#ping x jan

[kaaandinaa]

Just want to say…

a throuple wouldn’t have been so bad

[gold-onthe-inside]

new year's resolution

who? spencer reid (s8) x blake!reader summary: the end of the year brings your life in perspective, the trajectory of your life inverse to the champagne you drink. the morning after, spencer brings you around to the idea that when one door closes, another opens. word count: 4k (i got carried away) content warnings: drinking, broken engagement, implied relationship with maeve (alternate ending where she doesn't die), r's ex-fiance cheating on her, kissing but no sex, r's mom implied to have passed away a/n: wrote this in like a day and a half to get it ready for the first of jan. set before wrong person... and smells like infidelity, but can be read as a standalone. only context needed is that reader is blake's goddaughter and was set up with spencer. god knows when i'll get around to writing that fic. enjoy and have a happy new year xx

You had been good the last couple months, trying to rebuild your life in D.C., but with the year coming to an end, you can't help the pang of disappointment. This wasn't where you were supposed to be, a year into your 30s. You were supposed to be engaged, your phone pinging with scheduled appointments with florists and hair and makeup artists and bridal stores. Instead, you had been sipping champagne at your godmother's colleague's New Year's Eve party, trying to avoid a certain tall brunet who had the ability to read you all too well.

You've lost track of how many drinks you've had, as well as your godmother, all you know is that someone holds your hair back as you puke and rubs your back in a way that painfully reminds you of your mom and brings pinpricks of tears on your eyes. The last thing you remember is nodding when he asks if he can take you home.

And so, you start the new year in a bed that's not your own, wearing clothes that are not your size at all, sprawled in a queen sized bed, alone. Well done, really, you thought, rubbing your face and rolling over to check the time with a yawn. You can hear the water from the shower running, and you hope you can just grab your clothes and make a run for home before he steps out - but Spencer's nothing if not efficient with his water usage.

He stepped out, in a gray t-shirt and plaid sweatpants, the ends of his hair dampening the top of his shirt, and stood in the doorway as you fumbled with your boots, still wearing one of his shirts so you wouldn't have to wear the shimmery black top you had been wearing last night. "You're awake," he said, putting his towel away, not moving from the door.

Your hands stilled and your eyes shut as you cringed at being caught. You're so bad at this, you thought to yourself. Spencer pushed himself off the doorway, and walked further into the bedroom. "Where are you going?"

"Home," you say, pulling up the zipper on your boot and standing up, steadily, and he moved instinctively to brace you so you wouldn't fall, hands on your arms, his touch warm and leaving you with a different kind of buzz from last night, and you pulled away. No attachments, you reminded yourself in your head. "Look, I-I'm sorry," you started, "Whatever happened last night--"

"What happened last night was that you were too drunk to go home alone, I brought you here, let you change and sleep, and I took the couch," Spencer said, keeping his voice neutral and watching your expression change.

"Oh." You're not entirely sure why you're disappointed at that news. "Uh, okay, then- then I'll just-"  You went to move past him, aiming for the door, but he grabbed your arm before you could get very far.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa." He said, his hand gently guiding you to sit back on the bed. "You're in no condition to walk home, your head must be spinning."

"I can't stay here," you murmured, your head starting to hurt at the excessive movements.

Spencer's hands were on your shoulders now, keeping you sitting down on the edge of the bed. "You're not going anywhere until you've at least drank some water and eaten something. Your blood sugar and your blood alcohol level are both probably pretty low right now."

You wanted to protest, you wanted to get out of here, starting to feel like a kidnapped baby deer, unable to walk, dependent on Spencer.

Spencer gave your shoulders a little squeeze, silently commanding you to stay put. "I'll go get you some water and pain killers. Stay here, alright?"

"Not like I have much of a choice in that," you murmured under your breath.

The corner of Spencer's mouth lifted in a hint of a smile. He walked out of the room, and a few minutes later, returned with an unopened bottle of water, two aspirin, and a package of saltines. "Here." He said, passing you the pills and then opening the bottle of water for you before grabbing the crackers and pushing both of them in your hands. "Take the pills, and eat some of those, you'll feel better."

You followed his orders, unable to help wondering if this was what life with Spencer would look like - museum and coffee dates, nagging you to drink more water, making sure you take your medication on time, doctor's appointments and grocery shopping together - and suddenly you're crying, holding the stupid crackers in your hand, fat tears welling up as your chest tightens, thinking about the life you should have had.

Spencer's head tilted, his eyes widening as you started to cry. His arms reached out to you, his hands tentative. He wasn't exactly sure what to do. "Hey...hey, hey, hey," he cooed, pulling you into his arms. "Why are you crying?" He pulled you into his lap, his hand rubbing your back. His touch was gentle, and he said nothing, just let you cry into his chest. This wasn't how the New Year was supposed to go, but you miss your mom, and your ex-fiance, even after everything, and you feel like such a complete mess.

Spencer's fingers gently carded through your hair, as his free hand continued to rub your back. He whispered soothing sounds into your ear, and rocked you back and forth gently. He didn't mind that your tears were starting to soak his t-shirt, he just held you tighter and let you sob. It was awful and embarrassing and you have to get out of here.

Spencer could sense the change in you. Your breathing became more shallow, your muscles tensed up under his hands. He pulled away to look at you but kept one arm around you. "What's going on?" He asked, his voice soft, and his eyes searching your face. "Why are you trying to leave so badly?"

"I can't be here," you managed, extracting yourself from his arms. "You're nice and I'm a mess and I just..."

"Hey, hey," he said, his hand darting out to grab yours as you tried to stand. He tugged your hand, hard enough to cause you to stumble and fall back on the bed right next to him. He moved so he was sitting facing you. "You're allowed to be a mess," he said, his voice firm but gentle. "Everybody is allowed to be a mess sometimes."

"You shouldn't have to deal with this," you murmured.

"Who said I have to?" He asked, his eyes meeting yours, his hand still gripping yours. "Who said I don't want to deal with it?"

"Are you insane?" you ask, the question slipping out of your mouth before you could think. "Why on earth would you want to deal with my crap?"

Spencer chuckled, his free hand coming up to brush some hair out of your face. His eyes were sparkling, but the look on his face was serious. "I think the real question is why wouldn't I?" He said, his thumb rubbing against the back of your hand.

"Because we met like a month ago on a date neither of us wanted to be on," you said.

"Yeah, but... we had a good time." He said, a crooked smile on his face. "And besides, you're a smart, attractive woman. I think you're worth dealing with a little crap every now and then."

"Trust me, nothing about this is little," you said with a groan, the tears making your headache worse.

Spencer's eyes studied your face, his hand came up to gently thumb away a tear that was slowly rolling down your face. "How about this, we deal with the crap one step at a time. Step one: let yourself be helped," he said. "Stay here, sleep off the rest of your hangover, and let me take care of you a little bit. Okay?"

"I can't ask you to do that," you said weakly.

"Why not?" He said, his hand still on your face. "You need help. I'm offering to help. Why do you have such a hard time letting yourself accept help when it's offered?"

"Because... You might expect something to come out of it," you said. Or I might.

Spencer's brows furrowed together as he heard what you said. "Is that... is that why you're so hell bent on leaving? You think I'm gonna, what - expect something in return if I help you or let you vent to me?"

You swallowed. "I told you when we first went out that... I only did it to get Alex off my back, and I wasn't ready to jump into something."

He nodded slowly, his thumb coming up to brush another tear from your cheek. "I know," he said slowly. "And I agreed, I wasn't looking for anything serious. But... are you worried that I'm going to start demanding something serious?"

"Not demanding, that makes you sound awful," you murmured, because he was anything other than awful.

He nodded, a small smile playing at his lips. "So you're worried that I'm expecting a relationship," he said. "Or that I'm not going to be able to keep myself from wanting a relationship. Is that it?"

You nodded slowly, looking at him, gauging his reaction. Spencer's smile was bigger now, his fingers tilting your head up so you had to make eye contact with him. The look in his eyes was gentle, but there was something else there, too. Something wanting. "And if I told you that... I do want a relationship? What would you say to that?"

"That I'm not ready for it," you said softly. "Even if I wanted to, I just... can't."

"What if I said I was willing to wait then?" he said, his hand brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. "What if I told you that I would wait as long as you need to be ready for it?"

"It's unfair to you," you whispered.

His hand was on your face again, thumb tracing soft patterns on your cheek. "Yeah," he admitted, quietly. "It kind of is. But I still want to do it. I want to wait for you. I want to take care of you. If you'll let me."

"Spencer..." you said softly, just to say his name more than anything else.

His eyes darkened for a moment, hearing you say his name making something warm spread through his chest. His other hand moved to brush a loose strand of hair from your eyes. "Just..." he swallowed, his voice suddenly hoarse. "Please say you'll let me take care of you."

"I can't do that to you, please," you said, tears welling up again.

His hand gripped your chin, and his eyes were earnest, desperate even. "Why not?" He asked, sounding more frustrated than he looked. "Why won't you let me take care of you? Is it because of your ex?"

You swallowed, nodding thickly.

A muscle in his jaw ticked and he inhaled deeply through his nose. "I'm not him," he said, his voice low and intense, the look in his eyes almost fierce with determination. "I would never do to you what he did to you. I would never lie or cheat or just... just leave you like he did."

"I know," you said softly.

His thumb moved over your bottom lip, a touch so soft it almost felt like a whisper. "Then why is it so hard for you to believe that I'll wait as long as it takes for you to be ready?"

"Trust me, I believe it," you murmured. "That's the problem."

"What, you think I can't handle waiting for you?" he said. His hand still holding your chin, he tugged you a little closer so there was barely any space between your bodies.

You shook your head. "I think I'm going to give in before I'm ready," you murmured, desperately wanting to kiss him.

His breath fanned over your face, leaving you feeling almost lightheaded. "Would that be such a bad thing?" he asked, his voice low and quiet.

"I don't want this to be a mistake," you whisper, ghosting his lips.

His hands found your hips, pulling you even closer, your bodies now flush against each other. A strangled sound escaped from his throat as your breath hit his lips, his eyes still closed. "It won't be," he promised.

You knew in that moment that it had to be you, that he would never initiate anything until you did, that he really would wait, and you didn't want to wait anymore. Your lips settled on his, closing the miniscule gap between the two of you, his lips as soft as you'd imagined.

He inhaled sharply, but leaned forward to press his lips firmly against yours. One of his hands moved to bury in your hair, the other gripped your hip, holding you tightly against his chest. His tongue licked at the crease between your lips, as if asking for permission, for entry.

"Morning breath," you murmured in protest, parting your lips anyway.

He chuckled lowly against your lips, his tongue gently sweeping into your mouth as he pressed you back on the bed. "Like I care."

It had been so long since you had been wanted like this, so wholly, so unequivocally, his hand splayed along your side, under the shirt he had let you borrow. A shiver went down your spine as his hand moved under the shirt you were wearing. He made a soft, guttural sound as his hand met bare skin, his lips moving to your jaw. "Can't believe you were trying to leave me," he mumbled, his words almost lost against your skin.

"You make it impossible," you murmured, hand sliding along his neck.

He chuckled, his lips moving over your jaw, pausing periodically to press kisses into your skin. The hand that was under your shirt moved up higher, running along the side of your chest, and he hummed into your skin. "I'm serious," he said, his hands and lips still roaming over your neck. "If you ever think about trying to leave again, just... remember this. Remember me."

"I couldn't forget you if I tried," you murmured, nudging him back up to kiss him. He complied instantly, his tongue sliding along your lower lip as he captured your mouth again. He leaned further onto you, his body pressing you down into the mattress, his hands continuing their journey over your skin.

His hands slid further up your sides, his touch feather-light and yet leaving a burning trail in its wake. He groaned softly against your mouth, the sound sending a shiver tumbling down your spine. If there had been a line, Spencer had erased it completely with each trace of his touch. As scary as it felt, you'd let him do whatever he wanted to you.

He was desperate for you, the need and want for you making itself blatantly obvious, his body pressed taut to yours, his kiss deep and intense. His hands found your hips, gripping them and pulling you against him. He pulled away from your lips so he could gasp for air, resting his forehead against yours.

You swallowed, trying to catch your breath. "How are you so good at this and still single?" you can't help but ask.

His breath huffed hot against your face as he laughed, a small, crooked smile gracing his features. "I could ask you the same thing," he said. One of his hands moved to brush your hair from your face, and you watched as his gaze roamed over your features, like he was trying to memorize every single detail.

You bit your lower lip, looking at him, your affection unhidden. "Seriously, Spence," you said. "You never told me what happened with your ex."

His hand stilled for a moment, and he looked away from you for a second, breaking the eye contact. The air changed slightly, the atmosphere tensing a little. He was silent for a few moments, and you could see him sorting out his thoughts before he spoke.

"It..." he exhaled slowly before looking back at you again. "It ended badly," he said, quietly. "She um... She was being stalked," he said slowly as you sat up, listening. "And that was sort of how we met. And we... we started seeing each other after but... I found out she had been engaged to someone else all along."

You couldn't help the sharp intake of breath you took. Even having been through a bad relationship yourself, that seemed shockingly cruel. You laid your hand gently on Spencer's shoulder, silently encouraging him to keep going. He inhaled deeply, his eyes meeting yours, looking at you like he was trying to decipher if he could keep going. Your eyes were wide and earnest as you regarded him, your hand still on his shoulder, and he swallowed hard.

"I really liked her," he said, finally, still speaking quietly. "Maybe even loved her. She... she was my first everything."

"That's awful," you murmured.

He nodded, swallowing thickly as he continued. "Yeah," he said. "I found out that she was engaged and everything just... came tumbling down after that. I had already fallen hard for her, and it just hurt so much. I..." he trailed off, his eyes dropping, not meeting your gaze. "I'm not sure what hurt more, the fact that she was engaged, or the fact that she didn't even care about me like I did her."

"Christ," you breathed out loud, wishing you knew what to say to comfort him.

He swallowed again, looking down at his hands. "It's fine," he said after a moment. "I'm over it now. It took me a while, but I'm good now." He still wasn't looking at you, and you could see him clenching his jaw, like he was trying to force himself not to show any emotions.

You took his hands. "Well, for what it's worth, my ex-fiance cheated on me at our engagement party, so... that is definitely over."

He looked up, his eyes widening at your words. He'd known your fiance had cheated, but not like this. His hands tightened around your own instantly, his thumbs brushing softly over the back of your hands. "He... what?" he asked, shocked.

"Yeah," you said softly, tracing the ridge of his hand, fixed on it to ground yourself. "Four years flushed down the drain just like that."

His expression turned to one of sympathy, his eyes suddenly so soft and gentle. He gently pulled your hands into his lap, turning them so he could interlace his fingers through your own. "I can't even imagine how that must have felt," he said quietly. "Four years... that's a long time."

"I know. An entire presidential term," you said dryly.

His lips quirked into a half-smile, a small huff of laughter escaping him as he looked down at your hands, still gripped tightly in his own. He was silent for a moment, before looking back up at you. "What did you do? After he did that, I mean," he asked, quietly.

You let out a breath. "I um... I just left. Alex said I could stay with her, so I moved to DC."

He nodded slowly, letting out a breath of his own. He squeezed your hands in his own, his brow furrowing slightly. "Does he..." his voice trailed off for a moment, like he was unsure whether or not to continue the question. "Does he try to contact you? Or anything like that?"

You shook your head. "Not since Alex said she'd find a way to bury him six feet deep if he did."

Spencer's mouth twitched into a small half-smile at the image that conjures in his head. "Good," he said firmly. "As she should." He was quiet for a minute, his fingers tracing over your knuckles as he stared down at your hands.

You leaned your head on his shoulder, the pounding in your head fading away as you curled into him. He felt a small wave of relief wash over him as you leaned on his shoulder, his arm lifting to rest around you as he pulled you a little closer. He pressed his nose to the top of your head, inhaling deeply.

You raised his hand to your lips, kissing his knuckles, lingering. He swallowed hard, his other hand moving to gently rest on your bare knee. His eyes fluttered shut for a moment as you pressed your lips to his knuckles, the soft contact sending sparks across his skin. He was silent for several moments, his breath coming in soft huffs that you could feel against your hair.

"So what do we do now?" you asked softly.

He was quiet, contemplative, his chin moving to rest on your head. He pulled you against him so you were tucked into his side, his hand tracing slow patterns over your knee.

"You're not leaving, right?" he asked, suddenly. His voice was low but there was a slight edge to it, as if he worried that you still weren't going to stick around.

"I think you've made it clear that you don't want me to," you said.

He hummed in conformation, a small, crooked smile appearing on his face. "I don't want you to," he echoed back to you.

His hand moved from your knee to your hip, squeezing gently before he continued. "I need you to say that you're staying. Out loud."

"I'm staying," you murmured.

He exhaled as your words met his ears. The tension that was still in his body slowly leached out as he listened to your voice, the hand on your hip tightening as he heard confirmation that you were staying with him.

"Good," he said quietly, his breath coming out in a soft huff. "That's very good."

"But I have a condition," you added.

His expression was one of concern as he looked down at you for a moment, one eyebrow raised in slight surprise.

"What condition?" he asked.

"Breakfast."

He huffed out a small laugh at that one, his shoulders relaxing once again. "Breakfast?"

He was smiling slightly now, looking down at you with a look of amusement in his eyes.

"What? It's almost 9:30, I need to eat at some point."

"No, no, I'm not disputing it." he told you, his hand moving from your hip to brush the hair from your face again. "Breakfast is good. I'm just surprised that that's your only condition."

"Believe it or not, I'm not that demanding," you said.

"A shock, but one I've now learned," he teased. He was still smiling, his hand still brushing your hair away from your face. "Anything more specific that you'd like for breakfast?" he asked, the amused tint to his voice still present.

"Depends. What's in your repertoire?"

He was silent for a moment as he considered this. He looked thoughtful, and you could almost see him sifting through memories of various breakfasts he had made.

"I can do eggs," he said. "Fried, scrambled, or omelet. And bacon. And toast. And pancakes. And waffles."

"Waffles," you said immediately.

He chuckled slightly at the eagerness in your voice, his smile growing. "Waffles," he repeated. "Okay. You got it." His hands left you so he could stand, stretching his long limbs as he did so. "You should probably go shower while I make breakfast," he said, as he turned to look you sprawled on the bed again.

You nodded, rifling through your hair. He took the opportunity to look at you, just taking the time to appreciate the fact that you were actually here in front of him, in his apartment, in his clothes. His eyes roved over your form, and one corner of his mouth quirked up in a smile.

"You should probably stop staring," you told him as you sat up.

He blinked as he shook himself from his thoughts, a small pink tinge appearing on his cheeks.

"Right. Yeah, um..." he said, looking away for a moment. He cleared his throat as he turned and started out of the room. "I'll, um... just go make breakfast then," he mumbled.

You watched him go, a small smile of your own on your face, starting to feel a lot more resolved than you had felt in the last few months. New year, new start, you think to yourself, stealing one of his fluffy towels for yourself.

[transterrorweek]

Trans Terror Week 2024

We’re back! Trans Terror Week 2024 will run November 24-30th.

Between Twitter dying and busy mods (@solomontoaster and @manicpixiedreamjop once again), we are not going to have much of a presence on Twitter this year, though we will be keeping tabs on it. Your best chance at getting a quick response will be one Tumblr!

The rules are the same a last year, detailed on our FAQ page (for the mobile accessible FAQ go here). 

Rules and Reminders:

This event is for anyone who is trans, nonbinary or is currently questioning their gender. Our goal is to uplift trans content creators in the Terror fandom and we encourage cis creators to show their support for their trans compatriots.

There is NO restriction on type of content: art, fics, edits, playlists, videos, everything is welcome!

November 24th is also for Creator Spotlights, make a post highlighting your works and we’ll give you a boost!

Please tag your works #transterrorweek/#transterrorweek2024 and/or ping us @transterrorweek to make sure we see your stuff! This applies to both Tumblr and Twitter.

Fics can also be added to the Ao3 collection. Simply search for “Trans Terror Week” when posting your fic or follow the link on our blog. Our FAQ has instructions for posting anonymously.

Prompts:

This years prompts are the result of three semesters of grad school study and research on the part of one of the mods. As always, full details on the prompts can be found on our prompts page:

Day 1: Staged Otherness | Trans Performers - Fanny & Stella

Fanny & Stella cross dressed both onstage and in their personal lives during the 19th century.

Day 2: Kabloona |Trans Explorers - Jan Morris

Jan Morris was the first* trans person to ascend Mount Everest as a journalist accompanying the 1953 British Mount Everest Expedition. *as far as I know

Day 3: "Herodotus and Oral History" | Trans Historians - Leslie Feinberg

Leslie Feinberg is the author of the pioneering trans history text Transgender Warriors.

Day 4: "Identification of a Senior Officer" | Trans Military Officers - Chevalière d'Éon

Charlotte d'Éon de Beaumont, the Chevalière d'Éon, was recognized as a woman by King Louis XVI, who furnished her with a new wardrobe.

Day 5: "Learning About Sea Ice" | Trans Scientists - Alan L. Hart

Alan L. Hart pioneered the use of x-ray photography for tuberculosis diagnosis.

Day 6: Arctic Circles and Imperial Knowledge | Trans Titlebearers - Sir Ewan Forbes

Sir Ewan Forbes of Craigievar was the 11th Baronet of his family’s barony from 1968 until his death in 1991.

Day 7: "You Do Not Belong Here" | Trans Activists - Loren Cameron

Loren Cameron was a trans activist and photographer, known for photographing nude trans bodies.

[cheesysoup-arlo]

hanging out takes an interesting turn (Janis x fem!reader)

Smut- read at your own risk

(There is also some fluff but mostly smut lol)

It’s spring break and (Y/N) is bored out of her mind. *ping* suddenly someone texts (Y/N). She sees that it’s from Janis. Smiles even before reading.

J💕: hey wanna come over and watch movies?

(Y/N): yeah

(Y/N): when should I head over?

J💕: I’m setting up rn so maybe in like 30?

(Y/N): ok see you soon

Without waiting for a response (Y/N) rushes to get ready. She wants to look nice but not overdressed. She decides to wear her favorite pants and her sweater Janis said looked cute on her. (Y/N) smiles and blushes looking back on that interaction. Snapping out of her daydream to check her phone. She has about 10 minutes before she has to leave. Putting on some very light makeup (a little blush, mascara and cherry lipgloss). Packing a small bag with a couple snacks. “Bye mom I’m going to my friend’s house” (Y/N) says as she walks out the door. Taking the short drive to Janis’ house and parking. (Y/N) goes to the door and is gonna knock but gets nervous and texts Janis instead.

(Y/N): hey Jan I’m outside

J💕: ok I’ll be there in just a sec

~~~~

Janis is setting up the projector in her garage when she gets a text.

(Y/N)🥰: hey Jan I’m outside

Janis smiles at her phone and texts back while making sure everything looks good.

Janis🖤: ok I’ll be there in just a sec

She opens the door to see (Y/N) looking pretty and hot- wait…did Janis just think (Y/N) looks hot? That’s new…

~~~~

(Y/N) sees Janis. Hair a little messy, wearing some black cargo pants with a couple of paint stains, and a band tee with the neck cut off making the shirt fall off her shoulder exposing Janis’s bra strap. (Y/N)’s eyes linger for a little longer than usual. Janis looked amazing, hot? Yeah hot. “Um I set everything up in the garage, follow me” Janis says holding the door open for (Y/N). (Y/N) just smiles following Janis in. Is it suddenly a little hotter? Or was (Y/N) maybe just…no her and Janis were just friends and…(Y/N)’s eyes wonder to Janis’ ass WOAH WHY WAS SHE LOOKING THERE! Her and Janis are just friends right? Pulling (Y/N) out of her thoughts Janis says “ta da” showing off her hard work to (Y/N). “Woah this is amazing, did you do all of this just for me?” (Y/N) asks jokingly. “Um yeah actually…” Janis says blushing a little. Wait Janis is blushing? (Y/N) smirks a little. “So what movie should we watch beautiful? (Y/N) asks trying to be flirty. Janis is now blushing a lot. “Um uh whatever you want to watch” Janis says trying to hide her blush while logging into her computer. They put on a movie, snuggling close, REALLY CLOSE. (Y/N) lays on Janis’ exposed shoulder, absentmindedly drawing patterns on Janis’ thigh. Janis is no longer focused on the movie. Her breath catching in her throat. “Um (Y/N)?” Janis says feeling a little brave. “Yes, beautiful?” (Y/N) says making eye contact with Janis. Janis looks at (Y/N)’s eyes then lips then back to her eyes. “Oh?” (Y/N) says blushing. “C-can I kiss you?” Janis says hesitantly. “Yes please” (Y/N) says, starting to lean in. Janis leans in connecting their lips. The kiss is soft but passionate. They both pull away for air. “Woah” Janis says blushing. “Can we um do that again” (Y/N) asks shyly. “Oh absolutely” Janis says pulling (Y/N) in for a slightly rougher, needier kiss. (Y/N)’s body reacts before her brain and she lets out a small moan. Blushing and pulling away when she realizes what she did. “Oh you like that don’t you baby?” Janis says. The pet name sends an electrifying sensation through out (Y/N)’s body and a tingling sensation in there core. “Call me that again” (Y/N) says sounding needy. “Can I kiss you again baby?” Janis says smirking. (Y/N) pulls Janis in for a needy kiss completely forgetting about the movie. The needy kids turns into a full blown make out session. They both start getting a little handsy. Janis pauses “are you sure you want this baby? We don’t have to do more if you don’t want to?” (Y/N) rolls her eyes and lets out a small chuckle. “I want this, I really want this, I want you Janis.” Janis blushes and kisses (Y/N)’s lips, then her neck, slipping her hands under (Y/N)’s sweater. “Hmm can we take this off I wanna see your beautiful body baby” Janis says. (Y/N) very quickly takes off her sweater. “Ooo that needy are you?” Janis jokes. “shut up and kiss me pretty girl” (Y/N) says wrapping her arms around the back of Janis’ head to bring her closer. “Mmm” Janis hums pulling (Y/N) on to her lap. Once again pulling away for air, (Y/N) tugs at Janis’ shirt, “can you please take this off, I wanna kiss you all over” Janis very quickly takes off her shirt and (Y/N) slowly pushes her down so she’s laying on her back with (Y/N) straddling her. (Y/N) slow kisses Janis neck, earning a moan from Janis. Kissing further down till she reaches the waist band of Janis’ pants, “May I?” (Y/N) asks, Janis nods shyly. “No sweetheart I need words” (Y/N) says hands on Janis’ thighs waiting for verbal confirmation. “please mmm please just fuck me” Janis whimpered desperately. (Y/N) moaned, taking off Janis’ pants, see in the wet spot forming on her underwear. Seeing this made (Y/N)’s walls clench around nothing. “Mm look at you” (Y/N) hummed. Janis sat up “let’s get your pants off too” taking off (Y/N)’ pants, they both admired each other’s naked bodies for a second. (Y/N) brought Janis in for a passionate kiss causing them both to moan in sync. (Y/N) looked at Janis, pupils blown with lust, unable to form words letting out a needy moan.

Janis’ hand found it’s way to (Y/N)’s clothed clit, slowly circling it with her thumb. (Y/N)’s hips bucked desperately needing more. “Needy needy girl” Janis said kissing the girl squirming underneath her. Slowly pulling off (Y/N)’s underwear not breaking eye contact. Playing with her folds to collect some of (Y/N)’s wetness then inserting a finger into her tight hole. (Y/N) moaned loudly, it felt amazing. “You think you can handle two fingers princess?” Janis questioned. “Mmm fuck yeah” (Y/N) mumbled. Janis started steadily pumping two fingers in and out of (Y/N) while also circling her clit. The stimulation was about to send (Y/N) over the edge “J-Janis mmm I’m gonna uuuuuhhh-“ (Y/N)’s walls clenching “cum princess, cum for me” Janis said sweetly. (Y/N) came hard a brain fogging orgasm. “Mmm J…can I return the favor now” (Y/N) asked drawing circles on Janis’ thigh, causing Janis’ breath to hitch in her throat “mmm yeah princess what do you wanna do to me” (Y/N) slowly kissed down Janis’ body, “you know I’m feeling a little hungry” (Y/N) said with a smirk, licking a long slow gentle lick between Janis’ folds sending shivers down the girl’s back “oh fuck please yes” Janis mumbles over come by pleasure. As (Y/N) ate out Janis she started to pull (Y/N)’s head closer needing more contact. “(Y/N) mmm you’re so uuuuhhhh mmm I’m gonna cummm” Janis moaned loudly. “Cum for me sweetheart cum all over my face” (Y/N)’s words sent vibrations through Janis’ core making her see stars and cum hard and fast. (Y/N) licked up all of Janis’ juices then pulling her into a kiss so she could taste herself. Janis moaned into the kiss. “That was amazing, mind blowing, you’re really good” Janis said slightly out of breath. (Y/N) smirked and blushed “you’re really good too…j?” (Y/N) sounded a little worried. “Was this just like a one time thing or…” Janis thought (Y/N) was absolutely adorable for asking this. “Hmm I don’t know baby…do you want it to be a one time thing?” “NO I mean no” (Y/N) says trying to play it off. “Janis, will you be my girlfriend” says (Y/N) very quickly. Janis kisses (Y/N) “absolutely, I would love to be you girlfriend” (Y/N) giggles a little “hmm girlfriend can we cuddle and watch a Disney movie” Janis jokes, “like this or do we need clothes” (Y/N) thinks for a minute, “like this” tangling their legs together and kissing her girlfriend. Janis plays with (Y/N)’s hair. “(Y/N)?” Janis whispers. “Yeah?” (Y/N) answers slightly confused. Janis kisses her. (Y/N) smiles and blushes. They cuddle closer as they both slowly doze off towards the end of the movie.

A/N: this is my first time writing smut so I’m sorry if it’s bad lol

[tm-trx]

currents.05

weekly round-up in media [29 jan-4 feb 2023]

~ sp*ilers for 609 Bedtime Story, A League of Nobleman, The New Employee, and Never Let Me Go ~

[listening]

Monsta X’s “The Dreaming” album - new discovery and I’ve had it on repeat

[reading]

Imago series by NR Walker - short and sweet adult contemporary mlm romance set in Australia; come for the romance, stay for the butterfly conservation and near-death experiences - reread

Pocketful of Soul by @jenroses - Mo Xuanyu-centric MDZS time travel fix-it and one of my 2022 favorites - reread

Dawn Will Break by ca_pierson and darkmoore - Stargate Atlantis AU - Written for the 2010 Big Bang, this is one of my favorites. A bare bones summary: After dying, John Sheppard dimension hops into multiple versions of himself to fix whatever is wrong there, at the behest of the Ancients. - reread

[watching]

609 Bedtime Story - Well that was a way to end it I guess. I did like how they resolved things with Mint, but I was hoping she’d figured out the connection between Mum and Dew. But that would mean talking about the parallel world again and they apparently decided that the entire conceit of the show didn’t matter anymore after ep 9. I’m so annoyed. (Edit: I just found out there is an alternate ending airing next week; most likely an ‘unhappy’ ending. What are you doing, show? I’m not even mad about it, just more confused.)

A League of Nobleman - The show I’m enjoying the most this week. I didn’t expect such gorgeous visuals in a historical mystery that isn’t a fantasy. There’ve been two mysteries so far and the second one involved a serial killer. I enjoyed the heck out of that arc. I have affectionately nicknamed Zhang Ping ‘Eyebrows’ in my head because those are some fantastic ones he’s sporting. Kudos to the makeup team.

The Lost Tomb (2015) - Binged most of season one last night and I’m hooked. This is amazing. Also, surprise Yang Yang! (I’d forgotten why it was on my watchlist, so he must be why.) The quality level is about late 90s/early 2000s but that was early fandom in my life, so nostalgia is hitting me hard. I’m having a great time with this one.

The New Employee - Seven episodes feels like a weird episode count for a series, but okay - I watched the last two episodes back to back and loved how they ended it. I do find it interesting however, that we never saw the ex/crush again after he was the trigger for the main relationship blip. It felt like they were going to take that further. I probably should have waited to binge this in one go, because I had completely forgotten that there was a manager who could cause trouble until he caused trouble. These short form dramas are generally pretty frustrating to watch because I can clearly see a longer (usually better) show around them. This one did feel complete, but I’m hoping they release a movie version.

[anticipating]

SHINee - Key’s album repackage is this month! Onew finished recording something! Minho is too tall! Taemin D-57!

[random notes from my tv journal]

609 Bedtime Story, ep 11 - “The kissing sounds don’t match the video?!” (This show botched the ending so bad, in multiple ways. This particular way made me laugh though.)

A League of Nobleman, ep 6 - “Surprise serial killer! Neat!”

My School President, ep 9 - “Gun and Tinn’s little scene on the beach while spying on Sound gave me major ‘future old married couple’ feelings.” (And now I want to read that future fic where Gun is home on break from touring and teasing his doctor husband into relaxing after a stressful shift.)

Never Let Me Go, ep 8 - “That was an extremely ominous music cue to tag the bathroom confrontation scene with.” (Up until that last moment it felt like any other scene in this show, but the music change elevated it and made it seem like Ben was going to come back and murder the kid. It threw me out of the scene it was such a jarring escalation. I may go back and watch it again, to see how it feels on rewatch.)

previous Currents posts

[rickchung]

Level Up x The Westin Bayshore x Coal Harbour.

Neon-lit pop-up games room inside the hotel's Grand Ballroom open until Jan. 5.

Classic arcade games, video game consoles, skee-ball, ping pong, foos ball, and air hockey.

Full-size pickle ball court, synthetic curling rink, movie theatre, and kids' zone for ages 2-6.

[blorbocedes]

Here's list of the ones I have save. I am literally trusting you with a part of my life on the internet here, so do not shame me for the weirdness –

https://the-place-to-sparkle.tumblr.com/post/667010287034056704/can-you-imagine-where-your-kid-from-a-previous

2.

https://edie-baby.tumblr.com/post/657132466590646272/it-might-be-heaven-lando-norris-x-reader

3. 

https://gothicwidowsworld.tumblr.com/

Their baby daddy series is good.

4. https://harleysarchive.tumblr.com/post/650531903783501824/here-is-my-masterlist-of-everything-i-have-done-on

It has Fernando in it, don't blame me 😔

5. https://athenathesharkwrites.tumblr.com/post/650887063143579648/werewolf-soulmate-daniel-ricciardo

I am a sucker for Human x supernatural creature dynamic

6. https://taiyakimmy.tumblr.com/post/669605496727175168/tease-or-be-teased-daniel-ricciardo-x-reader

It has reader has Yuki's Honorary Sister. It's cute.

7.

https://acollectionofficsandshit.tumblr.com 

Their three of us is very good in my opinion.

8.

https://illicitlimerence writes.tumblr.com/post/148727211284/masterlist

Anything from here is gold.

9.

https://oscar-piastri.tumblr.com/post/672752528907173888/rewriting-history-pierre-gasly-x-reader

This is one of the best "nature decisions to interfere to fix their relationship" concept I have read.

10. https://writtendaydreamm.tumblr.com/post/662832044683952128/green-eyed-monster-summary-lando-isnt-too-happy

It's angsty, I love angst, sue me.

11.

https://art-outlaw.tumblr.com/post/653336250772799488/updated-22-jan-2022-daniel-ricciardo-private

12. https://formula1andbeyond.tumblr.com/post/671830186758717440/hey-can-i-request-a-pierre-one-where-you-have

13.

https://theonly1outof-a-billion.tumblr.com/post/663354462230970370/hi-can-i-ask-for-an-imagine-with-lewis-

14.

pleaseit https://danielxricciardo.tumblr.com/post/653438128990846976/masterlist

Their cheater series is good and philosophical.

15.

https://seasidetom.tumblr.com/post/667143574959390720/fever-dream-george-russell

Concept is very cute.

16.

Severalforraelee.tumblr.com

The girls and Prove it series literally owns me.

17.

Xhopelesslyxromanticx, they have a few ones but all of them are good. I'd personally recommend the Lewis' wife cheating on him with Charles one.

As you can probably tell I have a thing for Single mom/Single dad trope 💀.

anon I could never shame you for this, in my heart of hearts I am living my best fernando alonso x reader life; and it is not weird to enjoy fandom the way you like it!!!

PINGING THE OTHER ANON WHO WANTED f1 x reader recs!!! see if this is to your taste!!!

I'm honestly impressed at the range, and I thank you for how comprehensive the list is. someone put their heart and soul into writing these and I fuck with that heavy, after all why Shouldn't your favourite driver in love with you.... and you are a mermaid.... the world is your oyster....

[yeehawbvby]

FAWY Minis | Ch. 1 (Seb POV) (EDITED JAN. 9 2025)

Rating: Mature/Explicit

Notes: This one takes place during chapter 2 and 3 of FAWY.

I hope I did well with Seb's POV :') Kinda wanted to show that he’s a little bit of a perv lmao but, like, he’s chill. For now. Y’all know how it goes.

Enjoy and take care! x

Check it out on ao3!

Falling Away With You (main story)

Next

“C’mon, man! Lighten up!” Sam nudges me, Abby becoming collateral damage. Abby nudges me back towards Sam. A human fuckin’ metronome . “You can work laaater.”

“I really couldn’t just take one week off from this?” I groan, “My job is just as important as yours, dipshit. This module is due tomorrow morning. ” I run a hand through my hair. I’m trying not to feel miserable but they’re testing me. “It’s not like the saloon is going anywhere. My income, on the other hand…”

The purple-haired creature pipes up, “You wouldn’t get to see me if you stayed home.” 

I lean down to her eye level. “Good,” I snarl. She giggles, and fights back by pushing me again. If only she knew I was serious this time.

As we descend down the steps in front of the community center, Sam and Abby fall into some of their usual banter. I fall back a little, pulling up my hood. My temple pings with a headache, and I shove my hands in my pockets, chipping at my nail polish from under the fabric. Mentally planning my work schedule for the long night ahead of me. Wishing I could light a cig... Don’t feel like dealing with Abby’s scolding, though.

We turn the corner, and I can vaguely see a short figure in the distance through the raindrops. I shrug it off, but Sam sure doesn’t.

"Hey,” he shouts, “is that the new farm girl?!”

I hear a feminine mumble as the person comes to a stop. Sam takes the opportunity to run ahead of Abby and I, off to greet her. 

“For fuck’s sake,” Abby mumbles under her breath. “Aren’t there enough bitches around here?”

“Ab.” I roll my eyes. “Don’t be a dick.”

“What? You don’t think it’s weird some girl just up-and-moved here of all places with her grandaddy’s money?” she harshly whispers back. “I can smell the privilege from here. She won’t last a month on that old farm.” 

I don’t bother answering. There’s no reasoning with her weird “I’m not like other girls” femcel bullshit. 

Now that we’ve almost caught up, I can finally make out some of the new girl’s features… 

Huh.

Cute.

The conversation fades to the background of my mind as I inspect our new resident. She’s small. Just as small as Abby. Another chihuahua to look after… That big sweater takes up most of her body, though, making her look even tinier. Maybe even kinda innocent. Not in a young and helpless way, but rather a way where she could destroy me with a few simple words and have no fuckin’ clue.

I finally hear her talk, and without thinking, I respond, a small hum of approval escaping me. Nice voice, too… Fuck, wait. She wasn’t even talking to me. Goddamnit. Before I have time to get lost in thoughts of how fucking awkward I am, I notice her eyeing me back.

I tilt my head, trying not to look too amused by the blatant observation — by how flustered she gets, trying to figure out how to save herself.

Oh.

Oh, she’s really cute.

“Are you Robin’s son?” 

My brows quirk up a bit. I guess she’s met mom. I’m surprised that the woman hasn’t talked my ear off about this one yet.

Before I can answer the question, Abby cuts me off and clings onto me. Not this shit again. Every time we meet someone new, she gets protective over me. So annoying.

After she’s done being scolded by Sam, Abby starts toward the Stardrop. When I don’t budge, she slowly pulls herself off of my arm and makes her way down the road alone.

“Oh, shit, my bad!” I turn my attention back toward Sam as he struggles to speak. He’s still wrapped around the farmer. Pointing a finger at her. Fucking her with his eyes… Yoba. Go ahead buddy. Ask for her name before you ogle, at least. You’ve got this. “Sorry, uh…” Sigh. Nice attempt, Samson.

“Elise.”

“Elise!” Sam parrots back. 

Elise...

Pretty.

Sam messes with Elise’s hair before detaching himself, catching up with Abby. 

Elise watches Sam for a sec before looking at me. Then back at him. Then me. Then the ground, then Sam again, following alongside me as I begin the trek towards the other two. 

“He’s like a giant puppy,” I hear her mumble. Can’t help the grin that curls up my lips before I respond. 

We settle into some small talk — surprisingly bearable small talk — and I steal some more peeks at her. Got caught. Shit. I look away, hoping I wasn’t too creepy about it.

The night goes on as usual. Sam and I play pool. Sam gets his ass beat at pool. Abby has a partner on the sidelines for once, but spends the whole time interrogating the poor thing. Seems to hold her own just fine, though, aside from the obvious anxiousness that slowly fades the more drunk she gets.

Eventually, Elise and I are alone again, and we manage to bond a bit. She lets it slip that she thinks I’m ~cool~. Not complaining about that. Not gonna let her live it down so easily, either… assuming we hang out again sometime. We’ll see. 

We go outside, because Abby, and I promptly light up a cigarette. Fucking finally. 

After making her way to the other side of me, Elise asks how I’m doin’. I, as kindly as I can through my annoyance, tell her I’m not keen on having that conversation. Don’t feel like explaining to someone I barely know that a short-term, hormonally driven crush on Ab back in grade school lead to her being a fucking creep long-term. 

She adorably salutes me, and slurs, “You got it, sir.”

…Sir?

Huh.

Hot.

I watch as she lazily falls into the brick wall and slides down the side of it onto the wet ground. Fuck it, I think, sitting down beside her. 

After a few moments, I feel Elise’s eyes on me again. 

I try to hide my smirk as I ask, “Can I help you?” 

I hear a small squeak escape her – must be a weird reflex, or something… not the first time she’s done that tonight – and don’t bother hiding my grin this time around. I look her way, and her gaze is trained on my cig rather than me.

“C-can I try?” she asks meekly, grabby-handing underneath one of her oversized sleeves. 

“...No.” She pouts, leaning into her knees. Oh my god. I sigh, “Do you even smoke?”

“No…”

“Then why the fuck would you even think starting now?” I scold, taking another puff. 

I blow the smoke in her direction, and she coughs through her giggles. “Dude, what th’fuck!” she whines, swatting the air in front of her.

“Doesn’t feel so great, does it?” I pry. “You don’t wanna do this to your lungs. Trust me.”

“Then why do you do it?” A fair point. “Isn’t it kinda hypocritical to be all,” Elise lowers her voice, and tries to imitate me “You don’t wanna do this!” I start laughing at her, but she doesn’t seem to care, too set on getting her point across. She raises her voice to its normal octave, continuing, “When you’re literally doing the exact thing y’don’t want me to–”

“Fine, fine,” I snort, cutting her off. “You have a point.” She beams, and I hold up a finger to pause her. “Just gimme one good reason, and this cigarette’s all yours.” 

She eyes me up and down for a bit. Thinking too hard for that tipsy lil’ brain of hers. S’making me feel kinda giddy, not gonna lie. I guess I’m a little tipsy myself.

I lean my cheek into my equipped hand, inspecting her, inspecting me. 

“You look, like…” she blushes a little, “ridiculously edgy and cool.” 

Oh my god. 

I stifle a laugh. “...Final answer?”

She nods proudly in response. How the fuck can I say no to that?

“Fine, here.” I hand over the weapon, and she hesitates before putting her lips around it. When she finally finds the courage to breathe it in, she immediately starts coughing. Can’t help but laugh at it.

“Bro, that shit sucks!” she claims into her elbow, giving the cigarette back with her free arm. 

I take it back, and have another puff before putting the thing out on the ground. Through watery eyes and tiny coughs, Elise calls me a litter bug. 

I look around at the ground, riddled with cigarette butts from Shane, Pam and myself.

She’s got a good point…

After her coughing fit dies down, we eventually start talking again, and find out we have more in common than I’d assumed. Neither of us are people-people. Both had rough school and social lives growing up. Had our own emo phases (I got teased by her for still being in mine). Etcetera. 

Oddly enough, this goblin seems to get me better than my own friends do.

Don’t judge a book by its cover, or whatever the fuck, I guess.

Some more conversation and a few cigarettes later, she decides it’s her bed time. I almost don’t want her to go… almost offer to walk her home too, but that probably isn’t a good idea. I simply tell her to get home safe and head back into the Stardrop. 

When I get back in, mom gives me a weird wink and a smile. Yoba, I can sense her getting ready to set up Elise and I already... Abby, on the other hand, leaves without a word after flashing me a good stink eye. And Sam runs over to me, ready to interrogate. Ready to Sam all over me. We take our usual spots on the couches in the back, and I fill him in on the absolutely underwhelming time I had outside with Elise.

Well. I say it’s underwhelming, but in reality, I can’t get her off my fucking mind. Those nice legs, the potty mouth (an unexpected but welcomed attribute), her adorable smile, her sparkly, curious eyes…

Damn it.

[urimaginespimp]

How You Get The Girl (This Love Final Part)

Bucky x Reader (elemental witch)

Set on TFATWS last episode

Note: Thank you to everyone that's tuned in, gave feedbacks, and liked/reblogged. I had to so much fun writing these! After this I’ll be working on oneshots completely unrelated to this story of several prompts.

We got a new Cap!

Previous Part: Untouchable

Marvel Masterlist

--------

“I’m serious, Shuri. I am over him.” you groaned as Shuri won’t wipe off the smug, disbelieving look on her face.

“Sure, Jan.” She replied getting up to continue on what’s she’s working on.

“Hey, I know that reference!”

“I’m just saying... Seven years of pinning over the guy – which five of it was when he was practically dead, by the way – and you’re telling me it took one confrontation for you to get over him.” She shrugged.

Some of the Dora Milaje were also in the lab, and you haven’t been vocal about it, but you didn’t miss the knowing looks they’ve been exchanging every time Bucky was brought in the conversation.

“Well, it would really be nice if you’re being supportive right now.” you sulked in your seat. Yeah, who were you kidding. Maybe you’re not completely, completely over him, but now you’re sorting to the fake it ‘til you make it method and so far, you’re doing well.

“Okay, fine. Want me to set you up with someone? My brother has some contacts around the world and I think with some buttering up he’d consider setting you up to bachelor royalties.” She wiggled her brows at you.

“May I suggest the Prince of Brunei? The internet says he’s looking for a wife.” One of the ladies snickered, making the others hum in approval.

“T’Challa knows him?” this piqued your interest. “He’s pretty hot.”

“Well make up your mind. It’ll take me a few business days of persuading my brother.” She raised her brows at you.

“It wouldn’t hurt to start dating. I’ll think about it first.” you muttered, missing how Shuri winked at the other ladies in the room. Ayo had told her in private about Bucky’s little confession to Zemo, and the princess has a few tricks up her sleeve to speed up the matchmaking process.

“I’m only staying for a few days more. It’s been a few weeks and Val’s been complaining from lack of sleep.” She’s been taking over your nightly escapades, and it’s starting to irritate her to be surrounded with so much booze but not being able to indulge.

Just then, Okoye enters the lab. “Check the news. There’s a live coverage of a hostage in New York. Sam and White Wolf are on it.”

--------

Bucky was looking over proudly as Sam was talking to the Senator.

Seeing Sam now walking over to him, he straightened up and cleared his throat. “Sorry, I uh was texting and all I heard was um a black guy in stars and stripes.”

They both chuckled, now walking side by side. “Nice job, Cap.”

“Thanks.”

--------

He’s done it. He told Yori the truth. Though now that might have been the end of their friendship, he knew the old man deserves the closure for his son.

Now back in his apartment, he took the notebook Steve once owned from his pocket, and opened it to the page where his list is. Looking over it, he saw that the only name left uncrossed is yours.

Just then, his phone pinged twice. One message was from Sam, and the other one from Shuri.

Sam’s read:

I wasn’t kidding when I told you

back on the boat that I’d get the

younger ones here to give you a

crash course on romance.

Check your email.

He rolled his eyes and opened the one from Shuri.

Y/N’s explained everything to us.

We saw you save those people,

White Wolf. Wakand is proud of you.

Brother says you’re welcome to

visit anytime. Take care!

p.s.

It’s good to know Y/N and you are

are on good terms. It finally allowed me

to set her up with one of the princes

mother’s been pestering me about. One less

off of mother’s list for me.

“Damn it, Shuri.” he groaned, reading the last part over and over again. He had to move fast. Heading over to his email, he opened the one from Sam.

The subject says:

21st century romance for reformed dummies.

There was an attached 60-second video. Clicking on it, he chuckled when Sam’s voice started booming behind the camera, where it showed two young girls and one boy, all around below 10 years of age.

“Okay, I gathered you here today because a cyborg friend of mine is need of help. I already filled you in the details necessary earlier, and all you have to do now is give him quick tips. Remember, talk slow.”

The boy on the middle spoke up. “Is she an avenger?”

“Not important, but yes. It’s the one with similar powers to an avatar.” Sam answered, followed by the two girls saying they know which one, and the boy to mutter ‘damn it I always had a crush on her...’

“Okay the first step would obviously be to say sorry.” the girl on the right said directly to the camera.

“Oh! Extra points if you do it standing like a ghost outside her door and it’s about to rain.” the other girl from the left perked up.

“I said he’s a cyborg, not a weatherman.” Sam commented, still behind the camera.

“Say you were afraid to tell her what you want.” the first girl spoke again.

“Six months is a long time to be afraid, man.” the boy in the middle spoke up this time.

“Try years.” Sam muttered.

“Then you say you want her for worse or for better!” The cheery girl exclaimed once again.

“You’ve been playing too many fake weddings, but yes, that could work.” Sam told her, making her beam, showing a missing tooth.

“Tell her you could wait forever and ever.” the boy added.

“I mean he’s already old enough to be your great grandpa but go on I guess.” Sam was snickering, causing the camera to slightly shake.

“Remind her of how it used to be. That is if he was good to her.” the more mature girl was pointing out. “Saying you’ll put her heart back together could also work.” she smiled, and the other one fake swooned on where she was standing.

“She’s right!” she exclaimed, while boy nods and says “that’s how it works.” at the same time.

Now turning the camera, Sam was now in frame.

“And that’s how you get the girl, Barnes. Straight from the local’s experts. Don’t fuck it up.”

And three voices scolded him for saying a bad word as the clip ends.

--------

It didn’t take long for him to take a flight straight to Norway where New Asgard was. This time without the aid of Zemo’s jet, he had to find the means to travel from the airport, while trying to calm his nerves.

As if the universe was on his side, a couple claiming to be heading back to Asgard allowed him to hitch a ride with them.

Now on the backseat, he tried to make small talk.

“So, uh, how are you guys settling in the planet?” he asked.

The lady on the passenger seat turned to face him with a smile. “It wasn’t easy, really. But the princess went out of her way to educate us about life here on Midgard. She’s so good at it, you’d forget she hasn’t even been living here a decade.”

He smiled. They claim you as their princess despite only being adopted by Thor. He recalls how you once rambled about being scared that they’d be indifferent towards you once Thor brings you to Asgard, one of the reasons you’ve been making up excuses to go with him.

“Why, would you look at that. We’re just in time before it starts raining.” The man driving commented.

Peeking through the window, sure enough, the sky was getting darker.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” he muttered. He might just take the little girl’s advice after all.

After getting out of the couple’s car, he ran straight to where he remembers your home was, just in time when Val just got out of your house.

“Hi. I don’t think we’ve formally met. I’m Bucky.” He greeted extending his ahand to her which she took. A skeptical look on her face.

“Call me Val. I’m sorry what are you doing here?”

“I need to speak to Y/N, please.” He answered truthfully.

“Well it’s about night time so she’s getting dolled up.” She answered

“I know, I know, it’s for her date. But that’s why I’m here.”

Val raised a brow, confused about what date he was getting all bummed about when you were only getting ready to go back to looking out for people out and about at night. But then it dawned to her that maybe this was some of your friend’s doing.

“Y-yes... the date.” She decided to play along, holding back a smirk. Just then, rain started slowly pouring, along with thunder. “Well shit, I have to help some folks get their kids back inside their homes now. You’re free to knock on her door.” She excused herself.

His own clothes were starting to get drenched when he finally knocked on your door.

No answer. He knocked again, louder this time. Now footsteps were heard coming to the door, and the knob turned as you opened it.

“Damn it, Val, the door’s not even lo-” You stopped talking, surprised at the figure that greeted you.

“Bucky... are you insane? Don’t just stand there, come in it’s raining hard.” he urged him to get in and closed the door behind you.

Facing each other, he was taking you in. Val wasn’t lying when she said you were getting ready for your date. He can’t believe he was already getting jealous of a faceless punk.

“So uh... what brings you here?” You decided to break the ice, fidgeting where you stood, still barefoot as it looked like you were gonna have to stay at home if it was going to rain this hard all night.

“Don’t go on the date.” he pleaded, confusing you.

“What?”

“Please don’t go on the date.” He repeated, now walking towards you.

There is no date, but now you were wondering why he’s telling you not to.

“Why?”

“I love you.” he answered without missing a beat, now stepping closer to you. Instead of the reaction he was hoping for, you scoffed and took a step back.

“Don’t pull a Laurie on me.” you replied, a frown etched on your face. He was confused.

“A Laurie?”

“Yeah, I’ve seen enough adaptations of Little Women to know that you’re pulling a Laurie on me.” You spat as a matter of fact. “You’re being really mean, stop it.” you crossed your arms in front of your chest.

“What? I- I haven’t even thought of that reference!” he defends himself, cheeks reddening from embarrassment. “Amy was gonna get married, Y/N.”

“Oh then by all means, feel free to come back just after he proposes.”

“W- We’re getting sidetracked here, doll. I came here hoping there still an ounce of you that loves me. Please don’t tell me you’ve completely moved on from me.”

“What, like it’s hard?” you replied. It surprised you when his brows shot up from recognition of that line.

“Now you’re pulling an Elle Woods on me!” he pointed at you in an accusatory manner.

“Don’t point that finger at me, Barnes. How was I even supposed to know you’ve seen that movie?” you rolled your eyes, walking past him.

“I watched all the movies you told me about back in Wakanda.” he spoke up, making you stop in your tracks to face him again.

“Yeah, that’s right. I watched every movie, I listened to every song, read every book you recommended, and visited every internet site you once said I might like. I was always listening even when I made it seem like I wasn’t.”

You stared at him for a second looking for any indication that he was lying. Recovering from the mild shock, you pursed your lips. “I hope you know the Porn site was a joke. Sam did it to Steve once and I just thought it was hilarious.”

His mouth twitched. Walking over to you once more he stopped when he was only a step away, not breaking eye contact.

“I’m really sorry, Doll. I know it’s bold of me to even ask you, but please give me the chance to make it up to you. And I don’t care if it’s me that has to wait for you this time. Take all the time you need, just please don’t go on that date.”

“Bucky, there was never a date. I have no idea what date you were referring this entire time.” you confessed, making him bring his hands to his face and groan, muttering Damn it, Shuri.

Hearing Shuri’s name, you put two and two together. “Is this about Shuri trying to set me up with a prince?” he nodded as answer. “Well, I did tell her I was gonna think about it.”

He removed his hands away from his face. “Please say no.” He whispered. “I’d tell you what the kids told me what to say if I have to.”

“What kids?”

“Sam got a bunch of kids on video to teach me how to win you back. I’ve already stood under the rain outside your door just like what one of the girls suggested.” Judging from the grin on your face, he was now regretting even mentioning them.

“Well go on, then.” you urged. “Let me see how much you’ve learned.”

“The first time I saw you at the airport, I got so distracted looking at you just casually sitting on top if the ramps while we were preparing to fight. That wink you sent me that day is still engraved in my mind by the way. Then I was so taken back when you bluntly told me you’re attracted to me. I-”

“I don’t think the kids taught you to remind me of my attempts to flirt with you.” You cut him off, embarrassed at the memory. He chuckled at your expression.

“Okay, okay.” he took a deep breath.

“I think I started catching feelings for you the moment they woke me up from my cryosleep and you were there to be the first one to welcome me back. I didn’t think you were still gonna be there like you told me. But you were there, beaming at me like a ray of sunshine. All my years under HYDRA, every time I was woken up, I was only ever treated as an asset. But you welcomed me like I was a friend.” his eyes were starting to get glassy with tears, as he tried not to choke up.

“And then every time you were near, or even when I’d get a whiff of your perfume, I’d start feeling all warm inside and my entire body would be at ease, knowing you were an arm's reach from me. You were the last one I saw as I disintegrated from the blip, and you were the first one I sought out the moment we came back.” he was surprised when you reached forward to wipe away a tear he didn’t even realize had run down his cheek.

“I lied when I said I made a mistake kissing you. It was the first thing I wanted to do the moment I saw you again. But something inside me was always telling me that all I could ever be is someone grateful for your kindness. That it was impossible for the universe to even grant me someone like you after everything I’ve done." He let out a breath before continuing.

"But it was also you, Steve, Sam, and heck – even Zemo– that made me realize that I am worthy of a chance. And I’m sorry it had to take you telling me you were moving on, to have the courage to accept and take the chance that has been long offered to me by the world." He took your hand and gave the back of it a small kiss.

"I love you, Y/N.” Now it was him that had to wipe away your tears away. “Please don’t cry, doll. That wasn’t-”

“Just fucking kiss me already, James.” you laughed, in between sniffles.

He grinned down before you. “You’re my angel with a potty mouth, and I love you.” he whispered, leaning down.

“I love you too."

---------

You and Bucky were out with the Wilsons on their community's afternoon barbeque.

Sarah and you got along with ease, and she was telling you all about their old family business when Bucky hugged you from behind.

"Sorry to interrup, ladies, but I have to show you something Y/N." he said, kissing your cheek.

"Ew, man. I still can't believe your old ass has a girlfriend." Sam commented beside Sarah who was laughing

"You do know I'm older than him, right?" you chuckled.

"I know, but you don't look it." he replied, causing Bucky to flip him off.

Excusing yourself, both of you walked by the docs.

"What's up, old man?" you grinned at him.

"You know what, doll. Most couples would have endearing nicknames for each other."

"I'll call you something sweet once you tell me what that thing you call me when we're alone means."

"What, мое солнце?"

"Yeah, that one! Tell me or else I'll keep calling you ridiculous ones." you threatened, trying not to smile.

"Anyway, мое солнце, I just wanted to show you a text I got from Shuri."

I am yet to have any news that you

manned up and told Y/N you love her,

White Wolf. I was joking before, but now

I really might set her up on a date.

You both chuckled at Shuri's threat.

"I got this." you pulled your phone out of your pocket and dialled her number. You placed it on loud speaker once she picked up.

"Y/N! So nice of you to call."

"Hey, Shuri! Listen..." you feigned seriousness in your voice before releasing a deep breath. "I'm finally over Mr. Smokey eye. I think I'm ready to go on that date now." Bucky was playfully glaring at you for the nickname.

There was dead silence from the other side of the line for a second. "Oh! About that... uh turns out he already has a girlfriend. Planning to propose soon, I heard. Oops!"

"Well that's a bummer. How about the other bachelor royalties your family's friends with? I recently found an article with a list. I can send you one right now. Preferably ones that don't look much like blue-eyed grandpa." you grinned at him as he rolled his eyes. He knows what you were trying to get him to do.

"Uh... turns out my brother isn't that friendly after all." She let out an awkward laugh. "Hasn't Barnes contact you at all?" you could hear the frustration in her voice.

"Oh, that discount prophet, I haven-"

"It means my sun." He finally caved, rolling his eyes.

"What?" you asked him, immidiately forgetting that Shuri was still on.

"WHAT?" she screamed through the phone after a second.

"мое солнце means my sun." he grinned at you.

"Is that Barnes with you?! Hellooo?!!!"

"Talk to you later, princess." you turned off the call when she was about to protest. Facing him again, you stepped closer and put your arms around his shoulders, both of you sharing a grin.

"I love you, мое солнце."

"I love you too, minn stjarna."

"You gonna tell me what that means?"

"You wish."

fin.

--------

@eternalharry @iheartsebandchris @lizzarooni @the-ayo-lit @tanyaherondale @knowyourworth-sellyoursoul @eliwinchester-barnes @ebxny27 @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @fadingdreamersportsmaker @drama-queen-aa

[ineffableplanner]

Wednesday Spotlight #39 - January 20th 2021

What’s new? One newcomer, so most is a re-run of last week.(blink and they might be gone!). Remember, feel free to PM/Ping/telepathically relay to me if you have any zines coming up for sale - or fancomics. (Even if I know of more than a few coming up, the information is greatly appreciated).

If some have gone out of the cycle below, but are still for sale, check the listing on the Trello (Good Omens Posting Events and Fanzine pre-orders)

Good Omens Fanzines open for orders/pre-orders:

Cold Omens - a Good Omens Zine

A love letter to the episode three cold open of the show.

Flaming like Anything 2 [+18] - A Good Omens Erotic Zine

Preorders open until February 2nd!

Love and Lust Through the Ages Vol II

A.Z. Fell’s Erotica: Love and Lust Through the Ages Volume II zine. This zine is full of bottom Aziraphale-centric artwork and writing from over 50 contributors.

Note: as of Jan 6th physical zine is sold out, but digital is still available.

Pin Me Up Zine - a good omens pinup zine [18+]

Pin Me Up Zine is an 18+ Good Omens pinup zine.

Various bundle options are available, both physical zine as well as digital and merch.

Good Omens Fan Comics Open for (pre)order

[NEW] Sweet Hereafter by GingerHaole (Open until January 22nd!)

Sweet Hereafter: a fan art book about Crowley & Aziraphale, two sweet idiots who are STILL in love! This will come with two 4" x 6" postcards featuring some of the art inside.

This book contains both SFW and NSFW illustrations, so please be 18+ to purchase!

Good Omens Comics by AnotherWellkeptSecret

These are no longer available in print form, but you can still get the PDF version. If you want to read the comics online on tumblr, there are links in the post as well. PDF offers better quality and ease of reading.

—————–

Note: Zine pre-orders have been moved from Saturday’s newsletter to Wednesday’s Spotlight post. Zine’s will be spotlight’ed until pre-orders/orders end date. Personal comics will get one spotlight for now - if more weeks go by without any new ones, I’ll re-boost some of the earlier ones.

If you have a fanbook/comic for sale or a fanzine up for pre-order, please PM me to let me know or email me at ineffableplanner (at) gmail.com. I may catch it on my own but better safe than sorry ;) - same goes for any events or zine signups you’d like boosted in the Saturday newsletter. Also a shout-out to those of you who ping me with links, both for events as well as comics and zines.

You can find older editions of the Wednesday spotlight by following the tag #Wednesday spotlight

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #213: COURT-MARTIAL

November, 1981

Aw sweet, I could win a ten-speed!

Welp. Here we go.

This title doesn’t fuck around. This cover doesn’t fuck around.

You know, the Avengers are actually a very rules based organization. In an average issue, its a bit weird to think about these goofuses actually following a charter but its true.

Much more so than the X-Men or the Fantastic Four. The Avengers are always talking about who’s going to be the chairman and procedural things. I think because the Avengers are more a group of equals than the X-Men or Fantastic Four are. The X-Men and the FF have a clear cut leader.

But the Avengers need rules because your common Avengers either all think they could be leading the team, actually could, or all of the above. They need an explicit charter to keep those egos in line.

But I guess my point is, having read 213 and change issues relating to the Avengers, you’d think that court martials would show up more often. They are a group prone to nonsense decisions. I think the one other one we see has Iron Man court martialed and suspended for a time for not responding to an Avengers call and not being able to account for it (since it related to secret identity stuff).

I have to figure that they tend to happen off-screen as necessary with exoneration generally occurring.

This one happens on-screen. And follows up on last time: wherein Yellowjacket shot a mysterious magic woman in the back when Cap was trying to use words and not punches to resolve things.

This is a grim day for the Avengers. They have to put one of their own under investigation and their furnishing related mishaps just keep mishappening.

Look at Thor and Iron Man squeezed onto one tiny table. Cap doesn’t even have room. He has to dramatically stand.

Although this is actually the pre-court martial. Captain America has leveled charges on Yellowjacket and Thor and Iron Man are going to decide whether it warrants proceeding or not.

Captain America: “Yesterday, we engaged in combat with a mysterious woman possessing strange, awesome powers who was attacking Washington, D.C.  After heavy fighting -- I managed to win through her defenses and reach her! I’d succeeded in convincing her to cease hostilities -- when, suddenly, for no reason, Yellowjacket blast her with his disruptor ‘sting’ at full force -- in the back! Fortunately, she weathered his attack -- but his action re-ignited the conflict! It could have cost us all our lives... and left the city defenseless!”

Iron Man asks whether Yellowjacket has any explanation for his action.

And since “I was a jerk!” isn’t a great defense, Hank goes with “no explanation!”

Without any explanation for his actions, its decided to convene a formal court martial for three days hence. Until then, Yellowjacket is on temporary suspension. Since Avengers don’t carry guns or badges, he’s asked to turn over his Avengers’ priority ID card. Which presumably gets you discounts at the snack bar as well as some sway with the government and such.

Hank protests but the rules are firm and Hank himself helped write them back in the day.

Outside the... meeting room? Tiny library? Gosh, I’d love a layout to the Avengers mansion. Why aren’t they meeting in their sweet conference room- oh right. The table shrank.

Anyway, outside wherever, Wasp in her new... and frankly lingerie-looking costume is fretting.

(Jan, why are your fashion instincts so hit and miss and miss?)

And then Tigra boops her on the head.

Tigra has continued to be as cat as an equivalent weight in cats and has climbed the wall to hang out on the wall trim. Somehow.

Wasp: “Tigra! What are you doing up there?”

Tigra: “Same thing you’re doing down there -- wondering what’s going on inside! When cats get nervous, they climb! You should try it! It might relax you!”

Tigra also assures Wasp that everything will be alright but privately hopes that it will be. And also dunks on Hank a little.

Tigra: (I’ve never seen a woman so hung up on a guy! And such a strange guy! He seems like such a cold fish... all wrapped up in whatever murky stuff is churning around inside himself! He gives me the creeps!)

Yellowjacket comes out of the whatever room and Wasp is immediately on him, asking he hold her. And he’s like

mmnnyurrh

Yellowjacket: “Jan, just -- just get away from me! Leave me alone! Haven’t I got enough to contend with without you slobbering all over me?”

When she turns away sadly he apologizes and hugs her, saying he’s just afraid because the Avengers are going to court martial him.

A still lurking on the wall like a five foot something cat Tigra wonders to herself “Jan, baby! I just don’t get it! Don’t you know you’re worth ten of him?”

She’s right and she should say it.

The pre-court martial panel splits, to meet up again in three days for the court martial.

Captain America flips off the roof into a thunderstorm to get some serious thinking and flashbacking done. He’s extra like that. I mean, seriously. There’s a front door, STEVE.

Cap: “I wonder... am I doing the right thing? Was Yellowjacket’s action just a mistake -- ? Something that could happen to anyone?”

He thinks back to the war, when he in disguise as Perfectly Average Steve Rogers PFC was on a recon patrol and his unit ran right into a huge German advance.

His unit got cut to pieces around him until he was the only one left. At that point, he ripped his uniform off to reveal he was dressed in layers as CAPTAIN AMERICA.

I was going to snark that his secret identity was worth more than the lives of his unit but I dunno that even a Captain America could have done much to save his GI guys. The way its portrayed and all. Steve even thinks that his number is up so might as well go out as CAPTAIN AMERICA.

“It was early in my career -- after I had established myself but before I had seen much front-line combat! Till that day, I hadn’t suspected how wise the government had been in giving me this costume! The very sight of Captain America seemed to terrify the German soldiers, as, fighting like a man possessed, I cut a swath through their ranks...”

Cap fought and fought until there were no more enemies standing. Surrounded by collapsed and probably unconscious and not at all dead German soldiers.

He hears a sound behind him and acting on battle instinct he throws his mighty shield with the intention to make someone yield.

But: instant regrets.

“The sound was a child... a war orphan, collecting brass to sell for money to buy food! Thank god, she was bending to pick up a shell casing just as my shield would have struck! Meant to stun a full-grown man, it probably would have broken her neck if it had hit!”

Wow! Cap almost killed an orphan!

The point being that Cap wonders if he has the right to accuse Hank, when “there, but for the grace of god...”

Meanwhile, Iron Man has stayed back at the mansion to refresh his memories with some research in the Avengers records.

This is one part a montage of previous Hank Pym moments and one part ‘actually I did do the research before I wrote this’ from Jim Shooter.

Because, yeah, Jim Shooter, according to Jim Shooter, went back and reread every single appearance by Hank Pym and Janet Van Dyne before writing this story. Believe it or don’t but the montage is here so he at least did enough to get panels to reference or reuse.

Iron Man notes Hank’s tendency to change identities and costumes frequently, how his gaining the power to go giant didn’t work out too well for him, how he left and rejoined the group, never seemed comfortable with the Avengers, and in Iron Man’s estimation that he felt outclassed by the other founders.

And perhaps the reason he kept ping ponging between the team and his research was a lack of success in either one. How his attempts to achieve a scientific breakthrough to prove himself (I guess Pym Particles are a case of ‘what have you done for me lately?’ or just that he didn’t want to be a one-hit wonder) bore only Ultron, one of the Avengers’ deadliest enemies.

Iron Man: “But I wonder... can he ever truly be free of the spectre of Ultron -- ? Can he ever be more than a haunted, hollow man drowning in a sea of guilt over the wrongs done by his monstrous creation? Can he ever rid himself of the desperate need he has to redeem himself in his own eyes?”

That’s a hell of a way to talk about your friend, Tony. I know the Avengers have a policy of not interfering in each others personal lives but its probably not the best policy to watch him struggling and just wait to see if he figures out his shit on his own.

I don’t know.

Iron Man: “And if he is in that kind of inner turmoil, he needs our help... our support... our love! Hank is a friend to us all... a founder of this group! How can we turn our backs on him when he needs us most? How dare we punish him for a mistake that any of us might have made?”

Oh! Well! Learn me to not flip the page. I guess in fairness Hank has been at his worst here than previous times.

Anyway, as I said, Tony doing this research mirrors Jim Shooter doing his research. And Tony reaches much the same conclusion as Shooter does, although perhaps more kindly worded.

Jim Shooter: “Back in 1981 I was writing the Avengers. Hank Pym aka Yellowjacket was married to Janet Van Dyne aka the Wasp and things had not been going well for him for a long time. Before I embarked on the storyline ... I reread every single appearance of both characters. His history was largely a litany of failure, always changing guises and switching back and forth from research to hero-ing because he wasn’t succeeding at either. He was never the Avenger who saved the day at the end and usually the first knocked out or captured. His most notable ‘achievement’ in the lab was creating Ultron. Meanwhile, his rich, beautiful wife succeeded in everything she tried. She was also always flitting around his shoulders, saying things to prop up his ego.”

Geez, Jim.

I don’t know about Hank never saving the day at the end. Never is a bit much. But I don’t want to reread 213 minus issues to say for sure.

But this is the portrayal of Hank that went into writing this story and Iron Man is the one who speaks it aloud.

Outside the mansion, Wasp and Yellowjacket run into a group of young fans right as they leave. The fans all want Wasp’s autograph and mistake Hank’s codename for Bumblebee and ask if he’s ever done anything.

Wasp: “Look, I’m just his sidekick! You’d better get his autograph too!”

A child, probably: “Nah! We just want yours! Right, guys?”

This is like that scene with Hulk in Endgame where he tries to get the fans to appreciate Ant-Man too, to Scott’s growing annoyance with the situation. Except not as played for laughs.

On their limo ride to their Cresskill, NJ home, Wasp tells Hank not to let those smart-aleck kids get to him.

Yellowjacket: “... Well, they were right! What have I ever done? Nothing!”

Wasp: “Hank, don’t be silly! Oh, who cares what they think? You’ll always be my hero!”

In fairness, Wasp has been actively on the team for a bit and memories are short. Hank’s been busy in his lab. Which Wasp reminds him but that's the lab she paid for and where he’s accomplished NOTHING!

The staff of the house also dig the knife in a little, possibly unintentionally but eh who can say. When they address the couple Mrs. Pym, aka the person who signs their checks is primary and Hank is the after thought. But possibly they just interact more with Jan if Hank has been cooped up in his lab.

Jenkins: “Welcome home, Mrs. Pym! Uh, you too, sir!”

Jenkins in the next panel: “Madame, would you like us to begin preparing your luncheon now? And Mr. Pym’s too, of course!”

And then, things get awkward. Although oh lord, Jan is trying.

Wasp: “Alone at last! Thank goodness! It seems that we never have any time just to be together by ourselves anymore! You know, just to talk, and --”

Yellowjacket: “I don’t want to talk about my problems, Jan! I know you mean well, but --”

Wasp: “But I’m ‘dingaling Jan, the airhead heiress’! Every time I try to help I just make things worse! I know! I -- I’m sorry! I always goof everything up... always say the wrong things! I’m such a dumbbell! It’s a good thing I found you to think for me, darling! You’re so smart... so strong... mmm... so sexy! All I want to do is melt in your arms... be yours! I need you to protect me and keep me warm, lover! Oh, Hank! Let’s just sneak off to bed and cuddle and kiss and -- and let me show you how much I love you! Whaddaya say, big boy?”

Yellowjacket: “Uh... not now, honey! I -- I’m just, just a little too tense now! You understand, don’t you? I think I’ll go putter around in the lab for awhile! Maybe that’ll relax me! See you later... okay?”

Eeesh.

Eeeeeeeeesh. It almost hurts watching Jan diminish herself so much to try to make him feel better.

Although a lot of her solutions seem to be ‘lets make out until you feel better’ but she did offer to talk. Not even about anything specific. And Hank automatically assumes that the only thing to possibly talk about is his problems.

Hank locks himself up in his lab, realizing that he’s disappointed Jan but saying that its better to not even try to get romantic while he’s this upset.

Yellowjacket: “I wouldn’t blame her if she hated me! I’m a failure as a husband... just like I’m a failure as a hero! So here I am again, hiding out in the lab... where I’m a failure as a scientist! I hate this place! ... But I keep coming back -- because, here at least I had one success!”

And yes, that one success he credits himself with... is Ultron!

Yellowjacket: “Yes... here I accomplished what no one else ever has! I built a robot capable of independent thought! Here, I created... Ultron! Even that went wrong! Even that, my own success turned into a disaster! A failure! But maybe, just maybe, my one success will yet provide the key to my salvation!”

And he starts putting together a new robot!

Hoooooooooo boyyyyyyyyyyyyy, Hank. Building robots isn’t always the solution!

Also: in order: does the robot Human Torch just not count then? And do Pym Particles not count?

SCENE AND TIME CHANGE

Three days have passed, it is dawn of the three days later.

Tigra is spending her morning napping because she is here to cat to the utmost.

Look at this. Ridiculous.

You are a ridiculous individual, Tigra Greer Grant Nelson.

And like a cat, sleep can be a tenuous thing for the faint sound of footstep on carpet outside her room has her spring out of bed and answer the door of her room before Jarvis even knocks.

Because Tigra is here to be a cat and unnerve Jarvis, for reasons which escape me.

She jokes about Jarvis bringing her a mouse for breakfast but he’s really here with her weekly stipend check from Tony Stark.

This is a thing that’s been implied but not explicitly spoken but the Avengers actually get paid for being Avengers. Its not really a salary as much as a stipend.

I don’t know that there’s a difference, except maybe legally. Maybe in regards to taxes. Maybe stipends don’t get income taxed and you don’t need to submit a form to the IRS.

That our Tony! Ha ha ha pay your taxes ya dink

Anyway, the weekly check is a ‘merely’ a modest stipend to defray miscellaneous living expenses. Most Avengers refuse the stipend because, well, they don’t need it! And most Avengers aren’t going to pocket a thousand dollars they don’t need just to laugh at Tony for handing out free money.

Your Thors, Iron Mans, Wasps and Antgiantyellowjacket Men.

But the Avengers that live in the mansion and have no outside means of support (definitely Hawkeye whenever he was on the team, definitely Beast and he definitely bought weed with it, Wonder Man, probably Scarlet Witch and Vision) accept the money.

Tigra: “Well, I’ll sure take it! I’m tired of being broke!”

And then she actually looks at the check.

Tigra: “Jarv, this check -- ! It’s for a thousand dollars!”

Jarvis: “If that is not sufficient, madame, I’m sure Mr. Stark would be happy to increase the amount!”

Tigra: “Increase the --! No, that’s okay, Jarv! This’ll do just fine! Whee! We’re in the money... we’re in the money!”

So according to an online calculator $1000 in 1981 dollars is worth about $2,820.56 in 2020 dollars!

Plus no rent because firemen sleep in the firehouse!

Being good really is its own reward! Where do I get some superpowers, an invitation to the Avengers, and probably a c-list fodder death in the next event!

Ok so maybe its not all great to be an Avenger. But the monetary compensation certainly sounds good to some!

And it bears mentioning that Tigra signed up to be an Avenger when all she thought she’d get out of it was a place to sleep and a chance to do hero stuff.

Anyway, Jarvis also reminds her that she has to attend the court martial meeting at four, prompting her to say “Aw! Don’t remind me of downers like that now, Jarv!”

You’re a classy person, Tigra.

Stop sexually harassing the butler and also anyone. Its just uncomfortable.

And poor Jarvis continues to be allergic to cats and giant woman cats. Poor, poor Jarvis.

As four approaches, the Avengers all start to head to the mansion for the court martial.

Iron Man as Tony Stark, normal billionaire man, cuts short a board meeting claiming another appointment. One of the board members is like lucky dog is probably off to a date with a startlet but oh ironies man, Tony would trade places with the board guy Dillworth if he could because he’s not looking forward to this.

And at Upper West Side Medical Clinic, Brilliant Perfectly Normal Surgeon Dr. Donald Blake is doing surgery when he realizes drat that Avengers meeting is soon.

So he asks the other doctors to finish up without him and takes off.

In fairness, in fairness! The patient was out of mortal peril. It was just the closing up and such that was left. But the other doctors are like look at that arrogant doctor man, he may be the best doctor on Earth but I don’t like his attitude.

And in the court martial room waits Captain America. Still stuck in that conundrum he’s been in.

Captain America: “When the court martial convenes, I don’t know how I’m going to find the courage to look Hank in the eye and then demand that he be expelled from the Avengers -- but I must... though it will be the most difficult thing I’ve ever done! I’m going to prosecute the case as best I can... because it’s my duty! But all the while I’ll be praying that they acquit you, Hank! I hope you understand!”

Cap is at least fair handed here. This is exactly the treatment he demanded for himself in the Charles Soule She-Hulk series where he asked Matt Murdock to prosecute the hell out of him and She-Hulk to be his defense in a wrongful death lawsuit.

The idea is this: if Hank is acquitted, then it clears his name without a shadow of a doubt because Cap wouldn’t have gone easy. Accountability, its a hell of a thing.

BUT NOW WE GO BACK SEVERAL HOURS to Cresskill and the casa de Wasp.

Janet woke up and found no Hank. He’s been locked in his lab since they got back from the pre-court martial three days ago. And she’s gotten worried that he’s hurt himself or gotten ill so she decides to invade his privacy a little bit.

Hank has locked the lab door but Jan can just about wriggle through the top because the insulation is a little cracked.

So she squirms into the very small gap between door and frame.

And finds Hank has built a medium giant robot.

He’s just finishing up the programming. Because he’s programming the robot (he calls it Sal, short for Salvation I) to locate and identify the Avengers visually as well as by brain-wave patterns.

Hank this is all very dubious! I can’t think of a good reason why you might secretly be building a robot and putting all of your friends’ faces in it!

But Sal’s detectors are running and its suddenly pinging two Avengers in the area, not one. And when Hank turns on the visual scan system to check, whoops! Jan’s here! Jan saw your robot!

Hank freaks out a little bit.

He slams his fist on the computer near where tiny bug her is standing and shouts.

Yellowjacket: “What are you doing here? Why did you come here? WHY?”

She tells him that she was worried because she hasn’t seen him in days but he accuses her of spying on him.

Jan reiterates that she wasn’t spying. She just wanted to make sure he was ok.

Annnnnnd. Hank decides that Jan being here is a serendipitous chance to test his new robot!

By having it attack Jan!

HANK!

Sal charges Jan and grabs her in its giant pincer hands. Jan tries blasting it with her bio-electric sting but to no effect.

As Hank brags Sal is made of invulnerable adamantium. Plus plus plus, he’s programmed to respond if she tries shrinking.

Yellowjacket: “Yeah, Sal’s a pretty tough customer... powerful enough to trash all of the Avengers together! No one can stop him -- except me, because I happen to know about his little secret weak spot! One precisely placed shot with my disruptor-blast stinger -- and Sal collapses, defeated!”

Jan then asks the pertinent question.

Hank Pym what the hell is this robot for??

Yellowjacket: “Why, I’m going to save my career, Jan! That’s what I’m going to do! Let’s be realistic, shall we? The charge against me is ‘endangering the safety of fellow Avengers and civilians through neglect’! The penalty is expulsion! They’re going to boot me out! This ‘court martial’ is just a formality!”

This isn’t a good plan. Nothing here is good. Only bad things will occur.

I’m not being silly, for a change. This is a bad scene.

It does what it intends to do, more or less. But its uncomfortable.

Jan is like c’mon don’t think like that. And Hank is like well, I’m going to give it a chance. But if things start going badly, boy howdy, I’m going to summon a robot to beat up my friends! Also Hank himself! That’s right! He programmed a robot to beat the shit out of him!

And then when things look their worst, Hank will save the day by blasting the robot in the secret weak spot and saving the day!

Jan tells him not to do this dumb thing.

Yellowjacket: “SHUT UP! I’ve got to do this! I’ve got to save the day right before their eyes! Don’t you see? It’s my only chance to redeem myself! It’s the only way!”

And there’s no way to really sugarcoat this. Hank just hauls off and hits her.

Or makes a very dramatic gesture and accidentally strikes her.

Jim Shooter has said that the hit wasn’t in the script.

Jim Shooter: “In that story (issue 213, I think), there is a scene in which Hank is supposed to have accidentally struck Jan while throwing his hands up in despair and frustration - making a sort of ‘get away from me’ gesture while not looking at her. Bob Hall, who had been taught by John Buscema to always go for the most extreme action, turned that into a right cross! There was no time to have it redrawn, which, to this day has caused the tragic story of Hank Pym to be known as the ‘wife-beater’ story.”

I don’t know. As I said last time with Gorn and Linnea, Hank is reflected in Gorn. And Gorn intentionally hit Linnea.

This doesn’t necessarily mean that it was set in stone that Hank would hit Jan. But it seems like it was foreshadowed in that way.

And here’s the thing: whether Hank intentionally hit her or not doesn’t really matter with how the story comes off and is attempting to come off.

Before he, intentionally or not, hits Jan directly he has also sicked a robot on her (and under-reacts when she says the robot is hurting her) and smashed his fist near her when she was small sized.

Any one of these would be unacceptable behavior.

And even if it was an accidental hit, Hank doesn’t express remorse or guilt or even awareness that he did a bad thing. He just keeps ranting as she’s sprawled to the floor.

Yellowjacket: “You’ve got to understand -- ! I can’t let them drum me out of the Avengers! I can’t! It’s all I have left! Since you had to stick your nose into my business, you’re in this with me now, Jan! I’ll keep it simple for you! All you’ve got to do is play along and keep your mouth shut! Got that?”

So. Yeah. Inadvertent or intentional doesn’t really change anything here. His behavior in this entire scene is beyond the pale.

So we time skip to the present of 4:27 PM, twenty-seven minutes after the start of the court martial and twenty-seven minutes of no show.

Tigra is getting frustrated.

Tigra: “I want to get this craziness over with! You know I’ve been an Avenger for a week! I feel pretty silly judging a guy who’s been around since day one!”

She asks if she can just cast a vote for acquittal preemptively and fuck off.

Iron Man says of course not! Although he thinks to himself that if it were possible, he would have done it and probably Thor too.

So that’s the situation regarding the Avengers’ thoughts on this court martial. Tigra wants to just vote to acquit because she’s only been here a week. Iron Man and probably Thor would also like to just vote to acquit. And Captain America is going to prosecute as hard as he can but is secretly hoping that Hank gets acquitted.

Far from Hank’s belief that the court martial is just a formality.

Anyway, Hank and Jan (wearing sunglasses) show up.

Yellowjacket: “Sorry we’re late! The George Washington Bridge was jammed as usual!”

Captain America: “No harm done, Hank!”

Yellowjacket: “You mean you won’t be pressing additional charge for malicious tardiness, Cap?”

Captain America: “Uh... let’s get started!”

Yeah. Off to a great start. Just. Not a good foot, Hank.

So the court martial starts! Thankfully the table has had a growth spurt or maybe got switched out for a bigger table.

So the voting will be by Tigra, Thor, and Iron Man. Wasp may participate but not vote because she’s Hank’s wife. Cap will prosecute.

And begin to prosecute he will do!

Captain America: “Four days ago, Yellowjacket blasted an enemy in the back -- an enemy who had already ceased hostilities! We all know that Hank’s no coward and not one to panic! It was a mistake... a misjudgement made on the spur of a tense, pressured moment! It could have triggered disaster!”

“But it didn’t! We were lucky! So, the temptation is to forget it... write it off! We tend to feel that way because each of us thinks that it’ll happen to us someday!”

“Wrong! We can’t let it happen! We’re the Avengers, not the Brooklyn Dodgers! One ‘error’ by one of us can cost thousands of lives! We don’t dare allow ourselves to think it’s ever all right to make a mistake!”

“Our responsibility is overwhelming! We’ve got to judge ourselves harshly! I recommend for Yellowjacket, as I would for myself, the severest possible penalty!”

So at this point Hank can please guilty to the charges and rely on the mercy of the court or defend himself from the charges.

And Hank decides to plead not guilty, of course!

Okay, so what’s your defense, Hank? You actually have a possible avenue here that Elf-Queen didn’t speak English and you were behind her so it was difficult to tell that hostilities had ceased and plus she had tossed your new teammate into space.

Are you going with something like that?

Yellowjacket: “I don’t deny the sequence of events as Cap described them... more or less! Yes, when it seemed as though the enemy had ceased fighting, my attack -- my ‘mistake’ -- seemed treacherous! But I find it odd that the great Captain America never even once considered treachery on the part of the enemy!”

“She could have been setting him up! By striking when I did, in the way I did, I may have actually saved his life! But is he grateful? No! Why not, one may ask!”

“Well, perhaps you noticed that the ‘enemy’ in question was a beautiful woman! Does he think I didn’t notice the way he was looking at her? Well it’s no wonder he’s so upset!”

“You like her, eh, Cap? And I hurt her -- and that’s why you have this vendetta against me, even though I may have saved your miserable life! Oh yes! I was actually the hero out there! Me! But, then, you turned it all around... you made a fool out of me!”

“And it worked, didn’t it? That’s when she started looking back! Isn’t it? Isn’t it? ISN’T IT?”

Yeah. That. Just sort of says it all, Iron Man.

Hank senses that maybe his rant wasn’t quite as convincing as it sounded in his head and demands Jan tell them how right he is!

Jan: “... no more! Let it end! I beg you, Hank, if you love me... let it end!”

And Thor sees her black eye and reacts in shock, asking if Hank hit her.

By the by the way, this is also why Chuck Austen’s retcon that Hank had been physically abusing Jan for a while can fuck off. Because in his telling, the Avengers knew for a while and just didn’t do anything.

And I do not like that as a concept.

So since this is going not how he’d prefer, Hank pulls the killer robot remote out of his outside pants and activates the killer robot.

Its got to be sunk cost at this point, right?

Even if he saves the day from the killer robot, does he think that they’re going to forget the black eye and his rant that really Captain America is too horny?

AND THEN THE ROBOT BUSTS IN THROUGH THE WALL AND STARTS BEATING EVERYONE UP

with a KA-BWHOOM! naturally.

The Avengers rally despite the surprise and try to fight back but the robot is made of adamantium and we know how much trouble the Avengers always have with Ultron.

Cap tries throwing his shield at Sal and it doesn’t even yield! In fact, Sal catches the shield and slams it into Cap’s chest. Possibly caving in his ribs.

Iron Man tries to draw Sal off of the others by shooting repulsors at it but Sal zooms over really quick and punches him in the chest before he can react.

At this point Hank begins to have the faintest inklings that maybe he’s done a bad, specifically in creating a killer robot and programming it to attempt murder on his friends.

Yellowjacket: “I -- I hadn’t realized just how deadly, how savage Sal would be in full attack mode! I’ve got to zap his weak point before he hurts someone bad!”

And he probably forgot that he programmed Sal to kill him too because when Yellowjacket goes for the weak point, Sal swivels around and hits Yellowjacket, sending him WHOK!ing into the wall.

Oh. Hey. Sal’s turn and smack pose is vaguely similar to the thing between Hank and Jan.

Wonder if that’s intentional.

Hank is knocked so for a loop (by a robot that, I’ll remind you, he programmed to beat him up) that he almost passes out and has to struggle to his feet.

But he has to stay conscious because he’s the only one that can stop the threat he himself created!

And since Sal is kicking the shit out of Thor, the threat that Hank himself created really is a big one!

Yellowjacket: “C’mon, Hank! Suck it up! Make the room stop whirling! Focus... focus on the weak spot! Aim... disruptors on full force!”

But Hank takes too long and Sal finishes beating up Thor and grabs Hank in his claws. And hey more mirroring maybe! Like Jan before, Hank is in Sal’s claws and is being crushed.

And to fit the mirroring, Jan comes to Hank’s rescue. But out of actual, factual real concern for Hank’s pain unlike Hank earlier not reacting to Jan’s pain.

Again, I wonder if it was intentional. And I think in this case it must be?

Its because Hank put her through this nonsense earlier that Jan knows where the weak spot is and can blast it to save the day, the Avengers, and Hank.

Sal plops over with a KLANG!

And Hank...

Is not grateful.

Yellowjacket: “Why? Why did it have to be Jan? If -- if I couldn’t do it... why her? Why? Why?”

After everything, after every way in which his own plans spectacularly crashed and burned, he’s still  most concerned that Wasp outshone him?

Lets let Thor put it best.

Thor: “Thy plan... was foolish, Yellowjacket! A base and transparent ruse!”

But Yellowjacket doesn’t hear Thor or anything really.

Yellowjacket: “guess i’ll go now... guess... i’ll go.”

And he lurches out the door in a bit of a daze.

Iron Man: “Jan I -- I -- what should we do? What can we do?”

Wasp: “For me? Nothing! I’m okay... now! You know, I feel like crying... but I just don’t have any tears left!”

And that’s that.

I’ve said a lot of what I’ve had to say as we went along.

There’s more to come in this particular arc. Hank isn’t done yet!

What an ominous statement.

Follow @essential-avengers because I’m doing a good job, maybe. Please also like and reblog.

[daydreamingabouthockey]

Rough Day- Tyson Barrie

Plot: Tyson Barrie is having a rough time after being traded to Toronto. Y/n sees him on the TTC and tries to comfort him.

Note: I don’t know the guy or how he feels about the trade.But I guess anyone would be sad about being traded right? I loved him in Colorado so when he got traded from my favourite American team to my favourite Canadian team I was sad but happy. This was totally inspired by the fact I met him on the TTC a few months ago (he wasn’t crying don’t worry) but he was just staring off into space. he was lovely anyway. So thankful I got the subway that night instead of an Uber. Hockey gods were looking down on me!

Word count: 1,747

You stared down the platform, there was only one other person around, he was a a youngish guy. He was just standing there staring into space. You made eye contact but he noticed pretty quickly and turned away. that was awkward, you thought, but then again this was Toronto. You stare back up at the board, another five minutes to go. “Fuck should I should have gotten an Uber,” you mutter under your breathe shuffling your feet to keep warm. At least all of those leaf fans had gone now so the train would be empty. Not that you followed hockey, the fans were just a pain on match days. Finally you hear the hum and clink of the tram. “Finally” you huff.

You watched the tram doors open. It was empty now as a dozen people scurried off. It was nearly ten in the evening.The doors were about to shut when the young guy from earlier dashed through the door. He looked like he was in his mid twenties, with curly dark brown hair.His expensive looking suit and black coat he looked like a business man in the city.He let out a sniff and a laugh before sitting down opposite you. That’s when you realize he’s not laughing, he’s crying or more accurately sobbing. You stand there for a moment wondering what to do. You look around you two are the only people on the TTC. You stand there conflicted, he might be a weirdo crying but then again he sounded super upset. In this situation you’d want someone to check on you. Your mind was racing, if you heard something had happened to his guy tomorrow you would feel terrible you never said anything.

You get up and take the seat next to him. He doesn’t notice at first “Are you ok?” You ask, tapping him on his shoulder. “I mean obviously you're not but,” you say realising asking if he was ok was pretty dumb.

“No, not really I’m sorry I’ve just had a really bad day,” he says looking up at you with his dark brown eyes. His face is red and puffy from crying. “You wanna talk about it? I won’t judge,” you say giving him a simatheic smile

“I can’t,” he says looking down fiddling with his jacket sleeve.

“It’s okay, I’m sorry you're having a bad day…” you pause when you realize you don’t even know the man’s name. “Tyson,” he said sniffing again

“Tyson,” you said with a nod “I’m y/n”

“We all have bad days and that’s ok and there is no shame in crying, I don’t know what you're going through but, bad days and months they pass, I promise, I know it’s cliche, last month my boyfriend of five years out of the blue dumped me, it was hard we’d been engaged over a year, then my job made me redundant, I cried a lot but everyday the pain got less and less day and eventually I got back on my feet” you say, rooting through your bag for a pack of tissues. You finally find them and pass one over. “Really?,” he asked

“Yeah,” you says suddenly wondering why you’d told this stranger your life story. “That’s tough I’m sorry” ,he said dabbing his face.“its’s okay I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make it about me, I’ll leave you alone now, I just wanted to make sure you were ok,” you say awkwardly getting up “ no please don’t leave me, I might be getting fired,” Tyson blurts out. “And I really really don’t want to be, that’s why I was upset”

“Oh,” you said, plopping back down on the seat. “Well no- one wants to get fired,” you say slowly.“I’ve only just moved to Toronto in the last few months and that was really hard, leaving my friends in Denver, but I had no choice,”

“I can understand that, I hated leaving my friends and family in LA, what makes you think you're being fired? I mean you don’t know?” You ask gently “I messed up, big style and now my manager wants to get rid of me, I know they do, I’ve heard the whispers and the worst part is I could end up anywhere in another city or town I hate, I just want to go back to Denver, I miss it so much,”

“They can’t fire you for one mistake and come on now Toronto isn’t that bad,” you laugh “No I guess not,” he sighed “it's just like Toronto is the central city for what I do so everyone is looking at me, in Denver it was just easier,”

“Ah okay, are you from Denver then?”

“No Victoria BC, my work means can I move around a lot,I’ve lived in Denver for eight years though” he said you could see his face instantly change and light up when he mentioned Denver“Well now I get why you wouldn’t want to leave Denver, I’ve heard it’s beautiful around there,”

“Oh it is,” he says sadly and you realise you’ve said the wrong thing. “Not that Toronto isn’t great too,it’s just different,” he says.

“I wouldn’t normally do this but, do you want to go out for a drink?” You ask offering your hand to get up just as the subway came to a stop ‘Sure why not,’ he said with a shrug grabbing your hand.

In the end the you ended up at your place. The two of you sat with a glass of red wine. He stretched out on your sofa, his head in your lap. You ran your fingers through the curly locks of hair. He told you all about his friends back in Denver Nate who was a big dumb boy who insisted people called him Nate dog with two g’s. EJ, Josty who she realises is not his real name but a nickname is a loveable pest and then there is the clear leader of the pack, Gabe who in Tyson’s words looked like a Swede god.But had a very big head literally Which Nate and Tyson made fun of all the time. You in turn told him about your weird friends and family and how you ended up coming from sunny La to cold snowy Toronto. It was strange you felt like you had been friends for years. You felt such a sense of ease and peace with this guy, like conversation was never forced yet you knew you had no romantic feelings for this guy and you knew he felt the same. Tyson ended up crashing on your sofa and in the morning you cooked breakfast together before you both had to leave for work. But before you did he said something rather odd. “Can you not tell anyone about this my weird breakdown? Can it be between us?” He said adjusting his tie “Yeah sure,”

The pair of you swapped numbers, you kept in contact texting now and then. Tyson had said his work was a little better his co-workers were supportive of him. Which made you happy although you knew he still wasn’t a hundred percent happy. He had booked a trip to Colorado to see his friends in the summer. You had tried to meet up a couple times but his work kept him busy and you had lots of things going on too. You knew he worked unsocial hours but what he exactly did was still a mystery to you. It wasn’t until two months later, you got that answer, when you saw Tyson’s face again. Except this time it was on tv. You were sat in a bar with your gal pals nursing a glass of red wine. “Toronto Maple leaf Tyson Barrie, has been traded back to the Colorado Avalanche in return for Nazem Kardri, the Victoria born player Barrie spent the year playing for the leafs in a statement he said “I’ve enjoyed playing for the leafs this last year, but I’m excited also to go back to Denver and play again for the avs with my old buddies,” the screen showed Tyson being interview his face beaming with happiness, the same guy but so different from the one you met that night on the train. “Can you turn this up please?” You ask the bartender. He nods. “Y/n I didn’t realize you were this into sports,” your best friend Jan says looking at you surprised “I’m not not really but I’m just interested in this story,” you say signalling to Tyson Barrie who they were showing shots of on the ice, “oh Barrie,” Jan said rolling her eyes. “what?” You ask curious, you’d never really followed hockey before.“He was terrible for the leafs I’m glad we are giving him back,”she says pointing to Tyson. “Poor dude give the guy a break,” you say sympathetically, not taking your eyes off the screen. “Why are you defending him, you don’t even watch hockey,” Jan asks You shrug “I dunno I guess it can’t be easy, being a professional athlete, having all eyes on you,”

“Because you know a lot about that, poor little millionaire,” Jan said taking another sip of her wine and rolling her eyes. You know that you don’t really know what it is like but you got a glimpse into that life when you met Tyson on the train that night. You had no idea he was a millionaire. Wow. Even still millionaires aren’t exempt from mental health problems. Especially when all eyes are on you. Now you understood why he disliked Toronto for his job so much. Toronto media were known in any sense for being ruthless. You excuse yourself to the washroom and once safely in the stall you get out your phone and send a text.

To: Tyson

I’m happy for you. I told you it would all work out eventually. X

To: Y/n

Thanks y/n,

To: Tyson

I’m just a phone call away if you need to talk x

You slip your phone back into your bag. “Who are you texting?” Your best friend asked raising an eyebrow. You give a smile, you weren’t going to tell them about your night with Tyson, you'd promised that night would just be between the two of you. “Just a friend,” you say. Your phone pinged again.

To: y/n

I’ll let you know and next time I’m in town maybe we can grab a drink?

To: Tyson

I’d like that Tys, good luck in Colorado xx

[thesportssoundoff]

“A tremendous title fight, a buncha old dudes and moral dilemmas” UFC 237 preview

Joey

May 8th, 2019

In many ways, UFC 237 is a unique card and yet it is, in many ways, a throwback card. This is the sort of show the UFC tries to pull off when it knows what the main event is and it knows that it needs some serious protection. In the old PPV era, this would be the kind of card where your mileage would vary depending upon how hooked up to a nostalgia drip you are. Nowadays with them getting a guaranteed payout before a PPV even sees the air, this kind of card feels retro. It's got a competent title fight with a bevy of names you'd recognize who fall on the spoiled side of their MMA expiration dates. It's like a Mighty Mouse card (albeit with a far more compelling main event) in a market that still has pings and feels for a show like this. Brazilians want to see their heroes and so the company is trotting out the likes of Anderson Silva, Jose Aldo, Lil Nog, Thiago Alves and a whole host of familiar names and faces potentially for the last time. It's Brazil vs the world (for the most part) with just enough good vibes and fair matchmaking to give the fans potentially one big feel good moment. I just also know that this card is for a very niche audience which you might not be in there.

Fights: 13

Debuts: Viviane Araujo, Carlos QuirLoz, Luana Carolina

Fight Changes/Injury Cancellations: 4 (Wu Yanan OUT, Priscila Cachoeira IN vs Luana Carolina/Jessica Rose Clark OUT, Melissa Gatto IN vs Talita Bernado/Said Nurmagomedov OUT, Carlos Quiroz IN vs Raoni Barcelos/Melissa Gattoo OUT, Viviane Araujo IN vs Talita Bernardo)

Headliners (fighters who have either main evented or co-main evented shows in the UFC): 11 (Anderson Silva, Jose Aldo, Rose Namajunas, Jessica Andrade, Thiago Alves, Francisco Trinaldo, BJ Penn, Clay Guida, Big Nog, Bethe Correia,Priscila Cachoeira )

Fighters On Losing Streaks in the UFC: 2 (BJ Penn, Priscila Cachoeira)

Fighters On Winning Streaks in the UFC: 7 (Jessica Andrade, Rose Namajunas, Alexander Volkanovski, Jose Aldo, Carlos Diego Ferreira, Irene Aldana, Raoni Barcelos)

Main Card Record Since Jan 1st 2017 (in the UFC): 25-11

Rose Namajunas- 3-0 Jessica Andrade- 4-1 Anderson Silva- 1-1 Jared Cannonier- 2-3 Jose Aldo- 2-2 Alexander Volkanovski- 5-0 Thiago Alves- 2-2 Laureano Staropoli- 1-0 Francisco Trinaldo- 2-2 Diego Ferreira- 3-0

Fights By Weight Class (yearly number here):

Lightweight-  3 (30) Women’s Bantamweight- 2 (5) Welterweight- 2 (29) Women’s Strawweight- 1 (12) Women’s Flyweight-  1 (14) Light Heavyweight- 1 (17) Featherweight-  1( 21) Middleweight- 1 (15) Bantamweight- 1 (24)

Heavyweight- (15) Flyweight- (7)

2019’s Records We Keepin’ Track Of:

Debuting Fighters (11-30):  Carlos Quiroz, Melissa Gatto, Luana Carolina

Short Notice Fighters (13-15): Melissa Gatto, Carlos Quiroz, Priscila Cachoeira

Second Fight (30-7): Ryan Spann, Laureano Staropoli, Thiago Moises

Cage Corrosion (Fighters who have not fought within a year of the date of the fight) (10-18): Bethe Correia, Rose Namajunas

Undefeated Fighters (16-22): Melissa Gatto

Fighters with at least four fights in the UFC with 0 wins over competition still in the organization (6-6): BJ Penn

Weight Class Jumpers (Fighters competing outside of the weight class of their last fight even if they’re returning BACK to their “normal weight class”) (14-9): Kurt Holobaugh

Twelve Precarious Ponderings

1- If this show was on traditional PPV, how many buys would it get? Is 125K satisfactory given the conditions?

2- Rose Namajunas vs Jessica Andrade IS in all honesty a compelling title fight. It pits pretty much the division's top finisher (Rose Namajunas) against the division's top pressure fighter (Andrade) with the champion opting to face the champion on HER home turf, creating for a pretty compelling narrative to be told. They have more similarities offensively than people give them credit for; both Rose Namajunas and Andrade do their best work coming forward, pressuring albeit in different ways. They're cardio machines, cutting a pace early and dictating both the range and the tempo of the fight. For Rose, she's long enough and creative enough that its a pick your poison type affair. You can fight her at range, get picked apart from a distance with kicks and her really good straight shots OR you can blitz her, clinch with her and hope you're strong enough to win inside consistently. Andrade offers you no choice but to fight her fight for however long it goes. She cuts a relentless pace, has Mr. X level pursuit and while I think her power shouting vs Karolina was more of a perfect shot, she hits hard enough to break just about anybody. Even against Joanna, she still did her thing (pressure, come forward, blitz like a mad woman) which Joanna having the ability to win behind a tremendous jab and superior footwork. Rose CAN follow Joanna's gameplan of kicks + jab + circling for twenty five minutes, flustering Andrade from a distance but I'm not sure if she can do that while dealing with the pressure of Jessica Andrade for 25 minutes. Even against the likes of Tecia Torres and Joanna, Rose had those lapses in concentration where it felt like she stopped fighting her fight and needed to be reminded by her corner to mentally check back in. You have to be there every single second of an Andrade fight because she is a momentum creature.

3- Given how hard Andrade pressures and how long Rose is, I wonder if takedowns are going to be apart of the gameplan for Namajunas. Andrade's build and her wrestling normally prevent attempts but Rose is the better grappler by far who can probably score a finish in a variety of spots on the ground. Being underneath Andrade's ground and pound is a miserable endeavor BUT she's also reckless enough that limbs and necks get left out there for experienced enough submission artists. Could/Would Rose pull guard?

4- If Max Holloway is going to fight in Anaheim as he's suggested (Late August for those curious),  you have to assume that Volkanovski vs Aldo is a pseudo #1 contender fight. So what happens if Aldo wins? Is that where the UFC blows the dust off of Frankie Edgar?

5- Does anyone truly believe Anderson retires after this fight with Jared Cannonier?

6- Looking at this card on paper with its host of "legends" bound to generate some buzz in Brazil, it's a bummer they couldn't of found a way to get Johnny Walker on the card. Would've been a great rub for him with guys like Aldo and Silva on the show.

7- At some point Francisco Trinaldo is going to buck the conventional wisdom and fight like his age, right?

8- I don't know if it's the fact that they're both elder statesmen who fight younger than they are but look older than their birth certificates claim or the fact that both basically cut their teeth carving up mid tier dudes in their respective divisions but Francisco Trinaldo and Cowboy Oliveira sure seem to have a lot in common. Both are really aggressive somewhat limited guys whose limitations show up when they attempt to make the long march to the top of their division. Both Oliveira and Trinaldo rely on brute force strength with so-so fight IQ but a surprising wealth of ways to be violent if they so choose them. Trinaldo faces Carlos Diego Ferreira who burst onto the scene with the UFC and then just kinda stalled out in no small part due to injuries and one of those supplement suspensions. Carlos is coming into his own based off back to back wins vs top competition and while I don't know if he'll ever be a consistent top 10-15 lightweight, there's light at the end of the tunnel for him. This fight should be insanely violent in spurts.

9- Worth noting that if she beats Bethe Correia, Irene Aldana will be on a three fight winning streak which should put her on the short list for women to potentially challenge Amanda Nunes. Especially since beating Bethe seems to be one of those secret passageways to a title shot.

10- I've never seen a more desperate attempt to milk out a win for a guy than Lil Nog vs Ryan Spann. Even in his faded borderline decrepit form, Lil Nog should have very little issue taking a W here.

11- Thiago Alves vs Laureano Staropoli has some sneaky FOTN potential. Laureano is an all action pressure forward fighter who like most guys out of non-Brazil South America has no idea what he's not supposed to do. As such, anything is on the table and AS such he fights like a guy who has a penchant disregard for his well being. Thiago Alves is no longer the kind of guy who can casually eat up the Staropoli types of the world and his last few fights have basically been him trying to be a sharpshooting counter striker who throws power shots at will. It should be a fun fight at the very least.

12- And I guess we gotta end negatively with BJ Penn. There's no reason for this fight to be happening from a pure actual fighting standpoint. I read someone elsewhere mention how "frail" BJ Penn looks as a fighter and I truly lack an actual better description for it besides that. He looks weathered. He looks old. He looks like a guy who knows how to only do one thing and he can physically no longer do it at any rate of success. Whatever you think of the legacy of BJ Penn or however you feel about his right to compete, it shouldn't be happening anymore and at the very least not at this level. This doesn't even account for the fact that he has so much turmoil in his life and while allegations can sometimes be just that, we've got a whole forrest fire worth of smoke telling us something is wrong. We all just recently read Babalu discuss the problems he's facing currently in his life after a long career of fighting. It should make us all stop and reconsider whether there needs to be such arbitrary lines of when enough is enough and how we can find the bridge for these guys when the time has come. BJ Penn isn't fighting because the UFC thinks he can do it; he's fighting because if not here then somewhere else and because there's always going to be a market for seeing your "heroes" compete. There are BJ Penn fans who watched the third Edgar fight thinking he could pull it off, there are BJ Penn fans who watched thinking he'd turn back the clock vs Dennis Siver. The UFC gave him the SAFEST possible match up in a guy they didn't think would hurt him and it still ended in disaster.

And yet on the same card, we have Anderson Silva who is 44 years old coming ooff of multiple surgeries, a career that includes some truly violent spectacle fights in his earlier days who has been rocked or KO'd in four of his last six fights. He was apart of one of the more violent gym cultures in the history of MMA. His family apparently asks him to retire after every fight, now running on what feels like four years worth of it. So if Penn's gotta go then shouldn't Anderson go? Even if my eyes tell me that he's got more in the tank, we're still comparing two guys who are clearly either firmly out of gas or running on E. Is it the fact that Anderson Silva by all accounts is a well adjusted guy who isn't in trouble? I mean wouldn't that make you more likely to want him to hang it up so he can preserve the way he is? I don't have all of the answers and so much of this is just emotion. All I know is I hope that this card is very much the last of its kind; a farewell to a lot of guys who made a special time in MMA with also a promise to do better by them in the future.

[voicetonki]

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[melodyoffiction-blog]

Fragment

I’m back...after a long while.

Was struggling with life and all but I’ve started briefly on a new fic on Hollow Knight. And what if a person of this world find themselves somehow within the world of the Hollow Knight?

Well that plot bunny just dashed off so I had to write something.

cross-posting to Archiveofourown!

Friday - 5th Jan.

Dear...well..diary I suppose?

It felt like I should start a new diary for the year even though it’s been 5 days in. Therapy seem to think it’s a good idea anyway. I’m suppose to write something even if it’s just a sentence long.

Such a chore.

Anyway!

I’ve just got a new game a couple months ago. Hollow Knight.

To be fair I’ve been playing it for a long time with many reruns! Gosh, the lore sometimes fucks with my brain. Like parts of it is missing or something?

Anyway! I’ve played so much that I’ve started dreaming of it! Isn’t that great?

Well...dreaming of some kind of Hollow Knight themed thing anyway. The bugs I’ve seen were huuuuuge. Clearly my imagination is much more creative then I am.

Saturday - 6th Jan.

I couldn’t get up from bed today. Played HK.

Sunday - 7th Jan.

I told Tony & co. I can’t make it to the party. I’m in bed. Sigh maybe I should try harder?

Monday - 8th Jan.

I finally managed to communicate with the bugs in my dream! They told me so many interesting things!

Like they could talk without their mouths moving! It’s like an X-men thing! Telepathy!

Apparently they’re all of the same species, or generally the same species? All the children are grub-like anyway.

I hope I dream of HK again!

Tuesday - 9th Jan.

Didn’t dream at all. Must be the new meds.

Wednesday - 17th Jan

I’m not sure if I was hallucinating but I’ve heard their voice when I’m awake. I mean it’s only a whisper and I couldn’t make out what they said but I swear I heard them! Maybe it’s a sign of schizophrenia or something. But I doubt so….

Saturday - 20th Jan

Everyday feels empty. I wake so tired nowadays...but at least I got to dream every night for the past week! I’ve learned so much about my imaginary world! There’s even different religions. I’ve seen some bugs experimenting with something that looks like soul and void and radiance! Maybe it’s my mind trying to fill the void of history. I mean the Pale King can’t actually be the one that gives intelligence to the bugs. There’s like huge statues of ancients and Quirrell ventured out of Hallownest with his mind intact!

Tuesday - 13th Feb

I’ve just flushed the sleeping drug that therapy gave. It’s not making life any easier to bare and I’d rather feel tired on waking than not dreaming at all…

Thursday - 15th Feb

Their voice is louder now. Still slightly above a whisper but now I could hear the words!

They’re begging for help. “Help….h---lp Us” or something like that.

What is going on?

Monday - 26th Feb

The dreams I had are surreal! I’m starting to doubt if it’s a dream at all! But it must be! I mean clearly it stems from all the time I’ve spent gaming…

Saturday - 17th Mar.

Lifeblood. Radiance. Void. Soul.

Arcane eggs are knowledge orbs. Uses soul to open.

Radiance - Moths (dreams, foreknowledge)

Void - Bettles (power, strength beyond all)

Lifeblood - ??? They look like..spiders? Six eyed insects…(healing, time halting)

Soul - unity of all 3, newest god, arcane powers.

I mean shit summary I know!

But they asked for my help, physically in a dream. They said I have time to choose as it’s a heavy choice. But to be fair, it’s not like there’s much for me in this world anyway…the only time I feel anything is within my dreams….that’s pitiful, huh.

A dark claw pats fondly on the slightly cracked mask of a small Vessel. Their voice croaks:

Over decades, different insect species evolved.

Moths started worshipped Radiance, in its glorious light and in prophetic dreams. She whispers to them, guiding them and giving them the power of foreknowledge,

Beetles worshipped the Void,

the dark and endless being,

he embraces them in life and soothes them in death.

He bestowed onto them the knowledge and strength of one who does not fear death,

for death is a way of unity with past ancestors.

Few follow the gentle sway and gleaming wings of Life.

She who breathes new life into all.

Though reclusive by nature,

they spend their lives guarding the condensed form of lifeblood.”

Looking down with all six eyes, at the small form with the cracked mask, they smiled gently as they load yet another harvest of lifeseeds into the small structure as they continued on their brief lecture of history to the silent, still form.

But a special few refuses to pick sides chose to be guardians of being. Guardians of the soul. For within every living being there is the soul in which arcane arts are made from. Where even the tiniest, youngest bug learns to use, to fuel their legs and jump higher than any should be able to.

Hahaha that was a fond memory of my youth. Got into such trouble too....ah...where was I...

Oh yes! Ahem.

Yet as it always is and will always be, not all experiments were for good causes and some got greedy for power. The boredom of this static life reflects in the boldness of their experiments. What was once created for the search of knowledge became creations of greed. For what is more important than the collection of more power. Slowly the bugs of power forget that their Gods were living, breathing beings too, although not ones encased within hard shells.

The dark being pinged the Vessel's mask as it continues pouring lifeseed after lifeseed, slowly submerging their form.

The moths claimed that the Pale King persuaded them to forget the Radiance, and that is what caused the start of the infection. The Pale King claimed that sacrifices are made for the greater good. For no cost is too much to sacrifice to stop the infection and he created thousands of vessels to contain it forever.

Yet not one bug remembers, remember the ancient beings that ripped the heart of Void into shreds.

Just to milk out one. last. drop. of power.

They took from the Radiance so much light,

that even the foreknowing ones are blinded.

It's voice shook with simmering anger.

We, the guardians of Lifeblood has seen this and fled, just barely, before the claws of the greedy, before they close around our God. And Soul, the youngest of the four gods, the strongest but also in some ways, the most fragile. Poor Soul was forgotten by the heretics.

As the essence of Radiance warped and no longer laid within our eggs, as void in his madness no longer embrace us. Soul weakens in every generation till now they lay dormant in all!

All due to the greed of ones who were trusted to guard their Gods. Fools all of them.

But now we, the true loyals, must run and hide.

The old, decrepit ancient being gave the small vessel a last stroke with their still shiny black claw as they encourage the living bark to grow over the now submerged Vessel.

Hide. All of us. But you dear one.

You will help Soul regain their foothold and bring the glory days back again.

...Well...one can only hope.

We’re lucky you landed without our reach. Our legs aren’t the best for climbing down this damned pit...and we're starved of company so we're sorry for the long rambling, young one.

They wobbled off, whistling a soft tune as the Lifeblood plant branches grew around them, concealing the newest secret they now hold within their branches.

[tarrdirtwormni]

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