching for Hector. You didnât care about the cameras or the chaos outside. You just needed him.
The minutes stretched unbearably long, but then, finally, you saw him. Hector came rushing through the door, his eyes scanning the room with a panicked focus. The moment he spotted you, he crossed the space in seconds, his long strides urgent and hurried.
"Amor," he breathed, his voice cracking slightly as he reached you. He cupped your face with both hands, his thumbs brushing away the tears that had spilled over. "Are you okay? Did anyone hurt you?"
You shook your head, but your lip trembled. "Iâm fine. I justâŚI was so scared, Hector."
His arms were around you in an instant, pulling you into his chest. "Iâm so sorry," he murmured into your hair, his voice thick with guilt. "I shouldâve stayed closer. I shouldâve kept you with me."
You clung to him tightly, the fabric of his shirt bunched in your fists. "Itâs not your fault. You were protecting me. You always do."
He pulled back just enough to look at you, his dark eyes filled with regret and something deeper, an unspoken promise. "I swear to you, Iâll never let anything like that happen again. I donât care if I have to fight through a thousand crowds; Iâll protect you, always."
His teammates had followed him inside, lingering a few steps away, their expressions a mix of relief and curiosity. The entire interaction was being filmed by someone nearby, but neither of you noticed. All that mattered was him.
"Youâre all I care about," Hector continued, his voice low but steady. "Nothing else matters. Not the cameras, not the headlines. Just you."
You nodded, your hands still gripping his shirt as though letting go might cause the world to collapse. "I just want to go home," you whispered.
He kissed your forehead gently, his lips lingering as he whispered, "Weâll go. Right now. Iâve got you."
He kept his arm securely around you as he led you toward a private exit, the noise of the outside world fading with each step.
But even as the chaos diminished, the cameras had already captured everything; the protective fury in Hectorâs eyes, the way he held you like you were his entire world, and the soft reassurances that followed.
By morning, the internet would be flooded with clips and photos, fans and media alike praising the way he protected you so fiercely. 'Boyfriend of the Year' some would call him. Others would gush over how deeply he cared, how obvious his love for you was.
But in that moment, as the two of you slipped into the quiet sanctuary of his car, none of it mattered. Hector held your hand tightly, his thumb brushing soothing circles against your skin, and whispered, "Iâm never letting you go again. Youâre mine to protect, always."
And for the first time that night, you felt safe.
#alexavia writes đ#alexavia yaps đ#x reader#fic#fanfic#oneshot#x reader oneshot#football#la liga#fc barcelona#hector fort#hector fort oneshot#hector fort x you#hector fort x y/n#hector fort fic#hector fort fanfic#x y/n#x you#x reader fic#football x reader#fort x reader#barca#barça#barcelona x reader#barcelona#angst#hector fort x reader#hĂŠctor fort#hĂŠctor fort x reader#hĂŠctor fort x you
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An idea popped into my head that I feel you would write very well!
Rafe x virgin!reader. They are having a pretty heavy make out sesh, he slips his hand into her pants and then she just blurts it out? Like, "I'm a virgin," and she's like terrified. But rafe doesn't mind at all.
(also, is the 𪊠taken.)
oh my goodness!! Iâm obsessed with this. no it is not taken omg welcome to the club!!!!!!!!!! ty so much for requesting đđđđ
your night with rafe had gone as perfect as any night could have, dinner by the beach, watching the sun go down while you ate dessert, and then heading back to tannyhill with him for the night, like you always did.
your nights with rafe always ended the same day, crawling into bed wearing one of his big shirts and then making out until you were soaking through your panties and rafe was hard beneath you. you're sure that rafe might have guessed you're a virgin by now, from the way everything he does is so new to your body, reacting primally to every touch. the two of you fall asleep like that, and you feel tingly from your head to your toes, waiting for rafe to say something about going further.
you're sure he would. there's no doubt in your mind that he's ready to, and he's probably done this with a million girls before you-a thought that makes you want to cry, but you put that aside. you're rafe's now, and you know that giving him your virginity is part of the deal. you're not sure just when that'll be, since he has you in your panties nearly every night.
maybe it'd be tonight. when the two of you get back to his room, you head for his dresser immediately to pull out a shirt, but rafe pushes you against the door. he leans down into a deep kiss, and you let it progress, hands snaking into his hair while he holds your waist tightly, his own hands running up and down the soft material of your sundress.
it's a little uncomfortable against the door like this, but rafe eases you up immediately, your legs wrapping around him while he pins you in place. you don't mean to start moving your hips, grinding down against him, it's just instinct, chasing that toe-curling feeling that you haven't been able to feel with rafe yet. his hands snake further down to the hem of your dress, and then slide underneath the material to the smooth skin of your legs.
rafe's hands keep traveling, gripping your thighs while he keeps you locked in a kiss that has you feeling dizzy, would have your knees weak if he wasn't holding you up. his tongue pokes into your mouth, and you moan around it, not even wanting to pull away to breathe.
you have to, though. rafe's hands are at the waistband of your panties, and just as he starts to grope, finding where he can yank them down so he can finally do what he wants to you, you pull away, hands resting flat on his chest.
he likes you like this--hair disheveled, lips red and swollen, the strap of your dress hanging off your shoulder. he leans in, pressing a kiss to your shoulder and then your collar, then up your neck.
"rafe," you whine, but it's easy to let him keep going. "we should stop-"
his eyes dart up to meet yours, pulling his face away from your neck.
"why would i do that, hm?" he kisses you again, but you turn your head away. "finally got you where i want you."
"i-well, i'm a virgin, rafe." it falls out of your mouth, even though you've spent countless hours thinking about the best way to tell him. you've thought everything through, how to say it, how to reply based on his response, how to deal with the embarrassment you're sure to feel.
"yeah?" he questions, pulling away to look at you in the eyes. still pushed against the wall, you can feel his hard dick pressed against you. the two of you don't move an inch, besides for the nodding of your head to answer his question.
"so, no one else has ever touched you where m'touching you?"
you shake your head.
"and no one's ever seen you like this?"
you shake again, feeling your eyes get watery.
"i'm sorry-"
"why're you saying sorry? told you to stop doin' that."
"because... because it's embarrassing."
"says who? hm?"
"says everyone. right?"
"no, kid. not me. you want me to stop?" your body melts into his grip. you shake your head again. "good girl. c'mon, get on the bed. not taking your virginity against this door."
#THIS WAS SOO FUN!!! <333#pls come again!!!! lmk if you liked it???#đŽ asks#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#𪊠anon
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regarding: colour me in â HMMMMM okay pls talk to me about this đ¨đ¤
#you guys okay with a 28/29k chapter?#it's looking like it sigh#i know you all love big chapters a lot but i always get worried it might be way too much!!#and that ppl might not read if it gets too long/lose interest/not come back to it since it takes time?#but idk.. do i post it at once without splitting? or removing anything?#like every scene is so important and cmi11-core and i promise im working hard on it all đđźđđź#and i would love for you all to read it bc cmi11 is so important and my entire heart is in it andddddd 𼺠would love for you to love it!#but oh god i never shut up fsjkhfksjajfs#pls lmk :') if no one's around i'll ask again in a day or two <3#fic: colour me in
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uhh. uhhhhh
#realistically i knw that if i went thru with making animatics for all of these songs I think my hand would fall off BUT. i have brainrot#half of these songs are either here bc of the vibe or because i listened to the lyrics and read analyses and put 2 much effort than i had t#ALSO LISTEN. LISTEN BODYBAG IS EXACTLY EVERYTHING I IMAGINE WHENEVER I THINK OF WUKONG AND MACAQUES RELATIONSHIP OK#two birds and baby hotline is also kind of self explanatory. although most of the jack stauber songs are mostly for vibe#bitter water is a very specific flavor of pining / unhealthy outlook. kind of has like an insatiable vibe to it but idk how to name it#i want soap to be a healing song but maybe im just being optimistic. im here for the vibes although i feel like if swk and macaque were#actually to make up i think they would go into it kicking and screaming. and im frustrated because i cant find a song to match that#except maybe bodybag which AGAIN. THEY ARE SO FUCKING STUPID THATS HOW THEYRE GONNA HEALL FLYING BARK PLS#what if it doesnt end well also feels like a doomed narrative to me. like if you think about it from how their relationship might have st#started (and im probably taking from how everyone romanticizes their relationship as something really innocent or sweet at the start which#i am also not immune to that). but knowing them it is also a very good possibility thats not the case at all. what it is i dont know#primadonna also strikes me as a swk song but like msotly because he serves cunt. on that note I like to imagine rose colored boy as swk to#MK.BECAUSEEE i love how MK brings out the best in people AND AND AND!! 5000 year old immortal who has seen some shit come on people 'and i#have taken my glasses off' COME ON LOOK ATIT. you could also argue that could be macaque to MK and it would make sense#Spotify#Lego Monkie kid#lmk#yapping#playlist#monkie kid
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proship ppl don't always like the shit you mentioned. You meant comship lol.
This is the only thing I'm ever going to answer or say about any of this subject on here. This blog is literally just a very silly and self indulgent space where I'm having fun, and I despise this subject in its entirety. The only reason I am answering this is to have something to point to in case it ever comes up again so I don't have to say anything further.
I could not give less of a hoot about the label somebody uses. If you think fiction has no affect on reality, and/or if you think creating (in any form) jerk-off material about kids is even remotely okay or normal, then I need you to leave and block me. Doesn't matter what label you use - just block me so I do not interact with you. I'm not interested in arguing; at the end of the day, underage and incest fiction make me incredibly uncomfortable, and that's reason enough to avoid it.
The reason I specified any label at all in my pinned post is because I think sometimes people skim through pinned posts to find that word specifically so they know if somebody is safe to follow or not. I included it to be easily visible so people will know I'm safe to follow. I'll probably take it out honestly at this point to avoid ... [gestures at this ask] happening again, and if someone can't be bothered to read through the post and see my clearly laid out stance, then that's on them.
#this is also making me laugh a little tbh like... you saw my sideblog with its silly pfp ...#... and u thought ''yeah this is someone I need to anonymously Um Ackshually about this'' ???? hello????#i am absolutely FASCINATED by your thought process sjdfjkl but also please do not attempt to converse further w me about this#im just having fun over here my friend. what are u doing. why did u think this was needed LOL#gave me a good opportunity to lay things out though sdfjkl#dandyshucks#hmm i should add a tag to find it later for quick reference in case it comes up again. uhhh what am i going to remember later LMAO#stance#yeah we'll go with that fsdjkl#also yall let me know if you need this CWd at all !!! i am unsure if it needs any CW tags so pls feel free to lmk !!#i won't be posting anything like this ever again so this will be the Only Post here about any of this stuff!
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HAPPY NOW? â
[ j.jh ]
your family has been pressuring you for months to bring your boyfriend, jaehyun, over for dinner, and you think itâs really sweet that they like him so much. the only problem is that your âboyfriendâ jaehyun, hates you.
âââââââââââââââââââââââ
[â] PAIRING. ex!jaehyun x f!reader
[â] GENRE. angst, smut, fluff | fake dating?, exes to ??? au
[â] WC. 19.9k (i donât even know)
[â] WARNINGS. angst, reader has anxiety, mentions of anxiety attacks, fighting, reader be lying a lot, reader has a little sister, crying, reader is kind of a dumbass, explicit content (piv smut), unprotected sex (donât do this gang!), fingering, sex in public kinda, pls lmk if i forgot anything!!
[â] NOTES. iâm so fucking annoyed with tumblr itâs not letting me insert images properly UGH this took me over 2 hours to upload man đŁď¸ im pretty proud of this one âźď¸ idek how it got this long but itâs my longest fic yet and itâs been sitting in my drafts for ages until i finally got the inspo to write it :p i want jaehyun so bad itâs not even funny tbh but anyway PLS GIVE ME FEEDBACK/A REBLOG LITERALLY ANYTHING IS APPRECIATED <33
âââââââââââââââââââââââ
six months.
you haven't seen this door in six months.
it's funny because, this was a door you used to push open and walk through every other day, yet now you stand on the opposite side of it, unsure as to whether you should even be thinking of knocking.
your hand is raised to the door, shaped like a fist but you make no move to actually knock. you were aware that you still had time to bail out of this, that you could turn on your heel and make your merry way back to your sad little house and go back to pretending you're happy with the choice you made six months ago.
or you could just do what you came all the way here to do.
the weather seems to be in your favour, at least. the sun shines radiantly, making the temperature warm, but not too warm, and a cool breeze travels through the air in short intervals. the summer had begun early, birds chirping in their habitual singsong way and wild bougainvillea already flowering in various shades of pink and lilac. usually when the day starts off with good weather, the rest of it follows suit, and thus your day is made better. hopefully, this is the case for you today.
pausing for a short, morale-boosting intake of air, you tighten your fist and knock, knock, knock on the mahogany door, immediately regretting your decision as you feel your stomach churn and plummet. a good ten seconds pass, and you hear no reply nor movement from the inside of the house, and part of you is relieved because that means he may not be home.
more than happy to do a 180° and skip along joyously back to the metro that would take you home, your feet begin to make for that trip but your mind decides against it. you know that you are being overly dramatic, but even with being aware of this, your heart rate does not slow down one bit. you also know that what you've come here to do is more than just selfish, its pathetic and rather embarrassing. it's also a hugely unsavoury request, and if your roles were reversed, you'd most definitely laugh in his face and shut the door.
finally somewhat making up your mind with a quiet groan, you raise your clenched fist and rap against his front door again in a set of three. you nervously shift your weight from your right to your left foot, then back to your right and then once again to your left, the anxiety and anticipation not allowing you to stand still and relax, thinking that if he doesn't answer this time, you really will just return home.
"hold on, i'm coming!", a hurried, muffled voice calls from inside the house and you don't think your heart has ever beaten this fast in your life. not even during the one time you ran a marathon to prove a point to your friend chenle, and while you did show him that you didn't only run to get away from spiders, your body took its own sweet time to recover from that.
now you hear footsteps approaching the door from the opposite side of it, and you don't think you can handle anymore of this tortuous, build up of a wait because you are quite literally one step away from calling it a day and just sprinting your way out of there, just like you did on the last few metres of the aforementioned marathon, and you know he's nearing the door because the footsteps are getting clearer and clearer, and soon he's going to open the door, take one look at you and just slam the door right in your face, but not before spewing verbal explosives at you, which would be totally deserved since he has every right to just spit on you and tell you how you're a terrible, downright horrible human being completely unworthy of forgiveness and-
"sorry for making you wait so long, i was-"
if your heart rate was at its maximum speed before, now it just stopped.
standing in front of you, in the flesh, was the man who's heart you broke six months ago.
jaehyun had just about opened his door in a way that his body was sticking halfway out of it, but he was now frozen in that position, neither in nor out, just stuck there looking like he was contemplating his next move. he adorned a loose, white shirt that clung to his defined shoulders and chest, paired with a pair of red plaid pants with a patch of some different material stitched just above where his knee was. you'd recognise those pants just about anywhere, having worn them a number of times and being the cause of that strange patch with mismatched material (you'd tried to balance a pot of steaming hot ramen on your knee in order to move something, resulting in it causing a burn in the pant).
his attire tells you that he was either just about to eat breakfast, in the process of eating breakfast, or about to finish breakfast; jaehyun was not an early riser and he liked to take his time getting ready for the day.
apart from his slightly changed hair, jaehyun looks the same as he did before, if not better. his once shorter, straight, brown hair, was now a darker kind of black and longer in a silky, mullet-y, layered sort of way, the mullet part stopping just above where his shirt met his neck and the front bits falling on to his face in thin, soft wisps.
everything about the man was captivating and entrancing, but if you had to pick a specific feature that really takes the cake, it would have to be his eyes. his eyes, deep-set and fierce, always gave the impression that he was cold or unapproachable, whereas in reality, he was the opposite. as striking as they may be, they always carried a certain warmth to them.
while they still held the same intensity to them, the warmth was missing as he looked straight at you now. after the brief moment of confusion when he first opened the door dissipated, the familiarity had sunk in, and his expression now was more or less unreadable, but you still tried to make out what he was thinking and feeling- was it shock? anger? maybe even disgust?
"okay, are you going to just stand there or are you going to say something?"
you think it was largely a combination of the last two. in all your fidgeting and gawking, you'd forgotten to actually speak to the man who's door you'd just knocked on, leaving him standing there wordless and confused, an eyebrow raised as he waited for you to open your mouth.
you try to do so, so many words wanting to tumble out your mouth but an invisible gate seems to block it, so now you're just stood still with your mouth opening and closing soundlessly, looking like an idiot.
c'mon y/n, fucking say something, anything-
"how have you been?", is what you decide to go with to break the silence in the end, an awkward smile plastered on to your face. you realise before the sentence is even fully out of your mouth that that would be a really weird thing to start off with, seeing as you and jaehyun have had absolutely zero contact for six months, and are obviously not on the most wonderful terms.
jaehyun's eyebrows furrow, a look of clear disbelief on his face as he clutches his door handle a little tighter. he looks away with a sarcastic smile, shaking his head before turning back to look you dead in the eye. oh, he's going to slam the door on you, you just know it-
"really? 'how have you been'?", he questions incredulously, licking his bottom lip while an exasperated smile plays at them. funnily enough, his response is somewhat relieving to your pitiful self, because you weren't even expecting to hear a reply to what you said, you figured he'd just walk away. you would've. "we haven't seen each for six months since we broke up and 'how have you been' is the best you've got?"
you wince apologetically and bite your lip, playing with your fingers nervously as he quite literally stares you down, irritation written all over his face.
he waits a couple more beats for you to break the tense silence and speak but you are inwardly (and outwardly) struggling to word your thoughts, so he simply scoffs and backs away to return inside.
"okay wait, i didn't tell my family that we broke up and they keep pressuring me to bring you home for the holidays, so i would really like if you'd pretend you don't hate me and come with me."
you don't even want to open your eyes to witness his reaction to your blurted little confession, so you merely stand, frozen in place with your eyes squeezed shut tightly. a couple seconds pass yet you don't hear a door slam, a good sign, so you take that as an affirmative to open your eyes.
he doesn't say anything, or do anything either really, he just leans against his doorframe with another indecipherable expression. this irks you even though you know you have no right to feel irked, but the fact that you once had the ability to know what he was thinking and now don't bothers you to the core. plus, it leaves you feeling unsure as to whether to continue. he might just start laughing at you manically or angrily tell you to get off his property like some bitter, 60-year-old man, and either of these scenarios would be completely fair of him to do.
the heavy realisation that your request sounded absolutely delusional and conceited dawns upon you, and something about his irksome expression makes you feel like you should keep talking. "you have literally every right to just tell me to fuck off, and i don't even expect an answer, i don't really know why i even came here, oh my god- this is so fucking stupid, i'm so fucking stupid and honestly i don't know why you're still standing here listening to me ramble-"
"i need to get ready then. give me ten minutes."
⧠ââââââââ ⧠ââââââââ â§
the front door you're stood at now holds a very different ambience to the previous one. while jaehyun's was quiet and peaceful, the front door to your parents house reveals that the inside is just bustling with activity. the chorus of kate bush's 'running up that hill' plays faintly from behind the door, so you figured that your dad must have brought out his old record player from the dusty attic.
jaehyun stands beside you, hands shoved into the pockets of his light grey hoodie that you feel he must be boiling in, because you're wearing a black tank top with some loose cargoes that you think you might have drenched with sweat.
the sweat would be from the burning heat, but also from the agitation you're really starting to feel. there are so many different ways this dinner could go. what if jaehyun suddenly tells them the truth? then everyone in the room would hate you, and rightly so. you don't want to have to explain to your parents why you broke up with him; it's a stupid fucking reason, if you can even call it that, and it made you completely miserable. how were you supposed explain to your little sister that you and jaehyun aren't together anymore? you suppose relationships are a totally foreign concept to her young mind, but you were sure that she knew you and jaehyun loved each other very much. and you knew she loved jaehyun very much.
he does not look at you, instead choosing to really focus on the christmas themed welcome mat that your parents put out during the winter of '09 and never bothered to change. how he even agreed to come here with you, you don't know, but to say you're grateful would be an understatement.
"you still have time to back out, you know.", you mumble softly, trying to give him one more chance to escape, but he doesn't even spare you a glance, shaking his head and squinting at the door.
"let's just get this over with."
with a small sigh, your raise your hand to press your parents doorbell, the embarrassingly loud 'ding dong' ringing out from behind the door. "oh, that must be her!", you hear the muffled voice of your father speak from the inside, making a slight smile form on your lips.
within a couple seconds, you hear the sound of the muted metal bolt as your dad struggles to open the door to let you in. a grunt of "this damn door..." makes both you and jaehyun release short giggles, and you peek over at jaehyun to see his lips curl upwards into a smile, a small one but it's still breathtakingly pretty . he clears his throat and it's gone in a flash, but the image doesn't leave your mind, and you're still seeing it when your dad finally manages to open the door. "i really need to start using the new lock", he mutters, shifting his eyes to you with a big grin, leaving against the doorframe with his arms folded. "hello, sweetheart."
you chuckle and throw your arms around him, squeezing him a little as he laughs and pats your back in return. releasing you, he turns to jaehyun with a smile, who promptly sticks his hand out politely. "hello, mr. l/n, long time no see."
your dad ignores his hand, throwing his head back with a gruff laugh. "what's with all the formalities, come here, son.", and with that he gives jaehyun a hug as well, a slightly shorter one albeit, but a hug nonetheless. the word 'son' repeats in your mind like an echo, sounding more and more distorted the longer you focus on it. you can't even begin to think of what was going through jaehyun's mind. this was not your brightest idea.
you notice your mom waiting by the door with her hands behind her back, eyes bright and shiny. "hi, mom.", you beam, and she laughs cheerily, opening her arms for you to run into, which you do. she presses numerous kisses to the crown of your head, making you groan lightheartedly and try to escape her hold, but it only tightens. "oh, how i've missed you."
"i missed you too, mom.", you say but she's already let you go and is making a bee line for jaehyun with her arms open, who falls into the hug so readily and comfortably. "i may have missed you, y/n, but i missed jaehyun ten times more.", she jokes, pinching jaehyun's cheeks affectionately.
jaehyun is turning bright red, but he has a toothy grin on his face, a real one, you can tell. his eyes travel the front room where all of you are stood with a nostalgic smile, having not seen it or your parents in over six months. you watch as they look from the various photo frames hung up on the wall alongside the staircase, to the curtains that they recently changed, finally landing on the record player thay was sitting on the table. "wow, mr. l/n, where did you get this?", jaehyun asks, and you wonder whether he's trying to make conversation or if he's genuinely curious. you think it may be the second one.
while him and your dad engage in small talk about his record player, you turn to your mom to ask of the whereabouts of your little sister, and as if on cue, you hear an excited squeal from the top of the stairs. all four heads turn to see your sister bounding down the stairs hurriedly, paying no mind to your mom's strained shout of "careful!".
"y/n!", she piped, finally reaching the bottom of the stairs and running straight to you, wrapping her arms around your legs. she barely reaches your hip so her hug is really just her face pressed into your thigh with her arms squeezing your legs together, while you pat the top of her head.
somehow managing to pry her off of your legs, you kneel and give her a proper hug in return, now happy that you made the decision to come home for a bit of your holiday. she lets go and reaches into her pocket, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper and jutting her hand out to you, urging you to take it.
you smile and furrow your eyebrows with confusion but you take the paper anyway, opening it as carefully as you could so as to not tear it anywhere. smoothing it out flat on your knee, you're greeted with a drawing; two people stand holding hands under a deep blue sky, a large yellow sun shining in one corner along with some "birds" that are really just little 'v's scribbled in black. they're stood on a beach, at least you think they are because there are two shades of blue on the paper, one of them probably being the blue hue of the ocean.
you assume the two people are you and your sister, since one of them has shorter, shoulder length hair and is miniscule compared to the other person, who's hair length and height are similar to yours.
you hold the picture to your chest and pull your sister in for another heartfelt hug, kissing her temple. "is this us?", you ask her, pointing at the two people in the drawing. she gives you a proud nod in return, taking the picture from your hands and holding it in front of her face. "yup! the big girl is you and the small girl is me! we're gonna go swimming.", she informs you, flashing you the toothiest of smiles. "thank you, it's perfect.", you tell her, ruffling her hair a little as she hands you the drawing back.
she clearly doesn't appreciate that, because she whines and swats your hands away, but soon her eyes focus on something behind you and they enlarge, the second excited squeal of the day emerging from her lips. "jae!", she just about screams, completely abandoning you in favour of running off to jaehyun, who has a wide smile on his face and looks equally as happy as her. he scoops her up in his arms and lifts her in front of his face, doing a little spin as peals of laughter escape her.
he finally puts her down but she holds on to his hand, looking at the male with absolute adoration. "hi, cutie.", he boops her nose affectionately to which she giggles, turning to look at you. "you didn't tell me jaehyun was coming!"
"i wasn't sure if he could make it", you reply to her honestly, looking at jaehyun as you speak because only the two of you know what you really mean by that. he holds your eye contact for perhaps a millisecond longer than he did before, but again, it was gone in a flash. he clears his throat a little and straightens up, rocking back on his heels.
sensing a shift in the air but mistaking it for some form of awkwardness, your mother shoos the rest of your family away in the direction of the kitchen. "they probably want to freshen up together, let's let them do that."
once they're gone, it feels like you can finally release your breath, truly seeing this situation going wrong in so many ways. they don't suspect anything yet, but how much longer until they eventually connect the dots? or what if they don't even need to do that, because jaehyun only agreed so he could embarrass you by telling them the whole story? you don't acknowledge the tense silence until jaehyun speaks up. "can i use the guest bathroom? still the second door on the right, yeah?"
you don't respond immediately because you're processing the fact that he still remembers these minute details. you also realise he's only asking because he doesn't want to share your bathroom with you, and that clears your thoughts up a little. you nod in affirmation and he begins climbing up the stairs, and you wait until you hear he's reached the upstairs landing before you move.
it's so tense. the last time you were in this house with jaehyun, you had taken a short road trip to get there. you say road trip, but it was just a couple hours long, but the playlist you and jaehyun had curated said otherwise. you arrived at the house and everyone was all smiles, your parents just happy to have you home and happy to see him as well. you think that part's just as hard as thinking about the two of you together. the fact that your slightly judgemental parents adored him, your little sister looked at him with stars in her eyesâ you had lucked out in every department, and you were always aware of it, the joint guilt you felt from breaking it off and lying to your parents really getting to you now.
you swore that after this was over, you would apologise to jaehyun and finally break the truth to your parents.
finishing off in the bathroom, you step out into the hall, only to bump straight into jaehyun. backing up awkwardly, you both try to get past each but keep going in the same direction, resulting in a bunch of 'sorryâ's and 'waitâ justâ's being blurted out by the two of you. finally getting past you, he doesn't look back at you again, just walking down the stairs mumbling something about "they're waiting...".
wincing, you make your way down the stairs as well, arriving at the living room to see your mom standing beside your dad with an excited expression on her face. you approach with caution, noting that your dad has his hands behind his back. "so...", your mother starts, raising her shoulders a little out of anticipation. "since we haven't seen the two of you in a while...we got you some presents! nothing too grand but..."
"mom, it's not even christmas", you whine, ready to argue with them because you feel bad that whatever they got was still overpriced, but your mother shakes her head, urging your dad to reveal the presents. "just take a look first..."
in one hand he holds a small, white box, no bigger than his palm, and your mom picks it up, holding it out to you. the print on the box is small and typewriter-like, the material it's made out of just screaming fancy. you narrow your eyes at your parents but take the box in your hand anyway, pushing it open. inside, it reveals maybe the prettiest necklace you've seen; dainty and silver, the chain is simple but it's the pendant that's the real charmâ it's an uncut stone of some kind, a pale, translucent white crystal that's pretty much shapeless but it's wrapped in this thin silver wire that forms little loops and hearts over the stone and it makes it so alluring.
"it's a seaglass necklace", your mom speaks, taking the necklace out of its box for you and inclining her head for you to turn around. you're now facing jaehyun, who looks curiously at the new piece of jewellery with the faintest of smiles on his face. pushing your hair to the side, your mother places the necklace around your neck and clasps it (though it takes her a while, squinting and looking at the necklace hook from every angle because she forgot to wear her reading glasses). she leads you to the mirror by the entrance of the hall so you could get a better look at the necklace hanging on top of your collarbones, reaching up to touch it. "you remember? from that lady who owned the fancy place by the beach last summer?"
you do remember. that was the first trip jaehyun had joined you and your family for, under the suggestion of your little sister. when you brought up the fact that jaehyun was going back home to see his parents a little later than he had anticipated, your sister immediately asked if he would want to come with all of you, who were heading to the beach in a day or two for a little family getaway. and much to your surprise, your parents were very warm to the idea of jaehyun accompanying the lot of you. he must have severely impressed them the first time he met them, bringing a bouquet of flowers for your mother and a hearty bottle of whiskey for your dadâ it's like he had won their hearts before he had even stepped inside the house.
of course, he had met them a couple more times again after that, but your parents had never raised any issues about your then boyfriend. your dad had claimed that he wanted jaehyun to come along so he could "keep an eye on him" and "see how he treats you in front of us", but you knew all too well he just wanted someone to talk to about his interest in sound systems. the trip had gone so smoothly, so perfectly and you think that it had planted the seeds of doubt in your mind about your relationship.
the position of the window and sun allowed for the light to bleed on to half of your face, the necklace glinting under the rays as you stood in front of the mirror and surveyed it. the last couple drops of the golden hour sun slipped through the windowpane and painted your skin like it was a canvass and the necklace was the cherry on top. you were radiant, and the look in jaehyun's eyes told you that he knew it too. when your eyes meet in the mirror, it's like he tears his eyes away from you, forcing himself to look at his shoes.
snapping out of your soon-to-be miserable thoughts, you fix a smile on to your face so as to not seem ungrateful, turning to hug your mother. "i love it", and you really do, knowing that you wouldn't be wearing a single other piece of jewellery for the next couple months.
jaehyun stands in the doorway soundlessly, just taking in the scene. he had always told you that he wished his family was as close and tight-knit as yours, but due to his dad always being away on some business trip or another and his mother having her own job to attend to, it resulted in a lot of time spent by himself.
you think that might be way he slotted right in with the rest of you, from the very first meet, because his desire to belong worked very well with your family's lively, chaotic home, which welcomed him right away. this was the main reason why couldnât bring yourself to tell your family that you had broken up him mercilessly. they wouldnât blame you of course, but you know everyone would be immensely disappointed when they realised that he hadnât even done anything wrong in the first place; he was so good to you, and they just wanted to see you happy.
while your mom cooed at how pretty the necklace looked on you, your dad faces jaehyun with a wide grin on his face. "you didn't think we'd forget about you, did you?"
he probably wasn't expecting anything for himself, because you weren't either, so you and jaehyun simultaneously furrow your eyebrows. "oh, mr. l/n, you didn't have toâ", he starts but your father is quick to cut him off, waving his hands. "what nonsense. of course we had to get you something, it's no big deal", he tries to appear nonchalant but the smile that creeps on to his face is a telltale sign that it is, in fact, a big deal. "besides, if you're family to y/n, you're family to us."
it's as if someone just stuck a large knife into you, the pang you just felt in your stomach. you can't even begin to think about what must be going through jaehyun's head, because even he can't hide the way his eyes soften at your dad's words. watching your sister spring up from the couch, she runs behind your father and plucks whatever he was holding out of his hands, now revealed to be a medium-sized bag. "i wanna give it to jaehyun!", with that, she's running over to him with the toothiest smile plastered on her cheeks, holding the bag out to jaehyun with stretched arms.
he ruffles her hair just like you did, but she makes absolutely zero complaints as he does itâ if anything she's revelling in it. this makes you want to scoff, but you smile instead without thinking about it, taking a couple steps away from the mirror and towards them. "are you gonna open it or should i take it back to the store?", your dad jokes and jaehyun chuckles quietly while you don't even bother forcing a laugh, and he takes the bag from your sister's hands, mumbling a soft 'thank you'.
from where you're standing, you can't see what's inside the bag, but you can see jaehyun's eyes widen when he looks inside and back up at everyone. "me and mrs. l/n, i can't take this."
"of course you can", your mother tuts in response, dismissing him with her hand. "if i recall correctly, you had said something about your airpods not working properly?"
realisation dawns on your face when jaehyun pulls the shiny headphones from the bag, turning them over in his hand. "i think i did mention it, yeah...", he nods, eyes scanning over the clear box he holds. you remember that only one of his airpods would function properly, the other deciding whenever it wanted to do its job. you didn't realise your parents remembered, as well. "but these are so expensive, i can'tâ"
"do you like them or not?", your dad asks, shrugging his shoulders. jaehyun's quick to nod, "yes, i love them butâ"
"then end of story." your father's not hearing anyone out, even going so far as to cover his ears jokingly when jaehyun opens his mouth again. after your sister tugs on his pant leg and urges him to try them out, jaehyun slips them over his ears, whipping his phone to connect them to it. he thought it was too expensive to try fixing his airpods so he resorted to listening with just the one ear in, or using your headphones till you broke up.
by the look on his face, they work just fine, and he couldn't be happier. a wide smile is pressed on his face, a real one that doesn't even drop when he makes eye contact with you. you smile back at him slowly, but he doesn't look away immediately, slowly turning to look at your parents. "i don't know what to say. thank you."
you'd had a couple boyfriends before, not none as close to your family as jaehyun had been. none of your previous relationships had lasted very long and you could never pinpoint the exact reason why, you just knew at some point that you had to break it off. your mother always thought that this was a result of your first ever relationship, the first and last man that ever dumped you. it crushed you at the time, though you were able to power through, but since then, relationships were never your strong suit. change seemed promising when you met jaehyun through a mutual friend, however. he was kind, he was smart and he was genuine, three traits that you didn't typically see in guys you dated, but you didn't see any reason to dwell on your biggest fumble yet.
the rest of time until dinner continues in a steadfast manner with all of you sitting in the living room. the scene looked like something out of a corny movie montage, but the beautiful part of it was that it was reality, all the laughs, the eye-smiles, the stupid jokes and conversations, all of it. your parents had recently returned from a holiday together that they took to celebrate their wedding anniversary, which meant that you two deserved to look through all eight hundred and sixty two of the photos they took. super proud of the new projector he had ordered off amazon, your dad had connected his phone to it and was going through his gallery slideshow-style, with your mom making offhand comments about every other photo.
"that's from when we went on a date to this fancy restaurant, that's from the shoe store your dad wanted to go to...oh! that's when your dad just learnt how to take 0.5x pictures on his new phone!"
your mom speaks animatedly while each photo is being shown, pointing out various different things without any prompting. there were badly taken selfies of your parents that made both you and jaehyun laugh, pictures of the different kinds of food they ate, the said 0.5's of your mother taken from the top of her foreheadâ your dad was slapping his knee even though your mom wasn't too impressed.
after what seemed like years, they ran out of vacation pictures and moved on to pictures and videos taken during your little sister's talent show. this was especially endearing, because your normally high-energy sister was suddenly all shy and avoidant of eye contact in the presence of jaehyun, particularly displeased with a video of her singing on stage.
jaehyun wipes the pout right off her face however, poking her cheek with a smile. "you sound amazing, s/n", he pipes genuinely, and she's back to smiling again, even offering to sing the song for everyone towards the end. no one has the heart to turn down so innocent a request, so for the next couple minutes you are subjected to a very slightly off-key rendition of some song from the movie 'frozen'. everyone cheers when she is done, jaehyun even throwing in a little "whoo!" for good measure, and your sister performs a small curtsey before seating herself between you and jaehyun's legs.
you're situated on the same couch, but only so that things don't look weird. you invited him here to pose as your boyfriend, and he agreed, so you have to play the part too. that part wasn't as hard as you expected, the acting like a couple, no, it was the avoiding questions that was really getting to you. at some point in the conversation, your dad had congenially asked jaehyun when the next time he'd be coming home was. normally, he would congenially reply with something like "as soon as possible", but this time, he just froze. he appeared to attempt a reply, but was cut short at "uhâ", the rest of the sentence never following through.
hoping to repair the awkward moment, you start to construct a fib. "jaehyun's been uhâ you know, working at one of those um, nursing homesâ", this is too out-of-the-box a reply even for jaehyun who turns to you, trying and failing to the hide incredulous look on his face.
"a nursing home? oh, i didn't know you were training to be a nurse!", your mother is surprised but definitely not disappointed, placing her hand on her chest with a sympathetic look on her face as she looks at jaehyun. he looks as if he's trying to speak to you using only his eyes, widening and squinting them at a rapid pace, tilting his head towards you so your parents don't see his expression. there are clear signs of confusion and you're aware he's questioning your decisions, but that's as far as you get with his eye signals and you let him know by shrugging and wincing, so he closes them while sighing inwardly and turns to face your parents, a fake smile stuck on his lips.
"yes! haha, funny story, this one...", he grits his teeth but furthers your stupid concoction of a story, snapping his fingers while trying to think. "i'm not really training to be a nurse, i just volunteer there sometimes. love being around old people, you know, makes me feel full of lifeâ"
you cut him off before he can make this even worse for the both of you, taking in your mother's furrowed eyebrows and your dad's slightly opened mouth. "yes, well, it's hard for him to catch a break, you know, with all the...", you slap your hand over his knee and give it a little squeeze, turning to him with a grin while he smiles tightly back at you, eyes focusing on the hand on his thigh without changing his expression. "...hard work he does."
jaehyun's eyes don't leave your hand, seeing as this is the first act of skinship in six months, albeit casual. your hand feels so hot that you think you might be burning a hole through the material of jaehyun's jeans, finally ripping your hand off of him.
"of course...", your father trails off in confusion, and no one can seem to make head or tails of the situation. in a moment, your mother pauses before clapping her hands, seemingly already forgotten about the strange situation as she chimes "dinner in five!~". your sister scampers off with claims of helping your mother out in the kitchen (and probably to try and secure a spot close to you and jaehyun), and jaehyun stands up and heads to the cupboard containing all your placemats without out even being asked. you offer to help but he shakes his head, and you opt to go sit back down on one of the arm chairs facing the kitchen area, just observing.
this was one of jaehyun's qualities that made you fall in love with him, but also pissed you off to no end. first of all, didn't he ever get tired of just being so good all the time? second of all, why couldn't his own parents see what everyone else saw in him? and thirdly, why did you choose to ruin your life six months ago? as for the last one, you knew why, but the extent of your stupidity was real apparent to you now.
you look away when he meets your eyes and catches you, your heart beating fast when you see out of the corner of your eye that his gaze lingers for a moment or two. underneath all that hatred, was there still a small part of him that cared about you? after you broke up with him, over call that too, he attempted to call you back two or three times, but you couldn't bring yourself to pick up. out of fear or maybe even shame, you never answered his calls and since then, you'd had no contact.
it was impossible. with a break-up like that and six month's worth of time to sit and think about it, you imagine that one could hold a surprising amount of hatred for someoneâespecially after a relationship as real as yours. if you switched the roles, you think you wouldn't feel much different.
at your mom's signal, you heave yourself off the couch and to the dining table, seating yourself next to jaehyun (everyone expected you to sit with him, they left the chair empty on purpose). your sister has already claimed the spot opposite jaehyun and was patiently awaiting the vegetables that she knew your mother was going to pile on her plate, a little pout forming on her lips at the sight of broccoli. "you can't make that face every time, like i'm feeding you dog food", your mother scolds her with a smile, giving her a generous helping of veggies. the pout deepens and she folds her arms with a cross look on her face. "you guys don't have to eat the broccoli. why do i?"
she's got a point, you think, but before you can tell her to just eat them, jaehyun speaks. "that's exactly what my little cousin sungchan said...", jaehyun tells her, looking around the table with a dramatic sigh. "and we all know what happened to him..."
little cousin sungchan? as far as you know, there is no little cousin sungchan, and you know a lot about jaehyun's family, so you put your fork down in favour of listening to his story at the same time your sister curiously asks, "what happened?".
"well, like you, sungchan didn't like eating his veggies", starting off the story with a shrug under your mother's listening ears, he talks in a low voice. "he'd always argue with my aunt till one day, he refused to eat them.
your sister is knocking food around her plate while she listened to jaehyun, and she's not impressed with the story so far. "see! why can't i do that?", she asks indignantly, and your mother shoots jaehyun a look to which he winced and continues. "nothing happened for a while, so sungchan thought he had proved his point. but he hadn't heard of the veggie monster."
the story is heading in such a stupid direction that you almost laugh out loud, but you catch yourself when you notice your sister's expression, guarded and wary. "...the veggie monster? ...that's not real...", she speaks like she's not fully sure of her words herself, pausing her attack on her food.
"sungchan thought that too", jaehyun agrees, lowering his voice like one would when telling a scary story, looking around him like it could be listening before continuing, for the story's sake. "but he didn't know that without veggies, a child's body is weak. their bones don't grow strong, they stay small and their minds aren't sharp at all. that's how the veggie monster chooses his targets."
you hold back a snort at your sister's wide-eyed expression and how serious jaehyun looks, he's even got your dad attempting to look nonchalant as he followed the story. "the less veggies a kid eats, the weaker they get, and that's easy pickings for the veggie monster. he comes late at night, and there's no point in hiding because he knows. he can smell when a kid doesn't have enough vitamins and it makes him hungry."
with your sister, your parents and even you hanging on to every word, jaehyun lowers his voice to almost a whisper, and all of you lean in closer to listen. "legend has it that he looks so scary that you lose the ability to move or speak, so he just takes you. sungchan was never seen again. the police said he was missing but i knew what happened to him."
you have to admit, jaehyun can tell a story. the atmosphere felt more eerie as he concluded the story cryptically, but your sister looks positively gutted. "did he take him?", she questions, face white and voice small. he nods slowly, like he didn't want to be talking about this, and all you can think about is how this man deserved an award after the show he put on. "i had my suspicions. no one believed me, but i'm ninety-nine percent sure that at dinner, i saw a pair of dark, red eyes staring straight into the kitchen from the window."
as if nature was a paid fucking actor, a slight crash sounds from outside the window on cue, like if a cat knocked over a plastic bin, but you're pretty sure your sister shit her pants. you've never seen her shovel vegetables into her mouth at that kind of record speed before, even your parents are looking at her astounded. with her food in her mouth, she pleads with glazed eyes, "pleaseâ i'm sorry, i'll have my veggies, don't let him take me!"
it takes all of you a little while to convince your sister that she'd be completely fine if she ate all the veggies given to her and that the veggie monster wouldn't even think of her, but it's safe to say that she'd never leave a bit of stray carrot on her plate ever again. your mom comically mouths 'thank you' to jaehyun which makes you laugh, and you turn to smile at him, and he gives you a nod in return. small steps, you think, because a nod is a whole lot better than a glare.
the rest of the dinner continues as if nothing changed. sure, you and jaehyun knew things were different, but it didn't fully feel like it at the moment. your mom had prepared a lot of nice food for the occasion, and your dad even helped, particularly proud of the way his stir fry turned out. jaehyun made sure to compliment both your parents on their cooking, and they all but meltedâ he still knew exactly how to talk to them. conversation was easy; you talked about work, you talked about how university was going, you talked about the school play your sister was going to take part in, about jaehyun's parents, nothing was forced.
you'd fall into comfortable silences at times in favour of sitting back and observing, listening, just being a part of the moment. for someone who was so reluctant to be here, jaehyun seems comfortable, the familiarity of the situation helping ease the tension between the two of you. expecting some bumps along the way, you were rather pleased with how things were turning out, but you were also anticipating the end of the lovely eveningâ where you and jaehyun would eventually go your separate ways. you don't want to think about it just yet, not when everything was going so smoothly, and your opportunity to snap out of your thoughts is presented to you, just not in the way you would have liked.
your mother's question seems to have thrown jaehyun for a loop as well, because his eyebrows are furrowed and he looks blatantly confused. at some point during a lull in the conversation, your mother had politely asked jaehyun how his christmas in japan had gone; the only problem with this question was that he never had a christmas in japan, not to his knowledge anyway. this, was yet another lie you had told your parents, when they had asked why jaehyun hadn't accompanied you home to celebrate christmas, like he had originally planned to. unbeknownst to them, you had already broken up with him prior to the christmas holidays, so jaehyun wasn't exactly going to come along anyway. so, you told them that he had to spend christmas with an aunt in japan, for familial reasons.
you didn't exactly have time to prep jaehyun and give him a run down of every single lie he had to play along with, so he turns to you with a look of uncertainty and desperation in his eyes. "my, uh- christmas? in japan?", he puts emphasis on the two keywords, not blinking when he speaks directly to you in hopes that you would take the hint and help him out.
"yeah, your christmas. in japan. with your aunt", you reply to him with the same tone and expression as he does, trying your best to sound subtle so your parents don't catch on.
"yes, with your aunt! we were so sad to hear that you couldn't make it for christmas", your mother is unknowingly helping jaehyun catch up with the fake story, and he releases a short "ahh" during his moment of 'recollection'. "right, my real aunt who definitely lives in japan."
he grits his teeth when he talks, making you grimace and the fact that your parents look completely puzzled doesn't help. you need to save your dignity anyway, so you try to cut jaehyun off before he can make things worse. "haha, jaehyun of course she's your real aunt, silly", you awkwardly chuckle, feigning nonchalance when you bump his shoulder with your fist, wishing you could telepathically communicate with him right now, but you'd probably only be saying "please, please, please" on repeat.
he sighs but speaks up again, much to your relief. "it was slightly boring, my aunt doesn't do much", he laughs softly, fully back in character. "but you know, it's still nice to spend time with your family."
if your parents are suspicious, they don't say anything, seemingly satisfied with jaehyun's answer. dinner continues with few hitches until jaehyun insists that he washes the dishes. "it's the least i can do, after you both made such delicious food."
your mother at least tries to argue with him for a bit, but your dad is quite happy to not have to wash dishes, patting jaehyun on the back before standing up. what surprises you however, is jaehyun turning to you with the sweetest, most fake smile you've seen in a minute plastered on his face. "you mind helping, y/n?"
smiling tightly, you nod and begin clearing the table. this is done in silence, neither of you even looking at each other as you pick up dishes and carry them to the kitchen. your sister has run off to the living room to watch some t.v with your dad, and it feels like you're finally allowed to breathe when your mother exits the room as youâre picking up the last dirty dish. walking into the kitchen, jaehyun's back is facing you while he washes dishes, the environment and the little tune he's humming making everything seem so domestic in your eyes. this is how dinner used to always go when he came over, with you and him washing the dishes together in the end, taking breaks to splash each other with the soapy water or making out secretly by the counter.
but the air is foreign now, none of the former warmth or softness remaining. he turns to you with a frown when you place the final dish on the side of the sink, and he really doesn't look too happy. "visiting an aunt in japan? really?", he scoffs, looking incredulous while you look sheepish, avoiding his eye contact entirely.
you were expecting something like this but you hated being put on the spot. "i don't know, okay, what else was i supposed to say?", the exasperation in your voice is evident but it only fuels jaehyun, and rightfully so.
"i got an idea, how about 'oh, he can't come because i dumped his ass over call for no reason, sorry'?", he digs snidely, voice laden with scorn. there it is. "or is that too close to the truth for you?"
he doesnât even let you open your mouth, chucking the cloth he was using to dry the dishes on the counter somewhere, folding his arms while he looks at you in a hostile way. âyou wanna know how i really spent my christmas, y/n?â, he sneers sardonically, a sarcastic smile etched on to his lips. âalone in my house. miserable. i wish i had an aunt in fucking japan that i couldâve spent it with.â
you hate to admit it, but his words sting and you are well aware that you deserve it. just asking him to join you for this dinner was a huge reach, a request you really didn't expect him to accept. you don't fully understand why he did, though. he clearly despised you, so many be it was out of love for your family? you know jaehyun cared for them, but doing all this was uncharacteristic even for him. when you don't say anything but wear an agonised expression on your face, jaehyun further questions you.
"do you not have anything to say for yourself?", he tries again, his voice a little softer and more hopeful than before but you look like you're fighting some internal battle that doesn't involve him. he exhales deeply, clearly disappointed in your lack of an explanation and just walks past you and out of the kitchen.
you remain in the kitchen for a couple beats more, trying your level best to collect yourself. you can feel tears pricking the corners of your eyes and your breathing is quicker, but this is the absolute worst time to have a little panic attack in the kitchen. how you wished the two of you could just forget about everything for a minute so you could wrap your arms around his figure and fall into his embrace, feeling like that would solve all your problems. it's selfish and wrong, but you know that you're not getting over jaehyun anytime soon.
you'd come to that conclusion a couple months back. the first month after you broke things off with him was possibly the worst time of your life, struggling to eat, sleep or even get out of bed. your friends urged you to reach out to him like they knew you wanted to, but you remained stubborn, convinced at the time that you had made the right decision that would hurt the least for the both of you. you were wrong, you could see that now, but you knew it was much too late. you'd already gone through all the stages of grief, but seeing jaehyun again in this environment had really gone and thrown a spanner in the works for you, all because of your terrible decision-making skills.
any hopes you had of the two of you at least being on semi-friendly terms had just flown out the window as well, and you suddenly think that this might've been the reason why jaehyun even agreed to come. an explanation. a well-deserved one at that. you don't know why you find it so hard to give him one, but you suspect it's because you're not ready to face all that yourself.
upon hearing your mother faintly call out your name, you realise how long you've been standing in the kitchen, taking a couple more deep breaths before you join the rest of them. it's clear that everyone's winding down, your sister curled up on your dad's lap, trying to blink away her sleepiness, while everyone else mutedly watched the television. "didn't mean to keep you all up past your bedtime", you try to joke lightheartedly because your parents look like they're about to hit the hay themselves, but it's really so that no one suspects you were having a little breakdown in the kitchen; especially jaehyun.
"you're not wrong", your dad agrees gruffly, stretching a little before tapping on your sister's cheek to wake her, much to her displeasure. "it's technically your mama's turn to put you to bed, isn't it?", he attempts, but is quickly shot down by your mother, pinching his arm after claiming it was certainly not her turn. after their grand performance, both of them comically turn to look at you with a suspiciously bright look in their eyes. you don't even have time to argue, because the second the hint of a sigh leaves your mouth, they're saying "thank you" and "how nice of you to offer", urging your sister to wake up to let her know that you'll be tucking her in tonight.
she perks up a little at this, nodding with a little glint in her eyes. hopping off your dad's lap, she sleepily totters over to you. "can jae come too?", her voice is hopeful and small, and she yawns in the middle of her sentence but she just has this certain charm that makes everyone unable to say 'no' to her. this includes jaehyun, because one look from her with her arms raised and he's picking her up, pretending to complain about it. you can't help but smile at the whole interaction.
"oh quick! before i forget...", your mom gasps in remembrance, picking her phone up from the coffee table with a tired smile. "don't know when i'll get to see the two of you again so, pictures!"
this may be the only part you were slightly prepared for. your mother had a special affinity for taking photos; not that she was any good at it, she just enjoyed capturing these little moments and treating her gallery like a scrapbook. she had more or less documented the entirety of you and jaehyun's relationship, from the first few months where all the photos were cheesy smiles and awkward poses, to when you had grown more comfortable around each other. in fact, a photo she had taken of jaehyun was your wallpaper for quite some time (it took a lot of effort and explaining to help your mom airdrop you the picture)â it was a shot of jaehyun and your sister grinning from ear to ear, both adorning aprons that were covered in flour after a failed attempt at baking cookies.
the point being, you're pretty sure jaehyun was also expecting the pictures, so it didn't really surprise you when he plastered a smile on his face and came to stand beside you. his hand finds the small of your back soon enough and it makes your body stiffen while simultaneously sending a jolt through it, and jaehyun feels it. mistaking the action for uneasiness, he immediately lifts his warm hand off you so that it's now hovering awkwardly over your body, though no one can see that from the front. while you are disappointed, you lean into him anyway, clasping your hands together behind your back as you both give the camera wide smiles. you're so close you can smell his cologne and it's making you dizzy, not because the scent is overpowering but because it's just so familiar and you can't get enough of it.
the moment is gone in a flash because your mother takes three to four photos while cooing at the two of you before she decides to call it a night, and then jaehyun is ripping himself from you. you don't think anyone else recognises it, the way he seems to want to be as far from you as possible because he's so good at masking these things, but you can feel it. you can feel this heat radiating off of his body whenever he's near you and it's not the warm, fuzzy kind of heat. the spot on your back where his hand rested still burns a little.
your parents are exhausted and look more than happy to be able to jump straight into bed, but not before thanking you and jaehyun. you hug and kiss them goodnight, promising that your next visit will be sooner than this one before they exchange pleasantries with jaehyun, making him promise the same. you know this has to be hard on him, making a mental note to apologise profusely before you part ways. with a reminder that the door now locks from the inside, they bid you goodnight and goodbye, trudging off to their room while your sister scampers up the stairs to hers, suddenly full of life.
you understand why your parents were more than happy to hand over bedtime duties to you and your "boyfriend", because putting your little sister to bed turned out to be a piece of work. she started off by blatantly refusing to brush her teeth, but jaehyun had that one sorted when he reminded her that the veggie monster had a lot of friends, so that was done. she changed into her pyjamas all on her own which was a relief, but you were at a loss over how to actually get her into bed.
you both humoured her for a bit, understanding that she was just happy to have her big sister and her big sister's nice boyfriend home again, so a little excitement was expected. jaehyun played along with her, which was a sight to see, following along with the characters she assigned him in her imaginary games. but when bouncing on her bed turned into running around the room like a crazed bunny, it was a little harder to convince her that she needed to sleep now. "look at me, i'm wide awake", she insists, widening her eyes with her fingers to show you both just how awake she was. jaehyun tried a couple times to catch her, but you're both taken by surprise at her remarkable speed and agility. in the end, you had to resort to just sitting down and hoping that she'll tire herself out, which eventually does happen.
she climbs into bed of her own accord, rubbing at her eyes while you pull the duvet over her body, up to her shoulders. "when are you coming next?", she mumbles curiously while you sit on the edge of her bed, jaehyun standing close by. "soon", you reply honestly, knowing that you'll always have a safe place to come to whenever you need. "maybe i'll even stay for a whole weekend next time."
she likes the sound of this, smiling tiredly with her hands peeking over the edge of her cover, holding it closer to her. "will you come too?", this question is directed towards jaehyun, who looks defeated when he opens his mouth to answer. it's not fair, expecting him to lie to your family like this, but you know you've gotta come clean soon. you'd made up your mind at this point and come up with a plan; you'd explain yourself to jaehyun and apologise after which you'll go your separate ways, then you'll tell your family the truth after tonight, or at least make up a more recent break up, and that's that.
when jaehyun looks to you for help, you play with your hands a little, not fully knowing what to say. "if the old ladies at the nursing home let him go, maybe...", is what you decide is the safest option to go with, and your sister seems satisfied enough, giggling drowsily. you know she's close to falling asleep, and you're about to inwardly celebrate a job well done when she pops her next, unexpected question. "will you both be together forever?"
oh. there's a hint of teasing behind her voice, but everything else about the question is innocent and genuine, blinking her eyes open so she can look at the both of you when you answer. though you're not touching him, you can feel jaehyun stiffen next to you, his voice sounding more than a little awkward when he lets out an involuntary "uhh".
"what do you mean, cutie?"
you don't know why he asks that, because it's a pretty straightforward question; will the two of you be together forever? you want to laugh at the irony because you know that if she had asked the same question last time jaehyun came home, you both would have exchanged knowing smiles, giggling shyly while you tried to answer. the answer would've been 'yes', and you know deep down that it still should be.
she clicks her tongue like it's the most obvious and easy question in the world, shrugging her shoulders when she speaks. "you know, that's what people do when they're in love,", she answers with no hesitation, and you want to roll your eyes because who kidnapped your little sister and replaced her with dhar mann? "just like mommy and daddy!"
"daddy and mommy are married, sweetie, it's a little differentâ"
"i know that", she cuts off your little improvised answer in a deadpan voice that almost makes you feel stupid, but all her questions have your heart thudding against your rib cage, and you're praying to god that jaehyun can't hear it too. "but still, they love each other, and that's why they're together forever. don't you love each other?"
you're pretty sure the world stopped spinning and your heart stopped beating simultaneously, most definitely not expecting these kinds of questions from your sister. how do you even prepare an answer for this kind of situation? you know for a fact that your cheeks are coated in a dark sheen of red, and out of the corner of your eye (because you refuse to look at him), youâre pretty sure you can see the distinct pink colour paint the tips of jaehyun's ears, like they always do when he's shy or embarrassed. you can't not give her an answer, because that looks weird and she's clearly waiting for one, but answering meant that you either tell her the truth, that no, you will not be together forever because your dumbass went and ruined everything for the both of you six months ago, or you can lie and say that she's right, which would be admitting a lot of things that you didn't want to admitâ
"nothing's for sure, but you're right, if two people really do love each other...", jaehyun's deep voice brings all your spiralling thoughts to a halt, and you look at him for the first time in a bit, only to find that he's already looking at you, gaze raw and piercing. you hold your breath when he speaks, because you don't trust yourself at the moment. "...they'll end up together forever."
you hear your sister make some kind of a reply, but the heartbeat in your ears is so loud that you don't quite catch it, the eye contact you're holding with jaehyun so intense that it feels wrong to look away. what could he have possibly meant by that? or was it just some half-assed answer to get your sister to go to sleep? you realise that staring at him while trying to use your sixth sense to nonverbally convey these questions to him isn't going to work, but you can feel the lump forming in your throat, needing to get out of this situation quickly.
it takes everything in you to break the eye contact in favour of pressing a quick peck to your sister's temple, and she looks about ten seconds away from just crashing. "night y/n, night jae...", and with that she's out like a light, and you two wait wordlessly until her breathing evens out before silently exiting the room.
once her bedroom door is shut, you make a beeline for the front door, way too scared and vulnerable right now to look at jaehyun. he doesn't say anything, so neither do you, making sure the door is actually locked before taking your phone out of your pocket. the time on your phone screen reads '11:43', and you know it's too late to try and catch the metro or a bus, but you're too stubborn and embarrassed to ask jaehyun to drop you.
the air is cold outside, much colder than it was inside your warm house. at the current moment, there is no breeze either, the trees are still and there are only a few lights on around the street, and it just makes everything seem so still and loud. you look out at the road, eyes zeroing in on this one lamp post where you shared one of your first few kisses with the man standing beside you. it's crazy how time can change things, you think, because never would you have believed in the moment that jaehyun called you "the most beautiful girl in the world" before leaning in to sweetly connect your lips that he could ever be something so close to a stranger within months.
ultimately opting to look at him, you're once again unable to read the expression on his face as you try your best to speak your mind to him. "um, i'm gonna book a cab, so you're officially free to go. thanks again for tonight, you really didn't have to come with me, so i owe you one. or i don't have to owe you one, because we're not going to see each other again- anything's good with me, just uh...thanks."
he waits patiently for you to finish, and aside from the slightest hint of amusement in his eyes, you're at a loss over what he's really thinking, but his face is so stupidly handsome that you're feeling angry and a little awkward, choosing to look around, and at the floor, playing with your fingers as you spoke.
"you're so dramatic y/n, i can drop you home, it's no big deal", he's already walking towards the road and biting his lip, and you can't tell whether it's out of habit or if he's trying to hide a smile, yet something tells you that it might be the latter.
"so you just let me say all that even though you were gonna offer to drop me? dude..."
the initial ten minutes of the drive are uncommunicative, both of you choosing to look at the dark road instead of acknowledging the awkward silence that was swallowing the car up whole. you donât talk about your argument in the kitchen, you donât make small talk about dinner, you donât talk. you'd normally play some music in the background and you know that your phone is definitely still connected to his car's bluetooth, but somehow it just doesn't feel rightâ punishing yourself by sitting in this impenetrable silence should do you better.
the roads are more or less empty, save for the lone car or bike that speeds past you. jaehyun knows the way to your house from your parent's because of the amount of times you've driven back and forth, so you don't feel the need to tell him to turn right or to keep going down a certain road, making for even more silence.
part of you is still a little thankful that it isn't the most short drive, even though you aren't even speaking to each other. all it takes is picturing your empty house, devoid of the homely domestic feeling it used to carry when jaehyun was a frequent visitor. what would you even do when you got home? wallow in self-pity over your life choices? play 'sweet' by cigarettes after sex because it reminds you of him, then put on his hoodie that doesn't even smell like him anymore, just so you can curl up in bed and have a good cry while you reminisce? you're starting to think that maybe attempting to talk to him isn't the worst idea, at least it'll give you something to cry about later.
you're going crazy wracking your brain, trying to think of something to say that wouldn't make the atmosphere even more uneasy, but all you got was "hey, thanks again for coming" and "hey, sorry for breaking up with you, what's good though?". you can't even help the wince creeping on your face, finally choosing to go with the former before you have a heart attack and die in jaehyun's front seat.
"thanks again for agreeing to come", you start, absolutely hating the break in your voice from not talking for some time. "you really didn't have to do that. and for dropping me."
he offers you a quick nod in your general direction and fixes his eyes on the road ahead like he was zipping through a crowded highway, though you're sure there isn't a car in sight. "like i said, it's cool", is all you get in return, and you have to remind yourself that he has every right to be short with you.
but still, you try again. "and you don't have to worry about my parents", chewing on your bottom lip, you actually look at him this time, hoping it'll prompt him to do the same, but it doesn't. "i'm gonna tell them the truth."
he releases a short breath from his nose like he finds your statement funny, but continues to not really say anything, just nodding to indicate that he heard you. you subconsciously clench and unclench your jaw at that, because god, he's so fucking annoying, but you swear you don't mean to release the slightly irritated sigh that you do. if you hadn't seen his knuckles turning white from how hard he's gripping the steering wheel, you might not have known that your little sigh pissed him off, because you can't tell it from his face, save from the barely-there eyebrow twitch.
you don't know what it is about car rides with only one other person that make you feel so vulnerable, but you think paired with this kind of silence, you could potentially confess to murder in this setting. it's infuriating, how unresponsive he is, and part of you thinks you're jealous of the control he's exerting, because you're dead sure that if you were in his position, you'd have a fair amount to say. it must be satisfying for him in a way, watching you squirm like this out of guilt and discomfort, but you know in your heart that jaehyun simply isn't like that.
"look, jaehyun", your mouth is working faster than your brain, the silence proving to be too much for you to handle. "i know i fucked things up a bit. with how i ended it and everything..."
perhaps you should've taken a little more time to properly articulate your thoughts, because even jaehyun can't control the astounded scoff that slips out of his mouth. you yourself can't believe that you chose to deliver your words like that and it makes you sound so self-righteous, but they're out, and now you're bracing yourself to finally hear what jaehyun really has to say.
"fucked things up a bit? are you serious?", you can hear it in his voice that he's holding back, but he chooses to laugh in disbelief instead, which you think is actually worse than him straight up screaming at you. "y/n, you didn't even bother telling me in person. you dumped me over the fucking phone, saying it wasn't working."
you now kind of wish that you had just kept quiet and sat in his awkward car, and exchanged awkward niceties when you reach home, never to see him again. but this is your final chance at some form of redemption, and now that jaehyun was actually speaking his mind instead of giving you tight nods, you tried to explain yourself.
"jaehyun, i know, i justâ"
"i called you a bunch of times. i tried to come see you and everything, but you went and changed your lock and all your friends were saying you didn't want to see me?"
there goes trying to explain yourself. so you sat and listened instead, and it was the least you could do. jaehyun's voice became more and more strained as he talked, the emotions he was feeling now a lot more evident. he was angry, but more importantly, he was confused, and sad.
"i just- i didn't know what went wrong, you know? we were completely fine as far as i knew", he continues on in a laboured way and he's not looking for you speak right now, so you don't. "fuck i- i thought we were in love."
the little laugh he lets out in between his words more or less breaks your heart, the whole scenario sounding all too familiar. those exact words were the last thing you'd heard from jaehyun before you fully and cruelly broke things off, letting him know the decision was final before cutting the call. you remember that day so clearly. you had meant to go see him and explain all this in person, thatâs the whole reason you were in the car, but for some reason, you just couldnât do it. you remember how much your hands were shaking as you waited for him to pick up the call, sitting in the car by yourself in the middle of your driveway. how long you sat and cried after you ended the call, tears falling until there weren't any left. how it began raining the very second you stepped out of your car to go back inside.
the weather was a funny thing, choosing to mirror your mood only when it saw fit. it was warm and sunny on the day you broke up with him, gentle breeze and wispy clouds all around. it was warm and sunny this morning, the weather ever so pleasant as you plucked up the courage to walk to his door. it was still unusually warm and sunny for the couple months following your break up, feeling sour as ever that the weather was so lovely and all you could do was sit in your room and feel sorry.
you took note of all these occasions because it always used to piss you off. though you shiver now in the car, you think it's kind of satisfying in a way, because the only two times your mood and the weather lined up was right after the break up, and the second you stepped outside your house with jaehyun; it feels like a premonition, or a revelation of sorts. the grey of the stormy sky matched the absolute devastation you felt after breaking up with him, rain pouring from the heavy clouds like they were crying for you. now, the cold, still air feels like baited breath, awaiting your next move.
"and nothing, i hear nothing from you for six fucking months until you're suddenly on my doorstep, asking me to pretend to be your boyfriend for a night. that's fucking insane!", he sounds a little wild now, very exasperated, but you figure it's probably better to just let him get it all out of his system, and you'd do good to listen to him as well. everything he's saying makes complete sense, all the emotions he dealt with akin to what you would've gone through had it been you in his place. "and you know what's more insane? i agreed. after all that, i agreed."
thatâs the part you donât understand. your heart is racing listening to him and you have so many thoughts swimming around in your head, it's difficult to filter them. you feel similar to how you felt back in the kitchen, although this time you can't take a minute by yourself to get over it. you absolutely refuse to cry in this moment, not wanting to seem like you're trying to victimise yourself when you are aware you're the problem. but you can feel your heart breaking all over again.
"why did you agree?", you physically can't raise your voice to louder than a whisper, the tension too thick to try and overpower it.
"why did you dump me?", he counters like a child, and while you were expecting the question, it still makes you freeze up a little. he huffs in annoyance when you don't say anything, inclining his head while he waits expectantly for you to answer. "you wanted to talk? let's talk, y/n. you don't get to just waltz back into my life like it's nothing. it's not fair,"Â it's so cold, the way he says your name, but you try your best not to let it further shake you, mustering up the courage to finally speak. "it's so stupid, jaehyun."
he looks like he's about two seconds away from just combusting, the only sound piercing the cold air being the gentle hum of the engine. "don't you think i deserve to know?", he urges, voice edged with hurt and frustration. "i spent the whole day with you and your family, pretending like everything was happy and normal when it's not."
"i know, jaehyun-"
"then, tell me."
you shift uncomfortably in your seat, teeth toying with your bottom lip as you avoid looking at him. "i don't know," you murmur, your voice barely audible to yourself over the pounding of your heart.
"you don't know?", he repeats incredulously, his tone tinged with disbelief. "after everything, you don't know? don't lie to me, y/n."
your throat tightens as guilt washes over you, but you try to stand your ground. "i just... i couldn't do it anymore," you confess, voice trembling with emotion.
"couldn't do what?", he presses, his frustration mounting with each passing moment. you know he doesn't believe you, dead set on getting the answers he deserves. he's driving slowly now, allowing him to turn his head in your direction more often.
"this!", you exclaim but immediately recoil when you see the look of hurt flash in his eyes. "no! not this, i mean- me! it's my fault, you did nothing wrong." you're saying all the wrong things, but you're too overcome with emotion to attempt to form a coherent sentence. still, you know it's time that the truth came out, so you continue to explain with a heavy heart.
"i didn't mean to hurt you," you choke out, and your voice is so thick you have to swallow before you carry on. he looks indignant and rightfully so, but you go on before he can interrupt you again. "but i was so scared, jaehyun."
his expression softens at your state, replaced with a mixture of sadness and resignation. "scared of what?", he asks quietly, his words hanging heavy in the air. you feel the need to pause for a moment, hands balled into tight fists as you try to regulate your breathing. you really didn't take into account how debilitating the night would be on yourself. sure, you knew it was going to be tough seeing jaehyun again, especially if he agreed to pretend to be together, but you weren't really expecting to hash it out like this, the weight of your decision pressing down on your like a leaden blanket.
the car moves so slow it may as well be still but when you turn to him, you can feel the burn of jaehyun's gaze, his eyes searching for some semblance of understanding. "i loved you", he whispers, voice cracking with the intensity of his words. "i would've done anything for you."
you're still, you're so so still. tears threaten to spill from your eyes as you struggle to find the right words to say, but he's completely thrown you off. the car has slowed to a stop, engine idling before he eventually turns it off in favour of turning to you.
"that's exactly why," you reply weakly, your voice a fraction of the volume it normally is. he surveys you intently, his expression a mix of confusion and hurt, eyes reflecting the very same sadness you feel.
"what do you mean?"
"i was scared of hurting you," your confession does nothing to ease his confusion, but you can see he looks more shocked than anything now. "scared of hurting me?," he echoes, his uncertainty and disbelief palpable. "this is so ironic, it's almost funny..."
you think hearing any more of what he has to say is actually going to kill you internally, so you know you have to rush to explain before he starts giving you a piece of his mind again. "i know, it's so fucking stupid, jaehyun", your voice is trembling from the sheer guilt you feel, bottom lip quivering so much you have to bite it to get it to stop. "everything was going so perfectly, you were so perfect, and it scared me so much."
he falls silent, much to your relief, his expression even softening minutely as he processes your words and this gives you the encouragement to continue. "remember that night on the beach? on the trip last year?", you speak tentatively, wanting him to understand your thought process and the tangled mess of emotions swirling inside you at the time, though it's not much of a defense. the memory floods into your mind so vividly, and you can see it all; the salt in the air, the gentle breeze, the feeling of the sand, your intertwined hands swinging. it was so serene and you'd give anything to be there in that moment again, though it's nothing but a distant dream now.
he nods slowly without speaking, and you release a wet sort of laugh, feeling like you'd choke on the lump in your throat. "we talked about everything that night, our families, our childhoods, our futures...and then you brought up what would happen after we graduated college."
you know he remembers because his eyes light up with recognition and he looks like he's replaying that exact moment in his head, and you hope he remembers it with the same soft, gushy feeling you do. "you said you wanted to move in together, and don't get me wrong, i was thrilled, but it made me realise how...serious everything was, you know?", your voice catches in your throat and you're talking to yourself as much as you're talking to him and he seems to understand that, because he makes no attempt to stop you.
it's silent again for a bit as you two reminisce, but you break it again. "i just knew i was going to fuck up, jaehyun. maybe not right away, but eventually, and the thought terrified me," you sniffle a little, not being able to bring yourself to look up from your hands to meet his gaze. "that feeling never really went away, and it was eating me up from the inside. it got so bad that i had convinced myself that you were going to leave me, so i had to do it first, before i fucked up."
your sorrowful confession hangs in the air like an echo and you finally give in to the urge to look at him, and you're shockedâ he looks at you so carefully, his expression soft, much, much softer than before. you couldn't stop the tears from finally falling if you tried , the soft glow of the dashboard illuminating the contours of your now wet face. your shared eye contact makes you feel nervous, but not in the way you were expectingâ it's too gentle, too raw and it makes you feel a certain way.
"i know it's not an excuse," you're blubbering so much that your cheeks feel hot, you're practically falling apart in the passenger seat of jaehyun's car while he watches and lets you pour all your miseries out onto him. "you don't know how much i regretted it...but i thought i did the right thing. for the both of us. even though i just ended up doing what i was trying to avoid by hurting you."
it's too much now, jaehyun's too silent, and too not-angry for your liking; why is he looking at you in a way that makes you feel like he doesn't think you're the worst person in the world? you can't hold back the sob that's building in your chest, doubling over in favour of pressing your hands against your face and bawling into them. you're not too loud a cryer, but the tremors of emotion you feel are making your shoulders shake, so you're crying silently into your hands while trembling. however guarded he tries to be, the gentleness of his voice overpowers it as he speaks. "i know, shh...," he murmurs and you can't believe your ears, that the man you thought hated you is actually attempting to comfort you after everything. "breathe, y/n."
like it's second nature to him, his hand travels to your back as the sobs wrack through your body, immediately drawing soothing circles on to your covered skin with his thumb. you don't know how but this almost makes you feel worse, the fact that he's still so caring towards you. you pluck up the strength to lift your face from your moist hands, and you're sure it's not a pretty sight that greets him. your nose feels unbelievably stuffy, and your face is on fire when you meet his sympathetic eyes, the warmth from his gaze and hand spreading throughout you, even though he's now removed it. "i'm sorry," you manage through sniffles, but you think you almost flatline when he reaches his hand towards your face, ever so gently caressing it. his thumb juts out and sweeps across the skin under your eye, wiping away at the wetness. "i know."
"shh, it's okay. you're okay", he coos gently and slowly takes his hand back in favour of imitating slow breaths for you, helping you relax a little as you copy him. "why would you think i'd leave you?", he asks carefully once you've calmed down a bit and wiped your tear-streaked face, simply surveying you now. all you can offer him is a defeated shrug, attempting to collect your thoughts. "remember i told you about my ex? the very first one?"
he nods.
"i moved on obviously, like ages ago, but since then i think i've always had this idea that getting dumped is inevitable", you try to explain, voice small as he listens patiently. "it was either leave them or get left, and i was so scared that it would happen with you, that i'd fuck up so bad that you would leave. i couldn't do it."
he frowns and calls out your name in a way that sounds like he's about to lecture you, but you know he can't tell you anything that you haven't already told yourself. "i know, jae, it was so stupid, i know. i don't regret anything more", you sigh, giving him a tight, small smile when you lock eyes. "i'm sorry."
you notice his eyes soften at the nickname, releasing a quiet huff before he runs a hand through his hair. his body language doesn't carry the same anger it did before when he was ranting, now looking subdued and reflective. "i understand why you did what you did. it was stupid, but i understand", he murmurs, his voice impossibly soft when meeting your gaze, the eye contact so intense that you have to physically remind yourself not to cry again by digging your fingernails into your palms. "i would've never left you."
you nod slowly at his admission, his words hanging in the air. "i should've just talked to you...", you concluded in a sullen way and he doesn't reply in full, just mumbling a soft "yeah" under his breath. you don't mind the silence that fills the car this time, the underlying tension more or less dissipated, but you do notice the time, realising that jaehyun still needs to go back home after dropping you.
"should we, uh...", you gesture towards the road and he jumps up in his seat, as though he forgot that he was driving you somewhere in the first place, muttering "sorry" before twisting the key to start the car. this makes you let out an involuntary giggle and jaehyun shoots you a quick glare which immediately shuts you up, a certain warmth blooming in your chest when you see a small smile creep on to his face out of the corner of your eye.
it's quiet for a bit, jaehyun focusing on the road while you gaze out the window. much to your dismay, both the road and the various buildings and shops start to look a lot more familiar, indicating that you are nearing your home. you shouldn't be dismayed really, because this wasn't the most congenial of car rides, but it means that your time with jaehyun is coming to an end. you don't know what the conversation that took place means for you and him however, because unless you're alarmingly stupid, you feel that he may not hate you as much as he once did. does this mean you might even be able to see him again sometime? in a setting where you're not sweating and shaking at just the thought of seeing him?
you think it might be a bit audacious of you to ask that, so you don't. instead, you turn to him with a light grin, playing with the necklace clasped around your neck. "hey, at least you got some new headphones out of all of this", you joke lightheartedly, eyeing the package sitting on the backseat. he lets out a heartwarming chuckle at your comment, glancing at the bag through his rear view mirror. "i can't believe your parents bought that for me. you think they'll make me return it when they find out we aren't together?", he remarks, and you do your best to ignore the little pang you feel at the reminder of your situation. his comment does make you snort though, and you nod along with him. "nah, you need it more than anyone. your airpods have seen better days."
he laughs again, and you wouldn't believe that you two were arguing back and forth like madmen some twenty minutes back. this feels familiar and comfortable, and you cross your fingers in case you jinx it. "do you remember that time when we planned a picnic..." jaehyun begins, a sense of nostalgia shining through his cheeks. "and you forgot to bring the speakers? and we tried blasting music through my one airpod?"
you can't stop the peals of laughter that escape from your mouth as you nod, covering your mouth when your snort makes him laugh as well. "remind me why we didn't just play the music straight from your phone?", you question, replaying the memory in your mind like it was recent. he pauses to think for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck while he hums. "yeah, what the fuck? why didn't we just do that?"
you're laughing in unison as you take this trip down memory lane together, the next few minutes of the car ride consisting of exclamations of "oh! remember when..." and "that time when...", both of you adding on to the memories with your own perspectives and insights. the fact that the conclusion of your little dispute remains ambiguous doesn't bother you too much at the moment, happy to just enjoy the warm atmosphere while you can.
jaehyun's animatedly recounting a story about your sister downloading a game on his phone when you face him, and the last thing you remember paying attention to was that she had somehow managed to spend a large amount of his actual money on it. your eyes are focused on him now, just studying him, and he seems to realise that you aren't listening to his story when he glances at you.
"what?", he questions, the corner of his eyes crinkling when he narrows them at you in an playful manner, taking one hand off the steering wheel to drum absentmindedly on his thigh. "nothing, i just...", you trail off, scanning his features. "you changed your hair. it's...nice. i wanted to tell you that earlier."
he clearly wasn't expecting the compliment, mouth opening and then closing as he tries to think of an admissible reply. "you like it?", he then asks, a shy smile tugging at his lips when he consciously cards his fingers through the longer bit at the back. at your reaffirming nod and heavy gaze, the expected pink sheen dusts his cheeks and though you can't see them, you know the tips of his ears are pink too. he mumbles something of a timid "thank you", both of you smiling like idiots while he trains his eyes on the road.
not too soon after, his car is pulling into your dark driveway. you can't help the sinking feeling in your chest, lips curved slightly downwards. none of the lights are on, save for the streetlight, illuminating the street in a ghostly, dim way. your house looks just like it had for the past many months, gloomy and lonely, and you're absolutely dreading the idea of moping around once again. if this day spent with jaehyun has showed you anything, it's that you're a 100% sure you've not moved on, and that you won't for a long, long time. simply put, you're still in love with him, and you'll have to carry the cross of your mistake for some time to come.
he switches the ignition off but neither of you move. you're sat in your dull driveway on an otherwise empty street, all the other lights of your neighbouring houses off. neither of you say anything, mostly because you're not sure what one is supposed to say in this situation, so everything is still.
"soâ"
"wellâ"
you let out a nervous chuckle while he smiles a bit, both of you mumbling apologies for interrupting each other. "you go first", jaehyun compels you, but now you don't know what to say because you were just going to make it up as you speak. your mouth has a way of working faster than your brain sometimes, but neither seem to be too functional at the present moment. "no, you go", is all you got, and jaehyun has the nerve to roll his eyes, twisting in his seat a little so he's facing you.
"i was just going to say that we uh, reached your place", he claims in a deadpanned manner, but your car door is still locked and your seatbelt is still locked in. you think you must have lost your mind, hoping that he'd tell you to stay with him forever and never leave (which you would have agreed to in a heartbeat). "i guess we have...", you nod, looking out the window and observing your home. maybe it was the dread of going back to your old routine that gave you the sudden boost of confidence, but you realise he never answered your question from before.
"jaehyun...", you begin but falter when you think you might be overstepping, ultimately deciding to just ask anyway when he looks at you expectantly. "why did you agree to come today? we both know you didn't have to."
he looks like he was dreading the very question you asked for some time, shutting his eyes when he leans his head back against the headrest and sighs. "i don't know", is the answer he gives you, voice muffled through the palms of his hands that are rubbing his face tiredly. biting your lip, you have to hold back a similar sigh because you should've known he's not going to just tell you like that. you have no right to press, but yet you do, one more time. "jaehyun, please?"
maybe it's because you sound so meek, but he drops his hands in favour of looking at you, really looking at you, like he's searching your eyes. "why do you think?", he turns it back on you, but you know this is just his way of avoiding the question. "if i knew, i wouldn't be asking. i know you don't have to tell me, you don't owe me a single thing, i justâ", you speak desperately with all of the confidence you can muster, worried that your bottom lip would start trembling again. "please, i need to know."
you're looking each other dead in the eye, and while your voice isn't strong, it's honest and raw, and jaehyun can sense that. you can see that there's a million thoughts running in his mind just by the pained look in his eye and your own heartbeat has picked up, the sound deafening in your ears.
"if you haven't figured it out by now, i don't know what to tell you."
thud. thud. thud. you wonder if he can hear your heartbeat over the sound of his, but the blood pumping through your veins is making your ears ring, because what did he mean by that? you hope it means what you want it to mean, but you can't just assume you know everything because you're delusional at this point. "jaehyun, what are you sayiâ"
"i agreed because i'm still in love with you."
there it is. the silence after his confession is positively deafening, your mouth agape as your try to register what you just heard. your eyes flicker between his, searching for any signs that he's just messing you and that it's some cruel joke, though it would be completely in his right to fuck with you if he wanted. he's never looked more vulnerable, eyes trained on you in an almost frantic way, like he himself can't believe what he just said. the way he just blurted it out makes you think that he didn't fully mean to admit that, but it's out, nothing he could do to take it back.
"what?", your own voice sounds like an echo and you wish you had something else to say because you heard him loud and clear, but there's a burning ache in your chest that claws all the way up to your throat. the shock is evident in your voice, not knowing what to do with yourself as you visibly process his words. "tell me you're joking", you plead in a pained way, words barely above a whisper. he doesn't say anything, looking lost in his own thoughts as his eyes scan your face. "you don't hate me?"
"hate you?", he scoffs disconsolately, shaking his head slowly. "i couldn't hate you if i tried. and believe me, i tried."
you can hardly believe your ears. you know your heart shouldn't be pounding the way it is, it feels wrong almost for you to be feeling as relieved as you are. "after everything?", you insist dumbfoundedly, but the longing in your voice is palpable, even if you're trying to give him a way out. "i was so horrible to you, jaehyun." you hate the way your voice cracks, but jaehyun just sighs and offers you a sad smile.
"there's nothing you could do to make me hate you."
it's heartbreaking, how defeated he sounds, but he's also looking at you like you could do no wrong in his eyes. "i never moved on", you whisper, hesitance clear as you tell him the truth. "i couldn't delete any of our pictures, i still have all your clothes, sometimes i accidentally set the table for two when it's just me..."
he's blinking quickly, and if you didn't know any better, you'd say he was trying to hold back tears. your break-up did nothing but cause immense amounts of pain for the both of you, and you'd give anything in the world to make up the time lost. his wide-eyed and nearly motionless expression urges you to continue, ready to pour out your heart to the man you loved.
"i still have your number memorised", your face mirrors his, voice growing stronger by the minute. "all the gifts and letters you've ever given me, they're all still there in that shoebox in my cupboard."
"i thought about you everyday", his whisper is raspy, speaking right after you do. "every party i went to, i looked for you even though i knew you wouldn't be there. you know johnny tried setting me up with people?"
you try to suppress the little sting, but you feel it deep inside you. "he did?", you have to clear your throat, and you almost don't want to ask but you do anyway. he releases a sad little chuckle and nods, toying with his fingers. "yeah. i knew i was doomed when the whole date, i wished she was you."
the smile finds its way on to your face against your will, feeling that familiar lump make its way to your throat. "she could've made you happy, jae", you argue anyway because at the end of the day, you want the best for him, and you know you're far from the best.
"no one could make me feel the way you do, y/n", he replied honestly, and there's a sense of finality to his words, like he'd had this same argument with himself time and time again, only to come to this conclusion. âthe thought of anyone else touching you made me sickâ, he croaked, not missing the way his eyes ghost over your frame.
his words bring about a noticeable shift in the air, followed by silence. he watches you, and you watch him, breathing slow as your eyes dart across his face.âi donât want anyone but youâ, you confess slowly, and a few beats pass before you find it in you to speak again. "i love you, jaehyun."
silence.
you expected disapproval, maybe even a malicious scoff, but you certainly weren't expecting to feel a soft pair of lips against yours as he suddenly lurches forward.
you're stunned, so stunned that you don't even reciprocate the kiss, lips unmoving against his. it's only when he takes this as a sign of discomfort and breaks the kiss that you find yourself reacting, hands immediately making their way to caress his cheeks, leaning forward to chase his lips and close the distance between you. he lets out a sound of surprise against your lips but kisses you back right away, a hand wrapping around your neck from the back, tangling itself in your hair. the kiss is heated and so long overdue, tangible through the way his lips meld furiously together with yours, teeth clashing every now and then.
your hands make their way to his broad shoulders, one wrapping around them while the other comes to rest on his chest, gripping the material of his hoodie. you have the urge to be impossibly close to him, trying to lean forward to kiss him more fully but you're restricted by your seatbelt. it's almost as if he can read your mind, because the hand placed against your face now moves to press on the buckle to release you without breaking the kiss. "fucking seatbelt...", he mumbles disgruntedly against your lips, fiddling with the button until you hear it click, finally separating yourself from him to slip it over you. "there we go."
you don't stay separated for long because jaehyun uses the hand behind your head to pull you towards him again, capturing your lips in a way that makes all the air leave your lungs. "come here", he grunts, using his long arms to pull you clumsily over the gearshift and straight on to his lap. you settle yourself in to the somewhat awkward position in the enclosed space, but that's the last thing on your mind when all your thoughts consist of jaehyun, jaehyun, jaehyun. his lips are back on yours in a instance, tongue sweeping across your bottom lip messily and you gladly allow it to explore your mouth.
the air is impossibly thick, heavily contrasting to the cold weather outside the car, even his lips and hands feel warm against your hot body. you feel his hands grip your waist easily in this position, lips leaving your own to drag across the expanse of your jaw. you whine quietly at the feeling of his mouth sucking a particular spot on your neck, tilting your head back as you wrap your arms around his neck. "missed this", he muses, tongue peeking out to kitten lick at your neck, breath hot against your sensitive skin. "missed you."
the feeling in your chest when his hands find their way under your shirt and on to your bare skin is inexplicable, unable to stop the soft moan from tumbling from your lips when his big hands glide over your stomach, back and finally your breasts. everything about the way he's touching you and kissing you is greedy and urgent, like he's afraid you'll disappear from his arms if he loosens his grip even by a little bit. you'd be a fool to not match this energy, pressing into him while you squeeze your hands over his. "need you so bad, jae."
you're subconsciously grinding down against him needily, hips stuttering against his lap like you've never been touched before. "fuck", your eyes widen at the groan that leaves his throat, sounding absolutely guttural as he grips the skin of your hip harshly.
he's barely done anything and you're coming undone right in front of his watchful eyes, your panties dampening at the look on his face. "jae..", you whine when his fingers dip past the waistband of your pants, gently cupping your clothed core as you rut against it. "shit, baby", he marvels at the stickiness of your panties, feeling your wetness on his fingers just through the material. "you really missed me, huh?"
you don't even have the time to respond to his cocky remark before his fingers are slipping beneath the band of your panties to circle your clit, spreading the wetness around your folds. a breathy sigh escapes your lips, throwing your head back as he experimentally prods at your entrance and eventually slips a finger inside. "still so tight for me", he all but groans, pumping his finger in and out of you languidly, drinking in the sounds of your pleasure. he feels so blissfully familiar, and though you haven't been touched by him, or anyone for that matter for months, the stretch of his second finger feels the same kind of intimate as it did before, if not more.
you lean forward and press your lips against his once again, kissing him like you might never get the chance to again, all while you're grinding back down on his hand that's fingering you steadily with a thumb circling your clit at the same time. his free hand moves to bunch your top up above your breasts, peppering kisses over the tops of them. he wastes no time in pulling your breasts free from from their cups, attaching his lips to one nipple and swirling his tongue around it in a way that makes you cry out. "my pretty girl", he mumbles almost to himself while cupping your other breast, making a show out of it as his tongue flicks over your hardened bud over and over until your arching your back and pressing it further into his face. âthought about this all the time.â
keeping in mind that you're still technically in a public place, you bite your lip to contain the sounds of your pleasure, though jaehyun doesn't make it easy when he notices this and increases the pace of his fingers. the hand fondling your breast leaves it unattended for a moment to release your bottom lip from your teeth, smoothing his thumb over the swollen skin. "i've waited months to hear these sounds. let me hear you, baby", he all but purrs and that's all it takes for a moan to tumble out of your mouth, pressing your forehead against the side of his face while you screw your eyes shut out of pleasure.
with his attack on your sensitive buds and his fingers pistoning inside of you, you know you aren't going to last long. "already?", jaehyun chides with a small smirk, and it's embarrassing how well he knows your body, grazing his teeth against your nipple in a way that feels painful and heavenly at the same time. you can feel his rock hard bulge against you, and with the untimely grinding of your hips against him, you're sure this is torturous for him. "don't wanna come like this", you whine against his cheek, your entire body feeling sticky from the heat inside the closed vehicle. your puckered lips leave wet kisses all over the expanse of his cheek, and the boyish giggle that leaves his mouth makes your heart flutter. "wanna feel you, jae."
his head is thrown back against the headrest and his eyes are shut tightly, jaw clenched as he slowly slips his fingers out of you. though you whine at the loss of contact and you're almost grinding against the air, you want nothing more than to make him feel good as well. "want you to fill me up", you coo at him, softly linking your hands behind his neck as you test the waters with your words. it's clear they have an effect on him, both hands placed on your hips as he helps you lazily grind against his erection. "don'tâ have a condom", he grits out, hips bucking up to meet yours. "don't need one", you murmured immediately, knowing he wants this as bad as you do.
his eyes flicker open at that, one hand leaving your hip to brush some stray hairs away from your face, gently tucking some behind your ear. you could melt at the way he's looking at you, so tender and loving, a warmth spreading all over you until you feel like you have to look away. he doesn't let you however, hand quickly coming you to cup your cheek before leaning in place a small peck against your lips. "are you sure?", he sounds breathless, but still firm as his eyes glance between yours like he's reading them.
if he can read them, he'll know that you can't nod fast enough, dragging your hips across his needily to show him. "i'm sure. i want you, jae.", you're so needy that you don't even bother to take your pants or panties off fully, fingers fumbling with the waistband as you shimmy them down a little, leaving your underwear on. you swear your mouth waters when he unbuttons his pants and lets his cock spring out against his stomach, lustful eyes taking in the way he keeps his shirt up with his teeth. if this weren't such an awkward position, you'd have taken him in your mouth in an instant, knowing exactly what to do to hear the man in front of you whimper.
nudging your panties to the side, he focuses on collecting your wetness all over the tip of his dick, hissing at the contact. "please", you whine, not wanting to waste another moment, finally sighing in relief when he begins to press his cock inside you. he swears under his breath at the feeling, and you're feeling so stretched out just from him slipping it in even though you're still so wet that you just go lax in his arms until he bottoms out. "that's it", he grunts like he's holding back. "taking me so well, angel."
you preen at his praise, finally beginning to move your hips a little at his coaxing. sighing against the shell of his ear, he picks up the pace for you, not warning you before thrusting upwards to meet your movements with a groan. you can feel your mind going blank at the sensation, your moans sounding more like cries whenever he snaps his hips into yours, the obscene sounds filling the car. you're just so full, his hands gliding up and down your sides as he fucks deep inside you, making up for all the lost time. "you feel so good, baby", he barely gets his words out, but it gives you the encouragement to bounce up and down on his thick cock a little faster than before, his eyes widening at the feeling. "just like that."
he's kissing and sucking all over your neck again, lips ghosting over whatever skin he can reach and it's all so much, feeling a single tear stream down your face. he almost slows down for a second when he feels the tear drop on to his own face, eyebrows raised in surprise because he thinks he's hurting you, but he's even more shocked when you let out the high-pitched whine. "what's wrong, angel?", he mumbles into your neck, peering up at you carefully. you shake your head profusely, continuing to grind down on his cock. "i just- just love you so much, jae", you blabber incoherently, so wet that you're practically gushing around his dick.
"aw, baby", he shushes you sweetly, pressing his forehead against yours as his thrusts become more and more erratic. "i'm here. not going anywhere." the coil in your stomach is tightening and you can feel every inch of him inside you, more tears threatening to spill from your eyes before he's kissing them away. "i'm here."
he's hitting all the right spots inside you in this position, and he's basically doing all the work because you're like putty in his strong arms, all you can do is moan and cry out against him weakly. "i'm close", you warn him, but you know he already knows that, and you know he is too, slipping your hand down to where his rests on your hip and interlacing your fingers. "me too, pretty", he sputters through his teeth, giving your hand a tight squeeze as you start to come undone. âwant you to cum. can you do that for me?â
"oh my god", you're crying out as you cum around his cock, body and mind going numb and ears ringing as the coil finally snaps. "cum inside me, jae, please", his eyes go wide at the way you're begging him, and he doesn't look like he can hold back much longer. "fuck angel, you- you sureâ"
"yes, please, need you to fill me up", you cut him off, too sensitive from the way he's helping you ride out your high to move anymore. with a few more sloppy thrusts, his cock is twitching inside you before you lets out a guttural groan, his warm cum filling you up. you go limp against him, face nuzzled into the crook of his neck as the both of you try to regulate your heartbeats.
the sounds of your heavy breathing fills up the car along with jaehyun's soft murmurs of "so perfect" and "did so well for me". any doubts you had in your mind of this being a mistake in jaehyun's eyes are wiped away when he begins petting your head, gently smoothing your messy hair as he presses firm kisses to your head. his cock softens inside of you but he makes no move to pull out, wrapping his arms around your waist while you do the same around his neck, simply sitting in each other's presence silently.
you struggle but finally pick yourself up, gazing at his moonlit face from your place on his lap. âyou okay? was that okay?â, he murmurs softly, his voice thick and eyes hazy as he traces little shapes on your back. âmore than okayâ, you reply tiredly, pressing your lips against his once again because you feel youâre in a dream-like state right now. you're sure he's the most beautiful man you're ever had the privilege of looking at, feeling incredibly vulnerable when you speak again even though he's looking at you with nothing but love in his eyes. "now what?", you question, suddenly feeling like you've jumped the gun when he opens his mouth to say something but stays silent. "never mind, don't answer that, we'll talk about it later", you shake your head, laughing a little breathlessly when he grins at you, pecking his forehead sweetly.
you look away from him and at your lifeless house, mouth working faster than your brain once again. "would you...want to come in?", you wince, feeling kind of stupid for asking but meaning it anyway. you're both comforted and thrilled when a large grin is plastered on to his face, feeling like maybe your home won't be as lifeless anymore.
"i think i'd love to come in."
#nct x reader#jaehyun x reader#jaehyun#jaehyun angst#jaehyun smut#nct angst#nct oneshot#nct smut#nct fic#nct fluff#nct scenarios#nct au#nct imagines#nct reactions#jaehyun fluff#jaehyun fic#jaehyun drabbles#jaehyun scenarios#jaehyun au#jaehyun oneshot#jaehyun imagines#jaehyun timestamps#kpop#kpop smut#kpop angst#kflixnet#nct 127 smut#nct 127 angst#nct 127 x reader#nct 127 fic
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¡:*¨༺ âąâŽâą ༻¨*:¡ ¡:*¨༺ âąâŽâą ༻¨*:¡ ¡:*¨༺ âąâŽâą ŕźť
roommate!geto who you are weary to move in with at first, but as soon as you meet him you feel perfectly comfortable- like youâve known each other for decades~
roommate!geto who insists on calling you âbabyâ and âdollâ all the time
roommate!geto who you cuddle up with in your shared living room every thursday night to watch movies~
heâs already sitting on the couch with open arms when you come out to the shared space, âwhatâre we watching today baby?â
roommate!geto who has to excuse himself for a minute (or two) when he sees you walk out of you room in sleep shorts that expose the curve of your ass and a tank top with no bra.
roommate!geto who gets hard whenever a sex scene comes on, he knows you can feel his length pressing against your back, but the fact he knows you can feel it turns him on more~
roommate!geto who always sneaks touches. <3
nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck while you âplatonicallyâ cuddle during the movie. taking in the scent of your freshly lotioned skin~
grabbing your waist to guide you when youâre at parties, shielding you from any boys that might be around,
pressing his hips against yours whenever he stands behind you,
tucking loose strands of your hair behind your ear mid conversation.
roommate!geto who drives you everywhere- he doesnât mind because he loves spending time with you <3
roommate!geto who you give little fashion shows before you go out clubbing with your friends. âyou look beautiful dollâ
roommate!geto who despite loving your outfit canât stop thinking about how some guy might hit on you at the club
roommate!geto who cannot shut up about you to satoru~
roommate!geto who starts taking up skirt pictures of you to show satoru what has him going crazy-
¡:*¨༺ âąâŽâą ༻¨*:¡ ¡:*¨༺ âąâŽâą ༻¨*:¡ ¡:*¨༺ âąâŽâą ŕźť
a/n: ok i finally got the courage to get this out of my drafts. pls lmk if itâs actual shit đ
also i didnât proofread or anything so there might be mistakes- sorry again!
#ari-sa#geto smut#geto suguru#geto suguru smut#suguru geto smut#geto x reader#geto x you#geto x y/n#geto suguru headcanons#jjk imagines#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jjk headcanons#jjk suguru#jjk geto#getou suguru x reader#suggestive#suguru geto#roomie!geto
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wine or wine not | s.r
spencer reid x bau!reader
a/n: i think i love writing buildup to smut than actual smut, but i hope you guys like this lmk what you think. this was requested with the prompts "look at me when you come on my fingers" and "muttering compliments kissing down their body" and it was so much fun to write aaaaahh, my requests are open so please send more!!! guidelines in pinned <3
summary: you're hopelessly pining after spencer at a rossi party, and when you run into him in the kitchen when you're getting a refill and he asks if you want to explore the mansion with him, who are you to say no?
cw: 18+ minors dni pls, fingering, p in v, nipple play, soft!dom!spence, spencer being ridiculously hot its criminal, ooc penelope but it was for the plot, pining idiots, wine cellar sex wine cellar sex wine cellar sex, public sex, morgan and prentiss being dumb, rossi being a smug lil shit, a dumb ass title sorry i didn't know what else to name it lol
wc: 4.1k
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these days rossi was always finding some reason to throw a party at his mansion. youâre not exactly sure what it was tonight, a birthday? an anniversary? regardless, you and the team appreciated the excuse to unwind, dress up, and have non murder related fun.
the sun is setting over the rolling hills the mansion is perched on, and youâre sat at a table with the girlsâ penelope, jj, and emily discussing penelopeâs latest dating escapade. youâre trying hard to pay attention, you really are, but it proves to be difficult when youâre focused on the man showing magic tricks to the kids across the room.
you look on yearnfully as spencer pulls a coin from jackâs ear, all the kids are laughing and cheering and he has the biggest smile youâve ever seen.
âhellooo?â penelope waves a hand in front of you dramatically, âiâm getting to the good part and youâre off in space!â
you jolt back to the present, âsorry pen, iâm listening i promise. so he shows up to your door with maple syrup and feathers?â
âYES, anyways so then heâs like i have a proposition for youâŚâ penelope continues her story but you canât help but zone out again. your eyes drift back to boy genius as he finishes another trick for little henry before rising up to his full height. itâs in that moment his eyes meet yours and softens as he offers you a small wave.Â
you return the gesture back which causes the girls at your table to look in the same direction and they come to a glaring conclusion too quickly.
âah, thatâs why youâre not paying attention. too busy ogling mr. houdini over there.â jj remarks.
âi am not!â you scoff.
âoh you so are,â emily says, âwhen are you going to let yourself feel your heartâs full content.â
âfirst of all, i canât stand you. second of all, itâs not worth it. he would never feel the same about me.â you say as emily rolls her eyes.
this time penelope interjected, âoh donât be so cynical. you havenât even tried how could you even know?â
but you did know. itâs not that spencer didnât like you, he treated you the same as any team member, but that was just it. you wanted him to see you as more. during cases you would try to impress him or make breakthroughs in the hopes he would tell you âgood jobâ. a couple times you brought him coffee when you got yours, just to hear him say your name and thanks. work conversations rarely seemed to move past small talk, but youâre a little sure thatâs on your part because he just made you so nervous. and like, heâs a profiler. so youâre sure to some degree he knows how you feel, and it just makes you regress into your safe hole even further because you think heâs being nice by not acknowledging it and saving you the embarrassment.
the girls knew about your harbored crush for a month now, since the last bau drinks night you got a little too truthful during truth or dare. you were much younger in comparison to your colleagues, so they offered their sympathies at your unrequited love and tried to get you to come out more and let loose.
which is one of the reasons youâre sitting in rossiâs living room, wine glass in hand, as morgan recounts the craziest date hes ever been on. the other reason, which you wouldnât admit to anyone, was so you could admire your (not) lover from an acceptable distance and not risk embarrassing yourself.
so here you are, two glasses deep, rising up from your spot on the floor telling everyone youâre going to get a refill. your heels click against the hardwood floors all the way to the kitchen where you just so luckily run into the (your) man of the hour.
âhi.â
you were looking down at your feet as you walked to the kitchen, your head snapping up to meet the voice, âhi spencer.â you said softly.
âif youâre looking for more wine, i think emily just grabbed the last bottle,â you must have outwardly deflated as he continued, âthat bad out there?â
âonly so much wine can get me through penelopeâs sexcapades and derekâs crazy one night stands.â you joke.
he chuckles back, âoh i know, why do you think iâm hiding out in here?â
you laugh again before an uncomfortable yet strangely comfortable silence falls between you both. unknowingly you both take turns gazing at each other, indexing the others features as if this moment would be the only chance you got.
youâre about to take your loss and leave when spencer speaks up again, âyou know, i wouldnât put it past rossi to have a secret wine cellar somewhere.â
âhonestly, youâre probably right. what kind of italian just runs out of wine.â
spencer pauses slightly before saying, âdo you want to see if we can find it?â
you look at his eyes again and catch a glint of mischief? concern that youâre wine-less? whatever it is, you take the bait.
âiâm game.â
â
rossiâs mansion was humongous. it was well known that he was loaded from his years in the bureau and multiple book deals, but holy shit, the rooms just seemed never ending, and none of them were a wine cellar.
âi donât know spence, i'm starting to lose hope, and debating to revoke rossiâs italian card.â
youâre both in one of the many studies and are about to leave to find another room, when spencer notices a smaller door next to the study. he slowly opens it and peaks inside to find a descending wooden staircase. he looks at you with a smirk, âi think we just found it.â
he holds the door open and gestures you to enter first, following shortly behind you as he shuts the door. he makes sure to check that itâll still open even after itâs shut, and you both relax a little seeing it still unlock. you move down the stairs, gripping the handrail and praying you donât trip over your heels and fall to an embarrassing demise.
spencer descends a step behind you, trying so hard not to let his eyes wander down your bare back to the curve of your hips. once he steps off you both go in opposite directions to explore. you take in the vast amount of shelves and wine racks, taking note of how it seems to be separated by year and by type. running your fingers over the labels, youâre intrigued by a shelf with the year you were born, and pause in front of it. you reach up to a shelf that is just a smidge taller than you, hoping to grab the neck of an old wine bottle.
even in your heels youâre struggling, attempting little hops to try and reach. youâre about to give up when you feel a warm hand on your right hip, while an outstretched arm on your left seamlessly grabs the bottle and brings it down to you, âcareful sweetheart, donât wanna break that pretty head of yours.â spencer says lowly.
excuse me, what the fuck did he just say.
you inspect the bottle he so kindly brought down for you, but itâs a futile effort. you canât even remember why you wanted to see it. all you can think about is your hands clamming up, sending threats to the wine bottle itâs holding. your mind is fogging up fast, and youâre trying to order your brain to say something instead of going mute while heâs still an inch behind you. with his hand on your hip still.
âoh god,â you start shakily, âyou scared me spence.â you angle your body to the left so you can attempt to show how unbothered you are and look at his face.
good save (not).
heâs staring down at you with a hint of a smirk on his lips, like heâs keeping a secret from you. his eyes are intently focused on you when he speaks again, âjust didnât want you to get hurt. sâall.â
with his close proximity, youâre sure he can hear your heart beating through both of your chests, hell it was so loud they could probably hear it upstairs. heâs still got you caged in front of him when he continues, âany particular reason for this bottle?â
âyeah no, i just, wanted to see what bottles of wine he had from the year i was born.â you answer, watching as spencer moves back to give you space when you turn to face him.
he nods, âdid you know that wine is associated with the greek god dionysus?â
âno i didnât, actually.â
âitâs really interesting,â he moves forward a tiny inch, âthey call him the patron god of wine, but a lot of people often forget that heâs also the god of fertility and ecstasy.â
oh. âecstasy?â you whisper confusingly.
âyes, he believes when you drink wine it gives you emotional and physical pleasure.â
âhow does that even work?â you nervously laugh.
spencer reaches his arm above your head, never breaking eye contact, and grabs two wine glasses by their stems, âyou wanna find out?â
with only so many words, you give another nod. he uncorks the bottle with ease and pours out two glasses, with his having a little less than yours, most likely due to his slow but steady return to drinking casually. clinking your glasses, you take a big gulp hoping itâll satiate the building nerves. but youâre watching the way his fingers wrap around the glass, his veiny hand showing prominently and youâre unable to focus on anything else.
âyou know, iâve been running something of an observation the last few months.â
you take another small sip, starting to feel less nervous, âoh yeah, what about?â
âyou.â
it took everything in you not to spit your drink out all over his suit.Â
âme?â
he nods after another sip, âiâve been watching you, and not in a creepy way i swear. but iâve been keeping track of your habits; how you take your coffee, your tells when a case gets too much, things like that,â
that didnât seem overtly terrible to you, you knew spencer was an observer of his environment, always seeking out patterns to aid his predictions. youâre about to speak when he cuts you off.
âiâve also been noticing how you seem to change, when iâm in your presence.â
you feel like the sweat and nerves are just oozing out of you at this point, and he continues his verbal taunt.
âiâve seen your breathing rate get faster,â he moves a step forward, âhow your cheeks rise with the faintest red, kind of like right now,â another step forward, âand how you try to avoid looking directly at me because you think iâll find out everything if you do.â
the room has to be at least a thousand degrees at this point, heart beating so fast itâs probably gone to the moon, and your brain just unable to have any coherent thoughts at the realization that maybe you werenât as subtle as you thought.
he takes one final step to close the gap between you and delicately places two fingers on the pulse point of your neck, âi couldnât figure out your heart rate from afar,â he pauses to count, âbut now that i know it, i can come to my conclusion.â
the air in your lungs has all but escaped, nowhere to be found. âand wh- what is your conclusion d- doctor reid?â your voice betraying you by dripping with anticipation.
âthat i make you nervous. do you agree? do i make you nervous?â he says while you feel the hot breath of his whispers ghosting on your lips.
your mouth opens to say something and then shuts, because what the hell are you supposed to say? any and all logic has left the room, but the last working neuron works to make an unthinkable conclusion of your own. there is no way.
spencer moves his fingers to grip your chin between them, guiding your face to look directly into his copper eyes, âi asked you a question angel, do i make you nervous?â
youâre cornered, ây- yes.â
âwhyâs that?â
âspencer..â
âis it because youâre thinking of me the same way i think i about you?â his thumb starts tracing the outline of your lower jaw. heâs pressed right up against your chest, his other arm covertly moving to snake around your waist. the way you lean in subconsciously towards him, paired with your silence is all the confirmation he needs.
the pad of his thumb traces your lower lip, dragging it downwards a little. thereâs a hitch in his breath when his eyes flicker from your lips back up to meet your eyes again. he quietly mumbles, âcan i?â
your eyes widen slightly, relishing in the way his arms are holding you firm and steady. this was about to really happen. youâd been pining after him all this time, believing you were destined for unrequited love. but as spencer stands in front of you, looking at you as if heâd been poisoned and the only antidote is your lips, you canât help but wonder if thereâs been a similar weight on his side thatâs been holding him back too.
so you nod once again, and trust your voice this time,Â
âyes.â
youâre fully expecting him to go into it full force, and kiss you like a man starved. but he lets the premonition bubble for a little longer as he so agonizingly leans down and closes the gap, teasing you with the ghost of his lips on yours without making contact. he waits a moment, and just as he predicted your subconscious betrays you again and you impatiently lean up in an attempt to meet your lips together. spencer canât help but smile before he softly pressed himself against you.
the feeling of his mouth on yours is something you can only describe as cosmic, like a star exploding into a supernova, emitting a powerful and luminous show of energy. itâs all consuming, the light reaching every neuronal end of your body and electrifying it ten times over. your hands reach up to tangle in his curly hair and he lets out the faintest whimper, spurring you on to grab it more earnestly.
spencer loses all restraint. his hands begin furiously mapping out your body, running up and down your back, reaching down to grasp a handful of your ass. he moves his hands down further to grip your thighs, effortlessly lifting you to sit on the counter behind you. spencer slots himself between your legs and continues kissing you, his mouth marking a hot trail to your neck as he mutters between, âis this okay?â
âplease donât stop.â you moan softly.
his fingers move to deftly slide the straps of your dress off your shoulder, mirroring the movement on the other side while continuing to work his down your neck. he slides the dress far enough down to expose your chest, immediately taking the swollen nub into mouth and running circles around it with his tongue. you let out a sharp gasp at the sudden warmth, whimpers leaving your throat. he repeats the motion to the other one as you cradle his head closer in an attempt to keep him there, as if spencer had any plans of leaving.
he moves his mouth back up to meet yours again, in a lust filled attack sending shock waves straight to your core. you move your fingers to work the buttons of his dress shirt and spencer moves his hand further south and under the hem of your dress, something you donât notice until his thumbs are rubbing circles onto the plush of your inner thighs. it makes you falter on his last button as he pushes your legs farther apart, inches closer to where you desperately need him.
spencer looks directly into your eyes as his thumbs reach up to hook onto the side of your panties and slowly move them down your legs. he groans outwardly at the resistance caused by your slickness, âall this for me, baby?â
youâre rendered speechless watching spencer and his ministrations but he continues, âyou are so goddamn beautiful, you know that?â his fingers are less than an inch away from your cunt, âi see you walk around the office in those tight pants, your hair and makeup all done, and those blouses jesus,â he reaches your entrance and dives in to collect your wetness, you brokenly moan as he begins to spread it all over. âcouldnât tell if you hated me for the longest time.â
âc- could never hate you.â you whine.
âi know baby,â he slides his middle finger into your hole, âjust imagine the fun we couldâve had if we figured this out earlier. but itâs okay, we have all the time now.â he sets a steady rhythm before inserting his ring finger, actively working you towards a barreling orgasm.
âspencer, fuck, oh god.â
âyouâre so fucking wet, bet youâre gonna come soon, right? gonna make a mess on my hand?â he baited.
youâre in shambles, one hand deathly squeezing onto one shoulder the other turning white from the grip you held on the counter. the moans wonât stop falling out of you, he works his fingers so skillfully within you itâs impossible to hold any resolve when he curves upwards and hits that spot.
your head tilts back, reeling from the intense pressure coil building inside you, the peak about to hit you any moment now. spencer uses his free hand to move your head back down, âlook at me when you come on my fingers.â
that was all it took for the white hot to ravage through you, engulfing every sense and leaving you breathless. he continues moving his fingers through your orgasm, watching as you come back down to him. you donât waste a second reaching for his belt to unfasten it, slipping your hand down to palm him through his boxers. he moans in your ear as he feels you slip inside, your small hand moving up and down, and getting impossibly harder when you take your hand back up to spit on it to then return to your movements.
you take the moment to lean into his neck and leave bites of your own, finding his sweet spot right behind his ear and sucking hard. spencerâs hands have taken a spot on your lower back beneath your dress, pressing so hard with his fingertips you know thereâll be evidence of this night tomorrow.
âspence..â you mutter in the crook in the neck.
âyeah baby?â he whispers back.
âcan you fuck me now?â
he preens at your boldness, and wastes no time pulling his pants and boxers down enough to fully free himself. he pulls you closer to the edge of the counter before pulling his length out and giving it a few strokes. he lets it glide between your folds, gathering your wetness as lubricant as it hits your clit. both of you are panting hard realizing the anticipation has led to this moment. spencer positions himself at your entrance, never breaking eye contact with you, and watches your face drop into a perfect âohâ as he pushes in.
spencer is absolutely wrecked as he hears your breathing pick up, reveling in the vice grip your cunt has on him. youâre no better above him as youâve broken eye contact to stare at where the two of you connect, watching as he disappears into you and the feeling of being so full overtakes you and youâre letting out soft expletives. he bottoms out and stalls for a minute, waiting for you to signal that youâre okay for him to move. in the time heâs waiting, he takes a moment to really look at your face, how absolutely ruined you look, your cheeks are deeply flushed, hair flying in every direction, and he canât help but tell you, âyou look so pretty.â
your eyes soften as you gaze back at him and nod slightly, and he pulls back all the way to ease in again experimentally. once he hears you moan out loud at the movement, and feels you tighten even more around his cock, he loses any and all restraint heâd been holding onto this entire night.
his hips pick up the pace in harsh snaps to your core, sending ripples of pleasure all over you. your arms are wrapped around his neck attempting to pull him impossibly closer to you, âspencerâŚfuckâŚâ you drawl with a whine.
âi got you baby, gonna take good care of you, promise,â he says back in between grunts. the sentiment causes you to squeeze on his cock again as he attempts to continue, âif you keepâŚfuckâŚkeep squeezing me like that iâm n- not gonna last long.â
one hand in his hair and the other leaving dark red scratches on his back, you feel your second orgasm of the night hastily creep up on you. he can tell youâre close and quickens his pace as he thumbs your clit. you moan his name out once more before reaching your peak, feeling like your body is on fire as he continues to fuck you through it.Â
spencer feels his own release building up, âwh- where should i..?â
âinside, iâm on the pill just please come inside me.â
it was more than enough for spencerâs movements to stutter as he released his hot load in you, groaning out loud as he finished.
he slows to a half, still hilted inside of you but softening post orgasm. youâre both breathing heavily as you look up at each other and take in the otherâs fucked out faces. spencer presses a chaste kiss to your forehead before resting his own on it, âthat was..â
âintense,â he quirks his eyebrows at you, âin a really really good way.â you add quickly.
he smiles down at you, âi wasnât kidding, what i said earlier. i think about you an embarrassingly high amount each day. iâd love to take you out and make this a real thing.â
âyeah?â you gape incredulously, âthought i was the one embarrassing myself if you were able to notice all those things i did when you were near me.â
he laughs, âno, no it was endearing, definitely made it easier to be as forward as i was tonight knowing you wouldnât freak out.â
youâre about to respond when you hear the door to the cellar open, youâre both hidden from view but know itâs only a matter of seconds before someone catches you. you both look at each other in panic as spencer pulls out of you, tucking himself back in and zipping up his pants. you grab your panties from the floor and begin to pull them up your legs when he notices his come dripping down your thighs. he swiftly gathers the release on his fingers and shoves it back inside you, causing you to let out a near pornographic moan as he pulls up your underwear all the way.
âdid you guys hear that?â a voice sounding like emily said.
âsee this is why i donât do big houses like this, too many creepy ass noises.â morgan.
âmansion,â rossi corrects, âand for a couple of profilers, you both are stupid if you donât know what that sound was.â
your eyes widen to match spencerâs, youâve been caught.
âwas it a mouse or something?â
âno more like, bunnies,â he joked with an innuendo, âcome on, i found the bottle i was looking for, let the bunnies do their thing so they can leave and go home to do whatever it is bunnies do.â
âyouâre a weird old man davidâŚâ emily muttered.
the door closes and you both let out a big breath, and burst into a fit of laughter, âhow the hell are we gonna show our faces to him on monday?â you whine.
âthat is a monday us problem,â he starts, âbut right now, i think itâs time for me to take you home.â he winks.
two stuffed bunnies show up on yours and spencerâs desk on monday. youâre both redder than a tomato as rossi chuckles when he walks by. prentiss and morgan are still confused.
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid smut#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x you#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds#dr spencer reid#spencer reid x fem!reader smut#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x fanfiction#bau team#criminal minds fanfiction#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x fem!reader#matthew gray gubler#mgg
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do you believe me now? | 2
in which fem!reader is feeling insecure about how inexperienced she is around spencer's friends and seeks his expertise to amend the problem
series masterlist
18+ (smut) warnings/tags: inexperienced reader, oral f receiving, (MUNCH!SPENCE RETURNS), fingering, (very) insecure reader, softdom!spencer, sub reader, nipple stuff, kinda sorta implied age gap, god i'm probably forgetting things pls lmk if i missed something important a/n: i've been laboring at this bad boy every day for so long i had to immediately post once it was completed lol. there will be a part three ... maybe i already started it ..... anyway i love u guys and i hope this is a satisfactory part two!! PLS lmk if you liked it!! hearing from u makes my day :')
When Spencer dropped you off at Penelopeâs apartment for your first girlâs nightâthe hostess had promised you, JJ, and Emily lots of gossip sans 'icky men'âyou had been ecstatic. You wouldnât stop rambling to him about how excited you were.Â
When he picks you up two and a half hours later, he can hardly get a word out of you.Â
Itâs not his fault, of courseâwell, not really, anyway. Itâs just that all the girls had wanted to talk about was sex. A topic on which you held very little expertise and had essentially nothing to contribute. Out of the four, you were the only non-FBI agent, the youngest, and undoubtedly the least experienced. It was like high school all over again, except you actually desperately wanted to impress Spencerâs friends. All in all, you weaseled your way out of sharing without giving away that you were still very much a virgin. Sure, you could have said âwe did hand stuff two weeks agoâ, but you had a feeling these women wouldnât consider that very impressive.Â
But you canât easily relay that information to Spencerâeven when he immediately picks up on your sullen mood. He asks you whatâs wrong as you make your way down the echoey staircase, but you hold back, muttering something along the lines of weâll talk about it later.Â
Later doesnât come on the sidewalk outside. It doesnât come in the car, or at any point during the twenty minute drive, but you feel it rapidly approaching as you climb the stairs to Spencerâs apartment. He unlocks the door and holds it open for you, doesnât speak as you kick off your shoes and wander aimlessly into the living room.
âDid you eat?â He finally asks, hanging his keys on a hook by the door and glancing over to where you linger in the center of the room like a ghost.Â
âNot hungry.â
You both know that wasnât the question, but he lets it go.Â
âAlright... well, I was thinkingââ
âWhy havenât we had sex?â
The question flies from your mouth before you can stop it. It tastes like metal and you wish you could take it back as you stand there, cheeks hot and awaiting a reply. It seems youâve thoroughly astonished Spencer as he gapes at you like a fish out of water for several silent moments, eventually opting to shove his hands in his pockets and shake his head at the wall as he processes the question.Â
âI⌠I donât know. We just havenât. Does that bother you?â
Suddenly your whole body feels intolerably warm. Your fingers twitch against your thighs. Of course it bothers you.Â
âDo you just not want to? You arenât attracted to me like that?â
God, you despise how fragile your voice soundsâhow much you obviously care, how insecure you clearly are. Spencer picks up on it, despite your most fervent wishing that he wouldnât, and approaches, stopping a few feet away. You stare at the span of oriental design on the floor between your feet.Â
âThatâs not at all what I said, angel. I wish you wouldnât put words in my mouth.â
âWell, then⌠say something else,â you plead quietly, childishly, still unable to meet his eyes. Prove me wrong.Â
He sighs, which does not bode well for you. You wonder if you accidentally triggered the early demise of your relationship and christ do you wish you could rewind. When he steps closer, when his hands find your arms, youâre not sure where to look. But the low, sweet tone of his voice entices you to finally meet his gaze, charmed like a snake as his eyes dart between yours.Â
âYou know thatâs not how I feel.â
You shake your head earnestly, looking up at him with wide eyes as he slowly rubs your arms.Â
âNo. No, I donât know that.â
Spencer frowns, glancing at your lips as he speaks. Itâs impossible to not do the same when heâs standing so close.Â
âBut Iâve told you. I donât understand how you couldnât know how far from the truth that is.â
You think back to two weeks agoâthe first and only time heâd ever done anything more than kiss you. A different kind of flush replaces the shameful one in your cheeks as you try to make your case and not get distracted by the memories of his hands all over you.
âSo why wonât you prove it?â
Itâd been intended to come out cool, but instead you sound a little desperate, a little out of breath as you realize you and Spencer somehow ended up so close to each other you can feel the warmth radiating from his body.Â
âIs that what you need from me? More proof?â
He speaks so lowly, his fingers press into the flesh of your arms portentously, and you think maybe youâve poked the bear one too many times. But you wonât back down nowânot when you think you might actually get what you want.Â
So you look up at him and nod, throat too dry to speak. His eyes are deceptively soft, but you donât miss the big bad something lurking just beneath the surface of the placid hazel.Â
âAnd how do you think I should prove it?â
âI told you what I want,â you whisper, speaking above your pounding heart.Â
âNot tonight, honey. Choose something else.â
âWellâthatâs not fair,â you stammer, âthe whole point is for you to want to have sex with me.â
Spencer smiles a little, tucking hair behind your ear. âI do want that. I promise you I do. But there are other things I want us to do first.â
âThen I want to do that, too! I justâI donât know what Iâm doing, and you do, and Iâm already out on a limb by asking for this much. I know this is what I want but I need you to take the lead here. I trust you, Spencer.â You top off the monologue with an imploring gazeâhoping it delivers even a fraction of the impact that his puppy-dog eyes always have on you.Â
He seems to study every square inch of your face as you wait in suspense for him to say something. At long last, his lips partâto no avail for several more seconds as he regards you.Â
When the words finally do come, theyâre an immense relief of pressure.Â
âYouâre going to promise me that youâll communicate honestly. That means telling me if we need to slow down or stop, or if you donât like somethingââ
âI promise,â you say, perhaps over-eagerly, offering him your extended little finger.Â
An incredulous smile narrows his eyes.Â
âIs this a pinky-promise?â
âIt is.â You wiggle the finger in emphasis, and he shakes his head, smiling wider as you link pinkies.Â
âI left you with Garcia for far too long.â
You shush him, disentangling your hands to cup his jaw and press your lips to his. Itâs sweet and smiley until it isnâtâuntil everything slows down like sticky molasses and his hand is ghosting over your cheek, your neck, the curve of your waist, finally substantiating itself on your hipâthe other encouraging you to tilt your head back as he deepens the kiss and you feel yourself melting under the heat of his touch.Â
The pressure of his body against yours builds until youâre forced to take a step back, and then another, and another. Without question you allow yourself to be herded toward the bedroom, walked slowly backward as he keeps kissing you and blindly trusting heâll make sure you donât run in to anything. The bedroom door clicks shut behind him, and it is in all practicality a pointless gestureâbut you find it incredibly comforting nonetheless. Â
Itâs too warm beneath your sweater and his hands are cool as they slip under the hem, sliding against the curve of your hip. Spencerâs never seen you without a shirt, you realize, as he pulls away from the kiss by only centimeters. Â
âOff?â he mutters, thumbing at the knit fabric. And while youâre far from confident, youâve certainly been making progress in this area. You help him tug it over your head without a word, noting a distinct and surprising lack of terror within yourself as you watch for his reaction to you. Hands glide slowly up your waist and you find yourself enchanted by the slight furrow of his brow, the parting of his lips. He traces down the lacy edge of your bra, skimming sensitive skin as he goes.Â
âPretty,â he murmurs. âYouâreâŚÂ so pretty.â
It seems youâve rendered him uncharacteristically prosaic. The reaction might be underwhelming if it were anyone elseâbut Spencer Reid is a man who probably knows every synonym for pretty in the English language. Looking at you, he canât think of a single one. In an odd way, itâs the highest compliment he could pay you. Your cheeks heat and your stomach flips as he drags a knuckle up the center of the cup, and you can feel it through the layers of lace and fabric. He leans forward, ghosting his lips over yours and continuing to run his fingers over the sensitive spot. âDo you know how pretty you are?â
This is one argument you will not be winningâone heâll keep bringing up at the most inopportune times until he gets his way.Â
âSpencerâŚâ
âDonât Spencer me. Iâm asking you a question.â
The words donât seem nearly as harsh as they really are when theyâre delivered velvet-soft, with his lips and hands on youâwhen heâs so deftly popping the button on your jeans and dragging the zipper down with all the quickness of a slight-of-hand. It makes it hard to focus, even harder to speak.Â
âWe have⌠we have differing views on this matter.â
Generous handfuls of your hips and ass are taken as he helps you tug down your jeans before you kick them off, now left just in your underwear.Â
âI thought I argued my point fairly well last time you were here. You didnât learn anything from that?â
âMm⌠maybe you just need to remind me.â
âOh, I think I have to,â he agrees through a smile you can only hear. Gentle fingers skim up your back and tap the clasp of your bra. âHow about this? Can we take this off?â
Any confidence from earlier crumbles and you loose a nervous humâwhich is not the enthusiastic yes youâre sure Spencer will be seeking all evening. He pulls away, features etched with the beginnings of concern and a searching gaze. Asking would be unnecessary; the words simply come tumbling out of you.Â
âWhat if you donât like how I look?â
Spencer doesnât even blink.
âThatâs not going to happen.â
How you wish you could have the same assuredness in yourself that he seems to.Â
âBut what if⌠what if youâve been with other girls who are more, likeâI donât know, justâbetter? Prettier?â
âHoney, youâreââ a sigh, a pause as he searches for the wordsâhis eyes dart up and down your form, assessing, and when he looks back up at you, theyâve cleared and softened. He pulls you a little closer, rubbing circles into your back with his thumb. âIâm not thinking about anyone else right now. Iâm not interested in anyone else right now. I already think youâre perfect, and Iâm going to keep thinking that regardless of how you look. When I look at you, Iâm not looking for things to critique. Do you understand me?â
As far as sentiments go, itâs a nice one. But the pressure of being seen still feels like an impossible burden. You whine, leaning your head against Spencerâs chest. He accepts your weight and runs his hand over your back as you look up at him.Â
âBut what if Iâm hideously deformed?â
His eyebrows raise.Â
âYouâre not.â
âBut what if IÂ am?â
âOkay. It seems like you donât feel ready yet, which is completely fine, we just wonâtââ
âNo!â you protest. âI am ready. I am. But⌠you have to promise to be nice to me no matter what. Or break up with me if you donât like what you see so I don't have to wonder.â
âYouâre ridiculous,â he says, kissing you, âand the only thing Iâm willing to promise is that Iâll think youâre perfect. Me being nice will come as a natural byproduct of that which is very different than being nice by artifice. Take it or leave it.â
A moment of hesitanceâbut itâs short-lived. This is more important than your insecurities. Spencer is more important.Â
âTake it,â you mumble against his lips. His fingers trace up the smooth skin of your back, all the way to the fabric and metal hooks on your bra.Â
âThank you.â
You wouldnât have thought Spencerâs genius would manifest in being really good at undoing the clasp of a bra, but you can truly say youâre impressed by the ease with which he does it. It falls to the floor, leaving you completely shirtless for the first time in front of him.Â
âWell?â you murmur, arms crossed defensively underneath your chest, because you understand overtop would sort of ruin the whole thing. âWhatâs the verdict?â
âYou,â Spencer manages after a momentâyou literally watch him memorizing every square inch of your bodyâ âare ridiculously beautiful.â
The way his voice gets quieter makes your stomach flip. It sounds genuine. Too genuine to be faked.Â
âSo⌠no breakup?â
It seems that the more vulnerable you feel, the less likely you are to take a compliment. Spencer, who is always seeking patterns, probably recognizes this one, and doesnât push you so hard this time. After a silent moment, he sighs and cradles your face in his hands.Â
âYouâre gorgeous. I hate how incapable you are of seeing that. Weâre going to talk about this.â
âYeah, but not right now, right?â you murmur, standing up on your tiptoes to kiss him.Â
âNot right now,â he agrees.Â
His lips are so soft and gentle against your own it feels like love, it feels like being talked down from the ledge of your own insanity. Somehow the way he strokes your hip feels more nurturing than sexual. Itâs like he has sex and chaste affection on tap, able to turn them on and off at will. Youâre happy to drown in either. Ideally, both.
After a while, his hands begin roaming farther, become bolder in their excursions over your flesh. Up, down, over your waist and ribs. Clearly Spencer had been trying to ease you into it, but you still canât hide your sharp inhalation when his thumbs graze the sensitive skin of your breasts. He pulls his lips from yours, hands splayed over your sides.Â
âSit down.â
Itâs much too gentle to be a command, but you frown.Â
âWithout you?â
âIâm not going anywhere,â he chuckles, lightly squeezing your waist. âJust sit. Utilize patience.â
You sit on the edge of the bed with an atypical reticenceâyouâre just a little too nervous for a snippy comeback. Spencer picks up on this, features softening sympathetically as he undoes his tie with nimble fingers. It lands somewhere on the bed and he leans over you, resting his weight on his fists and offering you a quick kiss. His voice is soft and designed to soothe as he speaks, mere inches away from your face, and so quiet it could only be heard at this range.Â
âAre you nervous?â Cloth from the duvet pinches between your fingers. For a moment you donât reply, dropping your head to watch when Spencer runs his hand over your thigh. âItâs okay if youâre feeling anxious, baby. We donât have to do anything tonight.â
You expel a frustrated huff.Â
âI want to. Just because Iâm nervous doesnât mean I donât want this. I can handle a little bit of anxiety.â
He hums, dropping to a crouch and inserting himself directly in your line of sight.Â
âI know you can. But you donât always have to push yourself so hard.â
âIâm fine pushing myself a little. I pinky-promised I would tell you if I wanted to stop, remember?â
âOh, how could I forget a pinky-promise?â he smiles.Â
How could you forget anything, you think, becoming flushed and silently insolent at his dulcet teasing.Â
âPlease, do something.â Itâs a whisper, brushing his lips as you lean down until youâre nose to nose. His hands are on the back of your legs.Â
âIâm working on it.â
âIt doesnât look like it.â
âYouâre smart, angel. Tell me why I've got you naked on my bed and Iâm kneeling in front of you. Where could I possibly be taking this?â
Oh, you have a pretty strong inklingâbut youâre scared to voice it and be wrong. Instead of risking it you shake your head slowly, shyly. What youâre not expecting is for Spencer to duck his head down, slide his hands up the side of your thighs and press kisses to the delicate skin there. It feels goodâbetter than youâd have thought.Â
âYou donât know?â he asks, looking up at you through burnished gold-rimmed pupils. âNo guesses?â
âNo guesses,â you agree breathlessly, hotter than you were when you had your clothes on and all the energy in your body condensed into one point between your legs. Spencer hums like heâs considering your answer, smoothing his thumbs over the soft skin of your thighs so gently it feels like burning.Â
âI donât think youâre being entirely truthful. Lie back, sweetheart.â
You do as youâre told, scooting up on the mattress and falling back on your elbows. Spencer wastes no time in climbing over you, leaving you in much the same position as the last time youâd been in his bed. The sheets feel cool against your bare skin, but he is exceptionally warm and solid over you.Â
âIâm being honest.â Lie. âI donât know what youâre going to do.â
Lips find the most sensitive spot of your neck, dancing over it torturously. The front of his shirt brushes your chest. Your thighs clamp together.Â
âI don't like being lied to. Just say it, baby. I know you know.â
âSpencer,â you whine, fists bunching the excess fabric around his waist. Warm breath condensates on the skin of your neck as he chuckles.Â
âYou donât like being teased, huh?â
âPlease, Spence,â you whisper. You notice the pattern of his breathing pause momentarily before it all comes rushing out at onceâand you catalogue that particular plea for later usage.Â
âI canât say no when you ask me like that.â
You push your fingers into his soft hair.Â
âI know.â
It was a lucky guess.Â
Heâs still for a moment, relishing the feeling of your hands in his hair, before darting up to kiss you.Â
âIâm going to use my mouth this time,â he murmurs against your lips. Though you knew that was what he intended, your heart stumbles in its perpetual march. âIs that okay?â
âWhat if IâŚâ
You trail off. This is a very intimate situation which youâre not quite sure you have delicate enough language for. Or maybe youâre just stalling. Either way, Spencer is eternally patient with you.Â
âYou need to stop worrying so much, pretty girl. Iâd love to do this for you. But itâs your call.â
âLove is a pretty strong word.â
âSometimes I think not strong enough.â
The way heâs looking down at you so tenderly, brushing hair from your face, makes you think maybe heâs not just talking about how much he would love to go down on you. Regardless, it fortifies your trust in him. Spencer is the kindest person you know. Heâs so clearly an enthusiastic giver. Why not allow him to give you this?Â
âOkay,â you breathe. âYou canâyeah.â
As usual, youâre impressively awkward, but he doesnât seem to mind. In fact, you think he not-so-secretly delights in being the one to fluster instead of the other way around. Rarely has he mentioned his past romantic and sexual exploits, but gathering bits and pieces, you assume he was a fairly late bloomer. He probably knows what itâs like to be nervous and so deeply unsure of yourself.Â
âDo you remember what you promised me?â he whispers, pressing butterfly-light kisses to your jaw. Your eyes flutter shut as his lips traverse down your neck, teeth skimming over the delicate skin while your breath catches.Â
âMhm.â
âYouâre not gonna break that promise, are you?â
His voice, soft and muffled by your skin, is the most exhilarating and disorienting high. Your entire body buzzes with anticipation, satisfied only where his lips soothe and his body presses against yours. It takes a moment for you to remember to reply.Â
âNo.â
Reward comes in the form of his thumb brushing over the peak of your breast at the same time as he murmurs, âgood girl.â
Your stomach flips at the endearmentâyou squeak and arch into him slightly. Spencerâs hand slides down your ribs as he chuckles, lips pressed just above your collarbone.Â
âYouâve never called me that before,â you shudder as he continues kissing over your neck.Â
âItâs not appropriate in most conversational contexts. But I can tell youâve always been good.â
âReally? How?â
Spencer pauses, pushing himself up to regard you with searching eyes. The places heâd kissed feel cold without him.Â
âI just can. Youâre thinking too much, baby. I need your focus on me.â
âIt is on you,â you huff.Â
You watch his expression shift minutely. He loves games. Of course heâd love playing with you. That knowledge is why youâre only partially surprised when his thumb catches on your nipple again.Â
âIs it? Youâre only thinking about how it feels when I touch you here?â
A stammering nod.Â
He toys with the sensitive flesh only a second more, amusement lighting his eyes, before dragging his hand down, down, down until itâs between your legs. Fingers trail over your clothed core, skimming the most sensitive part of you while your breath hitches. Â
âTell me how it feels when I touch you here.â
âReally good,â you admit, a heavy exhale escaping parted lips as he pins you with his gaze.Â
âReally good, right. I can make it feel even better. Do you want me to make it feel better?â
Your thighs drop fully open and he adds just a bit more pressure until youâre pushing against his hand in search of more friction.Â
âYes please.â
âThen no more questions. I need you to trust me.â
Your answer is a breathy, dreamy sighâyouâd do anything, say anything for him.Â
âOkay.â
Spencer kisses you, absorbing your noises of protest as his hand ceases between your legs and settles on your hip. But youâre trusting him. No whiny complaining. No unnecessary questions.Â
Things go much quicker once youâre not interrupting him every twenty seconds to say something. His lips reattach to your neck, retracing their path (albeit quicker) until heâs below your collarbone. You watch in rapt fascination, twisted brows and parted lips as he peppers kisses down over your breast before dragging his tongue over your nipple. A jolted little moan spills out because you hadnât been prepared to hold one in. Waves of hair fall over Spencerâs face, obscuring him from your vision, but you donât think to push it awayâyour body is too busy processing the sensation to be much use on any other front. He darts his tongue over the peaked flesh, eliciting more little open-mouthed exhalations of pleasure from you. Earlier you hadnât really thought it necessary for your bra to come offâyou had no idea this could actually feel so good. A moment later he begins toying with the other nipple and you gasp as a bolt of heat goes straight to your core.Â
You curse, further words catching in your throat as he suddenly switches, mouthing at your other breast and letting the cold air chill the other until you have goosebumps. It feels a little like hypnosisâyouâre unable to move or speak as his tongue laves over you. Soon heâs replacing his mouth with a thumb again, sucking a mark onto your tit just above your nipple. You whimper a little at the pleasant brutality of it, hoping as he releases that it wonât soon fade. Spencer swipes over the stinging skin and presses a tender kiss to it, almost like an apologyâbut you sincerely doubt heâs actually sorry.Â
Then he resumes his descent, leaving soft kisses down between your breasts, over your ribcage and stomachâwhen he reaches your hips, he doesnât pull off your underwear all at once. Rather, he slides the fabric down centimeter by centimeter, kissing the revealed skin like itâs precious.Â
This time you donât need to be told to lift your hips. He helps you slip the final piece of clothing down and off of your legs, flinging it somewhere blindly before getting comfortable between your thighs once more. Your heart pounds with arousal and anxiety as his arms wrap around your thighs and his hands rub up and down the tops of them slowly.Â
âGod, youâre fucking beautiful,â he mumbles, loosening his hold on one leg to thumb at your folds. They glisten in the dim light of his bedroom as he gently reveals your clit. A soft whine escapes you when he nudges at the aching bud, slipping over it a few times and alleviating a bit of the pressure thatâs been building. âShh, baby. I know. Iâm gonna take care of it. Youâre being so good for me.â
Fuck. The way he talks to you makes your brain turn to mushâyouâre utterly incapable of forming an intelligent thought. Spencer has rendered you a complete idiot, and youâre not upset about it in the slightest.Â
He presses more gentle kisses to the creases between your thighs, just above your clitâeverywhere except for where you need him most. Everything aches for him in the best way and at least youâre too turned on to be very insecure anymore. All you want is relief. But youâre trusting him.Â
Thankfully, he delivers.Â
The tip of his tongue grazes so lightly over your clit that if you werenât this worked up you may not have felt it at all. In your current state, however, the stimulation echoes through every atom of your being. Every muscle is tense, frozen in placeâyou canât even breathe for a second. He does it again, a little flatter, with a little more pressure, and you whimper. Itâs a delicate thing, almost pained and definitely overwhelmed as he gently begins working his tongue against you. Your head cranes up to watch, your jaw drops. Approximations of curse words try to form, but come out only as, âf-fuâoh,â so whiny and soft it doesnât even sound like you. He hums sympathetically, but you suspect it morphs into a chuckle as you continue to gasp and mewl.Â
There are times where you can hold back sounds of pleasure. When youâre by yourself, itâs typically not a problem. Two weeks ago when Spencer was knuckle deep in you for the first time, it had certainly been a challenge, and youâd pretty much given up. But thisâthis is something else entirely. It feels like religion. It feels like compulsion. Even if you had the slightest modicum of control over yourself, which you currently donât, you wouldnât want to keep quiet. You want him to know what heâs doing to you.Â
So you let every cry, every whine and whimper drag from your lungs, unbidden and unshaped. Youâre new at this, after allâevery broad lick feels so good that you have no fucking idea what do to with your hands or how to stop rolling your hips or how to censor your sounds.Â
âSpencer,â you keen in one of the moments you remember to breathe. He moans against you, taking you into his mouth and sucking lightly. Your hips buck. âOh, myâfuck!â
The hand thatâs still around your thigh rubs soothing lines up and down. The one thatâs spreading you open pulls your folds apart a little bit further, granting him more access to your clit. He flicks his tongue and you almost come then and there, vision going gray for a split second.Â
âWait, wait, Spenceââ you squeak, writhing and trying not to squeeze your thighs together for fear of hurting him. He pulls back and looks up at you, lips shining with your slick and eyes glazed with lust. Fuckfuckfuck he looks so fucking good. âPlease, just⌠slow down, or Iâm gonna⌠or itâs gonna be over.â
The corner of his mouth twitches as he rubs circles into your inner thigh.Â
âItâs over when you say itâs over. You donât have a refractory period. We donât have to stop at one.â
âOhâyou donâtâyou donât have to do that,â you stammer.Â
âI know I donât have to. But if you want me to, I want to. You taste so good, angel girl.â
Well, shit.Â
He looks absurdly sexy between your legs like this. You have no idea how you got so lucky, but you donât plan on taking it for granted. Your fingers tangle in his hair.Â
âI donât know if I can do more than one,â you admit shyly, slightly embarrassed by how little you know about yourself and in general compared to Spencer. Hazel eyes sparkle in the warm light.Â
âHow about we start with one and see how it feels?â
Your voice is breathy when you respond, âokay,â already impatient for him to get back to it. Spencer seems just as eager, immediately kissing between your legs with a passion that makes your lips jealous.Â
The flat of his tongue presses circles against you and your hips buck, already ramping up to that point youâd been at before calling a time-out. Slowly his fingers find their way to your entrance and he teases you with them, dipping in to the first knuckle before withdrawing again. If you could form words, youâd beg him to just do it already, but all you can manage is an affronted whine as you tilt your hips down, hoping he catches the meaning.Â
Of course he doesâpushing two fingers inside you at once. The intrusive stretch adds a sharp edge to the pleasure, makes it more interesting, as your brain short-circuits and you choke out a moan. It only takes a few slow pumps of his fingers in tandem with the pressure of his tongue until your hips are writhing and youâre and mewling desperately, more overwhelmed with pleasure than youâve ever been. You push his hair back, able to see him for the first time, and fully appreciate the hollow of his cheeks, the way he looks up at you with perfect, glassy half-lidded eyes, the rhythm of his hand and tongueâhe takes your clit between his lips once more, sucking lightly, and youâre done for. A pornographic sob escapes from deep within you as you come, but he doesnât stop. The orgasm lasts longer than you knew one couldâalthough, itâs only your second time, so you donât exactly have a lot of data to go off of. Your entire body feels warm and floaty, and what heâs doing feels so good you want him even deeperâbut you know he wonât give you that yet. Instead you focus on the slow burn of your orgasm, allowing him to carry on for a while until you begin slowly drifting back to earth and it becomes a bit too much. He recognizes the barely-there whine for what it is and pulls his fingers from you carefully, pressing one final kiss to your clit that makes your legs twitch and summons a weak little moan.Â
Spencerâs lips find other avenues, over the delicate skin of your thighs and hips and stomach as he slowly drags himself up again. By the time youâre face to face again youâre still breathing hard. You sort of feel like prey underneath his weight, studied so scrupulously, known far more intimately by him than anyone has ever known you before. But there is so much light and kindness in the way he looks at you that you almost canât make sense of it.Â
Maybe itâs possible to be known and still wanted. The possibility spins like a coin on its edge in your mind. An idea you spent so much time trying to nurture and is only just now beginning to sprout. Maybe someone could see you at your most vulnerable, and still find you worthy of kindness. Appreciation. Affection.Â
Spencer certainly could, it seems, as he ducks down to kiss you. You dodge it, turning your head demurely. He nudges his head against yours, speaking so, so softly, utterly cloying as he teases, âwhat? Youâre not gonna kiss me now? Is that how it is?â
âNo!â you balk, equally as quiet and especially bashful. âNot when you⌠no.â
âLet me kiss you,â he pleads, so earnestly you turn your head back to face him. His big eyes are hazy, reflecting all the warmth and dizziness you feel. âLet me kiss you. Please.â
You whine.
âI donât wanna⌠taste⌠myself.â
Spencer doesnât miss a beat.Â
âHm. Weâll need to work on that. Because one day, Iâll make you come just like that again, and then Iâm going to fuck you, and youâre really going to want me to kiss you then, angel.â
Something flickers in your core.Â
Suddenly youâre not so squeamish. You really want him to kiss you now. But it seems heâs going to have his fun, first.Â
âOpen.â Without even thinking about it, your lips part. He really ought to be careful with what he tells you to doâyouâre all too compliant. Even as his fingers slip between your lips, youâre obediently hollowing your cheeks around them, watching him with big eyes as his own mouth falls slightly open. âOh, baby,â he croons. âWhat are we gonna do with you?â
That flicker has returned to a full-fledged throbbing once you open your mouth again, slightly dizzy from lack of oxygen.Â
âCan you make me come again right now?â you whisper, grasping lightly at his shirt. He grins like he loves the ideaâand you let him have his way, accepting his lips on yours with no complaint. After a few moments, (the taste is surprisingly unobtrusive), he pulls away.
âI would love to.â
-
part three
#spencer reid#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid fic#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid fanfic#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds smut
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Part 2 to this
CW: exhibitionism, reader is HORNY ASF like rlly fkn horny, use of buttplugs and sex toys, THIS IS SO FILTHY BUT PLS LMK IF U WANT MORE WORK LIKE THIS
Taglist: @valentineofoctobers
At first it made you awkward, knowing your roommate had seen you like that, but the awkwardness turned to desire. Something carnal had possessed you as you found excuses to spend more time near him, teasing him until he snapped.
You started off tame, bending over slightly with lacy panties on, the mere display of them shown before you walked away. Then you grew more confident, wearing no undergarments as you wiped the floor down, your skirt leaving nothing to the imagination as the slit of your pussy tantalised his view, brown eyes drawn to your exposed cunt.
You grew frustrated as he expressed no need to fuck you, only offering you a longing glance and a slight view of his growing bulge before he walked away.
âSimon! Can you help me for a second?â You called out, standing on a miniature ladder to reach your top kitchen shelf.
You could hear him grumble slightly and his door shut, before heavy footsteps entered the kitchen. âWhat do you need?â
âCan you just make sure I donât fall?â You cooed sweetly, indicating to the top shelf. You watched his eye colour disappear into a shade of white as he rolled his eyes before his hands were on your hips.
You climbed up to the furthest step, slightly nervous as you wobbled, feeling around the dusty shelf. You could hear Simon breathe out deeply. A heart shaped toy was wedged in your ass, the glistening reflection of lube soaking in-between your bare pussy as your clit visibly throbbed.
You spread your legs slightly, giving him a better view of your soaked folds, thighs slightly saturated with arousal as you hummed, clenching your entrance.
âFound it!â You smiled, turning around to look at him, âCan you help me down now?â
He nodded, his hands at your hips as he lifted you onto the ground. You offered him a polite nod, patting him in on the shoulder as you walked away. Simon let out a groan, taking in the tent in his pants as he groped himself, thick cock straining against the material.
Maybe you should have stopped at that. But you didnât.
You left your door open just the slightest, an invitation, if you will. It wasnât like he hadnât seen it before.
You bared yourself from any clothing, bare tits bouncing in the air as you positioned your needy cunt over a dildo, thick silicone sheath barring your pillowy walls as you sunk down. You let out a pathetic whine, cooing into the air as you dribbled slightly before you set a growing pace.
You were loud, harsh moans sinking into the air as you fucked yourself, teasing your sweet spots with every thrust as a hand came to your clit, rubbing the nub with fervour.
Simon grew irritated listening to you. The absolute thrill in your sounds stirring his cock even more.
Your body was docile as you rode the toy, a figure 8 swirling against your sensitive jewel as you spluttered into the air, a growing orgasm approaching you. You were so needy, so desperate for it as you screamed out, head thrown back as you came, gushing onto your sheets as your tits bounced.
Simonâs foot steps were heavy as he threw open the door, eyes wild as he took in your panting figure.
âYou want to get fucked? Thatâs it? Open your fucking legs and Iâll make sure youâre never able to come again unless itâs with me.â
#evilgwrl#call of duty x reader#141 x reader#simon riley#ghost#ghost smut#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley smut#roommate!simon#cod smut#call of duty#call of duty smut
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European getaway || cs55
â summary: y/n goes on a vacation to spain and ends up meeting carlos sainz by chance. tho she has no idea her european fling is actually a very successful f1 driver
â pairing: carlos sainz x nonfamous!reader
â fc & warnings: none
â requested: yes! thank you sm for this wonderful request
ďž. âż ŕ¨â¤ď¸ŕ§â âż . ďž
ynuser has made a post đ
liked by yourbff, yoursibling, friend2, friend 3 and 101 others
ynuser: i could get used to this! me encanta espana
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yourbff: petition for us to stay in spain forever
ynuser: time to find our spanish husbands so we never have to leave!
yoursibling: europe looks good on u
ynuser: thanks b đ
đť
friend3: always serving fits girl
ynuser: half of my clothes are stolen from you
friend2: obsessed with you
ynuser: obsessed with you bb
ynuser has added to their story đ
[1. girls night out ahead. 2. guys i met a hot man at this club. 3. hehe heâs taking me home. we stayed out so late itâs almost light again]
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yourbff: we look cute
yourbff: wait heâs hotter than i originally thought hold up đ¤¤đ¤¤
yourbff: did you even get his name???? how am i supposed to make sure ur safe if i donât know his name
ynuser: dude heâs so hot itâs insane and his name is carlos
ynuser: iâm with him at his hotel rn and this man has to be loaded this is the nicest hotel iâve ever stepped foot in.
yourbff: hot AND rich AND sweet AND a gentleman???????? what is in the water here in spain
ynuser: i just googled his watch that heâs wearing and itâs $300k
yourbff: ok teaâŚâŚy/n/n iâm so serious you are living every girls dream rn including mine
ynuser: i think i love him
yourbff: ok , maybe itâs time for you to come back to the hotel and get some sleep
ynuser: ugh youâre so right.
ynuser: he called me a driver , iâll be back soon
yourbff: PLEASE TELL ME TOU GOT HIS NUMBER
ynuser: more than that đ¤ him and his friend are going to take us out for dinner tomorrow and show us around town đŤđđŤśđť
yourbff: OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
yoursibling: girl you wildin and i love it. stay safe pls
ynuser: yes of course bb
friend3: why that man kinda look familiar
ynuser: if u figure it out lmk
ynuser has added to their story đ
[1. sightseeing courtesy of our new friend carlos. 3. looks like we found ourselves some dates đ]
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friend2: y/n are you sharing churros con chocolate with a MAN
ynuser: YES
ynuser: iâve been caught
friend2: you sneak.. i need every single detail
yourbff: i feel like we are in a movie for real
ynuser: i think we might be
yoursibling: how is it that you and y/bff/n always end up in these sorts of romance novel type situations
ynuser: itâs bc we are the it girls đ
đť
carlossainz55 had added to his story
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user1: what are you doing in madrid carlos
user2: OMG WHO IS THAT IN THE SECOND SLIDE CARLOSSSSS
landonorris: and what do we have here đ
carlossainz55: just some travels in spain!
landonorris: with a girl??
carlossainz55: good catch đ
landonorris: DETAILS?!
carlossainz55: if you must know and you promise to keep it secret
landonorris: of course mate
carlossainz55: i met this gorgeous girl in a club in barcelona and we hit it off. she doesnât know im a driver she just thinks im a guy on holiday and its been rather refreshing so now im showing her around spain
landonorris: i support you in this brother but you know youâre gonna have to explain the whole famous thing at some point
carlossainz55: i know i know
user3: just fell to my knees is this a soft launch
charlesleclerc: enjoying break i see đ
carlossainz55: yes i am đ
user4: everyone stay calm!!!! stay CALM
user5: so little info here how am i supposed to find this girl by her shoes đŤŁ
user6: canât wait till f1gossip sees this
ynuser has added to their story đ
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yoursibling: hold up did HE COME WITJ YOU GUYS
ynuser: yes đ¤
ynuser: when i tell you i think i met the love of my life
yoursibling: ugh iâm so jealous but also so happy for you!! you deserve this
friend2: bruh heâs fine as heck what is going on here
ynuser: no i know
yourbff: wait send me the pic of carlos and teto carrying our luggage pls im begging
ynuser: done and done
friend3: y/n y/m/n y/l/n have you ever seen a formula 1 race before
ynuser: you mean like the race cars?
friend3: yes the race cars!!!! iâm 99.9% sure that man in your photos drives for the FERRARI F1 TEAM. THAT IS THE CARLOS SAINZ
ynuser: oh my god⌠youâre right âŚâŚ.. heâs a FAMOUS FERRARI DRIVER?!
ynuser: oh my god he has 10 million followers
friend3: how did you NOT know this!!!!!!!!
ynuser: idk!!! i donât follow f1!!!
friend3: well now you legally have to
ynuser: clearly omg
friend3: YOURE THE GIRL IN HIS STORY OFNEKGN
ynuser: OMG I AM
f1gossip has made a post
liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5, user6, and 4,255 others
f1gossip: carlos sainz has been spotted getting cozy with a mystery girl in madrid! we think this has got to be the girl who was in the story carlos posted a few days ago. theyâve also been spotted out at dinner with another woman and who we believe to be teto!! no information on who they are just yet but seem by all accounts to not be anyone we know
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user1: when will it be my turn!!!!
user2: that should be me đđđ happy for her i guess đđđŤđŤ
user3: so he was soft launching someone
user4: happy for him ig
friend3: ynuser girl
ynuser: oh my god
friend2: girl oh my god
yourbff: omg stop ???? is this movie about us???
user6: do you all know something we donât
user3: no bc your profile pics kinda be similar to the girl in the pics f1 gossip posted đ
user6: carlos doesnât follow them yet but maybe thatâll change
user3: WAIT IT SAYS HES FOLLOWING YNUSER NOW
user5: i am so envious
ynuser has added to their story đ
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friend3: ok so the fan girls have found us it seems
ynuser: they really have⌠i have 2,694 follower requests right now
yourbff: the f1gossip account is trying to contact me,, theyâre literally in my dms rnâŚ. you look hot tho đđđŤ
ynuser: theyâre also trying to message me too. never thought our trip to spain would end up like this (iâm not complaining this is just a little overwhelming)
yourbff: me neither but if it had to happen iâm glad you met carlos!! you two seem like genuinely really well matched. i know itâs only been likeâŚ. 3 weeks but im stanning and shipping y/ncarlos so hard
ynuser: đŽâđ¨đ y/ncarlos omg stop hahaha
ynuser: iâm planning to put him in my pocket and take him back to the states with us
carlossainz55: ay dios mĂo hermosa chica đđ
ynuser: đ¤ youâre making me blush
carlossainz55: good, itâs cute when you blush
ynuser: you really have 10 million followers and drive for the scuderia ferrari huh
carlossainz55: yes mi amor. im sorry for not telling you sooner⌠i just really was enjoying getting to know you as just carlos and not as the ferrari driver
ynuser: and that makes sense i just ⌠this is all just a bit intimidating
carlossainz55: no reason to be intimidated, iâm still just carlos đĽş
ynuser: if you say so
carlossainz55: i do say so hermosađ¤
carlossainz55: now that the cat is out of the bagâŚ. do you want to come watch me race?
ynuser: you want me to come to one of your races?
carlossainz55: only if you want to! no pressure at all tho y/n/n
ynuser: iâd love to đŤ
carlossainz55: i was hoping youâd say that. iâll make arrangements for you to come to monza đ
ynuser: italy?! omg iâve never been to italy!!!!
carlossainz55: never?! oh boy then i have quite the time planned for us
landonorris: i feel like an elite member of a very exclusive club for being able to follow
ynuser: you are!! only 231 other people have the privilege
friend2: please send lando norris my number i see heâs following you now
ynuser: HAHAHAAH i respect the hustle. i tell him about you when i meet him in person in 2 weeks
friend2: IN PWROSN Y/N WHAT
yoursibling: bestie why are race car fan accounts trying to contact me all the sudden
ynuser: so you know that man iâve been seeing while in spain with y/bff/n? turns out heâs a very famous formula 1 driver
yoursibling: youâve got to be kidding me
ynuser: i am being very for real
ynuser has made a post đ
liked by carlossainz55, yourbff, yoursibling, friend2, landonorris, friend3, and 102 others
ynuser: thank you to spain for literally changing my life
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friend2: omg thatâs where my sunglasses went đ
ynuser: idk what youâre talking abt đ¤
yourbff: thanks for going on the trip of a lifetime with me y/n/n
ynuser: i love you bestie đŤśđť
carlossainz55: and thank you to the universe for crossing our paths đĽš
ynuser: thank you universe, i am forever grateful đŤ
landonorris: ok cool girl alert
ynuser: you know it
friend3: iâm not sure how to act normal in these comments y/n
ynuser: me neither
yoursibling: youâre never coming home after italy in a few weeks are you
ynuser: nope!
carlossainz55 has made a post
liked by user1, charlesleclerc, scuderiaferrari, ynuser, yourbff, landonorris, yoursibling, and 783,102 others
carlossainz55: happy for the team, charles and the tifosi. itâs a shame i missed the podium but at least i got to spend my birthday with my favorite girl. until next time monza!
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user2: ohhhhhh a hard launch
user3: i wish he got a podium in his last monza in a ferrari
charlesleclerc: â¤ď¸ thank you chili
alexandrasaintmleux: cuties đ¤
user4: this hard launch is distracting me from the immense sadness, thanks carlos
user55: sheâs living my dream your honor
ynuser: feliz cumpleaĂąos mi amor
carlossainz55: gracias princessa
ynuser: gracias por una semana perfecta [thank you for a perfect week]
carlossainz55: de nada đ¤
user10: you did all you could carlos
scuderiaferrari: we are proud of you chili
user16: you and your big brain still did amazing
yourbff: you did great carlos!
ďž. âż ŕ¨â¤ď¸ŕ§â âż . ďž
a/n: likes and reblogs appreciated!! i quite liked this one and hope you did too
ďž. âż ŕ¨â¤ď¸ŕ§â âż . ďž
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
Š norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
#f1 fandom#formula 1#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#cs55 smau#cs55 x y/n#cs55 fluff#cs55 imagine#cs55 x reader#cs55 x you#cs55 fic#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x female reader#carlos sainz smau#carlos sainz fic#carlos sainz fluff
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đ˛đ¨đŽđŤ đŚđđŹđŹ.
đŠairing. bf!jay x fmr
đ enre. angst, fluff, suggestive ( tiniest bit ) | post-sex-argument kinda thing
đ°arnings. not that many tbh⌠nicknames, lots of kissing, jay being clingy, lmk if i need to add more.
đ°c. 1k+
đ/đ§. yes i wrote another argument with jay drabble leave me alone pls . :)
you lie on your side, staring at the wall, the last remainders of anger still simmering in your chest. the sheets are tangled around your legs, sticky with sweat and other remnants of the night. you can feel jay's presence behind you, his warm body felt in sharp contrast to the lingering cold tension on your skin.
the argument keeps replaying in your mind like a stuck record. the raised voices and harsh words now seem pointless. your heart is knotted with frustration, and even though there's been a spark between you, your anger hasn't fully faded.
you hear jay shift behind you, the bed creaking under his weight. a moment later, his arm snakes around your waist, pulling you back against his chest. his breath is warm against the nape of your neck, but instead of comforting you, it only fuels your frustration. how can he be so calm? so casual? after everything that was said.
âstill mad?â his voice is soft.
you bite your lip, refusing to give him the satisfaction of a response. the last thing you want is for him to think that he can just brush everything under the rug with a few well-placed kisses and whispered apologies.
but jay has always had a knack for finding the cracks in your armor. his lips find the curve of your shoulder, trailing lazy kisses up your neck. you shiver despite yourself, your body betraying the anger still coiled in your chest.
ây/n,â he murmurs against your skin, his voice a velvet caress that sends a shiver down your spine. âcome on, baby, talk to me.â
you let out a sigh, your irritation slipping through in the sound. âi donât want to talk to you right now.â
his lips pause in their journey up your neck, and you feel him pull back slightly. thereâs a moment of silence, and you can practically feel the gears turning in his mind as he tries to figure out how to approach this. jay is many thingsâcharming, witty, endlessly patientâbut right now, you donât want any of those things. you want him to understand how much he hurt you.
âi messed up. i shouldnât have said those things. iâm sorry.â he says finally, his voice losing some of its playful edge.
you close your eyes, willing yourself not to cry. youâre still so angry, but thereâs a part of you that hates feeling this way, hates the distance thatâs grown between you two because of a stupid argument.
âyou always do this,â you whisper, your voice barely audible. âyou say things you donât mean, and then you act like everythingâs fine. its not.â
thereâs a pause, and for a moment, you think he might just drop it, let the silence stretch out between you like a chasm neither of you are brave enough to cross. but then he sighs, and you feel his arms tighten around you, pulling you closer.
ây/n, iâm sorry. i was stupid, and i said things i didnât mean. i donât want to lose you over something so dumb.â you could tell he regretted it now, especially by the tone of his voice.
you want to stay mad, to hold on to the anger a little longer, but itâs hard when heâs being like thisâwhen heâs holding you like he never wants to let go.
but instead of responding, you push his arms away and slip out of bed, the cool air hitting your bare skin as you stand. without a word, you grab the discarded shirt from the floor and pull it over your head, barely covering yourself as you make your way toward the bathroom. you can feel jay's eyes on you, but you donât turn around. youâre still too angry, too raw.
you hear him sigh behind you, a soft sound filled with frustration and regret. a moment later, his footsteps follow you, and before you even think to close the bathroom door, his arms are around your waist again, pulling you back against him. his lips find your neck, pressing soft, apologetic kisses to your skin.
ây/n, please,â he whispers, his voice laced with guilt. âthis is the last thing iâd ever want to happen between usââ âyou made it happen. this is your mess.â you cut him off.
you take your hands off of the edge of the sink, looking up at him from the mirror, trying to focus on anything but the feel of his lips against your skin, the warmth of his body pressed against yours. but itâs impossible to ignore the way your heart beats just a little faster when heâs this close.
âyou canât keep hurting me and then expect everything to be okay because you apologized,â you continue, your voice barely above a whisper. âitâs not that simple.â
âi know itâs not. but i love you, and iâll do whatever it takes to make this right. just... donât push me away.â he says, and thereâs a tremor in his voice that makes your heart clench.
his words hang in the air, heavy with sincerity, and for a moment, you feel your anger slip away, replaced by a bone-deep exhaustion. you donât want to fight anymore. you just want to be held, to feel like everything will be okay.
you stay silent, allowing jay to cling to you as you both begin to clean yourselves up. his hands are gentle as he helps, and the quiet between you is soothing, a way to ease the tension without words.
jay doesnât push you for conversation, his presence a steady comfort as he quietly assists. heâs patient. the room slowly returns to its normal state, and the silence between you starts to feel less oppressive, more like a shared space where both of you can catch your breath.
finally, as you finish up and the room is back in order, jay breaks the silence. âdo you want some tea before bed?â he asks softly, a hint of hope in his voice. âit can help you sleep better.â
you nod, the gesture small but meaningful. âyeah, that would be nice.â
jayâs face brightens with relief, and he moves to prepare the tea. you watch from the edge of the kitchen, the familiarity of his actions a comforting reminder of the normalcy you both seek. he works efficiently, filling the kettle, selecting your favorite tea, and letting the water come to a boil.
when the tea is ready, he brings a steaming cup to you. you take the cup from him, the warmth of the ceramic soothing against your cold fingers. jay settles beside you, his gaze attentive as you sip the tea slowly, savoring the calm it brings.
the room is quiet, the only sounds being the gentle clinking of the cup and the soft hum of jayâs breathing. he watches you with an unreadable expression as you finish your tea.
as you place the empty cup down, you finally turn to him, your eyes meeting his with a gentle smile. he waits, his gaze steady, and you can see the vulnerability in his eyes.
leaning in, you press a gentle kiss to his lips, the touch tenderâand jayâs arms instantly wrap around you, pulling you close as he returns the kiss, a sigh of relief escaping him.
the kiss deepens, his lips moving in unison against yours as his hands slide up under your shirt, his touch firm but gentle. your arms wrapping around his neck as you both lose yourselves in the kiss.
you break the kiss, both of you breathless and flushed, and a soft giggle escapes your lips. jayâs eyes sparkle with such affection, and he pulls you into a warm embrace, holding you close as you snuggle against him.
âyouâre cute when youâre mad,â he murmurs, his voice light and teasing.
âshut up,â you laugh, your voice muffled against his chest as you hug him tighter.
jay chuckles, his hands stroking your back in a soothing rhythm, until there was a little silence again, as if he was trying to find the right words to say. âiâm sorry, y/n. i really am.â
you look up at his lips again and only nodded, caressing his cheek with your thumb. âits okay, but if it happens again. there will be consequences.â you raise your eyebrows
âyeah? what kind of consequences?â he teases and you roll your eyes as he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. âyouâll see,â you chuckle.
âi love you.â
âi love you too.â
YOURSJAEYUN est. 2024 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
#enhypen#enhypen imagines#enhypen fluff#enhypen scenarios#jay enhypen#jay imagines#jay angst#jay x reader#jay fluff#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen fanfic#enhypen drabbles#enhypen fic#enha#enhypen jay#jay#park jongseong#enha imagines#enha x reader#enha fluff#jay scenarios
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satoru loves you & heâs tired of being your friend
a/n: loosely inspired by taehyungs song fri(end)s i hope u guys like pls lmk what yall think plsplsplspls
word count - 1,764
masterlist
the only light illuminating your living room was from your tv as it played your favorite comfort movie, one youâd seen countless times before. the familiarity of it had you dozing off on your couch, in and out of sleep as you lost the battle with your heavy eyelids.
thereâs a soft knock on your door that has you jumping out of your skin, heart racing loudly in your ears. you pause the movie, wondering if maybe youâd hallucinated it and it truly was time for you to go to bed.
knock, knock, knock
your palms are sweaty, checking your phone before standing up. thereâd been no missed texts or calls from anyone you knew, who the fuck knocks on a door at 3:24 in the morning?
you grab the baseball bat by the door, peeking through the peephole and being met with tousled white locks. a color of hair youâd be able to spot a mile away, one youâd grown to care for.
âwhat are you doing at my door at four in the fucking morning?â you whisper-yelled, setting the bat down and opening the door wider to let the man in. he gives you a small smile, one hand pushing his hair back and out of his face and the other holding his side.
âsorry sweet cheeks, didnât wanna go home just yetâ he mumbles, stepping in and standing by the doorway, waiting for your instruction.
âdâyou get hurt? are you bleeding?â the annoyance in your voice is gone, and it makes satoru relax. he gives you a small nod, shrugging his shoulders and trying to play it off.
ânothing that wonât be healed by morninââ you roll your eyes at him, muttering a small âcome onâ and walking to the bathroom down the hall. âi miss you yâknowâ satoru says softly, watching as you searched for the first aid kit under the sink, grabbing the box and making him sit on the toilet lid.
âdid you really?â you scoff, not meeting his gaze as you grab a soft rag, running it under warm water. satoru furrows his brows, confused as to why you think he wouldnât have missed you.
ââcourse i did,â he replies, opening his mouth to continue but closing it quickly when you turn to face him.
âcan i take your blindfold offâ you ask, your hands fiddling with the damp rag before setting it down when he nods âyes.â you find the small knot hiding in his hair, gently undoing it.
the black blindfold loosen instantly, and youâre quick to gently take it off his head, setting it on the counter. his hair flops onto his forehead, falling almost perfectly to frame his face. despite the countless times youâd seen his eyes, your breath still hitched in your throat when you looked into them.
you try not to stare too long, brushing his hair out of his face and cleaning the dried blood on his face. satoru doesnât take his eyes off you, eyes tracing your every feature. his gaze is one you always faltered under, growing nervous when heâd stare at you for too long.
âwhatâ you ask, a small nervous smile forming on your face. satoru shakes his head, a small upside down smile on his face as you wipe the cut on his cheeks with an alcohol wipe.
âyouâre just real prettyâ he says, watching as you bite your bottom lip, surely trying to stop the smile fighting its way into your face.
âis you side hurt too?â you motion to where his hand is covering, trying to brush past the compliment heâd given you.
âhealed it up a good amount while you were cleaning me upâ he shrugs, lifting his shirt and showing you the brand new scar, âIâm not completely helpless.â
âno youâre the strongestâ you tease, throwing away the used items and washing your hands. âdid you wanna shower? you look like you could use itâ satoru pouts at your words.
âdonât have to be so mean about itâ you laugh softly, drying your hands before youâre standing in front of him again. you let your hands brush through his hair, exposing his forehead before you press a kiss to the skin.
âsorry angel, youâre the one who woke me upâ satoru lets his eyes close softly, heart sinking a bit when you pull away from him.
âIâve got some clothes youâve left over so Iâll leave âem on the counterâ you smile, closing the door behind you and sighing softly.
howâd you get to this point? howâre you stuck between friends and something more?
friends donât feel the way you do about satoru. friends donât place feathery kisses on their friends scars. friends donât act the way you two act.
satoru steps out of the shower, smiling when he realizes his clothes smell like you. his heart leaps when he exits the restroom, finding you still awake and waiting for him on the couch.
âwaiting for someone?â his voice makes you jump a bit, shaking you head and watching as he sits next to you. âdid you have plans for tomorrow?â he questions, watching as you send a text.
âtold them something came up,â you shrug, âfigured you need me more.â
the words tugged on satoruâs heartstrings. there was a never night you hadnât been there when he needed you. youâd been there for him since the day youâd met him, there to comfort him and ease his racing mind. you were there to calm him from panic attacks and frustrations, help him through grief and stress. everything.
you were a great friend.
he hated that word. you werenât his friend, you were something more. he knew how he felt about you, he had an inkling feeling you felt the same. so whatâs stopping him?
satoru shakes the question out of his head, focusing instead on the tv. the end credits are rolling but youâre not looking away, eyes unfocused and your mind elsewhere.
âshould we go to sleep?â satoru whispers, a feathery touch to snap you back to reality. you nod with a small smile, the two of you making the familiar walk to your bedroom, satoru turning off any lights and closing the bedroom door behind him before slipping in next to you.
youâd always liked having your head on his chest, you were able to hear his heartbeat this way. the rhythmic pitter-patter never failed to make you smile or help you relax. it also gave away anytime he was nervous.
âyour hearts beating real fastâ you state, not looking up, instead continuing to draw circles in the palm of his hand. âwhat are you thinking about?â
thereâs too many thoughts in satoruâs head, so many that he canât begin to process a single one of them. so instead he blurts out what had been on his mind all night.
âi love you.â
you never thought people were telling the truth about time stopping when something like this happened. youâd always figured they romanticized their life a little too much.
but you felt time stop.
your fingers faltered and you felt your breathing hitch in your throat. your stomach erupted in butterflies, face hot and your eyes wide as the three words landed on your ears.
there was a million thoughts in your head, memories flooding in. spring nights around a fire pit, hot summer days at the beach, cool autumn afternoons carving pumpkins and cold winter mornings drinking hot chocolate. and in every one of them you bit back three words while staring at the white haired man.
âyou donât have to say it backâ satoru begins, his heart beating even faster than before, âi just- Iâve been think-â you sit up quickly and cut him off, shaking your head and finally looking him in the eyes.
âI love you too,â you smile, letting yourself enjoy the the moment of euphoria the two of you felt upon hearing the other say the three words youâd dreamt of.
thereâs only a second of silence before satoruâs blue eyes are looking at your lips, flickering up to meet your eyes momentarily. all it takes is you leaning in ever so slightly.
his hands are cupping your cheeks, crashing his lips against yours, a sense of urgency as his lips move against yours. he tastes like his vanilla lip balm and toothpaste, smiling as the words replay in your head.
âwhatâs funny?â he mumbles against your lips, laughing softly, not bothering to pull away from your lips. satoruâs cerulean eyes are fluttering open, completely focused on you.
you pull away a couple inches, staring into his eyes, you can see the emotions swimming in his eyes, love and excitement written over his face as he takes in your beauty.
âjust happyâ you reply, ânever thought youâd put the end in friendsâ satoru pouts comically at your words, shoving his face in your lap and groaning softly.
ââm sorryâ he grumbles, ânew to all the relationship stuffâ thereâs genuine frustration and remorse in his voice, it makes you smile as your run your fingers through his hair, tugging softy.
ââs okayâ you say, âthought technically Iâm not yours since you havenât asked meâ he knows youâre poking fun at him, not rushing him into anything.
âdonât worry,â he says, sitting up and adjusting himself to lay down next to you, smiling when you lay your head on his chest, âgonna make you mine as soon as i can.â
the words make your heart flutter again, a sheepish smile on your face as your cheeks and ears burn.
âalright smooth talker letâs get some sleep.â
funny enough satoru feels the weight on his shoulders grow lighter with your body weight pressed against him. he feels a sense of serenity running his fingers up and down your exposed skin.
you can see goosebumps rise where your fingertips touch, smiling softly and holding back a giggle as your fingers ghost over his abs, causing him to shiver.
itâs different from before, more intimate.
satoru wonders why he was so afraid of baring his heart to you in the first place. he canât find an excuse as he watches the golden ray of sunshine hit your face softly, causing you to stir. heâs still as he watches you immediately nuzzle your face into his side, falling back into a deep sleep in his arms.
it doesnât take long for him to fall asleep too, a smile on his face when he feels your grip tighten.
lovers, he thinks, it has a nice ring to it.
taglist (send an ask to be added): @chilichopsticks @anime-for-the-sleepless @safaia-47 @nanamikentoseyebags @fushironi @nineooooo @the-mom-friend-dot-com @gojoshooter @beautiful-is-boring @sweetheart-satoru @luna0713hunter @torusmochi @kentocalls @sadmonke
#not proofread oopsies#idk how i feel abt this pls give me feedback yall#gojo satoru#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru fluff#gojo satoru drabble#gojo satoru imagine#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x y/n#satoru gojo x reader#gojou satoru x reader#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo x y/n#satoru gojo imagine#satoru gojo drabble#satoru gojo one shot#satoru gojo fluff#gojo x reader#jjk gojo x reader#gojo x reader fluff#gojo x you#gojo x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#add to masterlist
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LIE DETECTOR TEST : ISAGI YOICHI
âš summary : the blue lock boys are invited to take a lie detector test, but theyâve got to answer twitterâs unfiltered questions
âš pairing : isagi yoichi x reader (established relationship)
âš wc : 543
âš warnings : reader is referred to as âgirlâ with she/her pronouns, suggestive, mentions of oral sex, if Iâm missing something pls lmk!! MINORS DNI
âš A/N : this is a repost from my prev blog bc i wanna continue this series and i cant post the next part without the context from this one so if it looks familiar, thats why. ALSO if anyone has a reblog of bachira's part somewhere pls send me the link!!
âš bachiraâs version | kunigamiâs version
âReady?â
âYeah, letâs do thisâ
â@/isagisbbybgrl asks How big is your dick?â
Isagi had practically choked on his own spit at the question. Â âWhaâwhy is this the first question?!â
âIâm just reading out what Twitter wants to know?â, the interviewer laughs at the shock in his face. âNow answer the question.â
Isagi, Kunigami and Bachira were currently sat side by side across from their interviewer. They had been invited to guest star on LockX , one of the most popular podcasts to date relating to everything and anything Blue Lock. And today they were asked to answer a few fan questions from Twitter all while hooked up to a lie detector. Up first was Isagi, who looked like he was already regretting coming today.
âLike 10 inchesâ he sighed out. All heads turned to the polygraph examinerâ Milo was his name.
âThereâs no wayââ
âTruthâ
Bachira laughs out at Kunigamiâs disbelief while the latter mumbles to himself. Something about not believing it till he sees it himself.
âWait, now Iâm curiousâ Bachira scooted forward and turned to Isagi. âHow much of it does your girl take in her mouth?
âWhat the fuck Megs? Nope. Iâm not talking about Y/N here. Not like that.â
âSorry to break it to you, but more than half these Twitter asks are about her,â the interviewer adds.
âCome onnnn Yoichiâ
âFine. All of it. Next questionâ
âMilo?â
âHeâs telling the truthâ Milo nods back, while the room fills with whistles and cheers to Isagi, whoâs hidden his face behind a hand but canât help the proud smirk that grows on his face at the thought of you taking all of him.
âOkay okayâ the interviewer laughs before he directs his next question, âUser @/mysagiballs asks where is your favorite place to kiss a partner?â
âHey at least this oneâs not about Y/Nâ
âEhh it technically is,â Bachira counters.
âIt basically is,â Isagi sighs once again, finally accepting that this is what the rest of the interview will be like. âHer lips, thatâs my favorite place to kiss herâ
âHeâs lying.â
âWha- No Iâm not!â
âAnother lieâ
âI feel like of all the questions youâve been asked, this is the most mild.â Kunigami speaks up.
âBut youâre lying about it, which means thereâs something juicy youâre hidingâ Bachira teases.
âFine, her cheekâ
âStill lyingâ
âSeriously Milo!â
This continues on for a few minutes, Isagi calling out a bodypart and Milo calling out his bullshit.
Her neck. Lie. Her shoulders. Lie. Her hands. Lie.
Meanwhile Bachira and Kunigami have practically fallen off the sofa in tears, laughing at how frustrated Isagi grows with every call of his bluff.
âBetween her legs, alright?! Iâm not getting any more specific than that. You can figure the rest out yourselves Iâm sureâ, he glares at Milo as he grumbles out his final answer.
âThat was theâŚtruthâ
It takes a few moments for Bachira to calm down from his hysterics but then heâs teasing Isagi for being so naughty, giggling at the sight of his friend aggressively ripping off the cuffs and sensors connecting him to the polygraph.
âYeah yeah, laugh all you want now but youâre going next.â Isagi grins at him, excited to see his friend suffer the same as he did.
#bllk x reader#blue lock#blue lock x reader#isagi yoichi#bllk isagi#blue lock isagi#isagi x reader#isagi x you#isagi yoichi x reader#blue lock anime#bllk lie detector series
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