#please do not let me near a 40 ever again

[rapplet]

happy 18th to me (actually it was two days ago, but first i was drunk, and then i was sleeping the hungover off so). sorry i wasn't posting much but i'm kinda in the middle of writing a fanfic and my attention span is shit (all credit goes to ADHD) so yeah i'll try to be more active here when im done with it.

also i would like to thank all my friends, that are reading this, for what they did for my brithday. you guys should not be let unsupervised. but seriously, thank you, it was the most fucked up birthday i've ever had and im ready to be a very (ir)responsible adult now.

[lolapiastri]

happy new year | l. norris

warnings: smut, whole lotta smut, everyone gets head, dirty talk, lando won't shut the fuck up, spitting lol, praise, don’t really know what’s going on half the time

authors note: found this in my drafts from december please enjoy x

31st december 2022, monaco - 11:54pm

“come on mate, get another drink down you,” max fewtrell handed his best friend a jagerbomb, his spare hand resting on landos shoulder, his drunken self unable to stand properly.

lando smiled slightly, before taking the drink and shotting it in one. it had been a few days since him and his girlfriend broke up, and he wasn’t anywhere near over her yet. he didn’t know if he ever would be, judging by how he felt right now. he wanted to be at home, bottle of some 40% spirit in hand and trying to forget.

max wouldn’t let that happen though, forcing him out tonight so he finally left the confinement of his apartment, hoping that the party scene would alleviate some of the stress on landos shoulder.

“come on, there’s so many fit girls here, take your pick,” he slurred, before being pulled away by his girlfriend for the traditional new years kiss.

lando hadn’t realised it was almost midnight, and suddenly he felt his stomach drop at the reminder that last year he was doing this with his ex. he grabbed another drink from the bar and got it down him quickly, planning on sitting at the bar while everyone around him spend the next few minutes with their loved ones.

until he saw you.

his eyes were glued to you the moment he saw you, stuck on how the short red dress you were wearing clung to your curves, stuck on how your hair tumbled over your bare shoulders, stuck on how the sparkly eyeshadow glistened under the neon lights or the club and lit up your whole face.

you made eye contact was you turned towards the bar, and obviously he caught your fancy, with a black button up that pronounced his muscles more than usual, a chain around his neck, and his hair in defined dark curls that contrasted his tanned skin. he looked almost like an angel descended from the heavens, except an angel would never have such a sorrowed look upon their face.

he beckoned you over with a flick of his fingers, eyes never leaving your body, and you may have been upset if you weren’t as gone as you were. you settled yourself in between his legs, taking the half drank glass from his hand and finishing it off for him, leaving a faint red mark on the rim.

he was infatuated at first glance. his hands settled in the dip of your waist, almost engulfing your body with their size. his mouth slowly curved into a smirk as he watched you lean over him to place the now empty glass on the bar, allowing him a small look at your lace bra you were wearing under your dress.

he checked the time on the clock. 11:57.

“what’s your name, gorgeous?” he asked, thumbs drawing lazy circles against the fabric of your dress.

you told him your name, before then asking for his, and his eyes widened with the realisation that you didn’t know who he was, or you were too drunk to realise.

“lando,” he smiled softly, voice deep and husky.

11:58.

“you here with anyone?” he asked, eyes dropping down to your red-stained lips before meeting your eyes again, the actions so quick you could barely recognise it happening.

you shook your head. “well, my friend, but she’s here with her boyfriend so…”

“i’m in the same boat,” he chuckled softly, subconsciously pulling you closer and closer towards him, so your thighs were brushing against his, “my mate max is here but he’s ran off with his girlfriend now.”

“god i hate people in couples,” you laughed, receiving one in return from lando, “they act all in love with no regard for those of us who are single.”

11:59.

“tell me about it,” lando rolled his eyes, his hand slowly climbing up your body so they were now resting against your rib cage.

you looped your arms around him, hands settling in the nape of his neck, a finger wrapping around a loose curl in his hair. he stood up now, looking down on you, and leant down so your faces were mere centimetres apart.

“you know it’s almost midnight,” he whispered in your ear, breath warm against your skin.

you hummed in response, feeling your heart beat doubly as fast against your ribs, the air suddenly feeling so much warmer.

“and i don’t have anyone to kiss.” as the final word left his mouth his lips attached to your neck, soft under ear, leaving a sloppy kiss that made you want more, want so much more.

“i don’t have anyone either,” you almost whispered, scared you had the wrong impression, but of course you didn’t.

chants of people in the background took you out of your little bubble, as the familiar ‘ten, nine, eight,’ sounded through the club.

lando leant right in, so your lips were practically touching already. “can i kiss you?”

you nodded just as the clock struck midnight, and his lips crashed into yours, with a sense of lust that you hadn’t felt in far too long.

the kiss was wet, it was sloppy, but it was desperate and needy and it sent a shiver through your body down to your core. your hands buried themselves in his hair, pulling against his roots and causing him to groan into the kiss, allowing him to stick his tongue in and control the kiss.

your tongues moved in harmony as his hands ran down the lengths of your body, as if he was scared this would be the last time he could touch you, the last time he could feel you under his fingertips. they eventually settled against your ass, cupping it lightly as he pushed your hips against his, so you could feel his semi through his jeans.

you wanted to kiss him forever, wanted all of him all at once. you decided that if the world ended now, you would be happy to die here and now, in landos embrace, his lips pressed against yours.

he pulled away, but only for his lips to find your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses until he found that sweet spot, the spot that made your neck roll back, giving him more access to suck against your skin, undoubtably leaving deep purple marks wherever he went.

your hands detached themselves from his hair and instead you dragged them down his body, fingers spaced out as you passed his pecs, passed his abs (though you were very tempted to linger there), and finished at the waistband of his jeans, dipping an index finger inside to trace the elastic of his boxers.

you felt him groan against your skin, pulling away to give you a look as if to say ‘really? in public?’. deciding to play it innocent, you just beat your eyelashes at him, a confused look on your face, and slowly ventured lower and lower.

lando wasn’t having any of that, however, grabbing your wrists easily in one hand and dragging you over to the door, pulling his phone out to call a taxi. you tried to kiss him again, but he just tutted, with a dangerous glint in his eye that told you you were in for it when you got back to his.

the taxi arrived sooner rather than later, and lando made an effort to sit in the front, leaving you in the back alone. you were confused, wondering where the sudden coldness had come from, wondering if you had pushed it too far. but when he turned around midway through the journey, and mouthed ‘behave now, and i’ll be nice later’, you knew it was going to be a fun night.

you quickly sent your friend a text to let her know you were okay, not that she would read it for another few hours, before deliberating whether or not to behave. on the one hand, behaving means that you wouldn’t piss lando off and that he’ll ‘be nice’ later, whatever that meant. but one the other hand, you kind of wanted to push his buttons, see what you could get him to do. which is why you decided to call your friend and stir up some trouble.

“hey bitch!” you practically sang into the phone, the drunkenness being more apparent than ever. you could see lando in the rear view mirror, and watched as his face seemed confused, but not upset.

“hey!” she slurred back, as drunk as you were, “where the fuck are you?”

“i’m with this guy,” you smirked to yourself as you started your plan, “but i can’t lie, he just doesn’t seem all that you know. like he seems like he’s all talk and he won’t deliver.”

lando raised an eyebrow at that, but still didn’t say or do anything, thought you could tell he was definitely listening in now.

“then why are you going with him?” your friend asked, and you could faintly here the music of the club in the background.

you hummed into the phone, but loud enough for lando to hear as well. “don’t know, maybe i just feel bad for him. he just doesn’t seem like he knows how to fuck, you get what i’m saying?”

lando’s fist clenched at that comment, but he still kept his cool, at least from the outside.

“like, i don’t know, he just doesn��t seem like he knows how to make me cum.”

that particular comment must have hit a nerve because lando leant back and grabbed the phone from your hand. you pouted and lazily attempted to grab it back, but really you were glad you were able to rile him up.

he quickly spoke to your friend, telling her you were okay and where you were going, before hanging up and ignoring your pleas for your phone.

it was only a few more minutes before you were back at lando’s flat, and he still ignored you while he paid the driver and guided you up the stairs, other than a link through your arm to make sure you didn’t fall. you liked the fact that he was still a gentleman, even though it seemed like he was about to not be.

“lando-” you whined as you waited outside his apartment, watching him unlock the door, but he cut you off before you could say anything else.

“what did i tell you?” he asked, voice still and stern, not facing you at all.

you tried to grab his wrist to get him to face you but he resisted. “to behave.”

“and you didn’t behave, did you?” his voice was almost patronising, but it was deep and rough and so fucking sexy that you didn’t care. “so now, i have to show you that what you were saying to your friend isn’t true. unless you’re going to apologise and tell me you didn’t mean it?”

he was giving you a chance to back down, to take the easy route. but it was new year’s day and you were never going to see him again, so you decided to have some fun.

“i don’t know what to tell you, you just don’t seem like you could make a girl cum,” you played it like you didn’t care, when your heart was racing knowing that something good was coming next.

he finally opened the door to his apartment and picked you up, your legs naturally looping around his waist as he pulled you into a rough kiss. it wasn’t like the one earlier, where even though it was rough there was a sweetness behind it, but instead this was pure lust and need in a kiss. his tongue explored every part of your mouth, at a ferocity that you felt like you were on fire, and that no bucket of water could ever pull you out.

his hands settled under your ass, kneading the skin under the silk of your dress. your hands found his shoulders, broad and wide, and you needed them stabilise as your world was spinning around you.

he carried you through his apartment, with you getting a brief look before he threw you onto his bed, leaving you looking up at him with rosy cheeks and lust-hazed eyes.

in the light he looked majestic, with two dimmed lamps either side of you projecting warm orange hues onto his face. fuck, he was gorgeous, chiseled by the gods themselves, and as he undid the buttons on his shirt and rolled up his sleeves, your mouth almost started to water at how beautiful he looked.

you pulled yourself up, going to try and finish undoing the buttons to take his top off, but he stopped you, once again capturing your wrists but this time pinning them behind your back.

“you don’t get to touch if you misbehave, baby,” he said, fake-pity written all across his face.

his other hand pulled your dress off your shoulders, and he let go of your hands for just a moment to remove it from the rest of your body. your heels were next, as he undid them slowly and carefully, taking his time to admire you, watching as your patience was running out.

left in just your lacy red lingerie, you watched as he climbed back over you, obvious hard on that he ignored as his lips met yours in another kiss. it wasn’t quite like the other one, slightly softer, as if he was checking that you were okay with all this. and of course you were.

he pulled away. “i can’t make you cum, yeah?”

“that’s what i said, isn’t it?” you teased back, tilting your head while trying to catch your breath.

“well, i guess you won’t be coming tonight then,” he almost sighed, before diving into the crook of your neck and leaving harsh, aggressive kisses wherever he could, adding to the deep purple marks he caused earlier on.

he slowly made his way down your neck, before finally making it to the valley of your breasts, where he sucked harder than before, obviously trying to deepen the colour and add to your pleasure. his hands found your breasts, taking one in each and kneading them, a soft massage that felt better than it ever should have done. was it the alcohol? or was it him?

he pulled your right boob out of your bra, eyes widening as his index finger and thumb took your nipple in between them and started to roll it gently. you arched your back in reponse, a weak moan falling from your lips, which pushed your breast into his fingers more. his other hand pulled out your other breast, but instead of his fingers his lips attached to it, and your mouth parted subconsciously as a wave of pleasure washed over you.

god, he was good. and he knew he was good judging by the smirk on his face. you almost regretted not letting him pleasure you how he was planning to.

almost.

“fuck, lando,” you let out a breathy whine as he swapped over, both of your nipples having an overwhelming sense of pleasure, “look so pretty sucking my tits.”

you could tell he liked that, as a vibration shook through your body when he moaned against your skin. he pulled away, much to your dismay, but you stopped minding as he slowly made his way down your body, still leaving the open mouthed kisses as he reached your belly button.

“you know,” he almost panted, hands still fixed on your tits, “i was gonna make you feel so fucking good.”

one hand leaves your nipple, a cool trail down your stomach before it settles at your waistband, mimicking your actions from in the club. your hips buck against his hand, causing him to chuckle slightly, as you crave more and more and more of his touch’s

“i was gonna make you come on my tongue, it would have felt so fucking good,” his sultry voice was working wonders as his fingertips traced the patterns in the lace, “would have had you screaming my name as i sucked your clit, would have felt fucking euphoric.”

even his words made you feel something, made you feel like any moment now you were about to combust. one finger trailed down your panties, feather light over where you needed him the most, but with the lace barrier in the way.

“god, you’ve ruined these, huh?” he chuckled, feeling how your wetness had soaked through your underwear. “so fucking wet and all i’ve touched are your tits. so responsive for me.”

you wanted to talk back, wanted to have some bite to you, spur him on even more, but you couldn’t conjure up anything while he left soft kisses on your inner thighs.

“still want my mouth, baby?” his voice was sickly sweet, but the tone behind it was cruel and teasing, because obviously you still wanted his mouth.

you nodded as best as you could, but he shook his head a response, a ‘tut tut tut’ leaving his mouth.

“need words, darling,” he almost sang, “or else you’re not getting anything from me.”

you mustered up every last drop of energy you had and spoke up. “please, lando. i want you.”

“want what?”

it took every fibre in your body to not tell him to fuck off there and then. you wanted to, you really wanted to, but you also wanted him. and that want won.

“want your mouth on me, please, lando.”

and that was enough for him, as he pulled down your lace panties and finally revealed your pussy to him.

“fuck me, darling,” his finger trailed over your folds, feather light, as he took in the sight of it, “you’re glistening, look, you’re dripping out.”

you would have felt embarrassed, but the dutch courage must have taken over. “not used to seeing a girl so wet, huh?”

his tongue poked his cheek. “easy, pretty girl. let me make you feel good.”

he gently blew over you, making you squirm slightly, before he dived straight in and began sucking your clit. the pleasure was instant, your hips bucking into his face as he chuckled against you, sending waves of pleasure through your entire body. everything he had made you feel up to this point was microscopic compared to the pleasure you felt now.

it only grew when he slid two fingers into your pussy, curling them up at hitting that spot inside of you, looking over as your face contorted in pleasure, eyes closed, mouth hung open, he thought you looked like the prettiest girl in the world.

you were already close, no idea how as you hadn’t been going for that long. but the mix of his fingers in your cunt and his mouth on your clit was bringing you to the edge.

“i- i’m close, lando,” you stuttered, speaking hard when so much pleasure was coarsing through your veins.

he tilted his head slightly. “you’re close did you say?”

you nodded, feeling your orgasm approaching faster and faster, you could already feel it happening now. to add to everything, his fingers somehow reached deeper inside of you, contorting in a way where everything was just so fucking good.

“i wait,” he let out a soft, fake laugh, “i forgot. i can’t make you cum.”

and with that he pulled away, leaving you recovering from a high you never even got. you had to take a minute, your body feeling worse than ever as the euphoria slowly went away, and the lack of human touch was getting to you.

“what’s wrong, baby?” he faked pity, reaching down to swipe his thumb across your cheekbone. “you weren’t expecting to finish, not according to what you said in the car.”

you slowly opened your eyes, seeing his gorgeous face looking down on you, and fighting the urge to throw a punch. you subconsciously leaned into his touch, craving it despite the atrocity he just performed, and watched as he undid his belt with his other hand.

“here’s the deal,” he pulled away, leaving you with a whine, before unbuttoning his shirt and taking it all off, allowing you to see his abs for the first time that night. “you’re gonna suck me off, and if you do a good job, then, and only then, do you get to cum. understand, darling?”

you nodded. secretly, you wanted to suck him off anyway, and with this deal you would get to come as well. he took a step back from the bed, tapping his foot against the floor as a gesture for you to come down. you couldn’t understand though, brain slightly fucked from the shortly lived pleasure, and instead looked at him confusedly.

“get on your knees for me, baby,” he cooed, and you did as he said, sinking onto his wooden floor and looking up at him, waiting for his next order. with the promise of an orgasm at the other end, at this point you would do anything to get to the prize.

he started to unzip his jeans, and as you went to help, he instantly took a step back. “hands behind your back, no touching remember?”

you poured, but did as he said, linking for fingers behind your back as you waited for him to get ready. he pulled his boxers down, and jesus christ were you not ready.

he looked big through his hard on in his jeans, but you were not ready for all that. you could tell you were shocking your shock through your face, and he let out a soft chuckle and grabbed your chin with his right hand.

“think you can take it?” he asked, holding it with his other hand as he kept your eyes on it, watching as your mouth suddenly seemed to water.

you nodded. “mhm. just wanna make you feel good, baby. that’s all i want.”

he smiled down at you. “give me a kiss.”

you tried to climb up to kiss his lips, but his hand kept you pressed down, and you understood instantly. you leant forward to press your mouth against his dick, kissing the tip gently and watching as his head fell back. you left open mouthed kisses all down his length, finished at the base before climbing all the way back to the top. you started leaving kitten licks on the tip, watching the veins in his neck pulsate at your actions.

“god, you’re so fucking good,” he grunted, hand moving from your chin round to the back of your head, nestling in your hair as he started to take control. “you gonna take me all in?”

you hummed against his cock, opening your mouth as he guided you down, controlling your movements as he gently fucked your mouth. you tried your hardest not to move or choke, instead trying to focus on his pleasure.

you couldn’t help your eyes watering though, and when he looked down he obviously felt bad, relaxing a little bit as he let you take more charge.

“look so pretty naked on your knees for me,” he cooed, taking in sharp breaths as your tongue swirled around his tip. “who knew that such a sweet looking girl could give head like this? yeah, keep going, fuck, you’re so fucking good.”

you just kept going, knowing that the more you pleasured him the more likely you were to get pleasure yourself. lando didn’t want to seem selfish, however, as his hand wrapped forward to stroke your cheek again.

“fuck, play with your nipples for me,” he ordered, slightly out of breath, but moaning as you started to play with yourself. he let out a groan as you moaned around his cock, head bobbing like this was your last day on earth. “such pretty tits, should be framed in a museum how good you look right now.”

you could tell he was close by how his breaths got shallower and shallower, and his thrusts into your throat got weaker. he pulled away though, leaving a string of saliva from your mouth to his cock, which you licked up instantly. you went back to kissing his cock, waiting as you squeezed your nipples even harder.

“you were so good, huh, baby?” he picked your naked body up, grabbing your hands and wrapping them round his neck, telling you that you could finally touch him again. “listened to everything i told you to do, such a good girl.”

his praise was music to your ears, and his actions matched the tone of his words. he lay you gently down on the bed, climbing over you as his lips met yours in the softest kiss of the night. it was an ‘are you okay?’ kiss, an ‘i hope i didn’t go too far’ kiss, a ‘you look beautiful’ kiss, and it was possibly your favourite of the night.

“gonna fuck that dripping pussy,” he mumbled into your lips before continuing the kiss, lining his cock up against your entrance, tapping it against your clit purely to watch you squirm with elation.

and as he thrusted into you it was like your world had stopped. fuck, he felt so good inside you, filling you up more than you could have imagined and left you choking on air as inch by inch he entered more and more.

lando felt much the same, obsessed with how you felt clenched around him, how tight you were as he continued in. he waited once his whole dick was in, holding back from setting a rhythm until he was positive you could take it.

“feel so good clenched around me,” he muttered out, leaning back so he could check you were alright, check that you were ready for this, “such a tight little pussy needs to be stretched out.”

you nodded at him, a signal to start moving, and he did as he was told, beginning to thrust in and out of you at such a pace that your mouth flew open in shock. his hands dug into your hips, undoubtably causing marks as he fucked you deep and hard.

the moans emitted from your mouth were ungodly, borderline pornographic, and led to you covering your mouth in embarrassment. lando was having none of that, however, stopping his movements to gaze into your eyes.

“don’t you dare not let me hear those pretty sounds,” he thrust at the end of the sentence, as if to solidify his point, and you allowed yourself to moan, “want all the neighbours to hear how good i’m fucking you.”

you were so close to the edge, once again seeing it in the distance, and you clenched around lando trying to let him know. he chuckled and leant into your shoulder, kissing over the deep marks he’d left earlier, just adding to the euphoria you were feeling.

“gonna cum,” you whined, grabbing one of his hands and guiding it to your clit, needing that final push to make it over the edge.

he understood instantly, rubbing rough circles while sucking against your neck. the pleasure was washing over you in waves, and it wasn’t long until you felt your orgasm rush through your body, every part of you feeling lighter and in a state of happiness you couldn’t remember ever feeling before.

lando kept going, however, chasing his own orgasm, and you decided to help him get thrre, however harsh it was for you. your lips found his neck for the first time, leaving sloppy kisses along his collarbones that were followed by a row of dark purple and red.

“fuck me,” he grunted, thrusts getting sloppier as he got closer and closer to the edge. “gonna pull out, yeah?”

you nodded against his chest, nails tracing over his abs as you rocked your hips in tandem with him, so sensitive that you might even come again.

as he kept thrusting into you, you remembered how much he loved being praised earlier, and thought that might help get him over the edge.

“being so good, fucking me so well lando,” you sighed, whispering into his ear as you kissed up his neck.

you felt his thrusts stutter with your words, obviously having a positive impact as a blush rose to his cheeks. his hands gripped even harder around your hips, and you began to feel another orgasm coming.

“such a pretty boy, so so pretty, look so good and fuck me so good,” you kept going, your hands leaving him and instead finding your clit. “got the prettiest dick as well, feels so good all wrapped inside me.”

“fuck-” he choked out, before pulling out and finishing all over his chest.

he panted while you got yourself to finish, cumming over your fingers. you threw your head back against the pillow, watching your chest as it rose and fell, trying to catch your breath.

lando joined you, lying across the bed while pulling himself together. you decided you weren’t finished, however, crawling over on top of him and licking his cum off of his abs, making sure to get every last drop off. his hands tangled themselves as you finished, pulling you up to him so he could kiss you again, making out like teenagers as you just enjoyed each others company.

“so,” lando finally broke the silence as he pulled away from the kiss, “i did make you cum.”

you shrugged as you rolled back to the side of him. “was it more fun that i challenged you?”

“definitely. never known someone so responsive to some dirty talk,” he jested, earning a slap on his bicep.

“never known someone love to be praised so much,” you retaliated, shutting him up as he went to grab you a glass of water.

he returned quickly, along with some boxers for him and a baggy t-shirt for you. you noticed the t-shirt it had ‘mclaren’ across it, and you hummed for his attention as you threw it on.

“you like cars then?” you asked, not expecting him to laugh in reponse.

“yeah, you could say that.”

you tilted your head in confusion, but decided you were too tired to understand whatever was going on. “you don’t mind me staying the night?”

“not at all.”

“you gonna tell me why that was so funny in the morning?” you asked, knowing it would be your last question before you drifted off to sleep.

he hummed. “of course. happy new year.”

“happy new year.”

[that-student-that-has-homework]

Portgas D. Ace Headcanons 01

Excuse me Oda-sensei, but that 40 year old Ace is simply criminal. Thank you so much for blessing us with him

Anyway! Have some Husband!Ace headcanons For more Ace content please head to my Tumblr MasterList

Ace is, respectfully, a huge simp for his wife

To the extent that the Whitebeard crew straight up jokingly awarded him with a “Biggest Wife Simp” Award

They made it look official and had Whitebeard sign it and everything. There's even a stamp.

Ace has it framed and hung proudly on the wall next to your bachelor’s degree / college diploma / degree in general. 

I feel like despite his own personal insecurities, Ace still manages to be an amazing father

I imagine Ace originally setting out for like one or two kiddos at most (because y'know...what if he's not good enough) and ending up with 3 or 4 kids

Thing is, that’s both your faults.

Ace is tender and goofy with his kids, and he’s so friggin caring: to the extent that…well wouldn’t it be neat to see him with maybe another 2 or 3 kiddos of his own? 

(Your husband is hot okay?)

In his case, he swears you have a unique glow about you when you’re pregnant. But more than that when he sees you with your first born, he suddenly wants a big family with you.

I imagine his kids are an eldest son, then his princess, then the youngest boy who takes after his uncle Luffy.

His kids aren’t parentified. He keeps his issues far, far, away from them. Besides, he’s got you by his side.

He was dedicated to making sure they got as much playtime as possible.

He heard about learning through play, and he is DEDICATED to doing that as much as possible

Ace’s kids are spoiled with affection, but not spoiled brats.

While it’s true he’d give them the world, he’d rather let them go get it themselves. 

For example: when they asked for a tree house, he gave them the greenlight immediately.

But they had to build it themselves.

It was a super fun project lasting a little over two months with the whole family involved.

Oh and the Whitebeard crew helped too.

It took a while to get the design down initially, then the shopping logistics and whatnot (they used a lot of math here - see education via play)

Building the thing took maybe a weekend or two because the Whitebeard Crew and even the Strawhats came over to help

(It was mostly Franky and Usopp doing work, Sanji was cooking with Thatch)

Uncle Luffy was not allowed near the construction zone after an accident.

They almost destroyed the tree house with their partying once

Ace’s kids were not happy and no one was allowed in the backyard for the rest of the night

He makes sure they have proper manners and self-defense skills

You had to help out here, no lie.

He admitted he needed your help, especially after a dinner with Garp where Makino tagged along to see Ace again

He puts all of his kids into martial arts classes

especially his princess - he’s so proud of her when she beats up bullies

He’s not great at discipline though to be honest. He probably goes about it similarly to Garp. 

Ace will not tolerate any of his kids being nasty to their mother. No matter the phase.

You will have to hold him back if you want to let them get their frustration off their chest.

He’ll let them talk, but you’ll have to keep a hand on him somewhere, his arm, his hand, his knee, his shoulder, his back and rub soothing circles

Let’s just say, “talk shit, get hit,” is Ace’s attitude towards anyone being demeaning towards you (more so with adults, not his kids, but that's why they get a scolding)

"Ace my love" (he melts every time you call him that) "the kids’ll start thinking you love me more than them if you do that"

"My kids won’t disrespect their mother though!"

"They’re just venting darling, and when they say or do something that violates my boundaries, I'll be sure to reinforce it. Lead by example right?"

If they ever feel like pissing Ace off for fun they can just say something kinda not nice about you and he'll get mad and they'll flee from him giggling like the little gremlins they are

Ace is veeeeeeeeerry physically affectionate and he isn’t shy about it at all.

At gatherings with the Whitebeard family, he will gladly seat you in his lap, he will happily hug you as you are seated.

His arm is on your waist most of the time.

They tease him to make him tone it down, he does not.

He, in fact, dials it up. Turns up the heat lol.

You have kids? Not in front of them? What do you mean, not in front of the kids? It’s important they know just how much he loves their mama!

So he will continue to be playful with his hugs and kisses and other displays of affection.

It’s nothing too over the top. Just hugs and quick pecks wherever.

Your entire head is fair game for his smooches, your arms (he loves kissing your pulse and then making eye contact, sneaky guy that he is), your shoulders.

Maybe lifting you and spinning you around. Cuddles. Little bites.

He will play-wrestle his kids to “fight” them over getting to cuddle you, and then he’ll just put all his weight on all of you in a group cuddle

Just to let you know, your kids also receive all the warmth and love of his affections.

When his sons are still tiny and adorable, he smooches them all over. The kisses grow less frequent as they grow older, but the hugs do not stop.

Oh no, hugs galore.

Ace still pecks his little princess on her forehead though

When they’re all under ten he’ll wrap them in a hug (after he chased them down and caught them so they’re laughing and screaming) and start smooching their cheeks while they laugh and try to get out of his grasp

Also yes she’s his princess, but that girl has no problem throwing a fully grown man twice her size around, he made sure of it.

I reiterate: Ace is not remotely shy about displays of affection

Like his eldest could have a friend over, and Ace would still launch a full scale hug attack using the rest of his troops (daughter/youngest)

It's complete with screeching, screaming, and a lot of laughter

His kids used to get teased for it, but it didn’t take more than a few conversations for them to instead jeer at the kids that teased them.

"You’re all jealous your parents don’t love you like ours do"

"How sad, your parents don't hug and kiss you"

Their dad, grandpa, uncle - uncles really, are all gremlins - it's in their DNA

The kids are really physically affectionate with each other as a result

Deadass they’ll be kicking the shit out of each other one second and the next they’ll be all cuddled and huddled up playing Mario Kart or something

Ace is his kids’ hero.

His sons aspire to have his level of fitness.

His daughter, when she’s older, uses him as a standard for dating

You're relieved

Ace is touched and a touch nervous, because he is aware of his shortcomings, though he works hard to keep improving

Of course when you look at him, a twinkle in your eyes, and tell him, “I’m so proud of her, I’m so proud of you!” He feels better

When you continue: “if she can find a guy like you, who cherishes her as much as you cherish me, I’d be so happy.”

Ace loves you so much he swears

[satxnsupreme666]

Theatrical love: Agatha Harkness/Agnes x Fem!reader

Masterlist

Requested by: @agathaharkness-simp

Summary: You’re a witch and just like Agatha you feel the power coming from Westview, you meet her there and she asks you to help her, so you pretend to be a married couple in front of Wanda and the others, you start to fall in love without noticing but what happens when Wanda and her child ask you why you never act like a married couple.

Words: 6.8k

Warnings: None, pure romance.

Author’s notes: 

Hi, this was a requested story, I do not know if I should tag the people who requested at the time, I want to be respectful, so I am not sure if I should tag them, I will try and do it since it was their request and their idea and if any of the people who requested back at the time now feel uncomfortable being tagged, please let me know and I will delete the tag.

This was one of the first stories I wrote three years ago, I had posted them on Tumblr on my old account, but due to my mental health, I had to take a break from Tumblr and the toxicity and hate that had suddenly increased, I deleted all of my stories and my old account, now I have decided to upload them again here on Tumblr and also on Ao3.

Again, as this was one of the first stories I wrote for Agatha Harkness is a little bit short, I will be uploading the rest of the stories from time to time, I have to edit them and make sure they are legible enough and with not a lot of grammatical errors.

I hope you like it!

If you enjoy, could you comment, like or reblog? it would help a lot really ♥️Taglist: @eliscannotdance

Being a witch and having a normal boring life was not what you were prepared for.

Years of trying to prove the other witches what you were capable of, that your powers were much more than they thought and that you were more intelligent even though you were young.

You had gained the respect of all of your coven when a bunch of witch-hunters spotted your coven because of an irresponsible witch who had affected the magical field that covered your village, it had been a spell that had gone wrong.

The girl was practicing to have a better control of her magic and while doing a spell, that spell turned wrong, instead of vanishing some books, the magical field disappeared.

You were the first witch who noticed the problem, because something felt off, as soon as you noticed you went straight to tell the other witches but they didn’t believe you, of course you felt angry, this was something important they decided not to believe you?

You sighed in annoyance; how could they be so blind?

You tried to brushed the anger off, you had more important things to take care of.

You waited at the limits for thirty minutes, and when you heard noises you already knew they had arrived.

Finally, some witches a little older than you arrived and they put themselves beside you, all of them were ready to fight against the witch-hunters.

There were at least 40 of them, you knew your village was quite popular between the human population and of course the witch-hunters but still there were a lot of them, even some of them held guns in their hands.

With a flick of your hand all the witch-hunters fell to the ground, their bodies went limp and all of your sisters were surprised and shocked at the same time, because the youngest witch had saved all of them, after that none of them questioned your power ever again, and they put a stronger magical field around the village and this time the witches were not allowed to train near the field that kept your coven away from curious eyes.

Years passed and new witches arrived at the coven you had studied everything you could, from magical potions, protection spells, medicinal herbs to more complex things like illusions and transmutation, you even got to teach the youngest witches and you were happy and proud about it, but after years of doing the same you felt like you needed to do something new, something fresh.

You talked with the witches in charge and you shared your interests with them, they agreed that you could left the coven to look for something different outside the village and if you ever needed help or you wanted to go back, you could always count on them.

Years had passed and now you found yourself smiling at the fresh memories of a long time ago.

You took a deep breath and put your elbows onto the kitchen Island with your face resting in your hands, you were bored, you thought maybe outside your village could be something more interesting but now, you just found yourself doing nothing.

You had a job and it was fine but now you were just feeling bored and kind of lonely, you decided to call it a night so you went to sleep, but for some hours you couldn’t sleep and you were just looking at the celling but after two hours you finally felt yourself falling into your tiredness.

The next day when you woke up, you stirred yourself into your pillows, you wanted to sleep a little bit more and since it was Sunday so you had the day off, but your eyes went wide when you felt something.

You felt a different vibe in the air, it felt far away but at the same time you could feel it calling you, it was something that you couldn’t put your finger on, it was like if something was calling you, you felt attracted to it, it was a power, something strange and you wanted to investigate more, you wanted to know what it was.

After taking a shower and now in different clothes other than your pajamas, you turned the lights off, and sat in the middle of one of your empty rooms, you put some candles on the floor, forming a circle of candles, after that and with a movement of your hand you lit all the candles and sat right in the center of it, closing your ayes you concentrated yourself in the strange power that you felt drawn to, taking some deep breaths and relaxing yourself you started to see pictures in your head, you could see a sign with the words Westview written on it, it was a town and it had a strange magical red filed covering it, it quickly reminded you of the one you coven had, you could feel suffering coming from it and now you felt intrigued, what was that? You opened your eyes and this time you decided you would go to that town.

Walking into your room, you packed just the essential in one of your favorite back-pack and after you decided everything was in order you smiled, this was something different and new, now after a long time you found some type of adventure.

Again, you closed your eyes and focused on the power which felt far away, you moved your hand and the smoke of your magic surrounded you.

This time, when you opened your eyes again you were in front of the Westview sign you saw in your mind, you nodded and satisfied with yourself you walked forward, stopping yourself sensing the strong magic irradiating from the town, it was really strong and it was a different type of magic, one you had never felt, frowning you stepped back, thinking on how you would be able to enter without hurting yourself, you didn’t know what type of spell held with it or the consequences of passing through it, you tried to think of a way to enter and were so focused on your thoughts that you didn’t heard someone walking towards you.

“Well hello there darling, what are you doing here?” You turned your heard to the person whose voice was so soothing and you saw a woman in front of you, with a purple dress, you could field the magic coming from her too and just like that you knew she was a witch too.

“You´re a witch too” You blurted out, she grinned and put one of her fingers onto her face, on her lips, she examined you from head to toes, and you couldn’t help but blushed, she was a beautiful woman and her gazed on you made you feel nervous.

“You´re right sweetheart I´m a witch just as you and the name´s Agatha Harkness darling, may I know what is your name?” She asked getting closer to you and your eyes went wide, she was Agatha Harkness? Every witch knew who she was, the witch who had played with dark magic, you couldn’t believe she was right in front of you, you felt excited, she was like a legend between the young witches, she had the power to absorb someone else´s magic, you just stared at her she was more beautiful in person, more than what you had heard she was, there were entire pages about her in all the books you had read, you felt yourself blushing more now.

“I´m y/n Baudelaire” You wanted to say more but you were lost for words.

“What a pretty name love, so now that I know which is your name, tell me y/n what are you doing here?” She was now so close to you at this point and it was too much for you, you tried to calm yourself to talk to her.

“Well I just felt something, I sensed something strong and I wanted to investigate more, and well now I´m here just as well as you, so I assume you´re here for the same thing, right?”

She smirked before speaking again “You´re right darling, I want to know the source of the power, it was too strong to ignore it, but there´s a problem, I´ve been studying this field and it looks like anyone who enters, they instantly get their mind erased becoming a different person, I already figured out how to enter without being affected but, have you?” There was that smirk again, and well of course you didn´t know how to, and frowned, that would be hard, how did she do it?

Agatha looked at you face, she could feel now how tense you were, she was sure that you weren’t a threat to her, her face softened and she put a hand on your shoulder to drag your attention.

“I know you´re just curious, and you’re a witch too so I will help you enter with one condition” Agatha told you and you nodded enthusiastically, Agatha smiled ad your reaction.

“You will have to help me get to the source and you will help me to recover everything we can, and I won´t let the magic get you, alright? I have a feeling that we will have to be undercover, so you will have to play along with me ok?” She asked you and you nodded excitedly; she was asking for your help! The one and only Agatha Harkness.

“Yes, yes I will do everything you tell me” She laughed a little at your excitement

“Give me your hand, I will make us pass through the magical field darling” You blushed again and you offered her your hand, she took your hand in hers and pulled you against her with a strong grip.

Both of you walked towards the magical field and entered into it, you closed your eyes and you felt a slight force against you but when the feeling went away you opened your eyes again but what you saw shocked you, the entire town was completely just black and white, you blinked several times to make sure it was real what you were seeing, you looked at your hands and your clothes and they still had color so it was something so strange, what was going on?

You turned your head to look at Agatha and she grinned at you, she noticed how confused you were.

“It´s ok darling, do not worry, this is why I told you we would have to play along, everything looks like the 50’s so we will have to dress like those times so nobody suspects a thing” Before you could ask her she made a movement with her hand and her purple smoke covered you, when the smoke went away you looked at her and her outfit had changed for a plaid dress, even her long hair changed into a beach wave haircut, she found you staring at her and winked at you, you quickly took your eyes out of her and blushed furiously.

You noticed you were still holding her hand and you quickly dropped her hand.

“Oh dear don’t be so shy, it´s ok to stare, you look good as well, the style fits you dear” You instantly looked at yourself, you had a vintage polka dot dress and when you touched your hair you noticed you had a pin-up hairstyle with a headband, oh how you wish you had a mirror with you.

“So, what do we do now?” You asked Agatha and you saw her looking around the town, she noticed some people walking by and closed her eyes, after some seconds she opened them again and looked at you

“Now darling we have to go to look for the house we will be staying in” You nodded and started to walk with her.

You passed a neighborhood and the people there were strangely kind towards you, they greeted both of you as if they had always known you, Agatha didn’t seem to be affected by the strange behavior of the inhabitants, she just greeted them as well and smiled at them at the same time she walked, you were amazed by that.

Agatha stopped walking when you arrived at a beautiful two-story house.

“Now darling I have to ask you something, remember I told you there was a chance we had to play along? Well now we will have to, I thinks someone is making all of this, someone created this place but also I think whoever did this, also has the people of this town under some kind of control.” So that was why everyone behaved in a strange way, you nodded and looked at Agatha again

“Well, we will have to pretend to be a married couple, is that alright darling? I need you by my side, your powers can help a lot and in case something wrong could happen I need you to be with me, alright?” She asked you whilst putting her hands on your shoulders in a gentle way, you blushed furiously, you will have to live under the same roof with her, you felt something strange growing inside you but you couldn’t say what it was, you felt your face getting hotter but you managed to say a barely audible “It´s alright”.

Agatha smiled and removed her hands off you.

“Now darling we will have to meet the person who´s causing all of this, ok? Her house is next to ours; I chose this one so we can have an eye on her powers” She explained to you while pointing her finger to the house next to yours.

“If she controls everything here, then how she won´t be able to recognize that we are not under her control?” You were confused, how were you going to pass unnoticed by her?

“Do not worry darling, you´ll just have to follow me, I will be the nosy neighbor called Agnes and you will be my beautiful wife, you can choose your personality and the name of your character, c´mon tell me one” You thought for a moment before a name popped in your head

“Well I can be f/n and I´m not sure I´m already kind of a shy person so, maybe we can keep that” You said to her and Agatha nodded at you

“Alright darling, now follow me, we will have to greet her”

She offered her arm to you and you linked yours with her, Agatha gave you an encouraging smile, you felt safe with her and both of you walked towards the house next to yours.

Arriving at the entrance of the house, Agatha knocked two times on the door and before someone opened the door, you saw that Agatha was holding a plant in her left arm and you thought that she had conjured it, you brushed it off, someone was already opening the door when you felt Agatha passing her arm around your waist pulling you closer to her, your heated face became red and you bit your lip.

“Hello dear, I´m Agnes your neighbor to the right, my right not yours, and this is my lovely wife f/n” She looked at you smiling giving you a firm squeeze.

“Forgive us for not stopping by sooner, to welcome you to the block, we were doing lovely things, isn’t that right buttercup?” She asked winking at you, you grinned and nodded shyly biting your lip.

Agatha handed the potted plant to the woman in front of you, so this was the person who had created all of this.

Agatha dragged you with her entering the house of the stranger and started to ask her different things, she dragged you inside the house and when both of you were in the middle of the room, the woman placed herself in front of you

“I´m Wanda” Said the woman stretching out her hand, Agatha shook it and then Wanda stretched her hand out to you as well.

After sitting in one of the couches there and Agatha asked more questions, you heard your “wife” saying something to the other woman about a magazine, you felt Agatha standing up and she took your hand in hers.

“It was lovely to meet you Wanda, we would love to stay longer but we have a romantic dinner to prepare for ourselves” Agatha smiled at the two of you and you walked out of her house closing the door behind you.

You kept walking alongside Agatha and when you arrived at the door of the house you would be sharing for the next days, she removed herself from you to look at you.

“That was great darling, now we just have to do it for the next days, or weeks, we will see, for now you can enter to our house to settle in, I will go look around the town, I want to know if the entire town is under her control or just this part, ok?” You gave her a sweet smile and nodded she opened the door for you and your heart melted, you went inside and turned yourself to look at her.

“See you later darling” Agatha winked at you again and she closed the door before leaving.

You sighed, you never thought that you would be In the same house as Agatha Harkness, and more important you never thought you would be helping a powerful witch like her, this was something you would never have thought, and also you were going to pretend you were a married couple, when the thought came into your head, you blushed one more time, sitting in a couch you grabbed a cushion that was laying there and proceeded to hugged it, you were excited and felt happy

Going upstairs to see the rooms you entered to one of them, in it there was a bed for one person, pushing the door opened and admiring the decoration you smiled, everything was so pretty from the paintings hanging on the wall to the decorations on the nightstand.

Everything looked like one of those pictures in the magazines which you could look at the different ideas to decorate your room.

Walking to the bed you touched the covers, the sheets and the bedspreads, they were so soft and you couldn’t wait for the night to arrive to finally sleep in it.

You decided to go downstairs to prepare some tea, maybe it would be a better idea if you prepared something to eat for Agatha and you as well, but maybe she would come back really late, because the town wasn’t so small and she had gone to investigate, so maybe it was better not to, you didn’t know at what time she would be coming.

When the sound of the kettle drifted you away from your thoughts you walked towards the stove to pour some of the hot water into the mug that you had taken out from the cupboard.

You stayed there, sitting in the chair while drinking your tea and after finishing you didn’t know what else you could do, there were not a lot of things you could do right now, so deciding to read a book, you walked to the shelves situated in the living room and picked a random book that was placed there, the title read “The price of salt” you remembered the book had being later published under the name of “Carol”, so you just chose that one and laid in the couch, ready to read it.

After some hours of just sitting on the couch you heard someone knocking on the door and you were going to open the door so you stood up from the couch with the book in your hands, but Agatha opened it first and you just stopped in the middle of the corridor, when she saw you, Agatha smiled and you did the same

“Hello again darling! I’m sorry for letting you here alone, but now I have a little more information about what’s going on here” She said to you walking towards you to sit in the couch

"So, what did you do while your wife was busy darling?” Agatha sat down and she eyed what you were reading and couldn’t help but smirk, before you could say something, using her magic she took the book from your hand and it appeared in hers.

“I see darling, you entertained yourself while I was away, that’s totally fine, it’s always good to know what my partner in crime enjoys” You were blushing a lot, you wanted to hide your face, you tried to change the topic by asking her if she wanted something else from you.

“Oh no darling thanks for asking, actually I have to tell you something, tomorrow we will have to attend to one meeting with the other girls, Wanda invited us, it’s something about preparing things for a show, we will know tomorrow” Then she thought about it for a moment, what if you didn’t want to go? And she had rushed to conclusions before asking

“If you want to go of course, you do not have to if you do not want to” She looked shy for a moment

“Oh, Agatha do not worry I want to go, you do not have to worry, it can’t be that bad right? I mean I will just have to sit by your side and listen to whatever they say, so it’s alright” You urged to reassure her and brushed her shoulders

“Alright darling, also have you already chose the room you will be sleeping on?” She was curious and wanted to know

“Oh well, earlier I went to check upstairs and there are two rooms in front of each other so I checked one of them and I really liked it, it’s nice so, maybe you would like to take the one in front of mine” You told her shyly

“That’s alright honey, I will take that one, also is the bed in your room for one person or is it bigger?”

“Well is just for one person, it’s really pretty, it is situated in the corner of the room, why?” You curiously asked her

“Because that means then, that the room I will be in has the queen size bed, you see, these houses have a lot of rooms but one of them is the master bedroom, you know where the married couples sleep in, so are you comfortable with the room you got? If you want, we can change bedrooms”

“It’s alright seriously, you do not need to worry you can have the master bedroom, so we’re ok, I think I will go to sleep, you know traveling by smoke can take its toll on me, I feel tired, tomorrow will be a long day, good night Agatha” You said to her while patting slightly her hand and you took the book out of her hands ‘I will take this with me, thank you" you said and turned around to walk to your new bedroom.

Agatha smiled and stared at you; you were just so sweet.

The next day when you woke up seeing the clock on the nightstand that marked 8 o'clock in the morning, after brushing your teeth you decided to go downstairs to the kitchen to prepare something to eat.

Putting the kettle on the stove you waited for it to boil, So you checked the fridge, there were a lot of things in there and when you checked the cupboard you saw the ingredients to prepare pancakes, the eggs and the milk were in the fridge, the flour was in the shelve of the cupboard, so you had everything to make pancakes, you really didn’t know if Agatha liked them but you decided to make some for her as well

“Honey, what are you doing? I think I overslept” Your turned around to look at her, she was standing in front of the kitchen island already dressed in her plaid dress, you looked at yourself and blushed you were stills in your pajamas.

“Well you’re just in time, I mad pancakes, but in case you didn’t like them I also chopped some fruit, and the tee is ready so, I’m not sure if you would like to have breakfast”

Agatha felt a warm soft feeling in her chest just by looking at what you have done, you stood there in the middle of the kitchen with a spatula in your hand.

She couldn’t help herself from smiling at the sight.

“Oh that’s so sweet angel, of course I would love to have breakfast with you” You felt happy that Agatha had agreed, putting some pancakes in two plates you placed them on the kitchen island, Agatha came towards you and she grabbed two mugs from the cupboard and placed them on the table too, you smiled at her actions, after that you took the kettle from the stove and poured the water into the mugs, Agatha just stared at you, she felt something warm growing in her chest, this was something so new to her, it was something she craved long time ago, a piece of normality and a sense of belonging.

“I will change my clothes really quick and I will come back here, you can start without me, I bet you’re hungry” you said to her while taking the apron out of you, you passed by her side brushing her shoulder a little.

She had to admit you looked really cute with your pajamas on.

When you returned back to the kitchen Agatha eyed you from head to toe, this time you were wearing a circle dress with a waistband, and you had the same pin-up styled hair like yesterday.

Agatha and you sat at the kitchen stools, you were facing each other and she smiled, this was something new for her but also heart-warming.

Breakfast had gone incredibly amazing both of you ate in a peaceful and comforting silence, enjoying each other’s company and even when you finished, Agatha helped you to clean everything up.

"Are we ready to leave?” Asked Agatha leaning into the wall to look at you

“Yes, we’re ready, by the way where is the meeting, and how are we going to get to it, we just arrived, do you already know the town?” You asked your fake wife and she laughed at your eagerness

“Do not worry darling, we will meet Wanda outside her house, then we will just follow her to the club”

You understood and just nodded, she already had everything under control, so you were fine.

“Oh, alright maybe we should leave now, what if Wanda is already waiting for us?”

You started to walk towards the door and Agatha followed behind you, you opened the door and Agatha hurried to keep close to you.

When you left your house you saw Wanda around the bushes and when you arrived by her side she gasped and dropped something that she was holding you couldn’t see what it was and before you could understand what she was doing Agatha started to talk to her, you brushed the thought off and decided to stick beside her, you weren’t paying attention to what the two of them were saying and instead just focused yourself on the view of the town, it was quite pretty.

Arriving at the club you saw a huge pool in the middle of the place and next to it there were some chairs, you guessed that would be the place where the meeting would be taking place.

You were eager this was something really exciting for you, you just wanted to explore the place but that would be later for now you just had to sit with Agatha, o well Agnes now that she was in character.

The meeting was so boring, they were discussing about giving performances for the town and something for the children, you noted to ask Agatha later about that, and after some time of just spacing out halfway through the conversation they were having you couldn’t help but rest your head on Agatha’s shoulder, when she felt your action she unconsciously put her hand on you tight and stroked it, Dottie noticed you were not paying attention and she cleared her throat to drag your attention, you looked at her, and Agatha and Wanda glanced at each other and Agatha rolled her eyes, you just ignored Dottie.

When the meeting finally finished Agatha and you stood up to get ready for the talent show.

“Wow that was so intense” you said to Agatha and she agreed, Dottie’s personality could be a little too intense.

“That’s right but I’m sure Wanda’s making her act like that, later we have to attend to the talent show, I wonder what the others will be doing at it, we still have at least two hours until the show starts, so what would you like to do for now doll?”

“I’m not sure, I mean there’s a whole town to explore, could we, I don’t know, maybe go for a walk? I would like to see more of this town” You were looking straight into her eyes, she really had beautiful blue eyes.

“Of course, y/n we can go for a walk, the weather is really nice” Agatha smiled back at you, her smile could bright ay room, you were sure of that.

After one hour of walking through the neighborhood with your arms intertwined, Agatha told you that it was time to go to the talent show and both of you went to the center of the town to be part of the audience; the show started and it wasn’t bad, actually you enjoyed it, a lot, watching Wanda trying to cover everything Vision was doing was hilarious, you couldn’t stop laughing the entire time Wanda and Vision were on stage and you hadn’t realized that Agatha´s attention was not on the show but on you, she had passed the entire show watching you laugh, she couldn’t help herself, she thought that your laugh was something so beautiful and she just stared at you the whole time.

When both of you returned to your home something strange happened, everything around you got color, and the furniture changed, you were amazed, how could that even happen?

The days kept passing and Agatha and you had your pretty daily routine, sometimes when she overslept you would wake up first and prepare breakfast for the both of you, you really enjoyed her company she was so wise, she knew a lot of things and she also taught you new things that you didn’t know about magic, Agatha had told you that now she understood better what Wanda had been doing there, she had been trying to make everything and everyone act like some sort of sitcom, now everything made more sense, that explained why your house and your clothes kept changing from time to time.

Agatha enjoyed your company a lot, whenever you cooked for her or whenever she helped you cook she felt so happy, she wanted to do everything with you, a beautiful friendship had blossom between you and her, you didn’t feel alone anymore and she was always eager to come home earlier, she of course kept keeping an eye on Wanda´s magic but at the same time she just wanted to try different things with you, to be honest she never thought that she could share her life with someone else, she was always looking for more power but now, with you helping her by her side she felt at peace, she felt happy and she was really glad that you had arrived at the same time to Westview like her, she felt that you completed her in a way she never knew she didn’t have, an empty space had been inside her, and she hadn’t noticed it until you arrived, and now she was not sure if she wanted this illusion that Wanda had created to end.

You were so mesmerized by Agatha, whenever she smiled at you or call you pet names, you felt so nervous but at the same time you loved it, you loved everything about Agatha, how whenever she focused on something she would grab with one hand her elbow and she would take the other hand to her face, it was something you noticed since the first day you met her, her voice was so soothing and soft, you were completely smitten by her.

This time it was Halloween and after Wanda´s twins were born, Agatha and you kept visiting Wanda´s house, the children were so sweet to you, they seemed to like you and they were really funny, you even liked Wanda´s company at this point, also the kids called both of you “Aunt Agnes and Aunt y/n”.

Yesterday the kids had asked Wanda if “Agnes” and you could come with them for trick or treating, of course you agreed, it would be really funny to go with them.

You and Agatha had decided to wear matching costumes and your fake wife and you decided to wear like witches, you laughed at the idea, how ironic it was, so now you were standing in front of Wanda´s house, ready to have an amazing Halloween night, not to say that you were really excited and Agatha could feel it, you just loved Halloween so much, the decorations and actually everything about it, so sad it is too short, but for now you would enjoy it.

Billy opened the door and he greeted you calling his brother and his mother, all of you left the house and walked to the center of the town.

While you were walking down the street you notice that Tommy was looking at you in a strange way, you could feel him staring at you during all the time the five of you walked towards the center of the town, you found it weird but tried not to mind him, maybe he was just curious about something or maybe he wanted to ask you something, you couldn’t guess.

After the kids had enjoyed themselves and after they had enough candies, Agnes and you went to sit in one of the chairs that were placed on the little garden decorated with pumpkins, even some scarecrows where situated around the place, everything looked great, turning your head to look at Agatha you just bit your lip, she looked so beautiful with her witch hat on her head, her silver hair that she had chosen to match her outfit looked amazing on her, honestly anything looked great on her, you didn’t notice the twins and her mom getting close to you until you heard the sound of the chairs being moving out of their place.

You were drifted away from your thoughts by them and looking back to them you still notice the strange look on Tommy´s face, you tried to smile and this time Agatha noticed his look.

“Tommy did you know that is rude to stare at other people?” She asked and you could hide your laugh.

“Tommy, why are you looking at them like that?” This time Wanda asked her kid, now she was curious

“I´m sorry I was just wondering something” Tommy said and you turned your face to look at Agatha, had he notice something off? You tried to calm yourself and waited for him to speak again

“You two are married right?” Asked Tommy and you and Agatha nodded at the same time, now Wanda became more curious, what was he trying to say?

“Then why you never kiss? I´ve never seen you kiss each other, not like my mom and my dad, also why you never hug? Do you have problems? I´ve seen on the tv that when- “

“Tommy that´s enough sweetheart” Wanda interrupted her son while she laughed a little bit ashamed of what Tommy had said, but then she squinted her eyes at you, and now you felt scared, she had realized, now you were sure, you were scared of her, you tried to calm yourself but under Wanda´s gaze you found it impossible.

“I don’t want to seem like a nosy person but, um, Tommy´s right I´ve never seen you acting like a married couple” She tried to smile but now she was really intrigued, what was going on?

You felt a hand around your waist and heard Agatha´s laugh.

“Oh darling, you do not have to worry about our relationship, we are good, right doll?” She shifted herself a little to face you, putting her hand that was not grabbing your waist on your face, she lifted your face a little and she did something you were not waiting.

You saw her leant her face and you closed your eyes, waiting for the kiss.

She captured your lips into hers, her soft lips against yours, adrenaline rushing, you placed your hands on her chest, and you could felt your heart thumping on your chest, you were stunned and heat rose from your stomach, the kiss became a little intense and before you could continue, you had to break the kiss for some air.

You parted your eyes from hers to her lips, and you bit your lip, you saw Agatha looking right at your lips and she winked at you.

“Well, excuse my son, he can be a little curious, I think we will let you finish; we can see you tomorrow” Wanda said with a smirk, and she took her son´s hands, they waved at you saying goodbye and you did the same.

“I´m sorry I should have asked before but- “You didn’t let Agatha finish her words, you pressed yourself against her body one more time passing your arms around her neck and she hugged your waist pulling you closer to her, you opened your mouth to let her kiss you widely.

By the time you broke the kiss, you were grinning.

“Oh, Agatha you do not know how much I´ve wanted to do that, you do not have to ask for permission” Biting your lower lip again when you felt she had a strong grip around your waist, now you were grateful Tommy was too curious.

“Now love, we won´t have to just act, the truth is that I´ve been wanting to hold you, touch you and kiss you, now I would be able to do it, so would you like to go home to finish this there?”

You swallowed at her words, she was right, now you wouldn’t have to act, you were going for the real thing this time and you loved it.

“Of course, I would love to go home, we could worry about the magic and all of that later” Agatha helped you to stand up and she took your hand in hers, this time she gave you a lovely peck on your lips, she broke the distance a little to caress your face with her free hand.

“You´re so beautiful love, you know that? I´m in love with you, and I don´t want this to end, I want you to stay with me”

She looked at you with pure love in her eyes, that was exactly what you wanted with her and nodding excitedly you hugged her, pressing your head into her chest, she dropped a kiss to your hair before lifting your face to look at her again.

“I want to stay with you too, I´m so in love with you, I have loved you without being completely aware of it, but now I do not want to be away from you”

Pulling you closer to her, Agatha pressed her hand in your waist, she didn’t want to be away from you either, this was just the start of something beautiful.

“Let´s go home, we can talk more about this” She leant into your ear “And we can have a more private conversation my love” You shivered at her words being whispered in your ear and her breath against your neck, you could wait to go home.

You were really grateful Tommy had spoken, now you were going to have an amazing night with Agatha.

[ladykailitha]

A Love Connection Part 3

Hey, all! Welcome to first of two posts today.

I've really got to ask, are you guys seeing these posts? I dropped from 70-80 notes on a post at the beginning of the month to barely cracking 40-50 these days and then it slowly works up as more people see it, but it's taking weeks to get that when it used to take a day maybe two.

I did change my schedule but the people I'm tagging should be able to see them right? And the people that have me on notifications?

Also I've seen a sharp drop in people that used to comment and reblog all the time, from anywhere from not seeing them at all to them only liking a post.

I'm not trying to dog anyone, I'm just curious about the sudden change.

Any advice would be helpful.

This morning's chapter includes the cutest kitten (Sorry Nermal), a Robin apology, and Chrissy and Robin have a confession to make.

Part 1 Part 2

~

Steve pulled up to the apartment building and turned off his car. He put his head on the steering wheel with a heavy sigh. He was about to hit his head on the horn when he heard it. He lifted his head and tilted it.

There!

Steve scrambled to get out of the car. He rushed toward the sound. He skidded on the wet and icy pavement as he tried to come to a stop, nearly toppling over in the process. Near the dumpsters was a wet cardboard box, falling apart in the thick snow.

He scrambled toward it, trying to keep his feet under him. He knelt in the snow and peeled back as sagging corner of the box to reveal the sweetest thing he had ever seen. There, all alone in the destroyed box was a small cream colored kitten with dark brown ears. It looked up at Steve and mewled in the weakest, most plaintive meow imaginable.

He sank to his knees and with gentle hands scooped the wet creature into his arms. It clung to him as he stood shakily to his feet.

“Hey, little guy,” he murmured. “Don’t you know outside is no place to be at this time of year?”

It mewled again and clung a little harder to Steve’s coat. “There’s no place open for me to get you checked out, little one, but let’s get you inside and dried off at the very least, then I’ll see what I have that you can eat until I can get you some proper food. How does that sound?”

“Mew!”

Steve chuckled. “I figured you’d be down with that.”

He turned away from the now fully collapsed box, that once had read on the outside “KITTENS FREE TO GOOD HOME”

~

Before Steve even gotten the kitten dried and fed, he knew he was going to keep it. The poor little thing was as alone as he was feeling in that moment.

He looked up vet services and vowed to make a run to the pet store for supplies first thing in the morning.

He looked up everything he could; like how old the kitten was likely to be, what kind of nutrition the little thing needed, how to tell the sex of his new friend, what toys it would need, proper bedding.

He fell asleep reading how to tell how big a kitten was going to grow up to be, the kitten nestled under his chin.

Steve woke up to distressed mewling. He shot up when he realized it, no not it, he, was no longer on his chest. At first he couldn’t see him, but then he caught sight of the small little paw located near the distressed meows.

He peered over the sofa and burst out laughing. Somehow the kitten had gotten one of his claws caught in the afghan Joyce had given him his first year as a teacher. Something she did for all new teachers at her school regardless of their years being a teacher.

He reached over and gently untangled the little thing from the blanket. “There you go. What were you doing up there anyway?”

“Merrow!” he meowed.

Steve checked his watch and was pleased to note it was barely seven. Which meant he had plenty of time to get dressed, get the little tyke checked out and to stop by the pet store for supplies.

He set him down on the sofa and immediately the kitten tried to walk off the edge. “All all kittens this dumb or is it just you?”

“Meroh!” the kitten cried.

He laughed and scooped him up into his arms. He set the kitten in the middle of the bed so he could change his clothes. Steve laughed every time he had to stop what he was doing and rescue him from the edge, placing him in the center of the bed once again.

Finally he was ready to go. He placed the kitten in his coat to keep it from getting stuck under the car seat and for Steve’s own piece of mind.

He drove to the nearest vet and hoped it wouldn’t cost him an arm and a leg to get the little guy checked out.

~

The vet was quick and painless. On his wallet too. The nice lady at the desk got him set up with a vaccination schedule and the adoption papers.

“All right,” she said warmly, “all he needs is a name.”

Steve chewed on his lip for a moment before he wrote in big capital letters “ODIE”.

She raised her eyebrow but before she could comment the vet’s assistant came out with the little rascal. “That has got be the stupidest or the most fearless kitten I’ve ever met.”

The desk lady looked back at the vet’s assistant and then back at Steve who was trying very hard to hide his smile and failing miserably.

She sighed and helped put the kitten in a cardboard carrier. “There you go, Odie is all set.”

The vet’s assistant burst out laughing. “I like it.”

Steve was about to ask for her number when he noticed a ring on her left hand. Damn.

Oh well, he couldn’t win them all. He thanked them both and took his new friend out to his car.

“Come on, Odie,” he murmured, buckling the carrier into the passenger seat, “lets go get you everything you’ll need.”

~

Steve had just gotten into the car when his cell phone pinged. He opened it to reveal a text from Robin telling him to call her.

He dialed her number. “Hey, Bobbin.”

“So, um...my girlfriend is mad at me for ditching you,” she began nervously, “and making you watch the AV club when last night was supposed to be about hanging out with you before we left.”

Steve sighed. Which meant that Robin had lied to Chrissy about him joining them later and she only found out this morning that was never the plan. “How much hot water are you in?”

“A lot,” Robin admitted. “Like if this trip hadn’t been planned for months, I wouldn’t be going kind of hot water.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand and sighed. “Yeah, that’s pretty bad. Is she doing the thing with her bottom lip and watery eyes?”

“Yes!” she wailed. “Now I feel horrible!”

“About upsetting your girlfriend or for ditching me?” he asked because he felt it was a very important distinction she needed to make.

“Shit!” she hissed. “Of course I feel horrible about leaving you with seven little demons. I know I wasn’t last night when you were messaging me, but I filled with booze. When I got home I was filled with regret. I’m the one that told her about ditching you, she didn’t find out any other way. I promise. You know how get with pretty ladies. Chrissy had showed me what she planned to wear out last night, yesterday morning and that the only thought in my head all day. And when you kept messaging me, and Chrissy kept asking me when you were coming out, I just dug a hole for myself and just kept digging. I’m really sorry.”

She paused for a moment. “I probably should have led with that instead of the upset girlfriend, huh?”

Steve clicked his tongue. “Yeah, probably. So when are you two leaving?”

“In a few minutes,” she murmured. “We have everything packed up and ready to go, we just need to get to the airport and get checked in.”

“Are you sure you two don’t want me to take you?” Steve asked. “I could be there in five minutes. That way you don’t have to take an Uber or pay for long term parking.”

Suddenly there was BEEP, BEEP!

“Looks like our ride is here,” Robin said. “Chrissy got one of her friends to take us because they live closer. But you better pick us up, okay? I’ll miss your stupid face.”

“Your face is stupider,” Steve teased back. “You two ladies have a great trip and I’ll see you in a week.”

Robin sighed dramatically. “Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”

“I can’t,” Steve said, “you’re taking all the stupid with you.”

“Hey!” she protested as he hung up on her. He chuckled at the immediate message he got after the call disconnected.

He looked over at the new cat carrier he bought. It was much bigger than Odie currently needed but Steve wanted to give him room to grow into. The kitten was currently asleep in it. Having passed out while Steve was shopping. This is didn’t count as doing something stupid while she was gone, he reasoned, because she was still here.

~

Once Steve got home, he setup the cat bed in the living room, the food and water dishes in the kitchen and the litterbox in the bathroom. He would need to be trained to use the litterbox, but the nice ladies at the vet said it was fairly easy because it was pretty much their instinct to want to bury their wastes.

Steve just had to be consistent. Which was perfect because he had the next two weeks off.

He put the pet toys in his room and settled Odie in. He had been fed and shown the litterbox where he promptly did his business. Steve turned on the latest season of “A Love Connection” and Odie immediately curled up on Steve’s chest right under his chin.

Yeah, this was going to work out just fine.

Over the next week Steve and Odie got used to each other and Steve learned that Odie was more fearless than stupid. He wouldn’t go anywhere he might actually get hurt, once he knew where the limits were. But he was always testing those limits.

Steve knew that he would probably have to find a bigger place once Odie had grown up because of all the jumping the little thing tried to do.

The kitten was aptly named in one sense though, he followed Steve around like a dog. Always at Steve’s heels.

He wasn’t sure how many times he almost stepped on Odie, but it was a lot. But he had good reflexes and he sure put them to the test.

~

A week later, Chrissy and Robin showed up at the apartment with a six pack of his favorite beer, a large bag of gummy worms, and of course his Christmas presents. But it was the guilty expressions that really sold it.

“So um...” Robin began looking at Chrissy for help. “In early November, ‘Love Connection’ posted online for a casting call for their all queer season of their show. I think it’s a little rude that it’ll be for the thirteenth season, but–”

Chrissy put her hand on Robin’s arm. “What Robin is trying to say is that we sent in your application as a joke. We didn’t think that they would pick it. It was one in a couple million shot, you know? Anyway, I think they must have recognized my email as the one attached to my Twitter account and well...”

Steve put his face in his hands. “You didn’t...come on, guys. I don’t want to go on a game show to find love. I’m not that desperate yet.”

“We brought you gummy bears and beer!” Robin said hold up her prizes like that would help the matter. At all.

Steve was ready to open his mouth to shut this down when he got the best idea. “I’ll do the show on one condition,” he said with a blinding smile.

Chrissy and Robin shared a shocked glance. They didn’t think he would agree so easily.

“Yeah, okay,” Chrissy said warily, not sure where this was going.

Steve dashed into the bedroom and came back holding the kitten Lion King style. “I get to keep Odie!”

~

Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

Tag List: FIVE SLOTS LEFT

1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog

2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji

5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

9- @dreamercec @wheneverfeasible @themoonagainstmers @garden-of-gay @little-birch-boy

[thezombieprostitute]

Tech Tuesday: Jonathan Pine

Summary: Jonathan Pine is very nice to work for but you've been fooled before.

Word Count: >1k

Warnings: Implied age discrimination, Smut. Please let me know if I missed any!

A/N: Reader is 40+ years old and female. No physical descriptors used.

Tech Tuesdays Masterlist

Previous

As promised, the job description is in your inbox by the end of the day. Your jaw drops at the salary information; it's so much more than you've ever made! You spend the rest of the week contemplating the offer. The benefits are nothing to sneeze at. You'd even be given your own little house on the property for you to do with what you wish. And, you wouldn't have to worry about being replaced for a younger woman. You wouldn't be part of Ari's formal presentation to guests. You'd just be running things in the background so your age, your looks, wouldn't matter to him or Raymond.

"Rose?" Jonathan gets your attention. "May I have a minute of your time?"

"You have all of my time, Mr.--Jonathan." You still weren't quite used to using his first name. "But you should be on your way to the meeting with the Advertising Department. You're going to be late."

"Right," he nods. "I should get going, but please do find some time for you and I to talk today?"

"Of course, Jonathan," you smile as you hand him his tea and notebook and send him on his way.

You're not entirely sure what's happened to him but, ever since the visit from Mr. Levinson, he's been...sad? He hasn't been anywhere near on top of things like usual. He gives you sad looks. Longing looks? That can't be right. You wonder if Mr. Levinson asked about you and Jonathan figured out he was offering you a different job. He is a rather intelligent man, after all. Probably the smartest you've ever worked with.

Maybe that's why part of you doesn't want to accept the offer. Jonathan is very different from your previous employers in all the best ways. He's never given you the impression that he wants a different assistant. He compliments your work, your wit, your personality as well as your looks. He works with you to make sure you're comfortable in the workplace. He even compares you to a rose. You've never had someone, even in your personal life, treat you so well.

Now that you think about it, you can't remember the last time Jonathan had told you about a date. Early in your employment he would occasionally go out or ask you to make sure he had a lunch free for a date, but it's been quite some time. Instead, he seems to spend his spare moments with you.

That realization gives you pause. Yes, you and Jonathan really should talk. You immediately go into his calendar and schedule a meeting around the time the office Halloween party starts.

It's just the two of you left in the office. Everyone else has either gone home or is enjoying the party. You take a breath to steady yourself before entering Jonathan's office. He's lost in thought, staring at his computer screen, still as can be. Sitting across from him gets his attention and his eyes brighten a little as he sees you before his face turns pensive again.

"I know Mr. Levinson has offered you another job," Jonathan begins. "And, while I haven't seen the details of it, I can imagine it's offering far more money than you could ever make here. Likely better benefits as well. And, more likely still, having to deal with significantly fewer idiots and angry people. It would be a significantly better job in many ways."

He takes a breath to steady himself before looking you in the eyes. "But I must ask you to please consider staying. I should be quite lost without you."

The look he gives you makes you think he's telling the truth, that he wants you to stay. But you've been fooled before so you decide to push. "I'd think you could easily find another assistant. Someone...who hasn't worked long enough to have their own habits and eccentricities. Someone you can train to better mesh with your own work style."

"There's no one better than you," he whisper hoarsely, catching you off guard. His eyes are tearing up and he leans forward, over the desk. "You've always been an incredible employee and an even better person. I have only ever benefited from having you in my...in my employ. Please stay."

"Jonathan...I..."

"I am fully prepared to get on my knees and beg, if that is what you require."

That gets your attention. How many times has an employer let you go only to beg you to come back when their new, young assistant proved unable to do their jobs? And now, here was a man who was willing to beg you to stay. He has never once pushed you to quit, only to be yourself, to speak up.

Your emotions get the better of you and you lean forward, pull Jonathan towards you, and give him the deepest, most passionate kiss you've ever given. His initial shock is quickly replaced by his own fervent need and he clumsily climbs over his desk, lips barely leaving yours, and kneels before you. You wrap your arms around his head and continue to hold him close, his kisses making you feel a little drunk with lust.

When you finally break the kiss to get some air Jonathan chuckles, "if I'd known the offer getting on my knees would get your affections I would have done it years ago."

"So you don't just want me here to do my job?" Your voice is full of cautious optimism.

"I have wanted you for quite some time now," he confesses. "But always wished to be respectful of your boundaries. You would continually put the wall of professionalism up so I made sure to behave accordingly. However, if you are willing to let me in, I would gladly worship you. All of you. Please? Please allow me?"

"Close the blinds to your office, lock the door, and take me, Jonathan."

He smiles, a mixture of joy and lust written all over his face, and kisses you again before going to fulfill your requirements. While he does that, you move to sit on his desk. It's not cushiony, but it's a less awkward position than the chair.

"Hold on," Jonathan urges. He takes off his jacket and folds it for you to sit on. "As much as I need you, I want you to be comfortable."

"Thank you, Jonathan," you rasp before wrapping your arms around him and kissing him again.

You'd known he was a strong, if lean, build but actually feeling his muscles gave you new insight into that strength. He deftly unclasps your bra before pushing up your shirt and exposing your breasts. He kneads them as he lavishes your neck and shoulders with kisses. Your own hands go to unbutton his shirt, but when you fumble a couple times, Jonathan pulls away and lifts the shirt over his head to remove it, before immediately setting his lips against yours.

Both of you are almost painfully worked up and it isn't long before you're moaning for Jonathan to fill you up. He looks almost abashed at the effect you have on him. "I promise, next time I will be far more thorough," he rasps in your ear before removing your panties.

He slides his fingers through your folds making you whine with neediness. He smirks when he feels how wet you are and slides a finger inside you, reveling in your moans. "Oh my darling rose," he coos. "How I've longed to see you like this." He pulls out his fingers and licks them while you watch, dazed with need. He undoes his belt and lowers his pants, giving you a good look at his erection. It's much thicker than you've ever been with and you lick your lips in anticipation before looking into his eyes and reiterating your need to be filled by him.

As he pushes into your core you let out the most lascivious moan. When he's fully sheathed you wrap your legs around his lithe form and you start moving your hips, making him gasp. "You feel so good. I knew you'd feel incredible," he murmurs. "Please, don't stop." He reaches between your bodies and plays with your clit, making you roll your hips more. Your orgasm hits you and you're unable to hold back. You arch your spine and Jonathan takes one of your nipples in his mouth, trying to distract himself from cumming too soon while your pussy clenches around him. It's only as you're coming down from your high that he allows himself to cum inside you.

You run your fingers through his hair as he struggles to keep his full weight off of you. When you catch your breath you gently push his face so he 's looking at you. "What do you say we get dressed and go to my place for some of that 'more thorough' care you promised?"

Tech Tuesdays Masterlist

Previous

Tagging @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory;

@late-to-the-party-81; @lokislady82 ; @peyton-warren @ronearoundblindly; @stellar-solar-flare

[otomehonyaku]

Diabolik Lovers Lost Eden Drama CD Translation ☽ Vol. 4 Mukami Saga ☽ Track 1・Feelings Towards Eden

Original title of this track: エデンへの想い Voiced by Sakurai Takahiro (Ruki), Suzuki Tatsuhisa (Yuma), Kishio Daisuke (Azusa), Kimura Ryōhei (Kou) English translation by @otomehonyaku Click here for the audio (as always, BIG thank you to @karleksmumskladdkaka!)

TRACK 1 ・TRACK 2 ・TRACK 3・TRACK 4・TRACK 5・AFTER STORY

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

This is the fourth volume of the Lost Eden drama CDs! I'll make separate posts for each track and update the links above as I go. I absolutely loved this first one—especially the narration by Ruki at the start of the track (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) It was a blast to translate, so I wish you happy listening and reading along!

Please do not reuse or post my translations elsewhere or translate my work into other languages without my permission.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

00:00 Ruki: Banmaden—the Founders’ castle in the Demon World. A single woman was left behind there—Eve—who holds the most exceptional and highly sought-after blood in all of the Demon World. By orders of the First Bloods, she is waiting devotedly for someone to come and get her. Oh, she is forlorn. Hopelessly so. The biting cold of the stone castle will soon freeze over not only her body, but also her spirit. She waits and waits, endlessly, so long a time that it feels like forever. One day, out of the blue, the sounds of countless flapping wings reach her ears. Right away, she understands that her salvation is near. The flapping wings persuade her to follow them, and so she leaves the stone castle behind and follows the sounds deep into the Demon World forest. With nobody else to depend on, she lets the wings aid her on her quest to find her saviour.

01:31  Ruki: I had steeled myself for this, but when I took in the scenery with my own eyes, it still hit home. The ever-blooming flowers of Eden wilted, having lost their master and the nourishment he supplied them with. Eden’s rich waters were close to drying up. The water that had glistened with life before, sparkling like sand crystals when you cupped it with your hands, was dead. Filthy. I remembered once again, in vivid detail, that His powers had given life to this castle. Karl Heinz—the man I considered my father, the man I revered—is no longer in this world. And now we are losing Eden, too. 

02:25 Azusa: I feel a… tightness in my chest… Because of him, everything is changing… Yes… That day, we were called to Eden… We thought this was the place… that was considered paradise (1). It was the place where the seven-coloured birds would sing… Where the golden butterflies fluttered about… The place whose sweet, pleasant scent… calmed us… This place… will be gone soon… This place has been reduced to nothing…

03:52 Kou: I felt myself becoming hopeless. I probably wasn’t the only one. Because this place was our home. A place we could always return to. The place where He was always waiting for us. The man who showed us both kindness and a certain cold-hearted severity. Eden was a place we cherished unlike anything else. It was irreplaceable. But now, it looked nothing like we remembered it. It was said to be a sanctuary for the immortal, but…

04:40 Yuma: I used to think ‘home’ wasn’t a physical place, but I was reminded once again that it was quite nice to have a physical place to come home to. No matter where I looked, I saw nothing but death and decay. It made His death feel all the more real. For the first time, I realised that Eden was more important to me than I had ever thought.

05:16 Ruki: Eden has been reduced to rubble.

Kou: Stop it. Don’t say stuff like that.

Ruki: It’s the truth, isn’t it?

Yuma: It is, but you could’ve said it another way.

Ruki: Yeah.

Azusa: Ruki, doesn’t it make you sad?

Ruki: How so?

Kou: What do you mean, ‘how so’? This place was like home to us. A place where we made memories. How could you flat-out say it’s as good as ruined?

Azusa: Yeah.

Ruki: Let me turn that question around. Do you truly think this does not affect me in any way?

Kou: Of course not.

Ruki: Then you are correct. Of course I think it’s very unfortunate. Other than that, all I feel is resentment. How did it come to this? Eden must have a master. Why did He abandon his duty?

[Ruki punches a wall.]

Kou: Ruki…

Azusa: I’m sorry, Ruki… I never realised…

Yuma: We were a bit thoughtless…

Ruki: No, it’s alright. Either way, wallowing in sadness and anger will not improve this situation. We must do whatever we…

[A bat flies towards them.]

06:52 Kou: Huh? Is that a bat? It might be someone’s familiar.

Ruki: Be careful.  They might be the same species as we are, but do not let your guard down.

Azusa: It looks like it’s… holding a letter.

Yuma: Ah. I’ll take it, then. There we go.

[Yuma takes the letter from the familiar. The familiar takes off again.]

Yuma: Here.

Ruki: Thanks.

[Ruki takes the letter from Yuma.]

Ruki: Oh—this is…

Kou: Who’s it from?

Ruki: This is the Tsukinami family seal.

Azusa: It’s from… Carla?

Ruki: What on Earth could he want?

[Ruki opens the letter.]

Ruki: Ah…

Yuma: A letter from that Tsukinami bastard? That’s a surprise.

Kou: Yeah. It’s someone you would least expect a letter from.

Azusa: Ruki… What does it say?

Ruki: Hey, you three. You have to go to Banmaden. Now.

Yuma: What? Banmaden? The fuck’s goin’ on there?

Ruki: That woman—Eve—is waiting for us.

Kou: What’s Kitten doing in Banmaden? 

Ruki: I don’t know the details. Hurry. You have to go and get her right away.

Azusa: Yes… If she’s all by herself… she must be very lonely…

Yuma: I don’t know what the hell’s goin’ on, but… It can’t be helped. Let’s go.

Ruki: I’m counting on you. I will send out a familiar ahead of you to announce your arrival.

Kou: Alright!

Azusa: Wait here.

[The three brothers walk off.]

08:49 [Kou, Yuma and Azusa are flying to Banmaden. The translator is a little confused as to why they added airplane noises but thinks it’s funny to imagine that vampires sound like airplanes when they fly/levitate.]

Azusa: Still… It’s a little surprising, isn’t it?

Yuma: You mean that Tsukinami asshole?

Azusa: Yeah.

Kou: Why would that arrogant Carla want to leave Kitten in our care? Something must be wrong.

Yuma: Like what?

Kou: I’m not sure… I think it must have been an emergency. He probably had no other choice.

Azusa: I hope Eve… is alright, though…

Yuma: Ugh. Of course she is! Otherwise the guy wouldn’t have asked us to come get her, right?

Kou: Hmm…

Azusa: Oh—that’s Eve!

Yuma: See! I told you. Y’all are worrywarts. 

[Yuma dives towards Yui ahead of his brothers.]

Azusa: Yuma…! That’s not fair…

Kou: He’s calling us worrywarts, but he was clearly the most worried out of all of us.

Yuma: Huh? D’ya say something?

Kou: Nothing at all!

[Kou and Azusa follow Yuma.]

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

楽園（らくえん）: Lit. ‘paradise,’ i.e. the Japanese word for Eden.

[sucuretcannelle]

hi! i briefly remember you saying that you're into if's, so i was wondering what your favorites are

Sighs and shakes a red cup full of ice

Nobody thinks I'm a nerd till they hear the way I talk about interactive fiction...no one knows...

Anyway I started playing IF's in like December. Time flies

This is kind of in order? Of like enjoyment. HOWEVER take this with a grain of salt because I was sitting here trying to rearrange them (except the top 3) for 40 minutes. If it was mentioned, it's good 🙂‍↕️

1. The six that thrive by @the-six-that-thrive-if —

the way I was playing this bro. I wouldn't let myself sleep until I was done with the demo and not because it felt like I had to, but I knew I would be PISSED if I went to bed without absorbing all the content (Dante give me a chance PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏). Anyway the hierarchy system reminds me of the one that I have for the way I wrote hell and I was like 🫵 OMG THATS SO COOL.

Key factor that I appreciate: Dialogue, descriptions, and transitions. Dante is deadass so funny I'm not even playing bro. Buddy how do you write like that, lmk. Also the official art has me gnawing at the bars of my enclosure

2. College Tennis: Origin Story by @collegetennisoriginstory — I ACTUALLY HAVE A FUCKING PROBLEM BRO. LOOK. IN MY HEAD, I WAS IGNORING THAT THEY WERE PLAYING TENNIS SO I WAS VISUALIZING VOLLEYBALL. SO AT SOME POINT I READ THE WORD RACKET AND I WAS LIKE WHAT ARE WE PLAYING???

Key factor that I appreciate: Skill checks, attention to side characters, amazing use of character tropes. Idk how to describe it but the writing felt so CLEAN. Like so organized and orderly. Plus I wanna study all of the characters under a microscope

3. Superstition (omg first IF I ever played) by @13leaguestories — I played this while I was sick and that's literally all I did for 2 days besides eating and sleeping. Am I okay? Yeah cuz it happened in December but like I was OBSESSED. And ashamed. My friend told me i would be into Zillah and she was right. I haven't recovered. I promise I'm in therapy.

Key factor that I appreciate: The fact that there was always something going on. Literally at least 3 things were happening at the same time, all the time, and it kept my lil depressed ass stimulated. Who could ask for more

4. Infamous by @infamous-if — this game makes me scared of commitment cuz I can't have Orion and Griffin😐 I might be biased because. I sing! So I was just really connected to this story immediately. Either way, one of my favs cuz the writing is saurrrr good, makes ya feel

Key factor that I appreciate — Infamous is generally well rounded, so I don't feel like it's LACKING in anything. Me gusta.

5. Mind blind by @mindblindbard — I have a problem so I'm a stereotypical Rosie fan. But anyway I personally loved this one because of the world building, even tho I'm a character-focused girlie. Plus the game is so funny for no reason

Key factor that I appreciate— I actually really like the MC in general. Which is funny to say, because they're supposed to be you, but MC's are different from game to game, and I like this one

6. Soulmates Inc by @soulmatesinc-if — idk with some games, it's just the vibe. Like the vibe is right so I'll read it (which like...it's hard for me to find games where the vibe is what drags me along. Tis really good)

Key factor I appreciate — Wyatt. omg who said that...I also love this game's take on soulmates. It's simple, but original, and I fw it

7. Nine Blood Dances by @nineblooddances-if— I'm boutta cry, how did you end up here twice without me noticing bro. Idk this one and TSTT have like, vibes that are connected by a small string, and I did play this one first if that matters.

Key factor that I enjoyed: It felt very structured, and again, clean. I really don't know what this feeling is

8. When Twilight Strikes by @evertidings — I love ALL the characters because damn near all of them pissed me off once. That's actually impressive /pos. Anyway Rylan hit my line

Key factor that I enjoyed: watching my relationship descriptions change. Some left me devastated stop... Like sorry A you're driving me nuts...

Honorable mentions:

Apartment 502 by @apt502-if — I can't wait to see the future parts cuz like I like it but I cant analyze any of the characters yet. But trust me I'm ready 📝

The Kings Hound by @the-kingshound — Same typa situation was Apartment 502... I'm waiting...patiently 📝

[itspbandjellytime]

The Assistant [Hailee Steinfeld x Fem!Reader] - Chapter 3

Plot: Y/N Waldorf is fresh out of college and her first job is being Hailee Steinfeld's personal assistant, but what Y/N doesn't know is that Hailee is hiding a huge secret from the general public and from her, as her assistant.

Notes: This is a multi-chapter fic, you can also read this on wattpad under the same username "itspbandjellytime". This fanfic is also going to contain NSFW themes in the near future, so if you're under the age of 18 please don't read this. Thank you!

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Word count: 1.4k words

[Y/N's POV]

The next day arrived, today is the day I move in with Hailee. I already packed my bags earlier this morning again, I looked at Jackie with a smile on her face and gave her a tight hug "Girl, don't be sad, at least we live in the same state now." I reassured her as she fake cries. Jackie pulls away from her and laughs "I know, I am just being very dramatic and besides, West Hollywood and Malibu is a 40 minute drive. You can visit anytime you want." Jackie told me "Hailee isnt expecting you to show up, that quick right?" Jackie asks me as I reached for the door. I respond with a shrug "Eh, better to be early.", Jackie grabs my wrist all of a sudden which made my eyes widen. "You good?" I ask her with a confused tone, Jackie told me to sit down on the couch with her for a bit.

"Yeah, It's just that I've been hearing something online about Hailee... you know... Keeping a secret from the general public?" Jackie said, as much as I love Jackie, she's my best friend, I will jump off a tall building and sell my organs for that woman... There are times that she relies on random and odd stuff on the internet, especially engaging in blind item pages like Deuxmoi. I furrow my brows, oblivious on what Jackie was telling me "What do you mean? Also what did I tell you interacting with those pages?" I said in a very motherly tone despite the fact that Jackie is two years older than me. 

"Heard it from Deuxmoi before you got here, someone said that Hailee Steinfeld is hiding a secret from the public and only her manager knows about it." Jackie says, and then gasps "Do you think she's pregnant?" 

"GIRL WHAT THE FUCK?!?" I yelled "You've been on Deuxmoi way too much! We both know that site is like the fifth? or lower circle in hell, you know what Tree Paine did when Deuxmoi went after Taylor Swift, right? Also we don't know these people personally!" I said, I let out a sigh and rubbed my temples, going silent for a while. "Look, whatever that is... I won't believe it." I said standing up, putting my hands up with a smile on my face.

Jackie smiles back, understanding what I just told her "Alright, but you know I am just one call away and we can meet up like once or twice a week." Jackie said, standing up again and giving me a hug. I hug Jackie back and nodded "Yeah, just message me if ever." I said, grabbing my bags and finally leaving the apartment.

Forty minutes later, I finally arrived at Hailee's lavish looking house located in Malibu. The house looked amazing from the outside and made me think what's in store inside as well, I parked my car somewhere and grabbed my bags from the trunk. I walked up to the front porch and rang the doorbell, waiting for her to open the door. 

Seconds later, she opens the door for me. Hailee is wearing a pair of black yoga pants, a pair of sneakers and a black sports bra that shows off those toned abs of hers that makes me weak on my knees. She looks so hot, my heart starts racing and a lot of thoughts run through my mind seeing her like that. But I still kept my normal posture in tact to be a little bit professional "Hey, you're here! Come on in." Hailee says, inviting me to enter the house. 

I enter the house with my bags and I look around the place in awe, I knew that her house would look this good even though I've never seen the whole thing. "I'm sorry if I look like this, I just finished working out." Hailee says, leading me to her living room "Make yourself comfortable, Y/N." Hailee says again, I nod with a smile on my face and I sat down on her couch. I just stare at her walk to her kitchen as she grabs a bottle of cold water from her freezer, the way I look at her is filled with admiration and adoration. My little moment was broken when all of a sudden I heard two high pitched barks, I look down to see her yorkies Brando and Martini looking at me, their tails wagging in sync. 

"Oh my goodness, are these Brando and Martini?" I say, smiling at the dogs having some second thoughts if I should pet them both, I am a huge dog person but I have a huge fear of dogs biting me. "Yep, in the flesh! Don't worry they don't bite, they're super friendly." Hailee says, heading to the couch to sit next to me. Hailee puts Brando on my lap and he starts to lick my fingers, which caused me to chuckle and gently pet his head "He's starting to like you, are you a dog person?" Hailee asks. I nod in response as I kept petting Brando while Martini is lying down on my shoe "I have a German Shepard in Washington, his name is... Well... It's a ridiculous name." I said, trying to keep up with an actual conversation with Hailee. 

"Well, what's the name of your dog then?" Hailee asks, her hazel eyes looking into mine. I swear, I get lost in those eyes every time.

"His name is... Sir Tenderloin McAvish the Second... We call him Tendy for short." I answered, Hailee starts to burst out laughing once I told her the name of my family's dog. Her laugh is so contagious, it made me laugh as well "I am dead serious, that's his name." I said, pulling my phone out and showing a photo of Tendy to Hailee. "He's a rescue dog, we got him back in 2003. He's like a big baby." I said, showing her a photo of me and carrying Tendy like a baby. Hailee laughs and smiles at the photo of me and my dog, zooming in the photo to see him up close.

"Well you're not wrong Y/N, I treat these two like they're my own children. Oh wait, that reminds me... Come, I'll show you your room." Hailee says, standing up from the couch. I gently put Brando down on the floor again and watch him run around the living room with Martini, I picked my bags up and followed Hailee upstairs. I continued to admire the interior design of Hailee's house, it looks cozy and comfortable. "Alright, we're here." Hailee says, opening the door of my room for me. I entered the room and looked around, I have a comfortable bed and my own bathroom and TV. 

I sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at her "Thanks, your place is cool. Who's your interior designer?" I asked, Hailee leans against the door frame, crossing her toned arms. "My mom, she's the best." Hailee chuckles and looks at me, "Well I gotta say, your mom is cool. Quick question, have you ever done this before with your past assistants?" I ask, Hailee shook her head in response "Nope, most of my old personal assistants are people older than me cause you know I started this whole acting and music thing at a young age..." Hailee answers, taking a sip of water from her water bottle.

"So I am the first assistant to stay in your place then?" I asks, with a little hint of casualness.

"Yeah, I feel like you're going to be an assistant that will last long." Hailee responds, winking at me with a smirk on her face "Anyway, if you need anything else. Just let me know, this is your home now... Well once you get a place of your own." Hailee says, closing the door of my room.

I flopped down on the bed, lying on my back as I stare at the ceiling, letting out a sigh. Everything is happening all at once, it feels overwhelming but in a very positive manner to say the least. I furrow my brows a bit, looking back as I was looking around the place before heading to my room earlier. 

There was this room at the end of the hallway and it was dark, I didn't ask Hailee about it because it might come off as invasive and I might lose my job. So I just quickly assumed it was a storage room, or a room that has her awards, or a room that has one single box that has her scrapped music or that damn album everyone in the fandom is waiting for. Whatever lies in that room, I'll just ignore it and focus on one thing and one thing only. My job as Hailee's assistant.  

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender - Ch. 41

You, Joel and Ellie make it to the University of Eastern Colorado but you find things you don't expect. A continuation of Lavender ch. 1-40 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon typical violence. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only.

Length: 5.1K

“Don’t rely so much on the reins,” you said, your front pressed to Joel’s back, hands on his waist. “Use your legs and weight to guide her…” 

“Like squeezing?” Ellie asked, frowning. 

“Kind of,” you said. “So if you want to go right, shift your weight right a bit and press your left leg into the horse. Use the reins, too, but you shouldn’t be pulling so much as just guiding her…” 

Ellie nodded and you watched her body shift slightly, taking the horse around in a slow circle. 

“Don’t forget to keep your legs turned inward,” you said. “It’s real easy to let your knees go out, it’s more comfortable, but you’ll have better control if you keep them turned in.” 

“Right,” she said. “I think I got it?” 

“You’re looking good,” you smiled. She smiled back, looking pleased. 

“Never thought I’d be riding a fucking horse,” she said. “This is so cool…” 

“Yeah, not something I ever thought I’d get to do again either,” you rested your cheek in the middle of Joel’s back. He was warm, comfortable. You wrapped your arms around him a little tighter. 

“How’d you learn how to do it?” Ellie asked. “Was it in Texas with Joel?” 

She drew out his name, teasing him. Joel scoffed a bit. 

“She was a better rider than me when she came to Texas,” he said. “Showed me up once on a trail ride, thought I was gonna make myself look real good and it turns out she had to save my ass because I wasn’t payin’ close enough attention…” 

“No way!” Ellie laughed. “What happened?” 

“To be clear,” Joel said. “I’d have handled it just fine if I wasn’t tryin’ to pay attention to her because I didn’t know that she knew what she was doing…” 

“Oh sure,” Ellie nodded, looking skeptical. “So what happened?” 

“It was a trail that hadn’t been used yet that season,” he said. “Just out in the woods near a ranch that belonged to a friend of Tommy’s. I was leading, looking back to try to tell her somethin’ and my horse spotted a snake on the trail, freaked the fuck out, tried to throw me…” 

“Oh shit!” Ellie’s brows went up. “So what’d you do?” 

“Well I saw Joel lost the reins but the horse kept rearing back and trying to throw him,” you said. “So I took mine alongside his and got the reins and got it back down before he got tossed. It’s really not that crazy…” 

“How’d you know how to do that?” She asked. 

“I grew up riding,” you said. “My grandmother was friends with the people who lived next door and they raised horses. They were older, their grandkids lived an hour away and they didn’t get to see them much, so they liked having me around. I rode all the time from when I was about two until I left for college.”

“Well shit,” Ellie nodded. “I’ll just ride with you when things look bad.” 

“You might want Joel more,” you shrugged. “I’ve never tried to ride and shoot at the same time and I’m not a great shot, anyway.” 

“Good point,” she said. “Guess we’ll just all have to stick together then.” 

“Crud,” you sighed. “Such a disappointment..” 

Joel laughed once. 

The three of you had been riding south for more than two days now and it had been almost too easy. You hadn’t seen a single raider or infected anywhere. It’s part of why it had taken you so long to put Ellie on a horse on her own. You didn’t trust the land around you to not suddenly swell with enemies and try to swallow her. With Joel, she’d be protected. With you, you could escape quickly. On her own was too dangerous. 

But now, things felt more secure. You were so far from Jackson and any other sign of civilization that you knew there was almost no chance of infected. Raiders would be pretty useless out here, too - there was nothing to raid. You felt safe letting Ellie ride on her own for a bit. 

“Should rest the horses soon,” Joel said. “Keep an eye out for a good place to stop for the night…” 

Because the road had been easy, you’d made quick progress. Tommy had told you it would take a week to get there but you were on track to make it in just five days. 

You certainly weren’t arguing. You had no idea what was waiting for you at the university. How long you’d be stuck there. Maybe there were researchers there who were far better trained than you - people who went to actual medical school instead of learning at the hands of a military doctor because there was no more medical school to go to. Maybe the Fireflies had found someone from the CDC or the NIH, someone whose job it had been to deal with infectious disease. 

If that were the case, you had your notes. You could pass them off, talk it through with them and rest knowing you’d done what you could. You could go back to Jackson with Ellie and Joel and move into the house across the street from Tommy and Maria. You could take care of the people there as the world healed. You could have a life, be happy. Things that had felt out of reach for almost half your life now. 

If the doctors there were like you - trained to keep people alive but not in how to develop new medications or cure anything new - then you’d have to stay. But only for a while. Joel and Ellie would go back to Jackson and that would be hard but you could figure it out. Being apart for a while would be OK if it meant that you got the world back. You would figure it out from there. 

“OK but I want to use the rifle,” Ellie said as the three of you put some distance between yourselves and the horses to try to catch dinner. Joel sighed. 

“Gonna treat it right?” He asked. 

“Yes,” she rolled her eyes, exasperated. “I’ll be gentle, I’ll love it, act like I’m tryin’ to get it pregnant instead of shoot it…” 

Joel glared at her but slung the gun off his shoulder and handed it to her. 

“Hell yeah,” she smiled. 

The three of you leaned against the remains an old, dilapidated wall looking out into a field. Ellie and Joel were looking out while you faced behind them.

“You’d do well to learn this too,” Joel said, looking at you. 

“I just don’t like killing things,” you winced. 

“You know meat is from dead shit, right?” Ellie said. 

“Yes, thank you for your expertise my dear,” you shook your head and smiled a bit. “Maybe I’ll be vegetarian when we get back to Jackson…” 

“Finally gettin’ to a place where I can grill you a steak and you’re gonna stop eating meat?” Joel shook his head. “Damn shame…” 

“Got one,” Ellie said, lifting the rifle. You covered your ears and she shot. 

“Good job,” Joel said, getting up as you uncovered your ears. “Go get it, we’ll dress it…” 

“Should call it undressing it,” Ellie said, giving him the rifle back. “Undressing it from the inside even….” 

“Good to know we can make her pull the guts out of the turkey at Thanksgiving,” you said, Joel offering you a hand up. You took it. “Give you a break from the job.” 

“The fact that you’ll cut me open, pull out a bullet and stitch me up with no problem but gutting an animal is where you draw the line will always amaze me,” he shook his head a little. 

“Wasn’t exactly thrilled to fish a bullet out of you either, for the record,” you leaned your head on his shoulder and you watched as Ellie walked back toward you, rabbit held high by its hind legs. “She’s a lot like you, you know.” 

He sighed. 

“Yeah,” he said, voice heavy. “Yeah, I know.” 

You glanced up at him. 

“I like it,” you said. 

He scoffed a bit. 

“Someone has to, I suppose.” 

The three of you headed back toward the campsite, an outcropping in some rock that wasn’t overwhelmed by snow. You built a fire while Joel and Ellie dressed the rabbit and you got that oddly happy, domestic feeling in you as you did. Fuck, you hoped the Fireflies had good doctors. You didn’t want to say goodbye to this, not even for just a little while. 

Ellie fell asleep early and you sat close to Joel, the fire glowing and warm. His arm was around you and you were tucked securely against his side. 

“Really startin’ to hold a grudge against winter,” he said. 

“Oh?” You glanced up at him. 

“Real hard to get at any of your skin around all these layers,” he said. You laughed. 

“Someone decided to pick a fight instead of taking advantage of a night we had doors,” you elbowed him lightly. “And working heat. And showers.” 

“I know,” he groaned, dropping his head back against the rock. “I was a damn fool, should have fuckin’ known better…” 

“Really should have,” you teased. He tugged you closer. 

“Just make up for it when we get where we’re going,” you said. “I imagine there are plenty of doors at a Firefly facility…” 

“Test out the sound proofing on all of ‘em…” 

You could hear the smirk in his voice. You tugged the unzipped sleeping bag the two of you were using as a blanket up under your chin and tugged a glove off, lacing your fingers with his. He frowned. 

“You’re gonna freeze.” 

“You’re not the only one who wants a little more skin,” you said. He let your hand go, pulled off his glove, and returned it. His palm was warm, his calluses oddly comforting. 

“Speaking of the night in Jackson,” you said after a few minutes of sitting, quiet, just holding onto each other. “What you said about Tommy…” 

“I shouldn’t have said a damn thing,” he cut you off. “I was being an asshole, fallin’ into old habits with you, stupid shit where I try to get you to leave me because I’m scared and know I can’t leave you…” 

“You know I was only ever with him because I didn’t have you, right?” You asked, sitting up enough to look him in the eye. “Anyone I was with after you was just… It feels wrong to say it but they were just a placeholder. They were someone to keep from hurting too much because I couldn’t have you. 

“It’s not that I don’t care about Tommy,” you said. “I do. A lot. We were always friends, even before anything happened with you and me. But that’s all we were ever really meant to be.” 

Joel nodded slowly, taking a deep breath. 

“That’s how I feel about Tess, too,” he said. You frowned a little and he pulled you closer to him. “She was who I had because I was too afraid of getting hurt with you, I was who she had after her husband died. We were good friends - she was like family - but everything more… it never felt right.

“Baby,” he looked at you, his eyes deep and wide and sad. “I never said it properly but… I’m so sorry. I wasted so much time because I was so fuckin’ scared and it’s time we can never get back. I should’ve gotten my shit together years ago and instead I kept hurtin’ you and fucked up things for everyone. I never should have said what I did in Jackson…” 

“I know how you are when you get scared,” you reached up and knotted your gloved fingers in his hair, pulling his forehead to your own. He closed his eyes for a moment. “I understand it. But Joel, the solution can’t be that you leave. Even if it’s just temporary, even If you say you’ll be waiting for me. We live in a scary world. Even once we get to Jackson and settle, I’m sure there’s going to be times where I’m in danger or Ellie is or you are and you can’t run from it every time. You just can’t, this won’t work if you do. We have to be a team.” 

“I know, Baby,” he kissed you softly, deeply. “I know.” 

***

Joel suggested that Ellie try riding her own horse most of the day as the three of you closed in on the university. It would be good for her to get the experience, just in case she needed to handle a horse on her own. That was the reason he gave for it.

But Joel also really fucking loved sitting on a horse with you wrapped around him. Your arms around his waist, your legs next to his, the warm press of your face against his back when you decided to lean against him. He loved having you close like that, could have drowned in it and died happy, never worried about breathing again. 

Ellie, it seemed, took naturally to riding. Joel had enough experience himself - he’d picked up plenty you didn’t know about in the years before he made it to the QZ - but you were still the better rider and even you were impressed. She connected with the animal well, their bond intuitive and easy. But Ellie, for all her sharpened edges, seemed to do that with any living thing. 

He doubted she was even aware of it. But she’d had you wrapped around her finger for years and by the time the three of you’d made it to Kansas City, Joel was already horrified of what would happen if she got hurt or killed. Now, he knew he couldn’t lose her. Losing either of you was not an option. He’d burn the world down first. 

“Think they’ll let you keep sheep in the backyard at the house in Jackson?” Ellie asked. 

“Dunno,” Joel said. “But I changed my mind on that, anyway.” 

“Yeah?” Ellie asked. “What do you want to do then?” 

“I figure since you’re goin’ to the moon and that one,” he jerked his head back at you. “Is apparently goin’ to Paris, I’m gonna be a singer.” 

“No way!” She laughed. 

“Yup,” he said. He was starting to see signs of the civilization ahead of him. “That was what I wanted to do when I was young. Think I should give it another go.” 

“Were you any good?” She asked, pulling her horse up closer. 

“Ask her,” he nodded back toward you again. 

“He was really good,” you smiled a little. “Played some good guitar, too…” 

“Oh man,” Ellie smiled and shook her head. “I don’t know if I buy it, Doc’s biased when it comes to you…” 

“No I’m not!” You protested. “I’m a perfectly good judge of his talents and skills. He’s a good musician.” 

“Prove it,” she said. 

“Don’t exactly got a guitar on me, kid,” he replied. 

“When we get back then,” she said. “That town has hot water, I bet someone there has a fucking guitar… I’m going to save the fuckin’ world, man, the least you can do is show off those skills.”  

When you got closer to where he thought the university was, he had you and Ellie switch spots. You he could trust to run out of a situation while he provided cover for her. It was the best they could really hope for. 

“I’ll do the talking when we find them,” you said as the university loomed. “Not that they know you, Joel, but hopefully they’ll be receptive toward me…” 

Joel just gave you a stiff nod. His stomach was tight. There was something about this that made him uneasy. It wasn’t even the place, though it seemed oddly quiet for a Firefly base that wasn’t trying to hide from FEDRA. 

It was that this was the end of the journey for the three of you. There was something ominous about that, anything that implied some kind of severance or separation. 

Yes, it seemed that the three of you had decided to stay together after this point even though no one had expressly said that was the plan or why you were doing it that way. But there was uncertainty around this point. How long you would need to stay - and whether or not the Fireflies would fight to keep you if you didn’t agree. Just how long they’d need Ellie. Would they need her here for months, years, to keep drawing samples? He didn’t know how that worked, how any of that worked. What if one of you could go and the other couldn’t? Would you all stay here? Would he take you or her back to Jackson and return for he other one? What would be safest? 

“What does it mean, ‘home of the big horns’?” Ellie frowned as you came upon the entrance to the campus. 

“It’s the mascot,” Joel said. “For the football team and stuff. That one’s a kind of sheep.” 

“Huh,” Ellie said. “Hey Doc, did your school have a mascot?” 

“The Longhorns actually,” you said. 

“Hook ‘em,” Joel smiled a little. You laughed. 

“OK but like… not all of them are horn related, right?” Ellie frowned. 

“No,” you laughed again. “That’s just a coincidence. In Texas there were also the Aggies and the Raiders… Oklahoma had the Sooners. Michigan had the Wolverines. Notre Dame was the Fighting Irish…” 

“Sounds like a lot of bullshit for places people are supposed to be learning stuff,” Ellie said as you worked your way into the campus. 

“Kinda was,” you said. “A lot of focus on the stuff that brought in money, which was usually sports…”

“And plenty of people who went to college weren’t focused on the learning part,” Joel said. “Too busy partyin’ or tryin’ to find themselves to go to class.” 

“I’m guessing that wasn’t Doc,” Ellie smirked a little. 

“You would be correct,” you smiled. “I was a nerd.” 

“You’re still a nerd,” she teased. 

“Darn right,” you said. Joel winked at you. You smiled. 

Joel was starting to actively watch for signs of people but he didn’t see much - at least, no signs of people there now. Plenty of people from the past. 

There was a loud almost squawking sound and Joel tensed for a moment before he located the noise. A troop of monkeys - half a dozen or so - crossing the campus one right after the other. 

“Holy shit,” Ellie breathed. “The fuck are those?” 

“Monkeys,” you frowned. “Whatever you do, do not try to get close to one, they will quite literally rip our face off…” 

“OK but what the fuck are they doing here,” she said. “I thought they were from like… Africa and shit.” 

“Probably leftover from any animal testing labs the school had,” you said. “Or maybe the Fireflies had them… If it was Fireflies, that’s a hell of an operation.” 

“If it was Fireflies,” Joel asked, looking over at you. “Then why the fuck are they loose?” 

“Still,” Ellie said, voice still awed. “Never thought I’d see a monkey.” 

The three of you pressed on, Joel taking the lead until he found some guard posts that had clearly been abandoned. 

“Maybe we should get our guns out,” Ellie said. 

“Found the building at least,” you said, slipping off your horse. Joel and Ellie followed suit and you tied your horses off out front. 

“It’s awful quiet here,” Joel said. “Not sure what the fuck happened but…” 

You and Ellie both nodded. 

He took the lead, putting Ellie in the middle and you at the back as he went for the doors, his gun drawn. 

Inside the building, everything was in disarray. But it was a more recent disarray, something from within maybe the last few weeks, not disarray from when the world ended 20 years earlier. 

“There were doctors here,” Ellie said, stopping at a cart and picking up a vial. She held it out for you and you took it, looking it over. Joel holstered his gun and started rifling through things while you looked over the remains of the equipment. 

“Packing list,” Joel said, holding up a piece of paper. You came over and looked at it, frowning. 

“This is thorough,” you said. “Not a quick jaunt kind of thing, this is a ‘the whole operation is relocating’ kind of list…” 

“So, what, they’re all gone?” Ellie asked. “They just left?” 

Her voice cracked a little and she cleared her throat to cover it. 

There was a noise from inside the building, something clattering to the floor. 

“Maybe not yet,” you said, folding the lacking list and tucking it in your pocket. 

Joel pulled his gun back out and led the way up stairs, moving quietly. There was something behind a lab door, something banging around… He held his arm out to try to keep you back as he opened the door. 

There was a loud screech and a monkey knocked something to the ground with a metallic clatter before it took off through a broken window. 

“Maybe their research turned them into monkeys,” Ellie said. “The comic books finally came true…” 

“Stranger things have happened,” you said, starting to look around the room and see what there was. Joel went to a cork board, one covered in pins and thread. 

“Everything is pointing to Salt Lake City,” he frowned at the map. 

“That’s got to be where they went then, right?” Ellie frowned, standing next to him and frowning up at the map. “How far is that?” 

“A hike,” Joel frowned. “Few hundred miles. It’ll be easier with the horses but…” 

“I just can’t figure out why they’d leave,” you said, coming over to look at the map, too. “Relocating a lab is a bitch. I had to help a professor with it once, years ago. He was setting up some clinical trial and the drug company wanted it on their property, not the school’s and there was so much to do…” 

“Maybe the facilities there are better,” Joel shrugged. 

“Yeah,” you sounded uncertain. 

Joel heard something. He held a finger to his lips as he went to the window and peered out into  the courtyard below. A handful of men - all armed - were walking by. One laughed. His stomach clenched as he looked back to you and Ellie. Your eyes were wide. You’d heard it, too. 

He went back for the two of you. 

“The horses,” you said. “They’ll see the horses…” 

“Out the back,” Joel said. “Stay close…” 

He led the way. The men weren’t inside yet and Joel rushed you both out to the horses, scrambling to untie them from the tree he’d hitched them to. He was nearly done when Ellie grabbed his arm.

“Joel!” She shrieked, her eyes wide. He spun just in time to see a man swinging a wooden baseball bat at him. It cracked against the tree and the man scrambled for you next but Joel grabbed him, wrapping his arm around his neck and pulling back. The man struggled and strained - all dying men do. But Joel was stronger. More desperate. He cracked the man’s neck and he went limp before Joel dropped his body and he crumpled to the earth. 

He turned to face both of you, Ellie’s gun pointed straight ahead, yours aimed at the ground - he’d have to get on Ellie about where to point your fucking gun if you weren’t about to shoot it - when Ellie’s already wide eyes got wider.

“Oh shit,” she breathed, looking at his stomach. 

“Joel,” you reached for him and he looked down. The end of the bat was lodged inside him. He hadn’t felt it until he saw it. Then it was like a switch flipped. He went from feeling normal to the brutal, stabbing pain as his body was ripped open. He went to pull the wood out but your hands covered his. 

“You have to leave it in,” you said quickly. “You’ll bleed out too quick if you pull it out…” 

“Doc, the other guys,” Ellie looked at you. 

“Take the horses…” Joel began, but you ignored him, looping an arm under his and dragging him to the horse. “No, that wasn’t the deal…” 

“Joel I swear to God if you don’t get on this fucking horse I will lay down and die right here,” you snapped. 

He didn’t have it in him to fight you. Instead, he got on, about to tell you to take Ellie but you were already talking to her. 

“Get as far as you can as fast as you can,” you told her. “I’m going to lead them away. I’ll find you. Head for Jackson, but if you can’t make it, I’ll find you, OK? I’ll find you.” 

“But…” Ellie began but you shook your head. 

“You have to get him out of here, Ellie,” your voice was desperate. “You have to, you can do this…” 

“No,” Joel managed as Ellie clambered onto the horse behind him.  

“Hey!” The men shouted. 

You smacked his horse and it took off. Joel looked behind him to see you all but leaping into the saddle of your own horse, pulling your gun and shooting at the oncoming group. He saw you ride away, gun held out, as Ellie pressed the horse on. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been riding. His whole body hurt, the pain radiating out from the stab wound at his stomach. He was fighting to obey your order - to leave the weapon lodged inside him until he was in a position that he wouldn’t bleed out but it hurt. It hurt so fucking bad, the harsh, sharp wood ripping him with every sway of the horse and every breath. 

“Joel?” Ellie’s voice sounded so far away. 

You were so far away. Fuck, he should have stopped you from leaving. Who the hell knew where you were now? You should have stayed with Ellie, should have left him behind while the two of you made it back to Jackson. You could make it that far on your own, after the last week he was sure of it. 

The world tilted. 

“Joel!” Ellie’s words were louder but still far away. “Joel, we’re going to…” 

He slipped then, off the horse and onto the ground. It was cold, hard. The sky was blue. You were far away. Too far away. Why were you so far away? What if you were hurt? What if they’d touched you? What if they took you, what if they killed you… You and Ellie should always be close. It was wrong that you weren’t there… 

“Joel!” Ellie’s hands were on him. “Shit, you have to stay with me Joel, don’t leave me out here alone, please don’t leave me, please stay, please, I’m fucking begging you, I can’t do this alone. I can’t do this without you, I don’t know where I am or how to get to where we’re going, please Joel….” 

The sky was blue. The ground was cold. Ellie was close. You were gone. He wasn’t sure what happened next. 

*** 

You were a shit shot under the best of conditions. It was far worse when you were terrified and on horseback. 

But you still tried. 

The men were on foot at first and you had to go slow enough that they’d stick with you and not follow Joel and Ellie but they’d brought horses, too. And once they were on them, it was a whole other animal. 

You pushed your horse more than you wanted to, trying to put distance between you and the men. You’d have no hope of fighting them off if they caught you. There were half a dozen of them. You couldn’t shoot them all, you’d never have a chance to hit them all before someone got to you. You could only out run them. 

“Good girl,” you stroked your horse’s mane as she slowed to a trot. You couldn’t push her any harder, you could feel it. But you were pretty sure you’d lost them, anyway. “You did so good, we can take a break then we can track them down, OK?” 

You slipped off her back and started looking for something nearby that you could use to get her water. Snow was limited here so you couldn’t just melt some, but you hoped you could find a stream or something to help her with. 

Her breathing calmed and you found a river. She all but dove into it to drink and you held her reins, leaning against a tree, trying to stay calm. 

You had to give your horse a chance to rest otherwise you’d never catch Joel and Ellie, not on foot. But you wanted to move now, wanted to run as fast as you could for them. Joel had been stabbed - the image of it burned into your brain, making your chest clench and stomach knot. But the location could have been worse, it might have missed his kidneys and intestines entirely. With any luck it did. 

Not that you could count on luck. 

“Hey there pretty girl.” 

You jumped, drawing your gun and turning toward the voice. The man was leaning against a tree, not far from you, smiling. There was a knife in his hand. You held the gun out. 

“Stay back,” you warned. “I don’t want to shoot you.” 

“Do we kill her or take her with us?” 

There was another voice, from behind you now, and you spun to face it. 

Shit. 

You were out numbered. You could try shooting them but that was a sure fire way to get yourself killed. 

“Think we take her,” a third man now. Your heart pounded against your ribs. “Think James would be happy for the gift, she looks like his type…” 

“Yeah, she’s not David’s,” someone laughed darkly. 

“Please,” you said. You had to get to Joel, he was stabbed, he was bleeding, Ellie was all but on her own, you had to get to them you had to… “My friends, they’ll be looking for me…” 

“So?” The man from behind you said. 

“I don’t want to cause you trouble,” you said, backing up until you were pressed against your horse. “Just let me go on my way…” 

“Sorry baby doll,” the men were pressing into you from all sides now. “We just can’t do that.” 

One stepped forward and grabbed your gun and, in the instant before one of them started dragging you away, you’d never felt more terrified or more alone.

A/N: Eeeeeeeeeek! The trio is separated, Joel's stabbed, Doc's been taken. It's a whole thing. A whole big, exciting thing :)

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[htchnr]

♰ one and only ༻ ASH WILLIAMS.*ೃ˚

✮ꜜ masterlist. ✮ꜜ buy me a coffee!

content warning getting high ⋆ making out ⋆ not mentioned age gap ⋆ Ash is in his late 40s ⋆ reader in her late 20s ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!

summary requested by the lovely @gilly-billy , may i have Ash x reader where they get high together and indulge in each other on the couch of his trailer?. wordcount 0,8k.

authors note please please please send me more Ash requests y'all!! i love him dearly, and am dying to write some other things besides the small series i'm working on with both younger and older Ash, (i'll have the first chapter out tomorrow, i just gotta edit it) 😁🫠

© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐇𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐍𝐑. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫!

smoke swirls through the trailer, bellowing from between Ash's lips and yours as you sit opposite each other against the side arms of his bed. your legs are tangled together, your head swimming as he drags his flesh hand up and down your leg whenever you have the joint.

he passes you the last hit, heavy eyes watching your closely as you take the last drag. you lean your head back, exhaling slowly. your whole body feels heavy as you lift your head back up, grunting as you move onto your knees to crawl to Ash's side to smother the bud in the ashtray behind him.

you rest a hand on his strong shoulder as you lean past him, your figure bending at the waist. Ash being Ash, had his flesh hand around your waist the moment you neared him. you smothered the bud, leaning back as you allow Ash to pull you into his lap.

you slowly blink at each other, his flesh hand stroking your cheek as his heavy lidded eyes flit across your face. " did'i ever tell you you're gorgeous? " his words slow, a love sick tone twirling through them.

you smile, the skin around your equally heavy lidded eyes scrunching up as your smile widens. one of your hands moves up, holding his cheek as you stroke the feature with your thumb. " maybe, " you grin teasingly.

Ash smiles, " maybe? now that jus' won't do, dollface. " he leans forward pressing his thin lips to your jaw, lazily trailing kisses across your face.

you giggle beneath his lips, leaning in to drape both your arms over his shoulders. with each kiss he mutters something endearing — beautiful, lovely, sweet like honey, always so kind, a sight for sore eyes — he doesn't seem to be able to stop himself.

you giggle, your hands coming up to hold his face to keep it still, pressing your lips against his. you both melt into the kiss, your intoxicated heads swimming with sweet thoughts of one another.

you exhale deeply through your nose, a small smile on your lips as they move against his in a slow, passionate dance. you pull away for a brief second, knocking your forehead against his as you take a deep breath. you giggle, tilting your head to the other side before pressing your lips against his again.

kissing Ash Williams is something you could do for hours on end. his thin lips were gentle against yours, sometimes very eager, but always gentle.

you sighed against his lips, the high upping your sappy feelings as you sat in his lap, his arms around your waist. kissing was something Ash could surprisingly do without getting too, excited. he could hold and kiss you for hours and hours on end if you'd let him.

his flesh hand drags up and down your waist as your lips move together, heads tilting after a bit to switch sides. he notices your figure slouching more and more after a little while, pulling away from the kiss to rest his forehead against yours. " let's lay down yeah, baby? " he offers, his legs already moving beneath you so he can lay you back and hover above you.

he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, stroking your flushed cheek as he admires your features. you lazily swat his chest, " Ash, you sap, you're looking at me like i hung the stars for you, " you giggle.

he lays down beside you, his metal pulling your leg up and draping it over his hip as he pulls you close to him again. " that's 'cause in my eyes, sweet thing, you hung the whole galaxy, " his words slow, but clear.

his sweet lips are on your in an instant again, heavy and intoxicated sighs leaving the both of you as both his and your hands trail across each others figures. you feel like you're melting against him and into his bed, his lips making your intoxicated brain a scrambled mess.

after a while the kiss slows, turning into occasional kisses as the two of you slowly drift off to sleep in each others arms. " 'love you, baby. " Ash's words are slow and a little slurred from the high and the sleepiness.

you smile, nuzzling your nose against his. " i love you too, handsome. " your words barely reaching above a whisper, dreams already tugging you into their swirling depths.

Ash smiles, his heavy eyes drifting across your face as he watches you fall asleep against him. it doesn't take long for him to fall asleep after, the weed mixed with the pure content feelings swirling through him pull him into sleep's embrace quickly.

i love Ash so much y'all 🥹🥹 he's on my mind day and night 🫠

[saturnvs]

hellooo this might be kind of a silly question lol, but do you think you can learn to ride at any age? i've always loved horses but i've never really been around them. i've been contemplating signing up for lessons at this stable thats opened up near where i live, but doing just the bare minimum research into what to expect has me a little overwhelmed lol. since you've been posting about riding again, i was wondering if you had any tips or advice for someone who is a complete beginner :')

yes!! i’m a firm believer that anyone can learn at any age - all you really need is the desire and motivation to learn!

i completely understand feeling overwhelmed. there’s SO much to the entire thing, both regarding the riding itself and handling horses on the ground. i would recommend reaching out to the stable and asking basic questions about their establishment, like what to have in mind as a beginner! all stables have different ways of doing things, and a big part in feeling relaxed as a beginner is knowing what to expect.

i have no experience being a complete beginner at an adult age, but i do of course have experience of returning after many years out of the saddle. something that’s been very important to me is to find out a lot about the place i’ve been going to and most of all, not be afraid to ask questions that might seem silly. it’s much better to ask one time too many, especially in an environment where safety is so important.

if you’re feeling nervous or scared or uncertain - let people know! don’t push yourself to do something scary, instead let the instructor know that hey, this makes me anxious, and i might need some help. that goes for anything, both on the ground and in the saddle!!

as a returning rider i booked myself a private lesson with an instructor to get used to the feeling in a safe environment with no distractions as i find it difficult to be in a group setting. not all stables offer that though, but you can always ask! private lessons aren’t on a weekly basis (at least where i ride), but instead an extra hour of learning that you can have a few times throughout the term.

however, as a complete beginner it’s very beneficial to be in a group. you learn to not only keep track of yourself and your horse, but also how to manage being surrounded by other people on horses! and in a group where everyone is new, you have a chance to make some long lasting friends if you want to. it could also be calming to know that you likely aren’t the only one who is super nervous.

this advice probably is a little diffuse, so please don’t hesitate to ask more specific questions!! id be happy to try to help you.

but in short - talk to them and sign up!! you won’t regret getting to know these precious animals <3

edit: just wanted to add!!! my mother, who had never in her life been on horse before, started riding in her mid-40s and although she stopped after a few years she still thinks of it as one of the best things she ever did!! :’)

[nabateaprodigy]

Hello! Can I request Fire Emblem Heroes King of Faerghus!Dimitri x Summoner!Reader where Dimitri confesses to the Reader by asking them to stay by his side like in his level 40 conversation but Reader thinks he means it more professionally/as an advisor, but ends with them getting together?

A King and his Summoner

Series: Fire Emblem.

Character: King of Faerghus!Dimitri.

Genre: Fluff.

Proofread: Yes.

Reader: Summoner!Reader.

Notes: Reader is Gender Neutral.

Ever since Dimitri had been summoned to Askr it had been something new and unexpected for him. His friends and loved ones were there. Along with other versions of himself and his friends!

It took him a while to adjust to this new kingdom and see different versions of his friends. However, Dimitri had someone there for him since he arrived to adjust to this new kingdom.

Who was that someone? Why it was you of course! Ever since you summoned Dimitri you and him grew with each other and developed a deep bond with one another.

From helping him in battle after battle and defeating countless foes. To help him understand how even ended up in Askr and explain things he was unfamiliar with.

Dimitri and you had been there for each other and became very close over time. Although lately, Dimitri had been thinking something over as of late. It's about you and how he felt towards you.

Dimitri valued his and your time together but wanted more for you and him to spend every day together. So he planned to tell you how he felt as he planned to with you later in the day. The time was quickly approaching so he left to speak with you at the location he told you to meet at.

When Dimitri arrived he already saw you there waiting for him. "Ah, summoner thank you for taking the time to speak with me," Dimitri spoke already relaxing by being near you.

"Of course, Dimitri getting to spend any more time with you. Is something I'd take the opportunity to do!" Always so kind and honest Dimitri liked that about you.

"There is something rather important I would like to speak with you about." He spoke again struggling to find his words. However, after some time he finally finds the words to say.

"When you summoned me here to Askr I had already been crowd King back home in Faerghus. But even as a King I continue to grow and learn new things. So far here in Askr all of that has been thanks to you summoner."

He paused for a moment before speaking once again. "Please summoner stand by my side and help me become a king Faerghus can be proud of!" He spoke now awaiting your response.

"But I already have been Dimitri! For the entire time, I have had you here with me. There was no need to speak with about this!" You let a chuckle after finishing what you said to him.

That...was not the response he was expecting maybe he should be more direct? Yes surely by being more direct about what he truly says and what he is feeling! "Ah of course summoner but I meant it in a different light."

"I wish for you to stand by my side as my king/queen. So that with you by my side I will have all the support and love I need. For the people of Faerghus to have a king they can be proud of."

You were stunned for a moment unsure of what to say. However, after a while, you gathered your thoughts and gave a response to Dimitri. "Oh, Dimitri so that's what you meant. Then yes I'll be your king/queen and stand by your side. By being with you I'll show Faerghus how lucky they are to have such an amazing king."

Dimitri smiled as he embraced you in a hug. "Thank you summoner you've truly made me a happy king. I love you." You hugged Dimitri. "And I love you too Dimitri."

[eyeofhurakana]

Title: “Bouncing Brings Us All Together” Chapter: 2/3 Pairing: Sampo x Reader Reader: Gender Neutral / Nurse at Natasha’s clinic Relationship Level: Acquaintances with unspoken attraction Trust: Moderate Summary: It’s your day off and you want to take the cable car to Overworld. The only issue is that all the seats are taken up, and it’s going to be a long and bumpy ride. However, Sampo seems to have nabbed a seat…  

[Chapter 1]

What a conundrum...

You could give a value without thoroughly thinking about it. It’d definitely save time. But how much would a seat that’s normally free even be worth? Is he really even that attached to it? Would you look silly or immature for saying the wrong thing? 

Sampo has crossed his legs with his gloved hands resting on his knee. He is still grinning from ear to ear with great interest. Emerald green eyes watch with rapt attention. He’s genuinely curious as to what your first offer will be. 

“Tick tock~. This cable car won’t stay here forever, you know,” he reminds you.  

Just as he says that the overhead intercom blares another announcement, “All passengers, please remain seated. The cable car is now en route to OVERWORLD. All passengers, please remain seated. The cable car is now en route to OVERWORLD.”

The pressure is mounting. 

“20 shields!” 

You went with your gut, but the idea of losing twenty shields still feels a bit icky. 

Oh well. So maybe you’ll forgo eating anything in Overworld. But at least your legs won’t suffer myalgia. Plus the live music is free. And no one ever charges to look at flowers. 

Or at least, this is what you tell yourself to cope. 

“Mm… Just 20?” Sampo replies with an unconvinced pout, “You suuuure about that?”

Your mouth falls open slightly. 

Was twenty really not enough? Your eyes search him for any sign of mischief or deceit, but he’s a difficult read. Maybe you could add another five shields… 

The cable car jerks forward. 

Panic sets in.

You want that seat.

“Gah, 40 shields!” 

Sampo looks upwards to the side again, calculating it out in his mind, before shaking his head. 

“Mm, nuh uh.” 

He won’t even accept doubling your previous offer? Ohhhh, Natasha was definitely going to hear about this. Maybe you could even put it through the Wildfire grapevine for Seele to hear too. The fiasco born out of that would definitely teach him.  

“Sampo…” you say with your face burning up a little, “I can’t go any higher than that.” 

“Oh really?” Sampo asks slyly with an arched brow, “Correct me if I’m wrong, but you definitely seem to be carrying much more than you’re willing to offer. Isn’t having this seat important to you? Come on~.”

He’s trying to goad you into going higher, but it backfires. Your face turns stern while your hand hovers protectively near where you keep your shields. 

“It seems I won’t be able to afford it then. That’s fine. Enjoy the trip to Overworld,” you say flatly.

It’s too late now anyway. The cable car has already commenced its ascent. Your legs submit to their unwanted responsibility of having to support you at an insufferable thirty-five degree incline for the next few hours. It's a miserable feeling.

One day you might make it up to them… So long as they don’t give out first. 

Time to migrate again.

You weren’t going to stick around here and let Sampo wheedle you into needless spending. 

Of course, it’s not until you seem very set on moving away that the businessman starts showing signs of nervousness.  

“Wait, hang on a second! No need to leave,” he insists urgently. 

Despite his words, you’re still turning your head about for a route to meander through the dense crowd. As he said before, time is ticking. He quickly uncrosses his legs, leaning forward to grab your wrist. His large gloved hand engulfs it completely, surprising you. 

What else could such big strong hands do? 

Nope. No, no. You’re not going there. 

This is a tactical retreat in progress. 

“Heeeey! What’s the hurry?” Sampo asks with a slight waver in his voice. 

When he notices your grim expression, his face softens almost immediately.  

“I… haven’t offended you, have I? If I have, do let me know. I can’t stand the thought of displeasing a custo- Er, friend.”

You eye him warily for a moment. 

Naturally, he uses the moment to give you his trademark sad puppy eyes. If you give it time, he might even throw in a whimper or two. 

Despite the shamelessness of his gesture, the charged feelings inside your chest dissipate at the sight. It’s strange. You can’t stay mad at him. You even realize that you might be overreacting. 

After all, it’s just a seat. Right?

No. It’s not.

Time to turn the tables.

“Friend, huh?” you reply with light skepticism as you pull your wrist back to fold your arms, “I guess I must be your least favorite friend then.” 

He gasps back at you as though you uttered the largest fallacy in all of Belobog. 

“Whaaaat? Of course not! What would ever make you think that? Did someone tell you that? I want their name. How dare they tell my dearest friend such lies. Your companionship is invaluable to me. I could never imagine myself without it. If that were to happen, then I would be a poor man indeed. So do tell me who put this slander in your head. I will do my utmost to set the record straight,” he tells you with so many theatric tones and gestures that you can’t help but crack a bit of a smile.  

You shake your head at him. What a goofball. 

“Well, no one else said anything to me… Though you did,” you reply with a pointed look.   

“Wha… Me? What did I do?” 

He’s genuinely confused. You can practically see him scrolling in his own mind, recounting every word that was said during the conversation. His eyes flit side to side as he struggles to find where he went wrong. "Wait, was it the-? No... You wouldn't be upset at that... Then..." he murmurs both to himself and a bit toward you. You could leave him like this... 

But that would be mean. 

Besides… you kind of still really wanted that seat.  Though you would have to play a little dirty.

“Really, Sampo? Not a single discount offer? Good friends always offer sweet discounts,” you say, falling in with the theatrical mood, “Not to mention that I’m a nurse. No discounts for even my noble line of work? You must think so lowly of me… To think that all those times I helped patch you up back when you were too scared of Natasha would end up meaning so little to you.” 

You make a mock sniff.

Since the cable car is relatively stuffed to the brim with people, it’s not hard for folks standing right next to you to overhear the conversation. Barely anyone is talking save for a few hushed voices. Most people have their eyes either out the windows or down to the floor in silence. However, at your sudden rise in voice, a few heads start to turn with interest. 

The thoughts scurrying through their minds are obvious. Is that blue-haired scoundrel antagonizing that poor nurse? Why doesn’t he simply give up the seat? Do they know each other? Are they arguing?    

Sampo sits there beneath a deluge of prying eyes. His smile is getting strained, yet his eyes shine with… happiness? 

Are you missing something? 

You’re clearly causing a scene. Why is he so happy about it? 

Oh no… 

“You knooow, you could have always just used the free option,” he offers teasingly as if such an option had been available the entire time, “We are good friends, after all. Honestly, I’m so perplexed as to why you didn’t just pick that in the first place. It’s always available to you.” 

“Free option?” you parrot in disbelief only to feel the cable car jerk forward yet again.

However, this time, it’s the hardest you’ve ever felt. It takes everyone in the car by utter surprise. Everything happens so fast that you can’t react in time. You get thrown forward into Sampo with a yelp. 

Without any delay, Sampo reaches up and firmly catches you by the elbow and hip before you could faceplant into the solid steel wall above him. Your knee finds purchase on the front of his seat, narrowly avoiding his family jewels. A few others aren’t so lucky as several folks knock into one another while others fall completely. 

It’s chaos. 

The once hushed cabin is suddenly abuzz with activity. 

You even manage to catch a glimpse of a bit of smoked olm rolling helplessly across the floor. Someone’s black coffee managed to spill adding yet one more unnecessary scent to the cabin. Long dark streaks travel down the floor and onto people's shoes. Even some money fell to the floor, yet remarkably not a single soul made an effort to snatch it.   

No, the people of Underworld are a hearty bunch as they help one another back up with surprised smiles and relieved laughter.  

Total strangers become sudden acquaintances and the cabin becomes much more chatty. Parents pull on their children, suddenly very grateful to have them safe and sound. People that would have never exchanged words are now exchanging names and experiences.   

“You all right?” Sampo’s voice cuts through your frazzled thoughts. 

You’re still trembling a little from the fright of that sudden lurch. 

That’s never happened before. 

“Almost knocked your head there. What a shame that would have been. A bruise on that pretty little head of yours? No way. Not on my watch,” he says protectively with a proud grin while helping steady you.

He even deepens his voice a little more to really give off the ‘noble protector’ vibe. You wonder if this is his attempt at a Gepard Landau impression. 

A tiny laugh escapes you. Your shaking ceases as you calm down. He’s such a clown, but you're grateful for it. What could have been a terrible situation ends up becoming nothing more than a funny mishap. 

You instinctively grip his forearms to get your feet back on the dusty metal floor while avoiding the still-rolling olm. Heat resonates from his bare skin and into your cold fingers. His whole body must be a bit of a furnace, constantly exuding warmth. He must make for a great personal heater on chilly nights… 

Quickly, you squash that blasphemous thought. 

He just saved you from a concussion. No need to objectify the man. 

Though you wonder if he’d mind…  

“I’m good. Thanks for the assist. I rather not have my first order of business in Overworld today become an emergency visit to the local hospital or dentist.” 

Sampo chuckles back at you, that charming smile of his growing ever more powerful. 

You then recall what he had mentioned before.

“Hey, I feel like I might regret asking… but I’m gonna do it anyway. So what’s the free option?” 

His whole face suddenly lights up. 

It appears he nearly forgot too. 

“I’m so glad you finally asked! You see… I realized there was a way for us both to win in this scenario. You know, since we’re good friends and all.”

Why does he keep saying it like that?  

“Being?” you ask while still harboring a hint of skepticism.

“Cue the drum roll!” he says excitedly while pretending to do air drums, making the sound with his mouth, before suddenly pointing his imaginary drum sticks at you, “We share it!”  What?

You eye him as if you watched his brain literally dislodge itself from his skull in order to go into witness protection. Or was that your brain? 

Nonetheless, this is beyond ridiculous. But in a way, did you really expect much different?  

“...Share how?” you ask as you feel your shins already burning from the neverending incline, “You take up nearly the whole-”   

Sampo then pats his lap all too welcomingly. 

"Well?" he asks with a playful smirk.

"You know there's no better deal than this..."

AN: *cackles* Yes... Yesssss...

Ring-a-ding-ding~! New chapter!

@hearts4saebyeok

[procrastinatorproject]

29, 39, and 40 for the Star Trek asks, please. ✨

Thank you so much for the questions!

29. Favourite and Least Favourite Episodes:

Ooooh, good question! Let's start with the negativity so we can end on a high note 😅

I... honestly would put most of Picard seasons 2 & 3 in the "least favourite" category 🙈 If I had to pinpoint some lowlights, it'd be "Fly Me to the Moon". It's not a bad episode in itself and in isolation, I might not mind it, but the two times I watched through season 2 in order, this was the episode where I found myself crying and/or shaking with rage and disappointment when it was over. Probably becuase it really drives home that they're serious about where they're going with this series I used to love and it's not somewhere I can follow.

Disregarding that... I have a terrible memory for this kind of thing 😅 And I guess it depends on what you mean by "least favourite".

I think one objective measure to use: I don't ever want to see the ENT mpreg episode again, where everyone acts like Trip Tucker having his bodily autonomy violated in a horrendous way is The Funniest Shit™. That has seared itself into my brain so much that when I was rewatching all of TNG, DS9, VOY, and ENT to take notes for the holo-tech database, it's actually the only episode I wanted to skip.

There are also some real bombs in season 1 of TNG, and some of the Ferengi episodes in DS9 are firmly on my "no thank you" list. But yeah, I think the involuntary mpreg takes the cake, honestly.

Now for the much funner part: There are SO MANY episodes I truly love! DS9's "Take Me Out to the Holosuite" and "Badda-Bing Badda Bang", PIC's "Broken Pieces", VOY's "Concerning Flight" (which is apparently controversial?), "Drive", "Bride of Chaotica!", also any VOY episode that has Naomi Wildmann in it...

There are also A Ton of Deep and Dramatic episodes I love, but from my instinctive answers I'm realizing that what draws me to an episode as a "favourite" is apparently "It's fun!" (and likely involves the holodeck? 🙈🤣) So yeah, if we're talking favourite, not best, it's probably something along these lines.

39. You have to relocate to a planet other than Earth, which do you choose?

Hm, that's a tough one. I feel like not that many planets readily spring to mind, so I'll have to really think about this.

It'd probably be near the centre of the Federation for that sweet, sweet post-capitalist utopia (and also because my family is presumably still on Earth and I want to be able to visit Very Frequently.

Vulcan is a big No, because my body does not function above 25° C🙈 I love snow and ice, though, so Andoria might be a real option (though not technically a planet, I guess 😋).

Beyond that, I'm honestly drawing a blank. I think I haven't seen enough TOS/TNG in a while, so I don't remember too many worlds they visited. But yeah, probably somewhere that's close to the Sol, close to the centre of the Federation, has good temperate-to-colder climate to live in... In the end, it would probably very much depend on why I'm relocating and whom with.

40. If you got a Trek inspired tattoo, what would it be?

Another tough one 😅 I don't have any tattoos and don't think I'll ever get any. For one, I'm way too scared of that kind of long-term commitment, but also my skin has Issues™ and I don't know how long a tattoo would look decent.

If I were to get one, though? Let's be honest, it would be some version of the Sirena logo. That little ship has shaped my life in ways more profound than I can even say. Sirena and her crew got me to write again after over a decade, gave me so, so, SO much joy, not to mention all the incredible, wonderful friends I foud along the way (that's you!)

I think for me, Sirena stands for found family, friendship, healing, creativity, allowing myself to feel joy in my nerdiness and head for new adventures. So yeah.

If not that, probably some variation of IDIC, either the symbol or the saying in Vulcan script 🤔

--

This was fun! Thank you so much for the asks! And if anyone else wants to know more:

Send Me Star Trek Asks 💗

[semi-imaginary-place]

more job quests

paladin: mylia got friendzoned and solkwyvewrbjn didn't shwo hsi face. a good day. wow they totally pretended the paladin quests just didn't exist (tbf they were bad)

warrior: did we ditch curious gorge who going to be stuck on a ship to the far east for who knows how long. is it me or have the warrior quests gotten progressively more goofy like the maurader ones were pretty serious.

dark knight: esteem totally wrote that letter. are we going to end up in whitebrim? was gundobald one of the one's to witness one of the pc's very public mental breakdowns? *slaps roof of wol* this bad boy can hold so many personalities. fray/esteem, myste, ardbert, the reaper demon, im forgetting someone

monk: oh yeah wasn't widergelt revealed to be a secret prince or something. "please wait for me half way on the other side of the continent" huh weren't they going back to ala ganna anyways. hi lyse. i thought we were setting up a provisional government. how's that going. YES YES YES I am so happy about this, was a little disappointed this didn't happen in sb but i guess it's the structure of the quest system. these are made to be done after 5.0 those were meant to be flexible enough to be done during 4.0. rhalgr's reach is THE temple of the fist of rhalgr and the Resistance is there and I wanted widergelt to go there so badly.

dragoon: baby orn kai

ninja: there's no way this works. karasu better not fake his death a 3rd time. or well tht could be pretty funny actually. spiderman meme. uhh i choose underpants boy. eyyy got that one right i wasn't sure. and the adventures continue. nin is different in that way in the others so way have been about wrapping up loose ends or more like an encore.

samurai: i forgot this storyline.

white mage: a alaqua the worst job questline in the game. what do you mean she wasn't able to take down a treant wasn't the whole thing about how powerful a mage she was. also e sumi still sus af for letting sylphie roam around and take charge of the gatty situation. sooo we're not gonna talk about her dead family at all?

scholar of all jobs is the only one to have combat. i forgot about setoto and h=may have gotten her confused with surito carito

astrologian: so between 3.x and 5.x is less than a year. i'd say this is a deviation from all the politics of 30-50-60 but this did all start with janne's crush on her dad. my aro queen. wish this had more to do with sharlayan as that shows up in 6.0 but well she did fake her death. hope grandpa is ok.

machinist: hilda! I wanted to her to show up in a mch quest. oh hey i have to kill something again remember the bad ol' days where ever job quest was to go kill something

black mage: i feel like the game usually forgets dewlala exists

did the writers forget that cocobuki is like half yayake's age. i don't exactly remember but buki's like 27 and yayake's in her 40s. because buki was never this rude.

summoner once again continues to be the most msq relavent job despite never being featured in the trailers. smh and with the ascian saga ended with ew the devs lost their chance for a summoner meteor. that is the question someone is born (or made in foldora's case also offies zenos also has that implanted echo) to do something well, should they do what they're good at or not?

red mage: still think arya should have minmaxed into thaumaturge/black mage. wow how come its all the magic jobs that get combat. what's to stop other tomb robbers?

wow we really did tell the whole realm that there's multiple worlds and we went to one.

did you know that if you rotate your character near a wall at just the right angle you can see that they are empty inside except for the floating insides of their mouth?

role quest capstone

doing the job capstone. see this is a weird take because up until this point we are led to believe that it was the decimation of the First's native dark aether that unbalanced the shard to light. but here the shadowkeeper is revealed to be from another world (the 13th?). yeh 13th, wasn't that like thousands of years ago tho, well source time who knows about 13th time but that doesn't explain how she's still alive. ah she's echo'd too and friends with unukalhai wonder how he's doing..

these 2 statements seem to contradict each other. is Cyella talking about a symbolic radiance because she was trying to lose. instead of Cylva's death the Flood was triggered by by ardbert killling mitron and longhrif. im assuming cylva was the bait so that the ascians could better control the flood and bring the shard "to the brink" instead of over it as she puts it. ardbert and co then killed themselves and jumped shards. ascians got vauthy to transform the party's corpses into cardinal virtues. time continues to be a mystery. why is she alive. huh her goal was to kill them... uggg i nned to think this over

hmm but the lightwardens didn't have that thrall effect. but then again everyone who came close died. cant tell if sin eater conversion is related or not. oh his dialogue predicts going to the first. should have talked to him earlier woops