#plague. suddenly becomes most stressful meeting of his life <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[nonuggetshere]

I NEED to update my Radiance's gijinka design I stg I have such cool art ideas for her and PK but I am. So lazy.

Two sides of the same coin, equally as awful morally grey people that would maul each other to death if put in the same room, I love them 💜

I need to also focus more on her role in my AU because while I've rewritten pretty much the entire thing she was left behind and now idk what to do with her in the long run oopsie. All ik is that she ends up being mortal or near mortal after her fight with Ghost and Flower and she is Not happy about it, but it's also the only way PK would have left her alive and Flower is big on second chances so now she's just here, bitter and angry and a shadow of her former self (and actually I just didn't have it in me to kill her before I could do something cool with her + I like the potential dynamic she could have with other characters)

[whosscruffylooking]

The Purest Things- Repeating History

Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Brief mentions of murder and alcohol. Canon typical violence.

A/N: this takes place during season 3 episode 11, birthright. i had a lot of fun studying this episode and making it my own. i have changed certain dialogue and who says what for the sake of the story. please enjoy!

The Purest Things Masterlist

(my gif! please credit if you use.)

january 2008

Syd Moore said, “Disregard for the past will never do us any good. Without it we cannot know truly who we are.”

+++++

Your alarm is often hushed before it even has an opportunity to set off nowadays because you usually wake up before it even has the chance.

4:25 A.M.

You groan and toss your pillow over your face. Maybe, just maybe, you can will yourself to sleep for a little longer. As if someone heard your pleas for slumber, your phone starts buzzing on your bedside table. Of course, it is unnecessary for you even to read the messages. There is a case.

+++++

"Last night in Fredericksburg, a 20-year-old woman, Molly McCarthy, was abducted," J.J. begins, "She's the third to go missing in the last 6 weeks. All disappeared from public places. No one's seen them since until now. A couple days ago, body parts with cigarette burns were recovered from a national park that was once the site of the battle of Chancellorsville."

"Were they able to make an I.D.?" you and Hotch ask simultaneously. Your eyes meet, but he breaks the contact abruptly. Flustered and insecure, you bury your focus deep into the file in front of you. The group discusses the case for a couple of minutes, but you are so concentrated on the papers that you hardly absorb any information they've shared.

There is something familiar about this case to you. Suddenly, realization strikes.

Rejoining the discussions, you say, "I remember reading about a case like this in Spotsylvania county. Similar markings on the bone. It was the winter of 1980, also in Fredericksburg. There were 5 women aged 16 to 24. They were buried in pieces."

"Same markings. Same civil war battlefield," J.J. responds in agreement.

The team agrees that this could be the works of the same killer. There are aspects of the more recent killings that would be impossible to copycat since those details had never been released to the public. But, if this is the same unsub, what's he been doing for the past 27 years?

+++++

Hotch focuses on the road while you watch out the window of the passenger seat. Occasionally, you sneak the odd peek at him. His stoicism is alluring, and you find yourself drawn to this demeanor like a moth to a flame. Piecing together the tiny glimpses you've collected thus far as if working on a mental puzzle, you scrutinize his attributes. His eyes bare the beginnings of crow's feet. Only his sideburns tease the speckling of salt and pepper undertones. His lips turn downwards at the corners, no doubt from years of scowling at unsubs.

Reid speaks up from behind you both and breaks your train of thought. Probably for the better, there's no reason why you should examine your unit chief so intently.

"It's funny--he always dumps the bodies in this battlefield, no matter what the risk."

"It's a respected landmark. He's flaunting," Aaron reckons.

"It makes him feel important," you say in agreement.  

Once you have arrived at the crime scene, you follow Agent Hotchner closely. Reid trails ahead, most likely trying to keep up with his own train of thought.

"How does someone not see or hear them?" You ask the sheriff.

He turns to you with a defeated expression, "It was dark. He had the advantage. Molly's boyfriend was the last person to see her. He said she was alone for a minute, maybe less."

Hotch surveys the surroundings, "He's patient and works fast."

"He's perfected his M.O.," Reid states while looking around.

You cross your arms as a wave of unease gets the best of you as you envision the moments leading to Molly's attack.

"If our unsub's pushing 60, he's gotta be strong enough to carry her a long way without her struggling," you bring out.

Hotch looks to you with a concerned squint. You shake your head, signaling to him that it's nothing you can't get under control. He nods in response. The sheriff agrees to point out the various entrances to the park.

"I'll catch up with you," your Unit Chief states. He motions for you to step aside with him, and you comply.

"You know, ever since my wife and I had our son, I dread receiving cases involving children," he discloses to you.

Tears well up in your eyes, "I can't even imagine, but sir, why are you telling me this?"

"This job will inevitably strike close to home on some cases more than others. It's okay for you to feel overwhelmed by it all every once and a while," he assures you.

"You never lose it, though."

He sighs heavily, "Maybe I should have."

Shortly before you joined the BAU, Hotch's wife Haley left with their son Jack. You never ask questions or stick your nose where it doesn't belong. It isn't your place, and you can't blame him for not wanting to bring his family struggles to work. He deals with enough broken families on the job as it is. Mixing his own personal life into the field would only make it more challenging to prioritize. Despite all this, you cannot help but wonder what exactly led to his and his wife's separation. You hope that they can find their way back to each other. The crimes you investigate do not need to claim the Hotchner's as victims as well.

+++++

"I'll let you talk to Chrissy Wilkenson," Hotch directs you towards the kitchen. You wipe your sweaty palms against the fabric of your pants and make your way into the kitchen, Hotch following closely behind you.

"Mrs. Wilkenson," you say gently, "My name is Y/F/N. I have just a few questions about your husband. Where does Charlie usually go when he's stressed?"

"The barn," she stutters. You can tell she's anxious and afraid for the well-being of her family.

"Anywhere else, Chrissy?"

Hotch is called into the other room, and you continue questioning Chrissy. She's becoming overwhelmed, so you guide her to the dining room.

"I know this is difficult, Chrissy."

"Did the father of my child really do that to those poor women?" She cradles her baby bump.

Your heart breaks for her, and you choose to remain silent. Sometimes saying nothing speaks louder than words.

Footsteps bound throughout the house, and Hotch appears in the doorway, "The sheriff will stay here with Mrs. Wilkenson. We need you with us."

Standing up from your chair, you place your hand atop Chrissy's, "History doesn't have to repeat itself." It is almost as if she could tell you were reading her thoughts. The endless whispers that cloud her mind making her feel like she's left with only one choice, but there's always another option. That is all you are trying to remind her of.

+++++

As you and your team trek through the forest, you see a clearing.

"Hotch, this way," you beckon him to pursue your course.

Suddenly, a gunshot rings out, and you stop in your tracks. You make eye contact with Hotch and mirror each other's actions, dashing towards the opening in the trees. Your heart pounds in rhythm with your footsteps colliding against the ground. It is clear to you from your exchange with Chrissy at the house that the origin of the gunshot will shock everyone but yourself. As you reach the clearing and rush down the hill, your speculation is validated.

Chrissy Wilkenson is standing over the body of her husband, the unsub. A traumatized young man haunted by his father's past and plagued by the idea that children are trapped in the endless cycles created by their parents.

I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Jesus. Now is not the time for that.

The newly widowed woman claims self-defense, yet the cops handcuff her anyways. Inside, you feel conflicted while watching her get into the back of the squad car.

Hotch appears by your side but remains silent. Again, sometimes silence speaks louder than words. You bit your lip, attempting to hide the fact that it is trembling.

"What did you say to her as you were leaving the dining room?"

"I told her that history does not have to repeat itself. I wanted her to know that even when it feels like you are backed into a corner, there is always another way out. Sometimes people don't know where to look for their out thought," you quiver.

He lightly touches your arm and gives you a reassuring tilt of the head, "Just know that you did everything you could. We will never do this job perfectly. Doing the right thing usually costs more than it pays. You did your part.  I'm not a saint, and I am far from a hero, but I have integrity and honor, and I do this job to the best of my ability."

"If you can leave a case with a clear conscience," he continues, "you know you did the best you could. Any other thought process will eat away at you slowly but surely, and ultimately, it will result in the demise of your career and destruction of yourself."

+++++

After a seemingly neverending day, you all arrive back at Quantico.

"I could really go for a drink, guys. What do you say? Newbie's buying," you wave your wallet around frivolously.

"I could go for 5 drinks!" Prentiss exclaims.

"Count me in," Morgan winks at you. He never fails to make you blush.

Reid hesitates and you pout your bottom lip, "Please Reid! How could you not want a repeat of Dolly Parton night last month?"

Hotch comes down the stairs, "Dolly Parton night? Do I want to know?"

You and Derek snicker to each other as Spencer attempts to diffuse his own embarassment.

"9 to 5 is an iconic female anthem that certainly has a rather bewitching affect on a man when mixed with alcohol."

"You only drank Diet Coke that night," you roll your eyes at him.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Hotch forcing his way through the small group formed around the desks.

Making your way over to him, you invite him to join, "Want a beer?" You second guess yourself, but it seems as though his rather stern expression softens ever so slightly when he pivots on his heels to look at you.

"I would like that," he answers softly.

He immediately returns to his original path and hovers near the glass doors. You casually make your way over to him, joined by Dave and Emily. A man barges in through the glass doors announcing Aaron's name.

"Agent Hotchner?"

"Yes," the subject in question breaths out almost defeatedly.  

The yellow package he holds in his hands is all too familiar and instantly churns your stomach into knots. You gnaw at your bottom lip, drawing a metallic taste that causes you to cringe.

"What is it?" Emily speaks up.

There's no question as to what it is. Oh Hotch. I’m so sorry.

Hotch's eyes trace the package from corner to corner in disbelief, "Haley's filing for divorce. I've been served."

When he eventually takes his eyes off of the lettering, his eyes meet yours. They lock onto you and it is in that moment that you feel as though you have been given the key to unlock his soul. His eyes are so unusual at this moment; they are more vulnerable than you have ever seen. The stoic man is gone, and instead, it is the eyes of one who is in tremendous pain. You had mistaken his bloodshot eyes for physical fatigue on the plane, but now you see that it is emotional exhaustion as well.

If only you knew how badly I want to hug you and tell you that you won't be swallowed up by this darkness. There's a long road ahead, but you have so many people here who love you and are here to support you through this. You aren't alone. Trust me, I know.

In some way, you pray that he can read into your soul and see the pain you feel for him. Once more, your shared silence proves to speak for itself.  

At last, he breaks eye contact with you and finally releases the breath that you had been holding in. Dave grabs onto your arm, seeing the clear impact Hotch's news has on you, no doubt having also noticed Hotch's immediate response in looking at you.

"I'm sorry, but I don't think I can join you tonight," he excuses himself and escapes to the seclusion of his office.

Maybe history does have a way of repeating itself.

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[accio-victuuri]

Hi can you provide the link to read manhuas you prefer?

Hello Anon! OMG Manhua/Manhwa Rec! Here we go! I’ve only been reading for 2-3 months (consistently), so this will be pretty limited. I will link to the legit sites. A google search will direct you to others.

Most of these are WIPs and some, sadly, are discontinued. I won’t add TGCF or MDZS here cause those are already a given. 👇🏼

• Body Electric by Dong Ye ( completed, supernatural, lots of trigger warnings and plotty )

Ba Song is the hotshot cop who’s been handed an open-and-shut case: the suicide of a young woman. Except… who commits suicide by stabbing their own body and strangling themself? There's only one man who can help him with this mystery — Bo Shan, the renowned forensic pathologist with a severe and cold personality. What's more, his body produces bioelectricity, allowing him to acutely sense bodily injury with his touch. There's an electric current between them, and each touch sizzles with energy

If you like crime dramas and stories where they solve mysterious cases then this is for you. The romance is subtle, and their relationship is not insta-love. strangers to colleagues to friends to lovers trope. This also discusses alot of issues the society has that will make you stop and think. Ba Song is really the honorable MC in here who always wants to help people and do good. While Bo Shan is the reluctant one but deep inside, he wants to make a difference too. I wish they would make a donghua or live action out of this.

• 30 year old by S-Monkey - ( ongoing, age difference, blind dates, slice of life)

Charlie Wei is a single and handsome executive. He’s also a closeted gay guy who’s been on way too many bad blind dates with women. Charlie’s still hung up on his ex-boyfriend James and is… gasp, 30! Charlie’s family thinks he’s straight and too old to be without a wife! During another bad blind date, Charlie meets the flirty Ethan, who both annoys and intrigues him. Can Charlie finally come out and find true love with Ethan or will he continue on his streak of bad blind dates?

The cover looks melodramatic but it’s really not. This is so funny! I read this because people were saying it reminded them of BoXiao. And yes, there are moments here that remind me of them, but it’s more like an AU of BoXiao. I stayed up late trying to get caught up in the chapters and you won’t realize it cause it’s just that good. I love seeing the older MC loosening up and being more of himself. and the younger one being more responsible in his career. They just become better versions of themselves because of each other. It’s so sweet!

• I ship me and my Rival - by Pepa ( ongoing, comedy, reads like a meta )

This follows the adventures of Wei Yanzi, a third-rate actor in the Chinese entertainment industry, stumbles onto a shipping fandom for himself and another actor (Gu Yiliang) while trying to escape from the flame wars and negativity. He's so taken with this group of fans who actually see him as a good guy instead of an enemy/rival of Gu Yiliang that he falls head-first into fandom and becomes actively involved in trying to provide shipping fuel and the fans' daily dose of fluff.

IF THERE IS ONE thing you will read here, let it be this. It is hilarious. If you are a CP fan you will relate so much and it’s a good time. It just shows how people who think are rivals can actually be really good friends in real life. What we see is not always what it seems. and people will interpret things based on their bias. The MC here is so dramatic! how his inner feelings/reactions were drawn will make you laugh.

• Path to You - by Sinran (completed, slice of life, age gap fluff and comedy )

When almost college dropout Jensen attempts to drink away his problems, unemployed Nathaniel suddenly pukes on him and ruins his night. As an apology, Nathaniel offers to help Jensen with his studies. Despite Jensen's difficulties in getting along with people, the two become friends and something deeper begins to grow between them

The story is so soft. If you want something with mild angst/misunderstandings— then pick this. I love the progression of their relationship and how they take care of each other. There are other themes showed here other than the romance.

• Red Candy - by Hanse (completed season one with a cliffhanger, explicit scenes, assassins )

Shihyeon, aka “Red Candy,” is a secret agent whose code name comes from bathing in the blood of his marks on dangerous missions. Shihyeon’s tasked with seducing and obtaining intel from Hajun, a hot college professor. Shihyeon can disarm enemies, but didn’t expect to be disarmed himself by Hajun’s own tight body. Now Shihyeon’s caught between loyalty to his spy agency and Hajun. Can Red Candy survive the incoming wave of enemies and still indulge in the sweet ecstasy of Hajun’s embrace?

THIS STRESSED ME OUT MAAAN. Wow. I loved this. That season one cliffhanger. It’s definitely up there as my favorite. If you think about it, the tropes are really not original. An assassin is sent to shadow a person and they develop a relationship. That simple. But NOOOOO! There are so many things going on. The Main mystery plot, Their relationship, their shared past plus you have other sketchy secondary characters. And did i mention explicit scenes? Lots of them. I want this two to have a happy ending!!!

• Lone Swan - by Chu Man (discontinued, cultivation, star crossed lovers)

After losing his memory, Yiqiu Shen, a disciple from the decent sect meets a very special man named Luofeng Yan, who is the leader of the evil Divine Wind Cult. When escaping and conflicting with Yan, Shen gradually finds his original self as well as his previous love back. Together they rip off the facade of the martial world and reveal the hidden true

I didn’t want to add a discontinued story here, with no novel as a source material but this one made an impact on me. so. yeah. THE ART. breathtaking. The plot = layered. There are times I don’t even know who is telling the truth. It had so much potential and i hope it will get picked up again at some point. People rec this to those who enjoyed TGCF and MDZS, and they are right. 👍🏼

• Dragon in Distress by Si Wang Wen Hua - ( ongoing, dragons, past life, lost power, fantasy )

This is a story about a little Eastern green dragon and a little Western black dragon playing together.

The synopsis is pretty simple if you look at it but this one is pretty interesting. and surprisingly funny. tinie AoAo is so cute! 🤍 the other MC has tsundere tendencies tho. Lots of lore and more truths to uncover as the story progresses. I’m not giving it enough justice with how i’m reccing it, but if you like dragons and fantasy — give this a go.

• Breaking through the clouds 2: Swallow the Sea - Huaishang (ongoing, based on a novel, crime, drama, cases)

Wu Yu, a newcomer of the Public Security Bureau, is gentle and frail. He doesn’t care about the difficulties posed by Bu ZhongHua, his strict boss, and only wants to stay in the background to be paid on time with enough for food. However, no one knows that this young man’s head is targeted by top drug traffickers for a large bounty or that this courageous young man has once slaughtered the dragon of the abyss. With a chain of interlocking cases, a series of troubles come one after another. Can the two people work together to survive through the difficulties?

Do you see a pattern with me? lol. I like crime themes. This one is the same and by the looks of it, the cases they solve will take longer to unravel. I haven’t read the novel it’s based on yet so i’m just going with how the manhua is progressing. I like it when Wu Yu turns full on action-mode and when ZH takes care of him. Plus it helps that they are both gorgeous. I’ll get back this with a proper link.

• Where the Wind Stays - by Yusa (completed season one, curses, demons, possession, timeskip, explicit scenes)

To break an ancient curse that plagues the royal bloodline, young Prince Tasara is destined to be sacrificed in death. Nara is enlisted as a palace servant to carry out the prince’s execution when the time comes. But he develops a soft spot for the cursed prince, and after committing an atrocious and unforgivable act against Tasara, Nara is desperate to right his wrongs. Soon, their lascivious relationship that had been kept under wraps tests his resolve. Will Nara be tempted away from his original mission? There’s no telling how far he would go to earn Tasara’s forgiveness.

This story broke my brain, in a good way. I don’t wanna say much cause it will spoil the story. It’s the type that you gave to see and suffer through yourself. I am excited for what happens in season II!!!

Honorable Mentions:

I’m placing these here cause I have only read a few chapters and tho I liked them, I wanna read more before reccing it in full. 👍🏼

• I accidentally saved the Jinghu’s enemy

• Global Examination

• Monster entertainment

• Demon Apartment

And that’s it! Hope enjoy Anon! 😊

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 127

Annnnd a-one, and a-two, and a queue-queue-queue!

This chapter has one of my favorite things in the world to write - Interpersonal relationships (if you are surprised, I’m going to assume you are new here....).

Specifically, one of my biggest pet-peeves is when friends or siblings are written in a way that shows that the author doesn’t actually have any friends or siblings they are close enough to that all rules of societal politeness go whizzing into some far-off dimension as soon as they are in proximity.

When I get to write a chapter with such close friends/ersatz-siblings and also have @baelpenrose cackling and egging me on, it literally makes my whole day.

P.S: If anyone has wondered about the ages of the characters, several are clearly lined out in this chapter......

EDIT: Fixed some insane formatting issues.

“The food festival, Sophia? Really?” an incredulous voice asked before the door to my office even opened all the way.

I resisted the urge to scream, but did surrender to pinching the bridge of my nose and breathing slowly. “Hello, Arthur. Do come in. Long time no see.  Of course I’m not busy…” My one day each week to have a few hours to myself - no mentees, no assistant, even Tyche was off work….

“We saw each other last night when I came over for dinner after sparring with Conor, and  you’re never busy on Saturdays, Alistair makes sure of it.” He dragged a chair in front of my desk for what I felt was the sole purpose of putting his boots on my desk instead of the conference table.

“I thought you two didn’t even like each other, how did you - “

He waved a hand dismissively. “Enemy of my best friend’s enemy is my friend, that sort of thing. Anyway - “

“Did you just call me my own worst - “

“You are, let’s not pretend otherwise. Anyway.” Arthur arched an eyebrow at me and waited for any further objections, but I couldn’t think of any. “The Food Festival. It’s my one favorite tradition on this ship until armed combat becomes a spectator sport, and you are putting Parvati and Hannah in charge of it?”

After a beat pause to make sure he was done, I glared at him. “Everyone has asked me that, and I don’t understand the issue.  They’ve both helped in the past, even before they started training to replace me.  I’ve handed more and more off to them each time, and they did great! Plus, they have three months, it will be fi - Wait, why do you even care, Arthur?”

He held up one finger with the authority of a deity who would have smited me if he could. “One, Parvati Fletcher does not like mapo tofu. You do. Specifically, you like it from that one vendor who grows her own Sichuan peppercorns and uses them like they are an infinite resource. Two, I spend entirely too much time working with Zach Khan, and he won’t shut up about how stressed Hannah is. Three - “ I was seriously starting to get concerned he actually could smite me at this point - “As much as I love you in the most platonic way possible, you are an obsessive, compulsive perfectionist who insists on doing everything herself and running herself into the ground so that everyone else has the time of their lives. So why are you trusting this, the largest and oldest event on the Ark, entirely to other people?” Dropping his boots from the desk, he leaned forward, palms down until we were nearly nose to nose.

“Sophia Reid, I swear on any god I can kill if you are dying…”

“WHAT!?” I squawked, jerking back and standing so fast I knocked my chair over. “For the love of little fish, I’m not dying! I haven’t had a near death experience in four years, thank you.”

“Three, not counting the fact that there is a reason Alistair makes you drink anything through a straw anymore.”

“How did - Nevermind.” I shook my head and tried to focus on the topic at hand. “No, I’m not dying. Nor am I injured, having a midlife crisis, rethinking my life choices any more than I ever do, or so much as in possession of a stuffy nose.” Taking a deep breath, I rolled my eyes and started counting off before I could stop myself. “Conor and Maverick and I are fine. No, I’m not arguing with Tyche again. Yes, I’m still going to therapy. Else is fine. No new sentient plagues or rogue cult leaders that I’m aware of. Nor have I become immortal, queen of the universe, savior of humanity, pregnant by Noah, or possessed.” Carefully, I picked my chair back up and sat down.

“Good...to… know?” He gave me a funny look. “Who asked the most disturbing one?”

“Immortal or Savior of Humanity?” I asked for clarification. “Those were Maverick and Derek, respectively.”

The look only got worse. “I meant ‘pregnant by Noah’, but fascinating to see where your priorities lie….?”

“Oh. That was Charly.”

“Dammit,” he swore softly. “I had her pegged for ‘possessed’.”

“I’m pretty sure she is, but the suggestion that I am came from Tyche, on no fewer than 3 occasions, by 4 different entities. She seemed pretty hopeful that Else was potentially mind-controlling me in an effort to make me take a nap,” I admitted.

“That tracks.” A nod of approval prefaced the question I had been avoiding - successfully, thus far, I might add. “Now that you’ve ruled out every possible plausible reason that you would entrust this to literally anyone other than a clone of yourself, why?”

“Why what?” My face was composed in an expression of innocence so convincing that I probably deserved an Oscar.

“I can and will convince Charly to turn all your coffee to decaf, so help me, Sophia.”

Realizing that he was, legitimately, worried about me and at the limits of his usually-impressive patience, I held up my hands in surrender. “Fine. You get the scoop.  Please record this and send me the loop, so I can just flick it at people who ask, please?” When he nodded, I exhaled slowly.  “It is no secret to anyone that I never wanted this job. I made the mistake of establishing the Food Festival, which as you point out is the largest event of the cycle on the Ark - the last three years, literally everyone attended in some capacity.” When he opened his mouth to argue, I held up a hand to stop him. “Don’t get me wrong. I love the Festival. What basically started out as a potluck because we were homesick and needed to meet - you know, the rest of humanity - is a huge, three day holiday.  It’s amazing!” I spun in my chair, arms flung wide for emphasis, before stopping to face him. 

“It also consumes my life, for months, to prepare for.  And that’s just implementing changes to make it more accessible so people don’t miss out! That doesn’t include adding things to make it more interesting or keep it from getting boring, or whatever. I literally don’t have time to do any of that!”

“So, you’re inflicting this on them instead?”

“Inflicting?” I snorted.  “Hardly. This is their final exam, their capstone project, their dissertation.  If they pull this off, I will gladly hand the entire office over to whoever is elected, cheerfully and knowing the Ark is in good hands.  But, they have to pull this off.  It’s the only major part of being Councilor of Resources and Relations that they haven’t done yet by themselves.”

He rubbed his face, looking somewhat impressed. “That’s honestly not what I was expecting.”

“I don’t think it ever is, honestly.” I shrugged at the question he glanced towards me. “For Evan, it was coordinating the weapons exhibitions.  Charly managed to pre-empt her own by designing more efficient aqueducts and filtration for when we reach Von - you know, the ones that also produce light?”

“Of course she would invent glow-in-the-dark plumbing. Who else?” Something caught up with him. “Evania Josue got away with planning an event? Seriously?”

“Oh, that’s right… you weren’t on Level One…” I murmured. When he only looked more confused, I clarified. “She was Maverick’s co-pilot when we needed people to pilot the Ark, which was not designed to pilot manually, via dead reckoning, using cameras pointed out the few viewports we have, for several weeks after the sensors were sabotaged.”

“She was whose co-pilot?”

“You really never heard this story? You practically live with seven people who were there…”

“Usually I get the bits about ‘Sophia nearly got her brains bashed out’ and ‘that traitorous bitch’, then start tuning out while I try to decide what it would take to get Charly to teach me necromancy… If Evan was the co-pilot, then why is Maverick….”

“Not in line to replace any Councilors? Arthur, we know that would be a disaster for him.”

He nodded reluctantly. “Your younger partner is a nice boy.”

“For fuck’s sake, he’s thirty seven!” I groaned.

“Nice man, whatever,” he waved off. “Which is exactly what I would like for you as a partner. You need nice partners, and blunt siblings. But I see what you mean about him being a Councilor… he’d be miserable.”

“What was yours?” I asked mischievously, dropping my chin onto my hands.

That earned me a flat stare, until he finally surrendered when I didn’t flinch. “The Twentieth/Early Twenty First History curriculum.”

“Seriously?” That had literally been the first thing he had done when Eino tapped him as a possible successor.

“I didn’t budge on points even he admitted he would have, out of fear of offending people.”

“Which is a fear you very much lack,” I pointed out.

“The truth is the truth. Coating it in sugar only makes it taste worse.” He shrugged nonchalantly before suddenly looking dangerously like he was thinking again. “There’s two of them.”

“Yes, Arthur. Hanna and Paravati are, in fact, two distinct and separate women-type-lady-people.”

“Thank you, Fee, I was well aware.” I suppressed a growl at the nickname - he knew I hated it. “I meant, only one can win the election, smartass.”

“Better to be a smartass than a dumbass,” I muttered.

“Sophia, you are forty five. Please grow up just a hair?”

“Tyche doesn’t want to be HR forever, you know.”

That brought his mind to a visibly screeching halt. “Wait, what?”

“What what?” I asked. “She does it because she is phenomenal at it, but it isn’t her passion.  She only stuck around as long as she did to make sure I didn’t trip over a chair and brain myself while I was at work.  When I’m gone, she’s gone, loser take the spoils.”

He whistled softly before shaking his head. “It’s bizarre to think of you two retiring around the same time I’m just starting the position.”

“I’ll have been a Councilor for a decade when I step down,” I pointed out.  I almost included unless I die first, but that never seemed to be as funny as I thought it was.

“But you aren’t that much older than me,” he sighed dramatically. “Anti-aging technology is frustrating.”

“Annnnd this is a natural extension of your career, with a ten year break thereabouts the middle.”  My grin was so bright it made him scowl before I finally got a begrudging smile.  “Think of it as getting elected head of the school board.”

The groan he let out probably echoed for several levels throughout the ship. I had basically just pointed out that he was becoming that which he most hated.

Or not. He seemed to recover with a gleam in his eye. “Pfft. Dean of Students, at the very least.”

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[youcantundothepast]

second chances - Javid

I posted this before with spongebob gifs but I cringed whenever I saw it so I’m editing and getting rid of the gifs so here it is 

Jack took a deep breath and he straightened his dark grey blazer. To say he was nervous would be an understatement. He couldn’t screw this up. He lost Davey once, he couldn’t lose him again. Anxiety coursed through his veins as his fingers instinctively went to play with the rings that had been on his finger for 3 years of his life. But they weren’t there anymore. Instead, they were safely tucked away in a box under his bed, and Jack hadn’t dared to look at them since the divorce. He remembered the night he had to take them off. There was a tan mark, but it had now faded into nonexistence as the years had passed.

Jack and Davey getting married was a mistake. They were too young, only 19, and they were just getting a taste of adult life. Jack knew they both made mistakes they deeply regretted, but it was too late. Both of them were too caught up in their work. Jack with his art, and Davey with his writing. When they were 22, they split. The marriage had just become too much for both of them to handle as they both tried to find a stable career. At least the divorce wasn’t too messy. It was nowhere near the cleanest it could’ve been, and there had been a few big fights; but it wasn’t the worst it could’ve been. It was obvious neither wanted to let the other go, but it was for the greater good. Now, they were 27 and had settled out of each other’s life.

That night would be the first time Jack had talked to Davey in 4 years. After the divorce, he couldn’t bring himself to call because Davey didn’t seem to make an attempt to call him, locking them into a non-communicative stalemate. When Davey had called out of the blue and suggested dinner, Jack had to stop himself for accepting it a second after the words left his mouth. Why would Davey ask him to dinner so suddenly? Was he coming to this dinner to rub that fact that he was happy with a new husband and a few kids in Jack’s face? The thought made Jack have to wipe a few tears from his eyes. Maybe he was too late. Or maybe Davey was just coming to reconcile and that’s all.

Thoughts of every kind plagued him all the way to the restaurant sending his mind into a frenzy.

When he actually walked into the restaurant, though, only good memories filled his thoughts. It was always his and Davey’s favorite restaurant, they went for every one of their anniversaries. It was where they proposed to each other. He couldn’t help the smile that creeped onto his face. Maybe the better wording for his thoughts would be that he couldn’t help still being on love with Davey.

“Can I help you, sir?” the host asked as Jack walked up to the podium.

“Yeah, uh has anyone come for the reservation for Jacobs-Kelly?” Jack asked, making his heart beat faster. He hadn’t heard those two last names together in forever. After the divorce, both went back to their respective last names, but he put the reservations as that because that’s what name they always put their reservations in. Even before they were married. Would Davey remember? He wasn’t sure what to expect from Davey anymore. 5 years might not have seemed that long of a time, but it seemed to trudge one slowly for Jack.

The host looked down at his monitor and looked back up to say, “no, but your table is ready now.” Jack nodded and followed the host to a table near the back of the room. It was in one of the darker parts of the restaurant, but Jack knew Davey wouldn’t mind. He waited for a few minutes, looking down at his watch every thirty seconds. He made sure to be early. The thing was, he was 13 minutes early so looking down at his watch at least 26 times soon got tiring. He sighed, realizing the only thing he could do was wait patiently.

Slowly, the minutes counted down until it was finally 7:59. He knew Davey would be there right at 8:00 because that was what Davey did. He never failed to be right on the dot. Before he knew it, his ex-husband was walking towards the table. “Hi,” Davey breathed out, as if he had been holding his breath for the last 5 years.

“H-Hi.” All they could do was look at each other and noticed everything that had changed. Jack’s hair was a little shorter and more well kept. He wasn’t as muscular as he was in his teens because he had a job that took up most of his time where he would’ve been playing baseball with his friends or running through the streets to figure out what trouble they could stir up during his teen years. He was still in shape, just didn’t have as much muscles on his arms.

Davey, on the other hand, seemed like he hadn’t changed at all. His dark hair was still well kept, and it was obvious he still picked at his nails when he was anxious. He kept his hands under the table when he sat, but Jack could tell what he was doing by the way he was also chewing the corner of his lip. It was like Jack had gone back in time and was sitting across from his still-husband. If he could, maybe he’d stop them from ever having to have this meeting. “So, uh, how have you been?”

Davey only smiled, looking down at his lap, probably realizing Jack was just as nervous as he was. “I’m actually doing pretty good. I’ve gotten a stable job at a local middle school not far from here. The kids, surprisingly, don’t make me want to cry in a corner so it’s pretty nice,” he joked making Jack smile. He couldn’t help but think about how the strangers around him probably thought the two were a couple. One thing they hadn’t ever lost over the years was the sparkle in their eyes when they were looking at the other. “You?”

“I’m doing pretty good. Albert taught me how to use a computer, and I’m a free-lance graphic designer right now. I got some good commissions going on. It’s been working itself out pretty nicely,” Jack shrugged. He had never been the best with technology, a real citizen of yesterday as some people called it, and Davey knew that from the look of surprise on his face.

“Wow. That’s really cool. My boss, the principal, is working on this new program with the school board and they’re actually looking for someone to design the logo. I could recommend you if you’re not too busy with your other work,” Davey offered. It was obvious he never lost touch of his caring, concerned side. “I hear it could pay pretty well.”

“That would actually be pretty cool. Thanks Dave.” After that, the air between them was dead. What do you say to your ex-husband whom you still love?

“I’m, uh, just wondering, did you keep the ring?” Davey asked, picking at his nails like crazy. “Both of them?”

“Of course, I did. I’d never dream of selling them or anything. Did you?” Jack wasn’t going to lie, the thought of Davey selling the true sign of their love away for a few bucks hurt more than he thought it would’ve.

“No no no. I’d never. I’m sorry if I made you think that.” Jack just sighed, feeling his heart clench. They both needed to hear those words. He reached across the table and grabbed Davey’s fidgeting hands and held them. Something he always did when he could tell his husband was stressed. The feeling of his familiar. smooth hands made him relax. They both needed this badly.

“I’m sorry, Davey. About everything. Things were said that shouldn’t of been, and I miss you. I understand if you don’t want to start up a relationship like we had once before, but I still want you to be in my life, even as just a friend. We ended on not-so-great terms, and I don’t want this to be our end. So, what do you say?”

Davey had a dazed look on his face for a second and Jack wasn’t sure what to take from it. He had known his for practically 20 years, but not once had he ever seen Davey with that expression before. After Jack’s heart stopped, waiting for a response, he smiled and squeezed Jack’s hands. “I’m sorry about what I said as well,” he said with the most beautiful smile. Jack had never been so relieved to see his beautiful smile again. “But, if it’s okay with you, I think more than friends would suffice. So, what do you say, Jack Kelly?” 

Jack smiled as well, taking Jack’s other hand within his own so both of their hands were intertwined on top of the table. “I believe in second chances if you do, Dave.”

“I do.” 

[1dfangirls35]

Voir Dire- N.H

A fake dating AU about contracts, soulmates and risking it all for love.

Masterlist // Tell Me What You Think!

A/N: I’m back!! The past month and a half has been craziness! My ER rotation had me working ALL THE TIME. But now thanks to coronavirus, my rotations have been cancelled at least for the next three weeks (maybe longer) and now we get the stress of wondering if we will get to graduate in December. So for the next few weeks I’ll be listening to Heartbreak Weather on repeat and (hopefully) updating Voir Dire!

sixteen

Kelsey checked the time. Again. The numbers glared at her from the brightness of her phone screen. 

3:01pm

The results were supposed to be sent out at 3.

Did she not get registered? Had they lost her test? Had she given them the wrong email? Kelsey's mind was racing through a million reasons as to why her LSAT score wasn't coming through her inbox at this precise moment.

Two weeks ago, Kelsey had sat in front of a computer with a hope of redeeming herself. Unlike the first time she'd taken the LSAT, this time she had been calm and collected. She had started the morning off with breakfast in bed and a large cup of coffee courtesy of Chef Niall, himself. He'd walked her to the door as she left his house, holding her in his arms and whispering in her ear "You've got this". And that morning she did. She felt like she had it.

But as another minute ticked by on the clock, she began to doubt that she'd "got this" all over again.

Kelsey refreshed the page again. Still nothing.

"Refreshing that page fifty million times isn't going to make it load any faster darling," Niall said sternly, placing his head into Kelsey's shoulder a little further. Kelsey had told Niall several times that there was no need for him to be with her when the results came in. She could handle the relief or disappointment all on her own. But then he reminded her that she'd been with him on his big night, the least he could do was return the favor, and he "didn't even have to change out of the sweats" for it. And she had to admit, leaning against Niall's chest as she refreshed the page for the tenth time was kind of nice.

"They should be up by now, it's..." Kelsey watched her screen refresh once more, this time a new email popping up. "Oh my god it's here." She felt her heart begin to race, and shoved the phone into Niall's hands. "Open it."

"It's your score, you should open it," Niall argued back, trying to push the phone back into Kelsey's grasp.

She shook her head adamantly. "I can't do it Ni, please." Niall looked at Kelsey's pleading eyes, they are filled with a fear he hasn't seen across them in a while.

He knew she was nervous. She'd worked so hard for this over the past year. He had tried his best this morning to rehearse what he was going to say if it all went south. He hoped it wouldn't. And as stood in front of his mirror, coming up with all the wonderful things that he hoped would make Kelsey realize she was so much more than a test score, he realized how silly it all was. Because she was going to pass. There wasn't a doubt in his mind.

He sighed. "Fine." He clicked open the message, taking his own deep breath before reading.

Kelsey tried to read Niall's eyes as he opens the email. But he kept his poker face strong, which only antagonized her more. "Well?" she asked.

Niall raised an eyebrow with a smirk as he watched Kelsey squirm in her seat on the couch. "172, that's great Kels!"

"172," Kelsey repeated slowly, hardly believing her ears. "Are you sure you read that right? It's not like a 127 or something?"

"Kels," Niall said, bringing the phone in front of Kelsey's face. "It's a 172. You killed it."

Kelsey read the numbers for herself, seeing that Niall was indeed correct. "I'm going to law school," Kelsey breathed.

"You're going to law school Kels. I never doubted it for a minute." He planted a kiss on her forehead, wrapping his arms around her in an almost smuggling embrace.

"I did it. I DID IT," the volume of Kelsey's voice raises with each word she said. She stood up from her place on the couch, pacing circles in the living room. She didn't know what to feel. Relief? Excitement? Pride? A mixture of the three?

Kelsey knew it might seem premature, celebrating a test score when the actual admission was yet to come, but she also couldn't help but feel like she'd overcome the biggest barrier. A barrier that had plagued her for over a year, reminding her of all the things she'd been through and just how fragile her life had been. She had doubted herself so much over the past year, her self-confidence had vanished, and this- this score, was proving to her that she wasn't a failure. Her life wasn't a complete mess. And maybe she was coming out of a valley. Maybe she could be at a peak for a while.

"We've got to celebrate," Niall exclaimed, breaking Kelsey away  from her thoughts.

"I've got a bottle of wine in the fridge I've been saving. And I guess Becca has a bag of peanut M &Ms..."

Niall stood up next to Kelsey, placing a finger to her lips before she can even finish her sentence. "Forget the wine and the M&Ms darlin', what's the one thing you want to reward yourself with at the moment?"

"Honestly I could go for some chocolate ice cream. I can text Becca and have her pick some up on her way home..."

"Well let's go get ice cream then," Niall stated. 

Kelsey looked at Niall cautiously, because she couldn't have possibly heard him correctly. "Go get it? Niall you know we can't be seen."

"We can drive through and pick it up can't we? Or I can get out of the car?"

Kelsey gave Niall a questioning look, still unsure of this suggestion. Of all the things to go out in public to do, this seemed like the least important thing on the list. But Niall is unwavering, pulling out his keys from his pocket and dangling them in his hands like a treat. 

"This is a special occasion Kelsey. I don't care what you say we are going to get that ice cream. Twenty minutes there and back. No one will be the wiser."

Kelsey sighed, knowing that this was one thing that Niall wasn't going to change his mind about. She reached out and grabbed his hand, following him to the door. She locked the apartment behind them, as Niall headed down the elevator to grab the car. 

Kelsey couldn't tell if she was high on excitement because of her LSAT or because she was riding in the passenger seat of Niall's car for the first time since they had "broke up" in the eyes of the label. No longer hidden behind the blacked out rear windows of a sleek black escalade, Kelsey felt on top of the world. Nothing could be better than her hand intertwined with Niall's as the LA sunshine warmed them through the windows and Niall's album played softly in the background. 

Kelsey began to wonder what she had worried about when they pulled up to the ice cream drive-thru. There are no other cars in sight, and no one paid a second glance to the messy haired brunette with the thick sunglasses pulling up to the window. Niall ordered a hot fudge sundae with extra fudge, Kelsey a chocolate malt with Reese's. 

"Mmmm," Kelsey said taking a bite out of her treat. "This was a good choice."

"Told you to just trust me," Niall smiled, setting his cup in the center console as they pulled away. 

"I'm so proud of you," Niall said, gazing at Kelsey in a way that made her heart flutter. 

Kelsey smiled. She was pretty damn proud of herself too. 

************************************************

The second Kelsey saw the email from Mr. Alan Michaels she knew they were in trouble. There was no subject, but somehow without even opening it, Kelsey knew exactly what it was going to contain.

The contents were simple.

Miss Benton,

If you know what's good for him, you'll meet with me tomorrow at 10 am sharp. I trust you''ll keep this meeting to yourself. I would hate for another party to become involved and complicate our resolution.

Sincerely,

Alan Michaels 

There was one attachment. But Kelsey didn't need to click the image to know what they'd been caught doing. Suddenly, she wished she hadn't been craving ice cream yesterday after all.

"What's wrong love?" Niall asked, as Kelsey quickly exited out of the message. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Nothing," Kelsey said, trying her best to form a fake smile and grabbing his hand again. "Now tell me more about this set design."

Niall began rambling on. About lights, guitars, set lists and which songs he was most excited to play live. But all Kelsey could think about was the email sitting in her inbox. 

Her mind began to race with all the things that this could mean. What exactly could his label do? Niall had warned her once before that the music industry could be a brutal environment. She knew that there were consequences to every action, consequences that could ruin careers if certain rules or agreements weren't followed. 

Kelsey wanted to believe that she wasn't scared of these people. She wasn't in a contract with them, and therefore, she had no obligation to even entertain the idea of meeting with them. She owed them nothing. And she certainly did have to play by their rules. 

She thought about showing the message to Niall. But each time she went to bring it up, something stopped her. She knew what that something was.

Niall would take the fall. He would risk the loss of his music, his tour, his livelihood, all for Kelsey. Kelsey knew it. But she wasn't going to allow that to happen. She wouldn't allow him to sacrifice what he had worked so hard on, the career that he so loved- for her. 

"Kels," Niall nudged her his elbow at Kelsey, whose gaze was fixated on the corner of the room. "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing," Kelsey replied quickly, snapping her gaze back to Niall and shooting him a smile. "Just tired." She rested her head on Niall's shoulder. 

"You sure you're okay?" Niall asked again. Kelsey had been acting off over the past few hours, and he couldn't figure out why. She wasn't the best at hiding her racing thoughts. 

Kelsey turned, placing her hands on either side of Niall's cheeks and staring into his icy blue eyes. "Niall, I'm great. I've got the LSAT score of my dreams and an incredible man who I love more than anything and who loves me. What more could I need?"

"I love you," Niall replied, planting a kiss on Kelsey's lips.

"It's just been a long week for me. A good week but a long one," Kelsey mused as she snuggled deep into Niall's arms. She inhaled deeply, basking in musky, cool scent of Niall's cologne. She didn't want to think about what their relationship might look like if she attended the meeting tomorrow. Or what it might look like if she didn't. 

When Kelsey got back to her apartment later that evening, she poured herself the biggest glass of wine she could find. Kelsey knew Niall had found it odd that she was leaving his house so early in the evening, but she brushed it off as needing some rest. She couldn't bear to tell him the truth: that every minute she sat in his apartment her anxiety about just what would happen at the meeting tomorrow was growing exponentially. 

Kelsey tipped back her glass of Moscato, gulping it down like a housewife at a dinner party gone awry. Becca walks into the kitchen at that precise moment, giving Kelsey a side-eyed smile. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Kelsey answered quickly. The word was slipping off her tongue easier the more times she said it. 

The email had been explicit: no outside parties. Plus Kelsey already knew what Becca would say. Becca ask why Niall was even considering negotiating with the label when he had the power of his fanbase and the media to shift the story. A story of forbidden love? According to Becca, people eat that shit up. 

"Hmm let's see," Becca scratched her forehead, leaning over the kitchen countertop. "You're back from Niall's before 10pm, you are chugging a glass of wine like its a magic elixir, and you keep glancing at your phone like its going to jump out at you. There's a lot more than nothing going on, so pour me a glass and spill."

Kelsey sighed, grabbing another glass from the cupboard and pouring Becca a glass and herself a refill. She clicked open her phone to the email and slid it across the counter to Becca, watching as Becca's face turns from a sly grin to a face of concern.

"Well for starters, Niall needs a new agent," Becca said, clearly trying to lighten the mood. "But this is messed up Kels. Seems like more of a threat than a suggestion."

"More like blackmail," Kelsey replies with a roll of her eyes. She makes her way into the living room, sliding down onto the couch before taking another lengthy sip of her wine. 

"What did Niall say about this?"

Kelsey stayed quiet.

"Kelsey..." Becca stared her down. "You didn't mention this to him?"

"The message didn't exactly sound like they wanted him to know about it."

"And so you thought he didn't need to know that his label is basically blackmailing you to break up with him?" Becca responded. 

"Niall," Kelsey began, taking a deep breath. "Niall thinks with his heart. I didn't want to tell him and have him make a rash decision based on what he was feeling. Especially with something like his career."

"But you don't even know what they want Kels," Becca argued. 

"I'm pretty sure what they want is for me to not see Niall anymore. They made that very clear the first time we met with them." Kelsey's mind flashed back to the last time she visited the Capitol Records office. It wasn't a memory she looked back upon fondly. Her heart raced just thinking about being in that situation again.

"Are you going to meet with them this time?" Becca asked.

"I think that whatever they tell me at that meeting has to be a far better alternative than if I ignore the meeting in the first place."

"What's the worst thing they can do to you Kels? Being in love with their musician isn't illegal," Becca reassured. "Besides, Niall already released his music. He's a former member of One Direction, no one's gonna pass up on the opportunity to sign that moneymaker to their label."

Becca had a point. The worst Capitol Records could do to Kelsey was a slap on the wrist and a warning that she shouldn't see Niall again. A lot of bad things could happen to Niall because of this, a cancelled tour, a loss of his contract...but maybe none of that was career-altering. For a moment, Kelsey thought that she's made up her mind. That maybe going to this meeting was doing exactly what Capitol wanted her to do. They wanted her to be scared into being their pawn.

But then Kelsey remembered what Niall told her back in the beginning. About the music industry be far more connected than you would think. About being blacklisted from every record label in the country. She thought about Niall sitting on his couch strumming his guitar to a melody that had just surfaced in his mind. Or the way his blue eyes glowed when he told her about the feeling he got hearing an amphitheater full of people singing the words he wrote back to him. 

Becca could tell Kelsey was still deep in thought, and so she stood, walking to the kitchen and placing her now empty glass in the sink. "Whatever you decide Kels, I'm here, okay." Becca walked towards her room. As she reached the doorway, she turned around, meeting eyes with Kelsey again. "Besides now they have to come after both of us."

Becca's comment turned Kelsey's lips into a small smile, even if just for a moment. Kelsey made her way to her bedroom, sliding under the grey comforter and burying her head into her pillow. Her mind racing with a million thoughts.

She loved Niall. More than she had ever loved anyone before. The selfish thing would be to not go to the meeting. To be defiant and keep Niall to herself. But the world needed Niall Horan and his music. And Niall Horan needed his music more than he would ever need Kelsey, even if he didn't know it. 

So she would go to the meeting. And she would listen to the terms. And if it came down to dating Niall and his music career, well, she would pick his career. Because he wasn't going to pick it for himself.

As she lay in bed, her phone buzzed with another notification: an email. 

Tomorrow. 10 am sharp.

Tag List: @awomanindeniall​ @ihearthemcallingforyou @niall-is-my-dream​ @stylishmuser​ @thicksniall

[13ceremonialskrp]

                              STEP LIGHTLY, CHILDREN OF THE MOON

THE COVEN WELCOMES THE MIDNIGHT CEREMONIAL, KANA TAKEDA, A 27 YEAR OLD SCRYING WITCH

idiosyncrasy

+ authoritative, trustworthy, assertive

- dismissive, overbearing, presumptuous

proficiency

strength : she is gifted with a particularly strong penchant for finding things and people across great or short distances, through her mirrors and crystal balls– it’s how she’s come to find many of her coven members and how she manages to show up to places whenever she’s needed, or whenever is most unexpected.

strength : she has a way about her, something born of her spirit and the magic that has infused into every flake of skin, every flutter of eyelashes, every lilt of every syllable that cascades from her ruby-stained lips; there is an atmosphere that clings to her, a vibrating intoxication, the very gravity she wields as a weapon, hovering around her like an aura. it’s nearly tangible, threatening when she needs it to be, calming when others need it to be, a haunting presence she carries with her in each taken step.

ineptitude

weakness : divining the future has always been more difficult for this witch, the oncoming storm of events oftentimes becoming muddled or fuzzy in her crystals and reflective surfaces, and the harder she attempts to look into them, the more strenuous and painful it becomes. plenty of mirrors and crystals have broken or shattered under the weight of her pressure, her gravity begging to be given a glimpse of a future that plays coy with her.

weakness : she still filters her abilities through a netting of rage and coercion, still presses too hard to get what she wants from her powers, still fights with herself and her mirrors to wrestle the information she desires, and oftentimes it backfires on her in explosive, cutting ways. if a broken mirror costs you seven years bad luck, then kana takeda walks through her shattered hallways with millions of years left on her debt.

sanctions

penalty : most sideshow tricks kana employs don’t take much out of her, but heavier magics and spells require pieces of her soul not many would be willing to sacrifice; every time she gives herself to the magic, her powers breathing life and control over her, she loses a sliver of emotion, fades another step into apathetic despair, into a kind of death. she has died before and each new movement is simply another bill needing paid– eventually she will fade to the grey world altogether and be entirely lost.

penalty : her nights are forever plagued by nightmares, irregardless of how much or how little she sleeps, no matter what soothing tonic she swallows, no matter what spell she put herself under. dreaming will always and forever be a hassle for her, a curse marked upon the back of her neck by the dying fingers of her old coven’s high hand– the one she watched die in a heap of mud and grass.

memoirs

tw: suicide attempt

7. she stands on the cliffs with the winds at her back, the air tugging and pulling at her clothes like a begging lover, the uncharacteristically frayed robe and nightgown whipping at her body tightly, loud and wailing, the roar filling her ears despite the silence that infects her. the storm above her is some comfort at least, knowing that the sometimes the sky cries as well, knowing that sometimes the weight of water becomes too much even for mother nature, until eventually the dam cracks and rain must fall, tears must fall.

kana has been weeping for weeks straight now, the sorrow sinking in marrow-deep until it is all she knows, until it’s all she’s sure she’ll ever know; her hands empty, her life empty, the grey of the world whirling and surrounding her, a poison. it hadn’t taken long after the absence of their son for her husband to lock himself into his study and only come out on an ambulance stretcher, pills filling his gut, freezer-burn covering his eyes, his fingers, the stench of death wafting off him like a curse. she closes watery eyes and listens to the ringing of her eardrums, listens to the pounding of her heart howling against her rib cage, listens to the tides beat themselves against the shoreline, rising up to meet the challenge of the moon, hidden behind thunder. rising up to meet the challenge of her own personal gravity, her own personal hell, hidden behind exhaustion.

when she exhales and falls from the rocks, her shoeless, coatless form cascading downwards into the drink like a teardrop, the cold winds kissing her limbs, wishing her farewell, she prays to the triune goddess, prays for death, prays for the crashing sounds of the sea to swallow her down, down, down, and the crashing sounds of mirrors breaking to crush her, deep, deep, deep. prays for just one more chance to see her son again.

and receives none of it.

1. the mirror glistens cold in the midnight air and finally, finally, this she knows for certain: she is all storm and howling, she is all thunder and power, nothing delicate framed in the cut of her young cheekbones, in the dark of her eyes, in the way her reflection glares back into her like an abyss she no longer fears. her hair a maelstrom havoc from nightmares spent in drenches of sweat and stress, her nightgown torn askew, her soul torn asunder, a stain of red in her wake in the way all women burn scarlet at this particular age, and she decides white is no longer her color, no longer the bliss and innocence she will hide behind, no longer the shade of ribbons her nanny is allowed to tie into her long, black locks.

barely eleven years old, the witchling steps across the shards of the mirror her newly-awakened powers have shattered across her bedroom floor, and in the pieces strewn about, she glimpses her future, she watches her past, she opens the doors to ruin and inevitability, penning the course of her life without truly meaning to. divination shines through her chest and she likens it to a birth, begins screaming, begins breaking, the stars high above her shuddering in reverberating echoes and instinctively she knows: this is the last night of her childhood. from now on, she will adopt the vague apathy of her mother, the grey distance of her father, the frozen poison of her grandmother, and come next morning, she’ll learn why.

she’s sure it’ll have something to do with seven years bad luck.

2. strong magic floods through her veins, a direct lineage to the ancient sorcerers of old, back when the world was half shadow, half spirit, back when human and dragon could be fused into one, and kana believes she is a dragon, believes she is half shadow, believes this is the only explanation as to why she burns deep within herself, why she enjoys selfish magic so much more than anything ivory. she grows in her abilities as she grows in age, surrounding herself with blackened tales, banned guides, abolished spells, memorizing what she can, lavishing in what she wants, her family’s wealth and prestige affording her access to whatever her heart may desire. she’s the singular daughter of one of japan’s forefront fashion and design brands, her parents inheriting a luxurious empire from her grandmother upon the old hag’s death, kana raised amidst these stages and diamonds, limousines and velvet carpets, her appearance and technical prowess in the business granting her plenty of attention herself.

3. she’d assumed, wrongly of course, that somehow her accomplishments in both the fine arts of music and poetry, as well as the physical exertions of martial arts and combat training, would prove her independence enough as a woman capable of ruling alone, capable of reaching through the clouds and swallowing the stars themselves, capable of breaking the earth’s crust in the gravity of her heels, but not to her mother. nothing is ever enough for her mother. at eighteen years old, kana is given in an arranged marriage to a man eleven years her senior, the heir to an even bigger technological conglomerate, a man forever scented in cigar smoke and ink, a man with tired eyes and small burn scars on his knuckles.

she asks him one night across the stretch of silk sheets, the dimmed glow hovering around their bodies, where he’d gotten the scars, and he tells her that he used to own a pair of tiny dragons who’d scorch him all the time when he fed them. just like her. she snorts and looks away, but it’s the first moment she doesn’t outright despise him.

5. she glows with promise in the heart of her coven, a star in her own right, a sun on the horizon of life, her mother-priestess and the high hand naming her the maiden archetype, granting her the possibility of tutelage, of eventually becoming a priestess herself. she impresses them with her hold over her own abilities, her potency, her knowledge, her skill, the way she masters the basic practices, the way she convinces the world that she is a hurricane made flesh, a dragon brought home in the center of her chest. she harnesses her craft through anger and clenched teeth, through red lipstick and curled knuckles, through the half-shadow she drags by its ankles, the curses she breathes and the fire she bleeds, and she can almost feel everything she’s ever wanted in her grasp, all the power a sharded young girl could ever need, could ever have been wrong about in the pieces of shattered reflections across her bedroom floor. she’d never had any reason to be so worried– it would all be fine.

mirror mirror on the wall….

6. it is exactly the equinox of the spell, the midway point when she realizes she has been tricked, she has been fooled, she has made the gravest error of her life– or more specifically, she has failed in her trick of the others, the pin-needles all shifting suddenly towards her, the sharpened sting of betrayal and white-hot understanding flooding through her, icing her blood in a way entirely foreign to her. she’s been young before, been inexperienced before, been wandering and stretching and hungry before, but fear? fear is a monster heavy on her lungs in this moment, claws and jaws digging in and robbing her of breath, of sight, of atmosphere. fear is her reaction to being out of control, and in these two very separate thousand-year-moments, two beats that will forever define her and deform her from now on, she has never been more out of control.

the first moment is given to when they take the only thing she’s ever loved before away from her; the young toddler’s face seeping down into the immutability of stone, forever silenced and choked away from her, life shifting to earth; his tiny, reaching hands, his wide, teary eyes, everything melting down too quickly into permanent solidification, just before she can touch him.

the second is given to when she disappears into the maelstrom of hatred and boiling, tumultuous fury, when she lets her restraint finally, finally become swallowed up by the flames of her internal wraith; the darkness howling up from the unfathomable ocean of her soul, the likes of which had never been seen by her coven before. and would never be seen by them again, not after she’s grinded their bones into the earth they love so damn much.

betrayal tastes bitter, but not as bitter as the dirt and dust she crushes all the bones in their bodies into– all twelve of them writhing and gasping in simultaneous horror.

4. when she bears a child, a boy, her firstborn, she comes to the belief that he is the truest form of the sun incarnate, the belief that he is all light and all laughter, tiny hands and toes and eyelashes even longer than hers, and he’s the first boy she’s ever loved quite so much in her entire life. she was raised from one nanny to the next, but she’ll be damned if she lets anyone else so much as touch him for any extended period of time, insisting on raising him herself, insisting on hoarding all his first giggles and first steps and first words, dazzling him with the magic she becomes more and more involved with.

he is every golden memory, every reason to fall in love with life itself, every belief in the cosmos she’d never truly had before. he’s perfect and she occasionally has a difficult time believe he could have come from her.

8. when the men are finally able to revive her, rouse her from her drenched, unconscious state, she sputters awake like the lifting of a curse from her skin, coughing and hacking up mouthfuls of salt water, wheezing air into her lungs as though they’ve never felt so free before, as though she’s never felt so released before, her arms and fingers reaching and grasping onto anything sturdy enough to hold her. she is as wet as a fish, having been mistaken for a mermaid by a fishing crew and hauled up on deck in an effort to save her life, dressed in almost nothing, floating adrift in the middle of the sea currents that separate two countries from each other. she blinks at the faces of the men surrounding her limp, shivering frame, the sky as grey as she remembers it, and before one of them can manage to fetch her a towel or a blanket, she asks what’s happened.

“we found you in the water. you stopped breathing, we thought you were dead.” the man, presumably the captain, bellows in korean– which is all kana needs to know about where she is and where she’s heading.

“are we near a port?” she asks in perfect korean, having been trained in up to five different languages, beaten into her skillset until perfection.

“busan.”

busan. that’s it then. the veil of the world is drawn back for her in that instant, clarity finally descending upon her like a beam of light, a calling she cannot and must not ignore or refuse. the goddesses have seen fit to spare her life for a purpose and she knows what she must do, what she owes not just simply to them but also to the world at large– blood for blood. she has a debt now, a payment she must make in life for what she’s taken from it, for the havoc she’s wreaked, for the evil she’s lathered across her palms, spread over her flesh like ointment. the goddesses won’t allow her peace until she’s fulfilled her role, until she’s given back in the amount that she’s taken. balance.

busan.

[jeminy3]

FIRESIDE - Chapter 4

4. isn't it hard to make up your mind?

WARNINGS: crying about feelings, gay shit, smoking

This chapter's too short on its own, but too long to stick onto another one, and I wanted to keep the chapter names thematically relevant with the song lyrics.

Read on AO3

Read on Google Docs

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 5

Breathe. Just breathe, Havoc thinks, forehead pressed against his steering wheel. Okay. It's okay.

He lifts his head, leans back against his car seat. He wipes his eyes dry with one hand, stares out across Headquarters' parking lot, his breath slowing down, growing easier. Huh. He actually feels better instead of worse. That was probably the best cry he's had in months. Years, even. A regular 'good cry,' completely bawling your eyes out just to get it all out of you.

He leans forward, folds his arms over the top of the steering wheel, rests his chin on his hands. He lets his sore, puffy eyes gaze out through the windshield, unfocused.

Just tell him you love him.

...It was that simple after all, wasn't it?

All this pain, all this aching... it was just love, huh? He'd been so scared that it was something so much bigger, more complicated - Well, to be honest, it still is. And it still hurts, but... at least now it has a name to it.

He definitely feels better than he did last night, at least. God, last night was terrible. After leaving the bar, he got so caught up in trying to stop crying that he could barely concentrate on driving back to his apartment, and he didn't get much sleep when he got there. He spent hours tossing and turning deep into the night, plagued by an ache in his chest that's been there for years, now.

He really only noticed it when he lost his legs, come to think of it. Back then he figured it was just the natural symptoms of a freshly-broken heart. It only made sense after his experience with 'Solaris' -  not every day that you find out your latest girlfriend is actually an immortal monster woman who tries to kill you via stabbing her claws through your back. Even more uncommon to lose all use of your legs from the ensuing spine injury, but then get them magically restored through a miracle of Alchemy at the behest of your commanding officer.

Mustang... he's in love with him. Huh.

Havoc thought he already knew what love was, what it felt like. It was his bread and butter, he thought, a skill that he'd honed over the course of his dating life. You meet a girl, you talk to her, you click with her, you hit it off. Be confident, but not a jerk about it, be flattering, but not a kiss-ass, be yourself, but also a gentleman. If she warms up to you, great, if she doesn't, let her go gracefully. And if all goes well, you get those warm fuzzies with her, she gets them with you, and you can see yourself having fun with her, whether that be at a restaurant or in your bedroom. And hopefully, that can turn into something real and long-lasting, and then you can see yourself settling down with her.

But apparently, that wasn't love at all.

Because this wasn't something you did or got better at, this was a force of nature. A storm that grew in size and strength and power until it tore through your heart, your head, your entire being, without making a sound the entire time. And you don't even see it coming until it's too late - and you're in too deep.

It's someone you're suddenly working under that you're not sure what to think of, but there's something strange about them, something you can't quite explain. He's someone you learn to respect and to trust, not just with your paychecks or your life, but with a dream, a future for your country that you and the rest of your team all believe in.

Then he's someone you befriend, and they become more than just your boss or future leader, he becomes... well, a person. With thoughts, feelings, hopes, doubts, fears. Someone who likes watching the clouds through office windows, holding pen caps in his mouth and lightly chewing on them, his coffee with extra cream and three lumps of sugar, no more, no less. And when he's your drinking buddy after work, he likes his alcohol just as sweet, whether it's fruity gin or hearty rum. And you'll tease him endlessly for his "girly" tastes but he'll always justify that it gives him an edge on stealing your woman for the night, since if he drinks on her level it makes him more relatable to her. And he's right, the bastard.

...But then you'll hear him sobbing quietly in a bathroom stall later that night, when he thinks he's alone and can't bear his broken heart anymore. And you know it's because of what happened with Hughes, and everything else in his life, and you know you should say something, anything - but you don't. You stay silent, do your business, and leave quietly, giving him the benefit of his privacy... and his dignity. Even when deep down, your heart screams otherwise.

He's someone with dark hair and dark eyes that've seen far too many horrors and tragedies to still be so deep with knowledge, so sparkling with mirth, so intense with fire. He's got an impressive smile when he's confident, and a beautiful one when he's genuine. A strong chin but soft cheeks, broad shoulders but a small waist, this mix of stern and masculine but slight and elegant, all at once.

And his hands seem strong and calloused, but because he wears gloves and does paperwork most of the time, they're always soft and smooth when you shake them. And you've only touched each other casually like this, but here and there your eyes wander over his shirt collars and short sleeves, how his pants cling to his hips. Sometimes your skin prickles at any little brush of contact, and you keep thinking and wondering and dreaming 'till you're so hot and aching alone in your bed that you have to satisfy yourself with fantasies of him. And you’re completely ashamed of yourself because he’s your boss, for crying out loud, what are you doing? But no matter how you try to justify it to yourself, you do it anyway. You blame it on stress, or boredom, or being so pent-up from striking out with girls all the time that you're just desperate, that's all. It's like a phase, you'll get over it eventually...

But you don't, because you're in love with him.

And it all makes sense now - not just the aching (physically and emotionally), but all the other feelings too, feelings Havoc's had and couldn't explain the origin of. The fact that he thinks about him more than he thinks of himself. The fact that, honestly? He'd do anything for him, absolutely anything, just say the word - even lay down his life for him, if it really came down to it. And sure, that's what's expected of him in their line of work, but deep down, he wouldn't really do it because he's supposed  to - he'd do it because he wants to. He wants this - has wanted this - for a long time, now.

Havoc sighs, long and hard, closing his eyes. How long has it been... Eight years? Yeah, jeeze... almost eight years since he first met Roy Mustang. So much has happened... but in terms of this particular situation, not much has happened at all, really. Ever since his promotion, he's been content to remain one of Mustang's most trusted subordinates and friends, but nothing more. He's been biding his time, going through the motions, ignoring this feeling that's only grown stronger with time instead of fading away. Because he didn't know anything about it - didn't think about it too much, didn't want to face it. Kept it under tight lock and key while fooling himself otherwise, kept aimlessly pursuing women when what he really wanted was right in front of him all this time.

Even when Roy saved his life, saved his legs, refused to abandon him even when Havoc begged him to. On top of the other dozens of times Roy's saved his ass, Havoc doesn't deserve the time of day from him anymore, honestly.

And yet his heart says otherwise, Havoc thinks, opening his eyes and leaning back against the driver's seat. He retrieves his cigarette pack, thumbs out another joint into his mouth, but as he sets it back down, his mind wanders, and he doesn't particularly feel like fishing out his lighter. He's thinking about Roy - has been this whole time, really, but it's particularly intense now. He's seeing his face, his smile, his eyes. His bare hands, his bare neck, his bare chest as he travels further. He imagines the scent of his skin, the feel of him under his hands, the taste of him on his lips-

...Damn. He really does have it bad. Why didn't anyone tell him he could fall head over heels for another man just as hard as a woman?

Havoc bothers his unlit cigarette with his teeth, shifting his jaw. Well, his friends did, just now. Practically shoved it right under his nose. And yet he still tried to deny it, yelling and losing control like a fucking idiot just because he was too damn scared to admit otherwise. Yeah, that's what he was - a scared idiot. Pushing his feelings away, spying on Mustang from bar corners, being shitty to women he wasn't even interested in to begin with, he just dragged them along to keep up the charade. And then blowing up on his friends when they were just trying to help? Yeah, fits the bill.

Havoc straightens himself, sitting up in his seat and wiping his eyes again. There's a well-deserved wave of shame settling over him now, but still, his chest feels lighter, his head feels clearer, his tears are spent. The pain's out of him now, mostly. All that's left to do now is... well, like Breda said - just tell Roy how he feels.

Whether Roy felt the same way or not was... terrifying, honestly, but Havoc supposes that in the grand scheme of things, it wasn't that important if he could finally get this off his chest after all this time. And honestly, Havoc wasn't sure what Roy would even see in him to begin with - he's still just a simple man from the countryside, after all.

...But he'd definitely be lying if a very small (but very loud) part of him wasn't hoping for Roy to love him back with even a fraction of what he felt for him. God, just imagine - him and Roy, together... Just entertaining the thought makes his face warm and his heart flutter.

...Havoc rubs at his face again, snapping himself out of another bout of spacing-out. Okay- okay, now, he's getting distracted. No need for all this daydreaming. Can't be thinking too much and not doing anything about it, or he'll just end up right back in his old ways again - and he can't afford that, not anymore. Not when he finally knows what he needs to do now. Confessing to Roy - yeah, yeah. He can do that. It'll be hard, really hard, but... he can do it. He just has to... get him alone, somehow? Meet him after work? Or maybe during work, in his office. Like a private meeting, or something. No no, that's not- that's inappropriate, he should stick to after-hours... But then, where-

Havoc shakes his head, blinks himself free of a potential spiral into his own anxiety. He muscles open his car door and steps out, standing and giving himself easy access to his pockets and lighter. He lights his cigarette, finally, taking a long, slow drag to ease his nerves before they start acting up again. One thing at a time, Jean, one thing at a time, he thinks. Cross that bridge when you come to it. His real first order of business should be getting out of this parking lot, back into Central Headquarters, and apologizing to his friends for being an asshole just now. Then figure out the confession stuff. Yeah.

Havoc exhales, letting out a lazy cloud of smoke. He'll probably be rejected when he does, but, still... maybe not? Roy does tend to smile at him an awful lot... and he's caught him staring at him sometimes, or shrugging away awkwardly when they've been too close, so...

Havoc takes another, smaller drag, relaxing further. Then he closes his car door, locks it, and starts his way across the parking lot, feeling steady on his feet, determined. This new prospect is a little scary - well, really scary, but Havoc's never backed down from a challenge before, and he's certainly not going to start now.

...Hopefully.

[babbushka]

My secret is all my friends on Tumblr I hold so dear in my heart as if we were IRL/not internet friends and my mom makes me feel bad about it because YES I know I’ll probably never meet them but I think about them every day and try to message them and talk to them about life and stuff and just yeah. I fear maybe I care too much?? But even just saying that feels wrong because I’m like no they’re my friends and I just worry maybe I bother them by saying hi or checking in because we only talk online?? :(

Hello my dear anon! I can understand your moms apprehension about having internet friends and caring about them, because she most likely grew up in an era where that just Was Not A Thing. But that doesn’t mean that your friends aren’t real, or that they don’t love you, or that they don’t care about you. They do, I promise you. 

Sometimes, particularly in stressful times like the plague we’re living through, people’s lives outside of the internet become too hectic or too draining for them to be as active or as sociable as they were -- but that is not a reflection on you whatsoever. Life just can be a lot and sometimes people need time to themselves, this is true for all of us. 

The internet has ...many many failings. But it also has done something incredible, it’s given us the ability to meet and connect with people that we never would have been able to know otherwise. And I really do think that’s beautiful. Caring for friends, whether they’re in person or online, is a beautiful opportunity that we as people get to take part in. 

I think that it’s easy to forget that people live on their own timelines in their own lives. Especially if we’re used to talking to someone every single day, and then suddenly something changes and we only speak maybe once a week. That’s okay, because that’s how friendships IRL work too! 

I suppose all I’m trying to say is, try not to let your mom get you too down about having internet friendships that you are passionate about. Your friends are real, your love for them is real. Sometimes friends don’t have the energy to hold a conversation, or sometimes they need to step away for their own sake, and that’s okay. We’re all just people after all, doing our best. 

I’m sending you my love, and hope that you know your friends love you very much too. Because they do <3 

[wonderfulworldofwinchester]

Too Much Drama Mama

Dean x Reader, Best Friend!Sam x Reader 

Request By Anon: heeey, so, you must be quiet fed up with all the dean x reader requests, but i just can't help it, i love that man and your writing so much D: may I request one where the reader lives in the bunker and mary has a conflict with her and wants the boys to kick the reader out but they refuse and ask mary to leave instead if the reader bothers her so much? maybe dean x reader + best!friends reader/sam? you can write it whenever you feel about it, i'd be so happy~

Warnings: Drama, Mary being rude to reader, fight between boys and Mary, Language. 

*Unedited- apologies for any spelling/grammar errors, and/or anything that’s funky in it haha.* 

Also, Requests are back open :) 

                                 Masterlist              To Do List

In this line of work, almost nothing is out of the question. You see things you can never in a million years begin to explain. But this. This takes the cake. Mary. Yes, the Mary. The one who burned on the ceiling of Sm’s nursery all those years ago, has suddenly come back to life. Now that is straight up weird. Not to mention, it makes things a little more than awkward around the bunker. 

You had been living with the Winchesters for a little over 3 years now, and it’d been the best 3 years of your life. You had a smokin hot, goofball of a boyfriend in Dean, and the best of best friends that anyone could ever ask for in Sam. You  all were a little quirky in your own way, and often had disagreements, but they were always quickly resolved... for the most part. No one said you were the perfect model family, in fact to anyone looking from the outside in, it would appear to be more than dysfunctional, but somehow you made it work. 

That was until the night she moved in. You had heard about her, and seen pictures that Dean kept in his room, but nothing could have prepared you for the real thing. Hell, nothing could have prepared the boys for the real thing. She seemed sweet enough in the beginning. Often times you felt a little bit for her. She struggled to catch up to the times, and you knew that had to be extremely frustrating to say the least. 

You put so much effort into trying to help her, and trying to be the nicest you could be. You gave her the benefit of the doubt when she started to become snarky, and just flat out rude. She was just under a lot of stress with he new life, and new world, right? Nope, the more and more comfortable she got. The more and more her mouth started running. 

“You could have gotten both of my boys killed tonight!” He voice bellowed through the halls of the bunker. Luckily, Sam and Dean had dropped you two off, and went back it for some supplies, and food. “Why do you even insist on being a hunter? You have no business in this line of work.” 

“I could have gotten them killed!? I wasn’t the one who just burst in and announced her presence to a warehouse full of vamps. You almost got us all killed!” 

She followed you down the hall, never once stopping her barrage of insults. “You should just leave. You put them in danger every second you are here. You make them soft, and leave them vulnerable to attack. They can’t do this job if they have to constantly worry about a little girls scout like you.” 

You turned on your heel so quick, she barely stopped herself from running into you. “Okay, that’s it! You don’t get to just waltz in her and act like you’re in charge!” 

“Excuse me?” She threw her head to the side, and her hands came out to her sides. 

“You heard me. You were gone for their whole lives. Dean was only four, and Sam was a baby. You don’t get to act like you know them. I was the one here cleaning up the mess you left them.” Her face contorted with confusion at your statement. “Yeah that’s right. I know about the little deal you made. I was the one holding your son on the nights the nightmares plagued him, and he couldn’t sleep. You did that to them, and I was here to deal with it. Don’t act like you all the sudden know them better than anyone else! You might be blood, but right now you aren’t acting like family, you’re acting like a damn stuck up, jealous bitch.” 

“Oh I’m being the bitch here, or are you just really that insecure that you think me being back is going take your precious little boy toys away?” 

“You don’t know a damn thing about me, and as far as I’m concerned it can stay that way.” 

No sooner than the last word was out of your mouth, she took a swing at you. Luckily, your reflexes were still in overdrive from the hunt, and you dodged it. Her fist made contact with the wall of the hallway producing a loud bang, closey followed by a “Shit!” from her lips. 

As if right on cue, the bunker door opened just in time to hear it. “Mom? What happened, are you okay?”   Dean’s voice conveyed a sense of worry as he rushed down the stairs and towards the hall where you two were standing. You really weren’t in the mood for a family meeting, so you took off towards the room you shared with him, but your feet didn’t move fast enough and he arrived before you were out of sight. His eyes widened when he saw Mary’s busted knuckles. “What happened!?” 

You turned quickly and beat her to the punch, “She took a swing at me, and busted her hand on the wall. That’s what happened.” Before either of them could say another word, you were off down the hall again, this time managing to successfully escape in your room. 

Dean had come by to check on you, but you didn’t really feel like talking at the moment. He told you he’d be back, and that he was going to go see what she said happened. Upon arrival in the library where Sam had been talking to Mary he found himself in the midst of a very uncomfortable discussion. 

Before he even sat down, she set in. “I don’t like her. Not one bit.-”

“Woah, woah. Why don’t you just slow down a little bit. What’s going on?” Dean inquired. 

“She could have gotten both of you killed. Something tells me it’s not the first time either. You’re both soft around her. She makes you weak. I want her out. She’s bad for my boys.” 

“And if we say no?” Sam questioned. 

“Are you serious? You’re going to choose her over me? Over your own mother? Your flesh and blood?” 

“Blood makes us related. It don’t make you family. We don’t owe you a damn thing! Last I checked, you made that deal, not us. No one put a gun to your head, and made you make that dea!. You got yourself killed, and consequently Dad. Not to mention the messed up shit Sam went through because of it. You didn’t want this life for us, but yet here we are because of the choices you made.” 

“How many times am I going to have to say that I’m sorry for what I did? Besides that, Like I’m the only one at this table, who made a choice that hurt someone else, or made a deal to save someone.” 

“Let me get this straight. You’re asking me to give up the one thing that I love more than enything else in this world, for someone I barely know, and who to be honest, is being a little bit of a dick right now.” The whole room when silent after Dean made his comment. 

Dean’s jaw clenched, “Look, if you really have such a problem with Y/N that you can’t be near her-” his arm came up as he stood from his chair, “there’s the door!” 

Her face was riddled with disbelief, “Sam..?”

“You heard him.” Sam’s voice was flat and seemingly emotionless as he answered. “Get out.” 

Mary had her stuff packed and was out the door in a matter of minutes. Part of you was relieved to have her gone, and to be free of her comments and judgement, but the other part felt guilty becuase after all she was their mother. As you stood their behind the boys as she closed the door behind her, a single tear couldn’t help but make it’s way out. What if you had just ruined the only chance they had to get to know their mother? 

Dean was the first to see the tear. “Oh, no, no, sweetheart, don’t cry.” He had a hand on either side of your face, wiping the tear away with his thumb, and his emerald eyes swept over you. “It’s okay, come here.” He said, pulling you into a warm embrace. Immediately you found comfort in his arms, just like always. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t want anyone here who can’t love my girl.” He knew it made you giggle when he called you his girl . 

Sam came up behind you, and wrapped his long arms around the both of you in a big bear hug. “No one messes with my best friend!” He only made you laugh even harder. Life was pretty sweet with these two. You had it made, and it made your heart swell knowing that they felt they same way about having you around.

If you want to be added to one of my tag lists, just ask :) I have 3 main lists: The Anything and Everything, The Sammy Boy, and The Deano.

The Anything and Everything: @tillielynn16 @fandomaskedstuff @hillface89 @saltysamgirls @naruko88558855 @unusualcorn

The Deano: @angelofchaos @straitsupernaturalmalefan @kayladools @pandazombie69

[unfolded73]

Meta post for This Graceful Path: Killian

earlier posts: general stuff from the first 3 chapters, David and Mary Margaret through Ch.12

Oh man, I got so much fascinating speculation about what was happening with Killian over the course of posting this story, and things I imagined were obvious often weren’t. We’re past Chapter 15 now though, we all know what’s what, so I’m just going to lay it all out here, in a ‘this is what happened’ kind of way. Most of this is just taking the information that’s in the story and laying it end to end, but a little of it is behind-the-scenes stuff that is part of my headcanon but may not have been explicitly stated in the fic. Spoilers through Chapter 15 of This Graceful Path.

After Killian meets Emma in Chapter 2, he starts to experience some pre-curse memories bleeding through, just as Graham does. On the day of the murder, he happens to see Gold in town, leaving the pawn shop, and experiences what I can only describe as a psychotic break. The sight of Gold sends him into a kind of fugue state where his Captain Hook side kind of takes over. Just as Graham goes charging into the woods after the wolf, Killian goes charging into the woods after Gold. By which I mean when Gold gets in his car and drives off, Killian steals Sneezy’s car and follows him.

(You’ll note that he never tells Emma he can’t drive, just that he doesn’t. Because of his disability, she mistakenly assumes that he can’t. But he knows how to drive the same way other cursed residents do. Driving without some kind of steering wheel accommodation may not be ideal, but it’s far from impossible.)

Gold parks at his cabin, gets a shovel, and goes into the woods to bury the dagger. (I’m forgetting why he did this in canon, but he did - Graham ran into him in the woods alive in the show, and as I recall it was clear he was burying the dagger because he was afraid someone would take it.) Killian, trailing him at some distance, hides Sneezy’s car and follows on foot. Discovering Gold with the dagger, Killian takes it and stabs him to death. Ironically, in the land without magic, maybe Killian could have just brained Gold with the shovel and the darkness would have had nowhere to go. But he doesn’t have the presence of mind to make that decision, and thus the Dark One cycle continues.

At the moment that Gold dies, Killian becomes the Dark One -- he’s the Dark One from the end of Chapter 2 on, although the reader doesn’t see him again until Chapter 4. However, being that he’s under Regina’s curse and that there’s technically no magic in this world (except when there is -- if A&E can play fast and loose with this then so can I), the darkness manifests itself in him in subtle ways. First things first, it whispers to him what to do with the dagger. Being still in this sort of fugue state, he listens. 

Bloody dagger in hand, he goes back to the cabin, wraps the dagger in his bloody shirt, and hides it under a loose floorboard. He cleans up in the bathroom, zips his coat up to the neck, and walks home, leaving Sneezy’s car hidden where he left it. By the time he gets to his doorstep, the darkness has helped him to suppress the memory of what he’s done. Billy sees him approach the apartment, looking “normal.” Billy’s not so observant a guy that he’s gonna notice a small detail like Killian having his coat zipped all the way up. Meanwhile, Graham discovers the body and calls Emma. Had Graham been at 100% he probably could have followed the trail back to the cabin, but he wasn’t.

From this point forward, Killian is plagued by dreams of his true self -- being Captain Hook, watching Milah die, losing his hand. His cursed self has a vague memory of Milah dying and of injuring his hand critically in a sailing accident, but these dreams are different. He doesn’t understand why he’s dreaming of pirates. And he certainly doesn’t understand why he’s suddenly hallucinating clippy!Rumple.

In moments of extreme stress, more of Killian’s memories start to bleed through. When Emma interrogates him, when Regina tries to goad him into revealing himself, when Emma says “Captain Hook” out loud, these things cause him to slip back into that weird psychological place where memories of Captain Hook seem closer to the surface, and stuff comes out of his mouth from his old life that he can’t control. When he was admitted to the hospital after the car accident, he also muttered something violent and/or incriminating, which is why Archie was summoned to the hospital. However, by the time Archie arrived, Killian was back to normal, and Archie couldn’t draw any conclusions from their meeting. It would be interesting to see what would have happened if Killian had seen Archie as a patient, but before he could do so, the curse broke.

You guys were so mad at Regina, and while she is evil, she was totally right the whole time about Killian being the killer. All she wants is to find the dagger so that she has leverage over the new Dark One, so she’s understandably furious that Emma seems more interested in kissing the Dark One than arresting him.

Again, I played a little fast and loose with the Dark One’s magic in this fic. Killian isn’t fully the Dark One while still under Regina’s curse -- he can’t do magic, he’s not invulnerable to injury or death (remember, Gold had to use his cane), he can still get drunk and even sleep, albeit poorly. But I felt like it served the narrative to have little bits of Dark One-ness leak out. He scares Sidney off at an opportune moment with scary words he isn’t sure of the source of. He suddenly plays darts absurdly well. He is able to run to Henry’s aid faster than a human should be able to run. 

Meanwhile, he falls in love with Emma. He knows he’s fourteen kinds of messed up, but man, he really, really likes this girl. 

That’s probably enough about Killian for now, as anything else would get dangerously close to spoiling the last chapters. I promise I’ll post more about him at a later date.

[hauntedduckdefendor]

The Treehouse

Chapter 1

Authors Note: Mentions it child abuse

Jim Hopper and Joyce Horowitz were the definition of complete opposites.

Joyce was an outcast. She liked, photography, liked to read and kept to herself. She was smart, made good grades, was loved by her teachers, but she didn’t have many friends. Her home life was a nightmare, her parents always fighting, her father a drunk who used her and her mother as a punching bag and their family didn’t bring in a lot of money. She was considered a freak by everyone at school and called trash because of how she dressed, which she purposely chose to hide the bruises her father would leave littering her body and the fact she couldn’t afford anything nicer than second hand

Jim Hopper was the only constant in her miserable life. He was her rock, the only person who could make her smile and take away the darkness that plagued her existence. He was popular, a jock, had parents that adored him, plenty of friends and more than enough girls trying to get into his pants to satisfy any man, yet he still found time for the biggest loser at Hawkins High and she’d never understand why he stayed by her side all of these years.

He had a future and she wouldn’t allow him to ruin that because of her reputation. It was the main reason she’d always told him no. The main reason she tried to avoid him in the halls and why she asked to be seated up front in classes they shared together. Was she crazy for constantly turning away the most popular boy in school? Absolutely, but the need to protect him so he would never have to endure a moment of the shit she dealt with on a daily biases outweighed her own happiness. He couldn’t been seen in public with someone like her.

That didn’t last forever however. Throughout High school Hopper started breaking every rule Joyce had set in place for them. He got better at finding her in the halls after class and managed to discover all of her hiding places during lunch.

“Jesus Hop!” Joyce hissed through clenched teeth when he suddenly appeared at her locker one afternoon, scaring the shit out of her. “What are you doing?” She asked once her heart rate returned to normal, quickly scanning the hall to make sure they were alone.

Hopper just shook his head at her panic. “I missed you.” He pouted playfully, leaning against the locker beside hers. “And no ones around. You don’t have to pretend like I don’t exist.”

Joyce rolled her eyes. “Aren’t you supposed to be getting ready for your date with Chrissy?”

“Screw Chrissy. The only reason I’m even talking to her is because you’ve practically forced me to date every girl that isn’t you.” He said with a sigh. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to pretend you like someone when you’re in love with someone else?”

Joyce frowned and stared at the floor. Did he have any idea how hard it was for her to constantly push him away? To love him so much she’d sacrifice her own joy to make sure he didn’t become part of the torture she endured? “Please just go before someone sees you.”

“Joyce…” He pleaded, reaching out to touch her arm.

“Jim, what’s taking so long?!” Benny Hammond's voice shot through the both of them like a bullet when he entered the hallway and Hopper quickly removed his hand as he stalked toward them.

Clearing his throat, he took a step back from Joyce. “Just helping with a stuck locker.”

“Oooook…since when did you waste your time helping trash?” Benny asked with disgust, looking between the two.

“Fucking great.” Joyce mouthed to herself at the insult and grabbed her books.

“Don’t be an asshole.” Hopper knew he was crossing a line. Joyce had made it very clear she didn’t want him standing up for her at school, but right then he didn’t care. She was unaware that it literally killed him every time he had to stand by and watch others treat her like yesterday’s garbage. She didn’t deserve that. Hell, no one deserved to be treated the way she was.

“Whatever man.” Benny grabbed Hopper's sleeve and pulled. “Come on. Chrissy's waiting for you.”

Before Hopper had a chance to protest, Joyce slammed her locker shut and walked away.

“Might wanna wash that hand before you catch something.” She heard Benny say to Hopper with a laugh as the two headed in the opposite direction.

“Bastard.” Joyce mumbled to herself, clutching her books to her chest. She was pissed. Pissed at Hopper for not leaving her alone like she asked and pissed at Benny for being a dick when she’d never even spoken a word to him, but this was her life. This was the daily bullshit she'd been dealing with since middle school. Around the time her father thought she was old enough to take a beating for the first time and that’s when she started wearing baggy clothes to hide what he’d done. Started showing up to school like a zombie because she was afraid to sleep and stressing herself out to make good grades. Doing anything to keep from making her father angry.

At first Joyce didn’t mind Hopper stepping in to be her savior. It was nice to know that at least one person truly cared about her, but then she realized how much it hurt to watch kids start giving him shit for doing so. They weren’t accepting of him standing up for the freak and she wouldn't allow him to become a disappointment to his family if he gave up on his dreams worrying about her.

So a compromise was made, much to Hopper's disapproval. They would remain best friends and carry on with their friendship as long as it wasn’t at school or in public where the wrong person could catch wind of it. The situation wasn’t practical, but it worked for now.

They had known one another since they were 3 years old and the bond they developed over the years was unbreakable. No matter how many girls Joyce talked Hopper into dating, he’d never share the same feelings with them that he had for her. He loved her more than anything and was thoroughly convinced that would never change. That one day he would make her finally give in and have her all to himself, show the world she was his. And even though she tried to push him away, he knew she loved him and that it would completely break her if she lost him. She couldn’t hide behind her makeshift shield forever.

-

Hopper was nervous as he climbed the aging ladder to his and Joyce's tree house later that evening. Something the two of them had built together the summer after Hopper saw Joyce’s bruises for the first time. With the help of his father, the beautiful wooden box became Joyce's sanctuary.

It was settled in the woods that separated the Hopper farm from the dilapidated trailer Joyce sadly called home. A place no one knew existed unless they got lost and decided to drive down the abandoned looking gravel driveway that was getting extremely overgrown.

Jim’s father had suggested the location to keep it hidden and make it convenient for Joyce to use as an escape after his son told him about the abuse she received at home. He already disliked her father, having arrested him more than once for public intoxication and would have loved bringing him down to the station for child abuse had Jim not talked him out of it. The two preteens managed to convince him it was a one time deal and would never happen again, even though he knew better of it. So to not add even more stress to the poor girls life the least he could do was offer her a little bit of safety in the form of their tree house and considering the Hopper family was wealthy, it turned out better than any kid could hope for.

A fresh coat of paint wouldn’t hurt and a few boards needed to be replaced, but other than that, it showed no signs of crashing down around them and for that Hopper was grateful since his growth spurt was relentless. There was no doubt the constant weight inside had doubled from when it was originally built as they hit puberty and were turning into young adults.

When Hopper reached the hatch for the door he heard music playing and knew Joyce was still mad. That was the main reason he was showing up late to meet her here like he did every day, because he didn’t want to fight with her, but he bit his tongue and crawled through the small opening anyway to face the consequences of what happened at school.

All she offered him upon entering was a quick glance and then immediately returned her eyes back to the book she was reading.

“Hey.” He greeted, dropping the door back in place before joining her on the couch that was purposely settled by the biggest window in the tree house. Since they didn’t have electricity, this offered the most natural lighting and was undoubtedly her favorite spot in the room.

Joyce gave him a half ass wave, but never looked up from the pages.

Hopper frowned and leaned back against the arm of the couch so he was sitting sideways facing her. “I’m sorry about Benny.”

Joyce chose to ignore his apology. “How was your date?”

“Can we not talk about her?” He asked with a groan.

“Then why are you here, Hop?” She snapped. “You know I’m pissed, so if you didn’t come to talk about your day, then leave. Because you know exactly what I’m going to say when its my turn to share.”

Hopper growled to himself and ran a hand over his face. “I don’t want to fight with you, Joyce.”

“Then why do you keep making things more difficult than they have to be? Its pretty simple. Stay away from me at school.” She finally lifted her head to look at him, hoping to get her point across.

“I don’t want to stay away from you!” He yelled, getting frustrated. “I fucking love you and I hate everything about this arrangement.” His hand reached out to touch her side and she jerked away from him with a soft gasp. If he didn’t know any better he’d assume she just didn’t want him touching her, but that was an all too familiar reaction to pain. “That son of a bitch.” His frustration quickly turned to anger. “What pissed him off this time?”

Joyce watched as Hopper's grip on the back of the couch tightened so hard his knuckles turned white. Her lip finding its way between her teeth as she contemplated lying to him. “Got a B in calculus…” She settled for the truth since he’d spot her bullshit anyway.

Hopper flexed his jaw. Any parent should be over the moon if their child brought home a B, but he knew Joyce’s piece of shit father expected nothing but the best and held her to unfair standards. She was already taking college classes and was far more advanced than any other student at Hawkins High, but that wasn’t enough for the daughter he expected to get a free ride from when she landed a good job with a nice salary. “How bad is it?” Hopper finally asked once he started to calm down.

Silently she lifted her shirt to expose the nasty bruise across her ribs and closed her eyes to avoid seeing his reaction. The sadness she’d find in his features was sure to make her feel even worse about it.

“Jesus.” He whispered, reaching out to gently touch around the damaged skin. “A belt?”

Joyce swallowed and gave him a nod.

“Come here.” Without a fight, Joyce allowed him to carefully pull her into his lap where she rest her head against his shoulder and forced back the tears she could feel threatening to fall. There was no denying she was as tough as they came and very rarely allowed anyone to see her this vulnerable, but she had a breaking point and Hopper was the only person she’d ever trust to see her this way. “It’s ok”. He soothed when he felt her small body tremble against him.

Once the sun started setting and the room grew dim, Joyce sniffed and lifted her head to meet his eyes. "Thank you." Her voice came out a broken sob and the tears she'd fought so hard to hold back the past twenty minutes chose then to fall after thinking she had herself under control. "For loving me, for everything. You deserve so much better than this disaster."

Hopper didn't hesitate to cup her cheek and wipe away her tears with his thumb as he listened, his chest tightening the more upset he got watching her break. "There's nothing in this world I’ve wanted more than you. Joyce, you’re the smartest, most kind person I've ever met and ill never understand how no one else can see that. You’re too good for this world and everyone else can go to hell for all I care."

Joyce anticipated the moment Hopper leaned forward, knowing he was going to kiss her forehead like he always did and without a second thought she reached out to grab his jaw and redirected the motion to her lips instead. He tensed at first, shocked by the gesture, but quickly relaxed and kissed her back. It was slow, full of love and compassion as they poured fifteen years of feelings into one another and Hopper found himself getting extremely overwhelmed the longer his mouth moved with hers. He parted from her lips slightly to take in a shuddering breath and kissed her again real quick before resting his forehead against hers.

Something wet touched Joyce's hand and that’s when she noticed he was crying. "What’s wrong?" She asked worried, sitting back enough to meet his watery blue eyes with her own.

"Nothing." He said with a nervous laugh, reaching up to wipe his face, feeling a little embarrassed. "I just...It's a lot." He didn’t know how to explain his body finding the only outlet to the explosion of emotions he was currently feeling.

Joyce placed a hand on his knee and squeezed gently. “Was it ok?”

“That has to be the dumbest thing you’ve ever asked me.” He teased with a chuckle, pulling her back to his chest so she was resting against him like before. Then it dawned on him what she may have meant by her question. He hadn’t thought about the fact she’d never kissed someone, at least not to his knowledge. Considering her daily struggle she chose to avoid most people and he doubted she would lie to him if she had been physical in some way with someone else. “Hey, look at me.” He said gently, moving his chin from the top of her head. “It was perfect, you’re perfect.”

Joyce smiled and placed a kiss to his collar bone. She honestly had no idea what she was doing. She’d spent the last six years trying to get him to date other girls and make him stop seeing the two of them as ever being more than friends, and here she was kissing him and sending mixed signals. A part of her didn’t think it mattered since they could do whatever they wanted here, but the other part worried about what he might try once they left.

Hopper shivered a little when her lips made contact with his skin and subconsciously pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “Are you staying here tonight?”

She leaned into his touch with a nod. “Don’t see the point in going back home.”

“Lets pull out the bed then before it gets too dark.” Reluctantly he pushed her to stand and went to grab a sheet from the shelf on the opposite wall. This wasn’t a new thing for them so they made sure to keep freshly washed blankets and sheets around for nights like these.

As Joyce started removing cushions from the couch, Hopper unfolded the bed and tossed the old sheets to the floor so they could add the new ones. When they finished, Hopper toed off his shoes and unbuttoned his flannel as he watched Joyce dig through her over night bag and that’s when he saw her camera.

“Will you?” She asked, holding out her hand.

Hopper frowned and dropped his shirt, taking the camera from her. He’d been the eye behind the lens for every one of these photos and it still never settled well with him. So when she lifted her shirt, exposing the mark her father left, he quickly snapped the photo and gave her the camera back like it wasn’t a big deal.

The tree house walls were covered in hundreds of photos with the two of them, happy and smiling throughout the years. Hopper had even stolen one some time ago to keep in his wallet without her knowledge. But the little black box that was kept behind the couch was just another reminder of the nightmares that hid behind the smiles and once the Polaroid was added, he never wanted to see it again.

Joyce had her reasons for keeping them and he stopped questioning her about it years ago, but he hoped one day soon would be the last one he’d ever have to take.

“Are you technically cheating on your girlfriend by staying here with me?” Joyce jokingly asked as she pulled on a pair of shorts and removed her bra.

Stirred from his thoughts, Hopper rolled his eyes and stepped out of his jeans. “I’ve shared a bed with you for years.” In just an undershirt and boxers, he crawled across the bed where she was still standing beside it and placed a hand on her hip. “And does it really even count if I don’t like her to start with?”

Joyce smiled and pushed on his forehead. “There’s no way you don’t like her just a little. I’ve seen you practically suck her face off.”

Hopper pinched her uninjured side, making her squeal. “Only because you said people would call me a queer if I had a girlfriend and didn’t touch her.”

Joyce swatted his hand away when he tried to tickle her again. “The most popular boy in school isn’t supposed to ignore girls drooling over him unless somethings wrong.”

“But there is something wrong.” He said with a grin, dodging her swat.

“And what might that be?” She asked, linking their fingers together in an attempt to stop his tickle assault.

“I’m in love with you, not her.” He smiled, sitting up on his knees to wrap his free hand around the back of her neck and pull her into a kiss. To his surprise she didn’t push him away like he anticipated, but instead made him lay back and crawled into his lap, straddling his thighs.

Unable to hold back his excitement, he moaned and wrapped his arms around her tiny frame as she explored his mouth a little sloppy and inexperienced. This time she was more eager, less hesitate, and it didn’t take long for her to find a rhythm that made a heat stir in the pit of his stomach.

“I’m sorry if I’m bad at this.” Joyce grinned shyly when they broke apart, hiding her face against his chest.

Hopper shook his head. “You’re not, trust me.” A blush burned the tips of his ears and his fingers curled into her hip. “But, I think we should stop.” He’d purposely been keeping her at a distance so she wouldn’t feel his obvious erection and found himself holding on by a thread, it taking every bit of will power to not let things go further.

“You’re right…” With a sigh and one last nip at his lip, she moved to lay down.

Hopper growled when she bit him. “How are you a goddamn tease already?” He joked, pulling the blanket over them as she snuggled into his side, resting her head on his arm.

“I’ve read enough romance novels to know a thing or two.” She said with a wink.

Hopper smiled, running a hand down her arm. "I love you."

She intercepted him when he reached her wrist and pulled his hand into hers. "I Love you too." Those words weren't new between them, but she thought that maybe after tonight they meant a little more now than they had before.

Follow the link below to Ao3 for the rest of the story!

[cottoncandyjester]

Not the one for me

Submitted by anon

Good evening, Daiki! Oh god, I wrote this fic of Zeke, Prince and Prince's Darling in less than 3 hours. That's how much I crave the angst! I hope I manage to write Prince and Zeke's properly...

That being said, I apologise for the length of this oneshot. I hope Daiki and the you Anons enjoy this piece

-

You’ve never been in love before. 

Passing crushes? Sure. A casual, simple and silent appreciations to strangers you meet on the streets and malls? Yes, you’ve done it once or twice before but never more. 

Now that you think about, you always did view love as something... that would happen, when it happen. You never really chasing it or pining for it. 

Love is beautiful and you want to treasure it properly when one day you will be lucky enough to have. 

However, just because you’re inexperience, doesn’t it mean you’re not observant. 

Prince came into your life like a sudden whirlwind. Charming, romantic, kind - At first introduction, his sexy grin made your heart jump like never before. The way how he carried himself gave you a sense of assurance; that this man could take good care of you. In what way? Well, you don’t really know but Prince is very eager to show you. 

“I’ve never met someone like you before. I’ve never felt like this towards anyone before.” Prince murmurs after a lovely dinner date. You were waiting for your Uber to pick you up but Prince is so reluctant to let the night end. You’d probably taken up on his offer to stay at his place for night if you didn’t have work tomorrow. 

He tuck a lock of hair behind your ear and slowly caress your cheek. The both of you are blushing. “You’re it for me, baby.” 

You’ve never been in love before. Because of that, it’s so easy to be swept away by Prince. 

You heard stories, words of cautious from your friends who love and lost. Who had their hearts broken, infidelity and all the other baggages that came with love. So yes, you let yourself be carried away by Prince, but you couldn’t help but look.

Two months have passed. And during those two months, you spotted a few things that had your stomach curl unpleasantly from time to time. 

The first time Prince brought you to his home, you caught a glimpse of a crumpled brochure in the bin. A wedding brochure; suits, tuxedos and the like. Your brush it off as nothing. 

The second time you felt uncomfortable was when you saw a mockup of invitation letter underneath the couch while you were sweeping Prince’s the living room for your weekly movie dates. Wedding invitations with names. 

Prince & Zeke. 

The third time that broke your heart was when you finally meet the man that matches the name. 

“Yo, Zeke! Haven’t see you in a while, dude! Where have you been?” Prince called out cheerfully. 

Your could feel your entire being froze when you heard that name. It’s a like a trainwreck; the two of you were having a lunch date on the patio of your favourite restaurant. Prince insisted on treating you when you informed him that you recently got a promotion at work. Honestly, he was more excited about it than you were. In fact, this lunch date is just one of the things that he had planned for you. Earlier you were excited about his surprises but now? Dread is threatening to overwhelm you as you watch your boyfriend drag a stranger to your table. 

And the moment you saw pain and sadness briefling flashes in his eyes, You have an inkling on what’s going on behind the scenes. 

“This is Y/N; she’s the most amazing person in the world! I can’t believe I was lucky enough to met her!” Prince boasted, ever the proud boyfriend but at this moment, you wished the ground would just open up and swallowed you. “She’s everything that I didn’t know I was missing.” Your boyfriend beam and peck your cheek. 

Zeke murmurs the appropriate response. Congratulating his best friend (oh god, they’re best friends? What have you done - ), introducing himself to you politely but you can tell the bitter tone in his voice and firmly decline Price’s invitation to join their lunch. 

It’s becoming hard to breath but you keep your calm facade. Play the part of a perfect girlfriend. 

You decided to uncover the truth before you break things off with Prince. 

Unlocking Prince’s phone was easier than you though. He made your birthday date as his password - you recalled how often your friends complain that their lover never remembers their birthday but you’re numb. 

You hate going through his text messages like this, dead in the night while Prince is sleeping in the bedroom but you have to know. 

Before the guilt tightens around you like a noose. 

You open up his most recent flood of texts. The ones from his family that you’ve never seen before. The two talked about your family but he never once brought you over to his house to formally meet them. You didn’t thought about that much since your relationship is still new but now? Reading their scathing texts about how he drop Zeke like he was nothing to chase after a new piece of ass made you want to throw up. 

It went downhill from there as you read more and more texts from Prince’s family and friends. Including Zeke’s siblings. 

You couldn’t sleep that night. Hell, you couldn’t even return to the bedroom at all. 

You feel like an absolute piece of shit. 

You wanted love. The kind that you would proudly fought for your lover, struggle alongside them... build a future together with them. This isn’t love. How could you love Prince when he so readily broke his wedding to his own best friend and act like no big deal? How could you live with yourself knowing that you hurt someone as nice as Zeke? 

Zeke didn’t deserve this and you? You’re mind is racing on how to make yourself disappear from all this. 

Love shouldn’t hurt like this. 

-

A business relocation came by as the perfect timing. 

Your bosses wanted you to move to a company’s branch in another country due to your excellence performance at work. They even gave you a list of apartments that fit your budget. 

Everything is prepared with Prince none the wiser. 

You told him nothing of your decision to live in another country. Your friends and family only know about him from what you told them (a name, how long your relationship were and the bare minimum of information) and you’ve told everyone that you’re single again. 

The last few times that Prince brought you out for dates and parties were carefully persuaded not to be in your apartment. So he wouldn’t know that by the end of the week, the apartment would be up for rent. 

If you’re a stronger person, you’d admit to yourself that running away is a cowardly move. But this has never happen before and you just want to get away from it all. 

“Baby, are you alright?” Prince suddenly said, startling you from your mental catalogue. Passports, Visa all cleared, clothes and everything all in a luggage, a tearful goodbye from your friends and family - you were ready to start anew by tomorrow. 

The lest you could do now is give Prince a good night before leaving. But judging from his sweet, concern expression, looks like you didn’t do too good of a job. 

The two of you are on his large bed. You, tight in his arms, with a laptop in front of the two of you. You love horror movie and Prince wanted to watch the Thing tonight because he knew that it’s your all time favourite movie. 

So he was quick to pick on that you were distracted throughout the entire run time. 

He tap on the spacebar to pause the movie and you yelp when he turn over to flip you onto his chest. You couldn’t help flustered when he peppered kissed onto your chin and neck. 

“Baby? What’s wrong? You’ve been off this entire evening. Is... Is everything ok at work? Or with your friends? You know I hate seeing my baby not enjoying herself with me.” Prince softly said, genuinely worry about you. 

‘It’s you, Prince. I never wanted to be a reason someone’s happiness is ruin. You made me into one of those lover and I’m so ashamed of myself.’ Your mind whispers and yet like everything else, you hold your tongue. That’s all you’ve been doing ever since you fell in love hasn’t it? Kept silent, made plans in secret and destroyed a man’s happiness. 

You love Prince for being everything you dreamed off as a boyfriend. You hate him for hurting his best friend and made a mockery of his love for him. 

You hate yourself for falling in love with someone who possess such a fickle heart. Because once you uncovered the truth, doubt began plaguing you. If Prince could drop Zeke as easily as a used condom, what’s to say that he won’t do the same to you? 

Now every sweet words of love, every hint of concern and every moment of intimacy on the bed made your sick.  

“I’m just tired.” You reply with a small smile, hoping that it won’t turn into a grimace. 

“You need anything? Some snacks? Do you want to hang out in the living room instead?” Prince ask, his eyebrows furrow. His baby should worry about nothing when he’s around. An idea pops in his head. “Do you want me to fuck the stress out of you?” He purrs, his beautiful eyes lidded with a tinge of lust. 

God, ever since he laid his eyes on you, he’s been nothing but crazy for you. Everything little thing about you drives him mad with not just lust and love, but the overpowering need to worship and care for you. 

Lust is a constant companion for Prince. But love? Never until he met you. He truly wasn’t joking when he confessed that you’re it for him. You’re not his first - you’re his last, baby.

And he will do whatever it thinks to ensure that he’s the same for you as well. 

Prince saw how you hesitate. How you took a considerable amount of time to reply to him and it made him a bit uneasy. 

Something’s not right. 

“You’re very sweet to me, Prince. Always considerate.” You answered. 

Prince couldn’t help but puff his chest out, proudly. “Of course! It’s you baby. You’re my lover; you deserve nothing but the world.” 

‘He probably made the same promise to Zeke.’ The voice in your mind sorrowfully cuts in. ‘And look how that turned out.’ So you steeled your heart and continued, “Thanks, Prince.” You distract him with a languid kiss and Prince is more than happy to turn prolong it. You were left panting when he reluctantly let your lips go. “For everything. As first boyfriend goes, you made really happy.”

‘For a time.’

Something unholy deep within Prince’s heart snap. “First boyfriend? Wait... baby... Am I your first love?” He breathed out, eyes wide with disbelief. 

You wordlessly nod because it’s true and you wishes that it didn’t have to turned this way. 

However, what you didn’t know is that you just unleash a monster. 

“First boyfriend... As in, first in... everything?” 

Again, you nodded. Is it that bizarre? Well, compared to someone as experience as Prince, he probably finds it hard to believe that you remained single before him. 

“Oh, baby.” Prince smashes his lips against yours again, only this time with fervour. His hands roam your sides, subtly pushing your t-shirt up and your shorts down. “You have no idea how honour I am. A goddess like you? I really am the luckiest guy in the world!” 

He stare right into your eyes and you hope that Prince won’t be able to uncover your secrets. But all that is reflected in his eyes is love. 

“Let me show you just how much I love you! Oh please, please, baby...” He murmurs as he kiss your neck. 

That night, you let him do anything he wants to your body as your goodbye. As thanks for everything. 

It’s late into 4AM in the morning that you soundlessly dressed yourself and slip out of Prince’s home like a ghost. His number is blocked and deleted. 

This city has been good to you. Your career was boosted here, you met wonderful friends... you met Prince here. You have both fond and bittersweet memories at this place. Despite your failed love life, this city help you grew as a person so you couldn’t be begrudge it. 

Sitting on the bench at the bus stop, you switched off your phone and took a deep sigh. Maybe one day you’ll found someone you can trust with all your heart and someone who won’t use you to hurt others. 

“Y/N?” 

You blink in surprise and turn to the left. Your eyes are wide with surprise - it’s Zeke. Your throat feel constricted when he eyes your luggage and how warmly you dressed. 

“Y/N? Are you going somewhere?” He asks carefully and you don’t understand the wariness in him. 

“Visiting some relatives out of the city.” You easily fibbed. When did you became such a masterful liar? Love shouldn’t teach you that. 

“...Does Prince know about it?” 

“Yup. We talked about my trip a couple of days before.” 

“...And he’s not here to see you off?” 

Why on Earth is Zeke so distrustful? You’re trying to help him here!

“He’s not feeling well today. I made sure to see him at his place before coming here.” 

You saw how Zeke is visibily torn; unsure what to make of this. 

The bus finally pull up and you could sigh in relief. You didn’t expect to see Zeke here. You didn’t expect to be interrogate here. When the door’s slide open, you drag your luggage with you but Zeke is quicker. 

“Here, let me help.” He said and haul your luggage up the steps and you throw him a small, grateful smile. Perhaps in another world, the two of you would’ve been good friends. 

“Thank you.” You said, staring at Zeke who stood outside of the vehicle. You bit your lower lip. You need to say your piece. “I’m sorry, Zeke. If I knew - if Prince would’ve just told me about - ” You choked out. 

“Whoa, whoa, hey, Y/N, you’re alright?” Zeke rushed out. Startled when your eyes were wet. “Is Prince alright? Is he that sick?” What the fuck is going on? 

You refused to cry in front of Zeke. It’s not his fault. It’s yours and Prince’s. 

You shouldn’t have ever fallen in love. 

“I’m sorry, Zeke.” You repeated. “You’re a great guy. I never wanted to hurt you.” 

At that moment, realisation hit Zeke. You could see that he understand your meaning of your words and you dip your head at him just as the bus door’s slide shut. 

“Y/N! Y/N! Wait! Don’t do this!” Zeke began to frantically shout. His mind is racing. How did you found out about his relationship with Prince!? Prince. All thoughts went back to Prince. He remembered the possessiveness that Zeke never knew in Prince when he talks about you. How his world just doesn’t revolve around sex anymore. How you became the lynchpin of Prince’s entire world. 

For once, Zeke can’t predict what his best friend would do once he found out what his lover has done.

“Y/N! Please! You can’t leave Prince!” Zeke hollered. “You don’t know what you’ve done, Y/N!” 

Passerby stare at Zeke strangely but he doesn’t even notice them. As the bus began to grow tiny in the distance, Zeke let out a string of curses; at lost what to do. 

What a mess! It hurts, it hurts so much that his own best friend think nothing of his love for him. His dream wedding crumbled just because Prince couldn’t keep it in his damn pants. 

But then, the more he listen to Prince talks about his new lover, Zeke starts to detect something off. Prince don’t do ‘love’, all he knows is lust but this person? Whoever it is, it’s making Prince turn to an unhealthy extreme. Both of them don’t do love so Zeke is the last person to judge him but when he saw Prince’s new lover, the one that made him threw Zeke away, Zeke could sort of understand. 

His new lover is nothing like his exes. Y/N could easily keep up with his wild friend, yet still remain true to herself. Y/N parties with him, but doesn’t let herself be swept away with Prince’s shenanigans. During their sparse interaction, Zeke could tell that Y/N is charming and lovely in their own way. They're observant, thoughtful and always down to learn about new things. But most importantly, Y/N grounded Prince. 

Something that Zeke could never do. 

“I never knew that life could be so... worthwhile until I met Y/N.” Said a drunken Prince after their shifts at the bar ended for the day. “She makes me appreciate the little things, ya know? L-Like, it’s so weird! I don’t see other people now that I got Y/N.” A hiccup and more drunken rambling. "Like, it makes me so happy making Y/N happy! Her cute smile make my heart jump every fucking time and don't even get me started on the sex! Y/N is just... out of this world!" 

And now Y/N’s gone. Zeke curse once more, wondering if he has to be one to tell Prince that his lover - his entire world - ghosted him. 

-

Listening to Baekhyun's Bambi & Cry for love really got into my writing mood and I channel that into this fic. I'm toying with the idea of part 2 but that depends how well I can write filth and yandere goodness! 

Note: okay so I was just gonna post this as is and not comment on it but I gotta say- WHY IS IT SO GOOD! Like I was on the edge of my seat! The way you portrayed Zeke and prince’s relationship actually matches well with a draft I have sitting in my drafts of Prince just venting to Zeke about wanting more than a quick fuck it’s just- AHHHHH✨ I’m begging you please write more

[yawednesdays-blog]

The long hot summer has officially begun and our summer TBR list is on FIRE! By the beach, by the pool, by the air conditioner…we’ve good ALL the summer books.

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June 1st

Truth or Dare by Non Pratt, June 1, 2017, Walker Books, 304 pages

Love is a game with the highest risks. What are you willing to sacrifice in the name of love?

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Spellbook of the Lost and Found by Moira Fowley-Doyle, RHCP Digital

This follow-up to her 2015 debut The Accident Season promises to be just as dark and atmospheric.

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June 6th

The Sandcastle Empire by Kayla Olson, June 6, 2017, HarperTeen, 464 pages

We’ve been excited about this environmentally themed dystopian since we reported on its auspicious beginnings February 2016. A must read for 2017!

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Here Lies Daniel Tate by Cristin Terrill, Simon & Schuster, 400 pages

Daniel Tate went missing at age 10. Daniel Tate returned at age 10. But this isn’t Daniel Tate. This is a con artist. And whoever has returned to take Daniel’s place may have just walked into a bigger scam than he bargained for.

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Tash Hearts Tolstoy by Kathryn Ormsbee, June 6, 2017, Simon & Schuster, 367 pages

Natasha aka Tash is dealing with lots of exciting new changes. He web series has gone viral and she’s becoming internet famous. But with fame comes more exposure than she planned for. Can she handle the pressure? Can she handle her crush on fellow vlogger Thom? And more importantly, can he handle her asexuality? Fame, love and Russian literature collide in Tash Hearts Tolstoy.

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The Hundredth Queen (Book 1) by Emily R. King, June 1, 2017, Skyscape, 300 pages

Kalinda has long since resigned herself to a fate of living her life in solitude among the sisterhood. Kalinda is sickly and unfit to fight for a coveted spot as a royal wife. But unexpectedly that is precisely what happens. Kalinda is now fighting against 99 other wives and courtesans for the King’s attention, a spot Kalinda does not want. Can she survive and escape to the quiet life she was resigned to live? And is that still the life she wants?

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Everything All At Once by Katrina Leno, June 6, 2017, HarperCollins Children’s Books, 360 pages

Anxiety plagued Lottie finds herself doing the impossible after the death of her favorite aunt. Dares, challenges and facing your fears- Everything All At Once is a story about taking all life has to offer.

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Once and For All by Sarah Dessen, June 6, 2017, Viking Books for Young Reader, 400 pages

With a mother who’s famous wedding planner whose job it is to make The Big Day picture perfect, no matter what’s happening behind the scenes, it’s no wonder Louna is cynical about love. But when she meets handsome overly optimistic Ambrose, his perptual good mood just wan win her over.

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Perfect Ten by L. Philips, June 6, 2017, Viking Books for Young Readers, 352 pages

Sam has been trapped in a dating wasteland. But when he performs a Wiccan love spell with his bestie, he suddenly has not one, not two but THREE guys vying for his attention. But which of these magical suitors will be Sam’s Prefect Ten? Or is he setting the bar too high?

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Song of the Current by Sarah Tolcser, June 6, 2017, Bloomsbury Childrens Books, 373 pages

“From debut author Sarah Tolcser comes an immersive and romantic fantasy set along the waterways of a magical world with a headstrong heroine determined to make her mark.”- Goodreads

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The Impossible by Tara Altebrando, June 6, 2017, Bloomsbury USA Childrens, 304 pages

“Unusual and gripping, The Possible will twist the reader round and round as it hurtles towards a sensational climax. For lovers of We Were Liars, Patrick Ness and Derren Brown.”- Goodreads

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The Impossible Light by Lily Meyers, June 6, 2017, Philomel Books

This novel-in-verse tackles body images, eating disorders and relationship with poetic rhythm.

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Wildman by J.C. Geiger, June 6, 2017, Disney-Hyperion, 336 pages

Lance Hendrick knows where’s going. He’s heading to his graduation party 400 miles away, where this valedictorian will accept the well deserved praise of his peers and affection from his girlfriend, respectively. But when his car breaks down in the middle of nowhere, Lance has experiences that his “normal” self would never dream of.  Now reaching his destination seems less important than it did just a few days ago.

Sometimes it’s the detours in life that set us on the right path.

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The Evaporation of Sofi Snow by Mary Weber, June 6th, Thomas Nelson, 352 pages

In a future where Earth is run by corporations, online games for real consequences, have blackmail is just part of the job, Sofi will stop at nothing to find the brother the world believes is dead.

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Dramatically Ever After (Ever After Book 2) by Isabel Bandeira, June 6, 2017, Spencer Hill Contemporary, 378 pages

The high drama continues for Em in Ever After Book 2.

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Internet Famous by Danika Stone, June 6, 2017, Swoon Reads, 320 pages

This online fairy tale romance is threatened by a real life troll in Danika Stone’s latest novel.

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The Unliklies by Carrie Firestone, June 6, 2017, Little Brown and Company, 336 pages

“Five teens embark on a summer of vigilante good samaritanism in a novel that’s part The Breakfast Club, part The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks, and utterly captivating.”- Goodreads

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What I Lost by Alexandra Ballard, June 6, 2017, Farrar, Straus & Giroux, 400 pages

Elizabeth as lost a lot. And physical weight is just a part of it. Now she’s trying to get through the program to gain some of what she lost back.

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Romeo, Juliet & Jim by Larry Schwart & Iva-Marie Palmer, June 6, 2017, Christy Ottaviano Books/Henry Holt

“Shakespeare meets Gossip Girl in this modern-day tale of two star-crossed lovers that soon becomes a love triangle in the first book of a trilogy.”- Goodreads

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Dividing Eden (Book 1) by Joelle Charbonneau, June 6, 2017, HarperTeen, 336 pages

Carys and Andreus are brother and sister who shared the bond of twins and of second siblings. They never thought they’d know the stress of ruling Eden. But when the king and their older brother are killed, these siblings will be divided by the most important competition in the land, the Trial of Succession.

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Words in Deep Blue by Cath Crowley, June 6, 2017, Knopf Books for Young Readers, 288 pages

Imagine professing your love to a boy and never receiving a response. Now imagine it’s a year later and your working in that boy’s family book shop, surrounded by words and romance and the constant reminder of unrequited love. Welcome to Rachel’s world.

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  June 13th, 2017

Saints and Misfits by S.K. Ali, June 13th, Salaam Reads/Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers

Janna is an Arab-Indian American girl, a book lover, a photographer, a graphic novelist…She’s all of these things and working out how they fit together. But when she meets Jeremy starts to care about what people think of her in a way she never used to. Janna finds herself questioning not only herself, but what it means for others to be saints, misfits and monsters.

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Want by Cindy Pon, June 13, 2017, Simon Pulse, 336 pages

“From critically acclaimed author Cindy Pon comes an edge-of-your-seat sci-fi thriller, set in a near-future Taipei plagued by pollution, about a group of teens who risk everything to save their city.” -Goodreads

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Our Dark Duet by Victoria Schwab, June 13, 2017, Greenwillow Books, 528 pages

Last year’s This Savage Song still plays in our hearts. We can’t wait for what Victoria has in store for Our Dark Duet!

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Bad Romance by Heather Demetrios, June 13, 2017, Henry Holt and Co., 368 pages

The title of this book says it all. There are bad boys, but worse is a Bad Romance.

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The Fallen Kingdom (The Falconer Trilogy Book 3) by Elizabeth May, June 13, 2017, Chronicle Books, 336 pages

“The long-awaited final book in the Falconer trilogy is an imaginative tour-de-force that will thrill fans of the series.” -Goodreads

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Thief’s Cunning by Sarah Ahiers, June 13, 2017, HarperTeen, 416 pages

“The companion novel to Assassin’s Heart—an action-packed fantasy that Printz Award winner Laura Ruby said “will keep you turning the pages all night long”—Thief’s Cunning picks up eighteen years later and follows Allegra Saldana as she uncovers the secrets about the line of killers she descends from.”- Goodreads

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Down Among the Sticks and Bones (Wayward Children #2) by Seanan McGuire, June 13, 2017, Tor.com, 176 pages

“Twin sisters Jack and Jill were seventeen when they found their way home and were packed off to Eleanor West’s Home for Wayward Children.

This is the story of what happened first…”- Goodreads

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Obsidian And Stars by Julie Eshbaugh, June 13, 2017, Harper Teen, 368 pages

In the sequel to Ivory and Bone—the prehistoric fantasy novel that New York Times bestselling author Amie Kaufman described as a “richly crafted world of life-and-death stakes”—the story shifts to Mya’s viewpoint as vengeful adversaries force her to flee the life she once knew.

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Roar (Stormheart #1) by Cora Carmack, June 13, 2017, Tor Teen, 384 pages

“In a land ruled and shaped by violent magical storms, power lies with those who control them.” -Goodreads

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Be True To Me by Adele Griffin, June 13, 2017, Algonquin Young Readers, 352 pages

It’s summer 1976, Fire Island. Jean is falling for Gil, the new boy with a secret past. But she’ll have to challenge her tennis rival Fritz for the top spot and Gil’s affection.

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The Suffering Tree by Elle Cosimano, June 13, 2017, Disney-Hyperion, 368 pages

An inherited mansion, a new town, a boy clawing himself out of the grave….moving to a new town is never easy.

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Solider Boy by Keely Hutton, June 13, 2017, Farra, Straus & Giroux, 336 pages

“Soldier Boy begins with the story of Ricky Richard Anywar, abducted at age fourteen in 1989 to fight with Joseph Kony’s rebel army in Uganda’s decades-long civil war. Ricky is trained, armed, and forced to fight government soldiers alongside his brutal kidnappers, but never stops dreaming of escape.” -Goodreads

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Midnight at the Electric by Jodi Lynn Anderson, June 13, 2017, HarperTeen, 272 pages

Kansas, 2065. Oklahoma 1934. London 1919. Midnight at the Electric weave three stories together for miles and generations.

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June 20th, 2017

Maybe in Paris by Rebecca Christiansen, June 20, 2017, Sky Pony Press

Keira wants to show her brother Levi the time of  his life in Paris. But Levi is autistic and has just spent months in psych ward after a suicide attempt. Keira wants to believe Levi’s problems are behind him, but the deeper they get into their adventure, the more apparent Levi’s problems are. When Levi disappears from their hotel while Keira is out with a cute Scottish bassist, it might be too late for her to admit Levi needs more help than she can provide.

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Two Roads From Here by Teddy Steinkellner, June 20, 2017, Simon and Schuster, 448 pages

“Five high school seniors. Two different roads. One life-changing decision. For fans of Tommy Wallach and Patrick Ness comes a thoughtful, funny novel that explores what happens to five teens when they choose the road…and the road not taken.”- Goodreads

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June 27th, 2017

Now I Rise (The Conqueror’s Saga #2) by Kiersten White, June 27th, Delacorte Press, 496 pages

The highly anticipated sequel to As I Darken (The Conqueror’s Sage #1), a story of Vlad the Impaler as a woman.

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Midnight Jewel (The Glittering Court #3) by Richelle Mead, June 27, 2017, Razorbill

We’re back at the Glittering Court, but this time we see things through the prism of Mirabel’s eyes.

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Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee, June 27, 2017, Katherine Tegen Books, 528 pages

“An unforgettable tale of two friends on their Grand Tour of 18th-century Europe who stumble upon a magical artifact that leads them from Paris to Venice in a dangerous manhunt, fighting pirates, highwaymen, and their feelings for each other along the way.”- Goodreads

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Girl on the Verge by Pintip Dunn, June 27, 2017, Kensington, 256 pages

“From the author of The Darkest Lie comes a compelling, provocative story for fans of I Was Here and Vanishing Girls, about a high school senior straddling two worlds, unsure how she fits in either—and the journey of self-discovery that leads her to surprising truths.”- Goodreads

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If Birds Fly Back by Carlie Sorosiak, June 27, 2017, HarperTeen, 448 pages

“With humor and heart, debut author Carlie Sorosiak weaves a story of finding people who leave and loving those who stay, perfect for fans of Jandy Nelson and Emery Lord.”- Goodreads

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Aftercare Instructions by Bonnie Pipkin, June 27, 2017, Flatiron Books, 265 pages

“In the tradition of Jandy Nelson and Rainbow Rowell, a big-hearted journey of furious friendship, crazy love, and unexpected hope after a teen’s decision to end an unwanted pregnancy.”- Goodreads

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The Impossible Vastness of US by Samantha Young, June 27, 2017, Harlequin Teen, 384 pages

India is in a new town, with a new step-sister and a new social status- or lack thereof to be exact. As India spends more time with her new sister Eloise and her boyfriend Finn in their rich new community, she learns that things are not always as they appear.

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You could read a book a day and still not get through all the June releases. Hopefully these this will be enough to keep you out of trouble this summer. If not, stay cool, we’ll be back next month with more One To Watch Books!

Ann-Eliza

Have you added our May One To Watch Books to your TBR?

One To Watch Books: Your Guide to June YA Releases The long hot summer has officially begun and our summer TBR list is on FIRE! By the beach, by the pool, by the air conditioner...we've good ALL the summer books.