#please I just like fun pirate adventures. we can’t have it in the main series anymore it feels like
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Oh yeah, actually, I also watched film red last night with my friend. I can see why someone compared it to movie six. I’m just kinda “eh” on it. A lot of the plot points and narrative structure stuff I was laughing incredulously at, also, me and my friend heckled usopp’s dad a whole bunch.
#malky talks about one piece#the thing is. one piece movies (like the series too I guess) keeps escalating the stakes#and like. making the conflict have so much global impact#and then of course pouring in so many uhhhh cameos or whatever and reasons for cameos#but I don’t like that. I just want fun contained pirate adventures#y’know low stakes just the straw hats doing their thing somewhere or other#don’t really have to shove lore in my face because it doesn’t matter outside the movie or anything#please I just like fun pirate adventures. we can’t have it in the main series anymore it feels like#so please at least do them in the movies#(‘I like fun pirate adventures’ I say as my favorite movie is baron omatsuri)#(I stand by it though. baron omatsuri is fun. it’s a fun time. it’s funny.)
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So Critical Role is on hiatus this week, and they’ll be taking another break over Christmas and New Years. Are you bored and needing another tabletop show to scratch that itch? Yes, there’s TAZ too, but they’re biweekly so you’ll still have off weeks. And everybody knows about Critical Role and TAZ. Don’t you want to try some of the lesser known but still very very good roleplaying shows?
I hope the answer is yes, because I’m gonna rec some of my favorites! Please feel free to reblog and add your favorites too! There are so many very good D&D/tabletop podcasts/web shows that get overlooked and a Critical Role hiatus is a great time to shine some light on those gems! And without further ado:
Not Another D&D Podcast: the campaign after the campaign! NADDPOD is set in a world that has already been saved by a team of legendary heroes...except maybe the legendary heroes didn’t do such a great job saving the world as we thought and fucked up quite a lot and left mountains of problems to be solved in their wake! NADDPOD has a great story and drama and heartbreak, but mostly it’s wildly hilarious. The Band of Boobs consists of Hardwon Surefoot (a human fighter raised by dwarves who left home for adventure and is used to be being a big fish in a small pond,) Beverly Toegold V (halfling paladin boyscout and Very Good Boy who’s trying to earn his merit badges) and Moonshine Cybin (wood elf druid, hillbilly and chaotic bi who flirts with every woman she meets. She has a possum companion named Pawpaw. I love Moonshine.)
Dungeons & Daddies (Not A BDSM Podcast): Four dads from our world gets transported into the Forgetten Realms on a quest to rescue their sons! This podcast is extremely goofy and if you thought the McElroys played Calvinball, you ain’t seen nothing yet. Dad jokes cause psychic damage, and there are a LOT of dad jokes. It’s 90% hilarious shenanigans and then 10% feelings (I cried about a character called Lizardboy Scales McStuffins.) The dads are Darryl Wilson (barbarian and stay at home coach dad, big softy on the inside,) Henry Oak(druid and mega crunchy hippie dad,) Glenn Close (bard and rock’n roll pot-smoking dad,) and Ron Stampler (rogue, emotionally detached stepfather and honestly probably a cryptid. What the fuck is Ron? We just don’t know.)
Dimension 20: Escape from the Bloodkeep: this is a fairly short webshow, just 6 episodes long, and I admit that I only checked it out because Matt Mercer and Erika Ishii were on it, but I absolutely loved it! Escape from the Bloodkeep follows the subordinates of the Lord of Shadows right before the great final battle of good vs evil that they were totally going to win...except a couple halflings threw some magic jewelry in a volcano and fucked everything up. It’s wildly funny as a LOTR parody but the evil villains end up becoming a found family at the end, because of course they do. The vile villains include Efink Murderdeath (elven grave cleric who turned evil to rebel against her dad,) Sokhbarr the Boglord (half orc ranger and basically the Steve Irwin of monsters,) Kraz-Thun AKA Leiland (anxious insecure Ringwraith warlock,) Lilith (queen of the spiders and wine mom to thousands of tiny spider kids,) Maggie (tiefling barbarian and daughter to the Lord of Evil) and Marcus St Vincent (human pirate who sided with evil to get rich.) Dimension 20 has some other shows like Fantasy High and The Unsleeping City that I’ve heard good things about, but I haven’t gotten around to watching them yet!
Rusty Quill Gaming: I’ve only just started this one but I love it already! It’s set in an alternate 19th century London that has magic and all the usual fantasy trappings, but also Lord Byron is there? It’s a lot of fun so far but I’ve been told that there’s a lot of pain coming and I’m very scared. The squad (at least where I’m at) includes: Sasha (socially awkward human rogue,) Hamid (halfling sorcerer and Fancy Lad,) Zolf (dwarf cleric, has a peg leg and possibly the owner of the team’s only brain cell) and Bertie (human fighter and loud, flashy buffoon.)
And it’s not a tabletop/roleplay podcast but I only got into Rusty Quill Gaming because of one of Rusty Quill’s other podcasts, The Magnus Archives, which I can’t recommend highly enough. It’s a horror series that follows the new head archivist at the Magnus Institute, which is an organization that documents all manner of supernatural and spooky shit. What happened to the last head archivist? It’s a ~mystery~. At first it seems like a bunch of stand alone stories but soon you start to realize that there are all these threads connecting everything and I can’t really say much more because a big part of the fun is seeing how the overarching story comes together. Also lots of LGBT+ characters. The main character is canon ace. Please listen to The Magnus Archives.
Hope you’ll give some of these a try, and again, feel free to add your own! Give some other shows some love!
#critical role#the adventure zone#naddpod#dungeons and daddies#rusty quill gaming#escape from the bloodkeep#the magnus archives
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this is a (super late) update to this fic rec post! i was planning to just keep editing and updating that post, but it’s been so old it no longer appears on tumblr search system and all, so here we are. be ready for some old school zosans in the mix
all complete
absolute favorites will be noted with a ♡
list will be updated as i find more
story count: 30 fics
last update: jan 5th 2020
CANON-VERSE
Goings On by clarify ♡
Zoro and Sanji understand each other, and sometimes have a very similar sense of humor. Even though they're worlds ahead of most, sometimes they can't help but to act their age.
easily one of my favorites. zoro and sanji are completely in character, being themselves and comfortable in each other’s spaces. for anyone who thinks zoro and sanji can’t get along in canon, this fic can easily prove them wrong.
Part Timer by 8ball ♡♡
Sanji really, really doesn't want to give Zoro a job at his restaurant. Zoro doesn't really even want to work there in the first place, but, well, there’s this thing with Sanji, and this thing with feelings and the whole thing is pretty damn stupid all together.
Zeff just wants grandkids. He’s too old for this bullshit anyways.
a wonderful, heart-wrenching, roller coaster ride of a post-series fic. this fic is not just a mere fic — it’s a zosan magnum opus with guest appearances by so many other characters, lots of crew hijinks and a must-read for everyone who craves for a happy ending for these good boys.
Say It Again by 8ball
Zoro tells Sanji how he feels. And then again. And again.
since we’re talking about 8ball i just want you to know i’d rec everything they’ve ever written, but special mention to say it again — a classic miscommunication trope fic done well where the miscommunication stems from fundamental misunderstanding of each other’s principles and views instead of just some plot-convenient coincidences. and soft zoro. god, he is soft.
The Wedding Night by cuethe-pulse (lj)
Zoro had never expected any of this.
major character death warning. don’t let the first few scenes fool you. note the warning; the last few lines were like a punch in the gut for me, except, you know, the good kind of punch. also, a quick rec of a drabble by the same author to soothe the pain after this one.
Roronoa Zoro: World’s Greatest Bug Killer by insaneidiot ♡
Sometimes, Zoro's life really sucks. He should've known better than to make fun of Sanji's bug phobia, though...
zoro’s internal monologue is hilarious — until today, this author is still my go-to expert on zoro’s voice, especially his more sarcastic side.
Quitting’s Easy by insaneidiot
Sanji decides to quit smoking. This is not quite so easy as he thinks it will be. Also, his crewmates (excluding Robin and Nami, of course!) are assholes.
fun, fun strawhat hijinks and oblivious sanji. the crew dynamics and especially sanji’s voice are pitch perfect. there’s a hint of luffy/nami that you can easily scroll past if it’s not your thing.
I can’t stop thinking that i can’t stop thinking by hieiandshino ♡
In which Brook changes tactics and Zoro is not amused. Everyone else is, though.
holy shit is this fic hilarious. i love comedy fics that manage to slip in thoughtful observations and character study in between the hijinks, and this fic pulls that off with flying colors.
The Walls See All by threesipsmore
Reiju hides a snail cam in her brother's room.
fun short fic from reiju’s pov. there’s never enough zosan set in whole cake island arc and this fic delivers.
Stormbird by Judin ♡
The Straw Hats' first landing in the New World is on Arashi Island, where it looks like they'll be spending a fun week attending the local festival and making new friends. Until they spot a strange pirate ship in the harbour, and Sanji starts behaving oddly. The Straw Hats become entangled with the mysterious Gently Pirates, a crew that harbour many secrets, and whose captain is a man out of Sanji's past who has the power to tear the Straw Hat crew apart.
it cannot be overstated how wonderful this fic is, and how it could’ve fit into the canon just nicely, like a better-written one piece movie, except with zosan. not only are sanji and zoro in character, every strawhat gets a spotlight and has pitch-perfect voices. brook is especially lovely in this fic.
Unintended Consequence by itsmylifekay
A group of marines charge, Zoro slices through them, and in that instant Sanji feels his own eyes grow wide. Because there, on the arm now outstretched towards him, steel glinting in hand, is the stupid bracelet he’d given Zoro. The bastard is actually wearing it.
there’s a reason this is the most kudo-ed zosan fic on ao3 right now — it’s so soft without being ooc, and there’s a quiet undercurrent of affection laid throughout the fic that will warm you up from the insides.
Somewhere Between Sorrow and Bliss by srididdledeedee
Sanji has never cared for winter.
He can see himself, is the thing. There are bits and pieces that poke through, but it’s not all him. It’s like staring in a fractured mirror. He knows, intellectually, that the person staring back at him is himself, but his face is splintered and his shape is distorted and his body is wrong.
a fantastic character study on trans!sanji and how he comes to terms with his identity with the help of his crewmates. supportive strawhats are always a lovely addition to a zosan fic
Give In To Love by libbylune
Zoro knows better than to think about it too much, but between the rowdy festivals and ancient unexplained temples on this island, it's hard to forget about wanting Sanji.
i love how this fic puts as much focus on the boys after the confession as it does before the confession. a good case fic with its own unique island adventure and i’m always a sucker for soft!zoro
Laundry by libbylune
Dealing with Sanji makes Zoro develop a lot of opinions about clothes.
there’s absolutely nothing hotter than bi!sanji who’s completely comfortable with his gender identity and sexuality. also gay disaster zoro fumbling his words whenever sanji is around is 1) accurate 2) hilarious.
Language of Swords by HaveMyWeedCookies ♡
It took them for a while but finally, Zoro asked if Sanji wanted to hold his sword.
i love fics that explore zoro’s relationship with his craft and his swords, and adding zosan into the mix is something i didn’t know i needed. an interesting outsiders pov zosan in the pov of zoro’s swords.
Ghost of a Chance by sabershadowkat
“I know, for sure, that I didn’t expect to miss everyone so much, including you.” Sanji cut a glance at Zoro and rephrased correctly, “Especially you.”
this fic handles tropes that are usually associated with character death fics, but manages to end it with a happy ending. zoro’s devotion here is heart-wrenching.
Idiot Romance by sabershadowkat
"This has to be a joke," Sanji muttered, poking at the colored petals. Zoro couldn't have just given him flowers.
a classic — this is literally the first zosan fic i’ve ever read — and a lovely one at that. sanji is oblivious and zoro attempts romance, not that zoro ever needed to.
festival night by thisislegit
“ANOTHER FEAT BY THE WORLD’S STRONGEST MAN, JORIRI.” The woman turned to Mr. Mohawk and with faux sympathy said, “Oh! Sorry, sir. Maybe next time. We can’t always beat the best, but we can do our best and that’s what matters. Do we have any other takers? ANY OTHER TAKERS READY FOR THE STRONG MAN CHALLENGE? HOW ABOUT YOU SIR? MADAM? YOU OVER THERE? ARE YOU INTERESTED?”
“What kind of shit name is Joriri,” said Zoro and Sanji in unison.
i’m an absolute sucker for fics that have zoro and sanji simply hanging out and enjoying each other’s company, comfortable in a way they couldn’t with their other crewmates, and this fic exemplifies that. just them being little shits and having fun with one another.
No Victory in Hesitation & the Past Has Its Lessons by EudaimonErisornae & vageege
Zoro has a lot of things he wants to say to Sanji, but he just needs one more day. || Zoro tries to fix a mistake he made in the past.
major character death warning. i died a little bit inside after reading this tbh. there are some devil fruits-explained time travel hijinks, but mostly it’s this looming, grim inevitability of death that’s written so pervasively throughout the fic that really got me.
Imperatives by dollcewrites
Zoro is confident in saying that Sanji is a man who doesn’t do what he’s told. Which is why, when a command accidentally slips from Zoro’s lips during foreplay, he is expecting to hear the cook’s scoff as he continues to do what he pleases.
i don’t tend to do pwp, but this isn’t just one — it’s a completely in-character piece about their relationship and dynamics.
when you say by bluewalk ♡
It's a long time in coming. Usopp can promise, but.
this fic is as much sanuso as it is zosan, and usopp here is — still very much usopp, but also a very beautiful take on his character as someone who spent a lot of time behind sanji’s back, and realizes that when he watches sanji’s back, he gets to see zoro’s, too.
a complete guide to falling in love by ThousandSunny
Sanji was trained in the Bridal Arts; this does not go unnoticed by the rest of his crew.
while the main ship is still zosan, the fic also focuses a lot on zoro and sanji’s relationship with the rest of the crew, and it’s one of those fics that really makes you realize how much of a family the strawhats is. a lovely read all around.
destructivity is a poison that run through our veins by wasteofmind
Zoro thinks that, someday, they are going to kill each other.
a dysfunctional take of their relationship. it’s fascinating in the same way a car crash is fascinating — there’s an undercurrent of something violent, something visceral. this is one of the fics that inspired me to write migratory animals.
ALTERNATE UNIVERSE
Ocean’s Child by 8ball ♡
Here's the truth: Zoro couldn't swim. He fell in the water and sank like a stone because there had never been anyone to teach him how to move his arms. He forgot that if he screamed for help the water would get in his mouth, and he even opening his eyes hurt.
Here’s the other truth, the one that stays a secret: a mermaid saved him.
a fascinating retelling of the one piece canon with mermaid!sanji. it feels a lot like a love letter to the seas, and it’s mesmerizing how sanji’s mermaid backstory is seamlessly weaved into the one piece canon.
with you by Cirro
How to find your life partner in three easy steps: 1. Punch them in the face 2. Insult their cognitive abilities 3. Embarrass them so much they agree to marry you
a wholesome two-part modern au series. my personal favorite is the second part, where sanji brings zoro home to meet zeff — complete with the two of them teasing sanji in their own ways.
The Proper Reaction (or What To Do When Your Son Brings His Boyfriend Home by three_days_late
Holidays at the Baratie were always hectic, but it's nothing Zeff can't handle. Sanji's new boyfriend, on the other hand...
on the topic of meet-the-family: the only thing more fun than zoro meeting zeff is zoro meeting zeff and the entirety of baratie staff. also includes one of my favorite line about bi!sanji: “sanji loves nice girls and bad boys”.
Exclusive by cuethe-pulse
Zoro loves Sanji, Sanji loves Zoro. Zoro wants to be exclusive, so Sanji should, too. Right?
this is a circus/bakery au. yes, you read that right, and yes, it works. i went into this fic with a lot of doubts and came out very satisfied with how fleshed out everyone in this au is, and i’m forever in awe with how the author can set up an entirely separate, vivid universe with so few words.
Delivery by styx_in_the_mud
Sanji is stuck delivering pizzas when Patty is out of commission for a while. Zoro likes to order pizza after training. Both of them are sort of idiots, but Zoro can be smooth as fuck if he puts his mind to it.
a fun, in-character au with good ol’ banter and cute get-together.
The End of It All by xpiester333xx
Humans have been forced underground due to the effects of a chemical weapon that has made surface life impossible. Sanji lives in one of these underground colonies and though he dreams of bigger things his life has been mundane; spent following strict rules and obeying higher commands. Or it was, until a stranger shows up and changes everything.
the author labelled it as sci-fi au, but I personally think it’s more dystopian-like? either way, while this fic is on the long side, it manages to keep everyone in character until the very end, which is something that can’t be said for a lot of fics.
well, there we go! feel free to drop me an ask if you want to rec me fics or ask for a more specific/themed rec list; i’ll also update this post regularly !!
i also have an ao3 donutsandcoffee if you want to see my take on these dorks o/
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My FanFic compilation
I figured I have written quite a lot over the years and especially this year, that putting together something like this, that has everything I’ve written so far in one place all organized would be a good idea! So please! Enjoy!
There’s quite a lot so they’ll all be listed under the read more, They’re all organized by series (fairy tail, swtor, mass effect, dragon age, greedfall, anthem, and smut fics) as well as by pair with a short description, starting with the first fic I wrote (fairy tail) and the latest (fictober 2020 prompts) :D
Fairy Tail: (Leading off with this because it’s my first ever fic) -Shall We Dance, Pair: Laxus/Lucy: 38 chapters, Finished https://archiveofourown.org/works/4351550/chapters/9870611
Swtor: Main fic: -Breaking the Bad News (aka BTBN), multi-pair, main focus is shan trio: currently 70 chapters, Ongoing. https://archiveofourown.org/works/9340892/chapters/21164699
Side Fics: Kara Hawke’s Backstory(s):
Pre-Class story: -A Smuggler’s Tyr, no pairing, intro to Kara’s first crew: Currently 1 chapter, Complete (Might add more eventually)
During Class Story: -Adventure of a Lifetime, no pairing focus but will mention Darmas, meant to build on what we have of the in game class story: Currently 1 chapter, hiatus (plan to work on more with 2021)
Post Class Story: -Hawke Legacy: While Kara Sleeps, mentioned Theron/Kara, focus’s on Koro delivering the news of Marr’s ship being attacked to Theron. 1 chapter, Complete -Downtime, Theron/Kara, Post arrival on Odessen but prior to chapter 9 on kotfe, 1 chapter, complete -Desert Reunion, Theron/Kara, Introducing Kara’s dad and bringing him into the Alliance, 3 chapters, complete -A Moment, Theron/Kara, but starting to poke at the idea of Arcann being involved, 1 chapter, complete
Prompts: -Fictober 2018, day 1: Can you feel this?, Kara/Arcann/Theron, post-umbara/pre-copero so theron’s only mentioned -Fictober 2018, day 3: How can I trust you?, Kara/Arcann/Theron, post-Nathema, and a bit on the trio +kids, dealing with Theron’s return -Fictober 2018, day 5: Take what you need, mentioned Kara/Caleb (her first husband from her original crew), takes place before the class stories, short story about a job she had done -Fictober 2018, day 6: I’ve heard enough, this ends now. Kara/Arcann (sometime pre-nathema so sorry Theron’s not really in this one), bit of covering a reoccuring nightmare Kara had for a few months -Fictober 2018, day 7: No Worries, we still have time, Kara/Arcann/Theron (Arcann’s not present tho, just mentioned), little bit of the pair of workaholics +kids taking a break -Fictober 2018, day 12/13: Who could do this/Try harder next time, Kara/Arcann/Theron & Koren/Trey (Will have this in both pairs), sometime post-nathema probably, little adventure with Kara involving having to save her sons -Prompt: I Care about You, Theron/Kara, little bit of a rebuild of their kotfe reuinion -Prompt: Come Cuddle, Kara/Arcann/Theron, Short fluff story of one of their movie nights with some bad jokes -Promptless idea: Arcann Singing, Kara/Arcann/Theron, I’ve always had this idea that Arcann can sing at least as well as Senya does, so here’s a bit of him singing to kara’s boys, and also kara. -Fictober 2019, day 2: Just Follow me, I know the area, Kara/Arcann mainly, post onslaught so Theron’s involved but just not featured in this prompt. Little bit of a romantic night out. -Fictober 2019, day 3: Now? Now you listen to me?, Kara/Arcann/Theron, follow-up to the fictober 2018 day 6 prompt, and resolution to the chronic nightmares Kara was having -Fictober 2020, day 7: Yes I did, what about it?, Kara/Arcann/Theron, post-nathema, small bit of theron and kara heart to heart about a choice she made (involving Valss because I’m still bitter we didn’t get a save option for him) and both prosthetic users in the trio are sore (maybe there’s a storm moving in) -Fictober 2020, day 15: Not interested, thank you, Kara/Arcann/Theron (Arcann isn’t present for this), one of a handful of reminders that Kara and Theron are parents, connor just really wants to make his lightsaber -Fictober 2020, day 18: You don’t see it?, Kara/Arcann/Theron (post umbara pre Nathema so theron is only mentioned), something of a pep-talk from arcann.
Nora Hawke/Mikael Hawke: -That Time Back When We First Met, backstory on how my sith warrior and pub trooper met before they started their relationship: currently 2 chapters, hiatus (plan to work on more with 2021) -Fictober 2018, day 4: Will that be all?, little bit after they first met, can be considered a continuation chapter... technically
Koren Gates/Trey Hawke: -Fictober 2018, day 2: People Like you have no imagination, Koren/Trey & Shey/Torian (will put it for both pairs), little adventure of my bounty hunter squad +sith BF -Fictober 2018, day 12/13: Who could do this/Try harder next time, Kara/Arcann/Theron & Koren/Trey (Will have this in both pairs), sometime post-nathema probably, little adventure with Kara involving having to save her sons -Fictober 2020, day 13: I missed this, Koren/Trey, bit of fluff between my overly caring hunter who could use a day off and his grump of a sith boyfriend. -Fictober 2020, day 28: Do I have to do everything here?, Kara/Arcann/Theron, Arcann and Koth decide to play a co-op holonet game, with only minor arguing. -Fictober 2020, day 30: Just say it, Kara/Arcann/Theron, Kara gets a little time to herself and the trio’s weekly movie night ends up being a bit more than just the three of them.
Shey Shen/Torian Cadera: -Fictober 2018, day 2: People Like you have no imagination, Koren/Trey & Shey/Torian (will put it for both pairs), little adventure of my bounty hunter squad +sith BF -Prompt: I’m Right Where I Belong, Shey/Torian sometime post kotet, a rare time that I bring up the fact that she has amnesia and still can’t remember anything prior to about 2 years prior to the class stories starting. -Prompt: ... out of habit (kiss), former Shey/Koro mention as well as Shey/Torian, because Koro is a mess and while him and Shey have been divorced for years habits die hard. -Fictober 2020, day 8: I’m not doing that again, Shey/Torian & Kurana/Andronikos (will be under both pairs), Little bit of a fun idea of who would win in a fight, our dear pirate or mando
Kurana Knight/Andronikos Revel: -Prompt: One Falling Asleep with their head in the other’s lap, Kurana/Andronikos, I keep thinking of this prompt now and then because writing Niko being soft for his wife is a lot of fun. -Fictober 2020, day 8: I’m not doing that again, Shey/Torian & Kurana/Andronikos (will be under both pairs), Little bit of a fun idea of who would win in a fight, our dear pirate or mando
Lyra Hawke/Doc: -Fictober 2020, day 1: No, Come Back!, Lyra/Doc, little adventure on an unnamed planet that I honestly love the idea of -Fictober 2020, day 6: That was Impressive, Lyra/Doc, Another little adventure of information gathering featuring Kara’s youngest son, Connor. -Fictober 2020, day 22: And neither should you, Lyra/Doc, little bit of fluff and doc trying to get his wife to take a day off
Ren Hawke/Vinn Atrius: -Fictober 2020, day 9: Will you Look at this?, Ren/Vinn, I need to write more of them outside of btbn so this was a start to hopefully more building on my didn’t plan to ship this as strongly as I ended up doing pair.
Ava Reiner/Jonas Balkar: -Fictober 2020, day 20: Did I ask?, Ava/Jonas, Small job featuring a couple of SIS agents, and including a bounty hunter I got attached to in a hurry.
Kyri Dennan/Arn Peralun: -Fictober 2020, day 21: This, this makes it all worth it, Kyri/Arn, little build up for another pair that I didn’t expect to get attached to, featuring some implant maintanence.
Airi/Theron (one off because disaster spy/spy pairing I had to write at least once): -Admittance, 1 chapter, complete
WoW: Aulara Stormdawn/Kieran Grimmarrow: -Lunar Eclipse, (Technically my first fic but I didn’t post it until after Shall We Dance), A story involving Aulara (an orphaned night elf priestess), Koren Haven (her brother from the orphanage, a human paladin), Kieran (a blood elf noble, hunter who doesn’t have much people skills), and the friends they meet including Rokar an old orc shaman and Sen a orc huntress, that navigates through the warcraft story starting with vanilla wow. Currently 7 chapters, on hiatus but planning on picking it up again in 2021! -Fictober 2020, day 4: That didn’t stop you before, Aulara/Kieran, A quest during Legion and a bit of a flashback from one of their first quests together around when they first started fighting side by side during BC -Fictober 2020, day 25: Sometimes you can even see, Aulara/Kieran, The burning of Teldrassil and Kieran deciding he’s willing to risk everything he’s ever known to be with his wife. Koren is there to give him a hand. -Fictober 2020, day 26: How about you trust me for once?, Aulara/Kieran, early BC before they became a couple, Kieran and Aulara get a moment to talk alone in Nagrand, involves something close to an awkward confession. >:3
Shey Wrynn/Varian Wrynn: -Prompt: Are you testing me?, Shey/Varian, post WoD but pre-Legion, little walk through elwynn turning into an adventure between the king and his wife, Shey is not amused when he charges in head first. -Fictober 2020, day 2: That’s the easy part, Shey/Varian, mid to late WoD, bit of fluff while planning the push towards hellfire citadel, bit of fluff and bit of proposal. >:3 -Fictober 2020, day 10: All I ever wanted, Shey/Varian, post-BFA Pre-Shadowlands, proof I can write at least a little bit angsty, some platonic Shey & Anduin. -Fictober 2020, day 16: I never wanted anything else, Shey/Varian, something short around late Cata early MoP involving Shey having a birthday. -Fictober 2020, day 27: Give me that, Shey/Varian, probably what I consider the most ooc i’ve written him but honestly i had a lot of fun writing them being dorks. -Fictober 2020, day 31: I trust you, Shey/Varian, sometime early Cata soon after they started a relationship. The one and probably only time I’ll ever mention Shey’s old house, and a touch on the fact that i’m 100% certain that Varian would try and sneak out of the city time to time.
Shey & Anduin (platonic, it’s always platonic/familial between them) -Fictober 2020, day 19: I can’t do this anymore, Shey & Anduin, because sometimes a girl just needs to sneak her son out of the city to give him a break and maybe check out a ruin or something.
Shey Wrynn/Aethas Sunreaver: -Prompt: By your side, Shey/Aethas. Post legion, a bit of a moment between them early BFA. I started writing them as a potential pair before settling as friends with benefits that might form into more, so this is a possible hinting at them becoming “more”
Mass Effect: John Shepard/Kaidan Alenko: -Prompt: War’s End Kiss, Shenko, Post ME3 when they’re just a couple of retired old soldiers and John’s slowly recovering from his injuries from the final push. -Fictober 2019, day 4: I know you didn’t ask for this, Shenko, Post ME3, a bit of a heart to heart between them and tending to slowly healing injuries. -Fictober 2020, day 3: You did this?, Shenko, Post ME3, Kaidan runs across some old footage of John over the years from before they met to the reaper war. -Fictober 2020, day 14: You better leave now, Shenko, during ME3, short mission against a hold out of mercs, featuring James. -Fictober 2020, day 24: Are you kidding me?, Shenko, during ME3 probably, featuring Kaidan “my headache doesn’t hurt that bad” Alenko and John “please just take a nap” Shepard. -Fictober 2020, day 29: Back up!, Shenko, during ME3, mission to clear out a cerberus warehouse including some battle flirting and James lending a gun.
Scott Ryder/Gil Brodie: -Fictober 2020, day 12: Watch me, Ryder/Gil, Post main MEA story, something short of Scott looking forward to getting out and exploring while Gil (and eventually Sara) work on the Nomad. (Sara is my pathfinder)
Dragon Age: Garrett Hawke/Fenris: -Dawning, Fenhawke, Short bit of fluff and my firt step into writing dragon age. Late or post DA2.
Lia Hawke/Fenris (a one off when I was debating on canon hawkes & romances for them): -Fictober 2020 day 5: Unacceptable, try again. Fenhawke, little bit of teasing and bad taste in books.
Rana Cousland/Alistair Theirin: -Promptless ramble, Rana/Alistair, Set during DAO with Rana reflecting on those she’s lost, worrying for her brother and realizing just how in love she’s fallen with Alistair. -Fictober 2020, day 23: Do we have to?, Rana/Alistair, set post DAO, pre-DAI, little romantic picnic between the king and queen of ferelden before she heads off on her next mission. (hints at Nathaniel being involved with the both of them.)
Greedfall: Lydia de Sardet/Kurt -Fictober 2020, day 11: I told you so, Lydia/Kurt, short bit trying to get my footing writing these two, Lydia thinks she can still climb trees like she used to as a kid. -Fictober 2020, day 17: Give me a minute or an hour, Lydia/Kurt, short bit, and Kurt not being as subtle about his feelings about Lydia as he probably thinks he has.
Anthem: Raya Auren/Matti (1 of the 3 Matthias Sumner) -Fictober 2019 day 1: It’ll be fun, trust me, Raya/Matti, Bit of an adventure involving Raya taking her favorite arcanist out of fort tarsis to see something very special. (also involving me having no clue how they transport people when there’s only one javelin and winging it)
Smut: (all of them are swtor so far) -A Moment Reprised, Kara/Arcann, takes place post-umbara and pre-nathema, and sometime late in BtBN, no plot. -Moving on, Koren/Trey, takes place right before chap 35 of BtBN, featuring my dorks of a hunter and sith setting in stone they’re serious about each other. no plot -Just a short vacation, Kara/Theron, takes place post-nathema pre-onslaught, A moment in Kara and Theron’s honeymoon at a lovely resort and the closest to taking a day off Theron will ever probably take. No plot -Welcome Home, Kara/Arcann/Theron, unlike the other 3 doesn’t have a specific time that it takes place other than post nathema. No plot
#my writing#this took forever i didn't realize i've written so much over the years#going forward i'm going to just add new ones onto this so they just stay connected without me having to redo this
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Ducktales Reviews: The Trickening!
Halloween Havoc continues! Louie’s greed and lack of concern for his brother’s feelings or well thought out schedule leads them to a real life haunted house with vampire clowns, dummies, a scary well lady and a gelatinous cube. Because there’s’es always room for gelatinous cube. Meanwhile Della wants to use Launchpad’s dangerous misconceptions about halloween to traumatize children for funzies and Donald had a problem with that for some reason. Also Scrooge is kind of an asshole on Halloween it turns out. No one is suprised. Ghosts, goblins, and full review with spoilers under the cut.
Happy halloween month everybody! Halloween Havoc, aka my spate of halloween reviews continues as I roll into my first actual halloween episode review of the season! Yeah weird but so far we’ve covered demons getting exorcisims, little girls thinking they can raise the dead, and a horrifying plauge guided by the human incarnation of all that is evil, but not the actual holliday itself. Weird ain’t it? Well that changes with this so as always pitter patter.
It’s HALLOWEEN here in duckberg, and the mansion kids are planning Trick or Treating. Natural given Huey’s OCD, he has everything planned out a and naturally the kids all have unique and adorable costumes. Huey is gizmoduck, though with a GK instead of GD, a nice nod to “New Gizmokids on the BLock’ From the original series, an episode I haven’t seen but have heard of so theres that. It’s also because he likely wants to be Fenton’s kid sidekick which.. yeah please do that show. It’d be so fucking adorable. Plus Huey needs to be happy for once without having to go through a gauntlet of misery first. Let my boy be happy. +
Anyways Dewey’s is rather disapointing as it’s a “pirate on vacation” which while hilarious and very dewey, is kind of an anti-climax after months of speculation. Webby is some kind of ancient demon king as apparently in the duckverse the origins of halloween are based on appeasing various monsters, and this is so she can hide from them effectively. And Louie.. is Huey. Which means putting on Huey’s hat and a terribly insulting impression of him.
Meanwhile Donald and Della are an angel and a devil, with, which I didn’t realize until a tumblr post, Della’s costume being the one one of the boys wore in the classic disney trick or treat short. So that’s a nice nod. Donald wants to nicely give out candy while Della wants to terrify the children. Both end up disapointed as Scrooge instead boots everyone from the house and locks the mansion gates, as he doesn’t like giving out handouts which.. yeah that tracks.
As it turns out Scrooge also has his own plans.. which are gloriously ludicrous, sounding like something Glomgold would do: He’s going to go trick or treating himself, as when he was a boy, this was the one time of year a poor lad like him could get treats and he worked his tail off to do so and wants to prove he’s still got it. And as we see later SOMEHOW he still gets candy. It’s like if THIS was actually sucessful.
I would genuinely not be suprised if Scrooge too hadn’t tried to get an oil well from an elementary school this way. As for leaving candy out he leaves out an empty take one bowl which is as clever as it is douchey. So in other words Scrooge in a nutshell. So with handing out treats and scares at the house a non-option, Della and Donald go to see what Launchpad’s doing since Beakly.. is.. I have no fucking idea. NO I really don’t, she shows up for the ending, but before that? If they mentioned where she was I clearly missed it because she’s just.. missing for most of the episode and given every other member of the main cast is accounted for this episode, it’s VERY noticable. Give her more to do dangit!
So yeah we get our two plots, which i’ll cover seperately, then cover the ending where they dovetail together. Kay? Kay.
The Kid’s Plot centers around Huey and Louie.. specifically Louie wanting to go to a real life haunted house while Huey, as mentinoed has heavily established plans for their night. As for why Louie would go into danger, well as usual for when he does that theirs something in it for him: Rumor has it no kid has ever made it out with their candy.. thus leaving decades worth of candy just waiting to be nabbed and thus never having to trick or treat again. One big score for a payoff.. which didn’t make a lot of sense on first thought and my best guest is whatever preservative Gyro used for Oxy Chew, since it was still edible decades later, was probably spread to other candies since there’s no way in hell Scrooge would pass up a zillion dollar invention like that. Either way works. Huey is outvoted as Dewey naturally wants the excitment and Webby wants to see if her demon costume works on actual demons. However things quicklky go wrong as they ecoounter a dewey dummy and a killer dummy, as well as a monster clown and a gelatonous cube, which yes. I may not play DnD but I love these things.
The kids escape the house by accident while tryign to escape and Louie, still being a dick about things, finds out Huey DID know abotu the stash btu avoided it and Louie lays into Huey.. a bit much honestly, feeling he was agaisnt it purely because it wasn’t on schedule.. when you know, Louie could’ve asked to put it on schedule or actually given a damn about this, especially since Huey’s planned their trick or treats EVERY YEAR, so he’s had a full year to ask for this insane idea, or even the short time he’s known about it if shorter. Sure huey might of sputtered a bit, but Louie knows his other siblings, Webby and Dewey could convince him to loosen up and include the house. Louie’s just being kind fo a selfish dick here.. however i’ts not so overwhelming as to overpower the episode, as he has been before and while he should know better about risking his family’s lives after “Timephoon!” it is in character for him to protiize a big score like this over other people’s feelings and it’s not even the first time this season he’s done that. So fair enough.
But we soon get the second best reveal of the episode: As the kids are backed into a corner by monsters.. they grumble theres no candy and it turns out the monsters.. ARE REAL.. but their traditional monsters like frankenstein, dracula, and the bride of frankenstein, just dressed up like this to scare kids. As it turns out the WHOLE THING is an elaborate yearly scooby doo hoax to get kids candy, with the brilliant twist it’s done by actual monsters> As the vampire points out they can’t exactly shop during the day.. or he can’t at least, so this is how they get candy for the year.. at tribute if you will. Also the Gelationous Cube gets a nice hat as you see above. It’s a REALLY clever twist and I absolutely love it. I DID NOT see it coming and even with some spoiler screenshots I thankfully did not have it spoiled for me. REALLY good stuff.
As for why Huey’s been so obessed with his planning.. it’s actually really clever and really good character stuff: Huey simply got really into it because back when they were with donald this WAS their adventure for the year: the one time he let them cut loose and have fun, and he got a real kick out of it.. and Louie getting candy for life kind of destroys that. And that’s why Louie still works here.. because he instnatly realizes from this that was the problem and apologizes in his own way. It’s a nice bit of character from both: We’ve rarely had their pre-mansion lives factor in and it’s nice to see it for a change, and it’s nice to see Louie isn’t all dick, just like 20% dick. Unforutnately having no candy dosen’t appease the monsters who are pissed and descend on the kids.. until.. well for the until we have to back up a bit. So onto the adult plot we go! Della and Donald go to Launchpad whose dressed in a jason mask and ash williams/jason coveralls, weilding a power sander and having barricaded his place. After he scares some children, a bit too much, and Della and Donald are reallyd amn confused, he explains.. and we get the best reveal of the episode.. which given the above is saying something but it’s clear like the “blath” gag in “Astro BOYD” and the non-anthro ducks gag last week, this is one of those things Frank has been keeping under his hat all series. So as a boy Launchpad crashed his tryke into the mansion, ran into the monsters after reading off a candy wrapper.. and now assumes he unleashed a horde of monsters onto the world every halloween.. and tha’ts what he assumes the trick or treaters are. I just .. dont’ have a lto of words. This is pure comedy gold and easily the best gag of the episode and oen fo the best of the series. It’s clever, fresh, and really fits the character. Naturally Della wants to exploit this to terrify children ebcause she has underlying issues to adress while Donald tries to stop her. Thankfully before Della can get launchpad to scar children for life, Scrooge shows up and fights launchpad.. it’s part of why I also find scrooge’s dickery acceptable as launchpad beats the shit out of him.. it’s still an even fight, as not to suspend disbelief, but Scrooge still looses. I mean he gets out of being trapped in his candy bag easily because scrooge btu still, props to launchpad. So Launchpad decides to go face his fears and Donald and Della decide to stop him before he doesd a muder on a child. Which leads to an AMAZING climax as Launchpad scooby doo chases the scared monsters around as they have no idea what the fuck’s going on and hte monsters end up really enjoying his scar eof htem and bowing to the master. It’s a good way to end it. After Della explains what’s going on, Louie and Huey decide to explain halloween to Launchpad by taking him to the once house he hasn’t been: the Manor. Scrogoe has finally opened it up, with a line of kids no less, the monsters bond with some kids in line. As for why.. as Webby sadly figures out Scrooge is charging admission, thakns to dewey who thought an all night candy store was a good idea which.. yeah it is. So everyone gets a happye ending and the monsters hang a photo of hte night up in the mansion. A really sweet ending, pun uintended but eh it’s welcome.
Final Thoughts. Easily one fo the series best. While the characters are a bit exagerated in places, i.e. della, launchpad , scrooge and louie, it works for the plot well enough and the jokes well enough to make it okay. My only real complaint is a lack of even a cameo from Lena and Violet, as it feels weird to not even have htem in the ending, much less trick or treating with their friends. It just feels odd and could’ve used a throaway line. I get WHY not , as Lena even pre-blue would’ve destoryed the tension with the monsters, but it still feeels really weird to not have them. But it’s a minor quibble in an otherwise REALLY funny and creative episode and a fun halloween treat to revist every year from now on. Really good work. That does it for this week. For more halloween treats, follow this blog throughout october. So far i’ve done reviews of Demonicsim from Star Vs The Forces of Evil for Tomtober, Croaked, the Casagrandes day of the dead Special and the first of Marvel’s mini-series adapting Stephen’ King’s epic novel The Stand. And until next monday, or sooner if you decide to check any of that out, happy halloween!
#halloween#ducktales#the trickening#huey duck#louie duck#della duck#donald duck#dewey duck#webby vanderquack#scrooge mcduck#launchpad mcquack#monsters#super creeps#keeps me running running scared#october#reviews#animation
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The 42 Greatest Anime Moments of Monkey D. Luffy
May 5 is the birthday of One Piece's main character Monkey D. Luffy, and over the past couple of decades of his existence, he's given us some moments that will stay in our minds forever. And so I've decided to chronicle 42 of his best ones, antics that will hopefully remind you how much you love the free-spirited, determined, ridiculous Birthday Best Boy. One note, though — while this list does contain some of those sweet, sweet fight scenes, I've already written a list that ranked his 20 greatest knockouts against bad guys. So, in order to not repeat that list entirely, I've tried to mix it up a little bit.
1. Luffy Wakes Up From A Great Nap
I can't think of a better anime debut for Monkey D. Luffy than "wakes up in the barrel that he miraculously survived a whirlpool in and immediately knocks out some pirates by accident." It's everything fun about the dude rolled into one.
2. Luffy Gets Coby To Hit Him
One thing that doesn't get mentioned enough about Luffy is his haphazard, yet skillful ingenuity. He knows that Koby will never get to join the Marines if he's associated with pirates, so Luffy, his one brain cell working overtime, gets Koby to punch him in order to prove that they're not friends because would friends brawl on the floor of a restaurant?
3. Luffy Gets The Straw Hat
A moment from the first chapter of the manga that was delayed until Episode 4 of the anime, Luffy getting the straw hat from Shanks is iconic. It sets in motion his entire journey and creates a symbol that represents freedom, adventure, and destiny.
4. Luffy Gives Nami The Straw Hat
Luffy giving Nami his straw hat is more than just a simple, comforting gesture. It's Luffy telling Nami that if she wants, she'll be a Straw Hat now and for the rest of her life. Nami may have problems, but she'll never have to deal with them alone ever again.
5. Luffy Gets His First Bounty
By gaining a bounty when he takes down Arlong, Luffy is introduced to the wider world of pirating, the World Government, and eventually the Grand Line. Though Buggy's reveal that he knew Shanks and Mihawk's appearance hinted at a wider world, this is Luffy's first real step into it.
6. Luffy Smiles At Death
Luffy obviously doesn't want to die. But as he smiles at the crowd and his crew while Buggy brings a sword down onto his neck, he grins. Because he didn't die in vain. He never became Pirate King and he never found the One Piece, but he did live his life exactly the way that he wanted to. And that's more important than any title or treasure. I'm glad he didn't die, though. They never would've found the Grand Line if Zoro had ascended to the role of Captain. They'd probably still be arguing in the Loguetown harbor.
7. Luffy Holds Up Hiriluk's Flag
Wapol wanted to destroy Hiriluk's flag and thus eliminate his legacy. But Luffy — smoking due to being recently shot by a cannon and holding up the flag — proved that's not something you can just do. As long as someone is there to fight for it, a flag is forever.
8. Luffy Disagrees With Vivi
Vivi, frustrated, enraged, and embarrassed about the treatment of her country, was more than ready to sacrifice herself for it ... and only herself. But Luffy wasn't hearing it. If she was going down, they were all going down. It wasn't just Vivi's fight anymore. The Straw Hats had reached Ride or Die status.
9. Luffy Beats Crocodile
I did a list of Luffy's best knockouts so I'm not gonna list every major punch here. However, the ones that are especially meaningful deserve recognition. And this one, where, after two defeats, Luffy battered Crocodile up through the streets of Alubarna, is inarguably one of the most memorable. It's a triumph that's a long time coming, equal parts brutal and satisfying.
10. Luffy Lets Himself Get Beat Up And Meets Blackbeard
Mirroring Shanks' restraint when he let himself get harassed by the Mountain Bandits, here we see Luffy decide not to fight Bellamy and instead he listens to Bellamy's foolish proclamations about why dreams suck and why you shouldn't have them and why Mylo Xyloto is the best Coldplay album, probably. However, even if he didn't need the pick-me-up, Blackbeard meets him outside to reaffirm that dreams never die. It would be a super nice remark ... if anyone but Blackbeard was saying it.
11. Luffy Is Immune To Enel
Until this point, Enel is borderline unstoppable, able to strike down anyone in his path and — with the help of his "mantra" — barely takes any damage in the process. And it's made him pretty cocky. But to see Enel's face distort in cartoonish disbelief when he realizes that Luffy is a Rubber Type Pokemon and that he's impervious to Electric Types is so joyously satisfying.
12. Luffy Decides To Get Rid Of The Going Merry
With the Going Merry slowly becoming unusable and actually becoming a handicap to the crew, Luffy figures that it's time to find a new ship. It's a sad moment, but you can't help but see Luffy's side. A good pirate crew needs a good pirate ship. And if the Going Merry suddenly sinks, Luffy is dead. Like very, very dead.
13. Luffy Faces Usopp
Usopp relates to the Going Merry, fearing that its "weakness" and "inadequacy" represents his own. And so when Luffy decides to get rid of the ship, Usopp lashes out, causing Luffy to have to "put down" Usopp. It's a difficult decision, but it shows that Luffy isn't all laughs and "I'm gonna be King of the Pirates!" declarations.
14. Luffy Does Not Recognize Sogeking
And then, after the most heartfelt showdown in the series, Luffy doesn't even recognize Usopp's Sogeking disguise, despite the fact that he has most of Usopp's traits, most of Usopp's weapons, and showed up only a little while after Usopp left. Oh, Luffy. Never stop being you.
15. Luffy Goes Second Gear
Power-ups are pretty common in anime. But Luffy saying that he needs to take his skills up another level so that he won't lose his friends still feels pretty special. And then the music kicks in and Luffy beats Blueno to a pulp and it's one of the most hype scenes in the entire series.
16. Luffy Declares War On The World
He'll always have a target on his back, he'll never be able to rest easy again, and the World Government will pursue him as long as he draws breath. Luffy knows this, but when the time comes to save Robin from CP9 in Enies Lobby, he doesn't hesitate to take on the whole world. It's just what friends do.
17. Luffy Refuses To Fall
When Luffy and Lucci fight, it isn't a quick contest. They go to absolute war on one another. And when Lucci thinks he's won, having left Luffy spitting up blood on the floor, we see that ... no. Luffy will not leave his feet. He has too much pride, too much grit, and too much determination. Defeat is not an option here. He will stop fighting to retrieve Robin when he's dead.
18. Luffy Is Reunited With Garp
For a long time, Luffy's actual flesh and blood family was a mystery. Shanks is kind of a cool uncle and Ace is someone that Luffy considers his brother, but where did Luffy, ya know, come from? As it turns out, his grandpa is the cannonball-throwing Marine Vice Admiral Garp, who is not only just as goofy as Luffy, but also really, really, really strong for being 76. What's his secret? Low carbs? Eiichiro Oda, please let me know.
19. Luffy Punches The Celestial Dragon
Luffy can't stand bullies or anyone that relishes the misery of others. So when a Celestial Dragon shoots Hatchan in the auctioneering house, Luffy walks right up to him and turns his face into a catcher's mitt.
20. Luffy Loses His Crew
Luffy's darkest hour (so far) comes when, in a fight with Kuma, Kizaru and the Pacifistas, his whole crew eventually gets wiped out and spread across the world. All the while, Luffy is powerless to stop it — his Gum Gum skills no match for Kuma's abilities. It's a truly pitiable thing to see Luffy beat his fists on the ground in futility, something entirely unlike any scene in the series before.
21. Luffy Covers Sandersonia
Back in Little Garden, Luffy agreed it wasn't necessary to actually have a reason for the fight between the giants. They were having an honorable contest between warriors. That was enough. Later when Sandersonia's scars were about to be revealed after a battle, Luffy covered them up. He had no interest in killing them or exposing their secrets. That is not what the battle was for. The contest was simply one that he wanted to win so he'd eventually get back to his crew.
22. Luffy Decides To Save His Brother Before Reuniting With His Crew
When Luffy learns that Ace is to be put to death, he must make a choice: Get the gang back together or dive into the depths of Impel Down and try to rescue his brother. He ends up choosing the latter, which shows a great deal of trust and respect for his crewmates. He knows they're strong enough to be OK without him for now.
23. Luffy Embraces Mr. 2
This is just plain wholesome. Luffy's love for his friends is might be the best thing about him.
24.Luffy Falls From The Sky
Luffy's story isn't just about his quest to find the One Piece, but the formation of a legend. And when Luffy and the other Impel Down escapees plummet from the sky into the Marineford war, you can practically see that legend being written.
25. Luffy Faces The Admirals
Yes, Luffy's attempts to kick a frozen log at them goes nowhere. And yes, Luffy is almost immediately knocked down by Kizaru when he tries to rush past him. But the guts in that kid! Facing down three of the most powerful men in the One Piece universe and demanding they give Ace back to him. That is moxie, my dudes.
26. Luffy Goes Comatose
Ace is dead. The mission has failed. A brother is lost. And all Luffy can do is go numb and lifeless. He has no words or actions to explain or react. A chunk of his soul has been ripped away.
27. Luffy Realizes He Still Has His Friends
Yes, his attempt to save Ace was a bust. But in the most hopeless of times, Jimbei asks him what he still has. And Luffy remembers he still has his friends — friends he has been there for in the past and who will most certainly be there for him later. They are still there. And because they are still there, Luffy's existence has worth.
28. Luffy Gets An Upgrade
Reuniting with his crew in Sabaody, it doesn't take too long for Luffy to find a way to show off the results of two years of training. He's been doing some grinding, so his skill tree has some new branches. He's unlocked some new abilities, and he's reached his evolved form. When a Pacifista comes at the Monster Trio (Luffy, Zoro, and Sanji,) they beat the bear out of it.
29. Luffy Decides To Make Fish-Man Island His Territory
For the most part, Luffy doesn't really care about the dominance sought by other powerful characters. But after he's gotten to know the citizens of Fish-Man Island and he sees the terror caused by Big Mom, he tells her straight-up he's gonna defeat her and take Fish-Man Island under his protection. It's the closest that Luffy has ever gotten to being a character in Goodfellas.
30. Luffy Allies With Law
And then, shortly after talking trash to Big Mom, Luffy teams up with Trafalgar Law in a plot to overthrow Kaido, another Emperor of the Sea. It's a real leap forward for Luffy. One day, you're just a kid from East Blue punching everyone that seems mean. The next, you're taking an active role in changing the power structure of the entire world. That's just how it is sometimes, though. As Logic once said, "Who can relate?"
31. Luffy Has Been "Picking Fights All Along"
Luffy knows he doesn't just tumble from one situation to another. He isn't just a poor guy caught up in the gambits of powerful evil forces. No, Luffy has definitely chosen to live a life where he will interfere with your best-laid plans if he feels inclined to. And if that includes a lot of fighting, well, so be it.
32. Luffy Reunites With Sabo
It's been pretty much non-stop action since the beginning of the Post Time Skip era, and that hasn't really allowed for a ton of emotional moments for Luffy. But when he reunites with Sabo in the coliseum and his scream comes out as a mix of happiness, confusion, and surprise, he finally gets one. Cry it out, buddy. We love ya.
33. Luffy And His Allies Head For Doflamingo
From orchestrating a breakout in Impel Down to creating a charge toward Doflamingo with all the allies he met in the tournament to win the Flame-Flame Fruit, Luffy has slowly gone from being the captain of a small crew on a ship with an animal head on the front to being the full-on leader of a Pirate Alliance. Luffy 2020 is what I say.
34. Luffy Goes Fourth Gear
Years after the reveal of Second and Third Gear, we get Fourth Gear, a power-up that even more freakishly transforms Luffy's body. It's not graceful, nor is it particularly beautiful to behold, but it gets the job done.
35. Luffy Beats Doflamingo
Doflamingo — a man that's been a thorn in the side of nearly everyone in the world for about 15 years of anime history — finally gets taken down. And still, it's only a stepping stone to Wano. Somehow, Eiichiro Oda creates these moments that seem like the biggest events in history, and yet, they're only just the beginning.
36. Luffy Refuses To Fight Sanji
Luffy knows Sanji is conflicted and not really a bad guy. And he's also aware of the fact that he'll be creating an even bigger issue if he fights back against his chef. So he just takes the kicks, hoping Sanji sees there's another way out of this. Sadly, it'll be a few episodes before he realizes that.
37. Luffy Waits For Sanji — And Then Punches — Sanji
Sanji finding Luffy because his captain's stomach is grumbling super loud is so cartoonish and lovely — because what is Sanji's role if not to feed his captain? Of course, Luffy enjoys Sanji's rain-soaked cookin' and then he punches Sanji for still being a twerp that won't admit what he really feels.
38. Luffy Clashes With Big Mom
Luffy stood beside Whitebeard, but this is his first real showdown with a Yonko. And it doesn't go very well. Big Mom is easily able to block him, which shows that, while Luffy has come a long way, he's still got a bit farther to go.
39. Luffy Places The Hat On Katakuri
Much like the previous covering of Sandersonia's shame, Luffy covers Katakuri's mouth with his hat after their duel. The two combatants fought and earned each other's respect. And so Luffy leaves Katakuri with his pride.
40. Luffy Knows He's Arrived In Wano Due To The Swords
That giant baboon is using a sword? Obviously this must be Wano, the land of samurai. That's Luffy logic at its most pure.
41. Luffy Promises Tama She Will Not Be Hungry Again
For the most part, heading to Wano seemed like a pretty impersonal act. The only reason he thought about going there in the first place was because Law seemed pretty confident it was a solid idea. But then he meets Tama and learns that she — along with most of the country — is starving. So his journey to take down Kaido gets some personal stakes. He's now shouldering the hopes of an entire group of people.
42. Luffy Is Beaten By Kaido
OK, so Round 1 didn't go so well. Luffy pummeled Kaido with everything he had and Kaido one-shotted him with a melee weapon attack. Luffy has to rethink his strategy and expand his move-set and maybe, with some luck, Round 2 will be a tad more even. I can't wait to see what Luffy moments we have in store when One Piece returns!
What is your favorite Luffy moment? Do any on this list stand out to you? Let me know in the comments!
Daniel Dockery is a Senior Staff Writer for Crunchyroll. Follow him on Twitter!
Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features!
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D-Views: Muppet Treasure Island
Hi, everyone! Welcome to another installment of D-Views, my on-going written review series for films that fall under the Disney umbrella, as well as those that were influenced by those films! For more reviews for movies like Mary Poppins, Treasure Planet, and The Prince of Egypt, please consult my “Disney Reviews” tag and, of course, if you enjoy this review or any of the others, please consider liking and reblogging!
Today’s film is one of my childhood favorites, starring a cast of some of my favorite people, as well as frogs, pigs, and even whatevers. This is Muppet Treasure Island! (Thank you for your votes, @the-alexandrian-alchemist, @silvvergears, @extremelybears, @livinlifelikeishould and @karalora!)
Ever since 1976, the characters of the Muppet Show have been American pop culture icons. The show itself won a total of 21 Emmy nominations and four television awards over its long run, and by 1990 its cast had also starred in several critically acclaimed films (The Muppet Movie, The Great Muppet Caper, and The Muppets Take Manhattan) and the very popular animated TV show Muppet Babies. And all of that wouldn’t have been possible without the Muppets’ creator, Jim Henson.
Like at the Walt Disney Company, the loss of their leader in 1990 hit Jim Henson Productions very hard. One silver lining, however, is that just like with Walt Disney, Jim Henson was memorialized not just by the characters he created, but by his many achievements and the many friendships he’d made in life. He received a Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame alongside Kermit the Frog; was inducted into the Television Hall of Fame; earned a memorial in his hometown Hyattsville, Maryland; was posthumously named a Disney Legend; was the focus of the heartfelt TV special The Muppets Celebrate Jim Henson; and was laid to rest with two formal funeral services complete with performances of some of his favorite songs. And just like the Walt Disney Company, even after the death of someone who meant so much to them, Jim Henson Productions got back up and promised to do more in the memory of their lost leader. Jim’s son Brian Henson took the reins and directed the Disney-co-produced Christmas movie The Muppet Christmas Carol in 1992, before he moved on to their next project and today’s subject, Muppet Treasure Island.
So, here’s the thing -- I have a LOT of nostalgia for this movie. I will be upfront about that. But even with that acknowledged, I was sort of stunned when I found out how lukewarm the reaction to this movie was, when it was released in theaters. Sure, I knew it hadn’t broken the bank, but even if it earned about $34 million worldwide, it received no honors or awards, only hit third at the box office opening weekend behind the movies Broken Arrow and Happy Gilmore, and even now only boasts an average 73% rating at Rotten Tomatoes. Critics at the time criticized how it was more “Treasure Island” than “Muppet”, with Roger Ebert calling it “less cleverly written” and Gene Siskel even more coldly deeming it “boring.” Although I’ll readily acknowledge that reading those reactions makes me want to run outside and scream “FUCK YOU, GENE SISKEL” at the top of my lungs, I promise to give a more rational review of this movie instead, one hopefully that acknowledges any possible shortcomings, but also will celebrate this film and how completely NOT boring it is.
One of the best things about this movie hits us in the face right off the bat -- the music, written by scoring giant Hans Zimmer and Nick Glennie-Smith. As much as I enjoy a lot of Muppet musicals, I attest that Muppet Treasure Island has the most cohesive score overall of any Muppet production. The Muppets were always creatures of the short, sweet vignette -- of the variety show -- of many disparate pieces sewn loosely together into a whole like a patchwork quilt. Even though The Muppet Christmas Carol’s soundtrack comes very close in its cohesion and I would say The Muppets (2011) -- my personal favorite Muppet movie -- is truer to the spirit of the Muppet Show in its music while also paying tribute to old-fashioned movie musicals, Muppet Treasure Island just paints a full-bodied picture from the off-set, building on refrains that return and morph over the course of the picture. From the very beginning, we get that this venture is NOT a standard Muppet movie. Like The Muppet Christmas Carol, the Muppets’ humor will only be part of the story told -- in TMCC, it takes a backseat to sincere emotions like love and redemption, while here in MTI, it takes a backseat to adventure and swashbuckling action.
The score also seamlessly flows into our first song, “Shiver My Timbers,” which just screams “pirate!” I’ve loved pirates ever since I was a little kid, and Muppet Treasure Island was one of the main reasons why. I was okay with Peter Pan, but Muppet Treasure Island was what really got me excited about pirates. They were rough, ruthless, and dangerous, but it was exciting to face off against them in an epic musical adventure, even if your only weapons were a couple of artfully thrown starfish. In the 90′s, pirate films weren’t really “in” -- it wouldn’t be until 2003 with the release of Pirates of the Caribbean that they became popular again -- but I think Muppet Treasure Island, through its music, really embraces the fun, action-packed thrills that Disney would later capitalize on in the Pirates films.
After our prologue, we meet Billy Bones (played by the perfectly cast Billy Connolly) and, of course, our hero, Jim Hawkins, played by newcomer Kevin Bishop. Kevin was the very first of a hundred kids who showed up for the audition to meet the casting agents, and he was selected for the part then and there. Sadly post-Muppets he moved on to stage and television, but for what it’s worth, I quite like Kevin in the role of Jim. He’s distinctly depicted as a boy, complete with a pre-puberty “boy soprano” singing voice (which I acknowledge is an acquired taste, but I personally enjoy), but that characterization only serves to accent how large of an arc he goes through over the course of the film. He starts off as smart, sincere, honest, and dreamy, but also very innocent and trusting, and over the course of the story, he learns to ground himself in who he is and what he believes in, to the point where he has to sever ties with someone he once considered a friend and mentor. Accompanying Jim in his journey are Gonzo and Rizzo, who largely serve as comic relief but do still serve as good friends and companions to Jim, as evident by the three characters’ “I Want” song, “Something Better.” Yes, Gonzo and Rizzo are sidekicks, but they’re still distinct personalities that bounce well off each other and ��straight-man” Jim. Originally the filmmakers had considered simply having Gonzo and Rizzo being two characters called “Jim” and “Hawkins” respectively (splitting the part in two, not unlike what they did with Statler and Waldorf in The Muppet Christmas Carol), but due to concerns that the choice would result in a lack of heart in the finished product, that idea was scrapped. I think it ultimately was the better decision to leave the drama to the humans -- it’s not that the Muppets can’t conjure sincere emotion (just look at “Pictures in my Head” or “Man or Muppet”), but I still think having any of the existing Muppets fulfill the “coming of age” narrative the original Jim Hawkins goes through would’ve been a bit of a stretch. Even in The Muppet Christmas Carol or non-Muppet-show Jim Henson production Labyrinth, the main characters with a story arc are played by human actors who are able to ground the picture despite the cast of colorful, irreverent characters.
One of the main criticisms that critics of the time lobbed at this movie is that it feels more “Treasure Island” than “Muppet”, and in a way it’s a decent point, if not phrased very badly. Unlike in other Muppet projects, the humor plays second fiddle to the plot and the characters are not the characters we know from the Muppet Show with their Muppet Show backstories and consciousness. In The Muppet Christmas Carol, the film could very easily be seen as a “production” being put on by the Muppets, even if it’s never overtly stated as such, thanks to Gonzo (as Charles Dickens) constantly breaking the fourth wall. In Muppet Treasure Island, however, Gonzo and Rizzo have their own non-Muppet-show history as friends of Jim Hawkins way before ever meeting the other Muppets like Kermit and Sam the Eagle, and Kermit and Miss Piggy have a whole soap-opera romance that involves a wedding and getting marooned by pirates (we’ll get to that later). So yes, this is more “Treasure Island,” but it’s not less “Muppet” -- it’s less “Muppet Show.” These Muppets have different histories, but they’re the same characters despite this. Gonzo is an eccentric thrill-seeker -- Rizzo is a cowardly cynic -- Kermit is a soft-spoken pacifist -- Fozzie is a lovable dimwit -- Piggy is a self-centered diva. Think of Muppet Treasure Island as a Muppet AU fanfiction -- these may not be exactly the characters you know, and yet...they are! They’re the exact same big personalities with the same quirks, strengths, and weaknesses, just in an alternate universe. And honestly, I think it’s really cool, to see these sorts of characters so exclusively used for comedy in a world that’s not flat-out comedic -- one that’s kind of dirty and rough around the edges, with swashbuckling action and real danger around every corner.
The nice thing is that although yes, the comedy isn’t the central focus anymore, there is still really good humor in this film, a lot of it thanks to the shift in tone. There’s just something so very, very funny to me about Billy Bones’s death scene being followed up by Rizzo, Gonzo, and Jim just flat-out freaking out and dashing out of the room screaming like stupid kids, or the tense action scene where the pirates storm into the inn being punctuated by Rizzo trying to help Gonzo load the gun, only to spill the bag of bullets, or the epic entrance of the illustrious Captain Smollett’s carriage ending with the tall, solemn coachman stepping aside to reveal the Captain himself, played by Kermit the Frog. I think it plays into the ideas of subverting expectations and building up a punchline properly before delivering the joke -- as each scene is built up, we’re left constantly unsure if the film’s going to play things straight or just be completely irreverent, and the contrast is what can make a joke much funnier than in a purely, solely humorous scenario. There are a few points where the contrast can become a bit labored, but I laugh so much more during this movie that I ever have watching my favorite reruns of the Muppet Show, no matter how much I enjoy them. It’s something that, again, the Pirates of the Caribbean films would capitalize on much later. (Too bad they couldn’t incorporate that humor into any catchy musical numbers! Disney, where’s my Pirates of the Caribbean musical?)
Aha, and now we come to the brightest of the shining stars in this film -- our villain, Long John Silver, played by the amazing Tim Curry. I’m sorry, it’s an incontrovertible truth that Curry is a unique, magical ingredient that, when added to any movie, just elevates the cinematic dish to a whole new level and leaves you drooling for one more scene with him. I remember someone once saying that Curry is sort of like a Muppet in human skin thanks to his outrageous, yet likable acting, and...yeah, it makes it so that he fits perfectly in this movie, where he has to interact so closely with the Muppets. The nice thing is, though, that he also has a lot of chemistry with his human co-star Kevin Bishop, to the extent that you sincerely feel for the relationship that forms between Jim and Silver even if you know Silver’s intentions from the start. I particularly like their exchange in the ridiculously catchy “Sailing for Adventure,” as well as their scene at the front of the ship where they discuss their fathers and the stars.
Just as the adventure is getting going, however, it stops dead with the wind’s abandonment of the Hispaniola. Out of nowhere, the ship breaks out into the most ridiculous, most “Muppet” of all of the musical numbers, “Cabin Fever.” The song was one of my favorite parts when I was little and it’s always made me laugh, but it’s definitely the biggest detour of the movie that up until that point lived in its own pirate-centric world. It’s a very short-lived detour and as I said, it’s ridiculously funny, but it doesn’t have any bearing on the plot and I could see how people might find it kind of pointless, particularly since it doesn’t even feature three of our main characters, Jim, Silver, or Smollett. One other critique I will give the film is that some of the effects nowadays don’t look very real, like the Hispaniola being composited over still matte paintings -- there are points where the production values remind me a bit of the old Wishbone TV series, where they have to angle the shot just so or get creative just to try to make the ship look as big as it should be. But honestly, there were points where Wishbone impressed me with those same sorts of layering and green-screen effects despite its limited budget, and those cheaper effects don’t look tacky or out-of-place, so I personally don’t mind them that much.
Because this is a Muppet movie, it’s unsurprising that our Mr. Arrow (played by Sam the Eagle) isn’t really killed, instead just being tricked off of the ship by a manipulative Silver, but it says something that, even with that softened plot turn, the stakes are not completely dismantled. We still see the pirates as a legitimate threat when they kidnap Jim and take over the Hispaniola, even when they burst into song. Tim Curry’s “only number,” “A Professional Pirate,” is a perfect expression of his expert, charming showmanship, which in my mind truly can’t be matched by any other performer in Hollywood, past or present. No one gives a performance like Tim Curry. It makes it so that even when I was a bratty kid getting irritated about Silver calling privateer Sir Francis Drake a pirate and using “buccaneer” as a synonym for “pirate,” I would sing this song at the top of my lungs, trying to even reach 75% of the energy Curry put into his vocals.
At long last, Miss Piggy makes her grand debut as “Queen Boom Sha-Kal-a-Kal,” a.k.a. Benjamina Gunn. Although the diva doesn’t end up getting much screentime, she certainly gets a grand entrance, complete with an elephant steed decorated with flowers and a full musical number complete with a tribal chant and ethereal vocalizing. And true to form, when she lays eyes on her one true love, Kermit...she smacks him so hard that he’s thrown backwards off his feet and into a gong. What’s particularly interesting about Piggy in this movie is that although she and Fozzie are voiced by Frank Oz as always, both she and Fozzie were actually puppeted by Kevin Clash, as Oz was unavailable during this film’s production, and Oz’s vocals for both characters were added in post-production. Despite the difference in puppeteer, however, both characters are just as likable as ever -- I’d honestly had no clue that they weren’t performed by the same person! The film even got to use the full-bodied remote-controlled puppets for Kermit and Piggy for the love duet “Love Led Us Here,” which is kicked off by an Evita joke I never got as a kid but as an adult makes me grin like a friggin’ idiot. Fortunately the duet is inter-cut with Silver and the pirates finding the treasure, rather than it being chock-full of romantic flashbacks or prolonged looks between the two lovebirds, giving it a lighter tone than it would’ve had otherwise.
With a much reduced crew comprised only of Rizzo, Gonzo, Squire Trelawney, Dr. Honeydew, Beaker, and the newly returned Mr. Arrow, Jim comes to Benjamina and Smollett’s rescue and returns to Treasure Island to face Silver and the pirates. The action scene is full of humor, but because of the world established in the rest of the film, I would argue it still has stakes. The blows still hurt and there’s still a threat of defeat and danger, most notably when Long John Silver prepares to fight. Even if you don’t think the Muppets are going to die persay, you still feel the suspense in wanting to see what’s going to happen next. And when Silver surrenders, he himself can see the real treasure Jim found on his adventure -- a family...a group of people Muppets who will support him and encourage the very best in him.
Silver’s escape scene is a beautifully heart-wrenching scene -- one that could only have been earned by two excellent performances over the course of the film by Kevin Bishop and Tim Curry. Even though both Silver and Jim know that they’re different people and they could never walk the same path, it doesn’t mean that they don’t still greatly esteem and care about each other. In Jim’s case, it’s especially difficult, given that in parting ways with Silver, he has to cut loose of a very poor potential father figure who would’ve only dragged him down in the long run, but who was so likable in his own damaged way. It proves to be a very bittersweet scene sprinkled into a very happy, cheerful ending, complete with the chipper island-inspired end credits bop “Love Power.”
Muppet Treasure Island is -- in my opinion, at least -- one of the best Muppet movies ever made. It broke away from quite a few Muppet conventions, like the characters breaking the fourth wall and being aware of themselves being in a movie or TV show, and embraced a much less humorous tone in both its writing and cinematography. Yes, it reimagined a classic book like The Muppet Christmas Carol did, but this movie took the next step, embracing the world of the original novel as well as the set-up and immersing the Muppets’ cast of characters in it. Although I can see why some people would be more partial to the original Muppet movie formula and love it a lot myself, I really, really respect Brian Henson and the rest of this film’s crew for taking the Muppets in such a different direction. It was an entertaining, action-packed, funny pirate movie before those sorts of movies became popular again, and it remains my favorite “pirate” movie of all time, as well as my personal favorite incarnation of the Treasure Island story (barely beating out Treasure Planet). I know childhood nostalgia can play a role in what media can give you joy as an adult, but I truly don’t think it’s the only factor here -- it’s also just a really good movie, and I can only hope that more people will consider giving it a chance and have just as much fun Sailing for Adventure as I did!
#d-views#disney reviews#muppet treasure island#the muppets#reviews#opinion#analysis#oh boy here i go#brian henson#tim curry#kevin bishop#billy connolly
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What do you think the difference would be in a TMNT/OP fic with different collections of turtles?
oooooooo okay so I should be getting ready for class tomorrow but you have 100% captured me I’m so invested in this
mainly I know 2003, 2012, and Rise - well, at least, they’re my favourites and have the most distinct characterisation tbh bc they’re long-running series - SO I’ll do those guys :DD
THIS GOT LONG (because of course it did, I’ve never made a short post in my LIFE) SO FIRST:
the main difference in fic would be tone!!!!!!!! The turtles are all really affected by the shows they come from so there’d be big differences in how they react to the new situation. Combining OP and 2018, they’re both such loud and bright shows that writing them sad would be kinda….disatisfactory to a reader. 2012 is the one where you could get kinda dark, and go down the genetic experiment and “oh wow these kids need a therapist” and Luffy being >:T wtf why are your lives so Fucked Up route, and 2003 would be hilariously awkward because they’re technically all in the same age range but they act so different wheezes
Second!!! Fun character analysis and Shenanigans under the readmore.
2003
Probably the most responsible on this list, they’re like??? tbh, barely teenagers?? Or at the very least, 18 or 19, and they can be air-heads but 2003 goes feet-first into the whole plot and character and Everything Happens. I mean, literally in season one there’s this whole subplot about how you define monsters and genetic testing and Wild shit like that so they feel Way more adult than the Strawhats get at times. Even though One Piece covers some dark topics it….the characters - the strawhats, in particular, is what I mean - don’t feel like adults the same way the 2003 turtles do. 2003 also doesn’t feel as dark as 2012 gets sometimes, but I feel 2012 is also because they seem really young, and in 2003 at least they get to process their trauma. 2012…..kinda beats them up a lot akhsdg pft.
Sticking them with the Strawhats would be !! Honestly really funny? I feel Mikey would get along with them really well - in every iteration he’s very good at going with the flow, and hey, pirates? and they’re nice? and cool powers? - he’d have the time of his life. Donnie would try and figure out What Was Going On (as the resident “please fix this in case it’s dangerous” guy, that’s probably what his role would Often be) but I can see him being easily distracted by Franky and the whole devil fruits thing. GOD him and Franky is a thought and a half omfg. The level of tech in One Piece is so different when compared to the modern world, and it operates on rules but like, rules that are just ever so slightly different.
Raph would be in debt Immediately. Mainly bc Nami’s manipulative like that but also because he’s just………..Like That. He’d be rude and insulting and if the strawhats were helping them out he’d be the team’s voice of reason. Or, distrust, I suppose. The one who hangs back, who’s prickly, who’s the last to offer his trust because his family needs him to be uncompromised, just in case. I think he and Zoro would clash for a bit, not like, in words but just in gestures, until the crew + turtles had been through their adventures, and gotten to the end of Whatever fic was being written, and then they’d be friends. Not best buds but like, healthy respect for each other.
Leo……….absolutely does Not understand why Luffy is leader. It’s like making Mikey the boss; it doesn’t make sense to him, because Luffy is too trusting and he’s strong but strength doesn’t make a good leader, and in 2003 Leo’s kind of a pushover so he’d stay on the sidelines and watch with Raph. But, as everyone knows, Luffy’s magnetism is Pretty Hard To Deny, and the crew’s respect for him does a lot to show to Leo that he may be missing something but that he doesn’t have to understand.
2012
I always……..feel so bad for TMNT2012 //weeps They’re just kids and they get put through so much like wow I’m only at season two but from spoilers there’s like?? their dad keeps DYING and being bought back to life???/ THAT’S GOTTA FUCK YOU UP!!! Plus all of them have all these different insecurities and they’re kinda mean to each other (Raph….has only given a proper apology for being a dick once so far, and I’m like. mid-way through season two. I’m sorry if this makes me mikey kin @@zali but pLEASE I cannot stand this LET THEM BE NICE TO EACH OTHER ;A; Like they’re still obviously a family but gosh they’re– so prickly)
Honestly depending on how the Strawhats meet them, like holy shit :o they might be Enemies. In 2003 I feel like they’ve been through enough to try and de-escalate a situation first, but 2012 are so Paranoid that unless they had April with them they’d be like WELP this is another mind-control alternate dimension thing, time to ninja vanish. And sure, after they ended up on whatever quest they needed to go on, Luffy would be fascinated by them (2012 definitely pushes the limits of what you can Actually do, in terms of hiding and shit, but I think that makes it fun !!) but I feel the turtles would be pretty paranoid at first. Mikey & Donnie would be the first two to be dragged out of their shells (snickers) because Donnie would be super curious (and also…probably kinda aggravated and confused) about how the one piece world rules work, and Mikey because…friends!! They already have a reindeer mutant on the crew, they’re obviously cool with mutants :D
akhsdg okay I mention that 2003 would hang back and assess Luffy’s leadership still but like 2012 would be such a dick. He never seems to learn the lesson that people have different strengths and different ways of doing things >:T and watching Luffy lead would drive him crazy. I bet he’d try and make plans and be all structured and in control and Luffy would wreck things and/or the strawhats would be like “lol no lmao, you’re not the captain”. Even if he did have a good plan, like….the Strawhats rarely follow plans if Luffy says they’re doing something different snickers. I feel a major part of this could just a nice subplot line of Leo learning to Chill and also like………give the 2012 a fun adventure I’m begging you sobs. Do a Long Long Island filler arc or smth, where it’s dumb and silly and barely dangerous because they’re all competent af.
Also: Mikey constantly trying to find a devil fruit because “dudes, it’s probably not gonna apply when we go back home and think about how SICK superpowers would be!!!!!!!!”
He does not get one, to his disappointment.
2018
These guys are IDIOTS and would fit in with Luffy’s brand of chaos p e r f e c t l y
Okay so yeeeeah I’m probably biased because I think Rise may be my favourite (the family dynamics!! the character designs!! the animation!!! the stupid jokes!!! the sudden flashes of deeper plot!!!!!!!!) BUT. No-one can argue with me that Rise turtles are chaotic as fuck and they’d have the time of their LIVES with Luffy’s crew. Raph would fall in love with Chopper (Chopper would be terrified of him, continuing the terribly sad trend of Raph being Bad With Animals), Donnie would go wild glitter-eyed over the devil fruits and technology and immediately try and do a million mad scientist experiments (and look. SMILES are fucked up. But this boii would totally try and make one/figure out how they worked). He’s….a mad genius and maybe a little bit evil.
Leo would either drive Sanji crazy or be INSTANTLY adopted and taught how to be “cool”, but I can also see Sanji and Zoro lowkey fighting over him SNICKERS. Because Leo has a sword so he’s obviously Zoro’s, but he’s suave and likes fashion so he MUST be Sanji’s, and it’s not an argument persay, until Leo says he thinks both of them are cool and then it’s a battle to the death.
(The end of leo’s sentence was “not as cool as me tho ;P” only they didn’t notice that bit.)
April would absolutely fall in love with Robin. And also Nami?? But I feel mainly Robin like Oh Man Robin is so cool and both of them are hypercompetent??? April’s like teach me how to be a badass assassin and Robin smiles and laughs and absolutely does.
Mikey’s so loud that he almost terrifies Usopp, and terrifying Usopp is kinda a no-no in Luffy’s book, but he likes these guys and Mikey’s just excited to have an artist friend and so both of them bounce around the ship like ping pong balls.
There is………yeah. A lot of paint covering the Sunny after they’re through. I can’t decide if Franky would cry or laugh but I know one (1) single drop of paint got on Nami’s tangerines and she Banished them. Rise turtles probably have a really good time and the crew figures out they’re basically children really quick and make sure nothing bad happens to them. Leo promises to try and get better at portal-making so they can come visit New York sometime, and everyone is like “what the fuck is new york??” at the same time as Donnie says HEY WAIT, I THINK WE’RE ON AN ALTERNATE DIMENSION and they get teleported home :DD
THANKS FOR LETTING ME SPILL ALL MY TURTLE FEELINGS EVERYWHERE
#tmnt#rottmnt#tmnt 2003#tmnt 2012#one piece#missjenca#ask aussie#bip bop nari drops#wow I love combining my special interest s aljshdg //BLUSHES#so anyway HERE'S MULTIPLE PARAGRAPHS OF POTENTIAL FIC THEMES lajkhsdf sweats pft#I'm..........so weak pft
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My Star Wars Top 10 of 2018
This year I fell massively in love with Star Wars, learned more about a galaxy far, far away that I ever expected and started this blog, first to liveblog Star Wars Rebels, and later to share my thoughts on whatever new (and old!) Star Wars media I came across. In honor of what, in my mind, was a really fun year for Star Wars, I wanted to share my top 10 list of my favorite Star Wars things that came out this year, across different kinds of media. Read more because it’s really long :P
Honorable Mention: Flight of the Falcon multimedia series (by multiple authors and artists)
Okay, if I’m honest, this gets honorable mention spot, mostly because I felt like putting it in top 10 when it’s really a BUNCH of comics and books would be totally cheating :P One of the more fun things to come out of Solo: A Star Wars Story, this series of loosely connected books and comics whose main connecting factor is the Millennium Falcon (and Bazine Netal’s hunt for it!) is an absolute joy. Cavan Scott knocks it out of the park with the ridiculously fun Choose Your Destiny: A Luke and Leia Adventure. IDW Comics does what’s it does best by bringing together some exciting and unexpected pairs of characters for the last couple months of Star Wars Adventures. In Lando’s Luck Justina Ireland gave us the coolest darn Princess in Star Wars since Leia, Rinetta Gan. And they’re not even done yet, with 2 more comics and Pirate’s Price left to go!
10. Star Wars: Scum and Villainy: Case Files on the Galaxy’s Most Notorious by Pablo Hidalgo
What an awesome and fun book! So much great art, and Pablo Hidalgo always gives 100% with his work. It’s such a creative concept, following Tan Divo and and his descendants, as they report on the criminals and rebels of their day. I completely geeked out over how it gave soooo much neat new information about characters and organizations from ALL OVER the Star Wars universe. It’s an absolute blast!
9. Solo: A Star Wars Story: Tales from Vandor by Jason Fry
This book is AMAZING. Even among the “replica journal” style books that Studio Fun puts out, it stands out as super unique, written from the point of view of the Midnight, the bartender at The Lodge on Vandor (where Han meets Lando), as if he is telling the story to a guest. It’s such a fun outsider’s point of view of Han and the other characters of Solo. The best part though, is the parts of the book that are just a shameless love letter to Star Wars Legends, with nods to stuff like The Wookiee Storybook, LEGO Star Wars: The Padawan Menace and several novels. Jason Fry’s love for the franchise really shines through.
8. Star Wars: Poe Dameron by Charles Soule and penciller Angel Unzueta
This year we said a bittersweet goodbye to Marvel’s monthly Star Wars: Poe Dameron and goodness gracious it was good. Between the Legend Found arc that was to be the original ending and the final The Awakening arc, where Black Squadron is reunited after The Last Jedi, this comic really touched my heart. The last couple pages of issues 25 and 31 still make me cry. :’)
7. Solo: A Star Wars Story directed by Ron Howard and screenplay by Lawrence and Jon Kasdan
THIS MOVIE IS CRIMINALLY UNDERRATED AND I’M MAD AT EVERYONE WHO LET IT FLOP. I’ll admit I wasn’t exactly desperate for a Han Solo Backstory Movie, but Solo was just AWESOME. Just some good, raw, Star Wars-y fun that you can’t help but smile the whole way through. It might not be groundbreaking, but it introduced some super cool characters in L3-37, Qi’ra and Enfys Nest, gave us Maul’s grand triumphant return to the public at large and has INCREDIBLY charming performances by Alden Ehrenreich and Donald Glover as the Han and Lando we all come to love.
6. The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! by Tom Angleberger
If Solo, is good, this kid’s book written to accompany it is even better. I mean, Chewbacca meets K-2SO meets Tooka cats meets teenage bounty hunter/librarian?? On a planet with scary monsters and a spooky evil Force user? Also Cassian is there?? And the daughter of This Funny Hat Dude from Return of the Jedi? Hell yeah!!!!!
The book is hysterical, ridiculously fun and I can’t recommend it enough. I just have to say if you do get it, try and grab the audiobook it’s got a full cast of voices for the main characters including Marc Thompson giving his best Shyriiwook as Chewbacca. I laughed so hard I cried at the narration and a K-2SO’s lines done out loud. You won’t regret it!
5. Star Wars: Women of the Galaxy by Amy Ratcliffe and eighteen awesome artists!
THIS is one of the coolest Star Wars books out there and a celebration of all the women we know and love (and sometimes hate) in a galaxy far, far away. It’s such a wonderful collaboration, created by all women (& non-binary) artists and author. I love that it’s got characters from practically everything—movies, books, comics, video games, you name it! We even got to see characters like Jas Emari for the first time which makes me SO HAPPY. it’s one of the books I come back to all the time just to flip through it and enjoy the illustrations.
4. Star Wars Resistance created by Dave Filoni and executive produced by Athena Yvette Portillo, Justin Ridge, and Brandon Auman
I LOVE RESISTANCE SO MUCH!! I didn’t quiiite know what to expect with the new animated series, but was super excited and it hasn’t disappointed one bit. It’s such a fun show and really enjoyable to have a Star Wars show that is almost just ‘slice of life’ compared to the others. The animation is so cool to me and the characters really cute. I’m ridiculously charmed by all of them, especially our main man Kazuda Xiono and really hyped to see where these characters go. It’s more happy and fun than anything, but I know it will break my heart to pieces soon enough (KAZUDA XIONO. HOME PLANET: HOSNIAN PRIME). I hope more people give it a chance because it really is awesome!
3. Star Wars Adventures: Tales from Vader's Castle by Cavan Scott and various artists
LET THIS BE MY LOVE LETTER TO CAVAN SCOTT AND ALL THE COOL AND AWESOME STUFF HE’S DONE WITH THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE!! I was soooo excited when these came out because it’s such an AWESOME idea, I mean? Star Wars Horror story one-shots connected by a wider plot??? YES PLEASE AND THANK YOU. Doubly so when they star Lina Graf, of the Adventures in Wild Space series by Cavan Scott and Tom Huddleston. I was soooo excited to see her again and it’s amazing to see how she’s grown from a young kid to a brave and capable pilot and Commander in the Rebellion.
Then the individual stories are just awesome. It was a joy to see Kanan and Hera back together again after Rebels (or, well, pre-Rebels). The Dooku story was just amazing and such an enthusiastic tribute to Christopher Lee as Dracula. The Frozen inspired Han and Chewie story was also pretty great and I LOVE that it referenced the events of The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! And, my personal favorite story, the spooky ewok story featuring a young Chief Chirpa and Logray was brilliant and I enjoyed getting a closer first-hand look at ewoks (something we don’t have much of, at least in canon!). All in all just an absolute masterpiece in my book and a great reminder of why IDW Comics’ Star Wars stuff has been so freaking awesome.
2. Join the Resistance: Attack on Starkiller Base by Ben Blacker and Ben Acker and illustrated by Annie Wu
I’M BACK AT IT YELLING ABOUT WHY MORE PEOPLE NEED TO CARE ABOUT THESE WONDERFUL, CHARMING LITTLE KIDS’ BOOKS!! This was such a perfect end to the J-Squadron kids’ story. To me, this series is such a hidden gem and I really hope more people give it a chance. It was wonderful how all the characters’ stories closed out. I loved seeing Jo finally openly defy his parents, Mattis putting his faith in the Force and his friends, the return of Klimo, AG-90 and Dec fighting as brothers but growing stronger for it, and Lorica becoming the hero everybody thought she was. There’s so many fun cameos, from Rey, to Hux to Poe and Black Squadron, with the backdrop of the actual climactic battle in The Force Awakens.
And, one thing I really want to talk about that I love, is how the book (in tandem with the first two) give us the first gay character in a Star Wars kids book, with Dec Hansen. I wish they could’ve said it a bit more explicitly, but we actually got the kid and his friends talking about it in the books? And, with most of the LGBT characters falling more on the “scum and villainy” circles of the galaxy, it’s so refreshing to see a brave and unambiguously heroic gay teenage starfighter pilot trainee. Like, holy shit that actually happened!!!! ANYWAYS READ THIS SERIES I LOVE THEM AND YOU SHOULD TOO.
Oh, also, Annie Wu’s illustrations are AWESOME and I hope she does more Star Wars stuff (Pirate’s Price, out in a week!)
1. Star Wars Rebels created by Dave Filoni, Simon Kinberg and Carrie Beck
I don’t think there’s way I could place anything but Rebels at #1. This show changed my life in so many ways and I’m just. ridiculously thankful it exists. without Rebels, I wouldn’t have this blog, I wouldn’t be up to my ears obsessed with Star Wars and I there’s so many friends I wouldn’t have either. It’s touched my heart in a way that.... gosh I don’t know if I can even think about anything that resonates with me quite in the way Star Wars Rebels has. Pretty sure most if not all of my followers have seen Rebels, haha, but if you haven’t. You won’t regret it. Well, you might. It hurts. I hate to say, but it does. But even if the end destination leaves you heartbroken and uh prone to randomly bursting into tears about it, you will never regret the journey. Everything I learned and experienced with Ezra, Kanan, Hera, Sabine, Zeb and Chopper is beyond precious to me and I’m thankful it exists because it made my year in so many ways.
#star wars rebels#star wars resistance#solo a star wars story#the mighty chewbacca in the forest of fear#join the resistance#tales from vader's castle#star wars: women of the galaxy#star wars poe dameron#tales from vandor#star wars: scum and villainy#flight of the falcon#star wars
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Kayla’s Top Ten Reads of 2017
I read a total of 36 books this year. Which was a goal I set out to achieve and I did. I’m elated that I managed to get through this year with so many awesome reads, a few of which I’ll share with you now. This will also be a long post so I’m putting it under the cut.
Number 10: We Were Liars by E. Lockhart
This book was amazing, it had so may twists and shifts in the storyline, but not in the ‘i don’t get what’s happening’ vibe. The only thing is I literally cannot say a single thing about this book without spoiling something about it. What I can manage to say is this. Our narrator Cadence suffers migraines. She does not suffer fools. (I stole that from the book).
Number 9: The Sun is Also a Star by Nicola Yoon
What an amazing story about chance and fate. I loved this book so much. Another one I can’t go too much into without possibly spoiling things. Except Natasha is about 12 hours from being deported back to Jamaica and Daniel has a potential future riding interview to get to. Both want completely different things from the day, and it’s interesting to see what wins out.
Number 8: The You I’ve Never Known by Ellen Hopkins
Gonna come right out and say I literally can’t stress this enough. Do not read the synopsis for this book. It spoils a major plot point, and I think it’s best going into the story without knowing it. That being said I love Ellen Hopkins and I LOVED this book. It’s probably one of my favorites of hers of all time.
Number 7: Of Fire and Stars by Audrey Coulthurst
Let me start by saying how much I am not actually talking about any other these books. But basically with this one you’ve got Princess Denna who has some forbidden fire magic, especially in the kingdom of her betrothed prince. Then things get even more fun for Denna when she meets the kingdom’s princess, Mare, and totally falls for her. Yes two beautiful princesses falling in love. That and magic is what sold me on this book. And it should sell you too.
Number 6: We Are Okay by Nina LaCour
Except I was not okay after reading this book. Not okay at all. In fact I pretty much cried through a good 2/3 of this entire book and I read it in a day. “You go through life thinking there’s so much you need… Until you leave with only your phone, your wallet, and a picture of your mother.” This drew me in, it pulled and tugged until I was wrapped up in Marin’s world and watching how everything spun out. It’s such a good read and I highly recommend it.
Number 5: Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia
I literally don’t think I’ve ever read something that encapsulates fandom and anxiety in such a powerful way. This book was beautifully executed and I cannot begin to describe how great it is.
Number 4: The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue
Do you like adventure novels? Do you like Grand Tours of England? Do you like bisexual main characters and the idiotic things they do for love? Please read this book.
Number 3: Six of Crow Duology
Am I cheating putting these two together at number 3? I mean I don’t feel like I am considering it’s the same characters in the same story. What can I say about Six of Crows without spoiling everything? This is a heist novel. Our ragtag band of crooks and misfits must work together in order to achieve riches beyond their wildest dreams and the impossible of impossible endeavors. Trust me you want to join Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Nina, Mattias, and Wylan. You do, you just might not know it yet.
Number 2: This Savage Song by Victoria Schwab
Words cannot describe how pissed at myself I am that I still have yet to finish this duology. Because yes there’s one more book to go, and here I am at the cusp of 2018′s rise and have yet to find out what happens with Kate and August. Am I a masochist? Am I broke? Am I too afraid to see how it comes to an end? All of the above? Okay but for real I listened to the audio book for this one, and let me tell you. DAMN. It delivers. There’s a reason this one is sitting at number 2 on this list when I have yet to complete the series. And that’s because of the way the final chapter ended. I can still hear the words echoed through my mind.
This book has monsters, both human and not, and it has heart. Please read these books. But if you read Our Dark Duet before me and then spoil it I will kick you so flipping hard.
And out number one book of the year goes too…..
Wayfarer by Alexandra Bracken
Okay a stunning conclusion to the best book I read in 2016, Wayfarer has all the angst and pull of Passenger with even more of the gut wrenching. I can’t say anything else this book is a sequel. I can say if you haven’t read Passenger you should. There’s time travel, pirates, treasure hunting, and enough family drama to last you a millennium.
So there is is my top 10 reads of 2017. If you’ve read any of these books and want to completely freak out about them with me, please my box is ALWAYS open.
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The Long Way Home (4/10)
On to Chapter 4! I'm so pleased that so many of you seem to be enjoying this story, and I deeply appreciate the time you've taken to reblog it, leave comments, and tell your friends about it! This really isn't half the fun without you. Hugs.
As always, thanks to my beta, @captainstudmuffin, and to @lifeinahole27, @clockadile, and @ladyciaramiggles for their additional feedback. Additional thanks to my wonderful CSBB artists, @waiting-for-autumn and @giraffes-ride-swordfishes for providing some gorgeous artwork to accompany this fic! Links to their illustrations of certain scenes (*) will be in the text - go show them some love!
Find it on AO3. Nautical term glossary here.
Missed a chapter? Get caught up here.
Summary: After an unnaturally long life fraught with personal tragedy, Killian Jones has become known throughout the realms as the infamous Captain Hook, an opportunistic ne’er-do-well and one of the most formidable pirates to ride the waves. When he crosses paths with a mysterious young woman with no memory of who she is or how she arrived there, he recognizes the chance to claim a monetary reward that will constitute his biggest score yet. But a journey across the world to get her home leads to a series of adventures that reveal that her value lies in far more than gold and jewels. A Captain Swan Anastasia AU - sort of. (Captain Swan Enchanted Forest AU. Romance, Adventure, & Eventual Smut. Rated E.)
Warning: Brief but graphic depictions of violence, peripheral character death, and smut.
Steel whispers as Emma pulls a cutlass from a rack of swords in the Jolly’s armory and draws it from the scabbard to examine it with a narrowed eye aimed down the edge of the blade.
Hook watches her with amusement, leaned against one wall with his arms and legs crossed. She’s wearing her hair up for the first time today, woven with a few thick braids and pulled back into a ponytail that’s already been touched by humidity and the morning breeze, and there’s something very wild and pretty about it. “I assure you they’re all good swords, Swan,” he promises. “I select them myself.”
“Who says I’m not more discerning than you?” she quips, the corner of her lips pulling upward until one of her dimples appears. She meets his incredulous grin with a chuckle. “Kidding.”
He laughs richly. Glorious creature.
She moves on to a different, slightly more slender sword and looks it over before rotating it with a few turns of her wrist, the blade arcing gracefully through the air. Emma hums with satisfaction, admiring the clean lines of the wire-wrapped grip. “I like this one.”
Hook nods. “Very well.”
The blade hisses back into its sheath, and she flashes him an appreciative smile as he hands over a spare sword belt. Standing back, he watches her thread the belt through the scabbard’s leather suspension and loop it around her waist. Emma experiments with the best angle at which to let the sword hang for a minute before electing to just cinch the buckle snug to her middle. The belt is overlong, but it only takes her a moment to formulate a solution, tying the remaining length off so that it hangs neatly downward and then pulling her hands back so she can survey her work. “Does that look right?”
He hums the affirmative as she practices yanking the cutlass from the scabbard, the easy rhythm with which she slides the blade out and back home again making it seem as if she were old hand at this. “It suits you, lass.” He scratches behind his ear. “As does your hair,” he adds shyly.
Emma blushes. “Thanks.” She fingers a golden lock over the back of her ear. “It, uh, it beats pushing it out of my eyes every other minute.”
He rumbles his agreement. “Indeed.”
Her eyes glint, and she grins, turning her attention back to her new sword. A thoughtful look crosses her face, and she chews on her lip.
Hook eyes her knowingly. “What is it, Swan?”
Her gaze turns hopeful. “Do you have a spare a knife or a dagger? Something small for my boot?”
His face brightens, and he cackles with approval. “Now you’re thinking like a pirate.” He pulls open a locker and retrieves a bound leather bundle, which he unties and lays open across the nearest bench to reveal a dozen smaller blades in various styles. He gestures. “Lady’s choice.”
Emma comes to his side and studies the collection. She selects the slightest of them, a simple blade with an unadorned grip and no guard, and pulls it from the sheath, testing the weight and giving it a simple flip. “Thanks,” she says, slipping the blade back into the sheath and bending down to tuck it into her boot.
“You’re very welcome.” Hook grins with admiration. He proceeds to bind up the remaining daggers and put them away. “And now that you’re armed, we must be sure that you can wield that cutlass properly,” he says, pointing to her scabbard. “It’s no longsword. Come.”
He leads her above, throwing his crewmen cool looks of warning to behave as they make their way starboard, the shadow from the main-mast providing them some shelter from the late morning sun. He takes the time to review the basics, making adjustments to her grip and stance and running her through a few principal cuts to let her familiarize herself with the weight of her new blade and its greater maneuverability compared to what she seems used to.
Emma proves herself to be an apt pupil despite having to take her lessons under the observation of seasoned pirates. Her bearing is indeed noble as she forces her eyes away from them and focuses on her weapon and his words, and her face is so set with concentration he’s left with little doubt that he can turn her into a good swordsman.
By midday, he’s completed his introduction, and he squints in the overhead sun. “Feel up to a quick spar before lunch, Swan?”
Indecision flashes briefly over her face as she glances at her cutlass and then at men scattered around them, most of whom are doing a poor job of pretending they aren’t watching, but, true to form, the decision not to back down takes hold and she straightens and tosses her head, planting her free hand on her hip defiantly.. “If you want.”
Hook smiles and positions himself across from her. “Aye. Let’s see what you’ve learned, shall we?” They stare at each other for a moment, swords at the ready, and though they both know she’s no match for him, her eyes shine with a determination to try to best him that sends a thrill through his chest nonetheless. He licks his lips with anticipation. “Begin.”
Work around the ship halts as the clash of steel grants the crew unspoken permission to give up their ruse and gather round. There are the expected cheers for the Captain, but he also hears a few calls of encouragement for the Lady Swan, and he hums as he parries Emma’s eighth strike. “Seems you have some admirers, love.”
Her beautifully flushed cheeks turn even rosier. “Yeah,” she pants, grunting as their blades slice against each other again and they both spring back.
“Can’t say I blame them,” he adds with a devilish grin. The tip of his sword traces a few lazy circles in the air, his steps mirroring hers as they circle. “You are a far sight prettier than I.”
This earns him a little chuckle, and she feints high and slashes low, forcing him to jump back a few inches.
A ripple of excited cheers and jeers erupt from the men, and Hook crows. “Excellent!”
He begins a light offensive, jabbing mainly toward her sides to give her a chance to practice deflecting, and when she appears to have gotten the hang of that, he follows up with a quick spin ending in a more aggressive slash. She reverts to a two-handed grip to block it and proceeds to keep both hands on the hilt as she tries to return the assault.
Hook tuts. “Drop your other hand, Swan. It’s not a longsword.”
She colors a little and complies. A minute later, however, she falls back to her old ways.
“The hand, Swan,” he says patiently.
Emma corrects herself again, looking chagrined as she whips her blade around for another strike. She grunts when he blocks her blow, the steel clanging hard. “Sorry.”
They exchange a few more attacks before he finally deigns to end it, pressing her sword off to the side and twisting his blade around to force her to lose her grip. Emma yelps indignantly as her cutlass clatters to the deck, but the men cheer, and she shakes her head and gives him a conciliatory grin. “One of these days, you’re going to show me how to do that.”
Hook chuckles, sheathing his sword and reaching down retrieve hers. “I suppose I could be persuaded.” He offers the hilt up to her in gentlemanly fashion, a smirk playing on his lips. “Very good, love. Excellent progress today. But keep your other hand in check,” he teases, arching a brow and gesturing toward her left arm, “or I may have to tie it behind your back.”
“Hmm.” Emma narrows her eyes at him knowingly. “No doubt something you would enjoy,” she comments, her face still glowing as she accepts her weapon and puts it away.
He laughs and gives her a wink as his men disperse. “No doubt.” He motions for her to lead the way toward his quarters. “Lunch?”
* * *
As apprehensive as Swan was about it, having the rest of the crew witness her sword fighting lesson with their Captain seems to go a long way toward earning their respect, and she notices that the men become more open to letting her observe them at their duties, even engaging her and indulging her questions as she learns more about the ship with each passing day.
She’s standing at the base of the main-mast and peering skyward one morning when Thomas swings down from the rigging to land beside her.
“Help you, milady?”
Swan bites her lip, studying the complicated network of ropes that extend in various directions overhead. “What’s it like up there?”
He laughs. “Depends on how you feel about heights, I s’pose. Made my heart race the first hundred times I went up there and still does when the weather’s foul.” He rubs the back of his neck. “But the view from the top on a clear day? Aye, it’s hard to beat.”
Her eyes trail along the thick lines of the shroud which arches above them. “Can I go up?”
“Oh.” Thomas blinks, surprised. “Well, beggin’ your pardon, ma’am, but I don’t know if that’s wise. Cap’n says our top priority is to keep you safe,” he replies apologetically.
She rolls her eyes, remembering the royal reward money, and cranes her head up again wistfully. “Well, what if I just go up there?” she asks, pointing to the main yard. “I don’t have to climb to the very top. I just want to see what it’s like.” She glances sideways at him with a hopeful expression. “Please?”
The poor lad looks conflicted. “I…” His eyes dart helplessly to Roberts, who approaches from the bow. “Sir? The Lady would like to climb the mast.”
The older pirate’s step slows, lines of disapproval and confusion creasing his face. “What on earth for?” he demands. “…Ma’am.”
“Just getting to know the ship, Mr. Roberts,” Swan explains. “The Captain’s encouraged me to learn a little about sailing while I’m here, and this can’t be any riskier than sparring with him,” she reasons, glancing back up at the yard.
Roberts makes a dubious sound low in his throat. “All due respect, milady, but the Captain’s an expert swordsman who knows how to spar without hurting you.”
“And you’re an expert sailor,” she counters sweetly. “I’m sure you can find a safe way for me to climb the rigging. Every member of this crew had a first time, didn’t they?”
He huffs, running a hand down his face. “The rigging’s no place for a Lady.”
She chuckles dryly. “Yes, well, I’m already on a pirate ship, sir. I'm pretty sure we’re past the point of arguing where I do and don’t belong.” She fixes him with one last long look of entreaty, and her chest swells with triumph as she watches the last of the man’s resolve finally bleed away.
His shoulders slump with a heavy sigh. “Fine,” he grits. “But you’ll wear a tether or else the Captain’ll have my head.”
Swan beams. “Thank you, Mr. Roberts.”
Roberts grumbles. “Get up there and get a line around the yard for ‘er,” he growls at Thomas. “Be quick about it.”
Thomas gulps and scrambles away.
* * *
Hook emerges on deck for his morning inspection, squinting into the easterly sun and breathing the temperate air.
“’Morning, sir.” Smee greets him with a nervous half-bow of his head.
His first mate’s tone is an immediate red flag, and Hook aims a questioning glance over his shoulder. “What’s the problem, Smee?”
“Um, no problem, Captain.”
He raises an eyebrow before looking around for signs of Emma. “Where’s the Lady this morning?” he asks. “Still below?”
“Uh... n-no.”
Hook turns his head curiously to see Smee wearing an anxious expression and pointing. His eyes travel upward, growing round when he glimpses the telltale green skirts and blonde ponytail whipping on the wind high above them. “Bloody hell,” he breathes. His forehead furrows, and he bellows indignantly. “Swan?!”
Perched atop the main yard and hugging the mast with one arm while she looks aft, Emma’s face comes into view as she leans forward a bit and flashes him a breathless smile. “Hi!” she calls back.
He backs up a few paces in order to see her better, mouth agape. “What the devil are you doing up there?”
She laughs, her face shining. “Flying.”
“Fly—” He clamps his mouth shut and charges forward, veritably leaping down the ladder to the middle deck. His frustrated glare lands on Roberts and a contrite-looking Thomas, who stand watching her at the foot of the port shroud. “What’s the meaning of this?”
“Apologies, Captain.” Roberts holds his palms up to mollify him. “She said you wanted ‘er to learn something of sailing and fairly begged to be allowed up, so we tied a tether to ‘er and I let Thomas show ‘er a bit about managing the sails. We’re just letting ‘er enjoy the view a while longer ‘fore she comes back down.”
Hook blinks at him and Thomas dumbly, the quartermaster’s words taking the sting out of his displeasure, and the anger fades from his expression as he glances upward again.
“For what it’s worth, she seems right at home up in the rigging,” Roberts notes with a rare gleam in his eye. “Never would’ve guessed it, but the girl can climb.”
“I’ll fetch her down, Cap’n,” Thomas offers hastily.
Hook huffs and waves the younger crewman off. “No, lad. I’ll do it. Back to your duties.” He reaches for the shroud and swings himself up easily as Thomas looks relieved and scuttles away.
“Will you be needing anything then?” Roberts asks, risking the barest of knowing grins.
Hook shakes his head. “Never thought you’d be the first to fall for her charms, Old Man,” he chides, narrowing his eyes.
Roberts snorts. “Fairly sure I wasn’t,” he shoots back, his expression turning droll. He clears his throat with a shrug. “She’ll do well enough. She’s got guts, I’ll give ‘er that.”
Hook concedes with a hum, trying to ignore the little surge of pride in his chest as he begins his ascent.
Emma is looking down at him with amusement when he draws near. “Coming to check on me?” she teases.
“Coming to make sure you don’t break your pretty neck,” he retorts, affecting a scowl. He pulls himself up onto the yard beside her, taking half a second to ensure a steady footing and a good grip on one of the lines.
She smiles, seeing through his feigned gruffness. “I didn’t mean to cause so much trouble. In their defense, your men did insist on taking good care of me.” She pulls one hand away from the mast to pluck at the improvised rope harness that girds her torso.
He huffs. “As well they should.” He relishes the way the morning sun plays upon her face, even as he forces his features to remain stern. “You are not to come up here without supervision. Understand?”
She nods agreeably. “It was trickier getting up here in a petticoat than I thought it would be,” she admits, wrinkling her nose. “And not just because I have to worry about being exposed by every stiff breeze.” Her cheeks turn crimson, and she smoothes the fabric down over her backside self-consciously.
Hook forgets his pretense and breaks out in a deep laugh, quite certain his men below would be more than happy to see a gale blow her skirt aloft. “Aye. Lovely as you might be in that dress, it may not be the most practical choice for climbing about.” He juts his lower lip out thoughtfully. “We’ll make port in about a week to shore up supplies. Perhaps you could find something else to wear that would be better suited,” he muses.
Emma chuckles. “No, it’s alright. I’ll make do. I don’t have any money anyway.”
“Consider it a gift then.”
She blinks over at him with big eyes before her expression softens and she shakes her head. “You don’t have to do that.”
“Aye,” he concurs cheerfully, “but there’s no bringing out the sailor in you without the proper clothes, Swan.”
She looks conflicted for a moment, but at last she gives a grateful nod. “It would be nice not to have to wear a corset,” she supposes, grimacing and arching her back slightly.
The motion causes Hook’s pulse to quicken as he eyes her gorgeous curves in profile. He swallows and plasters on a cheeky grin. “Then again, perhaps I should rescind the offer.”
She rolls her eyes and straightens, her cheeks flushing again, but he doesn’t miss the tiny, smug smile that hints at the corner of her mouth.
He chuckles. “Very well, darling. As you like.”
“Hmph.” Emma gives him a reproving side-eye before turning her gaze back out over the southern horizon. They stand there enjoying the view for a few long minutes, surrounded by the sound of the wind buffeting the sails and the soft groans of the ship. From somewhere below, the distant voices of some crewmen singing a shanty also rises to meet their ears.
“So what do you think of it?” he asks, watching a loose tendril of her hair curl backward over her brow.
She inhales the salty air contentedly. “It’s amazing,” she murmurs. “I’m starting to understand the appeal of a life at sea.”
Hook smiles, eyeing the endless blue expanse. “Aye. The ocean’s an unpredictable mistress sometimes, but there’s nothing like standing on the deck of your own ship and knowing that she can take you almost anywhere. Where else can you see so much of the world without ever leaving home?” He taps his hook against the mast.
“How long have you lived on the water?”
“Nearly all my life,” he replies. “Since I was a lad. I was ten when my brother and I boarded our first ship.”
“Ten?” Her mouth falls open. “And you never returned to live on land?”
He looks away. “No.” He hesitates when she waits for him to continue. “We… we were traveling with our father. He disappeared one night,” he explains quietly, steeling himself against his emotions and choosing the words carefully. “Left us in the service of the ship’s captain.”
Emma squints, looking horrified. “He left you,” she repeats.
A cheerless smile ghosts over his lips. “Aye. Turns out he was a thief fleeing capture. He went off the ship in a dinghy shortly after putting me to bed, I’m told. We never saw him again.”
He doesn’t have to see her face to feel the quiet sadness that settles over her. “And your mother?” she murmurs, clearly braced for another unpleasant revelation.
Hook dares to meet her gaze again, his expression becoming more drawn. “Died the year before. She’d been sick a long time. One day she fainted. Liam and I waited and waited for her to wake up. She never did.” He glances briefly at Emma’s now heartbroken face before redirecting his eyes to the tail end of their wake, staring numbly as it’s swallowed by the passing waves.
“You’ve lost so many people,” she observes softly.
“It was a hundred and fifty years ago, Swan.”
“Does that make it easier?”
He sucks in a breath, deciding whether to acknowledge what she seems to know already, and bows his head. “No.” He chuffs. “Wounds that are made when we’re young tend to linger.” Hook lifts his chin again and glowers out toward the waves.
Emma angles her head. “How have you lived so long, exactly?”
He hums, grateful for the change of topic, and his shoulders relax a hair. “I spent a very long time in Neverland,” he says simply. “The magic of the island makes it impossible to age there.”
Her brow wrinkles. “You went back to Neverland? Even after what happened with your brother?”
He nods.
“Why?”
He feels her eyes on him as he contemplates the most benign way he can describe the wrath and overwhelming desire for vengeance that fueled his decision to return to that accursed place. “I needed information,” he answers, trying to sound nonchalant.
She arcs an eyebrow. “You spent over a hundred years looking for information?”
Hook shifts restlessly. “I spent over a hundred years in the reluctant employ of Peter Pan, who rules the island. He was, shall we say, disinclined to let us leave.”
Emma frowns prettily as she considers this, a dozen questions writing themselves on her face. “What kind of information were you looking for?”
He’s quiet for a beat. “The way to kill the demon who took my hand.” His eyes dart away, and he swallows tightly, unsure why, for the first time, he feels less than comfortable telling someone about his quest to destroy the Dark One. For decades it’s been integral to his identity, as much a part of him as his hook, but now… now something about revealing himself to her as a man hell-bent on revenge makes him feel less than proud of who he is.
Silence falls between them, and he wonders whether he’s lowered her estimation of him. Not that it should matter, he reminds himself hastily, sneaking a glance at the unreadable expression on her face as she, too, stares wordlessly out over the ocean.
At last she clears her throat. “So, did you get the information you needed?” Her head rotates back toward him.
Hook nods soberly, a knot forming in his stomach at the bitter memory of learning about the Dark One’s dagger – the only weapon capable of killing its malevolent owner – from Milah’s son, Baelfire, during their ill-fated encounter in Neverland.
“Have you had the chance to act on it?” she asks softly.
His gaze remains fixed on the water. “Not yet.”
Emma bobs her head slowly and licks her lips. “And what will you do after it’s done?”
A wrinkle appears between his eyes. “I don’t know,” he admits.
She opens her mouth but falters, as if debating whether to say something. “Maybe…” she starts, “if you find yourself back in the north… you could come say hello to a friend.”
He blinks, his heart leaping in his chest as she glances back at him with a solemn smile. Friend. “Aye,” he agrees, flushing with pleasure and enjoying the hint of color that rises in her cheeks as he grins back at her. “I’d like that.”
* * *
“Come on, Swan. Let’s get a look.” Hook’s voice is slightly dampened by the curtain covering the doorway of the clothier’s dressing room.
A week has passed since Emma’s first climb up to the yard, and the, true to his word, Hook has put finding a more suitable set of clothes for her on the agenda for their two-night stop in this, the largest port in the Southern Isles. And thus she finds herself in the back of this shop, half-naked, with him but a stone’s throw away.
Swan huffs as she appreciates the lightweight cotton shirt in her hands, the fabric covered in matching white embroidery that gives it a lacy, feminine quality. “As many years as you’ve been alive,” she admonishes, slipping it on and beginning to do up the buttons leading up to the V-shaped neckline, “you’d think you’d have learned how to wait by now.”
Her ears catch his chuckle. “You need a hand, love?”
She smirks to herself. “Is that a joke?”
“No, I’m quite serious,” he calls back airily. “I’m rather good with fastenings.”
It’s her turn to laugh. “I’m sure you are.” Swan finishes buttoning the shirt and sweeps her ponytail free of the collar before examining her reflection in the clothier’s mirror. She smoothes the hem of the shirt down over her hips, turning this way and that to survey her appearance. Her eyes fall to the dark blue leather trousers the clothier had chosen for her. She may have had to suffer the mild indignity of being eyeballed and prodded and measured by the excitable wisp of a man while Hook looked on with a beguiled grin, but the result was definitely worth it, she thinks with a quirk of her lips. The trousers fit like a second skin, and while they’ll take a little getting used to, she has to admit that she loves the look of them as much as she loves the idea of no longer having her movement hindered by the voluminous fabric of a skirt.
Satisfied with her appearance, she reaches for the most indulgent piece of the ensemble – the thick cobalt jerkin with a high collar that the clothier had enthusiastically offered to go with the trousers. She’d expressed reservations about the cost, but Hook had simply rolled his eyes and stepped forward, transferring the jerkin from the other man’s hands to hers and nudging her toward the dressing room.
“Believe me, you’ll be glad for something like this when we travel farther north,” he’d said. “Go.”
Now that she wraps herself in the snug, buttery soft leather and links up the tiny, leaf-shaped clasps that run down one side, she can’t help but let her smile grow. It’s perfect.
Swan tries to mute her pleased expression when she pulls aside the curtain and steps back out into the shop, her old clothes and shoes sandwiched between her hands and the soles of her new knee-high boots thumping quietly across the stone floor.
Hook turns away from inspecting a dark red waistcoat and his jaw slackens at the sight of her, an appreciative sound sneaking past his parted lips. “Now that’s much better,” he rumbles, his wide eyes sweeping up and down.
“You like it?” she asks coyly, giving the clothier a grateful smile when he beckons for her to hand him her old things in exchange for a pair of elbow-length leather gloves.
Hook’s face brightens with a slightly awed smile. “You look stunning, Swan.”
Warmth creeps across her cheeks, and she allows herself to preen a little, experimentally wiggling her fingers as she finishes tugging the first glove on. “And here I thought you’d miss the corset.”
“Well, that does have its own charms,” he chuckles, scratching behind his ear, “but I’d say this is a better fit for a woman who wields a sword and climbs the rigging.” He ducks his head a little. “Besides, you’d be lovely in anything.” His words leave her heart fluttering, and his grin widens. He pulls out a purse heavy with coin and turns to the clothier. “She’ll have all of it.”
They leave the shop behind a short while later, the paper-wrapped parcel containing Swan’s old clothes swinging on its twine from the Captain’s hook. The sun shines, and the call of voices and the squawking of caged chickens greet them as they wander up the small side street and emerge back onto the port’s main thoroughfare.
“So now what?” she asks.
He hums. “Normally I’d begin negotiating for new supplies,” he replies. “But if you’d prefer I show you the town, I can leave the task to Roberts. It’s usually a quartermaster’s job, anyway.”
“So why do you do it?” Swan looks up at him, puzzled.
Hook’s eyes twinkle. “Because I find merchants to be much more honest when they’re faced with this,” he says, lifting his hook, parcel and all. He smiles mischievously, and she laughs. “Most just want to make a decent profit, but there are always a few swindlers who need a little… inspiration.”
Swan nods, remembering the way her skin had crawled when a vintner had once tried to sell Maggie a case of wine for twice what it was worth. A thought occurs, and she tilts her head. “Could I come along?”
He arches a brow and gives her an amused sideways glance. “Desperate to stay close to me, love?”
Her eyes roll skyward. “Or I could go explore the town on my own.”
“No, no.” He grins and pulls a piece of paper from his pocket, handing it over so she can see the purchase list written on it in his neat, flowing hand. “You’re quite welcome. Just remember that not even I can make talk of salt pork and pickled vegetables very interesting.”
She chuckles at his hubris while she peruses the sheet. “I’ll take my chances.”
The butcher that comes recommended to them has a very large shop and an excellent selection, but it becomes clear to Emma as she pretends to admire some hanging ham shanks and listens to him haggle with Hook over ten crates of cured meats that the burly, fast-talking man doesn’t have any qualms about charging whatever he wants, even after the Captain drops the pleasantries and pointedly sets his hook on the counter between them with a dull thunk.
Hook makes a dissatisfied noise in his chest as he eyes the new figure the butcher scribbles on a scrap of paper in lead pencil. “Thirty-two silver. That’s your best price?” he asks, his voice heavy with skepticism.
The man shrugs. “Afraid so, Captain.”
It’s hardly the truth. The telltale crawl of her skin makes Swan lick her lips. She rapidly considers her options for convincing the man to be more cooperative, briefly wishing she were still wearing something that left a little more cleavage on display. “Please?” she purrs, stepping forward to stand at Hook’s elbow and perching her fingertips on the counter. “You can afford to do a little better.” She looks the butcher straight in the eye. “I know you can.”
He blinks. “I… I really would love to, miss. But that has me barely breaking even as it is.”
Lie. She folds her lips in a tight smile. “That’s a shame. We can only spare twenty-six. Guess we’ll have to look elsewhere.” She slips her hands around the crook of Hook’s arm and gently pulls him toward the door. “Sorry to waste your time.”
“You’re not going to find a better price than that!” he protests.
Lie. Swan arcs an eyebrow over her shoulder at him. “I don’t know. I think we might.”
“Silly girl. Captain, please.” The butcher waves a doughy hand at Swan with frustration. “You and I understand business. Talk some sense into her.”
Much to her delight, Hook embraces her charade, canting his head to one side and allowing his eyes to flash murderously. “I’m sorry, did you just insult my Lady’s intelligence?” he snaps, whirling so fast she loses her grip on him. His hand finds the hilt of his cutlass. “You must have misspoken. Surely a smart man like you knows how unwise that would be.” He makes a show of stubbornly refusing to move even as Emma lays a hand on his shoulder and urges him to stand down.
The butcher glances at the sword and the blood drains from his face. He swallows hard. “Of… of course, Captain. My mistake, ma’am.”
Swan accepts his apologetic bow with a gracious nod, biting her tongue and doing her best to keep a straight face.
“Come, love,” Hook growls, giving the man another prize-winning glare before wrapping his hook arm around her back and reaching for the door knob. “If he won’t do twenty-six, he won’t do twenty-six.”
“I could do twenty-nine!”
They pause, shooting him identical dry expressions before daring to look at one another, and she can’t be sure whether the thrill she’s feeling right now comes from having the man right where they want him or from the way Hook’s eyes laugh and his arm tightens around her as they silently agree to continue out the door.
“Fine, then! Twenty-six, twenty-six…” the butcher grouses. He slaps a new slip of parchment on the counter. “Bleeding highway robbery,” he mutters, dashing off a purchase agreement.
Hook gives Swan the barest of winks and wanders back over to the counter, a little extra swagger in his step. “Take it from someone who knows, mate,” he says, snatching up the slip of paper between outstretched fingers. “If this were actual highway robbery, you’d be a lot worse for wear.”
* * *
“How did you know he’d do it?” Hook admires the purchase agreement one more time before tucking it into the breast pocket of his coat.
Emma allows herself a self-satisfied smile as they walk down the road together. “I just have a good feel for these things, I guess.”
“Perhaps I should make you the quartermaster.” He throws her a grin before checking their surroundings and nodding in the direction of the grocer.
Emma follows gamely. “And where would that leave Mr. Roberts?”
Hook snorts. “Knowing him, he’s got a secret fortune somewhere. He could take an early retirement or hire on a crew and find his own ship to captain,” he muses. “The Dread Pirate Roberts. Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?” He savors Emma’s dimpled cheek and dancing eyes and invites her to go first as they wander beneath the shade of the grocer’s enormous tent. “Now, love, care to work your magic again?”
By day’s end, he and Emma manage to secure agreements for enough victuals and supplies to sustain the Jolly the rest of the voyage to Misthaven if need be. Hook mentally tallies the sums while they sit in a local tavern awaiting the arrival of their evening meal. He shakes his head in amazement. “Don’t look now, Swan, but I think we make quite the team,” he informs her jovially. “This is the least it’s cost us to outfit the ship in years.”
“What is?”
They look up to see Roberts, a fresh flagon in his hand, halted on his way to rejoin some of the men at another table a few feet away.
Hook gathers the little sheaf of purchase agreements and hands them over, looking smug.
The quartermaster sets his drink down and shuffles through the papers, his bushy eyebrows leaping upward. “I’ll be,” he drawls with a toothy grin. “Those’re some pretty numbers.”
“Turns out the Lady knows how to drive a hard bargain,” Hook explains, gesturing toward Emma with his own ale and beaming. “You should see her do it.” He catches her eye and smiles. “It’s a thing of beauty.”
Emma blushes hard, and Hook chuckles as Roberts hands the papers back.
“It’s very impressive, ma’am. You’ll have to tell us your secret.”
She lifts her cup up to her demure smile. “It’s nothing, Mr. Roberts,” she replies, taking a sip. “The Captain bought some things for me today, and I was just returning the favor.”
Roberts raises his flagon to her. “Well, my hat’s off to you. And…” The normally-gruff man eyes her new clothes and hesitates a moment, as if the words are awkward on his tongue. “You… you look very nice.”
Hook swivels his head toward his crewman in surprise, and Emma rewards Roberts with a brilliant smile before the quartermaster wanders off with his cheeks as ruddy as a schoolboy’s.
* * *
Foamy waves lap gently at the stretch of white sand that runs north of the docks, the entire landscape saturated in shades of indigo and dark blue beneath the light of an enormous full moon. The dull roar of the ocean mixes in their ears with the intermittent rush of the evening wind that whispers along the coast, and the warm air smells faintly of brine. Swan surveys the scene with a happy sigh as she and Hook elect to make a detour on their way back to the ship. Behind them, the town is dotted with the glimmering light of a hundred lanterns, and the sounds of late-night merriments grow fainter as they hike several hundred yards off the path to the beach. The ground softens beneath their feet, and Swan stops for a moment to bend over.
Hook turns to watch as she pulls off her new boots and hitches the legs of her trousers halfway up her calves. “What are you doing?” Even in the relative dark, the white of his amused grin is evident.
“Enjoying the sand,” she says simply, snatching up her boots and straightening. “You said the shores up north are rocky. Who knows when I’ll be someplace like this again?” She shrugs and flashes him a little smile as she resumes their course, relishing the way her bare feet sink ankle-deep in the cool, dry grains.
They stroll up to the water’s edge, their parallel lines of footprints growing more distinct in the damp terrain, and she sighs happily as the perfectly tepid sea washes over her feet with every lazy surge. Swan cranes her head upward to admire the stars which twinkle in the inky void beyond the moon’s halo. “Does the night sky look the same in all the realms?” she wonders aloud. She glances over to see Hook smile and nod.
“Aye. The constellations move with location and season, but yes, it’s the same stars in every place I’ve encountered. It’s what allows me to navigate no matter where I go.” His gaze sweeps the heavens, and he slows, turning about-face and pointing. “See those four bright ones there? The Southern Cross?” He traces the perpendicular lines in the air with his finger.
Swan steps closer, squinting to try and see what he sees. “There?” Her voice is uncertain as she shifts her boots to her left hand and points with her right.
Hook steps around to her right side and hunches down a bit, all but lowering his chin onto her shoulder to try to approximate her line of sight. He reaches for her outstretched hand, and her heart begins to beat erratically at the sensation of his breath on her cheek and the warmth of his palm around her wrist as he adjusts her angle. “There.” He slowly moves her arm in a similar crisscross pattern, pausing briefly on each individual point of light. “One, two, three, four,” he counts quietly in her ear. “See it?”
Her lashes flutter, and she manages to nod despite the sudden fullness in her throat and the gooseflesh that seems to have erupted across her back and arms.
“Now follow the long axis,” he coaxes, drawing her hand toward the horizon at a slight angle, “about four-and-a-half lengths down. That’s south.” He seems to catch himself and pulls away, clearing his throat. “Um, see? It’s simple.” He scratches behind his ear.
Her breath feels stilted, as though none of the air around them can find its way to her lungs. “Yeah,” she croaks, tucking a stray curl back away from her face and forcing a nervous little laugh. “I’ll have to remember that.”
Hook diverts his gaze almost shyly and looks toward the ocean as he turns to resume their walk. Something a few paces ahead catches his eye, and he strides forward to investigate, reaching down to pluck an object from ground. “Ah! Look at this,” he calls.
Swan trots to his side, watching curiously as he straightens, cradling a flat, round disc in his palm. “What is that?”
“A sand dollar.” His thumb swipes across the surface a few times to clear the thin layer of wet sand that clings to it, allowing her to see the pretty, flower-like imprint in the center and the odd pattern of slits that surround it. He motions for her to take it. “Some people think they’re good luck.”
She chuffs and accepts, admiring the hard, milky white artifact in the moonlight as she gently brushes the last of the beach off it. “Guess I can use all the luck I can get,” she says with a rueful smile.
He chuckles. “Somehow I get the feeling you make your own luck, Swan.”
“Right. Because waking up on the wrong side of the world with no memories was so lucky,” she shoots back wryly, tucking the sand dollar into her jerkin.
“Well, if you hadn’t, you might never have met me,” he points out, shrugging amiably. “I’d call that a stroke of luck, wouldn’t you?” He offers her his arm and an impish grin.
She can’t help but laugh, and she acknowledges his point with a bob of her head, sliding her hand into the crook of his elbow and trying to ignore the pleasant quiver of her stomach as they turn to keep wandering. “I guess so.”
Thanks for reading! Ready for the next chapter? Click here!
#csbb#cs fic#captain swan#captain wench#cs ff#cs ef au#cs anastasia au#cs au#cs au ff#ouat ff#ouat fanfic#my writing#the long way home#captain duckling
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@leafyxthiefy and I were discussing the sad lack of Disney aus, and then High School Musical mas au was mentioned, and well, look, I ain’t gonna write it, but here’s how it might be done, and if you wanna, please do and tag us?
Izo really loves theater, yeah? And Haruta. They used to put on productions of fairy tales in the living room and rope their siblings into being the cast, and Marco as the oldest ended up trying to direct/help/figure it all out for them, and he somehow just never got out of the habit? and they're in high school and yet he's still doing it and then we have Izo and Haruta as idk a real nice friendly casual ryan and sharpay?
and idk one of his other siblings, probably Thatch???? helps with the music sometimes and he's like, Marco, let's write a love story, and Marco is like nope, no thanks, let's stick to adventures like we do, kay? kay
Thatch is like, "noooooo we've never done a love story" "and I'm not gonna" "c'mon, izo would love it" "but it's a love story" "look we'll throw in pirates, too, okay?" "......" "you love pirates" "......no fair fine, okay"
and oh, it's the tale of roger and rouge
and usually he writes the roles for Izo and Haruta, yeah? with them in mind, which is kinda unfair because they're the stars of the theater dept now because of course they are, and they're amazing, of course, but it's hard for anyone else to compete when the main roles are literally written for them, you know? Only it's love story, and it's hard for Marco to wrap his head around for them, and he starts to drift, starts to go back to the fairy tales, starts to do typical prince/princess stuff.
Only, the princess is boring, so let her snark.
The prince is too perfect, so make him fail.
And somewhere along the line, he starts writing for himself, because he can only write what he knows. The princess becomes a pirate, Rouge, queen of the seas, embodiment of freedom, all sly smiles and snark and slippery, stealing and singing and leading a merry chase, and the poor guy, Roger, chases after her through a series of pratfalls, setting out to be pirate king and blinded by the stars she put in his eyes, and it's ever so fun, with quick teasing songs and a lot of playful exchanges and this one lovely slow duet on a beach in the moonlight
meanwhile, in the background, Ace and Sabo meet at, idk, karaoke. Because Luffy. Nah, wait, that's too au, hang on, we can fix this
they attended the same elementary school. Ace and Sabo were bestest friends and he ran away to their house all the time because his parents were never home so they didn't know, only one day they had to move and took Sabo with them
...he tried to run away and got hit by a car?
Ace heard, thought he was dead, but he was just in a coma for a while? forgot stuff? and his parents didn't notice because it's not like they've been around anyway?
So Sabo turns inward and studies, because college is the closest escape he can manage, and he's gonna get a full ride and not rely on his parents for anything. He's gonna disappear and be independent if it kills him
boom, science squad Sabo
MEANWHILE Ace likes Disney movies and reading, but his Grandpa wants him to join the military???? he doesn't want to, but Garp is like "ROTC or gtfo" so Ace compromises with sports, because still teams and activities
so he has to sports team, and boom, we get crouching jock hidden nerd, and he lowkey hates it, but it's life, whatever, and if he doesn't want it, well, there's nothing he wants more, so might as well, right?
Until. Until.
So Sabo has this grades thing down, right, but if his parents move him one more time, he's gonna have to start working his way up to valedictorian again, he hasn't got time for this. He needs something to look hella good on college applications, and it needs to keep him out of the house but not take up valuable time and not sports, ugh, teamwork? no thanks, and nothing that requires anything academic, so it's band or theater, really.
He goes theater, maybe he can be like a lighting technician and study in the booth or something, or learn a practical skill like makeup to hide scars; overall a lot more practical than music. So he joins drama and doesn't think twice about actually auditioning.
And that's all well and good except he leaves the library one day to go to drama club and he passes Ace in the hall and Ace doubletakes so hard he almost falls over. It can't be Sabo, it can't--but it looks like him, he walks the same, maybe--maybe???? so screw practice, he follows Sabo to the theater, where tryouts are happening today because plot convenience
"Sabo," he says, and the guy turns around. Same eyes, same face, same suspicious paranoia, same bags under his eyes, same stubborn frown--how could it be anyone else? "Sabo," he says, reaching out, and the guy steps back. "Do I know you?" he says, and Ace goes cold
And he walks away, so Ace chases him all the way to the theater. He gets into a shouting match with has-to-be-Sabo right in the middle on the auditorium, and the theater teacher sighs and says, "if you have something to say, come up here and say it. Obviously you're dramatic enough for the drama club."
Ace storms on stage and yells at Sabo and Sabo yells right back and falls into taunts as naturally as blinking, and it's so easy, and he knows just what to say to get Ace to go red and splutter and chase him, and he also knows the stage and the area because it's his domain, and he bounces around as Ace chases him, yelling at him to come back, and Sabo just taunts and like, hangs over the rail of the fake pirate ship, and Ace throws up his hands and stomps around and says things like, "Why did I even miss you?!" and "I can't believe you forgot!" and "Luffy! Remember Luffy????" and actually--actually Sabo does
Sabo goes soft and says, "Luffy?" and Ace folds his arms and says, "Luffy," and Sabo sinks down to sit, resting his head on the railing as everything falls into place behind his thought, and Ace stands there, looking up, his heart in his eyes, and the teacher yells "Scene!" and Marco stands up from the front row and says, "it's them or I walk."
and of course the problem is that Marco wrote himself a love story, and as Sabo tilts his head and smirks sideways and says the words Marco wrote, of course he'd start to fall in love, because that's what he wrote it for. And every time Ace laughs and gets back up, every time Ace has a passionate, poetic speech, well of course the words cut Marco to the heart because that's what he wrote it for.
And the fact that they work so well on stage is only compounded by their chemistry offstage, where Sabo will drape himself across Ace's back to read the script over his shoulder and Ace will run fingers through Sabo's hair and murmur in his ear on days when the eye-bags are particularly deep. Sabo won't talk about his scars but Ace can touch them, press his hand right up to them, and Sabo will just sigh and go limp. No one's allows to mention Ace's tattoo, but Sabo's allowed to trace the letters with careful fingers. For two high school guys who met a few weeks ago, they're amazingly close, and Marco can only watch it all happen and tell himself that it's good that they're like this. It'll make the play better. It's a love story; that's what he wrote it for, and he never once expected to want it to be his.
And, see, Sabo owes Ace his sanity and Ace owes Sabo his personality, but they both owe Marco for each other and neither one is ever gonna forget that
And Ace goes to Marco to try to "get to know his character" and Sabo goes to Marco to ask if this line needs more vibralto or perhaps this harmony is just--like, could we do it like this? and Thatch is in the background making these awful faces at Marco behind their backs and Marco is Ignoring Him Entirely
Leafy: Sabo being the highish classed boy that he is he may have learned the piano and one day, he could be sitting in the theatre room, his hands lazily playing some sort of ballad, his fingers just glide on the keyboard but like unbeknowest to him, Marco had snuck in because its free period for him too, to like practice some chorus lines for the play and the way that Sabo plays with his serene expression, just looking like he belongs and the way he makes the piano sing, it makes him want to be a part of that, he is captvated and wants to join but?? is he allowed? The pull of the music is too strong tho and before either of them know it, he's there too, his fingers also on the piano now, the little song becoming something more as it turns into a little duet and sabo is startled at first but also?? he has a high respect for Marco and his skills at the piano so its like an honor and all and he loves the sound they create together?? so maybe we?? can like keep doing this if you want, just play
and oh we could probably get a scene in there where Sabo keeps "messing up" in the moonlight duet and Marco sighs and is like, no, like this, and he has to step in to show them and he only meant to do the phrase but somehow he ends up singing the whole love duet with Ace while Sabo watches his every move--for the good of the play, of course.
And Ace just can't seem to get this one bit of choreography right, where he is supposed to pick "rouge" up off the deck and spin her around and into an underarm twirl and Sabo is like, "drop me again and I'll scream, Marco, come show him how it's done" and Sabo is really light on his feet and so responsive it's a pleasure to work with him and he ends up going through the whole number, with Sabo beaming in his arms and Ace's eyes heavy on his shoulders, because he really does have to learn this, you know???
sabo being like, "I can do this backwards in a princess dress and heels, Ace, c'mon" because Sabo probably had dancing lessons. Ace learned to fight from Garp
Thatch is miming throwing up off stage
Everything is happy until a fight, teach, idk, something goes down and the school calls their guardians
Leafy: they're both like "why are you doing this? what is a play going to do for you? study and get into whatever college" while Garp is like "are you slacking on me, if you cant abandon this silly excuse of a curricular activity then what about military school?"
Leafy: so then Marco has to make things right somehow, like not entirely for the sake of the play but also for like them!! because?? he was so used to being around them and now that they are no longer there he misses them and also, like his two best friends boyfriends are miserable and not in the play together and ?? can we not do all three things? so marco recruits his siblings who happen to be in whatever sport ace is in and sabo's science lab, together they are able to help them keep up with practice/work and the play??
And then the play happens and Luffy drags his cross-clique group to go see it and all the Whitebeard siblings and basically everyone and instead of being about breaking down barriers and stuff it’s a cute little love story about defying your parents’ expectations/being yourself????
idk I’m sure there are ~Morals~ but I dunno what they are
and it ends with mas all happy and Thatch being like, “See? See? I told you a love story was a good idea!”
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List all the things you’re currently working on in as much or little detail as you’d like, then tag some friends to see what they’re working on: writing, art, gifsets, whatever.
I was tagged by @miss-ingno - your list was an interesting read, love! :D I hope mine isn’t too boring haha. (Actually it’s basically just the list of I’m a terrible human being, so.)
I tag anyone who sees this who hasn’t done it yet and wants to because I’ve seen quite a few and am not sure who’s already been tagged basically haha. But feel free to do it and say that I was the one who tagged you because I’d love to read some more. :’)
My shit is under this read more~
To Write:
La Vida Mocha Chapter 2. And beyond. And I should definitely plan it all out too. Oops.
I wanted to write a thing for @thilesluna‘s Lunael FAHC/Cop AU a while ago and I still have a bunch of planning notes for that
I have a fleshed out backstory/headcanon for Max (from Camp Camp) that I’ve been meaning to write up
A FAHC Mavin AU in which Michael accidentally adopts a bunch of cats called Catastrophe in Love because I’m so clever
A modern day Tuckington AU idea I’ve literally had for ages called What Makes a House a Home in which essentially Tucker is homeless and Wash is far too charitable for his own good
A friend of a friend has a Camp Camp AU where Jasper lives and he and David are camp counselors together and also boyfriends so I wanted to write a thing for that
A prompt I got for... last year’s Monty Oum Project that was “You need to stop leaving dead bodies in my kitchen” and I was gonna write it about FAHC Ryan of course but then it turned into this thing where I started researching symbolism of body parts/organs? and. Yeah. So there’s that.
Obviously I wanna write something for the Jeremwood Dwight’s Delivery AU some day !!
Secret birthday presents >.> >.> >.> (3 to 5 at the moment; I’m undecided if I should write or draw for one of them, and undecided if I should write one or two things for another person. That is all.)
Idk if any of my followers know of the beautiful comic Check, Please! but. a Zimbits Band AU.
A rewrite or continuation of Legacy?? Maybe?
THE GIVEAWAY PROMPTS FROM MY 100 FOLLOWER GIVEAWAY THAT I STILL HAVEN’T FILLED OUT YET ???? I SUCK @an-adventure-in-writing @mariruse @4ever-tuckington-lover But there was a Tuckington college AU first date, Docnut honeymoon or holiday, Maine/Wash hurt and comfort and a Tuckington songfic to Buy Me a Rose. I don’t know if it’s any consolation at all that they’re on this list but. Don’t hate me? <3
THIS fucking list of 5-10 sentence prompts that I made for myself for some reason???
A bunch of assorted AU ideas of various levels of fleshed-outedness including..:
Jeremichael Immortal FAHC AU (I wrote the intro and planned out two scenes and that was it but I still like that AU)
FAHC Origins AU (co-writing - we have so much planning done but not much actual fic haha)
Something I call the “Work Worms” AU. Don’t ask. I don’t even actually remember most of it.
A Raywood subway AU? (It was a conversation I had with a friend once)
Myan Journey AU that could be cool but would likely be pretty obscure lmao
Myan/Jackeoff/Jerevin Diner AU (Dunno if I’ll ever write that one tbh)
Ramwood What Happens In Vegas AU (Yes, like the movie. Geoff as Jack and Ryan as Joy. It works, I swear.)
An AH Pirate AU of some kind? That one just because it’d be fun lol
Jeremavin/Jackeoff/Raywood Heartland AU (maybe? Or else I could rework it to be Mavin/Jackeoff/Jeremwood. Still not sure yet. But that show is great, I can’t believe I didn’t know it existed until this year, I used to love the books. Thank god there’s 10 seasons of it haha.)
NOT TO MENTION these prompts that I’ve been sitting on in my inbox, some for maybe like over a year?? (and I know not all were intended to be prompt prompts but i’M TAKING THEM AS SUCH)
Honestly, I’m definitely forgetting stuff that should be here too. I’m basically just a big mess who comes up with too many ideas and makes too many promises that I won’t keep and then I either Never Write or write what I’m not supposed to and just keep adding to this never-ending list. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
To Draw:
That one birthday present that maybe I’ll draw something for maybe I’ll write something for or maybe both, who knows >.> Need to do that this weekend though either way hah
I have a bunch of drawings of my OCs in various AUs and situations that I’ve been wanting to draw for forever but have never gotten around to; there’s a list of that on my phone too but I won’t subject y’all to all the details that you wouldn’t understand because I barely talk about my OCs hahah. I made them all in the Sims instead anyway lol
My irl friend Georgia wants me to draw her and Gavin’s, like, life/love story lmao
Other:
Finish up my RT/AH rec list (making my own youtube playlists for some, linking everything, adding series and things that are good, y’know)
Just. This blog. Do it. Find gifs of my OCs’ FCs (lmao), write up their proper bios and life stories, add in family trees and info about AUs. Yeah I had a whole plan for that blog. (@laurens-ocs)
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My Top Ten Video Games of 2018
Well, here were are again, my friends. After the non stop roller coaster thrillride of VIDEO GAMES 2017, can 2018 live up to the hype??? I’m gonna go ahead and say no right off the bat, but while every single week wasn’t filled with a new incredible genre defining experience like last year, we still had some genuine certified bangers in the mix, many of which I think will remain important to me as the years go by. It should be noted this is the first year since 2014 where a Trails game hasn’t hit the market, so for the first time ever since I started writing these lists, a Trails game will not reign victorious at the end. Scandalous! Impossible!! Shit year tbh, but we’ll get by.
Outside of games this year is maybe the best year of my entire life?? I got out of a years long slump, started an actual genuine career path, and then somehow managed to fenegle falling in love into the whole mix. These lists have always come from some greater sense of yearning to reach out and communicating how I feel about things I love to anyone who will listen, but right now all I can think of is about how happy and lucky I am for my life to have taken the turns it did this year. 2019 is gonna have to try real hard to break my stride.
If you’d like to read my previous rambly lists, here they are:
2015
2016
2017
Anyway without further ado, here’s ten games that aren’t Trails of Cold Steel 3(WHEN??):
10. Thronebreaker: The Witcher Tales
This one is only at the bottom of the list because I didn’t have time to finish it. I loved getting to jump into the world of the witcher again. The world is dark and gritty and the choice are morally grey and the writing is impeccable and gwent is even more fun to play as a main mechanic than it was in the Witcher 3 as a minigame. I can’t wait to dive back into this one come the new year.
9. Radiant Historia: Perfect Chronology
One of the most well written and executed time-travel-based JRPGs I’ve ever played. It’s a story about trying to fix mistakes, about different perspectives trying to understand each other instead of fighting over differences.
It’s got an overall theme of realizing how important you can be to the world around you despite seeming insignificant that really resonated with me, an amazing cast of characters and it also just happens?? To be really fun to play??
8. The House in Fata Morgana: A Requiem for Innocence
That I didn’t play the first game the year it came out is a damn crime, this series of gothic tragedies has such special, meaningful and important themes of redemption and sacrifice and finding the people who will survive the world with you no matter what. It tackles mental illness, lgbt topics with an immense amount of respect and tells some of the most heart wrenchingly real and gutting stories, but it all culminates in the most viscerally satisfying way.
This sequel delves into one of the most unspoken parts of the original while also offering promising and hopeful glimpses into the future. It’s absolutely a must play if you in anyway liked the original.
7. Wandersong
Now here’s one that came absolutely out of nowhere. This game just oozes joy out of every pore. You play as a dandy bard who can only interact with the world via music trying to save it from being destroyed. Heavy themes of pacifism and the internal struggle of doing your best when you know for a fact your best won’t be good enough cover this thing like sprinkles on the most delicious and colorful donut.
Another thing I love is how every single chapter of this game plays differently, one will be a pirate adventure where you steer a ship with pirate shanties, the other will be a Majora's Mask still town sim, it goes on like this, and it never once gets boring. This game will make you smile the biggest smile from start to finish.
6. God of War
Remember Kratos?? He’s back, in open world action-RPG form. I sort of grew up with the original GoW trilogy and am of the opinion that they aged about as well as I did(which is fuckin not gracefully, teenager me was a fuckin mess). God of War is out of its edgy teenager phase now, and just barely squeaking out of its holier than thou college student phase into a game that actually has a few things to say, fun characters, an amazing world, and a paternal relationship that is kind of actually a joy to watch unfold despite everyone making fun of the game for it.
This game is like twice, maybe three times as long as the original trilogy which hilariously kind of makes those games feel like a prologue to this one. I suppose the real ironic thing is they kind of are?? They were shallow angry games with nothing to say but their existence created a character that, under the right light, under THIS light, could actually be extremely compelling and fun to watch grow alongside his boy. This series went from one I was glad to see gone to one I can’t wait to get more of.
5. Yakuza 6: The Song of Life/Yakuza Kiwami 2
It’s absolutely insane that Yakuza is popular now. I got into this series 10 years ago and at the time every single new yakuza release was a blessing and a curse; blessed because holy shit they actually put out a new Yakuza game and cursed because oh god it sold like shit and they probably won’t localize the next one why did they localize the zombie spin-off it almost killed the series nooooo don’t localize that give us the samurai games instead.
So anyway, this year I finally finished my journey playing through all 7 mainline Yakuza games. The journey of Kiryu Kazuma has come to an end and I have seen every step he’s taken. Yakuza 6 itself had kind of a really rough new engine that Kiwami 2 ended up refining, and from a gameplay perspective these games are basically the same, for the most part(Kiwami 2 is just better). Neither of these games come close to touching the masterful highs of Yakuza 0 but from a story perspective I think the respect and love this series has for its protagonist is unmatched, and while I was sad to see him go, I will never forget that big good crime boy and his whacky antics.
Ganbare, Kiryu-san...sayonara!!!!
4. The Messenger
This game fucking rules, I really don’t know how to do it justice, I played it on a whim and fell in love with it for the time it took me to beat it in a way that I haven’t done with a game in a long time. The gameplay is fluid and fun, the writing is charming and legit hilarious at times and the soundtrack, oh baby the soundtrack, if this wasn’t a year where Celeste came out this game would win every single award for OST of the year, I would fight anyone who disagreed.
The main gimmick of this game once you reach the halfway point is being able to shift between the 8 bit past and the 16 bit future, and every time you do the music will warp to fit those aesthetics and the game does this so freaking seamlessly, it’s amazing. The final level in particular meshed the music so well with the narrative that I was like fist pumping the whole way through the final sequence of the game.
It rules extremely hard, play it. Yes, you, you reading this right now, play this game so these people will make more for me. Please?
3. La-Mulana 2: The 0th Body, The 9th Spirit
Chalk this one up for game of 2018 I most can’t wait to replay and do a bunch of quick runs of. The original La Mulana is one of my favorite games of all time and this sequel delivers more of all the stuff I love while streamlining a lot of the more obscure and obtuse solutions. The music, the bosses, the world, all of the best things about the first game were all just as on point in this one.
The game evokes a sense of mystery you can only really achieve in a sequel to a game like the original La Mulana by constantly making you question the lore you already knew from the original. This all culminates in a sidequest that for a game as inscrutable as opaque as LM2, I still ended up getting really really emotionally invested in.
I don’t think there will ever be a La Mulana 3, and if that’s the case I’ll be able to leave this series happy, these two games complete each other in such a huge way, and will remain some of my favorites for years to come.
2. Celeste
I swear to god, this game was my Game of the Year for 9 whole months. I have never in my life played a game with this much precision perfect game design. This is maybe the tightest most consistent feeling platformer of all time. It’s like basically perfect on a gameplay level. That it meshes it’s gameplay with it’s themes so well is what truly makes it stand out and transforms it into not only a viscerally satisfying, tough but fair game, but an emotionally resonant masterpiece that will stick with me for years to come.
Celeste is a game about climbing a mountain. Celeste is a game about overcoming depression and anxiety and learning to cope and better yourself. These things are not interchangeable, the challenges you face as a player in this game all tie in perfectly to the main character, Madeline’s struggle to just fight through her self doubt and self loathing. It’s an extremely real tale, despite how fantastical the visuals are. It’s a game about fighting and screaming and clawing at that fucking Mountain to give you a way to have your heart again, and it’s absolutely wonderful.
The game is difficult, but every personal triumph accompanies one in game, and it lets you truly feel the feelings the game is trying to evoke alongside it. This is the kind of game that only comes once or twice a decade. I’d be extremely surprised to see anything hit this level any time soon.
1. Dragon Quest XI: Echoes of an Elusive Age
This is the gold standard for all JRPGs now as far as I'm concerned. There are series that go deeper, that go harder, that go all the way in with their music but no game out there exists that is so confidently just the classic all encompassing idea of a JRPG like this one. This game is pure comfort food, it knows exactly what it is and what it is is a fun heartwarming and charming classic JRPG “chosen one gets the cool sword and fights the dark lord” tale and damn it if it hasn’t been a while since we had just a good one of those.
Haha, just kidding.
A third of the way through, this game takes a dramatic shift and flips everything on its head in a way that hasn’t been really seen or executed this well since FF6. Suddenly the comfortable is taken away, the world is scary, bleak, and the themes you missed, that were simmering in the background since the start of the game start to boil over to the surface. The world is darker but the people in it are warmer, they hold themselves together until the day comes, and the game will find ways to make you cry you would never expect from a series this traditional. These themes all culminate in a super satisfying finale that, while not entirely happy, at least leaves the world in a better place than it was before, with it’s people that much closer.
Now what if I just didn’t write any of that and told you why I really love the game.
Credits roll, and the post game, that is to say, the final third of the game, begins. What if the shift never came, how would the world be different? How would these characters acrs resolved? Who would live? Who would die instead? What does this happening mean to the world? What does this new future hold?
In one simple moment, you answer all of those questions, and Dragon Quest XI becomes a prequel to Dragon Quest III (which was a prequel to DQ1 but that’s less important).
All of a sudden this entire series has lore, everything is connected in a way it had never been for 30 years, and it fits so seamlessly and perfectly that it could only have happened in a series like Dragon Quest, which has had the same writer across all 11 games. As a fan who had played all the available english games this was such an insane rewarding moment. I struggle to really compare it to anything else outside of maybe like…
Oh shit.
OH SHIT.
Outside of goddamn Trails.
Ya’ll know what that means right?
That’s right, Trails wins game of the year once again. STILL THE KING BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
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Fantasy Lesbian Romance Novel Review Corner Extravaganza
so i’ve been reading a lot of lesbian fantasy romance novels! i always knew they were a thing that existed but upon just picking one up lately i haven’t been able to get enough so i’ve gone through quite a few. if you are a fan of swords, sorcery, and girls kissing girls, you might be interested in some of these too!
i’m going to give my thoughts about the ones i’ve read, and also mention how much homophobia exists in the book and how relevant it is to the plot, since i know people have varying feelings about that kind of thing.
i’ll put a cut here for kindness, so people don’t have to scroll forever. let’s begin!
Dragonoak by Sam Farren (Amazon: books 1, 2, 3) this is where it all began for me (thanks @d-medusa for the Sick Rec) and it’s pretty much the pinnacle of the genre for me thus far. it stands out hard because the vast majority of characters (and there are a lot of them) are gay women. there are several important non-binary characters, a handful of trans women, and best of all, no one ever comments on any of the above. ever. at all. it’s just a very gay setting and no one questions it, no one argues, it’s just How Shit Is. beyond that appeal, there’s a lot of fun fantasy shit: kingdoms and queens, dragons and necromancers, pirates and political intrigue, and it’s just a really great, fun time. i could not recommend these books any more highly than i already am. book 1 is admittedly a little slow/scattered, and if you can’t cling to the budding romance taking center stage, you might have some trouble with it; things pick up hard in the latter books, however. please give them a try! Homophobia Content: none. literally none. zero. no transphobia either.
When Women Were Warriors by Catherine Wilson (Amazon: books 1, 2, 3) these are not exactly fantasy as such, but they’re very much in the same vein. old-style, bands of female warriors, warring tribes, all that kind of thing, just without magic or anything supernatural. a touching if extremely straightforward tale of a girl become a warrior’s apprentice, falling in love with that warrior, undergoing trials, proving herself, et cetera. i might be making this sound sorta bland, and parts of it are, but there’s enough solid girl-love to carry you through. high points include a lot of allegorical stories inserted into the text here and there, low points include the most Hemingway-style writing i’ve seen outside of Hemingway himself. Homophobia Content: none at all; romances between women are expected and encouraged.
Lyremouth Chronicles by Jane Fletcher (Amazon: books 1, 2, 3, 4) oh boy, Jane Fletcher. i really dug this and her other series (detailed below), but man, once you’ve read one of her books, you’ve read them all; she has a very definitive style and she sticks to it hard. whether or not that style works for you may vary, but it hit with me really hard. these four books detail one specific couple, an exiled warrior and a budding sorcerer, and the adventures they have in the world. i ADORED these two characters, their consistently strong romance, and i was extremely sad to finally see their story end; both of them are extremely flawed, both have a great deal of depth, and they complement each other very well. i love the explorations of magic that permeate all four books, i love the world, just a great frickin time all around. Homophoba Content: ehhhh, there’s definitely some, and while it’s limited to the first portion of the first book, that section is fucking brutal if you don’t like homophobia in your books. once it’s past, though, the rest is totally free of that kind of thing.
Celaeno by Jane Fletcher (Amazon: books 1, 2, 3, 4, 5) not exactly fantasy, again, but not super far from it either. this was interesting initially because there are literally zero characters not only in the series, but in existence in the world, and if you’re shallow about your lesbian fantasy like i am, that is absolutely a good thing. unlike Lyremouth, however, which was pretty steady in quality all throughout, these vary hugely; i found myself less and less interested as the series progressed. each focuses on a different couple, and each have a very different level of stakes. in a world dominated by a religious order, some women become heretics and seek to eke out their own existence, even while hunted down by said religious order; an interesting enough backdrop, but some of the books (3 and 5, specifically) are just so low-stakes (solving an individual murder, talking a lot about sheep theft, respectively) that even the romance can’t carry them. book 2 is by far the best with the deepest characters, so read the first two and then stop there, imo. Homophobia Content: as mentioned, no men exist in this world, so homophobia as a concept simply doesn’t exist.
Adijan and her Genie by L-J Baker (Amazon; sadly, they don’t seem to carry an ebook version) super fun individual novel, in a fictionalized middle eastern setting; i can say pretty thoroughly that it didn’t go the way i expected it to whatsoever, in a good way, but i absolutely HATED the protagonist for constantly making the worst decisions possible over and over. an desperate alcoholic seeks to eke out a living for herself and her wife, loses her wife, gains a genie, and proceeds to continue to make terrible decisions constantly until things just kind of work out for her. as much as i hated the protagonist, the rest of the characters were interesting enough, as was the core romance. still recommended, if you can get your hands on a copy. Homophobia Content: peppered throughout; the genie of the title is exceptionally homophobic, though (surprise) she relents by the end.
Lady Knight by L-J Baker (Amazon) another of my top favorites, we watch the world’s sole lady knight as she faces constant sexism and discrimination, falls in love, faces constant homophobia and her lover forcibly married away from her, general sadness and ill tidings abound. by and large, it’s a tragedy, but the characters (especially the protagonist) are extremely excellent, relatable, and well written. the constant sexism (however realistic it may unfortunately be) definitely wears at you, but it’s worth going through. Homophobia Content: oh my god there’s so much and it never ends. sexism too; if you can’t handle them, avoid.
The Pyramid Waltz by Barbara Ann Wright (Amazon) oh my god there’s like three sequels to this? i just found out when i went to get that link, holy shit i’m so excited now. anyway apparently i only read book 1 of a four book series, but book 1 was really fucking great! standard fantasy setting, romance between a princess and an exotic visitor, political intrigue and murder, you get the idea. really fucking cool details, though, like that magic is performed through little pyramid-shaped objects; they go to a lot of detail about it and how it all works and it clicked with me pretty well. the main couple were great, but the side characters vary in depth and interest. overall, recommended, i’m gonna go buy the other three right fucking now and binge on them. later. Homophobia Content: none that i can recall, at least in the first book. the princess is very gay and no one ever questions it.
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Ranking All 49 One Piece Anime Arcs (Yes, Even The Filler)
On July 7th, the long-awaited Wano arc of One Piece begins, and because we're about to jump into an arc that's been building up for eleven years, I think it's as good a time as any to rank all 49 of the arcs that we have already. And I'm going to include the filler arcs, too, because even though many of them can't really hold a candle to the main narrative, I think a few of them are quite underrated.
49. Buggy's Crew Adventures
This isn't really an arc so much as a sigh of relief after the runaway train of emotion of the last few episodes of Arlong Park. You can laugh at Buggy for a bit after watching Nami's soul get ripped apart (and then put back together again).
48. Post Alabasta
You know video game sidequests that are basically around to level up your specific partner characters so that they don't get immediately wiped out in boss fights? This is the anime filler arc version of that. It's fun, though.
47. Foxy's Return
I loooooove Foxy and I looooove the Davy Back Fight arc. But Foxy's Return doesn't quite hit home. It might be because we last saw Foxy six episodes ago, but it truly speaks to Foxy's character that he'd try to make a grand, dramatic return after he got the crap kicked out of him so recently.
46. Spa Island
Foxy returns again in Spa Island, though this filler arc is mostly notable for the fact that Luffy uses Gear Third to split an artificial island in half. That alone wins this arc points.
45. Warship Island
Warship Island isn't a bad filler arc, just a victim of poor placement. It comes right after Loguetown and right after the Straw Hats have each declared their dreams. So it becomes a pit stop arc, like the Straw Hat crew getting gas and snacks before they head out on the Grand Line.
44. Little East Blue
I like to think of Little East Blue as a celebration of pre time skip One Piece, where the Straw Hats get (deservedly) celebrated for a bit. It's cute and it's a nice prologue to the Strong World movie.
43. Z's Ambition
The filler arcs that precede the movies are an odd bunch, as they tend to end with the main villain of the movie showing up in the last five minutes and declaring their plans. So it's hard to enjoy them on their own. That said, Z's Ambition has enough action that even if you don't watch Film Z (but you should, as it's great), you won't really mind the cliffhanger finale.
42. Straw Hat Separation
After Kuma wiped out the crew, this batch of episodes shows where they all ended up. And it's mainly a montage of Straw Hats being confused. And don't get me wrong—the Straw Hats do confusion like nobody's business. But you get more out of their separation in the Post War arc when they finally get around to business.
41. Diary of Koby-Meppo
Koby is a character that has always deserved more time, so getting a few episodes devoted to him and Helmeppo training to be Marines is welcome. Also, my dude Garp shows up for the first time, which means that I've rewatched these two episodes FAR more than I should.
40. Goat Island
Goat Island doesn't feel as "classic" as G-8, nor is it as entertaining as Ocean's Dream. In fact, it's about as fluffy as the goats that appear in it. But a three episode arc where Chopper talks to goats and Luffy doesn't beat up a villain but rather causes him to get shipwrecked? I'm FOR it.
39. Chopper Man Special
Chopper Man has Chopper in a cape. It's worth it for that. Please @ me. Chopper Man, you're my hero, and I hope you one day get a Chopper Man & Sogeking Save The Grand Line special.
38. Romance Dawn
Romance Dawn establishes a lot of things that will become classic tropes in One Piece: Going to a new island, meeting new crew members, helping out little kids, taking out a power hungry warlord, etc. It's a blueprint arc, and it works well as that. Sadly, the anime would not continue the "introduce a Straw Hat character with rad guitar" idea like they do with Zoro here.
37. Orange Town
The East Blue saga only gets better as it goes along, and Orange Town provides a nice counter to Romance Dawn. For example, if Axe-Hand Morgan represented the seriousness of the Marine threat in the last arc, then Buggy represents the other side of the villains that the Straw Hat Crew will encounter: cartoonish, loud, and beaten in a really fun way.
36. Ruluka Island
Ruluka Island feels like condensed One Piece, like you'd just add some water to turn this four episode arc into a twenty episode one. It's a nice arc to stretch your legs in before you go to the big themes of Jaya.
35. Ice Hunter
Ice Hunter is neat because it gives every member of the Straw Hat crew a little time to shine in a story that is action-packed and intriguing. If you miss pre timeskip One Piece and haven't watched the Ice Hunter arc, give it a shot.
34. Marine Rookie
I know that we're all eager to see the Straw Hats reunite in Wano, but if you want to see more of Whole Cake's Sanji Retrieval Team, the Marine Rookie arc makes for a solid bonus round. Also, the only reason it starts is because Luffy eats all of the Straw Hats' supplies, which, logically, should be the beginning of waaaaay more One Piece arcs.
33. Silver Mine
If you didn't get enough Bartolomeo in Dressrosa, then surprise! They made a filler arc just for you.
32. Boss Luffy Specials
You know when you fall asleep watching a show, and then you wake back up and, in your grogginess, suddenly whatever is on TV looks insane? That's what happened to me with Boss Luffy. I had just finished watching Ace's fight with Blackbeard and then, boom. I was out. Then I wake up and see the Straw Hats in 19th century Japan. The Boss Luffy stuff is fun, but I think it's best viewed when you're in a delirious half sleep. That's just my personal preference, though.
31. Caesar Retrieval
Caesar made for a fine antagonist on Punk Hazard, but he's even better as shreiking deadweight that the Straw Hat Crew and Company have to keep alive.
30. Little Garden
Little Garden isn't as cool as Whisky Peak, nor does it provide the emotional gut punch of Drum Island. Instead, it's mainly here to further the theme of what it means to be a true warrior and introduce giants (and dinosaurs!) in the One Piece universe. It gives Usopp some of the character development that he needs and Zoro almost cuts off his own feet in an effort to keep fighting. Any arc that illustrates how hard Zoro goes gets at least one thumb up from me.
29. Loguetown
Loguetown is a fun arc when you consider just how much it expands the scope of the world. Smoker and Tashigi truly begin the Navy's quest to stop the Straw Hats, Dragon gets introduced in a big, mysterious way, and Luffy takes a massive step in establishing himself in the realm of pirating. However, the Straw Hat side stories in the middle (aside from Zoro's awesome bit in the sword shop) slow it down a little.
28. Zou
Zou might be one of the most visually rich arcs in the series. From the massive elephant to the Mink tribe to the terror of Jack to more lessons about the poneglyphs, there's a lot shoved into this short span. And between the intense epics of Dressrosa and Whole Cake Island, it's fits nicely as 10 cc's of wonder and fantasy injected into the New World.
27. Fishman Island
Fishman Island occupies a weird spot. It's thematically heavy, but also serves as the action-packed Straw Hat Crew comeback tour. It needs to stand on its own, but it also caps off with a declaration of war against Big Mom, a villain that won't be encountered for years. In all, I feel that the importance of the Fishman Island arc is yet to be truly realized.
26. Ocean's Dream
One of the final two filler arcs on this list, Ocean's Dream seems like One Piece fan fiction in the best way. If you were dissatisfied with Luffy's fight with Zoro on Whisky Peak, you get another round of it here while Zoro is being mind controlled.
25. Syrup Village
If Romance Dawn and Orange Town were warm up laps, Syrup Village is when One Piece begins to break out in a sprint. The introduction of Usopp and the Going Merry make for some great moments and it's this arc that got me hooked on One Piece when I first started watching it.
24. Dressrosa
Dressrosa, for better (and sometimes for worse) is massive. Doflamingo is a threat that had been popping up since the Jaya arc, but because of Dressrosa's scope, his defeat can feel a little lackluster, especially when you consider that he's a pitstop on the road to Kaido. But Dressrosa introduces the endlessly cool Fujitora and the Straw Hats' big pirate alliance, and also gives us the dual backstories to Law and Doflamingo, neither of which disappoint. Also, Doflamingo's abilities lead to some of the coolest action scenes in the series.
23. Return to Sabaody
The post-timeskip starts with a bang, as the Return to Sabaody arc is both hilarious and thrilling. The Straw Hats get to show off their newfound strength as they do what they definitely couldn't do in the first Sabaody arc (easily knock out a Pacifista). And we also get to meet the Fake Straw Hat crew, which does a nice job of illuminating just how much the legend of the Straw Hats has grown since they were last together.
22. Reverse Mountain
One of the major strengths of One Piece is that it can accomplish three kinds of storytelling at once—giving us a narrative that is immediately satisying, giving us a narrative that will be satisfying in the near future, and giving us a narrative that will be satisfying in the long term. In the Reverse Mountain arc, we not only get a nice story about Laboon, but we also get introduced to Baroque Works (who will be the main antagonists of the saga), and also, we get hints that will only pay off when Brook is introduced years later. Reverse Mountain is short, but it also displays Eiichiro Oda's wonderful talent as a writer.
21. Long Ring Long Land
I've seen people on the internet say stuff like "WHEN I REACHED THE DAVY BACK FIGHT ARC, I NEARLY STOPPED READING!" and man, why? Quitting a series that you love because it slightly diverts from the hero fighting god-like enemies in order to participate in some fun games? Everyone has their own opinions, but your opinion of what fiction should be is wrong. That said, this arc is hilarious and great.
20. Whisky Peak
Whisky Peak is so cool. It's an anime arc with swagger, the kind that steps into a bar and buys everyone a round. I want to be friends with Whisky Peak but I know, deep down, that Whisky Peak is far too rad to be friends with me.
19. Reverie
The best thing about the Reverie arc is that it makes the world of One Piece a little more conveniently manageable (Oh neat. All of the major side characters get to hang out for a while), while also opening a can of worms (What's with the giant straw hat? WHAT'S WITH THE GIANT STRAW HAT?). Because this is the most recent arc, I don't know if we've seen the ripples that it will create across the One Piece world, but I sure am excited to.
18. Post Enies Lobby
This isn't the first time the Straw Hats have been forced to flee a place. However, this is the first time that it's felt like they'd be wiped out if they didn't. The return of Garp (and the spectre of the Yonko) throw the Straw Hats into all new territory, one where maybe being the plucky underdog team isn't enough to save them from the threats that come. Also, goofy Franky joins the team, which provides a nice counter-balance to the hints of oblivion.
17. Punk Hazard
Punk Hazard is home to one of my top 10 One Piece fights (Vergo vs Law & Smoker), features one of my favorite locations (an island that is half fire/magma and half ice/snow and home to an evil science base), and introduces a character that has only grown on me with time (Here's a hint on who he is: He laughs like "SHERURURURURURU SHERURURURURURU). It's kind of a prequel to Dressrosa, but in that spot, does a great job at furthering the menace of Doflamingo.
16. Post War
The introduction of Sabo aka Steampunk Ace aka I'm Just Kidding Sabo Is Kinda Cool and Luffy realizing that he has his crew to keep him going make the Post-War arc into a short but powerful cap to the pre-timeskip era.
15. Amazon Lily
Boa Hancock is a supremely underrated One Piece character, with a terribly sad backstory, amazing powers, and a hilarious crush on Luffy. And Amazon Lily helps further the major trend that will reach fever pitch in Dressrosa of Luffy amassing supporters because he's just such a dang ol' nice guy. Hopefully Hancock will one day meet Bartolomeo and together they will start a Luffy fan club and then argue over who gets to be President.
14. Jaya
If you were in the dark as to what the themes of One Piece are, here comes Jaya with a flashlight. This is basically a montage of the things that are important to the Straw Hat crew, and it introduces Blackbeard, a guy that will go from "Oh he seems interesting" to "OH I HATE HIM" over the next few hundred chapters. Luffy saying "Do I know how to throw a punch, you ask?" before absolutely walloping Bellamy still gives me goose bumps.
13. Thriller Bark
There's so much good to Thriller Bark—the spooky atmosphere, the introduction of Brook, the underrated Gekko Moriah, the Binks' Sake song, the Straw Hats teaming up to face a giant zombie, etc. And just when you think it can't get any better, Kuma shows up and rocks the One Piece world.
12. Impel Down
Hey! It's Buggy! And Mr. 3! And Mr. 2! And Crocodile! And our new best boy Jinbe! And Ivankov! As both a launching point for new protagonists and a comeback for old foes (along with introducing Magellan, one of the best villains in the series, and Shiryu, one of the scariest villains in the series), Impel Down succeeds. I love it more and more with time.
11. Drum Island
I've written an entire article about why the arc where we first meet Tony Tony Chopper makes me weep, so I'll try to be brief here. Drum Island is beautiful. It's the story of a little deer guy that couldn't find a place in the world and the loud rubber bro that gave him one. It's an arc about the price of dreams and the power of having someone stand up for you when you need it most. It's about love and respect and kindess. And now I'm about to cry again. THANKS A LOT, ONE PIECE.
10. Baratie
The Baratie arc is the first hint that we'll get about how hectic the One Piece world is. We meet Sanji, we meet Don Krieg, and we meet Mihawk (and is stronger than the whole cast of the show combined at this point). Syrup Village is about leaving your comfort zones and Baratie is about finding a home in the chaos that follows.
9. G-8
The best One Piece filler arc and the One Piece arc that I most revisit (it's only 11 episodes, can you blame me?), G-8 is a One Piece Greatest Hits collection and possibly the first thing you should show someone if they want to get into One Piece but don't have long to do so.
8. Alabasta
Are the Straw Hats ready for the Grand Line? Are they ready to topple evil villains and protect those that need help? That's what Alabasta asks and the answer is "Oh yeah." Luffy punching Crocodile up through the center of the city is an iconic moment, showing us that the Straw Hats, whether they mean to be or not, are forces of good in the world.
7. Marineford
Marineford is loud and chaotic and powerful, forcing Luffy into a situation where he is simply an especially energetic pawn on the chessboard of battle. It's just as much of a rescue mission as it is a quest for survival for him, but in the midst of Whitebeard and the three admirals and the Shichibukai, Luffy makes his mark. However, he doesn't do it through displays of awe-inspiring force, but through his willpower. Aokiji is right when he says that Luffy isn't "ready for this stage yet," but the thing that scares the Navy most is that one day, he will be.
6. Sabaody Archipelago
This is not a happy arc. It's a satisfying one (Luffy punching the Celestial Dragon will never get old), and it's an illuminating one (Silver Rayleigh, y'all!), but it's not one that will end with cheering. Kizaru shows up to put an entire generation of pirates in their place and Kuma wipes out the Straw Hats. That said, even if it concludes with the most uncertain moment in the series, it's still a fun ride.
5. Arlong Park
Nami is the soul of the Straw Hat Crew, and learning what she's been through at the hands of the despicable Arlong is heart-breaking. But Luffy doesn't need to know every detail to know that he needs to help and the Straw Hats walking to Arlong Park is another one of those "One Piece is literally the best thing ever" moments. And by the end, every Straw Hat bro gets a victory, Luffy gets a bounty, and Nami gets her freedom. And what does she do with this freedom? She joins a ship full of dummies as their navigator. And I'm so happy about that.
4. Enies Lobby
For many, Enies Lobby is THE arc and I'm not disagreeing with them. It's such a display of raw emotion and exciting battles, a nonstop rollercoaster of everything that makes One Piece great. And it ends with a Viking funeral for the Going Merry, a scene that reveals Oda's true power as a writer: He makes you sob about a ship.
3. Whole Cake Island
If Enies Lobby is about being a hero, then Whole Cake Island is about letting that idea go. The Straw Hats can't beat Big Mom or her crew and will have to settle with getting Sanji and getting out. And Katakuri, the protective brother of the Charlotte family, learns that he doesn't have to be perfect all the time. It's a beautiful arc that shows that Oda is willing to play around with some of the pre-established ideas of One Piece.
2. Water 7
Robin leaves. Usopp defects, Luffy is forced to do things that no captain wants to, and a villainous team shows up that seems unstoppable. Water 7 may be the first half of a story that continues with Enies Lobby, but I find it to be the better one (though not by much). It's an arc that constantly leaves you saying "Well, what else could go wrong?" and then something else does. And it's just so good.
1. Skypiea
This is it. Everything good about One Piece, from the powerful villain (with a great weakness), to the touching themes, to enchanting locations, to the gripping adventures, is wrapped up in Skypiea. And while I have no problems with arcs being connected, there's just something about the standalone nature of Skypiea that leads me to regularly revisit it. It's an arc that makes me glad that I started this nearly 900 episode adventure in the first place. And that's the highest compliment that I can give.
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What is your favorite One Piece arc? How do you feel about this ranking? Let us know in the comments!
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Daniel Dockery is a writer and editor for Crunchyroll. He has a Twitter, where you can disagree with him.
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