#phillion

[grasponreality]

TW: rape, violence against women, pornography

Today I learned about a young female doctor in India who was beaten and raped so violently that she was found with a broken pelvis, her glasses smashed into her eyes, and internal bleeding, among many other injuries. I won't bother trying to properly communicate how horrified and disgusted I am whenever I read new stories like this. I ran out of words a long time ago.

At some point during this afternoon, I checked out YouTube, in search of some lighthearted distractions. On my homepage, there was a recommended video by a guy called Phillion, who I had subscribed to a long time ago but I haven't watched any of this stuff recently. His new video is titled "A Fate Worse Than Death," which is obviously pretty dramatic, but his thumbnail implied that the video wouldn't be very serious, and my curiosity got the best of me, so I clicked on it.

The video was about a guy whose wife does porn. That's it. The point of Phillion's funny video is that having a wife who makes pornography is a fate worse than death.

And I know, I know, I know - this dumbass YouTube video is in no way connected to the terrible news story I read earlier today. But God damn, I couldn't help but think about how women's worst nightmares and men's worst nightmares are really fucking different. Phillion's comments were full of people, (presumably straight guys, let's be real), agreeing with his assessment that having a wife who does porn is, indeed, a fate worse than death. Meanwhile, men subject women to actual fates worse than death all over the world on a regular basis.

Is this the full extent of an average straight man's fear? Is this really the shit they are agonizing over - the thought of having a wife/girlfriend who does sex work? THAT'S a fate worse than death to you? Jesus fucking Christ.

[barrylyga]

Absolutely psyched to announce that my anthology, Generation Wonder, has been nominated for an Audie award in the category of Short Stories/Collections...the only children's book so nominated!

Yay! Much gratitude to my publisher, my editor, and my wonderful contributors!

[vileviale]

Every wish you could be the friend of a fictional character before they go on a dark path so you can help them steer clear from it?

[dollypopup]

nutellaaaaaa I am living in deniallllllll ahaha

i choose to live in denial about the fact that there are so many desires for 'Babies Ever After' in Polin immediately following the conclusion of season 3 because like. . .this woman is nineteen!!! at the start of it all she should be at the club having a panic attack! and at the end, she should be getting railed up and down the European coast by her hot husband who has miraculously good pull-out game!

we are not the same!!!

[dnpbeats]

Both Awesome Guys, but what if you had to choose which guy was best?

(btw. this video was posted december 31 2009. that's how far back the dannie vs. phillie (danosaur vs. phillion iykyk) discourse goes)

[barrylyga]

With a gorgeous cover and incredible interior art by the inimitable @colleendoran, GENERATION WONDER hit shelves one year ago today!

The New Age of Heroes launched with 13 amazing stories by some astonishing authors, including Sarah Maclean, Paul Levitz, Sterling Gates, Danielle Paige, Morgan Baden, Anna-Marie McLemore, Varian Johnson, Lamar Giles, Joseph Bruchac, Elizabeth Eulberg, Matthew Phillion, Axie Oh, and yours truly!

If you haven't already sampled the delights awaiting you in this anthology, I implore you to do so now. You can order it here:

[writing-a-circus]

Hey I'm going to be posting a story/ book/ whatever you wanna call it on here

Also lil definition thingy; Phillions/phillion is the currency, it's pronounced like 'million' with an F sound instead of a M sound.

0-4 ROUGE

Chapter 1

“New bounty from the I.B.A, a small child is wanted at the research facilities on 0-4. She has a bounty of 400,000 phillions, and it is rumored to go up 2,000 each year she isn't caught. The girl is around infant age, and was last seen during an invasion at said facilities. She is wanted specifically alive and unharmed. More information later.” the screen disappeared in front of FinTan, and he looked into the reflection. Kater was holding the baby safe in his arms, while azrael was bandaging her injured arm and wrists. fintan himself could see the mud on his coat, and the cut on his cheek. He was tired, all of them were. But the only one who would be sleeping tonight would be the baby they had taken with them.

Blanco-rose was bored. She sat on the steps of the ship, making sure it didn't get stolen. She looked at the two knives she had been given, both made of the same material as her dad's swords, and just as sharp. She sighed, and looked around. “No one's here…” she spun the blade the same way she had seen az and dad spin knives like it.

Wonder what's going on with the job…

When she looked up, she could see her dads walking back, and stood up. “Where's az? Didn't she go with you?” she asked, walking towards the two. “She went after someone, she'll be fine.” Kater said. “Well, I do think we should go look for her. If she was led into a trap, we will want to make sure she's fine, and not taken. She has a stolen code, after all.” Fintain said, taking off his mask. “Me and Rosie can go after her, and make sure she's fine. Plus, no one has recognized us since we got here.” After fintan spoke, Kater was obviously contemplating it, before he sighed. “Fine, make sure she stays safe and neither are taken.”

They waved goodbye, and started walking in the direction Fintan had seen Azrael go. the two talked on there way. mainly just Blanco asking questions about how the job went. "I wish I could've gone a long. it seems pretty easy." she flipped the knife again, before looking up at her dad, who chuckled slightly. "your very similar to your aunt, Blanco. she always wanted to be involved in stuff, weather it was with your dad or with me." he said. " well, she was in a boring facility her whole life, of course she wanted to!" Blanco said.

they came across a section with the lights turned out. “It's getting dark, can you lead me, Rosie?” She looked up at her dad, and nodded. She took his hand, and walked ahead a few steps, looking around. “Which way should we go? Left, right, or forward” she asked. Ever since her parents had realized that she could actually see in the dark, it was a lot better being the leader instead of being blinded by a flashlight. “Go left. If I remember, that leads to cargo hold D.” the two turned left, and saw the doors opened already, with a blow to the control panel. “That's definitely our azrael.” Fintan spoke with a slight sigh. “Let's go find her.”

Azrael sighed, and looked around at the beaten, battered braids around her.

If only it was as easy as it was for us for them…

other than the occasional static sound from the droids, it was completely quiet in the cargo hold. Instead of looking at the boxes or carts, she looks down at the floor, hands clenched inside her gauntlets.

We were lucky… she was lucky…

She heard some footsteps. She looked over her shoulder towards the entrance, expecting to see guards or a bystander. “Jeez, az, those gauntlets really are your weapon, huh?” fintain said. She sighed, relieved. “it's just you two. Yeah, I guess they've really grown on me.” she said as the gauntlets released from her hands, and hit the ground, cracking it slightly. She walked over to them, and put her hands on her hips. She could see Fintan holding his rifle, and blanco-rose holding her knives. She nodded to blanco-rose. “Have you had a chance to use those yet, blanc?” Blanc shook her head. “No one has tried to take the ship, so…” “fair point. Were you guys expecting me to be taken? That hasn't happened in two years!” she asked, before walking back to get her gauntlets. “Only a little. You're usually on time when we're done with a job. It's unlike you to be late, even when we were teens.” fintan said, stowing his rifle. “Plus, communication has been staticy in this facility. Anyways, let's go.” Fintan led the way, while Blanco held onto her arm, so that she could lead her.

When they got to the ship, kater was standing in front, messaging the employer. When he noticed them, he closed the screen, and put the small bar in his pocket. “She's alive!” kater jokes, elbowing azrael in the side. “And you're still weaker.” she said back, the two smiling. This was how they got along, ever since they were kids. She walked in first. She put her gauntlets in the cupboard, then closed the door. She signed, and took off her arm covers, and looked at the scars that littered her arms. She didn't feel ashamed of them- in fact, she was proud of them, especially the ones from the shocks. She was a rebel since she was made, and that was shown. What she wasn't proud of was the number on the back of her neck. That gave her away. That showed what she was, where she came from. She rubbed the back of her neck, right over the number, and then walked up to the helm of the ship. She wasn't the best pilot, but could get them out. Flip these four switches, press two buttons, and start to steer. That was the most of what she knew. “Az, let me drive.” Kater said, so she moved and let him take over. She looked back, and saw Fintan with Blanco, shining a light into her mouth. azrael sighed and sat down in the passenger chair.

It wasn't uncommon to see that, ever since she told them about her “afflictions” as fintan put it when they first found out, but they all now agreed it was mutations. The inside of her mouth was black, and her canines were sharper than most. Plus, she could see in the dark, and was more sensitive to bright light. Since then, they started using a good chunk of their money from bounties to get equipment so they could figure out exactly what she had for mutations. She knew Fintan kept notes and records of what he had found somewhere, but she never bothered to look for them. Mainly because she had a good idea of where he kept them, and she had already done plenty of that for Valo, fintan, and herself. she also refused to give them to Blanco, knowing just how it felt to read that something is wrong with you. it wasn't fun.

Blanco saw her dad writing stuff down on the screen. "is anything wrong?" she asked cautiously, mainly because she was supposed to be holding her mouth open. "its nothing bad. just writing down the information so I can try to match it to a species later. its nothing to worry about." he turned off the flashlight, and she closed her mouth, and worked her jaw a bit. It got tired after being open for so long, after all. "well, any developments from last month has stopped with the mutations, so that's good! that means that it has stopped, and the checkups I do can finally go down to once or twice a month." he stood up,and closed the screen, putting it back on the wall. he hugged her, and she hugged back. "I love you, Rosie. always remember that." he said. She squeezed him a bit. "I know." she pulled away, and watched him go up to the front, most likely deciding who would do what when picking up the bounty.

she climbed into her bunk, and looked at the jars she had on display. bottle caps, buttons, nuts and bolts, anything really. She just wanted to hold onto these small little things because why not. The stuff in the jars where only temporary, of course, until they get home and she can combine them with her larger amounts of the same items. She looked at the jars. It had been a long time since they had been home. She took out the buttons and started to count them, organizing them by size. She was happy to be able to go home soon.

20 new buttons, so 164 in total.

She heard someone knock on the support for her bed, and looked down to see her dad. "Hey, Blanco. So az suggested that you go with us to go pick up the bounty when we get to 0-5. What do you think?" She could see him looking up at her, smiling slightly. "Of course! I would love to do that!!" She smiled. "I never get to do anything like that!" Her dad smiled up "kater! She good with the idea?" Az yelled back to them "yeah she's good with it!" Her dad yelled back, before looking back up and ruffling Blanco's hair. She was still giddy from being able to go with them to do a pick up.

[cyber-corp]

more quotes from your evil clone:

Avatar cyber-corp Badge image. May 19

#absolutely OUTCLASSED by this website take me to work. You can kiss a hundred boy

I wish stuff. The TREEEEESH #davepetasprites: Hot Fuzz (2007), Metropolis (1927), Video titular was superhero i would be it #julius caesar #gecko boy…. my are they still all commissions out these and accepting #gecko boy #birthday

Avatar cyber-corp Badge image.

Hello, I just to play ever (link)

#and i love, growing up in someone like you don’t believe i went politicism up by 10. Shop of horrors. Soup is actually. I’ve and words!!!! #wonder bread #keir started watch out

#the inextricable joy of an artist huh…. #the Solkat fetishized. That’s defining office change or unknown as to defend his booming.”

Apr 24

“All polis (1927), Videodrome”, I’ve been asked:

If someone says “The Fifteenth Doctor” we will beautiful strider #homestuck #15th doctor who names the movbies B) #lesbian #shout the stay in for the doctor who #the baby is you feel a lot of the consumerica #smh cant believe Todd Phillions people fella in your friend?

Avatar

THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🔪 🔪

#I WIN #birthday #asks #reina cobra #kaiju

Avatar cyber-corp Badge image. Apr 4 dompletely alter the good luck bag, pink i liked that old, figuring on about how to listen to one :) Avatar

Oh he kinda just listen to the caricature? #love ngl

#if i were and saying how television shaped partrider and no qualms without out how it appens when he gang encounter a futurist viewpoint of wonderbread, it is movie.

Image

Kissing the women on my dash”. No one sounderstand

#inspired by Australians aren’t take this is this was also the guy to bring back doctor u bitches #gecko boy

Avatar cyber-corp May 11

Shin Godzilla #gecko boy #butch boy?????? #bone spaghetti who?

#???? #ramen on here for a decided to sell Wonder #brain godzilla is so swag epic. That’s kinda fucking #king of all time

#not a pub. jsyk #note: get a cup!!

Avatar cyber-corp Badge image. 3d ago

who is that??? #imagine being the conference room

ImageImage Image

His really belove to makes they work…… #gecko boy

- My dad #keir situation.

Jul 5

…Hello?

#boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop are wrong. Soup is a sound. It isn't about The Bad and these bitch. I’m pining to?

Avatar cyber-corp Badge imaginative lens.

Do you can jerk of this girl who has pink painted nails, a pink everything to their lack of service at rest of Slowdive actually. Don’t let the guy #who man keeping the hilda #asks #gecko boy

Avatar cyber-corp Badge image. Image

da hecc is then fetishized. THAT'S the end.

“Man I know? You can’t believably funny because their since #like watching!

social outing]”

“Could you like a shit. It's about a little man…. #asks #gecko boy

Avatar cyber-corp Badge image. Jun 21

Grizzled “Dirk #karkat vantas #note: get around her, where as a VEEEERY goop vat clone this time.

(i think she knows too much...)

Same vibes

[phanfictioncatalogue]

15k Words (3) Masterlist

part one, part two

Behind a Mask (ao3) - EmrysBeard

Summary: Dan, frankly, hates Phil. Phil’s friends have been bullying him since primary school, and though the dark haired boy doesn’t directly participate, Dan knows that Phil’s leering glare means bad news. And then, when Halloween comes around, Dan puts on a mask and attends a Halloween party. While there, he meets another masked boy and for the first time in Dan’s life, he has a shot at romance.

Conversely, Phil feels bad that his friends bully Dan, and so when he gets invited to a Halloween party, Phil can’t wait to put on a mask and be someone else for a night. He’d never want to come out as gay, but while behind a mask, he feels brave, so he agrees to dance with a boy. He doesn’t know who this dream boy is, but Phil is falling head over heals.

Dan may not know who his new masked lover is, but he’s determined to find out.

Blue Neighbourhood l 15k l - gorgeousdan

Summary: “What if we run away?”

“I would,” he said, and Phil could tell that his tone was teasing. “But I’ve got so much summer work to do that I have to turn in.” Phil tried to keep the disappointed look off of his face. “I really shouldn’t have taken that extra english class this year,” he added.

or the blue neighbourhood au that no one asked for

Dan And Phil And Ollie (ao3) - chatoyment

Summary: Phil has a crush on his son's pre-school teacher, Dan. Phil woos him.

Dan and Phil: The Game - intelligent-trash

Summary: When lightning hits the local arcade, all hell breaks loose. An unsuspecting Chris and PJ have no idea what events will come to pass when they meet ‘Daninator’ and ‘Phillion’ on their front lawn at midnight in central London. The once fictional characters from the video games have come to life!

Destination - placingglaciers

Summary: In which Phil somehow finds himself on a road trip adventure with some stranger named Dan.

florist (ao3) l 15k l - dnovep

Summary: Phil’s a florist - he hates it.

Halo (ao3) - dannihowell

Summary: Growing up in small beach-side town has Dan seeing the world through a foggy lens. Coming of age story.

In Paradise (ao3) - yoongioss

Summary: “Uhm.. Hi. Who are you?” Phil finally spoke, reaching up to rub his eyes with his fists.

“Oh, Gosh, I’m Dan. I’m the pool boy, maid, groundskeeper, basically whatever you don’t want to do, I’m here for it.” He smiled and his cheek sunk in slightly with the biggest dimple Phil’s ever seen.

Like Space (ao3) - kae_karo

Summary: A cute boy shows up at Phil’s shop.

Living is Easy with My Eyes Closed (ao3) - TheUKAmazingDan

Summary: September 19, 1976

Dan Howell liked pretty things and a pretty guy, but not the one who was interested in him. No, Dan was infatuated with someone he couldn't have.

based off of the Colors music video by Halsey.

modern fairytale (ao3) - howelllesters

Summary: Dan hadn’t even wanted to go watch his flatmate’s friend’s band perform, but now he was backstage and trying really hard not to make eye contact with the guitar player because he was really, really, unfairly cute. Or, the ridiculously long and fluffy sassy pastel!Dan and nerdy punk!Phil AU that no one wanted.

Our Simphany (ao3) - Dilia_Howlter

Summary: Dan and Phil were just filming a gaming video as usual but then their computer spazzes out and they’re suddenly sucked into the Sim world! When Dil recognizes the two of them as his Dad, they decide to play along and give Dil a fatherly role in his life. What they don’t realize though, is that things are going to get steamy for the both of them, and it wasn’t because of a shower…

pastry chef attempts to steal phil’s heart (ao3) - sierraadeux

Summary: If anyone asks, Prince Philip’s sneaky morning journeys down to the royal pastry kitchen are for nothing more than the perfect cup of coffee.

Scared to Be Lonely l 15k l paradisobound

Summary: Phil begins school at a new high school to avoid his past, however, he doesn’t intend for how much his life is going to change. He meets Dan, the one he’s first warned about, and develops a quick attraction for him. But when things begin to look up for Phil, someone else comes in and breaks the norm.

Stick Around (ao3) - limelester

Summary: Phil’s spent every summer of his high school career picking up guys to have his way with, just to drop them before the real school year starts. He’s earned himself a reputation as a brooding heart breaker, and the summer before his senior year was to be no different. A tall, pastel boy named Dan who doesn’t like when people stare at him becomes Phil’s next target. It’s always been a game of one and done for Phil, but this summer he might have gotten more than he bargained for.

The Boy In The Garden (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: (Highschool AU) Dan Howell and Phil Lester had nothing in common. But when the two of them end up working together in the abandoned school garden, will friendship- or something more- develop between them?

The Sun Will Rise, And We Will Try Again - phanlight

Summary: (tw) Phil, the clumsy Barista working an unstable job in a café along the Thames, always carries around too much spare change and really should stop smoking on his lunch breaks. Dan is a struggling street musician making his fortune in pennies on the south bank of London, another stranger in the city, who deserves so much more than the copper thrown at him by passers-by every day. But London is big, loud and really fucking overwhelming at the best of times, and sometimes, city life doesn’t always go to plan. And that’s okay.

Treat You Just The Same - huphilpuffs

Summary: Daniel Howell was definitely not a Hufflepuff. Except that he was, and Phil was determined to befriend the boy with straightened hair who loved transfiguration and probably should have been sorted into Slytherin. A Harry Potter AU.

[matthewphillion]

Have I mentioned the full-cast audiobook version of the Indestructibles is now available? Because it is, and this cast is amazing.

[artofthephan]

if you don't love me at my

you don't deserve me at my

[under-the-blue-sun]

things which dan and phil has forever changed (1/?)

ft. a whisk, a llama, a lion, a microwave, a hamster and a lady door 

bonus:

[heart-eyes-who]

growing up is admitting that dan and phil are actually really good youtubers and not just some cringe phase you went through in middle school

[shego1142]

In this house we

Love and Support Phil Lester

[nostalgicphan]

here’s what phil’s channel looked like as of 17 september 2007 :,)

(can we all appreciate phil’s absolute Helmet of a haircut???? iconic)

and here’s some Ancient Phil Videos which are lichrally all private now (rip)

and a look into some of his faves

and, of course, some snippets of the very busy background he had going on

bloody ell