#pls 02 give me a lot of them

[focalove]

Bathing with him

Cw! : gn!reader....... with some mentions of maybe f!/m!reader, mentions of d*ck, nothing too explicit. written before sunday & aven release!

Aventurine

✦ 01 bb come home the kids miss u :(

✦ 02 Though, by all means, Aventurine never or rarely reveal his ✦ bare naked self infront of anyone. So congratulations for achieving this level of intimacy with him

✦ 03 At first he'd be so cocky and teaseful when you asked him if you wanted to bath with him

✦ 04 "Oh? princess/prince-y here wants to bathe with me? well what's the occasion, or are you just that touch starved?" he snickered with a smirk of a devil in his face

✦ 05 I also think he'd also ask you to undress you to like "sweetie… I don't think I can take off my shirt… can you help me?" and he would be dangling his chest window area

✦ 06 and his pants too maybe, to show you his d---

✦ 07 anywayz, when both of you finally get in the bathtub, he'd be so shy

✦ 08 pls lead him!! princess needs his directions on how to do it correctly :<

Aventurine had a big bathroom. Big bathtub, a lot of space, fully furnished bathroom, a complete set of bath commodities. For you, it was like a dream bathroom. And there you are, sitting on the brims of the bathtub. The water tempeture was warm and the fragrance of the soap that had been mixed with the water was devine.

The door opened, revealing Aventurine in a towel around his waist. You can hear the footsteps behind you. An indication he's coming. "The water is set, you can get it in you'd like" you played with the water just a bit.

Aventurine put a hand onto your shoulder and gave you a kiss on the cheek "Mhm sure, arent you getting in honey?"

"I am, i am.. what, you need help with your towel?"

"Is that an offer, sweetheart?"

"…forget I said anything then" he snorted and smirked hearing your retort

As soon as both of you had done removing eachother's towels, both of you get in the bath tub.

Aventurine, gets in slowly, almost like as if he was scared to break the water itself. Adorable, really. To see a man who acts so smug and so sure of himself, express nervousness when he's just taking a bath with his one and only lover. You noticed his nervous behavior and you cant help but let out a light chuckle, "Scared much, Avey?".

In which he reply "Nonsense, lovely." however to contrast his words, he stammered on his words he spoke. It's not that noticeable, so he hopes you don't notice it.

yet ofcouse you would notice it and scooch over to him closer and give him a little kiss on his shoulder and snake an arm on the back of his waist. Just a way to tease him, just a bit.

He flinched slightly by your touch and scoffed "Devil much huh? oh sorry, I meant hell spawn." you laugh, "Not my fault that handsome here is so stiff. Come on, I'll wash your hair and you wash mine"

He let you do as you please with him. It felt oddly nice to have someone taking care of him for once in a lifetime. You do it so gently with him too, now how could he not feel at least slightly emotional when only such a few people have given him comfort and almost all of them have died? And now here you are, taking care of him like he's a stray cat.

He just can't help it but say

".... I'm glad I met you, I love you, sweetheart."

Jing Yuan

✦ 01 Big cat. Very big cat.

✦ 02 Big cat flop onto the bath tub

✦ 03 Big cat will ask u to wash his hair (uncertain he would do the same tho)

✦ 04 Will sleep if u take too long to shampoo his hair.

✦ 05 Cold water can do the trick to wake him up

✦ 06 Would probably pull you in a huge hug too.

When Jing Yuan got on the bathtub, it was almost as if he hogged all the space that were available. "Hey, how come I don't get a room?" You complained. Which he replies with a lazy smirk "you can just sit on my lap?"

An awkward pause fills up the room, and the longer the pause, the more contagious the little pink blush is on your cheeks which he just cannot help himself to laugh. "Well? Would you like to, dove?" In which you just let out a whine.

Eventually, you cave in and give into his whims. It's not like there's any other way to get in the bath tub without any of his body parts being touched by you. Now here you are, sitting on top of his lap, looking like a confused cat, don't know where to leap next.

It was a sight for sore eyes. You looked cute, now he can't help but let out a playful chuckle and bring you forward to him. "Why so stiff? Is it your first time seeing me stripped? I don't think so…" Worst part, he gave you his signature little lazy smile, looking like he has no wrongdoings.

"That's… Irrelevant, just let me do your hair, baobei." Hence, he let his head down and let you untie his ponytail, and do the rest

While you were washing his hair, his eyelids suddenly felt heavy. He couldn't help it, it felt so good to have your delicate yet skillful fingers all over his scalp. It just so happens that you were doing too great of your job.

"Baobei, it's done~!" You twisted his hair and stuck it into the top of his head. "Baobei?" You called him out again. No response.

Out of suspicion, you raise his head to show his sleeping face. Ah, in all of the places in the universe.. he just had to sleep at this moment, you thought. Abruptly, you had a really… Devious plan to wake him up.

Jing Yuan really just needed to rinse the shampoo away and he'd be done. But instead of using the warm water, just use the icy cold water to wake him up. And perhaps instead of using the shower, why not just pour a bucket full of it? That's exactly what you did.

Sure, it's quite literally deceitful, but at least it gets the job done. It's hard to wake up this big general, so a bucket of cold water could do.

You took a small bucket lying around the bathroom and filled it up with cold water. Little did you know, Jing Yuan was already awake when you were done with his hair.

You swear you didn't feel the water vibrations changing, but somehow, he's already in your shoulder while you were still not done filling the bucket.

"Mmnh… What are you doing my Qīn qīn? Not trying to splash me with the cold water aren't you?"

Drat. How did he even—

"No-no… O-ofcourse not.."

"Then what is it for, hm?"

"I…" You decided to give up from the act. Goddamnit, you were so close!

"you know what? yes, I was, now.. have a taste—!" You splashed the water into his face. Yet, no response. Not even a reaction, single flinch, nothing… Literally unfazed.

"Mhm, it takes more than that to even make me flinch, baobei dear."

Sunday

✦ 01 Asking to bath with Sunday isn't really that hard... But he would reassure you if you want to do it, it's a very intimate action to bathe with one another.

✦ 02 But bathing with Sunday is like bathing with an angel in a cloud

✦ 03 He'd be so soft, delicate. As if scared to even hurt you, make a wrong move.

✦ 04 Though, as delicate as he can be, he expects you to do the same.

✦ 05 He would let you wash his wings, but be gentle with them!

✦ 06 Once again, his touch is so gentle. Like imagine him washing your face with his thumbs just circling your cheeks

"Dear, turn your head downwards for me please?" He asked. Your boyfriend, Sunday, couldn't have been more gentler. He's washing your hair and your whole body with firm yet gentle strokes. You did as he asked and turned your head downwards. "Good girl/boy..." and thus felt the warm water wash away all the foam that covered your entire frame.

"Mm... Shouldn't I be the one praising you, angel?" He let out a silent chuckle "And who's being the obedient one here, hm?" It was a somewhat convenient playful banter between the two of you. Convincing the other that they're better.

Once you're done, Sunday gave one last splash of water to your hair and scrub off any remaining shampoo or soap that still be sticking around. "There, all done." He gave a wet kiss on the forehead. Which you unintentionally let out a giggle. "Hey this isn't fair, can't I bathe you too?" You note, it was true, all this time who's getting the royalty treatment is just you. "Do you want to? If so you could do that.."

An unanticipated idea came up from your oh so brilliant head "How about I wash your wings?"

"..." He hesitated just a bit. If truth be told, he was quite... Anxious to lend you his wings. Just what if you accidentally pulled one of the feathers? "How about my.. body, dear? My hair?" He recommended

"I mean— sure.. but can I wash your wings? Pleasee?" You insisted and pleaded. You even crawled your way to his chest, he felt compelled to kiss that face of yours and hug you tight. Just how can he reject you? "Fine, fine... But be extremely gentle." He sighed.

You started on with his right wing. Once you've held it, the wing flinches by accident. You poured the soap into your hand and started caressing the tip of his wing, cleaning all the dirt or dust that was there. "Does this hurt, sunday?" Through which he denies "no, absolutely not, darling. You're doing great" and purred as you do his wings

As you did the other wing, he kept purring like a pigeon being petted. Perhaps it was to imply that he was very enjoying this.

"Enjoying this much, love?"

"Very" he cood "oh, and thank you, I love you darling.." you giggled in response as you rinse both of his wings "I love you too."

✧ XTRA : i fking gentlemenfied sunday dawg :sob: also this was vv rushed, thats why it keeps getting shorter from aven to sunday (Aven is 430 words n sunday is 400 words) but oddly enough jy is 560 words💀 cringed so bad in jy's part tho like i speedrun that shit & gonna write guitarist bf kazuha after this

[these-posts-arent-real]

(masterpost link)

Aaand we have returned to the madness on a larger scale! What are these cats up to...

#sighh #i know i've been away from dash sim posting for a while #was dealing with my last few days of school #but #that is Over Now #i can return to fulfilling everyone's need for Warrior Cats But Tumblr

57 notes

🐦 s3afow1s--sc0wl Follow

PLEASE stop talking about the most recent TTDV slates without spoilers, it hasn't made its rounds to ShadowClan yet and I don't want to know what's going to happen before I read it!!!!

#ttdv discussion #ttdv:rp #through the desert vast #ttdv: rattlesnake path #ttdv #through the desert vast: rattlesnake path #especially since i heard the newest slates have seafowl in them a lot #he's my specialest guy...

9 notes

🔁 🛤 carnation-stem-02 reblogged

🍲 ex-thundrclan-kipper Follow

I think the worst thing about no longer being a Clan cat is that a lot of the time I have no idea what y'all over there are talking about. What is TTDV?

🦁 lionsight-x3 Follow

TTDV stands for Through the Desert Vast. It's a new slate series everyone's going bee-brained over... I haven't read it yet because I prefer for a series to be finished before reading, but I've heard good things. Queer rep within the first couple chapters of the first slate-set, a non-traditional setting and cast (a rogue group living in the desert), and complex characters... needless to say I'm excited for when it finishes and I can read it!

#it's been on my to-read list for a while #maybe this is a sign #it seems pretty cool #ttdv

2,070 notes

🔁 🐦 s3afow1s--sc0wl reblogged

⛰️ fc-rockpaint Follow

In honor of Through the Desert Vast becoming popular, I've decided to make a rock-dye project on all of the main characters. Today's character is... Seafowl!

Unfortunately I don't have the right paints to portray him accurately (I haven't been able to find any white herbs for his patches, but I'm still on the lookout!) but this is mostly accurate to how he is described in the slates.

🌠 nightshade-tast3s-yummy Follow

Pssst... @s3afow1s--sc0wl

#eeeek! seafowl! #i looove him so much... my precious boy... #art #ttdv #ttdv seafowl #thanks for the tag!

162 notes

🔁 🌻 l1llyst3m reblogged

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

Aahhhh I've finally gotten into TTDV and... NOBODY was gonna tellme that one of the characters is heavily implied to be transfem? Nobody thought I'd find this interesting????

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

SCRATCH THAT. IT'S CANON. PIT VIPER IS CANONICALLY TRANS.

🐚 hermitcrabfriend Follow

I had wondered if you were talking about Pit Viper when I saw this post a cople days ago! Apparently so ^w^ yeah, it's canon, gets confirmed in the second slate set.

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

This makes me wonder. Why is everyone on this site talking about Seafowl saying he gives "egg vibes" when we have. An actual confirmed trans character. Right here.

Nothing against Seafowl but the only vibe he gives off to me is traumatized.

🏞 trouttail-prefers-bass Follow

He's your typical prettyboy cishet protagonist type and everyone is pissed off that he's a side character rather than ttdv's ✨️specialest boy✨️. So they're trying to make him special by claiming he gives off trans vibes when he clearly does not and is happy as a tom.

🌻 l1llyst3m Follow

#wait till op reads rattlesnake path

What do you mean by that-

#what do you MEAN by that— #im gonna need context #is this /pos or /neg #does something bad happen in rattlesnake path?? #help someone pls #through the desert vast #ttdv

103 notes

🔁 🥬 rxttencatmint reblogged

🥬 rxttencatmint

Im so fucking irritated... my mom wont let me read TTDV because it's "inApPrOpRiAtE." Which. Of course. Is because it has lgbtqia+ characters.

🥬 rxttencatmint

WONDEDFUL NEWS. MY MENTOR LET ME BORROW HIS COPY OF THE FIRST SET. AHHHHH!!!!! I GET TO READ IT!!

#YIPPEEEEE #òwó im so exCITED!!! #ive been wanting to read ttdv for a whileee #i love my mentor sm

5 notes

🪵 i-eat-moss Follow

My unpopular opinion (TTDV:RP SPOILERS INCOMING)

Keep reading

#ttdv:rp #ttdv #rattlesnake path spoilers #ttdv spoilers #ttdv:rp spoilers #nothing against pit viper!!! #i like her as a character #i just dont get why we got a whole book explaining her backstory

203 notes

🐚 hermitcrabfriend Follow

I LOOOOVE RATTLESNAKE PATH SO MUCH. IVE JUST GOTTEN TO READ IT AND IM SO EXCITED. OMG.

Not only is it a whole set dedicated to my favorite character !!! like a dream come true!!! It ALSO contains good intersex rep (Ball Python my beloved!!!). Over all just a FANTASTIC set in a fantastic series.

12 notes

🌱 dirtdigger-23 Follow

I'm... back?? I'M BACK ON CLANBLR!!!! WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO

#i thought i'd never get back #stuck on Tumblr...

0 notes

🍽 the-post-maker

I hope y'all enjoyed this insight into what the cats do when they get fandom-y... and if you want to discuss TtDV further... well, there's a server for that ;) now back to your regular dash

[yeonboy]

𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐥 ♡ choi yeonjun // mlist.

After facing disappointment with love for years upon years, you have chosen to replace romance with dance in your life, dedicating your entire time to this dance academy you’re employed at. It’s not that you hate men now, you just don’t expect to fall for them anymore because all they do is break your heart. And then Choi Yeonjun enters your life as a new recruit at the academy – sweet, adorable, soft spoken, kind and younger than you. He is everything you have never found attractive in a guy before. But somehow, you're helplessly spiraling for him.

❧ choi yeonjun x f. reader | 16+ | smau ♡ comedy ♡ angst ♡ strangers to friends to lovers!au ♡ dance academy!au ♡ 98-liner!reader ♡ dancer!reader ♡ dancer!yeonjun ♡ slow burn.

❧ warnings! profanity, an ABUNDANCE of suggestive jokes, mentions of people's sex lives (or lack thereof), death & murder threats as jokes, some of the characters being assholes for no reason, reader being a commitment phobe, a lot of pining, a ton of miscommunication (hehe ofc <3), misunderstandings, unnecessary heartbreaks + more will be added as the series progresses!

❧ featuring! all of txt | jimin & jungkook (bts) | sakura & kazuha (le sserafim) | yeji & ryujin (itzy) | keeho (p1harmony) | somi (soloist, ex i.o.i).

❧ playlist! trampoline - zayn & shaed ║ easy - camila cabello ║ lavender haze - taylor swift ♪

❧ status! 23.04.23 ⇢ tba. | on-going | bi-weekly updates

notes! heyyy, guys! yes, rya smau era 2k23 hehe! i had this idea for a very angsty fic where an older reader has feelings for a younger yeonjun but can't accept it bec he's not her "type"... but when i tried to write it, it got soooo sad and heavy soooo fast that i had to give up 😭 SO! i reckoned why not attempt to do an smau w a lighter version of this concept??? let's hope this turns out okay (:

pls be kind! the last time i wrote an smau was in 2018 so my creativity's got rust in every crevice (': but constructive criticism + suggestions are more than welcome! 🫶

❧ main masterlist | inbox ⁘

profiles: [1] [2] [3]

00. intro ║ 01. more nepotism hires ║ 02. grandpa and grandma ║ 03. break a leg (but not yours) [written: 1k] ║ 04. do you like flowers ║ 05. ✨aRtTtT✨ ║ 06. let the boy feel a woman's touch ║ 07. support system ║ 08. liking people we can't have ║ 09. it IS weird ║ 10. ‼ trouble ‼ ║ 11. connecting some big ass dots ║ 12. it's a work in progress ║ 13. dance crush ║ 14. enemies to lovers ║ 15. ohhh my god i'm so stupid ║ 16. at least that’s how it began ║ 17. we're no sidehoe material ❌ ║ 18. jealousy wasn't on my bingo card ║ 19. pesky little feelings ║ 20. why do i know so much ║ 21. it should've been me ║ 22. an overthinker AND a dumbass ║ 23. everything is a mess [written: 500] ║ 24. sum chamgo love dive it is [written: 1k] || 25. feels like a funeral in here ║ 26. let's all act surprised || 27. must start breathing into a bag ║ 28. IDK DUDE IM NERVOUS ║ 29. i wasn't jumping I SLIPPED ║ 30. wdym denial ║ [tba]

taglist: @bailies-me @samisubi @forever-in-the-sky2 @captivq @jiawji @hyuneyeon @wanlore @softcabur @emohazuzworld @yjusei @marifujioka @taekwondoes @suzirumas @ohmahgods @ye0nvibezzn @mrsyawnzzn @rionah

let me know if you'd like to be added!

© yeonboy 2023 // do not steal, copy or repost. respect your local content creators, kaythanks.

[saelterlude]

lc musical clip list pt.4! i'm calling this one, the birthday special!!

(pt.1, pt.2, pt.3, pt.5, pt.6, pt.7 here)

Why is this the birthday special, well because of this:

51. 28/02/2024, Happy BDay Guo Hongxu! I don't usually upload promovid but uhh he's so cool in this one so, here. Sidenote, Shu Rongbo is very hyper and cute this performance. And Qian Anqi's cute english plss i love her.

52. 03/03/2024 night, Happy BDay Zuo Yiping! Watch also, Cao Muzhi penguin walk across the table, Wu Yihan please watch your steps and don't poke other people's cake!!

(funny coincidence, I happen to watch a Santa Lucia/Mio Fratello clip of Cao Muzhi-Wu Yihan just a couple days before this)

53. 10/03/2024 night, Happy Bday Shu Rongbo and Wu Yihan!! Hehe the way Qian Anqi knocks their heads together and insisted to sing them happy birthday is so cute. Wu Yihan said 'Happy Birthday' before their customary Guiding Light hug. And pls someone translate (or at least transcribed) the closing speech for me, there's a lot of laughing involved, I'm curious. Also, have this bonus stage door clip.

Some funfacts. Since last year they play in the same 4 musicals including Link Click and out of those 4 plays they shared 2 roles. Shu Rongbo played a total of 9 roles while Wu Yihan played 7. (Yes, I am at that level of hyperfixation)

54. 11/03/2024, HBD Teng Chunpeng! LMAO It's you, so of course your promo video would be great! His face during the sofa choreo though. And why are both him and Du Guangyi stomping and jumping on the table so hard. You menaces, please you're gonna break it. The couch trio is also looking cute behind them.

Moving on from the birthdays starting with this special one,

55. 11/03/2024 Valentine's day special, <- Official ver. Forgive my language TENG CHUNPENG DU GUANGYI YOU FCKING TEASE! YOU GEM OF A HUMAN BEING! Have this fancam with the superior angle.

(This makes Du Guangyi the first and only actor who have played all 3 roles in that scene. Congrats!)

56. Special Encore rehearsals/BTS! Special mentions to Teng Chunpeng's fashion sense, Wu Yihan's cute act, Ding Xingchen's falling wig, Zhang Jiahao's IDGAF mood, and Wang Minhui's violent tendencies.

57. 26/02/2024, when I say Cai Qi and Wang Minhui have the best dynamic, this is what I meant.

58. 29/02/2024, watch Ji Xiaokun and Guo Hongxu's "Oi!" "Oi."

59. 01/03/2024, Look at them stumbling through singing "Guiding Light" and it's a Wu Yihan-Shu Rongbo duo which means hug! Also Wu Yihan, why are you a menace at holding hands, this time with Zou Ziyue.

60. 03/03/2024 day, why is there a piglet??? Why are you seasoning the piglet??? Why are you stepping on the piglet?? Why is the piglet bowing?? piglet??

61. 04/03/2024, Bai Zhuoming being extra sassy and playful on the couch makes me so happy. Of course Cai Lu also becomes playful in response. Typical Guiding Light mistake also causes Wang Minhui to crack.

62. 07/03/2024, Guo Hongxu putting up the wrong foot and stumbling on the sofa choreo.

63. 07/03/2024, same performance as above, Ji Xiaokun being annoying <3. When other pairs hug, they wrestle.

64. 10/03/2024 day, Mooom! Cai Qi and Wang Minhui are fighting instead of doing rock-paper-scissors again.

65. 09/03/2024 day, uuuhh Wu Yihan sitting on the counter like that with those lights and shadows during Guiding Light is creepy.

66. 09/03/20204 night, love me some Du Guangyi shenanigans, the way he just gives up on the handshake and walk off the table plss and him teasing Deng Xianling during the closing speech. Speaking of, she brings out the bat and forces their arms to form the heart. Then there's Bai Zhuoming being cute and the little shimmy dance he does.

67. 09/03/2024 night, bonus to the one above. Du Guangyi last minute adlib was unexpected but very enjoyable. Also, I love the contrast between his and Bai Zhuoming's tutting.

That's all for now!

Bonus clip with Bai Zhuoming! The song "Number 7" from "Fan Letter" musical is really good, I'm obssesed. But special performance where they're joined by their alternate cast? And his alternate cast is, Shu Rongbo? Even better!! They're kinda in their own world too. Here's a close up. Their voices go so well together!

(I swear they're playing something on that paper, and that makes it 3 musicals I know where they share the same role. Is it time I made a venn diagram?)

so at which point do i admit this brainrot is slowly but surely turning from linkclick focused to actor focused?

[princemick]

sorry for sending this so late after the original ask, but abt the gif process explanation, yes pls!

ofcourse anon!! Ive done some before but it's been a while since I've done a full explenation sooo

KYLE PRINCEMICK'S 2023 BASIC GIFMAKING PROCESS!!

I'm going to explain it all below the tab. I wont go into graphics or colouring I'm just gonna explain how I get to a basic gif like this

and I'm going to break it up into 4 parts:

recording and import

timing

sharpening and size

export

if you follow this it will give you a basic gif to which you can add whatever you want.

I'm going to be using photoshop, OBS and video timeline for this.

1. RECORDING AND IMPORT

so, for recording I use OBS, it's an incredibly useful recording program and my favorite part is that it can record 60 fps which gives me reaally smooth gifs with a lot of frames. here are my personal obs settings.

now you can put your fps down to about 50 without a lot of quality loss if you need to.

then the import

to import to timeline you just drag your video right into photoshop. your workspace should look like this after you do.

to be able to gif you need a videotimeline obviously for that you just go

window -> timeline

when you do that this should pop up and you can just drag that to the bottom of your workspace and it will just snap right into there

2. TIMING

now for timing a lot comes down to what you personally like.

for basic ruules, 25 frames is about one second and the longer and more frames you make it, the heavier your gif will be. I personally keep my gifs to about 60 frames.

you can see how long your gif is with the little timer at the bottom (the 0:00:02:00)

I try not to make my gifs longer then 120 because then the quality will just be horrible and the gifs will be to heavy.

another important thing is how quick you want it to be. because obs records in 60 fps it records it really quick. if you dont change anything and export now this is what your gif will look like

which hey if you like that great, I dont. I like my gifs a lot slower which also makes them smoother and a lot less heavy.

you can change that by clicking on the little play bottom on your video

when you click on that you see this, the 'speed' is where you can obviously, change the sped.

I personally like my speed at 50 which makes the gif look like this instead:

when you do slow down the gif you might notice that the part you wanted to gif is gone, just drag the blue timeline out again because we slowed it down so you need to drag the whole video back out again.

now I like to make my timeline a little shorter and cut out the parts I dont need which again you can do by grabbing the sides of the timeline and move them around

now for my one gif this is what my timeline looks like !

then lasty of this part we're gonna go into

filter -> convert to smart object. now your timeline will turn purple, this is good!

3. SHARPENING AND SIZE

NOW, for sizing, tumblr has rules, the good part. photoshop has these sizes as presets, ig you go into the little sizing icon which looks like this

you have a little tab up in your work space where you have presets.

all of them can obviously be posted BUT tumblr prefers and will make the gifs look the best if you use 5:7 or 1:1

I like using 5:7, for this gif im gonna use 5:7 and add it horizontally, this is what cutting looks like and you can just click enter and it will cut

because you converted it into a smart object you can still move it around in your 5:7 border.

now, tumblr doesnt like gifs that are to big so, you can go into

image -> image size

and there you see this

tumblr prefers gifs that are 700 by 500 so you just write that make sure that little link thingy looks like this

and NOT this

because that little thing makes sure the size stays linked and then you can just change it to 700 by 500

now that your gif is the right size we're going to make it a lot better quality by sharpening you do this by going to

filter -> sharpen -> smart sharpen

everyone has their own preferences and style when it comes to sharpening but I like to use these two

now your video layer should look like this

and your gif should be all nice and crispy! like this:

4. EXPORT

and last but not least, exporting!

you export gifs by going to

file -> export -> save for web legacy

OR you can go alt + cytl + shift + s

when you do that a window pops up and its all about your own settings but these are the ones I use!

you can play around with a lot of the settings until its something you personally like. always remember to click on the little play on the bottom right to check if there are not mistakes in your movement and gif!

and then when you click on save your gif is done!!

that's my basic process from this point I go on to do everything else, I add colouring or text or a overlays, whatever I feel like but this is always the basics!

I hope this was clear and helped yall, I'd love to hear if it helped yall and have fun giffing!!

dont be scared to ask about anything about this process or any of my other process that I do!

[mercurygguk]

Cami a Drabble with risqué jk and niece pls !!

risqué ; timestamp #8

pairing; risqué!jk (ft. his older brother and niece)

genre; FLUFFY MEMORY🥺 (btw poot means fart if anyone wonders hsjskd also, this takes place in between him and oc hooking up the first time and the trip to Dubai)

[9:02 AM] “uncle kookie!”

the sound of small, bare feet padding against the wooden floor in his apartment reaches jungkook’s ears. a gentle sigh escapes him as the sound gets closer, another squeaky call of his name following. soon enough a small human stands in the doorway to jungkook’s home office, big brown eyes staring at him.

he wouldn’t ever be able to resist those eyes… not even if he actually tried.

“u-uncle kookie,” his niece, ellie, tries again. her small fingers fiddles in front of her little chubby tummy and her dark hair is pulled up in a messy little ponytail on top of her head, flopping to one side. the t-shirt she’s wearing is way too big for her but it’s one her father used to wear when he was a little kid himself.

it’s her nightie t-shirt – refuses to sleep without it.

jungkook closes down his laptop and gets up from his seat, heart swelling in his chest when she reaches her arms up to him as he moves closer to the tiny human who’s been calling his name repeatedly. she smiles excitingly up at him as he picks her up.

“morning, poot,” jungkook smiles gently at his niece as he rests her on his forearm, closing the door to his home office before heading in the direction of the kitchen. “did you sleep well?”

ellie nods, a soft yawn leaving her at the mention of sleep. jungkook can’t help but let out a light endeared chuckle as she rubs her eye, sleep obviously still very prominent in her big and brown eyes.

“oh, you managed to get him out of his office,” jungkook’s older brother fakes surprise the moment jungkook and ellie steps into the kitchen. the smell of freshly brewed coffee fills his nostrils instantly, his stomach growling in hunger for coffee and breakfast. “good job, ellie.”

“good morning to you too,” jungkook deadpans, keeping ellie on his arm as he moves closer to the corner of the kitchen where the coffee machine sits. he pours himself a cup and immediately takes a careful sip of the hot liquid, letting out a low satisfied hum as the burnt taste fills his tastebuds.

“me too-“ ellie reaches for the coffee mug but jungkook is quick to hold it out of her reach, shaking his head. she whines in protest. “i want coffee!”

the pout she flashes jungkook would normally make him give in within a heartbeat but it might not be a good idea to give a 3-year-old caffeine at nine in the morning. or at any point of the day actually.

“no, poot, this is uncle’s drink,” jungkook softly tells the toddler as he takes a seat at the dining table across from his brother. he places his mug down, out of reach for his curious niece and reaches for her own cup with juice in it, “you have your own drink right here.”

ellie shakes her head, slumping in his lap in stubborn protest and starts playing with his fingers, the silver rings on them catching her attention. jungkook huffs out a chuckle at her obvious frustration, shaking his head in amusement before reaching for his coffee again.

“you planning on working all day?” his brother asks. “or you wanna spend time your niece?”

jungkook has a lot of different things he should be working on today, sometimes work is easier on Sundays for some odd reason. but as his brother looks at him expectantly, waiting for his decision, jungkook can’t bring himself to choose work over family.

besides, it’s his niece.

he doesn’t see her very often but when he does, all of his attention and time should be reserved for her and her only.

"it can wait," jungkook decides, deciding to ignore the knowing smile on his older brother's face as jungkook turns his attention back to the toddler in his lap. he wraps his hands around her small ankles, her bare feet one of the cutest things he has ever seen. he plays with her feet while leaning down to press a few smooches to her cheeks, causing her to giggle and reach up to push his head away.

one of her tiny hands covers his mouth, stopping him from kissing her cheeks but jungkook only growls playfully and pretends to take a bite of her hand, earning a shrieking laugh from her. laughter bubbles from jungkook's chest, the happiness he feels when his brother and niece comes by and stays for the night unmatched in every way.

"what do you wanna do today, hm?" jungkook asks his niece. "we'll do whatever you want."

"waffles!"

already knowing the answer, jungkook grins in triumph and moves to stand up, throwing her over his shoulder in pure fun. ellie laughs wholeheartedly once again, holding onto him for dear life as jungkook runs off to the bathroom to get her ready for a day in the kitchen. back at the dining table, his older brother and ellie's father watches with an amused smile, shaking his head to himself.

"kids..."

[yuriko-mukami]

I don't know how you'll take it, but can I ask you to do somethiiiing 🥺 I know it's up to you, but eeeeeeem yeah, I want you to write it pls?? 🙇‍♀️No pressure ofc!

https://www.tumblr.com/higaneion/735538696458223616/reblog-this-post-and-add-your-5-favorite-lines?source=share

reblog this post and add your 5 favorite lines you've written this year by @higaneion

Sorry for not reblogging but I wanted to answer this ask.

Hello Anon,

and thank you so much for this ask. You have no idea how happy it made it. Writing is so close to my heart; speaking about it means a ton.

So, yes, I totally wanted to do this. I'm sorry it took me a while, but it's a difficult task to pick up my favorites, especially, since I have written a lot this year. I decided to include only my fanfics... and still, it was tough. I honestly think that every line works better in the context, but it can't be helped... I added the links to the stories, though. Also, I realized that sometimes I write damn long sentences... 🤭

5 Favorite Lines I Have Written in the Year 2023

1️⃣ Yuriko wasn’t able to see it but it was almost like she could feel how the red thread of fate grew from her heart towards Ruki, tying them both with an everlasting bond.

The Eternal Flame and Blood

2️⃣ But she was glued into this moment of pure desire, wanting to give herself there and then without understanding why were her mind and body suddenly singing foreign songs of bliss and pleasure.

The Curse of the Blue Moon

3️⃣ She almost expected him to pull it, but he simply held her head, surrendering to the blissful smooch that felt like tying their heartstrings back together.

His Possession: Ecstasy 05

4️⃣ At the same time, his thumb never stopped but circled her pulsating pearl until she could not do anything but surrender the sweet sensation that sent heated shivers from her core to every single cell of her body, filling her mind with gratifying rapture and covering the view from the mirror with tiny, sparkling stars.

His Possession: Ecstasy 02

5️⃣ But it was already there, and under it that scrimp-like bean whose heart had sung a love song for him just a couple of hours ago.

His Everything

[glacierheart]

you were born, bluer than a butterfly. beautiful & so deprived of oxygen, colder than your father's eyes. ❄

you were born, reachin' for your mother's hands ... VICTIM of your father's plans to RULE the world. too afraid to step outside, paranoid & petrified what you've heard.

THE TALE OF THE HEIR OF JACK FROST . son of the ice king . an original character crafted from the son to a villainous jack frost & a concoction of a summer personification heroine for a mother (aestas) to create an elaborate story of choosing between good and evil, being the embodiment of both sides of the moral alignments. a character born with bad and GOOD ingredients.

delving into how a potential villain becomes an ANTI-HERO. themes of chasing for a controlling father's approval, child neglect, trust issues and abandonment issues. stepping outside of his mother's good will & turning down a dark path (before getting back onto the good one). teetering on the fine line side of wrong and right. the savior or the villain? feeling a void from a broken heart and a cold childhood. needing a reason to be good. icy eyes, warm heart. living behind a facade. pretends to not care, but deep down .. cares a lot. protective. a prankster, morbid humor, sarcastic and witty. emotional and unpredictable.

based in the world of : DC, DISNEY / DISNEY'S DESCENDANTS, THE HUNGER GAMES, STRANGER THINGS, WEDNESDAY AND A MODERN WORLD VERSE.

name origin: caspian theros frost. caspian, meaning, 'white' like snow. and theros meaning an old greek name of 'summer' & his last name frost– after his father jack frost. his name is a combination of winter and summer, just like his parents.

memes. / open starters. / verses are under cut. / rules are under cut.

rules.

01. mun is 21+.

02. i am not based in just one verse, so pls– if you're not into the disney, thg, st, wednesday or dc/marvel world(s) then keep in mind i do have a normal modern world verse setting!

03. be mindful of triggering themes such as blood, death, drowning or child abuse on this blog. caspian was grown up with a very toxic, abusive father– so it'll be difficult to avoid mentioning these themes at times.

04. i am super welcoming of other oc characters and canon characters, i love them all.

05. i love different fandoms and crossovers, so do not hesitate to write with me if you apart of fandoms i may have not even mentioned on this blog yet.

06. if you follow me, pls feel free to reply to any of my opens or send in memes at any time! there's no expiration dates on those. if you're the type that loves to plot, then def come to my IMs but keep in mind i'm not the best at plotting until i get an idea flowing.. so coming to my IMs with an idea already in mind is your best bet if you'd rather plot !! <3

07. i ship with chemistry so no force shipping or godmodding, pls. <3

verses.

disney / disney descendants verse. the lost winter prince. caspian frost is the son to mother summer & father winter that are apart of their own separate seasonal kingdoms in auradon. when a combination of a warm hearted young woman and an ill-tempered, glacier hearted man wed and share a child they get both of their natures intertwined. the ice king had a skill for perfect persuasion– so charming and manipulative. he found grand interest the mother of warmth, aestas or as she liked to be called florence. the queen of summer is adorned with nothing but radiant waves, a symbol of abundance and prosperity. her presence heralds the arrival of the season of warmth, light, and growth. aestas is revered for her power to bring forth the earth's bounty, nurturing the land and its inhabitants with her life-giving energy. as the embodiment of summer, aestas represents the joyful and vibrant spirit of the season, inviting all to bask in the warmth of the sun's embrace. so what did father frost want, with a woman the complete opposite of himself? to destruct all of that, use florence as his greatest challenge to glaze over her summery heart, turn her on his side of all things glacier and then make her the queen of the winter kingdom. the ice king became very charming on his ploy to wrap himself around mother summer's heart. perhaps, kind deeds and months worth of finding out jack frost's romanticizing side had created a soft spot in her heart. perhaps, a warm spot... had melted a small hole in his frozen heart itself whether he wanted to remain in denial of that or not. perhaps, that's what fueled his anger all the more in the end. he promised to wed her, have the child she always wished for, jack frost was certain he had the queen of summer delicately wrapped around his icy finger. but when she wouldn't join him and his winter kingdom after understanding his scheme all along, to get her to join forces with him, he took it bitterly and hatefully because in his mind... he really thought she wouldn't 'betray' him then froze her over when she least expected it. caspian was a newborn and never learned the true events of what happened to his mother all from his father's manipulations and lies he fed the young frost. how his mother had abandoned them both and ran off with a new family because he simply wasn't good enough. his father took him under his wing and tried to mold caspian as his last option to being the future ruler of the winter kingdom one day. the ice king is equally as a controlling father as he is a ruler and eventually into caspian's teen years... he begins to find that out the more caspian strays off his father's plan and path of destruction the more he pries into how his mother was like the more demanding his father becomes. and the day he finds out how she really died, is the day the winter kingdom brews an ugly storm and a terrible argument between father winter and his child of winter that unfortunately held the eerily identical anger in his eye as his mother summer had the day she wished to 'betray' him. caspian's only choice left was to flee in fear he would kill him too... during that journey he ends up on the ISLE OF THE LOST. in this verse, caspian does possess a few powers as both of his parents have them. (all inheriting from his father, however.) he can create tiny snowflakes from the tips of his fingers. he has a special white rose that could be used for bad or for good, one touch of it and he can either create beautiful icy rose sculptures – or one drop – and freeze over endless acres of land. he posesses cryokinesis: ability to control temperature and moisture in the environment, which he can generate ice and cold. however, he doesn't have total control on his abilities and his volatile emotions of sadness and a lot of anger have a lot to do with how well he can control them.

the hunger games verse. the president's son: the hunger games. going entirely au for this by sort of reinventing the snow's with the frost's. the difference is unlike coriolanus, caspian has a long run battling between doing the right or wrong thing and inevitably chooses the right decision to scheme a plan to end the hunger games since the other difference is he's the presidents son. son of president frost. but – until then, his morals can come across skeptical. it's easy to assume what he may be like if going anything by his dictator father (which caspian despises). is he a bad person like mr. frost or has he taken a good streak after his late mother? getting accused, categorized in with his father, looked at as the next monster in line... sometimes makes him have difficulty believing he's any thing less. that's something that can certainly get in the way of trying to be a good person. especially with the brainwashing's of his father to topple on top of that. but there's a secret to still be unrevealed, something happened a long time ago when his mother tried to make a good impact on his father and out of anger of his mother's attempt to turn him good... he found a way to rid of her. all these year's caspian's believed a rebel is the one who did it but the day he finds out it was his father all along; things drastically change among that newfound betrayal.

wednesday verse. (to be written) ..

stranger things verse. (to be written) probably will be a test subject type thing, if i don't change my mind.

dc & marvel verse. anti hero. for this verse i may base him off delores winters son. but this is also to be decided and written!

modern verse 1. the president's son: modern day. in modern day setting, caspian winters lives an unordinary life as the son to the united state's president mr. jack winters. his entire life he's been shoved into politics, even if his mother, the kinder parent– has gave the best of her ability to allow him to live as a normal child. still, growing up with zero siblings and a small group of friends has created this loneliness inside of him he wishes he didn't have. sometimes he yearns for an escape from all of it all while the pressure to be next in line to take the throne is shoved down his throat.

modern verse 2. the mayor's son: modern day. this modern verse allows me to write caspian in more of a normal setting. his father's still able to be some kind of man in power, but he's allowed to live more typically and hide in the shadows better. attending university in his home city of chicago, in a band on the side, keeping up with his love for theatre. caspian's definitely always been that theatre kid. it's the only healthy thing other than his band in his life that keeps him out of his usual trouble he tends to find himself causing or in the middle of. he has a rebellious attitude, that tends to lead him there a lot. always caught on either side of right and wrong with zero positive role models in his life.

[saintmeghanmarkle]

MORE PROOF Omid Scobies Endgame is fake news &amp; lies. Why would Princess Eugenie contact Harry to enquire about the Queens health when her dad was on the flight? Post showing actual timeline of events. Sources: Sinner DailyMail by u/Negative_Difference4

MORE PROOF Omid Scobies Endgame is fake news & lies. Why would Princess Eugenie contact Harry to enquire about the Queen’s health when her dad was on the flight? Post showing actual timeline of events. Sources: Sinner, DailyMail Treat this post as a draft. I am in the middle of editing it. The last version got completely wiped. I hate it when that happens. It gives me so much anxiety. I will be adding commentary to flesh out the post. So pls save and come backThe news article is from the dailymail which can be found here https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12753393/Princess-Eugenie-contacted-Prince-Harry-hours-Queens-death-information-condition-royal-biographer-claims.html​Except why would Princess Eugenie contact Harry for update on the Queen’s health? Especially as he barely saw the Queen in her final days (I think the last visit was in Windsor?), he fell out with the family and no longer lives in the UK. So why would Eugenie ask Harry for updates especially as her father was on the flight to see the Queen?Remember that the Queen wanted to see Harry in her final days and they couldn’t be bothered to travel a few extra miles even though they were in Manchester for One Young Worldhttps://preview.redd.it/gwco6krs1m0c1.jpg?width=1534&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8660a7178ced0f08a66033ff5267afeb9677f6caScobie then claims that Harry was able to get a flight with Andrew and Edward, except that’s not true. The flight was organised for the whole family. Even Sophie was on the flight. The video showing them alighting the plane at Aberdeen airport (the plane took off at Northolt), William is the first to alight and then drives the family to Balmoral. Here’s the video in a Sun articleThen Harry gets a private jet to Aberdeen separately and without Meghan. Yet Omid doesn’t cover why Meghan wasn’t on that flight. Also Harry flew from Luton airport… whereas the rest of the royals flew from Northolt (news.co.au source by Daniela Elser, a sugar?). The article also states that Harry had no idea about the Queen’s healthhttps://preview.redd.it/vsva4prs1m0c1.jpg?width=1561&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=49eeaca5f527e2ac4530efa87a7847405059b268​https://ift.tt/j4ISMtL is how far Harry had to travel to catch his flight after causing drama with Meghan at RAF Northolt. The royals were travelling from Windsor. https://preview.redd.it/eealoacyam0c1.jpg?width=1369&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=82f1f5d293dbf5383e581270b1f330e12980129d​Here’s William driving Andrew to Balmoral… so why wouldnt Eugenie get updates from her dad? At the time, Harry said that he got a phone alert that the Queen died rather than being notified by the familyhttps://preview.redd.it/yrefyyrs1m0c1.jpg?width=1396&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=732a29abdc41e96e78109fe8931214b8f4c50efdA lot has been said about Eugenie and she is a snake 🐍 that cannot be trusted. I dont know why she cannot stand up for herself with these two. Why doesn’t she call out the lies and bad behaviour? https://ift.tt/RvZqT25 to Sinner’s post about the row delaying him and the flight https://ift.tt/XybmNEf post link: https://ift.tt/vjWkZbE author: Negative_Difference4 submitted: November 16, 2023 at 02:20AM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit

[sehodreamsthoughts]

yesss u get me<333

that link oop🫢🫢🤭🤭🤭 yeah i see that for him…(zhang hao) he’s something else in a positive way idk…

tbh i see matthew as a switch right and honestly more of a dom but.. idk idk he really can go either way for me.. but some idols (who i bias🤭🤭) who are definitely subby boys are bnd’s riwoo, lun8’s takuma, nowadays’ yeonwoo, and one pact’s yedam<3333 they’re all 03 liners though coincidentally just so u know, so like def legal but also def younger than some of the idols we’ve talked about but i think matthew is 02 so idk??? anyways i love them all sooo much<3333333 wanted to give them all an honourable mention idk??? OMG and cravity’s hyeongjun pls how could i forget him he reminds me of xiumin a bit n i just love him so much my pookie baby boy!!!!!!!

if u like men who scream daddy issues do u like jiwoong then too? i sound insane but he’s dilf material for sure!!! and wayv’s kun😶😶😶 (he reminds me so much of suho too and i think we both love suho, we’ve talked about that before,,,,, my literal father👀) im just name dropping idols now but also cravity’s serim is just.. u should take a look at that guy i want him BAD n all (h)ours is super new!! most of them are rly young but the leader is 03 n he gives the most Dad vibes n hes so hot plssss his name is kunho and i think you’d like the concept for their upcoming comeback it’s very dark.. idrk how to describe it though like cyberpunk maybe???

okay i’m gonna shut up about other groups now.. cuz i mainly came back here to talk more about sungchan who’s not a sweet tooth n gives u all the food he doesn’t finish.. i always come here to yap about this kink but can’t figure out how to articulate myself, it makes me so dizzy to even contemplate it but.. OKAY WARNING this might be gross n is definitely weird but i think sungchan would be obsessed with the contrast between you two if you were chubbier because he is so athletic and slender, and i think he’s a boob guy… wouldn’t be able to think straight if he could see even the outline of your breasts in your shirt, stretching the material, would go crazier if he could see your soft flesh pushing out the top, watching how it jiggles when you move and laugh and talk and eat<333333333 i think he’d like the control aspect of feeding you too because it’s like.. he can do whatever he wants to u, if he tells you to eat the rest of his snack or what he made you for dinner, you’re not supposed to say no to him, and he can see just how many times you’ve obeyed him when he sees how big you’re getting🥺🥺🥺 again with the damn pinching, and squeezing your ass or your boobs, slapping your butt whenever within arms reach of him!!! grabs your tummy to pull you closer to him or squeezes and pinches your sides just because you look so fucking soft and squishy and he just wants to manhandle you all the time because there’s just so much of you to touch now<3333 again sungchan who buys you revealing clothes and wants you to wear them because he loves seeing your skin exposed, and he tells you how pretty you look all for him<333 such an angel<33 but also sungchan who teases you when his shirt is tight on you, molding around your tummy and difficult to tug down over your thighs :(( so adorable he just has to fuck you right away, sinking into you and telling you don’t worry, he’ll just have to start buying larger shirts<333

putting myself in time out now<333

- 🥟 anon

Baby sorry for the late response I went to search for each of the boys you mentioned and got lost while watching edits 😭

Woah you really know a lot about boy groups, I didn't know any of the 03 boys you mentioned haha, the one I liked the most between them was Cravity Hyengjun, HE REMINDS ME OF XIUMIN TOO HE'S SOO CUTEEEE, I want to give him a fat smooch.

About Jiwoong, I don't know him that much 😭, when I see edits of zb1 not many of him have appeared but I'll pay him more attention to see what I think, I like that he's older than me tho, AND KUN, I LOVE KUN AHSHDSHQHSJDHEHAJSJW HE'S SO DADDY. I feel he'd scold me so good, I'm sure he'd put me in my place in a second and that's something I find so fucking attractive (yo these daddy issues are raging). Oh, and because you mentioned him, I just saw a video of that Serim guy in which he was scolding his members and I'll be honest, I didn't find him attractive at all until i saw all those boys scared... IT WAS SO HOT 🥵🥵🥵 I'll definitely search for their comeback they look like nice guys and after discovering Ateez I'm in a soft spot with boy groups again (yeah I'm in process of becoming an atiny because I've fallen in love with these guys which is really unusual of me since I mostly only follow sm groups 😭)

Goddd Sungchan Sungchan Sungchan

You know what I see too? He obliging you to not wear a bra around him... I have no idea why since I don't really see him like a boob guy, but I feel he'd love, like you mentioned, watching your boobs against the clothes??? I feel he'd love how your natural form without support looks with shirts on, not hiding anything and making obvious when you need him since your nipples get hard 😭, I feel he'd also feed you more because he wants to see that place and your tummy getting bigger and being more difficult to hide with the clothes, simply the outline of your body would drive him crazy 😭😭😭

There's even a particular moment I have in my head and it's with him staring at you finishing a snack he opened, seeing the crumbles falling over the top of your chest and waiting on you to finish so he can clean you and call you messy but he's usually the messy one making you suck him to then lift your shirts and spurt all his cum over your naked chest...

Also I don't know why this came to my mind but I see him being into chubby arms a lot too??? I feel he'd have this idea of boobs softness=plushy arms and he'd squeeze them all the time before you were finally his girlfriend, and you'd have him around you all the time grabbing your arms, walking and holding your shoulder to then trail down, and he wouldn't be able to contain himself pressing his fingers and imagining he's touching your chest 😭 idk maybe I'm just crazy 😂🤪

[sunrenity]

hii could you please give tips on how to find fonts for your fic banner + the the font you have in your tags and navigation page. i also want to know how to find aesthetic pictures like you find them. i also want to know what are the best times to post on tumblr, and i also want to know how do you over come writer's block and get ideas fpr your fics/headcanons. sorry if i am being a bother and sorry for asking too much. pls do ignore me if you dont have time. i am sorry

sure sure!!

01.ㅤFONTS ( banners & tags + navi )

for banners, i use canva, since most of the fonts are free. i use the fonts which i think fit the most and the ones i ike the most etc!! like moontime, dreaming out loud sans, cmu serif, virtual, the seasons, coterie, amsterdam four, ...

for tags and navigation, i use yaytexts. for most of my tags bold (serif) — 𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 ,, cursive (serif) — 𝑒𝑥𝑎𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑒 ,, or bold/cursive (serif) — 𝒆𝒙𝒂𝒎𝒑𝒍𝒆

02.ㅤAESTHETIC PICTURES

for aesthetic pictures i use pinterest. you only have to be specific when you search for something, so that the pictures will match, example: (color/brand) aesthetic, (color) soft aesthetic, (color) vintage aesthetic etc. you can also use moodboards!! (from tumblr or pinterest)

03.ㅤPOST TIMING

understanding your audience is crucial. especially knowing when they are most active. for example, i usually post around 12:25 pm due to my school schedule, but yesterday i tried posting around 6 pm (as i'm having vacation and basically sleep till 12 pm now...), which seemed to work well. but i'm still figuring out the best time for me. you should also try posting at different times and see when you get the most notes in a specific period of time, ( like an hour or two ). this will help you determine when your readers are most active.

additionally, consider self-reblogging your posts. i typically self-reblog 6 to 9 hours after the original post to reach other time zones and maximize visibility.

04.ㅤWRITER'S BLOCK

when i get writer's block, i make myself write at least five sentences. this way, i have something to build on when i return to writing. additionally, i jot down even the smallest ideas, whether it's just a word or a sentence, in my notes. this ensures i don't forget them and can hopefully develop them later.

or i leave it in my notes for months and slowly forget about it... 😁

another helpful strategy is to read more of others' work. this can inspire new ideas for your own writing. (It's helped me a lot !!)

05.ㅤINSPIRATION

you can find inspiration from songs (lyrics can help you, you should also pay attention to the themes and narratives in your favorite songs, as it may help), prompts or movies etc, even from your own experiences

i hope this helped anonnie !!

[wonfilms]

Hi hi!!

I just wanted to ask for some advice (if it counts as that and it's totally up to you if you want to reply this or not!!! No pressure at all (SERIOUSLY))

It's regarding interactions and asks.

I always feel bad/guilty etc when I drop in for an ask or two and then in a way ghost/lurk afterwards because it feels like I'm not able to reciprocate the affections (if you will) or enthusiasm all the time like some other mutuals/followers/anons can so idk it makes me not want to approach any writers because I can't match up to the energy of their other followers/mutuals/anons (or at least as often as they do) okay tbh I'm not really sure how this was supposed to go but I am very sorry you had to read word vomit!!!

REGARDLESS OF THAT!!!

I HAVE BEEN REALLY ENJOYING THE AMOUNT OF LINO ON YOUR BLOG SINCE FOLLOWING AND IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU FOR YOUR FOLLOWING MILESTONES. I ALSO REALLY ENJOY YOUR WORKS!! THEY'RE SO COMFY THOUGH IT DOES MILDLY GIVE ME WHIPLASH WHEN IT DOESN'T GO BY AGE HAHAHA BUT THAT'S JUST ME. YOUR INTERACTIONS WITH EVERYONE IS WONDERFUL TO SEE AND ENERGY I REALLY ASPIRE TO HAVE BUT fatigue is a silent killer or maybe it's just me feeling the age.... (PLS IM NOT THAT OLD IM AN 02 LINER INCASE YOU MISUNDERSTOOD) PLEASE REMEMBER TO EAT AND STAY HYDRATED AND REST WHEN YOU NEED TO!!! IT MAKES EVERYTHING FEEL BETTER (sort of)

BYEEE have a nice day!!!

YOH NONNIE, PLEASE DON'T APOLOGISE FOR THE WORD VOM I DO IT ALL THE DAMN TIME , IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME THAT YOU POPPED INTO MY INBOX..

DON'T WORRY ABOUT BEING AS ENTHUSIASTIC BABE I THINK PERSONALLY YOU CAN ALWAYS TELL IF SOMEONE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU AND WE WILL ALWAYS RECIPROCATE UR AFFECTIONS ESPECIALLY IF YOU SEND IN SOMETHING THAT WE LIKE!!

ADVICE WISE, I THINK U READY MATCH MY ENERGY TRUST ME LOVE, YOU'RE DOING FINE. I'D SAY IF YOU WANNA INTERACT OR START A CONVERSATION WITH WRITERS SEND THEM A COMMENT ABOUT THEIR LATEST FIC OR LITERALLY SEND THEM PICTURES OF THEIR BIASES, WE WILL LITERALLY GIVE YOU SM LOVE IF YOU DO

HELP UR SO SWEET I LOV U ALREADY. THANK YOU SM FOR SUPPORTING ME AND LOVING THE AMOUNT OF LINO AND MY LITTLE RAMBLES ON MY BLOG WJAT 🥹🥹🥹

I HOPE U HAVE AN AMAZING DAY ANON, I HOPE TO INTERACT WITH U LOTS N LOTS IN THE FUTURE I MISS U ALREADY

[earlgreymon]

headcanon requests, you say? do you have any kenkari headcanons?

kenkari headcanons feel free to interpret these as platonic or romantic! #kenkariwasrobbed

hikari gave ken some hairclips after watching his match one day. she thought it must be a bother playing football with such long (and beautiful) hair, so maybe hairclips would help.

the next day, daisuke called them twin because of the similar haircut and the clip.

so ken started to tie his hair during a match. not that he didn’t like the hairclip; he was just shy.

(and hairclips were so much better than wearing a hat. sorry, takeru…)

in terms of kenyako, hikari was actually the one who helped ken to make a move (or to answer to miyako’s move, because let’s just be real: miyako’s the active one). ken often came to hikari to consult about miyako, even after ken had started dating miyako, and deep inside hikari felt so proud about that. (“hehe, i’m her jogress partner and her best friend—i know her better than mr. boyfriend do!”)

i still believe other than daisuke and miyako, hikari was actually the one who approached ken after the kaiser arc because she felt his struggle with darkness, even though it was still hard for her to apologise for his menace back then. (cue to ep 32 where hikari messaged ken before the kids headed to the digital world)

to be clear, they were not afraid of oceans. be that as it may, at one point in their life, she asked him to go to the beach. they did nothing; just staring at the vast, open water in silence. the ocean was the epitome of darkness for them, so they kinda “train” themselves to get used to it. they learned to suppress the darkness together—maybe “this year, i’ll be brave” was also ken’s mantra, chloe? :p

the beach visit became their routine agenda. every time ken wanted to go to the beach, he would definitely ask hikari too, and vice versa.

among the other digidestineds, hikari was the first one who ask to greet osamu (in japanese household, usually a family had some sort of altar to remember the dead, and one can “greet” the dead by praying in front of the altar). hikari had an older brother like ken, and she couldn’t imagine the burning pain if she lost taichi, hence she wanted to pay some respect.

while in the beginning tailmon was very sceptical towards ken, tailmon then found ken as one of the nicest people ever. being a mature digimon, tailmon really liked to be around someone who was intelligent and could have a meaningful discourse together. tailmon saw ken as one.

on the other hand, wormmon LOVES hikari—but who doesn’t? perhaps because hikari always had this warmth for digimon. if it’s not ken, other than daisuke, minomon only wanted to be hanged in the arms of hikari.

yes, they accidentally bought their mantle at the same place. (if it’s not them going to muji together…)

also, we knew that ken became a heartthrob in college thanks to the newest 02. don’t care what other people said, but i think he would ask hikari to pretend to be his girlfriend once to avoid the fangirl commotion. she was his only option considering miyako was abroad.

ken developed an interest to protect kids after the event with the dark spores. when he studied psychology in college, one of his favourite subjects was child psychology. he conversed a lot with hikari who also took the same class

this was also the reason why, after he became a police, he would drop by around the daycare/kindergarten where hikari worked even though he might not be posted around the area. he wanted to make sure that the kids were safe.

(jk, he actually wanted to see her too)

every year, hikari would pester him to come to the career day as your friendly neighbourhood policeman. he gladly accepted though

(no, he didn’t have the ability to shoot spider web, but he came with wormmon who could shoot sticky nets, so that’s basically the same thing… right?)

[burninlovebutler]

Masterlist🦋💫

~🚧i know this is messy rn pls ignore it is under construction 🚧~

-> Welcome to my Blog Introduction

ao3 - BurninLove

Wattpad - FaultInMyCodes

-> Worship (Secret Santa)* - Possessive-Obsessive!Austin x Fem!Reader

-> Candy Hearts ♡ (vday)* - Sub!Austin x DomFem!Reader

-> Camp Counselors - Pt. 1 + Pt. 2 - Austin x Fem!reader

-> Talkshow Host!Austin Headcanons

Bikeriders Asshole!Austin x Makeup Artist!Reader

-> Pt. 1 *

-> Pt. 2*

-> Pt. 3*

-> Pt. 4.1 *

**last updated; 04.30.23**

-> Pt. 4.2 [coming soon]

-> Pt. 5 [coming soon]

Just an Intern Spotify Playlist ⛓️🖤

𝙸 𝚙𝚞𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚝 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚝𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚘𝚕𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚞𝚣𝚣𝚕𝚎𝚜 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝙻𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚜𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚑 𝚑𝚎'𝚕𝚕 𝚍𝚎𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝙵𝚘𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚐𝚘

Themes: friends to lovers, SLOW burn, ANGST, eventual smut, Austin x fem!oc, midsize oc, sad boi/addict aus, fluffy, semi-AU (indie actor austin)

Summary/Intro: Best friends since college, Austin and Elsie are each other's safety nets. Austin has secrets only Elsie knows, and Elsie has too many closet skeletons for Austin to count.

Austin battles internal demons since the death of his father, which caused a switch to flip that would change him forever. His father’s death happened 4 years ago but it still haunts him – in his mind and in little pills.

Elsie has a weakness for wicked, vile, abusive men. Her boyfriend, Nox, is the latest culprit. And Austin can’t fucking stand him.  

Between trying to rescue each other and struggling to save themselves, is there something lying underneath?

18+ as this contains both smut & mature sensitive topics. Please check TWs for each chapter. General overarching warnings at the bottom of this post.

Since this is slow burn-ish so some themes/smut do not show up until later

Chapters containing smut that have * by their name

Forever Winter Spotify Playlist ❄️💞

FW Chapters:

01 - Has He Texted You?

02 - Dependency

03 - The Close Call Clause

04 - Not The First Time

05 - Fix-It Pancakes

06 - Cold Showers

07 - Giving In

08 - Of Course I Do

09 - Thanksgiving Pt. 1

10 - Thanksgiving Pt. 2

11 - Winter Break

12 - Truth or Dare

13 - Dressing Room Games

14 - Hot or Cold? *

15 - No Touching **

16 - When The Night Ends

17 - Do Not Disturb

18 - Nothing There

19 - Not Even For A Second

20 - I Know You’re Lying

21 - Blue M&Ms

22 - Christmas - Pt. 1 - (ft. The Grinch)

23 - Christmas - Pt. 2 - Comeback Special**

24 - Ski Slopes**

25 - New Years Eve (Pt. 1) - Til You Come Back for More*

26 - New Years (Pt. 2) - Say It Again**

27 - The First Close Call

28 - Temporary Fix*

29 - Be My Mistake*

30 - It's Not Living (If It's Not With You)

31 - Mr. Percocet

32 - [TBA - coming soon]

**last updated 05.31.23**

[more chapters to be announced lol]

Author’s Notes:

Each chapter will contain a related song suggestion and matching lyrics. I highly recommend listening to each song as they beautifully mesh with the themes of each individual chapter.

-

Austin/Elvis yanked me from fanfic retirement so when I started writing FW, I fell in love with the characters & the storyline. I’m posting here so that maybe others can fall in love with them too.

I haven’t written in a while so sorry if it’s a little rusty, especially in the first couple chapters.

This post ended up being really long so sorry if it was a lot, thank you if you made it this far.

I hope you love it, please let me know if you do.

[suguruverse]

— HAIKYUU BOYS WHEN YOU PULL A APRIL FOOLS PRANK ON THEM

includes - suna rintarou, oikawa tooru, iwaizumi hajime and bokuto koutaro

a/n - don’t ask why i posted this a day late but pls enjoy <33

published date - 02/04/21

↳ SUNA RINTAROU

- sick of your bullshit 1.0

- he thought you just making his lunch like you normally do

- he often said that you didn’t need to but he always looks forward to lunch time when he gets to see what you made him

- so today when you made him lunch, he was not suspicious at all

- when he took a bite, he was like why? is? it? so? spicy?

- but he remained calm and just kept eating

- and by the time he was half way through his lunch is was sweating buckets

- his face was red, he was aggressively blowing his nose, sweat was dripping down his face and he was chugging bottles of water like it was nothing

- he didn’t even suspect that it was a prank, just that you have weirdly high spice tolerance

- his teammates were getting a little bit worried, seeing him stick out his tongue like a dog and fanning his face like his life depended on it

- yeah, you guys were gonna have a long conversation at home

- he had just finished his 4th water bottle when he received a text from you

lol text convo - sunas pov

m’lady: how’s the food baby? :)

me: why’s it so spicy

me: it tastes good but i think i’m dying

me: laugh out loud

m’lady: dang i didn’t think it would be THAT spicy

me: huh?

m’lady: happy april fools??

me: fuck you

m’lady: is that a promise?? 🥺🥺

me: shut up i’m crying rn

m’lady: then come home you dramatic bitch

me: i’ll remember this day you damn brat

- in conclusion pranking him sucks and he always gets you back for it

- except his pranks are 100% worse and probably emotionally traumatising

↳ OIKAWA TOORU

- this man istg he is so annoying

- this man is so needy and dramatic

- but that’s probably why you decided to do this

- he just has the best reactions for pranks

- yeah nah i have no idea what you were thinking when you decided to do this

- ditching a date with your boyfriend to hang out with your friends??

- um big mistake

“my love, are you ready for our dinner date yet?”

- yeah you weren’t, babes we going clubbing, but he didn’t know that

- and plus your outfit didn’t really speak ‘fancy dinner’

“oh tooru!! great, i need your opinions! what do you think of my outfit”

“darling, you look absolutely stunning, but a bit much for a dinner date don’t you think?”

“baby what? i’m going out with friends tonight, to the club, but don’t worry, i’ll be home early”

“my love?? we had a date tonight. did you forget? we’ve been planning this for awhile”

“tooru, what’re you talking about? i told you i was gonna go out ages ago”

“oh but-“

“oh shit tooru, i’m late, i gotta go, i’ll see you later okay? see you later my love”

- and you left, leaving your boyfriend heartbroken

- he literally dropped onto the floor clutching his chest hoping you would come home and see him, then cuddle him until the morning

- and there he laid for another 10 minutes in disgust

- how dare you leave your precious boyfriend for your friends

- you decided you were done pranking him so you enter your apartment to your boyfriend cracking open a new vodka bottle

“tooru!”

“oh... it’s you”

“um yeah”

“i thought you were going out with your friends. what? did you finally remember about the date with your handsome boyfriend?”

“tooru”

“no go away, i’m mad”

“april fools tooru”

- when i tell you this man gave you the biggest side eye

“hmph i knew that, i just wanted to see how far you would take the prank”

“okay baby, sure you did”

“pfft darling, don’t underestimate your lovely boyfriend, so come on let’s go”

“go where”

“cuddle, obviously, i still haven’t forgiven you”

- 4/10 dont prank him, he’s annoying

↳ IWAIZUMI HAJIME

- sick of your bullshit 2.0

- he swears you’re gonna give him grey hairs during his 20’s and let’s be honest you probably are

- he just worries about you too much

- he hates seeing you hurt, sick, stressed or just uncomfortable in general

- so you were hella cruel for doing this to him

*massive thud noise lol idk*

“OW, haji, HAJI it hurts please hurry it hurts so bad”

- all of a sudden your boyfriend becomes an olympic sprinter

“doll? what’s wrong baby? did you fall? is your ankle okay? do you want me to get ice? call an ambulance?”

“haji, please i don’t know, it just hurts so bad. please make it stop”

“doll it’s okay, just breathe, can you do that for me pretty girl?”

“mhm”

“good girl, it looks like you sprained your ankle, i’ll go get some ice, okay doll?”

“please hurry haji, it hurts a lot”

“it’s okay, i’m sorry, i’ll be back super quick”

- you were gonna cry, your boyfriend was being so cute and considerate

- yeah well wait until he finds out this was a prank

- in less than 2 minutes, he came running back with an ice pack

“here doll, does this feel better?”

“mhm, thank you haji, i love you”

“i love you more, c’mon i’ll carry you to the couch”

- ugh what a man

“hey haji?”

“yeah doll? what’s up?”

“happy april fools”

“huh?”

“i’m not actually injured, it was a prank”

iwaizumi: 😐😑😐

“i should have known, you fucking brat”

“hehe sorry, can i have a hug”

“no, hug yourself”

- 202/10 bc he’s husband material and has nice arms

↳ BOKUTO KOUTARO

- babie 🥺🥺

- you always loved leaving him small motivational notes for him and he loves it so much

- he always has the biggest smile whenever he sees a note that you wrote in his lunch or his duffle bag

- but today you put like 391 notes in his bag without him noticing

- so when he arrived at practice, he was hoping to get changed into his gear but was instead greeted with a pile of notes

- he picked one up at looked at it

“you look like the scum between my toes”

- okay that was mean

- so he picked up another

“your armpits smell like blue cheese”

- he could have started crying right then and there

- so he texted you

bo’s pov

me: baby :((

my pretty baby: what’s wrong my love? did something happen at practice?

me: did you put these notes in my bag? :((

my pretty baby: i did!! happy april fools baby!!

my pretty baby: did you not like it?

me: it was mean, should i read all of it?

my pretty baby: i spent all night writing it so yes

my pretty baby: but you don’t have to if you don’t wanna, some of them are really weird and mean

me: no i wanna, you worked hard on them!!

my pretty baby: are you sure? they might hurt your feelings

me: im sure!! im stronger than you think!! :))

- the rest of msby saw some of the notes and laughed

- atsumu texted you about how funny they were

- but sakusa told you to never do it again because he doesn’t wanna deal with bokuto crying ever 

- what a babe

- 827282/10 because he’s such a sweetheart

[kookiestarlight]

Wishing for you; 01 | jjk

➝ Pairing: jungkook x f.reader 

➝ Genre: smut, fluff, angst, established relationship, slice of life, domestic

➝ Word count: 12k

➝ Warnings: strong language, mentions of infertility, pregnancy talk, explicit sexual content; fingering, penetrative sex, mild dirty talk

➝ Summary: you and your husband decide to finally start trying for a baby. It should be easy enough, you thought. But it turns out getting pregnant is a lot harder than you expected.

A/N: I just wanted to write something fluffy and it turned into this...which will consist of two parts. also this is my first time writing smut so please be kind asfhkk. I didn’t have time to edit this so pls ignore any little mistakes, I’ll edit it as soon as I can. anyway, let me know what you think :)

| 01 | 02 |

“Think it worked?” he asks, still a little breathless.

“I don’t know,” you smile, meeting his gaze, “maybe.”

He pulls you closer into his side, embracing you in a warm hug. “I think so. How hard can it be?”

How hard can it be?

You simply close your eyes as you rest your head comfortably on his bare chest, drifting off into sleep. Silently praying for what your heart longs for the most.

You’ve lost count of how many pregnancy tests you've taken over the past few months. Far too many, that’s for sure. Yet the little anxious feeling that forms and bubbles in the pit of your stomach each time you wait for the results to show doesn't seem to ever diminish in the slightest.

The test lies on the bathroom counter, your eyes fixed on it from your place, seated on the edge of the bathtub as you try your best to hold back from biting your nails down to the quick—a habit you seem to have developed during these moments alone.

“You alright in there?” Jungkook’s mellow voice cuts through from behind the door where he's waiting, momentarily pulling you from your restless thoughts. “Are you sure you don't want me to come in with you?”

You rarely told him when you did this anymore. After the first few months of negative results, the fluttering and happy excitement of awaiting them together slowly started to vanish. There’s no reason for him to be waiting with you, unnecessarily getting his hopes up. Not when they always came back negative. 

But this time, he’s waiting.

The past week had been a particularly strenuous one. You had been feeling extremely fatigued and much moodier than usual — which was only a result of the huge loads of work, stress and extra hours you spent cooped up in your office at work.

You’re simply exhausted. However, to Jungkook, your sudden shift in emotions and attitude were a sign that maybe, there could be a chance it finally worked. That just maybe, you’re finally pregnant. 

So now you're here, setting yourself up for disappointment again. Because unlike your beloved husband, you're almost certain there isn't going to be any luck this time either.

“I’m fine,” you answer, checking the timer on your phone. “Just wait there.”

After two long minutes finally pass by, you brace yourself with a deep breath, going over to the sink and picking up the test slowly. But once again, your heart deflates immediately at the result shown on it, and you can’t help but sigh heavily to yourself in sheer disappointment.

No second line. Nothing.

You squint, pulling it closer just in case. But there's definitely nothing there...You can't say you weren't expecting it though. Still, each time you take a test, there’s always that tiny bit of hope fighting somewhere within you, even if you try your hardest to push it away. Because you know it’s always ripped right out, leaving you with that cold, empty feeling you’ve become too familiar with.

You place the lid back on it as you finally make your way back out into the bedroom. Jungkook’s head perks up immediately at the sound of the door and he near jumps to his feet. Eyebrows raising slightly when he asks, “so…?” 

But the look on your face alone gives him an instant answer. He doesn’t even need to ask further. He knows that vacant and disheartened look in your eyes well enough by now. 

Shaking your head, you toss the test on the bed beside him, not saying a word as you walk right past. He picks it up and studies it closely anyway, exhaling silently to himself after seeing the lonely line with his own eyes before placing it back in its place carefully, his hands shooting to rub wearily over his face. He really had a feeling it was it this time.

Why is it not working? The job is simple enough...he doesn't understand what he’s doing wrong. 

Jungkook is usually fairly good at hiding his disappointment. You still catch a glimpse of it flash in his eyes every time, like you do right now. Still, he always tries to let hope overpower the disappointment that comes with every failed attempt. Reassuring you with encouraging words and affection. Though it’s obvious the hope is slowly beginning to run thin on his side too with every negative result that keeps coming your way.

He makes his way over to you, cautiously reaching out for your arm. “I'm sorry,” he whispers with a sense of guilt, gently pulling you towards him for a hug. But you’re hurt, tired, disappointed — again. Even feeling slightly bitter at him for making you take the damn test. So you move away, missing the small twinge of hurt in his eyes as you turn away from him, grabbing the test before heading back over to throw it in the bathroom trash.

When you make your way back to bed, he sits close to you, letting out a little sigh before speaking. “Baby, we can keep trying.”

“What’s the point Jungkook? I’m not getting pregnant. It’s not working.” You snap.

“It just hasn't worked yet, but it will. You’ll get pregnant.” He reasons, trying to remain positive. However, his words only manage to irritate you further. You've been trying for months now. You keep track of your ovulation on that calendar app that’s supposed to be so great and have sex whenever it notifies you to. You eat healthier — even cut back on caffeine and started taking those prenatal supplements you once heard your friends rave about. You try everything, but you’re still not getting pregnant.

You know it's not his fault. That you shouldn’t get yourself worked up and lash out at him when all he ever wants to do is help and be there for you. But lately, with how much pressure you’ve been putting on yourselves with this, it’s more often than not you find yourself feeling tense and touchy. And it’s during moments like these you can’t help but let out your frustrations and hurt on him. You don't mean to, but it’s just getting harder over time and your emotions are slowly starting to get the best of you.

Why is it so hard for you when it seems so easy for everyone else? Everyone seems to get pregnant like it’s nothing. What are you doing wrong?

“I’m going to sleep,” you tell him quietly with a resigned shrug, pulling the covers over yourself as you turn on your side to face away from him, and once again Jungkook is left sitting there, feeling helpless. 

He wants this. He wants this just as much as you do, and it causes him hurt too that it’s not happening. But mostly, it pains him to see you so upset and disappointed time after time. He hates how it always lingers for days and he can’t seem to help you.

He slips into his side of bed, turning off the light on the nightstand. Just a few seconds after you feel him scoot closer until he’s pressed up against your back, hooking his arm around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder as he plants a chaste kiss on your skin. Somehow, it manages to instantly relax you, sending a small wave of calmness over you. In a way only he can.

The thing is, you love Jungkook—no, you absolutely adore him. You wouldn’t have spent the past seven years of your life stuck to his side otherwise. Neither would you have taken him up on that offer to marry you just over year ago. Or spent the last eleven months trying to start a family with him.

It was eleven months ago when you decided you were ready to start trying for a baby. You both wanted kids at some point, that’s something you both knew you wanted together long before getting married. You had always longed to become a mother someday, even from a young age. And that desire only became stronger and was completely solidified for you after you met Jungkook. You wanted to start a family with him. You couldn’t wait for the day it finally became a reality. So after getting married, and after many long, late night conversations in bed, you both decided you were very much ready for that step, and you started trying.

You both thought it would be easy. That you'd finally ditch your birth control, track your ovulation and you'd get pregnant pretty quickly. Simple enough, right? That’s what you always imagined. Although that doesn’t seem to be the case whatsoever...at least, not for you. After prolonged months of trying with no luck, you’ve started to doubt if it’s ever going to happen at all.

“I’m sorry, Y/n.” His quiet words suddenly break the silence in the room and go straight to your aching heart, crushing it that tiny bit further than it already is. 

He shouldn't be apologizing. It isn’t even his fault, and it pains you to think he feels that way.

A feeling of regret quickly seeps into you, and after a silent pause, you take hold of his hand and pull it over to your chest tightly, right over your heart. Holding it there as you let him intertwine his fingers with your own. They fit so perfectly.

“It's not your fault, Jungkook,” you whisper, feeling guilty for being so cold with him just moments ago. “I'm sorry.” Pulling his hand up to your lips, you place a kiss on his knuckles. 

“Maybe it is though?” He speaks quietly after a moment's reflection, and you turn around to face him, looking into his dark eyes that are lacking their usual spark. 

“Why would it be your fault? Don’t be silly,” you shake your head, adjusting your pillow as you meet his eyes, reaching out to stroke the side of his neck.

“I don’t know, I mean- I must be doing something wrong...maybe my sperm fucking suck or something,” he shrugs a little, his tone more lighthearted, but still not completely joking. His gaze drops to your intertwined hands between your chests until they dart back to your face, looking a tad more serious than just before. “Maybe there’s something wrong with me. Perhaps...I should get some kind of test done? You know, just in case. See a doctor or something.”

“Kook...there’s nothing wrong with you,” you tell him softly, taken aback by his sudden suggestion. Since when has he been thinking that?

“How can we be sure?” He presses, fixing you with a serious stare, but the only response he gets is silence as you contemplate his words. 

It's not like the thought hadn't crossed your mind at one point. Though, you’d quickly brushed it away—too scared to even think into it. You didn't even want to think there could be anything wrong with either of you. You're both young and healthy…Why would anything be wrong? But now that he's saying it out loud, it makes you think...What if there is? Maybe, there is a reason why you're not getting pregnant, and the thought quite frankly terrifies you.

You don’t give him a response, simply cause you’re not sure what to say. But he can already see the way you’re racking your brain, lips tugged into a taut line as you avoid his eyes.

“Baby, I’m not saying something is wrong, it’s just...maybe-”

“No, you’re right,” you begin. “We can’t be sure. but in that case, we both should see a doctor. Just in case,” You cup his cheek, turning his expression softer. “It could be me.” As much as the thought makes your stomach stir uncomfortably, it’s definitely a possibility.

Sensing your nervousness, he gives your hand a gentle squeeze. “I think that’s a good idea. Even though nothing is going to be wrong, maybe we can just get some advice.” 

You nod weakly. He’s right. Getting an answer these sudden doubts will put you both at ease.

“I’ll get an appointment for us then.” You settle, still a little weary of the idea but now that the doubt has been planted in your head, you need to know. He pulls you into a tight hug, flush against his hard chest. 

“Okay,” he whispers, running a soothing hand down your back as you nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck. Wrapping your arms around him, chasing his comfort. “I love you.”

He presses a kiss to your temple and you hug him tighter, suddenly feeling most of your worries wash away under his warm embrace and his familiar scent that feels like the safest place on earth.

“I love you too.” You promise as you shut your eyes.

The white walls and bright clinic lights are a little too strong on your tired eyes, already forging a subtle headache. The waiting room is quiet, with just a few people scattered about in the uncomfortable, hard plastic chairs. You can’t help but wonder if any of them are feeling as nervous as you are right now.

Jungkook is sitting on the seat right beside yours, tapping away at his phone screen as he entertains himself with some silly game you don’t ever recall seeing him play before.

You had finally managed to get an appointment for you both at the same time with the specialist, which was a relief. With your busy schedules, it had been hard to align your appointment so you could both come in together. Just in case there was any kind of bad news today, you wanted him by your side, just how he wanted to have you there too.

To say you’re nervous would be an understatement. You barely even slept the previous night and had instead spent it filling up your mind with thoughts and assumptions that did nothing to benefit you. If anything, they had only contributed to the unsettling nerves that now take over you.

What if for some reason you and Jungkook really couldn’t have kids? Or what if he really was the one that couldn’t? What if you were the problem? What if... something was wrong with you? All those daunting questions that had kept popping into your head non stop hours ago have now returned and have your stomach in knots. They’re scary thoughts you never really thought you’d be dealing with. But now you are, and it’s much worse than you could have imagined.

“I’m nervous.” You finally announce only loud enough for Jungkook’s ears, leg bouncing anxiously in a repeated manner against the hard floor. Jungkook's head immediately perks up at your words, like he was waiting for them. He slots away his phone swiftly in the large pocket of his hoodie before reaching out for your thigh, placing his hand over it gently to stop the incessant tapping.

“I know you are, baby. Me too.” He says, meeting your gaze. 

“You don’t seem it.” You retort, eyes trailing to where he had just put his phone.

He frowns a little, now taking your hand into his. “C’mon, I just think it’s better to not overthink it so much, so I was just distracting myself a little.”

He’s probably smarter than you for that. You’ve always been a victim to the habit of overthinking, and he knows that. But right now, how could you not? The uncertainty of it all has been looming over you like a dark cloud since that night you agreed to this. And it all only grew scarier the second you set foot in this place.

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. You’re right,” you shake your head. But as you lift your gaze from your intertwined hands, you spot a woman walking out of a nearby room with a tiny baby cradled in her arms. Your eyes unconsciously follow her, and you can physically feel your heart sinking a little.

Why is it that you can’t stop spotting babies and children everywhere you go now? Or at least, you never really took notice of it before. It almost feels like the universe is just rubbing it in your face, honestly. Maybe, you’re just getting a little obsessed and paranoid. Because for some reason, it hurts more than it ever should, and you long so badly to be in their place.

It doesn’t take long at all for Jungkook to take notice of what your eyes are fixated on, and it’s like he can already hear every thought in your mind. 

“Hey,” he grabs your attention as he shuffles in closer, lifting your hand up in his and bringing it up to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss there. “Whatever happens, I’m here. And I love you, mhm? No matter what. We’re in this together. Everything’s going to be fine, don’t worry.”

You know he means the words he says, and it only makes you love him even more. No matter what, he always manages to ease up your bouts of anxiety and reassure you, and your heart can’t help but fill with gratitude and love.

You finally look at him, taking in his warm smile and loving eyes and you’re invaded by a realization, he really looks adorable today, somehow more than usual. His hair tousled and fluffy since he didn’t bother styling it after his rushed shower and he’s wearing his glasses today, framing his beautiful features and bright eyes. His upper body drowning in his big, extra soft burgundy hoodie that makes you want to cuddle him to no end. 

Maybe you should have been staring at him this whole time instead, because it truly would have worked wonders as a distraction.

Smiling back, you offer a small nod in response before leaning in to give his rosy lips a quick peck that is instantly followed by a second one that he returns. “I love you too.”

He flashes you that soft smile once more, and pulls out his phone from his pocket again, holding it out to you. “So...want to play?” He asks quietly, making you chuckle. And of course, you can’t deny him.

Shortly after your names are being called. The appointment goes surprisingly well. The doctor starts by asking you a bunch of personal and intimate questions and you get some of the simple necessary tests done and then booked in for another two appointments. After the final one, you should have an answer. It’s what you had expected, but you thought the process would maybe be a little quicker. This only means you have to wait at least another two weeks of uncertainty.

“Come on, relax,” Jungkook says, his hand reaching over to give your thigh a pat followed by a gentle, comforting squeeze and smile as he shifts to unbuckle his seatbelt with the other. In your usual nervous fashion, it had been bouncing away once again the entire car journey, making him conscious of the growing nerves you were attempting to keep hidden.

You whine in response, pressing your hands to your face before shooting him a nervous glance. “What if your father asks me to try some of his new fancy wine again? Am I supposed to say no?” 

Jungkook simply chuckles at your overthinking thoughts, turning in his seat to face you with a little mocking smile. “Yes.”

He knows you’ve never been capable of to saying no to that lovely man. Not when he shares the same precious smile as the man currently beside you and so deeply cares for your feedback and opinion on his ever growing collection of expensive drinks. 

“I already said no last time. Jungkook, your mom is going to think I’m pregnant if I don't drink anything at dinner,” you explain as you cross your arms over your chest, letting out a quiet sigh as you sink down further in your seat. Specifically remembering that one time a few months ago when you politely declined a drink and she freaked out in excitement and made a huge deal out of it, completely convinced you were hiding a pregnancy from her. You’ve never been one to decline a drink.

You’ve visited Jungkook’s parents countless times over the years. The visit is not what you're feeling edgy about at all. It’s the fear of the topic that might be brought up—it’s the last thing you want to talk about these days. And for your own good, you desperately need to keep it off your mind.

“I’m not drinking either,” he reminds you with a shrug, which isn’t a lie. Surprisingly, Jungkook had been taking this ‘no alcohol’ thing just as seriously as you.

“So? She's obviously not going to think you're pregnant cause you don’t drink. But she will think I am if I don't.” You deadpan, rolling your eyes, causing him to let out a small laugh.

“Look, we’ll just tell them we’re not drinking anymore. You know, trying to be healthier. Don’t worry about that.” He reasons.

You consider his words for a second, turning your head to stare at the driveway of the familiar house ahead. You’re probably making a big deal out of nothing, but you just really want to keep the topic away at all costs tonight. 

After a minute, you finally unbuckle your seatbelt with a heavy sigh, but before you get out of the car, you're stopped by Jungkook's hand taking a gentle hold of your arm.

He’s aware of how sensitive you are to the whole baby topic—especially right now, when you were still waiting for results from your appointment with so many doubts and fears harbored in your mind.

“Don’t stress, okay? I’m here with you. Let’s just have a nice time.”

“Hello, sweetheart!” Jungkook's mother beams, bright and melodious as she comes forward to embrace you in a tight hug. “You look beautiful!” She compliments, wearing that heartwarming eye smile that resembles her sons, grasping your hands as she ushers you into the house. You return the wide smile as you thank her. You're just wearing a pair nicely fitting jeans and a white silk blouse, but she's always ready to gush about your beauty. Bless her.

She smiles, moving on to Jungkook who trails in right behind you, greeting him with a hug just as strong.

Jungkook keeps his arm around your waist as you make your way into the cozy living room. The smell of delicious food fills your nostrils instantly, making your stomach growl in anticipation. Jungkook’s father jumps from the sofa enthusiastically at the sight of you, and he’s just as lovely and welcoming as always. 

“Oh- we have a little surprise guest by the way,” his father announces with a smile as he sits back down on the sofa beside you both.

“Uncle kookie!” The familiar little voice rings in your ears as if on queue, making you both snap your heads around to where you then spot your little nephew running out of the kitchen towards your husband, crashing right into his arms with a big toothy grin when he stands to twirl him around in a big hug.

“Hey, buddy!” He beams, eyes wide with surprise, ”what are you doing here?”

“Your brother dropped him off earlier, Yebin and him both had to rush off for something work related I was told.'' Your mother in law jumps in to explain with a little disappointed shake of the head, but her expression quickly morphs into a smile when the small boy giggles at the tickles his uncle attacks him with. Nonetheless, she's always delighted to babysit him. 

Jungkook just nods in understanding, putting the boy back down onto his feet, albeit he doesn’t let him go that easily.

You watch them both as your husband wraps his arms around the small boy in a cuddle and plants a kiss atop his head. Your heart melts at the sight. He's always so incredibly sweet with him. You can’t help but let your mind wander to the thought that he would be a great dad—you know it. That’s why your heart aches when you think about the fact you just can’t seem to make it happen. You just wish you'll be able to witness this soft, precious side of him with a child of your own someday. 

“Auntie Y/n!” The boy wriggles out of Jungkook's arms and runs up to you next, hugging you with so much force it almost makes you stumble.

“Hi cutie, I’ve missed you!” You giggle at his cute behavior as you kneel down to his level, bopping his nose.

“Dinner won’t be ready for a little while yet so get comfortable, but for you Eunwoo, you had dinner at home, so it’s bedtime soon,” Jungkook’s mother warns. The little boy pouts, hugging you tighter in a small act of defiance, unwilling to let go and Jungkook laughs at his expression. His heart warms at the way you hug him back and talk to him so lovingly, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. He knows you’ll be a great mom. If only he could make it happen.

It’s a little while later when you're all settled at the dinner table emerged in pleasant conversation, save for your nephew who has already been put to sleep by you and Jungkook, much to his dismay.

Dinner is wonderful, the food is beyond what you expected—which was already a lot. Catching up with Jungkook's parents is lovely as it is every time, and in those moments it's almost like none of your worries exist.

“He's adorable,” you giggle around a mouthful of food. Eunwoo’s antics being the latest topic of conversation.

“Oh he is, an absolute angel,” Mrs. Jeon smiles. “He’s already getting so big,” she sighs and shakes her head in disbelief. You nod in agreement, thinking to yourself how it really does feel like he was just a baby yesterday.

“So, when are you two giving me a grandchild?” She asks out of the blue with a proud smile, leaning forward on her forearms, glancing between you and Jungkook expectantly. 

The question makes you instantly tense, swallowing hard before you’re quickly forcing a smile on your lips, pausing to take a drawn out sip of your water. Her husband scoffs a laugh as he keeps digging into his food, not half as interest in nagging about the topic as his wife.

But of course. There it is. The topic you had so strongly been hoping to avoid tonight. Thrown right in your face with no warning. Taking you by surprise despite it not being the first time you’ve heard it. Maybe because this time, you don’t really have an answer to it. You don’t even know if it’s a possibility for you at all anymore. You may never be able to give her grandchildren, but that’s clearly not something you want to announce.

Jungkook shoots you a quick glance, noticing the change in your demeanor instantly, his eyes a little wide as he is also taken aback by the question that somehow snuck up. Thankfully though, he is better at remaining composed than you and speaks first.

“Mom…” He mumbles before swallowing down his food in his mouth, fidgeting with the chopsticks between his fingers. His tone warning but not trying to come across serious.

“What? It's about time isn't it?” She simpers with a chuckle, looking over at her husband for backup who remains focused on his food. 

Jungkook curses internally, hoping to drop the topic as quickly as possible. He loves his mom, but he wishes she didn’t feel the need to bring this up all the time.

“There's no rush,” he says, peering over at you. You’re just nodding with a forced smile, avoiding her gaze and staring at your plate instead.

“You’re going to keep me waiting for years aren't you,” she sighs with a small disappointed shake of her head, relaxing in her seat once again. 

“You already have a grandchild sleeping upstairs,” Jungkook answers, taking a sip of his glass, reaching out to place a comforting hand on your knee under the table with a comforting smile. “And he’s a handful when he wants to be. I think he’s enough for now.”

“I know... But Eunwoo is already getting so big, and another grandchild would be lovely...You would have the most beautiful baby.” She smiles longingly at you both and the room falls silent for a few seconds. Thankfully, she leaves it at that. The conversation quickly resumes when Jungkook’s father changes the subject.

Though now, your stomach feels upset... you feel off, almost like you need to throw up your food. You hate that a simple conversation has the power to change your mood so drastically like this, to make you feel physically ill. And the fact you’re feeling this way over a harmless discussion only makes you feel more stupid.

After a few minutes to not be too obvious, you excuse yourself to the bathroom, in need of a minute to yourself. But just moments later, Jungkook knocks on the door softly and you let him in.

“Y/n…” He begins, slowly closing the door behind him. “You okay?”

“It's fine, I’m okay,” you dismiss, leaning back against the sink. But he knows it’s not, your face at the dinner table was enough to let him know. He’s aware it is a sensitive topic for you — how much you overthink and make yourself upset over it.

“You know what my mom is like...” He reaches for your arms, holding them gently. “I’m sorry.”

“Jungkook, it's fine. It's not the first time she brings it up, and she doesn’t mean any harm.” It definitely isn't. She's been asking that question even before you got married. Back then, you would just laugh it off. But it's different now. Maybe you're being too sensitive — and to make matters worse, you’re also on your period. But the simple question of something you've been longing for so dearly for so long but you don't even know you'll be able to have hurts. 

Jungkook knows this too. He wraps you up in his warm embrace, patting down your hair in a soothing gesture. “I know. I wish she didn’t always feel the need bring it up though.”

“She doesn’t know what’s going on, baby. It's okay, It’s not her fault.” You promise. Feeling glad he came after you. You really needed a minute to yourself and a reassuring hug, specifically from him. “I’m okay, really.” After all, you can’t expect people to avoid it.

You love Jungkook's mother. She’s lovely and she’s always been amazing to you. When you first met her you had been so blown away at how welcoming and loving she was to you. You finally understood how Jungkook is as wonderful as he is — with a mother like that, it made sense. You know she means absolutely no harm by it. But if only she knew…

“Okay,” he breathes, relieved to know you’re okay, even if it’s not to the extent you claim. “No wine but, my mom made cake, your favorite...you’ll have some, won’t you?” 

Feeling lighter, you chuckle against his chest. You've really been trying to eat healthier. Cutting back on all the bad stuff to keep yourself as healthy as possible. But you suppose a sweet treat won't do you any harm. 

“Mhm. You know I can’t say no to your mom’s desserts. Of course I will.”

He kisses your head with a gentle smile and takes your hand in his. “C’mon, let’s go then.”

It’s almost two weeks later when you go in for your second appointment at the clinic. Thankfully, all the test results come back clear. Absolutely nothing pointed to any infertility issues, and you almost want to cry in relief at the doctor's office as you listen attentively, Jungkook's hand holding a comforting grip around yours. According to your doctor, there were no hormonal imbalances or disorders causing a problem, and everything from your physical exams to sperm count analysis had passed with flying colors, proving you were both in great condition. There was no reason as to why you couldn’t conceive naturally.

The doctor simply advises you to be patient and to keep trying, consistently. Emphasizes that you should not stress about the process and to come back in for further testing in another six months if there’s still no luck.

“So, if everything's fine...why is it not working?” You ponder, looking slightly glum before sinking further back in the passenger seat. You’re beyond relieved there's nothing wrong. It definitely felt like huge a weight lifted off your chest to hear the good news, finally putting you both at ease. But it only rises more confusion as to why all your attempts are still unsuccessful.

“We’ll keep trying, baby. It will happen,” Jungkook gives your thigh a reassuring squeeze. “You heard the doctor, we just have to keep trying. And not stress about it,” he warns, shooting you a look as he pulls the car keys out of his back pocket. “Sometimes it just takes time.” 

You gaze out the window to the near empty clinic parking lot, letting out a deep breath. It’s been long enough, you think. But at least now, some hope has been restored. “I guess so.”

“Trying is fun anyway, right?” He teases with a playful little quirk to his lips, eyeing you before you give his arm a half-hearted shove as you bite back the smile, because well...he’s certainly not wrong. But that’s not the point.

You raise a brow. “Do you know how much work sex is?”

He rolls his eyes jokingly as he puts the key in the ignition, before looking over at you again. “Ah, come on. I do most of the work.” 

You blink, displaying dramatized, faux offense in your features. “I've had a weird cramp in my leg for days ever since I rode you, so please shut it, my love.”

He laughs softly, and he looks so handsome you can already feel fondness growing when he leans in closer to you, massaging the exact place on your thigh where you told him it hurt. “That still hasn't gone away?”

Shaking your head, you side eye him. “I literally think I pulled a muscle.”

“But you can’t tell me it wasn’t worth it,” he teases, making you cheeks heat up at the memory and his sinful expressions that are still engraved in the back of your mind. It definitely was worth it. But again, not the point.

“Well, I'll take care of you tonight, won't have to do any work at all,” he promises, voice raspy and so close you can feel his breath on your neck, sending a shiver right down your spine. “Hmm, how does that sound?”

You can’t tame the little smile that forms on your lips, and it’s silly how easily he manages to get you feeling this flustered. “Only if you’ll change and wash the sheets after too?”

He pulls away slightly, and he looks appalled, searching your eyes. “You say that like I’ve never changed and washed the sheets before.”

“If I didn’t push you out of bed after we’d be sleeping on gross sheets most nights so…” Jungkook chuckles as he drops his head.

“Well you know, sex is a lot of work.” He remarks, settling back into his seat and starting the car engine with a smug little shrug. 

“Go on, drive,” you muse with another eye roll, taking your phone from your pocket to check the time. That’s when you spot the familiar notification displayed at the top of your screen. You lift your phone, showing him today's date highlighted on your ovulation calendar app. Giving him a playful smile as you shake your phone with a little wag of your brows.

He chuckles, giving you that beautiful smile that after so many years still gives you crazy butterflies. “Perfect then.” He presses a loving kiss to your lips before driving.

—

The moment Jungkook gets back from work at night, his hands are all over you in an instant, his fiery gaze swallowing you whole as he leads you to the bedroom in a haste— proving to you once again he is indeed a man of his word.

“Baby,” you whisper as he tugs your shirt over your head, tossing it somewhere to the side with the rest of your discarded clothes to be dealt with later.

“Mhm?” He hums against the skin of your chest, pressing wet kisses all the way up to your jaw. You tangle your fingers in the soft strands of hair on instinct— a small whine escaping you as you throw your head back, “I love you.”

He pulls away momentarily, a little smirk tugging at his lips as he marvels at your already blissed out expression. He’s barely touched you. Always so sensitive.

His large hands cup your face, bringing it closer until your foreheads rest against one another— attaching his lips to yours hungrily before answering, “I love you too baby,” he kisses you again. “so fucking much.”

You chuckle against his lips and he gently coaxes you to lay down, parting your legs to accommodate him in between. Your lips meet in a needy kiss once again, tongues darting over each other in a haste. God, you’ll never get tired of the way he kisses you. It’s enough to make you feel completely intoxicated.

Snaking an arm around your back, he unclasps your bra. You gasp when you feel his lips attach to your nipple instantly. Tongue swirling over it again and again until you’re writhing beneath him.

“So gorgeous baby,” he huffs as you arch your back with another contained moan. He says it like it’s the first time he’s seen you like this, he always does— like he’s still trying to wrap his head around the fact you’re all his. Even after all this time.

He trails feather light pecks down to your belly, then your hips, his hands ghosting down your sides until you feel his hands swiftly tug your panties down your legs.

“Jungkook,” you breathe when his fingers ghost over your bare cunt.

“My baby’s needy tonight huh,” he rasps, looking down at you with that devilish glint in his eyes you’re all too familiar with. Making you squirm. Fuck, you need to feel him so bad.

He traces two fingers down to your folds, slowly dipping them into you. “Oh-fuck,” you moan when he presses them deeper, right against that spot he’s an expert in finding. His lips never leave your body as he pumps his fingers in and out of you. He hovers over you as he watches you needily bucking into his hand— soon becoming desperate for more.

“More?” He asks, already knowing your answer.

“Yes,” you beg, bringing a hand down to tug at the waistband of his boxers— your stomach twisting in anticipation when you spot the prominent bulge there, “but these have to go.” You know he likes to take his time with you. Loves the slow build and teasing touches that absolutely wreck you— and you fucking love that about him. But right now, you desperately need him to get to it.

His swollen lips quirk into a smirk as he presses one last quick kiss to your lips, “as you wish.” He shuffles back to rid himself of his underwear, causing you to almost whine at the loss of his warm hands all over you, but you’re soon compensated with the sight of his hard cock, standing proudly against his toned body. Crawling back over you. Although, his eyes widen slightly when you turn around, getting on all fours as you shoot him a teasing glance over your shoulder.

“Fuck baby, this how you want it,” he breathes, kneading at the firm flesh of your ass, shuffling closer until he’s pressed right against your searing skin, his length nestled between your ass as his hands travel up your waist.

It’s not a position you indulge in that often lately —simply because you try to stick to the ones that supposedly increase your chances of pregnancy— but right now, you don’t care. And if the sound he lets out is anything to go by, he’s definitely pleased at your choice.

“I can turn around again,” you tease.

“I think I quite like this,” he rushes, gripping you tighter as he leans forward to kiss his way down your spine, “so hot baby.”

“Well, what are you waiting for?” You pull a pillow towards you, getting comfortable and he almost growls when you lay forward, sticking out your ass further for him. He lines himself up with your soaking entrance, your hands clutch the sheets tightly as you feel the tip breaching you. The stretch so delightful you can’t help but cry out in bliss. He inhales sharply. Fuck, you feel so tight around him. “Fuck, baby,” he moans as he slowly bottoms out, running his hands along your body as he gives you a second to adjust.

“Okay?” He asks gently.

God, you feel so full. You can only nod. Biting your lip as your eyes press shut, “yes. Now fuck me, please.” You beg, hiding your face in the pillow as he chuckles breathily at your eagerness.

Tightening his grip on your hips, he’s swiftly pulling out before thrusting back in slowly.

“Fuck,” he grunts, your body rocking forward as he starts to pick up the pace, the bedroom soon filling with the sinful sounds of skin on skin and your raging breaths.

“Oh—fuck, baby, harder-“ Jungkook doesn’t waste any time, splaying his hands over your back to push further into the mattress, pulling out in a swift move only to slam his hips back into you hard, causing you to almost choke on your words, “like that?”

He leans in, squeezing one of your breasts— eliciting a loud moan from you that has his cock twitching between your walls as you clench him tightly. “Feel so good baby—fuck, you’re so hot,” He breathes hotly against your ear. His tongue darting out to lick the side of your neck and you feel like you’re about to combust. Pleasure burning through your whole body.

All you can do is moan in response as he fucks into you hard and fast— the way you like it. The bedframe begging to creak under your movements, briefly reminding you it’s time to fucking change it. Though you secretly love the sound. You’re not sure your neighbors do though.

“Oh baby,” you moan, your hands gripping the sheets tighter as he pounds into you with so much force it makes you fall flat on your stomach, but he doesn’t stop his pace.

“Ah— Jungkook, so good baby, close,” you warn.

“Yeah? gonna cum for me baby?” He clenches his jaw, dragging your limp body back slightly to snake his hand beneath you, a moan getting caught in your throat as he goes straight to your clit, rubbing two fingers over it mercilessly.

“Come baby, come on my cock,” he pleads, pounding into you as he also chases his approaching high. Sweat making his hair stick to his face.

“O-oh my god, fuck,” you whimper weakly, your mouth falling open, the intensity of your orgasm washing over you like a tidal wave as you let out a near scream, muffled into the pillow.

It only takes him a few more thrusts to follow you. Reaching his peak as he releases the warm substance deep into you with a strangled moan. You can feel the last of his cum spurting against your walls, filling you up in that way you’ve come to love so much.

He places kiss after kiss along your sweaty skin. The sound of heavy breathing as you slowly regain your senses filling the quiet room. “I love you,” he says softly as he kisses your cheek. You use the little strength you have left to turn your head slightly to meet his lips in a tender kiss. “I love you too.” you chuckle softly at your awkward position.

After a few seconds he pulls out and you move to lay on your back. He quickly presses his body back against your own and you wrap your arms around him, keeping him close. “You okay?” he asks, taking in your complete fucked expression.

“Don’t think I can move— but I’m great.” he chuckles in return to your words, brushing your sweaty hair out of your face gently. Kissing you again. “Good thing you won’t have to move then,”

Sitting back, he almost whines at the sight of his cum dripping out of you. Taking you by surprise, he pushes two fingers into you, pushing it right back in as you let out a whimper. It’s all too sensitive.

“Stop, It’s all in there,” you tiredly swat his arm, unable to hide the small smile tugging at your lips. He chuckles, pulling them out and pressing a kiss on the back of your leg, “Not all of it,” he informs with a cheeky smile.

“Baby, put your legs up.” He asks, already pushing them up gently by the back of your thighs. Confused by his actions, but you’re too tired to even stop him.

“What?” you ask tiredly, lifting your head from the pillow to shoot him a puzzled look, “Baby, I’m not ready for a second round-” 

“It’s to keep it in,” he says seriously.

Oh. You watch him, focused on keeping your legs in the air with his hands and you have to hold back the laugh. Well this is new. Watching his concentrated pout, you find him oddly adorable considering what he's doing, and what he just did to you. The way he just fucked so hard you know you’ll be feeling it for next week.

“Baby,” you chuckle, lazily reaching for his arms, ”I don’t think it makes a difference.”

“Trust me, I read this helps,” he fetches some pillows. “The more that stays in the better the chance. So lift your butt,” he says tapping the side of it, making you let out a noise of complaint at having to move your body, watching as he props the pillows beneath you.

“There. Stay like this for a little, yeah?” he reaches down to kiss you and you can’t prevent the playful smile and roll of your eyes that follow, “okay…but come here,” you whine, reaching out for his hands to pull him back down beside you. “Cuddle me,” you boss— though he was already planning to.

“So demanding,” he chuckles, kissing the corner of your lips that tug into a satisfied smile at his warm body, finally holding you close again. You can’t get enough.

“So how long do I have to stay like this?” you question after a while, raising a brow at him as you push back his sweaty strands of hair, taking in his chiseled features. Fuck, he’s so goddamn handsome.

“An hour.” He says nonchalantly.

“An hour?” you parrot, head lifting off the pillow to glare at him, “Jungkook that’s ridiculous, I’m not doing this for an hour” you say incredulously. “I feel like I’m doing yoga— and yoga sucks”

He lets out a breathy laugh, sitting up, “I’m just messing with you.” He comes to settle between your legs, slowly putting them down and you sigh in relief as he parts them to glance between them. It seems to have worked cause not much more has slipped out.

“What are you doing?” you question, cheeks heating up at the way he’s shamelessly looking there, tongue running over his bottom lip. It’s stupid to feel embarrassed really, like he hasn’t seen it a thousand times before— after what he just did to you.

He smirks, giving you that goofy look of his as he grips your thighs, slowly coaxing you to put them back down, “If you weren’t so exhausted I’d fuck you again,”

God, he really can be insatiable sometimes.

“Stop,” you throw your pillow at him playfully as he climbs over you, kissing between giggles, “I don’t think I’ll survive right now if I cum like that again.”

“Mhm, I know you can take more than that,” He mumbles, rubbing his nose against yours.

You roll your eyes playfully. He’s not wrong. “I’m gonna go shower,” you kiss his cheek before sitting up. Cringing at the feeling of cum as it slides slightly down the inside of your thigh. Well, at least you tried.

“I’ll join you-”

“No you won’t.” you exclaim, pushing him back down onto the bed when he sits up a little too eagerly.

“Come on, why not?” he pouts, sounding too cute to be the same man that just rearranged your guts. But you ignore him, scooting off the bed. Feeling a little weak in your knees as you go over to your bathroom. You know him too well. As much as you’d love to, you’re not sure you can handle another round right now.

“I’ll wash your hair for you, give you a nice head massage,” he calls out, and even though your back is turned to him, you just know the little smug smile he’s sporting.

That does sound very tempting right now. Maybe a little too tempting. 

You simply give him a little coy smile, calling him over with your index finger and narrowed eyes. Turning on the shower as you hear him follow behind until his strong arms are wrapping around your waist. Kissing the side of your neck.

“Knew you couldn’t say no to that.”

You try to regain hope, staying positive, but it’s still a challenge when weeks go by and nothing seems to change in your favor.

You walk out of the bathroom and into your bedroom where Jungkook is tiredly getting ready for work.

“Are you alright?” he asks with a slight yawn, doing up the buttons of his shirt, noticing the sudden shift in your mood.

“Just got my period.” You answer flatly as you plop down on the mattress, keeping your gaze downcast as you fiddle with your hands. 

Jungkook frowns slightly at your words, holding back the little sigh before going over to sit beside you, instantly enveloping you in a tight hug. It makes sense now.

“I love you.” He whispers, pressing a kiss to your temple as you nuzzle into him tiredly.

You had agreed that you would stop taking frequent pregnancy tests since constantly seeing the negative results left you feeling disheartened and demotivated. Only resulted in feelings of hurt and from time to time, tears and pointless fights. But you couldn’t stop your period from disappointing you every time it came along to remind you that you were very much still not pregnant.

“We’ll try again,” he reminds, his tone gentle — just like the hand he runs along arm. “Just have to be patient.”

You let out a tiny bitter laugh, unable to look up at him. It’s now been over a year since you started trying. A year. Being patient is only getting harder as the days go on. So you simply answer with a nod, not feeling up to continue with the conversation.

We’ll try again. You’re really starting to get tired of hearing that. Hell, he must be tired of saying it.

“Hey,” he says when he feels the way your body stiffens, tilting his head to look at you. “It’s alright, mhm?”

You bite your quivering lip, nodding silently once again. It should be alright, yet it doesn’t feel that way. You feel tears desperately fighting to fall, but there doesn’t seem to be any left. It’s like that dreaded feeling of emptiness is consuming you once again, taking over you completely and you can’t even bring yourself to cry anymore.

He pulls you further into his chest, breaking down the wall he knows you’re already building up between you. “It’s alright, baby. It’s okay.”

He knows you’re not okay. He also knows that with your own feelings of sadness and disappointment at yet another negative result, also comes the feeling that you’ve failed him, again — failed to give him something he too strongly longs for. Something you just can’t seem to give him no matter how much you try. And you should be able to. 

He wishes you’d understand that it hurts him way more to see you this way. That it isn’t your fault.

But It pains your heart, makes you feel so dejected. You can’t help but feel that way even when you know you shouldn’t. 

You remain silent. He doesn't push it though. Just holds you tightly— hoping it’s enough to keep you together so that you don’t crumble into a mess of tears again. 

“Want me to get you anything before I go?” He speaks after a minute, scanning your tired features that hold so much hurt it causes his heart to ache. 

He wishes he didn’t have to go right now — that he didn’t have to leave you by yourself when you're feeling this way. Despite your apparent bitterness and coldness you unconsciously use to cover up the hurt, he knows you need comfort. He wants to stay here with you.

“I’m okay. Just going to sleep some more.” You whisper against his chest.

“Okay. Call me if you need anything, yeah?”

Nodding, he finally untangles his arms from around you after another minute, giving you a goodbye kiss before you get under the covers once again and fall back to sleep, which happens surprisingly quickly. Maybe your brain is too exhausted to even dwell on it anymore.

When you wake up a while later. There’s a hot water bottle, your usual pain meds and your favorite chocolate bar left for you on the bedside table. 

Your heart instantly melt at the not so uncommon gesture.

You love him so much.

With the coming months only come more negative tests and disappointment. Even more small arguments here and there with Jungkook — that you’re mostly to blame for since you’re so fucking touchy over everything, you can’t help it.

You try to not let it consume you. You try not to make it your main focus — like the specialist so kindly advised. But you can’t deny that something as simple as walking past the baby aisle at a store makes your heart ache in your chest. You want to walk down it, hand in hand with Jungkook as you pick out things for your baby. But maybe you never will.

It’s small things like that in your daily life that held no significance or you never payed attention to, that now have the power to shift your mood and trap you within the walls of your overthinking mind.  

It doesn’t help that Jungkook has been doing longer hours at work. So busy that when he finally gets home to you at night he’s so exhausted that he goes straight to sleep. Or on some occasions, he fights it for a little longer and tiredly listens to you go on about this and that until you realize you’re talking to yourself. You don’t blame him for it, but sometimes you just feel so...alone.

It feel lonely, like no one understands you. Like you have no one talk to — because, well...you don’t.

You know you have Jungkook, but you don’t want to drive him crazy with your worries and heartache that he can’t fix. Especially not these days when his own job demands so much of his energy.

And so it occurs to to you over dinner, maybe a break is necessary.

“Maybe we should stop trying,” you announce quietly, aimlessly picking at your food. You don’t even have an appetite lately.

Jungkook’s brows shoot up as he narrows his eyes slightly before speaking. “What?”

“I don’t know...maybe we should stop,” you reiterate, finally lifting your gaze from the food to meet his puzzled expression.

“You mean the whole baby thing?”

“Yes.” You answer, not sounding as sure of yourself as you wish.

He seems unsure of what to say. “Have you...changed your mind? You don’t want this anymore?” He asks gently, studying your features as he puts down his spoon.

You quickly shake your head, “no, of course I still want it,” you assure him. “But I don’t think that matters because it’s not working for us anyway...so I just think we should stop.” You put your own utensils down as well, sinking into your seat and wrapping your arms around yourself. “Maybe it’s not meant to be for us.”

Jungkook doesn’t say anything for a moment, just lets out a soft exhale. You think he’s probably too tired to be having this conversation right now.

“Don’t say that. Of course it is.”

“I’m just tired kook,” you begin, your voice small. He leans forward, looking at you with those soft doe eyes that never fail to warm your heart.

He sighs, reaching out to take your hands in his, “So…are you saying you want to stop having sex?” he quirks a brow jokingly.

“No,” you shake your head with the tiniest chuckle. “But maybe I should go back on the pill. At least then I’ll know for sure I’m not pregnant and I can finally have a glass of wine,” you say lightly, but you notice Jungkook's expression looks...slightly dejected, his tiny smile not reaching his eyes. 

You would also be able to stop clinging on to that tiny bit of hope that keeps getting crushed again and again. But you don’t mention that part.

“Oh,” he nods slowly, sitting back in his seat. “So you want to stop trying for good?”

“Not for good. Just like, a break maybe.” You explain.

“If that’s what you want.” He answers after a moment. And for some reason, the silence that lingers after isn’t the usual comfortable silence you always experience around one another. It’s different, the air feels just a little denser as it carries the weight of your unspoken thoughts. 

You resume eating in silence. Washing up the plates once you’re done and you both head to bed, not sharing more than a couple of words and a quick goodnight kiss before turning off the lights .

The topic isn’t brought up again until a few days later, where you end up deciding to keep trying anyway. Even though you’re emotionally drained, you won’t give up.

Thursday mornings usually mean you have the opportunity to have a little lie in, since you go in for work a little later than usual. But not this morning, because today you’ve made breakfast plans with one of your closest friends.

Jungkook was the one who insisted you go out, despite him finally having a day off after the past prolonged days at work. He suggested you should get out of the house, spend some time with your friend to catch up and take your mind off all the current stress you were going through for a little while. It surely wouldn’t do you any harm, and with the way things have been between you these past weeks, maybe talking to a friend would serve as a nice distraction and a chance to get some things off your chest.

It’s not often you get to see your friends anymore. Everyone is busy with their own lives now, which means finding time to meet and catch up is challenging for all of you. And with most of your friends now being parents and having families of their own, it’s only become harder.

Everyone except for Nari, and well, you.

You make your way down the busy street towards the small café and wait inside, but you don’t have to wait long before you hear that familiar bubbly voice calling out for you, making you look up from your phone, instantly spotting her.

“Nari!” you beam as you stand to greet her with a bright smile and a big hug. You haven’t seen her since her wedding and that happened around three months ago now. It’s been too long.

“I think I’m going to cry. I missed you so much!” She hugs you back tightly, making you giggle. You honestly feel like you could cry too.

The next hour is spent catching up on everything over food and drinks. She tells you all about her honeymoon and you can’t help but smile and feel giddy at your friends' joy. It’s radiating out of her and so contagious. But soon after, you find yourself wondering if you should bring it up. Finally tell a friend about what you’ve been struggling with for all this time. Though, you’re having such a nice time you don't want to ruin it by bringing up your problems. But at this point, you’re aching to get it off your chest.

You take a sip of your smoothie, finally mustering up the courage but that’s when you notice the way Nari has gone quiet, nervously messing with her hands, her gaze wavering from the table to you.

Putting your drink down, you quirk a brow, “what?” You ask, glancing behind you. Oh god, is that annoying waiter here again? 

But she shakes her head, biting back a smile as she brings her hands to her face, letting out a nervous laugh behind them. So It’s not the waiter. Confused at her sudden strange behavior, you shoot her a slightly puzzled look, “what?” You reiterate with a gentle laugh.

She finally places her hands out on the table, fixing her eyes on yours. She takes a deep breath before speaking, a wide smile forming on her lips.

“I’m pregnant!” she blurts out.

Oh.

It takes you a second to react. “Oh my god! What?” You stand, the chair screeching across the floor as you make your way to her immediately, “oh my god Nari, n-no way! Congratulations!” You beam.

Nari is pregnant?

You can’t deny the little blow you felt in your heart the second the words left her mouth. You honestly weren’t expecting it. But it quickly turns into excitement and happiness for your friends.

“12 weeks today.” She smiles fondly, her eyes a little watery, “I found out around two weeks ago but I wanted to tell you in person.”

You hug her again, making a sound of excitement that definitely has the other few people in the café staring at you both. You pull away before speaking, “wait, Joon knows already right?”

She nods, “I surprised him last week. He was over the moon,” she recalls with a smile, “he already texts me baby names every day since.” She chuckles. She looks so happy you can’t help but smile from ear to ear despite the dull ache in your chest. 

“Nari, I can't believe it! I’m so happy for you guys!” You smile, trying to push away the small voice in your head that is telling you how unfair this is. It isn’t. They deserve this. 

You are genuinely happy. But you can’t say it doesn’t also hurt a little. 

You wonder if you’ll ever get to experience the excitement of telling your friends and family news like that. You long for the day you get to tell Jungkook and watch his face light up when he learns he’s finally going to be a father. Because he wants it so badly. The same way you do. You want your own little family. Is it too much to ask?

“But don’t tell Jungkook yet! Joon wants to tell the guys himself!” she warns.

You smile with a nod. 

You wonder how Jungkook will feel about this. Will his heart deflate the same way yours did? Will it feel like a kick in the face to him too? Probably not. He’s not a horrible person like you are. Because, you are a horrible person for having this odd feeling lingering within you when all you should feel is happiness, right?

There goes another friend. Another friend you’ll lose to everything that is baby bottles and baby products you’ll have no idea about. Another friend who’ll be too busy with her new baby to hang out with you. But that’s not even what’s bothering you. You’re used to that from all your other friends.

It’s okay though. You’re happy for her.

It hasn’t even been ten minutes since you walked into your work building, but you’re already dreading every upcoming hour you’ll have to sit behind this damn desk when all your body pleads for is to be back at home, wrapped up in the covers within the comfort of your bed, where you can cry and finally get rid of the ridiculous, suffocating urge that has made itself present since breakfast with your friend. 

But instead, you try hard to focus all your attention on filing documents that need to be done and sent out by the end of the week. You groan internally when you notice how much work you’ve been neglecting this week. Being far too wrapped up in your head and dealing with your personal struggles that were making it hard to concentrate, your work performance has visibly began slacking. At this point, you’re honestly just surprised your boss hasn’t called you into her office yet.

Once you miraculously manage to get a good chunk of work done, you force yourself to take a small pause. You were hoping it would be empty but you soon realize it’s not by the loud laughter and chattering filling the space as you enter the small break room. Although, you relax slightly when you spot your two closest colleagues.

You greet them with a meek smile as you grab a drink of water from the water dispenser before joining them at the table. Unconsciously letting out a deep sigh.

“Rough day, huh?” Jeewon remarks as she takes a sip of her coffee, eyeing your exhausted state before pulling out the chair beside her for you.

Is it really that obvious? Maybe you do look as horrible as you feel.

“Just have so much to get done today,” You explain.

“I can’t believe Mina left us,” Nayeon butts in, scrolling through her phone with a pout. 

“I swear everyone in this building is taking maternity leave right now.” Jeewon sighs.

Okay, at least you’re not imagining things. It is true. Everyone is getting pregnant these days. You remain silent, not adding to the conversation save for a subtle nod. Deciding to focus on the view outside the large window instead.

“Are you and Jungkook going to be next?” Jeewon asks, a playful glint in her eyes as she gives you a little shove, wagging her eyebrows making the other shoot you a teasing smile. 

Something twists inside of you— something uncomfortable that instantly settles in the pit of your stomach. Jesus, you really wish they’d stop with that.

“I don’t know, maybe someday.” You reply nonchalantly, giving her a small forced smile, feeling your heart clench in a similar way it did just hours ago in that café, and hoping it isn’t apparent in your features. 

As much as you’d like to deny it— It hurts. Nobody knows how much you’ve struggled with this for the past year. No one knows you have in fact been trying to no avail. Nobody knows how many tears you’ve already shed due to this. Nobody will ever know.

“Oh come on, you should have one! You’ve been settled down for ages now, right?” she presses, a little too enthusiastically for your liking.

“So you’re thinking about it!” Nayeon somehow assumes from your vague answer, jumping in, her eyes wide with interest as leans forward on her forearms

You feel your hands tightening around the cup in your hand, twirling it nervously between your fingers in an attempt to calm yourself. 

You should just have one. Sure. Cause it’s that fucking simple, isn’t it.

You bite your lip. Already done with this conversation. “Maybe someday,” you repeat, looking away from the two girls. A mixture of anger and hurt now bubbling within you. Maybe any other day you would have been able to laugh it off, or at least it wouldn’t have crushed your heart. But not today. Today it fucking hurts.

“Does Jungkook not want one yet?” she quirks a brow as they both watch you for an answer.

Honestly, why the fuck they felt like they had the right to ask you such questions was beyond you. But you aren’t willing to just sit here and listen to it much longer. 

Sure, you’ve known these girls for years from working here, you could call them friends by now. You’re sure they don’t mean any harm by it. It’s not meant to be malicious in any way— it’s not like they know what you’re going through. But after your emotionally charged morning you’re not sure you can handle this conversation going on any longer.

There’s so much you want to say. But you bite your tongue instead, holding it in. You push out your chair, getting up.

“I don’t know. Anyway, gotta get back to work,” you say coldly, leaving them both to glance at each other with a puzzled look as you walk out, your eyes stinging with unshed tears.

It’s already dark outside by the time you get back home. Closing the door to your apartment behind you, you immediately kick off your uncomfortable work heels, letting your bag fall off your shoulder carelessly. God, it's been a long day.

As you make your way over to the kitchen to grab a drink you hear the sound of the shower running and spot Jungkook's gym bag thrown on the floor beside the sofa. Great. You haven’t checked his texts since before you left work, but you had secretly been hoping he was still out and had dragged out his workout a little longer. Simply so you could skip dinner and leave to cry in the comfort of your room until you fall asleep without having him questioning or worrying about it. But that’s no longer an option.

Letting out a tired sigh, you busy yourself by washing some dishes that have been left in the sink, with no intent on reproaching your husband about it today. Just moments later, Jungkook enters the room and you briefly turn your head to him, his eyes lighting up instantly at the sight of you.

“I didn't hear you get back,” he tells you, making his way over to you with a soft smile before he wraps his arms around your waist, body pressed against your back as he places a chaste kiss right on your cheek. “I missed you.”

You don’t reply, just tilt your head back to meet his puckered lips for a quick peck.

“How was your day?” He asks as he props his chin on your shoulder. His hair still wet from the shower softly tickling the side of your face. And he smells so good.

But you’re not in the mood to tell him about your day today. Particularly because it was terrible, but you don’t feel you have a valid enough reason to back up your claim. All you know is, you’re not in the mood for anything.

“It was okay.” You lie, hoping he doesn’t notice the way your body tenses at the simple question. He hums with a nod in return, placing another chaste kiss on the side of your face.

“Sorry,” he apologizes sheepishly once he realizes what you’re doing. “I’ll finish doing these, you go get changed.” His hands fall from around you as you turn to face him, drying your hands on the kitchen towel. 

“Okay. I'm gonna take a quick shower,” you say with a tiny forced smile that takes way more effort than it should before heading down the hallway to your room.

A little while later, you’re sat comfortably on the sofa. Jungkook's arm around you as he browses through the movie section. He’s going on about some movie your friend Yoongi recommended, complaining because he can’t seem to find it. But you’re not paying much attention. His words sound distant and you’re far too lost in your own thoughts to listen. 

You can’t stop thinking about it...about everything. Surely you’re being dramatic, you know you are. But you feel the ugly bitterness you had managed to somewhat simmer down slowly consuming you again the more you think about it. 

Why do you even feel like this? Why do you feel like no one in your life gets the way you feel? Why does it hurt so much? You need to get over yourself. 

You’ve now settled on a movie, but all you want to do is sob out of frustration. It’s so unfair—it hurts. What’s playing on the tv does little to distract you from the way you’re feeling, though you try hard to focus on anything that isn’t your own spiraling mind. But you fail.

It’s not long into the movie you feel Jungkook’s soft lips leaving delicate, feathery kisses along your exposed shoulder, slowly travelling up to your neck, where they become slightly stronger. His warm hand moves to your thigh, massaging the flesh ever so tenderly. It pulls you right out of your incessant thoughts, but for some reason, it only sparks a flame of irritation. You tense under his actions, causing him to pull away and look at your face.

“Not in the mood, Jungkook.” You tug the blanket over your shoulder brashly before even giving him a chance to speak.

He keeps his hand placed carefully over your thigh as he studies your expression in the dim lighting, taken aback and slightly confused by the sudden harshness of your tone. 

“Oh, that’s fine, baby,” he starts slowly. “Is something wrong?” He asks, just now realizing how silent you've been since you sat down for the movie, feeling stupid for not noticing something’s clearly wrong sooner. He just assumed you were tired. Although now he has a feeling there’s most likely something more to it.

“Why does something have to be wrong? I’m just tired.” You answer bitterly, keeping your eyes trained on the movie playing before you, fists involuntarily curling against the soft material of the blanket as you feel inexplicable aggravation growing. 

Sitting up a little straighter, he speaks again. ”No, I mean- you seem...upset. That’s why I’m asking.”

You pry his hand off your thigh, slipping out of his warmth as the blanket drops onto him when you get up.

“Where are you going?” He’s confused. Expression faltering completely as his eyes follow your every move.

“To bed, I’m tired.” You answer coldly, not bothering to even cast him a glace before you grab your phone and walk out of the room.

Jungkook runs a hand through his hair, dropping both hands to his lap as he sighs. Confusion washing over him as he tries to place what he did to upset you like this.

It’s just a few minutes later when Jungkook decides to follow after you, heading straight for the bedroom.

“You okay?” He asks softly, standing at the open doorway before taking a couple hesitant steps into the room. His eyes focusing instantly on you, sat silently in the bed with your hands brushing over your face.

“I’m fine,” your answer bluntly, avoiding his questioning gaze as you proceed to get beneath the covers. 

“Are you sure about that?” He presses, raising a brow in question, his expression showing concern. He doesn’t miss the way you almost roll your eyes at him as you attempt to get comfortable, but not in that playful way you would usually, it’s more like the pissed off kind of way—the one that let’s him know something is definitely wrong.

“Yes, I am sure. I already told you, I’m tired.” Your words come out a little too bitterly to be true, and you know your tone definitely isn’t helping your case, but you can’t help it. You just want to be left alone.

“Okay...” He rubs his forehead feebly before taking a seat on his side of the bed, body now turned to you, still wracking his brain for answers. “Are you perhaps...mad at me?”

You feel yourself growing more agitated with each word that leaves his mouth and you simply wish he would stop talking. All you want is to be by yourself. You don’t want to talk. You just want to be alone, desperately. 

But when you don’t give him an answer, he speaks up again.

“Baby, I’m just trying to talk to you-”

“No I’m not fucking mad at you okay!” You snap, loud and harsh as you sit upright in bed, fixing him with a stare. “Just leave me alone, please.”

“Well it really fucking feels like it,” he counters, his tone not as gentle as it was just seconds ago. Because he doesn't get it. Where is all of this even coming from? Why can't you just tell him what's wrong? You’ve always been good at communicating everything with each other. When there’s an issue, you solve it. Why are you acting like this?

“What? Because I’m not in the mood to have sex with you?” You scoff, watching the way his expression instantly hardens. 

“Woah, what are you talking about?” He exasperates, brows knitting together as he twists his body entirely to glare at you. “I just want to know what's wrong, because clearly something is bothering you. What the hell, Y/n.”

“I think I’ve made it clear that I'm just tired so quit asking me.” 

He lets out a tiny sarcastic scoff in return. “Then why are you being like this with me?” 

He’s starting to get annoyed, still baffled by your previous comment. He knows the past few weeks have been a tough time for you both, but everything seemed to be okay. Or so he thought.

“Why do you keep pushing me away? Why won’t you talk to me?” He stands, letting his hands fall to his sides.

“Why can’t you just respect that I don’t want to talk?” You shriek back, eyes burning into his. The air is growing tense and you feel like it's suddenly getting harder to breathe. How did this end in a fucking argument? it was never your intention.

“I just wanted to know what’s wrong so I can maybe help you! Sorry for fucking caring about my wife!” He spits, words now laced with vigorous anger that you’ve managed to cause, yet there’s an obvious layer of hurt to his expression and tone that seem to overpower it.

Letting out a scoff, you turn your face away from him to lay on your side. “Well you can’t fucking help me, so save it.”

The room falls silent for what feels like an eternity. Nothing but the faint sound of the few cars speeding by from the streets below. You feel a sudden lump in your throat and your eyes are now burning with the urge to spill as you stare at the wall, your hands gripping the covers tightly to your chest. The silence lingers until you hear the faint ruffle of the bed sheets as Jungkook sits back down on the bed, running his palms over his face. But just seconds after, he's on his feet again.

“You know what- fine. I’m going for a drive.” He sounds more defeated than furious, his voice low and firm. He won’t push it any further.

Your heart drops to your stomach when you hear him open the dresser to pull out a plain hoodie and grab the car keys. You turn around slowly to look at him, and it takes a painful amount of effort to get your voice out. It’s almost an inaudible choke when you do. 

“Jungkook…” you try to reason as you watch him collect his phone from the nightstand and shove it into his pocket. But if he hears you, he doesn’t respond.

Where is he even going to? It’s too late. You don’t want him to actually leave. This is all so stupid. It’s all your fault.

You know you should apologize, stop him before it spirals further, but with all your raging emotions still so present, you just can’t bring yourself to — internally cursing yourself for being so goddamn stubborn. 

Fuck, you’re such a mess.

Just a moment later you hear the front door shut. Your anger now boiled down to nothing but guilt that floods your chest. The tears you’d been holding back all day finally break free violently onto your pillow and you want to shatter into pieces.

I hope you enjoyed it! thanks for reading 🤍