#please add on I can’t suffer with my excitement alone

[goferwashere]

PUNCH-OUT!! (Wii) MONSTER AU 🗣️💥

FIGHTING FOR YOUR FUCKING LIFE IN THIS RING. LETS GO ��🔥

It’s a bit long so I added a cut 😭 I spent the past three days on this

THIS IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE BUT OH LORD I FORGOT HOW MUCH FUN MAKING AU’S IS

ALSO PLEASE PLEASE ADD MORE HC’S AND STUFF IF YOU HAVE ANY

Please just assume that just about every monster on this list comes with super strength unless stated otherwise.

Glass Joe:

Human - Monster Hunter/Boxer

- Wants to retire, but knows that without him some of the more unruly and dangerous monsters would dominate the circuit.

- Not everybody knows that *he’s* the infamous monster killer within the WBVA. Some do, but he doesn’t want it to be common knowledge. He needs the edge of “Poor, weak Glass Joe” to get the jump on his opponents.

- He doesn’t kill often, only if things get extremely out of hand. He’s basically the only thing keeping the humans and monsters from starting a full out war in the WVBA.

- Despite his job, He’s friends with a couple of the other boxers. Some knowing that they were monsters, some that he assumed were human and were actually monsters, and some that were just human.

- He doesn’t have anything against monsters, only those who try to take advantage of their power.

- He still trains and goes into the ring, trying to enjoy himself. To be fair, he does still enjoy boxing despite everything else he’s doing. Even if his record does stand at 1-99.

- On that note, his one win wasn’t an accident. He fully intended to win that fight, lacing Nick Bruisers gloves with Garlic so he’d be fighting with his hands essentially on fire.

- Even though he’s got a serious job, he far from a serious guy most of the time. He’s friendly with just about everybody, and tries to be civil with the people who treat him like shit.

- He’s also still clumsy. Almost died a few times as a result.

Von Kaiser:

Vampire - Boxer

- Being turned during his military service, he’s gotten good at hiding the obvious signs. He covers his bite mark and eye bags, and excessively dyes his skin using turmeric. (It fades fast though, leaving his skin looking a healthy colour.)

- Claims he has a garlic allergy, which makes him sad because he quite enjoyed garlic before turning.

- Enjoys the perks of being a vampire, but just can’t seem to keep up with the amount of blood his body demands. So he often twitches and looses focus, being sluggish and tired quite often.

- He enjoys the chase when tracking down his prey. It makes him feel powerful.

- Is 100% on the monster’s side. He believes that they’re superior, and will often be snarky with the human boxers (even if they’re ranked higher than him).

Disco Kid

Human (Possessed by Kid Quick) - Dancer/Boxer

- Disco is being possessed by the ghost of a boxer that was killed during one of his matches (yes that’s his unfinished business)

- Whenever he’s doing anything involving boxing, that’s Quick’s doing, but personality wise that’s always been Disco

- Disco is surprisingly chill with it, always wanting to try boxing but never having patience to train (so Quick does it for him lol)

- His personality leaks into Quicks movements and taunts, since despite liking boxing he’s got ‘no flair’ (As Disco puts it)

- Doesn’t have any super strength, but if they work together they can pull of some nasty combos, with Quick grabbing them and pushing them into Disco’s attacks (Disco isn’t a huge fan of that though, so it’s only really a last resort.)

- He’s honestly nervous when he finds out about the monsters in the WVBA. Quick assures him that they’ll be fine as long as they keep their heads down.

-…Which of course, Disco would never do. So when he gets mixed up in the drama he doesn’t really have anyone to blame but himself.

- He knows that he should *technically* count as a monster, but him and Quick are in support of the humans.

King Hippo

Tulpa - Boxer

- He was created by a little boy who loved boxing, and created him. Giving him a backstory and a cool design. He thought about him so much that he just. Spawned one day.

- The only thing on his mind was boxing, so that’s what he did. He has no idea that he was just a figment of some random kid’s imagination, but I doubt he’d care (or believe it) if he was told. His only goal is to box.

- Not really involved in any of the WVBA human/monster drama. He’s rather quiet outside of the ring.

- Nobody is really clear what he is, but everyone has mutually agreed that he’s not human. No way.

Piston Hondo

Human - Boxer

- Everyone who knows him has a lot of respect for Hondo. He fights fair, and his technique was able to beat actual superhumans (granted, some of those wins may have circumstantial).

- Some of the other boxers are really confused as to how he can keep his ranking, and make speculations as to how he does it, but no one can come up with a solid theory.

- Unless he’s exposed to be a dirty trickster like Ryan, or doped up like Soda, everyone just has to respect the insane effort he puts in.

- Hondo is oblivious to the fact that the WVBA is infested with monsters, and has always thought that international boxing would naturally have more difficult opponents. Nobody knows what would happen if he found out, but nobody wants him give up if he did. Just about everyone (regardless about what side they’re on) will band together to keep Hondo in the dark.

Bear Hugger

Werewolf - Boxer

- He’s more or less happy with being a werewolf. Obviously he’s mad when he has to lock himself up during the full moon, but otherwise he’s chill.

- Essentially a Disney princess with how well he gets along with wildlife. Like. It’s actually insane.

- Thought he’d do well in boxing, so quite literally trained with bears before going to NY. He thinks it’s noisy and polluted, but stays to hopefully bring down the champion and take the belt home to show his friends.

- Cheers on everyone, regardless of what they are. He doesn’t really care about the fate of the WVBA and is just there for a good time.

Great Tiger

Human - Informant/Boxer

- A skilled magic user. He’s been learning since he was a little kid, and the jewel on his turban gives him a good chunk of extra power.

- Uses his tricks to get intel and feed it to Joe.

- He *LOVES* to stir the pot. He knows that he’s safe, and may even stick out his neck for Joe, but will never do anything that’ll put himself in harms way.

- In the same vein he’s always listening to drama. He will gossip like a high schooler, and he knows everything about everyone. He loves being cheeky and keeping other boxers in the dark about what he knows.

- Literally the personification of “🎶I know something that you don’t know~🎵”

- He’s basically on an even playing field, so has no trouble keeping his place in the major league. Honestly, he’s more in it to see how this drama will play out, and who’ll come out on top.

Don Flamenco:

Siren - Matador/Boxer

- He very much using his ability to charm people all the time.

- This includes getting the ref to give him decision wins (even if he doesn’t deserve it), and always to leave a good first impression on just about everyone he meets.

- Yes, sometimes it’s also to pick up ladies (and men? Sometimes? Depends on his mood…) but will never go too far with it.

NOTE: While I think it would be totally in character for him to sleep with them, I don’t want that for him since that’s not consensual. so let’s say that despite seeing humans as lesser he doesn’t want to cross that line. (For his *own* sake of course. The last thing he would do is use tricks to woo “lesser creatures” to bed with him.)

- He’ll whisper under his breath after taunting, convincing the opponent to throw the match. But he’s not great at it, and will sometimes encounter someone who doesn’t have great hearing. He usually loses those matches.

- Wants an all-monster WVBA. He can manipulate just about anybody, and generally sees humans as lesser (Unless they’ve proven to him otherwise, like Joe and Hondo) so he wants them out.

- He’s very charming and friendly, but if you get on his bad side he is NASTY. Like ruin all your relationships and steal yo girl/man nasty. (He keeps all that under wraps though, he can’t have his image be tarnished.)

Aran Ryan:

Human - Boxer

- To everyone’s surprise, he’s actually human. But for all the craziness he projects out in the ring, he’s a smart guy.

- He taunts boxers by trying to get them to hit him because he knows that one wrong move and they’d expose themselves. If they hit him too hard (he figures that one punch would be enough to kill him with their strength) he might die but knows that it’ll be hell to pay for their opponent as well.

- Same with the headbutts, it throws them off their rhythm because they need to react, even if they didn’t feel it.

- That’s why he cheats, because he knows that without it he’d stand no chance.

- But still, you can’t be asking people you know could kill you easily to hit you and be mentally stable. He’s still eccentric about making it as a boxer, this is just an extra challenge to him.

- Has a disdain for monsters, and will do just about anything he can to gain in upper hand in those fights. That flail has gotten him out of a few sticky situations.

Soda Popinski:

Human - Boxer

- He can only compete fairly (at world circuit level at least) because he’s doped up to hell and back.

- Way into the idea of the ‘indomitable human spirit’. He truly believes that human ingenuity can overcome any challenge, and this is no exception.

- He 100% wants to get monsters out of the WVBA. But because he knows that he’s already got a big enough target on his back for cheating he can’t make a big fuss publicly.

Bald Bull:

Minotaur - Boxer

- Nobody’s really sure where he came from, but some people have seen him in his Minotaur form and that’s been enough for the others to accept them onto their side.

- He’s close with a lot of the other monsters, and follows along with their plan to have monsters take over the WVBA circuits. He only does so for them, he doesn’t have a personal agenda.

- This is the first place he’s really felt accepted, so will do what his friends ask of him even if he isn’t entirely on board with it.

- That said, he does belittle the human competitors quite often. To their face and while they aren’t present.

Super Macho Man:

Dragon - Supermodel/Bodybuilder/Boxer

- Got tired of living in a cave, and made it to LA to see what had become of humanity.

- By god, he loved it. He’d chosen a particularly handsome form (even though he didn’t know it at the time) and loved the attention he got from the ladies. He quickly picked up on our customs and had plenty of gold to sell (after years of hoarding it up in a mountain somewhere, he figured that now was the time to use it).

- Always wears enchanted golden jewellery, because the last thing he wants is for his facade to slip. He doesn’t need all of it, but to him it’s a necessary precaution.

- He can breathe fire. He does it often as a party trick, and has even figured out how to change its colour.

- His skin is also very hot to the touch. You’d think he was always just finishing with an intense workout.

Mr. Sandman:

??? - Boxer

- Nobody knows, and nobody is brave enough to ask. He seems to beat monsters with relative ease, so everyone assumes he must be one as well, but nobody can figure him out.

- Everyone wants to keep him out of what’s happening, because he’s a loose canon. Nobody knows who’s side he belongs to and nobody wants to find out they’re his enemy.

PLEASE HELP ADD ONTO THIS IF YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS BECAUSE IM EXPLODING OVER THIS

[pretendfan]

Jake Peralta x F! reader

Almost as if by magic officer Jake Peralta was gifted decent coffee at work practically every day, and it always put him in a good mood courtesy of you his desk buddy, only he still had yet to realise why this was actually happening much to their squads mutual annoyance.

Until Jake spots another guys name and digits on his styrofoam cup at first acting indifferent, but soon realising he’s jealous so it’s time to do some detective work of his own, and get to the bottom of this mystery…

{Coffee is for closers}

~Two~

Thanks to falling back asleep again after your alarm you were feeling both flustered and annoyed, unable to start this day just right you were already in a bad mood, which follows you all the way to the subway station and even to the elevators in the precinct.

Without your nice coffee in hand you would have to suffer the offering in the break room, which was usually cheap and old having been left out in the pot for too long, the thought of drinking that alone enhances your mood towards the negative ten fold.

Add to this the fact that Jake wouldn’t be arriving into work until after lunchtime, you weren’t looking forward to this shift at all especially seeing how you had to go back out with Rosa, yet again the memory of yesterday afternoon reappearing in your mind.

Julius had been very surprised to see you twice in one day, it was usually unheard of yet there you were and your once favourite barista had even more to say, which went in one ear and out of the other because you weren’t confident enough to follow it through.

In a work situation you found spending time with Jake fine, the pair of you worked well and it got the job done, but to approach him socially the very idea made you want to run in the other direction, afraid of rejection or even worse your desk buddy laughing in your face.

This very notion alongside the elevator doors opening super slowly, you welcome the distraction that falls upon you when Boyle appears wearing a pair of white feathery wings, over his work clothes with a silver halo headband to complete the look.

“Is this an undercover outfit or is it Halloween again?” You ask him with a smile as he shakes his head with an excited giggle.

“I was just checking out lost property and came across these wings don’t they look good!” Boyle explains with a wink and a wiggle of his shoulders, as if he was about to take off in flight.

“They look something-“

“Boyle, if I can’t say the things that are occupying my thoughts right now I’m gonna go insane!” Gina cuts in with an exasperated look on her face but clocking you it changes instantly.

“Wow, you look so bad can I talk about just how bad you look right now instead?” Gina shouts grabbing onto your arm, whilst ignoring the phone at her desk which was ringing loudly.

“Please don’t-“

“Boyle please take off that outfit it’s distracting others.” Terry asks with a sharp look at his colleague, desperately trying not to laugh which was proving hard so he turns around instead.

“I can’t work in these conditions!” Gina yells as she stalks back over to her desk, snatching the offending phone up off its cradle in record speed.

Boyle was definitely on some kind of high all morning, seeing how he still hadn’t removed those damn wings which had now put Terry in a bad mood, yet the officer persisted much to your annoyance.

Gina meanwhile was sending messages to the group chat that even had Boyle in, so he could read her hurtful words as she went full-Linetti, giggling as she furiously typed on her keyboard with the whole office rolling their eyes.

You smirk to yourself as you start to think of Jake defending Boyle, at first of course but then even adding a few teasing comments himself, because he never went as far as Gina nobody could ever match her sarcastic prowess even you it truly was a gift sometimes.

Luckily Holt was out of the office for meetings which meant that Terry was in charge, trying to control Boyle who was truly in such an annoying mood, which is proven when the sergeant carries the smaller officer off into the break room with apparent ease.

“Can you carry me around next?” Gina asks Terry from across the office but he fails to respond with an answer.

You roll your eyes then notice the look on Rosa’s face, making you stand up from your desk ready to roll because your colleague also looked super pissed, which meant the current investigation they were on had hit a problem.

“I don’t like the alibi that Mrs Rose had and her ex husband is not answering my calls which annoys me as you know.” Rosa states as you hit her desk with a simple nod.

“I didn’t believe that Bobby hated her ex husband as much as she said-“

“Always the romantic!” Cuts in Rosa with a snort as she grabs her phone and they start heading out.

“Yeah but not in real life.” You retort with a sigh watching as Boyle reappears in the office, finally without his wings but he is now on a private call with a huge grin on his face…

Standing outside of the coffee shop Jake regrets a lot of things, from being here in the first place to drinking way too much alcohol last night, he had a lot on his mind and somehow it all came back to you his desk buddy.

Having just spoken with Boyle who confirmed you were both in the office, and in a good mood Jake recalled the conversation he had with his best friend at the bar, finally admitting that someone was on his mind a lot but working together with them was a negative obviously.

Cue flashback to Jake dating another cop from a different precinct, him bringing officer Collins to the nine-nine and it being a huge disaster, them working together had been conflicting to the relationship especially seeing how neither of them were on the same page.

“Me and Jake are going to start looking at places soon-“

“But my apartment is so cheap!” Cuts in Jake noticing the look on Boyle’s face as Emily rolls her eyes.

“Yes, but you need a kick in the right direction and I’m just the girl to do it!” Emily states firmly catching the attention of Terry who walks over.

“I get a say in this-“

“Couples should talk things through how long have you two been together?” Terry cuts off Jake.

“Barely three months-“

“Over seven actually.” Emily informs Jake with a glare as he tries to smile an apology, but the look on her face was really something.

“It’s still early days we’re just having fun right?” Jake questions but again it’s the wrong one when Emily literally stamps her foot on the ground.

“I want a relationship not a fuck buddy-“

“Some people are actually trying to work here!” Y/n yells from across the pen, with a pointed look on her face.

“I think we should take this outside.” Jake nods at you and then addresses Emily again who has her mouth set in a thin line.

“Is it worth it? I think we should just break up-“

“What here right now!” Jake interjects with a hint of sarcasm, knowing that he should’ve gone with his detective gut all along.

“Yes, get out-“

“Er, this is my place of work.” Jake snorts turning round to look at you, but you’re hiding behind a thick purple binder.

“Ok, so I will leave then!” Emily shouts angrily.

“What is happening-“

“I’m leaving and you won’t see me ever again Jake, this was supposed to be a good day and I was willing to wait for you to grow up but here we are.” Emily snaps back.

“There is nothing wrong with Jake but it’s obvious you two are mismatched, let me show you out.” Boyle states in an adult voice that makes Jake go still, and Emily nod in agreement as he finally leaves the pen.

“Nothing to see here move along!” Jake calls out when he notices Terry, Gina and even you reappear from behind your binder.

“That was a lot.” Gina begins with a chuckles as she elaborates that “I should know but damn it Jake you don’t meet potential dates at work.”

“Hey, I met one of my ex wives here-“

“See! Do you want to end up like Hitchcock I think I already know the answer to that.” Gina explains with a knowing smile on her face.

“The answer is of course yes!” Laments Hitchcock with a knowing grin.

“I need to get out of here.” Jake groans because it was his day off after all, and now he suddenly had some free time on his hands.

“Have you not gone in there yet?” Boyle questions quickly alerting Jake, who had been locked down in his own thoughts.

“Clearly I’m waiting for you-“

“I can’t believe that we are actually doing this!” Boyle exclaims happily talking over Jake with excitement in his eyes.

“You are doing this Boyle I’m not going in there you just need to get some intel.” States Jake diplomatically.

“This feels like we’re back in high school exchanging letters in class and I’m here for it-“

“Cut it out! Just go in there and get some coffee’s, but one has to have extra caramel syrup don’t forget.” Jake informs Boyle who smiles happily back.

“I can’t wait to see y/n’s face when you give her the coffee, and then finally ask her out for a drink don’t forget!” Boyle claps his hands with obvious glee.

“This isn’t like one of those books you read Boyle this is real life.” Jake reminds him with an eye roll.

“But what’s wrong with some romance? You should totally get her flowers as well!” Boyle cries out whilst Jake wishes that he wasn’t here outside the coffee shop.

“Look just get the coffees and we will go from there.” Jake nods firmly, watching with a smirk as Boyle puts on his black sunglasses as if to not look out of place.

“This is insane.” Jake reminds himself softly because he hadn’t dated anyone since Emily, and to go back on his word and meet someone at work once again…

You stand outside the closed up jewellery store with Rosa cursing by your side, Mrs Rose was supposed to be here a timeline needed to be established again, and her ex husband Keith needed to return their calls for further questioning.

Rosa had put out a call for someone to collect Keith if need be, but standing outside the store was getting boring very quick, you try and start a conversation but your colleague changes the pace.

“Do you know what’s fun? Hooking up with someone because I had one hell of a time last night.” Rosa states with a confident nod of her head.

“Rub it in-“

“I do have a lot of cleaning up to do when I get back home.” Rosa informs you with a grin when she clocks the look on your face.

“Ok enough!” You retort back with an eye roll.

“All I’m saying is if you’re free tonight, why not ask a certain single detective slash idiot out with you?” Rosa questions with a laugh at the pure simplicity of it all because that shit was easy as hell.

“Jake is working late-“

“That’s a stupid excuse.” Rosa sighs but before she can say anything else, a commotion causes them to follow the loud noise, arguing down the side of the short red brick building.

You recognise the suspect Bobby who was wearing a blue baseball cap covering her face, but you registered her voice right away shouting at the man next to her, who was holding a shiny black gun in the air high above his head.

“Drop the weapon!” Rosa shouts which causes them both to look round, whilst the guy attempts to hurriedly yank open the back door.

“Don’t move.” You state back at the same time that Bobby bursts into tears, and the guy next to her snaps and starts running.

He still has the gun in his hand so you set off chasing after him, to the very end of the alleyway where he tries to climb up a fire escape but he can’t reach it, so you pull on his leg to get him down both falling into a large pile of disgusting rubbish bags.

“Get off me bitch!” The guy shouts but you manage to swiftly apply the handcuffs, ignoring his curse words as you read him his rights out loud.

Rosa nods as you eventually walk back up with the guy in custody and a cop car appears moments later, depositing both the guy and Bobby who wasn’t crying anymore but looked super pissed instead, yet none of that mattered right now because it was time to go back to the precinct and book them job done.

“Mrs Rose has just told me that her ex husband is still in the building, another car is coming by in a minute and there are some guys inside right now checking the whole area.” Rosa informs you with a simple nod.

“So you think it was an inside job? Claim on the insurance.” You ask Rosa who again nods in the affirmative.

“We will need to interview them of course, but it appears that Mrs Rose was trying to get help from her ex husband for some insurance money.” Rosa explains because the women had become very chatty, especially when you had run off to catch the other perpetrator.

“Another day-“

“Another set of idiots.” Rosa continues with a scoff but then pulls as face as she asks “Do you smell that?”

“Oh, that’s me I was rolling around in the trash it’s all in a days work.” You retort with a smirk.

“You definitely need a shower-“

“I kinda like it.” You joke back with an eye roll aimed at Rosa, as you watch another man finally exit the shop with two cops either side of him.

“Let’s get back to the precinct, unless you want to go and grab two coffees-“

“No way.” You interject with a shudder as you choose a car to hop into for the quick drive back to the precinct…

Standing at the empty counter Boyle notices the guy called Julius, going by his name badge and wow was this man attractive, the thought makes his heart sink as he thinks of Jake outside.

But then Charles recalls in a short montage that only he can see of Peralta and you, both laughing as you talk together at your desk, Jake watching you reading your book with coffee in hand, then finally eyes meeting from across the pen as if neither of you were far from the others thoughts this guy couldn’t match up to that kind of chemistry…

“What can I get you?” Begins Julius arching an eyebrow at the guy wearing the sunglasses inside as he adds “Specials are on the board and I would highly recommend the macchiato today.”

“Can I just have three latte’s with one that has extra caramel syrup in my good sir.” Boyle replies nonchalantly, but not without turning round to reward Jake with a thumbs up.

Julius of course notices this followed by the badge number pin on this guys tie, he couldn’t be more of a cop which makes him wonder if this was in fact Jake, the object of y/n’s affection one of his best customers on the block.

“Did you say one latte with extra caramel syrup someone has a sweet tooth!” Julius smiles back at the guy in front of him who just nods playfully.

“It’s for a colleague of mine back at the precinct er, I mean the office I’m trying to sweeten them up actually if you must know.” Boyle replies almost giving away where he works but remains cool in his efforts.

“You’re sweet on someone!” Julius grins playing into the playful and sugary theme that had organically started between them.

“I could use some advice really if truth be told.” Boyle nods looking down as the barista starts to operate the large coffee machine next to him.

“I’m all ears, but one moment please.” Julius smirks as he starts to prepare the coffee’s, flicking switch’s and a loud hissing noise that makes the guy in front of him jump.

Boyle is watching this guy working fast as he operates the machine like it was a part of him, lost in his own thoughts until he notices the barista watching him back, an inquisitive smile appearing on his handsome face.

“So, what’s the deal then?” Julius asks the guy who calls himself Charles as he starts to talk at hyper speed.

Jake can see that Boyle is talking at ease with the barista, who looked like he worked in a coffee shop by day, but by night he was behind a bar talking it up over happy hour with women all around him.

Again Jake reminds himself how ridiculous this is because either way, he didn’t have a chance seeing how y/n would let him down some way, or even worse this sexy barista would tell him to back off and that would be that.

Noticing suddenly that Julius had walked round from the counter, to stand closer to Boyle was when Jake had realised that something was about to go wrong, so he reacts by swinging open the green door to finally make his presence known.

But Jake pulls a confused face when he spots Julius nudging Boyle hard on the shoulder, the pair of them laughing heartily at something until they both look up, and he suddenly realises that it’s him he’s the butt of the joke right now.

“What’s happening-“

“Julius is on our side!” Cuts in Boyle with a smile as he elaborates that “The name and number on the cup were just a ruse for you to do something Jake.”

“Oh, so you’re Jake?” Julius questions giving an appreciative glance over at a still confused looking police officer.

“The one and same how do you know about me?” Questions Jake arching an eyebrow at Boyle who grins back.

“Now that would be telling.” Begins Julius with a smile as he heads back round to the coffee machine adding “But I feel you’ve already figured it out seeing that you’re finally getting the coffees for once.”

“This is adorable-“

“Shut up, Boyle.” Jake deadpans in a dark voice heading back outside, holding the door open for an old couple who both nod their thanks.

“He’s almost as stubborn as y/n is!” Julius chuckles which make Boyle nod back in agreement.

“Short of knocking their heads together or better yet locking them in the briefing room, they need to just figure this out for themselves.” Boyle states wisely which causes Julius to roll his eyes over dramatically.

“Why make things so difficult?” Julius questions with a sarcastic tone, watching his next customers who were hugging one another closely.

“Love isn’t as simple as the movies make it out to be.” The woman chimes in with a friendly smile, looking up at the grey haired man next to her who winks happily back.

“But it’s a lot of fun along the way when it happens!” The man reminds his wife with a soft smile one that makes Boyle cluck happily in the background.

“Drinks up!” Julius calls as he places them down on the counter, holding one back as he looks up at Jake who was still outside the door.

“Perfect, let me grab a tray-“

“I can help!” Julius cuts off Boyle as he calls out for another barista, a young woman named Violet who had the same coloured hair as her namesake appearing stage right.

Boyle grins as he leads the way outside with the barista following behind, only when Jake spots him he lifts up his chin glancing away defiantly, pretty much looking like he was sulking right this second.

“Y/n will really appreciate this.” Julius tells Jake with a wink, holding out the drink for him to take which he does, whilst muttering something that sounded like a thank you.

“Then you can finally ask your desk buddy out at last-“

“For the love of god please!” Julius begs cutting off Boyle as he even places his hands together, holding them up in a silent plea in front of them both complete with a wide grin on his face.

“I think that’s a sign Jake.” Boyle jokes with a giggle whilst his best friend nods back with his eyes closed.

“This is all getting out of hand.” Jake sighs aware that too many people were now invested in this, his dating life and of course yours which if he played his cards right could soon become one…

Attempting to drink from one side of your mouth was already getting super old, all this hassle because your bottom lip was currently swollen and split like an overdone hotdog, courtesy of Mrs Rose hitting you with her elbow back in the interrogation room.

It hadn’t been enough that both Bobby and her ex husband Keith, were seated next to one another whilst the third guy was still awaiting his own interview in due time, but angry words shouted between the ex lovers had caused you to get caught in the cross line a direct punch to the face being your reward.

Which was a pretty good estimation of how today had gone, all because you hadn’t visited the Bean Stalk things had all turned to shit, you were thankfully clean now after a cold shower in the changing rooms but there was the whole gnarly lip thing to contend with next.

Having left Terry and Rosa to get answers from the couple that deserved one another, turns out that it wasn’t only a cut and dry fake insurance claim but the shop was also part of a money laundering scheme as well, all within the walls of the deep cellar which was a pretty obvious place to have it you decide to yourself.

But that didn’t matter right now all because it was finally the afternoon, only both Boyle and Jake were not here in the office which made you feel jittery despite the severe lack of coffee, but you were happy of course that the case was practically closed and you were back at your beloved desk.

Mid way through filling out your report which was reminding you where it had all gone wrong, Amy hands you a injury report form which had caused you to giggle at the stupidity, the movement causing your lip to spilt and bleed yet again of course.

Which was why you now had your mouth partly stuffed with a tissue, giving up completely on drinking when all you wanted right now was a sugary coffee, but instead you were staring down at the injury report which was ridiculous yet mandatory.

Suddenly hearing music being played from somewhere you look up to glance at Gina, a usual culprit for hosting impromptu dance parties at her desk, claiming that it either helped her mind or she was readily showcasing some new moves for her latest dance trope.

“Oh that’s a dope song-“

The chorus to a popular Whitney Houston jam was being played out currently, by a Bluetooth speaker that was held aloft by none other than Boyle, who was back to wearing his feathery wings with an extra wide smile plastered across his face.

“I get so emotional baby, every time I think of you!” Sings both Whitney and Gina but only one of them is out of tune right now.

“What is all the commotion, Boyle do I need to write you up?” Holt appears from his office shouting at Charles who instantly drops the speaker onto the floor.

“Er, no it’s all good captain sir!” Boyle shouts seconds after picking up aforementioned speaker, then saluting at Holt who just walks back into his office silently.

“Silent burn, wow there’s no recovering for that my little sugar plum!” Gina states with a loud laugh, wiggling her shoulders as if the music from moments ago was still playing.

“I’m Cupid Gina not a fairy.” Retorts Boyle in a sulky voice.

“I hope that you’re not wearing a diaper right now!” Gina quips back with another loud laugh, one that both Hitchcock and Scully join in with on cue.

“Let’s leave some mystery please, but if you must know I did try and buy some-“

“Boyle, please don’t finish that sentence for us.” Terry begins in a firm voice but it descends into giggles as he adds “ Leave your kinks at the door please officer.”

“Don’t kink shame me!” Boyle retorts loudly but then lowers his head, muttering something to himself as he returns to his desk sitting atop it grumpily.

What a day and you still had the rest of the afternoon to watch unfurl, because there was never a dull moment in this place and time had its own agenda, you think whilst giving the injury form on your desk the stink eye.

Glancing back at Boyle who was still talking to himself as he checked out the speaker, it looked a little dented on one side but he shrugs, then noticing you watching he winks back an overexcited smile appearing in slow motion.

Watching him as he drops the speaker in favour of a white styrofoam cup, which briefly makes you freeze until you realise a lot of places use them, surely Boyle hadn’t gone to Bean Stalk of all places he was a particular type of foodie.

He knew about all the best places in Brooklyn even boasting about them on his blog, the one that you should look at someday but right now wasn’t the time, because you still had this stupid form to fill in and Boyle was really getting on your nerves with his giggling.

White cup still in hand he gets a call through and talks to someone quietly on his desk phone, leaning back against his chair with a smug smile now on his face, making you feel like Boyle was up to something when clearly you were just overthinking everything as per usual.

Cue flashback to grabbing some doughnuts from your favourite place, having bypassed breakfast you had become hangry and in need of some carbs, so with two boxes in your hands you headed to the precinct.

The shop which was aptly named Voodoo doughnuts, had helped you with a case the manager answering questions to an incident that happened across the street, so you were friendly with the staff and besides their food was absolutely delicious.

As soon as you had placed the boxes down on your desk, you’d caught the interest of both Hitchcock and Scully, also Boyle who had taken one look at the purple coloured box and scoffed out loud.

“What’s wrong-“

“Voodoo is so overrated.”Boyle tutted at you as if you should know better.

“If you don’t want any Boyle I will!” Jake nods leaning forward in his desk with a grin on his face.

“Of course Jake.” You nod back happily feeling your face flush, which your desk buddy doesn’t notice but of course Boyle did because he never missed a single thing.

“Oh I get it.” Charles giggles softly as he looks from you to Jake with a smirk.

“Get what? That you’re being weird-“

“No I’m just watching something unfold right now and I have front row seats.” Boyle declares cutting off Jake who rolls his eyes in your direction.

“Ok, then.” You reply awkwardly avoiding Boyle who was batting his eyelashes, in favour of opening one of the purple boxes.

“Can we have one as well?” Scully questions with a smile on his face.

“Sure, they are for anyone besides Boyle who has far too good taste buds for these doughnuts.” You reply with a sarcastic grin.

“His loss.” Hitchcock declares making grabby hands whilst you issue out two doughnuts for the oldest officers on your team.

“Now it’s my turn.” Jake looks up at you from under his thick eyelashes, which clearly does something to your brain when you forget how to speak.

“What’s happening here?” Amy asks with a smirk noticing the look on y/n’s face, accompanied by the smirk on Jake’s which was a pretty cute moment.

“I think they’re about to make out right there on the desk.” Declares Hitchcock with an amused snort, one that breaks the spell between you and Jake almost instantly.

“Don’t be rude-“

“Our first kiss wouldn’t be here.” Jake announces with a scoff but then, attempts to flip it back when he hears what he’d just said out loud.

“This is too cute-“

“Shut up, Boyle!” Both you and Jake retort in unison much to everyone’s delight, the doughnuts forgotten about as you go to one side to the pen and your desk buddy takes the other hiding a goofy smile on his face.

Lost in your own thoughts you suddenly feel super hungry and in need of a beverage, having skipped food for this stupid form and to tend to your broken lip instead, the taste of metal still present on your tongue what you wouldn’t give for some decent coffee right about now…

Spotting y/n at her desk Jake tries to walk slowly over but then gives up, resuming a normal pace as he tries to look nonchalant, despite his heart hammering in his chest and the feeling that this was all a very terrible idea.

What if he had got things wrong or even worse Julius the barista had lied to them, there was no way that you liked him this was a precinct not high school, but this moment in time was pretty reminiscent of another back in his youth.

Only then did he have longer hair and a pizza face, using his humour to hide the fact that he was from a broken home but that didn’t matter right now, because he was way more confident than the teenage version of himself or so he had always assumed.

…this was it!

“For you, madam.” Jake begins with a hint of shyness in his voice, one that he stubs out as he then places the coffee on your desk confidently adding “ I think it’s about time that I bought you a coffee in return.”

Not even looking up at Jake you stare at the tall styrofoam cup instead, the one brandishing the green Bean Stalk logo which makes you then glance up at your desk buddy, who takes a step back when your eyes finally meet.

“You have something on your mouth-“

“Ohhhh no.” You mutter as you hastily take out the tissue, which had spots of dry blood on it as you wish to somehow disappear.

“What happened to your lip?” Jake asks dark eyes full of concern, as he places a hand under your chin to lift your face up heat illuminating your cheeks on cue from his touch.

“Long story-“

“Let’s go talk outside then.” Jake cuts you off as he rolls his eyes and glances beside him, to where Boyle was now standing with a huge grin on his face looking like he was about to explode.

“Off outside together and all alone!” Boyle declares in an excited voice, whilst the rest of the team had at least been trying to act subtle despite watching things unfold in real time.

“Boyle, at ease!” Amy snaps angrily then nods encouragingly at you, as if the camera was rolling and the penultimate scene everyone wanted could finally play out at last.

“I do need some fresh air.” You inform Jake getting up from your seat, grabbing the coffee that your desk buddy had bought just for you, which now made a smile spread across your face.

…which of course makes your lip split open attractively once again the taste of metal stinging your tongue.

Licking your bottom lip you briefly wished that your appearance was better, rather than damp hair and a swollen lip but this was the best it was gonna get, now wasn’t the time to overthink things you did have a coffee in your hand after all.

Noticing Gina give you an over exaggerated wink from across the pen, and then Amy closely follows this with an encouraging nod you finally stand up from your desk, following Jake happily out onto the balcony area for a talk because this was definitely the right moment.

Only then do you notice Boyle with his face pressed against the window, having literally shoved his head through a gap in the blind he was now stuck, but then Rosa appears pulling the officer away with an annoyed look on her face.

“Do you think that the whole team is watching us?” Questions Jake with a low chuckle his brown eyes meeting yours inquisitively.

“Most probably, or Boyle is telling them what we’re saying because he can read lips.” You smirk back flinching at the same time when your own stings in protest.

“So, how bad is the other guy?” Asks Jake motioning to your lip with a concerned look framing his features.

“Got caught in the cross fire between a scorned woman and her ex husband it’s all in a days work.” You reply with a shrug but Jake is still glancing down at you with worry in his eyes.

On cue you explain the case with Rosa and what had happened, even the part where you had caught the guy in the trash bags and arrested him, omitting the part about having to need a shower because of the stray banana peels you’d found inside your jacket somehow.

“Well you look like a badass with your badge of honour, AKA the swollen lip it’s kinda cute on you y/n.” Jake nods with a playful smile aimed in your direction.

“Watch out Peralta it sounds like you’re using a line right there.” You inform him with a roll of your eyes as he arches one of his eyebrows right back.

“Maybe I am or maybe, I’m just telling you that you look cute.” Jake replies with a sidelong look that causes you to choke on your sip of warm drink.

“Thanks for the coffee by the way!” You nod back shyly glancing back at the window, but thankfully there was no one there.

“Well I think it’s about time that I actually owe you a coffee and extend a heartfelt thank you.” Begins Jake with a smile which changes into a laugh as he adds “I just had to go and check out the Bean Stalk for myself.”

“That’s sweet-“

“I met your favourite barista by the way!” Jake interjects with a wry grin as your eyes widen at the same time.

“Oh?” You reply noncommittally ignoring the smile that spread happily across your desk buddy’s face.

“Yeah, he had a hell of a lot to say about you but he was glad that I’d finally showed up for once.” Jake states his brown eyes watching you very carefully as he talks about the digits he had found on his styrofoam cup.

“I didn’t even know that he’d written something did Julius really do that?” You question with both confusion and embarrassment colouring your face a soft pink.

“Yes and it made me so jealous-“ Begins Jake in a low voice clocking the loud gulp you make as he continues by saying “I had to enlist Boyle to help me get you a coffee, and see who my competition was but turns out it was just me battling against myself.”

“At least you got the coffee I hope Julius was easy on you-“

“Oh totally the opposite but it made me see what I was fighting for, and I want to stand in your corner if you will let me.” Jake tells you in a voice that has excited butterflies fluttering in your stomach, unless that was because you hadn’t had any lunch.

“Of course I let you we work together-“

“Sure, but I kind of meant outside of work like us having a date styles.” Jake cuts you off with that playful look pinning you in your place as his words finally sink in.

“You’re asking me out on a date?” You ask Jake who silently nods and you follow suit, both wearing ridiculous smiles on your faces.

“Tomorrow night let’s go for a drink-“

“Hopefully I will be able to use my mouth better by then.” You cut off Jake whose brown eyes crinkle with glee whilst you attempt to backtrack what you’d just said.

“You know what I mean-“

“Detectives, what are you both doing out here?” Questions Holt as he leans against the exit door then motions back to the window where at least five other officers are standing and waving at them.

“Oh captain we were just discussing a case-“

“Actually I was asking officer y/n if she would like to accompany me on a date tomorrow evening.” Jake cuts you off with a quick nod aimed at the Captain who remains poised.

“A bit long overdue Peralta but can you both get back to work after y/n answers your question.” Holt nods back a brief smile appearing on his face, as he turns round to rally the rest of his team.

“So that was awkward but if you don’t want to join me for a drink date or it doesn’t even have to be that it could be any date-“

“I’d love to join you for a date.” You cut him off before Jake spirals a look of relief flooding his handsome face.

Hearing banging on the window the pair of you look to see Boyle and Terry, both of them grinning manically as you slowly take a happy sip from your coffee, feeling Jake watch you sends a shiver down your back.

“I really wanna kiss you but right now isn’t-“

Projected purely by instinct and the knowledge that you were both on the same page, you rise up on tip toes and place a soft kiss on Jake’s cheek which makes him look down, then like the plus side of magnets you both move closer to one another pulled by an electric force of emotions…

“Do I need to have HR on standby?” Terry questions now standing at the door that captain Holt had just vacated, strong arms folded but a cheesy grin on his amused face to show he was just joking.

“Not yet Terry.” Jake explains with a wink aimed in your direction, as you both walk over to the sergeant who finally steps aside to let you inside.

“Wait for it.” You state quietly glancing around the pen which was back in action, what with Boyle on the phone and Gina reading a glossy magazine zero focus aimed at the two detectives.

Not even Hitchcock or Scully who were both eating hotdogs collectively, various condiment stains on both their face and shirts which was a regular occurrence, usually pointed out by Amy who you notice was grinning in your direction.

“I thought we would at least get some acknowledgment.” Jake questions in your right ear making you look away from Santiago, to glance back at Peralta with a firm nod.

The pair of you return to your desks together eyes glued on one another, Jake is the first to look away with a smirk which turns into shock when he spots Boyle, causing you to look around and almost knock your coffee over as a result.

Seeing that Boyle was back to wearing his wings again shaking his butt as he started to dance, then on cue Gina cranks out a Beyoncé song on her phone which truly sets the officer off, arms high above his head as he continues to shake his groove thing.

“Party time!” Scully shouts as he stands from his chair excitedly, throwing his medicated talc powder high in the air, which of course proceeds to cover Hitchcock who starts to choke on the air.

“What is wrong with you?!” Gina shouts switching off the music from her phone.

“Somebody help him!” Scully announces taking the bottle of water from Boyle’s hand as he opens the lid hurriedly.

“Can we please get back to work now everyone?” Holt asks in a tone that suggests everyone gets back to their desk which they do in record time.

“Nothing else to see here move along.” Boyle announces whilst Hitchcock drinks hungrily from the bottle, and Scully hits him on heartily on his back.

“That was some party!” Scully chuckles as he shakes his head with amusement at his best friend’s close call.

“Was that the right amount of acknowledgment you wanted to see?” You ask Jake in your seat across from your desk buddy, the guy of your dreams and possible future all in one package.

“It’s on trend.” Jake nods with a grin aimed right back at you his desk buddy, looking forward to the date and possibility of more.

“You guys are so cute I’m about to cry!” Boyle cries whilst clapping both his hands together, excited and happy as tears fall down his face.

“That’s what I was expecting.” Jake grins whilst pointing at his best bud who is now wiping fresh tears on the back of his hands.

“It’s a great way to end the day.” You reply with a sidelong look at Jake who winks back playfully.

“Just wait until I take you out.” Begins Jake who then hastily adds after hearing what he’d just said “On a date, I meant on a date I’m not gonna try and kill you or anything.”

“Definitely good to know-“

“Oh my god get a room!” Gina yells in obvious disgust as she sashays past their desk her nose scrunched in annoyance.

“That’s definitely gonna become a regular thing now.” Begins Jake with a grin until he hears himself yet again backtracking immediately “I mean the teasing not us getting a room or anything!”

“Of course let’s not jump ahead too quickly Peralta.” You inform him with a laugh right after you clock the look of surprise on his face.

“Keep things slow and steady-“

“Well not that slow.” You cut off Jake leaning back in your chair to take a large gulp of now cold coffee, which you overshoot and instead pour down your chin and patterned blouse.

“Wow, you sure know how to drive a guy crazy y/n.” Jake finishes with a goofy grin as he watches you pull out some tissues from your purse.

“I’ve been told that.” You nod back shyly finally going to make a start on the accident form that you’d been avoiding all afternoon.

What a ride the past two days had been not to mention all the previous months you’d spent pining, only to learn that all it took was to make Jake jealous so he could finally see, what was just across the desk from him.

Looking up you spot Jake staring at you only this time he doesn’t quickly look away, in fact your eyes are locked together and it feels as if nothing else matters, besides being in this new bubble with Jake which sounded like a lot pretty fun place to be…

Cue flashback to three months ago AKA the first week of your relationship, both you and Jake walking into the Bean Stalk coffee shop, after he had spent the night at your apartment you both were left in serious need of some caffeine.

Julius performs a double take the moment he spots them both together, stepping from behind the counter with a wide grin on his face, the pair of you smiling back in response whilst the barista places his hands on his waist.

“So you took my advice then?” Julius questions with a smug smile, as he addresses both of the officers in front of him.

“Definitely not-“

“It kinda helped-“

“See, my work here is finally done!” Julius grins back as Jake and y/n talk over one another.

“You interfered-“

“Sent us in the right direction-“

“You guys are so cute!” Declares Julius with a shake of his head followed by a smile, when he notices Jake winking in your direction.

“We know this.” You begin with an eye roll aimed at the barista who nods back emphatically so you add “ So can we have the usual plus less of your teasing.”

“These coffees are on the house but only if I can wind you up for the foreseeable-“

“That’s my job!” Cuts in Jake with a laugh feeling on top of the world and it had only been one week.

“One Jake is enough.” You deadpan with a nod and a smile at Peralta whose eyes crinkle happily.

“On that note I better start your order-“

“Before that.” Begins Jake with a smirk as he goes on to elaborate by asking “What did y/n say about me was it super embarrassing for her?”

“Hey-“

“A barista never tells but let me just say that she was smitten, all she ever spoke about was her desk buddy who happened to be you.” Julius cuts you off to lament your feelings which wasn’t even a close enough estimation of how you had truly felt.

“Smitten, noice!” Jake states with a goofy grin and even a fist pump in the air with his left hand.

“I am never gonna hear the end of this am I?” You question with an arched eyebrow whilst both Jake and Julius shake their heads in the negative…

Lucky you!

[arielhopepeace]

Hiii. This is my first time posting on here but this is gonna be a Joel Miller and y/n story. I do have a Javier Peña story too, so lmk if you want me to post that!!

Please 18+ and I’ll add the appropriate tags for future uploads but this one is just part one for now! Only fluff (for now).

Part two is here

Part three is here

Part four is here

Part five is here

Part six is here

Part seven is here

Final part is here

6,000+ words

PART ONE

There’s a sense of calm in the stifling Texas air today. All of the kids are off of school for the summer, and people are enjoying the crisp sun rays on their dewy, hot skin. You notice that the excitement for the state fair is palpable, easily picking up on the feeling from the young teens who pass you by on the sidewalk.

It wasn’t too long ago that you yourself were in high school, ecstatic for summer vacation, and a well-earned break from the misery of the education system. School was never for you. It wasn’t that you were inept or lazy, but that the other students were insufferable. It was hell going through school, and it was all because of who your dad is.

Not only is your dad the mayor of Austin, Texas, but he’s also one of the wealthiest people in the state. Your parents always wanted you to go to public school so that you could have a normal education and have a ton of friends, but the second everyone made the connection with your last name, you were doomed.

Luckily, they never forced you to go to college. You were able to secure your spot as your dad’s secretary, and making decent money doing it, too. Truthfully, it frustrates you to be in such close proximity with him all day. It’s not that you don’t love your dad, you do. You just wish you had an actual relationship with him.

The two of you never did normal father-daughter stuff, or even spent much time together growing up. It was always helping him prep for a campaign, or him just talking about his job. It’s always seemed like he cares way more about his job than you, and your relationship suffered because of it.

You’ve never brought this to your dad’s attention, and part of the reason is because you’re scared he won’t even care if he knew. You’re just happy to have a relationship with your mom. She’s like your best friend. And since you didn’t have many growing up, it was nice to be close to her.

As you’re leaving the office to head to your car that is parked a bit out of the way, you notice a few ambulances passing by, the blaring sirens and blinding red lights startling you to the point where you hop back off of the sidewalk. The trucks are nowhere near you, but the sudden burst of noise gave you an unsettling feeling in the pit of your stomach.

You can’t help but watch them as they travel to their destination, praying that they’re not turning towards anybody that you know or love. It alleviates some anxiety as you watch them continue down the long road, knowing that the few people you do care about, live closer than to where they’re going.

You’ve just recently moved out of your parent’s house into your own, and it’s been freeing, yet terrifying. The stillness of the house at night, along with the random creaks and pops that you haven’t familiarized yourself with, leave you so uneasy, that it’s hard to sleep sometimes.

It’s only been a week at this new house, and while it’s beautiful and lovely, it feels painfully empty. You haven’t gotten around to going to a local shelter to adopt a cat or dog, simply due to the fact that you work five days a week from nine to five. An animal deserves to have someone around more often than that, in your opinion, and you don’t want them to go from being at a shelter and alone, to being in your home, alone.

There is a perk to this new house, though, and while you know it’s demented of you, you can’t help but feel giddy every time you see the black pickup truck in the driveway next to yours. Next door to you is your dad’s best friend, Joel Miller, and his daughter, Sarah. It was completely coincidental that this was the house that was the most fit for you, and just so happened to have your childhood crush living next door.

You know it’s wrong of you to have a thing for your dad’s best friend who is at least fifteen years older than you, but you know it’ll never amount to anything. He’s a kind man who loves his daughter more than anything in the world, and the fact that he’s extremely hot is just an added bonus.

He has a luscious head of black hair that is just starting to show a few sprinklings of gray in it. His body is fit, yet still thick and not at all lean. It’s his naturally tanned skin that always gets you, and the fact that it looks like the sun personally kissed him when he was born. Tie that all together with a handsome hooked nose, reminding you of a Greek god statue every time you see him. And that nose rests above an always groomed mustache and beard that has its own dash of subtle gray hairs in them.

If you were older and a different person entirely, you wouldn’t hesitate to go after this man. He’s been single for god knows how long, and you haven’t seen him with a woman since his wife died just after Sarah was born, when you were twelve.

Sarah herself is now twelve, going on thirteen in a few months. It’s strange how long ago being thirteen seems to you, but also how it’s like it was yesterday. In truth, you don’t miss your teen years in the slightest. All the awkward growth, hormones, and the question of sexuality was just plain stressful. But now it’s eleven years later, you’re twenty-four, and you’re living in your own house, with your own car, and pretty content with your life for the most part.

Pulling in to the driveway at home, you see Joel outside washing his truck. White streaks of soap cover the vehicle and your eyes are on Joel’s dampened gray shirt and dark blue jeans that he’s wearing beautifully on his perfect body.

It’s ridiculous how hard-up this man has you. He has no idea the sinful ideas you have in your filthy mind about him, or the fact that he could snap his fingers and you’d do whatever he commanded. You’re practically panting as you watch him stretch over the hood of his truck, the gray fabric of his shirt riding up, allowing you a glimpse at his side.

You shake your head, feeling like a creep just watching him do a completely innocent task. You step out of the car, the smell of soap instantly filling your nose as you walk up to your front door.

Joel takes notice of you and waves, putting his massive sponge down on the hood as he walks over.

You’re instantly nervous, feeling your blood pumping faster in time with his steps toward you.

“Hey,” you say smoothly, not at all sounding as nervous as you feel.

“Hi,” he grins, flashing that goddamn adorable smile that melts you every time. “I actually wanted to ask you about that barbecue your dad is having next week. Your dad said to be there at five, and I know how anal he is about that shit, but I have to bring Sarah to a friend’s house that night. Would he care if I was late? I’ve tried calling, but he hasn’t answered, as usual.”

“Oh,” you scoff, “yeah he never answers. I doubt he’d care, but I could always take Sarah if you wanted me to. I didn’t plan on going to the barbecue anyway.”

His straight black brows push together. “Why?”

Laughing a bit sheepishly, you briefly look down to your feet. “I’m just not feeling it. Those events are never fun for me. I’m always just sitting by myself in the corner while my parents schmooze with the town.” You frown, “And now my only buddy Sarah won’t even be there, so I’m definitely not going. She’s the only one who talks to me, when she goes.”

Joel chuckles, bringing a hand to your shoulder. His touch electrifies you. “Come on, I’ll talk to you. It’ll be weird if the mayor’s daughter isn’t there, right?”

You shrug. “I’d rather stay in bed, eat snacks, and watch a scary movie by myself.”

“Well, hey, if you still end up going after you take Sarah for me, I’ll be happy to see you.”

It warms your heart to hear him say that, and you can’t help the heat that’s made its way to your cheeks. “Thanks.”

“And thank you for taking her. It means a lot.”

“Of course. I love her. She’s the best.”

Joel looks back to his house, smiling fondly. “She is.”

You put your key into the lock, turning it before stepping in. “Just text me next week about what time and where the house is, okay?”

He nods. “Thank you again, y/n. You’re amazing.”

Smiling, you step inside, reluctantly closing the door on the face of the sexiest DILF you’ve had ever had the pleasure of knowing. There’s always that thrill when he’s near you, like you’re in high school again talking to your crush against the lockers while you do your best to be as feminine and alluring as possible.

Your phone buzzes from your purse and you pull it out, smiling when you see a text from Joel.

Joel

5:45pm

Taking Sarah to the fair tonight. Would you like to join us?

You’re not sure why, but your heart skips a beat at him asking you. Obviously it’s not a date, and he’s only asking because you’ll be home alone otherwise. But you know that you’d be an idiot to say no at an opportunity to spend time with him.

5:46pm

Sure. What time?

Joel

5:47pm

Gonna finish up dinner then be on our way. Probably 7.

5:48pm

Okay, I’ll see you there.

Joel

5:49pm

Would you like to just ride with me? You know, save the environment from carbon emissions and whatnot.

You audibly giggle.

5:50pm

Lol, sure. I’ll be ready.

You practically twirl around your living room like you’re the main character in a rom-com. There’s even a slight squeal that passes your eager lips at the scenarios running through your mind. Wouldn’t it be lovely to go on the Farris wheel with Joel; to be so close that your legs are pressed together? Maybe he’ll lean in and kiss you, and fireworks will pop above your heads, adding to the romance of the moment.

There’s nothing you wouldn’t give to have Joel return the feelings you’ve had for him since you were going through puberty, but you know that he’s not interested in someone so young. And the fact that his best friend is your dad would also definitely play a part in his lack of interest. He’s a powerful man, and there’s no doubt he’d be furious if anything were to ever happen.

Shaking your head, you push all of the mushy thoughts away, knowing that all they are are silly fantasies that can never be fulfilled no matter how hard you try to manifest them to reality.

It’s nearing seven o’clock, and you’ve fitted yourself into blue jeans, your black Keds, and a t-shirt with your favorite singer on the front. You obviously want to feel pretty around Joel, so you reapplied the makeup that was already on your face for work, touching it up and making it look cleaner. Your hair hangs loosely, even adding the extra effort to straighten it. You know it’ll frizz up because of the heat, but as long as it’s silky for a little bit, that’s all that matters.

Your stomach growls loudly. Because you were so focused on getting ready to see Joel, you didn’t leave yourself enough time to eat dinner. Of course you could always eat something at the fair, but deciding on what is the biggest issue. There’s always so many delicious choices, and you’re not sure which you’ll land on.

There’s a knock on your front door and you swing it open, seeing Joel in his same jeans as before, but with a different shirt on than the one he was cleaning his truck in. This one is nicer. It’s a red plaid shirt that has the sleeves rolled up above the elbows, and you can’t help but notice the fresh smell of his cologne.

“Hey,” you finally say with a smile. “Let me just grab my purse.”

You stretch behind the door to the coat rack where your tan purse hangs by its long strap. You toss it over your shoulder, turning and locking the front door behind you.

“I’m glad you decided to come with. Sarah is supposed to meet some friends there, so I’d just be the stray dad holding all the tickets and prizes,” Joel smiles down at you.

You can’t help but giggle beneath his intense brown-eyed gaze. “I’m glad you invited me. Would’ve been alone all night.”

He nods. “I know. Figured we could both use the company.”

Joel opens your door for you, and your inner imaginary version of you is doing cartwheels, confirming to herself that this is in fact a date. You brush her off, knowing she’s still over-thinking everything.

“Hi, y/n!” Sarah squeaks excitedly from the back seat. “I’m so glad you came.”

You turn, meeting the soft, wide hazel eyes of Joel’s beautiful daughter. “Me, too! I was telling your dad how bummed I am you won’t be my barbecue buddy next week.”

She giggles, flipping her curly hair behind her shoulder. “I’m sorry! My best friend is having a big sleepover and I didn’t wanna miss it.”

“Aw, no, I don’t want you missing out on that to hang out with me at some lame barbecue! That sounds like a blast.”

“I’m so excited,” she beams. “The first sleepover of the summer.”

Joel gets in with a slight grunt, looking to Sarah in the rear view mirror. “And I know not the last.”

“Nope.”

Joel and I both chuckle, the truck pulling away from my driveway as we head through the crowded streets towards the fair.

To no surprise, the place is jam packed with people of all ages, making it nearly impossible to find a parking spot. Joel manages to find one across the street at a baseball stadium, where a lot of other people are parked for the fair as well.

The three of you walk across the street, waiting for a safe clearing before you head towards the ticket booth at the entrance of the fair. Joel easily pays for the three of you, despite your wallet and cash being ready and in-hand.

“Joel,” you say gently, “you didn’t have to pay for me.”

He smiles, shrugging his shoulders. “Please, it’s not a big deal.”

Sarah looks up to her dad, her lit-up iPhone in her hand as she puts on her best puppy dog eyes. “Can I please go meet Stacy and Lilly now?”

Joel sighs. “Fine, but you keep me updated on your whereabouts, okay?”

She nods fervently. “I promise!”

He gives her a small kiss on the forehead before she’s on her way, scurrying off to be with her friends.

“Guess she doesn’t want me around this year,” he says with a small laugh, but it doesn’t hide the pain in his voice.

“Aw, Joel, don’t say that. Sarah loves you, and you’re an amazing dad. She’s just getting to that age where she’s not a kid anymore. She’ll be thirteen soon, right?”

He looks to you as he nods. “Jesus, yeah.”

“She’s lucky to have you, and she knows it. When I was thirteen, I barely saw my dad.”

His brows fix together with sorrow in his twinkling brown eyes. “Really?”

“Well, yeah. He was so focused on running for mayor and his campaigns,” you sigh. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to darken the mood,” your laugh lightens the air a bit.

“No, not at all. I just had no idea. I thought you two were inseparable, since you work for him and all.”

Your eyes shift to the dirt path in front of you, watching it as you continue to walk along it with Joel beside you. “We haven’t been close in a long time. He’s a bit self-absorbed.”

Joel snorts with laughter. “Well, I could’ve told you that.”

You both chuckle, and you decide to change the subject.

“So, how was your day? I was surprised to see you home so early.”

It’s clear that he gets your signal to switch the conversation, and he does it without a single fret to his words.

“Yeah, I was, too. It was slow today, actually. Normally, I’m not home until after the sun sets, but they didn’t need us as long today.”

“That’s good,” you grin wide. “I’m sure Sarah was happy to see you.”

His eyes soften as he nods. “She was.”

Joel works in construction, and that only adds to the rugged handsomeness that is this man. There’s callouses at the tops of his palms, as well as various small scars and scrapes on his hands and arms. You’re not sure if there’s anything about him that isn’t a complete turn on.

“See? She adores you. It’s okay if she wants to hang out with her friends. Don’t take it personally,” you nudge him gently.

He chuckles, nodding. “You seem to be very knowledgeable for someone who doesn’t have any kids.”

“Only telling you what I personally experienced as a female teen.”

Joel smiles, his eyes turning to look at the different food booths around. “Do you want something to eat? I can’t imagine I gave you enough of a warning to have dinner.”

Your stomach screams in response, pleading for the relief of food. “Oh, it’s not your fault. I was too busy winding down from work to eat. I’d actually love to get something, I’m just so indecisive.”

“Hmm,” he stops in the middle of the wide dirt path, tapping a long, tanned finger to his blackened beard. “Would you like a turkey leg?”

You shake your head as you laugh. “That sounds—messy.”

“So, what? I’m not judging you,” he smiles warmly.

“Maybe something simpler, like a pretzel.”

He gives you a disapproving look, his hands on his hips. “A pretzel for dinner?”

You roll your eyes as you smirk, not being able to help how hot you think it is when he gazes at you in that way. It’s probably your massive-sized daddy issues that have you squirming beneath his line of sight, but you don’t care. You’ll forever find this man to be as sexy as can be.

“Fine,” you quirk up a brow. “How about I’ll have a pretzel and we can share a funnel cake. Deal?”

Joel pats his stomach. “God, with this body? I really shouldn’t.”

“I promise that there’s nothing wrong with your body.” You say it before thinking, and you instantly advert your eyes away from him, continuing over your odd compliment. “Uh—the pretzel stand is over there,” you point, gesturing to it down the path with your head.

You both walk towards the stand, the smell of fresh, soft, buttery pretzels filling your nose and making your mouth practically water. There’s also a cinnamon-sugar pretzel near the window on display that has your stomach rolling over itself in almost agony.

Joel steps up to the window, pushing a five dollar bill towards the older gentleman in the stand. “Two salted pretzels, please.” He holds up his fingers in a peace sign.

The man nods, taking his money as Joel looks down to you with a victorious smirk.

“You’re annoying,” you laugh, shoving him with your elbow. “Why won’t you let me pay for anything?”

“Because I invited you. Just let me treat you and quit complaining about it.”

God. Even his playful assertiveness is sexy. He could do anything at this point and it would leave you weak in the knees. It’s not just what he says, it’s the sultry allure of his deep voice. It’s a soothing, gentle voice, but also powerful and manly. You’ve never heard him yell, but you know that it would knock you off your feet if you did. Just that thought alone tempts you to make him angry, just to experience firm, enraged Joel for your own wicked pleasure.

He hands you your pretzel, clicking his to yours as he bows his head slightly. “Cheers.”

You laugh, biting into the soft, fluffy flesh of the browned bread. The flaky salt hits your tastebuds with a delicious sting, making you salivate as you chew.

“Mmm,” you groan, “thank you, Joel. I’m starving.”

Joel’s eyes meet yours, giving you a small smile as his jaw flexes from his chewing. “You’re welcome. Now, to that funnel cake stand.”

You nod, walking down the path a bit to be instantly drawn in by the smell of decadent, fried batter. Joel bites at his pretzel again, briefly mesmerizing you with his mouth before you look to the funnel cake menu.

“Are you a chocolate or fruit woman?” he asks, pulling his bifold out again.

“Definitely chocolate, but there’s nothing wrong with both. What about you?”

Joel looks to you with a smirk, licking his lips free of salt. “Chocolate. But I was wondering if maybe we did one with chocolate sauce and strawberries on it.”

“God, you’re amazing,” you practically groan. “Yes. That sounds perfect.”

He chuckles as he nods, both of you waiting in line as you finish your pretzels. Joel takes your paper sleeve from you, smushing it with his as he bunches them together, tossing them in the nearest trash can.

You watch as he orders the funnel cake, enjoying how he’s taken charge of the evening. The thought that he might be doing this because he thinks of you like a daughter makes you suddenly feel sick, and you’re praying that he doesn’t. The fact that he said ‘woman’ and not ‘girl’ when asking if you prefer chocolate or fruit was comforting. It made you hope that he saw you as a exactly that; a woman.

His hand slips into his bifold to pull out another five dollar bill, stopping to gaze up at the menu again.

“Sorry, could you actually add a large lemonade to that, too, please?” he hands the guy a ten. “Thanks.”

“I love lemonade,” you smile wide at him, feeling how hot your cheeks have become.

“Me, too. I just know that I need something to drink after that pretzel, and I figured you did, too.”

You both move to the side so other people can order as you wait for your funnel cake to be finished.

“Thank you. You’re so nice to me, Joel.”

He chuckles. “And you’re nice to me. And Sarah, which means more than how you act towards me. You could hate my guts, but as long as you’re nice to my girl, that’s all I care about.”

His girl. God, what you wouldn’t give to be called that by him.

Joel stretches up to grab the funnel cake and lemonade from the woman who hands it to him, and the both of you find the nearest table to sit down at. He hands you a fork once you’re settled down into an old plastic folding chair at a splinter-inducing wooden table.

His fork crunches into the plastic plate as he stabs the dessert, his mouth stretching out in an ‘oops’ expression.

You can’t help but laugh. “It’s okay, these plates are cheap. If stuff gets everywhere, it gets everywhere,” you shrug.

Joel chuckles, pushing a pierced bit of the cake into his mouth. “God,” he chews, “yes, yes, yes.”

You take your own bite, savoring the sweetness of the chocolate, the strawberries, and powdered sugar. They all combine into a beautiful explosion of delectable sugar in your mouth, making you nod in approval.

“This is the best thing I’ve ever eaten,” you say, taking a bit more.

“Oh, I agree.” He gives you a half smile. “And thanks to you, I actually allowed myself to eat it. I never eat stuff like this anymore.”

You ruffle your brows. “Why?”

“Well, I’m about to be forty, and my metabolism isn’t the same as it used to be,” he chuckles. “I’ve already got the dad bod.”

“Dad bods are hot!” you blurt, watching as his eyes widen in surprise, and his eyebrows raise. “I just mean that—like—all dad bods are hot. Having a six pack isn’t the rage like it used to be. It’s dad bods.”

Joel laughs, his head turning down to the funnel cake as he continues to eat. He quickly drops his fork as he chews, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

“Sarah just texted me to tell me she’s going on one of the big rides. She sent me a picture, look.” Joel flips his phone around, and it’s a picture of a wide-eyed, over-exaggerated with fear, looking Sarah and a large ride behind her.

“She’s adorable,” you giggle. “I never rode those things as a kid.”

“Why not?” Joel asks, locking his phone and tucking it into his jeans again.

“I’m a pussy.”

He lets out a loud laugh, contagious enough to have you giggling along with him.

“Why don’t we go on some? We’ve got the bracelets,” he shimmies his wrist at you.

“Oh, god, Joel. I don’t know.”

“Come onnnn,” he drags out. “It’ll be fun. What’s the point of going to the fair if you aren’t gonna ride the rides?”

Rolling your eyes, you sigh, grinning from ear-to-ear. “Fine, but if I throw up, you’re not allowed to judge me.”

His eyes soften as he stands. “I already told you I’d never judge you.”

Joel gestures the rest of the funnel cake to you, but you turn it down, resulting in it being tossed into the trash. You’re both walking quicker than before, your feet carrying you to the ride where you lay against the side and it spins you in a fast circle.

“I will definitely throw up on that one!” you protest, anxiety clawing its way into your chest.

Joel hops in the very short line. “Are you really going to let my money for your bracelet go to waste?”

You glare at him as you cross your arms with a smirk on your lips. “Didn’t think you’d hold it over my head.”

“Well, now I am,” he teases.

The carney signals you guys forward, and you’re both running onto the ride, strapping yourselves against the padded wall directly beside each other. You can feel your heartbeat in your neck, and Joel looks to you as he guffaws.

“If you’re too scared, we can get off, y/n. It’s really okay.”

“No!” you say firmly, finding your courage. “This ride is my bitch.”

Joel cackles with you joining him.

Your hands are gripping the bars near your shoulders as the ride finishes being loaded up. You can hear it being geared up, the slow spin beginning. It’s nerve wracking waiting for it to get to full speed, but it only happens within a matter of seconds.

You’re spinning so quickly you feel like you’re going to fling through the open ceiling of the ride that you don’t dare to look up into. You know that if you turn your head anywhere other than up, you’ll be vomiting funnel cake and pretzel all over everybody in this ride.

The music in the ride is deafening, as are the mechanics and the wind whipping in your ears. Joel screams out beside you, and you decide to scream with him. Slowly, you turn your head, watching through your whipping strands of hair, his own hair being roughly pushed around by the wind.

The ride comes to a stop after what feels like forever, and Joel stumbles out of his space, tumbling to the ground and falling flat on his back.

“Oh, my god!” you cackle, releasing yourself from your seatbelt confines to stumble carefully over to Joel. You see about three different Joel’s from how completely dizzy you are.

“Ah, fuck. I’m too old for this, y/n,” Joel laughs hysterically, his eyes closed.

“Oh, shut up. You’re not old. Now, get up.” You hook your arm under his, slowly pulling him to his feet.

Your arms stay hooked as you both wobble out of the ride, Joel clutching the railings out of the ride for dear life.

“Give me a minute, I still feel like I’m spinning.” His laughter hasn’t stopped since you set foot on that ride.

Your equilibrium has mostly replenished, and you can’t help but laugh at Joel’s lack of steadiness.

He leans back off the railing after a few minutes, brushing his hair down with his palms. “Ah, I’m a mess.”

“You look fine, Joel,” you giggle, fixing your own hair as you wonder how fucked up it looks. “You still want to ride more rides?”

“Maybe just not as spinny,” he chuckles, finally starting to walk towards you. “Something easy.”

“What about the carousel?”

Joel nods. “Perfect. Let me catch my breath a little on those.”

You walk over to the ride filled with shiny, lavish horses all having a pole going through them. There’s only a few people ahead of you, mostly everybody waiting for the bigger, scarier rides.

Joel and you walk the steps, the ride wobbling a bit as everyone gets to their horse. You pick the one that’s your favorite color, and Joel is seated on a sparkly white one beside you.

“Beautiful,” you giggle.

Joel beams wide at you. “I happen to like my glittery horse, thank you very much.”

The funniest part about it all, is how a man so burly and masculine is giggling like a school girl on the back of a wonderfully feminine horse. You’re both laughing your heads off as the ride starts up, going in big, decently slow circles with your horses sliding up and back down easily.

There’s a bit of a jerk in yours, making you move suddenly forward towards the pole. Joel grips your pole, your head hitting the softness of his hand.

You’re amazed at his reflexes, and also his ability to detect you were going to fly forward.

“Wow, thanks, Superman,” you smile with a slight laugh.

“As soon as we started going, I could see that one was a bit wonky. Unlike my pretty glittery queen beneath me.” He uses his other hand to pat the ass of his horse.

Your horse juts forward again, making your forehead knock against Joel’s hand.

“God, I’m moving. This one is gonna kill me,” you say, quickly hopping off to go to the one on the other side of Joel.

His head turns as it follows you, his eyes examining the horse closely. “It seems good, I think.”

“Oh, yeah. This one is a lot smoother.” You quickly pull your phone out, pointing it to the mirror directly beside you. “Smile, Joel!”

Joel closes his eyes as he presents you with a big, toothy grin, and you giggle as you snap your picture in the reflection.

You examine the photo, laughing at the both of you. You turn your phone to show him and Joel belly-laughs.

“You’ve gotta send that to me,” he giggles. “It’ll embarrass the shit out of Sarah.”

Later, you’re both sitting down at the same table where you had your funnel cake, Joel having purchased another lemonade for you two to share. It brings you a slight thrill to know his lips were wrapped around the same plastic straw that you are currently sucking lemonade through.

You’ve had such a good night with him, that the inner imaginary you is actually starting to believe that you may still end up kissing on the Ferris wheel.

Joel pulls out his phone, standing up. “Okay, Sarah said one more ride and then she’s ready to leave. Let’s go win a stuffed animal.”

“Okay,” you beam, carrying the lemonade with.

He lands on a shooting game, and you have to shoot one hundred pellets into a target to break the bullseye out of the paper. If you do it, you get to pick any prize you want and take it home.

Joel holds the stationary rifle steady, leaning down a bit to keep his eye on the sights. The bullets shoot out quickly with a sharp whistling sound as they crash against the paper. Before he’s even finished with his full round of pellets, the middle of the paper falls down, Joel backing up and triumphantly holding his hands in the air.

“I’m the pellet god!” he cries, making you giggle like an idiot.

“Okay, you can pick your prize,” the younger-looking man says to him.

Joel gestures to you, looking to all the prizes.

Your eyes immediately land on the giant purple ape, pointing with a wide grin. The man climbs up and gets it down, the damn thing being as long as you. Joel takes it and hands it to you, your arms enveloping it into a huge hug.

You turn. “Thank you. I’m gonna name him Joel.”

“Oh, yeah? Do I look like an ape?”

You giggle, shaking your head. “Nope. It’s just because I like him so much.”

Joel smiles softly at you, his brown eyes gazing into yours. You feel weak in the knees by the way he’s looking at you, and you know that you’re reading too much into his gaze.

“Daddy!” you hear, the both of you turning to see Sarah. “Did you win me a stuffed animal?”

Joel looks to you, then back to Sarah. “Actually—”

“Yes, he did!” you beam, handing the gorilla to the little girl who can barely carry it. “But he said you have to name him Joel.”

Sarah hugs the stuffed animal tightly, smiling wide as she nods. “Thank you so much.” She puts the animal down briefly to give her dad a huge hug, his arms falling to wrap her up.

Your eyes are a bit bleary as you watch their moment, wishing that your dad would’ve given a damn enough about you to even take you to a fair.

Back at home, you say good night to Sarah as Joel pulls into his driveway. Sarah gives you a hug, then runs inside with her big stuffed animal clung to her side. Joel walks you to your door, peering down at you as you unlock it.

“That was sweet of you to give that to Sarah,” he says sweetly. “Thank you, y/n.”

“Oh, please. I’m sure it means more to her than to me.” Your body faces his. “Thank you for tonight. I had such a good time.”

“I did, too. I’m happy you came with.”

“Me, too.”

It’s quiet for a moment, and all you hear is the chirping of crickets and the buzzing of the cicadas.

“Anyway, good night, Joel.”

“Good night, y/n.”

You walk into your house, closing the door behind you as your back presses against it. Of course you wanted that gorilla, knowing that Joel won it for you, but you wanted Sarah to have it more.

Their relationship is so special and rare. You would kill to have your dad give you more than a passing glance in the last ten plus years. It makes you happy knowing that they will have a good relationship forever, and Joel will make sure of it because he loves her more than anything in the world.

***

[spicyclover]

Cutting through my broken heart

Summary: You and Pierre are living together after his apartment got flooded. He thought he knew you very much until he discovered something horrible.

Hope you’ll enjoy this part. Let me know in the comments section! And to support me by tipping me!

Little information, I will, for now, only post on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

Thank you, and Enjoy! :)

Lots of love, xxx Spicy Clover

WARNING: mention of suicide, mention cuts, blood and blades. Dramatic backstory. 

If you need help, please go TALK to someone, anyone! It’s the first step to getting better, I promised you. I send unconditional LOVE and POSITIVE thoughts to everyone struggling with difficult times. You are NOT alone!

Pierre’s apartment seeped with water, which caused a lot of damage to the ceilings, the ground and the structure of the building. As a result, he was forced to evacuate his home and seek refuge while renovations were being carried out.

Fortunately, his childhood best friend lives only a few steps away from his home, and he was able to move in with her without a problem. Her apartment is much smaller than his, but he doesn’t mind. He doesn’t want to go to a hotel anyway.

The weeks of cohabitation went relatively well. He follows her off-season training, and she continues her art study classes.

Pierre always found her super exciting and passionate. As soon as she talks about art, she gets lost in her universe, which drives him crazy. To see her eyes light up when she speaks of Monet, Salvador's Dalí, Van Gogh or Rembrandt.

Or when she forces him to come with him to exhibitions. He loves museums but to the point of spending all his Sunday afternoons doing that... Yet, for her, he does.

It’s crazy that when he thinks about it. He never notices her distress.

He never noticed that she never wore a short-sleeved shirt, always long sleeves. He never noticed how little her appetite was. He never saw the nasty look of her classmates whenever he came to pick her up. 

The handkerchiefs of blood are in the bathroom bin. The razor blade was placed prominently in the pharmacy box, the many stained sweaters. Tears and especially suffering in her eyes.

She can’t remember when she started... it was in the early years of college. The long hours of work, the hatred of her comrades, and the quarrel with her parents, she no longer what triggered this vicious circle.

If found her one day, barely alive, on the bathroom floor. The blood flowed from her handles in abundance, and, as always, she waited for the pain to pass. Only that day, the pain was too present and painful to replace.

He called her name, but she was barely conscious. He took her in his arms, screaming for help. It was the next-door neighbour who called the fire department after she stormed into the bathroom. Peter’s cheeks were filled with tears, and he could not do anything else.

“Why, Stella, why?” He whispers in her ear, kissing her temple. 

“It’s... it’s... it’s okay,” she responds, barely aware. 

“Don’t leave me...” Those were the last word she heard from him before being taken by the ambulance. 

Several months passed, and Stella always refused Pierre to come and visit her and she did not want to see his gaze lost in misunderstanding and love. Despite all her love for him, Pierre has never been a consistent person in her life. Always part of the four corners of the world, he doesn’t have time to constantly check-in.

During the long months of her convalescence, she spent them with her parents in the south of France. Far from Milan, far from her comrades and especially far from him. She will never confess to him, but that evening, she was in this state partly because of him. An umpteenth rumour and an umpteenth photo of Pierre in the arms of a pretty girl were overcome by her fragile mental health.

“Falling for him wasn’t falling at all. It was walking into a house and suddenly knowing you’re home.” She adds to her speech.

The psychologist nods his head, writing carefully in his notebook. 

This is undoubtedly the eleventh session they spend on Pierre, and this is the first time she allows herself to speak of him as someone she loves. A true love.

“Could you think of seeing him again?” Ask the doctor carefully.

“I wish I could explain to him how he makes me feel, and I guess the closest I can get to it would be to say that; he makes me feel good while, at the same time, breaking my heart.” 

After that session, she thought long and hard about picking up her phone and dialling his number, but she felt like she was taking several steps back if she made that decision. So she didn’t. She never called him or answered the thousands of messages he left her.

Pierre spent the last few months trying to find out where Stella was, but no one in her family answered him, leaving him in a cloud of gray. He returned several to the apartment, hoping to see her sitting in front of her painting. Yet every time he walked through that door. It was the cold and the silence that they welcomed him as an old friend.

He finally tidied up his things and went back to pursue his dream, bringing with him a little piece of her. An old sweater, too oversized, from Milan college that still smells like her. She wore it all the time when they were living together, and it was her favourite. 

He once asks her about it, and she only responds, “Every time I wear it, I think of you. For me, Pierre, you are Milan.”

He didn’t respond anything, just looked at her watching some fireworks. That’s when he knew he loved her. 

It’s a May afternoon, and she decided to take a few days off from the family home to watch the boats on the port of Monaco. Hundreds of Yachts turn between them and around the dock while waiting to return, a truly magnificent spectacle. The city is preparing to receive the Grand Prix next week, so hundreds of people are already present. She didn’t think about this event coming here, which made her sad.

Thought of the Grand Prize comes to the thought of Pierre, yet no negative thought tarnishes her day. It was only when walking back to the car that her heart stopped.

There he is, a few meters from her, next to his car, talking with his friends.

Her heart stops, and her head goes crazy. Unable to move, it is only when Pierre looks at her that she finds the use of her legs. She flees through the harbour to find a place to hide forever.

Pierre’s heart is racing, and he does not hesitate a single blow before running after her. She is there in the flesh. Skin more radiant than ever, hair more voluminous than ever, and especially a beautiful strapless dress.

They run around, passing tourists and locals, him shouting her name.

He eventually caught her at the end of a pontoon. Unable to escape further, she was trapped.

“You’re not gonna jump, are you?” He asks in a humorous tone before he safely advances to her.

“Am thinking about it.”

“I’ve missed you.”

“No...”

“Yes, every day since that day, I think of you. I dream of you.”

“Stop...”

“Je t’aime, Stella.” He says while stroking her cheeks. “Every day... I’ve tried so hard to come to see you, but they never let me in.”

“I know... I ask them to.” 

“What? Why?” He asks, confused. 

“Meeting you, Pierre, was like listening to a song for the first time and knowing it would be my favourite.” Says Stella taking a deep breath. “Since the day we met at this primary school, I loved you. You are my first love, Pierre. And I can’t bear that I’ll never be the one for you. You have so many pretty girls around you every time, and I’ll never be like them. I’ll never be popular. I’ll never be prettier or funnier than hers. And I can’t go back to where I was. I need to move on, Pierre. I need to...”

“Stella! Stella! Stella,” he shouts, taking her chin up.

“What?”

“You have a place in my heart no one else ever could have, but we can be together until you are better. You need to be strong and brave. I can’t be the one helping you ‘cause I'll lose the sense of everything. You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars, Stella.” Tears in his eyes while looking at her tears.

“No, we can’t be together. No now. No, never.”

“I...”

“Je t’aime Pierre, mais j’ai trop travaillé pour que tu me brises le coeur une nouvelle fois. Je ne peux pas le prendre. J’ai besoin de quelqu’un de présent et d’attentif, de patient et de fidèle...” She adds taking his hands off. “We are endgame. Goodbye Pierre, maybe in another life.”

“Stell...” 

This time he didn’t go after her. He watched her walk away. Tears always run down her cheeks, but he knows he can’t do that to her, not after what she’s been through. He has to let her go even if his heart is broken, even if she took a piece of his heart with him. 

‘Only knew he loved her when he let her go.

And he let her go.’ Let her go, Passenger.

[miscelunaaa]

masterlist | miscelunaaa

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k e y

[s] smut

[f] fluff

[a] angst

[c] crack/chaos

[wip] work in progress

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member x member, posting only on ao3. Namjoon has to learn how to drive. Yoongi’s teaching the driver’s ed class he enrolls in. Namjoon may or may not have asked him out when they were in high school. Yoongi may or may not have rejected him. What the hell are they supposed to do now? Pretend they don’t know each other? modern au. aged-up hyungline, high school-aged maknae line. chaos. 

∞ flat sprite and saltine crackers [ f, oneshot ] 2.1k

Being a parent on a normal day is a challenge. When you add a sudden stomach bug to the mix, you and your husband have to play in master mode. parenthood au. personal favorite.

∞ in the midst of the earth [ a, oneshot ] 5.7k

After your grandfather is hospitalized following a massive stroke, Namjoon watches you pick up the pieces and try to hold them together all by yourself. a meditation on grief and suffering. 

∞ sacrificial [ a, s, series ] 74k 

complete! posted only on ao3. There's a beast out in the woods and your village decides to offer you up as a virgin sacrifice to make him go away. Good thing the beast is actually kind of a nice guy, if not a little awkward because he's spent so much time alone. Maybe this is for the better; you never really liked the other villagers anyway. strangers to lovers. historical fantasy au. slow burn. often referred to as lorge namjoon fic or white whale no.2 in passing. 

∞ shell-ter [ c, s, oneshot ] 7k

part of the series animals in predicaments. While walking on the beach and avoiding your responsibilities, you stumble upon a line of hermit crabs waiting to exchange shells. It should be an exciting moment for you, but instead there’s this random naked guy yelling at you to leave his friends alone. Why can’t a stroll on the beach ever just be a stroll on the beach? strangers to lovers ft. hermit crab hybrid!namjoon and a soft-bodied reader. personal favorite.

∞ the sins of other hearts [ a, s, short series ] 12.8k

complete! posted only on ao3. Months have passed since your father died, leaving you to care for your little household and its dwindling resources. In a final bid for security for your family, you decide to make your way to the palace for the bride parade that the king has called for his son. What awaits you when you get there will be a test of your fortitude in ways you can’t even begin to imagine. a fairy tale retelling ft. a cursed namjoon, ambiguously placed historical setting, and an accidentally soft-bodied reader.

∞ things left unsaid [ a, s, oneshot ] 1.4k

After hearing of a near miss you had while riding on the trails, Namjoon returns home to see you’ve escaped mostly unscathed. Your hearts are another matter. strained established relationship. historical au.

∞ also featured in: spin cycle

 s e o k j i n

∞ feathers [ f, drabble ] 1k

It’s time to say goodbye to one of your favorite parts of your partner. established relationship au ft. a soft bodied-reader.

∞ flurious [ drabble ] 3k

it's fine, you're not mad at your best friend at all! in fact!! you're so fine that you're going to work off some steam just to prove how fine you are!! meet cute. college au. based on real events. 

∞ love, lust, and life mushrooms [ s, c, oneshot ] 7k

Jin has had a very specific fantasy for a long time, and he’s decided that he wants to make it a reality. Will your relationship be strong enough for the strain this puts on it? Or will the two of you come out of it stronger than ever? established relationship au.

∞ strawberry whine [ f, drabble ] 1.1k

You can’t stand strawberries, but your fiancé has taken you to his uncle’s strawberry farm to see if he can change your mind. ft. the life mushroom couple.

∞ also featured in: give yourself a try and shell-ter

y o o n g i

∞ desperate [ c, s, f, drabble ] .9k

member x member, posted only on ao3. Jungkook is very done with Yoongi’s shit and takes matters into his own hands. Brought to you by Calvin Klein. Written for a dear, enabling friend. 

∞ driving me @&#%! [ c, a, f, wip, drabble series ] 3k+

member x member, posting only on ao3. Namjoon has to learn how to drive. Yoongi’s teaching the driver’s ed class he enrolls in. Namjoon may or may not have asked him out when they were in high school. Yoongi may or may not have rejected him. What the hell are they supposed to do now? Pretend they don’t know each other? modern au. aged-up hyungline, high school-aged maknae line. chaos.

∞ give yourself a try [ a, s, twoshot ] 24.6k

complete! You’ve got an enormous crush on Yoongi, the machine tech, and, if Jimin is to be believed, the feeling is mutual. A broken espresso machine and a snow storm are all it takes to bring everything crashing down around you. released as a two shot ft. a plus-sized reader. personal favorite.

∞ sodium vapor [ a, oneshot ] 2.1k

Yoongi doesn’t have much going for him, but you don’t need much to grow attached. It’s a pity, then, that you loose each other as quickly as you were found. missed connection. personal favorite.

∞ troparion for a summer’s evening [ a, drabble ] .5k

You wake to find yourself alone in bed when there should be someone next to you. features no use of gendered pronouns. personal favorite. 

h o s e o k

∞ domesticated fluff [ f, a, oneshot ] 1.7k

He’s the person you’ve always wanted. He’s your sunshine. You just want him to be happy. After an admittedly rough start, will you be able to bring Hoseok all of the joy he brings you? non-romantic adopted dog au.

∞ quiet time [ f, drabble ] 0.45k

You haven’t had a quiet morning alone to read in a long while, and that’s why it seems suspicious. a dad!tan drabble using no gendered pronouns. 

∞ whispers in the dark [ a, f, oneshot ] 1.4k

Hoseok just doesn’t have it in him to make you even more miserable right now, so he tries something a little different. sleep paralysis demon hobi ft. a gender neutral reader. personal favorite. 

j i m i n

∞ untitled wind sprite jimin fic [ a, s, wip ] likely 10k+

outlined. currently avoiding alskjfdhgfjhgf. this one’s going to fucking hurt; as such I've been avoiding it even though this might be one of my favorite story ideas ever. I'm very serious about writing this at some point but i just have to get in a particular headspace for it. it deserves the utmost care. probable warnings include fae trickery, second chances, and a near death experience. little mermaid au if you squint. may end up being a minion fic instead of reader insert. *shrug*

∞ also featured in: give yourself a try

t a e h y u n g

∞ engorged [ f, c, drabble ] 0.83k

You and Taehyung get along better than you could have ever imagined, but all bets are off when you have a disagreement about a “friend” who makes a surprise visit. On his face. established relationship au.

∞ no shade in the shadow of the cross [ a, oneshot ] 5.8k

After his life in the city falls apart, Taehyung moves into his late grandmother’s home so he can heal and forget. When a little boy appears on his back doorstep, everything changes. supernatural/fantasy horror. heavy angst. read the warnings. personal favorite.

∞ also featured in: cuffing szn

j u n g k o o k 

∞ desperate [ c, s, f, drabble ] .9k

member x member, posted only on ao3. Jungkook is very done with Yoongi’s shit and takes matters into his own hands. Brought to you by Calvin Klein. Written for a dear, enabling friend.

∞ spin cycle [ f, s, drabble series ] 12.5k

complete! This random guy has started doing laundry at your favorite laundromat each week (at the same time as you, no less!) and to be honest, it’s going to be a problem. You’re just not sure how yet. strangers to lovers. idiots to lovers. really slow burn. 

∞ three minutes [ f, drabble ] 0.9k

You can’t stand the thought of Jungkook feeling alone while he’s sick, so you take matters into your own hands. non-romantic/platonic drabble ft. a gender neutral reader. personal favorite.

∞ also featured in: give yourself a try and cuffing szn

m i s c ; 

∞ the deluge, a fic depicting an unnamed bts member x reader. personal fave. 

∞ my favorite reads for the year, 2022

∞ kinktober 2022 over on AO3, October 2022

∞ Ask My Muse Masterlist, March 2022

∞ Fic Title Prompt Game, April 2022

∞ “soft-bodied” reader-insert characters and inclusivity, an essay

∞ misc asks mlist

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©miscelunaaa 2021-2023. My work is only found on this blog and under my ao3 pseud. Do not, under any circumstances, copy or repost my work. Thank you.

last updated: 11.10.2023

[atlas-of-a-human-soul]

Your riven imagine was amazing! Could write about the reactions of the winx and people in school, with a light fairy from earth being with him, please? Anyways, hope you're ok :)

Come back to me (part 1)

Pairing: Riven x reader

=================================

Ever since Rosalind officially took over Alfea, Y/N had felt her hope dwindling. She’s a light fairy, she thrives surrounded by good. The darkness surrounding her is exhausting, bleeding her dry of all positive emotions.

Belief is when there is no reason to hope, when despair sets in, and yet you hold fast to a certainty that it is worth seeking the light, even if you have never seen it.

“I’m not an asshole without a cause. Trust in me.”

Riven is what Y/N believes in. Despite her better judgement, she can’t help it - she does trust in him. Even though he’s gone down a darker path than she could have imagined.

Seeing Riven as Rosalind’s private guard had been tearing her apart, more so when she saw him locking lips with Beatrix.

‘We’re just friends’, she told herself in order to not hate him for his choices. She told herself all of this is for a reason. 

“Ugh, why are you staring at those two freaks”, Stella makes a fake gagging sound, drawing attention of Riven.

He glances at Stella, but his eyes are drawn to Y/N. Swallowing thickly, Riven felt his heart sink at the hurt flickering in her eyes. Exhaling through his nose, he locked eyes with Stella again, unable to bear the heaviness of Y/N’s gaze.

“What are you looking at?” Stella narrows her eyes, making Riven roll his eyes.

“I was about to ask you the same. You do know that beauty isn’t transmittable, right? Staring won’t help fix your face.”

Beatrix snickers at Riven’s snarky remark, enjoying the way Stella’s nostrils flare in rage she’s trying to contain. Y/N shakes her head, disappointed by his behavior.

Is there really any of the old Riven left inside that empty shell of his? He barely looks like the Riven she knew let alone anything else. 

“Really, Y/N? This is who you swore is the kindest guy you’ve ever known?” Bloom buts in, glaring at Riven.

“I can introduce you to someone so much better”, Aisha adds only making Y/N’s heart ache. 

She doesn’t want anyone else. She wants Riven. She wants the guy who’d hold her hand and tell her everything would be alright. She wants the guy who’d written her love notes and called her Sunshine. She wants the guy who made her smile with a single look, but that’s no longer possible. She sees that now.

Blinking fast, her teeth sink into the soft flesh of her bottom lip before she turns around, rushing off to find a moment alone. She needs a place where she can heave, let out the panic of her realization pass through before she loses control and blinds half the school. 

She can feel her heartbeat in her throat as tears rush to her eyes. She was his Sunshine, a ray of light capable of shining through the darkness. She doesn’t feel very light and bright anymore. She feels empty and she feels angry and hopeless and bitter about losing him.

After the storms the sunshine returns, and crying is much the same, so she lets it out, she lets it go. She must.

“Sunshine?” A breathless voice freezes her in place with her hand on her chest.

Looking over her shoulder, she finds the perpetrator of her deepest pain.

“There was hope before. Just a tiny flicker.” Wiping her tears with the back of her hand, she sniffles. “Who are you now?” 

“I’m still me. I’m still your Riv.” He steps closer but Y/N recoils.

“You’re not the Riv I know. And you’re certainly not mine.” She can still see his hands all over Beatrix and the flashback makes her sick to her stomach. 

“I’ve always been yours, Sunshine.” Riven’s voice breaks and Y/N holds her breath with the sound cracking her sanity.

“How is it you see the suffering and choose to make it all the worse?” Sitting down, she covers her quivering lips.

“I’m not trying to make it worse, I swear”, Riven falls to his knees before her, reluctant to touch her. If he saw her recoil from his touch once again, it would kill him. They were never more than friends, but they were more together than couples who actually dated.

“Trust me”, Riven pleads, his fingers shaking as they make contact with her knees. He lets out a relieved sigh once she allows his hands to rest there.

“Trust goes both ways, Riv”, Y/N looks down to his hands, aching to take them in hers yet she can’t. She’s been itching to hold his hands for a long time now, but that would only give way for more heartbreak.

“I’m the inside man”, Riv admits and Y/N’s eyes widen. “I’m trying to find a way to take them down and get Silva out of prison. Sky knows this. Only Sky.” Shaking his head, Riv sighs, “And now you. No one else can be included, Sunshine.”

“Why didn’t you tell me from the start?” She leans in, her breath tickling his lips as their foreheads meet and they close their eyes. The intensity of the moment set them aflame for they’ve never allowed each other the luxury of such intimate touches. Not in a sexual manner, although Riven wanted her in every way, but in a way where the sound of her voice was enough to make his heart flutter. And he never had his heart flutter.

“I told you to trust me.” Riv defends, making her smile.

“You’re an asshole”, she whispers. She can’t help but wonder if he’ll kiss her, finally. The anticipation is mirrored in her shaky lips and she knows she’s so unprepared, but she longs for him. 

“I’m your asshole”, Riven’s nose brushes hers and her heart skips at the notion.

Riven’s hand found the back of her neck, quickly pulling her closer until their lips touched and the words ceased. The kiss barely lasted, managing to take their breaths away in an instant. Y/N surrendered to his touch, losing her senses as his lips brought her heartbeat to the speed of light. Her lips tingled, electricity sparking up throughout her body and her hands clutched to his shirt with all their might as if he could slip through her fingers like sand. He’d been wondering how her rosy lips would taste, never quite sure if it would make any impact on him but from the way his hands tremble with her face in them tucked away safely, he knew he has been bested.

“I wish I didn’t have to leave”, he whispers against her lips before pecking them again, drunk on adrenaline her lips caused.

“Don’t leave then”, she cups his face, holding him close. The simple thought of letting him go pains her. “When you’re gone, I’m stuck in darkness.”

Drawing a deep breath, Riven inches away. Using his hands, he brings her hands down from his face, clinging to the softness of her palms for a moment longer. “Even when I’m with you, I’m darkness that’s consuming you. Sunshine, no matter what happens, I’ll always be bad for you.”

Scoffing, she narrows her eyes ever so slightly, “That should be my choice and I choose you.”

“If you cling to me, I’ll snuff out your light. It’s who I am. I’m the darkness to your light, the night to your day. These kinds of loves don’t have happy endings.” Pressing a kiss to her palm, Riven leaves Y/N in deep thought.

Is it true? Is he her darkness? How much light had he taken already? Because even with that in mind, she wished to be consumed by him entirely. 

People say the darkness presses in, but that’s not true. The darkness kisses up to your skin closer than a lover’s lips and whispers excitement into your ears. The darkness becomes your best friend, a second skin that’s flattering and cool. The darkness becomes your favorite thing right up until your exits are blocked, then it has no reason to hide.

If it was easy to spot darkness there wouldn’t be a problem, now would it?

How often do you confuse day and night?

“Riven is my darkness”, she realizes and yet she doesn’t care. She’s light enough for both of them. If he is her darkness, she is his light and while the sun and the moon failed to make it work, Y/N decided to prove everyone wrong, Riven included.

PART 3 

[dreamrecorder]

Three - Family in the Inn

Zhongli witnesses the love Xiao deserves.

Two

A bit heavy at the end- i teared up at some point ksks ill add the cut thingy when get my laptop

Starting from the earliest memory your mind can remember, you've already heard stories of the god that ruled over your home land. From your mother, your father, from the merchants and adventurers resting within the inn. You often heard how the Geo Archon would always fly above the lands, overseeing the safety of Liyue- in the form of a great and majestic serpentine dragon. To protect the land, the Archon will not hesitate to strike down his foes with his spears made of stone! Spears that were huge as mountains and can shake the very core of the earth! A fierce god he is, but to his people, the Archon is just and kind. For he has guided Liyue for a thousand years even before Liyue was founded.

Those stories always left you in awe, your mind conjuring up imaginations of a mighty dragon soaring up high in the sky!

~

"Bai, I can't sleep…" You whined loudly to your black cat with gold eyes and a white diamond spot on its forehead. But alas, the cat can't understand you, simply giving you a somewhat dismissive meow. You puted at its direction. It was always like this if your brother wasn't able to tuck you to bed. Without his voice lulling you to sleep, right now you're vibrating energy.

"I wanna play…" You mumbled but then an idea popped up. With some effort, you hopped off your bed and went to the door. A bit of a struggle because of your height, but you manage to reach the doorknob and get out of your bedroom to the lobby. Bai was following close by.

With quiet footsteps, you went to the balcony and called in a whisper of excited glee-

"Thousand Winds?"

Just by those two words alone, the breeze picked up and your ears were then filled by the joyful voices of the wind. To emphasize that happiness, you were carefully lifted up from the ground and twirled you a bit, leaving you in a fit of giggles.

When the wind calmed down, they asked, The Little Wind calls! What is it do you want little kin?

"I wanna play!"

And play they did without a care for the world. Usually these wind spirits were careful when their brother Demon Wind is around- but with him gone for now, these spirits have different ideas. Little Wind do you want to fly like us?

You didn't even miss a second to say yes. After all, you've always dreamed of flying! Just like the stories you heard about your Archon flying up high in the sky!

!!!

"If I can fly, I might get to see Rex Lapis! Please please pleaaaase Thousand Winds, I wanna fly!"

The wind spirits cheered in delight, their whispers growing louder by the second. The breeze grew stronger and stronger around you and soon enough you were lifted off the ground as anemogranas surrounded you. You'll get to fly! How exciting!

At that age, you were unaware of the dangers that lie ahead- all too buried in that naivety and innocence that children possess. 

Rather than flying- it was more like gliding. Of course the wind spirits had some sense not to put you in harm's way! Flying requires some force to make you go higher- as for gliding, a gentle breeze simply does the trick.

It was a slow descent and you were amazed all throughout! You could see the entire Dihua Marsh along the ruins that littered around! You were amazed how the stars and the moon seemed brighter and closer now that you're up in the sky! The feeling of the rushing wind on your skin! It was cold but you didn't care! 

Every now and then, the spirits would suddenly nudge you up higher, rewarding them with your joyous scream and laughter. 

You landed softly at the concrete ground, near a statue. Curious, you noted that the statue was of a man sitting on a throne. This was the first time you've seen this statue but you could feel something from it. Geo? And the statue's hooded eyes, you felt like you were being watched through them.

This, Little Wind, is the statue of the Geo Archon.

The wind whispered with respect but you- you were puzzled.

"I thought the Geo Archon is a dragon? Can he turn into a human, like me?"

You could hear the wind laugh gently, the breeze ruffling your hair. Suddenly, the wind sounded older, wiser. A story for another time, little one. It's about time you went back home.

Again you whined, but the spirits promised you flight and that's all what you needed to be convinced. The spirits and the anemogranas alike were about to lift you- but a voice stopped your tracks.

"Yo kid! You seem lost!" The voice was heavy and gruff.

You turned around to the voice's direction and you were greeted by a burly man who wore a staw hat and some kind of black cloth wrapped around his neck.

"I'm not lost, sir." You replied politely, slowly taking a step back. You noticed how the air stilled. Tense. But of course, the man is not convinced. Seeing how he kept walking to you, you were starting to become scared, but you remembered the words from your brother, Always keep calm-

"Are ya sure, kid? We're kinda in the middle of nowhere. No houses and all that. How 'bout I help you get home?" The man offered cheerily. The forced kind with another sure step towards you. But that was what doomed him, the winds were quick to blow him away and you were surprised!

It wasn't a big distance, and the man was quick to recover. Instead of a cheery smile on his face, it was of anger and that was when you became really scared. "You!" He barked as he walked to you again with equally angry steps. "You're coming with me brat!"

If you find yourself in danger- don't hesitate to call my na-

"That's enough." A man's voice spoke- clear and commanding. The man stood next to you as he landed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. It was brief moment, but he also made sure to give you a quick gentle smile your way. You… you trusted this man with amber eyes.

"Who the hell are you?! I've got no business with you!"

"And you also have no business with this child for I am her guardian." The man replied smoothly as he simply stood his ground with you, despite the other now seemingly ready for a fight. Feeling the anger, you tightly clung onto the newcomer's coat and hid behind him. On his back, you were met by a Geo Vision.

"Like I'd believe you! Just swooping in and play hero huh rich guy!"

The Geo user sighed, and the next thing you knew, the man summoned a spear out of thin air! "I have no intentions of fighting you. But I promise you- You will suffer the wrath of the rock should you choose to continue this behavior."

His voice was light, but you noticed the silent message under his tone. The would-be kidnapper shivered at the amber gaze and decided, that it was wise to back off- Not without leaving a few curses that is. 

"He's gone now." The man spoke gently as hebturned around to look at you. Oh how his heart softened, seeing your frightened look and teary eyes.

"You're safe, I promise you. My name is Zhongli." 

Zhongli? You heard this name somehwere, but you couldn't pin point where or when… still a bit shaken up from whay happened. Remember, Little Wind. Zhongli was mentioned in passing a few times by your brother. Perhaps this is the very same Zhongli your brother speak of…

"Umm…" Your voice squeaked, "Do you.. do you know my brother?"

At that question, Zhongli confirmed that you are the rumored little sibling of Xiao. It would have been delightful to meet you on different circumstances, but he was glad nonetheless to save you from the previous situation.

"May I know the name of your brother, little miss/sir?"

"His name is Xiao." You replied and Zhongli noticed a bit of happiness in your voice.

"I do know you brother, quite the stern one, too. And he will be stern with you if he learns what happened here and you going out during the night. Does he know that you're out right now?"

With that question, you finally realized the gravity of the situation. You left during the dead of the night- without permission whatsoever! Oh no, I'm in big trouble… What if you made them worry? You were so far away from home! All these thoughts made you start tearing up again and Zhongli was quick to notice. He was about to speak up and console the little one when a gush of air stopped him. And that very same gush of air made you tear up some more and clutched on Zhongli's coat.

"Name, where have you been?" Xiao's voice was calm- but he's not the perfect brother nor human. There was something in his tone that suggested he was clearly not pleased about the situation. You could feel his gaze boring onto your back.

With a bit of coaxing from Zhongli, you faced you brother. "I-I'm s-sorry, gēgē…" Your voice cracked as tears started to blur your eyes. But your brother was not yet done.

"Name, do you have any idea how worried our mother was when she found out you were out of bed and could not find you anywhere in the inn?"

The thought of your mother searching all over you made you tears form more. "I- I do."

"Do you really?" 

It was a sharp question without even missing a bit, and that was the starting point for you and for him. Even Xiao winced at his own words, he swore he'll have to make it up to you later- but for now you had to understand. He remembered the panicked face your mother wore with tears threatening to fall. He remembered her panicked voice when she called for him. He remembered the worry he felt and the dip in his stomach when she said you were missing.

"I-I'm so sorry, gēgē. I-I was just p-playing. I d-didn't want you and mama t-to worry…" You couldn't meet his eyes.

Worry?

"Just. Playing? Name, you left home in the middle of the night- when dangers are high- just to play! Name, you could have gotten hurt! We were not just worried, Name- we were scared that something might have happened to you!" 

Every word he spoke- his voice rose higher- not being able to contain the pits of his negative thoughts. Every word- it was like a stab to his heart. But he had to be firm.

"I will ask you again, Name. Do you really understand what you did and their consequences?"

And thay was the breaking point and the night was filled by you whimpers, your wales, and your aplogies. Your shoulders began to shake and tears flowed freely and lungs struggling for breath. "I-I'm sorry, gēgē- I-I shouldn't h-have left h-home! Pleas-se d-dont stay m-mad at me… I p-promise i-it-t won't happen aga-ain- I-I'm s-sorry p-please don't h-hat-te m-me.

You kept going with your rambles and your tears. And for every whimper you released, Xiao was close to breaking too. The brother lost count many times you've repeated your mantras- but he decided- I can't do this anymore. Not with you crying breathless. He'll talk to you about this when everything's calm- his emotions and yours.

With swift steps and sure movements, Xiao pulled you into a hug and your cries grew louder. "Just don't do that ever again, okay.." He said gently but voice cracking, leaving a kiss on your forehead as you nodded readily. Once your cries have calmed down, Xiao carried you to his arms followed hy him wiping away your tears.

"Name."

"Y-yes?"

Your eyes met, and the anger was no longer there, but instead worry and love.

"I love you."

You could feel his genuinity. The words brought a smile to your face, albeit small. "I love you, too, gēgē."

Xiao smiled and left another kiss on your nose. "Sleep now. You had a long night and way past your bed time."

You didn't even protest, you were out like a light bulb as you comfortably laid you head on his shoulder and closed your eyes- not missing the golden dragon floating behind the man who saved you.

~

The walk home was silent. A teleport would be quicker, but Xiao didn't want to disturb your sleep. It was an awkward walk to say the least. Him carrying his sibling, along with the last of his tears stinging his red eyes, all while his master accompanied them home.

But Zhongli- Zhongli was amused. Amused with the blooming dynamic siblinghood between you and Xiao. But he decided to hold his tongue. He knew Xiao was still wrapping his head around what had transpired. Still he does leave a praise to reassure Xiao that everything will be fine.

"You're the best brother your little sibling could ever ask for, Xiao. Remember that."

A/N: Welp ksks lots of loose ends if you squint ksks- like example the tone of the wind spirits, the cat and such

Taglist: @hanniejji @suckerforgenshinboys @arson-frog-art @anime-read-write-repeat @kryzi @riiasekai @sweetstrawberrybabe

[thefanficmonster]

Unconditionally. Completely. Infinitely.

Corpse Husband x Pregnant!Reader

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Five months in and Y/N is not having such a nice time with the tenant that’s living inside her. She loves the company and wouldn’t exchange it for the whole world, but all the disadvantages are getting more annoying with each passing day. No worries, she’s not tackling it alone. Her amazing boyfriend, soon to be fiancé has her back.

Requested by Anon. Thank you so much for you request! As I mentioned in the reply, this is my first time writing a pregnancy fic so if I got anything incorrectly I sincerely apologize. I did some research but I can’t be sure I got everything right. If there’s something you’re not happy with, feel free to let me know. I’d be more than happy to fix the fic to your liking. Hope you enjoy ❤❤❤

“How are you doing, babe?“ This is his third time checking up on me in the last forty minutes and it’s downright hilarious. Since I can’t drink, for obvious reasons, I shoot my group chat a quick text to take a shot every time Corpse drops by to make sure I haven’t chewed off my own arm in frustration.

I’ve been chilling with a bun in the oven for about five and a half months now and it feels like I’m climbing a mountain that never stops getting steeper. I’ve progressively gotten more passive aggressive and cranky as though I myself am a baby. I think I’d be more aggressive and less passive if I could stand on my two legs without the room spinning right round. If I do manage to stand up, my feet won’t let me remain in that position for too long. I’ve heard foot massages help but to me that sounds like hell - I don’t like massages and especially not foot massages. I’d appreciate it if no hands came in contact with them, thank you.

“Yeah, I’m good. Don’t worry about me, I’m not that helpless.“ I give him a reassuring thumbs up. “Go do something fun, babe. Heck, do it twice - one time on my behalf. I don’t want you stuck with me like this.“

I’ve been trying my hardest to be my regular cheery self around Corpse. He’s been nothing but sweet, supportive and loving since day one and he doesn’t deserve to see me during my low points where my frustration is through the roof. Sure, this was kind of an oopsie for the both of us, but I’ll never forget how happy he was when I told him.

“So, you say it’s mine, huh?“ He jokes like this every now and then, never failing to get a giggle out of me.

“I don’t leave the house, silly! Of course it’s yours.“ Is my usual response. And it’s true. I really don’t leave the house. I didn’t leave it before and I can’t leave it even if I wanted to now. The pregnancy is hitting me hard and I spend almost all my days in bed.

It’s not a pleasing sight and I try to spare Corpse as much as I can. I try not to ask for too much from him, or from anyone really. I know I can do most of the things, if not everything, on my own, so why bother my loved ones to have to deal with my messy self.

“I’m not stuck, Y/N. I want to be here.“ He sits down next to me, “Plus, playing video games without you isn’t fun.“

I automatically cuddle up to him when he gets settled on the bed, resting my head on his chest, “Aw I miss play with you. But right now all of my little bit of energy is concentrated on not falling over whenever I stand up.” I start absentmindedly tracing abstract patterns on his chest, “Who knew that in order to develop a human you lose the ability to function as human yourself? I feel like a whale washed up on land. Big, tired and sad.”

He snorts, restraining his laughter just in case it might piss me off. He’s such a sweetheart, but he should know it would take a lot for him to piss me off. Even in this state. “How can I help? I’d do anything, you just tell me what. Maybe a mass-...” I lift my head to give him the well known finish-that-sentence-I-dare-you glare. “Maybe not...”

Suddenly, I feel pressure on both my temples. It’s not yet pain, but I know it will get there soon. I cringe as I force myself to remove my hand from Corpse’s chest, reaching towards the nightstand where there’s always Advil and at least two small bottles of water. I swallow one pill and chase it with a long gulp of water, making a mental note to take another if the pain doesn’t go away in 30-40 minutes.

“You know how you can help me?“ I say, carefully adjusting my position so the both of us are comfortable, “Distract me. Talk to me. Tell me how you see the future with this misfit that’s already giving me headaches.“

He chuckles, the noise vibrating throughout his chest. I can hear the speed on his heartbeat change - it has quickened. I can only write that off as excitement when he speaks: “I don’t think the headaches will go away. I have a frightening feeling they’re just gonna get worse. A lot more sleeplessness, but a lot less vomiting. A lot more standing up and walking around. A lot more smiles and laughter. More of our friends at out house. Who am I kidding? Rae alone will invade the entire house just to spend time with the baby. You and I be damned.”

I find myself visualizing every detail he describes, all the pictures so vivid and so realistic. A smile spreads on my face as I let myself get transported into Corpse’s version of the future. To be honest, his version is almost the exact same as mine, “If she’s so occupied with the baby, maybe we’ll be able to dip out for a date night every now and then. We may be parents, but we’re not even in our mid-twenties yet.” I sigh, closing my eyes for a second, “I now regret not leaving the house more often while I could, you know?”

“Oddly enough, I do too. I feel like I haven’t taken you on enough proper dates. We didn’t seen enough of the world while we had zero responsibilities, it almost feels like it’s too late now.“

I frown, sitting up to be at eye level with him. I gently rest my hand on his cheek, making sure he doesn’t try to avoid eye contact. “Listen here: Fuck the date nights and fuck the responsibilities. I wouldn’t mind being stuck in a single room if you’re there with me.” I think for a second. Deciding not to make the conversation too serious, I add, “That is if we have food and water. Wouldn’t want you to turn into a cannibal on me.”

He smiles, “I’d never and you know it.” I’m aware his response refers to both halves of my statement, putting my mind at ease.

Having sent my message across and having it well received, I sink back down in my previous position. His hand travels to my hair, his fingers combing through it carefully and sweetly, giving me that feeling of being in a bubble of love and safety. His touch has the ability to calm me down, comfort me, encourage me. He is my guiding light through the fog that represents the confusion from all the pain and exhaustion I’ve been suffering through recently. I know those bad sensations will pass, but the power he has over me is forever.

Him and I are forever. Well, Him and I and a new addition in the next four months.

“I love you so much, Y/N.“ He whispers, cutting through the comfortable silence.

“I love you too, Corpse.“ I whisper back.

“I hope our baby is like you. I hope it’ll be smart like you. Talk like you, act like you, look like you.“ He trails of, his voice wavering.

“I hope it’ll sound like you.“ I say mischievously, hiding my smirk in the fabric of his shirt

He laughs, “Sure, unless it’s a girl.”

“Are you kidding me?“ I giggle, “Especially if it’s a girl.“

His laughter rings in my ears, reminding me there’s always gonna be something to hold onto when you’re in pain. Be it his laughter, his touch, the look in his eyes. I’ll always have him there to relieve my pain. To take my mind off all my troubles. To love me.

And for me to love him right back.

Unconditionally. Completely. Infinitely.

@susceptible-but-siriusexual  @simonsbluee  @save-the-sky  @hacker-ghost  @itsminniekat  @bi-andready-tocry  @imtiredaffff  @jazzkaurtheglorious  @hereforbeebo  @fandomgirl17  @chrysanthykios  @maehemscorpyus  @loraleiix  @letsloveimagines  @annshit  @i-cant-choose-a-username-help  @enigmaticmaze  @divine-artemis

[bukojuiice]

something in the rain   — todoroki shoto

ೃ you and shoto were once childhood best friends and sweethearts who had lost touch and communication. 12 years has passed since then, and on a fated summer day in june, there was something in the rain that brought two lost souls back to each other’s arms.

ೃ  pairing: shoto todoroki x fem! reader

ೃ  tags: childhood friends to lovers, tooth-rotting fluff

ೃ  warnings: none! 

ೃ wc: 1k

ೃ  my nav  →  my mha writing masterlist  → my katsuki bakugo x reader smau

ೃ  please do reblog if you enjoyed!! it really helps writers and content creators on tumblr!  if you want to be a part of my mha taglist. send me an ask!  ♡

ೃ song inspo: film out by bts

Puppy Love…

What a sweet and trivial concept.

Was it not?

You and Shoto met each other at the tender age of 7. Roughly two years into his intense and odious training brought upon him by his father. His mother who still unwaveringly continued to support him, would sneak the half and half boy out in between his trainings. Whether to bring him out to play in the local playground, run around in the flower fields, or to just go shopping in the local grocer. These simple things were enough to make the boy happy. Even for just a short moment.

Then, during one fated day, the sun was about to go down, and no other child was frolicking around the playground.

It was just you.

Alone on the swing, your eyes cast down on the ground, wriggling your feet and dipping them into the play sand. You hear a faint creaking sound of the seat next to you and now you were accompanied by a boy the same age as you were. Heterochromatic eyes filled with innocence and love, a smile that looked like it never left the curves of his face, floofy half red and white hair that gave him a very distinct yet striking appearance.

“Why are you all alone?” He inquires, tilting his head. “It’s almost night time too. It’s going to get scary…”

“You came here alone too.” You snapped back, averting his gaze and your mouth forming into a pout.

He shakes his head, “No I didn’t. My Mommy is just there.” He points to a faint silhouette of a woman not far from the two of you.

“Oh.” You blink. “Well, um- my house is just over there! So, my parents don’t need to always keep an eye on me!” You cross your arms, pointing to your house a few feet away from the playground.

“You’re lucky. My dad keeps an eye on me a lot. He’s scary most of the time too and I think it’s because of my quirk…” His shoulders visibly slump as he breathes out a hefty sigh. “Mommy takes me out to go play when I’m done with my training and I’m happy because of it!”

“D-do you wanna play on the slide?” You ask him, twiddling with your fingers. A faint shade of pink present on your cheeks. “If it’s okay, I wanna share my happiness with you!“

His eyes sparkle. “Sure! But…. wait! I don’t even know your name yet!”

“Ah my name’s (Y/N)!”

“I’m Shoto!” He grins, his eyes sparkling once more and you can’t help but become flustered even more.

 Oh, how you wish to see those bright blue and grey eyes again. His fluffy white and crimson hair, and just… feel his lingering presence in your life once more.

Why did time have to go by so fast?

Why did he have to leave?

After a year of feeling nothing but the purest and most blissful emotions whenever you were with him, that all came crashing down when Shoto and his family moved to another city. The reason why was because the neighborhood that you lived in wasn’t “healthy” for him or rather, it was too friendly and Shoto was getting attached to you even though he shouldn’t.

Heroes are built to be as strong as steel after all. Emotionally and Physically. Endeavor doesn’t want his son to be a soft little marshmallow who only beams so brightly whenever he hangs out with the little girl from the quaint neighborhood.

…It’s been 12 years since then.

You’re now a perpetually tired and no-nonsense sophomore college student. Studied hard enough to get a scholarship at one of the most prestigious universities in Japan and now it feels like you’re drowning in a massive amount of school works and extra cred.

Now, looking back at your whimsical childhood life that was only made possible because of one particular Icy-Hot boy, you get a sudden feeling of euphoria course through you as you reminisce the good times.

There was a feeling of inevitability when you met Shoto.

There was something about him that drew you in.

Even at such a young age, you had the sense that the two of you would be together.

That a moment in time would come in where he would look at you in a certain way and the two of you would cross the threshold of friendship into something so much more.

Which proved to be true, as he has always felt the same way as you did.

The two of you knew each other a little better than everyone else.

All the little secrets shared through giggles and fits of laughter, the embarrassing moments shared in a small and dusty playground, and the sweet little memories that the two of you were too young to understand, but what your prying yet loving mothers both noticed.

Your lives were fated to converge like some cosmic dance. Like two shooting stars descending from the night sky. It was always fate.

It was fate that the two of you met. It was fate that the two of you would become friends, playmates, and childhood sweethearts.

But you guess it wasn’t fate that the two of you would remain friends forever.

You are still hoping for a sign in the sky or a word from the stars.

If the two of you are fated to meet again.

The soft boom of thunder and sparkle of lightning awoken you from your slumber.

You had fallen asleep whilst studying for your finals. Just ten minutes of rest. You whispered to yourself.

Those ten minutes ended up becoming an hour and a half wasted and instead of studying and memorizing the chemical formulas, you ended up dreaming about ramen instead.

Some pages of your chemistry book were creased as you had ended up using it as a pillow. You pay this no mind as you mindlessly rub your eyes out of habit, looking out the window, as rain had begun to pour outside.  

You continue to observe the rainfall as the soft sound of droplets hitting the windowpane was so soothing to you, giving you a momentary peace of mind.

Your short meditation moment was soon interrupted with the grumbling of your stomach.

“Mom and Dad aren’t home till 9…” You stretch your arms, groggily murmuring to yourself. “Might as well have a trip to the convenience store.” You hop out of your chair, reaching for a grey hoodie and matching sweatpants from your closet, trying to channel the comfy girl look as you head out.

You lock the door to your house, opening your umbrella as you whistle your way to the convenience store, taking each step carefully hoping you don’t step on any dirty puddles and hoping you see some cute little frogs on the pathway.

You stop in your tracks when you notice a black sedan parked not too far from your house. You raise suspicion a little bit until you remembered that a new family was moving in the house near you, so you decided to just brush off your skepticism.

“Welcome to Conbini! May I kindly ask you to leave your umbrella by the door?” The cashier greets you, trying to force a customer-friendly smile. They might have had a rough week and you don’t want to be labeled as those jerk kinds of customers so you nod at her and leave your parasol at the entrance.

“Oh my god.” You were about to drop the bags of food in your hands when you notice that your umbrella was gone from the parasol stand, another customer possibly mistaking their umbrella for yours. You sigh in defeat. “You know what, heck it. I could care less at this point.” You pull up your hoodie, dashing your way back home, hoping you don’t end up getting sick from this careless situation you’ve put yourself into.

You stop in your tracks once again when you see a dashing-looking man standing in front of the gates of your house.

tall, well built, half and half colored hair that was wet and tangled, wearing a long and patterned coat, hands in his pockets… it felt as if he was waiting for someone to come out of your home.

Could this be…?

He was alerted by the sound of your steps rippling with the puddles in the pavement, turning to face you, his umbrella twirling with him.

His eyes grow wide at the sight of seeing you, and you notice his chest rise up, like a feeling of relief and of hope.

“(Y/N)…?”

“S-shoto?”

These are still the beautiful heterochromatic eyes you know and love. Only this time, it had a darker hue reflecting from his orbs. These are eyes who have seen and who have gone through so much.

You can’t even believe it.

Here he was, standing right in front of you. The boy you loved all those years ago.

Even more handsome, mature, and striking, and yet you could feel this broken emptiness radiating from him. Emotional scars that still run deep through him and… at this moment, you just want him to bare his heart to you. All this pain and suffering he has felt all these years.

You feel droplets of water sliding down your cheek like crystal teardrops.

“It’s really you…” You were about to drop the bags of food in your hands due to your blissful bewilderment but Shoto rushes to you with his umbrella, shielding you from the storm.

He was a bit too close and you could feel the heat rush up to your cheeks again, a feeling you have not experienced in so many years.

“Ah. I’m sorry.” He steps back a little from you and you can hear yourself internally monologue “nooo” as he takes a few steps away. “It’s been 12 years isn’t it?” He catches your attention again.

“It is. Yeah...” You nod, still looking up at him, a certain twinkle in your eyes and an inexplicable feeling growing in your chest. “W-what brings you here?” You add, your voice soft and sweet, whether you did this on purpose or not will forever remain a question.

“My family… we’re moving back here.” He replies quickly. solemn, yet there was a tint of excitement in his tone. “My father thought it was best if my mother, my siblings and I lived in a different house than him after… all the pain that he made us go through… and so… here we are.”

“Oh! Would you like to come inside and have some coffee?” You ask, pointing your finger to your humble abode. “We have a lot of catching up to do.” You giggle jokingly, trying to keep the atmosphere light and warm despite the cold weather present around you.

You start heading to the direction of your house, knowing that Shoto will follow you inside until… 

he grabs you by the arm, enveloping and pulling you in for a tight yet soft and comforting hug. A feeling that you’ve been wistfully longing for such a long time. 

A feeling that only Shoto Todoroki could give.

“I missed you so much (Y/N)… can you share your happiness again with me?”

In the midst of the rainy summer season that brought nothing but dim and grey skies, wet and damp atmosphere, and endless floods of sorrow, you were his spring. The rosebud opening in the watery sunshine.

The whimsical girl with grass-stained knees running around the meadow with him… like a prophecy telling him that new beginnings were about to come, your personality and your appearance reminded him of the cherry blossom trees that symbolized a time of renewal.

You were the rainbow after a storm. Spreading light and color to those around her…

The one who brought back light and color to his life again.

 “from all the memories stored in my heart”

I only picked up and connected the ones of you.”

  ೃ taglist: @chibishae34  @lovelytarou​ @ramunegoddess​, @serossimpy @laudthingcat​

[persephone-is-here-omg]

In Nomine Patris.

Pairing: Priest!Bucky Barnes/Reader.

Warnings: Smut. This fic features explicit sexual content involving a catholic priest, if that isn’t your thing or it offens you skip this one. If you know this offends you and you still read it, whatever feelings you experience after are your problem, not mine. Otherwise, enjoy. Slight chocking.

Word Count: 5530.

Rating: 18+.

Masterlist.

Father Barnes has your panties in his pocket.

_____________

You brush your hands nervously down your dress as you step into the church and locate the few family members that have made it out today to your youngest cousin’s First Communion. Truth be told you haven’t been near a church in almost three years, struggling with your faith and the relationship with your family has left you nearly isolated. You scurry to a place beside your aunt and greet her with a smile and a kiss as she points out to your cousin, seated on one of the very first benches on the dress that has become somewhat of a family relic, you wave at her and blow a kiss in her direction as she smiles and sits back down.

Your eyes move around the church from the back to the front slowly, landing on some familiar faces. When your gaze falls on the priest your heart skips a beat, he looks at you intently, his blue eyes fixed on you and you can’t look away. His lips curl slightly upwards, he looks away, you don’t know what his expression means and your aunt looks at you “I see you’ve discovered the new priest”

You look at her and blink in confusion, you had been away so long that the priest had been changed and you had no knowledge about it, you look at him again and notice the glove in his left hand, your curiosity picking up.

“When did he arrive?” You ask her, trying to not sound as affected as you feel.

“Monday. Antonia wouldn’t stop talking about him until I reminded her that he is a man of God and talking that way about him was wrong”

You nod, your eyes finding him again as he directs the altar boys in preparing everything for Mass.

Soon enough mass starts and everyone is listening intently to what Father Barnes has to say, you think about how much you’d rather be anywhere but here. Mass advances and the kids at the front are lining up to take the Communion for the first time, Father Barnes instructs everyone else to wait until they are done, then the adults will be able to take theirs. Your cousin waves as she heads back towards her seat, a serene smile on her lips.

Slowly everyone else starts to file into the queue, you included using your hands to smooth down your dress, your nerves grow as you come closer and closer to the front and face to face with Father Barnes. You consider going back to your seat, but if you do you probably won’t hear the end of it.

The person in front of you walks away and you look at him, his eyes are a bright blue and deep, his lips are full and he has a beard framing them. The short hair is styled carefully, but classically. You open your mouth as he raises his hand to it.

“The body of Christ” He says, his fingers press the Sacramental Bread against your tongue, his fingers applying some pressure on it, something no priest has ever done before. You look at him wide eyed, as your lips close around the tips of his fingers, something you have never done to a priest before. Your heart beats fast as you step away and lower your eyes trying to push what just happened away from your mind.

That night you fall prey to a fitful sleep, tossing and turning, unable to get any real rest.

Monday morning you’re surprised when your aunt knocks on your door as you are having your morning coffee, she walks in and looks at you “There’s a part time job at the church. It could help you” She says.

You look at her over the rim of your mug “What’s the job?”

“Father Barnes needs someone to help him organize things in the church, buy supplies, just run errands for him in general” she explains “Will you take it?”

“Well… I haven’t even met Father Barnes yet” You say “But I’ll go and see” You’re not excited at the prospect of working in a church, but you don’t have many options available, and your savings are suffering from it.

Your aunt looks at you and nods “I have to leave, I’ll see you later”

You nod “Ok. See you around”

You look around in case you see Father Barnes or any of his acolytes. You find him standing in front of the Altar, his hands in his pocket and his back to you. You clear your throat to make your presence behind him known “F- Father Barnes?” You ask and can’t help but notice that he is taller than he seems, his back is wide and his shoulders look strong.

He turns around, for a moment you could swear he smirks, but he smiles at you “Yes, and you are? I saw you yesterday during the First Communion mass”

You give him your name and offer him your hand. His handshake is firm, the warmth of it is almost too much, but you smile back at him “I heard you’re looking for someone to help part time here at the church”

“Yes! Yes, I am. Don’t get me wrong, the boys are good, but they’re kids. They’re better off playing and having fun than spending time cooped up in here”

“Probably shouldn’t say that to their parents, though” You laugh and nod in agreement “I don’t… Well, I don’t know if I’m what you’re looking for”

Father Barnes looks at you with a weird intensity in his eyes “You are” He says and then adds “If you’re free part time. You’re the only person that’s come up until now”

“I didn’t know. I understand if you want to keep your options open”

Father Barnes shakes his head “No, no. You’re perfect. More than perfect”

Your face heats up, unable to stop the feeling that he means more than being perfect for the job “Thank you” You pull out pen and paper from your bag and write down your name and phone number “Just in case you decide I’m the right person for the job”

“I’ve already decided” He says “When can you start?”

You are taken by surprise “Tomorrow, if you need me to”

“See? You’re perfect” Father Barnes repeats “I’ll keep this” He takes the piece of paper with your name and number on it “We’ll need to keep in contact. Please, could you take the advert off when you leave?”

You swallow and nod “Of course. Have a good evening, Father Barnes”

“You too”

You leave the church and follow his instructions about taking the ad down, then head to the grocery store, you browse the aisles slowly, taking your time in picking up everything you need to buy. 

You collide against a wall of solid muscle and gasp as you look up, coming face to face with Father Barnes "I'm… Father… I'm sorry" You say, avoiding his eyes. But noticing that he is wearing normal clothes.

"Is ok. Just an accident" He says searching your eyes "Are you ok?" 

"Yes, I was just distracted. Didn't see you" 

"No problem" He says and takes your basket "I'll help you with this" Father Barnes starts walking in the same direction you were going before "Do you have a car?" He asks, observing you intently.

"No, I'll just… I just take the bus" 

"Is a bit late" Father Barnes points out "I can drive you"

You look at him and nod "Ok. Thank you" You say with a smile as you pick a box of rose tea and put it on your basket. The silence spreads between you two as you walk through the aisles, picking up different products to take with you. 

The two of you walk out of the grocery store a few minutes later and go toward his car. The car is nothing flashy, a small, black sedan, that you wonder for a second how does he fit inside. Father Barnes opens the back door for you and lets you put your bags in there, you feel his eyes on you as you do so, never leaving you and when you tip too far forward and almost fall inside the car his arm wraps around your waist and holds you up "Careful there, doll" His voice rumbles in your ears and you breathe slowly to calm your nerves as he helps you stand up.

"I'm so sorry about that" You say and step away as you turn around looking at him "I lost my balance"

"No need to worry" Father Barnes says, a smile on his lips, as he grabs the car door and corners you between the open door and his body. 

Your eyes find his and he steps back, letting you move away and then closing the car door. 

Father Barnes opens the passenger side door for you and you get in, his eyes fix on your legs as your wrap dress opens, revealing the smooth skin of your thighs, your eyes lock for a brief moment and then he closes the door and runs to the other side, you fix your dress and your coat, making sure you’re covered.

He gets in on the driver's side and starts the car, steering it out of the parking lot. His eyes are fixed on the road and you try not to look at him, but your eyes keep straying towards his face.

"Thank you for driving me… you really didn't have to"

Father Barnes turns toward you for a second, then looks back to the road "Is nothing really. And your place is on my way back to the church. I'll drive you home any time you have to stay late, so transportation shouldn't be a problem"

"Oh, no. You don't have to do that, really. And people would talk, if you did"

"That doesn't concern me" The way he says it leaves no room for arguing. So you just nod and look ahead.

"Thank you for the opportunity, Father Barnes. I'm between jobs, so this will give me something to do"

"Call me James or Bucky, please" He says "Father Barnes is too formal"

"But… You… I…" You babble and Father Barnes, James, shakes his head a friendly smile on his lips.

"I insist, please. At least while there's no one but us around"

You take a deep breath and nod "Sure, then… James" You say softly.

A while later Father Barnes, James, stops in front of your small apartment building. He looks at it out the window and smiles at you "Is it a nice place?" He asks.

"The nicest I can afford" You say "Is a good place, not too big, but I live alone, so that is not a problem"

“Then, I’ll see you tomorrow” James says looking at you “Can you be there at noon?”

You nod “Of course”

“Another thing, I know the fliers said part time, but… If you’re at all available for full time, I’d appreciate the help”

You think for a moment “Yes! I do need the job so, the more hours I can get, the better. I’ll see you tomorrow, then”

“Yes” He says and just as you open the door and turn to get out of the car he grips your wrist firmly and makes you turn to look back “Thank you”

You swallow and smile again then, after he lets go of your wrist, you get out of the car, take your bags from the back and rush inside.

Your heart races as you close the door behind you and set the bags on the kitchen counter, and you shake your head as you try to clear your thoughts “Of course none of this means anything. He’s a priest” You say out loud, more to convince yourself and try to calm your racing heart than anything, really. Your hands tremble slightly as you put the groceries away.

The hot water helps you relax. Soon enough you’re wearing your pajamas and getting into bed. The long day soon taking its toll on you as you fall asleep almost as soon as you are under the covers, your dreams are hazy and heady and you can’t quite remember them as you wake up, your hips rocking into your pillow slowly but desperately.

You’re not sure of where you are exactly as you wake up, but your eyes land on your clock and, you realize, is still too early for you to start getting ready for work, so you end up laying back down and trying to get some more sleep. But, after whatever dream you had you can barely think straight. You sit up and decide to start your day early, going for an elaborate breakfast and an even more difficult lunch that you pack neatly in an effort to waste the free time at your disposal and trying to keep your mind from straying into whatever happened last night in Father Barnes car. Nothing happened, anyway. So why are you so nervous about going in today?

You hope this new job is something temporary, you have been questioning your faith for a long time now and spending time in a church with an admittedly attractive priest is something that won’t help you in the least. If it was in your hands you’d stay as far away from the church as possible, but you need the money and James, as he insists you call him, is paying very good money for such a position.

You step inside the church smoothing your dress down and making sure nothing that would be considered inappropriate is visible. He is already waiting for you by the Altar, for a moment you wonder if he should use a shirt like that. Your curiosity about his gloved hand pikes up again, but you refrain from asking or even setting your eyes on his arm, not sure how he would take that question or the scrutiny.

You smile at him as you stop in front of Father Barnes, James, you remind yourself “Father” Stopping you correct yourself “James”

James smiles at you “Welcome” He starts walking and you follow him out into the inner yard of the church and toward his office “This will be where we’ll spend most of our time together. I will mostly need you to help me organize schedules, do you remember the previous priest’s one?” He asks.

You shake your head “I… I’ve been… I haven’t been coming to church regularly” 

“Questioning your faith?” He says inquisitively, his eyes never leaving yours.

“I’m not…” You trail off, realizing that it is probably quite obvious for James that you have been struggling with your faith for a very long time, your relationship with your family already complicated before you stopped attending Church, suffering even more about it. They didn’t appreciate your positions on a variety of subjects and made certain you knew about it.

James smiles at you “That’s ok. It won’t be a problem. Everyone goes through that” He takes your hand between his “Right now, the most important thing is that you can help me organize the mess in here” He chuckles and let’s go of your hand.

“That shouldn’t be a problem” You say, looking around and trying not to think about your hand in his “We could get a couple more filing cabinets, to start”

“I’ll have to see what I can do. But that shouldn’t be so hard to get” James says.

The filing cabinets arrive a few days later and you delve into the task of ordering all the files, especially the ones concerning the church’s finances starting by the oldest ones available. You focus entirely on the work at hand, the time going by as you go through folder after folder of disorganized paperwork. You jump, startled when there is a knock on the door and look over your shoulder, smiling when you see James standing at the door.

“How are you?” He asks, his voice low and deep traveling through the small space.

“I’m ok… I think I lost track of time” You admit “But I have gone through a good amount of folders now, so I think this will be ready sooner than I thought”

“That’s great to hear” James says stepping inside “I was wondering if you’d like some pizza? Is late and I don’t think you’ve eaten”

You look at him “That’s very nice of you, James, but you really don’t have to do it. I don’t want to impose”

“You are not imposing in any way… Just a few slices, then I’ll drive you home” He insists and offers you his gloved hand, which you take. It feels strangely hard, almost like some kind of prosthetic, he uses it to help you stand up from the floor.

“Thank you” James lets go of your hand and you smooth your dress down, follow him down the hall towards the small apartment in the back of the church’s grounds.

James opens the door and lets you step in “Over here” He says walking towards the kitchen “Sit down” James points you towards the stools, sits down beside you and tugs the pizza box over, flipping the lid “Ladies first”

You smile at him and take a slice “Thank you” The bite of pizza you take tastes amazing and you hum, smiling “This is amazing”

“Is from that place down the road from here” James explains.

You laugh “Oh, I used to go there all the time back when I was still in school” You take another bite “With the girls that used to be my friends”

“Not your friends anymore?” He asks and you shake your head, swallowing the pizza.

“Not anymore… We just drifted apart, probably the fact that they all are married with kids already and I’m not doesn’t really help”

“And that you are not coming to church?”

“Not a nice addition to the mix” You admit and look at him “Do you ever… Think about what would your life be if you weren’t a priest?”

James smiles and takes a sip of water “Sometimes”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that” 

He chuckles “Is just a question, doll” The word doll slips out casually and your face heats up “I do think about it. Everyone wonders about the what ifs, don’t they?”

“I guess so” You follow the movement of his gloved hand as it moves and takes yours, you notice the hardness of his hand again, you almost open your mouth to ask, but his strength caughts you by surprise as he pulls you into a bruising kiss.

He lets go of your hand and both his arms wrap around your waist, holding you tight against his firm chest. James’ lips feel unyielding and soft against yours, his tongue licks your bottom lip and you open your mouth in response to his actions, giving him the chance to deepen the kiss, your hands move from his shoulders into his hair, fingers knotting on the silky brown strands. You whimper when he bites your lower lip and pull your face away, breathing hard.

“What… Why did you do that?” Is the first thing that comes out of your mouth.

James licks his lips, but doesn’t answer your question.

“I think I should go” You say standing up and James takes your hand, stopping you.

“Is late, I should drive you” James stands in front of you and lets go of your hand “Let’s go”

You stare at James for a few seconds and start walking behind him, unsure of what to do now.

James opens the door to his car and lets you get in, as he closes the door and walks to, jogs really, to the driver’s side your mind goes back to his arms around your waist, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, jumping as James closes the door.

“Are you ok?” His voice is low and he sounds concerned.

“I… I’m ok. I just didn’t expect that” You say.

The silence extends as James drives and you wonder if you should even go back to the church, you’d have to come up with an excuse to explain why you left the job so soon, but you can come up with something. You’ve done it before. You can do it again.

James parks the car and turns to look at you, but doesn’t say anything until you turn to look at him, his hand clasps on the back of your neck and his lips are on yours again, demanding. You whimper and he takes the chance, pulling you closer, your arms are around his neck, one of your hands on his hair before you can stop yourself.

“This is not ok” Your voice trembles and so do your hands, placing them on his chest to distance yourself from him “We have… We have to stop” You turn around and open the door of the car and get out.

Your heels click on the pavement as you walk towards the door of your building, you think James will come after you, but he doesn’t. A part of you genuinely wishes he did, it makes you feel like you’re not good enough to chase after. The other part of you is relieved. You don’t have the best track record, people still look at you and whisper under their breath when they see you in church, rumors of you and the new priest? That would not help.

You run up the stairs to your floor and then open your door, close it behind you and throw your bag and jacket on the couch, then start pacing. Mind racing as you go over what happened. You should have seen this coming, you should have. The way he looked at you that night he drove you home. How you were never sure if he was talking about your work or you. Do you have to quit? The anxiety starts to eat at you because how are you going to explain that you had to quit a comfortable, well paid job. You know how your family would react, you have seen it before. But the thing is, and this is the real issue, that you are not sure you want to leave.

You know you won’t be able to sleep tonight. Not when every time you close your eyes all you can think about is his hands on you, his arms around your waist, his lips. You shake your head and start pacing again. You know you didn’t start it. You would have never acted on it, not on your own. Would you? You walk over to the window and look out of it, you can see his car is still there. The temptation to go back out is strong, so much so that you turn around and walk back to your door, take your jacket, your keys and head back down.

The car is still there and you stop, should you go back? James notices you standing there and gets out of the car, walks decisively towards you and cups your face again, his lips crashing against yours as he kisses you one more time “Why did you come back down?”

“I…” You start but stop again “I saw your car still here, I don’t know…”

James takes a deep breath “You should go back up… We can’t do this. Not in public”

“We shouldn’t. Not in public and not in private” You counter.

“I will see you tomorrow” The way he says it, is almost as if he is certain you will show up the next day.

Will he see you tomorrow? You don’t know, you rest your forehead on your hands and think back on the way his lips feel on you. Almost like being branded by him. A shiver runs down your spine and you stand up, go to the fridge and get the vodka bottle out, open it and take a swig off of it, your face scrunches and you sit back down, closing your eyes. The decision is only yours, but not showing will have your family asking questions, they always ask questions. Just not the ones they should ask. Never those ones.

You step into the church and look around as the few people present start to walk out, you can’t see him and take a deep breath. You are not sure what you’ll do. Not yet, at least. James walks into the church and waits until every other person inside it, except you, has left to close the doors. All of them.

His steps are fast when he starts walking towards you. James stops in front of you 2I wasn’t sure you’d come today”

You shrug “I wasn’t sure either. I’m not really sure what I am doing here” The admission slips out of you and you can not stop it. It feels almost like getting rid of a heavy weight over your shoulders.

“Why did you close the church?”

“I don’t want to take any unnecessary risks” 

“Risks? This is already risky enough” You counter and shake your head slowly “What… Whatever…” You stop and take a deep breath “What happened last night it shouldn’t have happened. You could… You don’t understand. We can’t”

James grips your chin in his hand and wraps his left arm around your waist, pulling you close, so close there’s no space between the two of you and he kisses you.

His kiss is intense, bruising, the beard framing his face scratches at your skin, you feel the burn on it and moan. You push on his chest for a moment and then wrap your arms around his neck, stand on your tiptoes and push your body closer to his muscular one.

James lets go of your chin, hand moving down your arm slowly, lets go of your hand and grips your hip, squeezes for a moment and then moves it around, to squeeze your ass.

You jump and gasp, opening your eyes and looking at him, eyes wide and hands trembling. This is wrong. The voice in your head says. Is your mother’s voice. It says it is your fault. Everything is your fault.

You shake your head to try and silence it. Let the feeling of James’ hands on you drown everything else. It feels good and you want it. You want it. Your fingers play with the collar on James’ shirt and he takes your other hand, brings it to his mouth and kisses the tips of your fingers.

You look down, at your fingers over his collar “Are you sure… This could end badly” You say.

“I am. I can’t stop thinking about you. Ever since I saw you that day” He admits, kissing each of your fingers again “I can’t”

You’re the one who starts the kiss now, fingers closing  around the fabric of his shirt. You bite his lower lip when his hand squeezes your ass again, moaning his name.

James lifts you up with one arm and, by instinct, you wrap your legs around his waist, clinging to him as he starts to walk. You’re not sure where he’s going until he places you on top of the table and you stare at him in shock “Here? We… Here?”

“Yes, here” He says in that voice that makes you think that arguing is pointless.

James just sets you down on the Altar and you swallow hard, you’d think a priest would be more concerned about this, but his eyes have turned dark, only a thin ring of blue around them. It makes a shiver run down your spine. James steps between your legs and kisses your lips again, big hands cupping your face, thumbs caressing your cheeks. His hands move down to the sides of your neck, your shoulders, your waist “I can’t stop thinking about this” He repeats.

“Me either. You’re in my head all the time” You admit, playing again with his collar, it comes loose and you look at it between your fingers. James takes the collar from you and places it beside you on the altar, then his hands are tugging your skirt up, fingers skimming over your boots, he looks down when his fingers change from suede to smooth skin. He licks his lips and that affects you, it makes you whimper. His hands on you make your skin feel like it is on fire, like you will burst into flames and be turned to ashes and dust right there. Maybe is what you deserve for what you’re doing now. Maybe is what will happen.

You lift your hips so he can tug your panties down, but instead he takes his glove off and you see a metal hand he rips your panties and stuffs them in his pocket. You swallow and move your hands down his chest and further down his stomach, reach his belt and unbuckle it, tugging at his shirt after and following with the button and zipper on his pants. Your hand is inside his pants before you can really think about it and you squeeze his cock over his underwear.

James groans, licking his lips and crashing them against yours again, tugging you closer to him as you push his pants down his legs, you look down between the two of you, and take a deep breath to steady yourself. He wraps his left hand over yours, firmly, lips ghosting over yours. James takes your hand away and, finally, you feel him tease your slit with the tip of his cock. You nod, opening your mouth and closing it again. You can’t talk, you want to, but you can’t find the words. He thrusts in, a slow, fluid motion that leaves you entirely breathless, mouth hanging open as you throw your head back, something that James reads as an opening to go for your neck, his kisses are fervent and his teeth scrape against your skin, leaving a delicious sting in their wake.

You wrap your arms around his neck just as he pulls almost out and thrusts back in, the same slow and fluid motion as before, making you shiver and moan his name in his ear, your walls tightening around his cock, your eyes closed, hands buried in his hair as you tug and arch your back. Throwing your head back. 

James’s left hand grips your jaw and makes you look at him, his intense blue eyes fixed on you as your legs tighten on his sides. He kisses your lips again, swallowing your moans, your groans, your whines. Claiming every sound you make as his. The hand on your jaw moves slowly down to your neck, tightening around just a little bit. Just enough for your nails to dig on the small of James’ back as you gasp after a deep thrust. James looks at you again, his gaze consumes you, takes hold inside you. 

“Fuck” You groan, clamping around James when his pelvic bone drags against your clit.

“I want to cum inside you, make you mine” James whispers in your ear, the arm around your back tightening and holding you in place.

You nod, slowly. Kiss him and nod again “Do it” You say “Please”

James pushes you to lay back, his left hand on your chest as you go down, his hands wrap themselves around your thighs and tug you closer to the edge of the altar, flush against his hips. James’ cock buried deep inside you, so deep you feel like you have trouble breathing. His left gloved hand moves to where your bodies join and circles your clit, it feels so good you almost try to flinch away. But James holds you in place as you bite your lip and look at him, wide eyed and pleading for him to keep going. He doesn’t stop circling your clit until you cry out his name, breathless, as you cum around his cock. Your vision goes white as the orgasm stretches through your body, it makes you tighten up and then relax almost completely as you fist the cloth over the altar.

“That’s it” James encourages, his own hips starting to stutter in their pace, he licks his lips as you push on your elbows to watch him, eyes moving down his torso, to his cock thrusting in and out of you. He growls low in his throat, hips grinding into you as he cums “Fuck” He mutters, grinding again into you.

You sit up and cup his face, kiss his lips. He wraps his arms around your middle again and rests his forehead against yours “Are you ok?”

You nod, slowly “I am… I just…”

“We’ll be careful” James says “No one can know”

“Yes, I know… The people here, they wouldn’t…”

James looks at you “I know they don’t like you being around, but I have your back. I’m here”

You take a deep breath and decide to put your trust in him. Whatever happens.

[thisissirius]

for @capseycartwright​ who CONSTANTLY screams about fic with me and is my pillar of support in the trying times of europe timezones and watching the episodes.

nothing left to lose but everything i have [ao3 link] eddie/buck, buck begins spoilers, buck emotions and best friend feels.

If that’s how you feel, you have every right to say something. 

Sometimes, Eddie needs to take his own advice. 

Watching Buck’s anger, the casual way he said hit things like neither of them had a personal reminder of why that was a bad idea, it hurt. Buck was suffering in ways he refused to talk about, ways that Eddie couldn’t understand.

“You can talk to me,” he says, to what might as well be a brick wall. 

“You can come over,” though he knows Buck won’t. 

“I don’t want to see you hurting,” that he only ever says when he’s alone. 

Then. 

“Defective parts,” and Eddie feels adrift, unable to parse Buck with the idea that he’s only ever been spare parts. 

“That’s not on you,” Eddie says, because how could Buck think— 

When Buck says, “I doubt they would agree,” Eddie wants to scream. Or find the Buckleys and tell them— 

Buck’s everything. 

______

Later, when Buck’s on his way to the hospital, Eddie stays behind. 

He’s there when the Buckleys show up and he doesn’t know what he’s expecting, but for them to be so kind and polite is not it. Eddie leans against the balcony as they listen to kind words about Buck from those filtering through. Chim, Hen, a couple of other guys. Eddie stays silent from most of it, avoiding the looks Chim and Hen throw him. 

When he thinks about just walking away—he refuses to talk to them as if everything’s normal—Margaret turns to him. “Do you—”

“Margaret,” Chim starts, because he knows. 

“I know Buck,” Eddie says casually. “Better than anyone else in this room.”

Margaret looks taken aback, and Philip opens his mouth, but Eddie doesn’t let him get a word out. 

“I’m his best friend,” Eddie continues, pushing himself up. He’s not an overly tall guy, but he knows he can look intimidating when he wants to. He doesn’t want to, he just needs them to understand. “I almost watched him die today.”

“What,” Margaret starts, pressing a hand to her mouth. 

Philip looks shocked. “What happened?”

“A fire,” Eddie says calmly. 

“He’s okay,” Chim says quickly, throwing Eddie a dark look. 

“Yeah, he is,” Eddie agrees. 

Chim shakes his head. “So why bring it up?”

“Do you think they care?” Eddie asks. There’s a silence in the room he hates. “If they cared, they’d have been here after the fire truck. After the blood clots, or the tsunami.”

“You have no idea,” Margaret starts. 

“What it’s like to lose a kid?” Eddie sees the way they close down, offended, and he sighs. “No, you’re right, I don’t. But I did abandon my kid. I went to war and was treated like a hero for abandoning my kid. But you know what? I fixed it. He was six, and I fixed it. I came home and I loved him and I still love him. You can tell me you love Buck,” he continues, when Philip opens his mouth, “but if Buck doesn’t feel it? I don’t give a shit, and he’s never talked about you beyond a sentence or two.”

Hen stands. “Eddie.”

“No, Hen,” he says, and wonders why he’s not angrier about this. He’s just exhausted for Buck, wonders how he’s come out the way he has with parents like this. “I’ve listened to everything he’s screamed at me,” he continues, addressing Margaret and Philip once again. “He doesn’t tell me, but I can see it anyway. And right now? He thinks he’s defective parts.” Again, a flinch. “Buck deserves so much better than you’ve given him.”

“We lost a son,” Margaret says, and Eddie hates the pain in her voice. He can remember too clearly Buck standing in front of him, that split second he thought he’d lost Chris for good. 

Eddie nods. “You did. But you had another son. Buck, who I’m grateful for every day, who probably wouldn’t be here if you’d been decent parents, but I can’t even thank you for that. Because you hurt Buck, time and again. Made him think he wasn’t good enough, and I can tell you from personal experience that it sucks.”

Silence. 

“I love him,” Eddie says, and doesn’t care what they infer from that. “My son loves him. He’s a good parent,” he adds, because it’ll hurt and some vicious part of him wants it to. “I think he learned it from Maddie.”

______

Downstairs, Eddie takes a moment. Cap’s on his way back with Buck and he needs to get his shit together because Buck needs him to. 

Knuckles rap on the doorframe and Eddie sighs. “I’m not sorry.”

Hen makes a noise in the back of her throat. “I didn’t expect you would be.”

They lapse into a calm silence, and Eddie breathes out, in, out. “They needed to hear it.”

“Perhaps.” Hen crosses the room, standing in front of him, but Eddie doesn’t look at her. “You’re hurting.”

"Buck needs me to be strong," Eddie says, staring down at his hands and ignoring the implication.

Hen sits opposite him, resting a hand on his knee. Eddie looks up, meets her eyes. "Who's strong for you?"

Eddie opens his mouth, closes it.

"Eddie, you're allowed help, too."

"I know," Eddie says, because he does. "I don't wanna put that on anyone."

Hen nods, and he's grateful she gets it. "I'll take it." Eddie shakes his head, but Hen's hand squeezes his leg gently. "Eddie, I'm not asking."

Eddie doesn't know what to say, feels the burning in his eyes. "Thanks, Hen."

_______

“I know you did,” Eddie says, and means I love you. 

Watching Buck walk away, knowing the things he’ll probably hear— 

“They’re hearing more stories,” Hen assured him. 

Eddie doubts that’ll distract from the things he said. Cap tells him to go home. Chim doesn’t seem to know what to say to him. Hen watches him. Eddie waits. He needs Buck to know he’s not gonna just walk out when shit’s going down in his life.

“Eddie,” Buck says, coming down the stairs. “Can I talk to you?”

“Yeah.” Eddie feels his stomach swoop, and he leads them out onto the main drive. “Buck, I—”

Buck presses a hand to Eddie’s chest and Eddie’s mouth shuts so abruptly he almost bites his tongue. There’s a quiet devastation to Buck that hurts like a knife through Eddie’s chest. “Chim just said—Maddie—I need to go and see Maddie.”

It’s not what Eddie’s expecting. “Okay.”

“Eddie,” Buck says, and he looks confused, hurt. Eddie reaches up, curls his fingers around Buck’s wrist. “She let Doug—”

“Come over later,” Eddie says quietly, before he can change his mind. “After you speak to Maddie?”

Buck hesitates. “Yeah?”

“Please,” Eddie says, and hates himself for begging. He doesn’t know how to continue, but he can see Buck needs him to. Maybe parts of him are still unsure, but Eddie thinks it’s the confusion, complete life-changing information he’s had thrown at him. “Chris will wanna see you.”

“And you?” Buck asks tentatively. 

Eddie nods, decides to be honest. “Always.”

_____

Time stretches. 

Eddie doesn’t remember much of what happens between leaving the station and the key in his door. Chris is getting ready for bed, excited for Buck to come over, and Eddie closes his eyes, tries to dig for the strength he needs. 

Call me whenever you need, Hen texts, just after dinner. 

Buck’s not the only person who’s found family in LA. 

“Hey,” Buck says quietly. “Is Chris—”

“Just getting ready for bed,” Eddie assures him. “Are you okay?”

Buck opens his mouth to answer.

“Buck,” Chris says, over whatever Buck might reveal. “You came!”

Everything about Buck changes. It’s not a front; Eddie knows Buck well enough to see. The love shining out of every part of Buck, the way he’ll always get on Christopher’s level, the affection in his expression and voice when he says, “of course I did. I always keep my promises.”

Chris comes over for a goodnight hug and kiss, and then he and Buck disappear down the hall. Eddie concentrates on breathing in and out, doesn’t know why he feels so untethered when it’s Buck’s life on a spiral. Again, time slips away from him, and he startles when a hand touches his face.

“Hey,” Buck says.

“Sorry,” Eddie says quickly, sitting up. “You shouldn’t have to—”

“I can’t handle this,” Buck says, talking quickly, “if you treat me like I’m gonna break.”

Eddie shakes his head. “I don’t think that. Buck, you’re the strongest person I know.”

Buck doesn’t seem to know what to say. He moves around Eddie’s legs, dropping onto the couch next to him. He rubs his hands on his jeans, and Eddie reaches over, takes the one closest to him and squeezes. Buck nods to himself. “I forgave them.”

“Okay,” Eddie says quietly, waiting to follow Buck’s lead. 

“I thought it would be harder,” Buck continues. He smiles, but there’s nothing funny about it. “But you know why it wasn’t?”

This one Eddie does know. “You don’t care enough for it to matter.”

Buck nods, swallowing, and dragging Eddie’s hand closer, holding it against his stomach. Eddie’s glad he can be whatever Buck needs him to be. “Yeah. You always understand me. Apparently my parents know that too.”

Eddie refuses to be ashamed about it. “I hate that they’re so—they think their grief entitles them to treat you the way they have and it doesn’t.”

“Eddie—”

“I wish you’d had better,” Eddie admits carefully, meeting Buck’s eyes. “You deserve better.”

There’s a shine to Buck’s eyes, and he squeezes Eddie’s hand. “I don’t want to see them again.”

Good. “Okay.”

“I need you to—keep me straight on it, okay, because I might cave because I always you do.”

“No, you don’t,” Eddie says, shifting so that he can look at Buck properly. He leans in a little, needs Buck to understand. “You wanted to be loved, Buck, but you don’t need them for that. You have me. Us,” he amends, not because he’s ashamed, because he needs Buck to know there’s more than just Eddie for him. “All of us.”

“I know,” Buck whispers, and there’s truth in his words, his expression. 

“You can do this.” Eddie nods. “You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

Buck uses his free hand to pull out his phone, seemingly reluctant to let go of Eddie’s had. “Can you,” he says, “delete their numbers for me?”

Eddie would do anything for Buck, and Buck knows it. This, though, he won’t do. “No,” he says, but holds tightly to Buck in case he tries to pull away. “I would do anything,” he continues, catching Buck’s gaze and holding it, “but this you need to do for yourself. I can forget them about as easily as I’ve known them, but this is yours to let go of.”

“You’ll be there?”

“Whenever you need me to be.” Eddie sees Buck’s finger hover over his phone. “It doesn’t have to be now.”

“I want it to be,” Buck says honestly, looking up. “I want to do it now, with you. Like this.”

“Alright,” Eddie allows. He watches, rubbing a thumb over Buck’s hand as Buck deletes them from his phone contacts, from his emails. He even sends a text to Maddie to let her know what he’s done. Buck puts the phone face down on the arm of the couch and Eddie says, “I’m proud of you.”

Buck sounds wrecked when he says, “Eddie.”

Eddie waits.

“I think I need a hug.”

“I said whatever you need,” Eddie says, “and I meant it.”

Buck hesitates a fraction of a second and then all but falls into Eddie. Eddie wraps his arms around Buck, tucks Buck’s head under his chin and waits for the flood. It comes slowly; a steady trembling of Buck’s body, a hand fisting into his shirt, a sob, and then tears. 

“I’ve got you,” Eddie whispers gently. He brushes a kiss to the top of Buck’s head. “I’ve got you.”

______

Eddie doesn’t want to let go. 

Buck doesn’t want him to let go.

Eddie shifts until they’re stretched out on the couch, Buck against the back, Eddie on the edge, still curled around him. They need to invest in a new couch if they’re going to keep doing this, but for now, Eddie wraps around Buck and whispers, “I’ve got you,” once more into his hair.

“I know,” Buck says gently. “You always have, Eddie.”

“Just like you’ve always got me.” Eddie knows what a gift that is, to be loved by Buck. Someone who’s had precious little love in his life. Except Maddie. Eddie whispers a private thanks for Maddie in the back of his head. Running his fingers through Buck’s hair, he swipes a thumb over Buck’s cheek, wiping away stray tears. 

Buck nods, sliding a hand up Eddie’s waist, forehead pressing into the crook of Eddie’s neck. “I don’t know where to go from here.”

Eddie doesn’t either. “We’ll find out together.”

“Yeah?” Buck asks, because they both know where they’re headed, but it feels too new to break with definitions or certainties. 

Leaning in, ghosting a kiss over Buck’s lips, his cheek, Eddie nods. “Yeah.”

“Okay,” Buck says, and he reaches up, fingers warm against Eddie’s neck. “Together.”

[riathedreamer]

Zero is Null

A discussion of Zero’s love-hate-relationship with RvB and struggling independence; including a hotdog too big for the bun, tragic backstories, a single bow-chicka-bow-wow, and a cookie at the very end.

Welcome to what will be a lot of text. Basically, it will explore why Zero fails as an RvB (with emphasis on RvB) season. I will not be the first one to bring forth some of the points, and I promise to be fair and civil and fun. This isn’t supposed to be a piece of hate – in fact, I’m writing this because I love Red vs. Blue.

Okay, first of all, to increase your fun – take a guess on just how much of Zero is spent on fight scenes. You see, I’ve calculated the exact amount, and I will reveal it later, but for now, take a guess and remember the number. Maybe you are the winner!

Alright, time to share my thoughts. Wait! Since I suffer from anxiety and have this one annoying voice pretending to be all those critical statements my opinion could be met with, let’s give it an actual voice and address the points throughout this review.

“Why would I care about your opinion, Ria?” – I don’t know, you’re the one who clicked Read More.

“Your opinion doesn’t matter!” – Of course, it doesn’t! Geez. Do you think your opinion matters, though? Listen, we’re on Tumblr, the actual equivalent of screaming into the void. And it’s fun, too!

“If you don’t like it, don’t watch!” - *activates Uno Reverse Card* “You can’t talk about something you haven’t watched!”

“You’re just a Hater” – Actually, this is a point I’ll come back to. Like a cliffhanger. Also, at the end of this, there’ll be a cookie. But this will also include me talking about the stuff I like, because, surprise, Zero is not without talent!

“You just don’t like it because the Reds and Blues aren’t in it!” – Actually, that’s a good point, so instead, this review will start with a sole focus on Zero and discuss the problem that lies within that story. Then we can address why the lack of OG cast is understandable and problematic and weird.

But first! Backstory.

When the first 5 second teaser dropped back in spring (you know, when we were young and innocent and the world didn’t feel like an apocalyptic movie yet), I held onto that one image of what I thought (hoped) to be Grif and Simmons in the sunset, hopefully addressing Grif’s hateglue arc, but boy was I wrong because a) that’s not Simmons, that’s Sarge, and b) the image was from a PSA since the Reds are not in Zero.

Actual face-reveal of me below:

Admittedly, when I heard that the Reds and Blues were not going to be the main characters (or even show up), it felt like a gut punch. However, I actually found myself getting excited due to the creators’ hype. I want to praise them for this. It’s been a while since an RvB season was talked so much ABOUT before its release; it had advertisements, it had creators and voice-actors talking about it. Please. More of that in the future. Their passion rubbed off on me, and that deserves recognition. So it pains me that this was clearly a passion-project, and then when I gave it a try, I didn’t want to touch it again for weeks.

Here’s the thing. I cannot whole-heartedly say that Zero is bad. It’s not gonna melt your eyes. It’s not even so-bad-it’s-good. For me, it’s meh. It’s a Saturday-morning-cartoon aimed for a younger audience with a rushed plot and clichéd characters. The problem is that it calls itself RvB, and with that title comes something to live up to – but more importantly, something to continue.

My main issue is that Zero forces its story into existence by ignoring established content rather than adjusting to it. Let’s call this for the hotdog-too-big-for-the-bun syndrome solely for the sake of the bow-chicka-bow-wow that’s coming now. Bow-chicka-bow-wow. Many of the separate issues I will dive into all add to this hotdog-issue, so I will scream “Hotdog!” whenever this is the case so we can all keep track of my argument.

You can continue the story of Red vs. Blue without the Reds and Blues. While that would personally crush my heart, it can be done. There’s a story of Red vs. Blue that can be continued. The world can be expanded, the previous actions of the Reds and Blues can be explored from another angle.

So.

How does Zero do this? It doesn’t.

I just want to make it clear that new elements can definitely be added when it comes to worldbuilding. That’s literally the point of sequels. But Zero’s settings are presented with so little grace and with no connection to previously established worldbuilding. We get Alliance of Defense and GLASS thrown in our face as very big important organizations – yet we’ve never heard of them before. A big central plot point of RvB is the UNSC and Project Freelancers, and those were introduced naturally with the plot. We already have big established intergalactic organizations. What is AOD’s connection with those? We aren’t told. We are just told they exist and expected to accept it, no questions asked. If this was a whole new world and story – fine. But when you need to build on an already established worldbuilding, you need more grace than this. Chorus was a whole new setting, but it was explained, and it was connected to the previous plot. Same with Iris. Same with Desert Gulch. In Zero, it feels lazy. It feels forced. These organizations are just there because the story is built around them (HOTDOG).

This vagueness when it comes to wordbuilding is also reflected in the settings - we have a desert, a training base, a lab, temples, Tucker’s workplace, and we do not know if all those are set place on the same planet. If that is the case, what is this planet’s relationship with Chorus? Is it Earth? And most importantly, what is the deal with the temples? Why are they connected to Tucker’s sword if it isn’t the same planet. Are they made by the same aliens? Are people okay with this? Why haven’t these temples been explored before? Chorus makes sure to establish this, while Zero doesn’t, adding to a growing amount of confusion.

Okay, so no connection with previous worldbuilding. What about characters? I mean, we got Wash and Carolina and Tucker! So we have RvB characters, it gotta be RvB! Technically – yeah. But it feels dirty. These three characters are not here to be characters. They are here to be props to the new cast. They are not given any development. Their presence isn’t even that important, and if this was a whole new show, they could easily have been replaced with an unknown face. Worst of all, they feel miswritten.

Carolina and Wash are working at a new military organization? Leaving the Reds and Blues behind? To help people? First of all, fucking bad idea, Carolina, the last time you left the Reds and Blues alone, they changed the timeline. But most importantly – Carolina and Wash just joined this new super elite military organization? After being mistreated and manipulated by such an organization in the past?

Carolina is there to introduce the characters. That’s it. We are force-fed their personality by having her literally read out loud their personality. There is no gentle introduction to the new cast. We are not allowed to get to know them naturally. Why show when you can tell, huh? That’s Carolina’s role. That’s why she is there. To introduce the cast and explain their story. That’s it. (HOTDOG).

How about Wash? He is there to get beat up and be a damsel in distress so that the new cast has a reason to explore the plot. Oh, and that brain damage that was the consequence of previous seasons – gone now. The guy who literally has trauma from having an AI explode inside his head is fine with having a computer inserted into it instead. Because that’s needed. To explore his brain damage wouldn’t work now when his role is to be a prop to lure the new cast for one episode and then be put onto the bench for the rest of the runtime (HOTDOG).

And Tucker – he is there to die for a second and have his sword taken from him. That’s literally it. And for the few moments he is there, he feels like old super flirty Tucker, which erases the character development he went through in previous seasons. Okay, so Tucker dies, and then not dies, and then he is put on the bench with Wash where they can sit and talk or whatever (‘cause holy shit, the new cast is not allowed to that), because he isn’t important. The sword is. Tucker is just a prop, even more than his sword is (HOTDOG).

Damn. Wash gets beat up. Tucker gets beat up. Dies. Gets his sword taken away. Almost seems like a Red’s wet dream. Sorry not sorry, Blues, you were done dirty.

So there are miswritten old characters. Even worse is the retconning. The plot needs a “normal” Wash, so, bam, magic computer solution. Never mind Wash’s trauma and character traits. Never mind the logic of the new worldbuilding which also includes a character suffering for years to heal an illness. But the brain damage that was such a big consequence that it became the main part of the plot of the last two seasons – gone. I mean, a gunshot to the head can be healed by CPR. That’s canon. But no one gave Wash CPR so it’s a big thing, okay. It was canonically a big thing, and Zero erased that. This is not me saying that a Cerebral Enhancer couldn’t work in the RvB universe. Imagine it being done right. Wash struggling with the choice of getting used to his disability or accepting the possibility of help - at the cost of reliving his trauma. The struggle between what to choose - what should he choose when he wants to help as many as possible, the sacrifices he thinks he has to make, the way it could have been used as a part of his character growth. But in Zero, the enhancer isn’t a part of Wash’s character. It’s there so the story can work without having to deal with the previous plot’s consequence (HOTDOG).

Same with the sword thing. They sorta explain it by having Tucker flatline, but it’s weak. Honestly, I find it sorta offensive. What about Locus’ sword as well? It’s twisting previous lore to make the new plot work (HOTDOG). (Also, are we not gonna talk about the ultimate power being Spencer Porkensenson’s helmet? Have the writers forgotten Spencer Porkensenson? Have we as a community forgotten Spencer Porkensenson?)

If you have Red vs. Blue in your title, you cannot ignore what you inherit from it. You need to respect the worldbuilding, the established characters, and the previous plot. Zero does not do this.

Let’s talk about the Triplets. No, really, let’s do it. I don’t think I’ve ever talked about them before, because season 14 was a mixed bag for me (that I have now learned to appreciate. Thank you, Zero.) because I have heart at the size of the Grinch and can only love a few characters at a time, and that did not include the Triplets. Can’t even remember their names. Well, I can, but I can’t for the love of me remember which state is which, and my tongue is twisted every time I try to say Ohio, Iowa, and Idaho, and I know it’s on purpose. I know it is. And it got me good. That being said, the fandom actually embraced them really, really well! Seriously, I’ve seen more content for the Triplets than for Zero as a whole.

Why talk about the Triplets? (Was Iowa the lesbian? Or was it Ohio? Fuck.) Because like Zero, they introduced new characters with a story of their own. The Reds and Blues didn’t play a role. But here’s what I feel like the Triplets got right. They didn’t change the settings to force their narrative. They used stuff already established (Project Freelancer), added their own story as a continuation of that. They even included old characters in the beginning (Wash and some other Freelancers) but it felt natural and it didn’t feel like it happened at the expense of the old characters. Wash’s writing felt natural, and his presence wasn’t needed to tell these new character’s stories. He wasn’t a prop to them. He was there to establish the setting and to establish the relationship with these new characters, and then he and the other familiar faces (helmets??) left, and we as the viewers were left with these new characters. And the new characters told their own story by themselves. It felt like, hey, here’s something you know – remember Mother of Invention, and remember Wash’ lower rank, but now, try to imagine being even lower rank than him, aren’t you curious about those fates? Now let’s hear their story! It was new, it was something else, but it didn’t wreck what came before it, and it stayed true to the classic vibes of RvB.

As I said before, the hotdog-issue is my biggest problem with Zero. It infuriates me. I will return to this. But there are more issues, even if we try to look past the title-related problems.

If we try to imagine Zero as its own story and universe (as it should be, in my opinion), it still earns the meh review from me.

These isolated issues include awkwardness, the writing, lack of self-awareness, and pacing. First of all, holy shit, this is a tell, don’t show. Nothing is subtle, nothing is allowed to develop. It’s like the show thinks you are six years old with an attention span of a goldfish. You are not just led by the hand – they have literally pulled off your arm by the end of the show. We are force-fed every bit of information, every bit of personality from these new characters.

The voice-acting is a mixed bag for me. Sometimes it’s pretty good, sometimes it’s not. Some of the problems can definitely be blamed on the dialogue that you can only do so much with. It’s not good. I can’t remember any good jokes (the one joke I really appreciate was the cast on armor, and that was freaking visual humor. That was so RvB. Kudos to that. It was fun. More of that, please.), and RvB is known for having memorably good lines. This is a show built on good, clever, funny dialogue. Zero does not deliver. You have to sit through clichéd lines – “You’re not my dad”, “I trusted you”, “Come with me”, “It can’t be!”, “She’s way too powerful”, and “We have to do this together” – performed unironically. I cringed more than I laughed. Worst thing is that Zero could be a good parody. Sometimes, it feels like it is. One-dimensional characters, a villain wanting ‘the ultimate power’, very overpowered characters, bad one-liners, etc. But Zero takes itself seriously, and I was one of the people rooting for Jax to show up at the end and yell “Cut”. That would have been a funny-as-fuck twist. A spin-off parody. If I can’t have “Sarge the Movie”, I would have taken that and loved it. I would have forgiven everything. “We put so much info into finding that power, but we had no idea what it was” is really a line in the finale, and I cannot believe this is real in a show that somehow still tries to present itself as serious. What a plot.

We have to talk about pacing. God, first of all it should be stated that RvB is a mess when it comes to pacing. I honestly get what they were going for. Sometimes, RvB has come across as a bit boring when you get three episodes stretched over three weeks without much going on. I know season 11 did not have the warmest welcome because it was seen as boring until the finale. But when you see season 11 as a whole, as a movie, as a part of a trilogy, it works so well. Zero is more focused on being episodic. They want something to happen all the time so we will stay tuned. The thing that will happen – a fight. Oh god. The fight scenes.

I have done the math. I have run the numbers. I deserve a freaking cookie for this. Are you ready?

If you put all the episodes together, you have a runtime of 106 minutes. HOWEVER, with the introduction of credits in every episode, you gotta account for this. Removing the credits, this gives us 94 minutes of actual runtime. Out of that, 45 minutes are dedicated to fight scenes. That means 48% of the show is fight scenes.

If I wanted that many fight scenes, I’d watch Death Battle. Except the actual RvB Death Battle episode has a runtime of 20 minutes, and out of that, 5 minutes is dedicated to the actual battle. For the people who hate math – that’s 25% of the actual runtime.

RvB Zero has more fight scenes than a show called Death Battle. Take that in.

The pace suffers from this. Where’s the time to explore the characters? Where’s the time for good dialogue? All I can think of is this:

I get that RvB is a show that’s literally making fun of itself by acknowledging all their characters do is stand around and talk. I get that you want characters to do more than that. But for the love of Church, would it kill the new characters to stand around and talk? For just a minute? Stop fighting, I am begging you, stop fighting! Am I a pacifist now? Am I purple? Have I joined Doc’s team? What has Zero done to me?!

The good thing though is that fight scenes are very good. They’re entertaining. However, they seem to deconstruct themselves when we need to get a fight scene in every episode. Usually, the few fight scenes in an RvB season were in some of the most climatic episodes. In Zero, I can hardly keep up with the pace because they won’t stop moving. Fight scenes aren’t plot. They aren’t character development. You need more than just fight scenes. They entertain, but there’s a limit to that.

Noël Wiggins, the co-writer, stated the inspiration was a Saturday-morning cartoon. They nailed that vibe. If that was their goal, hurray, they have accomplished something! Because of the poor plot and constant fight scenes, it feels like you could just switch on the TV and drop in at any moment and let yourself be entertained by the cool and colorful soldiers punching and kicking each other. I will admit that the fight scenes entertained me. But they don’t make it a good season.

If I were the six-year-old with the attention span of a goldfish that the show believes I am, I honestly would enjoy it. The stiff dialogue and the constant tell-don’t-show makes you feel like an audience that’s not supposed to do anything else but admire the flashy fight scenes. I miss the cleverness of RvB. I miss the characters I get to connect with as I see them grow.

I miss the tone of RvB. Because this isn’t RvB to me.

It’s not that RvB hasn’t changed its tone before. Holy shit, I sorta do want to experience the absolute shock the RvB fandom went through when s6 aired and they were given new characters and serious plot. I would have loved to experience that, but I was too busy being ten years old. The Freelancers seasons also introduced a new tone and more fight scenes with very talented fighters compared to the Blood Gulch gang, but a balance was kept by having half of the season still revolving around the Reds and Blues. But Zero – Zero is so much change. And it’s on purpose. At least this has been made very clear from the beginning.

They constantly seem to appeal to new fans, rather than be directed towards older fans of the show. If you want an entirely new audience with a season with a new cast, new worldbuilding, and new tone, I’m confused as to why they don’t just make a new show. The hotdog-problem begs for this solution. This story and environment and characters feel so out of touch with the original RvB, that with a few rewrites and lack of Halo-armor, it could just be a new show. Problem solved.

If not this, then present it as a spin-off. In all ways, it feels like a spin-off (again, see everything marked HOTDOG). But the creators refuse to do this, and I don’t understand why. I could forgive many of these issues, had they officially separated themselves from canon.

Ah, what’s the idiom? You can’t both swallow and blow? (You can hear the Bow-chicka-bow-wow in the distance). Something about eating cake and having it. Forgive me, English isn’t my native language. POINT IS why are you calling yourself RvB while actively fighting against the core essence of RvB? In my humble opinion, you can’t be both. Marketing it as a spin-off would have granted it some defense when changing, well, literally everything, and I just, would someone please properly describe why it isn’t a spin-off? Isn’t this season marked by its association with the plot of RvB rather than a continuation of it? Zero presenting itself as not a spinoff feels like a toddler clinging to the hem of its mother’s dress while forcefully running away from her, ripping the dress in the process.

When they do connect with the original RvB, it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. When they let Carolina, Wash, and Tucker appear for a moment, it feels like luring viewers in with the RvB title. Look at me. Look at me! I’m not saying this is the case. I say that it gives me the annoying vibes of being lured, rather than letting the characters be a part of the show for their own development, rather than having RvB in the title to continue its story. I should not be getting these vibes at all. But I am.

If you want to use RvB in the title, something from the core of RvB needs to be embraced. Things can be changed. They should. Something new should be brought in. But there’s a limit to how much you can change and replace and twist until it would have been better with an original show. As a season of RvB, it should tell the story of Red vs. Blue.

From my perspective, Zero fails to do so.

It pains me that the old cast has been replaced, but as stated earlier, a season could have worked without them. However, I do not like the take that one should be excited about all the new characters. That it isn’t a big thing that the OG cast got replaced. That we should just deal with it. Just, try to imagine another show suddenly replacing the main characters with characters we’ve never met before. Imagine RWBY suddenly only focusing on a new team of huntresses with the previous main characters reduced to an Easter Egg presence, or Camp Camp suddenly being about a new team of campers, no warning given. Can you imagine the outcry? So maybe let’s agree that a replacement of the main cast is a big thing and should be addressed and it’s valid to be upset about this change.

Could Zero have worked? It’s hard to answer this. How can I accept something as RvB if the season actively pushes away the core of RvB aside for an isolated story that could have been told in any other media? As a spinoff, I could have ignored it. To enjoy Zero, I have to fully separate it from RvB in my mind, and then it’s alright. S’not good. But it’s not bad. It’s entertaining enough. I really ended up liking Raymond and Tiny, and there were a few good jokes, and the fight scenes were admirable (but too much) and I love the creators’ passion. But it’s not RvB. I also wish that the new characters had been attached to previous worldbuilding, for example soldiers on Chorus or agents from Project Freelancer. That way we could build on familiar lore which would have decreased the confusion and added a much needed connection with the previous seasons of RvB.

God, the anxious voice is back (by the way, it sounds like Tutter from “Bear in the Blue House”).

“You’re racist” – I hope not. Literally, I do not want to be. Tell me if I’ve ever crossed some lines, because I swear, that is not my intention, I will apologize and most of all, change and do better. I included this because I’ve seen this take thrown around in the big ugly mess that is the fandom clashes regarding Zero. And racism is problem within RT community (this includes AH and RvB, sorry, I just use RT as an umbrella term for the latter), and I’m not saying it hasn’t been a problem with this season. Writers should never be harassed, and never-fucking-ever because of their skin color, and voice actors shouldn’t be treated like they are responsible for the choices of the show. But I was legit nervous to post this review, and I hope it’s been factual without feeling like personal attacks on the creators because that has never been my intention. I was delighted to hear about the diversity behind this project, and Torrian’s passion legit blew me away because it’s been a while since I’ve seen that for an RvB project. I’d hoped for it to be good, and when I feel disappointed, it’s for the reasons stated in this analysis. That said, Zero is made by a diverse cast and it’s made with love, and both of those things are so, so great, but it does not mean that Zero cannot be criticized. It can, and it should. It’s a product, just like all the other seasons, and fans are allowed to discuss it – both what they loved, and both what they found troublesome. And to repeat previous points, and be respectful, always, fuck racists, and never-fucking-ever harass the staff behind a season, what the fuck is wrong with you if you do this.

“Don’t you get it, it’s different because it’s trying something new!” – Hey, remember the philosophical question: if you replace all the parts of a ship one-by-one, is it still the same ship when you’re done? If it doesn’t include the Reds and Blues, if it ignores previous plot, if the old characters feel miswritten, if it values animation over dialogue, if it values fight scenes over comedy, if it wants to be Fast and Furious instead of Red vs. Blue – is it still Red vs. Blue? Because it doesn’t feel like it to me.

“It's been 17 seasons, it’s time to let the Reds and Blues go so someone else can shine!” – I simply do not understand us having been with the Reds and Blues for 17 seasons should be an argument to let them go, rather than be an argument as to why their absence hurt like hell.

“The Reds and Blues ran out of things to do!” – Did- did they, though? I mean, if we were discussing pretty much any other show, I’d probably agree that they were running out of content. But for the Reds and Blues… I think the PSAs nailed it this year! I’m not kidding, I had more fun watching the Reds and Blues discuss how to do laundry than watching Zero. You could literally give me an hour of the Reds and Blues trying to bake a cake or clear a gutter or simply settling down with an ordinary life, and I would trust them to make it worth the watch.

“The flaws were due to the fact it’s only 8 episodes long!” – Look, I can only judge a product the way it’s presented to me. I cannot come up with excuses for it. If they had 8 episodes to work with, they need to come up with a plot that works with this runtime. Seriously, this excuse cannot work when 48% of the season is spent on fight scenes. They could have used more runtime, sure, but the show needs to be able to pace itself and be planned accordingly.

“The OG cast couldn’t be a part of this year, hence Zero!” – That might be true. But. Would one year without RvB kill it? Is Zero necessary? Again, I just can’t judge excuses for the show. But trouble with the cast has been an issue before. Season 15 solves Geoff’s sabbatical by actually making Grif’s absence a part of the plot. Zero’s lack of Reds and Blues just feels like this excuse to tell a story that needn’t be a part of RvB.

Am I a hater? I guess? I greatly dislike Zero for the critique stated above. I do, however, not harass the creators and no one should ever do that. However, I have to admit that I feel there’s been this weird rejection of any critique of Zero where everything’s been brushed off as haters gonna hate, including the critique stated above. And I think that’s a problem because critique, as hard as it can be to hear (and I know this. I’m an author of original works. Weird flex, I know), is valid and necessary and shouldn’t just be shrugged away. As always, both sides of the fandom should always be respectful, but my own opinion is that addressing the flaws of Zero should not be controversial.

Does this super long rant/critique/whatever mean you cannot enjoy Zero? Gods no! I almost envy you if you enjoy this season, but holy shit, feel free to love it and tell the creators that you love it! Me pointing out the issues I have with the season shouldn’t be stopping you. I loved (and still love) s15 when it came out, and it was majorly rejected by the fandom. There were many, many critical posts, people were going on about how RvB should have ended with s13, and it evolved into the writer receiving death threats (me, once again: never ever harass the creators, assholes). But I didn’t tell people to stop being negative. I actually agreed with many of the flaws that were pointed out, and I enjoyed the season despite this, because that is possible. We, as RvB fans, should agree that RvB, is... I mean, it’s not the greatest, most flawless of shows, but we love it nonetheless. So go ahead and love Zero. This is not a stop sign. This is my opinion that you chose to read.

Wait, I promised you a cookie, didn’t I? Well, you’re not getting one. Why? Because I’m a Red and this is my chance to piss off a Blue. As Caboose wisely said: “Well, at least I don't go around... knocking on people's non-doors... and promising them cookies... and then NOT. GIVING. THEM. COOKIES!”

Blue Team sucks.

End speech.

[kantrips]

Alistair & Celia Headcanon Collection

Some Amell x Alistair (largely fluff) headcanons! Includes some from Origins, Warden time at Amaranthine and the Inquisition-era. Some of these I have had since my first playthrough, but others I may have read elsewhere, loved and thusly absorbed so please let me know if I can link anyone!

Origins

The first time they meet at Ostagar, Celia thinks Alistair is the most fascinating person she has ever encountered because no one in the Circle had a particularly boisterous sense of humour. Alistair is oblivious to her heart eyes, and also holds back because he’s worried she won’t survive the Joining.

Even after the Joining, Alistair tries very hard not to ~feel feelings~ despite the clear signals Celia is hurling at him because he assumes she won’t like him once she gets to know him more/she will get bored of him/ she will leave like everyone else i.e. the boy is hecking damaged.

Celia laughs obnoxiously hard at all Alistair’s jokes because a) she finds them unexpected, and b) because, like a dork, she wants to prove she gets the punch line. Alistair is perplexed by her reactions at first, and cautiously wonders if she is mocking him. Once he realises she is genuinely amused, it bolsters his ego significantly. 

Celia has no concept of personal space and sits and walks very close to everyone. There wasn’t a lot of room at the Circle so she forgets she can spread out. Morrigan makes it clear she needs to back off (Celia doesn’t need telling twice) but Alistair is more relaxed and gets used to it quickly after the confusion of the first night when she blithely sets up her bedroll right next to his. Alistair assumes she is a bit scared of sleeping in the forest but really she is just accustomed to the need to cram as many apprentice bunks into a room as possible.

In a way, Alistair is also used to sharing small spaces (Chantry and Wardens) so it doesn’t bother him at all when Celia chooses to sit pressed against his side, walks so their arms bump together, or unconsciously brushes an eyelash from his cheek. He quickly grows to like her overfamiliarity (for some reason…).

Similarly, Alistair eats Celia’s leftover food if she can’t finish it or doesn’t like it, even before they’re a couple. She just offers one day and after that it becomes a given. The others side-eye them but they are happily oblivious.   

Celia gets in trouble from the rest of the party for getting distracted yelling encouragement and cheering Alistair during combat. In turn, Alistair gets in trouble for turning around mid-battle to thank her when she buffs or heals him. Morrigan advises that if they are both so determined to get killed, she is more than happy to assist with hastening the process.

Celia’s mabari, Trevor, is quickly accepting of Alistair and his proximity to Celia because he observes Alistair protecting Celia in battle and thusly deems him to be a ‘good dog’ and considers that they are equals in the pack.

Alistair and Celia vandalise each other’s wanted posters whenever they come across them. It gets competitive.

Celia doesn’t really want to be in charge of saving the world but has three things working in her favour: 1) she absolutely hates letting people down 2) has an intense need to finish what she starts 3) she is in possession of a bossy streak.

That said she spends the entire Blight screaming internally to an extent not even Alistair fully grasps.

They go to the Circle Tower first, because Celia thinks she will have the best chance of getting help from people she knows and is also ‘homesick’ in the sense that she is very glad to be free of the place, but stressed enough with everything going on to crave something familiar even if she resents it. The events there devastate her. Along with the loss of friends and mentors she has known since childhood, being trapped by herself in the fade particularly terrifies her as she has never truly been alone for so long before in her life. It reminds her of the Harowing which totally blindsided her. She is very teary, untalkative and introspective for some time afterwards, but both Trevor and Alistair have the correct instinct to stay close without trying to interact with her which she finds incredibly comforting.

Accustomed to making potions, Celia will not under any circumstances deviate from a recipe while cooking, whereas Alistair just chucks everything in to use up leftovers and see what happens. Alistair gets meals together super quickly whereas Celia takes forever. A little unfairly, Celia is perceived as the better cook because she produces very consistent meals, while Alistair’s experiments sometimes do work, and sometimes don’t, with people tending to focus on the disasters rather than the successes. Meanwhile Celia is rather: “should I add half a sprig of rosemary? No I mustn’t: it would be far too daring!” so everyone learns to tip their own seasonings into their bowl before even tasting her food.

When they’re travelling and walking for days on end, Alistair and Celia make up a lot of games in the vein of ‘I spy’ and ‘would you rather?’ They can occasionally persuade others to participate though no one enjoys them or gets quite as invested as Celia and Alistair (who are actual children).

A game stops abruptly one day when Celia guilelessly asks if Alistair would rather be Emperor of Orlais or King of Fereldan and he gets extremely defensive and answers, “Neither.” Having no context for this reaction (yet), Celia (a stickler for the rules) pushes him, insisting his answer isn’t allowed and that he’s cheating until Alistair gets grouchy, stomps off and refuses to play anything for days. 

Celia figures he must be overtired, but his unhappy reaction does come back to her later at the Landsmeet and contributes to her already firm resolve not to put him on the throne.

When bored, Alistair also periodically asks Celia to, “Do a trick!” with her magic and she usually obliges with something small and silly which Wynne always scolds them for (but they continue to do anyway).

Celia does not like Eamon one bit and makes it clear from their first meeting. Alistair actually gets a bit annoyed at her because she is polite to 99% of the other people they meet and he can’t understand what her problem is. Celia won’t say because she doesn’t want to drive Alistair away so she remains coldly civil towards Eamon and commences a long, looong process of nudging Alistair towards having the realisation himself that a) Eamon is manipulative, selfish and cruel and b) Alistair deserves better.

Celia wants to collect some of the books they find which is not practical given they are constantly travelling, but Alistair carries as many as he can in his pack and suffers in silence for it, ultimately finding it worth it for her enthusiastic gratitude.

Celia cuts Alistair’s hair and does a very respectable job after weeks of him complaining it’s flopping in his eyes (they used to cut each other’s hair in the Circle). Zevran pretends she did an awful job, gasping in horror at Alistair’s appearance, much to Celia’s ire. Alistair (internally weeping) tries to be brave until he can check his reflection in some plate mail and see it is fine.

Celia is very naïve about how the ‘real world’ works having been at the Circle since she was a child. This is especially evident in Denerim and Alistair has to explain how money works and grab her before she wanders down dicey looking alleyways.

Alistair nearly dissolves into a paroxysm of agony when he points out his favourite type of cheese at the Denerim Markets and (accustomed to the very limited range of bland foods provided at the Circle) Celia innocently asks, “There is more than one type of cheese?” Alistair makes it his mission to educate her. She doesn’t like most of what he feeds her but doesn’t say so to protect his feelings given he seems to take the matter so incredibly personally.

Leliana convinces Celia to sing one evening at the campfire. She’s breathy with a very limited range but manages okay, and Leliana plays and harmonises in support. Watching on with a goofy smile plastered over his face, Alistair comments to the surrounding companions about how talented she is and they’re like “…she’s really not mate.”

When they both wake up from a blightmare (or Celia has one and wakes Alistair with her flailing) they sneak about and eat anything they can find then sit up and have massive deep & meaningfuls (i.e. in the spirit of going for a long drive with a friend or being in the garden with someone outside a party and spilling your guts). Eventually they start blaming the depleted food stores on Leliana’s nug, Schmooples, much to Leliana’s displeasure.

Given Celia usually responds so well to his jokes, Alistair gets a bit peeved when Celia starts replying to some of his more severely self-deprecating humour with an unamused, “No you’re not,” or, “That’s not true.” He defensively argues it’s just a joke, but he does stop doing it so much as time goes on.

Celia is SO excited when Alistair gives her the rose. She never in her life thought she would be the recipient of a proper ~romantic gesture~…however she accidentally sits on the rose about five minutes after she gets it. Celia is devastated. There is a lot of panic and tears and she keeps one petal pressed in a book but has to unceremoniously ditch the rest in secret.

Celia doesn’t tell Alistair about this until years later and she’s terrified he’ll be hurt but he just laughs because he was so worried he was going to be the one to squash it and then she destroyed it basically the minute she got it. Alistair acknowledges it was an impractical gift given their situation. Celia gets mad and says it was a PERFECT gift and is annoyed at how funny he finds it given this has been a crushing, guilty secret hanging over her for years.

Following this, every time Alistair gives her any kind of gift, he can’t help but throw in a ‘Don’t sit on it!” and cracks himself up, especially when Celia gets grumpy about it and accuses him of spoiling the moment. It happens so often that when Alistair chooses a horse for her and plans to teach her to ride, Celia manages to cut him off with, “Yes, I know Alistair: I can sit on this one,” and steals his thunder.

Alistair periodically says Celia’s name just to check if she’ll answer, especially after a long period of quiet or to see if she’s awake à la screaming in the chantry because it’s so silent. When she responds he says, “Nothing” or “Never mind” but he finds it vaguely comforting just to hear her reply and it’s a habit he never loses, even when they have been together for years and he is much less isolated generally. Alistair doesn’t realise he’s doing it, and it never happens frequently enough for Celia to notice: she just assumes he has lost his train of thought.

They sometimes conspire to purposely fall to the back of the group while on the road so that they can hold hands. Everyone knows full well what they are doing, but Alistair and Celia think they are being incredibly ~sneaky~.

The first time they sleep together they laugh. A lot. Before, during and after.

Alistair snores loudly but only when he’s on his back. Celia is used to the noise of people sleeping around her at the Circle so it doesn’t bother her and she doesn’t want to disturb him because she knows he needs the rest.

When they are known to be sharing a tent however, their companions will slap on the walls of it and demand she kick him until he stops snoring. Celia will relent and gently prod and nudge Alistair until he rolls over with a bit of sleepy grumbling.

I think everyone has this headcanon to the point it is basically actual canon HOWEVER I am legally obligated to include it: Alistair is a professional body heat distributor and Celia drastically cuts down on the number of blankets she uses once they are sleeping together. If she stands in front of him on cold days, he understands the non-verbal signal and will automatically wrap her in his cloak.

Also might as well be canon: Alistair likes to be the little spoon. He doesn’t say, but Celia knows.

Decidedly not a fluff one (you can skip to Amaranthine to avoid) but the ritual with Morrigan fairly significantly messes Alistair up (both the act itself and his consideration of the repercussions i.e. Kieran). He’s jubilant and relieved at their victory over the Archdemon, but in the background struggles to process and there is some fallout once the victory celebrations lull and he has time to fully register what happened. Alistair grapples with a lot of guilt, disgust and confusion. He doesn’t know how to express it or where to direct his emotions so it mainly manifests as self-loathing. He wants to talk to Celia about it but can’t articulate his feelings which makes him feel worse.

Celia tries to comfort him, but he needs space on and off for a long while after and she gives him it. She feels a lot of guilt too, and never stops wondering how much it was actually his choice to do the ritual, worrying that she made him feel like he had to do it. Eventually they discuss it openly and honestly, which eases both of their minds somewhat, but it takes a long time to get to a point where they can talk on the subject. Meeting Kieran at Skyhold also helps Alistair down the line, though it’s obviously painful.

Amaranthine & Inquisition

Alistair keeps an eye out for people struggling, especially new recruits who are having trouble fitting in. He takes them under his wing and is very good at building people up and making sure everyone is included. He’ll just start enthusiastically greeting people like they are his best friend and squeezing himself onto the bench next to them at meals until everyone else follows suit.

For recruits that don’t respond well to his ‘mother hen’ type attention, Celia is good at assigning tasks that specifically highlight their strengths and builds their confidence/sense of purpose which also gains them the respect of their peers.

Alistair has been known to stand behind Celia while she is giving mundane orders/making speeches and pull faces or impersonate her, turning stony and impassive when she spins around accusingly because people are laughing.  

But if anyone else talks smack about her he gets very, “Sorry mate, just to clarify was that comment directed at my wife, your Commander, the hERO OF FERELDAN, VANQUISHER OF AN ARCHDEMON!? That’s lucky, I didn’t THINK IT LIKELY. Because that wouldn’t be WISE, would it now?” etc. with some loud, fake laughter and firm backslapping for the worst offenders.

The plan for them to part ways so that Celia can search for a cure goes very badly, especially because Celia (under a lot of stress and not coping™) eventually devolves into, “I’m in charge and I say so,” which is a big betrayal of their agreements both to stay together, and make decisions together on equal footing. She realises this and takes it back but Alistair is demoralised and gives in with a bit of petty, sarcastic reverence e.g. saluting and, “Whatever you say boss, don’t know why I dared to utter an opinion how foolish of me...” so they still part on slightly strained terms, even after later mutually apologising and trying to make the most of their time together before they go.

Both regret the argument during their separation and write horribly soppy letters to each other, but something still feels uncomfortably unresolved until they are together again. They pine. So much. It’s disgusting and cliched. There is considerable sighing and staring at the moon or deep into tankards, very much to the ire of those around them. Alistair can be particularly annoying: “This roll reminds me of my wife...she eats bread sometimes...”

After Celia sends the letter to the Inquisitor, she writes to Leliana directly along the lines of, “I know it was incredibly subtle but I wanted to check: did they get the message? That I will destroy them if Alistair gets hurt?” and Leliana replies in the vein of, “Hon, it wasn’t even remotely subtle ffs…”

When reunited, though ecstatic and nearly delirious with joy and relief, it takes a while to rebuild the trust they once had, especially for Alistair. There’s an unfamiliar awkwardness that flares up unexpectedly, but it doesn’t last and they’re both fully committed to each other and to staying together permanently this time.

Celia and Alistair have a conversation recapping everything that happened while they were apart in which Celia is all, “Poor Hawke. Honestly I’m shocked you didn’t do something obscenely idiotic like try and sacrifice yourself thank the Maker for that…” and Alistair is there, nervously sweating, looking for an exit, loosening his collar etc.

As they settle back into their old routines Alistair will occasionally blurt out things like, “I really like having breakfast with you,” and then berate himself internally for how trite that sounds but Celia replies on cue, “I love waking up next to you and the way you groan when you stretch your back out and the way you check your hair twice before you leave the room and the way you complain if I don’t eat my crusts and the way you still hold my hand when we’re walking...” and basically they’re just blissfully happy being comfortably domestic and even as they get older they are forever just teenagers in love.

The Wardens at Amaranthine acquire/receive a griffon egg and the hatchling imprints on Alistair and decides he is their mother. It can’t cope with separation, crying constantly if Alistair goes out of sight, and won’t let anyone else feed or handle it so Alistair carries them in a sling 24/7. He gets to give orders and run training sessions with the tiny griffon occasionally poking its head out just to glare at everyone.

Whenever the baby griffon squeaks, Alistair automatically replies, “Well said,” or “Excellent point, Ser Beaksly” with a totally straight face.

For the first few months, Celia gets nipped or scratched if she approaches Alistair unless he wraps the griffon up. It so badly wants to fight her. Celia is permitted to sleep in her own bed, as long as the griffon sleeps curled on Alistair’s chest and Celia doesn't try anything outrageous like touching her husband even fleetingly. It gets a little frustrating as the months drag on, but the image of Alistair with the sling over his armour, or with the griffon snuggling possessively around his neck staring daggers at everyone, is so entertaining that Celia can’t get truly annoyed about it. As the griffon gets older it does learn to tolerate other people and becomes more independent but remains very protective of Alistair and favours him above all others. Insert the ‘Ah yes. Me. My husband. And his thousand pound murder-bird-cat child’ meme here.

Modern AU Bonus Round

They share headphones while commuting.

They occasionally end up wearing sort of matching outfits, mostly unintentionally.

They consistently refer to their dog, Trevor, as their son to the point that people who aren’t familiar with them assume that they actually have a child.

[mochegato]

Hope on Board

Chapter 4 – Acing the Test by Not Preparing Properly    

Chapter 1     Chapter 3

“Are you under the impression the third test might give you a different result?” Adrien asked with a strained amusement.

“We’ve seen stranger things,” Marinette spared a glance from the test on the counter in front of her to glare at him.  “And if I was in any way lucky,” this time she glared at Tikki who shrunk away behind Adrien while Plagg cackled at her, “it would.”

She returned her attention to the test only to give an aggravated yell.  “Son of a bitch!”  She grabbed the edge of the bathroom counter to support her as she folded over gasping for breath.

Adrien nodded thoughtfully. “It might be.”

She turned her head to glare at him.  “Are you kidding me!  Really?” He gave her a sheepish shrug even as he grimaced.  She groaned and collapsed on the floor, leaning against the wall and pulling her knees into her chest.  The distant thought occurred to her that she wasn’t going to be able to do that for much longer.  She wasn’t going to be able to do a lot of things for much longer.  God, how could she be so stupid.  She pulled her hair in frustration.

She was just starting up her business.  She had just entered into a partnership that was supposed to last at least two years. How was she going to manage the project if she was throwing up and had to take months off to take care of the baby? What if there were complications? How was she going to take care of the baby?  How was she going to support a baby if her business failed?  But how was her business going to succeed if she was focusing on making sure her baby had the attention they deserved.

She was broken from her spiraling thoughts by a weight across her shoulders.  She turned her head, still letting it rest on her knees, to look at Adrien.  He reached over to wipe away the tears she only then realized she had been crying. “It’ll be okay, Bugaboo.  There are options if you don’t want the baby and if you do, there are options.”

She gave him a weak smile, keeping her head on her knees for a few more moments before switching to lay her head on his shoulder.  “How am I supposed to get my company up and running and raise a baby on my own?  It takes so much time, both of them.  I’m half a world away from my family and most of our friends, fresh out of school, starting a business, entering a new partnership, which might get reneged if I can’t fulfill the requirements, and all alone. How do I do this?”

Adrien hugged her closer. “You’re not alone, Princess.  I’ll be right by you every step of the way. Even when you tell your parents.”

She gave a halfhearted laugh. “Yeah, that’s going to be a bloodbath.”

Adrien rested his head on hers.  “No it won’t. Do you have any idea how excited your Dad is going to be about being a grandfather?  They’re going to be worried about you.  They’ll have the same concerns for you that you do.  They won’t be mad.”

“The father might be,” she hedged.

Adrien was silent for a moment.  “You’re going to tell him?”

“I think he deserves to know. This baby might have a loving family nearby.  I don’t want to take that away if it is available.”  Her voice was starting to get stronger.  This was a decision she could control.  She could control whether she invited the father to be a part of their lives.  She couldn’t control his answer, but she could control the ask.

“You’re not worried about the weapons?” Adrien asked carefully.

“I am.  But Tikki is right, it could be an innocent explanation. I owe it to him to have the chance to explain.”

Adrien nodded, determination settling in his eyes.  “Okay, we tell him.”

“We?” she asked with an amused smile.

“We,” he confirmed.  “I said you weren’t going to do this alone. I meant it.  I’ll be there to support you.  I’ll help you find him and stay nearby when you tell him, if you want me to.”  He squeezed her again.  “So, what do you remember about where he lives?”

“It had a kitchen with weapons, a living room with a comfortable couch, and a bedroom with a bed that didn’t squeak,” she deadpanned.

He shot her a playful glare. “You can’t remember anything?”

“I remember… it was a door in the middle of a long corridor of doors on a floor a few floors up in a building in Gotham.”

“Oh that’s helpful.”

“I don’t know!” She threw her hands up in exasperation.  “I was still drunk and panicked and swung away as Ladybug so I don’t even have stores I passed to go off of.”

“What do you remember, for real this time?”

She turned to stare at a point in the distance, trying to focus her mind and order her thoughts. What did she remember?  Not much.  She had flashes.  She remembered the feelings he stirred in her.  She smiled nostalgically as she described her memories.  “A smile, a touch, his eyes looking soft and sweet. The feeling of being watched out for, of being wanted, more than just physically.”

Adrien gave a long suffering sigh and collapsed his legs to the bathroom floor.  “Well that’s helpful to track him down.”

Marinette rolled her eyes and pushed him away.  “You asked what I remembered.  I didn’t even remember his name on my own.”  She groaned and hit her head against the wall behind her.  “Why did you let me go home with him?  You were supposed to be my voice of reason!”

“You said you were sure. You said it was cosmic intervention… I think.”  He rubbed his head as phantom pains returned.  “You remember more about that night than I do.”

She groaned again, this one taking a whinier tone than the previous groans.  “That was the sixth drink and eighth shot talking.”

“Well your eighth shot was very convincing to my ninth shot.”

“And how could I have not used a condom?  I couldn’t possibly have been that far gone that I didn’t demand protection.  Could he…” her body stilled, her mind froze as a horrifying thought occurred to her, “…could he have not used one?  And said he did?”

Adrien grimaced.  “Or he was drunk and thought he did.  Or thought you said not to.  Not that you did!  Just that he was really drunk and misinterpreted!” He rushed to add upon seeing her reaction to the suggestion.

“No, you used a condom,” Tikki offered quietly.  “Just not the whole time.”

Marinette’s head whipped to her.  “Okay, first, ew!  Why do you know that!  Were you watching?”

“No!” Tikki exclaimed indignantly.  “But voices carry, especially when they are very loud.” She gave Marinette a pointed look.

Marinette eyed her suspiciously but continued, “Second, what does that mean?”

Tikki sighed dejectedly. “It means you did stuff before you put it on.  And if you’re particularly lucky, that’s enough.”

“Oh my God,” Adrien muttered absentmindedly.

“Oh my God!” Marinette yelled, realization setting in.

“Yeah, I bet Tikki heard that a lot that night too,” Plagg cackled.

All three eyes shot to him in a glare that did nothing to diminish his laughter.

“You mean I’m pregnant because I’m Ladybug?  Because I was wearing the earrings?” Marinette whisper screeched.

“Not… entirely… but, it influenced it.  You’re the wielder of Creation.  It’s going to increase your chances of the right things happening in the right order to create life.  But you two are the ones who didn’t wear a condom for the whole act, allowing semen to be present and you two are the ones who gave each other multiple orgasms, which helped move the semen into the right position.  You very much could have gotten pregnant without any miraculous intervention.”

Marinette’s mouth hung open and her cheeks flushed in embarrassment.  “Multiple orgasms, huh?” Adrien asked waggling his eyebrows.

“Judging by the screaming, I’d say both of them were highly proficient,” Tikki nodded in confirmation.

“Oh my God,” Marinette whispered into her hands covering her face.  “This is a nightmare.  Not only am I pregnant, I have to hear this.  I cannot get a break.”

Adrien shrugged.  “It could be worse.  It could have been bad.”

“It doesn’t really matter if I couldn’t remember it,” Marinette pointed out.

“Yeah, but next time you’ll remember it,” he pointed out.

“If there is a next time,” Marinette sighed.

“There will be,” Adrien reassured her.  “It was cosmic intervention.  It will bring you back together again.”

Marinette shook her head and rested it on his shoulder with her eyes closed.  “I wish I was as optimistic as you.”

“It will all work out eventually.  Until then, you have commissions to finish before the gala, including your dress. You need to look impeccable so we can network for your company.”

Marinette groaned and dropped her legs to the ground.  “Can’t I just fall apart for one minute, please?”

“Nope.  You need to get back to work doing something you love and can focus on.  If it happens to be something that calms you as well?  Well that’s just good for you and the baby.  Come on,” he stood up and offered her his hand to help her up, “you start working and I’ll go out and get some pregnancy supplies for you.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “I think you’re more excited about this than I am.”

“You’re going to have a baby! You have a little bug in the oven! If you don’t break it to your dad with a pun, he and I will be so disappointed,” he gave her a mock stern look before pulling her into a comforting embrace.  “You’re going to be ecstatic about this, too, once the shock wears off.  I know you and I know you’re going to be an amazing mom,” he whispered with a kiss to the top of her head.  “And I’m going to be the fun uncle that he, she, or they gets really excited to hang out with and takes them for ice cream and he comes to whenever she has problems they can’t go to you about.” He gave her an excited smile as he thought about the future.

“Now move.  The gala’s coming up in just a few weeks and you have a ton of work to finish and you’re going to be panicking about letting Tim down and you’re not going to be able to chug coffee and energy drinks anymore.”  

Marinette emitted a woeful, agonized moan that even the neighbors heard.

Chapter 5

Tags:

@dickinette-february @demonicbusiness

[nbrook29]

101, 104 and 110 for the dialogue prompts 🖤

Hello!

101. “I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

104. “You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”

The 110 one is not included here, but I also got it from someone else so it's gonna be filled later :)

* * *

Robbe hears the doorbell coming from downstairs, but he stays put, knowing his mom is in the kitchen so she’ll open the door while he adds two last sentences to his final history essay. He’s clicking ‘save’ when there’s a knock on his door, and without waiting for a response, Sander’s smiling face pops from behind it.

“I didn’t say you could come in,” Robbe grins at him cheekily, standing up from his swivel chair for the first time in hours. He immediately pulls Sander into his bedroom, looping his arms around his neck as the boy kicks the door closed behind him, licking into Robbe’s mouth in no time.

He feels a light slap on his butt as a response to his words, and then Sander disentangles himself from him to flop dramatically on the bed, a groan leaving his mouth.

“I’ve just participated in the dullest lecture known to humanity,” he complains, pouting at Robbe. “I need you to entertain me or I’mma die of boredom tonight.”

Sander’s pleading eyes make him snort, but he grabs his laptop and joins him on his bed, rearranging the pillows to make it more comfortable for them to sit straight.

“Okay, drama queen, what do you wanna watch?”

“I get to choose tonight?” Sander’s face lights up with excitement and it’s adorable how little it takes to make him look like that. When Robbe nods, amused, he gets a kiss on his shoulder as a thank you before Sander turns his attention to the screen where Robbe started the endless scrolling on Netflix.

He’s a picky viewer so eventually Robbe leaves him with his computer and goes to the kitchen to make them popcorn and grab some chips. It’s where he’s confronted by his mom who catches him midwalk back to the bedroom to gently remind him that she’s staying home tonight and not going out and that please take that into account, honey. And then she shoots him a wink and now it’s Robbe who’s going to die.

Of shame.

Beet red and mortified, Robbe enters his room and at Sander’s questioning look he tells him his mom basically requested them to keep quiet this time. Unsurprisingly, Sander is unaffected, grinning at Robbe like it’s funny.

“It’s all your fault, by the way,” Robbe accuses him, thinking back to last Friday night.

“You’re right, I’m so sorry I’m so good in bed you can’t contain the noise you ma-”

He doesn’t manage to finish his sentence, cut off by the popcorn Robbe throws at him.

“Who’s being a drama queen now?!”

“My mom heard us, Sander, do you understand how embarrassing that is?!”

Sander rolls his eyes and pulls at his sleeve to make him sit back on the bed, careful not to spill the bowl full of popcorn.

Once he has him where he wants him, sulky eyes on him, he frames his face with his hands and says placatingly, “This isn’t a big deal, Robbe.”

Robbe looks very unconvinced so Sander leans in to catch his frowning lips in a kiss to ease his worries.

Then he claps his hands, nodding at the screen. “Look, I chose a movie for us?”

Robbe turns around reluctantly to check it out and cocks his brow when he sees the newest horror that everybody’s been talking about.

“You really want to watch this?”

“You don’t?”

“No, I do, I love horror movies, but knowing you I thought you’re gonna choose some psychological drama.”

Sander shrugs. “I wanna see what the hype is all about.”

It’s a surprising turn of events, but Robbe is not going to question it any longer because he really wants to see that movie. They turn the lights off and get comfortable on the bed, sitting upright for the time being to avoid choking on the popcorn. But Robbe is not capable of having Sander in his bed right next to him and not having any type of body contact so he innocently swings his leg on his lap, scooching a little closer, a small smile blooming on his face when Sander doesn’t even question it, just starts drawing random patterns on his sweatpants-clad thigh.

An hour into the movie and Robbe is having so much fun because it’s just the right amount of scary combined with some weird psycho shit and frankly, that’s his all time favorite combination. He’s been feeding Sander chips for the last ten minutes, his arm absent-mindedly traveling between the bowl and his boyfriend’s mouth as he himself has been completely engrossed into the movie, eyes wide and jaw dropped, not paying much attention to his surroundings.

It’s why he doesn’t notice the slow but steady attempts of Sander’s to merge his body into Robbe’s. It’s only when he turns to him to comment on the latest jump scare he realizes half of Sander’s face is hidden in Robbe’s left sleeve, eyes wide and scared as they peek reluctantly at the screen.

“Sander?”

“Yeah?” he squeaks out.

“Are you scared?”

“No.”

That earns him a doubtful look, and Sander had to realize he’s not very convincing at the moment because his shoulders drop, the defensive look on his face replaced with resignation.

“I have a confession to make,” he takes a deep breath as if he was about to drop a bomb on Robbe. “Horror movies terrify me.”

Robbe blinks at him in confusion. “But you were the one who chose this one for us to watch.”

“I thought I got over it. I was wrong. I was so wrong.”

It’s not that funny. Really, it isn’t. But there’s something about the face Sander is making that pulls an involuntary giggle out of him.

His boyfriend’s not very happy about that.

“Shut up, you weren’t supposed to laugh!” he whines at him, accusation in his voice, and his cheeks couldn’t be redder if they tried, Robbe notices as Sander hides them in his hands. “I’m so embarrassed.”

“I’m sorry!” he pauses the movie and turns fully to him. “I’m not laughing at you, I swear. It’s actually kinda adorable,” Robbe adds in a soothing tone, trying to remedy the situation, but Sander’s not very happy about that particular comparison.

“Great, now I’m adorable, that’s so much better,” he mutters grumpily, and then he ostensibly leans away from the kiss Robbe’s about to place on his cheek in order to pacify him.

“Seriously?”

His question is met with silence as Sander keeps being stubborn, still offended.

“Play the stupid movie.”

“Are you su-”

“Yes!”

Robbe has to bite his lip to keep from laughing again, knowing it wouldn’t be well received. He’s not exactly worried about Sander being mad at him right now because he’s well aware of having a couple of tricks up his sleeve to smooth his ruffled feathers. For now, he resorts to pressing “play” and trying not to coo at Sander’s pouty face.

The movie only gets scarier and more twisted since then onwards. For Robbe, it’s top entertainment, but when he glances surreptitiously at Sander’s face it’s ghost-white, and something tells him it’s not only because of the light from the screen. And it’s not like Robbe actually enjoys seeing his boyfriend suffer.

“Are you alright?” he asks softly, hand reaching to rub his thigh in what he hopes is a comforting touch.

“Yes, I’m okay, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

Okay, still mad then.

Robbe keeps his hand where he put it and counts it as a win when Sander doesn’t swat it away.

They get to hour and 40 minutes, an hour of the movie still ahead of them when Sander reaches his breaking point.

“Fuck, I don’t care anymore, call me a wuss or whatever, but please turn it off, I’m done,” he groans, a pained expression on his face as he brings his legs in and hugs his knees, looking like a little boy and breaking Robbe’s heart a little.

He shuts the computer right away, his bedroom swamped in darkness as a result, only the moonlight creeping in through the big window making it possible for him to see Sander’s pale face. He gathers him into his arms, grateful he’s not putting up a fight and instead eagerly letting Robbe hold him.

“Do you honestly think I’m gonna call you a wuss? Especially in not, like, a teasing way?”

The shrug he gets as a response is miniscule, but it’s there.

He sighs, nosing along Sander’s hairline and pressing a kiss to his forehead which makes Sander cuddle even more into him. Robbe takes that as a sign of forgiveness for his previous unfortunate laughter.

"I kinda know you wouldn't, but... I want you to think I'm, you know, cool and stuff," comes a small voice from under Robbe's jaw.

Awwww.

"But I will always think you're cool and stuff."

"Yeah?" Sander blinks at him with his insecure eyes.

"Yeah."

He places his head back in the nook of Robbe's neck, nuzzling in like a cat.

"Okay."

"Okay."

They're silent for a few seconds before Robbe speaks again.

"Can I kiss you now?"

"Yes, I'll allow it."

Robbe snorts, fingers tangling in the brown strands as he angles Sander's head for a proper kiss and once he's done with him, his cheeks look much more human-like, blood flowing back to his face.

"Wanna watch stupid TikTok videos for a change?"

Sander nods against his chest, a smile on his lips now.

His arm tightens around Robbe's waist as he says, "I hope you're aware I'm sleeping here tonight cause there's no way in hell I'm gonna be alone in bed after this shit."

[amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines]

Riverdale//what are friends for?

Request: Riverdale imagine the reader has an older brother who is a northsider to his core and wants his sister to date his friend but she knows his true colors and it won't do well and the reader hates her older brother and the core 4 watch what happens and stuff and the reader tells them about the hardships at home and w/ her brother who she's afraid of.

hey! so trigger warning: men being verbally abusive and just plain rude. please don’t read if this will upset or trigger you. the last thing i want for you is to be sad. other than that, i really hope you like this! 

You feel like you can finally breathe again when the bell rings above your head. After an excruciating 7 minutes and 32 seconds of being stuck in a car with the older brother from hell, the two of you can finally go your separate ways and pretend the other doesn’t exist for a few hours. 

And even though you know that in three hours you’ll have to get back in the car and suffer through another 7 minutes and 32 seconds until you can go to your room under the pretences of doing homework/studying, the anxiety still picks away at you. It still remains, it’s just buried under the excitement at seeing your friends. 

It’s not like Oscar is the devil incarnate, he’s just the devil’s second in command. He some sort of Northside monster, a mascot for all things privilege and pettiness stuffed inside a rich boy suit. 

He insults and teases and makes fun of anyone he deems lesser than him, which is basically anyone...including the people he calls his friends. Really they’re just people he hangs around with to boost his ego and make him feel better about whatever is going on inside his own head. 

Oscar practically shoves past you as soon as you step foot in the diner, a bright smile already lighting up his expression when he see’s the majority of his friends sitting in the corner, and you’re left standing by the door searching for your own friends. 

To your misfortune, it seems like you’re the first one to turn up so you send a quick text to them all to let you know that you’re here before sitting down in the opposite corner. 

The world passes slowly outside, people leave and enter the restaurant and you sit and play with the napkins put down by the waitress while you wait for someone to arrive. You’re halfway through your third paper napkin airplane when somebody does sit down opposite you, only it’s not who you hoped it would be and your face falls when you make eye contact with them. 

“Peter.” You mumble and try to focus on folding the wings. 

“Y/n.” He replies, a smile evident in his tone and you can feel his eyes looking you up and down. It makes your blood run cold and you’re not even looking at him, just the thought of him looking at you like that makes your skin crawl. “You’re not sat in here all by yourself are you?” He asks, his tone sickly sweet and you pull a face before looking at him, trying your best to seem unfazed by his presence. 

In reality, Peter is the worst person in the world. He insults, he fights and he schemes. And he always takes the wrap for it, even if it was Oscar who came up with it in the first place. However, because Peter does all of this for Oscar, and because your brother likes to have friends that act more like pets, he thinks that Peter can do no wrong. 

And the past two months he’s been pestering you to accept Peter’s offer to go out with him, despite trying to tell him how much you actually hate him. He may seem innocent and sweet when others are around, but when it’s just the two of you he says stuff like this. 

“Because I can always keep you company...if you know what I mean.” He says and reaches out towards you. You watch his hand slowly come towards you and you sit up a bit straighter so he can’t reach. His confidence flickers as he look from you to his outstretched hand before he drops it on the table and his horrible smile comes back. “Oh, I get it. You’re playing hard to get. I like that in a woman. It’s no fun if they give it up easily.” He grins and you have to refrain yourself from rolling your eyes again. 

A pit opens up in your stomach and the more he smiles the more it grows. You feel more like you’re hunted than talked to and you really wish that someone would show up soon so it gives him an excuse to leave. 

Today however, fate doesn’t seem to be on your side. Because somebody does turn up, it’s just the last person you want. 

“Oscar!” Peter smiles and the two of them fist bump. Peter’s whole demeanour changes when your brother turns up and you watch the walls come up. The smirk is replaced with a smile and he moves his hands away from you. 

Oscar looks between the two of you and knowing smile appears on his face. 

“I’m not interrupting anything am I?” 

“Well actuall-” 

“No.” You interrupt. “We were just talking. But now that you’re here I’m sure you all want to hang out. So goodbye Peter.” You say through gritted teeth and force a smile. Peter pouts and Oscar shakes his head at you. 

“You know, you could do a lot worse than Peter.” He says while Peter smirks behind him. “You should give him a chance.” 

“I’d rather stick two pencils up my nose and then smash my head against this table.” You reply with a sarcastic smile and Oscar rolls his eyes. 

“You’re gonna die alone with that attitude.” He says before walking away. 

“That’s better than spending a lifetime with him.” You reply and stare straight at Peter. His face reddens and his cheeks puff out a little while he tries to figure out a response, but you’ve already unlocked your phone and started texting again. 

“You know one day you’re going to realise what you’re missing out on and then you’re gonna beg me to take you out because you’ve realised you’re nothing but a sad little woman who nobody loves.” He seethes, his face inches away from yours and his face reddens with each word. 

His breath makes you feel sick and you bite your lip to stop yourself from saying or doing anything. Just look straight forward and he’ll leave soon. His floppy blonde hair pokes at your forehead making it itch and you wonder if maybe there’s something in the industrial strength gel he uses that you’re allergic to. 

“Hey Peter.” Veronica greets cheerily and he quickly turns around, the familiar fake smile coming back. She looks at you and then him before sighing and saying “Remember, I dated you and we all know she wouldn’t be missing out on much.” 

Your jaw drops a little and you have to stifle a laugh as Veronica waves him back to his table, his feet stomping against the linoleum. 

“Is he always like that?” Archie watches him walk away before asking you, his tone filled with concern and you feel yourself shrink under the pressure. Betty and Veronica send him a look before sitting down. Betty opposite you and Veronica beside. She wraps her arms around you, pulling you into a hug and the smell of expensive perfume floods your senses. 

You know that they’re looking at each other, none of which know what to say or do. They may be able to solve crimes and take down criminals, but when it comes to real life stuff like this, they’re next to useless. 

So they do what they do best, or at least Jughead does. 

“I’ll go get us some milkshakes, Y/n do you want your favourite?” He asks and you nod quickly. You sniffle and take a deep breath, you’re not going to let Oscar or Peter or any other stupid boy make you cry.

Jughead nods and as you lift your head you watch him quickly walk away, he sends a glare in the direction of your brother and his friends and a small smile twitches at your lips. 

Jughead Jones has never once been threatening, at least not to you, but you’re glad he’s making an effort. And you’re glad he offered to get the drinks instead of staying and saying something awkward. You love Jughead, but he isn’t the best at comforting people. 

Archie pulls a chair up, already accepting the fact that it’s his turn to sit at the end of the table...again, but today he doesn’t seem to mind. He’s too focused on you and trying to make you feel better. Even if he just gets a small smile from you, that’ll be enough and then he won’t have to kick Oscar, Peter or anyone else’s ass...right now. 

Oscar laughs loudly from his table on the other side of the diner and Betty rolls her eyes before looking at you and her expression softens as she reaches over the table to hold your hand.

“Y/n?” She asks and you force yourself to look at her. The tear in the leather seats isn’t the most interesting thing to look at usually, but when you’re avoiding talking about something, it becomes the most fascinating thing in the world. “What was all that about?” She adds and her and Veronica share an unsure look.

“It was nothing.” You shrug and try to force a smile. Archie knows it’s not real, they all do and even Jughead looks sad when he sits back down, carefully placing the milkshakes down. “Oscar has just got it into his head that me and Peter would be a great couple. I dunno, I guess he thinks Peter’s like the perfect Northsider or something like that. A part of me thinks he just does it to annoy me because he only ever brings it up when Peter’s around. But Peter’s been around an awful lot lately so I’ve never heard the end of it, plus he’s a total dick. He’s rude, mean and stuck up, only whenever Oscar’s around he acts like he’s god’s gift. But I can’t say that to Oscar because if I speak ill of anyone he considers a friend, he goes crazy. He shouts and screams and calls me names and I guess I’m just scared of them. Both of them really.” You rant, letting out a deep breath at the end and the four of them stare at you wide eyed. “Sorry, I’ve been keeping that in for a while.” You add and force an awkward smile.

“Shit Y/n.” Betty sighs. “We’re sorry.” She adds and squeezes your hand. 

“Yeah.” Jughead adds. “What can we do to help?” He asks and you look at him surprised. 

“I-er. I don’t know.” 

“Well then we’ll figure it out together.” Veronica smiles and hugs you again.

“Yeah.” Archie nods and leans over the table to grab your free hand. “What are friends for?”

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