#planning on falling back into the ace attorney hole

[iturbide]

Happy New Year to all!  May 2023 be a good one 💖

[probablygayattorneys]

So, according to my text log, today marks my third Ace Attorney-versary (well, of rediscovering it, unfortunately we'll never know exactly when I originally got into it). Hard to believe that in just three years, I've played 22 puzzle games (and am in the middle of two more), made friends, got back into sharing my writing and have posted 31 fanfics for a total of 326818 words publicly (and that's not even counting my trio of secret fics that I published anonymously, or the ones I'm still working on), made a semi-successful blog dedicated to puzzle games of the early aughts (I'm sitting at about 400 followers, which is not nothing!), moved (twice!), watched my nuclear family start to fall apart (my mom’s receipt for the divorce lawyer’s retainer is on the fridge, being held up by a magnet of the attorney’s badge), even gotten a tattoo (and am in the processing of working with someone to design a second one), and got semi-engaged and my temporary engagement ring (unfortunately my man has the AUDACITY to live on the other side of the country so I have a different ring than the one he'll actually propose with to signify that I am officially off the market) is even based on Wrightworth colors.

I'm not going to lie and pretend all of the games were incredible feats of the genre (they weren't) or that I've had the best time (in fact, the lowest lows of my mental health have been in the past three years), or that everyone I've met has been so wonderful and welcoming (you asshole anons and certain characters know who you are) but considering that I didn't plan any of this, I basically just stumbled into owning a switch and then @vaptainhammer, knowing that I used to love Ace Attorney, bought me the switch port of the originally trilogy and shoved me down the rabbit hole in the process, I'm grateful I had the experience. Here's to Phoenix, to the Laytons, to Ashley and Kyle, and to Vivian, Abby, Zieg, Ash, everyone else that Sissel dragged in, and of course, my love, my first and my last, my alpha and my omega, my number one puzzle assistant, my personal google, the one who started all of this is the first place and has stood by my side through all the ups and downs that life has thrown at me over the past three years, Blayne. I love you so much, forever, and I can't wait until we're able to bring the government into our relationship and I can start the rest of my life as your hersband, Mx. Vaptainhammer.

Can't promise I'll be helming this blog for another three years, but thank you to everyone who had climbed aboard at any point, and welcome to everyone who will, I hope you've enjoyed the thoughtless shitposts and the thoughtful and deeply cared about edits and meta posts, and are ready for more because I've got a full queue that grows every day. I may not go down with this ship but for everything else, I've had the time of my life fighting (the Defiant) dragons with you.

[gumdefense]

Iris Fey <3

THANK YOU FOR ASKING ABOUT IRIS I’M TAKING THIS OPPORTUNITY TO TALK ABOUT HER AS MUCH AS I WANT APOLOGIES IN ADVANCE (and apologies for answering late)

I love her so much idk how to describe it. She is everything. She’s such a kind and gentle person, and she cares and loves so much which fits so well with Phoenix. She helped dahlia make the initial plan to steal the diamond and get away from their fucked family, she kept helping her with criminal plans from then on because she just loves her sister even if she wasn’t particularly happy about the path she was starting to go on, she volunteered to get the necklace back for her. You know the necklace full of poison. That dahlia used to (nearly) kill someone. She knew what it was, and still wanted to help her (at her own risk, might I add) because dahlia is and always will be her sister, and if she soiled her own hands to try to get her “off the sinful path” or however she worded it, so be it.

And then Phoenix. I think a lot about how she came to fall for him. Because she can’t have loved him immediately, there must have been a period where she didn’t have any feelings and just wanted the damn necklace, but was unable to get it. Can you imagine ? Realising she was getting attached to this man ? Realising she was actually falling for him, the very last thing that she should do ? I wanna know what this specific period of time was like for her so bad.

And in subject to how she loves— we all know the rest. She knitted that horrible sweater for him, which is by itself insane btw like that takes an enormous amount of time, effort, and money (with how much yarn has to be used). And it looks like a really complicated sweater honestly ! Like it looks quite thick instead of being a simple single layer, and— idk what the right wording would be, but ”doesn’t have holes”-y. It looks really well made. That is absolute smitten behaviour it’s hilarious and adorable

But most importantly, she went against her sister’s wishes, because of how much she ended up loving him. The same sister she loved so much as well. We know she wasn’t really happy with dahlia’s actions at this point, and she wanted to save her from sinning further etc, but as established, that was from a source of love. She knew dahlia could be different in the right environment. She believed in her. But somehow, for some reason, she loved Phoenix enough that, as she says, if she knew dahlia’s plan to kill him- she would have stopped her even if it meant one of their lives

There’s another thing about iris that I love, which is that she’s just as crazy as everyone else. We always joke about every character being insane and she is no exception

I do have thoughts about the decision to have her portrayed so… gentle, specifically in regards to how ace attorney treats women in general. I do think it’s kind of meh that the perfect female love interest (as she is sort of depicted I think, based on how the game ends hinting at her and Phoenix still having feelings for each other) is a “loves others so much she makes herself suffer” character. While her evil twin is an evil woman !! Who hates men and people in general !! And is mean and the opposite of caring !! (I’ve grown to really like dahlia too and to find her fascinating as a character, but I think with the way the game was written and how it portrayed her, you’re meant to dislike her)

But, in my biased purely subjective opinion, she is so fucking amazing and I just love her

And this part of her of caring about others to the point of self sabotage makes her connection with Phoenix so interesting. Because that’s exactly how he is, too. He loves and cares so deeply, and he constantly puts others before himself and places his own self-esteem and self-worth on how much he can help people; especially those he loves, i.e. maya, edgeworth, trucy… even apollo and athena based on how much he looks down on himself for his errors as a mentor in aa5. But of course, also iris. As he denied even after the trial that the woman at the witness stand was her, that she could have killed Doug and said those cruel things to him, and that she could have killed Misty, even after 5 years of not having seen her. Their relationship is built with two people who care so, so deeply, and for whom this amount of devotion they always show to loved ones ended up dooming their relationship to each other. Phoenix couldn’t give up the necklace, iris couldn’t take it away from him. I’m a narumitsu endgame kinda guy, but feenris is so incredibly compelling and narratively interesting I’m so unwell about them

Ahem. This long rant aside. What I mean by “most fandom takes are incorrect” is that !! No !! She is not some evil liar that didn’t give a shit about Phoenix and just cared about her selfish desires !! What the fuck !! And she did not fucking “rape him by deception” holy shit !! Like that’s such an insane thing to say, and shows a lack of understanding of what rape by deception is. ALSO: she is a huge victim of… how shall I call it. Gay shipper misogyny ? Let’s go with that. The phenomenon of people hating the guts of a female character for no reason other than “she gets in-between the two men I ship”. I’m not saying it would be the only reason someone would hate her; if you hate her that’s your business and it’s fine, but I’ve definitely seen people acting like she is wayyy worse than she is, and not so subtly showing what their real problem is is that there’s another character who could be a love interest for Phoenix instead of edgeworth. Tldr people are so mean to her :(

And what I mean by lost potential is that I think she could’ve been a lot more. This ties into the kinda misogynistic writing I touched on earlier. I don’t have a great explanation for this honestly, I just have this feeling she could’ve been a top 10 character if she was given a bit more time and more depth. Like if her fucked up parts like being willing to kill dahlia or herself was shown a bit more idk. Like I said I don’t really know how to explain this part. She should’ve been written more as her own character, a bit less as Girl In Love With Phoenix. Which ties with “not enough canon”

And for underrated, well that’s because no one appreciates her rip

This ended up being long as hell lmao anon I hope this is a good answer for you !! And thanks again for asking me I am so happy to talk about iris. Genuinely one of my favourite characters <33 I hope this is coherent I wrote all this late at night when I really should be sleeping as I’m supposed to wake up early tomorrow. But iris is of course more important

[askaceattorney]

Dear Asexual-Deesasters,

Mod Edgeworth: 

If you want to know the answer to that question, go to this link.

Dear Skibot99,

Co-Mod: I’m fairly certain it was The Mod, but I don’t know for sure.  He actually had another one before it, made from an old Ace Attorney musical animation.  I haven’t been able to locate that video, unfortunately, but here’s the old banner:

Ah...  Those were good days.  Good days.

Dear Dawsongfg,

Co-Mod: It’s fine.  Besides, it won’t be too long before those letters are accepted, so maybe we’ll hold onto them until that time.

Dear skibot99 again,

Mod Edgeworth: The Lost Turnabout hands down. All logic is thrown out the window the moment Phoenix had amnesia. It’s clear the Judge knew something was wrong with Phoenix, so why didn’t he call for a recess or check on Phoenix? Not to mention Wellington was annoying. He’s probably the only character I would be hesitant to play as when answering letters, if only because he was so unbearable.

As for Turnabout Ablaze, I do agree that it is a drag to get through in the end, though the entire game of AAI was boring, aside from the game mechanics. As a case by itself, I wouldn’t put it as my least favorite, if only because I did get some funny parts out of it.  It also contributed to the overall story, whereas The Lost Turnabout could just be taken out and it wouldn’t effect the overarching plot.

Co-Mod: I’d probably have to go with Turnabout Big Top.  I honestly couldn’t figure out the part where you have to present Max’s poster without consulting a walkthrough.  Why couldn’t we just present Max himself?  Besides that, the ending was largely underwhelming -- the murder weapon was hidden under Acro’s blanket the entire time, but instead of seeing a screenshot of it there, we just have to imagine it.  Maybe it was a filler case, but that was no excuse for it to end so poorly.  Not to mention one of the witnesses was a literal puppet.

It’s hard truth, Trilo.  Live with it.

Dear skibot99 and Anonymous,

Mod Edgeworth: I… think I heard from her when the localization of DGS was announced? I know Mod Kristoph and Mod Maya introduced themselves when I came into the group. There’s a third person, but I only heard from her once. As for what’s going on with her… I don’t know.

As for the flooding the inbox, it’s fine. I won’t promise a letter or two won’t be deleted, but we may make an exception and I’d hardly consider 4-5 different letters flooding the inbox. However, I do highly suggest lowering your letter sending to no more than three a day to prevent deletion of your letters. The only time I’d say your letters are flooding the inbox is when you’re sending 10-20 of them, especially of the same letter, and we have to scroll down for a while to get to the next letter. We will only choose three out of that pile and delete the rest.

And yes, we do have a few that send us 10-20 of the same letter to multiple characters in the span of five minutes. Geez.

Co-Mod: Mod Paups has had to remain absent for personal reasons, and sadly, has recently communicated to me that she wishes to leave the blog entirely.  Thanks for all you’ve contributed to this blog, Mod Paups, and best of luck in whatever you do next!

(Referenced Letter)

Dear mungeondaster,

Mod Edgeworth: Since I answered this one, I shall answer your letter.

(^ Why do I always use this sprite? ^) Actually, the localization never specified if Manfred Von Karma was born in Germany or not. In fact, we never knew the German part until Justice For All when Franziska Von Karma was stated to have flown all the way from Germany. It never specifies any reason for this and fans were quick to jump to the conclusion that it means the Von Karma family were German, which… isn’t entirely true? Manfred Von Karma never said he lived in Germany and, for all we know, Franziska could’ve lived in Germany to study law or something.

Now, the OG does give us more specific detail on this, being why I answered this the way I did. In the OG, both Von Karma’s were born Japanese, but lived in America or at least have an estate there. It specified that they were originally born in Japan, which would be translated to LA, California in the localization. While using the OG canon isn’t normal here, I will use it, if the localization doesn’t specify things. In this case, it never specified if the Von Karma’s were born in Germany or if Manfred Von Karma lived in America. Since he had to wait out the Statue of Limitations for DL-6, we can assume he lived in LA for 15 years or more. That means he’s American.

I am still getting the hang of writing letters, but I try to stick to canon as much as possible. If you believe we’ve made an error in our letters, feel free to let us know, but also show proof, if we go against canon. We’ll be sure the letter is sent to the right mod or else fix it.

Dear  Bluedragoncody,

Mod Edgeworth: I... don’t know how to feel about that.

Also, I accidentally deleted your previous letter before this one when trying to post it on here. I’m so sorry about that. If you could remember it, would you send it again?

Co-Mod: I’ll just respond to this with an old classic:

Dear Aceattorneyismyjam,

Mod Edgeworth: I-I’m not a pro! I accidentally deleted an important mod question from bluedragoncody, because of my inexperience. Oof! Again, so sorry!

Granted, I am good with digital art and writing essays, but I’m still trying to get the hang of being a mod here. Believe me, I do get corrected on several mistakes I do here. I can’t really call myself a pro just yet. I’ve only just started becoming a mod here last month lol

Dear Dahlia,

Mod Edgeworth: I thank you for your support of this blog and my essay. Manfred Von Karma is also my favorite villain and someone I do feel is underestimated as a one dimensional villain. I think people hate him so much, because of how he ruined Miles Edgeworth’s life without looking at the bigger picture. They focus on the bad things with their black colored glasses without dissecting Manfred Von Karma’s character as a whole. 

One thing I love about this blog, even before becoming a mod, is that no one here ever portrayed Manfred Von Karma as the one dimensional villain. He can be snappy at times, but as proven in many of our previous letters, he’s also portrayed as being calm when threatened, polite at times and absolutely loves his wife and children. Yes, he’s a terrible person, but that’s what makes him so interesting. He’s a bad, evil person that does good things from time to time. It doesn’t justify any of his horrible deeds, murder included, but it does make him human.

Co-Mod: I’m...going to assume you’re a different Dahlia.  (I’m grabbing a Magatama of Parting just in case, though.  I’m sure you can understand.)

Anyway, thanks for being such a loyal follower!  This blog’s been through a lot of changes since it began, and since I joined it back in 2017, so I’m glad it’s still a good source of enjoyment for you.  I’ve seen all sorts of cringe by now, by the way (some of which I wrote myself), so don’t worry about it.

I’m also glad that the characters still sound like themselves and not like us.  The hilarious personalities and quirks given to them by Capcom’s writers, as well as the humanity in so many of them, make them easy to relate to, and thus fairly easy to mimic.  I may have said something like this before, but I see myself in a lot of them -- in Athena’s fear of inadequacy, in Apollo’s desire for justice in a world where it’s hard to find, in Sebastian’s confusion about where to go next after his world falls apart, and possibly even in the von Karmas’ desire for perfection.  I of course identify with their positive feelings as well -- Phoenix’s smugness when he gets things right, Athena’s joy after pulling off a victory in court, Adrian’s pride after her self-confidence is restored, etc. -- but there’s something about the struggles they face that make them easier to relate to, on top of being that much more awesome in the end.

Unfortunately, I can’t promise anything about this blog continuing on in perpetuity.  For one thing, I don’t plan on being around forever (I’m fairly certain the other Mods don’t, either), and for that matter, there’s also no telling how long Tumblr will be around.  All I can promise is that I’ll give my best while I’m here, and that the love from you and everyone else who shares it here is sure to be what keeps us going.  Thank you for your contribution!

Dear TurqouiseJavelin,

Mod Edgeworth: Hm... not bad ideas. Though, we mods choose our own mod names under the condition that it doesn’t match anyone else’s mod name.

Co-Mod: What Mod Edgeworth said.  Choosing the name “Mod Athena” may or may not increase your chances of being hired, though.  *wink, wink*

Dear Anonymous, 

Mod Edgeworth: Actually, Gregory was stated in the Autopsy to have died by a gunshot. However, you do bring up something interesting. If Gregory Edgeworth realized he was dead and last remembered Robert Hammond strangling him, he wouldn’t think “I died by the shot of a gun.” Since the Detectives weren’t aware that victim had died unconscious, they’d assume the victim would recall being shot and killed. This makes me wonder if Gregory Edgeworth was channeled, but never brought to court to be cross-examined.

There are still holes, but I do like your aspect on DL-6.

Co-Mod: Dang...  No matter how many times you come back to this game, there’s always something new to think about.  I honestly hadn’t considered those details about Yanni Yogi’s trial.  Your explanation makes the most sense to me, but there’s one other possibility regarding Gregory’s testimony -- he may have chosen to lie about who murdered him in order to protect his son from a murder charge.  That’s all open to interpretation, of course, so your guess is as good as ours.

It’s a good thing we’re not actual defense attorneys, huh?

-The Mods

[rosecorcoranwrites]

Thoughts on Twists

Every story ever told can be broken down into three parts. The beginning. The middle. And the twist!

—Goosebumps (2015)

Jordan Peele’s Us and M. Night Shyamalan’s The Village Spoilers ahead, so read with caution!

There's something about a good plot twist: the shock, the awe, the feeling of having your world turned upside down. A good twist might make you see a character in a new light, or rethink everything you thought you knew about the setting. A bad twist, on the other hand, can ruin an otherwise decent story. Bad twists feel cheap and stupid, and make what might have been good, even great stories into muddled and unbelievable messes. So what makes a twist good or bad?

First, some preliminaries: what is a twist? Although we all use the phrase "twists and turns", I submit that a plot twist is a little different than a plot turn. A turn might be defined as the plot taking a completely unexpected direction, like "Wow! Who would have thought that guy would end up becoming the villain!". On the other hand, a twist is when we learn an unexpected fact about the world or a character that had been there, secretly, all along: "Wow! Who would have thought that guy was the villain the whole time!".

Since we're on the subject, it should be noted that twist villains are not the only type of twist there is. Nor are twist endings, the quote from Goosebumps notwithstanding. Though twists tend to occur towards the latter part of narratives, they can be sprinkled throughout. I would love to give some examples of this, but one of the problems with talking about good twists is that you don't want to give them away, and talking about them almost invariably does just that.

Obviously, a twist ought to be unpredictable, but a predictable twist does not make a bad story. Erased, which is one of four perfect stories in existence, has a twist you can see coming from a mile away, and yet it remains perfect. Why? First, because the story doesn't hinge on the twist, for one thing; it's cat and mouse, so it's okay if we know who the cat is. Second, a twist that is predictable isn't really a twist. I mean, it is but it isn't; it's one of those weird gray areas of trying to be the thing, but failing. But that's okay. A failed attempt at being a twist is, in my mind, not the same thing as a properly executed but just plain bad twist. But maybe we're getting into the weeds a bit.

I would say that a bad twist is any twist that is not a good twist, and a good twist follows certain rules: it must be believable; it must make sense in retrospect; and, for double twists, the second one must make the story better as a whole. Basically, good twists are satisfying, and bad twists aren't, usually because they break one of the three rules.

Rule 1: A twist must be believable!

By this, I mean believable in whatever world the writer has set up. If supernatural elements are established, or at least hinted at, a supernatural twist is fine. If, however, there is not one hint or peep of the supernatural throughout the story, but it turns out that the killer is a wizard, or an alien, or a ghost, it's awful. Sure, it's unexpected, but in the dumbest way possible. Good twists should be like slight-of-hand; the audience should delight at being fooled. Unbelievable twists feel more like being lied to by someone who's really bad at lying. They feel like an insult.

And don't think that introducing random supernatural elements into a story is the only way to be unbelievable. Sometimes, making a "real world" twist can feel just as unrealistic. I'll say as little as I can, because it's still less than a year old, but I think that Jordan Peele's Us pulls this. I was really excited for that movie when I saw the trailers, and then I read the synopsis and got even more excited, because I hoped that he would try a certain twist. And he did, and I think it's brilliant! But he went for another twist as well (the one that occurs first in the film, actually), which kind of ruins the whole movie. Why? Because that first twist is logistically, financially, geographically, and hereditarily unbelievable (in particular, (SPOILER, obviously): it's idiotic that the child doppelgängers are the offspring of the cloned parents, and not clones of the normal kids. Even if the clone parents had sex at the exact same time as the normal parents, the sperm and egg that happen to unite would be totally random, even accepting the ridiculous idea that the mother clone would ovulate at the same time as the normal mother. Never mind the rest of the absurdity of a vast government(?) clone experiment that just leaves an unlocked exit in a beachside funhouse). It took what could have been a great movie and made it seem fake and silly. I know I wrote a whole post about not being harsh on the plot holes in horror movies, but this particular twist is based on real things in the real world, not monsters or spirits or what have you (and seriously, a mysterious, ever-changing-yet-always-present carnival funhouse that inexplicable spits out doppelgängers from time to time is way scarier than a poorly run scientific experiment). It strains the suspension of disbelief. It's too much to take. Quite simply, I don't buy it. And a good twist should never make the audience say "I don't buy it."

Rule 2: A twist must make sense in retrospect!

The best twists are those that are staring you in the face the whole time. Once you finally learn the truth, you should be able to look back and say, "I can't believe I didn't see that coming!". As an example of such a twist is M. Night Shyamalan's The Visit. Every time I watch that movie with someone who hasn't seen it, it strikes me just how obvious the twist is, and yet no one ever guesses it.

Bad twists tend to come out of left field, or else don’t mesh with what came before. They feel like the writers are cheating by not giving you anything to go off of, but still want you to cheer for them anyway. Hans being the villain in Frozen is one such twist. His early actions in the film don’t jive with his take-the-throne scheme, specifically in that he stops Weselton’s men from killing Elsa in her palace. Why does he do this? The only reason I can think of, given that he was just going to have her executed later anyway, is so the audience wouldn’t know he’s a villain. It’s not in character and doesn't make sense when you learn what he was eventually planning.

Part of making sense in retrospect is having clues to the twist throughout the rest of the story. These might be seemingly unimportant, mundane details that the audience passes over, or they might be red herrings that seem to indicate one thing but actually mean something quite different. Either way, once the twist is revealed, those clues should become obvious. The Ace Attorney games excel at this. There was a case I was playing, and, after finally eliminating one of the two main suspects, I was stumped. If it wasn’t one of those two, who was it? I pulled up the cast list and went one by one, slowly eliminating the impossible until I was left with one improbable suspect. “No,” I thought, “it can’t be them. But, it can’t be anyone else, so…Wait!” Like puzzle pieces falling into place, everything suddenly fit. That person not only had to be the killer because no one else could, it made sense for them to be the killer given all of their past actions.

A twist that I’m not a fan of is the one in And Then There Were None, by Agatha Christie. Before you grab your pitchforks and torches, let me explain for those people who have never read the book: ten strangers meet on an island and are killed, one-by-one, for their past misdeeds. While the book is entertaining and is the granddaddy of all such whittling-down-the-cast who-dun-its, the twist itself is kind of… meh. Yes, the killer’s motive makes sense, but there weren’t any clues or details one could look back on and say, “Ah! Of course! I was blind not to see it!” The little twist as to how they accomplished some of the killings was clever, but as for their identity, well… I feel like Christie could have chosen any of the ten and done the same thing with them. Nothing pointed to that one person in particular being the killer, and it made the whole twist a lot less satisfying.

Rule 3: Double twists must make the story better as a whole!

Double twists are those where one twist comes after another. The second twist can either build on the first one, or subvert it. As an author, I can tell you that double twists are a nice way of covering your bases, because even if someone sees the first twist coming, they usually won’t see the second one. As a reader, I’m crazy about double twists. And yet, people either misuse them by having them make the story worse or don’t use them to make the story better. Basically, a bad double twist is one of those that breaks rule 1 or 2. Sometimes, though, a really good double twist can salvage a single twist that breaks either of these rules, assuming that the story isn't too far gone at that point (Jordan Peele, I'm looking at you).

Let’s take at movie with a double twist, and see if it works or not: M. Night Shyamalan’s The Village. Shyamalan is quite...something, in that he soars to heights and sink to depths in terms of quality. On a scale of The Happening to The Visit (I don’t acknowledge the existence of The Last Airbender or After Earth; they're not Shyamalanian enough), I would say that The Village is just above Lady in the Water but below Glass. Don’t get me wrong, there are parts of The Village that were quite scary and interesting, but its twists? They're just not doing it for me.

SPOILERS, I guess, but this movie's been out for fifteen years, and the twists are nothing great, so, here we go: it turns out the monsters in the woods are actually villagers in suits who deter people from leaving the community, and—double twist—the movie takes place in the modern day, but the village’s inhabitants experienced loss and crime in regular society and formed their weird community in the woods in order to raise their children peacefully. This second twist was neither believable nor hinted at. For example, why do all the adults—all of whom presumably grew up in normal society—use a stilted, old-timey speech (other than to fool the audience on time period)? Also, though we know the elders have secrets they keep in black boxes, we’re never shown even a hint that these might be things from the modern era until the ending. Why not have a full color photo, or an anachronistic piece of technology? The audience would think these were goofs or sloppy filmmaking, until the reveal that it was all part of a carefully set-up twist.

I’m not a fan of the fake-monster twist either, because I’m always in favor of supernatural elements, but it’s not bad in and of itself. If it were the only twist in the film, it would be an okay movie. But that second one, well…It doesn’t make the film better—I think most people would agree it makes it worse—so it’s not a good double twist. How would I fix it? Add one more twist. The blind girl goes into the woods to get medicine, and is attacked by the murderer in a monster suit, just like in the original movie. Only this time, rather than luring him into a hole, she is saved by another creature. “Who’s that?” the audience wonders, until it rips the murderer apart with its claws and then gallops away on all fours or climbs up a tree or something, because—plot twist—there really are monsters out there in the woods! Like I said, I’m always in favor of the supernatural (Besides, the elders do say that they based the creatures off local legends). At this point, you can keep the modern-day twist or not (if you do, I would move the monster fight to after she’s coming home with the medicine). This new twist wouldn’t make it the best movie ever or anything, but it would make it a little better, a little scarier, a bit more unsettling. If the modern setting stays, this twists hits home the already-present-but-somewhat-undercut message that you can try to make a perfect, planned life, but there are still things out there you can't control. I think it would make for a more satisfying story over all.

And that, right there, is what should be at the heart of any twist (or, dare I say it, any story element): satisfying the audience. No one goes into a book or a movie or a game wanting to be lied to or cheated. We want to be dazzled, amazed, maybe even fooled but in a way that we can appreciate. We want a twist that will knock our socks off and change everything we thought we knew, while being right in front of us the whole time. But, honestly, we'll settle for a not-so-mind-blowing twist that at least satisfies our need for a good story. Heck, we'll even take a predictable twist, as long as the story itself is good. Why? Because surprising your audience is a bonus, but satisfying them is a necessity. And that is what a good twist does.

[cryptobioticseraphim]

its loving max hours

im such a fucking fool for falling for 2 of the same type of bastard lol while molly’s a lot more genuine than max is, the similarities are similar enough that im gay for max and thats good enough. i already have a basic idea for my s/i which also taps into my clown special interest!!!!! Spoilers for Turnabout Big Top from ace attorney 2!

ASCII is my s/is clown name! His real name is of course just my name, Lumikko. I’m just gonna say ASCII for the sake of convenience for now. He’s Moe’s apprentice/assistant. ASCII is a lot more into the actual performance of being a clown rather than just telling jokes and is really good at making balloon animals! He’s more of a typical birthday party clown, I guess. Anyways! He’s been around for about a year before the The Accident and ends up sympathizing hardcore with Acro because ASCII’s legs and spine are slowly deteriorating from an unknown chronic condition. ASCII can still walk, just typically with a cane unless his pain is manageable that day. anyways! Max shows up to save the circus financially and makes his comment about Moe and it really bothers ASCII. Max was a dick to him just like the rest of the circus, until he shows ASCII his Grand Prix picture. ASCII is absolutely enamored with the genuine emotion of “every performer should feel this feeling of absolute joy,” and ASCII talks about how he gets that feeling every time he makes a kid smile. They have quite a bit of deep talk about how performing is so extremely important to them in their own ways and ASCII becomes the person Max goes to for almost anything personal and they become the best of friends. ASCII then realizes that he’s caught feelings for Max, the genuinely sweet Max. but he’s been talking with him about Max’s big crush on Regina and he’s absolutely heartbroken. ASCII consults Moe about it and they decide that ASCII is gonna go big or go home and plan a big confession. Unfortunately while they were assembling some bouquets in Moe’s room for said confession, they hear the big thump that Moe describes in his testimony and ASCII is absolutely in shambles when he sees Max’s silhouette and breaks down when he sees the corpse of the ringmaster. Von Karma forces ASCII to testify against Max and gives a similar testimony to Moe, but with less jokes. ASCII’s whole testimony is full of holes because of how scared of Von Karma they are. Their last testimony is just: “I CAN’T BELIEVE MAX DID THIS. HE’D NEVER DO THIS, BUT I SAW IT! I SAW IT! MY OWN BEST FRIEND DID THIS!” and he starts sobbing and ruins his makeup. Obviously this is proven false and after the trial is over, ASCII gives Max a big hug and quickly rushes back to the big top to where he quickly sets up his props for the confession to surprise Max when he comes back.

The confession actually goes a lot better than expected with Max accepting, despite his feelings for Regina. Mainly because of how much emotion ASCII showed in his testimony and Max absolutely fell in love. anyways im big gay

[mostlylawyertrash]

I’m depressed so I wrote a fill for the ace attorney kink meme and ended up posting it for once but yeah heavy drinking and depression under the read about 1000 words wright blackquill klavier centric no pairings

Phoenix Wright sat at the second last bar stool, hunched over as though he guarded the corner jukebox. The directly overhead yellow light fixture exaggerated the bags under his eyes, and stubble over his cheeks. His hands rested on the counter, finger tips never leaving a short glass filled with clear liquid and three cubes of ice. Each time he brought the glass to his lips he grimaced, returning the empty glass to a row of three and then tapping the bar for a refill. The barmaid wandered over in her own time and Phoenix Wright did not rush her, mumbling a thank you as she gave him another clean glass. The disjointed voice of Elvis Presley's I Can't Help Falling In Love finally began to fade out, only for the melody to begin again on repeat. "You know, he used to bring me here, Olga," he said, voice not yet slurred but intoxicated enough for the smell to hit each time he opened his mouth. The poor blonde nodded her head and went back to cleaning the glasses he'd already used, because the miserable lawyer was still better companionship than any of the other patrons. "Yeah, Mr Wright?" she asked in feigned interest, hoping to coax him into another monologue. Under her boss's guidelines, it wouldn't be considered rude to ignore the drunkards on the other end of the bar if she was listening. Phoenix Wright nodded slowly in acknowledgement; the bar stool squealed as he reached for the drink. "Yeah," he said more quietly again. "We should leave," Klavier whispered to his cohort, the recently exonerated Simon Blackquill. The celebratory atmosphere that had been building since the plans were made in the break room had died, as they shared a notion of disgust at the sight. Klavier had begun to pale with memories that were not his own - that man, in this bar, with the same blonde waitress. Blackquill was more accurately enraged, as the taste of vodka would forever be ruined by this memory. They hadn't taken a seat or ordered, but the window of escape became a narrowing slither as the witness suddenly looked up. "Can I get you boys anything?" Orla called across the room, before they had made it to the exit. Phoenix Wright turned to look at the unusual late comers, eyes flickering with some vague emotion before recognition destroyed the fantasy. He offered a smile that spread uncannily over his face, not at all reaching his heavy eyebrows and otherwise pathetic expression. "Blackquill, Gavin, take a seat," he said, patting one of the many empty chairs around him. They had been caught, and with no justification for their hasty retreat they quietly approached. Blackquill's first error was taking the seat directly next to the defence attorney, who less than graciously patted his shoulder. Phoenix Wright was nothing, if not a friendly shell. "Kris will have the regular, and what do you drink Blackquill?" The mistaken name was entirely accidental, a drunken misstep of the tongue, but Klavier visibly flinched. Blackquill became a wall between them, slouching the slightest bit forward to completely block visual contact. "I don't drink," he said sternly, but Wright's response came in an unbelieving hiss. "You look like a gin sort of man. A gin and apple, Orla," Wright said to the barmaid, missing her sceptical gaze. Blackquill quickly corrected the order: a diet coke, no ice. She pulled a bottle from the fridge and slung it down the bar to him, returning with a scotch on the rocks for the rockstar. Klavier immediately downed it, as though it might have been a vaccine against Wright's contagious depression. She offered another but he refused with a silent, dismissive gesture. He had at least expected small talk, or idle banter about the prosecution's sub-par court performance hours before, but Wright stayed silent and drank. Sometimes Klavier would try to break the silence, smiling at Blackquill or opening his mouth as if to start a conversation, but then Wright would cough or knock for another drink. His expression was vacant, beyond the moments of stress that they sometimes glimpsed in court. His general well-meaning nature had left with the man's dignity and optimism, to leave a weary figure that hummed along to the queue of I Can't Help Falling In Love. His lips were dry, almost cracked as he hoarsely whispered the opening verse for the fourth time. The ice in Klavier's glass has melted, and he spun the water as an aimless distraction. With half a bottle glass of warm temperature, flat coke left, Blackquill had enough. He slammed his fist into the bar with enough force to make all their glasses slide an inch, and poor Klavier flinched so violently he dropped his phone. Wright continued to hum, body swaying weakly to the tune. "Bloody hell, no wonder all the people around you act so much maturer than their age. They're growing up fast to keep up with your bullshit." Blackquill began to shout, until Orla told him to quiet down. She had found a broom already, sweeping up the pieces of Klavier's shattered phone screen, before Klavier could attempt to pick it off the flattened carpet with his bare fingers. Phoenix Wright stayed where he was like a disgraced idol figure, who had only now stopped singing that god-awful song under his breath. Blackquill almost spat, tossing enough money onto the counter to cover his and Klavier's drinks. The night would have been over, if it had ever actually begun. "Phoenix Wright, you are a fool." Wright stared at him, stared so long it became clear he was not staring at him at all. Blackquill stood and turned to Klavier, with a gentle hand on his back. "We should be departing." Klavier, stunned, nodded and began turning on the stool. He finished Blackquill's coke and said goodbye to the other patron, who had silently returned to his vodka. As they moved towards the door, Blackquill made his second error of the evening. He looked back at Wright, whose hands had finally left the benchtop and now cupped his face. Under his suit jacket, which now looked too big on his jagged shoulder bones, his body wracked with muted sobs, and Blackquill had seen enough. He pulled the heavy wooden door closed behind him, locking the misery in the Borscht Bowl Club while he and Klavier moved into the Japanifornian night life. Borscht Bowl Club maintained it's ill formed reputation: a shit-hole in the wall where the great went to die.

[bluekitsune]

late NDRV3 Chapter 5 impressions

Ok So Momota is being a massive fucking prick right off the bat. Like “Oh well I guess we did survive because you revealed the truth but I’m still gonna give you the cold shoulder because you were supposed to be on my side not on Ouma’s even if looking away would’ve killed us all ANYWAY”

IS...... the school....... is this a rocket......... are you fucking kidding me? Please let me be wrong

Are they in space? Did I stumble into another 999 bullshit??????

They’re obviously going to turn out being the Golsomething plan people (or not) and they were there to make sure it succeeded. Now I’m thinking. If there’s some bullshit of Despair going on again, could the Mastermind have created the meteor shower?

Noooooooooooooo thay compressor is a complete and total death flag on Kibo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Plot Twist: Kibo has a Naegi alter ego inside him??????? That’s what I’m leaning into believing at this point

I’m gonna be so sad when he dies :C I don’t even have hope anymore tbh

Ouma pulling some Komaeda bullshit. But TBH I’ll stick with Komaeda any time. Even his despair bullshit is a lot better than Ouma’s bullshit

Magical Girl Hammers huh

Oh my god. Ok so THAT’s what was in Amami’s BG.

Ouma is like a collage of all the Mastermind theories and Monokuma gijinkas I’ve laid my fucking eyes on,down to the black and white scheme. but somehow eGdiEr wow. Idk I just wanna rip that scarf off and choke him.  It’s so easy to fall on the hate or love with this kind of character. I mean, Shinguuji was very childishly delusional but I’d still stick with him. Or something. I’m very confused

How out of options where these guys? A Robot? Seriously? If you need to repopulate why would you count him as a human????? No healer in the crew? Are you guys fucking stupid? Send a sick half baked astronaut along? Fucking dicks. This is the worst “Seeds of Humanity” bullshit I’ve seen and I’ve read a lot of shitty things

Ok so does Kibo breathe? If Kibo didn’t breathe he could hypothetically scout the outside and come back with information. If there really is a way to revive the students, then they should be able to get everyone back and have Iruma make shit to help the outside, just like Towa city.

:C I hope the SDR2 crew is ok probably not . Just imagine Hajizuru and Ko and Gundam and Sonia fine aged like wine damn

Ok, this can’t be the entire twist; There’s no way they’re just handing it down so easily no matter how shitposty this is.  So Ouma could have either KILLED the mastermind and hijacked the whole thing, or he could be going along with another “suggestion”. Or the simplier option, he just found the remote control laying around the Mecha’s room.

He would be the obvious “traitor” and idrk where this is going

MMMMmmmm Is there going to be 6 chapters like the tradition? I don’T KNOW GOD

AH THERE IT GOES. I knew it couldn’t be separate from the other games >:C Is the voice insde Kibo Chiaki? I’m going nuts trying to resolve what is it

Lack of options is because of Space Aids aka Radical 6 huh. Wow... An assassin, an evil leader........ does Kibougamine ever do psychiatric checks before admitting students tho? C’mon Naegi you should’ve learned this far in

NGL I think Momota is gonna be dead, either in a pool of blood or something else. I really like how the group is going now. >C I don’t want anyone else to die goddingit

Really looking forwards to Spoiler-chan

Kibo maybe you shouldn’t be around the Electric bomb you DIPSHIT

SHIT MAN. Not even glanced at the crime scene and it’s already like one of those extreme bullshit cases from Ace Attorney. 

???, aka Amami’s talent, was finally murdered after he fleed his owner. RIP, Amami’s talent, Anon-kun

Maki is already jumping into concluding the body is Momota without a shred of grief? I don’t buy it. She knows something. Also, is this going to be a death caused by illness at last?????? Cuz the compressor wouldn’t trigger if it detected living organic matter amirite

Hmm So Yumeno sneaked Momota the crossbow and the bottles? Was Momota trying to question Ouma to find out if he’s really the Mastermind? The translator is a little unsure of the bottle title so I’m not sure what it actually is

Is it poison or some truth serum? HM the clothes are really weird. Kibo shoving his hand on toilets just like James huuhhhhhhh

Maki used her hammer early to let Monokuma go from the Mechas that were stopping him but why? Is the Mastermind going to be knotted into this mess again? That’s a load of crap man

I really don’t know what to expect

OK SO STOP with the voices WHICH ONE IS IT. This mecha bullshit needs to stop Why is Momota pretending to be Ouma? They can’t be riding on the same thing. But caught off guard the voice goes back to Momota’s

How can he mimic Ouma’s speech like that? This is some grade A bullshit (it’s probably the Mecha but IDK still pointless bullshit)

It’s wayyyy too early in the trial for Yumeno to be the real culprit. It’s more likely she had handed the crossbow to Momota. Also everyone is overlooking Ouma’s clothes had a shot right on the back, if you survive that shit you’re gonna be paralised;   Eguisu Ouma hasn’t laughed “nishishi” even once. That’s a stupid reason but it’s what leads me to believe its not him hah.......

Also how far into the trial is someone gonna be like WELL The arrow hole just magically appeared into the video. You kids suck. YOU SUCK. Hinata was much smarter than you detective wtf. so much bullshit. If you PAUSE. YOU PAUSE. DONT NEED EDITING BITCHES?????

If they wanna shitpost to the extreme it’s gonna turn out both Momota AND Ouma are alive Lmao

Both the injuries with the arrows could be fabricated later. If Momota died of sickness that could be post mortem. 

I’m so tired of this switching bullshit just get it straight out omg

Wait, with Maki’s addition we still don’t know where the third arrow hit. First was on Ouma’s arm shot by Momota, second was her trying to kill him ???? And Momota jumped in front of it. Unless I’m confused. The cutscene didn’t have Ouma with the second shot on his back 

So I’m holding back on my bets

The Remote is such an unfair advantage. Couldn’t he have cheated on practically everything? Unloick the shit out of the entire school’s cardkey or not and so on

If they were going for maximum tearjerker, they’d have Ouma let Kaito die with her poison and her be executed. If they’re going for lawful good, they’d have Ouma kill Kaito and be executed. But these are too obvious. There’s also the possibility Kaito drank more poison himself so he’d die by his own hand, like Sakura

NOT THE CORPSE BULLSHIT AGAIN.

Oh man ok so Ouma was scheming for this goal? That’s way nuttier than Ko. Turn himself into a symbol for them all to hate to draw them into his goal. Then kidnap and get Momota away to force him to cooperate...........?

Idk how to feel. Purple boy was the ultimate twink (also he and Kato sharing some colors was probably intentional?)

I see what they’re aiming for, Momota to be the “true” counterpart of the “Lie” ouma, but it’s early to know how I feel about it.I’m glad Ouma wasn’t the Mastermind. He was truly a great, complex character. Not one of my favorites, but still very hard to like, and hard to read. 

:C So all of Momota’s similarities with Jin were for this paralel huh. It’s sad but it’s better than dying through the execution. He looked so peaceful. Also the first time someone frustrates the plan to the end.

Junko????? Again wow who’s surprised amirite. At this point I’m not gonna be surprised if they have clones of everyone statched away somewhere. That’s why they keep fretting on “having fun again” and “lives with real (unique) meaning)?”

OH NO KIBO NO Is he berserk? HE WAS TRANSMITTING TO NAEGI WASNT HE

NO.......... NO...................... LET THE ROBOT BE........... LEAVE THE ROBOT ALONE......... (he looks so cool BUT LEAVE HIM ALONE LET HIM LIVE)

Where is my Spoiler-chan??????? 

I keep thinking about Jabberwock Island. I keep thinking about them building a shelter.. If they get past the Meteors, Tsumiki can create vaccines. Souda can make air purifiers. Hajizuru can do pretty much fuckall. :C I want to see them live through armagedon >CCCCCCC 

[scoutshonor56]

Code Red

- A Few Good Men, Revisited -

 Well, as we all know by now, yet another book is coming out (official release date next Tues, 9/11) raising more shades at the White House as America gets a clearer view into the psych ward located at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave…or maybe that should be cannibal shark tank, with all the blood in the water…

This time it’s simply titled “Fear”, by award-winning investigative journalist at the Washington Post (where he is currently associate editor), Bob Woodward, author (or co-author) of 18 best-selling non-fiction novels.

Woodward bases his book on the interviews and recollections of high-level insiders, all with the caveat that none are identified by name. I’m still a little confused on this, as preview excepts have names attributed throughout – but that being said, let’s just say“allegedly”, during Woodward’s interview for the book with presidential legal advisor John Dowd, Dowd recounted how the idea was floated that they would stage a mock interview between the president and head investigator into the Russian collusion scandal, Robert Mueller.  You know, to give Donny Clueless a warm-up batting session before/if he were to actually testify, or possibly be interviewed, in collaboration with Mueller - which is laughable in itself.  At the beginning of 2018 the Liar in Chief was quoted repeatedly saying that he was actually “looking forward” to testifying under oath in cooperation with the Mueller probe, when we all knew Bozo would shave his head, take up yoga, and lose 40lbs before he would do any such thing.

Anyways, during the dry run, this orange-skinned clown and presidential imposter “allegedly” repeatedly lied and contradicted himself, insulted the former F.B.I. director, James Comey, then exploded in anger, ranting for a half-hour about the whole investigation being a hoax.  Later (again “allegedly”), Mr. Dowd tried to demonstrate why their meeting was reason for Mr. Trump not to do an interview with Mr. Mueller, citing the president’s schedule demands (wink, wink).

“I’m not going to sit there and let him look like an idiot,” Dowd said.  Later that month (“allegedly”), Mr. Dowd told Mr. Trump why he should avoid an interview: “It’s either that or an orange jumpsuit.”

 *Dowd, who served as the president’s personal attorney since last June and was the lead lawyer for the Russian investigation team resigned this past March, joining the ranks who received an “I WORKED FOR TRUMP AND QUIT!” T-shirt as a consolation prize on their way out the door.  The only other alternative in this administration is “I WORKED FOR TRUMP UNTIL I WAS TWEETED!”

My mind being an endless jukebox of random cultural references, it didn’t take me long to envision a different take of the famous courtroom exchange in the climactic scene from “A Few Good Men”, featuring Tom Cruise as Lt. Daniel Kaffee, prosecuting Col. Nathan Jessup, played by Jack Nicholson.  Let’s listen in – the actual dialogue from the movie is in italics, followed by Trump and Mueller as they give the heated scene a fresh, 2018 reboot:

Jessup: You want answers?

Kafee: I think I’m entitled to them.

Trump: You want answers?

Mueller: I think I’m entitled to them.

Jessup: You want answers?

Kafee: I want the truth.

Trump: You want answers?

Mueller: I want the truth.

Jessup: You can’t handle the truth!

Trump: I CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!  (gasping silence in the courtroom)

What…… oops, wait a minute, I think that came out wrong… (Giuliani seen covering his face with both hands at the defense table)  

Jessup: Son, we live in a world that has walls. And those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago and you curse the marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives.

Trump: Son, we live in a world that should have walls.  Big, beautiful walls!  And those walls are to keep all the foreign cockroaches on their side of the fence.  Who’s going to build these walls?  You?  I have a greater responsibility, to make sure Mexico builds and pays for my wall.  You weep for the children of criminals who have the luxury and privilege of living in American holding cages while their drug dealing, murdering parents are sent back to where they came from, and then curse our American immigration policy. Their interment and eviction saves lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, is, is…. Melania, I see you smirking!

Jessup: (continuing)…You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall. You want me there!  We use words like honor, code, loyalty...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline.

Trump: (continuing)… Truth isn’t truth, right Rudi?  Deep down you want that wall!  We use words like hugely, covfefe, loser, tremendous, hombres, rocket man, crooked, amazing, fake news, son-of-a-bitch, moron, cow, pig, witch hunt, disgusting, shit-hole, bing bing bong bong bing bing bing…

Judge: Mr. Trump, please answer the question.

Jessup: (continuing)… I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it. I'd prefer you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to.

Trump: (continuing)… I don’t have time to explain myself to a smarty pants lawyer! I’ve got Air Force One waiting to take me to my private club in Bedminster, New Jersey for a 1:00 tee off! I’d prefer you to just say “all charges dropped” and went on your way.  Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a golf club and hit the links!

Kafee: (quietly) Did you order the code red?

Jessup: I did the job you sent me to do.

Mueller: (quietly) Did you order the obstruction of the investigation into possible collusion with the Russians?

Trump: I did the job Vlad told me to do.

Kafee: Did you order the code red?

Jessup: (pause) You’re goddamn right I did!!

Mueller: Did you order the obstruction of the investigation into possible collusion with the Russians?

Trump: YOU’RE GODDAMB RIGHT I DID!! (Gasp heard throughout the courtroom, cut to Giuliani’s head falling to the table with an audible thump)

Ahhh, if only life were more like Hollywood – sigh…

Well, Dowd’s shared recollection was certainly no surprise or grand revelation to anyone; I mean let’s face it, Trump’s babbling testimony would sink his case in less than five minutes against a high school debate team member.  But don’t worry all you Trump fans, there’s already in the making Donny’s back-up plan, his “ace up the sleeve”: the appointment of a ringer to the highest court in the land, Brett Kavanaugh!

VP Pence: Here’s the short list and stack of resumes for the Supreme Court nominee you requested sir…

Trump: (briefly glancing at the 18” high stack of folders) Never mind Mike, I think we found our man!

VP Pence: But sir, that was just a tweet…

Trump: I don’t care Mike, I’ve got a gut feeling about this guy – I like the cut of his jib!  Give this Bart a call!

VP Pence: Brett…

Trump: Whatever!

Kavanaugh tweet: “I favor presidential immunity and pardons!”

[quonit-aceattorney]

2-2 Reaction

Rules:

Q = Me, Quonit.

BF = Bardic Feline, the friend that made me spend 30 dollars on the game and whom I am messaging

I don’t use those when I send the messages close enough my username doesn’t appear.

Any typos (unless they are funny and part of the conversation) will be fixed.

Index

—

Q: also I can't play more ace attorney because when I finished game 1 my brother wanted to play it so now I can't play more until he realizes in order to play through game two he'll have to delete my progress so he has to wait till im done with that

BF: Whaaat

There should be more than one save slot!

Q :We thought that too! That ended up with Alex thinking the second game thing was another save file for the first game

BF: Huh

Q: he brought me back DS I can play as work yaaaay

BF: Wooo!

Q: back to phoenix wright

Q: car ooo

who was drugged with sleeping pills

oh hello ghost dude

murdurer who's that black haired girl outside of the flaming car

ini?

i liked these new opening scenes they have a lot more art

oh no D: not Maya!

they don't even avoid the "it was a rainy day" cliche like

who this guy

Q: uhhh turner that wasn't very friendly

Q: "I AM UPSET"

this was a year ago??? what???

Q: I was working under Mia not Maya

Q: the timeline makes no sense

June??? June what year??? Is this set before the chapter I just played???

oh my god that kid doesn't look right what

(^and that was my first ever reaction to Pearl. I thought she looked like a long 3-year-old. a glimpse. Ridicule me.)

Q: In happy Maya is here at least

Q: “I wouldn't take a crazed killer as my client" Maya you just have to BELIEVE they're not a crazed killer

Q: I wanna get to the case with Juan i n it but for now I'll be happy that at the moment he is living

Q: May 2nd is my bros birthday

Q: This guy needs better glasses that won't fall down

Q: Anyone can be a saint when compared to lawyers

Q: Wonder if anyone is in the direction

SIDE ROOM

Q: OH MY GOD THAT IS A LOT OF CANDLES

Is that a mushroom afro or hat

Q: I work hard at blaming it on Maya she gave me hints on what to do next and stopped the verdict from being assigned/mean any thing

Q: I wonder why we can't tell anyone about Mia

Q: Who is calling me!!!

HI I REMEMBER YOU

How are you lotta!

Q :How would Lotta plan to take pictures

Q: DID SOMEBODY DIE IN THERE

Oh now the citizens !Alex sense

CUT-SCENE

I think we should break in but Morgan won't approve

Q: Why will anybody who possesses Maya not stop showing off their books

Q: Boobs

Q: Hi gumshoe

Q: Who are you you don't look like you're in the Fea family

Q: Hey look it's the kid again

I got the key!! Thanks Pearl!

Q: Hey I don't have the key

Q: Ugh I'm stuck

BF: hahahah always that point where you end up trying to figure out what to do next

Oh, apropos of nothing, but Ini's name is pronounced "Eenie"

and she had a sister (who you will find out about) named Mimi

BF: and their last name is pronounced Mine-ee

Therefore, they are Ini (Eenie) Mimi (Meenie) Miney!

and the next case features a guy named MOE

Q: alright!

Q: Talking with the kid YAY

Reasons why I dislike the kindle

If shipping me and Maya gets me that key then please continue

Ya I wanna help in Maya

Q :This because brings up the question of if Maya likes me because everyone in the village listens to get and seems to ship us... Though I bet it's just a misinterpretation on their end

BF: Only on Pearl’s end, really

Q: As suspected

She's cute though! I like Pearl :D

Hopefully the aunt won't come and get mad at me

Q: Sorry to disappoint you pearl but I went to lawyer school not channeling school

BF: Pearl is such a cutie

Q: She is! I feel bad about the first thing I said about her is that she looks weird

Yesss finally I have the key

BF: Oh there’s going to be multiple things about Pearl’s reading skills, and before you judge her as a total idiot, remember that in the original Japanese, it’s Kanji she’s struggling with haha

Q: Alright!

Pearl what if I phrase it like this: MYSTIC MAYA told me to give this to you

Q: Okay pearl you can follow me as long as you know your mom won't put my head on a pike soon after

Q: How would gumshoe NOT like kids

Q: How about we explain to Gummy about how she was possessed

I do indeed have a copy

Q: 

Gumshoe: The prosecutor is going to be Von Karma

WAIT WASN'T VAMPIRE ARRESTED

NO

I SWEAR IF I ACTUALLY HAVE TO FIGHT THAT ASS AGAIN

Q: Oh thank God he didn't actually get out prison or something

Q: First time we see edgy in the game I wonder how he is doing

Q: PHOENIX somebody is actually interested in your badge and you don't show it to them???

How could you!!!

Q: IT'S NOT A HOUSE KEY, IT'S A BICYCLE KEY!

Q: It's that weird redheaded girl I don't like again

Q: The frick am I hallucinating?

Q: Oh hey she's lying!!! Thank you pearl

Q: Uh I don't know if I should try or not

Oh ya still stuck with this girl

Wait what

I looked at the second newspaper clipping and it says she died what

Q: Sharing a last name okay

Yay I win

Q: Ini if that is what happened why do you still look so happy

Q: :goes to court: I KNOW YOU ARE LYING BECAUSE OF THIS MAGIC ROCK AN 8 YEAR OLD HAVE ME

Q: Pearl let me take you away from your home without a parents consent I have some candy with me

Hi mia!!!

Q: So I know she can't tell me much because the game wouldn't be fun but what is the in universe explanation

Mia how dare you lie to me I thought we were friends

Save point

Q: Pearly hi how did you leave without your mom noticing

strong pearly

Edgy is my objection buddy

Wait he actually quit D:

I am ready to hate this person just as much as I did the first vampire

Q: No I am not shocked you are a woman now I'm just wondering why we have not met up with another female prosecutor

Q: HEY DON'T HIT THE JUDGE

Q: I don't think she should be allowed to bring that anymore

Then how did manfred fail if you are all so perfect

Fool

Q :HEY SHE HIT GUMMY D:

Q: Ya but we heard two gunshots and you say there was just one

Q: Hey there is a bullet hole in it

Q: I can figure it out I know I can

Q: I would use the gun on the last statement because it was fired twice and has the victims fingerprints on it but that didn't work

Q: Why can't I find anything

Q: I am stuck :(

BF: Aaaah I'd help but I don't know which part of the cross exam your at so I don't know what you're trying to prove right now

Q: I'll type the thing why not

Q: "Sorry pal there is more evidence", "this is the costume masthead wearing", "it's covered is blood," " defendant killed the person who did not right back ".

BF: ....I'm not sure, but I THINK you can find some evidence to disprove the 'didn't fight back' thing by gesturing to the sleeve of her costume somehow

If I'm remembering that segment correctly.

Q: Back

Hey the costume did work thank you

Q: Somebody please take that whip away from her

BF: hhaha no problem

the whip is Franzy's signature item, though. lD

BF: Also, she's not the last prosecutor who will physically assault you during a trial and get away with it hahah

Q: How dare this game

But there is a bullet hole in the outfit he didn't miss

Q: Finally that other bullet hole contradicts something

Q: I'm not getting something it's why I keep saving

I should know at this point where Maya was

BF: If you are still on the first day of the trial, you actually don’t have enough info yet to know where in the room she was!

Q: Dangit

Q: Oh hey I do know what I am doing

Q: I'm sorry what kinda swear is that Phoenix

Q: Lotta please don't be annoying like last  time you were here

Oooo save point

Hi pearl I forgot about you

Q: See I'm not the only one annoyed by the whip!!!

How am I supposed to be happy when a Von Karma is around

How am I supposed to pretend we are all family

Q: Lotta there were two gunshots

Q: For now I don't think I can present any evidence

Q: Which is sad

Q: WHY DID YOU POSSES PEARL

at least your not showing off Boobs

Nevermind

Q: Von Karma I hate you

Q: FINALLY I can prove it wasn't Maya

Q: No morons that is Mia

Q: You know if was ready to hate this second vampire but she isn't nearly as bad as the first one so far

Q: I'm not a fool I'm just annoying

BF: Franziska really isn’t the straight up villain her dad was; she’s more like a more prickly Edgeworth

Q: Alright well that is better

I really wanna see pearl tell at her haha

Q: Ya edgy was fine after a while but being nice forced him to leave him job so

Q: Who is misty who are you trying to kill

Q: Not a movie but it is a game and anime so

Q: How did steel samurai merch get in here

Q: Aww a cute theme for pearl

Q: Don't worry pearl I won't tell your mom

Q: Hey Lotta if you don't want me to be chasing you then maybe you should stop being in the rooms I need to go to

Q: and that is why Phoenix doesn't date women Lotta.

Q: Lotta you're fine you're one of the more likable people in this game

Q: I dislike that girl so I'd be fine to say she's the killerI  mean it'd make sense

She is the sister of girl who was killed by the man who just died

BF: Indeed, she does have a motive!

Q :back to thing

Comic is going it is fun to draw

Q: yes please give me info

new place to go. Also why does Lotta not like giving me info

what is this place

Q: you don't look like a doctor

Q: well of course you aren't

BF: Hahaha oh man I forgot you hadn’t encountered that creep yet

back to ace attourny but this is a great AU

Q: phoenix started talking like the guy hahaha

oh no did Pearl's mom call the cops on me

crap

Q: Ya well I suspected she was as evil

Q :need to go again dangit

Q: I think it's funny how I'm the scary one in this game

Q: I think right now I don't know if like the redhead girl or Morgan more

Q: the more I find out i guess i like the redhead more

Q: I win >:D

if we were both asleep then maybe you were both drugged like how the opening said

what is she talking about

im scared

Q: how about you show her your damn police badge that'd be interesting to her

pearl come with meeee

Q: mia don't lie to me i have a magic rock

Q: one more lock.

I feel smart :D

oh so morgan and ini were the killers great

Q: well if she made it look like Maya killed him she could become the next master

Q :Pearl did you run here AGAIN???

oh god please don't bring morgan

pfft Maya she does this to you too?

Ohhh well I guess that makes sense... I mean, she would be really mad at me for saying her mom killed the guy

Q: I like Mia and (whats her name the second vampire) arguing it's funny

Q: morgan you are lying

Q: ya no you hated me there is no way you thought "good sir"

BF: haha Franziska!

Q: I'll call her Franz for short

I mean this testimony was in the opening so maybe it isn't entirely a lie

Q: what do you mean it wasn't strange???

Q: but there was blood on her outfit how did you not think it was strange!!!

Q: mini stop eating your hat

that personality change reminds me of the worst person ever ... April May

Q: no but really it isn't more subjective

Q: Pearl is being used as evidence why not

Q: Franz stop it let me question her

i wanna present the urn but morgan is watching

but you know what there is nothing else here so

Q:

Franz: Why do I feel like you’re going to ruin my beautiful day? Me: CUZ I AAAAAMMMM

also why is Ini's hat so stretchy

BUT IT WAS A LIE

JUST BECAUSE SHE TESTIFIED ABOUT IT DOESN'T MEAN SHE CAN'T AGAIN

LIES AND SLANDER

Q :IT'S NOT BASELESS ALSO YOUR DAD IS A PIECE OF SHIT

Q: CRIME SCENE

SCENE OF THE CRIME HMMMM

Q: I am angry i will use caps

Q :YOU WERE HIDING THE PLACE PHOENIX ALWAYS THINKS SOMEBODY IS HIDING BUT WILL NEVER CHECK NO MATTER WHAT I DO

wow there are a lot of holes in your hat when you strech it out

spinny hat

then how did lotta earlier isn't she bigger than you

when i first went into the room the box wasn't there and then later it was

BUG ON MY DESK KILL IT

KILL IT NOW

i think it's dead

i hope so

Q :the folding screen >:3

SHUT UP FRANZ

ugh that bug is making me left arm flinch a lot

revenge after your death how dare you

Q :im not foolish im just better than you

BETTER THAN YOUR ASSHOLE OF A FATHER

I COULD RAISE YOU

wait what did i just say wtf hahaha

Q: and that is why i think that MORGAN HELPED

Q: WAIT I WANNA LOOK AT THAT FRAME BY FRAME

Q: yesss good case

well I mean your dad did

also fuck your dad I hate him that is all

BF: hahahaha

Q: actually no im not done

but finishing it would include a lot of swear words

BF: This case is totally setting up for some things in Game 3, btw

Q: dammit

Well I have motives for both of them Franz I just need to know that Phoenix knows.

BF: what you are ultimately trying to prove is Ini's motive, then that she did it and how she did it with Morgan's help

Q: okay!

Q: I am much more confidence than phoenix but that may just be anger

and a save point

OH GREAT NOW WE HAVE TO TALK TO FRANZ OUT OF THE COURT GREEAAAT

Actually Maya I had everything to do with it and I am proud I gave his ass the death penalty

stop being mean to Maya you're dad already cost Edgy his job hey now I have another reason to hate vampire

back to cort

Q: I'm sad because you said there is a universally hated case in the second game and I figured there are only 4 and the first two aren't it and neither is the fourth so it has to be the third but then I realized that Edgy is on the cover of the game so he should be in at least half of it so he might reappear in the worse one and I am sad

back to game

Q: LIAR YOU DID HAVE YOUR LICENSE THAT IS HOW THEY RECONSTRUCTED YOUR FACE

Q: “newb”

now this sounds like 2016

Q: how do you NOT know what the UK is you s***ty excuse for a judge

I'm so mad i started being mean to the judge I should direct it to Franz for being a jerk

BF: hahaha don't worry so much about that. I'm not going to say how it plays out, but I think you'll be pleased.

Q: yessss

BF: and the third case is the one that people generally don't like: I personally think it's interesting, but it DOES have some issues.

Q: dangit

well hopefully I can like it

BF: I'm going to let you make up your own mind on it, yeah.

Q: aaalllirght

BF: I'll tell you afterwards what I actually LIKE about it, okay?

Q: alright!

Q: WAIT SO

MINI IS PRETENDING TO BE HER SISTER HUH...

Q: aw hi mimi

Q: Fanz let me explain this to you: The Von Karma family is full of assholes you all deserve to die before they cause as much suffering as your father did

ya I'm going to call the cops on your for physical assult

are we allowed to tell Maya that Mia has been possesing her a lot

Q: game you know what the date and time is  if you just don't want me to know tell me

So the games are just becoming more and more about magic huh

the end of the chapter this doesn't feel finished