#please for the love of all that is holy can we NOT get additional flooding or repeat flooding

[xenglitch]

[btsqualityy]

Scripted: Part 18

Namjoon x Reader; Jimin x Reader

Genre: Angst, fluff, President!Namjoon, Head of Security!Jimin

Warnings: (Reluctant) open relationship, mentions of cheating, unprotected sex, oral sex

One Month Later

“You’re gonna overexert yourself, you absolute idiot,” you chastised, making Namjoon chuckle as he turned around and slowly walked back over to his desk. Over the past month that had passed since the shooting, Namjoon had had another surgery on his chest to try and repair some of the damage that he sustained, and it turned out to be pretty successful. It lengthened his recovery time considerably, but you were just happy that he was conscious and alert again. 

Within the past few days, Namjoon had decided that he finally felt well enough to go back down to the West Wing of the Blue House and start working again, but not without you going along with him most of the time to keep an watchful eye on him and his condition. 

“I keep you telling you, I’m fine baby,” he assured you, plopping back down in his large desk chair and you couldn’t ignore the slightly labored breathing that filled the room. 

“You know what the therapist said, no pet names,” you reminded him as you leaned against his desk, making him groan dramatically. 

“I should’ve never told you that she said that to me,” he grumbled, making you smile lightly. Namjoon had been going to therapy on his own in order to work on his issues and show you that he was serious about fighting for you. You were happy that he was doing something to better himself, but you still weren’t sure about you two really getting back together.

“I still think you should join me for a session one of these days,” he mentioned conversationally and you lightly rolled your eyes because it wasn’t the first time that he had brought that up to you.

“Maybe,” you shrugged noncommittally. Namjoon sighed deeply before turning his chair around so that he was facing you.  

“You know, if you don’t want to work on this, you can tell me,” he softly reminded you. “But I would like to know.”

“I don’t know,” you told him. “And I’ve told you that before. I don’t know if I’m willing to just forget about everything that’s happened because you had some sudden moment of clarity.”

“And I understand that,” he replied but you cut him off.

“But do you really?” You demanded to know and he frowned a little.

“Only on a surface level,” he admitted. “That’s why I think it would be good for us if we went to therapy together. We both have communication issues so having someone else there could help the conversation be more productive, for the both of us.”

“I’ll think about it,” you relented, making a small smile appear on his face again.

“That’s all I’m asking for,” he nodded, reaching out and grabbing onto one of your hands, squeezing it firmly. “I love you.”

“I know you do, and I do love you too Joon,” you replied.

“I know,” he echoed, letting go of your hand as one of his coughing fits started up. That had been one of the side effects of the injuries that Namjoon had sustained from the shooting: his breathing was more restricted than before, and he still wasn’t used to having to pace himself in between words in order to make sure that he was breathing correctly.

“Do you have your inhaler here?” You asked him and he shook his head as he lifted his elbow to his mouth as he continued to cough harshly. “I’ll go get the one from our room, I’ll be right back.” You straightened up and walked out of his office, shutting the door behind you. You weren’t able to make it too far before you ran right into Taehyung, Momo, and Jimin.

“Hey,” you greeted them, your eyes fluttering over to Jimin just in time to see him smile warmly at you.

“Hey yourself,” Momo smirked knowingly. “How’s he doing in there?”

“Oh, he’s fine,” you shrugged, glancing over your shoulder at Namjoon’s office door. “He’s insistent on getting back to work so there’s really nothing I can say to him right now. The real question though, is what the hell are you doing here mister?” You demanded as you looked at Taehyung, who smiled sheepishly as he adjusted the sling on his arm. 

“I just came to show Momo where I keep things before I officially start my leave of absence,” he told you. Taehyung had only gotten out of the hospital a little more than a week ago, his severe injuries taking longer to heal and even now, he was still in pretty bad shape. After a lot of discussion with both his family and Namjoon, Taehyung had decided to take an extended leave of absence until he had fully healed and Momo was going to be taking his place as Chief of Staff.

“Yep, Namjoon is going to be able to officially order me around starting tomorrow,” Momo groaned, making you laugh. “And Jimin joined us since Taehyung coordinates Namjoon’s schedule with him.”

“We just want to make the transition as seamless as possible, even if it is temporary,” Jimin added. 

“Yeah, so hurry the hell up and get better so that you can come back,” Momo demanded as she looked at Taehyung, but you knew that she meant it lovingly. 

“We’re definitely gonna miss you around here,” you nodded in agreement, stepping forward and giving Taehyung a one armed hug. 

“I’ll only be gone two months, maybe three,” he reassured you. 

“Well, come on Tae, I’ll walk you out,” Momo said and Taehyung nodded.

“See you guys,” he called, waving his hand at you and Jimin before following Momo off down the hall. Once you couldn’t see them, you turned back to Jimin, who was already looking at you. 

“Hey stranger,” he greeted softly, holding his hand out towards you and you instantly grabbed onto his hand, allowing him to pull you down the hallway into his office. Once the two of you were inside, he shut the door behind you before wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling your body flush to his. You reached up and set your hand on his cheek, moaning softly once he kissed you passionately. The two of you stayed like that for a few minutes, firm kisses against each other’s lips and wandering hands. 

“I’ve missed you,” you admitted quietly, and he pulled away from your mouth and set his forehead against yours as he looked at you.

“I’ve missed you too,” he smiled softly. “Although, we wouldn’t be missing each other so much if you would just come and see me.”

“I know, but things are just complicated right now,” you replied. Jimin knew about Namjoon wanting to win you back, because you had decided to be honest with him and tell him. He knew that you still loved Namjoon and you telling him about it only confirmed it, but you also didn’t want him to think that you weren’t serious when you’d said that you loved him. Despite this, the two of you hadn’t been able to spend much time together since Namjoon had gotten discharged from the hospital.

“I know, and I understand,” he promised, setting his hand underneath your chin. “I just want to be able to see you more.”

“Are you free tonight?” You asked and he nodded his head. “Then I’ll come over to your place, and stay the night,”

“You sure?” He checked. “I don’t want you to feel like I’m pressuring or forcing you.”

“You’re not,” you assured him with a smile. “I’ve missed you and wanna show you how much.”

“God, I’d love that,” he huffed, making you laugh before you leaned forward to press another lingering kiss to his lips. “8pm sound good? We can order in and watch movies.”

“That’ll work,” you nodded. “I’m looking forward to it Jimin.”

“Me too,” he smiled. “I love you baby bird.”

“I love you too,” you grinned, giving him one last kiss and a quick hug before he unwrapped his arms from around you and watched as you stepped out of his office.  

...................................

“God, you look so fucking gorgeous riding my cock like this,” Jimin grunted, reaching down and squeezing the flesh of your ass as you moved up and down on him on the couch that was in his living room. You had originally only come over to watch movies and spend time with him but being as though you and Jimin hadn’t been intimate since the day of the shooting, it was only a matter of time before you two got your hands on each other.

“Please Jimin,” you pleaded, setting both of your hands on the sides of his neck and placing your forehead against his. The eye contact between the two of you served to only intensify the feeling of his cock dragging along your inner walls, and you felt your thighs quiver as you neared your high. 

“I love you,” he whispered into the space between your lips and you smiled, because you were able to also feel his words in addition to him saying them aloud.

“I love you too,” you replied back, leaning forward a little and gently pressing your lips to his. “I do.”

“I know,” he assured you, planting his feet firmly on the floor and thrusting up into you. You gasped, the belt that had been tightening around your lower abdomen threatening to snap at any moment. 

“Gonna come,” you warned him, and he nodded as he continued to fuck into you. 

“Go ahead baby,” he encouraged you. A few more thrusts and you were coming on his length, a long and drawn out moan escaping your throat as he fucked you into over sensitivity. “You always look so sexy when you come for me.”

“Mm, wait, stop,” you mumbled and Jimin did so, looking up at you with a raised eyebrow. “Want you to come in my mouth.”

“Holy shit baby bird,” he huffed, watching in awe as you lifted yourself up and off of his cock and stood up from the couch, bending your knees until they touched the floor and making yourself comfortable in between his legs. You reached out and grabbed ahold of his cock with both hands, wasting no time in taking him into your mouth and swallowing as much as you were able to.

“God dammit,” Jimin hissed, his hands reaching out at his sides and fisting the material of the couch. You continued to bob your head on him, reveling in the way that his thighs tensed up on the sides of you as he neared his high once again.

“I’m about to come Y/N-ah,” he grit out and you only responded by sucking on hi harder. A few seconds later, you felt his cum flood into your mouth, the salty flavor making you cringe a little. Once you had (literally) sucked him dry, you popped his cock out of your mouth and smiled up at him.

“Good?” You wondered and he scoffed in disbelief.

“Fucking amazing,” he chuckled, which made you grin. “Come here.” He held his hand out for you and when you placed your hand in his, he pulled you up so that you were standing again and then pulled you back onto the couch, your body falling in between his legs as he pressed you up against his chest. 

“I’ve missed you, you know,” he murmured quietly.

“I know, and I’ve missed you,” you told him. “The shooting just literally turned everything on it’s head, and it’s like I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“I’m gonna ask you a question, and I want you to be honest with me, ok?” He said and you nodded in agreement. “Do you want to be with Namjoon?”

“I don’t know,” you answered honestly after a few seconds of silence. “On one hand, the effort that he’s putting in now is what I’ve been begging him for and I also feel bad about everything that happened. On the other hand though, I love you and I deserve to be happy after everything that I’ve been through with Namjoon.”

“You really do,” Jimin agreed with a nod. “Look, you can make a decision on your own, because you’re an adult. All I ask is that you be honest with me about what you’re thinking, bad or otherwise. Ok?”

“Ok, I promise,” you swore. 

“You doing ok though?” Jimin asked. “Besides that?”

“Yeah. Why do you ask?”

“You’ve seemed a little distracted, and not only tonight,” he noted, reaching up and setting his hand on your cheek. 

“I’m fine,” you nodded, not exactly wanting to tell him that Namjoon had asked if you wanted to get dinner together and you had to lie to him about already having plans with Momo so that you wouldn’t have to tell him that you were going to see and spend the night with Jimin. Despite all that, you couldn’t help but to be touched at how Jimin was still concerned about you even though you were basically dangling both him and Namjoon right now. 

“I just want you to be happy,” he shrugged.

“And I you,” you whispered, leaning forward and kissing him firmly. “Regardless.”

...................................

Tag List:  @toddsgirl27 @leftieaquarius @joyfulkmusicfan @jennyjq @xcharlottemikaelsonx @pop228 @belatona @babebri144 @dragonqueen01 @paolaa9700 @yiarsan @sunshinein17 @daydreambrliever @lyralefayc @weirdestpersoninearth @peachesandcreamsthings @missseoulite @ramengrace @minyoongi-infiresme @0minabean0 @korkanswers @dchimminie @mysr3 @emily2404xx @leilalago @vonvi-blog @btsxdoll @heartfeltscribblings @nooooooooona @eternalmoonji @lyralefay @jikooksgirl19 @cloudbuffalo @moonsjoons @kjooniesbabygirl @anpanman-sonyeondan @midnight-storm @joondala @lolsiiike @missyjo118 @kookiestaejam @jertazz @xwallowsx @yourlipssoirresistible @brittneymccray @swoozleee @behind-the-surface @cheysjimin​ @gemad08​

[thatfanficstuff]

The Bet - Elijah Mikaelson

This fic is based on the above gif that was submitted as a request on wattpad. Not my gif. (it was on giphy)

Pairing: Elijah x chubby! reader

Warnings: uh...I don’t think so. reader bitching about clothes not fitting. 

A/N: I actually kind of love this. It’s pretty fluffy. 

***

“Please, Y/N?” Rebekah practically begged as she bounced on her feet in your kitchen. She’d shown up early and you’d let her in before shuffling over to the coffee maker. The pot had just finished brewing and you poured yourself a generous portion. Once you were leaned against the counter with your mug in hand, the blonde had immediately started in.

She wanted you to go shopping with her. The Mikaelsons were having a party and, while she didn’t need a new dress, she insisted you did. You sighed and sat the mug on the counter behind you.

“There are two problems with this, Bekah. One, I had no intention of going to the party and two, I hate shopping.”

The vampire looked almost disgusted at your admission. You’d try to explain it to her, but she’d never understand. You were on the heavier side and shopping was such a chore. It wasn’t that you were embarrassed about your weight, but you were practical. They just didn’t make pretty things for girls like you. Designers seemed to think that anyone over a size 10 wanted to wear potato sacks with weird patterns on them. Rebekah didn’t have to worry with any of that. She was stunning. Her biggest problem was trying to decide between too many choices while you might spend hours and not find a single thing that you liked.

“You always go shopping with me. Why didn’t you tell me you hated it?” The blonde was almost pouting.

“I don’t mind shopping for you. Shopping for you is easy. Shopping for me is a pain.”

“What? Why?”

You literally face palmed before smiling at her. “Bekah. Honey. I’m just a bit bigger than you. It’s harder to find stuff for me. Especially dresses.”

“Ridiculous,” she snapped immediately and rolled her eyes. “And as for the other…” She pulled out her phone and sent a message to someone.

You just sipped at your coffee and watched her over your mug. Finally, she smirked in what could only be described as triumph. She kept her eyes glued to her phone as she walked to your front door.

“You should have just gone shopping with me, Y/N.” And with that, she was gone.

You blinked several times before shaking your head and setting your mug in the sink. “Strange girl,” you murmured to yourself just as another knock sounded at your door.

“Seriously, Bekah?” you grumbled though you wore a smile on your face. You opened the door only to gasp when you were greeted not with your best friend but her older, hot as sin brother. Holy Shit. “Elijah. I wasn’t expecting you.” Hopefully he would attribute your suddenly racing heart to surprise.

The corner of his mouth kicked up in a smile and his eyes ran over you from head to toe. “Hello, Y/N. Lovely to see you, as always.”

Suddenly realizing you were standing in front of him in nothing but a long sleep shirt and socks you gave a little scream and slammed the door. You could hear him chuckle through the door. “Just a minute.” You threw open the closet next to you and yanked out your long raincoat and wrapped it around you before tying it off.

A glance in the mirror had you gasping in horror. Your hair was a mess and mascara smudged your eyes. Could you possibly look any worse? A swipe of your fingers took care of the worst of the makeup and your feeble attempt at least made your hair look passable. After taking a deep breath, you opened the door again. “Sorry. I thought you were Bekah.” Heat flooded your face. Why did you always make a fool of yourself in front of this man? Why not Klaus?

“If that’s how you greet my sister, perhaps I should accompany her to your home more often.” The teasing lilt to his voice had a tremor moving through you. Was Elijah Mikaelson flirting? With you? Not possible.

You cleared your throat and stepped back from the door. “Would you like to come in?”

He nodded and came inside. You shut the door behind him and followed him into the kitchen. You always hung out in your kitchen. It was your favorite room in the house. When he simply studied you with pursed lips, you decided to speak up. “Is there something I can do for you, Elijah?”

He licked his lips. “Rebekah tells me you are not coming to the party this evening. May I ask why not?”

You shrugged. “You guys don’t need me there. You’ll have a house full. I’ll just be hanging around on the fringes anyway and one of you will feel the need to entertain me. It’s better if I just stay home. Netflix is calling my name, anyway.”

Elijah didn’t appear impressed with your answer. “You seem to be under the impression that you are an afterthought on the guest list. On the contrary, yours was the first name added that was not myself or one of my siblings. Many could fail to attend and not be missed. You, however, are not one of them.”

Any argument you could make against that would only sound petty. You sighed. “Fine, let’s say I buy that. I still don’t have anything to wear.”

“I’m personally fond of the shirt you’re wearing under that ridiculous coat.”

“Elijah Mikaelson,” you scolded.

He laughed again. He seemed to do that a lot more lately than he used to. It was probably because his mother was dead. She was a bitch. “Then we shall buy something for you to wear, Y/N.”

The ‘we’ didn’t escape your notice. You huffed a laugh. “Elijah, I find it impossible to believe that even you with your vast resources will find something that I am happy with in the time we have.”

He narrowed his eyes and leaned toward you, that smirk stretching his lips once more. “Are you challenging me?”

You found yourself returning the smile. “So, what if I am? You’ll lose.”

“Will I? Interesting. A wager then?”

“What sort of wager?” You’d been friends with the Mikaelsons for too long not to suspect he was up to something. You were being cautious.

“If you are correct and our shopping excursion is fruitless, I will pay for your Netflix subscription for the next year. In addition, I will personally make sure your snack cabinet is filled weekly.”

You bit your lip and his eyes flashed. It was tempting, but not enough. You shook your head. “All that, plus one movie night a week. I pick the film. You are of course excused for supernatural drama.”

“Fine.”

He agreed entirely too quickly. You should have asked for more, but honestly you couldn’t think of anything better than cuddling with Elijah and watching movies even if it was purely platonic on his part. “And what do you want if you win?”

“When I win, you will of course come to the party tonight, but you will come as my date.”

Your brows snapped together as you frowned. That didn’t make any sense.

Elijah grinned and stepped closer to you. You swallowed. “And you will stay by my side all evening. You will not hide in the corner or in Niklaus’s study or my library. You will be sociable.”

Oh, god. You rolled your eyes. “Fine.”

He held up a finger. “That’s not all, dear Y/N. I, too, desire a weekly movie night. I will pick the film and you will come to my home to watch it.”

“What’s the catch?”

He shrugged. “No catch.” He ran one finger along the edge of the counter. “Have I mentioned my affinity for horror movies?”

“Damn it, ‘lijah.” You didn’t hate horror movies, but they made you jumpy. Watching them in a house full of vampires that loved to tease you was unlikely to help. Finally, you grumbled. “Fine.”

Elijah grinned in triumph.

“It’s not like you’re going to win anyway.”

***

There was one store that you loved. In fact, the vast majority of the clothes you owned were from there, but they weren’t dresses. They weren’t expensive by any stretch but they were a little pricier than you liked so you tended to hit their clearance when you could. But you weren’t paying today, Elijah was. You knew there was no point arguing with him. He’d just compel the clerk not to take your money.

You’d found a couple of skirts to try, but it was Elijah that found the dress. When he showed it to you, you gasped just a little. It was beautiful, but not something you’d ever considered wearing before. It looked like something straight out of the forties or fifties, from the cut to the pattern. Normally you wouldn’t even try it on, but you shrugged and took it from him. Why not try it?

You saved it for last, knowing it wouldn’t fit right. You wanted to postpone the disappointment. But it slid on smoothly and fell gracefully. After smoothing down the fabric you finally looked at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes wide, you spun and took in your appearance.

He won. Holy shit. He actually won.

***

Elijah tapped the glass in his hand and glanced up the stairs for the hundredth time. What could possibly be taking you and his sister so long? You hadn’t let him see you in the dress, but you assured him that he’d won. Surprisingly, you hadn’t argued with him at all about him not only buying the dress but getting your shoes and accessories as well. He was a bit disgruntled that you hadn’t let him see any of it.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were nervous, brother,” Niklaus said as he stepped up beside him.

“Thank you, Niklaus. Most helpful as always.” Elijah straightened the cuffs of his suit.

The hybrid hummed. “You do know that you could just tell her you love her? I am quite certain she feels the same.”

Elijah sighed. “Are you finished?”

His brother chuckled and held up his hands. “All right, I’ll go, brother.”

Elijah watched him walk off before shooting another glance up the stairs. Still nothing.

“Hello, Elijah,” Kol said from behind him.

“Is there something I can do for you?”

He shook his head. “No. Rebekah just assured me that you’ll be speechless when you see her. I didn’t want to miss it.”

Elijah closed his eyes and counted silently in his head. His irritation came from nerves, so he was attempting not to snap at Kol.

A hand rested on his shoulder and Elijah looked to find his youngest brother grinning like a fool while he looked up the stairs. “Klaus is right. You should tell her you love her before someone beats you to it.”

Elijah turned then, his eyes going wide as he caught sight of you. You were perfection. The dress he’d picked for you caressed your curves just as he hoped they would. You’d paired it with wide heels and your hair had been done in a style to match the dress. A flower the same color as your shoes was pinned in your hair. He couldn’t stop staring at you.

Kol nudged him. “You have a little drool—”

“Fuck off, Kol.” Elijah moved up the stairs to meet you.

***

You looked up then from where you’d been watching your footing to make sure you didn’t trip. The look of awe on Elijah’s face made you smile. That was all you’d wanted. To know that for just one moment you’d stunned him. What an amazing feeling.

He took your hand in his and turned it to place a gentle kiss on your wrist. When he met your gaze again, he offered you a soft smile. “You look stunning.”

“I don’t know that I’d go that far, but thank you, Elijah.” You shifted your hips just a bit so the dress flared out at the hem. This dress was awesome.

“There’s something I think I need to explain to you, Y/N.”

You tilted your head and waited for him to continue. He linked his fingers with yours and led you down the rest of the steps and into Klaus’s study. Releasing you, he shut the door and began to pace the floor. Finally, he stopped and looked at you. “I don’t care if you hide.”

“Huh?”

“The bet. The only part I cared about was you being here as my date. I wanted you to stay beside me simply so I wouldn’t be without your company. It was a win-win situation anyway. If I lost, I was guaranteed one night a week with you in my arms.”

“That’s why you added that to your terms? The movie night here?”

He nodded once.

You took a breath for courage. “Just tell me plainly what you want to say, Elijah. If you don’t, I’ll just think I imagined whatever I infer from this conversation.”

He closed the distance between you and placed his hands on your upper arms. “Very well. I love you. I have for quite some time now. If you tell me I have a chance with you, this will be the happiest day I’ve had in a thousand years.”

You closed your eyes and chuckled. “I’ve been head over heels from the first time I met you, ‘Lijah. I don’t wear that raincoat for just anyone, you know?”

“I would hope not.” He moved closer as he spoke and searched your gaze. Whatever he found there must have been satisfactory because you were suddenly being kissed. And it was fantastic.

The two of you explored each other’s mouths for a bit before Elijah leaned back. “We could skip the party and hide in my room. Just you, me and Netflix.”

You took his hand and tugged him toward the door as you grinned at him. “And waste this dress? I think not.”

[daily-dose-of-imagines]

Hitmen AU! | Head Canons | 19+ [Haikyuu!!]

KΛЯΛƧЦПӨ [PART i] [PART ii] [PART iii]

Here is the last part for the Karasuno head canons~! I hope you guys enjoy these~! Expect some drabbles or one shots or even other specific head canons~! 

The next team I’ll be setting up for is Nekoma~!

Again, feel free to ask questions or request anything from this AU! (Specify so I know~!)

» » Admin Ko

»»————-　♔　————-««

T̷o̷b̷i̷o̷ ̷K̷a̷g̷e̷y̷a̷m̷a̷

One of the gifted snipers on the team

or well, that’s what Tsukishima likes to say 

is actually one of the all rounders in the group, but is usually hired for quick assassinations

usually paired off with Hinata which begins and ends with bickering, but holy shit do they get the job done

honestly has one of the more terrifying attitudes in the group when it comes to perfecting his skill

is usually sparring or at a shooting range to get the cleanest shot

whenever he can he’ll take classes on human anatomy and human behavior to better predict his targets and what they’ll do

accidentally shot his mentor’s ear (luckily it only really grazed the area so he has a scar now)

has a tsundere sort of attitude after warming up to his fellow teammates

is the one who’s out most of the time due to the high demand in quick assassinations.

“Target in sight. Decoy ready when you are.” 

The sharp tone in his voice left no room for mistakes as the lean male adjusted his position slightly.

Icy blue eyes focusing in on the figure behind the glass as he shifted the sniper in his hand to a better angle. Letting out a slow and even sigh, the young male positioned his fingers on the trigger. His eyes never leaving the scope as he watched the target interact with their Decoy. Observing the attitude and mannerisms of the target he adjusted himself once more.

It was better to be precise with this one, after all it was their initiation assignment and the male refused to be denied by another team. 

When he saw the signal from the orange haired Decoy, the figure didn’t hesitate to pull the trigger as he waited with baited breath until the target’s body fell into an ungraceful heap on the floor. A sinister grin on his features as he finally relaxed before relaying the information to base.

“Target neutralized.”

Out of all of the rookies, he is the second tallest 

built sturdy yet lean. Not too buff, not too undertone, but just right

Frequents the gym as much as he can and spars with Hinata every other two hours

has at least 3 tattoos on his body 

likes to keep his hair either side swept or slicked back during missions (no obstructions in his eyes when he shoots) but normally has it down when around the base

likes to wear anything protective yet skin tight to keep him from being hindered in any way at making a clean kill

is emotionally constipated

his s/o is confused the first time he confesses but comes to adore it

comes off as an ice prince but just doesn’t know how to give good affection

was scolded by Sugawara and Daichi for trying to ‘get rid’ of someone who was annoying s/o

is an awkward baby with affection but oml when he’s stressed and needs some relief just-- oof

S̴h̴o̴y̴o̴ ̴H̴i̴n̴a̴t̴a̴

Bright and energetic, one of the more unexpected members to join their group

tried to be a sniper and almost ended up killing Kageyama

it’s no surprise he’s banned from using guns after this

is a master in jumping the target or any sort of kidnap or capture assignments 

was hesitant on becoming a decoy, but once paired with Kageyama for their initiation mission he fell in l o v e with it

is kinda psychotic 

he loves the thrill of seeing a target so badly corrupted crumbling dead at his feet

is surprisingly a smooth talker

loves to spar and learn new skills so he takes up behind Noya to learn as many skills as he can and to be useful in any situation

Like Sugawara, he prefers using knives or daggers in close combat fights

“Is that so? Well hey! I know a better area where we can discuss that deal of yours.” Suave and friendly, the ginger began leading the target towards the area he and Kageyama had agreed on. 

The immaculate suit he wore hugged his body nicely as he ran a hand through his unruly hair as he played out the various possibilities that could occur in his head. Though of course snapped out of it as he placed his facade on as he walked with the target. Easily flowing with the conversation despite the heavy desire to gut the corrupted individual before him.

“I see, I see. That truly does sound incredible...” He began walking over to the window as he watched the target follow in the reflection before sighing. 

“Though I can’t really say I agree completely with your ideas. That is-- I can’t agree with them until you're nothing but a corpse at my feet.” He stated coolly, hazel eyes glowing with malice as an unsettling look graced his features.

Before the tainted figure could even retaliate, the sharp sound of wind cut through the air as a bullet sat neatly in the center of the man’s head.

“Pity we couldn’t talk more, but I really want to get a more interesting mission you see?” 

the second shortest among the male members 

is a thiccq boi with broad shoulders 

is very toned too and scarily strong 

tried to arm wrestle with Kageyama, and surprisingly ended it as a tie

undercut ginger boi 

has a couple of piercings on his ears and a nice handful of tattoos painting his body 

is an absolute sunshine with his s/o 

rarely ever gets mad at his s/o, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get frustrated

likes to pick up his s/o to combine their heights to be tall

he learned that from Noya

his s/o always gets embarrassed when he demands to combine their heights to be tall

loves to listen to s/o’s heartbeat when they sleep

K̷e̷i̷ ̷T̷s̷u̷k̷i̷s̷h̷i̷m̷a̷

2/2 of the brain and tactics hub

a sarcastic and blunt boi who absolutely hates incompetent people

very smart and clever

hella observant as well and makes his moves accordingly

avoids Noya whenever he can, but usually ends up caught in some sort of experiment with his senior 

immensely loves to psychologically torture their targets that are brought to base 

is the “good” cop to Noya’s “bad” cop during interrogations

loves to pick apart at people’s brains and their mental stability 

Definitely mocks the other rookies whenever he can

“Haa? So this is my initiation?” A blank look crossed the blond’s features as he adjusted his glasses before a wicked smirk settled on his lips. The slow psychological torture he could do, and learn from had excitement flood his veins as he sat before the man.

A wave of his hand dismissed the two other daunting figures in the room as he took a once over of the person before him. 

“A week huh? I suppose that gives me enough time to peel back the layers of that pile of mush you call a brain.” He stated as he casually shrugged his shoulders before golden irises bore deeply into the figure before him.

“I suppose we should start now with keeping you awake for as long as your pea-sized brain can handle.”

Is the tallest out of the rookies 

loves to use it to his advantage to mock Hinata 25/8

Has a lean yet toned body, but has more of a physique similar to Sugawara’s 

long messy blond locks always be in the bed head state 

has one tattoo and a a couple of piercings 

is an absolute ass to his s/o, but makes up for it with cute small affectionate gestures

is emotional constipated baby number 2

is able to read their s/o well, but doesn’t dwell on it too much as he doesn’t want to be too invasive

can immediately tell when their s/o is off or something is bothering them

will immediately tell them that he has no problems quelling the problem that is bothering them with a eerily placed smile

T̴a̴d̴a̴s̴h̴i̴ ̴Y̴a̴m̴a̴g̴u̴c̴h̴i̴

A soft baby, another unexpected addition to the rookies

has a similar energy to Hinata, but just a lot more tamer in retrospect

is usually with Ennoshita gathering information as well as learning tips and tricks on the cyber aspect of their work

takes the time to learn coding as well as researching other defense mechanisms that can help keep wandering eyes off of their business

usually seen with Tsukishima in the base’s library 

on occasion will be dragged to do sparring with the other rookies 

is the defense and attack on their cyber end alongside Ennoshita

Stretching his back, the figure let out a pleased sigh as he felt his body relax from the tension built as he sat hunched over the multiple computers around him. His eyes briefly skimming over the orders requested and the many attempts at trying to pry into their servers. 

Grasping the cooled mug of coffee, he took a sip as he couldn’t help but let out an irritated sigh as another attempt to breach their firewalls had been commenced. Without a second wasted, he began typing and tapping away with one hand as he took another sip of his coffee before fully immersing himself in not only humiliating the hacker, but exposing them to the rest of the deep dark web with absolutely no hesitation.

His senior glancing over with a hum of approval before resuming his own work as the young male couldn’t help but smile and feel giddy at the delight of approval from his senior.

Is the third tallest member in the rookie squad

out of all the male rookies, he is the scrawniest

but still has enough mass and muscle definition to defend himself if he were to be attacked alone

again, is dragged to spar with the other rookies often 

long medium length hair that is usually pulled back into a half man bun / half pony tail

has one tattoo on his back

is an absolute sweetheart with his s/o

unfortunately doesn’t get the most time with his s/o due to the constant cyber attacks 

but when he is lucky enough for a vacation week he pours all his pent up stress and affections towards them 

loves to just stay in and cuddle with his s/o

H̷i̷t̷o̷k̷a̷ ̷Y̷a̷c̷h̷i̷

The decoy that never was

Initially, when she joined she had tried to be a decoy like Hinata and Kiyoko, but ended up not doing too well in that

though to everyone’s surprise her skill isn’t in decoy, but quick draw gun work

she works alongside Kageyama and trains in utilizing her skills and honing in on her shots 

is usually the back up in case a target manages to get out into the open

never uses more than 3 shots to take down a target 

is the most awkward and soft spoken in their group, but is just as happy and energetic as Hinata

“Yachi-san! The target is turning onto your street!”

The aggravated voice of her teammate rang in her ears as she winced slightly before pulling out a pistol with ease. Her honey brown eyes skimming the area for any abnormal figures as she let the bickering between her two other teammates drown out into nothingness.

A slow and steady breath escaped her as she slipped into the dim alleyway as she heard the scuffling and ragged breathing of a large figure stumbling down the empty streets. With practiced ease, she took aim. Her eyes turning stone cold as she shot once into the target’s leg.

A stumble and he was on a knee. The second shot struck his shoulder as he suddenly fell forward and the young gun slinger stepped out from the shadows as she walked towards the soon to be corpse as she tuned back into the conversation between her teammates.

“Target found. Target neutralized.”

Despite being the shortest member of the rookies she can pack quite the punch

is well toned and lean

Mid-length blond hair that’s usually put in a messy bun or a high pony tail

like the others, she has at least 2 tattoos scattered over her body 

tends to lean towards form fitting clothes like Kageyama for ease of access and speed to engage and neutralize a target

she is immensely doting on her s/o 

loves to smother her s/o in kisses and affection while doing the most normal things she can before going to work

likes to watch movies and thread her fingers through s/o’s hair whenever they have a stay in door date

[thomasandhissides]

Forbidden Fruit- Part 2

ao3 | part 1 | part 2 | Part 3

Roman laughed as he walked off stage, turning to Logan as soon as they were out of view of the crowd.

“Holy shit,” Roman pushed his sweat soaked hair off his forehead. “It feels so good to be performing again. And we’re getting interviewed tonight!” He was giddy off of adrenaline and excitement. “How cool is that?” Logan smiled at his friend as they walked back to the dressing to the room to get prepared for their upcoming interview.

“I will admit it is cool until the reporter turns into an asshole and asks the dumb questions,” Logan said, shooting finger guns.

“You know they’re going to,” Roman rolled his eyes as he pulled his damp shirt off, tossing it off to the side. “You think Remus will be watching?” He asked softly as he grabbed a new shirt, pulling it on. “I mean, it’s not like I care if he does or not. You know what, it was a dumb question.” He shook his head as he changed into a new pair of jeans.

“I don’t think it’s dumb,” Logan protested, “He’s your only brother. And your only family.” He pointed out as he watched his friend pace the room.

“No he’s not,” Roman scoffed, sitting on the edge of the makeup counter. “I’ve got you. We both know you’re a better brother to me than that deadbeat.”

“The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb I guess.” Logan recited uncomfortably, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

“Exactly,” Roman smiled, glad Logan was at least playing along. “I’ve got everything I need in this room. Anyways, enough of that. Get changed, we’ve got an interview soon. I want us to look good.” Logan let out a heavy sigh and nodded.

Roman smiled as him and Logan stood in front of the camera, a reporter with them getting ready for the interview. Logan stood next to him, face solemn as the reporter asked his questions.

“So Roman, you took a six month hiatus from performing,” The reporter started. Logan looked at Roman with a ‘you know where this is going look.’ 

“That we did,” Roman nodded with his response. Their interviewer smiled as he prepared for his next question.

“What happened to Remus?” The reporter stared expectantly. Logan’s eyes widened and he looked to Roman, almost wanting to take over the question himself.

“He left due to… personal reasons,” Roman shrugged. “Not really my place to say what those reasons were. In all honesty, I’m glad he left.” Logan’s jaw dropped and he glared at Roman.

“Why would you say something like that Roman?” He hissed under his breath so only Roman could hear him.

“Was the personal reason you, Roman? After all rumors have been surfacing…”the reporter instigated. Roman rolled his eyes.

“Oh they’re just that, rumors,” He shook his head. “Why would I make my dear brother leave the band?”

“So he didn’t leave because of you calling him, and I quote ‘disgusting and filthy,’ not to mention ‘unpredictable and loud’?” Roman paused as the memories of the argument came flooding back.

“Absolutely not,” Roman snapped, crossing his arms. He was starting to get pissed off now. He relaxed a little when Logan rested a loving hand on his shoulder.

“Either ask questions that matter or we’re done here,” Logan defended, squeezing Roman’s shoulder lightly.

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!” Roman screamed, slamming the door behind Logan.

“Roman, please, calm down,” Logan begged in an attempt to defuse the ticking time bomb that was Roman’s anger.

“Calm down? Calm down?! That reporter had exact quotes from our argument. You and I both know who tipped him off. That incel is trying to ruin me!” Roman screamed.

“Roman, with all due respect, that is probably the stupidest thing you’ve ever come to the conclusion of,” Logan deadpanned, crossing his arms. “While I don’t disagree that the source was Remus, you don’t actually believe he wants to ruin your career, do you?”

“After I swore I would make it big. He said ‘We’ll see about that’ Logan. You think too highly of him.” Roman screamed, slamming his hands on the table.”

“Clearly you don’t know about the conversation I had with him before he left,” Logan wasn’t the least bit phased by Roman’s outburst of anger, they had been happening a lot more often recently. “He didn’t want to leave, I can tell you that. You were too hard on him.”

“If you keep siding with him, you can join him,” Roman sneered venomously, an evil glint in his eye. Now that had an effect on Logan. He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Roman.

“I’m not siding with anyone. I’m simply stating facts. Your brother cares about you, you were too hard on the kid, and you’re acting like a bratty baby. Now knock it off,” Logan really felt like a dad chastising a particularly stubborn toddler.

“We need a new member,” Roman said after taking a breath to calm himself.

“You’re right about that,” Logan agreed with a nod. “And I think I have the perfect candidate.”

____

“Look at his face,” Janus cackled, watching Roman on TV. Remus laughed as he hopped on the couch next to Janus, bringing his cigarette to his lips.

“This is probably the best idea you’ve ever gone through with,” He took a hit and blew the smoke into the air, knocking the ashes off into a nearby ashtray. “I’m loving this.”

“Look at this buffoon lying through his teeth,” Janus rolled his eyes, “Someone should really knock him down a peg.” Remus nodded in agreement as he watched his brother through the screen.

“That’s why you’re here,” He chuckled. “Look at him making a fool of himself. Surely put him in his place.”

“You know what would also hurt him? Stealing the Battle of the Bands Award from him,” Janus looked suggestively. Remus smirked and nodded.

“That’s exactly what we’re going to do. There’s no way he’s gonna win. Have you heard their recent stuff? They were so much better with me,” He leaned against his friend with an evil grin. 

“I still have to convince our last member to join us,” Janus groaned, pushing Remus off of him.

“Why haven’t you introduced him yet?” Remus pouted, straightening his shirt as he was shoved off with a pout. “I wanna meet the kid.”

“Because we actually want him to join us,” Janus said sarcastically as a knock rang throughout the apartment. Remus pouted, mocking Janus as he got up to answer the door.

“Behave,” Janus warned Remus as he opened the door.

“I thought I had the wrong address for a minute,” Virgil laughed nervously, wrapping his hoodie around himself protectively.

“Nope we just live in the ghetto,” Remus shouted, earning a glare from Janus.

“Glad to know,” Virgil muttered, walking inside all the way when Janus stepped aside. “Is this the guy you were talking about, Jan?”

“Yep this is the trash man,” Janus said ironically. Virgil let out a soft laugh at the insult thrown towards Remus.

“I hope he’s not as bad as you describe him,” He looked towards Remus. “I’m Virgil.” He introduced himself.

“He’s worse,” Janus muttered. “Remus, manners.” He warned before Remus could even open his mouth.

“Why don’t we just get to the point?” Remus groaned.Janus shot him a threatening look before leading Virgil to the couch. Virgil sat on the couch and looked between the two band members expectantly. 

“We want to start a band and try for the Battle of the Band Award.” Janus confessed, “For that, we need a new member and we hoped you would help us with that.” Virgil sat there in silence for a second, trying to process their request.

“What exactly would be my part?” Virgil bit his lip, a nervous habit. “I’m not exactly talented.” He shrugged. “I guess I can play guitar.” 

“You just need to play guitar and look hot. Back me up here dude,” Remus said, looking to Janus for support.

“You’re the perfect addition,” Janus shrugged, doing his best to sound supportive. He didn’t want to scare him off yet. “We need a guitarist.”

“What’s in it for me?” Virgil looked away.

“I don’t know, an infinite amount of dick?” Remus responded.

 Virgil seemed to ponder on the request before nodding.

“I’ll do it,” Virgil agreed.

“Perfect,” Janus smirked. “We have a gig in two days. I’ll send you the music.”

_____

“What are we doing here?” Roman asked as the two entered a concert. There were only a few people there and the lights showed a pale blue color, “I thought we were meeting the new band member.”

“We are,” Logan shushed him. “Just be patient, trust me. He’s good.” He motioned towards the stage. “He’s real underground but I’ve met him a few times, he’s talented.”

“If he’s so talented, why did we come after the performance?” Roman asked. Logan let out a soft chuckle and turned to his friend.

“He’s debuted a new song tonight and I told him we’d be here,” He stated as if it were the simplest thing in the world. “It was sold out, I wouldn’t have been able to get us in so he said to come after and he’ll sing a little sample for you to hear.”

“Well, let’s meet him.” Roman said, gesturing Logan to lead the way. Logan nodded as he brought Roman closer to the stage.

“Hey Pat,” He said to get the attention of the man on the stage. He turned and his smile seemed to light up his whole face at the sight of Logan.

“Logan! You made it,” He smiled and moved towards them, sitting on the edge of the stage.

“This is Patton,” Logan introduced, looking at Roman.

“Pleasure to meet you. I heard you were quite a performer,” Roman complimented, smiling at the young man. Patton flushed red and nodded, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“I guess you could say that,” He smiled. “I made sure they left the mics on so you get the full experience. If you still want me to perform for you guys.” Logan nodded quickly.

“Of course we do, let’s hear it,” Logan took a step back, crossing his arms.

“Break a leg,” Roman smirked, taking a seat at the table in front of the stage. Logan sat down next to him and looked up at Patton.

Patton took a deep breath and stood, picking up the mic that was placed haphazardly on the ground. He let out a soft sigh and closed his eyes for a moment to calm his nerves.

“I hope it’s okay I have to sing this acapella, the music crew is iffy about staying after,” He laughed nervously.

“I don’t mind. Truth be told even I started singing acapella in my room.” Roman smiled warmly. Patton flushed and nodded.

Treat this like any other performance. Patton thought to himself. It’s just your cute friend and his bandmate that you have to impress. No big deal. 

Patton’s voice started out soft, hardly noticeable if it wasn’t for the microphone amplifying his voice. As the first notes slipped from his mouth, Roman watched with a shocked expression. He was good. Really good. The emotion and passion in Patton’s voice almost brought Roman to tears with the emollient tone. When it was over, Roman couldn’t help but stand while clapping his hands, smiling.

“You were exquisite Patton! You have a gift not many people have with your voice and emotion.” Roman complimented, coming up to the stage. Patton couldn’t suppress his smile and he hopped off the side to stand face to face with them. He was a good bit shorter than Roman and had to look up slightly to look him in the eye.

“You really think so?” He played with his hands. “I-I’d love to join you guys.”

“We start tomorrow,” Roman smiled.

[thestarkerisobvious]

The Thing That Lives Under The Bed -- The Conclusion

                                  The Kings of the East

                                    and the Kings of the West

---------------------------

In addition to realizing that he is in love with the thing that lives under his bed, Peter Parker and his friends have also discovered an underground library full of spellbooks, spirits calling out to be freed and the promise of any number of superpowers.

You may be wondering what they did next.

You are getting closer to the answer

----------------------------

Angel wasn’t strong, unless he wanted to be.  He wanted to be now.  He wanted to be strong enough to pull Peter down to the ground, to pull Peter’s body on top of his own, to wrap hungry arms around the older man, and that’s exactly what he did.  Soon he felt Peter’s weight upon his body and Peter’s hips pressing his ass into the hard ground… and he remembered.

Angel wrapped his arms around Peter’s head and kissed him hard, moaning.  He had been confused.  Had forgotten so much.  There was a flood of memories behind his eyelids now, memories of being in this man’s bed, memories of being in this man’s life.  The night before Peter had left for the African consulate, just like he had done on so many of Peter’s night-before-he-lefts,  he had slipped into the man’s childhood bedroom and begged for physical comfort.  Peter would usually give in and submit when Angel offered to go down on him (“I know you’re still hungry” he’d say with an indulgent smile) but that night Peter had actually made love to him, whispering tender endearments against his neck while moving inside him steadily.

“Do you feel me, baby?  Do I feel good inside you, my Angel?  Does my cock feel good inside you?”  Over and over again, whispering and questioning.  Angel was all hunger and desperation, but Peter was always as gentle as if it were their first time, no matter how many times they had done it.  Always asking how it felt, if it felt good, if he wanted it, if he wanted more.  Peter was saying all the things to Angel that he dreamed he would hear from his first lover, and hadn’t.

Angel wasn’t supposed to know that.  But Angel knew.

Even now Peter was equal parts fierce and tender, wrapping one strong arm tightly around Angel’s shoulders and using the other hand to lead Angel’s hand down to his cock, wrapping Angel’s slender fingers around it.  Angel’s fear melted away in that man’s arms.  Whatever else this night held for him, he knew what he meant to Peter.  Peter was a caring and generous lover, and whatever else happened tonight, Angel knew that the High-High Priest of the Coven of St. Cyprian loved him, and loved him with a unique and special passion.

Which is why Angel didn’t falter when Peter started pushing his hand away now.

“No,” he moaned when Angel reached for the string of his own worn-out sweatpants and tried to get them off.  He said it again when Angel started pleading.

“ No,” he said more fiercely, finally taking Angel’s wrist and slamming one hand to the ground in a move that took Angel’s breath away.  Still, Angel argued, panting.

“ Please Peter, I need it, I need you…”

“No, this is wrong.  I said no , Angel, I can’t keep doing this…”

“Please Peter, I love you, I need you inside me…”

“I can’t , Angel.  I make love to you if you’re going to disappear on me.  Then I’m left behind feeling shitty and I can’t take that anymore.”

“I won’t leave, I promise.”

“You’ve promised that before, kid,” he said, holding Angel’s wrist in place.  His eyes were stern, but his tone was gentle.  “And like an idiot I fall for it every time. You promised that the night before I left for the airport to leave for Kenya.  Then I came and when I woke up you were nowhere.  And there I was, left alone and feeling like a monster.  It hurts too much when you disappear on me, Angel.  I can’t explain to you how much it hurts.”

“Hold my hand,” Angel murmured, wriggling his wrist out from Peter’s grip and placing his fingers there instead.  “Hold my hand, and then I won’t disappear on you,” he panted hungrily, squeezing the larger hand in promise.  “Please, Peter, I need it,” he said, squirming beneath the larger man and pressing up against him shamelessly.  No, fearlessly . “You’re hard for me.  I can feel it. You want it too.”

Peter continued to protest, even as Angel squirmed out of his ragged sweats, even as he wrapped greedy legs around Peter’s waist.  Finally he tried to stop Angel’s constant pleading with a kiss, but that only led to more kissing, which, in turn, led to everything Angel wanted.

Angel was good at getting his way.  He remembered that now.

Peter was loving and tender as always, patiently working Angel open with mouth-wet fingers, moving inside him with gentle, steady strokes.  And, just like always, Angel was demanding and ravenous, demanding it faster, harder.  Demanding more .  And Peter gave in.  Maybe Peter was this way with his other lovers, loving and tender and always gentle,  and maybe those other lovers allowed him to be.  But Angel could make him lose control, and Angel reveled in this knowledge.

Peter Parker was an environmental lobbyist AND CEO of the Lavern Post Healing Center AND guru of an entire self-sustaining New-Age spiritual colony by day, a stalwart leader of a coven of skillful and dedicated wizards by night.  He was a wizard like none other, a self-taught master with multiple witchesmarks of great strength, all placed there by the demon he had summoned at 13.  He ruled over both three kingdoms with a steady hand, preaching a constant message of patience, restraint, forbearance, tolerance, long-term planning and, above all, self-control.

And all of that disappeared in Angel’s hungry arms.  In Angel’s arms, the feared and revered Mr. Parker was nothing but thrust and sweat and need .

Even now he was fighting for some control, Angel could tell.  With a devilish grin he raised one leg high enough to work his heels into the small of Peter’s back, laughing with delight when he made the man shuttered and moan.

“Don’t leave me,” Peter cried out helplessly, grabbing Angel’s hand again and pinning it to the ground, crushing it in his grip as he came.

“I won’t leave you master,” Angel whispered, pressing tiny kisses to his lover’s face over and over again.  He lay still as Peter relaxed on top of him, holding him tight.  “I’ll never leave you.  My sweet master.  Yours.  I belong to you.”  He looked up with a grin into the not-full moonlight.  “The spellbook doesn’t exist that can make me leave you.”

“Well, you did bring me the Das Buch Rothenburg …” Peter said with a breathless grin.  “But we stripped it down for parts and sold it to pay for John’s first college degree.

“Oh… fuck Angel…” Peter moaned, rolling onto his back and relaxing against the soft grass, letting the sweat dry from his body in the warm night air.  “Thank you,” he said tenderly, closing his eyes.  “Damn, I didn’t realize how badly I needed that.”  He squeezed the hand he was still holding in his own.  “My angel.  God you’ll never understand how much I love you.  You’ve taught me things about myself I never even knew were there.  I’m a very lucky man, probably the luckiest man in the world.  And I’m damn lucky tonight. I needed that more than you’ll know…”

“That was… wait… what are you doing?”

Angel’s smile was blissful and peaceful.  He held Peter’s hand in both of his own.  Sometimes he brought it to his mouth to kiss it over and over again.  He giggled at the confused look on Peter’s face, and kissed it too.

“Angel,,” Peter said firmly, in his ‘I am commanding you now’ voice.    “Answer me … what are you doing?”

Angel looked down at himself, and the thing his master was looking at.  He had lost all of his clothes, and his pale, skinny body shone white in the moonlight.  At least from the waist up.  From the waist down, there was nothing to see.  He was wading in the ground, the same way the humans could wade in the water.  He giggled at the thought.

“I didn’t leave you, master.  You commanded me not to.  See how well I obeyed you.  But I still went into the ground…”  he giggled again in delight, wondering why he had never thought of it before.

“I didn’t even know you could do that… wait… are you putting your ass in the ground?  Does that mean… every time you went into the ground after I…”

“Your spend is inside me, master,” Angel said, kissing Peter’s face.  He kissed Peter’s eyes, knowing that if his master’s eyes were closed, he wouldn’t see Angel’s expression.

Peter didn’t like it when Angel rolled his eyes.

Still, it was very strange to him, how much his wise master didn’t know.

“Your spend gives me power.  But not like the witchesmark, not like the ambrosia.  It doesn’t feed in the same way, it goes away so fast.  But when I go into the ground, I keep it longer.  It stays inside me.  it makes me stronger .  The night before you left for the consulate, you gave me so much , master.  So much light.  So sweet and loving.  So powerful.  I went into the ground and I stayed there for so long.  To keep it with me.  To keep your light with me while you were gone.  I’m sorry I disobeyed you, master.  But it is my duty to get strong and stay strong.  I was only fulfilling my duty.”

“Jesus fucking Christ you Kings are going to be the death of me,” Peter moaned, letting go of Angel’s hand and using both hands to cover his face.  “I am nixing the idea of eight of you right here and now.  Não.  Nunca.  I don’t care how beautiful John’s new spell is, I’ll never survive it.  There’s only four of you now and I’m not sure I’ll survive.

“Do you… do you remember now, at least?  Do you remember who you are, what your job is?”

Angel looked down at himself, half-buried in the ground, and thought hard.  He only answered because his master was looking at him now.  He answered very carefully, trying to get it right.

“It’s my job... to stay here… to forget about the work that the others are doing.  To stay on the holy land and... feed.  To return to the ground every morning so… so the other three Kings won’t have to.  To return to the land so Oberon and Puck won’t feel homesick.  They aren’t supposed to come back here, but they do come back, because they know I’m lonely.  And it’s not my job to search through the spell books for the other Disciples, but they send me to do it so I can feel helpful.  It’s my job to... to not work.  To stay put.  To stay put and feed.  To feed on the seals of Evorá, to feed on the cattle.  To feed on Matty, but he won’t feed me anymore…”

“And he’s not going to.  I tried to explain this to you, Angel, but… I know it’s hard to understand.  Because it’s a human thing.  When Matt has sex with Tony… well it’s just more casual.  More friendly.  At least it is to Matty.  And what Athanásio and Demetrius do to us, well that’s different.  It’s more intimate, but it’s ceremonial.  But sex with you… you’re not doing anything wrong, Angel, it’s not what you do.  It’s just who you are.  You’re just way too…  intense.  You make Matty feel like he’s “cheating with this best friend’s girl” or something and that’s why he wants you to stop asking.  But you won’t stop asking.  That’s why he’s sharp with you all the time.  Besides you only do what you’re told when he raises his voice, which is weird by the way.  He said the closer we got to the ceremony the worse you got… baby come ‘mere…”

Peter wrapped his arms around what parts of Angel he could and drew him close.  Angel moved through the soil as if it were water, leaning on Peter’s shoulder like a child, snuggling into his arms with a contented smile.  

“God, I can’t believe you never explained to me why you were… that’s why you sink into the bed right after sex.  And all that time I felt like the world’s biggest asshole… nevermind.  Listen to me, Amado.   You knocked everything out of whack when you weren’t there for the ceremony.  Matty had to let Oberon and Puck join together without me, so Demetrius is already waiting for us back at the circle.  They wanted to send the black-and-white spirits out for you but I nixed that.  I was afraid that if you joined with Anton too soon you’d forget what went wrong and you wouldn’t be able to explain it to us.

“ Can you explain it?  Do you know what went wrong, baby?  You’ve never resisted the rejoining ceremony before.  Why is this time different?  Can you tell me?”

“You want to make me disappear,” Angel whispered.  He found tears filling his eyes again, much to his surprise.  He felt strong now, and yet his voice broke.  “I don’t want to disappear.  Please don’t make me join with Anton, master.  You love me .  You want to be with me.  I make you happy.  Why can’t I stay with you?”

“No!  No, that makes no sense , how can you…”

Angel felt the hot tears spilling across his cheeks as Peter pulled away.  He bowed his head, hiding his face under his black curls.  He knew he was in the wrong.  It was his place to serve Peter, not ask things of him.  He knew it wasn’t his place to be afraid or to…

Angel looked up, confused at Peter’s silence.  His master was staring at him now, mouth hanging open, looking startled.  Angel was startled as well, and stared back.

Finally Peter looked away.  He closed his mouth, shook his head hard, and stood up.

Silently he pulled his trousers back into place and fastened his belt.  He found his shoes and put them back on.  Then, after he had tucked his shirt back in, he sat cross legged on the ground in front of Angel, still wading waist-high in the earth.  He reached out and took Angel’s hand and spoke very gently.

“You’re right.  If you come back with me to the ceremony, you will disappear.  You will join with Anton to become Athanásio, and both you and Anton will disappear.”  Peter squeezed Angel’s hand firmly.  “And I never thought about it, before now.  Never thought about how it must make you feel.  But I understand why you’re afraid of it.”

He reached out and offered his other hand, asking for Angel’s other hand.  Angel gave it, lost in confusion at the expression on his master’s face.  How could his master understand fear ?  That was impossible.  Unless…

“...because I’m afraid of it too.  That’s exactly what I’m afraid of.  And it’s scary.  Disappearing.  Angel, it’s fucking terrifying.  It’s the scariest fucking thing I’ve ever done.  Testifying in front of Congress wasn’t as scary as what Shuri and T'Challa want me to do.”

[crimsonbluemoon]

Working For Love: A TerrorMoo Story 11/17

Hey everyone! I’m going out tonight so I’m going to post this earlier than normal. I hope you all enjoy! 

Also, I probably shouldn’t drop this... but I have may be working on a new story for the summer... *wink wink* you’ll have to wait to see! 

Previous Part

Start from the beginning

Brock didn’t like to let go of things. He had a rigid way of thinking, and he didn’t like to change it.

This was especially true for clothes. When he’d been heavier, he never wanted to wear things that clung to tight to his body. The pudge under his arms needed to be covered, jeans were worn a size bigger on purpose, and a sweatshirt was a part of 80% of his outfits. He liked being comfortable in his clothes, which sometimes presented him as ‘frumpy’. On the occasions that he’d feel a little bold, such as anniversaries or parties, Brock might try to wear a piece that had started to collect dust from lack of use. It was never big, just pants that fit snugly over his thighs or a shirt he could feel press against his chest when he moved. His ex never really said anything about the changes, which made him rarely put in the effort. By the end of their relationship, he barely even opened his closet. 

Now, Brock tried not to hide in his closet while staring at the clothes he was wearing. Craig had picked out his outfit earlier when they shopped for something Brock would be able to wear to Tyler’s birthday party. If the two were invited to their gym owner’s party months ago, it would have felt strange. Now, the gym workers were a part of their weird group of friends. Scotty and Marcel got along like a house on fire, and Brock could already see Craig’s wheels turning. Ryan, a more reserved science teacher from Brock’s school, had so far avoided Mini’s cupid skills, trying to push through his shy persona to adapt to the large group. Anthony was quick to shove him under his arm and ‘show him’ things, which Brock monitored closely. But from Luke’s scolding looks at Anthony when the joyous man tried to feed Ryan another shot at their last hang out, it seemed Brock wasn’t the only one looking out for his co-worker. 

Now the whole group was going to celebrate Tyler’s birthday together, and Brock wasn’t sure how to feel about his new look. The brown cardigan was useful in showing how the lean muscles in his arms had started to define themselves. A simple white shirt laid under it, but with how close it was to his body, Brock felt mixed about the choice. It didn’t look bad, because he’d been working on slimming down his stomach, but his hands kept tugging at the shirt. The jeans that he’d somehow managed to slip into (and that part had been really surprising to him) weren’t uncomfortable, but they were tight. It was out of his normal style, falling around his hips rather than over his stomach. He couldn’t pull them up, because that was where they were supposed to fall. And the outfit itself wasn’t bad; Brock was just unsure if he looked good in it. 

“Brock? What’s going on? We need to meet Tyler and Brian in ten minutes at the gym or we’re gonna be late!” Craig’s hand pounded on the door, showing that the little amount of patience his anxious friend had located was well beyond gone. 

“Uh, coming.” Even after he gave the answer, it took Brock two minutes to compose himself and open the door of his room. Craig’s eyes showed his irritation better than his pout, but he seemed distracted when he looked over Brock’s attire with a nod. 

“You look like a completely different person when you wear clothes that actually fit you. I’d pick you up at a bar.”

“My other clothes fit me,” Brock protested, but he knew what Mini was talking about. In the new clothes, Brock couldn’t hide himself in a lumpy sweaters and overwashed shirts. Craig arched an eyebrow at the rebuttal, but his attention was drawn to the cellphone that chirped loudly from his pocket. A quick glance to the screen was all Mini needed before he turned away, looking more than eager to get to the man on the other side of the phone. 

“I can’t wait to see Brian’s jaw hit the floor when he sees you.” 

“He’s seen me outside of the gym before.” 

“But not like this.” Brock wanted to argue it when he moved into Mini’s car, but for the first time in… well, maybe his whole life, Brock hesitated. Because was it really so bad to recognize how far he’d come in his journey? His body was starting to shift in a way he hadn’t seen in years. The physical changes were nice, and since his breakdown in the locker room (it’d been weeks ago, but the residual embarrassment still lingered when he hung out with Brian or Scotty), Brock had actually started to heal. He unfriended his ex, knowing that keeping his social media in his life would only make the wound deeper. He’d managed to go out with his friends more outside of work and fully focus on his gym routine again. Though he wasn’t fully ‘okay’, a word he’d stopped using the moment Brian made it clear he’d be accepted either way, he was getting there. Support from his friends, family, and the gym as a whole was helping him put all the pieces back again. In truth, maybe Craig was right. Maybe he was looking different than he ever had before. 

But thinking Brian would notice it wasn’t something he could believe in just yet.

“He sees me at the gym all the time in less.” The droll stare he got from Craig when they stopped at a light made him fidget in his seat. 

“Okay, I am too anxious and not drunk enough to deal with your self-loathing, Hamlet. You wanna play this game? Then let’s make a bet.” 

“What kind of bet?” He was wary because he’d seen some of Mini’s mischief before, and rarely did it turn out well for the other in the deal. But Craig looked less manic than normal, and Brock wondered if it was because he was focused on making Tyler’s birthday a pleasant experience. It was saddening to hear that the gym owner had never had a birthday event he enjoyed, citing family drama or backstabbing friends from the past as key factors in his displeasure of the holiday. Mini had proclaimed that this time would be ‘different’, with Tyler sneering with enough sass to show how little he believed in that comment. 

“If Brian doesn’t say something about how amazing you look the first sixty seconds we meet up with them, I’ll buy you a drink at dinner. But, if he does, then you gotta buy me one.” Craig’s little bet wasn’t too extreme, as both knew they’d be drinking during the party. And really, he wouldn’t mind a free drink. His eyes glanced to the gym as Mini pulled into the parking lot, head already nodding at the deal. 

“Okay, that sounds fair.” 

“Maybe to my wallet.” Craig’s mutter wasn’t answered by Brock when he stepped from the car, already seeing two figures waiting by the entrance of the gym. It was shut down an hour ago in preparation for the celebration despite Tyler grumbling about losing revenue. His smile was quick to pop over his face when catching Brian’s gaze, waving in hope of hiding the nervous energy flooding his fingertips. He took the bet thinking he’d win, but the smallest part of his hoped that somehow-

“Holy shit.” 

“Huh?” Brock stopped at the quiet words that spilled from Brian’s mouth, unsure how to take the way his eyes travelled down Brock’s body. Craig had done a similar tactic earlier, but having Brian be the one to look him over made his ears flush and his breath catch. Brain cells refused to function, leaving him helpless to break the silence that had settled after the swear. When blue caught his stare again, his heart somersaulted through his chest, landing perfectly in the bottom of his stomach. Brock felt good about himself, but Brian was a trainer; obviously he’d seen people of all shapes and sizes. He was meant to spot people’s needs for fitness. There was no guarantee that his eyes weren’t picking up the stubborn pinch of fat on Brock’s hip or the chubby cheeks that always looked bigger when flushed. Or what if he caught something else that had nothing to do with weight? What if Brock’s eyes were too close together or his nose had a weird round tilt that could- 

“You look amazing.” There was a caress in the compliment that weaved along Brock’s spine like a touch, warm and full of care with each additional word. “This is a really good look on you. Brings out your eyes and- wow. Yeah, really knocking it out of the park with this, Brocky.”

“Oh, um, thank you. You too, uh...” His fingers tugged at the edge of his sleeve when tugging it over his knuckles, unsure how he was supposed to take so much praise without melting into the concerte. His brain was soaked in endorphins to the point that he couldn’t point out how the navy coloring of Brian’s shirt made his eyes burst with color. He wanted to return the compliments, to admit that the black jeans made his frame look perfect, yet the words dried up in his mouth before he could open it. He hoped his smile would give away some of his thoughts, and from the easy grin Brian gave back when hooking his thumbs into his belt loops, it had. The motion framed his hands along the inside of his thighs, and Brock’s mind dived too far south not to duck his head and mentally curse. 

“Yeah, so I’m going to count this eye fucking as a win.” Craig’s voice made Brock’s heels pop off the ground in fright, glancing over to his friend’s smirk. He was smug elbowing Tyler, who looked a mixture of annoyed and pleased at the close proximity. “Brock owes me a drink now. Thought Brian wouldn’t think he was hot.” 

“Brian thinks he’s hot when he smells like shit and looks like a firetruck dipped in a bloody mary. For a smart guy, your friend’s fucking stupid.” Tyler’s grumble was sharp, but didn’t match the softer motion of his arm when Mini burrowed underneath it to press to his side. The fact that he didn’t push Craig away was surprising, his large hand even finding a home on the shorter man’s shoulder. “Now lets get this shit over with so I can get away from you weirdos.” 

Tyler really was a weird enigma.

“Right, on to the party for my free drink!” Mini’s cheer was loud in the empty parking lot when leading Tyler to the car, and Brock shook his head at their weird combo until a familiar tone cleared his throat next to Brock.

“You ready to go?” Brian’s hand was offered without expectation, and his face gave none of his intentions behind the sign of affection away. Brock’s fingers moved nervously by his side and he glanced down at the palm, knowing any chance of hiding how gone he was for Brian would be lost with his trembling fingers. Even with his past relationships, he wasn’t a big hand holder, knowing his sweaty palms and twitches could be annoying to those he dated. He bit his lip when weighing his options, glancing up to Brian and stopping at the sight. The nervous flicker of hope that peeked out from behind his eyes was small, but still visible for someone looking for him. Someone who was feeling the same way. 

“Yeah.” Brock grabbed his hand slowly, noticing how easily his fingers parted to slip between Brian’s. The touch made goosebumps rise on Brock’s arms, and he was grateful the cardigan would hide the reaction from Brian’s watchful gaze. He gave Brian’s palm a soft squeeze, not pulling away when the other laughed and gently guided them toward the car.   

Brock liked his old habits, but he liked Brian’s palm against his so much more.

Brock needs all of the love! And good thing hes got Mini and Brian, eh? So as always, like, reblog, and let me know what you think! <3 

[daphner20]

Aaron Roberts

Prologue It’s 2:45 pm sighed Aaron, there was a staff meeting for everyone in the Ballroom at 4pm. The rumors were swinging like a pendulum: we were being sold; we were having mass layoffs, we are closing our doors, and it went on and on. As Aaron, looked out of his office window, which overlooked one of the most beautiful beaches in the world ( don’t take his word, it is ranked in the top five of every Tourist/Travel magazine), he took a short walk down memory lane. He has been with The Kingdom, for the last 10 years, and he has no regrets. By the time he was 22, he had a bachelor’s in Accounting, A Master in Accounting, and a MBA. He had also sat the CPA exams and pass all sections on his first attempt. He worked at, CPDG, one of the largest accounting firms in the world, for 3 years, and he hated every minute of it. His salvation came, when his frat brother, told him about The Kingdom, the name alone piqued his interest. And 10 years later at 35, I was the youngest CFO at a major hotel resort. Yeah!!

The chime of his alarm, brought him back to reality, it’s 3:40. Time to make his way to the Ballroom. It will only take 10 minutes, but Aaron was a stickler for time. 'Good afternoon, every one, thank you for coming, said Mr Keith O’brien, (General Manager). First let me address the rumors, there will be no layoffs and we  are not selling the hotel. I will retire at the end of the month. I will stay on for an additional 2 months so that there will be a smooth transition. So without further delay, the next General Manager of The Kingdom is Mr. Aaron Roberts. What the #$&%?

Chapter 1 It’s has been 3 months now, since that incredulous announcement was made. I didn’t expect it. To be honest that promotion was the last thing on my mind. I think I ambitious as the next person. But to be appointed as General  Manager/CFO is a feat. Yes I retain my position as Chief Financial Officer as well. The Kingdom is a 700 room 5 star hotel, on an island in The Bahamas. With a staff compliment of 2000. We all live on the island. We are the sole employer as well. So my responsibility, is not limited only to the hotel, but the entire island. From the airport, staff quarters, beaches, etc. Not bad for that skinny, shy altar boy Yeah!! My family were so elated, when they heard the news, I think my mom is still crying, and my priest Father John Cooper, (who was also my math teacher in high school) and the entire parish family is still sending congratulations. Am I proud of myself? I think I am thankful and grateful to God. I remembered as a child in CCD, Sister Marva, constantly said, all good and perfect gifts comes from heaven above. Am I overwhelmed? No, I have a great team. We have nearly 100 % occupancy year round. But there is a feeling I can’t put my finger on I Am Lost!!! Chapter 2 I am the way, the truth and life, no one comes to the Father except through me. What does that mean, wondered Aaron. He keeps hearing it in his heart, whether awake or sleeping, those words are there. On top of that he felt lost. I don’t lost is the right word. I have a good job, a great family, am in excellent health, am single (I see it as a plus, so I can focus on my career). What more is there? I was about to find out. A few weeks later, during an executive meeting, the Director of Sales,  Shelby Robinson, said “that we have a group, that wants to book our entire hotel all 700 and meeting rooms for one week”.  Wow, everyone exclaimed, awesome. We’ve had groups before, but never on the scale. It was a religious group. It was a Pastor of a mega church in New York, a membership of 50,000 . It is considered an evangelical non-denominational Christian Church. I don’t know what that means. I was born and raised Catholic. My parents are Catholic, I was an altar boy, from the age of 8 – 18. I attended only Catholic schools and universities. We are the true Christian Church. Yeah!! Chapter 3 The hotel is a frenzy, in good way. After months of negotiating, the day of the big arrival had come. The negotiating had been relentless, they had so many demands. We’re used to that. But they had some non-negotiable items. No alcohol, no secular music, limit Internet access (block all ungodly sights). The list was exhausting!! After calculations, the revenue which was in the millions it was worth it. We will be in the black for years. Every meeting space and restaurant will be utilized. This was considered a conference for men. There were bishops, deacons, men's ministry and lay members. We had a total of 5,000 men descending on The Kingdom, it felt like another Kingdom was invading The Kingdom! On my career side my life was awesome, we were able to negotiate a deal of a life time. However, in my personal life. It was the tale of two cities. Some days I am overwhelmed by this emptiness, that I am feeling, that I can’t sleep or eat! Thank God, I have been able to conceal it with work, nobody seems to be the wiser. I have taken praying the Rosary even more. ( My mother will considered that a dream come true). What is “ I am the way the truth and the life, no one comes to the Father, except through me.” Lord, I cried out “ if you are real, what does this mean.” Help me please!! Mr. Roberts, they are here! Chapter 4 It is not a custom for the General Manager to meet hotel guests, but this was an exception and necessary. Arriving first Apostle Dylan Freeman, he was the Senior Pastor of Greater Cathedral of Brooklyn, New York. He looked like any ordinary man, I think because he had such a large congregation, that he would look ‘holy’. That’s just the Catholic  in me talking.  I have never meet a modern day Apostle before. The ones that I knew of , were Jesus disciples in the bible. “It is a pleasure to welcome you Apostle Freeman, to The Kingdom,” said Aaron. “I have come to The Kingdom, for such a time as this,” replied Apostle Freeman. His entourage laughed heartly . I didn’t get it, maybe it was Christian lingo or some inside joke. I escorted him to his suite which is on the 69th Floor. The Kingdom has 70 floors. The 70th Floor is our major Ballroom, which is called  ‘The Great Hall.’  This is where there will be a welcome cocktail reception. ( Minus the cocktails) at 7pm. I hate  cocktail receptions, but duty calls. It’s 6:30 pm. Most of the guests are here, taking in the breath taking view of the island. The Great Hall, has a panaramic view of the entire island. So, there were a lot of selfies. Apostle Freeman, arrived precisely at 7pm. My goal was to make light chit chat, then make my escape. Finally, he was alone, I eventually got to him, before I had a chance to say a word, he said “ I have a word for you.” “ You want a word with me? “ I asked. He looked at me, and just starting laughing. What was so funny I thought. He must have read my mind. Because he stopped abruptly. ‘ Forgive me, we pastor's believe everyone understands what we are saying, he said apologetically. “ I have a word for you, from the Lord,” he said somberly. I felt like I just got suckered punch, my insides felt like jelly. I didn’t know to say. I thought I was speechless for hours. But he graciously said to me, “ Don’t worry, everything you have been experiencing these last several months, will be made clear to you. And just like that he was throng again, by the other guests. For the next several days, I was eager to have an audience with the Apostle, but with his schedule,  I know that was impossible. It was the last day, I knew that it will be hectic, so my daily morning jog on the beach was imperative. As I was about to begin, Apostle Freeman suddenly appeared. “I am the way, the truth and the life, no one comes to the father, except through me”, he said to me. “ Do you know what that means? I just shake my head weakly, saying no. Thus says the Lord, this emptiness you are feeling, it is your soul yearning for the one true God. And you can only have that with Jesus as your Savior. “Do you want to make Jesus Christ you personal Savior?” asked Apostle “Yes, “ I was openly crying now. Repeat after me: Lord Jesus, I know that I am a sinner, and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe You died for my sins and rose from the dead. I turn from my sins and invite You to come into my heart and life. I confess You as my personal  Lord and Savior. In Jesus name I pray Amen. As I prayed those word, the Peace of God flooded my soul, and the emptiness vanished. Thank you Jesus. As I looked on that beautiful water, I knew what I wanted more than anything. “Will you baptize me, Apostle”, I asked. As Apostle Freeman, baptize me in the Name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, I knew that I was truly alive and Jesus had given me a new life. Later that morning, while I was escorting Apostle to his car. He said this, “ I have two things to things to say to you. “ Jesus loves you and see you next year. Yeah!! THE END

[thechildoflightning]

The Kübler-Ross Model

Title: The Kübler-Ross Model [Masterpost]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairings: background LAMP

~~~

Chapter Title: Acceptance- Chapter Five

Summary: 

Stage Five: Acceptance- Characterized by coming to terms with the loss and understand how deeply impacting it was, allowing the space to rebuild and move forward.

In which Remy is finally moving forward.

Warnings: Panic Attacks, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms (mentioned), Unhealthy Family Relationships, Food Mention, PTSD, Cults

[ao3 link]

Acceptance- Chapter Five

“Selected: Voicemail. One item. Tab one of one,” Remy’s phone says calmly. It’s from her dad. She puts her finger to the screen, sliding it around as she searches for the desired section.

“Voicemail.”

One finger down.

“Daniel Zurko. M-”

Double tap.

“Okay. Okay. You win. I’ll stop calling. I thought about cancelling your phone but… Your college fund is still yours. Your phone’s still yours. Everything I pay for is still yours. Most of that is already set up so we don’t- we don’t have to talk. I get it, you don’t want to. That’s okay. I- I’ll admit I’m not happy about it. I don’t- I don’t know how we fell apart Remy. But I- that’s in the past. If you want to change meal plans or need me to pay vet bills for Cha-Cha or- or- whatever, just let me know. I get you don’t want to call. And that’s your choice. I- You can say no. But you are- you are going to have to communicate at least a little bit if you want me to pay for those things. But we don’t have to talk. Your choice either way.”

-

“Remy?” a voice picks up, and Remy almost cries in relief, “Remy, why are you calling at… 4:26 in the morning?”

Remy shudders and tries to take a deep breath, failing halfway through with a wheeze. 

“Remy?”

“Virgil,” Remy chokes out. And then again, “Virgil.”

“Hey. Hey. I don't know what’s going on Remy, but it’s going to be okay, alright? We’re going to get through this, it’s okay. Are you safe?”

“Yeah,” she wheezes out, because she’s drowning but only metaphorically, “yeah I’m,” she wheezes, “I-” When has breathing ever been this hard? “I can’t, I can’t breathe,” she pants. 

“Okay. Hey that’s okay,” Virgil responds, “Do you know why you can’t breathe?”

“I- no.”

“Okay,” Virgil says. He keeps saying that Remy realizes. Keeps saying ‘okay’ that things are going to be ‘okay.’ How is anything ‘okay?’

“Virgil?” Remy asks, because she doesn’t know what else to say. She’s not sure she has the air to say any more.

“Yeah,” Virgil replies, “Okay Rem can you follow my lead? I’m going to ask you to take a deep breath in for four seconds. You’re then going to hold it for four. Then breathe out for four. And repeat. Got it?”

“Virgil.”

She’s  desperate now. She’s not really what for. Air probably. She can’t breathe.

“Okay. We’re going to start. Got it? In. 1, 2, 3, 4. Hold. 1-”

Remy’s trying to follow it. She breathes in with Virgil but as she holds her breath falters and stutters and then she’s wheezing again, breath coming in big gulping gasps and she still can’t get enough of it.

She can’t do this. 

“I c- I can’t,” she gets out between gasps. 

“Yes you can Remy. I know it’s hard. But you can. We’re going to try again. Got it?”

Remy wants to scream at Virgil. Doesn’t Virgil get it? There’s no way she can do this. It’s impossible. She can’t breathe. 

“Remy. In.”

Remy listens. She sucks in a breathe. 

“1, 2, 3, 4. Hold. 1, 2, 3-”

Once again, she doesn’t make it, breath wheezing out too quickly as she continues to try and take desperate gulps of air. 

“Remy,” Virgil’s insisting again, before she even has time to spiral, “Again. In.”

Remy breathes in. 

“Hold.”

She holds. She makes it four seconds. 

“Out.”

She breathes out for the full four. 

Vigil runs her through the exercise a few times, waiting until her breathing is more steady. Eventually when her breathing is deep and even, he switches to counts of 4, 7, 8 instead of 4, 4, 4. Remy recognizes the new pattern. She’s seen Virgil run through it plenty of times. 

She’s seen Virgil run through this exercise.

Holy shit is that what this was? Did Remy just have a panic attack? Virgil had a lot of those. Flashbacks too. God how did he deal with that, that was awful. 

“Virgil. Did I- was that a panic attack?” she asks, because she still isn’t quite sure. She isn’t sure she wants to know either.

“Yeah,” he answers, “Yeah it was. Never had one before?”

“No.”

“Yeah. I- can I- do you know why you had it?”

It was time to share, wasn’t it? 

“I miss my dad,” Remy admits. There’s so much more than that. But Remy doesn’t quite know how to say it, how to start. She falters. “I- Virgil, l-” she bursts into tears, starting and not stopping. Cha-Cha whines and licks at her tears. 

Remy doesn’t hear Kai, so she hopes they’re still asleep. She really doesn’t want to involve them in this whole mess. 

Her tears continue to fall. 

“Hey, Remy can I come over?” Virgil says. 

“Yes,” Remy says, because she’s drowning and she doesn’t know what to do but she knows she wants Virgil here with her. “Yes. Please.”

“Okay,” Virgil says, “I’m on my way, I’ll be there soon. You’re going to have to let me in, yeah? Meet me at the entrance?”

“Okay,” Remy says. 

“Okay. I’m going to hang up now. Are you going to be okay for a few minutes?”

“Yeah,” Remy gets out, “Yeah I will be.”

“Okay. I love you Rem.”

Remy doesn’t get a chance to respond before Virgil hangs up. 

She takes a minute to wipe away her current tears and slow down the ones still falling. She finally gets them to stop and breathes out a sigh of relief. 

Virgil’s apartment is very close to campus and calming down took a bit, so she gets up to be at the door when he gets here. She shoves her sunglasses on- for protection, albeit a different type than usual- and grabs her cane. She lets Cha-Cha slip out next to her, even as she doesn’t bother putting her in her harness or leash. Remy trusts her to stay at her side, and she seems worried about her, so whatever, she can come. 

Remy creeps down the hall and downstairs. She enters the main room and finds a chair, waiting for Virgil to show.

She feels exposed. She’s not sure if there’s anyone in the room with her, and it makes her uncomfortable to be unsure. She normally wouldn’t care but she knows that she must look like a mess. Not to mention how early it is. She taps her foot on the ground in a repeated pattern.

Her phone eventually buzzes with a text from Virgil and she goes to the door to let him in. 

“Hey,” he says once he enters the main room. 

Remy gives a small nod in return. Virgil lets out a heavy sigh. 

“Can I give you a hug?” he asks. 

Remy shrugs and then nods. 

Virgil scoops her up, pulls her close. Remy’s taller than him by a fair bit, but she can’t help but feel protected in his arms. She almost starts crying again. She rubs pathetically at her eyes. 

“We finally going to talk?” Virgil asks. 

She nods once more. 

“Okay. Good. Do you want to stay here, go to your room, or somewhere else?”

Remy swallows, considers. She doesn’t want to wake Kai, but she really doesn’t want people to see her falling apart like this. It’s too personal, too vulnerable. 

“Do you have a preference?” she asks instead. 

“Not too much,” Virgil answers, “I’d prefer that if we do go somewhere, we don’t stay outside and instead go to a physical location.”

A physical location will have people. Remy doesn’t want that. But she can also fully understand Virgil’s preference to not be outside alone at night. 

“Are there people in here?” Remy asks. 

“A few, yeah,” Virgil answers, “There’s someone on a computer in the corner by the long table. There’s two people studying together in the corner by the hall near the stairs.”

Remy nods, considers her options. She doesn’t want to wake Kai. But she’d rather risk that then have complete strangers watch her fall apart. 

“Okay. Let’s go to my dorm.”

“Okay,” Virgil agrees, and lets her take the lead. 

They make it to her dorm, Remy twisting the door open and allowing Virgil, Trixie, and then Cha-Cha to slip past her. Her dorm is really too small for three people and two large dogs, but it’ll have to do.

“I like the rainbow lights,” Virgil comments.

Remy chuckles. They were a pretty great addition to the room. It had also been one of the first things Kai and Remy did together as they became friends. The memory sits fondly in her mind.

“Yeah. They’re fun,” she remarks. Then pauses, because the main lights in the room are off. “You can see them? Are they on?”

“No they’re off, there’s just enough light from outside.”

Remy shrugs, because hell if she knows what people can and can’t see in the dark.

She sits on her bed. Virgil joins her. Trixie sticks close to his side, watching him attentively.

“So,” Virgil drawls, “You miss your dad?”

Remy nods, ashamed, and pulls her knees up tight to her chest. She feels like a little kid like this. She thinks she might cry again.

“Yeah,” she croaks, “I miss him and I don’t want to miss him. He was- I mean he loved me I know he did. And he wasn’t- I mean he wasn’t all bad? He really did care about me. But he was restrictive. He held me back, didn’t let me figure things out for myself. He micromanaged my entire life and took so many choices away from me. Virgil- Virgil he took Cha-Cha away. He took my service dog away Virgil. My dad,” Remy takes a deep breath as the memory comes flooding back. And once that first memory hits, so many more come with it. Her tone turns urgent. 

“He’s- He used to lock me in my room sometimes too?” Remy admits, “When he- When I started to get frustrated that he’d never let me go outside by myself? Even after I had done all the lessons, after I had gotten good with a cane and then gotten good with Cha-Cha. God- he only let me start going places after I climbed out my window once. I don’t think I ever told you that?”

Remy knows she hasn’t told Virgil that. She hasn’t told anybody this story- half forgot it herself. But now, it all comes rushing back with vengeance. 

“It was before we met,” Remy explains, “I was kind of an idiot. I tried to climb out my window on the second story of my house thinking that was a smart idea. I ended up falling- broke my arm. But I just- I couldn’t just stay at home. I couldn’t- I was suffocating and I needed to get out and Virgil I did, I finally did.”

The pain had been awful and the recovery time a bitch and as it healed his arm always itched under the cast but Remy could never find the time to be angry with herself because those brief moments of freedom were worth it. 

It had to all come crashing down eventually.

“But this all sucks because I love him and I miss him and he’s my dad. And I know- I know he wanted the best for me. I know he loved me. He never- He never tried to hurt me. But he did. And I couldn’t take it anymore.”

Virgil just listens throughout Remy’s ramblings, giving small remarks of reassurance as she speaks.

“I miss him,” Remy cries, “I miss him and I hate that I do.”

She tips over collapses into Virgil’s side, burying her head in his shoulder as he gras her tight and doesn’t let go. He whispers soft reassurances in her ear, saying that he was there, that it would be okay, that it would be alright.

Remy sniffles a few more times and rubs at her eyes. She takes her sunglasses off and places them next to her on the bed.

“I have a few thoughts,” Virgil eventually says, voice careful and even, “Do you want to hear them or do you just need me to listen?”

“No- go ahead,” Remy says.

Virgil’s good at this stuff. It’s why Remy called him. Hopefully he’ll have some miraculous wisdom for her and everything will be fixed. Even so, Remy can’t help acknowledge how unlikely that is. There isn’t an easy fix to this issue.

“Okay Remy, I’m going to tell you something and it’s- It’s probably not something you’ve heard before but I’m going to need you to listen, okay.”

Remy mentally sets herself up, and gives a firm nod, ready for whatever enlightening advice to get over his father Virgil has.

“You’re allowed to miss him.”

Wait, what?

“You’re allowed to miss your dad. It’s not a bad thing you do- in fact it makes a lot of sense. Like you said, he did love you even if he made mistakes and hurt you. You were raised by him. It’s okay to miss him- hell it’s okay to still love him. And Remy- here’s the thing. The big thing. You can miss him, you can love him, and you can still hate him, and be mad at him, and you can still hurt. You can want nothing to do with him ever again and still miss him every goddamn day- do you hear me?”

Remy’s brain fumbles to keep up. This is not what she was expecting Virgil to say. She was expecting some genius advice about how to get over missing her dad, not that it’s okay to still miss him. 

“I- what?”

“You can miss him. You can miss him and that doesn’t have to excuse the thing he did. Every feeling you have surrounding him, the good, the bad, the in between. All of that is okay Remy. Anything and everything you’re feeling is okay, it’s valid. Alright?”

“But I- I just- I thought you were going to tell me how to stop missing him?”

Virgil sighs.

“I’m not sure I can do that,” he admits, “I’m not sure you ever will. I think a lot of that comes with time. I- I-” Virgil takes a breath. “Trixie, cover,” he commands. Trixie jumps up, placing her front legs down on Virgil’s lap and setting her head down on him to ground him, “I still miss people from my past,” he admits, “And it’s different- it’s not the same at all. But it’s- I guess my point is that it’s okay to miss people. It’s okay to miss bad people. It’s okay to miss complicated people. It’s- those people might not be healthy for you and you shouldn’t justify the things you did, but your feeling surrounding them are valid, and it’s okay if you miss them.”

“I don’t want to miss him,” Remy admits, “I just want to- to move on with my life and forget about it.”

Virgil hesitates.

“I think part of that is- Okay well first off, that’s completely valid. It’s understandable for you to want to move on and away. And I think there’s parts of that would be good for you. But Remy- this repression thing you’re doing? It’s not going to work.”

“‘M not repressing,” Remy protests, “I’m moving on.”

Virgil waits.

“Yeah I didn’t believe that either,” Remy admits.

“At least you're admitting it, that’s the first step to acceptance,” Virgil says.

Acceptance. What a weird concept. What exactly is Remy supposed to accept?

She voices that exact question.

“Reality,” Virgil is quick to answer, “Your  reality, that’s what you need to accept. And like- Remy I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. Reality acceptance is in all honesty one of the hardest things I’ve personally worked on. It isn’t easy. But it’s worth it. It’s- you learn that sometimes it’s not about moving on, but forward, and after that things sorta start to fall into place.”

Remy considers that for a moment. It leaves a sour taste in her mouth.

“How do I do that?” she asks.

Virgil sighs.

“I- That’s a good question,” he chuckles lightly and falls back on her bed, “I have a few worksheet thingies in a binder somewhere if I can find them. I can type those up and send them to you if you want. And then- I mean- reach out to people? You have us. You have me, you have Logan, you have some good friends it seems like. And I know you don’t know them as well, but I’m positive Pat and Ro would be willing to talk if you wanted to.”

Remy nods and thinks. She sighs and falls back onto the bed with Virgil.

“You could also see a therapist,” Virgil suggests.

Remy listens.

“There’s a lot of resources here on campus and I can walk you through that if you want. I personally don’t really know the exact therapy stuff they have because I needed trauma counselling I knew the school wouldn’t be able to provide. So I dunno if it’d be something you’re interested in or even something that helps. But it's an option. You have options,” Virgil explains.

“Okay,” Remy says. “Okay.”

She thinks this time she’s telling the truth.

“I- can I think about it?” she asks, because she isn’t really sure about therapy yet and all of this is a lot to consider.

“Yes,” Virgil agrees, “Yes absolutely.”

“Okay.”

She’s exhausted. But this time instead of a depressive haze, it feels like she just ran a marathon. It’s a good exhaustion. She feels like she’s getting somewhere.

“Thanks Virgil.” 

“Yeah. No problem.”

They fall asleep like that, sprawled awkwardly on Remy’s tiny bed.

-

Remy wakes up to a confused sounding, “Hello?”

“Who the eff are you talking to gurl?” Remy asks with a yawn. She opens her eyes and Kai’s sitting on their bed, backlit by the windows bright morning light.

“The new dog that randomly appeared in our dorm? Last I checked there was only one,” Kai responds.

Right. Last night was a thing. 

Her eyes sting a bit. They dry out quickly to begin with and the crying last night definitely did not help. She roots through the drawer next to her bed to find the bottle of eyedrops. It only takes a minute to locate. She leans her head back, let’s the drops splash in as she answers Kai’s question.

“That’s Trixie, she bugging you?” she asks as she blinks rapidly. The liquid settles.

“Well she woke me up with kisses so I wouldn’t say she’s bugging me, but I mean bit of a surprise.”

“Trixie, come,” Remy calls.

Trixie walks over, collar jingling. Remy gets her to sit and gives her a few pets before letting her be.

“Sorry, she’s probably just hungry. I think Virgil feeds her earlier than I feed Cha-Cha.”

“So you just explained absolutely nothing. And who’s Virgil?”

“I’m Virgil.”

Remy jumps at the noise as Virgil sits up next to her, also yawning.

“Jesus, way to scare a guy,” Kai says. Remy privately agrees.

“Trix,” Virgil calls, and Remy realizes that Virgil’s shaking slightly. Trixie obeys, going over to Virgil. “Cover,” he commands, and she jumps up onto the bed and settles on top of him to do DPT. 

“You alright?” Remy asks.

“Yeah. I just- I didn’t know where I was.”

Remy nods, offers her hand. Virgil squeezes it and takes a deep breath before letting go.

“Well, Virgil this is Kai, Kai this is Virgil. You’re both absolute assholes who are insistent on caring about me, so I think you’ll get along well.”

“Nice to meet you,” Kai greets, “I use he/they pronouns. They/them right now. Your dog has better breath than Cha-Cha, so props to you.”

Virgil laughs and Remy jumps to defend Cha-Cha (even though Kai does have a point).

“Yeah sorry, she usually eats earlier. Oh and he/him for me.”

“It’s good- I needed to get up anyways,” Kai replies. They stand and stretch. “And honestly, a dog sounds about a billion times better than an alarm clock.”

“It’s nice until the weekends,” Remy grumbles, “And then I want to sleep in and Cha-Cha’s trying to wake me up at 7 for food.”

“See this is the advantage of getting boyfriends. I can get Roman to feed her when he gets up to pray.”

“Gotta get me one of those,” Remy agrees. She wipes a hand over her face, still feeling exhausted. “Ugh. What time is it? And can someone turn the sun off? It’s too bright.”

“Yup lemme just go turn an actual star off,” Kai says the same time as Virgil says, “bit before 7.”

Remy wants to go back to sleep. It’s so early. But she also has an 8 am today. Fuck school.

“Ugh,” she whines again, and clamors out of her bed, “I hate 8 ams.”

Virgil laughs at her, the jerk.

“Get used to it.”

“Okay- well I’m headed to the dining hall for breakfast,” Kai jumps in. “Rem you joining me?”

“Yeah sure,” she yawns. “Virgil, wanna come with?”

“Sure,” he agrees, and a new day begins

-

Logan meets her outside her dorm building.

“Hey,” he says, just as she exits.

“Hi,” she says in return, expecting him.

They walk to lunch together.

Logan doesn’t bring up any topics of importance. In fact, he doesn’t talk much at all, just responds to whatever Remy’s saying. She’s not surprised. She was the one who texted him saying they needed to talk after all.

“I’m sorry I haven’t really been talking to you lately,” she says.

Logan takes the words and accepts them.

“I-” she hesitates. She’s done this once now, it should be easy to do it again. “I miss my dad.” It isn’t easy at all, but this time it may be slightly easier than before. Maybe it'll keep getting easier. She hopes.

If it doesn’t get easier that would suck. But she’ll have to learn to manage, because this is something she needs to talk about.

“Oh,” Logan says. “Oh okay.”

She nods.

They talk.

Remy shares everything.

Logan understands and he’s sweet and he’s caring and- unlike her father- Logan listens to her. He listens to her and Remy feels heard.

She’s not so sure what was so hard about this in the first place.

“I’m still not quite sure why you didn’t just tell me in the first place,” Logan admits. Remy can’t help but agree.

“It was… hard,” she comes to it, “It was hard. It was hard to admit that I missed someone that hurt me. Someone who I’m likely going to have no to minimal contact with for the rest of my life. That was hard to accept. I’m still struggling to accept it.”

“Okay,” Logan says, and he doesn’t say that he understands or gets what she’s going through because he doesn’t get it, not quite. But he says okay, and he listens, and Remy thinks it might finally be okay. She’s going to be okay.

“Oh,” she says. She picks at her food, because this is a big decision, “Oh and I’m transgender. I’m still going by Remy but I’m using she/her pronouns and feminine language now.”

“Oh. So that’s what you talked to Patton about,” comes Logan’s immediate response. It’s such a Logan thing to say. Remy’s missed it, missed him. She smiles and this time it doesn’t feel so fake.

They talk for a bit longer. Logan offers the support he’s able to. Remy says she’ll reach out more. She mentions that Virgil brought up therapy, says she might look into that. Logan supports her. She doesn’t need his support, but it’s nice to have anyway.

Maybe she doesn’t need a lot of things, but she thinks that some of her wants might be just as important.

They finish lunch.

Remy moves forward.

-

Cha-Cha is trying to find Elliot. The weather's shit today and Remy doesn’t want to go outside, but Cha-Cha needs attention and exercise so Kai, Remy, and Elliot started playing hide-and-seek with her down in the main room right where you enter the dorm building. 

No one seems to mind them much. In fact, many people seemed to enjoy the distraction from the dreary weather outside, and now there’s a whole group playing.

Remy always gets out first. Cha-Cha intentionally seeks her handler out before anyone else. She’ll zoom past everyone else just to find Remy’s hiding spot. Remy thinks it would be frustrating if it wasn’t so adorable. She has such a good dog.

“Cha-Cha’s too good at this,” Elliot sighs, and falls onto the seat on the couch next to Kai and her.

Remy and Kai murmur agreements.

Remy thinks, and decides now is as good of a time as any.

“Hey,” she says, “Sorry I haven’t really been uh… reaching out lately.” She’s not sure if those are the right words to describe what she’s been doing. But she doesn’t have better ones. She hopes Kai and Elliot understand.

“Oh so you’re finally going to talk to us?” Kai bites back. He’s caring but there’s a certain bitterness in his tone.

“Kai,” Elliot admonishes.

Kai sighs, shifts.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Remy says, “I know I haven’t really been great at talking.”

She pauses, they wait.

“I- uh well I don’t really- Me and my dad haven’t-”  She sighs, swallows her fear, and let’s herself admit the truth, “I sorta came to college this year without my dad’s support. He doesn’t think it’s something I’m capable of. We’re not really on the best of terms right now. But it’s hard, because he’s my dad, y’know?”

“Yeah,” Elliot says, “Yeah Remy, I do know.”

Remy shuts her eyes for a moment, suddenly overwhelmed with emotion. Elliot hasn’t talked a lot about their family, but they have said a bit about how they’ve always sort of been an outsider. They’ve explained that their parents have meant well, but never quite hit the mark. They haven’t gone into details, and they certainly haven’t said much, and they don’t need to.

“Family can be hard,” Kai adds, “And I- I get the doubt in your capabilities, especially when you’re already facing limitations.”

Remy’s throat constricts; she doesn’t think it’s possible to feel anymore than she does. Kai understands in a way that most people don’t. Remy knows she has limits, some things she’s never going to be able to do. That’s a fact of life. Kai has those too, Kai gets what it’s like to have people want to make decisions for you; those people who mean well, but also don’t listen. Kai knows what it’s like to live in an inherently ableist world, and like Remy, has learned how to adapt.

Remy realizes her friends might understand much more than she gives them credit for.

It’s relieving, to have that support.

“Yeah,” Remy admits. She breathes in, and accepts. It’s going to be okay. She’s okay.

There’s a lot she has to work through still. There’s still the tang of bitterness that comes with missing her dad. She still hasn’t told Virgil about being trans. She’s probably going to have to call her dad to get some of her school finances figured out. Things aren’t immediately fixed. 

But things are finally on the right track. Remy finally has control back, has a plan. 

She’s going to be okay. She’s going to be okay. She’s going to be okay.

Remy repeats that like a mantra, allows it to carry her through even when the stress of everything around her rises.

She’s going to be okay.

Cha-Cha comes over, whines and nudges her. Remy’s lips quirk up into a smile.

They go back to playing hide-and-seek. 

~

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[godzillagirl-14]

Wish Upon an Idol (Ch. 3)

Chapter 3

Pairing: ot7 x reader

Summary: The Bangtan boys have the ability to grant wishes (unbeknownst to you, the brand new addition to their friend group) So when you jokingly wish you had superpowers to “help the world in a way you knew how” what happens when you wake up the next day with extraordinary abilities? 

Warnings: Drama, Angst, a lot of Action, smut (later on), and a bad attempt at being humorous 

Warning for this chapter: Reader’s boss is a gross pervert.

Word Count: 2,903 

Taglist: @mischiefmakerliesmith5 @snowythellama (if you want to be tagged, just let me know) :) 

“.... Wait,” Out of every scenario he had prepared for in his head, Namjoon certainly wasn’t expecting you to just up and say how it was ‘cool’. “That’s it? No freaking out? No yelling at how you don’t believe us? Just ‘cool’?” To say they were astonished was an understatement. 

“Yeah it’s cool! I mean you guys were just ordinary men and then out of nowhere you get thrust into a life where you can make people’s lives better just because of a simple good deed? That’s incredible!” you were practically bouncing in your seat, the way your beautiful (e/c) eyes sparkled in admiration distracting them for longer than they’d care to admit. 

“So, you’re just going to believe that we gave you powers?” Jimin asked, eyeing you cautiously as you met his gaze. You raised an eyebrow at him, “I woke up to my bed being on fire. If this were some sort of elaborate prank, I would have already killed six out of seven of you.” 

Visibly gulping as they had witnessed firsthand how brutal you can get when you are angry, they didn’t want to have a repeat event: An incident regarding a Halloween prank in which the boys thought it were a good idea to ambush you while wearing Jason Voorhees masks. Items were thrown and shrill screams filled the room. Once you figured out it was just your friends, they all shared a collection of bruises and angry death glares for weeks to come.  

“Now that I think about it,” Yoongi leaned forward, elbows rested on his knees as he observed you. “How could you have possibly gotten your body temperature high enough to start a fire in your own bed?” 

You were really hoping they wouldn’t ask you this question as you remembered the intense dream of a certain group of men who loomed over you as you sat naked and submissive. Whispered breaths, lingering kisses, scorching touches. Constant praises echoed in your ear about how much of a good girl you were as you choked around Namjoon’s cock while Hoseok fingered you from behind, the rest of the boys watching intently as you fell apart. Anyone would spontaneously combust after a dream like that! 

You nervously scratched the back of your neck again, feeling the heat trace its way from your ears to your cheeks, and you were surprised you didn’t burst into flames again. Avoiding their gazes, you prayed to all the higher being that the boys around you couldn’t feel the heat radiating off of you. “Well, I- uh, I.” you fumbled over your words, wracking your brain for an explanation so you wouldn’t have to explain the fact you had a wet dream about them. 

“I-I was dreaming that - uh, I was dreaming that I. . . was abducted by aliens. . . and then they just, ya know, tossed me into the sun,” Even you didn’t believe your story and by the telling of their shit eating grins, they didn’t believe you either. The elders of the group decided to spare you and not coddle you anymore, but you weren’t so lucky with the maknaes. 

“Oooh, did our little (Y/n) have a dirty dream about someone?” There was a teasing lilt to Taehyung’s voice, but it barely masked the jealous undertones, that you obviously didn’t pick up on. You crossed your arms indignantly and pouted. You did in fact have a dirty dream about the men who you’ve come to love and trust over the months you got to know each of them. But were you going to admit that? Absolutely not. 

“Geez, for someone who’s supposed to be older than me, you sure act like a bunch of children.” 

You just realized that they were all older than you, by many more years than you had originally thought. Thinking that Jungkook only had a year on you when you first met, officially deeming you the youngest of your friend group, you didn’t think it were that big of an age gap. Now realizing that he had a couple thousand years on you, you were sorely mistaken. You were like a baby to them. 

Ignoring that little sting to your pride, you rolled your eyes. “And for your information, no I did not have a ‘dirty’ dream. Not that it’s any of your business if I had one anyway.” Well, it technically was their business since it was them who were occupying your less-than-innocent thoughts. 

They finally dropped the subject after teasing you for a few minutes, letting you breathe. The room was filled with the type of silence that wasn’t awkward, but a little tense. It gave you time to actually think about their words. 

You had superpowers. 

You could finally contribute into making the world a better place! 

As you thought about it, you could even feel the energy of your powers surging through your body, making you feel as if you could fly. You couldn’t stop the giddy smile forming on your face even if you wanted to. 

“So,” your voice cut through the silence, seven pairs of eyes focusing their attention on you. You tried to conceal your shaking hands as you practically trembled in excitement about your question. 

“What powers did you give me?” 

~ ~ ~

“Are you guys sure this is a good idea?” Looking around at all seven men, they gave you encouraging nods.

After explaining to you about the powers you had, the boys thought it would be a good idea to take you to a secluded area in which you could test them out. Deciding on going to a more forested area, away from the city and prying eyes, you found yourself in the middle of a clearing, surrounded by beautiful and tall trees, shielding you even more from other people. The serene sounds of nature flooded your senses and you tuned the boys out to listen some more.

You could hear birds chirping and the wind rustling the branches of the trees and the sounds of the insects crawling through the grass. “Do you guys hear that?” You asked, feeling yourself sway to the rhythm of the light breeze that swept past your face. You felt the tingles of the air from your scalp, all the way to the ends of your toes and you smiled. Looking towards the boys, you found that they were staring back at you with variations of confusion masking their faces. Remembering that you now had more enhanced senses than them, an embarrassed smile graced your features. “Uhm, nevermind.” 

You walked to the center of the clearing, sitting down in the grass and listening for more things. You felt a hand grab your own and came face to face with Jimin. You don’t ever think you’d be able to get used to seeing them so clearly now, being able to pick up on every single gorgeous detail. He was smiling at you, and you could hear your heart picking up to an erratic pace, as you managed a smile of your own. “Tell us what you hear,” is all he said and you let out a breath, beginning to explain what you could hear to the best of your ability. 

You told them that you could hear the sounds of the birds chirping from miles away, how you could smell the water of a small creek, feel the breeze brush against every pore of your face and the thrum of the earth against your fingertips. “It’s incredible,” you breathed. The twinkle in your (e/c) eyes was mesmerising and the way the sun shone on your (s/c) skin made you look ethereal. The boys were speechless. 

Pressing your palms further into the ground, you exhaled, closing your eyes and connecting yourself to the nature around you even more. You felt the pulse of life around you, a strong humming that vibrated your body in a way that made you feel delightfully alive. Opening your eyes, you looked at the grass around you and a sudden instinct possessed you to say only one word; “Grow.” 

The grass around you and your group of friends began to slowly rise, growing taller and taller to all of your astonishment. You urged it to stop with a single command and you don’t think you’ve ever smiled harder in your entire existence. “(Y/n)! your eyes!” one by one, seven heads turned toward you and locked onto your face. You stared back, confused and alarmed at Taehyung’s sudden outburst and looked between each of them for an explanation. Pulling out his phone and opening his camera, Yoongi held it out to you and you choked on your breath as you understood why they were so shocked. 

Instead of the usual (e/c) color, your eyes were completely engulfed by a piercing, glowing white. Not even your pupils were visible. “Wow,” You examined them even more, waiting for something to happen and after a few more moments, they returned back to their natural color. “Holy shit!” 

The boys chuckled and you laughed along with them, standing up in your spot. You contemplated your next move and an idea popped into your mind that had you bouncing like a kid in a candy store. “Ok, I wanna try something,” The look of determination on your face was adorable as you turned to them. “This is either going to work out amazingly, or get me seriously injured. But, that’s why you also gave me healing and regeneration!” You tried your best to convince them - and yourself- that everything was going to be fine. 

“Well. . . ok. But please be careful.” Namjoon said, and you turned your attention to him, a cheeky grin on your lips. “I always am.” you sent him a wink, noticing the way his ears turned a cute shade of pink. 

Holding your hands above your head, you concentrated on the wind blowing against your palms. You probably looked as ridiculous as you felt, but you continued on, wanting to see this through. Nothing was happening, so you dropped your hands with a sigh, moving farther away from the group as they watched you closely. You knew you could do this, you felt the connection thrumming through your blood. But feeling your powers and actually activating them were two different things. 

Closing your eyes once again, you concentrated on the wind blowing around you. Seeking the connection you grasped onto it, taking hold of the wind as if it were a lasso and you felt the potential power in your body. 

Blow, Blow, Blow. . . 

The wind kicked up, swarming your body from all directions, you maneuvered it to be below you. 

Blow, More Power, More wind. . . 

As soon as the thoughts processed in your mind, you were suddenly blasted off the ground due to the wind building up beneath you. The shriek that left your mouth turned into a laugh of exhilaration as you were lifted way beyond the tops of the trees. You could see from miles away. 

Then you came hurtling back to earth. You shrieked (again) and focused on the wind, manipulating it to catch your fall. You thankfully landed safely, however, not so gracefully as you were dropped on your ass. The boys immediately swarmed you, checking to see if you were ok, and you swat each of their hands away, bursting into hysterics. You were bouncing around, babbling about how you can’t believe it actually worked before you were blasted off the ground again, the sound your whooping echoing throughout the forest.

The boys watched as you twirled around, free-falling, and then catching yourself once again, only to bound higher up, traveling to and fro as you gave off the allusion that you could fly. A smile graced each of their lips, as they watched you land and bound off once more. 

“Incredible indeed.” 

~~~

You spent a couple more hours in the forest, testing out the extent of your powers before returning back to the city. The next day, the boys returned to the life of idols and you returned to your job at a local cafe. You were in the back, restocking items when he decided to make an appearance. Your manager, Jaehyun, never seemed to get the hint when you tell him that you’ve never been interested. You’ve had to put up with his wandering hands for so long, not being able to do anything but slap his hand away and stay in an open area so he wouldn’t try anything shady. 

You would have reported him weeks ago, but you needed this job. And until you could find a better paying job, far far away from him, you were here to stay unfortunately. You did your best to ignore him, but you were never so lucky when it came to him. 

“What’s up, sexy?” You cringed at his words. How could someone be so crude, and how could that person be your manager of all people?

“I’m busy, Jaehyun.” You replied, keeping your tone icy and refusing to meet his eyes. 

“Awe, not too busy for me, I hope?” when you didn’t answer him, he snatched the cup out of your hand, forcing you to turn around and to meet his smirk with your scowl. “What do you say I take you out to a movie after work? I heard the new Avengers movie came out. What was it called? Final Game or something?” 

Snatching the cup out of his hand you sneered at him, “Endgame. And no thanks, I’ve already seen it.” Turning back around you continued your work, but you heard his heart beating in his chest, which clued you into the fact that he was still behind you. “Ok, well, how about dinner? Ya know, wine and dine, then I take you back to my place to show you a good time?” You scoffed, choosing to ignore his comment.  

“I have to get back to work.” You snapped, turning so you could finish putting the cups and lids in their places. You thought that he had finally gotten the hint - but of course he didn’t - when you felt a pair of hands place themselves on your waist and not so subtly rub their way down your body.

“You know you want this, sweetheart. So stop denying it. I know that every time you say no, you really mean yes.” His hands began to slide down to the area where you absolutely did not want him to touch.

Was he serious????

You were seething where you were standing and you just hoped that steam wasn’t coming out of your ears as your face practically burned in rage. Snatching his hand before he could unbutton and unzip your pants, you turned around, twisting his hand violently and feeling a tingle of delight when he cried out in pain.

“When a person says no,” you squeezed his hand, listening to him yell and clearly hearing the door opening and a shocked gasp. “They mean NO. They don’t mean ‘yes’ or ‘maybe’ or ‘some other time’. Just because you can’t cope with rejection doesn’t mean you get to take advantage of your workers. I. Am not. Interested. And this is the last time I’m gonna tell you politely. So fuck off!”

You pushed him away from you and made your way back to the door when you felt his hand grab your arm, yanking you back and sneering a “I’m not done with you bitch,” in your face. Out of reflex, you quickly brought your fist up and connected it with his nose. Had this happened before you got your powers, it would have just bruised up. But now with the added strength, you were almost certain he would need surgery after hearing and feeling the crunch when you threw the punch.

Effectively knocking him to the floor, you stepped away and marched to grab your bag and jacket as you knew that you had just quit your job in the most violent way. You were a woman on a mission, ignoring the employees who just stood and watched, some even recording the whole thing, and making your way to the front to leave. You had just gotten to the cash register, almost out the door, when you heard a growl and your ex manager came bursting through the door, cradling his bloody nose and throwing a heated glare your way.

“You just lost your job, you ungrateful little slut! Good luck finding someplace else that would treat you the way we did!” You scoffed at that, steadying your breathing so you wouldn’t end up killing this guy.

“As if I want another job where my boss treated me like a piece of meat and constantly groped me even when I said no! I would rather scrub the leaches out of the devil’s asshole than work for you!”

A stunned silence fell over the entire cafe, and with your final and creative choice of wording, you stormed out the cafe.

Alrighty! So, this is probably long overdue, but I have not been able to find the time to update anything. But on the bright side, I have tons of ideas for stories/one-shots, so look forward to those in the far future. 

Hope you enjoyed this chapter and let me know what you think! Your feedback is always welcomed! 

[theonewiththefanfics]

I’m Gonna Get Myself Back Home To You (one-shot)

Requested: by Anon (the same one who requested Just Touch My Cheek Before You Leave) hope you like this one :) not really a happy ending, but more so bittersweet... just the way things progressed, whoops :D

Synopsys: Sometimes time spent apart isn’t a good thing. Sometimes it lets the people drift too apart. And sometimes you just need to let things go.

Pairing: Ben Hardy x f!Reader

Genre: angst

Warnings: swearing??? maybe??? I don’t even remember :D

Word count: 2417

   For a while, Y/N had known something was wrong. The calls became sparser, the smiles were faked and the ‘I love yous’ were said through tight lips, eyes never meeting. So now, when Ben’s name was glaring at her on the phone screen, she had to swallow a lump in her throat.    “Hey, love,” he said, the usually bright green eyes, tired and glazed. “How are you?”    “ ‘M good,” Y/N mumbled, looking around their apartment. She felt like an intruder, had been feeling that way for a while now. “Actually, no. I’m not.”    Instantly worry flooded through Ben’s veins. “Are you alright? Do I need to fly out?”    They had gone to LA for two months to film additional shots for ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ and as much Y/N missed Ben, it seemed like a blessing in disguise now.    “It’s actually much better that you’re not here,” she muttered, not looking at him. “If you were, I don’t think I’d be able to do this.”    “Do what?” Ben’s heart pumped so hard, it was the only sound he could hear. “Baby, what are you talking about?”    “I think we need to break up,” it was barely a whisper, and Y/N wanted to slap herself because, for the first time in months, her heart felt light. “It’s just not working anymore. I can’t take this.”    Ben didn’t respond. He couldn’t, for he no longer had a voice. He didn’t even think he was breathing. The sight before him became blurry, and hot wet tears dropped down in his lap.    “We can make this work. Please, love. I’ll- I’ll come home. Right now, just don’t do this.” “A relationship is not a fairytale,” Y/N said, wiping her own tears away. “Nothing magically falls into place, Ben. You have to work, hard, to keep that good thing intact. But I think neither of us has been doing anything to save it. We just kinda... let it roll on its own course and now we’ve drifted apart. Too far apart.”    “No, we can sti-“    “I’ll have my stuff out by the end of the week, and I’ll leave the key in the mailbox,” Y/N interrupted him before Ben could argue any further. “I’m sorry.” And with that she ended the call, curling up in a ball, letting sobs shake her body.

***

   On the other side of the world, Ben stared at the black screen of his phone, completely frozen in spot. He must have misheard the conversation, he must have made all of that up in his mind, cause there was no way in hell, Y/N would have actually broken up with him.    Faintly he heard someone call his name, but with the way his head pounded, Ben wasn’t sure if it had been a trick of the mind. A strong palm clamped down on his shoulder, and he was startled back to reality.    “Mate, you alright?” Gwil’s voice was the epitome of concern.    “Y/N,” he said turning around, eyebrows furrowed as his brain was still attempting to wrap around the new information. “She- umm- she just broke up with me… I think…”    “What?” Gwil’s eyes widened as he took a step forward his friend and gripped his shoulder tighter. “And what do you mean ‘you think’?”    “I mean, I just called her to say 'hi' and that I miss her, and the conversation ended with her saying she’ll have her stuff out of the flat by the end of the week.” Tears rose in his eyes. “That means she ended things, right?”    The question had the tone of ‘please tell me it’s not true’, but the looks his fellow cast mates shared between them, told Ben enough.    “What did I do wrong?” he was breaking apart at the seams. “Why would she do that?’    “I-“ the other Brit stumbled over his words, cause he truly didn’t know what to say. “I have no clue why Y/N would do that.”    Joe and Rami glanced at one another, Rami chewing on the inside of his cheek, trying to figure out something to say that would console their friend, but it would seem his fellow American was faster.    “Dude, what are you still doing here?” Joe came forward and pushed Ben towards where the trailers were. “Go and get your girl back.”    “B-“    “Every second you spend here, only pushes her further away. And if we have to be next to you as you sulk about a breakup, rather than simply being away from Y/N, I swear to everything holy, I will personally kill you,” it was Rami who said it, lips tugging up in a smile. “Go and help that girl get her head back in its place. She loves you, and I’ll be damned if there isn’t more to this than her simply wanting to break up.”    Without wasting another moment, Ben dashed towards his trailer, ripped off the clothes and wig, and like a madman raced to the airport.

***

The night was dark, as usual, but this time it also felt heavy. She had dropped Frankie at Ben’s parents, saying she had to go out of town for a couple of weeks and would only be back by the end of it. When seeing the confusion on Ben’s mom’s face, why Y/N wouldn’t be picking Frankie up, she made up a little lie, how Ben would be visiting London, and he would be flying in before the girl.      She had packed just the essentials and called up one of her best friends Anna, who at that moment was out of town, but allowed the girl to use her apartment. Being in the place where she used to see her future was too hard because now, nothing but ash floated in the air.    Pathetically, she was attempting to make some food. Pasta Bolognese seemed like something a toddler could make, but through the crying and shaking, she managed to overboil and turn the pasta into a mush and burn the sauce. She couldn’t even taste the tomatoes, even though she'd cut a whole one in, just to minimize the flavour of charred food.    In the end, she dumped the sad attempt at a dinner in the garbage and ordered some greasy takeout. Maybe that would fill the Ben-sized hole in her chest. Y/N gazed at the blank TV screen for what seemed like hours, before deciding on grabbing a hot shower and going to bed.    Scalding water met her skin and she savoured every flaming pellet. In a way, she thought to herself, it was like a phoenix rising from the ashes, only this time she wasn’t reborn. More so the water, if only for a second, washed away that defiled layer, of Y/N, that had had the audacity to hurt Ben.    But reality has a nasty habit of settling back in and ripping one out of a dream. As the warm water ran cold, Y/N reached out and grabbed a towel wrapping it around her body. Shivers had already settled in, but they could not be helped, for they were not of cold, but from the sobs, that overtook her form.    Crying, she slipped under the covers and crying Y/N fell asleep, letting her mind be overtaken by the blissful unconsciousness, where Ben existed; smiling and happy and not in the heartbroken state, she had left him in.

***

   Rapid knocks against the door woke Y/N up. She was delirious for a moment and thought she had only imagined it, but then they came again, this time stronger and much more persistent.    “I’m coming!” Y/N called out, her voice a rasp from all of the weeping she’d done the night before. Looking in the mirror, the girl saw just how horrible she looked, so quickly snatching her hairbrush she pulled it through her hair, once, twice. Deeming that part presentable, Y/N quickly rushed in the bathroom and splashed cold water on her face to somewhat give it an ‘I’m-not-a-zombie-please-believe-me’ look, before the knocks came again.    Grabbing Anna’s silk robe, Y/N pulled it over the tank top and shorts, and thinking it was her that had come home a bit earlier than planned from the trip, without thinking, she yanked the door open, only for all the air to be punched out of her body. “Y/N.”    Her name was a breathless whisper of hope, love and adoration on his lips. Of home. Ben took a step forward, ready to engulf her in his arms when she stepped back.    “What are you doing here?”    For a moment there, he couldn’t move a muscle, but luckily his mouth had a mind of its own. “Please, come home.” “I am home,” Ben could hear the pain in Y/N’s voice as she told the lie to him and herself. “No,” he shook his head, stepping inside her friend’s small apartment where she was staying until she found her own place, and grasping at her wrist. “No, you’re not. This isn’t home. It’s with me in our flat, where Frankie runs around like crazy. It’s where all of our plants die, cause we’re two bloody idiots who always forget to water them,” Ben stepped even closer and pressed his forehead against hers. “It’s where we started to build our life together. That’s home. Not here or wherever you’re planning on moving.”    “Then how come it no longer feels like it? How come when I think of us, it’s always you and me, separately?”    “Don’t say things like that, please, Y/N,” Ben was crying, and she couldn’t help herself. She hated seeing him hurt, so with a tender touch, she wiped the translucent pearls away. “I told you, we’ll make it work. I’ll take more time off, I’ll come and visit more often, please.”    “I don’t want you to sacrifice everything you’ve worked so hard for!” she harshly replied. “I won’t let you.”    “If it’s the price I have to pay to be with you, I’ll give everything up!”    “And then what?” Y/N scoffed. “Trust me, a few years down the line, hell, give it a few months or even a few weeks, and you’ll start to hate me and resent me for what I made you give up.”    “Do you not realise how little I care for any of it if I don’t have you by my side to take part in it all? It means nothing when I can’t share the world with the person I love most!”    “But I don’t fit in it!” and there it was. That vile truth Y/N hadn’t wanted to admit to. She didn’t fit in his world. He was a big-shot Hollywood star, girls and guys flocking around him 24/7, begging for any bit of attention the handsome Brit could give, and Y/N… she was just that… Y/N. A girl who got lucky when Ben had noticed her, and she had stolen his heart. A girl who fell in love with a blond-haired, green-eyed boy, whose smile could light up New York City in the dark.    And for a while, they had relished in the fantasy that was their lives, before Y/N noticed how different they actually were. He was surrounded by glitz and glam, while she was surrounded by essays and Red Bull cans and three all-nighters in a row.    He was the bright Sun, warming up the Earth and Y/N was a small meteorite hitting the atmosphere and burning up instantly, not even large enough to leave a mark that she’d been there.    “Do you love me?” Ben’s voice brought her out of the pondering, and two warm palms settled on her cheeks, making her look up in those emerald eyes.    “Ben…”    “It’s a simple question. Do you love me?”    A beat passed before Y/N answered, every single word being completely true. “I never stopped and never will stop loving you.”    He was just about to lean in to press their lips together when Y/N’s palm came in between them. “But love isn’t enough,” her voice cracked. “It’s never enough, cause you can’t build a relationship worth fighting for, off of it… and when you feel like an outsider looking in, it’s even more discouraging.”    “What can I do?” Ben whispered, desperate to somehow fix a seemingly unfixable thing. “How can I convince you, that whatever we’re going through, is worth it in the end?”    Y/N’s voice was small, the same way she felt. “I don’t know. I don’t think you can. Cause you’ve been nothing but loving and supporting and amazing. And the guys and all of your other friends, as well… and that’s the thing- no one has explicitly done anything to make me feel like I don’t belong… I just can’t help but feel that way… which is even worse, because then I’d have an actual excuse of why I’m throwing away three of the best years of my life, but I don’t.”    Ben sighed, wrapping his arms around Y/N, and this time she didn’t protest, letting herself melt in his embrace. He hid his nose in her hair and pressed his lips against her forehead before speaking.    “I know, that whatever I say, won’t change how you feel. Not now, but sometime down the line, I hope you realize how amazing and special you are. But I won’t push you to live in the limelight like I do. So, if you want to break up, I will accept it. Not gladly, but I’ll… figure out a way to move on.”    Her heart broke at Ben’s confession.    “But,” he said, “I’d like for us to try. We can start off completely new, a blank page, if you will,” his voice dropped down to a deep husk. “I just don’t want to lose such a good, thing. We’re so good together.”    Y/N’s mind was reeling as thoughts came and went one after the other. A new start, continue on with the old one or leave everything behind. Never had she hated being in the crossroads so much.    “I’ve already hurt you so much, Ben… I don’t wanna do it again.”    She heard him sniffle and felt his grip tighten on her body. “Then come home,” he replied. “We’ll work through it together, no matter how long it takes. Just come home.”    And despite everything, despite the fact she’d never truly feel like the fame and fortune was for her, Y/N nodded her head, pressing a kiss to Ben’s neck before burying her face in the crook of it. She'd fight for it because Ben was her home.

Tags (crossed out wouldn’t take): @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64 @supernaturalbaesduh @breezy1415 @crazy--me @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sea040561 @staryeyedgirl @deathbyarabbit @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91 @dalilx @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns @averyrogers83 @in-the-end-im-still-trash @gallifreyansass @dewy-biitch @avxgers @unlikelygalaxygiver @sweet-ladyy @magicwithaknife @16wiishes @wanderingsami @desir-ae @thiccio-and-thicciet @roseslovedreams @vesoleil @gloomybisexualemo @kostyaownsmyheart @perriwiinkle @screaminggalileochickenwrites

A/N: boiiii, do I like to make you all suffer :D

Woke up this morning to find out there are 4k of you following my blog.... ummmmm whatttttt????!!!! hooooooowwww?????!!! whyyyyyyy?????!!!!!!

all of that aside- a huge thank you, for liking, commenting and reblogging my work. any author without an audience to share their pieces with would be nothing, so big hugs and kisses and all of that jazz to each and every one who follows me or just though ‘meh, that was alright’ :))))

P.S. what did you think?

P.S.S. my tags are always open, don’t be afraid to drop a message :)

[themadamelibrarian]

Should Have Known Better - Part 1 of To The Heart and Mind

Written By: @themadamelibrarian & @helvonasche​ Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s) Characters: Dean Winchester, Original Female Character(s), Sam Winchester Additional Tags: Demon Dean Winchester, Mark of Cain, Angst, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha Dean Winchester Summary:

To the heart and mind Ignorance is kind There's no comfort in the truth Pain is all you'll find

NOTE: Written for an ABO challenge, song is Careless Whisper.

Share this story and show support for the creator!

Tagging: @copperseraphim @thenanahunter @lucibae-is-dancing-in-hell @idabbleincrazy  @truxblooded

LINK TO AO3

Sam checked his watch for the third time in the past hour as Lacey paced around the room. Every once in awhile he could see her place her hand protectively on her stomach, as if that simple action would change the fact that the pregnant Omega was having to confront her Alpha.

Dean kept a keen eye on her, a malicious smile tilting at the corner of his mouth. He noticed that she seemed a little fuller, softer in appearance and although he didn’t care one way or another, he knew that her insecurities about her weight were an easy target. “Puttin’ on a little weight there, Lacey? Eating your feelings again?”

Glancing at Sam as he went to get the next dose of purified blood ready she dropped her hand, Lacey worried for a moment that he would be cruel; then her anger took hold. After weeks of not knowing where he was, what, rather who,he was doing, she focused on what she needed to do. Keeping her pregnancy a secret had been difficult, but staying with him through this was important. Returning her attention to the man she once loved, she leveled him with a venomous glare as she heard Sam return.

Tilting his head as he studied the new dynamic between his brother and mate, Dean had a moment of realization as he said, “Oh, you got yourself knocked up… Who’s the daddy?” his eyes slid to his brother as he snorted derisively, “Sure as shit ain’t me, you won’t touch me anymore. Frigid Omega, bitch.”

After Sam gave Dean the last shot of purified blood, they watched as Dean dropped his head. For a moment, Lacey and Sam waited for any sign of movement. Sam had been worrying that they weren’t curing him. He was half convinced that they were killing him, but knew Lacey wouldn’t have cared. Sam hoped that she would eventually realize, like he had, that Dean was still a slave to the Mark, his actions were barely his own, but now wasn’t the time. He had to do the only thing he could: understand.

Dean lifted his head and opened his eyes. Black for only a moment as they faded and his expression seemed to change. Lacey took a step forward, opened the flask of holy water and splashed him in the face. He stared up at her, the holy water had done nothing, and Dean seemed to crumple in front of her as his eyes dropped to her stomach.

“It’s yours. I’m leaving,” she said bitterly, as she turned away and handed the flask to Sam.

Eyes widening in realization that Lacey was leaving, Dean started jerking against the cuffs holding him, “Lacey, wait!” he tried to free himself but when none of his restraints would budge, he turned a desperate gaze to his brother, “Let me out of this, Sammy. Now.”

Hesitating for a moment, Sam rushed forward and released Dean from the chair. “She’s pissed, Dean,” Sam warned as Dean stood, “Give her time to calm down.”

“She can have all the time she want’s but she’s not leaving… not now,” Dean said as he rushed past Sam and down the halls, hoping he wasn’t too late to stop her.

As Dean ran out of the dungeon, Sam followed. He was worried that Dean might not be completely himself or that he might hurt Lacey in an attempt to stop her from leaving. Dean had loved her and obviously still did, but he was in no shape to be chasing after her and trying to convince her of anything. Sam knew it was fruitless to try to stop him, but he had to keep Lacey safe too. Even worn to the bone, Sam would protect them from themselves with his last breath.

Grabbing her bags and packing what little she still had in her room, she paused for a moment as she heard the pounding footsteps of the Winchesters. Lacey sighed as she haphazardly shoved her belongs into the backpack. She wanted too many conflicting things. Telling Dean had been paramount, she wanted to watch his face when he realized that he not only had a child but that he had fucked it all up. She didn’t want to see him, didn’t want to talk to him; she wanted nothing to do with him.

Rounding the corner slightly out of breath, Dean looked over the room as Lacey zipped up her bag. The rasping sound of the zipper sounded so final, but Dean wasn’t going to give up that easily. “Lace, please… don’t go. Not like this. I know I screwed up and you’re mad, but we can fix it. I swear I’ll make things right,” Dean pleaded as he stepped into the room and placed his hand over hers.

Lacey pulled her hand back as if he had burned her. She seethed silently as she stared at him, as she practically growled, “No,” before walking around him.

“Lace,” Dean called, following after her, “Please, Lacey. I’m me again, we can be together like we used to before all this. Just give me a chance.”

Lacey rounded on Dean, breathing heavily as she pointed at his arm, “You still have that Goddamned Mark. Do you remember Valentine’s Day? I sure as shit do.”

Sam, who’d been following them stopped dead in his tracks as his mind started whirling a mile a minute, counting the months between Valentine’s Day and that morning. When he realized that it’d been almost six months, his eyes widened in surprise. That had to be the day that the baby had been conceived. He realized that Lacey was angry, but this situation was quickly devolving and his concern wasn’t so much for his brother’s well being but for Lacey’s. Solitary Omegas who were as far along as she was didn’t do well when they were separated from their mates. “Lacey, calm down for a second. You know it’s not good for the baby and I don’t think Dean understands.”

Sighing as he realized that he had to explain what would probably end up being one of the worst things Dean had ever had to deal with, Sam said in a low voice, “She’s six months pregnant, Dean.”

Dean looked between the two of them, and asked Sam, “What are you talking about, man?”

Taking a moment, Sam gauged Dean’s reaction before he elaborated. “She conceived on Valentine’s Day.”

As Sam turned to Lacey and tried to reason with her, the memories flooded Dean’s mind. They had been trying to be normal after he got the Mark. February 13th, his rut had started and he nearly lost his mind. Lacey, ever patient, had stayed, but by the next day he had changed. The vivid memory of her on her knees, his cock buried to the hilt as his blood boiled in his veins, her moans turning to pleas, and he couldn’t stop. It hadn’t been that different from his other ruts when they first got together, but something about it was worse. She had left afterwards while he slept and refused to talk about what had happened.

Dean felt tears burning his eyes as he watched Sam, unable to speak or understand what he was saying to Lacey. He knew he hadn’t raped her, but part of him knew that he wasn’t himself anymore. Even before all the demon bullshit, the Mark changed him, he was cold and distant, even with her, and he knew that eventually he’d give into the Mark again. What if he hurt her next time… What if he hurt the baby, his baby…

“I-I’m sorry,” Dean said, voice thick with emotion, “I can be better. Do better.”

“I’m not doing this,” Lacey said as she pushed past them and walked down the hall away from them. Over her shoulder she yelled, “I’ll call you when I find a motel, Sam.”

Sam nodded but turned to his brother; over the last few months, Sam and she had developed a closer relationship, almost like that of siblings. Even though he wanted to kick Dean’s ass from here to Canada and back again for what he’d put them all through, he couldn’t do anything but watch Lacey walk away. Chasing after her wouldn’t bring her back, and Sam wasn’t worried that Dean would hurt her anymore. Dean ran after her and Sam let them have their privacy; he didn’t need to hear or see this.

Slamming the door to her car after throwing her bag in, Lacey turned to face Dean. He always had to have the last word, make his point, but she wouldn’t let him this time. He had taken too much and was only thinking of himself. Taking a deep breath, she tried to remember that Dean was her mate, she had loved him and when he got rid of the Mark they might be able to make it work. She needed time, and he needed to let her have it. “Dean, you have to stop.”

Dean closed the distance between them and placed a hand on the roof of the car. “Lacey, I’m beggin’ ya. I’ll do anything to make this better. Just tell me what you want me to do.”

“I need time,” she said flatly as she took a step back, “and space.”

Looking into her eyes and seeing that she was closing herself off, he realized that she meant every word she said. Lacey was leaving and no matter what he did, he couldn’t change that fact. Taking a step back, he ran a hand through his hair as he tried to process everything. Maybe it was for the best that she get as far away from him as possible. He wasn’t good for her, not really. Not while he still carried the Mark, but there was the baby - his baby.

Here was the one thing they’d talked about in the small hours of the morning; a family. They hadn’t planned for it or even really agreed to try. It was more like wishful thinking. A ‘what if we got out’ game that they’d play so that they felt like they still had a choice in the way their lives went. He was going to be a father and regardless of the how’s and why’s of it, he wanted this life with her. “I’m still me,” Dean finally croaked.

“You aren’t, Dean!” Lacey shouted, finally exhausted. She was pregnant, pissed, and not going to hold Dean’s hand while he sorted his shit out; and she unleashed every bitter thought she had had over the past six months. “I don’t care if this hurts you, you selfish prick. I have more important things to worry about than your fucking feelings, now that you have them. You can never make it better, this will always hurt, and there isn’t a damn thing you can do about it.”

Lacey’s biting words hit Dean harder than any punch she could have thrown and it felt like his world was falling apart around him. The tears welled up and slid down his cheeks no matter how hard he tried to swallow the pain back down, “Lace, I love you- You know I love you. I’m so damned sorry. I didn’t mean for any of this to- It was- I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

As his face fell, she walked around the car and got in, slamming the door before she turned to look at him. He was a mess. What have I done, she thought as she turned the car on and drove off.

Fear froze him for a split second, then he was running after her car. His limbs were protesting, but he couldn’t let her go, he couldn’t let her leave. He was able to keep up as she drove toward the road, banging on the trunk and roof over her car as he pleaded, “Lacey, please, don’t do this, stay here, please don’t leave, don’t leave me, not like this.” Her car stopped for a moment before she turned onto the state highway. Dean watched as the tail lights began to fade; dropping to his knees, he cried out, “Please stay!”

[paladin-andric]

When Worlds Collide (Part 3)

Part 1

Part 2

Well, I didn’t really plan on this. This was supposed to be a small intro to the paladins’ quest, but it grew and grew...until it just become the short itself. Welp. Here, we learn the fate of the pair that escaped the English army, and learn a bit more about life in the land here, along with the tribe’s relations with their neighbors. Just some world and character building more than anything.

Before anything else, there was a sharp, throbbing pain. He could feel it rocking his senses, located in the sides of his head. A migraine.

Though, that wasn’t the end of it. As his consciousness came flooding back, the sensation of pain began to fill every inch of his body. In addition to his migraine, he was aching sore all over.

He groaned, body shifting under what felt like soft linen blankets. As he did so, it brought the attention of another.

“Alpa! Alpa, it’s Alpa! He’s up! Alpa’s up!”

The excited cries of his friend. Alpa brought a hand to his head and rubbed it, claws scraping against his scales as he tried in vain to soothe the pangs of shooting pain in his skull.

“He’s awake?”

“Yes, yes! Get him the things, please!”

“Guuuhhh...Mepin...?”

“Yes, yes!” his friend cried excitedly, “It’s me!”

“What...happened?”

He managed to force his eyes open. The top half of Mepin poked over the side of the bed, his hands resting on the mattress as he leaned towards Alpa, shooting the resting magician a toothy grin.

“We made it! We made it to safety! We’re okay!”

Alpa blinked, eyes adjusting to the light. He took a moment to examine his surroundings. He was in...a human bedroom.

Well, it seemed human. Nothing the tribe would ever build. The walls were made of wood, and several windows to the right were letting sunshine into the room. There were bookshelves, candles, a desk, a chest...and a small cross beside him on the nightstand, the symbol of the humans’ God.

“Where are we?”

“Greenroot Village!”

The bedridden kobold blinked again, face scrunching up. “H-huh…? But...the forest…”

“I carried you! Albert took us in! You remember mister Albert, don’t you?”

“Mmm...yes. He’s done right by our people.”

“Greenroot’s wonderful! I can’t believe they let us stay! Thank the heavens we’re on such good terms!”

“Mmph. We’ve mistress to thank for our friendship with the humans...wait, mistress!” Alpa tried to shoot up in his bed, but his body refused. The pain shot through him like a bolt of lightning, and he hissed out as he slowly scooted backwards, propping himself against the wall and inching into a sitting position. “S-she is in danger!”

“Don’t worry, everything’s gonna be alright!” Mepin assured his friend. He did not have the calming effect he intended to have.

“Are you mad?! They’ll slaughter everyone! We...we must…”

“I met some hero-men on the way here! Some humans saw what happened to us too! We explained everything, and they’re on the case!”

“Hero-men?” Alba gave Mepin a confused look.

“Yeah yeah! Big and strong! Shiny armor, shiny shiny! Big swords and funny shapes on their clothes! Big words about heaven!”

The magician grimaced. His friend...he certainly did not share the same sort of lifestyle as he. As a man of magic, he studied among any he could...be they human, dragon or otherwise. He frequently left the tribe to journey to accomplished wizards willing to give him a chance to learn. As such, he was...well adapted to civilized life.

Mepin, on the other hand, well...he was but a simple gatherer. He pranced about the forest gathering wood, stone, berries...whatever was needed, really. As such, he never really left, aside from the rare visit to Greenroot, a village nearby the tribe that was on very good terms with them.

Because of this, he had some uniquely…‘koboldish’ habits, his occasional lack of awareness and stunted speech clear signs of that. While Alpa had taught him some of the ‘Big words’, he still fell back on jumbled and dull descriptions of things sometimes, and failed to grasp how life in the outside world worked.

Not that he held it against him. It was simply a result of his way of living. Besides...he was his friend, and it would take a lot more than that to drive a wedge between the pair...especially after what had just happened.

“What...funny shapes? Crosses?”

“Yeah, yeah! Lots of crosses! Big words too!”

His friend was normally well spoken enough, but when he got excited enough he lost focus...and he seemed ecstatic that his buddy was alright.

“Sounds like you met a couple of paladins, Mepin.”

“Oooh...the holy heroes?! Wow...if only I’d known!”

“But they’re helping? Truly?”

Mepin nodded happily. “Yes! They had the villagers bring us back while they left to go after the bad men!”

He looked quite giddy about the whole thing, like a couple of men going after an army was a valid strategy that would somehow work out.

“Hey, Alpa!”

The magician turned to see the source of the voice, though he already recognized it.

A man with a bushy mustache and a small smile entered the room, a wooden bowl in each hand. He was wearing simple but clean clothes, a tunic, a pair of breeches and some rough-looking shoes.

“Aah, Sir Albert! You are my savior, allowing me respite like this!”

“Ahh, nice try, but your friend over there’s the one that dragged your sorry butt all the way here.” He lowered one of the bowls toward the bed as he approached. “Here.”

“Oh?” The lizard reached up and carefully took the bowl, noting the weight behind it. He lowered it to his lap and found...a thick, hearty broth with just about everything in it. Corn, potato, some greens, bits of what he assumed to be chicken or beef...a bit of a hunter’s stew.

“Figured since you’re unwell, a bit of soup would help you get back on your feet.”

“Gah, you house AND feed me? You spoil me, good sir.”

Albert lowered the other bowl towards Mepin, who eagerly snatched it up without a second word. “Now, now. It took a lot of work to make peace between our villages. Wouldn’t want to tarnish that now, would we?”

“Ah, prudent. Still...I must give my humble thanks, and insist I repay your hospitality.”

Albert shrugged. “Well...promise you’d do the same for me. How about that?”

“That is a most suitable agreement. I would never turn my back on a friend...as they would not to do me either.”

He turned to Mepin, his expression softening. A smile crept over his face, and he could feel...something. A deep respect, a kinship. The other kobold smiled back at him.

“Mepin, my friend...thank you. You have saved my life, I have no reservations in saying that. I was in the gravest sort of peril.”

“You were only in danger ‘cause you saved me first!” Mepin insisted, “That’s just what friends do!”

“Hmm...indeed. Trust is a most valuable thing to have. I believe we’ve all learned something from this. Still...thank you, Mepin. You are a very good friend.”

“You’re a great friend too!” the other returned quickly, still grinning.

Albert gestured towards the two. “Hey, I put a lotta work into whipping that up for you two, you know!”

“Ah, of course! Forgive my rudeness. Allow me to sample your cuisine…”

Alpa slowly lifted the bowl to his mouth, and gently tilted it upwards. As the soup filled his mouth, he could only describe it as...soothing. It was salty and sweet, tender and tasty. From vegetables to meat, the flavors all melded into a rather pleasing concoction within the soup base. As he swallowed it after a bit of chewing, he could feel the heat radiating within him. So warm...so soothing.

“Well?”

“Mmm...marvelous. This is why I love coming to Greenroot...you people certainly know how to make some outstanding meals.”

“Gah, go on...thank you, though. Hope it helps.

It was already helping. The warm, soothing soup seemed to be melting his aches and pains away...though that could have just been a placebo. Still, it made everything just a bit more bearable. He leaned back and took another big gulp...then another, and another.

“Aah...I cannot thank you enough. Mmm...”

“Don’t worry about it...only thing you need to worry about it getting better.”

“Agh, mmm...w-well, but the tribe…”

“Leave it to the professionals. I’m sure those paladins have got it under control. You couldn’t help much until you rested up anyway.”

That was true. He struggled to sit up...he doubted he could just up and walk out...besides, he’d have to stop having this soup…

A loud splash brought both the kobold and the human to turn towards Mepin. The other kobold was guzzling the soup down, tipping the bowl far too high and spilling a large about of broth both on himself and on the floor.

“Gah, Mepin, you fool!”

He blinked, lowering the bowl. “Huh? What?”

“The soup! You’ve spilled it all over!” Alba pointed at the floor, arm still sore.

The kobold looked down and then back up rapidly, comprehension dawning on him.

“O-oh, oh no! I-I didn’t mean to…”

“Forgive him,” Alpa said, “He struggles with what is...socially acceptable in your culture.”

Albert merely grumbled under his breath in response.

“I assure you,” Alpa continued, “He was being MOST polite in our ways. Displaying his eagerness for your fine cooking, you see.”

“I-it was just so good...I couldn’t help myself! I’m sorry,” Mepin said guiltily, eyes turned to the side.

“Eh...it’s fine...hope you’re willing to help clean up, though.”

“Of course!” Mepin cried, “Right away!”

“Very well. Let’s fetch the water.” As Albert left with Mepin to start cleaning up the mess, he turned and gave Alpa a serious look.

“Just get some rest. Tossin’ and turnin’ isn’t going to do you any good. The sooner you recover, the sooner you can check on your friends.”

“Right…” Alpa mumbled back. Albert gave him a smile and a nod before stepping out of the room.

He tried, he really did. He lay back down and closed his eyes, but...he shifted in the bed. He rustled the covers. His tail thrashed of its own volition.

He couldn’t stop thinking. Were they okay? Did the soldiers find their cave? Would the paladins really save the day somehow?

These thoughts and more troubled his mind, preventing sleep. As he lay there, he tried to imagine it. Those two warriors, off to try and do something. He could picture them in his head, heading into the forest...who were they? What were they doing right now? At this very moment, as he lay in bed, those two were marching headfirst into a most unusual situation...and they had a most unusual plan of how to handle it.

Tag list: @thereisnothingwrongwithbeingmad, @lady-redshield-writes, @paper-shield-and-wooden-sword, @sheralynnramsey, @tawnywrites, @writer-on-time, @oceanwriter, @zwergis-spilledink, @fluffpiggy, @elliewritesfantasy, @homesteadhorner,  @laurenwastestimewriting, @elaynab-writing, @the-ichor-of-ruination, @reya-writes

[whichstiel]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Supernatural Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester Characters: Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural) Additional Tags: Spn 14x01, supernatural episode coda, episode coda, Episode: s14e01 Stranger in a Strange Land, musings on hope and humanity, demon dean flashback Series: Part 1 of Season 14 Codas Summary:

An episode coda for season 14, episode 1.

Dean and Castiel reflect on hope and humanity in the shadow of Michael’s possession. 

(Also included in its entirety below because it’s pretty short. But please tell me what you think on AO3 or Tumblr! Comments are always appreciated.)

They were whispering about him at the other end of the bar. Dean sipped his whiskey, savoring the burn against his tongue, and eavesdropped over the hum of twanging guitar playing on the bar’s speakers.

“How long do we have to stick around this dump of a town? I haven't killed anything in at least a week.”

The second demon’s voice was lower, as though she was afraid of being overheard. “Until Crowley says it’s time to move on.”

Dean rolled his eyes. Brent and Laura. They had been flexing their muscles all over town, painting a big target on the motley King’s court staying at the motel attached to the bar. Crowley really ought to do something about them. Kill ‘em, or send them away.

Brent snorted. “You mean, until Winchester says it’s time to move on. I’ll admit, I was on board with the whole Hell’s Knight thing when I thought we’d be rampaging the fucking countryside with, you know biblical flaming fucking swords. But so far we’ve just watched him and Crowley make…make fucking cow eyes at each other.”

Laura grumbled a disgusted reply.

“Did you know,” Brent lowered his voice and glanced around the bar. Dean prevented himself from reacting, staring at his whiskey glass like it was the only object that mattered in the world. “They set up another date? A date.” He spat out the word like it was a curse.

“No,” Laura sounded scandalized. “That’s so…so…civilized. I can’t believe we’re sticking around town so Winchester can have a…a fivesome.” She called across the room to the bartender for another drink and after she took a long swallow of beer she said, “Knight of Hell, my ass.”

“Fucking weak.”

Dean took another sip of whiskey. He let the glass linger on his lips, enjoying the fire against his skin. Dean heard a lot of imprecations against his character lately. That was a consequence of falling in with demons. If he acted against every insult he'd have perpetually bloody knuckles and a whole hell of a lot less fun.

The truth was, they weren’t sticking around for the triplets, though they were very fun. Instead, he and Crowley were sticking around because the bar’s nice. It had a good sound system and decent booze, and there was plenty of tail to chase in this transitory place. Crowley had suggested moving on, but Dean had stopped him. “When was the last time you ever had a chance to relax, man?” And Crowley had taken one good look at him and backed right down. That’s true. Never. Might as well.

It was a good situation, and Dean didn’t intend to screw it up any more than he had to. He’d just sit quietly, finish his drink, and maybe bamboozle the bachelorette party camped out in the corner out of some hard earned money. Or sleep with the bride-to-be. The night was young.

But of course that wasn’t the end of it. Of course there was more.

An elbow bumped into Dean a little while later, deliberate and sharp against his back. “Oops,” Brent said at his ear. “Sorry. ”

Dean turned in his seat slowly and let his gaze flick along Brent fleetingly, like he was a fly. He turned away again, only Brent cleared his throat and said, “How does it feel?”

Dean swiveled to Brent and raised his brows consideringly. “Excuse me?”

“How does it feel,” Brent said with a sneer, “to suck so miserably at being a demon? I swear to god, you’re the most white bread demon I ever—”

Dean smiled lazily and grabbed the demon’s arm. His fingers cut into Brent hard enough to elicit a wince and Dean’s smile grew into a grin. “You got a problem with me, Brent?” Fear flicked across Brent’s expression, but it quickly turned into disgust. Dean let him pluck his fingers from his arm and drop his hand away. “You’re drunk. Which is a real fucking accomplishment for a demon, so kudos to you.” Dean lifted his glass in a mock salute.

“Yeah? Well you’re a shitty demon. Shitty and boring and…” A knowing expression crossed his face. “Bet it was all the angel dick you were getting.” He thrust his hips once and hissed, “Oh yeah, that sweet fire of the lord! Diluting everything that should make you great. Making you a waste of…of everyone’s time. You’re not a real demon.”

The Mark hissed against Dean’s forearm. It bubbled like liquor in his blood and he found himself baring his teeth. He let go of his glass. “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” he warned.

Brent snorted. “Please, everyone knows. Crowley’s talked about it. Hell, everybody talks about it. I don’t know why we bother when it’s obvious you’ve been compro— urk”

A moment later, Dean pulled the knife out of the demon’s ribs, winking as the blade scraped against bone. He swiped Brent’s blood casually against his a paper bar napkin and tucked it back in the sheath hidden in his pocket. “Talk about Cas again,” he said pleasantly, balling up the bloodied paper and dropping it next to his glass on the bar top, “and I’ll turn you inside out.”

He fucking had limits, after all.

The thing about Michael, Dean learned quickly, was that he was not a people person. Er…angel. And Dean didn’t mean that the archangel was unfriendly, although he was without a doubt a complete dick. No, it was that Michael simply didn’t…get people. He didn’t understand their motivations, or their complexities. He would ask Dean, early on, about the proper things to say to a human to sway them to his side. Like there was a manual every human was born with, and he need only ask for a copy. He’d asked about the angel Anael as though he and Dean were two colleagues, still working side by side. He’d asked before he’d tortured. Before he’d taken.

He’d asked because Michael truly was baffled. That fundamental lack of understanding would be how they would win, Dean often thought. He stewed over the problem in the prison Michael had built for him in his own mind.

“You think in black and white,” he muttered as he leaned over the lock in his hands. By concentrating very hard, he was able to manifest a version of the lock Michael placed over his latest trap for Dean. With a physical representation in hand, it felt easier now to pick at it and worry at it like a mouse nibbling away at a wall.

Michael had ranted to him early on about “fallen things,” which Dean had come to realize encompassed all of creation - humans, demons, surviving angels - you name it. For Michael, there was a high state and a low state, and nothing in between. “You don’t understand want or need or…or love. Just words.” He pushed the pin in and heard a click. “Just weapons.”

Encouraged, he kept on with it. “We have dreams. Desires. Hopes. We care about each other. We want fucking peace, you asshole.” Another tumbler clicked and Dean smiled. “And I’m not gonna let you ruin that.”

He’d thought for a while that Michael would try to batter down the walls of Heaven and take dominion of the place. The archangel enjoyed worship, thrived on it even. Michael had been bitterly disappointed by the impressions of angels in Dean’s mind, however. He’d been even more disappointed by his meeting with Anael, the supposed rebel fighting against Heaven.

If there was any rebel against Heaven slumming it on Earth, it was Cas, though. But Dean kept Castiel wrapped up firmly in his mind. Ever since Michael had taken over, pushed Dean down, Dean had dragged as much as he could from his memories of his loved ones down with him and pushed it into the dark corners of his mind.

Dean chewed on his lip as he worked at the lock. There were a lot of dark corners in his mind. Corners filled with pain that kept Michael at bay, as effective as insect repellant. It was almost laughably easy to bury his heart away from Michael.

Dean remembered the last time he saw Cas, after Michael had entered his body. He’d been filled with power, with fire so heady it had taken all of his control to hold fast to the reigns and not slip away like a paper boat in a flood.

Castiel had stared at him, jaw clenched, and anguish painted across the lines of his face. Dean had noticed that first and then he’d seen him through Michael’s eyes. Power streamed off of Castiel like holy fire, constant and blue-hot. His wings hung from his shoulders in tattered pieces, mere fragments of what they once were before Metatron’s spell shredded them.

Dean had never seen any sight more beautiful. Castiel - glowing with his own glory. Castiel - broken once, twice, over and over again. Broken, but never giving up. Never. And he still looked at Dean like he believed in him.

Dean remembered how he had failed in Hell, so many years ago. How he’d cracked under torture, given up. Castiel had saved him then and the memory of him would save him now.

He would push back against the walls, the locks, the pain that burned him with every second of contact with Michael’s grace. Dean worked at the lock.

He vowed to fight, because he couldn’t stand the idea of backing down again. Of giving up. And most of all, he couldn’t stand the thought of letting Castiel down. Again.

The thing was, he felt like Cas was with him. Not just the memory of him, but him. There, and steady beside him. Inside him. Dean shook his head. It didn’t make sense, but he was tired of trying to sort things into real and fake in his mind, of all places. He wrapped himself around Cas, or Cas wrapped himself around Dean.

The lock clicked open and Dean gathered himself, pulled his heart around him like armor. He picked up the lock and watched it grow long and sharp in his hand. “Heeeeeere’s Johnny,” Dean shouted and felt Michael flinch like a tiger in the wild at the call of something wilder.

Leaping from his cell, Dean began to slice.

Castiel cleaned the blood from his face grimly with a sandpaper textured washrag. He wished somebody had told him just how rough he looked before he’d gone to speak to Jack. Telling Jack he would be okay without his grace to back him up would have been a shade better delivered if Castiel hadn’t looked like he’d just received the beating of a lifetime.

He sighed and scrubbed the blood from his skin, rinsing the rag under running water and watching the red blood swirl in the basin, then down the drain.

Even as a human, he’d never felt more mortal. He supposed that happened to everyone. The more people you cared about, the more you realized how tenuous everyone’s hold on life and happiness was. It was hard to keep up, some days, without feeling hopelessness crystalizing into something sharp and impenetrable.

The cut in his lip was beginning to heal, but Castiel still hissed involuntarily as he scrubbed at it. It stung.

The cut stung and Castiel was…he was…

Castiel pressed his hands to the sides of the sink and leaned against it for a moment. The porcelain was very cold. He watched the bloody water droplets run towards the drain. He stood there for a breath. Two. Three. Then he lifted his head again, resolutely.

Dean was out there.

Castiel finished washing his face. He wet one hand and combed it through his hair, pushing out the blood and laying it flat again. Dean was out there, burning within Michael. He would feel it if Dean were gone, wouldn’t he?

He would.

In his millennia of life, Castiel had watched many things die, and many more things cease to be entirely. He should be inured to it. But he wasn’t. And he wouldn’t let himself become that way. He’d keep the faith that Dean survived, that he cared to survive.

Castiel finished brushing his hand through his hair and let his grace shudder through his shattered wings, flicking the last of the fight’s grime from him. He was a fallen thing, more human than angel these days. But maybe that was a good thing. Maybe, that human side of him helped him to believe, when everything seemed stacked against him.

He was fallen, but he was not low.

In the end, Castiel believed Dean would be saved.

And so, he thought, flicking off the light in his room and heading back towards the library, he will.

[lymricks]

76. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.” for @allegra-dreams <3 It’s a rock that fucking does it, finally. Billy’s toe catches on a rock as they’re running, and they’ve been running for what feels like hours and he isn’t tired at all, feels like he could run all night, might have to, but his toe catches on a rock and Billy goes down on all fours with a howl and he just--he just can’t get back up.

It’s been a long fucking night. A blur, mostly, of swinging his fucking crowbar through the air, through the skulls of fucked up monsters, and he could have kept going, he swears he could’ve, but the fucking rock.

“Billy!” Steve’s voice is sharp, but the tone is low. They don’t want to get found. He’s got a bandana tied around his upper arm. He’d been bleeding. Billy had stopped the bleeding because it had seemed like a lot of bleeding for one arm. “Get up,” Steve hisses at him, stumbling back to his side. “We have to fucking go!”

The kids are all staring at them and Billy can’t look at Max. He can’t fucking do it. “I can’t,” Billy says. “You need to keep moving.”

“What? Yeah, ok. That’s a no,” Steve says. “Come on, man. We don’t have time for this.”

Billy knows exactly what did it, and if he’s honest, it wasn’t the fucking rock. It was the thing that went for Steve, the one who took the bite out of his shoulder. Billy had been on the other side of a fence when it happened, when Steve had cried out and the kids had screamed. Billy had been on the other side of a fence, but he’d turned around and one of those things had latched itself onto Steve’s arm and Steve was on the ground, and Billy hadn’t hesitated, hadn’t had a second thought, had vaulted the fence, screaming, swearing, had torn it off of Steve.

Had killed it. Super fucking dead. It’s just that it had taken a bite out of him, too. And now Billy’s tripped over a rock and he can’t get back up and the kids and Steve need to keep moving.

“You,” Billy says, voice low, “Need to keep fucking moving.”

It would have killed Steve. It would have eaten him. Billy had fucked up Steve’s face not too long ago, but he doesn’t want Steve to get eaten. Actually, he the opposite of wants that, but only Steve knows and anyway it isn’t an option. The kids are safe, at least. It would have eaten them, too, once it had finished Steve off. Billy had had a choice, sure, and he’d made it. And then he’d tripped over a fucking rock. And now he can’t get up.

“We’re not leaving without you,” Steve says. “What’s wrong? Get the fuck up, Billy!” and he sounds pissed, but Billy can hear the low thread of panic in his voice. “Get the fuck up.”

“Harrington,” Billy says, and his voice is loud. “You’re not fucking hearing me. You. Need. To. Keep. Moving.”

You need to leave me here, he means.

He doesn’t want to look at Steve when he says it, but the other option is Max, and Billy can’t look at her either. “What’s going on?” she says. “We need to run! They’re coming!”

Steve is still crouched down next to where Billy is doubled over on the ground. “Billy,” Steve says. “Get up.”

Billy shakes his head. “I can’t,” he says softly. “Steve. I can’t.”

“No,” Steve says. “Sorry. That’s not a fucking option.” He hooks his fingers under Billy’s arms and lifts, but he hisses in pain from the bite out of his arm and they don’t get far. They land with Steve sitting on his heels, Billy leaning into him, both of them breathing hard. Steve tries to shift his grip, to get his arm around Billy’s waist. Billy can’t help the sharp, pained sound that he makes. He’s looking at Steve’s face when he finally sees the blood. “Billy,” Steve says. “Holy shit. Why didn’t you--”

“You need to keep moving,” Billy says again. “Fuck. Steve, you need to keep moving.”

Steve’s shaking his head. It’s making Billy a little dizzy to look at it. There are black spots dancing behind his vision. “Run,” Billy says.

Steve falls back on his ass and tugs Billy into his lap. Billy’s head lulls a little against Steve’s shoulder. This is the opposite of what he wanted, but in the cold night air, in the crunch of frost, Steve’s chest is an impossibly warm pillow. Billy feels his eyes start to close.

“Billy?” Max says.

Steve cuts her off. “You need to run. Get to Hopper’s. Don’t stop until the door is boarded up behind you.”

“What about you?” Dustin asks. Billy thinks his voice sounds small. Steve smells good, Billy thinks. He wants to lick him. He’s so tired.

“We’re going to be fine,” Steve says. “Run. Seriously, right fucking now, shitheads.”

Billy hears them leave. It’s so dark. “It’s dark,” he says.

“Your eyes are closed, asshole. Open them.”

In the distance, Billy can hear the sound of monsters coming. “You need to run,” he says. He doesn’t open his eyes. Steve is going to get eaten if he stays. Steve is so fucking warm.

“It’s all right,” Steve says. “Open your eyes for me, Billy. Come on.”

That’s just another addition to the list of things Steve’s asking of him that Billy can’t do. Get up, be my boyfriend, open your eyes. Billy can’t do any of those things. Billy shakes his head, feels Steve’s hand framing his face. Feels Steve’s lips against his own, gentle. Billy loves him so fucking much, but he can’t open his eyes or get up or be his boyfriend and he’s sorry, but at least Steve didn’t get eaten. At least the kids got away.

He’s sorry.

He kisses Steve back until it’s too much to hold his head up, until it’s easier to just rest against him. The monsters are coming. Steve needs to fucking run. “Billy,” Steve says. “Baby, you need to wake up.”

Billy wants to, but he can’t. It’s the stupid fucking rock. It’s the bite out of his side. He can feel his own blood down his ribs and stomach, sticky and warm. He wants to tell Steve that he isn’t sleeping, just resting his eyes, but he can’t do that either. “Please,” Steve whispers. Billy can feel his breath against his temple. “I can’t fucking do this without you.”

Billy is so fucking sorry. “Run,” he says, because they’re coming. He can hear them getting so much closer. Talking feels like a lot of work. He wants to say he’s sorry, he wants to say I love you, but as important as those are, they don’t matter as much as: “Run!”

He doesn’t know if Steve runs. It’s the stupid fucking rock’s fault. Billy is so tired. He adds stay awake to the list of things Steve wants that he can’t do. Billy lets the darkness swallow him whole.

~

“Steve!” Max’s voice is so fucking loud. Billy’s going to murder her. He has the worst hangover of his life and he’s going to murder her. “Steve! He’s awake!”

When Billy’s vision clears enough for him to see, he’s met with Max’s angry, tight expression. “Asshole!” she yells at him, which is not helping his fucking headache. “You stupid fucking asshole! You’re not supposed to--you can’t just--you were hurt!”

She smacks his shoulder and Billy winces. It’s around then that he remembers it isn’t a hangover. “Fuck,” he says.

There’s the sound of a door opening, footsteps. Max smacks his shoulder one more time before she turns on her heel, her hair fanning out behind her. He hears her leave. “Billy?”

Relief floods Billy because Steve’s not dead, because he’s not dead, because neither of them got eaten. He tries to sit up, but it hurts too much. Steve’s there, then, a warm hand on his shoulder, big brown eyes all Billy can see.

“You dumb asshole,” Steve says.

“A lot of people are calling me an asshole,” Billy says, surprised by how hoarse his voice sounds, “For saving them.”

“God, fuck you, seriously. You should have said something,” Steve says. He looks so sad.

“I can open my eyes now,” Billy says.

“Obviously.”

“I can get up. Well, not now, but probably soon.”

“That’s what Joyce said.”

“I can even stay awake.”

“Yeah,” Steve says. “Are you losing your mind? What the fuck is happening right now?”

That, Billy thinks, is everything on the list except one last item. “I can be your boyfriend,” he says. “I love you,” he adds.

Steve gapes at him. “You fucking asshole,” he says, but it loses some of its sting when he kisses Billy again. Billy thinks Steve might be crying, his voice sounds a little choked up. “I love you too. I’m going to fucking kill you if you do that again. You asshole.” And he’s definitely crying, but he’s also smiling against Billy’s mouth.

Billy hates that stupid fucking rock just a little bit less.

[automatismoateo]

URGENT - Have an unavoidable meeting in a few hours and need advice via /r/atheism

Submitted April 23, 2021 at 02:53PM by Rich_Recognition_127 (Via reddit https://ift.tt/3sFXzE1) URGENT - Have an unavoidable meeting in a few hours and need advice

DISCLAIMER: This is really blowing up faster than I can reply to it with other IRL obligations. Thanks a ton for the advice and I'm sorry I can't reply to you all.

Additionally, I'm being accused of being... something? just because I don't have time to individually reply to everybody. The nature of the meeting is a meeting with my parents. Also, I have no idea why some of you are suggesting advice should be refused because this is a new account. If I'm some super secret Jeebus spy, isn't that all the more reason to reply to a post titled "Hey please help me show why Jeebus is bullshit"? Ridiculous. Thanks to everyone who is taking this seriously.

Long story short, I'm going to have an unavoidable meeting in a few hours where I have to reveal I don't believe in Christianity. I'm trying to check all my bases to properly make my case, and I'd appreciate some advice.

I appreciate the advice you guys. I REALLY need your help with fact-checking and proof-reading my arguments

I already plan to start with the famous Epicurus quote. If you aren't familiar, here you go:

Evil exists

If God is willing to prevent evil but can't, then he isn't all-powerful. Therefore Bible is false.

If he's able but not willing, then he isn't all-loving and he's evil. Therefore Bible is false.

If he's able and willing, Therefore Bible is false because evil still clearly exists.

If he's not able and not willing, God's not really much of a God at this point.

So after this, I plan to go the "scientific" route and I'd appreciate some additional help here with examples, but:

Name your Biblical artifact of choice, and it's mysteriously been lost. AFAIK, we still have no idea where the Noah's Ark is, the Ark of the Covenant, Holy Grail, any of Moses' crap, etc. etc. Please correct me on these if I'm wrong or add to it.

The most mind-blowing event in the Bible is a massive worldwide flood which would require on the lowest estimates I've seen at least 250% of the water in existance. We still have absolutely zero evidence for this anywhere on the Earth. Nothing in ice cores, nothing in erosion over time, nothing in sediment samples, nothing on the mountains, etc.

The Bible repopulates the entire Earth with EXTREMELY heavy incest between a handful of people MULTIPLE times over. We know this is impossible without horrific genetic defects and have even witnessed it in much milder cases in history.

The Bible claims with ludicrous specificness that a whole list of people lived to be 900+ years old. Clearly this is impossible.

(Not as confident on this one) But it's my understanding that Egypt has little record at all of a bunch of Christian slaves, and they don't even think religious slaves built the Pyramids anymore (worker gangs instead)

Desperately need more examples please or corrections to this list

Then we have the "logical" route:

Not sure on the number but the Bible is filled with loads of contradictions on itself down even to simple numbers. "Did so and so have five camels or five hundred?" It can't even get these basic questions right

All the animals of the Earth in pairs of either 2 or 14 supposedly fit on a boat with all of their food for over a year on a boat some degree smaller than the Titanic. I swear I remember reading ~1/4th of the size, but I'll even say 1/2 just to give benefit of the doubt. The amount of excrement alone would kill everyone, and frankly there are a million problems with this. Where did the food for a year fit? What about parasites and mosquitos, brain eating worms, etc etc

Prayer flat out doesn't work. Faster to just have you all click here

God literally covers Abraham's ass while he screws over two separate important people in the early Bible by lying. God has no problem with this and punishes the hell out of the victims of Abraham's lying, then Abraham gets rewarded

I'm running out of time and I think you all get the jist. I'm going to go ahead and post so I can get as much feedback as possible. Thank you all.

EDITS LIST:

You'll have to forgive me for being so scatterbrained today. Completely forgot (just like God!) about the whole WikiHow "How to Enslave Your Neighbors" passage, womens' rights are shameful, God cursing fig trees and banning polyester/cotton fabric while forgetting about slavery etc., bears murdering children who laughed at a bald dude, etc.

EDIT TWO: Forgot that the Ten Commandments aren't even the real Ten Commandments. God gave Moses different Ten Commandments, that's the only time "ten commandments" is said in the Bible IIRC, and the REAL Ten Commandments were the ones actually put into the Ark of the Covenant Please correct me if I'm wrong

EDIT THREE: God's Plan. Bible clearly states God has preplanned everything from forever ago down to every minute detail. Therefore, he pre-selects who will go to heaven and who will not despite "loving everyone". If God is hypothetically real, then everyone is blameless for their actions IRL because they are God's puppet. God himself intricately planned each and every atrocity committed by man and clearly has no intentions of stopping. God himself has planned every sin every individual would do, and is happy to punish the individual for the rest of time over the crime God planned them to do from the beginning of time