#pleasedonthurtme

[bubbleddisasters]

Leona and Garfield are one in the same.

I will not be taking objections at this time.

[bakem07]

This man's best friend was watching the 💩out of me‼️😭🤣🤣🤣 🐕👀 #dogwatcher #thewatcher #manbestfriend #iseeyou #iseeyoutoo #lol #antirobbery #dogalert #shook #nothingpersonal #nottoday #pleasedonthurtme #youbigashell #fido #lassie #lmao #bearalert #alldogsgotoheaven #scaryass #cantcatchabreak #dog #dogsofinstagram #doglover #guarddog #guarddogsonduty #doggoviral #dogstagram #dogonduty https://www.instagram.com/p/CnViDvjOyug/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[naive-petals]

Screw it. at least in fate Verse Violet is now 130cm.

[ask-big-anon]

that's good,,

What color did you think you were typing in?

I just thought it was a nice colours based on what I could see! I didn't know it was just actually green!

[dave-the-tech-guy]

...........,.,, ..,,.canyoupleasecuthatout

[t0rturedangel]

╭ . . . a guide to becoming noticeable ੭

• ➛ LOVE INTERESTS ╰ notes :: creek is still canon in this.

DOVAHKIIN / NEW KID - ✮ • ━ " . . . "

STANLY MARSH - ✮ • ━ " I- listen I know I used to be an asshole but- "

KYLE BROFLOVSKI - ✮ • ━ " I never hated you or thought you were weird "

KENNETH MCCORMICK - ✮ • ━ " God- you can definitely punch the shit outta me babe "

LEOPOLD 'BUTTERS' STOTCH - ✮ • ━ " . . . Why'd they suddenly change attitudes to you? "

TWEEK TWEAK - ✮ • ━ " D-do you want some c-coffee? ACK- "

CRAIG TUCKER - ✮ • ━ " I guess, you're chill "

CLYDE DONOVAN - ✮ • ━ " Heyyyy !! pleasedonthurtme I think you're really cool ! "

SCOTT MALKINSON - ✮ • ━ " You won't leave us will you? "

WENDY TESTABURGER - ✮ • ━ " Awh girl! I'll totally help you ! "

TOLKIEN BLACK - ✮ • ━ " It's nice to be around someone who isn't loud and arrogant for once "

here's the masterlist

[eddywoww]

Eddie Munson is the defacto leader of a coed theater fraternity at his Uni. They’re a close knit bunch who have each others back at all times, even if the rest of their school might see them as a joke.

The only problem is that their meetings are historically usurped by the Alpha Phi frat house who happen to be placed right next to the classroom that they are forced to squeeze their meetings into. Do they get a frat house? No, of course not. It doesn’t help that Eddie has actual beef with the frats vice president, some floppy haired idiot he refuses to learn the name of (Steve Harrington) because he’s stolen Eddie’s parking space like five times since the semester began and he keeps stopping by their class, seemingly looking for Eddie (who definitely doesn’t dip out to hide every time, he’s not about to fight some sports scholarship kid)

It doesn’t help that the animosity between the two groups isn’t new. It doesn’t help that they’ve been fucking with each other years before Eddie even arrived at the Uni. It’s kind of a time honored tradition to try and get under each others skin.

So when Benny the Octopus goes missing one day, naturally, Eddie freaks the fuck out. That’s their octopus made of welded together scrap metal, thank you very much and he’s been in the theater for over a decade. They protect Benny, they love Benny. How did the frat even get their hands on him? And if you, like Robin, are bothering to ask “Why would you assume it was them, Eddie?” Then you can actually just shut the fuck up because it was definitely 100% them.

This entire ordeal leads to Eddie taking one for the team, obviously. Which further leads to Eddie sacrificing himself in the name of Benny to climb the short distance up the back of Alpha Sigmas stupid little frat house and into their second floor bathroom because it’s the only point of entry that Eddie can truly find that won’t get him automatically tackled to the ground. Could he go to a higher up and solve this problem without breaking and entering? Maybe. But that’s boring.

So he goes on his espionage recovery mission, realizing too late that maybe he isn’t the sneakiest person imaginable as he grapples with vines and barely manages to get solid footing on the ledged roof below him. And then he’s in the bathroom, pulling himself through the window and- right. It doesn’t matter that it’s 2 am. This is a frat house, Eddie. These are frat guys, why would they be asleep?

It’s with a big whopping holy fuck oh no what have I done, that Eddie falls through the window and onto the floor of a steamy, recently used bathroom. Because someone had been showering. Because said someone is standing there with a towel held firmly over his crotch, a deer in headlights expression marking his face as brunette hair drips onto his chest.

And Eddie has no clue what to do because being faced with a naked, let alone wet Steve Harrington is doing things to his brain (and his dick) that he can’t really handle.

And then Steve opens his mouth to blurt out “Whyareyouinmybathroom pleasedonthurtme!” And okay, that’s maybe a little dramatic. Which Eddie tells him, before realizing that he is in fact wearing a ski mask. So like, fair. But then it clicks on Steve’s face and he relaxes fast into a bitchy frown. “You’re that fucking theater kid, aren’t you?”

Which, okay. Eddie wasn’t aware Steve even knew him.

He makes his way off the floor and “I’d offer to shake your hand but uh-“ Steve turns bright red and winds the towel around his waist as quickly as possible. Right. Down to business. “I want Benny back.” Which, as it turns out, Steve feigns like he has no clue who Benny even is. Rude. “Big, metal, kind of looks like shit.”

Steve could not get any redder as Eddie tries to explain himself in a roundabout way, not at all going into a tangent about his distaste for the frat while Steve drips onto the floor. And then-

“I have no clue what you’re talking about and it sounds like you have weird one sided beef because I have never intentionally done anything to upset you.”

And that’s just- that is not true. That’s not true. At all.

“You steal my parking space!”

“They’re not assigned!”

“It’s a respect thing and you keep coming to my meetings, looking for me by name! Which is weird by the way!”

“I wanted your number!”

As soon as Steve blurts it out, he clams right up and Eddie just- he just- “You wanted my number?” Because that’s inconceivable. That doesn’t make sense. “Why didn’t you just ask for it?”

“Because you hide every time I try to find you!” Steve blurted out again, eyes squeezed shut like he was genuinely embarrassed and right. He was naked and maybe had a crush on Eddie? Which was- yeah, Eddie wanted to touch him now. But he wanted to be cautious too. So he made his way closer slowly, trying to give Steve an out. He really was so pretty close up, a fact that Eddie had been trying desperately to deny for so long now.

Eddie reached up and pulled his stupid mask off, staring at Steve as his eyes opened back up, tentative and stressed.

“You could ask me for it now,” Eddie said with a small grin, lips upturned as Steve chewed on his bottom lip. “I might say yes.”

Steve rolled his eyes, reaching up to smack Eddie across the back of his head. Eddie caught his hand and pulled him into an unmasked kiss.

[tigersharko]

i had nothingtod o with this correspondence.

this is. mccarthyism.

.....wwhatabout telegram?

Myles. I just finished up with you. I am fresh out of fucks. You know better.

//Deuces\\

[my-poetry-archive]

I’ve tried explaining

why you should care about others

And I’ve tried educating

you about things I care about

and how they impact me

and you.

But you’re a shut door

locked tight

with no key in sight.

I can’t convince you

that I’m a person

and you should care about people.

At this point all I can do

is beg

and plead

on my hands and knees

with all my Heart

and all that’s left

To please

Don’t hurt me!

Please, please, please

Don’t hurt me

Don’t hurt me

Don’t hurt me

pleasedonthurtme pleasepleasepleaseplease

Don’t hurt me.

10/17/24

[the-cool-chicken]

KICKIN. WHY ARE THE ANONS TELLING ME THAT YOU'RE TRYING TO ESCAPE?!

-@acat-foryournap

“No I’m not???

Pleasedonthurtme.”

[naive-petals]

@theothervonkarmagirl

Caeldori wanted to call out Ninas bluff, she believed the other wouldn’t leave them to die and she would run out of food for the traitors eventually. If nothing else it may even scare Clara a good amount, but…

“I’m… sorry, for asking to smack your mom.” She didn’t want Nina angry at her, she was one of her closest friends! She’d do her best for the outlaws sake.

"Not the answer I was looking for Clare-Bear." If Nina had any more rope, she'd make another few loops around the tree to keep both girls pinned to the trunk. "My mother once told me about something called the 'get-along shirt', what we have here is the 'get along rope', and it is not coming off until you two talk this out and make amends."

"Dori, threatening to slap Auntie Ria wasn't cool. She didn't do anything wrong, and she did not spread rumors about me or my Mother."

"Clare-Bear, calling for Dori's arrest over this was going too far, she made threats, but she never acted on them. Auntie Ria didn't get hurt. So there's no crime to punish. Those wanted posters are coming down. Clear?"

"I haven't got all evening." She'd only brought so many buckets of food to feed the pegasi and she hoped those buckets of oats and tasty carrots would last.

[thehyperrequiem]

Hey guys remember Shroomie Shenanigans from Cookie Run Kingdom?

Well, I have something funny I whipped up in my art kitchen...And don't worry, I am using the Barbie Doll Anatomy Trope, pleasedonthurtme.

🍄

Behold, Buff Herbert! 💪

(Read the image's ALT for a secret message)

And yes, this is a joke.

[naive-petals]

So Rose now that Floras around are you ready to start courting her?

“Don’t say that!” Mortified Rose did her best to ignore her rapidly blushing cheeks as she shook her head back and forth in denial. “I am not courting Flora!”

[opheliajupiter99]

...Ok why not. At this point I don't even care.

Why did the skeleton want a friend?

Because he was feeling bonely.

Pleasedonthurtme

*The horror produced a shrieking, hyena-like laugh, that rattled out and echoed outwards heartily, it's tendrils wriggling happily*

[mixed-up-multiverse]

@spookyowlman-b sent: 🍰

Holiday Cakes | Accepting until January!

The tiny cookie looked up at the ghostly owl towering over her, a look of pure, unaltered fear on her face. Ghosts are scary! She'd better give him his cake before he decides to gobble her up like the ghosts in the stories told during the spookier seasons...!

She holds the cake above her head (again, this spectral strigiforme was towering over her) so the owl can take it, shaking like a leaf as she hopes he'll like it. It's a miracle that her trembling and sweating arms are not making the cake fall over or slip out of her grasp.

"Uhh... H-Here's your cake, sir...! I-I sure hope you uhhh... e-enjoy it! pleasedonthurtme--"

[noahhasbeensummoned]

If anyone other than Noah’s reading this.. you should torture the other one, too!

He’s the reason he stayed so long, after all!

If it’s Noah reading this.

Pleasedonthurtme.

The other one?

As in SLEEPY?

YALL WANT ME TO TORTURE SLEEPY ASWELL??? CAUSE I WILL